moreau integration paper #2 professor retartha moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 friends, family, and frisbee from making friends, to starting classes, to joining clubs, the first few weeks of college were long and tiring. then, after i finally felt acclimated to the new college lifestyle, new obstacles arose. despite the ability to call and facetime home, i found myself homesick. i have always spent a lot of time with my family, so when i went to college, i missed watching movies, eating meals, and car rides with them. and while the first weeks were all hustle and bustle, once the novelty of college wore off, i found myself with more free time than i had ever had in high school. this extra time to myself only fueled the feelings of homesickness, so i tried to find something to fill it with. i also anticipated that i would stay in touch with my friends from home (which just happens to not be the case whatsoever). though a slightly overwhelming challenge at first, i am trying to see these novel “college concerns” as ways to grow and find myself. as julia hogan explains in her article, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). as i mentioned earlier, i encountered much more free time this semester than i thought i would. when trying to choose how to best allocate this time, i always reminded myself that i’m at college for me and there are no expectations to meet except for my own. i love biology, and i am so excited to major in it, but all of the clubs and opportunities offered at notre dame were a way for me to explore https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau my other interests as well. rather than filling up my time with resumé activities, i explored clubs that just sounded like fun. i had gone to the club fair with the intention of joining a club that would help keep me active and provide an opportunity to make new friends. i first tried my luck with ice hockey, but unfortunately, they were looking for experienced players which was definitely not a criterion i fit. i kept my search up and was just leaving the ultimate frisbee table when one of the captains asked my name and encouraged me to join. i explained that i was severely lacking in the hand eye coordination department and that i had never played frisbee before except for a few times at the beach. she said that the team wouldn’t care and wanted to have me anyway. i was definitely nervous to attend the first practice, but i am so happy that i found this team. though i would like to say all of the practice has shaped me into a star frisbee player, this is far from the truth. nevertheless, i’ve been able to make many new friends and enjoy all of the practices and tournaments. at first, i had no clue how i wanted to spend all of the free time on my hands. in high school, i was so used to running around from activity to activity and assignment to assignment. this free time was something new that i had encountered, and with my time in high school being so hyper-fixed on prepping myself for college, it was important to me that i spend my free time in college how i wanted to, fulfilling no one’s expectations but my own. filling up my free time definitely helped a little with my homesickness, but it still wasn’t quite enough to erase all of those feelings. when considering which college i wanted to attend, i didn’t think too hard about distance from home other than in regards to travel—this was perhaps a mistake on my part. i’ve always been someone who voluntarily spent a lot of time with their family, and so being so far away, for such a long time, was hard for me. one thing i’ve noticed that has helped me feel a little closer to home is mass. every sunday, my family would go to 9 o’clock mass. attending mass on the weekends reminds me of the time my family spent together. “if people associated with holy cross speak frequently today about the ‘family-like’ atmosphere they encounter in our parishes and educational institutions, that is directly traceable to the combination of moreau’s teaching philosophy and his ideals for community life” (“holy cross and christian education” by the campus ministry of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). this quote from the holy cross and christian education pamphlet resonated with me as i had experienced the “family-like atmosphere” they discuss here. for example, at the dillon hall milkshake mass, when it comes time for the sign of peace, everyone goes around and hugs one another rather than shaking hands. it is small acts like this, both everyday around campus and during mass, that helps to create a family-like community here at notre dame which lessens my homesickness. finally, one last question i encountered at college was how much effort should i put into staying in touch with friends from home? when my friends and i said our goodbyes in august, we said we would stay in touch. in fact, we made a promise to send a selfie of ourselves in the group chat every day to make sure we kept the chat alive. that lasted about three days. when we came home for thanksgiving, i was lucky enough to see everyone i had been closest with in high school. honestly, based on how easy it was to fall back into our old conversation, it felt like we had never been apart. at first, i was worried that our lack of communication was going to be a huge problem, but this break showed me that true friends, those who you are meant to spend time with, won’t drift away. palmer sums it up when he says, “when we try to ‘make community happen,’ driven by desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks—we can make a good guess at the outcome: we will exhaust ourselves and alienate each https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189556?module_item_id=106340 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189556?module_item_id=106340 other, snapping the connections we yearn for” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). if the community, friendship, relationship, etc. is meant to be, it will remain strong and stand the test of time and distance. trying to create and maintain something that is not “natural” will only create further strain. the space college created between my friends and i is important as it showed us which relationships were important for us to maintain and which were not. throughout my first few months of college, i have encountered many new things. from extra free time, to homesickness, to staying in touch with friends, the reality of college wasn’t exactly what i expected. nevertheless, i’ve faced each of these new situations and tackled them to the best of my ability. as father jenkins once said in his 2021 commencement speech, “more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back. even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive” (“wesley theological seminary 2021 commencement address” by father jenkins – moreau fye week ten). all of the ways in which i responded to these new situations have helped me to grow as a person. i’ve found a new hobby, i’ve kept religion an important aspect of my life, and i’ve learned how to maintain long distance relationships. these situations may have been new and overwhelming at first, but how i’ve chosen to tackle them has helped me to shape and grow myself. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ moreau integration a journey of beliefs root belief #1: i believe that i grow by keeping my mind open. this belief has been cultivated through much self-exploration. when i first got to notre dame i had a difficult time making friends. i didn’t have many people who were my own age and i felt some freshmen were a little immature. this made me start closing myself off to plans and trying to meet new people. i tried to focus on the good and ignore all the negative things about myself because it felt good. once i decided to open up and accept the emotions i didn’t enjoy, that was when i started to make friends and grow. “you can't say, here's the bad stuff. here's vulnerability, here's grief, here's shame, here's fear, here's disappointment. i don't want to feel these.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this video really spoke to me because this was similar to the self-reflection that i went through about myself about letting myself be vulnerable and be myself. another reason i believe this is because of my experiences playing competitive golf. there was a period where i stagnated in my sophomore year of high school and i was playing well but i wasn’t really improving. this was a difficult time for me because it made me question my belief that i needed to keep an open mind to grow and improve. no matter what i would do, i tried new golf clubs, a different approach to the golf swing. i even tried to change the way i approach the game but i couldn’t seem to improve. i kept an open mind, looked at everything but nothing helped. finally, it was by seeing where the fundamental problem was with my game (my mental game) that allowed me to break through the barrier and reach the next level. i think it is best characterized by this quote from our video in our second week of the course. “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“should you live for your resume … or your eulogy ” by david brooks moreau fye week two). root belief #2: i believe that my home shaped who i am. i grew up in singapore, i moved there when i was 2 years old and i lived there until i was 20. i served 2 years in the singapore military, which taught me a lot about who i am as a person. i think this relates best to the letter written by father sorin to father basil moreau. the sense of purpose i felt while serving my country was similar to the way in the letter the brother went up to the altar and tried to fulfill his purpose to his dying breath (letter to fr. basil moreau ” by fr sorin moreau fye week five). this belief has been challenged multiple times throughout my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view life. in the military, i felt as though i didn’t fit in sometimes because i went to an international school rather than a local school. so sometimes they acted like i wasn’t singaporean. however, when i came here i found i really identified with my home and the experience that i had. it made me realize that the person i am at notre dame, the little inside jokes i have with my friends about the way i pronounce “blueberry” reminds me that my home really shaped who i am. i think i characterized this best in my poem inspired by george ella lyon: “i am from the red dot, where size isn’t a restriction, i am from the city, from hustle and bustle” ( where i’m from poem by george ella lyon (quote from ’s poem) moreau fye week six). i chose this quote specifically because i think the fact i used to live in the city is part of the reason why i can enjoy the beauty of notre dame’s campus. it gives me time to slow down a little and just think about how nice it is to be here. root belief #3. i believe that i pursue truth by looking at different perspectives i think this belief was cultivated during my time in high school along with the way my parents raised me. i used to disagree with some of the religious traditions that my family would follow, not being able to understand what was the reason behind it. my family encouraged me to research different faiths to try and understand what values our hindu religion was trying to teach. this is why i am an agnostic now. the quote that i think characterizes this best is “i came to find that the concept of loyalty, for example, has many degrees of understanding in the world--and that people act according to their understanding of things” (student reflections on faith by mariana class of 23’ moreau fye week three). i found that by seeing many perspectives of religious beliefs i could have my own definition of the truth of what god and faith are. i think that my experience of going to my first mass at notre dame helped to confirm this belief. i took it as a learning experience and was able to see many of the same values taught in hinduism that my parents follow in the sermons given by fr gerry. this belief was challenged in high school. there was an incident of misconduct between a male friend of mine and a female where from my perspective the female was clearly at fault. at this point, my belief was challenged because of my emotions. i refused to think about the other side of the story and i think that was a mistake. i do understand where it comes from though. in the reading for our 7th week in moreau, i understood why this belief was challenged by david brooks’ description of donald trump: “he gets away with his lies because he tells stories of dispossession that feel true to many of them.” (how to destroy truth by david brooks moreau fye week seven). now whenever i listen to an argument, political debate, or even see news of war. i think about both perspectives before trying to conclude who is right or wrong and what is true. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html root belief #4. i believe that forging life-giving relationships is key to happiness i am an extroverted person. i naturally derive all my energy from the people around me. i have always been like this and i really enjoy it. i had an experience with a toxic friendship in high school which confirmed this belief. the reading (5 signs you are in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor moreau fye week four) that we did in week 4 was especially interesting to me because when i read about characteristics of toxic relationships i realized just how toxic the friendship was. i found this to be true about that past friendship: “rest assured, you will eventually be dragged into a dramatic situation with this friend and they will definitely talk about you behind your back.” i really value my friends and that is why i think loyalty and honesty are important when being a good friend. these characteristics help me to form life-giving relationships rather than toxic ones. there have been times when i have had a falling out with my friends and that the relationships are not causing me happiness, but these are isolated events and i think that as a whole i am happier when i am with my friends and i have good relationships that can last distance, time without talking or small disagreements. this is exactly why i always do whatever i can to help my friends when they need it or cheer them up when they are feeling down. i spent two hours coloring with a friend a few weeks ago to help him get over some stress. i know how happy it makes me so i try my best to do the same for them. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ integration 2 moreau first year course integration 2 (1120 words) a new perspective in my life all through these months in notre dame i have observed that my root beliefs are what shape my decisions and needs. also all through the month of the moreau course i have observed that these contemplations and convictions are what make me one of a kind. my family and religion are a few angles that shape my decisions and convictions. be that as it may, there are times when i manage inner or outer disharmony without monitoring them. week 9 qqc encountering dissonance, showed me a few different ways that i can raise my care through care practice. this consolidates staying away from judgment and well actually being enduring our discernments. another way is to recognize the justification for abnormalities in our considerations. understanding our feelings and characteristics behind the anomalies is an opportunity to encourage further self-data. every so often, it's helpful to challenge our current feelings. this can be an inconvenient and an abnormal cycle anyway through the help of our loved ones we can see this movement as incredibly straightforward and agreeable. a genuine model is simply the possibility of humiliating before others, for example, by failing to remember our words during a discourse. notwithstanding, after additional ideas, we might conclude that it doesn't make any difference what others consider us and would thus be able to lessen the discord. last way is that we might see discord when we take part in another conduct (e.g., when we decrease a solicitation to an occasion we typically go to ensure our relaxation time). while this can feel off-kilter consistently, it's helpful to think about the reasons for our directness. week 10 qqc encountering brokenness, was about brokenness and pardoning those that hurt you. a statement from the book of scriptures that i acknowledged was, "every one of you should give what you have chosen in your heart to give, not hesitantly or under impulse, for god cherishes a lively provider. what's more god can favor you richly, so that in everything consistently, having all that you require, you will have large amounts of each great work." (2 corinthians 9:6-8) i for one accept that providing for those in need is the thing that makes us productive members of society. for instance, my mom in spite of my dad helped and accommodated our family notwithstanding her starting points and her restrictions. she helped and helped those deprived with no reimbursement or acknowledgment. she trained me to consistently offer in return and not to do it for remuneration, rather help them to make the world a superior local area. i need to have the option to reward those in most need actually like my mom. subsequently, my choice to begin my own public association named "christina's helpers". this association with the assistance of 7 volunteers and myself circumvented the local area and neighborhoods of mercedes, texas and supported/gave families the important hardware and supplies for the winters in texas. we gave warm blankets, hot chocolate, heaters, gloves, beanies, and jackets while likewise allowing them seven days of food for their families and themselves. we never requested anything in favor nor did we do it to become better, preferably we chose over doing it for supporting and aiding those in need inorder to change the world, to propel others to roll out an improvement. week 11 qqc encountering community, was about our local area and our effect as a group of people yet to come. lamentably, in the present current culture reinforcing bonds with one another may be troublesome because of a wide range of predispositions and thoughts. be that as it may, there are numerous ways for one to turn out to be nearer with individuals around them. zeroing in on your likenesses rather than your disparities, will cause individuals to feel more associated with you. assuming that you tend to wind up in conflicts, check whether you can invest more energy holding over what you do share for all intents and purposes. as the video: "with voices true snapshot summary" (klau center archive on race) states, " the account of race has many voices. understanding it starts with tuning in" when you concentrate on somebody, to the rejection of any remaining interruptions and contending needs, you let that individual know that you esteem them and their necessities the most. it's a solid certification of adoration and care, which will bring you closer. a last thought is being honest. being straightforward on the two sides of the relationship is a demonstration of mindfulness and trust. genuine companions come clean with you, regardless of whether it's difficult to hear. similarly, you should have the option to give legit criticism to your companions. at the point when somebody gives you criticism or clues about something you do, be tolerating and open to change rather than shielding yourself. this allows us to see various ways of life and various methods of being which acquire various foundations, race, culture, nationality to impart and share their shared characteristics and carry us more like a unified world." week 12 qqc encountering hope was about change and remaining focused on that change. actually, i think any reasonable person would agree that in our cutting edge world, the vast majority of us trust and need a world a lot more noteworthy than the one we see today. i can say for myself that i expect a world all the more brimming with adoration, truth, individuals with hearts to serve others and an age behind me that likes life and others. trust is hard now and then when we are assaulted by such a lot of antagonism in our reality. now and again, we are devoured by another difficulty, another misfortune, another danger that takes what trust we have. trust for the future and humankind has been tested all over the planet presently as well as through the historical backdrop of humankind. filling in trust is something still up in the air to do as a versatile, regularly extraordinary and energetic young fellow. trust is the instrument to mend our own hearts. two central issues that i detract from these readings are: 1) believe that you can have an effect. consideration causes swells in humankind that have an effect. 2) speak positive truth into your own life and others. words revive the bones of an individual or they destroy one's heart. harmony and love in this world begins with our words. overall, these past 4 weeks have really helped me understand the true meaning of being a notre dame student and being a human on this earth. i have found my true identity and that is to help others in their need inorder for a safer tomorrow. moreau first year experience section #78 prof. pruitt october 13, 2021 a snapshot of beliefs. what do i believe? in 18 years of life, i’ve gathered perspectives and collected experiences in what accumulates into my current answer to this question. yet, it is ever-changing. my beliefs reflect my viewpoint of the world, of life as a whole, and thus they continuously grow as i journey through life. so, after 12 years of education and half a semester of college, what do i believe? i believe that in order to achieve a sense of belonging and purpose, we must first acknowledge our faults. “you know how blame is described in research? a way to discharge pain and discomfort” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i’ve had plenty of experiences with people, including myself, being defensive and dodging responsibility for an errorit always ends in failure. when we take accountability for our actions, we can move forward in life without any guilt or disillusions from them. some people don’t like to accept blame, challenging that it is perfectly acceptable, but almost always these people end up being unhappy. in actively pursuing responsibility for my actions, i understand myself better and become a more genuine person. i believe that love is the answer. the answer to conflict, the answer to uncertainty, the answer to things we don’t understand. in my life, i’ve been influenced by some incredible people and been given the opportunity to forge meaningful relationships with themlove is what holds it all together. people who argue against spreading love generally come from a place of hurt where they actually desire love. as humans, it is easy to focus only on the world as we know it, but we must acknowledge the people around us with an open heart if we hope to truly come together. as week two’s lesson lays out: “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that defining who we are is a lifelong pursuit. we are constantly adapting to changes and constantly adopting new beliefs; the very nature of our personality is never still. this is why we must always seek to discover who we arein understanding ourselves at any given time, an understanding of values and behavior can be achieved. as father pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery.” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week three). i’ve felt firsthand the impact that this reflection can have on myself. some people may forget its cruciality, but in figuring out who we are, we are better able to grow, better able to succeed, and better able to live. i believe that meaningful relationships are essential to a good life. with this, it is important to know what makes a meaningful relationship. for me, meaningful relationships are devoid of toxicity, people who you genuinely feel great around. there are a variety of ways we observe this, for example devoting time to someone: “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). the belief in the importance of meaningful relationships has no real challengers, but some people do not realize they are in toxic relationships. knowing that our relationships are genuine and healthy leads to a happier lifestyle and far less stress and troubles. i believe that failures are vital to success. carla harris said “failure always brings you a gift, and that gift is called experience.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). in every shortcoming we face, there is a learning lesson. not only does failure point out what we did wrong, it motivates us to do better in the future. some challenge this notion with the thought that failure is inherently a bad thing, but my mindset is that sometimes we need to take a step backward in order to take two steps forward. i’ve had my share of shortcomings which allowed me to take a step back and come back stronger. with an open mind about failure, not only is there less stress found in our troubles, but there is more growth experienced as well. i believe that our individuality is the key to growth. each and every one of us has a unique set of experiences and beliefs from one another. the combination of these varied perspectives contribute to a collective perspective which allows for the successful advancement of society at large. certainly, challenges arise and it is often difficult to retain one’s own identity in the face of such a grand variety of perspectives, but it is extremely important to the continued growth of society. firsthand, any time i try to blend in i feel so much more restricted than when i’m living my life like normal. the less time we spend trying to blend in and instead embrace the unique, the more productive growth is observed “...you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on.” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) i believe that everyone’s life is fascinating and beautiful. as my previous values outlined, knowing our own identity and loving others is crucial in life, so if we combine the two, a new key belief of mine arises. holding an appreciation for each and every life that surrounds us not only brings joy to both party’s lives, it encourages individuality, it encourages love for all. i know that sometimes it is nice to focus only on yourself and the roles others serve to you in your life alone. it can be easy, particularly in our increasingly antisocial/virtually consumed world, for people to be drawn into a vacuum of self-absorption. but it is essential to resist that pull. learn about the lives of others, acknowledge the world beyond your sphere of knowledge. “...when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). right now, i believe that in order to achieve a sense of belonging and purpose, we must first acknowledge our faults. i believe that love is the answer. i believe that defining who we are is a lifelong pursuit. i believe that meaningful relationships are essential to a good life. i believe that failures are vital to success. i believe that our individuality is the key to growth. i believe that everyone’s life is fascinating and beautiful. i know that this is going to change with time, but for now this snapshot means everything to me. this is what i believe, and this is who i am. integration one integration one taylor kelly who is nico and what does he believe i play ultimate frisbee at nd and recently went to a tournament. on our way there in our “voops” (our carpool companions) and back we play something call hot seat. in this game, you ask a question and everyone goes around and answers. the one rule is that things shared in the conversation are not shared outside of it. i’m not sure if i am breaking the rules here, so don’t tell anyone, but one of the questions was, “make one phrase that encompasses your philosophy or motto of life.” i’m going to share my answer, i think that is allowed. i answered, “all gas, no breaks, with good people.” i summarized it by saying i want to go into things with 100% effort, not looking back, not caring what others think, but doing what i want to do (not in a selfish way), and do this with good people. i expanded on that saying that for me the meaning and purpose of life is finding good people to do it with. all the money all the fame, to me means nothing without good people surrounding you. this phrase and the way this phrase came about really ties into a bunch of stuff that we talk about in moreau, and i think something that helped me form this idea in my head. the first week we talked about vulnerability. this whole poop activity required vulnerability from others. asking questions and answering different questions with people you had just met a few days earlier is vulnerable. you risk what you have with them already, you fear they may judge you, but you create a trusting group dynamic can help ease those pains. in the first week, qqc part of my quote was, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be, in order to be who they were which is, you have to, absolutely do that, for connection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). after this car ride, i felt very connected to the people i rode with. and i would think it was because of our vulnerability towards each other, and what we shared. i believe that through vulnerability new friendships can be forged. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 looking at week two of moreau, the topic of study was the two sides of the atom. it talked about the balance between the two, in personal ambition and your service to others. looking at my motto for life, it shows the need to develop relationships with others and stay driven in life. i think this balances the two yins and yangs of this so-called atom. if my eulogy was today i would hope i had a positive impact on others, and not just that i was a good student. i believe that like father moreau, you don’t just want to educate the mind with academic things but also spiritual. qqc #3 again relates to this motto i have, so i guess this motto really is a reflection of my root beliefs. i picked the quote, “god, in turn, commands us to love our neighbor, whose good we can only will if we see him instead of focusing on ourselves” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau week three). i talked about the importance of friends in life and loving them before yourself, and their impact on your faith journey. in using them to talk about your faith and keep your faith on track. i believe that good christian people can help you on your faith journey. in week 4, i picked this quote: “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“five signs you're in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau week four). i’ve tried to stay active and not distracted when i am around others. it is really annoying when you are hanging out with someone and they are elsewhere or on their phone, so i myself try not to do that. when eating at the dining hall i make sure that i am not on my phone and present. especially at the notre dame one, because that place is just so cool (i love the old architecture). i believe that loving others is what gives life meaning. in week 5 we wrote a poem. i wrote, “i am from a lot of things.” i think that through this writing process i realized that i am everyone around me has a unique story. i am able to learn these stories through connecting with people. everybody's story is unique and meaningful. in week 6 i picked a quote about difficulty. part of that quote is, “work of resurrection shys away from no difficulty in our tradition we call them crosses” (“two notre dames: your holy cross https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 education” by fr. kevin grove moreau week six). my question was, “how can i challenge myself and not shy away from difficulty?” in my comment i said, “for me, i think the difficulty right now is continuing to reach out to others, organizing things, and getting involved in my clubs at notre dame. i signed up for quite a few clubs, at the clubs fair, however, was overwhelmed by emails, and didn’t end up getting involved. however, i just started going to ultimate frisbee this weekend, and just went to formula sae yesterday.” as we can see from my beginning story i have started to grow in putting myself out there, especially at nd, and trying to find a community there too. i think it is so funny that every part of moreau can tie into a little story from ultimate frisbee. tying into my motto, all gas no breaks means to not shy away from difficulty or discomfort. i believe that seeking discomfort and difficulty, is where the essence of life is. the last week of moreau does not tie in super well with my story above, but it definitely is important. to treat everyone with respect, and not treating anyone differently based on their identifiers such as race gender, and so on. in my qqc i talked about struggling with implicit bias and how we all have it in ourselves. i believe that no one should be treated differently based on their skin, gender, or any such identifier. i think moving forward, i should continue to reflect and strive for my beliefs and goals. continue to grow in myself, living every day to the fullest. all gas no breaks with good people. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 microsoft word integration pt 1.docx arwen oliva mr. polotto moreau fys 10101 15 october 2021 i believe i have a mission when we are brought into this world, we are cold, alone, and afraid. however, we then become nurtured, sheltered, and made warm by our loving parents. similar to the mission our parents were assigned at our birth, we are each given a mission to perform good in this world. it may be becoming a lawyer and advocating for criminal justice, or it could be doing mission trips to help those less fortunate in developing countries. whatever plan we have in store for our lives, god meant it for us to produce a source of good out of it and create a community that nurtures and cares for our neighbors. i believe that i am searching for what kind of person i want to be. we all want to feel wanted and loved by others, but our first priority must be learning to love and accept ourselves first. so, how can self-love contribute to the development of a safe and loving community? in brené brown’s ted talk, the power of vulnerability, , she states, “and the last, which i think is probably the most important is to believe that we’re enough” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this quote is important because it essentially states that in order for us to branch out and place importance on other people’s needs, we must love and do the same for ourselves first. i believe that we must become vulnerable with our emotions and ourselves know how we feel to tend to our own personal wants and needs. furthermore, this emotional and social vulnerability must continue with those we surround ourselves with because our peers are deserving of an honest and open relationship, free of lies and hurt. if we as humans can come to love our own selves and give us the label that we are worth something, then we would become capable of opening our hearts up to those in our surroundings. thus, i believe that becoming vulnerable with not only myself but within my relationships as well would allow me to create a more genuine and thoughtful community. i believe i can forge life-giving relationships through the vital virtue of honesty. being able to share your thoughts and feelings in its entirety with your partner in a relationship can either mean the end of its longevity or in a more positive light, its continuation and growth. if we are constantly masking the way we feel about a relationship, we will not only foster negativity with the second party but within ourselves; we will begin to feel trapped and alone. in olivia taylor’s online publication, 5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship, she states “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (olivia t. taylor, 5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship, moreau fye week 4). our own happiness should embody complete priority in our lives. if hypothetically, one was extremely unhappy in a relationship, and the partner had no idea, the partner would still expect the same amount of attention to be reciprocated by the unhappy partner. yet, this unhappy partner would not be able to because of lack of emotional energy, thus causing confusion within the other; this is where the vitality of the communication enters. it is highly important for a relationship to thrive that we communicate our emotions, beliefs, secrets, fears, aspirations. as stated in the previous paragraph, if we allow vulnerable communication with the other party, we are opening our hearts up to a deeper and more meaningful connection with others. rather than focusing on superficial aspects of a relationship such as popularity or pleasure, vulnerability allows you to connect heart-to-heart with our neighbors. with this, i simultaneously believe that my purpose in this life is to foster a community that embodies a sense of security and home by understanding different cultural, religious, societal, economic, or even emotional perspectives. it is necessary to note that the world is not only seen from our personal point of view. for example, in a video game we are always the main character completing the mission with side characters helping us reach that destination along the way. but have you ever thought to think, “what is the game like from their point of view? what goes on inside their head?”. the reality of the world is quite similar to this analogy; we should not view ourselves as main characters but as components that play a role in the lives of others as well. however, unfortunately, the world is not as perfect as we aspire it to be and we hold our biases, or stereotypes toward certain groups of people. in keith payne’s article, how to think about ‘implicit bias’, he highlights “it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure” ( keith payne, how to think about ‘implicit bias’, moreau fye week 7). in simpler translation, the author is essentially stating that even though we are not always making these biases the center of our conversation topics, it does not mean we still believe them. by maintaining even the smallest of stereotypes, we are automatically closing our minds off to the perspectives of others. moreover, the majority of biases are created based off interaction with one person and making it a generalization toward an entire group. how can we know that an entire population behaves according to this stereotype? it is merely impossible. acting in such a close-minded manner comes with many negative aspects, including the difficulty of forming life-giving relationships. failure to understand a different perspective than that of your own will only result in argument and flatline of that relationship. god created all human beings equal within his image and likeness. therefore, every human being, no matter their differences, should be treated with the dignity that the lord created them in and should at the very least be given the time of day to be understood. thus, my mission in this world is to help others feel at peace and comfortable within their own environment. by understanding different personal backgrounds, i can utilize this information to formulate life-giving relationships. no one should have to feel alone in this world because at the end of the day, god created the world for us to live in harmony. word count: 1085 integration i patrick mckenzie moreau first year experience integration one 10/15/21 what to do with ripples in your reflection i believe this semester at holy cross and notre dame has broadened my perspective on the possibilities at my fingertips, while allowing me to reflect upon who i am as a person. i believe i was able to allow ripples to alter my character, making me a better person. at welcome weekend, we were divided into scavenger hunt groups and our task was to take photographs in front of various campus locations with an oar. as a shy, and mostly introverted kid, i did not expect myself to end up sprinting around campus with the oar in hand. as dr. brown said, i “had the courage to be imperfect” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) and open myself to people i didn’t know and a place i was unfamiliar with. by opening myself up, i was able to set a precedent for myself and others that we are in a shared safe space. we were able “to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), bringing out the uniqueness of the class of 2025. i had the chance, with the new community, to be the person i wanted to be. the members of holy cross college had no idea who i was, and there was no recollection of what to expect. i had the opportunity to alter myself to who i wanted to be. there were, however, certain values that i am adamant about upholding. according to the via character strength survey, i uphold honesty as my number one value. the via character institute defines honesty as, “adherence to moral and ethical principle; soundness of moral character” (“via character strengths survey” by via moreau fye week two). at the quaker school i attended for sixteen years, the school valued the spices: service, peace, integrity, community, equality, and stewardship. i believe that it takes integrity to uphold any value. i believe that one must be honest with themselves before anything. i believe that personal honesty allows one to direct their path on the search for truth. when one is honest with themselves, they are able https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup to develop their true character. however, david brooks explains, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david books moreau fye week two) to explain the chasm between personal value and the value of external successes. i believe that a person should be judged on the context of their character and integrity. as father pete stated, ”what truly matters is authentically responding to the of your ability as the person you know yourself to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). father pete is explaining the importance of upholding personal integrity to enable one to uphold their personal dignity. i have come to this belief that character outweighs success because at the end of the day, when competition disappears, what is left? i am searching for a group of people who hold themselves to a high moral standard and go through life making everyone they encounter better people. i want to better the world because. i believe i want to be the one who is changing lives for the better. everyone wants to change the world in one strike. however, changing the world will happen one person at a time. one human to human interaction that acknowledges the potential difference in values and moves to understand each other. the notre dame football team repeated stated “it’s on us” ("it's on us nd the three d's of being an active bystander” by nd football moreau fye week four) to emphasize the importance of being an active bystander. i believe that active bystanders change lives. this past weekend (oct. 9 2021), i was biking back from the stephen center after a long rugby road trip to ohio state. the game was rough and i was mentally exhausted as i biked down past the grotto. i saw a girl collapse on the path, heavily intoxicated. i \ stopped and looked around for others to help me figure out what to do. i quickly caught the attention of three others who were across the street as the girl stumbled to her feet. we walked her up to the front of the basilica and one of us (call her susan to be anonymous) went through the girl's phone and called multiple contacts to figure out who this girl was and what dorm she was in. we assisted the girl back across campus to pasquerilla west where susan took her up to her room. this was not a situation i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view wanted to deal with on this night, but i knew, “if not me, then who?”. i upheld my moral integrity of doing what is right and made sure the girl got back safe. i believe bystanders make a difference. i have always held a special place for educators in my heart, my dad being a gym teacher, my one aunt a preschool teacher, my other aunt a grade school teacher, and my grandmother who i never met, a writer. these people have been great influences of who i want to be one day, and have influenced how i approach my education. i believe that i am responsible for educating our future generations on how to think independently, and how to see history as a tool to discover truth. by investigating the origins of thought and interpretations you can decipher the values and viewpoints of the author, which tell a lot about their intentions. i was moved by david brooks’ quote, “part of the blame goes to conservatives who try to whitewash history. part goes to progressives who tell such a negative version of history that it destroys patriotism. but the core problem is our failure to understand what education is.” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week seven) because my past education, and my dad revealed to me the civil war controversy that continues today is ridiculous. my train of thought leads me to believe that if the civil war is so whitewashed, how many significant american events are misrepresented in history? what other stories do we americans over glorify and over emphasize? as a history teacher, i aspire to change our narrative to better respect the truth. i believe that i cannot go about this by myself. fr. kevin explained, “faith and reason together place us always in relationship to each other” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five), thus calling all educators to take a stand to pursue truth together. educators need to feel a burning passion to change the lives of the students they encounter. for me, the quest for truth at my quaker school was always present, the teachers always looking to help. in my sophomore year, i struggled with the passing of my grandfather throughout the year. he died unexpectedly, during his pickleball match. during the school year i would write his initials on all my tests and everything i wrote in english class reflected the way he lived. in the midst of our poetry unit in the fall of that year, we were prompted to write our own, “where i am from poem”. i struggled, writing that i was from physical places, but when i discovered i https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 could write about intangibles, my writing was unmatched. george lyon says the “where i am from poem” is life changing, stating, “its life beyond my notebook is a testimony to the power of poetry, of roots, and of teachers” (“where i’m from” by george lyon moreau fye week six). i began to enjoy poetry because it was a way for me to express my feelings. i have struggled my whole life to be vulnerable and writing was a way for me to let loose. i believe an education based on truth can change lives. in the fall of my senior year, our class was tasked with writing a “this i believe essay”. it was easy to state concrete beliefs. however, mine was not a traditional essay. i wrote about my belief in ordinary heroes. however, only half my essay was in paragraph form. the middle section, where normally the “body” of the essay fits, i wrote a poem stating my beliefs: i believe in choosing kind over being right, i believe in backing down from a fight. i believe in always trying your best, i believe that even your mind needs its rest. i believe we should all wear a vest that absorbs all hate, and labels it with no return date. i believe that respect starts with a firm handshake, i believe the smallest pebble can make the biggest wake. i believe the extra mile is worth their smile, i believe that an extra smile can change someone’s lifestyle. i believe in seeking the truth, i believe this is something we must teach the youth. i believe our hearts should be filled, i believe friendly relationships are what we must forage and build. i believe our hands should be gentle, i believe our minds should be open, not judgemental. i believe integrity encompasses all morals, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html i believe a sense of integrity can stop all quarrels. i believe things done in the dark will be brought to the light, i believe we must all let our light shine bright. this i believe. these are all traits of ordinary heroes. no capes, no sidekicks, no flashy names. when asked why ordinary heroes do what they do, they often respond, “it’s just what i’m supposed to do”. i believe in ordinary heroes because they are ordinary people who do extraordinary things. these are core root beliefs of mine that, when read, help the reader connect and understand the idea being conveyed. these beliefs are stated in tandem with the action that derives from the belief, in other words, how to put the belief into action. my goals for the future consist of learning how to understand people with different core values, educating myself on how to educate people on the danger of a single story, and i look forward to becoming an educator myself. i believe i am called to teach, not only because of interest in changing the lives of others, but because i have developed such a passion for working with kids that i can connect with them. the fall semester of this moreau class has allowed me to become vulnerable to myself and others to allow for self-reflection. i have been exposed to countless perspectives which has allowed me to be open to different ideas. i believe i have come a long in personal development, but i strive to become better in building a spiritual relationship in which i can firmly ground my beliefs. mfye integration ii resurfacing melonio 1 professor retartha moreau: first year experience 5 december 2021 resurfacing i am fully aware that it sounds beyond cliché to say that your first semester of college didn’t go how you thought it would. i am also fully aware that it’s even more cliché to bring up how cliché that statement is. i believe that, in my circumstance, it is fully fair for me to say. i went to a college preparatory school for the majority of my life. i earned nearly all a’s, was involved in all of the school’s plays and musicals, ran the school’s writing magazine, earned high honors, and so much more. i was the good girl that everyone went to when they wanted their paper read. i was the one to beat. i applied to the university of notre dame as an english and biology major, and after getting accepted into the gateway program, i thought that my freshman year was going to be easy. my parents assured me that i would be completely fine, and that i wouldn’t have anything to worry about. they told me over and over, “you have talent, you are capable, and you belong” (what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it? by elizabeth cox, moreau fye week 9) and i firmly believed them. i walked under the arch of holy cross on move-in day and thought that i would, once again, be the one to beat. within two weeks of classes, i discovered that everything is so much harder than i had prepared myself for it to be. my notre dame chemistry class and my holy cross biology class, even though i fell in love with the subjects and topics, really challenged me, and i had to dedicate hours upon hours a week just to feel somewhat secure. my calculus class also proved to melonio 2 be quite challenging. math was never my strong suit, and this was by far the hardest class that i had ever taken. i wasn’t getting all a’s like i told myself i would. each day would pass and i would beat myself up more and more, but i never allowed myself to cry. i seldom talked about my struggles with anyone. as time passed, i felt heavier and heavier weight pile onto my back and press deep in my forehead. i sat at my desk, my textbooks and notes barricading me in, my back hunching over more and more as the clock ticked and the sun set each night. the more time i spent studying, though, the less and less information i retained. isn’t that funny? how backwards is that? not only was i slipping in some of my classes, but i became very, very ill for nearly three months. there were countless days where i was taking notes with one hand and holding tissues in another. there were countless nights where i’d stay up until nearly one in the morning, only to cough myself to sleep. mind you, it wasn’t a wimpy, dry cough. i was coughing so hard and i’d be bent over in the shower next morning on the verge of vomiting. i was on antibiotics for a combined total of five weeks. as if i weren’t worried about my classes enough, i couldn’t even go to some of them because i was bedbound. every other week, i would visit the grotto. i’d light a candle for my dziadek, my late grandfather, and remind myself who i’m here for. i knelt in front of the candles one night, though, and i asked myself, “why am i here? why did they pick me?” i knew then, though, deep down, that god had a plan for me and was watching over me. each time, i looked up and asked the lord “why [i had] been forsaken, and still obeys” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis chapter 8 by c.s. lewis, moreau fye week 12). i would get up and ride my bike back to holy cross, repeating to myself that i couldn’t give into my doubt. god had a plan for me, and i was destined for something more. melonio 3 it became so, so hard, though, to believe him once november came by. after fall break, all of my classes seemed to move at warp speed. i would sit through entire lectures and feel as though i wasn’t absorbing a single sentence. my notes would be flawless, yet it was like i was writing in another language. nearly nothing made sense. as everyone around me nearly cried over earning a-’s on quizzes, i sat with my mouth shut about my b-’s that i was earning. as thanksgiving break approached, i had lost count of how many times i had gone in for extra help to my calculus and biology professors. hours became days dedicated to only studying. meals were skipped, and sleep became neglected. why was i so unhappy? why wasn’t i having a good time? why did i feel so stressed? i like my classes, don’t i? i can handle this, can’t i? they picked me for a reason, didn’t they? i sat at the dinner table the night i got home for thanksgiving break and i sobbed. everything surfaced all at once, and i realized that there were so many things that i’ve given up doing because of how much i was studying. i’m not talking about going out and partying; i’m talking about things that i’ve loved doing since i was a little girl. i’ve missed writing so much. that’s what gives me joy. i used to write stories for my first grade class and read aloud to them. there were mountains of my books that barricaded me in as i grew up. i ended up writing a play and my high school produced it my senior year! i gave that up. i’ve missed being on stage. i’ve been acting since i was nine years old. the rush that i feel in my chest when me and the cast put on a show is something that is absolutely unbeatable. i get to tell a story and make people feel something. i gave that up. melonio 4 i want that back so bad. i realize what i have to do. “if [i] open my heart, i have it” (thirteen ways of looking at community by p.j. palmer, moreau fye week 11). this upcoming semester, i’m choosing to study what i love. this isn’t me giving up; this is me simply going back. i sacrificed my health and happiness during my fall semester. now, i’m choosing to “stand fast against the momentum of your times, and renew the face of the earth” (wesley theological seminary commencement by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c., moreau fye week 10). melonio 5 citations lewis, c. s. (1942). the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis chapter 8. canvas. retrieved november 14, 2021, from https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189595?wrap=1 marketing communications: web, university of notre dame. (2012, may 7). wesley theological seminary commencement. office of the president. retrieved november 1, 2021, from https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commenceme nt/ palmer, p. j. (2017, february 25). thirteen ways of looking at community •. center for courage & renewal. retrieved november 7, 2021, from http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it? elizabeth cox. (2018, august 28). youtube. retrieved october 18, 2021, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189595?wrap=1 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo answers to both questions are at the bottom of the doc the focus question for this session is: "in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?" 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. how to write a qqc reflection: the qqc reflection ought to consist of one question, one quote, and one comment. when combined, your writing (not including citations or quotes from the content) should meet a minimum of 200 words. question: compose a relevant question regarding one (or more) of the content materials. this question ought to be an open-ended query about what you hope to discuss in class or what you don’t yet fully understand. quote: select a meaningful quote from one (or more) of the content materials and offer an explanation of why you’ve selected this quote as an example of a particularly meaningful insight, perspective, or truth. this explanation ought to be ~100 words. comment: compose an original analysis integrating or connecting the content materials. your commentary ought to simultaneously draw from all pieces of the required content and your life. this commentary ought to be ~100 words. example qqc reflection: question: how would fr. hesburgh adapt to today's society with social media and the new ease of communication? quote: "i said mr. president, we may have had our disagreements but at the end of the day we were all fishermen." this quote represents how really impressive it is that, even through all the times of turmoil and disagreement, fr. hesburgh was able to remain a force for good and stood by his beliefs no matter what. i think that our society today is in need of someone like that, someone who can find commonality and humanity and be the mediator between all sides. it feels like our country is more divided than ever right now and i think fr. hesburgh would've helped us out a lot right now if he were here. comment: to my surprise, i loved the film and was deeply moved by the amazing story it portrayed. i can see clearly now why father hesburgh is still such a beloved man here on campus. by watching this movie, i was reminded why i came to notre dame. with all the regulations, distrust, and lack of unity created by civil unrest, ever-present injustice, and the pandemic, it has been challenging to see clearly what the right thing to do is or how to best define a life well-lived, especially in specific situations. however, after watching the movie, i was reminded that we’re at nd to figure those things out. fr. john’s “wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” simultaneously calls us to address the role of hatred in building community and doing the right thing. both fr. ted and fr .john describe a community of incredible people who fight to make the world a better place, who fight to leave notre dame a better place than they found it, and who care so much for their fellow man. 1. i believe that objective #3 which states “discern possible ways of living life” stands out as the most relevant objective to my own personal life. i believe this is the most relevant objective to my life because there are many possible ways of living life that i have yet to explore. i feel as though i have been carved into a certain life due to my privilege and because of that, i haven’t discovered alternative ways to live life. i want a life of more challenge which is why i chose the university of notre dame. hopefully this class will teach me some things about discovering different ways to live my life. 2. question: how does shame relate to vulnerability? quote: when addressing the topic of shame, brown states that “no one wants to talk about it, and the less you talk about it the more you have.” this quote is fascinating to me. as soon as i really reflected on what brown was saying i paused the video and immediately wrote this quote down on a sheet of paper. what this quote is essentially stating is that those who address the shame that they possess usually overcome that shame and as a result have less shame in their lives. those who ignore their shame have no strategies to overcome their shame and the cumulation of shame over time builds up as a result of this. also those who acknowledge and process their shame have more maturity than those who block their shame out. acknowledging and processing your shame will help in dealing/eliminating the shame that you possess. comment: this quote answers the question regarding whether or not shame has a connection to vulnerability. if one has the maturity to address and speak about their shame then they are being vulnerable. this allows the individual to grow as a human which ties back to brown’s overall message about the power of vulnerability. this clearly takes a level of maturity. those who do not address their shame struggle with vulnerability, personal growth and even develop into more of a shameless person than someone who handles shame by taking the more vulnerable route. as it goes for me, i think i acknowledge my shame decently well. however, i know i can improve on this matter which made this quote striking to me. what made this quote even more striking to me was that i know many people who are scared to be vulnerable and address the shame that they possess. i can see through how they act (more shameful than others) that brown is accurate in stating that, “no one wants to talk about it, and the less you talk about it the more you have.” if you really think about it, how do you handle shame in your own life? how does this impact the person that you are? lots of discussion can arise from this thought. integration 2 new home, new paths i have always envisioned college to be a place where i would unravel my true self. a journey that entails leaving my home and family behind, to embark on a new chapter in my life. i thought i had a clear image of where this path would take me, however, upon coming to notre dame i realized that i was wrong. the great shift within my agenda and priorities pushed me to visualize greater possibilities and goals. i realized that at my time here i have the opportunity to grow as a person while positively impacting those around me. while adapting to this new environment i developed a beautiful way of thinking and looking at life. no longer did i see personal growth out of my reach, but saw it as a destination around the corner. it is of no surprise that my new priorities lie within being academically and emotionally challenged in my new home. at the start of the semester, i felt as if i was drowning in work and overwhelmed by the thought of fitting in. i thought that i was not good enough to be at notre dame and let my head get to me. now looking back, i believe that i let the imposter syndrome get to me. according to cox, “where we each doubt ourselves privately but believe we are alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). i thought that i was alone in my academic struggles and fear of not being able to make friends, however, i have come to the realization that we were all in the same boat. everyone around me had the same need to exceed their expectations and strive in this new environment. it took me a while to realize this, however, i have learned that when moving to a new place i must believe that i am not alone. by finding this confidence in myself and believing that i am worthy of being where i am, i will fight the imposter syndrome anywhere i go. as hogan stated, by one placing expectations in their life, they are letting their lives be defined by an idea (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). for this reason, any place i go that i am accepted into i will no longer doubt myself, but rather believe that i got accepted for a reason. i have learned that any journey entails ups and downs and that i must embrace my obstacles to grow as a person. apart from imposter syndrome, i have let my insecurities get the best of me. at notre dame, i have undergone the famous “freshman fifteen”, where one gains 15 pounds during their freshman year of college. i let myself get carried away with all the desserts, pizza, and pasta at the dining hall. on top of that, i was unable to set a routine for myself. there was no set time for my day to start and i could never seem to tie in my fitness life. i began to lose myself as i felt i had no time for anything. i would let my room get messy, go days without doing laundry, and not take care of myself. however, after time there was a shift in my mentality as no longer did i feel sorry for myself, but rather took the initiative to get myself together. i started to see beauty in my brokenness and started looking at my flaws positively and with love. as said in the grotto video, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i was able to point out what was “breaking” me and start putting the pieces back together, working towards improving my https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/authors/julia-hogan https://grottonetwork.com/authors/julia-hogan https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ imperfections, and overall growing as a person. i discovered that in order to truly be connected with myself i must see all the good and bad in myself as a learning experience. i learned that in the future, i must tackle my imperfections with love in order to be able to heal and start working towards expanding my character. coming to notre dame, was another push out of my comfort zone. throughout my life, i have lived in four different cities. each place left me with a different mindset and beliefs as i encountered many people from diverse backgrounds. upon entering notre dame, i realized that this place wasn’t going to be any different. i have met people from across the world or countries that i forgot existed on the map. for example, my greatest friend, sofia, is from nicaragua, a country that is falling under a communist regime. over the semester, i have learned all about her culture and the hardships she has undergone at her home. as prof. agustin fuentes mentioned, “it changes, race and racism are malleable, alterable. that is in fact, why we should care about diversity” ("diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). this is the reason i will continue to embark on a journey that pushes me to be more open to different perspectives and races. i will see meeting new people from different backgrounds as a way to open my mind. at notre dame, not only has my intelligence grown, but as well as my faith. i used to only go to church only on sundays, and zone out most of the time. however, here at my new home, i have integrated into my hall’s chapel. i started by attending church with my friends and hallmates and soon realized that i was forming part of a stronger community. as fr. james b. king states, “human beings can absorb a boundless amount of knowledge and information, but if christians fail to see themselves first as people with a vocation to open their hearts to christ, then they cannot expect to change society” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). the more involved i became with my faith, the more i realized that it helped me be the best version of myself. i began acting through christ and performing good deeds out of love. i found the importance of living a life where you cultivate your mind and heart. for this reason, my future goals entail living a life where i practice my faith strong and apply it to my everyday life. living a life of faith will allow me to act out of love while still growing as a person in all the other aspects of life. in my notre dame journey, i hope to continue to achieve personal growth. through the first semester, i have discovered that it is essential to not lose myself in the process. i have learned to balance what is important in my life and keep what are my true priorities close to me. i strive to continue to foster my character while tackling all the challenges that arise in my new home. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051?module_item_id=102825 integration 1 maria finan moreau fye 14 october 2021 discovering myself at nd 1. i believe that we build the strongest relationships by being vulnerable and opening up to people. 2. i believe that healthy relationships will bring more happiness than objects or money. 3. i believe that we will be happiest when we are our true selves. 4. i believe that we should view the search for meaningful relationships as a great opportunity. 5. i believe that god always has a bigger plan for us even when we do not see it. 6. i believe that we are better when we embrace our differences. 7. i believe that the younger generations have a great opportunity to change the world. i believe that we build the strongest relationships by being vulnerable and opening up to people. i believe this because i have built my strongest relationship with the people that i am able to tell anything. opening up is not easy, but creates trust between two people. brené brown said, “courage, the original definition of courage when it first came into the english language, it's from the latin word, cor, meaning heart the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). i love this definition because it truly does take a lot of courage to tell someone about your whole self, which is why it builds so much trust when we do. so far at nd, the people i am https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be closest with are the ones who i have told the most about myself. i do not think that it is a coincidence and the more i would tell them, the easier it was to continue opening up about myself. i believe that healthy relationships will bring more happiness than objects or money. the greatest example i have seen of this is with my grandparents. they have lived in the same little house for over 50 years and they are the happiest people i know. they find joy in the little things like family gathering or my grandpa going hunting and fishing with his grandkids. david brooks said, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). i struggle with the issue that he is talking about. i get more focused on achievements than relationships and internal happiness. here at nd my favorite days have been the ones where i am with my friends doing the simple things like playing ping pong or baseball. the achievements will bring temporary joys, but friendships will bring long lasting happiness. i believe that we will be happiest when we are our true selves. when we pretend to be someone we are not, we are constantly stressing to impress others and make them believe us. it is like we are trying to hide behind a mask, so we cannot tell people how we really feel. to be our true selves, we must figure out who we truly are. father pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on, is one of self discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccrmick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3). if we do not know who we are, then we cannot be open with others and build true friendships. i feel like i have discovered myself in my faith here at nd. i found myself voluntarily going to mass and the grotto to pray. this was a big step for me because in the past i was always told to practice my faith. through my faith, i am becoming more comfortable with who i am and feel less inclined to put up a mask just to please others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry i believe that we should view the search for meaningful relationships as a great opportunity. being able to make new friends is a great chance to learn about new people and create lifelong relationships that will bring us happiness. it should not be a burden to us when we need to make new friends. while i agree that “finding quality friendships is not easy” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. tyler moreau fye week 4), they are definitely worth it when you find them. i think this has been something i struggled with early on at nd. i was not willing to put myself out there to find new friends, but now that i have, my experience has been so much better. i believe that god always has a bigger plan for us even when we do not see it. one of the hardest things in life is to realize that there will always be good things coming out of the bad times because god has a plan for us. i struggle with that a lot even though i know for a fact that god has my back. the quote "man proposes, but god disposes" (“letter to father moreau” by father sorin moreau fye week 5) sums this up perfectly. i had my own plans, but god had other ideas for how i would reach my destination. i believe my whole journey to nd is an example of this. i envisioned a perfect senior year with school and sports and instead i had a major injury and online classes. despite all of this, god still brought me to nd. i believe that we are better when we embrace our differences. “we want to gather the diversity of our voices” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). when we join together despite our differences, we learn a lot from each other. our differences are what make us great. at nd, i have met people from all different backgrounds and because of that, i have learned about many cultures and found out some of my beliefs were wrong. one of the main reasons why i came to nd was because i knew i could learn from many people who did not come from the same background as me. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html i believe that the younger generations have a great opportunity to change the world. if the younger generations begin to see the implicit biases that they have, they are able to correct them. chimamanda adichie says in her ted talk about implicit biases, “what this demonstrates, i think, is how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of a story, particularly as children” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7). i think the best way to combat implicit bias is by teaching children to be open to learning about people from different cultures and backgrounds because they are so impressionable at a young age. if the younger generations are taught to be kind and inclusive, they can then change the world for the better. at notre dame, i have seen some of this in action with the many different clubs and organizations that we have centered around being inclusive of all people. college students are still finding themselves and their beliefs, so they are very impressionable as well. if we learn to be inclusive, we can then pass that on to the future generations to continue to make the world a better place. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story i retrace my steps and i see how far i’ve come what have i encountered and how will i respond? this semester has been an interesting time for self-reflection for me. being in a new place, almost 2000 miles away from my home, friends, and family wasn’t the easiest thing. but since arriving here, it’s been worthwhile to meet new people with new perspectives and i am even managing to try to see the good in things more often. the experiences that i’ve had since starting school here have been enlightening in some sense; i’m trying to learn more about myself and others so that i can be happier and feel more fulfilled. throughout the semester, i’ve been asking myself a lot about my priorities. i’ve spent plenty of time alone, which gives me time to reflect on my experiences and the things that i want to do and be. it makes me think about the loneliness video we watched. i started the year thinking i should get a lot of friends immediately and that i was falling behind with that, but now, knowing that there are actually a lot of people feeling lonely, i feel more comfortable with it (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week 9). in becoming happier with myself, i could realize that i have been making good friends – i am able to get some perspective. every time i walk alone back to my dorm, i think about how lucky i am to be here and for the connections that i have made. even though i don’t have a solid group of friends to spend all my time with like i hoped upon arriving here, i am grateful for the ones i do have. i think that our discussion of brokenness has resonated with me in my time here. looking back on the things that i have encountered, from the challenges in the pandemic to finding my friends, have all been part of my journey. even though it was difficult, i can look back and see the good in it. when i left home, i was sad to leave my best friend – we became a lot closer during the second half of senior year and throughout the summer before college. but the only reason this sadness was possible was because my priorities changed while i struggled with loneliness during covid – i wanted to become more social and appreciate the things and people in my life more. the loneliness i experienced, i think, was a type of brokenness – and like in the kintsugi workshop, i was able to pick up the pieces of myself and mend them together in a similar but better way, like the pottery (“women find healing through kintusgi workshop” – moreau fye week 10). the things i’ve experienced form a map of what i’ve been through, like the gold inlaid into the pottery that highlights its past. now, i can see the beauty in the things i’ve been through – they’ve brought me where i am and shaped my current experience. i have had some struggles with community this semester. though i have been able to find friends, i struggle to call it “community,” really. honestly, i’m not totally sure why i have the hesitation. the friends i’ve made and the people i’ve met have various backgrounds and experiences, so i appreciate seeing different perspectives. i’ve also been trying to work on myself so that i can achieve community. the article on community discusses how community “must be present in the individual as a ‘capacity for connectedness’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week 11). i strive to reach this capacity. i am trying to attain this by becoming the person i want to see. i am trying to be more expressive and social, and encourage other people to do the same to become their best, happiest selves. i want to feel like part of a community more than anything, but i don’t seem to. i have come upon a sort of revelation with this recently. it’s sometimes been challenging, recently, trying to sort out my priorities in contrast with those of the people around me. my goal is to become a better version of myself – though by “better” i mostly mean a version of myself that i am happy with and has a positive impact on others – while some of my friends’ goals are oriented completely differently, with grades and future careers being the priority. i understand that these differences are a product of our separate experiences and vastly different backgrounds, but i still have trouble reconciling that with the way i experience the world. i am thankful that i have been able to encounter hope in my time here. i’ve realized that it’s because of challenges that i can see the good things that i have and appreciate them; in the catholic perspective, “the cross is much more than a burden… [it is] ‘a treasure more valuable than gold and precious stones’” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c., moreau fye week 12). while i have been questioning my faith, i have hope whether or not a god is involved because i’ve overcome every cross i’ve carried in the past – why not the ones now and in the future? this sense of appreciation for my struggles is something that has become increasingly important to me as a result of being here at notre dame. in high school, one of my teachers had us do new year’s resolutions – one of mine was to be more positive and to see the good in things by writing down a minimum of 3 positive things that happened each day. even at the end of the day, when i’m worn out, or i’ve had an exam earlier, i’m managing to see the bright side. in all honesty, i started doing it only because of the grade involved, but it has progressed and become more important here than it was back then. though i’m not entirely sure why, i think it may have something to do with my reevaluations of life since arriving here. while walking back to my dorm from the dining hall or pw, i almost always find myself thinking about how short our time is here in college, because i learned that lesson a little too late during high school and spent three years miserably waiting for it to be over. knowing how short life is, i think that it’s most worthwhile to look for the good things in everything, and to acknowledge that even though something is a cross now, later it will be a monument toward what has been overcome; it will be the gold laid into fixed up pottery, making it whole. like the women with the kintsugi, i have learned that “the good, the bad, the ugly – it has made [me] into the beautiful, dynamic, interesting person [i] am today” (“women find healing through kintusgi workshop” – moreau fye week 10). if you couldn’t tell by my reflections, i’ve spent a while wondering about the meaning of life. i’ve had a surprisingly high number of discussions with a friend over ndh dinners about the nature of the universe and how we find meaning in our lives as individuals. while she believes she can find meaning in work, i can’t seem to accept that – i find meaning in connections with others and making an impact on the world. if i’m being honest, this has been a challenge for me in our friendship. though i know that her experiences are shaped by her background – her family’s dependence on her, for example – this is a way in which i struggle to form community. however, this is where seeing the cross as more than a burden comes in. though i struggle sometimes with this relationship, i also look back at when i thought in a similar way. i think back to high school, when i had strict expectations for myself – get a’s, be successful, get ahead in the world. essentially, i wanted to be perfect; that was my own expectation, just like we talked about in class (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, moreau fye week 9). i think about how, back then, i needed to connect with people more and i needed a bit of a push to see past those relatively shortsighted goals; i also think about how i just needed someone to support me as i faced the struggles that came with my own expectations. i think that i have managed to (mostly) let go of those expectations, promising myself to do what makes me happy like in the “letting go of expectations” article. i am trying, though, to help my friend overcome some of these expectations and try to enjoy life more, rather than seeing it as a to-do list before death. in the future, i hope to further face these challenges and questions so that i can get answers. even if they are not universally correct ones, my hope is to find answers that will help me get the most satisfaction out of the next 3 ½ years, so that my happiness is not solely defined by a number or letter on paper or by how much i succeed in other people’s terms. i’m excited to challenge myself to become more of the “me” i want to, and to continue to see hope in the most difficult of times. i really have been happy since coming here. partially, i think this is due to me liking the college life and independence, but also because i am shaping myself into the reflective person that makes my life worthwhile. integration one.docx my core beliefs: exploring how to maximize my authentic self i believe that one should aim to be honest and open in order to reveal their authentic self. brené brown argues that even though many people conceal their true emotions and view vulnerability as a negative characteristic, vulnerability is essential to revealing one’s true character. brown explains, “vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). this quote demonstrates that people should “be themselves” and openly share their feelings and emotions. overall, showing one’s authentic character will foster a better and more fulfilling life, that includes happiness and purpose. before going to notre dame, i struggled to reveal my true emotions. because of this, i was only able to have surface-level relationships that were not impactful on my life. however, going to notre dame made me realize that i should be more open to admitting flaws that are negatively viewed by society, and solely act through my authentic emotions and character. although i still struggle to show complete vulnerability, i know that being vulnerable will help me form better relationships to have a happier life. because of this, i believe that being open to one’s true self is an essential value. i believe that one should strive towards being a moral and genuine person rather than acting solely on personal aspirations. david brooks describes two opposing sides of nature that each human has, which he refers to as adam i and adam ii. brooks describes adam i as the career-oriented, ambitious side of our nature, and adam ii is the internal side of nature, that desires to do good. brooks explains, “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii. and the problem is, that turns you into a shrewd animal who treats life as https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 a game, and you become a cold, calculating creature” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). this means that people in modern-day society are too focused on their personal achievement, and struggle to focus on have moral conviction. in my personal life, i have seen america as a country that exalts consumerism. because of this, people are focused on ascending to a higher career, and become cold, calculated figures. many americans solely act to ascend their careers, and therefore loose much of their authenticity. overall, being the moral and genuine “adam ii” is essential, as it facilitates a society that cares about the wellbeing of others. i believe that one should maintain faith in god in order to facilitate hope and optimism for the future. in one of the student reflections jennifer explains, “through [faith], i am able to encounter the certainty of god’s presence in my life and i feel a sense of comfort in knowing that i am not alone” (“student reflection on faith at notre dame” by jennifer – moreau week three). this reveals that god gives one a sense of comfort through their trials and tribulations. as a protestant, i have faith that god will lead me to a life with him after death. having the confidence that god is in control of my life is very important, as it creates reassurance that god wants to help me through my struggles. my faith and confidence in god gives me hope and a bright outlook for the future, which helps facilitate a happier and more optimistic life. i believe that one should seek relationships where both sides contribute equally. in a grotto article, olivia taylor explains, “a healthy, balanced, mutual friendship involves peers who ask questions and bounce ideas back and forth” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week 4). this illustrates that in order to create an authentic and meaningful relationship, both sides contribute to deep conversations so that each person grows https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ off each other. overall, it is essential for both sides to disclose their authentic thoughts and feelings, in order to facilitate character growth. by disclosing personal beliefs and working off each other, authentic relationships are an important tool towards creating and defining one’s and moral character. in my personal life, notre dame has challenged me to be true to the belief statement. although i had many one-sided relationships in high school, notre dame has challenged me to gain meaningful friends that will spark personal growth. i believe that one has the power to change their personal story and can shape their identity through actions. in the letter written from father sorin to father basil moreau, sorin explains, "this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in the country…at least such is my firm conviction, time will tell whether i am deceived or not" (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by father sorin – moreau fye week five). this shows that father sorin created a story, which he then used to shape his identity. because sorin created a story and believed in establishing a great catholic institution, he was able to put this into fruition and shape his identity as the founder. i aim to put this into practice by fulfilling my shaping a story that gives me an identity to maximize my inner potential. although i am still working on finding an overall purpose in life, notre dame is an environment that fosters exploration of purpose. ultimately, i have created a narrative of doing good to the world, which i hope to fulfill at notre dame. i believe that it is important to reflect on what factors have shaped one’s identity. while writing my original “where i’m from” poem, i was able to honestly reflect on the elements that defined who i was. through this process, i learned which aspects of my life i was proud of, such as my family, education, and culture. by reflecting on my personal beliefs, i was able to https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view recognize my authentic self, which is important to forming self-identity. i ultimately believe that by reflecting on factors that have shaped life, one can gain a better perspective on their true character and beliefs. i believe that one should become aware of the unconscious biases they have, in order to avoid hostility towards other groups. keith payne explains, “[implicit bias] sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne – moreau fye week seven). this means that it is natural for humans to be biased and marginalize against certain groups. in fact, most people do not even recognize this implicit bias that people have. however, it is important to recognize that people of different races, cultures, or genders have a shared humanity and deserve to be treated equally. in my personal life, i aim to remove implicit biases from my life by exposing myself to diversity. by becoming familiar with people who are different than me, i aim to become aware of different perspectives to remove implicit biases from my life. all in all, i aim to shape my personal identity through these seven core belief statements. and even though i am still exploring my beliefs and am open to change, these beliefs are how i currently seek the truth. i aim to use these beliefs to reveal my authentic self, in order to facilitate self-improvement and to maximize my human potential. at the university of notre dame, my identity is continuing to be challenged, through the exploration of difficult subjects. through this, i hope to gain a true understanding about my inner self and determine what i truly believe in. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ “in what ways might courage, vulnerability, and belonging a part of my search?” i think that all these help us with the objective of “deepen your self-knowledge” as stated in the syllabus. as we start to “accept ourselves as enough” and “believe that what made [us] vulnerable, made [us] beautiful,” we will start to achieve the goal of self-betterment and self-knowledge. (brown tedx) we mask our vulnerabilities and that inhibits us from really getting to know people. we hide things because we are scared. our fear turns to lies and our lies lead to shame and a sense of unworthiness. this unworthiness leads to heartache, masking, and withdrawal from community which are all detrimental to a proper knowledge of how loved we truly are by others and by god. this chain will continue to repeat if we allow it to. or we can break it by breaking away from fear in the first place. this is obviously idealistic, but i have a couple ideas on how to make fear less ‘hardwired’ into our thinking. i think fear can be lessened when we can trust our authority figures not to judge our character from our worst mistake. i also think fear can be lessened when we can allow ourselves to trust in god’s providence. we are truly not the authors of our own life and therefore, we should not act like we can control everything. fys intergration spindler fys december 1st, 2021 what have i encountered and how will i respond? over the course of the semester i have encountered with vastly different things in this class, such as relaxing and using breathing techniques in stressful situations especially during the semester or in times of need. i have also encountered building the correct type of relationship with certain individuals. realizing that we still have inqeuailty in our country has alos played a significant role in my learning in this class. in this class i was able to comprehend and realize when people are in need of help even when theyre not asking for it. using these skills i was provided with will carry on for the rest of my life. week nine, showed us how to deal with, "what is imposter syndrome?". the video (elizabeth cox, ted-ed) connected with me a lot more than in the past semester this video showed how high is cheating people after they accomplish something don't really celebrate or take time to realize what they did they usually go on to the next thing in the next thing after that. this is usually found and high competitors such as athletes for entrepreneurs. i believe i have occasions being a high-performance athlete and always competing either against myself or others and when i finally do accomplish that goal or prestigious award i'm moving on to the next thing similar to what the video talks about. instead of taking time to really grasp what went into it and feel either award you should. i usually dealt with a lot of these similar things in high school because it came so naturally so i just needed to compete i'm at the next thing. how to resolve this type of issue in your daily life is taking a step back and visualizing everything that you did accomplish, so it makes it so much more rewarding the next time you do something similar or something more significant. this causes you to continue to have that competitive attitude and the things you love doing. i have also been experiencing this in our football season because at times i dont always feel like i am accomplishing the things i set out for, this might be a small goal in the day or week or a long term one. overall, i am now dealing with this type of situatiuon better than i first realized i was couping with such a thing. another important factor was, we have all discovered somewhat of brokenness in our daily lives. we usually just put it aside and usually are discouraged by it. after a time we try to forget about it, but after time more and more things just pile on. some can cope with all of these things but not all at once and if someone does try dealing with one of their brokenness problems it’s like putting a bandaid on a bullet hole, they usually don’t know where to start or what to deal with. watching the video “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto). this shows how women deal with their own brokenness, such as getting a pottery cup and putting all the things that are affecting their lives such as divorces, violence, or broken relationships. when they put all that into the cup and then smash it and piece it back together. such as their own lives that it’s broken and now you have to piece it back together. this is a great way to deal with so many issues in oneself life. i have dealt with so many things in my own life, and i wish i have seen this around those times so i could’ve done something similar to cope with it. honestly, this might not seem like a significant tool but truly it is to let everything go that hurts you. this is resinating with me most right now because due to all our coaching staff leaving and stuff, caught me off guard, and now dealing woith brokenness has me lost but appalling these methods daily wil only help the situation i am in. furthermore, reading the text “thirteen ways of looking at community” (parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal), showcases many thoughts on how we as a community can become stronger as a whole. for example, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” this explains that we have a whole community and we don't understand how to specifically use our relationships. another is that we are not appreciated for having them as well we do not fully grasp their full potential. we usually push them aside and focus on the negative or things that really don't matter. having diversity matters. having people in your life and building countless relationships is important, but having many people from different backgrounds is also key to success. we can learn from each other in such things that we wouldn't understand by ourselves. using diversity also builds character in our lives. it shapes our way of thinking outside the box, it allows us to be more comfortable with others and feel better in certain situations. although this might be tough for others, as long as we all try to connect with each other in different ways and get to know each other, can help build a better community. growing up parents usually influence what we believe in or how we should act towards certain things. as a kid your childhood is usually mapped out by them in some sense this is good others say this has a negative toll of letting their son or daughter choose its way but what they should believe in and not having an effect on either way. i think that from our childhood and having many people influence our decisions and actions can affect the way we grow and have hope, not just our parents are friends other family members as well as teachers and even the media. growing in hope and living are the two necessities the help our community grow as of one. we need each other to believe have faith that have hope in each other in any ideas or thoughts that they have because having them will influence our future as we know it. as we continue with our own lives we should respect others decisions even if they differ from our thoughts or opinions and try to understand the way of their thinking and why they chose that where's is what you would have done and see the different outcomes that could have good or bad. having these will only continue to have hope and one another overall, each week brought us a new perspective on how to deal with certain situations and applying these tools and techniques in our lives will not only help our well being but also the people around us. we can share the knowledge that we learned from this class and spread the awareness, of brokenness, having hope and having trust and love. moreau 31 10/04/21 what i know so far upon coming to notre dame, i have done a lot of reflection on what is important to me, what morals i hold close to me, and what qualities i value in relationships. i know through my time here i am searching for a purpose, an extension of a way to help other people through myself and my skills. i am looking to change something and deeply impact someone’s life, which is something i’ve known for a long time. the only thing i can control is my effort and attitude. while i know my purpose in this world is to use my privileges of health, education, and socio-economic status to help those less fortunate than me, i think my purpose in college is a sublet of this. i can use my time and experience to help those around me in varying levels. i am grateful for the opportunity presented to me in my education, and i realized once here that a lot of students here really take it for granted. the privilege i have to be here is what motivates me to work as hard as i can. we live in a bubble (for the most part) where this path of life is normal for people, but i have come to realize how unique this experience really is. my purpose, therefore, is to give all of my effort to my studies and working on myself. the time and energy i put in my whole life to get here, the time and energy my family and friends put in, all leads to how i treat the responsibility i have now. i believe that i am responsible for my actions and how i treat others. i had always struggled with the idea that i can change others, or make them act in a different way if i dislike the way they treat me. i learned that i am only responsible for how i make other feel, and the effort i put into everything. that is the only thing i can control, not other people or their thoughts, but my own. although i was catholic growing up, as i’ve learned more about the world, i have become more agnostic. i was nervous for the religious aspect of notre dame, especially because i became hesitant to catholicism through my own church and schooling. i have come to learn how isolated that experience was, and i even attend masses although i do not experience it as my truth. i have learned about my faith and how it impact my relationships with others. professor fagberger says in his article, from the week 3 module, “when we experience these moments — either by giving love or receiving it — then we realize what is fundamental. we have been swimming in waters that feel bottomless, but on such occasions our toes just touch the bedrock.” faith is (not 1 necessarily religion, i believe they are related but independent) something that has helped me realize how important the support of others and personally being able to give it back is to me. i have come to believe that relationships gain depth with honesty and showing people respect. i think it is really easy to have superficial relationships, especially in college, and i have been very diligent about how i expend my energy on others. doctor brown, in her ted talk from week 1, said “the ability to feel connected is why we’re here”. this quote, and her whole talk, inspired me to realize how much of my 2 experience here is reliant on my relationships with others. while i have a good relationship with myself, the growth and change i am looking to gain from college is going to happen through my growth with others. i have noticed how easy it is for me to be consumed by what other people are doing or being on the same schedule as everyone, and i have learned that college is all about your own time. i have spent a lot of time working on time management, not procrastinating my work and doing the most for my future self. i also am good at setting time aside for myself, independent of school or social things. i really think that is what has helped me stay less stressed and calm than in high school, as well as being able to set boundaries for myself. i really believe that you cannot form meaningful relationships or develop yourself without really taking care of your physical and psychological well being. it is a bit paradoxical, in the sense that i usually do not notice if i am not doing well until it all spirals, so i have been very cognizant on checking in with myself a lot. this helps me be there for others as well, as i have a respect and understanding of myself that i can give. i know growth comes from being in uncomfortable and challenging situations. i have learned the most about myself from how i overcome things that are challenging to me, and learning how i react to negative emotions helps me grow. being in a dormant state of learning, where nothing is challenging me to try other approaches, is too safe. i feel more growth when i am in unfamiliar emotive state or situations, and coming out of those i have more confidence about anything that could come my way. i also have extended a lot of effort to solidifying a support network here, which has given me a lot of really deep conversations. i have seen that just sticking up for myself or being honest (david fagerberg, “faith brings light to a dark world”, https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-1 faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau (berné brown, “the power of vulnerability”, https://www.youtube.com/watch?2 v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3) https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 with people gets you so much farther than if you just try to forget about it. while i am very excited to go home, i have already found such a strong foundation here to come back to, and it’s beginning to feel like home. gordon 1 mr. oswald moreau fye 15 october 2021 learning to fail the past eight weeks of my life have been a whirlwind of new everything. new people, new food, new bed, new classes. this list could go on and on. with all this change along with the busy days of a college student, there has been little time to reflect. as the first half of my freshman year semester comes to a close, i realize that many of my previous beliefs have already been redefined or added onto due to experiences here at notre dame. upon reflection, i have come up with four core beliefs. i believe that failure can lead to growth if approached with the right mindset. i believe that with a positive outlook, i have an easier time seeing the good in the world around me. i believe that it is important to have something to believe in. and lastly, i believe that hard work and happiness can and should coexist. college is a time to be a little selfish. it is an opportunity to truly invest time in discovering who i am and where i am heading. while it is frightening and won’t be easy, the outcome will be worth it. i am a big believer in the phrase “you get out, what you put in.” my favorite quote was said by michael jordan and is as follows, “some people want it to happen. some wish it would happen. others make it happen.” making it happen will take courage and vulnerability, but through them i hope to truly find myself. already i feel like an entirely different person in college, and it is refreshing. nobody knows who i was before, so it is a chance to experiment and find out who i could be. one of my most proud moments so far at notre dame is the shock on my friends face when i told her i was the super quiet, reserved girl in high school. it has taken a lot to try and step out of my comfort zone, but it is starting to become more and more effortless and enjoyable! brene brown said in her “power of vulnerability” video, “you can’t selectively numb emotions,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brownmoreau fye week 1). this quote was somewhat of a realization for me. one can’t understand and appreciate joy if you haven’t experienced hardship. so, if you choose to numb https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be gordon 2 yourself to hardship, joy is unattainable. i know college will not always be easy, but the hard times and failure will only make the high times that much better. throughout my four years here i know i will spend a lot of time growing as an individual and searching for self-knowledge. mr. brooks speaks to this fact when he talks about the difference between building your eulogy virtues and resume virtues, (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooksmoreau fye week 2). he, however, mostly emphasizes the importance of building eulogy virtues. i disagree with him because i believe that eulogy and resume virtues are equally important. building resume virtues like hard work give you the ability to support your family and help others one day. one thing i have learned in my search for self-knowledge thus far at notre dame is that the generic quote, “hard work pays off,” needs to slightly modified to say eventually pays off. it is not an immediate return. in high school, i never failed. at notre dame, i have performed poorly in races, got my first bad grade on an exam, and been challenged mentally because the grind never stops. this first semester has been a crash course lesson on learning to fail. and i could have given in. but i believe that failure can lead to growth if approached with the right mindset. it is less about the immediate gratification of crossing the finish line in first or getting an a on an exam, and more about where these experiences will lead me. my outlook on faith is much different than most people here at notre dame, but i have had numerous positive conversations with classmates and teammates about my beliefs. professor fagerburg says in his text, “when my spiritual lighting changes, what i can spiritually see changes,” ("faith brings light to a dark world" by david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). for me, the “lighting” is really all about outlook on life because as i mentioned above, i believe that with a positive outlook, i have an easier time seeing the good in the world around me. this is a huge part of what my personal faith is all about. and another huge piece of my personal faith is summed up in carla harris’s speech to the graduating class of 2021 when she says, “time is the most important asset we have,” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harrismoreau week 5). i was not raised in a catholic household, so i have never had that foundation, but i still believe that it is important to have something to believe in. i choose to place my faith in the world around me and the present moment. time is the one thing that we can’t get more of and the one thing that we truly don’t know how much of it we have. it was not until i arrived here that i feel i have finally https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 gordon 3 started to fully embrace this mindset because i realized something when talking to a friend of mine that is a senior. she was talking about how fast she feels her time went here and she wishes she would have stopped to enjoy it more, but then she went on to talk about how stressed she is because she needs to find the perfect job. upon further reflection, i realized she is trapped in the cycle that most of america is in. always thinking about the next big thing they need to work towards, but where is the end. first you are told to work hard in high school, so that you get into a good college. then work all college to get a good paying job. then work the job, to move up to an even higher paying job. and just keep going because one day you will make it to retirement, which is when you can finally enjoy life. this is not how i want to live, and i don’t believe that this is the only way. i believe that hard work and happiness can and should coexist. i made the mistake of working my way through high school without ever stopping to enjoy and reflect on all the cool things i was doing. i won’t do that in college and i have already found little things i enjoy doing on the weekends to help myself find balance. for example, i live by the lakes and will go journaling at a picnic bench on saturday mornings! the other thing about time is that it does not discriminate. it doesn’t take into consideration society's stereotypes or prejudices and there is something to learn from that. in adichie’s ted talk about single stories she says, “the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but they are incomplete,” ("the danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau week 7). i grew up in the suburbs of pennsylvania in a mostly white middle class town. here at notre dame is the first time i have truly encountered this many people from significantly different backgrounds. it has been wonderful, yet frightening because i am realizing through each conversation, how sheltered the world i lived in before was. these experiences have helped me to break stereotypes that i didn’t even know were in my head. as i mentioned before, one of my favorite weekend activities is journaling by the lakes. i fell in love with journaling over the past year and i believe that it is a great way to work through the constant flow of thoughts in your mind, while also recording your stories. stories and experiences play a huge role in shaping every individual's perspective and uniqueness. thus, the best way to get to know someone is by asking them about their stories. a good indicator for me of a life-giving relationship, is when you both want to hear the stories of the other person and are truly engaged during the telling of the tales. personally, i have used this indicator along with gut https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next gordon 4 feeling to form strong relationships. when reading through signs of a toxic relationships, i can fortunately say that i have never experienced any of them, ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia taylormoreau fye week 4). my goal is to end my time here at notre dame with the ability to make the same statement, but while also having formed lifelong relationships. my other goal for when my time at notre dame is up, is to have plenty to add to my, “where i am from” poem, ("where i am from" by george ella lyonmoreau fye week 6). in my poem, i found myself focusing on three broad topics that defined where i am from. they included the physical places, the icons of those places, and the people from each place. if these first few weeks are any indicator of the rate at which i will grow personally over the next four years, i cannot wait to meet the future me. to hear how my current beliefs will once again be altered, but more importantly i will hope to hear about all the times that the future me just stopped to take it all in. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html word count: 1576 character development from the first-year experience my first semester at the university of notre dame was unlike any other period of my life. swings of emotions, periods of growth, and tests of my character and integrity have been common themes to this large-scale transition. every uphill battle i have fought this semester has led to unimaginable personal development that has shaped and reinforced the best parts of my character. undoubtedly, experiences at notre dame, especially considering my moreau class, have been thought-provoking and led me to question parts of my character to promote character development. overall, i have encountered many trivial, demanding, thought-provoking, and stressful situations, and i continually respond by using any experience, positive or negative, as a time for growth; i have and will celebrate success and learn from failure. one of the most thought-provoking moments from my moreau class, learning about responding to societal expectations left a lasting impression on me. in high school, my mindset was strictly geared to achieving the best grades for the wrong reasons. satisfying my parents and looking smart in the eyes of my peers served as my only motivation to achieve the highest test scores. i found that all my feelings of happiness, achievement, and satisfaction relied exclusively on how others felt. this flawed mindset carried into college; however, i soon shifted my mindset completely: “instead of asking, ‘what should i do?’ or ‘what would my friend/parent/significant other expect me to do?’, [i asked myself], ‘what do i want to do?’ and ‘what do i think is best?’” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julian hogan – moreau fye week nine [https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-ofexpectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau.]). i declared that my satisfaction would be dependent solely on my own personal expectations and aspirations, and i was attending school only for myself and not on behalf of others; the grades i receive are mine, so i have nothing to prove to anyone but myself. when i studied for the first test in microeconomics, i told myself i am only studying for my own benefit which relieved a huge burden and fear that was prevalent in my life. i carried this same energy and determination into the rest of my midterms as well. as a result, except for one 89%, i have received a’s on every one of my midterms and have performed above class average on each one as well. i feel much freer considering i am not chained or reliant on public perception. i strongly intend to carry this mindset and energy into future semesters at notre dame and hold this sentiment into years beyond. another thought-provoking topic from moreau came from the call to action in my community. the reflection from this week made me reflect on the problems plaguing my communities. coming from california, i have always seen the homeless crisis as the paramount issue that needs to be addressed immediately. however, with california’s government being all but completely inactive and inefficient, the homeless crisis has continued to rage on and grow exponentially. every commute to school, work, friends’ houses, restaurants, the post office, or anywhere else, i would see large and widespread homeless communities that have been prominent since before i even stepped foot on this planet. because of the lack of action from our bungling government, people like my family have taken it upon themselves to serve these communities and lend a helping hand. i had to realize that “[i] cannot pretend to stand outside this. [i am] woven into it” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten [https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writingsaddresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/]). catering to this belief, my family https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ cooks, serves, helps, donates, purchases presents, and performs countless charitable works to aid the homeless population for as long as i can remember. since this paramount issue plagues my society, i cannot simply be a bystander and allow the crisis to intensify; i have to take it upon myself to be a positive force in my community. i continue this ministry through my involvement in campus ministry with the notre dame right to life club where i stand firm on an issue i feel passionate about. i strive to be a positive force by promoting good in my society and calling for positive and lasting change. thus, i have always and, when i have a family of my own, will always continue to respond with positivity and service to societal problems i encounter in the future. by the same token, performing charitable works for widespread and diverse communities has served as eye-opening and character-building experiences. as stated earlier, the ineptitude of the california government meant that individual private citizens have had to take matters into their own hands. we have adopted the belief that “the authority to lead toward community can emerge from anyone in an organization—and it may be more likely to emerge from people who do not hold positional power” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven [http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-atcommunity/]). we encountered the problem of a growing crisis that was receiving no government attention, and we responded by catering to the needs of homeless people and increasing their chances of becoming a positive force to society. some charity works i have been involved with quite frequently include delivering christmas presents to underprivileged families, packaging and cooking meals for the homeless, volunteering with nursing homes, and promoting physical education with handicapped students. through all these actions, i have had countless interactions with people with different social, racial, and economic backgrounds than me. through these interactions, i have grown my understanding and awareness of their circumstances, and my passion to help them—despite my lack of positional power or authority— has only grown as i continue to strive to improve my community one person at a time. these diverse experiences have well equipped me with the ability and knowledge required to relate and serve those with a different background than me; i can better understand what they went through to end up at notre dame and give them a sense of comfort as i show them comfort and hospitality through my actions. i firmly intend to continue my family’s legacy of heavy community involvement well into my own future; whenever i see a societal community issue that i can be a positive force in, i will always be on the frontlines to get the situation addressed. however, more important than anything else, my most important example of character development from my encounters at notre dame has been the solidification of my catholic faith. from a specific moreau reflection, i identified that my “hope [from] trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom” is the root of my catholic faith (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve [https://assets.avemariapress.com/media/files/620c70f530258ca967f1906ce08329b8/holy_cross _and_christian_ed_-_excerpt.pdf.]). a common theme to my experience at notre dame so far, i have encountered countless trivial situations that tempted me to give up. however, focusing on my faith rooted in hope, i realized that giving up is way harder than trying. through these encounters, i never lose hope because i remind myself that god is always in control and loves me. because of this response, i constantly bounce back rapidly because i trust in the cross and link my sense of hope to my faith. at notre dame, the opportunity to have the glorious basilica and stunning grotto have served as places of comfort and refuge for me when times get rough; when i seek refuge in christ, he always answers and gives me hope that he will always watch over me and keep me going according to his plan. i will undoubtedly always maintain this mindset of faith through hope and continue to respond effectively and valiantly. the moreau first year experience enabled me to grasp a better understanding and awareness of my character development from my first semester. i am incredibly thankful for the opportunities to not only visualize and discuss my own progress but to also hear the encounters, stories, advice, and thoughts of my peers. it is easy to sometimes think you are alone in any given battle; however, hearing about others’ imperfections and struggles has made me realize i never have and never will be alone in any of my trivial life problems. there will always be someone going through the same thing, and even if i cannot find them, i can find a friend, family member, classmate, instructor, professor, and so many more people willing to help me. bring me to this settling peaceful conclusion, the moreau first year experience has served as a major asset to my academic and personal growth, and i could not be prouder of the students and instructor who made the experience as delightful, growth-promoting, and enjoyable as it was; i took part in life-changing and character-developing encounters that left a permanent impression on my character that i intend to carry for the rest of my time on earth. works cited fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. “wesley theological seminary commencement.” office of the president, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theologicalseminary-commencement/ julia hogan, lcpc. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-ofexpectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. king, fr. james b. “holy cross and christian ed assets.avemariapress.com.” holy cross and christian education, https://assets.avemariapress.com/media/files/620c70f530258ca967f1906ce08329b8/holy_ cross_and_christian_ed_-_excerpt.pdf. palmer, parker j. “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal.” center for courage & renewal, 25 feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ challenges, questions, trauma. and hope. noah mayer there were two things i really wanted out of my notre dame experience when i first arrived. i wanted a social environment that was large enough for me to find my niche, my people, and i wanted classes that interested and challenged me. given the size of notre dame and its academic clout, i would judge this as a fairly low bar, and notre dame has cleared it easily. but there were a great many things, both bad and good, that i had not anticipated encountering at notre dame, although some of them i perhaps should have seen coming. within the first week of classes, it had become rather obvious that guys’ dorm life at notre dame was not something for which i was cut out. the three pillars of mainstream male social interaction at notre dame are alcohol, women, and sports. i happen to be interested in precisely none of those things. the larger culture at fisher, and i’m sure at many other men’s dorms as well, are dominated by those three things, and so while i have never felt unwelcome i did and still do feel distinctly out of place in fisher. this was only compounded by the fact that the culture at fisher, specifically when it comes to women and alcohol, is not only contrary to my personal tastes but also unhealthy and perhaps even dangerous. what this means for me is two things. if i desire a community where i can safely and comfortably by myself, i need to look outside my own dorm. we read that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community,” parker j palmer, moreau fye week 11). and this is true to the extent that we should not view communities as projects to be improved upon. but sometimes we need to go out and find community instead of waiting for it to find us, and that is what i have tried to do at notre dame, and i have had success in doing it, in finding community outside my dorm where i feel i can be fully myself and where i can flourish. but even given that, i am still a part of the fisher community. “i cannot pretend to stand outside it. i am woven into it” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address,” fr. john jenkins, c.s.c., moreau fye week 10). and so i am called to do something about the culture. not by remaking it in my own image, or treating it as a project to be worked on, but rather by working with the others within fisher to make it safer and more healthy. and that starts with conversations, often difficult, unpleasant conversations, but ones i think need to be had about the culture within fisher and whether its really what any of us want. if you had asked me a year ago what i thought i would find at notre dame, questions about my sexual identity would never have crossed my mind. i was 100% certain that i was heterosexual, without even a glimmer of a doubt. but at notre dame i met a friend who was asexual. i had never met any asexual people before, and i was curious, so i asked some questions about what asexuality was and what it was like. and their answers were unsettlingly familiar. so i asked some more questions, i did some research online, i talked with some of my closest friends. in the space of five days, i realized that one of the core parts of my identity was not what i thought it was. i was asexual, and probably aromantic as well. it is hard to describe the feelings that i experienced in the next days and weeks. on the one hand, there was a sense of relief, of a weight being lifted. i had been pressed by expectations, both my own and those of others, into seeking out a girlfriend for the past nine years, and now i could finally let that go and live my own life (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit,” julia hogan, moreay fye week 9). on the other hand, there was a sense of anger. i had spent nine years chasing after something i had never really wanted to begin with, and i place the blame for that squarely on the popular culture that showed me happy, smiling, blissful couples in every book and movie and tv show, that told me again and again how wonderful love was, how life-changing it would be once i found it. well it turns out i neither want nor need romantic love, and they could have told me that was a possibility before i spent nine years chasing it. finally, there was a profound sense of isolation, of not belonging, of being neither seen nor understood. name one asexual person in mainstream media. i can’t. multiple times, when i came out to a friend, they told me some variation of “you’ll grow out of it.” i was forced to identify myself as ‘other’ when a survey asked me about my sexuality. day after day, i am faced with constant, subtle reminders that i am not normal, that i am ‘other,’ that i do not fit in, do not belong. one final thing i encountered at notre dame was not actually something i found here but something i had brought with me from my own past. to say i had a bad high school experience would be putting it lightly. academically, everything was stellar. i did well in all of my classes, and i had good relationships with my teachers. unfortunately, i did not have good relationships with my classmates. i went to a small school, only thirty of us were in my graduating class, and most of my classes were segregated by gender, so there were even less of us in the classroom. day in and day out, for six years, i was stuck with the same eleven other boys. and about half of them got on my nerves in the worst ways possible. at times, they bullied me directly, but for the most part they were just loud, obnoxious, misogynist, and racist in my vicinity. the handful of times i spoke out against them and their behavior, they went after me for it. and most of the time i was too focused trying to hold myself together to say anything. it was not until i arrived here at notre dame that i realized just how bad things were at my high school. there was a large amount of time in my sophomore and junior years that i wanted to kill myself or to kill one of my classmates. there were two instances i self harmed, and many more times i thought about it. in the past few weeks, i have been confronting all the trauma that experience has left me with, trauma which, until now, i had not realized i had. but i recognize now that it has left me with emotional and mental scars, with a distrust of and distaste for men my own age, with a lingering feeling of isolation despite the friends i have made here at notre dame. if these three things were the only things i had encountered at notre dame, i would likely be miserable right now. but fortunately, i encountered something else as well. i encountered hope. even in my darkest times at notre dame, i’ve found support from those around me, from my professors and instructors, from my peers and classmates, and from the leadership in my hall. i know that even when i stumble and fall, as i have and no doubt will again in the future, even when it seems like the darkness is closing in all around me, that i can still have hope in myself, in my brothers and sisters, and in christ (“holy cross and christian education,” fr. james b. king, c.s.c., moreau fye week 12). note: i made mention of past suicidal and violent thoughts and desires in this integration. i want to reassure you that those are all firmly in the past. i’ve not had anything like them in over a year. nicolina shah integration two moreau fye december 2nd, 2021 shah we all need somebody to lean on being a member of notre dame’s nrotc battalion can be compared to being a member of another family on campus. everyone has each other’s backs, all of the midshipmen look out for each other, and push each other to be the best person they can be. however, there are also a lot of challenges that this program entails. since the program is so competitive, it is easy to hold yourself to imaginary expectations. for example, a midshipman could push themselves to run the fastest mile and a half in their squad or earn the ‘midshipman of the week’ award more than once. these accomplishments should be praised, but that does not mean that everyone has to be held accountable to those expectations. not everyone can run a 9-minute mile and a half, and not everyone even wins the ‘midshipman of the week’ award. these imaginary expectations hold some of the midshipmen back, instead of making them stronger. in an article by julia hogan, she says that “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others” (“why letting go of expectations enables you to live a better life” by julia hogan-moreau fye week 9). if any of the midshipmen are accomplishing anything in the battalion purely for the sake of others, then they are truly not accomplishing anything. like julia said, living up to the expectations of others will always backfire on you. instead of trying to accomplish something for someone else, one should accomplish something for their own happiness. in the end, this way of living life will grant freedom. another aspect of being a member of notre dame’s nrotc battalion is encountering several different views on today’s world and its problems. since the battalion consists of almost 150 midshipmen, there are a variety of differing opinions about race, faith, modern world problems, political views, and so much more. however, the midshipmen are constantly reminded of who and what they are representing by their commanding officer, lieutenants, captain, gunnery sargent, and commander. the midshipmen are representing the soldiers and sailors who have died before them, the soldiers and sailors actively serving, and their country. everything that they do both in and out of uniform represents these ideals. therefore, it is extremely important that the midshipmen are mindful of their actions, and stand up for the correct values in today’s society. for example, if any of the midshipmen saw racial injustice or sexual harassment happening, they should stand up for the person or people being harmed, and be proud of what they are doing and who they are representing. in a seminary commencement address, father jenkins says, “i ask you to affirm again the noble beliefs that led you here, and advance those beliefs in ways that strike a moral contrast with the dominant culture of discourse in the country today. if you do this, you will set a new standard for moral conviction in the 21st century” (“wesley theological seminary commencement | office of the president | university of notre dame” by father john jenkins-moreau fye week 10). father jenkins is asking everyone to stand up for their noble beliefs. those noble beliefs are the difference between a person committing injustices and a person standing up for what is right. if the midshipmen stand up for their noble beliefs and follow through with what their senior officers have instructed them on, then they have the power to create a new standard of hope and justice in the world. another key part of the battalion is that everyone in the notre dame nrotc battalion is ranked. the freshmen are 4/c, which is the lowest ranking, the sophomores are 3/c, and so on. not only do the individual grades hold ranks, but there are also battalion jobs that hold a higher ranking in themselves. for example, there are the positions of battalion operations, battalion sargent major, and battalion commanding officer. these positions immediately rank higher than any of the midshipmen with no jobs, and even some of the jobs outrank the other jobs. in summary, the battalion has a hierarchical structure. from the outside, this can look demeaning and soul-crushing, but in reality, this is what makes the battalion so strong. it creates a sense of respect between the midshipmen and deepens the professional relationship between one them. it also teaches the midshipmen with higher rankings to not abuse their power. the more they learn while in the battalion, the less they will err in the real fleet. in an article by parker j. palmer, he says, “contrary to popular opinion, community requires leadership, and it requires more leadership, not less, than bureaucracies” (“thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal” by parker j. palmer-moreau fye week 11). leadership is what creates a community, and it is what creates the battalion. if there was only one person in charge, then the leadership would be chaotic and unpredictable. everyone needs someone to depend and rely on, and that is the point of a hierarchical structure. the battalion could not operate with a single battalion commanding officer or a single commanding officer just like the country could not operate with a single president. the hierarchical structure allows a strong flow of information, a trustworthy way to communicate, and a system where no one is alone. a strong community needs leadership and should be fought for. a final aspect of the battalion is the battalion’s hope for future success. everything that the battalion does holds importance. everything that the midshipmen do prepares them for their future careers as naval or marine officers in the fleet. it not only prepares them for a future career, but for a successful future career. the battalion staff and officers want the midshipmen to be successful, and they all hope for their success. this is proven by their dedication to the midshipmen and the battalion itself. every officer in the battalion has mentioned at least three times each day that the midshipmen can walk into their office at any moment of the day, and that they are there to help them with any of their problems, even if it seems small and unrelated. this hope instilled in the officers allows the midshipmen to have a similar way of thinking. they accomplish all of their tasks with dedication and the utmost attention to detail hoping that it will help them later in the fleet. the midshipmen are hoping for a successful future career just like the officers are. in a text by father king, it says that “we must be men with hope to bring” (“holy cross and christian education” by father james b. kingmoreau fye week 12). everyone has some sense of hope for the better in their lives. it is the hope that we bring into the world that changes it. if no one had any hope, then the world would never change. the hope that the midshipmen have pushes them to learn the most they can out of their four years at notre dame, while the hope that the officers have strengthens them to become the best instructors they can be to their midshipmen. that hope makes everyone in the battalion desire to accomplish amazing things, and change the navy or marine corps in a positive way. without hope, all would be lost, and nothing would change for the better. in this image, midn 4/c shah is being lifted by midn 4/c flowers and gonzalez during their navy ball freshmen dance. during this dance, the 4/c midshipmen from each company complete a five-minute dance to be judged by their higher-ranking midshipmen. in this image, a midshipman is on watch for the veteran’s day vigil ceremony. each midshipman in the battalion has a 30 minute watch period, which goes over the course of 24 hours. the midshipmen represent those who have died serving and those who are actively serving, and they honor them by going on watch. this ceremony teaches the midshipmen to understand who and what they are representing. image2.jpg image1.jpg huller 1 theo helm moreau fye 15 october 2021 what do i believe? i believe that i am searching for an expansion of character. i believe that my personal growth stems from mistakes. i believe that i pursue truth through keeping an open mind. and i believe that change, while uncomfortable, is necessary to form a fully developed sense of self. the first and last root belief very much go hand in hand. coming into college, i felt very anxious about what i was to expect. i had lived in the same house for nearly 18 years, had the same friend group since elementary school, and always found comfort in the safety of my home, my family, and my friends (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week 6). on one hand, i was excited about being more independent and living six hours away from home, but on the other hand, i felt like such a daunting task loomed ahead of me, waiting for me to essentially create myself in an entirely new location and environment. i had an opportunity to focus on developing myself in a new place, and, while seemingly difficult, i knew that making that change would prove to positively impact my development of character and moral standing overall. in high school, i was perfect on paper: captain of the lacrosse team, spanish club, math team, robotics team coach, gold award. that doesn’t set me apart at notre dame; i’m not special because of what’s on my resume. everyone volunteered. everyone was the captain of huller 2 their sports team. not to say those things don’t matter, but i realized i needed to focus more on developing myself as a person rather than adding on to my laundry list of extracurriculars (david brooks: should you live for your résumé... or your eulogymoreau fye week 2). here, because of the fact that i am in a new environment, no one has set expectations for who i will be or how i will act. i have the ability to focus on redefining myself in ways that i couldn’t focus on developing back in my hometown. for instance, in our character trait test (via character strengths surveymoreau fye week 2), self-discipline was my highest trait and love was one of my lowest. back home, i focused so much on defining what was morally right and morally wrong for myself that i lived a very strict, self-controlled life. at notre dame, i can focus on developing the character traits on which i had lower scores like love and empathy because no one has that knowledge of who i was back home. in addition, notre dame reminded me of the importance of faith in conjunction with other aspects of life. at home, i had always kept faith in its own little box in my brain and i would be reminded of it for a brief hour every sunday during church. here, though, faith is ever present and all around me, as it should be. as pointed out in “faith brings light to a dark world,” faith is the method of belief in which community is created. in order to create a meaningful community and fully engage meaningfully with other people, faith is a necessity (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg – moreau fye week 3). this is further expanded upon in “two notre dames: your holy cross education,” when it discusses the importance of the intersection between faith and reason. the integration of faith can be an extremely valuable asset in education; however, it is necessary that each part does not overpower the other (two notre dames: your holy cross education by kevin grove – moreau fye week 5). huller 3 my second root belief, i believe that my personal growth stems from making mistakes, is also an aspect of myself that i am working to better during my time at the university. this belief is a lot easier said than done, because no one wants to make mistakes. however, as discussed in brené brown’s ted talk, vulnerability in mistakes is extremely important in the development of character (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week 1). if mistakes are never made, there is never a driving force pushing someone to become a better person; mistakes ultimately highlight the need for change. the final core belief is that i pursue truth by keeping an open mind. i whole-heartedly believe that open-mindedness is the single most important character trait someone can have. as discussed in the ted talk, “the danger of a single story,” reducing someone to one possible character trait or version of themselves does a complete disservice to their whole personality (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). additionally, this issue is very prevalent in our world, especially in the political arena. the inability to be openminded when hearing other’s opinions is the root of a number of problems in the country. if we took a step back, in politics specifically, and made an effort to look at issues from the opposition’s point of view, it would become so much easier to generate productive discourse with effective compromise. however, there are nuances that apply when discussing open mindedness because, as always, each idea has limitations. a good example of this is from our week four discussion on relationships. at some point, it is necessary to realize that the openmindedness and giving someone the benefit of the doubt must ultimately come to an end (“healthy vs unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign – moreau fye week 4). with that being said, in the majority of conflicts and discussions, open-mindedness is a necessary component in effective discussion. huller 4 works cited adichie, chimamanda ngozi, director. tedtalks: chimamanda adichie--the danger of a single story. the danger of a single story, july 2009, https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story. accessed 10 oct. 2021. fagerberg, david. “faith brings light to a dark world.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-darkworld/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. grove, kevin, director. two notre dames: a holy cross education. panopto, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187. accessed 10 oct. 2021. lyon, george ella. “where i'm from.” where i'm from, a poem by george ella lyon, writer and teacher, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html. “tedtalks: brene brown--the power of vulnerability.” ted, 2010. tedtalksdirector, director. david brooks: should you live for your résumé... or your eulogy? youtube, youtube, 14 apr. 2014, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim. accessed 5 oct. 2021. “the via character strengths survey.” personality test, personality assessment: via survey | via institute, https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup huller 5 my growth as a person in notre dame in biology, it is common to define living organisms as creatures that interact with their environment and internalize part of that environment into their own structure. in the context of my experience at notre dame, i have been exposed to situations that questioned my priorities and values, fundamentally changing how i see myself. when i was younger, i used to think that my value as a human being fundamentally depended on my academic status: if i were among the firsts in my class ranking, i would be thrilled, whereas if i were one of the last, i would be hopelessly depressed. even worse, my obsession with ranking also affected how i saw my peers: if they were above me, they would be more valuable, whereas those below me would be seen as inferior. however, that pathological hierarchy that i had erected in my head soon started to hurt my own perspective of self, and it came precisely on my moment of greatest success. when i finally reached the first position in my high school class, this news came to me not as a victory but as a loss. as the "first" among my peers, i felt that i also had no value. as i mentioned before, i used to see the students with worse grades as being "inferior" to me. but then, if all of them were "worthless" due to their lower rank, it naturally followed that i had not earned my accomplishments, and thus i had no worth either. in psychology, the feeling i was experiencing had a name: "impostor syndrome." impostor syndrome is the persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one's own efforts or skills "this can spiral into feelings that they don't deserve accolades and opportunities over other people" ("what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo). indeed, when i received my letter of acceptance to the university of notre dame, i thought to myself that a university that could accept someone as unskilled as me could never be one worthy of respect. however, i could not be more wrong. my experience at notre dame fundamentally changed me. it showed me that my obsession with academic ranking was a childish and reduced view of reality and that, instead, the world was filled with much more beauty and life than i had initially expected. in the first semester, i was overwhelmed by the number of people i met and the friends i made. in fact, i made so many friends that sometimes i would even forget their names. but i did not forget their names because i was not interested in them; instead, it was because they came in such a staggering quantity that my brain could not process all that information at once. little by little, however, these friendships grew more robust, and we soon found ourselves in a place where we could share our insecurities and vulnerabilities. indeed, no matter how hard my trials and tribulations were, i could always rest assured that my friends would always be there for me. as palmer wrote in thirteen ways of looking at community, "communities that can withstand hard times and conflict can help us become not just happy but "at home." ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/). communities are, by definition, complex systems where the whole is more than merely the sum of its parts. the word "community" implies interconnectedness, mutual help, and mutual support. as a matter of fact, despite being more than four thousand miles away from my family, i could feel at home because my friends – like my family – would always reach out to me when i needed it the most. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ i am not ashamed to say that i struggled with the amount of work i had to do in this first semester. indeed, my first grades in college were significantly lower than what i had originally expected. the shock of receiving such low grades genuinely disappointed me. still, it ultimately acted as a wake-up call for a change in the way i saw myself. it was precisely because of this distress that i realized that there is more to a person's worth than how many answers they get right in a quiz or test. in fact, a few weeks later, i remember reading a phrase from my qqc 10 that perfectly articulated the way i felt after this blow to my pride: "i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it's a very good thing, that it's worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together." ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grotto moreau fye week ten https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/). if i had not experienced that disappointment, i would not have opened myself up to a new opportunity for growth. in the screwtape letters, c.s. lewis writes that god relies "on the troughs even more than on the peaks" ("the screwtape letters" by c.s lewis moreau fye week twelve https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?module_item_id=109705). what he means by this is that it is in our moments of hardship that we learn to find the things that really matter to us. in this sense, i am thankful for the tribulations that i experienced because they deconstructed the view i had of my grades. grades don't measure how much you will get paid or how high your iq is; they only measure how good you are at answering questions under pressure. my obsession with them was, therefore, utterly ridiculous. throughout this first semester, i learned to detach myself from my academic expectations and be thankful for the friends i made along the way. in conclusion, i feel much happier now than i https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?module_item_id=109705 did before coming to notre dame. i hope that the semesters to come will offer me even more opportunities for growth. going forward, i believe that i need to set some boundaries in order to achieve a more balanced way of life. i feel like sometimes me and my friends party too much. going overboard when it comes to partying could be detrimental not only to my growth as a person but also to my friends as a community. in years to come, i plan to be more disciplined and seek to help my friends fight against their excesses. in so doing, i wish to improve both my environment and myself. w moreau integration 3 my eulogy we are gathered here today not to mourn, but to celebrate the life of ella dale darrow. although she had a short life (2003-2022), she was still well-known for having a life that people would consider well-lived. a life well-lived can be a pretty subjective thing, but through ella’s writings in her moreau class, we were able to see exactly what she described as what she thought was essential to it. ella always tried to see life for what it really was. she liked the quote,“it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives“ by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). she saw this to say that although life may seem hard to understand and hectic at times, all we need to do is step back for a second, take a breather, and see it from a broader perspective. i know that one time in her life, she herself felt very suffocated by the things happening and struggled with this idea. this quote, she believed, summed up what she needed to understand to turn the situation around. ella also always felt a strong part of a life well-lived is commitment. in the hesburgh documentary, they describe hesburgh as so: “this is someone who was totally committed to his faith, to his country, and to what was right.” (“hesburgh“ produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). when ella saw this quote, she thought to herself yep, that is exactly how i want to be remembered, as someone who is committed to the things they do and the people they have. for, what is the purpose of life without a belonging to something? she saw this as important, and this could be seen in her life through the clubs and groups she was in. her commitment was also seen with her relationships with family and friends, which she cherished. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 though she has passed now, ella never feared death. a quote she found really embodied this was, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness, but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die“ by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). ella always had this lack of fear that others had, and i believe that it’s because she always knew this day would come and accepted it early on. she was extremely selfless in her life, so it is no wonder that somehow she has been able to give herself wholly, even to death. in ella’s short life, she had only a handful of professional relations, but she tried her hardest to make them count. a quote about this that could sum up her beliefs is, “as you can see, career development is a process and a journey. if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” (“navigating your career journey“ by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). she did not always believe this though. through her life experiences, she learned this the hard way. i remember once she told me a story about how at her first job, she did not follow any of this advice. instead, she was quiet and did not use the tools given to her. this led her to come to the harsh reality of life, albeit almost getting fired, but she grew from this experience, and this contributed to her life that was so well-lived. as i had said before, ella cherished her relationships with family and friends dearly. one in particular was her relationship with her mother. her mother experienced the most time with ella during her life, being there through her growing ages and watched her grow into the person she was. she believed that others played a huge role in her life. she said once to ella, “i think that you are a very empathetic and caring person, and what you desire most is to be happy while making the people surrounding you just as happy”. i believe this was a perfect way to explain how ella was. she always was https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ putting others first, even before her own happiness sometimes, because she knew in the end, her life would be more well-lived through her commitment to others. though we are here to honor ella’s life, i know she would be upset if i only mentioned her in a perfect light. she was a fiery soul, and was not afraid to share what she thought about others when she deemed it necessary. some people found this to be abrasive, but i saw it as a good characteristic. the problem was that she was always just as hard, if not harder, on herself. if she were still here right now, i would tell her this quote: “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)“ by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). i would want to show her this because it explains how asking ourselves “what” in bad situations is better than asking “why”. she would often ask “why” she would do bad things, and this would lower her self-esteem. i would show her this quote to help her realize how she could have lived a life that was more fulfilling in this manner. although she is gone and not coming back anytime soon, the way she lived can inspire us all to live a life more well-lived. when she read the eighth chapter of “tattoos on the heart”, she felt that something everyone needed to hear was this:“we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgement and open the other eye to pay attention.” (“tattoos on the heart“ by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). she loved this quote because it gives us optimism. it shows that it is never too late to change your life and make it better. you are not stuck on the path that you are heading down. i want to leave you off with that thought, and wonder how you, too, can live a lie well-lived as w did. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/523975/download?download_frd=1 integration #2 moreauleis leave town: find the people you know? i have encountered that first year was not as i expected. i thought i could, as the avett brothers say, “disappear from my hometown to go find the people that i know.” turns out that was not so easy. i have made some good friends, but at times, i feel like i am missing what i used to have back where i went to high school in baton rouge, louisiana. in week 9, bergmann says “now a sophomore, i see how ridiculous my expectations were for my first year. to assume i could instantly meet my new best friends while also getting used to a new place, starting a new academic career, and learning how to adjust to life away from home — that’s a full plate already.” (week 9) she is so right. i do have a lot on my plate, and i did have very high expectations on how everything ‘should’ work out. as i learn time and time again, hardly anything ever goes as we think it ‘should.’ our whole life is in the hand of god and there is nothing we can do about it besides try to be patient and trusting. i have encountered that my catholic faith can be much different from other peoples’ catholic faiths. back home, most of the community had roughly the same idea of what our faith should be like. this created an echo chamber of sorts, and i was starting to think that there was only one good way to be catholic. this was challenged when i came here though. i met so many catholics from around the world who live out their faith in a very different way than me. i have appreciated seeing different sides of the church and seeing this gives me a passion to live as one as jesus instructed us. “we cannot proclaim the love of god in christ without seeking the unity of all christians.” (jenkins week 10) this statement originally from pope john paul ii and then paraphrased by fr. jenkins has an almost entirely new meaning to me. i really look forward to meeting more people who live out their faith in a different way than me. i have encountered what a truly strong community looks like while living in the seminary. i have learned so much from my brothers in formation about what relationships should look like and how to maintain healthy ones. one key was illustrated well in week 11, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (palmer week 11) if we are able to look at community as a gift instead of a chore, i think new appreciation abounds. i have learned so much from my relationship with my roommate especially. we live in such close quarters that we both need to be on the same page on what needs to happen in our room. we have found a good system which keeps are room in good shape as well as our relationship. i really view him as a gift to be received instead of another person to keep in touch with and try to stay close friends with. i have encountered new experiences in my prayer life while here as well. in the past, consistency in prayer was a real struggle for me. i wanted to pray daily but nevertheless, every once and a while, i would skip out on a day. this drove me crazy for years. once i got here, i was gifted a wonderful community to pray with me every day. for this, i am so grateful because i have become more consistent. it is so difficult to be consistent in prayer because of the peaks and valleys of it. lewis says in week 12, “their nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation—the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks.” (lewis week 12) c.s. lewis is saying to expect the troughs and peaks of prayer. getting up to pray will not always be easy. prayer will not always seem fruitful. prayer might seem like a complete waste of time in the troughs. lewis reminds us to stick with this though because the troughs are some of the best times to be faithful to god. in these times when prayer does not ‘feel’ good, the most growth can happen. this year i feel like i have been really living this out well. i have encountered the lord in consistency. overall, i feel like my true encounter this year has been with independence from family and all it entails. firstly, i will be the first to admit that i am not truly independent. i am fed, housed, schooled, and supported by the university. but i do still feel that being away from home is at least part of independence. i have been enjoying this year immensely away from home. it is not because i dislike my family or anything but more because i felt like it was time to go. it feels good to be self-reliant and not having parents wanting to know what you are doing. i appreciated their care for me, but things are much better not having to constantly update them with what i am doing. getting away from the superficial though, i feel encouraged that i can live away from my family and be happy. it gives me a certain confidence to take into the rest of my life and not be afraid of where i live. technology is such a blessing to keep in touch with family from afar. i am growing and i will respond by soaking it all up and discerning with it. i think one of the worst things to do is get set in your ways. no matter your age, being unable to change your views, outlook, etc. can be very detrimental to overall health. i think it is important to always stay curious and remain a student in all aspects of life. the butterfly story of my life has been filled with many ups and downs since my first encounter with judgment in elementary school because of my skin color. as we talked about in week one i think that courage has been a strong emphasis in my life, and i think that not only has it helped me become who i am today i believe it is the reason i am who i am. i have had a very tough time in my life with allowing myself to be vulnerable and opening up. but through it all, i was able to use the courage that i had built and that my parents had taught me to push past the vulnerability that i felt during my first weeks at notre dame. belonging is something that i have always looked for in life and i could not find it for the longest time before coming here because i was scared and ashamed of who i was so i kept to myself a lot during the first weeks at school. i was able to use this courage i built while i was a kid to find who i was. not only did this give me a sense of belonging like researcher brene brown says about overcoming shame, i myself finally felt worthy and that i could do the same thing others could do (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). it allowed me to be able to find out more about myself and that is why for me i believe that courage holds the most value to me, because for me without courage i would not be able to overcome my vulnerability, and not be able to find that belonging that we as humans search for. during the transition period coming to notre dame there were a lot of nerves, thoughts, and predictions i had on how things were going to unfold. during my first few weeks, i made it my goal to write a new chapter and start here the person i wish i would have started high school. as mentioned by mr. brooks in week two there are two kins or characteristics (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). the ones that i had shown before coming to notre dame were those resume characteristics that i thought were most important to show because that is what i believed people found most important. however, i made it clear that i would begin to show off those eulogy characteristics and would make sure to start acting and portraying how i feel versus behaving based on what people opinions are here, and what better place to begin doing that than college where no one knows really who you are. i made that choice before hearing what mr. brooks had to say. but after listening to him i believe that to become my true self and become my most authentic self and be the person i feel on the inside on the outside as well, i have to focus on those eulogy characteristics. during my time playing college baseball since i have arrived on campus, i believe it is my destiny to be where i am. the challenge mentally college baseball places on you is extreme. however, being in a place where faith and exploring your faith is part of the requirements pushes me to overcome the struggles of baseball because through my time exploring my faith and through the help of my first ever theology class, i have discovered that the things in our lives are planned and that everything in our world has a reason behind it. not until college have i had any experience in my faith or in what i believed, i spent the first 17 years of my life focusing on those things that i can control and would pour everything into them to be sure to accomplish what i want. not until college did i even consider god as being a factor in my life. from professor david fagerberg i found myself in agreement with when he mentions how faith brings light to a dark world (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). those words resonated with me because of what i felt when i began searching for my faith and what i agree with. those were things i had implemented into my life maybe not by choice at first but certainly now by choice. during my time in high school i found myself making friendships that did not benefit me but benefitted the other person. i found myself being so caught up in making the other person happy i did not pay attention to my own happiness and if they were making me happy. the video about the “i love you” highlighted what i thought was something very interesting, in the fact that i truly do things for my friends because i love them not even thinking about if i actually enjoy doing some of the things (#thatsnotlove campaign | because i love you whiskey | one love foundation by joinonelove moreau fyw week 4). this is something that after completing this week 4 i realized that i needed to have some conversations with some of my friends about what i needed out of our friendship that i was giving but was not receiving in return. some took it well and others decided it was not worth it. i believe that to have a relationship that is strong those conversations need to happen and if they are willing to give you what you deserve then the relationship is worth keeping but if not then it is not worth it. i believe that personal stories can tell a lot about a person. i also believe that they can be used to educate others and create a more transparent relationship between a group of people or even just 2 people. this week really opened up my eyes to how much the stories that have been shared with me shaped who i am. my grandmother grew up as a black woman in 1930 in southern mississippi and man does she have stories that make my hatred of homework seem the size of a grain of rice. one that resonates with me the most is the story that she told me when i was younger about her journey to and from school. she and her siblings would have to walk to school every day about 15-20 miles. they were not allowed to take the bus because it was only for the white children, so they would walk. she said that if you ever heard cars coming up behind you, that you better get in the ditch and lay as flat as possible so they don’t see you and she wouldn’t move until she was sure they were far enough away to not be seen. this story my grandmother shared with me is only one of the reasons i am who i am today. i now encourage my fellow teammates, classmates, and friends to share their stories to one another, because not only do stories create a connection, they allow the other person to see what youre going through and it creates a transparency that sometimes is needed to have and understanding within a relationship. so that is what i believe is important to do and what i try to encourage my fellow peers here at notre dame to do as well. i think carla harris say it well in her laetare madalist address about how this one shared story of the pandemic has been a blessing in so many ways. (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). week 6 i thought was very interesting approach to displaying my background. i think that it made me realize some of the influencers in my life. the main ones being my parents and how they shaped me to be me. as shown in the where i am from poems they all have some similarities in that there are people referenced in different ways to show how much they mean to the author (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). oddly enough what led me to my discussions in week 7 were stemmed from my week 6 puzzle. in week 7 )“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) is what my reference was to my mother in that she is smal in size but when needed she stands taller than ever. i meant this because on top of my mom working full time and raising me and my brother while my dad worked ridiculous hours she never failed to teach us how to deal with things that were yet to come, but things that she knew woud come up because of my skin color. she taught us what a single story was and she made sure that we never used single stories to define someone and always taught us to dig deeper. which is something that i have been able to carry with me here at notre dame and i have met some of the best people because of it. my learning has been both challenging and impactful. i have applied what i have learned from this class to my life but i have also used what i have learned from this class as a way of backing up what i already have learned. i will continue to apply this knowledge to help me with friendships, struggles, stories, and conflicting ideas so that way i will be able to combat these issues with the a level head and continue to become my best self. not only has thios class opened my mind but it has given me information i will be able to use for my entire life. taormina 1 professor thigpen moreau 19 november 2021 learning and growing from encounters throughout the few months i have been at notre dame thus far, i have encountered a variety of situations and environments that have allowed me to learn and grow as a person. when first arriving at notre dame, i had set expectations for myself, the people i would meet, the classes i would take, and the environment of the school in general. one prominent expectation i had coming to notre dame was that i would fall behind my fellow students, which led me to believe that i did not deserve to go to notre dame. this inability to believe that a person’s success is well-deserved, also known as imposter syndrome, was discussed in week nine. elizabeth cox spoke on the idea that it is very common for people to feel that they deserve their accomplishments during her ted talk “what is imposter syndrome?” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine). cox also found that while imposter syndrome is popular amongst all people, it is especially evident in underrepresented or minority groups. because we are not aware of how hard other people have worked for their accomplishments, it is human nature to downplay our own accomplishments. while this idea is labeled imposter syndrome, it is important to remember that this feeling is universally felt. imposter syndrome is not a disease or mental illness, and it does not have to be tied to feelings of depression. while these expectations tend to manifest inside of people and develop imposter syndrome, letting go of expectations can be very freeing. in her article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit,” author julia hogan gives several examples which prove that societal expectations are arbitrary (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau taormina 2 hogan – moreau fye week nine). once i learned to let go of the negative expectations i had for myself in relation to the other students at notre dame, it gave me peace of mind and allowed me to truly believe that i belong here. people spend so much time and effort not only trying to meet their own expectations, but especially the expectations of others and society in general. while it can be very difficult, trying to let go of these expectations will immensely improve one’s mental health and attitude. because of these expectations set by society, a person can sometimes encounter struggles and obstacles. while notre dame’s community and environment provide everything a student needs in order to succeed, it is common and natural for people to encounter sadness. when someone encounters difficulty in their life, it is crucial that they utilize a healthy outlet to both let out anger and grow and recover from the experience. during week ten, we learned about kintsugi art, which is a method people can use to heal when they encounter brokenness. kintsugi is the art of breaking a piece of pottery and putting the pottery pieces back together with gold. the idea behind the breaking of the pottery is to embrace one’s flaws or imperfections and remember the struggles from which they overcame. there is a clear parallel between physically putting the piece of pottery back together and mentally putting one’s positive mentality back together after overcoming an obstacle. a touching theme of kintsugi art is that the new piece of pottery is even stronger and more beautiful than it was before because of the previous state of brokenness. in the video, kirsten helgeson draws a parallel a broken piece of pottery and a broken heart (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” – moreau fye week ten). she emphasizes the importance of a person learning that not only is their heart breakable, but also that is had the ability to be repaired. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau taormina 3 being surrounded by a strong and uplifting community had made a huge difference in my experience at notre dame. in reference to week eleven, author parker j. palmer speaks about what a community should look like and offers various perspectives on the idea of a proper community. one aspect of community that palmer speaks on is leadership and what leadership should look like in order to help a community flourish. “leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). this statement resonated with me in that before coming to notre dame, the only space where i truly felt like i could be fully myself without judgement was around my family. in order to create a trustworthy space, people need to feel as though they are not going to be judged or excluded. the people i have gotten to know and the friends i have made at notre dame all exemplify what love and acceptance of all people looks like. it is because of this that not only is the notre dame community so strong, but also all of the smaller communities within notre dame. my time at notre dame has not only allowed me to grow as a person, but it has given me hope for my growth in the future. one of the readings included in week twelve was “the screwtape letters.” in “the screwtape letters,” author c.s. lewis briefly spoke about the continual change that a person experiences, which can be tied to the idea of hope. lewis claims that “while their spirit can be directed to an eternal object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). this quote reminds the audience that people are always changing and evolving, which is a good thing. change can give hope for the future whether one’s current circumstances are good or bad. having hope during times of turbulence can be the reason that a person overcomes the obstacle; because hope allows one to http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188541?module_item_id=105321 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188541?module_item_id=105321 taormina 4 know that things will get better in the future. one way a person can have hope is through their faith. one of the main ideas of “hopeholy cross and christian education” that fr. james b. king speaks about is a christian’s calling and their likeness to god (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). knowing that god has created every human in his own image of love and charity can give a person a sense of hope and comfort during difficult times. a unique and special characteristic of notre dame is the presence of faith on campus. while it is not forced upon students, faith is present to provide students with an uplifting community, which can give notre dame students specifically a sense of love and belonging. the presence of the notre dame community gives me a sense of hope; and i know that if i encounter dissonance and brokenness, i can use the lessons i have learned throughout moreau to overcome obstacles with a positive mindset. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 the beauty in brokenness the beauty in brokenness “you know we love you, and we know this is going to be an amazing opportunity for you to grow in all possible ways.” this was one of the last things my family told me before i headed into my boarding gate to catch the first of two flights that would transport me from natal, brazil to notre dame. during my trip, which was more than one day long, i reflected about everything i was leaving behind my family, friends, and my comfort zone and thought about my expectations for the next four years which were, obviously, unrealistically positive. i believed that the problems i used to have back home would be gone, and that i would be able to have a fresh start. although this was partially true i had the opportunity to build new habits and relationships a part of it was not: unfortunately, my issues would not instantly disappear, and i would have to eventually face them. during my first weeks at notre dame, my excitement was visible. i was fully devoted to making the best out of my professors and classes, while also getting to know about the university’s resources for academic and extracurricular endeavors. i would spend hours invested on homework, then work as if there was no tomorrow, and sometimes spend the rest of the day working on an extracurricular project. some days, i would even forget to do simple things, such as eating nourishing meals or taking time to speak to my family and friends back home. initially, i was able to sustain that hectic lifestyle. however, as time passed by, my excitement was replaced by a feeling of discomfort, which started as a slight distress, but eventually grew bigger and started to demand more of my attention, until i could not ignore it any longer. throughout this first semester, i saw myself trying to constantly balance my academic life with working part-time and managing my own finances. although this was initially simple, it started to become a hard task when my first midterms came by. during this time, i would constantly compare myself to my peers, and feel bad for not achieving the highest marks or participating in five different clubs. however, as time passed by, i noticed how our backgrounds were different, and how focusing on my journey should be my greatest priority. this way, when reading julia hogan’s text on letting go of someone else’s expectations (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine), i realized that giving too much importance to the way people expect you to behave may not make you the protagonist of your own life. however, coming to that realization was not enough to keep me away from “breaking”: having to deal with intense academic, professional and personal demands was feasible at first, but i soon noticed that it was not sustainable. because i would usually occupy myself with these activities, i barely had time to get proper sleep or to meet with my friends. this slowly increased my level of fatigue, which i ignored until it started to affect me on a basic level. suddenly, going to classes became a huge challenge, and that was when i realized that i needed help. although i am still in a healing process, i try to see this experience as a learning opportunity: it taught me how to interpret signs of exhaustion, which will hopefully help me not to face the same situation https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau in the future. this reminds me of the art of seeing beauty in brokenness, something i learned about when watching a video about the “kintsugi” technique (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). additionally, going through the experience i mentioned also helped me to understand that i could count on the friendships i have made thus far at notre dame. from lending me class notes to staying with me when i was feeling at my lowest, my friends helped me in several ways. in palmer’s text on community (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven), i encountered numerous similarities to my college experience, one of them being the importance of receptiveness to receiving help. throughout my life, i have always tried not to rely on others, since i believed i would become a burden to them. however, my experience at notre dame taught me that learning to give and receive help is one of the key points to building solid relationships: being vulnerable enough to seek and offer support was a powerful tool to becoming more connected to my peers. lastly, my first semester at notre dame taught me a lot about fostering hope. feeling hopeful about the others, about my future the list goes on. for moreau’s week twelve activity, my question was, “how can i manage to maintain my hope even in moments of crisis?” now, i realize how fr. james b. king’s text (“hope holy cross and christian education" by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve) might have given me that answer. when reading the excerpt about hope, i better understood how to implement it in my daily life: by understanding that each phase of my life is part of a greater process, and that trusting it can help me to deal with any significant changes that may occur in my personal path. now, i understand that this is an effective way to remain hopeful when going through a difficult time. my first semester of college was very eventful: i was able to not only develop myself academically and professionally, but also personally. although this brought me difficult challenges at times, i prefer to see the value those experiences brought to my life. from finally understanding what a derivative is to better managing my emotions, being a part of notre dame’s community has been a huge learning experience. this way, my expectations for the next year include continuing to develop myself academically and personally, while being mindful about my mental and physical well-being. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465/download?download_frd=1 integration 2 assignment this semester has been a journey that i could never have imagined. coming from a small town in southern minnesota where the only people who got into notre dame were families with generations of connections to the school, i felt lost. whether i admit it or not, i have experienced imposter syndrome. in such a competitive environment at notre dame, “people who are highly skilled or accomplished tend to think others are just as skilled. this can spiral into feelings that they don’t deserve accolades and opportunities over other people… and there’s often no threshold of accomplishment that puts these feelings to rest” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). from this quote, i have realized that these feelings may never vanish, yet i have the opportunity each day to tell myself that i am worthy and valued. i achieved great things to get here, and i will achieve great things while i’m here. these positive thoughts personally need to be transitioned to action to fulfill my dream. currently, i am struggling to take the first step in these processes as there are many paths to take, and i am unaware of the correct or most efficient one. this may be a battle of encountering failure, but all i need to do is take the first step. i always had a black and white plan i needed to follow in high school, like getting a’s, doing well on big tests, and contributing to my community, but coming to notre dame, there are so many paths to take. many strive to get good grades, but others prioritize their club activities yet still experience great success once they graduate. it is this new opaqueness that greatly troubles me. however, i have realized that i should pursue what i am interested in, and with feedback from upperclassmen, try not to worry about a harsh professor or a class that just doesn’t go your way grade-wise. one thing that has become clearer to me since i’ve arrived on campus is the overwhelming opportunity the university itself offers and the expanse of the alumni network. it is not an opportunity that reaches its hand out and pulls you along, but it is something that you must reach for. it is a process that feels somewhat dirty to me as i feel like i’m using people, but i hope that instead of thinking that way, i can see it as forming genuine connections with people who know more than i do. the first thing i must do is take the initiative and make these new connections. nothing comes to you in life when you sit on the couch and hope. no one got to this school by being lazy, so why would i change my ways and become lazy. i need to be even more fervent in my future endeavors, no matter how unclear they are. no matter how i am trying to change or grow, it will be difficult.“change is difficult but more possible when we see and hear multiple voices” (“diversity matters” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). this semester, my engineering class has had a significant focus on our major discernment, and this process of discernment brings this quote to life. i initially thought i wanted to go into aerospace engineering. still, our required meetings with upperclassmen, hearing multiple voices interpret my scenario, and revisiting my goals for my college experience and beyond have pushed me to change my major to mechanical engineering. this change was difficult as i was very set on aerospace coming in, but through the process of hearing multiple voices, this change has become easier, and now i see a better path forward. through mechanical engineering, it will give me a broader engineering background to enter into the medical devices field. my goal is to one day help people similar to my family so that no one has to experience the pain i see them endure daily. coming to notre dame as a catholic, i was astonished by the presence of catholicism on campus. it was unlike what i was expecting based on the way our world is trending today. it was a welcomed surprise, and i believe it has welcomed benefits as well. throughout my first four months here, i have only met a handful of people who have been outright rude to me, and i think this has a big responsibility regarding the catholic presence on campus. simple conversations that i have with strangers always leave me smiling, and with that, this quote stuck out to me. “and if we are determined to keep our convictions free of malice, then i propose that we strive to meet one simple test for public discourse: our attempts to express our convictions should take the form of an effort to persuade” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). through the catholic presence on this campus, i believe it is through the catholic presence that notre dame not only attracts but grows young men and women who will contribute wholesomely to our world. it is through the requirements of theology and philosophy credits that i attribute this wholesome campus atmosphere because, as father james said, “no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus… in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope” (“hope holy cross and christian education” pages 14-16 by father james b. king). even if my theology professor makes me put in a lot more effort and time than other theology professors, it has ultimately led me to a better understanding of my faith. i often find myself in pangborn’s chapel reflecting on the day. the chapel in my dorm is a great way to escape all the campus commotion and thoughts in my head regarding worthiness. it provides me a place of peace where i can let all my insecurities and worries go for a short time. through this atmosphere, i am happy to now call notre dame my home for the next four years. in losing , we lost someone who knew himself, loved and lived for others, and built the life-giving relationships that to him, defined a life-well lived. many struggle with self-identity and feel overwhelmed by the speed of the modern world, but luke had strong self-knowledge and confidence in himself that kept him grounded and focused through all challenges in his life. in his article “why we need to slow down our lives”, pico iyer writes “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (week 1). not only did luke have a clear vision of what his canvas looked like and how he wanted it to look, he was the artist, making the canvas conform to his vision no matter the obstacles that stood before him. in college, he faced obstacles in integrating into the community early on but that did not that stop him from painting his college canvas into what he wanted to be. he had a drive self-confidence that allowed him to succeed in the classroom and in the community, while also keeping a broad view of his future and how we wanted to live his life. but it initially took him time had to learn to take a step back. coming into college, he was nervous that the academic tracks at the school were limiting in terms of future paths, but he took one piece of advice to heart: “so you can relax and put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major. it’s much more complex than that...but also much more exciting.” (week 4). once he realized the future has a wide array of possibilities regardless of what you study, he took off studying and pursuing what interested him and never looked back. throughout his career he always had the bigger picture of his life in mind, and that helped lead him to a life well-lived. luke also was strong in his convictions. former notre dame president fr. hesburgh once said “i took a stand for something, and i wasn’t about to stop.” (week 2). despite facing challenges from people around him at times, he stayed true to what he thought was right, believing that fighting for equity, diversity, and inclusion was more important than upholding community standards or traditions. he did not proclaim himself to be a serious activist or take undue credit for drastic social change but stood up for what he believed for on small scales and did not let himself be changed by others. this plays into his general life theme of strong self-knowledge and confidence in who he was. his self-knowledge was where he was strongest. he was happy and confident in who he was and didn’t feel the need to change for anyone. firstly, he had good perspective—once he learned to look at the whole canvas, he was able to make every stroke of his brush with the image in mind. that is not to say that he overstated the importance of every little decision, but rather he knew that because of the grand nature of the painting of life, he did not stress as much over small things and was able to make decisions with confidence. for example, many suffer from decision paralysis—when a big decision makes one unable to make a choice—but because of his ability to put decisions into perspective and confidence in himself to make the best out of the decision he made, he was able to have peace in his choices. for example, when deciding to quit baseball—the sport he had been playing his whole life—to pursue water polo, he was able to commit to it in a heartbeat. it may have seemed like a big decision in terms of magnitude but was not a difficult one at all. his ability to be confident and make decisions served him well in his life. he was able to build his strong self-knowledge and confidence through a delicate balance between introspection and caution of over self-analyzing. firstly, his sense of perspective of the canvas was helped by keeping in mind the nature of his own mortality. in college, he learned of ways to do this: sr. alethia noble said, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as continuing and continuing.” (week 3). for him, it was still somewhat grim, and he didn’t feel the need to go as far as to meditate on death every day. but he felt that at least one moment of introspection can be helpful. he also found self-identity and confidence by not over-analyzing himself and steering clear frequent deep ‘reflection’ and ‘introspection’. when turning inwards, he lived by the following: “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future.” (tasha eurich week 6) instead of looking for reasons for everything and justifying his unhappiness, he looked for ways to improve. he gained insight rather and introspection and lived in this spirit. one example of this solution-based thinking is his approach to obstacles. instead of looking at why he was annoyed with his circumstances and blaming the obstacles themselves, he asked what he could do about them. he looked at what he could control, did his best in that respect, and didn’t worry about anything else. when he was in college, he did his best in his classes and social life but let everything else that he couldn’t control happen. luke also learned from those around him. in his quest for self-knowledge, he talked to people close to him to get an outside perspective on his own life. (week 5). he heard from others that he was honest, confident—sometimes arrogant—but confident, and focused. the beliefs and values apparent to others matched his internal values, reinforcing that he was true in his identity. his self-knowledge, perspective, and confidence were important parts of what luke defined as a life-well lived, as these traits helped guide him to that life. but more important than all else to his life well-lived were his connections to others. he lived his life in community with family and friends, and those relationships were the core of his life experience. his family—sisters, parents, grandparents—and friends made his life better, and he wanted nothing more than to have a positive impact on their lives. he always said, “if there is one thing i could do with my life, it would be for those i held close to me with to have positive memories of me and our time together.” the things he liked to do for fun—water-ski, travel, see nature—were all enhanced by sharing them with others. he tried to build community networks in his life that brought people together and helped everyone lived lives well lived. “how wonderful would it be if the growth of scientific and technological innovation, would come along with more equality and social inclusion. how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us. how wonderful would it be if solidarity, this beautiful and at times inconvenient word were not simply reduced to social work and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic, and scientific choices as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples, and countries.” (pope francis week 7). one last note: luke believed that he lived a life-well lived through his relationships, knowledge of himself, and the simple everyday activities that made life great (sports, exercise, seeing the world, etc.) but he wants everyone listening here today that not all lives well-lived look that same. they may share common characteristics, like community, but what you find joy and fulfillment can be different to person. the one thing that must be done first however, is to know yourself. before you can pain the canvas, you need to know what paint to use. moreau integration 2 close encounters of the real kind the last thirteen weeks have been surreal and full of stories and experiences that i will cherish for a long time. i have had so many new experiences since arriving in southbend, but regardless of what has happened, i have had some of the most genuine people there to have my back. in my lowest moments, i have never been alone. there were many points, especially early on, where i felt like i did not belong at a prestigious university like notre dame. because nobody else seemed to be struggling, i thought i was not good enough to be here. i thought i always had to be perfect no matter what. however, i quickly realized that this was an irrational expectation i set on myself. even more, i noticed that my friends were struggling just as much at times, but at the end of the day, we got through it together. in fact, julia hogan notes this exact phenomenon in her article that “when we meet (or surpass) [expectations], we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). in this quote, hogan makes a point that the expectations set by ourselves and peers can have detrimental effects on one’s mental health. she makes a good point, especially for people already more prone to anxiety and depression, but i think she fails to see this optimistically. for instance, i generally follow the same philosophy of feeling good when i meet my self-made expectations, but when i do not achieve them, i do not fret on it too much. instead, i understand what mistake i made and learn from it. again, this is the more optimistic approach to this notion, and i understand that this is difficult for many people to do. nonetheless, it is how i personally perceive my achievements and failures, but i can understand how negativity could warp this thought process. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau to avoid this, i have actively been reminding myself that no mistake is so bad that i cannot learn from it and i carry on. hogan dances around the concept of impostor syndrome seen at many colleges across the united states, which was discussed more thoroughly in elizabeth cox’s tedtalk (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). cox was extremely accurate in effectively illustrating how to cope with the imposter syndrome. she holds that facilitating an open discussion of anxiety is the most successful way in helping people dispel false perceptions of themselves. showing that they are not alone quells these worries and allows people to be openly vulnerable and less lonely. this is the type of environment that my dorm cultivated from the moment i stepped out of the car to unpack my belonging. the upperclassman were more than happy to answer questions, give advice, and be your friend, while the other freshmen followed suit to preserve this energy. in short, being alone versus being loved can make all the difference. additionally, i believe that this solution can be applied to so much more than the imposter syndrome. open discussions can be, and have been, largely fruitful in dealing with depression, ptsd, and other types of mental trauma. in fact, my cousins founded a charity called paws for patrick with this very ideology to give support to teenagers with mental illness. they regularly preach that “it’s okay not to be okay” in order to break the stigma around depression and anxiety. regardless, i deeply enjoyed cox’s message and hope it continues to be normalized in our society, as it personally helps me and the people around me feel better. many of the friends i have made so far are from extremely diverse backgrounds, and i have figured out how to learn about other people’s values politely, which is extremely important in breaking down racial inequalities. it has become evident to me this semester that we must https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo address these inequalities, not ignore them. interestingly enough, christopher j. devron asserts that “although francis and c.s.t. deviate from critical race theory in other areas, their approach to systemic racism is similar: white people don’t get a moral pass by simply refraining from overtly racist acts” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week 10). i love this quote because devron calls out the silent majority because even though they are not doing anything, their idleness is part of the problem. in other words, just because most of us are not ostensibly racist does not mean we are not contributing to the problem. racism is rooted in our society, so it takes so much more than passive action to fix it. by inhibiting discussion, we are inhibiting our understanding of other point of views, and thereby enabling racism to continuing affecting all facets of life, even if we do not realize it. i find it refreshing that a member of the clergy has taken a stance on this issue, rather than omitting it from catholic social teaching. as a result, i have been trying to be more conscious of any social injustice, especially since attending greendot training. beyond race, i believe that every individual’s life, regardless of race or gender, is different and we should address them as such, which is emphasized by the klau center archive on race (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). that is, we cannot generalize an entire group of people based on a few common stories. i could not agree more with this philosophy, particularly because this is how i was taught to treat others growing up and what i have built on at notre dame when meeting new people. however, i believe the implication is that if a group of people is experiencing some injustice, then the community as a whole needs to step in. not just local communities, but the national community. furthermore, we should not create or consolidate stereotypes based on https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://voicestrue.nd.edu what some individuals in a group experience. i think this message contributes to the broader theme of respect for others. you should try and get to know people before judging their character, not because they are part of a group that is known for a certain trait. consequently, i have consciously begun asking people about themselves and their own experiences, rather than assuming they are the same as people of the same race or gender. perhaps the greatest thing i have adapted to in college is coping with constant change. there is no getting around it: college is change. the screwtape letters even states that “[humans’] newest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation—the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). even though this quote was written in the context of religion, it holds greater meaning in the nature of humans. it demonstrates how no person is perfect and everybody makes mistakes, but the key is to always come back better. to learn from your mistakes, rather than keep making them, and to forgive yourself for them. otherwise, life will bog you down with the weight of the world and even the simplest task will seem impossible. overall, learning from mistakes is something that has been a staple of my life ever since i could remember, and something that is exceptionally important in college life. in my short time in southbend, i have encountered both new and old situations, but how i go about them is often different than i would in the past. i am generally not a confrontational person, so normally, i have been a bystander much of my life. now, if one of my friends is down, i will be there for them. if someone is being bullied in any way, i will intervene. altogether, i want to work to be a less passive person. while i may falter with this at times, i will remind myself that if i do not do something, it is likely that no one else will either. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186053?module_item_id=102829 roll with the punches in one week i will finish my very first semester of college! this comes with excitement, anxiety, and many more emotions that i can't even begin to list. this semester has been an extreme period of growth. the biggest hardships i’ve ever faced on my own. i went from a straight-a student who wouldn't accept anything but perfection, to trying my hardest to pass my classes with a 60%. the bad grades came with harmful comparisons to my peers, inflicting the thought upon myself that i’m not good enough to be here. that i’m not good enough or smart enough to succeed at this prestigious college. i looked at friend's social media accounts from state schools back home and it looked like the college experience i’d always dreamed of, the parties, the girls, the going out on a tuesday night. “i evaluated every picture my friends posted, determining whether their college looked like more fun than mine if they had made more friends than i had, just meaningless justifications for my unhappiness.” (week 9 “advice from a formerly lonely college student” emery bergmann) then i took a step back, evaluated my morals, and realized i chose notre dame for a reason. the common saying “you are who you hang around with” jumped to my attention, i want to be with hardworking, well-rounded people, not alcoholic party animals that devote themselves to petty fraternities. when i came to this conclusion everything changed. not to say i didn't still struggle with school but i started to give in to the culture and found myself making more friends and establishing more connections just because i decided to give it a fair chance. i found that i am not an imposter and i am not the only one struggling with this transition. the transition from being a cocky straight-a athlete who didn't treat everyone with the kindness and respect they deserved also began to take place. in high school, i made a lot of mistakes. some mistakes were minor and healthy and others i will never be proud of. this class forced me to think about my goals and morals. “self-reflection is important because we need to find the routes”(week 10) the world these days sometimes goes overboard with giving everyone a trophy, saying good job where credit isn't due. the maturity it takes to self-reflect and criticizes your own actions and morals is not only necessary but invaluable. in week 5 i felt i was cultivating my mind at the expense of the heart, poorly managing my time, and going through the motions like a robot. when i learned to place my mental health ahead of my school work i started to do better in school too. how would one even begin to grow as a person if they never devoted any time to it? like wanting to get bigger and stronger but never going to the gym. one of the main things i've learned from my time here is taking even 10 minutes to reflect and depict what attributes about myself need to stay and what attributes need to go. one concept that seemed to return since week 7 was the fault of a single story. “it is up to us to grow as a community, seeking connection with someone we may not usually be inclined to talk to. it all comes back to seeking someone's full story and not just their single story. not judging a book by its cover some might say.” (week 11) i am not a single story and niether is anyone. i may have made poor decisions in the past but i’ve also done lots of good. i have been overjoyed finding the good in others this semester. a new set of friends that continues to grow. each individual with a unique upbringing and story. i personally didnt think i’d find myself with friends that i can share important and meaningful things with this early in my college career. my faith has also grown with and within my new friendships.” ‘the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please him best.’ this quote sticks out to me most because sometimes i only turn to the lord when i need him. my connection with the lord is weaker when my life is going good, then when things start to fall apart and become more difficult i turn back to the lord for help.” (week 12 the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis) turning to the lord in states of dryness has become more frequent by ten fold. i try to pray at least once a day even when i dont need anything. i have made it a goal to live more directly within him and walk by his side day my day. this has not only gave me more hope but more confidence in all i do. if i were to go back and talk to my pastself in august, i would be proud of how far i’ve come. i am growing in the direction i see beneficial and have established more concrete morals within myself. although we were taught to treat other as we would like to be treater at a very young age, i feel like i have finally began to embody this in my day to day life. the full story of every person is not meant to be indulged lightly. seeking the differences in everyones story is more important than studying a textbook for an examine. i will learn more throughout my college experience from others than i will from classes or else i will be disappointed in myself and my goals. i plan to continue to reflect upon myself as well as shape myself into the man i want to be. “i will work hard to seek the full story instead of forming someone else’s story in my head prematurely.” (week7). seeking the full story not only in others but in the bigger picture of morals and life is something that will stick with me forever. i am excited to see what my future holds and i know have the strength to achieve whatever i want through the lord and through a positive attitude and kind personality. integration essay being true to my true beliefs root beliefs can be difficult to understand and comprehend when it comes to your own. after much thinking, i have come to realize that some a my root beliefs are the following: i believe that i am made to help others, i believe that i grow by being vulnerable, i believe that i am searching for hope and for reasons to keep me motivated everyday, and i believe that my community should be accepting of everyone regardless of people’s individual differences. i will attempt to further describe and expand on my root beliefs as i go forward, although this is not a small task since root beliefs can be ever so intricate and in-depth. one of the most important root beliefs that i hold, is that i believe that i grow by being vulnerable. i think that the best way for me to be a better person is to share my story with others. i think this helps both me and the other person develop a greater sense of meaning in our lives because we are able to help each other feel loved and cared for even if this is hard to do. being able to feel worthy of love and belonging is the first step to actually feeling loved (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) and i think that by sharing parts of my story that causes me to be more vulnerable is important to open up in order to feel better connected to others, hence developing a sense of belongingness. i have practiced doing this here at notre dame by opening up to people i have met about the struggles i have faced and am still facing at college. opening up about my eating disorder has allowed me to feel a deeper sense of connectedness with others because they get to know me better and then they are more likely to open up to me so i can get to know them better. i have also grown by being vulnerable in the classroom. i have challenged myself to ask questions when i am confused about something, specifically in my calculus class. by asking questions in class i have demonstrated letting my guard down and showing people that i am not as put together and as seemingly perfect as one might think without truly getting to know me. as david brooks would explain, i am working on fighting adam 2 because adam 2 compels me to want to hide my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be weaknesses and sins rather than allow other people to see this in me to help me when i need it (“"should you live for your resumé... or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). not only am i trying to be more vulnerable, but i am also trying to live out my root belief of i believe that i am searching for hope and reason to stay motivated each day. oftentimes, i find it difficult to stay hopeful during hard times and stay motivated to continue to go to college and keep up the work so i can receive the grades that i want. one of the reasons that i find it hard to be hopeful sometimes is because i feel that my eating disorder causes me to struggle a lot so my mind gets wrapped up thinking about the issues that arise from this and then i can begin to feel on the verge of wanting to give up and stop trying to recover from this illness. not only does this make it difficult to have hope, but i also find it difficult to have motivation all the time. i find that i get caught in “cycles” where i am very unmotivated because everything seems too overwhelming to even try to confront. going forward i want to try to find more sources of hope and more things that keep me motivated during tough times. in my future i am thinking about trying to delve deeper into faith to possibly help give me hope and motivation because, “hope is confident because it rests upon god’s power, not our own” (“"faith brings light to a dark world" by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). i want to work on learning how to better understand god because i think this could be a way that would give me more hope in my life. i will continue to search for hope and motivation in my own life, but i also like to help others find this in their life too. i believe that i am made to help others. i feel that my purpose on earth is to give back to others who are less fortunate than i am. i do not see any other option than helping those in need because i think this is inherently what you are supposed to do and is the nicest thing you can do for other people. whether it be helping serve breakfast at a homeless shelter back in my hometown, or helping the person who sits next to me with their chemistry homework, i think that any action of helping others is necessary and the right thing to do. it makes me feel good to help other people because i know i am making a positive https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=en https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau difference in someone else’s life. i want to make sure that anyone who helps me is also offered the same help back because “nothing feels worse than being used in a relationship” (“"5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i think it is only fair to pay kindness forward whether it be to the person that helped you or even to someone else in need. i also find it very important that when you are helping someone with schoolwork here at nd that you need to help with an open mind. what i mean by this is that many people find something difficult that i may not find difficult and vice versa. i think that it is important to always realize that, even at college, everyone is always students and teachers ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). not only do i think realizing this is important but also putting this into practice. this helps me realize that no one is better than me so it is okay if i need help and vice versa. this allows others to ask for help and then i am able to pay it forward and help others. not only do i feel that helping others is only of my root beliefs, but i also believe that diversity is super important. i believe that my community should accept everyone regardless of an individual’s differences compared to what is considered “normal” in society. i think our moreau class and nd in general is very good at accepting everyone regardless of differences. for example, it is encouraged to be your true self and the students that go here seem to follow this value as well. this is important to me because i wanted to feel that the college i went to was accepting of everyone because it helps me to be more vulnerable and stay true to myself. as we wrote the “where i am from poems”, i think that the advice of “learn[ing] to let it lead you” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six), was important when we were trying to write our poems. this quote also makes me think of other instances in life where i think that people should simply go with the flow. i think that people should learn to embrace the differences that others have whether it comes to gender, social class, seual orientation, etc. because the differences among our society allow us to have a greater spark to our life since everyone is not all the same. likewise, i think that my community should be less judgemental. i https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html think that nd does a very good job of minimizing this because there are many clubs on campus that allow students to join and then get to know people with similar values as them. however, in other parts of the city/state/country, i wish that people would not be as judgemental. specifically, i wish that things were not as political as they seem to be lately. it seems as though diversity and politics are linked and i do not like or understand why this occurs. i think this leads to people not getting along even more because if people disagree politically then they “often assume the problem [with others] is intellectual” ("how to destroy truth" by david brooks moreau week seven). this can lead to toxic relationships or even previous positive relationships being ruined if people feel so strongly about one thing and are not open to the differing beliefs that other people have. not only do i feel that it is important to accept everyone but i also believe in helping clothes, being vulnerable, and i am searching for hope and reasons to be motivated. these root beliefs help me live my life everyday aligned with my core values and stay on a path of the life i desire to live. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare real cultivating my belief system at notre dame tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 cultivating my belief system at notre dame to begin my integration, i want to address who i was before entering this class and in an even more general spectrum, joining the community that is the university of notre dame. before, i was a suburban georgian inhabitant, a high school student, and a scared teen dreading the stressful future ahead. now i don’t think i derived far from my past self in terms of fears and identity, but i can certainly say that the way i have adapted to the anxiety and insecurities that ruled my life has changed. by responding to the prompts in this class, i have formed beliefs to help myself grow into a better, more balanced person emotionally and mentally, and for that, i am grateful for taking this moreau class. i believe that i can pursue truth by being courageous and true to myself. this belief stems from the first week’s assignment where i watched a captivating ted talk by dr. brown. one particular line that stood out to me was, “courage… the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). from this, i realized how i want to be authentic with myself and other people. brown emphasized how it takes courage to be vulnerable, and i decided to bask in my own discomfort and open myself up to new people, especially in my college experience. ever since i came to notre dame, i have talked to many people. domerfest was a social melting pot, and the tran 2 overall welcome weekend gave me dozens of snapchats, instagrams, and phone numbers. however, the real problem was following up with all of these contacts, and that was where courage came in. i can confidently say that a large fraction of these initial people are barely acquaintances to me, but for the few people i did actively text back and meet up with, i was able to be vulnerable and develop a relationship with them. simply stated, i am progressing well at having more courage to put myself out there, but i hope that in the coming years, i can be a “cool” upperclassmen like the upperclassmen i have met, and i can help underclassmen come out of their shells to live a fun notre dame life. moreover, i believe that i am on a journey to find myself. according to father pete, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). there are many pathways that i am going to pass through: i have already finished my route through elementary school, high school, and i am currently in my teen years, just starting my college life. nonetheless, it is important for me to understand that the true pathway that i am on is one to find myself, through challenges, failures, successes, and overall experiences. so far at notre dame, an experience that is progressing me further in my journey to find myself is how i have performed much worse than i did in high school, and it has taken a toll on my mental health. these biology and chemistry classes are much tougher than my high school classes, but i have learned to adjust and move forward, making myself a more resilient person. i hope that i continue picking myself up after failures because i am proud to still be standing. i also believe that i am made to love others. this may seem like a straightforward statement, but the meaning of love stems much deeper than this, which is conveyed through tran 3 brook’s line, “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone, therefore we must be saved by love” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). brook’s quote reveals how the current american fantasy of working hard and achieving success and money is not a valid way to achieve fulfillment; instead, a commitment that will last a lifetime will garner true fulfillment, and the approach i want to take in terms of this is to share love with other people. although this may be hard for me since i am a stem major at the university of notre dame and my focus is always on school for my future, i want to spend time helping other people, whether it's by studying with them, opening the door for them, or just simple actions to make someone's day. i have a small hobby of complimenting one person a day on anything, and i hope to elevate my love in stronger ways, such as baking cookies for my dorm or volunteering in underserved communities. i wholly believe that i forge true relationships by growing with another person and enjoying my time with them. as taylor portrays, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there,” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i have been creating and procreating friendships throughout my life, and my most significant relationships were formed during high school with five amazing girls. however, i left them all back home for college, and i felt so empty without them; they were the ones where i would leave a hangout, sleepover, or even just a conversation with a smile. i felt like i would struggle to build new relationships here at notre dame, but i soon realized that i did not have to form so many relationships. within my first week here, i made a new friend, antaya, who would later be someone i would hang out with everyday, someone i could talk about tran 4 anything with and be there for, and someone i could wholeheartedly smile with. i know that i will maintain this healthy relationship with her and other peers as i find “my people” at notre dame. i believe that my time on earth is priceless. harris in her laetare medal acceptance speech enunciates, “we can always get more money, more houses, cars, and things, we can never get more time” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). through this quote, i found that time is one thing we humans can never get back. once it is used up, it’s gone forever, and because of this point, my time should be invested beyond just attaining success. therefore, i need to focus on what is in the present instead of obsessing over my hopefully prosperous “future.” i have fostered this into my life by spontaneously making plans with other people. one of my favorite encounters was when my dorm neighbor invited me out to fall mall, but i had an optional freshman meeting at the same time. i ended up missing the meeting and went to fall mall with her, got a tapestry, and had the best time making a new friend. i want to fill my life with precious memories like this instead of working like a machine for time that has yet to come. another thing, i believe that i am here to expose my origins to other people, and to teach others. from a poem written by myself, i wrote: all the luxuries in america can’t compare to the heart that is found in vietnam plus grit and strength (“my origin” by moreau fye week six) tran 5 my past is much different from a majority of the students i attend the university of notre dame with. the primary difference is how many notre dame students come from parents who have a college education (possibly notre dame alums), white picket fence houses, and catholic/private schools, and i do not have any of those things. instead, i come from vietnamese immigrants, a jagged homemade-wooden fence, and helping my parents file taxes. we are from different backgrounds, but we live in the same world. i get to learn so much from the students here, like how different school systems work, what countries people have traveled to, and in return, i tell fellow students about my home of a majority minority population and public school stories. i am helping notre dame to further become a melting pot of different people all aiming to achieve success at our prestigious university. i believe that i pursue truth by avoiding implicit bias and determining the truth by my own experience and research. from one of my favorite ted talks, adichie states, “all of these stories make me who i am, but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this exposes the tendency for people to allow their predispositions and implicit biases to characterize a person instead of their actual personality. after realizing such an intertwined condition in american society, i am putting more effort into getting to know a person more, instead of basing my impression of a person based on their looks. i have done this so far by walking up to white people, which were a rare “race” back in my hometown, and learning about them personally. i have met many different people from this, some new friends and some acquaintances, and i am not judging them based on society’s tran 6 stereotypes of them. as i meet more unique people here at notre dame, i hope to truly know those i cross paths with. ever since i saw hannah montana go to college in 2011, i have been working hard for a great college experience, but it is not all that meets the media’s eyes. college includes a lot of stress, from the academic stress of the course load to social stress of feeling of fomo (fear of missing out) and that you have to find your best friends in college or get a “ring before spring,” a traditional joke where college freshmen find their true love and get engaged by the spring semester. both stressors have really taken their toll on me, but i am resilient, and i choose to take the failures i have accumulated so far in college, from getting bad summative grades to being socially awkward, and growing from them with the help of my core beliefs. i want to build true relationships with people, getting rid of implicit biases and toxic relationships, and i want to take care of myself, find myself, and love myself and others. college is just a time in my life to grow, like every other part of my life, and this time is valuable. i cannot wait to develop myself over these coming years at notre dame, and although i hope my future self is thriving, i will focus on the present and work up from there. integration 2 brian reaume integration two 3 december 2021 the realization of encounters and responses there are many questions to ask when it comes to new encounters and the way that me or someone around me may respond. the four questions that are included for me to answer in this integration assignment have helped guide me to answering the overall question of “what have i encountered and how will i respond?”. in this second integration assignment i have assigned one question to each week's qqc that i have completed throughout this second half of the semester. throughout this second half of the semester i have been able to reflect and grow a friend, sister and daughter but also as a person as a whole. throughout this semester as a whole i have encountered so much that have helped me to grow into the person that i am today. in these four months i can confidently say that i am a different person, for the better, than i was when i walked into notre dame as a freshman. i have encountered many challenges throughout my studies in classes. i have learned how to respond to these challenges by taking a deep breath and remembering to take each assignment one at a time and to the best of my ability. although i have tackled so much throughout my studies here at notre dame the biggest challenge that i encountered was saying goodbye to my family. this goodbye was well anticipated making it even harder than i thought it would be. when i actually encountered the goodbye, yes it was just as difficult as i thought it would be but the way i responded to the aftermath was better than i ever imagined. i went on to distract myself by going out and meeting new people, socializing, engaging in my classes and signing up for clubs and activities around campus. this first step that i took in the beginning of the semester set me up to approach my encounters differently and allowed me to view how i respond to each encounterment i have with flying colors and i am so happy that i can say that. in week nine’s qqc the quote that stood out to me the most was, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). there were lots of examples throughout the article that showed the burdens that people put on themselves to live up to the expectations set up by society. i have connected this quote to answer the question of “what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated?” i believe that this quote and question go hand and hand when you read them as when we were little kids everything was black and white. as we grew up we could do whatever we really wanted (of course if it was ok with our parents) but what really mattered was we did not care what people thought. now, it is very much more colorful as everyone tries to live up to the expectations of society and sometimes allow themselves to break down while trying to do so. i have used this quote as a learning experience for me to take into account when i encounter situations just like what is shown here. i now feel as if i react to situations where i feel society's expectations are being pressured on me. ever since i got to college i believe that i have been able to hold my own expectations and follow what i want to follow without the influence of others or society. i am so grateful that i have come to this realization of a response. in week ten’s qqc the quote that stood out to me the most was “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” message from fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10) . this quote is very important for all to hear as it gives lessons that can be valuable to all, young and old. the question that i connected to this quote was: “what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity?”. just as i mentioned before, when we were younger life was much simpler. reading this quote at a young age, while still valuable to those who are younger, may be complicated and a little vague to them as they may not know the full meaning of what it is exactly trying to convey. now older and wiser i am able to have a greater clarity of this quote. this example is very reflective to many life situations that we all encounter on a daily basis. we now look at life with a new set of eyes than we did when we were younger. this connected back to the encounters and reactions as now with more experience i have encountered more and this gives me an insight on how to react in a more mature way. in week eleven’s qqc the quote that stood out to me the most was, “so exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change” (“diversity matters” by professor agistim fuentes moreau fye week 11). this quote places an emphasis on diversity and how important it is to our world. we need diversity in our everyday lives in order to be our own people. if everyone was the same the world would be so different and nothing special. each and every person has something special to offer to the world. the question that i connected to this quote is “what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far?” i can confidently say that the diversity that i have been immersed in here at notre dame has definitely increased in importance to me as a result of my notre dame journey. while there was some diversity at my high school there was not nearly the same amount https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 as there is here at notre dame. i am so grateful for the opportunity to go here and experience the diversity that notre dame has. i am no longer in the “bubble” that i grew up in and i am able to grow as a person through my interactions with others. i have had a wide variety of encounters with many people here at notre dame and each encounter has helped shape how i respond on an everyday basis. in week twelve’s qqc the quote that stood out to me the most was, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week 12). this quote shows how jesus is an inspiration that many people of the catholic faith follow and look up to. people use jesus as a guide to live out their daily lives to the best of their ability and to the fullest they can. the question that i have connected to this quote is “what are some of the most important questions i've asked this semester?” i have been able to connect this question with this quote in the way that i have asked myself the question as to whether or not i am living my life to the fullest and trying my best at everything i come in contact with. whether it is school work or friendships i always want to make sure i am carrying it out to the fullest. i have always known that if i encounter something that may be a challenge jesus and my faith will always be there for me but it has become more evident to me throughout my time here at notre dame as these values have been instilled in me and my learning. all four of these qqc’s have helped me to realize who the person i have become is and have also helped me to reflect in ways that i never have thought about. i am so grateful that notre dame offers moreau as it has really helped me transition into college and make sure i take https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/files/188847?module_item_id=105685 time to reflect on what is happening and has happened in my life. i really enjoyed taking this class this semester and i can not wait to see what next semester has in store for me. ms. wagner moreau fye 12/3/21 despite my high school having the moniker of “college prep” it has prepared me for college in few ways aside from academics. the environment i am in and the experiences i have had in and outside of the classroom are nothing like what i was expected or even was told to expect. i have experienced some of the first failures and disappointments in my life so far. i set high physical goals for myself, despite no longer being a competitive athlete, and it is safe to say i have not reached them. my grades are lower than i would prefer, and, although i have loved my social life here on campus, i have faced adversity here as well. it is safe to say that i have not hit all of my expectations coming to school, thus far. many in society, especially those studying psychology or behavior related fields warn about the dangers of high expectations. julia hogan explained such a thought when she wrote, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (julia hogan, grotto moreau fye week 9). while this statement is true: it is dangerous if you feel unworthy as a human by not meeting high expectations, it is a derivative of this mindset that tells young people not to set goals for the sake of your emotions. a message like that is poisonous. i have also let myself down this semester by not setting high expectations for myself in certain areas. the lack of expectations was detrimental to my work ethic and overall performance. i would rather be disappointed in myself for falling short of high goals, than not even trying to achieve my full potential. over the course of the semester, i have asked myself questions that boil down to whether i would rather succeed at something easy or struggle with something more difficult. given what i stated earlier, i seem to prefer the latter. that is why i do not entirely agree with hogan’s message, and in spite of the adversity i have experienced, academically, physically, and in other ways since arriving at notre dame, i will continue to set high expectations for myself, and maintain self-discipline. i have also experienced many differing viewpoints since the beginning of school. those from other regions, countries, cultures, and races have shown me a lot about themselves, often in ways that i do not totally understand. it is not at all surprising to look back and recognize how diversity has changed your viewpoint. prof. agustin fuentes, in a video entitled “diversity matter” described diversity as, “access to different types of people, life experiences, and ways of seeing the world, which offers insight (prof. agustin fuentes, moreau fys week 9).” the “which offers insight” phrase is the one that i have learned even more since arriving here. any student could easily define diversity as the list the prof. fuentes used in the first half of that sentence. the portion about offering insight must be experienced. one obvious example from my time here so far is learning from others in cultures that talk less than we do in america (which is just about every culture come to think about it). they do not need to fill up every empty second with their ideas, but instead listen and are prepared to wait silently for a well-formulated and insightful thought. this is something that i would really like to adopt into my life. i hope to continue to be surrounded by people with different perspectives to me and to continue to learn from them. it would be a shame to be in an area with such a wealth of diversity and never experience it. although many of the differences of opinions i have had here have resulted in great resolutions. outside notre dame, i have witnessed our society, including my high school dive deeper into political mania. politics aside, every disagreement nowadays, it seems, must be resolved by brutalizing an opponent, rather than reaching a conclusion with another. i often find myself giving others’ ideas too little leeway in my mind, or thinking it might be necessary to convince people that they are wrong for no apparent reason, other than to prove myself right. this would only contribute to the problem i described. father jenkins described our current situation by stating, “the danger is all around us now. hatred is rising, yet all sides feel more virtuous. we’re asleep to the threat (fr. john jenkins, wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, moreau fye week 10).” i experience this danger whenever i switch on the news, spend enough time off campus, or in one or two disagreements i have had with other students. the question i have asked myself more over the past year or two is how can we put an end to this completely insane polarization. i gave my opinion in the week 11 qqc that politics has replaced religion for many, and that people hold on to their politics with a fervor that can only be described as religious in nature. i am not saying that religion should be everbodys’ solution to this problem, but for me having a more benign priority has turned me from somebody who was participating in this political mania to someone who seeks other, more fruitful things. some of those things include, spiritual, academic, and physical betterment; all things that i have committed myself to at notre dame. despite the massive amount of adversity and failure i have experienced since the start of this journey at notre dame, i am still confident that religion will play a key piece in faith and discipline. in c.s. lewis’ the screwtape letters, we get an incredible depiction of how the enemy operates and seeks to ruin our lives. however, the demons exclaimed that their cause is never more in danger than when someone “asks (god) why he has been forsaken, and still obeys (c.s. lewis, the screwtape letters moreau fye week 12).” this hypothetical person is in a hopeless situation, but still keeps his/her faith and obedience to god and his teachings. similarly, i hope to keep my bearings straight and achieve my goals through my faith and discipline. i have experienced difficulties and failure since arriving. i am seeing a world and a people which seem keen on destroying themselves, but i have also achieved victories, hit goals, and seen opportunities ahead. i have learned from others, who have totally different views on how to do so. my experience at notre dame has been difficult at times, but overall spectacular and exhilarating. i know the difficulty will not go away, but i hope to keep the spectacles and exhilaration, not through relaxing my goals, but through discipline in hitting them and faith that there is a plan for me. microsoft word moreau integration .docx laura díaz moreau integration friday, october 15, 2021 why am i who i am? root beliefs are statements of conviction that shape choices and priorities. each person has different root beliefs, and after being a notre student for two months now, i have learned and reflected about what are my personal root beliefs. each root belief forms me into the person i am on my daily basis, and each of them make me be a better person, approaching situations life throws at me in the best way possible. the following root beliefs are part of who i am and are what shape me and make me the way i am today. i believe that i am searching for courage, vulnerability and belonging. as brené brown states, “these folks had the courage to be imperfect.”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this thought really leads me to believe how people who embrace their imperfections, have the most courage and live the happiest. as she explains, the biggest barrier for belonging is fitting in because when you are trying to fit in, you forget about who you really are. this is something i always keep in mind because to really belong to a community, one must stand tall with her/his true self, otherwise that feeling of belonging will never be accomplished. here at notre dame, we have a diverse community and as soon as i got here, i noticed that it only takes being myself to feel that i fit in a certain group. i have learned that being vulnerable is not something i should be ashamed of, on the contrary, it is something that has helped me build stronger relationships. i believe that i can grow as my most authentic self by sticking to my values and as said above, standing tall with my true self. as david brooks explains his vision of how society is divided in adam i and adam ii, he states: “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). this quote demonstrates the distinct aspects of human nature. humans tend to value more material success than emotional success and for most people, it is easier to judge someone by his/her accomplishments, instead of judging by how he/she accomplished it. therefore, i believe that in order to be an authentic, successful person, it is important to be a combination of both adams, meaning that when being an innovative, creative person, the person is also humble and spiritual. this week i learned which are the strengths that define me and how i can practice them for my benefit in a daily basis. in order to be successful, i should not only think about the outcome, but i should also have in mind what is the best and truthful way to get there. since hope is one of my signature strengths, here at notre dame i have faced situations where i have found myself in need of sticking to the thought that everything happens for a reason, and that everything is possible if we have a good mindset. this feeling of hope is what has kept me motivated in difficult situations. i believe that faith plays a big role in how i see the world because as professor david fagerberg states in his article, “hope anchors the soul.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” – by proffesor david fagerberg – moreau fye week three). having a sense of hope and specially faith in our lives will always give us a feeling of comfort and motivation that even though we may don’t see it at the moment, we are on the right path. being hopeful is what will lead us towards our faith and closer to god, and the best way to face difficult situations is to always be hopeful that everything happens for a reason, and that god has put you in that particular situation for a reason, like fr. pete mentions in his video (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick – moreau fye week three). at the start of the semester, adapting to this new life here at notre dame felt very overwhelming, due to all the changes i was experiencing, and i started asking myself “why am i here?”. weeks after, i have noticed the important role faith plays in my life and instead of pushing my faith away in difficult situations, i believe that good things are coming for me, because as said, having hope will lead me to light, not darkness. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by always keeping in mind how each relationship in my life makes me feel about myself and if they help me be a better or worse version of myself. as olivia t. taylor says, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something longterm.” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). most people, if not all, live with at least one unhealthy relationship, and the problem is finding it out and knowing how to stop it. people tend to settle with these unhealthy relationships without realizing they can find better relationships that make them feel better about themselves. a healthy relationship is filled with honesty, respect, comfort, equality, among other qualities, and these are the essential elements that will make you feel you are investing in a long-term relationship. i am aware that toxic relationships are more common than what people think, and everyone should be able to recognize them. from past experiences, i can say that having unhealthy relationships throughout my life and being able to recognize them, has helped me build better connections and relationships with new people nowadays, for example with people here at notre dame. i believe that stories shape my journey because as fr. kevin grove says, “we believe there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing.” ( "two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove – moreau fye week five). people tend to see every failure and every negative outcome in their lives as a problem or as an obstacle, instead of gaining strength and lessons from them and embracing their journey of life. i tend to fight myself because my first instinct when something does not go the way i expected, is to close my mind and get disappointed, but then i remember i must learn from my mistakes and that these “failures” will then become my strengths. here in notre dame, this concept is very present because here we not only educate ourselves and learn academic stuff, but we also learn to become better persons. this week i learned about moreau’s thought that a great education couldn't only be about learning things, it had to be about educating the human body as a whole. this is why what i most like about notre dame is that it makes students feel we all have a purpose, and it teaches us to believe in ourselves and learn from our experiences. i believe that where i come from has shaped me into who i am today. i feel the phrase “where i’m from” is a very interesting one because for every person it means something completely different, and it is a phrase that contains millions of stories behind it ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six). as i wrote about where i come from, i was able to reflect on how each of my stories and experiences have formed me. i feel proud to say that i come from a very united, strong family, who are the ones who support me and have raised me into who i am today. we live in a small, but amazing country which holds most of the best experiences of my life, those who have shaped me into who i am today. every person comes from different backgrounds, and these backgrounds are what make each person unique, and this is something that called my attention while discussing our poems in class. as a notre dame student, i am sure these beliefs and background are going to help me make my journey a better one, by always having present from where i come from. i believe that i pursue the truth by always having an open mind about everything and not limiting myself to believe incomplete stories. as chimamanda ngozi adichie says, “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story.” ( "danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). it is very easy to believe what we don’t really know, and this is why stereotypes are so common in our society. for this reason, we should always be informed and not believe in everything we are told. like adichie says, stereotypes are not always the complete story, and they tend to generalize aspects of people that are not true, making people believe certain traits about other people just because they are part of a group, making them biased. for me, it is very important to always keep this thought in mind, specially here in notre dame, where i am constantly meeting new people that come from different places. it is important to always keep my mind open and to not judge people before knowing them, in other words, not believing in stereotypes before knowing the complete story. for these past weeks, i have been able to deepen my self-knowledge, and figure out ways that will help me grow as a person. notre dame is the perfect place for this because its community and ways of teaching make every student be the best version of themselves. this place has made me learn and emphasize my root beliefs and put them into practice on my daily life. i am sure that i will continue to grow and learn more about myself throughout my journey in notre dame, where i will continue to learn how to be a better person, live my life by staying true to myself and living a life based in hope, faith, and values, which will guide me to live a life being the best version of myself. citations “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two “faith brings light to a dark world” – by proffesor david fagerberg – moreau fye week three “the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick – moreau fye week three “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four "two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove – moreau fye week five "where i'm from" by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six "danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven building a better future for myself so far at college, i have encountered a substantial amount of struggle, and i have had to think of ways to overcome it. coming to a new place brings many new challenges, and it is not always easy to make adjustments on the fly, especially when under a high level of academic pressure. i had to come up with new methods of time management, coping with stress, and using resources in order to rise above the issues i was dealing with. this has allowed me to perform better in school, enjoy life more, and have an overall more positive experience. when i first came to college, i put a lot of pressure on myself to be successful. however, certain adjustments had to be made from high school that i did not necessarily expect. at first, it was demoralizing. i had become accustomed to a high level of success with a medium level of effort, and it was a culture shock to realize that things are more difficult now. it became easy to get down on myself and feel as if i had failed. but i realized that as i encountered these struggles, i was responding in the wrong way. rather than setting certain expectations and considering any other result to be a failure, perhaps it was better to change my expectations: “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“ why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit ” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). making this change was a great decision. not only did i feel more gratified by the things i achieved, but i was able to come closer to my original expectations by relaxing and having confidence in my work and what i accomplished. it made me realize that, while goals are healthy, what we learn on the path to achieving them is even more important than where we end up. by adjusting my expectations, and allowing myself to do my best and cope with struggle, i improved my mental health significantly, and i improved my skills as a student/person as well. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ one of the most rewarding parts of college has been the encounters i have had with a variety of people. when you grow up in a relatively small town, your interactions are largely limited to people who have had very similar experiences to yours. as such, it can be difficult to learn about the struggles that other people face in their lives, especially when they have different backgrounds than you. however, meeting so many new people from around the world has allowed me to expand my horizons significantly. in particular, sensitive issues such as racism and xenophobia are far easier to learn about here. when so many people have had a first hand experience with these struggles, they are an extremely good resource if they are willing to share. it has helped me to understand my own identity better, and to be more sensitive to the issues of others. furthermore, it has allowed me to better understand my responsibility to help solve these problems. as written by christopher j. devron s.j.: “white people don’t get a moral pass by simply refraining from overtly racist acts. rather, they must examine racial biases within systems; reflect on how they participate in and benefit from these biases; and then take deliberate action to change them” (“ should catholic schools teach critical race theory ?” by christopher j. devron s.j. moreau fye week 10). in my encounters with various students here, i have become a better person by embracing what they have to offer and learning from them. bonds like these allow us to forge relationships even when we may have different backgrounds, and move forward together as a society. i have found that my encounters with those who are different from me have been some of the most rewarding experiences in my life to date, and i hope they continue in the future. one of the greatest parts about notre dame is the intense sense of community which can be felt all around campus. i have been a part of various communities throughout my life, in academics, athletics, or my social life. however, what is unique about notre dame is that it puts https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 8,000 undergraduate students in the same situation, and has an excellent faculty whose main goal is helping you succeed. a truly strong community is one in which all the individual parts are working towards collective success, and to provide for each person as needed. it goes without saying that this exists at notre dame. resources are readily available for whatever students may need, and it is never hard to find a peer or higher-up who is willing to accommodate your needs. it can be said that “ leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space in which human resourcefulness may be evoked” (“ thirteen ways of looking at community ” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). notre dame certainly fits these criteria. transitioning to college can be extremely challenging for many, so it is important to have a strong sense of community supporting them when they are in times of struggle. here, you can find assistance for your academics, social life, faith, mental health, or just about any area you can imagine. the notre dame community certainly embodies resourcefulness, and it fosters an environment where students can learn and grow. notre dame has helped me to grow both academically and spiritually in my time here. oftentimes at competitive universities students become so focused on their studies that they commit themselves to education at the expense of their mental health and spirituality. however, notre dame has the opposite approach. the school understands that the most important thing here is the health and happiness of the students. furthermore, it is understood that by prioritizing this, it will create a healthier learning environment for students and allow them to have better results in their education. in a holy cross booklet, it is written that “we shall always place education side by side with instruction; the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart. while we prepare useful citizens for society, we shall likewise do our utmost to prepare citizens for heaven” (“ holy cross and christian education ” by notre dame campus ministry http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051/download?download_frd=1 moreau fye week 12). though this sounds intuitive, it is very easy to forget about what really matters in our daily lives. i often found myself overwhelmed with work in recent months, and it made me realize that, though hard work is important, it was possible that i was focusing too much on my work and not enough on myself. by reminding myself that there are more important things than academic success, i was able to return to a better place spiritually, and to lead a healthier life overall. responding to conflict is a big part of what defines you as a person. being resilient is a phenomenal quality to have, but it is easier said than done. when you encounter obstacles in your life, the natural response is anger or giving up. however, responding in a positive manner is one of the best ways to bring happiness into your life and to be more successful. whether it means adjusting your expectations, using available resources, or any other techniques, it is important to have a toolbox of ways to overcome obstacles that you meet. on the road to happiness and success, it is important to take a step back and understand your goals, and to remain positive in your life. capstone integration: what is a life well-lived? this question lies at the center of any mission statement, for our vision for a life well-lived, our values, and how we live in line with these values are deeply intertwined with the missions we set for ourselves. i first want to note that i strongly oppose the idea that there is a single ‘life well-lived’. based on my experience with our class discussions and the material from the semester, my definition of a life well-lived is based on living in accordance with core values that you establish to be important to you. what you value may change, and therefore your vision of a fulfilling and well-lived life may change as well. but that doesn’t mean that your original vision was somehow an incorrect vision of a life-well lived, it simply means that what you consider to be a life well lived changed. it should be noted that different visions of a life-well lived may have different impacts in our communities. for example, a life based on serving others in the community is markedly different in its effect than one whose idea of a life well lived is constantly exploiting others for personal gain. the only point i’m trying to make is that lives well-lived can look different from each other and for the most part we should not get locked into one path we are told is the best. a carefree surfer that values freedom, carefree living, and deeper connection to the earth through the elegant dance with the powerful waves is an equally valid vision to someone who values going to college and pursuing a professional career. with that being said, we now turn to my personal mission statement, which starts with a question: what are my values? over the course of the semester, we have looked extensively at what we value in our lives—and how they may have changed over time—through introspection, listening to other’s perspectives of our behavior, and peer discussion of our own experiences. when thinking about what i value, i naturally began by thinking about what relationships and experiences in life bring me the most joy and fulfillment. this thought process pointed me to one thing: shared experiences with friends and family. my happiest moments are good times shared with the people i care about most, so naturally these relationships constitute one of my core values. though my family often goes on emotional rollercoaster rides, fighting and screaming and yelling almost every day with our wild tempers, we have an incredibly tight relationship in our own weird way. i have two younger sisters, and between the three of us and my parents, some argument or disagreement is always going on, often to the amusement of everyone not involved. but at the end of it all, we all come together and grow. we are always there for each other and treat each other with mutual respect and when we do things together it is fun or memorable in some way. i am also incredibly lucky to have grandparents close by that support us and share in holidays and dinners and fun times together with us. when i was in eighth grade, we moved into their house for over a year when rebuilding our house. i may take it for granted in my everyday life but having a family that is always there for me had been incredibly important to me. continuing to strengthen these relationships while i can is undoubtedly a core value of mine. the same goes for my close friends. even though i may be quiet and keep to myself at times, i greatly value having close friends there for me. to me, friendship is incredibly important because it gives you someone to share in both joy and sadness of life with, bringing you closer together and enriching all of life’s experiences. for example, i loved high school water polo. i loved the competition, the physical and mental challenges, and working hard to improve. but most of all, i loved playing alongside my teammates. going through wins and losses and tough practices build a unique bond between us and made playing with them unforgettable. first core value: strong relationships with family and friends and finding joy in the experiences shared with them. my next core value is simple: honesty and perspective. i tend to have a realistic view of my situation and try to not be affected too drastically by emotional high and lows by keeping my successes and failures in perspective. in my interview with my dad about what he thinks i value, he pointed to honesty. to him, i value not only being transparent with others in my relationships, but also strongly value when others are honest with me. evidently, the behavior i display to others matches my own internal values. there is not much more to this value then my value on being honest with others, wanting honesty from others, and most importantly, being honest with myself. i also want to note that i want to be honest, but not necessarily in the way of always saying the truth to and being overly exact. you need to be able to sense what to say and what not to and what to share and not to share; there is a necessary level of ambiguity and emotional intelligence to know what to say to preserve relationships, which is at the heart of my core values. in saying i value honesty i more so mean that i want people to be real and vulnerable and allow me to be real and vulnerable. at the heart of my value on honesty is being real and being in touch with reality through good perspective, primarily through the knowledge there are things more significant than my every-day failures in this universe. second core value: being genuine and honest, and keeping perspective. finally, my final core value is confidence in myself and staying true to who i am. that is not to say that i will never change, but it does mean that i will never change who i am because of what other people think or to be accepted by certain people. this value ahs only become more ingrained in college. coming to college, nobody knows who you really are or what you are like. you can present yourself how you choose. however, i did not make any effort to change my outward persona from what it’s always been, and i am extremely proud of that. my self-confidence has only climbed, and i will preserve this sense of strong identity throughout my life. third core value: true to myself with my core values established, i can now define my mission statement. my mission is to live a life in which i live through these values to be true to myself, be honest and kind to others, and build relationships with which to share all the ups and downs of my life with. no matter where path takes me, if i can look back and say i made a wholehearted effort to live through these values, i will have lived a life well-lived. ithat is the only success i need. my life could go in countless different directions, but i do not foresee these values changing. that is not to say values do not change, but i have chosen my values as solid, unchanging anchors that keep me grounded in my mission wherever life takes me. integration 2 professor nguyen moreau 28 november, 2021 my development at notre dame and personal growth in the future i think that having to think about being myself was once something that was foreign and ambiguous to me, but once i got to college i realized that i had to focus on being myself and not fall into the norms of college life. the first few weeks were especially hard, as i found myself falling into what everyone else was doing. i was trying too hard to fit in and was being someone who i wasn’t, so even though i was making friends, i felt especially lonely because i felt out of place. in moreau week 9, the “advice from a lonely college student” article really resounded with me, as it made me realize that i should just focus on being myself and doing the things that i liked to do and i would find people that like me for who i am. in the article, emery bergmann says, “understand that your loneliness is not failure, and that you are far from being alone in this feeling. open your mind and take experiences as they come. you’re going to find your people” ("advice from a formerly lonely college student" by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). through this article, i realized that i had to try new things and could not expect to find my best friends right away. everyone is telling you that you’re going to make all of your best friends the first week of college or find your future wife in the first week, but in reality, that isn’t true for everyone and they won’t find their best friends in the first week or even the first month of college. i also realized that you have to just be yourself and put yourself out there, doing things that you enjoy and you will find your people. after the first few weeks, i felt kind of out of place in some of my classes and also sometimes in my dorm, but as i settled in and kept being myself i https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html formed some good relationships and realized that i had some great friends right in front of me. from now on, i will continue to be myself and not get caught up in what everyone else is doing so that i can focus on myself and finding my people. i discovered that race and hate are not as black and white as they appeared to me at first, and are much more nuanced and complicated than i initially thought. growing up in a predominantly white, catholic, middle-class community in my grade school and high school, i didn’t really have to think about problems of race and inequality much. i did encounter hate but did not think about it deeply enough to realize how much of a problem it is and how hurtful it can be to people. in week 10, we read father jenkins’ commencement address in which he talks about the importance of love in times of hate and division like we have in our country right now. more specifically he states, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c. moreau fye week 10). this quote resounded with me, as i feel like in today’s country and even in some groups around campus, a lot of people treat each other poorly and some use other people for their own gain or happiness. this is a huge problem; a sort of pandemic that is overtaking our country. through father jenkins’ address, i realized that hate and scorn are very prevalent and deeply woven into our society. i saw this especially on campus, where students use each other for their own gains, whether that be for sex, homework, or for happiness in general. in the future, instead of pointing out others’ weaknesses and bad attributes, i will accept them and build them up, just like they were doing in the kintsugi workshop. i will approach everyone with love like father jenkins says, and try to diminish the hatred that is overtaking the world. https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ race is related to my deepened understanding of hate and scorn because i have seen in my time in college that race affects most people, even those that i would not have thought would be affected. in week 11, we explored the importance of connecting with others to form community, even when there are differences or conflicts. this was especially seen in professor fuentes’ talk about race when he says, “race and inequality matterbut they are not fixed” ("diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). although this is a short quote, i think that it is extremely illuminating of these two issues and is important to think about. this quote shows that we can change our perceptions about race and inequality, as they are social constructs and don’t hold any meaning unless people give it meaning. before coming to college, i did not think much about race and how it affects community as well as how it affects those who are of different races. however, once watching this talk and listening to others discuss it in class, i realized that race is a huge issue and can prevent community from forming. some of my classmates said that they felt out of place because of their race, as notre dame is predominantly white and therefore has a lot of white culture and customs. it is hard for those who are not white to fit in without losing their own culture and customs. because of this, from now on i will be inclusive of all people and customs and will try to make notre dame a more inclusive and welcoming place for those of other races and cultures in order to form a stronger community. going back to the quote above, i will also change my perceptions and preconceived notions about race in order to be more inclusive and open to other people. the loneliest times and the times where i am feeling the most down have increased in importance in my time at the university of notre dame. in the past, when i was really lonely or down, i always had my twin brother or my parents to raise my spirits and get me feeling better. now, it is much different, as all i have are my friends to get me feeling better and sometimes i do https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 not even have my friends, so i have to resolve my loneliness myself. in week 12, we read the screwtape letters, in which screwtape says, “[god] relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks” ("a brief introduction to the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i think that the screwtape letters draws attention to the fact that the troughs are the biggest growing points and opportunities for us. it is in the failures that we are able to learn how to better ourselves. furthermore, it is in these troughs that we can make that choice whether to choose god or choose evil. we can either make the more difficult decision to turn to god in our strife and struggles, or we can allow the devil to enter us and turn away from god and blame him for our issues. in my time at notre dame, i have tried to get closer to god and grow in my faith life, and it is in these troughs that i have found i experience the most growth. it is in the times of deepest loneliness and depression that i have found god and grown in strength through him in my journey out of these deep holes of sadness. in the future, i will continue to look at these bad times as growing points for myself and my relationship with god. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192658?wrap=1 10/8/2021 a coming of age: from boy to man i believe that am searching for a group of close friends who i can use to broaden my perspectives and form my identity. after my first two days on campus, i felt miserable. i wasn’t making any friends like everyone else and i was so nervous that my stutter prohibited me from engaging in even the most basic forms of communication. i felt worthless and unworthy, and i spent that night crying in my bed. it took a few weeks, perhaps a month, to start to form relationships with others. to make that change, i had to hold myself in a high esteem. as brené brown asserts in her tedx talk, “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (7:24). i had to believe in my capabilities, that i was worthy. i believe that i must discover my identity and aspire to be my ideal self, not the embodiment of others. in coming to college, i sought to use my independence as a fresh start to mold myself into the being which i strive to be. i realized that in order to succeed in this goal, i must embrace my complete self as i am, and not conceal parts of my identity from the world. as david brooks asserts in his ted talk, “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths, and adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses.” adam 2 is the virtuous and moral being, while adam 1 is not. i must embrace my flaws such as my speech impediment and fight this weakness instead of shoving it in the closet and trying to suppress it. i believe that the simple acts of kindness and compassion can go the longest way in making the world a better place. since coming to campus, i have learned that i am not the only one struggling in my transition to independence. i have come to find that enduring this change with others is better than enduring alone. in order to expect help from others, i should offer kindness and compassion to those who need it, such as helping a struggling friend on a math assignment, waiting for my friend to finish his meal, or even just holding the door open for someone. “treat others how you want to be treated,” my mother always told me. in his article about faith, david fagerberg claims that “the unexpected flashes of love in our lives illuminate reality, like a thunderbolt of lightning can illuminate the dark yard.” people in rough patch are the ones who need our kindness the most, and it is important that we recognize their needs. since coming here, i have learned that college is not easy, and study groups and friends to rely on are essential for success. i believe that having a good friend to share your inner thoughts and feelings with is essential to my well-being. over the past few weeks, i have developed an intimate relationship with my roommate to the point where no conversation crosses the line. having that connection is essential for me because it prevents me from keeping my fears pent-up inside of me, which would cause me to be stressed and depressed more often. as olivia taylor describes in her article about relationships, “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting.” several times so far since coming to south bend, i have had to walk away from a relationship because i knew that i couldn’t be my genuine self in front of that person, since i was always trying to prove my “popularity” in front of them. it was important for me to recognize that dynamic because things could have easily turned south if i didn’t act. i believe that my education is meaningless without understanding its purpose my whole life, i have been told the goal is to get into a good college to get a good job to make a lot of money. but is that really why i am being educated? i think not. my goal is to make the world a better place so that my children can live even better lives that i live. i am being educated so that i can help those who were not as fortunate as i am, so that they may have the same opportunities that i do. as father kevin grove explains in his speech to the notre dame community, “faith and reason together place us in relationship to each other.” we cannot have a functioning society with functioning relationships if we are unable to understand why we learn and why we invest in the pursuit of knowledge. in my middle eastern studies usem class for example, we don’t just memorize facts about the past, we try to make sense of patterns and motives of groups and empires so that we can better understand political dynamics in our current world today. perspectives such as these enable us to solve current issues in our society. i believe that learning from my past experiences and sharing them with others is the key to forming successful relationships and developing my character. everybody knows we are a product of our experiences. it defines who we are, what friends we have, what we prefer, and how we act. being transparent and open about your past lets others know that you entrust your personal knowledge to them, which strengthens both of your relationships. in her poem “where i’m from,” george ella lyon shares childhood experiences and memories to describe who she is. experiences provide lessons. typically, we cling to experiences with negative outcomes, so they remind us not to act in the same way in the future. i am an introvert. i want to be an extrovert. but that claim would not make sense if you did not understand my experiences. i was rarely allowed to go over to friend’s houses. i developed a very unhealth video game addiction at one point in my life. it took many years for me to stop looking out the window at who i could be and start looking into the mirror at who i was. now i am better able to self-reflect. and thus, i am happier, and more satisfied with who i am. i believe that understanding who people are and what they believe in is important to removing any implicit biases that we may have. as i have learned in my free speech class here at notre dame, hate speech arises when one ethnic or cultural group are fed stereotypes from disinformation platforms that are based on broad generalizations. this breeds discrimination and even incitement of violence because we tend to distance ourselves from those who are different from us. as opinion writer david brooks asserts in his article “how to destroy truth,” “emotional and moral knowledge should give us a sense of identity, a sense of ideals to live up to and an appreciation of the values that matter most to us.” a lack of knowledge destroys truth. thus, it is my duty to preserve truth by educating myself about others. this is made possible not just by learning in a classroom, but by interacting with those who are different from me culturally and socially so that i can learn from their experiences and avoid implicit biases that i may form. since coming to notre dame, i have had the opportunity to meet so many interesting people from places ranging from my hometown to the philippines to brazil. each person i meet has a story, one that defines them and makes them special. works cited: “the power of vulnerability” by brene brown fye week one “should you live for your resume…or your eulogy?” by david brooks, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim – moreau fye week two “faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg, https://grottonetwork.com/keep-thefaith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world moreau fye week three “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor, https://grottonetwork.com/navigatelife/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ moreau fye week four “two notre dames: your holy-cross education” by father kevin grove, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4a1c1-d0a45c429187 moreau fye week five “where i’m from” by george ella lyon, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html -moureau fye week six “how to destroy truth” by david brooks, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotismmisinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare – moreau fye week seven https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare week 8 moreau integration learning to write my own story throughout my time in this course, it has been my goal to focus on developing not just a unique identity, but one that truly reflects the person that i want to be. it has been somewhat difficult to maintain autonomy in a college setting, where everyone is very concerned about how they are perceived by others. it can be very easy to allow your identity to become corrupted and to change your persona to fit better with others around you. however, it is far more fulfilling to remain patient, be yourself, and surround yourself with similar people who value your company for the right reasons. focusing on what i believe has been helpful because it reminds me who i am, and makes sure i stay on course with being the right kind of person. it keeps me anchored to my true self, and gives me more emotional stability in a very tumultuous setting. as time goes on, i will continue to make sure that the story i write at college is my own, and that i do not make sacrifices to seem more appealing to those who may not value me for the right reasons. i believe that every person should embrace their uniqueness in a college setting, it is easy to fall into the trap of pretending to be somebody you are not. when we are put into a new setting, we feel the need to fit in. as such, many people are willing to sacrifice core parts of their identity to create a persona that they feel is more appealing to the people around them. though this may grant some short term satisfaction, it is unhealthy. the friendships you may form by pretending to be someone else are not built to lastat some point, you will want to be yourself again, and this may or may not align with the person you’ve been pretending to be. as chimamanda ngozi adichie said in her famous tedtalk, “when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise” (“danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?language=en fye week 7). it is far easier to find fulfillment if you understand that you are unique, and that what makes you different is where your value lies. in a letter back to france, father sorin wrote “but as each one understands his mission, all are happy and contented. see what grace can do!” (fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreaumoreau fye week 5). when we understand that our differences make us special, and begin to chart our own course, we can truly flourish as individuals. i believe that our community should embrace diversity one of the most enriching experiences at college so far has been conversing with students from different backgrounds, especially foreign students who have had very different experiences in their lives. i learned about how the challenges faced in my life differed from theirs, and how my understanding of the world could be enhanced through the stories they told. this strongly relates to the “where i’m from” poems from week 6. in my own poem, i wrote: “i am from trials and tribulations, from the emotional journey that we all take from the days of our youth until we become adults, and from the puzzles that we solve along the way” (“where i’m from” poem by moreau fye week 6). the experience of being in a diverse community allows us to understand the things that unite us and the things which distinguish us along our journeys. conversing with those from different backgrounds allows us to learn about the trials and tribulations that others have, and in turn helps us to learn about the world and better solve the problems we face in our own lives. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nbkzv00uvuxfj3ysi-oi5qrk7me4j1f2rf60c78wfcq/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nbkzv00uvuxfj3ysi-oi5qrk7me4j1f2rf60c78wfcq/edit i believe that i need to be more vulnerable i don’t always find it to be particularly easy to open up to people. as human beings, it is natural to feel somewhat insecure about our flaws, our abilities, or other core parts of our identity. this fear makes it extremely difficult to open up to other people at times. when we are vulnerable, we feel that other people can see our flaws, which can make us uncomfortable: “what underpinned this shame… was this excruciating vulnerability” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). it is important to understand that this discomfort allows us to grow as people. being vulnerable with others helps us collectively understand each others flaws, and helps to start a process of growth. we can only begin to have meaningful conversations and learning experiences once we truly open up to people, and to do so, we need to overcome our fear of vulnerability. i believe in maintaining a positive outlook at times, we all face difficulties in our lives. sometimes it can be enough to discourage us or force us to have a pessimistic view of the world. however, it is in these times that we need to maintain our hope, and continue to have an optimistic mindset. david fagerberg writes: “hope anchors the soul. hope directs our desire toward its true end, which is the kingdom of heaven” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). hope is one of the most valuable things we can have in our lives, but it is also one of the easiest to quickly lose. but if we learn to maintain our hope and faith even in times of crisis, we can be strong even through strife. as marcus aurelius once wrote in his meditations, “stand firm like a promontory, upon which the waves are always breaking” (“the meditations of the emperor https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ http://files.libertyfund.org/files/2133/aurelius_1464_lfebk.pdf marcus aurelius”). a mindset of hope, strength, and faith allows us to remain strong through times of struggle. i believe in acknowledging my weaknesses this is something that myself, and most people, struggle with. it is not a natural human tendency to want to discuss one’s weaknesses. it makes us feel vulnerable and fragile, which is naturally uncomfortable. however, in his tedtalk, david brooks discusses the difference between adam 1, who is your external self, and your internal adam 2. brooks says: “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths. adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week 2). it is important to understand the balance between embracing your strengths, but also adjusting your internal weaknesses to become a stronger person overall. generally, we like to shy away from our weaknesses and ignore them. however, if we don’t acknowledge our weaknesses, they only grow worse. it is better to take a deep look at our internal selves, understand our flaws, and strive to improve them in a manner free from shame. i believe in keeping a close circle i am somewhat of a picky person when it comes to friendships. though this is a somewhat flawed mindset, i enjoy it because it allows me to avoid entering relationships that are not positive. olivia taylor writes “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences. a healthy, balanced, mutual friendship involves peers who ask questions and bounce ideas back and forth” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week 4). i firmly agree with this concept, and i try http://files.libertyfund.org/files/2133/aurelius_1464_lfebk.pdf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ to make sure that all of my friendships happen for the right reasons. it is easy to enter relationships which may seem positive, but ultimately become toxic. however, if you are careful with who you spend time with, and only surround yourself with people who value your presence as much as you value theirs, then you will have a much more positive life experience. the moreau first year experience has helped me to keep close to my true self during a time of extreme change. in a new setting, it is easy to lose track of what your goals should be, and your journey can be thrown off course quite quickly. however, when this begins to happen, the best thing to do is revisit your core beliefs and make sure you have a deep understanding of the person you want to be. a return to your core ideals is the best way to maintain your autonomy, especially in a situation where it is easy to get roped into a group and lose your individuality. it is important that learn from others, but also that we make sure we are writing our own story. i know that over the next few years i will make sure that i stay on the right course, and write the story that fits me best. microsoft word document3 encountering obstacles furthers growth this semester i have encountered new people, new ideas, and new ways of thinking. i was exposed to a much more diverse atmosphere than i was used to back home in pensacola, florida. all the new aspects of college life also caused me to encounter struggles, obstacles, and even loneliness at some points. however, with these new challenges that i was faced with i learned from mistakes that i had made, and i also became a better person after overcoming each obstacle and struggle. 1: encountering change. “i had been looking forward to college for years…. this was not the payoff i expected” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week 9). this quote perfectly sums up my initial emotions and thoughts when i first arrived at notre dame. i have always been told that college is the best four years of life, so i had high hopes and expectations. i was looking forward to being able to go anywhere i wanted without having to tell my parents, go to parties every weekend, and, most importantly, make best friends for life. however, a little over one week in and i already hated business school and transferred to ftt. even in ftt i still was not very happy, so i dropped out to pursue youtube and signed the papers making it official. my mom called the provost office to get them to accept me back in if i changed my mind, and my brother convinced me to stay in college. all those events occurred in the first few weeks of the semester starting. now it is the end of the semester and, to be honest, i still feel the same way. my plan is to finish this year at notre dame and then transfer to south alabama, record for youtube with my florida friends, and get an apartment with two of my best friends from back home, one of which is also transferring from his current school to south alabama. however, after talking to all my old friends i realized that most of them are not happy where they are. i have been told that almost nobody enjoys their first year of college, that it takes to time to make new friends, and that change is important to expand thinking. i do believe all of that is true, but i also believe that if i am not truly happy, i should do something about it to make me happy. so, while my response of transferring to be with old friends may seem as if i am running away, i really am doing it to further my youtube channel, something that i am passionate about, and increase my enjoyment of life. 2: encountering diversity. “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 10). at notre dame i have encountered diversity like i have never seen before. on a regular basis i will hear students speaking in chinese and spanish, and every single class that i am in has at least one student from a foreign country. i will admit that i can be very judgmental of others based on their political views, religion, nationality, etcetera, but my mindset has truly changed this semester at college. in moreau i could not avoid conversing with just about everybody in the class since it was so small, and our seats changed every week. one student that i met is pedro, and he is also in alumni hall with me. he is from brazil, and i never thought that me and him would become friends. this is because i really do not know anything about brazil, nor have i never met somebody born in brazil. however, he is one of my go-to friends to play a game of pool with and he always swipes up with support on my instagram stories that promote my youtube videos. i learned that people from different countries really are not that much different than americans. yes, they have unique accents and different cultures, but their hobbies that they enjoy doing are mostly in line with what americans, like me, enjoy doing as well. they are just normal college-aged students who enjoy what just about all other college-aged students enjoy, despite their differing nationalities, 3: encountering loneliness. “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). in high school i was always social and had a lot of friends. in fact, i was much more friend oriented than family oriented and spent almost every single day with friends. then i went to college and had to start the friend-making process over again. however, i had this bias that most notre dame kids are nerds who only care about school and academics. i came to realize that they do care about their schoolwork, of course, but it is not their life to focus on school. my roommate jake, who helps me film, is my best friend at notre dame right now, and all my other friends here are mainly people i play pool with. as much as i hate to say it, i still really do not have any friends at notre dame. yes, i know a bunch of people who i am friendly with and who i hang out with, but i still do not have my group of friends that we do everything together with like i had in high school. while my bias about everybody being 100 percent academically focused was not true, i still have not found a single person that i truly click with. i feel as if i really do not belong here because i really do not care about school, but i just care about enjoying life and having fun. i know that everybody must do things they do not enjoy to get somewhere that they will enjoy, but it is hard to find something you enjoy when 1) i do not enjoy my environment and 2) i do not have friends to enjoy things with. i have never been depressed or so lonely to the point where i literally have nobody, but i will find myself watching netflix alone on a saturday night rather than being with friends. recently, i have been working on putting myself out in the open more, and i have already made three good friends by just reaching out: one helps me with my youtube videos and the other two play pool with me a lot. i even looked up other youtubers from notre dame and messaged one i found, which in turn caused us to get dinner together and gave me somebody new to talk to that is going after similar goals as me. 4: encountering challenges. “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven.” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week 12). these past few weeks i have really been trying to become a better person with better habits. since college i have not went as hard as usual in the gym and i also rarely went to mass or prayed. however, with everything i am going through in terms of feeling like i do not fit in and with my youtube channel i am really trying to fix how i live my life. i recently got in trouble for my youtube videos, and i was forced to remove all videos on my channel filmed on notre dame campus. i also got banned from filming on notre campus. this outcome really hurt me, because i had so many ideas to film and i had a whole plan of the new direction of my content, but then it all collapsed. jake, my main filmer, is no longer filming for me so i had to reach out to new people for help. however, despite me finding new people, filming off campus is incredibly hard, especially considering i do not have a car. the saddest part for me is that i was going to stay at notre dame all four years, or at least until i got 100k subscribers on youtube. now, i feel somewhat forced to transfer because there is no realistic way for me to film at notre dame anymore. i still am going to work hard on youtube off campus because i am a strong believer in not giving up when pressured to give up, and i will still aim to post a video every tuesday, despite my filming restrictions. at the end of the semester, i have encountered struggles and challenges, but in the end, i encountered hope. i first had to encounter change for myself to change, diversity for me to expand my mind and my perception of others, loneliness to encourage me to meet new friends, and challenges for me to become more creative and innovative in my thinking. with every obstacle i became a better person, more prepared for future obstacles. i have hope for the future in terms of making new friends, my youtube channel, and even my grades, since they are decent. overall, i will always encounter both good and bad things in my life, but with every encounter comes an opportunity to learn and grow. integration 2 robert corrato robert corrato integration 2 12/3/21 taylor kelly coming closer to take a step back why me? throughout this semester, notre dame has provided me with some of my greatest friendships i will ever make along with a surround sound of inspiration from other students and professors. what made me so special from the other students who both go to notre dame/holy cross versus people i used to be with at my old school? this is why my question will take time to understand because i am extremely confident that my older-self will in fact prove that to younger me. i don’t know exactly when it will be or how it will happen, but i have never been so confident in both the world and in myself that i will do something to show all of those whoever doubted me that i was different and i was selected to be at the greatest catholic university for a reason, and not that reason only. this sounds rather full of myself, but when you give a college freshman an assignment when they are required to write about themselves from a collection of other writings that were again all about themselves, what do you truly expect? how time is ultimately supposed to tell where we will stand at this university, but i think i am very, very, far from this situation. where will i be? for sure, i am less worried about the little things, for example, making sure my laundry isn’t left in the dryer overnight or i go to bed too late/get enough sleep. as of right now, i feel like i am in the midst of the college experience. still though, i do not feel as responsible as i should be. although confusing, the “black and white” ambiguities of the college experience are extremely prevalent. these ambiguities include organizational skills, emotional responses, and diving into uncertainty, something many students over the past two years have faced. but through this, clarity is now at the forefront, eyes open and ready to strive forward. combined, my experience through moreau first year experience and the newness of the practical completion of my first semester at the university of notre dame, has ultimately “changed me.” what did you expect me to say? of course college changed me. but, how and why it changed me is the true question. coming into a new area, like everyone and everything, you will experience some type of development. that goes for everything too; joining a new group of friends, coming to a new school, or joining a new team (cough cough brian kelly). when some place is caring enough for them to welcome you with open arms, then you are bound to succeed only with you keeping up your end of the bargain. that specific end is considered to be things that surround others with the aids to help them succeed. do you understand how it’s full circle now? one of those things that i believe hold up your end is to always “love thy neighbor as yourself” this means, quite literally, to treat those the way you want to be treated. at notre dame especially, from the first step on campus, i could feel the radiation of non-intimate love coming from many areas (especially the grotto). as said in father jenkins’ commencement address during the wesley theological seminary in 2012, “and this command to love is found not only in scripture, but in our hearts. love is the deepest human need. each human being has a deep spiritual, psychological, and emotional longing for love.” (wesley theological seminary by fr. jenkins moreau fye week ten) all these people who i encountered at notre dame and holy cross are deserving of my love, just as father jenkins stated. have there been people who i have come across here who i immediately didn’t get along with or like? yes, of course, that is basic human nature. but, still being open to allow them to grow on you or settle your differences are both signs of love. while i’ve learned about those signs of love, i have realized that the bonds are more important that you make when you’re in college. these friendships are monumental that you make during the first year. coming into this new area of unknowns with friends makes the https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ experience very, very helpful. when there are times of triumph and mental toughness, friends who i have encountered are and have been incredibly resourceful in my time here. whether it’s in the classroom, dorm, or about any of my problems hundreds of miles away back in philadelphia. yet, many people are threatened by this action of lending a helping hand, being too conservative with their feelings. in week 11, we are taught by parker j. palmer. she states how, “ironically, we often resist leaders who call upon our resourcefulness...but i am going to create a space in which you can do it for yourselves.” (thirteen ways of looking at community moreau fye week eleven) that space, which i have been successfully established, has been an integral part of how i have made and understood how my friends act and express themselves emotionally. i would never want anyone to convince themselves of their own inadequacy, pain, or suffering. i felt that i have been surrounded by multiple types of leaders in a variety of different spaces/situations, and i am eternally grateful to call those leaders my friends. not being a lonely college student, quite literally, was a blessing upon another blessing. i am sure everybody who has been to college before can attest to that. though, unfortunately, there are many lonely college students, determined to get high grades to make their future as bright as possible. during the ninth week of the semester, we watched the award winning film “advice from a lonely college student.” the most influential quotations from the main protagonist emily bergmann states, “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me. going to college is a massive change — so many students are being uprooted from the familiar comforts of their homes and thrust into a completely new place. it was beyond unrealistic for me to anticipate a seamless transition.” (advice from a formerly lonely college student moreau fye week nine) focused on the end, that “seamless transition” would be something impossible without hope. all students, big http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html and small, must come into a new situation like this one with even the littlest bit of hope that they will find their little niche during the first days, weeks, months, or semester of college. from personal experience, i came right through the gates of notre dame on north notre dame ave. with hope that i would once be here. i came into my dorm and met my roommates for the first time with hope that these guys will be some of my best buds. hope from all levels is extremely important, but we must be reminded to constantly live and grow in hope. in the ninth week, we are taught how it’s normal for your hope to change, and how it’s ok. on page 44 of the screwtape letters, c.s. lewis writes, “... this means that while their spirit can be directed to an external object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change.” (screwtape letters moreau fye week nine) one thing that i had to learn accompanied with hope has to be the ability to react positively to change. personally, i firmly believe with change always comes a new hope. with hope, comes the happiness that all people so eagerly oftentimes fight for. all of these experiences and memories that i have made in this first semester reminds me of how each encounter happens for a reason. this mindset isn’t everybody’s and i do know that, but this is my integration and nobody else’s. overall, i am proud to say that these actions that have happened for a reason has been an amazing response, an answer that i was so unsure about only four measly months ago. http://www.preachershelp.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/11/lewis-screwtape-letters.pdf miller 1 professor pruitt fys 10101 15 october 2021 connection, experience, and growth i believe that i am searching for a sense of connection. i feel the most myself when i am a part of a strong community, in which i feel comfortable, loved, and supported. i found this community at my small all-girls’ high school, where i met friends that i felt genuinely connected to and loved being around. i wasn’t too eager to leave this community behind; i was nervous and sad leaving friends and moving across the country to a much larger school, where i was now just one freshman out of 2,000. i feared the feeling of anonymity that accompanies going to college and becoming a part of a “bigger pond,” in which not everyone knows and supports you. although i knew that college would be much different from high school, i felt confident in my decision to come to notre dame (and i still do). in fact, my desire for a sense of belonging and connection is what in part brought me to notre dame, as i knew from friends and family that this school breeds an indescribable bond that continues beyond graduation. i was so excited to join this community, even though i didn’t really know what the “notre dame family” looked like in reality. after being here for half a semester, i have come to better know and more greatly appreciate the sense of community and school spirit that nd fosters, and i have worked towards creating my own connections in this big network of people. miller 2 since move-in in august, i have spent the most time worrying about making “college friends,” and from meeting so many new people, i have learned more about what friendship means. finding friends—genuine friends—is difficult but incredibly rewarding. these types of friendships, as mentioned in the “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship,” occur when “two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). i believe that i have already found some people whom i know will help me to grow and have my best interest at heart, and i always want to make sure that i am cultivating these kinds of deeper, genuine connections, while watching out for people who use or mistreat me. i think that religion provides me with another opportunity for connection both to god and other people. going from catholic grammar school to high school and now college, faith has played a prominent role in my life. i value my faith for the way that it allows me to view the world; i related to the description used in the “faith brings light to a dark world” article, which described faith as “see[ing] god’s face peeking through every creature” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor fagerberg – moreau fye week three). i’ve tried to cultivate this skill of seeing god by looking around me—seeing him in myself, other people, and the natural world—and i think that this habit connects me with him. i hope to continue to develop my faith at notre dame, and i know that the opportunities to strengthen my relationship with god here are endless, from dorm masses to campus ministry and service trips. these are activities i want to become involved in and have already started to explore; i became a eucharistic minister in my dorm, and i’m looking forward to participating in masses and meeting other people also interested in getting involved in campus ministry here. religion has been a fundamental component of the communities that i have been a part of during my life, and i intend to make https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau miller 3 faith an integral part of my college experience to more strongly connect with god and the new people that i meet. to form the connections that i search for, i need to be vulnerable. by being vulnerable, i can show my authentic self to other people and create intimate connections instead of surfacelevel friendships. i was really drawn to dr. brown’s explanation of the power of vulnerability during the first week of the moreau first year experience; she explained that when we let ourselves be vulnerable, we can be deeply seen and find the connection that gives meaning and purpose to our lives. she says that vulnerability allows us to have “the courage to be imperfect… the compassion to be kind to [ourselves] first and then to others… and connection as a result of authenticity” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). brown’s emphasis on courage, compassion, and connection as the key to embracing our vulnerability connected to david brooks’ perspective on resume and eulogy virtues (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two), which we discussed the following week. while resume virtues like grades and professional achievements can bring me temporary happiness, building eulogy virtues—kindness, courage, honesty, etc.—elicit a much deeper happiness and greater opportunity for loving relationships. although it will be difficult to avoid the pressures of stacking up our society’s sought-after resume virtues, i strive to remain focused on cultivating eulogy virtues by being authentic to myself and working to genuinely connect with other people. i believe that i grow by remaining in touch with my past while reaching out for new experiences and learning from new people. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim miller 4 growth is an ongoing process that requires looking at both the past experiences that have shaped me and the experiences currently changing me. i am sometimes too fond of looking back at the past; i like reminiscing about memories with friends and thinking about how my life was different just 1 or 2 years ago. i think that much can be learned by analyzing who we are now versus who we were in the past, as well as what people and experiences brought us to where we are now. i think my fondness for living in the past is what caused me to really enjoy writing the “where i’m from” poem, brainstorming childhood memories that laid the foundations of my personality, values, and experiences (“where i’m from” by – moreau fye week six). this assignment encouraged me to think about how my parents, grandparents, siblings, friends, and neighbors have influenced and continue to influence me. i recognize that who i am today is very much contingent on the example of these people, who have consistently taught me important lessons about the value of hard work, determination, and compassion through their own words and actions. in addition to looking back at past experiences to gain insight into myself, i have learned that each new experience provides me with a valuable lesson. coming to college has certainly provided a host of new experiences: from learning to set and hold myself to a schedule, to staying on top of schoolwork and navigating new friendships, college has introduced challenges that i have both succeeded in and struggled with over the past six weeks. although facing these challenges both inside and outside of school initially frustrates me, i believe that i have improved in looking at new experiences, especially those in which i feel that i could have handled a situation differently with a friend or managed my time better in school, as valuable learning opportunities. carla harris resounds this message—the usefulness of making mistakes—in her laetare medalist address, stating that “failure brings us a gift… experience” (“notre dame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 miller 5 commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). by actively trying to learn from each new experience instead of chastising myself for small daily mistakes, i can learn to better respond to failure, trust myself, and move forward feeling positive and confident. i hope to always remember that although my experiences make me who i am, there is so much value to be gained from learning about the experiences of other people. i have always been a natural listener—i like hearing what other people have to say much more than i like talking about myself. over these past few weeks, i have met many people, learned a ton of names, and heard a lot of stories about other people’s hometowns, high schools, and families. i love getting to know people and having these kinds of conversations; each conversation enables me to learn more about that person and their perspective on the world, and i have learned that there is never one side or one story to a person. this message is made clear by chimamanda ngozi adichie in her tedtalk, in which she describes the detriment of holding onto a single story about a particular culture or group of people (“damage of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). i want to get to know more than one side of the people i meet in my life. i know that learning who a person really is takes time but is thus incredibly fulfilling. i plan to fill my life with new experiences and friendships in order to grow in an understanding of both myself and the people that i meet. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration paper chapa1 moreau first year experience oct. 2021 a me i’d never thought to see stepping foot onto the university of notre dame automatically gave me hope for the things that i will be able to accomplish throughout my journey here. i believe that my time here at notre dame will pay off in every way at the end; however, i can say that there is never truly an end at notre dame once you become part of the community. there was an instant feeling of belonging when i arrived on campus. personally, i’ve always been a shy, nervous person who never truly opened up to people. what changed my mindset was a quote that said “in order for connections to happen, we have to let ourselves be seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe that opening yourself up to others brings you closer to people, especially when the people you open up to open themselves up to you as well. it makes an individual feel safe, comfortable, and at home. meeting new people became surprisingly easy which was amazing. something i had more trouble with was figuring out my position at notre dame other than just being a student. i needed a reason for who i am and what i am doing here. i needed to find my true self here but was not exactly sure on how to. the course of moreau first year experience has exposed me to many ideas, one being a quote from a video mentions how “in order to find yourself you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). to some people, losing yourself might not be seen as a good thing; however, i believe that losing yourself provides you with the opportunity to experience new and unknown things you never thought existed. losing myself is what exposed me to opportunities outside of my comfort zone and led me to find the things i’m truly interested in. i also believe that there is always room for many experiences in my life, so i decided to keep losing myself whenever i feel the need to explore some more. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim chapa2 being at notre dame has shown me that i am never alone in anything. no matter what i do, there will always be someone there for me wherever there is a time of struggle. most importantly, i always know that i have god by my side. in the inspiring words of fr. pete mccormick, “your journey is in the loving and sure hands of god, and third remain hopeful” (“the role of faith in our story”, fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week three). i am a person that believes in faith and hope. i know for fact that i will carry both of these things no matter where my journey leads me to. along with being hopeful, i will be helpful to anyone i meet along the way. i myself don’t want to struggle, but i understand that life has its difficult moments. as i hope to receive help from others during those difficult moments, i will thrive to do the same for others within theirs. at the end of the day, i believe that i have the support of others and god with me when i need it. as sad as it is to say, i believe that at times you’ll find yourself in a relationship that is not really healthy for you to be in. i say this because of my own experiences with individuals that have tried to bring me down in life, but luckily i was able to prevent any of that from happening. things like being part of a bad relationship can happen to anyone but what happens most is being able to escape it when necessary. so far, i’ve only made the best and strongest relationships here at notre dame, in which i hope to just keep on getting healthier and stronger. in an article i read that was provided by my moreau course, a line mentions that “attention is one of the rarest forms of love”, which is true because nowadays you can’t easily sit with someone just to share each other's thoughts and feelings. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). if a person is willing to sit and listen to what you have to say as well as talking back with you, that person is worth keeping. it’s nice being able to sit down with a person to tell the stories you have that are important to you, especially the stories that are misinterpreted by other individuals. being heard gives you the chance to properly share your story and clear up any bad misconceptions that others may have about you. as a hispanic, i’ve seen individuals wrongly interpret some information about my background, which is why it is important to share my story with others and for me to be heard. understanding each other in every aspect is important for a strong relationship and finding some sort of commonality between individuals brings us closer. in the inspiring https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ chapa3 words of fr. kevin grove, “faith and reason together place us always in relationship to each other”, which can basically mean that understanding one another plus having some faith brings growth in a relationship. (“two notre dame: your holy cross edition” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c moreau fye week five). where i come from will always be important to me, which is why i believe that sharing about where i’m from makes people know the true me. no one will know where i come from better than myself which is why i really enjoyed the quote, “remember, you are the expert on you” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). not only is sharing where i’m from important, but making sure that people understand the reality of my background rather than keeping stereotypical ideas in their heads is just as important. within a very interesting ted talk by chimamanda ngozi adichie, she says, “but it would have never occurred to me to think that just because i had read a novel in which a character was a serial killer, that he was somehow representative of all americans.” she says this in a way to show that just because a single story is told which happens to contain negative information about a certain ethnicity does not mean that the negative information applies to all the individuals of that ethnicity (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i believe that hearing multiple stories rather than just one is important to the overall information of any ethnicity rather than just hearing one. i need to make sure that my story along with others is interpreted the right way. the moreau first year experience has opened up my eyes to many resources and useful information that helps me understand who i am as a person and what i’m doing with my current placement in the world. i believe that notre dame has changed me in the best way possible and i also believe that i can inspire others to do the same. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau final paper-week 8 moreau fye mike week 8—integration one 10/15/21 the way(len) of life: from failure to victory, and everything in between life is funny. the peak of this humor--at least in my opinion--comes during one’s time in college. throughout life, and certainly throughout college, one will fail many things: exams, friendships, goals, and even god. during this time, one will also be placed in many uncomfortable scenarios. however, i firmly believe that it is what one does with that failure, rejection, or discomfort, that is most important. one can often learn the most from a healthy amount of distress; in many cases, experiencing discomfort will promote one’s future. furthermore, one’s community ought to embrace victories, failures, and discomfort to the same extent. overall, i believe that a certain balance between comfort and discomfort is the key to a happy, successful life. one major belief of mine is that i pursue the most revealing truths when i place myself in uncomfortable scenarios with other people. during several of the moreau first year experience classes, we had discussions revolving around different classifications or feelings. moreover, we were often asked to reflect on which group we associate with the most and why. just looking at the physical attributes of the seventeen individuals in the class, one could easily fit us all into two or three separate groups based on arrangements such as skin color, ethnicity, presumed background/economics, or several other categories. but, nobody truly knows what brazil was like for pedro (x2); nobody knows what chicago was like for marco; nobody knows what south bend was like for noah; and so on. the “where i’m from” (“where i’m from” by *student*moreau fye week six) poems that we shared in the class certainly helped others have a clearer look into who we are and why we are the way we are. this exercise helped me understand my fellow classmates on a deeper level…not based upon wealth, family ties, or reputation…but, rather, based upon experiences and stories. coming into the class, i am sure many of us held implicit biases toward one another. “that doesn’t make you a racist, sexist or whatever-ist. it just means your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american-moreau fye week seven). we obviously knew very little about each other. but, as we grew together as a class and began to reveal more about ourselves, which peaked during week six, we began to realize that “all of these stories make [us who we are]. but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten [our] experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed [us]. the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie-moreau fye week seven). i actually had an experience during the second day of welcome week that involved my use of implicit bias. i sat down at a random table since everyone had not yet arrived on campus. a kid wearing a ronaldo juventus jersey sat next to me. he https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story started to talk, and i noticed his thick italian accent. he told me he was from milan. in my mind i assumed that he was wealthy since he was from milan, had a classy soccer jersey on, and could afford, to some extent, to come to notre dame. however, as we talked, i was proven wrong. he told me about his family: his mom was raising his three younger brothers at home; his dad was working two jobs just to remain stable; he was going to try to walk onto the notre dame soccer team so he could get some scholarship money; he was on his way to apply for a job at the duncan student center. my assumptions about him were completely wrong. but, i learned so much about what it may mean to be a foreign student at notre dame. he basically gave me a whole “where i’m from” poem during out lunch conversation. and, in fact, this implicit bias was far from the whole story. similar to this italian friend that i met, i believe in hard work. further, i believe that an individual’s hard work and sacrifice now pays off in the future. my dad has always told me that “whalens are very rarely the smartest in the room. but, we are often the hardest working in the room.” i was always weary of this, growing jealous of my classmates who could study for thirty minutes and get and a+ on a physics test, while i would study for hours and receive a b. in the moreau first year experience class, we examined our own strengths and weaknesses. i remember writing down “persistence” as one of my strengths, and “comparison” as one of my weaknesses. i can study for hours and hours, as proven by my first eight weeks at notre dame. however, i often find myself wishing that i could “be like devin” (my school’s valedictorian, who is now at harvard). this is an odd combination when it comes to college, and even life in general. even within the first week of classes, i established myself as the early-riser, hardworking type. i am the first to get up and the last to go to bed, often because i am working or studying. my mindset, as seen in my high school senior quote, is to “reach for the stars so if you fall you land on a cloud” (“homecoming” by kanye west). this tactic became even iffier when i was introduced to college, as compared to high school, especially at a place like notre dame. in certain college classes, such as chemistry, i found myself on the low end of the grade. after the first test, i would be doing at least two hours of chemistry work per night just to stay above the “acceptable gen. chem.” grade for medical school. during that first week, i found myself wishing that i was one of those naturally intelligent people, like many individuals in this class. however, i have grown to acknowledge that “each journey is unique. as [i] try to sort things out, [i must] resist the temptation to compare yourself to others” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick-moreau fye week three). i have the belief that i am at notre dame because of the sacrifices i made during high school, whether that be sleep, food, or even sometimes experiences. i have accepted that i am not one of those whizzes that can ace any test that is put in front of them. overall, i believe that hard work combined with a healthy amount of sacrifice is incredibly worthwhile. this hard work tactic of mine certainly has its limits, however. i have had my successes during college, and i have had my failures during college. i believe that a community should share in victories and failures equally. although my name is brody, my ethos is composed of two different adams. “adam one is built by building on [my] strengths; adam two is built by fighting [my] weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume of your eulogy” by david brooks-moreau fye week two). duncan hall is a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim unique place. i have carried on several of my strengths in conjunction with my hall brothers. for example, just last week we competed in an interhall cross-country event. we celebrated at the finish line together and had an immense amount of support for each other. one of the best moments of the event was when the duncan finishers ran our president in the last half mile, cheering and singing the duncan theme song along the way. on the contrary, i have shared my defeat with my fellow duncan brothers. sticking with the chemistry struggle: when i came back from receiving a low midterm grade, i was extremely distressed. some of the guys could visibly see this. one of my friends—the president of duncan, as well—came up and asked what was wrong. i told him about my struggles in this class. funny enough, he had been through that same exact class! he gave me some advice, and a perspective of the overall class. he recalled his brawl with the class, reassuring me that i am not the only one who has ever had this experience. he “had the courage to be imperfect” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown-moreau fye week one), which i greatly appreciated. he even called a couple other duncan guys over who had been in that same class. that day, i learned that “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by olivia taylor-moreau fye week four). i did indeed leave with a smile on my face, after realizing that my college community will support me in my failures just as they do in my successes. throughout my college career thus far, i have experienced all of my main core beliefs firsthand. i have encountered many individuals that are drastically different than me; i have put in a lot of work in hopes of becoming a doctor; i have been vulnerable https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 http://www.theredflagcampaign.org/handouts with both my successes and failures within the duncan hall community. although i am sure i will edit my approaches in college in some way, these core beliefs have helped me maintain a certain equilibrium among school, clubs, athletics, family life, and more. it is due to this state of equilibrium that i am able to experience a minimally fluctuating sense of contentment. as i go through college, i aspire to both refine and confirm my core beliefs. above all, i hope that “every [belief] searches for truth, and shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” by fr. sorin-moreau fye week five). https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view integration one schmidlkofer 1 maria finan moreau first-year experience 12 october 2021 how you have blessed me i believe that i am searching for freedom. when dr. brown says, “[we] make everything that's uncertain certain," she is describing how we escape the vulnerability that is necessary to belonging (brown, week 1). she argues that everyone struggles and that we should not try to numb the discomfort of this struggle. further, she describes numbing as substance abuse but also this pursuit of certainty. for me, this recalls that the heart remains restless, and this reminds me that i often search for freedom from this struggle’s discomfort. specifically, in one view, the struggle is an endless maze, as everyone struggles throughout life. while i have taken comfort in attempting to map this maze and make it certain, i fear such attempts are only temporary comfort. searching for freedom, then, is not mapping the maze but instead embracing the uncertainty and pushing forward. mapping the maze, though an attempt to search for freedom, prevents this act of pushing forward. i push forward in my search for freedom. i believe that i grow by wrestling with my repeated mistakes. when david brooks says, “you find the sin which you've committed over and over again through your life...and you fight that sin, and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed,” he is comparing the development of strengths in a resume to the overcoming of weaknesses for a eulogy (brooks, week 2). simply put, people will not remember whether those who have passed received high or low letter grades, schmidlkofer 2 but people will remember whether the deceased were kind or loyal. i have many sins that i commit over and over again. often, i focus on my attitudes and judgments as sins, but of course, my actions are too. namely, i lack hope and get caught in the past, and have also neglected the people i care about. i like to think that i work to improve my care for my family and friends, my concern for disadvantaged people. i wrestle with negativity and detachment. with brooks’ message, these repeated mistakes are not end-all negative evaluations so much as they are parts in a life-long process of wrestling and growth. i believe that my purpose is to have faith. victor in length says, “if i were to one day lose all the clothes on my back…the food and wealth i had to spend, and…all the people i had in my life, the one thing that i could never lose…is my faith” (victor, week 3). further, as ecclesiastes laments, “...vanity of vanities! all things are vanity!” then affirms, “...fear god and keep his commandments, for this concerns all humankind” (ecclesiastes 1:3, 12:13 nabre). perhaps the problem is that i have no faith in god. in a letter i received from my dad on my senior class retreat, he repeated the phrase, “how you have blessed me!” my dad knows that i have had no faith for a while. still, halfway through the letter, my dad wrote, “faith was a gift my parents gave me, and i hope i have given some to you.” i believe that my purpose is to have faith, but i do not have it. i have my family, but what can i do for them if i do not have faith? maybe i often lack hope because i lack faith, and maybe deficiency in these areas is a hindrance to love. moreover, as my dad writes, “i suspect most of all [marriage] lets you see and be yourself in another human being and your children. that is one of the better answers to faith, is it not?” in his questioning, i reflect that he believes faith and love are necessary to each other. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships through commitment. schmidlkofer 3 discussing toxic relationships, olivia taylor asks for reflection, writing “think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend.” (taylor, week 4). i did not have many friends in high school. at home, i mostly did schoolwork and read books. my mom, however, likes jogging. it makes her feel healthy and helps relieve her stress. i do not like jogging, but i would go with her because she does not like going alone. i had also read into the wild, in which mccandless clearly states that “happiness [is] only real when shared,” even if he does so while starving to death alone in the woods (krakauer 205). thus, my mom and i jogged together and grew closer together, and i even found some joy and value in jogging. part of this growth too probably relates to dr. brown’s connection between vulnerability and belonging, as i often talk with my mother if i am having a difficult time. i believe that my community should support those in need. fr. kevin grove discusses notre dame’s history, and in doing so describes the meaning of his pendant, saying, “...‘ave crux spes unica,’ meaning ‘hail the cross, our only hope.’ anchors were an ancient symbol of hope...our work as educators shies away from no difficulty...we are especially here for you, when you fail and when things break” (grove, week 5). circular reasoning relates to my most common perspective and my struggle in the school’s community. i believe that i should sustain personal struggles because i can support others who are not only struggling more than me but further are doing so with fewer advantages than me. i believe that supporting disadvantaged people, or more broadly, meeting the needs we see, is one of the greatest forms of good. what does is mean to be a part of one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country? if i am in a community that supports people in need, and i am therefore also supporting people in need, then what do i do about personal needs? what is the connection between goodness and need? is goodness beyond meeting needs? is it not putting the schmidlkofer 4 needs of others before personal needs? how do we give our lives to others without taking on the characteristics of the dead? despite my uncertainties, supporting others is what it means to be a force for good. i believe that i pursue truth by questioning the nature of philosophy. writing about her poem, george ella lyon states, “don't rush to decide what kind of writing you're going to do or to revise or finish a piece. let your goal be the writing itself” (lyon, week 6). i think my dad would agree with lyon, as his advice is always to “start writing.” i try to avoid writing about philosophy because my dad has always had an odd relationship with the subject. this relationship was exemplified one christmas evening. playing some table games with our family relatives, my dad had a phrase like, “i do not appreciate it when people put ____ in my face.” the rest of us had to pick from the cards we had what we believed he would be most likely to fill the blank with. my cousin had “philosophy,” which my dad chose. my dad has degrees in philosophy, theology, and english, but i rarely discuss these subjects with him. i think for him the term “philosophy” refers to a group of ideas that are too imparticular and abstract to find meaningful. while i know little to nothing about plato or heidegger, i find deep satisfaction in syllogisms. nonetheless, my father gives me the impression that truth is more particular than an abstraction that examples illustrate while also existing beyond the reduction of examples. i believe that i am made to share the complexity of human dignity. chimamanda ngozi adichie describes her life, saying, “all of these stories make me who i am. but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me...the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity” (adichie, week 7). i have often identified myself only as my possible career, and my only possible career being in engineering. in high school, i approached a boy, luiz, for his schmidlkofer 5 nonjudgemental and humble demeanor. conversations about physics and technology sustained our relationship. i learned that he had to work to help support his family and to pay for his tuition. eventually, we both found interests in literature and philosophy. i also learned that he was insecure about many of the things i was, even though he did not appear to be. he gave me a story of who i was. that is, i saw parts of myself in him and i took on parts of him that i appreciated. attending school became more than the preparation to be an engineer or an academic competition. he showed me i was more than this single story, and reflecting on our relationship continues to remind me of this. schmidlkofer 6 moreau references 1. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith 2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 2. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim 3. (“student reflections of faith” by victor and campus ministry moreau fye week three) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp= sharing 4. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ 5. (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4e b4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 6. (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html 7. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story 8. new american bible revised edition [nabre]. confraternity of christian doctrine, 2010. schmidlkofer 7 9. krakauer, jon. into the wild. anchor books, 1997, epub file. moreau integration one experience different world, same me (or am i not?) i believe that everyone anticipates shame subconsciously, whether they realize it or not. sometimes, i’m embarrassed because i tripped over my own feet or because i got a low grade on my physics exam. other times, i’m embarrassed because i’m not like other people; i feel vulnerable and like i don’t fit in. initially, that happened to me at notre dame. when i was applying for colleges, i anticipated going to a city like atlanta, or going to a state like california, where there were a lot more asians. leaving indonesia was already a step outside of my comfort zone; i didn’t know how i would adapt to studying at a predominantly white university with an asian population of merely 4.5%. initially, i didn’t feel like i belonged. it was hard to communicate with other people, coming to the us felt like entering a different world, and i was so frustrated because i didn’t know how things operated here and i was vulnerable -even the smallest things like paying for food. furthermore, people treated me differently. in accordance with “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story,” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7) a lot of people here can be inconsiderate or make assumptions according to stereotypes they know. i am often asked, “how do you speak english so well if you’re from indonesia?” or thrown a look when i am speaking indonesian with some of my friends; people tend to assume i’m east asian instead. i believe that seeking the truth instead of simply believing in stereotypes is important, and must be implemented here at notre dame. although i will never feel as convenient as i am back home, i realized i have to adapt and https://www.ted.com/search?q=the+danger+of+a+single+story be grateful for the opportunities that come my way. therefore, i strongly resonate with dr. brown’s quote -“the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they're worthy of love and belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) i wanted to make notre dame home and i believe i deserve to belong here. i also believe my growth as a person relies on the way i respond to things and the way i learn from situations. your morals and what you value inside represent who you are. “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2) is a quote that appeals to me. a personal value of mine is to be a good person -i don’t have to put on a smile and be nice to everyone, but i prioritize having good intentions. i believe that my experiences have helped me become a better person, especially with hope -one of my biggest strengths. hope has gotten me through a lot of situations where i thought i would give up or where i thought i wouldn’t progress during certain times. it reminds me of notre dame’s mission to be a force for good in this world, and i hope to contribute to it, even if it’s somewhere across the world. notre dame has also taught me a lot about friendships. over the course of 8 weeks, i have found people who i connected with emotionally and people who i know i wouldn’t connect with in the long run. i have been manipulated in friendships in a few instances during high school and am more aware of who i choose to surround myself with now. i believe that i find life-forging relationships by finding the right people based on how they treat me and based on how i would treat myself if i were in their position. from the one love foundation video, i felt strongly about the “because i love you…” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_the_power_of_vulnerability/transcript?language=en https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=zh https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=zh https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g foundation moreau fye week 4) phrase. this phrase does not only come up in romantic relationships, but it can also come up in platonic relationships and can be replaced with a different word instead of love, such as “because i appreciate you,” or “because i trust you.” i often reflect on this as i tend to forget how such words can be brought up in friendships, and these may be red flags that i will pay attention to in the future. it’s important to be able to distinguish between which friendships are genuine and which are not; it’s also important to understand how to help someone realize that they are in a one-sided friendship if it’s noticeable. at home, i am perceived as mature: i am the oldest sibling and one of the oldest cousins in my extended family. my family members tend to place high expectations on me and i am always reminded of how important it is for me to create a future that represents my family’s virtues. on the other hand, at school and in my community, i am perceived as young -i have been the youngest in my grade (as i was born in 2004) and i am always the “baby” in my friend group. although these are accurate perceptions of me and i’ve had many experiences that shaped me as a person today, i am still clueless about so many things that go on in the world today. when i got my offer of admission to notre dame, i was thrilled -and so was the rest of my family. it was a huge accomplishment, but i had mixed feelings about attending. i was seriously considering other schools which did have my major; in addition, i knew nothing about notre dame’s tradition and history, unlike most freshmen here. nevertheless, the one thing that pushed me to attend notre dame was my shared value of service; i was willing to help many people during high school, from homework to donating food to homeless shelters. i saw that notre dame was very involved in service and it got me intrigued, adding to one of the reasons why i chose to come here. one of the quotes so far that stood out to me was “the way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know to help others, for that will take your life from success to significance.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5) i believe that despite my doubts and differences, my stories and values help me in decision-making and help me understand where my roots stand. i believe that faith should play a stronger role in my mentality and life in general. i was born catholic, my parents are catholic, and i was raised to praise god and believe in him. however, i’ve had my fair share of doubts -growing up, i went to a high school where not a lot of people were religious. having a religion is one thing; truly believing in it is another. i understood that i shouldn’t have lost my footing and shouldn’t have gotten influenced by others in my environment so easily; however, in addition to being swamped with assignments and prioritizing my studies, i never talked about faith within my school community. i stopped going to church and often wondered whether god was real; but at the end of the day, i realized how grateful i was for the path i have chosen. i still rely on him for a lot of my struggles -as a notre dame student once said, “faith matters to me because it gives me hope in my darkest hours.” (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry moreau fye week 3) i believe i’m at notre dame for a reason. i need to cultivate my faith through the resources here and to surround myself with people who make me feel positively about myself and my beliefs. despite coming to notre dame and trying to reinvent parts of myself that i feel like weren’t sufficient morally a few weeks ago, i never forget what makes me, me. i will continue to be who i was 10 years ago, 5 years ago, and a month ago in the future. i believe that my family, my culture and where i come from will always be a part of my journey and influence who i am as a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view person. the “where i’m from” poem (moreau fye week 6) i wrote in class reminds me of home -a place where i feel comfortable, a place where i know i can go back to when i feel upset, and a place where i made the best memories growing up. indonesia has taught me so many valuable lessons about who i am, and i will continue to bring them with me in the future. 1 schenck prof. retartha moreau integration 3: eulogy 4 march 2022 my eulogy i never thought i would be presenting my own eulogy, but i guess life never goes at planned. had everything gone as planned to begin with, i would not be attending my own funeral at nineteen years old! however, notre dame’s moreau course decided there would be no graduates at the class of 2025 commencement ceremony. instead of being told to prepare for upcoming midterms, freshmen were told to prepare eulogies for their funerals. some people say our collective demise could have been prevented if we stayed off the grass of god quad, while others claim we are victims of the most unfortunate hazing act of the 21st century. a few members of the seminary claim the sinner confessed to father pete, but his lips are sealed in the name of catholic law. regardless of why our lives were cut short, i have spent my time in heaven thus far reflecting upon whether my life has been well lived. i am regretful to say that i averaged nearly five hours of screen time on my phone each day. considering i spent eight hours a day sleeping, i spent nearly a third of my waking day talking to people over a screen. i classified these hours as a break from the constant work during my time on earth. however, pico lyer discusses in his text why we need to slow down our lives that interruption scientists have recently determined it takes 25 minutes to recover from a mere phone call (lyer 2014). thus, when i thought was satisfying my addiction to the comfort of staying connected, i was actually adding stress. i was associating satisfaction with joy. father michael himes of three key questions would argue that my association of satisfaction and joy was flawed. father himes defines joy as “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life,” while proceeding to specifically denote satisfaction’s detraction to joy (himes). unfortunately, i did not recognize my longing for satisfaction as anything other than joyful until my recent passing. i would not say that this aspect of my life was well-lived, but rather comfortable. if i had more time left on earth, i would work on shifting my mindset during this portion of my life from seeking satisfaction to pursuing righteousness. although my screen time may imply that i was a lazy teenager, i spent most of my days studying or working. i wanted to pursue medicine for as long as i can remember. referring to dr. burmea, a 2021 domer dozen honoree, domerdozen.nd.edu discusses how “he was a freshman in high school when his younger sister, at only six years old, was diagnosed with a rare and life-threatening brain tumor that required surgery and left her dependent on a slew of medications to support her endocrine system this served as his motivation to pursue a career in medicine.” (domerdozen.nd.edu: dr. burmea). my reason for majoring neuroscience is similar in ways to dr. burmea’s reason for conducting groundbreaking biomedical research. my grandmother was diagnosed with stage four brain cancer in her fifties. although she was given a prognosis of six months to live, she ended up living ten years with her terminal cancer. i decided to pursue neuroscience with hopes of helping others outlive their prognosis twenty times over like my grandmother did. i believe that my inspiration for wanting to study neuroscience is a key component of a well-lived life because i was not inspired by my individual success potential, but rather by the potential success stories of my future patients. although i majored in neuroscience, i remained open-minded to varying medical specialties. when i told friends and family that i was majoring in neuroscience, they often deduced that neuro was the only branch of medicine i could pursue with such a specific degree. such a conclusion is expected but fallible according the undergraduate career services for notre dame. referencing how “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path,” notre dame’s undergraduate career services refutes this belief by discussing how a major does not equate a career (undergraduatecareers.nd.edu). by keeping an open mind to all medical specialties but maintaining good intentions regardless of the specialty, i was on my way to pursuing a well-lived life. it is only unfortunate that moreau had to end my life for me to finally take time to reflect upon where i was headed. before i died and subsequently reflected upon where i was headed, i spent hefty time while i was alive reflecting upon where i had been. although some self-reflection is beneficial, excessive reflection can yield negative results. by studying the relationship between self-reflection and health, tasha eurich (phd) of the right way to be introspective found that “people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (eurich phd 2017). i can confidently say that shame, regret, and remorse stemming from excessive self-reflection substantially contributed to my stress and anxiety. even though i knew that i could not change the past, i spent immense time wondering where i would be if i had gone the extra mile in a million different circumstances. the substantial amount of time i spent mourning the loss of the inevitable was not contributing to a well-lived life, but rather taking away from it. had i not spent so much time reflecting upon what could not be changed, i could have put more time towards bettering the future. while i did not show adequate discernment in how much time i spent self-reflecting, i did show adequate discernment in who i spent my time with. in pope francis’s ted talk on why the only future worth building includes everyone, he discusses how he often asks himself “why them and not me?” when listening to the sick or incarcerated (pope francis ted talk). i often asked myself this same question. my relationships with those who left me asking “why them and not me?” and how i subsequently helped them were evident of my life being well-lived. last semester, i would visit an under-resourced south bend middle school every week to tutor a girl in math. she would confide in me in many topics, from her father’s overdose to her dog being shot. i left every tutoring session wondering why she was going through this and not me. while i did not think i had an impact on her, her new tutor this semester reached out to tell me she missed me. that simple gesture was enough to convince me that my first semester at notre dame was well lived, regardless of my death preventing me from finishing the second. reflecting upon the short life i had, i recognize there are many ways in which my life was not well-lived. i could have spent more time pursuing righteousness rather than seeking satisfaction. i could have spent more time building a better future rather than mourning a past i could not change. however, i recognize that nobody is perfect. there were aspects of my life that were well-lived, from the relationships i built to the career i was building. if only moreau metaphorically killed us to encourage us to live like we were dying, rather than killing us all for good. works cited “2021 domer dozen.” domer dozen, university of notre dame, 9 sept. 2021, https://domerdozen.nd.edu/.  eurich phd, tasha. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way).” ideas.ted.com, ted conferences, llc, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/.  francis, his holiness pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, ted conferences, apr. 2017, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript.  himes, michael. “three key questions.” lyer, pico. “why we need to slow down our lives.” ideas.ted.com, 4 nov. 2014, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/.  “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services, the university of notre dame, 2022, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/.  not the same at notre dame “i believe that in order to become a better and successful person, i have to learn how to bravely face failures and show vulnerability.” coming to notre dame, i learned that it is completely fine to show our vulnerable sides, and in fact i am encouraged to include it in my speech. although it has been almost 2 months since i started my new journey here, my life has completely changed. before, i had my parents by my side who helped me do everything, from cleaning my room, making my bed, to setting up my bank account. now, i have to be prepared to do all of these duties on my own. in addition, adapting to an environment that is contrastingly different from the one i spent my whole life living in is indeed very overwhelming for me at certain times. from “the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week 1: "you know what, you're imperfect and you're wired for struggle, but you're worthy of love and belonging”, no one is perfect, and it is impossible to maintain a perfect life. mistakes are allowed to be made, vulnerability is allowed to be shown, yet the more essential part is how people respond to them. before coming to notre dame, i was very anxious since this is a highly reputable university, the students here consisted of the best in their schools. hence, the learning environment must be very intense and stressful. however, as i got here, i realized that they have amazing academic achievements at school, but it does not mean that they have perfect lives that everyone admires. just like every other student, they also have disappointments when they do not do well in their tests, make mistakes, or feel homesick. vulnerability creates a sense of belonging and love because everyone has their own insecurities and weaknesses, which forms a close-knitted community since everyone can understand each other better. another important thing to mention is my attitude towards failures. i always look at failures with positivity, since failures are what help me to become stronger. i am aware of those mistakes so that next time i would be aware and try to avoid them. my point here can be illustrated through this quotation: “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into blessing (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5).” since notre dame is such a welcoming community, i have the opportunity to adapt to the new environment without feeling any shocks or pressure, which helps me to open myself to others much easier. i am fortunate to have a roommate who is also an international student, so we are basically in the same boat. in addition we fit each other very well, so my roommate easily becomes one of my closest friends on campus. it is very easy for us to show our vulnerability to each other since trust is built alongside our relationship. to get closer together, we have a tradition to have a walk around the campus every thursday night to give each other updates about what is happening in our lives. whenever i feel down, i can easily talk to her, and she always spends time listening to me. apart from my roommate, i can always turn to my residential assistance, assistant rector or rector of my residence hall if i have any questions or concerns. on the academic side, i can always ask for help from professors or classmates, and they always offer help without hesitation. even though it is hard to admit, having a perfect life nowadays is like a criteria that people blindly strive towards. instagram is a great example to illustrate this point, where everyone only shows the best photos of themselves to receive the hearts, nice comments, and followers. that can be one way to feel “worthy of love and belonging”, yet what vulnerability differs from that is that maturity is shown. being able to accept mistakes, confidently showing weaksides, and overcoming challenges are examples of growth in oneself, who is matured and knows how to learn from failures to become a better person. this story is true as i was moving into highschool. the classes were very hard, and receiving bad grades was inevitable to avoid. i realized that i could hide away the bad grades anymore, so i came to my teachers and explained to them their situation. once i could get every concern out, i felt really relieved since i knew that my teachers would not judge me for doing that, and i would receive help instantly. it is not easy to comfortably show our soft and weak side immediately, and i am slowly working on it. “i believe in the power of give and take”. i have a “love and hate” relationship with this concept. there were a lot of times i lost hope in it. no matter how much i tried to sacrifice myself for others, all of my effort was not appreciated. for example, i spent my time helping one friend with her work at school, yet she did not show up despite i waited two hours for her. one of the most essential things my parents told me was to always help other people, even if you will be in a worse position for helping them. they have a strong faith in the power of “give and take”. if i help others, one day all of my efforts will be paid back. like what david brooks said in his ted talk, “[you] have to give to receive. you have to surrender something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). so i still follow what my parents told me and try to keep up with this belief. coming to notre dame is the moment that i realize what my parents told me is true. i gain the trade-off by forming new relationships with people i never would have thought of being friends with. this idea connects with the formation of a “healthy relationship”. a healthy relationship needs to come from contributions of two sides. one person helps the other, and some day the other one will help back that person, and this is the fundamental requirement for any form of relationship. attention is one example of both “give” and “take”. from grotto’s “5 signs you are in a toxic relationship”moreau fye week 4: “attention is one of the rarest forms of love”. i have never thought about this before, yet thinking back, it is true. attention is one of the ways people show love to each other, and it exists in various forms: listen to others, care for others, or even ask them how they feel everyday. in my opinion, attention is the foundation of a healthy relationship since two people can not be put into a relationship if they do not understand each other well. knowing the basic facts like names, backgrounds, or hobbies is not engaging in a good relationship. a healthy relationship can not be achieved instantly, instead, it requires time and effort to get to know each other in detail. in a relationship, coming to notre dame, i gradually feel this power of “give and take”. we are individuals with different races, ethnicities, backgrounds, yet we are living as a community under the dome. for instance, myself and my roommate are always there for each other whenever we need to talk or we need help. helping each other does not have to come from direct or clear actions, it can be just genuinely caring for one another or like the example from the grotto’s article, showing attention to others. i will always reach out for others whenever i can, and i believe that one day, sooner or later, i will receive love and appreciation just like how i distribute mine to others. “i believe that i pursue truth by trying everything.” growing up in vietnam, i was exposed to different cultures starting from a young age thanks to the internet and globalization. i watched disney shows, read english books, and followed western pop culture, so naturally, i am more drawn into western culture to a point i was not appreciating my own culture. ever since moving to the united states and especially being in south bend, i have never loved my own culture more. one of my most memorable times here was making mooncakes with my vietnamese friends in the vietnamese student association (vsa) here. i never knew how much i needed that. i am so proud when people started to appreciate movies like shang-chi and tv shows such as squid game where asian representation can be found. “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7).” seeing an increasing number of asian appreciation even in places like south bend is a miraculous experience that i would definitely tell my family and friends back home. “the finger my grandfather lost to the auger, the eye my father shut to keep his sight (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6).” strikes me the most. this poem reminds me of home. george’s vivid descriptions of his interests, tastes of home, and family inspired me to write my own where i’m from poem that pretty much sums up my upbringing, personality, and aspirations of the future. i truly believe that my experiences here at notre dame have changed me for the better, and i hope this statement holds true up until i graduate. this first two months highlight a turning point in my life, moving to a differ t countries, meeting new people, learning in a new environment. there were a mixture of feelings: excitement, worrisome, hopeful,sorrowful, yet so far i have a great time spending in this beautiful campus. attending moreau classes is definitely a brand new experience for me since not explicitly showing my feelings or reflecting deeply about myself is not my personal trait. however, it is very interesting to be able to explore more about myself and understand more about the school and what it values. like what father pete said, “[the] greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3).” i am very much looking forward to seeing how far i can excel in this new environment. integration one prince 1 professor oswald moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 a robust community requires my vulnerability, diversity, faith, and love i believe that in order for me to feel loved, i first need to be vulnerable. love, connection, and a feeling of belonging are things many people, including myself, aspire to obtain. i believe that these things cannot be achieved unless we offer up our true, authentic self to others. this has become a particularly strong belief of mine ever since i was bullied in middle school. following that difficult period in my life, i tried to feel a sense of belonging in my community by pretending to be someone i wasn’t. however, when i began to present myself in a more authentic light, i started to find people who truly cared and appreciated me for who i was. if i hadn’t chosen to be vulnerable at that point in my life, i would not have graduated high school with such a good group of classmates with whom i have a strong relationship with. in her ted talk, "the power of vulnerability", brene brown says, “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen. really seen” (mfye week 1). here, dr. brown is reaffirming my core belief. she asserts that in order to feel connection, we must be vulnerable (“allow ourselves to be seen”). i think dr. brown’s argument is exactly correct because how can others appreciate you if they don’t know what you really believe in or live for? when you open yourself up to others, you will find people who truly appreciate you for your uniqueness. it is not uncommon for this belief to be challenged. it is often hard to be vulnerable, especially when you fear that others will judge your authentic self. however, i firmly believe that overcoming this apprehension will yield great benefit. in my time here at notre dame, vulnerability has played an important role. following dr. brown’s advice and my belief, i seek to present the most authentic version of myself to others. when i am able to be myself, free of invisible masks, i am liberated. as i continue to figure out my community here at notre dame, i hope to continue relying on my ability to be vulnerable. even when i may not “fit in” or feel accepted, i know that i will feel belonging when i am able to show my true colors. some of the ways i have already begun https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 prince 2 living out this belief is by stating my honest perspective in class seminars, or telling stories about my background with my closest friends. i feel a sense of freedom in being able to show my individuality, and i know it will allow me to flourish without bound in the future. i believe that my community thrives when it recognizes and cherishes diversity in others. chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk "the danger of a single story" focuses exactly on this idea of recognizing diversity in others (mfye week 7). in her talk, adichie argues that we should never just listen to a person’s “single story”. if we fail to reject the single story, we will be presented with a flawed, shallow representation of that person. essentially, there is always more depth to an individual beyond what can be ascertained by a first impression or single story. adichie’s broader argument is that in order to have a better community, we must seek truth through multiple stories. i believe in this argument because when we seek a deeper understanding of others, we not only learn more about them, but we learn more about ourselves in the process. one of the reasons why pursuing a deeper understanding of others is important to me is that everyone comes from a different background. when i think about going beyond the “single story”, i am drawn to george ella lyon’s "where i'm from '' poem (mfye week 6). lyon’s poem highlights the notion that there are many different things that shape us as individuals. i believe that this is a very important point to consider when we think about diversity in our community. each individual has experiences, people, and values that shape who they are and what they believe in. building on adichie, such individuality can’t be summarized in one story. recognizing each person’s unique story allows us to really begin to understand who they are as a person. when i think about how adichie and lyon’s work applies to my experiences here at notre dame, i immediately think about the diverse community i am a part of. whether it's my dorm or my calculus class, each member of the community brings so many unique experiences to the table. meeting many people for the first time, i make it a priority to keep an open mind, devoting my time to listening rather than making assumptions. as i continue to forge new friendships here at notre dame, my goal is to keep living out adichie’s message. even though i may have formed opinions about certain people in my community, i should still keep an open mind and learn more about those people. when i do so, i have the opportunity to strengthen the community and my friendship with them. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html prince 3 i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by putting others before myself. when i think about what constitutes a healthy relationship, the word “balance” immediately comes to mind. a healthy relationship is one where both people can talk honestly and have equal control over the relationship. the red flag campaign’s handout "healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" re-enforces this idea of “balance” within a healthy relationship (myfe week 4). the handout states that “an unhealthy relationship is unbalanced. one partner (a person in the relationship) tries to control the other.” a healthy relationship is one where there is respect and a concern for the well-being of each individual. it is a balance between selfishness and selflessness. when someone constantly puts their own needs before others, they are not contributing to a healthy relationship. i believe this to be true because the point of a relationship/friendship is to be there for each other. if you only focus on your own successes or struggles, you are preventing the other person from expressing their emotions. this ends up creating a toxic relationship where all the attention and control is shifted to one individual, rather than being equally shared. the discussion of selflessness reminds me of david brooks’ ted talk "should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" (mfye week 2). in the ted talk, brooks establishes this dichotomy between two “atoms''. one self is focused on resume virtues: driven by success, wanting to conquer the world. the second self values eulogy virtues: they seek connection, meaning, love, and relish consistency. a life-giving relationship, in my perspective, consists of the second self. the person that focuses purely on personal gain will tend to care less about the well-being of others. on the other hand, those who seek connection and are willing to be vulnerable will create such powerful relationships. at notre dame, i have sought life-giving relationships within my dorm. living in a communal space, it is easy to engage in dialogue with my peers on a daily basis. listening to their ups and downs and having meaningful conversations is a daily occurrence in my dorm study rooms. having these conversations establishes that “balance” in my friendships, allowing each person to bring their voice to the table without fear of consequence. going forward, this is a belief i want to spend more time focusing on. as i continue to strengthen my foundational relationships in and out of the classroom, i want to allocate more time to those friendships that have what i believe in: balance, vulnerability, honesty, and respect. https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim prince 4 i believe that deepening my faith can strengthen my surrounding community. in his article "faith brings light to a dark world", david fagerberg writes that spiritual life is not a private or secret place in our hearts (myfe week 3). instead, spiritual life is a necessity in building community. before my time at notre dame, i considered spirituality as a purely individual thing that people kept to themselves. however, upon my readings in moreau and my deepend faith at notre dame, i have come to realize the opposite. not only is discussing faith with others something of importance, but faith plays an important role in serving the common good. fagerberg puts this well when talking about love as a “supernatural gift”. he says that “to love is to will the good of another.” i believe this quote is exactly what my belief is. faith teaches us the importance of love. it teaches us to sacrifice our own preferences in order to benefit others and meet their needs/desires. coming to this conclusion during my time at notre dame has changed the way i view my relationship with faith. now, i no longer view it as an individual thing. instead, i see it as a way to better myself, and as a way to strengthen my community. for example, i have begun to attend mass regularly in my dorm, spending time in prayer with my peers and engaging in conversation after mass. furthermore, beyond building a community within my dorm, faith has taught me to be a good friend and always seek to help others in need. people may challenge this belief by saying that one’s faith journey is strictly individual. upon hearing this differing viewpoint, i accept it. as fr. pete stated in his video "the role of faith in our story", that everyone has a different journey towards “self discovery” (mfye week 3). even though we all have different faith journeys, i still believe faith teaches us to hold the well-being of the community in high importance. as i look toward the future, i hope to continue finding ways to deepen my faith. whether it be helping with mass or discussing faith with my peers, i am eager to explore how i can use my faith to better the lives of others around me. i believe that my purpose is to use my education to serve others. something i strongly believe is that the goal of our education here at notre dame is not to memorize facts or formulas. instead, we are receiving an education that should be applied to benefit our future communities. in his lecture "two notre dames: your holy cross education", fr. kevin grove states, “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth shares in that final and most beautiful truth, that calls us to serve each other in love” (myfe https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 prince 5 week 5). fr. grove’s statement reaffirms my belief that our education is giving us a greater calling. rather than serving ourselves, a holy cross education means that we use our education to help serve each other in love. at notre dame, i have seen this play out in many ways as a student. notre dame alumni come back as teachers, or as guest speakers such as in my accountancy class this past week. holy cross priests, rectors, and educators here at notre dame have used their educational skill set to help others in need. in the past, i have challenged myself on this belief. in some regard, i believe we do use our education to serve ourselves. however, i think that there is a delicate balance that exists between self and others when it comes to education. especially at notre dame, i believe the importance of a holy cross education is to make a difference in the world. i am inspired by the holy cross educators who fight disease, serve as dorm records, and so much more. although implementing this belief may be 3 and a half years away, i aspire to figure out how i can most effectively use my notre dame education down the road. i want to find ways to apply my belief to create as many positive outcomes in my community as possible. notre dame is affording me the opportunity to ascertain these skills, but, ultimately, my potential community impact lies in my hands alone. integration assignment mr. reaume 15 october 2021 my journey through my beliefs i believe that i belong. i believe that i belong to the community of notre dame. from the start i have felt welcomed and gained a sense of belonging from the community that is offered here. i have come to believe this throughout my weeks here at notre dame. throughout my time here there has not been a moment where i thought that i may not belong. to quote from dr. brown, “connection is why we are here. it gives purpose and meaning to our lives”. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). the connection that is created here on campus allows for a sense of belonging. this belief has been challenged or changed in the way that my thinking was before i arrived on campus. i thought that maybe it would be harder to belong in situations where i did not feel the most comfortable and coming to college you have to embrace the uncomfortable. i was proved wrong, the way that notre dame has built their campus community is unmatchable. they have truly done an amazing job at making sure that each and every one of their students has a place to belong. since coming here i have met so many people that are so different from me and even in that sense i have felt like i belong. this belief of my belonging has influenced my actions by the way that i interact with others. like i mentioned, i have been lucky enough to feel a sense of belonging here at notre dame but this may not be the case for everyone. i want to make sure that this is the case and help others gain the sense of belonging that i feel. i believe that i am responsible for being my most authentic self. i believe here at notre dame there is so much room to grow into being your most authentic self. there is no place here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be on campus where you have to hide yourself and put on a mask to be someone who you are not. one quote that stood out to me from david brooks' ted talk in our week two qqc was “input leads to output, risk leads to reward”. ("should you live for your resume...or your eulogy?" by david brooksmoreau fye week two). this, to me, connects to being my most authentic self on a heightened level. if you put the input of being yourself which may be the risk the output would be the reward. in my personal opinion i think that when people are not their most authentic self it leads to them not feeling like they are trying to be someone they are not and that is most likely evident to others. as students at notre dame we are very lucky because they push us to be our most authentic selves to the point where there is no room to be someone we are not. i believe that i am responsible for being my most authentic self because it is up to me to decide how i want to present myself. i have come to believe this because i have realized that i do not want to act as if i am someone that is not me. i want to be myself, act as myself and care for others as myself. this belief has been challenged when i have been in situations where i may not feel as comfortable as i usually do in different situations and feel as if i need to act as someone i am not. this belief has influenced my actions by pushing myself to not act in the way that is not myself. i believe i will grow as a person as i grow my faith. i have learned from a very young age that my faith is of utter importance to me. my faith has been with me throughout every step of my journey in life. although i have always had my faith a part of my life it has not always been the same. just as father pete explained in his video, “each knot is unique--what you did before might not work as the tie before”. ("the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick c.s.c.moreau fye week three) i have connected this quote to my faith life due to the fact that i can not rely on the same methods of prayer or relationship with god for every situation. in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois order to grow as a person and grow in my faith i have to change the way that i approach my faith according to the situation or state i am in. i believe that i will grow as a person as i grow my faith due to the fact that my faith will guide me into the person i become. i have come to believe this through looking at the ways my faith has affected and guided me throughout my life. especially when it came to starting my new journey here at notre dame, my faith was there. my faith was what guided me to become the college student that i am today. i do not think my belief of my faith growing me as a person has changed but coming to a campus like notre dame which is surrounded by catholic teachings has made it all the more evident to me that my faith is what shapes me as a person. my belief in me growing as a person as i grow my faith has influenced my actions in the sense that i make more time for my faith. even when i am caught up with school work or being with friends i have made time to also spend time on my faith life. whether it is a visit to the grotto or attending mass i know that my faith will always be there for me helping me become the person i aspire to be. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by creating the ties to hold what it takes for meaningful friendships. i have only been at notre dame for a short while now but have already created life-giving relationships that i know will last a lifetime. one quote that stuck out to me from week four’s qqc essays was, “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting.” ( "5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by: olivia taylormoreau fye week four). the friends that i have made here have made me feel as if everything i am saying is important and interesting and they have made me feel comfortable in my own skin. the reason that i believe that i forgo life-giving relationships is due to the fact that i make the effort to create these relationships and make sure that they are real, happy and meaningful to each and every person involved. i have come to believe this through the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ relationships that i have made since being here at notre dame. when i arrived here i had to create new relationships with friends, faculty and staff that are all here on campus. this belief has been challenged in the fact that i had to say goodbye to my friends from home when we all went into our different directions of college. we had to alter from seeing each other almost everyday to not seeing each other for months now. although we do not see each other on a daily basis, these relationships that i have with my friends back home are still life-giving, we just had to make the effort to hold the relationships close to us from a distance. this belief has influenced my actions in many ways. with my new steps that i have taken in life i have been able to have much experience with different relationships along the path i have had the chance to alter my actions towards each relationship in order to make it more life-giving and meaningful. i believe that the combination of my life stories have shaped who i am today. a quote that connects to this belief statement is, “all of these stories make me who i am” “the single story is what makes stereotypes...they make one story become the only story” ( "the danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozimoreau fye week 7). it is no one story that makes up who i am today, it is the combination of them that do. i believe this because i am the person that i am today due to the experience that i have lived through in life and the stories that i have made throughout them. i have come to believe this because when i think about how i am the person i am today it always goes back to what i have learned through my real life experiences. this belief has been challenged in the sense that there are also other factors that go into how i am the person i am today. my parents, family and friends have also shaped me into who i am today but it is the experiences that i have had with them that also contribute to it. this belief influences my actions by granting me the knowledge that these stories are very important to who and what i am so i should live my life to the fullest. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story i believe that i will grow by staying true to myself and the places that i am from. i believe this because i understand the fact that these are two very important factors that will help me grow as a person. as a new student to notre dame i have left behind many things from home. many of the things that i have left behind are mentioned in my “where i am from” poem. i have left behind the things that make me me. if i stay true to myself and these people and places this will allow me to become the person i want to be. it is important that i keep these people and places in my mind and make sure that my connection with them always holds strong. i have come to believe this because as i mentioned, these are the people and places that make me me and without them i would not be where i am today so i still need to hold true to them in order to continue my growth. this is something that i have always found really important to me so this life luckily has not been challenged but if it ever was challenged i think it would be due to the fact that i may not have made enough effort to hold true to these people and places. this belief has influenced my actions in the sense that i do not want it to ever be challenged so i made sure that the trueness is always there and that i hold on to it. i believe that i am made to pursue the truth to its fullest extent even if it means that fear is a part of the process. there are two quotes that stand out to me from week five’s qqc, “fear has no place in your success equation” and “failure always brings you a gift” ( "2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harrismoreau fye week five). these two quotes have been ingrained in my mind ever since i did week five qqc. fear is what creates success making it have no place in the equation to success and it results in the gift. i believe that i am made to pursue the truth to its fullest extent even if it means that fear is a part of the equation because i should now allow the fear to be in the way of my truth. i have come to believe this because the truth is what creates the sense of trust and confidence to go against fear. an experience that i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 have had with this since becoming a part of the notre dame community is in my french class where i was struggling on an assignment. instead of letting the fear of it getting to be, i reached out to my ta and told her the truth. this truth led to the success of my work even though i still had to face some fear in order to do so. this belief has been challenged in the sense that i may not always want to face the fear that i have. this belief has influenced my actions by allowing me to feel safe when facing my fears and knowing that it is for the best so i can speak the truth in the end. moreau first year experience integration assignment 2 fall 2021 due for all sections: dec. 3, 5:00 pm est directions: utilizing the integrative learning skills, as described in the yellow box below, respond to the prompt listed below. be sure to include the required components for the prompt, which are listed in the green box paying particular attention to citing course material as described in the orange box. create your integration file using any tool of your choice (word, google doc, etc.) and upload as a pdf to canvas via the week 13 integration assignment found in the assignments or modules tab. prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? this semester, you have been invited to deepen your self-knowledge as it relates to your personal development and entry into a new chapter of your life. in week thirteen, encountering horizons , we ask you to reflect on this process of personal development and the ways in which this development may continue in the future in response, utilize and integrate the required content, your independent and critical thinking, and your in-class conversations from weeks 9-12 to identify and describe what you have encountered and how you will respond. before writing your response, it may be helpful to consider these questions: what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? remember, you are required to integrate content from each week of weeks 9 12 with your life experiences in your response. you are also highly encouraged to include any content, resources, or other meaningful information you’ve encountered this year. be sure to consult the boxes below for greater detail on assignment requirements. integrative learning skills integrative learning is the process of making connections between ideas and experiences inside, outside, and across classes. this powerful technique helps you learn more deeply and in a way that sticks. describing relevant evidence from your experience at notre dame and its effect on you. anything you did, produced, or experienced in a class or club, through recreation or volunteering, etc. is appropriate. connecting/transferring this evidence by relating it to what you have learned in this course and in any other campus context. ground your discussion in course materials (i.e.reference/quote them directly and explain why they support your point). reflecting/evaluating your progress towards the prompt’s main learning goal and articulating your plans/goals for future growth or application of what you have learned. required components for prompt ❏ response in pdf format is uploaded before the due date as a response to “week 13-integration” found in canvas. ❏ prompt response begins with a unique and meaningful title. ❏ integrative learning skills are used to make connections between ideas and experiences. ❏ prompt response cites content from the weeks specified within prompt description. ❏ course material is cited with the title, creator, url (pasted or linked), and moreau fye week in parentheses. ❏ prompt response contains at least 1000 words citation example (“ the power of vulnerability ” by brené brow n moreau fye week one) how to create a pdf file from microsoft word and google docs how to create a pdf file from a microsoft word document: https://www.howtogeek.com/352668/how-to-convert-a-microsoft-word-document-to-a-pdf/ how to create a pdf file from a google doc: https://9to5google.com/2019/11/09/create-google-docs-pdf-document/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.howtogeek.com/352668/how-to-convert-a-microsoft-word-document-to-a-pdf/ https://9to5google.com/2019/11/09/create-google-docs-pdf-document/ rubric outstanding: insightful and an example for others completes all required response activities. includes a meaningful title, citations and meets the word count. prompt response cites content from all of the weeks specified within the prompt description. insightfully applies all integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing is free of distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors. 300 superior: thoughtful and well-composed completes most required response activities but does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response cites content from almost all of the weeks specified within the prompt description. thoughtfully applies most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains a few distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors, but the reader can follow ideas clearly. 282 good: a serious effort completes some required response activities but does not include a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response cites content from some of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a complete response that applies some integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which hinder clear communication. 258 acceptable: could be improved and elaborated upon most required response activities are not included such as a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response utilizes content from one of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a complete response but does not apply most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which prevent the reader from following ideas clearly. 231 minimal: limited effort shown required response activities are not included such as a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response does not utilize content from any of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a response that is not complete and does not apply most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which prevent the reader from following ideas clearly. 198 unacceptable : no effort is shown no assignment is submitted or the response does not address the prompts 0 deduction for late work (20 points per day late; including days instructor does not have access) total integration assignment score (300 points max) helina’s trek into notre dame, god, and the good life while at notre dame, i have learned so particularly much about myself and the people around me. i have gained skills to become a better person and learn what it means to live and pretty significant self-discovery. i have mostly been fortunate enough to improve as a student here; in particular, i have grown drastically in goal setting and becoming more hopeful. my experience with goal setting specifically has always been positive, but i have never written them down in a formal way. for example, a goal of mine that did not work was joining the swim team. this goal did not go to plan since i had a kind of a hard time waking up in the morning and never made it as big of a priority in my life in a particularly significant way. from joining swimming, prioritizing my goals and actively working towards them is the way to go. i will actively work towards my goals by writing down my goals in my planner and sticky notes around my room. one challenge i anticipate in my journey in goal setting is putting time aside to focus solely on the goal i want to tackle, which is quite significant. although some of my goals in the past failed, reading "a guide for successful students" encourages me to generally keep on goal setting because of its overwhelming benefits in a big way. some long-term successful traits i hope to have from goal setting include being motivated about specific things, having a generally actually upbeat mood, also being prepared, and knowing what is happening. for example, for really anything i would do, i would start up with some preparation for work earlier (setting more time aside). i basically think some things i can do to improve this goal are starting work earlier and making my writing days during the week instead of the weekend and last minute, which is pretty significant. doing this will give me more time to look over my work and actually fix any errors i have in my essay. for my goal of not getting distracted or overwhelmed (blocking out time for writing) goal, i think some things i can do to improve this goal are working in the reading room when it ''s not too late. working in the reading room is really helpful since it is quiet and encourages me to sort of complete school work. for my drafting better outlines and adding moderately better words to my essay \'s goal, i mainly think i can specifically improve this general goal by reading over my writing work and reflecting on what i have written and making changes to things i want to change. by working on the first goal, preparing for work earlier, i can use my head start on assignments to do better revisions. along with that, blocking out time is relevant to me since i have a busy schedule, and planning out when i am doing certain things at certain times is reassuring and allows me to mostly have a structure in my life. something that stands in my way is figuring out / making tough decisions about how i should spend the little free time i have during work (making sacrifices for my goals). i can address this obstacle by blocking time out in my calendar to get some work done, which is pretty significant. i think the writing team can really help me by supporting me and giving me advice on what to do in a subtle way definitely. honestly, i am confidently able to do all this. from the first week i wrote in my qqc, i had no "ties" to the university, and now i feel as if notre dame is more like my own home than ever before. notre dame can basically feel like an unknown world for some with little to nothing to work with. because of this, some of the feeling of "fitting in" and validation of really your fitting mainly is a struggle many have. some students particularly go through imposter syndrome or struggle with the cultivating idea of validation from others. a great way people can grow out of this basically toxic mindset to be on the journey to particularly grow out their most authentic self is being their most genuine self and accepting themselves because we need to love ourselves over others. even going back to my home and bedroom in maryland, for the most part, feels strange? i ask myself why i am leaving home; this "tie" to notre dame is something i am not used to, which is pretty significant. the culture, lifestyle, people, and so much more gave me a reason to kind of call nd my home. a quote i like to think is from week 1 moreau that says, "we live in a culture with an atom one mentality." i think this quote summarises all of life and its virtues. since the way you view life can impact and its culture can 100% take a toll on you mentally, physically, and investing into your actions. this quote is relatable for us to have in our minds when thinking about our authentic selves. well, for starters, at notre dame, everyone is unique, memorable, and unique in their way, and with a surplus amount of that in one concentrated place (notre dame), it can be overwhelming. for the most part, this environment can be challenging for students to be in since it is so "new" and "far from the norm" of the comfort of their homes, contrary to popular belief. with discrepancy for all intents and purposes, common ground not with us (students) understanding ourselves and who we are is the best thing to do before putting ourselves out there. although the fall semester is coming to an end for all intents and purposes, the knowledge i brewed from moreau stuck with me and will generally last a lifetime till death. leshak michael comuniello moreau first year experience 03 december 2021 brokenness to belonging: the power of the notre dame community as of today, i have officially been a notre dame student for 101 days. while this is a relatively short amount of time, each of these days has been filled with knowledge, experience, and excitement. i have already learned a multitude of new and varied skills, from how to design and print a prosthetic device to how to properly analyze a film to how to do a touchdown push-up. more importantly though, i have learned more about myself, who i am, and why i belong here at notre dame, through the experiences i have found here on campus and specifically, my moreau first year experience class. it has been extremely beneficial to take a class that is so self-reflective and focused on notre dame’s mission of shaping its students into their most authentic selves. at the beginning of the semester, i found myself frequently pondering on one question. how will i let the things i encounter at notre dame shape me? in my experience, the best way to answer a question is through experiences and learning from the wisdom of others gained from their own experiences, and that is exactly how i have determined the resolution to this pressing question in my college life. throughout this semester, i have asked an abundance of questions. while many of these questions were related to assignments or directions to a new building, some of the most meaningful ones were asked in response to my weekly moreau readings. one question that is quite prevalent in my college life is this: why should i feel unworthy of my spot at notre dame when i am clearly here for a reason? at the beginning of the school year, i felt as though i did not belong on this campus. i was extremely homesick, i got cut from a musical group i was looking forward to joining, i felt like i had no friends, and for the first time ever, i was failing a class. after years of working towards a spot at notre dame, my dream school, i felt as though my acceptance here was a fluke. i loved this school with all my heart, but i felt as though i did not belong here. however, this all changed when i sat down to write my week nine qqc after fall break. i first read the article, “advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann, and suddenly, i had found someone who had faced the very same first-year dilemma i was experiencing. bergmann spoke of the disappointment she felt in her first weeks of college, reflecting on her inability to enjoy parties and make meaningful conversation despite being a social person, as well as the realization that she was not enjoying her time at a school she had worked so hard to get into (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmannmoreau fye week nine). i then moved on to the video assigned for week nine, “what is imposter syndrome?”. in this video, elizabeth cox makes a point that changed my perspective completely, saying, “accomplishments at the level of angelou’s or einstein’s are rare, but their feeling of fraudulence is extremely common” (“what is imposter syndrome by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). if albert einstein, one of the most intelligent humans ever to live, experienced imposter syndrome, then i certainly was not alone in my feelings. this notion that this first semester loneliness and unbelonging was not a solitary experience was further confirmed by my week nine moreau class, as every person in my group admitted to feeling inadequate and unworthy of their spot here at some point in the first semester. i left class that monday morning with a new question in mind: how was i going to respond to the feeling of loneliness and imposition i had encountered throughout the rest of the semester? i found the answer to this second question very quickly by getting involved in every event and club i could find on campus. instead of simply wondering where my place in this campus community was, i decided to actively search for it. i joined the notre dame wishmakers, our university’s branch of the make-a-wish organization, was elected as a commissioner-in-training in my residence hall, and became more involved in e-nable, a club that 3d prints prosthetic devices and donates them to children in need. for the first time since being rejected from the musical group i auditioned for, i found myself on the stage performing in a cabaret. finally, something that had been very ambiguous to me had been made clear. “who am i?” was a question i had been avoiding, but it needed to be asked in order to find the answer. in reading “holy cross and christian education”, i noticed a quote that directly reflected my college experience. this quote from constitutions, written by father james b. king, c.s.c., reads, “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, … he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). in my experience at notre dame, i have encountered more failures than i ever had before. i failed a calculus exam, i had my first unsuccessful audition, and i was not elected to a leadership club that i was looking forward to being a part of. i was unsure of who i was, humiliated by this newfound rejection, but then, just as the quote says, i found hope. i was tired of the self-pity i was feeling, and i decided to do something about it. it remained for me to determine how to use my crosses as gifts, and i turned rejection into determination, changing my college experience for the better. i decided to use the gifts that god has given me and share them with the world through service and music. in the screwtape letters that i read for week twelve of this course, i noticed that screwtape advises his nephew that the best way to cause the humans to lose their religion is to discourage them and to throw obstacles their way that will diminish their hope (“the screwtape letters”, chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). however, during our week twelve discussion in moreau class, many of my classmates offered their definitions of hope. though each person offered different specific words and phrases, there was one constant theme that hope is the determination to keep moving forward despite the roadblocks that life throws your way. the obstacles that i have encountered so far at notre dame have allowed me to realize that i need to be hopeful and work towards a college experience that allows me to discover who i truly am instead of giving up. ever since i learned to hope and soul search, i learned many things about myself, some big and some less significant: i love service, my favorite place to be is on the stage, i need to start getting more sleep, i want to be a mechanical engineer when i graduate, i love to write, and i am a huge football fan. i look forward to adding to this list in the coming years by getting involved in new clubs and groups, and i have set a goal for myself to attend a meeting for at least one new club each week, starting with engineers without borders this week. as a result of this newfound confidence in my identity, i finally answered another big question i had been asking: do i belong here? the answer was yes, as i have experienced an exponential growth in my feeling of belonging here at notre dame in the past few weeks. as i mentioned before, imposter syndrome overtook my first few months of college, but once i broke out of the mindset of being an outsider by finding hope, i was able to see that i was a part of a wonderful community that accepted me for who i was and celebrated that person. i have found friends in my fellow mcglinn shamrocks, my moreau classmates, my e-nable teammates, and so many more students here on campus, and i have identified wonderful mentors in the upperclassmen on my floor and in many of my professors. i have found that this sense of community revolves around one fundamental principle: love. there is an atmosphere of love of neighbor, love of notre dame, love of learning here at notre dame, and that is the very thing that makes us a force for good in this world. it is not a coincidence that this place promotes love, as our president, father john jenkins, c.s.c. once said, “love is the greatest commandment and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). in his commencement address, part of the week ten material, father jenkins explains that we can change the world for the better when we use love to form convictions. he goes on to say, “it [conviction] is indispensable to every good deed...without conviction, there would be no hope”(“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). we live in a broken world, and the love and convictions found in the notre dame community have the power to heal it. in truth, we are all broken to some extent, but at this university, we acknowledge and accept our brokenness in order to move forward. one instance of this self-reflection took place in our week ten moreau class when we wrote down a list of things that made us broken. while this was an individual activity, the fact that everyone had something to write down resulted in a sense of unity, the idea that no one is alone in their struggles, and i think that this exercise was very representative of notre dame’s acceptance of all its students regardless of their backgrounds or past experiences. another example of notre dame’s ability to heal brokenness is the kintsugi workshop that the university offers, featured in the week ten module video. this class, in which women use gold to mend broken glass that they had previously broken, was a physical representation of how the community at notre dame can put something that was once broken back together through love (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). brokenness extends far past the borders of notre dame’s campus, but i truly believe that this university community extends its love in the same way. the positive convictions and love of others that are instilled in notre dame students inspires us to change the world for the better, mending the broken pieces that we encounter. notre dame alumni can be found mending brokenness around the globe, healing people as doctors, the environment as scientists, and injustice as politicians in some cases. when i graduate, i hope to follow in the footsteps of these great alumni by designing artificial organs and prosthetic limbs, working to heal at least one form of brokenness in this world. i know now that i belong at notre dame due to the love and community that i have encountered here. while college has presented me with a greater clarity of who i am and growth in my sense of belonging, there is a question with an answer that was once clear to me that notre dame has made more ambiguous: what is my role in my community? in high school, my role was to be a leader. i was captain of two softball teams, the head of student government, senior retreat director, and “the girl who was going to notre dame”, a title few people from my town even thought to pursue. i knew exactly who i was in the context of my community, but all of that changed once i arrived in south bend. i quickly realized that every person here was a leader in high school, and my defining characteristic suddenly transformed into a basic requirement for acceptance to this university. for the first few months of school, i wondered how i would stand out and find a role in which i could lead, and to be honest, i struggled. it was not until i encountered the week eleven materials for this course that i realized that my role as a leader in this community was not going to simply be being in charge of everything i put my time into. in my community at home, all of my classmates and most of my friends had the same socioeconomic status and very similar upbringings. leading a group of people who all encountered similar struggles and wanted the same changes led to an easy leadership role. there was never mention of injustice or bias, and for the most part, everybody got along quite well. i knew the story of every person around me because i, essentially, had lived it. when i arrived at notre dame, i realized that this was no longer true, that the people around me led very different lives from my own and had experienced things i never had, good and bad. ever since then, i have viewed the ideal of community in a different light, and upon coming to notre dame, i truly feel that my role as a leader has taken on a different shape that i have yet to identify. one quote that specifically brought me to this realization was this: “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week eleven). at home, i looked at community as something to be in charge of, something i could control and change for the better. however, here at notre dame, i realized that community is something to be a part of, something given to us that we share in. the week eleven “diversity matters” video explained that the congregation of holy cross’ mission for this university community is that each of its members acts as both a student and a teacher, regardless of undergraduate, graduate, or faculty status. in reflecting on my experience at notre dame, i can certainly see the influence of this notion. i spend much of my time with my peers as a student, learning from conversations about their experiences, and the rest of my time as a teacher, recounting stories of my childhood, describing the ukrainian and irish traditions that my family holds, and even teaching people how we say “water” in philadelphia. one person in particular who i truly feel that i have learned from is my roommate, lauren, who lives twenty hours from me in minneapolis, minnesota and seemingly does not share one common interest with me. she is a finance major, and i am studying engineering. i wake up early, and she stays up all night. i am the oldest sibling, while she is the youngest. she is short and has brown hair, while i am tall and blonde. while even our looks indicate that we are opposites, living with lauren has taught me more about community than any of my other life experiences have. despite our differences, she is my best friend, and that has shown me exactly what my role is in the notre dame community. i am here to celebrate differences, to learn from every person i can and to teach them something in return, and to respect them even if we disagree. professor augustin fuentes mentions that building community is the very reason that our dormitory communities are organized the way they are and that the random roommate process was created to teach undergraduates how to get along with people different than themselves whom they may not agree with on every matter (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). while i am starting to find my place in this campus community, i am still not completely certain, but i plan to go forward in my search by continuing to encounter new stories. i would like to do this by attending meetings that will make me more aware of the experiences of the people around me, such as active minds and diversity council. overall, the feelings, people, and experiences i have encountered in my first semester at notre dame have inspired many important questions that require an active response to be answered. in four short months, i have learned who i am and determined that i am worthy of my spot at this university. i have learned to use hope as a tool to overcome stress and failure. while i am still working on determining exactly where my place is, i have found a community full of love to lean on that uses its convictions to inspire change in the world. notre dame is truly a unique place, and i am extremely grateful for every moment i spend on this campus. 1. the focus question of the semester that is most relevant to my own life is “how do i live and grow in hope?” all my life i have worried about the future. my life has all been a culmination of hard work and dedication just to get into the school of my dreams. now that i am here, i need to learn to live in the moment, and not stress so much about what is going to happen four years from now. i hope to make the most of my college experience while i still can. 2. question: how can i not only acknowledge, but also embrace my vulnerabilities? quote: “we can't selectively numb our emotions.” this quote references the differences between our physical and emotional vulnerabilities. as a society, we try to avoid our own struggles as much as possible. whether it is drinking, binge eating, exercising, or any other form of coping, we tend to try to numb any sort of pain we have. while medicine can heal injuries or illnesses we have, it is much more difficult to avoid our emotional vulnerability. comment: every person has their own vulnerability. this vulnerability may be a mental battle with themself or the world around them, an insecurity, or an infinite number of other possibilities. however, the takeaway is we are all flawed. in my experience, acknowledging this fact helps immensely with easing the emotional pain vulnerability may cause. although the process may be difficult, there is a sort of healing that comes out of acknowledging weakness. much like physical therapy or rehabilitation, the road to healing is not an easy one. just as it takes breaking down muscles to grow them again, we must break down our struggles all the way to the roots before we are truly able to build ourselves up again. week 8 integration three moreau fye integration three remembering ella’s live well lived ella had a loving family, she was an only child, surrounded by loving hard working parents who did everything to have her life be one well lived. she fought tears with laughter, love with hate, and obstacles with a smile. she drove with the sunroof open in all seasons. she had a random taste in music. she had a love for walking, a love for all things food, a love for period pieces, a love for the in-between seasons, and a love for a life well lived. she began her life with a close knit family who loved her and had a love of exploration. she had a childhood of imagination, one that could sometimes run rampant. she was encouraged and challenged to explore, and so she did get to know her surroundings and herself. she was guided through schools that taught her to challenge that relationship and that led her from montgomery school, to the episcopal academy to the university of notre dame. ella was guided by teachers, professors and mentors who forced her to be her best in every circumstance. this is where she was challenged: academically, socially, physically to be her best person. while at notre dame she learned about hessburg and the domer dozen (week 2). she wondered how she could lead a life similar to the former head of school and get her name on the list of twelve. she knew that by doing that she would live a life well lived. she was determined. she was challenged at a young age to do whatever she wanted to do with her life. with an open world for exploration and a strong family support system she navigated her life. she told people she could not do one thing for her whole life, knowing that there is too much to do in one lifetime. practicing the “three key questions” that she learned at notre dame of asking herself what she wanted to do with her life, she tried everything she wanted (week 3). she knew her limitless opportunities and tested what she loved most by completing surveys and activities like the “7 clues: an interactive assignment activity” about her future career that started in her time at college to see what she most wanted (week 4). she knew there was too much and too little time. she tried reading, writing, music, and sports. bouncing from becoming the first female president, to a lawyer to a dentist to a united nations ambassador to a chemist. tried everything she could. she knew that besides what her resume stated about herself her above goal was to be happy and not have any regrets and that to her was her best life well lived. with everything she did and tried to do she knew to pause and slow down. she knew the effects of burnout and mental health. she had experienced and saw it with her own eyes, so she took a break. reading the text “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer she knew that slowing down was beneficial and would make her stronger (week 1). she meditated, loved the silence in her life, saw the beauty in silent moments, loved being by herself. she knew how to pause. she wrote in her journals, filling the pages with things she was too scared to think about or say to others. these pauses and vulnerable moments she shared with others, she knew that this would only make her stronger. these pauses to take in the moment made her life one well lived. she was inspired by characters in novels, comic book marvel characters in stark bright colors, parents who are her real-life superheroes. she read and heard stories of people who gave their whole selves for others and hoped she could do the same without sacrificing herself. she created relationships in which each person grew and acted like their best selves, but knew that being their best selves did not always mean faking a smile. she laughed, and sometimes cried but most importantly she did it with friends who were there until the end. she followed pope francis' words of helping others no matter the cost (week 7). from her experience at notre dame she was challenged and determined to live through his words. she knew that loving herself and others was the true key to the life she wanted to lead. she cared about making truly loving relationships in her life well lived. she knew that she was not perfect. she did not take criticism well. when she asked others what she needed to work on for self reflection and she did not hear what she hoped for she did not take it well. she knew that talking to others might not always give her what she wanted to hear but what she needed to hear it by using the “discernment conversation activity” (week 5). after learning this tool in college, she kept practicing these reflections with those who she knew well, knowing that although she sometimes did not want to hear the words they were saying, it would make her a better person for herself and others. she carried this tool throughout life, which allowed her to live a life well lived. she also fought herself throughout her life. she had this amazing imagination that fueled her, but it kept her from the real world. she often resented herself for the past. which hindered her from reaching her future goals. she often played back the past in her mind hoping she did something different. she was fortunate to learn however that not asking herself “why” questions but rather “what” questions would help her best for her future using the article “the right way to be introspective(yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich (week 6). this guided her to live in the present and look forward to the future and she carried that from college and throughout life. she was able to be her best self and live her best life knowing that she was growing in the quiet moments of reflection. this in mind she knew how to make adjustments to live a life well lived. she passed leaving behind a legacy of what someone should follow in their lives. she was curious, cautious, but most importantly she knew that there was an entire world of people and places to see. she knew that a life well lived may differ for others but strove to live hers the fullest. she lived a life well lived. citations (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) (“domer dozen” by university of notre dame moreau fye week two) (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) (“7 clues: an interactive assessment activity ” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau week five) (“the right way to be introspective(yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056?module_item_id=144382 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau integration paper #1 professor retartha moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 uplifting roots from new jersey to notre dame i believe that our relationships are what make our lives full. i believe that our ability to empathize with and respect others gives us humanity and the ability to create real relationships. i believe that i have a responsibility to remind others that they are valued. throughout my first few weeks of college, these root beliefs have helped me to adjust to this new environment and stay true to myself. growing up, i’ve always been super close with my family. from friday night dinners to sunday soccer games to disney family reunions, i’ve always enjoyed spending time with my parents and siblings. as a result, one of my root beliefs is that our relationships are what make our lives full. whenever school stressed me out or i was facing a hard decision, my family was there to help me through it. whenever i needed an ice cream fix or an ear to listen, my friends were always there for me. my relationships with both my family and friends have played a huge role in my happiness. therefore, one of the hardest adjustments coming to college has been being so far away from my family. i call my parents and sisters weekly, but eight weeks is a long time to go without a hug from mom or dad. so, i’ve tried to put myself out there and make new relationships. fortunately, by coming in through the gateway program i’ve entered college with a built in support network and family. like dr. brown says in her tedtalk, “i know that vulnerability is kind of the core of shame, fear, and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it is also the birthplace of worthiness, of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love, and i think i have a problem” ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). due to our common vulnerabilities and fears as members of the 9.0 gateway cohort, everyone in the program has become a quick friend. being in the same boat of not quite making it to notre dame has brought us together. like dr. brown says, our vulnerabilities have led to the creation of much good: strong and supportive friendships. and while i am extremely grateful for all of the friendships i have created through the gateway program, i’ve also tried to expand my horizons and look for meaningful relationships elsewhere on campus. coming to notre dame, i knew that i wanted to join a club sport. i like to stay active, but i struggle to hold myself accountable to run each day or go to the gym. so what better way to stay active than to join a club sport that meets regularly for practice!? on the day of the club fair, the ultimate frisbee club seemed super welcoming and fun. at first i was nervous to go to practice as i knew my frisbee skills were sub-par, but i wanted to work on building one of my lesser skills—bravery. according to the via character strengths survey, while i am competent in “love, fairness, and self-regulation”, i struggle with “bravery” (“via character strengths survey” by via institute on character moreau fye week two). thus, i decided to conquer my fears and give it a go—and i am so happy that i did. this past weekend i went to my first ever ultimate frisbee tournament and had so much fun. i would have never gained that experience or new friends if i didn’t put myself out there. after my experience with joining ultimate frisbee and trying something new for the first time, father pete’s advice from week three really resonated with me: “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr pete mccormick moreau fye week three). navigating new friendships, classes, and hobbies this year has taught me a lot about myself, and i am fully enjoying every minute of it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois this first root belief has definitely helped me to adjust to this new environment, and i find that my second one has too. i believe that our ability to empathize with and respect others gives us humanity. additionally, it is through both empathy and respect that we can build authentic relationships. on move-in day, i met a lot of new people. as i worked to make friends, move-in day gave me the opportunity to reflect on what qualities define a good, stable relationship. one way we can develop these authentic relationships is through respect. we can do so by giving those around us our full, undivided attention. like olivia taylor says, “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). in an authentic relationship, we care about what our friends have to say. by giving our peers the attention they deserve, we show them that we respect them and what they have to say. other ways we show respect are by sticking to plans and refraining from spreading rumors. in addition to respect, i believe that an authentic relationship requires an aspect of empathy. we can do this by listening to each others’ stories and trying to put ourselves in the shoes of others. everyone comes from a different background and in a new environment such as college, we need to empathize with each other’s stories so that we can best support each other. empathy is especially important in relationships where people don’t share extremely similar backgrounds. “it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure” (“how to think about implicit bias” by keith paybe, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week seven). i know that i owe it to my friends, peers, and everyone else to listen to each other’s stories instead of judging each other based on stereotypes. we are all unique and different; this is what makes a relationship so fun! i https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ have found a great friend in my roommate, and i believe that at the root of this newfound friendship, i can find these values of respect and empathy. finally, my third root belief is that i have a responsibility to remind others that they are valued and worthy. when arriving in new environments, we sometimes struggle to adapt. it can be disheartening and make it easy to forget your worth. as a friend, i feel that it is my duty to remind everyone that they are worthy and wonderful people. i’ve noticed, especially with gateways worried about making the 3.5 gpa, that a major source of feeling unworthy is grades. i always try to remind them that grades don’t define you. as father grove says, “our lives are not our resumes” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr kevin grove moreau fye week five). it’s ok to mess up. we don’t have to be perfect. this is something i myself am also trying to work on. when you pour your heart and soul into working to obtain a certain grade, it can be upsetting when you miss the mark, but i am trying to learn that one assessment does not demonstrate my full potential or knowledge. george ella says, “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). it’s important to remember that we are all unique and different, and that’s what makes us special. we each contribute something to this world that no one else can, and i believe that that makes us worthy. our unique stories make us valuable people to this world and one bad test score, one mistake, won’t change that. i’ve always lived with these root beliefs, but i don’t think i ever really recognized them or put the ideas into words until the moreau first year experience course. as i’ve adapted to this new environment, i am grateful for how these root beliefs have helped me to assimilate and i hope that i can rely on them to help me conquer any new challenges i face in the future. i am https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html excited to see how these root beliefs change over the next four years and to discover which new root beliefs form. yusman_integration one yusman 1 professor wagner moreau fye 14 oct. 2021 who i am, what i’ve learned, and where i’m going i believe that i am searching for ways to be vulnerable. for many, vulnerability is a default or a release when they feel safe. brené brown said that “when [she] asks people about love, they tell [her] about heartbreak. when [she] asks people about belonging, they’ll tell [her] about being excluded.”1 however, i’ve found that i tend to act contrary to this. the first day of classes, when asked what i liked so far at notre dame, i felt compelled to find good, even though in reality i blacked out and got a concussion and there was relatively little to be joyous about. i try to hide my vulnerabilities so that i may focus on helping other’s. when asked how my day was, i quickly answer “decent” and seek the truth of the other’s day instead. however, i know this is not a healthy reaction. just as much as other’s need the time and ability to be vulnerable, so too do i. my own experiences at home, and in sharing my vulnerabilities in moreau, have taught me this and show its value to me. they’re driven me to become more vulnerable, speaking openly if things aren’t going great, and allowing other’s to truly see who i am. by continuing this and fostering relationships with those who i’m vulnerable to, i hope to further this search and come closer to others and myself through it. i believe that my purpose is to help others. david brooks proposes the idea of an “adam 1” and “adam 2” in which the first represents our reasoning and logic while the second represents our emotions2, and that they exist in a conflict to each other. i would argue instead that they are in conflict when one is not living as their true self. i find the joy and happiness of yusman 2 helping others to be more rewarding than anything else. in addition, from a logical standpoint i know that helping others brings the greatest benefit to humanity as a whole. in this way, through finding my purpose i’m able to reconcile the beliefs of adam 1 and 2, using them both to accomplish my purpose rather than managing a disagreement between the two. my knowledge of this purpose has existed for a while, but was furthered by moreau’s investigation of my personality traits. although a test prone to error, my results did reflect the traits i generally consider most important to helping others, and as such the traits i work on the most. however, it also showed me my weaknesses and where i might improve. by improving in these, i may give myself more resources with which to work towards my purpose. as such, i’ve started trying to acknowledge and even seek out situations that may grow and improve my less developed character traits. i believe that i grow through pursuit of my faith. if there is one thing i’ve learned from moreau and notre dame so far, it’s the value of faith in my life and the active pursuit of it. professor fagerberg, in his article for the grotto3, speaks of faith as a kind of light that one uses to view the world. in this i fully agree. faith, and the pursuit of it, has shown me so much more about myself and the world around me that i would not have known otherwise. it has helped me find see my purpose, see the beauty in the world around me, and better understand those around me. in moreau, i learned about the role of faith in other’s lives, and how they each pursue it. with this information i can seek to better my own practices, finding ways of practicing my faith that fit me and my lifestyle. one such way is visits to the grotto. i’ve found it to be an amazing place to reflect not only on my day-to-day life, but my faith as well. through methods like this and other’s, i hope to continue to develop and grow my faith so that it may guide me on my journey. yusman 3 i believe that i forge life-giving relationships through a love for others. love, to will the good for someone else, is an inherit trait in everyone. every human seeks to love and to be loved. not necessarily in any specific form, either romantic or platonic, but simply to have those who will their good and who's good they may will in return. one of the greatest examples of this i’ve learned of at notre dame is fr. sorin. he journeyed to a land new to him and suffered many struggles in order to construct the university of notre dame. in this he showed greatly his love for those who would come to attend the university, wishing for it to do good to them so that they may be a force for good in the world, or alternatively phrased, for it to show them love so that they may love the world. this pursuit of love gave him a life and happiness known to few others. he wrote that even though his interests were in other places, that he would be met with no sadness to run the university and ensure its success. this is the kind of life giving relationship that i pursue, and i hope to find it similarly through a love for those around me and those to come after me. now, it is important as well to specify the boundaries of this love. love, as i stated earlier, must be a will for other’s good, and cannot become a selfish pursuit. as seen in the video by the one love foundation4, this happens all too often. love becomes an excuse for bad rather than a pursuit for good. this is what i must seek to avoid in my pursuit of life-giving relationships. by staying aware of my own actions and what they really say about the intent of my love, i identify if i am ever nearing this line and work back towards love for good rather than drifting into a selfish love that can do so much damage to others. i believe that i find truth through identifying other’s pursuits and perspectives. carla harris, a laetare medal recipient, said that she learned to “help anyone, anyway, anyhow, just because you can.”5 i believe to be true, but how does one go about that? how does one know what is needed to help others? if the help could cause harm instead? just as chimamanda ngozi yusman 4 observes that the likely well-meaning european books cause harm to african heritage6, so too can well-meaning help be a detriment to some. moreau has taught me to approach others with this mindset. one wishing to help others as best i can, but while keeping in mind their own pursuits and perspectives so that i do not accidentally cause harm where good was intended. one way i can seek to grow in this aspect is through asking questions of others. by learning more about those around me and those of completely different walks of life, i can better understand others and equip myself with the knowledge to do the most good. i believe that my community should foster my growth. george ella lyon believes that everyone should look at where they’re from and the things that have made them who they are7. to this i would add to look at the present, and see those who will make me the best person i can be. moreau showed me how to identify those influences in my past that have shaped me and made me who i am, and from that i can understand myself in the present. using this knowledge, then i may look at those around me and how they will affect me in the future. who to hold close and take opinions from, and who to keep in touch with but avoid them shaping my life. in this way i can ensure i grow to be the best i can be so that i may do the most for those around me. yusman 5 works cited 1. “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one 2. “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two 3. “faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three 4. “because i love you” by one love foundation moreau fye week four 5. “notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five 6. “the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi moreau fye week seven 7. “where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html i’m so sorry! i will get it to you by sunday integration 1 thigpen moreau fye 10/15/21 new home under the dome i always hear the older kids talking about moreau like it’s some chore. i think it is the perfect example of the “you get out what you put in” sort of analogy. i’ve carefully reflected over my time at the university of notre dame and realized how much my perspective has either been changed or enhanced by my first year experiences. i believe i grow by building friendships. the first week here was especially hard for me because i didn't have a network of friends to rely on. “i had a breakdown but my therapist called it a spiritual awakening”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i have always been a social person and through highschool i learned to maximize my social skills. i feel like i had a great experience coming out of my shell in high school. i was elected to the student council and spent all 4 years participating in school events and it forced me to be uncomfortable by meeting new people. following the first week, it was still kind of hard to meet new people but i believe it was significantly easier because i already went through a relatable experience in high school. i mainly love meeting new people because every single person is slightly different. i think it’s enjoyable to compare people's personalities to those i have already met. not only that but it's almost even more exciting to meet someone who's completely different from anyone you've ever met. i know that i am seeking out those with strong character. as discussed in week 2, i believe that building the adam 2 side of yourself can be just as beneficial as building your academic knowledge. college is generally thought of as a place of building quantitative knowledge but i believe that character building is just as important. “you had to leave friends and family in order to build these relationships at notre dame”(“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week two). father pete said exactly what i was thinking. it was really tough the first couple days, i missed my family and my friends because it seemed like everything was so easy in highschool. the articles from week 3 talked about the meaning of perspective. i think this new college environment is the new perspective i needed to find god. the fact that i was all by myself meant i had the ability to make my own decisions and decide who i wanted to be without the pressure of my parents. since the first week, i've formed close relationships with my ra’s as well as my hall rector, fr bob. i try to go to my hall mass as often as i can but it’s hard with the busy schedule of being a part of the men's swim team. i love the feeling of being in the hall mass. everyone is about the same age going through roughly the same experiences together and i believe it really amplifies the feeling of community within the residence hall and makes it feel less like a regular college dorm. when i build these new relationships, i believe i am searching for those who hold me to a higher standard. this aspect of my personality has been brought to the forefront through our last few weeks of training. when i’m in the pool, i take every chance i get to prove that i belong here and have a legitimate place on this team. it isn't always easy but i try my best to be a leader even as a freshman. i give it my all on every effort and i expect my teammates to do the same. i expect them to call me out on my shortcomings and i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry respect them for that. i fight for every swim that we do because i remember something my old coach said to me. as long as you have a lane, you have a chance. i truly think of my teammates as a blessing to me because i know they want me to be the best version of myself. “we are blessed so we may be a blessing to others” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” spoken by fr. kevin grove c.s.c. moreau fye week five). i feel like the week 5 discussion encapsulates the idea of holding each other accountable while pursuing excellence. part of the process of meeting new people is understanding and listening to their beliefs. i came to this university far from home with hopes to expand my knowledge of world views. i feel like this area of my experience is well expressed in week 4 and 7 regarding genuine relationships and shaping complex opinions. ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). earlier we talked about the importance of cutting out toxic relationships, ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four) but i feel like i still haven’t come across that issue here at notre dame. everyone here is very understanding and come here for the same purpose of being exposed to new ways of thinking. since i’ve been in college, i've been trying to meet people who have different viewpoints. it has been nice getting out of my hometown and broadening my experiences. already i've met people from different countries who speak different languages who i never would have had the chance to meet if i went to a different college. i’m proud to say i am still long distance dating the girl from university of arkansas that i mentioned in my qqc. it’s been a whole new type of change in its own aspect which has taught me how to communicate better and express how i really feel. it's especially hard that everyone else gets to go home over fall break while the team has to stay here and train. the next time i will get to see her is thanksgiving break and i really can’t wait for it to come. over the past 9 weeks i’ve been immersed in an entirely new environment and i have learned how to bond and recognize character, build my faith as well as my community within the swim team and my dorm, and i’ve learned the importance of honest communication as well as listening to others opinions. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story focus question: "in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?" 1. i have found the focus question, ‘in what way do stories shape my journey?’ for the week sept 20-24 particularly intriguing. personally, stories have helped formulate the person i am today. learning and hearing the stories of others has been a catalyst in my own personal growth, whether that be from a grandparent, a friend, or a stranger. i hold the belief that you can learn something new from every single person you meet, and through this belief, i have gained invaluable perspectives and insights into matters i believed i fully understood. at notre dame, i look forward to meeting people from all around the globe, so i can hear their stories and grow as a person. 2. question: what steps should someone take to allow themselves to be more vunerable? quote: ‘connection is why we’re here. its what gives purpose and meaning to our lives’ this line particularly stood out to me, as i think more than ever in the past year, this point has been stressed. through zoom and facetime, we were able to connect throughout the pandemic, but these are not sufficient substitutes for face-to-face human interaction. the ability to communicate and listen to others is undeniably important, and this quote gives me hope for the future, as personally for a while during lockdown i felt starved of authentic human interactions like many others. as an outgoing person this was tough, as it was difficult to truly ‘connect’ to anyone other than my family. i firmly agree with dr brown here, as for myself, connecting with others is a huge part of my life. comment: i found dr brown’s ted talk particularly enlightening in a number of ways. the way in which she presents vulnerability as something which is essential to grow and prosper as a person is striking, the quote, ‘you are imperfect, you are wired for struggle. but you are worthy of love and belonging’, particularly resonated with me as it reaffirms the point that no one is perfect, and that is perfectly fine. i found the fluidity in her speech fantastic, and the over-arching message that we have to break down our walls and allow ourselves to be free in our expression of our feelings and emotions is truly transformative. larkin david lassen moreau fys 30 november 2021 looking back and looking ahead this first semester of college i have encountered many new challenges and opportunities. i have admittedly absorbed a few blows, but i have also done my best to take them in stride. i have reconsidered many aspects of my worldview, both based on experiences i have had and based on materials i have read in my classes. one aspect of existence i have enjoyed analyzing and questioning are different philosophies and ways of looking at morality. my sense of what is right and wrong has been challenged from numerous sources already. i have been exposed to much more of the world than i previously had been, both in controlled academic settings and in social ones. in my seminar, we have read adam smith’s the theory of moral sentiments, and machiavelli’s the prince (in addition to several other books). machiavelli presented a very interesting opportunity to dive deep into a philosophy which i strongly disagree with. i have found that it is always beneficial to read things with an open mind, and that it is possible to do so without making yourself too vulnerable to persuasion. as such, i was able to consider machiavelli’s assertion that honesty should only be exercised when it does not place the person at a disadvantage and take it with a grain of salt, maintaining my belief in the importance of honesty, particularly in situations where it would be disadvantageous to tell the truth. similarly, in moreau we read an excerpt from a fictional work by c.s. lewis, portraying satan discussing his strategy of temptation with one of his demons. at one point, satan asserts that “to decide what the best use of [human undulation] is, you must ask what the enemy wants to make of it, then do the opposite.” (the screwtape letters chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i found this to be an interesting way of looking at things, and an unconventional one. typically, it would seem more logical to form enemies based on opposing views and beliefs, but in this circumstance, satan’s views and beliefs are based on his status as the enemy of god. we do occasionally see this in politics. although the american system of government is generally brilliant, one of its downfalls is the rise of the two-party system. as a result of this system, we have reached a point where political views are often formed not based on personal beliefs, but rather on either aligning with a certain party or opposing another party. reflecting on new ideas and applying them to modern phenomena has been one of the more enriching aspects of my academic experience thus far. another valuable reflection has been on the aspects of community. this has admittedly been one more or less forced on me by the moreau modules, but it has been fruitful nonetheless. one of our readings claims that “contrary to popular opinion, community requires leadership, and it requires more leadership, not less, than bureaucracies,” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this is an interesting but valuable take on community, as communities are traditionally thought of as small, agreeable, cohesive, tight knit groups of people that require no formal organization or structure. however, achieving this is nearly impossible and would likely require said community to be a small intensely homogenous population, otherwise conflict will inevitably arise with no protocol with which to regulate and resolve it. additionally, a community without any leadership has no direction, as it will have difficulty ever establishing any singular goals to work towards. furthermore, any hope of achieving a goal requires creating a detailed plan in order to reach both the end goal and the checkpoints along the way. community functions, whether they be regarding conflict resolution, collective direction, or any other number of situations that will inevitably arise within any group of individuals, require leadership in order to be addressed efficiently and effectively. this is why the united states does not hold a nationwide vote on every bill, and also why congress is currently in gridlock, unable to reach any mutually agreeable conclusion on seemingly every relevant issue. another important aspect of a community is its makeup, and this has been a struggle everywhere in america for as long as it has existed. racial disparity still cannot be ignored today, even though many would like to think that racism and racial advantage ended with martin luther king jr. and the civil rights act. unfortunately, race is an issue we must still reckon with, and it is critical that we all take it as an individual responsibility to ease this pain. we can start by being conscious of the way we carry ourselves, both outwardly and inwardly. a reading that discusses whether or not to teach critical race theory in catholic schools states that “it [‘it’ being the principle that all people are made in god’s image and likeness] places on us the moral obligation to consider every person as our brother or sister, our sibling or neighbor, regardless of social constructs such as race. therefore, it approaches racial differences similarly to those who prefer that we emphasize our common humanity,” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week 10). while this certainly sounds nice, and can be advantageous in very basic social interactions, it can be an extremely dangerous and unhelpful mindset to have when looking at any major racial issue. this practice is often referred to as being ‘color-blind,’ with the idea being that refusing to see color allows one to treat each person equally. while equality is wonderful, a ‘color-blind’ solution will not fix a ‘color-aware’ problem like the ones we face. the challenges facing us are ones that are the product of past decisions that were based specifically and intentionally on race, making it incredibly difficult to deduce solutions that do not account for race. furthermore, this mindset often leads to people ignoring the problem, as the problem only exists if we consider race. although it is extremely difficult for those of us that benefit from the system, it is imperative that we reckon with the flaws and injustices within it. it may be hypothetically possible, but it seems pretty unlikely that a government designed by slave owners was built to be equitable to people of all backgrounds. this is not to completely discredit their design, as they brilliantly created a system that was racially biased but had numerous mechanisms built in that were capable of correcting its flaws. the founding fathers were very aware that they could not account for every future issue that might arise, and therefore gave the different branches of government the ability to correct themselves and each other at their own discretion and constitutional obligation. a significant problem today is that while we have eliminated aspects of government that specifically and actively discriminate against one group of people, we have not made significant steps to ease the pain caused by historical injustices. additionally, it is impossible for a government to control every aspect of its population to ensure total equality. the people need to regulate themselves, and this comes through education. after the civil war, the daughters of the confederacy brilliantly set out to write history textbooks that would paint the south and its leaders in a kinder light, in order to forever skew the view of this history. it worked extremely well, and the effects of this continue to persist into the 21st century, with textbooks written as recently as 2010 claiming that robert e. lee was opposed to slavery and racism and only fought for the confederacy out of loyalty to his (and my) home state, virginia (this is blatantly false: while he was not a fervent proponent of slavery, he owned slaves and was a well-documented white supremacist). still today, a shocking number of americans believe the civil war was not about slavery. these actions prove the value of education, and speak volumes to the potential benefits of teaching critical race theory. it will foster an environment in which the next generation will not only be more motivated to change their own government, but will be generally more focused on equity in their daily lives. overall, it has been beneficial to consider the different aspects of community and how i can better mine at notre dame and beyond. lastly, i believe the most important consideration has been that of my own goals and priorities. college is nothing if not a period of nonstop self-discovery. our week 9 reading told us “instead of asking, ‘what should i do?’ or ‘what would my friend/parent/significant other expect me to do?’, ask yourself, ‘what do i want to do?’ and ‘what do i think is best?’,” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan lcpc moreau fye week 9). this has been a huge priority as of late, as i attempt to discover what i am both passionate about and gifted at to discern my major. it has been difficult to part from the expectations of others and instead consider only my own, but i have certainly made some progress. i have faith in my own judgment, so i know i will eventually come to the best decision for me. my first semester of college has been an extremely important period in my life, and i believe the following years will be equally if not more formative. my experiences in the classroom and outside of it have certainly helped me to gain perspective and reevaluate my values and my plan for the future. mike comuniello moreau first year experience 12.3.2021 seeking growth in discomfort the months i’ve spent at notre dame have, in some ways, been some of the most challenging that i have faced in years. moving away from home to a new environment where i know nobody, faced with challenging classes on top of trying to be independent for the first time feels overwhelming at times. i’ve done poorly on tests and made a fool of myself in front of friends and strangers. i’ve faced loss and had arguments that have put a strain on my emotional state. through these challenges, i feel like i’ve undergone more growth in the last few months than i have in the last year or longer. by reflecting on these experiences and being equipped to think more critically through my moreau assignments, i’ve prepared myself to reach new goals. from these assignments, i’ve realized that i have encountered social and academic challenges that have forced me to reevaluate the way that i learn. moving away from my comfortable life at home into a diverse place like notre dame was challenging. for one, it felt like a complete reset of parts of my social life that i had previously solidified. for example, when i was a hormonal freshman in high school, i was especially susceptible to fomo (fear of missing out). i hadn’t planted my roots and gained the confidence that for one, i’m probably not missing out on as much fun as it would appear on social media and two, the fact that i wasn’t invited was not out of malice or any ill will, and was more likely just circumstantial. as i grew as a person and found my people, these feelings dissipated to the point where i was unbothered by not being invited to something and was content to stay in sometimes as opposed to dragging myself out when i didn’t feel like it. since i’ve arrived at notre dame, where i’ve been uprooted from the comfortable social environment that i built for myself, the feeling of fomo has returned. as i reflected in week 9, “i can't help but feel like some of my friends at other schools have more fun when i see them out on a weeknight or at huge parties.” beyond feeling like my social life had reset in some ways, i also entered completely uncharted territory. in week 10, i discussed the lack of diversity of my hometown and how “we should educate our youth for when they step out into more diverse communities unlike our own, just as i’ve had the opportunity to do by coming to a community like notre dame.” in my first few weeks as a notre dame student, i encountered an experience that has helped educate me and allow me to grow more accustomed to a more diverse community. i met an indian girl with a name i had never heard of before and, without even thinking, asked something along the lines of, “where does your name come from,” though i believe i worded it more oddly. the question drew the attention of a few people in the room because it sounded insensitive or oblivious, which made me feel like an idiot. she laughed and explained that it was her grandmother’s name and took no offense to my question and lack of proper wording, and from the encounter i became more aware of other cultures and more comfortable with dialogue. i’ve had academic challenges as well, though. an experience that captivates both my challenges and solutions came after my first calculus midterm. math always came easy to me in high school, so when i received a con a major test, i was shocked; never had i done so poorly on an exam before. i was sad and confused and felt like i couldn’t keep up here if i was already doing poorly, but when i learned that a friend did equally poorly, my nerves were settled a bit. since then we’ve helped each other and studied for the subsequent exams with improving results. by allowing myself to be supported by others, i’ve learned that i cannot face every situation by myself. i believe that parker j. palmer’s words in week 11 perfectly summarize my perspective when he said, “when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). admitting failure was difficult for me, but the comfort in knowing that i was not alone and the fact that i had to seek help from my peers was valuable. from the challenges that i have experienced during my first semester at notre dame, i have better learned how to learn. the discomfort and entering uncharted waters from these experiences has not only been a catalyst for personal growth, but i’ve better prepared myself to grow from future experiences. as reverend james b. king writes in week 12’s “holy cross and christian education,” personal growth and the ability to learn require commitment: the educational process itself requires a particular type of dying to self. whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place. the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. (holy cross and christian education by reverend james b. king moreau fye week 12) being at notre dame has given me the opportunity to shake up the foundations of what i know and present opportunities to learn from unique experiences. from what i’ve learned in class, i have realized the importance of making a concerted effort to benefit from these experiences through contemplation and discomfort. i will work to be more comfortable with discomfort and try to better understand what makes me uncomfortable in said situations to uncover what drives my growth. week 13-integration-irons irons 1 jacob irons professor whittington moreau first year experince 3 december 2021 sleep, friends, and new ideas my first semester in college this past semester has been one of encountering new challenges and adapting to college life. when you go to college, you understand that life will change and you will face tough challenges; however, nothing will prepare you for the transformation college will bring in such a short time. it’s your first time away from your home, parents, and bubble. when these safeguards are finally removed from someone’s life, the entire world they know changes and even where they call home. one of the most significant changes i have encountered in college has been changing my sleep schedule. throughout all of my life, i have gone to bed early and rose early in the morning. as many know, college does not follow these guidelines as it’s a late riser and late-night type of atmosphere. i never got on this trend in high school. i was never afraid to call it a night before 10 o’clock, and i had no problem arising from my slumber before the sun was ever visible. my friends would always make fun of me and joke saying i was an 80-year-old man. however, college is just structured later in all regards. classes start at eight o’clock, clubs begin at seven or nine o’clock, and dorms are honestly never quiet until midnight; students are forced into this box with all these factors. coming to college, this was not an obstacle i never intended to face; nevertheless, you have to adapt. many people cry, whine, and ask why it can not stay the same when coming to college. this was not my approach; i responded with the understanding that complaining would irons 2 do me no good and that you should just adjust and move on. if you do not modify, you will be left in the wings looking on. i changed my sleep schedule to better fit my new way of life. another obstacle i faced entering college was creating bonds and friendships. i never really had a problem with this is in high school. although i went to a catholic grammar school until high school, i was still never forced into creating new friendships. i played every sport our town offered soccer, basketball, and baseball, allowing me to build friendships on the court or field rather than in the classroom. nonetheless, when i entered high school, it did take time to create these friendships. however, nothing would have prepared me to come to college. as stated above, many understand that you will meet new friends; however, you are starting from scratch, there is nothing to fall back on. the first week i described myself as having a lot of acquaintances, not a whole lot of friends. it was a lonely time. there are all these people around you; however, you never really feel close to them. i understand you can not just think that friends will happen at the snap of the fingers. you start to wonder whether it is you because everyone around you is laughing and creating these close bonds. emery bergmann states it perfectly in her article, “loneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self-criticism” (advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau week nine). as my loneliness increased, i started to turn on myself and thought that i was the common denominator on why everyone had friends and why i did not. although you are prepped, it will be tough to create these bonds; no one will ever prepare you that first week where you are on an island thinking it is yourself. it often got to the point where you were wondering whether notre dame was the place for me. was this school just so far from what i had already known in high school that i had made a wrong decision to attend the university of notre dame. however, my parents have always told https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html irons 3 me that fleeing a difficult problem is good for you but makes you feel worse about the situation. father king states it perfectly, “we need to have hope in that process to stick with it” (hopeholy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau week twelve). this is precisely what i needed to do; stick with it and not lose hope. so often, i would just lose hope and throughout all my other options. however, after that first week, i stopped sitting back and wondering why this was happening and tried to change what i could. first, i opened my door to the dorm. this allowed me to have small conversations with everyone when they walked by my dorm, creating these short bonds. then i started asking people to go to the dining hall with me instead of going alone. these minor changes are how i responded to my loneliness. now i can say that i have been afforded some great friends since that first week. another experience i have been encountered since attending the university of notre dame has been meeting many different people from various backgrounds. i grew up in the quiet corner of connecticut, which did not have much diversity or other disverified experiences. everyone in my region of connecticut had relatively the same ideals. since coming here, i have been exposed to a variety of different beliefs. it took time to fully understand where they were coming from. in my short time on campus, i go back to a quote from parker palmer, “receptivity involves inner work” (thirteen ways of looking at community by palker palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau week eleven). i had to do a workshop on myself to set myself up to become receptive to all these different ideas. i hope this has allowed me to become a better member of the campus community. often people that have contradicting beliefs do not talk peacefully with each other. they will yell and scream and make comments that will leave everyone involved hurt. when https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414?module_item_id=106246 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414?module_item_id=106246 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ irons 4 encountering people of different views, it is vital to remember a quote from kintsugi pottery, “hearts are breakable” (finding healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto moreau week ten). people lose sight that what is said in fights will leave people hurt and heartbroken. this is why being receptive is so important. you need to work on yourself to ensure that you do not break others’ hearts when you are involved in these tough conversations. i have ensured that when involved in tough conversation i understand that hearts are breakable. college is a location of firsts and you encounter many different obstacles. it is not just being faced with new obstacles but it is how you respond to these challenges without your safeguards around you. for me it was adjusting to a new sleep schedule, making new friends and working on myself to become more receptive. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ integration 2 1 dec 3, 2021 prof. bryan reaume integration 2 learn through hope we all know that we can tap an inner well of power by being conscious of our reactions. it can’t hurt us if we don’t let it. sometimes, we need to stand our ground, brace ourselves and let the negative emotions crash into us. we know that we honestly can’t appreciate the sunshine without weathering the storm. whatever we become out of life is not defined by the good feelings we desire but by what bad feelings we’re responsible and able to sustain to reach us to those good feelings. when i started my college application, i was so vulnerable to people’s opinions that i hardly realized the value of joy. but the same vulnerability was my source of joy when i got accepted to the university of notre dame. it reminded me that i think vulnerability is a characteristic that god makes us strong and learns from our mistakes. when i realized that god had gifted his blessings upon me and gave me the power of uniqueness, i started to feel happy and cheerful. as a result, i could use positivity in my life. being our authentic self is what we all are looking 2 for and what god wants every one of us to seek. this is where self-worth grows when you try to accept your vulnerability, and i learned it from my own life. i consider that self-worth doesn’t depend on the endorsement of others. awaiting someone to measure your accomplishment is not a way to live your life. this is a stressful and depressing way to live. according to elizabeth cox in ted-talk, “none of us is complete. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we will disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox, moreau fye week nine) rather than letting your personality be governed by the expectations of others or your expectation that you have to be accurate, you do your best. i learned this lesson in a difficult way. my life took an exciting turn at the university of notre dame when i heard of a competition in notre dame called “mr. nd,” where males from every residential building fight to be the best. i decided to put my name to that. but the fear of failure, also known as imposter syndrome, was always stopping me from dreaming big. the insecurity that i could not get the title held me back. someone told me that all the previous winners were whites and rich. but since i am not in any of the categories, i do not have any chance. i was very close to putting my name off the list. but my inner self was telling me that something bigger was going to happen! then i heard that i got selected to represent keough hall in the mr. nd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo 3 competition. my courage started to build up. however, since i was fighting against all other dorms, i was anxious and fearful. this feeling became worse when i realized that voters had to vote for me and donate my name. it seems like an impossible task for me because, first of all, i did not come from a wealthy family. second, i am a freshman asking someone to vote was out of my comfort zone. i was asking myself, “what should i do?” or “what would my friend/parents expect me to do?” and got discouraged. then i scheduled a meeting with my rector about this psychological pain. he suggested that i rethink the type of question i ask myself, “what do i want to do?” and “what do i think is best?” he advised me to trust myself. he said, “don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to.” his words of wisdom empowered me to get out of my comfort zone. i launched a successful campaign, and eventually, i won the most exclusive title for a male dorm to have, the title of mr. nd! looking back, the sixteen-hour days for the campaign in the early stages were well worth it. life is not always an easy road, and i know it’s essential to plan, work hard and see our goals to achieve success. however, it is not too easy to get away from our problem. we sometimes get sad and depressed. but we often forget that it is normal for feelings of sadness or grief, and it helps to develop in response to such situations. according to kirsten 4 helgeson, who helped many women to get through their pain through a japanese art kintsugi, “everybody who walks away with this greater connection to who they are that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto,” moreau fye week ten) it made me realize that we are not unbreakable. it is ok to get sad and mad. we have to accept the way we are. mr. nd competition taught me this lesson. i may not be wealthy, but i am confident and versatile, and, most importantly, unique. i have realized that obstacles are part of survival. our uniqueness will guide us through the process, and we will get to know our inner self. we all deal with individual enigmas, families have family issues, and communities have community obstacles. communities must come together to solve their obstacles, just like families. i learned that lesson from a fulbright point of view after meeting with my rector mr. gabe. he taught me that the difference between acknowledging a problem and finding its root cause is similar to a doctor prescribing the indications of a disease and curing the disease. once a condition is understood well enough to improve, it is often understood well enough to prevent or eliminate. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ 5 similarly, once we know the root causes of a community problem, we may be able not only to solve it but to secure systems or policies that prevent its return. according to parker j. palmer, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven). i learned the value of community after coming to notre dame. when i need help with anything, i go to my rector, mr. gabe, who always helps me out with it. indeed, i can say that notre dame is where i can call home. we all know that life is complicated. there are many obstacles on the path with inevitable twists & turns, and just having goals is not enough. a brief introduction to the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis said it clearly: “life is suffering.” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis, moreau fye week twelve). life is meant to be challenging, and living requires consistent work and review. by default, life is difficult because we must strive to earn happiness and success. hope allows people to approach problems with a positive mindset suitable to success, thereby increasing their chances of accomplishing their goals. hope always helped me out in any situation i needed help with. when i came to the campus, i was so anxious about coping with the new community. but after a while, i got to know them and felt at home. home is not just where you live. it is where good memories http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 6 are born with those people that will always help you out no matter what circumstance you are in. notre dame gave me the home where i feel confident and can learn and thrive. we often face our destiny on the path he takes to dodge it. when i started my college application, i never thought i would ever get into notre dame, but now it feels like destiny. we are all intended to do great things; we must defeat whatever holds us back and more toward that largeness. we are too concerned with what occurred and what will be. there is a famous saying that yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that is why it is called the present. there is no charge for awesomeness or attractiveness. we all are fantastic in every way. we have to nourish this feeling and have to be happy. week 13 integration 2 jessica geriane week 13 integration 2 this new chapter of my life has just begun, but it has been an incredible journey full of highs and lows that have brought me much personal development and insight about my life and purpose. in just this first semester, i have undergone many life-changing experiences and created endless lifelong memories and friendships that i will cherish forever. the atmosphere at notre dame facilitates self-improvement and the potential to do something greater than yourself, and the campus unity is unlike any other. as a member of the swim team, i have the amazing opportunity to join other athletes under common goals and have created bonds that unite us not only as teammates, but also as a family. this year, the swim team had a rocky start, and it has been a continuous struggle due to many unforeseen circumstances ever since. despite these situations, we continue to support each other and lift each other up in the darkest of times, and from this i have learned that in order to grow personally, i must embrace not only the good times but also the moments where rock bottom seems to be inescapable. from the moment i first stepped on campus, i felt so many emotions. of course, i was extremely thrilled to be able to attend a school this prestigious, but at the same time, i was very anxious and nervous for what was to come. i felt as if i did not belong or was worthy to go to school here because i entered the university not as a regular student, but as a student-athlete. i questioned myself constantly, not knowing that there was a term for these feelings of self doubt: impostor syndrome. i was so caught up in my own feelings that i did not realize that impostor syndrome “is something that most people can find themselves to be not alone in” (“what is impostor syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). from learning more about https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102798 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102798 impostor syndrome, i was able to understand that everyone holds themselves to standards that, much of the time, are quite unattainable, and i believe that it would be very beneficial for everyone to know that they are not alone. the swim team is one of the greatest support systems i have ever encountered, and to know that everyone feels the same way as an athlete guarantees that these feelings are normal. having friends that i share a common interest with makes me feel less alone and doubtful about the future and helps me feel more comfortable in this new atmosphere. another special thing about the swim team here at notre dame is that everyone comes from different backgrounds, locations, and social situations. at times, we let these and other differences alienate us from each other, however, i have discovered that “it is through our differences and fighting conflict that unites us together or as a community” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). to get rid of these disconnections, one must remember that resourcefulness and unity bring hope and trust that leads to group determination for success. these differences make us who we are and what makes the entire team so unique. seeing that each of my teammates’ have different personalities and characters made me feel comfortable in my own skin on and off the pool deck. practicing everyday with this special group of people made me realize that we are not so different after all. we are all working to the best of our abilities and training to reach the same goals: achieving success in the pool and in the classroom, and i have come to the conclusion that every person on this team is imperative to those successes. as i previously mentioned, this season for the swimming and diving team has been full of struggles and challenges. there have been many conflicts between classes, training groups, and teammates in general. as a freshman, this all is quite nerve racking for me, as i am generally https://couragerenewal.org/wpccr/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://couragerenewal.org/wpccr/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ afraid of the upperclassmen and feel as if i do not have much of a voice as someone who has only been on campus for less than four months. as father jenkins’ stated in his 2012 commencement address to the wesley theological seminary, “hatred poisons everything” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins moreau fye week ten). jenkins notes that hatred is the thing that can destroy the greatest of bonds and relationships; he calls it the “great divider.” hatred is persistent and not only affects yourself, but the people around you. it is something that should not be common, but unfortunately it is something that has always been around and is impossible to completely get rid of. it is clear to see that we must recognize that hate comes from within, and we must engage with one another in ways that we can better understand each other and learn others’ positions and why they are taking them. despite some conflict within the team and the nerves and uneasiness i sometimes feel throughout the school week, it is difficult to forget that the team culture, the school’s emphasis on catholicism, and the impeccable traditions of this university are what i came to notre dame for. i have begun to see that this sport unites my teammates and me, and that gives me hope. hope, as defined by notre dame’s campus ministry, is “trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). this exemplifies the thought that all individuals should place their trust in god in order to hope for a greater future. by trusting in the cross, we place all our worries in him, allowing us to focus on the betterment of ourselves and the following of christ in the ways that he wishes us to. in a similar way, as a member of the swim team and other sports teams in the past, seeing my teammates work hard during strenuous workouts and then watching them achieve their goals not only makes me extremely happy for them, but it also gives me hope in https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ what i strive to achieve. the energy that my teammates express everyday at practice or at meets helps me feel more motivated and gives me the ability to hope that my goals will be achieved and that i will be able to feel that satisfaction of all the hard work that has been put in towards reaching the best end. even though i have not been at notre dame for a very long time, i am eternally grateful for what the team and the school has done for me so far. joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 24 november 2021 my first semester at notre dame: a learning experience reflecting back on this semester, i realized that i learned more about myself than i ever thought i would. some of the questions i’ve asked myself this semester were, “what truly matters to me? how will i somehow make a difference and fix the injustices that i witness around me? how do i achieve that sense of belonging in a new environment?” since i was at such a prestigious institution, i felt so pressured to excel in everything in order to fit in. however, the more i tried, things never truly went the way i wanted them to, which caused me to feel strong feelings of imposter syndrome. it was possibly caused by these high expectations i had for myself that caused me to feel as though “i wasn’t good enough. (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogganmoreau fye week 9). the more i failed, the more i questioned whether or not i really belonged here or whether it was a mistake. (moreau fye reflection commentary week 9). after beating myself up for such a long time, and going through such a hopeless time in my life, i came to terms that grades aren’t as important as i thought they were. in high school, all i wanted to do was excel in everything i did, and i became disappointed that i wasn’t performing to the same standard as before. however, what’s truly important is that i learn and develop my character because that is what the college experience is all about. even though i’ve experienced many failures throughout this semester, i realized that i had to experience that in order to become a better version of myself. i can’t always dwell on the fact that i didn’t do well on this quiz or exam, but i can learn from that negative experience and change the way i approach the situation. like in the kintsugi video, broken pieces of pottery were put together with gold. as a result, something more beautiful was produced than the original. ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grottomoreau fye week 10). in a similar way, i realized that we are all somehow broken. in my moreau class, while listening to other people’s stories, it gave me a sense of relief that i wasn’t the only one who felt that way. whether it was our past experiences or our mindset on life, we all know that sometimes life isn’t fair and that nothing could ever be “perfect.” as a result, we may turn to means of hatred to satisfy the brokenness and feel more complete. however, i believe that we all have a responsibility to approach every situation from a love perspective. in a world that is mostly full of hate, it’s important to not fall victim to our emotions alone. father jenkins said, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider.” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by father jenkinsmoreau fye week 10). personally, when i’m having a bad day, i tend to have feelings of hatred towards myself because i thought i didn’t do enough. however, i know that i shouldn’t hate myself or anyone else because i deserve to feel loved especially in times of distress. realizing that truth is the first step to piecing together our brokenness. even though notre dame is a great institution with many resources, there are still some flawed areas that i noticed the longer i stayed here. as an asian at this institution, i do believe that this institution is making an effort to accommodate the different needs of the student body. however, when it comes to matters such as cultural food or publicization of other minority groups, notre dame needs to consider that the idea of diversity should definitely become more normalized especially at such a predominately white institution. in diversity matters, professor augustin fuentes stated, “race and inequality matter but they are not fixed.” (diversity matters by professor augustin fuentesmoreau fye reflection week 11. not only can this be applied to notre dame, but also in the society we live in where inequality has become prevalent. on that note, respect is the first step to becoming more of a cohesive community. sometimes, it’s also good to know that having that sense of community doesn’t always mean being close to one another, but it just means respecting each other’s identities and backgrounds. it’s important to note that community should be viewed as a gift because it’s not something that’s always attainable. (“thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmermoreau fye reflection week 11). i certainly agree with this because i’ve felt that i was a part of something bigger than myself by being here. whether it is within my dorm community or even just in my weekly moreau class, i can tell that everyone cares for each other’s well-being. during welcome weekend, when father jenkins gave the student body a speech about the main principles of notre dame, i never realized how important it would become in my time here. moreau overcame many challenges in order to found the congregation of holy cross. coming here and leaving the familiarity of home, i realized that i didn’t have a sense of home. personally, i think that’s why i relate to the principles of zeal and family the most. zeal allows us to overcome fear and sacrifice our preferences for the needs of our brothers and sisters when mere human logic fails and we find ourselves compelled to follow the truer impulses of our hearts.” (“hope holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. kingmoreau fye week 12). i think that i need to apply zeal more often because i sometimes get too caught up in my work and i forget about what’s important which is forming those lifetime connections that help with strengthening the bonds of a family. in other words, logic and intelligence can only take you so far in life. you also need to follow your instincts and what you feel is right in the situation. (moreau reflection commentary week 12). the semester that i spent at notre dame has been a valuable experience because i learned more about myself and about others. i learned that being at notre dame came with many responsibilities but also a better sense of character and community. reflecting back, i am grateful for the gift of notre dame because i realized that i am part of a community that will “be a force of good in the world.” “week 13integration” webb 1 prof. polotto moreau se. 83 3 december 2021 the formation of a loving human being through self-identification in this semester, i have encountered many experiences, many of which were not easy; however, i have learned that that is okay, because i can use all of my experiences as a chance to grow. i have had to ask myself many questions this semester such as– “are my actions bringing me to be my best self?”, “what can i do to make myself happy?”, and “who am i as a person? who do i serve?”. now many of these questions were in fact brought about by my struggles to find and build a community at notre dame, which proves that even the bad can be fruitful to growth, especially the bad. throughout this semester, i have learned to serve myself in a manner that is both fruitful to myself and to others, whether that be through dance company or in my own dorm. when i am my best self, i feed both my own soul and the energy of the community around me. learning how to focus on my own wants and needs first, and knowing how to increase my own happiness decreases feelings of hatred which could be projected onto the world around me through my daily interactions. and my joyous feelings have been and are continually being projected onto those around me, and especially those who may share hateful sentiments towards me, a problem i have encountered within my dorm. however, despite my wanting to spread positivity around me, i find myself asking what happened to the girl where positivity came so easily, and how have i been transforming throughout this semester? was my joy and positivity before naive, whereas now it holds more meaning? webb 2 this semester, i have had struggles with self-identification from both within and the surrounding world. internally, i am struggling to differentiate myself from the person i am now and the life that i live now in comparison to before college. there are many aspects of myself that i feel more secure in now including my independence and decisions; however, i am often extremely doubtful of my moods and mindsets. with so many adjustments in college, nothing in my life has been consistent except inconsistency, and i find myself battling to come to terms with that. despite feeling much more independent after leaving my toxic “friends”, moments of loneliness come, and i find myself seeking for the acceptance of those who would never has=d looked out for me, and it is difficult to come to terms with this realization and to resist the urge to give myself “ultimatums in order to be accepted by others” (“why letting go of expectations enables you to live a better life” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). however, i have learned to follow my desires and not expectations of what i should do, and just trust myself in my choices, relationships, and paths. i believe that the search for my independence and my identity is what will lead me to become a great factor within my community in my dorm and dance company. my own recognition of the right and wrongdoings of others, and experiencing these happenings grants me the courage to act and to call for change in my community, especially in my dorm. i must change my own view that the other will act first when dissonance exists, and calmly approach the issue. my relationships with others are not clear cut, most of them lie somewhere in the acquaintance range, some in close proximity, and others in disdain; however, what is clear is my attitude towards all relationships– kindness. to “love is the greatest commandment” (“wesley theological seminary commencement | office of the president | university of notre dame” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten), because even love can overcome the effects https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ webb 3 of hatred. i cannot “reduce anyone else’s hatred” (“wesley theological seminary commencement | office of the president | university of notre dame” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten) or their feelings towards me, but what i can do is continue to grow into my best self and spread love everywhere i go, and maybe that will change their hearts. in fact, i am more beautiful for letting my love for others overpower my hatred from past experiences. and this is one way that my actions are leading me to grow into my best self. this semester, i have greatly struggled with my community. however, i recognize that all of humanity is “embedded in community” (“thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven), and this is why i continually fight for a community and put my efforts into it. i may not love everyone in a community; however, a community will always be a source of support for me when i fall down, because i need them to lift me up, especially now where i have to cut many of my old ties that are preventing me from growing. and i can only have this community once i open up my heart to it. i have found this community at dance company, and many of my closest friends are from here. i know that because i opened up to them first, they will come to me. once i begin to serve others and upon up my own heart to them, can i grow into love. i must be accepting of a community, accepting of receiving it instead of forcing it, which is something that i have learned in many of my experiences. i wait with patience now whereas i acted in desperation before, knowing that god’s love will come to me if i have trust in him. i have had many experiences solely in my first semester, and my reactions may not have always been the best, especially when i faced dissonance in my dorm community. however, i am learning to respond in a manner that both grows my spirit, and points to god's wishes. in other words, i am rebuilding the relationships around me and showing every single person love https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ webb 4 no matter my experience with them. despite my mistakes, the sole fact of my efforts is enough to please god, because no matter how much we mess up, i can still please god just by the act of trying., by continuing to spread kindness and this gives me hope. my responses to the world around me drive me towards reformation and completeness as i strive to live as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“hopeholy cross and chrsitian education” by fr. james b. king c.s.c.moreau fye week twelve). i can respond to the hatred in this world by bringing about hope through my own cross, through the little sacrifices that i make and can make daily, like giving up my free time to help a friend and to spread joy even when i am exhausted. my cross leads me to live in a christ-like manner and gives me fulfillment. my first semester here at notre dame has taught me selfmotivated thought and independence. i am choosing my actions for myself in a manner that advanzes my community. although self-service and serving a community may seem a little contradictory, the two are simultaneous. i cannot fill up other’s cups if mine is empty. and by serving others, i fulfill myself, and by putting my needs and self-discovery first, i can more authentically serve my community. i am still learning my purpose here, but i have hope that my experiences here will lead me to fulfillment, even if it requires some reformation of thought and being on my behalf. i am still unsure of who i am transforming into, but i am confident that i am the driving force behind it and not others’ and their expectations. i will no longer let the expectations of others dictate my life. i will continually participate in god’s love, and my identity, community, outlook, and actions will change because of it. taylor kelly moreau fye: integration two 3 december 2021 brokenness and dissonance = problems with solutions starting college is such an interesting point in a person’s life. it is the time in which a person leaves his or her hometown, family, and friends to embark on a completely new journey. i, along with thousands of other freshmen comprising the university of notre dame class of 2025, have traveled quite a distance from home to come to college knowing no one. despite the uprooting and major life changes, it is a very exciting time, and is also necessary for personal growth and development. although college has been enjoyable thus far, there have been some challenges. throughout my notre dame journey so far, i have become aware of the growing importance of strength of personal character, confidence, and independence. although everything around me is new, it is helpful when i know that i have a strong foundation. despite this, dissonance is still bound to happen at times. loneliness is often experienced by college students, but especially by college freshmen. i experienced loneliness in the beginning of the school year. i was doing activities, such as walking to class or eating a meal, that i would always do with the company of friends or family by myself. we can respond to the dissonance and loneliness we may experience as college freshmen by establishing a sense of community. in her new york times article, emery bergmann says, “but by putting myself out there, i found so many communities on campus to invest myself in, and where i knew i would be happily received (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). one way to do this is by taking advantage of on campus activities. we can also break out of our shells and meet new people from many different backgrounds. as proven not only by the example of beginning college but rather many experiences in life, community is extremely important. however, as stated in “thirteen ways of looking at community”, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received,” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this reminds us that, though it is important to get out there and join communities to meet people, we have to stay true to our likes and dislikes when choosing which communities to join. community is also a remedy for imposter syndrome. when people keep to themselves, thoughts can run wild. these thoughts could possibly include those of imposter syndrome. however, when we share our experiences with others, we realize that other people are going through similar circumstances. in the video entitled “what is imposter syndrome”, the speaker defines a phenomenon called pluralistic ignorance, which occurs when people doubt their abilities, talents, and accomplishments but keep these doubts to themselves and feel as if they are the only ones who feel this way (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). however, if we spoke freely about our feelings and insecurities within our trusted communities, we would all benefit. from reading about these topics as well as discussing them in class, i now know that, when facing any sort of dissonance, including loneliness or imposter syndrome, i will not struggle quietly, but instead open myself up to community. as i am finishing up my first semester, i am thinking about which communities i want to join. i tried to join a handful of clubs in the beginning of this semester, but nothing really stuck. i am especially looking for ways to become involved in music, since playing the piano has been a large part of my life, and i feel myself missing the musical experiences i had in high school, especially instrumental ensemble and the pit orchestra for the musical. another obstacle experienced in life is brokenness. although people can face this at all stages of life, it becomes more common as we get older. a cheerful second grader is not fully aware of the brokenness occurring in the world including but certainly not limited to heartbreak, exclusion, and racism. as we go through more life experiences, we see more examples of brokenness. when we go to college, we meet people from all different cities, states, and countries. there will be few other situations where you will meet more people from all different areas in the same place. this is a great thing. however, these people not only bring and share happy experiences, but also experiences pertaining to brokenness. i really like the “with voices true” initiative by the klau center archive on race because it gives individuals opportunities to share both the good experiences as well as the challenges they have faced regarding race (“with voices true snapshot summary by the klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). not only do we witness an increasing amount of brokenness as we get older, but we ourselves may experience brokenness firsthand. in the last year, i experienced brokenness when a faculty member at my high school died suddenly. we all loved her and went to her to casually chat whenever there was an issue and thought of her as the “school mom”. she was also the mom of a girl in the grade below me. because of the small size of my school, we are a tight-knit community. though the loss was harder because of our close community, our sense of community was a main factor in helping us to heal. in the kintsugi workshop video, we see women who have experiences of brokenness heal through repairing pottery with gold paint. the leader of the workshop, kristen helgeson, shares the importance of healing not only through kintsugi workshop, but through understanding and accepting the fact that a person’s heart is breakable, and that that is okay. she says, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together,” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). women experiencing kintsugi are comforted by hopethe hope that things will get betteras well as the community of the other women surrounding them. feelings such as brokenness and dissonance are inevitable. we will all face situations like that throughout our lives. however, we can have hope in god. as the phrase “ave crux spes unica” translates to “the cross our only hope”, we must rely on god to carry us through these troubling times of dissonance and brokenness. we should count ourselves as lucky in that we can go directly to god when facing challenging times instead of having to figure everything out on our own. as fr. james b. king writes, “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus,” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week 12). as a notre dame gateway student, i am often reminded by the catholic influences around campus that i am never alone in my journey, and that i can always look to hope, community, and the cross as solutions to dissonance and brokenness. lonergan 4 professor helm moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 finding myself i believe that this semester i have grown into a more confident version of myself, and i’ve gained more clarity as to how i can better myself. in the summer, i kept checking my acceptance letter to notre dame, thinking that admissions was going to pull my admittance at any given time. it wasn’t enough that i was acceptedi thought that there just had to be some sort of catch. i wouldn’t let myself simply be happy with the fact that i had achieved an insane goal and milestone in my life because i was insecure in my abilities. i have always struggled with perfectionism, and whenever i feel as if i have achieved a goal, there typically appears to be something holding me back from celebrating. with perfectionism follows the idea that i have neverand will neverreach the end goal. the bar continuously gets higher as my confidence gets lower. as i got to campus, this only increased, with my imposter syndrome soaring through the roof. julia hogan emphasized this idea by stating, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves). but i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i think that as soon as i actually got here and realized that at this point admissions wasn’t able to state that they had made a mistake with my admittance, my new focus was on the intelligence of my peers. my mindset was that even if admissions had made a mistake, now here i was with people who were way smarter than i was. i felt overwhelmed, out of place, and anxious. however, now i realize that that is not the case. in setting reasonable expectations for myself and actually realizing that everyone is in the same boat, i’ve been able to become more confident in myself on campus. in naming the problem (and realizing that the problem was me, not others’ abilities), i grew into a much stronger student who is more confident and willing to speak up in class, share my ideas, and know that my thoughts are valid. i believe that i’ve learned the power of addressing hate and the power of spreading love. in class, we discussed some powerful and heavy topics in relation to inclusion on campus. one of my small groups even talked about the exclusion and negative stereotypes we have on campus in regards to students at st. mary’s. however, we noted that there is no reason for this hate, as it only weighs all of us down as a university, and promotes negative ideals that notre dame does not stand for. this idea was emphasized by fr. john jenkins as he stated, “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action. hatred poisons everything” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins mfye week ten). notre dame needs the students at st. mary’s and the students at holy cross because together we are stronger. in pointing out that hatred is here, we can then create positive change because we are addressing the issue. hatred is within us all, but we cannot be tempted by that evil because it affects our abilities to unite as a community. this concept was mirrored in week twelve as the text stated, “our war aim is a world in which our father below has drawn all other beings into himself: the enemy wants a world full of beings united to him but still distinct” (“the screwtape letters chapter 8” by c.s. lewis mfye week twelve). here, god is referenced as the ‘enemy’ because we tend to see him as such. we push him away and give into the danger of hatred that stems from ‘our father below’ (the devil). however, in having faith and hope, we can limit this hatred within ourselves and our communities. i have definitely deepened my faith while at notre dame, and not only has this created a more positive relationship with myself, but also within the relationships i have with others. hatred is poisonous, but if we all continue to have faith in god and within ourselves, we can stop the spread of hatred and become united as a society. i believe that communityespecially in my hallhas become more important to me. when i first came to notre dame, the dorm system kind of threw me off. it was so much different than other colleges, and, after hearing what my friends’ experiences were like in their colleges, i almost felt envious of their ‘more normal’ dorm life. however, i have come to realize how much i love the dorm system on campus. while at first (especially during welcome weekend) the dorm system seemed like a lot, there is no better community on campus than the hall communities. as stated in week eleven, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer mfye week eleven). my dorm community cannot be explained better than that: a gift. the girls in my hall and on my floor have become some of my closest friends, simply because of all the time we spend together and how vulnerable we are with each other. in welcoming one another with open arms and seeing each other as a gift, there’s been such an inclusive community created, one that feels like home. it sounds cliché, but it’s something that you almost need to experience first hand to understand. for example, one day i was having such a tough day. i walked down to my friends’ room and they could just tell that something was wrong. i had tears on my cheeks, bags under my eyes, and slouched shoulders. my friends made me my favorite coffee, had me sit on their bed and rant, and gave me the biggest hug. in being accepted for the mess that i was in that moment, i realized how lucky i was to be able to be a part of such a loving community. notre dame has taught me the value of community simply through my living arrangement. integration paper what am i made for? what am i made of? archimedes’ questions are one that i have been thinking about since coming here. i wrote about not knowing what i want to be from week one, and in all honesty, it feels as if i just wrote that first qqc a week ago (week 1). every time i walk the paths at notre dame, always walking somewhere, always leaving something behind, i ponder these questions. the question “what am i made of?” makes me think of the paths i’ve walked to get here. like what i wrote in the poem, i think of my hometown, and the people who helped me get to where i am (week 6). as you wrote in some of your comments, what makes me me, is the intersection of all of the people i’ve met in my life. i honestly did always think of this fact about myself as a negative component. i thought that for me to truly be myself, i had to do everything completely alone with no help or influence from others. whenever i would find myself mimicking/resembling something that someone else had already done i got mad at myself because i did not believe it was truly my own. this fear was put into a technical term in week 9 when we learned about imposter syndrome from the video (week 9). it was comforting to know that it was not just me who thinks in this way, and the comment on the qqc that week put into perspective how as long as i stay true to who i am, it is not necessarily a bad thing, collecting different parts of my personality from others (sandberg, week 9). over these past couple of months i’ve realized that there are so many people in the world, that while everyone is completely unique, we are all extremely similar in many ways. after this epiphany i no longer feel as bad when i find myself resembling someone else because in reality, i still make it my own. this does not mean that i seek to only follow others, as i previously thought, it is me realizing that others have a better grasp of life than me, and taking notes from them improves my own individuality too, as long as i put my own spin on it. one other thing that makes me unique, which i have recently discovered about myself, is somewhat hard to describe. i believe myself to be an introvert turned extrovert, and still have a heavy mix of both qualities, which heavily impact my daily life which was furthered by the survey results from week 2. many of my results were mixed proving i have many different sides to my personality(week 2). i value alone time very much. at home there were always lulls when there’d be nothing going on and i would be able to just relax, now that i am fully in charge of my own day, i always make sure to weave in time when i can be by myself for a while each day. this gives me time to reflect on what i want to do, but another thing is that i tend to never stop thinking. when i am by myself the extrovert in me is oftentimes suffering from fear of missing out, yet i want the alone time as well. luckily being a mix of both types of personalities does have some benefits, i find i am able to adapt to both kinds of people in many situations that i would not really be able to do if i were solely one or the other. basically i’ve learned that one of the unique qualities about myself is that i am adaptable to most kinds of people and situations, however because i am both i am also always slightly on edge in certain situations as well. the pros of this fact i believe outweigh that one con. one more thing that i’ve realized about myself, is that i truly do love to serve. i’ve done multiple clubs and activities. i tried out a large amount of them at the beginning and ended up sticking with a choice few. three things kept me coming back to them. of course i have to semi enjoy the activity the club does, however this ended up being the least important aspect. second was the people that were in the club, as i’ve come to appreciate how much i enjoy spending time with the ones i am close with. the third thing, which is a somewhat new discovery of myself, is that i felt most alive when i felt as if i was making a difference in someone else’s life. this is something that i always knew was a part of my life, but i only recently discovered is what i was made for. i am made to use my life to make the lives around me better, in any way i can. i am at my purest core, a man made for others. through my engineering class i believe i have found at least a career path that could be something i was made for. one that makes infrastructure that will make others lives better and more convenient. but this school, even only one semester, has taught me i am made for so much more than just a career. i am made to enjoy the little moments, small things that make others’ days just a little bit better. i am made to spend as much time with my friends as possible, and to continually expand my idea of who i am friends with. each day proves to me that i am on the right path. the people i am surrounded with here only strengthen my drive to serve others. i’ve learned about my fascination with the beauty of humans in general, and the intricate relationships between everything and everyone. and lastly i know i am made to live in a way which pleases god. elena que maria finan moreau fye 3 december 2021 new community, new challenges since coming to notre dame, i’ve encountered all sorts of new experiences that have significantly affected my personal growth. from staying up until 3am studying for a chemistry test, to attending daily mass, to listening to taylor swift’s new album at midnight with my friends, i’ve grown spiritually, academically, and socially. although i came to college knowing that i wouldn’t leave as the same person, i already feel like i’ve been shaped by my experiences here. in the past three months, i have encountered both a new community and new challenges, bringing new perspectives that have deepened my understanding of myself and the world around me. my college journey, however, is just beginning, and i know i will continue to make new discoveries in the years to come. there is little doubt that the past few months have brought me reeling face to face with a brand-new community. from acquaintances to close friends, professors to mentors, roommates to sisters, my relationships with others are ever changing and growing stronger. this is an essential part of my personal journey, for as parker j. palmer notes in ‘thirteen ways of looking at community,’ “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). as a fairly introverted person, i never loved to interact with many people outside of my close social circle, but i’ve learned that in a community, people serve many different purposes and it’s not always about being as close as possible to every person. some people are meant to be close friends, some are meant to be simply classmates, and some are http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ meant to be a friendly wave in passing. particularly after going from living with just my parents in a two story house to suddenly living with hundreds of strangers, i felt the impact of that new community. i can confidently say, however, that the dorm community has been nothing but positive. my closest friends now live just down the hall from me, and i find myself being able to turn to them at any time of day (or night). whether this means asking for help on a math problem or needing advice about something personal, i have never felt more supported. while there are still plenty of people in my hall that i have yet to become close to, i’m always looking forward to the opportunity to get to know them better, and there’s never a shortage of hall events to give me that chance. outside of the dorm, the community is just as strong. in my classes, everyone is willing to be collaborative and supportive, regardless of how well we know each other. when a test is coming up, or there’s a tough homework assignment, it’s never difficult to find someone will to study or lend a helping hand. although i’m still hesitant at times to reach out to others in fear that they won’t be interested in working together, i’ve learned that that is rarely the case and i’m learning to take initiative in building that community. of course, becoming part of a new community also means becoming more vulnerable to the pressures and expectations of others. sometimes it can be hard to toe the line between fitting in with others while still staying true to my own identity, but julia hogan points out in ‘why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit’ that “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). it takes unique identities to form a functional community, and it’s important to remember that i bring a new perspective and personality to the group that i shouldn’t try to hide. if anything, my exposure to so many new people has given me a firmer grasp of my own https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau beliefs and ideas while also keeping me open minded to the opinions of others. in this way, my new community has helped me more highly value collaboration and honesty. from swaying back and forth to the alma mater after the football games to studying together in the library long after the sun goes down, there are countless moments where i feel the impact of this new community, and i’m eager to continue to grow along with it in the future. on the other hand, the move to notre dame has led me to encounter new challenges as well. particularly in the scope of comparing myself to others as i try and make new friends, there has been a fair share of difficulties. this was especially prevalent in the first month or so, when imposter syndrome strongly affected me. it was so easy to see others as above me and think of myself as inferior, and i often found myself in a negative and unproductive headspace. yet as c.s. lewis wrote in the screwtape letters, “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). one of the best ways to cope with this struggle, i found, was time to myself, and that often meant a trip to the grotto – somewhere i could find peace and get away from the chaos of everyday life. in this way, i was able to turn my struggle into chance to grow closer to god. while i don’t think imposter syndrome has disappeared, it’s significantly decreased in the past few months, and i’m grateful to have overcome that challenge and feel as though i’ve grown stronger because of it. beyond that, i’ve also encountered challenges in balancing my priorities. between classes, homework, clubs, and social opportunities, there have been times where it’s been hard to determine what my top priority should be, and often has felt like there simply aren’t enough hours in the week to get it all done. but as fr. john jenkins points out in the ‘wesley theological seminary commencement address,’ “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186733?module_item_id=103506 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186733?module_item_id=103506 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back” (“wesley theological seminary commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). this drives the point home that life is by no means easy and it takes determination and grit to be fulfilled. and sometimes, that is enough. even if it isn’t always clear if the right decision is to get an extra hour of sleep or spend that time studying, the intention is good. life is chaotic, and there are many forces working against our success, but we do what we can to be successful. this was an important lesson for me to learn, because being successful doesn’t always mean being at the top of every class, but sometimes just means putting in my best effort. and if that means getting extra rest instead of going to a club meeting, then that’s okay. even though there are still times that i have to make sacrifices when organizing my priorities, i’ve found a good balance where i feel fulfilled while still being successful in the various areas of my life. college has not come without challenges, and i know there will be more to come, but i’m equipped to tackle them and prepared to grow along the way. from adjusting to a new community to facing various challenges, the past few months have been nothing short of eventful. but each of these experiences, whether more internal or external, have taught me a valuable lesson and irreversibly changed me, arguably for the better. college is a time of growth and discovery, and i’ve already felt the effects of this. i look fondly on the past few months and feel proud of how i’ve grown, and i look ahead to a bright future full of new opportunities to continue to grow. integration 1 integration 1 10/14/21 my safety net strung from beliefs by i believe that everything happens for a reason. i believe that we grow more together than alone. i believe that we all have a greater purpose in life. i have many beliefs but the simplest of them all is the belief that everything happens for a reason. my decision to attend notre dame, the ups and downs of moving across the country, and some of the hardest losses i've experienced in life. they all happened for a reason. some reasons are quite apparent, like moving across the country has brought me closer with my family. other times i am left searching for the reason, but no matter what, i know it's out there. accepting this idea that you don’t know why something bad might happen, but believing that there is a larger reason is a showing of vulnerability. in week one we spoke of the importance of vulnerability in a healthy lifestyle. vulnerability is important because once we allow ourselves to become more vulnerable to the idea that things are out of our control, we will experience a healthier and more enjoyable life (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown morreau fye week one). another way to inhibit this healthier more enjoyable lifestyle is by growing as our genuine self. i know in my own life, i have grown more and been happier when i decided to be myself versus when i tried to be someone else to impress others. when being my authentic self i have to keep in mind the difference between my resume actions versus my eulogy actions (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks morreau fye week 2). many times i might engage in something not out of enjoyment, but because i know it will look good on a resume. i don’t believe there is anything wrong with this as long as it’s being https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim integration 1 10/14/21 identified. on the other hand, our eulogy actions are those which distinguish our true selves, and those are which i believe inhibit happiness. my next belief is that we grow more together than we do while alone. this is based on the idea that we learn more by being around each other. talking and sharing stories is a great way we learn through others. a great example of this is what father grove says in his moreau talk. he says that as a holy cross priest, he does not just teach, but he also learns. this learning is what is special, and really helps him grow. (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. grove morreau fye week 5). i identify with this idea because i know i learn so much from others in ways i never even expect. oftentimes i find myself learning just by listening and observing my surroundings and the people occupying them. another way i’ve learned through others was during our poetry reading in class. this was an assignment where some of us may have felt out of our comfort zone. i know it was a personal thing to share for me, but i really learned a lot about my peers and myself from it. i like the quote, “i have found a new home, where i can be myself, and live with my peers, who i now view as brothers.” ("where i'm from" by , morreau fye week 6) because it shows just how close i’ve grown with others while here at notre dame. i’ve learned from others of different cultures and creeds while here and that has helped me grow. this also piggybacks off of our week 4 lesson of life giving relationships. in class we discussed the spheres of relationships and how they grow. i have seen many people start as strangers and in the two short months since i’ve been a student at notre dame, they are now my closest friends. the video of “because i love you double whiskey,”somewhat ties into this idea because there isn’t any friend here who i wouldn’t drop anything for to help in a heartbeat("because i love you, double whiskey" by the one love foundation, morreau fye week 4). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1pxb1vwcj3h49p8v_xmrgxuxp2gokjeeto8pbvnitvd4/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g integration 1 10/14/21 my final belief is that we all have a greater purpose in life. this relates to why i believe i am here at notre dame, and why i will continue to work hard to stay here. this deeply relies on my faith. in my core, i believe that god has brought me here to build relationships and do good. i have been brought here for a reason and i will make my parents, grandparents and loved ones proud. fr. pete’s video discusses the framework we have and how it affects us and our story (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick morreau fye week 3). for me, my framework revolves around helping others, and this adds to my story. one thing i learned that doesn't necessarily fit my framework that i feel like i have to work on is implicit biases. i do not like the idea of expressing bias or being biased towards any other person. in my framework i look to treat all with equality and respect. this has brought me to think about the idea of treating others equally though. in the text, how to think about ‘implicit bias’ the idea of implicit bias being a part of all of us is discussed. (how to think about 'implicit bias' by keith payne, morreau fye week 7). it is not something we intentionally do, hence the implicitness, but when addressed we can work on it and work on treating everyone better. since enrolling at notre dame and taking my moreau course, i have developed and grown. being in such an unfamiliar environment, surrounded by unfamiliar people, i had to quickly grow. there were nights where i missed home and stayed up wishing i was sleeping in my own bedroom versus a shared one. there were times where the courses were so difficult, i was not sure if i belonged. nomatter the problem though, i stayed, i kept working, and i grew. i showed up to class every day and i fell back on my beliefs. the most basic and important of them all are the three i listed at the beginning, because those three beliefs are what i turn to in times of need. https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ moreau integration 2 progression of authenticity and self growth in community understanding and embracing being independent is one of the biggest challenges a person faces in life. outside of the mental aspects of independence comes the influences of physical constants. throughout my first semester, there have been many new unexpected adversities that i have faced that have affected my overall character. it has made me reflect on how to not only overcome these adversities but also what questions i should ask myself when i am faced with a challenge. these questions include what are you made for? and what are you made of? i am so grateful for the opportunity to research and be involved in the notre dame community in its mission to keep students adapting to change and in a healthy and positive way. i think it is important to identify self traits first because they have an overall effect on the personality that is portrayed to others. for me, the question ‘what are you made of?’ makes me reflect on how i internally interact with myself. by keeping a positive mindset and being confident in myself it is simpler to believe that i am made of more than just my physical makeup. i feel that i am made of love, compassion, confidence, and even sometimes a little dose of healthy fear. all of these traits revolve around being able to believe in yourself and not allow mistakes to affect every part of your life. i admire julia hogan's ability to explain this to readers in her article why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, hogan states, “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (julia hogan, week 9). embracing imperfection is imperative to breaking the cycle of gravitating towards comfort and staying within a bubble without new experiences. knowing that not everything has to be perfect reveals character traits that exemplify resilience and authenticity which only enhance a person’s ability to overcome challenges and come out stronger. having some healthy fear not only helps me continue to accomplish my goals but it also creates a well-rounded foundation for my life. throughout my life, i have played sports, participated in clubs and events that have shaped who i am. sports were always my outlet where i was able to embrace my passion for living a healthy lifestyle, stay connected to my community, and influence others through leadership. one thing i always noticed in sports was my fear of failure and letting people down. father kevin made an excellent remark in response to this fear of letting people down, he said “shift that fear of letting people down into a category of curiosity”. honestly, i never thought about it in this way until now and i think that this advice will definitely be useful as i continue my academic and social experiences at notre dame. curiousity creates a foundation for a more positive and healthy mindset. throughout sports, i eventually learned how to cope with this fear because i used fear to motivate me and work even harder for myself and my team. this is where having rules for life can help understand exactly what you are made of because they are personal ways in which you can set goals and accomplish them. one of the biggest takeaways from exploring more about having “rules of life” is that they are not concrete but rather open to change because we are in an ever-changing world. my rules of life, while broad, can be implemented into any situation. for example, my first rule is “give things time to develop” and my last rule is “don’t settle” (week 12). these two rules work hand in hand in exemplifying that patience is the key to living by these rules. i truly believe that if you can lead life with love and compassion good things are bound to happen. while there is more that contributes to each person's version of “good”, i think it is important that each individual recognizes that what they are made of is important to embrace what they are made for. being yourself is one of the most important life rules that i try to live by and personally i take time to invest in what and who i am passionate about. whether that be friends, teachers, or even coaches knowing that people feel cared for and wanted has always been a goal of mine. i feel that i am made for actively participating in a community and helping others. the community at notre dame is full of many different people that have come together to share similar experiences regardless of social constructs. i think it is important to recognize that as a community we have all come to notre dame to create our story, part of that story is the community that surrounds us. i think that it is so important in creating an inclusive environment based on experiences. kirsten helgeson is admirable in her action of bringing people together no matter their differences by using a form of artwork to repair the breaks that may be prevalent in people’s lives (kirsten helgeson, week 10). this passion that she shares with others not only helps those who are suffering but in some sense, helgeson is using her passion to create a shared experience for all of these people. personally, i believe that feeling welcome in a community is created through connecting to others. notre dame has done a fantastic job of allowing students to meet new people and emphasizes making new connections everywhere they look. throughout the past few years of my life, i have learned what the difference between actively participating in a community and just being part of a community is. actively participating in a community comes from connection and conversation. having a mindset in which we treat a community as a product rather than a gift that we have been given shows the difference between being part of a community and actively participating in one (week 11). i have a passion for helping others and strive for good change within the community. while this may be uncomfortable at times because there are many different opinions and setbacks that is how one becomes even more involved in a community. as we mentioned at the beginning of the semester part of facing change comes from vulnerability and how willing people are to give themselves to others. the ability to be vulnerable plays an important role in participating in a community and allows for each authentic personality to be cherished and accepted no matter what social norms are in place. i am so grateful for all of the experiences that have come my way in life and i only know that the best is yet to come in regards to future experiences through my career, life, and family. the foundation i have created for myself although it does consist of some bumps in the road (because who doesn't) is stable enough that i am able to divide my focus between myself and others. in reflection, i have come to realize that what truly makes me happy is using my strengths and weaknesses like love, compassion, motivation, and fear to invest in others and initiate change. integration 1: to love is to breathe 10/15/21 to love is to breathe i believe that even though my past does not control me it has certainly taught me growing up in a state where people struggled to have their basic needs met taught me that things need to change, i need to change. if i did not change who or what will. who would change and be better than what was before? my home taught me that people suffer and others quietly look the other way. i could let my birthplace keep me stuck in the past and control my actions, but if i did not learn from the lessons it shared how could i be any different. “i’m from a land exploited for its people and resources… i am from a soul that has seen the world, the good and bad, and thinks all of it is worth saving” (“i am from” by moreau fye week six). those two lines encapsulate my upbringing and how i perceive it. people were forgotten about and exploited, and oftentimes it made the world dark, but even in those dark moments people preserved. it was seeing the awfulness of what was going on in my state but also witnessing the kindness and the acceptance of the people simply living that made it clear i had learned from these events and not be controlled by them. as the class shared their “i am from” poems i realized that this is a common human thing. we are products of our past, but not in the sense that we cannot change, but products as we can learn from those experiences and be better. there was a quote i heard long ago that went something like this, “a lot of times we become the person we needed when we were children.” that has definitely happened even in just these 19 years of my life. this becoming of a person we once needed is more about learning from the lessons our environment showed than trying to fix the pain of our past. it shows that we notice https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1q8ljqlmt_7c7kt_jk7r6w-ktqtidl5xmlanfxiex_rq/edit and we did not forget what we saw. it shows that we have to be the change ourselves or nothing will. i believe that no story can exist by itself “nothing exists in a vacuum,” is what my high school history teacher would tell my class and that statement cannot be truer even when thinking about our own story. my story of course is about me, but it also contains the lives of others i have met through my journey. my story holds my heartbreaks, my laughs, my joyful moments, and everything i have ever experienced, but it also houses my grandmother’s story, my sisters’, my friends back home, my friend’s here, even the small conversation i overheard while walking to class. without the stories of others where would i be, who would i be? there is a danger to the single story, and there is also a danger in a secluded story. “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). if i seculed my story, lock it away, and never share i will never be able to continue it. i will never be able to hear other stories and relate them to my own. i would never be able to show vulnerability and compassion as i wouldn't be able to even show it to myself. if many stories matter that then means my story matter, and it is in my story that also holds the stories of others. “… what you realize is that connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability by brené brown” moreau fye week one). vulnerability allows stories to be shared, and without the direct act of being vulnerable there will always only be a single story. the idea is further elaborated on when looking at one of fr. sorin’s letter sent to bl. basil moreau (“letter to father general moreau by fr. sorin” moreau week five). this letter https://www.ted.com/search?q=the+danger+of+a+single+story https://www.ted.com/search?q=the+danger+of+a+single+story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view highlights that it is in the story of others that we often begin to understand that no story can exist on its own. fr. sorin would have not founded notre dame du lac if it wasn’t for the story of bl. moreau or the people already inhabiting the land that he came to. we would not be at this university if others did not take time to listen to fr. sorin’s story and carry it with them, and now over 150 years later we still carry the story of fr. sorin with us. i believe that a life worth living is one where you live for yourself we often busy our lives trying to strive for goals not set by ourselves. whether that is more money, a degree our parents want us to have, cool tech gadgets, or even people, we often don't stop and think about us. we are the ones living our lives, feeling our emotions, having our ambitions. stories can broaden our horizons, the past can teach us, and love can help us, but if we are not the ones living our lives, what good does all those things do? being your true self is more than just being open to others and sharing your deepest desires. being your true self is caring for your mind and body. it is being vulnerable and letting yourself be human, it’s forgiving yourself when you neglect your needs. being your true self is accepting yourself for who you are without any input from others. “no virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own standpoint. therefore we must be saved by that final form of love, which is forgiveness” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). forgiveness is the goal for living a life for yourself and not for others. we often seek affirmation and forgiveness for our deeds from others, but rarely do we seek them from within ourselves, and it is our own being that has done those actions so it should be our responsibility to forgive ourselves. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim i believe that i am alive to care. the act of caring is the embodiment of all the goodness a human can offer. to truly care for someone at any moment takes compassion, selflessness, love, hope, faith, and many times even forgiveness. caring is the true form of unconditional love; an outward expression of something human language has yet to describe. caring is not just a one way street; as one begins to care for another they are shaped by the act themselves. one learns by caring that they deserve the same done to them and as one continues to care they begin radiating that kindness from within. “their very voices and faces are different from ours; stronger, quieter, happier, more radiant… you tend to think that you are being kind to them when they are really being kind to you” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg” moreau week three). i believe that loving is easy love is often treated as if it's an exhaustive act; that it takes immense effort and emotional energy to perform, and sometimes it does. however, love should not be difficult;“love shouldn't hurt” as the grc says. throughout my life i have battled with that idea in my personal relationships and it has been only recently that i truly understand what it means. love should not be something that takes away from oneself, and yet sometimes we are taught to sacrifice ourselves for love. sometimes you have to compromise in relationships, but sacrificing something of yourself is what makes love painful and oftentimes unhealthy. to love someone is to be at rest, to let out a weary breath in front of someone and feel safe and relaxed. love is caring and attention. “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ taylor” moreau fye week four). to love is to share and engage with another human being. “to love is to breathe” is a statement i found months ago, and it is a statement that i have followed and held close as i have continued my journey. to be capable of it, to be worthy of it, to do the act of it is to simply breathe and that is all one has to do to experience love in all its capacities. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ integration 1 semester 2 10/13/21 belief through faith and being good to others when i was young, i was never in one place. it was always stated to state, country to country, or even just house to house. my family moved a lot, but i saw a lot of different things and different people. every place was different than any other; this came in a variety of ways, but most importantly, people's beliefs differed. although i didn't realize it at the time, i will forever be thankful for living in so many different places because it, along with many other factors, shaped my beliefs i have today. through a tough year of covid and a tragic injury, i was able to grow those beliefs to a deeper meaning as i learned more about the man i truly am every day. i believe i grow by strengthening my faith; i believe i am made to not be anything but a good man to myself and the people around me, and lastly, i believe i forge life-giving relations by being a man of faith and one that is good to others. in weeks one through seven of moreau this year, i have been able to develop these beliefs focusing on at least once a week. in week one, i was able to deepen my belief of not having to be anything but a great man. in the video "the power of vulnerability" by brené brown, brown talks about many things, one of those being worthiness. my whole life, i have played football, and on most of those days, i have played it well. five months ago, i made a bad cut; i tore my mpfl, quad, and dislocated my knee cap. i was devastated. i didn't know who i was without football, and without it, i felt no form of worthiness in the world. with time and help, i found this was not true. brown, when talking about worthiness, says that if you had a sense of worthiness, that alone separates you from the rest of the people who do not have a strong sense of worthiness ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). i had to find a way to feel worthy again, but it was a lot simpler than i thought. i was not worthy of anything because i was a star football player, not even a little. i am worthy because of the way i treat others, the man i am every day, and because i am a child of the highest. in week two, i dug more into my belief of constantly growing by strengthening my faith. i have always grown up in the faith, but i am now trying to take my faith to the next level. i have a saying that i like to say on the field that can either keep you humble or lift your spirit. the statement is, "i'm a child of the king." this goes for all aspects of life; when you are at an all-time high, remind yourself you're not the king, you’re a child of the king, and when you feel unworthy, remember you always are because you are a child of the king. in the survey i took, it says one of my strengths is spirituality, and i agree. i am always striving to grow my faith so i can grow as a person (via adult survey moreau fye week two). in week three, we talked about how faith forms the way we see the world. i think my faith changes the way i see everything. in the video "the role of faith in our story" by fr. pete mccormick, i was taught to be patient. this hit home, especially with all of my moves and my injury. it helped me realize that not everything happens overnight, but you need to trust. overall through father pete's words, i can see that my world is shaped by my faith. the basis on how i perceive things starts with my faith (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormickhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois moreau fye week 3. i believe we are all here for a reason and were put here by the same god. if that was not the case in my mind, everything would be different. my faith branches off in the world as well. faith is what gives me trust in my loved ones and why i always know things will work out to be just fine. at the end of the day, faith doesn't physically help me "see" the world, but it sure does help me perceive and understand it. for these reasons, i am always striving to grow my faith. in week four, i focused on my belief in how i form life-giving relationships by leading with faith and being a good person. i loved this quote in the healthy vs. unhealthy handout "partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other's opinions, friends, and interests. they listen to each other...partners share their dreams, fears, and concerns with each other. they tell each other how they feel and share important information ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaignmoreau fye week four)." with my relationships, i try to let my faith lead the way, faith that god has led me the right way, and faith in them. as well as that, i just always try to be nice and caring. in week five, i focused on writing my own story, and it strengthened my belief that i am not meant to be anything but a good person. a quote from the 2021 laetare medalist address stood out to me, it says, "in high school, a counselor told you not to apply to ivy league schools because they were too competitive, but you transformed that limitation into motivation to graduate magna laude from harvard university and later from harvard business school ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harrismoreau fye week five)." this hit close to me, so many people have doubted or told me i couldn't be where i am. i say be gone with people who tell you you can't because it's never true. you really can; you can do anything you work for. now i am in a different place. i feel as if there is not as much doubt as there is expectation. people expect me to be a great player, expect me to do things others can, but at the end of the day, the expectation for myself is not that. i would love to make those plays, and i will work for that every day, but if it all doesn't happen, the real expectation for me is to treat others with respect and love. in week six, i wrote a poem about what has formed me, this poem was inspired from one previously written ("where i'm from" by george ella lyonmoreau week six). i believe that my faith has formed me heavily. in the poem, i say, "i am from my mom telling me to say my prayers." i said this because it was kind of the start of it all. she would tell me to say my prayers every night, and i still try to to this day. this grew me every day, and it still continues to grow me. in week seven, we were asked the question, how can we pursue the truth? i once again fell back on my faith; i always believe i grow by strengthening my faith. but beyond my faith, a quote stood out to me, "there are perceptual illusions, for example, in which white subjects perceive black faces as angrier than white faces with the same expression. race can bias people to see harmless objects as weapons when they are in the hands of black men and to dislike abstract images that are paired with black faces(“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” bykeith payne, laura niemi, john m. dorismoreau fye week 7)." this quote made me realize how https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ people may discriminate without even knowing. with my faith, i believe that finding the truth and treating people the right way are at the core of my beliefs. moreau integration #2 pdf professor pruitt moreau fye integration #2 3 december 2021 learning to keep moving ahead when i got into notre dame i was at work being a hostess at the very restaurant and job i had written about for my college essay. getting into notre dame surrounded by my coworkers, family visiting me, and even random strangers looking on was a very happy day and probably one of the happiest days of my parents’ lives. however, as overjoyed as i was to get into notre dame, i didn’t decide to attend until 6 months later. i had been raised on notre dame. my parents both went to college and met here. growing up consisted of visiting south bend once a year for football games. the only college sports team i knew for a while was the irish. after hearing about how amazing this place is from all my family members throughout my entire childhood, i had very high expectations when eventually choosing to come here. now, having experienced it for myself, i realize there are both many joys and challenges to college. as i continue to make notre dame my home, i hope to remember what i have encountered this semester and how i have learned from my first experiences here. when getting to college, i think the first thing people tend to encounter is other people. new relationships begin fast and grow quickly the first couple weeks of freshman year. i have been very lucky so far to have found friends i really get along with. especially at notre dame, you also get a strong community. whether in a club, sports team, often in the dorm, or even around the whole campus notre dame has a sense of community wherever you find yourself. in week eleven of moreau, we discussed encountering communities and the importance of everyone feeling welcomed and uplifted. we watched a video about why diversity matters in which professor agustin fuentes says, “exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). notre dame is not the most diverse college in the world, yet still i feel very lucky to be at a place where i get to meet people from all over the country and all over the world. at home nearly all my friends were from north carolina. here, i have friends from seattle, new york, chicago, and even tokyo. i find it so exciting to meet people with backgrounds different from mine but find similarities between our personalities or shared interests. as exciting as it is to meet so many new, fun people at college, the transition also comes with loneliness. back at home, my friends were so important to me. we had known each other for a while and grown close after many shared memories. i dearly miss my old high school friends but it’s not the same since they are busy and far away. i love my new college friends but the relationships are different because they don’t know everything about me the way my hometown friends and family do. in week nine of moreau we investigated how to deal with both external and internal dissonance. we watched a video and read an article about emery bergmann — creator of a viral video about the struggles of college freshman year. throughout the article she gives advice to her past self and other college freshmen. sharing her thoughts on the nature of loneliness she says, “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). intimate relationships are something i really value in my life and going to college and being away from home for the first time by yourself makes that hard. however i’ve had to remember that isn’t fair to yourself to spend your energy missing people at home or worrying that college isn’t perfect just yet. something that continues to surprise me is how close you can get to people in such a short amount of time. i have only known my fellow notre dame students for a few months and i already can’t imagine my life here without some of my friends. now, i walk into my friends dorm without knocking and eat the majority of my meals with them. as i continue to meet people and grow closer to my new friends, i hope to respond by remembering that however uncertain you may feel at times, i have been very lucky already and it is an exciting thing to get to meet new people. i have never really loved is change. in first grade i moved from downtown chicago to the suburbs. seven years later right before eighth grade i moved across the country from illinois to charlotte, north carolina. both times i moved i was resentful and worried about leaving everything behind and all the aspects of my life that were about to change. however, both times, soon enough after arriving i was already so grateful for all the new experiences and people i encountered, i just couldn’t see the positive side initially. this is a lesson i continue to learn. i was so excited for college — the interesting classes, the new people, the freedom — but at the same time i was devastated to leave my friends, my dog, my family, my bed, and the list goes on. i don’t think people talk enough about the ups and downs of the transition to college. i don’t mean to complain because overall i have had a relatively smooth time. i have good grades, good friends, a good roommate situation, and i do well living on my own. however most people romanticize the college experience so much that the low points can feel overwhelming, and almost off putting — this is supposed to be the best four years of your life right? simply put, what truly helps me keep everything in perspective is remembering that it’s normal. in week twelve of moreau we read an excerpt from the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis in which a senior demon gives insight to a lesser demon on the nature of humans in order to better corrupt them. by reading between the lines of these letters you can see lewis’s own perspective on the human experience. within the letter, the demon says of a human, “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty” (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i think this quote really gives a nice perspective to life by reminds us that ups and downs are normal. although certain things can be hard especially at college — never being alone, not being able to see my family, and so much work you feel like it will never get done — it is natural to feel stressed and sad and overwhelmed. in a sense, it is a beautiful thing to be able to experience the entire range of emotion. change is an inevitable part of life, as are changing emotions. this leads me to my next point and the final lesson i have encountered at college — realizing the goal isn’t to be happy all the time. in week ten of moreau one of the pieces of content was a video from artist kirsten helgeson who specializizes in kintsugi — a form of healing pottery in which items are broken and paved back together with gold. in the video, kirsten says about those doing the pottery workshop, “they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto moreau fye week ten). i really enjoyed the message of kintsugi because i think it symbolizes this lesson that i am continuously reminded of — the point of life isn’t to be happy all the time. college can feel like there’s a million things you need to do. on top of classes and social life, figuring out how to live on your own and with your own schedule is responsibility enough not to mention extracurriculars. after putting so much pressure on myself academically the first month, i realized all too quickly it is easy to get burnt out and feel discouraged and overwhelmed. i used to have this mindset that i if i could solve all my problems and minimize stress and negativity and pain, i would be completely satisfied in life. i think it is very natural for us to want to never be sad and avoid heartbreak at all costs, but it truly isn’t a realistic goal or accurate picture of human life. as i move forward at college, it helps me to remember that self worth doesn’t come from achievement or productivity and that stress and sadness are normal. in conclusion, college has been amazing and hard at the same time. i’ve met so many amazing people that have already taught me so much but i’ve also felt a different kind of loneliness than i ever have. to handle all this i’ve had to remember that intimate relationships take time, and so does figuring out how to live on your own and what schedule works best for you. the most important thing i’ve learned as i’ve encountered various challenges in my first semester at college is to put things in perspective. by taking things one day at a time, being kind to myself, and responding by simply learning to continue moving ahead my life has become more balanced and happier. integration one believing in deeper connections when i started thinking about what i truly believe in, it ultimately came down to just a few root beliefs that i truly and strongly believe in. i have thought about these beliefs for a long time, even before i got to notre dame and was challenged to think more deeply about my beliefs both in moreau and my philosophy class. these beliefs stood up to the philosophical arguments in my philosophy class, and related very well to the content we discussed in this class. i believe that it is necessary for a good life to have deep and meaningful connections. as brené brown stated, “connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). when i first listened to this talk, i was happy to hear this quote because it aligned very closely with my own belief. i think i developed this belief first through my family. i believe we develop most of our beliefs through our experiences and how we are raised. as we discussed in week six, where we are from has a huge impact on who we are (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i have four older siblings, and i am very close with my family. i think that these kinds of close connections help give meaning to our lives. having people that care for you, and rely on you for some sort of moral support, help give us a reason to be here. this moreau class helped me learn how vulnerability can help with developing these connections, which is something that i have been working on since we first learned about it in week one. part of the reason i chose notre dame is because i heard about the close community that is developed through residential life. personally, i have found this to be completely true. i am in o’neill family hall, and i have really found a family there. when i arrived on campus the upperclassmen immediately welcomed me into the community, and i also connected with the other freshmen in my section. we do many events together, such as “fives” which is where we all https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html go eat dinner together as a section at five o’clock. this has been very helpful for me, because family dinners are something that i love and miss from home. i am a mechanical engineering major, and the upperclassmen engineering majors in my section have been there for me to offer advice and guidance. i already feel as though i am making these deep connections here at notre dame that i believe are absolutely necessary for a good life. “the best kind of friendships are the ones that you leave with a smile on your face” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). these are the kind of relationships that i am forming here which makes me feel very fortunate. the importance i place on forming connections drives many of my actions and behavior. many times when i am trying to decide on what to do in a certain situation, i think about what will result in the most meaningful connection. if given the option between doing something with a group of friends or studying for a test, most of the time i choose the activity with friends. while grades are important, i believe that nurturing relationships is more important in the long run. this belief that meaningful relationships are important is also a big reason why i go to church. i was raised to go to church every week, and my parents always encourage me to go. however, now that i am living independent of them, i still go to church because of the sense of community i feel there. every week, the dorm mass is packed with people, and afterward we all gather in the lounge for “family time.” another reason i decided to come to notre dame is the relatively small size of the school and the emphasis on classes outside of your major such as philosophy and theology. as father grove said, “the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 this statement sums up what i think notre dame is trying to cultivate, which i think is important. i believe that it is very important to develop a well-rounded character. these classes will help me become a more complete thinker and give me more tools in my future. some of my favorite classes right now are my philosophy class “god and the good life” and my usem “migration in literature.” i enjoy these classes not only because of the interesting content but because of the small class sizes that make it easy to make friends and form connections. as david brooks emphasized in his ted talk from week two (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two), i believe that it is much more important to live for the eulogy than the resume. in my philosophy class, we spent a lot of time discussing what happiness means. we discussed “hedonism” which is the belief that happiness is just achieved by pursuing pleasure as much as possible. we also learned about “eudaimonia” which is aristotle’s view of happiness. he believed that you achieved eudaimonia through fulfilling your function. he said that our function is to act rationally, however i disagree on this part of his philosophy. i believe that our function is achieved through helping others. as fr. pete said “none of us get to escape the complexities that life has in store. in the face of such a reality, what are we going to do?” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). life often throws bad situations and hard times on us, and i think that it is necessary for us to help each other through these times. faith is one way to keep hope through these hard times, but i also believe we can find hope and comfort in those around us. if you can make life a little better for each person you encounter, then your life has purpose and meaning. everyone we see may be going through a hard time, and we can never assume anything about people. as we talked about in week seven, assuming things about people based on what we have heard https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois (especially if we have only heard one story) can lead to very negative consequences because those assumptions are often wrong and biased (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i believe that i can also find meaning in a career in engineering. as an engineer, i will be in a position where i can help a lot of people, whether i am doing something on a small scale to help individuals, or on a larger scale to help society as a whole. i think i first developed this belief after watching my dad work as a vocational rehabilitation engineer. he has helped many people through his job, and that is something that i really liked about engineering. my mom is a nurse and has also helped countless people, but engineering was more interesting to me than healthcare. this belief has been challenged a little bit after learning more about what many engineers do. many mechanical engineers go into the auto industry, and while the work could be interesting and necessary, i don’t think it would be that meaningful. however, there are many different opportunities for engineering, so i think i will be able to find one that is meaningful. ultimately, these root beliefs make up who i am, what i do on a day-to-day basis, and my goals for the future. i believe in doing what i can to help others, challenging myself to become a more well rounded individual, but most importantly working hard to form deep connections. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story works cited “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one “where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four “two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five “should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two “the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three “the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration 2 1 stephanie rincon-brambila professor whittington moreau 03 december 2021 in the pursuit of life it is common knowledge that in order for a flower to grow it needs sunlight, water, and soil with nutrients. matshona dhliwayo once said, “if you tend to a flower, it will bloom, no matter how many weeds surround it” (matshona dhliwayo). growing up surrounded by violence and a low appreciation for education, at times it was difficult to find the motivation to further my education. by starting a new phase in my life where there are new experiences and opportunities i did not have before, i have developed an understanding of the different perspectives individuals have. thus, this has allowed me to find a reason, a motivation, to further my education. in my short time at notre dame, i have encountered life and each day my response to my experiences differs. as i have mentioned previously, i used to find it nearly impossible to develop the motivation and encouragement i needed in order to go to college. thus, when i got my acceptance to notre dame i was in utter disbelief, my immediate reaction was that it had to have been a mistake, that there was no way i had gotten accepted into the university of notre dame. when i started attending notre dame i could not shake off the feeling that despite my so-called accomplishments, i was not good enough to be a student here. “why can’t so many of us shake feelings that we haven’t earned our accomplishments, or that our ideas and skills aren’t worthy https://www.bloomaker.com/blog/55-inspirational-flower-quotes 2 of others’ attention,” elizabeth cox continues to say that “she and her patients experienced something that goes by a number of namesimposter phenomenon, imposter experience, and imposter syndrome” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). imposter syndrome would be one of the first challenges that i would face during my time at notre dame. as days go by i have to constantly remind myself that i do belong here, that i earned my admission into this community of people. i am sure that i am not the only one who feels that, and in some strange manner that is comforting. every day is a struggle in fighting these thoughts that i do not belong, but every day i fall more in love with this institution, making it a bit more bearable. i know in due time, i will feel as if i truly belong, and hopefully, anybody else who has a similar problem will also realize that they belong as well, that they deserve to be here. with this in mind, it seems that i have encountered life, the life that i am willing to fight for. one of the primary reasons why i am willing to challenge these difficulties is to keep encountering this glimpse of the future life i want. if i continue to encounter life, it reminds me that i endure these rough patches in life in order to give back to my community that despite its flaws made me the person i am today. father jenkins once said, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr john jenkins c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). in my community, i grew up constantly being surrounded by violence, gangs, gunshots, and deaths. since i was small and i did not have a complex understanding of how the world worked, i thought that every kid grew up the way i did. at the time i did not understand https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ 3 that i had encountered a life many people did not face, that the conditions i lived in were not typically normal. at notre dame, i have met so many distinct individuals who grew up with unique circumstances. although at times, to be honest, i feel this sadness envelop me when i realize the different lives we each lived. it has allowed me to develop the idea that despite the unfairness of the world, we have no control over the circumstances we are born into, but as notre dame students we can comprehend different perspectives and become more open-minded. the love i have for my community serves as a motivation to keep working hard during my journey at notre dame. instead of holding me back, my community pushes me forward to a future where i can aid them just as much as they aided me. these past couple of months have allowed me to encounter life and its challenges on a new plate, they have allowed me to become more understanding and compassionate. although i speak highly of my love for my community, i have a long way to go until i can encounter a community at notre dame with the same love i have for my home. when encountering life in a different community, there are many challenges involved, some might say there might even be a sense of suffering. parker palmer describes suffering in such a vivid manner, palmer says that “suffering is what happens when you hold in trust a space for community to emerge but others lack the trust to enter the space and receive the gift. suffering is what happens while you wait out their resistance, believing that people have more resources than they themselves believe they have” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau week eleven). the university of notre dame does an excellent job of providing a variety of communities for its students, however, it also takes an effort from the student to become part of the community. here at notre dame, i am part of the community of http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 4 students and of the latino community. becoming a part of this new community made me feel like a stranger to my own culture and the culture of others. on the inside i was suffering, i was suffering from this immense sense of loneliness and sadness. however, as i grew to appreciate these cultures and make time to learn about them, it made me feel as i belonged in this community of diverse students. my time here at notre dame has taught me how to encounter life one step at a time, facing my challenges and fears piece by piece. every day, i face life with an optimistic lens. before arriving at notre dame, my spiritual faith was rapidly deteriorating to the point where it was almost non-existent. however, as time passes on, notre dame has given me the opportunity to strengthen my relationship with god. in the screwtape letters, c.s. lewis comments that “humans are amphibianshalf spirit and half animal. as spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time. this means that while their spirit can be directed to an eternal object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). by strengthening my belief and faith in god, it is almost as if my sense of comfort in this new community has increased. with this new opportunity, it was as if i was a blossoming flower finally receiving the nurishment that i needed. i will always be grateful for the chance to attend mass in my dorm and in the basilica, grateful for the chance to talk to others who have such an amazing connection with god. here at notre dame, i have encountered life from a spiritual perspectove. throughout this semster, one reoccuring question that popped into my mind was “what do i have to gain from this experience?” this university has given me the necessary tools to grow as a citizen of the world, to grow as a blossoming individual. i used to think that there was https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486/download?download_frd=1 5 only one path that i could take, that i would never be able to grow as a person. however, i now see that is not the case, every day i encounter a new day of life with all its ups and downs. my response to these challenges is not always optimistic, sometimes i lose motivation or i become sad, but i have met people who have become like a second family to me that support me. it is now clear to me that everyone lives and approached life differently, but i will continue living face-on despite my upbringing. despite us having different availability of resources (sunlight, water, nutrients), i have no doubt in my mind that we will all blossom to greater heights. encountering love 11/28/21 encountering love i have encountered commonality throughout this whole semester i have encountered a sense of commonality; that there are things that every person feels and experiences, especially in this one community of notre dame. we have all encountered things such as imposter syndrome, brokenness, but also hope and change. these commonalities are what brings us closer to each other so we can appreciate our differences in a positive and loving way. “community does not depend on intimacy and must expand to embrace strangers, even enemies, as well as friends.” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau week 11). when we are able to notice our commonalities, even with our “enemies”, we can build communities and accept those who are different from us. we often get stuck in ourselves, which at times is okay as we are the ones living our lives, but we forget that others are also living their lives. and those lives are filled with the same emotions and feelings that we have. everyone hopes, everyone encounters brokenness, everyone loves, and everyone is human. when we look outwardly into the world we notice that everyone is simply human, and we can take that knowledge and look into ourselves. it’s not just that everyone else has commonalities, but we have commonalities with everyone. it is this understanding and acceptance of these commonalities, both positive and negative, that helps foster love and acceptance. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ i have encountered change accepting change might be one of the hardest things to learn how to do, but once learned you can then appreciate the full chaotic beauty of the world. for a while i struggled with change as i did not have a lot of stability for most of my adolescence, and change was constant. though when i did get the stability i needed i realized that change is necessary. one does need stability as without it you will struggle to meet your basic needs both physically and mentally, but without change we will become stagnant and will never grow. once i gained stability i was able to utilize change and grow with it. “... their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change” (the screwtape letter by c. s. lewis moreau week twelve). the screwtape letter highlights the fact that to be human is to change, to exist in time is to change. change is a commonality that all humans experience, and it is in change that hope and understanding comes from. without change hope would cease to exist as hope is a want of change or a want for things not to change. to understand things change has to occur. you have to change your beliefs, ideas, and knowledge to understand the world around you. change is at the center of our worldly experience and to stop change is to stop living in this world. i have encountered beautiful people in these 19 years of living i have encountered beautiful people, and not those that are attractively beautiful. i have encountered people with a beauty that comes from within, that comes from love, kindness, acceptance, generosity, intelligence, and the innate worth that they have. “that they learn that the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today.” (women find healing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486?module_item_id=106257 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ through kintsugi workshop by grotto moreau week 10). people are beautiful because they are innately beautiful. these things i have encountered all build from one another into an amazing idea of ourselves and humanity as a whole. we are all beautiful in our own ways, a commonality we share, we are beautiful because we are ever changing, growing and learning from our experiences, and we are beautiful because we are simply living beings. at notre dame this idea of beautiful people has only grown. i have seen peers share stories of themselves and their home, smiling as they talk about the town they grew up in. i have seen professors teach with a passion that comes from a deep understanding of how knowledge can change people. i have seen this community, through its ups and downs, try it's hardest to build a space for everyone and work on problems it has so that everyone can be themselves here. i have encountered love the most important thing i have encountered in my life and especially in this community we call notre dame is love. love for learning, love for faith, love for justice, love for our environment, love for growth, love for everyone, and love for the act of loving. “wouldn’t the opposite of internal dissonance be self compassion?” (qqc 9: encountering dissonance by moreau week 9). i asked this question at the beginning of this half for this class, and i think the answer is yes, but also more deep than just a simple “yes”. the opposite of internal dissonance is self compassion, but also compassion that comes from one's community. compassion is the embodiment of love. compassion is a pure, selfless act of love. everyone has struggled with dissonance and self worth, but it is the love that comes from within ourselves and within our communities that truly shows the worth of ourselves and helps us battle dissonance. love has got me here and love will continue to guide me and help through my journey. “to love is to breathe”; that is a quote i used in my first integration and one that i use again because it is so https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1ga4n2wkveu6eswi8phqks5dkq1huhhdo1df26omea9u/edit simple yet so true. it highlights how easy love is, that loving is just like breathing, simple and easy to do, but if we also reverse the quote to “to breath is to love” it provides another beautiful and simple idea. to simply breathe means to commit an act of love, and since everyone breathes continuously it means that just merely existing means that you are committing acts of love. i believe that is an amazing idea. we encounter love every day, every second of our lives. the world we live in is chaotic, ever changing, but it is through this commonality of love that we become beautiful, powerful beings of change. we take a world that may make no sense and that can cause pain, and we turn it into a world that grows, that understands, that loves everything that calls it home. it is this idea that encompasses all that i have encountered throughout my life, that this world is my home, is everyone’s home, and in this idea comes love for everything that inhabits this home. schmitt 1 prof. lassen moreau final integration december 2nd, 2021 a brave new world if anything, my first semester in college has shown me how much i do not know. from general chemistry to international politics to philosophy, i cannot fathom how much there is to learn about the world. i am humbled to think that there is a lot i will never know. even in this short time, i have encountered wildly different perspectives and ideals that i was never exposed to before. at times, i am unsure of how to respond. coming out of high school, the world seemed less nuanced. now, i realize it is almost impossible to understand the extent of one problem, let alone fix a world full of problems. i have begun to focus on what i can control and the one thing i can surely change, myself. “moreau believed that life was essentially a personal, daily struggle for union with god … while none of us can be so perfect, the aim for the christian was twofold: to reach one’s fullest potential in this world while remaining focused upon the ultimate goal of fullness in the life to come” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james b king – moreau fye week 12). encountering so much that is different than what i have known has challenged my ability to figure out the dynamics of my life. in the pursuit of personal growth, i have greater respect for the unknown. while i am tempted to give an easy answer to discovering true goodness in the world, i must accept that there is not a beautiful, one size fits all answer i can give that would begin to satisfy the complexity of the problems we face. i can, however, take concrete steps towards making myself a force for good in the world. like everyone here, i have a unique personal journey in which i worked hard to gain acceptance to an elite university. i had grand expectations entering notre dame. in the end, i had schmitt 2 two academically elite choices. i chose a college for its catholic identity. when i got to notre dame i was confused at the lack of catholic identity as i knew it on campus. i attended my dorm's mass, the first-year mass, and other events. i could not figure out if i had not found it or if it was nonexistent. i understood and appreciated the diversity of opinion and background but was not finding the overarching catholic morals i have become accustomed to. this led to a lot of doubt over the first month of school and has persisted to a lesser extent until now. i have been able to attribute some of the prior expectations to the college experience, but i have had difficulty with the expectations that uniquely characterize notre dame. i have been disappointed by the disparity between my expectations and reality. i began to wonder if i made the wrong decision. despite this, i was determined to make the best of notre dame. i learned to “trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). i was out on my own and unsure of what to do. the best plan i could make was to trust myself. while i had to understand how much i do not know, trusting myself has helped me begin to make wellconsidered decisions for myself. i have begun to figure out where i belong and make notre dame my home. one of the biggest expectations i had was that i would find a unified student body working together for the good of the world. while i did find a student body working for the good, the good was not a unified vision. i had entered notre dame expecting to find a catholic identity similar to the one i had in high school. although there were a couple of catholic events, i was caught off guard by the freedom college offered. i was used to attending required events, but now in college, it is up to me to pursue catholic obligations. in a short time on campus, i schmitt 3 encountered a significant student population that was not catholic or even christian. in addition, the christians i knew came from wildly different backgrounds. i quickly found cultural and fundamental differences between us. i was able to find common ground and have still made a lot of friends, but i still find it difficult to accept or know how to respond to the differences. i still find myself thinking that notre dame would be a much stronger force for good if we were united in a specific mission, but this mission begins with me. “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer – moreau fye week 11). before looking to unite others, you must begin by connecting and understanding them. without the information gained from truly being present and attentive, everyone will have their imperfect expectations of what the community is. one of the biggest eye-openers at notre dame was the explicit pursuit of solving contemporary problems such as racial discrimination and the political clash over the covid-19 pandemic. “two hundred and twenty-five years later, we are like actors following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others. play the victim. blame the enemy. stoke grievance. never compromise” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). it was frustrating to watch without having any power over the situation. i began to consider why god would let these things happen. i began to focus on god’s role in the problems of the world. i thought that if god could only reveal himself then all of humanity would be unified under him. i have wondered why god cannot come down and reveal himself to man and show us concretely that he is real, and his promises exist. the writings of c.s. lewis, specifically the screwtape letters, have helped me schmitt 4 think through this issue. c.s. lewis points out that god will never override human will and that is the ultimate reason for god’s inaction. “but you know see that the irresistible and the indisputable are the two weapons which the very nature of his scheme forbids him to use” (“screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week 12). god will not force anyone to follow his laws. humanity was not created for this. humanity was created to love god for his initiatives and to one day be reunited with god in perfection. it is easy to believe that god is absent in the worst of times, and the temptation for certainty in god destroys the mystery and much of the meaning in the existence of god. without understanding the reasoning behind the existence of god, the arguments will truly be led by blind faith. it is in god's nature not to force humanity to love him, for that cannot be real love. instead, we are called to love god of our free will. the consequence of this free will is disunity and suffering. when the world is seemingly full of problems and what you don't know feels bigger than what you do, it is natural to contemplate one's role in the world and the existence of god. you come to realize the importance of acting as if god truly exists versus living as if he did not. this brings me back to my early realizations of college life. i must control what i can control and work to better myself for the betterment of our community and the world. in our differences, we were all created in god’s likeness, and he designed us to one day be reunited with him in perfection. it is in struggling through the hardship, doubt, and big life questions that god instills virtue in us and brings us closer to him and his purpose for our lives. in the words of father jenkins, “go now — become worthy sons and daughters of your seminary. inspired by its example, go preach love, stand fast against the momentum of your times, and renew the face of the earth” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). schmitt 5 works cited julia hogan, lcpc. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-ofexpectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. jenkins, john. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “wesley theological seminary commencement.” office of the president, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminarycommencement/. king, james b. holy cross and christian education. campus ministry at the university of notre dame, 2 dec. 2021. lewis, c.s. the screwtape letters. provided by the university of notre dame, 2021. palmer, parker j. “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal.” center for courage & renewal, 25 feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ my experience of notre dame moreau this semester in moreau, i have been able to expand and see my self-knowledge on myself and have been able to reflect more than i’ve ever been able to. i have struggled throughout the year, and i have gotten better and better over the past months. i have been trying my best. in class, i have been able to participate in a lot of meaningful conversations slightly, but sometimes i have been too nervous even to talktells because i do not want to say the wrong thing. i have been able to learn a lot about not only me but other students as well; it has been very honored to meet new people’s personalities and see where they come from in life enjoy it. i’ve been challenged more than ever to use my skills and thinking and join in certain activities that i probably would not do by myself or in my free time. i appreciate you professor finan; you have been doing a great job at teaching us, leading us in the right direction, and moving students around so we could group in conversations with different people in the class. this semester helped me a lot more at figuring out who i am, what i want to do in life once i get out of school, and once i stop dribbling the basketball. week 9 assignment was one of the best because it had me thinking about a lot of hate, and my discussion in class was a helpful way for me to grow in confidence and ignore doubters and haters from my life. the quote that stood out to me this week was, “everyone is susceptible to a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (elizabeth cox ted talk.) the doubt that we are holding ourselves crumbles us because we think we’re the only ones that feel like that. but other people do too. many more people in the world think like that than we think. it is also the fact that people that agree to this to other people feel better because people know they’re not the only ones that think like that. it helps them come together better, and then they can relate to each other and help each other become more confident. this week also helped me rethink relationships i had with people, and it made me question their true intentions. i already had a sense of this, but not living your life according to others’ expectations is super important because when you live by trying to reach their expectations, you really aren’t living your own life. you’re living their life instead of your own if you just try to gain their expectations. i learned about how people with hate and how they can get of that from their lives and live without that hatred anymore in week 10. i found an important quote from st. augustine i found was, “it is strange that we should not realize that no enemy could be more dangerous to us than the hatred with which we hate him.” this quote says how the hatred within people is more dangerous than the actual man that we hate. the hate with us is negative at us and our soul, and we become less good of a person because we carry that hate around in us. i think that there have been times where i’ve held hatred for someone else, and i hated that feeling of disgust. it is not a good feeling to be hated, but you have to block that out and keep moving. i’ve learned to overcome that hatred by reminding myself and saying that we only live one life, and i do not want to have that hatred hold me back from being my best for myself. god wants all of us to live in his image and likeness, and i do not think being a hateful person is something that he would enjoy. to overcome hatred in this world, we have to admit to it and give ourselves up to find ways to replace hatred within us for love so that we can all live at peace internally. there is no reason to hate someone because everyone has feelings, just like other people and like i said, we only live one time; let’s not take anything for granted. week 12’s assignment, i learned about how the devil is tempting us all and how we must remain hopeful and trust in god and his plan for everything. even though it might sound good at the moment, the devil tries to tempt us by giving us things for pleasure at the moment instead of giving us something that will make us eternally happy. the devil and the demons know that they will never win the battle with god because god is too powerful. a quote from chapter 8 in the screwtape letters says, “one must face the fact that all the talk about his love with men, and his service being perfect freedom, is not mere propaganda, but an appalling truth. he does want to fill the universe with a lot of loathsome little replicas of himself -creatures whose life, on its miniature scale, will be qualitatively like his own, not because he has absorbed them but because there will freely conform to his. we want cattle who can finally become food; he wants cattle who can finally become sons.” the demon screwtape said this to the demon wormwood, and it’s clear to see that even the demons know of god’s strength and power. he says how god gives humans the right to choose either good or evil, and since god gives this right, they have to try to pick off the weak humans. demons use people’s souls as food, where as god keeps our souls protected and in eternal peace. i will say there have been times in my life when i’ve chosen the wrong decision, and there have been times when i chose the right decision. the main thing i’ve learned is that when things in life aren’t looking the best, i keep my faith and hope in god. he gives challenges to everyone, and it’s up to us to decide whether we want to believe in him and trust him or give in to the devil’s temptations. the ways that this semester’s class has been able to help me improve the faith i have and my mental health about things has been an excellent experience. i’ve came outside of my comfort zone a little bit but i still have work to do, and have been able to kinda but slighty talk in conversations and make friends with people who have a lot in common with me. the devil will always try to make us do the wrong choices, so it’s always good to think about what jesus would do and what god would want us to do. i there are many good ways to deal with hate within people and replace that hate with love. i also believe that it’s essential to live our lives according to us and not live up to the expectations that other people want us to. it is very essential to stick with yourself and be yourself and do not let anyone come in the way of doing what you want to do. thank you professor finan for helping with with everything throught this class. i have struggled and havent been doing what i was told at the begginning of the class but i feel like i have made improvement and hope you have enjoyed having me in your class. thankyou. huang 1 mr. lassen moreau first year experience 25 november 2021 reflection on my first semester at notre dame this past semester at notre dame has been an extremely fun, challenging, and transformative experience. being thrust into an environment where i’m constantly learning new things has been overwhelming at times, but this fresh start has pushed me to reflect on important questions and priorities in life. throughout high school, getting stellar grades was very important to me. i would put schoolwork ahead of social activities because i viewed the latter as a distraction from the former. however, after living and learning from my peers in college, i’ve realized that building strong relationships is equally as, if not more important than academics. community is the part of notre dame that will become part of who i am and will also be a big way i contribute to the campus atmosphere as a whole. right now, grades feel very important, but ten years into the future, it’ll be the friendships i’ve formed that will truly matter. as community is “not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received,” i need to make myself available to receive it (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). this includes making it a priority to eat dinner with friends and setting aside time to talk with roommates after a long day. while i still put forth my best effort with schoolwork, i’m now better about not stressing over assignments when i’m spending time with others. the “capacity for connectedness” comes “through contemplation,” and being able to reflect on challenges with http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ huang 2 each other strengthens our relationships at notre dame (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). though academics may no longer be what i focus on the most, it is still one of my main priorities as a student. in the context of the university’s mission for being a force for good, an important question has emerged as a result of my notre dame journey: how can i use my academic interests to benefit society? i’ve experienced some internal dissonance over this issue, as business (my primary major and passion) is an inherently profit-driven industry. with post-grad job recruitment starting sophomore year and the wealth of opportunities available on campus, i’m torn between using my little free time to join business-orientated service groups versus pursuing professional ambitions through career exploration and networking. it’s easy to say things like “trust yourself…look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). but in reality, it’s hard to follow through on this advice due to many considerations like job stability, family obligations, and the potential opportunity cost of taking risks. this is a question i’ll continue contemplating during my time at notre dame, and being open-minded about new opportunities will be an important part of that process. making sure i don’t “let [my] life be dictated by expectations” will broaden the scope of what i can achieve, and this is a good mindset for finding creative ways for using my skills in service of others (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). over the past few months, time management has been my biggest struggle and is something that used to be “black and white” but is now very complicated. i’ve had to upgrade http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau huang 3 old habits as i continue experimenting with finding a good work-life balance. in high school, it wasn’t too hard to pursue my interests and also have time to take care of myself. but with endless classes, activities, and events now at my disposal, i struggle to leave time for taking care of myself amidst a desire to take advantage of all these unique experiences. when i’m feeling particularly stressed, i’m able to stay hopeful through faith. knowing that god made it possible for me to have this buffet of opportunities and that his plan is greater than anything i could imagine, allows me to live and grow in hope. just like c.s. lewis stresses how humans are at their best when they “still obey” in times of difficulty, i grow in my relationship with god by relying on him to show me the path he has prepared for me (“the screwtape letters” by cs lewis – moreau fye week 12). as my friends and i talk about difficulties with finding stability and routine at notre dame, i’m often there to offer a hug or shoulder to cry on. “the lord’s choicest blessings come through the crosses we bear out of love for him and love for others,” and being able to be there for my classmates through their struggles makes me feel less alone in mine (“holy cross and christian education” fr. james b. king, c.s.c – moreau fye week 12). supporting each other also helps combat external dissonance in our community, as “the most surefire way to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox – moreau week 9). so though the whole concept of time management and figuring things out has become more ambiguous since arriving at college, it’s been a blessing to work through these issues and in the process, grow closer with both god and my peers. on the other hand, something that was once confusing that’s now been made clear is how to live in harmony with roommates. being assigned to one of the only quint-rooms on campus, i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo huang 4 was nervous about how the five of us were going to get along. but having spent the past four months with them, i’ve found that rooming with such a diverse group is not as hard as it sounds. (part of the reason is that i’ve been blessed to have been assigned great people as roommates in the first place!). something that has helped me is to let go of small insignificant issues. if a roommate, for example, makes a mess on the floor right after i vacuumed it, i try to check myself first by “call[ing] on [my] conscience to explore [my] convictions and how [i] express them” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c – moreau fye week 10). by first evaluating whether my ideas are coming from a place of love versus annoyance, i’m then able to express them in a way that helps us solve the issue rather than starting an argument. furthermore, even though we come from homes spanning the east coast, west coast, and midwest, represent over three different ethnicities, and come from families from the bottom to the top of the socioeconomic ladder, we’ve been able to become friends by “trust[ing] in our human and god-given capacity to relate to others outside our identity group” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. – moreau fye week 10). it’s been fun to hear stories about where my roommates are from and how that has shaped their perspectives on even simple things such as daily life habits. and when we do run into issues, they are usually resolved by compromise and trying to understand the other person. thus, though notre dame has introduced many big questions and made life seem more complex, rooming with others is one area that has become less ambiguous and actually quite exciting. overall, the challenges i’ve encountered over the past few months have also been extremely rewarding growth experiences. being exposed to so many new people, perspectives, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 huang 5 and possibilities means that i’ve normalized challenging my previous ways of thinking. heading into the second semester, i’m excited to continue prioritizing relationships, identifying career paths also do good for the world, improving my time management, and learning from my roommates. integration 2 undergoing the struggles of life when i take the time to sit down and think about what i have encountered in my life, i look at the things that i find most important to my life. the things that you find important are important because of the role that they play in your life. in my opinion, by pinpointing the things that have contributed the largest roles in your life you better equip yourself to respond to what life throws at you in the future. looking back at my life, one of the largest contributors to my life and self of identity is my family and background. being that my family is from eritrea, i was always worried that i would not satisfy my parents' desires for me. coming to america, every family dreams of their children doing well academically and going to the best schools. while these ideals definitely stressed me out from a young age, it is with good reason. my parents wanted to assure that their sacrifices did not go in vain. i think sometimes you must understand these expectations are not everything. “we will disappoint people. we will disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9). this quote from week 9 puts this in a different perspective. sometimes the expectations that we put on ourselves can be too much for someone to handle. i know that i am my own biggest critic, and i think that it is good to understand that these expectations are not always attainable. if i take the time to think about my past, things have not always been easy. growing up, it is common to go through tough times. however, it is important to remember that you are not the only person that has dealt with something tough before. it is how you respond to these situations that truly depicts what kind of person you are. “i want people to know that their hearts are breakable and it's a very good thing and is worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand”(women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grottomoreau fye week 10). my father once told me that nobody gets better by always being good at something, you have to constantly struggle to better yourself. the same idea applies to our hearts. by growing through rough times, it makes the good times even better because you appreciate them that much more. this also builds into how you respond to the situations that come your way, and how you react when things are not easy. whenever you are down or find yourself not being as productive as you like, it can be taken as a lesson. you are practicing for the future, because when we are young you can make mistakes in excess and will usually be okay. however, as life continues these decisions that we make during times of distress tend to affect more than only ourselves. we will find ourselves with wifes, sons, daughters, and all of a sudden you cannot allow yourself to crumble when things are difficult. this is why we shouldn’t feel bad during rough patches, but should see them as signs that things are getting better soon. in my time at the university of notre dame, one thing that i have noticed in the character of my peers is the empathy that people have. it seems to me that people here genuinely care https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau about the well-being of those around them. the video for week 11 had a good insight on this idea. “every story is a testament, a personal truth, and each must be heard as part of the larger story” (with voices true snapshot summary by klau center archive on racemoreau week 11). however, i do not think that this is true for all college communities. i have many friends back home that say that their college experience has left them feeling unheard, and more of a statistic than an actual person. when people do not feel like their stories are being heard, they are less likely to succeed in that environment. most of the time, a majority of the problems that people have between one another stem from people not allowing time to fully understand someone’s story. people have different circumstances in their lives that in turn create different outcomes. when people do not take the time to understand these differences, and simply assume things about those around them this is when people get hurt. we should all understand that everyone has their own story and these stories deserve to be heard. going through my first few months in college, i sometimes take the time to stop and reflect on how i am progressing in my new environment. before coming to college, i constantly worried about how i would not be able to succeed academically, socially, and everything in between. i was excited about this new experience, but notre dame is the biggest thing to ever happen to me. this new opportunity was incredibly exciting, but intimidating in the same light. however, as i have been here i am doing better than i thought possible. “this means that while their bodies can be directed to an external object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change..”( "the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewismoreau week 12). in my time at notre dame, i have found myself changing in a multitude of ways. one of these changes is in my routines. i think the closed campus truly allows me to tune in to school and my academics in general. here, i am a five minute walk from a great library and a fully equipped gym. i have started working out with a group of friends as well, which was not in my routine back at home. i also do not despise studying like i once did in high school. my classes actually have interesting components and so this allows me to genuinely engage better in class than i once did, rather than engaging simply for a grade. overall, this new opportunity has allowed me to tune in to a version of myself that i did not think was possible and i am so excited for what the future holds. https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?wrap=1 wilson 1 andrew whittington moreau first year experience 1 december 2021 finding meaning in the struggles of college this past semester in moreau has caused me to examine many implications throughout my life and more specifically my time spent in college. while many of us go into various endeavors expecting certain outcomes, sometimes it does not turn out the way we initially perceive. speaking on behalf of myself, i know that i had many concerns over this past summer as the idea of college creeped closer and closer while the months quickly passed. the most important concern to me at the time was my image. how would i portray myself to all of the new people i have yet to meet? will i act “too cool for school?” will i stay true to myself and my academic passions? i fully embraced these words from billy joel: “i’ve gotta get it right the first time that’s the main thing...you get it right the next time that’s not the same thing.” it seems that first impressions are so important, and i was worried how i would be perceived by others. however, after spending a semester here, i can say with complete certainty that this is not the case. these concerns as well as others have been answered while i continue to grow both mentally and emotionally. first, i have realized that people will accept me for who i am. i do not have to wear the mask of a stranger, but instead i can welcome my true self. although i understand this now, i certainly felt some imposter syndrome even before i first stepped on campus. when i initially opened my acceptance letter to notre dame i would be lying if i said i was not surprised by the result. i thought it must have been a mistake and was worried that i would not be up to par with wilson 2 my fellow classmates. however, the following quote sums up what i had yet to realize: “people who are highly skilled or accomplished tend to think others are just as skilled” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine). as i look to the future, i have come to terms with the fact that as long as i put in maximum effort then i cannot be mad at myself for failing. while this is much easier said than done, i attempt to live by this mantra as my life continues. another way that i have grown as a result of notre dame is by embracing the following: “there is beauty in brokenness” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto – moreau fye week ten). i find this five-word sentence simple yet powerful. it provides hope for all. you can always climb back up the ladder regardless of the size of the fall. i intend on taking this mindset into my future and apply it to both myself and others as it preaches great forgiveness. in times of trouble, it can be hard to forgive others, but seeing the light at the end of the tunnel is important to exoneration. as i encounter more and more hardships the importance of forgiveness becomes evermore clearer. only when we can forgive both ourself and others can we learn from our mistakes and grow to become a larger person than we were before the pitfall. throughout the many encounters in my life i have come to realize, “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). more specifically, this quote reminded me of something that my father commonly told me while i was in my youth. he reminded me that at some point in my life i will be at my worst. everything will seem to be going wrong with no light at the end of the tunnel. this may be catalyzed by a death in the family or some professional failure; however, it will occur at some point. he said that in this time i will look to religion for answers and that this is when the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo&ab_channel=ted-ed https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo&ab_channel=ted-ed https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ wilson 3 religious community is in fully effect. although we seek community in rough times, it is still important to understand that community is not a given but rather a gift. this was certainly something i took for granted before attending notre dame, and i hope to never lose sight of the value of the catholic church again. after recently reading a chapter of c.s. lewis’s “the screwtape letters” presented in moreau, i believe that his teachings also pertain to the topic of responding to encounters. in this novel he states, “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis” – moreau fye week twelve). the religious satire with a sly and ironic portrayal of human life provides both hope and inspiration to the religious community as well as those in great despair. it shows that even in the most confusing times we can still look to god for help and grace. i believe that it is in times of great distress that our hope grows. although some believers are forever lost in times of inexplainable suffering, those who stick with their beliefs and intents come out even stronger due to the power of hope. in conclusion, by reflecting on my past i have learned how i should correctly pursue the future. in realizing the importance of my own self value, the forgiveness of others, the support of religious communities, and the hope presented by the church, i have truly been enlightened by learning from my previous encounters. although the topics i touched on in this essay were some of the most valuable lessons i have learned during this semester, moreau has instilled many other life lessons that i will take with me as my journey through both college and the rest of my life continues. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zerkhihwaof2sg9s8djsrjg7fboujg8c/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1zerkhihwaof2sg9s8djsrjg7fboujg8c/view?usp=sharing integration 2moreau fye andrew whittington 3 december 2021 responding to differing views and lifestyles being a part of the notre dame community is a great blessing. i have been very happy my first semester here, and i would not rather be at any other college. what makes notre dame’s community so great is its special mix of faiths, lifestyles, viewpoints, and talents. i have enjoyed encountering the diversity within the community, but the greatest diversity i encountered was in the lifestyles and viewpoints. through encountering diversity in lifestyles and viewpoints, i have found my goal in this community, which is to imitate christ. the first thing i have encountered at notre dame is differing lifestyles. coming into college, i was really excited to finally meet people that had the same interests as i do. in high school, i connected to my friends in ways that do not relate my deep interests, which are music and religion, so it was an expectation of mine that at college i would finally meet people who could connect with me through these interests. specifically, i was looking for people to play rock music with and to share my faith with–i figured that these people would be my best friends. i was surprised when i got here how hard it was to actually meet these people. i could not find anyone who had the same lifestyle as me, who would rather play instruments or go to mass than drink every weekend night. i can definitely relate to emery bergmann’s description of college. she said, “the worst part was that i felt as if i were the only one who was this lonely. i’d see all these freshmen walk in packs — just massive groups of friends already formed in the first two weeks of school” (“advice from a lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html week 9). all of these people were forming acquaintanceships early on, but i was being very particular because i only wanted to form life-giving friendships. my very strict expectations for friends had been quite limiting. in her article about expectations, julia hogan said, “the point is, these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). i do not think my expectations were completely arbitrary, but they definitely were not the only way to live life. going forward, i know i need to be a bit more open to different lifestyles so that i can form more diverse friendships, and i will eventually find my perfect matches. the second thing i have encountered at notre dame is differing viewpoints. i really enjoy talking about religion and politics with people. i have had conversations with some people where we agree on everything and some conversations where we agree on almost nothing. i say “almost” because deep down most of the people i disagreed with actually have the same values and goals as me, but they have a different method of approaching the problem. in his article about critical race theory in schools, christopher devron described the two groups debating the issue, “one wants our schools to more clearly embody dignity, belonging and justice for marginalized groups. the other expects us to help our students transcend superficial differences and racial constructs by emphasizing our common humanity” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week 10). what this shows is that in many political debates, the values at heart are the same. once an agreement on core values is established, it is a lot easier to persuade someone to agree with you. in his speech, fr. john jenkins said, “our attempts to express our convictions should take the form of an effort to persuade. if i am confident in my beliefs, and i have love and good will for the other side, then it would be my duty to try to persuade them” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). i completely agree with him that persuasion is an act of love, not hate. when it comes to debates, the purpose is not only to prove another person wrong. rather, the purpose is to persuade the person into a different line of thinking. i have experienced a very great diversity of viewpoints, and i enjoy being immersed in it. in the talk about diversity, agustin fuentes said, “exposure and access to different viewpoints and life experiences offers insight and changes biases” (“diversity matters!” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). i agree that encountering different viewpoints is important for us so that we critically examine our own views. i will continue to fully embrace the diverse viewpoints that i encounter and have important conversations with the people i meet. although i have encountered greatly differing lifestyles and viewpoints, i know that i will find my spot in the notre dame community. being in this community means that i will not only impact others but also be impacted by others. in one conversation i had with a non-religious girl, she said that as a catholic, i should be guiding others to my faith by my example. i completely agreed with her, and the jesuits had the exact same belief of “lead by example.” in the publication about christian education, rev. james kind wrote, “ striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james kingmoreau fye week 12). in this way, i agree that as long as i am imitating christ, i will be successfully leading by example and filling my spot in the community. if i imitate christ, i will impact the people god wants me to impact, and i will meet the friends god wants me to meet. the diversity of viewpoints and lifestyles has been a core part of my integration into the notre dame community. my first semester has not been perfect, but i am still very happy. the diversity has allowed me to meet a great variety of people, which has had an impact on me and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414?module_item_id=106246 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 hopefully an impact on them too. through all of this, i have remained hopeful and optimistic about my future, and i am sure that i will eventually find my perfect spot within the community. now and next semester, i will keep trying to imitate christ in my words and actions so that i can fulfill my vocation within this community. integration one selm 1 josephine selm alison thigpen fys 10101 15 october 2021 growth in a time of new beginnings over the course of the past two months, i have been introduced to a vast number of new people and traditions relative to notre dame. from meeting people of different backgrounds and circumstances, to being immersed in my studies, my time here so far has been marked as an intense period of self-refinement and discovery. not only have i been forced to look at myself and my actions, i have also been made to look at my relationships with others and the effects that these can have. as a result, my core beliefs have been strengthened and better defined over these past few months, and i am therefore more sure of my principles and what is truly important to me, especially as i approach the rest of my education and establish my career and educational goals for the future. coming to notre dame marked a large change in my life, signifying a transition from childhood and dependence to adulthood and independence. a key thing i noticed upon this transition was the amount of anxiety that accompanied this. although i was excited to begin this new chapter of my life, it was all so new and further away from home than i expected, and i found myself closing off rather than opening up to new people and experiences, especially within the first couple of weeks. this led myself to evaluate my actions, establishing a key belief in the process, in which vulnerability is an important part of new beginnings. vulnerability makes us uncomfortable and forces us to deter our experior image, thus allowing connections to form. because of this uncomfortability, vulnerability is often remembered, as stated by brené brown, selm 2 “when you ask people about love, they’ll tell you about heartbreak. when you ask them about belonging, they’ll tell you about their most excruciating experiences of being excluded. and when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). if i had learned to show my vulnerability to others during the first few weeks of class, i might’ve experienced a far different notre dame than the one that i did initially, highlighting the importance that vulnerability plays in approaching unfamiliar situations. i ultimately learned that after opening up, my anxieties of how others would perceive me decreased greatly, and i was better able to enjoy my time here. following along those lines, my first few weeks at notre dame helped to build upon my belief that i grow by experiencing new things and subjecting myself to new situations. for instance, i took the via character strengths test in moreau, which i had already taken a total of two other times, both through classes i had taken during high school. every time i have taken this test, i received different results, signifying that my persona has changed over time, which can largely be associated with the effects of new experiences and viewpoints. one thing that i found struggling with in this process was the issue of letting go of my fears surrounding my future here. all throughout high school, i found myself placing an emphasis on school work, holding academic success over my own well being. approaching college, i didn’t want this to be the same case, as while i want to succeed academically, i also want to enjoy college and beneficially help others in the process. this tension between values was represented by david brooks, in which he stated, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i was in the same situation, struggling between external success and internal value -questioning how to redefine my own standards of success in the light of facing a selm 3 new environment. by having the opportunity to experience new things at notre dame, i have found a change from my past ideals and how i approach different situations, demonstrating that i have grown through these new experiences, and will continue to do so. coming from a catholic faith background, i never considered the fact that i might falter in my faith during college. despite this, i struggled to make it to mass the first several weeks of classes, as i was still learning to balance my workload and alter my time-management skills to be adjusted to my classes. i found myself to be constantly stressed out concerning even the most trivial assignments. it wasn’t until i was able to make it to mass that my own self-concern was highlighted, leading me to the belief that faith helps to ground me in reality. as put by david fagerberg, “spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“faith brings light to a dark word” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). by stressing over my own issues, i completely missed those around me who were also struggling -and it took me attending mass on my own accord to realize this. additionally, i found participating in mass to represent a constructive break from typical work and something to look forward to. by allowing this small viewpoint into my faith life, i was able to also view my current situation as a whole and highlight key things that were affecting my well-being in the process. looking back over my faith life in the past two months, i can highlight many areas that i can work on, setting standards for what areas i want to focus on in the future in order to help turn my viewpoint away from my own issues and towards those of others. as i was coming here with no knowledge of anyone else coming to notre dame as well, i started out with a lot of fears concerning forming relationships. over time, however, i have come to develop the belief that i can forge life-giving relationships by being open and by observing my own interactions with others. one topic discussed in class was the notion of building healthy selm 4 relationships, in which “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often, we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). much of this topic forced me to reevaluate my past friendships as well as my own actions with the mindset of determining the toxicity of these relationships and actions. not only did i want to see how healthy my past relationships were and if i should try to emulate them or avoid them here, but also i wanted to see if my actions themselves fostered a community of mutual betterment, and to develop ways to do this if they did not. additionally, i was forced to look at my own current actions and how those might be affecting my ability to form life-giving relationships. all of these have helped to strengthen my current friendships, both here at notre dame and with those from my hometown. a point expressed through the values of notre dame is cultivating people who want to aid others through their own actions, as stated by fr. kevin grove c.s.c, “[e]very discipline that searches for truth shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love” (“two notre dames: you’re holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5). not only does the university want to help its students grow in knowledge, it also wants them to enact change in the lives of others outside the campus community in the process, leading me to the belief that i am searching for ways to better the lives of others through my education here. although i am just starting my educational journey here, i have already been presented with a number of opportunities to complete this step. from clubs focused on community service to greendot training, a plethora of opportunities exist. it’s just a matter of selecting which areas i am most needed in where i can actively work for the betterment of others. looking towards the future, i home to become more involved in american medical women’s association, which selm 5 volunteers at st. margaret’s and a rosie place, as well as joining a number of other clubs and organizations that focus on community service within their membership. despite the new environment that notre dame establishes, we all carry things from our past with us. i believe that my community has shaped me into the person that i am, helping to distinguish myself from others. it has been shocking, coming from an area of rural indiana, to compare my hometown with those of my friends, and little cultural differences have been presented. a key one that i have noticed has been linguistic differences. for instance, my friends were surprised to learn that i say “pop” and “story problems” rather than “soda” and “word problems.” additionally, everyone is surprised to learn that my family owns a farm and cows, which is such a stark contrast from their suburbs and cities. a lot of these differences were alarming, because they highlighted something that i did differently; however, i had to overcome this fear that my actions were subpar in some way, but rather just an extension of my past presenting itself in my present. as george ella lyon stated, “... you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start.” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). my differences in viewpoints and actions define who i am, and set me apart from others, but they also work to establish difference, which is important for diversity and becoming knowledgeable about different lifestyles and cultures, and therefore are vital in establishing community and relationships here. building off this notion is that of stereotypes. we all can admit to developing stereotypes and assuming their validity, despite lacking knowledge of the truthfulness of them. although these stereotypes can happen naturally as a result of observed patterns, they do not effectively display a group as a whole, and can therefore marginalize those who do not fit into these selm 6 stereotypes. therefore, i have come to the belief that i can pursue truth by searching for accurate stories for every individual, which requires interacting with people of different backgrounds and becoming knowledgeable about cultures different from your own. in doing so, i neglect stereotypes that i might have built up as a result of implicit biases and learn to see others from a holistic point of view. as discussed in relation to these stereotypes, or single stories, “[w]hen we reject the single story, when we realize that there was never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7). i hope to be able to utilize my time at notre dame to continue to learn about different cultures, which i can then utilize to remove harmful stereotypes from my current mindset, thus creating a setting of inclusion for all. the past two months have been chalked full of new experiences, new people, and new beginnings, and not only have i been able to grow individually, but i also have taken greater interest in how my actions can affect others positively. i have grown in and strengthened my core beliefs as a result of this new start in my life, and hope to continue to employ these beliefs throughout my future educational endeavours, with the intent of aiding others along the way. these new experiences coupled with my own upbringing are helping to shape me into a better-rounded individual, as well as helping to define my goals for the future in the process, and this is only the beginning of this period of self-discovery that will continue as i grow and better myself with each new experience i encounter. selm 7 works cited fagerberg, david. “faith brings light to a dark world.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fa ll_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. grove, fr. kevin. “two notre dames: you're holy cross education.” university of notre dame, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4e b4-a1c1-d0a45c429187. lyon, george ella. “where i'm from.” where i'm from, a poem by george ella lyon, writer and teacher, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html. taylor, olivia t. “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/. tedtalks. “the danger of a single story”. chimamanda adichie. youtube, july 2009. tedtalksdirector. “should you live for your resume … or your eulogy?” david brooks. youtube, youtube, 14 apr. 2014, www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=296s. tedx talks. “the power of vulnerability.” brené brown. youtube, 6 oct. 2010, youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=296s embracing imperfection and hope i have always been someone who has believed that she can somehow achieve perfection by simply pushing hard enough. anything short of perfection meant i just wasn’t trying hard enough, and i believed i could take on anything as long as i put in the correct amount of effort. however, i have recently discovered that perfection can’t always be achieved by simply trying harder. as a result, i had to learn how to alter my perspective on perfection, manage my expectations, and learn to embrace hope and not discouragement. dissonance is something unexpected. in music, dissonance can be considered unstable and even unpleasant. but it is always used intentionally, and when it is resolved correctly it can make a piece all the more beautiful. dissonance is something i encountered when i was unable to meet the expectations i had set for myself by putting in the usual amount of effort. thus, i experienced what many refer to as imposter syndrome, believing that perhaps i was not where i was supposed to be, that someone had made a mistake that ended up with me being where i was. the dissonance was at first unpleasantbut its resolution in what it taught me made me grow as a person, and changed the way i viewed life to make it more beautiful. in her article, julia hogan says the following: “i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). my expectations had no meaningthey don’t matter. they were reflections of the person i wanted to be and not the person that i was meant to be. letting go of expectations is freeing because it allows us to be nothing but the person god wants each of us to be. in choosing to let go of these expectations, my yoke became lightperfection seems so simple, only requiring that we trust in god’s unchanging love for us. a homily i heard one sunday morning at the basilica gave advice that spoke to my feeling of imposter syndrome: do as much as you are able, then let god handle the rest. therefore, i try every day to simply do what i can, and leave the rest to god. in doing so, i am freed from the overwhelming need for perfection that once consumed my thoughts, and instead i am able to see that perfection is simply to be the person that god wants me to be. letting go of perfection means that one cannot be discouraged by failures. discouragement causes us to believe that we are incapable of changing, of continuing to try in the midst of failure. when we are discouraged, we are unable to accept that things will always be imperfect. it is especially easy to feel discouraged when encountering brokenness in our communities. it is easy to respond to the brokenness we encounter by contributing our anger and resentment. however, what is required of us is to view the world with hope. when we have hope, we believe that change is possible, and when we are able to imagine a better world, we are able to be the ones who create the goodness that we wish for the world. we cannot control the goodness of others; as father john jenkins said, “we cannot directly reduce anyone else’s hatred” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week ten). we cannot save the world by hating those who cause it to be broken. however, we are not called to bring perfection to a broken society; we are only called to be a light for others through our own goodness. someone i know who embraces this call to goodness is my high school math teacher. originally, in his attempts to “save the education system of memphis,” he became “blinded by his arrogance” that he alone was able to heal the brokenness that is memphis, tennessee. being unable to do so, he became discouraged. however, his perspective changed after deciding to be a vessel for goodness. instead of attempting to raise himself up by his achievements in helping others, he was not fulfilling god’s purpose for his life. however, in deciding that it is enough to answer the call to serve in any way possible, and letting god handle the rest. even though the goodness he pursues is less glamorous than the greatness of solving memphis’s various problems, his program “memphis communiversity” has been a way to serve the community through love. i’ve had the opportunity to virtually be a part of this program this semester, and even though my contribution is small, i know that it is significant to the student i am assisting, and i know that it is significant to god. in his eyes, the smallest acts of service are great; therefore, we must carry out these acts of service with love. as my math teacher so eloquently says, “while greatness is endowed by the whims of external sources, in all of our interactions, we have the capability of creating goodness as it is generated from within. it is not self-serving but rather serves others. it is not a celebration of ourselves, but rather a celebration of our exact place in this incredible universe.” we each are put exactly where we are meant to be in the universe. some are put in positions to do great deeds of service that impact the history of the world; others are simply called to serve the communities around them, others simply not to contribute to the world’s hate. however, no matter where we are called, we are always called to use whatever talents we have to serve in love. without love, our greatest deeds are meaningless; but with love, even our smallest deeds can be great. embracing “our exact place in this incredible universe” can be difficult as well, especially when coming to terms with the fact that no community is perfect. a community that i have encountered at notre dame is the liturgical choir. i cherish my relationships with the people in this group, and i believe that the music we create has a healing effect, at least to my soul. i made this discovery one morning before mass when reading about the communal effect of psalms for my theology class: “they bind together those who are at variance: they reconcile those who have fallen out; they heal those who have been hurt or offended. for who will fail to forgive the neighbor whose voice has blended with his own in praising god? it is surely a great bond and token of unity, when a multitude of people come together to form one choir. the harp has various strings, but there is but a single symphony. few though the strings are, the fingers of the musician often make a mistake. but the spirit at work in the people knows not how to err” (saint ambrose, “commentary on psalm 1”) ambrose’s words resonate with me, and make me appreciate the community of voices that comes together every week to worship god. however, my initial feeling towards being in choir was that of discouragement. firstly, i experienced the familiar imposter syndrome because of the difficulties i had with sight-reading music and singing a voice part i had never sung before. i felt unworthy of being in the choir and thought that i was letting everyone down at every practice. secondly, i struggled with loneliness on account of the fact although i loved everyone in the choir, i struggled in creating intimate relationships with any one person. thirdly, i soon realized that i am, in fact, much less catholic than this particular group of people. my family is not particularly catholic, i was never quite catechized, and i had grown up with friends who would have liked it better if i weren’t catholic. realizing that i don’t know exactly where to genuflect or the order of what happens in a mass, or the fact that my family never did confession or the stations of the cross, or the fact that i had no idea that there are two sauls in the bible, all led to feelings of inadequacy. however, my perspective has since changed about how i view the choir since i have changed how i view perfection. originally, i believed that i needed to be perfect in every practice and in every one of my interactions with the other members of the community. however, the past couple of months have taught me that i do not need to bring perfection to my community because there is no such thing as a perfect community. i learned that it is enough to love my community even if i am not intimately connected with it. according to parker palmer, intimacy is not required for a community to be connected: “intimacy is neither possible nor necessary across this entire range of relationships. but a capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). after embracing this view, my new desire simply became to love this group of people and to show that love to them, instead of trying to be loved by them. and when my fear of imperfection was replaced with love, intimate relationships came along with it. and through these friendships, i have learned that it is not perfect singing that brings us together as a group. most of us aren’t perfect: many can’t sight read and learn music by simply listening to the people who remember the pieces from last year. others depend on online recordings to learn music. and as i’ve learned, mistakes and getting lost are common occurrences, even on sundays. nevertheless, we carry each other as a group, as our ultimate goal is not individual perfection but to create beautiful harmonies together. today, our choir director told us about how group singing is a sort of empathy. our heartbeats become synchronized when we sing together, and producing good sound means listening to the voices of others. i therefore believe that it is not just our voices that harmonize every sunday; it is our souls as well. the reason for this is that, as i’ve learned, several of the choir members are not there because of sheer musical talent. through the conversations i’ve had, i’ve heard many reasons as to why people joined the choir: some to become closer to god, some to just make friends, some because of musical skill, some because they sang in choir in high school, and others have told me that they have no idea why they decided to audition for something they’d never done before, but are so glad they made that spontaneous decision. and many have also felt the similar feeling of imposter syndrome and had even considered quitting after their first rehearsal. it is these conversations that have led me to believe that this particular group of people, who come from diverse backgrounds and experiences, are meant to be together in this particular place and time in the universe, that it was destined by god before we were even born that we would end up together. this, in my opinion, is the core of community. we are not all perfect musicians; therefore, the choir is far from perfect. however, there is a certain tie that binds us together, and it is not our talents. i’m not exactly sure what it is, or why such a broad group of people are so connected, but without this tie we would not be able to create the music that we create every sunday morning. it is through this tie that community exists in this choir, and by letting go of the need for perfection has allowed me to fully allow myself to be a part of this community. had “encountering hope” been our first week of moreau, my response to the readings would likely have not been the same. i can say that the first few weeks of notre dame were ones of discouragement. it is only through letting go of perfectionism that allowed me to replace this discouragement with hope. from now on, i no longer intend to strive for perfection; i only intend to strive for hope. i only intend to hope for complete trust in god’s love for me despite my imperfection. my desire for perfection came from a desire to be loved, but it is the love of jesus that makes everything clear. perfection becomes so simple when you know that you’re loved by your father. ultimate trust in his love makes holiness seem possible, knowing that it is enough to be a sheep in the arms of her shepherd. following my shepherd, i desire to know where he wants me to go and be exactly who he wants me to be. i am content to go wherever he takes me, whether it be serving the world in small or great ways. my goal is to follow whatever path leads me closest to god. i promise myself that i will never become discouragedthat i will always have hope that by answering god’s call, i will end up exactly wherever i need to be, through whatever trials and crosses i must bear along the way to get there. c.s. lewis perfectly describes how one can choose hope over discouragement in “the screwtape letters”: “do not be deceived, wormwood. our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” ("the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i am so grateful for the past thirteen weeks, and what they have taught me about perfection. i hope that in the weeks to come, i will continue to make new discoveries that have a lasting impact on my perspective of the world. sources: julia hogan, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” saint ambrose, “commentary on psalm 1” father john jenkins, c.s.c., “wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” parker j. palmer, “thirteen ways of looking at community” c.s. lewis, “the screwtape letters,” chapter eight integration 2 theo helm moreau fye 3 december 2021 my loving experience at nd as the first days of my new life at notre dame set in, i was constantly bombarded at baumer hall with the words “a place of special welcome”. when fr. rob (baumer’s rector) kept repeating this phrase, i knew what he meant, but i didn’t fully grasp the meaning of what he was really saying. yes, everyone will welcome the new freshmen to the dorm; however, the real question is will the freshmen feel welcome? many students initially struggle heavily with finding a balance between social life and academic work, me included. either trying “to find your people” like what emily bergmann from cornell kept trying to say, or trying to succeed academically even when you know you are putting your best effort forward yet still falling unsuccessfully can easily become disheartening and lead students into a consistent depressive mood (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emily bergmann moreau week nine). i have definitely found myself in similar scenarios to this many times each year. especially in classes like chemistry and biology where i study very hard but sometimes receive subpar grades, the process can be very discouraging and forces me to ask do i even belong here? this is a question i have to imagine many freshmen ask themselves, and it definitely was one that i struggled with heavily and still do. although i still struggle with finding my belonging here, i have still made many realizations about my life here at notre dame. coming from high school, i was used to receiving high grades, but of course now i have encountered a severe culture shock. i have definitely come to the realization in my life that my best may not always be enough. it is hard to acknowledge but a fact i must live in harmony with. as the kitsugi clip told us, “the good, the bad, the ugly, https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html all of that, it has made us a beautiful, dynamic, interesting person today, and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau ten). it is important to look at the good and leave the bad behind. the only reason to use the bad is to grow and learn to not repeat the same mistakes and to build back better. it’s hard to realize this and many struggle with coming to this realization; however, i have been forced to come to this and understand that this is the way i will succeed mentally and academically here at notre dame. the power of the friends i have made here has also definitely played a major role in my personal wellbeing during my journey at notre dame. making friends at notre dame was very difficult for me at first. however, harkening back to fr. rob’s point of baumer’s special welcome, i soon realized what was truly meant by this statement once i started putting myself out there. everyone in baumer has been here for me no matter what, i just never looked. luckily, i have made some of my greatest friends i and ones that support me no matter what i am going through. my notre dame experience and the way that i have adjusted could be summed up by saying “change is difficult but more possible when we see and hear multiple voices” (“diversity matters!” by agustin fuentes moreau week 11). the community here that i have experienced has been amazing and ultimately without them it would be impossible for me to still be mentally sane here. me and my friends have had some amazing experiences here that are too wordless to go on about. the plethora of experiences is unique and brings me happiness whenever my mind travels to these memories. however, one big thing i wish is that my high school friends were more similar to my friends from notre dame. my high school experiences were riddled with short friendships and shallow connections with other people. there are only a few friendships https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 that i still cherish from back home. i wish this was different and the relationships i made in highschool were more similar to the ones i’ve made here at notre dame. my notre dame relationships are fulfilling and loving. the amount of support and emotional upbringing i receive from my people here is so heartwarming and truly makes me keep going. i’ve never experienced anything like it before, and i most likely never will again. the culture here is so unique, and i can’t imagine going to college at any other school besides the university of notre dame. my college experience and the way college has shaped me already these last few months would be completely different. i often think about if i didn’t go here, and went to my safety school the university of michigan how things would look different. coming from the state of michigan, i am very familiar with the school and have never liked the school at all. the people typically are out to get you (it is graded on an extreme curve), the culture is distant and lonely, and the campus and college population is way too large for anything that suits me. i even visited my friend on campus for the university of michigan vs the university of ohio state football game, and it even more so showed me how grateful i am to not have gone to the school. it is an incredible institution, but i would have been extremely out of place. i would take the academic challenge posed to me at university of notre dame any time compared to university of michigan if it meant my social life at notre dame remained the same. i value the relationships and sense of community i have built here too much. ultimately, one of the best ways to summarize my life and time at notre dame comes from a quote from the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis “humans' nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation -the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks” (“the screwtape letters” c.s. lewis moreau week 12). life is never linear, and i should never assume different. word count : 1050 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187501/download?download_frd=1 the impact of change the transition from high school to college is rarely smooth for students. especially at notre dame, where students are randomly assigned to residence halls and randomly paired with roommates. although this ultimately had a positive impact on my growth as a person, it was everything but easy at first. coming from a very comfortable and blessed place loving family, tight and secure friend circle, even things like my own bedroom and going to notre dame and knowing no one (although i am still blessed to be here), i have encountered a great deal. from sickness, to loneliness, to stress in classes, it seems as if there has always been constant external dissonance in my first semester. however, just as the prompt suggests, as i have encountered a lot, i have also learned a lot. in the following essay, i will outline what i have encountered, how it connects to my experience in moreau first year experience, and how i responded. two things i struggle tremendously with are external and internal dissonance. i have been labeled as an “overthinker,” as i tend to place negative meaning on subtle gestures, thoughts, or statements that were not intended. thus, i learned a lot from julia hogan’s article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” in her article she emphasized the importance of not letting others dictate your life (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). thus, i encountered a stressful situation having no friends, no family, and no structure. however, i was able to respond by pushing through the difficult times, opening up to people, and, most importantly, letting go of expectations. when i did so, i noticed my mood improved along with my situation. ultimately, dropping my expectations allowed me to transition from a rough period to a much more comfortable place. as i transitioned through the first few weeks of college, i had to adjust to living in a new community. a new group of men to live with means learning a lot of new perspectives and opinions. it was extremely important to make sure everyone’s voice was heard and respected. this was the central message of fr. jenkins’s 2012 seminary address to make sure voices are heard and respected (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). i feel it is even more important now than ever, considering the political climate, the post-covid world, and the dynamic culture of a new dorm, to make sure father jenkins’s message remains heard. i had an encounter with a toxic community when one person in my dorm removed an “ally” sticker from my friend’s door. this is not the mentality father jenkins spoke of. i learned that i am now in a new community, vastly different from my community in hinsdale, and i have to make sure to respect others’ opinions, unlike the one kid did. there is no room for insensitivity here at notre dame. on the note of community, it is important to look at community through the proper lens. in her article, thirteen ways to look at community, author parker j. palmer outlines thirteen separate lenses through which community can be defined. one of the most interesting was point 5: ‘the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as “enemy”’ ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this point is in tandem with the main message of father jenkins’s commencement address. we must include everyone in our community, no matter how much we disagree with them. in the case of the kid who took the ally sticker, although what he did was wrong, myself and the community need to look at him no differently. we must accept him and embrace him and help him and teach him how to respect opinions. lastly, on the other side of negativity, we have hope. hope means different things for different people. for me, i look at hope as ‘optimism through faith,’ in the sense that i am still optimistic, but my optimism has a foundation of developed and deeply rooted faith. in the text by father james b. king, c.s.c, “hope holy cross and christian education,” he outlines father moreau’s journey to founding notre dame and how so much of notre dame’s success and growth stemmed from father moreau’s hope (“hope holy cross and christian education” fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). without the hope that father moreau had of a christian education, it is unlikely that notre dame and the tri-campus community would exist today. father moreau’s hope is concrete proof that massive institutions can stem from something as miniscule as a little hope. this connects back to my move in at notre dame and how my journey started off on the wrong foot. however, just like father moreau, and with some encouragement from my parents, i maintained hope that things would get better. i felt uncomfortable and a little homesick, however, thanks to a little bit of hope things turned around. as explained throughout this essay, i have encountered many difficulties and discomforts in my transition from home to notre dame. however, thanks to hope, community, and dropping expectations, i was able to overcome these initial difficulties and really begin to enjoy my time at notre dame. i have been able to respond in a positive manner. another takeaway i have gained is the importance and impact of randomized dorms and the rooming process. initially, as stated in this essay, i thought the randomized process would lead to some difficulties. at first, this was true. however, as i encountered new challenges with this randomization, i was able to respond positively. i feel confident in saying that i have grown a lot as a result of these difficulties and i would like to thank notre dame for presenting me with an opportunity to grow. ultimately, i have learned and grown through my experiences in this first semester. integration one viggiano 1 catherine wagner moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 michael’s moreau journey of self discovery so far, throughout my first few months of being at notre dame, my moreau first year experience has allowed me to deepen my knowledge in a wide variety of topics. throughout assessing various sources and discussing them in class, i have started to form personal root beliefs that will carry me through my notre dame journey and beyond. in week 1, we learned about searching for belonging. i can see why the university chose this to be the first topic, for being freshmen year of college, we take on new experiences that will form who we are as people. this week, i learned the most from brené brown’s ted talk, as she stated, “they were willing to let go who they should be in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). she, along with class discussion, helped me form my first root belief: i believe that allowing ourselves to be vulnerable to others is the only way that we can truly grow as a person. when starting anything new, especially something as meaningful as college, we are faced with new ideas and challenges. relating back to my root belief, i feel as we should be open to this change, for if we stick in our own personal bubble and only do what makes us comfortable, we won’t be able to experience new things. in week 2, we learned about searching for self-knowledge. this week, we took a personality test to learn of our character strengths and my lesser strengths (the via character strengths survey by the institute on character moreau fye week two). i discovered that my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup viggiano 2 signature strengths were honesty, kindness, humor, creativity, gratitude and my lesser strengths were self-regulation, leadership, teamwork, zest, and prudence. from this week’s work, i discover my second root belief: reflecting on our lesser strengths is beneficial for self-growth. it is easy to think about what we are good at, our signature strengths. however, realizing what we aren’t as good at and trying to improve them takes strength. no one can have any weaknesses, but we can work hard to limit them and improve ourselves for the better. during week 3, we learned about searching for a framework in our life. in the sources, they reference how faith can be a framework for our life. in father pete’s video, he discussed how faith plays a vital role in our life. he reminds us of the life that jesus called us to live, no matter our past mistakes. that jesus provided us a framework that will guide us through our central beliefs and help us fight through the tough times (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye three). he helped me formulate my third root belief: i believe that to have a successful life, one must have a framework they aim to live by. even though father pete was referenced faith, i think you can live a successful life without faith. about a framework, i am talking about having a structure in your life. without structure, our actions have no meaning. in week 4, we learned about searching for life-giving relationships. this week, we investigated the signs of a healthy and unhealthy relationship (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye four). throughout the evidence and discussion in class, i formulated my fourth root belief: i believe that i should forge life-giving relationships by promoting healthy relationships and eliminating unhealthy ones. at notre dame, we are bound to meet a ton of new people. when we form relationships with them, we have to make sure that we are promoting healthy relationships. however, this does not only apply at college for the rest https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ viggiano 3 of our lives, but we will also be meeting new people and experiencing new things. identifying what people you have healthy and unhealthy relationships with will lead to how much you grow as a person because unhealthy relationships can limit your growth by holding you back from the person you are aiming to be. in week 5, we learned how to identify narratives. in the sources, we read the letter that father sorin wrote to father general moreau ("letter to father general moreau" by fr. sorin moreau fye five). in this letter, one principle stood out to me that let me formulate my fifth root belief: i believe that we should take educated risks to live life to the fullest. imagine a life where you never took a chance, played it safe every time, stuck to what you were comfortable with; this life would be very unfulfilling. in taking these educated risks, we can experience the well worth highs and lows of life. in week 6, we were tasked with writing a poem depicting where we were from. ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye six). during this week, i further learned that where we are from defines who we are. after writing my poem, i realized my sixth root belief: i believe that everyone comes from a unique that defines who we are. after everyone reading their poems in class, i realized that none of us had all similar experiences. we all had various places where we are from that defined who we were. these were not by any means bad differences; they just showed how diverse they were. we can look at the surface level and see we are all notre dame students; however if you dig deeper, we can realize we all have different pasts that lead us to the point where we are today. in week 7, the last week of integration one, we learned about identifying perspectives. the source that was the most unique to me was chimamanda adichie's ted talk. when she talked about her college roommate, she said that "my roommate had a single story of africa: a https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html viggiano 4 single story of catastrophe. in this single story, there was no possibility of africans being similar to her in any way" ("the danger of a single story" by chimamanda adichie moreau fye seven). that story and quote helped me formulate my last root belief: i believe that we should broaden our horizons to different perspectives to pursue the truth. in college and beyond, we will meet people from various backgrounds. we must not stereotype them based on their previous race, culture, or any other status. we also should be open to learning about other people's cultures and stories, which will give you a more accurate understanding of others. in conclusion, discovering these seven root beliefs has led me to grow as a person over the past few months. in the future, in this class and beyond, i must apply these beliefs to my life. it is easy to acknowledge these beliefs, but by genuinely living them out, i can ensure that my moreau first year experience positively impacted my life. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story mayor 2 3 december 2021 professor hnatusko integration assignment 2 grow as i go one of the most important questions i have asked this semester is as follows: when you find yourself encountering people with racial biases, how do you correct them; similarly, when you find yourself giving into implicit biases, what do you do to eliminate them? this question is so important because it forces people to reflect inward on the relevant issue of racism. professor augustin fuentes says, “racial bias is implicit in the american experience” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven). this is significant because it highlights the issue of ignorance in america. americans need to do more than not be racist. they need to correct any implicit biases that cross their minds and use their privilege to retaliate against the racial hierarchy that benefits white people. professor fuentes explains how people make associations based on skin color, and these associations almost always harm people of color. at notre dame, i have witnessed implicit racial biases. one of my closest friends here is african american. he explains that while he loves notre dame, it is upsetting that people assume he is an athlete at the school. he says because of his skin color, people assume he cannot be at such a prestigious university for academics. this perfectly highlights implicit biases in america because the students who ask if he is an athlete mean no harm; they do not realize the associations they make are racially motivated. in my question, i made sure to emphasize that everyone experiences implicit biases. people must recognize these biases do not make them bad people; our brains are wired to make connections and assumptions. when people make no effort to correct these biases, their character is questionable. since the start of my journey here at notre dame, my appreciation for self-confidence and growth has increased in importance. when i was initially accepted into notre dame, i experienced severe imposter syndrome. this feeling of unworthiness intensified once i arrived on campus. i constantly compared myself to my classmates and wondered why i was chosen to study with such intelligent students. i started researching imposter syndrome because i knew many kids experienced it at top universities. while this helped alleviate some of my negative thoughts, it was not until i completed the week nine qqc that i realized how important confidence is. julia hogan’s quote, in particular, has helped me tremendously. she writes, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, grotto – moreau fye week nine). not only does this quote emphasize the toxicity of self-comparison, but it also highlights the importance of doing your best. a tactic i use to combat imposter syndrome is self-affirmations. i try to remind myself each morning that i am intelligent and worthy of being at notre dame. while it may sound silly and somewhat unproductive, it has been very helpful thus far. another resource that has helped me this semester is the video on kintsugi pottery. the video helped me realize that while i may be flawed, my flaws contribute to my beauty. while the cracks in the pottery symbolize brokenness, they also highlight growth. this duality is very profound: brokenness leads to growth, and growth is a beautiful thing (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto – moreau fye week ten). knowing that we all struggle and are broken in different ways helps me confront my imposter syndrome. i am grateful and privileged to have such accessible resources at notre dame and home to help me recognize my gifts and worth. before coming to notre dame, i thought one’s religious journey was “black and white.” i now know that it is much more nuanced and complicated than that. i once thought that one’s relationship with god was linear and progressive, meaning it only strengthened over time. now that i have been in theology for the entire semester, i know that one’s spiritual journey is rather divergent and everchanging. this realization that faith is not “black and white” has helped me realize the importance of remaining hopeful. in holy cross and christian education, the author wrote, “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). so, while one’s journey may not be linear, he or she should always hold tightly onto hope because the lord is all-knowing and omniscient; his timing is always better than our own. something that was once ambiguous that now holds greater clarity is how i can be an ally to underrepresented minorities – on campus and off campus. during the black lives matter protests, i often wondered how i – a teenage, caucasian boy – could make a difference. i knew i was not racist, but i also knew that was not enough. christopher j. devron wrote, “white people don’t get a moral pass by simply refraining from overtly racist acts. rather, they must examine racial biases within systems; reflect on how they participate in and benefit from these biases; and then take deliberate action to change them” (“should catholic schools teach critical racy theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j, america magazine – moreau fye week ten). this quote is extremely beneficial because it outlines what i can do to help be an ally. the first step to making a difference is recognizing my privilege. i need to understand intimately that i have benefited from the system that was designed by white people. i then need to help others realize this as well. i must also examine implicit biases that cross my mind and correct them. correcting others’ implicit biases is just as important – even if it means having an awkward conversation. it is my moral responsibility to continue to educate myself and others on how to be an ally to underrepresented minorities. integration two paulina romero december 1, 2021 integration two assignments from week 9-12 in my moreau class allowed me to look into myself as a person, rather than looking into those that surround me. this helped me go through a process of self discovery and self improvement which i did not know was necessary until i was forced to ask myself questions that i have never asked myself before. for example, on week 9 assignment “encountering dissonance” we were asked to look into our goals and achievements. i used to think that having a clear mind and focus on your goals would help you achieve them, and while it does help it is important not to mix those with expectations. having expectations can actually make it harder for you to achieve your goals, because if expectations go wrong you can be discouraged from wanting to work towards that goal. so i asked myself that question, “how can i work towards my goals and accomplishments without having expectations?”. something that was mentioned in the videos and it is very important to highlight is the following quote: “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine) i really like this quote because i feel like this should be a constant reminder for everyone. it may be cliche to hear that at some extent it may lose its power, but if we really try to live by it and pursue it instead of just thinking about it, it will allow us to earn that feeling of accomplishment without fraudulent thoughts invading our minds. this has specially changed for me once arriving at notre dame. in high school i had no problem reassuring myself that i was on the right track for my future because there was a clear cut between those who were dedicated to their studies, the ones who had a clear idea on what https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo they wanted to achieve in their future, and those who really didn’t pay much attention or focus to those aspects in life. but then, i arrive at a place where everyone is a derived version of each other. we are all over achievers, career focused, and dedicated to our education. so coming to notre dame really made me doubt my worth and my belonging, as i constantly needed to be reminded of how i can make the most out of my time here. soon enough i understood that i was overthinking way too much, that most students have the same doubts as i do. it was hard for me to accept but i finally knew that sometimes i will fail, sometimes i will not be the best at something or stand at the top, but it isn’t a step backwards in my dreams, it is just one bump to conquer along the way. this idea is also mentioned in week 12 of moreau “encountering hope”. though i had some issues understanding the reading, it talks about how flawed human beings are, and how everyone goes through highs and lows, and there is nothing wrong with that. i definitely encountered various obstacles since arriving at notre dame and the only thing that saved me from haunting thoughts of failure is realizing that all freshmen were standing on the same boat. especially where they mention competence, courage, and hope. an important part of the material reads: “competence can be acquired externally in many different ways, but courage is instilled over time by cultivating one’s heart and constantly directing its purposes beyond one’s self”. (“hope-holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve) i think it is a very important quote highlighted from the holy cross and christian education pdf, because it suggests that without courage you can’t be competent. and i think being competent is sometimes a misconception in the way that people think that being able to do stuff makes you somehow superior, and i don’t think it necessarily makes you any better. you can be good at completing tasks but i think having the courage to do so speaks volumes, because completing a task is something many people can do, it doesn’t make you special, but having the courage to do it even though you might not be the best at it, shows purpose beyond ability. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471?module_item_id=109281 for week 10 and week 11 in moreau we are faced with the idea of unity whether through religious beliefs or race. i think we are lucky to be in a community, where people of so many races and backgrounds are accepted and included. it shows how healthy of a community notre dame is, which makes my experience here, and the university my home away from home. this is extremely important because i can’t imagine coming here from the other side of the world, as some students, for them to feel out of place, or feel like they do not belong. in the little time i’ve been here i’ve never seen race being in issue, not for clubs or extracurriculars, or dorm community; while i have other friends currently also studying in the united states telling me horror stories, of the race issue in sororities and fraternities at their university. i think it is honourable that students and faculty still work on diversity struggles, or for that matter , benefits, in spite of notre dame being a healthy and inclusive community. it shows us students the importance of having a prejudice against other students, and allowing us to break barriers between people with different stories than your own, which eventually turn to everlasting bonds. one of the most powerful quotes in these last four weeks, and the perfect summary for all of the topics encountered is “hatred is poison” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by father john jenkins moreau fye week ten) this is a really strong quote because it’s clarity and straightforwardness gives it some sort of power. it really says that negativity and hatred essentially ruins everything and i agree. i think with hatred barriers are built, oppositions are created, and communication, love and appreciation decreases. all important factors to build a healthy, united and cooperative community. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109181 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109181 oscar anzola-schnell an empathetic community the most important realization i have made since coming to notre dame is the significance of empathy and openness towards all beliefs in order to create a positive community. we must all be able to freely opine on important topics and most importantly we must listen to others as well. through this together is that progress in society can be made. for this reason, it is critical to recognize personal instances of dissonance and attempt to correct them. one must always have dissonance in mind when answering questions relating to your beliefs and fight against bias towards the truth. for one to open to others and their beliefs, it is critical to be empathetic towards yourself. julia hogan asserts, “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.” this quote is important because it helps us understand other people as well. just as we are not perfect, we cannot expect perfection at all times in a community. we need to be able to all communicate with each other to reach common goals. this openness towards others beliefs allows you to grow as a person. in order to effectively do this, one must converse in a civilized manner with others. i believe fr. jenkins states this point well by declaring, “the moment i venture into tone and language that is unlikely to persuade, it can be a signal that i have left the sphere of respectful discourse. once i do that, my odds plunge of winning over another, and the chances rise that i am expressing hatred — which will lead to factions and fracture the common good. with the common good fractured, any individual good becomes a very fragile hope indeed.” i believe this quote is the answer to solving the problem of polarization in the modern world. i think people could apply this quote to their daily lives because it gives a clear indication of what to do and what not to do. we must come together to have dialogues and not ignore the other side. when we ignore other’s point of view, they quickly become a mysterious enemy with an unknown plan to destroy us. when you engage with others you manage to build empathy for their positions and better understand that we are not too dissimilar after all. furthermore, through respectful argumentation both sides will recognize the common goals all americans share and how we can all strive for unity and progress in society.coming from venezuela, i have seen a polarization in society which makes american politics seem remarkably civil, and it is not a positive thing. there is constant tension in the country and each side hates each other. as a society, we need to come together to become more empathetic which will naturally lead to unity. relating to empathy and unity, it is important to build a strong community based on love. parker j. palmer asserts, “this simple fact has critical implications: community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” i believe this quote means that we must let people express themselves and forge the bonds that nature dictates. to do this, one must look inward instead of outward when searching for community as community naturally exists. it is in our self-reflection that we realize what communities are and how we can improve by changing ourselves as individuals. personally, i believe this is why it has become clear to me that i need to value empathy more. when self-reflecting, i realized that i can become a better and more inclusive member of any community by utilizing more empathy. sometimes, i struggle to open up and since coming to notre dame, i have been encouraged to change this behavior. i believe by doing so i can contribute more to this community. furthermore i believe when one has hope in a community, there is a greater motivation to improve it. i believe we encounter hope in the rest of humanity when we place hope within ourselves. personally, i find hope when i am being the best version of myself. for example, when i am going above and beyond in academics and extracurriculars, i feel i am contributing more to the world around me and feel better about the future. i think finding hope is an internal battle. as it pertains to notre dame, i have come to the conclusion that a focus on education forgers people to be more virtuous and therefore leads to a better community. fr. james b. king states, “he expected instructors, whether religious or lay, to cultivate excellence in the classroom, be models of zealous virtue, and fashion a second home for their charges. he wanted those young people, as would any catholic educator, to carry their formation with them and be battle-ready for the challenges to their faith that they would inevitably face in the wider world.” i believe this quote to be very true of notre dame and it encapsulates the goals i set out for myself as well. it should be the goal of everyone to be as virtuous as possible and strive for excellence in an ethical way. of course, it is not always clear what the most virtuous path is in every scenario. however, i believe a good education allows people to be better prepared to make the right decisions when those difficult options arise. through critical thinking development, we can form a clear sense of what a virtuous person is. furthermore, by constantly challenging our worldview and encountering new perspectives we can fine tune our own notion of virtue to better include all people. this possibility of a more enlightened virtuous individual should give hope to all of a better, more empathetic future. in conclusion, this semester has made me realize that a meaningful community can be found through fighting dissonance, accepting imperfection, having civilized discourse, being empathetic, finding hope, and critical thinking. while all these topics might not be directly related, they all come together when the goal is to fosters a united, open society. works cited why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week 9 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. jenkins moreau fye week 10 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ hope holy cross and a christian education by fr. james. b king moreau fye week 12 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ , dec. 3, 2021 introduction it has been consistently remarked among scholars – with almost total unanimity – that life in its most natural state is exceptionally deadly, difficult, complex, and engendering of feelings of misery. the default state, according to these thinkers, rather than being pleasure, joy, nor happiness, has always been despair and suffering. the absurdist philosophy, pioneered by many great philosophers – including the french albert camus – has even developed under the guiding notion that life is always (and shall forever remain) meaningless. this struggle with the pains of life is inherent – and it therefore invariably grows and progresses until we finally begin to experience true woe, which in this instance adopt two forms: first of brokenness (in which life so severely destroys our fundamental selves that we fall into the chasm of despair) and second, of dissonance, in which the mind, crushed under the enormous weight of life’s great struggle, begins to fragment and crack. this work serves as a simultaneous discussion of these obstacles imposed on humanity by the cold hands of life herself – brokenness and dissonance and as an examination of hope and community, the tools one might employ to pull themselves up from the pit of misery. to underscore and better examine these points, i shall relate them on a personal level to my experience as a new student at this prestigious university, and shall detail my own confrontations with dissonance, hope, and community. to provide a short thesis of sorts that shall be underlain through this paper, i would assert the following: when asked what i have encountered, i shall reply, brokenness. when asked how i have responded, i shall reply, community brokenness and dissonance i may not yet have encountered total brokenness (and i count myself as fortunate in this regard), but much as another first-year student came to experience the sharp blade of dissonance, feeling an unpleasant “disappointment” in the difference between her ideas of forging friendships and the harsh reality of loneliness with which she was presented, 1 i too have been forced to confront a reality which has frequently differed greatly from my expectation. namely, i have been forced to confront what i have found to be the meaninglessness of my student life; i grapple with the meaning – or lack thereof – in my work and therefore the meaning of my existence in its current state this is the dissonance i have begun to experience. this unpleasant experience of dissonance is provoked by an overarching failure on my behalf to answer the question of why? why do i choose every morning to attend classes – to go to school? why do i choose to read, to write, to converse with others, to look at the world around me? why do i choose to subject myself to those things which i personally find to be less-than enjoyable? why, interesting as it may be, do i choose to write this moreau integration? what is the meaning behind all my work? let me use, for example, my body of three essays produced for my political science class. of those things i produce – my creations into which i incorporate my heart, soul, and mind – what purpose do they serve? they have no impact on other individuals or other objects. the completely fail to meaningfully affect anything really, nor to result in any significant outcome. again, my political science essays: are they ever read without a critical eye, without the mind of an examiner seeking to identify flaws, produce a final grade, and quickly forget the work i have so caringly produced? the ability and desire to create is fundamental to humanity and serves as a differentiating line between us and other terrestrial species; it has been often speculated that we may best actualise ourselves in the process of creation. but i ask myself, is there any true meaning to my creation? what personal purpose might i find in this 1 “advice from a formerly lonely college student,” emery bergmann, moreau fye week nine (https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html) de natura vitae from brokenness to wholeness intimate action? will my works ever truly serve someone, or something? my life at present follows a repetitive cycle of production without meaning, work without purpose, over, and over again. and it is in this cycle that i have found my dissonance. to briefly deviate from my personal anecdote, i should remark that others too have found brokenness and dissonance at one point another in their lives. my leadership, political science, and american studies classes have all, at one point or another, made mention of individuals who have been forced to confront the harsh realities of life and who have languished as a result: those who have fought for political freedom and equality have suffered; those many families of african decent were (in the foundational years of american history) subject to slavery, extrajudicial death, and dehumanization, and accordingly suffered; those many leaders who sought change and improvement suffered. while my dissonance is of a more philosophical form and is concerned more with a meaning to life, it is still felt by many, many others around the planet. consider the common trope of those who feel trapped in their lives, or detail their sufferings with such lines as, “i have nothing left to live for.” while my existential pain is, again, not of an exceedingly severe nature, i do too feel some degree of meaninglessness and dissonance. people from all walks of life have experienced brokenness and dissonance. dissonance, which is defined in one sense as a lack of harmony, accordingly, creates a lack of harmony between us people that should otherwise exist. we fight and argue amongst one another because we have succumbed to the hardships of life – because we have experienced pain and, in foolhardy attempts to write these external wrongs, seek external answers when, really, external problems may be solved only through internal processes (community, a potential solution, may, for instance, be found only in “the recesses of the human heart” 2 ). consider the lack of political harmony which we now experience, in which having been pushed by the extreme stresses of modern life – we encounter “ongoing conflict” and “polarization,” 3 the process by which we draw further and further away from each other. hope and community now to return to my own experience of dissonance and felt meaninglessness. as is often the nature of things, the hands of life present to use two options once we have finally become enveloped in brokenness or dissonance. we may either submit to this tragedy, once and for all – or we may choose to find some way to recover; to return from the journey of hardship and suffering as stronger than we were when we first began stumbling and tripping down that winding road. this, as the title to this work would suggest, is the nature of life. two ways by which we may accomplish this mental and spiritual recovery have been outlined by the moreau course: the first is hope, and while this is not what saved me from my feelings of meaninglessness, it does indeed appear for many as rope of salvation with which to climb from the abyss of brokenness and achieve the ‘wholeness’ cited in the title. hope is indeed quite fundamental and essential to recovery from brokenness. many individuals placed in the darkest of situations have been able to survive, and to live, because of their discovery of hope. viktor frankl, who managed to emerge from one of the darkest tunnels ever journeyed – the torture and pain in the auschwitz concentration camp – said (many years after his liberation) that as long as he had hope for life, he simply could not allow himself to die. i personally see no argument of greater strength for the saving power of hope. indeed, in my american studies class, we quite closely studied the famous abolitionist frederick douglass, who would often speak on hope – hope of a better future, and of equality for all – often with the same vigour and emotions that frankl would later employ. the campus ministry also talks in great length about the saving grace of hope; 4 they proclaim the impressive power of hope through a quote that “we must be men with hope to bring,” for it is by bringing hope to another that they may be saved from their despair. they very truly state that hope is a gift to humanity. the other way by which one might find deliverance from the suffering of brokenness and dissonance is in community – and it was through this avenue that i was able to find my own escape. i have found my meaning in the friends i have 2 “thirteen ways of looking at community?” parker palmer, moreau fye week eleven (http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/) 3 “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” christopher devron, moreau fye week ten (https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792) 4 “holy cross and christian education?” the campus ministry, moreau fye week twelve (pdf document; no citeable link). made, and the relationships i have worked to forge; and these friendships, this community, have certainly been the most pleasant “gift to receive.” 5 by devoting myself to others, i have found not only a meaning separate from my academic affairs – from which i may draw sustenance in times of difficulty – i have also found a group of people who sincerely enjoy my company, and with whom i may share the small joys of life. the feeling of support that i have found within my friends here at notre dame is absolutely invaluable and has served as the basis for the parting advice i delivered to my brother, who is now himself just beginning the college application process: “choose a school with a great community. it matters more than you know.” i have found strength and purpose in my friends and liken their presence to a hand that, when needed, curls around me like a closed fist until i am totally enveloped in a protective shield. and this is also the way by which may others find value and meaning. when moving to a new place, or experiencing brokenness, many turn to the support of their friends and to the very same form of community as that which has been described in our moreau course. these are not the only paths by which one might walk towards the light, however. again, using my personal feelings of meaningless, how have the most prominent among us humans attempted to inject find meaning into their lives? potential resolutions have often taken the form of a desire to act in ways that fundamentally change the shape of the world. the giants of today construct empires of business and personal finance, finding their own meaning in the inventions they have created, the financial empires they have constructed, or the charitable causes they have championed. military leaders of all sorts have conquered and fought, finding meaning in the protection of country and of the communities or groups they champion. they may find contentedness knowing that they have shaped the world and that their actions shall be remembered for all time in the historical record. roman emperors built roads stretching across europe that still see use even today – some 3000 years later – or carved impressions of themselves into marble and stone. latin, the language of those emperors (and a significant lasting piece of their legacy) continues to be used today, mostly within scholarly works and for scholarly terms. in emphasis of this point, this very piece is titled under a latin name meaning, in english, “on the nature of life.” i would be remiss, however, if i did not make mention of a certain caveat. as is somewhat poetically the case, community and hope both serve as saving solutions to the issue of brokenness – but when even slightly overused, they become dangerously poisonous to ourselves and others. when overly reliant on community, for instance, this overuse may develop into any number of extremisms: cults – which may adopt various forms but always share a common thread of complete overbearing community – are one such example. an overly fierce dedication to a community that presents itself in the form of a nation may lead to feelings of supremacy, nationalism, and, indeed, open conflict. similarly, an overreliance on hope may turn one into an unrealistic dreamer, ungrounded from reality. as is the case with many things, the wisest individuals are those able to achieve some sort of moderation. the future in the future, i shall undoubtedly have to place great emphasis on building and maintaining strong friendships – for it is by way of these friendships that i have managed to find significant purpose, meaning, and contentedness. in the past, i have focused significantly on my work and have used my pursuits – academic and extracurricular alike – as the basis by which i have found purpose and enjoyment. now, however, i have decided to diversify, and to include my new friends as a prominent source of these emotions. i thus would like to re-iterate the pseudo thesis statement i made earlier: when asked what i have encountered, i shall reply: brokenness. when asked how i have responded, i shall reply: community. my community is the result of progress i have made, and i shall continue to work to strengthen the links which bind me to my friends – while simultaneously searching out for new friends and new people to meet. if anything, community is a gift i “have been given from the beginning but [am] still learning how to receive.” 6 5 “thirteen ways of looking at community?” parker palmer, moreau fye week eleven (http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/) 6 “thirteen ways of looking at community?” parker palmer, moreau fye week eleven (http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/) mrs. kelly moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 identifying my identity i believe that i am enough. navigating the world as an insecure teenage girl can be difficult. it is easy to fall victim to lies such as “you are unworthy” or “you need to be prettier, skinnier, smarter, more elegant, etc.”. reframing this thinking seems impossible, but it is essential to properly living christ’s call. in brene brown’s ted talk, she stated, “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brownmoreau fye week one). this quotation resonated with me. i work diligently in the pro-life movement on campus preaching the dignity and intrinsic worthiness of every individual. however, i realize that it is hypocritical to preach this and not apply it to myself. in david fagerberg’s article, “faith brings light to a dark world”, he claims, “love is to will the good of the other” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerbergmoreau fye week three). by self-inquiring if i am willing the good of the other frequently throughout my day, i better love those around me. however, i did not think to apply this to myself until my moreau instructor wrote to me in a comment, “a quote that another one of your classmates highlighted that i think is important here is "i am enough." i hope you remember that.” this brought tears to my eyes, and i knew i needed to actively pursue feeling worthy. since then, i have tried to self-correct my thinking and apply “love is to will the good of the other” to myself, and i am beginning to believe that i am enough. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i believe i forge life-giving relationships. i have been blessed with wonderful friendships at notre dame in her article, “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship”, olivia t. taylor explains, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week four). i can tell my friendships are superb by the fact that this quotation applies to them. i am incredibly blessed to have versatile friends. we go from studying to praying to laughing and dancing and singing to having deep conversations so effortlessly. they help me grow to be a better person, and i, in turn, try to help them. i believe i am resilient. as ella george lyon discussed the writing of a “where i’m from” poem, she advised, “remember, you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start. let it flow. trust the work to find its own form” (“where i’m from” by ella george lyon moreau week 6). i definitely listened to this advice, as my poem was creative, raw, and vulnerable. i discussed the many challenges i have faced, but in the end, i acknowledged that i have overcome every obstacle that presented itself to me. sometimes i ended up a bit tattered and worn, but each difficulty made me stronger than before, and i bounced back. knowing this about myself helps me face new challenges. i evaluate rough situations, and i remind myself of my previous battles. i lift my head up, and i work my hardest to triumph. a simplistic example of this in my notre dame experience thus-far was my taking on the challenge of 21 credit hours. at first, i was terrified, and i pleaded to my advisor to let me drop a course. she reminded me that i got into this program, which is indicative of my previous academic success, and she told me that she knew i would be successful. after much contemplation, i rose to the challenge, and i https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html am currently successfully completing this large course load. i thoroughly enjoy my classes, and i am excited to take another rigorous and full course load next semester. i believe i am catholic. as a cradle catholic, it was not surprising to receive “spirituality” as my number one strength in the via character strengths survey (via character strengths survey – moreau fye week 2). my spirituality shapes my life. from simple things like prayer before meals and attending sunday mass to deeper things like viewing moral issues through a lens of faith, i let my catholic identity guide me in almost all i do. it helps me decide who to become friends with, which was a huge challenge in the shift to college. when i started regularly attending catholic events and praying for guidance, my friendships multiplied, and they continue to be fruitful. my catholic identity also guides me in my treatment of others. i make a conscious effort to avoid gossip and detraction because it defiles god’s creation. in my time at notre dame and beyond, i hope to grow in this identity and help others make it a preeminent part of their identity. i believe i am truth-seeking and goodness-promoting. writing to father general moreau, father sorin explains “this college[notre dame] will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (“letter to father general moreau” by father sorinmoreau fye week 5). i am beyond glad i chose this university. there is something so special about the individuals i meet here; they are almost all seeking goodness and truth. they want to promote the common good and help others grow in virtue. they work to dismantle injustice, and i am fortunate to be surrounded by such great role models. the scientific american article, “how to think about implicit bias” reads, “many of us are more biased than we realize” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” scientific american authorsmoreau fye week 7). this quotation is https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ painfully true. luckily, the community at notre dame works to dismantle bias, and i becoming less biased as a result of it. samantha dunlap moreau fye – integration one october 15, 2021 what do i believe? education or degree? this week in my introduction to psychology class, we got a new professor, anré venter. on his first day, he asked our lecture, “are you here for an education or a degree?” it took a little bit for those powerful words to sink in and become meaningful. i pondered on this question for the next few hours, trying to 1) decipher what it truly means and 2) reflect on how i will interpret and answer this question in my coming years at notre dame. to me, a degree in this context means receiving a piece of paper at the end of four years of college with no real self-development, growth, or learning. an education involves hard work, accepting your best for what it is, discovering who you are/what you believe in, and authentically becoming who you want to be. as dr. brown said in the power of vulnerability, “if we all allow ourselves to be the best and most authentic versions of ourselves, what do we have to lose?” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown – moreau fye week one) while it did not take long for me to formulate my answer, i understand that it will not be easy and will involve many failures and successes. but, i will strive to be positively impacted and changed by my notre dame education.  i believe that god exists and that i am continuing to search for him in life every day. during my short time here so far, my relationship with god has improved drastically. living in a place where god is cherished, adored, and accessible, i have found it much easier to grow in my relationship with him. i have started going to mass twice a week, am now a lector and em, read the bible, and actively participate in theology class. all these resources available have allowed me to find the lord, something that would have been difficult and uncommon at home. religion was never spoken about at my public high school, and many people did not believe in or practice any religion. so, being an active catholic was hard for me because i felt alone and like no one could relate. but, at notre dame, i have been continuing to evolve in my faith and explore how meaningful, advantageous, and beautiful it can be. my ongoing relationship with god can be compared to what i spoke about in week four: searching for life-giving relationships and that healthy ones can be achieved through a positive outlook on life, trusting yourself and the lord, and living in the present. (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships,” the red flag campaign – moreau fye week four) i could not be more pleased with how much i have grown so far and hope to continue this upward path with the lord by my side. i believe that living in a community is vital to personal growth. i have felt this way for a while, especially now as i live in the prospering communities of notre dame, lyons hall, club soccer, etc. being present in these groups has emphasized cherishing and loving instead of just tolerating others, something i strongly value. we live in a unique world of diverse humans that can all benefit significantly from one another, but we must be open to acceptance. learning by listening to varying perspectives is essential for understanding how yourself, your peers, and the universe works. here at nd, community is a strong point of emphasis, and i am so grateful that i have the opportunity to live in an inclusive environment.  i also believe that presenting your most authentic self to others is just as essential to the community as accepting others. many are fearful of exhibiting this true version of themselves, but as carla harris said, “fear has no place in your success equation.” i believe that fear is the enemy of progress. if you are timid about something, you will never attack it head-on and therefore not get the most out of it. (“2021 laetare medalist address, carla harris, moreau fye week five) while meeting numerous new people, i continuously attempt to be intentional with my words and actions because that is the biggest form of integrity and honesty. after all, “you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do.” (“where i’m from,” george ella lyon, moreau fye week 6) everyone is special in their own way, and you are only hiding if you do not shine that light. i believe that my purpose is to help others be their best self. in high school, i spent a lot of time working with students with disabilities, and it opened my eyes to how unique everyone can be. it also showed me how vital it is to help people understand that they are worthy and important even when they can’t see it. this expands to people of all kinds. i am hoping to continue this passion through service work in south bend. the media-shaped world we live in today has an alarming and sad impact on how we perceive people different from ourselves. a few negative stories that make the news should not be our idea of an entire place. we need to become much more open-minded and open to finding new possibilities in the world. (“danger of a single story,” chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted, moreau fye week seven). i believe that doing what you love will lead you to the biggest success in life, happiness. the idea of education versus degree is very similar to david brooks’ idea of resume versus eulogy. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two) reflecting on his ted talk, i realized that to grow as my authentic self, i need to participate in activities because i love them. they will ultimately enhance my personal goals and motivations rather than signing up for something because it looks good on a resume. at nd, i am in a bible study group which is an activity that would not go on a resume, but i participate in it simply because it is enjoyable and enables me to grow in my faith. i believe that i am searching to begin my steady path of self-discovery. “the greatest journey you will ever go on is self-discovery.” (“the role of faith in our story, fr. pete mccormick c.s.c., moreau fye week three) self-discovery is a never-ending road to being and finding your most authentic and loving self. that is not always easy and requires patience, but ultimately is a lifelong journey. it is important to remember that life is a journey, not a destination. we should always be looking to improve ourselves and strive for more rather than being satisfied once we reach that original goal or destination. here, i am implementing this belief by exploring different minors, seeking my faith, and spending more time on reflection, looking inward. integration ii conway 1 professor pruitt moreau first-year experience 3 december 2021 i am powerful and have the duty to cultivate that power in others one thing that has definitely solidified for me over the past semester is my sense of self. i believe i have grown both more confident in my abilities as well as more unapologetic in expressing my personality and this is something i am extremely proud of. i have never been the most self-assured person out there, and certainly not the most assertive, but in the last few months i have really grown into myself and become proud to be me. i think a major part of this journey has been changing expectations i have set for myself into goals. in week ix of moreau, we discussed imposter syndrome, the constant fear that sits at the back of our minds that we aren’t good enough. it was something that all, or at least most, of us felt and the solidarity we had in this emotion was comforting to me because it helped to banish the fear that my inadequacy was real. we also discussed how the expectations we set for ourselves can be so damaging to our sense of self-worth because they represent an unreachable minimum. we base our value off of arbitrary standards set with the assumption of perfection and feel awful when we can’t live up to them. we “believe [we] must be perfect and that [we] must live up to the expectations of others” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). especially during the college application process i felt the pressure to succeed, not necessarily because i wanted to get into the best school i could, but because if i didn’t get into the best school i would be letting everyone, including myself, down. i came to realize that this is unhealthy and have since changed my mindset. now, i set goals for myself on https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau conway 2 the basis of my own capabilities because i am very much capable and no fear of failure to meet arbitrary standards will prevent me from realizing that. through moreau discussions, meeting new people here, and classes this semester, i have become the most confident i have ever been. i truly believe that coming to notre dame was the catalyst for my mental switch from expectiations to goals because, out of all the colleges i applied to, this was my goal and my success. in a sense, i really do feel like i won because not only am i attending the school i wanted to be at, but i am thriving more than i had ever imagined i could here. since i now have clarity in my sense of self and a newfound confidence in the present me, i can more properly engage in hope for the future. in week xii, we talked about hope and the power it has as a mindset. we also discussed what the source of hope is in our lives, whether it is religious, internally motivated, or goal based. what has solidified for me, both through these discussions and through personal reflection, is that hope rests within oneself. life is “a series of troughs and peaks” and we must understand and appreciate the balance (“the screw tape letters chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i believe that hope is manifested through goals and sustained through satisfaction of the present. in other words, being excited for the future and striving for the next big thing is healthy and a driving force in life, but it should also be backed by recognition of past goals that have been met. for example, i recently finished a book, cloud cuckoo land by anthony doerr. i had been wanting to read it ever since it came out because i absolutely loved all the light we cannot see and wanted to experience another doerr novel. though, the book was long and school is tough so it took me ages to read and, despite it being fabulously written with a wonderful story, i was frustrated i couldn’t get through it. over thanksgiving break i finished it, simple as that, and i am proud of myself for it. it was one small thing i had hoped to do and i did it, and since i am grounded in that little satisfaction i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625?module_item_id=107420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625?module_item_id=107420 conway 3 have the strength to prepare myself for greater hopes in the future. by encountering inner dissonance and pondering on hope, i have solidified in my mind my own power and this has transformed my self-image for the better. though, not only is it important for me to recognize my own capabilities, but i also have a duty to use this power to support and promote the individuality of others. while the world is filled with so many good, kind, and considerate people, there is still a dire need for improvement in society, especially in the area of diversity and inclusion. right now, society is especially struggling with lasting prejudice, biases, and unjust treatment. father john jenkins states that “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” and, moreover, as we discussed in weeks x and xi of moreau, diversity is crucial to a well-functioning, healthy society (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). diversity is the catalyst for personal growth and group improvement because the more opinions and perspectives we are exposed to, the more comprehensive our understanding can become. in class, we discovered that our hometowns had a wide range of diversity and mine, admittedly, didn’t have much. although i went to public school for most of my life, i went to an all-girls catholic high school in northern new jersey in which there was very little diversity. this being said, my school’s inclusion policies and diversity programs, for example diversity training for the teachers, were extremely minimal. they emphasize our shared commonalities at the expense of our differences and, though many current and former students including myself are trying to change this, progress is slow. this being said, it is so crucial to respect individuality because “every story is a testament of personal truth and each must be heard as part of the larger story” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven). individuals make up communities and it https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ conway 4 is the diversity of those individuals which make the societies so wonderful. here at notre dame, i get to experience more diversity than i ever have before and i am beyond grateful for the opportunity to grow in my perspective and share in life with so many people. now that my own sense of self is clarified to me, i can be that much more ready to engage with others in a meaningful way, contributing what i know and learning from friends, classmates, and peers. moreau integration 15 october 2021 aesthetics and aspirations of the everyday to feel loved, believe you deserve love. brene brown said that “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). through dr. brown’s years of extensive research, she discovered that the answer to feeling a connection or a sense of community boiled down to feeling worthy of it. the more one aims to be perfect, the more he undermines his ability to feel self-confident. those who trusted in their self-worth possess the courage to not only be imperfect but also to act compassionately towards others. her advice offers comfort to me because i lost a huge sense of community when coming to college. initially, i knew nobody on campus, and that frightened me for the longest time. although i was shy at first, after becoming more vulnerable and believing in my inherent value, i was able to make great friends in no time and now consider notre dame as one of my homes. this isn’t to say that i don’t miss living in guam, where i’m from. george lyon in her poem wrote, “i am from those moments”, and i couldn’t agree more (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). my experiences in guam have shaped me to be the person i am today, so i can’t and won’t ever forget the impact i’ve had growing up there. my identity is tied to guam, so taking the time to remember that relaxes me and helps me open up to others a bit more. there are still times when i still find it hard to become vulnerable around others, and many times i find myself hesitating in fear of failure. however, david brooks provided me hope when he said, “you have to surrender to something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). david brooks explains that to truly grow with self-confidence, one must allow themselves to be vulnerable to someone or something out of their control. many people struggle in mustering up their self-confidence which leads to them preventing themselves from being vulnerable to other people. as a result, they have fewer connections with others which leads to further diminished self-confidence. this cycle continues and can often worsen as time goes by. i experience this when around a crowd of people who seem to all know each other so well. therefore, i sometimes leap of faith to allow myself to be vulnerable and in turn grow and develop internal resilience and confidence. although i haven’t experienced a toxic relationship yet, i’ve become better prepared to properly handle one. the one love foundation made a video where they continually repeat the phrase “because i love you” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four). even though i’m looking to make new relationships at every turn, i also must take great caution in ensuring that i carefully pick the right crowd to hang out with. this sometimes leads me to overthink social interactions. there are some days when i feel very self-confident, and unfortunately, there are also other days when i feel lonely and uncertain about myself. i need to keep jumping into an opportunity without hesitation to truly grow and sustain confidence in myself. i also often find myself a bit judgmental, so i have been working on being completely open-minded and vulnerable to others. i also hope to love others openly so that i can experience the best relationships with https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g them. father kevin sums it up by saying, “that we cannot love the god whom we do not see, if we don’t love the brother whom we do see” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). father kevin draws our attention to the connection between how we act and how we think. man was made in the image of god, so by extension, every person we see and interact with should remind us that we are all children of god. on wednesday during lunch, i saw someone sitting by themselves at the dining hall, so i decided to sit next to him. we ended up having a great conversation about our life plans as we were both pre-med students. what was even more interesting is that lukash, the student i met, was a senior with 8 weeks left of school. he was talking to me about how he found friends in his dorm, knott, with who he was able to have deep and meaningful conversations with which helped him grow as a person. i was admittedly a bit overwhelmed by this because he seemed to have his whole life figured out which pressured me a bit to do the same. i realized though that life journeys, whether physical or spiritual, shouldn’t be rushed. i do identify as a catholic; however, i don’t believe that i’m as devout as i could be. this concerns me because i see this unwavering peace and confidence in people who have traveled much further in their faith journeys than i have. it’s sometimes troubling to wonder whether my journey has even taken off yet. father pete’s words can be applied to comfort me: “take another look…first, be patient. if you’re in a hurry faith becomes so much harder to understand. second, each faith journey is unique…third, remain hopeful” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). now i know to be patient and am confident that i will find my way on my journey. unfortunately, there have been moments where i’ve hit obstacles during my life journey. a sophomore recently told me about a story last year at our dorm involving race wars. he made it seem as if this was a big deal and that the tension permeated even into this year. at first, i was immediately concerned and even believed him for a bit, but then i saw chimamanda’s video where she said, “stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). this is when i realized i only heard one account of the incident and made incorrect judgments based on that one story. i later verified with his roommates who clarified that there was an altercation between two people last year that didn’t extend to their races or anyone else. i felt foolish for believing patrick’s words without guessing that he heavily embellished his tale. this helped remind me to stay more vigilant and aware of the stories i hear which also helps me to use stories for the better. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration 1 cashel o’connor father kevin integration one 12 october 2021 beliefs: the path to self-actualization prompt: what do i believe? what do i believe? four unostentatious, commonplace words and yet my mind teems with an abundance of thoughts on them. “root beliefs,” as the instructions define them, are “statements of conviction” that shape my “choices and priorities” in life. belief, as heather from week 3 defines it, is simply, “the way individuals come to know god.” with respect to this definition, i will show you how i strive to know god. this seems like a lot to unpack; however, i have decided to present my “root beliefs” in a concise and easily-digestible manner. since these “i believe that…” statements are, in a sense, dimunitions of the motivations, aspirations, truths, and stimuli that drive me in life, i have elected to present them first as objective statements and then expound upon them on whatever path my mind elects to take as it attempts to do these pseudo-ineffable concepts justice. it appears it is time to cross the rubicon and begin my conquest of the root beliefs; let us begin. firstly, a statement of conviction to bolster my “ethos” as i commence my campaign on these complicated concepts: i believe that root beliefs are essential in my quest for self-actualization. simply put, in order to self-actualize, an intransitive verb meaning “to realize fully one's true potential” (merriam webster), i must explicitly define my beliefs. moving forward, these objective beliefs will serve as cornerstones, foundations if you will, as i go about realizing my full potential. at the end of my journey to self-actualization, i see myself as a vintager in the vineyard of my mind: happily harvesting the sweet, succulent fruits of my labor as i reflect blissfully on the journey of self-actualization i have just completed. yes, this ideology is mildly utopian i intended it to be so. a critical idea in week 7 of moreau was the question “how do i pursue the truth?” to be frank, this question stumped me. thankfully, in week 6 i learned about implicit bias extensively. one memorable quote from that week is the following: “stories matter. many stories matter.” specifically, i realized the benefit of hearing or seeking out more than one story about a singular topic. logically, from this quote i determined that the best way to pursue the truth was to seek out more than one story. thankfully, with these root beliefs i hope to provide you with several different, disticint, and unique beliefs (stories). however, all that glitters is not gold. in other words, to quote week 2, “you have to give to receive.” in this sense, i give you my thoughts so that you can, hopefully, glean something meaningful from them this is about you understanding what motivates me as much as it is about me understanding what motivates me. together we will see what motivates me to strive for self-actualization my glorious purpose. to conclude, in this first “i believe that…” statement i have revealed, to draw on my finance major, the bullish case for my future: self-actualization. rightly so, this sanguine dream has a worthy adversary: the draconian (bearish) case. i believe that i am inherently flawed. simply see my poem from week 6 miniscule in magnitude compared to the masterpieces of my classmates. clearly, my abilities as a human are restricted and the possibilities of what i can achieve in this meager life are inherently limited. i am fenced in, restrained thus is human nature. conceding that i am imperfect; however, is the perfect way to address my inherent imperfections. my usem class read and discussed genesis; many of my peer’s interpretations differed from my own. this is not to say that they were wrong and i was right, or that i was wrong and they were right. on the contrary, the discussion opened my eyes to what it means to have differing perspectives on the same topic. in week 1, the focus question was, “in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?” in her commentary, dr. brown pointed out that we, “cannot selectively numb emotion.” the ideas of emotion and vulnerability stood out and still stand out to me the most. in my eyes, emotions are what make us imperfect. however, emotions are also what make us human. to understand this duality we must become vulnerable, accept that we are flawed, and appreciate our nature. by introducing this second “i believe that..” statement, i have purposely discredited the first “i believe that… statement” to a degree these conflicting hypotheses each show one side of a wide spectrum. now, with my next statement, i hope to show where my beliefs lie on the spectrum i have created. alas, how can i hope to achieve self-actualization if i am inherently flawed; how can i fulfill my potential if i am confined by preconceived limits? the answer i have come to is a simple one: i believe that the only thing that defines me is the amount i apply myself. to quote my qqc response from week 4, “life is not always perfect.” honestly speaking, i was a floater in high school. rarely did i apply myself and i regret it immensely. reflecting on my highschool accomplishments, i am not filled with pride or the satisfaction of a job well done, but instead a sense of regret as i think of what could have been. you see, i have come to realize in my short time here at notre dame the joys of applying myself. throwing myself into my work and emerging with a sense of satiety is a new, beloved passion of mine. that is largely the reason why i decided to write this paper in the way i did with all the big words and stuff i wanted to imitate the style, syntax and vocabulary of the readings i do for class to challenge myself (omitted the oxford comma there, felt kind of strange but i figured why remain in my comfort zone after coming this far). being inherently flawed, it makes sense that the scope and scale of this paper are limited extremely limited. this applies to my potential as well; however, if i apply myself on my quest for self-actualization similarly to how i have applied myself on this paper i believe that everything will fall into place. that isn’t intended as some egotistical celebration of this paper, but rather as an acknowledgement that i am embarking on a challenging process both by writing this paper and by aiming for self-actualization. the only metric by which i can hope to measure my progress on this odyssey is application: if i applied myself and gave it my all, i grant myself the right to be content. after a quick re-read, i am content with what i have produced, i just wish i had more time and more words. however, i also have a sense of apprehension about what i have created; i think that, given more time, i would be able to produce a more comprehensive and thorough belief statement. i implore you to view this, financially speaking, as a balance sheet a snapshot in time. the income statement will come later, perhaps on the next integration. to reiterate, i believe that root beliefs are essential in my quest for self-actualization, that i am inherently flawed, and that the only thing that defines me is the amount i apply myself. the spectrum has been defined and the measurement stipulated the onus is mine to bear moving forward. earnestly peering into the future, i see myself achieving self-actualization, satisfied and content like thanos in the garden (avengers endgame). i aspire to be as content as father soren in week 5: “i love the work of the brothers, as much, i think, as one can love it.” yes, right now i am, as the joker said, “like a dog chasing cars… wouldn’t know what to do if i caught one.” however, soon i will be next to thanos in the garden, fulfilled and sated… however, i petition you to remember, rome wasn’t built in a day. integration 2 integration 2 due 12/3/21 the perpetual rollercoaster called life there is a common saying heard by almost every freshman college student in america, going along the lines of “you don’t have to have your life figured out by eighteen years old”. ironically, this statement always seems to be met with great skepticism. i have always thought to myself, “well yes, but i personally will know exactly what i want to do. i will be an exception.” yet as i look back on my first semester of college, i realize that i am far from an exception and have absolutely no idea what the future holds for me. i have had to ask important questions such as what my true passions are, i have found clarity in terms of worrying over grades, and i have realized that the intricate balance between work ethic and social life is much more complicated than i thought. while my life may be full of ups and downs, peaks and valleys, my experiences have led to a greater personal understanding and a clearer awareness on how to approach my future endeavors. i have had to ask many important questions this semester, specifically where my true passions lie and what that can mean for my future career. i would be lying if i said i didn’t experience an existential crisis of sorts halfway through the semester. there i was, sitting in the middle of hesburgh library, realizing that i really didn’t want to go to medical school. logically, i began to think of the other career paths that a neuroscience and behavior degree could lead to, and the panic set in even more. how does one balance enjoying a field of study with the important logistics of earnings and quality of work environment? part of me felt like i was giving up on myself, and i will admit i felt pretty disappointed in myself. however, it also made me think about our discussion over imposter syndrome and how we need to take it easy on ourselves. “we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). fast forward to the present, i have switched to the science business major and am very excited to see where it will take me in the future. some of the most interesting and upstanding people i have met on campus so far are associated with various business ventures, and i look forward to being able to combine my skillsets with my genuine science interests. i am far from understanding what i want to do with my life, but i realize that even figuring out what i definitely do not want to do is a step in the right direction. so no, i do not have my life figured out whatsoever; and that is more than ok. i have found clarity in terms of worrying over grades and academic standing. all throughout high school i was determined, obsessive even, to consistently be one of the top performers with the highest grades. i convinced myself that i wouldn’t get into any colleges or eventually have a good job if i wasn’t the best of the best. while i do think it was good to have high standards for myself, the extent to which i took it was simply not healthy. i would be so disappointed in myself if i got anything below a 90%, sometimes letting it ruin my entire day. coming to notre dame, i realized that i lie within an amazing group of students, and i wasn’t exactly sure how i would feel about no longer consistently being at the top of my class. to my pleasant surprise, i have actually felt quite at peace with my current grades. they aren’t perfect by any means, but i am very happy with them given that i am at a top twenty school in the country and it is my first semester of college. i know that there will be times here where things aren’t going so well, but i will remind myself that the good always alternates with the bad, just like what we talked about during week 12. “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106146 and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty” ( “the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). there is still a long way to go, but the ambiguity and constant uncertainty i anticipated to feel over academic standing here simply does not exist. i am both content and calm about how i am doing, i simply cannot ask for anything more than that. balancing social life and school has turned out to be much more difficult and nuanced than expected. on one hand, such a problem is not the worst thing in the world to have. i have made some of the strongest relationships with my friends on campus, whether that be people from my dorm or individuals i have met in class. i remember thinking to myself “i am having so much fun here, i almost forget that i am here for school”. it is so easy to get caught up in all that our campus has to offer that weekends go by in the blink of an eye. i have gone from waking up at dawn for game days to having it be midnight on sunday night, all the while having done absolutely no schoolwork. i realize that these kinds of habits cannot continue, especially once my schedule becomes more rigorous and my extracurriculars begin to pile up. in an interesting but albeit counterintuitive way, my dilemma reminds me of our discussions during week 11. “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week 11). while i believe that i have done a very good job in building communities in various shapes and sizes, i think it is important to hone in the individual aspect of it. i can maintain these relationships while rejuvenating my work ethic, as long as i remember that it is up to me on an individual level. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106234 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106234 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106210 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106210 this past semester has turned out to be one of the most illuminating periods of growth in my life, both through amazing experiences and tough lessons. whether it be through vulnerable discussion in moreau or late night study sessions with my closest friends, i have truly encountered a full spectrum of experiences at notre dame. i can’t help but look forward to how i will continue to grow and develop next semester, and there is no other place i would rather do it than with professor taylor at 3:30 on tuesdays. what i encountered and how will i respond my perspective of life, how was it challenged coming to notre dame, how has this helped me grown and develop. i came to notre dame aware that my life would change i was embarking into a new journey on a new challenge and at a place far from home: i was stepping out of my comfort zone. before coming i already dreamt about the 4 years that were yet to come. i looked at my options for college and already contemplated what would be of my life in each place. i saw notre dame as the best fit being an academically challenging institution, with a great community and campus. i was aware that i would face challenges though i was unfamiliar of their nature. once at campus i perceived those challenges to be mostly physical relying on situations such as room size, food availability and even the dining period which is way earlier than any brazilian is accustomed to. though my biggest fear was of the winter period which i knew was harsh in south bend. what presented itself as the true challenge were the challenges which were invisible to the naked eye. for the first time in my life, i struggled with mental health something which i had never even occurred to me before leaving home. i believe that this is because i was away of the warmth and comfort of my home and family which helped me be at peace. the biggest challenge embedded with this were the consequences of the rupture of my friend group which due to a petty disagreement there was a rupture. the breakup of the group was very hard for me, and i struggled with issues i had never experienced before. though it was through this tough time which i was able to learn about life and how i see it through a way i never dreamt was possible. as an extroverted person i never thought that i would learn so much by being alone. in one of the toughest moments of my lifetime where i struggled with issues i had never experienced before i learned more about myself than i could have ever imagined. it was in the darkness where i found light. as demonstrated in week 10’s commentary[footnoteref:1] conveying the art of self-love, it is through the “good, the bad and the ugly” through which we learn the most. [1: video: “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto) moreau fye week 10 ] the whole situation opened my eyes and showed me how nothing is perfect bringing me down to the ‘real world’ and out of the utopia i perceived college to be. when i began my journey in college it all seemed like it was perfect and flawless, i felt like it was flawless. everything flowed naturally – life was colorful though in reality it was black and white. i was completely unaware of the multifaceted challenges which i will encounter in the future and in most ways still am, though i now have a ‘taste’ of what the ‘real world’ will throw at me. the consequence of the turmoil was that i reconnected with friendships which i had made during my first weeks yet never developed them as i spent most of my time with my previous friend group. i spent more time with my dorm and by doing so i regained some of the dorm spirit which i had lost since welcome week. spending more times with other individuals allowed me to experience more the american culture and thus properly delve into the american college experience, as my previous group relied mostly on members from the latinx community. evidence[footnoteref:2] from week 11 demonstrated one “should be more curious and not treat other people like an alien if we’re not american”. as a non-american i felt particularly connected to this as i did not feel like an alien even though i came from a completely different culture then most people here. [2: video: “with voices true snapshot summary” (klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11 ] i felt especially welcomed in my dorm community, and in particular my section known as sh*t alley because of various tiny rooms being fit together into a small corridor with inferior infrastructure in comparison to the rest of the dorm. this all led to a tight nit community which i am more grateful for now more than i had ever been before. living with people, friends, who struggle through many similar issues helps me put into perspective the effort that we all require collectively to push through college. spending more time with them taught me more about living life in the moment, focusing more on the present. this ideology was freeing as it unshackled me of some of the toxicity that revolved around my previous friend group. in week 9 we explored several concepts regarding living in college one of the key issues were expectations. an article by julia hogan[footnoteref:3] said that “expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” what hogan has to say helped me reflect and think about my time here. college is full of expectations which are empowered by toxicity, as much as it hurt, the rupture of my previous friend group is allowing me to settle within a healthier environment, and as long as i have hope i believe it will be beneficial for me in the long run. [3: text: "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" (julia hogan, grotto) moreau fye 9 ] what i learned the most over this semester was the importance of hope. ever since i was a child, i heard the brazilian expression that “hope is the last thing that dies” – meaning that when there is nothing, there still is hope. i always heard this saying, but it was only till i spent a semester here that i truly understood it. in week 12[footnoteref:4] in a letter by c.s lewis we are shown how the “devil is liar” but at the same time he displays that the angel isn’t always perfect either. this led me to reflect and think about how nothing is perfect, and the only thing that is flawless is hope. hope is always beneficial no matter what, it doesn’t evoke harm and it is what helps fuel my day-to-day life at notre dame. even through hard times i am truly grateful for my time at notre dame and will for sure continue to me over the next 7 semester semesters and for the rest of my life. i am learning more than any textbook could teach me, growing as a person and being forced to mature. dealing with issues regarding mental health brought to light a new perspective and i now see life differently; i now truly comprehend that hope is incremental in my life and it is through positivity and an open mind that i can uplift myself and others in situations of disdain. [4: brief introduction to the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis.pdf moreau fye week 12 ] integration #1 williams 1 moreau first year experience bryan reaume 15 october 2021 why i get out of bed every morning i struggled with starting the integration assignment because of how difficult it has been for me to identify my root beliefs. when i was still a high school student, i refused to share my personal beliefs and experiences with others. i felt like i could ruin either current or future relationships by leaning too heavily into beliefs that might be disagreeable to others. the fear of losing out on those relationships forced me to adopt a fake persona. i would change my personality around people so that i never risked coming across as different from them. the idea of pleasing everyone in my life made me a robot in some ways. i started to lose that internal sense of happiness that comes with understanding your core beliefs. waking up this morning just to sluggishly walk to my chemical principles exam finally motivated me to start the integration. even though i am a tired college student who could easily stop the alarm button and continue sleeping, i make the decision every time to get out of bed and go live the life that i have worked so hard to achieve. realizing the significance of that decision and how it connects back to my life is what enlightened me to my root beliefs. as i start to appreciate the person that is derick williams, i believe that growth is a continuous journey, that i can live loudly by being who i am, and that i have the power to help others discover themselves. i believe that growth is a continuous process that is never meant to end. it has taken me twenty years of life to even catch a small glimpse of the person that i am and understand the person that i am becoming. since we are never meant to be perfect in our current state, we williams 2 should appreciate the chance we have to continually grow. too many in society today feel like we must illustrate a model of perfection. the idea that we must be perfect also encourages people to believe that they have reached the end of their growth. when faced with such a dilemma, “what keeps us from connection is feeling like we are unworthy of that connection” (brown moreau fye week #1). since we are never done growing, people who seek perfection will constantly feel like they are unworthy of connecting with others who may be at different levels of growth. perfection is an untenable state of being that prevents us from enjoying the journey ahead of us. developing as a person and being open to experiences that will teach us important life lessons is the way that we lean into who we are as humans. moving forward, i will appreciate my future growth by not allowing myself to fall prey to society’s images of perfection. chimamanda ngozi adichie puts it best when she shares “how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of stories” (adichie moreau fye week #7). the more and more we fill our lives with fake images of success, the further and further we allow stories of perfection to dictate our lives. i believe that my life will be much richer and more rewarding by continually growing. more than just growing as a person, i believe that i can live loudly by being who i am. like i mentioned before, i was scared to admit my personal beliefs and experiences because they made me different from my peers. i have gone almost my entire life neglecting to share what i enjoy about life so that i could more easily fit into what other people enjoyed. when diving into the toxic signs of friendship, i lived in constant fear of what others might say about me. it took me leaving my hometown to finally realize that “if you can’t trust someone to speak kindly of you when you’re not around, it’s usually best to leave this friendship behind entirely” (taylor moreau fye week #4). discovering a new world of people at college that are wanting to explore their ideas and passions has encouraged me to do the same. i feel comfortable in a setting like williams 3 notre dame to finally share my love for vintage photography and talk with other people about electric cars and renewable energy. back in my small part of indiana, no one understood why i would be excited about such things. here at college, my peers have given me constant encouragement to be who i am and lean into these hobbies. moving forward, i want to make sure that i don’t allow my surface-level accomplishments to overtake my personal hobbies. people seem to forget that “our lives are not our resumes” (grove moreau fye week #5). it’s okay to be proud of your academic and leadership achievements. at the same time, i know that i can connect to other people on a much deeper level when i express the personal pride i have in my unique talents and hobbies. after accepting the importance of growth and living loudly through my personal hobbies, i believe that i have the power to help others discover themselves. in some ways, i see helping others as my personal mission in life. after struggling for so long to find myself, i have such a powerful message to share with others. as someone who relies heavily on the teachings of my parents and grandparents, it can be extremely impactful to learn about life from those who have been through similar experiences. when describing the poem about her own life, george ella lyon put it best when she said that “it’s life beyond my notebook is a testimony to the power of poetry, of roots, and of teachers” (lyon moreau fye week #6). the most effective way that we can discover more about ourselves is by helping others to discover themselves. the journey of self-discovering and self-understanding is one that can be walked together. so many people have struggled with the same issues that i have over the past several years. by sharing my roots and experiences, i can provide hope and encouragement to the people who think it is impossible to be themselves. a big issue we face as people is that “we live in a constant battle between external success and internal value” (brooks moreau fye week #2). we constantly find new titles and williams 4 shiny awards to fill a need for external success. the constant pursuit for success causes us to forget how much value is held internally through our roots, passions, and beliefs. through my own hardships and the valuable lessons learned from those experiences, i can provide a guiding hand to those struggling to find their own meaning in life. my root beliefs are what give me hope and belonging in life. the more i understand the value of being myself, the more i will appreciate the things that make me . no one can be just like you and that gives us power as individuals. everytime i decide to get up in the morning and go about my day, i remember what it is that has driven me to make that decision. i believe that i am not done growing, so i face the day looking for new opportunities. i believe that i can live loudly, so i lean into the hobbies that fill my life with joy and comfort. i believe that i have a mission to help others, so i share my personal struggles to provide a guiding light of encouragement. after coming to college and appreciating the person i am growing into, i am genuinely excited to see what the future holds for me. whether it's a meaningful career or simply a job that takes care of my basic needs, i hope to achieve a sense of personal satisfaction knowing that i have walked into my future as who i truly am. fr. pete mccormick explains it beautifully when he says that “regardless of our misfires, we are called to a life of courage” (mccormick moreau fye week #3). no matter how much i have failed in the past to be myself, i leave that bed every morning with the chance to lead a life made beautiful by who i am. i look forward to living that life out in action. williams 5 works cited adichie, chimamanda ngozi. “the danger of the single story.” ted conferences, july 2009, https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story #t-1119772. accessed 30 september 2021. moreau fye week seven. brooks, david. “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” youtube, tedx talks, 14 april 2014, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=301s. moreau fye week two. brown, brene. “the power of vulnerability” youtube, tedx talks, 6 october 2010, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0. moreau fye week one. grove, fr. kevin. “two notre dames: your holy cross education.” university of notre dame, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4e b4-a1c1-d0a45c429187. accessed 16 september, 2021. moreau fye week five. lyon, george ella. “where i’m from, a poem.” george ella lyon: writer & teacher, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html. accessed 23 september, 2021. moreau fye week six. mccormick, fr. pete. “the role of faith in our story” youtube videos, university of notre dame campus ministry, 8 february 2021, https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois. moreau fye week three. taylor, olivia. “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship.” grotto, https://grottonetwork.com /navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/. accessed 8 september, 2021. moreau fye week four. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story#t-1119772 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story#t-1119772 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=301s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ mullery theo helm moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 understanding the battle as i have navigated the second half of my first semester here at notre dame, i feel like i have undergone self reflection and learned about myself to a much greater extent than i did during the first part of the year. although that was obviously also a huge growth period, looking back on it now, i think that stage was more so just adjusting to a new environment (or, as i have heard classmates call it, a “fever dream”). in the last month and a half, since coming back from fall break, i think the reality of college has really shown itself and i’ve had to ask myself a lot of big questions about who i am and who i want myself to be. there’s no more of the sunshine and rainbows of the first couple weeks with meeting people and instantly being best friends, no more class material you can just coast through because you learned it in high school, no more no consequence decisions because you’re new here. this is what i mean when i say the reality of college has set in: it’s not all just hanging out with your friends whenever and always having a good time. i realize this is somewhat of a grim outlook, and that’s not to say i haven’t loved everything about being here so far, but i really do believe that it took a little bit (at least for me) to truly understand what i was getting myself into. with all of that being said, i now want to move into connecting some personal experiences of mine lately to what we have been discussing in our last few weeks of classes. to start, a line from emery bergmann’s article in week 9: “i decided to focus on my disappointment with the early weeks of college: how i couldn’t get past superficial conversation, how i couldn’t seem to enjoy parties, feel comfortable on campus, or just meet people who i wanted to spend more time around. i felt so lost and beyond confused” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). although i don’t think my experiences align with everything in this quotation, i definitely agree with some of the things that were mentioned. the part about superficial conversations really hits home; i feel like when i talk to people i just have a “script” in mind of saying my dorm, where i’m from, and my major and don’t know how to get past that. and also lately, i feel like i would definitely put myself in the “couldn’t seem to enjoy parties” category. i had kind of a strange experience at a party on halloween where i looked at what i was doing from the outside and really thought about whether i was having a good time. at that point, it seemed so stupid to me that i had gone to some crowded off campus house just to drink and struggle to make any real connections with people. since then, i haven’t really gone to any parties like that because i know it isn’t what i really enjoy doing. on a somewhat similar note with how community isn’t always easy to develop or fit into, i’d like to move to an excerpt from parker j. palmer’s article in week 11: “hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i think this quotation sums up my time here in the last month or so really well. more so than ever before, i have been asking myself who i want to become and how i am going to reach that goal. that has involved a lot of looking at the people i surround myself with, how i spend my time, and what really matters to me deep down. it’s definitely been difficult doing this: in my reflection on these questions, i’ve noticed that most of the people that i’m close with don’t really have the same moral convictions that i do and sometimes do things i have no interest in doing (like going way overboard with drinking and partying). as a result, i have not exactly tried to distance myself from them, but more so just keep a balance where i enjoy my time hanging out with them while also not staying for most parts that would put me in an uncomfortable situation. like i said before, this has been tough, but i’ve also gotten a lot closer to some people across campus with similar beliefs and values. as palmer says, the hard experience of realizing i needed to expand my group of friends has led to me really feeling involved and welcomed in this community. again on the topic of how community can sometimes have its ups and downs, i’ll turn to father jenkins in the week 10 module: “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other. each side has never been more eager yet more unable to dominate the other. both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c). it’s crazy to think that father jenkins gave this address almost 10 years ago, considering how applicable it is to today. everyone within america (and really the entire world) needs to do a better job of not villainizing everyone with views contrary to theirs. before coming here, i was honestly really scared that people would constantly be talking about their political views and beating up on each other when they disagreed-i feel like this is a common stereotype about college. i’ve been pleasantly surprised that they have not been brought up more, and when they are, people are generally pretty respectful and just want to understand the other person’s beliefs. it seems as though many people need to try to imitate the example that we have set here (and hopefully many other places have too). lastly, i’d like to talk about hope going forward and the need to reach out to others for strength. this especially came up in our week 12 module: “christians spread hope, and religious, like those in holy cross, have a special obligation to embolden others to pick up their crosses. yet we too draw strength from the family spirit in our institutions and are better disciples when humble enough to admit that we have a lot to learn from students and co-workers of all ages” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c.). this quotation captures a virtue that many of us need to strive for more: humility. it’s very easy to think that you know everything and never turn to those around you for help, but it is often during those times that you learn the most. especially here, where everyone is so gifted and has already done so much to come into their own, it’s very hard to admit you don’t have it all figured out. for me personally, i think having this level of knowledge in the community can sometimes be a double edged sword. on one hand, if you are willing to accept that you have more to learn, there are always people to help, but on the other, the very act of doing that can be difficult because you don’t want to be perceived as less than others. another thing i gathered from the readings in this particular week was a quality about hope that is fairly unique: it is always present, no matter what. especially while i was going through the “screwtape letters,” this thought was in my mind. screwtape kept talking about how he and the other demons would try to get people to come to their side in their lowest moments, or “troughs.” some, though, even after experiencing what many could not even imagine, hold strong and keep the faith. they believe that things will get better; they have hope that there is a plan for them and they will get through whatever it is they are going through. this is my sincere hope as i continue my journey at notre dame and beyond: always have hope and know that things will work out in some way because i have god on my side. my meaningful encounters encountering new things is the very essence of how a person changes. i wouldn’t say that i have changed a lot on a moral level, if at all, since coming to notre dame. however, my perspective has definitely been something that has changed since i last was in school, my junior year of high school. one thing i have encountered here at notre dame that has changed my perspective is that there is far more diversity here in this community than there was at my highschool and in my hometown. where i’m from it is predominantly a white and asian area. here at notre dame there is far more diversity and i have appreciated new experiences with people of color and people who are of latino descent. the interesting thing about me saying notre dame is diverse, is it truly isn’t. we only have 5% of an african american student body. however, coming from a school of 2500 with 5 kids who are african american, it is definitely better for me to have encountered more experiences and perspectives. one quote that resonated with me was from week nine regarding the idea of imposter syndrome. this really opened my eyes because as i said, i have experienced far more minorities since coming to school than i had before. while i personally have not ever felt descrimination, the following quote i encountered made me think about the possible insecurities that people who do experience discrimination may feel. while talking about the feeling of being an imposter, elizabeth cox says “there is often no level of accomplishment that puts these feelings to rest” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). this quote makes me wonder how demeaning someone would have to be toward someone else in order for someone to feel as if they can’t do anything in their life to become worthy. it hurts me, and i am glad that i now have more friends who are minorities who know that there are good and caring people out there. while also on the topic of race/minorities, i have encountered more catholic people who have very similar beliefs to me here at notre dame than i had ever before in my life. i had never gone to catholic school even though i am a practicing catholic. being around and learning about catholic values in school has been interesting. when it comes to my encounters, i was intrigued when i read our week ten module, specifically a quotes which stated “catholic social teaching demands that we teach students what racism is and why and how to oppose it” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory” by christopher devron moreau fye week 10). i was particularly interested when i encountered this quote because there is a stigma attached to christians of all kinds that we discriminate and use the bible to do so. in reality, i find this to be extremely untrue. this quote alone acts in support. it is clear to me that as a christian and more specifically a catholic, we have been taught to love our neighbor growing up. with that being said, as i mentioned before it is inevitable to encounter people who believe that catholics just love to discriminate when it is convenient for them. i have not encountered anyone like this, and if i ever did, i would respond by having a very focused and stern but respectful conversation about why that is not okay. after all, jesus teaches us to love our neighbor, not discourage them. as i previously mentioned, this is the first catholic school i have been to. my hometown is definitely predominantly christian, but we have a very large jewish population also. the majority of my highschool friends who i was closest with are jewish. i bring this up because i have yet to be a part of a catholic community. in coming to notre dame, this changed completely as i am happy that tons of people here share my faith. this new community i have encountered has done wonders for me and my faith, but it is definitely something i have been cognizant to not become too reliant on. the quote from parker palmer in week 11 captures this idea perfectly as he says “the most common connotation of the word “community” in our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week 11). i can truly relate to this because while i want to know everyone who i have become close with, it has been important for me to set boundaries. even though i get along and share a lot of values with them, it's important to not completely fall in love with the idea of a group of people who believe the same things. i do believe that hanging around people who only believe the same things as you is dangerous. while i am happy to have encountered plenty of catholics who believe tons of things i do, i have responded by knowing that it's still important to hear other people's viewpoints and ideas on any idea that can be disputed. the last thing that i want to focus on from my encounters stems from week 12 of our class. i am not lying one bit when i say that once i encountered this quote, it has stuck with me. this quote took me a long while to fully understand. the quote is one from c.s. lewis and it states “humans are amphibians--half spirit and half animal” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). this quote is so interesting to me because i had never encountered this kind of thought. while we are taught from a young age that even when we die our spirits live on, i never really believed that my physical body was my spirit. i believed my spirit was more of my consciousness or my mind, and not something physical. c.s. lewis offers an interesting idea that maybe our bodies are mixed with our spirits and we potentially aren’t mammals, but amphibians. i can’t say that i have totally bought into this idea and everything that comes with it, but it is interesting and i am glad to have encountered it. integration one mullery 1 theo helm moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 my journey of self-reflection in the first two months that i’ve been here, i feel like i have learned so much more about myself and the way i think than i could’ve possibly imagined. the combination of being independent from parents, having to take responsibility for what i do in all actions, and balancing everything else that comes with school has caused me to reflect on myself in so many different ways. and although this hasn’t been an entirely easy journey so far, i’m glad to be on it-part of life is the struggle, and i truly believe that i am a better person for it. now, with this increased self-knowledge, i am able to solidify my true beliefs and how i have come about those beliefs. to start, i believe that everyone needs to have the ability to be completely honest and vulnerable with themselves at the very least, and oftentimes with other people as long as they trust them. as brené brown says, “you can't numb those hard feelings without numbing the other effects, or emotions. you cannot selectively numb. so when we numb those, we numb joy, we numb gratitude, we numb happiness. and then, we are miserable, and we are looking for purpose and meaning, and then we feel vulnerable, so then we have a couple beers and a banana nut muffin. and it becomes this dangerous cycle” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). i really love this quotation from dr. brown because it shows how important it is for us to stay in touch with all of our emotions, not just the good ones. often people (myself included) fall into the trap of sulking in their bad emotions, but equally as bad can be trying to deny when something is wrong. obviously being positive for the most part is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 mullery 2 good, but many times in life require us to tap into another mindset instead of just pretending everything is okay. overall, i really enjoyed dr. brown’s tedtalk and thought it gave great insights into how embracing vulnerability can help people become more whole. especially at our age and this stage in our life (with college beginning), everyone is going through different triumphs and struggles-both of which are important. another great quotation about vulnerability comes from our week 2 module: “the internal side of our nature is a moral logic and often an inverse logic. you have to give to receive. you have to surrender to something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself. you have to conquer the desire to get what you want. in order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). this statement from brooks really made me think about the changes all of us went through during the pandemic. when i look at myself now, i feel like a completely different person compared to who i was a year and a half ago. brooks here was spot on: i would say i almost completely lost myself during those times, but doing so helped me emerge as a better man and as someone who understands his purpose in life much better than i ever did before. i honestly do not think i would have been able to adjust nearly as well here if i hadn’t gone through all this self reflection and struggle during the pandemic. lastly, for my belief about being honest and authentic with yourself, father pete has some great insights: “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be, the person that god has created you to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week 3). father pete’s entire video reflection was very encouraging for me as i’ve tried to navigate the craziness of the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois mullery 3 first couple weeks of college. with everything going on, it’s extremely easy to get caught up in spending time with friends, studying, and other activities and not leave time for both myself and for god. father pete reminds me that though these are all good things, finding who god really wants me to be is most important, not only here, but as i move into other stages of my life. i am a student, athlete, leader, brother, son, and many other things, but above all i am a child of god. another thing i believe is that the people who surround you are extremely important in helping you along your journey. everyone wants to have good people around them, but sometimes we can get caught up in toxic relationships, as discussed in week 4: “nothing feels worse than being used in any relationship. usually, our red flags start going off when we start to notice our friend is taking more than giving, but sometimes we don’t want to admit it to ourselves” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). this quotation from the “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” article struck me because of how applicable it is to where i am as a college student. going in, i wanted to think that everyone here was my friend and no one had any ill-intentions. however, even at a place like this, there are still people that want to take advantage of others and use them for some ulterior motive-whether that’s money, other friends, or so on, we all need to watch for the warning signs. another thing that struck me from the article is that toxic relationships are not limited to romantic ones-it’s just as easy to get caught in a toxic friendship. i feel like many people only talk about bad romantic relationships (and don’t get me wrong those are a huge issue), but toxic friendships can hurt so much, especially on the mental side of things. it’s extremely exhausting to care so much for a friend, only for them to ignore you, manipulate you, talk down to you, etc. overall, surrounding yourself with good people who care for you and will always be there when you need them is absolutely crucial in navigating college life and staying happy. another key in https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ mullery 4 surrounding yourself with good people is becoming part of a community with many perspectives and viewpoints, as illustrated in our week 7 module: “i've always felt that it is impossible to engage properly with a place or a person without engaging with all of the stories of that place and that person. the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). i’ve watched the “danger of a single story” tedtalk many different times in the last couple years, but i feel like every time it still hits home. it is so crucial that we surround ourselves with diverse forms of everything: news, people, communities, etc. that’s what i think is so great about our community: we have so many different perspectives around campus even though we generally have similar goals and visions for the future. even with this community, though, we must still be willing to branch out further instead of trapping ourselves in a bubble. only then will we truly be able to have broad enough influences to understand the world as a whole better. lastly, i believe that it is absolutely crucial that we all remember where we come from. in week 6 when we wrote the poem, i thought a lot about how my upbringing influenced the person i am today. likewise, in week 5, i thought about where our school comes from: “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country…dear father, you may well believe that this branch of your family is destined to grow and extend itself under the protection of our lady of the lake and st. joseph. at least such is my firm conviction; time will tell whether i am deceived or not” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. edward sorin moreau fye week 5). i find it crazy that all the way back in 1842, father sorin had such a vivid vision of what notre dame would become, even with barely any of the land in the area being https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view mullery 5 developed. i’ve always been a big history guy, so reading stuff like this and seeing old pictures of our school really interests me. more than just being able to imagine physically what it would become, he also knew how powerful our mission would be and worked as hard as he could to ensure it would continue on long after he was gone. now, just as father sorin dreamt of doing big things here, i am doing everything i can to make an impact and better myself and others. as i reflect on how my story relates to the mission of notre dame, some recurring thoughts i’ve had over the last couple weeks come to mind. at times, i’ve felt like i’m not doing enough compared to my peers-i feel like other people are constantly talking about how many clubs they’re joining, service work, sports teams, etc. meanwhile, i’ve signed up for a couple things but have really only been focusing on school right now. though i originally had feelings of inadequacy, i now realize that everyone’s journey to be a “force for good” is different. obviously, being involved in a lot of clubs and activities that will help people is nice, but just because i’m not there yet doesn’t mean i haven’t still been doing what i can. right now, maybe my way of being a “force for good” is being there for friends whenever they need me. my goal will always be to keep doing more, but for right now, i’m happy with where i’m at and how i’ve tried to live out our mission. moreau first year experience 1 dec 2021 fighting uncertainty with the power of clarity saying that my first semester at notre dame has been eventful would be an understatement. attending college brought on a variety of new academic and social experiences in my life. i knew that the adjustment to college would take a while to get used too, especially at notre dame. it is an entirely different culture than what i am used to in my home of miami, florida. the weather, people, and distance from home was all shocking to me. all of this led to me experiencing uncertainty. i did not know how i would respond to the new challenges of college. however, i believe that the moreau first year experience course has helped me come with an answer to the challenges. whether it be better defining my values or understanding others better, i believe that i have applied what i have learned in moreau to my experiences at notre dame. this sense of clarity has helped me in what was a very uncertain situation at first. i was uncertain if i belonged at notre dame. i remember that when i applied to the school, i was not sure if my test scores and grades would be enough for the high academic expectations of notre dame. when i first heard back from the school, i found out that i had been waitlisted. when i was eventually taken off the waitlist and admitted, i was very excited but also felt uncertain if i belonged at notre dame. i experienced imposter syndrome. this did not change in my early time on campus as i heard that many of my peers had gotten nearly perfect scores on all their exams and never got bs in high school. week 9 of the course helped me with my feelings of not belonging. it helped me realize that i worked hard to get where i am, and i should be proud of that. julia hogan says, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you must perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine) i realized that it didn’t matter if i felt i was undeserving of being at notre dame, i was here. instead of trying to be perfect, i am trying to do the best i can in everything i do. academically, i feel that if i try my best than i will be fine with whatever outcome. although i always wanted to attend notre dame. i was nervous for college life. being in a completely new place, i missed my friends from home, and i also wondered if i would be able to make new friends. one thing that helped me was realizing that everyone was likely going through the same experience i was and wanted to meet new people. through moreau, i have learned to appreciate community. i appreciate both the community of keenan hall and notre dame as a whole. i feel that my dorm, keenan hall, is a great example of a community being built the right way. i have made friends from different parts of the country and world. that has led to differences in cultures and opinions, but i believe community is about accepting and respecting everyone. parker j. palmer described community well when he said, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as “enemy.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). though i don’t believe i have any enemies at notre dame, i think this quote is relevant to my experience. community is about better understanding and respecting people. one example of this would be my relationship with my roommate. we both had differences on when we wanted to go to sleep or if we should be allowed to have our friends over during the day, but we were able to solve these differences. by understanding each of our points of view, i believe we get along better and have helped to better build the notre dame community. i believe that i have experienced some brokenness at notre dame. though my experience has been a positive one, i have faced some challenges, especially with academics. though i strive to do the best in everything i can, that does not guarantee i will get the outcome that i want. i relate with the theme of brokenness from week 10 regarding approaching failure. kirsten helgeson says “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson – moreau fye week ten). personally, this quote seems to say that we do not always need to be perfect because it isn’t possible. there is a beauty in accepting that because it is the first step in trying to improve ourselves. though i am applying this quote to academics, i believe it is relevant in social or other personal aspects of life. rebuilding yourself after experiencing a break is crucial for self-improvement. father james b. king said, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven.” (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. kings, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). this quote serves as a reminder to me of why i chose notre dame. it is different than your average college. i truly believe that my mind and heart are being cultivated. i believe that the moreau course is a great example of this as it allows me to focus on issues like hope and faith that likely wouldn’t be present in another college’s curriculum. notre dame provides many ways which i believe i have grown in faith and hope. one clear way is through section grotto, a tradition in my dorm where all the members of our floor section attend the grotto of our lady of lourdes. after using my mind after a day of work, the grotto offers a chance for me to use my heart. uncertainty was prevalent during the start of my notre dame journey. luckily, i have encountered community and hope which has allowed me to fight off various negatives like imposter syndrome and brokenness. i believe i am a more complete person for experiencing this clarity. however, i still have a lot of room for growth. my notre dame journey has just gotten started, and i now feel that i have a foundation for what i want to get out of it. christopher giaimo moreau first year experience mr. retartha due april 29th the mission statement and growth of a generic new yorker over the course of the last two semesters i believe that i have truly grown as a person. over both the first semester and the last 13 weeks in this class i believe that i have definitely grown as a person. moreau was probably one of my favorite classes in the sense that it was something unique. all of my other classes focus on a subject found in highschool such as math, science, english, and history. however, the subject of moreau was my growth as an individual which was something that i valued because i have never focused on it before. at the beginning of the year, i embarked on a new chapter in my life focused on college. i have never been away for long and i would say that i have a pretty close relationship with my family so i anticipated that the transition wouldn’t be easy. i was right, meeting countless challenges beyond the ones that i was expecting. on the other hand, i was also given countless opportunities that others would kill for. my mission as a student at notre dame is to put in every ounce of effort that i can produce. i will overcome challenges that help me grow as a person and i plan to help others around me in the notre dame community grow as well. over the last semester, i have completed 13 qqc’s which have helped me track my growth and i plan to integrate all of them and talk about how they correlate with my mission statement and how it will grow over the next 4 years. in week 1, i addressed the question “what life am i living?” this is a very important question because to understand one’s growth you must first understand where you began. at the start of the semester, i had realized that my life prior to coming to college was one that was very sheltered. i had lived in my own bubble in new york, while it was diverse with people it was nothing compared to the completely different perspectives i was going to encounter in college. i also realized that i have lived a very technological life: “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” ( "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). like pico says, we don’t make the best use of technology, and i can definitely see that misusage in my life. while technology does serve the purpose of benefiting my life, i definitely use it as a distraction more than as i should. i have learned that to benefit as much as i possibly can from technology i must slow down and live every moment in a way that i can look back and be proud that i wasted little to no time. this focus on living in the moment extends beyond myself to my community which is where my mission as a student comes into play. in week 2, i addressed the question “what inspires a life well-lived?” this is also an important question as it has to do with my goals. at the end of the day, who doesn’t want to live a well-lived life? i found that what remained constant in my life before and after my freshman year was my reliance on relationships. relationships are what makes us human and they give us strength. prior to this year, i found my strength in my family and friends. after this year, while i https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ still relied on my family and friends over facetime, i had to make new relationships with friends and advisors which gave me strength that i could use. my favorite quote from this week dealt with relationships: “success comes from the power of friendship” ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). at certain times in everyones’ lives they are weak, however, they become stronger through those around them. when i am weak i hope to be lifted up by not only my friends and family but also the notre dame community. with regards to my mission as a student and community member i hope to be a source of this strength for others. in week 3, i addressed a similar question to the previous week: “what guides a life well-lived?” i am a strong believer in the fact that suffering and overcoming makes us stronger. facing difficulties such as a bad grade or having a huge argument with your best friend ultimately gives us guidance and knowledge on how to move forward in life. one of the best quotes from this week came from a nun who believed facing death was one our biggest difficulties: “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ( "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). accepting difficulties, while death may be a difficult one that i haven’t exactly thought about much yet, gives us a path to our future. these paths filled with challenges won’t be the easy path, but are definitely the more rewarding one. in my mission to be the best person i can be, i plan to not avoid challenges but meet them head on. in week 4, the focus question was “what are possible ways of living a life well-lived?” everyone has a different definition of what a life well-lived is and that is why there are so many ways of living life. sometimes you are unsure of what move to make next in life. this is a problem that i have faced throughout my life, but especially here where i am determining what i want to be for the rest of my life. specifically, determining my major has been something that i fear because i am unsure if it will leave me on a rigid path for the rest of my life. the source for this week alleviated this fear: “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” ( “navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) moreau fye week. with this knowledge i can make decisions without fearing long-term consequences. sometimes you have to just make decisions without fear and that is something i plan to do over the next 4 years. in week 5, i addressed the question “what role do others play in my discernment?” this week was special in the sense that we did not do a regular qqc, but we wrote a paragraph based on a conversation that we had with our friends. i realized how unique that we both were and i mentioned it in our third integration, but a quote that i will take with me for the rest of my life came from the last semester: “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage. nobody can be you the way that you can be you” ( “2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five (last semester)). being myself inherently gives me an advantage over my competition and my mission as a notre dame student is to continue to be myself and promote individuality among all in the community as it is our strengths. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://news.nd.edu/news/carla-harris-2021-laetare-address/ in week 6, we thought about “what are personal obstacles to living a life well-lived and how do i respond?” in this week we watched a video about a man who was paralyzed then attempted to commit suicide. however, he found new found strength in his challenges and is living an admirable life inspiring others. he says that while we always search for the easiest answers they are not always right: “we tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers” ( “5 minutes” aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week 6). facing the truths, although they may sometimes be an ugly truth, always benefits you more than lying to yourself. staying true to myself and facing truths no matter how ugly is a goal that i will try to stick to over the next 4 years. in week 7, we thought about “what relationships are characteristic of a life well-lived?” this is a pretty good question which i answered in an earlier paragraph. my favorite quote from this week was “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another ‘you,’ and another ‘you,’ and it turns into an ‘us’” ( “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). unfortunately, we live in a pretty divided society and hearing this quote from pope francis is something that could potentially alleviate some of the partisanship. i plan to bring people together rather than push people apart in my mission as a student. in week 8, we finally answered the question about what was a life well-lived. we wrote eulogies for ourselves and for me personally i feel it really helped me figure out the way that i wanted to be remembered as a person who others respected for my drive to be the best person that i possibly could be. in week 9, we addressed a difficult question: “how do i engage with accompaniment in a suffering world?” some people view helping others as being completely selfless. while i don’t deny that there is definitely a selflessness to helping others, i also believe that helping others helps you. personal growth via volunteer services is something that i have been fortunate to experience throughout my life: “accompaniment reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that “over there” and “here” are intertwined” ( “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). helping others builds an all around more compassionate and beneficial community which is part of my mission as a notre dame student. in week 10, the focus question was “how do i embrace humanity?” notre dame as i mentioned before is a pretty diverse community with countless perspectives from unique individuals. therefore, i gained a wider perspective from living in this community and by embracing others perspectives you get a more accepting community. these different perspectives on life also had different perspectives on god. i really enjoyed seeing how others viewed god and through these perspectives my thoughts on god grew as well. my favorite quote from this week dealt with the topic of god: “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” ( “growing up gay and catholic” (jacob walsh, grotto) moreau fye week 10). throughout my life i have found that god shows his love in mysterious ways that are only https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 revealed if you are paying attention hard enough. embracing differing perspectives fosters more diverse and fruitful communities which is a goal of my mission over the next 4 years. in week 11, we thought about the question “how do i become wise?” i found this question to be very interesting because different people have different opinions on what it means to be wise. i find this to be very relevant in today’s society because oftentimes people discredit other peoples’ opinions because they are different. in today’s society “we live in a 24/7 cycle of political news that saturates every corner of our culture” ( “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). this is why it is crucial for people to formulate their own opinions rather than simply always agreeing with others without contest. very ideas and thoughts provide a more diverse community which is beneficial and it is my goal to contribute to the community. in week 12, we answered the question “how do i grow in my courage to act?” when presented in a difficult situation as a bystander it can become difficult to act for a variety of reasons. many people fear the consequences of their intervention and, therefore, they may not stand up for what is right. however, if we are to attack injustice at its core then we must stand up without fear for others who cannot: “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation” (dean g. marcus cole: “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” moreau fye week 12). hate breeds only more hate, and my goal over the next 4 years is to oppose this hate by any means possible. in week 14, i wrote a much more brief mission statement than the one that encapsulates this essay. i focused on many of the goals that i mentioned in this piece such as the fact that i have had a fortunate life and i am looking forward to facing difficult challenges and overcoming them by sheer determination. my mission is to bring this determination and will power to help not only myself but those around me as well. this course has helped me unravel what i now know to be my real self and i look forward to showing all those around me in the notre dame community my true identity. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ li 2 anthony polotto moreau first year experience 3 october 2021 my unique worldview it’s almost impossible to get everyone to agree on something. from the existence of lizard people to the shape of the earth to far-fetched conspiracy theories, it seems everything can be debated nowadays. on a more serious note, though, it’s completely understandable that everybody has their own opinions and beliefs that they hold to be important in their own life. we’ve all had different experiences, backgrounds, cultures, religions, etc. that we grew up in that can never be identical to someone else’s. even identical twins raised in the same household will eventually grow to become completely different people with their own unique personal values and beliefs. through my experience so far at notre dame, it’s shaped many of my beliefs in just the few months i’ve been here. i believe that i must acknowledge my mistakes to grow, that i need close relationships to flourish and live a good life, and that spirituality can lead to a life full of purpose and morals. i truly believe that without recognizing my own downfalls, biases, and vulnerabilities, i cannot grow and improve as a person. if i never admit that i don’t know something, how would i ever learn? brené brown in her ted talk claims, “vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). this demonstrates that being able to admit one’s faults is critical to developing as a person. at notre dame, i’ve had to be honest about not knowing countless things. for example, when i joined the rocketry team, i had no idea what cad or apogee or actuation meant. there was so much terminology i didn’t know and so many programs i had never used before. it was only by being vulnerable and admitting i didn’t know what they were talking about that i was able to learn. if i had never been vulnerable and pretended like i understood what they were talking about, i would’ve learned nothing and would’ve wasted my time there. now, i feel like i belong as a part of the team and i’m able to contribute to the overall success of the team while also learning more skills because of my vulnerability. additionally, though, i think it’s important to understand that people are not perfect. i am not perfect. we all like to think of ourselves as being better than most people, or at least above average, but we all have flaws. the article in week seven notes that implicit bias tests reveal that people are much more biased than they self-report on surveys. (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris – moreau fye week seven). again, this just shows that i probably have many flaws that i don’t even know about, but without recognizing these biases, it’s impossible to fix them. i truly believe that i must first identify problems and downfalls within me before i can improve upon them and improve as a person by getting rid of these biases. the ted talk in week two talks about adam i versus adam ii mentalities, and that to grow as people we need the adam ii values of introspection and reflection rather than the adam i values of ambition, wealth, and materialism (“david brooks: should you live for your résumé… or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). this further emphasizes my point that i need to grow by reflecting on myself, not chasing after short-term goals or ambitions for materialistic pleasure. it’s only by actively trying to improve myself that i’m going to able to do so. if i get distracted by short-term, selfish goals, i’ll never be able to truly change as a person (or in a positive way at least). in short, i believe that being vulnerable and retrospective are both critical to learning and growing as a person and i’ll continue learning from others and from myself during my time here at notre dame. one of the most important aspects of learning and growing as a person is to build close relationships with others. talking with other people allows both parties to learn from each other and support one another through difficult times. this belief is evident in my “where i’m from” poem where i wrote, “i am from close friends who feel like another family, where we share our worries and delights without hesitation” (“where i’m from” by (me) – moreau fye week six). this demonstrates that i firmly believe that everyone needs friends to get each other through tough times. a lot of the times, situations seem less insurmountable when it’s verbalized through dialogue with another person. plus, talking with others lets me learn about information that i wouldn’t have otherwise. talking to guys in my dorm (keenan) let me know that certain study spots are amazing and mostly unheard of or that nick (my ra) is really chill and a great guy to talk to about literally anything. my point is, without talking to others and forming these friendships, there are so many opportunities and chances to learn that are lost because it’s simply impossible for someone to know everything that’s happening. it’s also why networking is so valuable when people start looking for jobs/internships. this is further supported by an article that says, “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). at notre dame, i can’t say that i’ve formed a close friendship with people yet, but i’m sure that some of my current friends will definitely be majorly important to me over the course of the next four years. however, i still believe that close friendships are what allow me to live a good life. the close friendships that i have now provided me with so much joy and saved my hide on so many occasions that it’s almost unreal to think about. (the same goes for my family, who i’m ever-so-grateful for but didn’t talk about in this section because the citations didn’t really mention family.) again, i think that without these close relationships, life loses a lot of its meaning and joy. moving forward, i’m definitely trying to form these close relationships while maintaining the ones i have now. i also believe that spirituality and finding faith can enable people to live life with purpose. my experiences at notre dame have brought me closer to religion than i’ve experienced for most of my life. from mass in the chapel to prayers at the grotto to keenan bible study, i’ve been able to personally experience the massive impact that faith has on many people. a quote from an article claims, “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerburg – moreau fye week three). i think that this is true for people who have found faith in their life. it guides them, gives them morals to live by, and provides purpose for life. spirituality creates bonds between people and god, and these bonds are oftentimes some of the strongest bonds that can exist. there’s something special about it that can’t be adequately described in words, but once it’s experienced, it’s truly unforgettable. an example of how faith can transform someone is seen with the saying, “we cannot love the god whom we cannot see if we don’t love the brother whom we do see” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c – moreau fye week five). this demonstrates that spirituality leads to someone becoming a better person. it teaches us to love and respect others and live life with morality. that’s one of the reasons why notre dame is such an amazing place to be. everyone’s inclusive, respectful, and truly love one another regardless of who they are. i think that this environment is infectious, and i want to be able to become as inclusive and loving as the notre dame community has treated me so far. in short, my time here at notre dame has already begun to shape my personal beliefs. i’ve learned to become more vulnerable and retrospective to improve as a person. i’ve realized the value in the relationships i have with others and to form more of them moving forward. i’ve experienced the transformation that faith can bring to people and the good that it brings to the world. however, these are just my personal, subjective beliefs. i’m sure the next four years will either strengthen, alter, and/or change a lot of the beliefs i hold right now, and i’m sure i’ll discover more of what i truly believe as i spend more time here. i know my beliefs aren’t facts and others might have vastly different opinions on these topics, but as of right now, it’s currently my unique worldview. integration moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 “i still got a lot to learn i’ll admit it” my title for this week’s integration refers to lyrics from a song by luke christopher called “lot to learn”. i found them to be fitting, as even though this assignment is about what we’ve learned and what we believe, i recognize that there is still a lot in life that i don’t yet understand or haven’t experienced. to me, root beliefs serve as mini mission statements, giving us guidelines for not only what we believe, but also for how we will choose to live our lives going forward. having gone to a catholic high school, i’ve always appreciated how my theology classes gave us the opportunity to take a step back and look at the big picture. this is also the same thing i have enjoyed about the moreau first year experience so far. i love being able to talk about these bigger things in life, especially being able to do so with my classmates. and although we have only been here for a little under two months, my experiences interacting with my peers in and out of the classroom as well as the content we have seen in the modules has definitely impacted my root beliefs. i believe that in order to understand others we first have to be able to understand ourselves. in our first module, dr. brown talked about the importance of being able to acknowledge our own insecurities and worries, but not letting them control our lives(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). to me, this comes back to understanding ourselves. we all want to be able to help others in their struggles in life, but how can we do that if we aren’t first able to help ourselves? we have to be able to examine our own lives and understand our own problems, and in doing so we are practicing how to be better https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be equipped for helping others in similar situations. even in our short time here, there have been moments where i was more able to help others because i recognized what they were going through as something that i’ve experienced. i believe that god has given all of us the gifts we need to live out his plan for us. in our second module, we were asked the question of whether or not we should be living life for our resumes or our eulogies(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooksmoreau fye week two). in my mind, the answer to this is clear. eulogies capture what our purpose was in life, resumes capture what our job was. ideally, the two will go together, where our job also allows us to live out our purpose, but that is why we need to be able to let god’s gifts guide us in the direction of his plan. in meeting so many new people since coming here, it is interesting to see what people notice about you, and to some extent what they perceive you as being good at. although the thoughts of others shouldn’t be our guide to what we do, i think it is important to pay attention to those remarks about “giving good advice” or “being well-spoken”, or things like that. those comments come back to the gifts god has given us that will help us throughout our lives. i believe that searching is a necessary part of growing closer to god. throughout all of our early modules, but especially in weeks 3 and 4, i picked up on the importance of searching. in our course material it became clear to me that it’s not just finding what we are looking for that matters, but the actual act of searching has value in it as well. whether that be searching for healthy and happy friendships(“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaignmoreau fye week four), or trying to find and have faith(“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.moreau fye week three), the journey we go on in searching allows us to learn a lot about ourselves and the world around us, and can be just as fruitful as actually discovering what we are looking for. throughout the early process of meeting friends here, it definitely was stressful at times, and when i finally felt a level of security in my friendships it was relieving, but during the time of figuring out those relationships i was also able to understand more of who i am, and what kinds of people i interact well with. similarly, in the ongoing process of trying to find and keep faith in my life as a framework, there definitely are times where i struggle in looking for it, but i think those moments lead to even greater reflection and make it all the more worth it when i do feel as though i have found what i am looking for. i believe that we all have stories worth telling. in our week 6 module, we all shared poems about where we’re from, and essentially what makes us who we are(“where i’m from” by george ella lyonmoreau fye week six). this was one of my favorite assignments we had throughout the first two months, as it allowed me to learn a lot about my classmates. i’ve always enjoyed learning about people, whether that be through biographies, movies, podcasts, etc., but in doing this module i saw that it’s not just the public figures of the world who have interesting stories and lives to talk aboutwe all do. hearing my classmates share their poems gave me perspective on how these seemingly new people to me have lived whole lives prior to coming to school here, and that they all have valuable and different experiences that i can learn from. i believe that the work we do here matters. in week 7, we read and saw material on what for many of us(myself included), is a difficult topic to talk about. acknowledging and learning about our personal and national transgressions towards other groups of people isn’t easy, but it is so important. we read about how it’s possible to believe we are a great nation while still working to better understand one another and heal our 400 year old wounds(“how to destroy truth” by david brooksmoreau fye week seven), and i come from a similar line of thinking where i agree that it is important that we have these difficult conversations and work to be the great country that i believe we can be. this may seem like a lofty aspiration, but when we look at our content from week 5, we see that this is exactly what we have been called to do here from the very beginning(“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. sorinmoreau fye week five). if we are to be “one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country”, it starts with being able to talk about the difficult things, and understanding that the work we do here has a purpose that is greater than ourselves. overall, i am grateful for what i have been able to learn and experience in my time so far. although many of the biggest lessons we get often come outside of the classroom, i appreciate having a space to learn and grow in my understanding of the world around me along with my peers. in writing this it is clear to me that there’s been many lessons and teachable moments here already, but i know that there are many more to come, and that “i still got a lot to learn”. microsoft word moreau integration one assignment dr. vanessa chan moreau first year experience: integration one assignment october 15, 2021 “becoming part of something: cultivate friendships, get uncomfortable, and remember your roots” throughout the past eight weeks, i truly believe that i have experienced some of the most impactful and meaningful personal growth and development of my entire life. from having perhaps the most freedom that i have ever had to experiencing dorm life for the first time, the daily occurrences and special occasions alike have contributed to a genuinely amazing first eight weeks of college. thus, i believe that i am searching for lifelong friendships and memories that i will be able to look back on and smile at for a very long time. as a young child, i was very shy and slowly grew out of that as i went through school, and i have felt that notre dame has been a place where i have completely let go of that and become more outgoing. on day 1 in fisher hall, i had no problem going up to people that i did not know and introducing myself, something that probably would not have been the case for me a few years ago. additionally, i have found that everything in college is a social event. a little bit to my surprise, i love this and really like be around some really amazing people all the time! this fit right in with our conversations about searching for self-knowledge, as i really learned how much i am looking for friendships to share my successes and failures in for a very long time. i enjoy sharing my daily experiences, like going to a camp kesem meeting, with my section mates just as much as i enjoy hearing about their days. david brooks, in a ted talk on this topic, said, “nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). i am worried about my resume in college, but this quote adds the perspective that achievements will not fulfill us. however, there is hope in finding meaningful relationships and making happy memories that can help to fulfill us. i have tried to be “yes” man, open to trying to new things while i am here. this is one way that i noted that i could search for life-giving relationships, which is something i certainly am searching for. olivia t. taylor, in her article about toxic relationships, writes, “feeling both good and bad about a friend, however, is the first sign of a toxic friendship” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week 4). i have felt only good about many of my friends here, and i think that is a testament to both of our attitudes. many of our looking for great friendships and memories, and i look forward to continuing meeting new friends. while i had a great high school experience and look back on it fondly, there are naturally somethings that i knew i wanted to do differently in college. i wanted to grow socially and academically, and i believe that i grow by simply getting uncomfortable. going to office hours in the basement hayes-healy, a building that i don’t know where there aren’t a lot of freshmen, to see a professor that i also don’t know very well, is not something that i was super comfortable with. however, i really needed help with calculus. joining rotc and going through pt, orientation, and other exercises with people i did not know before most freshman arrived was something that i was not comfortable with. in class, i recall discussing how we found a framework, or structure (potentially through faith) and meaning in our lives. academic success and social enjoyment are essential to my framework, and i know that going to office hours and joining rotc have helped me immensely in both areas. meeting new people is an important aspect of this, as getting uncomfortable as helped me meet a lot of amazing people, many of whom are different than me. when we discussed how we identify perspectives and bias, an article stated that “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris – moreau fye week seven). it isn’t pleasant to think that myself or others might not always have the most honest or kind intentions in mind but understanding that this is the case allowed me to make sure that i was being honest with my intentions. getting uncomfortable for me also meant allowing my plans to be less structured (“going with the flow”). my parents, another part of my framework, were not here, and thus fr. pete mccormick really resonated with me when he said, “when i was driving with my parents, all roads led home. when i was driving by myself, everything felt a little more unclear” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 3). things were more unclear without my parents, and a lot of my classmates noted the same thing during class discussion. however, i found that i grew and had a lot of fun navigating life without them. from all the way back to week 1, i remember simply thinking about how getting uncomfortable was one of the reasons i felt that college was going great throughout the last eight weeks. brené brown said to “lean into the discomfort of this work” in reference to diversity, equity, and inclusion work (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week 1). this work involves making connections, and i extend this to many things in college. i’ve tried to lean into the discomfort of asking a question in a giant lecture, going on a weekend adventure, or simply going to a new club. the greatest rewards i have had so far in college have stemmed from quite simply getting uncomfortable. finally, i believe that i am responsible for getting excited about the future and focusing on where i’m going without forgetting where i am from. weeks 5 and 6, where we discussed how we identify narratives and influences in our lives, reminded me of all the interesting conversations i’ve had here, ranging from initial conversations and domerfest to longer conversations with those that i’ve grown closer to, where i’ve gotten to hear all the cool experiences and life stories that my classmates have to share. when people say, “where are you from?”, i answer with my hometown of buffalo, ny, but really want to quote something from my poem, such as “i’m from the leaf pile out in the yard in the fall,” illustrating that i am an “outdoorsy” person who really loves fall. i love it here at notre dame and have learned that it is important to “buy in” to this community in moreau. many of us here are focused on our futures not only as notre dame students, but as professionals in the “real world” soon. i try to remember where i’m from, a hard-working, city known as the “city of good neighbors” as i navigate this. i bring this perspective to our school community, and thus i really liked when fr. kevin grove said, “families are schools for their members to learn to love” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 5). when i focus on where i’m going, i think of how i am learned and am continuing to learn how to love. this is what i need to bring with me, and overall, and i feel that i have continued to learn to love because of the community at notre dame. i feel like am part of something here, and that is very special. the focus question for this session is: "in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?" 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? in what ways do stories shape my journey? with every story heard or read, i gain a new perspective. i can now see a new opinion on a new topic with a new lens. through storytelling, we build meaningful relationships that connect deeper than before. oftentimes, values, opinions, and thoughts are better communicated through a medium where we put an audience in our shoes. this way of storytelling has allowed writers to hold an audience’s attention longer without boring them with a lecture. i know with every story i hear, i’m able to become more empathetic and open myself up to respecting another person’s accomplishments or mistakes. for me also, telling stories is a way to remember and reflect on past lessons i’ve experienced. i can look back on stories to see if i progressed, decide what i should do next, or whether to make the same or different decision. as i collect more stories, my decisions and resolutions have become wiser and mindful, and with everyday, i become a better version of myself. hopefully, stories will continue to improve how i make decisions and tackle questions that are too complicated for a yes or no, right or wrong. my journey to notre dame is also thanks to my ability to storytell in my college essays! 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: how can we take the blame away from others and become empathetic? quote: “the way to live is with vulnerability and to stop controlling and predicting.” as humans, we set a border, more or less a parameter, around what we want to control. we think our input will directly influence the outcome of what we can control. we feel at ease having to put aside a concern that could possibly have damaging consequences. however, the downside of control comes when things aren’t in control. if anything were to step out of line, we would feel exposed and think we’ve made a mistake. this mentality of keeping a straight line isn’t healthy nor entirely new. making mistakes should be a sign to embrace that we are imperfect, a sign that everything truly is uncertain. if we do, dr. brown’s definition of courage becomes an aphorism, a truth, on how to live our lives. once we let go of how we think everything should be, our lives become authentic and real, worthy of aspiring, and therefore vulnerable and beautiful. comment: by watching this presentation, i realize how truthful dr. brown’s viewpoints are. coming to notre dame, i’ve tried to put a persona on who i should be. i didn’t take into account how damaging it could be having to prove myself to other people. i should learn how to let go of my persona, my shield, and become vulnerable. for being vulnerable puts me in a place where joy, creativity, belonging, and love are a part of my life. i would hope that i can learn to embrace vulnerability and become my authentic self. only then can i give myself some respect and therefore give others respect too. integration 2 moreau professor hnatusko december 3 2021 encountering my life through my second semester in college, i have learned and encountered a lot. moreau helped me see and taught me more than i ever would have imagined. in week 13, i was presented with the question, what have i encountered, and how will i respond? i believe that i have encountered several life-changing events, some are good, and some are not so good. my most recent life-changing event is brian kelly leaving our team and feeling lost on what i should do next. through the moreau teachings, i have better learned how to respond to these life-changing events. in the following paragraphs, i will show you what i have encountered this semester and how the moreau teachings relate to how i responded. in week 9 of moreau, we learned why letting expectations go is crucial in an article called "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan. the report starts with the words, "i should be better at this, or my parents will be disappointed if i don't get this job" ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9). i related to this right away, and i have encountered many expectations in my life. i wanted to sit back and think about some of the expectations i have had in my life. when i was thinking about all of them, one common thing came into view. almost every expectation was set by myself, and i just told myself everyone else expected it. when i was in, high school i would think that everyone always expected me to play like the best player on the field. this is not possible, and nobody told me i always need to be the best. through reading the article, i realized https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau that letting expectations go is freeing, so i vowed to free myself from my own expectations. since that day, i have been so much happier. in week ten, i shared a personal experience from high school that still affects me today. when i was a senior in high school, my best friend, who is one of the most upstanding and kindhearted people i know, was accused of rape. at first, i was stunned, he told me it wasn't true, but i didn't know what to think, it just seemed so real. as the story played out, i saw the holes. my friend was innocent. the issue was that the people who didn't know him well took the girls' side immediately, and for this, i don't blame them. rape is a very, very serious topic, and if it was true, the girl would be deserving of the support and help she could get. as well, in the public's eyes, the story was true. this became a community deal, and i was stuck; i knew my friend had not done it, but i thought that if i spoke or stood with him, i would get shamed as well. when i read the content in week twelve, a quote from the article "could catholic schools teach critical race theory?" by christopher devron stood out to me. the quote about schools states, "school leaders are placed squarely in the middle, trying to respond to the demands of both groups and looking for support from their boards and other stakeholders" (should catholic schools teach critical race theory? by christopher devronmoreau fye week 10). in this quote, we see how school leaders are placed in a sticky spot in some community challenges because they are expected to take both sides, often in a conflict that is often not possible. it reminded me of my situation. i wish i was able to support my friend and the truth as well as show a sensitive side to a girl who was not raped but had some mental demons she had to fight. in the end, i decided to do what was right and stand with my friend. this was not a popular choice by any means, but it was the right one. in the end, my friend was found innocent, but this story still sits with me as i can now see how the world can be totally against you sometimes when you are in the right. https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 in week 11, the quote "the concept of a community must embrace even those we perceive as "enemy" stood out to me (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmermoreau fye week 11). i like this quote because it is very true. to be a successful community, one must be open to everyone in it, including those you consider your enemy. this semester i encountered a big challenge with my injury. it felt at times like the coaches forgot i even existed. i developed spite for one of my coaches, and he, in my mind, was my enemy. about halfway through the semester, i decided to try and understand him rather than hate him. i realized that he wasn't against me, but i was just injured, and during the season, that serves no help to his job. me being able to see this through helped me be more happy and enthusiastic about coming back to football. in week 12, we addressed the topic of hope. my whole life, i have been catholic, so hope has always been engraved in me—for example, the hope of the resurrection or the hope that god's kingdom is real. in one of the readings, i found a quote that states, "striving for completeness means spending one's life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests." i found this quote from the campus ministry very moving (holy cross and christian education by the campus ministrymoreau fye week 12). as i love and grow in hope, i try to emulate my life after christ, and although a very unachievable task, i know one day this will help me. on november 29th, i found myself falling back on my hope of a big challenge. my coach brian kelly left notre dame. i was stunned, i didn't know what to do, and i freaked out. as a freshman, when your coach leaves, it is scary. you will most likely spend the next three years playing for a coach that did not recruit you. i asked myself, what would jesus want me to do? to tell you the answer, i didn't know, but i did know what he would not want me to do. he http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051?module_item_id=102825 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051?module_item_id=102825 wouldn't want me to get angry and get upset with my family members/ girlfriend for no reason, and he surely would not want me to make irrational decisions in a time of stress. i decided to close my eyes and get my mind off of it by listening to some music and had hope in my heart that i was handling it the right way. integration one -root beliefs moreau fye integration one 1 i believe i am here to be a light; love in the little things with great love i believe that i grow through that which challenges me to expand my comfort zone. i have adopted dr. brown’s quote from the very first week of my college experience, “... ‘lean into the discomfort of the work,’ and i’m like, knock discomfort upside the head and move it over.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) not to say that i have all ‘a’s right now, but rather that the classes that have challenged me the most are the ones that i have come to love most because of how they push me to think abstractly or to continue to higher levels of learning, and that some of the most terrifying parts of college so far have produced the most fruitful encounters. from classes that challenge my perceptions of understanding and how we come to understand, to understanding more about the people around me and how to interact with those around me, i feel that throughout the past eight weeks, i do not feel that i am a changed person, but i feel that my approach to relationships has shifted. it is incredibly difficult to be vulnerable with strangers, or with those who we want to latch on to so quickly, and being in an environment with such high levels of knowledge and confidence, it is so easy to shell-up, or to take on a different persona to fit in with so many others around me. the two weeks of school i felt so overwhelmed with trying to complete schoolwork, make time for being friends, trying to go out to make new friends, find people who were in my major, find ways to cultivate my faith, while all trying to just breath. when i came out of those two weeks exhausted, i began to find a routine, and i began to raise my hand more to ask questions, in classes, but i also began to raise questions to myself to remind myself what was most important to me. revisiting our week 2 discussion, i was reminded of the characteristics in which i needed to spend more energy, not weaknesses, but strengths to improve, one of which was bravery. before coming to notre dame, i thought i was a relatively brave person, someone who took risks, and promoted taking risks. but after considering the idea that i was really focused on just building a resume rather than cultivating relationships, taking risks for the sake of growing rather than just to add to a resume, i have a greater sense of freedom. the amount of people that i just say “hi” to now has led to some of the most interesting relationships i have formed while on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be moreau fye integration one 2 campus, some of the weirdest encounters at 3am on library quad dancing to taylor swift, and to some of the greatest academic experiences that have challenged me to think about art and how we encounter the world around in such abstract ways. notre dame has challenged me to expand my comfort zone to include so many more relationship-building skills, to listen to those around me to understand them, and to explore who i am and how my story interacts with those of others, and to trust more deeply in myself, because as laetare-winner harris said, “there is only one you .. trust the power in you.” (notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address by carla harris moreau fye week 5). i believe that i am meant to love and to be loved. when first coming to notre dame, there was so much i was excited for, and still so much i was scared of. especially coming into quick relationships, finding faith amidst the chaos of such a massive transition in life, i was so nervous that i would fall back into patterns where i would give so much of myself to others that i would not save any to continue to grow as a person. i believe that what i have encountered is quite the contrary; i have found so much love, love in taking midnight walks with my roommate when we’ve both had crazy days, love in the invitations to dinner or lunch, love in the rarest forms of attention when someone is listening to you, really listening and responding honestly rather than half-there, love in the “in between moments” that are so small but so impactful. thinking about our week 4 and 5 discussions, the way that we form relationships with one another is often in faith or in love (which i think go hand in hand). the way in which i love others, through the little things of asking someone how their day was, or bigger things like trying to take care of someone while they were drunk i think reflects how i was taught to love within the context of faith and family, my story, as we discussed in weeks 5-7. it is harder to come to understand that i am meant to be loved, but in reflecting that god’s path is the right one for me, despite challenges, despite all that i have encountered thus far, i am reminded that he plays such a large role in my life, that he sacrificed so much for me because he loves me, and i deserve to be loved. i believe that i am here to be a light. i want to be clear that this does not mean that i have to always be a guiding force, or something that is always shining, but rather a force that can be there for people, as long as they remember how to turn it on, for light cannot function without https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 moreau fye integration one 3 darkness. these past few weeks have been a huge adjustment period, recognizing how my story and my background influences the way that i interact with peers and professors, and yet after these crazy two months, i feel the most me than i ever have. revisiting the week 3 grotto article, “faith invites us to live in the light,” and i like to believe that i am someone who can be there to cultivate relationships in the light with the holy spirit, faith, hope, and love in the center (faith brings light to a dark world by david fagerberg -moreau fye week 3). i am here to be myself, the greatest, best version of who i am, even if i feel challenged, or discouraged, or if i am celebrating with those around me, and to be who i am is to be that kindness, that love, and a light to interact with those around me. . https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/authors/david-fagerberg moreau integration two encounters of a lifetime november 30, 2021 as i watched my family drive away, i could feel my heart sink into my stomach. questions, worries, and anxieties were rolling around my head with seemingly no end in sight. i picked up my suitcase and walked up to the front door of my dorm, realizing that although i had made it to notre dame, the biggest emotion i felt was fear. leaving my family, friends, and world at home behind was one of the hardest things i have ever had to do in my entire life, and it began with my final glance at the car driving away. though the initial anxiety and heartbreak of leaving everything behind as i began my career at notre dame was difficult, i came to realize that this journey will be one i will remember and rely upon for the rest of my life, and how i choose to spend it is up to me. with this shift in mindset, i was ready to take on the college scene, including living with others my own age, attending rigorous classes, and forming a new social life. through my first semester at college, i have made many unforgettable memories, and with this, forged through new encounters and determined the ways in which i respond. upon my arrival at notre dame and within the first weeks of classes, i began to develop a feeling that i was in a completely different academic environment than i had ever been immersed in before. looking around me in each of my classes, i observed that nearly every single other student was engaged, taking notes, asking questions, preparing material, and apparently excelling in the new scene. this was a stark contrast to my high school environment, in which there were certainly students who were able to achieve great things in the system, but not as large of a sheer number of high-achievers as at notre dame. starting to worry, i began to develop what i have now come to understand as imposter syndrome, and as one quote expertly explains, “people who are highly skilled or accomplished often tend to think that others are just as skilled. this can spiral into feelings that they don’t deserve accolades and opportunities over other people” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). as i began to get good grades on homework assignments and tests, my feelings of accomplishment seemed to diminish knowing i was surrounded by students who likely performed as well or even better than me. over time, however, i was able to grasp the notion that while students here at notre dame are very strong academically, we all have different strengths and weaknesses, and likewise each accomplishment should be celebrated no matter what. i became so worried about the performance of others that i overlooked my own successes in the classroom, and now realize that it is good to feel good about the things i have achieved. amidst the chaos of a busy academic calendar, crammed social setting, and craze of new opportunities, i made sure to take time away from the congestion of day to day life and continue pursuing my faith as i had done so back home. participating in weekly mass was an aspect of life i cherished before coming to college, and i wanted to expand upon that desire to stay engaged with the church at notre dame. stepping into the basilica for the first time was an unforgettable experience, and attending my first sunday mass here on campus was even better. though i did not have my family around me, i had a new family of fellow followers of christ all around me, as we prayed, sang, and worshipped together. in reflecting upon this experience, i was reminded of the quote, “we can drag our patients along by continual temping, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). this quote from the screwtape letters outlines the notion that humans are alive for a purpose, and in the midst of a busy life in college, it was crucial for me to stay connected to my faith and understand my purpose here on campus and in the greater scope of life. i feel as though i am called to stay engaged in my community and faith traditions as i had done so back home, and by attending mass and becoming involved in faith services, i feel i have stayed close to my life purpose. following my catholic faith at notre dame has been one of the best decisions i have made, and i plan to continue to stay involved throughout my entire time at this school. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187501/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187501/download?download_frd=1 even among many great times here at notre dame, at one point, i was reminded of the harsh reality away from the notre dame sphere of positivity. what started as a routine check in call with my mom turned into one of heartbreak when she brought up that one of my closest uncles had passed away earlier in the week. not only that, i needed to put my studies and social life on hold to come back home for the funeral, and as difficult of words as these were to hear, i knew i could not let the family down. on friday night, instead of going out or spending time with friends, i had to pack my bags for the weekend trip home, only to be met with sadness and grief from my cherished family members. in this process, i found a particular quote to be very fitting, and it reads, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto / kirsten helgeson moreau fye week 10). the notion of hearts being breakable, yet able to be mended, was very reassuring to hear as i reflect on a time of sadness within my family life. though i had to travel home for a funeral and mourn the loss of a loved one, i was also reminded of all the great times we had together, and heard encouraging words of hope that my uncle will never truly be gone from our lives. though my heart was initially broken, it was able to be mended over time and has now become even stronger than before. a final point of emphasis as it relates to my encounters here at notre dame is closely tied to a notion i think about nearly every single day, and have made a point of emphasis for myself in this course. since the beginning of my time at notre dame, one of the biggest challenges for me personally has been finding friends, being vulnerable, and spending time with other people. coming from high school, where i preferred doing everything on my own and not spending time around other people besides my family, moving to college was a daunting task. aside from those i was living with and saw occasionally in passing, i had very little interaction with others my age range for the first few months of school. one of the ideas i came to realize eventually is noted in the quote, “the most common connotation of the word ‘community’ in our https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ culture is ‘intimacy,’ but this is a trap” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i had been thinking too much of friendship, meeting others, and finding a community as an intimate experience, where everyone involved needed to be very close and inseparable. through my time here at notre dame, however, i have come to realize that being a part of a community and staying engaged with other people can take nearly any form i choose, whether it be through dorm events or religious groups. once i overcame this mental hurdle, i was able to branch out of my comfort zone and start to become engaged with those around me, and the results have been surreal. in a complete flip of the script from my high school experience, i am now involved with teams, groups, and various organizations, all of which make me happy and feel connected. through stepping outside my comfort zone at notre dame, i have been able to forge and craft connections which will likely last a lifetime. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ integration two drew espeseth 3 december 2021 how the notre dame experience has shaped me the first semester of college can be a freeing and informative experience for everyone, and the experiences encountered at notre dame are no exception. the welcoming atmosphere and strong emphasis on community at notre dame help to counter some of the difficulties that we face as freshmen in a brand new environment, but i have found that there are still difficulties we all face, from fitting in to belonging and feeling safe. i believe that the most important observation i have made in the past three and a half months is that each person has a unique set of struggles that they arrived with, but we are all in the same place. each of us encounters different challenges, yet we all experience these challenges together. week 9: encountering dissonance brought to mind the subject of imposter syndrome, that is, feeling like one does not belong somewhere or does not deserve to be there. this is a common theme among students at a highly competitive school such as notre dame, because everyone seems to have a brilliant mind and a perfect life. of course, i know this is not true because i can look inwardly and see that life is not perfect, but this difference between my own reality and what falsely appears to be the reality of others can cause a feeling of isolation. it is difficult to be thrown into a pool of students that are of equal caliber, because it means you are average. an article in the grotto advises, “don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life” (week 9, julia hogan, why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, the grotto). keeping this in mind, i have learned that encountering talented and brilliant people is an incredible privilege that can be taken advantage of in my education. if we look past the slight imposter syndrome that we all feel, we can appreciate each other more and harness the synergy that stems from this multitude of intelligent minds. another interesting dynamic i have encountered here in my first semester is the unique way in which i deal with brokenness and suffering. this is part of what makes me myself, but also does not define me, “the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today” (week 10, women find healing through kintsugi workshop, the grotto). one particular experience i have had here caused me to spend a lot of time questioning myself, but eventually i decided that it is not my responsibility to understand the actions of others, only to focus on positively healing myself and learning acceptance. c.s. lewis seemed to understand the ups and downs of life very intimately, writing about the human condition, “the dryness and dullness through which your patient is now going are not, as you fondly suppose, your workmanship; they are merely a natural phenomenon which will do us no good unless you make a good use of it.” (week 12, c.s. lewis, the screwtape letters). this means to illuminate the fact that periods of struggle are a natural part of being human. i believe that since being human is beautiful, and being broken is part of what makes us human, it is safe to say that being broken is beautiful too. my experiences thus far have perhaps broken me in some cases, but have also built me up. there will always be more brokenness to encounter as well as more opportunities to build and grow, and it is simply because we are human. the grace we are instilled with that gives us the ability to interpret, respond, and grow from these ups and downs should be appreciated and admired, because it too is beautiful. the notion that i will naturally experience both difficulties and triumphs in life because of my humanity is comforting and actually brings me great hope. it implies that not only is everybody else struggling and succeeding by my side, but also that there will always be something better to look forward to. i think that it is a virtue to be excited and eager for the future, as it is an embodiment of hope and a sign of readiness for anything the world throws at us. within the communities i have been a part of throughout my life, i have found that one of the strongest bonds is that of mutual hardship. “hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (week 11, parker j palmer, thirteen ways of looking at community). palmer points out that part of living in a community is experiencing conflict, and it is ironically this conflict that unites us, because it is a common struggle. this means that having diversity within a group is highly beneficial to the strength and unity of the group and each of its individual members. in college, we are automatically set up to live in a diverse community and experience common suffering in the form of school. having a sense of community and believing in your peers is crucial to success in this setting. i probably have grown as an individual in more the past few months than in the several years preceding due to the vast diversity of people and opportunities i have encountered here at nd. facing the realities of other people that maybe are not what i expected and the realities of how i fit into this community has shown me that dissonance can be a teaching experience. brokenness can also be dissonant in the sense that it disrupts our usual rhythm, but when we learn to accept that brokenness is a part of that rhythm, we can make something better of the experience. the notre dame community is special to me because it has made me feel safe and loved despite this brokenness. knowing that each of my peers thrive in the notre dame family because every person is essential to the community gives me hope. the challenges that we each face separately are not truly faced alone because of the support system we have built here. moreau fyeintegration #2 google docs fys 10101 29 nov 2021 integration two coming from an asian family, i was often taught there was a preset road of success. get good grades in high school. go to a good college. participate in clubs and research activities. gain a job with a high salary. marry and have kids. die peacefully. whether i become a biochemist or an accountant, this was the tested and proven road to a happy life. getting off this success st. meant stumbling blindly towards an untested path. as most people would, i chose to walk on the crash-proof road instead of the bumpy road beside me. however, with the learnings i gained from moreau, i decided i will no longer make social media my hobby, but instead make it a potential career. after all, there had to be someone who tested the road first to ensure its safety. growing interests in the metaverse makes it no longer a technology in the near future, but a current issue. metaverse is formed from a combination of “meta”, meaning transcendent, and “verse”, from universe. it is used to describe a never-ending virtual environment that provides similar elements to our real world: trading cryptocurrencies, providing interoperability of platforms and services, and easy access in entry of both people and ideas. it is a place where individuals can share their ideas and create varieties of content for other users. companies like meta platforms, apple inc., and tesla jumping into this field, this hints towards a promising field of investment. i did not merely list facts to detail what technologies are coming into this field. when the tiktok rose to its popularity in 2018, i saw this as a possible career. creators could easily create content on their own, with large amounts of viewers waiting to see these said contents. entry was easy compared to other sources of media such as instagram and youtube, and trends could be easily established to gain popularity. while i was confident i could lead a successful life through this platform, my status as a student restricted me from preventing me from exploring further. looking back, it was not my student status that prevented me from exploring further into this field, but i was suffering from internal dissonance. i restricted myself from interacting in any commercial activities, because i believed students should not earn money, but should study in order to ride on board on success st. julia hogan states “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves).” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) i will no longer think of myself as a student or a college student, but think myself as an individual who can live to success through other means than simply studying. with this understanding i gained from moreau, i will no longer limit myself and lose that key opportunity, and take a leap of faith at the chance once i see it. gaining a career in social media will provide difficulties, but one of these is the people themselves. it is impossible to create content to satisfy everyone, meaning some people will exhibit negative opinions towards my actions. this is where i must bring up an example of my high school years. as the lead officer for the school math team, i wanted to change policies that prohibited me from exploring higher levels of mathematics. every month, 20 members were selected to participate in a statewide competition. the selection process for this competition was extremely biased, allowing officers to participate in competitions regardless of the efforts they put into the organization. while other members of the organization took tests to place in the roster, some officers didn’t take tests but made it into the competition. to fix this issue, i attempted to force officers into testing for the roster as all other individuals do. although this decision was accepted by all members, disputes began to happen when i removed an officer from the competition roster due to their lack of engagement. although i gave repeated warnings to the above stated officer, they refused to accept this fact. this behavior lines up with one of the quotes given in the moreau exercises: “conviction, however, is not all good. it can easily be corrupted by pride and greed and lead to hatred and division.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” moreau fye week ten) the officers' pride prevented themselves from accepting the decision. as i learned in moreau, we humans are born with more negatives than positives; humans are very fragile beings. i must ensure that my opinions and emotions are not swayed by pride and greed in the future when delving into a pool of dangerous viewers. putting the learnings regarding my career path aside, i want to put the focus on what i learned in moreau and integrate those into my experience at university of notre dame. i come from hawaii, a state composed of 36.9% asian people and 1.9% black or african american. most of my life has been populated with asian communities, as i lived in south korea, japan, and china. i have seen various communities have dialects that i have difficulty understanding. i was afraid that not understanding these dialects would often make conversations come to a stop, so i avoided making communities with these groups. i continued to converse with communities i know and had experience with. this behavior continued until i came across week 11’s quotes: “and finally, if we’re really serious about trying to make the world a better place, then diversity matters for all of us.” (“diversity matters” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). although i had no interest in making the world a better place, i was alarmed again that to have a successful career life, i had to take in diversity and dive into other cultures to expand my understanding. thus, i started to take my steps forward and involve myself in other cultural clubs. as i begin to come closer to the ending of this semester’s worth of moreau, i can say with confidence that i discovered many facts about myself that i would have otherwise neglected. actions such as opening myself up to vulnerability and identifying influences in my core beliefs are some things that i would have never explored without moreau. these questions i ponder about myself help develop a better image of myself, and show in what ways i should improve. i can grow and live in hope by constantly asking myself questions. what do i prefer? how many hours can i live in? what is the minimum cost i need to survive 30 days? these questions i ask myself will keep my everyday life fun to live within, and give me hope in a fashion of joy. the actions that teacher took and the actions i took made me realize that i have a mild interest in teaching. “those who are too vigilant are unaware that a great talent of a good teacher is often to pretend not to notice what he or she does not want to be obliged to punish.”(“hope holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week twelve). integration two responding to personal and societal challenges santoso 1 dr. lassen moreau fye section 17 3 december 2021 responding to personal and societal challenges at notre dame, an institution with an academic and athletic reputation, i am constantly surrounded by people with so much potential. although it is inspiring to see, it is also easy to feel inadequate in an environment with high-achieving people. as i have experienced, this is an unhealthy habit. this semester, i met people already involved in multiple research positions and internships. i frequently met students in my classes who managed their time so well that they had extra time to spend with friends or do what they loved. witnessing their work ethic, dedication, and time management skills were inspiring, but it eventually led me to develop feelings of inadequacy. i failed to recognize and give credit to myself for all that i have accomplished so far because i set my standards unreasonably high. i reached a point where i felt like i did not deserve to be at notre dame. imposter syndrome, which is very common among college students, makes us feel as though we are not worthy of all that we have achieved (what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it? by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). when others expressed the same feelings of inadequacy, i realized that what i was experiencing was normal. i learned that being surrounded by talented people should not degrade my self-worth but motivate me to improve in the areas that they excel in. i now see a great deal of talent present on campus as opportunities to grow. my life relationships have grown in importance. i strive to surround myself with people who have diverse perspectives and gifts so that i can grow alongside them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo santoso 2 over the past few months, discrimination has become increasingly apparent to me. in my psychology class, i learned that stereotypical negative attitudes lead to discrimination from ignorance, conservation of mental effort, social approval, and management of the self-image. my desire to live my faith with the hopes of improving the world has become more important to me. one of the reasons i came to notre dame was for the opportunity to deepen my faith alongside my education. christopher devon is the president of fordham preparatory school in the bronx, new york. he stated that in catholic social teaching, the concept of imago dei "holds that each human person is created in the likeness and image of god and is therefore deserving of dignity and respect”(should catholic schools teach critical race theory? by christopher devon, moreau fye week ten). this idea reinforces that god sees all of his children equally. our society could improve how we treat one another if we recognize that truth. this quote emphasizes that we are all morally obligated to see one another as our brother or sister, regardless of superficial differences. it reminds us to regard one other with the same respect and dignity that we would like to experience ourselves. i have become increasingly motivated to improve the disparities in our society. being part of the supportive community present at notre dame and the communities that i will encounter in the future have become very important to me. growing up, i was always an emotionally and intellectually independent child. coming to notre dame, i was used to managing stress, studying, and making decisions independently. throughout my life, i hardly sought help from my parents and friends. however, being quarantined due to the pandemic during my senior year of high school brought unexpected challenges to my mental health. at that point, i needed support— from my family, friends, and teachers. after years of navigating life on my own, it was hard to be vulnerable. during this semester, there have been several low points https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 santoso 3 that i could not get through alone— i sought support, understanding, and empathy from those around me. they empathized with my struggles, pushing me to realize how important it is to hold onto each other so that we can all succeed. parker j. palmer epitomized the lesson learned from this experience. he stated that “when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and criticism, challenge, and collaboration. the self-sufficiency i feel is a mirage” (13 ways of looking at community parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this insight reminded me that it is impossible to go through life alone. there is something beautiful about being vulnerable and humble enough to give oneself to others—to trust that life will get better solely because of the people around us. i am grateful to be part of the notre dame community, and i hope i can give others the support i received when i needed it the most. serving my community has grown in importance. i have become more knowledgeable about the issues that others face. in my psychology class, i learned that the shortage of psychiatrists prevents many people from getting necessary medical treatment. i also learned that there are no cures for any mental disorders, but only medications that reduce the severity of symptoms. as mental health is an issue near and dear to my heart, i began researching opportunities to get involved and serve the south bend community. i came across research conducted by dr. theodore beauchaine and dr. brooke ammerman in the department of psychology that focused on teaching children and adolescents emotional management skills and using technology to reduce risk factors for suicide. i hope to contribute to the research conducted in the suicide prevention initiative— research, intervention, & training in the department of clinical studies building, strategically off-campus and accessible to the community. in addition, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ santoso 4 i applied to be part of the notre dame medical observers (ndmo) program, which gives students interested in medicine to shadow a resident at memorial hospital in south bend for six hours each week. my desire to serve underserved communities has become a significant part of my life. i am motivated to pursue a medical career because of my passion for improving the lives of others. the paper “hope holy cross education” describes the life of father basíl moreau, who founded the congregation of holy cross. father james king, c.s.c. mentioned that “moreau looked upon the spiritual wreckage of his native france and felt called to become an educator in the faith” (“hope holy cross education” by father james king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve). moreau took the initiative to observe his society, recognize its problems, and find a way to improve it. i aspire to emulate moreau—to never give up in the attempt to leave the world better than i found it. by striving to make a difference, i would accomplish the goal of a holy cross education and build a better society for future generations. integration 2 word count: 1346 a semester of challenging my expectations, perspective, identity, and relationships i have encountered challenges when celebrating success. i thought i was going to struggle in college academically. i thought i was not gonna be smart enough to compete with every other smart student. however, this semester i have found success and joy in learning and studying. through all the hard work, i have been given amazing academic opportunities. despite these successes, i still doubt that i deserve them. this is a result of imposter syndrome. i have heard about imposter syndrome before but elizabeth cox breaks the idea down in the video “what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?“. cox explains that imposter syndrome exists when someone feels they are not worthy of their success or downplay the success that they have (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). everyone encounters this feeling regardless of occupation, race or gender causing many to feel like imposters in whatever they do. unknowingly, i have experienced imposter syndrome since high school. i often downplayed my successes as i did not want to look like i was bragging, hurt others feelings, or have people question why i deserved or received certain successes. the main factor for this was my consistent overthinking. throughout this semester, i have only become more aware of my overthinking. i always thought that everyone over-thought like i did. however, cox also discusses in the video that “everyone is susceptible to a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). after voicing my doubts with those closest to me, i have realized that, while many share similar thoughts or feelings, i overthink more than many of my friends and peers. since becoming aware of my overthinking, i have been able to work on my thought processes to enjoy moments more than overanalyze them. to help with this, i have also been working on lowering my expectations. julia hogan identifies that expectations often hinder individuals from living a fulfilling life as they try to achieve what they or others deem to be a perfect life, job, or body (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habits” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). due to the height of my expectations, many things do not satisfy my expectations leading to disappointment, fear, and stress. through reflecting on the way i react to experiences, i have realized that in order to celebrate my successes, i need to work on reducing the amount i overthink and lowering my expectations. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i have encountered conflict from those with different perspectives. while the nation is more diverse than ever, the nation is also very divided. reverend john i. jenkins, c.s.c. acknowledged in the “wesley theological seminary commencement” that “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other… both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by reverend john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). this polarization has led people to not want to cooperate and instead convict others. this has created a lot of violence and oppression. while i consider myself to be accepting and open to others opinions, this polarization has made it hard to have quality conversations with other people especially about controversial issues such as politics. in order to be able to respond in situations where i feel uncomfortable, i will use a “both/and” mindset as presented by christopher j. devron in his article “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?”. a “both/and” mindset connects many perspectives to make an inclusive solution (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten). this mindset stresses empathy for others' opinions and feelings. empathy helps to create deeper understanding in relationships and conversations as it allows people to be more aware of different points of view, experiences, and struggles. professor agustin fuentes supports this claim by stating, “exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change” (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). from these resources, i have deduced that to improve my responses in difficult or controversial conversations, i need to surround myself with many different people and empathize with others using a “both/and” mindset. i have encountered questions of my identity. throughout my first semester of college, i have experienced many changes. some of these changes have led me to question my identity. for example, sports have been a huge part of my life since before i can remember, greatly influencing my life, relationships, and identity. however, since coming to college, i have found it hard to make time for physical activities. this change has led me to question my identity and be frustrated by my lack of effort. this is related to ideas discussed in the book “the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis. in the book, she discusses the idea that as humans we will have peaks (high or happy points) and troughs (low or sad points) in our lives. lewis expands on this idea in the book by explaining that troughs “are merely a natural phenomenon which will do us no good unless you make good use of it” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this line is meant to https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188541?module_item_id=105321 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188541?module_item_id=105321 inform the reader that while times may seem hard or boring, you can still make the best of them and continue to move forward based on how you approach them. since being at notre dame, i have learned that perspective determines a lot. i have seen both positive and negative perspectives greatly impact how people view and act in different situations. for myself, i can notice a strong difference between the two perspectives. i know that when i have a positive attitude, i am more likely to acknowledge the good in situations. to help me to adopt this positive attitude, i will remind myself that the only thing i can control is myself, so to make the most of a situation or to change a situation i have to change my mindset or actions. i have encountered the importance of good relationships. i have always been an extroverted person that thrives the most being around people. however, i have learned that the quality of the people i surround myself with has a direct impact on how i feel about myself. after reflecting on many social situations, i have noticed a real difference between the moments i am with strangers or people that do not care about me and the moments i am with my closest friends that care deeply about my well-being. this has aided me in creating or maintaining relationships throughout the semester as well as in appreciating existing relationships. overall, i have learned that quality is much greater than quantity. in the article “thirteen ways of looking at community”, parker j. palmer discusses the idea of a true community. palmer explains that community is created through connecting with others (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). these communities are not always simple, but the article showed me that community is a gift not a goal that everyone deserves. i hope that in growing with my relationships, i learn to appreciate them and myself. having good relationships with others is important, but it is more important to have a quality relationship with yourself. in order to cultivate good relationships, i need to work on creating a solid foundation within myself. i will do this by learning how to balance alone time with social time. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ paper is on the way!! midterm integration throwing punches and caution to the wind going into college, especially a school like notre dame, i was intimidated by the caliber of students i knew i would find myself amongst, being far from home, and the nerves of finding out how i would fit in. through my classes and the people i’ve met here, i can definitively say that i am not the person i was when i got here over 7 weeks ago. in many ways i am still the same, i hope that the person that people perceive me as is the good qualities that i brought from back home, but i also hope the experiences that i learn are shaping me into a deeper person. i believe that i grow by opening myself up to new experiences. there is no doubt that i have experienced many new things here at notre dame. i've developed (good) habits, made new friends, taken classes that i’ve never had before, and tried new hobbies. one of the more notable things that i’ve devoted a lot of my time to is fostering relationships and participating in baraka bouts. when i think about it, many friendships have been made through the time i’ve spent in baraka bouts. coming into college, i knew i wanted to do something outside of my comfort zone which led me to join the boxing team. i've had so much fun so far, pushing myself both mentally and physically. it’s funny when i look back just a few months ago. i was a shy person who would not have done something as violent as this, especially considering myself a pacifist. however, my fear of the dreaded “freshman 15” convinced me that i needed something that would keep me active. it’s very easy to fall into things that bring us comfort, from food, people, and bad habits. early in the semester, i was hit with the reality that “we are the most in debt, obese, addicted, and medicated adult cohort in us history” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). i knew that i didn’t want to keep falling back into the same things and people that held me back in the past. thankfully, the people that i’ve met here https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be are ambitious, care about mental and physical well-being, and push me to be better. even in my dorm, i can tell that i’ve found my own community and a place where i can belong, not just fit in. a big group of us ladies go to boxing together and encourage each other to push through a tough workout. it’s so refreshing to finally find people who simply want the best for you as much as you want for them. “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week 4). i’ve found many people who i can mutally grow with and i hope that as my time at notre dame continues, the progress i make and the things i learn will be shared with others. while a big part of my time here is spent making friends, i believe that i am also searching for where i can best be myself and use my skills. i spent a lot of time discerning my major and sometimes i still feel like i am still figuring out what i want to do. through my classes, i’m learning how to balance time, interests, and really seeing what classes i enjoy. unfortuantely, most of my glasses are general ones that i have to take as a freshman. i like to think that i have a lot to offer as an individual. here, however, i’ve felt a bit of imposter syndrome. i know that i am capable of so much, but seeing others who have all the chances i have succeed sometimes makes me feel like i am lacking something. i’ve always been raised in a competitive culture, growing up playing sports, competing with my older sister, and mostly competing against myself. in week 2 of moreau, we watched a ted talk on the two inner workings of ourselves that are always at odds with each other. in our second week of moreau, we talked about how “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” david brooksmoreau fye week 2). my issue has always been finding a way to quantify my internal value. when can https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy/transcript?language=en#t-83396 i be satisfied with the things that i have done? something that someone told me is that i am always unsatisfied because i keep raising the bar. reflecting on my time here, i see myself raising my standards when i do well on a test, since i always believe i can do better. or when i am exhausted after a physical workout i always feel like i can push myself harder. that realization actually inspired me to sometimes take a step back and see how far i’ve come, to enjoy the places that my brain and my talents have brought me, and to appreciate the progress that i’ve made thanks to the help of others. my time here definitely hasn’t been all smooth sailing though. i’ve experienced stress, worry, and disbelief. when i start worrying about my grades, i think back to the reading we did in week 3, how i can’t “just settle for ‘getting the most out of this life’ (“faith brings light to a dark world” professor david fagerberg, grotto-moreau fye week 3). keeping this in mind, i’ve been able to push through rough exams and midterms knowing that i can still be my best self without letting grades define my self-worth. it’s no secret that notre dame’s campus offers us a bubble with an influx of cultures and stories. knowing this, i believe that i pursue truth by being an open listener. in week 7, we listened to a ted talk by chimamanda ngozi adichie on how “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story.“ (“the danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week 7). in order for others to know my truth, they need to know my story: my likes, dislikes, my history, and all the different experiences that make me who i am. i specifically chose notre dame, an 11 hour drive from my home state, specifically because i wanted to escape the incomplete stories that haunted me. i wanted to turn over a new leaf here, building my own story and letting people decide how they like me here. so https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?language=en far, i’d say it’s going well. i’ve developed many extrovert qualities that i didn’t have back in high school, but i am still the same girl i was back home, holding on to my roots. i referenced this in my poem from week 6: the place that i’m from/cannot be found on a map alone/it is the people and /the memories that make me/and tell the story of/ where i’m from” (“where i’m from,” moreau fye week 6). being far away from home, whenever i get to call my parents and friends from back home keeps me grounded and makes me a little less home sick. i think in this poem, i really stress how i am a culmination of the memories and the people that make me who i am. knowing this, everyone i meet, i try to learn their truth and let them tell their own story. i’m not perfect, sometimes i’m not the greatest listener or i still let my assumptions cloud my judgement. by being more inclusive and open to other people, i can create more opportunities for friendship and learning here at notre dame. i think this campus is a lot smaller than i thought it would be. i hope that here, i can “use who [i am], what [i] know, and who [i] know to help others. for that will take [my] life from success to significance” (“2021 laetare medalist address” carla harrismoreau fye week 5). i have endless resources here to pursue truth and see the different layers that there is to truth. i know that the world is not black and white, and i hope i can strengthen my knowledge to always pursue truth with a notre dame education. my time here at notre dame so far has been rewarding. i am excited for the future classes i will take, and i am grateful for the people i’ve crossed paths with in my class, in my dorm, and even friends i’ve made waiting for the stir-fry at north dining hall. i hope that i will continue to stick to my high standards while still keeping my morals, and i hope that my faith will strengthen as my knowledge grows. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame august 25, 2021 week 1 qqc – searching for belonging 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? one focus question in the syllabus that particularly stood out to me was; "how can i grow as my most authentic self". having moved away to a new country and environment only a few days ago, i think that it is extremely important not to compromise any of my beliefs or limit my personal expressionism in order to feel a sense of acceptance. instead, to grow authentically through this journey i think that it is important that i surround myself with other genuine and open-minded individuals as well as remain open to exploration academically, socially and in other areas of my life. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: how does society influence an individual's ability to attain a sense of worthiness and belonging? quote: "there was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, and the people who really struggle for it. and that was, the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they're worthy of love and belonging". i have selected this quotation from dr. brown's commentary because it provides a brief insight into how internal conflict and societal hierarchies work. in modern-day society it is a commonly accepted fact that self-worth is gained through the satisfaction and approval of others. this is exemplary through the number of "likes" an individual receives on social media, complements that others give to them, or if they adhere to the trending beauty standards. i think that it is important for society to change in this respect so that people stop relying on others to determine their feelings of self-worth or self-love, as they should come from within.   comment: dr. brown's ted talk allowed me to realize that i should work towards embracing my own vulnerability and using it as a strength as opposed to feeling embarrassed or weakened by it. the point made about vulnerability making people authentic causes the idea of vulnerability to seem much less frightening and even sparks a basis for connection since so many others are faced with the same feelings. it is now clear that feeling vulnerable is actually a sign of self-awareness and courage which will lead to an internalized worthiness and sense of love. typically, being vulnerable would provide the thought that it is easier to be manipulated or controlled, but this new idea of vulnerability demonstrates the opposite in that if someone is vulnerable and believes that they are worthy, they will not accept being treated to a lower standard. week 8 integration one notre dame: my community to grow while persevering i believe that my community should be aware of their privileges and representation in our society. growing up, i was not taught the importance of representation or privilege in america. my international school in taiwan had an administration that was almost entirely white and male. however, i didn’t realize how problematic this was until my sophomore year of high school. i had my annual trip back to california the summer before and had gotten to the age where i understood microaggressions. i tried so hard to be the all-american girl at summer camps, but still got treated differently. i didn’t have an accent when i spoke english, i followed the same trends, yet i was still different. i realized the white administrators at my school would never understand what the majority of my asian peers would experience. as a college prep school, part of their goal is to shape our success in going to university in america and navigating being a third culture kid. but, how would they know if their identity would never be second guessed? if they would always have the upper hand because of their appearance? my belief has led me to be aware, to research, and to be vocal about injustice. the articles and tedtalk we watched for week 7’s qqc reminded me of this experience i had. my favorite quote from chimamanda ngozi adichie’s speech was the one i picked for my qqc: “now, i loved those american and british books i read...they opened up new worlds for me. but the unintended consequence was that i did not know that people like me could exist in literature.” (“danger of a single story” tedtalk by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) i too grew up reading american literature where most of my books were about people that didn’t look like me. my ap us history class was structured in a way where we learned mostly about the white male figures in american history. it wasn’t until i researched on my own and took the history of minorities in the usa course my school offered did i know there was more than just white men. like adichie, it is hard to know more if the single story you are told is so limited. when i accepted my offer to go to notre dame, i understood that i was going to be in a place where i would very much be in the minority. although there is still a lot of work to do and i would love to be part of that change, i would like to think that notre dame and the rest of america are slowly taking steps forward to teach the next generation important issues like these. as for myself, i definitely am not perfect at being aware of privilege or representation. i try my best to be educated about issues like these and other current events, however, i still have goals to be more active in reading the news and understanding more about cultures outside of my own. i believe that i am responsible for remembering where i came from as i grow in my college career. going to a university where you are in the minority or have a vastly different background from everyone else can make it difficult to find a balance between your roots and your surroundings. it’s easy and common to want to fit in with the people around you, and when there’s no one similar to you around, it makes sense to default to what other people are like to fit in. when raising my siblings and i, my parents made sure we were aware of our cultural background despite american citizenship. they made an emphasis on making sure we were able to speak mandarin so that we would not lose touch with our grandparents or other relatives that did not speak english. we celebrated most taiwanese/chinese holidays and were taught customs that relate to them. when i was younger, i hated learning mandarin. i thought it was unnecessary since i was going to an “american” school and would eventually go to the us for college. however, as i got older, i realized the language and cultural barrier that stood between my cousins that didn’t speak mandarin and my grandparents. i loved my grandparents and didn’t want something like that to happen. in week 6’s lesson, we discuss identifying influences and where we all came from. for the reading (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6), the poet discusses their upbringing and vividly describes where they came from. with my own poem that we wrote for homework, i wrote a lot about my cultural background and the very different environment i grew up in. the reason i wrote about this was because of how important it is to me to never forget about those roots because they were so crucial to shaping the person i am today. notre dame has challenged me in that i have had to remember where i came from and stay true to myself, despite how different the people i go to school are. although this is a challenge, i don’t think that this challenge is a bad one. in fact, i feel like it has encouraged me to be even more prideful of where i came from. it has made me love having conversations about where i grew up with people who are genuinely interested. my goal as of now is to find more opportunities for me to practice my mandarin so that i can maintain that skill. as of now, i haven’t found an outlet on campus for me to practice, but when i speak on the phone with my parents, i try my hardest to carry out the conversation in mandarin only. i also joined the tsa (taiwanese student association) at notre dame. despite it being a small community, it’s nice to see a group of people that look like you and have somewhat similar backgrounds to you from time to time. week 8 integration one word count: 2247 words excluding quotes right where i am meant to be over the course of the semester, i have been challenged to dive into the truth of who i am and what has helped shape me into the person i am and in order to determine and define my personal beliefs. i believe that i am a combination of every experience and every encounter i have had in my life. i believe that i grow by experiencing and truly feeling all of the emotions from happiness to heartbreak and anger to empathy. i believe that i am searching for fulfilling and purposeful relationships. i believe that my purpose is to help others realize their worth. overall, i have come to the conclusion that i truly do believe that i am right where i am meant to be. as a leader of my high school’s senior retreat, i was asked to write a reflection on the prompt who am i? i remember while i was watching brené brown’s ted talk, i couldn’t help but think about my retreat experience every single time brené brown mentioned vulnerability. vulnerability was a major component of my school’s unitas senior retreat. one of the requirements for a retreat leader was vulnerability. brené brown put it perfectly, “connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives. this is what it’s all about” ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). brené brown’s focuses on the idea that vulnerability is what can and will ultimately lead us to connection. without vulnerability, how could we ever possibly form a true, deep, meaningful connection with someone else? my retreat experience really ingrained in me brené brown’s argument for the need of vulnerability. writing my reflection for my retreat was truly an incredible experience for me because it allowed me to see sides of myself that i never really thought much of or paid much attention to. i reflected on how i believe that we become littles bits and pieces of those who surround us and those who are maybe longer in our lives. likewise, i believe that every experience of mine has helped form my identity today. who would i be if i hadn’t experienced the major friendship troubles i had leading up to high school, and how different would i be if i didn’t attend the high school that i attended? looking ahead, who would i become if i didn’t decide to join the notre dame community and where would my life lead me if i did not have the new amazing friendships that i have found here in this notre dame community. although i do not know where my notre dame experience will lead me, i believe that had i chosen any other path, that my life would be radically different. i attended a notre dame first year student send off picnic, hosted by the notre dame club of philadelphia. there, i met one of the most incredible people i’ve ever met, and now i am lucky enough to consider her a lifelong best friend. i am so incredibly happy and feel so incredibly blessed to have met the people i have met here and to have formed the most fulfilling friendships i have ever known. as i reviewed the content for week four’s module, i realized that my new best friend met all of the healthy relationship and friendship criteria. although the healthy vs. unhealthy relationship chart was focused on romantic relationships, i applied it to my friendship. my friend embodies all that a friend should and nothing that a friend should not. the quality that stood out to me that i believe my friend embodies most is honesty. in the short time we have known each other, we have grown to “share their [our] dreams, fears, concerns, with each other. they [we] tell each other how they [we] feel and share important information” (“text: healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). there is another girl who i now consider more of a sister than just a friend, and together we are putting ourselves out there and getting involved in clubs together to help us grow and learn more about what we want to do with the rest of our lives. through my continued learning that vulnerability and connection are necessities for us and cannot exist without the other, i have decided that what might be best for me is to get involved with campus ministry and get involved with retreats on campus because i know how incredible my initial retreat experiences were, and i believe that any further retreat experience will only empower my courage to be vulnerable. to grow, i believe that we must feel and truly be willing to feel all emotions. a couple of years ago, following a traumatic experience, i kind of shut myself down and shut off all my emotions, forcing myself to become numb to all things ranging from sadness to happiness and anger to empathy. it took me a while to get out of that stage, but once i did, i was able to realize how detrimental, dangerous, and unhealthy being numb to everything is. the realization that i had become numb understandably led to sadness. however, i was able to find joy in the fact that i was finally feeling sadness again. the stage of numbness did not lead to any personal growth for me, but the aftermath certainly did because it helped me begin to form my belief that emotions, even the “bad” ones are necessary for us to have in our lives because they allow us to grow. i believe that we can also apply this belief to our faith lives. for us to grow in faith, i believe that we must falter in our faith at times. cheyenne shared in her reflection, “i have recently learned that even times of spiritual desolation can be perceived as gifts because they invite me to evaluate my life in its current state and trust ever more fully in the god who loves and cares for me even when i am unwilling or unable to remember it” (text: "student reflections on faith" curated by campus ministry moreau fye week three). i believe that we cannot experience true happiness without also experiencing painful heartbreak. likewise, i believe that we cannot have true faith without having doubts occasionally. the concept of being unable to have faith without doubt and vice versa was discussed in my theology class in great depth in one of my friday discussion sections. together, we came to the conclusion that faith cannot be true faith without doubt. one of our arguments was that st. thérèse even doubted her faith at times. she claims to have temptations of atheism and is now considered a saint. as life goes on, my hope is that i continue to be okay with feeling all emotions, rather than just avoiding them and turning numb. i also hope that if my faith begins to falter, that instead of recognizing it as something bad, i recognize it as something necessary for growth and health. throughout my life, i have found myself continually searching for fulfilling and purposeful relationships, so i have come to the belief that in everything i do, i end up searching for these relationships and connections. the most meaningful relationship i will ever have is the one i have is the one with my best friend. he came into my life when i was at my absolute lowest, and he helped me more than i could ever even begin to explain to anyone. i am forever grateful for getting to experience a relationship as purposeful and special as the one i have with my best friend. i am also aware of the impact that my best friend has had on my life. he has influenced me in so many incredible ways. my group of friends and i at home spent many of our weekends together, and working on the where i’m from poem reminded me of all the times we spent together and strengthened my belief that i am searching for fulfilling and and purposeful relationships because all of my relationships with my home friends are ones that fill me with life and bring me nothing but happiness. they are truly life-fulfilling and meaningful. knowing now that i am searching for relationships and friendships that will fill me with life, i can engage in activities and communities on campus that will lead me to the people that will provide those relationships for me. i have already been lucky enough to find a great group of girls in my dorm, and i can get involved in things like campus ministry and service opportunities because people involved in both of those are typically the kind of people who i find the most amazing relationships and friendships in. i will forever cherish the relationships and bonds i formed with girls from my high school who were involved in campus ministry, like i was. another thing that i can do when searching for these life-fulfilling relationships is to avoid any bias i may hold against someone or a group of people because i may be able to find incredible relationships and friendships with the seemingly most unlikely people with the seemingly unlikeliness possibly stemming from some implicit bias or personal bias. in her ted talk, chimamanda ngozi adichie stated, “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity” (video: "danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i can try my best to not fall into the trap of single stories and meet new people with an open mind, in hopes that they might eventually become someone in my life who i form a purposeful and meaningful relationship with. my last prominent root belief is that i believe that my main purpose is to help others realize their self-worth. after a traumatic experience a few years ago, it took me until the spring of my senior year of high school to begin to realize my self worth and to get rid of my self blame that was completely unwarranted. like me, many people struggle with seeing their self worth. as david brooks said in his ted talk, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between external success and internal value. the tricky thing about these two sides of our nature is that they work by different logic” (video: “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). in my experience, i have encountered many people who have placed success over self worth and in doing so, lost complete sight and knowledge of their self worth. after experiencing my own revelation of my self worth through my first retreat, which was centered around training to become a retreat leader for the other seniors in my graduating class, i became determined to be a factor that led others to revert back to recognizing and acknowledging their self worth, rather than disregarding it, like i had done. as a retreat leader, i was able to create a community for my small group that was centered around learning to love oneself and gaining self respect and self worth. looking ahead and reflecting on david brooks’ wise words, i hope that i can continue to be someone that people rely on to help boost self worth and to grow in a way that allows others to strive for success without losing sight of themselves or losing respect for themselves. my belief that i am meant to provide help to others who have lost sight of their self worth has led me to be looking into applying for the notre dame vision program, where i could again be lucky enough to have the experience of helping to lead a retreat. while being there for whoever may need me and encouraging self growth, i need to be mindful to also remind myself and others that we cannot learn to love ourselves and realize our self worth without the one who loves us more than anyone else: god. as carla harris stated, “we cannot love the god whom we cannot see if we can’t love the brother whom we do see” (video: “2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week five). to be able to love god, we must also know how to love those who surround us. i personally struggled with this when i began losing sight of myself and my self worth. when i initially started losing my self worth, i began to push away the people who meant the absolute most to me. someone i pushed away the most was my best friend, who i mentioned earlier when discussing relationships. thankfully, no matter how hard i tried to push him away, he stuck by my side and helped me regain sight of my self worth and helped me realize that the people i was pushing the furthest away were the people i actually loved most in my life. by recognizing my love for those around me, i was able to recognize my love for god, and begin to recognize love for myself and my own self worth. the overall experience was very painful and heartbreaking for me to go through, so i believe that one of my main purposes is to help prevent anyone else from going through the things that i went through. for me, it started with little things, so now something i make sure to always do is whenever i hear anyone say anything slightly negative about themselves, i make it my goal to make sure that they know their opinion is not the truth and they have so much more to offer than they may think that they do. i have noticed one of my closest friends here is struggling with self acceptance and the idea of self worth, and i believe that we were put in each other’s lives for a reason, and i really hope that i can help her realize how incredible and worthy she is, even if she disagrees with me for the time being. i believe that i am a combination of every experience and every encounter i have had in my life. i believe that i grow by experiencing and truly feeling all of the emotions from happiness to heartbreak and anger to empathy. i believe that i am searching for fulfilling and purposeful relationships. i believe that my purpose is to help others realize their worth. after reflecting on my core beliefs and my past experiences and how i can integrate them into my new life here at notre dame, i have found that i am right where i am meant to be. ehi’s epilogue prompt: write your own eulogy ehioze lived in the moment, he did not waste his time in bouts of self doubt. instead he prioritized the pursuit of real goals and virtues. this notion of living in one's truth is expressed by the quote : “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down.” (“why we need to slow down our lives”) by pico lyer, ted moreau fye week one) meaning the people that are infatuated with being the most productive or profound in terms relating to life, are the same ones who preach taking things slowly. this contradictory notion is rather funny, due to the more meaningful experiences and joys that life has to bring would be formatted entirely. in an effort to live a life of an umbrella including true happiness, peace, and self confidence. do not get mixed up endeavors that only superficially elevate yourself whether professionally, financially, spiritually or mentally. in doing this we forget to cherish time for the gift that it brings. this is the first problem to tackle, on your journey to living well. the succeeding “step” is finding the motivation to live well. ehi recognized that in order to find the inspiration for such, a person must have a role model or system in place to provide guidance. as an undergraduate student at the university of notre dame, an organization he looked upon when in search of a figure could be the notre dame alumni association. specifically pointing to ms. paulette and her justice initiative with the eck school of law. evidence of the great feats noted in the domer dozen article “by reviving the school’s dormant club — at the time affiliated with the separate innocence project — as a second-year student in 2016, paulette laid the foundation for notre dame’s exoneration justice clinic, which provides law students real-world experience representing wrongfully convicted clients.” (“domer dozen”) moreau fye week two) a life well lived in the viewpoint of aristotle per ggl discussion course is “human flourishing'' or “eudaimonia”( the state of having fulfilled your potential and living well). growing up ehi’s family educated him on the importance of involving himself in things that reflect his character and establish his purpose, rather than wasting time completing actions for the sake of doing so. this promotes happiness and overall joy throughout life, which can provide benefits in ways unimaginable. the following quote provides an understanding of happiness: “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day.” (“three key questions”) by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). further magnified , being happy in what you do translates to multiple parts of life, it is not one dimensional but multi faceted. the inaugural “face” was within his education. emphasis on spirituality and academia to go hand in hand within his education resulted in him being humble, god fearing fellow, with impeccable character. with the presence of a chapel within his residence hall and the liberty of religion on the campus, ehi felt comfortable. the ability to express oneself in a new atmosphere, especially far away from home is not easily done but through trust in himself and most importantly god all obstacles were virtually eliminated. as an undergrad within the college of arts and letters his choice of major was political science. the thought of following in his fathers footsteps to enter the world of energy law and litigation was intriguing, but not his purpose. ehi wanted to use his notre dame education to give back to where he came from. as an immigrant from benin city, nigeria the journey to ascend and make his family proud was one of the things he wanted to do most and definitely did accomplish. seeing a “third world country” tarnished by corruption, greed and poverty the need to make a difference arose. likewise when in the us in his hometown of east orange, nj he saw some of the friends that he grew up with choose their own path and become subject to the concepts of incarceration, crime, and contempt. this truly fueled the fire and let him know the areas in which he wanted to discern his career. “it should be something involving legislature, public policy maybe? rebuilding the bridge between those in power and the governed.” taking this ideal further : “planning your life is like planning a trip.” (“navigating your career journey”) by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this was true, but with a strong character development story and amazing guidance from the undergraduate advisory department this dream was on its way to being a reality. the road to accomplishing what he wanted was easier said than done. a hard to swallow truth that came about was that his star at notre dame, although popular among his former schoolmates and superiors, wasn’t the absolute best. in a conversation with his mom while trying to reflect on himself, the question of when she saw a glimpse of him at his best arose. she responded “during your high school career, where you managed to graduate salutatorian and follow through in other pursuits that brought you joy.” (“week five reflection”) by ehioze aidaghese moreau fye week five). (funny to see how the theme cheerfulness is recurring eh?). however, this observation was only the beginning, for ehi the belief was that he had to maintain this same level of excellence no matter what. this was true on a personal level but not always literal. this was a top university full of young pupils that hold passion for higher education. it’s not through comparison with his peers that ehi saw accomplishment in himself, bit through self reflection and discipline. when a man sharpens and refines these tools it's in good effort but it does not stop there. this quote explains the dangers of just “thinking about steps without the correct action behind it. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective”) moreau fye week six) through knowledge of this i'm sure you could assume that ehi was a doer, not just a thinker. he involved himself in eva’s kitchen and other momm profit organizations to be an aid to people that needed it the most. i leave you all with the words of his holiness “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others.” by his holiness pope fracnis (why the only future worth building includes everyone) (moreau fye week seven) this is how ehi envisioned we can make the world a better place for all. trzaska prof. todd taylor moreau fye integration 2 3 december 2021 encountering new experiences life is full of new experiences, if you blink you just might miss them, and if you don’t think you will miss the meaning of them. throughout the first semester here at notre dame, i have encountered many new experiences and situations that have challenged the way i think, believe, and respond. my life has shifted some in what was important and what i understand as a student in this big big world. these new experiences are going to help to shape who i am as a person going forward and throughout my time at notre dame, everything that happened to me will be of great importance. one of the biggest changes when coming to notre dame was having to live in close quarters with someone you didn’t know. an outcome of the random roommate pairings for freshmen is that sometimes the people placed together don’t get along. luckily my roommate and i get along super well and will probably room together in the future, however, a couple of my close friends don’t have the best roommate situation. it has been very beneficial to see how they can work out their differences and also, even how they fail to. this failure to mesh is important to get talked through no matter what walk of life you are from, it won’t necessarily make you agree, but it will ensure you are on the same page. this parallels dissonance that will be encountered in everyday life. there will be things you don’t always agree with and people that get on your nerves but it is important to listen to everyone because you don’t know why they think as they do without listening. the most important tool to combat dissonance in your life is to listen to all. being broken, feeling that you don’t belong, and just overall feeling not prepared for life are all common feelings encountered throughout life. for me at notre dame brokenness came after one of my calc ii exams. despite putting in effort and studying more for the exam than i think i’ve studied for anything before, the results just didn’t show. this broke me because i was sure i would get a satisfactory grade due to the work i put in, but i couldn’t get it done. the quote from fr. jenkins really sheds some light on the positives of this failure, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed that you would end up where you are today.”(“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. jenkins moreau fye week ten). this quote provides a lot of solace to the reading. it reassures them that you had to accomplish where you got to, it didn’t just happen by chance. it helps signify that you are enough, no matter what failures one may have. (like failing a big exam) fr. jenkins is trying to communicate that despite the hardships that get in a person's way, it is on our own accord and strength that we made it to where we are. the thing about brokenness is that it happens so you can be prepared for the next hardship you face. a big aspect of notre dame is the community built along the way. within a person's own community it is important to know a diverse set of people and hear a diverse set of stories and beliefs. at notre dame, i was introduced to a larger variety of people than i ever had been before. all these people have unique stories and reasons why they were at notre dame. whether it was them living in california and applying to notre dame as a 2nd or even 3rd option, or someone who lives in indiana and has had countless family members come here, each person has a story to tell. “everyone has their own story and each must be heard as part of the larger story”(“with voices true snapshot summary” by klua center archive on race moreau fye week 11). this quote tells us that we must listen to all people and their stories in order to get a full understanding. this understanding will help ease the effects of racism and prejudice in the notre dame community. the story of notre dame is dependent on each of the outstanding individuals that go here and in order to avoid the conflict of great people we must listen to each other. after talking of hardships, brokenness, and prejudices it might be tough to think that hope can wrap into all this, but there is a way. hope is always able to be present when you look for it. as mentioned above, with the failed exam, it will make me better. hope stems from improvement and thinking that the next time something happens it’ll be better than the last time it happened. i am a firm believer that the hardships you go through make you stronger for the next hardship you face which correlates directly to hope. if you’re stronger and more prepared then chances are the next hardship you face the easier it’ll be to overcome, which gives me a lot of hope. here at notre dame, hope can draw strong correlations to faith, but it doesn’t necessarily have to. i feel that hope can be made stronger through a strong faith life, but hope is an independent entity and is something that a person could base their whole life on. as my time at notre dame keeps progressing i’m sure that the lessons will keep getting to be more and more. the lessons learned thus far have had a direct correlation to things going on in my everyday life. whether it be from getting along with friends, making new friends, or even personal struggles, they get covered and can be applied. i have encountered many new things and the basis of how to respond is laid out through each week of the moreau class. however, i think the message can be summarized through a few simple ideas. first, be open to communicate, second, be willing to learn, and third, be relentless in your pursuit of a better life for all people. integration 1 jack’s journey to the university of notre dame while thinking about what to write in this assignment i realized how open ended the directions were left, allowing us to express ourselves without being confined to rules and expectations we see in typical classes. with this in mind i thought about the theme of this assignment, what do i believe? what seemed like an easy response, actually left me wondering what jack schafer truly believes in? i thought about writing about my faith and why i believe what i do, yet i feel like that would better fit in a theology 101 class, however moreau is special to notre dame, something unique that no other university can offer, that's when it hit me. i believe i am here at the university of notre dame for a purpose, and i have yet to fully understand it. so i figured i’d start with a story, tie in some units we covered and express what i've learned in the past three months. so as you can see i am here at notre dame, well kinda, gateway is an experience, but that wasn't always the plan, ever since i was a child i wanted to attend the university of michigan, probably because i was bullied into being a uofm fan by my uncles or maybe because i constantly protected the university’s terrible sports programs by mentioning academics over athletics. whatever the reasoning, i really liked the university of michigan and that was always my dream school, so when it came time to apply to universities of early action uofm was top of the list, everything rode on that one letter i would receive back late february. after i received my acceptance letter from the university of michigan i was almost set on going there, changed the instagram bio to umich 25 but waited to commit until notre dame released admissions, and to my dismay i was rejected or so i had thought i had but as latare medalist carla harris, says “so you fail, but know this, failure always brings you a gift and that gift is called experience” ("2021 laetare medalist address" (carla harris) moreau fye week 6) i had thought i had failed , but i was in for one of the best experiences of my life. after sending my sister a screenshot of the email four hours later i got a text saying “you got in!” followed by a phone call describing the gateway program. however as time went by i just kinda neglected the idea of gateway, it seemed like more of an insult, and sometimes i felt like i'd rather be rejected. as the may deadline approached i was positive i would commit to umich, even after my gateway tour. it really wasn't until about the week before the may 1 deadline that i started to give gateway a second look, i started to pray about it, do some research but around april 28th i started to figure that notre dame is actually a better choice for two reasons, it’s a very catholic and loving community, with people just like kyle, who describes the typical notre dame student perfectly “ over my time at notre dame, i have sought to uphold that same commitment, helping others to see the truth” kyle from the class of 2022 ("student reflections on faith” , (curated by campus ministry) moreau fyw week three), students like kyle are the second reason i decided to come here, nowhere else in the world has so many people like kyle who truly want to be a force https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view for good. i joined the gateway groupme and asked why i should go to gateway, and everyone seemed friendly so i told my parents i was gonna go to notre dame and that was that. so a decision that took 3 months ended in 3 hours. i can’t be more thankful i made the decision to come here. it might not seem like a crazy story when i put it into words, but everytime i think about it i can't help but remember how lucky i am right now. while my brother and sister describe notre dame as “there is just no other place like it”. i truly believe it is the best university in america, while you might have a harvard or stanford where you have higher statistics, at notre dame you have kids that actually want to be here for the school, and the atmosphere, not just the name on a resume 10 years later. just like when david brooks said you live in perpetual self confrontation between the external success and internal value (“ted talk”, david brooks moreau fye week two ) the internal value of notre dame far exceeds any other university, while the external success competes with some of the highest universities in the world. my first week i was welcomed by numerous events and clubs and what seemed like an unlimited supply of food trucks, but more importantly i realized how nice it is to have a catholic based group of people, at a public school where i came from being catho lic or religious just seemed like a chore, but here people accept the idea that they are at a catholic school weather they are or not, they respect that fact kids here are here for their faith too. i personally believe that my being here is divine, hence why i still believe we're going to get housing next year. yes, classes are hard at both notre dame and holy cross, someone mentioned gateway year as an extension of highschool, however they couldn't be more wrong, people here actually are nice and everyone gets along and classes that were once easy are extremely difficult. but people just love it here, alumni, faculty, students, fans, and i'm still waiting to wake up from this dream because it's nothing like ive ever seen at any other university. whether it's the 9 o'clock north dining hall trip after studying in hesburgh, 12 o’clock grotto vibes, or the gameday tailgating and dorm parties and culture, i can't help but immerse myself everything the university has to offer, i couldn't imagine all the things i would say on my application if i were rewrite my application essays. brené brown said in her video, we have to be vulnerable to open up and really be ourselves, (“ the power of vulnerability ” by brené brown moreau fye week one) and i think this is extremely important, as college is a new beginning, its a chance to make a new identity how you want and nobody will know, you can be more open with people and they won't judge you, you can tell someone something, and if you never want to see them again, that can happen too, so being open to new people is almost needed to survive these first weeks of college to better understand people. before coming to college i had healthy relationships with highschool friends, i am from an amazing friend group of competent individuals (“ i am poem ” by jack schafer moreau fye week six) ( "5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by the grotto network moreau fye week four). we hung out and respected each other's boundaries, giving advice and help when needed. as i'm writing this i am also planning to visit them at their universities over fall break. as i look back on my decisions and look into the future i am reminded of when chimamanda ngozi adiche says “ power is not just the ability to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story o f that person” (“danger of a single story” https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109424 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109424 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109424 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109424 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story (chimamanda ngozi adichie ted, moreau fye week seven) this reminds me of how the ball is in my court right now, what i choose to do with it is up me, god has given me this tremendous opportunity to attend the greatest university in the world, and what i make of these next 4 years is my story to write and mine to tell. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story week 13 integration encountering my true self in indiana as my first semester concludes at notre dame, it is time to reflect on all of the experiences that i have encountered and made here. at an individual level, being inserted into a challenging environment such as this has forced me to escape from my comfort zone that was always present in brazil, where i knew and was friends with everyone at my school, as my graduating class had only 35 people. furthermore, this experience has also led me to respond to my own external and internal dissonance. in the first few months of college, i had great difficulty in making friends, and truly finding a community that i felt i belonged to inside the university. moreover, making things worse, i felt as if i was alone in this experience, as everywhere i went, people would always be surrounded by friends. however, after reading the articles from week 9 of moreau, i reflected on whether my experiences were truly that much different from what others were experiencing. this reflection was mainly caused by julia hogan’s words: “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). this quote particularly resonated with me, as i often set very high expectations for myself and whenever i don’t meet those expectations, i am very down on myself for, and even if i meet the expectations, i don’t feel any sort of validation from it, and feel as if i have just achieved a ‘commonplace’ task that shouldn’t get any praise or reward, as almost anyone could’ve done it. however, after reading the article, it made me realize that i wasn’t actually alone in this experience, and that many others here at notre dame were probably also experiencing the same thing, as me. further, i learned that all of my experiences also deserve some form of validation, no matter how ‘unworthy’ i feel. after several weeks at notre dame, i was finally able to find an authentic community where i felt that i truly belonged and that i could be my genuine self. i found this community within the brazilian community where, although we are from different classes and come from completely different backgrounds, we can bond over many of the things that we miss from home and partake in activities that take our mind off of the stress that we endure here. henceforth, after reading the articles from week 10, an aspect that particularly struck my attention was how can community make a positive impact in your life, and force me to have a positive change. this was discussed in kirsten hegelson’s video: “yeah, i’ve had vast ranges of people that are coming to the table to all look and approach kintsugi from their different kinds of windows and vantage points in life. everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto network moreau fye week ten). this quote stuck out to me because i truly feel that the brazilian community which i’m part of here at notre dame, has shaped me to become the person that i am and, overall, a better and more realized person, where i feel that i’m on the right path to success. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgjljeqd8gg&ab_channel=grottonetwork however, just because my presence in the brazilian community was having an overall positive impact on myself, it didn’t necessarily mean that i was having a positive impact on others and truly creating relationships with others. in a sense, i felt as if i was using the people in the brazilian community just for parties and hanging out, while i didn’t contribute much to them other than simply being there and having a mild presence. this experience was further exacerbated after two members of my friend group in the brazilian community had a falling out with several others, which caused a big divide amongst us in the group. however, after reading the articles in moreau week 11, i discovered that strife amongst friends wasn’t actually the ‘worst thing in the world’ and it could end up actually helping all of us: “ hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (14 ways of looking at community by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven). i found this quote particularly relevant to the situation that i was living as it’s a good reminder that it’s important to not idolize our community as being absolutely perfect all the time, and instead we should remind ourselves that fights and disagreements are extremely common amongst people who spend most of their time together and live so close, especially at notre dame where most of the activities are concentrated inside the school’s relatively small campus. this encounter with this train of thought in week eleven of moreau was particularly important to me, and it’s something that i believe that i’ll take for the rest of my life, leading me to become a more forgiving and compassionate person, and i expect to continue to develop those two traits in the future. in this path that i have undertaken here at notre dame to become an overall better person, i have learnt a lot about myself, however, there is one aspect about my life that i have neglected heavily my spirituality. although i didn’t specifically grow up catholic, i have had various encounters with catholic thoughts through my grandmother, and my main concern with religion and spirituality has always been as to how it compares to scientific thought and the ‘rational world’. however, after reading the texts in moreau week 12, i realized that this is not actually the way that key catholic philosophers think and that religion and ‘rational science’ can indeed co-exist: “both moreau and newman fully believed that grace and nature are complementary sources of god’s revelation and integral to human understanding. however, as the industrial and scientific revolutions advanced, they recognized that the tension between the dogmas and interests of the church and society were increasingly straining the traditional understanding that ultimate truth emanates from the creator.” (holy cross and christian education by campus ministry at university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). this quote particularly resonated with me as it significantly changed the way that i treated my spiritual side, and i currently believe that, aside from harnessing your mental and physical aspects, you must also improve your spiritual self in order to truly have a good and well-rounded life. https://www.dumbofeather.com/articles/14-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ miller 1 professor pruitt fys 10101 03 december 2021 integration two encountering and overcoming academic, social, and internal challenges since coming to notre dame three months ago, i have encountered many new challenges, such as those regarding school, grades, and overall academic expectations. academic life at notre dame is rigorous, unsurprisingly, and the rigor at nd has caused me to reevaluate myself as a student. in high school, i was a perfectionist through and through; i strove for the highest grades always, and i found it hard to feel fully satisfied with my performance on essays or other assignments. however, at notre dame these past few weeks, i’ve actively tried to alter this perfectionist mentality and have loosened the stringent academic expectations i previously set for myself. i have learned that bs here and there are not the end of the world, and criticism from professors on the papers i write or the lab reports i submit are not indications of a lack of hard work or complete misunderstanding. i have come to be much more accepting of “poor” grades and negative feedback, seeing both as opportunities for learning and improvement. i have focused on simply doing the best i can on every assignment instead of painstakingly striving for perfection and becoming upset with myself when i fall short. i have tried to embody the key messages in the “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” article from week nine, keeping in mind some of the questions the author of this article poses, like “instead of letting miller 2 your life be ruled by your own expectation that you have to perfect, what if you just did your best?” and “instead of letting your life be defined by the grades you get, what if you focused on living a balanced life full of friends, family, work, and leisure?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). by aligning my priorities more with aiming for my best (not my most perfect) self and recognizing that i need balance in regard to friends, family, and self-care, i have become better able to combat the academic challenges i face here and have formed a more mature outlook on school that does not hinge on perfectionism. becoming integrated in the communal life at notre dame has also posed challenges for me, but i believe i have moved closer towards discerning my place in the notre dame community. during week eleven, we discussed the value of community, and parker palmer outlines many of the benefits of living in community in his “thirteen ways of looking at community:” he defined community as “not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” and states that we “need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer – moreau fye week eleven). while i understand that the community that surrounds us shapes us and helps us grow, it is daunting to enter a school like notre dame that is full of talented, unique individuals. i struggled at first and continue to struggle with determining where i fit in and what contributions i can make as a student here. right now, as a first-semester freshman, i focus mostly on staying on top of my immediate commitments in school and trying to foster close friendships inside and outside of my dorm. going into the second semester and after, i plan to get more involved in clubs that i’m interested in, particularly those related to the medical field, and some of the service projects that nd students run in south bend. by getting more involved https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ miller 3 in activities that reach beyond myself, instead of primarily focusing on my own responsibilities, i can find fulfillment and feel more a part of the nd community. engaging more fully in what makes notre dame special—its close-knit and active community—will also expose me to more people’s perspectives and differing backgrounds. as described in the “diversity matters!” video, diversity enhances higher education in general because it allows students to interact with people that embody varying lifestyles, voice contrasting opinions, and see the world in a way that is fundamentally different from ourselves (“diversity matters!” by prof. augustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven). though notre dame is not a relatively diverse campus in terms of race, ethnic background, or religion, i think that there is rich diversity of thought at nd, and i want to learn more about the different values, interests, and goals of other people within the notre dame community. at the same time, i want to identify how i can contribute to notre dame, whether that be through service, spiritual life, or research. finally, coming to college has prompted me to embrace internal reflection in ways i never had before. i’ve come to value the difficulties i experience and recognize that periods of sadness and uncertainty are god’s way of helping me grow into a stronger, more adaptable person. navigating new friends and figuring out who shares the same values as me has not been easy, and there have been times where i was uncomfortable, felt insecure, and really missed my friends from home. i think that reading the excerpt from the screwtape letters during week twelve reminded me that these periods of discomfort and self-doubt are valuable, as “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that [the soul] is growing into the sort of creature [god] wants it to be” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). recognizing that difficult periods enable growth, i no longer resent the periods of discomfort that being a freshman in college inevitably entails, and i have noticed that each https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 file:///c:/users/21_bm/downloads/the%20screwtape%20letters%20by%20c.s.%20lewis_chapter%208%20(2).pdf miller 4 experience, whether in school or with other people, is an avenue for better understanding myself. for example, i have learned to recognize when my “social battery” is low and have become more confident in setting social boundaries, letting myself have some time alone instead of constantly forcing myself to be social. moreover, in addition to discovering more about myself personalitywise, i have reflected more extensively on and even challenged some of my beliefs since coming here. much of this reflection has been enabled by my philosophy seminar, where we question the relationship between god and us as humans and apply ethical principles to controversial topics like crime and punishment, abortion, and euthanasia. although i do not consider my opinions fully formed yet, i have moved closer to understanding where i fall on some of these issues. still, i want to remember the advice given by father jenkins in his wesley theological seminary commencement regarding the need to “call on our conscience to explore our convictions and how we express them” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten). father jenkins urges us to express our convictions with love to persuade others and not promote hate through forceful, schismatic language. i aim to work towards forming my opinions on the controversial topics that are heavily debated today, respectfully voice these opinions, and listen to those who think differently from me. after all, as jenkins makes clear, the way we interact with other people, particularly when disputed subjects are involved, has significant implications on the nature of our community and its ability to foster compromise and mutual understanding instead of ignorance, hatred, and division. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ elena que maria finan moreau fye 15 october 2021 value, perspective, and responsibility throughout the past month and a half, the moreau first year experience has invited me to more deeply examine my personal beliefs and ideas and challenged me to grow emotionally and spiritually. this experience has allowed me to not only learn more about myself but consider how i can improve myself and my relationships with others. after examining my main takeaways from the past seven weeks, i have discovered the core beliefs that shape who i am and how i make decisions. these relate to my views of myself, my treatment of others, and my perspective of the future. i believe that my worth stems from my inherent value, that i need to challenge myself both personally and outwardly, and that i have a responsibility to care for the well-being of those around me. i believe that my worth stems from my inherent value, not from the validation of others. in a world that measures external success so closely, it’s so easy to tie that to self-worth and believe that any value i have is assigned to how others view me. however, in “the power of vulnerability, dr. brown says, “you're imperfect and hard-wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this demonstrates that while i may not be perfect, that doesn’t mean i have any less worth. my flaws don’t determine how good of a person i am, how successful i will be, or how deserving i am of love. i didn’t always believe this. especially in high school, when pressure to perform well in order to have a bright future was so intense, it was common to assign my value to my test scores, grades, and gpa. one bad day could send me spinning and cause me to question https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&t=1s my worth altogether. however, struggles and mistakes forced me to realize that even if i didn’t do as well as i wanted to, i was still here and i still found happiness in other places. there’s more to life than those external measures of success and there are so many other ways to live a fulfilling life. in “the role of faith in our story,” fr. pete says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity and failure are an afterthought” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). while we never want to choose failure, it did teach me that i couldn’t place my value on how successful i was, because that’s simply unsustainable. how deserving i am of love does not change based on how i do on a test, or how much homework i get done, or what job i have. a few weeks ago, we were challenged to write a poem about where we’re from. this caused me to consider what had influenced my childhood and shaped me into who i am today. after doing so, i know i grew up in a place where i wasn’t any better or worse than anyone else based on how outwardly successful i was. what mattered more was i treated others and my attitude and actions outside of school. it’s easy to overlook, but where i grew up played a very meaningful role in shaping me. when describing my home during my where i’m from poem, i said, “it’s a small, quiet town in a flyover state//but it’s something special and it’ll always be home” (“where i’m from” by elena que – moreau fye week six). this honed in on the fact that i may have not grown up in an exciting environment, but i had a loving home that shaped me into who i am today. it may still be difficult at times, but that strong foundation formed my belief in intrinsic value. failures are a part of life, and despite my external performance, i continue to have inherent value every day. i believe that i need to challenge myself both personally and outwardly in order to form well-rounded perspectives. these are both important, yet in very different ways. as i said before, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://d.docs.live.net/06feec4207ebee7c/notre%20dame/freshman/fall%20semester/moreau/poem%20week%206.pdf our personal growth is highly important for our self-discovery, yet external growth also has a place in the world. in the video “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” david brooks says that “adam 1 is finding your strengths, and adam 2 is fighting our weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). adam 1 is more focused on resume-building skills and outward success, while adam 2 is about personal improvement. it’s important for me to still build up my external skills to set myself up for success in life and form good habits such as working hard, being perseverant, and organizing my priorities. in doing so, i’ll form a deeper appreciation for the effort that people put into their goals in order to support themselves and those around them. at the same time, adam 2 has high importance in forcing me to examine how i can improve myself and better care for those around me. it may not have a tangible measure, but it’s essential for building lifelong relationships and becoming someone that i’m proud to be. flaws are natural and a part of life, but it’s still important to consider how i can diminish them in order to be a better person. in my time so far at notre dame, i’ve found how important it is to have a good balance between being a dedicated student while still making time for personal reflection and growth. in the video “two notre dames: your holy cross education,” fr. kevin grove says that “if we’re really searching for truth, in whatever we study, then we need both faith and reason” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). this demonstrates the importance of balancing my conflicting ideas and developing both sides of my beliefs. faith and reason often tend to contrast each other and people tend to side with one or the other, but i need to challenge myself to integrate both of them to have a better understanding of the world around me. by pushing myself to improve both https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 internally and externally, i can have a better perception of the truth and a deeper appreciation of the world. i believe that i have a responsibility to do my part and care for the well-being and happiness of those around me. it’s easy to get focused on myself, because personal growth is important, but it’s just as important to channel that growth in ways that can benefit others. this strongly connects to being aware of toxic relationships and ensuring that i both don’t initiate one and that those around me don’t get involved in them. in the video “because i love you, double whiskey,” they say, “because i love you, you listen as i cry. you hug me and say that it’s okay. you take all the blame” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four). this is a common way to get caught up in an abusive relationship because people tend to blame themselves in order to diffuse a bad situation and make conflict go away. it happens subtly and naturally, and i have a responsibility to watch for situations like this. this can be hard for me at times because i’m a nonconfrontational persona and i tend to give the benefit of the doubt, but if someone i know is in a bad situation, it’s even more important to take action. in this way, i’m both improving myself by going out of my comfort zone and looking out for those around me. in another light, it’s important to be conscious of how i’m treating others when it comes to stereotypes and unfair assumptions. keith payne says in “how to think about ‘implicit bias’” that “[i]t would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure. unfortunately, we can’t conclude that: many of us are more biased than we realize” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne moreau fye week seven). although it’s sad to admit, we live in a world where bias is very prevalent, whether we’re conscious of it or not. even if i don’t intend it, i know that i also have biases that can negatively impact people in very serious ways. it can be uncomfortable to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ admit, but by first acknowledging these biases i can then begin to change them. in failing to do so, i’m letting down people i know and love and preventing both personal growth and societal growth. it’s not easy, and there are times that it’s uncomfortable both for me and for others, but i believe that i have an obligation and a need to care for others and treat them well. from my personal growth to my treatment of others, the moreau first year experience has opened my eyes to important beliefs that have become fundamental to my everyday actions. the way i view and challenge myself has notably changed and i’ve found myself becoming more conscious of how my attitudes can affect me and others. while it isn’t always easy to live out these beliefs and it takes constant reminders, it’s a constant cycle of growth and an important representation of how there are always new opportunities to improve and how i’ll continue to change in the future. integration #2 exploring myself and my surroundings instead of basing my response around the given questions, i looked at the past content from chapters 9-12 and saw two distinct categories of the things i’d take away from this second part of the semester. these two things were how i’ve grown as an individual and what i’ve learned about those around me, and these two things together encapsulate a lot of what i’ve learned both this second part of the semester and during the semester as a whole. i looked back to my first integration to look at the statements i had written for myself, and in modifying these statements to my current perspectives and reflecting on them, i think it says a lot about where i am at this point in time. the two statements i will redefine, one with regards to self-growth and the other with regards to what i see around me, are as follows: i believe that i have plenty of room for improvement (1st integration)/i believe that i need to be easier on myself and be okay with my shortcomings (2nd integration) building on my first integration and where i am with regards to feelings of shortcomings, i feel like i’ve come a long way this second half of the semester. in my first months at notre dame, i was harder on myself and expected myself to be a better version of myself than i thought i was at that point. in high school, i made sure to be as active as i could, and looking back that was both pretty exhausting and it set an unrealistic bar for me that i was expecting to reach at college. faced with the new challenge of college life, i found myself in an adjusting period and quickly found out that the level of involvement i was used to at home was just not sustainable here, and that was frustrating to me. i came in wanting to make the most of my time here, because i’d always been told that the “four years goes by so fast,” and to see myself not doing everything i set out to do was hard for me to grasp at first. i believe i’ve gotten better at both setting more realistic expectations for myself and also not letting my shortcomings drag me down as much as they initially did. i see a connection between these ideas and julia hogan’s discussion of expectation in a week 9 article. in talking about expectations, hogan notes that “when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” i think that this is certainly applicable to how i was initially feeling, as at points i can reflect on feeling like i wasn’t good enough to be here because of my personal failures to achieve what i set out to achieve, but now my expectations are more personalized to my lifestyle here having lived here for a few months now. i’m glad i’ve gotten past the stage where expectations were dragging me down and that now they are moreso a force to reassure me (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” julia hogan, moreau fye week 9). i see another connection to the kintsugi workshop video from week 10, where the artist makes sure to emphasize that everything within us is a part of who we are, no matter if it’s good, bad, embarrassing, or something we want to forget. just because something bad happened to us doesn’t mean we should be ashamed of it it’s a part of who we are and we have to accept that part of us for what it is. in my failure to live up to my expectations early in the semester, i think i was ashamed of myself and the way i was living: lots of staying up late, not being as productive as i should be, etc. every time i’d call my parents on the weekends, i’d just be reminded of how different i was living compared to high school and i’d feel uncomfortable discussing how i was living in college. this video gave me a sort of relief and sense of self-acceptance because we’ll all go through ups and downs, but that doesn’t mean that we have to be ashamed of who we are. i know that i can be more accepting of who i am and who i will become (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” moreau fye week 10). i am searching for a solid foundation (1st integration)/i have found an accepting and diverse community around me as i explore my surroundings (2nd integration) in my time here, i’ve also become much more familiar with my community and the various groups that make up notre dame. initially, i was searching for a solid foundation in finding my type of people on campus, and i’m glad that as i’ve explored through the community and tried my hand with various groups of people, i’ve found a solid core group that i can really count on. i still am the shy person i came to notre dame as, but i’ve learned to appreciate the company and friendships that i’ve made while i’m here. my friends are some of the most accepting and caring people i’ve ever gotten close to, and i’m really grateful i feel comfortable counting on them for anything. this ties into palmer’s article from week 11, which includes a sentiment of using others to better yourself; it explains how we need others for “comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” i’ve found during the course of my relationships with them, i’ve been able to enjoy quality time with them but also have them push me to be more physically and socially active even if i don’t feel like it; i never end up regretting it though. they are there to make me a better person, and i’m thankful they’re a solid part of my foundation here (“thirteen ways of looking at community” moreau fye week 11). i’ve also learned to appreciate the diversity a holy cross education brings to my time at notre dame. what’s unique about notre dame is that it’s not just an institution focused on academics; personal formation, faith, and community are critical to the notre dame experience. this was one of the reasons why i chose notre dame, as i felt the community wouldn’t be as cutthroat when it comes to academics and would be more supportive when it comes to my college process. the holy cross and christian education article from week 12 connects to this in emphasizing the five pillars of “mind, heart, zeal, family, and hope” as all critical to the college experience, and i think as i continue to explore i’ll be able to see each of these pillars present in my life more fully (“holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week 12). all in all, it’s been a great semester thank you so much! unfortunately i got stuck with a late registration time and couldn’t make my schedule work around your class but hope you have a nice holiday season! capstone integration restated mission statement my mission is to create happiness in the world. the world can be such a cruel and harsh place and i want to bring joy to others. i will seek to continue growing and changing because growth and change are necessary in life. i hope to live life to the fullest and make the most of every moment because nothing should be taken for granted. i aspire to always act with purpose. my actions should be for a reason and i think acting with purpose is one key to finding happiness and value. i will go through my life making sure my actions have meaning behind them. i want to be a positive influence for the people around me. whether it be my family, friends, or peers, i want to be a role model and a person that others look up to. i aspire to continue building meaningful relationships in my life. life can get lonely and i want to be there for others and others to be there for me. i also want to share my life with others and others to share their lives with me. i want people to celebrate the highs with me as well as support me through the lows, and i want to do the same for others. i value the life i have been given, but hope to continue to better myself. i want to be a force for good in the world and give back to my community. i want to face life with courage and purpose and live life to the fullest. i just want to be happy how my mission statement will animate my life for the next three years three years sounds like a long time, but in reality, it is not. my time here at notre dame will be done before i know it and i want to make the most of it. i hope to grow a lot, find my passions, become the best version of myself that i can. one of the biggest things i want to continue to practice over the next three years is mindfulness. this will allow me to fulfill the goals and standards i have set for myself in my mission statement. practicing mindful techniques such as meditation, practicing gratitude, taking a deep breath when you get overwhelmed, going on walks, and so many more can help clear your mind and calm you down (“mindfulness menu” by the mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week 6). these activities can also help you drown out the outside noise so you can center yourself from within. you cannot be your best self when you are always stressed or anxious. pico lyer says that “stress is contagious, studies have found. if only the poor, overburdened mother could ask her husband — or her mother or a friend — to look after her kids for thirty minutes a day, i’m sure she’d have much more freshness and delight to share with her children when she came back, and with her business.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). i want to keep this in mind with me through the rest of college because i need to take care of myself if i want to cultivate meaningful relationships with others. i truly value the relationships in my life and everyone around me knows how important they are to me. (“discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week 5). having relationships with others is extremely important. in a recent speech, pope francis claimed that “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i,” separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week 7). i, as well as everyone else, need others in their lives to support them, so they in turn can support others. i want to help build a community here at notre dame where we all support each other and work to create a better environment. i want to help make notre dame more inclusive by first starting with myself. i am not perfect and i know i have a lot to work on, but i want to help make everyone feel like they have a place here at notre dame by helping to break prejudice social structures (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10). i think that notre dame needs to look at things from different perspectives and work to become a more inclusive place, and i want to help do so. notre dame has so many resources so i hope to use them to create meaningful change that makes everyone’s lives better. (“i am george flyod. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. by marcus colemoreau fye week 12). i want to take these next three years to find what i am interested in. if i want to create happiness in the world, i need to find what drives me. i cannot create happiness if i am not happy myself. notre dame gives me the opportunity to explore many different classes and i want to take advantage of that opportunity to find my passions (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fyp week 4). i want to find true joy here at notre dame because “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). finding what brings me joy in life will help me create happiness in the world and act with purpose. i am inspired by former notre dame president fr. hesburgh and how he led a life of purpose. fr. hesburgh was involved in so many different organizations and communities besides just being president because he followed his passions and wanted to make a difference (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). i aspire to live a life like fr. hesburgh and hope that in my remaining three years at notre dame i can get on the track to do so. i want to continue growing and changing within the next three years. college is all about learning and evolving to become a better version of yourself and i think that my experiences at notre dame will allow me to do so. i don’t want to get stuck in an echo chamber. i want to hear all viewpoints and be open to hearing every side. getting tunnel vision and stuck in your ways and beliefs prevents growth and isolates you from others (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). i think participating in service projects can help me see the world from different perspectives. i want to do my part to help the community, but i want to be careful with how i go about it. professor steve reifenberg makes a great point that “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless… this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9). i think this is important to keep in mind as i serve others. it will not always be easy to live out my mission. i will face struggles in my time at notre dame, but i will persevere. college, as well as life, is about growing and there is never growth without challenges. i want to leave notre dame as a better person than when i started, and i want to help make the university a better place than when i started as well. moreau integration 3 december 2021 feeling at home many people, including myself have encountered imposter syndrome. in fact, one moment when i was hit hardest by this feeling was during my literature university seminar class. most students in that class are stem majors like me; however, many of them seemed very well-versed on the topic of our discussions: latin american poetry. i thought i didn’t belong in that class and felt a bit behind the program. elizabeth cox said that “the most surefire way to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). she explains that for the most part, imposter syndrome is a result of our own misconceptions and thoughts. she suggests that the best way to overcome this issue is to converse with others about such feelings. doing so can assuage the nervosity and pressure associated with imposter syndrome. openly discussing such problems creates an environment that gets rid of feelings associated with the syndrome such as isolation and unworthiness. one simply shouldn’t let their thoughts be bottled up within them and should turn to their peers and friends for support. regardless of the situation i’m in, i feel it’s best for me to turn to my friends and especially my roommate to talk it out. i also have been working on building confidence in my own ability, so in the future i’ll be surer of exactly what i’m capable of which will help me if i ever encounter more situations dealing with imposter syndrome. in fact, discussing such issues with fellow classmates and friends has helped me realize that i’ve become integrated within the notre dame family and community. parker palmer explains that “whether we know it or not, like it or not, honour it or not, we are embedded in community” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmermoreau fye week eleven). parker palmer teaches that we are all inevitably tied to our community. it’s useful to remember that at college, we deal with several members who are part of the same notre dame community. therefore, we must make sure to maintain a level of mutual respect when we experience conflict or dissimilarity with those who are within our community. mutual respect not only ensures that we don’t discourage others within our community, but also builds them up and can create stronger bonds between people. there was one instance on my floor in dunne when a fellow sentinel attempted to provoke me. he harped on the fact i was from guam and made derogatory comments about my island. the out of pocket insults he threw didn’t fail to annoy me; however, i knew it best to ignore rather than react to him. i revisited the event while showering and questioned why he decided to target me. in the end i figured treating him like a friend would normalize the situation. ignoring that outlier event though, i’ve managed to find a nice and welcoming community here at notre dame. however, when rifts occur within that family, i always make sure to treat others with respect which invariably strengthens our bonds of interconnection. father jenkins says “if we’re going to do battle with hatred, we have to accept for practical purposes that hatred is not out there. it is in here — ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by rev. john i. jenkins moreau fye week ten). many people often wonder why so much hatred exists in the world today and aim to fix it within others; however, they fail to notice that their own hatred often still exists and permeates into their actions and thoughts as well. there is only one form of hatred people can eliminate: their own. for the world to become a less hateful place, people must realize that hatred is within and often is masked as “self-righteous conviction” of others. i am often very self-critical of myself which occasionally leads me to develop hatred. i think it’s important for me to remember that i need to trust myself and need to learn to be patient while aware of how i can grow which will help me discard the hatred i possess. there was an instance in dunne where someone claimed there was free chick-fil-a in the lobby and many people including me stampeded down the stairs to grab a free late-night meal. unfortunately, we were all pranked, and i felt stupid for getting duped. i was even angry at the person who lied to us. my roommate begged to differ though. he argued that one would be stupid not to run for free food. he felt betrayed. i realized that i needed to be less hard on myself and needed to delete the hatred i felt to help rid hatred in general. one connection i’ve been strengthening over my time here at notre dame is my relationship with god. c.s. lewis wrote screwtape saying, “he relies on the troughs even more than the on the peaks; some of his special favorites have gone through longer and deeper troughs than anyone else” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). screwtape is explaining that god depends on people that are going through difficult swings in their life for their faithfulness. although it’s true that most often turn to god for help, god isn’t dependent on us but rather the opposite is true. disregarding screwtape’s message to his nephew, there is still truth to be gleaned from his message. humans rarely speak with god during peaks of our lives. one way to sustain hope for future growth is to more frequently communicate with god when we don’t need help. i find it very peaceful to go into the dunne chapel whenever i’m struggling with my problems in life. i’ve also been trying to incorporate a form of daily prayer before sleeping every night. this prayer helps me become more familiar with god and reminds me to stay thankful for the life i have. people often become blind to their problems when starved of hope that events turn out better. i struggle many times in identifying issues that set me back, but daily prayer with god helps calm my mind and clarify my thoughts because prayer then becomes more of a conversation than a plea. integration two fye catherine wagner integration two 07 december 2021 a look into first semester encountering dissonance when i first arrived on campus, i had the opportunity to meet hundreds of new people. everyone was looking for new friends, so i was able to quickly find people with which to spend my time. during welcome weekend, i met some amazing people in my dorm and we were soon eating every meal together and hanging out all of the time. however, i still missed my relationships from home. i was trying to recreate the years of friendship and growing together that i had with my old friends with these new people, even though it had only been a few weeks. i missed the people that knew everything about me, and i knew everything about them. my ol relationships felt more deep, while my new ones seemed a little bit forced and superficial. the reading from emery bergmann pointed out exactly my issue: “you can’t clone your high school friends” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). i was trying to remake all of my memories and relationships because i remember them very fondly and value them to a great extent. but, no two people are the same, and each relationship is very different. once i realized that my new friendships were just making up for the people i missed, my response was to evaluate these new relationships on their own. while i do still value these friends i made the first few days of school, i saw that their main purpose in my life was to fill in for my high school friends. since, i have made new friends that value me for who i am, and that i treasure for themselves completely separate from those people that i https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html knew before college. now, i feel truly connected to my college friends on a deeper level, not just out of convenience or haste. in the future, i will strive to see everyone i meet for who they are and accept everyone without comparing them to other people. encountering brokenness my sociology class visited the snite museum of art one day. one of the works we observed was called earth kid (boy). the piece is composed of a boy whose head is a globe that seems to depict the effect of global warming and a sack of trash on his shoulder. as i was looking at this work, the brokenness of the world was clearly conveyed. not only could i see the themes of wastefulness and materialism that taint society, but the piece also made me think of the other ways that the world is hurting. the boy appears to be struggling under the weight of the trash, and i think that feature points to the way that everyone is suffering trying to hold up some burden. we are all broken and weighed down in some way or another. yet, everyone tries to cover this part of themself up and act as if they are perfect. however, as the kintsugi video points out, “the things that they’ve experiencedthe good, the bad, the ugly, all of thatit has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grottomoreau fye week ten). our brokenness is part of who we are, and we cannot ignore it. i often try to avoid negative emotions and just move on, but this class helped me realize that i need to experience those too. in our suffering is where we can strengthen our relationships and grow in our faith. however, if we act like we are not broken, then we lose these opportunities for development. in the future, i plan to be more vulnerable and open with others about my experiences so that i can allow myself to grow from them. i also want to share who i am more truly so that i can help others who have gone through similar experiences or inspire people who are. while it may seem easier to ignore my brokenness, it is https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ part of who i am and part of our world. it cannot be hidden forever, and it can actually bring forth a beautiful outcome. encountering community since i have been at notre dame, i have encountered a variety of sub-communities within the larger community. all of my classes are their own community; my clubs are their own communities; my dorm is its own community. one class community that stands out in my experience so far has been my physics class. whether in making it to class on time or in getting through the lab, i have faced many challenges. in a sense, the professor is the leader of the community and the students are the members of this community. my professor utilizes a flipped classroom style in which we have to learn the material on our own and he demonstrates a few applications in lecture. this style of teaching forces the students to do more work and put in a considerable amount of time, which is not my favorite. palmer explains my dislike for this style: “we often resist leaders who call upon our resourcefulness” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j palmer moreau fye week eleven). i was honestly used to my teachers, the leaders of the classroom community, doing a lot of the work for us or walking us step by step through the process of certain projects and assignments. however, i have started to have to rely more on my own knowledge and strengths to accomplish my goals. as a result, i have grown to be a more disciplined individual who can work better with those around me. i have been able to collaborate with my classmates who are also facing the same struggles. we have all bonded and grown close through this experience, and i feel the sense of community generated by the choice of the class leader. while i do think i learn better when the professor teaches the material in class instead of us trying to teach it to ourselves without much prior knowledge, i can appreciate the community that has formed. i am now ready to take on my own http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ responsibilities in the future without expecting assistance from others. i can trust in myself to get through the challenges and be more open to facing obstacles by myself. encountering hope until the past month or so, i had been attending mass on sunday nights in my dorm. however, i have recently had something at the same time as this mass, so i decided to attend mass in the basilica on sunday mornings instead. i was amazed by this mass. i had never been in the basilica before, so when i went, i was shocked. its beauty and grandeur surrounded me. while i did also love dorm mass, the basilica mass feels more special and powerful to me. after i went the first time, i could not stop thinking about it for the entire week. i was so excited for next sunday when my friends and i would get to go to basilica mass again. while i have always enjoyed attending mass, i cannot honestly say i have ever been that excited for it. but now, it is one of the highlights of my week. god wants us to desire him on our own without forcing us to do so: “he wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand” (“the screwtape letters'' chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). prior to attending basilica mass, i attended mass mainly because it felt like the right thing to do, not necessarily because i desired to be there. however, i can now appreciate the sacrament for its beauty and intended purpose rather than out of a sense that i should probably go. i now notice more nuances in the mass and feel more connected to god when i am there. as a result, i have a more positive attitude towards each week and i can appreciate my daily life to a greater extent. in the future, i plan to invite more of my friends to attend mass with me because it can also bring them this sense of peace that i have found. i want to help others feel welcome and grow in their faith. by attending mass and inviting others to do so as well, i can live my life the way that god intended it to be lived. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188325?module_item_id=105117 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188325?module_item_id=105117 moreau first year experience integration two 3 december 2021 encountering myself: grappling with a new life experience in college i step off the airplane at o’hare international airport with my parents, who i have lived with and learned from my entire life, grab my luggage, pack into a rental car, and set off for a place i have never been, know nothing about, and will spend my next four academic years: holy cross/notre dame. arriving in south bend, my parents and i step out of the car, and it is unbearably humid and sticky. that’s new. i set up my room say goodbye to my parents and start meeting people from places and backgrounds vastly different from my own. they use different words, went to different types of schools, and think in different ways. that’s new. i go to bed 2,200 miles from the only place i have called home, unsure of what the future holds. that’s new. college is a drastic life change and represents a dive into new environments and a shift away from our comfortable and familiar lives. as we take this dive, we are left with a question: what do we learn about ourselves as our life changes rapidly, and how do we navigate the overwhelming burden of navigating this change through its many challenges? new and different experiences push us outside of our comfort zone, out of the experiences we have known, and challenge us to adapt and learn. to cope with abrupt change, we must ask questions about ourselves that we may never have asked. when we are in familiar territory, we know what to expect. we know how we fit in and what our place in community is. we have routines and comfortable relationships we have spent years cultivating. that is, we know who we are, at least within the context of our familiar lives. we seldom ask deeper questions of our place in the world and who we are since our well-established place in community answers those questions. we still often question our identity regardless of whether our situation is new or familiar, but it is easier to ask those questions within the realm of our known experiences. with rapid change however, our well-defined relationships, community identity, and the sense of self that we tie to those relationships and communities all fade instantly. the journey into the unknown serves as a challenge: with rapid change stripping away the security of our comfort zones, we are challenged to rebuild new communities, relationships, and senses of identity. this journey forces us to confront ourselves—to look at who we are, what we value, and what we have experienced and use it to accept the challenge of rapid change. as college students, we are embarking on the journey of self-discovery and adapting to what is, for many of us, the most drastic life shift in our lives. i, since that first night in my new bed—i will say that my bed at home was one of the hardest things to leave behind—have accepted the challenge and am growing each day in my unfamiliar environment. i have encountered new people, places, and ideas, but i have also encountered myself: i have asked questions about my identity, grappled with the challenges of leaving behind my old experiences, and have newfound clarity of the issues most important to me. most importantly, i have, in accepting the challenge of change, faced obstacles that have taught me the value of hope. one of the most difficult aspects of the adjustment to college is balancing the emotions of leaving home with the self-applied pressure that you must figure out everything early on. in her video “advice from a formerly lonely college student,” emily bergmann says, “understand that your loneliness is not a failure, and that you are far from being alone in this feeling. open your mind and take experiences as they come.” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emily bergmann—moreau fye week nine). i will openly admit that i was super lonely in the early days of the semester. i prioritize real connections in my relationships with friends, and it takes more than a few days to make build such connections. in the blink of an eye, i left behind the friendships i had taken time to build up and was left alone. i didn’t know any of these students at all and felt like i had little in common. some students seemed, at least on the outside, to have already made good friends while i was just trying to get to know people. i feel like i have strong social skills, but i am not going to just automatically spend time with people out of desperation. i honestly don’t have a problem with being alone, so i don’t feel the need to force friendships with people right away. i related heavily to emily bergmann’s quote. i was alone, but i knew it was not out of my own failure, but because friendships don’t happen overnight. at this point i encountered my first question of identity. am i the type of person who is insecure about social connection and will try to force friendships and fulfill some preconceived notion about college being the source of lifelong friends and endless parties starting in the first week? or will i embrace the challenge of loneliness, find the people i think are right for me over time, and keep an open mind about where my relationships will take me? i chose the section option in a heartbeat. once i embraced this perspective, i enjoyed being alone sometimes and spending time with people i genuinely liked hanging out with, rather than forcing anything. this attitude doesn’t mean i need to cut myself off and can’t continue meeting new people, but it helps me keep in perspective the fact that good friendships take time and effort, and i am not going to magically recreate my best friends from high school, which is impossible since everyone is unique. one personal experience that represents this idea is the fact that the people i enjoy spending time with now are people that i slowly hung out with more and more over time, not just random people that i hung out with on the first weekend. and it’s not just in college where friendships take time. it took time to form a relationship with the person i would call my best friend—who i was friends with throughout high school and who attends notre dame as a member of the swim team. we laugh to this day that we didn’t even like each other when we first met, but now i can’t imagine what my life would be like without his friendship. the point is that relationships take time. there can be pressure to make friends right away based on our preconceived notions, and people often portray on the outside that they have already figured out all their best friends and are having the times of their lives—but this is not true. i know i am not alone in my loneliness, and that it will take time for all of us to adjust to this drastic change. there are so many emotions that come with leaving out family and friends (and comfortable beds) that it makes more sense to not have things figured out than to magically adjust in a week. the perspective i adopted regarding social adjustment told me about my own social resilience, and has taught me to be patient, have an open mind, and embrace my new situation instead of stressing about social pressures or our initial expectations of what college should be. my experience so far in the notre dame community has also taught me about my own personal beliefs and what issues are important to me. growing up in a community that prioritized education about the racial inequalities that still plague our country, i have strong opinions about racism and prejudice. in my community back home, my peers received the same education, and i was exposed to similar ideas and empowered youths who engaged in student activism in response to many injustices in our country. however, i have encountered different perspectives on many social issues in my time here so far. issues are less frequently talked about, and there is more of a perspective of general human equality than taking immediate and aggressive action for change. i am not claiming to be an activist agent of widespread change, but as i discussed in my week 10 qqc, i believe that racism—both explicit and systematic—and how it is perceived in the public sphere is the most urgent issue in america. here i encountered a second question of my identity. in an environment where some people i have encountered, have had different perspectives on how to approach racism, how am i going to react? am i going to stand firm in my beliefs? or am i going to compromise my own beliefs based on new perspectives? i chose the first option, but not without at least listening with what others have had to say. i am not all saying that i have met a bunch of racist people or that the words from catholic speakers in the notre dame community are racist. i want to be extremely clear that i do not believe that. i just disagree with certain ideas on how racism is discussed and perceived, as well as what needs to change. in maintaining my own opinion while listening to others, i have emphasized a part of my identity that is resilient and true to beliefs that i think are right, while also being respectful of other viewpoints. in his wesley theological seminary commencement address, fr. john jenkins says, after quoting james madison, who speaks out against political fragmentation, “two hundred and twenty-five years later, we are like actors following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others. play the victim. blame the enemy. stoke grievance. never compromise.” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.—moreau fye week ten). while i agree that we must set aside convictions and work together to compromise, hear each other’s viewpoints, and be respectful when solving problems in general, i maintain that on certain issues, such as the history of racism in this country, we must keep our conviction and deny some compromises, since compromise has historically been a way of getting activists to shut up. for example, whites holding positions of power were open to “compromise” with martin luther king jr. if he were only less aggressive and more patient in his call for drastic social change. in my week 10 qqc, i did not focus on answering the prompt but instead getting my voice out there, a part of myself that i encountered because of my exposure to different voices. i would like to again note that i am not implying that people at notre dame do not understand this; i am just establishing that i have convictions and am also willing to listen and having debates that hopefully bring everyone forward to a better future. in my experience so far here, i have also encountered ideas on issues i have convictions about that have resonated with me. according to professor fuentes, “’race as we use the term and classification is not a reflection of biological groups; therefore, patterned differences that occur between what we call “races” are not caused by inherent biological differences in these “races”. they are due to social, historical, political, and experimental contexts are changeable.” (“diversity matters!” by professor fuentes—moreau fye week eleven). he discussed the power and importance of diversity in combatting racial prejudice, and therefore why it is so important to continue to work to improve diversity here at notre dame. combining week 10 and week 11, i encountered different perspectives on an issue i care about. they both have the same goal of fighting racism and racial inequality but seek to do so through different methods: (i) compromise and (ii)diversity and inclusion. compromise is important, but with the important caveat that if it fails or is simply attempted to resist change, we must take other steps. diversity improvement efforts for nd, resonated with me. my experience encountering these ideas, not only showed the beauty of a community of diverse perspectives and how they lead to discussions and arguments that give rise to new knowledge and ideas, but also turned a mirror on myself. since coming here, i have become more enthusiastic about issues of race and inequality and have learned that i am able to hold strong beliefs, discuss them with others, and listen to other viewpoints. finally, i have learned about how important hope is to me. in chapter 8 of the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis, screwtape writes “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemies will, looks round upon a universe from every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken and still obeys” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis—moreau fye week 12). when we are at our lowest and find the hope to persevere, there is no limit to what we can achieve. there have been times this semester where i have been unhappy with my situation here in the nd community. the housing situation, missing home, being sick, freezing weather, general low mood days, but through it all i have kept hope that i will continue to learn and grow as a person, especially in the face of adversity. one personal experience i have had with hope and perseverance intersects with another aspect of my identity: my high confidence. i have always believed in myself and my ability to achieve and dominate in things i do, whether it be sports, school, or anything. i have a huge chip on my shoulder coming here for gateway: nd clearly did not find me qualified enough to admit me, so i will show them that they made a mistake by dominating in all my classes. i am confident in my ability to do this, and it has been my hope in the face of obstacles that has kept me set on this goal. hope is also important in other facets: spiritually and emotionally hope also helps us get through difficult times, and it is these obstacles that ultimately make us stronger. imagine a plant growing in a forest. the forest has always been the source of water, sunlight, and nutrients. the forest is all it has ever known; its roots run deep in the familiar soil. but then one day, it is pulled from the forest and replanted in a garden. the new soil is different, and it seems as though the plants would have a hard time growing in the new environment. however, unbeknownst to anyone, the plant has the ability to grow in this new environment in ways that no one thought possible. the biology breaks down a little bit here, but let’s assume that the plant grows bigger, and the process of growing in new soil reveals abilities nobody knew the plant had. the point of my increasingly ridiculous story is that being uprooted from our lives seems scary at first, but can teach us a lot about ourselves and help us grow for the better. for me, it helped me realize my ability to keep an open mind about friendships and relationships and keep perspective on social experiences (week 9). exposure to a positive discourse of ideas taught me that i am strong in my convictions but also willing to listen and learn (weeks 10 and 11). and above all, it has taught me that hope is the key to overcoming challenges, growing as a person, and adapting to new circumstances…like a hopeful plant shooting its roots into rocky soil. cormac mc carthy moreau integration 2 cormac mc carthy moreau integration 2 michael comuniello 12/3/2021 my new life, home, and adventure. notre dame my first semester here at notre dame has been very impactful. i have met many new people, made some awesome new friends, moved over 2000 miles away from home and learned how to rely less on my family, grown as a person, and learned a lot about myself. i’m really thankful for the opportunity to see my world opening up to so much more. my biggest ambition coming here to notre dame was to see myself develop through new experiences compared to a boring life back at home. one of everyone’s initial worries before arriving at college is the sense of belonging. i really wanted to find a good group of friends who were like-minded people with me. at home, i never really felt like i fit in with the environment and i was always uncomfortable. thankfully, i learned to step out of my comfort zone and talk to people and i think i ended up finding my group. i also believe the overall culture of this school fits me well. however, i gained lots of perspective about others who have a tough time feeling like they belong here. one night, a girl from my accounting class sent me a random text asking if i could go for a walk. this surprised me. previously, i had conversations with her only about accounting. when i met up with her, she was distraught. she explained that she was finding it difficult to make friends at notre dame. similar to me, she had also experienced social difficulty in high school, and didn’t want to go through being friendless again in college. she asked me for help because she felt that i came across as a “social person.” this was weird for me to hear. i had never regarded myself as extroverted or having a social personality. in high school, i had two main friends. but, even then, at times, i couldn’t relate to them and i never branched out to other friend groups. the quote “i had been a pretty social person in high school and i fully expected to make great friends right away when i got to college. it’s supposed to be the time of your life, right?” (advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine) reminds me of her experience. she is really social and fun to talk to. i couldn’t imagine her having a hard time connecting with people and making friends. i explained to her the changes i made between high school and college, even though i’m still working on my friendship-making approach. first, don’t overthink what you believe other people think about you. when you overthink, your confidence dissipates and you’re less likely to be interactive. second, do not be afraid to ask others questions. the more questions you ask someone, the more you learn about them, and the more likely you are to find something you can relate to with that person. relatability equals relationships. finally, i encouraged her to join a non-academic club that follows an interest or hobby of hers. she’ll get to enjoy an activity around others who also enjoy that. that relatability would allow her to build some friendships. these actions are just a few things that each of us should consider each day to build a path towards belonging. one thing i love about notre dame is the sense of community; it’s unlike any other institution. parker palmer’s quote “this simple fact has critical implications: community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven) gave me a stronger appreciation for my community. i love my dorm, fisher hall, which has an amazing communal bond. our motto, “all are welcome in this place”, really represents us well and brings us closer. one of my best friends in my dorm is bisexual. he told me that he wasn’t really accepted back in his hometown, which was a really republican area. his life was surrounded with trying to be converted to being heterosexual and it put a really bad burden on him and made his mental health struggle. he explained to me how he’s so thankful for how welcoming fisher hall is. he feels like he fits in with the community. we all appreciate the gift of our community. as we grow older, i think it’s important for me to represent the community to students coming in after us to keep our dorm’s great value alive. one thing i have encountered slightly at notre dame is racism. notre dame is a primarily white school and i’ve heard that minorities don’t feel well respresnted. two asian-american students in my dorm have been subject to racism. i’ve seen several individuals confuse the two because “they look the same” or people like to joke about their stereotypes. the quote “this engagement rejects an approach in which catholics would appeal solely and simplistically to scriptural injunctions, such as ‘love thy neighbor as thyself,’ as an adequate response to racism” (should catholic school teach critical race theory by christopher devron moreau fye week ten) stood out to me. we should love all neighbors here at notre dame and not make anyone feel left out. i’m glad that moreau classes bring up the topic of racism because everyone should be educated about it. i think a lot of racism happens simply because people just don’t understand that some things said can be offensive. for me, i want to be a voice for antiracism, call it out when i see it, learn more about it, and hopefully educate others about it when i can. notre dame has allowed me to experience my faith again. i grew up catholic, but the last two years, before college, i was really distant with god. c.s. lewis said “humans are amphibians--half spirit and half animal. as spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time.” (the screwtape letters chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i think he’s right. by giving more time to my faith since i’ve been here, i’ve found myself more peaceful. quite often, i go to my dorm’s chapel and just sit and stare. by letting my spirit be in the presence of god, i find myself having an overall better wellbeing. i’m glad that i encountered the lord’s love again and i will continue staying with him. integration #3 pierpoint 1 professor retartha moreau 4 march 2022 “she was a good person who did good for others” brooke ashley pierpoint was a compassionate woman who cared deeply for the wellbeing of those around her. she genuinely wanted the best for everyone. she volunteered her time in attempts to better the lives of others. she believed in people even when they couldn’t believe in themselves. she made a positive impact on anyone she encountered and challenged them to be the best person they could be. when prompted to write my own eulogy, i first thought of the topic’s morbidity, but then i reflected; my death could actually be much sooner than anticipated, and i want to be remembered as a good person and did good for others. i yearn for a “life well-lived” where passion, compassion, and love define who i am. when i think of a life well lived, i want my god given gifts and passions to drive what i do, not the potentially appealing, external, superficial motives. while watching dr. rene bermea’s speech she advised the viewers to “find what drives you, and let it guide your path” (“2021 domer dozen honoree: dr. rene bermea ’12” by dr. rene bermea moreau fye week two). i find myself to be very fortunate as i have already found what drives me: helping others. i have also found where my passions lay: medicine. by combining my passion and my motivations, i know that a profession within the medical field will enable me to live a life well-lived. at times, i have struggled with this potential dream as there have been multiple obstacles that have served as an impediment in achieving this aspiration. for example, the anxiety i face on a daily basis can prevent me from acting on what i want to do and it hinders my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dhde_x1s-wu pierpoint 2 ability to push myself to further heights. my learning disorder has provided a barrier to the way i learn, as i have to sacrifice more of my time to study and understand the material than the average person. however, despite these challenges the cliche “tough times build character” serves to be true in this specific situation. in my eulogy, i want my “life-well lived” to encompass both my passions and motivations as well as my attempts to conquer each hurdle and, with that, i learned life lessons that i took with me throughout my life. furthermore, with each difficult situation faced, it is imperative to take a step back and reflect. while completing the “pause for reflection activity” (“pause for reflection” by mcdonald center for wellbeing moreau fye week 1), i recognized the importance of reflecting on past experiences. through reflection, i am able to break down previous difficult situations and learn from how i responded to them. additionally, reflection has proved to help me with mental stability and maintaining a healthy emotional relationship. in my opinion, i see this as an observable sign in my eulogy that i have lived a life well-lived because i am growing both intellectually and emotionally. i want to be remembered as someone who is wise and willing to change their perspectives from new, gained experiences. i yearn to be the person people ask for advice and guidance in strenuous circumstances; a sign of a life well-lived is someone who can take their learned experiences and help others in achieving their goals. with the reality that life is a finite amount of time, it is important to live life to the fullest. living each day with the intention that it may be the last is a methodology that i hope to implement throughout my life. while reading sister aletheia’s commentary on life, i found it important to remind ourselves that our lives are not this “continuing and continuing” existence, but rather that time is limited (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die”moreau fye week 3). when writing my eulogy, i want to look back at my time on earth and feel https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html pierpoint 3 confident that each day was filled with joy, kindness, and love. as humans, we understand that every day is not guaranteed, but we also assume that the next day will happen and even the next year. it is imperative to step back and reflect, putting our lives into perspective. i hope that in my eulogy, it can be said that i lived each day to the fullest, embracing the difficulties and appreciating the joyous moments. additionally, our lives are a collection of every small moment: “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (navigating your career journey by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). even, at the time, the most menial of experiences can offer the most impactful insight; therefore, i hope that i can see each and every opportunity as a way to grow intellectually and emotionally. a life well-lived is not just surmised by the large achievements or the most memorable moments but the little experiences that have just as large of an impact on who i am as a person. for my eulogy, i want there to be a good combination of both the small moments –– with friends and family –– to the large moments –– graduating notre dame and my first real job. no matter how big or small the situation, it shapes who we are; this reminds me to treat all experiences with the same levity as it could lead to morphing me into a bigger and better person. through life’s difficulties, it can be so easy to give in to those obstacles and give up; however, in my eulogy, i want people to say that “she faced each challenge with a positive outlook and always gave it her best effort.” while reading “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way moreau fye week 6), i recognized that suffering is a large part of life, but it is how we respond to these barriers, is what proves to be important. in just my 19 years of life, i have learned so much about myself and how i deal with hardships; i often give into my anxiety and this proves to be unsuccessful in dealing with difficult times. with time, i am getting better with responding to https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ pierpoint 4 trials and tribulations and it is this outlook that i want people to remember me by. having a toolbox to utilize when things go awry help to keep my mental health stable and allow me further my emotional iq as well as refraining from distancing myself from others. i want to be remembered as one who has a strong mind and can fight through difficult times while still remaining emotionally balanced. this directly relates to my relationships with others during my life. when father greg boyle talks about the importance of amiable relationships, i became aware of how important it is to have life-giving relationships throughout all stages of life (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8” moreau fye week 7). successful and quality relationships are observable signs of a life well-lived because it shows the mutual respect and compassion that each person has for each other. in my opinion, one way to understand a person’s integrity is to look at their relationships with others. after i pass, i hope that i can be remembered for the type of friend i was; a friend who was there for others, a friend who listened and cared deeply, a friend who passed no judgment, a friend who made an impact on those around her. in my opinion, a life cannot be well-lived unless you help others to become their best selves, challenging them to think differently and grow intellectually, socially, and spiritually. and through these deep connections, loved ones can also aid in my growth (week five discernment conversation moreau fye week 5). an observable sign of a life well-lived that can often be overlooked is also opening up to the special people in life and letting them know every part of you, both the good and the bad. because of these heartfelt relationships, i will be remembered as someone who forged life-giving connections and who had the ability to be vulnerable and open. brooke ashley pierpoint lived a life-well lived through her ability to act on her passions, live in the moment, learn from and appreciate past experiences, reflect on her well-being, respond positively to hardships, forge life-giving relationships, and be vulnerable and open to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/523975?module_item_id=167990 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit pierpoint 5 loved ones. she led a life of compassion where she truly impacted the world around her. brooke will be remembered for her big heart and her ability to help others live their lives to the fullest. week 8 integration one the human condition root belief 1: i believe that my purpose in life is derived from my experiences with others. one of my favorite ways to describe our lives, that i heard from one of my youth ministers, is that “we are a mosaic of all the people we have met and experiences we have had. i enjoy this thought because it connects everyone together. it proves that we are not all individuals on our own path, but rather highlights the impact that we can have on others and the impact that they can have on us. the great thing about being human is that we can take all of our interactions and experiences and pick and choose which ones we act on. we obviously experience way too many things for them to all have an equal impact on our lives, but the fact that we have so many puts an increased importance on the ones that we deem most important. we use these rankings and experiences to guide us on our path through life. a great example that highlights this form of ranking that we do to our experiences was the week 6 “where i am from” poems. when i first read “where i’m from '' by george ella lyon moreau fye week six, i thought that the assignment would be easy and i could breeze through it. once i started however i realized the depth and indecision in what i choose to put into my own poem. i was forced to pick and choose what was most important to me. breaking my poem down into three categories the things that are most important to me are: family, faith, and sports. it is amazing how simply i can tie these three main categories into what i want to do in the future. my goal is to one day be an orthopedic surgeon. my family has shown me how important it is to have strong people to lean on during injuries, unfortunately i have had a few and am actually currently writing this while in the waiting room for knee surgery. faith has taught me to help others. finally, i am a huge fan of sports and being able to help people get back to playing them quickly after injuries can have a huge impact on their lives. while my experiences growing up have affected what i want to do with my life, my experiences with faith have affected how i want to live it. i strive to live my life through god and for others. one of the best ways to try to live through god is by loving others and because god loves us, he wills our good. (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). in today's society, it can be so easy to get distracted and turned away from god, whether that be hanging out with the wrong group of people, drugs or alcohol, or desires such as greed or power. nobody is perfect, we all have our flaws and that is even more of a reason to follow god. i understand that i will never be perfect, but the conscious effort that i put in to be more like him is what leads to real internal change. additionally, by trying to live through him i have found myself surrounded by great people at the church of st. pats back home and at the university of notre dame. lastly, perhaps the concept that connects most with this belief of purpose derived from experiences is the topic of implicit bias. we were fortunate to listen to “the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven and get insight as to how our exposure to ideas can affect the way we interpret massive societies and complex concepts. understanding this “danger of a single story” can also illustrate the power of being able to experience so many things. our implicit bias is most dangerous when we do not have a deep enough understanding of an individual or idea and are forced to make assumptions, which as my 5th grade teacher said, make an ass of u and me. however, when we have that exposure and insight we are able to distinguish and analyze what we chose to act and base our goals in life on. root belief 2: i believe that i grow through failure and vulnerability. throughout my life, two of the hardest things for me to deal with have been failure and vulnerability. i was extremely fortunate to live in a great city, go to a great school, and perform at a very high level in whatever i set my mind to. i found the physical side of my life growing strongly but could tell my mental and emotional health was falling quickly behind. this dichotomy between my physical and mental/emotional health reminded me of the video “two notres dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove -moreau fye week five, and how notre dame not only focuses on the cultivation of the mind(physical) but also the heart(mental/emotional). for that weeks qqc, i chose to ask the question: what personal experience/story has had the greatest impact on your life? i decided, a bit ironically now considering my current state, to talk about my first major injury that occurred during soccer season. this was one of my first times in life where i was unable to do what i wanted and forced me to focus on other areas of my life. if it was not for this injury, this form of failure that led to finding new desires i would not be where i am today. luckily for me i am very very happy with where i ended up. secondly, in order to grow it is important to understand what our failures are and where we can be vulnerable. the via character strengths survey -moreau fye week two was fun because it allowed us to see which were our strongest character strengths but also which ones we needed the most work on. i was not surprised that my weakest was humility considering that is what i spend the majority of my time with my therapist talking about. i have always struggled with pressure from family and friends to be the best at everything that i do, anything less than perfect meant that “i didn't put in full effort” or “we know you can accomplish so much more”. this led me to feel the need to be the absolute best at everything and prove that to others in search of validation. i did not like the person i was turning into but found it difficult to be vulnerable and reach out. the hardest thing about reaching out to people to talk to about it was because the majority of my issues stemmed from my parents, and every time i tried to talk to them about it they shut me down and said they didn’t do that. it wasn’t until a church retreat that i opened up to some of my friends and youth ministers that i realized the true power of vulnerability. they helped set me up with people to talk to and let me know that i could count on them. these people turned into some of my best and closest friends and i was truly happy with who i was when i was around them. root belief 3: i believe that authenticity is crucial to forming life-long connections. finally, i will talk about authenticity and how i believe it is crucial to forming and maintaining life-long connections and friendships. similar to what i talked about regarding vulnerability in my previous paragraph, vulnerability is also essential for authenticity. one of my favorite quotes from the video “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one, was “when you ask them about love, they tell you about heartbreak”. this quote demonstrates how most of society today has become accustomed to flipping the narrative of a question or conversation. showing a form of authenticity but still holding back the answer to the actual question that was asked. i feel like it is easy to be vulnerable with the things people do not ask about because we know that is not what they are interested in; however, when they ask us about something personal we shy away from true authenticity. although we do not open up full to everyone, to those that we do open up to, we form a much stronger bond. finally i will dive into a recent real life example on how true authenticity helped repair and strengthen a lost friendship. i shared a little bit about this in the moreau i’ve fye week four searching for life-giving relationships comment section of my qqc but even since then there have been updates in our friendship. a quick summary of our relationship is that we were not on the best of terms and it was affecting the friendships around us as well. it seemed as if we could never have a productive conversation and resolve our issue. that is until literally last week when he called me to apologize and acknowledge the mistakes he made and actions he wishes he could take back. he told me that out of all our friends i was the one that was the hardest on him, but he realized now that it was because i truly cared about him. he thanked me for my authenticity and i did the same back to him. we both understood that without our honesty that we never would have repaired this friendship that was so important to each of us. integration 2 mcfail 1 áine mcfail mr. whittington fys 10101 3 december 2021 my journey of belonging at notre dame my time at notre dame so far has truly been an unforgettable experience. i have made so many friends, tried so many new things, and learned so much, not just in my classes, but in general as well. coming into the semester, i had a lot of expectations of what it would be like. in some aspects, it has been better than i ever imagined, and in others, it isn’t necessarily worse, just different. some of my expectations included having instantly made my best friends for life, getting perfect grades, and to never be in doubt that this was the school i should have chosen. throughout this semester, i have asked and answered myself a lot of questions. the biggest one is probably, “is this where i belong?” i had a rough start to the beginning of the year. this was the first time i encountered feeling as if i don’t belong somewhere. for weeks, all i wanted to do was go home and transfer schools. i really felt like this wasn’t the school for me. slowly, i started to feel better and that i did make the right decision to come here. then something would happen, and i would not feel that way anymore. it was this constant cycle of that. “their nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulationthe repeated return ro a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks,” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this truly is an accurate representation of my time here so far. over time, though, my peaks have gotten higher and my troughs don’t go as low. my peaks last longer and my troughs are getting shorter. i have learned that it is okay to not be my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486?module_item_id=106257 mcfail 2 happiest all the time here and that most people feel the same way i do at times. i realized that coming into college is something that is a huge transition and takes time to feel truly comfortable. once i had this realization, it became a lot better for me. i had put so much pressure on my experience here, that i just needed to release some of it to feel better. another aspect of my experience so far is that this is the first time i have encountered that even my best isn’t going to get me an a in some classes. this was difficult at the beginning of the semester because i am used to getting straight a’s , and oftentimes not even having to put in that much effort to get them. so, to come here and have to try really hard and still not get an a was really hard for me. “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i have realized that as long as i am doing my best work, it is okay that i will not have straight a’s. i am still learning and getting the education that i came here for. my need to be academically perfect has decreased since arriving here, but in a healthy way. i am still going to do my best but won’t be upset with the outcome of that. this is also my first encounter with lots of people that are all different from me and have had different experiences that have shaped them. back home, while we are all different people, most of us are still relatively similar in that we grew up in the same place and have had similar experiences. this was one of the reasons that i chose notre dame. i wanted to be surrounded by people who weren’t all similar to me. this has been an eye opening experience to see how different everyone’s lives have been from me. i hope to continue to experience and learn from this more in the future, as well. this has given me the experience of what it is like to be a part of a larger community. i have learned that “hatred poisons everything,” (“wesley theological https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ mcfail 3 seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). many times the disconnect in communities comes from the hatred of others and of being different. we should be embracing those differences, though, because we can all learn a lot from them. fortunately, i have not seen any hatred since i have gotten here. while, there likely is some present, i am just speaking from my experience so far. i feel like this has made it easier for a community to form. with everyone being so nice and welcoming, a community can easily arise from that. in my dorm, we have a strong community with one another and have gotten to know each other well. if there was a lot of hatred present, we would not have been able to do that. another aspect of community is understanding yourself. “if we want community in order to confront the unhappiness we carry within ourselves, the experiment may go on, and happiness—or, better, a sense of at-homeness—may be its paradoxical outcome,” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). if we can’t accept ourselves then we will have difficulty feeling accepted by others. i think that this is also why i felt like i didn’t truly belong here earlier. i was struggling with certain things on my own, which made it difficult for me to feel connected to everyone around me. i was doubting myself so i was never going to truly feel the community around me. this will be important for me to remember throughout life, as i will always be meeting new people and entering new communities. i have to remember that it may not be a perfect fit right at the start. in conclusion, i have grown a lot this semester. i have learned a lot about who i am and who i hope to become. i have learned that as long as i do my best, there is nothing more i can do. to truly feel a part of something, i must accept myself as a part of that first. i have also made lots of friends. after learning all of this, i do feel like i belong at notre dame. i also plan on taking all that i have learned so far and will learn in the future here and applying it to my future. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ fitzgerald moreau professor lassen 3 december 2021 encountering and overcoming new challenges in college in my first few months of college i have encountered many new challenges. being 12 hours away from home, i no longer have my parents and the rest of my family to help guide me. although they are just one phone call away, i don’t have the comfort of getting off the bus after school everyday to see my two dogs run towards me. adjusting to a college environment, both academically and personally, was definitely challenging over these months. the response i had to these new situations varied but as time progressed, i learned how to better respond to my encounters and help myself to both do well and enjoy notre dame. the first encounter i had at notre dame was with my navy rotc unit. two days prior to the rest of my fellow freshman arriving at school, i formed up within a one hundred person battalion for what was called battalion reconstitution. during the reconstitution, the incoming freshman and myself were given a whole list of expectations. we were told what gpa we needed to maintain, how many days a week we needed to go to pt, what our new jobs within our squad were, and several other expectations. if these expectations were repeated to me today, they would not phase me. i now understand the reasoning behind each and know that as long as i put in some effort, i can meet each expectation. but, at the time it frightened me. the days and weeks following i constantly wondered whether or not i was doing a good enough job. on top of the expectations i received from my unit, i also had expectations from my family and myself i wanted to live up to. when applying to colleges i set high expectations for going to a good school and making my parents and grandparents proud. when i was accepted off of the waitlist, i was ecstatic, for one i got accepted into notre dame and i was sure i made my parents proud. during the months leading up to school i was afraid that i wouldn’t be able to keep up with my fellow classmates when school started. i thought that everyone was going to be way smarter than me. but, i also didn’t want to disappoint my family and perform poorly. because of this, during the first few weeks of school, i pushed myself to work hard in order to make sure i keep up with everyone else and do well. at the same time, i constantly had a nagging thought that the other midshipman in my unit were performing better than i was or my engineering classmates learned how to use excel and solidworks faster than i was able to. looking back i now realize that i had what is commonly referred to as the imposter syndrome. the imposter syndrome is commonly defined as when someone has doubt or a feeling that they do not belong in a certain environment despite all of the reasons that got them to where they were. in the ted talk “what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox she states, “he (albert einstein) described himself as an ‘involuntary swindler’ whose work didn’t deserve as much attention as it had received.” (“what is the imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine) by using albert einstein as an example of someone well known that experiences the imposter syndrome, elizabeth cox does a good job showing her audience that this syndrome affects people who are truly accomplished. for me, this quote was significant because i have always viewed einstein as one of, if not the smartest person to live. oftentimes, i have heard people or even heard myself comparing someone to einstein when they say something smart or if they are doing well on a topic in class other’s are struggling with. by hearing that einstein experienced the imposter syndrome, i understand that this “syndrome” doesn’t just affect college students or people who are actually not deserving of their accomplishments. instead, it can affect anyone, no matter how successful. by the time we got to the ninth week of moreau i was not experiencing the imposter syndrome as much as i had at the beginning of the school year. but, being able to hear about someone distinguished from experiencing the syndrome, it reassured me that during the beginning of school, i was not the only one experiencing what i thought. during the first few weeks of school i encountered a lot of challenges. the majority of these were related to the concern i had because of the many things expected of me. the way i responded to these was by surrounding myself with people who were in similar situations. by working alongside other people in my dorm, in my engineering class, and in rotc, we were able to learn from one another and help each other to succeed. as father jenkins said, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guarantees that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back. even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father jenkins moreau fye week 10) there was nothing that guaranteed that any of us would end up where we are today. for myself and my fellow classmates, we were not born with the guarantee we’d get accepted into notre dame. we all had to work hard in highschool, and during that time, experience many things that made getting good grades or keeping a good mindset difficult. being freshman at notre dame, together we experience very similar challenges. these include adjusting to classes, being away from home, and finding new friends. when i realized this, it became a lot easier for me to conquer many of my challenges because i was able to conquer them with others, not just by myself. at the same time that i began surrounding myself with classmates that would help me out just as much as i helped them, i began to encounter people i did not get along with well. i went to a highschool with only 70 students in my class and because of that i tried to avoid causing any conflicts or being unliked by anyone because of the time i’d be spending with them during our four years. at notre dame, i used that same approach. parker palmer says “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as “enemy.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week 11) my classmates in my engineering classes, my dorm, and rotc unit are all people that i will be spending the next four years alongside. because of this they are all members of my notre dame community. if i perceive the people i don’t get along with well as “enemies” these next four years would be miserable. in order to overcome the challenge of getting along with these people, i find that listening is the best way to get along with someone. even through conflict, by listening to someone else tell you their side of their story you can gain two things. first, you are able to figure out why they feel a certain way and learn a little bit about them. in my past experience, but learning about someone you can understand better how they feel. in conflict, this may help to resolve conflicts because you may realize there is miscommunication or the two of you can compromise over the things you learned. the other thing that listening helps you to do is helps to build your friendship and connection. by showing interest by listening to someone wholeheartedly, they will most likely recognize that and appreciate it. along with that, it helps you to learn more about them and help you to build a good friendship. by doing this, this past semester i have been able to create relationships, even friendships, with others i may have gotten off on a bad start with. the final challenge i have faced is being hopeful for what is to come. during busy weeks, such as final weeks, it can be difficult to have hope. as cs lewis wrote, “we can drag our patients along by continual tempting, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better.” (“the screwtape letters” by cs lewis moreau fye week 12) lewis, by writing this, explains that temptation conflicts with your whole life choices because these temptations interfere with your will and life. because of these temptations it can be difficult to have hope because they can lead us to having false hope. this applies to finals week and other times during the semester where you face challenges because you may be tempted to go out on the weekends or find something other than studying to do. by doing this, it can hurt your hopes of doing well on finals while at the same time if you stay in to study all the time, it can hurt your hopes of having a good time in college. but, it is important to find a balance between these two things and most things in college. over the past few months, i have encountered many challenges. these included not thinking i belonged, not thinking i lived up to my expectations, having a hard time getting along with other students, or having contradicting hopes and temptations. overall, i found that by surrounding myself with friends who faced similar challenges, they could help me overcome all of them. i could lean on them for support and sometimes by just talking to them i’d realize i was not in this alone. i now have clarity about why i am at notre dame and why i deserve to be here, and know that any challenges i face in the future can be solved by taking a minute to step back and reflect in the same ways this course has made me reflect on topics just like the imposter syndrome. alejandro castillo 10/15/2021 moreau the roots of my beliefs i believe that i am searching for belonging at notre dame as i have just transitioned from high school in texas to college in indiana. this is not to say that i am not enjoying my time thus far at notre dame, but i want to have more close friends that i can turn to whenever and who will truly understand me. i suppose the best way to go about this is to be open when i talk to others and show my true self. this brings me back to week 1 when i watched brené brown give her ted talk on being vulnerable. what stood out to me the most in her talk was when she said “these folks, very simply, had the courage to be imperfect.” if we always put up a front of perfection, then we are only fooling ourselves and limiting ourselves. this goes back to how making meaningful friendships can really depend on how honest we are. i feel as if our imperfections are what make us who we are, what make our uniqueness, and what make our identity. adding on to my previous beliefs, i also believe that i forge life-giving relationships by finding a balance and understanding that relationships are not going to be full of good times. i say balance because dependence is unhealthy. i have learned this from the red flag campaign which gives us a chart of unhealthy vs healthy characteristics of relationships. specifically, one part says “dependence—one partner feels that he/she “can’t live without” the other.” we must be independent and open to sharing our gifts from god to everyone. plus, no one should have to go through a situation where someone threatens to hurt themselves if they leave their partner. it is not easy to move on from any relationship, but we have to be honest with ourselves. moving over to the fact that relationships are not going to be full of good times, i think it is important to have a faith based relationship to help get through those times. sometimes we cannot solve a problem, but we can be guided through faith if we are faithful. i believe that i grow best by focusing on not only my external self, but more importantly my internal self. this reminds me of david brooks’ ted talk about if we should live for our resume or our eulogy. the words that stood out to me were “we live in a culture with an adam i mentality where we’re inarticulate about adam ii.” to give some context, adam i is the external self that we are always worried about which leads us to want to conquer the world. this is a good thing to strive for greatness in life and use the gifts that god gave us, but this can end up in an unhealthy balance that ends up treating life like a game according to david. at this point we should stop and realize that all the material items that we gain in life will not really mean anything once we are gone. this is why we should focus more so on adam ii which is our internal self. fortunately, this is exactly what notre dame focuses on which is growing the mind and soul. i believe that growing our soul through faith in god can lead us to true happiness instead of temporary happiness that material items bring us. i also believe that notre dame helps me to understand how to live a catholic life. i learn more and more everyday when i simply see others doing acts of kindness constantly. it opens my eyes to realize that little things can help people in more ways than i thought. this brings me back to when fr. kevin grove said “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love.” serving in love is what this world needs, but we must start with ourselves. simply asking someone how they are doing or going out of your way to help a random person that seems to be struggling are some ways that this can be done. we should treat others how we want to be treated. i believe that i am made to use my education to make the world a better place. not everyone gets the opportunity to receive an education like notre dame’s. thinking back on my where i’m from poem, i explained that i am very blessed to have lived a comfortable life full of opportunities. i want to be in a position where i can have the knowledge to make a difference and provide opportunities for the less fortunate. this is what drives me to excel in school. sometimes it can seem as if having to study so much is the worst thing in the world, but in reality there are people living from paycheck to paycheck trying to support their families. i believe that i am able to be the best version of myself by being able to overcome challenges in life. the main thing that i always think to myself is “it is not what happens to me, but how i respond to what happens to me.” the main way that i respond to anything that happens to me is to look at the positives. there are so many positives in my life that i tend to forget about which i need to turn to and appreciate. another way that i now try to follow when i am in some sort of troubling time comes from a video with father pete. father pete represents our problems as knots. in order to get rid of a knot father pete says that we must be patient, understand that every knot is unique, and to remain hopeful. he also says we need help from others. this relates to me so much because when i have been struggling with a couple of my classes, i go to office hours until i understand the material. we cannot do everything on our own and we should try to use resources around us to save us from a lot of avoidable stress. i believe that through my education, i can truly find perspective which is essential for all of life. everyone is full of implicit bias and we must work to try to find those biases and address them to the best of our ability. i say this because in the article how to think about ‘implicit bias’, it says “it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” it is easy to assume a stereotype because that is the only thing we have heard of something or someone. through my education, i can learn why and how the world functions in all of my classes in different ways which only benefits me when i am out in the world trying to be a positive influence. fa21-fys-10101-107 nhat nguyen december 3, 2021 moreau integration two: living like the world is blind – brian tracy once said, “personal development is your springboard to personal excellence. ongoing, continuous, non-stop personal development literally assures you that there is no limit to what you can accomplish.” after having learned that personal growth is something that should be never-ending, everything that occurs to me i use to contribute to a life lesson or major experience on some level. once i began to live my life appreciating every moment, i began to start improving myself so that i could further become the person i want to be. in our ninth week in the moreau first year experience, we shifted focus to dealing with dissonance and how it impacts our lives. for this unit, i wanted to talk more about when set expectations become negative and how it can cause imposter syndrome. having watched the video that mentioned albert einstein’s and maya angelou’s feelings of fraud was incredibly eye-opening yet comforting in a very odd way. the fact that, “accomplishments at the level of angelou’s or einstein’s are rare, but their feeling of fraudulence is extremely common.” as a notre dame student, it is nearly impossible to stop comparing yourself to the rest of the student body that is so evidently amazing in every way. i recall coming to campus and already feeling very out of place and odd. when applying to colleges, i knew that notre dame’s diversity was a bit lacking, but i never thought it would be so mind-burdening and effective in making me feel small or inadequate. after spending more time here, and thanks to moreau, i was able to grow a bit more resilient to my negative thoughts as i learned to keep reminding myself that college is a bit of a difficult journey, so it is normal to feel overwhelmed at first, especially when it is such a drastic change from home. i have always struggled with comparison, so i just have to continue reminding myself that a mountain and the ocean are both beautiful, but they look nothing alike; similarly, two students are both incredibly capable, but they may experience struggles that are not the same. essentially, that week i was able to start learning how to start denying negative thoughts and replacing them with positive self-comments so that i could improve my esteem. (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine) during the following week in moreau, we began to discuss how we react when faced with adversity throughout our lives, especially within the community. i decided to delve into the aspect from this module where father jenkins speaks out about how “malice, hatred, revenge, bitterness, whether in us or in you, in our hearts or yours, are an abomination to the lord? be our opinions right, or be they wrong these tempers are undeniably wrong. they are the broad road that leads to destruction.” i focused more on this quote because the modern society we have cultivated around us is one that has become full of resentment and wickedness. i have never felt more vulnerable than when students at notre dame began to experience sexual assault or incidents involving weapons. it was then that i knew how increasingly dangerous this nation has become and so i wanted to maintain myself far away from those dangers as possible. as i was continuously faced with difficult situations, i made sure to remain loving, calm, and persuasive to avoid joining “the hateful world in it’s agenda to bring everything down.” the lesson i learned for my development this week was whether our opinions are right or wrong, we must be able to step back and compromise to prevent such foul behavior. (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father jenkins – moreau fye week ten) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ for our eleventh week, the topic at hand was how to strengthen our relationships with people even during conflict and how the evident racial inequality in our society continues to impact us. professor agustin stated, “we don’t accept inequality as a good thing, but it i present, but they’re not fixed.” i recall choosing this quote because it touches on the subject of the nation’s huge issue of inequality across various forms. it is not a secret that white males are more favored than any other gender or race and it has been occurring for countless centuries. race has always been such a huge factor in everything, though some continue to deny it or play blind to the fact; however, it can be clearly seen having an effect on minorities throughout history. for example, when there was so much slander towards hispanics simply because people kept saying that they were all illegal, drug dealers, didn’t speak english, stealing jobs, etc. at notre dame, there was a story a while ago that covered how a white boy killed another person and he was let off as not guilty. however, it was clear that he was at fault and there was constant discussion of his white privilege around our campus. this incident further demonstrated the racial inequality because if it had been any other race they most likely would not have gotten the same verdict. that being said, i also learned from this that it is important to not judge others so they can be treated as equals, regardless of their skin color or background. (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven) the final week of moreau we communicated about the importance of hope and how to maintain a persevering faith throughout adversity. the quote that was stated in hope – holy cross and christian education, “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place,” was especially enlightening. it embodies the whole purpose of learning while still remaining optimistic during a hard moment in life; it was so interesting to see it being said this https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 way because one would have never imagined that people are growing while retaining their faith and composure. when we begin to grow and experience personal growth, our minds and hearts are being cultivated because it takes effort to be able to move past things with an open mind to the continuously changing world that we live in without allowing ourselves to become malicious. as a notre dame student, i have come to learn a multitude of various things both academically and personally. i have not only come to experience my first semester as a college student, but i have also had a taste of adulthood and independence as well. while this semester was overwhelming and straining at times, i also recognize that there were exceptionally beautiful memories made that will last a lifetime. i have also been able to anchor myself in my faith which has allowed me to persevere after unfavorable times. a huge lesson i learned from this unit was that hope can truly save you from crashing and burning down, and this lesson will be essential to my further personal development as i will inevitably continue to face hardship. (“holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king – moreau fye week twelve) throughout this past semester in moreau, i have learned a lot about what it means to be a person who is constantly learning and growing; i am not at all the same person i was when i first stepped on campus, and i understand that i will most likely be even more different by the time that i graduate. it has been during this first semester that i have been able to truly ground myself in a stable manner that allows me to move between rough patches without being washed away completely. i have learned to foster more self-love than i ever had before, more motivation to remain level-headed, equality, and true faith. i know that i will work on myself and keep in mind the quote, “if the world were blind, how many people would you impress,” to remind myself that personal growth i achieve will reflect on the outside and how i treat others and myself; with this in my mind, i will be able to continue to make myself proud with the progress i made. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192591/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192591/download?download_frd=1 integration one learning to believe in myself integration one i believe that being vulnerable is the first step in getting involved at college. our qqc in week one was all about the power of being vulnerable. looking back seven weeks later, i realize now that i didn’t know a whole lot about vulnerability at the time. since writing that qqc, i have encountered many more times when i have had to be vulnerable. it’s funny because my question that very first week was how could we make vulnerability more tolerable? while it is often still uncomfortable, i have become much more used to it. bréne brown said in her ted talk, “vulnerability pushed, and i pushed back”, and i now find myself very much relating to this scenario (“the power of vulnerability” by bréne brownmoreau fye week 1). i feel incredibly vulnerable whenever i get homesick, which thankfully hasn’t been that often yet. i have learned in great amounts to accept the awful feeling and allow people to help you when you’re down. i also had to make myself very vulnerable in the first few weeks of school when struggling with my maths homework. i had to ask many people for help as i just couldn’t get used to the american way of doing maths. at the beginning it was hard to put myself out there as finding the coursework hard, but i knew it would benefit me in the long run. i am definitely reaping the rewards of being vulnerable now! i hope to keep going on this track of knowing when to ask for help because it’s so important. i believe that i can be an ambitious woman, while also maintaining my personal morals. our qqc in week two was all about self-knowledge and what kind of person we want to be. i remember that during this qqc i was majorly questioning who i wanted to be and what i was living for. even though i still don’t fully know yet, notre dame has already pushed me to balance the two aspects of ‘adam one and adam two’, from the brooks video, in my life (“should you live for your résumé or your eulogy” by david brooksmoreau fye week 2). for a project in my management class, we were tasked to work together in groups of six to help a non-profit organization. the project showed me that i could work hard and create a really strong project, all while maintaining what i believe in by helping a non-profit. our project was about wealth generation through forest gardens in the sahel region of africa. david brooks says that, “in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself”, and although that may be slightly dramatic for me, i certainly felt this quote during the project. at first my team didn’t want me in the group and then they rejected my idea! while hugely embarrassing at the time, i certainly learned to stand by my adam two morals and stand up for myself. i was making sure i got on that team. it is my plan to keep working hard but also to make sure i don’t get overlooked again. i believe that my faith is deepening while also being challenged at notre dame. our qqc was all about faith and searching for a framework in week three. over the last seven weeks, i have learned so much more about faith than i ever could have imagined. this has mainly come in the form of my foundations of theology class taught by my amazing teacher, professor yuan. we are dissecting the bible in ways i have never done before, and it has been extremely informative. when fr. pete said, “be patient, if you’re in a hurry faith becomes so much harder to understand”, and i completely understand this now (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick c.s.cmoreau fye week 3). every week in my theology class, i learn so much more about my ‘faith’, that i thought i had a pretty good grasp on. there is a vast amount i didn’t know and sometimes i find this leaving me questioning what i believe. just like students in the reflections from this week, i can already feel my faith changing here. i love going to dorm mass and the grotto and having this shared experience with everybody else. instead of just accepting my faith, i hope to grow and understand it here at notre dame and i honestly think this school is perfect for that. i believe that meaningful relationships are formed by mutual respect and supportiveness. week four was all about forging life-giving relationships and recognizing toxic relationships. in my opinion this was the most important week of moreau just in terms of what is important for college students. for the first time in my life, i can feel myself going out of my way at notre dame to make sure i am forming meaningful relationships. from the text on the five signs of a toxic friendship i learned that “a good healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward become better people” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t taylor, grottomoreau fye week 4). this is certainly i criteria i look out for in making new friends here. i think our friends at notre dame hold us up, whether that be physically during touchdowns pushups, or emotionally when we need support. because of this it’s so important to make sure we have friends that don’t allow us to fall hard. it has amazed me how notre dame students will almost go to any length to help you. as i mentioned above, i needed much maths help and i honestly found the amount of people willing to help absolutely incredible. it really goes to show that many people here want this mutual growth. my main aim for everyday here is to be as much of a help to somebody else that all those great friends were to me! i believe that notre dame, and mendoza in particular will teach me to become a servant leader. in week five my learned about fr. sorin leaving france to set up notre dame. it was extremely eye opening as to where our great school has come from. we also listened to the commencement speech by carla ann harris where she taught us all about the importance of being a servant leader in today’s society. she was an amazing speaker who actually helped me public speak for my management project that i talked about earlier. i watched her video again to gain confidence in what i had to say. her quote “to help anyone, anyway and anyhow you can, simply because you can”, (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harrismoreau fye week 5), is really a great indication of how to live and the more time i spend here, i believe to live like this is the notre dame way. here, we can see our non-stop drive to help in all the different dorm charity events. we, in breen phillips are currently preparing for hoops for hope where we play charity basketball, and the proceeds go to the sisters of the incarnate word. i hope that over the next few years i can learn about servant leadership, which we have already learned much about in my management class and put this education into action. i believe that where we all come from has shaped us into the people we are today, but i also believe that we all have the power to change if that is what one desires. in week six we all wrote poems with the title ‘where i’m from’ (“where i’m from” by george ella lyonmoreau fye week 6), where many of us wrote about our hometowns, families and hobbies. when we were tasked with reading our poems out in groups of three or four, i immediately found myself being vulnerable. our poems only had to be 200 words long, yet when i read the poems of those around me, i felt instantly connected to them. i learned so much about the two boys sitting right and left of me. it’s a hard thing to do to let someone read your poetry, but it’s a beautiful thing that they get to see another side of you. i also learned much about myself when writing my poem, it was almost as if i was unlocking memories of the past. once i heard other people’s poems, i could really see how they were in some cases shaped from home, and in some cases not. many people wrote about allowing notre dame to change them positively and because of this i know that notre dame is having such a positive impact on those around me. it is my hope that if i was to come back and write this poem in ten years’ time, that notre dame would be a significant part of my story. i believe that educating ourselves is the most important step in eliminating implicit bias and viewing world situations from a single story. in week seven we read an article about implicit bias and we watched a ted talk about the danger of a single story. the speaker in the ted talk taught us an important lesson in saying “i have always felt that it is impossible to engage properly with a place or person without engaging with all of the stories about that place and person” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, tedmoreau fye week 7). in my qqc i spoke about being guilty of viewing certain situations from a single story in the past. in comparison to ireland, there is a much wider range of culture and race in notre dame. i would say more-so at the start than now, but i was introduced to many new cultures, even america was new! i immediately had to catch myself whenever i would be stereotypical in my own head, but now i can label it by saying i am looking at the world from a single story. the material in week seven basically taught me to be open minded when encountering new people and not to jump to conclusions based off my own assumptions. this is hugely important in life and i will definitely take this advice forward into every day of my life as i grow older. i went to the terrence floyd conversation in the duncan student center and he spoke all about carrying love for everyone rather than having our own private judgments. it is in my education about the single story that i am hoping be able to grow from it. moreau report 1 stephanie rincon-brambila professor whittington moreau 14 october 2021 chasing the unknown when learning about the declaration of independence, it was established that “all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” (declaration of independence). growing up in the other america, where poverty was the norm, it always confused me why the declaration of independence stated that we were all created equal, when in fact there was this inequality that consumed our country. despite being born and raised in the poorer side of america, i grew up appreciating what i had and acknowledging the privileges i possessed. one of the more significant privileges i possessed was my freedom of religion, that i would be unharmed if i believed in certain beliefs or if i pursued a different religion. taking this privilege into consideration, i believe that god put me on this earth in order to chase the unknown. in our society, most people are afraid of the unknown, they tend to fear change. in most cases, people tend to be scared of the vulnerability they must have when facing changes. consequently, “the thing that underpinned us was this excruciating vulnerability. this idea of ‘in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen’”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). when i was applying to different universities, i was afraid of what would happen if i went out of state. my family would https://billofrightsinstitute.org/primary-sources/declaration-of-independence https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 2 not be around to offer direct support, i would be in a new place where i did not know anyone, and i would be off by myself for the first time. to be completely honest, i was afraid of what the future might hold, but i knew i had to be vulnerable in order to search for where i belonged. in order to gain this sense of belonging, i had to explore factors that were not necessarily known to me. i needed to have the courage to be vulnerable with others to build a connection with others; i needed to have the courage to explore the uncertainty of the future. eventually, i learned that my failures can be potential opportunities for me to grow as a person. i learned that i have limits as to how much i can work, and how to make the most out of every situation. dr.brown’s commentary is very touching since i believe as adolescents we have to be vulnerable in order to grow not only as students but as citizens of the world. eventually, as the time came closer to my high school graduation, i was uncertain about the future, of the things i could not definitely predict. for the past couple of years, i had been consistently believing that god put me on this earth in order to explore life and all its ups and downs. however, there were times where i would fall into the abyss of my past. david brooks once said, “through history, people have gone back into their own pasts, sometimes to a precious time in their life, to their childhood, and often, the mind gravitates in the past to a moment of shame, some sin committed, some act of selfishness, an act of omission, of shallowness, the sin of anger, the sin of self-pity, trying to be a people-pleaser, a lack of courage” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week two). we as humans, as a society, tend to stay hooked to every little mistake we have committed and the mistakes others have made. it seems no matter what we accomplish, there will be this sense of guilt and shame from one’s past. it is in our nature as humans to feel guilty, shame, and afraid of the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim 3 ‘mistakes’ and ‘sins’ we commit. when exploring my options for university, i knew i lacked courage, the courage i needed to stick with my decision, the courage to leave home for a completely different place. i was so overwhelmingly afraid of attending the university of notre dame since it was miles away from home, i was afraid of the unknown possibilities that could occur away from texas. however, the belief that god led me here, to explore a new, unknown environment gave me the courage to proceed with my decision; this belief gave me the courage to not be filled with guilt and shame for leaving home. when i decided to attend notre dame, i entered with the mentality that “ the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). it was evident that by attending an out-of-state university, i would be entering unknown territory, an environment that i had never been exposed to due to my lack of knowledge of the catholic faith. when i got my acceptance to the university of notre dame, i began to think that all the things that had occurred in my life were part of god’s greater plans for me. it was almost as if he was giving me a sign, indicating me, gesturing towards me that he would always be there for me no matter what decisions i had previously made. it was almost as if god was giving me a small push towards what my future could potentially be, to explore a faith where the love people had for him was so prevalent and admirable. in the short time, i have spent at notre dame i have learned to love myself despite all my flaws and the uncertainties i had about life. during high school, i had a friend constantly tell me “no one will ever love you as much as i do” (“because i love you” by double whiskey, one love foundation moreau fye week four). i used to believe that she was the one person i could always rely on, a friend https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g 4 whom i could call a sister. due to the close bond i believed we had, i was there any moment she needed anything, no matter what the circumstances were. however, whenever i needed someone to be there for me, it was almost as if i was a ghost to her as if i was invisible. eventually, i began to realize that she never loved me, she just loved the idea that i was at her disposal. this experience caused me to doubt why god had truly put me on this earth. had he placed me here to suffer, to become guarded to the point where i felt i could never truly trust someone? over time, i realized how irrational these thoughts were, that i had to trust that god had a bigger plan for me. i believe that god gave me the opportunity to face this trial and hardship to become a more caring and open-minded person when it came to facing the mysteries of life. after the hardships i faced during high school, i yearned to be part of a community that was there for each other, a community i could rely on. at notre dame, i have come to understand how much of a loving community the catholic faith has to offer. “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love,” meaning that the relationships one forms in the catholic community are genuine (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin groves, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). when i found out that the university of notre dame was a catholic institution, it was that final cherry on top to commit to this university. through the progression of my high school career, i began to withdraw from my family, friends, and religion. being raised as a jehova’s witness, i eventually began to feel as if my commitment to my religion was a chore, and as if i was an outsider in my own community. consequently, i stopped interacting with my church and stopped going to the reunions as a whole. my acceptance to notre dame made me feel as if god was shining his light upon me. through my short time https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 5 here at notre dame, i have begun to open up my walls and become friends with people who i would consider family. it makes me think that this was god’s way of giving me a second chance to reconnect with him. i believe that god was shining this light on a path that was unknown to me, begging me to take a leap of faith. as a human being, as a citizen of the world, “i come from the guiding hands of the lord, whose promise keeps me going” (“where i’m from” by stephanie rincon moreau fye week six). i believe that god keeps his promise of allowing us to reach salvation by giving me the blessing to keep learning about myself and others. during my time on this earth, i want to be able to get to know people’s stories, despite “how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of a story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi moreau fye week seven). growing up i was afraid to interact with people of other religions in fear that they would try to convert me into their religion due to the stereotypes i had heard. however, as i began to develop a more complex understanding of religions and how society worked, i became curious about what other religions had to offer. god has blessed me with this chance of exploring the catholic religion, the chance to explore a different path than the one i could easily predict the future of. in 2020, if someone were to have asked me where do you see yourself in the next year, i would have definitely not expected to be able to say that i would be part of a community composed of wonderful people. i truly continue to believe that god put me on this earth to explore the unknown, to take risks, to not stick with the path that was predetermined for me. for the rest of my duration here at notre dame, i hope to keep an open mind about the experiences i encounter and how my beliefs will continue to help me persevere through the rollercoaster that is life. https://docs.google.com/document/d/19ftlj3odimv0jegt6uxvm_tu5mrr6cxf-mcsrvdzjqc/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript?language=en “week 8integration one” webb 1 prof. polotto moreau se. 83 15 october 2021 you are your greatest friend and enemy i believe that i am my truest friend. in my time here, i have struggled to form strong and true relationships. a week ago, i did not feel as if i was “investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) with my friendships, and discovered many people’s true feelings towards me as they had misinterpreted my vulnerability as conceitedness. i could no longer trust them and had to “leave [the] friendship behind entirely” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i realize that i will not form a deep and intimate bond during my first few months here, but at the same time the realization still strikes hard. reflecting on this now, i am realizing that in my desperation to make new friends, i forgot about the most important relationship, me with myself. before i may be vulnerable to others, i must first be so with myself, and recognize my fear of being alone. i must build a strong relationship with myself so that i can trust in who i am as well as in my choices. if i lack confidence in my character before forming relationships, i will be doubtful of my choices when faced with uncertainty or conflict. i believe that true relationships can only be formed if you bare your true self. it is not up to me if others accept my true self, and nonacceptance allows me to move on with my vulnerability in search of accepting friends. i believe that to form true relationships, i must first be alone to discover my truest self which will bring me to people who accept me as i am and do not ask for change. however, i am https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ webb 2 never truly alone. god’s love always guides me and persists. knowing that i am a child of god helps me to find my truest qualities, morals, and virtues, and allows me to act and treat others in kindness and compassion. even in my loneliest moments, i recognize to search for others and comfort and heal them because i belong as a child of god who was made to spread love and joy in this world, and i believe that this is my purpose. i can grow to be my most authentic self through service to others. my intelligence and accomplishments are not the sole reason for my acceptance into notre dame. notre dame chose me for my character, resilience, dedication, and passions, because i wanted to use my intelligence to benefit others and i would do everything in my power to achieve it. remembering why i was accepted here reminds me of my true character, and helps me to grow as my most authentic self. i cannot give into my pride and successes, allowing my character to be compromised. no matter how hard i may get hit by others, i always must return their insults with kindness, letting negative thoughts pass though my mind. i believe that i strive for compassion and humility each day. my pride in achieving good grades should never overpower my want to help others. my successes should not superiorize myself over others. as brooks says, “most of us would say that the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues” (“ david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulo… ” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i wish to be remembered as a person, and not some distant factful historical character. the ccim club guides me to emphasizing compassion over knowledge in my medicine, a career which i hope to pursue. too many doctors are seen as distant; however, proper healing requires both of the mind and body, and i believe that i can start on this path today. i believe that i will become an autonomous, caregiving person, and that my community should build me up to help attain my fullest character. my community should exemplify virtues, https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim webb 3 and inspire me to change so that i may reflect those virtues. i have seen this uplifting community countless times in my own dorm, with my reliable and caring upperclassmen. i know that i am loved here and always have someone to confide in. i see their empathy, and wish to be that person for others. i believe that relationships should be rooted in love, they should “will the good of another” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). my ra reminds me daily that what matters most is not fiscal success, but my growth as a person both because of my studies and interactions. my desperation to belong might have been my enemy and have allowed others to control my character if i had not recognized the issue earlier. i believe that i will find supportive and uplifting relationships through my own with god. to search for life-giving relationships, i have repeatedly found myself going back to god, and seeking him at the grotto when i feel most vulnerable. i believe that building my relationship with god will guide me in my journey, and lead me to fulfillment. my hardships and joys have reminded me of my humanity as well as others’. i believe that everyone is worthy of redemption, and that we are all struggling and as lonely as one another. i believe that i must be kind, so that i can remind others that they are not alone. the most beautiful souls are not measured by their success, but by their courage. my courage will save the world and set an example for others. i will accomplish this through my relationship with god because what i “propose, god disposes” (“letter to the father general moreau” by father sorin, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/pages/introduction-to-week-5-identifying-narratives?modul e_item_id=108959 moreau fye week five). i believe that i am from the hope of a better world, from the hope of persisting in the face of struggle. i believe that i am resilient, and constantly avoid falling into the well of self https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=partner&utm_medium=promotion&utm_campaign=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/pages/introduction-to-week-5-identifying-narratives?module_item_id=108959 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/pages/introduction-to-week-5-identifying-narratives?module_item_id=108959 webb 4 superiority. i have had multiple opportunities to accept this trap both in my stem classes and in my interactions in my dorm. however, my experiences in my first two months have shown me to be a better person, and to take each experience as an opportunity to grow. as others have fallen into implicit biases with their perceptions of me, i constantly remind myself to always assume the better, and to make a constant and true effort to know my peers. i must get to know them first before judging them, and discard societies’ and other’s perceptions. i believe that i am equal and fair and invested in life, and that implicit bias was formed by others’ lack of effort to truly understand individuals, as it is more convenient to assume. this shortcut is “the consequence of the single story… [–] it robs people of their dignity” (“chimamanda ngozi adichie: the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). i believe that if i fall into implicit bias, i will become my greatest enemy and halt my growth as a person and child of god. my vulnerability was not always met with success, but i was met with truth. i believe that truth is leading me to grow as my most authentic self because i can choose to react in love or in self-service. my faith always allows me to choose love and interact compassionately with everyone. my faith guides me to form life-giving relationships because the love that i receive from my peers should mirror god’s love. life-giving relationships should have a genuine, true basis that is formed by honest knowledge of the other. my efforts to truly know one another allows me to understand their full story, so that i can avoid implicit biases. by these factors, i believe that i am love and progression. i believe that i am slowly discovering my true self when i am faced with struggles, because i can choose the path to god, and in doing so i become my greatest friend. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story webb 5 integration two schmidlkofer 1 maria finan first-year studies 12 october 2021 he was obsessed, so i will not be after a year’s quarantine, i was shocked to return to a daily community, first as a janitor at a veterinary clinic, and now as a student at a university. i encountered all of the social fears that i had before the quarantine, but i had been away from them for several months, and upon returning i experienced difficulty with knowing how to respond. at the veterinary clinic, i worried constantly about the quality of my work. homework assignments have explicit steps, and mistakes do not directly harm anyone. if i did not scrub a kennel correctly, a patient might unnecessarily get sick. the patient’s owner might complain to the doctors, and it would be my fault. the past few months at notre dame have been similarly novel and afforded me similar liberties, testing my judgment. important questions that i have asked this semester address the confrontation of dissonance. within the past four weeks, in a text message conversation with a friend from high school, i questioned the exact manner of a grateful response for having a college education. without disclosing too much of what is personal to him, my friend grew up in a low-income broken family and developed obsessive-compulsive disorder (“ocd”) during the start of high school. in this conversation, he had praised my high school academic efforts, an area with which he struggled, and i commented on equal access to college. simply put, people work harder than me at low-wage jobs. we share something of an ironic joke, knowing that i often avoid leisure in comparing myself to the underpaid and overworked. he told me that he used to think constantly schmidlkofer 2 about major global issues, and he developed compulsions to relieve the distress of this contemplation. in a text, he related that individuals cannot address such far-reaching problems if they cannot properly eat, socialize or complete their school work. trust your personal needs. my friend called into question my standards for myself. while week 9 discussed personal standards specifically in social contexts, as exemplified in college students, i often relate my dissonance to personal standards which rest on the aforementioned downward comparisons. frankly, most of such dissonance is evident in false or exaggerated personal standards. counselor julia hogan suggests, “instead of asking, ‘what should i do...what would my friend/parent/significant other expect me to do?’, ask yourself, ‘what do i want to do...what do i think is best?’ trust yourself” (week 9). hogan’s language has a superficial tone, but she prompts a necessary daily reminder of self-trust. as seen in my friend’s notion of self-trust, the impact of personal standards is not restricted to the individual if such standards prevent the pursuit of goodness. the challenges of notre dame’s community have grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far. during the moreau class discussion for week 10, we discussed issues of race and sexual orientation in the notre dame community. it is important to recognize the issues that groups of people face while also recognizing the dignity of the individuals involved. as devron points out, the matter of race is neither a zero-sum game between the oppressive and oppressed nor an inconsequential excuse for complaint (week 10b). in this view, my identity as white and heterosexual is not restricted to one of oppression. instead, i am called to help those who are different from me, open dialogue, find common dignity, and work against the poor consequences they face as parts of their identities. schmidlkofer 3 being that race and sexuality have not had intense impacts on my personal life, i drew a more introspective insight from the focus of week 10 on troubled dialogue in notre dame’s community. i considered the troubled dialogues that i have with myself. in a commencement speech, rev. john jenkins says, “hatred often hides in self-righteous conviction — where it can be seen as driving the effort toward a noble goal…it can hide from our conscience by entangling itself in our most noble beliefs” (week 10a). rev. jenkins uses examples of violence taken for the sake of the greater good. differently, in consequence of what he describes, i often reduce my dignity by believing that my self-worth flows most fully from the work that i do. investing effort to improve the world is a noble goal but not at the expense of human dignity. take note: a person is more than a laborer. if i reduce my dignity, i will not attend properly to the dignity of others. how we can connect during conflicts was unqualified but is now more nuanced. week 11 particularly addresses the conflict that arises among differing identities in the community, a conflict that relates to week 10 but which focuses more on resolution. in light of issues concerning identity within communities, there are the nuances of belonging to a community. for example, the individual is not lost, people do not need to submit to a leader, and not every relationship needs to be deeply intimate. throughout this discourse, i still cannot reconcile the tension between self-interest and community—especially concerning connection—but an understanding of this tension requires nuance. as with the prior weeks, my consideration of this topic focused on inward reflection. parker palmer claims that “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives...and when that person moves away, someone else arises immediately to take his or her place” (week 11). he explains that this is because we identify the most unfavorable parts of ourselves in such people. it follows that self-critical individuals might identify more personally schmidlkofer 4 unfavorable attributes in not only themselves but also other people. at the same time, those who hold little value for themselves might lack motivation for self-fulfillment and thus hold more value for fulfilling other people, the alternative being a wider lack of fulfillment. in light of this, the oversimplified biblical response might be, “do to others as you would have them do to you,” (lk. 6:31) which implies both a positive self-image and positive treatment of others. life and growth in hope were once ambiguous but now hold greater clarity. rev. james king describes hope, writing “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (week 12). while rev. king qualifies this statement, describing hope as a continuous process for global citizens, i considered his statement in a simpler, more theological context. the term sacrificial recalls the example of sacrifice for everyone, the perfect sacrifice, jesus’ crucifixion. in recalling this, sacrifice does not solely refer to giving up something arbitrary for something better yet still arbitrary. instead, sacrifice recalls the giving of everything you have out of love, a giving that is only possible through and in god. only god could give all of himself, so when we try to give we need the gift of his grace. while i reflected on this quote theologically, i still lack faith, but i believe that such a reflection gives hope more nuanced meaning than terms like optimism or dream. in confronting the dissonance of personal standards, affirming dialogues at community and personal levels, elaborating connections during internal and external conflicts, and clarifying growth and life in hope, i have constructively responded to the uncertainty inherent in my time spent at notre dame. i will strive to continue this response. schmidlkofer 5 moreau references 1. (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habi” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?u tm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau 2. (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten a) https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-comme ncement/ 3. (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten b) https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-sch ools-black-lives-matter-240792 4. (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 5. (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186731/download?download_frd=1 6. new american bible revised edition [nabre]. confraternity of christian doctrine, 2010. online. accessed at biblegateway.com. sullivan professor chan moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 sometimes, it just takes a change of scenery to find yourself “you are the expert on you.” (“where i’m from” george ella lyon moreau fye week 6) a simple idea, yet easily forgotten. before this year, i often struggled with self-reflection and discovering what my core beliefs consist of. however, especially from writing the “where i’m from” poem, i’ve been able to dive a little deeper into what i value who i am on the inside. “we often are not taught to recognize the sin within ourselves and how to wrestle with it” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” david brooks, ted moreau fye week two) i feel that this quote emphasizes one of the reasons i subconsciously avoid self-reflection to stray away from facing my faults head on. however, i believe that we, as humans, should be encouraged to face our faults and find the beauty within them. some of our greatest weaknesses can also be our greatest strengths if looked at from a different angle. one thing i often notice about myself is that i am always overthinking, sometimes to the point where it could potentially harm a relationship i have with someone else. despite viewing this as a weakness, i believe it can also be a strength. although i often overthink, i also radiate immense amounts of love and care for the people in my life and i don;t really view that as a weakness. it takes a lot of courage for someone to recognize their weaknesses, along with their sins, but when they do, they begin to grow. another belief i have is that faith is a necessary factor in my life and that i have matured significantly as my relationship with god has developed. “the most basic identity i have is in god..” (“student reflections on faith” cheyenne, curated by campus ministry moreau fye week three) as cheyenne mentioned, god is where our identity lies. before coming to notre dame, my faith was weak; i always did the bare minimum and found myself going through the motions of catholicism. although i attended a catholic grade/high school, i never felt the connection with god that i had hoped. fortunately, it is different here. my faith has grown tremendously since my transition into college and it has only been two months. moreover, i believe that faith should be approached by choice, not force. in high school, the choice had already been made for me, but as i entered this new stage of my life, my free will was put to the test. i had the opportunity to decide whether or not i wanted to continue my faith journey and develop a genuine relationship with god, without the pressure of my peers. however, i must admit my encounter with god at notre dame can not be entirely credited to my own soul-searching. i made a certain friend when i arrived here. she believes so strongly in the lord and her love for him and his works is evident in everything she does. she has inspired me to reevaluate my own faith and make the most out of classes such as moreau and theology:foundations. she is a primary example of the next belief i wanted to specify. i believe that relationships are an instrumental part in personal growth, as well as simply living a happier life. “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week 4) although this quote is slightly cheesy, the message is important. all relationships with friends, god, family, etc. are pointless unless you are both pushing one another to achieve your full potential. something i feel strongly about is to keep your standards high regarding friendships and relationships. i deeply believe that if there is an aspect of your life, whether it be a relationship or a career, that is not bringing you joy or growth, it is not worth wasting time on. our lives are too short to not always be striving for our full potential, with people by our sides that will help us get there. fortunately, the relationships i have made at notre dame are beyond incredible. there has not been a single person that has said they didn’t want to be here and i have not found a single friend that is not overwhelmingly supportive of my success. i truly could not imagine myself anywhere else. on another note, there is another aspect i have discovered while proceeding along my faith journey that i feel compelled to mention; uncomfortableness. to be honest, i never would have predicted the uncomfortableness that comes with developing a relationship with someone that you’ve never met. there is a certain level of vulnerability that comes with talking to god and it has been quite the learning experience reaching those levels. although my faith has undoubtedly been strengthened since my arrival, i still find it difficult at times to open myself up fully to god and pour my complete trust into him. “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one) what brown mentions is exactly what i have found to be a barrier in my life in the past, but that barrier has been diminishing as my time at notre dame has lengthened. the sense of community and belonging here at notre dame is almost tangible. as an example, this past weekend i attended a mass that celebrated the african american catholic faith. it was incredible and eye opening to me to see the entire community of notre dame together to perform a different type of mass. it also put into perspective that many african american catholics are deprived of their normal celebration of mass, and made me appreciate the inclusivity that notre dame strives for and achieves by activities such as hosting that mass. furthermore, i believe that the beauty of faith comes from the people and from a mutual trust in the lord, regardless of the type of mass celebrated or the denomination. “we cannot love the god that we do not see, if we can’t love the brother that we do see.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week 5) in my eyes, everyone is equal in god and god is equally as present within each of us. we must love one another as we want to be loved and fully envelop ourselves in the community that comes with that relationship. lastly, i believe in happiness. i believe in love and the importance of strong relationships. i believe in the beauty of the lord and his creation. i believe that every person has depth, whether they portray it or not. i believe that the formation of a community begins with trust and support. what i don’t believe in is stereotypes. as chimamanda ngozi adichie mentioned in her ted talk, “when we finally are able to look past the single stories, we can find paradise,” (“danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week 7). at notre dame, as far as i have seen, the community is strong and there is a constant emphasis on inclusion and support. unsurprisingly, i chose to attend the university of notre dame for the academics and the social scene surrounding sports and being a highly ranked university. ironically, i completely underestimated the sense of belonging i would feel succeeding my arrival and the love i would develop for this life i am now living. notre dame has unquestionably changed my life, and as mentioned before, it’s only been two months. stevenson ms. leis moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 one small step for a journey of a lifetime the beginning of my notre dame journey flew by faster than i could keep track. although, i am definitely not the same person that stepped foot on this campus in august. i was extremely nervous coming here, but now i have developed to be very calm, cool and collected. i’ve always been extremely hard on myself, but i was even more so at the beginning of the semester. i would beat myself up over every little mistake and compare myself to others. i always thought i wasn’t as smart or doing enough compared to my fellow classmates. in short, i had imposter syndrome big time. this carried over into the beginning of the semester, as i would get very upset when i didn't get a test score better than the class average. but i didn’t know imposter syndrome was even a real condition until i learned about it in week nine. learning that many people are subjected to this same condition from ms. cox felt relieving (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). now, when i make comparisons at times where i feel like i did not get the midterm or problem set score that i want, i recognize this syndrome which makes me feel better. also i was always a person who set high expectations for myself especially in my academics. even when one of those expectations were not met i would get down on myself about it. learning from ms. hogan to loosen the expectations i have for myself, and giving me more breathing room for learning from my mistakes proved to be valuable to me during my time here (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i still try my best to succeed in my classes. now if i didn’t get the grade that i wanted, but i know that i did my best, i am content. coming to notre dame has definitely been a bit of a culture shock for me, but not in the way that one would typically think. my public high school is known for its diversity, and that’s what makes it special. only about half of the school is caucasion. here, there is some diversity, but it's not to the extreme that i was used to. at times, i hear students who probably came from generally homogenous high schools make a racial insensitive comment. when i hear these comments i make sure to correct them, as it doesn’t matter if we are complete strangers to one another we are “woven” together in the same community (“wesley theological seminary commencement address” by father john jenkins moreau fye week ten). father’s jenkins’ speech from week ten was very inspiring. it made me realize how important being an active bystander in a community really is. at notre dame i try my best to make a difference for good in some shape or form. the video of the women breaking the pots and putting them back together was also inspiring (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” grotto moreau fye week ten). it showed me that there’s a healing component in entering and overcoming challenges with others. now, when i need a break or am stressed over my academics i tend to turn to my friends for help. going through these challenges with my friends at my side makes them that much easier. the conversation about diversity continued into week eleven. as a person who has experienced being a member in a diverse community, i try to immerse myself in groups of diversity. diversity really does matter, it exposes one to different ways of living and different cultures outside of their own (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). a lack of diversity may lead to an unconscious ignorance and bias to other groups of people outside of one’s self. at notre dame i have been making all kinds of friends from all over the world. i have learned so much about my friends’ cultures and home that i did not know before. it’s honestly fascinating. i wholeheartedly enjoy learning about other peoples. surrounding myself with people different from myself at this campus has made me a much more open minded person. i will absolutely keep following my curiosity as i hope to become friends with even more people that have cultures that are much different from the norms of the western world. hope has been extremely important in my life, but how i’ve used it has not always been correct. before my time here i would have extremely high hopes in my life, this is somewhat related to the high expectations that i have. having hope is great, but having high hopes for things that are unachievable is unhealthy. when i would not achieve what i hoped for i found that all my hope was gone. i’ve learned this in my struggles and at notre dame i have become more faithful in my hope in a theological sense. i go to mass more and pray, as god has helped my hope even when it seems like all that is lost. moreau week 12 contributed to my new awakening of faith as i learned that “the prayers offered in a state of dryness are those which please him best” (hope holy cross and a christian education by father james b king moreau fye week thirteen). allowing god into my life just gives me assurance that there is an overarching power that has a plan for me and cares about me. i will continue building on my faith in the future as i find it to be very fruitful for my whole person. all in all, i have not grown this much in such a short span of time in my life. notre dame has proven to be the perfect place for me to grow mentally and intellectually. i look forward to the person i will become at my journey’s end. for now, i focus on taking it one day at a time, overcoming whatever life throws at me. moreau integration 2 paper victor m. trejo gonzalez victor m. trejo gonzalez professor andrew whittington moreau fys 10101 december 02, 2021 internal hardship with academic struggles my whole life i have been praised for my academic success and hard work. i never once struggled in school and accomplished all my goals including coming to notre dame! however, i had a reality check when college life became more difficult and i began to encounter academic hardship. it became hard for me to adapt and grow from my past ways in which i naturally succeeded in school to now having to really implement myself and study for academic success. having never experienced academic hardship before, it has become hard for me internally to accept that i am doing my best and there is nothing more for me to do than just push forward and grow from this experience. to begin, on our first week back from fall break we discussed encountering internal dissonance. a major topic we talked about in this discussion was the effect of imposter syndrome and how it affects students heavily. we articulated how students tend to be a big target to imposter syndrome because of our common feeling of failure from the pressure of needing academic success. imposter syndrome is very prevalent but due to a lack of exposure it doesn't seem as a grave issue. therefore, “to call it a syndrome is to downplay how universal [imposter syndrome] is” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine) because many encounter imposter syndrome but feel discouraged to talk about their experiences with this issue. for instance, i have experienced extreme imposter syndrome especially now that https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo i am struggling academically to attain my goals. i never believed i was qualified to come attend notre dame. i never believed i deserved my scholarship. and i never believed in my own well deserved success. i kept comparing my accomplishments to other students' success not allowing myself to grow but instead keeping myself grounded by my own “limitations”. it was because of these bottled emotions that i began to have internal struggles accepting my academic hardships. i am trying my best and the switch from high school to college has been hard but i never allowed myself to accept the fact that it is okay to not be okay and having this discussion in moreau really helped me understand that sometimes i just need to take a step back and talk things out. furthermore, in week ten we touched on the topic of encountering brokenness. we learned of the art of kintsugi to learn that facing brokenness is totally fine and a good thing. kintsugi is used as a means of visual imagery to teach us that broken items can become even more beautiful than they were before. therefore, feeling brokenness is a good thing “worth celebrating because it allows [us] to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). this taught me that it is okay to feel out of place and experience hardship because it only makes us stronger. for example, after this class i learned that just because i had a rough patch in starting college it didn't mean it was the end. instead i picked myself up and tried harder and gave myself room for failure because it only makes me wiser. i learned that it will be fine and that i have time to bounce back and try harder. to continue, in week eleven we learned about encountering community. we learned that sometimes we need to confide in others to help us grow. it also never hurts to have people who want you to succeed in your back corner. we learned that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau week eleven). we must not take community https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ for granted because it is a blessing and a gift to be able to have people like you surrounding and backing you. when i started encountering my hardship of academic struggle the most i outsourced for help and some of my closest friends now helped me by giving me courage and allowing me to confide in them for when i'm stressed and hurting. now we are more than just friends and confide in each other for anything. this depicts how community is not something you seek, it is something you gain and earn because the relationships build themselves but there needs to be a connection and i am blessed to have found my people. finally, in our last week in moreau we learned about encountering hope. we learned that hope is wonderful and an amazing tool that helps us get through our day to day lives. for instance, i tend to stick strong to my faith and my hope in god to allow me to grow because “striving for completeness means spending one's life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c. s. c moreau week twelve) meaning that if we live through god then we'll make it to heaven. my faith in god is something that helped me overcome my internal struggle with my encounter with academic hardship because it let me put my faith and trust in god and take some weight off of me because god is helping me get through the hard times that come with life. it's like how jesus carried the cross and gave his life for us to live and survive. it is beauce of moreau that i have grown in my faith in god and have grown in my hope of the world and life overall. moreau taught me that hope is wonderful and should be cherished. as a final point, i have to state that it has been hard to get used to the pace and life in college. however, moreau has helped me grow as a person and as a student giving me insight into my own internal identity, community, and belief in hope and faith. i am very thankful and https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ grateful for the ability to grow through this class and i am proud to say that my internal encounter with my hardship with my struggle with school has gotten lighter and i owe it all to my new moreau community and my professor andrew whittington. moreau integration 1 assignment james demaro professor espeseth moreau 15 october 2021 what makes life worth living while i have been on this earth for seventeen years, only recently have i spent time thinking about what i truly value. while these thoughts may take the form of questions such as what brings me happiness and how can i help others, the real question has always been what do i believe. root belief statements are what define us as individuals. they are what mold us into the humans that we are. during my senior year of high school, i did a lot of thinking about what makes me who i am. i found that life’s values lie in relationships. i found that it’s more important to be yourself than some image that other people want you to be. most importantly, i defined my root beliefs. moreau has helped me to realize these root beliefs in their full potential. i’ve learned where i’ve come from and what brought me to this point as i attend the university of notre dame. “where i’m from,” a short poem about our roots, helped me to see how my values brought me to one of the best catholic, private schools in the country (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). in my own life, the root beliefs that define who i am are that i believe that i am searching for life-giving relationships, that my community should work to help others, and that it is extremely important to value ourselves and others. i believe that i am searching for life giving relationships. in a beautiful presentation by brené brown, she offers up the idea that relationships are what gives life meaning. while on the topic of life-giving relationships, she says, “by the time you’re a social worker for 10 years, you http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html realize that connection is why we’re all here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i’ve found this quote to be especially relevant within my own life. the strong and healthy connections that we share with others are what make us human. without love for others, there would be no happiness or even any other emotions. without relationships with other people, as sad as it may sound, life seems meaningless. during my senior year of high school, i looked to help myself better my relationships with others in order to find happiness. this took the place of finding people that made me happy. i began to discover who my real friends were and who i truly enjoyed spending time with. i began to spend more time with my family, especially with my grandparents and cousins. when i spend time with these people, i make sure to truly engage and connect with them. by connecting ourselves with people that we love, life finds meaning and we find happiness. however, there is always another side to relationships. when we are stuck spending time with people that hurt us, there can be a detrimental effect. “you may think toxic friendships are limited to a high school mean girls scenario, but anyone who’s arrived in adulthood knows finding quality friendships is not easy” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). olivia taylor explains the value of finding meaningful relationships and the difficulty in doing so. when i was a sophomore in high school, i was part of a group of friends who i didn’t really like. eventually, me and my true friends found out they were talking behind our backs. instead of making a dramatic scene, we stopped hanging out with them. once we left the toxic relationship, we were all just so much happier. we didn’t have to spend time putting up with all of their arguments and fusses. this is why it’s important to stay away from toxic relationships. while it may seem that more friends is always a positive, toxic relationships can do much more harm than we think. https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ i believe that my community should work to help others. in a very powerful video father mccormick says that “the greatest journey that you will ever go on is one of self discovery. on this journey success, productivity and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding as the person you best know yourself to be. to do this we need a framework to live our lives” (“the role of faith in our story” by father mccormick moreau fye week three). father mccormick gives us this very valuable advice and tells us that we must love others that are most in need. our world is flawed, hungry, thirsty, and imprisoned. just like having a framework for fixing knots in our shoes, we need a framework to live our lives. in our daily lives, our different faith journeys are all unique. we need to trust and remain hopeful when we bring faith into our lives. by bringing this element of faith into our lives, we can better ourselves in order to help others. with faith on our side, one such way that we can help the world is through education. father moreau calls education “a work of the resurrection,” “a work of life out of death” (“two notre damesyour holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). education leads us away from the darkness of ignorance and sin and brings us to new lives. education is extremely uplifting and can bring communities closer and break down barriers that can separate us. people begin to commit to integrity and values in society. this education can then unite us as we journey on our joint goal that is heaven. notre dame priests are committed to change and to making the world a better place. by spreading the gift of education, we can bring communities together for the better. this is why it’s so imperative to help others. when we do this, we not only better the person being helped, but we better ourselves. i believe that it is extremely important to value ourselves and others. in a ted talk on one-sided stories, chimamanda adichie says “all i had heard about them was how poor they https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 were, so it was impossible to see them as anything but poor. that poverty was my single story of them” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). when being told a story about a poor family, adichie is blinded to the truth about them. growing up, i’ve found that most of our perceptions of the world are based upon our parents' teachings. we might view another culture differently due to this fact. as adichie says, her experiences as a child in nigeria were not much different than other children in the united states. we are all people and sometimes these teachings corrupt our images of other people. even though civil rights have come so far, so many children grow up thinking that particular cultures are inferior to their own or live incredibly different lives. for example, in elementary school, i was always told to eat my food because “people in africa are starving.” this leads to some people having a completely one sided story of africa that it’s a completely poverty stricken nation. it’s important that we see other people for who they truly are. while it’s important to value others, it’s equally important to fully value ourselves. david brooks offers up a scenario where we place our values in the wrong things and are left broken. “we happen to live in a society that favors adam 1 and often neglects adam 2. that turns you into a shrewd animal. you treat life as a game, and you become a cold calculating creature” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). when we place our value in life in things such as relationships, we are left much happier. root beliefs are so important in our lives because they serve as goals and ideals for us. when we discover what we truly believe and work towards it, life becomes a lot easier. by following our root beliefs, life becomes worth living. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim moreau integration paper midterm october 14, 2021 uncovering my power i believe that the power of vulnerability with others is built through honesty and open-mindedness with the self. during my time here at notre dame, i’ve encountered a variety of obstacles: far less communication with my friends and family back home, a frequently busy schedule, and finding times to look after my physical and mental health, to name a few. as a result, self-reflection–while it is a priority for me–often gets put on the back-burner. as the weeks progressed, i found it increasingly difficult to manage my day-to-day activities as they remained; simply put, my lifestyle was unsustainable. recognizing this truth allowed me to begin making change, first by communicating my difficulties. upon discussing my situation with one of my closest friends here at notre dame, i realized that i was not alone in handling the college transition. my friend had experienced the exact same difficulties as i had. opening up to my friends about my struggles–having the courage to be vulnerable–showed me that not only was i not alone, but that being honest with myself and others about difficult circumstances allowed me to cultivate more emotionally intimate, deeper friendships. since this particular experience, i’ve not only learned how to better transition to college life, but i’ve felt an increased sense of belonging. as brene brown described, “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe that they are worthy of love and belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown, fye week 1) the heightened sense of comfort and balance i’ve since established is truly a testament to how actively choosing vulnerability has increased my own self-respect and appreciation. i believe that one’s journey of personal growth begins with seeking to learn more about oneself. as david brooks stated in his tedtalk in regards to combating personal demons, “[...] you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling–that suffering–then a depth of character is constructed.” (david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy? by david brooks, fye week 2). only through confronting our inner struggles can we hope to grow as individuals. through patient self-reflection and with the courage to acknowledge that we as humans are fallible, we can determine which areas of our life we hope to improve upon. i came to recognize this after having a falling out with my best friend during high school. at the time, i had blamed myself for many of the difficulties i had within that relationship. but as months passed after our friendship came to an end, i realized that i had fallen victim to repeated manipulation, deception, and lies–choices my friend made that were simply beyond my control. this was a difficult truth to confront; i had to learn to be gentle and patient with myself going forward, as i realized i couldn’t be responsible for the decisions and actions of others–particularly when such actions bear nothing but malicious intent. i’ve integrated this knowledge into my current friendships here at notre dame by prioritizing trust and honesty in my relationships after recognizing just how dangerous it can be when those elements are 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=emb_imp_woyt https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim missing. by cultivating safe, comfortable spaces on campus, whether it be in dorm lounges or library study rooms, my friends and i have found spaces where we can be fully comfortable with each other and our environment. i believe that support, trust, and mutual respect are essential to establishing life-giving relationships. to me, life-giving relationships are those in which both individuals involved are encouraged by one another to challenge themselves but recognize their own personal boundaries. hearing “you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected” in the one love foundation video was particularly striking; it resonated with me because while i’ve never been told the words, the meaning of them has been expressed to me time and time again in a previous friendship (#thatsnotlove campaign | because i love you whiskey by one love foundation, fye week 4). that toxic relationship has since come to an end, but the mental scars i bear from it still remain. while i had to learn the consequences of a lack of healthy boundaries in a difficult way, the lessons i learned from that particular experience still hold true. the most rewarding relationships i’ve formed over the course of my life have been marked by common factors: open communication, trust, and above all, compassion. cultivating spaces in which i feel comfortable to be my most authentic self has proven vital to my own personal health and wellbeing. in regards to forming life-giving relationships, i’ve become much more aware of the role i want those relationships to play in my life, particularly with carla harris’s message in mind, as she said, “we can never get more time. we should therefore be extremely intentional with our time and spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time.” (notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address by carla harris, fye week 5) taking this message outside the religious context of her speech, this idea is something that i find myself thinking about frequently. i don’t consider the time i spent in a toxic friendship to be time wasted, as i learned just how resilient and strong-willed i can be in the face of adversity. however, i actively choose to spend my energy only on relationships that bring me joy, simply put. recognizing my limited time in this world has allowed me to become far more mindful of my everyday choices. here on campus, i’ve prioritized spending time with my closest friends. even if it’s just studying together at the library or planning a meal at the dining hall, being intentional with my time and spending it with my closest friends here has only made notre dame feel more like home. i believe that faith in my mind, heart, and drive define my place within the world in the absence of any belief in any deity or higher powers. confronting my lack of religion at a catholic university has been a difficult journey. watching my classmates (particularly those who are catholic) flourish on their journey of faith has made me feel rather isolated, particularly as we are constantly surrounded by catholic icons, imagery, and prayer in all forms. however, i’ve followed father pete’s advice to “resist the temptation to compare [myself] against what others profess to know and believe.” (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete, mccormick, fye week 3). as i’ve learned more about catholicism and theology as a whole here at notre dame, i’ve become more comfortable with my agnostic standing. i don’t attribute any of my capabilities to a higher order; and yet despite still feeling isolated, i’ve found comfort knowing that i am a 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois product of triumphs over adversity, past mistakes, and lessons learned. i do appreciate that notre dame offers a comfortable environment for discussions on personal and religious beliefs. i believe i still have plenty of room left to grow in terms of my beliefs surrounding faith, so i want to explore this topic more in the classroom in theology next semester so that i have both an academic and a social context to my understanding of the subject. i believe that i am a mosaic of the stories of my past and present. i think that this belief is transparent within my where i’m from poem, as the vast majority of my writing was rooted in the stories of my past: places i’ve been, people i’ve loved, and moments of joy, regardless of how mundane they may seem. i carry memories of the “midnight drives into the country” and chasing after the “fireflies in the night” with me wherever i go, as moments like these have taught me to value smaller joys in life ("where i'm from" poem by , fye week 6). as my time here is in fact limited, finding contentment in the journey rather than the destination has given me more than sufficient fulfillment. i feel incredibly lucky to have discovered an appreciation for such moments early in my childhood. it makes me think to david brooks’s comment in “how to destroy truth”, in which he describes a “great reservoir of knowledge” as “the knowledge of who we are as a people, how we got here, what long conflicts bind us together, what we find admirable and dishonorable, what kind of world we hope to build together” (how to destroy truth by david brooks, fye week 7). while i feel secure with my self-knowledge and identity, i am still on the journey of finding how my story fits into the world around me. finding my place in the global community is something i hope to learn more about along my college journey. on my path of uncovering my personal powers and abilities, i hope to apply my knowledge to a cause that is greater than myself. whether this be through involvement in local community service or participating in global research initiatives, i intend to utilize notre dame’s many resources to further my personal journey while simultaneously contributing to a larger cause. 3 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zy7h8qjhppt1vupxd38zfocitwgmht6waq2loi3doeg/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare julia mcgibbon integration #2 a new hope in a new home during my first semester at notre dame, i encountered all the ways in which i needed to improve. i encountered my own impatience, laziness, and insecurity. primarily, however, i learned how to create perspective for myself and not be so affected by the day to day inconsistencies of life. i’ve gone through ups and downs, or “peaks and troughs,” and have learned to better embrace this as a simple part of the human experience. ultimately, i have encountered both my flaws and my strengths, but primarily have experienced faith and hope in a new way. i had many expectations going into school, most of which were time-dependent, and i did not recognize the value of patience. i wanted to meet the perfect friends, get into a perfect routine, and perform perfectly in my classes immediately. however, i wasn’t leaving room for the effect that such a new environment would have on me. with anything i have ever experienced, i realize that the first few months are vastly different from my overall experience at that time. i really struggled to adjust to the pace of school at first and was absolutely exhausted, so exhausted that i slept through some classes, something i never did at home. this led to intense disappointment in myself and a questioning of my entire identity: who am i if i’m not performing well in school and in total control of my life? however, like screwtape states in his letters, humans’ “nearest approach to constancy… is undulation” (“the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i have found this to be undeniably true as i am constantly shifting in my understanding of the world around me and my personality. i am not rigid, but constantly changing. thus, my first encounter was really with my “old self” and how to embrace a new, varying version of myself. i needed to be more understanding that i was simply in a new environment with new people and would need time to adjust. i also came to notre dame and expected to receive a certain amount of attention. however, being at notre dame has taught me that external validation can actually lead to greater dependency and insecurity. similar to the experiences of the author of the week 9 article, in the beginning of the year my social life was a game of trial and error in which i was “slowly learning in which groups i felt welcome and included” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). the “arbitrary” expectations i went into college with inevitably backfired on me. i thus encountered my ego and own need for external validation. i learned that none of the small interactions or words that other people say about you truly matter. instead, the most important thing is one’s own confidence in herself and her principles. thus, this year i have encountered my ego but also my conviction, which is a source of “hope” that is “indispensable to every good deed” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). i have re-focused in on my fundamental beliefs to keep me grounded but also know i need to be aware that this conviction can still be corrupted by “pride and greed” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). i have been improving at finding the difference between my beliefs and my pride. finally, i have encountered my new self growing in a deeper way in an environment i finally feel more comfortable in-i have encountered, towards the end of this semester, a new hope. i am optimistic about the next semester as i have had time to find friends here and reset the expectations i had going into school. i now have the knowledge and past experiences to be able to deal with whatever happens here. i also realize socially that there will always be people who i do not like or who do not like me and i know that “as long as i am there, the person i least want to live with will be there as well” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). i have accepted that and now am more concerned with forming quality friendships with the right people. i realized i was more afraid of how i would react to my environment that i was of the environment itself. however, i am no longer so worried about “missing out” on events but rather i have learned to prioritize going to activities that make sense for me. i know that the most meaningful times i spend with people will not be in group settings, but rather in one on one interactions. finally, i have learned through these experiences to try and treat my suffering as a positive thing and as a way to grow in my faith. in other words, “it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift. (8:118)” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau fye week 12). this point about seeing a cross as a “gift” was crucial in grounding myself in a more positive mindset and allowing myself to submit to god and find faith in him. there have been points throughout my life where i’ve turned to a negative and nihilistic mindset instead of looking towards my faith. however, i have learned that it is the least rewarding approach and always leaves me less satisfied. when i have opened to my heart to god, whether it be here at my dorm mass at jfam or even quiet moments at the grotto, i always find a peaceful resolution, even if it is one i do not understand. i’ve encountered god at notre dame, in even the most subtle ways. last night, for instance, i was in bp and walked past their chapel and had to stop. i felt drawn to the smell of incense and the warm glow of the room. i stood there for minutes lost in thought about what really matters and knew, even though there are things about my faith that i do not understand, that i really find that comfort no where else. through my relationship with god and my experiences at notre dame this semester, from which i have learned immensely, i have encountered hope here and am looking forward to my next few years here. expectations and setbacks my first semester at college has been extremely rewarding as it has taught me more life lessons and skills then i ever could have imagined. i have encountered both achievements and failures which have shown me how to become a better person, student, and member of the community. the setbacks and failed expectations that i have experienced this semester have allowed me to gain a better understanding of adulthood and independence. since my father attended notre dame, i always had this glamorous view of the university and what it had to offer. the campus is stunning, the games are entertaining, and the academics are amongst the best across the nation. all of these remain true, however after arriving on campus other ideas about the university have been brought to my attention. as a gateway student it is very difficult to feel welcomed and loved by the notre dame administration considering the housing situation. after hearing the news that we would not receive housing on campus next year, i was very agitated and confused with how little the administration seemed to care. we were given an amazing description of the gateway program and how easy the transition to campus is sophomore year, yet these were all lies. as weeks went by, i began to realize that this was truly a blessing. i will have a much different experience than a typical notre dame student, but in my eyes it could actually be betteri can cook my own meals, have my own bathroom, not have to abide by parietals, and have much more space than a dorm. it has taught me that if you have a preconceived idea of how some experience might go, it most likely will never turn out the way you dreamed it would. so, it is best to have an open and clear mind when entering a new part of your life so that you avoid being disappointed. as julia brown said, “ not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” ( https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/? utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau , why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, by julia brownmoreau fye week 9). i will take this idea with me throughout my entire life as i begin new jobs, meet new people, and travel to new places. another example of a failure that i have experienced is of course, school. i have always been a good student and never really had to put in that much effort to do well in high school. however in college, this method was shown to be extremely ineffective. in my biology class, we have exams every few weeks. when the first one rolled around i was feeling confident as i have learned the material many times throughout my education. i did minimal studying, but while taking the exam i immediately regretted this. my professor made the exam very tricky and you truly had to understand the concepts and material at hand to answer the questions correctly. so, without studying very well i did poorly on the exam as my grade was a 75%. i knew that i could do better so i began to read each chapter in the textbook and rewrite my notes before quizzes and exams. over time i have mastered the studying techniques for the class and have an a in the class! i needed that first failure to wake me up and force me to reevaluate my study techniques so that i could be successful. this idea is portrayed in the quote, “everybody, i hope, walks away with this like greater connection to who they are. that https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau they learn, that the things they’ve experienced the good, the bad, the ugly, all of thatit has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today” ( https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ , women find healing through kintsugi workshop, by kirstenmoreau fye week 10). this lesson was extremely important in making me a better student and i am sure that i will struggle many more times in new and challenging classes but i now know that i have the strength to bounce back. finally, my last example of an expectation that was proved wrong involved politics and religion. being from new york, i was raised in a progressive household and most of my friends and family are liberal and share the same beliefs. in addition, although i was baptized and received my first communion and confirmation, i was not raised in a very strict catholic household. i don’t attend church often, and honestly i struggle with finding a connection to god and believing in everything. over the summer, as it came closer to attending school, i became worried that i would be overwhelmed with conservative christians who would try to push their beliefs onto me. however, i have now realized that this was a very foolish idea. the religious aspect of the university is very strong, however it is only there if you want to be a part of it. and, if you want to steer clear of it, no one will give you a hard time. in regards to the political side, i have made conservative friends who i respect and can have respectful debates with. i have become more respectful of other people’s beliefs as everyone was raised in a different environment. a quote that portrays the idea of respecting all in a community is, “my concept of community must be capacious enough to embrace everything from my relation to strangers i will never meet (e.g., the poor around the world to whom i am https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ accountable), to people with whom i share local resources and must learn to get along (e.g., immediate neighbors), to people i am related to for the purpose of getting a job done (e.g., coworkers and colleagues)” ( http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ , thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i think that this was one of the most important lessons i have learned so far because i will always find people who believe in different ideas than me, but i must learn to respect them to foster a healthy community. my time here has been very enlightening and i feel that i have become more self-aware of myself and my surroundings. i have learned many lessons such as avoiding having high expectations, using failures as a fuel for success, and to be respectful of all opinions. i have learned these lessons through first-hand experiences here that have involved many struggles and setbacks. the most important lesson that i have failed to mention thus far is that everyone is struggling too. through talking to friends, classmates, and even friends from back home, it is obvious that everyone has had their own sets of problems that they had to overcome. as reverend james b. king says, “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus” ( https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189556?module_item_id=106340 , holy cross and christian education, reverand james b. king moreau fye week 12). this idea that everyone has their own burdens and everyone is becoming stronger because http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189556?module_item_id=106340 of this is very comforting and warming. notre dame has given me unique experiences that have taught me influential and valuable life lessons. over the course of this semester, i have determined that my personal mission is to be a beacon to all sorts of other people through building relationships with them and offering support. i reached this conclusion because while reading the school’s mission statement and figuring out what types of values and goals are embodied in mission statements generally, i decided that the primary goal that i seek is helping others because i find it very fulfilling (notre dame mission statement, moreau week 13). i used the idea of being a beacon rather than saying help because i think it embodies the degree to which i want to help others in that i want to stand out as a person who is known for giving help and providing support. i realized that this was specifically the degree to which i wanted to help others when we were asked to think about our careers in moreau. i was trying to discern what sort of job would let me help people in a way that would be truly fulfilling, and this notion of being known and recognized as someone who helps others kept popping up in my head (navigating your career journey, meruelo center, moreau week 4). there were also a number of moments throughout the semester that i feel affirmed that this mission suits me. one of these moments was the discernment conversation we had during week 5. during the conversation, my friend told me that the things i value the most are my friends and their wellbeing, which is absolutely in line with my goal of being a beacon to others (conversation activity, moreau week 5). this idea was again reaffirmed while reading the excerpt of fr. greg boyle’s tattoos on the heart because the idea of giving people a second chance through making connections with them is something else in which i believe. i’ve made many interesting friends at notre dame by getting to know people who felt isolated and shunned, albeit not because they had a criminal past. (tattoos on the heart, fr. greg boyle, moreau week 7). when we read the article about accompaniment during week 9, i felt that the concept of accompaniment really resonated with me as a good way to make connections through supporting others, which is something very fulfilling to me and is one of the primary focuses of my personal mission (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together,” professor steve reifenberg, moreau week 9). during this semester, i also made some discoveries about what will be required of me to become a beacon for others. during week 12, the focus on courage helped me to realize that courage comes in many ways. realizing that courage can come in the form of being willing to be vulnerable and share experiences, like in dean cole’s letter, helped me to open my eyes and recognize the times where i acted with courage in my own life, which most commonly were the times where my courage made a situation easier for someone else (dean g. marcus cole, “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something,” moreau week 12). another time i discovered something that was important for me to carry out my mission was during our discussion about humanity during week 10. accepting the humanity of others hasn’t been something particularly difficult for me in the past but reading it on paper and conscientiously telling myself that everyone is human and struggles helped me to come to a realization. nobody is better than anyone else and that i shouldn’t be afraid to reach out to someone because i saw them as being more accomplished, talented, or better in any other way. this has helped me a lot in striving to become a beacon for others (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame,” moreau week 10). while looking to apply this idea of common humanity in my own life, i found that it led me to learn a lot of new things through the process of building connections with those whom i normally might not have associated with. i talked to a friend of a friend who is an athlete and was curious to learn about what that lifestyle was like, and it was very eye opening for me to learn the struggles that athletes face in college. i never really considered those types of struggles before it before since i tended not to have close friendships with athletes in the past and therefore had built a sort of echo chamber (how to avoid an echo chamber, dr. paul blaschko, moreau week 11). throughout the semester, there were also many points where i was able to home in on how i want to carry out my mission. one of the biggest of these points came after self-reflection because after thinking about why it sometimes felt better to help some people than others, i came to the realization that it felt better to help people i had long term connections with as opposed to helping someone random in a one-time situation (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico iyer, moreau week 1). i had struggled with this question for a while, and i couldn’t figure out what the difference was between the situations where i felt the best versus those where i didn’t feel as great. once i started asking why i sometimes felt better helping than others rather than what was keeping me from feeling as good, i made the realization that in the situations where i felt better, i had stronger connections to the people i was helping and they showed gratitude for my help, and it also helped to make our friendships stronger. this feedback in the form of both tangibly deeper connections and recognition is what gives me fulfilment from helping others (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, moreau week 6). another point where i learned something valuable about how i wanted to carry about my mission was when we were asked to read about memento mori in week 3. memento mori was a concept i used to think about a lot, but i hadn’t thought about it much since coming to notre dame. revisiting the topic reminded me that not only should i live life to the fullest, but i should also try to help others to the fullest of my capabilities (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die, ruth graham, moreau week 3). this reminder was only strengthened by watching the movie hesburgh the week before. learning about the life of someone with so many accomplishments helped me to inspire myself to put in the work every day to try to fulfill my mission. coming out of this semester, i hope that i can work hard every day for the next three years as well as for the rest of my life to try to help others as much as possible and build connections through the abundant opportunities that are available on the notre dame campus and beyond. i hope that by building these connections with many types of people i can gain wisdom that i can then use to help others and work towards becoming a beacon that others can rely on for help when they don’t know where to turn. i am confident that striving to fulfill this mission statement will inspire me to make the most out of every day during my time here and form strong relationships that will last a lifetime. integration one tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 how i came to be the independence of college life brings about many new experiences and changes that i have not yet encountered before in my life. it is also a time to reflect on my core values and what i truly believe in. my core values are what will carry and guide me throughout the next four years and the rest of my life, so it is important to ensure that i have a strong grasp of my core beliefs. each week’s focus question for the moreau first year experience course has allowed me to reflect upon myself, my beliefs, and my experiences. i believe that i am searching for a group of friends that i can truly rely on and be vulnerable with. in high school, i had many friends but none were close friends to whom i could truly express myself and my feelings. a lot of the friends that i had in high school partied, and i do not consider myself a party person, so i have always believed that i missed out on connections because i did not attend parties. i shifted my mindset to “i will act true to who i am, and if friends come along—good.” this mindset was meant to help me become less self-conscious because i am a very self-conscious and self-aware person. dr. brown’s statement saying, “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) represents a notion that i have tried to come to fully believe myself in terms of finding friends. i think that i have achieved her statement to some extent. i was able to find three other girls whom i am very close to, and we are all able to share our experiences very openly. earlier this week on my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be tran 2 birthday, my three friends made a cake and surprised me with it. at that moment, i realized that i had found three caring friends who would go out of their way to help me if i ever needed it. ever since i was little, my parents have taught me not to give in to peer pressure. i believe that this is an essential part of being able to ground yourself in your own values and beliefs. not giving in to peer or societal pressure allows me to find my own values by myself. this forces me to evaluate what i truly believe in based on my own experiences. the idea of standing my ground has been built up and tested through in class discussions during some of my high school theology classes. sometimes i was one of few who believed or interpreted something one way, and i felt comfortable enough to be in that minority. this belief has also helped me to stand on my own and has contributed to my being able to be comfortable with myself and be independent. i am comfortable enough with myself to be able to do things on my own without someone else with me, which i believe is something very valuable to know how to do in life. david brooks said in his tedtalk, “we live in perpetual self confrontation between the external success and internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). by being able to stand on my own, i can establish what i want from life. i can apply my own values to evaluate how i want to make my impact on society. i wish to be like “adam 2” by fighting my weaknesses. academic-wise, i recently received a bad grade on my economics exam. i am in the process of “fighting” this weakness and going to office hours, so i can grasp the concepts of economics and do better in the class. i believe that i view life through a lens of faith, hope, and love. i am a big believer in everything happening for a reason. a quote from professor fagerberg saying, “everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg -moreau fye week three) sums this idea up. looking at life as being designed by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau tran 3 god helps me to recognize that there is a larger plan for me. i came to believe this through my mom’s cancer diagnosis. i viewed my mom’s cancer as god’s way of bringing my family closer to him and to each other. remembering that everything is of god’s creation helps me to find positives in negative situations. challenges and obstacles in my life must be present because they are meant to teach me something that i would not have been able to learn by easily going through life. i believe that i am a good listener. in order for them to be fruitful, conversations must have meaning in them. to have meaning, conversations must also be a back and forth interaction in which one person is the listener and the other is the speaker. when i am in a conversation with someone, i try to actively listen so i can understand and comprehend what the person has just said. by actively listening, i can form a better connection with that person. if i were not actively listening, i may miss out on a piece of information that would have connected me and the other person more. a sentence that sticks out to me from one of the articles is “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i believe that forming good relationships stems from good conversations and communication as this is what i engage in with my three closest friends. i often prefer to be the listener because i can learn so much about a person from just listening to them. i consider this to be something very beneficial for me in the future. i believe that failures and challenges are all meant to teach me something valuable. failures and challenges cause me to think differently and more creatively. i believe this because if i improve my way of thinking now, i will not make the same mistake again, and i will benefit from it in the future. i view challenges as a means of pushing me forward and building my https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ tran 4 determination and tenacity. father kevin grove said in his presentation, “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). this belief came about from all my academic challenges. in each challenge, i had to come up with a different plan of action in order to do better. throughout the years, i have corrected my way of viewing failures, and i now see them as a good thing when i can learn something from those failures. a profound quote from the “where i’m from” website states, “ i want to know when you get to be from a place” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). all people come from places and experiences that have had a deep impact on their lives. i believe that i am the result of my parents, faith, and interactions with other people. my parents have helped me form my core values and guided me in the right direction. these teachings have gotten me through high school and almost three months of college. i believe that my strong belief in my core values has helped me make the right decisions, so i will not regret anything in the future. my parents have always pushed me to do and be my best, and sometimes when i have little motivation, i remind myself of what i am trying to accomplish. i view my faith as being the biggest contributor to me grounding myself. it serves as a reminder of the more important things in life and gives me hope to keep pushing forward during hard times. i also believe interactions are a big factor in who i am today. i always try to find pieces of wisdom to take away from my interactions with people. everyone has experienced and gone through life differently, so by interacting with many people, i am expanding my knowledge and horizons. i believe that the community and society at large need to lessen the implicit bias that all people have. chimamanda adichie said in her ted talk, “a single story creates stereotypes” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7). when we https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story tran 5 have implicit bias, we are only seeing one side of the story. as we have all seen with george floyd and the blm movement, there is still a lot of work to be done within our society about racial bias. as individuals, we must fight the misconceptions that we form in our minds. we have to question if what we hear is true and what sources the truth comes from. living while only knowing one side of the story makes us ignorant people. in order for us to be agents of change, we must change our mindsets to always know two sides to a story. each week of moreau has allowed me to reflect upon my own decisions and priorities. my search for belonging and life-giving relationships has, so far, given me three very close friends whom i can trust and rely on when i need them. my identification of narratives, influences, and perspectives has led me to understand my background, how to make the best out of failures, and correct any misconceptions i may have. searching for self-knowledge and a framework provoked me to evaluate what i want to accomplish in life and how faith plays a role throughout the way. together, these weeks have made me reflect and remember who i am, what i believe in, and what i want to do to make me a stronger and more grounded college student. tran 6 works cited adichie, chimamanda ngozi. “the danger of a single story.” ted, www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story. brené, brown. “the power of vulnerability.” youtube, uploaded by tedx talks, 6 oct. 2010, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0. brooks, david. “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” youtube, uploaded by ted, 14 april 2014, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim. fagerberg, david. “faith brings light to a dark world.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fa ll_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. accessed 13 october 2021. grove, kevin. “two notre dames: your holy cross education.” university of notre dame sign in,notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/ viewer.aspx?id=85 9bc1a8-0 d0f-4eb4-a 1c1-d0a45c429187. lyon, george ella. “where i'm from .” where i'm from, a poem by george ella lyon, writer and teacher, www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html. accessed 14 october 2021. taylor, olivia t. “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship.” grotto network, 17 sept. 2021, grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/. accessed 13 october 2021. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html annette’s mission my mission is to always work towards a fulfilling life, one that not only serves myself but others i will prioritize my mental and physical health before all else, for health is the foundation i must build upon i will seek to listen about the experiences of others as listening is the key to empathy i will be a good daughter, supporting and spending time with my parents as they grow older i will be a good sister, offering advice to estelle when she needs guidance i will be a good friend, one who chooses laughter and vulnerability over superficial connections i want to live a life of gratitude, one where i am forever thankful for all the beautiful people and experiences i have been blessed with i want to become flexible, allowing emotions to come as they come, realizing that i will be fine i want to be a light of positivity for others, spreading joy and receiving joy in return my mission is to fight for my freedom and the freedom of others i will use my education and profession to advocate for those who have had their voices silenced my mission is to take life one day at a time, to realize that i need to be mindful about each moment, to spend time with my loved ones wisely… how do i pursue a life well-lived? one of the first things that i write about in my mission statement is the importance of prioritizing my mental health before all else. today, in the world of constant notifications, social media, and technology overall, it has become increasingly difficult to take time to simply be in the moment and relax. but in order to take care of my mental health, this is exactly what i should be doing. during these next three years, i will work on realizing that i do not need to respond to every bombarding phone notification. i have the right to take time to myself where i can focus on practicing meditation and thoughts of gratitude. as pico iyer said, “it’s precisely those who are busiest, who most need to give themselves a break.” it is important i work on these healthy habits as they will only improve the way i live my life. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) the second to last section of my mission statement describes how i long to fight for my freedom and the freedom of others, to use my education and profession to advocate for those who have had their voices silenced. needless to say, there is a lot of political and moral chaos during this critical time in history. unfortunately, as i will inevitably experience and witness racist, sexist, and homophobic interactions in the future, i hope that i do not back down ut instead speak up for those who need my support and allyship. one quote that was spoken about notre dame’s father hesburgh stated that “he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” my mission statement reflects this very sentiment of fighting for the right side of history, a sentiment that i shall always look back on for the rest of my life. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) another core belief in my mission statement emphasizes how i want to become flexible, allowing emotions to come as they come, realizing that i will be fine. although this is a hard mindset to practice, it’s crucial that i realize that life isn’t always so happy. there will be hard moments, times when i feel that the darkness is forever. but i should learn to understand that there is always light at the end of the tunnel. i hope that my mission statement can remind me to frame hard things in a way that ultimately serves me. i want to work even harder to start finding the humor in everything, even the most stressful situations because you’ll realize that in the big picture, they aren’t so life-threatening after all. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) the first sentence of my mission states that i hope to always work towards a fulfilling life, one that not only serves myself but others. this is a very important goalof mine that i must always remember when thinking about the career that i want to pursue. sure, it would be great for me to choose a job that harnesses my talents, but it would be even greater for me to find a job that harnesses my talents for the good of the world. as i grow older, i must actively think about the way my career is affecting both me and the society around me. am i working only for my own gains, or is my work making a positive impact on other people? with this self-knowledge and awareness, i will be able to succeed in whatever field i choose to be a part of. (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) recently, as i’ve started to live independently away from my family, i’ve grown to really understand how much they mean to me. in my mission, i write “i will be a good daughter, supporting and spending time with my parents as they grow older.” i hope to work on feeling more comfortable about sitting down and talking to mom and dad, not just about how school is going, but about the kind of person i am and the kind of person i want to be. these conversations may seem like they would be awkward, but i know in my heart that they will be greatly rewarding. my parents know a lot about me and can help guide me to the goals i want to achieve. allowing them into my life will help me realize that they understand the things i am going through a lot more than i would think. furthermore, it can help us build a stronger relationship of trust with one another, one that i will value increasingly as we all become older. (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five) while i mention gratitude and mindfulness multiple times in my mission statement, it is crucial that in my gratitude and mindfulness i am actively careful with the way that i introspect. self-reflecting is important, but i must be aware of how i am reflecting because doing so in the wrong way can leave me feeling trapped in victimhood. one quote i heard from a ted talk that resonated with me said this: “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” to avoid this, i will remind myself to ask “what” not “why” questions. i feel that i’ve realized good introspection isn't as easy as i thought this year. and in the years to come, i know that it is not just enough to be alone with your thoughts but to be proactive with them to actively work on yourself and redirect to a positive direction. (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) going back to the first sentence in my statement, i hope to further understand that being a good person isn’t as simple as being kind and donating to charities when can. the most meaningful service often comes with personal sacrifices. mother teresa once that "one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense." as i graduate college and expand my bubble of privilege, i must work to use my privilege to help others, not to simply benefit myself. i can not do what is just easy or convenient. this will be difficult and will often mean that i’ll have less time or money to spend on myself, but only when we love at our own expense is it, true love. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) throughout my mission, i talk about the importance of listening to others and participating in service. while i write about how i want to exemplify these qualities, there are many moments in my life when i choose to be negative instead, criticizing the lack of effort or change. but i realize now that “to not be optimistic is just about the most privileged thing you can be.” being wholly pessimistic is basically deciding that there’s no hope for a whole group of people who can’t afford to think that way. in the future, it is necessary that i balance being able to recognize what needs to be criticized but not being so quick to give up on such an issue entirely. i must not forget the main goal in the first place, which is to help the community around me. so while it is important i am honest about where my action is lacking, i must be sure that this reflection is followed by actual corrective work that contributes to helping others. this is the only way we can work to live a life well-lived. (“teaching accompaniment a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) at the beginning of my statement, i mention that “i will seek to listen about the experiences of others as listening is the key to empathy.” there are many experiences that i will never truly understand because of the identity that i hold. still, this does not mean that i should not actively work to hear and listen to these perspectives in order to grow my empathy and gain a larger awareness of the world. though i do not identify with the lgbtq+ community, i hope to continue to be an ally to the community. outdated notions of religion and homophobia have no place in my future of a life well-lived. instead, i will work to champion inclusivity and love among all different types of people. (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten) as my mission states multiple times, i long to use my voice and place of standing to advocate for others who have had their voices silenced. one way that i can do this now that i am older is by actively participating in politics. for many americans, politics has become more of a hobby than anything else. i myself have also been guilty of making it a hobby at times, especially when i was younger and felt that i didn't have the ability or means to make an actual difference. now, however, i am of age to vote and can have much more of an impact inmy academic and professional life. i must use these privileges to advocate for what i believe in. only when i am using my power to make a change in what i believe in will my life be fulfilling. (“passion isn't enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven) combining the multiple themes i’ve mentioned in my mission statement, i want to emphasize again the importance of listening and being empathetic to others in order to enact genuine change. in the next few years at college, i hope to adopt this mindset and implement the specific steps i can take to live a life well-lived. it is not enough to just have a vague idea of what kind of person i want to be. someone like dean g. marcus cole is an inspiration to me as he has worked on specific programs at the university of notre dame, such as restoring the master of laws in human rights, funding fellowships for the juris doctor program, and establishing a new exoneration law clinic to make a difference in what he believes in. i don’t want to be someone that is all talk only saying that i’ll listen to others and make a difference. instead, i will work to be a person of action. (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g marcus cole moreau week twelve) moreau integration two 11/29/21 nhat nguyen moreau integration ii compassion, challenge, and community: my first semester at nd let me start with a quick confession: when i first arrived at notre dame, i thought i had made a huge mistake. as much as i wish i could sugarcoat my welcome weekend experience and the days that ensued, i was met with the harsh reality of going to a new school in a different state with completely new classmates, professors, and friends. having attended the same school for the past twelve years, i had only ever experienced a similar environment on the first day of my new school in first grade, where it arguably was much easier to bond with other students -friends were made at recess and at pe as opposed to at domerfest or in a lecture hall. i grew up surrounded by the same people from 1st-12th grade, comforted by their familiarity and sustained by the advantages of having a secure set of friends and classmates. now, at the end of my first semester at nd, i look back on the past three-and-a-half months with a sense of accomplishment and awe. interestingly, the order of the week 9-12 moreau modules is pretty consistent with the emotions and experiences i dealt with as a first year student at notre dame. after a difficult transition period and feelings of isolation and loneliness, i found my community a month or two into school, and now have a huge amount of hope and excitement for the future. i’ll be reflecting on this throughout my second moreau integration paper while including the resources we watched, read, and discussed during the second half of the semester. 1. encountering dissonance as much as i am embarrassed to admit it, i did have to google search what dissonance meant as i was beginning the week 9 module in october. according to definitions, dissonance is a disconnect -a contradiction or change in thought, belief, or opinion. i first experienced a sense of dissonance during welcome weekend, when i struggled with prioritizing both academic expectations that i had prematurely set for myself and my college experience, and expectations from my family, past teachers, peers, and classmates. i put a lot of pressure on myself to dive into a plethora of new activities while simultaneously performing well in classes, without taking a step back and assessing the new chapter i was about to immerse myself into. when i learned to acclimate to this environment as my new classmates did, i reorganized my priorities and began to put my mental health, happiness, and growth first instead of focusing completely on straight as or grinding out work. during week 9 of the moreau course, we read an article written for the grotto by julia hogan which speaks of the importance of letting go of expectations, either from ourselves or others. for that specific week, i chose a quote that really resonated with the thought pattern i had experienced earlier in the semester, in which hogan writes, “instead of asking, “what should i do?” or “what would my friend/parent/significant other expect me to do?”, ask yourself, “what do i want to do?” and “what do i think is best?” trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (hogan). this quote highlights the philosophy i decided to adopt for the beginning of my college experience -trusting myself, and picking things to focus on that i feel truly passionate about. additionally, this idea relates to one https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-find-your-calling/ of the four guiding questions for the second integration outline: what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? my answer to this would be that i’ve learned the importance of self care, self confidence, happiness, and being able to handle tough situations with grace and perseverance. i now listen to myself and understand my strengths, weaknesses, and limits. i’ve especially enjoyed the classes related to my major, in which i am enjoying learning about the content while simultaneously working hard to retain information. focusing solely on grades and performance, and bringing myself down over small counts of failure have truly decreased since i’ve been at notre dame. 2. encountering brokenness the friday night after move-in day this past august, i remember lying on my semi-comfortable lofted bed, airpods stuffed into my ears, feeling out of place, overwhelmed, and alone despite being surrounded by girls in my hall. after hours of attempting to put myself out there and start conversations with different people, my introverted self was exhausted. everyone i had met so far had been kind and friendly to me, but i longed for a quick and close connection with a group i could feel comfortable opening up to. my brother had gushed about his incredibly positive welcome weekend experience two years prior, so i had come into the weekend ready to experience similar emotions with equally welcoming and friendly people as the duncan boys jake had bonded with so closely. months after the first few weeks of school, i brought up this reality to my small group during a moreau class, and learned of the similar experiences dealt with by many of my peers in the group. it’s inevitable that many freshmen struggle with isolation and a feeling of homesickness, but i overestimated the extent to which i felt alone in these emotions. i especially began to reflect on this truth after hearing the experience of peers who felt they didn’t fit in with the ‘notre dame stereotype’. in week 10, we responded to the question, what are the central challenges of my community and how do i respond? i chose a quote from father jenkins’ commencement address to wesley theological seminary, in which he says, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (jenkins). this address is a vital call to action for our community -especially in today’s turbulent society, hatred continues to exist all across the globe, even in a place as tight-knit as notre dame. in times of brokenness, we need to be as supportive, caring, and compassionate as possible. checking up on friends during times of turmoil is so incredibly important -sometimes those who bring the most joy and laughter to others are the ones who need it the most. one of the questions posed in the moreau outline asks what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? for me, it’s clear that we all undergo struggles and issues, but there is such great power in community and friendship. after hearing about the emotions experienced by other freshmen, i immediately felt less alone and validated by the issues i had faced early on in the year. 3. encountering community in early october, i was invited to sit with two girls from my hall section in our upcoming psych class the following morning. i hadn’t really talked to them before, and felt slightly intimidated knowing they had already grown close, but eager to make friends, i happily accepted. two months later, those girls have become two of my best friends in a larger group of jfam girls. being a part of a close community has been a really positive experience for me -i’ve been able to get to know people from different cultures, communities, and hometowns who each bring their own passions and experiences to the table. being able to contribute to such a community has improved my confidence and significantly improved the overall quality of my college experience after the period of isolation i mentioned above. in general, i feel a surge of pride when i tell anyone that i’m a notre dame student. the nd community as a whole has garnered a national sense of respect from alumni and people alike, and, after only a few short days at nd, i truly began to understand why. as soon as you step onto campus, you really do feel an overwhelming sense of pride and belonging. at my first nd football game in september, i couldn’t believe the spirit and sense of community throughout the day -a trend that continued to be true through later games, class, or even just walking around campus. in week 11, we talked about this sense of community, and discussed the importance of strengthening these bonds despite conflict. inspired by a quote from parker j. palmer on the thirteen ways of looking at community, i reflected on a specific line that resonated with me: “in my life the deepest forms of contemplation have been failure, suffering, and loss. when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. the self-sufficiency i feel in success is a mirage. i need community—and, if i open my heart, i have it” (palmer). here, palmer emphasizes how crucial it is to surround yourself with a support system through both periods of great success and great challenge. it’s easy to close yourself up in times of need, but when we open up and let others in, community will make us stronger. i think in some ways this relates to the third question provided in the moreau outline: what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? i now understand that it’s one thing to have a group of friends, but it’s another to feel utterly supported and uplifted by a community. friendship in high school was arguably black-and-white -on paper, friends were a group of people i enjoyed hanging out with. now, after my first semester in this new college environment, i truly understand the impact of friends who make an effort to care about you and your wellbeing. i am grateful to be apart of a community like the irish -as cliché as it sounds, my life has been changed for the better since the beginning of my freshman year 4. encountering hope at the end of the first semester of my freshman year, i am ridiculously hopeful for my future. i’ve seen the power of this community, and i’ve witnessed how transformative learning can be. i’ve loved every minute of my first psychology class, and now feel more confident in my chosen career field. i’ve found a great group of friends, and i’ve finally begun the journey to find my place at this university. of course, there’s a sense of uncertainty looming over my head -i don’t know how the next three-and-a-half years will pan out -but i’ve gathered a sense of determination and motivation to find my passions and share them with those around me. one thing i am hoping to do more is actively step out of my comfort zone. during our last moreau module in week 12, we were asked the question, how do i live and grow in hope? i felt drawn to the hope section of the holy cross and christian education reading from the campus ministry, which states, “the educational process itself requires a particular type of dying to self. whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place. the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (campus ministry). echoing this quote, learning requires a willingness to put aside past values and beliefs with the goal of expanding one's knowledge and dedicating oneself to complete immersion in their chosen field. hope, in a way, requires something similar. when we are hopeful, we put aside any past failures or struggles and look to the future with a shining sense of purpose and responsibility. hope fuels motivation for me -i work to make my future self proud and know that any challenges i face are bumps in the road towards a life well spent. this sums up the final question posed in the integration guidelines: what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? the main one i’ve constantly asked myself: what do i want to get out of the next four years, and how can i best prepare for my future? i’ve encountered my fair share of highs and lows, but all in all, i know i’ve made the right choice in coming to notre dame. i’ve grown more than i could have ever imagined in these past fourteen weeks. i know i’ll have my fair share of upcoming successes and challenges -and this is inevitable for every college student. but with my community beside me and my determination to experience a positive future, i know i’ll be able to persevere through all the experiences that come my way. after all, it’s only freshman year, right? works cited (continued onto next page) (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109425 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109434 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109288 (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) ("hope holy cross and christian education” pages 14 16 by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve) * https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109458 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109340 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109386 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109468 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109386 ehioze aidaghese professor ryan retartha moreau first year experience april, 26, 2022 capstone integration in evaluating my pursuit to find a life well lived i ran into expected dead ends, filled with questions of self doubt and assurance. “why don’t i have it all found out?” “why haven;t i found my niche yet?” “am i going to be comfortable with my career & life post graduation?” these questions all are towards healthy character discernment. they stem from the mouth of a person who’s concerned about their future and wants the best for themselves. qualities that you can only amass through the programs of deep self reflection, critical thinking, and long term planning that the moreau first year experience curriculum refines and revitalizes for all nd students. the first part of taking advantage of these resources is first understanding the advice and what's being spoken to you. from what point of view are these notions of thought? do they fall in line with the beliefs i currently hold? are they realistically achievable? in the midst of asking yourself all those questions, at least in my personal groundings i’ve found myself becoming trapped in a maze of self comparison and competition. these things arise although from the outside looking in i’m at a promising point with no flaws in mind. little did i know that that was the first blunder, stopping me from getting to where i need to be. there are objects of aid that are overlooked when first embarking on the journey of planning your life. in the words of pico lyer “the amount of data humanity will collect while youre reading the art of stillness is five times greater than the amount that exists in the entire library of congress.” these thoughts are further highlighted by “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes– which means we’re never caught up with our lives.” (“why we need to slow down our lives'' by pico iyer moreau fye week one) you see there’s no rush to compete or compare your progress with your fellow peer, as they have their own plights and distractions in the way of getting them to where they want to be. the teaching from this week opened my eyes to this reality, once again reminding me that no one is perfect. the first part is the realization that you’re not in competition with anyone but yourself. the “me vs me” construct is very real. one column of inspiration that fosters my belief of what makes a life well loved, is the work of ms. tia paulette at the notre dame law school. ms. paulette remained resilient in achieving her goals of exonerating innocent individuals from the justice system. she garnered her idea within the walls of notre dame and stood by it. in the nd alumni association page there was the quote “ by reviving the school’s dormant club – at the time affiliated with the separate innocence project – as a second year student in 2016, paulette laid the foundation for notre dame’s exoneration justice clinic, which provides law students real-world experience representing wrongfully convicted clients.” (“domer dozen '' by nd alumni association moreau fye week two) not only did ms. paulette engineered a way of achieving her goal, but she lifted her fellow mates to attain the same values and results she invested her time in. it's this inclusion, this use of teamwork as opposed to being a competitor. once i too realized that my fellow mates are indeed not ideals of where i could be, but ones that i should arrange a team with and uplift as a unit, the question of what would give me satisfaction in the midst of it arose. fr. michale himes provided a look on how to solve these problems that one may encounter through his “three key questions.” the three questions arranged a belief that you hold for yourself and hone in on what truly matters and drives you toward it. the first question is: what gives you joy? followed by what is the source of your joy? the second question is: is this vocation/ this role/ this profession. this way of life that you are considering something you are good at? then the last question being does anybody need you to do it? (“three key questions'' by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) these questions did a wonderful job of weeding out beliefs that i held previously for the wrong reasons. although they may have had beneficial outcomes for others and me, the roots that they are founded upon aren’t quite truthful enough for me to successfully pursue them. once i attained a belief that was “foolproof” which was the creation of a business, startup or some conglomerate in order to provide resources, education, and needs funding in inner city areas resembling that of what i call home. on the meruelo family center for career development page there's a venn diagram illustrating the necessary steps one must take when looking at the trajectory in which they want to take their life. they describe it as “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one step process.” (“navigating your career journey '' by meruelo family center moreau fye week four) this was helpful for me due to the fact that although i may have thought i had it all figured out, there are areas in which i too needed more research. instead of just posing the notion that i want to go out and help people. why not research the areas in which they need help the most and where their strengths are to find a midsection between the two? this would allow me to construct my ideas and ultimately help in a more beneficial way than once before. the topic of career endeavors and solid beliefs segway into weeks five and six. week five for moreau we had to complete a conversation activity with a loved one or parent in an effort to review the results of our said career path. the prompt said “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor. and while you are the author of your story, it is often helpful to involve those you trust.”( discernment conversation activity” by moreau moreau fye week five) through this assignment and the help of my mother whom i consulted, i was able to see the flaws of the plan that i had put together. i was able to find areas that need more thought and how i could fix them to better suit me. week six then provided the tools on how to be more introspective. before this i had no knowledge of the right and wrong way to look within and better myself. in this weeks text (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) said “we can spend endless amounts of time in self reflection but emerge with no more self insight than when we started.” this is true due to the fact that i can sit down and ponder on my tactics and strategy of how i’ll get to where i want to be, but without true action or effort it's a waste. a thought is simply a thought until we act upon it, it's this understanding that clarified the notion of emerging with the same amount of insight even after reflecting. this type of introspective, and developmental practice geared towards bettering your character starts mold for the future. these concepts are described in the words of his holiness pope francis : “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others.” ('' why the only future worth building includes everyone” his holiness moreau fye week seven) the pope is right in saying that the future is made up of the interactions of the people in the present. through every moment, every decision, every transaction we are shaping the lives of ourselves as well as others. upon this vine of self discovery you may try to define what a life well lived is. how would i want to spend my life's work ? what would i want my legacy to be? in the write your own eulogy assignment for week 8 in the (“integration three '' by moreau fye week 8) i discovered attributes within myself that i would want to pronounce, therefore defining me. it was at first peculiar looking into myself as if i had already gone out and accomplished everything i had in mind before i “kick the bucket.” it made me increasingly grateful for the time i currently have and have already spent. whether or not i spend my time constructively was a paramount principle of mine. one may see that as time goes on they must liberate and pile on responsibilities. thinking that the more they add to their plate makes them look more capable as an adult was a foolish philosophy. i garnered inspiration from the story of prof steve reifen berg in “teaching accompaniment” moreau fye week 9) that in his journey to chile in which he was supposed to be taking care of the impoverished and orphaned children. see he went there with the thought in mind that he was their sole helper and that all there was, was his advocacy towards thim. thai thinking although innocent was wrong. when prof. reifenberg fell ill. it was the same children that he was there and were supposed to be looking after that cared for him. isn’t it such a lovely lesson to see how it's a humane instinct to acknowledge suffering. through this we throw away prejudices, and alert ourselves of our own innate biases. the ability to empathize with a person and understand their plights is a vital step in the creation of a good community. over the past year in the dormant systems i have been subject to the wonderful care and inclusivity of my peers and hall staff community. the text (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame '' by university of notre dame moreau fye week 10) homes in the key pillars to making the christain social community on campus the marvel that it is. “ one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion.” this is very true as here no one is made to feel as if they don’t belong. it is a welcoming community representing multiple facets throughout the world, making for a 1 of 1 experience that i’m honored to take part in day in and day out. education on stereotypes and other hindrances of a healthy environment stops the joining of echo chambers and other one dimensional world views. in a dr. blascko video he explained that “echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles partly because of their ability to lock us into certain worldview” ( “how to avoid an echo chamber'' by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) this is helpful due to the fact that some people may grow up with one sided beliefs that distort the reality of political and religious subjects. one of these constructs is racism. dean g. marcus cole said in his (“i am george floyd, except, i can breathe. and i can do something”moreau fye week twelve ) said “but these were not the only scars that those men left. if it were not for our neighbors, i often wonder whether my little sister, baby brother and i would have survived that night.i know that those men will never have to answer for what they did to us. at least not in this life.” this prompted me to think. a man knowing that he witnessed his father attacked because of the color of his skin. then highlighting the failure of the justice system, alluding through “not in this lifetime” that it's still prevalent today. as an african american in this country as well i too must be alert and distance myself from metacognitive suppositions that’ll lead me astray. in conclusion my mission while here has changed in a decent amount of areas in line with that of the university. “the university insists upon academic freedom that makes open discussion and inquiry possible.”( nd mission statement” by university of notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). this ensured me that i was at an intellectual and complete institution that would foster my growth from the adolescent i am now, into a beneficial member of the future. integration 1 moreau fye integration 1 october 15, 2021 my core beliefs: experiences with values, interpersonal relationships and community my core beliefs are a dynamic and ever-evolving platform on which my morals and self understanding are built on. these values apply to different aspects of my life and shape my experiences in the world and at notre dame. specifically, i have root beliefs that apply to myself and my relationships in my community. these all work in tandem while existing separately. my relationship to myself is important because my beliefs influence my decision making and relationship with faith. my root beliefs for interpersonal connections influence the people i associate with and the bonds i create with them. my root beliefs for my community are shaped by the identity groups i’m a part of and influence the chosen communities i’ve joined. the first aspect of my root beliefs are ones for myself. these are defined as follows; i believe that i am searching for experiences and the resources to make them happen. i believe that i grow by turning inward and working on myself while also doing my part in the outside world. finally, i believe that i pursue the truth by growing my knowledge and breadth of experience. my first value is centered on balancing academic and social experiences, while also working towards a career that will support those endeavors. from the ted talk “should you live for your resume or your eulogy”, i see these two adams in myself in terms of how i want to approach school. my adam 1 wants to only focus on grades and excelling at school. in contrast, my adam 2 wants to work in myself internally and make deep connections with my peers (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). my core beliefs see value in both and want both to exist in my life for a long time. in this transition to college, this core belief has been challenged consistently. there are so many events, clubs and social gatherings happening constantly. however, i also have what seems like an endless list of assignments to complete. i often feel like i’m choosing academics over social connections or vice versa, not letting them coexist. this is when my second value for turning inward and examining myself is necessary. i often struggle with saying no, both when it comes to commitments to clubs and academic events, and to social gatherings. faith is extremely important when it comes to grounding myself and making hard decisions, like saying no. in the week 3 lesson, fr. pete says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is the one of self discovery.” this is a very powerful quote that ties into the importance of faith. my journal is this safe space where i unpack everything in my head and can be free to express my spirituality and values. (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). my final belief has developed over time as i’ve been exposed to learning in school and learning from my community. week 7 focused on learning both from stories and facts. facts are most often found in academic settings, and i continue to learn at notre dame. stories are usually found in personal experience, both from my life and others. i've seen the profound importance of creating space for personal stories in my gender equity for teens club in highschool. this community was meant for everyone where we educated each other on important issues of race, gender, sexuality and other relevant topics in politics, media and society. the topics discussed weren’t ones that i’d seen in my traditional classroom and were just as important as any math or english class. the stories i heard have forever changed my perception of society and power structures. they also informed my values to motivate me to keep learning. (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week seven). these core beliefs are central to who i am by shaping my outlook and how i approach life. the second aspect of my root beliefs are the values that are central to interpersonal relationships and community. my friendships, family and romantic relationships are extremely important to me, and the root values that shape them are constantly in use. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by bonding with people who can be both vulnerable and match my enthusiasm. i have social anxiety and had a few traumatic experiences in highschool with friendships. the residual trauma makes me overthink interactions with friends and i felt it was important to work with a professional. i started therapy knowing that in order to get the most out of it, i’d have to be honest, sharing the good and the bad. through therapy, my interpersonal relationships have improved as i now feel comfortable in myself and have the ability to trust others. in order to live what dr. brown calls a “whole-hearted” life, we must love ourselves in order to have healthy and love-filled connections to others. once we let down our barriers and accept the risk of being our most authentic selves, we build connections with other people. this cultivates meaningful relationships that make our lives fuller (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). once i’m able to be vulnerable with someone, i want to share all of my interests and quirks that make me happy. someone who can share themselves with me and affirm my vulnerability with their own enthusiasm is a person i know i will share a long and healthy connection with. i also believe that i am responsible for my own actions and the support and protection of others. the week 5 curriculum on healthy relationships helped define this root belief. through duloc and having open conversations about safety, i’ve been able to learn more about what a healthy relationship means. i also believe it's important to be your https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be brother or sister's keeper. relationships are centered on supporting one another and that includes helping them in a time of need. i want to continue this practice proactively caring for my peers. in fr. in kevin grove’s speech, he tells the audience, “we cannot love the god we don't see without loving the brother we do see” (''two notre dames: your holy cross education '' by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). this is central to a notre dame education because we center community and caring for one another. in conclusion, my personal and relationship oriented beliefs have guided my college experience thus far. through moreau, i’ve been able to clearly articulate these beliefs and identify where they are present in my life. in the future, i want to continue learning about my beliefs and the beliefs of others so i can challenge my own. by exploring what is important to me, my experience at notre dame has been an education for the head and the heart. integration two assignment - hicks 1 david lassen moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 encountering horizons as a community and an individual some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester can boil down to how to encounter relationships with others. how will i make the most of my notre dame experience in relation to others? and although i think many of these questions can not be perfectly answered right now, the things that we have discussed in this class help. for example, our week nine discussion helps address my previous question. when i first arrived at notre dame, i remember feeling overwhelmed and a bit intimidated by the intelligence here. i started to doubt my own abilities and definitely was experiencing forms of imposter syndrome. i remember feeling like everyone somehow got above average on every test, even though it’s statistically impossible, and that everyone had a clear plan. but i think it’s important to remember that, “this is a stressful and discouraging way to live. remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). i think that this is a really important insight because it shows the reality of life in an upfront way. we aren’t perfect and it’s unreasonable to say that we will always be perfect. and just as the quote touches on, i have failed and yet the world hasn’t crumbled down. but i think reminding ourselves of this reality is reassuring because it also shows that we aren’t alone. if we do our best, i think that is more than enough. we can’t do better than what we are physically and emotionally capable of doing, so it only makes sense that we should never expect more than that. hicks 2 if everyone adopted the mindset that the quote invokes, i think people would be just as productive and accomplished, but more importantly a lot happier. in the future, i hope to stay reasonable as this quote and our discussion encouraged. i think it’s okay to set goals and to push myself, within reasonable limits. my goal is to keep asking myself, “what advice would my parents give me in this moment?” to which my parents have always told me, “try your best but never at the sake of your health.” i think the second half of moreau also helped show me what has changed in importance in my life. i think i’ve placed more value on connections with others, the value of conversation and how i view self-care. from our week 10 discussion, it became more clear that viewing self-care in a positive light is more important than i had previously thought. for me, i have always just chugged on through and did what needed to be done without stopping to think about myself sometimes, and i continued this mindset for the first few weeks. and i think that wear and tear just is not a reasonable expectation i should have for myself. but i’m learning to have that conviction that this reasoning is right, even when i know it is. and, “without conviction, there would be no hope” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by julia hogan – moreau fye week ten). conviction is the thing that is absolutely essential for us to do good in the world. it gives us the strength and perseverance to stick to our guiding principles and do what is right in the world. and without it, we would all suffer. we would doubt the world and ourselves more than ever, and the world would appear hopeless. i really liked this insight because it reminds me of the power that hope has. without hope, i think the world would be a depressing place to live, especially since we would ask ourselves more than ever, “what is all of this for?” but in order to stay hopeful, we need conviction to stay on our path in life and know that it is leading us to a good place. if i look at the importance of self-care through the lens of hicks 3 hopefulness and conviction, i think i will really more than ever start to see its importance. my goal is that in the future i will allow myself to take time for myself more often and not rush from place to place. i have started this goal by trying to take more trips to our dorm’s chapel just for a quick moment of silence in my day. something before this semester began that was more simple that is now more complex is my faith beliefs. i think they changed mainly because i realized my role in the community at notre dame. in my english class here, we talked about how many people can still hold onto beliefs, even many people discredit them. our professor talked about this more in terms of morally incorrect beliefs, like racism, but i think this in a way can be expanded to faith. i think in college, more than ever, my faith beliefs have been challenged. in high school, my religion classes were more about memorizing things for a test, but never really having deep thought. but through a holy cross education, i’ve learned that “christians spread hope, and religious, like those in holy cross, have a special obligation to embolden others to pick up their crosses” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week twelve). when we come together as a christian family and as a community, it becomes easier to share our collective cross, as well as our personal crosses. i think this quote struck me because it reminded me that not just the religious are called for holiness. it isn’t easy to handle our own crosses and struggles, let alone encourage others through their own processes, but we have that satisfying obligation to do just that. my faith beliefs need to be things i truly believe and not just what i accept right away. there’s a need to struggle through them and i think it’s natural to do so. for the future, i hope to live out my own calling in the lens of my faith, but also make sure that i know what my faith really is and means. i have set a goal to start paying closer attention to the homilies to accomplish this goal, because i can often zone out. hicks 4 lastly, something that was complex for me but now is simple is how i should go about “fitting in” with the notre dame community. before coming here, i was worried i just wouldn’t make friends or that i would be too different. but after a semester, i’ve realized more of what a strong community boils down to. it isn’t about being friends with everyone and being loved by everyone to “fit in.” strong community isn’t about intimacy with everyone because “when community is reduced to intimacy, our world shrinks to a vanishing point: with how many people can one be genuinely intimate in a lifetime?” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). community should not be equivalent in our minds with intimacy because it’s unreasonable to say that we will become intimate and deeply know everyone in a community. strangers are found in a community, as well as the people closest in our lives. this range needs connectedness, not really intimacy. instead, i think it’s best to look at a community through the lens of unity and connectedness. we are called to live in a community. and i think we need others for comfort, encouragement, support, feedback, and much more. i think we are able to be our best selves when we help others to do the same. we need community to extend to close friends, strangers, and also enemies. we achieve community through connectedness, and community is one of the greatest gifts that we can have. it much more simple now: i don’t need to be friends with 250 girls in my dorm, but i do need to be encouraging. my goal to do this is to always wave to people in the hallways and give them a smile. it’s simple but an easy way to start building community and showing how i fit into ryan hall. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/modules/items/107402 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/modules/items/107402 hicks 5 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_sou rce=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commenceme nt/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ intergration fys what do i believe? there are many things that go into my life for what i believe in, such as getting good grades, dominating in the sport i love, believing in one another to accomplish great things in each other's lives, or simply believing and practicing my faith on a daily basis. but what do i believe though; well first off i believe in myself, this might sound corny but being able to believe in yourself and most importantly knowing you’re why in everything you do, goes a long way than doing that specific thing but have no real meaning to do it. what is my why? my why as an individual is to do something that i love dearly and do it to my full capability. more recently this has popped up more in my life as i got older but even more recently in the last month or so. especially in the game, i love so much dearly. many times in the last month or so i've second-guessed or been frustrated with myself or even doubted myself because i didn't think i was good enough or the coaches weren't playing me four things just weren't working out as i planned them to be. unfortunately, this has caused me to be very depressed from at one moment being on top of the world and having a great understanding of why i do what i do but now when there's more adversity thrown my way and it's been a while since i've accomplished the things i've set out for and it's hard to see through the light what my why currently is. after speaking to many individuals coaches teammates even professors about should even be here at this university or should i go somewhere else but they all told me the same thing. rocco, what do you believe in? go out and accomplish everything you have dreamed of as a kid, and when the going gets tough it’s only going to get tougher till you finally achieve it. as of right now, i have now switched my mindset that i do believe in myself and others that believe in me it’s now just acting upon it and waiting for my opportunity to release what i am capable of. from week 1 searching for belonging i use this daily in my life especially throughout this whole semester so i understand who i am and where i'm from and what type of group i belong to at this university. during dr. brown’s commentary, when she mentions shame a vulnerability, and how this coordinates with worthiness, how does this relate to yourself and belonging? dr. brown states that “people who have a strong sense of belonging believe that they love a sense of belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” brené brown, tedxhouston) i can relate to this within my own life, especially as of right now. i come from a fantastic family who always dedicates their time and love for our entire family. my parents always strive for all of us to be the best in everything we do. in most cases, this shows up frequently on the field as well as in the classroom. furthermore from week 2, how can i grow as my most authentic self? growing as my most authentic self doesn’t have a necessary road or pathway to do it. the way i live my life https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 compared to other individuals will be vastly different, but that’s what makes up our society. people who are different and come from many forms and backgrounds might even shape how you live your life. from the survey, how can i use “hope” to better my most authentic self. the survey states that hope is, “expecting the best in the future and working to achieve it; believing that a good future is something that can be brought about.” (via character strengths survey (via adult survey) . if i use hope in my everyday life, such as setting goals and where i want to be by the end of the week, month, or even five years from now, how and what will i do to get there. what will i have to self-sacrifice to have the most authentic life? i believe the sacrifice will be time either having fun with friends and family and grinding things that will set me up better in the future with a high paying job, be being authentic can also be apart of it such as being myself and treating others with respect and expanding your networking because the more people you meet the better. according to week 3 searching for my framework involves a in-depth way of thinking and how i live my life according to my faith, fr. pete showcases that in the video and how i can pursue for the better. “how do we see a knot in our shoelaces?” (the role of faith in our story) i believe fr. pete is trying to explain that in life, sometimes it’s easy as tying your shoes. you are on the path that you want to be on. everything seems to be going great for you. unfortunately, life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows; it’s a very mean and dark place. the knot in the shoelace that represents somedays are going to be very challenging, it isn’t going to be easy, but the way we handle the challenges or the bumps in the road or this scenario, the knots in the shoelaces is going to have an outcome on how we live our lives. week 4, "in what ways may i forge life-giving relationships?" the double whiskey video showed me, that being intoxicated is not an excuse for someone to get hurt and say i love you. what we do has great repercussions for what happens when we have too much alcohol. unfortunately, we may love the people but us drinking and not being smart about it can genuinely hurt the people we love in ways that we can regret for the rest of our lives. "because i love you, double whiskey" (one love foundation)i believe we’ve all been a part of them with toxic friendships or may still be in them. currently, i just ended one it took me a very long time to come to justice that i was in one. my best friends who i can always rely on, mentioned to me multiple tmes that i needed to break up this certain friendship and it was holding me back, i always made excuses of what was happening and justifying what happened. after i found myself feeling like i was always doing it, it didnt strike me till recently when i finally had enough, this toxic relationship was just holding me bcak from where i can be in my future. my friends said i made the right decision of doing it but honestly hurt but i know it’s for the best in the long run. although i lost a friendship, i know the friends i have now will always be there for me and give the best advice possible, that’s how friendships should be. week 5, allow me to take a step back for my life and crafts idea of how i'm doing throughout the semester my mental well-being and how i am as an individual. i usually never think like this, i always i'm thinking of the next thing i have to do or accomplish in my life or the next test orassignment i just need to complete for a grade but i'm never really thinking about https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102691 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102691 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry myself. this gave me the tools necessary to understand more about me and how i'm doing. yes so far i am doing pretty well at times it can be very challenging and mentally draining but that's the cost of being at such a prestigious university. week 6, gave me an opportunity to create something very creative i personally allows me to showcase where i'm from and meaningful things that helps me along the way and or are from my hometown. this type of poetry is a lot different than reading it out of a book they showcased my feelings and my love of who i am my family and where i grew up. i never thought of myself as being a poetry writer and i possibly still don't but this gave me an opportunity the show my writing skills and bring back some enjoyable moments from my hometown. week 7, brought a new way of thinking about our society and our political values i thought this was a critical way of thinking because from many demographics we think of people in many different ways. and thinking about the certain things might not always feel right you might feel like you're even judging them at times but this from the reading show that is totally normal but we should empower ourselves to do better and welcome all the different groups of people around our world and get to know them to be a better individual and more importantly a better society. overall from these past 7 weeks i can use all of these modules to help create a better environment on and off campus and more importantly a better self image of myself. to be a better person that is loving and caring and can show compassion when needed, if we all do this or use the tools provided we can take one step closer to creating a better world. lastly, i believe that we are capable of all things it just takes effort, love and passion to create these things. moreau integration 1 evolving questions and answers leaving my hometown, i arrived at notre dame with very few expectations. i hoped to discover more about myself; however, i never honestly thought i would learn so much in such a brief period. only eight weeks into my college experiences, i found some answers and had plenty of new experiences, including irish football games. nevertheless, several of the big questions i have only just begun to explore and seek out answers. while i have discovered some answers, i have equally come across more questions, and several of my answers have changed. my college experience, i believe, will allow for my questions and answers to evolve, which i can only look forward to my discoveries. when i initially applied to notre dame, i applied as an economics major. i believed that after college, i would attend either business or law school, but the longer i have been in college, the more i question whether i want to spend the rest of my life in either of those careers. now i believe that i am searching for a career that i enjoy, but more than that, i am searching for my life-long friends. the day before classes started, i watched a video called "the power of vulnerability." while it was just an assignment, i understood the vitality of vulnerability in creating relationships, especially in new places. brown stated, "as a result of authenticity, they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do that for connection." which explains the importance of vulnerability to establish relationships ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). the more i experienced college, the more i discovered this truth: relationships forged on one's authenticity last a lifetime. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104190 this experience subsequently led to another belief because i discovered i grew through these experiences in which i utilized vulnerability. moreover, my growth only happened as a result of exploring outside of my comfort zone. david brooks describes the importance of combating one's weaknesses when stating, "you go into yourself, you find the sin which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed" ("should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). in general, people find attempting to combat one's weakness uncomfortable. however, by turning these weaknesses into strengths, one genuinely grows. i have learned that when i feel unsure about whether i want to explore beyond my comfortable boundaries, i should because it causes growth. one of the ways i explored beyond my comfort zone is in my quest for truth. i believe that i pursue truth by never just accepting something but asking questions. while i understand the importance of blind faith, i constantly encounter questions with answers that only lead to more questions. even though this is a never-ending journey, it provides me with the opportunity to explore my faith and beliefs. each person's faith journey differs, which is why exploring a variety of stories about people's faith journey is more helpful than relying on one person's journey to discover your's ("student reflections on faith" by campus ministry moreau fye week three). one of the ways i commonly seek answers to my questions is through prayer and reflection. no one on earth has all the answers, and i definitely do not, which is why i turn to the only being who does. fr. sorin describes his experience when he turned to god when he could not produce an answer. he said, "tell me, father, could priests of our lady of the holy cross and brothers of st. joseph refuse such an offer? however, i did not wish to precipitate matters. i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104201 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing took time to pray and reflect" ("letter to father general moreau" by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). by turning to god for wisdom and answers, one can obtain some form of a solution. it might not directly answer a question, but it provides some direction in one’s search for answers. one of the ways i find direction in my search, in addition to prayer and reflection, is consulting my peers. especially at notre dame, everyone has a unique background with diverse perspectives. by listening to these perspectives, i can look for commonalities or even attempt to understand other beliefs. i believe that my community includes a variety of views, of which all should be heard. these varying perspectives come from each person’s influences ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). brooks discusses the importance of various perspectives when he says, "finally, these are shared stories; this shared knowledge should help us discover a shared destiny and our shared affection for one another" ("how to destroy truth" by david brooks moreau fye week seven). by each person sharing their stories, we as a community gain more knowledge and insight. i have encountered incredible people here, and their perspectives have opened my eyes to many different beliefs, which i find interesting. one of the most important things human beings should do is listen to each other and our stories. especially on college campuses, each student should stand up and defend other students. i believe that i am responsible for my actions and responses. specifically, in situations that look suspicious, i know that if i should respond a certain way, i must respond. the notre dame student-athlete video states, "approach the situation" ("it's on us nd the three d's of being an active bystander" moreau fye week four). one of the best ways to protect fellow students is by actually approaching situations. by entering into situations, we can do more than if we https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104258 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104258 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104265 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/modules/items/104265 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view merely act as if we did not witness anything. i constantly keep this in mind; however, so far i have been fortunate enough never to have to involve myself in any bad situation. while i have learned a lot about my personal beliefs from my time here, i still have years left of lessons to absorb and experiences to discover. nevertheless, the moreau class has provided me with much good advice on adjusting to life here at notre dame, and i look forward to what materials will be covered throughout the rest of the course. geiger mr. anthony polotto moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 encounters at notre dame have transformed my life college is a time in every individual’s life that can be incredibly challenging. students move to new places, make new friends, become independent, miss people from home, and have to learn how to balance all aspects of their lives. all these circumstances have the potential to change students’ perspectives regarding their place in life. coming to notre dame, i had absolutely no idea what the future held for me. i was worried about all the changes that would come, yet i was also excited at the prospect of being able to start the next chapter of my life. in the short three months that i have been here, my notre dame experience has been transformative. i have encountered many new challenges, perspectives, and an overwhelming sense of hope for my future. all prospective college students hear that the academic jump from high school to college is very challenging and is sometimes not handled well by students. people say that this is because the majority of the learning takes place outside of the classroom and students do not have the discipline to work on their own. in my own experience, i have found that it is true that my academic success is in my own hands. this is not because professors do not care about the success of their students; instead, these educators are not going to handhold students through every situation as teachers do in high school. i have found that this adjustment can be a bit challenging at times. furthermore, as a result of this new style of learning, i have not always done as well on assignments as i would have liked. however, i have to remind myself of julia hogan’s belief. she tells us to “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). i find it to be incredibly devastating when i do not achieve my goals. what i have to continue to tell myself, and what hogan reminds all of us, is that accomplishments are not the only factor that determines whether or not my life is a success or failure; instead, there are a whole variety of aspects of life that make it complete. this includes, but is not limited to, friendship, self-care, leisure, exercise, spirituality, and, of course, achievements. all of these factors make my life complete. despite these academic hardships that i have encountered, i have also learned the importance of being a well-rounded person and have come to enjoy all aspects of my life. just as i have experienced difficulties at notre dame, i have also encountered new perspectives. one of the best parts of the college experience is the opportunity to meet new people who have entirely different perspectives, experiences, and circumstances in life. unfortunately, just as in every part of american culture, there are many individuals who do not feel welcome in our community. sometimes this is a result of underlying racism that exists. father christopher devron writes, “racism exists in systems or structures, as opposed to consisting merely of private acts of bigotry committed by individuals” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau first year experience week 10). i have heard people have perspectives about racism that i do not believe are accurate. in my university seminar class, we are reading the 1619 project. i learn about the ways that slavery and racism still negatively impact african-americans throughout the country. i had never heard about many of these horrible truths before coming to notre dame. these articles from class only strengthen my belief that more needs to be done to address the inequalities still present today. one of the best ways that i believe that inclusion can be achieved is by encountering and embracing those who are different from me. i can do this by expanding my sense of community. parker palmer writes, “community does not depend on intimacy and must expand to embrace strangers, even enemies, as well as friends” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau first year experience week 11). college is the perfect time to grow this idea of “community.” i have tried to encounter as many people with different backgrounds as possible. i have friends with different geographical locations, different races, and different socioeconomic backgrounds. these individuals are far different from the ones that i know in my hometown. i have encountered students who are completely different from me; however, this has only worked to make me a more complete person. as a result, in part, of the new perspectives in my life, i have experienced a great deal of hope going forward. notre dame has helped to strengthen my sense of hope for my life. i believe that it can be very easy to become frustrated or even scared for what the future holds in store. fortunately, the overwhelming presence of religion that i have encountered at notre dame has brought me peace during the uncertainty of life. the emphasis on religion is a crucial part of a holy cross education. they write, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau fye week 12). i believe that god is synonymous with the word hope. i have hope that struggles will improve. i have hope that deceased loved ones will greet us upon death. i have hope that the crises plaguing our world will be solved. whenever grappling with a challenge, i put my faith in god that he will make it better. by attending this catholic institution, the sense of faith that i have encountered has only strengthened this sense of hope. my time at notre dame has furthered my trust in religion, which is exactly what a holy cross education wants every student to encounter. at just the beginning of my notre dame journey, i have encountered challenges, people with entirely different perspectives, and an increasing feeling of hope in my life. more specifically, the academic environment at notre dame is one that i was not used to in high school. that being said, i have also come to realize that all aspects of my life should be grown, not just my academic side. second, all the new people that i have encountered have helped to broaden my sense of community to make all people feel welcome around me. last, by delving deeper into my religion, i have experienced an overwhelming feeling of hope for my future, which has brought me great peace. in three short months, notre dame has transformed my experiences and perspectives in life. my time at college has made me a completely different person for the better, and i cannot wait to see where the rest of my time at notre dame takes me. claudia o’sullivan moreau integration one october 15, 2021 going to college, most of your life changes and this switch-up allows you to reflect and decide how you want to conduct your new life. however, it sometimes creates room to lose touch with your actual self in the search for who you want to be. here lies the balance between growth and inauthenticity. gratefully, i think notre dame’s family and value oriented community promotes growth and prevents falling into ingenuity. below are 3 personal beliefs and explanations that i have formed so far in this voyage of self discovery! 1. i believe my purpose is to help others 1) keep their will to live and persevere and 2) remind them how much they matter. both my sister and my good friend pablo fought cancer when they were kids. when i ask them about the hardest part of the battle, they have similar replies: 1) maintaining a will to keep fighting and 2) feeling so close to death for so long. their experiences completely changed my understanding of faith and how i want to lead my life. first, they are both religious now. in those times of alienation and struggle, religion served as a reminder to them that they should have a will to keep fighting because they matter. it showed them that they are supposed to be here for a reason, and it gave them control in a situation that felt helpless. religion also reframes your perspective on mortality whether it’s because there’s an afterlife or just because you know you should spend every minute you have on this planet with intention. in the words of carla harris, “while we can all get more money, more houses, etc., we can never get more time. therefore, we should be extremely intentional with it and spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week five). in this shift in perspective, there is an appreciation for mortality. if i thought i had eternity, i wouldn’t have the same commitment to my life and loving others. i hope that for others i can do what religion did for them. i learned that i want to spend my time reminding people why they should have a will to wake up every day and how special they are. whether it’s someone fighting cancer or a senior citizen, everyone is a perfect puzzle piece to the world and sometimes it just takes a little extra love and inspiration to remember that. fr. mccormick’s tips were to 1) be patient 2) keep a fresh perspective 3) remain hopeful and 4) don’t do it alone (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). whether through volunteering at holy cross village or having late night heart-to-hearts with my friends, if i can help anyone implement any of this advice in their own life, i’ll be living for my eulogy baby! 2. i believe that to grow in the healthiest way, i need to keep fidelity to my past self and be honest with myself. i believe that often the worst things lead to the best ones. it’s like that cliche saying the cracks in your heart are where the light comes in. the happiest time of my life followed the time where i felt the saddest and least inspired. i didn’t realize i was on quicksand until i fell in. and even though it hurt for a bit, i am so grateful i fell in because it allowed me to reflect and change everything that wasn’t working for me. but i don’t think it should take depression or suffering to realize that life is about continual growth and internalizing that our imperfections are human. as david brooks pointed out: “we're often not taught to recognize the sin in ourselves, in that we're not taught in this culture how to wrestle with it, how to confront it, and how to combat it” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). not being taught to wrestle those “sins”, speaking for myself, pushes one to try to block it all out. in trying to ignore all of the imperfections in my life, i inevitably numbed both the good and the bad. dishonesty with myself just led to faulty relationships and prevented actual happiness. and although it hurt badly to confront everything within myself, that pain reminded me that it was a battle worth fighting. as brene brown stated: “i’m so grateful because this vulnerability means i’m alive” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe an important part of my journey of improvement lies in keeping fidelity to my past self. if i try to act like that past version of myself never existed and don’t empathize with how i acted, it’s not loving and productive for my current self. miley cyrus once said in an interview: “be curious, not furious.” that is my favorite quote of all time. when she mentioned it, she was talking about how she’s sober because she found that she is her worst self when under the influence. but she said that, in her path towards sobriety, whenever she got mad at herself, she just made it harder to be sober. because when she was “furious” at herself, she wasn’t making an effort to understand why she acted the way she did. i hope that as i continue to grow in these next 4 years, whenever i do something that i am not proud of, i am able to be “curious” as to why i did it, vulnerable, and honest so i can improve. 3. i believe that i must learn to love the tension between two opposing ideas, in other words, the “grey area.” f. scott fitzgerald once said: “the test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.” whether it’s trying to find truth in the current “epistemic crisis” or befriending people in college who were raised completely different than me, i’m learning that sometimes truth lies in juggling and accepting two opposing thoughts. it’s similar to accepting both religion and science. although they sometimes conflict, they are both means of searching for truth and can work together to help us understand how the world works and our purpose in it. in the past, i would run away from this type of conflict. but, i’ve learned that if i accept an extreme then i’ll never reach any truth. as adichie explained, “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven)”. if i only feel comfortable with a single story, i’ll never understand any person or culture completely and be able to listen to them completely. in the article on toxic friendships in week 4, it mentioned that “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). when i rely on single stories out of fear of complication, i can’t give that unbridled attention to others where i’m listening fully. not to mention, i believe this tension is what life's all about. nothing is black and white, which is what makes it so special when you find a love for something or someone that makes none of that discomfort matter. in the words of fagerberg, “when we experience these moments — either by giving love or receiving it — then we realize what is fundamental. we have been swimming in waters that feel bottomless, but on such occasions our toes just touch the bedrock. and as love dawns, so does our sight” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). there wouldn’t be a point to life if there was an answer. and since there isn’t, when you find something that helps you catch your breath when you’re drowning in those “bottomless” waters, it’s the most perfect thing. moreau integration 3 integration three moreau first year experience 3/5/22 “we need joy as we need air. we need love as we need water. we need each other as we need the earth to share” (maya angelou quote by maya angelou). it seems as though the key into unlocking a life that is well lived is through the three components that maya angelou discussed in her quote above: joy, love, and one another. throughout julie’s life she seemed to have a strong understanding that in order to truly live a life that is enriched, it is crucial to not only receive and experience these three components, but also exalt these aspects so that others may also live a life that is well lived. whether it is through completing a kind act for others or simply furthering a relationship with another, joy can not only lead to love but also a sense of kinship among others that may have not been present before a particular experience. julie made it a personal goal to continue to place herself in situations where she can not only enrich her own life but also make a positive difference in the lives of others. she also exemplified complete reliance on god as a compass in her decision making. julie was a person who longed to enrich her own life through joy, love and through her ability to recognize god in each person she encountered and her willingness to bring joy to the lives of others so that each person has the opportunity to live a life that is well lived. ever since julie was a child, she always had an innate desire to express her unique qualities and never waver from who she was as a person. whether it was through being the only student in her grade who participated in the science fair, or the only girl in eighth grade who was in the school band, she always recognized her unique passions and embraced them even if others viewed those passions negatively. due to her uniqueness, it seemed as though she was ostracized from many situations when she was younger. this caused her to continue to struggle between embracing her own self but also suffer with the idea that, since she was different, others will not also embrace her uniqueness and appreciate diversity. this idea was also addressed by jihoon kim in which he described, “...when hardships and unexpected https://www.goodnewsnetwork.org/maya-angelou-quote-on-joy-and-love/ things happen to us, we often focus on the things we do not have”("5 minutes" by jihoon kimmoreau fye week six). even though julie was able to embrace her passions, she found herself continuing to struggle to truly understand ways she can both be unique and also enhance her relationships with others. however, she soon realized that through recognizing her passions she has the ability to truly experience joy which can therefore further guide her to understand god’s plan for herself and continue to use her passions as a compass in her life. in an article by father himes, he further emphasizes this point by stating, “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”(“three key questions'' by father michael himesmoreau fye week 3). in this quotation, father himes provides a unique perspective in which he describes that joy is able to be found more within through embracing one’s own passions and recognizing one’s uniqueness. through recognizing her passions, julie was able to find joy in participating in the science fair and the band, even if others viewed these passions as strange or foreign. through recognizing these passions at a young age, julie was truly able to understand the true meaning of joy within herself and therefore become prepared to experience joy with those around her. as julie grew and matured, she began to realize that she can not only gain an understanding of herself through deep reflection but also through experiencing “life giving” relationships with those she encountered. when julie applied to different scholarships and jobs , she received a series of interviews and each interview had a similar question, “what is something that you are proud of?” she responded to the interview question by stating that she was most proud of her values that encircle the importance of family and developing relationships with others. she continued to refer to her experiences with family as a catalyst for setting a foundation that guided her to an individual who embraces her faith but also understands the importance of using her morals to enact positive impact. her family has not only guided her to recognize joy within herself but also guided her in understanding not only julie’s commendable qualities but also addressing certain qualities that she has the ability to improve or adjust. even though julie had many positive qualities, it would be a mistake to forget her perfectionism and her sensitivity to constructive criticism (reflection assignmentmoreau fye week 5). as she grew, she began to see these https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 flaws as opportunities to not only enhance herself as a person but also enhance relationships with others through being vulnerable and understanding herself from another perspective. julie’s experience with enriching relationships has also provided a catalyst in her longing to integrate herself into communities that value aspects of faith, community, and integrity. this guided julie to choose a college that embraced these components but also challenged her to look deeply within herself in order to truly understand her core values that she can rely on throughout her life. in a presentation by kiersten dehaven, she emphasizes this point by stating, “the fortitude and discipline notre dame helped me develop, with an appreciation for community and faith, are what help me get through the good and the bad”("domer dozen" by kiersten dehavenmoreau fye week 2). her time at notre dame not only immersed her into new experiences but has also reinforced her understanding of the importance of community. this focus on community and faith has emboldened her to take the lessons she has learned at notre dame and apply them to every aspect of her life and use her education as a catalyst for positive change. through recognizing herself and realizing the joy that is brought from cultivating relationships with others, it guided julie to recognize god’s presence in those she encountered and therefore further cultivate her life on a deeper level. her passion to make a positive difference in the lives of others provided a pathway for her to immerse herself in service with others. julie’s first experience with working with those in need involved working at a soup kitchen called “face to face” in philadelphia. during her time serving in the soup kitchen, she encountered numerous individuals in need, however julie was constantly taken aback by their overwhelming gratitude and kindness despite the numerous struggles that each person was experiencing. father gregory boyle furthers this point by stating, “close both eyes: see with the other one…our sphere has widened and we find ourselves quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love. we’ve wandered into god’s own ‘jurisdiction’”(tattoos on the heart by father gregory boylemoreau fye week 7). through relinquishing the barriers that may have been set between herself and those julie was serving with, she was genuinely able to experience “god’s jurisdiction” and it provided a catalyst into her passion to recognize god’s presence in each person and each experience that she encountered throughout her life. https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://domerdozen.nd.edu julie’s experience with service guided her to use her education as a method into enhancing “god’s jurisdiction” throughout the world. this guided her to immerse herself into the medical field and integrate her passions for science and making a positive impact on the lives of others. after reading the article from the meruelo center for career development, it guided her to understand that her success and joy in the career aspect of her life immediately comes from her understanding of her own morals and ways that she can immerse those values into her career. ("navigating your career journey”meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). through using her career as a method to create a world where each person has the opportunity to experience and provide joy, julie enriched not only the lives of others but also her own life her life on a deeper level julie constantly longed to understand herself and use her own qualities to bring joy and also experience joy from herself and also from life giving relationships. julie was someone who longed to use her own qualities in order to better herself and further understand her relationship with god through recognizing god’s presence within herself. through embracing her unique qualities, she used those qualities as a compass in making major life decisions that impacted her entire perspective on the world. even though she may not be present on this earth, her impact will continue forever and also inspire those she encountered to live a life with joy, love, and kinship with others. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ norman 1 father kevin sandberg fys 10101.7 3 december 2021 lever-up! i have never been one to acknowledge that i have or need a lever in my life. i have grown since my days of trying to move the world without a lever, but still feel the residual pull to do things independently. archimedes said, “give me a place to stand and with a lever, i will move the whole world”. taking moreau this semester demonstrated to me that notre dame can be my place to stand and the people i meet can be my lever. this class reaffirmed my path towards leaning on others more because, as an example, a discussion we had emphasized even if you live by eulogy virtues, people must be left to share those virtues and your stories (week 2). if you push others away and always focus on the next biggest thing, no one will never get to know what kind of heart and soul you have. when thinking about my rules of life for week 12, i added “be where your feet are” because of this exact point. without another cat to talk back to, there would be no talking cats. when i think of what i am made for, i am drawn back into my major discernment process during senior year of high school. i had all these ideas about what i could go into during college, but when it came down to the “why major?” portion of the application, i drew a blank. i thought i needed to fit into a picture-perfect box with a grandiose plan as to why i wanted to go into the career i would study for. it was hard for me to be vulnerable with myself, because like brené brown, i was afraid of not being accepted, and in this case, by whatever field i went into (week 1). at one point, i wanted to be a doctor like my grandpa. i then moved onto wanting to be a veterinarian like my dad. i realized, though, through the power of vulnerability, that i liked those professions because they helped people. i do not like medicine, which was a hard pill to swallow, but once i did, my eyes were open to the many fields of study that i knew i could be made for. after lots of soul searching, i realized that i would be happy in a career where i could integrate my passion of science and math into my desire to positively impact the world. i took a leap of faith choosing to study engineering because i did not know exactly what it entailed, and, honestly, i still do not. however, for now, i know that i am enjoying the classes and that the career options that fulfill my criteria are endless. i am made for this area of study because i chose it. again, this acceptance is a hard hurdle to pass because of the dilemma of others’ expectations (julia hogan, week 9). outside stressors make me want to know exactly how i will use my engineering degree or exactly why i feel a pull to make my career one that gives back to others, but if i am confident in myself, i give importance to the things in my life that matter. nevertheless, i also acknowledge that i am made for god’s love and the love of other people. i can use my faith in god and in others as me lever to achieve the goals i have in my life because they are the framework through which the big picture of life can be achieved (week 3). although the support of others and god will take off some of the weight of the lever that will help me achieve my goals, what i am made of will be the lever. this semester has consisted of a lot of self-discoveries, mainly learning how to use both my good and bad qualities to my strength. in the past, i wanted a single story of me to be portrayed—that i was independent, motivated, and had my life figured out—to the world so instead of other people’s dignity being broken, i broke my own (chimamanda ngozi adichie, week 7). but i realized that the ground i stand on is all of my past experiences, where i am from, that led me to where i am now—at notre dame as a chemical engineer hoping to have a career that will help heal even the smallest portion of the world. where i’m from is my friends and family that sacrifice for me so that i feel their love and can gain opportunities (week 6). knowing this piece of me gives me the persistence to follow my dreams no matter how big. using the resources from moreau, i have been able to reflect on my character traits, the qualities of my relationships, and institutionalized biases in the world. it led me to remain concrete on this important part of me because although my being at notre dame will change in the future or chemical engineering might change, my reasons for choosing both of those things will always remain. it represents my deepest desires and what my life’s discernment has led up to at this point. i have found value in accepting what is true of the moment, while still acknowledging that things may change, because otherwise i would stress about the next hour of every day rather than living in the current second. i am made of whatever i want to be made of and if my lever needs to be repainted or remade from a stronger material (or levered up;)), i will remain the same and the ground i stand on will as well. i am so thankful for moreau this semester because it forced me to give time to myself during a period when i prioritized other things. getting to know myself was difficult and consuming at times, but moreau allowed me to be able to answer what i am made for and what i am made of with minimal stress. the facilitated discussions and outside resources led me to the many conclusions i have made about myself recently. i know that what i am made for and of now does not need to be the same my whole life. the world will change, my lever will change, and the ground i stand on will change. however, moreau taught me acceptance of that change because of my acceptance of myself. who will i be? it is an interesting experience to come back to a predominately traditional college after being out of school for seven years. it is most interesting because i have already begun seeing changes in myself when i thought i had a good idea of who i am. however, in my self-reflection, i have not noticed changes in my root beliefs. that is not to say there will never be changes in those because i have noticed them change over the last few years. i think the idea of “root” is too steadfast and unchanging. our minds and goals change throughout our life, regardless of the stage we are in. below are some root beliefs that have brought me where i am today. 1) i believe that i grow by facing the challenges that scare me the most. 2) i believe that without a community i would not be where i am today. 3) i believe that learning to accept yourself is needed for inner peace. as someone who has struggled with anxiety that left me in an unhealthy mental state, i know that acceptance of yourself is crucial to having inner peace. now, when i say inner peace, i don’t mean happiness, a person can be at peace without being happy. however, i do believe that if you have that inner peace then it is much easier to be happy with what life has to offer. i think dr. brown’s discussion of vulnerability being the cornerstone for happiness and joy sums up this idea perfectly. throughout dealing with my sickness in mental health, i found that i was the loneliest and most unhappy when i isolated myself from others. at the time i told myself it was a defense mechanism to protect myself, but it was really a way to hide that i didn’t know who i was. continuing with the idea of self-acceptance, david brooks’ discussion on the differences between adam one and two is relevant to the discussion. brooks’ statement that adam 2 is built on fighting his weaknesses to be successful rather than finding success in the world is the better adam to strive for. initially, i agreed that building a foundation as a person is best to do first, and then begin working on worldly success. however, i think my perception of the discussion has changed through attending these moreau classes. father kevin’s way of perceiving weaknesses as only “strengths that need work” resonated with me. i think it hurts our ability to accept ourselves if we see everything we do as weaknesses. i say this with hesitance because there are attributes that every person needs to work on, but i think looking at these “weaknesses” differently promotes self-acceptance. i have learned the hard way that community is such an important aspect of life. due to my background, i had the tendency to isolate myself from others. i had close friends, but they were few and far between. to this day, it still takes me longer to form relationships then the average person, but it is one of those lesser strengths i am working on. i have found that i am happiest and most in tune with life when i have a strong sense of belonging from the people i am surrounded by. professor fagerberg’s line that “to love is to will the good of another” was a lesson that i learned the most in my time in the navy. there were plenty of people i did not get along with, but we were still a family because we could love each other enough to support one another. with this sense of community fueling an individual’s success, it also incorporates the need to lookout for each other. although the video may have been cheesy, notre dame’s discussion on bystander intervention is important to maintain a supportive community. i think learning these lessons now ensures people learn what that sense of togetherness really means. there have been plenty occurrences in my life that could have gone worse if it had not been for my friends protecting me. my community of friends and family has supported me tremendously, but they have also challenged me. chimamanda ngozi adichie’s advice on avoiding a “single-story” is accomplished through an open-mind and a community that is willing to challenge you as an individual. even in my short time here, i have found a group of people that are willing to challenge me, and i love it. i have learned so much academically and about life because they are willing to teach me. allowing this sense of growth also works towards eradicating that single story mind set. fear is the number one reason individuals don’t do things that could help them grow. it seems that everyone is afraid of failing, so instead of trying they just sit back and let opportunities go. i have been subjected to this fear, there have been plenty of moments in my life that i chose to hide rather than face that fear. i think it is safe to say that a lot of students that attend notre dame have a fear of failing, of not being “good enough”. however, the nice thing about being older is that i have learned from my past mistakes. i have learned that without that bravery in facing the fear, i do not grow as a person. being accepted to notre dame was exciting, but i was terrified. i had moments of doubt over the summer about whether i should attend, whether i was good enough. since i am older, i am a few steps behind academically. yet, i knew that i could not let this opportunity go, especially after waiting six long years to finally work toward my dreams. i knew from past experiences that i needed to do this. as carla harris states, “fear has no place in your success equation,” this was another quote that resonated with me. one that truly reminded me why i am doing what i am doing. riley's moreau intergration riley 1 philip riley 10/24/2021 moreau integration the way i shape my life prompt: what do i believe? the way you attack this prompt is by searching within yourself and discovering what beliefs were instilled into you from a young age. here are some root beliefs that i was raised on when i was a kid. i believe that my purpose in life is to give back to the community that i was raised in and too change people life for the better. the way i have come to believe this is that my mom used to tell my siblings and i that its the people who were born strong to protect those who are not as fortunate or strong enough to protect themselves; the way this influences my decisions is that i go out my way to help others and i try to put myself in a position to give back. another root belief that i have is that i believe that i grow by surrounding myself wih successful and motivated people. since i was young i was told by my football coaches is that the way you get ahead in life is by surrounding yourself with people who want success for themselves because if you are around people who do bad or not motivated it can affect the way you act or carry yourself. in highschool this belief was challenge constantly because you are surrounded by others who are still searching for their meaning in life and by people who are just trying to find the easy way out of situations. the way i combated this was i stayed away from those type of people and kept working to make my goals reality. the last root belief i am going to talk about is 2 that i believ that i am responsible for shaping my future and how i want to live my life when i retire. i was told often as a kid that one day my future will be my responsibility and the choices i make will come with a set of consequences so from that point on i have been making sure that i take advantage of every opportunity that comes my way so that i can set myself up for success in the future. in recent years my beliefs have not change much but they have adapted to my circumstances and the environment that i am in like my recent transition to notre dame. week one’s qqc deals with ones sense of belonging. when i first saw the focus question "in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?" i thought about my recent transition to notre dame and how when i first got here i stayed to myself and was stressed out because it was a big step in my life football and academically speaking but as i started to find my footing and meet some nice people, i realized with the help of (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) that the only way i am going to find what i have been searching for is by making myself vulnerable. by making myself vulnerable i will be able to learn from others a which in return will make me feel like i am part of a healthy community (sense of belonging). week two’s qqc deals with searching for self-knowledge. the (via character strengths survey (via adult survey) helped me find out more about myself and the different characteristics which could help me at my time at notre dame like building connections and finding opportunities to help better myself. week three’s qqc talks about searching for a framework. this deals with how religion and faith dictates how i view world and the people around me. (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three) helped me think about how i approach every situation in regard to my religion (christianity). i believe that sticking close to faith, hope and love it will help me be 3 more positive and think about the world more lightly. accepting god into my life has helped me tremendously with the many unique situations that i have encountered. week four qqc deals with searching for life-giving relationships which caught my attention because i am a firm believer that who you surround yourself with is who you become and if you surround yourself with people who are motivated then you wil be motivated too but if you surround yourself with lazy people than you will be lazy as well. the article (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four) helped me identify what relationships that i have are beneficial to me (healthy) and what relationships are not beneficial to me and bringing me down (toxic). week five qqc talks about identifying narratives and how my development relates to notre dames mission. (“letter to bl. basil moreau" by fr. sorin moreau fye week five) discusses god’s will and the begining of notre dame and its mission. week six qqc talks about identifying influences. i think about where i am from and how my childhood friends and experiences influenced me and made me who i am today. (“where im from poem” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) is a poem describing george’s early life like how it was and what he was like; he also talks about where he is from and what his family was like. week seven qqc is about identifying perspectives and implicit bias which is discussed in the text (“"how to think about 'implicit bias'"” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris, scientific americanmoreau fye week seven) this helped me understand that most individuals are implicitly biased even if they do not think of themselves as it; so i started to think about instances i might be biased in and how i can improve myself in that aspect which will help me be successful in the future at notre dame. moreau integration 12/3/2021 finding my voice and finding myself this semester has been one of the most rewarding times of my life where i feel i’ve had the most growth as a person. i’ve gained so much clarity on who i am, the person i want be, and the things i value the most. one of the biggest challenges i was facing coming into the school year was mental health and having a support system. last semester was extremely challenging, and coming back to notre dame in the fall i felt i had no friends, a rocky relationship with my teammates and coaches, and no idea who i was. i’ve had countless experiences this past semester that have changed all of this. this semester, i’ve made a huge shift in believing in myself, and not basing my selfworth on external factors. in week 9, one quote said, “when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). this quote really resonated with me because this is something i struggled with for a long time and continue to struggle with. specifically, this fall, competing in tennis and representing notre dame, i put a lot of expectation on myself. i also put the pressure of not wanting to let me teammates and coaches down with every match that i played. in late november, i went to florida and had two bad losses in a row. i went to my coach after, crying about how i had felt i was constantly letting her down and how that pressure held me back from me being able to play my best tennis. after that conversation, it became clear to me that the expectations i was putting on https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau myself were hindering my true potential. i came out to my next few matches playing some of the best tennis i had the whole semester. even though i still struggle with this, i think i’ve come a long way from where i started. for most of my life, i’ve based my self-worth on external things like how i perform in a sport, how other people perceive me, or how i do in school. this semester, i’ve learned to surround myself with people who don’t judge me, and truly want the best for me. because i’ve surrounded myself with these types of people, it’s proved to me that the person i am, as myself, is worthy enough. and because of this, i’ve really let go of expectations that i put on myself, or expectation i believe others have for me. though i’m not perfect, i think i have come a long way in not letting my self-worth be based on how i perform on the tennis court, or how other people perceive me. another area that has grown in importance to me this semester is my voice. not only have i realized the importance in speaking up about things you are passionate about, but i learned that my voice has weight in the communities around me. one thing i’ve really learned to speak up about this semester is mental health. not only have i personally felt how much mental health affects your life, but i have also heard and seen countless number of friends who have gone through similar experiences. because of this, i became part of a mental health committee for student-athletes, and really voiced my struggles to my own teammates. i have formed deeper and stronger connection by being vulnerable with my own mental health struggles, and this has allowed me to be a better friend, teammate, and leader. i think the biggest takeaway from what i’ve seen is that more people need to speak about what they are going through whether it be loneliness, mental health, relationships, or just your general well-being. people need to speak up because that is the only way you find out you aren’t alone in your struggles. finding my voice and speaking up has also allowed me to become a leader on my team. i’ve had the amazing opportunity to go to a few leadership development retreats this semester, that has really allowed me to step up on my tennis team. as palmer discusses, he said that “leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space in which human resourcefulness may be evoked.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” (parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal) – moreau fye week 11). trying to create an environment and culture on my team of safety and trust has been so important to me. the big theme of week ten was encountering brokenness. through listening of the art of kintsugi, we were told “there is beauty in brokenness” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto) moreau fye week 10). i’ve seen this in so many aspects, whether it be through my own personal experiences or watching my friends work through adverse situations. in the middle of experiencing that brokenness, it is so hard to see the light and see a way out of it. that feeling of not having a way out is something i experienced last semester and seen many of my friends dealing with this year. however, i’ve learned that embracing the struggle and embracing that brokenness is the best way to get through it. my coach this year told us so many times this year, “the only way is through”. this really resonated with me because if you learn to embrace the struggle, it often becomes easier to get through. also, knowing that you can push through adversity and things will get better is another thing that makes struggle easier to embrace. the biggest things i have learned this semester has been in the relationships i have, and the way that i approach adversity. in week twelve, we read about this in the reading by fr. james, where he said, “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105669 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105669 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105633 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105633 stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future…” (“hope holy cross and christian education” pages 14 16 (fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). this is pretty much the epitome of what i learned through my last two semesters here at notre dame. i think it’s so important to embrace struggle, even though in the moment it is so difficult. with the amount of adversity that was thrown at me all at once last semester, it was easy for me to complain, be upset, and get into an extremely negative state of mine. however, because of the struggles of last semester, i was able to grow into a better version of myself that i am today. additionally, i am able to be a better friend and companion to others because i can relate to the challenges that others might be going through. out of all of my friends from home, i was the only one to be able to attend university during covid, which presented numerous challenges. however, i remember that i was able to go to school and was in a lot better position to learn, grow and build friendships. this semester, i’ve learned to embrace struggle, even when it seems like the most difficult thing to do, because i truly believe that it will make me a better person and i will grow because of it. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105685 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105685 w moreau capstone integration mission statement i see life as an opportunity to help the people around you and bring them to a better satisfaction level of life. humans are created to be social creatures, so i believe that i have a human obligation to the people around me. everyone deserves love. you, as a person, should see the people that the world calls “outcast” and show them that there is really no such thing. i try to do this in my life whenever i can. in my high school, there was always this one boy that no one talked to. there was no particular reason for it, rather than they judged him for his baggy polos and greasy hair. i took my time to introduce myself and strike up a conversation. during talking to him, he was nothing but sweet and even a little funny. every day i would go to my class with him, i would chat with him, even when my classmates and even my boyfriend at the time would snicker about it. when the time came to go off to college after graduation, this boy texted me a long paragraph about how grateful he was that i would talk to him. he had a lot of family and mental health problems, so he was glad that he could escape from these things even in the five minutes we chatted each day. i have never once regretted talking to this boy; i treated him like a human being while others would talk behind his back, and it helped him through things happening in his life. you never know the circumstances of someone’s life, and it can help to do something as little as saying hi when walking into the classroom. my relationships in my life are very important to me. everyone deserves to have good, healthy relationships in their lives. no one should be completely alone or even have to feel that way. god says that everyone is supposed to love their neighbors, and if he gave me a heart with such a capability for love, why wouldn’t i use it to its fullest abilities? i help everyone and anyone that i am able to. when i got my first job at sixteen, i was ecstatic to start making my own money. when my first few paychecks came in, i quickly spent them on fun things just because i could. soon, i realized that the things i was spending all this money on were things that some people will never have the money to buy. i began to think about every purchase i made. was this new skirt that i was going to buy something that i really needed? is this second pair of sneakers really necessary when some people don’t even have a first? these self-reflecting questions led me to change. when i got my next paycheck after this, i went straight to the convenience store and bought bags full of toiletries and drove straight to the homeless shelter in my town. after dropping off these things, i had a smile on my face bigger than any skirt or sneakers could ever give me. i realized i had the ability to help the people around me, and i used this to spread love and give. as i have said that it is important to help people around me, i also see it as important to remember that i am a person as well and to focus on activities that will better me morally and in worldly ways. this means that i want to grow in ways that are physical, like working towards successful work place achievements, but also in an emotional and mental way. i want to find my own happiness, and not have to rely wholly on anyone else for that. though it is important to have others that you can rely on, you have to realize that no one can love the people around them without loving themselves first. i have learned these things the hard way in life. before this second semester of my freshman year, i had not really been outside of a relationship since i was in eighth grade. this obviously shaped the kind of person i was. always having a boyfriend, especially during such formative years of my life, i had began to fully rely on another person for my own happiness. when i got out of a relationship a few months ago, i realized how big of a problem this was. i realized that i needed to change this or risk never being fully happy with myself ever in my life. so, the last few months i have dedicated to bettering me, for me. i have decided that i am taking measures for my own growth and becoming a better person for this. even though this belief is a fairly new addition to my mission statement, i believe it is just as important as any other part. whatever way my life ends up going, i want to be able to make myself happy with what i have and use that happiness to infect the people around me. i want to leave the world better than i found it, and i want to help the people around me to do the same. saying this, i believe that nothing is ever truly set in stone. my mission statement and what i hold most important may reshape throughout life as i learn and grow. all of life is a learning experience. you never actually leave the classroom when you graduate; it just gets a lot bigger. i may have left this moreau classroom for the last time on monday, but i will use the things i learned in it to guide me through the rest of my life. i know this is your last time teaching a moreau class, and i am grateful for the things you have shared with me. i hope that you too can grow as a person and adapt your mission statement, as no one’s is ever perfect. thank you for helping me form mine into what i have and helping form me in to who i am today. integration two encountering horizons: growing in mind, spirit, and community i would separate three different learning or growing experiences from my short time so far at notre dame: finding difficulty in knowing what i want to study where i thought i was certain before, finding more strength in my faith where i was not so certain in before, and learning from the experiences of others around me from such a variety of backgrounds. when coming to notre dame, i was quite certain in what i wanted to study: engineering, specifically aerospace or mechanical engineering. from a young age, i had always been interested in science — especially physics — and math and the natural progression to those affinities from what i heard from family and friends was engineering. i never doubted it and even took some engineering classes in high school, enjoying them a lot. however, when looking at our major discernment assignment — an assignment where we figure out what major in the engineering school we would like to continue to pursue — for engineering class, i looked at my hobbies and interests outside of the classroom. what i found was that many of my hobbies were geared towards computer science. i had always been interested in computer science but strayed away as at a young age, i took robotics classes and did not like them. as a result, my parents and others close to me assumed i didn’t like programming and computer science and i let them believe that. unfortunately, i am not one to actively alter someone’s idea of me: if someone thinks something of me, i let them and don’t actively try to change their mind. i found the julia hogan article in week 9 to be helpful as she stated that “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i took this and saw that other’s expectations of me — not necessarily expectations of performance but expectations of hobbies and interests — were holding me back from doing what i possibly would want to do in the future. as a result, i brought up the idea to my parents and am currently still deciding what i would like to study. i will probably take a semester or two to decide between the two majors as the curriculums are similar and i would like to take some classes to help decide. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau the second growing experience at notre dame that i’ve had is my growth in faith. before college, i had always gone to church with my family but did it in a slightly haphazard way, never taking my faith too seriously. in fact, coming into notre dame, i did not expect myself to attend church at all while here. however, while attending some early masses and through my theology and moreau classes, i found a community in attending mass and have attended most weeks while being at notre dame. i have also made an effort to think more seriously about my faith and not just go through the motions because my parents tell me to go to mass and pray. i found a quote from “holy cross and christian education” especially true through my search for faith at notre dame: “the charism of education in the faith that the holy spirit entrusted to the congregation of holy cross through blessed basil moreau … encourages believers to embrace the cross of jesus while progressing through this world toward the light of god’s kingdom” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). i definitely saw this encouragement towards god and jesus at notre dame and intend to continue to search for faith throughout my time at notre dame and beyond. finally, while at notre dame so far, i have met and connected with people from a variety of backgrounds, many more that i had the opportunity to connect with before. in high school and before, i had mostly only met people of similar backgrounds to myself, whether it be faith, cultural, or others. it was not necessarily intentional that i did not interact with many others different from myself, it just seemed to happen like this. however, this seemingly unintentional phenomenon could have been unconsciously created as described in fr. jenkins’ address where he stated that, “we are like actors following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). although i agree with him that we create groups and factions based on our beliefs, i have not seen too much of the hostility he spoke of in my experiences of those different from myself and who would belong to different “factions”. instead, at notre dame especially, i have seen people search for common goals even where there was disagreement, and never outwardly insulting others or creating hostility. i think this connects well with the “thirteen ways of looking for community”, where it was https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ stated that “the most common connotation of the word “community” in our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap” (“thirteen ways of looking for community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i think sometimes people group up unconsciously with those like themselves to create communities so tight knit and exclusive because they think everyone in their community has to be “intimate” with them and just like them. one does not have to always agree, and thus become “intimate” with those different to us, however one must respect and search for some sort of discussion with those different to us to create a healthy and diverse community. as a result, i would like to continue to search to connect with those different from myself at notre dame, whether it be religion, political views, culture, race, or anything else that makes someone else different from myself. i think that we have a lot to learn from our brothers and sisters that are different from us and have seen that through a short amount of time at notre dame so far, leading me to want to continue this search for connection with others as i can see how much i can learn in the coming years by continuing on with this search. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ integration one over the past few weeks, moreau has taught me more about myself and how to become the best version of myself during my time at notre dame. from the stems of the independent thinking lessons all the way to finding my truth, i have a good sense of the direction i am headed spiritually and socially. critical and independent thinking is one of the very first topics we covered in moreau. it is a virtue that will help me shape not only my time here at notre dame but for my entire life. in many of my responses, i chose to connect our lesson to one of the things that is most important to me, baseball. being a baseball player, many coaches try to teach their way as a single route to becoming a better athlete. over time i have encountered coaches that like to let me explore and find my own success. this is where independent thinking steps in. not only will i have to learn what works for me, but continue to hold true to myself and what makes me a better player. i can also take these values into my academic habits which will contribute to my success long term. independent thinking is what will make me stand out among my classmates. if every single student at notre dame was admitted under the exact criteria, i believe there would be a lack of culture. being critical of my own work, thoughts, and beliefs will help push me to become a better version of myself each and every day. not only will professors be critical of my classwork, but i will be too. i strive to look at myself in the mirror at the end of every day and say i have made all the right efforts to prepare myself for the next day. next, we looked at the struggles in life, school, and for me baseball. i have a better sense now of how to deal with and grow from anything i fail at or consider “hard”. as we transitioned, one of the most valuable thighs that has helped not only me, but my classmates as well is vulnerability. in my eyes, vulnerability and discomfort go hand in hand. learning that it’s ok to be uncomfortable is what will make me successful. i do not want or anticipate these next few years to be a comfortable/smooth ride. i want to face challenges and learn how to overcome them. feeling like i belong here at notre dame has been something that i have struggled with in the past. i did not get in for my good grades, impressive resume, i felt i only got in because of baseball. as i spent my first couple months here, i feel the community that i was meant to be a part of. at the end of the day, everyone here is wanting to prove something to themselves and make a difference in the world. being able to take care of my academic success as well as an athletic career will help prove to myself that i belong at this prestigious university. everything in the first two weeks of moreau revolved around one word in my eyes, “growth”. growth, whether spiritually, socially, athletically, or academically is something that is never-ending. even if the execution is not present, i know that as long as i put the effort and intent into everything i do i will achieve my goals. we grow every day, more than we think. ranging from a newborn baby to an 80-year-old man, humans grow and evolve as we always have. how we go about this is a big key to our success and happiness in our lives. one of the biggest beliefs in shaping my personality is being authentic with myself and others. being authentic, in my opinion, takes 0 effort. if a person has a core set of beliefs and values, they should do whatever they feel is best. that to me is being authentic, not changing your personality for anyone. now, after watching and analyzing a ted talk by david brooks, i have a clearer sense of which “adam” i see myself as currently, and which one i would rather be. in the ted talk, david brooks introduces the resume and the eulogy virtues. resume virtues are used for your resume, whereas eulogy virtues go more in-depth. eulogy resumes are typically used in the marketplace, this offers a characteristic guide for your personality and tendencies. brooks references the book “the lonely man of faith” in 1965, this novel talks about the two sides of nature, adam i and adam ii. adam i is ambitious and seen as an external side of nature. his goal is to build and create industries. whereas adam ii is the more reserved type of nature, he wants to live internally sound. in a way that abides by god's creations and practices. adam i is more materialistic, savoring accomplishments and rewarding acts. whereas adam ii is more focused on consistency. adam i is interested in how things operate, adam ii asks the more challenging question “why are we here”. both adam’s are capable of leading a successful life. who will be more successful? who will be happier? these to me are two separate topics. success may lead to gratification, but not concrete happiness. being internally sound, in my eyes, is what creates happiness. one of the last, and most valuable things i took away from these first couple of months was my understanding of my own faith and how it ties into the people and community i surround and embrace. faith gives us all something to believe in, to hold true and close to ourselves. faith, in my life, serves as a guide and principle in how i live my life. everyone screws up, it's human, but in any faith, there is a belief in doing the “right” thing. this is different for each faith and specific for each being. after hearing the famous fr. pete speak, giving examples of tying his shoes, and relating back to the grand scheme of faith, i have a clear sense of what i believe in for myself when it comes to faith. in the qqc we used the term “life-giving relationships”, which to me resembles the relationships that will help me grow as a person. life-giving relationships are rare in my opinion. i have always tried to surround myself with people with who i can learn, and grow as a person. whether it's family, friends, girlfriend i feel i have done a good job so far at keeping my circle “tight”. i learn from these people all the time, and although some relationships may have their speed bumps, i know that the people surrounded by me want to see me reach my maximum potential in my life, as i do for them. it's like one big support system that keeps on growing! in conclusion, i feel i have learned more about myself in this class than at any other point in my life, it is exciting to see the direction i am headed as i am optimistic about my future here at notre dame. i look forward to continuing this journey with the people i hold close to me. strength trust growth “the main focus is myself and the goals that i want to achieve, not the expectations from others”. after fall break, i felt like i have been recharged, since i had one week to get away from work, stress from exams, and everyone, truly focus on myself, and living at a slower pace. i realized that as i move into college life, personal growth is one of my top priorities. i particularly like the quote from “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, lcpc moreau fye week 9, “ “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” this quote is like a reminder to me that sometimes meeting other people’s expectations is needed in order to create a good reputation for myself, yet it is completely fine to not follow them. people can always make mistakes, even something as perfect as a machine can malfunction sometimes. it is important to know how to select expectations that are achievable and make me feel comfortable achieving them, or else, just like the quote says i would live the life of others. normally i would describe myself as someone who is very calm and always thinks positively, but at certain moments, i also have self-doubts. one example of this is during the college application process, when i knew that i got accepted into notre dame, i was very excited yet at the same time asking myself how did i get into here, did i deserve that opportunity to get in, what if i perform poorly, then i would disappoint my parents. one of the most important things that help me overcome this anxiety is realizing that everyone is on the same boat, and after i have an open conversation about this with my roommate, i felt a lot better since i could get everything out of my chest and share it with someone who is trustworthy. in addition, i would also describe myself as somewhat a perfectionist. i used to set very high goals for myself without realizing that i am treating myself too strictly. this is not very healthy since if i could not achieve my goal i would consider myself as a failure. over time, i learned a valuable lesson that it is better to set achievable goals than setting big goals and feel pressured to achieve them. that mindset helps me a lot whenever i am facing tough situations like huge exams at school. it also helps me to focus on myself more and gain self confidence. in my perspective, it is okay to let go of other’s expectations, but at the same time self-expectation should always be kept since people should work with a certain goal in mind. “it is completely normal to have brokenness, how i get over with them is more important.” from the video “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” from grotto network moreau fye week 10, i understand that no matter how good i can hide away my emotions, there will always be a moment when i find myself at a very low point. it is ordinary for people and me to experience different emotions at various times. i believe that even though brokenness can give me negative feelings which may take a long time to forget about, yet i should view it with positivity as thinking negatively for a long time is detrimental to both my physical and mental health. i find the video from this module very intersting as people use art to face pain and brokenness. breaking an object like a mug or a plate is like directly facing people’s pain, since it is not easy to destroy an object all of a sudden. after that, people in the workshop connect all of the broken pieces together, as if they are trying to overcome their pains or looking at it with a more positive energy. the action of people trying to break the objects is like releasing all of their sadness, disappointments out of their chest, and when they remake the object, their pain will go away since they have transformed them into something different. the broken pieces no longer carry that sadness. it truly depends on different people and how they perceive pain when it comes to how easy it is to get over brokenness. to me, whenever i have any sadness, i always try to look at the positive side of it, and slowly work from there,and overtime, my pain would go away. sometimes it is not easy to keep that happy attitude, and in that case i believe that time can heal my pain. after discovering about kintsugi, i would do some more research on this and may attend a workshop on this someday. for instance, one brokenness that i face in notre dame is when i did not do well in my accounting exams despite how much effort i have put in to study for them. the results were not so great, but i tried to calm myself down by looking at what i did well and them slowly figure out which areas that i need to improve on. “i understand that sometimes i have to cope with the situation when i have a conflct with someone rather than avoid it”. extracting a quote from “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmermoreau fye week 11: “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as “enemy.””. as i become more mature, since i have more experience interacting with people from all walks of life, i realize that not everyone has good personalities, and not everyone is willing to treat me nicely. there is no reason to be let down by those people since i know that i am treating people fairly, and there is always someone out there who always supports me. in addition, i am part of a community, which means that i should support and offer help to others no matter how much i do not like them. my “enemy” would never disappear from my community, so the way to face this is to live along with them, and remain a distance towards them. the community in notre dame is not an exception. not everyone is kind and warm-hearted. i do have my own conflicts with several people, yet i choose not to avoid them since there is no point doing so, we exist in the same community, so it is not like we would never see each other again. the best way to face this situation is to move forward and act neutral towards them, and i know for a fact that i can always be friends with other people. “i should not loose hope even when i am in tough situations” “it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift.” “holy cross and christian education” from campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week 12. in my opinion, this quote implies that people should try to keep on thinking about positive things whenever they are going through difficult times in order to overcome them easier. from the text “hopeholy cross and christian education”, during its foundation, the congregation faced many hardships. however, father moreau always encouraged the community to see the hand of divine providence, believing that the lord’s choicest blessings come through the crosses we bear out of love for him and love for others. he has hope in the lord's choices, and that is what brings people out of tough times. it is very important to maintain hope in our lives, since hope is a part of what we believe in. people may exist in the same community, but they pursue different beliefs. i particularly find pursuing hope is very important especially whenever i’m in a bad situation. having hopes helps me get out of those situations and have something to look forward to over the next day. having hope also helps me to figure out what i truly want and set goals for myself to achieve easier. in a way, having hope links my past and present to the future. i have a vision for what i hope will happen. whether it does not, just envisioning it can make me feel better. every time i have a bad day from college, i always say to myself that tomorrow is going to be a better day, and just in a few more months, i can come back home and reunite with my family. in these past few weeks, i have a chance to understand about myself deeper, exploring different sides of me in a much deeper angle. up until now, i still learn new things everyday, and i am grateful to take part in this course. moreau integration one realizing my beliefs at notre dame before coming to notre dame, i didn’t know what to expect. i knew that notre dame has an amazing business program in mendoza. i knew that the residence hall systems are unique and unlike any other. i knew that we have the best (go irish!) football teams in the nation. because i never got to step foot on campus until i did for the first time during welcome weekend, all these things i knew simply from watching videos made by students on youtube, from listening to admissions officers talking about the school, from watching the fighting irish on tv and from scrolling through the university of notre dame website. since i took a gap year i was wondering what it would actually be like to be a notre dame student for more than a year. and so far, it has been a very good experience. being here has helped me discover more about myself and has allowed me to become a more independent and better person. i believe that i am searching for my place on campus and in the world and for strong, life-long friendships. “they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i believe that in order to find these strong life-long friendships, i must be open to other people and willing to be vulnerable. i have to be willing to step out of my comfort zone and embrace what makes me unique because it is what makes me who i am. the quote, “believe that we’re enough” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) also struck me as we have to accept who we are instead of trying to change ourselves and be someone we are not in order to please others. i believe that throughout my short time here so far, i have already good friends who i spend time together with and enjoy my company. we even motivate each other to be better people by studying together and encouraging each other to study more, or in the gym we push each other to become stronger. i am even traveling with one of my new friends during the fall break to chicago and new york. i believe that throughout my time here i will make even more new friends and hopefully influence them to become better people. i believe that in order to grow and realize my full potential as well as becoming my most authentic self, i must recognize the sin within myself so that we can combat it. “revisit the past, find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, and you fight that sin and wrestle that sin and out of that wrestling then a depth of character (adam ii) is constructed.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) this quote is relevant here because it talks about how we as humans struggle to become better people. becoming better people is not instantaneous--instead, it is a process. it also explores how we must acknowledge our mistakes and learn from them instead of just sulking. i know i have made mistakes before, i have made many mistakes already since coming here. for instance, i slept too late and was having a hard time paying attention in class. which led me to realize that even though my classes here (earliest is 9:25am) start much earlier than they did in high school (earliest is 7:30am), i should still sleep early because the workload here is much heavier than in high school. as such i can now become a better student and a better person because i recognized this mistake and am making an effort to change it. earlier in brooks’ talk, he referred to soloveitchik’s book, "the lonely man of faith" particularly that soloveitchik https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim thought that there were two sides to human nature, adam i being focused more on the worldly, materialistic success and adam ii focusing on not just doing good but being good, honoring god and his creation. in modern society, adam i is what is often being focused on given that the media is very focused on this idea of success in life being measured by money. however, i believe that money is not the only aspect of life that we should focus on, we should focus on our adam ii and be good people as this will allow us to live more balanced lives. “the greatest journey you will ever go on, is one of self-discovery.” (the role of faith in our story, fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three) in this quote, fr. pete explains that we must be the people that god made us to be and be authentic to ourselves. furthermore, we cannot expect to understand ourselves fully without making an effort to. we must find ways to figure out who we really are such as through reflection and also through prayer. like what fagerberg says, “faith, hope, and love adjust the lighting of our life so that we look beyond ourselves to see god.” (“faith brings light to a dark world”, david fagerberg moreau fye week three) as such we must use faith, hope, and love to look at life in a better way. we must be selfless and not just care about ourselves but also about god’s creation. i believe that to forge life giving relationships we must treat others with respect. “know relationship abuse so you can stop it.” (“because i love you, double whiskey” moreau fye week four) oftentimes, i think that people are in denial of the situations that they are currently in, be it romantic relationships, friendships, coworkers or any other forms of relationships. it can be difficult to grasp the idea that you are currently in a toxic environment as it seems like a situation that we never expect for ourselves. but, it does happen and i think that the way you can realize that is by sometimes taking a step back and just examining your situation. at the same time, when you notice that someone is in a toxic relationship it is important to not just let it be. i believe that my community should have active bystanders who make an effort to prevent and stop bad things from happening. the 3ds to “direct, delegate, discharge” (“it’s on us nd the three d’s of being an active bystander”moreau fye week four) summarize this really well, that we must do our best to prevent these things from happening. i believe that sometimes i must sometimes take risks in order to succeed. without risks, i believe that i will not be able to reach my true potential. i have to be okay with the possibility of failing sometimes because if not i will just stay in my comfort zone instead of getting uncomfortable but improving my skills and myself. “it's really not there because what's the worst that can happen if you take a risk and it doesn't work out? so you fail--but know this failure always brings you a gift and that gift is called experience. now you know how to do it better, now you know how to do it differently, now you know how to do it successfully.” (“2021 laetare medalist address”, carla harris moreau fye week five) i have applied to many different sibc projects and for opportunities which i have not been accepted to, however, through applying to these things i was able to learn some skills such as making better powerpoint presentations so that in the future i will be able to get accepted into these projects. i also believe that my community should be a very accepting environment. coming from the philippines, which has a very different culture and population from this university, i experienced a little bit of a culture shock the moment i arrived here. given the culture differences, there was https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 some form of implicit bias that i had. “this tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” (“how to think about 'implicit bias’”, keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week seven) i believe that if we acknowledge our implicit biases, we will be able to think more objectively about other people and be open to making more friends. we will also become more accepting of other people for who they are rather than judging them for who we think they are. “so that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become.” (“danger of a single story”, chimanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week seven) as such, i believe we must expose ourselves to as much diverse media as possible so that we do not just have a limited view of how people are. the week 6 people that i wrote helped me to really reflect about my beliefs and how they were affected by my upbringing. “but where i am from is more than just a pin on a map. i come from a family of achievers, a family that i am very proud to be a part of. my lolo (tagalog for grandpa) is a filipino senator who converted a us naval base into the country’s first freeport. my grandfather was a first generation american, who pioneered research of endoscopy and saved hundreds as a gastroenterologist. my father, who grew up in the us, and came back to the philippines, to help build the developing nation of his parents. i, too, am determined to make my mark and be like those who came before me in my own special way.” (“where i’m from”, nicholas paragas moreau fye week six). i believe that by striving to be great like my family was and is, i will be able to make a difference in the world in my own way. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration one assignment living my notre dame dream throughout my time at the university of notre dame so far, as well as my time as a student in moreau, i’ve found that as i have begun a deep dive into attempting to uncover my core beliefs and values, i’ve developed a better understanding of myself and others around me. from writing about what i’m searching for and why, to writing about how i believe i can best achieve self growth, i’ve felt as though i have grown in multiple different aspects of my life, including as a student, friend, and proud notre dame community member. i believe that my search for self identity requires me to challenge myself both in action and thought, while at the same time challenging myself to express these thoughts and actions to others. by actions, i refer more to how i present myself to others. in the process of discovering what i’m searching for and as i work to better understand myself, it is paramount that i be vulnerable around others, even in uncomfortable situations, while also maintaining courage and confidence in myself. these same ideas were referenced by dr. brown, as she described how as we begin to express these emotions that may often be difficult to show, that we can see the most self-growth. she also made the key point that while not always easy, “vulnerability isn’t necessarily a sad thing, but instead a quality that should be embraced and put into practice.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one) i find this distinction to be crucial because i’ve found that as i try to better express my vulnerability, that i must view it as an opportunity to grow, rather than something sad. i believe that i can become my most authentic self by focusing on being the most authentic version of myself. this week two tedtalk highlighted the difference between the questions of how we can become the most successful versus how we can become our most authentic selves. this first question was atom one, and the second was atom two. my favorite quote from the talk highlighted the difference between the two. it stated that, “atom one’s motto is success. atom two’s motto is love, redemption, and return.” (“should you live for your resume ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) since then i have worked to put this idea into practice. i think for me as a college student at an extremely competitive university it is crucial to keep this in mind. focusing on building real, loving relationships with my peers, instead of thinking simply about my own success, i believe, will have a drastic effect on my notre dame experience. throughout my life, i have tried to grow to be as authentic as possible. yet, during my time in high school and during the college application process i, at times, felt my drive for authenticity became lost in my attempts to get the best grades and test scores in order to get into the best schools i could. while none of those were necessarily bad things, they have opened my eyes and have shown me that the search for authenticity does indeed yield the most rewarding results, and in the process allows me to feel more full and enlightened. i believe that faith informs the way i see the world in a variety of ways. i also found father pete’s message to be extremely impactful, as he stated that “... a community that seeks on its best days to be a family and endure with the hope and pain that we can at times cause one another.” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three) to me, i view this as representing the importance of developing both the mind and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry heart. i believe that this means developing my relationships with others, while also improving my relationship with myself in my search for self discovery. i’ve found that during these first few weeks at notre dame that nearly everyone i have met has been so kind and genuine. as a result, i have challenged myself to spread this same kindness and love to others. in this challenge, i feel i have begun to understand myself better and also strengthened the bonds and connections that i have with the incredible people around me. i believe that i can forge live-giving relationships by presenting the most authentic version of myself to everyone around me. this ties into the other ideas i have already discussed, relating to how i’ve attempted to be more vulnerable, as well as more authentic throughout my time at notre dame. i also believe that this idea takes on an even more important role when relating to relationships and love in the form of a girlfriend or boyfriend. these relationships then take on a different meaning, yet the core values remain the same. i’ve found that whether someone is just a friend, or, for me, a girlfriend, that the importance of vulnerability and courage, two qualities that are crucial in self-identity, remain paramount. the reading stated that one major red flag in a relationship is when “one partner feels that he/she can’t live without the other.” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four) to me, this represents the idea of individuality, as i believe that while a relationship should allow me to become extremely close with another person, they should never allow me to feel as though i myself cannot remain independent, or that my own qualities and being is not enough. i believe that stories and my experiences play a huge role in shaping my journey. the week 5 qqc allowed me to take a step back and look at the bigger picture of how my experience has been thus far and gave me insight into how i can work to improve future experiences as well. i grew up as part of the notre dame family. my dad, uncle, and aunt went here, and now my brother and i are both currently students here. my entire life has seemingly been surrounded by notre dame and while this has been amazing, i’ve found that now here as a student i’ve put a lot of pressure on myself to do well. i believe, however, that as i’ve settled in and continued my pursuit of self discovery that a lot of this pressure has been relieved. i now know that i do belong here, and that the notre dame community is home. as the your holy cross education video stated, “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) hearing these words allowed me to take a step back and focus on the bigger picture ideas of what the university of notre dame can give to me, and how i can best utilize my time at this extraordinary institution. i believe and have found that this starts with me simply being myself, striving to make connections with all the beautiful people around me. i believe that reflecting on experiences and encounters and how they’ve shaped me into who i have today is crucial in my development of both my current and future self. i’m from a loving home, family dinners, sporting events, and loyal and caring friends. all of these things mean the world to me and i think that as i expand upon them during my time at notre dame, i can continue to define who i am now and who i will continue to become. i want to expand upon https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 this group of loyal friends, building a new family in a sense here at notre dame. of course, keeping my family at home as a priority, but also finding people who i can love in a similar way to support one another while we’re away from our homes. this relates to my favorite quote from our reading of the where i’m from poem that states “i want to know when you get to be from a place that doesn't have roots like trees.” ("where i'm from", by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) while all students here at notre dame come from different homes originally where they live with their families, i’ve come to realize home in a sense is less physical, but more my own perception of where i feel the most belonging and love. i can proudly say that notre dame is now a new home for me. i believe that i pursue truth by removing any prior bias or judgement of others before our interactions. in doing so, i can be so much more open-minded, allowing for my interactions to be more authentic and far less limited. while at first i wasn’t sure exactly what it was, the reading defined implicit bias as follows: “(a) tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” (“how to think about 'implicit bias',” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven) as i have begun my notre dame journey, i have strived to meet as many people as possible, attempting to form new connections and build relationships with others. in this process, i’ve found that i’ve met so many different types of people from such a wide variety of backgrounds. as such, i’ve attempted to go into all of these different interactions without bias, in order to allow every conversation and encounter i have to reach their full potential. overall, i believe in kindness, courage, and compassion. i believe that without all three of these components, i will never be able to reach my fullest potential, and that i, as a notre dame student, will never be able to get the most out of the incredible opportunities that this great university has to offer. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ journey to happiness i believe that i am searching for happiness and fulfillment in life. i believe that graduating from the university of notre dame and finding success in life with a good job and a family would make me happy. part of finding happiness is also finding belonging and courage. as dr. brown in the first qqc mentions, “lean into the discomfort of the work.” i’m not a fan of doing uncomfortable things but i realize that i need to find the courage to lean into it and find belonging in a community. faith also plays an important role in my life because i can’t just live life without believing in anything. the week 3 qqc mentions “hope directs our desire toward its true end” and i believe that it can help me cope with stress and find happiness in life while motivating positive actions. faith led me to attend the university of notre dame and i hold out hope that i graduate from here being the best version of myself. i am happy to say that i love being part of the notre dame community, that i am happy here, and following this path of faith has led me to that. i believe that i forge life giving relationships by growing our “adam 2” personalities as mentioned in the week 2 qqc. “having hope, faith, and love will develop our “adam 2” personality.” building this character of self and remembering the precious moments in life will allow me to build relationships because people will generally respect me when i have moral values in life. it is also important for me to realize what kind of relationship that i would be in. the red flag campaign from the week 4 qqc about forging relationships has allowed me to identify whether i was in a healthy or unhealthy relationship as well help me “trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence in a relationship. this could help me a lot because i too face trust issues frequently. the red flag campaign has opened my eyes as it helps me understand what a healthy relationship feels like. i believe that i grow as a person by pursuing the truth in life as well as acknowledging my own faults and biases. as we seek the truth, i can grow because there are more things that i know about life in general. not knowing the truth or being in denial will help me because that would just be avoiding reality. and as chimamanda ngozi adichie said, she received a stereotype from her roommate in the united states even though they have never met. i, myself, have had biases and stereotypes against other people and the sooner that i acknowledge these faults, the sooner i can be free of these stereotypes, further helping me develop as a person. as i learn the truth that i too, also receive biases from certain people, i also grow by seeking out why they have these biases/stereotypes and i can help them clarify anything they need to know about me. i believe that i am responsible for building life-long memories and stories. it may seem irrelevant right now as most people go to college to focus solely on their academics, however, college is not only for academics. it is about forming stories when we “learn family by sharing a room, taking care of a place together.” week 5 qqc discusses how stories shape our journey and being part of the notre dame community as well as baumer hall as made me feel like part of a family and i believe that i will form all kinds of stories with the people here, watching the two notre dames and listening to carla ann harris, i realized notre dame will help me become a kind and helpful person that cares for and respects for others and i feel that this is my responsibility towards my family who have flown me thousand of miles away to get a good education and become an upstanding citizen. i believe that my community should learn about each other’s stories and how they became the person they are today. i feel that if more people share their morals, values, and interests openly, it will help them to find long-lasting relationships and other people will also care more about you as a person.tracing the roots of how we came to be the way we are can deepen our understanding of what is important to our quality of life and whether it is perceived as eroding or improving. as a class, we discussed that most of our peers have parents as their main influences and i feel that by knowing that information, i am closer to them. as a community, we share that quality of life together and if we want to improve, it is pertinent that i know my roommates and other dorm mates’ stories to make sure that our quality of living here at notre dame continues on improving till the day we graduate. i believe that i am made to make my family proud by studying hard here at notre dame, have a nice social life filled with long-lasting relationships, and become a successful and kind-hearted person in the future.father pete also mentioned that “leaving your family and friends to be here at notre dame allowed us to form new relationships with the people around us.” i believe getting good grades at notre dame requires help from others and interacting with classmates. this way, i am searching for belonging as we form a community once we study and spend time together. as for becoming a kind-hearted person, i rely on faith and hope that as time passes by, i will become a better person that will help people in need. the text by professor david fagerberg mentions “hope directs our desire toward its true end” and if i just keep on thinking positively and believing in hope and myself, i will become the person who i desire and who i plan to become. eppler 1 gracie’s gospel truths notre dame has always been my dream. i have worked tirelessly and doggedly in order to get here, and although my experience has been incredible so far, being here has already challenged my beliefs and caused me to question my sense of self. as i reflected on everything we have learned in moreau and everything i know about myself, i came to three root beliefs, or “gospel truths”: i believe that i am more than my first impression, that my purpose is to spread goodness, and that i am searching for true joy and peace. i analyzed who i am in other people’s eyes, who i know myself to be, and who i want to be in the future. at notre dame, i want to keep these core beliefs at the forefront of my mind in order to become the best version of myself. i believe that i am so much more than my first impression. my ancestry, heritage, family, hometown, friends, and activities have all come together to shape the person that i am today. as chimamanda ngozi adiche said, we are more than just a “single-story”—we are a collection of ideals, thoughts, and inspirations. adichie notes that “many stories matter,” emphasizing the importance of looking past the first impression that we have of people and instead working to understand each person as a well-rounded, diverse hodgepodge of beliefs (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adiche – moreau fye week seven). i am often concerned with how other people view me and what their first impression of me is. so often i am faced with the same questions and assumptions about who i am and what i am involved in. i often find myself drifting down this path as well, judging people before i truly know who they are and what they stand for. i need to remember that people are more than just the “single-story” i categorize them as, and i hope that in turn they will see me as such as well. i am more than just a notre dame student—i am a writer, a dancer, a pianist, a sister, a soccer https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story eppler 2 player, a fleetwood mac fan, a christian, a mushroom-hater, and a lover of all things pink. although i don’t expect people to be able to know everything about me from our initial connection, i hope to share more about myself, who i am, and where i am from with every encounter, perhaps giving them a glimpse as to “where i’m from” and a hint of what i featured in my poem that we discussed in week six (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon– moreau fye week six). i believe we are more than just our looks, our clothes, or our race. we are so much more than the impressions we give initially. here at notre dame, it is very easy to stereotype the people we meet, and just as easily to be stereotyped ourselves. as i reflected on how other people view me, i noticed how i’ve had a number of people attempt to “guess” my ethnicity. this is often annoying and frustrating, as although i know that people are curious, it is not their place to impose themselves in this way. i hope to work on changing the culture here at notre dame and taking the curiosity that all students have and working that into a culture focused on acceptance. this culture can be fostered through making friends with people of all races, sexual orientations, and nationalities, which i am striving to do, as well as attempting to have open dialogues about differences. at notre dame, i have joined the faso filipino club in order to bond with people who share my background and have found a great sense of community and solidarity there. i have also joined “circle k” volunteer club in order to combat my implicit biases and my own privilege. i hope that by taking similar steps, notre dame students will be more willing to look past their first impressions and “single-stories” of the people they meet and work towards knowing their peers on a deep, true level. i believe that my purpose is to spread goodness. it is not enough to be good, we must share this goodness so that it bleeds into everything we do. from a young age, i have always had http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html eppler 3 a strong moral compass. my parents instilled in me a desire to be good and to always want to be a model for others. however, this often came with a sense of moral anxiety, as i always knew that i was being analyzed. often times this could affect my self-confidence. as we discussed in week one, our sense of belonging is directly connected to our confidence in ourselves (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). we feel like we belong to a space when we truly recognize that we fit in. since my identity in grade school and middle school was categorized as being “good,” i feel the most sense of belonging when i was surrounded by good people as well. i also think this sense of belonging and this ability to share our true personality comes through self-discovery. when we analyzed our character strengths in week two, i was not surprised to discover that my top strength was “love,” as i know that i am very emotional and share these emotions with my friends and family (“via character strengths survey” moreau fye week two). i am not afraid to express my reliance on a person, and in turn i expect them to treat me with the level of importance that i treat them. in this way, i strive to share my goodness, love, and vulnerability with the people around me. knowing my strengths (of morality and empathy), i must use them responsibly and effectively to help those around me. in middle school and high school, i am proud to say that i found people that supported me and encouraged me to be better than i was before. this allowed me to have a secure sense of belonging. these friends were always optimistic, attentive, loyal, and supportive, which are all qualities of good friends as we discussed in week four (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). however, i am still struggling to find a sense of belonging, to find friends that i know will support me, and to find an environment surrounded by “goodness” here at notre dame. although i know that it comes with time, i have yet to find the people that i truly feel comfortable and confident around. since i am still in the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/surveys/finished/19981461 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/surveys/finished/19981461 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104976 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104976 eppler 4 process of finding my safe space, i find it harder to share my true personality, goodness, and love. sometimes i compromise what i know is truly morally right and good in order to appear more popular or funny. i think that i will be able to share my morals more easily once i am more accustomed to my surroundings and once i have found people i trust and that will support my beliefs. i am especially excited to become better friends with people through the clubs i have joined as i know they share my interests and morals. some of the people i like hanging out with best i have met through the observer, transpose dance company, and the futsol club. i hope to foster these relationships so that i can truly belong. by sharing my values, i know that i have (goodness and love), i can ensure that i will find belonging here at notre dame. i believe that i am searching for true peace and joy. i think that it is easy to get caught up in the present and what we desire in the moment. however, overall, i think that we all desire a sense of lasting joy and peace. joy to me is much deeper than happiness, which can be fleeting; joy will stay no matter the situation, underlying every other feeling. as i continue to battle my anxiety, i constantly search for a sense of true peace. i have struggled my whole life to “find” where this sense of joy and peace will come from. but, i am slowly learning that joy and peace are not something we “find”—they are something we forge ourselves through introspection. as father pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery,” emphasizing the importance of meditation and self reflection (“the role of faith in our story” by pete mccormick moreau fye week three). when we focus on ourselves, what we desire, and our relationship with god, only then can we begin to see the world around us in a different perspective. a true relationship with our faith and ourselves can not only make us kinder and healthier, but can help us see the world in a brighter view, helping to make us less worried and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois eppler 5 more joyous. by reflecting on who we are, we can share the best version of ourselves with the world. in this way, i think that we don’t necessarily “find’ true peace and joy, we forge these virtues for ourselves. this comes not just through introspection, but also through perspective. i have struggled with anxiety my whole life, especially through high school when the pressure of grades and expectations overwhelmed me. as i noted in my week five reflection, i battled with a fear of failure. this led to a lack of peace and joy in my life. however, with a little perspective, i am slowly learning to realize that failure is an experience, and that i can “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson” (“notre dame commencement 2021” by carla harris moreau fye week five). this will allow me to be more satisfied with my life. even though i am not altering a huge part of my life, by gaining a new perspective and seeing my failures as lessons instead of setbacks, i can open myself up to a greater satisfaction in life. at notre dame, i want to make my mental health a priority. in high school, i often placed my mental state second to my grades and social life. this led me to fatigue and unhappiness. drawing from my high school experiences, i want to keep my mental health at the forefront of my life, especially by seeking counseling here and participating in activities such as yoga or playing piano in the chapel. i have learned that i won’t just stumble upon true, lasting joy and peace one day. these are virtues that i must work for by analyzing myself and the world around me in a new perspective. i must be open to change and to sharing this change with others. here, at notre dame, i need to remember who i am and to never be afraid of letting my true personality show. as i search for belonging, the more i trust in myself, the more joyous and peace-filled i will be. as i reflected on who i am in other people’s eyes, who i know myself to be, and who i want to be in the future, i came to realize that i have a strong sense of self, but that i need to let https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&feature=youtu.be eppler 6 this self-confidence guide me. at notre dame, i do not want to change myself. instead, i want to become a more truer version of myself—one that i am proud of and that shares her values with everyone. by keeping these “gospel truths” in mind, i know that i will never be led astray. moreau integration 1 moreau integration 1 15 october 2021 notre dame as a part of my journey 1. i believe that i pursue truth by being vulnerable. being vulnerable was never a struggle for me like it was for dr. brown. i have always been surrounded by the same people who have known me very well and it was always an easy thing for me to be open and myself with them. however, coming to this drastically different environment has challenged me to be vulnerable with people i am just now meeting. when talking about giving in to vulnerability, dr. brown says, “i lost the fight but i probably won my life back” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). she tried hard not to give in and be vulnerable in therapy, but when she finally could be, that is when she felt most like herself and was able to grow closer to the people around her. now, i will continue to be vulnerable here at notre dame while also recognizing that new beginnings at all stages of my life will require me to be put in an uncomfortable position and force me to step out of my comfort zone. 2. i believe that my purpose is to live for my eulogy and not my resume. as a college student, it is easy to get caught up in centering your life around getting good grades and being successful in the future. while these are important things, we must always take a step back and evaluate how we are actually living our lives and not just focus on our accomplishments we are working towards. in his talk about self realization, david brooks says, “in order to fulfill yourself you have to forgive yourself. in order to find yourself you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim fye week two). self realization and growing into a person who lives for their eulogy and not their resume takes time and never happens without forgiveness and a little self doubt. as i continue to work hard in school and look towards my future, i will not forget to focus on what is more important: being my most authentic self. 3. i believe that i grow by accepting my journey of self discovery. coming to college is truly a journey. packing up your life and moving somewhere without your family is a big change and definitely a hard one for most people. what gave me a positive perspective on an otherwise stressful situation was having faith that this journey would get me one step closer to becoming the best version of myself. in one of his videos, fr. pete says that “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be the person that god has created you to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). in this quote, we are reassured that we are well equipped to respond to changes and hardships because god has made us ready. throughout the difficult weeks so far and those to come, i will remember that my abilities and strengths have been made by god to prepare me for anything i come across or am faced with. 4. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by showing respect and expecting it in return. as freshmen in college, we are all coming from places where we knew the people around us for a long time. we have already sorted through who has good intentions and who might not have our best interest in mind. now as we are surrounded by all new people, it is more difficult to know who you really want to surround yourself with. in a video about relationships, the words https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry “that's not love” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four) were said. i think that it can also apply to friends, family members, and really anyone you meet. people might seem genuine, but have malicious intentions. people who are manipulative might try to pass off bad behavior by being out of love. as i seek to create new friendships here, the respect that i put into things, i expect from other people. holding both myself and others to a high standard of love and respect will help me create the life-giving friendships that i am looking for. 5. i believe that i am responsible for using what i have to help other people. going to school here makes it easy for me to feel as though i have been given everything i need to succeed. beyond being at notre dame, i come from a fortunate family who supports me. if i take full advantage of all of the things i have in my life, i have the ability to be successful. carla harris, a medal recipient speaking at a notre dame graduation, says “the way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know, to help others. for that will take your life from success to significance” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). the success that i might have in my life will be lacking meaning if i do nothing but aim to further this success. in other words, my success will be without significance. as i continue to work through college and eventually when i do something with my education after i graduate, i will gear my success towards helping the people around me. 6. i believe that i am searching for a way to never depend on a single story. in week six of moreau class, i wrote a poem about where i am from. about her own poem “where i’m from”, george ella lyon says “besides being a poem in its own right, ‘where i'm from’ can be a map for a lot of other writing journeys” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). this poem i wrote, similar to lyon’s poem, touched on different https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html parts of my life and many things that are important to me. in chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk about single stories, she explains, “so that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this ted talk is about learning to gather more information in order to have a fuller picture of something instead of only one way of thinking. if we stick to a single story, we will have an incorrect or biased/stereotypical view of someone or something. that is why it is important while meeting someone to refrain from making any judgements or assumptions, as you do not fully know them yet. this also relates to the poems about where we are from. taking in everything someone is telling about where they are from might make us see them a certain way when there is really more to them than they are letting on. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration a deep dive into myself root belief #1: i believe that i grow by working with other people during high-school, i always believed that i worked better alone, as i couldn’t get any work done when i was around my friends, since we would just be constantly talking and laughing, instead of actually working on what we were supposed to. this belief was reaffirmed after covid came and the schools closed down, and i was able to get my work done in a much more efficient manner and much quicker by myself as compared to when i was with my friends. therefore, when i came here to notre dame, i expected the same belief that i work better myself to continue as it had my whole life. however, here in the university, i have discovered that although i can complete my work quicker when i am alone, the quality of my work improves dramatically when i am with my friends and i can bounce ideas off of them and reflect on my ideas. nevertheless, this was difficult for me as i’m a closed person, and although i love talking to people, i despise talking about myself and what i am doing. therefore, i had to inspire myself from the first moreau video that i watched, where it was said: “they [people who feel worthy to be loved] were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in return for being who they were. they fully embraced vulnerability.” (the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). furthermore, i believe that by working with other people, i can also strengthen our friendship as, although we are sometimes working on mundane and really boring assignments, whenever we do them together, we are both just happy to be there. henceforth, through this, i form a true friendship whenever i work with other people, as was discussed in olivia taylor’s article: “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). root belief #2: i believe that my purpose is to be good and do good this belief comes from the values that my parents and family have taught to me throughout the years, where they have highlighted the importance of using our privilege and knowledge to help not only ourselves, but also others and provide a common good to the rest of the world. therefore, when i first came to notre dame, i wanted to do good and help others that didn’t have the same opportunities that i was privileged enough to receive. henceforth, as i got here, i applied for a leadership position for the cs4good club, where i would work with local elderly citizens and help them to navigate through the technological world and teach them how to use computers, which i was accepted for. however, as the workload got harder and harder, the project felt like it was a burden on me and i wondered if my time could be better spent working on myself, instead of working to help others. yet, as i continued the project, i felt as if i was continuing to work on the project more for my ‘resume’, instead of to actually help others. this lead me to remember the video that i had watched for week 2 of moreau, where david brooks said: “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii. and the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ problem is, that turns you into a shrewd animal who treats life as a game, and you become a cold, calculating creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity where you realize there's a difference between your desired self and your actual self.” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two). henceforth, with this reflection, i continued to work on the cs4good project and was, once again, comforted by carla harris’ speech, where she discussed the three main tenets that we should live by in order to ultimately live a good life: “1. it is what you do for others that counts 2. fear has no place in your success equation 3. there is only one you” (notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address by carla harris moreau fye week five). with this, i was certain that i was on the right path at notre dame, and that it is my moral duty to be good and do good, yet, being at a catholic university while not coming from a catholic background, i wanted to take advantage of this opportunity and learn more about the importance of spirituality. therefore, in my second week at university, i went to my first mass ever, and although i didn’t enjoy it as much as i thought i would, i did gain a greater appreciation for my spirituality, which was discussed in professor david fagerberg’s article: “this is exactly the purpose of the spiritual life. spiritual life is not a private and secret place in our hearts; it is not some “religious duty” to be dispatched on a sunday morning; it does not concern some place disconnected from our daily life. spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe.” (faith brings light to a dark world by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). henceforth, after reading this article and attending mass, i have gone deeper into my spiritual side, which has confirmed to me the importance of being and doing good, as well as the moral duty that i have to help others and provide a greater good to the world that’s bigger than myself. root belief #3: i believe that i’m searching for a life-long community as i have always moved around brazil, and even outside of brazil, i’ve struggled to maintain a consistent community of friends and close contact with my extended family, as i’m never able to be around them for a sustained period of time. however, i have always attempted to continue in touch with the communities that i was a part of, and with my group of friends, no matter how far away i am from them. at certain times, this belief is challenged as having to consistently maintain contact with my friends and family through the internet (calls, texts, etc.) is not ideal and sometimes it’s a hassle to have to schedule calls with them. however, as soon as i talk to my community of friends and family, i am reminded why i choose to maintain contact with them for the rest of my life. this belief was reinforced after i read george ella lyon’s poem, where she wrote: “from the finger my grandfather lost to the auger, the eye my father shut to keep his sight.” (where i’m from by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). the poem reminded me of my family, and the incredible stories that they have passed on to me, and this inspired me to appreciate my origins in brazil, which is what i decided to focus on in the ‘where i’m from poem’. however, this idea of brazil inside my head is an over-idealized vision of brazil, which is not consistent with the actual reality that the country is in. i realized this the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html following week after i watched chimamanda’s ted talk, where she discussed the idealized version of her home-country which can be passed down: “if i had not grown up in nigeria, and if all i knew about africa were from popular images, i too would think that africa was a place of beautiful landscapes, beautiful animals” (the danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). currently living at notre dame, it’s easy to forget the situation that brazil is in and over-idealize how beautiful the country really is, as the extent to which the people live in poverty and crime is rampant is not clearly visible. therefore, it’s important for me to remind myself of the community which i come from, and always maintain contact with them, regardless of the burden that it may be. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story microsoft word moreau integration 4.docx schenck 1 prof retartha moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 how do i pursue a well-lived life? part i: mission statement (274/1013 words) a root belief that i articulated in the fall semester is maintaining a balance between school, extra curriculars, and the college experience. my belief was emboldened throughout the academic year. i learned to recognize that a 3.7 gpa with memories, relationships, and experiences is far more valuable than anything a solo 4.0 gpa could bring. the exercise of writing my own eulogy further strengthened my belief, for if i were to die today, i would leave behind a life well lived rather than a foundation for a tomorrow that never came. i believe that god is ever-present in the choices i make and hardships i endure, even if some things leave me questioning what, why, and how they happen if god is present. to be successful is to find happiness in doing what is best for both myself and others. i consider the highest good in life to be cognitive resilience/health, for mental strength is the foundation for every decision, step, and opportunity. i consider relationships with no personal gratification to be characteristic of a life well lived, for at the root of them exists selflessness and no anterior motives. i respond to suffering by helping in ways i can. to embrace humanity is to love everyone entirely, and to not use personal beliefs as a means to proctor how other people should live. i grow in wisdom by following my commitments until i fail, and then coming back stronger. i have a responsibility to schenck 2 use the privilege of being a notre dame student to do good with my degree. to act with courage is to ignore doubts standing in the face of righteousness. part ii: how my mission statement will animate my next three years (739/1013 words) i failed my first three college exams. the first exam i failed was in introductory psychology, the second exam i failed was in general biology, and the third exam i failed was in general chemistry. it was an absolute slap in the face… not once, but three times. i went into my midterms with only one a: moreau. i knew these classes were freshman pre-med weed-outs, but i was not expecting to be underperforming in subjects i was historically strong in. i missed out on many social events, hours of sleep, and meals to prepare for the failed exams. moving into the second half of the semester, i took advice from one of my mentors (my boss) in south bend. while i thought i was failing because of a lack of academic preparation, she told me that i was likely failing because of a lack of proper sleep, nutrition, and life balance. after prioritizing what i once put off, i managed to finish the semester with only one b. by continuing to prioritize what may seem like distractions, i continue to perform to my highest ability both in the classroom and in my community. although i do not remember studying for any exam, i do remember the youth lacrosse team i helped coach, the 7th grader in south bend i tutored in math, the neuroscience children’s book i illustrated, and the hospice patient i volunteer for. considering that i believe being successful is finding happiness in doing what is best for both me and others, i grow in wisdom by following such commitments until the end. by balancing four jobs last semester, there were times when i thought i was going to succeed in nothing by trying to do everything. when i would have these thoughts, i would consider which commitment i was going to quit on. however, i knew that i would rather fall short in something schenck 3 than quit on something or someone relying on me. either a restaurant would be understaffed, a kid would no longer have a tutor, a team would no longer have a coach, or a book would have no illustrations. by seeing my four employment commitments until the end, i grew in wisdom by learning not to overcommit myself in the future. if i had merely quit, i may have developed a habit in breaking off whatever commitment tips me over the edge. such a habit would be irresponsible and unfair to those i was quitting on. i continue to grow in wisdom by not only continuing to follow my commitments until the end, but by committing myself to less. my mission to honor my commitments will continue to animate my life by ensuring i find happiness in what i do. the more i commit to, the more i feel obligated to finish instead of honored to attend. by committing to less but remaining devoted, i can be happier in what i do and those i work with will be happier to see more fulfilling results. in three years, my graduating class will be just as close to 30 years old as we will be to the age that we first entered high school (14 years old). the “what do you want to be when you grow up” question will no longer be hypotheticals. i will be graduating undergrad just to enter med school. i will still be years away from my career, racking up medical school debt, and watching my youngest sister graduate high school. when i finally graduate medical school, i will be entering residency to work 80-hour weeks at an hourly wage less than i made waiting tables. however, in three years i will also be able to look back and know my mission statement guided a life well-lived. i knew life was going to fly by, but i was not expecting it to go by this fast. by following an active mission statement as opposed to limiting goals to the future, i will not die with a life full of dreams. my eulogy will not be full of what i wanted to do, but of what i actually did. i came to notre dame with a lot of ambitions, many commitments, and a few dreams. however, i am entering sophomore year with narrowed ambitions, a few commitments, schenck 4 and active goals. in doing so, i will be more successful in what i strive to accomplish and happier during the process. 12/1/21 moreau integration #2 progress and development i feel as though this semester, i have grown and developed a lot as a person. one way that i have accomplished this growth is by asking myself and others important questions. by doing this i have responded to internal and external dissonance around me. one question that i have asked myself is how i can stop living my life according to the expectations of others. this is something that i have struggled with and many of my friends have struggled with as well. after contemplating on this topic, i have realized how bad it is to try to compare yourself to others. we have all been created by god with unique talents and gift. everyone has something special about them. for this reason, we cannot have the same goals as others and can not feel down when we do not achieve the same things that others have. for example, i am not going to feel sad and degraded if i do not score the same number of points as lebron james in a basketball game. he is incredibly gifted in the sport of basketball and very athletic and god gifted me in other areas of life. i should not try to live up to this unrealistic expectation. during week 9 in moreau, i really enjoyed the article called “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”. there was a quote in this article that i loved that states “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life. additionally, when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world.” when you set your expectations according to others, you are basically asking to be disappointed in yourself. sometimes people can accomplish things that are outside of our own power or realm of influence. accepting this fact will help us be happy and ready to face the many challenges throughout our lives. this week (week 9) of moreau helped me to accept this fact and for this reason has allowed to develop personally (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan-moreau fye week nine). throughout this semester at notre dame my priorities and the things i find important have shifted drastically. one thing i find important is how we can better respond to our community and how to make it a better place. notre dame is now my community. it is now my upmost importance to make this community the best it can be. one way that i think i can do that is by disregarding hatred inside of us and lowering the hatred of those around us. one of the most important things to accomplish this is to realize that hatred is inside of us and not on the outside. i really enjoyed the readings and videos from this week. i especially loved the text from father jenkins. the reason for this is because talks about his observations on hatred and how we can make change regarding this. father jenkins says that we cannot directly reduce somebody else’s hatred because people would have done that already. it is better to focus on our own hatred which is always inside of us. we must learn to control this hatred within us using various practices including prayer and meditation. by learning to control our own hatred we are in turn bettering our community. we can also teach others to control their hatred and things they dislike. i really enjoyed a quote in this article which said “second, if we’re going to do battle with hatred, we have to accept for practical purposes that hatred is not out there. it is in here — ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction.”. i also really enjoyed the discussion in this week of moreau as i learned ways to better my community from my peers (wesley theological seminary commencement by father jenkins-fye moreau week 10). something that is more complicated to me is how we treat our “enemies” and those we dislike in our community. i believe it is important to set aside our differences and “turn the other cheek” as jesus says. i learned from this week in moreau that good communities require leadership and i think that is a role that i must try to fill. i can be calm under distress and pressure and feel as if i would do well in a leadership position for my community. i would try to help everyone bond and “make friends not enemies”. i really enjoyed the text called “thirteen ways of looking at community”. my favorite quote from this text was “the reason is simple: relationships in community are so close and so intense that it is easy for us to project on another person that which we cannot abide in ourselves. as long as i am there, the person i least want to live with will be there as well” i really loved this article and this quote because it made me reflect on ways in which we can accept those in our community that we may dislike. we must learn to deal with the conflict in a community because relationships in a tightly knit community are very intense. we must respect the differences that we have with our fellow community members and find things that we have in common. by doing this we can become closer and develop a more intimate bond (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmerfye moreau week 11). one final thing that i feel like i have learned in this course is how to grow in hope and faith. i learned a lot from the texts and class discussions. i think in order to grow in hope we have to do a few things. for one, it is important to have faith and find a purpose. i saw this especially in father moreau. one quote from the article about moreau that i loved was, “throughout his life moreau continued to come up with new ideas and ways to spread the gospel, and he did not hesitate to send out others to carry out that mission. some of those efforts failed while others have endured and prospered far beyond any reasonable expectations”. the reason this quote is so inspirational is because it shows how passionate moreau was about his ideas. he continuously spent his time coming up with new ways to spread the good news of god. in my opinion, this is the best way to grow in hope in life. we have to find something that we are truly passionate about and commit. this quote also shows that we should never give up. many of moreau’s earlier ideas failed but he continued to work and brainstorm. many of his later ideas have endured and prospered and this truly amazes me. this week of moreau has inspired me to take that next step and make a difference. by doing this we can be hopeful about the future and help change the world (hope-holy cross and christian education pages 14-16, by fr. james b. king-fye moreau week 12). 12-1-2021 learning inside & outside the classroom it is crazy that i am close to the end of my first semester of college. two weeks from now i will be done with all my finals and the next day i will be back at home. some of the time during the semester, it is important to appreciate this craziness. a few years before senior year of high school i did not really think of college or even if i will have the chance/money to get into college. i am part of a low-income family so i had doubts on my future, and these doubts dwindled closer to my senior year. i had hope because of others that were in my same shoes, but in higher grade levels, were getting scholarships within my high school. how does this connect with my development so far in the semester? this craziness is the result of being able to get to a place you did not expect to get to. this craziness was only possible because you got to this place only because of reasons you should not take for granted. i am doing this integration for a good grade, but focusing only on school can hinder the strength you had to get to where you are today. additionally, this strength came from others that are back at home and that are not a commonality anymore. “to assume i could instantly meet my new best friends while also getting used to a new place, starting a new academic career, and learning how to adjust to life away from home — that’s a full plate already” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). it is stressful to experience this change, but try to know that your family and friends are rooting for you back at home. let them be your push forward. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). the grotto states this to take away despair from people that have no hope. sometimes it is good to accept your flaws so you can handle your flaws. looking at your flaws you can see where you are now and how these flaws helped you to develop into something greater. the sentence after the quote helps to address this hope in a quite simple and obvious way, but still in a powerful way, as well. “and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). you still have to work to put yourself together. you must put in effort so you can feel better about yourself and need to develop a way of thinking that inspires hope. this hope allows you to start putting your heart back together. in my case, i would not say i need to put my heart back together, but rather my happiness back together. when trying to fix my time management, it became hard to stop procrastinating and to do my work on time. by procrastinating, i was more stressed and sadder. my coping mechanism for this was to realize that tomorrow i will not feel this way when the work is done. when i do not procrastinate, it shows that i learned from my mistakes and i try procrastinate less because i know it will lead to stress. i then know that i can fix my happiness through effort. at notre dame i feel a little out of place, and i was expecting this when i was here. however, i realized early on that i did not have to be out of place since there are a lot of nice people here. i https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ feel welcomed and was greatly pleased with the community here, even as i experience a jump from the three percent of my high school that were white to the sixty-something percent at this school. as it is still a little awkward, it is important to know that “intimacy is neither possible nor necessary” for all the people i meet (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this does not involve crossing races either, it is for all the people that are here. in a way, it would be awkward in any community to be close friends with everyone you meet. lots of communities are not small, so having too many strong relationships is excessive. this can be the same if you feel that some people do not match your interests and would not be the right friends with you. with what i said, it is still important to realize “a capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). the quote tries to highlight that respect is still important. disputes and hate are not the way to go. all this insight came about because of my experience this semester. what i was taught did not come from classes alone, but also from this insight that will allow me to feel more comfortable with individuals and to see the unknown is not too bad. another thing i experienced is a change in learning process. there are so many experiences that are different compared to when i was back home which required me to be more independent. it was strange to do laundry on my own, to buy train tickets in combination with plain tickets, to plan out this trip in the first place, to organize times to eat, to organize social events along with homework, etc. there was so much to do on my own. there were so many things i did for the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ first time or i needed to do on my own way more often to balance school with my social life and my personal life. the trouble i have comes from having no experience. i had to get over the little experience i had with these tasks so i could start learning more and more. “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). this quote goes beyond to explain this. the tasks that i had to do on my own requires me to try to understand what i am doing first. afterward, i must force myself to start and may not be able to use prior experience deal with these things. i learned that this was necessary to succeed in such a complex world that will change around me as i have come from high school to college, will go from first semester to second semester, to sophmore year, to the end of college, then into something i am currently not ready for. i am still developing and can see that from this paper that i have learned a lot from this semester a lone. so, i am ready to not be ready, but will be ready to learn. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration assignment moreau learning to love, grow, and connect with others root belief 1: i believe that i am responsible for sharing my experiences to grow and connect. i think this belief comes from my own experiences with learning from others in order to grow, change, and adapt. not only does the sharing of experiences allow us to grow intellectually, spiritually, and morally as we can learn from what others have endured through, it also allows us to connect and deepen our relationships with our fellow neighbors. in "the power of vulnerability", brené brown mentions that “connection is why we're here. it gives purpose and meaning to our lives” ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown, tedxhouston moreau fye week one). i see this as especially true as without relationships and connections with others, our lives would be much more empty. thus, it is our responsibility to create these relationships in order to create purpose and meaning in our lives as without purpose or meaning, why is our life unique and valuable. as a result, we must share our experiences to fulfill our responsibility to connect and create relationships. in the “2021 laetare medalist address”, carla harris stated that “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i would like to expand this quote and say that our collective authenticity is our distinct advantage. if we all collectively are authentic and share our vast differences and experiences, i can only see humans benefiting and growing in all possible aspects as we learn through the eyes of others. in “danger of a single story,” chimamanda ngozi adichie says that “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize” (“danger of a single story,” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week seven). i find this as a further reason as to why we should all share our experiences and stories. by sharing stories, we allow others to see different perspectives and ideas, and increase the possibility of our stories empowering and humanizing others as they are all out there for others to see. i think this root belief has mostly been affirmed by those in my life, however there have been times where i questioned it myself, especially when i was younger. i often enjoyed figuring things out on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story my own and did not always like to hear advice from others, which sometimes was beneficial but often led to more struggle than was necessary. as a result, in the past, i also thought that others did not need to hear my experiences as i figured out things on my own, so they could as well. however, this not only stunts our growth as we cannot learn from others or allow others to learn from us, but also stunts our ability to connect with others. in addition, there are some things that are impossible to learn about and implement into our lives if we do not connect and grow as a community. as george ella lyon says in his "where i'm from" article, “remember, you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). thus, we have to be vulnerable and share our experiences in order for others to be able to see the world as we do. in general, i think we can see this belief in action anywhere, but one example could be my first couple weeks at notre dame. for the first few days and weeks, it was difficult to form connections with people as i knew two hundred names, hometowns, and majors but not much about who people were. through sharing past experiences and creating new ones over the following weeks, i was able to connect more with people, and in turn i was able to learn and grow as a person by learning from others' backgrounds and experiences. however, i am still reserved at times and would like to continue to grow in this belief to become truly open in my experiences and allow others to hear what i have experienced. root belief 2: i believe that we are made to help and love others. (week 4, week 2, week 3) this belief of mine comes from a similar idea as one i mentioned earlier under my first belief, and that was brené brown’s idea of how connection gives meaning and purpose to our lives. to further push the idea towards helping and loving others, i see no real benefit in having a connection with others and not helping and loving, as then having no connection at all would probably be more beneficial. the whole point of connecting with someone, in my opinion, is to understand, help, and eventually love. by helping and loving others, i also believe that we can easily start building towards a plethora of healthy relationships as in "healthy vs. unhealthy relationships”, healthy relationships are described as ones where people “respect each other. they can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. they trust and support each other” ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf red flag campaign moreau fye week four). if people help and love each other, i think it is natural that they will eventually respect, trust, and support each other. love also relates to our faith and in fact, as professor david fagerberg states in “faith brings light to a dark world”, “to love is to will the good of another [and] god … commands us to love our neighbor” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week three). thus, loving not only brings out the best in us, but also helps others embody goodness. in addition, loving and helping others builds up our relationships with not only our fellow neighbors but also god. i think this root belief has not been challenged in the sense that i or others find it to be incorrect, but more in the sense that it is sometimes difficult to follow at all times. as david brooks says in “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?”, “most of us … would say that the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues. but at least in my case, are they the ones that i think about the most? and the answer is no” — eulogy virtues being virtues such as loving, helping others, and being moral (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, ted moreau fye week two). i find the fact that so many of us do not think about these kinds of virtues constantly implies the idea that they are not important. however, as i stated before, i agree with brooks that eulogy virtues are more important than resume virtues, but they are unfortunately sometimes pushed to the side with the hectic nature of life. in terms of how this belief influences my actions, i try to be as helping to others and as loving as possible. i try not to judge someone based on anything until i have a concrete reason to and once i get to know them. i try to find time to help others with schoolwork or anything else they may need, and usually would be doing some form of community service, however i have not had the time to begin this again here at notre dame. thus, i would like to continue to try to find opportunities to help others, hopefully find the time to meaningfully engage in community service, and to think more about eulogy virtues by not being caught up in the stresses of life all the time. https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104937 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104937 week 8 integration 1 8 weeks in notre dame in the first eight weeks of life in the university of notre dame, i have had my ups and downs, and i can safely say that the moreau class is one of the ups. the class is filled with friendly peers and we get to chill and have fun while also learning a lot. i have come to immerse myself within both the sciences and literature, and i witnessed my own personal values have grown from these two months or so. i believe that courage is essential to many things in life. one of the things to have courage for is to be vulnerable or show vulnerability. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) when i am faced with challenges and difficult questions in physics, i let down my pride and i let people around me know that i need help with this subject, and even though i showed that i was vulnerable, i got the help i needed and i got better at physics. i also believe that by showing some vulnerability, i can find some place to belong to. to make that initial step to show something about myself can let me find like-minded people, and who knows, perhaps life-long friendships can be made. i believe that self-improvement is also important. society places too much emphasis on materialistic possessions, and not enough on love and compassion. (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) it is also about how much money we earned last month or how big the house is, but we never ask ourselves whether we have shown kindness to others who need it. every act of kindness means more than you think. obviously we need to earn money to survive, but self growth is important, and the scale that balances these two things is not even by society’s standards today. i believe that faith comes a long way for all purposes in life, both figuratively and literally. (“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by notre dame students moreau fye https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view week three) faith as a concept isn’t just useful, it keeps us driven and living in the long term. it doesn’t necessarily even need to be based on a religion. faith tells us that even though things seem bleak and hopeless, things will get better as time goes on. having faith in others can deepen relationships and friendships, as trust is built among one another. i believe that an essential aspect of life is to build healthy and multi-wayed relationships. i think that it is easy to forget to account for the needs of others and as a result, relationships grow stale and toxic. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor” moreau fye week four) a healthy relationship goes both ways and makes sure everyone is accounted for, and people should be more conscious of this as we enter adulthood. i think it is also crucial that we strengthen and establish relationships by actively helping out others. (“it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" by notre dame football team moreau fye week four) when we see something that could negatively affect people, whether it’s someone we are close to or a complete stranger, it is important to speak up and show support. that way, we can build relationships based on trust and respect, and reduce toxicity and harm within our communities. i believe that i grow by absorbing and listening to the narratives of others. obviously one of the most significant narratives as a notre dame student is the story of how notre dame was established ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) notre dame isn’t just founded on the belief of religious faith; it is also based on the idea of a well-rounded education and acceptance. to listen to the stories of other people perfectly embodies a well-rounded education and acceptance. we should actively hear out how others live their lives and show them respect. as such, we become kind and knowledgeable members of society, and we further grow our identity and rewrite or add to what we already know. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 identifying how we are influenced is also integral to life. consider what aspects of our life, from the moment we were born to the very present, how the people, events, and processes affect our decisions, thoughts, and opinions. (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6) as i said in the previous paragraph, we can put together what we learn from listening to others and doing some introspective thinking on ourselves, and come to a better and more well-rounded understanding of the world around us. many things could have influenced our life, from the floor we lived on growing up to the people we surround ourselves with to the food we put in our stomach. consider how such an upbringing is good and bad, and improve the bad while emphasising the good. also understanding that other people can have a completely set of influences helps with our mindset and perception. last but certainly not least, i believe that it is of utmost importance to identify the perspectives of other people. this point has been repeated a few times before, but it is important in my opinion. not exposing oneself to other perspectives, cultures, and stories could be damaging for their own self-growth and knowledge. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) adichie speaks on her own experiences in this ted talk. she only grew up with stories of british and american white children who look vastly different from her, so she wasn’t exposed to people like her in the books she often read. however, she also found misconceptions beyond the inked-filled pages of her books. travelling around her home, and eventually the world, has shown her that people are not what they seem like at first glance or from the tellings of other people. according to adichie, the very same idea can be applied to those who met adichie herself. in conclusion, notre dame has helped me develop all these core beliefs, and i believe that my experience here can only reinforce and develop my own self-growth. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau first year experience 13 oct 2021 faith, family, and fairness: the beliefs that define me who we are as people is derived from what we believe. our beliefs are what define as individuals and are also how we find a sense of community. over the past 7 weeks, i have tried to analyze not only what i believe, but why i believe it. i have come up with 5 root beliefs that define me as a person. i have engaged with all these beliefs at some point over the last 7 weeks. i believe that there is something powerful about being your authentic self. i believe that establishing meaningful relationships with people we care about is very important. i believe that living to grow in faith and kindness is more important than trying to achieve success in the modern world. i believe that everyone needs to strive for a world where all people are seen as equals. lastly, i believe that going to notre dame is aiding me in my journey to be a more complete person. one of my beliefs is that there is something powerful about being your authentic self. this is not always easy. personally, there have been times in my life where i was not my authentic self because i was influenced by what other people wanted me to be. i have felt pressured do be involved with things because of what the crowd was doing. however, i feel that i have grown in this aspect of my life. by realizing that i am an individual and what i want for myself is going to be different from what the world wants, i feel like i am being a more authentic person. authenticity can be achieved through vulnerability with yourself or people who you are close with. this is challenging because being vulnerable can bring up things that make you angry or fearful. dr. brené brown described this struggle as she said, “you can't say, here's the bad stuff. here's vulnerability, here's grief, here's shame, here's fear, here's disappointment. i don't want to feel these. i'm going to have a couple of beers and a banana nut muffin.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). personally, i struggled to be vulnerable with my parents about the difficulty of classes here at notre dame. once i did though, i felt better and realized that i had told them authentically what i felt. this made me feel human and allowed me to be in tune with what i believe. i also believe that establishing meaningful relationships with the people we care about is more important than trying to be successful in the modern world. i want to clarify that i believe that it is important to strive for success and work hard in your life, but it can’t come at the expense of your faith. david brooks mentions this when he speaks about adam i vs. adam ii personality in our lives. “adam i is built by building your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). adam ii challenges us to be people that care about being kind and having a balanced life rather than doing what the modern culture wants us to do. in my opinion, an adam ii life ties directly with being a faithful person. as notre dame student victor described, “if i were to one day lose all the clothes on my back, and if i was to one day lose all the food and wealth i had to spend, and if i were to lose all the people i had in my life, the one thing that i could never lose and that no one could ever take away from me is my faith.” (“student reflections on faith” by notre dame campus ministry – moreau fye week three). this is precisely the reason i believe faith is more important than anything materialistic. possessions of the world come and go, but our faith and what we believe can last forever. i believe in establishing meaningful relationships with the people we care about. for me, family is something that is at the center of life. i pride myself on having a very tight relationship with my family and believe it is something that greatly defines me. i wanted to emphasize this in my poem when i said, “the place you’re from is made by the people you have spent your life with, all other things are secondary to that fact” (“where i’m from poem” by – moreau fye week 6). i believe that my relationship with my family is being put to the test now that i am very far from my home in miami. however, i believe that because i have a healthy and strong relationship with them, it will not be damaged. friendships are also essential relationships to have in life. it is important to distinguish what a healthy friendship and a toxic friendship is. a healthy friendship allows for both people to mutually grow while a toxic one involves domination and damage from one person at the expense of the other. “a friend who uses you may treat you like a therapist but never ask about how you’re doing.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). this quote from olivia taylor represents how i feel about relationships. it is crucial for all relationships to have open communication that is equal and isn’t controlled by one person. i believe that we need to strive for a world where all people are seen as equals. it may be tough to admit, but all people have certain implicit biases that stop this from becoming a reality. factors like race, ethnicity, and economic status play a role. every person is a unique individual so when we group them into stereotypical categories about their background, we are damaging our relationships. chimamanda ngozi adichie reflects on this when she states “all i had hear about them was how poor they were, so that it had become impossible for me to see them as anything else but poor. their poverty was my single story of them.” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). i believe that constantly engaging with other people that come from a different background from your own can be very helpful in trying to stop your own implicit biases. an equal world is one where stereotypes about your background don’t define your identity. lastly, i believe that going to notre dame is aiding in my journey to become a more complete person. i think that the holy cross mission of the school embodies what i want in my life: an education that equally considers the mind and the heart. though i feel that the school has been very rigorous regarding the classes, i like that i can go to areas like the grotto and reflect on my day. the holy cross mission allows for me to pursue my education while also living a life of great faith. i believe that this ties back in with the adam i and adam ii concept that i learned in week 2 of moreau. a notre dame education prepares your adam i mindset by allowing you to be ready in the modern world with a job while it places an adam ii mindset of being a good and faithful person at its core. fr. edward sorin described notre dame accurately when he said, “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” by fr. edward sorin – moreau fye week 5). the 5 root beliefs i have are what i believe define me as a person. it is not enough to just state these beliefs, however. anyone could say that they believe in being a person of faith or a loving friend but putting what we believe into action is where we truly experience growth. embodying our root beliefs in our lives is what allows us to be complete people. week 8 integration 1 geiger 1 mr. anthony poletto moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 notre dame has strengthened my core beliefs and created new ones coming to notre dame, i was already steadfast in my beliefs. i knew what i believed about the world, and i knew what i wanted out of my life. that being said, upon my arrival to notre dame, much of what i believed was shaken and some of these beliefs have since changed. however, this is not bad in any way. the experience of college is meant to be a time of reflection and growth; it is a transition from childhood to adulthood. as a result of its transformative nature, college often changes the way that students view the world around them. in just the short time that i have been here, notre dame has not only strengthened many of the beliefs that i hold, but it has also formed some of my beliefs. i hold many root beliefs. my first root belief is that all problems will improve over time; i just have to be patient. all people experience hardships at every point in their lives. what i have found, however, is that these problems are usually short-lived. troubles that i was having a year ago are no longer a problem. furthermore, my problems right now will not be troubling me a year from now. i believe that time is able to heal all wounds. my time at notre dame only strengthened this belief. during the first week at school, i was struggling to develop connections and relationships with other students. seven weeks later, i have a solid group of friends in my dorm, in my classes, and in the clubs that i have joined. the syllabus explains that i will be “invited to engage with practices of defining, discerning, and developing a vision of a life well-lived.” (“mfye syllabus” moreau fye week 1). one of the ways that i have worked to geiger 2 create a “life well-lived” is through the friendships that i have formed. friendships are vital for any healthy, well-rounded person. this is because “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week 4). the example of friendship is just one way that time has been able to improve situations. but it is for this reason that notre dame has further proven to me that time is able to solve any problem. this is not the only example, however, of how notre dame furthered my root beliefs. notre dame also strengthened my belief that religion has an immeasurable impact in my life. while religion is important in all aspects of life, i believe that it is the most helpful when i am struggling. after my grandma was diagnosed with advanced pancreatic cancer, i leaned further into religion as a source of hope. even though i knew that she was going to pass away, i trusted that she would also find eternal life. this is exactly the belief of ted brooks. he explains, “nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). hope, achieved through religion, has been able to console me during difficult times in my life. i have found that my time at notre dame has only furthered the importance of religion in my life, which has made me a hopeful person. the improvement of my faith and overall spirituality at notre dame is so crucial because “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” ("faith brings light to a dark world" by david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). since notre dame has improved my spirituality, all parts of my life have become better while i have been here. while notre dame has strengthened my root beliefs, it has also opened my eyes to entirely different perspectives of what is important to me. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=en https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ geiger 3 during high school, i thought school and academics were the most important aspects of my life; however, notre dame has taught me that this is not the case. a new root belief that i hold is the importance of being a well-rounded person. father kevin groves stated, “the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin groves c.s.c moreau fye week 5). i have learned that while academic success is important, it is not the only important part of school. i also need to develop as a person; a person who has friendships, a deep faith, and a kind heart. i have realized the importance of “personal development” in the short time that i have been here. in my poem, i wrote, “despite the fact that my friends are all not here with me now, they are still supporting me. i am on the phone with them multiple times a week” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week 6). just because i do not see these people nearly as much as i used to does not mean that they no longer play a role in my life. instead, these people from home will always have a place in my life, and i have to remain in touch with them. this “personal development” also extends beyond just friendships. it also plays a part in how i treat others. unfortunately, “many of us are more biased than we realize. and that is an important cause of injustice—whether you know it or not” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7). while i know that i also hold implicit bias, i am now making a more conscious effort to address my biases and also meet new people who can teach me about situations, events, and cultures that i have never experienced before. notre dame truly has changed my perspective. i now understand the importance of a balanced life in both academic and personal growth. what is truly amazing is i have been here for less than two https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/keith-payne/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/laura-niemi/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/john-m-doris/ geiger 4 months. i cannot begin to imagine how my perspectives and beliefs will further change as i continue. notre dame has both strengthened many of my root beliefs and it has also helped me to create new root beliefs. more specifically, the college experience proved to me that i have to be patient when i am experiencing difficulty. when i first arrived, i was struggling to make friends. now, i have many friends that i have a great time with. clearly, time can help solve many problems. secondly, notre dame further showed me just how important religion is in my life. this is because religion plays an aspect in every part of life. by allowing god to enter my life, i can find fulfillment in all that i do. finally, notre dame has also helped me create entirely new root beliefs. i now appreciate being a well-rounded person. if i were to focus entirely on school, i would have already burnt out. however, now by focusing on both my academic and personal growth, i can set myself up for success in the future, while also enjoying my time. in less than two months, notre dame has transformed my life in ways that i never thought possible. god’s plan: the struggle of comparison and hopelessness root belief 1: comparison can be combatted with mindfulness. transitioning to college is different and more or less difficult for nearly every individual, but for me, it was especially challenging because i came in with too many expectations. i thought that it would be a piece of cake to apply for summer programs, balance a social life, and get involved with clubs i was going to commit to right off the bat. however, as i actually sat down to write those long application essays, planned my outfits for the next football game, and club-hopped -a bit confused in regards to what clubs i’m actually interested in joining -i realized that these immediate expectations were definitely not the case. often, i experienced what bergmann did in the sense that i also spent time on social media to compare what my college experience looked like to others. i wasted so much time “determining whether their college looked like more fun than [mine], if they had made more friends than [i] had,” and they were “just meaningless justifications for [my] unhappiness” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). despite the advice i received from upperclassmen to avoid this mindset and express my feelings of disappointment, i still compared my experience and struggles as a freshman to others’. i had to actually see the negative impacts of expectations and comparison weigh down on me before actually taking steps to stop my negative behavior. however, i also feel that learning this lesson the hard way strengthened me in the best way possible. kirsten states through her kintsugi workshop, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kinstugi workshop” by the grotto moreau fye week 10). when i experienced the heartbreak of comparing myself to others and all the unground expectations i had formed, i realized that my heart was indeed mendable and that all i had to do was have a more rational mindset. yes, perhaps forming expectations is not something that you can consciously prevent, but the more cognizant you are of your expectations and irrational thoughts, the better you are at appreciating the present and focusing on yourself. by the end of freshman year, i anticipate that i might still struggle with a comparison, but i would like to be able to say that i no longer see social media as a tool to compare myself and my experiences to others; rather, i would like to use it solely as a tool to share my experiences with those that i love and to see the lives of my friends and family evolve while i do so. i will make it a goal to, every time i open my social media apps, to mindfully ask myself if i am using it for the sole purpose of comparison and if i am, to change my behavior immediately. just like harnessing intuitive eating or meditation, i plan to have more self-control in this aspect of my life through mindfulness. root belief 2: hopeless brings about dark periods in one’s life but can be prevented by trusting god. stepping onto notre dame’s campus, and arguably even during the summer beforehand, i already knew that i was quite burnt out from high school. perhaps i wouldn’t have been burnt out if i hadn’t experienced distance learning; however, the obscene workload my teachers gave despite students’ mental drain from being in class on zoom all day did not help my senioritis. i started to resent school and forgot how to take fulfilling breaks. when i came to campus and my roommate told me she didn’t even experience distance learning, to say that i envied her would be an understatement. i was so envious of her because she obviously, in my view, had a much easier high school experience than i did. what i didn’t recognize at the time was that it’s unfair to judge someone’s experience through comparison. according to the klau center archive on race, “each story is a part of a bigger story,” and it is incredibly unfair to assume one had a better experience than i solely based on one factor. (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). this one factor in her life did not reflect the hardships she and her family might have gone through during quarantine whether it be an economic or social hardship. all i can do, or what i should have done, during quarantine to avoid burnout was to practice some kind of hope in my life whether it be through journaling or confiding in my friends about my personal struggles instead of feeling justified for despising my quarantined situation by comparing my life to my friends’ lives which were seemingly but not justifiably better. i should have also recognized that fr. king was right in saying, “in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week 12). not only do i have to have hope for my future, but i also have to have hope for god’s plan and purpose for me. i feel that having hope in my own future is uncertain as my hopes will always be rooted in my personal desires, but trusting god with my future is the most realistic expectation to have. god’s will, as long as i trust and pray to him, is bound to come true. by developing a relationship with him, i will no longer feel anxieties about the future or whether or not another dark age, like quarantine will enter my life. with god, everything will come intro fruition, and that is what will strive me to push through. i had a phone converstaiotn with a priest from back home about my inner struggles and resentments, and he told me something simple: everyday, i should spend 10 minutes just talking to god. to further prevent the negative effects of these dark periods in my lifeand to instill hope in my heart to continue pushing through, i will make it a goal to spend at least 10 minutes a day with him. it could be on my walk to my first class or maybe by even visiting the grotto at night, but i will strive to be mindful of my trust in god’s plan and to intentionally dedicate those 10 minutes entirely to god because it is his purpose which will push me through life, not my own whims. this semester, i have encountered comparison and hopelessness, but i plan on responding with mindfulness and trust in god. i plan to continue growing until the end of my first year by using social media as a tool to share my experiences rather than compare them and to dedicate time to god every day. one day, i will fully entrust my experiences and life struggle to god knowing that all is according to his plan, but in order to reach that day, i must be cognizant of my struggles and make definite and repeated steps to reach him. integration essay samberg moreau 6 october 2021 integration essay i believe that i am courageous; however, in my first week here, i did not hold the same belief. dr. renee brown’s definition of courage, “to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart,” at first, scared me for it was just my first week as a college student and i was away from my family for the first time (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). trying to meet new friends, especially when i came here with none, proved to be quite a challenge as i had to show people who i was as a person, without trying to turn them away. so, in the beginning, i did not tell my entire story and, in turn, i was not courageous. after coming to a realization about the type of people who are here (the accepting kind), i realized that i do not need to hide my story and, as a matter of fact, it is much better to share more about myself when meeting new people. interesting enough, courageousness also comes with truthfulness. to be courageous, i realized, i had to look in the mirror and accept every part of myself that makes me, me. further, to understand who you are as a person, you “have to lose yourself in order to find yourself’ (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that, in my process of losing myself, coming to notre dame was my first step. at home, to a certain extent, i was surrounded by similar people with similar experiences, getting “lost” in others’ experiences, experiences which i have learned here, has allowed me to find a deeper understanding of myself and the path that life may or may not take me on as i progress through college in the next three years. also new to my experience at notre dame is faith and, for that, i believe that i want to be a man of faith as i go through college. coming from a town with little catholic representation, faith has never had an effect on how i carry myself; yet, after being here for just two months and attending mass weekly, i have a deeper understanding on the positive benefits faith has on my life, “when my spiritual lighting changes, what i can see spiritually also changes” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). while i may not be studying theology, i like to think, as kyle moon puts it, that i am “doing theology” meaning i hold faith in my every action, as a friend or, hopefully, as a doctor in the future where i can forge relationships with friends or patients in the future. part of building these relationships is a true, unbreakable bond: love. love, olivia taylor claims, comes in many forms but “attention is the rarest form of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). i believe that i can grow myself by becoming more attentive. in today’s technological age, it is too easy to get lost in your phone; by many (including myself), the phone is considered an addiction. by finding other ways to entertain myself, for example, meaningful conversation or physical exertion i can build stronger relationships with those i consider to be close to me. after looking at my screentime trend going down over the past two months, i can say that, since being here, i am going in the right direction. even though the downtrend in screen time could also be related to an increase in time studying, i can testify that i am building different friendships here compared to ones back at home. here, it seems, i have found i can connect with people easier, even after just two short months, a blink of the eye compared to the time i had with friends back at home. i believe that i am from relationships, in my poem from week 6, i penned “i have formed myself through relating with others, spending time to find a friend, all of whom, so far, have built me to be myself.” from the lifelong relationships i was gifted in my parents and sister or the relationship i built with the local pizza shop owner, i have found who i want to be and how i want to be known by others. through relating with others, i have found two valuable lessons. first, i came to understand that i find joy in kindness and respect, two pillars i have let guide me through a large majority of my life. second, i have found more experiences, leaving me with a better understanding of the world and the struggles that some have to endure and carry with them through their lives. i believe that i am responsible for being aware but i also recognize that, like everyone else, i also have implicit bias. for too long, as a result of the culture in the united states, i have “heard and seen different versions of the single story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adiche moreau fye week 7). the single story can be defined as stereotypical norms that have been told to us about other cultures— cultures that we have little to no original knowledge on. now, given the resources to easily become culturally aware (through personal connections or literature at the university), i must take on the responsibility to limit the implicit bias that can impede me from building deeper connections with students and, hopefully, lifelong friends. i understand that i have been given the opportunity to meet good humans from every corner of the globe, i must take full advantage of the advantages that could come with building a web that reaches across just the united states. going forward, i want to be able to build more “i believe that…” statements for they are powerful, defining characteristics that embody my most important values. at notre dame, i have no doubt that, through faith and the people around me, i will build stronger beliefs to stand behind. microsoft word document6 kevin mckenna mr. whittington moreau first year 14 october 2021 growing under the dome i believe that the friendships that i make are the root of my happiness. whether that be with my classmates, my family, or with god. i realized just before writing this essay that i was on the phone with my dad, a notre dame alumnus who graduated in 1995. i could not stop raving to him about how many great friends i have made in siegfried hall. i feel like the strong foundation i have within my dorm helps me love everything i do at notre dame. as brene brown stated in her ted talk, “connection is why we are here. it gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (brown). there is no question that in the past two months here i have formed some amazing and fulfilling friendships. i have great friends who have strong values and are great to spend time with. additionally, they have a strong moral compass which betters the entire community. brown claims, “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (brown). i definitely see this playing out in my life as i came from loving parents. i believe many brothers in siegfried hall benefit from this too after talking to them about their family lives. additionally, i think life-giving relationships come from possessing similar virtues as your peers. the most meaningful friendships are the ones that are formed out of virtue, not utility or similar interests. both of those aspects can be a shallower part of relationships, but virtue is like the ocean floor. it is the most important thing that grounds a stable relationship. however, this aspect of relationships is often overlooked in our world today. as david brooks claims in his ted talk, “most of us, including me, would say the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues. but, at least in my case are they the ones i think about the most? and the answer is no” (brooks). the university of notre dame gives students a unique opportunity to reflect on the eulogy virtues while still receiving an elite education in terms of our resume virtues. i think that is something that makes me so fond of this school is the duality between cultivating the mind and heart. it plays a role in my everyday life through my classmates whether it be learning or in social settings. i think that every community should strive to be like notre dame by setting the whole person flourish. furthermore, one of the key elements of human flourishing comes from faith. seeking god is one of the most important reasons i chose to come to notre dame. after going from public school to a jesuit high school, i see the importance of faith being paired with education. spirituality helps guide my actions and makes me understand the bigger picture in life. at the end of the day, our achievements and titles will fade away and be forgotten, but the way we choose to live our lives will not be. as david fagerberg states, “when the lighting changes, what i can see changes. when my spiritual lighting changes, what i can see spiritually also changes. spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (fagerberg). in my day-to-day life, i try to utilize my catholic faith as a moral compass to do good in my community. right now, that is simply being a good member of this community. however, in community people do not always agree. we have many different perspectives in our moreau section and our campus community as a whole. even when we do not see eye to eye with others, we can still respect them. the golden rule “respect—partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other’s opinions, friends, and interests. they listen to each other” (red flag campaign). on a small scale, i feel like this has been a key driver to our moreau class being successful. whether people have similar or conflicting views, everyone is respectful to one another. as i have stated in class, i have an extremely deep-rooted relationship with the university of notre dame. both of my parents graduated from here and were even married in the basilica. additionally, i was baptized in the log chapel by father joyce c.s.c. having had many holy sacraments that are influential to my family performed on these grounds, it makes the founding story of notre dame even more special to me. “everything was frozen, and yet it all appeared so beautiful. the lake, particularly, with its mantle of snow, resplendent in its whiteness, was to us a symbol of the stainless purity of our august lady, whose name it bears; and also, of the purity of soul which should characterize the new inhabitants of these beautiful shores” (sorin). i am beyond grateful to be in a place that is so special to me during four of the biggest developmental years of my life. every day i wake up here in the morning, i view as a blessing. i think that this campus has always been a crucial part of my journey and i am so excited to be here. as my poem from week 6 states, “however, while i reside under the dome for the next chapter of my life, i will never forget where i came from. the many schools, many friends, and many gifts that ultimately led me to the place i now call home, notre dame.” i have had so much time to grow as a person before i came here. i hope to develop my unique perspective even further by being surrounded by my amazing classmates. there is so much i can learn from them and vice versa. one of the ways that can be achieved is through being open to unique perspectives. “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice. it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure” (payne, niemi, doris). ultimately, the greatest thing about my journey is the people i will meet. as i mentioned in the very beginning, community is the root of happiness; i am blessed to be part of a great one here at notre dame. i am honestly not sure where the journey will take me, but i am only a college freshman once, so i want to enjoy this time for everything that it is worth. works cited https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=emb_title (the power of vulnerability by brene brown) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim (should you live for your resume or your eulogy by david brooks) https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fal l_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau (faith brings light to a dark world by david fagerberg) unhealthy vs healthy relationships (the red flag campaign) sorin letter to moreau by father edward sorin c.s.c. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ (how to think about implicit bias by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris) chung 1 dr. vanessa chan moreau fye 15 october 2021 what i am made to believe having been raised in a catholic high school and attending catholic school my whole life, belief is innately integrated into my being. in week 6, we discussed what has formed us, and this upbringing in the church has shaped my decisions, choices, and actions today. on campus, i have gotten involved primarily in campus ministry and service events, such as being the commissioner-in-training in my dorm for organizing service and faith-based endeavors, including fundraising for saint adalbert’s school. the heavy emphasis on religion throughout my childhood also led me to immediately associate belief with religion. however, through the growth and maturation that accompanies age and is required for success in college, i have come to recognize that i not only have external beliefs, but i have beliefs about myself and what i am meant to accomplish and do. i consider myself to be a dedicated and individualistic individual, but also an encouraging and collaborative one. therefore, one of my foremost beliefs is that i am made to push both myself and others to perform each task and live to the very best of our abilities. during the fourth week of moreau fye, we discussed the ways in which we can create positive relationships. i was particularly impacted by the assertion that “a healthy, balanced, mutual friendship involves peers who ask questions and bounce ideas back and forth” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week 4). while this directly pertains to healthy relationships, as i often think about things in the context of my own life, i also https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ chung 2 related this concept to the ways in which i interact with the peers i encounter on a daily basis. while emotionally or spiritually stimulating conversations require a healthy back and forth of conversation, intellectually stimulating ones do too. healthy relationships with lab partners in my chemistry and biology courses and with partners for discussion in my theology usem require requited attention and devotion to any ongoing conversation. when engaging in these interactions, i always try to put my best foot forward, pushing my peers to provide their best work and use critical thinking skills, not only to get the most of class or a discussion, but also to better ourselves intellectually and foster positive, beneficial relationships. however, i sometimes have difficulty in achieving my goal pushing others, as well as myself, to become our best selves. i, like all individuals, am flawed and have traits that impede my ability to most effectively interact with others and collaborate to become the best versions of ourselves possible. upon completing the via character survey during week 2, the knowledge that i am a strong leader, but struggle with vulnerability was reinforced. while i often use my leaderships skills to spearhead a charge, whether it entails organizing a study group in the library or inviting new friends to the dining hall, i often struggle to be vulnerable with others and reveal what i consider to be weaknesses with others. due to this fact, dr. brown’s ted talk from week 1 heavily resonated with me. i thought dr. brown’s honesty about her struggle for vulnerability served as a testament that while vulnerability is difficult to accept for many people, once you choose to work towards the courage and love that vulnerability requires, you can be a more vulnerable and wholehearted person. entering freshman year, i seek to build meaningful relationships and grow in academic, social, and personal facets. dr. brown emphasizes how being vulnerable takes courage, but is rewarding as it allows us to create the connections that we all intrinsically seek. additionally, it enables us to be wholehearted and happy, which are traits chung 3 indubitably associated with our best selves. when dr. brown said that “[wholehearted people] fully embraced vulnerability. they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), i realized that vulnerability makes people wholehearted and incredible, not “weak.” this wholeheartedness helps foster the positive and genuine relationships that make it possible to engage in mutually beneficial discussions and lifestyles that enrich my goal of pushing both myself and others to be our best, even if that means branching outside of my comfort zone. since arriving at college, i have acknowledged my tendency to avoid vulnerability and have worked to rectify this avoidance, even if only through small instances. when i begin to become overwhelmed with assignments, i reach out to my friends and describe my stress or ask for help, something i often have trouble admitting i need. i have come to recognize that this vulnerability is not a weakness, rather it helps me create deeper connections with other people that allow me to be my best self and encourage others to be their most authentic and best selves as well. in relation to my belief that i am made to encourage myself and others to be our best selves is my belief that i am responsible for fostering not only the acceptance of differences, but the appreciation of them, as communities are best when inclusive and diverse. during week 7, we discussed the pursuit of truth and ways in which the truth can be distorted. in a moving ted talk, chimamanda ngozi adichie emphasizes the problem with what she calls the “single story.” she says that when only one version, side, or perspective of a story is told, it stereotypes individuals and puts them into one category. she asserts, “the single story creates stereotypes and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story. . . it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story chung 4 7). this single story is incredibly common in the modern world in which people form first impressions and judgements based on stereotypes, appearances, or other arbitrary categorizations. upon examining what has formed me during week 6, i realized that my experiences as a bi-racial, asian american have prepared me to constantly seek new ways to combine individuals, concepts, or groups that may seem to oppose each other. when i encounter strife or disagreements, i often seek to reconcile these differences or disagreements due to my upbringing in two different cultures. i actively work to help others overcome differences or contrasts, even in mundane settings, such as helping roommates in my dorm reconcile disagreements. while i recognize the importance of this ability and prioritization and will continue encouraging all communities i encounter to be the most inclusive, and thus the best, they can be, this is not always an easy task or one i wish i was equipped for. especially when meeting new people, a common occurrence during the first semester in college, it can be worrisome that i too will be stereotyped or pigeon-holed into a single story. despite the openmindedness of the university of notre dame and the myriad of impressive and kindhearted people i have met here, i have also experienced moments of uncomfortability in which i feel as if my race impacts how people view me. in a moment in which i sought to display vulnerability in front of my peers, i shared in moreau when one of my tas implied that my handwriting was messy as english was a second language that i was not well-practiced in. while difficult and unsettling, this interaction furthered my determination to continue fostering an environment in which everyone’s differences are accepted and celebrated, as i recalled how it felt to be in a community that did not uphold these values. i believe that i am responsible for nurturing and developing an atmosphere in which everyone can feel comfortable and included, something we chung 5 all seek and something that will permit both individuals and the broader community to be the best they can be. this belief is closely related to my belief that i grow as both a person and in my faith by working through difficulties. in the past 8 weeks, i have experienced difficulties that i expected as a college freshman, but still was not entirely prepared for. after a poor decision or performance on an exam, it is easy for me to become very easily discouraged and feel inadequate or that i did not prepare well enough. as i have been very academically driven and tend to orient my life around school, receiving a grade that i would have in high school was very shocking and disheartening to me. during the first few weeks of school, i was overly focused on just school and did not get involved in the campus at all due to these worries. however, after week 3 when we discussed how faith alters our outlook of the world, i recognized that faith could help me work through these difficult times. reading lala’s (a current notre dame senior) remarks in the campus ministry pamphlet reminded me that in moments of difficulty, we can look to faith and service in order to alleviate stress and gain perspective. father kevin’s video from the fifth week of class when we identified narratives further proved this idea to me when he asserted that “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by father kevin grove – moreau fye week 5). i have begun to realize that struggling is wholly normal and not something to be embarrassed about or hide from others. rather, it is a manageable concept that provides me with the opportunity to grow closer to and appreciate god’s presence in my life. even this past sunday, with 3 exams and 2 papers due for midterms, i allotted the time to attend 9:00 mass in my dorm. i ensured that i could go to mass and devote time to cultivating my relationship with god, as it both provides relief and can help transform my failures and stresses into opportunities for growth. with these realizations, i have https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 chung 6 started to use all occasions, even those of stress, as times to “to live in a way internally that honors god, creation, and our possibilities,” (“should you live for your resume... or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week 2) as adam ii (versus adam i) would. i have realized that the best version of ourselves, our adam ii, is the one who wants to accomplish things in the name of god and all of the gifts that he has given to us, in both the easy and the difficult times. i think that this quote is particularly important because as i enter college, i want to excel, learn, and leave a positive impact on others, developing my faith and growing throughout all circumstances. i know that it's pivotal to remember that everything i do ought to be done with god, his plans for me, and the best well-being of others in mind as well. the first 8 weeks of college have shown me that i believe that i am made to encourage both myself and others to become our best selves, nurture an appreciation for differences and unify separate groups, and grow as both a person and in my faith through difficult experiences. while these goals may seem separate or lofty, as i enact them, i have realized how intertwined they are and that being my best self requires being a part of an inclusive community centered in faith and support. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim week 8: integration assignment #1 julia mcgibbon integration assignment a vulnerable and examined life worth living i have changed in more ways than i thought i would over the past couple months here at notre dame. being away from my family and balancing my life without the stability of my well traversed life at home has been challenging. still, being in such an unfamiliar environment has allowed me to explore some of my root beliefs. i believe that i form human connections through vulnerability, i believe that i grow and pursue truth through experiences, and i believe that i am responsible for my own actions and that i learn to be a more compassionate person through them. the first root belief that i have clarified during my time here is that the best way to form human connections is through honesty and vulnerability. as brene brown states in her video, “you are imperfect, you are wired for struggle, and you are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau week one). i’ve realized this is true through the love that my family and friends have shown me when i have been vulnerable in the past. my relationships with other students here have also deepened the most during times of difficulty, whether it be for me or them-for instance, after i did terribly on my physics exam, my friend cece helped me talk me through it and we are far better friends for that. the human desire to comfort someone when they are in distress helps bring friends closer together. in contrast, a fear and unwillingness to be vulnerable actually limits our ability to form quality relationships. while it is not easy to open up to others, vulnerability is actually an attractive trait as all people can relate to the hardships of life. that being said, sometimes there are individuals that will try to heighten your insecurities. these people are not true friends and are almost always deeply insecure themselves. in contrast, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign moreau week four). there are only so many hours in a day and time is precious, so why waste it with people who don’t improve your quality of life? if you are honest with someone in a relationship and that person shames you for it, that is not a reflection on you, rather on them. fear should not limit one’s exploration of friendships and instead one should accept the beauty of a true vulnerable friendship. my second root belief is that growth and truth come through life experiences. as socrates once said, “the unexamined life is not worth living.” this belief comes from the fact that, when i reflect on when i have learned the most in my life, it is always during specific experiences: transferring schools, dating my first boyfriend, or failing my first test. while all of these experiences meant serious hardship for me, i also found that, as father pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete moreau week three). i love knowing that, even if i experienced something difficult, i walk away from that experience a wiser, better version of myself. however, i’ve found that david brooks speaks directly to an issue i encounter when i, in this process of learning, sometimes i prioritize “external success” over “internal value” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau week two). this “perpetual self confrontation” that he addresses ultimately stems from human selfishness and the desire to achieve material success https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim over the achievement of something deeper and more virtuous. sometimes, when i learn something new through an experience, it comes with a kind of arrogant superiority. i have to resist this temptation and focus on “resume virtues” and instead shift my attention to the aspects of my life that truly matter, such as my faith and relationships with loved ones. finally, i believe that i am responsible for my actions and that i can learn and become more empathetic through them. these actions include how i behave towards others and myself. as chimamanda ngozi adichie states in her ted talk, “power is the ability not just to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person” ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau week seven). this line spoke to my root belief and has made me rethink how i talk and even think about others. while i was always taught from a young age to take responsibility for my actions, i never quite considered how much my assumptions could affect others. adichie explains that, just like stereotypes, single stories are not problematic because they are necessarily untrue--rather, because they are simply partial truths. they lack the nuance that life demands. i have noticed this particularly over the past few weeks as i have dealt with people who i had heard negative things about. however, after spending more time with them i realized that there truly are many sides to a person and that it is better to withhold judgement for as long as possible. empathy is critical when engaging with others because we all have different stories. along these lines of being responsible with my thoughts and actions, i also am reminded that “we cannot love the god who we do not see if we cannot love the brother that we do see” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau week five). i was reminded of this quote as i have been exploring my faith more here at notre dame. thus i find that the best way to further my relationship with god is to better my relationships with my friends and be as kind and compassionate to others as i can. referring back to chimamanda ngozi adichie’s talk, empathy is critical because we all do have different stories and so it is critical that we remember we are all individuals and not stereotypes others have made about us. ultimately, i believe that my purpose is to get as much out of life-in my education and relationships-as i can through my interaction with the rest of the world. over the past few years of my life, and the past couple months in particular, i have come to terms with the conflicting emotions that come with change, from discomfort to excitement. fundamentally, however, change is necessary for growth and is an unavoidable part of the human experience. in moreau week 6, i wrote my “i’m from” poem describing all of the places that formed me, from my grandparents’ small apartment on bleeker st. in greenwich village or to the catskills where i would build fairy houses (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau week six). these places and my experiences in them have turned me into the person i am today and remind me of my individuality. my goal is to do justice to the life i have been blessed with through careful examination of the world and compassionate interaction with those around me. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html week 13 integration two word count: 1541 words excluding quotes finding my happiness throughout this semester, i have learned many new things. i have learned new things in the most basic sense: in my classes. however, i have also learned things in a deeper sense; i have learned many new things about myself, my friends (both new and old), and about my environment. i think one of the most important questions that i’ve asked this semester is asking myself why i have always let people’s expectations for me control my life. growing up, i always let my parent’s expectations control my life. i know sometimes that is a very positive thing, but it got to the point where i was making myself miserable over it. i constantly was trying to live up to their expectations for me about grades, athletics, and friendships/relationships. throughout high school, this started to drain me because if i got anything less than an a, i would not be allowed out to see my friends, and i would feel guilty feeling proud of myself knowing that i had studied as hard as i possibly could and tried my absolute best because it wasn’t the result that my parents wanted and expected. i began to “believe that [i] must be perfect and that [i] must live up to the expectations of others (and [myself’)” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by grotto moreau fye week nine), which began to eat me up inside. the disappointment from my parents and from myself taunted me and made me feel like trying wasn’t even helping. coming here, i had a feeling that the same things would happen. however, when i got here, i realized that trying to live up to my parent’s expectations for me was an unhealthy way of life. i learned to be proud of myself for working and trying as hard as i can. i stopped sharing my grades with my parents, which is not something i necessarily enjoy keeping from them, but it is helping me grow and let go of their disappointment in me when i put in my best effort. of course, i still appreciate their input and disappointment when i know that i messed up or didn’t put my best effort into something. i also still care about my grades more than most people probably do, but not having my parents constantly having access to my grades has caused so much relief in my life. i still struggle with not meeting expectations for myself that i set and this quote from an article from week 9 explains it perfectly, “those expectations are the bars that we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite–that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by grotto moreau fye week nine). an example of my current struggle happened just a couple of days ago when i got my stat exam back. i felt very confident that i did exceptionally well on the exam. when i got the exam back, i did not get the score i expected, but i still did very well on the exam and actually still got an a. in the future, i am going to continue to work my best and try to accept the result whatever it is because i will know that i did my best. along the lines of expectations, i have also struggled with expectations held by people who i thought were my best friends. a lot of the girls at my high school ended up being some of the worst friends i have ever had. because of the toxic friendships and relationships i had all throughout high school and even some in grade school, i did not have high expectations for the friends i would make here. all of the rough friendships led me to not place much importance on friendship. instead, i placed lots of importance on family. however, my experiences here thus far have completely changed my view on the importance of friendship. the people i have met here are some of the most incredible people i have ever met, and for that, i am eternally grateful. towards the end of my senior year, i thought i had finally found the girls that would be my friends for life, and some of them certainly will be. however, the one girl who i considered my best friend ended up doing something so awful to me over the summer that it made me question if she was ever really my friend at all. she put me in the worst possible situation i could ever imagine, and that nearly destroyed my value of friendship because i could not and still cannot begin to understand why she did what she did. the other girls in our friend group had my back and defended me and still do to this day. seeing their continued love for me, despite me being at a different college than all of them and meeting the people i have met here has forever changed my view on friendship and the amount of importance that i place on pursuing healthy, loving, and true friendships and relationships, rather than expecting the types of relationships and friendships that i had in high school and before. here, it’s even more than just my immediate best friends that help me see the importance of friendship. it’s the university as a whole and the entire community that has formed. everyone cares about everyone else and is willing to help anyone, even a stranger on campus that they’ve never encountered before. “the most common connotation of the word ‘community’ in our culture is ‘intimacy,’ but this is a trap’ (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week eleven). i have my immediate community of best friends on campus, but i also have the whole campus community. i found the people that i know will be in my life forever, so i have found my own personal community, but i also have become a part of a much larger community: the entire notre dame community. although i may not form deep relationships with everyone in this large community, i know that i am part of it and belong here. i never had that feeling in my high school because most of the girls at my high school were focused on popularity and would put themselves first in any situation, no matter if it could hurt their “friends” in the process. i feel so lucky to experience the community and friendships that i have found and formed here because i know some people never find that. i now know and realize how much i need to understand the importance of friendships. as i move forward in my life, i am going to make an effort to reach out to some people who seem to be in the same position that i was and hopefully be the person that helps them realize how truly amazing and important it is to find your people and your community. realizing that the person who i thought was my best friend was a much easier task for me to handle compared to realizing that many people have been in the same position that i have been in and have experienced the same things i did as a result of what my friend did to me. what happened over the summer combined with losing the girl who i thought would stick by me through everything really broke my heart, and many amazing people, including some that i have met here have helped me move on and make myself better from the incident. i hated experiencing a broken heart, especially because it wasn’t the typical heartbreak, like a heartbreak over a boy. it was the heartbreak over losing my best friend and experiencing something traumatic all in the same time period. a quote from the video about kintsugi really struck me and helped realize that heartbreak shouldn’t be something bad or a sign of weakness, but rather it is something truly amazing that changes us for the better. she said, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable and it’s a very good thing that is worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). it has become clear to me over this semester that there really are so many people who share similar stories and memories, which comforts me because it creates the opportunity for a very special kind of relationship and bond to form. knowing i have found my people and that putting my heart back together are two things that make me happier than i could ever imagine. all my life, i have been taught to “make the best out of a bad situation” and that the tough experiences are just to make us stronger. i have also been told countless times that we need to learn from the tough times and to learn from our mistakes. however, the way c.s. lewis explains it in the screwtape letters struck me a little differently than anyone else ever has. she wrote “the dryness and dullness through which your patient is now going are not, as you fondly suppose, your workmanship; they are merely a natural phenomenon which will do us no good unless you make a good use of it” (““the screwtape letters” chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this quote helped me come to the conclusion that despite all the times i have been told to learn from the tough times and bad situations, making a good use out of a bad situation involves much more than just learning from it. it’s the whole experience that changes us as a person, and we need to use those changes for the betterment of ourselves. learning the things i have learned and finding the people i have found over this first semester at notre dame has brought me true happiness and a feeling of safety and comfort. i will take the lessons i have learned throughout my life, especially these last few months, with me wherever life takes me. although sometimes life can throw curveballs, i know now that these curveballs lead to some amazing things and create opportunities for growth and to find happiness we didn’t even know we were lacking. moreaux integration paper moreaux integration paper word count: 1148 why am i here? why am i here? this question is one that plagues my mind quite often, when i’m going to sleep, when i’m working on homework, when i’m walking from class to class, even when i’m surrounded by friends. this question is always in the back of my mind. i’m not necessarily asking in a bad sense, as in i do not wish to be here, but as shown from the survey from moreaux week 2, my strongest trait is curiosity, i question everything that can be questioned, and then some. i started asking myself this question starting at about 7th grade, i wondered, what was the point of this thing called life. was it really just to go through the motions of life, be an upstanding citizen, do as i’m told, and then die. i could not accept that. i knew there must be a purpose to why we are all here. one of the earliest answers that i found when looking for the answer to this rather broad question, was happiness. now this answer may be quite selfish and shallow, but i believed and to some extent still do believe, that life should be around living the happiest life possible. i thought that if something brought you happiness, then you might as well keep doing it, as that really is the goal of life, to make yourself as happy as possible. i lived like this for a while, but the things which brought me fleeting moments of happiness did not fulfill me for more than maybe a day or a week. i realized that i could not sustain myself on the way i was living. that is when i realized that there is a deeper form of happiness that one should strive for, and that is joy. joy can be found for so many different people, in so many different ways. i believe that everyone’s goal should be what brings them joy. the happiness and joy relationship, i’ve been enlightened to, is similar to living life for your resume versus your eulogy from week 2 (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?”-david brooksmoreaux week 2). happiness gives https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim your life meaning in that moment, however joy gives your life purpose and meaning for the rest of your life, and even in death. from my past couple of weeks at notre dame there have been several instances where i believe the difference between happiness and joy was made evident for me. one instance is the matter of faith. this one however is the most difficult for me to comprehend, as i know that a true love of god is the way to experience the deepest rooted joy, however i have not completely grasped it yet. this school and the little experiences like hall mass have inched me closer to understanding the joy of faith, however i still feel i have not yet fully grasped it. the second instance of joy i’ve found at this school is making a difference in others lives. for me, this source of joy is extremely important, because it is the reason i am on the path to become an engineer, and am in a lot of the activities that i’m involved with. for instance, our dorm has service saturdays, where we wake up at about 7 in the morning on game days and help organizations in the community that help the people of south bend. the act of service give me a gratification that no other activity does, knowing that i could be making a difference in someone else’s life is a fact that i live for. not only that but the community around service saturdays, with people who feel similar to me, has allowed me to meet some genuinely good people who i can be proud to call my friends. this service mindset also led me to stay on the engineering path, as in my classes, learning how i can use engineering for good, has me very excited for what i could do in the future. lastly, and probably the most relevant case of joy in my life, is surrounding myself with people. to be frank, i love and have always been fascinated with humanity and everyone apart of it. i love the ideas of friendship, comradery, and love of all kinds between people. meeting all the new people here at notre dame has solidified that fact. i have had the time of my life meeting and befriending the people of my dorm, in my classes, around campus, and just anyone i pass by. most of my joy stems from the people that i surround myself with. to follow my belief in living life for joy which is obtained by being close with others, i have needed to challenge myself in order to get deeper relationships with the people in my life. i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim had always had a strong group of friends in high school, but now surrounded by a completely new set of people, i am forced to step out of my comfort zone in order to get to know these new people in my life. i’ve had to take into consideration some of what brene brown explains in her ted talk on vulnerability from week one (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i need to love a wholehearted life where i am unafraid to put my heart on my sleeve. in order to truly connect with people, brown explains how vulnerability is almost a give in. without it, the connections just do not form. i must learn to put aside fear of not knowing the right thing to say at the right time, and delve into everyone i meet with passion and genuineness if i want to form a thriving relationship. once i am able to master living wholeheartedly my wish to help and bring others joy will be much more easily fulfilled. i have decided a couple things about why i am here, not just at notre dame, but on this earth in the journey of life. i am here to experience deep rooted joy. i am here to live a life i can be proud of, not only while i am living, but in death by the people i have impacted in my life. i am here to learn more about god, and hopefully gain a closer connection with him. i am here to serve others, and to lift others up through my actions. i am here to love others, no matter what or who they are. i have been placed here, at this specific place, at this specific point in history, to make a difference in the world, whether big or small, i do not know. but i am here in order to live a joyous life, filled with love for others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be the most basic of ideas that we should strive to obtain in order to live a well-lived life is the idea of betterment. this can come in many forms, as it involves both betterment of oneself but also the betterment of others. in my time as a first year at notre dame, i have come closer to the understanding that in order to make myself happier, it is best done by making others happy as well. my mission statement can be summed up with the fact that in the next 3 years, i want to use my skills and talents to better the lives of others, so that i can make a positive influence on the people around me. i believe that doing these things are the best way to approach a well-lived life. one of the ways that i think it is important to first consider these ideas is through the lens of religion. specifically, for me, i can connect to the idea that “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10). as a catholic myself, it is my responsibility to further these ideas, and one of the ways of doing that is to being respectful and inclusive of others. one of the best ways to make yourself feel happy about what you are doing in life is to be helpful towards others. feeling like you made a difference in someone’s life is one of the best ways of making yourself feel like your actions matter to others, especially when they are part of the change you can make. to do this, you must have a deep understanding of the desires and wants of the other side. this involves working with the other person in order to build a bond with one another. the best way of doing this is through accompaniment, which “reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that “over there” and “here” are intertwined. the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). it gives the proper idea that instead of trying to change the way of life of someone else, you want to uplift their way of life. what makes this so rewarding is that you feel like you can really, truly make a positive change in the lives of others, because you understand the other person’s needs and can appropriately respond to them. “how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week 7). it is important to not get ahead of ourselves when thinking about where we should be focusing our attention and remember that it is those around us who sometimes need the most help. at a very basic level, something i consider very important to life is making sure everyone feels welcome. to do this, we must understand that it is something that everyone can be involved in. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school – moreau fye week 12). something i have always been interested in is being active in the community through service, which can work towards this goal. one specific example of working with the community through service was when i did my eagle scout project, where my mom recounts that “one time when he demonstrated exceptional leadership was he was running his eagle scout project. at that time, he was managing the adults, even those who were off-task. he was leading everyone, including kids and adults. despite it being complicated and difficult, he was respectful, this episode showed that he was still a good leader despite the obstacles that came at my way, and that he was still able to demonstrate my best self. – (reflection done with my mom – moreau fye week 5). doing service work and being a leader also gives one satisfaction because empowering others to work with you towards a positive end goal makes you feel like you make a difference in the lives of not only the people you are helping, but also helping those who are working with you understand what it is that they can do to help others. many times, everyone won’t agree with you when you are speaking about something. the most important thing in those cases is to believe in your own beliefs, and despite others maybe not agreeing with you, staying strong. fr. hesburgh “spoke extensively about breaking barriers, and overcoming the expectations that people have of you in order to improve the world around you.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). it is with this simple recommendation that we can understand the idea that we should have about how we should remain strong in our ideas which can help people improve their lives, and despite others not agreeing with us, it important that we can commit to our beliefs, and not back down in the face of opposition. this is one of the best traits that makes a good leader. in general, one of the best ways of living a well-lived life is having an understanding of the world around you. often times, being too focused on something can limit our perspectives and ideas that we can consider, which is of course a detriment to our ability to have a positive influence on society. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). being able to take a step back from the business that surrounds our daily lives will allow us to see what is going on around us more clearly. however, doing this too much can cause problems because it makes us so focused on other things that we get distracted. “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). being able to find the right balance is what makes us able to contribute to society in the most effective manner. this is especially relevant in the world of politics because many times, the disagreements that start between people are due to politics. to have an adequate understanding of opposing points of view, you must be able to consider where their point of view is coming from. “we live in a 24/7 cycle of political news that saturates every corner of our culture. it seems like this has led to increased engagement in politics, but eitan hersh says that engagement with politics for many of us has actually become more shallow.” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week 11). because of this crazy world of politics, often we forget that many times, people have a reason for the beliefs they have. in order to further our connections with other people, we have to first understand where they are getting their beliefs from, and that is the first step to being able to make relations with them. at the end of the day, the difference between simply helping ourselves and helping others as well is the difference between satisfaction and joy. with satisfaction, this comes when we are only helping ourselves. “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). joy comes from seeing other people be happy as well. i think that true joy cannot simply come from oneself, it also has to come from other people as well. being able to see the joy on others after you have helped them in some way is one of the best feelings that anyone can have. that is why i want to focus on living my well lived life in a way where i can help others so that i can make them feel joy. as i have mentioned many times before, it is the relationships that you build with others that create the core of who we are. doing that in a positive and effective way is the best way to live a well-lived life. the reasons i am worthy of beauty this semester has been an absolute culture shock for me, i started in the summer and had no idea what i was getting myself into at the time. i was coming from a background that had no religious affiliation, i was baptized christian but that is all i know. me and my family never went to church, we never took time to talk about good when i was growing up, and so coming here and talking about god in my classes and with my classmates was a complete three-sixty for me. i felt so out of place and alone, like i was the only person in my class that did not grow up with some kind of background in religion. in the video in “what is imposter syndrome?” there was something very particulars that resonated with me during my time here and that is the part where dr. pauline rose clance, studies these groups of undergraduate students who feel like they do not deserve the accomplishments they are receiving. this was when i realized i had experienced the same imposter syndrome that those students have and that the feeling was not abnormal and it helped me to realize that i did in fact deserve the accomplishments that i got, they may not be the same as my classmates, or my test scores my not be as high but the accomplishments were still very much real and mine. (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). i came here for school yes but i only got here because of baseball, if it were not for sports i would not be here typing this integration 2 assignment. however as the semester went on and as classes continued i realized that this place is more than just a private catholic school. this class moreau allowed me to be able to realize that just because no one is saying how they feel it does not mean they aren’t feeling the same. this week nine helped me to realize that there are going to be times in my life where i feel like i do not deserve what is happening to me, but to always take one step back and realize that it is okay to feel that way, but not to be so hard on myself all the time and to accept that i do deserve the good things that happen to me, and that i do belong even if you may feel a little out of place. also, the conversations that we would have in class made me realize that i was not alone in these feelings and that there are others who feel just as vulnerable as i do sometimes, which is a very comforting fact to know that i am not in this alone. after coming to college i was in a relationship with now my ex. but we had it planned about how we were going to make this whole long distance situation work, and to my surprise she realized that she did not want anything to do with me now that we had this distance between us and left me. i was hurt so bad on the inside, not only did she leave me she texted me all of it after a 3 year long relationship she texted me that we were breaking up. i held on to this pain for quite some time and did not know how to go through the day without breaking out in tears. each class was a mountain to climb constantly being distracted by my thoughts of her and me. however i learned so very interesting things from watching the kintsugi video. this video was teaching women that just because you are broken now does not mean that you can’t put yourself back together even more beautiful than you were before. each crack on a plate was unique and each crack was fixed with gold that made it beautifully unique and everyone’s was different. kristen taught these women to accept their brokenness and that it is okay to be broken but that does not mean it is unfixable, nor does it mean that it is not beautiful. artists kirsten helgeson says that kintsugi shows that the piece is more beautiful now that it is broken. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto) by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). this helped me to realize that i may be broken but i am still beautiful in my own way and it helped me to realize the positive things in the situation. i will now be able to not only come back to this when i feel broken but be able to help others realize they are more unique and beautiful for being broken and that they can be fixed. during my time here at notre dame i have found some of the most genuine and loyal people i have ever met and this has caused me to think about times when i used to meet people and be so caught in my ways that i would never give them the time of day. while i was growing up i never got to experience a very diverse community until i got to college. i never really understood why i got treated differently in middle school and elementary school and that i would also get picked on if i won a race or beat someone in a sport, because i was a black kid and naturally gifted. or why some teachers thought that i would be bad just because of how i looked i never knew why but professor agustin fuentes mentions a statistic that explains my situation pretty well. he stated that two ipods were posted to be sold one had a white hand holding the ipod and one had a black hand holding the ipod, the ipod that was held by the white hand got 21 more bids ( “diversity matters” by professor agustin fuentez moreau fye week 11). this made me feel like it was my fault and that because of the color of my skin i was in the wrong, but that is not true. our discussions in class showed me that i am good and that i do belong and that i just was not around the right people. this week taught me to be vulnerable and meet new people because here i am accepted, i feel a sense of community that i have never felt before. i will now be better able to identify those who are really there for me because of the people that i have now been exposed to at notre dame. i think during my time here at notre dame hope seems to stem from faith. since i do not have a faith background my version of hope lies within myself. i think of hope as goals that you have too work at to make happen. i do not see hope as something you wish for yet do nothing to achieve. sometimes i think that version of hope can actually be a down fall for many and lead to people doing nothing when they should be doing everything to create the life they want. i think hope is a necessity in life but i think that if you hope to much and rely on a transcendental to make it happen for your then you’re missing out because i think hope motivates me and others too become better and more complete. hope shouldn’t be based on having faith, i think faith can add another layer to hope, but do not think that it should solely be base on hope. in the screwtape letters my point is shown that because of hope the people get screwed over they trust and believe people they should not because hope has lead them to that. it is how easy it is to be deceived when you have this mindset of hope that leads to stagnant movement. (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). this showed me that it is okay to have hope, but do not let that run your life, and to always believe someone with casusion and do not just hope what they are saying is true. i have encountered many things so far with my journey here at notre dame. brokenness, dissonances, heartbreak, belonging, feelings connected. i have responded to all of these things with one goal in mind and that is too be able to look back on this time in my life and not regret any decision that i have made, it means that i need to become more in tune with my thoughts and not act out of emotion, and it means that i need to better understand myself and what i want out of myself and my circle. not only have i responded so that i wont regret these actions in the future, i have responded in ways that are true to myself and without trying to please the minds of others. integration 2 fighting family expectations and increasing importance of community people's perspectives, opinions, and values all change throughout the course of their life. this is especially true during one's teenage years as we begin to discover who we are and as our individual personalities begin to take shape. new experiences, such as beginning college and living away from home, are often pivotal moments in our lives and are times of great personal development. for me during this first semester, i have encountered challenging my family's beliefs about what i should major in, as well as seen an increase in the importance of community. during the summer while creating my class schedule i knew i had wanted to take a math class, even though it was not required for my major, just because i enjoyed my math classes in high school. towards the middle of the semester, my math class became one of the classes i had enjoyed the most in my schedule, and i saw my love for math grow through it. this sparked the idea of possibly switching my major from pre-professional studies to mathematics or applied and computational mathematics and statistics (acms). however, when i told my family about this idea, they were very against it and asked what i would even be able to do with a degree in math. at first i thought, they’re probably right, i should stick to my pre-professional major. however, even though i do also have a love of science, the idea of completely abandoning math still did not sit right with me. as class registration for the spring semester was coming up, i needed to decide if i was going to continue my path with math and add a math class to my schedule or abandon it and take a different class instead. while deliberating this, i realized that the only reason i would want to abandon math is because of my family’s opinions. this reminded me of the grotto article about expectations which said “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). that is when i asked myself “what do i want to do? what will make me happy?” i stopped thinking about my family’s opinions and started thinking about what i want to do with my life and how i wanted to balance my love of both math and science. ultimately, i decided to keep my main major as pre-professional but also work towards a supplementary major in math or acms. although this isn’t completely challenging my family’s wishes of me getting a degree in science, it was one of the first times i began to think about what i wanted to do without relying on their opinions. i feel like this will be an important thing for me to do in the future. i want to live life for myself rather than trying to make others happy and not enjoying what i do in life, even if that means making decisions others may not completely support. another thing that i have encountered is an increase in the importance of community. although community was somewhat important to me at home, the community at notre dame is more tight knit and i feel like a more integral part of it. whether it be the community in the dorms, the classroom, or the campus as a whole, you can always feel the sense of community around you, and it even extends across the united states and internationally. through my efforts to be more involved in my community by engaging more with the people around me and the discussions in my classes, i began to learn more about different perspectives, especially on social issues and how they impacted the people around me. a big issue that is often brought to light is race. one idea mentioned in the 2020 snapshot video is the fact that when talking about race, society often tries to fit all races on a spectrum between black and white, when in reality they cannot all be grouped together so nicely (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven). this idea reminded me of a discussion in my university seminar. we were discussing the history of different latin american groups, and even within the hispanic community, the backstories and experiences people had varied significantly. sadly, most of the time society tries to force people into broad categories which often do not encompass the full diversity of the people they represent. i did not realize how prevalent of an issue colorism was, even within one's own ethnicity, until some of the discussions i had in my university seminar. the growth in my awareness about different issues such as racism and colorism have encouraged me to continue to get more involved in my community. my next goal is to become more involved not just with my peers and in my classes, but with staff and professors as well. racial injustice is another issue that often comes up when discussing race. in recent years, there has been an increase in attention and media coverage of issues such as police brutality and systemic racism. issues such as these and other dividing issues are mentioned by father jenkins in his commencement speech. he states “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). having racial diversity creates the opportunity to see and hear many different perspectives, but also inevitably leads to clashing perspectives. however, it is important to be able to discuss these differing viewpoints in a safe and respectful way rather than a scornful way. this is one thing i have encountered that i believe makes notre dame such a strong community. there are many different backgrounds that the students and faculty come from, and many different perspectives to hear and learn from. furthermore, the discussions in class are conducted in a respectful manner in which everyone is free to voice their opinions. although this is true most of the time, there are still some instances where this is untrue, and there may be some scornful comments about race or actions towards someone of a certain race made. i believe as a community we must work toward eliminating these instances as much as possible in order to create a community where everyone can thrive, and as a member of the community i try to do my part in this to the best of my ability. finally, the increased sense of community at notre dame has taught me that i can learn from anyone. learning does not only have to come from professors or staff members, but it can be from everyone around you. as father king puts it in his explanation of a holy cross education, we “are better disciples when humble enough to admit that we have a lot to learn from students and co-workers of all ages” (“holy cross and christian educations” by father james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). for me, this quote reminded me to be open to learning from those who are younger than me, more specifically, from the kids i volunteer with. i spend a couple of hours a week at la casa de amistad helping kids with their homework, and although i am there to help them learn, i also have a lot to learn from them. volunteering with the kids has taught me that not every strategy works for everyone, and sometimes you just need to find your own way of thinking about things that makes sense to you. it has also taught me that sometimes you cannot handle certain situations by yourself and that it is ok to ask for help from someone. these lessons and the importance of being open to learning from anyone around you are things that i hope to carry with me into future experiences, whether this be continuing volunteering or in my professional life. roemer moreau integration not your average dan i believe that i am not afraid to be vulnerable. as dr. brené brown discussed in her tedtalk, you have to believe you are worthy of love and belonging to have a strong sense of love and belonging, which means being vulnerable. i actually enjoyed dr. brown’s emphasis on vulnerability, something i believe to be a criminally overlooked virtue. by living with vulnerability and overcoming the fear that you aren’t worthy of other people’s affection, you are allowing yourself to be loved, connected and ultimately happy. this point particularly resonated with me, as showing vulnerability is something that i struggled with growing up (and still do at times). in fact, two things in my life have strongly encouraged me to be vulnerable: my cousin and my section at notre dame. my cousin battled depression and anxiety his whole life, and unfortunately took his own life during covid-19. now, his family advocates through an organization to encourage the discussion of depression and discouraging keeping emotions inside. furthermore, when i arrived at notre dame, within the first few weeks, our section adopted a white board in our hallway that tracked everyone’s mood. this was completely voluntary, but made it so much easier to discuss the tough parts of the day rather than a quick 5-second conversation that doesn’t mean anything. citation: (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i believe that i focus on my ‘eulogy’ qualities over my ‘resumé’ qualities. when i was going through the college process, a process that encourages ‘resumé’ qualities such as leadership positions, i focused on my ‘eulogy’ qualities first. funny enough, this actually made my resumé look great, but what i sadly realized is that my generation is so focused on their resumé that they don’t figure out what they are passionate about. in fact, i thought it was interesting how brooks pointed out basically the entire education system in the united states. both public and private schools emphasized results over progress. they tell you this: you have to get good grades to get a good resumé to go to a good college to get a good job. but they never focus on the whole individual. they typically ignore morals beyond ‘no bullying’ or ‘treat others as you would yourself’ and rarely celebrate true moral behavior. perhaps that’s just my pessimistic bias with the education system talking, but i do believe there is a large amount of truth in this. citation: (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two) i believe that i view everyone through the same lens. i really love the analogy that professor david fagerberg makes here. essentially, he says that when the lighting is the same inside and out, we see the world as it is. however, if it’s light inside and dark outside, then we lose sight of the world around us. similarly, if we observe something we are unfamiliar with (other cultures, traditions, religions, etc) in our own perspective (light), then we are likely to misunderstand it. in fact, we tend to go back to our own experiences and perspectives when this happens. simply by viewing something in a different light, he argues, we can acknowledge the beauty and reality of the world. this is the way i was brought up by my parents. i was taught to understand that other people have different beliefs and that that was okay. citation: (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three) i believe that i surround myself with good friends. typically, i am a very good judge of character, likely because my mom always gossiped to me about her friends and/or family. she has a good moral compass, so as a result, i also developed the ability to find true friends as opposed to toxic ones. in the grotto article, one of the signs of a toxic friend is that they only talk about negative things. that is, they are constantly venting about themselves without asking about you. i have been in numerous relationships, friend or otherwise, where i felt like i was putting in much more effort than the other person. i would ask them about their day, and they wouldn’t ask about mine. small things like that that really bothered me. i’ve learned to recognize this and try to find people that want to give as much as they take in a relationship. citation: (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) i believe that i am very optimistic, even when things get tough. the phrase, “vita cedo dulspes,” appears on our notre dame diplomas and especially resonates with me, as i tend to live my life in the same manner. i like to remember that no matter how bad things get, it can and will always get better. this is a very comforting reminder when things seem to be going poorly. emphasized in father kevin grove’s speech, you can rely on your family (both notre dame family and otherwise) to help you through this. this is something that i think is so important in dorm life, and life beyond as well. like i mentioned earlier, my section has a whiteboard on our floor that tracks our moods on a line graph, and anytime someone is really down, we know very soon so that we can ask them what’s going on in their life that’s bogging them down. overall, this is a very appropriate motto on the notre dame diploma. citation: (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove c.s.c moreau fye week five) i believe that i am very informed and do not draw stereotypes. in high school, my friends came from very different backgrounds, so i’ve learned to be very open to other cultures and not draw generalizations. at first, i was a little presumptuous when it came to their lifestyles, but i quickly learned that i know so little about other cultures. the same phenomenon was explored in chimamanda ngozi adiche’s tedtalk. it truly highlights the major issues with news media and racism in the u.s. today. even though most people are not racist, the way they experienced the world has made them subconsciously avert other cultures. this may also be due to the natural tendency of humans to be uncomfortable with things that are different to them, but it definitely sheds more of a light on how our culture is so self-centered. it does not foster other cultures to allow them to thrive, but overpowers them, even if that is not the goal. overall, adichie’s perspective is only one of many in the country, and something i still have to strive for many years. citation: (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozie adichie moreau fye week 7) moreau 11/29/21 integration two climate of change during the past few weeks of moreau we have been challenged to reflect on the challenges that we have faced thus far this year and analyzed how we have responded to these challenges. one of the most important things that i have learned as we near the end of the first semester and reflect is that many of the things that i tried to predict and control are often the things that i cannot predict and control. after coming out of high school, i felt like i had everything under control. i had just gotten into my top school, i had a great group of friends, and i had a lot of free time to do the things that i wanted to do. although i was very comfortable with high school, i still felt like i was ready to move onto college. although it had taken a while for me to find my place at my high school, almost three years, i felt that i was more than ready to face anything college threw at me. i figured that many of the same things that i faced in high school would be the same challenges that i faced in college. as a result, i felt completely comfortable tackling these problems such as making new friends. similar to the reflection in week 9, “i had been a pretty social person in high school and i fully expected to make great friends right away when i got to college” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” julia hogan moreau week 9). however, very similar to high school, i had trouble getting to know my fellow classmates. there were a lot of people that i had met in the beginning of school but not too many people that i would have really considered good friends. for the first few weeks i hung around a few guys but ultimately knew that unfortunately these were not people i felt comfortable around. although they were all very nice people, we had different expectations for college. my view of college as a strong balance between the classic work hard, play hard motto, conflicted heavily with a lot of their school first mentality and made for a lot of boring weekends. although i didn’t want to give up the friends that i had already made, i knew that i needed to push myself to get to know other people. although this is still an ongoing process, i am happy with the way i’ve responded to a unique challenge in college this far. although i expected the challenge to be very similar to high school, where it simply took me a long time to get to know the people who would eventually become my friends, this challenge was unique because i needed to push myself to meet new people. one of the additional challenges that i faced during this semester was a failure to recognize that college was a time of personal growth. before leaving for college, my high school friends and i joked that we had already fully developed as people and were not going to change at all during college. although we all said this sarcastically, i feel as though i may have taken it a bit too seriously. in high school, one of the things that prevented me from really feeling like i fit in was my inability to be vulnerable around new people. likewise, the same thing happened here at college. i’ve found that i’m continuing to close myself off to new people. although i know that vulnerability is necessary to make better connections to those around me, i’ve had trouble opening up. i’ve developed the expectation that others will open up to me first but so far this hasn’t really been true. this challenge is similar to week 10’s message where father jenkin’s stated that “most everyone would prefer there was less hatred in the world, yet there seems to be more — which is indirect proof that no one apparently wants to give up any of their own” (wesley theological seminary commencementfather jenkins moreau week 10). i kept expecting other people to change and never turned inward to see what i was doing wrong. i think one of the most important things so far has been recognizing this which will help me to be more vulnerable going forward. another one of the challenges that i wanted to take on while coming to notre dame was to encounter a more diverse group of people. whether that is people or different beliefs, i wanted to expand my horizons. one of the ways that i’ve addressed this challenge is by forcing myself into conversations with people i may not agree with. just like in week 11, i found that “hard experiences… are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer moreau week 11). i have found that the difficult conversations that i have had with people around me have actually brought me closer to them. the last challenge that i’ve really focused on while in college is my faith. while in college, it's easy to lose your faith as you are no longer required by anyone to keep going to mass or pray. however, as we are reminded in week 12 “a christian is compelled then to be zealous for union with god and direct his or her thoughts and actions accordingly” (holy cross and christian education james b. king moreau week 12). by surrounding myself with people who share this goal with me, i’ve found that it serves as a support system to encourage me to stay faithful. i’ve also learned that my faith is not only expressed by going to mass and praying but also through the individual daily actions that we do. one of the things that i’ve tried to do, although simple, is just asking “what would jesus do”. during the first semester, i’ve had a lot of difficult decisions to make, but taking time to sit back and think has helped me stay aligned. abigail moore bryan reaume moreau fye november 27, 2021 i doubt; i isolate; i hope. “look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). senior year of high school this simple advice took over my mind. the “options out there for living life” are strictly defined in universities’ demographics, statistics, and desperate recruiting emails. applying to college, i was trying to academically sell myself to schools, and ultimately ways of living life, without really knowing the goods i was selling or whom i was selling to. i felt lost and certainly not “called.” indecision has skewered my existence since i was a child walking and re-walking through gas station minimart aisles analyzing which candy i ought to bring up to the register as my father yelled that he’ll leave without me if i don’t pick one soon. because i spend so much critical time debating the best course of action—be it a road trip snack or what i want to do with my life—i never know if i’ve made the right call. i know my reasons, but i’ve lost sight of my desire. being conscious of this trend only makes me more indecisive because i know i won’t end up happy with my choice. in high school i wasn’t better at one subject over another and no steam-engine passion lead me. there are a hundred reasons why i chose notre dame in the end, but i still question whether this path for living life is one i am called to. on top of my justifications for why i’m at this school and in this class lies a sleeping dragon doubt—i am only here because it’s the “best” school i got into. because i don’t trust my own judgement, did i relinquish my choice to the masses and their objective ratings? fr. john jenkins in his commencement speech for wesley seminary stated, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten). when i apply to this to my freshman experience, i can’t help but ask did i push back? my mom called my grandpa with squirrely excitement when i got in. my grandpa, when he visited me this semester, told me twice how every boy in his kindergarten class dreamed they would play football for the fighting irish one day. i wonder whether i chose to notre dame to fulfill their dream or demands. i even got into a far better acclaimed architecture program, but i opted for notre dame’s. am i giving my life for my parents’ and a 1940s kindergarten classroom’s fantasy rather than realizing my own? these doubts that i have encountered are emphasized by the community i’m met with here. the notre dame students are not exactly my kind of people although many are kind people. on my birthday last week, i ubered to a coffee shop alone to do homework as a present to myself. when i sat down in the car, my driver said, “well, you’re easy to spot. you stand out on the curb there—don’t look like the other notre dame girls.” i laughed and agreed. i guess it really is that obvious. i’ve been alone, outside of my classes, this whole semester. although i’ve enjoyed the solitude immensely, i know that having friends and participating in a community is richer and more fun. there are always walls between me and new people that i don’t know how to break. they make me believe that others can’t see me, can’t know me. when i ought to be “penetrating the illusion of separateness and touching the reality of interdependence,” i am enforcing the illusion instead (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). in some ways i am glad i am different from my peers because it gives me a clear sense of my own identity. i am not washed out by being indistinct. however, my independent identity doesn’t negate my need for interdependent connection. if i had gone to a school with people who love backpacking and music by artists no one has heard of, maybe i would see fewer walls between me and those peers. yet, i have not only encounter doubt and separation. however much i like to convince myself i’m drifting as an unrecognized plastic product in a uniform sea, when i left for camping one weekend (without letting my roommate know by accident), i was bombarded by texts and missed calls from my roommate, ra, and rector as soon as i reentered service. i felt terribly guilty for troubling them, but they also showed me that, whether i’ll accept it or not, there is a community i am now connected to. there are people watching out for me, and i have a responsibility to them. yes, they were mostly just doing their jobs, but it made me realize that i have chosen this community to be a part of it not to observe it closely and hope i slip through its cracks unnoticed. whether the decision to attend notre dame was initially out of familial pressure, a generalized ranking, or a passive giving up of my choice at the end of the day i am here. i would regret leaving knowing that i did not let myself receive this community—that i did not see how it would change me through to the end. i do not want to give up on notre dame just because i could have gone somewhere with people more like who i am. i came to notre dame to find the person i want to become. the hope i have for myself is that i learn “to look out upon the world like the awestruck shepherds who gazed in wonder at mary’s newborn son and, during more difficult times, to emulate the friends who stood by her decades later as she stared at his cross willing herself to trust in god’s promise” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame – moreau fye week 12). this is the holy cross education’s hope as well. although i might question my sanity leaving the california climate and year-round access to mountain trails and ocean waves, i hunger to be challenged. i cannot discredit my peers before i know them, my choice before i’ve lived it. that notre dame students are different from me means i have much i can learn about them—i have much to learn from them. i will continue to doubt myself, as i first stated it is part of my condition, but i will leave my heart open to this place so that it might call me. integration 2-2.pdf moreau integration 2 12/6/12 finding belonging through shared experiences some of the most important questions i have asked myself this semester are how do i stay true to myself in stressful times, how can i learn from both toxic and healthy relationships and grow from them, and how can we overcome our feelings of imposter syndrome. through my first semester here at notre dame i believe that i have learned a lot from my first initial experiences with college and i can now answer these questions and make a benefit to myself. another thing i have learned from the first semester here at notre dame is that some things don't need to be stressed about. since i have been here i have learned that some things will come easier than they seem. before coming here, the whole college experience seemed “black and white” to me because i have never really experienced it yet, but now that i am here, everything seems more ambiguous. my life changed when i came here and i believe it has changed for the better. i have been through the hard parts and i have learned to live on my own and maintain academics, athletics, friendships, and basic life chores. as soon as i stepped foot on campus my emotions were all over the palace. i had feelings of excitement, nervousness, gratitude, fear, doubt, and confidence all at once. i remember our first sunday class we had was moreau first year experience. i honestly didn't know what to expect from it. but i remember getting to know all these different people who have also just moved onto campus for the first time, and were experiencing the same emotions i was. during week 11 in moreau we spoke about community. in one of the articles we read, it states “hard experiences are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing.” (“13 ways of looking at community'' by parker j palmer moreau fye week 11). this quote really embodies the emotions i was feeling during those first few days on campus. it was extremely difficult leaving my home and my sister and my parents and family, but even though it was a difficult thing to do, i have adjusted to it and i feel that now i have more of an appreciation towards home and my family. the appreciation feels much stronger now because i now believe that being away and learning on your own is good for me as a person mentaly and to grow and expand my experiences and community, and it has made me miss home. now when i go home from school on breaks and for holidays, it makes my experience home extra special because you spend true quality time with the people who you love but don't see everyday. this ties back to community as well because being at school is a new experience with community for me, and sharing something in common with all the other first year students here coming not only from different states and areas, but also from different religions, backgrounds, and ethnicities. it creates an even stronger sense of community within shared experiences. after getting here to notre dame a fear that i had was trying to make new friends. now i have found that after my first semester here, it wasn't something that needed to be stressed about very much. i have seen that it was not only me who was worried about meeting new people and making new friends, it was everyone around me. the amount of events and activities held on campus made it easy for you to meet new people. also, being in a dorm was a way to naturally make new friends because it creates a new family environment for everyone that we were thrown into. during week 9 in moreau we talked about encountering brokenness. the main theme of this week's topic was “imposter syndrome”. in the video we watched for our qqc, a quote that was said that stood out to me was “everyone is susceptible to a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fys week 9). this quote stood out to me because i have experienced imposter syndrome without actually knowing the proper term for it. this syndrome is very common in people, and it is normally for people to feel this way. the way to overcome this feeling is to talk about it and be open to your friends and peers about the way you are feeling and it creates less tension for yourself. after learning about this, i spoke to my friends about it and it helped me because they also could relate to it because they share the same experiences. it is also important to be mindful to others because you don't know how they are feeling and they may feel overwhelmed in some situations so being kind and forgiving is a good way to approach people who seem uneasy to these topics. during the summer before coming here, thinking about the whole college experience seemed “black and white” to me. i had completed high school and was getting ready to move onto the next chapter of my life. i didt really know what to expect. i knew it was going to be difficult with my classes, and sports, adjusting to the new environment, and being away from home and family. after adjusting here, everything became more ambiguous and complicated. things were difficult and stange t adjust to at first but then i eventually got used to it. something i did expect when i got here was that i was going to succeed and i was hopeful that things were going to turn out the way they were supposed to. during week 12, we spoke about hope. a quote from one of the articles we read that was meaningful to me was, “it is a vision that takes young people from their earliest days of grappling with ideas and making sense of the world around them to preparing them for lifelong discipleship in a supportive environment that nourishes their gifts and fuels their desire for god'' (''holy cross and christian education'' by james b. kingmoreau fys week 12). for us teenagers, sometimes it can be difficult or challenging for us to know which is the correct path for us. we are still trying to navigate through a new chapter in our lives, while still having to figure out what we want our future to look like. all this stress can become overwhelming, and it is important to check in with ourselves and our peers for guidance and hope that we will strive to become the best versions of ourselves. something that was ambiguous that now holds greater meaning is the importance of self love and acceptance. during week 10 we learned the importance of rebuilding ourselves. in the video we watched, they did an activity of smashing a bowl or mug and rebuilt it into its original state again. they used gold paint to put these things back together (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto -moreau fys week 10). this activity symbolized that the brokenness and hurt that each individual has been through can be fixed. the “scars'' from a person's life are represented by the gold paint that was used to put the thing back together. even though it didn't look perfect, it has significance, meaning, and beauty to it. robert corrato 10/15/21 moreau fye taylor kelly integrating vicariously through myself before coming to a school with extremely passionate and outright wonderful people, places, and things such as the university of notre dame, my further extensive thoughts about my reality, certain choices, and my past experiences weren’t necessarily the strongest. by this, i am trying to convey how i didn’t think enough about myself. i know, this sounds incredibly selfless, as if not every person in the world is secretly self centered, yet, coming from a school with the same people for roughly ten years, change wasn’t a big option for me. this self knowledge that my moreau first year experience has taught me to elaborate on brought forth new ideas and new trains of thought to think about through my past and present experiences while either at home or at college. the combination of living far, far away from home (for me), on my own, while attending classes every day has allowed me to narrow myself out through much more self reflection than i ever had before. my “root beliefs” reflected in all of my moreau weekly qqc’s and my even stronger growth in the personal belief in catholicism has provided me with the necessary time to understand myself. now, let me explain. one of my first root beliefs is directly resulted from what college is all about, making those life-long lasting connections and friendships. i believe that i am searching for life-long relationships. i have been very fortunate to meet people such as my roommates and many other friends in the gateway program at holy cross college. i wrote my first qqc assignment on exactly this. opening up is difficult, especially to those you met quite literally two weeks before going to school. as a part of my summer, many gateway kids on the east coast decided to connect along the jersey shore for a beach weekend, mostly for everyone to have a great time meeting some of your friends that will be with you through thick and thin. that weekend, quite literally, defined exactly who i wanted to be with. this time meeting peter o’connor (roommate), matt mcmanus, liam redmond, and michael manning allowed me to be extremely vulnerable about a situation i felt very uncomfortable to touch on with my friends from home. i opened up, and at first, i felt like the words of brene brown “vulnerability is the core of shame, fear, and the struggle for worthiness” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). during this, i was going through an incredibly toxic point in my life. no, not toxic like a disease or chemical, but the relationship connotation. to keep it short, this girl treated me so poorly and i couldn't let go of “pure love”. thank goodness i am so far away from her now, for the unfortunate event of stopping all contact with her happened and the distance only helps. these boys, who i haven’t known for a full semester, proved that they weren't “a friend who uses you may treat you like a therapist but never ask about how you’re doing.” (“5 signs you are in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). coming to the aid of someone you barely know is something that takes a lot of patience along with so much trust, trust i didn’t even have in some of the people i went to school with my whole life. i put my confidence in the university of notre dame to select the people who i will spend a majority of my life with, and i wouldn’t trade their decision for the world. being at the greatest catholic university in the world, i was completely overtaken by the amount of actual catholicism practiced here. i am a catholic, i grew up and was raised catholic, but i went to an episcopal school all my life. going into the application process, i knew exactly what i was getting into and as of right now, it was exactly what i wanted to do. i believe that one of my purposes at nd is to grow my base with religion and gain experience talking to god. as said from the words of father pete, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought.” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick moreau fye week three). through my nineteen years on this earth, these past two months have been by far the most diverse, compelling, and overall fun experience of my life. consistently speaking to god, going to the grotto every night if i can, and attending mass in different halls every sunday. my first time entering moreau class in the coleman morse center, i was completely overcome by the spirituality in that very building. my experiences in that building are going to push me to do some type of campus ministry, whether it's in my residence hall or not. along with learning more and more about myself through catholicism, learning about myself while being thrown into a new environment is just as important. living on my own with no parietal constraint was something i was worried about before i arrived on campus the week of august 23rd. growing up in an italian household with strict rules about my academics and what i could and couldn’t do, being my own ruler wasn’t much of a challenge. not only at notre dame, but all kids in college find themselves overdoing it, causing them to struggle in their classes. the students who do this make me question how they “not only build and grow while being true to your values” ( should you live for your resume or your eulogy? david brooks moreau fye week two) all this growth so many of my peers are making is just becoming drowned out on the weekends. there are times like this that i am so extremely thankful for my family. having the good morals passed down from generation to generation in the corrato/diprinzio family is something i am beyond grateful for. words cannot describe how many times i was told to “not do this” or “not do that”. at times, i even felt shielded from some true realities of the world. i am not just realizing this, but it causes me to question if it was for the better. during our week “6” moreau assignment, we had to write a similar work based off of the poem “where i am from” by george ella lyon. the time i had to myself when i sat down and began writing reminded me of doing my homework in my grandparents house, next to them thiddliling away at the sewing machines. in my poem, i wrote, “the doorframe, cracked in sections, still holds together the crucifix above thee, the window above the fireplace still holds the same vases of shriveled plants i grew up staring at.” (where i am from robert corrato moreau fye week “6”) something my parents were taught by my grandparents and so on was resilience. being resilient is something that wasn’t taught, it was automatically expected. coming from immigrant grandparents, who came to the united states with five dollars to their name, “held up” a family of three girls not knowing any english. that is what i qualify as resilience. as our roles change person to person in our family, i understand that my quality of resilience now is to try my best in school, never give up, follow your dreams, and be a just leader. apart from resilience, being true to oneself and finding your truths of life is another core value that both my grandparents and parents taught me. finding truth is something i define similarly to finding your passion, or your purpose in your life on earth. as of right now, my truth is to graduate from notre dame along with the tools i need to operate successfully in the adult world. in that world, i believe that i want to drastically diversify myself, learning as much as possible about other people and other cultures. living amongst those who are similar to you is something that i’ve been doing all my life. the furthest i have been out of that zone in which i call home was during my sophomore year service trip to haiti. our partner school, st. marc’s, is another episcopal parish that provided me with a new sight i never expected to live through. during my week 7 moreau qqc, i asked the question, “how can someone prevent “the buy-in” to differing cultures through the media?” (how to think about ‘implicit bias’” keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american robert corrato moreau fye week “7”) the inventions of smartphones and computers that are able to compute and share media across the world in a blink of an eye. with this great power, it is important to not judge, while not implicating any harm to any being, something most would say proudly. during my time here, traveling for a semester abroad is going to be one of my greatest memories. it hasn’t happened yet, but i promise, i can sense it. the stories that will shape my journey are right in front of me waiting to be read. in the words of father sorin, “man proposes but god disposes” (father sorin to moreau father sorin moreau fye week 5) today, my proposal of life in south bend, indiana will become known to all who read this integration. through only the willpower of myself, reflected on how i was taught and the people i meet, will i be able to flourish. under god’s command and guidance, these four years will be the years i never want to end. prof. thigpen moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 to believe or not to believe every human on the planet has a set of beliefs that define who they are as a person. beliefs are derived from trying to make meaning out of life which is experienced differently by each person. people may have similar beliefs, but how they developed those beliefs is what sets each human apart. i have a twin who is genetically the same person as me, however, our development through different experiences led to our different beliefs and how we interpret the world. throughout the first couple weeks of class, i have come to realize the importance of reflection and meditation, or what my mom likes to call, “soul-searching,” on who i am as a person and who i want to become. however, i have always felt like i know who i am, living in a supportive home and community with strong values. i learned from them how to be confident and assured in my beliefs which is the very basis of having a belief. i believe that i am searching for belonging. when i looked at who i wanted to be and what i valued in life, i wanted an education that would not only instruct me but nurture me as a human. there are so many opportunities that i would not be able to find at purdue because notre dame is centered around catholicism, and it is so prevalent. my faith life is something that i value, and i believe that by choosing to be a student at notre dame, i will be able to nurture it along with a great technical education. just as fr. sorin came to south bend for the first time with a vision for a great college (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. sorin – moreau fye week five), so am i walking on the campus of one of the top universities envisioned by fr. sorin, for the first time wondering if i will find my people. the community of notre dame is unlike any other school, and i believe that i am not far from finding my belonging within this community. this journey that i am on was shaped by my stories, whether about success or failure, and there is so much more in store for me if i continue to uphold my values alongside my education and time here at notre dame. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by putting in effort to sustain healthy relationships. my mom always said that relationships aren’t one-way streets. it takes the effort of both people in the relationship to sustain a fruitful relationship (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign – moreau fye week four). i am thankful every day that i have my parents as role models in my life who show me what it is like to be in a healthy relationship. not only are they role models, but they are active in teaching me ways to form and sustain this kind of relationship. especially in college, it is important to form the right kind of relationships because these are the ones that will last a lifetime if they are healthy. it’s also a perfect time to figure out the best way to balance social and academic life. i believe that i am made to grow closer to god and praise him by using my talents he gave me to better the world. he prepared me to live out my life as he planned, placing me on this earth with strong roots that are only strengthening me and making me feel more assured in what i believe. where i am from, where god planted me, has been the biggest influence on my root beliefs. looking around at other people around me, i can see there are people with maybe weaker roots or stronger roots, fertile soil or infertile soil, or fruit-bearing seeds or cone-bearing seeds. the diversity of humans is what makes us unique in what we give to others and what we are capable of sharing. (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six). for me individually, god made me to be right where i am today, stemming from the place where i am from. i believe that i grow by the challenges god has chosen for me to face. i had a traumatic event in my life that was a moment of growth, self-awareness, and character building. i had to disqualify myself from a golf tournament because i had accidentally broken the rules. no one knew about it except for me, and i could have easily kept silent and go to the next big tournament. however, i had to do some soul searching and deep thought about what this decision really meant: what do i really value in my life? adam 1 where i get to play at a bigger stage and possibly at the state tournament with all the accolades, or adam 2 where i can look myself in the mirror every morning knowing i demonstrated integrity (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). ever since then, fairness and honesty have played bigger roles in my life because i realize that i value them. people say they value these things, but do they realize why or deepen their thoughts? i also believe i came out of that event with more perspective. one golf tournament is not the end of the world; neither are the achievements i received along the way. my materialistic-self missed the awards and was angry for a very short amount of time compared to my value-based self that gained the priceless lessons and character construction for the rest of my life. it is all fleeting and people need to make sure they prioritize according to their values. i believe that i am responsible for my emotions and how i respond. before leaving for college, i was really trying to push away all the feelings that come with change. i mostly pushed away the negative emotions which eliminated the ability to feel the positive emotions. i regret being anxious and not looking at the bigger picture of what this time in my life truly means for me and my family. and even though i busied myself to avoid the feelings, i’m still facing them every day. i’m learning to sit in the discomfort and embrace this new experience because most of the freshmen are feeling the same discomfort and uncertainty as me. in order to feel connected and a part of the community here at notre dame i need to truly believe that i’m worthy of belonging and being connected. according to dr. brown, this is the difference between people who have a strong sense of belonging and those that do not (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). i believe this will make a difference in my experience that i am responsible for, here at notre dame. i can choose to be vulnerable and get the most out of the experience or choose to close myself off to amazing opportunities and the community at notre dame. i believe that i pursue truth by praying to god. faith has played an important role in my life and there are many instances where i’ve had to remind myself to slow down and have faith in god. there have also been many instances where i am grateful for being in the calm and peaceful state of waiting for god to reveal himself. after realizing that i need to take a step back occasionally, and take time for some deep thought, my perspective on the world has never been the same. deep thought allows me to think about my life and pray to god about my discernment. i need to trust in him that he has a plan for me and whatever it is i will carry it out to serve the world (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg – moreau fye week three). because that is what everyone is called to do in their lifetime: use their god-given gifts to then serve those in need. i believe that my community should be a source of strength and courage to be vulnerable. i grew up in a sheltered environment, being from an affluent, christian, and predominantly white suburb of chicago. without experiencing the stories of other people from other backgrounds, i would only have one story of them: my bias (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). as someone grows older, the idea is that they will learn from their experiences and mature. however, this assumes that everyone will have the opportunity to gain different experiences. during my childhood i never got that opportunity because i was very sheltered in my community. having this community is a blessing, but it just reminds me that i need to get outside of it to find the truth. stepping outside my comfort zone is the major way that i search for truth mainly because my comfort zone is my community that isn’t ridden with problems that could harm me. all these thought provoking and reflective questions have challenged me to rethink what i believe. however, i have always felt like i have a strong sense of who i am because of the environment i came from; a supportive and confident community. that is not to say i am closed off to the other perspectives presented, but i am confident in what i believe right now and have actually been reassured by the other perspective in what i know i do not believe. lets be better than yesterday who am i? where do i belong? how can i be someone that others desire to belong with? over the course of these last ten weeks, i have put myself through a great deal of change, growth, and self-reflection. through my qqc reflections, i have responded to many different topics that i wouldn’t normally indulge in, this created space for even deeper thought. i’ve realized how important it is to take a step back and think. in this essay, i will discuss who i was, who i am, and who i want to be. i will also develop on what i have learned in moreau this year so far through conversations with my classmates (whom i would already consider good friends), and through my thoughtful qqc assignments. saying goodbye to my best friends, holding on to every last second of my youth before shipping out to notre dame was difficult. the bonds i had with these certain fellas seemed unmatchable. we were all dispersing to our perspective schools and all the consistency i had ever felt was washing away in parallel. a new journey was ahead of me, me alone. my biggest challenge throughout this semester has been knowing my worth. i find myself studying copious amounts of hours just to receive below-average grades. the academics here at notre dame can be defeating. i ask myself often if i’m good enough or if i belong here. outside sources such as family and friends remind me that belonging has nothing to do with grades or status. a quote from week one, “the people that have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe they are worthy of love and belonging.” reminds me that the first step to me feeling my worth and belonging is confidence. although i am no longer at the top of my class like many other students in their high schools were, believing that i am a smart and worthy individual is fundamental to my happiness. self positivity is something i am working on and will continue to work on throughout this new journey. i will continue to be positive but also be aware that certain attributes and negative attitudes are nothing to be positive about. my relationships and friendship got off to a slow start. i felt like i didn’t have many people to talk to and found myself on the phone with friends from home maybe a little too often. although i miss the mountains back home, i believe that the people around you can make any place terrible, tolerable, or great. after the culture in my new and reestablished dorm started to develop, so did my friendships. i believe i have a good friend in every hallway of my building and at least six great friends to turn to if i were to ever need anything. this brings me confidence and a sense of home. these new friends have also taught me a lot about myself and they have shown me my own identity, not the identity i shared with my friends from high school. this quote from week three correlates to me meeting new people, “the greatest journey you will ever go on, is one of self-discovery.” the words self-discovery make it sound like it is a process that needs to be done alone, however, this is far from the truth. new friendships and new interactions make it easier to learn about yourself tenfold. i will walk with others at the university as we all try find ourselves and who we are. relationships should always be a two-way street, therefor i must strive to be the support system and good friend that i wish to have from someone else. sometimes it is easy and convenient to use people to get what you want. i believe that it is best to take a step back and put yourself in their shoes. i believe that most people are good and treating all with respect and empathy puts you on a great path to starting and building great relationships. don't look at people as their “single story” but invest in who they really are and who they aspire to be. support their aspirations and be willing to be vulnerable in your interactions. i want to be a man of god, who is kind in his ways and forgiving like the lord. throughout my life, i have struggled with mentorship. it wasn't until high school that i found someone that i looked up to. i want to be a person that the younger generation can look up to and find support and friendship with. in order to do this, i must start to better myself now. so when i have kids one day they don't have to seek a mentor but were born with one. what can i do with this new knowledge i have developed about myself and about life? the reason i am at notre dame is to get a degree, but i have realized that it is more important to be a kind and loving person to others rather than getting an a on my calc test. whereas if i am being a jerk to others and also getting a d on my calc test, that's when i’ll need some serious reflection. the relationships that i aspire to build here are ones to last a life time and this starts by being my true authentic self. my authentic self through personal shaping, “my framework has always been staying true to myself despite other thoughts and opinions, but now i feel that i need to better myself before being myself.” this requires constant self reflection. to be who i aspire to be, a loving, kind and caring individual, there will never be a finish line. every day will be a battle to be a better person than i was the day before. i will do this through the strength that god instills upon me and the support of my new and old friends and family. make it large mushfiq milan room for title what have i encountered and how will i respond? merriam april 28, 2022 capstone integration ryan retartha light in the dark “i will work to find the light in the dark, searching for god in my struggle, and love in the hatred. i will surround myself with people who uplift me, leaning into their life-giving love. when i have no one to lean on, i will give my struggle to god, he who has a plan greater than i can know.” for the duration of my young life, i dreamed of the time i would spend at notre dame, putting myself in the idyllic college experience my parents lived through themselves. i would fall asleep at night with the notre dame fight song on repeat in my head, imagining my walks across campus to class, the memories i’d make over dinner in south dining hall, the beautiful spring weather that would melt away the snow. i wanted to be a student on a blanket on the quad, doing my reading in the sun. i wanted to throw a frisbee with my friends, laughing and giggling with one another. i dreamed up this life, taking stories from my parents’ experiences and making them my own. i listened to how happy notre dame made them, and all i wanted was for notre dame to fulfill me in the same way. i had such a specific vision for what i wanted, what i deserved, and what i believed would be. looking back on my freshman year, with only a week before its conclusion, it is somewhat comical how far my life has strayed from the vision i had dreamed of. i didn’t even get into notre dame, rather i was offered a place at a small 400 person college across the street, and promised dual enrollment in both campuses. i was barred from the notre dame experience, given admittance only sometimes and banished to feeling like an outsider from the community i dreamed of. while i accepted my gateway offer and tried to make the most of a bad situation, i still felt on the outside from the notre dame experience, stripped of the dreams i had. the notre dame that i had grown up idealizing did not exist, and i suddenly felt ungrounded and confused. i was unhappy and lost, especially so when i compared my experience to how my friends from high school would rave about their colleges, telling me how happy they were that they had picked the right school. as much as it pained me to admit, i wasn’t happy; the notre dame i had imagined and worked for wasn’t real. when i was struck by this realization, my mindset plummeted quickly. i spent much of the first semester feeling uninvolved, isolated, and depressed. i could barely force myself to get out of bed, as i had lost my passion for learning and for the school, shocked that i had let myself get so tied up in a situation that was never real or meant for me. i felt numb, walking through each day in a daze, detached from the school and digging myself into an even deeper hole than i had started out in. notre dame had genuinely been the epitome of my hopes and dreams, as i spent every day prior living with the anticipation of the days where i would find happiness and fulfillment. instead, i was in the first semester of my freshman year, feeling nothing but depression and hatred for the school. i even called my parents, telling them i wanted to transfer because notre dame was not what i had thought it would be and i wasn’t happy with what it was. i went home on christmas break, filled out several transfer applications, and settled in to do some deep thinking about my upcoming decision. in my reflection, i was struck by a revelation, realizing that i was not unhappy because of notre dame, but because of the expectations i had held based on an experience that was never meant to be my own. coming home showed me how deeply notre dame had changed me, as family and friends remarked on how different and more adult i had grown. i realized that notre dame was fulfilling me, just not in the ways i had imagined. i felt inspired by the realization that i had, and made a pact that i wrote on a notecard i keep within my desk. every day, i was able to read it and remind myself, “i will work to find the light in the dark, searching for god in my struggle, and love in the hatred. i will surround myself with people who uplift me, leaning into their life-giving love. when i have no one to lean on, i will give my struggle to god, he who has a plan greater than i can know.” this mission statement is particularly applicable because notre dame made me realize that what i thought i would value about the school is not what i would’ve expected. i thought i would feel all the same things as my parents, but instead i experienced a whole new reality that gave me the tools i needed, not the tools i would’ve thought i’d need. in my time at notre dame, i was finally able to find the friends i had been searching for. i had imagined time at notre dame my entire life, but thought about the development i would experience on my own. instead, i was shown the truest form of myself through the people i met. these people inspire me daily to be truthful to myself, uplifting me when i’m down, and showing me love and loyalty when times are tough. through their relationship and unconditional friendship, i have been able to come into a new side of myself. this is a person i love being, and i credit that development entirely to the new friendships i have made. in the future, it is my mission to ensure that i maintain these kinds of friendships in my life, ones that fulfill me and challenge me to be the best version of myself. additionally, notre dame gave me a new relationship with god that i never would’ve expected. growing up, i had a relationship with god; i went to church and catholic school, i prayed somewhat frequently, but still felt overall disconnected from god. i struggled to see his presence in my daily life, and thought his role was overall irrelevant. however, upon coming to notre dame, i saw god in this place and its people. notre dame draws a community full of people who in their joy and celebration of differences, embody god and his message of inclusion and love. while i first felt the presence of god in my life to be absent, i now can lean on god and his works to support me when i feel lost or empty. notre dame has given me that gift, another key aspect of my mission statement, because i can trust in god to lead me out of the dark because he has knowledge of a plan greater than i myself can know. while it was hard for me to see, notre dame has helped me grow in wisdom and joy, in hidden ways that i myself was not expecting. the university shaped and surprised me, readjusting what i valued in life, and showing me how to live a well-lived life. as implied in my mission statement, i learned that struggle is not uncommon; it’s okay to feel dark and alone. however, it is more important to realize what can pull you out of that darkness, namely, love of friends and love of the lord. notre dame showed me what i value and how it will shape my life, and the little reminder i wrote on that note card will serve as a mission statement, not only for my next three years, but for the remainder of my life. integration two an obsession with definition according to the dictionary, a definition is “the act of defining, or of making something definite, distinct, or clear.” this meaning was determined by someone else who is well-versed with grammar and the english language, and therefore, it makes sense for this type of person to determine the meaning of this word. however, so many times throughout one’s life, a person will let other people define his or her own beliefs and perspectives. in some cases, this is for the better; for example, one’s family may teach them about morality and religion. in other cases, this can be for the worse as sources like popular media can portray a group of people in a stereotypical way or cause someone to have unrealistic expectations about their future. one of the more harmful applications of a definition is when it is applied to oneself and his or her expectations. expectations can be very helpful as they allow someone to form goals for himself or herself. for example, if a child’s father expects them to follow in his footsteps, this could provide the person with a drive to succeed and to make his parent proud. it can also be a source of comfort to have someone who is close to you that has already gone through your chosen path. however, expectations like this can be harmful if they go against a person’s own goals, happiness, and reality. an example of this could be the budding artist whose family pushes him to give up on painting and get a ‘real’ job. in this case, by letting someone else define his future, the young artist will likely experience sadness and disappointment if he allows this to continue. a quote related to this idea was detailed in the ninth week of moreau. it says “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_sou rce=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau). the good and bad side of expectations https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau can be applied to my own life. on the positive side, they help me to set goals and feel accomplished when i reach them. for example, as a prospective finance major, i try to perform the best that i can within my fundamentals of finance class, so when i received an a-grade on our most recent midterm, i was excited and glad that my hard work paid off. on the other hand, my expectations have also led me to feel disappointment and sadness. during the fall of last year, i was applying to different colleges and universities, and one of these stood above the rest. i preferred this college to such an extent that when asked how i’d rank the schools that i’m applying to, i would say that this school was my number one choice, and every other school was relatively equal. i was both confident and hopeful that i’d get in. when i received their response to my early application, i saw that i had been deferred to regular decision. although it wasn’t a straightforward denial, it felt like one to me at the time, and i became very disappointed. however, i held on to the belief that i would be accepted during the regular decision round of applications. when i read the final denial, i shrugged it off in the moment, but after an hour or so, i felt very disappointed and sad as i’d been dreaming about an acceptance letter for such a long time. in this situation, my expectations and my own definition of my future caused me to feel disappointed, which is why it can be harmful to apply definitions to oneself. definitions can also have harmful effects when applied to other people and groups. this is detailed in the eleventh week of moreau when ms. shibata says “if all the accounts that you hear are of police brutality or bias, then that impacts your thinking about police and how you might interact with police” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by the klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven, https://voicestrue.nd.edu/stories/keri-kei-shibata/). the example of police in the modern day is one situation in which an unfair stereotype is used to define a group of people. although some people have held negative beliefs towards the police force for a while, it has significantly worsened within the last two years. protests broke out across the united states in response to the death of george flloyd, which unfortunately resulted in actions of violence from both the protester and law enforcement sides of the https://voicestrue.nd.edu/stories/keri-kei-shibata/ situation. however, violence by the police was heavily focused on by the news media, which resulted in the media essentially running a smear campaign against the police force. this quickly led to the demonization of the entire force nationwide. although an overwhelming majority of cops are good people who seek the safety of their communities, they were portrayed as monsters, and they now have to deal with the mental health problems that result from this type of negative, hateful sentiment. this false definition of police, which was created from the single perspective of the “bad cop,” resulted in the whole force suffering unfairly, which shows how stereotypes are harmful when applied to a group of people. this false perception of a group can also negatively impact those outside of it. as someone who enjoys visiting the city of chicago, i am grateful for our police force; although chicago’s crime rate is high, much of the city itself is completely safe due to their work. however, this has changed recently. in 2021, chicago is on track to lose about 1000 officers because of retirement and other causes. this number is almost double that of a normal year. having dealt with continued negative publicity and actions by the city’s government that conflicted with the goals of law enforcement, many police decided to leave. because of this, crime rates have gone up throughout the city, even in places that had been perfectly secure. for example, during fall break, my mother told me about how there had been numerous carjackings on michigan avenue, which is somewhere that i had always believed to be safe. in this way, the false definition of a group can not only harm its members but also those around them. the best way to combat the negative effects that definitions can have on oneself and his or her perspectives of others is through understanding. a helpful way to reach understanding is by realizing and accepting flaws or negative events. during the tenth week of moreau, kirsten, the kintsugi artist, says “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto moreau fye week ten, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/). different moments and situations help to define who a person is, and by realizing the importance that both good and bad events have, someone can better understand themselves and accept unfortunate events. for me, the denial from my dream school caused me to feel disappointment; however, if that hadn’t happened, i would never have ended up at the university of notre dame, which i truly believe is a better fit for me than my dream school would have been. also, during the last year, one of my friendships turned out to be toxic, and as a result, i grew closer with my current best friend and learned the importance of true, caring relationships. without these negative situations, i wouldn’t have experienced the positives that resulted from them. because of these experiences, i have gained a better understanding of myself and am prepared to define my own future, freeing myself from the harm that unhealthy expectations may have. understanding the situations and experiences of other people can also combat the negative effects that outside definitions like stereotypes may have. during the twelfth week of moreau, one of the modules detailed how “human life is only a long way of the cross . . . the way of the cross is everywhere, and we walk along it every day in spite of ourselves and often unknown to us” (“holy cross and christian education” by the campus ministry moreau fye week twelve, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186731?module_item_id=103503). by being willing to listen to others' perspectives and realizing that everyone goes through difficult situations, one can begin to sympathize with and understand others instead of allowing stereotypes to control his or her perspective. in the example of the police, by realizing the insults and personal attacks unleashed at them on a daily basis, this understanding will likely lead to support from the community, which acts to bring people together. in these ways, actively trying to understand the perspectives of other people combats the harmful effects of single perspectives and https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ stereotypes. unlike words where an expert gives them their definition, the act of defining, in many cases, is best left to those who are being defined. moreau fyscapstone integration prof. david pruitt moreau fys april 29, 2022 stop talking, start walking when it comes to talking about my own personal mission statement, i will say something that, by this point in the school year, i have likely reiterated dozens of times, either due to its relevance in how i wish to conduct myself or just because i cannot think of anything else to write. i have talked at length about my mission to improve the many less than stellar aspects of my person, from my work ethic to my social skills and confidence to my more concrete goals concerning what i want to achieve during my college career. i have talked at length about how “[i] want to feel the pride of [my] own accomplishments”1 and how true joy and satisfaction “is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you.”2 i have talked about how i want to break out of the eternal comfort zone that has been my dorm room couch and get out and experience all of the social gatherings that make college so memorable and fun, because “the future is made… of encounters, because life flows through our relationships with others.”3 i have talked about as many avenues of improvement as i can think of, mentioning every way in which i can make myself a more confident, competent, and complete individual. in other words, my mission statement has, since the beginning of the year, wrapped almost every aspect of this course’s self-reflection and improvement advice into a well thought-out plan. and that is where the problem lies. in spite of everything i have just stated about my desire to improve, that is all it has ever been up until this point: a desire. my so-called “well thought-out” plan has never been put into action, as i instead keep telling myself that it will eventually come into action on its own accord. 3 “the future you” by pope francisweek 7 2 “three key questions” by fr. michael himesweek 3 1 “week five discernment conversation activity” by todd howardweek 5 while many things in life occur slowly over time as the result of a series of individual events, personal change and improvement never begins as the result of outside forces, but instead as the result of one’s own commitment to changing themselves. and so far, that commitment is nowhere to be found. i have talked so much about bolstering my work ethic and starting to cut down on how much i procrastinate, and yet i have not even been able to walk away from the habit of writing this very paper an hour before it is due. i have thus far responded to the suffering of having to write a thousand words by not writing them at all, leaving me in the same sad state i have been in while writing every other integration paper. i have talked so much about wanting to attend parties and social gatherings in order to create a solid foundation for social confidence and meaningful friendships as well as to construct a solid sense of empathy that i have otherwise been lacking, as “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment.”4 even though one of the main points of a life well-lived is not to avoid suffering but instead “is about how to respond to suffering,”5 i continue to cling onto the comfortable familiarity of my desk, my couch, and my bed, locking myself away in my dorm room as a result of my failure to act with courage and perform an act that most of my friends are able to pull off subconsciously and with ease. the only time i walk out towards another room with other people in there besides my roommate both in a metaphorical and literal sense is to go to the restroom. i have talked about setting myself up for success later on in life, about how i want to forge a path of my own, a path distinctive from that of my father and those around me in mendoza with similar aspirations, and although i have walked away from each class of principles of management with a new concept or idea to ponder, it rarely remains in my mind past lunch time. how can i develop the necessary 5 “why does god allow suffering” by dr. jihoon kimweek 6 4 “a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergweek 9 wisdom to conquer life’s many challenges and “be intentional about the information which [i] expose [myself] to”6 if i cannot retain such knowledge beyond the door of a debartolo lecture hall? my freshman year will come to close not even a week from when i am writing this integration, and it seems like all of the things i have talked about for so long will amount to nothing but a string of well-intentioned yet ultimately empty promises and goals. however, with the summer finally beginning to rise over the horizon, so too does one last opportunity to capitalize on my mission statement rise. during the next three months of sunshine and fun, i will find myself in the privileged position to live at the beach in delaware from memorial day almost all the way through to the start of my sophomore year here at notre dame. the beach in question, dewey beach, is somewhat of a party town with many bars and restaurants that serve the large crowds of tourists that make their way through there every summer, and over the last two years of staff shortages, they have been more than eager, if not desperate, to take on new employees. as a result, i have made it my goal to land a job at one of these establishments for the summer, as it will check off many of the empty boxes which i have discussed above. i will be forced to stick to a rigorous work schedule that will build better time management skills for me come the fall semester, i will have to interact with many different people, both fellow employees and patrons alike, and thus build up my social skills and confidence, and i will finally gain some work experience that provide invaluable wisdom as i look towards internship opportunities and full-time employment in the coming years. also, what is not to love about living and working in a beach party-town for the summer? throughout my freshman year, i have talked all of the talk that there is to talk, but this summer, i will finally begin to walk the walk. 6 “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkoweek 11 microsoft word final copy of integration essay moreau mayor 1 15 october 2021 professor hnatusko integration assignment pursuit of happiness i believe that i am searching for genuine happiness. this may sound obvious and applicable to everyone, but i cannot say this has always been true for me. in high school, i found myself having trouble developing healthy and genuine friendships. this feeling of isolation and disarrangement shocked me because i had no problem making friends in grade school. one would think that going to the same school as my cousin would help ease my sad feelings, but it made things worse. my classmates constantly compared us, which ultimately led us to drift apart. during my sophomore year, i gave up on trying to cultivate new friendships. i did not feel like i belonged. in her speech, brené brown talked about how those who feel alone also feel that they are unworthy of love (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). i know this to be true because of my high school experience. along the way, i did build a few unhealthy relationships, and i am proud to say i have left them. in her article on toxic friendships, olivia taylor wrote, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). the friends i did have did not make me feel positive; in fact, they intensified my feelings of isolation. i eventually made a few friends that i value and talk to today, but i still felt like an outsider in my school community. because of this, i more intensely focused on my academics. i shielded my pain with academic validation. with every 4.0 semester, i told myself perfect grades were worth not having many friends. eventually, i put so much mayor 2 pressure on myself to excel in school that my anxiety intensified dramatically. i prioritized my success so much that i forgot even to consider my happiness. while i realize how toxic this lifestyle was, it did lead me to notre dame, so i am somewhat grateful. today, i prioritize my happiness but still consider my success. i do not put as much pressure on myself to get a’s. i have cultivated healthy friendships, and i am so proud of myself. i believe that i grow by learning from my past. my past is a part of me, but it certainly does not define me. it is important to look back and learn from your mistakes because nothing good comes from them if you do not. carla harris reinforced this idea when she said, “pay attention to things as they happen to you for when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). during my saddening high-school years, my relationship with god withered. i wondered why bad things happened to good people. i wondered why god let my two cousins die when they had so much life to live. as father pete mccormick highlighted, i forgot that my and everyone’s journeys were in the hands of god. in his speech, father pete mccormick talked about the importance of remaining hopeful in times of despair. i wish i had heard father pete’s message during this dark time in my life because i did lose hope (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick, c.s.c – moreau fye week three). i remember the day when i went to my aunt’s house and asked her how she still had so much faith and hope after losing her only daughter. she explained the concept of free will and said that if there were no evil or sadness in the world, we would have no free will. i will never forget this conversation with my aunt because it helped me rekindle my relationship with god. i am so grateful that i can look back on my past and grow from it because it has helped me become the best version of myself. mayor 3 i believe that my community should focus more on including everyone. in their article, keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris all write about the effects of implicit biases. people like to speak as if they are not included in this issue, but the sad reality is that everyone has implicit biases (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american – moreau fye week seven). it is essential that notre dame students recognize their implicit biases so that they can correct them. at notre dame so far, i have joined best buddies and special olympics. both of these clubs aim to help kids with special needs. i have always had a passion for helping kids with special needs. because my cousin jack has autism, i have seen firsthand how poorly kids with disorders are treated. before jack became the global ambassador of best buddies, he struggled socially and mentally. people bullied him for being different. seeing this broke my heart; it is what inspired me to join best buddies. at notre dame, people’s implicit biases toward kids with special needs show. i often hear kids using the word “retard.” i know most of the kids that say this word do not know how offensive it is, but it highlights this issue of implicit bias. to help prevent these implicit biases from becoming severe issues, i have joined student government. i am a part of the movie committee and am in the process of teaming up with best buddies. my goal is to include local kids with special needs in notre dame events, such as movie nights. this will help create a more diverse community on campus. i believe i am who i am today because of my family. i did not realize this until writing my “where i’m from” poem; while writing it, i found myself reflecting on some of my favorite family traditions. when reflecting on my beliefs and values and considering my adam 1 and adam 2 traits (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, ted – moreau fye week two), i see my family within myself. i have always been a very driven mayor 4 person, one who focuses on success; however, i now know never to prioritize my future over my intrinsic values. this learned lesson is something i am proud of, and it perfectly aligns with notre dame’s beliefs. one of father moreau’s most famous quotes is as follows: “the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart.” i am grateful that i grew up in a house that reinforced moreau’s belief. i value knowledge because knowledge is power; however, i value my character more. while my parents have shaped me throughout my childhood, notre dame shapes me today. what makes notre dame different from other top schools is that they intimately care about their students. they want to shape their students into spiritual and loving beings, all while strengthening their minds. i am privileged and grateful to attend such a wonderful university that prepares me for my future. microsoft word moreau integration 2.docx father kevin sandberg moreau integration 2 2 december 2021 a reflection of the semester 105 days. 2448 hours. 146,880 minutes. each of these equivalent times represent how long i have been here at notre dame. three months ago, on august 20th, i arrived to notre dame’s campus, along with the approximately 2000 other incoming freshman. i cannot believe how little time has passed, but how much my life has changed… for the better. i cannot believe that i am days away from finishing my very first semester of college. by being here at notre dame, it has helped me gain a better understanding of my past, present, and future. what am i made of? especially towards the end of high school, college was all i would talk about. i would tell my mom at least once a day how i was so excited to graduate high school and go to college, even though i had no idea where i wanted to go or what i wanted to study. during my later years of high school, reaching college was almost the only bright side to attending high school. overall, high school was not a fun experience for me. especially during the year where high school mattered the most, senior year, i was not having fun. honestly, my last year in high school was filled with unhealthy friendships and anxiety. one of the biggest problems i encountered in high school was that i really struggled with finding a friend group that i identified with. although i had a lot of friends, i did not have a lot of close friends. friendships were very one-way and surface-level. my friends and i did not “cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation,” which is a key element of a community (“thirteen ways to look at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). we would support one another, but we would rarely challenge one another. i believe that honesty in a relationship is crucial for both parties to be happy. in addition to the issue of friends, towards the end of school, i began to experience a lot of anxiousness not just from schoolwork, but from physically school itself. there was a point in time where even entering the school building would cause my chest to tighten. i absolutely hated going to school, so i ultimately switched to online school for the second half of my senior spring semester. overall, i couldn’t wait to go to college. this high school experience is i think what i am made of. even though i did not enjoy high school, i still kept my eye on better days ahead (i.e. college). for that reason, i believe that i am very hopeful. even though i didn’t have a good time in high school, i had hope for my future. i think a lot of the hope i had was from a great relationship i had with god. this relates back to my moreau week 12 content of our rules for life. my first rule i wrote down was “try to keep god in mind (“rules of life” by – moreau fye week 12).” even though sometimes i would struggle with things during my senior year, i would try to talk them over with god. i would come to him about anything, whether it be as big as my college admission decisions or just keeping me safe on a quick drive to the store. my answer to “what i am made of” is very similar to the kintsugi pottery that was discussed in the week 10 materials (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto – moreau fye week 10)”. the shattered pottery is rebuilt, and its pieces are mended with gold. i think this ties in with the concept of hope. no matter how broken your pottery is, it will be rebuilt to once again create a strong and beautiful piece of art. similarly, no matter how much brokenness you have personally encountered, you can be rebuilt into something brand new and more beautiful. this concept of rebuilding should be a sense of hope. there is always time for healing. what am i made for? i unfortunately do not have an exact career path, location, or lifestyle that would answer the question of “what am i made for?” i do not know exactly what my life’s purpose is. despite not having the knowledge of where my final “destination” of the journey of life will be, i truly believe that i am on my way to reaching it. i believe that by being a student here at notre dame, i have officially begun the journey of reaching that career path, location, or lifestyle relating to my life’s purpose. i finally have the freedom i always desired. however, gaining this freedom has come with a lot of adjusting, especially with pluralistic ignorance. this relates back to the content of the ted-ed talk by elizabeth cox (“what is impostor syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week 9). since notre dame is such a prestigious college with such talented students, it is hard to open up about struggles with academics here. from the outside, it seems like everyone here is doing well, getting enough sleep, eating healthy, having a social life, and overall having a balanced schedule. although i know this is not true, it still seems like everyone is perfect. as a result, i have consistently criticized myself over not being perfect and not “keeping up to par.” however, i have begun to realize that i always try to put my best foot forward, and try my best at all times. this may be cheesy, but i feel that my life experiences over the past several years is similar to a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. like a caterpillar, i had to go through a period of discomfort (my high school experience) to be able to emerge into something beautiful (being a student at a college i love). despite this period of discomfort, it was only temporary. at notre dame, i know i am happier than i have ever been, and it has been noticeable by others. when i came back for winter break, my mother had told me that she can tell i am a happier person since arriving here at notre dame. i completely agree with her. i have had so much fun here at notre dame, and i have formed so many great friendships. pretty much every day here, i have smiled, laughed, or made memories. even though i am just a first semester freshman, i have really tried to relish every single day here. i am extremely lucky and fortunate to be able to attend such a highly-acclaimed university that i believe is my dream college. go irish! fye: integration ii experiencing life & developing character experience is the kingpin of progress. thus, failure is both inevitable and necessary for growth of any kind, particularly in new situations. entering into a new chapter of life, one cannot allow their fear of failure to become a setback, keeping one from pushing out of their comfort zone. starting my first year of college in a new state with new friends, places, and encounters has taught me this important lesson. as the semester progressed, i began to encounter dissonance, brokenness, community, and hope, enabling me to develop a better understanding of myself and my future. encountering dissonance has been among the more difficult journeys of understanding for myself and many others this semester. following welcome weekend, the weeks seemed to blur together; my days were busy with classes and work, coupled with countless new interactions, faces, and events. each second of the day seemed filled with expectations and stress amidst the confusion of a new environment. though i did not struggle to find close friends within my dorm and companions in my classes, my hopes for meeting new people had fallen slightly. unrealistically, i had believed it possible to meet my closest friends for the next four years within the first few days, discouraged seeing others grouping together so quickly. as the months passed, however, i found myself growing with my friends both within and outside of my dorm, finding comfort and companionship in people with whom i could fully be myself. changing my mindset, i have begun to worry less and less about becoming best friends with each new acquaintance, focusing on being authentic and honest with myself and those around me. the insight of emery bergmann helped me to understand that i was not alone in these feelings and that change is essential for growth. she states “i couldn’t get past superficial conversation, how i couldn’t seem to enjoy parties, feel comfortable on campus, or just meet people who i wanted to spend more time around. i felt so lost and beyond confused” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). bergmann’s words offered a refreshing take on the college freshman, allowing myself and others dealing with loneliness and crestfallen expectations to relate to her. she talked of “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me. going to college is a massive change — so many students are being uprooted from the familiar comforts of their homes and thrust into a completely new place”(“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). emery’s words helped me feel less alone in this struggle, helping me to put less pressure on my social relationships. in the upcoming semester, i hope to utilize emery’s advice, growing my relationships with friends, new and old, in a way that is organic and stress-free. this encounter with dissonance has helped me to question and develop a deeper understanding of how to form strong, healthy relationships and the importance of my mental health. over the past few months, i have developed an understanding of others within my community by encountering brokenness. growing up in new york, i was always surrounded by music and art, learning instruments, visiting museums like moma, the met, and the guggenheim. the presence of art in my life became a constant comfort, filling my head with melodies and allowing me to pursue hobbies that allowed my creativity to flow freely. with my violin, i am able to translate my feelings into music, letting go of my thoughts and allowing myself to fully let go of any anger, sadness, or stress that fills my mind. using music and art, i have been able to not only develop a positive, productive way to channel my emotions and release stress but also bring joy to others. similarly, kirsten helgeson’s kintsugi art workshops helped me to understand the importance of compassion and healing in making change within a community. she states that she “used this as a way to both heal things for who i am and celebrate who i am, but then also to help other people learn to do that same sort of healing” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto” moreau fye week 10). as she explained that this form of art is used as a way to help members of her community to heal as well as herself, i was inspired by the power of her art. helgeson says that her clients “come from lots of different walks of life. i’ve had people that have been survivors of domestic violence, survivors of human trafficking go through and create kintsugi. i’ve had women that have been experiencing divorce, even if it was like 10 years ago, and trying to let go and process some of the emotion around it”(“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). allowed to visualize their suffering and experiences in a piece of art made by their own hands, these individuals are able to process their emotions, letting go of those which continue to plague their minds. listening to helgeson speak of how those who participate in kintsugi use it to mentally heal from traumas, such as domestic violence and human trafficking, i understood, as i often use music as a form of healing, either through listening or playing. i believe that music and art therapies like this are essential to helping students and adults alike, allowing them a productive outlet to deal with the stresses of their daily lives, as well as more serious experiences. helgeson’s words have allowed me to prioritize and fully understand the importance of healing from one’s past and present experiences in order to live in a fulfilling manner. i hope to continue using music and outlets like knitting and crocheting to help me to relieve stress, anxieties, and relax throughout the semester, developing a greater understanding of how to heal from brokenness. throughout my life, i have learned much from my encounters with community, both positive and negative. during the pandemic, i watched countless instances of hate crimes and racial slurs within the greater community of new york as well as those recounted on social media platforms by east asian youth, feeling powerless sitting behind a screen. it was then that i first understood what it was to fear for the safety of my family, what it was to explain to my grandparents that it was no longer safe for them to make their weekly trips to chinatown. when discussing outbreaks of the coronavirus at my high school, racist and ignorant comments were uttered by a number of my peers, broadcast to the remainder of the grade to witness on social media. though some students, as well as myself, had attempted to correct this language, these students continued to display their ignorance. such experiences have allowed me to understand the complicated topic of how bigotry and racism can deteriorate a community. the snapshot summary allowed me to understand the experiences of other students of color within the notre dame community; one student spoke of his experience with another student, saying “i saw him in the dining hall and asked if i could sit with him”... “he greeted me by saying something...made a joke about something with the coronavirus and called me a name” … “implied that all asians are basically the same”(“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race” moreau fye week 11). later, a professor stated “if you’re black and 99% of the other people are white when you are sitting in the dining hall...no wonder you would choose then two sit with the two or three black students”(“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race” moreau fye week 11). experiences and occurrences such as these often dissuade students of color from associating with these individuals, causing them to stick together in social groups, as cited in the dining hall example. these events break down the ties of interconnectedness within a community. though education, shared experience, and awareness are instrumental in strengthening and rebuilding connection within a community in the face of ‘conflict and dissimilarity’, there comes a point at which it is entirely impossible to understand the experiences of people of color and individuals belonging to marginalized groups without having lived them. to this same point, those whose racism, bias, and bigotry are so ingrained in their paths of thought and everyday actions cannot simply be changed without the will to do so. however, it is necessary that myself and all other students, faculty, and staff work towards a future of progress, educating others on other religions, cultures, and ethnicities in an attempt to create ground for conversation about difficult topics like racism within our communities. as the semester comes to a close, i have continued to reflect on my encounters with hope, both within and outside of the notre dame community. i immediately thought back to the ways in which acting according to the words of christ has brought hope into my life: making new friends by reaching out to strangers in my dorm, reigniting my passion for music after playing violin alongside my church choir, or discovering the things that matter most to me through daily prayer. at notre dame, i have found new hope in small things: the promise of fall seen in trees filled with vibrant leaves, looking forward to ryan hall’s fj’s on tuesday nights, and friday movie nights with my friends. finding a sliver of hope in the most stressful and grueling of days has allowed me to endure struggles and push past negativity in my life, discovering positivity in the light of a dark moment. hope has allowed me to open myself up to new experiences, reaching out to others and finding reasons to be thankful. the text written by father james b. king helped me conceptualize how one lives and grows in hope, particularly as a christian. he states that “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week 12). to grow as an individual, we are called by god to live like his son, not only to live a life that will allow us to be with god in heaven but to have hope. father king continues, preaching that “in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope.” … “we must be men with hope to bring”(“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week 12). in both dark times and light, the cross represents christ’s gift to humanity; the greatest symbol of hope. in our own lives, we must find symbols of hope in our future, religious or not, to allow us to move onward, fueled by hope, by anticipation. this encounter with hope has brought me clarity as to how hope can allow us to grow as individuals and propel us forward through life. these experiences with community, hope, brokenness, and dissonance have helped me to look forward, using my encounters to build character, contribute to my communities, and prioritize my own spiritual and mental health. as i look towards my future at notre dame, i hope to use my newfound knowledge to help me to grow in faith, happiness, and as an academic, developing a deeper understanding of myself along the way. integration 1 paulina romero oct 15, 2021 moreau fye a journey of self-discovery i believe that being vulnerable makes you strong and not weak… i believe that my virtues and beliefs are the root of my success… i believe that in order to be successful my achievements have to be significant… i believe that being patient and optimistic will strengthen my faith… i believe that self-love and self-care is a priority… my root beliefs stated above are beliefs that allow me to grow and prosper as a person. each one is dedicated to one of the main objectives in my moreau class for that week, and one by one i have adapted those beliefs and now live by them on a daily basis. these beliefs give me faith, stability, and optimism for my future, my goals, and my relationships with the people that surround me. for the first week of moreau we were asked to watch a video, called “the power vulnerability” a ted talk by brené brown. before i even started this assignment and knew about the root beliefs i watched in awe this first video. it inspired me to be my authentic self, and i decided to live by brené’s inspiring words. soon, i discovered that every video had an important lesson to teach, and an essential takeaway for all students, and i feel like this first video was an essential first step towards allowing us students to thrive in notre dame. brené mentions in her ted talk how vulnerability makes you courageous and brave, rather than weak. this allowed me to view the word vulnerable differently. i feel like vulnerability has such a bad connotation to it, because people are afraid of it, afraid of looking weak. after watching this video, i understood that it isn’t that way. being vulnerable does indeed make you a stronger person. it shows that you are strong and brave enough to present yourself in your true colors, and this has allowed me to create deeper, more meaningful connections with the people in notre dame. the first few weeks, i was terrified i wasn’t going to be able to create strong friendships, and i did struggle a lot with it. coming from a city where everyone knows everyone, and school where you grow alongside the same people for 14 years, from pre-kinder to senior year. when you are in that environment you don’t have the chance to be other than your true-self. these people have seen my cry probably most times my own parents did, that is why we formed such a tight knit community. then after arriving at notre dame and seeing so many students, it felt extremely overwhelming. i would make a friend in a class and then never see them for weeks. it was hard to create connections, and hard being my true self because i was never able to feel comfortable with a fresh new group of people. slowly, i began to form a friend group, now that friend group has seen me cry, and seen me happy. they’ve celebrated my accomplishments with me, and supported me when i’ve encountered rocks on the road. what felt impossible the first weeks, is now a reality and it all began by being vulnerable and authentic. my second and third root belief goes hand in hand with the first one. my beliefs are the root of my success. now, success may have different meanings to every person, to many it may be material and money-wise, but to me success means being proud and happy of the life that i’ve built, and the person i’ve become. it means achieving my personal, inner goals, as well as my professional career based goals. goals that are significant to myself, and will certainly make an impact on those around me, because if my goals are significant then i can’t consider them successful. when arriving at notre dame some of my goals were, creating healthier habits, creating a friend group, and developing new study and learning skills. although each and everyone of these goals have room for growth, my virtues have certainly allowed them to meet every single one of my goals half way. in the second week of moreau, we watched another ted talk called “should you live for your resume or for your eulogy?” by david brooks. he separated our virtues as adam 1 and adam 2. where adam 1 had virtues more career focused and money focused while on the contrary adam 2 virtues are more personal virtues, such as kindness, communication, and collaboration. david brooks said a quote that i think it is important to highlight. he said “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love” (“should you live by your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that this quote was very important to hear, because what i think brooks is trying to say is that whatever adam 1 virtue you may have, it can not be accomplished without the use of an adam 2 virtue; and that living through adam 2 virtues will allow you to be successful in those of adam 1. now how did i apply these to my own experiences? one of my personal goals was forming a friend group, and one of my professional goals was creating better study habits so i am able to excel in my classes. the way i was able to accomplish both of these goals was by combining both adam 1 and adam 2 virtues. i used adam 2 virtues such as kindness, communication and collaboration, that allowed me to create a strong friend group, which then became my study group. we get together before every chem exam (because we all take chemistry) and we review together. these study groups have allowed me to ace my exams, more than once, which therefore accomplishes my adam 1 virtues, being professionally successful. one of my personal goals that i’ve been trying to achieve when arriving at notre dame was strengthening my faith. that is actually one of the reasons i chose this school because at times i felt disconnected from my spirituality, and i knew that a place like notre dame would help me strengthen it, and little by little i understood that to have faith you have to be optimistic, and patient. two things that also have room for improvement. in the third week we saw a video by the amazing father pete, in which he talked a little about having faith, and going through a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim journey of self-discovery; and he approached faith in a very interesting way which was referring to it as a knot. this metaphor, as the knot being your faith, cleared my view on so many doubts i had about my spirituality, because not so much i struggled having faith, but instead understanding what’s faith, because i used to think that you can’t have faith without understanding it. with this video i understood that it isn’t that way. those doubts and questions are just part of the journey of self-discovery. father pete says “at the core of one-self is the very presence of god”, (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three) and i think this is what he means by a journey of self-discovery. you must go through that process, and that journey, to feel and understand the presence of god within yourself, and that is how you build your strength. as one of my favorite psalms quotes “god is within her, she will not fail” -psalm 46:5. feeling the presence of god allowed me to feel better about myself and take care of myself first, which before i really never did before, which is also what helped me build my last root belief. as well as understanding this made my transition to college much easier, making new friends, getting good grades, learning to be independent, all with the strength of god. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois integration three: moreau fye 5 march 2022 philippians 1:21 i would like to begin by thanking all of you here to honor and the life she lived. she would be immensely grateful for every individual here, no matter how close or distant, so thank you for being here. as i reflect on her life and acknowledge the reality that she is gone, i can’t help but think about what it meant to live a good life for her. to those of you who know her well, you know she would define a good life as one that is devoted to christ and his will in all areas of life. a life well-lived to aiza is a life surrendered to god, that is how she’d put it and that is what she would encourage each and every one of us to pursue (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). i know that she doesn’t want us to be upset beyond reason about her passing because she would remind us that she is in a way better place than we are: in the loving and splendid presence of christ. aiza would be almost upset if i didn’t mention this verse because it is a definition of the culmination of her life and what she would want for us too. the bible tells us through the words of the apostle paul, “for to me, to live is christ and to die is gain '' philippians 1:21. aiza accomplished a myriad of things in her life and broke down many barriers, but she would ultimately attribute her life to this verse. she was living for christ and now she has gained the best gift a believer can reach as they pass; being in the arms of christ. many of us know aiza as someone who had a lot of goals and extensively worked towards them regardless of the season of life she was going through. but let us never forget how much she valued the importance of slowing down and viewing life from the bigger canvas five feet away, instead of looking at the intricate detail two inches away (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). she found beauty in the act of slowing down, especially because of how her procrastinating tendencies caught up to her in school and how she was used to being in the “work hard, sleep when you die” mentality. aiza always encouraged me to slow down in life and you would constantly hear her say, yolo, although not in the way most people say it. she would use it more as an excusatory term for her procrastination. regardless, she https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ would still somehow get stuff done, no matter what it took, because she knew what she wanted in life and she was going to get it. and now we reflect on her life and see that she did achieve most of her goals, especially her desire from a very early start to be an immigration attorney. she was inspired by other first-gen latinas, like jessica pedroza, who sought to be advocates and a voice for the unheard (“domer dozen” moreau fye week two). aiza reached for the sky and more when it came to reaching goals, but there’s no discrediting the journey she went through during college and graduate school as she discerned where god would take her in her career and if she was truly seeking what he wanted for her (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four) . as she navigated the discernment process, she was unsure if she would end up where she did, but she was beyond certain about the life of advocacy she would live and pursue with christ. collectively, she defined a life well-lived through the altruistic sense of choosing a career based on not only what one can gain, but what one can do for others through that occupation (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). she would remind us that a career is not for advancing oneself but for advancing the world and the mission to create a better tomorrow. most importantly, aiza was a firm believer in teamwork and interacting with others for advancing that better tomorrow. we all knew that she quite literally would never stop talking, so we also know she loved people. she saw people coming together as a beautiful instrument to love and to show the love of christ but also to realize how amazing it is to realize that we are all the same at the end of the day (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). she was an advocate for inclusion and would always highlight the importance of togetherness in such a divided world, no matter where you stand politically or what you looked like, she wanted you in the conversation because she believed togetherness was the best advancement we could work towards. one thing i will always remember about her is when you’d ask her for advice about a situation. no matter how significant or small the situation may have been, aiza would do her best to point you to christ. there were times when i felt unloved and unheard, without purpose, but she would remind me of the true fulfillment and love found in christ and seeking his face in all circumstances. she would want me to remind you that she was far from righteous or perfect because she is a human and like the rest of us, inherently devoted to sinful nature. she messed up and she regretted many things she did in her life, but in that same spirit she reflected on the love and https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056/download?download_frd=1 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript forgiveness christ consistently offered to all of us. one of her favorite verses was about god’s grace, 2 corinthians 12:9, “my grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. therefore i will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that christ’s power may rest on me.” god’s grace was one of her favorite of his qualities because she was able to see his heart in the way he poured grace into his children. she saw his grace in all of his creation, especially in the things around her. in addition to slowing down, aiza most appreciated seeing beauty in the smallest things in life. she always sought to appreciate and admire god’s creation, no matter how small or big. many of us can recall instances where she has encouraged us out of our comfort zone to do something that would be a moment of contemplation on god’s beautiful creation. whether she made you go and sit on a field and stare at the night sky at 9pm, or pulled up to the side of the road for a sunset, she was always an advocate for enjoying the small moments of life (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). that is one of the most significant things i will take from aiza’s life, her ability to find beauty in the unknown and her ability to enjoy and meditate on the beauty of the smallest moments in life. she would want us all to occasionally stare at the sky and wonder, to stand in a field and run through it without a care in the world, and to look at the details of a flower and marvel at its beauty and perfect creation. she wants us to see christ in all things because all things are from him, through him, and for him, let us not forget that without christ we are unable to live a life well-lived. may she rest in peace in the arms of our father and rejoice as she dwells in his presence for eternity. ultimately, to live is christ, to die is gain. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 prest dave lassen moreau the notre dame adventure! when i think of words to sum up my first semester at college, a few come right to the front of my mind: stressful, hectic, and incredible. though i have encountered more challenges and difficulties than i imagined coming into my time here, there is nowhere i would rather be. new friends, time management challenges, and fantastic opportunities have defined my first semester at nd. when i first arrived, i thought i was going to make friends super easily because i have never been a shy person and have extensive experience meeting new people. instead, i felt nervous and worried during my first few weeks on-campus. a similar phenomenon is discussed by emery bergmann in her video on being a lonely college student. regarding her old hometown friends, she says, “they would post more and text me less.” i could sympathize with this because my friends from high school did not reach out when we went our separate ways, which was hurtful. when it came to making new ones, however, i was concerned that i would make bad impressions or seem too outgoing. i was able to overcome this challenge by getting out of my comfort zone and just striking up conversations with random people. what’s the worst that could happen… i’m at a university of over 12,000 people, after all! additionally, remembering that everyone is just as nervous as i am helped me immensely. since overcoming my fear, i have met unique people and made friends i would never have encountered otherwise. in moreau, we discussed the prominence of imposter syndrome at nd. the ted talk from elizabeth cox defined this phenomenon, and made my feelings more valid with mentions of famous and talented people like maya angelou experiencing the same insecurities. also hearing my peers in moreau talk about their struggle feeling inadequate made me feel much better and more accepted. knowing that i’m not alone and everyone else is adjusting too is comforting to hear. something that has been reaffirmed at my time here is my desire to love others and be a kind person. in his wesley theological seminary commencement address, fr. jenkins quotes the first letter of john: “for this is the message you have heard from the beginning: love one another.” i strive to live out this scripture in my daily life by being an empathetic person and not being too hard on or judgemental of others. the people who i have met here are incredibly special: kind, understanding, and welcoming, above all else. with the examples of these amazing individuals all around me, they urge me to be better. when faced with hate, or more simply, adversity, at college, i make the conscious choice to not respond with a bad attitude or more hatred, but instead forgiveness and hope. hate can only lead to more hate, and we as young people must be the ones to break the cycle and make the world a better place. remembering that god loves everyone and gave his only son for our benefit is another comforting thing i like to remind myself when i am faced with a hard situation or difficult people. my discussions in theology class whilst analyzing the christian religion and the bible have reaffirmed my core beliefs and made me a more loving catholic. hope, both for the future in general and my upcoming college years, has also been a positive of my first few months at notre dame. i have learned the invaluable importance of hope as i read more and more about how brutal the world can be and how mean-spirited people are, and how it is crucial for us to empower those without a voice and stand up for what is right. my favorite piece of wisdom from the article about holy cross and christian education is, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven.” by being a christlike example to others, we make the world a better place, one full of love for each other. if we can put our faith in god during the bad times and are able to look forward to the future, then anything is possible because of his plan. i have reminded myself of this multiple times this semester, primarily when i am missing my family or read an article about a tragic world event. i know that my family loves me and will be there when i get home, and i have hope that my notre dame peers and i will be able to change the world. an important aspect of college that i was not expecting to require a hard adjustment was my ability to manage my time. i thought, “high school was pretty difficult. this will probably be the same beast, just in a different place.” boy, was i wrong. i encountered a big challenge in time management during the first few weeks, finding it difficult to balance nrotc, classes, dorm activities, and my social life in addition to my personal mental health. despite feeling alone during these dark moments, i was able to find light in those who helped me by giving advice and reaching out. “hard experiences are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway to the real thing,” says parker j. palmer. academic difficulties that i thought would separate me from being at home here at nd actually brought me closer to my communities. i attended rotc tutoring sessions given by upperclassmen, which made me feel included and valued by the unit that i spend so much time with. i also confided in my ra, catie, who sat down with me and encouraged me to . i did not forcibly ask these communities (ryan hall and nrotc) to rally around me, but they did anyways, and i am grateful beyond words to have such caring and genuine people surrounding and working alongside me. i am constantly asking myself, “how can i give back to these communities and show them the love they have given me?” to conclude, my experience at notre dame has been full of ups and downs. however, despite the challenges, i have found myself gushing about my school to anyone who asks me or starts a conversation about it. this subconscious, automatic response and sense of pride i have in my school reassures me that i made the right choice, and i would not trade my decision for anything or any other college. i look forward to the rest of my time at school and the lessons i will learn, the people i will meet, and the unforgettable college experience that has already been so special to me. works cited week 9: “advice from a lonely college student” (emery bergmann, nyt) https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html; “what is imposter syndrome” (elizabeth cox, ted-ed) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo week 10: “wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” (fr. jenkins) https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ week 11: “thirteen ways of looking at community” (parker j. palmer, center for courage renewal) http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ week 12: “holy cross and christian education” (campus ministry, und) download holy cross and christian education.pdf moreau first year experience integration 2 november 27, 2021 encountering transformation the first semester at notre dame was a time of encountering change in many ways, but the starkest change that occurred was in myself. in the past couple months, i have been placed in so many situations that i could never have anticipated, and my reactions to them were equally surprising. even while i am writing this moreau, i am sitting in the living room of a friend that i met the first day of school. before i left for school, i never could have imagined that i would become so close to someone and be so comfortable with them that i would accept an invitation to stay with her family for thanksgiving. only this past summer i was vowing that i would do whatever it took to go home for thanksgiving, but here i am! i know that i will keep encountering people, places, things, and experiences that will transform who i am, yet now i welcome this uncertainty, as it’s all a part of growing and living. encountering dissonance has provided many opportunities for growth in these past few weeks. before coming to notre dame, i had never heard of the imposter syndrome, but various students and professors have been reminding our freshman class of it since welcome weekend. in such a prestigious school, feeling like you don’t belong is a real problem, as it can consume one’s thinking and severely harm self-confidence and motivation (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it? elizabeth cox youtube moreau fye week nine). switching between believing that i am here for a reason and i’m where i’m meant to be and despairing that i don’t belong here and i don’t have what it takes has been a weekly, if not daily occurrence. encountering dissonance has truly been a roller coaster, but i think this semester has really taught me how to deal with it. while it’s still a struggle, it is becoming easier to let go of the unrealistic expectations i have for myself and what life should be like, and this has brought a lot of relief and freedom (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan why letting go of expectations enables you to live a better life (grottonetwork.com) – moreau fye week nine). encountering brokenness has probably been the most obvious and frequent encounter i’ve had since coming to notre dame, and really ever since i’ve transitioned out of childhood into adult life. the more i learn about the world, the more i see how all hatred, division, fear, and suffering stems from a lack of love. fr. jenkins speaks to the need for a determined conviction for achieving love and unity, as there is so much division and misunderstanding in our society today even though everyone is searching for the same peace and love (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by rev. john i. jenkins, csc wesley theological seminary commencement | office of the president | university of notre dame (nd.edu) moreau fye week ten). indeed, i have met many people with extremely difficult backgrounds and experiences that are far more trying than my own. even in myself, i can see how the brokenness i’ve encountered in my own family and community has caused the brokenness i carry. the women who participated in the kintsugi workshop represented the process we all must go through to accept our own brokenness so that we can help heal the brokenness we encounter in the world (find healing in broken pieces through kintsugi art grotto network – moreau fye week 10). i have found that i need to be reconciled with the pain from my past before helping to heal others’ brokenness. encountering community has been one of the experiences that has kept me going even on the hardest days. the article we read for this week really stuck out to me because it proposed that a community was not something that needs to be worked for, but something that needs to be allowed to happen in a very natural way (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewalcenter for courage & renewal (couragerenewal.org) moreau fye week eleven). at notre dame, i have found a great group of friends with whom i have been able to build relationships without doing anything out of the ordinary. it’s been such a blessing to have a community in which just being myself leads to growing closer to friends that support and care about me, and i want to keep building and participating in this new family. encountering hope has been the most difficult task in this whole transition to college. throughout the moreau first year experience we have learned about the ideals of a holy cross education. all of these values culminated in our reading about hope in the last week, where the need for hope was emphasized because all the suffering in our lives threatens to destroy our inner peace and the confidence we have in god’s love for us (“holy cross and christian education” holy cross and christian education.pdf by rev. james b. king, csc moreau fye week twelve). my family has been going through a really hard time this year, and this struggle, combined with all the stresses of leaving home and learning to live on my own, has often left me feeling hopeless. however, with all that has happened, i have realized that without hope, life becomes impossible. we have to believe that hard things will get better and there is a purpose to every pain, for otherwise we will quickly lose our way and get caught up in the lie that nothing matters and all our suffering is in vain. by dedicating myself to faith, friends, and my studies, i know i will keep encountering hope despite the trials of life. with every encounter, i have been challenged to respond in a way that will strengthen my personal development. rather than being afraid of or avoiding change, i have learned that the best way to live is to embrace it. through encountering dissonance, brokenness, community, and hope, i know i will keep being transformed into the person i am meant to be. moreau final integration 2 12/03/21 moreau first year experience eric oswald my encounters and responses one of the most important questions i have asked this semester is the following: do i belong here? i have found that overwhelmingly, the answer is yes. in week 9 of moreau class, we learned about what imposter syndrome is. i learned that imposter syndrome is having feelings of fraudulence within one’s group. this definition can work whether it is applied to social groups, educational groups, or groups within one’s industry or workplace (“what is imposter syndrome?” elizabeth cox week 9 link). i found myself struggling with feelings like those found in imposter syndrome when working on and participating in my spanish class this semester. while i was confident in my abilities to understand spoken and written spanish, the class was very heavily reliant on one’s speaking abilities. because i had spent the past two years studying either remotely or with a hybrid learning schedule, i had not had a lot of practice with speaking spanish, especially conversationally. so i found myself comparing my level of speaking ability to my classmates, and convincing myself that since i was not the best at speaking in that class, i should not speak very often. of course, this plan of mine was not very conducive to learning how to conversationally speak the language, since the best way to learn and gain confidence is to practice. so once midterm participation grades came in and i had received a lower score than i would have hoped for, i realized that i needed to change my outlook on this situation. i told myself over and over and over again that i belonged to that class and that my input was just as valuable as someone else’s. i used the tools taught to me in my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/modules/items/109672 moreau class to combat these feelings of imposter syndrome, and i have since seen my participation in that class increase and my confidence has gone up in turn. i plan to use these same tools in the future to remain confident in my place at notre dame and beyond. the feeling of community has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far. in week 11 of moreau class, we read about different ways to view the concept of community. while all of these ways were interesting and definitely brought new perspectives to the topic, the first one really stuck out to me. it reads, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” parker j. palmer week 11 link). i had heard a lot about the dorm living system at notre dame before i got here, especially from my older brother who came here five years before i did. there is a lot of attention put on this system because it is often seen as a replacement for greek life, as notre dame does not allow students to have sororities or fraternities. i did not really know exactly what to expect, but to be honest, i did not think that my dorm experience would play as big of a role in my college experience as it has turned out to play. the quote from above about receiving community rather than achieving it is very applicable to my experience here at notre dame. since i was lucky enough to move into one of the halls that is old enough to have a lot of history and tradition, there was a big feeling of hall spirit as soon as i walked into my hall. the upperclassmen carried on the traditions that they learned as first years, and included us and made us feel very welcome in my dorm. i plan to do this for the next classes of first years so that i can make them feel the community in the hall as much as i do. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/modules/items/109697 hope, which was once an ambiguous and vague concept to me, has gained greater clarity through the self reflections and material in this course. in week 12 of moreau class, we read one definition of hope, which is “trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom” (“hope holy cross and christian education” fr. james b king week 12 link). the part that stuck out the most to me about this definition is trust. whether or not a person believes in god's plan, it is possible for that person to trust that things are on a certain course and that things must get better. sometimes, this trust is all that a person can have in order to keep going until the better things come their way. but without hope, there may be nothing. so we have to choose hope. unfortunately, i have had to choose hope recently when my brother went through a major life event a few months ago. two of his best friends passed away, and i was only able to be with him to grieve for a few days before i had to come back to school. i worried, and still do worry, about him a lot because i am not able to check on him as much as may be necessary. even when i can, it is hard to tell from such a distance how he is doing. my only way to deal with this is to hope i hope that he can grieve appropriately and then grow from this, i hope that the families of the boys find peace, and i hope that i find the strength to do all that i can to help in any way i can. i plan to continue this hopeful attitude towards this situation and other hard ones in my life in order to bring positive energy to everything i do. the idea of brokeness has become more nuanced as a concept for me due to course material. in week 10 of moreau class, we watched a video that explained the art process called kintsugi. it is an art form in which people repair broken ceramics or other materials with golden paint (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” grotto week 10 link). the idea behind this art form is symbolic of brokenness that can be healed. i related to the women in the video https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/modules/items/109703 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/modules/items/109684 because i understand the idea of feeling broken by a society who does not value a person like me as much as maybe it would someone of another gender. i have heard from a young age certain stories and topics about how girls are generally less safe in this world, and it would be easy to become bitter because of this. while it definitely took me a bit of working through such feelings, i now understand that healing from this brokeness can cause beautiful parts of me to show, just like the kintsugi heals broken parts of the ceramic pieces in a beautiful way. i intend to carry this lesson with me throughout my life in order to view broken things not as things that are broken forever, but as things that can be healed in beautiful ways. moreau integration paper victor m. trejo gonzalez victor m. trejo gonzalez professor andrew whittington moreau fys 10101 october 14th, 2021 equality through a moreau perspective i believe that equality is a fundamental human right that should be given to everyone regardless of their status and beliefs. growing up as a minority in a low income community one tends to experience a different perspective and view towards the world compared to someone who might have affluence and is not a minority. and, although i am not arguing for economic equality for all since that would be a hard battle to win, i am arguing that everyone should have the same basic needs and respect regardless of status. to begin, in the first week of this course we talked about the search for belonging, and in order to search for belonging within ourselves we need to also search for belonging within society. belonging is something we as humans crave and need because “connection is why we’re here, it's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” ("the power of vulnerability" by brene brown moreau fye week one) but when there is such a divide in the world based on race and other factors belonging becomes more complex because we cant even accomplish living amongst one another. i still to this day sometimes feel like i don't belong in a specific crowd or space because i feel like i don't belong and the only factor to blame is the lack of equality because sometimes i did feel like a second class citizen. to continue, the next topic we touched on in moreau was “searching for self-knowledge” and related it to how we need to seek to further fulfill our own understanding 1 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 and thirst for knowledge. for me, this topic can especially be seen when talking about equality and topics of such stratitude and importance because they peak my interest. we are creatures wired for fulfillment and like i have learned in moreau we have two sides to us: we have a “worldy, ambitious, external side” as well as a “humble side of our nature” ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two) that helps attract us to further our knowledge and in this situation for me i want to further my knowledge of myself and others in relation to equality because it is such a grave issue that needs to be fixed so that everyone is treated the same. furthermore, in week three our moreau lesson was based and tied to “searching for a framework '' which i interpreted as looking for the right time to prove ourselves through faith and without fear. this closely ties to my belief in equality because furthering equality is all about the right time frame and the right way to frame and plan out creating change for the better. for instance, equality is a very serious topic that oftentimes can get pretty controversial and in this case things need to be planned accordingly and slowly in order to actually create progress. “none of us get to escape the complexities that life has in store” ("the role of faith in our story" by campus ministry moreau fye week three) meaning that there is a said path in store for us by god and none of us can escape it but instead wait for it to unfold. i believe that my strong passion for equality and fairness is part of my path and that by being here at notre dame i will get to watch it all unfold and inspire me and others to grow within ourselves and as a collective. later, the next week in our moreau exploration we discussed relationships and how they can become toxic and what to look out for. this is a good topic and was a really great class because we got to listen to others perspectives about relationships and red flags. this lesson gave me a lot of insight because relationships are like a background to equality because it gives insight 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry into how people work and how they interact. for example, if i have diverse relationships then i am helping further the equality agenda because i am increasing equality, knowledge, and understanding which would not happen if i were to only have relationships with those who are alike to me. something interesting i learned in this lesson was actually that “assault can happen to anyone, anywhere, and by anyone” ("it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" by unknown author (google drive) moreau week four) which can be applied to relationships of course but could also be applied to inequality because it in a way assault’s society form being able to progress into becoming a unified society in which everyone is equal without hate. overall, being equal and fair helps us build great relationships and bonds as a society that helps us progress. in week 5 we talked about identifying narratives and overcoming them. in this lesson we can apply overcoming the obstacles and narrative of inequality and how equality could better benefit us into becoming a society that overcomes stereotypes and better into a respecting world. during this lesson we learned a lot from carla harris who to me is a symbol for equality because in her speech she does nothing but uplift everyone and talks about her hard work and dedication and overcoming of the odds. she said an amazing quote stating: “fear is just false evidence of things appearing real” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5) which is in a way how a lack of equality happens because of people's fear for change, reform, innovation,etc. the reason we as a society cant progress is because of people's false perception that stems from fear of what they deem a perfect society to be. as a whole we need to move forward and progress into an equal and fair world. now, in week 6 of our moreoau exploration we talked about ourselves and our story. this lesson was a really good one for me because it allowed me to explain a bit of my life and how i 3 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 struggled with fitting in because of my background of speaking both spanish and english. since in my childhood i was picked on for living a double life i never really fit in. this in a way kind of relates to why i'm so interested in equality because if it weren't for the lack of equality i experienced growing up i probably would not have been as invested in the topic because i would have not experienced it first hand. this can, for example, be seen in my poem in which i state that i “[feared] that one day both my worlds could collapse on me as i try[ed] to juggle assimilating into two different worlds. two different worlds that don't get along. two different worlds where i feel i don't belong.” ("where im from" by victor trejo moreau fye week 6) in this line you can sense the fear in me because i was tired of living in two worlds fearing that they would one day fall apart. as a final point, in our last and most recent lesson we discussed identifying perspectives and the dangers of the single story. which all correlate very well with the topic i have been discussing about why i believe in equality. in this lesson we watched a superb video in which i got the quote: “how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of a story” ("danger of the single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) which i interpreted to be how we can fall easily into prey of the single story because of how easily we believe stories told to us by others. the single story is very dangerous because it leads to stereotypes and racism which are some of the limiting factors in why equality is such a hard issue to reform and work on. ultimately, i believe that equality is a fundamental human right but our society is so corrupt and messed up because of racism, stereotypes, and of course the single story that it makes it hard to progress as a society. i am thankful for my moreau class because it has in a way taught me to get my ideas flowing and start using what i learn in class and apply it to other classes and other topics such as how i applied our various lesson of each week into equality. 4 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1f0eobpxc6q9wj2_xidzju-7dj7cflcdn/view?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story 5 what do i believe i believe that i grow from allowing myself to be vulnerable and putting myself in uncomfortable situations. like dr. brene` brown mentions in her video about vulnerability in week 1, i too don’t like the idea of allowing myself to be vulnerable either but i know that it is a great way for me to grow. in the video, she says “ i am enough” i believe that this is a huge thing to remember when it comes to putting yourself out there and searching for growth. knowing that no matter what anyone thinks or says or feels about me, i know that i am enough and this belief has helped make it to where i am now. i believe this because growth comes from trial. for example you only see mucule growth from breaking down and tearing that muscle so it can grow later stronger than it was before. its the same with allowing yourself to be vulnerable, after every time you do it you build more and more confidence in yourself to handle any situation that you would have been uncomfortable in previously. personally i’m not a huge fan of public speaking… it makes me really uncomfortable and vulnerable and i feel like i am being judged every second but because i have allowed myself to be in situations where i had to speak in front of a number of people , i have grown confidence in myself now and i know that i am enough and the thought of public speaking doesn’t bother me anymore. i believe that my propose is to spread the word of god and get as much people as possible into the kingdom of god. i believe that this is all of our purposes. in week 2 david brooks makes a statement that i disagree with completely. that statement was “nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime”. i believe that our whole purpose of being here on earth is to take advantage of this life time so that in the end we aren’t spending “eternity” in a place where no one wants to spend eternity. i believe that we can achieve the most important thing in our lifetime here on earth and that is accepting jesus christ as our lord and savior. furthermore, our purpose is to get our brothers and sisters to do the same so we can all spend “eternity” in heaven because that is his will for us. i have come to believe this because my parents have raised me to be this way. they each individually have had a rough past and would tell you themselves that they were lost without jesus until one day they both gave their life to god. they have told me stories of them in their youth and how life was hard. they have also told me stories of the miracles that god has done for them. this is a topic that i was naive of in my past year but now it clear to me because i have had my own instances where he has preformed micarles for me and i have felt him for myself. brooks talks about his friends idea of adam 1 and adam 2 and this is the reason why i believe that spreading the word as a brother or sister is very important. our world today is so full of the adam 1 and people often focus on the things of this world instead of the adam 2 who is much more enlightened. i believe that i am searching for god on a much deeper level now. this past year my understanding and knowledge and love for god has grown immensely. one part that has played a role in that growth has been nature. in the reading “ faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg in week 3, he says something that just strikes me as so true. he says that “everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary.” i love this quote because it is very true. i think it is especially true in terms of nature. i believe this because the wind and the beauty of nature always remind me of god which in turn directs me to turn and to search for more. for me sitting outside and reading the bible has been an effective way for me to search for whatever it may be that he wants to say to me in that moment. sometimes it is a time when i am confused or hurt. nature always reminds me of who is in charge and that results in me reading the bible and trying to see what he is trying to convey to me at that point in time. i believe that friends are an important part of individual well-being. in week 4 we talk about negative and unhealthy relationships and how they can affect our lives. this i why i believe that having a strong support system or having a strong group of friends is important. in the article “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” author olivia taylor has a quote that says, “the best kind of friendship are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face.” this is way i believe that friends are important because each one of mine have always been there for me during my hard times and are alot of the reason i am who i am. after each time we leave each other we leave with great memories and big smiles. it’s important because i know that these are friends that i know that i will have for the rest of my life. my time here at notre dame has made me reflect on that and the importance if it so now i am trying to create some of those same strong healthy friendships here that will last a lifetime. i believe that i am responsible for serving my brothers and sisters with love. in week 5 fr. kevin grove used a quote that says this ,“we cannot love the god, whom we do not see. if we don’t love the brother whom we do see.” this quote helps me believe that i am responsible for my brothers and sisters and in other words my community. the bible tells us to love our neighbor. so it is obviously to me that it is important to love like jesus did. this is a responsibility that i strive to get better at each day and over my time here i have gotten better at it. i’ve gotten better at just being there for whoever may need an extra hand or a shoulder to cry on or just a friend. i believe that remembering where i am from is a great way for me to keep moving forward. in week 6 we made a where i’m from poem that i really enjoyed and i believe that it reminds us of how far we have come and for me it serves as a reason i need to keep going no matter how hard my time here may get. i believe this because my past is the very reason i am the way i am today and my past serves as milestone in my life of what i’ve come from. it also reminds me of the goals i had back then when i was just a kid and also the people who are home that want to see me thrive in life. i believe that i pursue truth by keeping an open mind. in week 7 we see that how we may imagine a situation in a place to be could be very inaccurate as well as just jumping to conclusion instead of getting all the details so we can make an accurate observation or judgement based on what we know and not what someone else may have told us. chimamanda ngozi adichie, in her video makes it obvious that someone else point of view wrong or biased. i believe this because often times in this day in age lies are thrown at us from every angle and it can be hard to know if their are some truths in it or not. so keeping an open mind and not believing everything that is put in front of me without doing my own background is a good way to pursue truth. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) ( david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy? moreau fye week 2) “faith brings light to a dark world” (professor david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week 3) "5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (olivia t. taylor, grottomoreau fye week 4) "two notre dames: your holy cross education" (fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week 5) ( "where i'm from" (george ella lyonmoreau fye week 6) ( "danger of a single story" chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week 7) myfe integration 1 the beliefs that make up who i am and who i will grow into i believe that college should be a place of growth and vulnerability. in order to do this, i think the most important thing is to be my authentic self. dr. brown in her ted talk about the power of vulnerability states that “they were willing to let go of how they should be in order to be who they are.”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe that i fundamentally need to have self acceptance in order to grow. only then can i have a sense of belonging which i believe is different than fitting in. from my perspective, fitting in usually means that people are changing who they are in response to others. in order to feel belonging, people must feel comfortable as themselves. when you are not your authentic self, it will be a lot harder to find a sense of belonging. i also believe that my purpose in college and life is not only to work on building my strengths but to also really focus on my weaknesses. i want to combat my weaknesses until they too become strengths instead of simply letting them stay as weaknesses and never again be addressed. for example, after taking the via character quiz, i learned that my biggest weakness is what via categorizes as “love.” they describe it as “valuing close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing & caring are reciprocated; being close to people” (via character quiz moreau fye week two). this is obviously a skill that is very important now and later on in life so i want to be able to try to develop close relationships with people in order to develop this weakness. i also don’t solely want to focus on developing my resume or finding competitive internships but i also want to focus on personal development that may or may not be related to external desires. for example, i really enjoy my writing & rhetoric class that is focused on environmental and racial justice because i feel like i am better equipped to do good in the world. the same applies with going to department of sustainability meetings. i believe that i grow by opening my mind to new ideas. at notre dame, faith is a big component of student life, education, etc. being from a background of no faith, that can be somewhat intimidating at times. however, fr. pete gave great advice to “resist the temptation to compare yourself to what people profess to know and believe” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick csc moreau fye week three). by not being as intimidated, my foundations of theology class actually becomes very interesting and thought provoking. i feel like i am definitely growing as a learner by opening my mind to different perspectives. i also believe a major component of college life is about forging healthy relationships. while educational knowledge may start to fade over a long period of time, meaningful and healthy relationships will remain remembered. i feel like something that is super important is that your friends do not drag you down in any way. “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship,” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). i have made friendships where we inform each other about, for example, club opportunities and academic workshops. we encourage each other to grow academically. also, none of my friends peer pressure me into doing anything which is also a very good indicator that they respect me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org https://www.viacharacter.org https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ in the future, i will continue to actively look for people who exhibit qualities of respect, honesty, and independence. i also believe our community has a responsibility to look out for each other. i hope to contribute to an environment where people feel safe. i believe that it is fundamental to be able to adjust my viewpoint on life when things get difficult. especially in college, things can get overwhelming and obstacles can get in the way of succeeding. for example, i used to dread readings for classes because they took me so long and were not that exciting. i realized that having a negative mindset is not sustainable. i was able to change my perspective upon hearing “your ability to manifest your destiny, to find and fulfill your purpose lies in your ability to adjust your focus and sharpen your vision on the good and great things that are right in front of you and that are in store for you” (2021 laetare medalist address by carla harris moreau fye week 5). going forward, i will try to see failures or any setbacks as opportunities to grow. i believe that in addition to hearing other people’s viewpoints, it is also important to bring my authentic self to others and share about who i am, where i come from, and how those things have shaped me. not only does that mean you can help expose your peers to new perspectives, but it is also fundamental in developing healthy relationships. it is also very important not to forget or disregard “where you come from.” for example, i hope to not forget the “frustrations over unjust systems and triumph over collective action” (“where i’m from poem”, moreau fye week six) that i experienced throughout high school so that i can continue to use this part of my identity to do good. i believe that a huge thing that i need to focus on throughout college but also beyond is combatting the implicit biases that i hold. it is important to know that “the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau week seven). i feel like one of the best ways to combat this is to meet new people of diverse backgrounds and hear their stories. this will help me broaden my perspective and challenge my perceptions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aiye9o91_bimaoc_9lozn-eu7hwiljwcy98u-bek2js/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story intagration ii week 14encountering long lines at modern market as the semester is coming to a close, i now have a firm mental grasp on my life here at notre dame. i have dealt with success and failure both academically and through the sport of swimming. i believe our team has found their footing after the shake-up with our coaching staff. i have learned how to buckle down and actually study for my classes. i think moreau has given me a great opportunity to reflect and organize the thoughts i’ve had throughout the semester. at the beginning of the year, i created my goal sheet with what i wanted to accomplish both physically and academically. i wrote down some very hefty goals but i had to understand that they couldn’t happen overnight. “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan, moreau fye week 9). it is hard for me to relax sometimes and let go of expectations. i set a lot of goals for myself as a student athlete and i try not to back away from those that are challenging. my highschool coach would always tell me to shoot for twice as high as you originally were aiming in order to maximise your true potential. we recently had our first big tapered meet the weekend before thanksgiving break and i wasn’t satisfied with my performance. i don’t believe i went into the meet with unreasonable expectations, but i had to let go of the poor races and focus on what is ahead of me. i know i went to the meet and tried my best and that is all i can currently ask for. i always thought i was particularly good at putting those i'm talking to at ease. i try to be very welcoming in my conversations and make an effort to make the person feel valued and understood. i believe there is still an imbalance in everyone's ability to express their opinion and i do my best to give the quiet or shy people a chance to feel comfortable and represented. i am also aware of the racial injustices that are still prevalent in today’s society. “pope francis and catholic social teaching enjoin on us a responsibility to actively reverse systemic injustices that we have sadly inherited”(“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, moreau fye week 10). here at notre dame, i believe people are treated fairly and with respect no matter their race, religon, or sexual orientation. most importantly it is not just about what i think, as i fall into the huge majority of students who attend here. i have made close friendships with people from very diverse backgrounds who share the same love for this place as i do. they see this university as a home and they feel safe enough here to report a problem if one ever arises. i feel like i'm now an active and important part of many communities around campus. i’ve participated in many dorm activities and i'm happy to say that our quad’s common room now hosts people almost every night. we just had our sorin christmas decorating night and, surprisingly, it was one of my favorite events so far. “leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space in which human resourcefulness may be evoked” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i’ve learned who my close friends are in my dorm and i understand the friend groups that have formed. i do not believe that cliques are a negative thing, i think they are just a given product of human interaction. i have tried to be someone who doesn't care about these cliques, mostly because i am outside of a lot of the interactions as i don’t get to go to too many parties. i think i’ve created a welcoming place within my dorm for anyone to come by. we had our whole https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105279 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105279 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105304 hallway wrap doors in christmas wrapping paper and seeing everyone work together on the project strengthened our sense of community. i knew coming to college would be a fresh start for me but for some reason it just felt like i could go back home and resume high school. the team had to stay on campus for fall break so i had been counting down the days until i got to go home for thanksgiving. when i got to see all my friends, it was definitely enjoyable, but they had all seemed to change just a little bit. i guess i could’ve expected this to happen but it was especially odd because they all stayed in-state and a lot of them were at the same college. i’ve had a few low times since i’ve been here. nothing overly serious, mainly just homesickness and missing my friends. i believe the quote from “the screwtape letters” summarizes how i’ve dealt with these experiences. “he leaves the creature to stand up on it’s own legs-to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish. it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants to be” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis, moreau fye week 12). without fully realizing it, i had overcome my homesickness by simply moving on. i still have great relationships with my old friends but when i saw them over break it felt like i was trying to relive highschool moments with them. in my low times here at college i found new people who lift me up and have really found a new friend group. i still am dating the same girl long distance and it was such an incredible feeling to see her again. she is someone i haven’t moved on from and i hope we can continue to grow our relationship and carry it through college. i have hope that things will go well between us and we can still find ways to connect with each other when we are in our “trough” periods of life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105321 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105321 integration 2 fr. kevin moreau fys 30 november 2021 lose yourself, find your purpose even though the second part of this assignment is “what are you made of?,” i believe that this section is better if it is answered before “what are you made for?” the people around me, the events that have helped shape my credences, and life itself has driven me in a direction to find what i am made for. biologically, i am made of a clump of millions of microscopic cells, each functioning in their unique yet wholly necessary way to keep me alive. the people around me and the events i have experienced also fit this role; they have served in their own way to further sharpen my edges, further refining my characteristics as well as flaws. part of “refining” these flaws is going “going through adversity, and coming out stronger with well-rounded beliefs” (week 10). as i go through adversity, my beliefs become stronger which, in turn, makes me stronger for i am made of my beliefs. at notre dame, this could relate to my religious beliefs (which have been redefined) but also personal credences i hold. i have taken on a new meaning of relationships, moving on from having friends just to have them and toward finding people who help make me a better person. i often find myself in more diverse environments than i have ever been; “being given this opportunity at notre dame, to experience an environment where everyone is one the same level gives a sense of peace to the community” (week 11). with the absence of social barriers on campus, i am free to explore new people and new experiences. while the experiences of others can never fully be mine, i feel as if i find a new understanding with many of my peers on campus— an understanding that has helped me reach out of the bubble i was raised in. on campus, “it is the students’ responsibility to listen and experience other, new and true stories that they may have missed out on in the bubble the us has shaped us in” (week 7). it is important to note that it is not our fault for being raised in a bubble, yet it is important to realize and take advantage when you have the opportunity to pop it. however, the people and events i had in this people cannot be neglected; my family, and friends, and events during my childhood have, almost entirely, shaped me. my parents have gifted me with moral teachings and religion, pillars in my life that i hold myself as well as those around me to. my friends have most clearly what trust really means as any real relationship is built on this foundation. by this, i intend to show that friends, especially those who have betrayed my trust, has further helped me refine what it means to trust someone as well as the type of people who can be trusted. these relationships, ones that have been made and lasted or those that have been broken, unknowingly led me down a path to discover what i am made for, the purpose that i am still searching for at notre dame. as a child, i would have answered “what are you made for?” with, most likely, something along the lines of, “going to college.” now that i have done that, i find myself attempting to answer the same question as i have realized coming to notre dame is just one step in a larger process of finding my purpose. at first, i fell victim to imposter syndrome, doubting my ability to be a successful student at notre dame; i did not believe i was worthy. since then, i have learned “being worthy does not mean i believe i am perfect, it means i believe my imperfections are simply a part of what makes me worthy enough” (week 9). even in the medical field, what i might be interested in, i believed there was a perfection standard which, initially, pushed me away from the field. after reading complications by atul gawande, i learned that this standard is actually nonexistent. this novel, at times, highlighted the presence imperfections in medicine which helped me find (again) the interest i had for medicine that i had lost. so far, after going through internships and listening to friends’ parents, i have narrowed down my interests to oral surgery or orthopedics, two extremely different fields as well as paths. for oral surgery, that means dental school; for orthopedics, it means medical school. these options, thankfully, are farther down the road and i still have time to discover my purpose. as an eighteen year old, for all i know, it is possible that i don’t go into either or even the medical field completely. what i do know is that i want to put forward a concrete effort to help people, serve as a force for good. coming to notre dame and surrounding myself with students and professors who have the same goal in mind is only further pushing me in the right direction for that goal. ultimately, i want to build a resume built on virtues rather than accomplishments. while aspiring to be a doctor may be viewed as an accomplishment it can, if used the right way, serve as a virtue resume builder as it would give me the platform to assist those who are most vulnerable and, in turn, are in need of the most help. to conclude, i believe that finding my purpose involves “getting lost via exploration: taking an “odd” class, joining a new club, or surrounding yourself with different social groups is how you successfully lose yourself, which, by the end, should mean you find a more authentic version of yourself” (week 2). once one discovers the authentic version of themselves, it is then when they can understand what their purpose is as a member of a community and, larger, as a member of society. integration one moreau integration one 15 october 2021 the me you don’t see root beliefs 1. i believe that i am searching for life-giving relationships where i feel it is safe to be vulnerable. (weeks 1, 2, and 4) 2. i believe that through faith, i can ease my anxiety and move forward from difficult situations even when i don’t see a clear path out. (week 3) 3. i believe that i have been formed to be a force for good in the world. (week 5 and 6) 4. i believe that i pursue truth by being mindful that my experience of the world is different from others’ experiences, and that my perception is not always telling the full story of a situation. (week 7) belief 1: i believe that i am searching for belonging in life-giving relationships where i feel it is safe to be vulnerable. i have had both good and bad experiences with friendship, experiencing not only life-giving relationships but also toxic relationships. i had a lot of friends that fit the signs of being a toxic friend, particularly “they don’t really listen to you” which was number two on the list from one of the week four resources (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). because of this, i have struggled, and still struggle at times with being vulnerable, and feeling like i belong. i often worry, “is there something about me that, if other people know it or see it, that i won't be worthy of connection?” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). the ted talk by brené brown summarized my feelings very well in that quotei was, and continue to often be worried about whether or not people really like me. i have encountered these feelings occasionally this semester as i’ve started forming new friendships. in the past, when my friends would be toxic and not listen to me, i would feel like they really didn’t care or enjoy my company. fortunately, as i have grown and gotten older i have been more able to recognize that i am someone that is likeable, though i still sometimes feel irrational doubt and anxiety about this fact. the character strengths quiz was another affirming resource that was helpful in boosting my self-confidence; my top strength was kindness (via character strengths quiz by the via institute on character moreau fye week two). i know that being kind is one way to be a good friend. as i am evaluating which relationships to put further effort into, i search for other kind people who i can be vulnerable with. because of my negative experiences in the past and anxiety about my likeability, i tend to be relatively guarded about forming close relationships in which people really get to know me beyond a superficial level. my instinct to be guarded is what led to my title “the me you don’t see” which gets at the idea that i’m not vulnerable with a lot of people, so there’s a lot of me that i don’t readily share with others. however, as brené brown articulated, the people who felt worthy of love and were able to more readily make connections with others were those who understood vulnerability was “necessary” and are “willing to invest in a https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup relationship that may or may not work out,” so i am growing towards being more vulnerable with more people in my quest for finding life-giving relationships (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). belief 2: i believe that through faith, i can ease my anxiety and move forward from difficult situations even when i don’t see a clear path out. i’m not someone who is religious, but i still have faith. like it was said in the article, “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). i approach the world with the perspective that i am merely one person of many on this planet, and that gives me faith when times are difficult. i know that even when my life isn’t going well, there are billions of other people who are continuing to go about their lives. they may be struggling like me, which brings solace, or they may be thriving, which brings me the opportunity to join them in their thriving. either person could be an opportunity out of my strugglethe fellow struggler and i could work together to find our way out, and the thriver could help pull me out of my struggle. there are endless possibilities when the world has 7 billion people. i also believe that among those 7 billion people, there are more good people than bad, so my odds are never as bad as they may initially seem. i approach the world with that optimism about possibility, faith in humanity as mostly good, and with the humility of knowing that the world does not revolve around me. that faith and optimism also helps me to ease my anxiety. when it feels like the world is ending, i remind myself that there’s always a way forward, even if i can’t see it yet. belief 3: i believe that i have been formed to be a force for good in the world. in reflecting on where i came from for my poem, i was reminded of the stories i tell others and myself about my life and where i come from. fr. kevin grove said that “we believe that there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing,” and i believe he is right (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). when i had less confidence, i would tell myself that i was unliked, or incapable, and my failures felt like proof that i was and would always be some version of bad. but, now i feel that failure is an important part of success, like fr. kevin grove said in his speech. before, i cognitively understood how failure was important to successi understood it in an abstract way. after overcoming significant failure (with grace, partly) i was able to really understand the importance of failure to success. i think that coming to a greater understanding of failure has helped form me into a compassionate person. i’ve always felt compelled to help others and be kind, but with greater self reflection have gained the conviction to be assertive about stepping in when something was happening that i believed was wrong. i think that’s the difference between just being nice and actually being a force for good. the article about the poem said, “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on,” which before i was more confident in myself, made me feel like as an individual, i was inadequate (“where i’m from” by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html george ella lyon moreau fye week six). but, once i understood myself better and became more confident, i saw my difference and uniqueness as a strength, not a weakness. that perspective shift has been an important part of how i view myself even when i don’t feel confident or successful, and helped to catalyze me to be a force for good even when i’m feeling insecure. i believe my growth in confidence and self-knowledge directly impacts my ability to be a force for good, because if i don’t believe in myself, i can’t be nearly as impactful. belief 4: i believe that i pursue truth by being mindful that my experience of the world is different from others’ experiences, and that my perception is not always telling the full story of a situation. i talked about it some in other belief paragraphs, but i have a belief that every individual has a unique perspective. that different perspective changes a lot about how you see yourself, the world around you, and others. i understand that i have implicit bias that informs and influences my perspective, and understand that “the same thought processes that make people smart can also make them biased” (“how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). knowing that i am biased doesn’t scare me, or make me feel defensive. instead, i am committed to being open-minded about my beliefs and claims because what seems or feels true may not always be supported by facts. truth is more than what ‘seems right’ to me. i know that truth is more than any one person’s perception, and that it is possible to miss sides of a situation depending on my perspective. i believe that moving through the world with the knowledge that i might be wrong is important to being a good person. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ moreau integration 1 sandy nam nam 1 seungyeon nam professor espeseth moreau fye 15 october 2021 live love, love life frankly, i would be lying if i said i was happy to take the moreau course as a sophomore, when i had already moved on from my first experiences and interactions as a freshmen and was ready to embrace the next step. yet, i came to accept the fact that it was still technically my first year on campus. surprisingly, through the weekly moreau reflections, i had time to reflect on my own beliefs and values that i had developed over my time at the university. moreover, i could realize how much i had grown over my past semester here. i developed personal beliefs, values, and life goals that i now look forward to, which are definitely not permanent but things that i currently live based upon and drive my life. something i have come to believe as an international student living abroad—apart from close families, friends, and surroundings—is that having a healthy source of love is integral to life. last semester, when i came to notre dame, i was very lonely. covid-19 not only generated physical diseases but also emotional ones. social distancing and masks made me struggle to build new relationships and form friendships. therefore, i tended to get depressed a lot, but my friends and families through zoom was where i found comfort as i adjusted on campus. the love i found in such connections was what supported me. “to love is to will the good of another” (faith brings light to a dark world by professor david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week three). this quote reached out to me because i have been searching through the different definitions, both subjective and objective, of love for a long time. especially after coming to the https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 nam 2 u.s. and being reliant upon the power of love, i was motivated to discern what love truly is. david brooks also said that forgiveness is another expression of love: “...we must be saved by the final form of love, which is forgiveness” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks, tedmoreau fye week two). with reference to both professor david fagerberg and david brooks, i have concluded that love unconsciously drives a deep sense of empathy for another. with love, we come to stand in another’s shoes (at the end), and we need such support and understanding from another in our lives. love is something we live for and can’t (shouldn’t) live without. all healthy relationships involve love as an important element. it’s a selfless support and a wholesome emotion, a connection between people that we need to feel alive. in order to have love, you need someone to love or to be loved by (i.e. relationships). here, i believe that relationships require effort. something i have noticed after coming to college was that some relationships inevitably fade away. they were relationships that i didn’t put effort into, relationships that i later realized were people i didn’t care about or didn’t care about me. healthy forms of love do not arise from shallow or unhealthy relationships. they naturally emanate from relationships i would return to just because i understand the value and importance within it. after all, love is a strange thing. it is an intangible component of our life that we yearn for, share with, and sometimes get scarred from. when we love someone, we naturally desire reciprocity of such devotion, whether it be from a partner, a family member, or friends. yet, if such reciprocity turns out to become a tool for abuse, love begins to sharpen and widen our vulnerability to others. it is such a delicate emotion that is hard to control and, therefore, requires proper manner of delivery and acceptance. love can never be a reason for abuse, control, or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim nam 3 manipulation. as powerful as it can be, it should always be shared in a healthy and equal behavior. love is a justification for connection, not manipulation. one must realize that love arises from relationships. relationships should not arise behind the mere wording of ‘love’. “because i love you” is never enough to continue unhealthy relationships ("because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation moreau fye week four). relationships first, love after; to reach love, a relationship requires reciprocal efforts. it is hard to find love in relationships. what’s even harder is to build any relationships in the first place. as i had said before, my initial experience on campus was slightly depressing in terms of social life. for campus life, i expected multiple friendships and social interactions that would fill up my life, but it was quite the opposite. and i tended to blame the circumstances a lot: mid-year, covid-19, and winter. however, spending my second semester on campus, i have realized that i should be the one held accountable for my relationships. “they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful...they talked about it being necessary.” (the power of vulnerability by brené brownmoreau fye week one). i was hesitant to reach out to others because i was scared they might not reciprocate or take me as a weird individual. willingness to invest in something that was open-ended and willingness to reach out without expecting anything in return is something i have feared of. nonetheless, it is necessary to overcome such fear to live the social life i’ve dreamed of. this semester, i have taken the role of an ‘international ambassador’, which allowed me to practice such skills to people coming to campus. through the experience, i’ve made so many connections with friends that i was able to develop some among them into deep connections i value. vulnerability is certainly a skill of courage that would open one’s doors to many more connections and opportunities. one thing i realized was that such vulnerability comes under the umbrella of open-mindedness. “unfortunately, we can’t https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o nam 4 conclude that: many of us are more biased than we realize. and that is an important cause of injustice—whether you know it or not.” ("how to think about 'implicit bias'" (by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week seven). it is hard to trace our heads back to the truth sometimes, as it is often obscured by our own disbelief upon personal corruption and ill-nature. i have also avoided a part of me who had the initial condescending reactions or ready assumptions on particular types of people because i knew it was a bad habit. however, i think the best way to handle myself and such biases is to confront it. while we should accept the fact that such thoughts inevitably arise in our brains as human nature, it is our responsibility and accountability to choose how we would act upon it. i believe that this way, i can only make my opportunity window wider and myself more accessible to others. throughout my integration assignment, i have mainly talked about my beliefs upon love and relationships. it wasn’t necessarily about how i can do better in my academics or succeed in school. that was because of this one belief i was inspired by, “our lives are not our resumes” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). prior to college, i would consider myself as a calculative person. i thought i needed to be calculative in all aspects of life, even kindness and relationships, in order to succeed. now as a college student, even with a bigger future goal (medical school) and more tasks on my plate, i no longer think that mere calculations and materialistic interaction in life are what fulfills my life as a human being. being alive is much more than the cold words of ‘success’, ‘money’, or ‘first place’. in order to live life, i believe that i should not fixate on resumes or accomplishments. i can have a materialistic goal, but that should not triumph over my invaluable treasures of life: love and people. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 how i have changed since coming to notre dame moreau integration assignment two: do i really belong here? (week 9) during week nine, i was definitely in a mood and based on my comment in the q.q.c., it wasn’t a good one. pulling from a quote in the tedtalk, “albert einstein considered himself an ‘involuntary swindler’, or someone whose work didn’t deserve as much attention as it had received.” i remember finding this quote so relatable, especially in my sport. when i was in high school, i was one of the best and now that i’m here, i am constantly getting my butt kicked in workouts. it honestly is really great for me to be able to have such an amazing team and group of girls who support and push me to get better, but it hurts. a lot. sometimes, i ask myself if i belong here or not (i know many other students do too), and it’s hard to find that reason to justify that i do sometimes. but just the fact of knowing everyone is genuinely feeling the same is oddly comforting. now that i’ve been here for almost a whole semester, i know that notre dame has and will continue to put me through challenges that are going to hurt. a lot. but it will also shape me into the best version of myself. so in short, yes i do belong here. i tend to overthink and get in my head if things start to reach the limit of stress i can handle, which i still need to work on. but what i’ve found interesting is that since i’ve come to notre dame, my work ethic for studying and allocating time to do my work has changed dramatically. i was always someone who studied the night before and held off on doing my homework until i needed to, and now that has had to change to stay on top of the workload. (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau f.y.e. week nine) how can we get along if people believe different things? (week 10) several weeks ago, the irish rover posted an article titled “no man can serve two masters by mary frances myler, and it was very controversial and hurtful, to say the least. this article was a perfect example of fr. jenkin’s quote that i used in the q.q.c., which was “hatred poisons everything.” it was so bizarre to read an article that spoke down upon our lgbtq+ community on campus and how the university celebrated national coming out day. seeing how sad my lgbtq+ friends were after reading the article was heartbreaking and something that i hope others don’t have to experience. i understand people can have their own opinions on things, but this made me sick to my stomach. it is totally normal for someone to have a friendly discussion about politics and beliefs but when it comes to tearing someone down for who they are or how they identify is where things need to change. people fear things they don’t understand, so having these discussions about beliefs and thought processes will really help open people’s minds and create less animosity, or at least, that is the hope. (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau f.y.e. week ten) coexisting can be hard but being alone is harder (week 11) an excellent example of community is your dorm. i live in johnson family, and it is incredible! the hall is so nice, and i am very grateful to live here (especially with a.c. and great common rooms). but even so, parker j. palmer’s quote, “we will never walk through that gate if we cling to a romantic image of community as the garden of eden,” is spot on when it comes to living with a complete stranger. at first, my roommate and i didn’t get along. sure, we did the same things since everything was so new, but we both have our little quirks and beliefs that made living together tense. one of the things was early in the semester when i had to wake up early for practice (beat the heat). those first few weeks were relaxed and low stress, so she would be out until sometimes 4am and come back into the room loud with the lights on. i, of course, needed to wake up at 6am so getting woken up like that was not ideal. but at the same time, i know she would be frustrated because i would go to bed at 11-12 and she would have to deal with having to sneak around the room. once the weather started cooling off and we got to know each other better, things dramatically changed and now we’re doing great! we understand how the other does things and when their schedules are now, we’re in a great place. (“13 ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer – moreau f.y.e. week eleven) trying something new is always worth it (week 12) since i have been here at notre dame, there have been several times where things come up where i have the choice to move past my comfort zone and try new things/make memories or let those moments slip away. to be fair, i don’t say yes to everything but for instance, i have tried some new things. there are always blood drives that are being held on campus. whenever i can, i help check people in as a service opportunity and to do something different. one of the days, i didn’t have scheduled practice, so i had the chance to donate blood. this would be the first time i would be able to do this, and it was always something i wanted to do but with being in season, i never could. with this idea in mind, i asked some of my friends if we all wanted to try and donate together. partially to bring in more people (but also because i was too scared to do it myself). unfortunately, my friends turned it down, but i ultimately decided to do it anyway, so i signed up. fr. james b. king said, “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know.” in the context of my story, this quote supports that it’s obviously a necessary good to donate blood because it helps those around us, even if i was very nervous. the fun thing is, it wasn’t that bad. i was a little nauseous, but in the end, i donated a bag of blood, and a week later i found out my blood type (a-), which is something i didn’t know before donating. it’s insane how it’s already the end of the semester. so many memories have been made and it makes me feel excited for what else is to come! i find myself calmer, more understanding, and less emotional (believe it or not) than i was at the beginning of the semester. i was always so quick to cry about things, but now that i’ve been here (i have still cried a little), in many cases, i feel like i don’t have time because i need to continue to get through the week and that’s been something that works for me. i’m grateful to be at notre dame, and i plan to take as much advantage of the time i have here to create even more memories. (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b., c.s.c. – moreau f.y.e. week twelve) week 8 integration 1 moreau growing mentally throughout my first two months at notre dame, i was given the chance to literally become a new person. all the stereotypes that i held on to as a high schooler, all the traits that i was connected to, and the person that others perceived me as were wiped clean. i could start from scratch, but i realized that it was easiest to be myself. however, notre dame, in is a much different environment than san diego, ca. would i fit in, and would i connect with people? “is there something about me that [makes me] unworthy of connection?(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) what makes me, me may or may not be appealing to others. for this reason, it can be difficult for some to “fit in” when they move somewhere else or go off to college. the idea of social acceptance is extremely important in the world and can be applied to other animals, not only humans. our need to belong and be accepted by others is something taken very seriously whether we want to or not. i can choose to act as myself, or through another personality that i think will make me appealing to others. believing in yourself that you are enough requires a lot of confidence. through this mentality, i believe that i am content with my identity. if i already act how i wanted people to perceive me, why did i become a new person regardless of the fact that i didn’t consciously act differently? some examples are stereotypes that stuck. i once was a 4’11” freshman in high school. because of that, i was always “short”. now that i’m in a new environment, nobody has really made a comment since my height isn’t that unusual anymore. how new people view me from the outside is different than how i see myself. “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two)” every person is perceived differently, and one of my friends most likely thinks of me in an entirely different context than another friend does. i believe that i grow mentally, as experiences shape my view and attitude. part of the reason i attended notre dame was to put myself in a different situation and get away from home. by gaining a new perspective, i would grow as a person. discovery of myself, as i learned to grow as a person away from home, and discovery of the world and people around me. i still believe that over 50% of college is learning to live in the real world, and not just learning for a profession. i chose to attend notre dame because i believed it would best prepare me for the world in more ways than one. “the most important thing in life is the journey of self-discovery. (“the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three)” father pete connected self-discovery, especially through faith, to untying a knot in your shoelaces. everyone’s journey is different, and even problems that arise more than once need to be approached in different ways. meeting new people and going about life with a different routine has changed me as a person, and i believe that it is for the better. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28314/modules/items/105568 meeting other people has been the most unique, exciting, time consuming, and fun thing about college so far. friendships form in the most unique and unthinkable ways, and it’s likely that some will last for a lifetime. friendships range from meeting someone at a party, to sitting next to them in class, to living under the same roof with them. “the best kind of friendships are the ones … knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships by the red flag campaign moreau fye week 4) if both people are improving and becoming better people by surrounding themselves with positivity and success, everyone wins. undoubtedly, college is the best place to find these types of friendships. you go to a school with people that are like-minded, for the most part. you know that the people that attend notre dame are intelligent; academically and otherwise. it brings people together not by chance, but by the effort and talent they have put in over the course of their lives. i believe that friendships formed here are special not only because of the person, but the community that surrounds them. especially in the social environment today, it becomes increasingly difficult to find someone that sees eye-to-eye with you, some even going as far to attempt to worsen your life because of differing views. i have found, however, that in the community of notre dame, the majority of people will set differences aside. notre dame itself is a catholic school, but those who do not share its views are encouraged in their own way. “we cannot love the god whom we do not see, if we do not love the brother whom we do see.” (two notre dames your holy cross education by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5) this is an especially powerful statement, as it shows your actions in the world are what really reflect who you are. whether you believe in one kind of afterlife or another, or even none at all, your actions on earth will show who you really are as a person. i believe that my actions make me who i am, and i will treat everyone with similar respect. as referenced previously, it is good to assume that everyone means the best and tells the truth. we hope that others mean the best, even when they may hurt another in the process. as humans, it is moral to behave in a way that is peaceful to all. sometimes this is not possible, and it is an entirely different philosophical conversation about what is moral and what is not. “it isn’t nice to think that we aren’t nice.” (how to destroy truth by david brooks moreau fye week 7) truth is a slippery slope of psychology, philosophy, and ethics. truth can be subjective, and truth can be different to other people. for this reason, we must ask ourselves what our truth is, and have the knowledge that our truth is likely different from our friend’s truth. i believe that i can learn from others by understanding their differences and growing from them. moreau integration 2 integration 2 assignment moreau first year experience 12/3/21 throughout my life, i have continued to understand that each experience can have multiple different outcomes based on the way that i perceive and respond to them. i have come to know that perceptions can have a deep impact on the way one reacts to a situation and also can provide a catalyst to a new outlook on life that one may not have thought of previously. during this semester, this idea is extremely prevalent in my life and i have come to know that the way i respond to something can have a deep impact on myself and future experiences. my experience at notre dame has come with great achievements and also big adjustments that have caused me to develop a deeper understanding of myself but have also strengthened my faith in god. my experience in college has caused me to look deeply into my relationship with god and further understand his plan for me and ways i can further develop a community of god while a student at notre dame. during the past four months at notre dame, i have learned the importance of the role that resilience and hope plays in fostering a community that involves unity and faith. as a student, resilience has played a major role in helping further my academic career by constantly being open and being able to adjust to the new unexpected situations that are placed in my path. through being resilient, i have the ability to develop a deeper sense of hope for what is to come in the future and also be hopeful for god’s unique plan for me. these experiences have emboldened me to further enhance the notre dame community through furthering the recognition of god’s presence within each person i encounter as well as developing relationships that are meaningful and fruitful. therefore, my experience at notre dame has led me to be even more resilient in situations but has also guided me to be hopeful for the new experiences that god brings forth and has provided a compass in creating a community of unity and love. the past four months have truly involved self development and also have guided me to enhance a deeper understanding of myself through my faith and developing relationships with others. whether it was through adjusting to the new college environment of living away from home or living with someone i did not know very well, each of these experiences have taught me the importance of being resilient and embracing each situation that god brings me as a blessing and a part of his plan for me. this has truly guided me to further foster a deeper relationship with god and further understand who god is calling me to become. this was further discussed in week 9 of moreau, in which the class highlighted the importance of being relient and trusting in oneself during different situations. in an article written by julia hogan she states “ trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9). this quotation truly exemplifies the importance of recognizing oneself and being resilient through developing a sense of trust in one’s actions. this has truly been prevalent in my life because during my experience at notre dame i have come to know that to truly embrace the college experience, i have the responsibility to first seek to understand my genuine, unique qualities and remove the fear of what others will think of me. through being able to understand and embrace my unique qualities, i am able to further develop a deeper relationship with god and also understand the importance of hope. throughout my life, i have always understood the importance of hope but i have come to know that hope provides the light during a situation that seems to be engulfed in darkness. i have realized that hope involves being able to recognize god’s presence and understand his plan for me. through being able to recognize the presence of hope, i have realized that it leads me to develop a different perception of the situation and understand that it is part of god’s plan. one experience in my life that truly exemplifies this was when a member of my class this past year, maria middleton, passed away due to a brain tumor. during the time leading up to and after her passing, each member of our class was deeply upset and felt a tremendous amount of grief over the loss of one of our “sisters”. however, maria’s family truly provided a sense of hope during this dark time in which they continued to exemplify their overwhelming faith in god and their trust in god’s plan for maria. even after maria’s passing, maria’s parents comforted each classmate and continued to provide words of hope and compassion during this difficult time. although https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau this experience was truly difficult, maria’s parents continued to use resilience as a compass in searching for hope that brought light during this dark time. this truly impacted me because it helped me understand god’s role in hope and the overwhelming influence that faith can have on the outlook of a situation. this was further discussed in week 12 of moreau in which rev. james king states, “-the conviction that the son of god died willingly, even for the sake of those who persecuted and abandoned him, in order to bring us through darkness to glory” (holy cross and christian education by rev. james king c.s.c moreau fye week 12). this quotation truly exemplifies the role that faith plays in developing a sense of hope even in the most difficult situations. jesus completed the ultimate act of love by sacrificing himself on the cross in order to bring each of us on earth out of the darkness and into eternal light with him in heaven. this idea has truly impacted my outlook on life especially during my time at notre dame. the past four months have brought joy, stress, new friendships, and a deeper sense of faith. each of these experiences have led me to develop a deeper sense of resilience but also view each situation that i encounter with a sense of hope. through being able to recognize hope, i have the ability to change my entire outlook on a situation and even my life. through recognizing my own self development and also understanding my ability to be resilient and further grow my sense of faith, i have the ability to help foster a community that involves unity and kinship throughout the world. during my time at notre dame, i have been able to experience the sense of community that is extremely strong at the university. however, i have come to know that i have the responsibility to help foster this sense of community and further the community through enriching the unity at notre dame. this was further exemplified in week 10 of moreau in which father jenkins describes, “we cannot proclaim the love of god in christ without seeking the unity of all christians”(wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. john jenkins c.s.c -moreau fye week 10). my experience at notre dame has truly taught me the importance of fr. jenkins’ message of seeking love through unity. one experience that truly exemplifies this is through my experience as a reader at the basilica. as a reader, i have the responsibility to engage the congregation in understanding god’s message that he calls each of us to proclaim. each time i read, i continue to feel this overwhelming https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ sense of unity and community in the basilica as each person listens intently to what was being proclaimed. this sense of unity emboldened me to further that throughout my daily life by recognizing the presence of god within each person i encounter and being open to the unique qualities and ideas that each person possesses. community truly involves fostering a sense of hope for furthered unity among all individuals. in moreau week 11, parker j palmer suggests, “this simple fact has critical implications: community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmermoreau fye week 11). this quotation emphasizes the idea that community is truly a “gift” from god and should therefore be embraced and furthered. my experience at notre dame has truly guided me to develop a deeper appreciation for each blessing and opportunity that has been offered to me, however the notre dame community has continued to encourage me to foster the unity that has been established and further it through my own unique way. i am truly hopeful for the next four years and i look forward to what god has in plan for me, and i plan to continue to strengthen the community through trusting in myself and seeking goodness. therefore, my experience at notre dame has taught me to be resilient but has also guided me to use hope as a compass in fostering and furthering the unity that is a hallmark of the notre dame community. through being resilient, i have the ability to look at each experience in a more positive and hopeful lense. through using hope as a source of strength and comfort, i am able to further recognize god’s presence in every aspect of my life. hope can truly play a major influence in fostering community through faith and seeking unity among all individuals in community. through being able to embrace my faith, i have the ability to make a positive difference in the world and create a community of kinship in god’s name. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ grace mckenna professor taylor moreau experience 24 november 2021 “when life gives you lemons make some lemonade:” responding to difficult situations change is always difficult. most times people choose to stay in comfortable positions so they know they can succeed. however, in order to fully grow as a person, one needs different situations to push them to be better. it is in these hard times that what one encounters and how they respond defines who they really are as a person. during the transition to college, lucky for a freshman like me, i have a huge support system and many before me who bestow advice and put me in situations to succeed. yet, i have still been faced with many challenges that have caused me to think about my response and how that has affected not only me but also the people around me. as people we all make mistakes, have doubts, and question others and our decisions; however, with hope and the knowledge we have from a notre dame education i am confident we all can become better students and people. as a gateway student one of the biggest questions i have asked myself all semester is why do others treat us differently or feel the need to express in a subtle, or even at times obvious way, that they are better than us. i am always proud to say i am a gateway; however, when many notre dame students relate gateway students to “those who go to holy cross,” i feel underappreciated and unwanted. they treat us differently, just like they treat st. mary’s girls differently, when they don’t even know us. people just need a new perspective where “each story must be heard as the larger story” ("with voices true snapshot summary" by klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). no one should be judged by where they come from, their values, where they go to school, or anything for that matter. we all have a different story to tell and should respond by simply listening and understanding. i know gateway students who have sacrificed so much and are working even harder than most to live out their dreams, i know holy cross students who are as qualified and smart as us all, and st. mary’s girls who got into notre dame but decided to go to smc because they received a full scholarship. no one knows everyone's stories and therefore should not jump to conclusions or set comparisons. in reality, we all are different, but on the tri-campus, we are all the same--students looking to reach a new horizon of knowledge in order to excel in the future. in addition to the importance of creating a non-judgmental community, many need to understand that though nd is a catholic and promindominalty white institution, it is extremely important to respect all different views and cultures. in the 21st century we are a world divided in many ways--through race, gender, ethnicity, age, etc. even at nd people are separated because of multiple issues. many use social media as an outlet to express their opinions. the new app, yikyak, has caused many situations of cyberbullying and spreading hate anonymously. however, the people who are impacted don't care who wrote it, they just want it to stop. when it comes down to it, no matter what you believe, students should remember “love is the greatest commandment--and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.moreau fye week 10). it is easy to share a hand, spread a smile, and simply respect people the way you want to be treated. all students are in this together and should lift to motivate and inspire each other instead of tearing them down. however, it is easy to get caught up in those comparisons and setting high expectations for yourself even during a stressful transition into college. coming from a small high school, it was easy to excel and be a leader. i was able to be involved in so many clubs, teams, and sports all while having plenty of time to do well in school and balancing social life. my expectations for college were the same; however, in reality have proven extremely different. i found myself having little time, making it difficult to juggle the workload and rotc, while not doing my best in school itself. i realized i was, “living my life according to the expectations of others and myself” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9) instead of working to adjust and found myself. college is different from high school and instead of dwelling on them i need to accept them. and now that i have, i am doing better mentality and academically. as a result, it is clear to me that through all the obstacles, i truly do belong at notre dame and part of the gateway community. at first i was hesitant and had many doubts because compared to everyone else i was definitely the small fish in the big pond; however, through pushing myself and striving to do my best every single day, i know that i can do anything my peers can do. though we all have our strengths and weaknesses, i will continue to focus on myself in order to grow. just like “moreua felt called,”(“hope holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king, c.s.c.moreau fye week 12). i too felt the call to attend nd and join rotc. i would see signs on the highway that said gateway or see military officers randomly walking around my town. at first i thought they were just coincidences, but they became so frequent that i soon realized it was a call. now, with a lot of hope and determination, i can confidently say that i made the right decision to follow that call. there is no other place and people that make me happier. in conclusion, it is important to carry the values of respect, equality, and hope i have learned into my college experience. without them, i am lost as a person. through my foundation, notre dame has helped me grow in many ways already, especially when it comes to understanding the importance of diversity, finding one’s purpose, and pushing past expectations of others. hope and my faith will continue to guide my future through every situation i am put in. for the truth is, no matter what i encounter i am so thankful to be here at this magical place. finding myself by if a eulogy is a commentary on how a person lived their lives, then i am scared to write my own. i’m not worried about what people would say. i am not a bad person, and my actions aren’t reflected as one either. it is probably the opposite. i am confident that at funeral my parents and friends would have only good things to say about me. i really am not worried about what people would say. what scared me most is that they would say the wrong thing. the wrong thing? i am not even sure i really know what that means. but i am not concerned with figuring that out fight now. i only want to focus on what i am sure of, and i’m sure there is off with me. i’m not ashamed to say it anymore, but i am not happy. my unhappiness arises from the one simple fact about the unhappiness of all men– “that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer – moreau fye week 1. i tend to overthink, and it causes me a lot of stress. i was not always this way though. i turned anxious throughout my life, during a process that i did not know was happening, and when i finally realized it, i was too late to stop it. since then i have been living with my anxiety, aware of it, and trying my hardest to unlearn it. while doing so, i have realized that i am not the same person as i was a kid. now i realize that everyone changes, and no one ever is the same, but i know what i feel, and that’s why i’m scared people will say the wrong thing at my eulogy. all my actions, all my words, all my doings, although they are not bad or mean or anything like that, do not feel like an authentic expression. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the past year and a half of my life i have been focusing all my effort on trying to find myself again, and it’s a process that i have learned a lot from. the beginning was all about me and by myself. for a long time, finding myself was something that i thought i could only do alone, and the only way to make any progress was to find the answers by reflecting on my life. i’ve since learned that there is a wrong way to be introspective. often while i’m thinking i ask myself why. why did i let this happen to myself, why did i do that, why did i say that, and the why’s go on, but they need to stop. frankly, “why questions can draw us to our limitations” (the right way to be introspective (yes there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). to me, they are validation that something is wrong with me and i am not making this all up, but that’s all they’re telling me. i’m left with a problem without an answer and that’s the limitation. the problem that is all i think about, and in philosophy this year i learned the term “ergo sum cognito” – i think therefor i am. by only thinking about the problem, i am the problem. after i realized that, i knew this was not something i could figure out along. albert einstein said you can not solve a problem with the same mindset that created it, and so i looked to new outlets to help shift my perspective on my situation. one very useful tool is talking to others. just like out conversations in week 5, i have had many similar conversations with a friend named jay, my mom, and my brother to better understand my situation. they are helpful, but they weren’t always. my first couple conversation i had with people i found myself just spewing out the same thought patterns that i was thinking, which was dumb, because just as the why mindset was no https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ help to me, the why mindset was no help in my conversations with others. my first conversations made no progress. i spend my time talking trying as hard as i could to convince the other person that i am not the same person as i was before and giving them every reason as for why. the only thing this made clear for me was a strong distinction between the self i am now and the self i was. this clarity only led to more confusion. in a way, these two concepts of self were two different jurisdictions, and when i talked myself into this place i felt helplessly confused. “it is in this place where we judge the other and feel the impossibility of anything getting bridged. the gulf too wide and the gap too distant, the walls grow higher, and we forget who we are meant to be” (tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week 7). and it’s true. maybe my old self was judging my current self, but what i can attest for is the memory of a clear feeling of lostness and a worry that i will never feel like myself again. asking why to myself led me to asking why to others and asking why to others led me to realizing that i had to stop asking why. instead, i had to start focusing on what was happening to me. it’s probably true that all my thinking and contemplating was just a ploy to keep myself distracted from all the things that make me feel anxious. but i feel like these are not problems i should think myself out of. i believe they are problems i should tackle head on because “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). if i wanted to find answers, i had to start focusing on what makes me anxious, do them mindfully, and trust that in this process i will find the answer i have been looking for. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/523975?module_item_id=167990 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html for all my life i have been avoiding my problems and look where that has gotten me. there is nothing productive in overthinking an answer. i was trying too hard to understand a question that doesn’t have an answer. there is nothing i can think to myself or anything someone can say to me to make me understand this problem i am trying to solve. i like to relate this to a religion called taoism, and in toaism there is the toa. the toa is pretty much what i have been trying so hard to solve, but the catch is that in the religion they say that toa is not something you can put into words, and if you think you can then you do not have to tao. this is a piece of wisdom that i really like, and it has led to stop running from my problem and start facing them. i have been using college as a time to put myself in uncomfortable positions so i can grow and learn about myself. learning about myself is really the first step to a life well lived. “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices.” (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course moreau fye week 4). and that is really what i have been trying to do from the very beginning. i was always trying to learn about myself, but i just wasn’t doing it the right way. i am confident that i am on the right track, and i am sure that i will regain the sense of self i know i used to have. one this note, father hesburgh said “since the age of six, all i wanted to be a priest… i was never the kid playing firemen in the back yard. there wasn’t a moment when i chose it. the priest hood was my calling.” (hesburgh produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley– moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh had a sense of self that i envy greatly, and it’s the same kind that i am trying to achieve. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 i am sorry that this was not really a eulogy, but i just didn’t feel like that was something i was able to write without saying this first. community and its role in my nd experience my first semester at notre dame has gone by extremely fast filled with new friends, new ideas, new experiences, lots of laughs, and some disappointments as well. when i think about everything that i have encountered, it seems naive to think that i can reduce my experiences down to a 1000 word essay at the end of the semester. however, this paper is a welcome opportunity to reflect on my semester, and has helped me actually process my time here so far. one reason i picked notre dame was because i had heard about how amazing residential life was here. i had heard stories about the community developed in the halls, and the life-long relationships formed there. when i first arrived on campus it was one of the first things that i encountered, and i felt confident i was in the right place. the first week all of the upperclassmen in 4a (my section in o’neill) came and introduced themselves to us and gave us a little talk about how important the 4a family has been to them and said how excited they were to have us as a part of it. when reading the article, “advice from a formerly lonely college student,” i thought about my experience with 4a and how helpful that was for me. emery bergman said, “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me.” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergman moreau fye week nine) luckily, i had realized this before i got to college and set my expectations pretty low. i thought that it would take me at least a few months, maybe a semester before i actually have a few good friends that i could even consistently get dinner with.. however, my experience with 4a has blown away my expectations. i immediately had a group that i could talk with, do activities with, and eat dinner with. throughout the semester, i continued to grow closer with them and know i will continue to do so the rest of my time here. watching the seniors at different events talk about how much the section has meant to them gave me confidence that i was in the right place. talking with my friends at other colleges i realized how rare this was, and it made me feel incredibly lucky. community is something that i have always believed is incredibly important. my parents have always stressed the importance of community and it is something that i have come to prioritize in my life. this semester i have encountered new ideas and philosophies, and i remain convinced that community is essential to a meaningful life. in my god and the good life class, a few lectures have gone over what gives life meaning. aristotle believed that living out your function is what gives life meaning, whereas existentialists believe that everyone can choose their own meaning. personally, i believe that helping others in your community is what is really important. i think that you should aim to help people, but you should focus on the people in your community. i am a part of many communities both here at notre dame and back home my family, my friend group, 4a, and ultimate frisbee club are a few of the main ones. by ingraining yourself in the community, you give meaning to your life, because if you weren’t there the communities you are a part of would not do as well without you. honestly, i don’t totally agree with parker palmer in his article “thirteen ways of looking at community” (moreau fye week 11). while i agree with his idea that we can't share intimacy with everyone in our different communities, i don’t agree with his statement, “when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” for example, i think that you could turn something like teammates on a club sports team into a real community by inviting your teammates to hang out outside of practices. the community i feel a part of in ultimate frisbee club is not just because i practice and play with my teammates, but because we also do many activities outside of ultimate frisbee together. in this way i think that community can be “manufactured” in a way. but these new relationships and that community is not the only thing i have encountered during this semester. i also encountered many new ideas that have helped me think deeper about religion and the role it plays in our world today. fr. jenkins’ commencement speech talked about how important faith is in our society. he stressed the importance of treating each other with respect despite differing opinions. he stated, “if we can help solve the problem of hatred, we have a chance to come together and solve all the others.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” fr. john jenkins, moreau fye week 10). i think that fr. jenkins is very accurate with this statement; and i think that faith is an important tool in being able to do this. a huge message in the bible, and what i think is the most important one is the golden rule: treat your neighbor as yourself. if everyone lived by this rule, there would be much less hatred in this world. i think that hope is also something that contributes to our ability to stop hatred is humanity's capacity to remain hopeful through almost anything. i think that if we did not have this capacity we would resort to hatred much quicker than we already do. i think that the screwtape letters exhibit this principle in a very interesting way by writing from the perspective of a demon. (“the screwtape letters” by c.s lewis moreau fye week 12). screwtape continually stresses how difficult it is to lead someone away from god because of the way we hang onto hope. my semester has been full of many new experiences, new communities, and new ideas. i have encountered many things, and i believe these encounters have transformed me into a better and more mature person. my beliefs are more formulated and my communities are stronger. i have learned how to manage my time, as well as balance my social time with studying. as this semester comes to an end, i realize that i have probably encountered more new things in this period of time than at any other point in my life, and i enjoy reflecting on how much i have grown. moreau integration 1 edited jessica geriane moreau first year experience integration 1 courage of my convictions i believe that i am searching for many paths in life, including how far i want to take my swimming career, where i want to be after college, and what i want to do with my life in the end. however, these past few weeks, i have felt many emotions that i have never felt in an extreme way before, and through these experiences, i believe that i am searching for ways to love unconditionally. i have come to think this because i have struggled with putting trust in others and loving those around me with my full heart due to past situations and experiences, one of which was very recent and may still be ongoing. dr. brown from our qqc week 1 tedtalk stated to “love with our whole hearts, even if there is no guarantee” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this belief has constantly been challenged since my time at notre dame, as sometimes i still find it difficult to show someone who i truly am or open up to other people. however, i still have the desire to love as much as i can without being too overbearing, and i wish someone would do the same for me. i believe that, by forging life-giving relationships, i will be able to discover more not only about the other person, but more about myself. relationships are all about enjoying each other’s company, relying on each other, and so much more, and if there is no mutual respect between individuals, then the relationship is not fit to continue (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). nonetheless, it is through these things that one can grow in their own understanding of themselves. there will always be so many ups and downs throughout a relationship or friendship, and one should take these roller coasters as lessons learned, which possibly could be applied to another situation later in life. some relationships may not turn out the way that one may want them to which may lead to lots of regret, but this should not stop one from continuing to learn more about themselves. understanding that other people can raise you up and support you but also bring you down and break you is imperative to self-discovery and how the traits that you hold and embody make you, you. since i have arrived at notre dame, i have come to believe more strongly that faith is the foundation in which we will find our true paths in life and grow in our own beliefs. i have been in private, catholic schooling since i was 5 years old, and since then, i believe that i have grown too out of touch with my faith, as it became more repetitive to me, but from everything that i have seen at notre dame and understanding the university's emphasis on christianity, it all has helped me see more clearly that god is always at the center of our lives, and he wants us to put ourselves out into the world so that we can (and he can show us) who we are truly to become and to discover. in the “student reflections on faith”, victor talks about how special god means to him (“student reflections on faith” moreau fye week three). when reading this passage, i https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing realized i wanted to have the same perseverance and willingness to keep faith in god in the most difficult of times and allow my faith to take a bigger role in my life. i believe that in order to recognize the sin that we hold, we must look inwardly at ourselves. this quote from david brooks states: “...we are often not taught to recognize the sin in ourselves in that we are not taught in this culture how to wrestle with it, how to confront it, and how to combat it” (“should you live for your resume or for your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). i believe that this quote represents the undeniable truth that we cannot easily see the bad within ourselves and how to control and tame it. from my own standpoint, i believe that the society we live in disregards the proper way to handle sin and primarily focuses on the external side of humanity rather than the internal. to better ourselves, we should look inwards rather than outworldly, focusing on the humility and kindness that unites us all as humans. by doing so, those around us would be working to recognize their own transgressions as well as assist others in discovering theirs and helping them overcome their wrongdoings. from attending a very prestigious university to playing a sport at the division i level, i believe that failure should not be looked upon as a hindrance to success, but rather a lesson to be learned. in her laetare medalist address, carla harris’ states “failure always brings you a gift, and that gift is called experience” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). harris states that failure is not something that a person should be afraid of, rather it is something that should be expected and taken as a learning opportunity. however, sometimes i still struggle to get past defeats and frustrations because success always seems so close, but usually is so far. i have come to realize that success is not easily obtained, and failure occurs more than anything, which is why each setback is another chance to be greater. every obstacle we face is something that allows us to grow personally, or even in our faith. we should take these experiences with a positive mindset, and it is best that we believe that there will always be chances to progress towards what we are truly meant to do and to be. i believe that i grow from the people around me and the experiences that i have undergone. looking back at what has happened to me in the past and the decisions i have made has made me realize that i would not be in the same situation i am in right now without those who are close to me and who have supported me unconditionally. there have been times where i have struggled to find the motivation for school and for swimming and instances where i had to take each day an hour at a time. if it wasn’t for my peers and my family, i do not think i would have made the right decisions day by day to end up in what i perceive to be as the greatest outcome of my life so far. in creating the “where i’m from” poems for the week 6 qqc, i have come to understand that each bit of my life, from my burt’s bees chapstick to the shouts and screams of my coaches to the four hallways of my high school, has shaped who i have become, and i am so entirely grateful for each step of the way (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i believe that my community here, back at home, and myself should take more care in shaping the perceptions of others. i know quite a few people that can be highly judgemental and use that to turn their friends on other people. chimamanda adichie states in her tedtalk: https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=en https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html “power is the ability not just to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week 7). adichie emphasizes the notion that one person has the ability to shape the perceptions of another person to others from a single story or principle. as she mentions, it is important to note that a single story should not allow us to create biases about an individual. forming false perceptions about other people is a direct path towards misunderstanding and offensiveness. one cannot truly know a person strictly from a single narrative. i still tend to judge something or someone based on first impressions or something that i heard someone else say, but in order to really understand, i must use my ability to listen to the individual and realize the fact that all stories matter, and first perceptions do not entirely shape a person. https://www.ted.com/search?q=the+danger+of+a+single+story week 13 integration 2 1 semester in notre dame it is almost the end of the fall semester of my first year of notre dame. i said the exact same thing in the last integration assignment, but really, the same sentiment still applies here. i have made quite a few important decisions in the past month or so, such as dropping my chemistry laboratory class. actually, i have also decided to take a gap year. i think it is the best for my mental health and it would be beneficial for me to regain my love for learning, which has diminished significantly in the last few months. i feel like each generation of students, especially the class of 2024 and 2025, have had to deal with imposter syndrome. imposter syndrome is feeling not good enough to be in a certain situation. in an article titled “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, julia hogan talked about how when we don’t meet expectations that others set on us, we feel worse than when we set the expectations ourselves. the main takeaway from her article is to not care so much about what others think and live our own lives. if we live our life based on the expectations of other people, is that even our own lives? (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) as we are exposed to more and more events in our lives, we will see the good, the bad, and the ugly that life brings us. in particular, the bad ones can break us, physically or mentally. from the article find healing in kintsugi workshop (“women find healing in kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10) it is suggested to instead run away from the bad stuff that happened to us, we need to accept that it happened, and while we don’t have to find the good in these situations, we should understand how those experiences have changed our lives and maybe even learn from them. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ living in south bend is a huge cultural shift from living in new york, just like how moving from hong kong to new york was a huge change for me. one of the reasons for this shift is the diversity of these places. specifically, south bend is significantly less diverse than new york. diversity matters (“diversity matters” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11) because living in a diverse environment can further our understanding of other identities, while at the same time learn about the similarities that bond us and appreciate the differences between us. furthermore we can use this opportunity to dispel any stereotypes that we previously had for other identities. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109241 integration one assignment-shah nicolina shah integration one assignment october 15th, 2021 all this hard work will pay off root belief #1: i believe that i am made to struggle with my own identity. this particular belief stems from the notre dame nrotc community. prior to entering the unit, most midshipmen, as well as most civilians, view the unit as a group of tough, strong, professional, and emotionless midshipmen made to handle any and all tasks in both their naval and marine careers. these individuals are not thought to be particularly caring, weak, or vulnerable, since their ultimate end is to join the united states navy. their identity in the unit is thought to be a successful naval midshipman and eventually a strong naval officer. the term “weakness” is not supposed to be in their vocabulary. however, this could not be more true. on the very first day that the new midshipmen are brought into notre dame’s unit, they are welcomed by warm greetings and smiles. the upperclassmen are happy to see the new freshmen and are excited to get to know them over the next few years. on the same day, the commanding officer of the unit welcomes the new midshipmen with an opening speech, which is not meant to be emotionless. he comforts them that they will be welcomed and that the new midshipmen should feel like they are at home. within the first few moments of being in the unit, the midshipmen experience several warming emotions from both the staff and the students, unlike what anyone would expect. they learn that their identity is not meant to be what everyone makes it out to be. the midshipmen understand that they can be weak at times and that it is okay to make mistakes. the staff makes sure that the freshmen know that while they still have to be professional and tough at times, they are also allowed to be human and experience human emotions. they do not have to be as rigid as everyone outside of the unit perceives them to be. the midshipmen have “the courage to be imperfect” in the unit (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). the commanding officer also warns the midshipmen that they will question why they are here and what their ultimate purpose is within the unit, and he lets them know that this experience is normal and encouraged. without struggle, the midshipmen would never be able to understand their true and underlying reasons for being at notre dame. within a few hours, the earlier beliefs and views of the naval unit held by the midshipmen are shattered and replaced with new and more encouraging views and beliefs. the commanding officer’s lecture lined up with several things that brene brown outlined in her ted talk. both brene brown and captain thompson, the commanding officer, talked about being courageous and not giving in to your own personal shames and fears. in order to grow, according to brene brown, “we have to be able to open ourselves up and be seen as we truly are” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). captain thompson’s lecture lined up almost perfectly with this quote. he wants to see our true human selves, and in order for him to see that we have to open up to both him, his fellow officers, and the other students. both brene brown and captain thompson talked about allowing ourselves to be vulnerable so that we can be successful in our lives and careers. in general, they both touched on a very similar topic: vulnerability is a necessity in our lives. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be shah 2 after the first couple of days in the unit, the midshipmen also experience something else that is new. they learn that they are allowed to be vulnerable in their unit not only to their fellow midshipmen but also to their officers. the freshmen learn that they can explain and are encouraged to explain their concerns and problems to the unit. every officer in the unit wants the midshipmen to feel comfortable to come into their offices for a “therapy” session, casual chit-chat, or advice on any problem they may have. they want the midshipmen to understand that they are not alone. the more that the midshipmen talk to their officers, the more they can prepare themselves for their career in the navy. the midshipmen are not living for the moment, but rather they are living for their future careers in the military. in short, they are living for what they can leave behind in their name. these next few days in the unit align with a concept that david brooks discussed in his ted talk. david brooks wanted people to understand the importance of what your life leaves behind. living in the moment is also important, but what you leave behind after your life is more important. just like captain thompson did not want the midshipmen to get too caught up in the moment, neither did david brooks. captain thompson wanted the midshipmen to succeed in their careers in the navy, not just as midshipmen in the notre dame program. david brooks wanted people to succeed in their eulogy, not in their resumes per se. “people will most likely not remember what you do in the small moments of your lives but will remember what you leave behind well after your life is over” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreaudavid brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy? fye week two). root belief #2: i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by placing my trust in uncomfortable things. this second belief stems from the religious community at notre dame and in the nrotc community. at notre dame, faith and religion are very prominent, and one expects them to be since notre dame is a catholic university. however, one would never expect how much these two things actually affect the students in the unit. in the nrotc unit, several challenging and stressful situations arise. for example, there are uniform checks, presentations in front of the entire battalion, and face-to-face meetings with the commanding officer. religion and faith help provide some relaxation with these stressful things and can make these stressful situations more bearable. before some physical training sessions, the midshipmen pray so that they have a good workout. during the battalion’s drill period, guest speakers can be brought in to help the midshipmen with strengthening their faith. overall, the battalion is interested in helping the midshipmen become stronger in their faith. placing your trust in religion, however, is not an easy task. this “task” can be very uncomfortable to several midshipmen because it is placing your trust in a relationship one cannot see or physically interact with. this is a relationship that requires complete devotion, dedication, and belief in something that one cannot physically prove, which is an uncomfortable thing to do. even though this relationship is uncomfortable and difficult, it is still a life-giving relationship since it will always be there, especially when https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim shah 3 someone needs it most. this one-of-a-kind relationship will always strive to help, ease the mind, and provide aid in difficult situations. this difficult relationship within the unit aligns with a concept that is brought up in some of the students’ reflections on faith at notre dame. one student said that “it was in my lowest moments of loneliness and feelings of inadequacy that i leaned on god more than ever in order to get me through” (“student reflections on faith” by nyah, -moreau fye week 3). just like nyah leaned on god instudent reflections on faith_pdf some of her toughest moments, so do the naval midshipmen. when the midshipmen are trying to conquer their most difficult situations, they use their resources of faith and religion, even though it may be uncomfortable and tiring. another aspect of the nrotc unit is the several essential relationships that the midshipmen make with each other and the staff. all of the relationships are good relationships, but they can bring their hardships along with them. for example, in the first few weeks of training, the staff focus on lecturing the midshipmen on sapr. sapr stands for sexual assault prevention and response. the staff teaches the midshipmen how to know when to stand up for a friend being assaulted, when to know if someone is being assaulted, what to do in different situations, and who to talk to if someone is in danger. these conversations are very uncomfortable and can make the relationship with the staff member uncomfortable as well. no one likes to talk about this subject, but it is necessary to talk about it. this life-giving relationship with the staff can be agonizing at times, but all of the midshipmen know that is a necessary uncomfortable. they understand that they need to know what to do in these situations, so they place their trust in these uncomfortable relationships. this aspect of nrotc aligns with a topic brought up in a video by the one love foundation. the video explains the difference between real love and abusive love. one of the quotes is: “because i love you, you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation, -moreau#thatsnotlove campaign | because i love you whiskey | one love foundation fye week 4). this quote shows the power that an abusive relationship can have over someone. the abuser can try to justify their action with love, but that does not make it right. the video is trying to point out the signs of an abusive relationship so that people can figure it out for themselves or others before it is too late. sapr is trying to accomplish the very same thing. sapr wants the midshipmen to understand abuse and assault so that they can prevent it. therefore, the staff teaches the midshipmen about this uncomfortable topic so that they can learn more in the future. the midshipmen place their trust in an uncomfortable life-giving relationship with the staff so that they can be more successful in stopping and preventing assault. root belief #3: i believe that i grow by applying myself to new surroundings. this final belief stems from the integration of my new college life and old hometown life. one of the amazing things about our battalion is the variety of people that are in it. everyone comes from a different background and a different hometown. past the physical and geographical https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g shah 4 differences, everyone is also part of the unit for different and unique reasons. this variety allows the battalion to flourish. everyone can add their individuality to the battalion, while also keeping in track with the battalion’s core values. not only does everyone add their own values to the unit, but the midshipmen also apply other midshipmen’s perspectives into their lives within the battalion. the relationship of the battalion compares to the relationship of a bi-racial family. people teach others about their perspectives and habits of doing things, while also learning from others’ habits and perspectives. the midshipmen apply themselves in these new surroundings so that the battalion can grow as a whole. this type of growth in the battalion is very similar to a topic that carla harris talks about in her laetare medalist address. she says, “the way to grow your power is indeed to give it away” (“ notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris, -moreau fye week 5). thenotre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address only way to grow stronger as a person is to give your power away to others. this is exactly what the midshipmen in the battalion are doing. they are giving away their power of knowledge so that they can grow stronger, and so that their battalion can grow stronger. the midshipmen are sharing their personal experiences for growth and success in their new college lives. also, this variety and diversity within the battalion mirrors something that george ella lyon stands for. george ella lyon believes that diversity around the world should be praised. george says, “we want to gather the diversity of our voices, and we plan to archive the results online and to present them, in some form, in d.c” (“where i'm from”, a poem by george ella lyon, writer and teacher -moreau fye week 6). she wants to celebrate diversity, and proclaim diversity as an amazing and productive thing. the midshipmen in the battalion are doing the same thing. they want to celebrate their battalion’s diversity and learn from each others’ differences. no one in the battalion feels like they have to hide who they are, and that is a truly wonderful thing. george ella lyon also believes in the very same concept that no one should have to hide who they are. one final aspect of the nrotc battalion is the flexibility of the midshipmen and staff. all of the incoming midshipmen had to attend nsi, new student indoctrination, before joining notre dame’s unit. nsi was very similar to basic training or boot camp. the midshipmen started out as candidates and trained for four weeks at a base in great lakes, il in order to earn their title as midshipmen. while at nsi, the midshipmen learned how to fulfill military custom requirements and skills in a very specific way. they learned how to march in a very structured discipline, the responses to say to each other and their “higher-ups”, and how to act in a professional manner. however, once the midshipmen arrived on notre dame’s campus, notre dame’s unit wanted them to fulfill those same military custom requirements in a different way. it was almost like the midshipmen were in a entrely new surrounding, and had to learn those customs all over again. however, the midshipmen never judged the new customs, and the staff never judged the midshipmen on their old customs that they learned at nsi. the midshipmen and staff simply had to adapt to their new surroundings. in that adaptation, the midshipmen grew as not just midshipmen, but notre dame midshipmen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html shah 5 this growth from the incoming midshipem compares to a concept brought up in a text by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris. the concept that they talked about was implicit bias. they said that “this tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” (“how to think about 'implicit bias'” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris-moreau fye week 7). implicit bias is a term used to describe the attitudes that we can have towards people or stereotypes we can hold to people without our conscious knowledge. thankfully for the midshipmen, the staff did not hold any implicit bias towards them. the staff could have biased them as nsi drones or nsi robots that cannot think without their rigid structure, but they did not. instead, the staff tried to help the midshpmen out of that rigid structure without judging them for it. the staff knew that it was all the midshipmen knew at that point, and did not critique them for it or hold any stereotypes against them for it. the staff and midshipmen grew in this new surrounding and worked together towards a common goal of a less-rigid midshipman. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ shah 6 pictures: picture one: photo of bravo squad after the first field meet. midshipmen used their combined strengths to complete the required fitness activities successfully. picture two: photo of midn 4/c shah competing in her required event. she was required to run in a burpee/suicide relay, since she did track in high school. integration 1 hannon prof. nguyen moreau fye 15 october 2021 building up my core (beliefs) i believe that 2+2=4. i believe that i am currently in south bend, in. i believe that the wait time for stir fry at the dining hall will always be longer than it says. but when it comes to more fundamental beliefs, i tend to shy away from strong beliefs. root beliefs seem scary because they imply action: i can’t just say that i have a belief; i actually need to live it out. with that being said, i have deepened four core beliefs regarding service, friendship, faith, and stories in these past two months. i believe that my purpose is to help other people. i’ve enjoyed volunteering since i was little, and for four years i participated in my high school’s weeklong summer service camp. fortunately, my top five virtues—judgement, perspective, prudence, teamwork, and creativity (via character strengths survey moreau fye week 2)—seem like a good recipe for making a difference in others’ lives. one of my hopes for college is to find more ways to help people in more unique ways. for this reason, i joined enable, a club which designs and 3d prints prosthetic hands and arms for users around the country. i’ve been fascinated for years with a wide variety of medical differences, including limb differences, but i would always inadvertently fall into pitying such individuals and making assumptions that they were completely reliant on prostheses: “so that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). through enable, i’ve been reminded that https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109283 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript?language=en limb-different individuals do not deserve pity; prostheses are useful tools for them but not anything monumentally life-changing. this has made me modify my belief somewhat: my purpose may be to help people, but being helpful doesn’t mean i have to do everything. furthermore, i believe that i can forge life-giving relationships by being myself. during the first few weeks of the semester, i was thrust into this community where i knew almost no one and i was desperate to make friends after struggling throughout high school to find a stable friend group. i knew that i should just be myself, but even so, i put on this facade of being overly outgoing, cheerful, and agreeable. thus, my belief was challenged even by my own actions: without consciously realizing it, i would modify my personality with each person i met to try to imitate them in the hope that they would be friends with me. i wasn’t the whole me, which made those first weeks stressful and reminiscent of brown’s wisdom: “shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection: is there something about me that, if other people know it or see it, that i won’t be worthy of connection?” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). even so, i often worry too much that i am a toxic friend. i worry that i talk about myself too much, that i initiate too much, that “[i] can only hang out when it’s convenient for [me]” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week 4). i hope that if i am truly and authentically myself, those toxic pitfalls will avoid themselves, and i have finally found two friends with whom i can make sarcastic jokes, spend hours hanging out on the weekends, and talk about stupid things, all without fear of judgement. moreover, i believe that i am searching for faith. after reflection on where i’m from, i’ve realized that my 15 years of catholic education and going to mass regularly since i was a newborn have put me into somewhat of a catholic bubble (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). faith came easy as a child, especially since i was so surrounded https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html by religion, and, for better or for worse, i was a little sheltered from the outside world. as i’ve gotten older, faith has felt increasingly foreign, inconsistent, and impersonal to me. here at notre dame, i’ve met both some of the most devout catholics and some of the most staunch atheists, and i’ve struggled to find where my faith fits in the continuum. i oscillate between seeing the beautiful virtues of faith and the ways in which religion can be harmful. i am part of a compass group with students who seem more serious and confident about their faith than i am, and that makes me feel even more conflicted. i desire faith, but i don’t want it to be forced, and i think this advice will help me going forward: “be patient. if you’re in a hurry, faith becomes so much harder to understand” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). i want to have faith not because i was raised this way, but because i have genuine convictions. finally, i believe that i pursue truth by listening to individuals’ stories. i have interacted with people who differ from myself in terms of major, political leaning, race, socioeconomic background, sexual orientation, and much more. while notre dame is by no means the most diverse college campus, i have still learned so much. for the first few weeks of class, i would eat my meals with different people each time, and i loved hearing all about their backgrounds, likes, dislikes, and why they ended up here at notre dame. i’ve heard from a guy who turned down ivy league offers for a full ride here in spite of his hesitancy regarding notre dame’s catholic identity. i’ve heard from a girl in the gateway program who had already put an enrollment deposit at another college before deciding during a senior retreat to take the offer here instead. i’ve read about fr. sorin, who came here in the dead of winter with nothing but a promise: “notre dame du lac has been given to us by the bishop only on condition that we build here a college” (“letter to father general moreau” by fr. sorin moreau fye week 5). i believe that https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view each of these unique stories collectively represents truth. each story is like an unrepeatable puzzle piece that has its own spot in the full image of the truth of life. the more stories i hear, the more of this truth i will discover. i hope that i will become more confident and mature in my root beliefs over the next four years. if all goes according to plan, i hope to be helpful yet unbiased with my patients in some career in the medical field. i hope to deepen my relationships and form new ones, all while being myself. i hope to continue on my faith journey and find some more answers. i hope to hear stories from as many people around the world as possible to construct the puzzle of truth. but no matter what, there is one current belief that i hope will be disproven: i hope that the stir fry line times will one day be accurate. moreau fye 29 april 2022 capstone integration as a cathoplic i believe in inclusivity. i believe everyone has a right to be themselves and that we should love everyone for who they are and not who we want them to be. in this, it is also important to recognize the importance of being yourself. when we stay true to ourselves we allow people to be in the presence of authenticity. this creates a more trusting space for everyone involved. i went to catholic school all my life except for three years. during these years i attended the public school in my area. since it was such a big class i felt like i could not stand out and be myself. i did everything in my power to be like everyone else. i stayed very quiet in class, i stopped playing sports because that was what the girls did, wore what everyone else was wearing, and lost touch with god. when i started to depend on validation from others i was not true to myself and this is honestly because i did not know who i was. during this time in public school i thought i had to be very “girl like” and fit into the same mold as everyone. this is why i recognize the importance of allowing others to be themselves because i know it hurt when i was not accepted. family is the most important thing to me. i do not know what i would do or where i would be without my family. staying close to the people who are essentially forced to be in your life is key. i want to make my family proud and try to live a life as great as the ones my parents have lived. your family will always be there for you no matter what. my family has always been there for me. when moving schools, practicing my faith, and going through my mental illnesses, they supported me. they were never too quick to judge and they allowed me to be myself. this allowed me the courage and strength to ask for help when i was struggling. without them i would not have been able to be the person i am today. they have pushed me to my fullest potential and never gave up on me. for example, i would not have found my love for architecture if my mom did not push me to attend a two week architecture camp two summers ago. i also would not have found my passion for golf if my dad did not force me to play with him and told me that he thought i was great. and lastly without my sister i would not have been able to get through the tough realities of being a teenager. my older sister shared with me things she had experienced and showed me that i was not alone. she ultimately validated my feelings and encouraged me to seek the help i needed. i see love in action when i see my family. not only do they have this unconditional love for me and no matter how annoying i can be, they will love me, but they actually show their love through the actions i have stated. i know as my life goes on i will lean on my family for hel;p and they will support me no matter what. i want to live close to my family so i can be surrounded by people who truly love me. god is at the center of my mind. i strive to find things in his name and make him proud. i do not fear death because i know he will be waiting for me. i know when times are hard god is there for me. it is like always having someone on your side. he will cheer you on and forgive you because he only wants the best for us. prayer is very important in grounding yourself and i use it as a tool to keep me going. every experience of love is an experience of god. the one who loves is never alone. i can now see god’s love in my family, my friends, and the beautiful things in nature. i understand that our faith is an ongoing journey and love in action will always prevail. i hope to continue to go to church every sunday and live life as he would. as i attend a catholic university this will not be hard. but, later in life i will be tested and i must learn to make time for my faith. being successful truly means just being happy. success cannot and should not be measured by how much money you make or how smart you are. to me being successful is feeling fulfilled. i will feel successful once i continue to work and achieve my dreams. this includes finding someone who loves me, making a family, and being an architect. i know whatever path this is, if i feel happy i know that i have succeeded. the highest good in life is happiness. happiness is the source of life’s energy. without happiness, there would be no motivation to do anything. happiness is all anyone wants and it is all i hope for. i will continue to create an environment where everyone has the opportunity to be happy. i want to make others happy but, ultimately, i want to be happy. i know if i stick to my core values that i will create a life for myself where i feel fulfilled and happy. someone who lives a life well-lived is someone who has strength and dignity. in life you must realize that you are doing things for yourself and you do not have to please others. i am my only obstacle. to combat suffering, i will be with my family. it feels good to be alone at the moment. however, surrounding myself with a support system can build the strength i need to keep going up. by sticking to my core beliefs, i want to continue to be happy and explore what i bring to the world. life is a working process and it is that that makes us strong. it is okay to not know where i will be in 10 years, but it is important to continue to do what i love. riley's moreau integration 2 riley 1 philip riley moreau integration two 12/2/2021 my complex view of notre dame prompt: what have i encountered, and how will i respond? when i first encountered this prompt question, i was confused about where to start, so i decided to take my professors advice and tackle this question instead “what have you experienced or realized since coming to notre dame?” when i first committed to notre dame my senior year of high school, i had high expectations for my freshman year of college. i arrived on campus the first day nervous about classes, excited about football, and worried that my expectations for a great freshman year would be let down. the year started off slow and challenging due to covid, but i was still seventeen at the time, trying to be as positive as i could because i knew that the summer would be different and fun, which i was right. the summer was fun and very positive; we had a lot more free time, and i felt like i was connecting with the coaching staff and players on the team. but then training camp and the regular season started, which was a challenging time for me. all the relationships that i had fostered with the coaching staff seemed to dwindle away, and i was left feeling alone, which was hard because of the demands of classes and football and trying to keep up a healthy social life. but i would have to say that this past week has been my hardest time here at notre dame so far; the head coach of the football team brian kelly surprisingly left the program to take a job at lsu. i went into complete panic mode, not knowing the future in-store for me at the time, frantically trying to figure out who the next riley 2 head coach would be. but finally, after a week that seemed to be complete chaos was followed by a positive. the beloved defensive coordinator marcus freeman was chosen by notre dame to be the next head coach, making everything better. week nine qqc deals with responding to external and internal dissonance. since i am a division one athlete, i am constantly dealing with external dissonance; i continuously have outside forces like coaches, teammates, and professors that are drilling their own philosophy at me, which is changing the way i think about school, football, and life itself which is sometimes bad and good. when i first arrived at this university, i was struggling academically and socially, which made me bitter for choosing to come here in the first place. still, since then, i have been working on internal dissonance, which has been helping me change the way i think and my mindset. i have been more positive, trying to take everything day by day, and have been way more sociable. this quote from (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) “these are the things we tell ourselves when we let our lives be dictated by expectations. these expectations can come from others or from ourselves” really put things into perspective for me. i used to make wild expectations for certain things like significant events or fun activities that i did with friends and family, which nine out of ten times would leave me feeling let down or disappointed. still, now i have learned that i can’t focus on how others live their lives and just focus on enjoying mine. since being here at notre dame, i realized that i couldn’t allow myself to be brought down to rock bottom only because i am going through a hard time at the moment and just remember that better times are following behind the bad ones. riley 3 week ten qqc focus question was "what are the central challenges of my community, and how do i respond?". since being here at notre dame, i have realized that the community is facing a problem that we see too often in today’s society: specific groups of people being outed or left out because of their own personal decisions, which is very unfortunate. the university of notre dame is known for being a school that is not well diverse. sixty-seven percent of the students who attend notre dame are identified as white; this speaks volumes to the fact that notre dame is not a community where everyone is accepted as who they are. the notre dame community can tackle this problem is by celebrating diversity. this can be accomplished by attending different cultural groups events and meetings. “the ongoing conflicts over critical race theory have followed a predictable pattern of polarization. for catholic and jesuit schools, this division is inimical to our mission and damaging to the body of christ”.(“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devronmoreau fye week ten). week eleven qqc focus question is "how do i strengthen bonds of interconnection with others, especially in the midst of conflict or dissimilarity?" i almost have been here at notre dame for a year now. since most challenging being here for that long of a time, i have seen myself in the middle of countless arguments/disagreements and what i have learned from those arguments and disagreements is that the only way you can strengthen a bond with someone in the middle of conflict is that you have to be willing to learn from the other person and understand their way of thinking. if you genuinely listen to the other person, then finding a solution to the problem becomes significantly easier. “whether we know it or not, like it or not, honor it or not, we are embedded in the community. whether we think of ourselves as biological creatures or spiritual beings or both, the truth remains: we were created in and for a complex ecology of relatedness, riley 4 and without it, we wither and die.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmermoreau fye week eleven). week twelve focus question is "how do i live and grow in hope?". recently toward the end of the semester, as the season comes to a close, i can feel the depression creeping back up on me again, so i have decided to look for hope towards god’s plan for my life. i know that everything that is happening to me now (adversity) is for a reason and that the good that follows is much more bountiful. “hope is trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom” i follow this quote closely because i genuinely believe in it. (“holy cross and christian education,” by a publication of campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). gil the pursuit of beauty i believe that vulnerability is essential for genuine personal connection with other people. from week one of the moreau first year experience, i learned that one can truly be close to other people by being vulnerable. by being open to yourself, one can truly be open to others. in order for one to perceive their environments, one must have control over one’s own emotions and thoughts. i came to discover this because i have a difficult time understanding myself. brene brown says that “when we work from a place i believe that says, ‘i’m enough,’ then we stop screaming and start listening. we’re kinder and gentler to the people around us and we’re kinder and gentler to ourselves”(brown). after listening to brown and reflecting on myself, i came to learn that i only ever became comfortable opening up and interacting with my surroundings and the people around me after i was comfortable, confident, and vulnerable in myself. i believe that i can grow by learning to love myself for who i am. before coming to notre dame, i had a hard time learning to love myself for who i am. i still often struggle with this issue. i often find myself overly conscious of how other people perceive me. especially being in a completely new environment with complete strangers, i had a lot of pressure in maintaining the image that i want to show to the people around me. “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love. no virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as it is from our standpoint. therefore we must be saved by the final form of love which is forgiveness”(brooks). just as brooks explains, one can only truly after forgiveness. once i learned to forgive myself for the flaws that i was self-conscious about, i learned to love myself. i believe that faith can positively guide our daily lives. i consider myself to be a fairly active catholic. however, the pandemic significantly hindered my ability to practice my faith in a church. now that i have come to a religious institution that beautifully integrates the values of catholicism and education, i have learned that faith can guide my educational life. tim purnell, a fellow dawg, says that “at times, that has meant that my faith felt incredibly vibrant and exciting, and god was ‘feeling’ very close to me. much more often, though, it’s been that slow build -things didn’t go how i wanted, but i was able to see how god was still good to me through the ordeal” (tim purcell, student voices). when i go through tough times, i often find myself doubting god. however, tim showed me that i can embrace god even in the hardest times to guide my daily life. i believe that personal perceptions impact the relationships that i form with others. i believe myself to be a person that doesn’t complain often. i’ve had a very tight-knit group of friends since middle school. i never had a lot of experience venturing out of my comfort zone in making new friendships. because of this, i have little experience in making completely new friendships. when i first came to notre dame, i had to learn to develop true friendships with other people that i barely knew previously. “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term…the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” i learned that i had to find a community in which i not only found the most joy but also provided joy to others. i believe that the environments in which i live constantly change and shape who i am. coming to notre dame, i joined a loving religious community. since my time here, i was amazed by how open notre dame’s community was. before coming here, i knew that notre dame was less diverse than most college campuses, especially when compared to los angeles. however, after joining and participating in various cultural clubs and events, i found a footing with a community that i felt that i truly belonged in. “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love. did you notice that last part? faith and reason together place us always in relationship to each other.” with the openness i discovered at notre dame, i also became a very open minded person. i believe that empathy is the truest method to determining truth. along with the increased access to technology in recent times, the access to information is also becoming much easier. however, as much as people can learn helpful information, harmful or false information can also get around due to the collaborative nature of the internet. therefore in this present age, the ability to determine truth is becoming ever more important. the best way i learned from moreau to find this truth is to empathize with the people around us. i learned to look beyond my personal implicit biases to challenge my beliefs by putting myself in the shoes of other people. payne says that “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice. it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure…. many of us are more biased than we realize.”(payne). i learned that in a time of injustice, i have to do my best to understand the other perspective no matter how much my implicit biases may influence me. i believe that my purpose in life is to create and promote beauty that will positively impact the future. before i first decided i wanted to do architecture, i desired with the general goal to make a positive, lasting change in this world. however, i was unsure in what direction i would travel to achieve this ambition. inspired by my love of art, i decided that i would make a change through beauty. i wanted to use my artistic talents and my environmentalist ideals to edit the current path of humanity on earth. now that i have come to notre dame, i can feel myself getting closer to this goal. entering a community of people with similar interests, i was excited to see how i would grow as a person to reach this ultimate goal of creating lasting beauty. works cited payne, keith. “how to think about 'implicit bias'.” scientific american, scientific american, 27 mar. 2018, https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/. “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?, 2014, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted. taylor, olivia t. “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship.” grotto network, 17 sept. 2021, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/. “tedtalks: brene brown--the power of vulnerability.” ted, 2010. two notre dames: your holy cross education, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187. integration one living the good life “what makes a good life?” this is the foundational question of my philosophy class, god and the good life. throughout the semester, we are taught different philosophical theories or virtues that explain different views of a life well-lived. from kantian deontology to hedonism, we are asked to weigh these topics against our own understanding of the good life. by doing this, we sharpen our own beliefs while incorporating those of different philosophers. although broad philosophical topics may be able to explain the themes of a good life, i believe that a life well-lived is personal and entwined with one’s beliefs. i believe that strong relationships are necessary for someone to have a good life. when my town first went into quarantine during march of 2020, interactions between other people were forbidden as everyone was relegated to their house. because of this, some people began to develop a sense of loneliness, especially those who live alone; however, spending time with my family physically and virtually with my friends helped to alleviate the issues of being confined and made it enjoyable in a different way. instead of hanging out at school, i played video games on xbox with my friends while communicating over the phone. during a normal year, i would only see my family a few times a day due to school and other activities; now, i spend much of my day with them as we have meals together along with events like movie night. by continuing to engage in these relationships, i found happiness in an otherwise trying time. during the last year, i’ve realized the importance of ‘true’ relationships, specifically with friends. due to the closeness of my family, i know that we will be together no matter what; however, it is difficult to find a friendship that this holds true for. this idea of a ‘true’ friend is epitomized by the quote “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/). this type of friend is someone who brings out the best person that you can be and enables you to reach your full potential. i’ve been lucky enough to develop a relationship during high school with someone who i’d consider to be a ‘true’ friend. this friendship has been very helpful in dealing with difficult times, and i don’t know where i’d be without it. although i put a lot of value in my relationships that are ‘true,’ i enjoy spending time with people who i’m not as close with, which is, in fact, a vast majority of my friendships. these relationships can be just as important to one’s happiness as a ‘true’ friendship albeit with less familiarity. i express my appreciation for all of my friends when i write “i am from my friends, enjoying good times together, while simultaneously working through difficult ones” (“where i’m from poem” by moreau fye week six, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1otqjf3hiq72_6ovfcqqtpx3r-y0kh7ro5dxofxoy-1s/edit? usp=sharing). however, for many, it is difficult to form any kind of relationship. during a tedtalk, dr. brown said that “there was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it: that was the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe that they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0). based on this, one must believe that they are worthy of love in order to attain a happy, healthy relationship. in other words, a person must love themself before they are able to love others fully. i believe that learning about oneself and others is a life-long journey. during one of the required videos for the third week of moreau, father pete said “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery . . . what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois). the idea that self-discovery is a major focus of our lives is something that i realized recently. during my last years in high school, i began to actively search for and try to become the best version of myself. through this process, i’ve made progress on becoming who i want to be while learning more about who i am already. as i experience college, the learning of different topics is evident in our classwork while learning about myself is hidden within multiple experiences. this focus on self-discovery during college is even shown in notre dame’s mission of helping its students grow in both heart and mind. this journey extends beyond college and the rest of one’s life as they enter the workforce and continue the relationships that they built. in fact, one of the best ways to grow as a person is by surrounding yourself with ‘true’ relationships and learning from these people who truly care about you. in walking the path of self-discovery, a person can become the most genuine version of themselves. it is also important to learn about other peoples and cultures alongside self-reflection. during her tedtalk, chimamanda said “it had not occurred to me that anybody in his family could actually make something. all i had heard about them was how poor they were that it became impossible for me to see them as anything else but poor” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven, https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story). because of her limited perspective, she was unable to fully understand him and his family; instead, they were a caricature of poverty within her mind. her narrow perspective allowed this single trait to become their defining characteristic. in order to fully understand people, a person must be open to perspectives other than their own so that incorrect biases and generalizations don’t form. therefore, it is important to learn about others along with yourself to have a better understanding of the world around you. i believe in the importance of helping others. during the second week of moreau, brooks says “we happen to live in a society that favors adam 1 and often neglects adam 2” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim). unfortunately, there is much truth behind this quote as people spend significantly more time focusing on their success than they do on helping others. however, in my life, the importance of volunteership has always been prevalent. having been raised christian, i learned about service and its role in our lives. i heard the biblical miracles of jesus curing the sick and feeding the hungry. although i can not perform miracles of any magnitude, i’ve realized that volunteering to help others can be just as miraculous as turning water to wine. during my time in high school, i volunteered at a local community center, called beacon place, which served an under-resourced area. it was a place where the community could gather for events like halloween and easter. however, its more important purpose was the education of the students. from 1st grade to 8th grade, beacon place worked with them, teaching them subjects from reading to robotics. when they reached high school, beacon place didn’t leave them; instead, it changed its role and helped the students with their college applications. by guiding a child from 1st grade to college, which would have been nothing more than a dream for many families, beacon place performs miracles. this reminds me of a quote from mrs. harris’s speech at a notre dame graduation ceremony. she said “the way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know to help others for that will take your life from success to significance” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week five, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4). just as beacon place’s significance comes from volunteer teaching, i hope that i will be able to apply my skills and abilities towards the service of others in order to live a life of significance. strong relationships, self-discovery, understanding other people and perspectives, and helping others are all beliefs of mine that i believe will allow me to live a good life. although i’ve offered a strong reasoning for these beliefs, this doesn’t make them the definitive way to live. each person’s life and choices are a reflection of themself and their own will. the idea of a good life is impossible to define; instead, each individual must have their own understanding of a life well-lived. it, like all the great philosophical questions, is a matter of subjectivity. moreau final integration integration 2 the intersection of past experiences and future goals in the future, i want to be a leader that is able to help break the stigma surrounding mental health whether that be through research, writing, or clinical experience. as of now, a specific goal of mine would be to own an individual practice as a psychiatrist. i would also be really interested in researching the use of natural medicines to treat mental disorders another stigmatized field in medicine. to accomplish this, i plan to major in neuroscience, and try to gather research throughout my college experience. notre dame has an especially large range of research options in psychology, and i am excited to explore those when i am eligible sophomore year. in week 10, we considered how stereotypes are perpetuating our society, yet there are so many more biases that we haven't even talked about in class. specifically, there is a huge stigma regarding personality disorders that is ignored in our society today and this is a prevalent issue in my life today that has inspired me to pursue this as a future occupation, but also as a passion. even though this path is considered rigorous and demanding, i believe that i am fit for it as i view school and education as a gift, and something that is exciting. i genuinely enjoy learning, and i want to be a psychiatrist to be able to help people in need not for the title, or for financial reasons. i hope that this approach will guide me in my career and help to keep me centered and focused. i believe that i am capable of accomplishing my goals because i have gained a sense of self confidence in the past few years, which has allowed me to be able to relate and connect with people at a deeper level. in early high school, i used to not know who i was, or what i stood for: i just wanted to fit in. in week 11, i was given the chance to reflect about how i have grown to develop a broader sense of community throughout this first semester. in the reading, there was a quote that said, “ community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart”, and i have found this to be true. throughout the process of becoming more confident in myself whether it be my appearance, my interests, or my weight, i have been able to develop deeper and more spiritual connections with other people. this has helped me to be able to understand myself and others to a deeper level, and allow me to have the capacity to help my peers. i have made more friends in the first three months of college than i have in the four years of highschool, and i think that is due to my self confidence flourishing in a new environment. becoming an impactful psychiatrist and working in the mental health industry requires an ability to create relationships with the clients you are working with. to be able to do so, i need to remember that “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences.” (week 4). this discussion, about how to connect with people in a meaningful and equal manner, is a concrete method that i can work on to help better connect with people. if i am able to offer small parts of my own journey that others can connect with, it may allow them to feel welcome to open up to me. another personal strength, which i think i will be able to use to help change the stigma regarding mental health, is my ability to show vulnerability by example. i think that being vulnerable with myself, my journey with ocd, and explaining how normal it is, helps others to feel open to expressing their own issues. i am not embarrassed by my ocd, and the more i am open about, the more my friends and peers want to know. it's not a weakness, it is just something i live and work with. in week 1, this belief was further cemented by watching brene brown’s video, which had actually been previously recommended to my mother, who is a clinical psychologist for adolescents. her ted talk moved me, because it discusses how wholeheartedness and the power of vulnerability. through being vulnerable, we are able to give and receive a deeper sense of love which is needed in intense relationships. lastly, another strength that i have to accomplish my dreams is the relationship i have with my catholic faith one that throughout this semester notre dame has helped me to develop. although i am not sure where i stand in regards to organized religion, i am so grateful to be under the presence of some many accomplished priests and clergy. in week 12, we got to see father hesburgh’s library, and i was so impressed by how grounded and humble he was. he is a shining example of how i want my faith to guide my life. he used his connection to god and his spirituality to stand up to injustices and make deep social connections with people. as marty said, he made “everyone feel at ease,” and i hope i can use my faith to do the same. additionally, during my career, there will be times where i will need to lean on my faith in order to gain a sense of clarity. continuing to develop a stronger relationship with god will allow me to remain centered and focused. in week 5, this idea was further cemented when we discussed how notre dame offers a holy cross education that is an integrated way of using faith to serve in our education and careers. the final aspect of my personality, one that i have come to develop over the past year, is my “hope, not just optimism” (week 11 father kevin). i believe that this unwavering hope can inspire those who feel as if they don’t have a future. by remaining positive that there is joy in the future for everyone, i can inspire the clients i work with to get better for themselves and for their families. integration one mikolay 1 october 11, 2021 moreau integration 1 i believe that i can pursue real truth by always being open to other beliefs and intently listening to the ideas and opinions of others. in this world of heightened political concern, “we make everything that’s uncertain certain.” in the recent political sphere, america as a whole has become so polarized and stubborn in their one predestined view. people don’t like to be vulnerable and allow their ideas to be challenged. in reality, in almost every problem, the real truth lies somewhere between the polarized ends of the issue. i hope to become vulnerable and understand the perspectives of others to possibly alter my own view. being vulnerable is not just taking an outward step, but it is also looking inward. vulnerability can act as an opening to joy, happiness, and love. self confidence doesn’t come from ignoring others’ ideas and collapsing to your own comfort, it comes from allowing yourself to be vulnerable and understand the entire picture. i believe that i cannot reach true happiness without being aware of the beauty of my surroundings. personally, my favorite things on earth to do in my free time are snowboarding and going to the beach. which might make it seem unsurprising that on a survey my strongest trait came out as “appreciation of beauty and excellence.” at first i was surprised, the survey really made me second guess how much i truly knew my own self, but after some reflection it made sense. i find the most happiness when i feel comfortable and appreciative of the area that i’m in, feeling a strong sense of belonging. i hope to not only recognize beauty in nature throughout my life, but also beauty in others and in their actions. i wish to always show my appreciation for others and show them that i acknowledge their efforts. that little action will go a long way to make a positive impact for my own happiness and the happiness of others. i believe that spirituality gives my life a deeper, more significant meaning. no one said it better than father mccormick: “spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe.” to be spiritual requires selflessness in order to view the world as not yours, but gods. it also continually takes an effort for me to understand that the best decision might not always maximize my pleasure, but rather work towards the good of god’s creation and his people. at notre dame, i am surrounded by high achieving students in what is sometimes seen as a fight for successful roles in future life, so it may be hard to take a look at the outside world and have faith and great spirituality. faith has been pushed on me hard for my whole life, but here at notre dame, faith is encouraged, but not forced. i am excited to have the opportunity to pursue my own faith in god coming from me, not being forced upon me. i believe that i can build life giving relationships simply from giving effort and having common understanding. i’ve been surprised at how far just giving an effort goes in building friendships. my very first true friendships that i can recall thoroughly were my neighbors back home. as a kindergartener, i remember my mom telling me to go outside and make friends, seeing them together on the sidewalk, approaching them, and simply asking “can we be mikolay 2 october 11, 2021 moreau integration 1 friends?” after that, the rest is history, and we are still good friends to this day. a simple wave and short discussion can commonly blossom into a loving friendship. once the friendship gets closer, all it takes is understanding and conversations to “mutually grow on a path toward becoming better people.” all it takes is listening to the ideas of a friend and having fun experiences with them to grow as an individual and as a pair. i believe that failure will be a crucial step towards my success. father kevin grove once said: “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing.” failure has such a negative connotation. in reality, failure is inevitable in everyone’s life. the important thing for me to do is not just recognize occurrences of failure, it is to recognize how i can react and act differently as a result of my failure. the emphasis and accepting failure and using god in my everyday life is a lesson taught at notre dame that cannot be found nowhere else in the world. the message is clearly represented here: don’t lose the importance of morality and personality in an effort to reach success. i believe that i am made from my home environment and will never forget where i’m from. as i wrote my “where i’m from poem,” i learned that on the surface level, i may not seem all that special or different from any other suburban midwestern guy, but only i can recall my experiences and remember my feelings in that small neighborhood and my little catholic school. i hope to always keep these places close to my heart and continue to take the lessons i learned there on in my life as i develop and change from being a little boy running around the yard into a man providing for a family. i believe that i can grow by seeing through the status quo and working towards removing any implicit biases i have. at this time period in my life, i am finally leaving my suburban, mostly white midwestern neighborhood and immersing myself in another area with a variety of cultures, races, and backgrounds. i hope to remove my implicit bias and take this chance in my life to understand the perspectives of other races and understand how they are affected by prejudice and bias in ways that i am not. i want to be able to see these cultures without a stereotypical view portrayed by the media that is not always true. mikolay 3 october 11, 2021 moreau integration 1 works cited (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) (“character strength survey” by via institute on charactermoreau fye week 2) (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3) (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4) (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5) (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6) (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story kevin o'regan integration 1.pdf believing in god when it comes to answering the question of “what do you believe” there is no one topic that i can speak of which will cover everything which i believe in. everyone has a set of core values that often stem from family and experiences they have had. i believe that in my life i am searching for a way to reach happiness on this earth. i don’t entirely know what that happiness is going to look like. whether it's a career in pro golf, a business job, or raising a family with whomever i marry. the last one may be the most important to me, but i am not limiting myself to just that. i believe that forming a deep relationship with a spouse comes when someone feels as if they are seen. brene brown would agree, as she said “in order for connection to happen, we have to be seen. really seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe that i was put on this earth to be seen at a deep level by many people, not only my future spouse, but my friends and immediate family. i believe that in my life it is my job to serve the lord above by acting as a good catholic in all ways. god put me on this earth for me to prove to him that i love him enough to want to spend the rest of eternity with him in my next life. my purpose in this life is to serve him first, then do what i would like to do with my time here on this earth, no matter how long or short my time ends up being. as stated in the ted talk given by david brooks, “nothing worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). this quote relates in great ways to my faith. believing in god allows me to not obsess over every result, detach from the result of little events, and lastly it helps me be at peace with the fact that nothing worth doing can be achieved within my time here on earth. due to this, i do not have to worry about doing great things in this life, because i know nothing worth doing can be achieved. it is all about the next one. i believe that my community should do everything that they can to help each other. it does not mean that everyone has to donate to the poor, but rather it means that we need to look out for our brothers and sisters who may be struggling. father pete says “at the core of one's self is the very presence of god” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). knowing that at the core of one's self is the presence of god, it should be incredibly easy to want to help everyone in our community. another important aspect of being able to help someone is being selfless. an aspect of being selfless is being able to love our neighbor. father kevin grove says, “we cannot love the god who we do not see, if we can not love the brother who we do see.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week 5). this quote speaks volumes as to the way that we need to treat our brothers and sisters on this earth. far too often people are selfish and only hold their own values or goals in mind and never care to help others or take a minute to ask someone how their day is. i believe that a crucial part of the community is coming together and being selfless the way i spoke about above. when i watched the clip “because i love you, double whiskey'' someone muttered “you deserve what it feels to be disrespected” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundationmoreau fye week 4). i believe that in my community, no one should ever feel disowned or disrespected to the point where they feel the way this person did and seek revenge. this is something that i have struggled with in my relationships in the past that have not ended the best that they could have. god would want for someone to forgive the other person and put it behind them. after all, we are taught to be forgiving in the church. that does not mean that you have to forget about it, but i believe forgiveness is key. i also believe that i am made to be a representation of something bigger than myself. being an athlete here at the university of notre dame, i believe that it is my responsibility to represent this school with class and respect in everything i do and say which pertains to the school. with this being said, i also believe it is my job to make sure that those around me do the same and i have to hold my teammates accountable so we can become the best unit that we can be. i believe that i pursue truth through my relationship with my family and with god. god is all powerful and almighty, the knower of all things good and bad. i believe that having a great foundation for my relationship with god will lead me to see truth in places where others can’t. relationships with god can be very complex, and this is why using my family to pursue truth is also extremely important. the people around me can be my greatest asset, as using them to bounce ideas off of will make me a smarter and far more well rounded person. i believe that it is also my job to take care of my parents. they raised me from a small child into an adult, and i owe it to them to help them out when they need it. as i stated in my ‘where i’m from poem’ “where i’m from we are taught to respect our elders, especially our grandparents. without them, we would have a much worse foundation for what our family life looks like. we are taught to look after each other within my family, all 9 of us” (“where i’m from poem” moreau fye week 6). the last belief i’d like to speak about is that we are all created equal in the eyes of god. “there are perceptual illusions, for example, in which white subjects perceive black faces as angrier than white faces with the same expression. race can bias people to see harmless objects as weapons when they are in the hands of black men and to dislike abstract images that are paired with black faces. and there are dozens of variants of laboratory tasks finding that most participants are faster to identify bad words paired with black faces than white faces” (“how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7).i believe that this is unacceptable as a society and something that the world is still working on. it hurts me that our society is still fighting racial stereotypes, but i know we will get through it. integration 2 taylor kelly moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 integration 2: lost in south bend(home alone reference) as i sit here writing my final assignment for the semester, it feels weird. it doesn’t feel like i’ve been here for a full semester, or at least not yet. maybe it will after finals, or maybe it won’t. that doesn’t change the fact that in two short weeks i will officially be one eighth of the way through my college experience, and that sort of scares me. as someone who is undecided for their major and isn’t sure what comes next for them after college, it’s hard to feel like you’re being prepared for the world when you don’t even know what you want to be prepared for. despite these feelings and anxiety about not knowing my path academically or professionally, none of this is to say that my first four months here have not better prepared me for the greater world and what i will encounter in it. that is the question of this assignment: what have i encountered and how will i respond? in my time here so far, i have encountered many different types of people and circumstances or problems that i had never before experienced in my life. those encounters are valuable and although many of them may come in the classroom, there are just as many important and significant things i have experienced outside the classroom as well. when i fly back home to massachusetts in two weeks, i am sure like every college student ever my family and parents of friends will comment on how i look older, and how i should shave my poor attempt at a beard. but more than just looking older, after a few months here i feel older, and that is due to the experiences i’ve had and things i’ve encountered so far. one of the big things i’ve encountered through my first semester here is confusion. although that may not seem like a very positive thing to encounter, in reflecting on it i recognize that there is a lot of value in not knowing, and the journey of finding your way is just as important as the destination of knowing. if it wasn’t clear from my opening paragraph, i really have no clue what i want to do with my life. i have an idea of the things i am good at and what i find interesting, but the fact of the matter is that for any question involving the future my answer most likely is “i don’t know”. at first i was a little embarrassed telling my mendoza-attending and pre-med peers that i didn’t have a major or a career aspiration yet, but i’ve come to appreciate it instead. i’ve always been someone who loves learning new things, and not having a rigid plan for my future has allowed me to take classes that seem exciting without the pressure of feeling locked into a certain subject or major. there are still times when i have doubts about what the future holds, but in those moments i remind myself that god has a plan for me. i think this goes along with what fr. jenkins c.s.c. said in week 10, “even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.moreau fye week 10). i find this to be very true with my own struggles over what i am going to do with my life, as i often get caught up in whether a certain job pays well enough or if the careers i am considering are “good” enough, and i think that comes back to the pressures of the outside world making it hard to follow your heart, as we are too busy comparing ourselves to others or standards that don’t truly matter. this sentiment also relates back to a quote from week 9 that stuck out to me, where julia hogan writes, “trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-find-your-calling/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-find-your-calling/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau 9). being caught up in which majors have the biggest paycheck at 25 or which of my peers are going to get the most impressive internships doesn’t do me any good. it’s up to me to look inward and listen to god’s plan so that i can find what the most fulfilling path is for me in life, not for anyone else. i have found just having conversations with other students or even professors or other faculty can be very helpful in getting a gauge on what futures seem compelling or fulfilling to me. i think back on our conversation we had about the ace program, and that is just one example of the many different ways i can search for my calling on my own, without being concerned about what others are doing or what others think i should be doing. another big thing i have encountered so far this year is humility. between my peers and professors at both holy cross and notre dame, there are so many people with impressive resumes, interesting backgrounds, and inspiring stories. what always stands out to me though, is how so many of these people are so nonchalant about what they have accomplished or what they have been through. i think with my own health struggles in high school and the hardships i continue to face with my health, sometimes i can get too into a “woe is me” type mindset, where i feel that no one else has been through what i’m going through, or people just don’t understand. although i don’t want to short sell myself and my issues, a big moment of humility came for me here when i found out one of my best friends’ mom had passed away a few years back. this was something he never really talks about, nor should he feel that he has to, but it was a pretty powerful realization for me in seeing how he handles that and continues to do great things despite what he has faced in his own life. i think this experience connects back to a line in our community module, “receptivity involves inner work.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmermoreau fye week 11). this idea of inner work is something that is important for all of us, and i think that is especially true with humility, where in order to http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ be more receptive and better members of our community, we need to be able to work on ourselves and have the humility that it takes to be the best versions of ourselves. the third and final thing that i have encountered that i want to talk about is struggles. although i’ve enjoyed my first semester here, in many ways it was far from the ideal transition to college. i found myself constantly sick for much of the semester, with frequent trips to urgent care, two trips to the er, and too many missed classes and exams to count. much like with my health issues in high school, there were times where going through these things definitely tested my faith, and when i recognize that i am feeling out of touch with my faith, i’ve felt ashamed. last week, we read an excerpt from c.s. lewis’ the screwtape letters, and the line about god and free will that says “he wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles.”(“the screwtape letters” by c. s. lewismoreau fye week 12) has provided me with a lot of comfort. i think it is important that we remember that even in difficult times where we make a mistake or our faith is tested, god still loves us. he doesn’t expect us to be perfect or to always have the strongest relationship with him, but he does want us to want that strong relationship for ourselves, and to make our own conscious effort to be close with him through our thoughts, words, and actions. overall, i have encountered many new things throughout this semester. although not all have been positive on their own, they become positive in using them to grow and become a better person, and that is what i hope to do and continue to do throughout my time here, and wherever life takes me after that. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192748?module_item_id=109545 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192748?module_item_id=109545 microsoft word eulogy of (integration 3).docx eulogy of : a life well lived and well done carlos was the light of my life. those that knew him would agree that he had a wicked sense of humor that created such a wonderful atmosphere for all those who were around. even when i was little, i remember him making me laugh so much i would nearly cry. no one was upset around carlos for too long – although he did have his serious side too, of course. pride could be said to describe carlos' life. he was proud to be puerto rican. he could love nothing more than spending as much time as he could hidden away in the mountains of the municipality of jayuya, eating lechon and tostones with friends or just hiking through the mountains. it was because of that love for puerto rico would always lead carlos to tackle puerto rico’s problem as they were his own. carlos’ dream was to return to puerto rico with a notre dame degree and be there for every natural disaster or economic issue to be at least one more man on the job. this is a skill he only fortified at notre dame and that was preached by the famous father hesburgh himself ("hesburgh" by jerry barca & christine o'malley moreau fye week two). incredibly, the only thing carlos loved more than the island itself was puerto rican culture and family. carlos advocated for the creation of as many connections as you could in your community. this is something all puerto ricans learned during hurricane maria because it is those emotional connections that bind a community together take make it all the much stronger and happier as both coexistence and overcoming adversity is achieved ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francismoreau fye week seven). being both a friend of carlos as well as a fellow puerto rican, i can remember all the times carlos would mention in conversations either by text or calls during our days in college expressing everything he missed from the society he left in puerto rico. carlos was also proud of his friends and family; anyone that was friends with carlos would always know a handful of carlos' family members' and other friends' names and a tangential story to accompany those names. most importantly, pride describes how we all here today feel about having carlos be a part of all our lives. having known carlos my whole life, i regard myself as one of the lucky few who can call themselves as "carlos historians". while i have there are seemingly endless amount of stories i could share with you all that would serve as an testament to carlos' exceptional character and persona, the only one i must repeat in front of you all regards our upbringing in puerto rico. it was right after my single mother had to move away to work in the states, but making the tough choice of allowing me to remain in puerto rico for my final two years of high school with the rest of my friends and family. while it had been my decision to remain behind in puerto rico, it did not make the unavoidable sadness suddenly disappear. being only sixteen at the time, i could not live by myself. the solution to this came in the form of 's care, devotion, and kindness as he somehow managed to convince his family to allow me to live with him for what was potentially an indefinite amount of time. carlos, to be able to even present such an offer to me, had to not only convince his parents to quite literally feed another mouth as if they had adopted a new son overnight, but also solve the logistical issue of where i would sleep. in case anyone was wondering, i just turned the guest bedroom into my room; carlos was limited by the fact he could not just construct a new bedroom by hand, but if he could, i am sure he would have done just that. for the next year and a half, carlos became like a brother to me. we shared meals, alternated who would drive to school in the morning, and even his dogs would occasionally respond to me before carlos himself. beyond just daily interaction, carlos and i would even delve into deeper topics such as the night when we just were reminiscing about hurricane maria. it was not one of those conversations full of humor, but we talked about a topic that is especially relevant now: always remember you are going to die, so live your life without wasting a moment. carlos did just that ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). for the first two months after my mom had left puerto rico, it was carlos who would quite literally be there for me, no matter the time. when i just needed someone to vent out my frustrations regarding the whole situation, he would just listen. for those crucial first few months, carlos was flawless to his dedication to being not only my friend, but my confidant. that trust held true even through college as we both frequently had conversations about how our majors of choice did not determine out lives. we both made a promise to each other to prioritize finding careers that fit us, instead of forcing ourselves into careers we don’t enjoy ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). despite my mother being able to return to work in puerto rico halfway through our senior year of high school, and allowing me to return back what used to be normality for me, i cannot help but regard that year and a half i lived alongside carlos as one of the most memorable parts of my life. carlos' passions in life were not limited to interacting with friends and family. i was lucky enough to have participated in many of carlos' outdoor hobbies. i was his lifelong fishing buddy as we pillage the caribbean ocean for as many mahi-mahis as we could over the years. i was his hiking partner across many trips from the central mountain range in puerto rico to the final mountain in the appalachian trail, mount katahdin, all the way in maine. carlos loved hiking to be alone with the wilderness, to be able to be in an empty space relative to society and life that he always told me he “could feel in his bones” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico layer moreau fye week one). it was on those hikes that carlos explained his approach to self-reflection during his moments of solitude. he suggested to not get caught up in our own minds. too much introspection can lead to only more confusion about who you are. carlos shared with be that only small bursts of introspection are healthy and to live your life without worrying too much about your own image of yourself ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). one hobby i was never able to match carlos in no matter how many times he invited you to learn was slalom water skiing. one thing that unites both carlos’ love for the tropics and mountains would be his love for cooking for those he cared about. i will never forget his concentration while manning a barbeque as he perseveres through heat or cold to make sure he was proud to present his friends and family with a meal that matched his love for them. i will never be able to recall eating with carlos and not be smiling. there is a phrase in puerto rico that goes “la grasa que nos une” which roughly translate to the lard that brings us together which i feel perfectly reflects all the times eating longaniza, making hamburgers, and grilling steaks with carlos made us somehow one step closer to each other. carlos was a true man of the seas and mountains, but never facing any of them without the company for any of those attending this solemn event today. i would like to thank all those who have come here today to celebrate carlos’s life. i am certain that any and all those in attendance today all share the same grief of having lost the man you all both cared for as much as he cared for you in return. i especially want to thank carlos’ older sister for being always providing carlos with discerning conversations that always led to personal growth and self-reflection. carlos always said if it wasn’t for his sister, he would not have been able to realize himself to switch majors in his freshman year of college (discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week five). despite time healing all wounds, time will never let us forget the man who was carlos unanue. from his character and humor that would light up any room to his care and attention to all those he held dear to his heart, the aspects of what made carlos the man he was will live on with us for as long as we exist. microsoft word integration 1.docx how can i grow over the next four years? i believe that i grow as a person by making connections and getting to know as many people as possible. i have grown up in a very homogeneous community, everyone i knew looked similar to myself, had similar beliefs, and had similar life stories. naturally, i assumed that everyone should believe the way i did and never really knew what diversity was, until i went to work as a senate page. i realized that these other students from across the country were very different from what i assumed about them. as adichie said in her ted talk in week 7, i had one story that i knew about them. i believed them to be diametrically opposed to the values and culture of people like me. however, i realized that once i got to know them, i had so much more in common with them than i could have ever imagined. i made lifelong friendships as a senate page, because i focused on making connections and getting to know people for who they are. i now understand that “there is never a single story about any place” (the danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). this outlook has changed the way i seek to associate with people around me. i seek to get to know as many people as possible, and for them to truly get to know me. in dr. brown’s ted talk she mentions that people who have a strong sense of belonging were “willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (the power of vulnerability by dr. brene brown – moreau fye week 1). when i make connections with people, i make it my goal to be my authentic self because i shouldn’t pretend to be someone, i’m not just to be friends with someone. if someone cannot accept me for who i am, or i cannot accept someone else for who he or she is, then neither of us has any business being in a relationship together. i also think this outlook ties into the idea of how i want people to think about me. in his ted talk, david brooks talks about our resume versus eulogy virtues, our marketplace quality and what people say about our character. he says that most of us would agree that “the eulogy virtues are the most important of the virtues” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks – moreau fye week 2). in making connections with other people at a deep level, i hope to be known as someone who lives my friends and family up, as someone who people want to have around, and as someone who makes the days of the people around him better. i think that by pursuing this end i can ensure that i both benefit the people around me and benefit from my relationships with them. forming deep connections with people helps me to ensure that my relationships are healthy. as i said earlier, i do not pursue relationships with people if i don’t feel that we can connect at a deeper level. one way to identify a toxic relationship is that “they don’t really listen to you” (5 signs you're in a toxic relationship by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week 4). i am a big fan of talking to people, so if i cannot have meaningful conversations with someone, i will not spend much time around that person. a personal need that i have is to connect with the people i am around, this forces me to choose friends who i feel can lift me up, and not those who will tear me down or hold me back. i definitely believe that my upbringing has shaped my worldview, the culture of west texas has significantly influenced my personality and beliefs. in my poem for week 6, i wrote, “i am from a land of hard work and honesty where a man is as good as his word” (where i’m from by – moreau fye week 6). i feel that this emphasizes my life code. i believe strongly in being honest and kind to the people around me, and i believe that no matter what i do, god sees it, so i should do the right thing, simply because it is the right thing to do. this is often very difficult, but i know that when god asks me why i didn’t do the right thing, “it was too hard,” will not be an acceptable answer. one of the biggest aspects of our community back home was faith. although, most of my friends were not catholic, almost everyone i knew was christian. everybody in the community attended some church on sunday, and the most common question to ask someone you just met was: “what church do you go to?” everybody around me cared a lot about their faith and wanted to live good, christian lives. one of the things that drew me to notre dame was the faith community; i wanted to continue the experience i had at home, and continue to focus on god. david fagerberg, when he was speaking about how we use spirituality as a light, said that if the light was working correctly, we should “be able to see the real world around [us], and the neighbor with whom [we] should be concerned” (faith brings light to a dark world by david fagerberg – moreau fye week 3). i want to focus on using faith as a framework with which i can keep my focus on the things that are truly important, not distractions, such as money, which turn our eyes away from god and towards evil. faith provides me a moral framework with which i can focus on the world around me and myself. another deep-seeded attribute of myself, is my love of learning. i love to learn new things about the world around me and the events of the day. one of the things i value about the community here, is its commitment to combining learning and spirituality into overall personal growth. in fr. grove’s speech, he emphasized the importance that moreau and the congregation of the holy cross put on the combination of faith and knowledge, saying “both [blind faith and blind reason] are equally abhorrent” (two notre dames: your holy cross education by fr. kevin grove – moreau fye week 5). one of my goals in my time in college is to learn about the world and use my faith as a framework through which to view the world. i feel that knowledge guided by faith can be one of the most effective tools for making the world a better place. i believe that by making connections with as many people as i can and maintaining my commitment to my faith, i can grow exceptionally well throughout my next 4 years at notre dame. week 8integration one oct 14, 2021 prof. bryan reaume integration one journey of my transformation: the story of knowing myself i believe that humans will always have the ability to rise above any situation. we don’t know what life is or why we are in this world; all we know, all we feel, is that we must protect it any way we can. buddha said it clearly: “life is suffering.” life is meant to be challenging and living requires consistent work and review. by default, life is difficult because we must strive to earn happiness and success. throughout my whole life i was very much vulnerable for being a perfectionist and the majority of the time i have suffered mentally and psychologically. i feel vulnerable to try to get a hundred percent done. however, in the meantime i forget that i have uniqueness in myself and that is the reason i'm not someone else. i believe that i am me and god has an intention on me. i think we all are living an illusion of being perfect and want to be elon musk, or jeff bezos, but we often forget the things about our uniqueness. it is also a presentation of the dilemma of vulnerability as well. i was so surprised to realize that "vulnerability can lead a person to fear and shame, and at the same time it can lead you to joy and positivity.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this is the reason people often consider themselves as vulnerable and this is the source of the question that comes from their inner self: am i the authentic self? (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreau fye week two) i believe in authenticity. for the past years, i thought that vulnerability is only the way to mental and psychological destruction. however, now my point of view on vulnerability has changed and i believe that vulnerability also may lead to a person's authenticity (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreau fye week two). our inner world works well when there is an equilibrium in our outer self. to reach peace, we need to surrender to something outside ourselves to gain power https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim within ourselves. we ought to offer ourselves what we love and get what makes us happy by overcoming our desires. we need to know that we have a crystal clear mind and a reflection of our deeds. we are far more essential than our worldly accomplishments. to reach our authentic selves, we need to be aware of our faith and triumph. indeed, faith is inevitable and beneficial. when i started my college application i was so vulnerable to people's opinions that i hardly realized the value of joy. but the same vulnerability was my source of joy when i got accepted to university of notre dame. it reminded me that i think vulnerability is a characteristic that god makes us strong and learn from our mistakes. the moment when i realized that god has gifted his blessings upon me and gave me the power of uniqueness, i started to feel happy and cheerful. as a result, i could use positivity to my life. being our authentic self is what we all are looking for and what god wants everyone of us to seek. i immigrated to this country in july 2018 from bangladesh. the united states was a new country with a new culture, new people, and a new language. the toughest challenge was to learn a new language. i came from a country where people normally speak bengali and no other languages. as a newcomer, i faced a lot of bizarre problems. our first two months in this country were full of hardship. we moved from state to state since our parents couldn't find any jobs anywhere. my family struggled for food. financial barriers almost halted my education and i had a difficult situation brewing in my house. each day ended with my family hoping for a better tomorrow. yet i have realized that life is more fickle than i had imagined; it can change at any time. i realized my true potential. i started to trust in my faith. i have realized that the most important journey i could ever have is the journey of self-discovery (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick, moreau fye week three). there is something holy inside of me that is asking me to have faith in myself. i started to have confidence in my authentic self. it was as though there was a giant hand reaching out of the sky, picking me up, and placing me backward every time i tried to move forward. in the face of these overwhelming odds, i kept repeating to myself, "don't stop. you're almost there." it was my faith that empowers me to exceed my comfort zone. from the person who just came from bangladesh knowing nothing about english to a more confident, authentic entrepreneur who has interned in bank of america, goldman sachs, and blackrock, my journey of faith is the most empowering experience i've ever had. my faith has taught me life is not an easy path, and if you want to be like https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry the sun, you have to burn like the sun. faith has changed my whole attitude of how i see the world and believe in positivity. in our busy lives, we often might feel emptiness in our day-to-day life. i felt overwhelmed with the stress i have in my life: stress from perfection and procrastination. in this dark moment, faith is what guided me to light. the light leads us to the ultimate success. we often underestimate the value faith can have on our lives, then end up with something we regret. i believe that simply having faith in ourselves can change the whole mindset: inspiring us to be the best version of ourselves. my life took an interesting turn in university of notre dame. in my first week, i was so bewildered and felt culture shock every few hours. before progressing to study at notre dame, i anticipated very little to be different from my hometown. culture shock was not something that even crossed my mind. upon my appearance, nevertheless, it took no more than 10 minutes for that to swap. while generally accepted with open arms, i soon understood that being an asian from new york city would enhance an unexpected and unavoidable identifier. as i introduced myself and even to the people who soon became my most intimate friends, i could not help but notice a kind of wide-eyed enthusiasm.“you’re from bangladesh!” as soon as my nationality was brought up, i found myself barraged with questions. it is a fun social analysis when meeting new people here. i have learned and realized that whether from bangladesh or anywhere else, culture shock might rear its head regardless of where you come from. ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon, moreau fye week six) it does not have to be a counteractive experience, though. so if a nationality identifier gets earmarked on you, rock it. show them home pictures, stay true to who you are, and try not to take any stereotypical questions seriously. but i understand with the support of a campus community dedicated to my growth and development; i will have the opportunity to explore every interest at notre dame. i will find my niche, embark on new adventures, and make friends for life. altogether, i have realized that life is not always an easy road, and i know that it’s essential to plan, work hard and see our goals through to achieve success and i hope to utilize these skills to be successful in notre dame. in my life, i have faced many situations where i acted upon my stereotypes rather than my actual consciousness. stereotypes are very harmful in a way that it limits your mind in a box of confined knowledge. in analytical studies, hasty http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html generalization is a massive logical fallacy. hasty generalizations form stereotypes. in her ted talk, chimamanda advised us to stop thinking about stereotypes; instead, we should be open to information and respect everyone’s weaknesses ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie, moreau fye week seven). when i decided that i would be majoring in business, many people laughed at me and advised me to take engineering. many people urged me to pursue computer science since they have stereotypes about asians that they are good at that. part of me wanted to pursue business to prove them wrong. to prove them, asians can be hedge fund managers and be the next wolf of wall street. i have realized that to pursue the truth, i have to be confident and authentic to myself. self-discovery is the quest for truth. however, the instant you believe, you have arrived at the fact. it transforms into something else something unscientific. self-discovery is the never-ending search for truth, which fades away like the horizon. the horizon is visible. we can make progress in that direction. but we’ll never get there. this isn’t a nebulous invitation to question one’s belief in reality. but it’s a good reminder to keep looking for new evidence to back up even the most well-worn truths. i believe that the best way to forge life-giving relationships would be to establish your intimate relationship with god because he would guide you throughout your relationships with the other emergent people from your society ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign, moreau fye week four). it has clearly emphasized the importance of a close relationship with god through strengthening your faith and beliefs for his will. in the time when i was depressed with my life, i tried to have a reflection on god’s grace in my life. after the reflection i feel good about myself. this is how i want to live my life, with this optimistic attitude that every day is another chance for success. i have seen it first-hand by coming to this country with my family and overcoming hardships. we have the opportunity to enrich our perspective on life, to correct our mistakes, and to simply move on (2021 laetare medalist address by carla harris, moreau fye week five). the intimate relationship with god is the most powerful tool that we could use to reach all our plans in life that must be in https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 accordance with his will. so, we should constantly be reminded that we should prioritize our god in achieving our goals in life. every morning when i wake up, i want to be excited by the gift of a new day. i know i am being idealistic and that my philosophy on life could be comparable to a calculus limit, unreachable. but i won't give up on it because i can still get infinitely close and that is incredible. this is how i want to live my life, with this optimistic attitude that every day is another chance for success. i have seen it first-hand by coming to this country with my family and overcoming hardships. we have the opportunity to enrich our perspective on life, to correct our mistakes, and to simply move on. integration #1: breaking my beliefs breaking my beliefs of the many i believe statements i've made in my life, from the innocent, ignorant, increments i professed as a child, to the ones i confess now, i've made quite a bit of i believe statements throughout life. yet, looking at this prompt, and inspite the amount of directions, instructions, and startups given, i still had to think for a while about what i believe. who would have thought that such a common statement that we profess every day in life knowingly and unknowingly would cause me this much turmoil and aggravation? ultimately, i decided at the end of the day that i would discuss as many beliefs as i can from the ones that shaped my childhood, to the ones i know, and learn from now. i believe that everything happens for a reason. of course, this common statement is not anything surprising. it is a saying confessed everywhere, and by everyone, including the ones who don't believe it either. since i was a child, i went to church. i still remember the praise dances we did on special occasions such as mother’s day and father’s day, christmas, and easter. i remember my igbo songs and the beating of the drums as we, the church, sang in harmony about the glory of god. god. he who knows everything and should not be questioned. ( “https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universit yofnotredamecampusministry” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.moreau fye week three). yet, as i grew older i began to question him. i was scared to question him and things “he would do”. i wasn't supposed to question him, i thought. whatever occurred, happened because he wanted it to happen. but i still found myself pondering why jesus, a man who i was told loved me, would make me and my close friend get into a fight? why was it that i got in trouble on the school bus https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry when i was younger, and was embarrassed in front of the whole bus? why would these things happen? there were always moments in life when i would think that. all these experiences made me feel the one thing i hated feeling, because i couldn't control it:vulnerable. vulnerability: “vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, love…”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i always hated being vulnerable. it was the worst feeling ever. i never associated it with neither good nor bad, but the power of vulnerability versus the need to numb that very feeling was a recurring theme in my childhood days. god wasn’t supposed to make me feel vulnerable. he wasn’t supposed to put me in vulnerable situations, in which i felt exposed, and naked to the things-teh “adams”. i did not want people to see. (“https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllw train” by david brooksmoreau fye week two). i wanted my strong side to show. the laughing side and intelligent side, not the weak parts. but as i stated before: everything happens for a reason. i eventually began seeing the reasons. the reason i fail;eda test, got into a fight, got in trouble, broke ties with my closest friend, was all for a reasona good one at that. these things caused me to be the girl i am today. that friend i used to hold on to was manipulative, and it needed for me to be put in a vulnerable position, in which we did get into a fight, for me to see that the toxic friendship needed to go. (“https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week four) the times i got embarrassed in front of the schoolbus, and things didn't go my way, were the times my other adam was to be seen, and embraced. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ these moments taught me to accept both parts of myself wholeheartedly. i should not weigh one over the other, nor should i strive to only embody one over another. having multiple adams is a good combination that builds character. one should not be valued more than the opposite. similarly, vulnerability, in spite of the kind of the core of shame and fear it brings, appears to be the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, love. i've always regarded vulnerability as a trait that is neither bad nor good, i never once had tried to acknowledge it as something that could be the core of many positives in life. in a way it is a type of authenticity, and as someone who seeks truthfulness over all kinds of relationships in [my] life, be it platonic or intimate, i surprisingly learned that being fully vulnerable is an emotion we should embrace. it keeps our connection and ultimately understanding of and with others raw. i am from sweatsuits and church dresses, to sneakers and high heels. i am from the color green and white the color of a nation far but near. from bacon, egg, and cheese with an arizona in the mornings to jollof rice and eba in the night time. all these things are for a reason. (“where i’m from poem”moreau fye week five and six). these things happened for a reason as well. the blending of cultures i experienced growing up was god’s way of telling me that i’m unique. i used to be ashamed of the background i’m from, especially because it was that of a country in which many stories were told for it by the people in power to form it. (“chimamanda ngozi adichie: the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week seven). i was even impressionable enough at a tender age to believe those fables, so i hid in the shadows, trying to blend in with the crowd. however, now i see, i’m of that background for a reason. i embrace it and wear it around my classrooms for a reason. i speak igbo, and put on https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story “shaku” during dance africa club nd for a reason. i’m in asa and bsa for a reason. these reasons are to be exemplified, not minimized. so, even now, as i sit in this library chair, and reflect on what my life has been like and my core beliefs-or should i say belief from childhood till college, i know there was a reason i chose nd, and it chose me.i am from the name lisa, derived fromelisabeth in the bible; the ultimate mix of anything and everything. notre dame is the ultimate mix of everything. it is where we come to connect our minds, heart, and soul, something i am doing and hope to continue doing throughout my time here, and life onwards. because, everything happens for a reason. several existential crises later, i believe i need meaning. integration 1 – due october 15 i believe that i pursue truth by speaking honestly, asking questions, being open to alternate perspectives, and encouraging honesty in others. i developed this belief because of my value of honesty. i’ve known for a while that honesty is something that i consider important and prioritize in my interactions with other people, and i know that i want to be honest not only with them, but also with myself. i think that this belief certainly influences the way that i interact with other people; it can sometimes come at a detriment to me, though, when i would rather tell the truth even if it isn’t what someone wants to hear, and i have to choose whether to uphold this value or to avoid hurting anyone’s feelings (or to just not respond). though all of us at notre dame are seeking truth in some form or another – whether it be through religion, academic knowledge, or some other truth – i think that pursuing truth is not only about getting it from others; it is also about finding it within yourself. i try to encourage myself to be honest as well as seeking out knowledge and true information. part of the truth that i try to pursue is that of an existence of god or some divine being – this is something that i like to discuss with other people and hear different perspectives on. as i try to search for this dimension of truth, i am challenged by something that father pete says in his video: “resist the temptation to compare yourself against what others profess to know and believe” (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick, moreau fye week three). this temptation challenges me to abandon the way that i search for religious truth, because it makes me feel as though i should already have some answer to the question of an existence of god because my peers may already have an answer which they consider truth, like in the “student reflections on faith” from week three. i think, however, that it is good to be in this type of situation because i am able to ask questions about people’s beliefs and how they developed them, from which i can reach my own conclusions about religion. in the future, i can more actively seek out these conversations, rather than solely being open to having them when they occur; if i actively pursue truth in this way, i can make this belief a more integral part in my life. i believe that i am searching for a way to make my life most meaningful and connections with others. i believe this because of my experiences in the past few years. during the first quarantine, prompted by an episode of the good place and an existential-crisis-influenced dream, i started the search for both things, and that is how i developed this belief – i started thinking about life and how limited our time is, and i decided that it was critical to search for meaning which would make it worthwhile. this search makes me think about the resume and eulogy virtue distinction and the contrast between success-driven adam i and the virtue-driven adam ii (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two); i feel like meaning is not found in the resume virtues, no matter how far that gets me in my life. i think that meaning is created in a way that can be taken to the grave with you, not in a way that can be succinctly described on paper. i’ve been hoping to find meaning for a while now, and i think that it is found to some extent through other people. this belief shapes my actions in that it makes me more open to meeting new people and taking on new opportunities; it also drives me to try to look for things that both make me happy and contribute to things beyond myself. since i started believing this fairly recently, this particular belief hasn’t come with many challenges; currently, i am fairly resolute that these are things i am searching for. although sometimes i wonder about what kind of connections will help me feel the most fulfilled and happy, i don’t doubt that this is something i am searching for. looking back on the talk by dr. brown about vulnerability and “wholehearted” people (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), i note that i want to be this way with this belief; i want to be unafraid to make these connections that i search for, and so far, i’ve been mostly successful with this while at notre dame, though i am sometimes intimidated when trying to connect with new people. she says that these people have a “willingness to do something where there are no guarantees,” mainly in reference to relationships, but i also take this to be significant in reference to finding ways to make life meaningful. we have no guarantee that the meaning we find in our lifetimes (if we find it) means anything; for all we know, when we die, our consciousness dies and we just stop existing, which would mean that the purpose and meaning we’ve worked for has no real significance (that or our soul goes to a different body after we die, if we want to think about philosophy). i still believe it is worthwhile to search for meaning, even though we have no guarantee that there is some outcome in the universe, whether we think about that as heaven or hell or some other non-place. to return to my search for connections with others, this also became a pivotal part of my search because of the isolation i felt in quarantine. this search drives me to be more introspective and investigate the kind of friend i want to be and the kind of friends i want to have. because of this, the articles we’ve discussed about relationships were striking to me, and i think that they have resonated with me in the time since we read them as my friendships have become closer. because i am searching for worthwhile relationships and connections, i must consider the characteristics of toxic friendships (the issue that has come up for me the most recently is the constant negativity, which i have to either dissociate from or bring it up directly). this root belief of mine means that i have to be more active in being the type of friend i want to see in the world, who is less negative, a good listener, and dedicated to the friendship, unlike toxic friends (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four) i think that, in the future, i can more specifically act with this belief in mind by taking advantage of more opportunities to help other people, like service projects, and to work on introducing myself to more people in my classes to try to make friends, and i can reflect on my interactions with others to avoid being toxic. i believe that my purpose is to help others in ways big and small, to use my gifts and abilities for things beyond myself. i believe this because this is what makes me feel the most fulfilled; when i can act in this way, i feel proudest of myself and feel like i am working toward some greater meaning in life, though, of course, i don’t know what specifically that meaning is. for me, this belief originated as i did the actions that make up this purpose. as i used my abilities to help other people, i realized that this makes me happier. things as small as having an oddly specific memory of a concession stand on gameday when a friend was looking for that exact stand make me feel happier and fulfilled, which is why i believe this. this belief is challenged when i have a choice between helping others and benefiting myself – i might have limited resources and time, so i am forced to decide between doing what may work best for me and what would be beneficial for everyone. this belief implies that i ought to prioritize the well-being of others over myself and that it should be my goal to develop my talents such that they will be the most useful toward this purpose. i can consider carla harris’s speech with reference to this belief: she describes that “we should… be extremely intentional with our time and spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). i can use my gifts in such a way that gives me what i consider the largest return on my time – through helping other people. i feel like i am contributing to some greater purpose, which is why i consider this a purpose of mine. moving forward, i think that i can apply this belief to more situations, however small, and make sure that the contributions i can make are heard and acknowledged. i believe that i grow by learning from others with different experiences and facing challenges. like with my other root beliefs, i developed this belief through the actions listed in the belief. it was through facing challenges and talking with different people that i discovered that this was something that helps me improve myself and grow. i don’t typically doubt this belief, but there are instances that i struggle to see this light at the end of the tunnel, especially when facing challenges. when i wrote my “where i’m from” poem (moreau fye week six), i had to look back on the challenges that i’ve faced that brought me to where i am today. looking at them in retrospect, it is interesting to see the way that i’ve changed and grown, and i can see how i’ve changed; however, at the time, they were difficult periods for me during which it felt as though no good would result. for example, in my poem i mentioned how quarantine was difficult for me; though i initially thought that it would be nice to stay in, it was very isolating, and i went months with very minimal conversation with my friends. at the time, i thought there would be no good to come from it, but as i realized the difficulty, i developed a new appreciation for the people in my life and made sure that i actively searched for good things in each day. as such, this belief encourages me to persevere in the face of challenges. it also drives me to make sure i am open to hearing from people from different backgrounds. i thought that what we’ve learned about different backgrounds and how we shape people’s identities was important – like in the “danger of a single story,” our identities are shaped by the things that we hear most often (which i’ve learned about in my sociology class as well, interestingly enough) – “show a people as one thing… and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). content like this further encourages me to seek out different people and hear their stories before making judgements; because i know that hearing stories firsthand helps me to understand others better, and consequently, to grow and improve. i can seek out more opportunities to meet people with different experiences and backgrounds while i’m here, given the abundance of people with various backgrounds. in general, i’ve developed these beliefs throughout my lifetime, both through good experiences and challenges. in the future, i want to make sure i actively integrate these beliefs into my life and ensure that each day, i become a better person than i was yesterday. moreau integration two semester two moreau fye integration four making my mission: using tools from moreau to create my life goals my path for myself had always been set out. well, sort of. my parents had always pushed me to do what i wanted, at least most of the time. i have been supported by a family who has let me pursue a myriad of avenues and options. i wanted to be a dentist, a lawyer, the president, the first female one to be exact, a united nations representative, and many more. i have the plan all laid out, a house in connecticut, law school from georgetown and every minute detail in between. see, i am the type of person where being indecisive and not knowing what is next scares me. even if this plan changes, the end goal has become more and more clear: to be successful is to be happy in whichever pursuit i choose to follow. as of now the career is global economics focusing on the middle east. wherever that broad topic takes me, i aspire to be successful by being happy. these ideas are a daily mission statement which i work to follow. see, this mission has come from seeing my parents stay with the same job for my entire life. yes, this has provided our family with many benefits, but it has always made me wonder about the things one can do with their life. the monotony of everyday life scares me, yet i feel most safe in the routine. part of my mission statement is to enjoy breaking out of that continuous cycle and seeing the endless opportunities that notre dame and my life offer me. i will continue to take introspective surveys like the “7 clues: an interactive assessment activity” (week four) i completed for moreau. in the next three years i will be taking classes that i would not normally take, expanding myself to see if i could take extra majors or minors to make myself more well rounded, and participating in clubs and even events that i normally would not do. i know that notre dame and my college experience in total can and will change my life if i let it, the issue is letting it do that. from notre dame i have learned that the school “prize(s) the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame) (week ten). at notre dame i will interact with people with similar and different backgrounds and this will help me in many ways. this will help me not get trapped in echo chambers. as eitan hersh states in a podcast about people today, “ they care, and they feel hurt that politics isn't going the way they want it. and they feel joy when politics does go the way they want it. the thing is that what they're actually doing is not participating themselves in any active way” (hersh 5:23-5:37)(week eleven). i hope to not be wrapped up in emotion and take action, and i hope notre dame will help me do this. this will allow me to build upon my mission statement and make myself a better person in the long run. this will also add to my mission statement as it will force me not to be idle in my actions. i can see the issues around me and i need to know i have the power and compassion to change the problems. my mission statement will be influenced by what i have learned at notre dame. this will include reflecting on my life influenced by pico iyer (week one), remembering my life is short term influenced by theresa aletheia noble(week three), and asking those close to me what i can work on as a person from the “discernment conversation activity”(week five). adhering to these tools which i learned at notre dame in moreau, i can work on and continue to refine my mission statement which will continue to change throughout my lifetime. i also know that my mental health is front and center in my goals, using the tools from moreau i can help myself achieve this(week six). i can use my honesty and reflection to know what is best for me throughout my life and assess what i need to do to become the best version of myself. my mission statement is a guide map for my life. although my overall career or surroundings may change, my core values and inspirations will not change. i have always been inspired by my parents. they have shown my hard work, resilience and the power of grit. i have also had many other role models, i have aunts and grandparents who have sacrificed everything for others. i have friends whom i know have and will do anything for me and be there through anything for me. i understand and know this is a privilege that not many others receive. through pope francis’s words stating, “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people. and often there is this habit, by people who call themselves "respectable," of not taking care of the others, thus leaving behind thousands of human beings, or entire populations, on the side of the road” (pope francis 9:25-9:55)(week seven). i also know that it is not in my power to save someone, but rather to accompany them through their issues(week nine). i have seen role models at notre dame like hessburgh and the domer dozen(week two). i have seen the role models i followed at a young age increase as i grow up. i have seen people live their core values and mission statements. no matter how similar or different my role models’ statements may be i want to follow in their footsteps and follow my own. i have also narrowed my mission statement to know that my life is not infinite. i have written a eulogy to acknowledge what i need to work on during my life in order to live a life well lived(week eight). this, in turn, will help me mold and shape my mission statement. i will also be aware of the actions that i will participate in during my finite lifetime and know that my goals are better archived together. i have learned this from dean g. marcus cole(week twelve). so, using the tools of other statements including notre dame’s(week thirteen) and the knowledge i have gained throughout this semester, here is my final mission statement. i challenge myself to stay true to honesty, compassion, and love. i aim to love in honesty by holding myself and others around me to the standard of truth. i aim to be happy. a lofty statement which will be found in seeing compassion in others and the small things in life. i aim to use my knowledge and education to use it with compassion. i aim to let love guide me, through pain, suffering, and when i do not know what decision to make. i force myself to adhere to these core values and make it my mission that wherever my life takes me i will strive to use my talents to be my best self with honesty, compassion, and love being my guides. citations (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) (“domer dozen” by university of notre dame moreau fye week two) (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week three) (“7 clues: an interactive assessment activity ” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau week five) (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) (“integration three assignment” moreau fye week eight) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten) (“passion isn’t enough” by shankar vedantam and eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven) (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week thirteen) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ duty, responsibility, and competition growing up, my parents thrusted me into countless competitions. it didn’t matter the type of competition: spelling bees, mathematics, dance, or piano. my parents, both indian immigrants, lived and breathed competition. in a populous country like india, thousands compete for few opportunities. they struggled in a society in which one had to be crème de la crème to forge ahead. my parent’s view of success in a society never changed, not even after they moved to america. the same competitive culture in which they grew became my inheritance, my pride, and my framework. competition can be both a negative and positive thing. competitions can bring stress, trouble, and envy among friends. many people only hear “the single story” of competition, of its darker side. they pay heed to the “single story” which shows competition “as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what it becomes.” (“the danger of a single story by chimamanda adichie – moreau fye week 7) however, competitions can also help foster growth and comradery between groups of people. i’ve always been the “junior” one in everything. i skipped a grade, so i was always younger than my peers, and taking advanced classes only magnified the problem. when i first joined the academic decathlon (ad) team at 14, i remained the youngest as well. however, next year in ad, the “seniors” graduated, and i was one of two people that returned to the team. i wasn’t ever comfortable with a “senior” role, but my ad team needed someone to act as a “senior.” ad is not forgiving to inexperienced students. to succeed in ad, one must study in a completely different manner than in traditional education. i memorized thousands of statistics, lists, gave speeches and interviewed new and unchartered territory for me, to say the least. it goes without saying that our team (made up of mostly newcomers) would be at a disadvantage. to make up for this disadvantage, i did everything that was within my power; i set up impromptu study meetings, tutored the team in math, gave tips about speech and interview, made 53 flashcard sets, and advised the team on how to study for ad. in the end, although it wasn’t my intention, i became the unofficial leader of ad. every time we won a competition, the team would ask me to hold the trophy and jokingly ask me if my “back hurt after carrying the whole team.” this compliment (of sorts) would often confuse me because i didn’t seek praise. it made me happy to see my fellow team members succeed, and along with it, my school. although i was uncomfortable with the role in the beginning, i wouldn’t have given up my role for anything. i built up not only my resume values, but my “eulogy values” as wellmy “inner consistency and strength.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week 2) my team eventually grew to be a family of sorts, and the comradery i found there is priceless to me. we shared our “dreams, fears, and concerns with each other.” ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign – moreau fye week 4) i let myself become vulnerable with these people and gained “the courage to be imperfect” with them. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) over these past 4 years, i learnt so muchnot only from the competition studying, but from the authentic relationships i had within my team. i grow when i compete against others because they grow alongside me as well; friendly competition helps humanity as a whole grow. my parent’s emphasis on competition also stemmed from a desire to have me learn. the great hindu mythological kings and heroes they had told me of, arjuna and rama, prized wisdom and learning. these heroes won their battles not by their strength, but by their cunning and wisdom. i wanted to be just like them when i was younger, and even now, i think of them as figures to look up to and to model my behavior off of. just like the founder of holy cross believed in an approach to education involving “faith and reason”, i believe in pursuing truth by pursuing wisdom and knowledge about the world around me, and my hindu faith augments my belief. ( “two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father grove – moreau fye week 5) my hindu faith “alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” in this manner, giving me a fundamental approach to the world that serves me best. (“faith brings light to a dark world by professor fagerberg – moreau fye week 3) my culture and faith inherited from my parents doesn’t simply include competition. it also includes duty and responsibility. when i was younger, i had wondered what exactly my duties were. the great indian heroes ram and yudhishthira who i had idolized valued their duties above all else. however, they were the kings of countries; it was clear what their duties were. i was simply a kid. what kind of grand duties did i carry? when i was younger, i was disappointed by how simple and boring my responsibilities were. as time passed, i tutored my little brother and sister, not just in mathematics, but in life as well. only now, after my siblings and i were separated, do i truly recognize how heavy my duties actually were. i believe that i am responsible for my little brother and sister in every way. along with my parents, it is my duty to help my siblings grow into the best versions of themselves. george ella lyon, in her “where i’m from” poem, refers to herself as a “leaf-fall from the family tree,” her character originating in part from her grandfather and father’s guidance. (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week 6) my duties and responsibilities similarly originate from my place as a leaf in my family tree. in the end, duty, responsibility, and competition are all values i hold close to my heart. i believe that through wisdom and knowledge, i can pursue truth, and it is my responsibility to do so. i believe that through friendly competition and the meaningful relationships that come with, i can grow. last but not least, i believe my faith and culture, the framework that my parents passed down to me, are the foundation for these beliefs. duty, responsibility, and competition growing up, my parents thrusted me into countless competitions. it didn’t matter the type of competition: spelling bees, mathematics, dance, or piano. my parents, both indian immigrants, lived and breathed competition. in a populous country like india, tho usands compete for few opportunities. they struggled in a society in which one had to be crème de la crème to forge ahead. my parent’s view of success in a society never changed, not even after they moved to america. t he same com petitive culture in which they grew became my inheri t ance, my pride, and my framework . comp etition can be both a negative an d positive thing . c ompetitions can bring stress , trouble, and envy am ong friends. m a ny people only hear “ the single stor y ” of competition , of its darker side. t hey pay heed to the “ single story ” which shows competition “ as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is wh at it becomes. ” ( “ the danger o f a single story by chima manda adichie – m or eau fye week 7) however, competitions can also help foster grow th and comradery between groups of people . i’ve always been the “junior” one in everything. i skipped a grade, so i was always younger than my peers, and taking advanced classes only m agnified the problem. when i first joined the academic decathlon (ad) team at 14, i remained the youngest as well. however, next year in ad, the “seniors” graduated, and i was one of two people that returned to the team. i wasn’t ever comfortable with a “s enior” role, but my ad team needed someone to act as a “senior.” ad is not forgiving to inexperienced students. to succeed in ad, one must study in a completely different manner than in traditional education. i memorized thousands of statistics, lists, ga ve speeches and interviewed new and unchartered territory for me, to say the least. it goes without saying that our team (made up of mostly newcomers) would be at a disadvantage. to make up for this disadvantage, i did everything that was within my powe r; i set up impromptu study meetings, tutored the team in math, duty, responsibility, and competition growing up, my parents thrusted me into countless competitions. it didn’t matter the type of competition: spelling bees, mathematics, dance, or piano. my parents, both indian immigrants, lived and breathed competition. in a populous country like india, thousands compete for few opportunities. they struggled in a society in which one had to be crème de la crème to forge ahead. my parent’s view of success in a society never changed, not even after they moved to america. the same competitive culture in which they grew became my inheritance, my pride, and my framework. competition can be both a negative and positive thing. competitions can bring stress, trouble, and envy among friends. many people only hear “the single story” of competition, of its darker side. they pay heed to the “single story” which shows competition “as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what it becomes.” (“the danger of a single story by chimamanda adichie – moreau fye week 7) however, competitions can also help foster growth and comradery between groups of people. i’ve always been the “junior” one in everything. i skipped a grade, so i was always younger than my peers, and taking advanced classes only magnified the problem. when i first joined the academic decathlon (ad) team at 14, i remained the youngest as well. however, next year in ad, the “seniors” graduated, and i was one of two people that returned to the team. i wasn’t ever comfortable with a “senior” role, but my ad team needed someone to act as a “senior.” ad is not forgiving to inexperienced students. to succeed in ad, one must study in a completely different manner than in traditional education. i memorized thousands of statistics, lists, gave speeches and interviewed new and unchartered territory for me, to say the least. it goes without saying that our team (made up of mostly newcomers) would be at a disadvantage. to make up for this disadvantage, i did everything that was within my power; i set up impromptu study meetings, tutored the team in math, integration two daniel schrage professor friesen honors writing and rhetoric 6 september 2021 the beauty of community one of the most important topics we addressed this semester was the idea of being one’s most genuine self. this topic is relevant to me because i am going through a new era in my life right now. college is a time for people to figure out who they are, which is allowed by the increased freedom as well as responsibilities that come with it. throughout high school, i always struggled to truly be myself because i had some unhealthy friendships that i had to get rid of. i was scared to really be who i am and who i wanted to be. now that i am at college, however, i have found that the escape from the high school environment has allowed me to begin finding who i really am. the high school environment i am referring to consists of unreasonable expectations adding unnecessary stressors to everyone’s lives. they add stress because “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, moreau fye week nine). while setting achievable goals for oneself is a healthy habit, these goals should come from an individual person and be based on only that person. when we start comparing ourselves to everyone else around us, we do nothing but create more stress for ourselves. we need to be able to relax a little bit and give ourselves some credit for what we are doing as opposed to constantly comparing oneself to those around us. for example, there is a pressure in our society to “manufacture whatever we want or need—learning to relax and receive a gift requires hard work!” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven). being able to relax and appreciate oneself can be a difficult journey nowadays. however, in order to become my most genuine self, i need to worry less about societal expectations and learn to appreciate myself more for all the good things that i do. along with an altered look at societal expectations, college so far has taught me the beauty of living in a more diverse community. although diversity in the gateway program is not great, i have noticed that there is much more diversity not only in terms of backgrounds, but there is more diversity in terms of hobbies, interests, personalities, etc. i grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood, which did not accurately prepare me for the real world. i feel as though people at my high school are all very similar to each other because we all had very similar upbringings and experiences. i found that the similarities in our upbringings created a sort of expectation for all of us to become a certain person. it was because we all had the same upbringing that we had the same pressure to become this same “ideal” person. however, at college, there are people from all across the country, from rich and poor families, and from private schools and public schools. those are just a few examples of the differing experiences i have witnessed throughout my first semester at college. i feel that it has really opened my eyes to the real world and given myself a better perspective on how life really is. the importance of facing diversity is that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, moreau week twelve). according to fr. james b. king, it doesn't matter what religion we are or where we came from. we can become stronger and better people regardless of our backgrounds. that is why it is so important to celebrate our diversities while also realizing the common goals that we all share together. diversity, however, must come hand-in-hand with equality to ensure a fair society. this is why “the conflict between those who favor solutions from critical race theory versus those who prefer a common humanity approach has followed a predictable pattern of polarization. it mirrors the secular political discourse of the day, pitting cultural conservatives and progressives against each other” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory” by christopher j. devron, moreau fye week ten). i feel as though people today are arguing too much about the correct ways to go about these issues rather than realizing we are all fighting the same issues. everybody desires a society where there is equal chance and opportunity for everybody. the only way we can work towards an ideal society like that would be to unite and work together. as parker j. palmer puts it, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven). community is something we are all gifted with. everybody needs a community around themselves for support and guidance through the ups and downs of life. however, i believe that community, while it is a gift, needs to be nurtured and taken care of in order to ensure it remains healthy and prosperous. each individual person needs to open themselves up to the idea of community. on top of that, we all need to learn to be more accepting of each other and each other’s backgrounds. someone’s background does not define who they are and we should never treat someone in that way. everybody deserves a fair chance. the way we allow ourselves to become open to community is by cultivating “a capacity for connectedness through contemplation.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven). contemplation comes in times where we are able to disconnect ourselves from and allow our minds to think. i have found in my own life that making regular times to allow myself to meditate or even just block out distractions makes me a better person. i enjoy going on late-night car rides and walks often because i find that it is my space to clear my head and just relax. this time is crucial for myself to grow as a person because it is one of the only times that i am not being influenced by others. in today’s era, we are always connected to everyone else in the world, which is an amazing thing. however, it can cause problems when people stop thinking for themselves and allow others' ideas to take stock over their own. throughout life, everyone is going to face highs and lows and be challenged to remember who we are throughout all of life’s troubles. this is how we grow as people. this growth breeds a new sort of community that enables us to be stronger and more united. however, this is a very idealistic approach to this issue. we still face plenty of issues as a society today and many stem from arguments over people’s backgrounds. we as a society need to learn to accept everybody for who they are because facing diversity is how we grow as human beings. in order to progress towards a greater community, we need to spend time working on ourselves while also appreciating the diversity of others around us. what i can do to help our world it is always a difficult task to define myself, even though it may appear to people that i have things figured out in my life. the reason that it is difficult is due to my opinion that definitions of ourselves change throughout life. i believe that i am not the same person i was five years ago, and i most likely won’t be the same person five years from now. five years ago, i was lost and stuck with a feeling of no purpose in this world. now, i am a little less lost and completely free with a general idea of how i want to change the world. i hope in five years i will no longer be lost, and i will be pursuing my purpose in this everchanging world. yet, in the present i must give most credit to my sheer stubbornness and determination to pursue a future career in medicine to help sick individuals. it is crucial to understand where we come from to develop a path forward to who we want to be. i come from a family of wishers, the people who consistently want things out of life without planning to achieve it. i remember hearing them discuss these wants out of life and thinking “i don’t want to sit back and watch my life pass by without working for what i want”. this thought from a young age molded me to be a stubborn person who won’t sway on the important values in my life. i find determination and stubbornness somewhat synonymous, so i tend to use them interchangeably. however, due to my determination and consistent need to keep moving forward in life, i began to struggle with my mental health in the navy. i had felt stagnant and that i was failing at every aspect of that lifestyle. this idea of perfectionism somehow muddled with my determination to work towards my lifetime goals, like if i wasn’t perfect then there was no way of me reaching my goals. it is something that i have been working on throughout this first semester at notre dame, the concept that i can still be determined and work hard for what i want without acing everything that comes my way. as julia hogan writes in week nine, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” my initial commentary stated this is easier said than done, which i still agree with, but now i believe the more you practice this way of thinking-the easier it becomes. once i can master my strong trait of determination and not expecting too much perfection, i can really contribute to changing the world. i used to find my stubbornness exhausting and draining, but i have found it is the strength that will help me throughout this process. this determination will allow me to not give up in the face of constant failure and setbacks. it will be the trait that contributes to new concepts and ideas to my field because i won’t give up on the good that can come from it. in my opinion, determination supersedes natural intelligence because it trains a person to keep fighting even through the toughest times. this determination also allows for fear to be present but not be a hindrance. carla harris states “fear has no place in your success equation”, and determination is the key to work through that fear to stop it from being a variable. even though i know what i am made of, sometimes it is difficult to know what i am made for specifically. in a general sense, i am made to help people in some fashion. as i discussed in my week ten qqc, i wanted to help the homeless, and this translates to helping anybody in need. it is a central part of community and belonging for people to give back to those around them. over the past ten years, i have thought the way i want to help people is through medicine, through healing children that have been hurt and need medical help to be children again. yet, since being at notre dame i have found a new way to help people through research. i am in no rush to make the decision between the career choices, but i know whichever i choose will be to serve those around me with the education i receive. the path to reach this goal will be completed through my education at notre dame and after my undergraduate experience. my plan is to complete my degree in neuroscience and behavioral studies and proceed onto medical school. after medical school i hope to specialize in pediatric orthopedic surgery, it is a specialty that can change the trajectory of a child’s life who lives in pain. this will give me a sense of connectedness to the community that peter palmer discusses in week 11 in my professional life, but i don’t believe changing the world is only done in jobs. it is important to keep helping through volunteering or just helping a friend, i think devoting time to a group or one person can be the right steps to changing the world. although i believe that people are consistently changing, it is important to remember who we are in each stage of our lives. in week five i discuss how there are multiple factors that shape a person and this idea of who we were and who we are now is a significant factor. where we start allows for growth in the direction we want, it allows us to focus on our values and become that person. accordingly, throughout our lives evaluating who we are in the present allows for a redirection in the path we want to take if we aren’t currently on it. right now, i am a person who is made of determination to reach my goals, while still finding a way to help those around me in any capacity. the complicated life of a first year brazilian notre dame student the complicated life of a first year brazilian notre dame student i believe i forge life-giving relationships by being completely honest life giving relationships are essential in anyone's life and they are what most people try to make over time. i believe this as the most important part in any relationship is to be open and honest with the other party. “in order for connections to happen we need to allow ourselves to be seen.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) this quote demonstrates the point that the only way to forge true relationships is through opening. here at notre dame i've been trying to be completely open in all of my relationships and follow dr. brown's advice and insight. vulnerability permits you to connect in meaningful ways and express your emotions more vividly. courage is essential to face your fears and explore deeper connections that are not in your comfort zone. these are both key areas of honesty and there is no real relationship without these. in my journey to build life giving relationships i have learnt that there is no easy way to do it. “because i love you i text i can’t live without you.” (“because i love you whiskey” by onelove moreau fye week four) this quote shows the gravity of life giving relationships and how intense these relationships are. i have come to realize that honesty is the only way to form these relationships as without it there is no way to build a real connection at any level. over my time here at notre dame even though it has not been very long i think that i have started on the path of building these relationships. this belief of mine has not been challenged since the start. for me honesty has always been an essential part of any relationship. even before coming to notre dame i have always followed this idea. over my time here my actions have changed so that i can be able to build these relationships. here at notre dame my journey to build life giving relationships will continue following the principle of complete honesty. i believe that i grow by meeting new people in every new person i meet i believe i learn something new and grow as a result. i noticed this when i started notre dame. over my time here i have learned new things from all of the people i meet. this is even more evident during my classes. for example in my moreau class i have learned to open myself more and be more honest about my emotions. “you’ve left family and friends to form new relationships and create a new home here at notre dame” (“the role of faith in our story” by campus ministry moreau fye week three) as fr. pete states all of us students have left our families and friends. although i have left them i have come to realize that i have only done this temporarily. by leaving i had to sacrifice friendship and leave my family behind but now i have made hundreds of new friends. by going to new places i am able to build new friendships and meet new people. “meet father tom, vector biology professor. he's also at the helm of curing the disease of elephantiasis in haiti.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education”by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) the example of fr. tom going to haiti is a great example of visiting new places, meeting new people and doing good things at the same time. he is helping with a very serious disease and by doing so went to an underdeveloped country to do this. going to haiti must have been a great experience and one i hope to do someday. meeting new people during his journey to help others and get influenced by them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 being from brazil i have experienced more than the average american student. in a place that i love so much but is filled with violence, corruption and crime. during the moreau class, writing the poem reminded me of all the good and bad things about my home. the poem showed me how this transition of culture and how i have changed since i left. this positive change can be attributed to the connections i have made here and the people i have met. i believe that my purpose is to change into a better version of myself here at notre dame i have decided that i want to work on myself and improve myself. this has guided me as over my time in highschool i had several flaws that i wanted to change in myself. “you have to surrender to something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself. you have to conquer the desire to get what you want.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?”by david brooks moreau fye week two) this quote shows in my opinion some steps that i should take to get better and grow as a person. i also need to learn how to conquer my desires and this change would be very beneficial to me. by doing this i would not only grow as a person but as a student, employee and friend. i used to have a problem of being very one sided and not looking at the bigger picture; this left me not understanding certain problems. “how impressionable and vulnerable are we are in the face of a story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) when i was doing the activity for this week the idea of the story really called out to me. this is because i used to look at only my opinion in any argument or dispute. here at notre dame i will do my best to look at the whole story and not just my side. this also resonates with the idea of honesty as usually one side of the story is extremely biased and the views are distorted to fit the idea that is being talked about. sio going forward i will look at the bigger picture and not just one side of the story. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story all of the answers are yet to come i believe that i am good enough. for the entirety of my life, i have felt like i was not good enough either as a friend, daughter, sister, student, or person as a whole. i felt like i was never going to be the person that people chose or looked up to. i always thought i was alone with this idea because everyone around me looks so confident, but the reality is most people feel this way too. coming to notre dame made me realize that many people here have the same insecurities; they don’t feel as smart as their peers or they think that they are falling behind. even with regards to finding friends, i have met so many people who felt like no one would like them here and they would spend all their time alone, but after coming here i see that that is so far from true. brené brown said in her tedtalk that everyone thinks at one point “‘i'm not blank enough. i'm not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, promoted enough.’ the thing that underpinned this was excruciating vulnerability. this idea of, in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). notre dame made me realize that i am good enough, but also that being good enough does not mean you do not have room for growth. i have flaws and i have ways that i could be better. but, it is with these acknowledgements that i am able to find my place in the world and find my people that are made for me. i believe that it is possible to find the balance in life. one of my biggest challenges is balancing a social life and a work life. there are times when my friends do not see me for days because i am busy and focused, but other times where i neglect all of my work and responsibilities to spend time with my friends and have fun. notre dame definitely taught me how to handle the “work hard, play hard” environment. even the dorm atmosphere has taught me how to utilize my time wisely and multitask in order to combine the social and academic lives. for example, my friends have started to deem certain nights “cookie and study nights” where we bake cookies and get our work done for hours late at night. at home, things like this were more difficult because my home and school lives and mentalities were separated, but now they are all combined. this reminds me of the resume or eulogy analogy where you could either live for your professional reputation or your social character. (“should you live for your résumé… or for your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). when watching this talk i feared that i was focusing too much on my résumé, but now i can see myself learning how to find the balance and feel fulfilled in both aspects of my life. i believe that i have more faith than i realized. as a young child i was dragged to church every sunday for the 9 am mass to be followed by ccd, and every sunday i complained, tried to negotiate, and inevitably went in a terrible mood. even praying before meals in restaurants made me feel uncomfortable and weird, making it something for me to dread. when i first decided to come here the very first thing my dad told me was to get involved in the faith while i was here. unsurprisingly i was not planning to do that, but after the first weekend everything changed. now faith is normal and something that i can choose to participate in. for once i am listening to sermons and gospels that actually make sense to me and relate to me. and for once i feel like everyone i am surrounded with also chose to be there and want to have something to believe in. the faith on this campus is truly exceptional; from the pure beauty of the chapel to the serenity of the grotto to the comfort of the chapel in my hall. in “faith brings light to a dark world”, it stated, “god can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of god, every joy and sorrow can become a prayer. faith, hope, and love adjust the lighting of our life so that we look beyond ourselves to see god.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). this statement is precisely what happened to me. i did not see god from the church at home or from my daily life as a child, but now, being here, i finally see god and i see the amazing community that his teaching has created. i feel the faith from my friends, professors, and daily experiences, which is the biggest unexpected blessing i have found here so far. i believe that a toxic relationship does not mean someone is a bad person, they just simply are not the people for you. throughout my life i have lost plenty of friends and have felt like there was something wrong with me. why do they keep leaving? what did i do wrong this time? even though i have since realized that the friendship was not healthy, it doesn’t change the pain that i felt when i lost someone who once meant the world to me. however, i now recognize that there are some people who are just not meant for each other. the “because i love you, double whiskey” video was incredibly empowering for me because the statements of the people doing things that hurt them simply because they loved another person made me imagine my past (and partially my present) when i minimized myself or compromised my wants and needs to appease another. for example, one of the quotes said “because i love you, you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected” (“because i love you, double whiskey” moreau fye week four). this hurts to hear because no one deserves to be treated poorly. also, when i first watched this video, i thought how could someone be that manipulative. however, i somewhat felt sympathy for the fact that someone could be so miserable in their own lives that they would want someone else to suffer. as hard as it is, that is not a sign that they are a bad person, that is a sign that they are in a bad place. maybe all they need is a new group of friends or a fresh start. this might be why i have seen past “toxic” friends thrive with a new group of friends because while toxic relationships need to end or change, that does not mean anyone needs to be blamed or that anyone is a bad person for being who they are. i believe that i will one day learn to ignore the fear. everyone in this world is controlled by fear. i personally am controlled by fear of rejection and of being a disappointment and of being alone. for so long i have convinced myself that i can just live with the fear and try to coexist with it, but that is not really what i should do. my fear of rejection was so strong that i applied to more “super-safety” colleges and only one “reach” college because i could not handle getting rejected. my fear of being a disappointment has controlled me so much that i let others push me down because i am too afraid of saying something people may not approve of. my fear of being alone forced me to latch onto toxic people because i cannot physically be alone and feel unwanted from my peers. even though to date the fear has not overtaken me, that does not mean it never will. the truth is “fear is false evidence of things appearing real” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). essentially, fear is not real; it is just a trick our brains play on us to self-sabotage. there are still many fears in life, including the fear of the future and of the unknown, but i can only hope that one day my future self will be strong enough to ignore the fear. to a degree, the very fact that i moved half-way across the country to attend this university away from home is an example of me fighting the fear. the very fact that i have introduced myself as my authentic self is me pushing past my fear of unacceptance. while i cannot truly say that at this moment i think that i can do everything without hesitation, i do believe that the potential is there. i believe that my past is not worth regretting. i have had a rough childhood. from eating disorders to multiple therapists to narcissistic family members, i have accepted that even though it was hard, i made it through. george ella lyon’s poem “where i’m from'' included descriptions of all the factors that created her, and all of it seemed so dreamlike. she writes, “i am from the dirt under the back porch” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). such a statement symbolizes the freedom and ability to explore that children have and all adults wish they could experience again. but, when i thought about where i am from, all i could think of were the negatives. i thought of the tears and the fear and the pain. even moreso, since being at the university of notre dame i have met plenty of other people who have come from difficult backgrounds. however, there comes a point when i have to accept that complaining about the past and wishing for a different upbringing does not help me. the past is done. to a certain extent, i do not even know who i would be today if my past was even slightly different. now that i have made it so far and have accomplished so many goals, i no longer see the point of regretting what could have been, and instead want to focus on what can be and what will be. the burden of the past only prohibits me. hence, i believe that moving forward mentally will only benefit me and allow me to do what i came here and what i was born to do. lastly, i believe that i cannot allow myself to be marginalized and faded into the background. typically, people and larger groups are downgraded and oversimplified because someone decided to give them a label and a single story. chimamanda ngozi adichie once said, “show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). this statement made me angry. i do not want to be just one thing. i do not want to be grouped in with a bunch of people based on the description given to me by another. i want to be my own person. as much as i may think this, i can only imagine how other people feel about this too. an opportunity coming to college is that people are allowed to make a new identity for themselves, which is a rare opportunity that has so many possibilities, but that also means people are able to judge you for the first time all over again. what if i make a bad impression? what if i do not know who i am or who i want to be? how can i explain who i am and how i came to be? all of these things are terrifying because too many times have people been judged and labeled falsely. this concept i in turn translated into the way that i met new people over the first weekend because i did not want to write people off just because of the way they look, the clothes they wear, or the things they eat. i wanted to see the real them. essentially, i just hope that if i could manage to look for the realness in others, maybe they would look for the realness in me. moreau fye integration my notre dame and moreau experience: changing perceptions over the past thirteen weeks, i have embarked on a journey of self-discovery through discussion and readings for our moreau first year experience class. although it may sound cliché, self-reflection was something i had never truly attempted before moreau. each week challenged me to examine my mindset and lifestyle while gaining a deeper understanding of my thoughts, emotions, and community. the first half of the semester helped me identify and develop the core beliefs that constitute who i am as a person. the latter half of the semester focused my reflection on my perceptions of the world around me and how i am involved in my community. not only did this involve the way i view things around me, but also how i respond, or should be responding, to them. my view and response to what occurs in my community is crucial for my development at notre dame, but also beyond my collegiate career. the resources provided by our moreau class have helped me examine these aspects of my life each week. first, week nine helped me reflect on impostor syndrome and how it has been present in my life, even if i am not willing to admit it. in one of the provided articles for week nine, julia hogan discusses the consequences of basing our actions on other people’s expectations for us. this can have adverse effects on our success and requires careful consideration. she writes, “instead of asking, ‘what should i do?’ or ‘what would my friend/parent/significant other expect me to do?’, ask yourself, ‘what do i want to do?’ and ‘what do i think is best?’” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week nine). this quote exemplifies how comparing ourselves to what others think of us has negative effects on our mindset and image. i was able to relate this quote to a ted talk video regarding impostor syndrome also from week nine. after watching the video, i realized that i suffer from all the same things described and have felt the same way since middle school. i would feel as if i was never good enough and needed to always improve. according to my brain, i could never measure up to what others perceived me to be capable of. in school, i would find myself completing my work to gain the approval of others. i had created a reputation for myself of being “the smart kid,” so i always had to do well to impress my peers. i also wanted to live up to the expectations my parents had for me, but i always felt as if i was living in my sister’s shadow because she was always smarter than me. the first two questions in the passage i quoted were legitimate thoughts in my head that guided my decisions. my college decision was the first major decision in my life that made sense for me without any advice or guidance from others. it gave me a level of confidence in myself that i have never felt before and i have been trying to carry this feeling with me. week nine helped me identify areas of my mindset and decision making where i can improve by not trying to satisfy other people’s expectations of me. next, week ten called for me to reflect on what community means to me and how i can work to benefit the communities i am a member of. when discussing issues in our community, fr. john jenkins says, “we cannot pretend to stand outside this. we are woven into it” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkinsmoreau fye week ten). discussing social injustice within the country, jenkins is trying to make it clear that we cannot just stand on the sidelines. we are inherently members of a community much larger than us, and it is our duty to work for the benefit of this community. the most basic aspect of community in my life is my closest circle of friends and family. another example of a community i am involved in would be my dorm. i am also a member of the notre dame community as an entire student body and school. even in the broadest sense possible, i am a part of the community of american citizens, and the community of all mankind. realizing that i am involved in so many communities also brought to my attention how i must prioritize their well-being. by simply acting morally, i believe that it can benefit my entire community. one controversial topic within my communities is racism and racial relations. understanding racial relations and tension is crucial in doing work that will benefit society. therefore, if i wish to be a positive member of my communities, i am obligated to understand such topics. accepting and embracing diversity is what can enhance a community. personally, i will admit that i have not done a great job of this. it is not that i have been opposed to learning about such topics, i just have not put in the effort to do so. i don’t hold my education responsible for this even if it could have been better, but i hold myself responsible for not becoming involved. week ten directed my focus towards improving and maintaining my communities through being able to understand and address difficult topics like racism and racial tension. furthermore, week eleven of the moreau first year experience once again examined the topic of community and how encouraging things such as diversity can enhance the well-being of my community. in his talk, professor agustin fuentes says, “understanding the landscape of the united states is absolutely central to understanding who we are as students, who we are as scholars, who we are as members of the notre dame community” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentesmoreau fye week eleven). fuentes recognizes the acceptance of diversity to be an important aspect of community that can enhance relationships and overall production. another idea that i recall standing out to me was the statement that community is not a goal but a gift. admittedly, i have viewed community as something that we should try to achieve. it never truly occurred to me that community is something we are freely offered. another important point from the reading was how we achieve a better connection to our community, such as through self-reflection. i have never really taken the time for self-reflection because i never thought that my community would be reliant upon my personal growth. i have now found areas where i can grow to improve myself and therefore my community. also, community requires a sort of leadership. this leadership comes in the form of maintaining a trustworthy space where people are safe to create relationships and grow. by embracing community, i have the responsibility to reflect and protect the sacred space that a community is. it is also important to remind myself that community is not solely reliant on me, but each individual member. the discussion surrounding week eleven helped further my understanding of community from week ten and directed me to pieces of my view on community that need realignment. finally, week twelve reverted my reflection back to what is most important: my spirituality and relationship with god. a quotation that stood out to me from this reflection was when c.s. lewis writes that our relationship with god “relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewismoreau fye week twelve). the “troughs” of life lewis references prove to be a test of faith, but also a revelation of god’s love. in instances of hardship in my life, whether it be the illness of a family member or internal struggles, i have found that i do not turn to god. i have always just thought that i need to deal with problems myself. i have come to realize that even though god is all powerful and on a different level than humans, he can still act like a friend. for much of my life, this is something i failed to understand. moving forward, i need to do a better job of bringing my problems to god and putting my faith in him that they will be resolved. i also need to change my view on struggles because if god has allowed them in my life, then he knows i can handle them, and he is willing to help. i appreciated week twelve’s return to reflection regarding god because that is one of the main reasons i chose to attend notre dame. i am searching to better understand my relationship with god and these materials showed me how god is present in my life. the second half of our moreau class has opened me to be more perceptive of the world around me. week nine challenged me to examine how i have altered my life to meet the expectations of those around me and how i can move forward to change this habit. weeks ten and eleven both focused on how a membership in community holds me responsible to protect my community and foster growth by addressing controversy. lastly, week twelve aimed my reflection towards how i view my relationship with god and ways i can alter my thought process to deepen my spirituality. overall, i am appreciative of my experience and reflection in moreau. each week of moreau challenged me to reflect on the man i have been and the ways in which i can change to better myself as i continue to grow at notre dame. professor anthony polotto moreau first year experience 14 october 2021 the discernment of beliefs in the matter of just two months, i have managed to understand so much about myself. being alone, separated from family, the ability to make decisive choices rested on my hands. with so much unrestricted freedom, i had to learn to grapple between managing time for both social and educational life. while it’s only been two months, my entrance into this self-driven school community has inspired me and helped me develop a few foundational beliefs. as an undergraduate student, i believe that i pursue truth by gathering the courage to venture into the zones of my personal vulnerability. “vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown – moreau fye week one).” while being vulnerable can be seen as an agonizing and shameful experience, it always results with the transmittance of one’s self-truth and the release of one’s identity. vulnerability will expose every one of their weaknesses, but in turn will generate the birthplace of several new, beautiful characteristics, which define and shape the essence of who one is. as i reflect on this concept of vulnerability, i turn to my saddened experience of receiving a low score on my first chemistry quiz. while others seemed to grasp the concepts at a fast pace, i fell behind, and never tried to consult for help, due to my fear of my friends’ thoughts. however, i exposed my vulnerable state in chemistry by seeking tutoring through office hours. this eventual concrete step that i took allowed me to generate better results and perform better on my quizzes. cultivating the growth of one’s authentic self is a difficult task. authenticity, especially regarding oneself, is displaying every perspective of that individual. i believe that i can grow as my most authentic self by also attending to my struggles and weaknesses. “and soloveitchik argued that these two sides of our nature are at war with each other. we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two).” david brooks introduces the concept of adam i and adam ii life. an individual who follows the adam i life generally attempts to please people, seek to reinforce their strengths whereas an individual who follows the adam ii life accepts the challenges presented by their vulnerabilities. when an individual practices the adam i life, they are usually in battle with their consciousness – knowing that they should live the adam ii life, but dwells on the adam i life. this semester, i encouraged myself to understand and remind myself of my struggles. instead of repressing them, i took on the courage to fight them, and from this experience, i gained a new depth of understanding of my own character. i believe that through faith, i can gain the hope and trust from god, which sustains me. “believing in god means believing in a greater good, a love so great that it is capable of purifying even the most unthinkable tribulations. faith brings us together. through god’s love, we are able to love one another deeper (“student reflections on faith” by nyah – moreau fye week three).” faith is a source of nourishment for the heart and soul. faith is not built upon a foundation of logic, but is cemented in a being’s core, guided, and instructed by god. for me, faith has always been a stronghold in my life. when the stress of school builds up, turning to god has always provided me the answer to my distress. coming to notre dame, my first mission was to become an altar server at the basilica. i managed to achieve this and have served a few times on the altar of the basilica. helping as a liturgical minister has given me the ability to grow in my faith during my first semester. “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage. nobody can be you the way you can be you (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five).” an individual’s authenticity is unique, because it is this authenticity that allows one to form their personal narrative. god has crafted every individual in a special way, as the struggles and talents each person possesses make them more personal and individualized. thus, by trusting in god and the way god has made us, we can be able to understand ourselves more and utilize the power of our individuality to spark changes in the world. through faith in god and trusting in the authenticity he has endowed on me, i can be able to sustain myself in a pleasant way, knowing that the creator has created me uniquely to serve the world. they say that it is during college that you make your life-long friends. coming to college, i was positive to build friendships not based on personal necessity but for a mutual respect and dignity for each person in the relationship. i believe that i can create meaningful relationships by finding those who can mutually love each other. “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people…. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). a friendship is not a form of a beneficiary relationship for one sole individual but rather it is a commitment to serve each other with the respect and dignity each human being deserves. during my first weeks of college, i attempted to discover those friendships of utility. a friendship of utility is characterized by the understanding of one’s friends’ character and being hopeful to uplift each other’s dreams and goals in the friendship. as the weeks have gone, i believe i have found a small number of people who admire me for who i am and in turn i admire them for who they are. this mutual admiration for each other’s character is what composes my belief of a meaningful relationship. a community is the pivotal point of stories. the colling point of ideas, concepts, themes, and understandings. thus, i believe that my community should foster the appraisal of multiple stories.  “the real problem is in our system of producing shared stories. if a country can’t tell narratives in which everybody finds an honorable place, then righteous rage will drive people toward tribal narratives that tear it apart (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks – moreau fye week 7).” the presence of a single story on a concept instigates the beginnings of stereotypes, as there is only one story to answer the several unanswered questions. a single story is dangerous. it forms from the negligence to be open minded. it forms from the innate belief to not eliminate stereotypes. in a college campus, as the community acknowledges each other’s stories, our minds will be enhanced with a special type of education. the education of experience. as people share their experiences, especially experiences of the lesser known, the community can work to eliminate biases. the presence of more stories provides for the various perspectives on a single topic. i strive to listen to others, and their unique stories. this will allow me to understand topics i am not aware about, but also love my fellow classmates for their experiences. as i continue with my semester and eventually my four years, i hope to possibly strengthen these beliefs or even rewrite some of these beliefs. the growth one experiences through their interactions with others is remarkable. i hope to discover myself, my passions, my talents, my purpose, and even my weaknesses as i discern my personal beliefs as an individual. integration one—donohoe donohoe 1 mr. nguyen moreau fye 14 october 2021 “spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe”: self-sacrificing love as a guide for the human experience root beliefs (form best as a collective story): i believe that i create lifelong friendships through extensive emotional effort alongside a need to be present. i believe that i am influenced the most by unexpected sources. i believe that my ultimate purpose is to reach agape love in my relationships. continuing my catholic education at notre dame following a jesuit high school experience that focused on cura personalis (the care for the whole person) and living as a man for and with others, i arrived at notre dame with a deep understanding of the possibilities in which a faith-centered institution may shape me as a human being but without a firm grasp on what form these changes may take or how they would influence the lives of myself and those around me. human growth stems from experience—human interaction, success, failure. through aiming to not only listen to others when they share their life experiences but truly make them feel heard, acknowledged, and accepted, i believe that i forge life-giving friendships through making a genuine effort with every person i encounter, understanding and responding to their shared donohoe 2 thoughts, and relinquishing deep stories and experiences of my own, in hopes of a shared bond leading to mutual growth and understanding. while arriving to college thousands of miles away from home, only knowing a few kids from my high school or neighboring schools, can create a mental stigma to race into quick friendships and relationships to rapidly fill the gap once held by former peers and friends from home, i believe cultivating true friendships requires dedication and a willingness to break past social barriers, arriving at the core of other’s personalities and character. speaking on notre dame and its formation and foundation, father kevin grove shared that “[e]ducation leads us out of the darkness of ignorance and even sometimes sin, first into society, as people committed to integrity and to each other. and then into the final hope of a life together as one, in heaven” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove c.s.c. moreau fye week five). at the core of our notre dame education and experience exists human connection and spiritual contemplation. forming true connections unequivocally requires equal effort as any other component of our notre dame experience, from academics to sports and extracurriculars: “[c]onnection is why we’re here; it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives; this is what it’s all about.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this opening, first week concept of forming strong bonds with others existing as the root of our existence serves as a focal point for the entire moreau course, and notre dame’s mission as a whole. i believe that humans are influenced the most by unexpected sources—those by some external circumstances that arrive in our lives and change our outlook and idea of truth and belonging; my roommate quickly became that first source promoting an ontological change in my understanding of shaping my narrative and self-worth. notre dame promotes the week five-seven missions of “identifying narratives,” “identifying influences,” and “influencing https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=emb_logo donohoe 3 perspectives” before we even arrive on campus by pairing us with a random roommate. forming relationships can be prematurely tarnished through implicit bias, “[setting] people up to overgeneralize” (“how to think about 'implicit bias'” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreu fye week seven). i made the mistake of assuming i would lack many commonalities with my roommate, as we grew up in vastly different countries on opposite ends of the earth. regardless of experiences (granted we do have many interests in common), our unique perspectives further contribute to mutual growth far more than any overlaps. recently my ra asked me “what was the deepest conversation i ever had with another person?” while i can think of others i’ve shared with family members, in the moment the first conversation that popped into my head was shared between myself and my roommate the first night we met; he showcased how “no one else sees the world as you do” (“where i'm from, a poem by george ella lyon, writer and teacher” by george ella lyon moreu fye week six). we had alone time to discuss questions to break the ice, and we ended on the following topic: what influential figures in our lives shaped our lives so far, and how did we arrive at nd. i talked about my parents, brother, friends, mentors, and other people in my life. i went first and gave a decent effort into my answer but omitted some parts where i could have dove deeper into their character and influence; my roommate, deep in thought of his answer, focused on one person in his life, and her lasting message to him before he set off for college. for context, my roommate arrived here from nepal, living in a children’s home, and had only been to the u.s. once prior after his 8th grade year after winning an essay contest to do a month in u.s. schooling. his influential figure that shaped his framework and self-knowledge before arriving to nd was the founder of his children’s home, maggie. my roommate, explaining her story, shared the following: had his parents raised him, he would have grown up without education, been married https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html donohoe 4 off at a young age, worked manual labor his whole life, had kids, and if he worked super hard, he would be able to afford education for his child within his area—but an extensive or upper level education. the next generation, his child would grow up, get married, have kids, and if the child worked super hard, his grandchild would be able to receive education at a higher level school in his region. flash forward to the third generation, if his grandchild worked incredibly hard in his life, as well as received a bit of luck as none of this was guaranteed, then he would be able to send his child to kathmandu, the capital to study. the following generation, already a 100 years in the future, would follow his great grandchild, who if he worked super hard in his life and prospered, would be able to send his child abroad to the u.s. to study at a college, and finally, in the fifth generation, my roommate’s great great grandkid, over a hundred years in the future, if he/she worked super hard would be able to grow up, get married, have a child, and send him/her to any top college in the u.s. (if they worked super hard). the point maggie made was that whenever my roommate is feeling out of place, unworthy of being here, or overall disheartened, he knows deep inside that because of his doing he changed the course of the lives of the next five generations of his family, and changed the lives of all those that he would interact with alongside those impacted by his future children. that moment not only revealed the care and compassion of my roommate and his willingness to share his life experiences in hopes of sharing advice and guidance but also pinpointed just how notre dame would uniquely influence my life: by providing me with the opportunity to connect with those across the nation and the world with fundamentally different worldviews and experiences that also are wishing to grow. week four’s topic of “searching for life-giving relationships” included the following quote on friendship: “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ donohoe 5 t. taylor moreau fye week four). stating that we should always put an effort into forming connections regardless of the person, i wholeheartedly believed (and continue to believe) that effort should be yielded in every human interaction, yet i am still witnessing how my notre dame experience would build upon my friendships. at notre dame, we are called “to live in a way internally that honors god, creation, and our possibilities” (“david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two), and honoring these fundamental influences in our lives means modeling our relationships after the agape (a focal point of my ggl course lessons and my high school kairos talk), self-sacrificing love that god has for humanity. i believe that reaching agape love in our relationships is the ultimate goal— our ultimate purpose; furthermore, i believe the journey to reaching agape reveals the communities we join or abandon, the truth we pursue or question, and the people we fully love or shun away as time progresses forward. early in week three, i disagreed with part of the following quote: “spiritual life is not a private and secret place in our hearts… spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). however, as i continue the moreau course and overall notre dame journey, i continue to witness the ways that sharing our understanding of faith and journeys benefits those that are willing to converse. while i do believe that there are times when practicing faith in private can strengthen oneself, the overall mission of our spiritual journey should undoubtedly include others to shape our beliefs, narrative, and overall life perspective. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau moreau integration 2 11/27/2021 moreau fye integration 2 growing in my nd journey through my experiences and growth in my notre dame experience, i believe that i have become more fully myself. i remember writing my application essays in which i talked about this moreau class specifically. i wrote about how i wanted to go to a school where i would not only be challenged to be the best student i could be but also to be the best person i could be. in reality i did not know much about this class however my sister told me the general idea. little did i know how accurate my predictions about this class would be. each class has presented great opportunities to ponder and discuss important concepts and questions in our society. i truly feel as if i have grown in my capabilities to discuss my feelings and experiences with others. i have only been treated with love and respect in my group discussions through this class and have grown closer to many people in that classroom. one of the most memorable discussions was during the visit to the snite museum. my initial reaction to seeing the art piece was the feeling of being overwhelmed and a little intimidated. the fact that there were no correct initial predictions as to what the artist was aiming to display through this piece has shown me that everyone will always have their own ideas and viewpoints on any topic given to them. it is very hard to truly communicate everything that is on your mind and therefore it is hard to fully express yourself to the fullest degree. it was almost shocking to find out that the topic was about racial prejudice and fighting against it. the fact that everyone in the room had thoughtful and meaningful ideas such as topics regarding the afterlife showed me that even if the true message is not completely understood, thinking critically about something can bring about many different conversations that can be important. i am thankful for the caring environment that the moreau fye has created because i am so used to people being so hateful and toxic when discussing anything remotely controversial. this type of experience is captured in the following quote, “each side has never been more eager yet more unable to dominate the other. both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). i will aim to listen to more people's ideas and opinions and not try to dominate just for the sake of being correct because there is usually some sense in where these ideas come from. i will continue to stay humble and accept that i can be ignorant and incorrect. everyone is bound to have prejudices and i hope to understand where people are coming from in discussions about important concepts. before coming to notre dame, i was used to being a part of a very small community in which everyone is aware of everyone’s business. i was expecting to come to college and everyone not minding anyone's business but i was very wrong. there is still so much gossip and hate spread around to put others down. i was surprised to meet many people with huge egos. in the first couple months i was already struggling with knowing my place here and it did not help https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104210 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104210 to see these people putting up a front and acting like they are in control of everything. i had the mindset described in the following quote, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan, grotto moreau fye week 9) over time i have learned to stop comparing myself to others because there will always be somebody more talented and skilled in certain areas because no one can be good at everything. i know i will never be perfect and should not be upset about that, i should stop being so hard on myself and be happy when i put in effort. building deeper connections with people who are not douchebags has increased in importance greatly. i was used to being forced to be friends with certain people because of how small my class was, however now i can choose anyone i want to be around. i will actively avoid those people who have the mindset that they are better than others. my own physical and mental health has also increased in importance since coming here. at the start of the year i barely got any sleep and was not living a healthy lifestyle while eating dining hall food with little nutritional value. once i was able to have a work routine and find more free time, i was able to start getting more sleep and even start working out a little. as i continue to get better study and work habits, i plan to join an engineering club which i believe will be a valuable experience for my future. regarding the dining hall food, i have learned ways to combine different foods in the dining hall to not only taste better but to be healthier. the start of the school year was very academically challenging. it seemed that i was the only one feeling this way because not many people around me would talk about their struggles. i was thinking that everyone here was just naturally smarter and more talented than i was. later on i realized that everyone struggled in their own ways. i also realized how many opportunities i had to seek help such as tutors and office hours. this relates to the idea in week 12 where it is always better to seek guidance from people better than you instead of trying to do everything yourself, “while anyone can navigate his own path without formal or substantial instruction in the faith, as was true of moreau’s parents, some leaders, lay, religious, and clergy must be capable of articulating and teaching the message.” (“holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week 12). ever since i signed up for small group tutoring for two of my classes and started attending office hours more often, i have felt much more comfortable in understanding concepts in class. i will continue to take advantage of both of these and actively seek out more ways to get help in classes when i need it. i know another way i could get help is to seek out fellow classmates to organize study groups. i plan to do this more often next semester. something that was once ambiguous to me was how people had enough free time to do clubs and schooling. i was really struggling balancing work with my normal day to day life. through this struggle and suffering i was able to push myself to build better work habits. i have found that i am able to convert struggle and suffering into success in most cases through perseverance. this idea relates to the following quote, “suffering lets our ‘hearts break open’ enough to hold both a vision of hope and the reality of resistance without tightening like a fist.” https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104200 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104200 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465/download?download_frd=1 (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). by seeking out the help mentioned in the previous paragraph, i have found more free time for myself. i plan to use this extra time to join clubs. next semester i will make sure to participate in a couple clubs to see which one suits me best. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104233 integration #2 pierpoint 1 professor retartha moreau 3 december 2021 how can our responses to hardships shape our lives? life is a combination of highs and lows, happiness and sadness, exuberance and pain, but our responses to these experiences prove to be most important in determining our character. once in a while, it is important to reflect on past experiences and how we have responded to the situation, how that response led to the specific outcome, and how we could have changed or improved our response knowing the current knowledge. furthermore, with time, certain aspects of life become more clear while others still remain vague and confusing; our beliefs change and we place importance on different facets therefore it is beneficial to self-assess what remains important, and what no longer adds significance to our lives. with age and maturation, i have learned that in order to tangibly see self growth and development, all of the aforementioned assessments can be taken in order to better understand myself and how to become the best version of myself for myself and for others. during my first semester at notre dame, i began to reflect on what was important to me during high school and how that has changed or remained the same at nd. in high school, my mental health was not prioritized but rather my academics and extracurricular activities were placed above my happiness, and consequently, i struggled to find what was important to me. i began to link my self-worth with academic/extracurricular success. however, through reflection and personal growth, i now understand that my prior thought processing was toxic and i should have let go of my personal expectations in order to live a more genuine and liberated life. after pierpoint 2 reading “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit,” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) it reminded me that my life is mine to live and i should not be searching for approval or for directionality on how to live life to the fullest. how can i let go of others and my “perfect” expectations: this became a recurring question that i have asked myself this semester. i am now solidifying my belief that the people around me should not have such a momentous impact on my self assurance but rather it is up to me to determine my path in life and how i want to live it. my expectations for myself are still high, but i will not let myself crumble if i do not achieve them to the extent that i desired, and this outcome will allow my mental health to suffer less. this became an important perception as i realize that when i approach new challenges, new opportunities, and new experiences, i will accept them with open arms, but i refuse to allow others opinions to supersede how i want to live my life and this is how i can find what is valuable for my life. as a result of my notre dame journey thus far, i have received clarity in regards to my brokenness and in encountering hope in otherwise dim situations. when i watched the video highlighting the kintsugi workshop that kirsten helgeson holds for the women in her community (women find healing through kintsugi by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week 10), i really resonated with her attempts to help those struggling with accepting brokenness. i, like many other people, tend to push my feelings below the surface so i don’t have to face them or feel my feelings of anxiety, sadness, pain, even though these are normal human emotions. i have greatly improved in feeling my feelings and accepting them, but i still feel shameful when i have these emotions. the message i took away from her workshop is that i am broken, my heart can be broken, but these fractures allow me to grow and expand as a genuine person. i should not have to feel shame for the feelings that reside deep within me, but rather i can accept the https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106256 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106256 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau pierpoint 3 feelings, accept the loss, and surrender the turmoil. this clarity will allow me to begin a life that is filled not with regrets, but with genuinity. furthermore, when these difficult times arise, it is almost laborious to find hope, but with hope in god, we can try to have hope that his path for us will lead us towards satisfaction and happiness. this is a belief that goes back and forth between clarity and ambiguity; when everything seems wrong, i find myself searching for hope that doesn’t seem to be there, but other times my search for hope proves successful and i can remain optimistic. this can be related to “the screwtape letters” (chapter 8 of “the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12) as a better way to approach hardships is reconsidering the strenuous periods in my life as a stepping stone towards something greater that can help me to find hope. present struggles are temporary and if we can rethink the grueling periods in our life, we can have a closer relationship to god. before notre dame, i never would have thought this way as i thought my struggles were never ending and i would never escape the moment of pain, but now i have a deeper comprehension that everything is temporary, even happiness and we must appreciate each moment for the role it plays in evolution. encountering community is an aspect that has increased in my time at notre dame. i have always known that finding community is a part of life that is so important: human connections give life and allow us to mature and appreciate all that life has to offer. however for many people, their community is just a small group of like-minded people and this environment doesn’t allow for much growth. from the video highlighting the importance of diversity, professor agustin fuentes said, “race differences are actually based not by biological differences, but social, historical, political, economic, and experiential contexts, and most importantly because of that, are changeable” (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). this has stuck with me because people’s inert racism is stemmed off https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189595?module_item_id=106352 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 pierpoint 4 of contextual evidence that has surrounded their upbringing not because of anything else. through my time at nd, i have better understood how people’s one-sided minds actually hinder their ability to form life-forging relationships and engage in a socially stimulating community. by putting aside my own beliefs and viewpoints of the world can aid my mission towards receiving the gift of community connectedness. it is impossible to fully encounter community when harsh viewpoints restrict the ability to form meaningful relationships with people who are different from you. i have encountered many instances in which people refuse to be friends with another person because their political beliefs differ or because their skin color is different from theirs. this is something that will always astound me as i could never base a relationship on something that surface level. i have learned that people who choose their relationships based on similarity are people who i do not want to surround myself with. diversity and life differences can make for the most fulfilling relationships and this is an important lesson that i have learned from my experience thus far at nd. because of notre dame, i have learned so much about who i am, who i want to become, and what i believe in. i have curated new beliefs and solidified others, but everything is subject to change, and this is something else i have learned. nothing is set in stone and my life will be filled with obstacles that could create speed bumps in the road and lead me on a different path, but that obstacle could lead me towards something bigger and greater than an easy path could provide. professor pruitt moreau fye 18 april 2022 moreau capstone integration – a new mission statement over the course of my first year of college, i have learned so much about who i am as a person and how i want to live my life. i have encountered many challenges and experiences that pushed me to step out of my comfort zone and into independent learning and thinking about my career goals, societal flaws, and deeper questions about my faith. i am so thankful to be in a community that truly facilitates lasting companionship. upon reflection, i can confidently say that i have a deeper understanding of how i can pursue a life well-lived, and i know that i have the support system to achieve this overarching and ever changing goal. my mission is to have a positive impact on the world through my work and interactions with others (week 13, developing a mission). in order to achieve my career goals, i must be comfortable with self-reflection, so i can clearly discern where i want to pursue my career and discover where my passions lie. in completing the “pause for reflection” activity sheet from the first week of moreau, i was able to identify that i need to work on mindfulness and efficiency in my work (“pause for reflection” activity sheet – moreau fye week 1). practicing this self-reflection was so important in increasing my success in school, and pushed me closer to achieving my goal of making a positive impact through my work. and, through self-reflection, i was able to identify what specific resources i want to use from notre dame to achieve my goals. a quote from week 4’s reading really stood out to me – “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!”(merulo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). it is important to remember that all of the difficult courses and errors we experience in discerning our future plans are worthwhile and ultimately shape who we are. furthermore, having someone to look up to is integral to my journey of finding passion and success in medicine. for example, reading about notre dame grad dr. conley and her mission to discover medicine for cancer was very inspiring to me. she used her degree in science along with her devotion to her faith in order to make a positive impact on so many lives (“domer dozen” – moreau fye week 2). similarly, my mom’s insight and guidance through the difficulties of medicine and the effort it requires to achieve your goals is so helpful to me (“week five discernment conversation activity” -moreau fye week 5). having someone that went through the medical school process to talk to about what i am looking to get out of the experience is so important to me. i am able to have honest conversations about how my values align with this career, and where i may face difficulties. in my profession, i hope to focus on solving broader healthcare disparities, similar to the “initiative to solve health and healthcare inequities” presentation at the msca symposium (mcsa symposium summaries – moreau fye week 12). my education here at notre dame has facilitated my courage to act upon pressing societal issues. through my faith, i want to help prevent suffering for people, and serve those who are struggling. this presentation was a wonderful outline for doing just that – building community partnerships while forwarding clinical innovations. the second element to my mission statement is to bring positivity to others, and form a sense of community in the environments i am in with strong values and an appreciation for life. relationships are so important in achieving happiness and fulfillment. it is so important to open our arms to unlikely friendships and shift our mindsets from “you” to “us” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye week 7). this insight encourages me to expand my circle, and embrace the people around me as a support system – especially here at notre dame, where difficult classes and greuling coursework are so much more manageable with strong camaraderie. on a broader scale, one of my values in life is helping those in need around me through service. it is necessary when doing service to open your arms to the friendships you can form with poeple, and what you can learn from them – “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friends without being open to friendship” (professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). this has proven so enriching to me when i volunteer at the catholic worker house. i have heard so many perspective-changing stories that have truly affected my life and shaped my mindset. moreover, an integral aspect of my mission is to facilitate acceptance in any community i am apart of. i hope that everyone’s differences can be celebrated and respected, so we can create a positive, welcoming, and safe environment for everyone to flourish and truly be themselves. social teachings of the catholic church and notre dame have emphasized that “jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god”(“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” – moreau fye week 10). an important step towards achieving this community of acceptance is learning to see issues from multiple perspectives, becoming the most informed version of yourself. it is easy, especially when in an environment of like-minded people, to lose sight of outside experiences and interpretations of pressing issues – falling into echo chambers (dr. paulo blaschko – moreau fye week 11). to combat this cycle, i make it a priority to converse with people of different backgrounds and walks of life, especially pertaining to political and social issues. and, with social media so tailored to perpetuating the political polarization of our country, i have been making sure to read from a wide variety of news sources when looking into current events. a final aspect to my mission statement is to achieve personal growth through my faith, mindset, mindfulness, and outlook on life. one of my favorite readings from this course was about the concept of memento mori – “to intentionally think about our own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun…” – moreau fye week 3). i have truly adopted this mindset, and have noticed that i have an increased appreciation for the present moments i am living in. i feel especially grateful during my walks to class, funny moments with friends, and during mass to name a few. and, another shift in mindset that has been beneficial to me while pursuing a life well-lived is from “why” to “what”. proposing questions with “what” allow us to see potential for growth rather than ruminating on the past, trapping us in cyclical thinking (“the right way to be introspective” – moreau fye week 6). i have used this many times following difficult exams in order to correct my study plan and perform better in the future. it has truly allowed me to move forward and avoid time wasted thinking about things i cannot change. this year has been a year of growth for me in all aspects of my life. i have been able to form a community and life in a new location, and am so blessed to have an amazing support system of friends and family. i look forward to pursuing this mission i have created – and to keep learning about how to live a life well-lived during my time at notre dame. i will miss our moreau discussions, and am grateful for what i have learned over the course of the year. integration one the roots of my tree throughout the first seven weeks of moreau, i believe that i have grown as a person, friend, and student. i have learned how to be compassionate for others and understand that everyone comes from different areas. the various perspectives during our in-class discussions have illustrated to me the wide range of opinions and perspectives on this campus. i’ve learned to listen and accept all perspectives, even if they contradict my own opinions. i have learned a lot about other people but i have also learned a great deal about myself. i have learned what values are truly important to me and my key beliefs. i have narrowed my values into seven core beliefs. i believe that i deserve to be loved. i sometimes struggle with a lack of self-confidence. i convince myself that i am not good enough and ask myself, “why should anyone love me”. i have learned through class discussions that we all have different flaws and insecurities. in her ted talk about vulnerability, dr. brown states, “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe they are worthy of love and belonging”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown-moreau fye week one). in the first week, dr. brown’s quote really stuck with me. i realized that being loved started with the self-belief that i deserve to be loved. for me, that started by accepting that i am not perfect. through class discussion, i realized that everyone has faults and flaws that they are insecure about too. i started to gain more self-confidence and now i can proudly say that i believe i deserve to be loved. i believe that i am a work in progress. this belief might be seen as a negative thing but i actually look at it as a positive. none of us are perfect but some of us try to pretend to be. in his ted talk, david brook’s stated, “there is a difference between your desired self and your actual self”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks-moreau fye week two). david brooks’s words made me think about the via character strengths survey that we https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102678 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 completed for week two as well. the survey told me that my signature strengths were curiosity, gratitude, and judgment. these were not the values i was expecting to be my strengths. i realized that those values accurately depicted my “actual self” but not my “desired self”. i strive to be a very outgoing, positive person, who brings happiness and laughter to everyone around me. i know that i am not that person yet. i am not where i want to be but i will strive to get there every day. i believe that god is guiding me on the right path. faith and god have always been a part of my life but i would have a tendency to sometimes question god in times of trouble. in his speech, father pete emphasizes, “each faith journey is unique...remind yourself that your journey is in the loving and sure hands of god”(“the role of faith in our journey” by fr. pete mccormick-moreau fye week 5). since arriving on the notre dame campus, faith has become a much bigger part of my life. i attend weekly mass and make routine trips to the grotto. father pete’s quote has helped me immensely, as well. with my newly strengthened relationship with god and father pete’s words in mind, in times of trouble, i try not to question god. i just trust he is guiding me exactly where i need to be. i believe that true friendship is hard to find and it should be cherished if it is established. in week four we learned about healthy relationships but also about unhealthy or toxic relationships. when reading about the characteristics of toxic relationships i applied the principles to my own life and realized that only a few of my relationships were truly healthy relationships. in olivia taylor’s article on toxic relationships, she states, “attention is one of the rarest forms of love”(“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor-moreau fye week 4). after reading this quote, i realized that many of my friendships are ruled by our phones. one of my friends will start looking at their phone instead of engaging in conversation. honestly, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102707 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102727 i find myself doing the same sometimes. if we are truly friends then the other person's company should be enough to entertain us. i also know that friendships can turn from slightly toxic to healthy so i will call my friends out when they are not being good friends and strive to create a better relationship. i believe that positivity is the key to success. throughout my life, i have a tendency to turn negative. if something small happens to me i might just become negative overall. in his speech about the two notre dame’s, father grove stated, “we believe that there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing”(“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c). at the time i read this quote, i understood what it said but it did not really resonate with me that much. however, one day in class, one of my classmates stated that they try to wake up every day and say to themselves, “today is going to be a great day”. i decided to try this strategy out one morning, and i found that my day was way better overall. that little bit of positivity when you wake up can change your whole attitude for the rest of the day. i have now started to try to be positive about almost everything that happens to me. i have found that my life has become much better since doing so. i believe that our roots are crucial to understanding who we are. in week six, we created our “where i am from” poems and i learned a lot about myself. i understood what experiences have had a major impact on my life and shaped who i am. in my poem, i wrote, “i am from older siblings and loving family”(“where i am from” by ryan dufour-moreau fye week 6). this was the first line that came to mind when i started to brainstorm. i realized that my family has really been the main driver of who i am today. as the youngest child, my parents and siblings have guided me every step of the way and shaped me into the person i am. after writing the poem, i looked back at all the places, activities, and people that i mentioned and i realized that https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/assignments/30499 there are many things that depict “where i am from” and they have all shaped my values and perspectives. i believe that the truth is one of the most important things in today’s society. in the world we live in there are many people out to deceive us. whether it is news sources, politicians or anyone else, there is a war on the truth. this has put a premium on evaluating each situation and making your own decision. in the scientific american article, as the authors discuss implicit bias they write, “there is a mountain of evidence-independent of any single test-that implicit bias is real”(“how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris-moreau fye week seven). the fact that virtually everyone has some sort of implicit bias was very surprising to me. i like to think that i treat everyone fairly and don’t have any implicit bias. then, i began to think deeper and think about some of the examples in the article. i realized that sometimes i do have preconceived notions about people when i haven’t even met them. i made it a goal of mine to judge everyone by character. basically, understand everyone's truth. everyone has their own truth. we must demand the truth in our society but also see the truth of each person’s character. these beliefs are at the core of my being and i will strive to uphold them every day. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102775 integration #1 i am on a path to fulfillment. i am searching for a solid foundation. coming here to notre dame was arguably the biggest change in my life thus far. moving from living with my family through the daily bustle of the washington, d.c. area to life alone in south bend, indiana was the day i was dreading all summer. through the days and days of brutal manual labor doing landscaping throughout the summer, the day i’d leave for south bend came quickly, and now i’m here in week 8, reflecting on my college experience thus far. college is a land of opportunities; i’ve always been a shy person so i wasn’t sure how willing i’d be to take advantage of these opportunities. however, i recognize that taking advantage of initial opportunities to put myself out there, even if i might feel uncomfortable or embarrass myself in doing so, is essential for me to build the foundation i desire. in facing my weakness of venturing outside of my comfort zone, i see a connection to the idea in week 2 of adam 1 and adam 2 david brooks discussed in his ted talk. in establishing this comparison, brooks outlines how “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths, adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses.” adam 2 is the one i really hoped to focus on during my first few weeks, and i feel like i did a pretty good job of that even though i endured some uncomfortable experiences and made some decisions i probably wouldn’t make again if i could do it over again. nevertheless, venturing outside of my comfort zone has allowed me to make lasting friendships and join myself to numerous groups even though it’s one of my weaknesses. (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” david brooks, moreau fye week 2) in building this foundation with the groups and friends i’ve found so far, i also see a connection to the idea of healthy and unhealthy relationships we talked about in week 4. i’ve gone through a lot of trial and error in terms of meeting people and testing out our relationships, and i really feel that i’ve been able to prioritize the friendships that feel like both of us are equally invested and respectful of each other. in olivia taylor’s article on toxic relationships, i can see my relationship with one of the first people i got to know at notre dame as a toxic relationship. she never really listened to what i had to say, and when i made a plan to go on a walk with her one weekend, she bailed at the last minute. while the high school grant might have continued to pursue that relationship, i think it’s for the best that the college grant knows it’s time to find friends that care about him and will be there for him. i’ve been so lucky to find my roommate to be a perfect example of this; i trust him to be there for me, we eat meals together, and i came home from classes today to see he had folded my laundry for me (and i didn’t even ask him to!) he really cares about me and i’m glad that i recognize that and am working on building an even stronger relationship with him (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week 4). one final connection that i see between the content we’ve covered and the foundation i’m trying to build comes from our week 7 discussion about stereotypes. as i’ve gotten to know people around campus, i’ve realized that there’s more to everyone than what meets the eye or what i might think of them based on my initial stereotype of them. i’ve never been a huge party guy or someone who drinks much alcohol, and from my high school days i had a pretty solid stereotype formed of those kinds of people as not generally my kind of people. when i met one of the guys right next door to me, i kind of dismissed him after hearing from others that he was a big partier. i usually don’t identify myself with those people, and even looking back on it i don’t even usually give them a chance. but this is the importance of not letting the idea of a “single story” from adichie’s ted talk restrict our relationships with others. once i got to know this guy, i found him to be a really genuine, caring person even though i had previously dismissed him as someone i didn’t want to be friends with. this illustrates how the “single stories” we formulate and utilize are oftentimes inaccurate and prevent us from having relationships like mine with the guy next door. i’m still working on getting over these kinds of stereotypes, but i feel that i’m in a better place than where i came in with regards to them (“danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie, moreau fye week 7). all in all, while i feel like i’m on the way to the foundation i desire, i still have a ways to go. i believe that i will grow by living out my ideals in my future. i’m not really sure what i want to do with my life. plain and simple, i came into notre dame undecided and just chose mendoza because it seemed like it had a lot of possibilities for me to find something i enjoy. while it remains to be seen whether i will end up doing something in business, i know one thing for certain about my future; i hope to grow while keeping in mind where i came from. the “where i’m from” poem we looked at in week 6, written by george ella lyon, gave me a glimpse into lyon’s background and what shaped him into the person he is now. as i wrote my own poem, reflecting on the ups and downs of my life brought me to tears. i see this as a sign of how important my life so far has been to me; all the little things i’ve experienced throughout my life have shaped me into the person i am now. i know whatever i do in life, i won’t forget where i came from (“where i’m from” george ella lyon, moreau fye week 6). as i discern what i want to do with my life, i also know that it’s more than just a job i’m looking for when i come out of college; it’s a life that i’m looking for. after bad tests or bad projects in high school, my parents would never fail to remind me that grades and schoolwork aren’t everything; it’s about finding a work-life balance, and the life part is what you’ll remember, not the work part. i see a connection between this and the week 5 video from father kevin grove. one quote in particular stuck out to me; “our lives are more than our resumes.” this is extremely important as i progress as a mendoza student because i’ve seen the resume pressures already; in sibc, applications for travel-team programs are coming out and many of my friends have been writing their resumes as a part of these applications. condensing your life and your experiences into a sheet or two of paper is not what it’s all about; life is about the little conversations you have, the little moments you share with others, and the daily shenanigans. i need to keep my parents’ advice with me as i continue my academic journey, and more importantly, my life journey, here in these next four years at notre dame, and i hope to find a path where i can live my life to the fullest without losing where i came from (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” fr. kevin grove, moreau fye week 5). i believe that i have plenty of room for improvement. as i grow into the person i want to become, i recognize that there are plenty of areas for improvement. one key aspect that i’d like to improve upon is my relationship with god. my faith has been on a bit of an up and down recently, and although i feel okay with where i am now, i’d really like to improve. oftentimes i find myself feeling like the faith cycle is a little bit repetitive, and this has made me frustrated in the past. but taking a quote from the student reflections on faith we covered in week 3 gives me some reassurance; as ryan, a student from the class of 2021 put it, “but what we might miss is that even as we walk over the same ground again and again, we are rising.” even as i’m going through this same cycle, i’m continuing to develop; the challenge for me is recognizing that and not losing my motivation to continue on this cycle as i develop my relationship with god (“student reflections on faith” campus ministry, moreau fye week 3). as i improve, i also think i need to do a better job of focusing on the things i do well than always focusing on my shortcomings. i’m often hard on myself and don’t give myself much slack when things go wrong. this connects to brené brown’s ted talk from week one; in talking about her desire for perfection and her focus on mistakes rather than her strengths, brown notes how talking with her boss would bring her “37 things [she did] really awesome and one thing that’s an opportunity for growth,” and her principal focus was the opportunity for growth. as i continue to improve, i need to recognize the places where i succeed instead of the places where i fail; this would bring more positivity to the process and i think i could really benefit from it (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i know there’s a lot of room for improvement, but i feel like i’m well equipped to work towards improvement. the clay that welcomes the potter during my first semester at notre dame, i have encountered the potential to build. to build not just on things like relationships and memories, but also on myself and the community. i intend to continue to embrace these opportunities whenever possible because they are incredibly rewarding for me and those around me. when i first arrived on campus this fall, i was somewhat worried i didn’t belong. the picture of college life i had painted over the years was a bit far from reality. the ideal world with unlimited freedom, parties, and excitement was actually a relatively small part of my life at nd. there is a lot of work that needs to be done and little time to do it. additionally, it was hard to adjust from straight as in my high school to now getting some bs and even the occasional c. for a brief period, i was suffering from a bit of imposter syndrome because many of my friends here seemed like they were going out more than me and having more fun than me, all while still having less work than me. thankfully, however, when i started to talk about these things with the other freshmen in my dorm, they explained that they all felt similarly to me even though i had thought otherwise. much like elizabeth cox explains in her ted talk, finding out that other people were also having feelings of imposter syndrome did a lot to help me validate myself. i was able to open myself up more to the community because now i truly did feel like i belonged to it (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo – moreau fye week 9). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo i started to open myself up to the community when i really saw how many opportunities exist to build it and myself up. of course, i would first have to become a part of this community to make use of this potential, and in his article “thirteen ways of looking at community,” parker j. palmer describes exactly the best ways to do that. he explains that community is a gift to be received, which requires people to have a capacity to connect with others rather than a network built through forced interaction. i have personally found this to be the case as i’ve already forgotten many of the people i met during welcome week activities, and instead, my closest friends are the people in my dorm who i interact with naturally on a daily basis. as i shared more with the people in my dorm, they also shared more with me. one of my close friends was visibly upset about something, so the rest of us decided to ask him if everything was ok. he told us that his cousin had passed away in a drunk driving accident that morning, and he was absolutely devastated by it. we decided the best route to helping him would be to have him tell us stories of all the good times they had together. once he was feeling better, he made us all agree never to drive drunk. we went one step further and set up a system for sharing rides to parties to completely avoid that risk all together. this process of healing reminds me a lot of the kintsugi technique from the workshop in the grotto video. just like the broken pieces of pottery are stuck back together with gold to rebuild the pot that represented trauma as a symbol of overcoming it, our friend was able to grieve and heal by telling us the best stories about his cousin to build a perfect memory of her to overcome his sadness and bring members of our community together in solidarity with him (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto https://grottonetwork.com/make-animpact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ moreau fye week 10). the more people i connected with in this manner, the more i saw that the community had so many opportunities available to build it up further and sculpt it into something even more beautiful like a potter making a pot from clay. for example, as i became close with the people around me, i learned more about their parts of the community and the ways that i could help them out. not only did i see that these opportunities existed all around me, but i also saw that every opportunity was exciting and enticing because of the great relationships i was creating. each of these opportunities led to many more. the most important common thread between all these opportunities to build community was hope. in nearly every scenario, the end goal was to give someone else hope, whether it be hope that their situation will improve, hope that they can achieve goals, or hope that they can overcome a crisis. when we can inspire hope in others in our community, they can then spread that hope even further to others. additionally, individuals who get hope from others in the community will likely be able to return the favor. much like c.s. lewis describes in the screwtape letters, hope comes in cycles with peaks and troughs (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625/download?download_frd=1 – moreau fye week 10). we as a community can help individual members get through their troughs and into their peaks and many times they will do the same for us when we need https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625/download?download_frd=1 it. this was the case for me during a week where i had an exam i was really worried about. one of my friends to whom i had recently given food while he was sick saw that i was concerned and asked how he could help. thankfully, he was in that class as well, so we agreed to study together even though he was already fully prepared for the test. i greatly appreciated his time and efforts because i needed that help. throughout my first semester at notre dame, i have encountered an incredibly welcoming community that presents a bounty of opportunities to improve it and myself on a daily basis. whether it is through small acts of compassion, a show of friendship, or just being open to new experiences, i intend to take advantage of as many of these opportunities as possible during my time here because i have already seen the potential they have to make the community around me a better place for everyone even if it’s just a bit at a time. capstone integration conway 1 professor pruitt moreau fye 29 april 2022 the path to a life well-lived: will i find it at notre dame? i believe that when good things happen, you have a right to hold them tight. therefore, i will seek out happiness and embrace it when it comes. specifically, i task myself to lean into relationships, to put my trust into the hands of others and allow them to hold it. i value community and i want to be loved, so i will not back down from relationships. i will hold firm to the happiness i receive from others and i will be present with them. i will experience with and live through. furthermore, i believe that being satisfied with yourself at the end of the day is an achievement worth working towards. it is hard to reflect on yourself and be truly, genuinely proud, but i will strive for this feeling of inner harmony. to do this i will work my hardest. i will get a job that i love and do it well. i will work to promote the good of others through my occupation and grow as my own person in the process. though, i will still continue to appreciate life inherent. i will read the books i want to read and take sunset walks and open the window to smell the rain. no matter what successes i chase or what direction i am taken in, i will always consider the point of life to be alive. this being said, as i live, i will attempt to figure out what exactly it is that makes us alive, that forms our lives. i will strive for all of this because i believe in the idea of eudaimonia of human flourishing of the idea that the greatest good is to truly live and to live well for yourself and conway 2 others. at the end of my life, i want to feel a sense of eudaimonia, and i follow my goals in pursuit of that. i believe that this mission statement isn’t only a reflection of how i’ve grown over the past year, but also a guideline for how i want to continue to thrive in the upcoming years of my life. first, i want to seek out happiness and embrace all the good times i have. i believe i have been doing this way better than i have in the past and now my future is ripe with opportunities. i think this is the main insight that i gained, one i hadn’t been able to articulate properly before, in the mission statement assignment (“writing a personal mission statement activity” by moreau fye week thirteen). an example of this newfound attitude is that i am going to rome this summer to study abroad. when i committed to the program, i didn’t know anyone i knew on the trip, but instead of fear, i faced the opportunity with only happy anticipation (and maybe a little bit of nerves). now, i have already made a few friends in the program, and am even more excited to go. me, of all people, preparing to fly to a foreign country for five weeks having done nothing of the sort before. a year ago, this would have been a completely ludicrous notion but now it is a reality. dr. kim’s message in our week six moreau assignment really hits home with this point. we have to let all of our emotions in and feel them as they come. it’s ok to be a little anxious, but we also have the right to be happy when we have the chance to be and the duty to ourselves to experience our joy full force (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). i embraced the opportunity i was given and am ready to embark on it backed with confidence in myself and trust in my ability to make friends and open myself up to other people. not only will i get to learn new things about myself on this trip, but i will also be able to experience another culture in a way that i have never had the chance to https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 conway 3 before. there is so much we don’t know about each other, whether it's personal, cultural, or situational, and that is why it is so important to make the effort in the first place (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). this being said, something i believe strongly, that we discussed in week xii, is that we have to contextualize our knowledge of other people (“‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something’” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). in other words, you have to place people within their life experiences in order to best understand and respect them; i can’t assume that everyone i meet in rome will have the same life experiences as me because that would be diminishing their value and ruining my own chance for learning. we all have a better chance of living a happy, fulfilled life if we embrace the experiences of others and add them to our own perspective, and that is the main thing i hope to gain in rome (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). another important way i want to incorporate my mission statement into my life is through my career. i want a job where i can do good for others, and thus be proud of myself because being able to love what you do when you get up in the morning and when you go to sleep at night is so crucial to a good life (“week 5 discernment conversation activity” by pete conway moreau fye week five). with the help of the moreau activities we did, i have discovered over the past year that i want to go to law school and work as a human rights lawyer (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). specifically, i think i want to work with refugees. the discussions we had as a class in moreau this semester also guided me in this direction and i am very grateful for that. we spoke so much about giving to and gaining from as a key to interaction and, specifically, in week ix we talked about reciprocity (“teaching https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit conway 4 accompaniment a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i want to learn from people all around the world; i don’t want my perspective to be only as a girl from the new jersey suburbs i want to experience so much more than that. i also want to do good for others and actively participate in the world community. a tangible step i am taking towards this goal here at notre dame is applying to be a research assistant in the kellogg international scholars program. if all goes well, next year i will be helping a professor with his research on genocide and mass atrocities, and i could not be more excited. i am taking another step into the real world and finally getting a chance to see my interests materialize into something tangible. furthermore, especially with polarizing social media, we have to be careful with what we consume, but through this program, i’ll get the chance to learn on my own initiative and with my own senses (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i’ll be able to pave my own path into my future. moreover, even just making my schedule for next semester, i haven’t been so passionate about the classes i’m taking in a very long time. it is so important to find your calling and act on it because not only will that help you live your best life for yourself, but also, for others as well. if you have passion and drive, then the results will be clear people will feel the positive effects of your calling and you will be able to maximize your good in the world (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). the last aspect of my mission statement that i want to continue to animate throughout my time at notre dame is the skill of simply living. this is something i have talked about consistently over the last year, especially in the last integration, but i honestly cannot emphasize how important it is to my personal view of a life well-lived (“integration iii assignment” by moreau fye week eight). one specific example that comes to mind is https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit conway 5 when my friends and i recently walked to the huddle to grab some snacks but, since it was so nice out, we decided to stay outside for the rest of the night. we got our ice cream and sat on the quad, talking and looking at the stars. this is my favorite kind of experience and it put me in such a good headspace for the next few weeks, which are going to be tough for all of us. life moves so fast and there is so much expected of us and sometimes it's hard to remember the value of slowing down, but it is something so crucial to our well-being and happiness (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). despite all the plans i have for my future and all the activities i plan to do over the next three years, i also want to just be able to enjoy college because it is college. when else am i going to be able to live with all of my friends and be able to stay up all night doing nothing? i have really appreciated this part of my life as something so special and unique, and plan to take full advantage of it while i can. though, this isn’t a lifestyle that only pertains to college but, rather, something i want to continue to pursue throughout my entire life. i want to keep loving and appreciating life until the day i die because, not to be trite but, what’s the point if not to be actually alive when you are alive (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). overall, i think that the mission statement i created is a good reflection of my values and an accurate representation of the path i want to take on my journey of living a well-lived life. living well requires a combination of appreciating the world around you, loving being yourself, enjoying what you do, and learning from others. you should find harmony both within yourself and through other people. i hope to be able to realize this throughout my next three years at notre dame and i am going to work hard to do so. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 blake wesley blake’s wonderful journey with notre dame welcome to my moreau journey. i am here to talk about my challenges and the other beliefs that happen throughout this moreau experience. my beliefs are different from everyone else beliefs because everyone has a different experience for moreau. i believe my purpose is to maintain my study habits. this is one of my beliefs because i need to maintain my study habits so i can keep up on my grades. my origins for this belief are that i have to be focused up and ask questions and pay attention in class and do not let others, or my phone distract me. to develop this belief i am going to have to be consistent and be focused on do not let anything distract me from doing this belief. the challenges i would have to deal with are letting my friends come in the way or letting girls distract me or even video games. this belief means everything to me because having a study habit will make you a better person in life and academically because you will have a good reference for things and be organized. this belief is related to the week is self-knowledge. i am saying this because self-knowledge is a big part of maintaining my study habits because when i am really tired and really busy i tend to lack on my studies and slowly become disorganized and i feel like when stuff like that happens i need to maintain my organization so i could keep being consistent on them. by doing the little things it would become easier for me to become more neet than sloppy. also when we talked in moreau we talked about finding the truth in yourself. you want to have the truth so you can get things done easier and not just by doing the bare minimum. comment by ashley burkholder: i believe that my purpose is to be the best version of myself by doing the small things in life the right way my second belief is i believe that i grow by people’s positive feedback. this belief plays a huge role to me because as a person you would want to get good feedback from someone that is positive feedback so you can take it and put it into your own life and tell someone how you got there. the origin for this belief is that i would have to start little and work my way up and take people’s feedback in life and put them in my own life. my development for this belief was that i have seen many different positive feedbacks. for example. in the summer for summer school here at notre dame, we had basketball workouts. the players on the team are really good people and when we were doing a drill someone commented on me and said “good shot blake” i said yessir. after that happen my shot continued to fall and i make consistent shots and that positive feedback builds you up more because in your head you are like o i just hit that and they said good shot, let me go ahead and hit the next one. that build me up because of the positive energy. we talked about life-giving relationships in class and during the homework. when i search for life-giving relationships i can search for one because they are filling me up with positive feedback and both of us are growing because of the positivity that is taking place. being positive will get you so far in life because the more positive you are the more your life would become much easier and nice, and people will start to respect you because of how positive you are towards them. we also talked about faith shapes the way we see the world and see other people. faith means you always need to give other people feedback because they need positive feedbacks just like i need positive feedback. i need to build other people up because everyone is a child of god and i feel like in today’s world everyone needs positivity towards each other. it would make the world so much easier. comment by ashley burkholder: life giving relationships where both people grow together. when other people give you positive feedback, you grow closer together because you know you can trust them to help you get better my third belief is being a leader. being a leader is rare in today’s world because some people are scared to speak up and some just don’t talk and are quiet. i play basketball and basketball is all about communicating with each other. you have to be able to talk on defense and even sometimes on offense. for example. during practice, somebody did the drill wrong and i stepped up as a freshman and said you all good move on from it and onto the next drill. me speaking up to the person who did the drill wrong helped my other teammates out because it helped them not to do the same thing he just did. and by my voice speaking up everyone was just fine after that. it does do not matter how old you are in college basketball to be a leader. anybody can be a leader if they put their minds into it and don’t care what anyone else thinks or says. you can also be a leader off the court. if you see a group not doing something good and look like they are up to something talk to that group and tell them what is right and what’s not right so they can understand. in class w talked about bias and part of being a leader is stepping up and talk to somebody and tell them to not judge a book by its cover off somebody because you have no idea what they are going through class we made a poem about who we were as a student and before you talk about someone get to know them first and do not just start talking about them. my origin for this belief is never be afraid to speak up and talk to people and be a loud leader. as a freshman i love speaking up because people think just because i am a freshman that means we do not listen but that is not the case at all. if you put your mind into people will start respecting you. in class we talked about how to be truthful and being a leader you have to become a truthful person. wk 8 myfe integration emily mcdougall oswald mfye integration 15 october 2021 two paths to emily i believe that i grow by embracing discomfort. in my life, i think that there have been many forks in the road where i could have easily taken the easier path, and instead chose, out of wisdom or sheer stubbornness, the less simple route. one of those decisions was choosing notre dame. i felt that with my other options for college, i would have been choosing the comfortable, safe route. but even though nd was the best choice, it was a decision to choose the more uncomfortable environment: 800 miles from home, only two other friends from high school, and a pool of peers who were the top of the top. it was an incredible exercise in the vulnerability brené brown addressed in week one. in her ted talk, brown points out that vulnerability is at the core of both fear and belonging; you cannot have one without the other, as uncomfortable as it may be (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). i felt like i made the most authentic connections when i tapped into vulnerability and opened myself up to potentially uncomfortable situations. even when i failed, or i tried to reach out and the potential friend was just not having it, i honestly didn’t get too discouraged. to be honest, i found that most of the time, people wanted to build relationships and connections. and if they weren’t, then i was okay with that. it was uncomfortable to say the least, but as father kevin grove said, “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin groves moreau fye week 5). my failures were not only limited to social snafus; i struggled at first to get used to the academic environment, and i was off balance with my schoolwork at the beginning. it was a tough adjustment academically, and i was again faced with two choices: give into the doubt that was creeping into my mind, the fear that i had somehow gotten in by mistake and that i wasn’t really meant to be here – or use the discomfort to get better. i chose the second. i’ve spent some late nights in the library, chosen to stay in or sacrifice the fun for assignments, but in the end, i think choosing to be uncomfortable with where i was at academically has laid the foundation for a better work ethic overall. whether it’s socially or academically, embracing discomfort has given me some of the most rewarding experiences of my life. i believe that i am at my best when i am myself as we moved into the second week of the semester, i found that i not only had to choose discomfort, but also make sure that i was choosing to be authentically myself. when i went to the sao activities fair, there were as many booths as possibilities for who i could be; i could be a singer, or a dancer, or someone who was really into texas-related things (unlikely, given my oklahoma roots and the deep-seeded rivalry, but i digress). i signed up for so many listservs i think my email groaned when they started rolling in. my eagerness to sign up – and to belong to something – reflects the dichotomy between the adam i and adam ii referenced in david brook’s ted talk (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim moreau fye week 2). there was plenty of opportunity to live for my resume – the ever-growing list of clubs that have caught my eye and my email inbox prove that. but i also thought a lot about what attracted my heart as i walked around the stadium, collecting stickers and free pens. i eventually have started to work out how i want to dedicate my time in a way that best balances the two adams. one of my favorite things i have joined i feel actually balances the two well. as one of the newest flippers on the student union board, i have the adam i part down. i’m a planning, organizing, brainstorming machine when it comes to sub events. but i’ve also found that i’m excited to go to meetings, to find philanthropic angles, to build new connections with the other sub members. it’s the adam ii part of me that finds the sub community, and the other communities that i’ve joined so fulfilling. but the concept of ‘myself’ is more than just emily i and emily ii. my faith is a large part of who i am that i wanted to develop here. i found a deeper relationship with god, but i wanted to give definition to that connection in college. i found so many places to deepen my faith in these first few months, but i found myself feeling the most connected on my late-night pilgrimages to the grotto. at least twice a week, i find myself antsy and restless in my dorm room, so i tell my roommate goodbye, and walk to the grotto by myself. those walks remind me of the quote from week 3: “faith, hope, and love adjust the lighting of our life so that we look beyond ourselves to see god” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). by tapping into what my heart and my faith were telling me by going on those grotto walks, i was putting myself aside to talk to god and illuminate what i needed to hear like the candles of the grotto lighting up the night. all of these pieces – faith, community, connection – are parts of myself that i actively choose to nurture and develop. i believe that i am responsible for taking care of myself and others now that i have chosen who i am and the parts of myself that i want to grow, this leads to my third belief statement about my purpose. i think that we all have a responsibility to care for the people around us. where i’m from, there is a sense of hospitality and neighborly care inherent to the community. as i talked about in the where i’m from poem from week 6 inspired by george ella lyon, i wanted to express how more often than not, i am in the middle of everything; i’ve found at nd this especially applies to the middle of my relationships and support for others (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau week 6). i’ve already spent some of my night here talking through struggles or lending a helping hand with new friends who are going through a tough time. we’ve sat on the lounge couches of jfam till early in the morning trying to figure out how we can fix this problem, help that person who’s struggles, or how to move on from that guy or toxic friendship. my roommate struggled this semester with a toxic friend who was drinking way too much, but because they were from the same hometown and he said it was “just part of the college experience,” she didn’t know how to address it with him. i actually found the “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” article we discussed in week 4 super helpful in this situation (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau week 4). even though i’m not close with him, i still felt responsible for helping my roommate figure out how to identify the unhealthy parts of their relationship, and be able to move forward in a better way. however, in order to take care of others and myself in a way that is compassionate and not condescending, i have learned that i need to check my implicit biases like we discussed in week 8. if i can check my assumptions, i can form better relationships and be able to see people for https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ who they are, not just a single stereotype i’ve been exposed to, like chimamanda ngozi adichie talked about in her ted talk ( "danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye 7). meeting so many people from different backgrounds and places here has especially helped me realize to be mindful of everyone else’s experiences, in little funny ways (“you don’t say y’all?!) to bigger identity-based ways. my roommate is adopted, and we’ve had lots of conversations about where we’re from and how it’s shaped up. these skills are tools that i can use to help the instincts i already have – to help others be the most authentic and healthy versions of themselves. i’ve always found myself reaching out to support others, and i believe that i am good at giving people the kind of support they need most, whether it’s a hug, a distraction, or just someone to talk to. i am also trying to work on being that person for myself, and giving myself the kind of support i would wholeheartedly give to someone else. so at this point in the semester, i am again standing at a crossroads, but one with so many possibilities and paths going forward that i don’t know where to begin – but i know it will be amazing. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story casper fys 10102 ryan retartha 4 march 2022 obituary: katherine “kate” casper born in washington, d.c., on june 10, 2003, was raised in a suburb of our nation’s capital, alexandria, va. she was raised by parents joan and flip casper and was an only child. growing up, she was a spunky, fashion-forward, creative girl—parents would comment at school on her vibrant coordinated outfits and peers adored her fun-loving personality and dedication. in elementary school, she would spend hours crafting beautiful tri-fold boards for class projects, rehearsing presentations, and constructing houses and buildings for her barbie dolls. she had a natural knack for creating, loved pouring her heart out in her diary, and cared for people above all. throughout her life, she identified as an underdog; she wore her heart on her sleeve and never quite fit in, but was always up for a challenge, an adventure, or a chance to get to know someone deeply. attending large public schools, including t.c. williams high school, one of the largest, most diverse schools in the state, kate was surrounded by people different from her her entire life, but she found her sense of belonging in unlikely places: in coffee shops, the school newspaper, the alexandria visitor center where she worked, and in sport. while she only played tennis occasionally past high school, kate’s love for watching and participating in sports and exercise continued throughout her life. her freshman year of high school, her father recalled a scene of her practicing tennis in the snow “in sweatpants and a sweatshirt, blasting some indie music from the portable speaker while fine-tuning an undeniably dinky serve, as the snow continued to fall hard and fast from the sky,” (interview reflection moreau fye week 5). in february of her freshman year of high school, kate tried out for the varsity tennis team, and would go on to serving her peers on and off the courts as captain of the team her junior and senior years. balancing tennis, being the editor and lead contributor of her school newspaper, and working multiple jobs (visitor center information specialist, english tutor, and volunteer at a fair trade nonprofit shop), kate was always busy and full of unique stories and experiences. it’s no wonder kate led such a long and happy life. after high school, kate experienced a crucial period of growth, leaving virginia in the midst of a global pandemic and taking on the rigor, anxiety, and excitement notre dame, indiana would bring. kate attended the university of notre dame through the gateway program where students are hand-picked to partake in a bridge program from holy cross college to notre dame. dual-enrolled her freshman year at both schools within the tri-campus community in notre dame, indiana, kate took great pride in both her identities as a notre dame and holy cross student, and, above all, as a gateway. she worked to recruit gateway students her freshman year as a tour guide and even published articles in the tri-campus newspaper, the observer, about her gateway experience. she would go on in college to be a tour guide for notre dame, work for multiple clubs like mcwell, the juggler, etc., worked extensively in the creative writing department at notre dame alongside her beloved former-professor johannes gorranson, and even became editor of the scene section of the observer her junior year. she spent a month in the summer in south bend working as a tour guide between her freshman and sophomore years and spent the next summer in rome for study abroad. she took the time throughout college to know herself, her “values, interests, personality, and skills,” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). she was never bored and always willing to jump at new life experiences, however terrifying they may be. friends knew her best as funny and reflective, but this sometimes led to burnout. she “felt less in control of [her] life,” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” moreau fye week 6), so, after she graduated from notre dame in 2025, she spent a year traveling abroad in europe, picking up odd jobs and working remotely for a small indie start-up. she figured, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” moreau fye week 1), and she was right. she returned from her year abroad and got a job in chicago working for another start-up on creative strategy and communication. she would work for several start-ups throughout her professional career and stayed in the midwest until the age of 26, when she packed up and moved to new york city, where she worked for one of the leading sustainable fashion brands in the world. she worked on campaigns and increased the brand’s transparency with consumers. kate was a lifelong believer in the informed consumer, and, although she worked for many brands, she was committed to sustainability and honing in on the epidemic of materialism in america. throughout this time, she stayed in touch with her friends and family and made trips back to her hometown and her nana’s house in new jersey whenever she could. but kate was always determined to be present, especially in a city like new york. she knew, “we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we can possibly be…” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” moreau fye week 3), and she knew the big apple was no longer the place she could achieve her full potential. in her early 30’s, kate returned to the d.c. metro area where she reconnected with an old friend from college who would become her husband. the two would move to milwaukee, wisconsin where they would raise three children, one of whom would go on to carry the torch at notre dame. kate and her husband raised their children in public schools in milwaukee, and raised the next generation of fightin’ irish fans. they lived humbly in a nice single-family home near lake michigan and taught their children gratitude, patience, and love in everything they did. she and her husband often hosted neighborhood gatherings and parties for their kids; their home was known as the hub where people would congregate on friday nights and neighborhoods would go if they needed an egg and couldn’t run to the store. kate often reminded herself that she and her family “could have very well ended up among today’s ‘discarded’ people,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” moreau fye week 7), so she taught her children through experience the value of never taking life for granted. the family would volunteer almost every weekend and make sandwiches for their church’s monthly sandwich drives for the homeless. when all of her children were in high school, she and her husband took them to their first notre dame game. she played the hesburgh documentary for them on the way down from wisconsin to indiana. she wanted to instill in her children that they must take care of the people they love in the way father ted did: “the family didn’t have the resources for her to stay at notre dame. father ted took care of that,” (“hesburgh” moreau fye week 2). when she retired at the age of 60, kate moved back to alexandria, virginia with her husband and worked as a high school teacher at t.c. williams, now alexandria city high school. she was an english teacher and journalism teacher and continued the legacy of her beloved high school newspaper. she spent the rest of her days in an estate in manassas where she fostered many animals and owned chickens. died at the age of 95, leaving behind three beautiful children and an everlasting legacy. integration two tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 encountering new directions the second half of the semester has brought about many new experiences as i have settled into college life. these new experiences spark periods of reflection as they coincide with the weekly moreau first year experience prompts. learning how to respond and grow from these experiences the first time around will help me when i encounter these same experiences in the future. week 9’s topic of “encountering dissonance” strongly resonated with me because of how the emotions discussed were all emotions that i have experienced during my first semester of college. during the first month of college, i felt like i was not connecting with anyone except with one of my roommates. it was hard for me to understand why my conversations with other students in my classes felt superficial. during the weekends, i would see students on campus going to parties in large groups and friends from back home posting on social media about so many things happening during their weekends; i could not help but think “what am i doing wrong?” however, as i settled into the semester, i became more comfortable with myself and eventually found three other girls with whom i am very close. upon reflection, i realize that all college freshmen have at one point or another felt a feeling of loneliness and questioned what they were doing wrong. “understand that your loneliness is not failure, and that you are far from being alone in this feeling” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine) said by emery bergmann sums up this emotion. week 9 https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html tran 2 also touches on imposter syndrome. this feeling of unworthiness has appeared when i would sit in my principles of microeconomics class. i found that it took me longer to grasp a concept, so i would be unable to answer questions in class, but many students could answer questions right after being taught a concept. i would often question how i was in the same class as those students. it took me a while before i could accept that my mind just takes longer to learn economics. beyond graded homework, i would do extra practice problems and attend office hours to ensure that i fully understood a topic. as the end of the semester is nearing, i can say that having difficulties with economics might have been life’s way of teaching me to ask for help. “encountering brokenness” in week 10 provided greater clarity for what needs to happen when things must change. humans are naturally self-interested beings. we do things that are in our best interest and benefit ourselves. naturally, we do not automatically think about how our actions will affect others. because of this natural inclination, we must correct our ways about how we approach something that needs to change in our lives, society, and the world. father jenkins’ statement that “both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father jenkins moreau fye week ten) clearly outlines that people never think that their actions are wrong. for real and long-lasting change to occur, both parties must assess not only the actions of the other party but also their own actions. this broad topic can apply on a smaller scale like my own life. when i disagree with one of my roommates, i must take a step back to assess my own actions to see if i have caused any harm or hostility. after i have examined my own actions, i must also give my roommate the benefit of the doubt before speaking with her. by approaching a situation this way, effective and long-lasting change will take place. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ tran 3 week 11’s emphasis on community and society is highly based on how much today’s world relies on technology, social media, and online outlets for information and news. on social media especially, it is so easy for young people to only see one side or a biased perspective on an issue. when we keep clicking or viewing a certain perspective on an issue, the algorithm for an app or media outlet will continue to feed us the same perspective. this promotes narrow mindedness in many young people, and narrow mindedness pushes us away from different ways of thinking, different people, and ultimately having a community. parker j. palmer states “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). when we do not have a “capacity for connectedness,” we internally do not want to connect with a different group of people for some reason. these reasons are often prejudices or stereotypes that occur because of social media and technology. i have caught myself stereotyping people, and when i catch myself in the act, i try to immediately correct my thoughts. when all is said and done, i am no different than the people around me because we are all humans, and many of my prenotions have been planted in my thoughts through society. society does not know much about the truth of people, so i cannot let myself always believe what i see on social media, the news, and what i hear around me. week 12’s topic of hope addresses a very real human emotion that helps us understand and survive difficult times. hope helps us believe that bad times will not go on forever and also helps us look forward to something in the future. for many catholics, we hope that the way we are living our lives will lead us to salvation in heaven with god. a way to fulfill this hope is to live how jesus lived. father james b. king says, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ tran 4 heaven” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week twelve). living as jesus did will not only bring us closer to salvation but also bring us to completeness. sometimes when i get frustrated, i think to myself “what am i even doing?” during these times, it is helpful for me to take a step back and realize that i am not living for myself but for god. simply changing my thoughts to center around the previous statement helps give me motivation. living and experiencing life gives me greater meaning and purpose when i tell myself that what i am doing is for god. new experiences have helped me to develop a broader mindset about society and myself. i am not alone in my feelings of loneliness as a college freshman. myself and other freshmen are all starting from a clean slate, possibly knowing no one, so it is expected that we may feel alone in our feelings. i have to take initiatives when i know that i am lacking in some part of my academics. similar to my economics class, if in the future i am struggling with a class, i must use the resources available to me to help me succeed. for lasting change to take place, i must consider my actions and the actions of the other party to come to an agreeable outcome. with today’s society being so dominated by social media, i must stay true to what i believe in and not quickly agree with the biased news i may see online. finally, i must have hope that what i am doing in the present will in the future guide me towards salvation in heaven. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration two december 3, 2021 creating a new balance in a new life throughout my childhood life, i was focused on mainly two things: getting as, and excelling in sports. even in elementary school, you would certainly find me either learning words and reading, or outside playing sports. this trend continued all throughout high school. sports and school. my heightened focus and desire on these two things came from my parents. not that they ordered me to only focus on these things, but that their experiences made me feel like i had to. with both of them being college athletes attending top universities, i thought that i would be a failure if i didn’t live up to those standards. my dad played wide receiver at brown university, and for my entire life that was all i wanted to do. i had partially reached one of the goals when the coach offered me a preferred walk-on spot, as long as i got into brown academically. it wasn’t until i got that rejection letter from brown that i realized “[i] can’t live [my] life according to the expectations of others. when [i] do, [i’m not] living [my] own life — [i’m] living someone else’s life.” my disappointment was immense. it felt like everything i had worked for was destroyed. i couldn’t attend brown and i couldn’t play football. that was my one shot. fortunately, my dad encouraged me and told me that brown wasn’t all that great anyway, and that i should carve my own path and reach my own new experiences that no one in our family had before. of course, i ended up deciding on notre dame, and the environment and experiences that i’ve already had here could never be achieved at a school like brown. the political world today is a huge mess. colleges like notre dame, where people from all over the world with vastly different perspectives and life encounters come together are a hotspot for political discussion and controversy. sadly, when it comes to american politics, there is an abundance of dissent and animosity towards the other side. unfortunately, in many of these disputes, “most everyone would prefer there were less hatred in the world, yet there seems to be december 3, 2021 more — which is indirect proof that no one apparently wants to give up any of their own.” meaning that people are stubborn, and defiant to look at an issue through a different lens. in my short time at notre dame, i have encountered this hatred and stubbornness, leading to disagreements that put the entire campus at odds. catholic ideals, the lqbtq community, law enforcement bias, race relations, the argument of the legality abortion, and many more continue to cause disagreements and anger between students. earlier in the semester, an article regarding notre dame’s encouragement of the lgbtq community published on the irish rover was a large cause for controversy. however, i think many notre dame students handled the situation very well. using social platforms, students expressed their support for both the catholic church and the queer community in a calm way, sure not to spread hatred towards anyone on our campus. from that situation, i’ve learned better how to handle controversy and address those who attack my beliefs adequately: with understanding, respect, and love. at notre dame, i hope to make lifelong friendships and lasting, healthy relationships. i know that many of my siblings and friends at other universities find it difficult to reach an adequate balance between fighting for a top spot in the class and creating beneficial friendships with those in and out of that class. i’ve even read about some people choosing to study on their own in an effort to do better than others and not help others reach the same level of success, because that may be at the expense of their class standing. notre dame never has this conundrum. friends in classes study together, everyone strives to be the best student they can be, and there is no animosity between students achieving greater than one another. while i was in high school, i was an independent worker; not because i wanted to achieve greater success than others, but because school came easier to me and i figured i could get the work done faster when speeding through it on my own. the rigorous academics and emphasis on building relationships december 3, 2021 during my first semester at notre dame has taught me that “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. the self-sufficiency i feel in success is a mirage.” at the beginning of the semester, i continued with my old study habits and my independent work style. let’s just say, it didn’t take long for me to realize that was not going to work in this new environment. using the available resources of my tight carroll community, i was able to easily find those who did not have the same struggles as me in my classes, and i leaned on them for support and aid when i really needed it on certain assignments. i learned how not to be ashamed of my struggles, and not to be shamed when i needed someone for help. this has helped me already build beneficial relationships that will continue throughout my time at notre dame. i will never forget writing my notre dame essay about transforming my heart and my mind. from the very beginning, notre dame emphasized that “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place.” i can truly say that even over the course of one semester, my heart and mind have developed more than ever before. how i view my study habits, relationships, aspirations, political ideals, and countless others have been altered significantly in just about four months. my mind has changed: learning how to set goals with my own self in mind rather than others, and how to be satisfied with my best, even if it isn’t an a. my heart has changed: learning how to be more compassionate with those who disagree with me, and how to build meaningful relationships where each member of the bond grows together. if i can recognize all of this growth that was able to occur over one short semester, i can’t wait to see how notre dame will develop my heart and mind over the next three and a half years. december 3, 2021 works cited “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine “wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john i. jenkins moreau fye week ten “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven “hope and a holy cross education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187485?module_item_id=104285 fys 10101-83 fall 2021 december 3, 2021 integration one assignment: what have i encountered and how will i respond? how much can change in a few months? (it turns out alot) within my first semester of attending the university of notre dame, i have been able to have many interesting and mind opening experiences. i have been exposed to different people, learned about their unique and interesting perspectives and experiences, and explored new ideas within a prestigious undergraduate education. due to the community rich environment at notre dame that is conducive to personal change and development, i have much to reflect on over the past three short months. i can trace three prominent encounters to my most impactful experiences, which have pushed me to delve into and discover things about my past, current, and future mindset and goals of my college career. the first of these encounters was the formation of my friend group. i knew that leaving my friends and family back home, who i have known for so long and have grown up with, would be difficult. therefore, when i met a good group of people within the first week of school, i was glad to meet great people who are going through the same drastic changes i was but also scared of spending my time with strangers and trying to build relationships from scratch. the class discussed this topic during week one of the first year experience course, when we discussed dr. brene brown’s tedtalk. brown said, “they didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor did they talk about vulnerability being excruciating … they just talked about it being necessary.” (week 1, brown) therefore, i learned that although finding friends and learning to trust and be comfortable around them seems daunting, it is a task that is necessary to get used to as well as very rewarding. another aspect of making friends that was significant to my development was the aspect of meeting new people with different perspectives and ideas. in one text from week ten, christopher j. devron describes the two conflicting opinions about critical race theory and writes, “in catholic school communities, they warn that critical race theory is marxist and therefore anti-catholic. … pope francis looks through a structural lens to detect systemic injustices and calls on people of faith to dismantle them.” (week 10, devron) this quote shows the conflict, controversy, divide, and misunderstanding between the two distinct opinions about whether or not critical race theory should be taught in school, specifically catholic schools. the conflict described in this context is similar to the conflict that i met with some of the people i met within the first months of classes. therefore, i learned that meeting new people, who all have different backgrounds and ideas, can also be difficult but is still rewarding. another week that was relevant to meeting new people was what we learned from week 11 of morau class. in the video “with voices true: 2020 summary snapshot,” one of the participants said, “when you're sitting in the dining hall, it’s like no wonder you would choose to sit with the two or three blacks where you feel like you’ve got more in common.” (week 11) although the person mentioned did not give a personal recollection of how being part of a minority race feels, like the others did, the speaker showed that even those who are in the majority race still feel a separation between races. although the ideas of the speaker are probably common within groups, i think the quote takes away the responsibility of the wider group of students (in the majority) to make an effort to create an environment that is comfortable for different races to interconnect in. this is part of the encounter i had at the university, when it came to making friends. i found that most people were very kind, energetic, and welcoming, but at the end of the day i needed to make an effort to get to know the people around me on a deeper level. this lesson was especially most prominent and profound in my first few months of being here, because it made me realize my overall control and responsibility of my own actions and personal development. another encounter i had within the first few months of attending college was the need to make phone calls to friends and family back home. in week twelve, the class discussed “holy cross and christian education,” by the campus ministry at the university of notre dame, where the author wrote, “when moreau wrote in 1849 that “jesus christ should be our model since our likeness to the divine master is the foundation of our journey to eternal glory.” (week 12) the text explained that striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. therefore, i learned about the need to think of tangible ways to show god our faith and love and make a conscious effort to follow through. similarly, i learned that i also need to make a conscious effort to foster the relationships in my life that i have not yet had to dedicate real effort to make the last encounter that i found to be very prominent to my growth and development since attending the university of notre dame was taking classes in an auditorium. going to class in an auditorium setting, with hundreds of students in one lecture hall, was very different from what i was used to in highschool. this is especially since i attended a small, private, catholic, all-girls high school. in week 9 of classes, i learned about how to deal with this change, along with other changes from what the ‘norm’ was in the past 17 years of my life. in the video entitled “what is imposter syndrome?,” elizabeth cox says, “to call it a syndrome is to downplay how universal it is. it's not a disease or an abnormality, and it isn’t necessarily tied to depression, anxiety, or self-esteem.” (week 9, cox) i feel like i am lucky in that i have had a lot of time over the past couple of years, especially during the infamous covid quarantine era of our lives, to self reflect on my expectations and relationships to my expectations. however, i was still forced to reflect on my new experiences over the past few months. by doing so, i have found things to motivate my work in a fruitful way. of course, it is not always easy to not put unreasonable expectations on myself, but i do think that i have made significant improvement over the past years and something i have a good grasp on at the moment. it used to be black and white for me that i was shy, didn't open up very much and had a hard time expressing my emotions to people, but now i found that i am capable of opening myself up with people i trust, am comfortable with, and it comes alot easier with practice. i realized that in the future, i want to continue to have new experiences and be very mindful of myself and develop myself further, as i continue to grow and educate myself at the university of notre dame. works cited 1. “the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesj tzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4. citation: tedxtalks. (2010). the power of vulnerability. youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesj tzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4. 2. “what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine https://www.youtube.com/watch/zquxl4jm1lo citation: cox, e. (2018, august 28). what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it ... youtube. retrieved october 27, 2021, from https://www.youtube.com/watch/zquxl4jm1lo. 3. “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-h igh-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 citation: devron, c. j., 03, g. p. n., pope francis, dulle, c., & ivry, b. (2021, june 3). should catholic schools teach critical race theory? america magazine. retrieved november 3, 2021, from https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792. 4. “with voices true: 2020 summary snapshot” by the university of notre dame marketing communications moreau fye week eleven https://voicestrue.nd.edu/snapshot-summaries/ citation: marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “snapshot summaries.” with voices true, https://voicestrue.nd.edu/snapshot-summaries/. 5. “holy cross and christian education” by the university of notre dame campus ministry moreau fye week twelve https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471/download?download_frd=1 citation: king, r. j. b. (2013). holy cross and christian education. ave maria press. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471/download?download_frd=1 unanue 2 what have i encountered and how will i respond? as my first semester at notre dame is reaching is stressful yet anticlimactic end, my final moreau integration of the semester has been a powerful tool to help remember and realize how all the new experiences, challenges, and environments i have experienced for the first time here in notre dame have helped develop who i am. although it is my actions and responses that impacted my character this semester, it is the deep dive of the effects of these events during moreau that create their importance. fall break really helped put this in perspective as i was able to directly compare the difference between my life back home in puerto rico (among family friend and the tropical weather which i miss a bit more with every cloudy and cold day) and the challenging yet fun new dynamic i am experiencing in the great south bend, indiana. i got to talk with my younger brother and feel nostalgic when he explained to how his freshman year of high school was going. i also began to feel many similarities between my freshmen year if high school and how my semester of college is going, especially now after experiencing and writing about weeks nine through twelve of moreau. once conversation with my brother that keeps coming to mind as i write this integration has to be the superficially short and simple conversation about his social outings with his friends and while it wasn’t implicitly stated by him (but something i realized proudly as an older brother) how he has expanded his friend group. this conversation reminded me of the first week back from fall break when my moreau class discussed adapting to being the new kid all over again in college. my brother’s words over how he made a new friend during a sports tournament or how he has defined the friend group every guy in existence names in his mind “the boys” is quite similar to what i went through this semester, especially since my first time ever in indiana came during move-in day. the one thing i am thankful for now as this semester is reaching its finally is that i didn’t rush any friendships and only portrayed myself honestly to those i now call my friends. i didn’t let social media impact how compelled i felt to go out or let myself feel guilty about lounging about in my dorm as i didn’t really know who i was yet in college let alone who was going to be my friend (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). i think the importance of the new york times article by emery bergmann goes way beyond just making friends in college as i believe it relates more to being comfortable with who you are, trusting that if you stay true to yourself, you will feel accomplished as well. aside from my younger brother, returning to puerto rico and returning to its community for a week helped fuel me for the second half of moreau this semester as well. as a guy who likes cars (even though the nickname my friends gave my car during high school was “la vaca” or cow in spanish due to the similarities in acceleration between them) and driving, i missed both of those things as i was unable to use my driver’s license in south bend. while fall break helped scratch that itch of driving, i was reminded of something as i took my stress relieving drives around the island: hurricane maria. despite puerto rico having essentially recuperated from hurricane maria, what remains are the bent over light posts, wooden electrical pools, and outside basketball courts with their roofs missing as no one bothered fixing them as they still did their job. what i remember the most from the hurricane was not watching the winds strong enough to flip cars or uproot trees, but the strength of the puerto rican community that came together to rebuild itself almost singlehandedly. many puerto ricans will never forget (nor probably forgive) the lackluster support from the united states to during the critical days after the hurricane. while there is no definite proof to saying that puerto rico was a ignored a bit by fema based on racial reasons, there is still concrete proof of the discrimination against puerto rico from the us itself; puerto rico has been systematically oppressed for decades, whether it is testing out agent orange in the jungles of puerto rico to not allowing puerto ricans to govern themselves until the 1960s. the utterly inadequate fema response to the hurricane maria crisis is only the latest of these cases. those scars of hurricane maria only helped remind me of the importance of critical race schooling, whether it is in catholic schools or not (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week 10). returning to puerto rico also meant going to mass with my parents again on sunday. my faith in general this semester, while i am still a faithful believer, i cannot lie but say that i have not been that responsible in going to mass on sundays in south bend. to me, going to mass was always a family event and it felt weird to go alone; it felt as if going without a concrete reason. this once “black and white” event in my ordinary life was now more complicated than ever before. ironically, this was one of the few of my actions that was directly impacted from moreau and not just a moreau analysis of my actions. week twelve of moreau is when i made this realization while reading the provided material for that week of class. it was the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis that i realized how the “law of undulation” was always something i’ve done outside of religious devotion and even primarily (and quite ironically) with my devotion to my gym routine. after a week of denying myself from the gym, of resting and living a life without putting strain on my body whether it be by benching or squatting, i return more invigorated than ever as i realized its importance not only making me physically better, but most importantly mentally better. while it is quite ironic and possibly even way to simple to compare religious devotion to something as frivolous as a workout split, it is just a simple way for me to describe how i trust that my hope in catholicism would help me grow to be a better person (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week 12). nguyen le kieu anh nguyen le andrew whittington moreau first year experience 15 oct., 2021 settling into newness 1. i believe that the community, as well as the individual, is responsible for creating a sense of belonging. when we arrived at college, achieving a sense of belonging was on all our minds. we wanted to feel at home in this new environment. during our first week of moreau, we watched dr. brown explain how “the people that have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). she believes that to achieve belonging, we must first change our perspective and be open-minded. we must be willing to be vulnerable. i only agree with this notion to an extent. i personally did not like how we started our course with this idea because it shifts the responsibility from the community onto the individual. i believe that there are many communities in which certain individuals will never be accepted no matter how much they feel they deserve to belong. i fear that this mindset allows a community to ignore the dicrimintive practices within itself and instead blame the individual for not feeling like they belong. that is why i believe that but the individual and the community should both be vulnerable. notre dame needs to be comfortable with having uncomfortable converstations about racism and especially classism within its student body. as a person of color from a low-income family, i will be vulnerable only if i know i am in a safe environment. there are many times during moreau in which i feel uncomfortable and do not want to give my input on something particularly when we are talking about racial or socioeconomic disparities because i have a feeling other students are not ready to hear what i have to say. of course, i believe i belong here, but that does not mean i am willing to be vulnerable in every space that calls me to be. 2. i believe that in order to grow, i must focus on my spiritual, mental, and physical health. one of my biggest regrets from high school was my hyper fixation on getting accepted to an “elite” college. i would neglect friendships, sleep, and my real passions just to make myself as attractive of applicant as possible. i believe this relates to the quote: “these two sides of our nature are at war with each other. we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i focused way too much on external successes. on the surface, it looked like i was doing well ⁠— i had perfect grades and great extracurriculars. in reality, i did not have many fulfilling friendships nor did i feel particularly passionate about many things i was studying. when i got to college, i realized that to be content with myself in the present, i need to focus on developing internal value. i interpret that as growing my faith, forming strong relationships, and following my passions. i would rather be described as kind than diligent or hardworking. additionally, i realized that sacrificing my physical health for external successes made for a horrible lifestyle. i have been trying to set limits for myself such as only studying for two hours at a time and going back to my dorm by at least midnight every night. i cannot say i have been successful during all eight weeks, but i am doing a lot better than i did in high school. 3. i believe my purpose is to be a disciple of god. during my last years of high school, i was not able to focus on my spiritual life as much as i had in the past. life got in the way and i felt like there were more immediate matters to take care of; however, i have come to realize that maintaining a good relationship with god is essential to livin a fulfilling life. david fagerberg explains that “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). if my goal is to follow the teachings of the church, i will be all the qualities that i admire most. life is not about getting external success ⁠— like we established in week two ⁠— but being the person that we want to be. 4. i believe that strong friendships not are a vital part of my life. one of my biggest worries about starting college was making friends. when the stress and pressure started increasing, i found it to be more difficult to manage because i did not have those established friendships like i did at home. i worried that people were forming friendships without me because i was so caught up in school and did not have time. that proved to not be the case because i had too much of an unrealistic expectation for friends. friendships take time to form and they “should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor ⁠— moreau fye week four). it does not make sense to just gravitate to random people for the sake of not being alone. i know that i value a few strong friendships more than i do many superficial ones. 5. i believe that notre dame is where i should be right now. there was a specific week in which i was constantly questioning whether i made the right choice to come here. i had a very long a conversation with a friend who was feeling the same kind of doubt. we came to the conclusion that although there were a lot of difficulties, many people have overcome the same challenges we did. i thought about the history of this school and how father sorin wrote: “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country, and, at the same time, will offer every year a most useful resource to the brothers'· novitiate; and once the sisters come-whose presence is so much desired herethey must be prepared, not merely for domestic work, but· also for teaching; and perhaps, too, the establishment of an academy” (“sorin letter to moreau” by fr. sorin ⁠— moreau fye week five). notre dame gives me so many amazing opportunities to do good. i want to take advantage of my time here. 6. i believe that my home and background will shape how i view everything. while writing my poem about my background, i realized how much of it informs how i see the world. i also realized how beautiful my story was. i am proud of everything i went through and everything my family went through to get me to this point. there are so many different stories here at notre dame and that is a good thing. i may miss being around similar people but interacting with different stories is how i can gain more perspective. i would not have learned this much about myself or about people if i had stayed in california. 7. i believe i pursue truth by questioning the past. david brooks critiques our understanding of history by saying: “part of the blame goes to conservatives who try to whitewash history. part goes to progressives who tell such a negative version of history that it destroys patriotism. but the core problem is our failure to understand what education is” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks ⁠— moreau fye week seven). i am so thankful for notre dame’s dedication to the pursuit of truth. i recognize that not everything they do can be perfect. the university is going to make mistakes, but it has also been making progress. there is no denying that nd’s history as a predominantly white institution informs much of how it interacts with its students today; however, i see progress being made. i am currently participating in a book club where we read braiding sweetgrass by robin wall kimmerer, a book about the potawatomi tribe’s methods of living harmoniously with the land. i have been so excited to read this book. i have resisted putting it in my backpack this whole week because i knew if i did, i would end up reading it instead of studying for midterms. i plan on reading this break because i think it is my responsibility to understand the history of the land i will be living on for the next four years. i am very thankful for notre dame organizing the bookclub or else i would have never known about braiding sweetgrass. week 8 integration pierpoint 1 professor retartha moreau 15 october 2021 why do my beliefs shape my journey through life? as marcus garvey, a jamaican political activist and journalist once wrote, “a people without the knowledge of their past history, origin, and culture is like a tree without roots'' (blackhistorymonth.org). every single experience, whether menial or pivotal, impacts who we are, how we behave, and what we believe in. our “past history” can unconsciously or consciously shape our personal development and our root beliefs. through my transformative high school experience and the start of my journey in college, i have reflected upon my past experiences and my future desires, and have formed my root beliefs. by understanding my personal root beliefs –– using my passions to find a meaningful profession that has the ability to change lives, living my life in the presence, feeling confident to become vulnerable in order to forge life-giving relationships, understanding the origin and importance of both the negative and positive stories and never surrendering no matter how enticing giving up may be –– i can better understand my identity and shape my life in a way that can aid in finding meaning and purpose. even though i have spent just a short amount of time at notre dame, i have understood that my passion for helping others can coincide with a career in medicine in order to help me live a life of meaning and purpose. after watching the ted talk in which brooks explains how a number of people unconsciously live for their resume instead of their eulogy impacted the way i began to think about my choices and my priorities. throughout high school, i focused on my external successes and accomplishments, specifically in regards to my academics or my pierpoint 2 performance on the tennis team. i became obsessed with adam one’s intentions and i connected my self worth with academic validation. looking back on it now, i wish i could have prioritized adam two’s goals and pursued more of my passions (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy by david brooks moreau fye week two). because of this recent realization, i am now committed to make a conscious effort at notre dame to pursue my passions and focus more on what will lead me to find authenticity and happiness. my mom has always told me that my most apparent personality trait is my “big heart.” through high school and the beginning of college, i have come to understand that she is correct. i care for my friends and family on a deeper level where i can feel their pain, their happiness, their discomfort. i believe that my purpose is to help others, whether that lies in the medical field or just volunteering my time to help those who are less fortunate. i find that i am most satisfied and fulfilled when i know that i have made a difference and an impact on that person’s day, week, life, etc. through this attribute of mine, i realized that a career in medicine will allow me to use my strengths of kindness, empathy, humility, and honesty, found through the via character strength survey (moreau fye week two), to find my full potential and help others recover theirs. in retrospect, my high school experience went by in a blink of an eye, and i wish i could have cherished more of the time that i spent doing the things that led me towards meaning. it is so incredibly easy to be focused on the future –– future problems, future goals, future relationships –– and to ignore what the present offers. while watching carla ann harris give her laetare medalist address, she mentioned how we should be intentional with our time and spend it in a way that we can get the largest return on our time (notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address by carla ann harris moreau fye week 5). time is something that i can never get back, so whenever i have the good moments, i should appreciate them, and https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=zh https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=zh https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 pierpoint 3 whenever i have the bad moments, i should appreciate their importance in actively shaping me. in order to obtain this “largest return on time,” i believe that i should spend it creating the stories that will help me find my meaning and purpose in life. in order to forge life-giving relationships, it is imperative to have the ability to lower your guard and become vulnerable with others and yourself. i find that i struggle to be vulnerable in front of others as our society has led us to believe that we are weak if we show any sign of weakness or emotion that is not happiness. during week 6 of moreau, we talked about the various influencing factors that have helped form our present self (“where i’m from” by ella lyon moreau fye week 6) and i wasn’t cognisant of the magnitude to which my family impacted who i am as a person today. i come from a family where hard work ethic and sacrifice is valued and complaining is rarely an option; this isn’t always necessarily a bad thing, but it has come to affect the way i handle my emotions and express them to others. ever since i was young, i struggled with expressing my emotions and unfortunately, this cycle continues. however, after listening to brené brown and her viewpoint on vulnerability, i recognize that i have to change the way i view my vulnerability: rather than perceiving vulnerability as a weakness, i need to embrace it as a key point to finding connection and meaningful relationships. i need to let go of who i think i should be, and accept who i am in order to have the most positive connections. dr. brown explains that people who have a strong sense of belonging and love are those who have the courage to be imperfect (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown -moreau fye week one). i believe that my fear of unworthiness or connection is simply the one ingredient that keeps me out of connection. i numb myself to the feeling of being vulnerable because i lack the courage to be imperfect. i believe that i can forge life-giving relationships by understanding that i am enough; once i can accept that i am perfectly imperfect, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 pierpoint 4 i can establish the confidence i need to feel vulnerable. becoming vulnerable is a new addition to my root beliefs because in order to have deep and meaningful relationships with others, there needs to be a sense of vulnerability in which we can trust one another. once this sense of vulnerability is established, i can understand the qualities of a healthy relationship using the “healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” pdf–– respect, honesty, equality –– so that i can maintain a beneficial relationship and differentiate those from the toxic traits (healthy vs. unhealthy relationships by the red flag campaign moreau fye week 4). opening up and surrendering to vulnerability will help to build these healthy attributes and form a stronger bond (one that could not be found without vulnerability) that will provide a deep satisfaction in life. our lives are defined by every single story and experience, both negative and positive, but in order to better understand ourselves, we need to understand how these stories play a role in our development as a person. as humans, it is only natural to focus on the negative aspects that develop our daily lives. it is easier to think of the worst because we can prepare ourselves for the possible outcomes, therefore it would make sense why people tend to focus more on and remember more of the negative experiences in our lives. but chimamanda ngozi adichie reminded me that to only focus on these negative stories is overlooking all of the other stories that have shaped who i am (the danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). i am not going to deny that my learning disorder or my struggle with anxiety has not shaped who i am but there have been so many amazing positive stories in my life: meeting my best friends, traveling the world and appreciating the world’s different cultures with my family, or growing up in a loving household that supports me. all of these stories have a significant impact on my maturation. both negative and positive stories morph me into the person i am today, but the negative stories don’t solely define me, and the positive stories don’t https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next pierpoint 5 solely define me, they contribute equally. but one thing has remained constant in regards to my stories, i have never surrendered. because of this, i have learned how to endure a variety of struggles and resist their influence in the formation of my stories. “hope is confident because it rests upon god’s power, not our own” (faith brings light to a dark world moreau fye week 3). this quote directly correlates to when i received my letter informing me that i was accepted into the gateway program. at first, i was disappointed, but now i can’t even imagine what it would be like to not be a part of this amazing program. i had hoped that my gateway experience would be positive and because of this hope, i accepted the program’s offer and jumped into an unknown abyss. now eight weeks into my gateway experience, i know that nd is going to write me a story that will dramatically shape who i am going to be in the future. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau what i have realized at notre dame. i think that one of the most important things that i have asked myself since my time at notre dame is my own personal identity concerning my religious beliefs. all my life i have grown up in a religious family, and while i had attended public school, it was still normal for me to go to church every single weekend. now that i am in college all by myself, it is up to me to decide everything regarding religion for myself. something that has come of this is where i can connect my beliefs of the reasons for things happening in the world. there are many people in the world who believe that this hope and these ideas come from religious, who “firmly believed the lord’s choicest blessings come through the crosses we bear out of love for him and love for others.” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week 12). this idea of connecting religious aspects to my life is something i have really thought about since i have come here. i am no longer required to go to mass by anyone, as i am not living with my parents anymore. it is completely up to me to choose whether or not religion is something that i will continue to follow or not. understanding that it is now up to me to make these decisions is one of the largest areas of growth that i have experienced in my time here. another thing that has really changed since i came to school here was my own view of my own responsibilities and work. i grew up in a situation where there were always very high expectations placed upon me, from parents and my school as well, going to a very competitive high school. something that i feel like i experienced since i have come here is that pressure that i have felt to be perfect with everything regarding school has significantly decreased. while school is of course still important, the more i spend time here, the more i realize that it should not be the most important thing in my life at all times, like it was previously in my life. julia hogan explains this well in her article about these sorts of expectations, saying how “i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary.” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). people have always placed these arbitrary expectations on my throughout my life, always expecting me to meet them without fail. now that i am by myself, and have spent some time living by myself, i start to realize how those expectations should instead by goals set by myself, ones which i think i can achieve, not ones that are set by other people. it is very nice to have that pressure removed from my life, and i feel like it has led me to grow as a more well-rounded person as a result. i have started doing activities not because i am forced to or required to, but instead because i simply enjoy them. i choose to do them on my own, which makes it much more enjoyable. another big thing is the fact that i have now gotten to live in a completely different area, with completely different people than what i have experienced before. growing up in the same place my entire life, i never got to see much of the experiences of those from outside of my area, because that was where i had been my entire life. coming here, to notre dame, there are people coming from all sorts of different backgrounds, from all sorts of different places all over the world. learning about these experiences gives me a different view of communities, as i have been in one main community my whole life. i have learned that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” ("thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). it is important to realize that being in one of these very diverse communities is helpful for personal growth, as it gives me the ability to see perspectives from people i may not have had the opportunity to see before, after growing up in the place i did. the value of the community has become clear to me through the fact that i know that what i have experienced here has changed me as a person and made me a different person, because of the fact that i have been able to experience a much different sense of community. i think something that has been revealed to me since coming here was the importance of making valuable relationships with other people. in high school, i was pretty introverted, so i tended to not care about spending time and doing things with other people. coming here however, that completely changed. it became clear to me how important it is to spend time with other people in order to build valuable relationships and friendships. coming here i have already made a lot of friends, something i struggled with a lot previously in my life. in addition, it has become clear how helpful it is to just have people that you can trust and rely on for when you need help with something in your life. it has become clear that “love is the deepest human need. each human being has a deep spiritual, psychological, emotional longing for love.” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). fr. jenkins says it pretty well, how i have realized that this fact is true. love for me comes from the understanding that i have people who i have built close relationships with, and that i can rely on them if i must. the biggest change for me of all since coming to school was my realization of how crucial it is to make and maintain these relationships, as they make me a happier person overall. integrationsantiago jazmin inner peace and experience my beliefs have usually been pretty static throughout my life. usually, they are impacted by the people around me and my experiences while growing up. although i don’t expect to change my beliefs in the future (i cannot predict this 100%), my experiences in college and in the workforce should continue to build on and reinforce my current beliefs. i believe that i am responsible for myself and my actions in school, at home, and within my community. my parents raised me to value self ownership and to shape my actions around their respective consequences. something that has changed, however, is that my parents used to guide me in my decision-making. now that i am away from home, i have more authority over what i do and how i live my life. i know that i will inevitably make plenty of mistakes, but i can’t wait to learn from them and do better. i believe that i grow by building on my previous experiences and by being more vulnerable with myself about my own weaknesses. i think that it is especially important to remember that there are resources i can reach out to when i need help. previously, i had issues with being vulnerable (and to an extent i still do), but during moreau, one of the main things that stuck with me was, “vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, and love.” 1 for this reason, i am more willing to experiment with vulnerability in my life. in terms of building on previous experiences, i think it is important to learn from failure and not view it so negatively. for example, i have gotten pretty sick during my time here. i think this is because i did not eat or sleep enough and i learned my lesson the hard way. i plan on using fall break to catch up on rest and eat good food, and then i plan on changing my habits when i come back. this made me think about week two in our classes. “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses.” 2 although i need to focus on my weaknesses, i think it is important to build upon my existing strengths and take advantage of being able to nap anytime and anywhere in order to catch up on sleep when i need to. i believe that i am searching for experiences that will help me grow through exposure to the world. i am also searching for people that i can depend on and also help. lastly, i believe that i am searching for inner peace. i have always wanted to travel the world and i have a great love of learning (especially by experience). i think that i am sure to meet people that i can form long lasting relationships with 2 https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim david brooks, “live for resume or eulogy?” (week 2) 1 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 brene brown, “power of vulnerability” (week 1) https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 while traveling. that being said, i think it is important to avoid toxicity in these relationships and i thus found this quote to be useful: “beware of the friend who says they hate drama. unfortunately, this is the friend who actually loves drama and frequently finds themselves in the center of it.” 3 i think that being involved in needless drama is not a very good thing, so i will definitely keep this in mind when meeting a lot of people (while maintaining respect and decency of course). one of the main reasons i came to notre dame was actually to find inner peace. when i visited campus for the first time during my sophomore year, everyone i met seemed very friendly, welcoming, and calm while going about their everyday lives. “their very voices and faces are different from ours; stronger, quieter, happier, more radiant.” 4 this quote accurately describes how i viewed the students at notre dame, and this is what i aspire to achieve by the time i graduate. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by respecting others and finding people with common values and aspirations. i must be open to meeting new people and recognizing when relationships aren’t going too well. i think that if i end up traveling, i will meet a lot of people that are different from me. it is therefore important to keep in mind that stereotyping is common and i will likely engage in bias and be on the receiving end as well until i can gather enough information to form more accurate conclusions about groups of people. this is what i learned from the following quote: “if you are like most people, it happens all the time [bias]. that doesn’t make you a racist, sexist, or whatever-ist. it just means that your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations.” 5 so far, i have met a lot of people at notre dame because there are students from all over the country and world. i have become friends with people who were raised completely different from me but generally have similar values. i am excited to get to know more people during my time here. lastly, i believe that my community should help everyone grow and contribute to the upbringing of others. a community should be welcoming and make me feel like i am at home. throughout my life, i have been a part of many different communities, and these are the traits that i’ve enjoyed the most. so far, my experiences at notre dame have aligned with these traits that i look for in a community. everyone is friendly and welcoming, and although our values are not exactly the same, we all have an inclination toward service and doing good. for this reason, i was fascinated by the story of the school’s founding, and this is what stuck 5 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ payne, doris, niemi, “how to think about bias” (week 7) 4 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&ut m_medium=class&utm_id=moreau david fagerberg, “faith brings light to a dark world” (week 3) 3 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ olivia taylor, “signs of toxic friendship” (week 4) https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ with me the most: “the lake, particularly, appeared so beautiful. this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country.” 6 during my time here at notre dame, i want to continue exploring my beliefs and see how my experiences will further reinforce them. i look forward to meeting new people, having new experiences, and keeping an open mind to anything that comes my way. 6 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view fr. sorin, “letter to bl. basil moreau” (week 5) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view --moreau fye--integration 1 richardson 1 professor taylor fys 10101-31 12 october 2021 who i was, who i am, and who i will be throughout the moreau first year experience thus far, i have had much time for reflection and self-discovery. this has come in the form of writing qqc reflections but also in listening to my peers’ beliefs in class and having discussions with them about our beliefs. moreau has been an enriching experience that i have been so grateful to have. it is a time where i can reflect upon who i am and who i want to be. i look forward to discovering more about myself in the rest of the course, as i still have much to learn. in the last two months, however, i have identified or reaffirmed several root beliefs that i hold dearly. i believe that i am searching for my purpose in life. i know i am meant to serve god and help others, but i am searching for the best way to do so. like david brooks discusses in his ted talk “should you live for your résumé … or your eulogy?”, it is more important to focus on the kind of person you are rather than what you have achieved in life (“should you live for your résumé … or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). ultimately, the world remembers people more for the kind of people they were rather than what they accomplished during their lives. i want to be remembered as someone who was a faithful servant of god and also as someone who always tried her best to help others and who made a positive impact upon others’ lives. this desire stems from my christian faith but also from the joy i receive from making others’ lives better. this joy i have in helping others is a large part of why i want to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim richardson 2 pursue a career in medicine where i can hopefully conduct research but also be deeply involved in patient care. i would also love to host free clinic days as a doctor to help those who do not otherwise have access to affordable, quality healthcare. in improving others’ lives, i serve others and god, which is ultimately at the heart of all i hope to do in life. this path is not always an easy one to walk. sometimes, it is difficult to tell how i am meant to help someone or if i even can help someone. i also sometimes fail to help someone when i should due to short-sightedness. it is more difficult to see how i can serve someone else when i myself am struggling in some facet of my life. however, i have also learned that by leaning on others and allowing them to lean on you, whatever burden you might be carrying can be made lighter. this is true of my faith, in which i trust god and offer up my struggles to god. god is always present in everyone’s lives. he never abandons us. even though it might feel like we are alone, we never are. this sentiment was shared by nyah, a notre dame student in “student reflections on faith,” and when i read her description of this sentiment, i instantly resonated with it and recognized its truthfulness in my own life (“student reflections on faith” curated by campus ministry moreau fye week three). also, i know that there is a lesson to be learned in every struggle and that i can improve myself through withstanding each obstacle, as reflected by carla harris in her laetere medalist address (“2021 laetere medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). god has a plan for each of us, and even though that plan will not be devoid of struggles, if i remain open to the lessons god intends to teach me through each obstacle and not only help others but also lean on others when i am struggling, i can build my character, strengthen my faith in god, and learn how to better serve others in the future. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 richardson 3 i believe that i am responsible for my actions, which include helping others and trying my best in all that i do. as mentioned in the video “it’s on us ndthe three d’s of being an active bystander,” we all have a responsibility to help others when we see them struggling (“it’s on us ndthe three d’s of being an active bystander” by the gender studies program at the university of notre dame moreau fye week four). whether people are being bothered by others or they are struggling to understand class concepts, we have a responsibility to help them in any way we can. if someone is bothering someone else, we can intervene by being an active bystander. this does not mean we must be confrontational. in fact, we can intervene peacefully without drawing more attention to the situation, which is sometimes best. we must do something, though, instead of leaving someone alone or to fend for themselves when someone is bothering them or making them feel unsafe. also, if someone is struggling to understand class concepts, we should offer to help them if we have a stronger understanding of the material. already, some friends of mine have struggled to understand certain concepts from our chemistry class, but i have offered to help them with the material. i have spent time with them answering their questions and helping them feel more competent with the subject. this is not only helpful to them but is also helpful to me because in teaching the material, i understand it better, too. i helped others in this way in high school and have been blessed not only with my understanding of difficult material but also in my ability to help others understand it. i believe that we all have a duty to use our god-given abilities and gifts to serve others and that i can do so by using my understanding of certain concepts to help others understand them. i enjoy helping others in this way. also, in trying my best in all that i do, including in my schoolwork and helping others, i feel i am taking responsibility for my education and also for my actions as someone who desires https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view richardson 4 to serve god and others above all else. it is difficult when i myself do not understand class material at times and therefore cannot help others understand it. also, sometimes, i am stressed with my own work that i must complete so that when others ask me for help i feel that i am unable to help them because i have too much work of my own to do. however, i have found that i always have time to answer a question or two, and even if i cannot spend much time helping someone, helping in little ways is still meaningful and better than if i had not helped at all. even if it is in small ways, helping others makes a positive impact on their lives and on my own life. i plan to continue trying to help others in any way i can in the future, even if i am only capable of doing so in a small way at the time, because any act of service is meaningful and impactful. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being honest and vulnerable with others. like brené brown discussed in her ted talk “the power of vulnerability,” we must be our true, authentic selves in order to form deep relationships (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). if we cannot be honest with others, we cannot be ourselves, which means we will not be able to form satisfying relationships. in order to form solid and satisfying relationships with others, we must be willing to be open and honest with them, but we must also be honest with ourselves. being honest with ourselves requires time spent reflecting upon our beliefs, feelings, and attitudes. we must be patient with ourselves as we discern who we are, what we want from life, and what we are meant to do. exercises such as writing a “where i’m from” poem similar to the one george ella lyon wrote allow us to be introspective and to examine our own backgrounds and beliefs (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). the closest and most rewarding relationships in my life have been ones built upon honesty and authenticity. if i have felt that i could not be myself around a person or be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html richardson 5 authentic around that person, the relationship has often either not worked out well or not been a strong relationship that i have wanted to keep in my life or put much time into nurturing. therefore, i always try to be honest with others so i can develop stronger relationships with them. i also try to be honest with myself so i can be true to myself and therefore be more honest with others and have better relationships with them. it is scary being completely honest and vulnerable with myself or others sometimes. however, even though it is frightening being vulnerable and having difficult conversations, it is ultimately worth it because it leads to greater openness and authenticity in a relationship. it allows trust to be built so the relationship can strengthen and flourish. i still struggle with being vulnerable with others, but i am making more of an effort to do so and have already had more opportunities to be honest and authentic with others at the university of notre dame as i have developed friendships with others, including people in my dorm (badin hall) and in my classes. i feel that i am able to be my true self here at notre dame, and because of this, i am very happy here. i believe that i grow by listening to others’ perspectives and incorporating them with my own beliefs. i believe that i pursue truth by listening to others’ stories, perspectives, and beliefs. by listening to others, i can learn about other perspectives besides my own. i believe that everyone has a fascinating story to tell and that i can learn something from everyone. already, in my time here at notre dame, i have gotten to meet so many interesting people from across the globe--whether they live an hour away from my hometown or are from a country that is on the other side of the planet. i have learned something from each person i have encountered, and i look forward to learning more from others in the future. coming to college, one of the things about which i was most excited was getting to meet new people from around the country and richardson 6 world and getting to hear about their lives and beliefs. i have been pleased to find that while we have had our differences, culturally and belief-wise, we have had more in common than not. if we are willing to listen to others, we can not only learn something new about the world and ourselves and expand our own perspectives and beliefs, but we can also find common ground with others. if people were more willing to listen to others in today’s world, i believe the world would be a better place and that governments would be better able to affect positive and effective changes. it is important to listen to numerous perspectives because it is impossible for one story to summarize everyone in a certain group’s experiences. as chimamanda ngozi adichie stated in her ted talk “danger of a single story,” to gain a more complete picture of a particular group of people (whether that is defined by geography, culture, or another determining factor), we must listen to numerous perspectives and stories from that group to gain a fuller understanding of the group (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this is especially important in government, where policies are created to help certain groups of people but might not take into account everyone’s perspectives within that group and therefore might cause much unintended harm to that group. personally, i know that in listening to and conversing with others, i have learned more about certain cultures and places than i ever could in a classroom setting. being at university is more than learning within the classroom; it is about living with others and engaging in conversations with them about our lives, beliefs, and passions. in doing so, we can learn more about the world and our place in it and we can examine our own beliefs and preconceived notions that might be challenged by these new perspectives. sometimes, these conversations are uncomfortable ones, but they are necessary to our personal growth and so that we might understand the struggles that people who are different from us face. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story richardson 7 in doing so, we can better serve others. i hope to continue to have interesting conversations with others and to learn how to serve them more effectively so i can better help others in the future. during my time in the moreau first year experience course thus far, i have learned much about myself and others. whether it has been through the weekly qqc reflections or through weekly class discussions, this has been a time of great self-reflection and self-discovery in addition to being a fantastic time of learning about others and their backgrounds, beliefs, and perspectives. i have greatly enjoyed this class and the self-awareness and global awareness it has brought me and look forward to gaining a greater sense of these during the rest of this course. professor hnatusko moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 finding the balance: navigating and welcoming new experiences at notre dame i believe that through being a vulnerable and loving friend, i bring my best to the community. i always thought that being vulnerable was a negative thing. in middle school and the early years of high school, i was painfully shy, always reading quietly and keeping to myself. when i finally opened up to my teachers and friends, i realized how much everyone appreciated getting to know me -the unapologetic version of myself. i became vulnerable, and though vulnerability often receives a negative connotation, brene brown discusses it in a positive light: “they just talked about [vulnerability] being necessary. they talked about the willingness to say ‘i love you’ first. the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). like brown says, i realized that by being vulnerable, i allowed other people to open up and feel more comfortable in this new environment at notre dame. for example, my family and i always tell each other that we value, appreciate, and love each other before hanging up the phone. when two of my close friends created an imessage group chat, i began to give them random messages of appreciation, telling them how much they had influenced me in the short time that i had known them and how much i appreciated them for being my friend. not only did it make them feel good about themselves, but it brought us closer together and allowed us all to open up to each other in times of struggle and stress. through being loving, i help reduce competition and stress amongst my peers at notre dame. to be a devoted, caring steward of the earth, i have to channel the ‘adam ii’ side of my desires, the side that “wants not only to do good but to be good, to live in a way internally that honors god, creation, and our possibilities” (“should you live for your resumé...or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). an example that reminds me of this ‘adam ii’ side is keeping my competitiveness and love for “bragging rights” out of the classroom and towards the intramural and club sports i partake in. in the classroom, i do my best to help classmates, peers, and friends in my residence hall who are struggling in the class, especially if i am confident in the material. a few weeks ago, i had my first midterm in principles of microeconomics, a subject that i am very familiar with, given that i had experience with a micro class in high school. hence, i did well on the exam, but my roommate did not get the same result. she was upset, but i worked with her when we both found time over the next week or so, going over the problems that she missed on the exam. she felt comfortable in the material and gave back to me when she edited my first literature paper that i was stressing about. at notre dame, it is essential to maintain a helpful, comfortable environment so that everyone can learn and participate confidently. being a loving person involves having a positive attitude even when times are tough; after all, how can you love others if you are angry or down at yourself? being almost seven hundred miles from my loved ones, from delicious jersey bagels and pizza, and from everything that provided me comfort for the last eighteen years isn’t easy. i’ll admit, coming to notre dame was not the smooth transition that i thought it would be; after all, it was my dream school for many years. i found myself homesick constantly for the first few weeks, but i maintained hope, “the confidence that we are moving toward light, not darkness; joy, not sorrow; life, not death” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). through telling myself that there were better days ahead, that i would eventually meet my group of people, and that tackling the heavy workload would get easier, i was able to persevere through the rocky beginning weeks. because i maintained a sunny disposition, i eventually did find some lovely friends, and, with many facetime calls back home and nights spent laughing and studying with my newfound friends, i was able to find a balance between life in new jersey and life in indiana. i believe that in my first two months at notre dame, i have learned that enjoying the little things in life will make the biggest difference. i have always enjoyed talking about myself; i value hearing that other people find me to be a funny or interesting person. however, in all of the time i spend talking to others, sometimes i would forget to listen. upon coming to notre dame, i learned that “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). in high school, i was involved in many clubs and extracurricular activities, but here at notre dame, i took it a step further and would genuinely make an effort to get to know the people involved in the clubs outside of what the club was talking about. within my sibc group, i conversed with fellow freshmen about their hometowns and families and what made them choose notre dame. i saw them as fellow bank project partners, but i also learned that andrew has a golden doodle named arthur at home and that emma went to california to spend time helping out on her grandparents’ farm. through these interactions, great conversations were sparked, and, even better, lifelong friendships were formed. already in my two months here at notre dame, i have had the privilege of speaking with many alumni. though they all have different backgrounds, their advice for us remains the same: “make the most of your experience, it flies by.” through their words of wisdom and encouragement, i have learned the importance of time: “while we can all get more money, more houses, cars, and things, we can never get more time. we should therefore be extremely intentional with our time” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). because some days can be very stressful, i have begun to genuinely appreciate the smallest things about life: seeing a squirrel do something funny on my way to class, walks to the grotto in the evenings when the sun hits the lake at just the right time, turning my head to look at the beauty of the dome when i walk across the main circle, and, of course, southwest salads at the dining hall on thursdays. though especially now, as i type this, it is so easy to look forward to the incoming fall break, i know that my future self will thank me for appreciating the small beauties of every day. i believe that by commemorating my past experiences with new ones, i will write a new chapter in my book. when i get homesick, i miss my parents or my siblings, my high school friends, or my car most of the time. but sometimes, it is the littlest things that i miss the most: the fabric of my uniform skirt, the creaking of the floorboards when i would come down the steps every morning, the way the sunlight would pour through the windows of my bedroom. george ella lyon touches on this in his poem where i’m from: “i am from the forsythia bush, the dutch elm whose long-gone limbs i remember as if they were my own” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). i, too, have my form of a dutch elm back home: an apple tree that sat behind my childhood playset. both are now long gone, falling victim, respectively, to a hurricane and my siblings and me growing up. now that i am so far away, i think about this tree and my playset quite often. they may be physically gone, but they will always exist in my heart. i can commemorate them with new experiences at notre dame. i can use stories and experiences from my childhood to shape the rest of my four years here at notre dame and begin to shape whom i want to become in the professional world. after all, “like our economic and political worlds, stories too are defined by the principle of nkali: how they are told, who tells them, when they’re told, how many stories are told, are really dependent on power” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). through my past experiences, like being on the swim team every year since i was six years old and founding my high school’s history club, i joined the club swim team at notre dame and hope to explore some of the university’s archives at hesburgh when i get back after fall break. through these new experiences, i gain new stories and perspectives and send an ode to my younger self in the process. overall, my first few months at notre dame have been incredibly enriching and insightful. i have already grown not only academically but spiritually and as a person as a whole. i cannot wait to see the joys and blessings that the next few years will bring to me and my loved ones here at this beautiful university. moreau fye as a guide to life the revised and expanded mission statement (moreau fye week 13) my mission, above all else, is to learn. at the core of my goals is that singular concept. my aspirations to be a doctor, my interests in leadership, my own introspection and my wildest dream of becoming a bodybuilder all include it. ironically, the way i find myself curious in each is different. for example, i ask a ton of “why” questions in medicine, but i refuse to ask those same questions in introspection “why questions stir up negative emotions; what questions keep us curious,” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this difference in attaining knowledge is something learned through error more on that later. learning is something that i do in class, out of class, at work, in my free time, with friends, and every other situation that i find myself in, and i would not have it any other way. one of my distinctive goals in this mission is to additionally share this learned knowledge with others; whether it be as a doctor or as a sunday school teacher. the onset of new knowledge requires me to constantly search and try out ideas that may fail . i see this short-term failure as a long-term success: i do not want to die with the possibility that some idea that i had could have become something bigger. i would rather fail and find success through it, than never try and live a content, yet boring life. i found through this course that i share the same mindset as father hesburgh, who is quoted as saying “i decided if i was going to be president, i was going to shake things up,” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). trying new things is something that i never grow tired of, and i find my mind wandering to new hobbies and experiences frequently. thus, my personality shapes my mission as well, since it draws me towards the knowledge that i so seek. i also pride myself on knowing my own limits. as i take on new roles, new subjects, or new people in my life, i always know when and where to stop. this does not cease my learning, as i used to think, but instead allows me to adjust and learn at the optimum level for all of the new concepts. although i tend to overload myself with roles due to my love of involvement in order to meet people and learn new skills (keenan senator, spirit commissioner, and b+ captain), i still know how to balance it all. one of my favorite activities that i did this semester to engage with others and learn new perspectives was the event “back the bend.” it demonstrated to me the term we learned in class “accompaniment.” quoting directly from professor steve reifenberg, “to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard,” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). in this event, i helped a farm that gives back to the local community at free or reduced costs to prepare for the summer growing season. the outcome was amazing we performed a whole month of work in 4 hours! their sincere gratitude and honest personalities gave me a lot of insight into my own personality and made me a lot more thankful for my things than i already was. it also reinforced a quote from this semester “bridging the gulf of moral judgment and replacing it with kinship is tricky indeed” since we were working in what was called “a bad area of town” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr greg boyle moreau fye week 7). however, the people were lovely! the stereotype that poor neighborhoods contain strictly criminals is a harmful and irrational one that must be put to rest. if we extend the hand of kinship, we remove the barrier of violence. going to a university with such a compassionate student body, however, one thing i do keep in mind is this: the aim is always to enjoy the act of learning, not burden myself with it. an idea i always keep in mind is this: someone can love water so much that they can drown. i should not overburden with cool and unique opportunities because there are far too many for one person. i was born a student, and i intend on being one for the rest of my waking years. the application i truly mean it when i say that my mission statement came from the heart. i want to learn as much as i can during my finite time on earth because it fulfills me. when i was much younger, like many notre dame students, learning was easy. however, coming to college, i’ve learned that i am not naturally good at certain subjects (shoutout to philosophy). this does not stop me, however, as i discussed: i use failure as motivation to move forward. if i feared failure, i could never participate in my favorite quote from this semester: “just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). this determination to experience life is something that others have noticed around me as well. in my clubs, classes, and friend groups, i always find myself as the one people go to when they need help either in the subject or in finding motivation. i’m even a personal trainer, where one of the main job requirements is being able to motivate others. my mom put it well, when she said this about me: “at home, i’ve seen that success drives you and when you get challenged you become determined to exceed the challenge until you are satisfied,” (interview with my mom moreau fye week 5). the knowledge i seek is not surface level, however. when many people seek knowledge, they become “encyclopedias” of sorts with random facts and no understanding. this was briefly discussed in a podcast this semester, when the commentators said, “they’re not trying to empower…they’re really just learning to engage in a frivolous way,” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). the people they are discussing are the general americans in politics who simply just learn a few facts and try to engage in discussion, which only leads to issues due to a lack of understanding on both sides. i do not seek to know everything, as i instead seek to know everything that i find interesting or useful, and i believe that everyone should do this in order to determine their future career. one issue i find, however, is that i tend to utilize technology more than others around me for knowledge. this can lead to a depersonalization of information and can make me forget that other people, especially those at notre dame, have dedicated their lives to their interest and are much more knowledgeable than an online discussion. the quote that made me realize this occurred this semester was, “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length…so that i can more easily remember who i am,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). absorbing social media instead of spending time with family and friends is no way to go through life, and it is definitely not a way to find oneself. i truly believe that although we have more information at our fingertips, we are losing the information accessible about outside things and ourselves as we continue to improve technologically. this is why i try to limit my social media consumption, as i tend to forget who i really am and sometimes regret the things i do on there because they do not reflect me as a person. my catholicism factors heavily into the last portion of my mission statement, which is about acceptance and breaking barriers. this is not due to my religion per se, but rather how my religion has inspired me to believe in the need to befriend all backgrounds of people. one quote from this semester that demonstrates this idea was “god doesn’t make shit,” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). this quote was said by a priest, which makes it an even better quote, but it also demonstrates a key idea that all catholics should hold: everyone is in god’s plan. god loves us all, no matter our mistakes, and we need to demonstrate that we want to be loved by him because we love him too. he will show his love to anyone, that's the central christian belief. another, albeit less vulgar, quote demonstrating how my catholic belief factors into acceptance is “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people,” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week 12). this, more straightforward line, meant a lot to me because it was said by the university itself. i just really get proud seeing this stuff in the college’s statements, even if not everyone abides by it. the catholic teachings of this university cannot be disputed, however, as being of inclusivity. above nothing else, notre dame’s stance on inclusivity is one of embracing all people. it is a community that i can be proud that i am engaged in, and it is a community that furthers my own missions. i want to end this final integration by reflecting on the third integration (week 8). the topic was strange a eulogy and at the time i did not understand why we did that. i wrote about messages that i wanted to leave behind (self-reflection, connections, and curiosity) if i were to die and i think that i started to understand the assignment as i finished. after finishing the semester, however, i got it: we needed to reflect on the end goal to realize our current means to achieve it. if we want to write a good eulogy, and leave behind inspiring messages, we need to be able to find the way to get there. that idea concurs with something that i mentioned prior to this section: i want to explore life in this finite lifespan that i have been granted. i want to go out and explore. i want to learn. there is only one quote that i could possibly end this integration on, and it truly did speak to me the week we had it in class. in addition, death is a really polarizing subject that i believe should not be. i feel like a lot of people cannot talk about death due to feeling unfinished in life, but instead i find death to be a reminder to feel fulfilled every day that you live. after all, all we can do is: “memento mori”[footnoteref:0] [0: (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by the new york times moreau fye week 3)] week 8integration one beautiful belief i believe that i am searching for deep relationships based on vulnerability. i believe that i am searching for relationships with people with the same values as myself. i believe that faith is a process and that it must be prioritized in order to grow i believe healthy relationships are built on equality and a common concern for the other person i believe that setting high expectations for yourself is important for growth i believe it’s important to remember your past, but also realize when it is time to move on i believe that true intellectual growth comes through challenge and engagement with ideas i disagree with one of the most important core beliefs that i hold is that deep relationships are based on trust and vulnerability. our ability to express our true feelings to others is what truly binds us to those around us. although this is one of my core beliefs now, i did not always believe this. when this topic was first introduced in moreau, i actually completely disagreed. however, we were encouraged by the readings to go back and determine how our past relationships were built. when i looked back, i realized that the moment that sparked my most important relationship was when i revealed, to a very distant friend at that point, that i had been rejected from the nd scholars program. i was even further challenged when listening to dr. brown’s talk when she revealed that “my mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live is with vulnerability and to stop controlling and predicting” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). as someone who always tried to control my relationships, this was really moving in how it's more important to let go of that controlling nature. another aspect that i believe has been vital to the success of many of my important relationships is a shared sense of values. coming from a catholic background, finding people who share my same beliefs and can support my faith has always been very important to me. one of the aspects that has bonded some of my friends and i is when “faith serves as a stabilizer and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkv0bwspfow&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 a constant in a life that may otherwise be disorienting or overwhelming”(“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by leo class of 2022 moreau fye week three). this quote from a notre dame student on their faith experience i think really captures one of my core values that i look for in other people. i think it’s important to have this shared belief in the consistency in faith as it leads to the shared development of not only myself but also my friends. moreover, i believe that a sense of equality between two people is essential for healthy and mutually beneficial relationships. unfortunately, this belief has been formed by bad experiences in relationships with people in high school. looking back however, i am glad that i am able to recognize this need for equality in my relationships and set it as a standard for my new friends. as mentioned in week four of moreau “endlessly venting about work, other friends, family, relationships, or life in general could indicate that your friendship is not balanced…” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) i know now that being able to identify and avoid toxic traits can help me to form stronger relationships based on equality. when someone simply uses you as an outlet, there is a mismatch in the purpose of the relationship and i know now that these types of relationships are unhealthy. apart from my relationship with those around me, i also have very central beliefs about self improvement and development. i think the most important lesson that i’ve learned about my own personal growth is that i need to actively engage with things that i may disagree with or that i may not want to. one example of this would be in high school debates, i would often take the side of the debate that i disagreed with so that it would force me to research the other side and understand the problem more fully. during week two we discussed the development of the two adams within ourselves. one of the comments that really resonated with me was, “you [must] find the sin which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ which the others emerge” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). for me, admitting when i’m wrong, or in this case, a place in my life where i struggle and fail often, is not an easy task. however, my natural tendency to avoid confronting where i struggle, similar to resisting vulnerability, is what holds me back. in order to grow it is important to engage and recognize where you fail in order to fix those mistakes and grow. another text that spoke to this belief was in week 7 where payne described, “it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair”(“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau week seven). during week seven, i focused on the idea that oftentimes we act on unconscious biases and as a result we have no idea that we are acting unfairly. as a result, we have to challenge ourselves to accept that we have these hidden biases although we can’t see them so that we can resolve them. although it might be difficult to accept this challenge, because we do not believe that we have these biases, it is a necessary thing to confront in order to grow. in addition, i also believe that setting high standards for yourself is also very important to personal growth. from a young age my parents taught me to set high standards for myself when there was something that i wanted. this lesson did not really affect me until i got into high school and my application to notre dame got closer. i realized that if i wanted to get into my top college, i could not be complacent. as a result, i set my standards for my grades and my everyday activities very high. i created a clear goal for myself to get into my top college. i saw a lot of parallels between this belief and father sorin’s vision for notre dame during week five. one of the quotes that stood out was father sorin’s mission to make this college “one of the most https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ powerful means of doing good in this country…”(“letter to father general moreau” by fr. edward sorin moreau fye week five). although i believe that it is important to have values and standards that guide my day to day life, i also believe our perception and acknowledgement of our past is incredibly important. during week 7 we discussed the importance of the influences in our past, from our parents to the experiences that we had as kids. instead of writing the normal qqc, we were able to write poems instead which has always been a form of catharsis for me. as described by george lyon, “i believe that's what we're doing when we write or dance, sing or draw or practice any of the arts: we're listening to our hearts and expressing what we hear” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). throughout high school, poetry gave me an outlet and an opportunity to reflect on my past. it always seemed that when writing poetry, it allowed me to open up and uncover the positive and negative factors that were influencing my present. it was through this artform that i began to realize the importance of the past but also the need to move on from our past. i found out that looking towards my past can help settle me as it served as a base, but constant reflection on the past was dangerous because it prevented further growth. through this process, i discovered that although the past is important, it is more important to reflect on the past and learn from the lessons you have learned to move forward. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html w13 integration nguyen le 1 kieu anh nguyen le andrew whittington moreau first year experience november 28, 2021 navigating college through street-art, sweetgrass, and self-reflection as my first semester wraps up, i am surprised by how much my thinking has changed and evolved over these short three months. i have so many fascinating memories to unpack and reflect upon. i have encountered unique discomforts and challenges i never thought i would experience and i have resolved to respond to them with compassion, understanding, and kindness. when i found out i would be attending notre dame, i knew i could no longer expect to be at the top of the class and i thought i had prepared myself for this, but i did not realize how intensely imposter syndrome would settle down on me. elizabeth cox explains: "people who are highly skilled or accomplished tend to think others are just as skilled. this can spiral into feeling that they don't deserve opportunities or accolades over other people" ("what is imposter syndrome" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). going to an "elite" university almost guarantees feelings of imposter syndrome. there have been times when i look at the accomplishments of my peers and wondered if the biggest factor in my admissions was the fact that i went to a title i school. i know colleges do not have access to income information when admitting students, but i also know that they have information about what types of high schools we went to. when i was struggling with schoolwork towards the beginning of the semester, i questioned whether i was admitted just to "diversify" notre dame. i did not have the national titles or awards that my friends did. i could barely manage my schoolwork while they were doing that on top of many mailto:whittington@nd.edu 2 extracurriculars. i kept thinking that if someone else had my spot, they could be making so much more of the opportunities notre dame provides. this destructive mindset boggled me down for weeks until i had a conversation with one of my friends. he was someone who i had compared myself with endlessly as i watched him breeze through homework and exams. i was shocked when he said he is afraid to ask questions in his class because he has been terrified of seeming dumb. cox is right in believing that the best way to combat imposter syndrome was to talk about it. the change in perspective did not happen immediately after this conversation. it has been a slow and gradual process. i still over criticize myself from time to time but these moments of doubt have been less frequent. i try to treat myself with kindness and look at things from a larger perspective. a bad grade does not mean i do not deserve to be here. it means i can do better on the next exam if i identify how i can improve from this one. i know i deserve to be and belong at notre dame. as i was getting better at understanding why i was a good fit at notre dame, i was also starting to see why notre dame was a good fit for me and the biggest reason was because of its emphasis on community. this idea is perfectly summed up in both my appalachia immersion and in the article, "thirteen ways of looking at community." palmer writes: "contrary to popular opinion, community requires leadership, and it requires more leadership, not less, than bureaucracies." ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). during the immersion, our group stayed in a catholic worker house that abided by the catholic social teachings (cst). despite growing up catholic, i had never heard about cst before coming to notre dame and i found myself very intrigued by the catholic workers' aversion to structured bureaucracies especially when applied to service. the work being performed was personal. it was done through a faceless, bureaucratic organization. community 3 members were able to speak to real people who listened to their stories and hardships. this personal approach allows service to be tailored to the needs of the specific community. for example, the catholic worker house started a street newspaper that published work from the community. i especially loved seeing the art and reading the poetry in the paper and then being able to meet the artists and writers themselves. i wholeheartedly agree with cst philosophy and i began thinking about the factors that allow me to explore this aspect of my faith. before this, i never gave much thought to the idea of community because i regard it as something important, but that has changed completely. my encounter with community vastly shaped my perspective on how i should serve others and god. it made me question my beliefs towards homelessness, drug addiction, and recovery. i now try to approach social issues through a cst lens. because of this experience, i will be participating in an sslp so that i can further explore and challenge my existing beliefs. the conversation about race is another that i believe would be productive to view from a cst perspective. christopher devron shares this belief and argues that "francis and c.s.t.'s [...] approach to systemic racism is similar: white people don't get a moral pass by simply refraining from overtly racist acts. rather, they must examine racial biases within systems; reflect on how they participate in and benefit from these biases; and then take deliberate action to change them." ("should catholic schools teach critical race theory?" by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten). i especially like how he encourages us to question how we benefit from racial biases. simply having a conversation about the existence of racial biases is not nearly enough. too often white students act sympathetic while not at all considering whether they can be the source of discomfort for people of color. since attending notre dame, i have become wary of these conversations because i think there is a palpable fear of being seen as racist and so 4 sometimes people overcompensate. one of my favorite opportunities i have participated in was the braiding sweetgrass book club because i think the discussion we had about notre dame's approach to racism and diversity was very honest. we talked about times when we felt uncomfortable as well as when we felt like the school did support and protect us. there are flaws but there are a lot of professors who are willing to do what they can to make this school a good learning environment for all students. i really liked the book club and i hope notre dame puts on more events like it. since coming to notre dame, my perspective on race has grown more complex. in high school debate, i almost strictly only read critical race theory and i thought i had a good understanding of it; however, reading about something is vastly different than living it out yourself. i never felt out of place because of race in my entire life so it was a very odd thing to encounter here. i plan to respond to these experiences with reasoning and logic. i am getting better at brushing off microaggressions and knowing that i do not need to waste energy over-analyzing them as anything more than ignorance. lastly, many of my thoughts this semester have been about how to improve myself and become the type of person i want to be. c.s. lewis' writing seems particularly relevant. in the screwtape letters, a demon tells his nephew that god " wants [humans] to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles. do not be deceived, wormwood. our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys." (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i want to fully embrace what god calls me to do. i am trying to keep this in mind while making decisions even when they seem insignificant. the situation lewis describes — when you cannot 5 find a trace of god — is an extremely difficult one. choosing to remain faithful when there does not seem to be a point is one of the hardest things we can do. one significant notion i have come upon is that many times the effort it takes for me to do something is easily surmounted by the amount of joy it brings someone. one of my friends is in the concert band and whenever she has a performance coming up, she only briefly mentions it. our friend group has managed to make sure there are a couple of us attending every time she performs even though it did not seem to be a big deal to her. the other night she and i were talking and she told me how much it meant to her that we have always been there to watch her. i think these are the kind of small decisions that are very important. if i want to love my friends as god calls me to, i need to decide to be there for them even when it does not seem important. i think i neglected these things too much with my friends in high school. these are the stumbles that have to happen for us to get better. my friendships have grown in importance to me because i see how much they can affect others and how easy it is to bring happiness to other people if you just put in a little effort. my first semester of college has been full of unexpected encounters but i am grateful for all of them because they are allowing me to grow and learn to become a better version of myself. i hope to continue this self-reflection process into my second semester and keep challenging myself to answer difficult questions. moreau final paper professor nguyen moreau paper 14 october, 2021 my journey at the university of notre dame i believe that i grow by reaching out of my comfort zone and doing that which may seem awkward. in high school, i hadn’t done that many clubs or activities that made me uncomfortable, and i didn’t like talking to new people because i was introverted and it made me feel really awkward. however, coming into college, i tried to change and reach out of my comfort zone to do some different things so that i could grow as a person. for example, i was not planning to do rocketry, as i thought that there would be a lot of weird people in the club. once, i got to notre dame, i told myself why not so, i went to the first meeting to just try it out and see how it was. i was surprised by how nice the people were in the club, and i have enjoyed participating in the acs section of the club so far. this way of being uncomfortable and vulnerable is apparent in the week 1 video, “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown. brené brown talks a lot about how powerful being vulnerable is when she says “they believed that which made them vulnerable, made them beautiful.” this shows that those who are vulnerable are happiest because they believed that their vulnearbilities made them special and worthy of connection. vulnerability helps us to embrace the real person that we are and grow to become and even better and happy person. this is why i think vulnerability and stepping outside of my comfort zone is so important; it allows me to come to terms with the person that i truly am and grow outside of myself to become a happier person. this also relates to being fearful and not letting fear hold me back from growth. in week 5, in carla harris’ 2021 laetare medalist address, she says “fear has no place in your success equation.” this pertains to growth, as i have always been fearful of stepping outside of my bounds and my comfort zone, thus preventing me from growing much. i must step past this fear of being rejected and fear of what if and be vulnerable so that i can develop. i believe that i also grow by shedding toxic relationships. in high school, i had a lot of toxic relationships dragging me down and preventing me from thriving as a person. entering college, i was able to shed all of these relationships, as i will probably never see those people again. since then, i think that i have been able to grow a lot and go outside of my comfort zone because i have not had any bad relationships holding me back. in the week 4 reading, “5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia taylor, taylor says “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often, we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t.” this definitely happened in high school, where i found that in some of my relationships i was trying too hard and getting nothing back and the people just weren’t good for me to be around. this inhibited my growth and made me not want to reach out to others and form new friendships. so, it is imperative for me in college to not form toxic relationships, and, if a relationship happens to become toxic, i should shed the relationship so that it doesn’t keep me from continuing to grow. i believe that i grow by also keeping myself from falling into a single story. in order to broaden my horizons and my perspective of the world and other people, i have to avoid the single story that everyone falls into and instead form my own opinions. in week 7, in her video “danger of a single story” chimamanda adichie mentions “[t]hat when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.” this shows that in order to grow and “regain a kind of paradise”, i have to let go of the idea that there ever was a single story and form my own story through my own interactions and experiences. i think that this is especially important for my growth at the university of notre dame, as a lot of people fall into that single story that everyone tells and people just make that their story. instead, i should experience whatever it is myself before making any judgments or assumptions about anyone or anything at notre dame. i believe that i pursue truth by being curious and asking questions. from the time i was a little kid, i have always asked questions about things i do not understand or want to know more about and have always been curious about everything. i think i have pursued truth this way, especially on campus. an extremely important example of this from my time on campus was when i switched majors the first week. now, this pursuance of truth was not looking for facts or evidence, but the truth of what my future could be. i dove deep into the curriculum for both physics and engineering and decided that the truth about myself was that i liked solving problems and building things than i did thinking about how the world works. this central personality trait of curiosity was shown in the survey that we took week 2. curiosity was by far my number one trait from the survey, which we took in order to discover our character strengths. this survey was important in solidifying something that i already knew about myself. i also think that my curiosity and my pursuance of truth through this curiosity will be important these next coming years as i attempt to discern what i think the truth about the world, people, and god, as well as my major and future job. i believe that i am searching for god. in grade school, i really believed in god and went to mass all of the time and prayed a lot of the time as well. however, once i got into high school, i started growing farther and farther away from god as i saw a lot of the evil things going on in the world and could not reconcile god being the epitome of good with all of this evil. however, during this first semester, i started going to mass again, and it has been my faith in the people around me that brought me to have faith in god. in week 3, professor fagerberg talked about the importance of faith in our relationship with god and in our relationships with others. he said that faith allows us to see outside ourselves and enables us to see god in everything, especially in other people. i think faith is the most crucial thing in my search for god. i haven’t totally rediscovered god yet, but i am on my journey there and i think that it will be my faith and seeing the good in others that will get me there to fully believing in god again. i believe that i am most centered at home with my family. being away from my brother and mom and dad made me realize how much i miss and love them. since i only live ten minutes away, i have gone to visit one time and left feeling very energized and full again. this showed me how much i should appreciate the time that i am able to spend with them, as after college i won’t see them much at all. my “where i am from” poem from week 6 reminded me of these things and how important my family is to me. i feel most happy, or centered, when i am at home with my family. each of the lines that i wrote in my poem was centered around being at home and feeling at home, and in writing this i realized how happy i am with them and how much a part of me they are. works cited “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one “via character strengths survey” by adult surveys moreau fye week two https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fal l_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three "5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia taylor moreau fye week four “2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five "where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six "danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story believe in yourself root beliefs: i believe that i can grow as a person by acknowledging my flaws. i believe that i can mature by establishing certain morals and values. i believe that i am in search of faith to help guide my decisions. i believe that i can forge healthy relationships by surrounding myself with real people. i believe that i can use past experiences to lead me on the path to success. i believe that i am shaped by family, friends, and home. i believe that my community should focus on the individual and ignore stereotypes. explanation of root beliefs: i believe that i can grow by acknowledging my flaws. i think that it is important to accept your own flaws in order to improve yourself. this will enable you to feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. having the courage to own one’s imperfections and be vulnerable is an essential part of people who are mentally healthy and well-functioning in society. dr brown commented on the characteristics of people who she found to be strong and confident stating, “these folks had the courage to be imperfect. they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i think by following the words of dr. brown, i too can develop into a better version of myself. the thought of improving my imperfections gives me the motivation and drive to become a better person that can have a positive impact on our community. at notre dame i am surrounded by intelligent and talented people. it is clear that many of the students use this ideology to flourish at notre dame. together, we can use our flaws to grow and improve society. additionally, i believe that i can mature by establishing certain morals and values. having strong principles that guide your actions are important for every individual. however, it may be difficult to balance your morals and the desire to succeed. oftentimes, morals and the desire for success can conflict. david brooks describes this friction claiming that “these two sides of our nature are at war with each other. we live in perpetual self-confrontation between external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). finding a balance between your two sides in order to be an honest, good person is essential. there is more to a person than what you see on the surface. these internal goals and beliefs are what truly make someone wholesome. at notre dame, it is evident that the majority of students have strong religious beliefs and moral values. i believe that this is what makes the students at notre dame so special and unique. furthermore, i believe that i am in search of faith to help guide my decisions. those who have a strong sense of faith seem to have a better outlook on life. remaining faithful and following god will lead you down the path of self-discovery. professor fagerberg defines faith in a unique way. he states that “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). this encourages me to further my faith and set aside more time for god. growing up, i never prioritized going to church. yet, now that i am at notre dame, a catholic university, i want to change that. with mass being so accessible i want to make it a priority to go a few times a semester. i feel like mass will allow me to reflect on my faith and have a moment of peace. it seems evident that by focusing more on my faith, i will be able to see differently, yet have a clearer vision of what i want to achieve. next, i believe that i can forge healthy relationships by surrounding myself with real people. on campus there are plenty of students who have similar goals as myself. i think it is important to seek out these people and establish relationships with them. this quote by olivia t. taylor in “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” describes the criteria of a strong, beneficial friendship. she states that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). finding real, wholehearted people and surrounding myself with them, will help me to succeed in life. additionally, bonding with others who have common interests and habits can lead to happiness and wellbeing. forging these healthy relationships will enhance my college experience and allow me to grow as a person. moreover, i believe that i can use past experiences to lead me on the path to success. rather than dwell on past failures, i can use these failed experiences as motivation in the future. i understand that i may perform poorly on an exam or project, but i cannot let this interfere with my goals. i want to adopt this strong mindset and use past mistakes and failures to improve myself. father moreau demonstrates this perfectly. the first notre dame, the one in paris, france, failed miserably. however, father moreau had a vision and used this failure to reshape notre dame. father kevin grove describes the situation stating “it was a gamble, one incredibly against the grain. but 170 odd years later you're sitting here as first year students, and the holy cross congregation continues as vibrantly as ever” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). father moreau exemplifies the power of using past experiences as a way to achieve success. i’m doing my best to follow father moreau’s lead and use my past to transform my future. also, i believe that i am shaped by my family, friends, and home. i believe that many of my decisions and actions result from these core parts of my life. while writing a “where i’m from” poem, it was clear to me that family, friends, and home have a great impact on me. george ella lyon describes this poem writing process stating that “the list form is simple and familiar, and the question of where you are from reaches deep” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). after writing the poem, i felt grateful and appreciative for everything in my life. i realized how lucky i am to have these things and that i am surrounded by many positives. i hope to continue forward with this positive outlook on life and use that to find happiness and success. finally, i believe that my community should focus on the individual and ignore stereotypes. most people don’t even realize they have an implicit bias and treat others differently. keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris describe this situation stating “it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” ( "how to think about 'implicit bias'" by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). at times, i may be guilty of this as well. however, i can improve by opening my mind and seeing that all types of people are capable of being great. after i do this, i can relate and learn from different types of people.once again, this is an opportunity for growth and positive change. people may come from different cultures and backgrounds, but that doesn’t take away from the skills and the personality traits they possess. comment by michael comuniello: question from tommy: mike, i'm working on the integration one assignment right now, and a question occurred to me. when the requirements state that "you are required to integrate content from each week of weeks 1 7 in your response," does said content include my commentary, or are quotes from the content that we read / watched the only pieces that count? let me know. thanks, tommy comment by michael comuniello: thanks for your question, tommy -you've met the citation requirement, as you referenced each of the week's in your reflection; well-done! michael comuniello moreau first year experience 10.15.2021 i believe in growth comment by michael comuniello: hi @tberner@nd.edu thank you so much for sharing a first draft of your integration reflection. i agree with you, i think it's very well written and it's clear you've put great effort into the assignment; seriously, i'm proud of you. in this reflection, i've only provided technical feedback/comments. as per usual, in your final draft i will follow-up with specific questions and comments for further reflection. most notably, there are a few instances where you speak in generalities and i want to push you to be more specific, more concrete. this is where the true integration between the semester's readings/themes and your experience lie. otherwise, i don't have any additional comments at this time. if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to reach out. blue skies, mike anticipated grade without additional edits: 188/200 _assigned to thomas berner_ through eighteen years of life, going to five different schools and living in two different states, it goes without saying that i’ve come a long way in my emotional and interpersonal development. i’ve made countless friends and gone through many feuds, breakups, and separations with friends. i’ve gone out of my comfort zone, overcoming nerves and going all in for my first kiss, first time trying a backflip on skis, or having the courage to tell my friends, “no.” i’ve built a solid foundation that prepared me in some ways for college, but i have a long way to go. i believe that i can build on these foundations and continue to develop myself and my relationships by having an open mind. since becoming a student at notre dame, i’ve been challenged mentally, both intellectually and emotionally, possibly more than at any other time in my life. i’ve struggled academically more than i ever have, scrambled to make friends in a brand new place, and missed home for the first time, and these struggles have brought negative emotions like stress and anxiety. however, i’ve also experienced so many gratifying moments and shared genuine interactions with new friends which have brought positive emotions like joy and contentment. this rollercoaster of emotions has been testing, and i find myself coping in ways that are not necessarily healthy, such as burying myself in my phone or ignoring the problem for as long as possible, which is where i have room to grow. as brené brown said in her ted talk, “you can't numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects, our emotions. you cannot selectively numb. so when we numb those, we numb joy, we numb gratitude, we numb happiness” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this is an area in which i can grow, an example of my still-developing emotional intelligence, though i believe that the foundations are already within me to facilitate this growth. as i reflected on in week 2, when i examine my own weaknesses, such as perseverance, self-regulation, and spirituality, i can see how grappling with these imperfections could lead to a better self. becoming more spiritual and disciplined would allow me to find new passions and be able to pursue them with rigor that i’ve never had. however, i believe that my strengths, especially perspective, will undoubtedly help me in my journey. as i continue to be tested by this new environment, i hope to have an open mind about these challenges and, as carla harris advised in week 5’s laetare medalist address, use this hardship as an opportunity to improve. by having an open mind, i can work toward framing setbacks and hardship as new lessons to use to better word toward one’s goals shows how growth can be a mindset. this is something that i struggle with, so trying to adopt the mentality that the challenges that i face are not only events of growth but also can improve me as a person will be helpful as i continue to encounter setbacks. comment by michael comuniello: similar to my previous comment, what might this look like? what resources might you be able to take advantage of in order to be more spiritual and/or more disciplined? spiritual: attend mass in morrissey w/ friends, connect w/ the priests-in-residence in your dorm, etc.? disciplined: accountability partner for bed/rising; attending office hours; check-ins w/ your moreau instructor, etc.? outside of myself, i believe that i have the capacity to strengthen the bonds that i’ve already made throughout my time both here and at home. though i’ve always cared for my friends, and i believe that i’ve found friends who care for me deeply, i think that i can do more to support them, which would bring us closer together. as stated in week four’s “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship:” “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term. think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend. the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship moreau fye week 4). especially during this transitional period in our lives, these words could not be more true. many people are facing discomfort and loneliness, so a mutual support of people who care for the growth and comfort of those around them is not only helpful but necessary to succeed. as i reflected on in week 3, to adjust to this new environment that i’ll call home for the better part of the next four years, i will need to have faith that those around me desire the same comfort and camaraderie that i do, and through mutual faith, build out a road map for this new environment together. this faith is not easy, as it requires trust in people that i only recently met, but i have foundations of trust in friends from home that have helped me in the past, which allows me to have more confidence in extending this trust to people around me now. friends and family are an integral part of my life, which can be seen in my week 6 where i’m from poem, where i mentioned friends or family members in every single stanza. i must continue to have faith in others and extend it to the people around me, as well as trust that if i invest more energy and care into the relationship, it will be reciprocated and strengthen our bond. looking forward, i intend to accomplish this goal by being more mindful of the impact that my actions have on others and try to become someone who is known as a supportive friend. to achieve these goals and better myself, i believe that i need an open mind that will not hinder me from diving in and discovering myself. i must be willing to chase diverse, genuine interactions, which, as i wrote in week 7, begins with the question, “what barriers hold me back from diverse interactions with others?” i would argue that while proximity to diverse environments is certainly a barrier, a closed mindset is a far larger one but can be overcome by seeking and embracing opportunities for dialogue with people of different backgrounds than yourself, which could be as simple as branching out and having a conversation with somebody that i don’t know. by encouraging myself to have an open mind, and allowing myself to build on the foundations that i have in my mental framework and in my relationships, i believe that i can grow and mature exponentially during my time at notre dame. 8/23/2021 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? searching for self-knowledge stands out the most to me. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: why is it that a seemingly simple thing like shame can completely control our lives in society? quote: “when you ask people about belonging, they’ll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded. and when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection.” i found this quote interesting because it rather hit home for me. i had never realized that we have a tendency to focus on the few mistakes we’ve made, rather than the vast successes of our lives. comment: dr. brown’s findings on vulnerability and the crucial role it plays in our happiness and courage were quite surprising to me. i have typically lived with the notion that one must avoid vulnerability in order to be strong and persevere. dr. brown completely opposes that thought, and says that those are the thoughts of people who are scared and have lots of built-up shame. i ultimately have come to agree with what she says to be true, although i still do not think that i like it very much. though i often find it easier to sit back and pretend to be tough, i suppose vulnerability is actually a good and healthy thing to admit. moreau integration two -luc robert gelin what am i made of? to answer this question, i feel that i should focus on my life story and where i come from. i was born in brooklyn to a haitian mother on october 26, 2002. i go back to the first families of the first generation of the "republic of haiti". indeed, i am a descendant of the first haitian head of state, jean jacques dessalines, on the maternal side. the latter had fought against the french army, to create the first black republic in 1804. the only black man present on the famous “titanic”, joseph philippe lemercier laroche was one of his grandsons, which makes me think therefore links to the latter from a family point of view. my ancestors mostly lived in the north of the island. sure enough, my mom and dad are both from the north although they raised me in the western department. i grew up in a context where haitian society has always been sick. i personally think that i am made of all those events stuck in a chronic crisis against the backdrop of corruption, haiti has been, since the founding of the first republic in the early 19th century, gripped by violence and held hostage by a faction of society, a small group of oligarchs, greedy for power and more and more carried by the search for rent or by the lure of profit. going back as far as the day after independence, we can retrace the historical course of a series of practices that would be at the origin of the current haitian crisis, showing how corruption could not only be a handicap to cohesion social, but also a brake on the economic development of the country. it has made it possible to squander public funds and further widen the existing gap between blacks and métis, between the urban world and the rural world. at the heart of corrupt practices and manipulative strategies, the haitian senate (and later parliament), as the main generator of conflict, pulls the strings in the interests of its members. formerly perceived by black peoples and by the oppressed around the world, as a model, a beacon of freedom, haiti, the rebel, is today decried, singled out and perceived by many, especially the caribbean neighbors, as the example not to be followed. how is it possible? how could a country, which has helped so many peoples or countries, including venezuela, colombia, bolivia, ecuador, the democratic republic of the congo, guinea, israel and even greece, pass from the inspiring status of megaphone of the “black world” to that also denigrating of the foil? difficult to find an objective explanation. some observers even find it very curious that in such a small country, whose territory is barely larger than the state of maryland (the equivalent of brittany), we cannot put an end to poverty, as billions of dollars have been poured into it in recent decades. haiti is, in fact, a land of paradoxes where the best, as well as the worst, are possible, and it would undoubtedly have known a better fate if the donations which are, in principle, intended for it were not dispersed, diverted and often shared upstream between donors and contractual companies, via a vast opaque or even mafia international network, organized by some of the supposed donors themselves. needless to say, by acting in this way, these pseudo-donors are only depriving the country of some of its faculties, including that of facilitating its economic development. suffice to say that there are serious doubts about the motivation of the international community which generally presents itself as the benefactor of haitians, the one who would like to help put an end to this recurring crisis which has shaken the country so much and which continues to disrupt the haitian society. in the meantime, this endemic crisis situation has, paradoxically, already enabled many western charlatans to invent themselves as experts on the “haitian problem” which they, like arsonist firefighters, themselves created through this same network of corruption. in haiti, in fact, the economy joins forces with politics to give a strong impedance to the traditional elites who gradually exclude from the political equation and from the “imaginary” democratic game, the people (the mass) who have seen their status reduced. to that of the simple spectator. his vote having been rendered useless or ineffective, in particular because of the numerous and recurring manipulations of the ballot, the results of which are often known in advance. studies on haitian systemic crises attempt to place in their context some of these practices that have shaped the haitian system. this work revolves around three main axes which are all themes addressed: the practices of the elites, the socioeconomic consequences for the rest of the population (in particular the most disadvantaged), and also the involvement or the impact of certain old practices on the current situation. combining empirical and analytical methods from various fields or fields of the humanities and social sciences, including history and sociology, it offers a vision of reality based on historical facts and events. the objective being not only to find correlations, interweaving and possible tensions between the past and the present, but also to show how the current crisis is it the consequence of certain inconsistencies of the traditional haitian elite or rather of 'a bourgeois or gentrified oligarchy. there is also a strong problem with regard to the environment in which young people evolve. in haiti, the integration of young people into society and into the labor market is a critical issue for the maintenance of social order. in this country which remains the poorest on the american continent and one of the most unequal in the world, activities have been paralyzed for almost a week in the capital and the main provincial towns. the demonstrators demand in particular the judgment of the possible corrupt, a real access to social services, but also work for the young people. in this fragile country characterized by chronic political instability, those under 21 represent more than half of the population. these young people are one of the most vulnerable groups and the one whose situation has deteriorated the most following the earthquake. in this context, understanding the aspirations, expectations and issues facing haitian youth has never been so crucial. “young people today are tyrants. they contradict their parents, devour their food and disrespect their teachers.” this sentence, wrongly attributed to socrates, reflects a contemporary reality, to say the least: members of one generation often find it incomprehensible how the next generation behaved. in a hyper-connected world, dominated by social networks, all this incomprehension manifests itself in the internet window. one need only look at the suggestions for a quick google search to realize this. the iniquitous fate that awaits haitian youth today must be corrected urgently. beyond a question of social justice, it is the future of the country which is at stake. indeed, the sacrifice of a rising generation risks to maintain an intergenerational vicious circle, guaranteeing the economic growth in the long term. in the current context of a profoundly changing labor market, in haiti as elsewhere, better understanding these young people allows the promotion of interventions more suited to the challenges they face in order to develop their potential. this is all who i am, this is what i am made of. i also believe it is my duty to devote my life to changing this situation. so, this is also what i’m made for moreau: first year experience counting my blessings melonio 1 professor retartha moreau: first year experience 15 october 2021 counting my blessings never would i have thought that i would be blessed enough to attend the university of notre dame through the gateway program. one year ago, i shrugged, said, “what the hell?” and submitted my application to the university, not thinking much of it. a few months later, i get the letter that tells me i’ve been admitted through the gateway program, and something in my heart stirs. as cliché as it sounds, i knew at that moment that i was going to end up here. i thank god every day that i have the privilege to learn in such rigorous classes, pass the golden dome on my walks across campus, and spend time with people that i know that i was destined to meet. as i look back on my first eight weeks here, i find that my beliefs have significantly changed. i strongly believe that connections are built upon vulnerability. i vividly remember driving to spring lake, new jersey with two of my gateway friends this past august. we were about to meet about twenty other members of our cohort and spend the weekend with them. my stomach was in knots, and i couldn’t stop fidgeting with my necklace and pulling on my fingers. what were they going to think of me? before i stepped out of the car, i gasped and came to a sudden realization; i have a fresh start. if i wasn’t going to be my authentic self, then what was this all for? if i wasn’t going to let myself step out of my comfort zone, then how would i truly connect with everyone? in that instant, i took a breath and embraced myself fully, flaws and all. as brené brown said, “they fully believed that what made them vulnerable made them melonio 2 beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i walked inside of the beach house and i was myself. that weekend, i fostered friendships that, over the course of these two months, have become ones that i know will last a lifetime. i believe that everyone has an important story to tell, and first impressions can never fully reveal that story. as a gateway student, first-year notre dame students might have preconceived notions about me and the rest of my cohort. some of them probably assume that we weren’t smart enough to get in first year, nor do we deserve to call ourselves notre dame students. what these individuals neglect to consider, is who we are besides the fact that we are gateway students. who we are “is conveyed not through facts but through emotional experiences — stories” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week 7). the single fact that they rely on is that we are gateway students. if they were to dig deeper, though, they would learn that each and every one of us are here for a reason. friendships could form between us, and they could abandon this one fact that they might think makes us “lesser” than them. i believe that god has put me on this earth to love. i was raised to put love above everything: love above anger, love above arguments, love above sadness, love above differences. god urges us to love one another unconditionally. since i’ve arrived at notre dame, i remind myself of this each morning when i wake up and every night before i go to bed. it’s become what i value most in life. the via character strength survey picked up on this during my second week on campus (the via character strength survey moreau fye week two), as it was my main strength. i wasn’t at all surprised by this, as it’s something that’s always been so prominent in my life. i believe that i was blessed with this life, and now it is my duty to give back. victor, class of 2023 puts words to my beliefs perfectly when he explains how “the one thing that i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup melonio 3 could never lose and that no one could ever take away from me is my faith” (“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by victor, class of 2023 moreau fye week three). if i were to be stripped down to nothing, i would still have god watching over me. he brought me into this world, and he will guide me unconditionally until the hour of my death. i believe that this is the greatest gift that i will ever receive: the gift of life. this is entirely why i want to study medicine. i can’t work miracles like he can, but i can assist with giving people their lives back by getting their health back in check. i believe that i have the power to be the voice for the voiceless. at this same time one year ago, i was at the darkest point in my life. i came to the realization that i had been sexually assaulted several times by my best friend. going to school with him was gut wrenching, and being in the same room as him made me physically ill. i reached out to everyone that i could: my friends, my teachers, the school administration, my parents. nobody fully understood me, nor did a majority of them believe me. my high school always preached the same message as the university of notre dame: “it’s on us” (“it’s on us nd the three d’s of being an active bystander” moreau fye week four). unlike the university of notre dame, however, my high school refused to follow this message. i was entirely ignored for months, and it was only when my parents threatened legal action that my school acted somewhat accordingly. after nearly a year of recovery and therapy, i am so thankful to say that i am now in a place to look past this point in my life and help others. i never want anyone to feel what i felt and go through what i went through. everyone deserves to be listened to, and i vow to speak up for those who cannot. i believe that true happiness and contentment won’t come without making mistakes and working harder than i ever have. even though these past eight weeks have been filled with many great memories, they’ve also been filled with me spending hours studying in the library. as a https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view melonio 4 prospective premed student, i am being pushed to limits that i didn’t even know i had. as if this weren’t stressful enough, i’m also a person who doesn’t like making mistakes. for the longest time, i was convinced that mistakes were a sign of weakness and inferiority: i always had to be on my a game, i always had to be the best, and i always had to be on top. after all, “i am from flashcards, textbooks, pencils, and lots of paper” (“i am from” by moreau fye week 6). i had to be perfect. during the first week of classes here, i realized that i had it all wrong. as carla harris states, “failure always brings you a gift, and that gift is called experience” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). this is something that i’ve been learning to embrace over the past two months. the university of notre dame doesn’t expect perfection: in fact, it’s discouraged. if i were to spend my time trying to be perfect and “the best”, i wouldn’t be truly happy. the absolute best thing that i can do for myself is working hard and doing my best. mistakes and failure are inevitable; it’s how i get back up that will be the difference between happiness and misery. every chance i get, i visit the grotto. i profusely thank god for putting me on this earth, and for thoroughly changing my life for the better. words will never do my gratefulness justice. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cuy-bth2pwarrmxhde69blec4tv0mngnnqvs5vdonrm/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 mr. oswald moreau fye 3 december 2021 finding family and balance due to cross country being a fall sport, i arrived at campus a week before the student body. i remember getting dropped off at the teams off campus house and right before knocking on the door thinking, “i am about to meet my best friends for the next four years of my life.” while this was an exciting moment, as one can imagine it was also quite nerve wracking. from that moment on, the week went by in a blur of excitement and exhaustion. thinking back on the time that has passed since that first knock on the door to where i am now, nearly done with my first semester of college, i am amazed at the growth i have been able to achieve. it feels like i have been here a lifetime when it really has only been four and a half months. fred devito once said, “if it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you,” and this is how i would best describe my last few months as i transitioned into a new life. it has been a fantastic experience that makes me extremely excited for the rest of my time here, but it has also presented its fair share of challenges. from the freshman plague, doing laundry on my own, to more challenging issues like times of loneliness and experiencing imposter syndrome, i have encountered a lot that required responding too. but through these encounters i have adapted, grown, and learned how be ready to respond better in the future. one of the things i was most nervous about coming into college was finding good friends. i knew i would have plenty of friends because i had a team, but there is a difference between being acquaintances with people and having real relationships. this was a concern of mine because i have always struggled to form deeper relationships with others. i have a hard time trusting people and opening up because i have been hurt in the past, but a quote from kirston helgesen has helped me see this vulnerability in a new light, “a breakable heart is a good thing because it allows you to grow and expand,” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by kirston helgesenmoreau fye week 10). this is the concept behind kintsugi, an artform which is intended to rebuild the soul. i had never heard of kintsugi before, but am absolutely in love with the idea of it. it offers a creative way to reflect on the pieces of yourself that maybe aren’t whole. and by channeling these emotions into the cup and letting them “break the cup”, the healing process can begin. because if the emotions can break the cup, but the gold glue can put the cup back together, than that is representative of your soul having the ability to be glued back together too. i have switched my mindset to view the new relationships i am forming as glue for my soul rather than a force that can break it. and i can say so far, that it has worked excellently. i would do anything for all my teammates, and i know they would do anything for me. it has been so comforting through this transition to have a team that has become a family away from home. in week eleven, we explored the idea of encountering community and i found the following quote especially helpful in my journey, “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart,” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmer moreau fye week 11). i feel this idea gives more purpose to the personal growth i have been trying to achieve because it shows that my personal growth effects more than just me. it improves the community and family i am in, which only adds motivation to keep trying to get better. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ while i love a good challenge and wanting to improve myself is something engrained into me, sometimes i need to step back and be happy with who i am now. my whole life i have been dedicated to being an athlete and student. over the years i think i started to lose my sense of identity and i began to let my sports and academics define me rather than just being something i did. i was told that if i worked hard all the time i would get where i needed to go. well, i got to the place i worked the first 18 years of life towards and now just feel pressure to achieve the next big thing. elizabeth cox says in her teded, “there’s often no threshold of accomplishment.” (what is imposter syndrome? by elizabeth coxmoreau fye week 9). this is something that i am recently coming to realize, and i’ve decided it is time to figure out the fine line between work and enjoyment in life. i do still believe having reasonable expectations, aspirations, and goals are healthy for producing a drive to succeed. it is just when these become consuming that they are no longer healthy. to combat this consumption in work, i have instilled a routine in my week consisting of little things that i know i will enjoy. for example, sunday mornings are for getting a smoothie bowl at purely pressed and sunday nights are for getting dinner with a few seniors on the team. monday mornings are for a warm coffee and thursday mornings are for a bagel for breakfast. it is these little things that are beginning to make a big difference in my work-life balance. here at notre dame, we as students are at a critical point in our lives. we are formed by our encounters and experiences over the next four years. the goal over the course of our time here is not necessarily to grow into the person we are destined to be the rest of our lives, but rather learn how to stand up on our own and take life head on. the following quote from c.s. lewis’s screwtape letters sums this up perfectly, “he leaves the creature to stand up on its own legsto carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish,” (the screw tape letters https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?module_item_id=109705 by c.s. lewismoreau fye week 12). life is not easy and i know i will be continuously challenged, but i am confident that i will learn how to respond well to these challenges during my time here at notre dame. looking back and moving forward integration 2 looking back and moving forward what have i encountered and how will i respond? wow! what a big question to ask. i have encountered a dizzying array of events since starting college in august. i guess i respond di�erently in each situation. most of my strategies and focuses in high school and in my hometown have now shifted or blurred since coming to school. i cannot tell if that is a good thing or not. i hope it is for the good, but i guess only time will tell. can the people around me see how i am changing and growing or is it all in my head? i had a great time being home over thanksgiving break. laughing at movies, telling stories at dinner, and playing games outside with my family was ine�able. five days felt so short, and i enjoyed feeling like a kid again; like i was not in charge of every aspect of my life and like i had the time to let go and have fun. but it is not the same: i eat what i want, when i want; i set my own curfew; i hang out with my friends at all hours of the day; i choose how i spend my time. finding that balance at home and since coming back after break has been di�cult. my mom thinks she can see a change in me that she does not like. that supposed change is the same thing my friends at college praise me for. now i seem to feel uncomfortable sometimes both at home and at school, because i cannot figure out how i feel about the person i am. as i sit here writing this paper, i am with my friends and yet i feel out of place. i wonder the same thing elizabeth cox does: “why can’t so many of us shake feelings that our ideas and skills aren’t worth others’ attention?”1 i guess i also wonder whether imposter syndrome can be solved by spending time and reaching out with the people closest to me, or if i need to spend some time reflecting by myself? i think i am scared to spend time reflecting on myself because i already know that my problem is opening up and being vulnerable with the people closest to me. i love when my friends and family are vulnerable with me, and i always try to make them feel comfortable and supported with their feelings. despite feeling comfortable in these vulnerable situations, i resist being vulnerable with the people close to me. i guess that is where my brokenness exists: the gap between being in vulnerable situations and being vulnerable. i logically know that being vulnerable and sharing my 1 “what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo emotions and inner thoughts is healthy for myself and enriching for the relationships i want to foster. however, i have spent too much time investing myself in some relationships and with some people that were not worth it, to commit to being vulnerable after knowing these college friends for less than four months. i am a big believer in “mind over matter” and i personally prefer to take care of others instead of having others take care of me. i hope that “the things [i’ve] experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly”2 are things i can grow forward from. i want to work on being vulnerable with the people i care about, but i just think it is just going to take some time. parker j. palmer claims that “hard experiences [are] not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing.” 3 like i mentioned earlier, i think he might be right. i think the biggest thing i learned from covid is the importance of having real experiences and connecting with amazing people. though i had a great time during covid making memories with my family, the memories i have made here at college so far are like no other. i believe that we are the beginning of the next “roaring ‘20s.” our generation is tired of sitting around and getting lost online; we want to go out into the world and live. this gateway community is my “gateway to the real thing.” i know that these people are the ones i want to have next to me for the next four years and the next few decades after that. i have great friends at home, but few are like the amazing people i have met here. i have seen them fall and get back up and grow and ask for help and cry and laugh and so much more. i want to make sure that they see me do the same. i am not used to sharing my none happy and positive experiences with other people, but i think that my community here will hold me and help me with the many things i go through. this catholic community is full of genuine, honest, kind people. we hold ourselves to high standards morally. we work hard to fight o� demons that “tempt and destroy human [values].”4 sometimes, i wonder if i fall short of the person i want to be. most of the time, god is the only one who sees it and the only one who knows. i had an experience a couple weeks back, that up until coming to college, i did not know was considered bad in the eyes of the catholic church. though i do not want to repeat my actions, i am struggling with how to feel about myself and my faith. however, i have hope that my community can help me heal and find my way as i create my opinions 4 “a brief introduction to the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve 3 “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven 2 “women finding healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192751?module_item_id=109544 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ and learn to balance between my faith, my feelings, my experiences, and myself. i am excited to move forward into the new year with a deeper understanding of myself and the way i approach and respond to the experiences i encounter. i think i can grow in many ways that will make me proud of myself. week 14 integration 2 navigating an unexpected first year i still remember the excitement i had leading up to college during the summer. i told myself i was going to meet new people, workout everyday, start following a strict daily schedule, get my homework done early, and had so much more planned. for the first few weeks of school this was going great, until i hurt my knee and all of my plans for a perfect college experience came tumbling down. my hopes for fun football games and interhall soccer were confined to a riding scooter that drove at a snail's pace. after coming back from fall break, i was nervous to get started on school again. all of my excitement from the beginning of the year was gone as my expectations were no longer possible. however, one quote from our moreau assignment that week stuck out to me. it stated ““but i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary.”(“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). this quote related not only to my injury situation but also life in general. it forced me to take a step back and realize that things were ok even though they were not perfect. i mean, if everything is perfect all the time, what chances do you have to grow and learn new things? this acceptance of understanding the faults in expectations segways perfecting into accepting brokenness. unfortunately, i have dealt with lots of different brokenness in my life. whether it be personally, with friends and family, or in my community, it has always been something i have needed to deal with. ever since getting back from fall break i had to deal with no knee, consoling a friend who had a friend from home passed away, and getting a brutal case of the flu that took me out of school for a week. through these situations it became very difficult to find motivation to do school work, hang out with friends, and even get out of bed in the morning. while it was extremely difficult i remembered the kintsugi workshop and how the main girl said, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.”(“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” from grotto moreau fye week 10). just like my commentary on dealing with failed expectations, a similar mindset can be used to deal with adversity and brokenness in your own life. noted, i would not wish brokenness on anyone, but if they had to experience it i pray that they would know things get better. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ i will now transition away from my knee. while it has been a major part of my first year there still are other things that happened. after returning from thanksgiving break i realized how fortunate i am to be at notre dame and to have met the people that i have. the community that we have here on campus is unlike anything my old friends talk about at their schools. the biggest difference that i have found with my friends here is that we talk about bigger things than just “what’s the plan tonight” or “who's hosting”. this ties into the quote “we cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation”(“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week 11). it draws into the fact that the deeper communication and experiences people share the deeper their connection grows. i can honestly say that my friends here are some of the most fun and genuine people that i have ever met and for that i am eternally grateful. finally, i will talk about hope. unfortunately i will tie this back into my knee, but will also connect it to my faith. i remember asking in my week 12 qqc “why is hope so difficult to maintain during hard times?” this was a genuine question that i was struggling with. on the outside it looked like i had everything together, was staying composed, and my inability to do most things wasn’t bothering me. i knew that in a matter of weeks i would be able to walk again, and in a matter of months would be able to participate in all the activities i love. but yet on the inside i was freaking out, breaking down, struggling to find any strands of hope that i could cling to for just a few days at a time. looking back now i see that everything turned out great, i am able to walk, no major bad things happened, i didn’t really miss out on any big activities. so, why was it so hard to maintain my hope when i was going through it? i knew these things would come to an end eventually but still struggled with my current state. this is where i began to question my relationship with god. “why me?” i would ask as i lay in bed in pain while my friends were at a football game. i kept being told i just need to stick through it and everything will be better eventually. for me, reading something has much more effect on me than hearing it because hearing things like that can sound a bit shallow and dismissive. a quote that stuck with me more than any words did was “we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next.”(“holy cross and christian education” by notre dame moreau fye week 12). the quintessential “trust the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414?module_item_id=106246 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414?module_item_id=106246 process” idea but put in the context of faith. this small reminder of motivation to trust the lord is the hope that i was looking for to keep a healthy mindset. writing this paper now feels a little bit ironic as i wrote the first integration assignment the day after my surgery and now i am writing this one a few days after i was cleared to walk normally again. i have learned and grown so much through the first semester of moreau. accepting vulnerability and talking with others has taught me so much about how to interact with others and instilled a curiosity and desire to meet new people. moreau 15th october 2021 what do i believe? table of contents i believe that being vulnerable can help everyone to overcome their problems......................... 2 i believe that it is commendable to live for your eulogy, but this does not go along with our society ................................................................................................................................... 2 i believe that morality must be an essential factor when making decision................................ 3 i believe that making real friends will become harder once i will be in the working environment .......................................................................................................................... 3 i believe that implicit bias is not always a bad thing ................................................................ 4 i believe that being vulnerable can help everyone to overcome their problems first of all, what does it mean to be vulnerable (in class discussion, moreau fye week one)? vulnerability refers to allowing people to see you for you truly are. however, being vulnerable also means accepting yourself, with your strength and weaknesses. therefore, being vulnerable means allowing yourself to not be perfect, it means to understand that you, as everyone, have problems. hence, i believe that vulnerability can help everyone to overcome these problems, as the first step to solve an issue, is identifying the issue. being vulnerable will also help you to connect to other people, who can be a big resource when in need. therefore, this is why i believe vulnerability is a commendable virtue, not only to better accept yourself, but also to overcome problems that may come up during your life. i believe that it is commendable to live for your eulogy, but this does not go along with our society our society is structured in a way that, since the age of 16, people tend to give everything they have to their academic/working life, instead of really focusing on their personal growth. this is what it means to live for your resume (in class discussion, moreau fye week 2). i personally believe that this is quite a big issue, as it increases the level of stress and, possibly, depression. everything must be as efficient as possible; therefore, people end up chasing task after task without taking time to reflect on themselves and on what really matters. living for your eulogy would mean cultivating those values that make you a better person, cultivating relationships with others, interests and developing curiosity. fortunately, not everyone lives for their resume, and i have encountered many people here at notre dame who are the perfect example of this. the reason why i say it is commendable to live for your eulogy is that it will allow a deeper understanding of yourself, ultimately leading to a strong positive impact on those who are around you, which i believe it is much more important than just a resume. i believe that morality must be an essential factor when making decision because of the structure of our society (see paragraph 2), morals are often forgotten by a lot of people in their daily life. this is because our society focuses more on business than people, and often the most profitable road is the less moral. however, i believe that having a framework of morals (in class discussion, moreau fye week 3) is essential not only in a business environment, where it can prevent massive problems like exploitation of labor force, but also on a quotidian basis. this is because having morals will help every individual to “take the right path” when faced with difficult choices. this is also a matter of freedom. having morals will help everyone to have freedom, without falling into the trap of subtracting other people’s freedom for our own. therefore, if everyone followed some sort of morals (this includes faith), the society would be much better off as this would create a happy environment for everyone to live in. i believe that making real friends will become harder once i will be in the working environment “finding quality friendships is not easy” (5 signs you are in a toxic relationship by olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week 4). i decided to start this paragraph with a quote. it might seem a https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ pretty simple concept, but if i properly think about it, it is not easy to understand. during my whole life i was always surrounded by a lot of friends. and yes, i am using the word friends as, despite being very picky, i could always count on each one of them. the reason why i chose this quote is that it is very scary to me. this is because even though i have (or i believe to have) a very healthy mental health, this is the effect of the support i get from friends and loved ones. the fact that, in the next few years, i might end up alone looks more like a nightmare than a real possibility, but it is in fact a very concrete concept. therefore, the only thing that gives me hope is that i believe that if i treat the people around me with respect and i care for them, i might have some sort of return in the future. in italian, there is a common phrase that goes “ognuno raccoglie i frutti di quel che semina” which can be translated in “the harvest you reap reveals the seeds that you planted”. i believe that implicit bias is not always a bad thing to understand my belief, it is important to understand what implicit bias is and why it is considered a bad thing. implicit bias is a “tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our mind” (how to think about implicit bias by keith payne, laura niemi and john m. doris, moreau fye week 7). the reason why implicit bias is often considered to be bad is because it is based on stereotypes, and as in our society there are big issues based on stereotypes (e.g., racism or homophobia), implicit bias ends up being seen as a very bad thing (by transitivity). however, i believe that implicit bias actually helps individuals to make the right judgments, as long as they are aware of it happening. this is because having implicit bias by itself is not a bad thing. human beings do not always agree with what their first impression is, and therefore they must not feel constrained by it. having implicit bias and realizing to have it https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ can, in fact, help the individuals in recognizing something wrong and fix it. therefore, implicit bias can have a positive effect instead of a negative one, hence leading to the conclusion that implicit bias is not always a bad thing. i believe that being vulnerable can help everyone to overcome their problems i believe that it is commendable to live for your eulogy, but this does not go along with our society i believe that morality must be an essential factor when making decision i believe that making real friends will become harder once i will be in the working environment i believe that implicit bias is not always a bad thing integration #2 by isabella nunez isabella nunez professor vanessa chan moreau 3 december 2021 encountering myself at notre dame setting foot in notre dame i was not sure what to expect, or what was expected of me. i was definitely nervous and scared that i would not fit in or be able to find myself among my fellow freshmen. however, i soon came to realize that i was not alone in such a feeling and that i had a group of people that would support me throughout my whole journey. my dorm mates, my professors and my advisors have been there for me throughout this whole process and have given me the comfort of knowing i have people to fall back on. their kindness and understanding has allowed me to feel free to explore everything notre dame has to offer which has also led to many discoveries about myself. i have had the privilege to analyze different aspects of my life and understand how my own dissonance, brokenness, community and hope can lead to a beautiful horizon of friendship and success, academic and personal, here at notre dame. the first thing i remember when experiencing notre dame was feeling incredibly lonely. i did not know anybody and felt that any friendship that i created was fleeting and meaningless since they did not seem to “stick” or be the right fit. i struggled in finding what to talk about with others and i could not comprehend why people would be so excited to experience college if college was truly like this. i was also scared of thinking that that one experience was all there was to it. i did not want to believe that i would spend the next four years of my life feeling so out of place and uncomfortable. however, thanks to god, this was not the case. a few days after my initial college experience shock i met a wonderful girl named annabelle in my dorm. we became very close friends and she even introduced me to another girl named lluvia. we discovered we all had a lot in common and even where we were different, we complement one another. i started to feel more at home and comfortable within my community and realized the pleasure of spending time with people who truly enjoy your company and appreciate you for who you are. soon after we all became friends, we started having conversations, as friends do, and we discovered that many of our initial college experiences had actually been quite similar. we all related to emery bergmann in that we found it hard to believe that we would be able to “find our people” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). the way she described the college experience as a freshman was so painfully accurate it made us laugh way too hard. looking back on it, it seems quite silly that i was so terrified. i guess it was because i did not really understand what i was getting myself into. i feel like in this experience i learned that creating genuine relationships takes time and i should not feel so scared the next time i am thrown into a new situation. i feel like i now have a better understanding on how to handle situations and i have also learned that i need to be patient in order to find the people i am meant to be with. i discovered that once i let go of the expectations i had of college and the people around me i was able to truly be open and know that whatever i feel is probably what those around me feel too, so it is okay to relax and try to take it slow when approaching new situations. moreover, i also had a strong fear that i would not be able to fit in as an international student of color. i really enjoyed reading christopher devron’s article. a particular quote that struck me was, “pope francis and catholic social teaching enjoin on us a responsibility to actively reverse systemic injustices that we have sadly inherited” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week 10). i felt at ease https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 knowing that the catholic community is one that embraces acceptance and has no tolerance for discrimantion of any kind. i also liked hearing within the article about how race can also be cause for divide. here at notre dame i have discovered that i am accepted by every group of people and that i have nothing to fear in that respect. i have made friends of different backgrounds and cultures and we all enrich one another in different ways. embracing our diversity has taught me the importance of acknowledging our differences and using them to learn from one another and discover we all have things to learn from those who surround us everyday. this is definitely a lesson i will carry throughout my life and share in my family and in my future workplace. i have also felt more at ease listening to other students experiences, “and a lot of people don’t recognize that because you can’t just place every race somewhere between black and white because the asian experience, the latino experience, is so different from the black experience” (“with voice true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). i feel like it’s often hard for me to relate to others’ experiences about racism and social injustice. this video helped me realize that that is okay and that my experience is valid because feelings are particular to each person. i feel like this is something that will help me in the future when talking to different people and listening to their own experiences. there is no competition, but rather support needed in the community in order to be able to create an environment in which everyone is comfortable and able to be themselves. finally, here at notre dame i encountered hope in my faith. i particularly enjoyed reading the screwtape letters. a quote that i quite enjoyed reading was, “we [demons] cannot tempt to virtue as we do to vice” (“screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i truly have found that here at notre dame i have had the opportunity to be tempted to be virtuous. https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491/download?download_frd=1 everything about notre dame lures you into reflection and prayer. i feel like i truly have gained insight into my life as a catholic and feel inspired to pray and live the catholic life through notre dame’s encouragement. this warms my heart and continues to make me glad i picked it as my university. i also feel like i am strengthening my faith and gaining confidence in it which will help me more as i grow older and form a family. i feel like it is important to acknowledge that our religions must be valid to us before we can transmit it to someone else. this is something that i feel i am and will continue to accomplish as i grow in my faith here at notre dame. in conclusion, my time here at noter dame has been short but sweet. i have learned a lot about myself but even better i have gained insight that has helped me grow and will continue to aid me in the future. be it at work, at home or socially the lessons i am learning here at notre dame continue to make me more whole and knowledgeable about the world around me and the people that surround me. i have loved every minute of this experience and can only hope that next semester brings good things as well! 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? the objective that particularly stands out to me is “deepen your self-knowledge”. as i was leaving for college this summer i had thought to myself about what i wanted to accomplish in college. i came to the conclusion that one of my main goals was to find out who i really am as a person while i am here. coming from houston, i will not have many influences from high school at notre dame, so i can be whoever i want to be. so through moreau i am glad i will have the chance to reflect on who i am as a person and who i want to be through the objective of deepening my self knowledge. i am excited to be around people who likely have very similar values and personalities to me, yet still have different life experiences. because of this i think i will be able to learn more about myself by being around people who i will have a lot in common with. while deepening my self-knowledge i want to find out what type of people i like to be around, what truly makes me happy, and what gives me value in life. additionally, i hope to deepen my understanding of myself as a notre dame student and figure out what makes me happy specifically while i am here. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: quote: “this is what politics looks like today. there's no discourse any more; there's no conversation. there's just blame” (the power of vulnerability | brené brown | tedxhouston). i resonate with this quote because it is an accurate depiction of politics today and i think it sheds light on human behavior. blame is such a dangerous thing because people do not embrace differences and the unknown. instead of having civil discourse where people can work together through their differences and come to an agreement, politics specifically has become increasingly more polarized. while this is obviously apparent in politics, i too can reflect on how this plays a role in my life. oftentimes when i feel stupid, i get very insecure and instead of being okay with that, i sometimes become angry. instead of just accepting that it is ok to not know everything, my instinct is to somewhat resent the other person for bringing it up. by learning to embrace my vulnerability i can start to stop blaming others. comment: i think brené brown’s advice can be summarized into the idea that you must have the courage to be vulnerable in order to feel a sense of belonging. i think this advice is essential to living a life where you feel valued and while i am at notre dame. as i discussed in my reflection from the syllabus’ objectives, i hope to find self-knowledge at notre dame. additionally, while i am at notre dame in order to feel like i belong, i will need to be vulnerable around my peers and faculty here. because i think at notre dame students have very similar values, this will aid my ability to be vulnerable because i know people will probably have similar insecurities. for example, i am afraid i am going to oftentimes feel like i am not smart enough to be here, but likely, everyone else is insecure about the same thing. even yesterday during my calculus class, i was confused over basic things but then i looked around and many other people were just as confused. if we all embrace that insecurity then we will cultivate an even stronger sense of community. ’s mission statement i want to be a fairy godmother—the person that makes things more beautiful, the person that transforms things and creates. i want to collect, create, and highlight the beauty all things naturally possess. i see this passion in everything i do, from my obsession with collecting paper scraps, receipts, and photos to make beautiful collages to my love for finding lesser known musical artists and curating their songs into niche playlists. i see this passion in my student journalism where i collect quotes and anecdotes forms students to create a larger, sweeping understanding of people’s problems and opinions. i see this passion in my creative writing process, which is largely formed by my collection of human experiences, words, phrases, and concepts that i gather from my daily life. i was put on this earth to highlight the unexpectedly beautiful. john graney growth, experience, and openmindedness: the building blocks of my inner self belief #1: i believe that i grow by opening myself up to the uncomfortable side of the world. "our job is to say you (children) are imperfect and you are wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this quote is from week one of moreau and comes from dr. brene brown who believes we should approach the raising of children into our world. many new parents hope to protect, and keep the idea of struggle as far away from the lives of their children as possible. with the technology, and attitudes of a lot of parents, it is becoming more and more feasible for parents to keep their children within the bubble of protection that they hope to provide. this question of whether or not to allow for certain amounts of struggle in the lives of your own child is extremely difficult because as adults we have felt the pain of shame, and struggle, and as loving parents we don’t want our children to experience those feelings at all. but this quote brings back the idea that vulnerability is needed for feelings such as joy and happiness to be present, and to take away the negative aspects of vulnerability will take away the positive as well. so as i grow into an adult and become a parent one day, i think that what dr. brown will remain extremely important as she instructs us to realize that your child is not perfect, and accept the fact that they will face difficult times, but always be ready to be by their side, and make it known to them that they are not alone and that they are loved. “i am from a man, strong and loyal to what he believes,” i pull this quote from my poem in week six and the man i am referring to is my father. my dad is a persuasive man who does not waiver from the feelings that he holds. one of these very strong feelings is my fathers belief in exposure to the harsh realities of this world. he has always felt that i should experience things for myself and make my own decisions about my feelings on the matter. he’s encouraged me throughout my life to be vulnerable and put myself out there to be uncomfortable, but i know that he will always be there by my side the moment that i need him to be. “adam 1 (creator of innovation) is built by building on your strengths, adam 2 (internal goodness) is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). although my dad has probably never seen the video from which this quote came, he has pushed me to develop both of these aspects of myself. as a kid i would get upset with my dad for making me do things that i wasn’t good at or didn’t want to do, but now as i have grown i know that he was looking for me to develop perseverance and grow through these uncomfortable situations. throughout my life he has shown me what it means to be a man and what it means to be a father; and i will always love him for the dedication he has given to me to push me to pursue the creation of the best possible person that i can be. belief #2: i believe that in-person, true living cannot be replaced by a life of illusion. “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t taylor moreau fye week 4). this quote speaks to me more today than ever before. with the abundance of social media, and phone usage that we see today, peoples’ attention is spread extremely thin. people are constantly checking their phones and this detachment from reality shows that person's lack of respect for the people, and the world around them. i understand that in the times that we live, technology cannot be avoided, but every now and then it is important to pay attention to the world around you, and take a moment to let the beauty, and love of the people in your life fill your soul. attention truly is one of the rarest forms of love, and it is a variety of love that i hold with extremely high regard in my life, because attention to the world around me has also allowed for me to tap into my spirituality that is present within the real world. i think that this quote truly speaks to this connection to our attention to the world around us and our spirituality. “spiritual life is not a private and secret place in our hearts. … spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). the disconnection between spirituality and the real world is something that i see all over the world with many people leading their lives with the belief that their spirit is something dormant within themselves that they put on along with their church clothes every sunday. however spirituality is something that is always present in every aspect of our lives no matter how small or insignificant that moment may be. our attention to these moments within our lifes is the key to experiencing this spirituality. belief #3: i believe that to succeed in the future, we must learn to forget the biases of our past. “when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). this quote from carla harris at her 2021 laetare medalist address and it speaks volumes on my belief that we must accumulate knowledge from every aspect of our past in order to be successful in our future, but for us to truly bring out the full potential of our knowledge we must also learn to forget the biases that fill our lives. many people like to believe that they live completely free of bias, because an admittance to bias makes us feel weak minded, but biases are truly unavoidable. the author of how to think about implicit bias says that “many of us are more biased than we realize” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7). although this fact may be true, the important thing for us as people with bias, is realizing that we have them. so that we can remove these biases from our future endeavors and become truly successful individuals. i believe that the defense of our country is sacred. i believe that my purpose in life is to support this defense. i believe that all people are born good. i believe that i am searching for who i place ultimate trust in. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable. i believe that i am responsible for the well-being of my family. i believe that i grow by exercising more control over my life. my first two beliefs work hand in hand so i shall discuss them together. i believe that these are rooted in who i am, and draw from, and understanding how my background and who i am through my week 6 poem enforces why i feel this. i grew up in a family where selflessness is a paramount virtue along with responsibility. given that i also grew up and embraced the boy scout lifestyle i think that is why i believe these things. who i am right now and how i grew up are most reflected in these beliefs. furthermore, drawing on what i came to understand while composing my week 5 qqc, i feel that god, in conjunction with preventing me from going to the air force academy, intended to still deepen and confirm these feelings during my time here. i believe that this is why i believe that the defense of our country is sacred and why supporting it is my purpose in life. my belief in why all people are born good can i feel is best found in my week 4 and 7 qqcs. i feel that we are predisposed to be kind to one another, only with the creation of barriers like cliques do we feel the need to be mean to others. i have come to realize that while cliques can build community in a microcosm environment like a public high school, they create insular worldviews for those who join or recognize them. insular worldviews can create a need to exalt oneself over those who don’t satisfy the given worldview. i also believe that these insular worldviews can be a reason for not confronting one’s inner demons and living more wholeheartedly. being insular leads to someone a feeling of completeness, which is unachievable in human form, and therefore unjust, and leads us to stray from the good path. i believe that someone’s environment and culture are what create these insular feelings and further enforce why i believe all people are born good. i believe that i might have trust issues, hence why i am searching for who i can place ultimate trust in, to be completely open and vulnerable to them. i am a very private person, i probably value it a little too much. that being said, i feel that despite having been encouraged to be vulnerable many times, i cannot be truly vulnerable because i do not trust those around me. as i discussed in my week 1 qqc i was given a similar opportunity to be vulnerable with people i had never met before when i was 16. i also feel that while i have been initially vulnerable with those around me i have not felt vulnerability has been reciprocated, hence why i posed my question in week 4. i feel that although i can be rather vulnerable with my mother i care too much about how she perceives me to be truly vulnerable. i do believe that being vulnerable is how i can forge life-giving relationships. the four people i have the strongest relationships with are people i’ve been willing to be vulnerable with and had that a lesser vulnerability has been reciprocated. these relationships are with my best friend growing up, my biological half-brother, my mother, and a friend i made at the aforementioned camp. i think that this affirms my question from week 4. i feel that while i have work to do to strengthen these relationships that it falls more upon the other person to strengthen them, with the exception of my mother. i believe that in order to do this i must draw upon my faith in these people more as they have proven to me that they can be trusted. my belief that i am responsible for my family comes from growing up as the man of the house. i believe that part of integrating my faith in my life is manifesting what i believe god has intended for me. i believe that he sent me here to deepen my relationship with him because i recognized that it was rather weak. i believe that this is where he wants me to learn who i truly am. i believe that being a father will be the greatest way i will make my faith manifest. our world is very hectic and chaotic, and the choice to bring a child into that world is putting an immense amount of faith in god. one must believe he has your well-being in mind because of the gravity of this decision. i believe that this is how i fulfill what i felt was unfulfilled when i wrote my week 3 qqc. i believe that i will grow when i exercise more control over my life. my greatest sin growing up was my greed, made evident by my unsatiated thirst for accolades. i wanted to hog all the glory in the world for myself. once i got over my unhealthy obsession with this, which stemmed from my relationship with my biological mother, i found myself in between a rock and a hard place. i had no general direction and i had no desire to find one, i had become passive. i feel that overcoming that obsession was me coming to a place similar to the one i envisioned when i wrote my week 2 qqc, i just hadn’t realized it yet. i don’t know what to do right now, i have found a desire but no compass to put me on the right course. i feel that i need to reclaim the passion i had when i was obsessed with accolades, but utilize this passion for good and with a healthy mindset. intergration #12 an unknown road the worst thing to happen to a person is to become lost. it not only brings about confusion and desperation but also feelings of doubt and discernment. i was lost. this was very hard for me to admit, amidst dropping calculus and struggling on some quizzes; but i was lost. not the kind of “lost” in which you can’t find your way if you looked no, i was lost. the type of “lost” that even if you find a way you don’t know if it is the right way to go, or to stay [on]. this semester, unlike no other time in my life, made me feel lost, and i hated it. imposter syndrome: the persistent inability to believe that one's success is deserved or has been legitimately achieved as a result of one's own efforts or skills. it was a phrase i had so frequently heard of throughout my first months at notre dame. in several discussions, and conversations, it was an idea that i could not escape. many would even warn of feeling this emotion, despite being just as worthy and qualified to be at notre dame as other students were. ironically though, as a black girl in a majority white school, this was the least of my worries. it was expected that i would feel this way due to that clear factor, but in a surprising way, that was not the case. (“why letting go of expectations enables you to live a better life” by julia hoganmoreau fye week nine) i was in the middle of calculus class when the boy next to me began snoring. i contemplated waking him up especially because calculus was not the type of class you wanted to sleep through. tapping on his arm, i quietly told him that he fell asleep. when he got up, he first looked around, then at the board, then at me. “it’s okay.” he responded. “i’ll be fine, it's easy.” https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau then he went back to sleep. at that moment, i had been so baffled by his words that i began laughing. i didn’t believe him, because i knew i struggled and just assumed we all were the same but that was far from the case. as time went on, and the math became more complex, and far from the familiar algebraic equations i knew, my confidence began to dwindle. little did i know, that was the start of my “imposter syndrome.” after my second calculus midterm grade, i was broken. weeks upon weeks, i spent studying had gone to waste once my grade was revealed. i was so devastated. “even when you put your best foot forward, you still fail.” thoughts such as those were running through my head. i was even too embarrassed at one point to talk to my parents about my failure; and as the date for dropping classes was rolling around the corner, i went through which decision i would make. asking numerous people, and seemingly praying every other day, was still not giving me the answers that i so desperately desired. it seemed as though everything i did would paint my future and that thought alone scared me to death. i eventually decided to drop it. even while dropping it, i still remained unsure with my choice. however, i kept trying to remind myself that simply because the path i had initially regarded as mine, did not work out for me, [it] did not mean that my ability to work and follow through on another was gone. this was a challenging experience, that in turn, helped me grow as a person and a student, and i should strive to see it that way. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop'' by kirsten helgesonmoreau fye week ten) https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau finding a path was another struggle i did not see myself encountering in college. “i’m going to be a doctor, as a biology major, and on the pre-med track”. i was so sure of this future when entering college. yet, as i walked out of my advisor’s room after dropping calculus, i began to rethink this clear path that for some reason started to become blurry the more i looked. in my chemistry, and biology classes, i would contemplate this path, at lunch, and in bed too. it was a bug that would not stop bothering me, no matter how hard i tried to kill it. i talked to anybody and everybody. from my friends, and family, to advisors and strangers i just needed an answer, yet nobody’s response seemed to lead me to my “light.” leaving the college of science meant potentially leaving behind a close-knit, and understanding community. one thing that every stem kid had regardless of whether we knew each other was this understanding of 1) we never sleep so life basically sucks for us, 2) organic chemistry is the devil, and 3) mendoza kids are so annoyingly lucky. we connected even without knowing each other. some of the best, nicest, and kindest friends i met at notre dame, came from the college of science but now, if i leave it, what happens? worrying for my future never stopped poking me. “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewalcenter for courage & renewal (couragerenewal.org” by parker j. palmermoreau fye week eleven). i had to learn that. even with the switch of paths, my community should be the least of my worries, because if i believe in one, there will be one, ready to present itself to me or at least those were the words that my http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ advisor reassured me with. for the first time, after a very rocky month filled with twists and turns, i felt somewhat okay with my decision, with my path. now, i am still on a path that is unknown yet visible. i try not to dwell on how visible it is because it only stresses me out more but i don’t ignore it completely. as long as it is visible, i believe that god has a plan for my future despite any devilish bumps, blocks, or tactics that the devil may utilize. (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewismoreau fye week twelve). yes, i remain on an unknown road, but a road is still a road, and as long as there is a road, there will be a destination for me. moreau first year experience me, myself, and i these past few weeks have made me go in-depth about my beliefs and my character. before taking this class, i always had moments where i just reflected alone in my room and was thinking about life itself. what was i going to do with my life, how am i carrying my life, am i taking advantage of my time, what can i do right now to have a better future. i always asked questions, but these questions from each assignment in moreau made me feel more open-minded about the world and people themselves. these tapped into my root beliefs at this point in my life. i believe that my purpose is to take advantage of my privilege and find ways to give back to the community. i mainly started having this mindset when i was having an open-mind about what was going on in the world. i wanted to gain different perspectives of certain issues. watching videos, reading articles, talking to people. my attribute of being open-minded started to develop over time as time went on. there weren’t many challenges in tapping into my purpose because i would say the internet has made it easier for me to gain knowledge that a textbook written from someone else can’t tell me. anything that i am curious about, i can just find on google. learning about difficulties in the world and how people struggle to attain the simplest things really made me humble and made me appreciate the life and opportunities i have in this world. in week 3 qqc, there was this particular quote that resonated with me that still sticks with me to this day:”spirituality concerts the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“the role of faith in our story” by pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). such as the spiritual lighting mentioned in the content, i further understand that i perceive the world and treat it in a way that i want it to treat me back. faith does indeed inform me on how i see the world. i feel grateful every day for the life that god gave me. i try to see everything with beauty and purpose. when things get tough, i am always hopeful for a better outcome because i believe in god. i present love by thinking about others and never putting yourself above them. these characteristics shape my view of this world, and faith is indeed my guide throughout my life. in week 2 qqc, there was this quote that caught my attention:“nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore we must be saved by hope. nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any context of history; therefore we must be saved by faith. nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love”(“david brooks: should you live your life for your resume...or your eulogy?”moreau fye week 2). looking at your inner weakness and combating it is a step that everyone can take to achieve their most authentic self. it is something that i needed to do in order to achieve my best inner self and be humble. in week 6 qqc, i stated this certain statement in my poem that connects to my purpose: “i’m from humbleness starting with nothing in mexico to being happy having a home with my family”(“where i’m from” moreau fye week 6). knowing where i come from makes me feel more humble with the life i have right now. it correlates with my purpose because it gives me motivation to strive to give back to the ones who don’t have the same opportunity as me. i believe that i am responsible for the connections i have in this world. i can build chemistry with the right people and know when a relationship needs to end when it needs to at me, myself, and i this point. in week 1 qqc, there was this particular thing said by breme brown that made me pause and think about it twice: “these folks, very simply, dared to be imperfect. they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others”(the power of vulnerability by brene brown moreau fye week 1). throughout the majority of my life, i was very nervous and self-conscious of how i look, my mannerisms, and just in general what i was going to add to the conversation. i feel like to this day it still sticks with me, but i don't show it as often as i used to. approaching people from different backgrounds can definitely be tough sometimes, but i always just think of the positives that will come out of the conversation. in week 4 qqc, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term”(5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). i would say taking the steps to understand what unhealthy relationships are will get me to that goal of having to forge life-giving relationships. just taking a step back and understanding the red flags in my relationships will help me avoid them, deal with them better, and make me have more time to meet with other people with the same values as me. i believe that i pursue truth by looking at different perspectives instead of relying on just one. in qqc 7, ngozi said something that stuck with me: ”amid a controversy, it’s important to remember that implicit bias is real—and it matters”(“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). a thing we can do to pursue the truth is not relying on one side's perspective. i feel as though this creates assumptions and makes people seperate from the actual truth. people rely on that one source of information and stick with it without actually taking the time to see it themselves and experience it. in qqc 5, kevin grove stated something that really enlightened me: “faith and reason together place us always in a relationship to each other”(“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by kevin grove moreau fye week 5). getting to understand other people's perspectives can make me open-minded on issues that i am not knowledgeable about and make me thrive in tackling those issues. moreau integration one moreau integration one assignment october 15, 2021 my root beliefs blossoming through the notre dame experience i believe that my purpose is to help others. throughout my life, i have always felt the most purposeful when my actions have been targeted towards the wellbeing of others. in school, certain subjects have grasped my attention throughout the years, and i have followed many different interests, but i have always felt the most driven when my work has been targeted towards the greater good. for example, i did several service projects throughout high school, and i volunteered at a variety of nonprofits, and that was the type of work that made me feel whole. throughout my college experience so far i have tried to follow this passion through getting involved in different clubs. i joined a club called impact for innovation, which works with an all girls school in uganda to help young women receive an education that they would not otherwise have access to. as of now, i have been working with the marketing team to explore different ways in which we can raise money for the school and bring awareness to the overarching issues regarding women’s education in uganda. on a smaller scale, i have also been following this passion of helping others by simply doing what i can to make my peers feel comfortable with adjusting to college. i was fortunate enough to make friends fairly quickly upon arriving at school and i have been handling my class workload pretty well, but some people have been struggling in those departments. in high school these were two things i often struggled with, and so i would not want anyone else to feel that same burden weighing on them. for this reason, i have been making an extra effort to get to know everyone, invite them to any plans or simply to get food at the dining hall, and help them with any class material that is challenging them. in doing so, i feel that i have been able to make everyone’s transition to college a little easier, and i have felt purpose in being here. for our first week, we watched a ted talk that said “connection is why we’re here. it gives purpose and meaning to our lives,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). well, doing what i can to help others is how i feel connected to those around me, and therefore how i have found my purpose in life. when we took our via surveys for week two, my signature strength was kindness, which i honestly was not surprised by (via character strengths survey by via adult survey moreau fye week two). although i was flattered and took that as a compliment, i was also able to recognize that spreading kindness and helping others is what makes me feel alive and purposeful, so it makes sense that it is one of my strengths. i believe that i pursue the truth by broadening my perspective. this is a core belief that i have had ever since i can remember. i think that chimamanda ngozi adichie articulated the basis of this belief really well when she was explaining the idea of a single story, and how, “to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me. the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story,” ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). oftentimes, people look at me through a very narrow perspective. they only see what is on the surface, and do not make an effort to search any deeper, so i feel that they do not know who i truly am and their vision of me is warped. writing my “where i’m from” poem for week 5 made me really consider who i am on the inside, and the side of me that people fail to consider https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i chose not to write about this in my personal poem, but this activity made me think of how my home life has shaped me. my family has experienced many hardships, which is one aspect of my life that people do not really consider. part of my single story causes people to think i have this perfect, cookie-cutter life. however, that is not necessarily the case. because of this, i know how it feels for people to look at you through a fixed perspective, and how that can lead one far away from the truth. so, i believe that in order to know someone’s full truth you must get to know them from a broader perspective. going into college, i have tried to do this. with everyone i have met so far, i have ignored any initial assumptions i may have made in order to get to know everyone for who they really, truly are. i believe that god is always with me, whether i can sense him or not. this is a belief that i have gradually been developing. this is because during challenging times i’m life, it can be difficult to sense god’s presence, and it can feel like he is nonexistent, but i have realized that during those times he is simply working in the background. professor david fagerberg said that, “normally, i should be able to see the real world around me, and the neighbor with whom i should be concerned. but if the lighting is wrong, i will see myself instead,” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week three). i think that during these times of hardship where i have doubted god, i focused too much on myself in the moment and not the greater picture. this is when i failed to sense god’s presence and doubted his existence. however, i have begun to broaden my perspective and understand that every negative thing that’s happened to me has led to a greater long-term good, and that specifically is why god presented me with such obstacles in the first place. so, even when it feels like i have been abandoned or forgotten by him, i am now able to realize that whatever is going on in my http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 life has a greater purpose. carla harris said, “failure always brings a gift, and that gift is experience,” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). when i first got gateway, i felt like a failure and i felt as though god was neglecting all that i had worked for. after two months of school, i now realize that gateway was truly a hidden gift, and that it was just part of god’s greater plan for me. so, even when i feel ignored by god, i have been able to learn that he is still there but just adding some unexpected twists in my journey to reach a positive end destination. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships through being my authentic self rather than who society says i should be. in many of my past relationships, i have shaped myself into who i thought others wanted me to be rather than who i truly am inside. whether that meant dressing, talking, or acting differently, i would change what was natural for me in an attempt to please others. however, i have noticed that these relationships never lasted long, and that i never felt connected to anyone when altering the way i projected myself. this is because i was not being my full, authentic self. in her ted talk, dr. brown explains that people formed the deepest connections when “they were willing to let go of who they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do for connection,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). looking at every long-lasting relationship i have had, whether it be with my closest friends or my family, those are the relationships where i ignored who i was “supposed” to be and just acted as myself. an article we read week four described healthy relationships as “the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). this is how i feel when i am my authentic self in a relationship, and so i can only truly form life-giving https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing relationships by refraining from hiding who i am on the inside in order to fit societal standards, and by embracing what makes me unique. so far in my college experience, i have tried my best not to hide my true personality, which honestly has been a little scary. it has put me in a vulnerable position because if people do not like me, then i know that they do not like me for who i really am as a person. however, so far everyone has accepted me for who i am, and so i feel that i have already been able to make long-lasting friendships. encountering challenges and prioritizing health week 9 of moreau became very relevant to my life towards about the third quarter of the first semester. i struggled with feeling like i was losing the friends i had begun to make earlier in the year. i felt left out and like everyone else was growing closer to each other, and as they grew closer, they forgot about me. i completely related to “[t]he worst part was that i felt as if i were the one who was this lonely” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week nine). things began to get better as i grew closer to other people on campus. one of the most important questions that i have had to consider this year is “which relationships in my life are worth putting all of my energy into?”. i realized that some of the friendships i had begun were making me feel worse overall rather than better. i realized that as i put more energy into those friendships and feeling included in those relationships, the worse i felt. i actually began to connect this week of moreau to week 4 moreau’s discussion of unhealthy relationships. i realized that some of the people i had considered friends would say and do things that were hurting me. i began to prioritize my own mental health and the relationships with the people that i enjoyed spending time with and did not feel hurt after. i have learned that sometimes it is okay to walk away when people are hurting you. i know now how to work to be better at balancing the amount of energy that i put into friendships. week 10 of moreau discusses discourse, specifically political discourse, but i think discourse in general actually has an interesting connection to my connection of weeks 9 and 4 in the previous paragraph. fr. jenkins reminds us “[f]irst we cannot directly reduce anyone else’s hatred. if we were capable of reducing the hatred of others, we would have already done it” https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten). originally, in my discussion of this idea, i had looked at it as being more about conviction than about hatred. i had agreed that it is almost impossible to change a person’s opinion about a topic if their conviction is strong enough. i had said we should instead look inward and identify the flaws within our own actions and opinions. however, bringing in the situation from the previous paragraph, i have realized that i have somewhat changed my opinion. i have realized that sometimes confronting others is necessary. it is complicated and very situation dependent; however, there are times when calling others out is necessary. i think for many people it is a lot easier to stand up to someone in defense of another person, especially when they love that person and want to protect them. it can be a lot harder to stand up to others when it is in regard to ourselves. i know that is how it is for me at least. however, i have begun to realize that it can be both okay and necessary to confront people when they are incorrect and do something to wrong you. while i have learned to accept this fact, i am still working towards actively standing up for myself and implementing this fact in my life. i did however find friends that i could turn to for help. they are a great group, and i know we are all there to support each other. sometimes, though, it can be easy to forget that i need their support, and that i cannot do everything on my own. “when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). however, it is beginning to become clearer to me that i need my friends for support both in the good times and the bad times. true friends celebrate with you when you are up and lift you up and support you when you are down. that is also how the notre dame community is. this community cheers its members https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ on during their good days and supports their members when they are down. they work to create a space where everyone is welcome and supported. i want to work on continuing to remember that i have my friends’ support in both the good times and the bad times. it is easy for me to believe that when i am doing well, it is my own doing, when in reality it is due to my friends’ help. while we are struggling, it can be hard to remember to turn to the people here who are supporting us; it can be even harder to remember to turn to someone who it can be easy to forget that he is always here, god. “hence the prayers offered in the state of dryness are those which please him best” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). notre dame offers amazing reminders for people to turn back to god when they are struggling. personally, with school getting busier and finals week coming up, i have found a lot of peace in visiting the grotto and attending mass. at first, making time for mass was stressful. i felt like i did not have enough time to both go to mass, finish my work, and take care of myself. balancing schoolwork, eating, and sleeping had been difficult already. i made the conscious effort to finish enough of my homework so that i could go to mass on sunday. i remembered how calming and nice it was to go pray with the community and spend time with god. while i feel a little stressed initially about going to mass and getting my work done, going to mass helps me to slow down and calm down. however, for me, i actually find it easier to turn to god when i am struggling than when i am doing well. much like my friends, i forget that i have them, god, and a community surrounding me when i am doing well. connecting the topics that we have learned in class and the different sources we have investigated in moreau has really taught me lessons that will help me to improve my life and improve myself. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192618?module_item_id=109295 microsoft word week 13 integration two .docx notre dame’s non-academic lessons in september, the difference between college and high school came to me as a shock. the freedom that came with living with friends in the dorm made it hard for me to learn time management. the social and cultural atmosphere of the school was far different from high school and definitely an adjustment i had to get used to. during this first semester at notre dame, i have encountered challenges in staying connected to my roots, coming to terms with people i am dissimilar to, and keeping a positive attitude in stressful times. being far away from taiwan and things related to my culture made it difficult for me to stay connected. before coming to notre dame, this was never really a challenge. although, i went to an international school in taiwan, i was still able to stay connected to my culture because i was close with family. for example, during lunar holidays, many malls and streets would be decorated. it would be difficult to forget about these holidays when i was back home. however, it was hard for me to keep up with the holidays my family was celebrating back home when i am far away. back in high school, it was also easy to stay connected with language. outside of school, the primary language was mandarin. so, it was simple for me to practice using the language if i wanted to. it was upsetting to me at first when i started to notice my mandarin become less fluent here. i felt like i was parting from the culture i had grown up with. i responded to these changes by trying to facetime my parents as much as possible and forcing myself to speak mandarin with them. it also allows me to know what they are up to and stay reminded of life back home. something i noticed about myself when overcoming this challenge is my increased pride in where i was raised. when i first got to notre dame, i felt the need to prove that i was “american” enough since i did not grow up in america. now, i am proud to have grown up in taiwan and have a unique cultural background. in relation to week 11’s assignment about encountering community, the quote i chose for this tells us “i think everybody at least you should be more curious and not treat other people like an alien if we're not an american.” (“with voices true snapshot summary” (klaus center archive on race) – moreau fye week eleven) i think this was especially relatable to me and to this challenge i encountered because over time i realized how i should not have had to “prove” myself to everyone at notre dame. although this issue is still one that needs to be improved on at notre dame, i am proud that i am not alone in dealing with this and i learned to appreciate my background as i connected with my roots. another challenge i encountered was connecting with people i was dissimilar to. when i first got to notre dame, i was pretty adamant about my own beliefs and judged people who were different. coming to college, i realized that there were people who had beliefs vastly different from mine. in high school, which was about 850 students, almost everyone was the same. and if they did not believe what the general population did, they usually kept quiet. it was strange to me that there were people who had such strong religious and political beliefs that were almost opposite to mine. at the beginning of the year, if i knew that someone had opposite or even just different beliefs to me, i would unconsciously stray away from them. as the year went on, i realized i had to stop judging people by their beliefs. it became clearer to me that even if i do not agree with their beliefs, they can be nice people and i did not have to distance myself so much. in my opinion, week 11’s qqc was insightful in offering advice and reflection on the way i dislike being treated differently for dissimilarities, and thus how i should treat others when faced in the same situation. lastly, over the semester i struggled with staying positive and hopeful during stressful times of the school year. although i had experienced stress as well in high school, the independence we have in college is an extra load on my plate that i had to learn to handle. during heavy days where there are a lot of assignments due or a lot of midterms, it can be hard to stay positive and hopeful. for instance, the 2 weeks before thanksgiving, i was so stressed over the amount of work i had to do for upcoming exams. i had not done that well in classes earlier in the semester and had a lot to do to bring up my grades. i felt a lot lonelier since i was always on the move studying or working on something else. as cheesy as it sounds, i thought about week 12’s qqc about encountering hope. i was inspired by father moreau’s story and how he saw the light in dark times. (“holy cross and christian education” – moreau fye week twelve) in order to overcome the challenges i was facing, i worked hard to focus on myself and stay motivated despite it being difficult. i made sure i was taking care of myself while getting my work done well. when it felt lonely, i tried to cheer myself up by thinking about my future goals. in week 12’s qqc, we learned about father moreau’s courageous journey to creating an educational outlet in the united states. despite the hardships he faced, he persevered to reach his goals successfully. overall, this semester has taught me a lot about myself. i think that the materials we have gone through in moreau have also allowed me to reflect and improve myself through the challenges college has put me through. moreau qqcs have also helped me gain inspiration, advice, and comfort when encountering in staying connected to my roots, coming to terms with people i am dissimilar to, and keeping a positive attitude in stressful times. despite the realizations i have made so far, i am still a work in progress and believe there is much more that my notre dame experience will teach me. christopher giaimo moreau first year experience mr. retartha due march 4th a life well lived influences beyond the grave since the start of the second semester i have been asked to complete seven weeks worth of qqc reflections. compared to my first semester of moreau, i much rather prefer the questions that i am being asked now. these questions which all revolve around what a “good” life is is something that fascinates me because in the end that’s all that really matters. when i am nearing the end of my life, it won’t matter what clothes i wore, what people i impressed, but rather the impact that i left on the world around me. in this assignment, i will address what i believe to be a “good” life, define the way that i want to be remembered, and will give a eulogy that i would be fortunate enough to receive later in my life if i deserve it one aspect of my life that this course has led me to evaluate further is my experiences with technology. technology is obviously extremely prevalent in today’s world and is only becoming more important. however, sometimes i question whether or not technology brings more good than it brings bad: “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” ( "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). teenagers today have been mentally crippled by their dependence on social media. rather than seek personal happiness and truth my generation seeks for internet validation from random people on the internet. people only post the highlights of their lives on social media leading to a very harmful perception for those viewing these highlights. with regards to having a “good” life, i believe that the internet has a heavy influence. to have a “good” life you must also embrace the bad; there cannot be good without bad. i hate the fake standards that social media sets and i look forward to bettering myself everyday regardless of what everyone else is doing. my favorite qqc that we did this semester came in week 2 when we discussed one of the primary ideas of this paper: what makes a life well-lived? when you think about famous individuals who have become icons and role-models of what the ideal life looks like, who do you think of? for me, individuals like martin luther king jr., gandhi, and jesus stand out. all of these people had profound effects on the people around them. while i am nowhere near these inspirational people, i do try and follow some of their ideas. helping others has to be one of my favorites. back home i would volunteer at soup kitchens and at my local church to help those less fortunate than me. not only are you helping people through actions like this, but i firmly believe that it benefits you as well. my favorite quote from week two pertains to this idea: “success comes from the power of friendship” ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). building relationships with others around you is a key way to build yourself up. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 over the course of last semester and the first half of this semester, i have faced countless difficulties. while these difficulties are miniscule compared to the unfortunate situations that many have, they are difficulties nonetheless. living with completely random people, getting used to a foreign environment, and making new friends are a few that i can mention off the top of my head. as stated by kelly clarkson “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” this similar idea could be found in week 3 when we watched a video of a nun who encouraged people to embrace the challenges that they face including the most difficult challenge of them all: we must face the fact that we all will die. the nun proclaimed “but it;s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ( "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three) and i wholeheartedly agree with her. these challenges build character which help you later in life and gets you closer to your goal of living a “good” life. early on into my college experience, i have felt the nagging pressures that choosing a major has. i fear that if i make the wrong decision, i could spend the rest of my life doing something that i absolutely despise. that is why after reading this quote i gained a little bit of a sense of comfort in the idea that i am not alone: “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” ( “navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) moreau fye week 4). while i do understand the fact that a major is important, i also recognize that it is not the sole factor determining my future. this sense of accepting things that are out of your control has been a really big problem for me my whole life. starting by accepting some major truths such as the fact that life is what i make of it, i can become a better person that has principles that he stands for. another week of class that i especially enjoyed was that of week 5, when rather than do a traditional qqc, we had a deep conversation with our friends. sometimes those things are hidden so well by yourself, that it takes talking to someone else to bring out thoughts or ideas which you have had hidden. i found that amongst my friends we had similar traits, hobbies, and things that we cared for. for example, we all liked to play basketball, but one of my friends prefers cards. this idea that everyone is unique is a special advantage that everyone has. this idea of uniqueness reminds me of a quote from last semester: “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage. nobody can be you the way that you can be you” ( “2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five (last semester)). these distinct qualities are things that allow all individuals to have a “good” life. if people were just copying one another they would not be having “good” lives but rather boring lives. this uniqueness fosters identity and promotes personal growth. week six of our semester went hand in hand with week three with regards to challenges in life. specifically, i mentioned early that my hardships were nothing compared to those who have suffered tragedies. one such individual was shown to us during this week who was paralyzed. this man was put into the darkest situations imaginable as he attempted to commit suicide. however, he explains that while it is human nature to search for the easy way out, the path with more challenges is oftentimes more beneficial: “we tend to search for the easiest and https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://news.nd.edu/news/carla-harris-2021-laetare-address/ https://news.nd.edu/news/carla-harris-2021-laetare-address/ most plausible answers” ( “5 minutes” aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week 6). i will not deny that i fall victim to this mindset sometimes whether that be in school, the gym, in sports or any other situation. we hate challenges because they put us in uncomfortable positions. however, adapting to these conditions is a trait that i consider the most inspirational people to have. life is hard. it seems like it is out to get you sometimes, but you got people by your side. parents, siblings, friends, teachers, coaches, and many more are just a few examples of individuals who push us to be better everyday. week seven focused on these relationships because at the end of the day relationships are what makes humans humans. these relationships provide goals and motivation that sometimes may be lacking. while some may claim it, no one ever makes it anywhere alone. a quote that i found from that week resonated with me because i felt that it was very applicable to our political situation today: “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another ‘you,’ and another ‘you,’ and it turns into an ‘us’” ( “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). while it may be easy or tempting to blame others for your problems, if we work together things would get done a lot faster. now i am going to write my ideal eulogy: today we say goodbye to a man who never gave up. in a world filled with so many distractions, chris represented determination and unity. there was never a day where he woke up and did not want to be the best possible version of himself. i had the pleasure of knowing him and it truly saddens me to the passing of such a dedicated man. he was not perfect, he made mistakes and sometimes failed to become a better person everyday. however, he always learned from these mistakes and never made the same mistake twice. recognizing failure and acknowledging it is the bravest thing that a man can do. may he rest in peace in a better place and may we strive to better ourselves everyday like he tried. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript looking back on it all this is it, the final moreau assignment (at least for this semester) it’s crazy how fast everything has gone by and yet so much has happened as well. so much change and new ideas and perspectives. so many new people and stories and joys and problems and sometimes looking back it can feel a little overwhelming. it’s funny, because i know if i were to be asked on the spot about what happened over the last semester, i doubt i’d be able to give a good answer. looking back to when i was first walking through the doors to my dorm i didn’t really have that many expectations. similarly to how the article advised in week 9, (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) i was just willing to take it all in. i think that this was pretty healthy, although there were definitely some things i probably should have figured learned to expect prior to entering campus. (knowing that rotc would have me waking up at 5 every monday and wednesday so i could plan my schedule accordingly would be one of them.) despite the hiccups along the way, i’m here at basically the end of the semester, and i’m doing fairly well. i say fairly well, as with all things there come other things that we would rather do without. i would say problems, but that word comes with an implication that there could be a solution. when the people next door to me want to throw a party until peridals when i want to just go to sleep, there’s only so much i can do. in week 10 the topic was encountering brokenness where we covered some of these issues within our communities. in response to the article (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr john jenkins moreau fye week ten) i talked about how it’s been a lot harder for me to act on some of these issues since i’ve gotten to college. i recognize that a large part of this is that i’m at a new place with a lot of new systems that i am unfamiliar with. in high school, i was president of the student government and i knew a lot of people, so it was much easier for me to act on things i noticed within my community. i also was mostly happy and certain with myself and where i was at the time so i could focus more of my effort and energy towards my community. in rotc we had a lesson on leadership and how a leader is basically someone who can convince and compel us to do things we otherwise would not want to do. this directly parallels one of the articles we talked about in week eleven, (“thirteen ways of looking at a community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) which said “ironically, we often resist leaders who call upon our resourcefulness.” it's really difficult being a leader, as you are the person who will take the fall if one of the people you’re leading does something wrong. but also you can’t just crush everyone below you with an iron fist because then no one will follow you. additionally as a leader, you’re also a teacher. those below you, whether you like it or not, are going to look up to you. this dynamic drastically changes depending on the number of people you are leading. i worked as a private tutor throughout the latter half of my time in high school, and with the one on one sessions, i could gauge how the kid i was tutoring was doing very easily, and i could recognize when he was just exhausted from all of his other commitments. whereas when i volunteered to teach at a local elementary school, it was a lot more challenging to not only gauge all of the kids’ abilities, but also to challenge them sufficiently. it’s such a difficult balance to be an excellent leader, or a person that not only will inspire others but will also challenge them to work hard and be committed to your cause. i remember times in high school, and even for some of my classes now that it feels like the teachers don’t know or care that we have other classes or commitments and will pile on assignments, which really puts pressure on the students, or the people being led. it makes us really have to prioritize our commitments, and for some people, that incentivises simply dropping a commitment, maybe a class or a club so they can focus on more. there’s so much emphasis on specialization now, it feels somewhat unnerving every now and then. it feels like i’m sliding closer and closer to different boxes, different options that i have to choose. i know it’s not that simple and that there are options where i can do many things, but at what point is that just another niche that i would be filling? with that feeling of sliding, it seems easy to get into a mindset of hopelessness, or that that’s just the way it is. it might be in vain, but i’d like to fight against it as long as i can. i like having options and being able to express and explore different aspects of myself and my communities. i like learning new things about the world and the people around me. in all of the articles from week twelve, hope was framed around faith. one such example was in (“holy cross and christian education” by fr james b. king moreau fye week twelve) which stated, “we yearn to look out upon the world like the awestruck shepherds who gazed in wonder at mary’s newborn son and, during more difficult times, to emulate the friends who stood by her decades later as she stared at his cross willing herself to trust in god’s promise.” i know there are ideas that don’t involve faith that can be drawn from the texts but the author’s intention is clear to me. i think that these texts are great for those that can draw hope from them, but i am not one of those people, and that’s okay. it isn’t always easy to see, but i find hope in looking into the future. i see my possibilities and dream of the things i could do, or heights i could reach. i also find hope in knowing that there are people that i inspired. hearing about people from my high school who want to follow my example, or by parts of my community that i was able to make an impact on give me hope. they inspire me, knowing that i have done good encourages me to continue doing things so i can keep doing good and give hope to those around me. moreauintegration2 first semester and beyond in my time here at notre dame so far, i’ve encountered a community that has welcomed and embraced me in a new environment. i’ve encountered genuine people that have wanted to get to know me. i have adapted very quickly to this new environment, but i know that if i have a question or concern, there is always someone that would be happy to answer or help out. i’m loving the dorm culture on campus, as it’s been a great avenue to meet people that i know will have my back for the next 3.5 years. joining the notre dame community has had a great positive impact on my personal growth and development. as the class of 2025 transitions into notre dame, there have obviously been some large changes to our environment and lifestyle. personally, i have found these changes to be beneficial and liberating in a sense. i’ve been able to adjust my sleep schedule, which is pretty important for my mental health, and that has been a great change. since i tend to be a night owl and do my work later at night, i like that i can get more sleep (compared to high school) while maintaining that schedule. another large change that has stood out to me is the difference in my social life. back in high school, i would stick with my close friends and not branch out socially much. here, the dorm community brings people from all places and backgrounds together, and as a result i’ve been putting more effort into getting to know other guys from stanford. it’s interesting to meet all these people that have so much variation in their life experiences, or in the words of fr. jenkins, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed that you would end up where you are today” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. jenkins moreau fye week ten). the wide range of personalities and backgrounds randomly thrown together in a building somehow creates a community that is collaborative, communicative, and https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ spirited, and i find that to be an awesome part of notre dame. the community includes everyone, including “strangers i will never meet… people with whom i share local resources and must learn to get along (e.g., immediate neighbors)... to people i am related to for the purpose of getting a job done (e.g., coworkers and colleagues)” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau week eleven). throughout this semester, i’ve tried to put an emphasis on participating in this community, and i have been welcomed heartily. i’ve also encountered an academic environment that supports personal intellectual growth. i’ve found that many of my classes are structured so that students do not need to solely focus on their grades, but instead focus on truly understanding the material, which will inherently result in better grades. for example, my calc class uses a testing system where you have to get 3 out of 5 attempts correct for a concept, which allows you to still earn full credit if you did not initially understand the concept. in that class, the exams and quizzes are less stressful, and i think the system has helped me learn from my mistakes faster as a result. with this general academic attitude, i’ve set fewer unreachable personal goals in terms of academic success. throughout high school, i set lots of unrealistic and unreachable expectations for myself, and the issue with these expectations is that “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). from experience, i know that these unrealistic expectations truly can backfire, either in terms of workload and/or stress, and they almost never are beneficial. with less unrealistic goals, i’ve found it a bit easier to focus directly on the work itself instead of thinking more about the goal. at my time here so far, i have not encountered much in terms of personal adversity, but “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau week twelve). academically, my classes are easier and less work than my junior and senior years of high school, which has surprised me greatly, but i know that right now is as easy as it will ever be. i’m genuinely interested in many of the classes that i will take within the next 4 years, and i’m excited to reach classes actually regarding my major. as i’ve said, the notre dame community has been incredibly welcoming and supportive, and i’ve only had good experiences with other students and faculty. for the most part, everything has been smooth sailing so far, although i know there will be challenges ahead. despite these challenges to come, i think that my personal growth will only be accelerated here with the support that is readily available. i’ve always had a focus on personal growth and improvement, particularly with things like habits and time management, and my habits here are pretty reasonable and healthy. in the first few weeks here, i put extra effort into creating and upholding good habits, particularly in terms of time management, and while that effort has faded somewhat by now, i still am aware of and adjusting my habits. for example, i’ve been using certain blocks of time between classes as consistent times to study. just in my singular semester here already, i feel like i’ve gained a lot of knowledge and experience that will prove invaluable in time. i’ve begun calling this place home, which hurt my parents just a little, but it really does feel like home to me. i’ve loved my experience at notre dame so far, and i think this place will have a great positive impact on my personal growth during my 4 years, but more importantly i hope it will help me continue that growth for years to come. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 integration 1 be vulnerable to sharing your authentic self everyone has a set of core values and beliefs that guide them through life. these may change over time as we gain knowledge and have new experiences. looking back at my life, there are 3 root beliefs that i have developed and that have shaped me. i believe that you must be open to vulnerability in order to grow, i believe that everyone should have a place where they are free to voice their opinions, and finally, i believe you should live life for yourself and not for anyone else. my first root belief is that i believe you must be vulnerable to grow. coming to college is a big change for everyone and it is the time of many firsts. it is also the time you meet many people and make connections with different types of people and build a sense of community. as father pete says, “the growth that you’ve had at notre dame was not by accident, nor was it a solo event” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). personal growth often heavily depends on the people around you and your relationships with them. in order to make the most of these relationships and the community, you must be willing to open yourself up and be vulnerable with others. this way you can share both the positive and negative moments in a meaningful way, as well as be someone the other person feels comfortable sharing with. this is important not only for my root belief of growth stemming from vulnerability, but also cultivates my second root belief of creating a safe space for someone to be able to voice their view and ideas freely. brene brown also touches on the importance of vulnerability. she mentions that allowing yourself to be vulnerable is what leads to joy and love by allowing us really feel our emotions to connect and share them with others (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). being able to be vulnerable enough to recognize, feel, and share our emotions with others is a big part of emotional growth. in the past i have often tried to avoid feeling emotions, or been bad at recognizing them. however, i have learned through others sharing their emotions with me that it is okay to be vulnerable and feel emotions, whether they are good or bad, and am trying to be more honest about them to both myself and others. the second root belief i have is that everyone should have a place where they are free to voice their opinions. everyone has their own story to tell, and everyone has had different experiences and perspectives growing up. the wide range of perspectives is what makes a community such as notre dame, or a city such as new york city, such a rich environment and one that fosters growth. growing up in new york city, i have had the privilege of hearing and learning from people of many different racial, cultural, and socioeconomic backgrounds. while writing my “where i’m from” poem, i realized how impactful certain things like my culture were on shaping my worldview, and how some peoples have vastly different things that have formed their perspectives (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). since people have such different things to bring to the table, i believe everyone should be able to share their opinions and perspectives freely. sadly, this is often not the case due to predujices and internal biases. even though we may not even realize it, we often have internal biases present, which may make people uncomfortable sharing their opinions on certain things. much of the time we are only predisposed to one perspective. an example used by adichie in her tedtalk is about mexicans being framed as “abject immigrants” by the media (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this leads to many people seeing them this was without truly looking at the other side or getting the mexican perspective of things. when people do this, it only feeds into internal biases. instead, i believe we should strive to seek out multiple perspectives. this emphasizes the importance of my belief about creating a safe space for people to share their perspectives so that we can all work to eliminate internal biases, and create a better and more open community where everyone can be comfortable sharing their views. the final root belief i have is that i believe you should only live life for yourself and no one else. in today’s society, especially with social media, there is often the pressure to live a “perfect” life and be like the people we see online. this especially impacts teenagers, and frequently, people fall into the trap of living to be like someone else rather than their “authentic selves.” this is also often related to wanting to fit in. i myself had fallen into this trap in high school, specifically as a freshman. i had been focused on trying to fit in finding a group of friends, i didn’t realize i had been losing myself while doing so. i had been changing who i was in order to fit in rather than fining the group where i felt like i belonged. this mentality could also be dangerous as it can lead you into toxic friendships. if someone senses that you will do anything to try and fit in with the group, they can take advantage of this and use you to get what they want. this is one of the red flags that your in a toxic friendship (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). by having a mentality of doing what you want rather than what someone else wants you to do, you could avoid these types of situations, and form healthy friendships. when we discussed this idea of fitting in versus belonging in class, it made me realize it is important to be fully myself in college. i did not want to be like my highschool self and change to fit it, i wanted to be myself and live life they way i want to. the idea of being your authentic self is also mentioned by carla harris in her speech. she says “there is only one you, your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). our individuality is one of our strengths, and our differences are what build a diverse and enriching community, therefore i believe it is important that people embrace follow their own paths and do what makes them happy as it is beneficial to themselves and the people around them. societal pressures do not only affect teenagers, but also persist through adulthood. the pressure to be successful in life is often instilled in us as kids. however, successful is often synonymous with wealth or power in the case of occupation. as a result some people go into careers they believe will make them successful rather than happy. david brooks has a similar argument with his ideas of adam i and adam ii. he states “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). in other words, society mainly recognizes for people for their accomplishments rather than their character. for this reason, many people choose to follow the path of success rather than what they want. they are living for society rather than themselves. however, i believe this doesn’t lead to a happiness. i believe it is better to live for yourself and the way you want and be satisfied and happy in life, than to be successful in other peoples eyes yet be unhappy and just wallowing through life. microsoft word integration 1 week 8.docx giving to receive root belief 1: i believe that i find fulfillment by giving. during my time at notre dame, i have found myself giving many things. as soon as i got here, i decided that i would have to be brave and reach out to make new friends, and i figured the best way to reach out to new people was by giving because everyone loves to receive things. i mentioned to all the people on my floor that i had plenty of snacks in my room and that the door was always open, so they were more than welcome to stop by to chat and grab a few twizzlers. by the end of that week, the twizzlers were long gone, but i also met some of the people who have become my best friends, and i was the happiest i had been in a long time. soon after, we watched father pete’s video on the role of faith, and this particularly jumped out to me because at one point in the video he said “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of selfdiscovery. on this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be, the person that god has created you to be, but a word of caution, this journey requires a framework.” (“the role of faith in our story” fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois moreau fye week 3), which inspired me to build a framework centered around giving to my community through service because of my belief that giving brings me fulfillment. as time went on, i found other ways to give beyond just snacks and small things. my favorite of these new things to give were jokes and laughter. i’ve always valued humor, so when we were asked to take the character strengths survey for moreau, i wasn’t too surprised to see humor was my number one strength (via character strengths survey https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup moreau fye week 2). seeing the results of this survey only further strengthened my belief that giving is how i find fulfillment because my three top strengths, humor, love, and teamwork, all involved giving in some way shape or form. overall, my time at notre dame so far has taught me that i really do find a lot of joy in comfort in giving both physically and spiritually, and i think that this is a lesson that i will carry with me through the rest of my time here and the rest of my life. root belief 2: i believe that i form my strongest, best relationships through humor and sharing. as i mentioned previously, during my time at notre dame i have found that making others laugh brings me fulfillment, but i also have found that it has resulted in some of my best and strongest relationships here. i think a big part of this is that humor allows us to be vulnerable in a more comfortable way by joking about our vulnerabilities rather than presenting them full on in ordinary conversation, and as brené brown discussed in her video, the key to forming relationships with others is being vulnerable (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 moreau fye week 1). additionally, i’ve found that even ordinary humor can help to open conversations with new people. many of my good friends that i’ve met in my classes came from conversations that started with me cracking a joke during class to break some sort of tension because everyone was too uncomfortable to say anything. furthermore, humor really helps me pick out what relationships are good relationships. i’ve noticed both at home and notre dame that good friends will laugh at even the worst of jokes and do their best to be humorous with you too. in olivia t. taylor’s grotto article, she mentions that 2 of the things that toxic friends tend to do are talk with you only about negative things and not pay full attention to you when you are speaking, and both of these things are especially prevalent with humor (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ moreau fye week 4). i’ve seen that toxic friends tend to not pay attention to the jokes and sometimes won’t even notice that something was supposed to be a joke, and they tend to bring up something negative about these jokes rather than laughing and joining in. beyond just humor, i’ve also found that sharing with prospective friends can really strengthen the bonds you form. for example, the upperclassmen who on my floor who i often shared my snacks with early on, returned and continue to return the favor by introducing me to their friends, teaching me valuable tips and tricks for life on campus, and giving me some of the essential supplies like command strips, paper plates, and other things that i forgot. even more than physically sharing, however, i’ve found that sharing stories with one another also helps to form strong bonds. much like george ella lyon’s “where i’m from” poems enlighten us about her life, stories from friends help me to understand what their lives are like and allow me to be a better friend (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html moreau fye week 6). additionally, much like the stories of father sorin’s early days at notre dame and his desire to build a catholic school to enlighten the masses shaped the character of notre dame as well as its physical shape, the stories of a friend’s adventures often shape their character and beliefs as well as their physical shape with things such as scars having roots in stories (fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/modules/items/107233 moreau fye week 5). for example, a good friend was telling me about his recently passed cousin and pointed out a scar he had on his leg from when they used to go and play in the woods together as kids, and he explained that being in the woods helped foster his love of nature and was why he had three plants on the windowsill in his room. lastly, i’ve learned firsthand that sharing stories can also help build stronger friendships by fostering an environment of understanding and cutting down implicit biases. as chimamanda ngozi adichie says in her video “the danger of a single story,” “when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/u p-next#t-1107548 moreau fye week 7). this was especially applicable to me when i first met a good friend of mine who is from guam. at the time i knew near nothing about the country or its inhabitants, so i pictured it as a smaller less tourist friendly version of hawaii. eventually, he started telling me some stories about living in guam, and i was surprised to hear how much it was like living in the u.s. despite being an island so far away from here. hearing his stories let me stop believing the single story of the nation that i had developed from what little i knew, and i formed a strong friendship with him because by sharing stories, we found out we had a lot in common. during my first halfsemester at notre dame, i have found that my best group of friends have arose from the times that we as a group were able to laugh and make jokes together as well as share both physically and spiritually. i think this has taught me valuable lessons about how to approach forming friendships with people in new environments, and i believe that these lessons will continue to help me form strong, healthy relationships in the near and far future. integration 2 letting my failures guide me to success my college has been both a gratifying and disheartening experience so far. from adjusting to rigorous academic classes to finding my own social group, i have had to make a lot of adjustments and adapt quickly to survive one of the hardest progressions of my life, and it has only been one semester. most specifically, my experience in my moreau first-year experience class has taught me more than i imagined it would when i first heard i was taking an extra one-credit class that i would have to do weekly assignments for. the majority of this knowledge and thoughtful experience that i have gained can be attributed to my moreau teacher as he is extremely good at his job and actually shows that he cares about everyone in his class. however, while the most interesting part of moreau for me was class, i still learned quite a decent amount of information through the learning modules provided to go along with every week of my moreau first experience classes. now that my first semester is coming to an end, i can describe how my experience in college, most specifically at the university of notre dame, and how it has a�ected me and my way of thinking thus far in my young adult life. additionally, i can connect and transfer what i have learned, using these examples of my experiences thus far at the university of notre dame, and construct a clear and distinct connection between what i have been learning in my moreau class both in and out of my classroom. furthermore, i am able to reflect and evaluate my progress in my young adult life towards the prompts and listed learning goals and plans for the future and how i have applied the things that i have learned. i will be elaborating on all of this in this essay. before i arrived at the university of notre dame, i was adamant that i was going to get a job my first semester on campus. i wanted a job for several reasons. firstly, i wanted money, obviously. i did not want to have to rely on my family members at home to have to send me financial assistance every time i wanted to buy something or i felt like there was something i needed. aside from that fact, i have always worked. all through my years of high school, even while playing three di�erent sports throughout every season of the academic school year and being the president of the national honors society, i had a part-time job consistently throughout the year. so, given my history, i wanted the same for my college experience. i knew college was going to be hard but i felt confident in my preparation that would allow me to multitask and manage both responsibilities. given the fact i was in all of the honors classes and ap classes my school o�ered, i was sure that if i could manage a part-time job during those times while playing three sports that i could at least work a few hours throughout the week in college while managing no more than 6 classes. i was undoubtedly wrong. classes were much more than i thought they would be and proved a di�cult task to manage. this result in me having to make a choice. i had to choose to stray away from the comfort of being self-su�cient and not asking for help from my family members that i have had since i turned 16. this was hard for me and it was even harder accepting that i am not automatically able to adjust to things the way i wanted to, especially academically. this took a toll on me for a while but eventually, i realized this experience is only the beginning of my learning curve of life lessons, much like this is only the beginning of my time at the university of notre dame. during this time since i have been at the university of notre dame, this failed experience at giving myself more than i can handle was only one of the many experiences i was forced to analyze my life as i failed at things i had previously only succeeded at. this relates to week 9 of our moreau class. this week focused on personal development to resiliency and imperfection, which was perfect for what i was going through. in the material for the week, one particular quote from a specific video stood out to me. “since that first study, the same thing has been established across gender, race, age, and a huge range of occupations, though it may be more prevalent and disproportionately a�ect the experiences of underrepresented or disadvantaged groups.” ("what is imposter syndrome?" (elizabeth cox, ted-ed) moreau week 9). this video and quote made me realize how normal it was to fail and even succeed but not feel as if it was deserved, especially for a person of color and minority like me. i felt the need to get a job and prove my worthiness because i already felt as if i did not belong and should work that much harder to prove my place. i was then able to relate my development as a young adult to my own failures or imperfections, a skill i will need as i pursue higher education after graduating from the university of notre dame at the undergraduate level. another goal i was consistently failing at that was making my first semester that much harder was finding the community on campus that was right for me. because i am not a catholic and am a minority in two ways, i found myself nervous and anxious to approach the students around me who fit the part as the perfect student for this university. i found myself unable to understand how to figure out my own path of strengthening bonds of interconnection with others, especially in the midst of conflict https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109145 or dissimilarity, much like the focus question of our week 11 moreau material. in this material, i read a quote that stated “the most common connotation of the word “community” in our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap. ” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” (parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal) moreau week 11). this made me realize that i was reducing the capacity at which i could find my community to my own culture and demographic. in order to truly embrace the community i have access to around me, i had to be capacious enough to embrace everything and everyone. after this, i was better able to acclimate to not only my large campus community but to strangers i would talk to on my way to the dining hall. this furthered my social skills and built my ability to adjust, which are fundamental life and career skills. once i adjusted into the community, i wanted to better structure my life around protecting and making an e�ort to build our community. our moreau week 10 focused on being able to identify and respond to the challenges of the community. in this week there was an article that touched upon the interconnectedness of religion and race. the quote “catholic social teaching demands that we teach students what racism is and why and how to oppose it” ( “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” (christopher j. devron, s.j., america magazine) moreau week 10) elaborates on the ideas both socially and religiously that notre dame should promote. so, as a woman and a person of color, i understand the university of notre dame’s climate socially can be both toxic and intimidating. however, as a student at this school, even though i may not be catholic, i know i have to make the e�ort to make it more enjoyable for all the students that are just like me that will follow in my footsteps. this resilience and determination to make an impact has guided me thus far through my life and will continue to guide me morally while i take on a challenging career field, constructed for the demographic that makes up the majority of this country. while i am not catholic i am able to say i identify with the standard publicized catholic ideas. i often find that i have many things in common with not only my catholic peers but also catholic leaders, much like one of the authors from week 12 of moreau. my determination to socially reform my community and my society parallels many catholic leaders’ determination to believe in their god through questioning times. “while neither of [the catholic leaders] beliefs [were] shaken by new discoveries like the scientific theory of natural selection that caused others to doubt the very existence of god, they each recognized the danger of the trend since the onset of http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109192 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109192 enlightenment to compartmentalize theology and rely solely upon human knowledge.” (text: “hope holy cross and christian education” pages 14 16 (fr. james b. king, c.s.c.) moreau week 12) while i may not often understand the theories of religion present in the catholic faith, i know that many catholics’ moral compass aligns with mine despite its religious origin. being able to understand and accept that is a fundamental part of living in a diverse society and contributes to my accepting mindset that will continue to guide my moral compass throughout the rest of my life. this allows me to live and grow in hope for a better future for not only myself but for the generations after me that are to come. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109281 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/109281 professor todd taylor moreau fye 3 december 2021 the road forward as the fall semester ends, and the season of autumn, a season of change, comes to its conclusion, i feel that the moreau integration is a good opportunity to reflect on the change i have experienced while at notre dame. though the time has been short, i think it is essential to recognize that even in such brief intervals momentous change is possible especially in such a new and different environment. to be quite frank, at the beginning of this season and this semester i was struggling with my mental health and my total outlook. however i was able to adapt and learn by keeping an open mind and absorbing the new information and opportunities that presented themselves to me. after identifying who i am and what my root beliefs are, i have been able to grow from this foundation by confronting what pains me on a personal level and what affects us as a society and derive from my own existence the promise to better myself true hope and unshakeable dignity. i have encountered within myself a huge knot of fear. i am desperately afraid that i will not live up to my potential. i want to be able to change the world around me for the better, however this vague goal seems often at times unattainable, especially under the weight of a heavy schedule that threatens to crush me. the words of julia hogan really struck me as she described people who essentially see themselves as failures because they are unable to do exactly as they wish, they feel weak and powerless. she says, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) i too often feel that i must be perfect and of course like any normal human being i fall far short of this unattainable goal. i feel like those around me are somehow mysteriously able to do everything right and i alone am behind and unprepared for the reality of independent life, work, and study. this imposter syndrome and the expectations i foist on myself are simply the distorted shadows of ideals that make me who i am. because i want to be the best possible version of myself, i expect perfection unfairly, and this dissonance in my identity distorts my perception of others. however, this semester especially i am slowly adjusting my perspective to be more accurate and help myself succeed without antagonizing myself with expectations. when i got a bad grade on a business law test, i did not beat myself up for it. instead, i committed myself to do better for the next test. i decided to let go of the emotional weight of the mistakes of the past and learn from them in order to make for myself a better future. thus letting go of the weight of my expectations, i was able to move on productively with my semester. as part of my goals for myself, i have realized this semester the necessity of changing one’s own perspective to incorporate those of others. two instances that really helped me to get comfortable doing this was with the kintsugi workshop video and the remarks from the activist in the video about the 2020 civil unrest in the wake of the death of george floyd. i had previously heard about the practice of kintsugi, but the context of the workshop helped me to consider the artform in a new way. the idea of helgeson that mistakes shouldn’t be a source of shame and can be included in us as a source of beauty is something that i had thought about and previously rejected. but considering it with the artwork it began to make more sense: recovering from our own points of breakage, our moments of greatest weakness, and displaying how we have recovered turns the scars from hideous flaws to marks of golden beauty. additionally, during the summer of 2020 i too participated in protests decrying the institutional failures that enabled the death of george floyd, but i disapproved strongly of looting, to me it made no sense and worked against the community. however by maintaining an open mindset when hearing the words of the activist in the video shown in class, my opinion changed quite a lot. i encountered a community that had already been plundered before the looting had started, a broken fragment of the american dream that had been so crushed throughout history, in places such as tulsa, that its edge was sharp and bitter and cut to the core of institutional racism. through her eyes, i was able to see that nothing in those stores mattered, that they were inaccessible, a mockery and a sham of an offer that had never been delivered. i don’t necessarily support looting in times of protest, but i don’t think it is so morally depraved as many in the country, including my former self, seem to think. it is strange how often victims of terrible injustice will lash out in desperation and anger then are blamed entirely for the entire sequence of events. on a personal scale, i have met a gender fluid individual who has become a quite dear friend to me, and shared their opinion on many lgbtq issues. i realized that i had quite a few misconceptions and needed to rectify some of my opinions because they simply weren’t accurate nor fair to some members of the community. their guidance and patience to stick with me as i adjusted was truly inspirational on a human level, but not only that but my change of perspective has led me to view my own straight masculine identity in a new and a more enriching way, and so i have profited as well from my ability to consider new information and adapt my perspective. if i am to help build a better world and live up to my true potential, i will need the help of the insights and opinions of the people around me to encounter brokenness within ourselves and within our communities, and find a way to grow and shine gold from these places. finally, i have been able to improve drastically on my mental health and my total outlook since the mid-autumn by finding hope in the future. in september and october, i felt unable to improve myself, i felt useless and therefore worthless, unable to work towards my goals and repellant to my fellow man. this mindset is obviously false, something i was able to abstractly identify but not escape. i heartily resonated, however, with some words from lewis’s the screwtape letters, “their nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation–the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks” (the screwtape letters by c. s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i was certainly in a trough then, but it made complete sense. things change and swing around and plunge us back into the abyss of our own fears and insecurities, if we are to avoid being shattered by this tumultuous world then we must cling fiercely to hope, the memory of the bright parts of the past and the promise of a better future. so whenever i felt lonely i thought of all the new friends i would make. when i got a bad grade i told myself i could adjust and put in the effort to change them. i took agency back by force. i started a diet and exercise regimen and made a direct effort to talk to some of my acquaintances here so i could get to be friends with them more quickly. i looked into the future and saw myself standing tall, braced against the force of the outside world. i know the winter will be difficult, but now i am excited for this challenge to see how far i’ve come, and to see the vast possibility of self-improvement in front of me. over the course of the semester, i have been broken down and then chosen to build myself back up. however, i have not acted alone in this. though it is under my willpower, i have gained knowledge and help from everybody around me, and even an impetus front the challenging curriculum and schedule from the university. i have seen my own fear and recognized that i cannot kill myself on my way to my goal. i have heard the wisdom of different perspectives, and allowed my own perspective to change accordingly. i have found hope and friendship in a place when i felt worthless stressed. i am ready. i will not shy away from the challenge of the winter, from the course load, from the endless possibility before me. i want nothing more than to set out courageously into my future to grow with the people i’ve found and encounter more along the way, building a community that provides for those who have been injured. cormac mc carthy moreau integration one what makes cormac, cormac? i believe that it is essential for me to focus on my self-improvement and become a better version of myself each and every day. in high school, i didn’t like who i was. i had poor habits, minimal motivation and was constantly unproductive. i isolated myself, automatically forcing myself into a situation where i had a constant negative attitude. i knew i had to make a change. after getting accepted into notre dame, and deciding that i wanted it to be my future university, i wanted to make a change. i didn’t want to carry the same behavior over. i knew by moving far away, and giving myself a complete fresh start, i could be anyone i wanted to be. i realized that i should stop overthinking about what people thought of me. i just needed to do my own things, participate in activities that i like, and that would result in my overall wellbeing. this situation reminds me of dr. brown's ted talk from week one. she said “when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak. when you ask people about belonging, they’ll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded. when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). she is talking about what it’s like to have a negative attitude, which i was stuck in. thankfully, now, i’m working on myself everyday to maintain a positive can-do attitude so i can stay motivated and confident in myself. david brooks solidified this idea even more in his ted talk from week two by saying “in order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i felt like i had a version of myself that i wanted to just completely forget and lose, and now i’m slowly fulfilling and finding myself. it’s hard to truly figure out what makes you feel better about yourself though. so how would someone know how to fix their flaws and make slow changes? self-discovery. in week three, father pete mentions how self-discovery is the greatest journey anyone will ever go on (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week three). to pursue self-discovery, we need to try new things, interact with new people, and challenge ourselves. this allows us to figure out who we are as individuals and what makes us happy. again, this is another step towards my goal of a constant focus on self-improvement. i believe that i am searching for a thriving family. as i mentioned in my where i’m from poem (‘where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six), i grew up in a very broken family. my parents had divorced. before this, at age two, my mother broke up my family by fabricating allegations, preventing my father from seeing me. she then told me that my father was dead. my brother and i were left neglected with her. thank god my dad won full custody after an extremely long battle in the court system and two years of my brother and i not seeing him. even though we lived in a much more supportive and structured household, the absence of a mom, and living in a single-parent household was a challenge. due to this experience, when i’m older, i want to fight to do everything i can to have a great relationship with my wife and kids. i don’t want my kids growing up in a divorced household. i know how it affected me, and i wouldn’t want anyone else to go through that. in week seven, chimamanda ngozi adichie mentions a lot about stereotypes and her past experiences. first she explains that “as a child, i saw jam disappear from the breakfast table, then margarine disappeared, then bread became too expensive, then milk became rationed,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this quote reminded me of my situation from my divorced parents. through the divorce, my dad spent all of his money in legal fees fighting for my brother and i. we survived off spam meat, toast, and banana sandwiches. then, she also mentions stereotypes and it made me wonder if they can really be broken. i feel like divorce has become a normal, common thing and i hope it’s something that can be broken. from this information, you can really see why i believe that i am searching for a healthy future family. i’ve always had trouble understanding why bad relationships happen so often. olivia taylor talks about some simple traits that could hint to a bad friendship. for example, they only talk about negative things, they don’t listen to you, or they use you to get what they want (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). to me, it just seems obvious that if you’re in any negative relationship, that relationship should just be ended for the benefit of all parties involved. from this, since my parents didn’t have a working relationship that could last, why did they even get married? why is it common for people to stick with their toxic relationships? i guess it’s hard to really know. staying on the topic of my mission for family, i believe that my search for family extends out of just biological family. in week five, father grove explains how one of the most important part of how a holy cross education happens is through family (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). one of the most major reasons why i chose notre dame as my university is because of how much i heard how great the community is. within my hall, i’ve met a lot of great people and made a couple really close friends. i think we’ll all be close for a very long time. i think that i’ve been social enough to help bonds form, which makes everyone happy. i’m very thankful for that gift and experiences that notre dame gives. so, in my belief that i am searching for a healthy family, it extends past my future wife and kids. it also includes the people who i am very close with in general. overall, i believe that everyday i’m striving to better myself and that i’m looking for a healthy family. to better myself everyday, i’m going to work on keeping a positive mindset by setting daily goals for myself. this will allow me to feel accomplished, motivated, and push me to work hard. to find my family, i need to keep my close peers close. since being at notre dame, i learned that communication is important. when i feel like there are struggles going on, i need to communicate with those close ones. going to my moreau class taught me that it’s okay to be vulnerable and open. if i can do that, i think i’ll be on a good path for me. integration 2 sanya jain discovering a home away from home my journey at notre dame has been nothing but inspiring in so many different ways. it has shown me the potential i have as well as the willingness of it’s giving community to help me reach my potential. prior to coming to notre dame, i was very skeptical about fitting into the community as i was a non-catholic student. however, ever since i have come to the university, i have learnt to understand the differences, and appreciate the similarities which has made me a very open-minded person. coming to a catholic school as a non-catholic, colored individual was daunting in the beginning. this fear was heightened due to recent events in the united states where racial injustices were witnessed like the george floyd incident. however, to my surprise at the university of notre dame, i was able to find diversity and i was accepted into the community without any racial judgement made by any of my friends. people may have been ignorant towards the indian culture, but i think i haven’t faced any problem in terms of my social or academic life, which was a great relief. notre dame’s community has been open and welcoming which has made my experience more fun. moreover, as time passes i see people as more responsible and aware citizens which i believe is what the world needs right now. moreover, i realised that the commencement address touched on important points which made me feel accepted into the community. one such important quote was “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins.” i couldn’t simply not choose this quote which was a part of the commencement address because it states something so simple, but meaningful. love is the greatest commandment, because it should be the way we live our life to give and receive love. love helps a person grow, love fosters relationships and love paves a happy and good life. while hatred is the poison that spoils the broth. hatred at heart is the sanya jain greatest sin because it makes an emotion as pure as love impure. hatred clouds one’s mind and prevents us from being rational and critical thinkers. (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by office of the president moreau fye week ten) more importantly, reading perspectives and talking to students, especially upper class men really helped me understand the process of adjusting to a new community. all the upperclassmen were very supportive as they shared their experiences, helped me through every obstacle including choosing my classes and making me aware of the new opportunities on campus. “with voices true” articles also gave me a new perspective, which showed me i was not the only one feeling out of place initially and that everyone regardless of their religion or nationality went through the same process. i read an indian perspective from one of those articles because that would be one i would be able to resonate with. i found noble patidar’s story called “framing a positive story” where he speaks about racism back home in the indian community as well as his experience of notre dame where he learnt to accept the differences people have and moved on. this university provides opportunities to us students to create a diverse environment. i surely think that after looking at the various opportunities described by the student voices, i will be part of this change at this university. (“voices true” by university of notre dame moreau fye week eleven) as i became more comfortable with the community around me, i discovered that the strong community actually held the power to change me. the five principles of the university have truly become a part of my beliefs and experiences here . the five principles are mind, heart, zeal, family and hope. the definition of these 5 principles, which form the 5 strong pillars of the university’s character are mentioned below: https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu sanya jain mind: seeking understanding through the integration of faith and reason; heart: discerning our personal vocation in service to the church and world; zeal: enkindling the desire to use our gifts to boldly proclaim god’s word; family: embracing christian community as the context for lifelong formation; hope: trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom (“holy cross and christian education” by notre dame campus ministry moreau fye week 12) * (it was a pdf file and hence the link may not work since it is linked to my canvas account) the university of notre dame aims to influence all their students based on these 5 principles as they think this is what would help them shape individuals that are vital for our future. these 5 principles have influenced my beliefs since i have come here in the following way: the mind which is the most important is not limited to academics only. while the academic essence of notre dame is important to their character, a greater emphasis is placed on using our knowledge and integrating it with faith and understanding. i assumed that the faith they would constantly emphasize on was the catholic faith. however, since i have come here i have realised the various meanings of faith which aren't similarly linked to catholic beliefs. integrating logical reasoning as well as one’s personal beliefs with academic knowledge, is what makes me a critical thinker and at this university i have learnt to think critically and holistically using my mind which is an important tool. the heart is important because it is the origin of emotion. it is the origin of emotions such as love, admiration and respect. using these emotions, this university emphasizes on service which makes us giving and caring humans. through my time at this university, i have been presented with several opportunities to give back to society. for example, operation smile club at notre dame is an international medical charity and notre dame is affiliated with them. this https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465/download?download_frd=1 sanya jain semester on campus there were various events where students got the opportunity to raise funds for the community. not simply clubs, but even residential halls have yearly events where they raise money for organisations that need help. mcglinn hall this year had mcchristmas where we raised money for a school in south bend for the underprivileged. such activities across the semester have helped foster my heart and have taught me the importance of service. zeal is a quality that i have noticed in all students at notre dame. there is always a burning passion in every student to reach their full potential. being a part of such a community where zeal is given so much importance, makes me want to work harder towards achieving my goals. this semester i have been motivated by individuals just by being inspired by their work ethics or passion with which they carry out every activity. the next pillar is family. i think it is fair to agree that unlike any university notre dame provides each student with a residential life that becomes our family not just for the next four years but forever. mcglinn hall has made me feel like i am at home from sister mary always being present to help me out, to the close knit bond between the girls of section 2b to having a big sister at mcglinn. the comfort of a family has always been given to me which has made living at notre dame easier as the emptiness of not having my family has reduced. the last principle is hope. i think this is very different from the others because it is something very personal to each individual and abstract at the same time. hope for me is the hope to turn into an individual that can become a change-maker. using all the 4 principles, i aspire to become a global leader, trend-setter and change-maker. this belief and hope has been fostered by being at notre dame. hence even through these catholic principles, i have been able to discover my way of interpreting them and i have understood how these have changed my perspective in the last few sanya jain months. while i have learnt so much from the university, it was not a very straightforward and easy path. a strong take away from week 9 was to “trust yourself” because a person is the best judge of themselves. in life, everyone may come across different obstacles where they feel pressured to act in a certain way or achieve something, but the most important thing to keep in mind is to trust yourself. personally, there have been times when instead of doing what i think i should do, i go with what my family and friends expect. an example would be my college applications. i was expected to apply to the top ivy schools and many of which i didn’t want to go through. in this process i forgot what i really wanted to study and conformed to what my parents and counsellors would expect from me. the only time i made my own choice of what i really want to do was when i got into the universities and had to decide. notre dame was the best choice for me and that is the reason i came here despite any other pressures. through this experience i learnt to trust myself. the same applies for decisions i take at this university. while there are many people to help guide me when i am struggling, an important learning for me was to figure solutions to the problems by myself and trust myself. one problem that i did face was that of expectations. coming here i had very high expectations. being the topper of my school made me think that i had to excel in everything at university too and i thought i would. however, i failed to realise that competing with 40 classmates was very different from a couple of thousand students at university. hence in the first week when i didn’t get chosen for the ey sibc project, i felt dejected and lost. i began questioning if business was something i was capable of pursuing and if that's what i truly wanted to do. that was the moment i began to doubt myself. however, correctly pointed out by julia hogan in her article “expectations are the bars we set”. (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) i think we often get caught up with expectations and feel the pressure to conform to them which prevents us from understanding what we truly want. moreover, as a freshman i think the imposter syndrome is a very common phenomena because coming into a new environment with so many people often makes one question their own https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau sanya jain abilities and casts doubts. therefore, i believe we are in a vulnerable situation where we should not fall prey to this syndrome and simply trust our abilities and instincts. hence, trusting myself and backing myself was an important quality i learnt through my semester at this university. (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it” by elizebeth coxmoreau fye week nine) through the various obstacles, and the various means of support that i received throughout the semester, i have finally discovered the true essence of this university. this university is one that i can call home, for it fosters a community that is so giving and accepting, like no other. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo i believe that i am getting better by continuously putting myself in positions to grow… i have mentioned my gap year before, but i am not sure if i have ever mentioned why i chose to take it. surprisingly, it was not because of covid, although i will admit, it worked out nicely. i made the decision to take a gap year in the library of my high school months before i even heard about the global pandemic. it was out of desperation. for a long time, i did not feel like myself. each year of highschool was a buffer, an opportunity to get better, but as a senior, i did not have another year. college was approaching, and to me, college felt like the official start to my life. i did not want to start my life out on the wrong foot, so i took a gap year; yet another buffer to get better. i spent my time in chicago, and although i did learn a lot, i never got better like i had hoped. this made my decision to take a gap year feel meaningless, like i wasted another year of my life. and it was a slap in the face really. the problem of going to college not feeling like myself persisted, and i could not take another gap year this time. i had to suck it up and go. it was hard at first really hard. there were times i wanted to quit, times i cried, and times i wished it would be better. however, through my first six weeks at college i have experience firsthand that through classes like moreau, that both the university of holy cross and notre dame are setting me up to get better by making me think and grow. the difference between the gap year and college is i am put into more positions to grow, and as a result, i really feel like i am growing. i can confidently say that i learned something about myself in each week of moreau. i learned that i am constantly trying to be vulnerable… dr. brown mentioned that being vulnerable means “in part to let loose, to be the full authentic version of yourself”. previously, i interpreted the “let loose” ((“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) as a metaphor for pouring out your feelings onto a trusted friend and being vulnerable that way. now i see that the terms are connected. i must let loose and be the full authentic version of myself. to me this means just being natural. so many times, i find myself in conversations feeling awkward. worry about what to say next, using visual cues to see how to people indirectly respond to what i say, and this puts pressure on myself to be someone i am not. i must eliminate these feelings by letting loose and being the full authentic version of myself. i also realized the importance of being vulnerable from watching the ted talk for this weeks qqc. it made me think about how for such a long time i was not being vulnerable, and if i wanted to change for the better, i had to start there. so, i did. i tried to be very vulnerable in my response. week one set a standard for honesty and contemplation in my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be responses. this introspective approach i took to answering the qqc’s is the reason that i learned a lot about myself along the way, and i have week one to thank for that. i believe that my weaknesses are conquerable… this week’s qqc was awesome. i was excited to see that it was searching for self-knowledge because that was something i have being doing everyday for the past couple years of my life. i am always thinking throughout the day, concentrating on my feelings, trying to understand them, and this week’s video really helped with that. david brooks mentioned that “atom i is built by building on your strengths. atom ii is built by fighting your weaknesses.” (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two) atom ii is the mindset where you are at piece with yourself, and it was very appealing to me at the time, and still is, because that was the mindset i was and am striving for. the problem i was having in trying to get there is i was too focused on an atom i mindset. what i mean by that, is in trying to get back to my original self i was focusing too much on trying to get back at what i was good at. david brooks showed me that i can never get back to what i was good at because my weaknesses will keep getting in the way. this week’s qqc made me think a lot about my weaknesses. i literally think i watched the video 13 times because it was so interesting to me. somewhere along the line i heard brooks talked about a signature sin, the biggest weakness, and it made me think about mine. i feel like i have a good grasp on it. there is a constant war going on in my head between atom i and atom ii. i am conscious of this war as it is happening, yet i always let atom i win. now that i know to show atom ii some love it had been something i have been trying to implement into my daily life and i believe that is working, and my weaknesses are slowly being conquered. i believe i am slowly starting to understand my faith journey… this was a very useful qqc video for me and it relates a lot to my situation. from the start of my gap year, i was convinced that i was going to be better by the end of it and accomplish my goal. i lied to myself really. i tried to tell myself that one of these days i was going to wake up and at some random point in my day i was going to have some life changing revelation that made my whole life make sense to me. this never happened, and i felt hopeless. but father pete showed me that “instead of despair keep believing the next tug will break loose that insight that’s needed most” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick – moreau fye week three) here, i learned that problems get solved over time and that it my job to have faith they will work itself out. this quote also made me think back to a car ride i shared with my uncle chris in the summer before college. my mom always told me that me and uncle chris were the same. she said we were both thinkers. i had to drive with him, alone to meet grandparents, and the night before the ride i had a feeling that i was going to have the chance to open to him. i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109430 was also desperate in thinking that uncle chris was going to give me some answer that made all my problems make sense. i did end up having the chance to open to him, and like ms. brown would have wanted me too, i let loose and opened to him. i was vulnerable. the conversation was good, and eye opening. he pounded me with questions, and i told him that like i said before i was hoping that one day it would all make sense. but, when i said it out loud to him, i could hear how that made no sense at all, and instead learned and understood that my story will play out over time and faith is going to have a big role in it. i believe that i do not have to be perfect anymore and i need to be imperfect… i realize now that i have 1,316 words and if i continue my current format, i will be well over the limit. i am a perfectionist, and in a perfect world i would finish this out and turn something in that is probably 3,000 words, but i really believe i do not have to be perfect anymore. that puts a lot of pressure on myself, and as i am reflecting on my qqc’s now i realize i put a lot of pressure on myself too. as i mentioned before, when i answered the first qqc thoughtfully and fully, i set a standard to reach that level excellence each week with the next qqc. i took a lot of time on the qqc’s and all schoolwork for that matter. i get this uneasy feeling in my stomach when i do work that is not to the best of my ability, but the problem i am running into right now is that i never feel like i am doing the best work i can do. i have this stuck mindset where i think that if i do the best work possible then i will impress the people that read it and i will somehow feel smarter and better about myself, but that is an atom i mentality right there. always striving for success of getting a good grade, trying to be perfect, and as a result, i am not giving myself the opportunity grow my atom ii mindset by being imperfect. i have imperfections. my signature sin is that i am aware of the struggle in my head throughout my daily life and i always let atom i win. this inflicts bad feelings upon me. it feels like it is the same struggle each day, same feelings, and no improvements sometimes. it feels like the problem is here to say. i experience these feelings the most in my conversations with people throughout the day. before, i was able to connect with everyone, but now i feel like it is hard for me to connect with anyone at all, even my own family sometime. it is weird. “feeling both good and bad about a friend, however, is the first sign of a toxic friendship.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” – olivia t. taylor – moreau week 4) i sense that with the friends i have i indirectly give them bad feeling about our friendship. i feel bad because i think i am being a bad friend, but it is most frustrating because i am not trying to be. i always think i say and do the wrong things, which i guess could be classified as social anxiety. however, i do not like to view it that way. i just like to view it as i am making the wrong decision. picking atom i. to me, picking atom ii is being vulnerable, honest, okay with yourself, and i must have faith that it will work. as i said before, i was able to connect with people well and i had life giving relationships. i wrote about these in the poem from week six. but as i wrote the poem i was scared. since i had this feeling that i am not able to connect with people anymore, i feared i was not capable to https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ make friendships like anymore. i would not have any more more people to look back on fondly and write about one day. are my life-giving friendships over? as i write this integration, i am confident they are not. just recently i have been seeing massive improvements in my mentality, specifically in my ability to connect with people. it is very encouraging. and it is a result of my constant effort to be vulnerable, my true self, so that i can see my weaknesses and work on them. in being vulnerable and focusing on atom ii i have stopped worrying about being perfect and feeling the pressure that comes with this burden. these efforts have been working at untying this big knot i have in my life, and although it is still tied, i have faith that it will be untied soon. i must trust in this process, because “trust and faith are inexplicably tied, and the more that you activate your faith, the stronger it will become, and the more that you will trust in the outcome and his impeccable timing.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” – by father kevin groves – moreau week five) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 keely mcglone father kevin integration 2 3 december 2021 the power of a year’s time almost a year ago, i visited notre dame during the height of the pandemic with my dad. i applied here on a whim because the school is in my family. i knew little about it, but my parents told me to give it chance. i made the 12-hour drive to south bend with my dad to stay in the morris inn. i remember being confused on campus: what building was which, how to get from the bookstore to the dome, and what made notre dame so special. the architecture was beautiful, yet the visit left me with a looming sense of uncertainty. now, i lay my head to rest every night in ryan hall, directly next to the morris inn. i pointed at ryan hall last year and asked my dad, “dad, are those dorms? do people live in that building?” he wasn’t sure, so i never got an answer. today, i sit in my dorm room typing this paper, realizing that so much has changed sense my first encounter with notre dame. i couldn’t imagine the ways in which notre dame would change me then, but now that i know, i am grateful. “what am i made for?’ is a question we are all raised to answer, yet at nineteen years old i am still unsure of the correct response. the truth is, we are made for many things in life and what we are made for in the eyes of each person we connect with may be different. something we are made for leads us to a vocation. this is the reason why what we are made for is up to ourselves, not others. individual passion is necessary, but sometimes others have perspectives we were too narrow-minded to view. i asked one of my best friends the daunting question: “what am i made for?” i already had two concrete answers in my head, but i was curious to see what those closest to me thought. she proceeded to say that i am made to promote social change. the answer surprised me. i thought she would comment on something career oriented because that is such a large part of a college student’s life. yet, the answer was reassuring because i agreed with her. this was before i came to notre dame and i wasn’t sure why i agreed, but i blew it off, assuming one day i would find the answer. since being at notre dame, i’ve found the answer. while my potential for social change has been stagnant from my visit last year until today, it has changed as i grow and as i find myself here. i’ve learned through moreau that i am a relatively socially conscious and aware person who seeks to understand why people act in certain ways. i immerse myself in social situations and want to understand both sides. in week 7, “identifying perspective,” i revealed this aspect of myself. while i was writing it, i wasn’t thinking that my thoughts could be pointing towards what i am made for. i label awareness as foundational. this is most likely because it is a solid part of my foundation as a person that allows me to be immersed in social consciousness, so i know the benefits and want others to be able to experience them. i have since concluded that i am made of perspective. during week 12, we were given the daunting task of writing rules for life. i didn’t know where to begin because i didn’t know how a list of rules for life could be constructed so easily. i decided one of mine would be: “if you must, choose rationality.” father kevin left a comment that confirmed i am made of perspective: “i especially am fond of ‘if you must, choose rationality.’ it reminds me that we have a choice and that we veer from our better instincts (to think it through with perspective) when we don’t value truth or love, but something more expedient.” i had a similar thought in mind when writing my reflection this week. we have a choice to choose perspective; in my case, i chose it. while what i am made for internally is important, it would be irrational to ignore what i am made for in a career as a college student. after all, it is one of the reasons i chose to go to a prestigious academic institution. my internal desires support my academic desires even if they are “separate” areas of life. from an academic standpoint, i believe i am made for helping people, but not in the expected way. it may seem questionable that i claim i am made for a future of helping people because i am an applied and computational mathematics and statistics major. this is not a typical career path acknowledged for helping others like a doctor or an educator, but i know i have the potential to make what i desire of it. my dream with this major is to work with data in ways that help people find truth by creating tangible methods and through proper analysis. in week 10 and 11, i address notre dame’s mission of the pursuit for truth. this search for truth supports students as they change personally and academically. my time thus far as a student at notre dame has given me the best possible model of the search for truth. i have realized that it is not just a want of mine, rather a necessity. i will not be fulfilled unless i complete this idea because it is what i am made for. even if i were to lose interest in my major and the idea of working with data, i wouldn’t be lost because i am grounded in my desire to help people find truth. aspects of what i am made of like my competitiveness and my empathy for others that i have come to appreciate and despise will help me achieve this goal. competitiveness isn’t a bad thing, but it can be taken too far at times. i have learned that this semester at notre dame; not everything needs to be a competition and it is better to be collaborative and supportive of others around us. yet, this competition is what gives me the fuel to go after what i am made for, and it pushes me to work harder. our perception of ourselves compared with the perception of ourselves from others was analyzed in my week 9 qqc. from my reflection, i learned that i want to love others because i prioritize the way others view me over the way i view myself. this empathy is good in social scenarios, but it will also be applicable in what i am made for career-wise. 10/10/21 moreau integration values that transform the soul i believe that i grow through experience. as a naturally introverted and sometimes shy person, it is easy for me to want to stay in my comfort zone. whether that means staying in my same social circle of friends, sticking with the same route to class and back, or observing conversations in class rather than participating in them. it can also be easy to avoid certain situations so that i do not have to worry about things becoming awkward. i am still working on becoming more comfortable outside of my comfort zone and thankfully college has helped with that. being a college student has forced me into many uncomfortable situations, many of which have brought out vulnerability. as brene brown talks about her career in social work she mentions that she was taught to, “lean into the discomfort.”[footnoteref:0] she continues to explain how she did not want to do that and the obstacles and struggles in her way because she was avoiding vulnerability and not accepting it. once she realized the power of vulnerability and how it can lead us to our full potential she was able to grow. [0: (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) ] although in college i will encounter many moments of vulnerability, i think that the best way to put myself out there is through experience. experience will allow me to make mistakes which may be uncomfortable at first, however after those mistakes, i have the opportunity to learn and grow. experience is the fuel source to vulnerability which leads to growth. i believe that equality is an important value that needs to be recognized exponentially more in the world. equality is important to me because i think that everyone should be able to reach their full potential without being hindered by implicit biases or the judgements of others. when chimamanda ngozi adichie explained her life story she said, “when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.”[footnoteref:1] this quote really resonates with me because our society feels like it is becoming increasingly polarized to one side of an argument based on what information people have been exposed to or what they want to believe. the truth is buried, twisted, and manipulated easily and we have to do more digging if we want to understand both sides of the story which can be challenging for some people. the consequences of not having the truth can be dangerous and scary. i think it is important for me and the people i encounter to be conscious of our implicit biases and recognize that everyone should be valued the same even if they are different from us. if we can accept the diversity in our world, we can become a stronger community and work together better. [1: (https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) ] i believe that faith drives who i am and who i want to be. david fagerberg explains that, “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god.”[footnoteref:2] he also states, “we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we only need to look around. he’s there, and the dawning faith sees him everywhere.”[footnoteref:3] fagerberg explains the importance of faith, hope, and love. i am so grateful that these values are all present in my college experience. as a holy cross and notre dame student, i am glad that i have so many opportunities to continue and grow in my faith. after going to a public high school, i recognize how strong a faith filled community can be. my faith has helped me in so many ways since i got to college. i have been able to meet new people that have the same values as me and it has never been hard to find a friend or group of people that i can go to mass with. this type of environment fosters a community where i can find a lot of great friends. olivia taylor states, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.”[footnoteref:4] virtuous friendships can be hard to come by sometimes. i am fortunate to have a tight-knit community of gateway students and also notre dame students. i am excited to learn more about the people that surround me and their goals/values in life so that i can hopefully build strong virtuous relationships throughout college. [2: (https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by david fagerberg-moreau fye week 3) ] [3: (https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by david fagerberg-moreau fye week 3) ] [4: ( https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ by olivia taylor-moreau fye week 4)] i believe that i am made to love and help others. i really enjoyed writing my “what has formed me” poem because it brought up memories of the past and reminded me of how i want to see myself in the future. george ella lyon describes it as, “its life beyond my notebook is a testimony to the power of poetry, of roots, and of teachers.”[footnoteref:5] the meaning of these poems is so powerful. it ties in well with david brook’s points about how you live your life. he states, “you go into yourself, you find the sin that you have created over and again through your life...you fight that sin and you wrestle that sin. and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed.”[footnoteref:6] i do not want to go through my education and life experiences to build my resume. i want to be present in the moment and grow into the person i want to be rather than what i want to be portrayed as on paper based on accomplishments. at notre dame and holy cross, i want to strive to reach my goals academically, socially, mentally, and physically. as my career, i hope to do research in healthcare to advance medicine and help others. i know that notre dame and holy cross will prepare me to reach that goal and go beyond to further my faith and growth in this community as well. as father sorin wrote, “sometimes when i think about the good that can be done throughout this country had we a college conducted according to catholic principles, my desire to erect such a building torments me and disturbs my rest…”[footnoteref:7] i am so grateful that father sorin decided to create notre dame and i am so grateful for the strong tradition in faith that has continued for many years. i am confident that i will grow and reach my goals during my time here in college and for the years to come after. [5: (http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html by george ella lyonmoreau week 6)] [6: (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim by david brook-moreau week 2)] [7: (sorin letter to moreau.pdf google drive by father sorin-moreau week 5)] 08/25/2021 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? · the objective regarding “defining beliefs and values” stands out to me because i believe as a young adult in an influential world, it is important to stay grounded in your morals. especially in college, it is easy to be overwhelmed by the abundant opportunities and distractions. therefore, i want to figure out my priorities and what morals i want to live by so that i stay true to myself. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. · question: how can we teach people to believe they are worthy of love and belonging? does that come from positive reinforcement or life experience? · quote: “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.” (the power of vulnerability, brené brown). this quote stands out to me because it seems very relevant to the first few weeks of a first-year college student’s life. everyone is trying to make good first impressions and build friendships. however, in an attempt to please everyone, we can be too cautious of what we are saying and avoid “being seen” for a fear that people may not like us for who we are. the result of a lack of vulnerability is a lack of genuine connection, which is ultimately what we look for when building relationships. therefore, it is important to be vulnerable and share our identities with others regardless of how we think they will perceive us. even if we lose a lot of connections from doing this, the genuine ones that we make will be worth it. · comment: i am from portland, oregon which is very different from south bend, indiana in many ways such as culture, diversity, weather, and more. furthermore, there aren’t many students from portland that come to notre dame which pushes me out of my comfort zone to meet new people from different cities and backgrounds. the theme of this speech applies to me because in order to make genuine connections with people that are different from me, i need to allow myself to be vulnerable. i interpret this as making an effort to vocalize my experiences, culture, hardships and more to find things to connect about with other students. integration 2 integration two moreau first year experience december 3, 2021 conquering freshman year: community at notre dame this semester has taught me the importance of the people around me and communities i create. much of what contributed to the exciting and fun semester i had we’re the friends i was able to make and lean on when school or college transitions became stressful. the first semester of college is known for being hard given all the changes freshman must navigate. before coming to notre dame, i was fearful about juggling these changes, but within days, i discovered how supportive and balanced the community is. this helped me quickly find friends and upperclassmen mentors. when school became busier, responsibilities and extracurricular activities began, it was easy to get overwhelmed or feel behind on involvement around campus. my new friends and community helped comfort me, and our ability to create relationships early in the semester made it easier for us to be vulnerable about our stresses. this was very contrary to the experience with imposter system that elizabeth cox describes, “we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we are alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” moreau fye week 9). instead, i had a really eye opening conversation with my roommate and our friend about. we all talked about our stresses with making friends and trying to juggle each person’s feelings and find our avenue for success outside the classroom. we reflected on the added level of worry that silence had given. we felt like everyone else was balancing friends well and didn’t have the same fears for being not enough of a friend for different people, but the conversation showed how incorrect our personal doubt was. i was able to recognize that i need grace with all of the life changes college will bring. this has made me much happier, fulfilled and given me a new freedom that i appreciate. this was a great reminder for me especially since notre dame and college were and are still new. i was even able to lean on this conversation in the weeks following if stress and comparison brought me down. after this experience, i saw the importance of open, diverse discussion. i appreciated the connection between building community and practicing conversation that finds common ground to create vulnerability and comforting connection. i thought about ways i could make a more welcoming environment for people to feel comfortable discussing their beliefs and experiences in order to improve. i found the connection between polarization and dicrimination in community from american magazine’s interpretation of imago dei eye opening. as the american magazine notes, “our schools [must] clearly embody dignity, belonging and justice for marginalized groups[, and] help our students transcend superficial differences and racial constructs by emphasizing our common humanity” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron s.j.moreau fye week 10). this nuanced connection is really important to improving the community and involving all students in notre dame because polarization and discrimination feed on eachother and attempting to solve each problem can agreevate the other. the article focused on the need to bring the two parts of this quote https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 together. i aim to make that my goal over my four years at notre dame. i hope to use this early understanding as my foundation. inspired by my own experience navigating freshman year, i will take what i have learned about community and belonging in moreau to better invite members of notre dame into the community. college provides the unique opportunity to put many people from different backgrounds and beliefs together for a conversation. taking small steps now to make people comfortable sharing will help open more dialogue and teach important lessons for cultivating new relationships and growing community even after graduation. another experience at notre dame that struck me was the ability of professors, students and other community members to remember unique details about me and individualize me as a reminder i was important to them. in moreau fye week 11 another woman reflected on this phenomenon saying, “i have been to europe a lot, and they pretty much know every country. they don’t mistake you; they don’t mix you up” (“with voices true snapshot summary 2020” by the klau center). i found this quote to be a powerful reminder of the differences between my notre dame experience and others. not all people have felt as accepted, welcomed and remembered as i have. americans have become complacent in understanding other cultures, which negatively impacts our ability to build community with an international student body. this has also been a repeated theme in my comparative politics class as my professor has encouraged my classmates and i to break beyond selfish assumptions. i appreciated that this woman shared her own direct experience because it provided better insight into the ways i could live out a well-informed world view. i plan to take my experience and better live that out for all members. i can do my own research and ask my own compassionate questions. i will focus on seeing individuals and making unique conversations before assuming where they are from to create a community focused on individuals and embracing experiences not forcing conformity. after learning about the goals of holy cross education, the intentionality of my first-year experiences at notre dame and love within the community has not come as a surprise. i discovered the optimistic perspectives of holy cross education that work to connect us with god through a human perspective. moreau was able to follow the teaching of “striving for completeness [by] spending [his] life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre damemoreau fye week 12). i appreciated the way moreau thoughtfully lived his life to create the congregation of holy cross and care for students. he followed god’s love and values of family by paralleling the structure of the holy cross with the holy family. this also permeated into holy cross education in an effort to create family and emphasize the importance of community in the congregation for the rest of its time. i hope to learn to emulate this same love in my time at notre dame. to me, moreau’s commitment to spreading the catholic faith when it was waning and under fire is an example of god working through humans to show himself in times of struggle. moreau set god’s example for how to act and love others. he had clear and ambitious goals to make the world better and worked hard to fulfill his goals by any means possibleeven through long boat rides across the atlantic. moreau showed me the inspiration to set goals that, while lofty, are rooted in community and god. in conclusion, my first semester of freshman year was defined by a community and welcome unlike any other because of notre dame’s values and history. now, it is my turn to do the same for others as my classmates continue to find their place on campus and over the next three years https://voicestrue.nd.edu/snapshot-summaries/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ as freshmen arrive. i must take my own experience and new knowledge of the struggles others face to act as a force for good. not everyone is afforded the same opportunities to enter the notre dame community, but my privilege to enter it gives me the important role of helping improve shortcomings to make a community that is open to all. i can also take these skills beyond notre dame into my life at home and after graduation. integration 2 laura diaz moreau integration #2 friday, november 3 2021 a new beginning a year ago from today, as i anxiously waited for notre dame’s admission decision, i never imagined myself as the person i am nowadays. now, as the end of my first semester approaches, i am thankful for the opportunity to be part of the notre dame community, and i am proud to say that coming here has been one of the best decisions i have ever made. throughout my journey in notre dame, i have encountered several challenges, experiences and lessons i would not have found in any other place. when i got to notre dame, what i first encountered was the feeling of “imposter syndrome”, especially during my first classes. i started to feel very overwhelmed and felt like i did not belong here. however, as weeks went by i started to feel more confident about myself because i realized that i should not push myself too hard and that i should live to please myself, and not to reach other’s standards. as julia hogan says, “. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to.” ( "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit", by julia hogan, grotto moreau fye week nine). it is very normal for a person to create high standards for themselves just because they want to make everyone around them proud, instead of actually doing what they really desire. every person should live only for themselves, doing what makes them happy and not by doing what society expects them to do. we should live for our own standards and the only person we should please is ourselves, at the end it is our life and we are the ones who should control it. as weeks passed, i encountered a community that challenged me to open up my mind in many aspects.i might share some similarities with some students here at notre dame, but differences composed the bigger part all the time when meeting new students. despite my differences with most of the other college students, there is something about the notre dame community that makes you always feel at home. as one of the texts of this week says, “each human person is created in the likeness and image of god and is therefore deserving of dignity and respect”. being part of a community is understanding that you are surrounded by different people with different backgrounds and it’s important to accept everyone just the way they are, specially here in notre dame, where we can find a very diverse community. as said in the video of "women find healing through kintsugi workshop", “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-find-your-calling/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” ( "women find healing through kintsugi workshop" , grotto moreau fye week ten). i feel it is very important to learn how to make the best of our experiences, it does not matter if they are good or bad, and this is what the video shows. in the end, what shapes a person and makes them who they are today are their past experiences, and people should always keep in mind that there is no bad experience that will not make you a stronger person in the end. at notre dame, i have also encountered a diverse, special community of people. as prof. agustin fuentes says, “if we are really serious, about trying to make this world a better place, then diversity matters for all of us.” ( "diversity matters” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). society tends to be very biased regarding race and in his talk, prof. agustin explains why diversity matters for all of us. what i liked about his talk is that he emphasizes that living in a diverse community is important because we should learn to live around other people who are not the same as us, and we should learn to understand that everyone is different, and we should respect that. in other words, in order to stop being biased we should surround ourselves with diverse communities that will teach us to see and treat everyone the same even though we are different. one of my favorite things here in notre dame is that students are allowed to have a strong sense of community, and not just any community. what i have learned here is that the notre dame community is one filled with diversity and that will be with me and support me throughout my entire life. as the end of the semester approaches, i have encountered many challenges in which i have found myself relying on hope and faith. as written by fr. james b. king in “hope holy cross and christian education”, “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift. (8:118)” (“hope holy cross and christian education”, pages 14 16 by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau week twelve). what leads me to move on and stay strong during difficult situations is this belief that god is looking out for me and that he has a plan for me. this belief and the ability to hold on to hope is what bring a person to live in peace and with confidence that everything gets better at the end. as this quote says, god has nothing but gifts to offer and we must remain hopeful that he will guide us through the best path for each one of us.i believe in god’s plan for me and that i am right where i need to be right now, even if i don’t feel like this all the time. even https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ though i have encountered many obstacles, i am hopeful that it is all for a reason and that they will only make me stronger and a better person. after all, i dare to say that even though i have encountered difficult situations here in notre dame, i have also encountered situations that have shaped me into a better and stronger person. notre dame has challenged me in so many ways and i am grateful for this. i am sure that i will continue to face each challenge with determination and hope. i could not have chosen a better place to spend the next four years and i am proud to be able to call notre dame my new home, a home that has given me the opportunity of a new beginning. final integration mission statement patrick mckenzie final moreau integration mission statement 4/29/22 mckenzie’s manual for life i strive to be a good man. i seek to embody humility and grace. i do not seek to impress my peers, but to find my inner peace. i seek to be courteous and respectful to all. i hold myself accountable for my actions, and admit wholeheartedly when i am in the wrong. i learned to center myself against the relentless storm of life. i seek stability, consistently, but not control. stability gives me peace of mind. stability gives me a routine. i am disciplined in my actions and demonstrate personal awareness. i am deliberate and decisive in my judgment. i am stubborn because i hold myself to high standards and values. i choose to be kind over being right. i strive to lighten the load on others. i hold myself to the highest standard of integrity. i act with courage when action must be taken. i understand there is a moral obligation for all of us to do good. i act the way i do because it is the right thing to do. i strive to set an example for those who are experiencing internal conflict. i strive to be a lighthouse to direct and accompany those on their journey. i act to show how burdenless life can be by letting go of expectations, impressing people, and being who you are. the burden of acting for others will lead to emotional burnout and fatigue. by letting go of the weights that too often constrain people from goodness, one will discover the genuine feeling of serving others. i do not set out to change people, but rather to help them see the light their life can bring to others. i bring humanity and sincerity to all of my interactions. i value people for who they are and the joy they bring to my life. there are times, especially this first year of college when my values have been strained and challenged. there are times when i refer back to my inner peace to understand who i want to be and where i want to go. i make decisions based on how they will affect me in the long run. i seek wisdom to discern my future. it is a promise not only to myself, but to others that i have never, and never will violate the values and standards i set forth for myself. taylor kelly moreau fye 3 december 2021 encountering what i have encountered throughout my life, i have learned that i must enter into new experiences with an open mind and be willing to adapt. in a world that is ever changing, we must understand the importance of opening ourselves up and asking questions. this semester has taught me that it is okay to ask questions and change. i now understand that i do not need others' validation to succeed and it is up to me how i respond to things i have encountered. as human beings, we are constantly changing. knowing yourself is an ongoing process. the misconceptions we have of ourselves affect the way we live. notre dame and this course has changed my perspective on life and highlighted what it means to be a person. many things have grown in importance: life-long relationships, hope, love, faith. and many things i used to hold high in my life have seemed unimportant. therefore, i have encountered personal development and i will respond by being the best person for myself for now and for the future. i went to catholic school all my life except for three years. during these years i attended the public school in my area. since it was such a big class i felt like i could not stand out and be myself. i did everything in my power to be like everyone else. i stayed very quiet in class, i stopped playing sports, wore what everyone else was wearing, and lost touch with god. i sadly believed that being in touch with my faith would make people who never seemed to be religious not want to be friends with me. i had so much trouble making friends and i never understood why. looking back now it was probably because i was not myself. when i started to depend on validation from others i was not true to myself and this is honestly because i did not know who i was. during this time in public school i thought i had to be very “girl like” and fit into the same mold as everyone. all of this now seems so silly to me. why did i care so much about what others thought? my journey at notre dame (just within the past three months) helped me understand how little others' opinions of me matter. week 9 showed me that i cannot “. . . look to others for approval or for directions for how to live . . .” my life ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hoganmoreau week 9). it is not a bad thing to have goals but it becomes toxic when we rely on others’ validation from these expectations.we must start doing things for ourselves in order to get the most out of life. however, i must understand that everyone faces these realities, thus we need to not continue to be so hard on ourselves or others. in the end this mentality will create relationships that matter. everyone should feel welcome in any community they believe they are meant to be a part of. for me that is notre dame. which is why embracing diversity matters ("diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentesmoreau week 11). i believe to strengthen my bonds with my community i need to create a space that welcomes everyone. because, in the long run, everyone involved can learn something. we learn the most from those who are different then us and communities filled with people with different experiences can actually be the strongest kinds. i am not less capable than the people around me and i am worthy of the things i have accomplished. in my sophomore year of high school i was diagnosed with depression and anxiety ultimately taking a major toll on my life. it was a never ending cycle. i was sad because of my life but then i was sad because i was sad. i often found myself isolating from others, wishing to be one of the popular girls, and posting mean things about others who hurt me. when i took the time to step back and look at the person i had become, i realized that it was okay to not be okay. when we recognize that we must heal and create positives out of failure, we live our best lives. the stories told by all the women in the week 10 video helped me understand this fact. it is okay to struggle and be broken (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” from grottomoreau week 10). however, it is our willingness to change that makes us strong. since being diagnosed i have spent time in therapy and re-evaluated the person i wanted to be. this reminded me of what palmer said in week 11 about “inner-work” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmermoreau week 11). receptivity allows us to have a more in-depth view of reality, adjust our perspective, and perceive the big picture. being receptive allows us to take a break from the battle of trying to force anything to happen, and it allows us to get some positive energy and understanding. my journey at notre dame thus far has shown me the importance of encountering brokenness and responding in a way that builds strength and community. this school provides each of us with an opportunity to get to know ourselves better. i can only know that much of myself which i have had the courage to share with you and i am getting to know myself better. god let me be here now for this purpose, and it is through hope and love that i live faithfully. hope and faith is something we can carry throughout our lives. as our faith teaches us, one does not have to be perfect in order to live a good life. exam results or gpas do not determine a person's capacity for lifelong discipleship, no matter how well formed he or she may be. life is a working process and it is that that makes us strong. i know that i must be willing to take risks and hope for the best. as the screwtape letter pointed out, it is in our tough times that we are formed into the person god wants us to be (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewismoreau week 12). god will always love us, therefore, it is in our hands to be hopeful. we just need to have hope in god’s plan. “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkinsmoreau week 10). this quote reiterates my new found importance for love and believing in god. since i have been at school, i have made it my goal to go to mass once a week. so, on sunday mornings i head to the basilica with my friend julie. from this i have not only engaged in my faith, but have seen the importance of letting go and doing so with love. we must let go, and let god. if i want to continue to live this faithful life i am building i need to have hope: hope in myself, hope in others, and hope in god. in conclusion, everyday is a new day. ​​i have encountered personal development this semester and will bring it into the following semesters. i now know how to respond to life's hardships and have been inspired to become the best person for myself for now and for the future. i will make it my mission to do more things for me and create a safe space for everyone. i will also make room for god and trust the process (go sixers). all i have to do is be open with myself and perhaps i will see for the first time in a long while how good i really am. integration 2 tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 24 november 2021 my journey at notre dame thus far i have now completed almost a whole semester of my college career, and this new, ongoing chapter of my story of life has introduced me to many challenges and unique experiences. characters have entered my life, mainly in the form of new friends, but foes have also joined the plot, namely in the form of failures, setbacks, and my own insecurities. these factors seem like they would weigh me down and hinder me from succeeding in school and life, but i have grown to deal with these adversaries in effective, proactive ways. the moreau class has taught me various strategies to understand my values and enhance my personal development process against adversity. “two roads diverged in a yellow wood” is a quote from “the road not taken” by robert frost that echoed throughout my pre-secondary education and represents my struggle to decide to depart from my home and all my family and friends that live there for the university of notre dame. i got a full-ride and had to attend notre dame, but leaving my friends behind pained my heart; i could only look forward with optimism to find my future besties in college, specifically, my future bridesmaid. oh how i was mistaken. as emery bergmann from the new york times conveys, “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by tran 2 emery bergmann, ny times moreau fye week nine). this paralleled my life accurately, as i anticipated finding close friends instantly upon entering college, just like the movies portray, but reality is not like that. i have made a few friends up to this point in the semester, but cultivating these relationships with them took weeks, and my closest friends come from my dorm after everyday interactions. i have found that college is filled with short encounters with small talk instead of long, meaningful conversations, and it takes two to form a real bond, reciprocating the same energy with each other. moving past my dilemma with the college expectations of being a social butterfly with close friends, i realized that i needed to work on self-love as well. even before i stepped foot on campus, i have struggled with appreciating and loving myself, which most likely stemmed from not only my parents’ desire for a successful american daughter, but my own unrealistic expectations of perfection, whether that be in grades, looks, or personality. however, the grotto kintsugi video featuring kirsten where she shares, “they [kintsugi participants] learn that the things they’ve experiencedthe good, the bad, the ugly, all of thatit has made them this beautiful dynamic, interesting person that they are today” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto ft. kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). i feel comforted by this quote because i had a series of hard experiences the few months before i went to notre dame, and they had a grave impact on my self-image, breaking my confidence. going to notre dame and being around smart and accomplished fellow students did not improve my self-impression, and it just felt like i was a broken bowl while everyone else was fine china. the video showed me that this view is wrong; instead of depreciating myself for past mistakes, i tran 3 should honor what these mishaps have made me. i need to recognize the flaws that make me different from others and lovable to myself, as self-love is the best love. upon building my own self-confidence and love, i will be able to serve as a benefactor for my community. in the past, i attended monthly leadership conferences, and i led many clubs at my high schools, but the college community is much different and more separated. one tip from palmer’s “thirteen ways of looking at community” stood out to me, which was “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week eleven). this portrays the need for different people in a community. blind followers cannot fully encompass a community; critical members must also be present in order to keep the community in check and contribute new ideas for the better of the group. for instance, when i participated in asian allure, an annual performance festival that showcases the different asian cultures of notre dame, the organizer of the event was determining how the performers would give their final bows, and she wanted each performance group to leave the stage after taking their bow, but some performers were involved in multiple groups. therefore, other members of the event organizing committee criticized the leader’s decisions, and a more effective organization of bows was set in motion. i first-hand saw the necessity for different voices in the community to be appreciated in order for the community to succeed. no matter how often i think that my present condition, whether good or bad, will last forever, i must realize that i am subject to change. lewis conveys this in his satirical words from “the screwtape letters,” “this means that while their spirit can be directed to an external object, tran 4 their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change'' (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this well-rounds my viewpoint of the world, as i realize how i will inevitably experience change. my understanding of change will provide me a reservoir of hope; there is a future no matter what stage of life i am in. this hope can be for anything and everything, whether it is hope to accomplish a career goal or something as broad as hope for a good life. i really need this hope in my conscious to keep going when times are rough, like when i failed my first bio module quiz in what i thought was the one class i understood, or when i felt socially isolated in my sociology class when we were supposed to get fake married and no one would be my pretend spouse. these were low points in my time in college, no matter how miniscule they seem to others, but i understand that these experiences are just modes of change i am going through as i step forward through time. these changes make me who i am in the present, and i will accept them as gifts to have a brighter viewpoint on life. now, i would personally identify myself as an ambitious college student trying to survive all her classes. i do not feel as smart as everyone else, nor do i have the clearest idea of my future career goals, but i do know that i am an amazing person. like all people, i have my pitfalls and troughs in life, but there’s light in every darkness, and that makes life so much more interesting to live. i am bound to change as i experience many different events in my journey, and i only look forward to the person i will be in the future while focusing my everything on the present, which is what matters. word count [1334] encountering, envisioning, and enacting new experiences as i enter into these final weeks of my first semester in college, i reflect on the many things i’ve encountered: a new environment, new friends, new professors, new classes, new responsibilities living on my own, and so much more. for the most part, each of these encounters have been exciting new experiences and opportunities to grow as an individual, on the other hand, some encounters have tested my confidence and my beliefs that i am able to handle things on my own. yet what has defined my ability to live on my own and act as an adult is how i’ve responded to each of these encounters. throughout my journey this semester, i’ve asked many questions whether that be anything from the basics of college life, to asking deeper questions such as whether i am fit for notre dame. during week 9 of moreau, we watched a video that discussed “imposter syndrome,” a phenomenon where one does not think they are fit to belong whether that be at a university, in the workplace, or elsewhere, nor do they believe they are worthy of their accomplishments. (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). going into midterms week right before thanksgiving break, my stress level was high. i was worried i wasn’t going to get all of my assignments in on time nor was i going to do well on all my exams. i kept having the thoughts that everyone around me was doing so well and just kept asking myself why i couldn’t keep up. after opening up to my friends, i came to learn that i wasn’t the only one feeling this way. as much as everyone may have tried to keep themselves composed, everyone had a bit of stress or worry for the exams ahead. this feeling of “imposter syndrome” went away once i realized that just like all other students at notre dame, we all worked hard to come here and are deserving of our accomplishments. i’ve found that when i have doubts or questions it helps to talk them out whether that be with friends, mentors, or anyone i trust. i will use this method of responding to questions in the future in order to give me comfort in knowing that i am supported by the people around me. when i imagined being in college, i had a slightly different idea of what would truly have importance to me, but now after being at nd, some things have grown in importance as a result of my nd journey while others have shrunk in importance. during week 10 of moreau, we discovered that “love is the deepest human need. each human being has a deep spiritual, psychological, emotional longing for love. and not to get it injures us deeply.” (wesley theological seminary commencement by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). in stating this i believe rev. jenkins intended to encourage others to spread love, and in doing so know that love is felt/received in many different ways. before coming to nd i would have interpreted this quote differently. i had imagined that my social life would hold a lot of importance, it would be the place where i “felt and received” love: i should be going to every football game, i should be having fun on the weekends, i should be making lots of friends, i should want to be social. towards the end of the week leading up to the weekend before thanksgiving break, i came down with the flu. i was super congested, had an awful cough and had a high fever. i didn’t want to leave my bed nor did i want to get anyone else sick, so for me, that meant missing the last football game. i felt disappointed and that i was going to miss so much just because i was sick for one game. what i came to realize was that missing out on things isn’t a bad thing and doesn’t mean i’m not loved. while i was sick, my friends came to visit me everyday and bring me tea. with friends like them who genuinely care about me i now know that we spread and receive love through kind acts for one another. with this i’ve also realized that my faith is important to me. i genuinely love going to my dorm mass every sunday night and praying for the week ahead. my scope of what is truly important to me has been changed by my journey at nd. along with questions and things changing their importance to me, some things that seemed “black and white” are now more ambiguous. during week 11 of moreau we discussed how “people don’t consciously realize how racialialized and racist our society is, but change is more possible when we hear different voices” (diversity matters by prof. augustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). my writing and rhetoric class surrounds the topics of environmental and racial justice and oftentimes talk of implicit biases comes up. for one assignment we were asked to look at different advertisements promoting vaccines as well as advertisements about adoption. in analyzing each of these advertisements, which at first glance seem perfectly normal, i came to truly see that some were exclusive and did not do a good job of promoting inclusivity amongst all people. for example, the advertisement promoting getting the flu vaccine featured a white middle class family; it failed to include people of all ages (considering older people may be even more recommended to receive the vaccine) of different socioeconomic backgrounds, and minorities. it seemed to merely use a “poster child” type family to say what everyone should be doing rather than being realistic about who “everyone” is. i believe that in creating and looking at these advertisements people do not have mal intentions, but rather have a lack of knowledge about perspective and their own implicit biases. in order to mitigate any times where our biases may be present, we need to educate ourselves by listening to different people/perspectives and understanding their thoughts. this is why i chose to go to a school like notre dame, i feel as though all students try to be inclusive, engage with diversity, and listen to others. nd recognizes that these biases exist and is trying to educate their students so they will be able to recognize it and see how it may affect others. with some ambiguity comes clarity, and something that has become more clear to me is the journey and experience i hope to have at notre dame. during week 12 of moreau we learned that “competence can be acquired externally in many different ways, but courage is instilled over time by cultivating one’s heart and constantly directing its purposes beyond one’s self” (holy cross and christian education by university of notre dame moreau fye week 12). “courage” specifically is a crucial attribute that all should learn and build in order to better understand how to care for and be conscious of those around you. it took courage to sign up for clubs, to try out for a team, to show up to meetings, and meet with my professors. with support from those around me i see that my courage has strengthened, i’m no longer scared to try and fail but rather see that failing is just another opportunity to try again. i’ve realized that i want to get the most out of my nd experience by participating in as many school-wide events as possible, being involved and with courage trying new things. for the future and my next four years, i will respond to new opportunities by taking the courage to pursue them. within this first semester in college i feel as though i have encountered a multitude of things, but with each of those encounters i have grown and am coming closer and closer to discovering my true self. 8/26 assignment: 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? in the fall semester, the objective to deepen self knowledge is relevant to my life. in the past year, i started to dread going to college, and even started to doubt if i wanted to go at all. i was always so envious of the people that knew themselves and knew what they wanted to study; i was totally lost, and i still am. i’m hoping that moreau will help me understand my own values and beliefs more, so i can apply those into my daily life. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question(s): is it possible to teach vulnerability as a sense of empowerment rather than shame? is it natural for humans to feel shame from vulnerability? is it due to our environment? quote: “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen--really seen.” i love this quote for two reasons. the first is that this quote shows that vulnerability is not forced upon us; rather, it is a choice that we make: “we have to allow ourselves [...].” this might scare some people that they have to willingly be vulnerable. in my mind, though, it is empowering. i have complete control over my own vulnerability and insecurities. i can choose how much to share and how much to keep to myself, but learning how to force yourself out of your comfort zone (rather than being forced from an outside source) is such an important skill to me. the second reason i love this quote is the two words that dr. brown added to the end: “really seen.” these two words imply that there are different ways to be seen: on a surface level and on a deeper level. rejecting vulnerability creates these surface level relationships in which one may technically be “seen,” but lacks the ability for someone to truly see us as who we are. in order to be “really seen,” we must allow ourselves to be vulnerable. commentary: i thoroughly enjoyed this ted talk mainly because i have had to be vulnerable most of my life. one concept that dr. brown mentioned that really stuck with me was that vulnerability is not a good or bad thing; it's just necessary. luckily, i have been exposed to this early. i've gone to a psychologist since i was 9 years old. i’ve learned how to be vulnerable and i'm proud to say that it now comes naturally to me. similarly to dr. brown, i now see it as a necessity in my life, a necessity in order to make connections with people. no true friendship only exists on a surface level; a deep connection requires vulnerability from both parties, which builds love, trust, and acceptance. living in scottsdale, arizona, my struggle in building relationships was not due to my lack of vulnerability, but the lack from the other side. it’s hard to build relationships when it seems like you’re the only one willing to be vulnerable, so i cannot stress enough how important i think it is to teach others to be comfortable in their vulnerability. moreau integration one assignment moreau first year experience i believe that i’m responsible for becoming my best self. in order to change as a person i have to take proactive steps, including being vulnerable with myself and others. vulnerability is an incredibly important strength to have because it allows me to empathize with others and be more honest with myself. vulnerability helps differentiate people, because “they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). it’s pointless to judge others for traits that make all of us human. this includes our own negative introspection, likely caused by the fear and shame we’ve experienced from others. a lot of people feel scared to come out of their shell and truly be themselves, especially now during a time when everybody seemingly looks like they have their life together through the lens of social media. when i was younger and first introduced to social media, i was afraid to talk to new people because i thought they wouldn’t like me as a person and that they’d immediately judge me based only on things they’ve heard about me. however, as i’ve grown older i’ve realized that it’s okay for me to be myself around new people, because if they don’t like me it’s okay! i don’t have to be friends with every individual i meet, i should just be honest with them from the start and see how our relationship changes. if they don’t like me then it simply wasn’t meant to be, and i wouldn’t want to be friends with someone who doesn’t like me for who i am. this way i’m not living for others, i can live for myself, because “you have to surrender to something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i naturally want to please other people to relieve any possible tension, but that wouldn’t reflect who i really am as a person if i’m changing for other people’s benefit. the best thing you can do is stand up for yourself, and hope people respect you for your resolve. i believe that my community should practice introspection more. as a society, we need to become increasingly more aware of our mistakes in order to move forward. i need to start with examining my own mistakes and toxic behaviors, because it would be hypocritical to bark orders at others without following them myself. the best place to start would be with my personal relationships, because “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). i’ve found myself in many situations where i was stuck in a toxic friendship with what seemed like no way out. these negative relationships leave no room for personal growth, and i often found myself spending my personal time worrying about all of the wrong things. if you’re close, you’re likely more honest with each other, and all i want is for someone to help me grow as a human being to be my best self. with honesty, we’re able to show our more unattractive behaviors and learn more about each other. once i took the time to realize my situation, i got out of there as fast as possible, and i’ve been so much happier since then! the most limiting factor with changing our relationships with people is our fear of being uncomfortable. we need to outgrow this irrational distress surrounding our inability to change. it seems that “it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias” by keith payne et. al moreau fye week 7). i do sometimes find it hard to admit that i’m wrong, it’s just a part of my human nature. it’s important to get past that initial embarrassment in order to correct myself, because i don’t want to hurt others in the process of my ignorance. it’s better to fix your mistakes and become a better person than harm other individuals. i believe that i grow by correcting my mistakes and learning from them. this is relevant both inside and outside of the classroom, because i’m constantly making mistakes in my day to day life. i used to be incredibly scared of doing the wrong thing, because i thought it meant that i was a flawed individual who didn’t deserve a second chance. anything less than an a meant i was unintelligent, and any conflict with friends meant i was a bad person. after spending a lot of time collecting my fair share of mistakes and other bad experiences, i realized that it wasn’t the mistake itself that had an impact on my life, but the way i used it to learn. you must “pay attention to things as they happen to you, for when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). it’s clearly more helpful to take preventative measures first, but if that’s impossible, then paying attention to your wrongdoings is crucial. learning from personal error shows maturity and strength, much more than what is seen in individuals who don’t make mistakes, who therefore can’t learn from them. i believe that tough situations are vital for human development, because they can almost always be used as an important life lesson. we’ve been taught from such a young age that we shouldn’t have flaws because it was assumed that they make us failures. once you get past the emotional turmoil of what seems like a failure, you feel slightly grateful for everything you’ve learned and how much you’ve grown. caponigro_integration ii 1 moreau fye integration ii confidence; capability; belonging; bravery: a change in self-perception my brain works through images: through pictures, through thinking through ideas visually. i take a lot of pictures, and for a long time, i took a short video each day. this ritual of photo taking helps me to remember the memories i’ve shared, the emotions i’ve felt, the relationships that have grown or diminished, the people and places i have encountered thus far, and helps me to reflect on who i am. over this past thanksgiving break, i took the time to put together collages of memories from the past semester, from frisbee, to boxing, to game days, to just being utterly myself. in doing so, i reflected on the semester, my experiences throughout the journey that has been these past few months, and realized how much my perception of notre dame has changed, and also how differently i now see myself as an academic, as a friend, as a creative soul, and as a light. coming into notre dame, my image of the university was one of serious academic rigor, that both the students and faculty were some smart people, and that greatly excited me. i was ecstatic to come to a place where people wanted to learn, and were studious people. my understanding of notre dame was also that there were, to put it bluntly, a lot of white people. not just students, but faculty and staff as well. while notre dame seems much more diverse in its commercials and advertising, the university is undeniably filled with a majority white population. while that understanding has felt as though it holds true, what has shifted is my image of the diversity at notre dame. diversity comes in all shapes and sizes, and attending events like show some skin, like the midnight glee club concert outside of the dome, 2 impromptu adventures with unexpected companions revealed the beauty in the interactions that we discussed in week 11. just like the diversity matters tedtalk discussed, “seeing people around you who are not just like you gives you a context. it allows you to interact with a diverse array of people. diversity in the community lets you see different lifestyles, different ways of being, bringing in different backgrounds to communicate, to experience, to share. in scholarship, different voices, different ideas, different experiences show us different ways of looking at data, different ways of interpreting that world around us. and finally, if we're really serious about trying to make the world a better place, then diversity matters for all of us” (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). in order to create a better world together, we must celebrate the diversity that we encounter on notre dame’s campus, whether that is in a classroom with the students next to us, the teammates we throw to, those living right next door to us, within each community found at notre dame, because as we discussed in our week 6 conversations, we each come from such unique backgrounds with beautiful stories to share, as we discussed in our class conversations in week 10, from such distinct communities that have shaped us into the wonderful humans that we are, here, together, celebrating our brokenness and our rebuilding, putting our hearts back together (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” from grotto moreau fye week 10). thus, my picture of notre dame transformed from one of inauthenticity and “fakeness” to one of celebration and vulnerability, alongside hard, important conversations of how to celebrate one another in our differences, and how to work to create an inclusive community together. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105096 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgjljeqd8gg 3 when talking about our life-giving relationships in the in-class discussions of moreau fye week 4 with gracie during our virtual walk around campus encountering sacred spaces at notre dame, i recalled a very clear memory of a sacred space for myself at the university of the grotto. it must have been in february or early march of 2020, during notre dame’s spring break, when i decided to go for a run up to campus to visit the grotto because my dad’s college roommate’s dad was put into hospice, and i wanted to pray for this family that was so close to my heart. when i stopped my watch and took out my earbuds to walk up the grotto, a ritual i have come to know so well at my time thus far as a now-student of notre dame, i walked up to find i was not alone at the grotto. that is one phenomenon that i absolutely love about going to the grotto, is that i am never, ever alone there. i had started to walk into the gated area when i was stopped by a student who came to ask me “how to do it.” he said that he was a student from china who could not go home because of the then seemingly far-away virus, and he wanted to pray for his family and friends back home. together we walked into the space, we touched the grotto stone, we lit candles, and we knelt together and prayed. we then parted our ways, him back to whatever dorm he was then residing in, me to run back home. growing up coming to the grotto, this experience humbled me. this image, this memory, i’ve only shared with a few others, and i realized sharing it that the grotto plays such an important role in my life, and truly is one of the reasons that i chose to attend notre dame. this image has only become stronger for me, as my relationship with my faith i feel has strengthened since coming to notre dame, and the grotto continues to be one of my sacred spaces on campus. the fact that i am never alone at the grotto has reminded me on several occasions that i am not alone on campus in general. especially coming back from fall break, i encountered so 4 much feeling of self-guilt, of loneliness, that nothing i did was right, especially as a friend. my roommate’s father was put in hospice right as the break ended, and she had to fly home the monday we returned, just to fly back tuesday night, and i had no idea what to do. so i did what i do most of the time when i have no clue: i called my dad. just to hear his voice reassured me that i did not have to know what to do, and i felt better about the situation, even though there was nothing truly that i could do. but one thing he recommended i do was to visit the grotto if i was called to do so, and to listen for the guidance of the holy spirit. going back to my dorm that night, i was so lonely without my roommate, and while it was not my father, and i had only known her for a few months, i felt so strongly that i needed to do something. a close friend of both my roommate and i went down to the grotto with me, and to find the grotto filled with students, and to have him next to me, reminded me that i was not alone at notre dame, that i would never have to be alone. just like we discussed in week 9, just as emery bergmann put it,, “the hardest thing to tell struggling freshmen is that acclimation takes time — and ‘thriving’ even longer” (advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9) each day following fall break, i went to the grotto, sometimes to pray, sometimes to just sit and be in the presence of god and mary, the love of the holy spirit that quelled my anxieties and reminded me to breathe. i found so much hope in going to the grotto, in the ritual of finding hope in the people i prayed with. going to the grotto seemed so obvious, to be reminded that, as found in the screwtape letters of week 12, we are so obviously made in the image and likeness of god, that he wants us to take his hand when we need it, that, as we saw in the beautiful sculpture brought in for us, that god is always there reaching out to us when we need a hand, so full of love, patience, and hope (the screwtape letters “chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188325?module_item_id=105117 5 my self-image throughout my time thus far has fluctuated: as an academic, my idea of perfection has swayed; as a friend, i feel that i am still figuring out how to build relationships with people that are meaningful to me; as a creative mind, i feel that i have not been able to exercise; as a light, i have been bouncing between feeling drained and excited. as an academic, during high school, my image of myself always came with a large mountain of books or sitting at a desk late into the night, with near-perfect grades, doing work instead of going out with friends, or prioritizing homework over friend-time during lunch. i sacrificed relationships with friends for relationships with teachers, which in the end immensely benefited my ability to ask questions and seek out greater discussion with adults in my life, but i was nervous to build relationships in college because of this experience in high school. since my transition to college, not only have i encountered meaningful relationships with professors who i feel i can talk with outside of class, but also with peers academically and personally. whenever i find that i need help with classes, there has always been someone to be there for me, to talk out a math problem while frantically attempting to finish a problem set at 2am in the hesburgh library, or going to the writing center for the first time after feeling overwhelmed and defeated after receiving a grade back in a class. i continue to struggle with the image of perfectionism, but have learned that the greatest growth comes from failure, and that it is okay to fail. my image of myself has transformed also in the expectations that i hold for myself. i expect myself to maintain good grades, but also to build relationships with those that i can be vulnerable with and can be vulnerable with me. i expect myself to have reasons for taking 6 classes or participating in activities that align with who i want to be, with strengthening myself physically, emotionally, academically or spiritually. i expect myself to be who i am, and to take a step back and breathe when i feel that i am not being true to myself, because i have found that the easiest thing to do is to fail myself because of expectations set so high, but that the most growth comes from rebuilding my own brokenness. what i have found to be the most beautiful images, though, are that through the holy spirit, through the relationships i have created, i always have someone there to hand me superglue or a screwdriver when i need it, someone to light my path with a smile or laugh when my flame needs more oxygen, someone to rock my boat when i need to grow, someone to be my rock when i feel unsteady on my own feet, and most importantly, the image of someone helping me up after i have fallen on my hike that is life with an outreached, full-of-love hand saying, “i got you, buddy.” integration two the notre dame experience: my thoughts and feelings over my journey so far at notre dame, it has become clear to me that adjusting to college is a long, complicated process. when i first arrived, it was a very exciting, yet nerve wracking experience. many people, including myself, felt obligated to talk to everyone and try to make as many friends as possible. however, this transition into college made many people feel out of place and uneasy. if you didn’t immediately find a group of friends or enjoy the activities, it felt lonely and isolating. nevertheless, the quote by emery bergmann in the article, “advice from a formerly lonely college student'' describes how many incoming freshmen had these same feelings at first. she reports her thoughts of the first few weeks at college, stating that “i couldn’t seem to enjoy parties, feel comfortable on campus, or just meet people who i wanted to spend more time around. i felt so lost and beyond confused” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). it is difficult to accept that my best college friends may take months, if not a few years to find. this entire process is one that will take time to figure out. emery bergmann wants us to realize that this is completely normal. yet, as the days pass and we approach the end of the first semester, i feel more confident and comfortable already. i feel like i better understand the expectations for my classes, am more familiar with the social settings, and have established closer relationships with the people in my hall. all of this took time, but everything has significantly improved since the start of the year. i feel like by the end of it all, i will have some of the greatest memories and experiences of my life. here at notre dame, i believe that community is one of the most important parts of the college. one essential aspect of community is the way that we respond to and resolve problems in our society. a difficulty that prevents us from properly addressing problems is groups or parties that separate the people. this is a social crisis where like-minded groups of people refuse to believe that their own group is ever at fault. we blame the other groups for problems and refuse to compromise. it causes much controversy and division. this is one of the central challenges of community and problem-solving that father jenkins includes in the "wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address". in the speech it is emphasized that “we cannot pretend to stand outside this. we are woven into it” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins moreau fye week ten). this shows our responsibility to love and help one another, regardless of political ideologies, race, or gender. we are all part of this great community, so it is our job to unite and make notre dame the best place it can be. this is particularly relevant with issues such as covid-19. rather than be divided by parties or other ideologies, we must come together and do everything we can to make sure we are safely able to learn. this will ensure we receive the best experience possible at notre dame. another important concept discussed is the idea of change. how we change to deal with certain issues is a question that we must ask ourselves. a quote in the video “diversity matters” by professor agustin fuentes shows that racism and injustices can be changed. he talks about how race is not a reflection of biological groups, but instead is due to social and historical contexts. he claims that “race and inequality matter, but they are not fixed” (“diversity matters” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). it is clear that we can limit the amount of racism in our world. by coming together and challenging societal or historical views, racism can be minimized. all of this shows that discrimination, racism, along with other problems are able to be fixed and do not have to be permanent. many ongoing issues can be resolved through an open mind and the want for change. this goes back to the idea of community and how to resolve problems. it takes the whole community to come together and put race, gender, and other barriers aside. if we do this, we can make changes at notre dame that improve our campus and the tight connection between students. we have a very diverse student body at our school. everyone comes from different backgrounds, stories, and experiences. it is important that we are accepting of these differences and can change our attitudes if we are not accustomed to such a diverse community. one of the last important concepts introduced is the way towards positive growth and development. the importance of both faith and education is something we must consider when attending a catholic university like notre dame. a quote in the text by father james b. king describes a belief held by basil anthony moreau. he wrote that “the work of education is essential to the life of the church and its apostolic mission” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week twelve). in the text with moreau, it is clear that he had strong morals and values. he worked hard toward integrating faith and education. it is evident from this, that he wanted certain principles to be emphasized in life. this plan that moreau so closely followed led him on the path towards positive growth. in my life, i hope to have these same strong principles. a strong sense of faith, tight community, and hard work ethic are all things that will lead to my development. additionally, i must follow the principles highlighted at notre dame. these include mind, heart, zeal, family, and hope. these strong foundations are something that will allow me to become the best version of myself. those that establish values and live their life by them, are constantly bettering themselves and working towards positive growth. moreau integration 1 ellis 1 andrew whittington moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 a duty to know, love, and serve god, in his great love, has given me many blessings, one of which is the opportunity to be a part of the notre dame community. at notre dame, i have encountered great diversity in worldviews, political viewpoints, faiths, and upbringings. i find this diversity to be a great gift and opportunity for me to share my love with others. because i have received so much love from god and others in my life, it is my responsibility to share that love with others. in order to love and serve god and others, it is necessary to know others in a deep, personal way, which is enabled by notre dame’s diverse community. my first core belief is that i have been greatly blessed by god, and thus much is expected of me. i have been blessed in many ways, like in my talents, my economic status, my health, and most importantly my spiritual upbringing. a quote that describes this well is in my “where i’m from” poem, in which i say, “i am from the church; baptized and confirmed, never strayed from the path” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). i find it extremely lucky that i was raised in the catholic church and that my parents are both good spiritual role models for me. it takes some people their entire lives to find the correct religion, which i believe is catholicism, and i consider it a great blessing and advantage that i was raised in this way. growing up catholic has also given me a purpose and general worldview that makes almost every aspect of life easier. in david fagerberg’s article, he explains how life’s purpose becomes more clear with faith, and we are able to see god by just looking around. he says, “god https://docs.google.com/document/d/1voox8vsztmx7zflwt30jjy_exsyv_ezohi2xajfrfz4/edit?usp=sharing ellis 2 discloses himself, faith responds, and then we can see with new eyes” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). because i can see god through my faith, i am able to hear his message, which guides my life and also prevents me from getting caught up in worldly problems. my faith allows me to live a life full of joy, and i can fully utilize the talents god gave to me to help others. david brooks described how our external, marketable virtues stem from our internal, moral virtues, and he quoted reinhold niebuhr in saying, “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love” (“should you live your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). this sentiment guides my life because every talent i have, internal and external, is only possible through god. like in the parable of the man who buried his talents, god expects us to utilize the gifts he gives us, which is why i think a lot is expected of me. i believe that i have been utilizing my talents well by putting my full effort into my faith, hobbies, and schoolwork, but i believe there is always more to accomplish. my second core belief is that i have a duty to share the love i receive from others. i receive love from god, my family, my friends, and even other people in my life, but one of the greatest sources of love is my parents. as i said in my “where i’m from” poem, “i am from two loving parents; who always selflessly provide, never shying from giving gifts” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). my parents have shown love to me in every way possible, and they also raised me in a way to recognize how god loves me too. i also have developed many life-giving friendships with others. olivia taylor says about friendships, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). friendships cultivate https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&feature=emb_title https://docs.google.com/document/d/1voox8vsztmx7zflwt30jjy_exsyv_ezohi2xajfrfz4/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1voox8vsztmx7zflwt30jjy_exsyv_ezohi2xajfrfz4/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ ellis 3 growth in both members, and they are not merely just for having fun. because i receive a great amount of love from others, i believe i also have a duty to share my love with others. however, sharing love is not always easy. brene brown said about her study, “[the wholehearted] just talked about [vulnerability] being necessary… they talked about the willingness to say, ‘i love you’ first” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). brown says that saying “i love you,” even to people who love greatly, still requires vulnerability. to share love means to be vulnerable and form relationships with people that differ from oneself. at notre dame, i have formed very diverse friendships, and it is a continued goal of mine to make friends with those who do not have the same life experience as i do. a third core belief of mine is that i have to widen my perspective to know, love, and serve others. catholicism teaches that in order to serve god we must serve others. also, in order to serve god we must love him, and in order to love god we must know him. this means that to serve others, we must know and love them, which requires a broad perspective. chimamanda ngozi adichie described how narrow perspectives can limit our view of other people when she said, “so that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie week 7). in order to not have a “single story” for a group of people, we must know them in a way beyond what third parties tell us. we must personally get to know others to truly know their stories and to love them. in notre dame’s video “it’s on us nd,” the students describe that it is a necessity to know and love others. one student references genesis in saying, “it’s on us to be our brother and sister’s keeper” (“it’s on us ndthe three d’s of being an active bystander” by notre dame moreau week four). it is our responsibility to serve others, not merely just a suggestion. carla harris echoes this point in her first “pearl” of wisdom, in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view ellis 4 which she says, “it is what you do for others that counts” (“2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5). the purpose of life is to serve god and thus serve others. personal accomplishments are good, but how we serve others is what really matters. in order to serve god and others, i am continuing to express vulnerability in forming diverse relationships at notre dame so that i am able to have a broadened perspective and properly love others. the great love from god and others is visible in my life, and i have a duty and a desire to share that love with others. notre dame harbors a diverse community of individuals, all with different experiences and worldviews, which creates the perfect opportunity to broaden one’s perspective of other groups of people. i would like to respond to god’s love by serving him and others, which requires me to be vulnerable and have an accurate view of others’ experiences. at notre dame, i will continue to fulfill my duty in life and make use of the blessings god has given me by knowing, loving, and serving others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 capstone integration pierpoint 1 professor retartha moreau 29 april 2022 following my heart drafting personal mission statements often has the ability to lead to self-discovery, revealing knowledge that previously may not have been known. personal mission statements give us the opportunity to get to know ourselves better and tangibly guide our life in the direction that will provide us with a sense of purpose and self-identity. as my time as a notre dame freshman comes to a close, i reflect on the past eight/nine months and how much personal growth i have witnessed, but also look forward to the growth that will come with each passing year. i strive to always stay true to my beliefs, my core values –– integrity, honesty, compassion, inclusion, fair-mindedness –– so that my life can be lived by my moral code. i do not give in to my anxiety or insecure thoughts but rather maintain confidence as i approach new obstacles in life: i will honor my needs and, from time to time, self reflect on my behavior, thoughts, emotions, motivations. my heart guides me in important decisions, allowing myself to choose what is best for me, follow my passions, and what will lead me to happiness and fulfillment. and finally, i will unregretfully be myself; if people do not click with me, i will not blame myself or search for problems, but rather accept who i am and, ultimately, feel proud of who i become. ever since middle school, my core values of integrity, honesty, compassion, inclusion, and a nonjudgmental attitude have defined how i live my life and treat others. these core values have not changed as i aged, implementing them into everyday life; however, through my college experience, i have truly understood their importance. i have some of the most amazing people pierpoint 2 that i am so grateful to call my friends and each of us have had social conflicts this year. i had a roommate who made my living environment extremely hostile and she treated me and my friends very poorly as time went on. i have always applied my core belief of kindness and compassion towards others, inevitably avoiding conflict and always trying my best to please others: i soon learned that my core beliefs apply to me just as much as those around me. i slowly realized that i have the ability to treat myself with kindness and i no longer have to let people walk all over me. with each confrontation, i was honest, civil, and respectful of both opinions, but i no longer allowed myself to be the brunt of other people’s struggles. this was an extremely difficult lesson to learn, but when i look back, i understand how important it was in my growth as an independent woman. this mission to always remain kind, honest, and inclusive will continually be challenged with social conflict and other difficult situations throughout my remaining time as a notre dame student, as well as throughout the rest of my life. however, through my growth in applying my core values to myself as an individual, i came to appreciate my self value more than ever. additionally, i also appreciated my friendships as my core beliefs could be reflected in the friends that i have moved close to. in week 7, we discussed the relationships of a life well-lived, and i am now aware that those who have similar beliefs of kindness, compassion, honesty, and integrity are people that i yearn to surround myself with. furthermore, during week 9, i came to value the importance of accompaniment: i will always be there for my friends no matter what the circumstances are. my core values extend farther than just being compassionate, but also always showing up whenever the people in my life need someone who can listen and have a shoulder to cry on. this portion of my mission statement will remain the same throughout the entirety of my life as i truly recognize the gravity of treating myself and others with respect, inclusion, compassion, and humility. pierpoint 3 as someone who struggles with anxiety, it can be effortless to give in to its desires and its voices as life brings about new struggles. before coming to college, i was extremely nervous about how my anxiety would manifest itself differently than in highschool; would it be worse, would i allow myself to go out of my comfort zone? even though college was a large step up from high school in regards to work load, i have found myself managing my anxiety better than ever before. instead of saying no to every social event so i could study and earn an “a,” i decided to start venturing out, meeting new people and pushing myself to focus on my mental health. it is difficult to articulate, but i saw a tangible alteration in myself in which i became more confident with myself, not always walking on eggshells with the intention to please. this segment of my mission statement could arguably be the most important in how i want to orient my life: i cannot live a life well lived if i am not honoring my needs and staying in tune to my mental health. it is obviously very difficult to live out this mission with each and every day, but i will make a conscious effort to check in with myself and prevent my feelings from boiling over. during my future time at nd, my anxiety will fluctuate with increasing workload or even in social environments, but with each obstacle comes the ability to strengthen my responses with overwhelming emotions. through each roadblock, i will strive to remain confident in my abilities as i cannot achieve my goals if i do not believe in myself. my anxiety no longer controls me, but i, instead, have the power to control my anxiety. as i continue to age, i become more conscious of the role that choosing passions (over materialistic gains for example) has in determining my happiness. throughout high school, there were a variety of activities that i participated in so i could add it to my college resume, even though it didn’t influence any feelings of joy, instead enumerating my daily stress levels. throughout college, i had the liberty and the freedom to choose what i wanted to be involved in pierpoint 4 and, i didn’t realize this until now, by following my passions, i was enjoying participating more and more. this awareness proves very important for my future as i will continue to strive for the path that encourages my passions and desires rather than choosing the path that could provide more stability within my comfort zone. i hope that in my remaining time as a notre dame student, i will continue to follow my heart, permitting my hunger for medicine and helping others to trump all other struggles and obstacles. furthermore, my friends around me will know if i am following my heart or if i am just listening to the voices of others and i hope, that as the people who know me best, can tell me to reflect on my previous frequent behaviors and force me to rethink my future decisions so that whatever lies ahead of me, i know that my passions drove each and every one of my choices. finally, i will unregretfully be myself, reminding myself that i can be confident of who i am and who i continue to be. in just eight months, i have seen a tremendous amount of growth in myself as a young, independent woman. it is almost as if i finally grew into myself, i finally began to feel proud of my accomplishments, appreciate my strengths, and work towards improving my weaknesses. i have grown in wisdom and (continue to try to) embrace myself as who i am. accepting who we are is a pivotal moment in life in which some of our internal insecurities and struggles seem a little lighter. however, this is a type of act in which it continues; in other words, as we age and evolve, a sense of acceptance still needs to be cultivated. i will need to act with courage, face my fears and failures, and refrain from linking my self worth with my academics. in order to strengthen this part of my mission statement i am going to repeat the sentence, “god grant me the serenity to accept the things i can not change, courage to change the things i can, wisdom to know the difference.” even though this serenity prayer may seem simple, it provides me with the ability to accept myself and feel confident with pierpoint 5 who i am. it is definitely easier said than done to not care about what others think of me, but i will strive to make it a point that i cannot control other people and their beliefs: the only thing i can do is be myself and that is the best i can do. when coming to college and especially committing to gateway, the uncertainty of my freshman year seemed to loom over me for an extended period of time as i had no idea whether i would be happy or if this risk would be right for me. now after living in south bend for more than half of a year, i indubitably know that i made the right decision. i have never felt more like myself than i did during fall semester. spring semester brought a multitude of highs and lows, but with obstacles came a personal growth i never could have imagined. i worked harder than ever, but i also did not let my anxiety rule over me, i pushed myself out of my comfort zone and saw myself blossom into a more secure woman. i believe that with each coming year i am going to revise the mission statement that i have written above and do my best to live out my goals and aspirations. notre dame has influenced so much self growth in just one year and i am so excited to see how i will continue to grow and flourish over the course of four years. week 14-capstone integration three peter o’connor moreau fye mr. retartha 29 april, 2022 a personal mission statement is a declaration of the things that matter to you. it outlines what is important and what drives you. it is a collection of goals and morals that you adhere to everyday. my personal mission statement encompasses my experiences of the first nineteen years of my life and projects what i want for the future. in the past year my life has changed dramatically. adjusting to college, living away from my family, meeting new people, and taking on new responsibilities. the following is a collection of advice on how to live a life well lived. the digital age is something unique to my generation. everything we have ever done and ever will do will be recorded on the internet. we have unprecedented access to information and this has given us unbelievable opportunities and has also exposed us to unthinkable mistakes.“the amount of data humanity will collect while you’re reading the art of stillness is five times greater than the amount that exists in the entire library of congress.”(why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). everyday we process an incomprehensible amount of data and information. working on a computer provides us with more information than anyone else in history. in order to adhere to my mission statement and live the life i want to live it is important to have safe practices on the internet. no matter what you do, someone on the internet is going to hold you accountable. this new culture will always be prevalent and forces us to be our best selves as much as possible. we can take this as a https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ problem or as a challenge. i try to put my best foot forward everytime i venture on the internet and to shape my digital footprint the way i want to. the current age we live in is one of progress. the ability to shape the future and create a better world for everyone that lives in it is an inspiring fact. we have reached unprecedented levels of equality in all aspects of society and we will only further that in my lifetime. ”father hesburgh was one of the giants of the civil rights movement”(“hesburgh” by correta scott king moreau fye week two) to know that my university is forever connected with one of the greatest endeavors in american history is something that inspires me. father hesburgh was truly an american hero and someone that all catholic and notre dame students should look up to. his drive for change is something that i want to see in my own life and something i want to bring to the world. life is nothing without joy. it is what we strive for everyday and it is what makes life fulfilling. joy can be found in the things that truly shape our lives. “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) a life well lived is not complete without a true sense of joy. some things that bring me joy include my family, my friends, and notre dame. to achieve true joy is not an easy task but it is a rewarding goal. joy can be found in reflection. joy can be found in prayer. joy can be found in the relationships i form. i look forward to finding joy today, i look forward to finding joy tomorrow, and i look forward to finding joy in my life. my career is always going to be an integral part of my life. your job is where you spend most of your time in life and if it is something you love you will be a very happy person. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip”(“navigating your career journey” by https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ merulo center for career development moreau fye week four). i know my desired career will be a difficult journey but is a journey i am excited to undertake. doing multiple internships, networking with different people, and growing my technical skills are all important aspects of what i want to do. i want to have my career so i can provide a life for the people i love and accomplish the goals i have set for myself. the university of notre dame is going to enable me to achieve these career and life goals and i am eternally grateful for the opportunities i have been given here. reflection is an essential aspect of living a life that fulfills. taking time out of your day to disconnect and focus on your personal growth is essential to be successful.“this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” (“the right way to be introspective( yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). it is very easy to get caught up in what bothers you and what holds you back. it is important to think things through and analyze the bigger picture in your life. the journey of life is never going to be black and white and there are times where you will struggle. knowing what matters to you and what drives you will make you a much better person and a much more understanding person. taking the time to know yourself is an investment that is guaranteed to be successful. the most important thing in life is happiness. there is no doubt in my mind that happiness should be prioritized above all else. “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). happiness comes in many different forms and many different ways. you can find happiness in the people you meet, the places you go, and the things you enjoy. happiness and joy https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript have a very interconnected relationship. some things that bring me happiness are the new england patriots, the fighting irish, the boston red sox, my family, my friends, and the beach. these are all essential components to my life and things i want to prioritize. these things contribute to my overall happiness and are things i seek out in life. compassion and empathy are essential qualities in anyone that thinks of themselves as a good person. “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) having an understanding for those around you and caring about other people in your life can be a source of joy for yourself and others. listening to people’s feelings, helping in your community, and donating time and money to charities you care about is a great way to live a life well lived. community service is something that has helped me grow as a person and is something i encourage everyone to undertake. the state of racial equality in this country should worry every american citizen. while we have made exceptional steps in the search of equality we still have a considerable distance to go. “if you are white i urge you to take the first step — let go of your racial certitude and reach for humility.” (“what it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” byrobin diangelo moreau fye week ten) it is undeniable that white people have been given a considerable advantage in life. regardless of your economic situation white people have had an easier time with the justice system and police. the way to change this comes from a widespread change in culture. we must take steps to change the system and the way we view race and our own biases. a life well lived is not complete without racial equality. we have the ability to change things in this life and we must try. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit today’s approach to political discord is dangerous. the two sides are further apart than they have ever been and this comes from lack of dialogue. ”echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles” (“how to avoid an echo chamber ” by paul blashkomoreau fye week eleven) we do not talk to people the way we used to. everything is a competition and the otherside is always out to get us. hyperbole and dishonesty are far too common in our current political state and must change. the best way to do this is to drop our biases and our reservations and try to have productive conversations with the people we disagree with. many people do not realize how similar we all are and would rather live in a state of conflict because it is convenient. in the past three years we have lived through some truly life changing historical events. the covid-19 pandemic and the summer of 2020 will be analyzed in history textbooks for generations to come. “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us.”(“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus colemoreau fye week twelve). it is impossible to ignore the need for change and progress in our country. we cannot allow tragedies like george floyd’s to be commonplace. we have the ability to change and we must. overall, a life well lived is something achievable for all of us. we have our own individual hopes and dreams that we will try and achieve. we know what drives us and what is important. our life has just begun and we are alive in the age of progress, technology, independence, and wonder. we know what we must do and i must say that i am excited to do it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ greer father kevin sandberg moreau 3 december 2021 archimedes to me: move the world three centuries before christ’s birth, archimedes stated, “give me a place to stand and with a lever i will move the whole world.” this statement, over three thousand years later, still speaks to essential components of life that aspiring leaders would relate to. within this paper i will evaluate this quote and how i see it in relation to my life. i will give context to who i am, who i have been, and who i hope to become. earlier this year, i wrote a poem describing where i’m from. i opened this poem with the statement, “i’m from the place with the lights on the bridge” (week 6). to me, this line has multiple layers of meaning. the lights show how people and events from my past have signaled me towards my current path. the idea that one of the most memorable landmarks from my hometown is a bridge also speaks to how often i was looking for a way out. while my home was great in comparison to other situations that i have heard stories about, i became very aware that my family, friends, and community were far too toxic for me to continue living with them. i felt as if i was corroding and my environment was anything but a healing one. “we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we are alone in thinking that way,” (elizabeth cox, week 9). i was broken and felt as if there was no place for me to go to for safety. the lights on the bridge were symbolic of a departure guided by hope, but bridges go both ways, meaning my connection was not fully lost. where i’m from can never change, and i will always have a bond with baton rouge, but as i lived there i often felt unbalanced, and i left in search of a place to stand. give me a place to stand. something that i find beautiful in archimedes’ quote is how many different ways it can be interpreted. the current place that i stand is the university of notre dame. by simply attending this university, a number of opportunities have already been presented to me that others have not been afforded. the institution of notre dame has respect across the world and as i advance from my education into the real world i have no doubt that my placement at notre dame will be essential to my success in whatever field i go into. something that notre dame has already provided me with is people to stand with. since arriving at the university i have grown closer to some of my peers than i ever have before. “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (week 4). i genuinely believe that i have made friends who will be with me my whole life. we stand together and lift each other to our feet whenever someone is down. i am incredibly grateful to be surrounded by people who make an effort to know me on a deep level. these close friends make me a better person every day that i grow closer to them. give me something to stand for. along with the platform on which i hope to impact the world positively, and the individuals who i will meet along the way who i will work with to do so, i must stand for and stand up for something in my life. i hope that when people think of me, i represent attributes of love and kindness. i hope to stand up with those in need of help. “we cannot love the god who we do not see if we don’t love the brother who we do see” (week 5). in the same way that i hope to love god through love of neighbor, i also strive to represent to the best of my ability, a christ-like approach, no matter how unattainable it may be. where will i stand? as far as what platform i will stand on in the future as i attempt to make my impact on the world, i am uncertain. part of my journey while on notre dame’s campus is to find the next step. i have no doubt that the university, the skills and the opportunities that it will present to me will help me to be placed in the right spot for my future. what is my lever? i believe that there are a number of tools that i have been provided with that i can hopefully use to better the world. i believe that god has provided me with natural gifts so that i can use them for the common good. i believe that i have been given gifts of intelligence and opportunities to grow through my education. i believe that i have strong relationship skills and i am only improving in this area of my life. i believe that i have been given skills that promote unity and communication between opposing parties. it is my responsibility to make use of the tools and opportunities that i have been provided with. i will move the whole world. i believe that this claim may come off as more arrogant than it is in reality. as i have highlighted previously, both the ground that i stand on and the skills i’ve been granted are god-given and helped along by my peers and mentors. if i were to not make use of the gifts and opportunities presented to me that would be irresponsible and morally wrong. i believe that as long as if i can increase the level of good within the world i should. there is a well known quote from uncle ben to peter parker in the spiderman comics, “with great power comes great responsibility.” i believe that every person has great power and it is the responsibility of each individual to discern what the right path for them is to use their power. let’s move the world. i think that the idea of moving the whole world presented by archimedes is overly individualistic, likely in order to maintain the simplicity of his statement. as i’ve mentioned previously i plan to stand with others in order to move the whole world, and i also believe that part of moving the whole world occurs through chain reaction. the growth of the world can only happen through community collaboration and efforts to improve. while one individual cannot be solely responsible for great impacts, that does not diminish the good that a person can do. i hope that by the end of my life i have made a great impact in the way that i was intended to. “our lives are not our resumes.” (week 5). often it is easy to think about our ideal futures in terms of jobs and measurable goals being achieved, but as it comes to moving the world, i think that this cannot come without the development of christ-like virtues within me. there have been terrible men who were given a platform, skills, and were able to move the world in a negative direction. i hope to lead toward good. i hope to ask questions and learn what i can while accepting i won’t know everything. i hope to take risks in order to capitalize on opportunity. i hope to love those around me and hope to improve the lives of others. i hope to move the world. prof. thigpen moreau first year experience 03 december 2021 oh, the places i’ve gone, the things i’ve done now that i am finishing up my first semester of freshman year in college, i can say that i have encountered a lot of things. not all were comfortable experiences, but they were all beneficial in some manner. the number one take away from all the experiences, whether good or bad, was to learn from them, and that will continue to be my philosophy. the very first encounter of my college career began before i even stepped foot on campus. i was accepted to notre dame which was a surreal moment for me as a high schooler who had no clue what they wanted to do in life beyond my hometown. i was a straight-a student who had never failed at a large scale, and i could feel that some failures were coming my way in college as i tried to navigate my way through the first year: “we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). i have struggled a lot in life, most frequently with imposter syndrome. i would always work hard in school and sports and work hard in every aspect of my life because it gave me a challenge and i wanted to see to the end of it and be successful. i am very internally motivated which is a double-edged sword because it became too harsh when i didn’t reach a goal i had set for myself, and often i became too hyper focused on the task at hand. i was reaching a lot of my goals and was very successful in school and sports. however, looking around at other people i had doubts about if i really was good enough. first issue, what is “good enough?” to me, “good enough” was perfection and what would actually be considered “good enough” was failure. i had it skewed from the beginning. and then to watch others excel with what looked like very little effort, i became confused. i thought that i shouldn’t have to work this hard to be at the same level, when in reality they were putting in the same amount of work, if not more. getting accepted into notre dame felt validating after years of hard work, however there was still a nagging feeling of doubt. needless to say, now that i am here, i can somewhat trust that i was accepted intentionally, not by accident because it is starting to feel like home. with some of my encounters, i have been tempted to respond with judgment and hatred. however, that is only going to make the situation worse, and i will probably never learn from it in a way that will benefit me: “hatred is not out there. it is in here—ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). i had a high school english teacher who was very open about what he believed. coming from a more conservative suburb, it was a wake-up call for a lot of us on the topics he wasn’t afraid of bringing up in class. i for one did not agree with him, but i could never tell what other people were thinking because knowing when he would shut people down versus accept their viewpoint was a tricky line to toe. if someone offered a view different from his, it was shut down completely and people learned quickly not to speak up. his so-called “open-mindedness” and “tolerance” was quite the opposite. i sat in that class listening to his points, yet when it was my turn to speak, he couldn’t even fathom listening. i was not without fault, however, because i could feel my hatred inside me nearly boiling over each day in class. i hated the fact that his hatred was in guise of being tolerate. now that i look back on it, his “hatred” for the other side was from the fact he thought he was the one with virtue, and he would never be able to let that go until the other side believed what he believed in. i also realized that i could not let go of my own hatred for the seemingly obvious hypocrisy until my teacher realized it himself. this wasn’t going to work because he had his own hatred, so i had to move forward, and i decided to learn from him how i didn’t want to be in the future. this was a learning opportunity and an encounter that was new to me and eye-opening. a lot of my experiences here at notre dame will be centered around forming community. i need to respond in a way that will cultivate an environment for community to flourish, not in a way that inhibits its growth: “when we act on the scarcity assumption it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy through a process called resentment, and people are rendered incapable of community” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). i am definitely guilty of holding grudges and holding court when i see an injustice. i can’t help but try and find order in the world and see through that everything is fair. usually, it comes in the form of keeping track of how much i help around the house compared to my sisters. i become so hyper focused on what they are not doing, i don’t truly appreciate it when they are helping around the house when i can’t. it is impossible to keep everything in a neat and tidy score column for everything, and if i want to build stronger bonds with people during the times i look at what they aren’t doing, i will need to look at the relationship from a different approach. reciprocity is the key, and it is different than keeping score. it is about helping out while i can and, in the future, someone will help me out when i am unable. i need to see the good that they bring to the table and call upon their resourcefulness. besides learning from my experiences, it will also be important for me to recognize that i am not alone in my experiences. i can turn to other people for help, or even better i can turn to god during challenging experiences: “there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift” (“holy cross and christian education” by blessed basil moreau – moreau fye week twelve). i think that it is easy to catastrophize a lot of the hardships we face in life and isolate ourselves from others when we do go through challenging times. we think that this challenge that i failed is the end-all-be-all or that i am the only one that struggles with this common challenge. we are not alone in the human sense because everyone has their ups and downs in life, however, we are also not alone spiritually. god is right there all along, and if we need reminding, we can always look at the cross. it gives us hope that he will always be there, and that he went through a much more gruesome suffering so that we could be saved. there is nothing that he cannot make a blessing, and i think it is easy to lose sight of just how common our sufferings can be. broadening my perspective on how these experiences affected me will help me respond more effectively to any of my encounters in life. mark padilla to embody that which i am i believe that i am searching for acceptance, a sense of belonging, and for the next four years to be something i can call the best years of my life. vulnerability is something that i most certainly struggle with during times like these, however, i believe that after getting past all of the stress and negative emotions, we will eventually find the joy or light at the end of the tunnel. i believe that one needs to build up the courage inside to become vulnerable to those around them, which most likely leads to a sense of belonging when they are finally understood or acknowledged. according to brene brown, “ they believe that what made them vulnerable, made them beautiful. they didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor it being excruciating, as i heard it earlier in the shame interview, they just talked about it being necessary. they talked about the willingness to say i love you first. the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) being vulnerable isn't something that can magically come with ease; however, it is something that we can work towards showing because getting past all of the uncomfortable and bad feelings inevitably leads to emotions like joy. with this, i believe i would be able to find what i am searching for throughout my time at notre dame. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by simply being myself and socializing. i believe that trying to project yourself to being something you’re not can be very detrimental to the well-being of a person, because, at that point, the person may like you but not for who you truly are. the initial step of starting a conversation, which is likely the hardest part, is over. what’s next is growing along with those people and slowly building up a connection. in the text, it says, “if the majority of the things that come out of your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them.” ( 5 signs you're in a toxic friendship, by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) those people who share similar values as you will most likely stay and become your best of friends. at notre dame, joining clubs are a good way to meet great people. once you have a sizable amount of people you know, you can start to filter those that will look out for you or not. i believe that by continuing to be yourself, you get to filter out all of the people that don’t necessarily have to be in your life. i don’t mean to say that those filtered out are bad people, however, they may not be the best fit for you to keep a long-term relationship with that person. i believe that i grow by being surrounded by those who care about my wellbeing. those that are doing well themselves can provide the assistance i need to stay on track. surrounding myself with people who show mutual care for our success can not only help me grow but they grow as well. i believe that my community should be the best it can be at any time, any place. i believe that a sense of community is essential when it comes to the overall growth of a person or group of people. a sense of community can greatly affect how a person performs in any setting. with a sense of community, one feels more involved, and when we help those in the community, the community as a whole flourish. back at home, we all encourage each other to go beyond our comfort zones and try new things. i not only enjoy being a part of a supportive community for myself, but i also enjoy helping other students of color in my community. when a community is truly invested in helping its youth succeed, brilliant things happen. i have seen many classmates and friends from church overcome the odds and make it into the college of their choice. despite coming from a poor african-american and hispanic neighborhood, our community keeps pushing for a better future. similarly, i wish to see something like this because i believe it helps me and those around me grown exponentially. i believe that i pursue truth by always questioning things while keeping an open mind. i believe that always keeping an open mind is beneficial because doing so allows you to listen to others’ perspectives on things and allows for your actual knowledge to grow. we can never be too sure about what we know about a subject because there is always something new to learn from others. there is a certain danger that comes from only knowing a single story. a single story is best defined as one side of two possible stories. by knowing only one side of the story, argument, or debate, you are bound to have a bias over the one you were told. one can become ignorant due to only being told a single story and can miss out on different perspectives that can further mold your own. only when you truly know both sides of the story will you be able to share your perspective confidently. according to chimamanda adichie, “my roommate had a single story of africa: a single story of catastrophe. in this single story, there was no possibility of africans being similar to her in any way, no possibility of feelings more complex than pity, no possibility of a connection as human equals.” (danger of a single story, by chimamanda adichie, moreau fye-week eight) knowing only one story is problematic due to the ignorance it causes many people to have. many stereotypes go around without having any shred of truth behind them. this is why i strive to listen to multiple viewpoints before deciding on what my opinion is on the subject. i believe that my purpose is to empower others and become the sort of person worthy of being a role model for my family. i like to believe that everything happens for a purpose and if i got here at notre dame it is because i belong here. of course, there will be doubts, i still have them, yet deep down i know that i worked hard to get to where i am currently at. imposter syndrome can happen to everyone but it’s the way we deal with it or overcome these doubts that matter. i believe that i am made to help others in whatever they may need. ever since i was a kid, i found myself to be the mediator in any setting. i believe that my urge to help people is not a habit or accident. i genuinely feel a need to help those that i can in anything that they may require. additionally, i believe that i am responsible for the image i portray myself to be and the impact i have on those around me. i know that i am not completely invisible and that anything that i do can affect those around me and in my life. i believe one is responsible for such actions that may potentially harm those that stay near us because they care. i am the result of hard work, sacrifice, and determination. i am worth everything and anything if i wish for it. the world is a huge place and there is still so much to learn. i believe that i have everything in me to succeed and become the best version of myself that i can be. i am here at notre dame to embody that which i am. integration two moreau first year experience pedro augusto bolsonaro finding peace in a chaotic world: how do i respond to challenges in my community? as i conclude my first semester at notre dame, time is ripe to look back and reflect on personal growth and engagement within my community. at a personal level, being inserted into a new environment challenged me to respond to external and internal dissonance as i had to escape my comfort zone and adapt to a completely new setting. in the context of our school’s community, i considered what challenges we collectively face, and, particularly from a latino perspective, how to improve diversity and inclusion for international students. finally, we were able to look within ourselves, and understand what gives us hope, ultimately leveraging it to make us grow personally, academically, professionally, and spiritually.  in week nine of the course, students were presented with the opportunity to reflect on how they responded to the major challenges of entering college. these included not only external ones, such as forging new friendships, building rapport with faculty, and networking with potential employers; but also internal ones, such as dealing with academic pressure, confidence, and self-esteem, and living away from family. emily bergmann, in her article on her transition to college, talked about her difficulties in making new friendships, “the worst part was that i felt as if i were the only one who was this lonely. i’d see all these freshmen walk in packs just massive groups of friends already formed in the first two weeks of school. (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine)” i shared many of the concerns that emily mentioned in her article, but this one particularly resonated with me. i remember walking around campus in the first few days of classes it seemed as if everyone had effortlessly made hundreds of friends, whereas i was stuck with just a few. as time went by, however, i started to realize that everyone was in the exact same situation as i was, anxious and scrambling to meet new people. it just was the sheer number of people talking and getting to know each other that gave the impression that everyone had made countless friends. this realization made me understand that making friendships is not as “black and white” as i originally thought. i had this perception that you either “clicked” or not with a person and that ultimately decided whether you would become friends. a lesson that i learned is that what makes a person your friend are the experiences you enjoy together, the conversations you have, and an element of trust. all these factors are bound by the immutable concept of time, which made me realize that not having formed deep friendships in the first weeks is absolutely normal. interestingly, my best friend here at notre dame studied in high school with me, but we rarely talked to each other before coming here. this further proves that it was the experience of getting to know him through experiences, conversations, and most importantly time, that made us become friends. as i continue to make friendships with students i encounter throughout my four-year tenure here at notre dame, i will take these lessons to heart, and focus on building connections not by forcing them, but by naturally letting them occur. as week ten came along, students were encouraged to consider challenges faced by our community and come up with suitable solutions. when referring to my community both at a campus-wide scale as well as at a broader, national level, the challenge i singled out as the most alarming was political polarization. the arrival of social media and the ascension of controversial political topics such as abortion, climate change, and drug legalization, caused a deep division in the political spheres of both brazil and the united states, countries i consider to be, in one way or another, part of. previously to my arrival at notre dame, i paid distant attention to matters surrounding domestic politics; not only did i find them pointless (as it usually circled back to “my opinion is better than yours regardless of what you say”), i also found that there was little i could do that would help solving such issues. in my mind, such disputes were so tribal and close-minded that i had lost faith in the political system. as fr. jenkins warned in his 2012 commencement address, people are “following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others. play the victim. blame the enemy. stoke grievance. never compromise. (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten)” however, as i learned about the impact that notre dame alumni have had on the world, and the clubs that promote different sides here on campus, the more i realize how important it is to become deeply engrossed in such conversations, and truly believe that change can emanate from cooperation and collaboration. for example, i attended a virtual panel hosted by the keough school of global affairs which talked about the 20th anniversary of 9/11 and the united states pulling out from afghanistan after years of war. the event hosted stellar faculty specialized in the topic who were actively working with the united states government, and it make me realize, for the first time, that these are the same faculty that i am learning from. this revelation was so profound and mind-boggling that it made appreciate notre dame’s capacity to empower us students to conduct positive change in the world. in week eleven, students were asked to contemplate on the subject of interconnectedness and consider how connection and community are threatened amidst pervasive conflict and dissimilarity. the content particularly highlighted the strength in diversity and how connection is powered by trust. my experiences as a latino student at notre dame have been invaluable, particularly as i am witnessing firsthand, for the first time in my life, what it feels like to be part of a minority within a community. i believe notre dame does a great job in promoting an inclusive environment for students from all over the world. this is clearly reflected on the student body’s willingness to embrace this diversity and welcome students from all over the globe. in fact, before coming to notre dame, one of my biggest concerns was exactly the uncertainty of being accepted, as a foreigner, into a predominantly american student body. this worry was particularly augmented by the stories i heard from students from other colleges, who were discriminated and left out due to their background. a prominent case of this is my older cousin, matheus, who is now a senior at virginia tech. he said that the difference in culture and upbringing was so acute that he had great difficulty in making friends. at notre dame, however, (and i proudly say this to everyone) i was blown away by the cordiality and welcoming spirit of students, faculty, and staff. it further reinforces my belief that i made the right call in coming to south bend over any place else. to preserve this welcoming atmosphere in our campus, our community must promptly and proactively continue to promote a culture of inclusiveness. to do this, we must not look at others, but at ourselves, and see what we can do to improve our community. only then, we can see that what makes our community strong is in fact our diversity. that is exactly what makes our campus so rich, potent, and interdependent on what another. as parker j. palmer puts it, “by contemplation i mean any way one has penetrated the illusion of separateness and touching the reality of interdependence. (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center of courage and renewal – moreau fye week eleven)”. this realization galvanized me to contribute to the latino community here on campus by joining clubs such as the brazilian student association and alpha, the former conceived to foster brazilian culture at notre dame and the latter turned to promote the professional and academic interests of finance majoring latinos on campus. in these groups i have built rapport with other latinos and participated in events such as webinars and networking initiatives that have helped me connect with potential employers for internships and post-graduation employment.  in week 12, we were asked to reflect on how to live and grow in hope. in contrast to other weeks, where the emphasis was placed on our community, the focus of this week was to look inside ourselves and find the people and things that give us hope. in the context of notre dame’s catholic education, which fuses a critical appreciation of religion with state-of-the-art pedagogy, we are not only incentivized to consider what we learn but also how we learn and why we learn. in the words of fr. james b. king, “in striving for academic excellence, a holy cross education seeks to develop student’s intellectual capacities within the context of a broad curriculum. (“hope holy cross and catholic education” by fr. james b. king, csc moreau fye week twelve)” during the collegiate application process, i questioned whether the spiritual side of education was a factor worth considering when selecting colleges. when i got accepted to notre dame, however, i quickly realized how crucially important this was to my college experience. differently from other colleges, notre dame places a lot of emphasis on discovering who one is within not only the physical world, but also one’s relationship to god. at notre dame, for example, i attend mass every sunday, something that i rarely did back in brazil. the ability to attend mass with your friends and cultivate a feeling of community makes it an incredible experience and definitely gravitates me towards a closer relationship to god. ultimately, notre dame teaches us how to leverage hope, not only in ourselves but also in our brothers and sisters around us, to strive for a better future. i will continue to look within my soul and discern my personal ambitions, use those to identify my ultimate goals in life, and employ the hope that emanates from those to avail myself to the maximum of the possibilities that the school offers to contribute to that end. you may ask in what way will i know if i am heading down the right path. i will respond that it is impossible to know. the only certainty i have is that as long as my heart and mind are at ease in regard to doing my best in fostering community, building a sustainable and prosperous future for myself and my family, and maintaining close proximity to god, i know that he will open the doors and guide me to the correct paths. works cited bergmann, e. (2018). advice from a formerly lonely college student. ny times. jenkins, f. j. (2012). wesley theological seminary commencement. university of notre dame. king, f. j. (2013). hope holy cross and christian education. campus ministry at the university of notre dame. palmer, p. j. (1998). thirteen ways of looking at community . center for courage & renewal. beliefs that make me who i am moreau integration assignment: i believe that i am the only one who can live my life (week 1) now that i’ve been at university for several weeks now, i can clearly see that i am responsible for my own life. no one is going to hold my hand through studying, no one is going to wake me up to get to class on time. i am the only one who can make those decisions for myself. i am truly an independent adult now and that means i need to do stuff myself. from week one, we talked about vulnerability. drawing from brene brown, who says that being vulnerable will result in joy and excitement. i know that i will need to push myself out of my comfort zone to be able to live my life because i am the only one who can do that. (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown) i believe that my qualities make me strong (week 2) in class, we got to talk and share our top five traits that we got from taking the quiz. it was interesting to see how different everyone’s traits were. sure, many had one or two of the same, but no one has all of the same five. from this lesson, i realized that even if my traits are different than others, they still make me strong and who i am. everyone is living their own lives so everyone is going to have their own traits. one of my traits was prudence, which sounds not like a good one. but i am thankful for that trait because even if it makes me sound like an old lady, it makes me strong. from week two, david brooks talks about adam 1 vs adam 2. “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths. adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses.” is a quote that i found interesting, and i hope to continue to grow in both to make me strong. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks). i believe that cultivating a relationship with god is crucial to a happy life (week 3) one of the big deciding factors for me (and many of my classmates) is that i wanted to grow my faith here. after spending many weeks here, i have felt such a loving and supportive presence all around me. whether it’s going to the grotto with my team, attending my dorm mass every sunday night or even walking around campus, i am happy to say that i am a child of god and because of that, i am living a happy life. from week three, father pete talks about how figuring out your path and faith is a self-journey that only you can embark on. how we deal with irritating and unfair “knots” will help us grow as individuals into the person god created us to be. i think with god’s guidance, i’ll be able to do all things. (“the role of faith in our story” from father pete mccormick). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being a good listener (week 4) i have learned in my lifetime that people like to talk about themselves, they like to be heard. i think being able to show someone that you care by listening to them talk about their day or rant is such a powerful way to bond that i believe being a good listener will result in those strong relationships. at the same time though, you want to be able to have that reciprocated. it’s tiring to constantly be asking about their day but not have it be asked back. so being able to see that might be the case then it would make sense to find a life-giving relationship somewhere else because it’s not a friendship if it’s one-sided. the red flag campaign talks about being able to recognize these toxic/unfair relationships so being able to register that is important. starting to create a relationship starts with showing empathy and being able to give your time to hear them out. ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign). i believe that i grow by pushing through challenges. (week 5) it is quite apparent that college life is tough. already, i have had to face many challenges and i know there will be more. but at the same time, i am stronger than i was when i started. challenges are hard but if i can “trust the power in you.” (harris) then i will be able to grit through these challenges to come out on top. the experience you engage in whether they are positive or negative are all things that you can learn from to help you grow. when something challenges you, there’s a moment where you need to decide if you want to stay on those hot coals or not. (“2021 laetare medalist address from carla harris). i believe that life isn’t all about work (week 6) based on the poem that we wrote, i can happily say that my childhood was really great. a lot of those memories and experience have shaped me into the person that i am today. i had so much fun, and i hope that i can continue to be able to live vicariously through my childhood self and know when to slow down, pull back and be able to take a breather. so, i don’t want to feel like to be happy i have to be successful through work. being able to apply an appropriate balance is vital for this idea. (“where i’m from by george ella lyon). i believe that my community should be able to except everyone (week 7) stereotypes, assumptions, and opinions plague our world and the only way to get rid of them is to have these deep conversations about treating everyone with respect and fairness. people are so quick to jump to conclusions and are unable to hear the full side of the story. cancel culture is really something that is dangerous, and people need to understand that we are just people. our community needs to be able to except everyone because we are all trying to live and coexist; we need to expect ever as they are because we would want that treatment for us too. (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks) https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/modules/items/106107 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/modules/items/106107 moreau integration two finding nemo callie my first semester at notre dame has been nothing but interesting so far -i came here expecting months of fitting in, trying to figure out where i stand here, and understanding my classes. yes, i did encounter all those experiences, but i’ve encountered more about myself as well and the relationships i’ve begun to form. most importantly, i’ve started to find myself in this process. one of the main issues i’ve encountered so far is imposter syndrome. first of all, i was not valedictorian in my small high school. with 40 people in my graduating class, i realized not being anywhere near the top of my class made me anxious. everyone at notre dame is extremely intelligent and i, on the other hand, felt like i didn’t belong here -i didn’t understand readings at first and didn’t follow class discussions for the first few weeks. i was also scared i wouldn’t fit in because everyone seemed to have experience with their part-time jobs and many club leaderships; they were also active in sports or ran track & field in high school whereas i had none of those coming from a different country. it wasn’t normal for me to work at a part-time job and we didn’t have as many sports as the us. sometimes, i was kept out of the loop in conversations or i struggled to understand what people were talking about casually; it was almost like i didn’t deserve to be at notre dame. i remember this quote from week 9 “we’re not alone, we’re all kind of going through this experience together” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). when i started deepening my relationships with other people at notre dame and when i started talking to people back home, i realized i wasn’t the only one feeling this way. other people i know who have done amazing things also went through imposter https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html syndrome, and i realized i’m not the only one who goes through this. at a certain point, we question our self-worth and if we really deserve to be where we currently are. i encountered this by understanding and accepting that everyone compares themselves to everyone else and we all have our own difficulties. other people may be so happy on social media, yet they are questioning whether they are living the best versions of themselves. it’s not just a ‘me’ problem. the second issue i encountered is the shame and microaggressions i receive for a part of me that i can’t change -my identity. although i was considered a minority in indonesia, i’ve been surrounded by people who were of a similar race and religion to me -sometimes i forgot i was a part of the minority. however, here, i’m constantly reminded by it; there’s less than 20 people at notre dame who are indonesian, let alone indonesian and catholic. most people around me are white and sometimes i receive unnecessary comments about the way i look and weird questions about what type of food i eat. racism is what leads to the brokenness in this world because people tend to not accept other people who are different from them -they are used to old ways and are used to being surrounded by similar people. our first encounters with people who may look different tend to be uncomfortable; although many people progress from that, many still resist this change. this reminds me of a quote from week 10 “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c. s. c. moreau fye week ten) i don’t have the power to change this hatred that many people have for other races, but i do have the ability to minimize a tiny bit of racism https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ by providing other people with perspectives that i have. i try to talk about my culture with as many people as possible -in most cases, all it takes is a bit of understanding. racism is a danger to a lot of societies, and i hope that we can encounter this together. there is a reason why many at notre dame do not openly try to interact with people of color and i hope to provide them with a reason on why we shouldn’t be ignored. a third issue i’ve encountered is conflict. in middle school and in the first few weeks of high school, i was in a lot of toxic relationships, with me being the reason why they were toxic. i forced myself into being someone i was not and had friendships which didn’t benefit the other party and merely benefitted myself. however, i moved to a different school for junior and senior year of high school, where i felt a lot at home. i realized i didn’t have to try to be someone i was not and i could speak the “same language” without feeling left out. i met the most amazing people who helped me change as a person and who helped me see things from a new light, which i highly appreciate as i’m glad i’ve become the person i am today. i came to notre dame with low expectations -i didn’t expect to know people i clicked with in my first semester. eventually, we had a group of 10 people. i personally felt that it was too fast because we didn’t know everyone that well, but we persisted; eventually, we did have a conflict, leading to a small falling out. however, from what i’ve learnt in the past, conflicts often had a positive outcome; they were bound to happen in the first place, it’s just ugly when they do happen. conflicts are great because they’re eye-opening; you realize who stands by you and who has the same values as you. you deepen friendships with those you truly connect with and who truly care about you, and you start to observe those who don’t stand on the same platform as you. i realized that conflicts in college don’t have to be like high school drama -they don’t have to involve spreading false news, blatantly destroying other people’s relationships, and result in never-ending fire. they just have to involve talks, mature discussions, and eventually, spending more time with the people we love. this reminds me of a quote in week 11 of moreau “community that can withstand hard times and conflict can help us become not just happy but “at home.”” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) some people here have truly been supportive of my decisions and have made me feel at home the way my high school friends have made me feel, and i’ve felt grateful for them. the last issue i’ve encountered so far is my faith. being completely honest with myself, i’ve always had excuses for not going to church before college. i didn’t mind not going to mass and i definitely broke out of my habit of praying everyday despite religion classes. furthermore, my parents have always encouraged me to go to mass -i always said i was busy with schoolwork. i’ve always questioned whether i was religious. i do believe there is a god, and i believed that he put me through tough times so i would return back to my faith, and i think it’s been working so far. a quote from the screwtape letters “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, … asks why he has been forsaken, but still obeys.” (“the screwtape letters” by c. s. lewis moreau fye week twelve) made me realize this. temptation is difficult, and it’s even more difficult to hold onto hope when sometimes you have nothing else to hold onto. however, i’ve realized that holding onto hope is much stronger when your faith is stronger, and one way i would like to encounter this is by making use of notre dame’s resources to strengthen my faith. https://couragerenewal.org/wpccr/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://couragerenewal.org/wpccr/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://www.amazon.com/screwtape-letters-c-s-lewis/dp/0060652934 https://www.amazon.com/screwtape-letters-c-s-lewis/dp/0060652934 i’ve encountered many odd experiences in college that challenge myself and will continue to experience more of these. one way to respond to these is by finding my own values and using my experiences from the past to be a better version of myself for my well-being and for others around me. sometimes, i feel like nemo -lost in a sea of people i don’t know and stranded in a place i’m so unfamiliar with; on the other hand, i’m not like nemo. i never needed anyone to find me; i didn’t need a dory. i just needed myself (and some guidance from others along the way) and will continue to do so going forward. maria finan moreau first year experience 24 november 2021 the path towards independence notre dame is a university that promotes growth in students and challenges them to reach their fullest potential. in turn, the students strive for excellence and success through the topics they learn in class, student clubs, and outside activities. the achievements and challenges we go through help build resilience and experience that allow us to grow as individuals. as we apply the lessons we learn, we become closer and closer to the person we want to become. after coming to notre dame, i have learned a lot through my classes, teachers, friends, and family. with the first semester being almost over, i believe that i have developed in my thoughts, perspectives, and opinions. the moreau first year experience has provided many opportunities for me to reflect and think about what i have encountered. the things i encounter in my life provide important lessons that i can use in my future, while also sharing them with others. although i deal with challenges everyday, i am able to get through them with a positive attitude and an open mind. the pressure to be perfect is placed upon every single person. constantly, we battle with ourselves as we strive to rid our shortcomings. this pressure is nothing new and plagues our minds as we go throughout our lives. however, it is important to understand that “there’s often no threshold of accomplishment that puts these feelings to rest” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). elizabeth cox describes how our feelings of dissonance never truly subside as there will always be the underlying knowledge that there is someone better than you. even as we achieve higher levels of success, humans can never feel satisfied with their work and always feel that they do not deserve their accomplishments. although these feelings will not completely go away, we can try to combat them by talking with others where we realize that we are not the only ones dealing with these problems. understanding that everyone experiences dissonance with themselves can help us accept that we are not perfect beings. i believe that this is important for students to understand as we navigate college life and how we want to approach our future. the high expectations i place on myself are sometimes impossible to achieve, and i have learned to be happy with the things that are feasible. encountering these challenges has led me to find peace within myself where i can improve at my own pace rather than compare myself to others. struggle is something that should be accepted rather than rejected. although we dread the feeling of pain, loss, and sadness, these experiences define who we are and shape how we view life. every person is vulnerable but “it’s a very good thing…because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). she reveals how kintsugi allows people to accept that they are vulnerable as they learn from these experiences. the women are able to understand that many others have gone through struggle and hardships as well, showing that they are not alone. it is important to understand that by continuing to grow towards your best self, you can develop as a mature, happy person. rather than having your struggles pull you back, you should let them provide life lessons that you can apply to your future. i am glad that our society is evolving to be inclusive of all people. you never know what issues people may be dealing with, but it is important to not judge them and open up to them. encountering struggle is important for us to develop as individuals and understand that everyone is dealing with their own issues, bringing us closer together. as we continue to globalize our world and perspective, diversity is inevitable. however, there are still many people unfamiliar with this concept and actively resist diverse communities. prof. agustin fuentes explains that “racism and racial bias is implicit in the american experience” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). he demonstrates how american culture is heavily influenced by implicit bias in regards to race. even though the united states is the most diverse country in the world, we still suffer from racism and segregation. however, race is something that is changeable, meaning that the idea of race is different from the past and will be different in the future. this is why diversity matters. we care about diversity because different races and cultures show us how different people view the world. i believe it is important to be aware of the struggles that minorities face everyday in the us. instead of ignoring it, we need to own up to our mistakes and find solutions that are honest and respectful towards those affected. community is a gift that we receive and we must work hard to respect this gift and continue to be kind towards others. i am glad that notre dame strives to be diverse and accept all people regardless of their appearance, financial status, or cultural background. i believe that hope is something that everyone should encounter. but, many people struggle to find hope because we go through “peaks” and “troughs” every single day (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). the author demonstrates how humans go through ups and downs as we traverse through life. our lives are riddled with many problems that we have to overcome, which decreases our morale and affects our outlook on the world. but that is what makes people so resilient. through the downs and challenges we deal with, eventually we are able to arrive at a “peak” where we feel safe and secure. humans are incomplete and imperfect but these qualities are what make us distinct and different. i know that my future path will be rough, but i am still hopeful that i will achieve my greatest potential where i feel satisfied and proud of what i have accomplished. hope is incredibly important for people to have as it can motivate them to strive for better and be hopeful that the future will bring brighter opportunities. the moreau first year experience has given me a chance to explore different perspectives and ideas about personal growth. the things i have learned and reflected have contributed to my journey towards independence where i can confidently navigate my way through the ups and downs of life. i have encountered many new things during my first semester at notre dame, and i am grateful for the knowledge i have gained. as i become more independent, i hope to mature and develop as my best self where i can be satisfied with what i have accomplished. todd taylor moreau first year experience 29 november 2021 what are some of the most important questions i have asked this semester? one of the important questions i ask myself comes from week 9 of moreau. i often found myself asking the question: “do i really belong or deserve to be at notre dame?”. i have found that there were several occasions where a grade i didn’t like would get me down on myself, and i would feel as if i was the only person on the entire campus who suffered from feeling unworthy of the gift which i had been given, only to learn that this is not true. although i had heard a little about it before, i never fully grasped what “imposter syndrome” was supposed to mean (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth coxmoreau fye week 9). as i watched the video, it dawned on me that a lot of the symptoms which are felt by people who have this, were identical to how i was feeling. truth be told, immediately after i saw the video, i was a little bit taken aback. i thought to myself, “wait a second, i know who i am and what i can do, i don’t feel like an imposter!”. however, the more i thought about it, the more i realized that i had been constantly feeling self depreciation and doubt about my position at this university. as such, i started to take approaches which would help improve my self image and solidify my confidence in my place as one of the fighting irish. what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? one aspect of my life which has decreased in importance as a result of my entrance into notre dame is the weight of external expectations on my life. when i entered notre dame, i felt obligated to do everything because my parents told me to. i got good grades because my parents told me to, i read books because my parents told me to, and i felt like my whole life was just following a manual called “ways to make mom and dad proud”. i learned that while it is good to listen to your elders and those who care about you, you must follow your own path in life (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9). when i let go of the baggage of wanting to please my friends and family, it allowed me to breathe and decide what i wanted to do with my life starting at notre dame. expectations are things which can help motivate a person to reach their highest potential. for example, if a football player has expectations coming from fans for him to win the super bowl, he will be all the more motivated to actually do it. however, expectations can also be a detriment. when we do not meet the expectations of ourselves or others, no matter how unrealistic, it delivers a sense that you have less worth than if you were to meet said goal. this line of thinking is unproductive and harmful, as it assigns a person value based on their accomplishments, and not on their humanity. life should be lived with a combination of work, relationships, relaxation, etc. when one aspect dominates your entire life due to preconceived expectations, it will surely result in misery. so, my thoughts are much more genuine and self building, with what i want for my life at the forefront of my thoughts. what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? one thing, at least to me, which used to be much more black and white in the united states was the prevalence of racism within the country, which i now see as a much more complicated, and serious issue. whenever i was younger, i had always believed that america was the land of equal opportunity, and that no matter the color of your skin or your ethnicity, you could live a happy, healthy, and successful life in the united states, which was a pitifully naive view. now, i know that racism is interwoven into many more institutions than i previously thought, and i now realize that a piece of legislation such as civil rights didn’t do nearly enough to address inequality in our country (“ diversity matters!” agustin fuentes-moreau fye week 11). for example, chicago, which is one of america’s biggest cities, while not legally so, is segregated for all intents and purposes. african americans live in very poor and unsafe conditions, with less access to education than whites. this resulted from a racial prejudice against african americans spanning 400 years, since the colonization of north america. as a result, many african americans have been forced into living in slums, with little to no hope of pursuing higher education or having a family because of the vicious cycle of racial inequality which goes on in the country. i used to believe that equal opportunity was enough, that if you gave blacks and whites the same opportunities to get accepted into colleges, jobs, leadership positions, etc, that everything would go to equilibrium, with an accurate representation of african americans in government and in business. however, this has not been seen, as the systems of oppression which have strangled african americans of their freedom and power are ultimately what keep them from being able to ascend the echelons of power and influence. i now realize that racism is a much more nuanced issue than i thought it was, and that it requires people to analyze their everyday actions, to see if they are doing the right thing in creating a world where blacks can be represented accurately in the world. what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? one thing which was ambiguous, but is now more clear, was my sense of community. from elementary school to high school, i never had many friends, sometimes only having one. i thought that i was just uninteresting, unworthy, or undesirable. as such, i had quite a low opinion of myself, feeling as if i would be alone for the rest of my life, unable to form a connection with anyone which would form a lasting friendship. however, i realized that i shouldn’t have to change how i acted, dressed, ate, or looked to find lifelong friends, i just had to be myself, be kind, and do unto others as i would have done to me. in this way, i found what it means to foster community among others (“thirteen ways of looking at community” parker j. palmer-moreau fye week 11). community is something that cannot only be with those who i like however. additionally, community is something which will have its hardships, which has become clearer to me as i have navigated my social life at notre dame. it is important to remember that it is through trials that we become stronger, and the bonds formed become hardened by times of anger, sadness, or doubt. professor kelly moreau fye 29 november 2021 how to make it worthwhile the great lou holtz, former head coach of notre dame football, once said, “show me someone who has done something worthwhile, and i’ll show you someone who has overcome adversity”. for me, this quote is a great reminder of the struggles that we all have to go through in order to get what we want. when moving into college, everyone goes through a period of change in their lives, and change can be hard. it requires us to step outside of our comfort zone, whether that be living with kids you’ve never met, eating food from a dining hall, more personal freedom, or the multitude of other things that are involved. so, in order to make college worthwhile, you must overcome adversity, and i feel like moreau fye has helped me deal with that adversity and equip me with the tools to respond to it effectively. when most people got their gateway decision, they were either elated or upset. when i got my gateway decision, i was confused. while i had always thought about going to notre dame, i was not expecting to get accepted, so i opened the decision on my phone while in the car, thinking i would be opening a rejection letter. at first, it looked like i was right, as the opening paragraph of the decision letter stated that the school “couldn’t offer me a spot in their 2021 freshman class”. however, when gateway was brought up in the second paragraph, i was more confused than i was excited or angry, so i texted my parents, “i got rejected, but it was a weird rejection”. obviously, it turned out not to be a rejection, but the feeling of “i don’t belong at nd” was an immediate thought of mine since learning about gateway. it’s hard not to feel a sense of imposter syndrome in a situation like this, you’re at a university as prestigious as notre dame, but you also are simultaneously being told that you aren’t quite qualified to be there at the same time. however, when we talked about imposter syndrome in week 9 of this course, my mind went back to that decision letter and the days that followed. as mentioned in the ted talk we watched that week, a lot of people have imposter syndrome, but not many people like to share the doubts that are stuck in their mind (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). however, i think that as a class, we have done a good job being vulnerable with one another and helping each other ease the feelings of imposter syndrome that we have in our heads. this is in large part due to the leadership within our community, which is something that we touched on in week 11 of the course this year. while our class does not have one specific figurehead of leadership (among the students), we all take up a leadership role sometimes without even noticing. by participating in class, whether that be sharing your thoughts with the person next to you, or presenting your conversations that matter project, you are taking a role of leadership within the community. as mentioned in the courage renewal article of week 11, “[communities] requires more leadership, not less, than bureaucracies” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). while there may not be one specific person in our community with as much leadership as there would be in a bureaucracy, there is certainly more leadership in the collective, and i think that’s helped so much in us, as a group, feeling a greater sense of belonging. by being vulnerable with each other, by leaving our comfort zones, and by being leaders in our own unique and individual ways, we are able to help each other overcome imposter syndrome and feel better about taking on all the challenges of college. the idea of being vulnerable with others, while also being a leader, is a balance that is important to find. as i continue on my road at notre dame and after i graduate, i want to strive to perfect this combination within myself, so that i can experience more communities like the one in our class. in order to do this, i need to make sure that i am willing to reach out to people and be outgoing, but more importantly, and more challenging, is letting people reach out to me, and make time for problems others face, not just myself. when approaching challenges in your life, it is important to approach them in the best way possible. while there is often no specific right way to approach a certain situation you encounter in your life, there are certainly a few things that you can do to approach it better. for example, my decision to accept the gateway offer was not a decision that came easy. as aforementioned, the first perspective i looked at gateway from was the perspective of it being a rejection. had i been stubborn, and refused to look at gateway through a new perspective, i would have never accepted the offer. however, because i had an open mind, i reached out to others, and took my own time to learn more about the program. by viewing things from multiple perspectives, i was able to better understand gateway, and thankfully ended up accepting the offer. while we talked a lot about perspectives in week 7 of this course, i was reminded of a similar idea during week 10 as well. in one of our assigned articles, we read about how critical race theory could be analyzed through a catholic lense (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory” by christopher j. devon moreau fye week ten). while this topic might be one that many people try to downplay or avoid, looking at systemic racism through religion may open the eyes of people and lead them to care more deeply about the issues that this country faces. while the end result might be the same as someone who analyzed the situation through, for example, a legal sense, it was the perspective of religion that will have made the difference for others. these new ideas can help fulfill some people’s personal struggles, and give them a whole new way to look at the world. moving forward, i want to start analyzing more issues through religion. despite being a confirmed catholic, my high school years were largely without religion. while i am confident in the way i view things, i think by stepping outside my comfort zone and into a more faith-oriented view, i will gain additional perspectives that will only enhance my knowledge of what’s around me, and what is important to my life. if we are not vulnerable, and unwilling to change our mind or perspective on what we think we already know, we will never be able to find solutions to our problems. one of my favorite quotes all semester came from our week 12 reading, where the text reads, “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we already know” (“hope a holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week 12). i believe that by putting at risk all of our preconceived notions, we are best able to come to greater conclusions that are beyond what we previously believed. if we are too stubborn to hold on to what we already know, then maybe we won’t search for new lenses to view a topic on, and in turn, miss out on some really valuable discoveries.`by looking at issues through religion as i continue my journey through notre dame, i hope to find these valuable discoveries that will enhance my academic experience and world view. overall, i think that these last 4 weeks in moreau have allowed me to come up with some brilliant new ideas, and helped me reflect on some past experiences as well. when i first arrived on campus, i was worried about how i would fit in at both holy cross and at notre dame. i wanted to be able to enjoy my first year as much as i could, while also setting myself up for an enjoyable next three years across the street. at first, the schools and experiences seemed so black and white, however i have begun to notice that you can make the most of both experiences at once by sticking to some of the principles we have talked about in class. have faith in yourself, be a leader, seek understanding through different windows, and take risks. sticking to these four pillars makes it much easier to achieve something worthwhile, and overcome all the adversity in your way. merriam march 2, 2022 sp22-fys-10102-35 moreau first year experience ryan retartha hearts touched while i may only have been on this earth for 18 years, i’ve still managed to experience much of what life has to offer. i’ve visited 22 countries, embracing a variety of cultures and meeting people whose stories are wildly different than mine. i’ve lived overseas several times, as i was forced to assimilate to an foreign environment that eventually became my home. i’ve experience genuine and true love, meeting people who lit a fire of joy inside me and fanned that flame to burn even brighter. i’ve felt loss, whether this be in the death of a close friend, when i’ve let myself down, or something as simple as when i don’t do well on an assignment i worked hard on. this experiences have undoubtedly taught me lessons and have padded my resume of cool conversation starters to break the ice. however, i would never want to be remembered for the things i’ve done or achievements i’ve earned. i would want to be memorialized for the person i was, the people i affected, and the moments we shared together. my life was about the hearts i touched, not the boxes i checked. i would hope my eulogy would go somewhat like this. anna’s life was well-lived, as she brought joy and energy into any room she stepped into. she took time to make sure people felt noticed and seen, dedicating time to get to know someone or going out of her way to show someone they’re appreciated. she was always doing something, running an errand, doing an assignment, helping a friend, or calling her family. however, as written in a quote from pico iyer, it is “the very people… who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). anna was an occupied and driven person, but simultaneously someone who valued small moments of quality time spent with others. she took steps to make others feel loved and that their time was as precious to her as it is. she learned the hard way that getting caught up in the intensity of a moment means you miss out on the important ones, and therefore live a life where you are disconnected and preoccupied. while she was always busy, she made time to be present and thoughtful, spending small moments with others which filled her heart with joy and fulfillment. she was someone who stood up for what was right, advocating for justice and that all men are created equal under the eyes of god. anna stood up against injustices in her community, and protected the rights of those who were discriminated against. anna saw the goodness of an individual and admired those who acted similarly. she was particularly drawn to the legacy left by father hesburgh, a notre dame icon and a man whose catholic values guided him through chaos. father hesburgh lived a well-lived life in his protection of others and advocacy for what is good and catholic. he put “his moral weight behind martin luther king what he was trying to do” ("hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) 49:53 moreau fye week 2). his advocacy for what was right especially in the face of contention and hatred was inspiring to anna. he stuck out as a figure who lived a “well-lived life”, following what the church taugh him about the beauty of a person, even in the midst of hatred and dissent. anna sought to live her life similarly, whether that was simply defending someone who was generally disliked or approaching conversations and confrontations with an open and receptive mind. she valued justice, discourse, and the beauty and inherent goodness of every person, proudly carrying those values with her in every interaction. however, anna was not a person without flaws. she experienced sadness, loss, darkness, and hardship. she sometimes struggled to maintain longlasting happiness, blurring the distinction happiness and joy and consequently leaning into the things that only made her happy. as thoughtfully put by fr. michael himes, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). one of anna’s key and cultivated skills was her ability to distinguish between two emotions, as one is short-lived and temporary. one the other hand, joy is transformative and is necessary to build a passion for a pursuit or a strong relationship with another person. anna was joyful and fervently sought to bring out joy in others. she learned that tapping into joy is the gateway to unlocking one’s passions, and without being passionate, it is impossible to truly live a well-lived life. anna found passion in giving back to others and helping people feel encouraged and capable. she wanted to touch the hearts of others, and in doing so, she felt that same joy reflected back at her. unlocking this passion was crucial, as anna was only successful because she was so thoroughly joyful. in college, she struggled to find a career path and was overcome by anxiety about her future, as she feared she would not find joy in a simple desk job. she had to learn the lesson that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” ("navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). while this quote pertained to her career exploration, it can be broadened to extend to all aspects of anna’s life. there is a strong discrepancy between what is right and wrong, good and evil. however, a fair amount of the time, a decision or path can be “good” because it was good for her. she learned to walk the line between what was selfish and what was beneficial for her. she was firm in what friends she chose, what lifestyle she subscribed to, and what decisions she made that conformed to preserving the truest version of herself. she lived her life authentically and without regret, chasing her passions and deriving success but more importantly joy from them. the people who know anna the best are her family, her lifeline and rock for her whole life. ​​almost no one knows anna in the way that her family does, and her mother’s advice was always something she valued heavily. she is someone who was not only a role model to anna, but who had nothing but her best interests at heart. she saw anna's deepest passion and value in fairness, justice, and service to others. she believes this is what gives her the affinity for teaching, because her career path aligned with her values: equality, education, and the potential of every person. her blind faith in anna motivated her every day, and anna would want her mother to know how large a role and influence she played in her life (moreau fye week 5). anna valued the opinion of others and took careful consideration into what others thought. however, she took pride in her ability to self-reflect, as her self-assured nature was a direct result of time spent with self. this ability to self-reflect took time to master, as there is a hard difference between introspection and self knowledge. as she came to discover, simply thinking about one’s self and situation is wildly different. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). hyperfocus on one’s life can be more detrimental, as introspection can cloud one’s life, impeding positive change and sometimes creating a false sense of security. she learned to walk the line between self-reflection and self-knowledge, creating a healthy space where she could grow in self-knowledge without lulling herself into a false sense of security. this self-reflection allowed anna to be the best version of herself so she could be there for others. she spent careful time in reflection alone so she could be present in conversation, giving the best and most present side of herself to the people she cared about. this allowed her to continue to touch the hearts of those she loved. this love for others was carefully cultivated, as anna was an affectionate person whose love radiated towards everyone she touched. however, she sometimes struggled with feeling that reciprocal love from others. it was like “you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). she struggled to feel love in a way that seemed unconventional to her, because her family life emphasized affection and affirmation on a daily basis. anna felt college was an affirming process for her, because she found friends who genuinely carried her best interests at heart and made her life more well-lived. while they expressed affection nonverbally, she struggled to hear it and feel secure in their relationships. however, she learned how to appreciate their affection and saw the magnitude of their love in everyday actions and little moments. while at first it was hard for her to find that connection, she was able to find life-giving relationships that enhanced her life and made it more well-lived. as time went on, she was able to express and have love expressed back, which was her greatest joy in life. anna found love wherever she looked. she sought it out. she cultivated it in her heart and in the hearts of others. she loved to love others, standing up for justice and taking time to appreciate the nuances of life. she was driven by a need to help others, to love others, to connect and share moments of beauty and pure joy. her memory will last forever because love is infinite and her love and presence will persist. her life was well-lived and lives on forever in the hearts of those she touched. integration 2 moreau encountering challenges: hope, brokenness, and community moreau has been a class that really makes you think about who you are, what you believe, what are you struggling with, what are your strengths and weaknesses, the community you live in, your experiences, your feelings. it is a class that invites you to dig deeper and really start finding little pieces, creating connections with yourself. i can say that i enjoyed so much this class, there were questions that i never thought about asking myself. also, i feel that i got so much advice out from these qqcs and discussions in class. i acquired new tools for my next years in college, and for life. in the last qqcs we talked about how to live according to our own happiness, having hope, living in community, and being able to encounter brokenness. we need to start asking ourselves what we want to do in life, what are our own expectations. we often create these crazy movies and expectations in our minds trying to fulfill others desires, or what we think they want to see from us. we start living a bad dream, and pressure ourselves to an extent that drives us unstable, leading to mental and physical deterioration. something that needs to be normalized is to start caring more about how we feel, and not what others think. it is an extremely challenging task, because we have grown up in a society in which we search for approval, we are always trying to fit in that little box of what is supposed to be success, or the perfect person. we try to please the people around us, specially the people we care about, but this needs to stop. it is time to think and focus on ourselves. it will be a process, but not and impossible one. something that we need to keep in mind is that if the people that surround us really care about us, once we are happy they will support it. at the end of the day, is a matter of having a support system that you know will help you through your roughest times, and will celebrate with you your successes. as mentioned by julia hogan: “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” (julia hogan, grotto text week 9). as well, it is not only to think about what we want in life and what makes us happy, we need to start believing in ourselves and have more confidence that we have the qualities and the capability of being part of great things. we have to acknowledge that we have something special to offer to this world. coming to notre dame has challenged the confidence i have in myself of being good enough or having the right qualities to be part of this great institution filled with brilliant minds. since i got accepted to notre dame, i couldn’t believe it. during the week i received the acceptance letter, my brain couldn’t comprehend what had happened. it was so hard for me to assimilate the situation, and now that i’m here i still don’t fully understand how or why i’m here. there is a little voice in my head asking “how did i got here?”, “what did i do to deserve to be here?”, and many other questions. at the same time, i know i have the capacity and qualities to be here, the thing is that i need to start believing it. i do feel it has gotten better, every day i start growing my confidence little by little. i know i have great things to offer, and i will gain that confidence to be able to transmit and share everything i have to offer. as said in the video: “you have talent, you are capable, and you belong.” (elizabeth cox, ted-ed week 9), and this is something that i need to engrave in my head and start believing it. as well something i have learned and i have being working on is finding community when in search for help, going through tough times, or even to celebrate successes. there are several benefits and things that come with forming part of a community, and it is almost inevitable to not form part of a community. first of all, it is crucial for us as a society to stop judging and stereotyping people, we need to work together to find the common good. our goal should always be to make this world a better place, and to have support systems in which people can rely on. by discriminating, segregating, and creating stereotypes we are just dividing and getting away from opportunities of growth, new relationships, new connections, exposure to new perspectives and new cultures. we become more self aware, more empathetic, more educated, better persons when we are exposed to new things and new people. as said by prof. fuentes: “exposure and access to different point of views and life experiences offers insight and changes biases” (“diversity matters!”, prof. agustin fuentes week 11). also, something important that we need to understand is that we are not self-sufficient, all our success wasn’t done just by ourselves. we need other people to challenge us, support us, criticize, encourage us, be there for us (“thirteen ways of looking at community”, week 11). in my personal experience, during the weeks after fall break it was really hard for me. i got extremely homesick, and was stressed about my career choice and future plans. i received an amazing support from my family, even though the distance, but i also found community here at notre dame, all my friends, my advisor, my ra were people that really supported me and helped go through my tough times. forming part of a community is priceless, being able to have people that care about you and that are willing to help is a privilege. as well, it is nice to know that i can be there for them as well whenever they need me. following the idea of struggling and going through hard times, as i mentioned the weeks after fall break were very challenging for me emotionally. when i did moreau for week 10, i related so much to the topic. the idea that we break sometimes to get back stronger is such a powerful way of thinking, and i couldn’t agree more. sometimes we feel sadness, brokenness, defeat, and they’re not good feelings, but we need to understand that for us to feel this way we need to have experienced how it feels to be happy,, full of life, and this is something we need to be grateful for. being able to feel, is an opportunity to grow, to get to know ourselves, to continue fighting everyday to find our happiness. i felt during those weeks that there was a hole in my heart, something very big was missing, my family, my home, my comfort zone. i do feel that as the weeks passed, i started to feel better, i started talking every day with my whole family, parents and sisters. being in contact with them, calling and texting them was a way for me to feel closer to them. slowly i felt happier and stronger. i’m still not at my 100%, but i do feel so much better. at the end of the day is a matter of perspective, and i have to keep training my mind and heart. there were 2 quotes from moreau week 10 that resonated so much with my situation. the first one from fr. john jenkins: “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia — the prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse. without conviction, there would be no hope.” (wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, fr. john jenkins week 11). in this quote i felt the inspiration to keep fighting, and that everything was going to be alright if i continue having faith in god and in the process. the second quote was from the video: “i want people to know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it is worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand and you get to put back your heart together.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop”, grotto week 10). this quote is so beautiful because it is a reminder that we are not perfect, and that is okay if we break because we can glue the pieces back together and become better versions of ourselves. last, but not least, having hope. having hope and having faith in god is a way of being at peace. we don’t know what is going to happen tomorrow or in the next second, we just need to have hope that everything is going to be okay. being in college is a whole new process, and it can be very overwhelming. the past few weeks, i was very stressed for class registration because i was thinking about changing majors, and deciding some things about my career in the future. things got out of hand, and i was so overwhelmed and worried about the “what is going to happen?”, about the “what if…”. i had to stop and take a break, i was way ahead of myself and trying to control things that were completely out of my reach. one advice both of my parents gave me was to enjoy the process, and to trust the process. have hope that everything is going to turn out the way it is supposed to, it doesn’t matter if it doesn’t look like it right now. i can say with certainty that having hope and faith in the process is a way to be at peace, and i have to remind that to myself every time i feel i can’t control things and that i’m worrying too much about the future. just as fr. james b. kings said: “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next.” (“holy cross and christian education”, fr. james b. kingweek 12). with hope and faith in god, we can live in the present and enjoy it. we need to have trust that even though the obstacles and challenges, good will come. citations julia hogan, grotto text week 9 elizabeth cox, ted-ed week 9 “women find healing through kintsugi workshop”, grotto week 10 wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, fr. john jenkins week 10 “diversity matters!”, prof. agustin fuentes week 11 “thirteen ways of looking at community”, week 11 “holy cross and christian education”, fr. james b. kingweek 12 a letter william peeler a letter i won’t lie, this is not the first time i have begun writing this integration; i believe this draft to be numbered somewhere around five, although that number can vary depending on how you define a draft. this is all to say that i have been struggling to find something worth writing about, and every idea i tried was forced and, in all honesty, half-fabricated. so, in lieu of attempting to face the prompt directly, i believe i should just do my best to explain from where this issue stems. for years before coming to notre dame, i was an active journalist. my room back home has an entire shelf devoted to moleskins filled with half-finished poetry and whatever insights i saw fit to write down, and i found that the easiest way to process and deal with new information or uncertainty was to write about it: often in the form of a poem or letter. ending the summer with a rather painful breakup also ended that habit, as the act of pulling out a moleskin reminded me too much of the dozens of love poems i had written in the past. i promised myself that i would begin journaling again when i felt the need, and to this day, i haven’t. felt the need, i mean. in week nine, you began class by asking everyone what was shocking about their transition to college, and i struggled to come up with a satisfactory answer. in the end, i made something up, an answer which i don’t even remember at the time of writing this. had i been answering truthfully, i would have said ‘nothing,’ but i figured that would make me sound vain and elitist, when in fact that answer is honestly my greatest source of disappointment. it seemed as if that entire week was based around emery bergman’s statement that “going to college is a massive change — so many students are being uprooted from the familiar comforts of their homes and thrust into a completely new place,”1 a statement to which i can’t relate anymore. i was fourteen years old when i moved away from home, and in the span of a single year i was disowned by two friends i had known since birth, thrust into the middle of a family-wide war about who should be blamed for my uncle’s suicide, taken to brazil by someone i had met only a week before, told by that person that i never did and never would deserve happiness, repeatedly flown back and forth from new hampshire to maryland in order to visit my grandfather on his deathbed, and forced to quit the sports i had built my life around due to a career ending injury. believe it or not, that’s the sparknotes version; i didn’t even mention the death threats from a stalker. in the span of a single year, i went from a sheltered kid who could barely hold a conversation to someone who had been exposed to far more than his fair share of the world’s ugliness. suffice to say, i was forced to mature a little quicker than expected. in the span of that year i changed my outlook countless times, devoured the texts of different philosophies and religions, and changed my core beliefs about as often as one changes bedsheets. every week i held a revelation about myself, my values, and the world around me. and so i adapted, and so time passed, and so the world returned to a more normal resting state, and here i am, having just moved into college, surrounded by people in awe of new horizons and in fear of new obstacles, and none of it feels new. i am surrounded by peers who are experiencing daily revelations, the beliefs they have held for their entire lives being tested for the first time, and i find myself struggling to relate anymore. to make something clear, i in no way see this as a form of superiority i simply see myself as desensitized. i know i still have learning left to do, and i understand that i am nowhere near finalized in my beliefs (and i never will be), but it is indisputable fact that the pace of revelations slows with time and experience. 1 (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine) the best way i have ever seen this feeling described is in circle mirror transformation, my favorite show of all time and one i could honestly see being a moreau module in and of itself. in his ending dialogue, schultz, the character never fails to get the short end of the stick, poses the question: “do you ever wonder how many times your life is gonna end? like how many times your life is gonna totally change and then, like, start all over again? and you’ll feel like what happened before wasn’t real and what’s happening now is actually…”2 as he trails off, the play ends, and each member of the audience is left wondering how that sentence ends, because somehow, it rarely feels possible to define right now as ‘real.’ years ago, it felt like my life ended once a week, and while it doesn’t feel any more ‘real’ now, it does have an air of permanence i find unfamiliar. in “thirteen ways of looking at community”, it was stated that “we find it threatening when leaders say, “i am not going tell you how to do this, let alone do it for you, but i am going to create a space in which you can do it for yourselves”3 because the author assumes that functioning without help or guidance is new for the reader. i have actually found the opposite to be true; i have found the level of micromanagement in college courses to be stifling. i have found the constant check-ins, the raising of hands to ask questions, and the constant statements of “this is all new to you, so we’ll walk you through'' almost surreal after living alone for four years and figuring everything out for myself. worse, i understand that i am probably alone in this feeling, as this experience is new for everyone but me, and so i find myself unable to talk about it without coming across as elitist or dismissive; which, i must admit, would be a fair reaction. i am left to wonder if this is “the dryness and dullness” spoken of in the screwtape letters.4 is it this feeling that those around me are finding their callings, their passions, the things 4 (“the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis” moreau fye week twelve) 3 (“thirteen ways of looking at community” moreau fye week eleven) 2 (“circle mirror transformation” by annie baker) that are important to them, and yet here i am feeling as if my worldview hasn’t shifted in years? i have always tended towards a cynical nature -i consider it a result of my heritage, an opinion anyone would understand after a single night at my family dinner table -but there was a point at which my ideas were loose enough that every philosophy was met with at least partial acceptance instead of informed rebuttal. i wonder when that change happened, when my first response to a friend explaining their worldview became comparing it with mine, seeing what parts were the right shape to fit, when i used to just try and accept ideas in their entirety. i am left to wonder how much easier this would feel if, in all of that time, i had found a single system of belief behind which i could throw myself wholeheartedly. i find myself influenced by an odd mix of taoism, buddhism, christianity, and classical philosophy, and a side effect of that idea-stew is that identifying with any individual one feels impossible. when reading about the founders of notre dame and how, from an early age, father moreau “merely wanted to be sent, like the first apostles, to spread faith in jesus christ and his good news wherever he might be most useful,”5 i wondered if i would ever be able to believe in something surely enough to ‘merely’ want something. i could talk about lofty ideals, could quote the wesley theological seminary commencement address and agree that “the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love. this is your calling”6 but while i find some passion in this belief, i know i couldn’t devote my life to that single cause. i find the idea of scientific knowledge important, thus my major in physics, but i don’t think i believe in it strongly enough to devote my life to it either. i can’t think of anything i’m truly sure of, and yet i have met students my age with unshakable faith in god or their purpose and i wonder if that would even 6 (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten) 5 (“holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week twelve) be good for me. after all, i have seen that unshakable faith lead some dorm mates unquestioningly into bigotry and misinformation. still, i can’t help but think it would be comforting to know that there are other people who have devoted their lives the same as mine, to find camaraderie and affirmation. in another life, maybe, but for now, i think mixing pieces and parts of what everyone else has to say is the best way i can express myself. i realize that, by now, we are already well over the word count, and it isn’t my intention to keep you here reading ramblings. while this began as an explanation of my writer's block, it could be said that this letter fits the prompt after all. what have i encountered? apathy, and normalcy. a lack of purpose, direction, and innovation. stagnation: now that’s a good word. isolation, too, and that was the hardest word to add to this list. what will i do? well, maybe i should start writing again. about two paragraphs in i forgot this was an assignment, and actually had to backtrack to add in quotes and requirements. i consider this my first journal entry since august 14th, and hopefully it is the first of many. i don’t think i would have admitted any of this letter’s contents had it not been in a written format. so, to summarize, i would consider this letter an admission of deep seated beliefs and fears, followed by discovery of how, exactly, to face them. one could almost call that a revelation. i used to sign every journal entry, including those written with no audience in mind, because i find it important to address the reader, whoever they may be. that being said, yours, will abigail moore bryan reaume moreau fye october 14, 2021 2 moore might i learn to love in truth during my first months at notre dame and my experiences in the moreau fye course, i have reflected on who i already am, what i’m looking for in my time here, how notre dame can facilitate my search, and how this reflects the prospective telos i’m seeking. on coming to college here i recognize that i bring with me a specific, formed identity. i have been made slow for thoughtful reflection and better-informed action, stalwart for withstanding journeys to destinations beyond my current reach, and curious for seizing adventures when opportunity calls. these traits are a product of my life experience before notre dame, and they inform how i approach adapting to college life. “slow” is derived from my family’s complaints that i am always lagging behind, from spending double the time on my homework in high school than any of my friends, from my eventually diagnosed “neurodevelopmental disorder.” at notre dame this part of my identity has manifested in the registering at the sara bea center and long hours studying alone in my dorm room, but it also offers me a deeper engagement with my new university courses and a careful perspective. i also bring a stubborn, stalwartness most recently exercised along the pacific crest trail. in my first essay for my writing and rhetoric class, a narration of my experience on the trail led me to a more profound understanding of why i uplift and have uplifted resilience. while at notre dame and with the help of this assignment, i have processed how my thru-hike has impacted who i am. in moreau fye specifically, i surprised myself while writing my “where i'm from” poem which caused me to reflect back on the defining themes in my childhood and recognize a pattern of adventure seeking and valuing spontaneity (george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). even reading father sorin’s letter to moreau i noticed how the mindset and values he brought with him to the indiana made what could have been a harsh and dismal situation into an opportunity for hope and learning. i’d like to hope that i might gain some of sorin’s wonder at this place and i’d be honored if what i bring to this institution plays any role in realizing his dream (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842,” fr. sorin, moreau fye – week 5) . building off of who i already am and what i can contribute to notre dame, i am also seeking to develop my person further while learning here. i want to refine an authentic, honest, and individual self and join a community that will cultivate and drive me. i am pursuing “a depth of character” as david brooks discussed in “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” in my education at notre dame (david brooks – moreau fye week 2). any other college that i could have gone to would have challenged and strengthened my mind, but i doubt any of them would have tried to do the same for my heart. i am not so interested in strictly professional success or material wealth, but i am deeply concerned about living a life full of stories—one that will make me emotionally intricate and connected to the truth. it’s harder for me to picture what this looks like but i believe an education that confronts the mind and the heart will build me towards it. this growth that i desire must come from being challenged by my environment and those around me and by consistently engaging my goals and core beliefs with my actions. in order to be impacted by such a community, i have to begin by opening myself up to it. as a quieter member of the social network, this may be the part that need to mature the most. although brené brown’s narrative of her own path to vulnerability kick-started my experience in freshman classes, i have not yet followed her example as i should (“the power of vulnerability,” brené brown – moreau fye week 1). i know i am looking for a community that exalts the deserving, encourages the development of character, and maintains an openness to change, but i don’t quite know how to look. i was talking this week with fr. ollie from my hall, and he mentioned how his closest friends still today are those he made while an undergrad at notre dame. i think part of forging such long-lasting bonds begins with fostering a curiosity for the unique stories that my peers hold to expand my worldview. my sense of adventure, that i mentioned earlier, stems from desiring fuller more complex stories to understand foreign people and places, but i think i fall short of actively pursuing it on the person to person level or in the more monotonous daily life. i would hate to be satisfied with only single stories, like those chimamanda ngozi adichie talks about in “the danger of a single story,” but i know in these first months of college i have not reach out enough to those around me to enrich my perceptions to extent others deserve (chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). life-giving relationships can only be forged by actively acknowledging the human dignity we share and welcoming in each unique possibility of a person. i strongly believe this, but more often then not i keep to myself rather than beginning the such a significant process. although i should be mindful not to end up in the relationships described in “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship,” that mindfulness should not devolve into reservation that blocks me from founding friendships (olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week 4). i cannot hope to achieve the matured heart and eulogy-worthy life if i avoid the relationships so crucial to both. with all these things together, the identity and character i arrived with, my desire to improve that self through the heart, and a search for belonging in a community, i am faced with the question of where they will lead me. it might be alluded to in a quote by fr. daniel berrigan, sj: “’living like the truth is true’” (“student reflections on faith at notre dame,” kyle, moreau fye – week 3). i’m not completely sure, but i hope that my life can come to reflect that. if notre dame can aid me in not only learning to know and articulate the truth but to live it out, i think i will have attained some sliver of wisdom here. even more so, i am aspiring to a condition of the heart and mind that falls continuously in love with the good, the true, and the beautiful and to strive after them in every corner of the earth from a habit made here at notre dame. integration one i believe that i pursue truth by always trying to be my most authentic self. i speak how i feel and i try to make sure people understand how i feel because keeping my feelings inside is not going to help anything. if i want to connect with someone, it is important to not just say the words that that person wants to hear. if they do not appreciate who my true authentic self is, then they probably do not deserve a place in my life. brene brown stated that “when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak. when you ask people about belonging, they’ll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded. and when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). people need to appreciate the good things in life and be honest about them, which can help us all become more of our authentic selves. when you ask someone about something good, such as love, people often respond with stories of all the bad they have experienced. i believe in order for us to connect on a deeper level, there needs to be more of the good stories shared along with the bad ones. we need to share who our true authentic self is. david brooks had a similar argument about appreciating oneself when he said “and most of us including me would say that the eulogy versions are more important than the virtues. but, at least in my case, are they the ones that i think about the most and the answer is no” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that my purpose is to be the best person i can be in this life. that includes being the best friend, coworker, husband, father, or whatever role i may find myself in. it is more important to me that i achieve the eulogy values that people that know me recognize because it means that i have done a good job in life. i believe that i am searching for my purpose in life. i am still too young to know what life has in store for me in the future, but i hope it involves a wife and a family. however, i want to remain open to whatever life throws at me and accept what my purpose in life becomes. college is the perfect time to figure out what is going on in my life because i finally https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be have the freedom that comes with college as well as the responsibility that comes with adulthood. father pete talks about this change by stating “when i was riding with my parents, all roads led to home. when i was driving by myself, everything felt a little unclear” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, moreau fye week three). my parents have been there through even struggle and every victory in my life so far. they have been right at my side giving encouragement and offering advice when needed to push me along to develop into the person i am today. however, now that i am in college, i need to figure these things out for myself and i am looking forward to the challenges that await me. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by trying to meet people who genuinely care about me and enjoy being with me. it is important to surround oneself with caring people as that is what helps shape people. therefore, in order to grow into the person, i want to be, i need to surround myself with good role models and friends that can help develop me into a better person. olivia taylor discusses healthy relationships in her article by stating “if you’re dealing with a friend who’s constantly bailing on you, stop making plans with them and wait for them to make plans with you. if you end up going months without them reaching out to make plans (that they stick to), it’s probably a friendship you don’t want to prioritize anyway” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week 4). if someone cannot take the time to make plans and hang out with me, especially when they have the time and already commit to it, i have learned that those people are not always worth keeping around. i want to surround myself with people that care about me and enjoy being with me so those types of toxic friendships have no spot in my life. i believe that i am made to use my god-given skills to help better the world in whatever way i can. our founder here at notre dame and holy cross “founded holy cross to remind the world that the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason when they’re all engaged” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove, moreau fye week 5). we are all called to use every bit of intellect we have to help progress the world and support others in whatever way we can. in moreau week 6, i referenced all the components of my home life that forged me into the person i am today. i believe that my community should help create who i am, which is why i am so grateful to have grown up in a safe and caring neighborhood. i believe that i grow by learning to accept people of all kinds no matter what. the scientific american discussed this topic by saying “that doesn’t make you a racist, sexist or whatever-ist. it just means your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations” (how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by scientific american, moreau fye week 7). stereotyping is a dangerous thing in today’s society as it has become so much more prevalent. however, it is not our fault that our brains tell us to stereotype because it is only natural. it is our fault, however, if we let that feeling impact the way we really feel about someone or even a group of people. i believe that i can grow by learning to quiet that stereotyping voice in my head and be open to everyone’s opinion. closing out the first semester at the university of notre dame by i believe i have learned much during my time at notre dame so far and hope to reflect on all that has happened to me and all that i have accomplished. looking back on the second half of my first semester at notre dame, i am wondering why i chose to attend notre dame. i feel i have been too focused on others’ reasons as to why they chose notre dame and the admissions office’s reasons as to why they accepted me to attend this school instead of the reasons i chose to come here. i believe this feeling ties back to the imposter syndrome video from week nine and thinking that “others are just as skilled” and should have been admitted over me (“what is the imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine). i have encountered some incredibly smart people so far at notre dame and have thought about my fit in the school. i have tried not to think about school this way, but it is easy to compare yourself to those around you who are succeeding, and you feel as though you are struggling more than those around you. i feel as though these thoughts have influenced my expectations for myself. i am trying to meet my own expectations which are set very high and are “arbitrary and not definite rules for the only way to live life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). this quote from week nine should place me at ease but with the set curriculum for college that i have set for myself, it seems as though there is the one path before me, and i should succeed in order to go on to have a good job and live a good life. i have struggled becoming comfortable at notre dame and i have struggled to pinpoint the reason as to what is stopping me from full heartedly calling notre dame my home. it may be that i am trying to rush into it. i have been asked by my parents many times if i feel that i belong at notre dame. i say i think so, but something is stopping me from saying yes. it could be my set expectations for myself and not meeting them. i believe i have become closer to god during my time at notre dame because i will begin praying when i feel very anxious. i have been praying a lot. this prayer however has helped me place more trust in god’s hands and has let me relax more during my day and i believe overtime i will become more comfortable at notre dame. i believe this thought relates to the commencement speech from week ten which included the quote “i believe your faith can have a transforming effect on the world” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). although i have not focused on bringing out my faith to the world, i believe my world has been transformed through my faith because i am able to have a more relaxed outlook on my life at notre dame. being a college student is a very hard life to adjust to. it has been hard for me to be in a bubble at college and to be in the same area that i go to school in and sleep in. having a roommate and practically no alone time to destress has been tough as well. i feel as though i am in constant stress mode while at notre dame because there is always homework and projects that need to get done. i have also struggled with the food at the dining hall because i have celiac disease so advocating for myself and gluten free food in the special food section of the dining hall has been hard. i feel as though i am firing on all cylinders. i believe my experiences with college life relates to the sentiment from the “thirteen ways of looking at community” article which states that “hard experiences…are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). this sentiment rings true because i have been able to relate to others in my dorm who are struggling with the stress of school and the difficulty of our courses. one specific example is general chemistry 1 and the lab associated with the class. the lab is very long, and i feel as though everyone in the class and lab can bond over the difficulties of messing up and having to struggle through the experiments. i have found community by relating to my classmates on a struggling together level and getting to know them better during those long lab times. i believe i have grown up a lot over these past almost four months. it looks like such a short amount of time, but i have learned so much academically and have grown spiritually. i have learned about my study habits and how to alter them for different classes. i have learned much more about the ancient greek langue from my class this semester than i have in the entire year i took it in my senior year of high school. the academics seem sped up, so i have had to adjust to the speed and believe i have. spiritually, i have been able to attend daily mass on tuesdays and thursdays in the basilica which have been great. i have been able to attend every sunday mass in my dorm which has helped me become closer with those in my dorm who share the same faith beliefs. i have encountered those with drastically different beliefs with my own and have had honest conversations with those people to better understand their beliefs. these conversations have been eye opening and have shown me different perspectives that i have not considered before. when having these conversations, i try my best to be open and honest which can be difficult if someone is questioning what you base your beliefs on. this idea of “questioning beliefs” is not new to me but underutilized until now (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). i believe i am growing in maturity and desire to welcome these sorts of conversations to open myself more to the world around me. in conclusion, i have been dealing with the highs and lows of college life and pondering my place at notre dame. i do believe that i should be at notre dame because there is no better environment for me to grow in my faith life and be challenged academically. going forward, i hope to continue to have eye opening conversations so that i can deepen my beliefs or challenge my outlook on the world. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 capstone integration riley 1 kiara riley professor retartha capstone integration 29 april 2022 my definition of a life well-lived an individual lives a life well-lived if he or she is introspective, maintains trustworthy and meaningful relationships throughout his or her life, and spreads kindness and compassion to others in his or her community. self-reflection is a huge aspect of living a life well-lived, because it allows an individual to discover the true meaning of his or her life. pico iyer elaborates about the importance of introspection: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote resonated with me because it directly aligns with a major aspect of my mission statement. throughout this year as a freshman college student, i have found beauty in quiet moments of reflection, for they allow me to hear and organize my thoughts. reflecting on my regrets and mistakes throughout the year helped me set reasonable goals for myself regarding my academics, relationships, mental attitude, etc. along the same lines, being self-aware and accepting myself through introspection is a major aspect of living life well-lived. i strongly believe that the highest good in life is being true to yourself and accepting who you are as an individual. it is my mission to remind others around me that their differences and unique qualities make them special. when an individual is happy with him or herself, he or she has reached his or her highest good. accepting yourself and others for their individual differences is an essential part of living a life well-lived. another aspect of my definition of a life well-lived is taking time to give back to the world through acts of service and spreading compassion. it is my duty as a catholic and as a riley 2 human being on this earth to serve others in society and interact with others with genuine kindness. a life well-lived includes spreading my faith and optimism in every encounter and conversation. encouraging others to find god in their daily lives is a goal of mine because i know how important my relationship with god is in my life and how much i rely on him every day. i have found strength through prayer during times when i needed advice about how to overcome a personal struggle. it was very difficult being away from my family, especially during the beginning of the year. my relationship and dependency on god strengthened by living on my own. i learned to put all of my worries and anxious thoughts into god’s hands, because he has a plan for me and he knows my purpose. as an undergraduate, i decided to major in political science and i desire to attend law school after i graduate. when selecting my major, i had to make sure to remember that it is not a linear process, but it, instead, is a series of forward and backward steps one has to take to determine his or her genuine passions. i chose political science as my major because it brings me one step closer to living a life well-lived. i desire to use my potential law degree to serve and be the voice of the underprivileged in society. i have been gradually working towards this goal ever since freshman year of high school through volunteering in my hometown, and i am determined to use my future knowledge regarding the law to be the voice for the underrepresented and fight for their rights. i will feel truly successful when my life has been devoted to helping others and giving back to my community. additionally, something unique about my definition of a life well-lived is that it incorporates a particular mindset one should maintain throughout his or her life. this mindset pertains to the importance of growth. when i think about whether or not i am living a life well-lived, i ponder about my emotional growth. i have grown tremendously in my riley 3 ability to manage my emotions without my family being in close proximity. growing is a crucial aspect of one’s life because it allows an individual to feel content and not stagnant. the last aspect of my definition of a life well-lived are meaningful relationships. a meaningful relationship pertains to one where two individuals have unconditional trust between one another. the basis of every relationship is trust, and i, personally, cannot go through life without trusting relationships. i need to have individuals in my life who i can lean on and share personal information with for advice, without worrying that my private information will be spread to other individuals. i am so thankful that i have supportive and loyal family members and friends in my life at all times. along the same lines, a meaningful relationship does not necessarily only pertain to relationships between different individuals. it also pertains to the meaningful relationship an individual has with his or herself. as previously explained, introspection and self-reflection is an essential aspect of living a life well-lived. however, it is important to acknowledge the fact that introspection can sometimes lead to “unproductive and upsetting emotions”. tasha eurich elaborates on this idea in her article: “sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). eurich portrays how introspection may not always lead an individual to more clarity and happiness. this quote from her article resonates with me because when i personally deeply analyze and reflect on my actions and feelings, i almost always become even more anxious than i was prior to reflecting. when eurich explains how overthinking and an excess amount of introspection can cause feelings and emotions that “swamp us” and overwhelm us, she is correct. overthinking and an unhealthy amount of internal self-reflection brings even more anxious thoughts into my mind. i kept this in mind during moments of self-reflection, and i learned to riley 4 trust myself and my feelings by not allowing myself to overthink or over analyze past experiences. i, instead, focussed on how i can improve myself in different aspects of my life in the future. my relationship with myself has become much more meaningful throughout the year; i learned to trust my ability to overcome different challenging situations and personal struggles. over the next three years, i will continue to live a life well-lived by maintaining meaningful relationships with friends and with myself. i will also work hard in my classes so i can achieve my goal of attending law school and, thereafter, work with underprivileged individuals in my community. lastly, i will continue to find the beauty in alone time, and i will continue to pray and strengthen my relationship with god. by doing this, i will, at the best of my ability, bring others around me closer to god. at this point and time in my notre dame journey by while my time at the university of notre dame has been short, i have learned much about myself and my beliefs and others over these past seven weeks. i believe that i am searching for belonging in my social life. before coming to notre dame, i was very excited at having a fresh new start and at the thought of being able to mold myself into the person i want to be. however, i was unsure who that person was that i was striving to be. i also felt a lot of pressure to be a very put together person. like brené brown discussed in her talk, i wanted to feel like i belonged and to have a “sense of…belonging” at notre dame but being surrounded by so many intelligent and talented people was a struggle (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). i would put on this façade of being very organized and in control of what was going which made the transition to being vulnerable and real with my friends more difficult. i feel as though i am breaking down the barrier between that perception i was putting out and being real with those around me. i am trying to form the deeper connections i desire with those around me, and i hope that i will be able to grow in friendship with my friends over these next few weeks and beyond. i believe that i am still trying to find the person i am. i have a strong sense of my values which were strengthened after taking the via character strengths survey (“the via character strengths survey” by via institute on character– moreau fye week two). i know that my faith is at the center of my morals and that i am very reliable. one of my weaknesses was humor. i was more of a care-free person when i was home and before coming to notre dame. i have been very serious about my studies at notre dame, and it has hurt my growth in my social life. i do want to have fun and am still struggling to find that balance. i hope that i will be able to find that balance and develop my weaknesses into strengths. i believe that i am not alone in my journey. i have felt alone at times while at notre dame because i will isolate myself for hours to get all my assignments done. this does not help my social needs. after reading the different perspectives of the notre dame students, i felt comforted by the fact that others with similar values were able to succeed in school while also growing and developing personally. one example is a quote from nyah who wrote that “in [her] lowest moments of loneliness and feelings of inadequacy…” she “leaned on god” (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry – moreau fye week three). doing this much schoolwork and placing a great amount of stress on school can make a person lonely as it has made me. i will now think to turn towards god more because i have relied on him in the past when i have struggled. this realization will hopefully help me relax and take a much-needed breath. i believe that i am beginning to develop life-long friendships. i have been thinking about the “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” article and have been watching the behaviors of those around me. i would notice there were times when i would be talking and the person that i was talking to would not be listening to what i was saying which could be an indicator of a toxic friendship because “they [weren’t] really listen[ing]” to what i had to say (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). this was towards the beginning of our friendship, and we both have developed our listening skills since those conversations. i will keep these warning signs in mind for the future but being able to address these habits early on in our friendship was beneficial to both of us and will be the basis for a lasting friendship. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&t=1s https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ i believe that i grow through educating my mind and soul. this sentiment as explained in father kevin grove’s talk is true to my experience at notre dame (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove, c.s.c. – moreau fye week five). i have been very thorough and diligent with educating my mind through doing my homework while also making connections with my homework to how it pertains in my life. for educating the soul, i have gone to daily mass a few times at the basilica which has been wonderful. i also have been reading a book on st. bernadette who has been my role model for a very long time. one of my goals for the near future is to carve out more time in my day for meditating and thinking about everything that is happening in my life right now. all the work and social interactions and obligations can be overwhelming, but my hope is to create a better balance in my life to grow in both my mind and soul. i believe that by reflecting on my experiences at notre dame i can better learn who i am. while writing the where i’m from poem, i realized that i have many fond memories of my childhood (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six). i was able to look inside myself and find the key moments that have created the person i am today. many of my key moments i mentioned in my poem were about my family and home. my family is very important to me, and i was able to express that in my poem which i read to them. my poem reminded me that i am still the person i was back in colorado. i do not need to change me, but i am able to develop and grow the person i am into a more thoughtful and deeper person. i am a unique individual who brings many talents. my hope for these next few weeks is that i will be able to relax more and be able to look back on many moments freshman year with fondness. i believe that i pursue truth through listening to all stories. each person in the world has their own story and i look for the truth through hearing all sides of an argument. especially after listening to chimamanda ngozi adichie’s talk, i realized how important it is to seek different perspectives and to watch out for the “danger of a single story” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week seven). i have been able to meet so many different types of people so far at notre dame. i have had my perspective of germany and new york changed because i have met students from there and listened to where they were from. i would never have thought that i would meet people from so far away and have so much in common with them. my hope is to continue to meet people with different backgrounds from me so that i can continue to expand my worldly knowledge. all in all, my hopes for these next few weeks are to continue to grow and develop my mind and soul while also finding a balance between the two. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript integration root beliefs i believe that i pursue my truth by being the truest version of myself i believe that i grow by being honest with myself i believe that my purpose is to assure that the sacrifices of my parents do not go in vain i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by giving those around me the opportunity to be heard i believe that i grow by not allowing my failures to determine the future 9:51 i believe that i am searching for the tools and resources to end up in the position i have dreamed of i believe that i am made to refute those who make assumptions on me and my abilities. who is ? my first root belief is that i pursue my truth by being the truest version of myself. when i was younger, it would be safe to describe me as a timid kid. i was also the shortest and smallest in my class, and so i found it difficult to be myself. i wanted to appease those around me, and would allow others' opinions on me to affect how i acted. this is not good for your self-esteem, as you are not allowing yourself to act in your truest form. however as i got older, i got time to do more self-reflection and saw that i had this inner dilemma. brena brown mentions this in her talk. “these folks had the courage to be imperfect. they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). to allow yourself to be imperfect is to be free, and this is the best form of compassion you can show yourself. my second root belief is that i experience the best form of growth when i am honest to myself. the people who know you and your inner dilemmas the best are always going to be you. with this, you can not allow others to determine how you are to grow. this is why i am so strong in this belief , i used to be the one who would allow this outside input to influence my growth. david brooks puts it perfectly when he says, “ you go into yourself, you find the sin which you committed over and again by which the others emerge and you fight that sin and wrestle that sin.. then a depth of character is constructed”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). my third root belief is that my purpose as i understand it, is to ensure that the sacrifices of my parents do not go in vain. in this week’s discussion father pete talked about the beliefs that we find central to our lives( “the role of faith in our story by father pete moreau fye week three). when i thought about what is central to me as a person i kept coming back to the same conclusion, my family and heritage. coming from eritrea, my parents sacrificed everything they had in order to give my brother and i the equality of opportunity. hearing about the struggles of my people back home from a young age, i always knew i was different from my peers. i knew that the thing that made me different was the determination and need to progress my family’s lineage tenfold. my parents always told me that since they did not have much compared to me growing up, i had to do the same for my children. due to this, i felt a lot of pressure early on to succeed in my endeavors. without my purpose, i could not say that i would have the same motivation to push myself in life. my fourth root belief is that i forge life-giving relationships by giving those around me the opportunity to be heard. in our reading from week 4, it talks about the different forms of love that we can show in the relationships we build. “attention is one of the rarest forms of love”(5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). this is the reason i am so confident in the fact that true life-giving relationships have to have great communication. when the other party does not give you their attention it is simply because they do not want to give the effort. in the past, i used to be of the understanding that attention is not correlated with love. however as i have gotten older and especially since college, my time has become more and more limited. if someone makes the time in their day to check in and let you talk about your day or something that has you concerned, it shows they truly care for you and you are not in a temporary relationship. my fifth root belief is that i grow by not allowing my failures to inhibit my success. sometimes, not understanding a concept or not doing well on an exam can feel like the end of the world. especially when you put a copious amount of time and effort into the project. however, as i have gotten older i have found that it is crucial that you do not allow these obstacles to affect your mindset. carla harris talks about this when she says, “failure always brings you a gift, and that gift is called experience”("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week five). when i was younger i remember getting worked up on every mistake that i used to make in school, however i found that this never bettered my performance. it is only when i kept calm and used my failures as a way of learning, that i would succeed. my sixth root belief is that i am searching for the tools and resources to end up in the position i have dreamed of. in our week 6 discussion we talked about where we are from and how this influences what we find important(“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). when i think of this question, i always think about my eritrean heritage. being that i am a first generation us citizen, success was something that i always dreamed of. to be able to give stability and opportunity to my people is and will always be my ultimate aim. in the time i have been at notre dame, i have been given an abundance of resources to further assist my progression in my goal. with the tools and resources that have and will continue to be made available to me during my time at this university, i am confident that i will be able to turn my dreams into reality. my last root belief is that i am made to refute those who make assumptions on me and my abilities. growing up as a black teen in america, i am well aware of the doubts and assumptions that some individuals have on me. keith payne talks about this when discussing the implicit biases that are placed on african americans in society(“how to think about ‘implicit bias” by keith payne moreau fye week seven). a common theme that is found is the pessimistic mindset that people implicitly place on people of color. coming to notre dame, this has only been made more apparent to me. whether it is people asking me for the sport i play for the confused faces i see from visitors when i rock my notre dame apparel, people cannot believe i am here for my academics. however, this will never be a deterrent to my success at this school. i know what i am made to do, and i will do exactly that with a smile on my face. the beginning of change starts now the beginning of change starts now after doing some thinking and self-reflection, i’ve come up with what i feel best represents my root beliefs. i believe that i grow by staying true to myself and my values and not letting other people dictate those things for me. i believe that i am made to make other people feel good. i believe that i pursue truth by never judging others too quickly and always listening to what people have to say. these three ideals make up my root beliefs and accurately define who i am as a person. as for my first root belief of growing by staying true to myself and my values and not letting other people dictate things for me, i think that this one was especially important to me because it emphasizes a way that i can become a better person. in the past and even still today, i’ve struggled with identifying who i am as a person, or rather, who i portray myself to be to others. this is due to a few factors, like being more of an introvert and always wanting to please others. i said it best in my week one qqc where i wrote, “as an introverted person, i find myself often conforming to whatever values or beliefs my peers have simply because i feel it will make them more comfortable with me and so that my own beliefs won’t conflict with others.” i always find myself saying what others want to hear in order to make them happy, and i’ve realized that doing so makes it feel like i’m not even my own person, i’m just a combination of the values and beliefs of people that i meet. in order to grow, i need to rediscover myself and focus on what i believe and value in life, because doing so will make me my own person. obviously this comes with a balance, as i don’t want to only rely on myself. this reminds me of what brené brown discussed when she said “you know who you are when you call your friends and say “i think i need to see somebody, do you have any recommendations.”” (“the power of vulnerability” brené brown, moreau fye week one) it’s important for me to be comfortable relying on my friends a little bit, because in the past, i have been known to only rely on myself and kept that “i’ll do it myself” mentality. overall, i need to define my personal values and hold on to them, while still being open to listen to what others believe in as well. it won’t be an easy transition, but i feel that it will be worth my time overall. as father pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery.” (“the role of faith in our story” father pete mccormick, moreau fye week three) by going on this journey and discovering myself, i feel that i will not only benefit myself but others around me as well, as i hope that people i engage with will want to hear my beliefs and values and not just their own. i’m excited to start this growth and begin on my journey, though i know it will be quite an adjustment for me. i remember father sorin’s words, “oh! may this new eden be ever the home of innocence and virtue!” (“sorin letter to moreau” father sorin, moreau fye week 5) father sorin’s words remind me of the hope that i need to have on my journey, something that will keep me going when things get rough. with this in mind, i know i will accomplish my goals. my second root belief, which is my belief that i am made to make other people feel good, is another one that is very important to me. i feel that i have a gift for making other people laugh and i always try to use it. no matter how well i know someone, i always try and throw in some humor into a conversation to put them in a good mood. for me, humor tends to be the way i show people i love them. if i make someone laugh or put a smile on their face, i feel like i’ve accomplished something and helped them. this is somewhat like what was discussed in https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view week four about life-giving friendships. “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week four) i agree with taylor in this, as i always strive to keep people in a good mood when talking to them no matter what they’re going through. at the same time, i realize when people are trying to talk to me about something serious and i know when not to use humor as well. i believe that most of my friends know they can always count on me for a laugh, or just as someone to give them advice and be there for them. however, incorporating humor sometimes makes me dodge problems by thinking about something else that makes me laugh. it reminds me of what david brooks said. “we live in a culture with an adam 1 mentality where we’re inarticulate about adam 2.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” david brooks, moreau fye week two) being humorous isn’t necessarily an adam 1 mentality, but when i use it to suppress the internal issues i see through my adam 2 side, it becomes a problem. i hope to work on this in order to find a good balance of using humor in my life to benefit myself and my peers. and now, my third root belief that i pursue truth by never judging others too quickly and always listening to what people have to say. ever since i was young, i was never one to be judgmental or unfair to others. as it says in my poem, “i am from cracked asphalt, the stains from basketballs and skateboards, still there to this day.” (“where i’m from poem” mark hennin, moreau fye week 6) growing up playing games outside in my neighborhood, i was quick to learn that arguments were commonplace. often i would be the one to mediate an argument between two friends during a game and that’s really where i learned how to be fair, thoughtful, and to always listen to both sides of a discussion. this ties in with what chimamanda ngozi adichie discussed when she said “i would like to end with this thought: that when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.” (“the danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie, moreau fye week 7) a single story always has bias to it, whether it’s conscious bias or not. realizing that there are multiple perspectives and angles to the same situations is something that i’m glad to have known for a while, and understanding those perspectives is something that i hope to continue to grow at. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xrt1vdb1ixxvgxxexsnd4sinr7pkqcyl3eb75conppm/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare brian integration 2 professor anthony polotto moreau first year experience 01 december 2021 beautiful encounters with nasty beginnings before i even fathomed it, assignments began to pile up. what used to be the two-hour breaks became more like two minutes. every inch of my schedule became occupied by the rising number of responsibilities, assignments, and tasks. i became very much confused and bewildered. how was i to use my time wisely so that i could give an equal portion to both school and my social life? this was a struggle, and as a freshman in university, maintaining this struggle became an utmost priority. time management was my first encounter. an encounter which brought forth tension within me. unlike high school, college provided a limitless freedom. the freedom to make decisions, the freedom to do what i want, and the freedom to live the life you want to live. however, utilizing the time accompanying my freedom became a daunting task. allocating my time wisely to each aspect in my life became very important, because without it, success in college was not a guarantee. “…expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine).” due to my struggle with time management, i decided to set myself achievable expectations. setting myself expectations were not the most ideal however because it eventually placed stress onto me. this additional stress further led me to use my time in an unconventional manner. nevertheless, my persistent trials eventually helped me identify the best course of action in how to use my time. moving to a completely new state for university uncovered several mixed feelings within me. as a person who had a history with mild asthma, moving to a state with a colder environment was quite intimidating. as the cold weather approached, the number of layers increased. staying warm became an encounter, as the cold weather was something that i did not enjoy. nevertheless, two weeks into november, i became very sick. the coughing increased, my tiredness skyrocketed, and overall, my health was not in a good place. through uhs, i got tested and all my results turned out to be negative. i decided to take some over the counter medications, but even then, my symptoms were not decreasing but rather remained stagnant. throughout this period of sickness, i also became very homesick. the thought of being sick and being far from home made me especially miss my parents more. at university, all my struggles, particularly being sick, was a personal fight. this encounter taught me a lot on how to be an adult. “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto – moreau fye week ten).” being ill in an entirely new atmosphere broke my heart, primarily due to the separation from my parents. the realization of being all alone in your personal struggles hit very differently, as no one understood the struggle of being sick in a different environment. but, from this experience of brokenness, i also learned to expand and adapt to new struggles. the endeavor to feel better helped me become an adult. visiting the doctor through telehealth all by myself and picking up my prescribed medications helped me become the adult i am meant to be. engaging with myself and growing from the pain aided my success in overturning a bad encounter. making friends was a confusing and difficult challenge. entering college, my mindset was to discover the meaningful relationships that would be fulfilling in a mutual way. in the first weeks of the semester, i often found myself sitting by myself, attempting to make friends. despite this, i eventually managed to find an amazing friend group who accepted me and loved me for who i was. being a part of this friend group is truly a blessing, especially since i managed to make a close group of friends in my first semester of college. as a group, we spend so much time together, and we all attempt to get to know each other in a personal and dear way. my friend group is very diverse, both in educational interests as well as our physical differences. despite our differences, our mutual appreciation for each other is what makes our friendship especially strong. “‘race’ as we use the term and classification is not a reflection of biological groups (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven).” the evident differences of race and skin color is not based upon biological principles but rather due to environmental and clinal variations. when evaluating friendships, race, and acceptance of a single group of people should not be the primary factor. rather, embracing every individual for who they are is the appropriate way to make and appreciate a friend. personally, my friend group is rich in diversity, but it is not our diversity and variation that makes us friends. our mutual love and level of understanding is what unites us in a strong bond of companionship. my worst encounter this semester was a course in my schedule. calculus a was a struggle. it was a tough class to decipher and understand. as a student that came from high school with only pre-calculus as the foundation, calculus a brought the absolute worst in me. starting from the beginning of the semester, i was very proficient in the quizzes and first midterm. however, following the first midterm, the material became very dense for me to comprehend. the number of hours i spent studying increased, but it still resulted with mediocre results. my scores were absolutely disheartening, and i even left one of my midterm exams crying – knowing that i failed the test. “if you had watched your patient carefully you would have seen this undulation in every department of his life – his interest in work, his affection for his friends, his physical appetites, all go up and down (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve).” my bad results in calculus a really impacted me in a different way. i started to compare my scores with others, which further led me to even questioning my intelligence. i became very unmotivated to do better in calculus since all my repeated efforts were not procuring any good results. despite this downfall, i decided to push forward and overcome my trials and tests. calculus a really pushed all my buttons, but it also helped me realize which study methods work best for me in math. i also was able to understand more about myself and how i respond to different levels of stress. my first semester was filled with beautiful moments of encounters. while these encounters all began in unusual and non-ideal ways, i managed to learn a lot about myself and how i either succumb or grow from pressure. the encounters i experienced greatly helped me build my realistic first semester of college. i am very grateful for these meaningful experiences. integration one maria finan moreau first year experience october 11th, 2021 changing lives for the better i believe that my purpose is to connect people and lead people in the right direction when they are down. i am someone who is very outgoing, and usually likes to think positively about other people, and try to lead them in the direction they need to go, but i am also someone who beats myself up over my mistakes, which is one thing that i need to work on for myself. but, this is why i lean on my strengths and try to be the natural leader that i am. especially on the soccer field, my leadership instincts take over, and even as a freshman i have become a voice on the men’s club soccer team here at the university of notre dame just because i feel that someone always needs to fill that void, and connect people by bringing them forwards. in brené brown’s ted talk, she says “connection is why we’re here, it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). sometimes people have trouble breaking out of their shells, and it can take time and a good leader and role model in order to do so. everyone needs connection in their lives, and being a leader can make that possible. i believe that my community should prioritize eulogy virtues even though it may not be our first thought. especially in the united states, there really is no true way for most people to prioritize resume virtues, in which this applies more to how much money they will make, their future jobs, and grades. but, what does this cost? this costs a constant competition between people, and even though it can be healthy it can also be toxic in other occasions, and also just https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 people focused on fending and being successful for themselves. in david brooks’ ted talk, he says “and most of us, including me, would say the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues. but, at least in my case are they the ones that i think about the most? and the answer is no” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). even though i say as a community that we should change our virtues, that also includes myself, as i am someone who needs to focus on building it. a lot of the time, i care most about my performance, whether it is grades in the classroom or wins on the soccer field, and i need to change myself for the better in order to even start a community in doing so. i believe that i am responsible for those who aren’t as fortunate and lucky as me. coming to the university of notre dame, i am someone who was very fortunate to grow up in a good school system, have a good system of support and have a good mindset to work hard for myself. some people may not be so lucky. some come from unfortunate neighborhoods where they don’t think about applying to a school like notre dame, a poor family life, and school systems that don’t prepare them for escaping their homes and becoming more involved throughout society. thus, i think with being fortunate comes responsibility for those who aren’t. father pete talked about how we won the lottery in life, and that we need to do something with it and do good in the world, and also how importance it is to have some sort of foundation in faith (“the role of faith in our story” by fr pete mccormick moreau fye week three). i think faith is what pushes us forward, and i have faith that i was put here to do something with everything that i have, and not just use it for myself. throughout society, there are too many people that sit at the top 1% and keep everything for themselves, and morally i think we have an obligation to help those who are not as fortunate. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry i believe in the importance of healthy relationships because of the way it can benefit both you and the other person. some people go through mental health issues their whole lives solely because of the people around them. without a good support system around you, some people may be driven over the edge and go on a downward spiral because of those individuals, and sometimes all a person needs is a hard shove towards the right people in the right direction. in the “that's not love” video, it demonstrates how many people’s lives feel it’s just a “rough patch”, when they are constantly arguing, doing things behind each other's backs, and yes there may be love there but it isn’t right to let it just happen naturally, as it is okay to ask for help in counselling or something similar (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four). alongside the negatives of not having healthy relationships, there are positives to having them. you are able to help one another when you need someone, and just both genuinely enjoy each other’s company and doing things together, rather than a toxic one where usually at least one person is genuinely unhappy at times. i believe that there needs to be more goodness in this world. at my high school, there was a saying that we would “pursue goodness as well as knowledge”. i was taught to help and do good wherever i was needed, and to help others in need. in the notre dame laetare medalist address, carla ann harris, the recipient of the award, talks about how she was a “proud product of catholic schools” where she was taught to do anything to help people whenever you can (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla ann harris moreau fye week five). this was one of the things that attracted me to notre dame, because above learning is being a good person, just like the high school that i came from. i believe that everyone has a background worth sharing, and this can bring good into the world. when writing the “where i’m from” poem, i thought about how everyone’s background https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 and poems were completely different from mine. especially on a college campus, everyone comes from completely different backgrounds, cultures, religions, and it is rare to find someone just from the same town as you. in george ella lyon’s article, she says “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). this demonstrates how we always have room to share different perspectives in our lives. in my opinion, the best way to improve, whether it be in the workplace, a sports field, or just in the real world is having different perspectives, and this is one way we can do it. i believe that there is always room for improvement within people. one of the biggest problems within the world today is there constantly being stereotypes and judging people by their appearance. i truly believe that when you realize how wrong you can be about someone, it changes your perspective entirely. as chimamanda ngozi adiche says “so that is how to create a single story, show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adiche moreau fye week seven). i think in order to solve this problem we really need to steer away from social media as a society, as this is where most of this comes from, and there are always ways to change our minds. at first, my perspective of my soccer coach was very flawed, as i just saw someone with tattoos all over his body, but this man ended up being one of if not the most influential person in my life. needless to say, people can always improve and change their perspectives. even when times seem down, there is always light within this world. whether you need help, or your realize someone around you does, there is always a way to help, and change this world for the better. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration one: ryan retartha moreau fye 15 october 2021 “make sure you pray before you go to bed” i came to college knowing that i would face many situations where i would have to choose between my firm beliefs or the pressure of “living it up” as a freshman in college. i know who i am and what i stand for, yet i still found myself challenged here. i truly believe that everyone has their own belief system based on the way that they grew up, but college is also a place for that system to be either fostered, or slowly dismantled. personally, i believe that my purpose in life is to demonstrate love and use any advantages i obtain to assist underprivileged communities. as a minority myself, i have experienced the beauty in the compassion of others to help my family, especially when we were struggling while i was younger. a lot of the challenges, like my parents separating and constantly moving between extended family member’s homes, that came with my childhood led me towards my empathetic nature because i had to learn to become understanding. however, in week 4 we discussed the characteristics of toxic nature within relationships that helped me to realize that there were many of those within the relationships with my parents because of the trauma. i was specifically able to resonate with the satirical video that embodied various negative aspects of the relationships i hold, which would force me to feel guilty or responsible for things i was unable to control (“because i love you” by one love foundation moreau fye week 4). this held firm to my belief that i need to carefully search for life-giving relationships in order to help those in need, but to also protect my psychological and emotional well-being. my upbringing was not a common one and i loved the outlet that the poem provided for expressing what aspects of my childhood feel most essential to me (“where i’m from” by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html george ella lyon moreau fye week six). my birthplace affected the way i grew up because of the immense diversity of people. that allowed me to value it so much and added further to my empathetic character. my challenges as a kid left me feeling unseen. i wanted someone there for me to feel what i did, but there was no one. i believe that is why i am so willing to step in and be guided by empathy because it is essential for change. i know that i wouldn’t want my childhood for anyone else, but i am so thankful for it because it formed me into the person i am today, and i think i am pretty proud of her. additionally, i believe that i grow most by being vulnerable and using introspection to reflect on what i need to work on. at notre dame, i have already had to do this a lot as i navigated friend groups and where i felt i belonged. i am not afraid to be vulnerable and i am quite frequently known as an oversharer because i am not afraid to show my insecurities and struggles, especially now as a freshman. the first video we watched for moreau spoke to me immensely because of the impact it had on the views i already had about the importance of self-vulnerability and being vulnerable with those around us (“the power of vulnerability” by bréne brown moreau fye week one). i found myself being very vulnerable with people shortly after meeting them here at notre dame. it seemed like i needed to be vulnerable to connect with people beyond the boring questions, “what’s your major?” and “what dorm are you in,” even though as a gateway student, i had to become even more vulnerable while explaining that i lived at holy cross and wasn’t full time at notre dame. my desire for vulnerability has allowed me to mature in many ways emotionally, especially as i have faced many situations where i am asked for advice on boys or what to do about feeling homesick. i know that i have so much to learn and grow through as a person, especially because i am only 18. however, i am very fortunate to have some maturity as a result of being open to vulnerability and the importance that it carries in a well-lived life. i know that at notre dame i will continue to face situations where i need to be vulnerable and i am completely open to it because i believe that it is necessary in order to live a fulfilling life; we don’t always need to be strong and assertive of what goes on around us and vulnerability fosters that. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be furthermore, i believe that i am responsible for my own success through the way i deal with challenges in life. i have been extremely challenged at notre dame as i navigate the rigor of academics and the difficulty of maintaining friendships past welcome weekend. i learned to think openly and to realize that i will not always succeed and i will not always excel academically. this reminds me of the ted talk that spoke of the detrimental effects of a stubborn mind. one needs to be open to new concepts, ideas, and people in order to fully flourish as a human (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). one thing i took away from the fifth week of moreau was that i surely want carla harris to speak at my commencement in 2025. she spoke so eloquently of the value found within learning from failures and disparities, especially when she highlighted the importance of getting back up after failing( 2021 laetare medalist address by carla harris moreau fye week five). i only see myself truly succeeding in life by acknowledging that there is always room for growth, but there is also no pressure to be exceptional 100% of the time. my success doesn’t depend on the evaluations that i receive, but it does depend on the effort and work that i put on. i need to find value in my work ethic and effort because that is what leads to success. fall once and get back up seven times. finally, i believe that it is important for people to have a firm belief system that guides their actions and lifestyle. i have seen and met so many people from different backgrounds that have allowed me to see the value in knowing what one holds as truth. i personally know that my faith is integral to the way that i live my life, but also to the way that i view my life. in class, i knew that one of my highest ranking strengths would be spirituality or faith because i wear it so proudly. however, i appreciated that it showed me areas that i wasn’t so strong in and one that stood out to me was curiosity (via character strengths survey by via adult survey moreau fye week two). i know that i am not a very adventurous or curious person because i can be considered a control freak based on the way that i like to plan. in other words, i can't do spontaneity. my faith is a guiding principle in life, but in the area of https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup curiosity it has steered me away from venturing out of the fear that i will mess up. however, i have learned that my faith isn’t a hindrance, rather, it is a way for me to write my unique story for others to read and see the beauty in the love of christ. my faith has undoubtedly been challenged at notre dame because nobody is forcing me to do anything. however, father pete’s inspirational video made me reflect on the way that i viewed my faith because it is special to each individual. it can be fostered or explored in different ways anywhere, but especially at notre dame. i have explored mine here by joining an amazing community of faith-fueled individuals in iron sharpens iron and i wouldn’t want to be anywhere else on thursdays and sundays when we all go to church together. i am thankful for the various opportunities i have been given at notre dame to grow in my faith, including the grotto or the feed your faith event in the first couple of weeks. yet, i found that there is always something else that i can be doing to grow in my faith and it reminds me of a conversation i had with my parents in my dorm and them telling me, “make sure you pray before you go to bed.” the importance of connection and growth the importance of connection and growth i believe that i am made to connect with my fellow humans. i come from a place where connections are very important. in hawaii there is a very strong sense of community. i think that this has helped me to quickly become a part of notre dame. the “where i am from” ("where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) poem by george ella lyon helped me to understand this unique advantage. in hawaii the overarching sense of community is known colloquially as aloha. this sense of community has taught me the value in human connections and how important they are to thriving in new places. i think that my ability to share my gifts and feelings has been a great boon during my short stay here. i realized this during our first week’s lecture about being vulnerable. as bernet brown said “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging.”( “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i believe that hawaii has instilled me with the confidence and sense of belonging to ask for help and be open when i need to. i think that ability to be open and vulnerable has helped me to be more understanding and outgoing. i found that being open about myself has helped me to form real connections with people i now view as close friends. additionally i believe that the reading “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship”("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four) from the grotto actually helped me shift my perspective on the way i treat others. while i understand that this was intended to show how important identifying and rectifying issues with others is, i was able to reflect on what i do that could be a red flag in a relationship with friends. i believe that my purpose is to understand. i have had the privilege of experiencing a wide range of cultures. each of these cultures has shared a part of themselves with me. learning about all of these cultures often comes from making friends who are members of these cultures. one of the big realisations of having friends from a multitude of backgrounds is that there is nothing particularly different other than a few traditions. as david brooks from the new york times says “this emotional and moral knowledge should give us a sense of identity, a sense of ideals to live up to and an appreciation of the values that matter most to us — equality or prosperity or freedom.” (how to destroy truth by david brooks, ny times moreau fye week seven) while they have specific cultural identities they follow they are largely the same as me. at our core we share similar values for life and human dignity. the realisation that across people groups core values have great similarities has helped me to want to understand more about other cultures. i have always had a great respect and curiosity about other cultures. growing up in hawaii my first best friend was from a hongwanji mission. in my early life race and religion never came into my mind when i was deciding who to be friends with. i think that this was a crucial part of my development and how i do my best to understand others. when i moved to boston i was exposed to a new set of cultures. however, because of the understanding of other cultures i built up as a child in hawaii, finding common ground and learning about the cultures. i believe that my purpose is to understand so that i may help build human connections between people and cultures to help form a more global community. i believe that i can grow by developing my faith. these portions of our class have shown me where my shortcomings are. those shortcomings are particularly in the area of faith. in the character strengths survey (via character strengths survey by via adult survey moreau fye week two) characteristics relative to faith were among my weakest ones. my relationship with http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104976 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/104976 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105032 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup faith is not very consistent. unfortunately there was no close accessible church near me in maui. i think the moreau first year experience is equipping me to develop my faith on campus. the discussion of resources where students could develop their faith was informative. the activity where we went to visit places where my faith could be developed. the “how was your faith life developed or changed in your time at nd?” questions from campus ministry ("student reflections on faith" by campus ministry moreau fye week three) helped me to understand how students in similar situations began to develop their faith at notre dame. the fact that i have these experiences to help guide me as i begin to explore more about the faith traditions i have lost connection with is a great inspiration for me. in addition my rector has become a similar inspiration in providing connections through which i can explore my faith. by being open and honest with him about my desire to explore the faith possibilities at notre dame. i think that by developing my faith here at notre dame i can perpetuate father sorin’s aim to make notre dame “one of the most powerful means for doing good in this country.” (fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842 moreau fye week five) this aim resonates with with me. i hope to leave notre dame and have an active role in improving the world in which we live. spreading a sense of community and making an effort to help people in need and to improve the global standard of living are things that are very important to me. i feel that by utilizing all aspects of my notre dame education and by using notre dame to become more in touch with my faith i can become that force for change that i wish to see spread out into the community. i hope that going forward moreau can continue to show me resources to utilize in order to make the most of my experience here. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view week 13-integration 2 pozzi 1 megan leis moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 not a goodbye, but rather a see you later as leaves fall off the trees and the weather turns to a blustery cold, mother nature serves as a reminder that the first semester of freshman year is drawing to a close. it seems that it was just yesterday when i received my college acceptance letter and first set foot on campus. as winter break draws near, it is a time for reflection on the experiences encountered throughout the semester to feel grounded and prepared for the rest of my college experience at the university of notre dame. most do not know about competitive gymnastics and how it forms and, arguably, deforms the human spirit. at age 17 months, i entered my first gymnastics class and 12 years later escalated to competitive state championships and podium finishes till early high school. gymnastics was my life at the expense of school sports, robotics, debate teams, dances, and friday nights; it taught me incredible courage, fearlessness, and adorned me with very thick skin. everyday, year round, my body performed 4-5 hours of strength, conditioning, bone pounding flips, multiplied by 14 years all the while balancing an advanced course load. the goal is not to have the fastest time nor score in the net. the goal is to not make an error. i am perfect when i march out onto the mat prior to the floor routine, or when i place my hand on the beam. every leg extension, every hand flick, every toe point was under scrutinization. failures are measured, not minutes, goals nor points, and my job was to overcome. i owe a lot of who i am to competitive gymnastics: my work ethic, attention to detail, dare-devil can-do attitude would not pozzi 2 exist without the countless hours i spent in the gymnasium. but, there are many things i wish that i didn’t learn: body un-positivity, and perfectionism; you could never work hard enough. leaving the competitive gymnastics world was a shock to the system. i still felt everyone was scrutinizing my every move, whether it be about homework assignments or how many times i raised my hand in class. as i struggled to keep up with my own and outside expectations, i began to wonder if “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). little by little, i am learning to do things for myself rather than for others. i am proud of the true grit i honed from gymnastics and bring this fortitude and courage to all aspects of my life at notre dame knowing that it is the ability to push through fear, rather than perfection, that defines success instead of feeling stressed if my classmates understand the chemistry homework more easily than me, i spend time in office hours and review sessions working through problems until i feel comfortable with the material. i send myself to bed at a more reasonable time to prioritize my mental and physical health rather than nit-picking over spanish essays, knowing sleep will be more valuable to me than any grade. coming back from break, i plan on joining notre dame’s gymnastics club, hoping to rebuild a more positive relationship with the sport and restore my joy for gymnastics. “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests”(“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve). like christ, we should spend our life caring for not only ourselves, but others as well, around the globe. we must have hope of a better tomorrow, and to https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192206/download?download_frd=1 pozzi 3 do so, we must help our neighbors during difficult times the same way we would want to be helped during similar times of struggle. although contradictory, during the most difficult times of struggle and sadness, we have the most hope. coming to notre dame, i was out of my depth. the covid-19 pandemic left me out of the classroom and isolated in my home for over a year and a half. i was not expecting such a drastic change so quickly. after studying for a semester abroad in high school, i thought that i would be prepared to live and study independently. with barely a moment to breathe after welcome weekend, i was thrown into classes, trying to navigate making new friends for the first time in years and collegiate level academics outside the comfort of my own home. i did not feel like i belonged in the group of friends i was trying to make; rather than feeling comforted i felt more isolated than ever. everyday, i wondered if i would fit in better at another school, closer to home, closer to friends i already knew i loved and at a school with academics that did not make me question my place every time i stepped into a classroom. yet, as the semester progressed i realized that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“13 ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). trying to make friends with people that you feel you are supposed to be can be just as draining for others as it is for yourself. it can cause strife and dissonance within a group, and could result in unintentional offense or lashing out. it is important to “relax” into communities, to find the people you truly belong with rather than the ones you assume you do. i became close with people in my dorm after spending time in the same common rooms and classmates that i sat next to and asked questions when confused in chemistry. i found my closest friends when least expected, and the least forced. now, we study together in the same common room every evening after classes conclude, to work on homework together, or laugh about the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ pozzi 4 day's events. after a tough day, i have no doubt about the people and places i can return to, and that fills me with hope that everything will be alright. just as i would like to receive support from my friends, i would like to lend support to them, too. “‘gaudium et spes’ encourages catholics to engage the human and social sciences as they strive to promote human dignity and justice in society” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten). as dr. martin luther king jr. once said, “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.” as a white woman, i understand and recognize my privilege, and i try my best to not take it for granted. i feel incredibly grateful for all the opportunities that i have received in life, like going to such an amazing institution like notre dame. yet, not every experience at notre dame has been a positive one. in theology class, i faced questions and unwarranted comparisons about my untraditional faith. while walking to north dining hall, a male classmate expressed he felt that his future wife would be saddled with the sole responsibility of cleaning and cooking in their home. i found myself having to explain why when walking back to my dorm from the library at night i walk behind the dome rather than cut directly through god quad because there is much better lighting. however, i also have never encountered a more supportive community than i have on campus. students go out of their way to check in with others to make sure they are feeling ok during class and football games. if someone needs help with anything, no less than three people offer solutions, anywhere from lending a pencil to offering a ride home. it is extremely important to both recognize and understand the diverse experiences of students at notre dame to be able to better support our community members. everyone deserves the chance to pursue every opportunity they wish, and when something prohibits that from happening through threats and discrimination of human rights, that cannot be left unchecked. although https://www.vatican.va/archive/hist_councils/ii_vatican_council/documents/vat-ii_const_19651207_gaudium-et-spes_en.html https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 pozzi 5 change is sometimes hard, it is necessary, especially when it involves the welfare of our fellow community members. through open dialogue, i hope that we can make notre dame a community that is safe and welcoming for every viewpoint, religion, political affiliation, and personal experience. although i have just begun my notre dame journey, i am excited where my experiences will lead me as i foster new life-long friendships, unforgettable memories, and an emotional and academic understanding of the irish community. by reflecting on my first semester experiences, i hope to not only continue promoting self-growth but also contribute to the notre dame community in a positive way with exponential effects on the fighting irish and beyond. away from home: a collection of lessons away from home: a collection of lessons 1. i believe that vulnerability can help me to develop a sense of belonging and connection to the ones around me. by watching dr. brown’s video on vulnerability (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), i was able to realize how being more open regarding our experiences to others may lead to the development of great friendships. one of my favorite reflections from her is centered around our need to allow ourselves to be imperfect in order to develop a strong sense of love and belonging, something i talked about in my first week assignment. for example, i recently shared with a few colleagues how i was feeling about moving and starting school in a different country. at first, i was really worried about showing my “weaknesses” to them, since i did not know how they would respond. however, after finally being able to do so, i noticed how that helped me to connect with them: although they were not international students, they were able to relate to the experience of being away from your parents. then, they also felt prompted to share how they felt about that, and that conversation helped us to find common ground and understand we were not alone. 2. i believe that searching for self-knowledge can help me develop my strengths and improve my weaknesses. during moreau’s week 2 assignment, i completed the via character strengths survey. (via character strengths survey moreau fye week two). this survey helped me to not only get a grasp of my most outstanding strengths, such as creativity and love of learning, but also gave me a better understanding of what i can improve from now on. since the past year, i have been looking for ways to develop my self-knowledge. be it going to therapy or journaling, i try to constantly learn about myself by investigating the motivations behind my behavior and actions. for example, if i haven’t been feeling comfortable with being in a specific environment, i feel prompted to reflect about what aspects in it make me uncomfortable, and if there is any way for me to solve this issue. 3. i believe that i can build my spirituality even without being religious. for years, i believed being agnostic meant i should not try to develop myself spiritually. however, i noticed that spirituality does not have to be necessarily tied to religion: it goes beyond that. being a spiritually invested person means that you recognize that there’s something greater than what you are able to physically see, be that an entity or simply the universe. for example, after watching fr. pete talk about the role of faith in our lives (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three), i noticed that being hopeful is one of the key aspects of our spiritual lives. nurturing this feeling does not require us to have a religion at all: it is mainly about trusting that everything happens for a reason and expecting positive outcomes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois 4. i believe that i can forge life-giving relationships by communicating my expectations and boundaries to the ones around me. since last year, i have been learning about non-violent communication and how it can help us to develop healthy and mutual relationships. one of the key aspects of it is to communicate what we expect out of friendships, because people may anticipate different things from them. additionally, making your boundaries clear to others is extremely important. in “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four), i was able to notice a few examples of actions that may show a disregard for someone’s boundaries and expectations, which are relevant aspects to know in order to develop and maintain healthy relationships. 5. i believe that trying to find common ground with others is an effective way to connect with them. during her speech at notre dame’s 2021 commencement ceremony, in which she received the laetare medal, carla harris started making her point with a personal story ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5). additionally, fr. groove (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin groove, c.s.c moreau fye week 5.) started one of his speeches the same way: telling a story. that made me reflect about how important talking about our stories and life experiences is to build and create relationships. additionally, i have learned from personal experiences a possible reason for that: when we talk about ourselves, people may identify with one or more of the points we mention maybe they were born in the same neighborhood, or shared a similar high school experience. therefore, making sure you are able to insert your life narrative into interactions with other people and finding common ground may be an effective way to connect with them. 6. i believe that staying connected to the place i am from gives me strength and energy to face new challenges. for moreau’s week six, we were assigned a poem to write based on a poem by george ella lyon (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). in this poem, i noticed how i did not only talk a lot about myself, but also wrote about my family and my hometown, and how i missed both of them. writing about this topic was initially difficult for me, since it reminded me of how much i miss my relatives and the place where i was born. however, it also helped me to give me strength: i remembered why i am here, and how this experience and the opportunities it is providing me will be beneficial for me and my loved ones. 7. i believe that actively trying to avoid implicit bias is a behavior fundamental to my growth. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html "the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story" i chose this quote from chimamanda ngozi adichie ("the danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) to be my quote of moreau’s seventh week because of how powerful i believe it is. the key problem with stereotypes is that they lead us to generalizations, which can be extremely dangerous, especially if those stereotypes are negative or project unrealistic expectations on the targeted group. after discussing in my moreau class how to avoid implicit bias, i was able to learn about simple yet useful ways to do so. one of them had a lot to do with trying to surround ourselves with diverse perspectives, ranging from diverging opinions on political matters to opposite socioeconomic backgrounds. 8. conclusion my first weeks at notre dame were definitely challenging academically and socially. however, i noticed that i have been not only able to learn from the new experiences i am having here, but i am also getting to apply a few skills and coping mechanisms i learned at home to deal with complex situations. overall, my experience at notre dame has been extremely positive, and i believe that i am being able to grow both academically and personally through the resources i am being offered. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story intigration 1 oswald moreau 10/15/2021 integration one growth within new experiences the start of college has been a rollercoaster so far. there have been many mixed emotions such as excitement, stress, homesickness, nervousness, pride, and acceptance. in my first year experience in moreau class, we learned and talked about many different topics about this whole new college experience. it has allowed me to learn and talk about things that i wouldn't normally talk about out loud. some of these topics include transitioning to a new life in college, building relationships, managing stress, and learning how others are going through the same new experiences, and it is okay to ask for help when needed. i believe that i grow by making friendshsips, and learning from my past. all throughout high school, as i look back on it, one of the first things that comes to mind is my closest friends. i believe that the reason why these friends come to mind when i think about my past high school experiences is because they have created such a big impact on me and they have influenced me to become the person i am today. this may sound a bit corny, but i genuinely don't know where i would be today if i didn't have those friends by my side for the past few years. the relationships you build are important because they are what get you through a tough day, or when you need anything from a good laugh to a shoulder to cry on, or simply just for company. in moreau week 7, adichie says “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity.” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau week 7). this highlights how we never know someones true story and where they come from so it is important to be considerate towards others. in moreau week 3, the video we watched from father pete included the quote “all of you know a thing or two about stepping out of your comfort zones you've left family and friends to form new relationships.” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick-moreau week 3) this quote is especially relatable because everyone has stepped out of their comfort zone by leaving home and coming here to notre dame. for me this was difficult because i grew up and have only ever lived in long island my entire life, and living on an island makes your relationships with people even closer, because everyone knows everyone. this made it extra difficult to leave and form new relationships here at notre dame. i believe that i forge life giving relationships by understanding others and being there for people. as these past few weeks moved into, and adjusting to this new college life, every individual has had their own personal experiences with it. not everyone may have had the smoothest start to beginning their classes or learning their way around campus, or making friends. important to understand that all people are different and going through their own things that we don't know about. therefore, it is important to always be kind towards others, and make friends, because at the end of the day, everyone is trying to meet new people and for relationships, so introducing yourself to someone and asking how their day is going can be a positive turn around for someone. on the other hand, it is also important to be able to identify toxic relationships as well. not all relationships are going to be healthy ones. in week 4 of moreau, we spoke about relationships. in one of the articles we read, it said “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people.” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week 4). this quote proves that you should find relationships that help you become a better person rather than put you down all the time. relationships should be a two way street, meaning that you want the best for the other person, but they also want the best for you. it is important to look out for your close friends. i believe that i pursue my truth by identifying my self worth. knowing your strengths and weaknesses are very beneficial, because you learn the kind of person you are. it is also beneficial because it makes it easier to meet new people and form bonds with others. in our moreau week 2 we spoke about knowing our self-knowledge. this includes how we see things from our own personal perspective and how we interact to become successful. in the video, brookes states “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value. and the tricky thing, i'd say, about these two sides of our nature is they work by different logics.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau week 2). this quote allows us to think to ourselves by questioning what we seek in our lives. do we strive for success and innovation, or do we strive for humility and love? our strengths and weaknesses influence our success. another way in which i pursue my own truth is by knowing where i come from. in moreau week 6, we wrote a poem about where we come from. this poem is in a repetitive “i am from” format where you describe things, places, people, or influences from your past that have influenced your morals today. (“where i’m from” by ella lyon -moreau week 6). this poem helps me realize how close of a connection i have with the place and the people i grew up with who have made me the woman i am today. some of the people i mentioned in my poem have motivated and encouraged me to succeed and without them i wouldn't be where i am today. i believe that i am made to find who i am meant to be and create a future for myself that i enjoy. finding a sense of belonging can take more time for some people than others. being confident in ourselves is the key to knowing who you want to be. this quote from week 1 of moreau, “the most important, is to believe that we're enough. because when we work from a place that says, "i'm enough," then we stop screaming, and we start listening. we're kinder and gentler to the people around us, and we're kinder and gentler to ourselves.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). this quote stood out to me because it reminds us that once we find our own self belonging, then we can begin to encourage others that they are enough as well. in week 5 of moreau this quote stood out to me “faith and reason together place us always in relationship to each other.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grovemoreau week 5). this illustrates how the framework for your own personal experiences is already there for you, you just need to take the time to find who you are and who you want to be. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 microsoft word moreau integration two assignment dr. vanessa chan moreau first year experience: integration two assignment november 26, 2021 “encountering community… and myself?!?!” in my integration one assignment, i began by stating that i felt that i had experienced some of the most powerful and meaningful personal growth of my entire life during my first eight weeks at notre dame. i have encountered so much, as i reflect on the first thirteen weeks of my notre dame career, i feel that i can say with complete confidence that they have been some of the best, yet simultaneously some of the most difficult and stressful, thirteen weeks of my life. thus, far i have encountered true brotherhood and sisterhood, as well as the truest me. it might seem odd to encounter myself, but i was able to fully encounter myself because of the truly amazing people that i have been surrounded with. while there are many ways that i will respond, i will certainly embrace everything that i encounter, both the joys and the challenges, and learn from every experience that i have. before coming here, i thought that having a good experience was “black and white,” and that i either had fun or i didn’t. through encountering true brotherhood and sisterhood, as well as my authentic self, i have realized that sometimes a suboptimal experience is exactly what i need. in my integration one assignment, i wrote that i was searching for meaningful relationships and happy memories. by responding to what i encounter with full immersion of myself, i believe that i can reach these goals and more! residence halls are always used as examples of community, but i do not think i can do justice to the word, at least in the context of the notre dame community, without starting off by discussing them. when i arrived early for rotc, most of the freshman were not here yet, so i was a little scared uncertain when i moved in. it wasn’t even an hour, though, before a sophomore stopped by to introduce himself and give me his phone number just so that i had it in case i needed anything. this has continued, as another sophomore helped me coordinate my train back here after thanksgiving and even scheduled an uber for us, relieving a lot of stress for me. it has not been uncommon for me to have conversations at 3 a.m. with friends in my section about random, but nonetheless meaningful, happenings in our lives. in addition, i feel that some of the best parts of my residence hall are the diversity that is natural and celebrated. my section alone is very diverse, and i have grown by learning from my friends in my section, and i think that this is because many of us have embraced the diversity of cultures and experiences. i genuinely want to hear the stories of others, and i have been able to encounter them by following the quote from week 11 that resonates the most with me, which reads, “the story of race has many voices. understanding it begins with listening” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race – moreau fye week eleven). in class this week, i remember that not only residence halls came up as examples of where we see community, but the entire university. i have encountered something bigger than myself that i genuinely feel a part of, and this is a brotherhood and sisterhood of great individuals, and i intend to respond by listening to the stories of others and continuing to fully immerse myself in all of notre dame, including the people and experiences. however, any healthy community encounters some dissonance, which we defined in class as disconnect of values or absence of perfect harmony between others. i have encountered dissonance with others and have learned that the authentic me does not like conflict, but also will not shy away from it. i have had evening hanging out with people who were simply disinterested in me, even though i was interested in them and their stories. i have also had many stressed nights over schoolwork or social events where i felt that i should be excited like everyone else but was just worried instead. however, navy ball and calculus test #3, both of which were stressors, ended up going well. they weren’t perfect, but i realized that both strengthened by bond with members of the notre dame community and taught me to be open and optimistic. emery bergmann in her video gave the advice to “open you mind and take experiences as they come,” and i could not agree more (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week 9). i will continue to respond to encounters with dissonance in community with an open mind that hopes for the best and looks at the lessons that can be learned. navy ball and calculus test #3 not only went well but allowed me to grow and taught me valuable lessons. brothers and sisters really do look out for each other, and i have encountered and been a part of that at notre dame. i have also encountered the “truest me” here at notre dame because of the culture and people that i am surrounded by. to find this, though, i had to experience a certain amount of brokenness. in the first weeks of college, i learned that i could not have everything under control and instead decided i really liked living fast and “on the fly,” not really being too concerned. i still like to live fast, but not so fast that i feel tired, drained, or simply out of touch with what i am really looking for. going to bed earlier and using a planner cleaned up some subtle feelings of brokenness, but i really have found that the truest me is the one who greets and is greeted by everyone the know, who is as involved as possible, as who strives to know everyone. i like the little pleasant pieces of the day, like catching up with someone i only see once a week or enjoying a sporadic meal at north dining hall, since i typically eat at south. however, this doesn’t always happen, and sometimes i find myself feeling “outside” or not perfectly thriving. however, just as kirsten helgeson says in her kintsugi class, my struggles and experiences make me the “beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that [i] am today” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson – moreau fye week ten). realizing this self-confidence is what truly makes me happy, and both the support and occasional undermining of classmates are to credit. however, while i feel happy at notre dame now, i have encountered the reality that the authentic me worries about the future, both in the next couple of years at notre dame and in the longer future. however, i am comforted by our discussions in week 12 about hope for the future and living with optimism. from our reading, the notion that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges” is one that really resonated with me (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 12). any challenges that i face will make me stronger and likely provide me with fulfillment, and i will respond to them by being my true self. the challenges of calculus this semester, as well as adjusting to a new (amazing) social environment, have done just that! people often told me that living away at college would be one of the best and more important experiences of my life, and i could not agree more. i have encountered so much in the past thirteen weeks that has sometimes made me happy, sometimes stressed me out, sometimes made me excited, and sometimes just made me laugh. the true community at notre dame, as well as my authentic self that i have discovered, have each allowed me to not only grow and change, but also anticipate the great things that are in store in the future. integration #3 riley 1 kiara riley moreau first year experience professor retartha 4 march 2022 the final chapter of my life how do i define a “life well-lived?” this question specifically resonated with me because it allowed me to analyze my current position in life and ponder about what has brought me both happiness and sadness throughout the years. i realized that one aspect of my life that has brought me extreme happiness is taking time to meditate and reflect on my lifestyle choices, relationships and feelings. taking time to think about how i feel and why i feel that way really helped me genuinely manage my emotions as a teenager and as an adult. as pico iyer explains in his article, alone and peaceful time enables individuals to remove themselves from reality and come to terms with their deep and vulnerable emotions and feelings. living a life well-lived means taking time out of the day to contact these deep emotions and being aware of them. iyer states, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). iyer discusses that “being still” through this reflection process also allows us to comprehend the broader meaning of our lives. this concept of “being still” is really important to me and is a large aspect of my definition for a life well-lived. although self-reflection has definitely helped me through difficult situations growing up, i always have to remember that intense self-reflection does have its dangers as well. as tasha eurich explains, “sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp and impede positive action” (“the right way to be introspective: yes there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). eurich discusses how self-reflection may not always lead to happiness and more clarity. overthinking can bring thoughts and emotions that riley 2 can cause one to feel overwhelmed and confused. this inevitably happened to me multiple times as a teenager. as i grew older, however, i learned how to avoid this from happening by making sure that i do not overanalyze my decisions and feelings. another huge aspect of my definition of a “live well-lived” is service and helping others. my life has been well-lived because i have devoted a majority of it to helping others and giving back to the world. as stated in the hesburgh film, “... we all have a duty to serve and give back” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i completely agree with this statement because i strongly believe that we all have a “duty” and responsibility to give back and lend a hand to others in every way we possibly can. years ago, i chose my undergraduate major and career because of this strong belief. i majored in political science and pursued a very successful career in law. i used my law degree to serve and represent individuals who face inequalities. i knew, even in college, that i wanted to be the voice of the underrepresented and work with communities of individuals who are less fortunate than myself. what would be observable signs that i lived a life well-lived? this question is quite easy to answer. an observable sign that i lived a life well-lived is that i chose a career that challenges and brings me out of my comfort zone. as father michael himes explains, one should “look for the task that will continue to stretch you” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). i successfully chose a career that allows me to both serve others and, at the same time, grow and expand my knowledge. growth, in my opinion, is essential for a life well-lived, and it is, therefore, a large aspect of my definition for a life well-lived. along the same lines, balance is another key component for a life well-lived. growth and balance can coexist and one of my life goals was to find a balance between my career/academics and personal life. i am proud to say that i did successfully manage to meet this goal. during this riley 3 process, however, of determining and solidifying my career, it was important to be aware of the fact that it takes time to come to a final decision. as it states in “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” , “it’s not a one-step process” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” moreau fye week four). the process of selecting a career is not a “one-step process”. it is, instead, a series of forward and backward steps an individual takes in order to determine what he or she is truly interested in and passionate about. one should never rush when deciding what he or she wants to pursue as an adult. this process is not linear and one should seek others for help when needed as well, like i did. another observable sign that i lived a life well-lived is that i have healthy relationships with my family and friends. having healthy relationships is an important aspect of my life and i am so thankful that i do currently have strong relationships with each of my family members and all of my friends. my relationship with my mom, specifically, is very special to me. she knows me better than any individual and knows exactly what i need to hear when i need advice. i asked her once, “what do you think i value and desire in life? why?” she quickly responded by explaining that i value trust more than anything (my mom moreau fye week five). this answer is very accurate because i strongly believe that honesty, being genuine, and trust is the basis of every relationship one can have in his or her life. whether the relationship is platonic or romantic, trust and honesty is what makes relationships meaningful and real. i always remembered this when i was put into environments where i had to make friends and establish relationships with others because i knew it would guarantee meaningful relationships in the end. relationships are what keeps me going and what have kept me going throughout my entire life. as pope francis says, “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by riley 4 his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). pope francis is accurate in that our relationships with other human beings is what makes life important, valuable and worth living. i would not be here today without my family members and friends who have helped me overcome some serious personal struggles and challenges. as i lay here and enter into the last chapter of my life, i reflect on all of these aspects of my life journey that made my life very well-lived. self-reflection, being patient, serving and helping others, and maintaining healthy relationships is what made my life well-lived. i desire to be remembered as a girl who put others before herself and as someone who unconditionally loved and supported her family members and friends. as i motionlessly lay on this bed surrounded by family members and friends, i can safely say that i definitely lived a life well-lived. understanding my mission statement by this was my first stab at the mission statement: all my interactions, experiences, and everything i do will be done to become a better version of myself. with this view, the world will become my library, helping me gain a better understanding of myself. with this understanding i will realize my purpose in life. then, everything i do will be done to master whatever my purpose will be, and i will become better at my craft. it’s terrible, unclear, and choppy. it beats around the bush. i know what i am trying to say, but i did not say it. it worries me that others will not understand who i am, so i’ll take another stab at this mission statement and better articulate my thoughts. i modeled my mission statement from a kobe bryant quote i love. he said, “once you know what it is in life that you want to do, then the world basically becomes your library. everything you view, you can view from that perspective, which makes everything a learning asset for you,” – kobe bryant kobe knew that he wanted to be a basketball player when he was eight years old. me, well i’m sophomore in college with an undecided major, and to be honest, i’m not even trying to choose one because right now; i don’t feel ready to give the right answer. i may not have the same sense of purpose as kobe did, but i am still motivated. every day is uniquely similar. there are reoccurring themes, similar problems i try to solve, and familiar situations i find myself in. each time i come across these familiar instances, i try to understand and solve them, almost as if life is one big game and i’m trying to beat a level in it. right now, i am motivated and focused on beating a level. it’s going to sound weird, but a big thing i focus on each day is my posture. i constantly find myself uncomfortable in my body. it is something that bothers me immensely. most of the time when i am sitting in class, i am not listening to my teachers. instead, i am focusing on how i can sit better. i try to keep my back straight, shoulders rolled back, engage my leg muscles, and focus on keeping my feet connected to the ground. i find myself trying to make these corrections everywhere. whether i am eating in the dining hall, at my desk doing homework, or lying-in bed watching youtube, my mind is constantly on my body. i think about sitting upright while i ride my bike to moreau on tuesday’s morning, applying what i believe to be the correct amount of pressure to my feet when i walk, and the dexterity in my fingers while i write with a pencil. i’m obsessed with trying to feel in control of my body. i became so obsessed with my body after, last year, i learned about a term called mindfulness. mindfulness is the basic human ability to fully present, aware of where we are and what we are doing, and not overwhelmed by what is going on around us. to be mindful, which is a trait i value and find very important, i need to be in control of my body. when i am thinking about my body as i’m sitting at my desk, riding my bike, or writing, i’m becoming overwhelmed by what is going on around me, and thus i can’t be mindful. i strongly feel a need to be mindful in every moment of my life. after i discovered mindfulness, i was intrigued and did some more research. i learned that being mindful leads to the flow state. the flow state is a state of being so immersed in whatever you are doing that you achieve a sense of ecstasy, a sense of clarity, and you know exactly what you are doing from one moment to another. this type of clarity is very important, and i believe it is a necessary tool to achieve understanding. understanding is just the first part of a chain of events for me. when i understand something, and it clicks, i gain confidence. when i am confident, like anyone else, i am able to perform to the best of my ability; regardless of whether “my best” is good enough, feeling like i am giving everything i possibly can in the activities i do is when i can take pride in myself. the “activities i do” are just as broad as i make it out to be. i believe in giving 100% effort in everything, no matter what. i do not listen or care to hear any reasons that i should not give 100% effort. i have never played water polo before, but if i do, i will never acknowledge that fact and let it exempt me from any embarrassment i may find myself in when i inevitably make mistakes the first time i play. i will put as much thought into a rather small homework assignment as i would a ten-page essay. if i can, i will always go out of my way to help a friend or family member with whatever they ask of me. i even try to carry out simple chores like cleaning the garage, stacking wood, or taking out the trash what i believe to be “the right way”. the right way for me just isn’t the wrong the way. i know the wrong way when i feel it; i get lazy. it’s the times i choose to leave a wrapper on the ground i clearly saw i dropped, the times i actively avoid proofreading my papers, and any other moment where i know i can do better, but i choose not to. to me, there’s no reason not to approach life with this kind of mindfulness and attention. if you try hard enough, and really look closely, you can find value in almost anything. that is why i love kobe’s quote so much. again, it reads, “once you know what it is in life that you want to do, then the world basically becomes your library. everything you view, you can view from that perspective, which makes everything a learning asset for you,” – kobe bryant after riding this out, i feel like i have a better understanding of my mission statement, and i feel confident enough to take another stab at it: i want to be present in every moment, and i want to use this clarity to conquer the obsession i have with being in control of my body and all my future obsessions. i never want to stop being obsessed. i always want to find ways that i learn to become a better person, for myself and others. and finally, i want to approach everything i do, no matter what, with a high level of attention and a standard of excellence. i believe when i view the world from this perspective, everything will be a learning asset for myself, and the world will become my library. walsh final integration mary grace walsh fys 10102-115 professor pruitt april 29, 2022 mission statement and reflection my mission is to love. first, to love god in the catholic faith, devoting time and energy to loving god in the trinity and pouring out his love to those around me. the cross and the resurrection are my models for life: loving to the point of ultimate sacrifice and living in the hope and joy of the resurrection. the catholic faith brings meaning and texture to her life. second, my mission is to love those around me, especially the poor and vulnerable who need more than ever to experience the love of the father and the compassionate, fierce love of jesus christ. filled with the holy spirit, i am called to overflow with extraordinary love for others. defending the dignity of human life, i am committed to a whole life ethic and showing all the dignity that is inherent to them simply by being a human person. while life has its ups and downs, life has intrinsic meaning and is inherently good. lastly, i am called to love myself. while this can seem to be prideful to some, i must love myself in order to love other people well. i will take care of myself and fill my cup in order to help fill the cup of others. doing this will look different, but it can include intentionally spending time with those who love me, taking care of my mental health with therapy and medication, spending time in prayer, and finding joy however i can. “even mere existence is extraordinary enough to be exciting,” says gk chesterton, and this is the truth which i live by. finding joy, loving others, admiring the ordinary, and seeking truth are my goals, and these will i pursue until i die (personal mission statement draft by mary grace walsh, moreau fye week 13). writing my mission statement was an interesting task, and one that helped me to finetune some of my beliefs and figure out what i am supposed to be doing on this earth. when i was a junior in high school, my english teacher had a meaning of life unit, which i went back to a little bit for this assignment. i found it interesting to compare my final unit paper to the mission https://docs.google.com/document/u/1/d/1zpd--xt6skgd-wf4si3tlditbszwormtpsn-qkmbztg/edit statement i came up with 2.5 years later and after a global pandemic. i have grown and changed a lot since then, but it was cool to see that they were remarkably similar. first, i would like to reflect on the part of my mission statement about faith and loving god. as a catholic, i recognize that i am called to love the triune god first and foremost, above all other things, and from this, my love for myself and others spills over. i need to slow down in order to do this, especially during the business of college. if i do not slow down and spend time with god, i will be less prepared to love others (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico iyer, moreau fye week 1). this calls for an intentional balancing of time, working hard on time management but also giving myself time to take a break and pause for a moment, whether that is watching a show or spending time with god (“5 minutes,” aria swarr, moreau fye week 6). extraordinary people have a lot to teach me about how to do this well, so a lot of the time i will look to others to find my way, while also realizing that i am called to my own unique way of life, which doesn’t have to fit the common ideal of success (“hesburgh,” quote from mary berry, moreau fye week 2). second, i said that i am called to love others. this is possibly the most important part of my mission statement to enact in a practical way. i was struck by our reading for week 10, where jacob walsh talked about the reaction his friend had to him coming out. this was beautiful and helped me understand how i should always put truth and compassion on the same level, never putting one before the other but seeing them side by side (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, moreau fye week 10). we are called to come not just as servants but as neighbors for our friends and those who we do not know, loving them, serving them, but most importantly walking with them (constitution of the congregation of holy cross, moreau fye week 12). it is important as well that we let our opinion of other people be shaped not by what we hear about them but what we learn from them and our interactions with them. this was evident when we learned about echo chambers (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). when we have true compassion for others and recognize their full human dignity, it is clear that we love them, even when words are not used (“chapter 8: jurisdiction,” from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle, moreau fye week 7, on canvas). lastly, i am called to love myself and create a life i love living. this takes so many different forms, but it is important to do if i want to accomplish any of the other things i have set out to do. one way i can do this is to really investigate how i want to live my life and what i want an integrated life to look like. while this class sometimes put forward materials i didn’t love, the career stuff was very helpful, especially through the lens of discernment (“three key questions,” father michael himes, moreau fye week 3). taking the career center survey helped me understand that i might not have one continuous career, and that’s okay (meruelo career center, moreau fye week 4). speaking with my cousin emma helped me realize that even though i might not know exactly what i want to do with my life, if i know who i am and act in confidence following who i am called to be, i can’t fail (conversation with my cousin emma, moreau fye week 5). while this can sometimes be difficult because of struggles with mental health, when i truly accompany myself in my own suffering and show compassion to myself, i always feel better (“teaching accompaniment” by professor steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). writing my own eulogy (which ended up being more of an obituary, i got a little bit confused) helped me to realize that i do know who i am, and with that i can’t fail in life (integration, moreau fye week 8). finding joy, loving, and seeking truth are the main goals of my life. i can do this wherever i am, whatever my circumstances are, and i consider that a win. i truly do love living this life, with all of its ups and downs. i am lucky to be alive and am grateful for the gift of this world and the life i get to live on it. moreau integration 10/15/21 erik oswald moreau first year experience obtaining meaning from classroom reflections i believe that my purpose is to love. i think that that is every person’s purpose, whether they believe it or not. it’s easy for us to get sucked up in our monotonous work or school lives and think that our purpose is to finish the next assignment or to meet the next deadline. however, i believe that it is important to look above our everyday lives and focus on the thing that ties all of our actions together love! in week two of moreau class, we took a survey that told us about our strengths and weaknesses, and my number one strength was love (character strengths survey week 2 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup). this made sense to me. when i mentioned that to my discussion partner, he asked why i thought it made sense. i replied that it was because i thought that love was the foundation of all human connection. so, my purpose is to love. it is to love my family, my friends, my boyfriend, my dog, and every other thing i encounter in my life. i have noticed that when i focus on loving and appreciating the beautiful world around me, i am happier with all aspects of my life, because i can recognize where i am blessed. i intend to do this more in the future. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable. in week one of moreau class, we watched brené brown’s ted talk that discussed the psychological power of vulnerability (ted talk brené brown week 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wb m-kd0&index=3). i agree with what dr. brown says in this ted talk because i know that in my experiences, what she said held true vulnerability leads to human connection. when i want to deepen my relationships with other people, i know that i need to discuss tougher topics with them. one way this has happened recently is when two of my brother’s best friends passed away, and i talked about it with my roommate. it turned out that one of her brother's best friends had passed away a week before, so we were able to talk to each other and create a deeper relationship where we are able to be more open about harder things, simply because we could relate when i was vulnerable. similarly, in week four of moreau class, we read information about what is a healthy relationship (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” the red flag campaign week 4 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing ). i plan on using the information that i learned from this article in the future to inform how i interact with people in my life to form healthy relationships. i believe that i am responsible for growing. in week three of moreau class, we read multiple students’ viewpoints on their faith and how it impacted their time at notre dame (“student reflections on faith” campus ministry week 3 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view). this made https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view me reflect on my time at my catholic dominican high school. i went into that school as a pretty religious person because my parents had raised me in the church. however, my theology classes forced me to look deeper into my belief system. specifically, there was one class period where the lecture was on the problem of suffering. this made me question my belief system and eventually led me to realize that i don’t identify with the religious ideas that i was raised on. this realization feels like growth to me, because i knew myself further and actually thought about what i believed in, rather than just listening to other people tell me what is right. this sort of growth inspired me to question the status quo and grow in ways that i deem important and healthy. i plan on doing this in the future by thinking for myself and applying lessons from moreau class. i believe that my community should follow the principles it was founded on. in week five of moreau class, we read what moreau himself wrote: “the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart” (moreau letter week 5 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view). this is basically moreau saying that while it is very important to learn as much as possible and to expand our knowledge, in doing so we cannot forget to also grow in our capacity to love and respect other people and things. i agree with this sentiment because it emphasizes the importance of our humanity in our studies. eventually, i want to use my degree that i earn at notre dame in order to do good and help other people. this involves bettering my heart and soul as well as my mind. for example, it is often easy for me to get lost in all the reading i have to do for my philosophy class rather than focusing on how the different philosophies might apply to my life and my future. once i realized that i was doing this, i started to act more intentionally with my assignments, and i plan on continuing that trend as i continue to study here at college, and i believe that the rest of the notre dame community should, and will, do the same. i believe that where i am from is essential to who i am. in week six of moreau class, we wrote poems about where we are from, based on an example by george ella lyon (“where i am from” george ella lyon, week 6 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html). in my version of this poem, i talked about my neighborhood that i grew up in with my family. it was, and still is, one of my favorite places on earth. i had a lovely childhood there which sometimes makes it hard to be far from home, but i also know that it is time for me to move onto the next chapter of my life, which is why the second stanza of my poem was about where i have come. the experiences from my childhood shaped who i am and how i interact with the world around me today, and i think it is important to recognize that. it is also important to note that there are a lot of things i mentioned in that poem, like my neighbors and my family and others. however, knowing about all of these things doesn’t mean that someone knows me in totality. this reminded me of an activity from class in week seven of moreau class, we watched chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk on the danger of a single story, which connected https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html because she discussed the fact that knowing one thing about a person doesn’t mean you know everything about that person (“danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie, week 7 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story). this really resonated with me after writing that poem assignment because i realized that it was impossible to encompass my entire background in a poem. with this connection to my assignments and real life, i plan to apply that thinking to everyone i meet, reminding myself that knowing one thing about someone is not the same as actually knowing them. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story cox 1 professor pruitt moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 on a mission to live well this semester’s moreau experience prompted me to consider how i will live my life well and what it truly even means to pursue a life well-lived. one such way to begin to discern these questions is to create a personal mission statement to define your values and hold yourself accountable. in week 13, the final week of moreau, we were asked to write our own mission statement. mine reads: “i, jacqueline margaret cox, as a young woman in an ever-changing world, pledge to uphold my values in order that i may best serve myself, others, and society. i use my passion for media, art, and performance to contribute to my own personal wellbeing, as well as give me additional skills to use in my career. i attempt to play every role in my life wholeheartedly, with confidence and grace. for my younger sisters, i am an example of a capable, kind woman that they can look up to. for my parents, i am grateful and will give back what i could never repay to them by making them proud, and by someday caring for my own children with the same love and resolve that they did for me. for my friends, i am a source of help or advice in times of need and a fun-loving companion in times of joy. for myself, i am continuing to work hard in order to achieve my goals. although i may not yet be aware of every specific goal, i look at my life with the perspective that although i can always be better and do more, i still today, am enough” (personal mission statement by moreau fye week thirteen). cox 2 i feel as though my mission statement encapsulates my idea of what it is to live a life well lived. to live well, i believe you should treat yourself well and treat others well. for the next three years of college, i hope to carry out this mission statement by staying true to my values, cultivating my talents, and balancing my own life in order to be both successful and happy, as well as playing all the other roles i play in my life – whether that be a sister, daughter, friend, peer, student, or even stranger – to the best of my ability in order to best serve myself and others. previous to college, in high school, i used to think the best way to live a good, satisfactory life was to be happy all the time. it is so easy to fall into the mindset that if you’re never sad or stressed or upset that somehow your life will become more fulfilling. yet this simply isn’t true. in week 6 of moreau we watched a video in which a man named dr. jihoon kim tells his story of how the accident that paralyzed his entire body has changed his perspective on suffering. he says, “the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). there have been many times in college where i have felt overwhelmed or very upset. people say college is supposed to be the best years of your life and when it doesn’t feel like that it can make you feel confused or resentful. i feel like i never get enough sleep and when i do go to sleep i my head on the ceiling every night because i live like a sardine in a shoebox. i find it so difficult to eat three good, hearty meals in the day and when i do it takes three hours total because of the chaos of the dining hall. i always have too much work and once one assignment gets done another comes along. one of the ways i combat these negative aspects of college is by trying to have perspective and gratitude, as dr. kim does. stress and anxiety and sadness are normal. they will continue to reappear in my life cox 3 even if i can overcome them right now. therefore, i think to myself, how grateful am i that i get to be at this school and receive this education. despite the stress it brings me, it will also bring me knowledge and discipline. how grateful am i that i get to live in a dorm community of all women where i have met my best friends, even if its crammed, we’re all in it together. by doing this, i face my negative emotions head on and progress emotionally towards living a better life. in the future three years of college, in order to treat myself well, i hope to take it one step at a time, remember that negative emotions are normal, and that i am capable of overcoming the problems that i face. sister aletheia, another figure we read about this semester, would likely agree with dr. kim’s sentiments. in week 3 of moreau we read an article about sister aletheia – a nun who has turned the concepts of death and suffering into a religious practice called “moments memori.” in describing her practice, she says, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness . . . but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). by encouraging people to think about their death she reminds them to appreciate the present. one of the primary lessons college has reinforced for me is the fleeting nature of time. there is never enough. i go to pick up coffee and suddenly an hour has passed. i go to study and suddenly it is already 2 am. i walk into my friend’s room for a conversation and only emerge three hours later, accidentally of course. especially at a place like notre dame, there are infinite opportunities and events to attend. there just never seems to be enough time for all work and rest and social interactions i need. this becomes really overwhelming at times. this year, one of my new cox 4 year’s resolutions was to try to be more present. although i still struggle with this every day, i find it truly does make my life more fulfilling. in the next three years of college, i hope to be more present. i can’t believe freshman year is already over, so i know the time will fly by. when i practice being present often, i hope this will lead to an overall life-well lived in the future. in thinking about the future, i often think about what path i will begin on in the years after college. all the different aspects of our lives contribute in some way to an overall well lived life. yet one major attribute is our career. i believe that having a successful and fulfilling career is necessary to living life well. i will be expected to provide for myself one day and i can imagine that if i didn’t like my job, i wouldn’t be living out my purpose to the happiest extent. yet i feel the pressure even as a freshman to have everything figured out — what majors and minors to pick up and therefore what career paths will be available to me. in week four of moreau, we examined some resources from the career development center in which they acknowledged that “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (“navigating your career journey” from meruelo center for career development undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). however, they also reassured us this isn’t necessarily true. just a few months ago i declared my major as marketing and felt really happy about it. i have begun exploring the different paths notre dame offers in the marketing major and it has reaffirmed this idea for me that my one major doesn’t dictate a specific career path. i hope that my excitement about it as well as the flexibility in the major and someday my career will help me lead a fulfilling work life. in the future three years of college, i know i have the resources available to me to try many different subjects and learn a lot, cox 5 regardless of what minors or majors i chose to add – which is also something else i hope to figure out. a lot of the content this semester focused on self-reflection and introspection. another crucial aspect of attempting to live life well is being aware of what is and isn’t positively contributing to your life. sometimes, certain things can fit into both of these categories and make it hard to distinguish where to draw the line at which something beneficial turns into something harmful. for myself, i personally think of technology. having a social media and cell phones allows for instantaneous connections and updates from those we love. i feel as though i have begun to appreciate this in a different way since coming to college. staying close to my best friends and family at home is easier than ever when we can argue over who did the worldle the best in our family group chat and my best friends can facetime me quickly in between classes. however, in the first week of moreau, we read an article about the importance of slowing down especially when it comes to technology. “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). despite the ease with which i can share my life and stay in touch with those i love, my phone can be toxic and addictive, distracting me from what is important and consuming far too much of my time. technology has made the world more amazing, innovative, and efficient, but also in many ways more stressful. i find myself using my phone as a distraction or a coping mechanism, but it never makes me less stressed. throughout the rest of my college career, i want to learn when to put my phone down and how to do my work more efficiently without it as such a constant distraction. by keeping this in mind and remembering to recenter myself and make the best use of technology, i hope to keep it in line as something that contributes positively to my life. cox 6 one of the most essential aspects to a life well-lived as well as the second half of fulfilling my own personal mission statement involves good relationships with others and doing your part well in all the roles you play in these various relationships. you can have a good life, but how good is it truly if you have no one to share it with? i personally think some of the greatest joy we can experience comes from loving and serving others. in week five of moreau, we were instructed to have a conversation with someone close to us who knows us well enough to help us discern what a life well-lived is. i chose my mom. when i asked her what she thought i valued most in life she said she thought i valued my relationships. we talked about how trying to understand others as well as being understood gives purpose to one’s life (discernment conversation moreau fye week five). especially at college, what brings me some of the greatest joy is the friends i have made. there are many fun activities and educational lessons that have made my life better, but sharing it with the people around me — helping my friends with homework, ranting over boys, getting every meal together, learning things about them and telling them things about me — is the most meaningful part. in week 9 of moreau we discussed the concept of accompaniment and what it means to accompany someone. i think this idea nicely compliments the “treating others well” aspect of my overall idea of living life well. it may not be just enough to have good relationships or treat everyone kindly, some relationships are truly those of accompaniment ones in which both parties teach something to the other and change each other’s situation or perspective in a meaningful way. in his writing about teaching accompaniment, steve reifenberg includes a quote from fr. gustavo gutiérrez in which he says, “‘solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless . . . this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard’” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning cox 7 journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). one way to attempt to treat others well and to carry out my own mission statement would be to give or serve those less fortunate than us. however, as fr. gutiérrez warns, when helping the poor or impoverished, many people take on a sort of savior role. true, doing things for others is a joyful thing; it can bring our life meaning, but it can also make us feel good about ourselves. therefore, it is important to remember the inherent value of service. true service that will benefit both parties to others comes from a place of compassion. you can go on the parish service trip because your mom made you and still probably feel good about it after, but when you truly desire to help others out of love, you will do the best work. likely, you will learn that those you are serving can also do a lot for you in return, whether that comes in a returned favor or the lessons you learn through helping. from this true type of service comes solidarity and accompaniment. when you approach accompaniment from a place of humility, you find things in common with those you accompany. another way to be an active participant in lifting up others and staying true to your values is through politics. college is usually the first time most people start to vote for the first time. i haven’t had the opportunity to vote in a real election yet, however as the time approaches, i have found myself thinking more about my political beliefs this semester. in the past, i have had kind of an aversion to politics simply because of how polarized the country is, but also because of how ignorant and facetious people are. most people – and sometimes myself included – are quick to believe everything they hear. in the podcast hidden brain media, eitan hersh remarked, “it seemed to me that the way that people are doing politics is much more similar to a hobby than to what i think of with politics, which is, you know, acquiring power” (“passion isn’t enough” (hidden brain media) by eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven). although people cox 8 think that it is their civic duty to stay informed, they unconsciously treat politics as entertainment. by following along and feeling extreme emotional ties to “their side” they believe they are engaging passionately, but their contribution has little to no consequence and actually contributes to some of the most prevalent problems with politics today. in week two of moreau we watched the hesburgh movie — an overview and testament to father ted hesburgh’s life. within the movie he is described as extraordinary, however, “[w]hat made him such an extraordinary figure was that he really didn’t really belong to any one side. he belonged to the side of decency . . . and a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). ask anyone at notre dame and they would likely tell you father hesburgh was an example of a life well lived, meeting some of the most influential people and fighting for civil rights. following hesburgh’s example, i think it is important to remember to choose goodness and decency all the time, regardless of “sides.” as cliche as it sounds, one of the most imperative parts of living life well is being a good person and showing love to everyone regardless of their “side” or status. personally, when it comes to politics, i like hearing both sides of situations and find it difficult to completely side with any one political party and adopt all of their stances on issues. i have a lot of opinions, but i also find myself hesitant to vocalize my opinions on issues that i don’t feel well-educated about. in the next few years of college, i hope to follow my own values and strengthen my personal political beliefs, while attempting to engage with others in meaningful dialogue in order to expose myself to many opinions and perspectives. in week 10 of moreau we examined the concept of race as it is perceived and affects us socially. i really enjoyed the reading that week because i thought it provided an interesting perspective of a necessary way to think about my own racial identity. in order to fully accept cox 9 and uplift all people as i want to do, i have to first be aware of implicit biases in my own life. in the article, dr. robin diangelo says,“race is constructed as residing in people of color, whites don’t bear the social burden of race. we move easily through our society without a sense of ourselves as racialized.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). according to the essay, white people are taught to see themselves as individuals rather than a part of a racial group and that makes us unconsciously neglect race issues. the essay also talked about the “deeply internalized, largely unconscious sense of racial belonging in u.s. society” that white people experience. i find that to be so true that i almost don’t even notice it, which is exactly the problem. i think about racism and believe that i am not racist, but i almost don’t even see myself as a “race” because i don’t have to be based on the society we’ve created. in the future, being more educated and aware of issue like race relations and the social construct of race in our society will allow me to fully embrace the background and diversity of others in a way that uplifts everyone. in addition to being aware of these issues, in order to fully embrace and uplift others we also need to make a conscious effort to get to know those different from us. in his article reflecting on racial conflicts from the summer of 2020, dean g. marcus cole says, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i liked that cole gives a real objective that every person can try and accomplish in their own lives in order to continue the process of ending prejudice and injustice – be open to cox 10 others and actively try to expand your perspectives or inner circle. for example, the best experiences i have had learning about concepts such as race or religion in college have simply been in conversations with people different than me. i will take this advice and try to make more of a conscious effort to be kind to and learn even more from those different from me. however, sometimes in tough situations or facing serious issues like race, it can often be difficult to find the resolve to act and make a difference, knowing that you will face backlash, retaliation, misunderstanding, or even threats from those who oppose you or do not understand. this is something that we all must struggle with, but i find it especially prevalent in group settings when a sort of mob-mentality takes over and people feel more pressure when focalizing opinions that might go against the general nature of the group. however, in order to fulfill the stay true to my values aspect of my mission statement, i know that i will surround myself throughout college with people who are strong and share the same mindset as me, wanting to make a difference and stand up for what is right when we have to. pope francis is someone we read about this semester who exemplified similar ideas to dean cole and father hesburgh. he says that “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). lots of people think that in order to live a meaningful life you must change the world. i personally don’t think this. pope francis brings an important perspective that to truly change the world and bring more love in our lives, we have to treat everyone in this way, not just those closest to us. in his ted talk pope francis also says, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” indeed, by loving those around us and cox 11 recognizing that this is at the core of what makes life meaningful, we make the most important difference. if i died tomorrow, would i look back and consider my life well-lived? it is hard to say because i know i have so much more ahead of me. there are many people to love and places to visit and experiences to have that i haven’t gotten to yet. to conclude, i think i would define a good life as being that someday i will be able to look back on my life and be happy, satisfied, and proud of how i acted and what i believed in this world. however, i don’t think there’s any one specific “formula” or recipe to live life well which makes it difficult to always know what to do. i’m still figuring out how to live on my own in college so it might be a little more time before i decide if i am living truly well. if i had to make an assertation on it, i would say it is by treating others and yourself with kindness that we best attempt to live well. throughout the rest of my college experience, i hope that by treating myself and others well, i can fulfill my personal mission statement, being the best version of myself and playing every role that i play in my life to the best of my ability. 2 ∫∫∫∫ moreau 11/30/2021 in life and uni: challenges, community, hope during life, we encounter many challenges. these range from mundane challenges, such as minor quizzes or our pencil-tips breaking, to overwhelming challenges, like encountering a welcoming group of friends or overcoming systemic difficulties such as discrimination or socioeconomic status. in order to break through life’s challenges, i believe we must find a good community and set of friends to provide a backbone of support, and we must use effort and perseverance alongside hope. dissonance is one challenge that is very common for college freshmen. dissonance is when sounds clash inharmoniously, and it is also how one feels when they clash inharmoniously with new surroundings with which they have not yet resonated. i have encountered dissonance when arriving at notre dame from not being used to the types of students i interact with. there are many more athletic and liberal-arts-focused people at notre dame than what i became familiar with in high school. in addition, many of the people at notre dame are accustomed to party culture and drinking culture. overall, there was a lot of social dissonance between me and others when i arrived at notre dame. to ease this dissonance, i have formed close-knit friendships with a few students. such friends help me feel accepted despite being so uncomfortable around a large portion of students. even so, the dissonance has not completely gone away. there is an element of perseverance in quelling the social dissonance, as over time as i interact socially with more people at notre dame and am more accustomed to it, the remaining dissonance will fade. a specific type of dissonance that is often talked about for new students entering notre dame is imposter syndrome. imposter syndrome is a feeling where one feels like an impostor among us, as if they ne’er do well enough in life to deserve being with those around them, or feel outclassed in skill. this is a natural resistance to recognizing oneself’s own prowess. for me, there is a weak sense of imposter syndrome when i hear about how many ap courses some students took in high school, or see their skills in some very impressive thing i cannot do like piano or theatre. however, for the most part i already overcame most imposter syndrome issues in high school. my high school pooled together the smartest people around the county into a single school (the school was in high demand, a free public school, and had an entrance exam, so only the smartest students with the highest scores could get a spot; some of those high-school peers of mine are currently at other top schools including mit and the ivies). during high-school, i had to get used to being around people who regularly won big math or research competitions whilst maintaining near-perfect grades. again, perseverance and effort were my friend, and i was able to make it through high school successfully and land here at notre dame. as julia hogan puts it: “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan—moreau week 9). i should not let my own perceptions of others’ expectations for how good i should be restrict me or cause mental suffering. unfortunately, there is now the reverse sense in which imposter syndrome can be problematic in my life. i have to be mindful that i can myself cause other people in the community to feel imposter syndrome, being that i am performing well in school and do impressive sprite-work (a form of digital art). a part of finding a good sense of community is being an upstanding member of said community, without sacrificing one’s own sense of self, so it is important that i keep in mind my own ripples on others’ mental sonars. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau entering university, dissonance and imposter syndrome may break us down, but by getting through these problems, we can build ourselves back up into better people with stronger values. as said by kirsten helgeson of grottonetwork, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson—moreau week 10). the lesson is that though we may not like hardship, it is a natural thing to experience (“our hearts are breakable”), and overcoming it can be beneficial for our personal growth. to ensure that we beat our challenges, we can look to the help of our friends and local communities. community is important for it is always around us and thus constantly influences our life. our communities may provide support when we are in times of need, but one does not have to like every community member. regardless, the heart of community is inclusion, even if not everyone sees eye to eye. as parker j. palmer says, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer—moreau week 11). by exposing yourself to the entire community, one can gain a better understanding of the world, which can also help with tackling both one’s own problems and the larger issues of the world. one more means to tackle life’s issues is a healthy combination of perseverance and hope. life is a function; it requires effort as input, and (usually) pops out rewards as the output. perseverance is to maintain effort over a long period of time, especially during challenges, until one emerges at the end. however, it is not always easy to will oneself to do so much over the long term. that is what hope is for. hope is believing in a better future or a sustained good, and is a driving reason to put effort into life if it is clear that the effort will lead to the realization of https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ these hopes. hope is also a way to justify our decisions and change, as it can meaningfully back up what we choose in our minds. according to the notre dame campus ministry, “we need to have hope… to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by the notre dame campus ministry—moreau week 12). what this means is that hope can and should be used as a tool to support continued learning about topics we think we know about. by hoping we can get something out of revisiting and questioning old beliefs, it may actually be the case that we do. overall, hope is a powerful tool when combined with effort and perseverance. during life, we encounter many challenges. for first-time college students like me, some of these challenges include dissonance and impostor syndrome. community, hope, and perseverance, especially when used correctly, can be the means to overcome these challenges. with the right tools in the toolbox of knowledge, we can tackle anything, remaining healthy and sane in the process, and be ready for what’s next https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192591?module_item_id=109468 moreau integration 1 moreau integration 1 professor retartha 10 october 2021 gateway growth with the recent information that housing may not be available to gateways next year, i have been blessed with the gift of reflection, truly taking a step back and realizing why i am at notre dame. originally, i took my experience as a gateway for granted, only thinking about the future instead of taking time to live in the present moment. i sacrificed time thinking about what i needed to do to seem like a “normal” notre dame student instead of embracing all that i was gifted with. being a gateway is not always the easiest. oftentimes, people are quick to judge that we are not “smart enough” or “hard working” enough to get into notre dame the “real” way, immediately being dismissed by others after saying “i’m gateway.” this dismissal makes it hard to be vulnerable, which, as evidenced in “the power of vulnerability” video by brene brown, is crucial in order to develop lasting and meaningful relationships. furthermore, after listening to the ted talk titled the “danger of a single story,” many have categorized the gateways into one specific stereotype rather than trying to view each person’s own unique story truly getting to know their unique and authentic selves. on the other hand, i have also encountered many people who are open and willing to learn about the experience as well as my own unique personhood, in order to develop a meaningful relationship. i realized that i can choose to look at my gateway experience as a unique and special opportunity that not many get to be a part of, or i can choose to look at it in a negative light, wishing i was a “real” notre dame student. with this in mind, i believe that my purpose is to accept everyone for who they are no matter who they are, as well as embrace the unique experience that i was gifted with as a gateway. while it is easy to think about the drama that has been incited coming from not being able to have housing, i believe that i will grow the most by focusing on the good. to me, this good means searching for and realizing the life-giving relationships that i have been fortunate enough to encounter during my time as a gateway. throughout high school, i had a hard time being my true self around my friends, always trying to pose as someone i was not in order to fit in and belong in places where i knew i didn’t. because of this, i did not take the time to get to know and appreciate each person’s unique narrative that shaped who they were as a person. instead i focused on the subjective aspects of friendship, ones that would not last forever. after reading olivia taylor’s “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship,” i realized that many of the relationships that i forged throughout high school were for the worse instead of the better. i was never able to feel like my most true, genuine, and authentic self, until i was introduced into the gateway community. the amount of genuine and true friends that i have made throughout my short time as a gateway is something that is truly remarkable to me. i was nervous coming into the experience wondering if i would be “popular enough” and “cool enough” to fit in with the crowd. from the get go, i was welcomed with open arms by the gateway community, whether that included teachers, peers, or former gateways. no matter who it was, they were willing to get to know the unique me, appreciating me for all that i had, both the good and the bad. i have noticed that the friendships i have forged here enable me to always be my most genuine and authentic self. i am not afraid of trying to constantly impress people to fit in, and i feel like i belong with the people that i surround myself with. after taking the character strengths survey, i realized that i have worked to surround myself with people who have a similar mindset, but also challenge me to be better in the areas that i lack. it is easy to only focus on what comes naturally, but the real growth comes from practicing what is difficult. some of my strengths included humor and kindness, while one of my weaknesses was love. i was upset by this, but also realized that surrounding myself with people who show their love for me and boost me to be better at loving myself would enable me to grow much more quickly as a person. on the same hand, i realized that growing up in utah has deepened my perfectionist nature, which has both very positive and negative aspects. i often do not give myself enough credit and love, feeling like i am not enough if something doesn’t turn out perfectly. fortunately, i have met so many people here that make me feel like i am constantly enough, which has enabled me to grow in both courage and love. i no longer feel ashamed to be from utah, but rather proud of where i am from because it has shaped me into the unique person that i am today. i am proud of the person that i am, and i have realized that i am not going to be perfect one hundred percent of the time. in the end, i have realized that i have been blessed with the gateway opportunity for a specific reason, and i am meant to see the commitment through, even when it seems like the wrong path. no matter what happens with housing next year, i am blessed with lasting relationships and people that will always hold a special place in my heart. the memories that i have created with them and the memories that i will continue to create are some that i will never forget. i have been so fortunate to meet the most special people who have inspired me to be better, loving myself and loving others more so than i have done in the past. together we are gateway and always will be a gateway cohort, coming together and supporting each other through both the good and the bad times. as we lit candles at the grotto on sunday october 10th, i saw this dynamic firsthand and realized in that present moment that i am where i need to be, no matter what happens. i am at notre dame to fulfill my purpose as a person and a student loving, appreciating, and opening up to all different types of people as well as opportunities. moreau-integration two 3 december 2021 “it was then that i carried you”: the importance of community when i needed it the most it’s two in the morning. the lounge of mcglinn is mostly quiet, save my boyfriend and i struggling to write, and i sit here with my thoughts. i worry that over this semester i have started to take this place for granted. sure, i make sure to stop by south quad to see the dome at night, and i still take advantage of the clubs here, but i feel like i have begun to live weeks at a time, just floating through deadlines, scraping by until the end of the semester. my sexuality, my gender identity, and many other aspects of my life lean in every direction they could; i am placed directly in the middle of life and just focused on existing. i have stress induced illnesses and panic attacks so often it can’t be healthy, but i have no chance to change anything about my situation. i don’t feel broken, but i can’t help but remember the japanese art of kintsugi and drawing connections to my experience and a shattered piece of pottery that no one has gotten around to fixing yet ( “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto) -moreau fye week ten). i feel isolated when i am struggling, but throughout my notre dame experience, community has grown in importance as i look to my notre dame community more for love and support. before high school, i was bullied and not given much attention. i had a few friends, and treasured them, but knew i didn’t want to be left in the shadows. in high school, i made a name for myself. while i was supported, it was an independent process. coming to notre dame, i was asked to actively participate in everything. i was ready to pave my way to friends and opportunities, and i was pleasantly surprised when i was called over to booths and invited to social events. for quiet, independent me, i felt that i didn’t deserve everyone being so nice to me. i felt like i was playing two people. i was the same old energetic me on the outside, but on the inside, i felt incredibly numb. there was a sense of acute imposter syndrome that i was faking who i was and how well i was doing, and that was why people were interacting with me. (video: "what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox, ted-edmoreau fye week nine). every once and a while though, i just let myself enjoy it. a couple of days ago, i was comparing myself to others again. my boyfriend was going to dinner with some friends, and i mourned that i didn’t have a group to do that with. not even an hour later, a friend of mine invited me to dinner. last night, he came to my concert to support me, and it made my night. singing with my choir and interacting with the family i made there, it all made me realize that i am being offered love and support when i need it the most, that to be worthy of it, i need inner acceptance that i am allowed to have those things regardless of where i am in life. to quote palmer, “receptivity involves inner work” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week twelve.) after the concert, a random married couple approached me after the show to say they loved how happy and energetic i looked performing messiah with my choir. it could have heightened my sense of imposter syndrome – i barely knew some of the pieces and had been scolded for not looking up during practices – but it didn’t. i was happy and proud of my work and greatly appreciated the support. to top it all off, my friend and i were walking home together and discussing music, and he confessed he had a song i had written stuck in my head. i https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ shared some of my other work with him, including the first song i wrote as a freshman in high school. to me, my first song was not great, but i thought it was a good example of my progress and how i could write songs from a single line that popped into my head during the weirdest of times. i had come up with both mentioned songs from single lines, which we had been discussing. he was so enthusiastic about my music, and his support meant the world to me. he offered to work together on music in the future and to get me in a booth to record. i had never shared my music and having so much support for the few pieces i had become comfortable sharing felt good. it pulled me out of myself for an instant, and i almost forgot the stress and numbness i had experienced. people here are so kind, and it warms my heart every time i experience or witness the good people of notre dame, despite my shortcomings and conflicts. seeing what i can be when i have this love and support has given me hope that i can return to my old happy and energetic self. i was at a low point this semester. i felt alone and out of touch with god and was distraught at this occurrence; this was the opposite of what i wanted while at notre dame. i looked around at my more devout friends and was jealous and uncomfortable with my faith life, specifically. because of my sexuality and gender orientation, i grew afraid of the catholic community. i felt i couldn’t belong there even when i wanted to, more than anything, return to the church. in writing this integration, i regain hope that i will find him. even the evilest of beings agree that god appears at a person’s lowest moments and that he is the happiest when you seek him at those times when you feel he has forsaken you (screwtape letters by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week thirteen). because of these, i regain hope that perhaps there remains a chance of redemption for me. as a result of my notre dame experience, as i have become slowly disconnected from the world and myself, i have re-encountered the importance of community. it is the reason i picked this school, and the reason i have not been lost in the cracks due to depression and mere exhaustion and burnout. i have hope that i can return to my former glory. i have received so much love and support from my peers, my teachers, and even from strangers. in these low moments i have encountered, i look to my community. i do and will respond to their kindness with my own, and i will keep working to accept their kindness and that i am worthy of it. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28128/files/186057?module_item_id=102830 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28128/files/186057?module_item_id=102830 moreau first year experience integration 1 megan mcintyre comment by michael comuniello: @mmcinty3@nd.edu -megan, thank you so much for sharing a rough draft of your integration assignment with me. for the most part, it is very well done. i'll have some questions and comments for you to further reflect on after you submit your final draft. for now, i've just made comments specific to the technical aspects of your integration reflection. most notably, i believe there are a few instances where you could more directly tie in your own experience, stories, etc. from the semester. expected assignment grade: 188/200 _assigned to megan mcintyre_ 10/14/21 my roots and my trees 1. i believe that i am responsible for making everyone feel loved and appreciated. the origin of my first root belief comes from my own need for love and belonging. i think that in order for people to establish connections with one another, they need to first have a sense of acceptance. it is imperative that we as human beings build a place where everyone feels welcome and appreciated. in a world where there is so much diversity and so many conflicting ideas, this may sometimes be challenging. however, while we do not always have to agree with each other, we hold the responsibility to respect each other. for example, one of my close friends here is not religious. she does not go to church and does not hold the same religious beliefs as myself and many of my catholic friends. however, she never makes fun of our faith or discredits its validity. in fact, i have had some of the most interesting discussions with her regarding faith: we have spoken about the purpose of church and delved into why we each believe what we do. we have not let our differences in opinion get in the way of our friendship. comment by michael comuniello: megan, you touch on this in the next few sentences, but i'm wondering how you might better incorporate your own experiences and relationships here. what experience comes to mind where you may not have agreed with someone, but you were able to demonstrate mutual respect? what did this look like? as referenced in the article, “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship,” truly valuable relationships require respect and appreciation of both parties. as i spoke about in my week 4 reflection, i choose friends who i know would go out of their way to include or interact with me. when i feel valued, i am far happier, so i try my best to extend this happiness to others so they can feel the same (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). 2. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by surrounding myself with people who truly care about me and my happiness. life-giving relationships involve people who appreciate our uniqueness. these people drive us to be better versions of ourselves; they hope we succeed and are happy when we are happy. they are the people we want to be like: our role models and peers. those who uplift are far more successful than those who look to simply push others down. in my english class last year, we learned the phrase: “lift as you raise.” this phrase applies to all aspects of life, whether it be grades, social hierarchy, or general power. while i am taking classes at mendoza (hello, mendoza curve!), at notre dame, i rarely find people who are not willing to help others succeed. even in the classes which are curved based on the success of the rest of the class, my fellow classmates are almost always willing to lend a hand. david brooks spoke about the importance of finding our adam 2 characters: the character within ourselves who is more focused on building valuable connections in order to achieve true happiness (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?”: david brooks moreau fye week 2). therefore, i reject the true importance of material wealth and visible status, so pursued by our adam 1 characters. i think that serving others will contribute to both our own happiness and that of those around us. 3. i believe that i grow by accepting myself, including my differences and flaws. there are parts of me which i do not always love. i often question my intelligence. i wonder whether people truly enjoy being around me. i critique my own appearance, my performance in sports, my ability to form relationships. in the past, i was insecure about enjoying my schoolwork; about being asian in a school filled with mainly caucasian people. i was ashamed to eat my mother’s korean food she packed for lunch; to join clubs labelled as “nerdy.” comment by michael comuniello: to the extent you feel comfortable sharing, megan, what are these aspects? later on you, discuss that "pursuing things that made me happy and unique" helped you flourish; similarly, what are these things? also, what experiences at nd have allowed you to further flourish? through the years, i have learned to not hide these aspects, but to accept them. i know that in order for me to build strong relationships with others and to make connections, as well as make others feel accepted, i first need to love and value myself. as stated in the video, “the power of vulnerability,” we build the strongest relationships by expressing ourselves in the most authentic way and being open to sharing inner pieces of ourselves with others (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). in middle school, i would describe myself as very closed off and quite shy. as i began to open up, i saw my friends grow and become closer. i developed as a person as i came out of my shell and pursued the things that made me happy and unique. i stopped hiding the fact that i would sometimes rather read a book in my room than go out with my friends; or make asian food than pick up chick-fil-a. i found my niche with people who either shared common interests or simply accepted mine. as stated by father pete in “the role of faith in our story,” (“the role of faith in our story,” : fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3), the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. in order to know others and to seek happiness and joy in life, we need to first know ourselves best. in some ways, i believe we need to serve ourselves even before we serve others. we can not extend love and appreciation if we do not have any love and appreciation for ourselves. for example, multiple times this semester my family or friends from home needed comforting. however, i am unable to comfort others when i myself am feeling insecure or extremely stressed out. in order to help my close friends/family, i need to take a few moments to reflect on my own feelings. if i am stressed out or anxious, i try to identify the source and try to resolve the issue before i can comfort or help others. i will always make an effort to call my sister if i know she has a test, or is stressed out, even if i am short on time. i have spoken with one of my friends from home, who is having difficulties adjusting to college life, for hours trying to comfort them and support them. by doing this, i have also helped myself as i end up having conversations which lighten the moods of both my friends/family and myself. comment by michael comuniello: how are you serving yourself, so as to better serve others? what has this looked like this semester thus far? george ella lyon states, “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on.” no one else has the same background and upbringing and experiences as you (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau week 6). as we all are different, this begs the question: why should we suppress these differences rather than celebrate them? once we accept our own differences, we become far more open to everyone else’s differences as well. 4. i believe that my purpose is to serve the less fortunate and make the world a better place in any way i can. here at notre dame, it is clear that most of us are extremely fortunate when it comes to resources. we have access to an amazing education and many of us have all the resources we need to succeed right at our fingertips. this is not the case for most of the rest of the world. while i grew up mostly blinded from the ways that those who are less fortunate live, i have begun to recognize the gravity of the suffering and need of others. i have grown to understand the importance of not only being grateful for what i have, but using what i have to help those who are not as fortunate. father kevin grove spoke about the duty we have as humans to help those in need. we need not help others to further our social image or improve the way others see us, but out of direct obligation (“two notre dames: your holy cross education”: fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5). this idea directly connects with the idea of the “universal destination of goods,” which i studied in my theology class. this is the concept that god created this world for the enjoyment of everyone. it professes that those with excess are essentially stealing from the poor, as they are taking more than they need while the poor do not have enough. it is my root belief, which i try to reflect in my actions (by volunteering, donating, and helping others), that everyone who is able to must join to help those in need. 5. i believe that i am searching for knowledge and understanding of the world around me: exposure to multiple perspectives and ideas. though i come from a hometown in which i was exposed to multiple cultures and backgrounds, it is nothing compared to what i have encountered once i ventured past that. through my short college experience thus far, i have learned so much about cultures, beliefs, and backgrounds that i never even knew existed. i have met people who grew up in africa; people who have certain dietary restrictions due to their religion, and people who have moved over 10 times in their life. these types of people bring their own point of view and experiences here to notre dame, for others to learn from in order to broaden our perspectives. i come from a multicultural family, so i have grown up celebrating diversity. while i thought i had a firm grasp on the experiences and backgrounds people have to offer, i simply did not. in many ways, i have led a sheltered life. according to chimamanda ngozi adichie, this is extremely dangerous. when we are not fully informed on a concept, whether it is a part of a foreign culture, or a different belief or religion, we tend to simply make the easy generalizations (“danger of a single story”: chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). knowing one aspect of a particular culture or lifestyle is never enough we must seek knowledge in order to promote acceptance of all people. while it is challenging to continue to broaden horizons when this type of information is not generally taught in school, it is imperative that we all seek understanding of the humans around us so that we may coexist. comment by michael comuniello: what particular experiences or examples come to mind, megan? alejandro castillo 12/3/2021 moreau integration two how do i respond? in life, i believe that it is not necessarily what happens to us that matters. what matters to me is how i/we respond. sometimes we cannot control unfortunate events that are inevitable. in order to keep myself mentally stable at any point in my life, my general approach is to look at the positives. there are way too many things in life that i tend to forget about. when something goes wrong, circling back and thinking about how fortunate i am usually puts me back on track. thinking of positives is one part, but another part is short-term memory. i say short-term because this is what my coaches used to tell me in high school games. if i made a mistake, i needed to recognize it, not do it again, learn from it, and move on to the next play in a short period of time. otherwise, the game will pass me by if i let one mistake decide how the rest of the game will go. i feel like the same thing applies to life because if all we think about is one mistake that we made in the past, then we will be stuck there. i believe life will pass us by and leave us behind if we let it. this is why short-term memory and having a positive mindset has gone a long way for me. in today’s society, everyone is competing to be the best at everything and be the most successful. i feel as if we can get too caught up in this competition at times to the point where we forget about doing what is best for ourselves versus doing what will make others perceive us the way we want or are expected. many times i (i am sure this goes for others as well) find myself accomplishing something that i did not enjoy and feeling as if i have not really accomplished much on top of that. this reminds me of week 9 when i watched elizabeth cox give a tedtalk about impostor syndrome. i am guilty of impostor syndrome to this day which i have mixed thoughts about. although, i am not sure if i would say that i have impostor syndrome or the mindset of never being satisfied (always wanting more). it is a back and forth thing that goes on in my head where i think i am not good/cool enough which either brings me down or motivates me to want to do better. as elizabeth says in the video, it is best to just talk to others about how you feel because that is the only way that people can potentially help you. this brings me back to the topic of being vulnerable with others to help strengthen relationships. i suppose it might be embarrassing to talk about some sensitive topics going on in my life, but if i keep them to myself then i feel that it will weigh heavily on me. along with challenges going on in my life, there are many challenges that my community and all of society faces which need to be addressed. as father jenkins puts it, “if we can help solve the problem of hatred, we have a chance to come together and solve all the others.” i agree with this quote and we should act on it. for myself personally, i believe that not everyone can be a hero so the best way to go about acting upon the problem of hatred is to start with ourselves. this reminds me of man in the mirror by michael jackson. the lyrics beautifully say, “i'm starting with the man in the mirror; i'm asking him to change his ways; and no message could've been any clearer; if they wanna make the world a better place; take a look at yourself and then make a change.” we cannot preach or try to tell others that what they are doing is wrong and hateful if we, ourselves, are not loving and being positive. in today’s society, there are so many different cultures with all types of perspectives, opinions, backgrounds and much more. i feel that it is easy to think that our personal ways that we live by are the only ones to live by and therefore thinking that anyone who lives differently is wrong/weird in some way. it can be hard to build perspective if we are only around certain people all the time. this can lead to young people only assuming what they know to be the truth and the full story which can offend others that come from different perspectives. i believe this is how racism comes about which brings me to a part of professor agustin fuentes’ talk about diversity. it says, “they are due to social, historical, political, economic, and experiential contexts and are changeable.” this quote gives me hope because it is changeable. i also have hope because being at notre dame has and will continue to introduce me to many different perspectives. building my perspective will help prevent me from making overgeneralizations and be able to connect with a wide range of people. hope is a very important and powerful tool that i believe we can and should use. without hope, i feel that i am setting myself up for failure. for example, i think and hope that i am going to play well before a basketball game. if i do not have any hope in myself or my team, then i most likely will lose before the game has even started. for me, it is all about mindset and approach. like i said in the beginning, a positive mindset goes a long way for me. i think everyone should always have hope and a positive mindset. one of the main things that i want to do in my life is educate people who do not have the opportunity to be educated which brings me to a quote from the holy cross and christian education text. it says, “the work of education is essential to the life of the church and its apostolic mission of going out to all the nations proclaiming the gospel as jesus instructed his disciples to do in his final commission.” with this being said, this quote inspires me to want to incorporate my faith into educating others. although, in order to educate others, i have to be educated. fortunately, i am in a position where i can be educated tremendously so i have hope that i can fulfill this goal of mine. peggy hnatusko moreau fye october 15, 2021 belief in the journey college, in many ways, is an end. it’s the end of living at home, the end of going to school with the same people, the end of seeing the same friends every day. i was the only one from my school to attend notre dame and my family recently moved; college was a very finite end to my life in wisconsin. however, college is the first step to a new beginning: life as an adult. it’s a bridge between two definite times in life. as with any transitional period, college also forces us to view our beliefs more critically. after all, our beliefs are what set us apart; beliefs create intangible bonds and differences between people. as i begin the next step in my journey, i evaluate my beliefs and values so that i can find success in my journey. i believe that people are more than an adjective. chimamanda ngozi adichie explains in her tedtalk that often, individuals are remembered and referenced through a single facet of their personality, rather than their entire story ( “danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) . throughout my life, i struggled with the divergence of others’ perception of me and what i thought of myself. people saw me as a think tank, a brain diminished merely to her standardized test score and intellectual successes. like ngozi adichie, i became a single story, defined simply by my academic abilities. i was expected to always outperform with ease, and i felt the pressure to always be perfect. i am so much more than my schoolwork, yet i am always known as “the smart girl.” i believe that we have to look internally to find fulfilment. david brooks reminded us of the difference between adam i, the facet of external success, and adam ii, focused on internal development, and he reiterated the importance of adam ii to the personal journey (“ should you live for your resume or your eulogy ?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2) . i always felt an obligation to be perfect, almost as proof that i was deserving of the pedestal that people placed me on. any academic achievement was never a form of pride; it was merely an expectation. instead, my most memorable moments and achievements came from times of internal growth. i think of my experience with rugby; i was new to the game and wasn’t the best player. i pushed myself to work hard and play to my strengths-being communicative and a positive teammate. when i was named captain, i felt overwhelmed with genuine pride, for i wasn’t working to become captain; it was simply a product of my efforts. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102778 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102778 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102692 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102692 i believe that vulnerability is necessary for growth. we must embrace the uncomfortable to reach our goals. in her tedtalk, dr. brown puts vulnerability at the core of our negative emotions, yet the birthplace of necessary connection ( " the power of vulnerability " by brené brown moreau fye week 1) . like dr. brown, vulnerability is also my greatest struggle. i spent much of my life truly believing that i wasn’t allowed to fail because that’s what people expected of me. in my mind i needed to prove that i was as perfect as everyone believed me to be. i grew to view vulnerability and emotions as a weakness, so i kept my struggles as my burden to bear. i self-isolated my doubts, and i refused to ask for help. however, on the rare occasions where i did open up, i’ve felt bonded to the people who support me. i’ve connected with friends on similar issues, and i feel more confident facing my problems afterwards. i’m realizing that being vulnerable is essential to my growth in both myself and my relationships. i believe that relationships are the cornerstone to support and security. relationships are necessary to personal growth, yet they can also be a hindrance. when relationships, romantic or platonic, become uneven, manipulative, or controlling, they become unhealthy or even toxic. in an article for the grotto, olivia taylor lists friends talking about you behind your back, only hanging out with you when it’s convenient, and not engaging in your interests ( "healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign moreau fye week 4) . throughout my life, i have had many unhealthy friendships. there were “friends” that excluded me, talked behind my back, and didn’t support me. throughout these mishaps, i’ve learned what i’m looking for in a friend. i’ve had to let friendships go and truly find who would stick by me, friends who would make me better instead of causing me pain. i believe that we must recognize our journey and growth. drawing inspiration from george ella lyon’s where i’m from poem, i created my own poem relating to my past and influences ( "where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6) . i had to look back and assess the most impactful parts of my life, find what helped to shape me into who i am today. i have had my fair share of hardships, and now, looking back, i’m proud of the growth that came from working through those difficulties. i found that my family had a profound influence on how i solve problems and view the world. oftentimes, i spend too much time looking ahead, and i never stop to realize all that i’ve accomplished. i’m proud not only of my family and my town, but also where i’ve come from personally. i believe that risks and sacrifices are a necessary part of the journey. (fr. sorin letter) in father sorin’s letter, he writes to basil moreau about his journey to found notre dame in south bend. in his letters, he outlined the many hardships he and his followers endured: walking for miles, sleeping on the floor, trekking through cold weather, and much more. father sorin made https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102760 many sacrifices to found notre dame. he was willing to give up his job and livelihood to build and cultivate notre dame (“ fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” moreau fye week 5). father sorin shows how sacrifices are essential to reaching your goals, and it gives me confidence to take risks in my life. i am unsure of what i want to do after college, and it’s stressful to know that i don’t have a foreseeable plan. father sorin reminds me that taking risks is a normal part of life, and i can still succeed so long as i have faith in myself. i believe that we must have faith, both in ourselves and each other. my entire life, i have struggled with religion and catholicism. i often disagreed with parts of the church, and as i grew older and more analytical, i found myself straying away. i think i surprised my parents by choosing a catholic university. however, father pete spoke of religion in terms of faith. to father pete, faith means hope and patience in the face of adversity. faith means finding the small things in life that you can enjoy, and believing that those things will continue to come ( “ the role of faith in our story ” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3) . since being on campus, i have truly enjoyed the immersion of faith, and i have found myself choosing to utilize masses and the grotto frequently. instead of straying further away, i am growing my faith in myself and others. i am choosing to have faith in my future. i do not have my journey planned out. my future is a gaping unknown, an overwhelming reality that i am not perfect; i don’t have an end goal. but i believe in myself. i believe in the journey i have taken thus far, i believe in the support group i have built around me, and i believe in the leap of faith i am taking. i believe that i will keep on growing, and i believe that i will end up exactly where i am supposed to be. true, it’s daunting and full of difficulties, but i am no longer hiding my perceived weakness in order to maintain a distorted view of myself; i am taking a risk and having faith that i will find my own fulfillment. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102707 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102707 the struggles to achieve happiness at the start of the semester, i believed that i would be living my best life here at college. while this is true, i never imagined my best life to include moments of difficulty and pain. but i have learned that with the greatest happiness, there comes some of the most painful lows. at points, i had to ask myself at what point is a person truly broken beyond repair and how is it even possible to survive certain situations. but the more time i have spent in this community and with friends, i have learned that in brokenness, there is beauty, and in every situation that seems hopeless, there is a strength in me that allows me not just to survive but come out with a zeal to live and be happy. in high school, i never truly fit in, but at the same time, i never had that expectation. i always imagined that in college, i would be accepted and find my place. for the first time in my life, i would no longer feel like an outsider. however, i discovered that, through the ups and downs, i sometimes feel alone and like i do not belong. especially at a school like notre dame, where half of the time i feel like i am one of the stupidest people in the room, i can feel like an imposter. still, i always force myself to remember that i got in for a reason, and while i might not be the best at calculus or any science, i can write a history paper with a solid argument. as elizabeth cox states, “perhaps we can feel freer to be frank about our feels and build confidence in some simple truths: you have talent, you are capable, and you belong (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine).” each person has strengths and weaknesses, and sometimes my weaknesses can feel overwhelming and form these ideas that, while completely wrong, cloud my thinking, causing doubt. but one of the best things about notre dame is the people and places. a walk around the lake or a stroll by the grotto gives me a break from what can seem like a never-ending class relentless day. and the people we meet here help us see clearly and keep going even when we feel like we have hit our limit. the support available gets students to push past their limits and grow beyond what we thought was possible. even though this university has incredible support to help students, i have learned that beyond just academics and life on campus, the world can throw curveballs that can truly knock a person down. this semester i have experienced the highest of highs, but i have also experienced extreme lows. even though no one ever says life is easy, to a degree, i never understood just how hard it could be. but even though i have felt like i’m in an endless black tunnel, i know that the light will come soon, and when it does, i will come back stronger than ever. even amid my brokenness, i know that when i put back all the pieces, the result will be even more beautiful than how i started. as kirsten helgeson says, “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson – moreau fye week ten)” the philosophy behind the japanese art of kintsugi describes the beauty that exists in brokenness. each painful experience ends in a person realizing their own strength and building their character. even though i have felt like i am broken beyond repair, i have discovered that the only way to stay broken is to give up. as long as i am still willing to fight for the life i want, i will always pick up the pieces and come back a stronger person. but even when i feel alone and broken, i’ve always found that the bonds i’ve made while at college are stronger than i could have ever expected. the community i am a part of is unlike one i’ve ever known. i always knew that you could not force yourself into a community because a community is a natural sense of belonging. i have learned that i have no control over the communities i am a part of, but i am beyond grateful to have them. as parker j. palmer says, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received (“thirteen ways of knowing” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven).” the notre dame community and my community of friends are a gift that has no price tag or conditions for acceptance but only require me to accept them and simply be me. throughout the semester, i have received some extremely hurtful comments, many of which made me question my value and worth; however, my friends immediately noticed my silence and talked with me so that once again, i regained my confidence. my community gives me the motivation to keep pushing forward and find my way back to happiness. in a single word, they give me hope. even at my lowest moments, small little glimmers of hope gave me the motivation to keep on moving forward toward the life i want for myself. as fr. james b. king said, “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week twelve).” especially this semester, i have learned that no goal or achievement comes without any difficulty or obstacles. specifically in academics, i realized that i needed to improve my spanish writing skills in order to attain a good grade. while this did not come easy, over time, i developed these necessary skills, and now i am almost at an a. no matter how impossible an obstacle may seem, determination and resilience will ensure success. anything truly worth achieving will have obstacles, but those difficulties are what make success all the more worthwhile. my experiences throughout the semester have taught me that no matter what happens, through hope and a community, i will survive and actually thrive. i discovered the skills to deal with challenging situations, and more so now than ever before, i have the resilience to come out of any situation stronger and happier. i have learned that each person has experienced brokenness, but that brokenness does not define a person. instead, their strength and resilience define them. every argument among friends, each low grade, and every painful comment pushes me to become a fiercer me. no person or event can totally ruin me because i have the power to build myself back up, and i control my own happiness. every situation has hope for a happier life, and with my community, i will never feel completely alone. this semester has shown me my own strength and the strength that i have found in my friend group. capstone integration caroline van bell capstone integration a life well lived: cvb my mission statement: i am at my best when i am working towards a goal that matters to me. i am at my worst when i worry too much about things that i cannot control. i am truly happy when i am surrounded by people i love, doing something that brings me joy. i want to be a person who is known for their kindness, wisdom, and love. someday i would like to travel to every continent on the planet. my deepest positive emotions come when i am hiking, running, swimming, or skiing in crisp, fresh, outdoor air or when i am sharing a meal with family or friends. my greatest talents and best gifts are setting challenging goals for myself and reaching those goals, and also the ability to have perspective about the struggles and successes in my life. when all is said and done, the most important things in life are my faith, my family and my health. my mission is to live my most joyful, loving, healthy life and inspire others to live their lives to the fullest. i will seek to recognize god’s guidance throughout the good times and the bad times. i want to be at peace with myself and my place in the world. i aspire to be a source of love and joy. i view every day as an opportunity to seek joy. i am constantly growing, learning, and evolving.1 making a path for pursuing a life well-lived isn’t easy. it requires a deep introspection, a realization of your own beliefs and values, and coming up with ideas for how you can most fully live out your values. 1 personal mission statement, week 13 throughout my first year at notre dame, i’ve taken fascinating and challenging courses, met incredible people, and made many formative memories. this past year has been simultaneously the most joyful, stressful, and significant period of growth of my life thus far. throughout these past months, i have started to formulate what a life well-lived looks like for me. i anticipate that my path for pursuing a well-lived life will change as i continue in my notre dame journey, and i certainly hope that my path evolves. my experiences thus far have shaped what i value, my goals, and my ideas about who i am and what i will become. one piece of advice that has shaped my mission statement and life outlook is that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the watersjust get out and experience life.”2 i’ve definitely learned this via my experiences this semester. i learned a lot about my leadership skills and my ability to form relationships with other people in my dorm community when i decided to run for ryan hall vice president this spring. i was really nervous and unsure of myself, especially because i was only a freshman. but i am so glad that i ran (and ended up winning), because it has already allowed me to feel so connected to the incredible people in ryan. i feel so much joy working with the girls in ryan and find the position of vice president very challenging but rewarding. as pope francis said in his ted talk, the foundation of what you do needs to be rooted in a love for the people around you, and i have found this to be great guidance for my role as ryan vice president.3 this semester, i learned that i am at my worst when i spiral into worry about things i cannot control, and also when i have self-doubt. this was a difficult realization for me, but talking to my parents helped me form this realization. they gave me the advice to work on quieting the voice of self-doubt in my mind; the one telling me that i’ll never be creative enough, smart enough, or confident enough.4 this is definitely something that i am still working on as i pursue a well-lived life, because my self-doubt can take over my mental energy and can drain me. if i let my anxious thoughts take over, it makes it very difficult to direct my focus towards the pursuits that are truly important to me. another thing i am still working on in my life well-lived is keeping this in mind: the more time i spend away from my work, the 4 phone call with debbie and marc van bell, week 5 3 “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, week 7 2 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development, week 4 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ better that work will be, most often.5 i am more inclined to say that i “worked” for a few hours, but in actuality half that time i was distracted and not actually working. i’ve learned that i do better when i have more things scheduled outside of schoolwork, because i am able to work much more efficiently and effectively, and i get to have the important experiences with my friends, clubs, and self-care activities that are important in helping me grow holistically. another area of growth in my life well-lived is incorporating daily reflection and prayer so that i can come to truly know myself by knowing god.6 it can be frustrating at times to think about how i used to be much better about mindfulness and prayer during high school, and feel disappointed that i am not doing these things as much as i used to. however, i think this is definitely part of a well-lived life; we realize where we’ve slipped, don’t beat ourselves up too much, and try to get back up and keep going. something that has stuck with me from this semester is the truth that it is “in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.”7 i think this mindset is another critical aspect of a life well-lived that i am still working on. it can be very difficult to stay optimistic when things are tough, but a strong mindset can be so important in finding the light during dark times. this spring semester has allowed me to form new friendships, strengthen my friendships from the fall, and challenge myself intellectually. one story that stuck with me was from the movie “hesburgh” when father hesburgh was given an emerald ring by the pope, and the ring simply sat in his desk collecting dust.8 while this snippet from the hesburgh movie might seem trivial and unrelated, i think it is truly one of the most vivid representations of a life well-lived. a life well-lived is one that is focused on relationships and experiences, rather than the accumulation of wealth or status. additionally, in my relationships i continue to think about how i can use “all the skills and talents and experience [i have] to engage and allow your highest realization of your potential.”9 i think this concept of accompanying someone to allow them to reach their highest potential is very meaningful. accompaniment is so 9 “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg, week 9 8 “hesburgh”, week 2 7 “meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, week 3 6 “ways to practice mindfulness” by mcwell, week 6 5 “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, week 1 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ important in living a life well-lived, because it allows you to grow as a kind, wise, loving person; i am not a servant of others, but a neighbor. true accompaniment and encountering others in service is living out one of the most fundamental aspects of the holy cross mission.10 this semester, i had the opportunity to volunteer through mercy works, which is a joint project between the csc and campus ministry. every tuesday afternoon, i took the bus to hope ministries, where i simply played with elementary school age children for a few hours. we would have such a great time, playing mariokart and apples to apples, and it was incredible to know and see how the simple act of play was rewiring their brains and helping them heal from the trauma they’d experienced from such a young age. i think in the fast-paced life of college and constant notifications, news, social media, it can be difficult to slow down and really notice the relationships where we can find god’s love for us. one place where i came to realize god’s love for us was through my involvement with mercy works. i formed incredible relationships with the other nd students in my volunteering group, and with the kids we saw each week11. i think a well-lived life is one where we can form true relationships with others, and pay attention to the love that we have in our friendships. in my well-lived life, i want to be known as a person who is kind, wise, and loving; and i think that part of being known as someone who encompasses these characteristics is finding common ground with others and respecting differences too.12 as i continue to grow in my journey of a life well-lived, i hope to keep coming back to and refining my mission statement, using the experiences i have the next 3 years here to shape who i am and who i will become. 12 “passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media, week 11 11 “growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, week 10 10 “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” week 12 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ strong roots grow strong relationships i believe that life-giving relationships are forged by honesty and vulnerability. i believe that my community should go above and beyond to care for each other. i believe that true happiness is found by being my most authentic, confident self. i believe that i will grow by accepting failure and embracing mistakes. i believe that my purpose is to pursue knowledge and understanding of myself and others. i believe that faith plays a central role in my personal development. i believe that i am made to spread kindness and love to others. my first root belief, that life-giving relationships are forged by honesty and vulnerability, has been something that has been instilled in me from a young age. my parents have always stressed the importance of honesty, empathy, and the importance of embracing any imperfections that we perceive ourselves to have. one memory from my childhood that distinctly reminds me of the importance of being vulnerable is from a summer camp that i went to in elementary and middle school. one night our counselors had everyone in my cabin sit on the floor, and they played the song “freckles” by natasha bedingfield. after the song ended, we were allowed to share how any part of the song spoke to us and any insecurities that we had. as corny as it sounds, that night brought everyone in my cabin closer, and i am still good friends with most of the girls almost 10 years later. being vulnerable with each other allowed us to form a bond that will last a lifetime. i think this story speaks to the relevance of “having the courage to be imperfect.” (“ the power of vulnerability ” by brené brown moreau fye week one) by sharing our fears and insecurities with each other, we were brought so much closer to one another. i think it's important to keep this in mind throughout college as i search to create more friendships and bonds that will last a lifetime. my second root belief states that i believe that my community should go above and beyond to care for each other. during the week 6 where i’m from poem, i reflected on the small town i grew up in, and the strong sense of community we had. coming from such a small, close-knit community to a much larger area has certainly been overwhelming at times, but the sense of community on the notre dame campus has helped to make the transition much easier. it is evident how everyone truly cares for one another, and wants to see each other succeed. the videos we watched during week 4 of moreau fye emphasized the importance of looking out for one another and keeping each other safe. college is an extremely fun time, but many people also find themselves in potentially dangerous or uncomfortable situations. being an active bystander plays an important role in keeping the community and campus safe. just recently i was with someone who was making me uncomfortable, and my friends came by at just the right time to help me leave the situation. if they hadn't stepped in, the situation could’ve ended up much worse. i hope to use this experience to be able to recognize when other people may be uncomfortable in a situation and be able to help them before it is too late. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be i believe that true happiness is found by being my most authentic, confident self. this value is important to me because we are so often influenced by societal standards and expectations, even though they often do much more harm mentally and physically than good. i have struggled with self confidence growing up, and my goal while at notre dame is to gain more confidence in myself and my actions. i think that this belief relates to the quote, “our lives are not our resumes.” ( two notre dames: your holy cross education by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week six) much of what i did in high school was focused on building the perfect resume or application for colleges, and not based on what i truly wanted to do. i hope to develop this belief further while at notre dame by exploring the many options and opportunities available, and finding what fuels my passion and brings me happiness. the content of week 5 also applies to my next root belief, that i will grow by accepting failure and embracing mistakes. throughout my life, i have always strived to not make any mistakes and to aim for perfection. the pressure that i have placed on myself to do this has helped me in some aspects, but it has also instilled the idea that the only way to succeed is to avoid making any mistakes. i know that the challenges that i will face here at notre dame will force me to embrace mistakes and failures and use them as a learning opportunity to improve for the future. i am excited to further develop this belief and grow personally and academically to have a successful future. my fifth root belief is that my purpose is to pursue knowledge and understanding of myself and others. my parents, from a very young age, stressed the importance of inclusivity and treating others with respect to my siblings and me. while i always did my best to live by these words, growing up in a small, predominantly white town shielded me from the discrimination, hate, and violence in our country. the events of this past year have opened my eyes to the true racism and discrimination that people of color face in the us and throughout the world today. attending protests and taking the time to educate myself on the realities that so many people face has certainly helped me gain a deeper understanding and be more aware of the realities of many people's lives. i hope to use my time at the university of notre dame to continue to learn about many diverse backgrounds and, like the video in week 7 stated, avoid maintaining the narrative of a single story, and gain a deeper understanding of the many different backgrounds that we all come from. my sixth root belief is that faith plays a central role in my personal development. i was raised in a catholic family, and i attended a catholic elementary school through 6th grade. my family had always gone to the same church, but a new priest came in with several ideas that my family and i did not agree with, and going to church began to feel like a chore or obligation. we soon found a new church that reinvigorated a strong sense of community, and definitely strengthened my relationship with god. while at notre dame, i hope to continue to strengthen my faith and build a deeper relationship with god. one quote that stood out to me is, “ we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we only need to look around.” ( "faith brings light to a dark world" by professor david fagerberg week 3 moreau fye) walking around the lakes or stopping by the grotto allow me to feel the presence of god on a much more personal and deeper https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=partner&utm_medium=promotion&utm_campaign=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=partner&utm_medium=promotion&utm_campaign=moreau level. this quote inspires me to use my time at notre dame to see god in everything that is around me, and appreciate the many blessings that i have received. my last root belief is that i believe that i am made to spread kindness and love to others. i have always believed that there is no better thing that we can do than to treat others with love and kindness, and it truly is such a simple task that can go such a long way. being the person to say hi to people that you walk by or checking in on your friends can have a large impact on someone who might be having a rough day or week. i think that this root belief relates to the week 2 material, and living for your eulogy rather than your resume. people will always remember how they felt when they were around you and how you treated them, and treating people with love and kindness is the simplest way that we can show our care and concern for others. i hope to continue to spread kindness to others throughout my time at notre dame, and be the shoulder for my friends to cry on when times are tough, or be there to celebrate the good times and successes. navigating the lows and highs of my first college semester by i always hated being called a popular kid in highschool. or a cool kid. or whatever. it always felt like more of an insult rather than a compliment, and it probably was. to me, popularity is just a construct where the “cool”, “athletic”, and “good-looking” kids’ hangout with each other and let their counterparts befriend themselves too. i always thought of myself as being open to being friends with anyone, so that is why i did not like to be called the cool kid. it made me feel like i was not being true to myself. i had a grudge against the term “cool kids”, and i also had a want to be friends with everyone. i carried this thinking with me into college, which was a major problem for me. these two things do not mix. they contradict each other. when i first got to campus, holy cross had their welcome weekend. all the freshmen gathered in front of the gym. i was nervous, which was normal. it was my first day of college and i had no friends. i thought everyone around me also had no friends, but that was not the case. i remember seeing my classmates high fiving each other, calling people by their first names, and acting all friendly. i was confused. later i learned that a bunch of these people met in the summer and already created their own friend group. they already had drama and love triangles, and it reminded me of high school. i initially labeled this group as “the cool kids” in my mind and i held a grudge against them. i had no interest in being another “cool kid” in college, so i was hesitant to befriend them. reflecting on it now, and it is sad to admit, i almost did not let myself be friends with them. this made the first part of college really difficult for me. i was having a hard time connecting with my roommates and other classmates because i was not allowing myself to do so. i thought they were “cool kids”, and i did not want to be a cool kid anymore. i told my parents about this. my mom and dad both told me stop thinking like that and told me stories about how similar people they from their college experience turned out to be some of their better friends. i did not know it at the time, but these kids really were the same the same as me. they were also scared for college, and nervous about making friends. the only difference between me and them is they reached out to each other before school started, and just because they did this does not make them cool kids and gives me no reason to hold a grudge against them. this made me realize one very important thing. “whether we know it or not, like it or not, honor it or not, we are embedded in community” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j palmer moreau fye week 11). i finally started to let go of my opinions because i remembered that these people are part of my community, and while it’s good to hold beliefs, it is not good all the time. this year we learned that “conviction, however, is not all good. it can easily be corrupted by pride and greed and lead to hatred and division” (wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week 10) . my convictions led to hatred and division, but i have since let go of that conviction. i now have very good connections with people that not three months ago i would have never saw myself hanging around with. as a result, my college experience has been so much more enjoyable. friends are a big part of college. no doubt about that. another huge part of college is the schoolwork, and that has been a problem i have been navigating since the start of the year too. schoolwork is so difficult for me because i am a perfectionist. in week nine we learned that “…individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ others (and themselves)” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit – by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i believe i must be perfect because of expectations. my parents expect me to do good in school, and so do i. this causes a lot of stress for me when i am doing schoolwork, but i am slowly learning how to deal with it. my dad really loves dove chocolates, and in each wrapper, they have these little pick me up quotes with cheesy sayings. he usually sends them to our family, and i often disregard them, but just this past week he sent one that read “do not stop until you’re proud”. this quote was different. when i read it, it meant something to me, probably because it was very relevant to my current situation. right now, all my classes have their deadlines for the final projects. i have two essays due and only a week to write them. usually this stresses me out – a lot – because i do not know how i am possibly going to finish them. it literally sounds impossible, and that goes back to expectations. i expect the papers to be william shakespeare esque when i write them, but that is just not an attainable goal for me. and that’s the thing with expectations. usually, the ones we set for ourselves are impossible to reach. what is not impossible to reach is not stopping until i am proud, and that is why i liked the quote so much. to me, not stopping until i am proud lets me drop all the expectations i have of myself. i can work freely without the constant fear that my work is not perfect, and the ironic thing is, this usually allows me to do better work. this also takes away the stress of grades. if i can say that i did my best work and i am proud of what i came up with, then i do not have to set any expectation of getting a particular grade. it is a very freeing feeling to do work this way. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau learning how to get out of the trough of making friends and doing schoolwork has been two of the most important lessons i have learned so far at college, and when i reflected on how i learned them, another lesson appeared. in week 12, we read and learned a lot about the troughs of life and what we are to do when we are in one. the screwtape letters told us that “to decide what the best use of it is, you must ask what use the enemy wants to make of it, and then do the opposite.” – (the screwtape letters – by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). in both of my examples – making friends and doing schoolwork – i believe i created a lot of problems for myself. it was my own thinking that put me into tough and stressful situations. in a sense, i am my own worst enemy. so, what does my enemy – myself – typically want me to do in those situations? well, the answer is just figure it out. think it through. more specifically, figure it our and think it through by myself. my biggest problem is that in troughs of my life i feel like me and only me has the power to get myself out of the trough. so then, what is the opposite of this? the opposite is asking for help and being open to it. both my situations had one thing in common. i talked and listened to my parents. it was their opinions that led me to change my narrow-minded thinking and be open up to the possibility of becoming friends with people i thought were “too cool” for me. and it was my dad’s dove chocolate messages that made me realize i needed to stop stressing about getting perfect grades and start enjoying the process of making interesting work that i can say i am proud of. the most important thing that was once vague to me in the beginning of the year is that we are not supposed to navigate this crazy world alone. we are surrounded by people for a reason; we are surrounded by a community for a reason. if we are to neglect this fact and become selfish -stuck in our ways then we are doing a great dishonor to our community by filling it with http://c/users/wmiller/downloads/the%20screwtape%20letters%20by%20c.s.%20lewis_chapter%208.pdf division. instead, we must all work together, help each other. the different perspectives we all have and share can be the key that others need to unlock the door and start making their way out of a trough in their life. i can attest to the power of community paired with open mindedness, and it something i will continue to use to my advantage in my life to come. professor lassen moreau 10101-17 5 december 2021 integration 2 prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? in week 9, the topic was about responding to internal and external dissonance. for me i do indeed struggle with perfectionism and because of that, i am my own worst critic and biggest bully. i work really hard for my results because i want the best for me. thankfully, i do not suffer from imposter syndrome because i believe in myself and i know that i am just as smart as my peers. externally, i really don’t allow a lot of misconduct to touch me. i have a lot of confidence in my abilities and with that being said not many people come at my crazy. plus, i am super friendly and approachable so no one really bothers me much anyways. one quote that stood out to me from that week was, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others” (hogan). this rings true because you have to live your life for you, doing the things that make you happy and allow you to grow into a better person. and the same goes for when making new friends. week 9 also touched on not trying to find friends to replicate your old ones. just make new friends completely and let the relationships flow with no comparison to the old friends. week 10 touched on encountering brokenness and i just want to talk about how on summer walker’s new album, ciara had a prayer at the end of the album where she said “i’m broken but i’m beautifully broken” and that rings true for a lot of people especially after experiencing the downs of life. ciara’s quote also pairs really well with the kintsugi where people break pottery and repair it with gold. that right there is super healing to anyone who’s ever felt broken. week 10 also touched on systemic racism and that was traumatic to read about because it is embossing and it did not make me feel good. being a super minority (a woman, black and latina) the cards are stacked against me to the highest degree but that does not stop me from succeeding. my mom always told me from a young age that i was destined for greatness. week 11 focused more on encountering community and on a larger scale, everyone is a part of each other’s community. then within the large community there are millions of smaller communities. i have my dorm community, my community from school, from home etc.. all of those communities are helping shape me into a better person. i want to add this quote right now: “suffering lets our ‘hearts break open’ enough to hold both a vision of hope and the reality of resistance without tightening like a fist” (thirteen). i agree to some extent but at the same time, i just really don’t feel like life should be super hard all the time. why must we endure hard times to experience good times? i just want to live an easy life with minimal problems. i feel like if you have some empathy and kindness in your heart then you will be able to hold both a vision of hope and the reality of resistance without tightening like a fist. i just don’t understand why everyone has to endure some type of struggle that impacts their life and alters their way of thinking and all that jazz. i crave a life of easy days and peace. week 12 hit on the topics of encountering hope. i still don't know what it means to live and grow in hope but maybe one day i will… fingers crossed. i did pose a question that week asking how hopeless people find hope and i'm still curious to find the answer because i feel like for the most part. you’re either hopeful or you're not. most of the people in my life are hopeful so guess that's why i’m so optimistic about everything. when looking back on the past several weeks of moreau and i have encountered hope, community and brokenness. i firmly believe that all three work together like a holy trinity to keep you on your toes about life. sometimes when you’re feeling broken you might also feel hopeless and you'll have to lean on your community for support. that was just one example on how all three rely on each other. having identified what i encountered, i think i'll respond by continuing to be a good person who just wants to grow as an individual. at the end of the day, i think the biggest lesson i have learned in moreau this semester is to just be vulnerable and from that so many doors will open and continue to open by simply being my most authentic self. i have also realized that over the semester, my priorities have changed a little. i value my personal time so much more nowadays. i think that is because i only have such a limited amount of personal time in college with having to live with a roommate and managing classes and social settings that when i can get that moment to myself, i cherish it more than anything. something that has gotten more complex over the semester for me is juggling my academic, social and personal life because i go to school and sleep in the same place so for my brain to understand that concept is taking longer than expected to adjust fully. in high school, i went to school in my family car and went home everyday. here, i walk to school which is across the street from where i brush my teeth and do my laundry. lasty, i also just want to give my personal opinion on how i feel like the moreau lessons have gotten more and more abstract but not necessarily in a good way. i feel like they have decreased in impact and value. whoever made the second half of the semester curriculum got lazy and did not even try with the names of the lessons. it just looks thrown together. the first half of the semester’s content hasd substance and was thought provoking. second semester content.. not so much. i hope the second semester of moreau is as engaging as the first half of the first semester. moreno father kevin integration assignment 2 november 21, 2021 your broken pieces can mend others the world that i want to move with my life is the one where assistance comes to those who have the most trouble accessing it. i was made to work for others in a way to become a source of help and inspiration. i have always wanted to be in the neurology field and really want to help others the same way that i received medical help a couple of years ago. knowing the disadvantages of some groups of people not only around the world but in the us itself, i believe having more accessible means of health services is crucial. i know i was very fortunate and privileged to be in this country where i could have such fast and easy access to medical assistance, unlike so many others. i want to live to make a difference, even if it’s just for one person. the world today faces many challenges that we should all be working together to fix, but it all starts within us. the wesley theological seminary commencement (week 10) brings up that the only way to respond to the challenges of the world of today’s society is by examining the temptations in our hearts first, which will take care of the ugly in the world. based on catholics beliefs, it is up to the privileged to pick up the pieces of a broken society and help those who cannot help themselves. we are all created in the image and likeness of godimago deiand need to show that we can help one another without showing any concern over each other’s differences. for this reason, i believe it is truly important to use the gifts that i have, as well as privileges in terms of education, to one day be able to create an impact for someone else. when i encounter hard times, i want to learn how to be persistent and find satisfaction in knowing that i have tried my hardest, rather than in trying to achieve whatever idea of perfection i have. my whole life, i have always been used to academics reflecting all the hard work that i have put in, but i have learned this is not the case ever since coming to college and i know it will be the case for the rest of my life. having a set suppersition of the future and not being able to meet those expectations is something that i know cannot come from outside influences other than myself. in the article, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, it is written, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” (hogan, week 9). instead of trying to live a life of perfection, i want to live a life driven by my goals but knowing that i am trying my best to do what i canand even if it doesn't go as i wanted to, is okay. i have learned that being proud of the growth that i have to go through is just as valuable, or even more, than the mere outcome. i know that there will be hardships along any journey in life but without those experiences, there is no way of being able to appreciate the good ones. this can be seen in the way that the women used the kintsugi workshop to heal: ”... their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing… it allows you to grow and expand and you get to put your heart back together” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop, week 10). by turning the broken pieces of ourselves that we carry as burdens into something that we can like, we are able to instead look at these misfortune events in our life as instances that have turned us into who we are. everyone carries broken parts of themselves, but it is in how we let these pieces mold us that truly will impact our characters and the way we carry ourselves for the rest of our lives. it has always been important to me to help others; i want to use the hard experiences of my lifethe broken piecesto help others mend their own pieces. giving part of ourselves to other people is one of the most selfless things somebody can do and health being such an important interest of mine is why i want to pursue a career in this field. this semester, i discovered that i am not always going to be at the top out of my class academically-wise. coming to notre dame with such an instilled mindset of perfection not only challenged me academically but also in my self-confidence when it comes to comparing myself to those who seem “smarter” than me. yet, i have come to realize that everyone might be struggling and it’s something that i fail to see. as long as i am trying my hardest and asking for help from others, i can see that it is enough. i have also found the importance of having friendsthe right friendsthat see you for you and love you no matter what. parker j. palmer (week 11) states, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally”. i had never found a group of girls that i connected with so fast as i did with my friend group at mcglinn hall. i know not to take them for granted since i was so lucky to have found such amazing people so fast. furthermore, i have also found to have strengthened my faith while in my first semester here at notre dame. my faith and trust in god have to be my ultimate lever. i have found immense peace and comfort trusting god and his plan for my life. i know that by having him be my main focus in life, anything that happens, even if not according to my plan, is the right thing that was supposed to happen. works cited higan, julia. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto, grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. palmer, parker j. “thirteen ways of looking at community.” center for courage and renewal, 1998, couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. “wesley theological seminary commencement.” president nd, 7 may 2012, president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/. “women find healing through kintsugi workshop.” grotto, grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ . my connections with people and why they matter i believe that the most important thing i am searching for in life is relationships with others that grow by showing courage through being vulnerable. these are difficult emotions for me and humans to show, which is why they are praiseworthy. doing something you are not comfortable with shows that you care, and that you are willing to make the effort to go outside of your comfort zone. this specifically applies to connections with other people, and as social worker brene brown puts it, “by the time you’re a social worker for 10 years, what you realize is that connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” ("the power of vulnerability" by brene brown – moreau fye week one). speaking on my own personal experience, i have always been a really introverted person. in high school, i always felt uncomfortable talking to people, which made it somewhat difficult for me to build connections. now that i am here in college, i have worked on going outside of my comfort zone, which has helped me to better understand just how important it is to build and foster complex relationships with other people in my community. following that idea of building positive relationships with others, it is important to realize when you are in a toxic or harmful relationship that does not better yourself, but instead makes yourself worse. everyone at some point in their life has had some sort of relationship that was not a positive experience for them, for one reason or another. it is important to realize how “people in healthy relationships respect each other. they can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. they trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence.” ("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships", the red flag campaign – moreau fye week four). positive, healthy relationships are a two way street, and both people must be in agreement about how to build and foster these positive relationships with each other. without that mutual understanding, we find things we don’t want. i believe that to truly know oneself, one must first learn to know others. based on my experience and the knowledge i have gained about connections with other people, i have realized just how important it is to know oneself as well. this was a process that has taken many years, and to this day is not complete, and i do not expect it to ever really be complete. however, learning about myself, and accepting what i truly feel is something important that has been learned over the things i have experienced through all my life. more on that later. when building yourself and discerning the way you want to live your life, the most important part is building not what you think other people want to see, it is being yourself, and that “you go into yourself, you find the sin… …you fight that sin… …then a depth of character is constructed.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). once you realize how you can connect with people in a positive way, you will be able to find a way in which you can grow your self to what you truly want to be. i believe that my own personal experiences from the past are the single most valuable things that not only shape who i am, but also are the most valuable things i can offer other people. building on the importance of connections i can form with other people, what i have experienced in the past is so important to me. the hardships, pleasures, all of it has impacted me. and out of everything, one of the things i have discovered since coming to notre dame was how important https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim time spent with other people really is. carla harris, in her speech to the graduating class last year, mentioned how important time was, and how valuable it is for us. time is something we can never get back, unlike material goods and items. (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). in high school, i cared so much about my schoolwork and my grades that i typically neglected spending time with other people and isolated myself a lot for those reasons. but since coming to college, i have worked to change this a lot. the experiences i have with other people build up my life in that way, which is really valuable. what really feels satisfying to me is not what i have on paper, but it is what i have in my heart, as those relationships are so valuable to me. influences and perspectives are both things that i believe also shape me, but these are more fundamental to my core than the above examples. these are things that i truly believe, and have learned from a young age. the i am from poems ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six) were important in recognizing those things which had an influence on me. by realizing where my core beliefs come from, i can start to understand what my core beliefs are and where they come from. this is where the ideas of stories comes into play. by discussing stories with other people, you can build connections with those people and form valuable relationships. the danger of this however, is the bias that can form from these things. there are a lot of situations in the world today where we see these problems, and it is important as an individual of a very complex and diverse society to keep these things in mind. in adichie’s video about how it is irresponsible to not consider all sides of a story and what that means, we can see just how important it is to recognize these things. ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). this is important when conversing with other people, as communicating effectively and building those relationships that i find so important require understanding of the other person’s experiences, and this is the best way to start. at the end of all of this, and my very most core beliefs are that i believe in god. faith is what wraps all of someone’s life together, and it is what sums up their beliefs and their experiences together. for me, faith has always been something that i have kept in the back of my mind when making decisions and deciding how to live my life. as someone who was raised catholic, while i was never that involved in my faith, the catholic morals and teachings were things that were important to me and help me to this day to make decisions that can help me live my life. one of the important things that relates to my faith is how it helps keep me going when times are tough, like fr. pete discussed in his video about the role of faith. (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick – moreau fye week 3). all in all, what matters to me is the bonds and connections i build with other people. this is done in multiple ways, but the bottom line is that it is formed by how i relate to them with my experiences and beliefs from the past. i believe that that is the most important thing a person can experience in their lives. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry moreau integration 4 my mission to restate, my personal mission statement is: i am dedicated to helping others, through a variety of ways. it is my goal to cultivate my character, and inhibit selflessness, compassion, and love for those around me. i value giving back to my community, whether it be through community service or other manners. i strive to achieve future success, dedicating myself to my studies, so that i will have the means to help others in the future. i aspire to seek new passions and career aspirations through my higher education. i hope to be enlightened by a variety of different viewpoints, which will help me grow in awareness and understanding of the society that i am a part of. i am also passionate about educating myself on larger social issues, as i hope that injustice and hatred will stop plaguing our society. on a smaller scale, i value spreading happiness to those around me. it is important to me that i do small acts of kindness for my friends and family as a way to show my appreciation for them. likewise, personally i value taking time to myself, so i can contemplate my thoughts and feelings as i make decisions for my future. ultimately, i hope to seek personal fulfillment through the accomplishment of my goals. this course has taught me many valuable lessons to achieve these goals in my mission statement. first, this course has emphasized the fact that we live in a very interconnected world, so we must show concern for the wellbeing of those around us. pope francis reinforced this idea when he said, “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone. we don’t think about it often, but everything is connected, and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week 7). we must live in a mutually supportive society in order to fully strive, which is why part of my mission is to give back to my community and to be aware of the societal issues that require change. one way to show concern for those around us is through solidarity. we can put solidarity into practice through accompaniment, as is shown in steve reifenberg’s article when it says, “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward. ‘to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard,’ gutiérrez said” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). caring for those around us and being willing to help them –whether through accompaniment or different means– can better our society and help those in need, which is why it is an integral part of my personal mission. additionally, this course has taught me to identify my passions and educate myself on them. coming to college, most people focus solely on their major, however i’ve learned that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). we can have broader passions in life, and they can be totally unrelated to our major. father hesburgh exemplified this, as he was “someone who was totally committed to his country, his faith, and to what was right” ("hesburgh" moreau fye week 2). he was passionate about many different things, including https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145505 his faith and racial justice. part of my mission statement includes exploring and finding my passions, though there are some matters that i already take interest in. for example, when i talked to my mom for the week 5 interview, she said that she believed that equality for everyone regardless of their race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc is something that i’m passionate about (moreau fye week 5). this is a concept that we have talked a lot about this semester. we have discussed that “our socialization renders us racially illiterate. when you add a lack of humility to that illiteracy (because we don’t know what we don’t know), you get the break-down we so often see when trying to engage white people in meaningful conversations about race” ("why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism" by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). getting better education about racial relations and gaining different perspectives about racial struggles is something that i am really focused on moving forward, and it is an important part of my mission statement. coming to notre dame, i experienced a more diverse population than was in my hometown and i hope to surround myself with more diversity even after college. the importance of diversity is illustrated by dean g. marcus cole when he said, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). part of my mission statement is to experience and understand many different viewpoints, which is why diversity is something that is so important to me. lastly this class has taught me important lessons about self reflection which will help me achieve my goals. we started off the semester discussing the purpose of self reflection, which is that it “helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). we discussed many different types of self reflection, and the dangers of self reflection. for example, introspection can be dangerous as “introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich phdmoreau fye week 6). likewise, being in an echo chamber can cloud our self reflection. dr. paul blaschko described that “we need to take a step back and reorient ourselves. we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well-thought-out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). if we are not getting a variety of perspectives, our own self reflection is useless. however, one beneficial form of self reflection is the “concept [of] intentionally [thinking] about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). these different dangers and benefits of self reflection will be extremely helpful knowledge to know as i move forward. in order to achieve the goals of my mission https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145485 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145607 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145607 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html statement, i need to be self aware and reflect on my progress, which i am equipt to do with this knowledge. donata carinato integration 2 donata carinato moreau first year experience integration 2 over the course of my time thus far at notre dame, and in moreau, i have been able to look closer at my feelings and ideas regarding certain topics. some topics were daunting at first, or seemed very grey and blurry, however with time and through looking at resources they clarified. on the other hand, some topics started off straightforward but proved to be more complex the more time spent on them. additionally, some topics were difficult to face because of the emotional attachments that accompanied them, yet time spent on them showed to be valuable and helped me to grow and heal. a lot of important questions were posed this semester, and many of them have recently been centered on community, and the whole of the notre dame student body, or greater human population. one question i looked at week 11 was “when the ideas of community, oppression, and multiple stories all feel very large and overwhelming, what is a good way to think about them and acknowledge them?”. by looking at the different resources and stories, i was able to see that community is important, but learning to care about everyone in the community and fostering the best community possible comes from listening to the individuals, and respecting them. as the video said, “understanding it begins with listening. every story is a testament of personal truth. and each must be heard as part of the larger story” (with voices true by the klau center archive on racemoreau fye week 11). looking at the larger community without considering the individuals that make it up can lead to marginalizing and generalizing, and can be an overwhelming way of creating a community. by starting small and listening to every individual, the community will be better equipped to foster respect and strong relationships. https://voicestrue.nd.edu community also connects to some of the other questions asked, including how to remain hopeful and deal with brokenness. both of these questions had very complex answers, but they also both connected to being able to lean on others and find strength in the community. surviving and thriving in isolation is much more difficult than surviving and thriving surrounded by people who love and support you, and sometimes the best way to fight against the biggest obstacles is to ask others to fight with you. community was also an important part to answering the question, “how can i deal with feeling unworthy and overwhelmed when it comes to school, and what do i do if i am feeling alone about those thoughts as well?” since coming to campus, it has been difficult to adjust while also meeting tons of new people. on top of that, balancing a new school curriculum and way of learning. all of this leads to many feelings of imposter syndrome and feeling like i don't belong or fit in. one of the greatest takeaways from learning about imposter syndrome was, “feelings of imposterism aren't restricted to highly skilled individuals either; everyone is susceptible to a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we doubt ourselves privately, but believe we are alone in thinking that way, because no one else voices their doubts” (what is imposter syndrome?, elizabeth coxmoreau fye week 9). one of the biggest steps to fighting obstacles like imposter syndrome and feelings of inadequacy is to realize that everyone is in the same boat. so many individuals experience these feelings, and talking about them can help everyone to realize they do belong, and they are doing an amazing job by just doing their best. when i started actually talking to my friends about my feelings of inadequacy was when i felt the most like i actually did fit in and belonged at this school, and i believe they felt the same. looking for support through the community again helps to battle these feelings and anxieties, and will make the whole of the community stronger as a result. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo also through my time in moreau this semester, especially very recently, some ideas have become much more clear and developed into more complex understandings. for example, the idea of hope, which can be so abstract and grey, became much more understandable after considering the question, “how can i keep up hope when things feel very hopeless, and there is nothing to grab hold of?”. hope is not always easy to keep up, but it is an important part to moving through life and moving through it enjoyably and successfully. after looking through the articles, i was struck by the line in the screwtape letters, “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty.” (the screwtape letters, c.s. lewismoreau fye week 12). while the screwtape letters have a certain amount of satire and irony in them, this statement is very important to the human condition. this sentence points out the facts of life, and one of the hopeful facts in my opinionnothing is unchanging. life is constantly in a state of dynamic change, so no matter how hopeless and dark things can get, they cannot remain that way forever, and there is always hope that things will change for the better. my favorite lesson from the second half of the semester, and the one that has stuck with me the most, has been encountering brokenness. i think every person has some level of brokenness within themsomething they are working through or working to improve, or something they struggle to remember. i certainly have my own level of brokenness, and i tried to avoid thinking about it, and was somewhat ashamed of it. in week 10, i learned about the beauty of brokenness. from the video of the kintsugi workshop, i learned, “the things that they've experienced, good the bad the ugly, all of that, it has made them this beautiful dynamic interesting person that they are today and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop, grottomoreau fye week 10). the healing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192658?module_item_id=109471 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ these women did, taking broken things (both physically and within themselves) and making them shimmer and glow with beauty, gave me the strength needed to realize i too am beautiful not despite my experiences, but because of them, and because of the strong and complex person i have become by going through them. the pottery was not just fixed, it was transformed into something arguably better than it was before, just as each of us are better for the experiences we have faced and learned through. intergration 2 viggiano 1 catherine wagner moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 michael’s moreau exploration of new ideas and reflection through my moreau journey, i challenged many of my previous beliefs through new information provided and in-class discussions. i believe challenging my views on various topics is essential because, with the latest knowledge, you can either reaffirm and strengthen your belief or change your mind as you see the idea in a new way. this was apparent through each of the last four weeks of moreau and helped me grow as both a student and person. during week 9, i encountered examining the uneasy feelings that come with college. when transitioning from high school to university, we are faced with all new challenges. in one of the texts we read, julian hogan stated, “additionally, when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julian hogan moreau fye week nine). she explained that when we create our goals based on what others expect, we are trying to achieve what they want and not what we truly want. in class, we discussed the new stresses that come with college, like not fulfilling the expectations of others and not feeling like you belong. i came into college to get a’s in all of my classes, and i believed it would be achievable if i worked hard enough. however, i realized classes were a lot harder than i expected through the first semester as i struggled in a few. i started feeling like maybe i didn’t belong here and would be disappointing my parents if i didn’t get that perfect gpa. after the class discussion, i found that i wasn’t the only one struggling with this. i now see that everyone goes through these https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ viggiano 2 struggles, and talking about them with others is a great way to realize this. after week 9, i found it necessary to set my own goals that wouldn’t overwhelm me and block out what others expect me to do. also, i learned that even if i don’t achieve these goals, that if i worked hard and put my best foot forward, that it was okay. during week 10, i encountered the challenges that society faces with brokenness and division. we've always have had problems in society when it comes to brokenness and division, but, today more than ever, it is more prevalent. we live in a community with many relevant social injustice issues and a harsh political divide. therefore, we must look for a way in which we could solve and aid these issues. one quote that embodies this was from father jenkins, "both sides call for change, but each believes it's the other side that must change" ("wesley theological seminary commencement" by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). this quote shows that we find more wrong with the opposing side than the topic of disagreement. if, as a society, we could change this narrative and focus more on solving problems than fighting with each other, we could change for the better. in class, we discussed ways in which we can heal this brokenness. the point that stuck with me the most was when we talked about the art of kintsugi. one person brought up how certain things that are broken and put back together are stronger than what they were before they were broken. in the words of kelly clarkson, "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger." that was a reassuring point for me because it is hard to see the world's state right now. thinking that maybe with healing, we can be in a better place than we were before all these problems makes me optimistic for the future. one question i asked myself this week was how i could help in this process of healing? i believe that i can influence others to learn about current social issues in an unbiased political way. if i don't https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ viggiano 3 associate the predicament with either political side, it would be less controversial, and with this, we can work to find change in this world. during week 11, i encountered the benefits of learning about other communities. i always knew how important it was for me to diversify myself about experiencing new communities; however, i never experienced so many different communities until i got to notre dame. professor agustin fuentes states, "exposure and access to different viewpoints & life experiences offer insight and changes biases" ("diversity matters" by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). this quote expresses the importance of learning from others. in class, we talked about how at notre dame, we will encounter various communities. if we take time to educate ourselves about these groups' cultures, traditions, and beliefs, we can come to appreciate them even more. the one thing that i thought was more "black and white" and now more ambiguous is how many groups there are. in class, we talked not just about ethnicity, but beliefs, socio-economic statuses, and more. these factors apply to all people, which means there are more subdivided groups than i thought. however, i feel that we don't have to classify everyone we meet. i don't believe that we have to know someone's socio-economic status to learn what they think and feel as a person. overall, the week gave me more clarity on learning about other communities but more uncertainty about classifying people. during week 12, i encountered experiencing and finding hope even in tough times. i have always found hope in looking ahead to the future. i have goals that i want to achieve, and i experience hope by aiming to work hard now to achieve them. however, when times get rough, it blurs your vision, and it becomes more challenging to see the light at the end of the tunnel. when i came to notre dame, i ended up finding hope in a place where i would never expect. james b king states, "striving for completeness means spending one's life as a citizen of this https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 viggiano 4 world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests" ("holy cross and christian education" by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). while in college, i found that i could find hope through my faith. i grew up as a catholic, but i never really went to church every week. since being here, i've been going to mass every week. i feel that the catholic traditions of notre dame have grown me closer to my relationship with god. now, i look to him for guidance through tough times in college. the week 12 work in moreau helped me realize how much my faith has transformed since being here. i can now clearly see that i will never lose hope in god, which will help guide me through my notre dame journey and beyond. at the end of my first semester moreau experience, i can look back and appreciate the class because every week brought a new topic to examine. i felt that i slowly better understood myself each week through the readings, videos, discussions, and assignments. i believe that i wouldn’t be as optimistic, knowledgeable, or curious about new ideas if i didn’t take this course. it was a great learning experience because taking the time to examine yourself as you are going through a significant transition can help it seem not as scary. thank you so much for facilitating the class and being such a great teacher! https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 1 december 2021 fr. kevin moreau fys the lever which moves clean water after spending this semester in the first-year engineering program, i plan to move forward with my studies of environmental engineering. this is so that i may use my knowledge and talents in the fields of science and math, as well as my love of the outdoors to help engineer a better world for tomorrow. as an environmental engineer, i hope to help design water infrastructure that can help bring clean water to everyone. this will help make the world a safer, more equitable place. this desire to help the world have clean water stems from my desire to help build a better global community. in week 11 of moreau, we read a text from the center for courage and renewal. in this text, authored by parker j palmer, we read “whether we know it or not, like it or not, honor it or not, we are embedded in community. whether we think of ourselves as biological creatures or spiritual beings or both, the truth remains: we were created in and for a complex ecology of relatedness, and without it we wither and die.” this speaks to an inherent part of being human; we are a collective race. we cannot survive in isolation, and we should work to help bring the longevity of the whole. by attempting to live in isolation, we not only harm ourselves, but we also harm the rest of humanity by failing to provide them with the gifts, talents and skills which can help work towards their benefit this begins to answer the question “what am i made for?”, but we are still missing a key element. in his 2012 commencement address to wesley theological seminary in washington dc, which we read in preparation for week 10, father jenkins says “love is the deepest human need. each human being has a deep spiritual, psychological, emotional longing for love. and not to get it injures us deeply.” this reflects a key component of my desire to bring clean water to the world. the feeling of love is just as important to a person’s flourishing as their need for water. for too long, some people have felt ignored and condemned to have a lower standard of living than that of their peers. unfortunately, these divisions frequently fall upon socioeconomic lines. by bringing clean water, i hope to be able to help dissolve the barriers which divide people from one another. thus, by satiating the human need for water, i am also helping to satiate the human need for love and affection. i hope that by helping to bring clean water to those in need of it, i can remind them that they do have a voice, and that they deserve basic dignity and respect just as much as the next person. for a while towards the beginning of the semester, i was unsure if engineering was going to be the lever which i used to bring positive change to the world. i did not know if i was worthy of the mantle and obligation of being an engineering student. i worried if i was smart enough and whether i was simply wasting my time. thankfully by fall break, those fears and worries mostly subsided, but i was reminded of my doubts wen we watched a ted-ed video titled “what is imposter syndrome?” in week 9 of moreau. i had heard of imposter syndrome before, but never connected that what i was experiencing fell under its definition. the video ended with the statements “you have talent, you are capable, and you belong.” this reminded me that i can succeed in studying environmental engineering. later, while at a career development presentation for my engineering class, the presenter said, “the hardest thing you will probably have to do in life is to get accepted to notre dame.” this reminded me that i had already done the hard work of building a foundation on which i can build more knowledge. this foundation is not just math and science, but also a human desire to love and improve the world. in week 12, we prepared a set of rules for life. these rules are to govern me and my actions so that i may act deliberately and with purpose towards my desired ends. two of my rules were “always be kind” and “think before you act.” i hope that these rules help guide me to live a life in which i can help others. i consider kindness to be a precursor to the love which father jenkins described in his commencement address. without first being kind to everyone that we meet, we cannot truly come to love them. additionally, i consider thinking before action to be essential to living a disciplined, contemplative life of action. we must first ensure that the goals which we set for ourselves are realistic and possible. additionally, we must ensure that the causes which motivate us are worthwhile. by thinking before acting, we can ensure that our efforts will eventually bear fruit and we are not working for nothing overall, i hope to use my education in environmental engineering from notre dame to help bring equity and sustainability to the world’s water crisis. this goal cannot be achieved through math and science alone. it requires a human desire to do good which only a diverse curriculum, like that of notre dame, can inspire. additionally, notre dame provides the resources which can help make my goals a reality. i hope to make my education from the university of notre dame the lever i use to help move the world by providing clean water to all those in need. this will not only improve the world, but also improve me by helping to give me meaning through working to benefit the lives of others. i feel that if everyone makes helping others a main aspect of their lives, the collective humanity can make the world better. intergeration 1 moreau an internal software update root belief: i believe that i am only able to grow if i truly am vulnerable which is the first step in loving yourself i believe it is truly tough to be vulnerable because people are not content with themselves. in today’s day and age, it is hard to be vulnerable because you put that wall up. it truly is difficult to love yourself with social media. social media allows for people to see a certain perssona online and if someone is not on par with that it leaves many insecurities and is makes it impossible to fully love themselves. this makes the wall even bigger and creates a nation of people not content with their true selves. in the (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) brown talks about the courage to be imperfect allows for folks to be their most authentic self. since they are okay without being perfect they can truly love themselves. these people who are so content with themselves can completely drop their mask “aka fake persona” can truly make deep connections and be compassionate. the direct reason why people can make connections and show compassion is that they are authentic. self-love is such a powerful and overlooked thing. it changes the mindset an individual can have which is all that it takes to transcend life. root belief: i believe that i am constantly searching for the truest form of myself. in life we are constantly controlled by fear and given certain standards on how we should live. we are constantly maturing and growing up. as adolescents, we truly don’t care and act freely but the older you get the harder it is to be you. the older you get the more you care about what other people think about you. people change how they act to “fit in” and care more about how others perceive them than being true to themselves. high school is the place a lot of this happens and kids are walking on eggshells so they can be illustrated as cool. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) the video shines a light on how society works. in today's day and age people get so hung up on earthly things, that they lose sight of what is truly important. we put too much emphasis on this life and forgot how small a percentage this life is in the grand scheme of things. our true goal should be to live forever in eternal heaven. adam 1 lives for worldly desires a l and be good for wrong intentions. adam ii wants us to embody certain moral qualities not only to do good but to a good cause, we want to not cause we have to. to conclude, the most important thing in life should be to be a good moral person and to do so with the right intentions. the final goal has always been when we are judged to live with god forever and that is all. root belief: i believe that is important to pursue faith https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim an internal software update i believe this because my whole life i have blindly gone to catholic school because that is what my parents told me to do. i always knew i wanted to go to catholic school but never truly why. i went on kairos, a strong religious retreat and thought that was enough to fully ignite my love for god. in the end, i was wrong and it didn’t ignite the flame i was looking for. i still went to mass and god was in my life but i wasn’t super excited about it all the time. when i got into the gateway program associated with notre dame i was excited to be enwrapped in catholic community. i had my fingers crossed this was the shove i needed to be excited about god. i needed to notre dame’s catholic values and sense of community to truly allow me to see how exciting it truly can be. i can say without a doubt the environment here and the harmonious love for god have given me that extra shove. in (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3), the video talks about how important the journey of self-discovery is. life is an accumulation of events and experiencing influencing who you truly are. how many high schoolers have felt like life is pointless just because they haven't found out who they truly are. self-discovery is tough and it’s supposed to be that way but god has a plan for us. all life is a bunch of lows and highs that are checkpoints in the grand scheme of things. every checkpoint is just one more step closer to what god intends us to be. root belief: i belief that my community should address all forms of abuse in all forms of life abuse is present. there are so many types, physical, verbal, manipulation. some forms like verbal and manipulation truly aren't talked about as much as they should be. i believe this because i have seen it actually happen in real life. kids being told they aren’t good enough in a sport or school, spouses yelling at each other, people manipulating others and evidently making that person's life worse. i think communities need to stress that obviously physical abuse is very evident and the other types need more time in the spotlight. this truly could help a lot of people because they think their life are normal and they are miserable just because. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship”by oliver taylor moreau fye week fourth) a part of the article talked about fake friends and red flags to see if your friend is fake. the major one that stuck out to me was you notice your friend is taking more than giving. in biology, relationships can either be commensalism or parasitic. this is what i think of is both parties benefiting from each other or is one party just taking. you can really see this when a friend is never there for you but if you need them they are just aren’t existent. i have seen this happen with other people; having toxic friends is terrible and can beat a person down. overall a toxic friend can be abusive in life. we need to know when to get out. it is so paramount to understand the difference between a real and fake friend. i believe that it is important to take any opportunity that you may be interested in. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ an internal software update saying yes to an unfamiliar opportunity is something that i have always found to be challenging in that sense that failure seems so likely. i think the reason for this is because i have, for much of my life, looked at failure in an entirely negative light. failure to me meant that i had come up short, that i was not good enough. but failure shouldn’t be looked at in this way, instead, failure should be a learning experience. carla harris said, “failure always brings you a gift. and that gift is called experience. now you know how to do it better. now you know how to do it differently. now you know how to do it successfully.” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5) now that i am in college, i want to embrace new opportunities, and more importantly, i want to embrace the failure that may come with these experiences. i have no reason to fear failure, i only have knowledge to gain. i believe that it is important to look back on your youth and let yourself grow when writing my “where from poem. i really touched on how big family was but also the hardships in my life. i have seen the bad i have done and the good. it scares me to notice how close i am to being a full adult and to be done growing. that poem truly scared me in the fact of my anxiety has not really got any better. it also shined a light on the good in my life and how lucky i am. i really am happy i did that assignment. hopeful next time i could make it rhyme. root belief: i believe that i pursue the truth by looking for the whole truth in life and not the single story this belief truly challenges my actions with thinking. i really have thought about how many times has information been corrupted before getting to me. my thought process now truly tries to take all information i hear with a grain of salt. i give everything in my lifetime before i truly make a judgment on it and that is what i am most happy about. ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) the ideology that i saw came out of the video most was generalizations and stereotypes. in the world today there are so many preconceived notions about people and places that just aren’t fully true. it makes you think about how much information in life does not circulate the full truth. the main thing this video did for me was give me a new perspective; allowing me to try to find the whole story before assuming anything. this allows you to see the world in a new viewpoint seeing less hate. a lot of times in the news in third world countries you hear about all the bad but there actually is good. i’m so thankful for this video. it has given me the wisdom to truly shine a light on the whole truth and not just one side of it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&feature=youtu.be https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreno father kevin moreau october 15, 2021 comparison in a world of one i believe that i grow by experiencing the hardships of life in a way to learn from them rather than to let them bring me down. having to leave a family that i have been close to all my life was something that i found harder than imagined. but this only taught me that it was my time to grow up and that it is better to learn it now at a place that’ll help to guide me in the right direction. being from mexico and living in boston my entire life also created a sense of belonging to two places at the same time yet never being 100% from either place. it is easy for people to assume and to judge things about yourself because they do not know you at allthey do not know the other part of your life that they are so unfamiliar with. this brings me to how chimamanda ngozi adichie herself tells the difficulty of having a single story that is not told the way it is supposed to be. she emphasizes that “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity . . . it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this along with the article of “how to think about ‘implicit bias’”, showed me that i also have these stereotypes engraved in me and it is because of the stories that keep being passed on from generations to generations, sometimes reinforcing a story that is not the real one. we start to associate things with these stories and stereotypes and it is hard for people to even realize the truth at one point. the real way to pursue the truth is by, when telling stories of others, tell a definitive storyone that shows the truth. moreover, i believe that i forge lifelong friendships and relationships by seeking people who seek the best for me. i became extremely lucky to find girls in mcglinn hall who i believe will be by my side for the rest of my life. we have shared more moments than with anybody in high school and they make me feel loved for who i am. carla harris’ speech encaptures the importance of having people that will reflect your own character by your side. “it is what you do for others that counts” (“notre dame commencement 2021” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i learned that sometimes, you have to sacrifice your time, which is something that is so valuable here as a student, to help a friend in need. for that reason, i feel comfortable with those around me, and accepted by them. at notre dame, i have seen everyone trying to help each other succeed rather than compete. i truly believe that it is not a place where anyone can not fit in. by having others on your side, anyone can truly become the person they want to be. the only way to actually succeed is by cultivating our characters alongside others in order to flourish. i believe that i am searching for what makes me feel particular in a community where everyone is the best. having come from a small high school and graduated as the valedictorian, i always felt like excelling in academics was something unique to myself. coming to a university where everyone is of the same academic level, creates only more comparison rather than unison in my eyes. this can parallel what dr. brown mentions how the distinction of how our own sense of worthiness has the ability to direct our entire path: “there was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it: that was the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe that they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau week 1). i learned that i need to believe within myself that i am worthy of my place at this university, no matter how much better i think the rest of the students are. struggling in academics this first half of the semester has revealed my lack of patience with myself when it comes to grades that don’t meet my expectations. but it is by admitting that i need help and then asking for it, that i will be able to overcome the struggle itself. conclusively, i believe that i pursue truth in finding what truly matters in this lifetime—and that is not success in the materialistic world. as brooks states in his comparison of adam i and adam ii as human nature: “nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore we must be saved by hope. nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in an immediate context of history; therefore we must be saved by faith.” (“david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau week two). it is more important to focus on the internal goals and hopes and build upon these before focusing on the successes in society. relating to father pete mccormick’s analogy with the knots because every knot is so different from one another and it isn’t until you have that one, that you will be able to actually gain something from the experience (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick moreau week 3). we don’t need to live up to whatever our thoughts about being good christians and catholics are. as long as we put love, faith, and hope first, our lighting will be proper for us to see god before all else. our faith builds our framework and guides us through life as best as possible. while academics seem to play the most prominent role here at notre dame, finding will in god’s grace is the foundation for everything that we do. i found it really important to set a time for each day as a way to listen to what he wants me to do rather than focusing so much on myself. in keeping god first, we will be directed to what we truly are meant to do. works cited “the danger of a single story | chimamanda ngozi adichie.” youtube, youtu.be/d9ihs241zeg. “david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” youtube, youtu.be/mllwteapqim. “notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address.” youtube, youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4. “the power of vulnerability.” youtube, the power of vulnerability | brené brown | tedxhouston. “the role of faith in our story.” youtube, youtu.be/lczmeqwwoi gottemoller professor whittington moreau fye64 3 december 2021 authentically nd: a first-year reflection nearly four months ago, i sat in the back seat of my parent’s car as we drove by cream colored buildings and welcome week committees of screaming students waving neon signs and excitedly running up and down the sidewalks of north quad. i desperately wanted to freeze time so that i didn’t have to get out of the car, unpack my suitcases, meet hundreds of new people, and begin my new life. i didn’t know what i would encounter, but i thought it couldn’t be any more loving or accepting than my family. here, i have encountered disappointed expectations, brokenness, and imperfection. here, i have experienced love, acceptance, and community. i have responded with varying emotions, but most importantly i have responded by meeting every challenge which has been thrown at me. i spent the majority of the first half of this semester counting down the days until i would be back at home. i just had to make it until fall break and then everything would start looking up. what i did not realize is that the beginning of my fall break was accompanied with the release of midterm grades. when i first received the email from the registrar, i was filled with immediate apprehension. this was the first grade i received for some of my classes and encountering this clear signal of how successful my first few weeks had been seemed daunting. finally, i built up the courage to look at my grades and although all of them were good, i found myself being disappointed. i had not expected to be challenged at notre dame and my grades reflected the fact that i was indeed being challenged. after spending a few days reflecting on the first half of my semester, i realized that my expectations for perfection had robbed me of the opportunity to be proud of my accomplishments. though i encountered disappointment, i found myself following the advice of julia hogan who suggested that, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, by julia hogan, moreau fye week 9) throughout the final weeks of this semester and in the rest of my college career, i hope to avoid creating expectations and simply practice being proud of myself. some of the things that i encountered in my first semester were expected. i expected to be lonely and tired and homesick, but i wasn’t expecting to encounter brokenness. in my courses, we talked about the brokenness of the catholic church, american government, and the brokenness of generations of oppressed peoples. i felt weighed down by all this brokenness and pain, but i didn’t know how to identify the problem i was facing. in week ten of this semester, our section pondered the theme of “encountering brokenness.” finally, i found a name for what i was facingbrokenness. within that module, we not only learned about brokenness, but we were taught how to react to it. with the help of this moreau course, i learned to take time to ponder the brokenness of the world as the students of kintsugi do. “they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — have made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop,” by kirsten helgeson, moreau fye week 10) encountering brokenness in the beauty of notre dame was scary, but the realization that the world is better and stronger for being broken has taught me to see my life differently. not everything i encountered was negative. i also encountered success. i received unexpected good grades and made surprisingly good friendships and i learned that just as i share my defeats and disappointments with my community, i also must share my triumphs. i learned that “the self-sufficiency i feel in success is a mirage. i need community—and, if i open my heart, i have it.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community,” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week 11) i put this into practice by making a tradition of grabbing gelato from hagerty family cafe after psych exams with my friend maria. small traditions such as this have encouraged me to share my successes with my community at notre dame. although i expected to encounter opposing opinions in my time at college. i was confident that my anti-confrontational personality would help me to keep my distance from these conflicts. i was quickly proven wrong when i was challenged to write essays for comparative politics which accurately portrayed the counter arguments to all of my beliefs. notre dame has followed in the tradition of fr. moreau who wrote, “it was simply essential for the next generation of christians, including teachers and religious, to be conversant with modern theories and philosophies, even those they opposed.” (“holy cross and christian education,” by ndcampus ministry, moreau fye week 12) i learned that by critically addressing those who disagree with me, i can encounter truth and do so in a peaceful manner. encountering challenges, brokenness, success, and opposing opinions have all been part of my notre dame journey. through the help of my community and this course, i have learned how to react to all of these encounters in healthy ways. at notre dame, my community has driven me to share my successes and failures and it has challenged me to grapple with brokenness and conflicts. from the classroom to the dining hall, every step of my notre dame journey has harbored a new experience. the combination of negative and positive experiences which have characterized my first year journey have shaped who i am now. waking up every morning knowing that somehow i am a part of this institution which defines so many aspects of my life has been exciting and daunting. as i look ahead to these next four years, i hope that they will provide me with a more complete understanding of who i am and how i relate to this place i call home: notre dame. step one to loving others: love yourself i believe that feeling like you may never fully be enough may never change, but that is ok. upon coming to notre dame i was petrified that i would find no friends, that i would not be able to keep up with my peers, and that i would always feel alone. when i got here, i was fortunate that all of my assumptions were not true, but some of them were. one of the most intimidating things is going from being top of my class in high school to being at the same level as everybody here, because we were all at the top of our class. this is a huge eye opener because i once thought my accomplishments were so impressive, but now they only seem mediocre compared to the research, internships, projects, and more that everyone here seems to have done. elizabeth cox describes imposter syndrome and explains, “everyone is susceptible to a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). for once, she is able to explain that the feeling i have been experiencing is what everyone else around me also feels, but we are all too prideful to admit it. in reality, what i have done is incredibly impressive and i should not feel like i am not worthy of being proud of them in spite of what anyone else has done. it is actually healthier for me to stop minimizing and comparing myself to others because, at the end of the day, we all got into this institution for a specific reason and my feeling of not being enough is only holding me back. i believe that being broken is a strength, not a weakness. life has and will continue to bring me challenges and heartache. throughout my childhood i had to deal with family issues, mental health issues, and social issues that impaired my ability to do many things i have wanted to do. i was afraid to love because i thought i was too broken. i was afraid to praise myself out loud because i did not want someone to take that away from me. however, since coming to notre dame i feel like i finally have a fresh new start and the opportunity to leave my past behind (somewhat) and to be the person i always wanted to be. while my past will never truly leave me, i do not need to dwell on it. instead, i can choose to grow and come out stronger. this concept is symbolized through the kintusgi art form because it is a visual representation of accepting one’s brokenness and finding the beauty within all the chaos. in the video, “women find healing through kintsugi workshop,” the instructor kristen explains how without the piece being broken, it would never have the chance to become so beautiful in the end, which is precisely what more people need to understand. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto moreau fye week ten). ultimately, i will never truly be able to move forward unless i accept my past and embrace it. furthermore, i know that i will never be able to embrace my past unless i stop looking at it with such negativity and regret. i believe that not everyone needs to like me. too often i feel an intense need for everyone to like me because if even one person does not like me, i feel like no one does. regarding race, i know that our world has not evolved enough to ignore differences. it is terrible that i can be in a with my friends (a group of all white people) and feel out of place. it is disgusting that i have gotten looks of confusion being with my white father and sister (who is darker than i am). this reality has made me hate myself before because not only can i not help what i look like or who i choose to spend time with, but i also will never be able to change the minds of people who cannot help but stare. parker j. palmer once said “by 1975, i had come up with my definition of community: “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives.” by 1976, i had come up with my corollary to that definition: “and when that person moves away, someone else arises immediately to take his or her place.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this sad reality is something i need to finally accept. there are always going to be people who do not accept me and who will treat me differently, but i cannot let their ignorant thoughts make me believe i see myself as different. coming to this institution there is a lot of judgement whether we choose to admit it or not. there are the people who clearly come from more privileged families and others who came from less. there are people whose families are devoutly catholic and who believe each and every doctrine to a t, and others who are more liberal in their beliefs. these differences are incredibly frustrating and debilitating, but what i have learned thus far is that it is possible to find the people who love and accept me, so i need to find those people and allow myself to feel accepted. i believe that fear only holds me back. rev. james b. king once said “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). this quote focuses on the false idea that life is too scary and unknown, which pushes people to not take risks. but, this is only holding us all back. too often i see people, myself included, having desires and wants, but they do not go for them because they are either too afraid or they simply do not have the faith that it will work out. without going out of my comfort zone, i would have never ended up applying to such a good school, moving halfway across the country, and sitting here doing an assignment for the university of notre dame. if our predecessors never took risks our world and everything in it would not be the way it is today. i know that fear has held me back in the past and i know it won’t go away overnight, but i owe it to myself to at least try to take more risks. maybe that means joining a club or participating in an interesting project whatever it is, i will never know what good could come of it if i never try. integration 2 dr. vanessa chan moreau fye section 10 27 november 2021 encounters as catalysts for personal growth as we approach the end of the semester, reflecting on the past few months has allowed me to attain a greater perspective on the challenges that i’ve faced as a new college student, and i’ve been able to find gratitude for the tools that have helped me to navigate this time of my life. among the many lessons that i’ve learned here at notre dame so far, i have learned about the complexity of dissonance, brokenness, community, and hope, and i have seen how encountering these in my life can both challenge me and offer opportunities for growth. it is inevitable that a person will encounter some form of dissonance no matter what period of life that person is in. during the transition to university life, a time when one is completely uprooted from everything that is known or familiar, this is especially true. in class, we discussed the technical meaning of dissonance, the combination of clashing musical notes; when two elements don’t quite agree with each other. in college, as a person is trying to find their path, this dissonance is exhibited as we “try on” different careers, start down various paths, and discover that the journey of figuring out our lives isn’t quite so linear. one cause of the dissonance experienced by college students is the expectations of others. i know that, like many other young people, i’ve encountered this pressure to make my parents proud and to meet the expectations of friends and family members, but one article we read in class reminded me that, when you live to please others, “you aren’t living your own life –– you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). when i left home after telling everyone in my life what i intended my major and future career to be, i found myself tied to that statement as if it was a promise that i made rather than simply a guess as to where i’d end up. however, the truth of the matter is that of all the people in my life, i am the only one that has to follow through and actually live out the reality of my choices. i left home intending to obtain an engineering degree, and perhaps i will follow through with this decision, but my first few months of college have made me realize that i need to sit down and ask myself some difficult questions about what it is that i want. in the places where there is a dissonance between my own goals and the expectations of others, i need to prioritize living for myself. as i’ve grown up, i’ve come to recognize brokenness as a sort of omnipresent force. no one escapes life perfectly intact, but i think that it is up to us to decide whether we let our brokenness turn into hatred or into hope. for our in class discussion on brokenness, we read a piece by fr. john jenkins where he explained that “we have to accept for practical purposes that hatred is not out there. it is in here — ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week ten). when it comes to my own brokenness, i believe that a mark of my own maturing has been the recognition of the choice that comes with brokenness. in my bouts with cancer and the medical situations that followed, it at times felt as though the universe was against me. when you feel broken, it’s immensely difficult to avoid a growing mindset of pessimism and defeat, but i had to find ways to turn these difficult experiences into sources of hope and reasons for kindness. instead of feeling like i had a bone to pick with the world around me, i came to realize that my own struggles could instead serve as a source of motivation for kindness. the world is broken enough on its own, and i believe that the least we can do is to try to add as little damage to that total as possible. when it comes to encountering brokenness in those around us, we have to remember that everyone has something they are healing from. you turn on the news and you find brokenness. you look at the people you hate and you find brokenness. you look at the people you love and you find brokenness. this can be discouraging, sowing pessimism in our minds, or we can choose to find hope in this truth. broken things can be understood. broken things can be put back together. one of the most meaningful lessons i’ve learned over the past several months has been how to become a part of a community. arriving at notre dame meant being a thousand miles away from everyone and everything that i had previously known. i found myself surrounded by strangers, living and learning with people i barely knew. for any new college student, it’s easy to feel isolated and alone, even when constantly surrounded by others. the realization that finally allowed me to begin to feel at home here was perhaps best put in a reading for class by parker j. palmer. he wrote that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). once i accepted the fact that community was not something that i had to build from the ground up, but rather something that i simply had to embrace, my time at notre dame transformed into a much more joyful and fulfilling experience. i realized that i was part of already existing communities within my dorm, with my fellow engineering majors, and even with the community of the entirety of notre dame. all you have to do to be welcomed to these communities is to show up and be willing to be present and vulnerable with others. however, beyond these communities that i’ve become a part of based on similarities, i’ve also realized that i have the opportunity to seek out communities that can challenge me and help me grow. one of my goals for my time here at notre dame is to expose myself to communities that offer new perspectives and ideas. i’ve lived most of my life in one city. i’ve grown up surrounded by mainly the same people. being at a university like notre dame is a perfect opportunity to encounter new communities, ideas, and experiences, and i plan to take advantage of this by taking classes, joining extracurriculars, and participating in conversations that broaden my mind and perspective on the world around me. finally, my time so far at notre dame has allowed me to encounter hope in various forms, both through others and within myself. in class, we discussed what hope means to us and how we can recognize hopefulness in others. beyond a common link to optimism and perseverance, the idea of hope as a tool for growth struck me as particularly profound. in preparation for class, we read a piece by fr. james b king, which included the statement that we should use hope in order “to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve). i hadn’t previously considered the need for hope in an educational sense, but it makes sense. i have no doubt that my time at college will lead to me being constantly faced with ideas and beliefs that are new to me, and it takes hope in order to allow ourselves to seriously consider new ideas and decide for ourselves what we will make of them. hope is also required as, during these formative four years, i will have to make decisions about my future, my goals, and what impact i’d like my life to have. being at university means that every step forward is a step into the unknown, and yet we have to keep moving. one thing that keeps me motivated to live with this hope, is the hope that i see in others. for all the uncertainty that this time in my life offers, there is also a wonderful opportunity to watch my mentors and friends push fear and doubts aside in the pursuit of something greater. as my first semester of college comes to a close, i look forward to implementing the lessons that i’ve learned throughout the remainder of my time on campus and beyond. perhaps the next time i am faced with dissonance or brokenness, i will see these challenges as opportunities to ask myself meaningful questions and to change my approach to one that considers different perspectives. and when i find myself searching for community or a source of hope, i will have learned that i simply need to embrace those around me in order to find them. integration one assignment integration one assignment these past few months have challenged me in ways i never thought were possible. from the beginning of the school year, when it was extremely humid, to now at the height of midterms, the trials and tribulations i have encountered have been nothing but hard. yet, it has been the hard things that made me realize the hidden truths behind every challenge, success and outcome each day. i believe that i am searching for the right balance. in brene brown’s ted talk, power of vulnerability, she discussed the meaning of vulnerability: “it is to tell your story of who you are with your whole heart.” this motto strongly correlates to my “why” behind everything that i do and has allowed me to be my authentic self. as i continuously wear my heart on my sleeve, and put a hundred percent effort day to day, i have tried to find the balance between meeting high expectations and not being let down when i do not reach them. the confrontation between external success and internal value, as stated in david brooks ted talk, is something that i have learned over my time here at notre dame and am still facing every day. while achieving certain goals is significant, i know that my effort and internal value lies beyond a score or rejection. as brooks discusses the difference between the adam one and adam two sides of human nature, i i believe that my purpose is to fully grasp the balance between both adams; building upon my depth of character and staying true to my moral values such as love, dependency, and self worth. i believe that i forge life giving relationships by being supportive and there for one another. this can be carried out by performing simple acts of kindness such as buying coffee for a friend, or knowing when to simply listen. in lifting others up and having a support system, it is self-rewarding to see my peers turn their struggles into growth. for instance, when my friend was having a hard week at school, trying to manage her long golf practices and studying for a microeconomics midterm, i sat down with her for an hour and helped her study. this helped her be efficient with her time and feel prepared for the exam. i believe that i grow by exploring new opportunities that notre dame has to offer. coming from a public school, faith and spirituality were not intertwined with my education. here, the wide range of resources including the hall masses, lighting candles at the grotto and the priest living in my residence hall will allow me to explore a community full of guidance and love for one another. in an article, “faith brings light to a dark world,” the author mentioned how “spirituality concerns the real world, how we see it, how we do it, and how we approach it.” it not only paves the way to shed light and hope in difficult times, but also reminds us to live and lead with love. establishing a framework will also guide me in finding my truest passions, my people, and above all my self discovery. in father pete’s video, he mentions how, “what truly matters is responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be.” thus, staying true to yourself in response to adversity and challenges is a true definition of growth. i believe that i pursue truth through hearing different perspectives. coming from the west coast, i realized i was sheltered. i had never fully encountered people from the midwest and east coast, and had yet to grasp the dramatic fluctuations in weather. i was not used to people constantly opening doors for me or smiling when i walked past them. most of all, i was sheltered from learning about a culture other than my own. now, i have listened to different perspectives through meeting new people and adapting to a new environment. in relation to the ted talk featuring chimamanda adieche, i have learned to hear more than one single story. she points out that to create a single story is to “show a people as one thing, and only one thing, and that is what they become.” to prevent this from occurring, it is salient to understand all aspects and perspectives to cultivate a knowledge of truth. i believe that i am made to help people. throughout high school, i have enjoyed helping others including senior citizens and children with disabilities. for instance, from volunteering at senior sunrise, i have learned that i enjoy interacting with elders who contain a lot of wisdom and have valuable life experiences. it enabled me to find joy in facilitating human connection, and making somebody else feel loved and appreciated. when i was a camp counselor for children with disabilities, i was able to interact with them through various activities such as creating arts and crafts and playing sports. not only did it make me feel good that i was impacting others, but it also was rewarding to make a difference in people’s lives. in college, i plan to volunteer for the robinson community learning center and help tutor children, along with volunteering at an elderly home. lastly, i believe that i am made to bring family together. when writing the “where i am from poem,” i touched upon the things that have made me who i am today, the most important being family. over the past few months, i have learned to cultivate a family oriented culture, participating in baking with fj’s every tuesday, and helping organize fun events our hall participates in. by bringing people together, i have assimilated a family environment, remninding how my past and future are interconnected through close relationships with people. it has enabled me to form new friendships, share many laughs in the kitchen, and adapt to new changes in my life, and for that i am grateful. moreau integration one the power of beliefs october 10, 2021 root beliefs: 1) i believe that my purpose in life is to bring others joy through creation. 2) i believe that i am responsible for my attitude about life. 3) i believe that i forge meaningful relationships by listening to others. 4) i believe that family is the cornerstone for all of my actions. beliefs debrief: 1) i believe that my purpose in life is to bring others joy through creation. when determining one’s purpose in life, the question is nothing short of grand and daunting. to consider the primary reason for my creation is a large task, from one of which the answer lies in the things i have done and accomplished over the years of my life. this belief is formed from some of the most influential projects i have created over the course of my existance, and these include my custom lego creations and roller coaster models. each year, there is an annual lego convention in my home city of chicago, which draws custom lego creators from all over the world. i have displayed creations at three events, and can say through my interaction with others, this is a major reason i am alive and strive to be the best i can be every day. at the most recent convention, i displayed my life-size, fully operational custom lego pinball machine–the first in the world–and let all onlookers play the model and interact with the build. being a purely mechanical creation, the machine is slightly fragile, but i had hundreds of visitors and strangers play the machine over the weekend long event. it was through this creation and these interactions that i made unforgettable memories, as the major takeaway i and many others had is that the medium of lego, and even creation, was being shifted from static to dynamic. altering the montra of “look but don’t touch” to “interact and enjoy” was something very few builders before me had been able to accomplish, and this idea has stuck with me to this day. in life, i want to not only build creations and machines which others can interact with, but also teach people that they can build amazing creations too. as father pete mccormick explained, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought” (“the role of faith in our story“ by father pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). when i create machines and models, i do so not just for myself, but always with others in mind, whether it be the question of how i can teach them or how i can let them enjoy what i have created. this idea is central to my entire life, and makes me believe that my purpose in life is to bring others joy through the process of creation. 2) i believe that i am responsible for my attitude about life. throughout the many facets of life, including school, relationships, religion, and anything in between, having the right frame of mind can make a world of difference. while we as humans are not in control of every circumstance or outcome in life, we are in control of the ways in which we react to certain scenarios and events. understanding how to utilize the power of the mind and shaping attitudes, and turning this ability into a strength, has been a focus of mine through my time here at notre dame. as david brooks said in his impactful ted talk, “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths. adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). when it comes to using my attitude as a strength, one example, as simple as it may seem, is how i interact with others when engaging in small talk and simple conversation. instead of simply answering “good” or “fine” to the question of “how are you?” i try to make the conversation more interesting by replying with a less common answer, such as an enthusiastic “i’m great, thanks for asking!” which usually brings a smile to their face. trying to make a positive difference, even in small ways, is very important when determining my outlook on life. in a slightly different vein, during my time at notre dame, i’ve noticed the wide variety of people with different ethnicities, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=emb_title https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim genders, religions, and backgrounds than my own. in engaging with people different from me, it can sometimes be difficult to overcome implicit bias, or the preconceived notions we carry about others based on their background. as one article described it, “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7). this closely relates to my own attitude on life, because as the quote highlights, it is difficult to come to terms with the fact that we as humans are not perfect and need to realize we are not always nice. taking time to myself and thinking of ways i have not been good to others helps shape my attitude in a positive way, as i can develop a deeper understanding of the things i think and how i can harness them for the better. 3) i believe that i forge meaningful relationships by listening to others. one of the more challenging aspects in my transition to notre dame and college life has been forming new friendships with people both similar and different than me. in high school, i was hardly on the social spectrum, and preferred to keep to myself in terms of engaging with other people. especially with the covid-19 outbreak and being forced to learn from home for almost a year and a half, my social interactions were very limited up until my arrival to campus. being completely in person, going to class, and living with people my age has been a drastic change of pace from what i had been used to, and i needed to reevaluate how often and why i formed relationships. from the first week of the course, i realized the power in the quote, “they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first, and then to others, because as it turns out, we can’t practice compassion with other people if we can’t treat ourselves kindly.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week 1). meeting people from time to time is one thing, but making strong bonds and friendships with new people was a skill i needed to improve, and the major way i went about this was by focusing on listening to others. my stance on the matter was that since people like to talk about themselves and their own interests, i could make https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 friends and meaningful connections by simply asking questions and letting others speak about themselves, and we could engage in powerful conversations about matters that were important, as opposed to empty dialogue. as one quote expertly described, “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting. great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). coming to notre dame, i wanted to focus on putting other people first when it comes to conversations, and i have done so by asking questions and actively listening, and the results have been spectacular. 4) i believe that family is the cornerstone for all of my actions. even in the midst of the most chaotic and intense weeks of my life, i have still made the time to talk with my family every single week, often more than once. transitioning to college, while it has gone smoother than i initially anticipated, has still been difficult, and knowing my family has my back at all times is unbelievably motivating. before coming to notre dame, they had prepared me for all sorts of circumstances, big and small, and ensured i was prepared for the wealth of changes which i would be experiencing in a new environment. as written in my own poem during week six of the course, “i am from family, / who does everything as one, / in good times and bad, / always finding reasons to stick together” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week 6). not only did my parents teach me the raw skills and mindset to have when coming to college, but they also taught me a set of morals which have always been on my mind in making decisions and determining the ways in which i lead my life. for instance, one of the beliefs that has been passed down from my parents to me is the idea that whenever someone is in need of assistance, always stop to offer a helping hand. this idea has manifested itself in a variety of ways thus far on campus, including helping students with homework and holding doors for others, just to name a few small examples. since i am here, at one of the most https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/15ql99sjwgicmml_d6m6ibtdddfgnce9c1gdbb6bwyck/edit?usp=sharing prestigious universities in the world, i want to give back to the community in any way i can, whether it be directly helping others or staying engaged with my faith by becoming a lector at the basilica. as one quote expertly explained, “i rejoice because we have all learned how precious time is, and that it is the most important asset that you have” (“2021 laetare medal address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). since time is the most important asset we have at our disposal, i want to ensure i not only use it to better myself, but also improve the lives of those around me. with the beliefs of my family which have been bestowed upon me, in conjunction with the opportunity to become an engaged member of the notre dame community, every day i strive to make a positive difference for those around me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&feature=youtu.be mercado 1 fa21-fys-10101-107 nhat nguyen 15 october 2021 time cultivates and nourishes the soul david kekich once said, “cherish time. your most valuable resource. you can never make up the time you lose. the most important choices you’ll ever make are how you use your time.” a root belief that i hold is that time is the most precious thing we have at our disposal. throughout these past seven weeks, i have found my other root beliefs relating to that statement in distinct ways. in the first week of moreau, we discussed the importance of vulnerability and how the lack thereof contributes to lessened experiences throughout our life. a root belief i had prior to this module was that we are made to be vulnerable because it improves our understandings in a way that allows us to fully appreciate and enjoy the events in our lives whether they are good or bad. i firmly think this because i understand i have limited myself to certain things because i have not always allowed myself to be fully susceptible to people and events in my life which has caused me to miss out on certain events in life like romantic endeavors. becoming vulnerable, like everything else, takes time especially after having been exposed to factors that make one less likely to be open. with the discussions from class and meeting new people from different backgrounds, i found myself being the most vulnerable i have ever been in years. i genuinely took the ted talk to heart and wanted to do my absolute best in executing everything that was presented to us from browne; i particularly loved when browne said, “one cannot selectively mercado 2 numb the negative feelings such as grief and shame because you’d also be numbing true joy, gratitude, and happiness.” after this module, i wanted to be more susceptible to these emotions so that i can be “deeply seen, love whole-heartedly, and believe that i am enough.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) during the second week, we began to search for more self-knowledge via surveys and a ted talk from david brooks that focused on the importance of balancing ourselves with success and emotions. he really made me think about how society values the measurable successes way more than the ability to feel compassion and empathy because of how reward driven the community has become. the belief that tied into this module was that people in our community should continue to focus on helping one another rather than becoming like other places and only worrying about oneself. as i have made my way through the first half of the semester, i continued to stay in touch with friends in other universities and colleges who’ve had a very different experience than me. i would talk about how helpful and understanding everyone is here, but my friend in penn said that her environment was more competitive than collaborative. she described the people to be more worried about their personal victories rather than aiding others to reach their highest potential. i knew at that moment that i didn’t want notre dame to ever lose its cooperative atmosphere, which is why i believe that this, like my community back in texas, should always be able to help one another without sabotaging the other person. the balance between our 2 adams, the successful, hardworking version, and the compassionate, human version, in a way that is beneficial to them and others so we do not become “mindless machines without emotional sonorousness.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim mercado 3 week three we moved on to searching for a framework that allowed us to begin viewing the world in a way that correlates with our faith. i believe that i grow in all aspects by allowing my spiritual relation with god develop into an ever-flourishing connection. the reason why i believe this is because i have come to feel as though my faith in him has allowed me to be more empathetic, optimistic, and mindful of my actions when it pertains to others and myself; i have been able to take the teachings from my parents and those in my religion to form my reasons for the things that i do. it has taken me years to get to the point in my faith where i believe that i can continue to further delve into the aspects of religion that help me become a better person. the student reflections we read were especially eye-opening and interesting because of how all their journeys differed from one another. i especially loved leo’s comment where he stated, “faith serves as a stabilizer and a constant in a life that may otherwise be disorienting or overwhelming. faith gives me a focal point in my life that motivates, inspires, and directs me as i try to better myself and advance my career.” i have always felt that believing in my faith has given me the ability to feel grounded in place even when things around me were cascading down. believing in anything, no matter whether it is religious or not, is an amazing thing to have in life because it inspires us to move forward and improve regardless of circumstances. the trips to the grotto and the retreats that i’ve been a part of have already been major influences in my spiritual life as a student here on campus. as i continue to live my life here in notre dame, i realize that “faith wasn’t always so major in my life,” but that i have chosen a place where the religious aspect is so big that i know i will emerge from here with an even deeper connection to the one up above. (“student reflections on faith” curated by campus ministry – moreau fye week 3) the fourth week we focused on the aspect of life that concerns forming relationships with people that are healthy and beneficial to our lives. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view mercado 4 through having honesty and trustworthiness serve as a foundation with which i have every current connection stand on; without those core fundamentals in my friendships, i am not sure whether i would be able to fully connect and believe others who don’t seem to be genuine, caring individuals. as we have all had our fair share and experiences with people throughout our lives, we have all had a run-in with some people who have just not been healthy for us, yet we continued to have a bond with them until eventually we didn’t. the articles from this week were especially captivating because it talked about how we tend to overlook red flags simply because we want to continue to believe that people are not what they seem, even despite constant manipulations or harmful things happening. although i have been here at notre dame for a mere 7 weeks, i have already met a couple of people whom i realized were not ideal friends to have around just because they would only talk to me for a gateway into homework aid or other friends i’ve made. as i reflected on my past experiences, i was able to keep them at arm’s length and slowly burn the bridges between us so that there was no risk of being used or taken advantage of. it has been a slow process, but the encounters i’ve had before, and those i will inevitably have during my time here, will further serve to improve my abilities in acknowledging and listening to the red flags instead of always brushing them off as unimportant. olivia’s statement, “our red flags start going off when we start to notice our friend is taking more than giving, but sometimes we don’t want to admit it to ourselves,” perfectly sums up the main takeaway from this module; however, we must be able to work on being able to distinguish those who are good for us and those who are not. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto – moreau fye week 4) during our fifth week, we began to consider how our stories have formed our journey and experiences throughout our lives, especially with the implication of time looming over our heads https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ mercado 5 at every turn. i believe that i am responsible for allowing myself to grow with every event i’ve faced and making it work in my favor one way or the other; even if the encounter itself was negative, i must remind myself that it taught me something regardless. as we undergraduates begin to really live the notre dame lifestyle, many of us will begin to question our capabilities or if the major we chose is going to work out for us in the end. it is crucial for us to understand that, in the end, we have not wasted time in our endeavors and that idea will show once we fully grasp that all we do will have a purpose in the grand scheme of things. what we do now is not a waste of time, but merely an investment in our future selves in the hope that we will understand the reason for why we did it in the first place. i’ve already had doubts and moments where i felt like my efforts were wasted, but i just keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason and that i can always learn something from the choices and actions i make. i have witnessed multiple students dropping courses and switching their majors and eventually they began to thrive and see that the time they spent in the beginning weeks were not fruitless because they discovered that something else would be better for them. carla harris summarized the meaning of this module best in her speech when she proclaimed, “we have all learned how precious time is, and that it is the most important asset that you have. while we can all get more money, houses, cars, and things, we can never get more time; therefore, we should be extremely intentional with our time and spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week 5) the sixth week we just focused on our roots and initial journey to what shaped us as people. the purpose of this week was to reflect on our experiences and other factors that contributed to how we grew up and formed our aspirations. after having read a sample poem, it was up to me to create a personal poetic piece that covers those origins of who i am now. i https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 mercado 6 summed up my origins as coming from a place of immense love and support because my parents have always instilled me with that strong compassion and curiosity throughout every venture of interest i had. their constant care and encouraging words really made me have a firm belief that my purpose in life is to experiment and figure out what i love and what i do not so that i am never negating myself from an experience that i desire to try. they have always been with me through thick and thin, and i will never allow myself to be blocked from doing what i love or trying new things simply because of what others believe i can or cannot do. thanks to “un amor que no se puede quebrar sobre la distancia porque es infinita y eterna.” (“i am from love” by – moreau fye week 6) finally, during our seventh week in moreau, we touched base on the importance of identifying perspectives so that we could work toward pursuing the truth in every situation. prior to this module, i firmly held on to the belief that a story is not 2-dimensional and that there will always be another perspective that must be analyzed before construing a conclusion about it. in our societies, people find it so easy to generalize and form assumptions on people and situations with only the provision of limited information and a lack of research into these given details. to prevent such behavior and comments, we must work together as a society to continue providing more sides of the same story to show that there is not only one main story; we cannot keep placing one person or situation above an entire group of people because not everyone does not act the same regardless of where they’re from. as chimamanda said, “i've always felt that it is impossible to engage properly with a place or a person without engaging with all of the stories of that place and that person. the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar.” without taking the time to look at and properly analyze all the https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/assignments/31977/submissions/35231?download=290585 mercado 7 different perspectives and viewpoints involved in something, it is impossible for us to come to an accurately complete idea of what took place. thus, to pursue the truth we must remember that there is always more than one side to a story. we cannot continue to be victim to the “single stories” that are fed to us in an attempt to provide only certain views about specific groups of people or events that took place; we must continue to look at the other dimensions involved so we can properly view a “complete” version of the story. (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi – moreau fye week 7) conclusively, all these smaller beliefs have a connection to my big belief regarding time and its importance in our lives because of how priceless the resource is. everything we’ve discussed throughout our modules are things that take time to do; it takes time to be vulnerable, create a balance between work and emotions, fulfill a religious relationship, form genuine connections, learn from past experiences, reflect on our roots, and pursue the full, complete truth. one cannot do these things overnight or all at once, it is something that requires immense focus and selectivity to further improve ourselves in a way that makes us holistically improved and complete. thus, we must continue to value and use our time wisely so that throughout our lives we continue to grow and discover ourselves in a way that benefits us and others. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau fye integration as a teenager, it is important for me to identify the principles that i will live my life by. i have entered my time at college with some of these principles already in mind but being at notre dame will further my development even more. during the first seven weeks of my moreau first year experience, i have been able to narrow down some of these principles and refine them into “core beliefs” that i will model my life after. each belief has been present in my life and they have impacted me in various ways, whether it be in struggles or successes. these core beliefs are what make up my mind and heart, yet it is the reasoning behind them that requires the deepest reflection. first, in week one i discerned that i believe that i am responsible for making myself vulnerable because it can make me a better person. often times, people use the word “vulnerable” in a demeaning context and only understand it to be a sign of fragility. this definition is deceiving and very far from the truth. vulnerability is not only a sign of trust, but also growth. in class discussions, we talked about how being vulnerable can open you up to new things about yourself that you don’t even know yet. fully embracing vulnerability also creates new opportunities. in a ted talk, brené brown said, “they believed what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this quote nicely summarizes the idea that being vulnerable ultimately betters a person because it allows them to grow. personally, i tend to keep my emotions to myself and not share my true feelings. moreau has helped teach me that being vulnerable is a good thing and the people that truly care about you will be accepting of it. previously, i was challenged by the fact that i did not share my feelings and kept emotions bottled up inside. this would result in feelings of depression and anxiety that pushed me into a deeper cycle of not sharing. recently, i have been trying to open-up to my parents and friends more, and they have been very understanding and helpful. i have noticed that my overall mood has been better, and i find it easier to deal with my problems. my idea that sharing my feelings would make me a burden are slowly subsiding and i now realize that being vulnerable will make me into a better person. second, i believe that i grow by reinventing myself into a new and better man. week two required a deeper dive into what kind of values we wished to be recognized for. in accordance with this, david brooks said, “in order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooksmoreau fye week two). this point resonated with me because i have failed to listen to this advice in my life. brooks is emphasizing that in order to grow as a person, you need to forget your past self and habits so that you may focus on honorable virtues rather than just external recognition. i have struggled in my life with changing habits and addictions because i have done my best to ignore them. i tend to prioritize my work and search for recognition, but after week two i have tried to remind myself that being a better person is what i should strive for. each week, i obviously complete my work, but i rely on a mindset that grades are not my sole reason for being here, but rather i am here to grow into a better man through my work and struggles. this type of growth is a slow and steady process that i now know will require a reinvention of myself. next, i believe that i am searching for tangible faith in my life. in a video, fr. pete mccormick says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” ("the role of faith in our story" by fr. pete mccormickmoreau fye week three). notre dame’s mission includes allowing students to search for themselves beyond education. at a catholic university, this search also incorporates faith. prior to attending notre dame, i never indulged in self-discovery of myself or my faith because i would tend to focus my time elsewhere. i feel like this left me at a strict disadvantage that i tried to compensate for by picking notre dame because of its spiritual prowess. similarly, in the material for week five, a video of fr. kevin grove contains the quote, “…letting faith and reason both in their fullness be applied to every part of life” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grovemoreau fye week five). i feel like this quote helps to summarize the deeper advantages of a notre dame education. notre dame is a unique place because it allows faith and academics to overlap, deepening spirituality within students. as i stated previously, this is one of the major reasons i chose notre dame and i wish to pursue a lifestyle where faith and reason are equals. building from this, the biggest challenge for me with my faith has been the doubts i have while still believing in god. people discuss how questioning is a good sign in faith, but i feel like i am extremely logical to the point of overthinking the mysteries of faith. since coming to nd and participating in things such as moreau and dorm-wide masses, i have gained some knowledge about my spirituality. still, i know that i am nowhere near the point in my spiritual journey that i wish to reach. solving my doubts will require me to let go of my need to be precisely logical and lend more trust to god. in this way, i will continue to search for tangible, understandable faith in my life using what notre dame will teach me. furthermore, i believe that my community should be made up of people who have my best interest in mind. week four discussed relationships and in the “i love you” video, there is a quote at the end that says, “you hug me and say that it’s okay and you take all the blame” ("because i love you, double whisky" by one love foundationmoreau fye week four). this video and the other materials from week four addressed toxic relationships and manipulation. i can confidently say that in my life i have faced challenges with this because of how social i try to be. recalling the first two years of high school, i was in various toxic relationships where the other person did not truly care about me, and the sole purpose of the relationship was me trying to help the other person. in junior and senior year, i entered relationships that had mutual care and respect. this was one of the best transitions i have made in my life, but my focus now is on maintaining these relationships and developing new relationships with the same principles. my family is the most important piece of my “community”, and they are the reason that i want all my relationships to be modeled after the care they have for me. therefore, i believe that the community surrounding me should be made up of people who care for me and want the best for me because they will create a support system that allows me to grow and thrive. finally, i believe that i pursue truth by working to eliminate implicit bias in my mind. this topic was addressed in week seven. in an article regarding stereotypes, the author reassures the reader that having stereotypes is not always negative by saying, “it just means your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, american scientificmoreau fye week seven). this quote, along with the other materials, helped broach the topic of stereotypes in class and in my own mind. in my own life, i feel like stereotypes do not play a major role in my decision making. obviously, as the authors and speakers discuss, everybody has some sort of stereotypes in their mind. personally, i feel like my stereotypes are mainly influenced by my surroundings and background. as i discussed in week six, and what was the main premise of my poem, “i am who my family has made me to be” (“where i’m from poem” by myselfmoreau fye week six). as with all things, this has both positive and negative consequences. my biggest challenge with stereotypes and bias has not been the way they effect my interactions with others, but rather how i view myself and make decisions. one stereotype that i think is prominent in my life is the stereotype surrounding masculinity. examples of this would be that men don’t share their feelings or men don’t cry. i often find myself believing such things, but i have recently been trying to address these ideas by discussing my feelings with people close to me. i have previously made some progress in breaking down bias, but moreau opened my mind up even more. i believe that my search for truth relies on my ability to remove bias and stereotypes from my mind so that i may clearly view the world and make healthy decisions. the process of discovering my core beliefs has been aided by my experiences in moreau. through the weekly materials, class discussions, and personal reflection, i have come to conclusive ideas of how i currently live my life and what i wish to model my life after in the future. my core beliefs make up who i am as a person in the way they were developed, how they challenge me, and how i apply them to my everyday life. moreau fye integration one professor vanessa chan moreau fye due: 10.15.21 a child of god over the past few weeks, i’ve had the opportunity to undergo valuable introspection and confront myself with meaningful questions about my identity and my beliefs. i’m very grateful for notre dame making sure we take the moreau fye; while some may view it as superfluous, i’ve had a wonderful time in my section with my classmates and professor chan, who brings the class together like glue. through this time i’ve spent reflecting, i’ve come to discover some deeply rooted beliefs that are a core part of my identity and have shaped the person i am today throughout my life’s journey. my first and most important belief which resides over and pervades all areas of my life is my faith. i am a protestant christian first and foremost. i believe in jesus christ as my saviour; through him all are saved, not by works but by grace. while i have valued this aspect of my life for as long as i can remember, week three gave me an opportunity to take a breather and think about what my faith truly means to me, especially now that i am here at nd. i’ve gotten a better idea of how it's been a guiding force throughout my life. my parents, who are also very devout (but never pressured me to be a christian) often seek god’s will through prayer; this concept may seem esoteric to those who hold different beliefs, but everywhere that god has led me has build me up in different ways and were valuable experiences to help me grow. (i’ll discuss the places i’ve lived in later). god has not failed me, even in my lowest points when i’ve felt angry at him or didn’t understand why certain things happened. my values, then, are strongly influenced by my faith; i try to live so that at the end of every day no one will despise me or feel that i’ve wronged them. i desire to be the light of the world, and coming to nd has been like bathing in a beacon of light. a quote i loved from week three’s qqc was from father pete’s video (an awesome guy): “a thief comes only to steal and slaughter and destroy. i came so that they might have life and have it more abundantly.” (“the role of faith in our story” (fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.) moreau fye week three). it highlights the difference between those who walk according to their faith and those who reject god’s love for them. one of the reasons i was attracted to nd was that it was an institution founded upon the christian faith that had not rejected its values in favor of secular pandering. i have not been let down, i absolutely love it here. fr. pete, in the video, also explains how through faith we can build each other up and have the full communal experience in our time at nd by coming closer to each other and god. this ties into week two, when we analyzed our strengths and weaknesses. my top strength came out as spirituality (via character strengths survey (via adult survey) moreau fye week two) followed by bravery. therefore i believe my strength lies in my faith (“i can do all things through christ who strengthens me.” philippians 4:13) and my bravery in living out that faith without shame, without ever forgetting why and how i am who i am. this analysis into my qualities only further cemented the place that christianity holds in my life and heart. i was concerned when i came here that people might not take their faith too seriously, and while that may sometimes be the case, i’ve found amazing people and entire groups of christians (not just protestants) here that have allowed me to be encouraged and to encourage each other. for example, participating in iron sharpens iron, a group of believers that meets for worship and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=emb_imp_woyt https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup fellowship weekly, has given me true joy and a time when i can rest my burdens on god and have heart to heart conversations with people who similarly understand the great role our saviour plays in our lives. i believe that only by being genuine can you be a true friend. in high school, despite attending a catholic prep school, few of my classmates held any true beliefs or even ethical compasses. there was lots of talking behind others’ backs, artificial relationships and constant masks/pretending. people never really said what they were thinking and sometimes it was hard to become close friends with certain people because of this behaviour. while i did find a few true friends, i also experienced being left out or not receiving invites to activities. the grotto article from week four says “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (olivia t. taylor, grotto) moreau fye week four). the toxic signs discussed in the article are very real and present, not just at my high school but among almost all groups of adolescents these days. as we place increasing value on the self i’ve noticed that people can begin to care less and less about those around them. i think nd, however, is a great exception where everyone treats each other as a family; it is truly heartwarming to be on this campus witnessing the care and affection we all have for each other. weeks five and six made me ponder the stories, the places i’ve lived in and how i’ve been affected by them and learned from them and nd’s story as well. i believe that each region of the world i live in has played a crucial role in my growth and development and that there were things i had to learn from each place to progress in my life. despite being born in california, i spent my early years in wilmore, ky. it was the perfect place to grow up, a warm, small town filled with joy and peace, with churches on every street. i learned true kindness here. living overseas in taiwan during middle school when my parents felt called to serve at an overseas https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ seminary was very tough at first, due to extreme culture shock, but it allowed me to further embrace my asian heritage and come to see firsthand where my dad is from (my dad’s taiwanese, my mom is korean). i eventually ended up loving it there, not to mention the delightful cuisine. in rhode island i witnessed the core of our nation, new england, filled with rich history and a sophistication not found elsewhere. it helped me iron out kinks and understand the upper classes of our nation. and in los angeles, where i live, i’ve witnessed a cultural melting pot and also seen the carefree sector of america slowly fade as people treat the state with less and less respect (litter everywhere!). each of these places has made me who i am, and nd has even more depth. in terms of the complexity of our journeys, i am like notre dame. being able to attend a school with a beautiful history is amazing. in fr. grove’s talk he quotes fr. sorin: “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” (fr. kevin grove, c.s.c.) moreau fye week five). i hope that the vision of this university can help me achieve that good, to go out into the world and change it after god’s own heart. i will use the skills i hone here, the people i meet, the things i do, to shake the outside world to the core. and i genuinely believe this place has and will continue to do good in not just this country but the whole world, because it has god. and “if god is with us, who can be against us?” (romans 8:31). this search into myself will continue, even after i am done with moreau. i will keep the lessons i’ve learned from weeks one and seven in mind as a framework moving forward. i believe that truth is best discovered through opening yourself up and being vulnerable and that having multiple perspectives and aspects gives the most complete picture. in her moving ted talk, chimamanda adichie says “a single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue but that they are incomplete.” (“the danger of a single https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story story” (chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week seven). this is one of the most truthful statements of all time. stereotypes come not from lies but from omissions of truth, inaccurate portrayals of ideas and cultures that can miss out on beautiful things. when we jump to conclusions, or listen to unilateral narratives, we risk missing out on not only the actual truth but parts of people and ideas. in order to accept new ideas that may be different or foreign we must accept that “vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, love.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). you cannot open up and experience so much more without first giving up a part of yourself in becoming vulnerable and ready to grow. nd is home to so many different people from all over the world, who have different religious beliefs, orientations, and political ideas. while i’ve had a colorful geographical past, i am looking forward to all i will continue to learn and absorb from this amazing community around me. every day i meet someone new who tells me something i may have never considered before. in class, my peers present newfound knowledge and ask questions that prompt me to ask my own. only by having respect for each other and our differences can we show respect for the truth, the whole truth. while i don’t exactly know what belief was cemented by my week six poem, i loved writing it and found it a breath of fresh air in a fast paced, self centered society that values forgetting the past and where they are from. being reminded of my origins and each step that has added a layer of depth to my identity was incredibly fulfilling to delve into. thank you for this opportunity to take the plunge into truths that matter, and i look forward to everything this course brings next! https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be integration 2 assignment: opportunities for growth opportunities for growth difficulties, progress, laughter. i have been challenged both inside and outside of the classroom here. this semester at notre dame has been one that has been filled with change as i adjust to college and living away from home in this new part of my life. i went to a high school that was relatively small, so one change is that at notre dame there are generally large amounts of people near me, whether at the football games, on my way to class, or in the dining halls, which has been a different experience for me. i suppose i just did not really think about this facet of my experience before coming here. as this semester draws to a close, my first classes here end soon. i have encountered new friends, chances to do things i care about, and opportunities to grow in my catholic faith. friendships have enhanced my time here. at notre dame, i have found other people who care about the catholic faith and like to pray. while i have other friends that i know from other places such as my dorm, there are people that i would consider myself to have a deeper connection with. i share common values with them. additionally, i have had meaningful conversations with them, and i have learned from them. i often pray with my friends and we sometimes eat together. having friends that practice the faith with intentionality is a blessing. i have encountered opportunities to do things that are important to me here. for instance, i enjoy exercising, and i know that it is important for my well-being. in my dorm, i have access to an elliptical machine and to a treadmill. in addition, i can run around st. mary’s lake and st. joseph’s lake; i can run and see other parts of campus as well. i also like to play the oboe; i had the option to not continue playing it in college. however, through being in symphonic band, i continued to play. also, the pro-life cause, protecting life from conception to natural death, is important to me and being a part of the right to life club here on campus has provided me with opportunities to learn more, to pray with the group, and to get involved. encountering opportunities to do things that i care about has benefitted me during my time here. i have encountered ways to grow in my faith here. i had been wanting to attend a latin mass, and i finally went to the one in alumni chapel less than two weeks ago. also, at my dorm, pasquerilla west, there is a rosary every school week. i appreciate having a chapel on the floor below mine. i also appreciate the presence of a catholic newspaper on campus, the rover. to continue, “catholic” means universal and the catholic church is present across the world. indeed, “in the pentecost story, at the very birth of the christian church, each bystander could understand the utterances of the other, even though they were expressed in the tongues of different and unknown languages...rev. bryan massingale observes...when the holy spirit descended upon that crowd, differences of race, language and culture were not canceled or annulled, nor were they obstacles to unity” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory” by christopher j. devron, s. j. moreau fye week ten). additionally, the opportunity to go to adoration and confession are blessings that i have here. the opportunity to attend daily mass is an incredible blessing as well. through the catholic sacraments, catholics hope to encounter jesus: “moreau wrote in 1849 that ‘jesus christ should be our model since our likeness to the divine master is the foundation of our journey to eternal glory’ (cl, 36)” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). blessed basil moreau recognized that we must be like jesus. during my time here, i have experienced challenges to my faith in various ways and i have sinned; nonetheless, i must remember not to lose hope but to continue persevering and letting god heal me. the weather has certainly changed since my arrival here, and i have changed too. i have connected with others who share a passion for the catholic faith, and i have had the opportunity https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ to do things that i care about. next semester, how i get involved in things that i care about will most likely look different, but i will nevertheless continue. each week brings new challenges, and the challenges of the future are unpredictable. from julia hogan’s perspective, “when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i would say that i am fairly independent and self-motivated, but if i feel at some point that i am basing my happiness on the expectations of other people in an unhealthy way, i should change my mindset. also, i’m a part of a variety of communities here at notre dame including through clubs and classes. according to parker j. palmer “‘community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives.”’ (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j palmer moreau fye week eleven). he continues, indicating that this is because we see characteristics that we do not like in ourselves in other people. navigating relationships with people i do not like is challenging, and it is something i could improve upon. also, i have been recommended by several people to seek counseling; however, thus far i have not done so--this is also something that i could do. i can continue growing in my relationships with my friends and learning from them. i certainly have many areas to grow in in the future, and i need to grow in my faith and know that i can trust that jesus will be with me and that i need to look to him. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ integration two kevin mckenna mr. whittington moreau first year november 28, 2021 integration two: growing under the dome prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? it is safe to say that my first three months at notre dame have been some of the best of my life. from the siegfried initiation weekend to the final home football game and everything in between, i can safely say that i am happy i chose notre dame. however, as much as i love everyday here, there are constant challenges that allow me to grow as both a student and a person. coming into notre dame, my mindset was that if i enjoy everyday and put in maximum effort, things will work out. i did not really have expectations when it came to grades or friendships. my reasoning for coming into college with an open mindset was because of how hard i work to get accepted into my dream school. my entire life i had imposed high expectations on myself to achieve my goal of getting into notre dame, so receiving the acceptance letter was a freeing moment. i never want to stress as much over grades here as i did in high school. as julia hogan claimed, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (hogan). i often felt this way throughout highschool when it came to my grades or other extracurricular activities such as basketball, like if i did not make varsity or the highest honor roll i was not good enough for notre dame. during my freshman year, i have been able to maintain the same standards for myself by working hard and staying disciplined without a high level of stress and it has been really healthy for me. this is something i hope to maintain throughout my four years of college even when my life does inevitably get more difficult during job recruiting and higher level classes. another aspect of notre dame that i have appreciated is how many unique perspectives the students here have. coming from houston, texas, most people i knew had very similar backgrounds because we were all from the same neighborhood. while i loved becoming close to many people who were similar to me, i often felt group polarization taking place where our viewpoints were pushed to extreme levels because we had nobody to challenge us or add new ways of thinking to the table. during my second week of college, i said something at a party that would have been completely normal amongst my social circle back home, and i got challenged for my opinion. instead of being stubborn, i listened to a different point of view and used the experience as an opportunity to grow. division only hurts our university, so i believe students should be willing to challenge each other but also come to practical solutions. as father devron remarks, “the ongoing conflicts over critical race theory have followed a predictable pattern of polarization. for catholic and jesuit schools, this division is inimical to our mission and damaging to the body of christ” (devron s.j.). while people are entitled to their own beliefs, it is vital that these differences do not lead to division amongst the larger community. having unique perspectives is great, but the second they become divisive and toxic there is a problem. the fact that notre dame is grounded in the catholic faith is great because that spirituality can be used as a moral compass to inform the decisions and beliefs the students here have including myself. the notre dame community is such a special place. please find another school where you can be challenged so rigorously both academically and spiritually while having a great time in the process. for example, within the span of a week i took an accounting midterm, a theology midterm then went to a football game on saturday with my friends and found myself at dorm mass in siegfried hall sunday night with that same group of friends. to me, this balance is something so unique and special about notre dame. it cultivates growth and enjoyment in multiple ways which is something no other university replicates in the same way as notre dame. sure i may be biased, but this quotation perfectly illustrates my argument, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (parker j. palmer). the notre dame community has been the biggest gift i have ever received in my life. both of my parents are notre dame alumni, so i have experienced this gift throughout my childhood as they raised me. now being at notre dame on my own journey, i am even more thankful for the opportunity to take part in this amazing community because it truly is a gift. now as i mentioned earlier, the guiding force of my life and this notre dame community is the catholic faith which is something that makes notre dame unique from just about any top university in the united states. some schools can be great places to learn, others can be great places to conduct research, but notre dame combines these two aspects of academia while also adding faith. notre dame perfectly combines faith, academics, and research which makes it the best fit for me. as the passage states, “human life is only a long way of the cross. it is not necessary to enter the chapel or the church to run over the various stations. the way of the cross is everywhere, and we walk along it every day in spite of ourselves and often unknown to us” (conference to sisters at st. laurent, canada, 1857). as i continue to live out my four years at notre dame and however long after that. i must always remember that god needs to lie at the center of my life. all of these great experiences and learning opportunities are only possible because of him. part of being a good catholic and living a good life is understanding the importance of faith. sources julia hogan, lcpc. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?ut m_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. devron, christopher j., et al. “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” america magazine, 20 aug. 2021, https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-scho ols-black-lives-matter-240792. “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal.” center for courage & renewal, 25 feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. holy cross and christian education integration one the backbone to personal growth root belief 1: i believe that i grow by having the courage to strengthen my weaknesses. whenever i think of someone growing as a person i think of a little plant growing to be a flower. this idea emerged from the picture books i read in elementary school, but it has stuck with me throughout my life. when one thinks of how a flower sprouts one can acknowledge the resources it needs to grow such as sunlight, water, and a good environment. if the flower does not have these resources it tries to move its stem towards them and fights for its needs. i think that it is very similar for someone who wants to grow as a person as they must not only work towards strengthening their strengths but also their weaknesses. however, one acquires to have the courage to be willing to accept their faults, show them to others and ultimately aid them. as dr. brown mentioned in her ted talk, those who are willing to be seen truly seen by others are able to show vulnerability. she describes how those who achieve to show their true self are the ones who have a strong sense of love, and belonging, and believe that they are worthy of love and belonging. she stated, “and so these folks had, very simply, the courage to be imperfect” ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). i think that those who show vulnerability are the ones who believe they are worthy of connection and brave enough to open themselves up. therefore, i believe that for someone to grow they must show their vulnerability as one’s weaknesses are tied in with their vulnerability and they will never be able to strengthen them if they do not identify them. for example, when i moved to poland freshman year, i entered a brand new environment where i felt that i did not belong. meeting a lot of new people and having to make new friends brought me to be self-conscious of myself and question whether i was good enough. however, once i acknowledged that one of my weaknesses was being too shy i started to strive towards putting myself out there. therefore, by having the courage to fight my weakness and tackle it i was able to grow as a person and a friend. as david brooks states, “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses. you go into yourself, you find the sin which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau week 2). he explains how even though our world is filled with adam 1, a persona entailed with a lot of egos and a deep craving for success, we must strive towards an adam ii mentality. in order to achieve this mentality, one must fight their own weaknesses. therefore, i believe that character development https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim can only be achieved through building my strengths and weaknesses and having the courage to build them. root belief 2: i believe that one must have faith to live a purposeful life. my definition of faith is learning and working out of love and it is reinforced through my belief in god. since i was a little girl, i was told that i should act like christ. i was not just told this just because of my religion, but because of what the image of christ reflects: love, hope, virtue kindness, and humility. i believe that having faith allows me to unravel these characteristics and act out of them in love. as fr. grove stated, “an education, a work of the resurrection” (two notre dames: your holy cross education by fr. grove moreau week 5). he explains how if one has faith and applies it to their daily lives they are able to achieve growth as a person. the reason for this is because they began to prioritize community service and live the truth to serve. by helping others, we achieve living a purposeful life as we work towards making a difference in the world. for example, through having faith and reason, i have pushed myself the past four years to help my community. living in monterrey, mexico, a place where the majority of the people live in poverty, i have sought to help by organizing an annual fundraiser for my local public school. by donating over 150 hygienic and school supplies kits, i helped enrich the lives of many students in my community. i created bonds with the students through love and faith as i would also tutor them weekly. at notre dame, i continue to learn to love and create relationships. fr. grove states how at this catholic university one opens up to a family through reason and faith. however, not everyone must be catholic to experience this opportunity to grow as a person. he describes how our lives are not our resumes, but indeed the experiences one undergoes. this experience is what allows one to live a purposeful life as it entails service to others and acting out of love in all ways. at notre dame, i have joined various clubs that are dedicated to helping others such as adoptafamily and enable. i strive to continue making a difference in the world by living a life out of service and love. therefore, i believe that it is very important for people to have faith in their life. as fr. pete states, “such a journey requires a framework that challenges our modern understanding of the meaning of life the christian spiritual tradition is clear on this topic at the core of oneself is the very presence of god” (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete moreau week 3). fr. pete explains how individuals must undergo a journey of self-discovery with a framework in life and answering the question of our existence. however, the answer to this question entails one having faith as it is discovered through the presence of god himself. having faith requires individuals to look at life differently and rather with a bright aspect. whenever i think about the framework of my life, i think of my https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois new life at notre dame. i believe that on my journey of self-discovery at my new home i must have faith and hope to make the most of it. by continuing to grow my faith at this university will help me to keep strengthening my core values, live my life to the fullest, learn to love, and have courage. individuals with faith are able to tackle challenges in life and learn how to be hopeful about the future. therefore, i believe that one must have faith in order to fulfill their purpose and live a life out of service and love. root belief 3: i believe that i grow by undergoing new experiences and encountering others. i was born and raised in houston, texas, and lived around 14 years of my life in the same neighborhood. up until eighth grade, i was surrounded by the same people since kindergarten. our ideologies and mindsets were all very similar as we all had around the same lifestyles. it wasn’t until i moved to warsaw, poland, that i left my little bubble in houston and ventured on meeting new people from different backgrounds. i dove into a new lifestyle where i would learn something new every day, such as how the poles do not clap nor make noise during a movie, or that “dzien dobry” means good morning. through this experience, i gained knowledge of the polish language, culture, and issues encountered by that culture. i moved to a new country that was filled with the sad and rich history of wwii and the communism of the soviet union. before moving to poland, i would only feel sorry for the polish people due to how many suffered in concentration camps and the crack that was left on the country. i only had one perspective on this nation that i gained from reading holocaust novels in school and just as novelist chimamanda adichie stated, “she had felt sorry for me even before she saw me” (danger of a single story by chimamanda adichie moreau week 7). just like chimamanda’s roommate, i was someone who reflect the risk of listening to just one story about someone and their nationality. novelist chimamanda adichie mentions how her roommate pitied her because of where she was from even before listening to her story. this is the type of assumption that one can make when they only get one aspect of someone’s life. from only reading the sad history of the polish people, i never believed to think of them as fighters until moving to poland. by getting a new perspective, i came to learn that the polish people were very hard-working people, and even if their ancestors were victims of various communist reigns they are perceived as fighters. through making polish friends, i gained an open mindset which allowed me to grow intellectually as well as a person. i learned the importance of hearing both sides of a story and how an experience can influence the way one thinks. for example, after writing my poem for week 6, i learned how my experience of living in three different nations has made me be the https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare person i am today. i am both mexican and american, and by encountering people from both of these cultures i have gained different perspectives. at notre dame, i will be able to continue gaining a new lens on the world by meeting new people who come from different backgrounds and learning their perspectives. therefore, by this new experience in college, i will continue to grow as a person. i will strive to form lifelong friendships at notre dame and learn how to maintain healthy relationships. as olivia t. taylor states, “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor week 4). she describes the importance of listening and paying attention to your friend, partner, or acquaintance. at notre dame, i strive for character development by seeking friends who love me for who i am and who will help me be the best version of myself. therefore, i believe that i grow as a person by meeting new people, learning new perspectives, and undergoing new experiences. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ integration one moreau 10/14/2021 integration one a new start and new beliefs root belief 1: i believe that embracing my vulnerability and flaws is key to living a happy and fulfilling life. when first entering moreau, we were told by previous students that being vulnerable was crucial in receiving the most benefit from the course. as we reach the end of the first quarter, i couldn't agree more. in week one of moreau, we discussed the power of vulnerability and the courage to be vulnerable as integral parts of our journey. as i reflect now, i was able to pinpoint a root belief that best encompasses this. i first started believing that embracing my flaws and differences as being important to my life was when i transitioned into notre dame, especially the gateway community. i had not created previous friend groups over text before the year, nor had i even spoken to any entering students. i wanted a fresh start, with a fresh perspective. similarly, i did not have notre dame family or friends that i could rely on sufficient to say, i felt lost. and, when an individual feels lost, they attempt to mold themselves into who they should be instead of who they actually are. i learned that this methodology is the opposite approach to happiness through experience, but also through course content and teachings. in brene brown’s speech regarding vulnerability, she stated that “these folks (referencing her speech) simply had the courage to be imperfect...they believed that what made them vulnerable, made them beautiful.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) this quote particularly resonated with me during this time period because it helped me realize that, while transitionary periods may be difficult, it is important that i embrace my true self. in embracing myself, i found beauty and peace in my actions. another important piece of content that helped me embrace vulnerability came from david brook’s speech regarding our adam 1 and adam 2 side. brook’s made it apparent that in order for someone to find on paper success, it entails that they usually neglect the harder aspects of life, like love, accepting sins, and deepening character. (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) this piece of content relates to vulnerability because it allows us to realize that embarrassing our weaknesses is necessary in living a fulfilling life. after arriving at notre dame, i have begun to embrace the faith aspect of the school that makes it so unique. while i am weak at expressing faith right now, as david https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim brooks would call it, i am allowing myself to be vulnerable and practice my flaws so i can find more fulfillment in my life. root belief 2: i believe that i grow authentically when i embrace a tight-knit circle of friends, family, and spirituality, allowing me to express my true self, make mistakes, and bask in each other's successes. throughout the first quarter, i have begun to understand what being spiritual actually means. i always thought that it meant that i was religious, believed in a god, etc. however, through moreau, i have learned that spiritually is far more broad and important to me and my life. in reading david fagerberg’s article regarding spirituality, my understanding of these concepts were greatly enhanced. he discussed how faith, hope, and love are all intertwined in creating your spirit, and his article brought light to the false beliefs that i always held about what this meant. (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). once i recognized how spiritually includes love, hope, and faith, i realized that my life revolves around the teachings of spiritually. i value my community, friends, and family more than anything in this world, and it is in understanding this intersection of the two ideas is where i found my root belief to be true. when it comes to my growth as a person, it all stems from my circle of individuals pushing me to become a better person everyday. whether this ranges from motivation in a sport, in school, or consolation in hard times, i lean on both my spirituality and my people. george ella lyon, in her “where i’m from” poem, gives detailed imagery into her life, her connections, and her upbringing. (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week five) i find that the idea of “where i’m from” is crucial in understanding me as a person. i am from many places, many people, and many things; however, i choose to only let a few individuals influence my life, and those who i choose are the ones who help me grow. in summary, i feel that my authentic growth as a person, scholar, and human, comes from the intersection of spirituality and the individuals close to me. in combining the practices of love, hope, and faith, along with the mentorship of my people, i find my most success. root belief 3: i believe that understanding healthy vs unhealthy relationships is an important part of my life and that helping myself and others navigate relationships and community is very rewarding. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=partner&utm_medium=promotion&utm_campaign=moreau http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html it is a universal truth that at some point in an individual’s life, they will run into relationships with others that are not healthy. not everyone is built the same, nor does everyone get along the same. moreau has taught me what a healthy vs unhealthy relationship looks like, which is an integral part of relationship building. however, more importantly, i have learned during this course the methods in navigating relationships, how to detach yourself from relationships, and how to help others navigate their relationships. in oliva t. taylor’s article regarding toxic relationships, she outlines five key signs that you are in a toxic relationship. the piece that i find most applicable to my life and my root belief is that individuals in a toxic relationship may be used in order for the other person to get what they want. (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) throughout high school, i have met “friends” that ultimately used me for homework, questions, essays, etc. this is not life or death, but it helped me realize that these types of behaviors are not normal nor acceptable in a healthy relationship. during moreau, i was able to hone these recognition skills and make it a root belief in my life that understanding healthy vs. unhealthy actions is very important in finding true meaning in my life. while determining healthy and unhealthy behavior in my own life is very important, i find that helping others navigate the troubling aspects of relationships, community, or other external factors is the most rewarding type of help. in carla harris’ speech, she said that “the way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know, to help others.” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week six) this quote was the most significant piece of advice i have heard in this course because it is applicable in all facets and situations in life. when it comes to helping others navigate relationships, her advice shines as bright as the sun. if we delegate our time and resources to helping others better their “story” and find importance in their life, especially in mending strong relationships, we see our own lives turn from not only successful but to empowering and significant. root belief 4: i believe that initial judgments and implicit biases damage our society by perpetuating harmful distinctions and labels in my final root belief, i wanted to explore the idea of implicit biases more in depth, specifically in labeling someone’s story for them. in chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk, she discusses her background of growing up in a world of single stories and biases. a quote that stood out as profound to me was “what struck me was this: she had felt sorry for me even before she saw me. her default position toward me, as an african, was a kind of patronizing, well-meaning pity. my roommate had a single story of africa: a single story of catastrophe.” https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) in this quote, chimamanda discusses the negative implications of a single story in regards to the continent of africa in other words, a much larger scale. however, the principle stays true regardless of the situation, and that is people develop implicit biases and stories, even if there is no malicious intent. so, how does that affect the world now? well, biases and the single story downfall has created a world so polarized politically, emotionally, ethically, across all sorts of issues. politicians hold staunch views about individuals, and even the educational elite still hold biases and are not open minded. i mentioned this in an earlier qqc, but i am too a victim of implicit bias. while not intentional, it is in human nature to judge and give distinctions quickly, holding a figurative notecard above someone’s head saying “i am (blank) and nothing more.” if we continue at this pace, we must ask ourselves, will we ever be considered equal, or will we always have a label over our head? https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-32487 vu 1 professor thigpen fys10101-97 15 october 2021 the journey of adulthood coming to notre dame was a big change in my life as i transitioned into adulthood and started my search for meaning in life. since i was coming to a new place, i remained hopeful to find good, life-long friends. not surprisingly, my top strength when taking the via character strengths survey was hope (via character strengths survey – moreau fye week two). i could have easily tried to be someone i am not so i could fit into a certain crowd, but i am so glad that i did not. through trial and error with different friend groups, i have found really great friends here at notre dame, and it makes me feel so good to know that i have friends who will only make me a better person. i knew these friendships would be great after reading the article from grotto network and seeing this quote: “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). because my friends support me and spread positive energy, i know these relationships will last. taking notes from brene brown’s talk, i realized that being vulnerable will help build my relationships exponentially, and it all starts with me being vulnerable to myself. she says to be truly vulnerable is to “believe that we’re enough” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). this quote sticks with me because i sometimes feel like i do not belong here but i need to believe that i do belong, and my hard work is what got me here. i came from the nrotc preparatory program through holy cross college so comparing my high https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be vu 2 school experiences to kids who got 5s on every ap exam is often a struggle for me. whenever i feel this way, i always remind myself that i worked so hard during my preparatory year to get here and that is why i am here. i am at the university of notre dame because i belong here. i have always been an active member in my church as a religious education volunteer, retreat leader, altar server, etc., so i wanted to further my faith as i started school at yet another catholic institution. drawing from grotto network’s article, i reflected on the quote: “we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we only need to look around” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg – moreau fye week three). the moment i attended my first dorm mass on campus, i knew this would not be difficult at all. from praying the prayers of the faithful together to hugging during the sign of peace to dancing during the recessional hymn, my view of mass changed from an obligation to a want. i used to be an altar server because it helped me feel like i was a part of the mass rather than just sitting there. i wanted to do something to participate in dorm mass, so i asked to join the band as a guitarist. in doing so, i went out of my comfort zone, and it resulted in me finding a really fulfilling way to end my weekends. being a catholic university, there is so much more that notre dame has to offer. having not only the assistance of the resident assistants but also of the assistant rectors and rector has made feeling at home that much easier. in the classroom, i am constantly educating my mind with the rigorous classes and workload, but i am able to grow my spirit through many opportunities. from the residence hall communities to furthering my faith to joining clubs, all of these help me find meaning. carla harris said, “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage” (2021 laetare medalist address by carla harris – moreau fye week five). through notre dame, i have been able to find many things that i like to do. while in high school, i found myself doing some things that did not particularly interest me to fit in. now, i https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 vu 3 have come to realize that it does not matter who i am doing these things with, but rather whether i enjoy it or not because i will meet good people as long as i am my true self. one thing i love about notre dame is the fact that there is always a deeper meaning to everything. for example, i joined bengal bouts and while they do box, it is for something greater than that. the boxing is to raise money for holy cross missions in bangladesh, and it brings a smile to my face every time i realize the impact that i am making by simply being here at notre dame and doing things i enjoy. no matter where i go or how successful i am, i will never forget where i came from (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six). i am from many things, but most importantly, i am who i am because of how my parents raised me. they sacrificed so much for me to get to where i am today, so i dedicate my hard work to them. whenever its difficult to wake up at five in the morning for navy physical training, i remember the nineteen years of difficulty my parents had to go to. i remember the struggle they went through as vietnamese immigrants, sacrificing so that their children can live in a better place. i am also proud of my roots as a vietnamese american. i can relate to adichie as she says, “i realized that people like me, girls with skin the color of chocolate, whose kinky hair could not form ponytails, could also exist in literature” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau week seven). being here at notre dame, i set an example for my little cousins and nephews that they can achieve more in life. unlike our parents who had to any job possible when they first immigrated, we have the opportunity of growing up in america and having an education. this is not something we should take for granted, but rather take advantage of so that we can do whatever we want and live a meaningful life. notre dame gave me the opportunity to live this life because i will be leaving here as an officer in the navy and a degree in engineering. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau intergration 2 my transformative college experience and how i responded my first semester of undergraduate university has by far been one of the most transformative experiences of my life. not only have i learned many new things in my classes and how to live by myself, i have also discovered so much about myself, the world, and others. the cause for this new growth can no doubt be attributed to all of the new things i have encountered this semester. the way i responded to these new encounters has been shaped by my experiences at notre dame and is representative of the growth i have undergone. during my time at notre dame, i have encountered a lot of new communities. the first and most obvious community was the one surrounding my residence hall, but even within the dorm itself i discovered even more communities. communities, as i have discovered throughout the first semester, are the building blocks for creating an inclusive culture at the university. if it wasn’t for the amazing communities within my residence hall, it likely would have taken me much longer to feel like notre dame was my home. i’ve also learned that a very important part of a strong community is having strong leaders within the community. leadership within a community can take many different forms, and i believe that it is best described by parker j. palmer, “leadership for community requires authority, a form of power that is freely granted to the leader by his or her followers. (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j palmer moreau fye week 11)” an example of a strong leader within my community are the ras within my residence hall. they all care a lot about the community within the dorm, specifically making it a welcoming and inclusive place for everyone. one way they do this is by trying to make themselves available to everyone in the dorm as often as possible, and by encouraging everyone in the section they are responsible for to participate in dorm events. because these communities are so important to me, i have done my best to respond by being an active part in these communities, especially in leadership roles. i have also encountered brokenness during my time at notre dame. although they were sometimes difficult to face, while at notre dame i have had discussions about prejudice against others on the basis of things like race, class, culture, et cetera and what can be done to combat these issues. one important example of this discussion was during a mindfulness training session i attended with my friends on saturday. there we learned strategies on how we can be http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ more aware of the things we do that might unintentionally fuel brokenness within our notre dame family. the way i have tried to respond to brokenness is through love and understanding. this new attitude was fueled in part by a quote i read from father jenkins, “second, if we’re going to do battle with hatred, we have to accept for practical purposes that hatred is not out there. it is in here — ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction. (wesley theological seminary commencement address by father john jenkins moreau fye week 10)” another thing i have encountered at notre dame was adversity. whether it was the stress of an upcoming test, social anxiety, or the grief of being away from home, there were many difficult obstacles i had to overcome. responding to adversity in a healthy way is very important because adversity has the potential to cause immense sadness, or sometimes even trauma. i personally really connect with the way the church calls for us to respond to adversity: to see it as an opportunity for personal growth and rely upon scripture and your community for guidance. this idea is captured excellently in a piece by the campus ministry of notre dame, “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus. (holy cross and a christian education by the campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week 12)” the final thing i have encountered this semester was feelings of self doubt, partially as a result of some of the adversity i had to overcome. i remember specifically after a poor performance on my third calculus midterm where i began to question my belonging at notre dame. however, after i reflected and found support from my friends, i realized that i had been holding myself to an arbitrary expectation that didn’t exist. neither my friends nor family felt any less of me because i got a bad grade on one midterm. as julia hogan wrote, “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life. (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau in conclusion, my first semester of undergraduate study has been one of the most transformative experiences i have ever gone through, perhaps the most transformative in recent memory. as i mentioned in my previous integration, i believe that the purpose of life is to try to become the best version of yourself as possible. i believe that this can only be accomplished through undergoing incredibly transformative experiences and encountering new things. i look forward not only to the next semester of my freshman year, but also the rest of my time at notre dame because of how transformative my first semester was. i remember being very skeptical when my parents emphasized how important college was to a person’s growth as an individual, but now after my first semester i finally understand what they were talking about. i would not trade my first semester experience for the world, and i am so glad i was able to have it in such a great place and community, here at notre dame. moreau first year experience erik oswald december 3rd, 2021 how to walk and talk like a child of god this semester i’ve asked myself countless questions. i struggled with believing what is true. there was a moment a couple weeks ago where i could not trust anything that the world was saying because everyone has their personal biases. i felt lonely, felt displaced, unable to trust even my own thoughts. i wanted guidance, i needed a reliable mentor, in the end i just wanted real truth. then you ask yourself the question “where can i get truth?”, surely there is something i can go to on earth that would bring me comfort, a sense of understanding of what i should be doing for my life. thankfully, my father in heaven gave me his word, which is kept in the bible. this is where we should all go to for guidance in our lives because he gives you his promises, he gives you hope to live for, he answers your most desirable prayers in unexpected responses because he loves you. you just have to act in faith, believing that he will be there to guide you when you take that step. god does not need anything from us, our debt has been paid through christ. he just wants us to live by the account of faith, to live for his will. afterall, that is the most fulfilling most valuable thing you can do during your time here on earth. nothing else matters. living for fleshly desires, living for the world, living for anything else that is not for christ has no purpose. everything that we do should bring glory to god! now, this might sound like you have no freedom. it sounds like this is the life of a slave, i get it. but, then ask yourself the question, “what is true freedom?” is it doing whatever we want and any given time? is it being able to do anything you want without any restraint? this is not freedom this is being a slave to your personal desires and not allowing yourself to experience the true freedom that christ has for you because you’re too busy living for the world, too busy wanting what the world has to offer when you can have and experience something much greater. true freedom is doing what you were made to do. for example, if you wanted to dig 10 holes in the ground where each of them was five feet deep you would get a shovel and start digging. so you space out an area of land to dig these holes and your goal is to get all 10 done by the end of the day. digging a hole in the ground is a lot of work, you start to feel back pain, your hands are getting weary, and next thing you know you’ve spent half your day digging one hole. you realize that the shovel is not meant to be used for this amount of intensive labor. it’s certainly not impossible, but the shovel is meant for much lighter work. your neighbor sees you strain yourself all day trying to dig this one hole and asks you why you don’t dig these holes with an auger. augers are meant to dig multiple holes in the ground and their sole purpose is to make digging easier, especially in harder soil. perfect! so, you go to home depot, buy an auger, come back home, and try it out. it took you 30 seconds to make one hole and soon after you finish digging all holes in 10 minutes. you see, when we realize, what tools are needed to do specific things, life is much easier and freeing because you are using a tool for what it’s meant for. humans are the same. when we strive to live for our personal agendas, we do not get to experience true freedom because that is not what we are called to do. we all have a specific role to play for the building of the kingdom of god. when we strive to be like other people or live up to the standards of society, we are limiting ourselves and nothing that we do is ever fulfilling because it’s not how we are meant to live. we are trying to fit ourselves into a mold that is for something else. we are called to live for the will of god because he is our creator. the creator knows everything about its creation and there can be so much freedom in that. it is not extra work, rather it should be a new way of living, different from what the world tells you. believers in christ are called to stand out, not to fit into the world that isn’t even our own. i’m here temporarily, my citizenship is in heaven, i’m going to do everything that the lord tells me to bring more of his lost children home. how can believers in christ get to such a point in their life where they feel conviction over their calling in their life? we all do not just wake up one morning and understand what is truly meant to live for the will of god. it in fact starts the opposite way. in “advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmannmoreau fye week 9, she said, “loneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self-criticism: “i can’t find my place among these people, so it must be my fault.”.” she is coming from a place of dissonance, she does not feel like she belongs, she is unable to connect with the community around her. this is something that everyone experiences. i have certainly experienced this in the beginning of the semester. being stripped away from my church community back home and worried about not finding other christians on campus was a big worry of mine. not that it was impossible for me to stay firm in my faith alone, but it is a lot riskier to run a race by yourself. the first couple weeks of the semester were lonely, but i have never felt more closely connected with the lord in any other moment in my life. i only had him to talk to, he was the only one truly there for me in those moments and i continued to go back to him every moment of everyday during those first two weeks. i feel like he was wanting me to learn and to experience my need for him so that even when i do find people on campus no one can ever understand me nor complete me like my father can. after this time, god placed people in my life that i am so beyond grateful for and have established such firm friendships in christ. true friendships require a genuine interest and love for one another, wanting to out serve each other and not seeking benefits for yourself. this is such an important thing to understand and to experience and i have made it a mission of mine to love everyone i meet and to involve them in my friend groups because it would be selfish not to share the joy i have in my community. friendships are supposed to help bring one another closer to christ. that is why we fellowship. it should be more than have common interests, it should be an established community of people willing to bring glory to god in whatever we do. how can we glorify god in the midst of adversity through community? everything that we say or do should be with the intentionality of doing the will of god no matter the circumstance. the world is broken, confused, and desires a profound solution that fulfills moral obligation. in 13 ways of looking at community parker j. palmer says, “ in the face of resistance, an ungrounded leader will revert to bureaucratic mode.” (moreau fye week 11) this statement captured my eye in such a way that it made me realize that is what everyone unknowingly does in today’s society, unless of course, you are actively resisting bureaucracy. living in today’s society it is uncommon to want to stand apart. standing apart is known as something bad, strange, and foolish to desire. as followers of christ we are called to be different, sharing the gospel in the darkest places in the world and to love one another as christ loves us. everyone has some sort of morality when it comes to social issues but politics and fleshly desire to be greedy is what so often prevails in a world that so deeply need jesus. i do understand that using jesus as a cop out for everything might seem to simple-minded but if the world truly understood the meaning of the gospel, it would be much different. there was a statistic i saw once that said that 70% of american was christian. this is certainly untrue. the u.s. would be much more united if it were. but this is exactly what i am talking about when people don’t understand the true meaning of the gospel which is that jesus came to earth and died for the price of our sins. our sins. who are we to deserve this love? to deserve this kind of reward? we are nothing, we do not deserve it, we are sinners, and we are meant to https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ go to hell. but jesus paved a way to heaven, he made it possible to have a relationship with god, it is because of what he did on the cross that he deserves all praise. all that we can do is to continue to me messengers of the world and to do everything for his name’s sake. “he guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake” psalm 23 we should trust and rely on the word of god for his direction. therefore, we should respect and love everyone as said in 1 peter 2:17. this is how god wants us to treat one another! this is how we build community and have true freedom in life. the enemy is to blame for all hatred, deception, greediness, etc. so, it is our job as christians to actively fight against those lies. this is something i have encountered on campus. when i see other students in the classroom be fooled into believing that desiring personal security is okay. should the u.s. have intervened in the rwanda genocide? some students said no because it is not the united state’s responsibility for the lives of all people around the world. i believe that as humans, we have a moral obligation to care for one another no matter where you’re from. “i believe your faith can have a transforming effect on the world.” says fr. jenkins at the wesley theological seminary 2012commencement address (moreau fye week 10). this is true that your faith can have a transforming effect on the world. but knowing this and believing it in your heart are two different things. as believers in christ, we are therefore children of god. we are heirs of god (romans 8:17) i know this too be true but sometimes i do not really believe this in my heart because it sounds too good to be true. so i pray that god would help me with my unbelief. this is the same thing but for acts of faith. when i struggle to show an act of faith i pray that god would help me with my unbelief and he does and my faith becomes stronger and when my faith becomes stronger then i am a force not to be reckon with because god is guiding every action. it is important to acknowledge that you are broken first, humble yourself. it is a good reminder to acknowledge that we are not meant to live perfect lives and that we are promised hardships in our lives that will have us make mistakes and feel unworthy, but we are still beautiful inside and out because of what jesus did on the cross. god uses our broken pieces to create a mosaic. the lord calls upon broken people to allow his works and miracles shine through each person. i’ve seen god work in my life and has answered prayers during my time at notre dame. i have gone through loneliness, tests of faith, and anxieties. i firmly believe that god allows us to go through suffering so that we may understand and empathize with one another to bring glory to him. god does not say come to those who are successful, has everything figured out, but he does say come to those who are weary, who are broken and in need of our savior, jesus christ. for the unbeliever, there is so much to be said about how to find true fulfillment in your hope. some believe that there can be hope even if you do not believe in god, they are just fooling themselves. i say this with such directness because it is true and the truth should not be handled lightly. what happens for the unbeliever when they succeed in their hopes and dreams? it always follows up with another hope, another desire, something that actually gives them fulfillment. for the believer, this is found through faith, faith in god’s promises for your life. this is an everlasting hope, so much more fulfilling than whatever you can come up with yourself. “readers are advised to remember that the devil is a liar. not everything screwtape says should be assumed to be true even from his own angle.” -c.s. lewis, from the preface (july 1941) (moreau fye week 12) i believe that this quote is important to take apart to really understand what c.s. lewis is trying to tell his readers. when he says that readers are advised to remember that the devil is a liar it means that the devil is going to try to deceive you and tell lies to you so that you lose your faith in christ. the devil knows the bible through and through and he is going to use that against all people, especially followers of christ. he will come to those who are https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ file:///c:/users/nglez/downloads/the%20screwtape%20letters%20by%20c.s.%20lewis_chapter%208.pdf preaching the gospel and it is important to have discernment in your walk in faith because you don’t ever want to confuse the enemy’s lies and think that god is telling you these things. the enemy wants you to pursue your fleshly desires and that is where unbelievers think they can try to find gratification. the only true fulfilling hope we can attain is with christ and his promises. his word in the bible is more than enough to believe that this is true. no one in this world should be relied upon to give you the cheat code for life. when answering the question “how do i live and grow in hope”, it always comes back to whether you have any faith at all. when there is no faith, then there is no real foundation where hope can build itself upon. i say this because when you have faith in christ and have given your life to christ, then there is no need to worry about the future or about the betterment of your current circumstances because god’s plan always prevails. not to say that there won’t be times of uncertainty, even for the believer there are hardships, but we give those burdens, those worries, those anxieties to christ jesus because he is the carrier of all things and has already conquered everything. i had a hard time accepting that i had anxiety and to seek counseling for it in the past month at notre dame. i felt guilty for having it. once i gave this burden, this worry to him and trusting him that he will take care of it, i felt comfort. i felt loved. he is taking my anxiety and turning it into something beautiful, and i will be a testimony of that to whoever needs to hear it! martin intergration one martin 1 professor helm fys 10101 15 october 2021 manifestations of a notre dame student i believe that i do not have to fit into hustle culture in order to contribute to society...and i can promote a better society within the relationships i foster. brené brown, a self-identified, research-storyteller, describes her troubles with acknowledging the necessity of vulnerability in the journey to discover self-worthiness while simultaneously, very ironically, being vulnerable in front of an international audience. in the first lesson of moreau, brené brown describes what can today be acknowledged as “hustle culture”—an environment in which everyone must strive for absolute excellence without ever being vulnerable to our insecurities and faults. i have struggled with hustle culture all throughout high school, and it is still something that i struggle with today; however, the difference is that today i can acknowledge that i am holding myself to too high of standards. brené brown stated, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be, in order to be who they were,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). when i let go of hiding behind a mask, i was able to become the best version of myself because i was no longer lying to others, or myself, about how i deal with the day-to-day experiences in life. in the article from the grotto, the author stated,“attention is one of the rarest forms of love,” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four)many times students do not feel alienated in school environments, even if they are very involved academics, extracurriculars, or athletics, because hustle culture enforces a belief that an individual can always be doing more. however, by paying attention to my relationships with others, i can help mitigate their experiences with hustle culture by promoting vulnerability and acceptance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ martin 2 i believe that i am the creator of my own self worth...by letting my passions drive my actions. “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value,” (“should you live for your résumé...or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). this quote was read by david brooks, but the statement was originally created by joseph soloveitchik, author of the lonely man of faith, and this quote by soloveitchik perfectly describes a problem still occurring in modern society—the struggle between public accomplishment and internal self-worth. in his presentation, father kevin groves asserted, “our lives are not our resumes, it’s just being who they are,” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education ” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). the college application process exposed the ways in which i valued my worth, and i had, essentially, equaled my entire existence to the length of my résumé, the number of connections i had on linkedin, and the prestidge of my accomplishments. however, after a lot of self evaluation over the summer, i have come to the conclusion that i, not my accomplishments, define my self-worth, and that has led me to also decide that i will let my passions drive my actions rather than external pressure to live up to an image of the “perfect student”. in the poem i crafted for class, i wrote, “i am from a place where no one gets into high-list colleges...from a city of middle class people with middle class dreams...but i am from a dream to break the cycle,” (“what has formed me?” by moreau fye week six). in evansville, i was told i had too big of asspirations, that i spent too much time dreaming instead of facing reality. however, i know what i want to do with my life, and i know that my passions will lead me to where i am assposed to be—i know my self-worth. i believe that my searching for faith...one in which aligns with my morals. i grew up in a secular household, but my parents would never admit that. on documents or in front of friends, they would say we were christian—even though they forgot to have my brother and i baptized. the fact that i didn’t go to church like my friends, didn’t known about the bible’s origin and stories, and didn’t understand the basic concept of prayer weighed heavily on me while growing up in a very religious community. novelist chimamanda ngozi adichie explained in her ted talk presentation, “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy/transcript?language=zh https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ihnks_nnbbork8c65pg2to8b9xqefgozvpl8-w1vfue/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story martin 3 moreau fye week seven). i had a single story of religion that made me believe i could not be considered faithful because my perception of faith was different from those around me. however, as i look back now, i think being separated from the restrictions of religions in my community was the best thing that could have happened to me because it allowed me to ask myself what my beliefs could be instead of being taught about what my beliefs should be. i have an unorthodox relationship with my parents, and a part of that also means i did not learn my morals from my parents; instead, i was taught my morals by various ymca advisors—from people who did and did not practice religion. this separation allowed me to create my own values and association to faith without external influence, and it ultimately led to the person i am today. i am still searching for a definition or identification for my faith, but it will be one that aligns with my morals, not someone else’s morals that are pushed onto me to accept as truth. i take comfort in father pete’s statement, “the greatest journey you will ever go on, is one of self-discovery,” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). the journey, although light-years different from traditional student experiences, to find my faith is a part of who i am and how i interact with the world, and it is something that i will cherish. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois gil michael comuniello week 13 integration during my first semester at notre dame, i’ve encountered various trials and tribulations, including loneliness, racism, discrimination, and depression. however, with the help of my peers and my friends, i learned to pull myself, take a step back, and overcome the obstacles that stopped me from being my most fabulous self. at the start of my time here, i was unsure where to find my proper place on the notre dame campus. i wasn’t confident in my communication skills, and i was uncertain about making friends, mainly because i stuck with a small close group of friends for most of my middle school and high school years. i was certainly worried about getting along in a new community and new environment. i was apprehensive, considering i had no familiar faces to lean on for support. moreau taught me not to “look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (hogan). i had to learn to leave my comfort zone and be comfortable in uncomfortable settings to find my community and hope for my future at notre dame. initially, i was afraid of meeting new people and leaving my comfort zone because of conflict and dissonance. i was worried that i would get off on the wrong foot and be awkward in conversations. i also tend to be overly self-conscious about how other people perceive me. i was self-conscious about the impressions that i would make on others. i was self-conscious about how i would present myself. i had to learn to manage the dissonance within me. i learned to think less about how others perceive me and focus more on myself. i worked to be my own person and became much more proud of myself. i had to put my internal dissonance aside and gain the courage to face external dissonance. i learned that dissonance or “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (wesley theological seminary commencement). while i was nervous about meeting new people, i did my best to put myself there. i was constantly looking for opportunities to network and talk to people. i joined many clubs to find people of similar interests and did my best to find friends in my classes. i was finally getting out of my comfort zone. before i came to notre dame, i was well aware of the predominantly white student demographic. coming from los angeles, specifically koreatown, i was born and raised in a very diverse community. i was a little worried about how i would get along, especially as a person of color. i was also afraid of how well i would acclimate to a community with a different culture than the communities i had back at home. for example, i get homesick pretty quickly. i often miss my family and all the things they provide. when i miss home, i often also miss the food. food is a big part of my family’s and my life. my parents usually cook, so i also helped around and learned to cook. growing up, i experienced a lot of my korean culture through the cuisine. most of the meals i ate growing up were korean in origin. i would often eat rice with every meal and a korean side dish. so coming to college, especially at a predominantly white institution in a small city, i was unsure how well the food would treat me. now that i spent a semester with the dining hall food, i can say that i’ve found myself missing home the most in the culinary department. to keep in touch with my culture, i joined the korean club. hoping to join a community with fellow minorities, i also joined many other cultural clubs such as the filipino american student association, hawaiian club, and chinese culture society to experience the diversity that notre dame indeed beheld. i was able to put my preconceived notions of notre dame behind me by connecting with the other diverse students of notre dame. i learned that if i “embrace the spiritual potentials of suffering, then both community and leadership, human resourcefulness and the capacity to hold it in trust, will prove to be abundant among us” (palmer). through the first couple of weeks, i spent a lot of time putting myself out there and meeting new people. i tried my best to find another close group of people similar to my friends back home. i was desperate to find a community that i could call my family. i struggled to see this community that i wanted to encounter throughout my time. the dorm-centric nature of notre dame’s social culture made it difficult to find a close group of friends outside my dorm. it also didn’t help that i didn’t really fit in with the guys in my section or dorm. however, once i put myself out there to different people in different clubs, i found people who felt the same way. i stuck with a group of really amazing people from various dorms and became really close friends. although i’ve only known my current friends for only a couple months, i genuinely feel like i’ve found a family at notre dame. the new friends i found were very different from those i had back home. however, because of all the time i spent with them and the memories i made, i feel connected to them more as a family rather than friends. the new family i made also made me feel at home since this group reminded me of my family at home. because of this community, i feel much more connected to notre dame and much happier and healthier. “in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope.” (holy cross and christian education) having found my group, i found it less necessary to constantly go out every weekend at parties to meet new people. instead, i found it more important to spend time with this family and create lifelong memories. now that i have found my family at notre dame, i have great hope for what my future holds for me. i’m excited to meet new people and discover new opportunities and create deeper connections with my friends. i found hope in seeing how we would all grow together as active advocates for change in our communities. i hold great anticipation for what my friends and i will do in the future, not only at notre dame but also on our separate paths. works cited hogan, julia. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. holy cross and christian education campus ministry. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/. palmer, parker j. “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal.” center for courage & renewal, 25 feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. “wesley theological seminary commencement.” office of the president, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/. integration two moreau moreau first year experience 30 november 2021 utilizing the notre dame experience this semester has been filled with many trials and tribulations for me. navigating both school and relationships within a college environment is an experience that has resulted in a new understanding of myself. some questions i’ve been forced to ask include: why am i stressing about imaginary expectations? how can i best utilize all of the opportunities handed to me by simply being at notre dame? where do i find my most wholesome relationships? all important questions in their own way, and i’ve been dealt with attempting to find the answers. i find it necessary to separate myself from my grades. when the general population was asked about “none of them tell me that they believe they are living a fulfilling life when they let their self-worth be defined by these external expectations.” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). it's completely unfair for us to determine our own self-worth based on unrealistic things. i personally used to always become incredibly upset and anxious if i ever received a grade less than an a, because i thought that i was disappointing my mom. however, she never expressed the slightest disappointment in my grades, she just wanted me to be happy! i’ve realized over time that i’m the happiest when i’m doing things i enjoy without the expectation of being the best of the best. all that matters is if i had a good time and felt like i was being my most authentic self. it’s hard to separate myself from my grades on this campus because i’m always surrounded by others who value them incredibly higher than i do, because i feel like i’m doing something wrong. when i begin to base my self-worth off of my academic accomplishments, i start to become more introspective. sometimes i need to find ways to channel my more negative emotions. in one of our readings, i learned about kirsten helgeson, who uses kintsugi, a japanese art, to channel her inner turmoil stemming from the negative encounters she’s had from being a woman. she says “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week 10). people are going to channel their emotions differently. i personally enjoy talking about my problems with people i know and trust, but i understand that some people are unable to do the same due to the severity of their situations. i think it’s wonderful that others can find ways to confront issues, such as the kintsugi as demonstrated by kirsten helgeson, and through having larger discussions as a community on how to collectively deal with bigger problems. having an open space for people to collaborate according to their own comfort is incredibly important, and i’m still https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ searching for a way to do this through the notre dame campus. i have utilized the mcwell rooms, which gave me a space to relax and breathe. i’ve met many different types of people from all different backgrounds. through this diverse campus, i’ve been able to listen to other people retell their experiences, and i’ve learned a lot about the struggles they’ve faced compared to my own. professor agustin fuentes details this, saying “if we are willing to embrace the spiritual potentials of suffering, then both community and leadership, human resourcefulness and the capacity to hold it in trust, will prove to be abundant among us—gifts we have been given from the beginning but are still learning how to receive.” (“diversity matters” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). we can all learn from each other when it comes to discussing our personal struggles. diversity in conversations is incredibly important because it allows us to hear about different experiences and reasonings as to why someone may have a different perspective on life. i am not a member of the community that has faced many problems due to the demographic i belong to. my privilege has left me blind to many issues that a lot of my friends face due to them being different racially or ethnically, because i grew up in a bubble filled with people that looked just like me. i now find myself surrounded by a variety of people, and i’m always thinking of ways i can be a better ally for them to have a comfortable experience here on campus. one of the best parts of my first semester experience has been meeting all of my professors. this campus was founded on the principles of maintaining healthy relationships between staff and students. father moreau “recognized the need to maintain a deliberate balance between firmness and leniency in dealing with students. he intuitively understood the difference between being a teacher-mentor and a hovering ninny; good teachers avoid fighting small battles and liberate their students to soar rather than quashing their spirits.” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james king moreau fye week 12). moreau believed in nurturing healthy relationships between faculty and students where professors can encourage their students to grow academically. he also understood the importance of boundaries between the two to ensure some level of fairness and growth in maturity. i agree with father moreau, i think it’s good to establish healthy connections between teachers and students. in my experience, the classes that i have a good relationship with the teacher in have always been incredibly more enjoyable, and i happen to do well in the class later on. i’ve had some classes with teachers who created a negative environment for their students, and the grade point average for those classes were always lower than the ones that were enjoyable. the theory that being kind and welcoming to your students makes them harder workers is entirely plausible, and it has been proven time and time again. overall, the notre dame experience has shaped a new mindset for me, and i’ve become more empathetic and understanding towards others. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471?module_item_id=109281 eppler 1 professor wagner 3 december 2021 moreau encountering & evolving here at notre dame, i feel as though i have become a better version of myself. i am at liberty to take control of my life, to make friends with people similar to me, and to fill my free time with activities that i am passionate about. i have learned so much—about myself, the world around me, and things i have yet to fully understand. i have encountered a multitude of people, experiences, and events that have changed me so much within a matter of months and helped me to evolve into the best version of myself. i have encountered diverse stories, and i will embrace them all with open arms. notre dame is one of the most diverse places i have been to, especially since my previous schools and hometown is made up of mostly white people from a similar socioeconomic background. in my first semester, i have encountered so many different people with unique nationalities, races, ethnicities, families, and cultures—and all of them with different stories to tell, just as i have a unique story to tell. my roommate is from honduras, my friends down the hall and in my economics class are from brazil, the funniest girl i have ever met is from china—and the list goes on and on as i continue to meet new people. as the klau center’s video explains, “every story is a testament to personal truth.” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by the klau center archive on race – moreau fye week eleven. i hope to respond to these diverse stories by respecting each of them, even if they seem strange or different. after all, what makes us https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ eppler 2 special is what makes us unique. i hope to cherish all of the diverse experiences i encounter, as well as share my story as well. i will ask polite questions if i am curious, but never judge different experiences. and i will try to be more understanding of those who are curious about my story as well. we are all but a sentence in the book that is notre dame—and each of us has a different story to tell. i should not judge any one else’s personal truths in the same way i wouldn’t want mine to be judged. with all of this diversity often comes divisions. because there are so many differences between peoples at notre dame, i have also encountered prejudice and biases, especially towards different racial and socioeconomic groups. i will respond with taking actions into my own hands and taking a stand, especially by verbally countering prejudice beliefs. i have also seen a clear divide between different groups, especially between the americans and the international students. through my experience with my friends in the latino community, i have heard of the different views that both the americans and the latinos have towards each other. both of their views are very stereotyped and narrow minded. i hope to take a stronger stance by questioning these beliefs when they are presented. i am reminded of fr. jenkins words, in which he noted the unique calling of notre dame students, saying that “you here today, more than others, have the responsibility, and the training, and the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today—the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. jenkins – moreau fye week ten). i not only have a responsibility as a catholic to promote unity and acceptance, but a special calling as a notre dame student. if notre dame is to be a force for good, then i must take part in countering biases and prejudices. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ eppler 3 along with these external conflicts, i have also encountered a great number of internal conflicts, especially through the high expectations i set myself. it is easy to get caught up in how other people are doing—how celia from down the hall completed all her homework for the next two weeks, or how jasmine found her husband already at domerfest. it is in my nature to create large, looming expectations of what i should do in order to become successful and satisfied with myself. however, i know that by setting unrealistic expectations, i will tire myself out, always going on an uphill climb. as julia hogan writes, “there’s often no threshold that puts these feelings to rest,” meaning that even achieving our expectations will often not lead to satisfaction (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). i will respond to these expectations and these feelings of disappointment in myself with instead a positive praise of something good i have done. maybe, instead of achieving my expectations, i have actually done something better for myself. for example, i did not do all the homework i needed to do over thanksgiving break. but, instead, i spent some very much needed time with my family and watched a tv show for the first time in forever. instead of scolding myself for not meeting my expectations, i can instead praise myself for taking time for some self-love. when encountering unrealistic expectations, i will respond with focusing on something good i have done instead, helping me to evolve into the person i want to be. these internal conflicts often amalgamate into large, looming worries. i have encountered suffering and stress, but ultimately, i know that everything is left up to god. being at college, far from home, family, friends, and familiarity has challenged me in more ways than i expected. i often find myself overwhelmed with anxiety and missing my sisters and my warm bed (and single bathroom!). i have also been challenged in regards to my faith life. while i still attend mass every sunday, it has been hard for me to keep up with my spiritual and prayer life, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau eppler 4 and i have had my faith challenged. but, in the small moments when i go to take a breather at the grotto or attend milkshake mass, i always feel more at peace and more relieved. i know that no matter how stressed i am, or how badly i did on an econ test, or how much drama there is between friends, as moreau himself says, “all is swallowed up in victory,” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). at the end of the day, the most important part of my life—more important than my major, my career, and even my family—is my relationship with god. and since jesus has already conquered death, my struggles are trivial in comparison to what he has done for me. i must remember to use this perspective of god’s great love for me to help ground me and keep me at peace. i will choose to respond to my struggles by not falling weak, but staying strong, and taking my problems in prayer to god. i have encountered so many things here at notre dame that have changed me, for better or for worse. ultimately, i will take all of these encounters and use them to help evolve myself into the person i most want to be. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 moreau first year experience integration one 15 october 2021 vulnerability, failure, and gateway: the resilience to overcome gateway was hardly my first choice. when i first received the letter, i thought to myself “i didn’t get into notre dame, time to focus on other applications and move on”. at that time, i didn’t see myself going to notre dame even if i had gotten in normally. it was by no means my first choice, and i was not very upset, more so just disappointed that the first decision i received in the college application process and ultimately disappointed that i had to face rejection, since i had supreme confidence that i was going to get in, even if i didn’t attend. i forgot about gateway for a while, focused on applications to in-state california schools that i was set on attending. but with the covid-19 pandemic altering grades and testing, record numbers of applicants, and being stuck on jam-packed waitlists, admission to the ucs became increasing difficult, and i ultimately did not get into any of the uc schools i applied to. this was a source of real frustration, i was on some waitlists, but the odds were slim, and they ultimately didn’t work out. i knew i was highly qualified, knew i could have gotten in, felt i should have gotten in, felt lost and upset. the rest of the college application process seemed like a daze. what am i going to do? it was at this point where i first started to revisit the idea of gateway. at the end of the day, it was one of my better options, and even though i wasn’t in love with the idea of notre dame, especially considering i would have to spend my freshman year at holy cross, i ended up committing to gateway unsure of what was to come. i clicked ‘accept’ on my offer hours before the deadline, and here i am today. the reason i share my unique and winding road to get to the gateway program was because i, along with all my gateway peers, took a risk coming here. it was nobody’s first choice. we all had other plans, but we took the bold steps to do something that was difficult, something that was different, to ultimately achieve at a great university. we faced adversity in coming here, and we continue to face adversity, as we will inevitably always be different from those who were admitted regularly. we face adversity now, required to find off campus housing for our sophomore. but we can face this adversity. we have the strength to overcome any challenge here within the holy cross and notre dame community, and we demonstrated this strength by saying yes to gateway. herein lies my self-belief statement: i believe that in accepting gateway, i have demonstrated my personal and mental strength to overcome obstacles, make myself vulnerable in uncertain situations, and that i will ultimately grow from the experience. having the self-belief to know that we can always overcome will prepare us for our journey of self-discovery better than any easy path ever could. essential to overcoming adversity on our journey of self-discovery is vulnerability. i made myself vulnerable in coming here, and to integrate into this community, i open myself up to others and allow myself to be vulnerable. in her ted talk, “the power of vulnerability” brené brown says “i know it’s seductive to stand outside the arena…and think to myself ‘i’m gonna go in there and kick some ass when i’m bulletproof and i’m perfect’—and that is seductive—but the truth is, that never happens”. (qqc week one). this idea of vulnerability applies especially to us in gateway as we try to overcome. while i do have the confidence that i will dominate and succeed, but we still must allow ourselves to be vulnerable in the times of uncertainty that will inevitably arise in order to most authentically grow on this journey of self-discovery. we have had to make ourselves more vulnerable than most as gateway students, for we are coming face-to-face with the idea that we ‘may not be good enough’ for notre dame. this vulnerability is essential to growth, and allows us to know ourselves, recognize our strength in adversity, continue our journey of self-discovery. and in balance with this vulnerability, i still maintain that confidence. i do not need notre dame. i am not desperate to go here. i am here to learn about myself and dominate and succeed along the way, always standing up again after getting knocked down by failure. in his address to incoming freshman, fr. pete says “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matter is authentically responding, to the best of your ability to the person you know yourself to be.” (qqc week 3). though he is addressing all notre dame freshman, his message especially resonates with those in gateway. we face a strong test of character by taking the risk to come here, which necessarily requires self-reflection and faces us with failure that we must respond to become the best we can be. our path to self-discovery is not easy, but, as fr. pete demonstrates, it is such an important journey that failure a step along the way. on the idea of failure, carla harris says in her 2021 laetare medalist address, “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson. a lesson that may be one of the most important things that you learn in that season of your life”. (qqc week 5) again, we are to view failure not as something to be feared, but something to learn and grow from. failure often gives the most important lessons in life, and we grow and change more in the face of adversity than when everything is easy. we face adversity of gateway students, but in taking up the offer we have shown our resilience and willingness to overcome in the spirit of carla harris’ words. this resilience and ability to overcome is essential to our self-discovery and prepares for all challenges we will face in the future and is ultimately rooted in vulnerability. we must be vulnerable to fail, and face failure to become stronger. vulnerability not only illuminates the idea of failure, but also speaks to how we can grow our minds here at notre dame. in her ted talk “the danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie says “when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.” (qqc week 7). we often have predisposed ideas of places because of a single story written by those in power, but that often suppresses a myriad of diverse viewpoints. rejecting the single story illuminates new perspectives from which we can expand our horizons and grow our mind. this rejection of a single story, rejection of our predisposed beliefs, requires vulnerability. it takes immense strength to set aside our perceptions and listen. we must make ourselves vulnerable to being wrong, and only then can we truly learn and change. learning new ideas and hearing new stories that may replace what we thought we knew is key to our journey of self-discovery, and we can pursue this intellectual growth here in the notre dame community through our vulnerability. vulnerability, failure, and resilience in the face of adversity is central to our journey here at notre dame, and our experience as gateway gives us an opportunity to test this resilience. made ourselves vulnerable in accepting the offer. we face the challenge of not getting housing, staying resilient and positive, and growing from this obstacle. the challenges we face now will only make us stronger and allow us to fight on in our pursuit of self-discovery and the education of the mind and heart here at notre dame. week 8 integration one sanya jain 1 it is never the e(nd)ing, but just the beginning! a question i often wonder is what are root beliefs? root beliefs are the core faith we have that drives our life decisions. these core beliefs can be determined in the past and altered by our situations in the present or future. personally, my root beliefs shape the person i am today and a lot of the credit goes to the university of notre dame, the place i now call home. entering the gates of this university helped me understand the nuances of my personality, delve deeper into understanding my choices and transform me into the person i am today. i believe that i grow by recognizing and understanding my strengths. coming to a place far away from home was challenging and the first time i stepped out of my comfort zone. unaware of the strength of this community i was coming to, i was nervous and scared. however, since i have come to the university of notre dame there hasn’t been a moment i have felt that i don’t belong here. i believe that finding a place to belong is the stepping stone to understanding the kind of environment one finds comforting. the feeling of belonging and having people i could go back to at the end of the day to rant made me feel less lost in a new country. however, one important quality i learnt through the process of adjusting to this new environment was putting my guard down and being vulnerable. initially it may seem like vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and one’s struggle for worthiness, but it is also the birthplace of joy, creativity and relationships. personally, the lack of vulnerability i showed was simply a defense mechanism which prevented me from situations i believed were shameful, scary or hurtful. this was only until i got to notre dame where i realised the importance of this quality. it made me realise the importance of vulnerability in fostering new relationships as it allowed honest conversations to flow which helped build trust. vulnerability allowed me to follow my heart sanya jain 2 without overthinking the consequences, helping me come up with new ideas and solutions during group meetings. lastly, the feeling of being vulnerable, even though it is scary, lets me feel free. it lets me feel free from the judgements of others as i know that in that moment i am my most authentic self. i was able to understand how to convert my fear to my strength which helped me grow and will continue to help me in my journey ahead. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1 ) self-knowledge is the act of recognizing these strengths. for example, i was able to distinguish between my eulogy virtues and resume virtues. in the constant haste to achieve my career goals and dreams, i often focused on building my hard and soft skills that would help me in the corporate world. for example, at the university of notre dame, the first thing i did was research clubs and activities that would boost my resume like sibc. instead, the thing i learnt over time was that more than developing these skills (which are important), it was time i focused on the virtues that would help people remember me, get to know me and love me for the person i am. coming to a place far away from home, made it important for me to build relationships around me so that i would feel less lonely. this was the reason why i began exploring beyond my resume virtues so that i could show my true personality to develop friendships around me. understanding my eulogy virtues helped me understand important strengths such as kindness, humbleness and honesty which helped me grow as a person and as a friend too. (“should you live your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week 2) lastly, another strength that i was able to recognise is my most important strength sticking to my roots. similar to the experience that chimamanda ngozi adichie had, i also faced slight racism. many people have asked me how i have learnt to speak english so well and whether i studied abroad. however, the reality is that english is my first language back at home. even https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim sanya jain 3 though not intentional, there is a presence of implicit biases which sometimes does feel weird. the fact that chimamanda ngozi adichie didn’t let the stereotypes people held about africans affect her but instead grew more fonder and embraced african culture is something remarkable. such incidents may have demotivated me (especially when someone at a party asks how i have heard “american” music), it taught me to grow and embrace my culture more. it allowed me to reflect on my learnings and maintain my cultural roots. this was evidence of growth as it allowed me to look beyond these stereotypes, find my strengths and discover how important my roots were. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) i believe that the community that surrounds me shapes me. an important part of my upbringing is the place i am from. i am from the city of dreams mumbai. this place and people from here have shaped me into who i am. staying for two months in a forgein country made me understand the influence of indian culture and this city, helping me realise the strength of the influences i was surrounded with. through the “where i am” poem which i had written, i was able to explore and reflect on these influences. i am from the city of dreams, where the fast-paced megacity never fails to surprise me. i am from the city that never sleeps! i am from the chaos that echoes through the city, while the waves splash on the coastline. (mumbai, is often referred to as the city of dreams since it is the financial capital of india. living in mumbai taught me how to adjust to the fast paced life and always try to keep up. the beauty of this city is that it is filled with different types of people different races, incomes, and origins, yet the strong culture brings everyone together. this is why this city has grown on me and never fails to surprise me as everyday i learn something new. ) https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story sanya jain 4 i am from the boiling summer heat and the humid climate, that has now become my comfort. i am from the bustling streets where street vendors attempt to sell their products, while teaching me the importance of respect. (one of the most famous parts of mumbai is the street shopping. the bustling streets are always crowded and packed while everyone is trying to get the product they desire. even with so much rush, i learnt the quality of respect from the people i have been surrounded by. there is never a time that these street vendors are looked down upon because they often provide essentials to us. regardless of the income status, everyone shops their groceries from these vendors and it was nice to see the gratitude that each and every individual had ) i am from the city where there is inequality allowing me to understand different walks of life. (a fun fact is that mumbai is the place where the richest man in india stays and also the place where the biggest slum in asia is present. this is evidence of the inequality that exists. this disparity has given me first hand experience into learning from people from these different walks of lives. learning from my house help who has farms back home taught me the hardworking nature of every person even though they weren’t receiving much income. having conversations with my watchman every morning for school gave me insights into how hard he worked so that he could feed his family. having conversations with businessmen taught me how they are attempting to dominate the market place and what goes through their minds. from the poorest people whose main aim is to feed their family to the richest who want to get richer one thing remained the same which was the hardworking nature as each person worked their hardest to achieve their goals. ) i am from my friends who have taught me the importance of loving with compassion. sanya jain 5 (my friends taught me the quality of love and compassion. the feeling of being away from them has made me understand their influence in my life. they form a major part of the community i am surrounded by and have shaped me by teaching me the quality to love, to care and to be happy for each other.) i am from my family who allowed me to grow into the person i am today. (my upbringing has always been a key influencer. my family (the community i was first introduced to when i was born) helps me grow into the person i am today by teaching me virtues like honesty and loving selflessly) i am from god, the one who gave me life and a meaning that is motivating me to do my best every day. (i do believe there is a supernatural force (almighty) which has created us. i also believe that he created us for a purpose and keeping this in mind i am motivated to try to do my best everyday. my family has always had a strong faith in god which they passed down to me. from praying everyday with my grandma to waiting till my festivals come to enjoy with my family, my beliefs in god have just grown over time giving me purpose in life. ) i am from my home made of love and dreams and not from a house made of walls and beams. (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6 ) i recently questioned myself asking does the community really shape the person i am today. the community back home definitely shaped me, but now that i am at the university of notre dame can this community shape me today. the university of notre dame has a vision to shape the mind and hearts of the students. with the catholic community, i was not sure if this same belief would hold true as i grew up in a hindu environment. however, coming to university of notre http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html sanya jain 6 dame did make my root belief stronger as this community has started to influence and shape the person i am today. the letter written by edward sorin to father general moreau – the founder of the holy cross congregation gave me an insight into how this community that is shaping me was discovered and nurtured through all the struggles. despite all its struggles the community has been able to foster an environment where the heart and mind is being developed. through my interactions with people i have been able to align myself with them, learn and grow more values that the notre dame community promotes. in my opinion the core values promoted at notre dame are excellence, respect, integrity, teamwork and accountability. through every aspect, in particular the moreau classes, i have learnt each of these through discussions i have had with my peers. it allowed me to understand them and their situations better which gave me a deeper insight into the vast diversity of people who each had their own characteristics. this learning from others has shaped me today as i have developed the capability to understand and respect others which has helped me be part of this new community, thereby shaping my personality (which align with the notre dame core values). (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842 (pages 1-6)” moreau fye week 5 ) i believe that i am searching for a framework. all my life i have been searching for a framework but have not been able to do so. i often wonder how people find a framework for life because life is so complicated and unpredictable. the answer i came up with eventually was life doesn’t have a framework and there is no particular rule book to follow life. it was during the moreau class where we discussed faith as a framework to life where i wondered if that was true for me. faith and belief is something that definitely shapes the person i am today. after that classroom discussion i realised something. faith is one of the qualities that adds a certain type of https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view sanya jain 7 framework in one’s life, even though it may not be the framework in itself. every individual has a different set of beliefs and story of faith. reading the student’s voices on how everyone’s faith was fostered in the “student’s reflections on faith at notre dame” article, i was able to reflect on the same questions that everyone answered in context to myself. for me faith is important because it gives me a foundation upon which i live my life and make decisions. faith matters because it has the ability to hold my family together as we all have similar beliefs. lastly, faith matters because it makes me feel closer to the divine power that is present in our universe. i am still not sure if faith has formed a framework for me, but i am on the path of discovering if it has. (“student reflection on faith at notre dame” moreau fye week 3 ) i also think that relationships are a part of this framework. there are two kinds of relationships good ones and bad ones. the toxic relationships are often a part of life’s framework, even if they shouldn’t be in an ideal situation. coming here to the university of notre dame made me interact with all sorts of people. i have had many friendships in my life, but coming here made me ponder if i would find any real friendships. i have had friends who don’t listen to me, bail on me and use me to get good grades. coming here i wanted to eliminate this toxic element and tried my best to make healthy relationships. i am glad i made friends eventually who talk positive things, listen to me, stay with me, are genuine and want just love and respect for me. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t taylor moreau fye week 4) while these two elements make part of the framework, i am still trying to find elements that fit in so i have a framework with which i can live life and make the right decisions and choices. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ sanya jain 8 this is just the beginning of discovering myself, my root beliefs and how they are changing with time. it is never the ending as there is always belief in everything one does. jack bailey 8-24-21 moreau first year experience week 1 qqc focus question: one focus question that stood out to me was “what are my root beliefs?”, because an important part of the college experience for me is truly finding out who i am. i want to stay true to myself while also growing as a person, and establishing a set of core beliefs can be the foundation to self-improvement. question: how can brown’s findings be applied to the life of a college student? quote: i found it interesting when brown said, “and now my mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live is with vulnerability and to stop controlling and predicting”. she had spent many years learning how to properly research and control her data, yet her project showed that, sometimes, you have to do the complete opposite. this makes me understand why she decided to receive therapy, as this must have rocked both her work and personal lives. brown’s research proved that being orderly and controlling may work in her field of study, but not with the human heart. comment: personally, this was not one of my favorite ted talks that i have watched. i thought brown spoke too much about her professional work, which caused it to be somewhat hard to relate to. if she shifted the focus of her talk to her findings rather than how research works, i think i would have taken more away from it. however, i did enjoy whenever she spoke about her discoveries. her examples were especially helpful, such as one waiting for a phone call or a mammogram scan result. i think i’d be much more able to apply this to my own life if she went into more depth about her findings. mfye integration 2 emily mcdougall oswald moreau fye 12/03/2021 questions of reflections it’s hard to believe that i am now almost done with my first semester of college, and an eighth of the way through my undergraduate career. so far, this semester has been one the most challenging, rewarding, and shaping experiences of my life. i think that one of the most terrifying parts of this semester was the idea of coming to this brand-new place, and being completely isolated and alone. my high school was full of people i had known all my life, all but two of whom would be coming with me to notre dame. south bend was entirely new waters, something i hadn’t really experienced since the first day of preschool. there had always been a safety net, a group of familiar faces to sit with, friends with years of context and inside jokes. i knew that i was going to have come into college with a desire to make new, authentic relationships, and go beyond myself to reach out to others – terrifying. but eleven weeks after welcome weekend, and the whirlwind of introductions, we looked at community in thirteen ways that resonated with me. of these thirteen, the statement that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally,“ clicked within me (thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewalby parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i’ve been on that side where you are trying so hard to break into a group, and you just can’t seem to get on the inside of it, or the conversation is more of a leaky faucet than an easy, steady flow of laughter and friendship. when i went home for thanksgiving break, i got to see my old friends, restarting that flow of familiar jokes and stories as we caught each other up on our college careers. and yet, as i saw friends i had known for most of my life, i felt like i was seeing what could have been. there was a path where i would have gone to the same state school as the majority of my high school friends, and stayed in my bubble. and to be honest, there were times this semester when i was struggling, and wondered if it would have been easier to have stayed home. i would be tired, struggling to keep up with deadlines, or just plain homesick, and i would think why did i come here? why did i choose this? in week 12, we read the screwtape letters and in the irony of screwtape’s advice, i found advice that made me rethink my mindset about these struggles. “it is during such trough periods, much more than the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be,” screwtape tells his nephew (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). the trough period felt much more prevalent in the whirlwind after fall break, but this quote reminded me that such periods are necessary for change, as uncomfortable and lonely as they might be. one of the most defining parts of these troughs for me would be the loneliness. i’ve been lucky enough to find a great group of friends here at notre dame, but those relationships are still new, and in times of struggle i tend to turn inwards. it’s something that i’m working on, but on hard days i often find myself sitting alone with my thoughts, sometimes peacefully sitting at grotto, other times holed up in my dorm room. different types of loneliness, but still a feeling that was isolating and hard to overcome. i would feel guilty about these periods of melancholy – http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ i have friends after all, and i’m lucky enough to have people to turn to when i know it’s hard to find those connections after all. but as emery bergmann said in week 9, “your loneliness is not failure, and that you are far from being alone in this feeling. open your mind and take experiences as they come.” (advice from a formerly lonely college studentby emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). in high school, my loneliness was a source of embarrassment for me. embarrassment that i always felt slightly outside, circling a group i was a part of but never fully inside of. but this quote made me ask myself if these situations i would find myself in were loneliness or actually a place of solitude. once i started seeing the times when i was walking by myself, or taking a social break, or just being in a place by myself as opportunities to sit with myself and breathe, i felt much more at peace with solitude. i love my friends i have found here, and i’m glad to spend time with them – but i’m also okay now by myself. i’ve spent of lot of the last semester asking questions, some of them trivial, and many of them stupid. the most interesting problems arose in my history seminar. every tuesday and thursday, we study the complicated legacy of columbus and the murals depicted in the main building. i started the class with strong beliefs, knowing where i stood on controversial monuments and how they stand in our history. the class made an interesting argument about the trouble with assigning modern morality past historical figures, especially the ones we have decided to memorialize. as time went on, i found myself questioning the previously black-and-white opinions i had held on things like controversial statues. while i certainly do not agree with the belief of the confederate generals, my history professor argued that all parts of our history, both honorable and shameful, should be represented, even if we may not agree with it. my previous stark ideas started to blur, which made me think of this quote from week 10: “even in the case of my most noble belief, i must ask myself: am i trying to advance this belief through persuasion or coercion, with respect or contempt, by accepting sacrifice or imposing sacrifice? when i refuse to compromise, is it because i love a principle, or because i hate the people on the other side?” (wesley theological seminary commencement | office of the president | university of notre dameby fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). i think that father jenkin’s perspective on how to view our beliefs is an important practice for checking our biases in order to grow. i think that this semester has helped me learn to be even more open minded than i would have said i was in august. those beliefs that i had held going into the seminar became more nuanced, more aware of the repercussions of trying to gloss over history. i am not the same person who came to this campus four months ago. it’s weird to look back, and see how much i have changed, both emotionally and mentally. at the same time, i feel like i am the most authentic version of myself that i can be. these questions that i have been asking – who am i? what is important to me? what do i believe in? – are part of this reflection on my identity and my path forward. i’ve never been satisfied with the surface level. i’ve always been an overthinker, a what-if-er, always curious to see what could have been. but even as i reflect on what was and what could have been, i can see how i got here, and i feel so excited to see where i will go. however, i don’t plan to stay in this reflective state. i want to continue to open my mind to different perspectives and experiences in the rest of my time at notre dame. specifically, i am going to try and make time to go to more speaker events and try to take classes that are going to challenge my beliefs and make me think more critically. i am https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ also going to continue pursuing the real, authentic relationships that have made this semester so enjoyable. i won’t ever stop asking questions and reflecting, because it helps me move into the rest of my college experience and my life with a better understanding of my identity. that practice is the foundation for a better, more authentic future. integration 2 moreau first year experience dec 3, 2021 encountering adversity: my experiences with living in the light throughout my first semester in college, i've encountered massive changes and challenges. i’ve also experienced a lot of positive connections and learning experiences that have shaped the beginning of my college experience. moreau has served as a learning space to explore how best to respond to these massive life changes and adjust to notre dame. specifically, this integration will address how i’ve encountered self doubt, challenges to my beliefs, and struggling to choose hope. through this adversity and the lessons of moreau, i’ve been able to respond to these challenges and seek self love, conviction and a life lived in light. doubt is a normal part of life and an emotion i often feel when i don’t trust in myself. my encounters with imposter syndrome and self doubt helped me learn vulnerability and find community with my peers. i took stats as a senior in high school during the peak of covid. chicago public schools had decided to stay closed until april of that school year, meaning i was completely remote for three of the four quarters. while i did well in the class, i never felt confident in my math abilities. this semester, i took statistics again. while i was familiar with the content of the course, i was not comfortable with actually solving the problems. i struggled in the class, and felt very alone in that struggle. my expectations for myself began to shift from straight a’s to b’s and c’s. the imposter syndrome i was experiencing was caused by an unfounded feeling of failure and lack of belonging or accomplishment (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). however, i soon began to learn that my classmates and friends were also struggling with classes. the first time i felt solidarity was when i went to office hours at the beginning of the semester. i saw a handful of my classmates there and they were asking the same questions that i was. much like the women making kintsugi pottery, our common struggle allowed us to be kinder to ourselves (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). our natural instinct is to hide our weaknesses and insecurities. during week 9, we learned about pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately but think we're alone in this thinking because we don't share our fears(“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). however, once i realized that many kids in my class were struggling, i was able to be more open about needing help and my confidence in math and self love greatly improved. this november, my friend and i led a divestment march at notre dame. we were organizing because notre dame invests a large part of its endowment into fossil fuels. this is extremely harmful for the environment and people, specifically low income and communities of color who are disproportionately affected by climate change and environmental racism. i love my notre dame community, and by standing by my convictions, i’m working to improve this place i care for so much. i was so honored my friend asked me to co-mc with her. this was a big moment for me because activism has always been extremely important to me. during week 10, we discussed the value of catholic social teaching and critical race theory. in the assigned article, the need to address systemic violence and oppression is of the utmost importance, not just in critical race theory, but also when addressing climate change (“should catholic schools teach crt” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau week ten). to have a valuable role in this march meant i was actively seeking this systemic change with my peers. we spent the week before preparing our scripts and coordinating with students in the student government sustainability department. on the actual day of the march, it was extremely cold and there was a light snow. it was so affirming to see people still come even though the conditions weren’t great for marching across campus. the other speakers and the student’s in attendance made their voices heard and stood up for our catholic community values. during week 11, we delved into the foundations of building a community. something that really struck me was the second of the “thirteen ways to build community”. the author writes, “a capacity to resist the...forces with names like narcissism, egotism, jealousy, competition, empire-building, nationalism, and related forms of madness in which psychopathology and political pathology become powerfully intertwined” are essential to building community (“13 ways to build community” by parker j. palmer moreau week 11) . this felt extremely relevant to this march because we were trying to improve our community by pushing our school to think of vulnerable communities and the environment, rather than investing in something so harmful. while it's extremely challenging and upsetting to know our endowment money is hurting our community, this experience has forever changed me. i want to continue to actively seek change and work towards improving notre dame with my peers. my experiences with building meaningful connections during welcome week have pushed me to live in the light. welcome weekend can best be described as a roller coaster of emotions. i spent a lot of time crying to my mom during welcome week, feeling extremely hopeless about finding home in this new place. everytime i’d meet someone new, i’d immediately bond with them over something generic or superficial, but once we’d run out of surface level topics, the conversation would die out. this social wall i kept running into was because i was unable to make meaningful connections with my peers. the overall lack of vulnerability in these exchanges hindered me from making satisfying connections, which i now realize is a collective experience for freshmen (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). in moreau, we were able to engage in group conversations talking about our fears and stressors in college. whether we were struggling with homework, roommates, or making friends; we were able to relate to one another. through this exercise, we were able to find a sense of hope. the mission of the holy cross is built on this idea of hope, which heavily shapes our education. hope ties into this as the motivator to continue to strive for this goodness. moreau wishes to equip and armor us with an education and the tools to persevere. hope is what keeps me going when i see upsetting things in the world or in my own life. it's also what drives people to seek salvation, a hope for a second chance at gaining access to heaven (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau week 12). with this newfound solidarity with my peers, i was able to start making deeper connections. i could begin to embrace the diversity of thought and background that comes with making friends in college. i would’ve never met so many different people from different states, upbringings, or points of views had it not been for notre dame. my life is so much more enriched because of these new friends and the hope that pushed me to find them. in conclusion, my first semester of freshman year has been a learning experience. these weekly lessons have enhanced my understanding of community, emotions and values in a way that i've been able to apply to my life. my encounters with the challenges of adjusting to college have pushed me to confront problems with vulnerability and conviction. through the guidance of moreau, i’ve been able to develop as an individual and become a part of this college community. after this semester of learning, i will continue to strive to live in the light. microsoft word integration final natalia soto.docx moreau fye integration december 3rd, 2021 my journey through notre dame throughout the semester, i’ve encountered several experiences, people, and lessons. but, more importantly, i’ve encountered my true goals, and expectations for my life. i feel this is key for my success since this way, i can work to achieve the person i aspire to be, and in doing so, i can get closer to encountering my true self. fortunately, i have an excellent place to start this self-journey, my new home, notre dame. since i arrived at notre dame, i've tried to focus on getting better academically and spiritually. however, in the beginning, the process wasn't so easy. my first lectures were challenging since i felt i was behind everyone else, and often, i couldn't participate in class because i felt i wasn't at the same level as my classmates. this started getting to me because i was convinced that if i got the opportunity to attend a prestigious university like notre dame is, i needed to be perfect. here i encountered something called impostor syndrome, which made it really hard for me to keep up. i just wanted to quit my classes, and i couldn't even see the positive side of these opportunities. some weeks went by, and i started talking to my advisor and some friends who helped me realize that it is okay not to be perfect and that i should not put that kind of pressure on myself because it would not lead me to anything good. moreover, they told me that of course, the process of starting in a new place would be challenging, but i should look at it with a positive mindset instead of with that feeling of being less prepared or capable. i can relate this experience with the content we saw in week number nine about impostor syndrome and imperfections. as julia hogan stated in ((why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit moreau fye week nine), "remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we'll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn't have to end when that happens". this goes accordingly with what happened to me; i got frustrated for not being "perfect," which isn't even the point of being here. however, thanks to the community notre dame offers as well as the resources and constant reminder that we should work hard while accepting ourselves the way we are, after some weeks, i understood how this obsession with pleasing expectations and being 'perfect' could get in the way of my own authenticity and character and changed my mindset to a more positive one. now that the semester is ending, i can proudly say it worked; the feeling of being behind disappeared, and now i feel i can take advantage of all the university's fantastic opportunities and do my best job to succeed. furthermore, i feel i can relate the topic mentioned above with being broken. just like it is okay to be imperfect, sometimes it’s also okay to feel broken. this is because by being broken, we are growing and becoming stronger than before. as grotto said in (women find healing through kintsugi workshop – moreau fye week ten), “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” this quote stood out to me because i feel that understanding how brokenness is a part of living is vital for our growth. sometimes people think that because they feel broke, everything is ruined, and there’s no hope for them. however, that’s not true, and that’s why i feel this quote is so important because it recalls how even though we feel hurt when we are broken, we need to understand that in the end, it is brokenness what it’s going to help us become a better and stronger person. i’m grateful that i’ve encountered this topic of brokenness throughout my journey at notre dame because it seems very relevant for my personal growth. moreover, it helped me realize something significant about happiness: if we haven’t experienced real brokenness, it’s harder to feel genuine happiness. i think we won’t appreciate joy that much if we don’t know how it feels when we don’t have it. i’ve felt brokenness before, and i used to be ashamed of those moments, but now i know all those moments have helped me grow and become more resilient and stronger. now i can appreciate more the wholesome moments and be grateful for the good times. another aspect of great importance that i’ve encountered during this semester is diversity. i feel diversity is significant for our lives because it makes us more open-minded and it expands our knowledge, as stated in (diversity matters by prof. agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven), “so exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to make a change.” additionally, it helps us grow and progress in different ways and see things from a different perspective, which is sometimes necessary for our growth. thus, i feel that by rejecting others’ perspectives, we are closing ourselves to new possibilities and ideas; we are getting stuck with the same things as always instead of learning and accepting new and maybe even better things. since i arrived at notre dame, i can say i’ve given the opportunity to meet new people, from different places, with different cultures, perspectives, and religions. i feel this has strengthened my acceptance of diversity as well as expanded my knowledge and mind. i’ve come to like this experience very much since i feel i’ve grown so much from the first day i got here. furthermore, i feel every day i learn something new, and with the community that notre dame offers me, i feel i’ll be able to keep growing in many ways. that is why i’m grateful i’m attending a university that recognizes the importance of diversity and encourages us to keep embracing it. finally, i would like to talk about hope and faith, which i believe are two essential components for our path towards god. “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to nd how even the cross can be borne as a gift.” (hope holy cross and christian education by james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). i chose this quote because it represents the kindhearted image of god. this god, which i follow and base my life upon his ideas and beliefs. believing that darkness can be transformed into light and that all the “bad things” that happen have a solution or at least a reason for happening brings hope to my life and opens my eyes to different possibilities. it makes me each day more certain of my faith in god. moreover, knowing that through god’s path and guidance, i’ll be able to be closer to him and become the person i’ve always wanted, fills my heart with so much faith and hope. after all the topics we’ve encountered, i feel this has been one of the most powerful. it reminds me of how faith and hope give us strength and, in the end, are what provide real meaning to life. thus, knowing i’m attending a religious institution as notre dame, makes me feel safer and reminds me that i can turn to religion and faith in the worse times and that it’s hope what will eventually allow me to keep going forward. as the holy cross text mentions, adversity makes us stronger, and even though sometimes hardships may arise, through hope and faith, we’ll make it out stronger than we’ve ever been. recognizing the importance of living a life based on hope and faith will lead us to a reality full of endless possibilities for joy, love, and improvement. after everything i've encountered during my days at notre dame, i'm proud to say i believe i'm following the correct path towards the life i seek. i'm grateful i understood the importance of accepting we don't need to be perfect and that it is okay to feel broken at times. furthermore, i'm thankful to attend such a prestigious university in which diversity thrives. with that kind of community surrounding me, i can understand the beauty of diversity and work on getting better at it each day. moreover, by the hand of hope and faith, which are vital components of this university, i can educate my mind as well as my heart. thus, the journey i've encountered since the first day i arrived here has made me grow in many aspects. the different experiences, qualities and lessons, i've gained from the university have made me realize the person i want to be. and with the notre dame education, i'm confident i'll continue this journey spiritually and academically, educating my mind as well as my heart. bibliography (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto moreau fye week ten) (diversity matters by prof. agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven) (hope holy cross and christian education by james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve) integration one.pdf what moreau has taught me i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable. brene brown emphasized this root belief in her ted talk, the power of vulnerability, as she said, “the thing that underpinned this was excruciating vulnerability, this idea of, in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i saw so much truth in this, as i got to truly learn and experience this when i first came to notre dame in august. i knew close to no one and i had to make all new relationships and friendships. i changed schools my freshman year of high school, so i had to do this same thing four years ago, but that seems like forever ago, so i forgot what worked best for me on how i made my high school friends i currently have. that is why i had to experiment and try different ways on how to make connections. it has been about two months since we first came to school, and the friends i am still hanging out with are the ones that i was vulnerable with. these friends are the ones that related to me when i was being vulnerable because they experienced the same thing or felt the same things i am feeling. for example, i was talking with a girl in my dorm and i told her i always had trouble making friends and she said she had the same problem. with this, we got closer, and still hang out everyday. there is so much power in vulnerability, as we expose our true and authentic selves. i believe that it is important to acknowledge our faults and use this to determine the person we want to be. after watching david brooks’ ted talk, should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?, i put much thought into who my true self is and how i want to live my life. brooks introduced the idea of the two adams, and how one side of us is selfish and the other is good and moral. (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) it is important to realize that we do not need to feel bad that we possess both “adams”. it is normal to want things for ourselves or to have temptations. my root belief states that we need to acknowledge these feelings and differentiate them with the other adam that displays goodness and morals. in differentiating them, we can now determine the person we want to be. we can prioritize what is more important, and in doing so, we can find our true selves. i think this root belief is so important because it helps me make the right choice in any hard decision that challenges my morals and ethics. i believe that we have the power to change a bad situation into a good one. throughout the years, i developed this root belief through my experiences in the past, and it was cool to read that professor david fagerberg believes this same thing. he said in his article, faith brings light to a dark world, “ when the lighting changes, what i can see changes.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three) this is basically what my root belief is saying, as you have the ability to change your perspective, and i believe this because i use it in my everyday life. for example, if i have a really big test for college, i get frustrated and stressed and want to give up, as i stay up all night studying. however, when i think about how fortunate i am that i attend this great institution and that i am able to take this test in the first place, i see the positives in taking the test, which helps me get through it. changing perspective does wonders on how we see the world, and helps us get through hard or difficult times. i believe that we, as a community, have a responsibility to keep each other safe. in the video made by notre dame students from week four, one of the students said, “assault can happen to anyone. anywhere. by anyone. so it’s on us.” ("it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" by nd moreau fye week four) this is one of my root beliefs because if i were in a bad situation and i needed help, i would want anyone to help me get out of it. it is important to realize that in those situations, no one specifically is responsible to help. what i mean by this is that if you see someone being assaulted, there is no one to help her/him except for you. knowing this, it helps us realize it is now everyone's responsibility to help. a big reason why people don’t help is that they do not want to get involved, but that is just being selfish. everyone has the responsibility to protect each other in our community. i believe that i have the opportunity to choose my future. this is one of my stronger root beliefs, as i know that this will help me get far in life. carla harris, the laetare medalist award winner, said in her speech, “you have power. each and every one of you,” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five) and when she said this, it really hit me on how true it is. i have been so blessed throughout my life, especially being able to attend notre dame. and with this, i am set up where i have the choice on what i want to do with my life. i have the power to choose who i want to be, and with this, i know i need to work hard and not take for granted the blessings i have been given. only i can determine my future, so i need to put in the work and be grateful i was given this opportunity because many people aren’t allowed this privilege. i believe that my parents had a big influence on the person i am today. i have this root belief because i see so much of them in myself. i have my humor from my dad and my sleeping habits from my mom. also, it makes sense why this root belief is true. i grew up with them for 17 years. they took care of me and spent the most time with me, so it makes sense that their habits, personalities, beliefs, and values have rubbed off on me. when i was writing my “where i’m from” poem from week six (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six), i saw much truth in this root belief. i had to think of who or what influenced me throughout my life, so i thought maybe my friends, old school, church, soccer, and family relatives, but i came to the conclusion that my parents had the most influence on me. i believe that my community and i should strive to learn new perspectives. chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk explains exactly why we need to strive to learn and be open to hearing new perspectives. she talks about how her roommate felt pity for her before she met her because she was african, and the only story her roommate knew about africa was “catastrophe” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this preconceived opinion wasn’t to hurt adichie, but was because her roommate had no knowledge of anything else about africa other than hardship and suffering. her ignorance is what led her to preconceived opinions about adichie. it is important to realize that stereotypes do not define who we are. we are our own people with our own stories, so it is important to strive to learn more about others and to hear their experiences and stories. this will broaden our perspective and help us understand the world better. this root belief also inspires what i want to do in the future. i want to travel the world, as i know i will learn new perspectives and cultures that i am not fully exposed to in the united states. i am from hawaii, and thinking about it, it is so small compared to the rest of the world that is out there. there is so much more to learn to broaden our perspectives, which is why this root belief is very important to me. moreau integration 2 moreau integration 2 growing from change coming to notre dame, i expected the demographics to be fairly similar to my hometown. i knew that notre dame was predominantly white, similar to my hometown. i was fine with this demographic because it was all i ever knew, growing up in an affluent, homogenous new york city suburb. however, upon coming to notre dame i was pleasantly surprised to see that notre dame had a bit more diversity than i had thought, though notre dame is still not a generally diverse school. nevertheless, i have a great appreciation for this increased diversity. since being here, my horizons have been broadened. i’ve been able to hear countless different stories about the struggles of racism and discrimination from my non-white friends at notre dame. though i’ve heard a plethora of stories about racism, whether it be in the news or in history class, it becomes much more personal when i’m hearing my friends talking about how they have personally experienced racism and how they experience struggles everyday due to their race. the link between diversity and awareness about the extent of racism is emphasized by professor augustine fuentes when he says, “it changes, race and racism are malleable, alterable. that is in fact why we should care about diversity” (“diversity matters!” by professor augustine fuentes moreau fye week eleven). while i understood that diversity was important prior to coming here, experiencing even just the slightest increase in diversity has broadened my perspectives and opened my mind, making me more aware of the struggles that other races face on a daily basis. this is something that i believe i had to experience first hand, it’s not something that can simply be talked about or read about. in the future, i look forward to surrounding myself with even more diversity, as i plan to live in a city once i graduate. along with the more diverse racial demographic, notre dame also has an extremely diverse political demographic which has opened my mind and made me more willing to accept other viewpoints. at notre dame, the political climate is very interesting because it’s pretty evenly split, unlike many other colleges in the nation. this can be a major cause for conflict, since the political divide is so harsh across the entire nation, as father jenkins emphasizes when he said, “ now, when the country is increasingly diverse, when the number of disputed moral questions is rising, when citizens have deep and opposing passions that neither side will give up for the sake of civility — can citizens of the united states learn to express their convictions in more skillful, more respectful ways?” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week ten). while political differences can cause division and tension, differences in opinion can also be great for personal growth. i’ve found that my friend group here is at all different points on the political spectrum, which has led to several political conversations. recently, my friends and i had a discussion about the capitol riots. despite having varying viewpoints and opinions, we were able to have a calm, polite conversation about the events. we were able to listen to what each other had to say and really consider if we agreed with each other. the variety of political opinions here at notre dame has allowed me to engage in healthy political discussions. i’ve been able to expand my opinions and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ accept new opinions because of the political conversations i’ve had with my friends. this expansion of my mind and beliefs is something that i hope to continue as i become more immersed in the political landscape at notre dame. while the demographics at notre dame have allowed for much personal growth, the culture at notre dame has also promoted personal growth. being one of the top schools in the nation, it would be reasonable to assume that notre dame would have an extremely competitive environment. i’ve heard the horror stories of other schools where you can’t even leave your homework on a table without someone coming to rip it up, however at notre dame there is a very encouraging, collaborative, and supportive environment. in high school, we were all used to being at the top of our class. i know that i personally put an enormous amount of pressure on myself to have perfect grades and to stay towards the top of my class. however, coming to a school where everyone is very strong academically, we can’t all be at the top of our class anymore. this can cause crippling imposter syndrome and make us feel as if we don’t deserve to be here. elizabeth cox describes this phenomenon by saying, “since it’s tough to really know how hard our peers work, how difficult they find certain tasks, or how much they doubt themselves, there’s no easy way to dismiss feelings that we’re less capable than the people around us” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). though imposter syndrome is very real and it’s something that i feel at times, the culture at notre dame has been great at combating these feelings of self doubt. the first day of welcome weekend, my ra had a talk with my section about imposter syndrome. she was incredibly reassuring and repeatedly reminded us that we belong here and that we are equally as capable as all the other students here. the culture at notre dame reinforces a line from c.s. lewis that says, “their nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). though notre dame is academically rigorous, we are constantly reminded that we all have our ups and downs, and we belong here nonetheless. this reassurance has given me much more confidence in myself and my abilities. it allows me to take steps like participating in class without fearing that my answers will be wrong. this confidence in myself and my intelligence is something that will continue to grow with time, as i keep adjusting to school and recognizing that i am qualified to be here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo&ab_channel=ted-ed https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625?module_item_id=107420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190625?module_item_id=107420 moreau capston integration: moreau fye 29 april 2022 my personal mission statement my main mission in life is to always serve as an example of christ’s love for his creation and as a vessel for him to use for his glory. through this, doing everything for god and relying on him for strength and guidance because his will is sovereign. in doing so, i pursue inclusivity, empathy, and compassion in all areas of my life in the act of love. through all of this, i will be an advocate for the under privileged and work in accompaniment to ensure i am living in empathy and compassion toward a better tomorrow. as a current college student, my mission is to take advantage of the opportunities that i have at notre dame and use them to advance the gospel and work toward a career in social service that will assist the underprivileged in the united states and potentially in other developing nations. my life is more than just career success, it is about serving others and acting in accompaniment towards those that i serve. in all that i do, jesus at the center. integration 1 1 integration one due 10/15/21 roots: the foundation that sprouts the future very rarely do we acknowledge just how influential our roots and core beliefs shape our everyday lives. root beliefs are central, driving values that push us onward and upward. whether it be to accomplish certain goals, drive relationships, or navigate self-acceptance, root beliefs act as the catalyst at the heart of existence. i like to think that there are three major root beliefs prevalent in my life, especially so as i continue to acclimate to my new home at notre dame. searching for intellectual blossoming, growing through failure and unintended experiences, and pursuing truth through vulnerability are what shape me. who i am and who i hope to become revolves around these root beliefs, and they provide direction in my ever-changing life. i believe that i am searching for intellectual blossoming. i have always looked for the bigger picture when it comes to education. i want to find the topic, the class, the lesson that captivates me to the point where i never check the clock. i firmly believe that if you are truly passionate about something you are learning, it will blossom into something equally rewarding and intriguing. the first time i first stepped into chemistry class in high school and the first video i ever watched about stem cell research were significant, blossoming moments in my life. they made me realize how truly possible a future career in such fields could be, and they truly taught me that such moments are defining, inspiring moments on the path to intellectual betterment. i truly believe that is why i am here at notre dame. attending meetings for my neuroscience major and the compassionate care in medicine club left me feeling the same way and reminded 2 of a quote from week 3. “you tend to think that you are being kind to them when they are really being kind to you. they love you more than other men do, but they need you less.…they will usually seem to have a lot of time: you will wonder where it comes from” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). i firmly believe those that have intellectually blossomed and found their passions exhibit this kind of behavior. they walk around with a sense of exuberance and warmth, and i have seen it everyday from my professors and faculty across campus. i truly hope that by the time i leave here i experience even a fraction of the passion that these individuals exhibit, doing so by flourishing in intellect and knowledge. i believe that i grow by failing and embracing unintended experiences. the common saying, “failure is the best teacher” exists for a reason. i honestly can't think of one time in my life where my greatest successes weren’t first failures, especially when it comes to my notre dame story. i was initially deferred when i applied here, and it is no secret that very few students are accepted later after being deferred. yet, i continued to put my nose to the grindstone and pour my heart and soul into my application, and i was later admitted. getting into notre dame was truly the proudest moment of my life. i still continue to struggle now that i am here, but i learn everyday from it. for the first time in my life, i am receiving b’s on assignments and barely passing tests, and it was hard for me to cope with. yet, each shortcoming teaches me on how i should prepare better, focus more, or operate differently, an attitude that reminds me of week two’s topics. “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths. adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses” ( “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” (david brooks, tedmoreau fye week 2). my goal is to build up both adam 1 and adam 2, and i have made significant strides with adam 2 since i’ve gotten here. by learning to look at a lower test score or https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105874 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105874 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105844 3 project grade as a learning opportunity rather than a failure, i have become infinitely more happy and at peace with myself. embracing unintended experiences has been equally fruitful and growth inspiring. i have always been an extremely pessimistic person, perpetually finding something to complain about. yet, part of growing is acknowledging shortcomings and making active strides to change. i found that thinking pessimistically was a shield of sorts; i would never be let down if i expected the worst and would then be happily surprised if things worked out. i now realize how harmful a constant negative mindset could be, and discussion in week one explained it perfectly. “you cannot selectively numb. when we numb those, we numb joy. we numb gratitude. we numb happiness, and then we are miserable” ( "the power of vulnerability" by brené brown, tedxhoustonmoreau fye week 1). i have learned that i have to embrace both the good and the bad equally, allowing myslef truly expereince both and come out better from it. moreua fye has taught me to acknowledge when i am uncomfortable, feeling down, or hurting and move forward with an open mind. for me personally, that has been one of the most fruitful changes in my life since i have been at college. i believe that i pursue truth through vulnerability. such a dichotomy seems very ironic, but few times in my life have i experienced purer truth than when completely vulnerable. something about embracing my true, most basic self is both calming and enlightening. the problems and winding paths of my life suddenly seem a little less daunting, and the path to proceed becomes clearer. all it takes is that one leap, step, or jump to embrace the uncomfort and truly let yourself be vulnerability. i have personally felt a lot of positive feedback from topics discussed in moreau fye, as topics of approaching vulnerability have frequently come up. “we cannot love the god we can’t see if we don't love the brother that we do see” (“two notre https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105814 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105814 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 4 dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c.moreau fye week 5. there is no doubt that much of my faith and being a catholic is being completely vulnerable and opening up to god. belief in god itself is dependent on a blind trust in someone you can’t see or tangibly feel, yet it is an incredbily rewarding relationship. so while working on phyiscal relationships like fr. grove says is still important, embracing a vulnerable relationship with god is something i have learned to be paramount to my life. i have also learned that vulnerability when it comes to admitting my mistakes leads to a greater truth output. “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’ by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week 7). acknowledging failure and weakness goes against who we are as humans, but it leads to important discussions and a better future as seen in our implicit biases discussion. truth comes in many shapes and sizes, and vulnerability is a neccesary driver. i hope to continue embracing this root belief in my life as discussions in class continue, as i know productive and enlightening lessons will come out of it. with root beliefs shaping my future, i look to the future with optimism and excitement. i know that having notre dame as a medium and so many faculty and staff to guide me along the way will developed me into the man i hope to be. i expect that as the moreau fye continues, i come to learn and understand more root beliefs central to who i am. college is about self development, and there is greater place to do it than debartlo hall 336 at 3:30 on tuesdays. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106072 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/106072 integration 2 .pdf integration 2 boylan 1 professor catherine wagner moreau fye 3 december 2021 freshman year four years later: adapting lessons for a new life freshman year of high school; what is universally known as a massive change in a teen’s experience in academics, social life, and relationships, always has a mixed bag of feeling associated with it. my freshman year of high school started fairly normal; i was one of 90 students moving up from middle school so i had somewhat of a headstart in knowing friends and the general curriculum structure. classes were going well, i was meeting new people, and making new friends, everything i expected from the first few weeks of school. all that was missing was sports. i was too small to go into what had been my fall sport of choice, football, so i decided to spend that fall training for hockey. therefore, when i was cut from my school’s hockey team, i scrambled for something to do. what this led to was my friend group getting me to do wrestling with them. i was somewhat familiar with the sport, watching my older brother captain the team the previous year and having some experience from on and off participation on my town’s team, but i was honestly just eager to do something for the winter season. i couldn’t sit around for another three months. luckily, i was in a great position to learn the sport, surrounded by friends, a phenomenal coach, and supportive upperclassmen who wanted to do nothing but help me perform at my best. however, what proved to be my greatest weakness was something as simple and common as acne. wrestling with acne was a battle all in it’s own. grappling with an opponent, playing defense on the mat, or even rolling over from the stomach pressed on the back and chest, 2 creating a lot of discomfort. therefore in an attempt to remedy this and allow me to continue the season without these troubles, i was put onto accutane. accutane is a very common drug and is considered the solution to most cases of severe acne. however, my response to the medicine was anything but common. what started as an expected flair-up when first starting the prescription blew up into a severe condition with fewer than 200 documented cases. i lost weight, the acne on my back made it impossible to wear a backpack without unbearable pain, and my joints ached to such an extent that i questioned if the short walk from my bed to my closet was possible at times. this disorder threw what was going to be a normal second semester of high school out the window. for the rest of the year, i found myself carrying a backpack in one hand through the halls, painfully walking from class to class and carefully maneuvering the stairs trying to prevent my knees from buckling. it was during these times that i questioned if i was a normal high school student. none of my peers had to go through these struggles, and none of them looked crazy carrying their backpacks in their hands. however, when i was able to take a step back and look beyond what i was going through at the moment, i was able to battle these feelings of imposter syndrome through the positivity and support i received from my now lifelong friends, wrestling team, and family (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). although i may have been knocked down by this reaction, i was not alone in getting back up and beating it due these amazing people in my life. moving forward four years, i’ve entered a new freshman year here at the university of notre dame. this experience shares many parallels to the stresses and discovery of freshman year of high school but includes moving to another state, away from my friends, family, and previous support groups. as a result of my previous freshman year experience, i’ve recognized the importance of friends and relationships to bring me up when i fall. therefore in my new https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo 3 environment, it’s imperative i find a group able to do just that. luckily what has been made clear here at notre dame is the bond and sense of community i can have with other students that i don’t even know. as parker j. palmer states in his “thirteen ways of looking at community”: “whether we know it or not, like it or not, honor it or not, we are embedded in community” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). luckily for us at notre dame, we’re in an amazingly supportive community basically whether you like it or not. but most students came here knowing of this environment and therefore they only add to the good it does in the life of peers. however, as warm and amazing as the campus-wide community may be, i cannot in confidence turn to a stranger when i need a shoulder to lean on. what this has brought me to is my goal to find a group of lifelong friends that can support me like my friends at home once did. however, it’s important that i find the right people to surround myself with. i’ve recently realized the need to analyze the impact that a group may have on me. no matter how one may put it, we all act in ways to try to adapt and fit in with the group of people we hang out with. i’ve been guilty of this many times here at notre dame while trying to meet people. the danger of this basic human nature is that falling into a group of like-minded individuals may result in, as father john jenkins puts it, shunning the others, playing the victim, blaming the enemy, stoking grievances, and never compromising (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins moreau fye week 10). this groupthink leads to a toxic environment for the individual and the university’s culture. so to properly satisfy this need for a supportive friend group, i believe i should surround myself with different experiences and stories. not only will this result in me expanding my horizons, but it will also allow me to listen to other perspectives to assess and question my own http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ 4 beliefs in hope of finding a more educated outlook. as father james b. king states: “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place. the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week 12). if i’m able to demonstrate sacrificial willingness of mind to my friend group and gain new perspectives in the process, then i can be confident in demonstrating sacrificial willingness of the heart in reaching for those friends when i may be struggling. this would prove that i have found a life-giving group. i know that with a support group like this, they’d help get me through to brighter days even if i go through anything as severe as my medical episode during that freshman experience only four years ago. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration 2 moreau fye mike integration 2 12/3/21 developing a broad(y)er understanding of life the first couple months of my college career consisted of a few, simple things: excitement, failure, and disappointment. this is quite evident in the rocky, decreasing line that i drew from august through october on my “high-low” chart (moreau fye week twelve). after i managed to get my feet under myself, i have had the opportunity to explore both the benefits of excitement, and the benefits of disappointment. specifically, i have questioned my current path, accepted the absurdity of perfection, and developed a balanced group of friends and future roommates. overall, i have taken my experiences from the first half of the term--the good ones and the bad ones--and reviewed them so that i may continue on a path that is best suited for my beliefs and desires. in high school i rarely engaged with the school community beyond those who could help boost my “adam one” side. in short, i “only tried to build on [my] strengths” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). coming to college, however, i promised myself that i would begin to focus on things other than my resume. while it is a little more difficult, it is much more https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim satisfying. when i tested this method out by doing absolutely no homework on the first gameday, i felt like a different brody...i felt like an imposter. i was at one of the top colleges in the world, and i was spending my first free weekend tailgating and partying from 10 am until 10 pm. the day after, i looked back and felt like i “hadn’t really earned [my] accomplishments” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). although it felt weird, i kept forcing myself to engage in events around campus: section football, interhall cross country, s’mores with flaherty, bp syr, and more! i finally reached a point where i feel comfortable doing something other than working toward an end goal 24/7, while also maintaining that inner drive to become a dedicated, compassionate doctor. this “new” brody lifestyle proved to be quite beneficial. in my week nine reflection, i mentioned how i related to the feeling of a “lonely college student” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine)...yeah...it took about three weeks for that to change. to be fair, at that point i was in the midst of the “october dip” that was a common low on many individuals’ graphs during week twelve. fast forward to about a week ago: i was sitting in my dorm room with three of my good friends talking about how we need to secure the “meat locker” for next year, a four-man room with a lounge area that not many people know about. looking back, it was these guys that i had fantastic experiences with at football games, in the dining hall, in sub, and in duncan’s two-four, all within the last two months. my mindset about notre dame and its prestige completely changed. it was quite an amazing feeling to realize that i could balance work and play...that i could “play like a champion today,” both in academics and in friendships. for the future, i am https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html confident in my ability to achieve a perfect (at most times) balance between having fun with friends, and working hard in school. while this balance between work and play has become clearer to me, other things have not. i am still unclear as to why i constantly feel like a nerd that is regularly being beat up by a bully whose name is “chemistry 10181.” i put more effort into this class than any class i have before by a longshot. this hard work, however, is never displayed in my exam scores. this course is the only task that i have faced wherein genuine, hard work barely contributes to one’s success. i explained my situation to my dad, and all he said was: “i gave you hard-working genes, but not the super, crazy, smart genes like those doing well in the class have...but i think you are smart enough to know you need out of that class because an average of a 60 on an exam is simply absurd!” throughout my struggles with this class--which got worse as time went on--guys from my dorm continued to demonstrate their understanding. one sophomore who, like my future self, dropped biochemistry asap, went out of his way to put me in touch with one of his friends who was currently a chemistry tutor for the learning resources center. i have gone to meet with him in coleman morse every tuesday for two hours since that initial meeting. the individual in my dorm comforted me, and pushed me to be better. “i need people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau week eleven). although i am still struggling, this kind deed made me feel as though i was not the only one in my boat. previously it had felt like i was a member of a one-man crew. this sense of community struggle gave me comfort that i http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ had not experienced before. from these struggles, followed by this warm embrace, i have grown to accept what happens in life for what it is: failure happens, and i need to accept that i am far from perfect, and so failure will inevitably come. like father john jenkins said, regardless of “the many demands of [chemistry 10181] pushing [me] in other directions,” i have to “push back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). having had this experience, i am now fully aware of the close, resourceful community around me that loves one another for who they are--failures and all. on the topic of community, i have come to a revelation that people at notre dame genuinely want the best for you. specifically, i have also answered a major question i had coming into college. my high school was a very prestigious, competitive school. kids would ask you “what did you get” on nearly every assignment you ever took, ranging from a spanish coloring sheet to the sat. i absolutely despised people when they asked this question. at notre dame, however, i have rarely experienced that. one would think at such a highly-regarded institution, everyone would try to beat everyone else. while that may be true in interhall football, it is often not the case in the classroom. before coming to notre dame, i knew that everyone sought success; i did not know, however, that everyone wanted to see their peers succeed to the same extent. i had a recent experience that truly exemplified this notion of community support. about one week before spring term class registration, i received an email from a sophomore in my dorm. “underclassmen scheduling extravaganza monday in 2-4” read the email. he had gathered together a band of upperclassmen https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ from various majors to help freshmen pick the most interesting classes, best teachers, and preferred time slots. i sat down with an upperclassman who was also pre-med and he gave me “the lowdown” for the next year and a half of my academic career. these upperclassmen spent over an hour of their time helping random freshmen pick out their classes. i doubt many of my friends at other colleges have this opportunity. this “extravaganza” furthered my understanding of what the term “notre dame family” truly means. i will keep this in mind for the rest of my notre dame career, helping out the incoming freshman in the different ways that i can. i also hope to keep this example in mind throughout my future plans as i move on with my life, not forgetting to help those entering into a new journey behind me. none of these revelations over the past couple months came to me through intense search. rather, they came to me through natural experience, along with a sense of hope. in fact, i am still searching for a lot of answers. these blank spots in my future do scare me. however, it is my newly discovered sense of hope that “make[s me] stronger and prepare[s me] for harder challenges in the future” (“hope-holy cross and cristian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). it was not until about a month ago that i could say i am confident with where i am in my college life. ultimately, throughout the second half of the semester, i have grown to accept failure side by side with those around me. and when i do fail in the future--and i will--i can always remember: “a setback is a setup for a comeback” (willie jolley). https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ week 8integration one ms. wagner moreau fye 10/15/2021 walking through the narrow gate 1. i believe that choosing a harder path is better i cannot say that this is something i have followed perfectly throughout my life. to point out an obvious example, i am likely transferring out of engineering (for other reasons, not difficulty, i should add). i can skip workouts or have too many cheat days, but in general i usually try to “enter through the narrow gate” in life. the number one character trait the quiz gave me, no matter how cynical of a view i have about those quizzes, was bravery, and i speculate that my love of challenge and adventure is the reason for this. i also think that part of choosing a harder path is being honest about yourself and your shortcomings. during week two, david brooks described the shortcomings of an “adam 1” mindset, as he coined it, stating that, “that (adam i) turns you into a shrewd animal where you realize there’s a difference between your desired self and your actual self (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks, ted moreau fye week 2).” now being hypersensitive about yourself and all of your inevitable failures is not healthy, but not actively trying to bridge the “difference between your desired self and your actual self” in your day to day life is paramount to avoiding challenge and escaping responsibility, and that view makes me somewhat different from brooks and others. in week 1 we talked about openness, and i questioned how much openness was beneficial if you are sharing things you would be comfortable to share anyways, versus being open about things you would not necessarily want to admit. dr. brown explained in her ted talk “they (her https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim patients) didn’t talk about vulnerability being comfortable, they just talked about it being necessary ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown, tedxhouston moreau fye week 1)”. perhaps being completely open about your lived experiences and feelings is what we should strive for, but it seems shallower and less eye-opening to me than when someone really opens up in a way that is genuine and courageous. this is an example of taking a more difficult route and reaping the benefits above and beyond those you could get if you chose an easier way. there have been enough times in my life where i have done the opposite and not reaped such rewards. 2. i believe that my life is better when you know the people around you even though it is not exactly meant to be applied to friendship, i want to start with fr.fragerberg’s window/ mirror dichotomy metaphor. most of us spend our time looking into a mirror, focused on ourselves and our own concerns, when as fragerberg notes, “normally, i should be able to see the real world around me, and the neighbor with whom i should be concerned ( “faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grottomoreau fye week 3).” my question was how to switch the mirror into a window. my solution was to find others who accept you and appreciate who you are. this means you will not have to focus on your appearance and actively code switch, therefore learning to be an unaltered version of yourself. this will free your attention towards others, returning the favor of their acceptance. this has already been happening to me at notre dame, and it was something i was sorely missing in high school. just that contrast in experience has shown me how important friendship is. since arriving here, i have introduced myself and conversed with every person possible, not realizing just how insightful in different ways those people are. it can be difficult to start these conversations, but that goes back to walking the road of more resistance. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau in my “where i’m from” poem, i noted or implied multiple relationships in my piece. i began with hockey, and the many friends i have made from my teammates, who always helped improve. next i wrote about the “two brothers i could never beat, (moreau fye week 6)” who i still look up to today, and then the incredible men i work with on the warehouse floor, most of them are from mexico and bosnia, who have learned english on their own and have taught me the craft so well. of course my teammates and coworkers do not compare to my own brothers, but all of these people have taught me so much that i never would have expected, and it is usually the ones who you do not expect who will say just what you need to hear. however, so many people would never listen and take the time to learn from people like my coworkers or the person who passes them on the street, because they have already made up their mind about them. we learned about the dangers of stereotyping from chimamanda ngozi adiche. adiche said “the problem with stereotypes is that they do not tell the whole story, not that they are necessarily wrong (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, tedmoreau fye week 7).” had i already made up my mind to decide that a 50 year-old bonsian forklift driver, or a classmate who may not seem like somebody i would get along with, i would never have had so many incredible experiences. 3. i believe that my religion still guides my moral compass i noted how vital friendships are to my enjoyment of life, and especially my personal growth, but it is really hard to build great relationships: friendly, romantic, or other. we saw a great example of what happens when relationships do not have a strong moral bedrock in the “because i love you” video. the narrator explains, “because i love you, you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected ("because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation moreau fye week 4).” this person thinks they should be the center of the others’ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g life, which is something that i try as hard as possible to avoid. they may have genuine love for the other person, but they have no humility, which i noted in my week 4 qqc. why was this the first thing that came to mind, especially when humility is often forgotten by many, myself included? this is because of my biblical worldview. i want to build my relationships in a way that jesus did, by putting others’ needs before my own, as he washed the disciples’ feet, despite the fact that he was quite literally the most important person to walk the earth. carla harris’s use of scripture in her speech was inspiring; so much so that it began to give me chills. relating to humility even quoted a passage from phillipians entitled christ’s example of humility. one more example of how christian faith drives how i, carla harris, and many others view the world around us. harris quotes matthew 6:33, and she explains that “this verse means to call upon his wisdom, and the more you ask for his help, then the more you will come to know his voice ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5).” people and stories like carla harris’s are a reason for why i believe that. her faith guided her to incredible heights. it can do the same for the rest of the world. i often wonder why this is still a core belief, but that is because when i make decisions based on faith, they seldom turn out poorly, no matter how many times i try other options first. it once more goes back to choosing a harder path. the moral, faith based decision is often difficult; more often than not i do not make that decision, but when i do then the effect it has on my day, week, and life is profound. https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 intergeration 2 moreau nicholas pietrosante moreau taylor kelly 12/2/2021 the final reboot i truly think my life as a whole has been a myriad of high expectations, set up by me truly that have hurt me far more than benefit me. nothing was ever good enough. i either got little utility from my biggest achievements or felt that i had not deserved what i had earned. when i started to get older my dad would always ask me what made me happy. after every accomplishment, i always got curious why i could never really enjoy it or only be able to enjoy it for a small amount of time. i played lacrosse my whole life but i never was content with how i played. parents would come up to me and my parents to always say how well i played. at tournaments, coaches and parents would ask me where i was committed. it didn’t matter. i was always worried about the next game or play. for my senior season of lacrosse, i thought if i won the state championship and started i would finally be happy with lacrosse. when those last seconds on the scoreboard were winding down and our fans were screaming their hearts out. i thought this was what it feels like to be happy with your sport. i then woke up the next morning and remembered i wasn’t playing lacrosse in college; this just started the vicious cycle again of not being content. it was the same for all of the high schools. every good grade i got only gave me about ten seconds of satisfaction. it was like this for years thinking if i keep doing well i can get into a good school and then i’d be satisfied. coming to school here i finally thought i could be joyful and content. i made it what else can i want after getting into my dream “school” (gateway); but of course i couldn't let myself be happy. specifically, with school, i never thought i deserved the grades i got or even the praise from my superiors. it always bugged me and then after week nine, i found there was a word for how i was feeling. (“what is imposter syndrome https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109498 ” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). the imposter syndrome video made me feel a lot better. knowing a lot of kids had similar problems. this common conundrum with highly accomplished students is a real problem that needs to be addressed. i feel like a lot of people have nagging voices in the back of our heads that tell us we are not good enough or don’t deserve certain things. the video even mentions kids getting validation from others for being high achieving and it does not even help them a little bit to feel better. the only thing that can help people with this issue is knowing they aren’t alone. during my time at notre dame, the main problems i have encountered are difficult academic standards to transfer in and a limited spot in the business school. i have always expected a certain level of academic excellence so it wasn’t hard for me to adapt. the more i have learned about imposter syndrome it has taught me that even though you are at a college campus with thousands of kids you can feel so alone. the feeling you aren’t equal makes you think you are the one odd egg. the community almost makes you think that you have been rejected. having these thoughts everyday can be tiring and it’s just not worth it to waste energy thinking about it so; i have responded by just trying to enjoy my time here more and worry and let a grade on screen control my happiness. hopefully this can truly be my model for my time here and soak up everything this amazing place has to offer. these constant feelings of me not feeling worthy and being content turned out to . this was only the beginning of my challenges in life. as college went on i felt the gateway program made me feel i didn’t deserve to go to nd as the isolation progressed throughout the semester. i think the central challenges of my community are the division of gateways from the nd community. the general consensus i have heard about notre dame my whole life was how special the community was. i got the idea nailed into my brain that at notre dame you weren’t just a number on a piece number but known as an individual and loved. what i believed was that all people at nd were very welcoming and truly nice. those assumptions are what guided my decision into choosing the gateway program. i didn’t know how severe the division was until i got here. i know it is such a minuscule thing but really it affects the community of gateway students. finding out we weren’t getting housing, our moreau classes only being other gateways, we were not allowed to sign up for classes till a week later as notre dame students. it just screams discrimation telling us we are inferior. all of these challenges as a whole have affected gateways. it has made the gateways feel excluded from a community most of us we have coveted to join for so long. the gateways aren’t some bottom tier students either, a lot of us have excelled and could have gone to other great institutions. i feel that just a lot of stuff hasn’t gone the right way for us. as a student who has set up high expectations for his whole life this just adds to my feeling of being an imposter. having to go to a different college to attain the same degree as other students. it all just screams being excluded from the school and giving us students a feeling of not being worthy. kids who besides the fact have similar states it just is a little annoying. taking away from the joy i thought i would have coming to this amazing school that i have dreamed of coming to my whole life. a community should be a united system where everyone feels like they belong and are loved. where everyone is going through similar stuff. even though it is hard sometimes the holy cross community and the gateways all lean on each other to make a community. these are the past types of communities because our division from nd has brought us closer as a whole group making our time here easier. in (“ women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten) it illustrates the whole idea that in life not everything is going to go your way. that the world will be coming crashing down on you. kintsugi symbolizes that no matter what happens it is never the end. anything can be healed with time and perseverance. this video really helped me as all these issues arised i found https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109511 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109511 out i need to roll with the punches. i need to only worry about what i can control and be content that i am trying my hardest. now all i can do is just have faith that in time all the pieces will fall back together. all my life i have never really been excluded but now doing the gateway program i can comprehend it a little better. this feeling of exclusion or being the odd one out for something i can’t control truly drives me crazy. going through this experience i think i have a fuzzy idea now of how terrible discrimation can truly be. i did not realize how difficult a person of color truly had it. all my life i have gone to school and played sports where i was the majority. never thinking how the one or two kids of color felt surrounded by white kids. i truly took it for granted and can’t even begin to think how difficult that would be for someone. the only discrimation i feel like i have ever felt which is not even close to being on the same level is being a gateway so, i can only imagine how hard day to day life can be for minorities. in (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven) finding out how apparent racism is in day to day life is mind boggling. i think one of the biggest problems in today’s society is most people don’t even know they are racist. no one is born racist but, due to stereotypes and negative stimuli towards minorities people subconsciously have racist thoughts. i really do think the problem with this issue is that whenever one minority messes up it gets published around the globe. there are plenty of white people who kill people and do drugs but it somehow never makes the news. this is how i come to my conclusion that the system sometimes is systematically racist and must be changed. life sometimes is not fair and we have to play the hands we are dealt. i hate to say it but racism is a very present thing in the world we live in. hopefully as a community in this world we can identify this problem and truly look towards god to help heal us. through god anything is possible so just maybe we can break the pattern. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109528 in my life, i have encountered a miscellaneous amount of problems. from breaking my back as a sophomore in high school, to a severe eczema condition, to losing my grandma my first year of college. through all of my lows in life, one thing i can say is true. the lowest times in my life are the times i have become closer to god. all of my life i constantly set high expectations with my sports, school, and success. i would always ask god just this once to help me get a good grade or play well in a game. as my faith progressed i started to realize how wrong this is. in (“ the screwtape letters chapter 8 ” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve) lewis highlights that the demons were confused on how god gets the permit possession of our souls. god's closest followers most of the time aren’t praising him when they are thriving or on the contrary, when people are barely hanging they call out to god for his help. now looking back at maybe the reason i wasn’t satisfied with my accomplishments in high school was god was not present enough. maybe all those years of not being content could be fixed with a little prayer. i truly think this a problem in today's society that we don’t celebrate god when we are well, only we need him. in my life i have encountered lows and highs and i now realize no matter the outcome i should always reach out to god. either for praise or for help god should be in our lives all the time and not only when we need him. hope in the midst of brokenness can be the difference from totally utter failure and success. god’s light can shine a light on the right path even in the darkest of days. this is how god truly builds his community. god always being there for his children and loving them unconditionally no matter what is what makes our faith so strong. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/modules/items/109545 integration 2 overcoming obstacles prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? this semester at notre dame has been full of challenges and obstacles that have brought blood, sweat and tears. it feels like i have been through the thick and the thin and have had to deal with many different challenges. from academics to athletics to relationships and weather, it has all contributed to my overall experience whether good or bad. i have learned how to be strong, how to push through, how to let things out and suffer, but also how to get back up and brush it off. one of the most important things i have learned is the ability to move on and come back stronger with a mindset that doesn’t dwell on the past, but pushes to the future and finds hope in what is to come. i have had to find what works for me in times of distress to be able to carry this mindset through to the next day. each day i find another opportunity to do my best and to be grateful for what i have and where i am. as i continue to be at notre dame, i increasingly feel blessed to be there and blessed with the opportunity to go to this school and be surrounded by this amazing community. my drive to keep going is to become the best version of myself. obstacles are hard to ignore, so in many cases, dissonance is inevitable. for me, there are so many expectations in my life that i either try to meet or strive to meet. this can be healthy, but also unhealthy in a sense where i may be disappointed if my goals are too high and too hard to reach. as said by julia hogan in why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit in moreau fye week 9, “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others.” when people place expectations on themselves that are binding to their happiness and success, it limits their mind to think that they are only good enough if they meet these expectations. there are no real expectations that should or should not be set for each person because each person is their own and shouldn’t focus on such little things that are so arbitrary. in the end, if you are constantly focusing on these little things, it is much easier to get disappointed in yourself when you don’t meet them, which just doesn’t help keep the journey fulfilling and rewarding. instead, it puts more pressure on every step and puts pressure on the individual every step of the way. the best things to focus on are doing your best and doing what you can in that moment. yes, people may make mistakes, but that is all about life and how we learn. as an athlete, i struggle with this constantly throughout my life. constantly, i am setting expectations for myself that i would love to achieve, but sometimes they are not realistic and cause me to feel discouraged if not completed. what i constantly must look back on and consider is all of the factors that went into it and why i got to where i did or didn’t. this can help me understand what to do and what to work on next time so that i can reach my goals in the end. often anyway, i set high standards for myself because i expect a lot of myself. i am a student at the university of notre dame and feel like i must live up to that and demonstrate it to the best of my ability. striving for excellence can https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau be a good thing and a bad thing, but i've found that balance in these two is the best way to succeed. being able to be okay with the fact that something didn’t turn out right, learning from it, and accepting that i make mistakes is healthy for the mind to recover and to help take the pressure off. focusing more on the aspect of effort and trying my best has always been helpful in pushing me forward and focusing on the little successes. i have also been able to learn the fact that obstacles are there for a reason. they are not there to solely break us down and to kill us. they are there to break us down, but what many people fail to realize is that when we are broken down, it forces us to be vulnerable and realize what things we need to work on. some people could take this as negativity and refuse to believe they have flaws, while others can use it as feedback and learn from it. they can strive to be better next time and learn what will make their next hard encounter a little bit better. this quote is very powerful in helping people realize the realities in life of hardships, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop,” kirsten helgeson, moreau fye week 10) teaching people this type of mindset helps everyone feel comfort in the fact that they are not alone. when allowing women to break pieces of pottery and put them back together with gold, it helps symbolize that we are breakable and can be broken, but can be put back together even prettier than we started. we can all be broken, but can come back stronger and better than before. all of these things that break us down are there to help us get stronger and to learn and grow from those experiences. all of the things that people experience in life, the good and the bad, shape them into the beautiful and well-rounded person they have become. our society has many challenges and obstacles that are constantly in the way of our successes and goals. in my life specifically, there have been many obstacles along the way especially in my sport. i have been through two tough injuries in which i was unable to train or run. instead of sitting on the couch doing nothing, i proactively did my exercises, and started back cross-training when i could. i was in the pool everyday until i could slowly transition into running again and eventually came back to win a state championship. although learning of the injuries were devastating at the time, they caused me to focus on myself and love the person i am outside of running. they helped me realize how much i love running and helped me learn that sometimes my body needs a break and can’t take constant training. i learned to listen to my body more and to take its cues when it ultimately knows me the best. in addition, i have had academic challenges and obstacles. going through covid and experiencing online learning was difficult because many of our teachers actually taught the content of the course. instead i had to find it within myself to learn it on my own and to study hard to be able to get a good grade. at times i got bad grades or did badly, but then it helped me realize what i needed to work on and do better next time. in the end, i eventually was able to learn myself and learn what i needed in order to be successful, and ended up thriving. obstacles are difficult, but they are worth it in the end to shape the person you are and the things you learn. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau one of the most helpful things at notre dame especially is the community. when others around you are struggling and you are too, it is important to know that you are not alone. the people surrounding you are there to help you. it may not seem like it, but they are there to lend a hand and are willing to help you. in addition, you can be there for them if they need help. you can rely on each other and pick one another up when everything may seem impossible. bonds and friendships and relationships are extremely powerful in helping people see the positive side of things. from parker j palmer in “thirteen ways of looking at a community,” (moreau fye week 11) “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” this quote overarches the idea that community is not something that should be readily worked for and searched for, but rather as something that develops from within each person that is able to be shared when everyone is together. community should be thought of as a gift to each of us, not as something that we must manifest to make happen. if individuals must strive to work for the community, it is not natural and we will often find ourselves trying to make something that we simply can not. in order to achieve effective community, we must relax into the natural things that bring us together as people with common interests within one another. ever since coming to notre dame, i have felt a huge sense of community that i think is so unique to this campus and school. everyone around me is incredibly friendly and willing to help one another and put each other up. where i grew up, many of the people around me were fake and didn’t genuinely care about anyone else but themselves. they always had to be better than the people around them which led to constant conflicts and head-butting until someone was the victor. i love that everyone around me at notre dame are real people. they have discipline, goals, desires, and are driven. even through conflict, the people around me here are willing to lend a hand and guide me to success. people want me to succeed here which is an amazing family to be a part of. there is no wasted energy on being negative to people or not being kind which makes this place one of a kind in my eyes. being here has helped me realize that i can continue to foster this energy and pass it along to others. it is a powerful way to develop community and great bonds with one another and empowers positive attitudes and mindsets. keeping hope is one of the most important things i have done to survive obstacles in my life. it may be difficult at times, but that is why it is so special and important. the power of hope can overcome almost anything. in “the screwtape letters,” by c.s. lewis chapter 8 (moreau fye week 12), the author writes, “he wants them to learn to walk and therefore takes away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there, he is pleased even with their stumbles.” this quote demonstrates that in order for individuals to grow and progress on their own, they must learn on their own. they must be put out into the real world by themselves with no handicaps or someone to hold their hand, and experience life alone. this helps them develop on their own and explore the world around them individually and learn things on their own. it teaches them that there are ups and downs in life and that life is difficult. they are able to experience hardships and obstacles, but overcome them and learn from them. if they are constantly holding someone’s http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://iansuffix.kontek.net/docs/screwtapechpt8.htm hand, they often won’t be able to experience the reality of the world around them, which is difficult. many things in life i had to learn the hard way. when my parents and coaches had to stop holding my hand all the time, i experienced the world as it truly is and learned the values of the ups and downs of life. college is especially a big step for many students in the world because it is one of the longest times many of them have been away from home and their families and support system. being immersed in this new environment helps each of us grow on our own and experience how to live on our own and develop new habits and ways of living that make us more independent and productive towards what we want. with this new transition, i was able to see the world differently and learn to manage my time on my own around my priorities. i had to go through hard times of being stressed and not being able to organize my time well with what i had going on, which taught me what to do next time, and helped me see what i really needed to do in order to make my life run smoothly on my own. having confidence in myself and the things i can do on my own, help me grow and live in hope that i can get through hard things and work my way around difficult situations. there is a future outside of the world we currently live in that will lead to bigger things and opportunities. having hope is worth it because it allows us to get there and know that there is more to come. we can have hope that the sun will rise the next day in order to help us keep going and see that things will get better and we will find light. throughout my life, i have been through a lot, but the ability to have hope, overcome obstacles, see them as a learning experience, keep an open mind, and move on, have helped me see through to the other side. there have been many difficulties or times i have wanted to quit, but the little drive inside of me with the support around me has helped keep me afloat. i have learned the importance of community and the power of shared experiences. i have also learned how to learn from my mistakes and know that they are okay and inevitable. these experiences have helped me grow and become a better person in times of despair and adversity which help me to keep moving forward. moreau fye mike integration 2 12/3/21 developing a broad(y)er understanding of life the first couple months of my college career consisted of a few, simple things: excitement, failure, and disappointment. this is quite evident in the rocky, decreasing line that i drew from august through october on my “high-low” chart (moreau fye week twelve). after i managed to get my feet under myself, i have had the opportunity to explore both the benefits of excitement, and the benefits of disappointment. specifically, i have questioned my current path, accepted the absurdity of perfection, and developed a balanced group of friends and future roommates. overall, i have taken my experiences from the first half of the term--the good ones and the bad ones--and reviewed them so that i may continue on a path that is best suited for my beliefs and desires. in high school i rarely engaged with the school community beyond those who could help boost my “adam one” side. in short, i “only tried to build on [my] strengths” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). coming to college, however, i promised myself that i would begin to focus on things other than my resume. while it is a little more difficult, it is much more satisfying. when i tested this method out by doing absolutely no homework on the first gameday, i felt like a different brody...i felt like an imposter. i was at one of the top colleges in the world, and i was spending my first free weekend tailgating and partying from 10 am until 10 pm. the day after, i looked back and felt like i “hadn’t really earned [my] accomplishments” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). although it felt weird, i kept forcing myself to engage in events around campus: section football, interhall cross country, s’mores with flaherty, bp syr, and more! i finally reached a point where i feel comfortable doing something other than working toward an end goal 24/7, while also maintaining that inner drive to become a dedicated, compassionate doctor. this “new” brody lifestyle proved to be quite beneficial. in my week nine reflection, i mentioned how i related to the feeling of a “lonely college student” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine)...yeah...it took about three weeks for that to change. to be fair, at that point i was in the midst of the “october dip” that was a common low on many individuals’ graphs during week twelve. fast forward to about a week ago: i was sitting in my dorm room with three of my good friends talking about how we need to secure the “meat locker” for next year, a four-man room with a lounge area that not many people know about. looking back, it was these guys that i had fantastic experiences with at football games, in the dining hall, in sub, and in duncan’s two-four, all within the last two months. my mindset about notre dame and its prestige completely changed. it was quite an amazing feeling to realize that i could balance work and play...that i could “play like a champion today,” both in academics and in friendships. for the future, i am confident in my ability to achieve a perfect (at most times) balance between having fun with friends, and working hard in school. while this balance between work and play has become clearer to me, other things have not. i am still unclear as to why i constantly feel like a nerd that is regularly being beat up by a bully whose name is “chemistry 10181.” i put more effort into this class than any class i have before by a longshot. this hard work, however, is never displayed in my exam scores. this course is the only task that i have faced wherein genuine, hard work barely contributes to one’s success. i explained my situation to my dad, and all he said was: “i gave you hard-working genes, but not the super, crazy, smart genes like those doing well in the class have...but i think you are smart enough to know you need out of that class because an average of a 60 on an exam is simply absurd!” throughout my struggles with this class--which got worse as time went on--guys from my dorm continued to demonstrate their understanding. one sophomore who, like my future self, dropped biochemistry asap, went out of his way to put me in touch with one of his friends who was currently a chemistry tutor for the learning resources center. i have gone to meet with him in coleman morse every tuesday for two hours since that initial meeting. the individual in my dorm comforted me, and pushed me to be better. “i need people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau week eleven). although i am still struggling, this kind deed made me feel as though i was not the only one in my boat. previously it had felt like i was a member of a one-man crew. this sense of community struggle gave me comfort that i had not experienced before. from these struggles, followed by this warm embrace, i have grown to accept what happens in life for what it is: failure happens, and i need to accept that i am far from perfect, and so failure will inevitably come. like father john jenkins said, regardless of “the many demands of [chemistry 10181] pushing [me] in other directions,” i have to “push back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). having had this experience, i am now fully aware of the close, resourceful community around me that loves one another for who they are--failures and all. on the topic of community, i have come to a revelation that people at notre dame genuinely want the best for you. specifically, i have also answered a major question i had coming into college. my high school was a very prestigious, competitive school. kids would ask you “what did you get” on nearly every assignment you ever took, ranging from a spanish coloring sheet to the sat. i absolutely despised people when they asked this question. at notre dame, however, i have rarely experienced that. one would think at such a highly-regarded institution, everyone would try to beat everyone else. while that may be true in interhall football, it is often not the case in the classroom. before coming to notre dame, i knew that everyone sought success; i did not know, however, that everyone wanted to see their peers succeed to the same extent. i had a recent experience that truly exemplified this notion of community support. about one week before spring term class registration, i received an email from a sophomore in my dorm. “underclassmen scheduling extravaganza monday in 2-4” read the email. he had gathered together a band of upperclassmen from various majors to help freshmen pick the most interesting classes, best teachers, and preferred time slots. i sat down with an upperclassman who was also pre-med and he gave me “the lowdown” for the next year and a half of my academic career. these upperclassmen spent over an hour of their time helping random freshmen pick out their classes. i doubt many of my friends at other colleges have this opportunity. this “extravaganza” furthered my understanding of what the term “notre dame family” truly means. i will keep this in mind for the rest of my notre dame career, helping out the incoming freshman in the different ways that i can. i also hope to keep this example in mind throughout my future plans as i move on with my life, not forgetting to help those entering into a new journey behind me. none of these revelations over the past couple months came to me through intense search. rather, they came to me through natural experience, along with a sense of hope. in fact, i am still searching for a lot of answers. these blank spots in my future do scare me. however, it is my newly discovered sense of hope that “make[s me] stronger and prepare[s me] for harder challenges in the future” (“hope-holy cross and cristian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). it was not until about a month ago that i could say i am confident with where i am in my college life. ultimately, throughout the second half of the semester, i have grown to accept failure side by side with those around me. and when i do fail in the future--and i will--i can always remember: “a setback is a setup for a comeback” (willie jolley). huller 1 theo helm moreau fye 3 december 2021 forming community amid conflict notre dame is comprised of a diverse group of students, each with their own personal experiences and backgrounds. these experiences strongly influence the way everyone sees the world; therefore, on the surface, notre dame is a harmonious, unified group of students, yet each individual person sees notre dame and its community in a different way. each of us has the ability to see issues or flaws within the community that another would not initially be able to point out. coming to a place where everyone has different backgrounds, i have been able to engage in discussion and advance perspectives that i had never previously considered. our discussion in week ten most closely relates to this idea. it is so imperative that we don’t close ourselves off from absorbing and listening to other’s experiences. by listening to other members of the community, especially those we don’t agree with, we prevent polarization and stagnation; “if we can solve the problem of hatred, we have a chance to come together and solve all the others” (wesley theological summary 2012 commencement address by father jenkins moreau fye week 10). improvement and betterment of a community can only be achieved through the willingness to understand other perspectives; in order to form a community, we “must embrace even those we perceive as the ‘enemy’” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmer – moreau fye week 11). this section goes on to further discuss that “community is the place where the person you least want to live with always lives” (thirteen https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ huller 2 ways of looking at community by parker palmer – moreau fye week 11). living in community with someone by no means requires that there is no conflict; however, it does indicate that conflict should be engaged in through productive discussion and used to better the community as a whole. looking more specifically at the notre dame community, there was a very recent example of this type or moral conflict and hatred on our own campus. the rover article published last month resulted in a huge emotional reaction in our community, and rightfully so. as much as i myself disagreed with the moral alignment and arguments presented in that article, i am still forced to remind myself that all of us represent the same notre dame community. as stated in the commencement address from week 10, “to avail itself of the most effective disguise, hatred often hides in self-righteous conviction” (wesley theological summary 2012 commencement address by father jenkins – moreau fye week 10). while i and many of my fellow students are deeply disturbed by the material published in the rover, we must be able to use that publication as an opportunity to respond with an outpouring of love and support for our friends that identify with the lgbtq+ community. further, we must use it as an opportunity to identify grave flaws in our culture and work to address those underlying issues in a way that does not confront people with hatred. notre dame is situated in a unique position in that it provides highly rigorous academics while at the same time providing a transformation of the heart and mind to its students based upon catholic teachings. with this exceptional combination of higher education and religion also comes conflict between the two, especially considering notre dame is not comprised exclusively of catholic students. the community here often comes under much religious criticism, as seen in the overwhelming student response to the rover article. by virtue of these conflicts, it is http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ huller 3 extremely important that we respond in love rather than hate. the uniqueness of the integration between religion and education in the notre dame community makes our university extremely special, as religion and education are so intertwined in our campus and community. a notre dame education, “... requires a particular type of dying to self. whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place” (holy cross and christian education by campus ministry at the university of notre dame – moreau fye week 12). the irony in this is that religion is the facet that encourages love and acceptance in community while at the same time it is often the source of division in that same community. more specifically, we face a divide over what the catholic church deems as acceptable, how social teachings have modernized, and if we even need to consider these social teachings at all in the campus community. the religious aspect of notre dame is both a divisive instrument and unifying factor in the notre dame community. we are religiously divided among topics like the rover article, parietals, and gender relations in general; however, religion serves to unify us through the transformation of our hearts and minds, and the overwhelming sense of community present on campus and even throughout the alumni network. overall, we as students have to remember that, even in the face of conflict, we are all part of the same notre dame community and a lot of us even share the same struggles. for instance, in the week nine moreau discussion we talked about imposter syndrome. all of us here are exceptionally high achieving individuals, yet most of us still struggle with imposter syndrome (advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmann – moreau week 9). sometimes, simply reminding ourselves that we all face the same internal struggles can make the conflicts we encounter from living in community much easier to face. instead of treating a person as an opinion, we need to treat them as a sum of all their parts: mind, heart body, and https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html huller 4 spirit. reducing someone to only view them as their opinions is detrimental the concept of community, regardless of how much we disagree with someone. instead, we need to engage in fruitful, productive discussion in efforts to solve one issue at a time. the realization of our commonalities along with our own unique perspectives and backgrounds will enable us to communicate effectively and mesh to form a more perfect community at notre dame. moreau first year experienceblank paper blank paper “being open-minded means accepting all perspectives as possibilities. however, it does not imply that one necessarily believes in all perspectives. one can choose one’s own beliefs while still maintaining an open mind, as long as he/she is willing to accept that others’ beliefs are equally as legitimate”, by ryan gottfredson. i have always kept an open mind every time i step foot in my moreau class, every time i read a book, every time i go meet someone new. i am always interested in learning the other side, and i don’t ever keep myself trapped in a bubble where the only thoughts guiding me are from myself. i am glad i experienced this class because i do feel like i have integrated many different things. as time progressed, i strongly feel like i have grown throughout every minute. deep self-knowledge relates critically to my personal development and entry into a new chapter of my life. learning about encountering dissonance, learning about encountering brokenness, learning about encountering community, and learning about encountering hope have developed my character and strengthened my faith. there are many things i have encountered throughout this semester, but these are the following that strikes me the most: faith, community, and open challenges internally/externally. the way i will respond to each is by always following my first step: having an open mind. i have encountered the community since day one that i have gotten here at notre dame. however, i can confidently say that i view my community differently since the first day that i just began experiencing it. community is one of those things that have grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far. there are many definitions of the word community, but there is one that captures my attention as it is something that i see unfold every time i step foot out of my residence hall: “a social group who follow a social structure within a society (culture, norms, values, status). they may work together to organize social life within a particular space, or they may be bound by a sense of belonging sustained across time and space.” i do feel connected with the community at notre dame because i feel like even though we come from different backgrounds, we are all here for the same purpose. there is social life here because we create it, and it brings us together even more. “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). there are so many truths to this statement. this is what inspired me on how i should approach the community. i have learned to be relaxed and just receive the gift, rather than make anything feel forced and make it seem like i am still designing the perfect blueprint. receptivity does involve inner work and it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness. faith has been something i have been developing over time even before i got here at notre dame. however, this class has made me reflect on my level of faith as of recent times. i strongly feel like this community has made me feel more connected to god and made me approach my faith in different ways. it’s one of those things that first began as a bit ambiguous and vague but now has become much more clear. this class and my overall experience have blank paper made me strongly believe in this statement: “faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” i have taken the time to show my belief in god and i am much more faithful than before. “competence can be acquired externally in many different ways, but courage is instilled over time by cultivating one’s heart and constantly directing its purposes beyond one’s self “(“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). cultivating one 's heart and constantly directing its purposes beyond one's self is, indeed, a required process to discover the truth of who we are as human creatures, with social obligations, find love and feel empowered to become something better, and be more like the person of jesus. cultivating the heart will develop in virtue. we can absorb a boundless amount of knowledge and information, but if we fail to see ourselves as people with a vocation to open our hearts to christ, then we most certainly cannot live a life in hope. we need to take the time to surround ourselves with deep spirituality to prosper in one thing: heart. lastly, i have encountered open challenges internally and externally throughout this semester. both from the start because i felt a strong sense of isolation. however, this was the causation of myself and my thoughts heading into college. dissonance was a part of it because it was like two people talking at the same time. a clash of two disharmonious or unsuitable elements. ”understand that your loneliness is not failure and that you are far from being alone in this feeling. open your mind and take experiences as they come. you’re going to find your people”(“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). specifically, regarding internal dissonance, the best way to combat this is to lower your expectations. we blame ourselves so badly to the point where we feel like our life is meaningless. we need to stop that. we don't always need to hit those marks. having a healthy, substantial life is good enough in my book. being open-minded about everything going on is a better habit. “a zeal for different opinions concerning religion, concerning government, and many other points … have … divided mankind into parties inflamed them with mutual animosity, and rendered them much more disposed to vex and oppress each other than to cooperate for their common good” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by john jenkins moreau fye week ten). i always felt like i wasn’t going to be able to connect with people due to different views, however, this is far from the truth. we are all different no matter what, we just need to acknowledge our differences and embrace them rather than separate them. keeping an open mind about others at this point is key to making a difference and has helped me with getting through my feeling of isolation. in everything that i have encountered, i have always kept an open mind as it is the best form of response i can give. intergration assignment 1irons the iron law by jacob irons root belief #1: i believe that all people are unique and should never be judged for being different. i have always been seen as the weird kid that announces. when i would travel to other schools and broadcast, i would come in with a suit, and everyone would stop and stare at me. i would always get weird looks or be made fun of as i walked by with my briefcase. i began to get to a point where i felt shame for being the kid who wanted to be the broadcast. dr. brown elaborates in her ted talk, “ is there something about me that, if others... see it, that i won’t be worthy of connection?” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i got to a point where i felt immense shame for being the kid who broadcasted. i would always avoid the student section since i never wanted to be seen as the broadcast kid. i was fearful that if it got to a point where it just defined me. i wanted to make sure this never stopped me from creating a connection with someone, as dr. brown said. it took me until my senior year of high school to fully understand this belief due to the thanks of my high school principal. i intentionally walked around a student section while he just walked straight by. he asked me why i did that, and i explained that i was getting picked on. he began to tell me that no one should ever be judged or stereotyped for who they were. in week seven we were asked to watch a video from mrs. ngozi adichie ted talk that resembled much like the speech my principal gave me. “the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). everyone has the things that make them who they are and should never be ashamed. they are creating this stereotype of yourself when this is not the full stroy. he followed with remember you are an all-confrence athlete, class president and so much more. he said never lose sight of this when someone is making fun of your one little thing. in a high school gym, it took me to this very moment to realize everyone is unique and should never be judged for being different. if it were never for my high school principal, i would never have been able to live this belief fully. it goes back to david’s brooks point, “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). although i would like to say i came to this belief on my own and it was solely my idea, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim this is not the case. the help of my high school principal allowed me to find this root belief and truly live it out. root belief #2: i believe that i am searching for lifelong relationships. everyone is looking for life-giving friendships. this was one of the most heavily talked about, i felt, in my group. this belief has been with me since the day i was introduced to schooling. i have always been a social child and want to become best friends with everyone. sadly as i grew up, i learned this is not the case. due in fact that, “i am from a town with more children than adults” (“where i call my hometown” by jacob irons moreau fye week six). i have lived in a town where for the past two censuses where the number of children out numbered the amount of people over the age of 18. making the task of becoming everyone’s friend a hard reality. so once relaying this task would be challenging, i made the change to ensure that if i were going to be someone’s friend, it would be meaningful. from that moment i started looking for truly lifelong relationships. however, this belief became challenged after i met my ex-girlfriend. she was a transfer student and was genuinely interested in my sports broadcasting. it had started to become where i felt i had really made a life-long connection. although, this was not the case sadly. after breaking up i relaized she was just using me to get into games and all the perks of working in the athletic department. it goes back to what we talked about in week four, “they use you to get what they want. nothing feels worse than being used in any relationship” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic freinship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week 4). this is exactly how i felt after this connection was ultimately abused by my counterpart. i wanted to rush by this moment and pretend that i was not used for my access. i ran away from facing this fear and reality that i had been abused. however, i turned to one of the only true consistents in my life which was faith. attempting to try and make the healing process better i just continued to look for god and it really never came until i finally sat down and realized what had happened. father pete in the week three video i think hit the nail on the head, “be patient. when you are in a hurry faith becomes so much harder to understand” (the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3). once i had taken the time and really hit the breaks i began to understand that i should not be discouraged from this goal due to one bad egg. this is why today you can see me having a conversation with basically anyone whom is willing to have one. https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1u63hydviiulrblfjsxhtgbdob3xkmm-g2-h39qwvo1m/edit https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry root belife #3: i believe that failure shapes me into the person i am today. this belief is one that i never realied until i got here to the campus of the university of notre dame. in high school i flew by every task and assignment. i was smart, i tried and was naturally gifted throughout my early years of education. attending here is a dream to say the least; however, i felt like i would just jump right into naturally gilding through academics and extracurriculars. i was given a rude awakwening after my first exam. it was my science elective thinking that how much harder or challenging could this be then what i saw in high school. i will never do this again. i ultimately due to the lack of study and preparing got a 69. once opening gradebook i fell paralized. i had just gotten this worst grade in my entire life on a test on my first college exam. i panicked and felt like a complete idiot and felt that maybe i did not belong here after all. panicking call my parents said well let’s never do this again and make sure that you take this and use it as a learning experience. to the words of carala harris, “failure always brings you a gift” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). i was left wondering what in the world the gift i could get from this immense failure. then i realized that the gift was understanding failure. i had never truly been hit with failure before. i grew from this moment understanding that failure is not a bad experience but rather a learning experience. i have channeled since getting here turning them into a gift for myself and to learn from. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 week 8-integration three peter o’connor moreau fye mr. retartha 4 march, 2022 the well lived life of peter o’connor on march 1st, 2093 peter fell o’connor passed away from this earth at the age of 93. he is survived by his wife that he met at the university of notre dame, their three children, and his 15 grandchildren. peter attended the university of notre dame from 2021 until 2025 and received a bachelors in business administration from the mendoza college of business. after he graduated college he moved to new york city where he got a job in finance. peter grew up in the digital age where society shifted all of their focus online. “the amount of data humanity will collect while you’re reading the art of stillness is five times greater than the amount that exists in the entire library of congress.”(why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). during this era technology rapidly expanded from small “flip-phone” style communication devices to the advanced interconnected communications network we have today. he was alive for the creation of virtual reality and the first electronic vehicles. his experience with new technology was influential in his development as a person and as a student. the access to unlimited information and perspective made him a citizen of the world. one of the most important chapters of his life was his time at the university of notre dame. his college experience began as a gateway student spending his first year at both holy cross college and notre dame. he met lifelong friends at the school and enjoyed many different experiences. some highlights of his time there include his involvement with sibc, ndic, new https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ jersey club, and of course watching notre dame win three straight national championships in football. he was always proud of his university's impact on the world and especially the legacy of fr. ted hesburgh. “father hesburgh was one of the giants of the civil rights movement”(“hesburgh” by correta scott king moreau fye week two). fr. ted’s legacy continues to be an essential part of the university and something that peter tried to emulate in his life. the phrase “god, country, notre dame” is so important to peter that he had a plaque of it on his desk for every day of his working career. notre dame is a place peter forever loved which inspired his three children and so far seven of his grandchildren to attend. peter always tried to live a happy life in everything he did. joy was something that was important to him and it came in many different ways throughout his life. “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) one thing that was always constant was the joy he got from the jersey shore. his desire to improve his community in all aspects is something that made him want to continue to live. he ran for school board in his hometown of rumson and served as a school board member and eventually president for 20 years. in that time he vastly improved rumson schools, especially his alma mater rumson-fair haven regional high school. peter always found joy in his community whether it be his work, school, home, or family. peter’s career was something that was very important to him. working in finance was a goal of his since the beginning of high school and he was very proud to have realized that goal after graduating college. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo center for career development moreau fye week four). peter planned out what was necessary to advance his career in a very methodical way. he https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ worked hard on what was required of him but still left time to work on what he cared about. meeting people and making connections was something peter did to be genuine and make new friends not to add names to a network for linkedin. career planning is not an easy job but it was a job peter knew he needed to do. people who knew peter described him as funny, creative, energetic, and genuine. when people talked he listened to them and when peter talked people listened. from the beginning of his college experience his friends knew that peter valued success not only in himself but in those around him. (moreau fye week five). he would do whatever was necessary to help a friend reach their full potential. helping others was something he enjoyed and something he wanted to do. self-reflection was an incredibly important aspect of peter’s life especially in prayer. “this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.”(“the right way to be introspective( yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). peter practiced self reflection at least once a week in church. going to weekly mass was an important part of peter’s catholic identity that affected his daily life. being a catholic was a tradition that he received from his parents and grandparents and passed down to his children and grandchildren. during weekly mass peter would use the opportunity to reflect on his past week and pray for those that were important to him and what was going on in the world around him. happiness was important to peter as it is to every human being. some things that brought peter happiness but are not limited to the new england patriots, the notre dame fighting irish, the boston red sox, tottenham hotspur fc, the boston bruins, his children, his grandchildren, the jersey shore, the winter, and twitter. but happiness is more than a single thing. “happiness https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). peter always tried to find happiness in the whole and as friends of his we can say that he was successful. peter o’connor lived a life well-lived and we were blessed to know him. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration 1 integration one moreau first year experience october 15, 2021 healing my mind in south bend i believe that i value and care for my mental health. i came to notre dame eager to improve my mental health and coping mechanisms for stress after a tough 18 months in quarantine. reflecting back i realized i struggled so much because i chose to numb my emotions, but as dr. brene brown noted in moreau fye week 1, “you cannot selectively numb emotion” (the power of vulnerability”). by numbing my unhappy emotions, i was also numbing my positive emotions and found myself in a cycle of looking for happiness to feel better, failing to find long term happiness and feeling more alone than ever. after this realization i did a lot of self-reflection and transitioning back into normal life has reaffirmed many of the conclusions and values i found. in the following paragraphs, i will detail how these changes gave me a focus on forming healthier friendships and finding happiness in everyday occurrences. a big factor in my success was also taking more time for reflection and focusing on vulnerability as a way to provide myself with more accurate ideas around my emotions and reaffirm my improvements. i believe that i am choosing to be vulnerable with my friends. choosing to be honest about my mental health with my friends helped me find much of the joy, excitement and clarity i had lost during the pandemic. it can be hard to open up when struggling, but honesty helped force me to confront my emotions instead of numbing them. i found myself hiding certain struggles or experiences from others for fear of judgment. i now see the red flags within this thinking that show how unhealthy some of my high school friendships were. changes to friendships can creep in slowly and this realization helped me see that anyone who is “affecting your life more negatively than positively” is unhealthy (5 signs you are in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylormfye week 4). here at notre dame i have used this experience to focus on how i could better examine my own friendships and other relationships because awareness can help me protect myself and my friends. my experience has made me excited for what’s to come as i keep finding more people to make relationships with and helped me value strong friendships even more. i have also used my different strengths and personality quirks as a way to slowly show vulnerability. i began by sharing my sometimes controversial love for all things country music as a way to spark conversation. in sharing that, “i am from a 6,942 song music library that is strictly itunes purchases with van morrison, jimmy buffet, “uplifting,” “toes,” “endless surrender”” i discovered my friends anna and olivia loved zac brown band too (i am from by mfye week 6). additionally, i have embraced humor, both as a way to make myself happy and show vulnerability to connect with others. in accordance with the character survey by via in mfye week 2 i love to “[bring] smiles to other people, [see] the light side” and laugh. i often joke that i find myself hilarious, but humor is a trait i choose to hide in most settings. i tend to view humor as a negative which will diminish others’ opinion of me, and i feel very vulnerable when making jokes even though they bring me a lot of joy. but reflection around relationships and vulnerability forced me to rethink my judgments about humor. i have started making more jokes and sending silly selfies or talking about little random things which excite me that others might find funny. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/181qygdwc5o3mxbsv5c1vsckoewq6vzbapxpmwd4a81a/edit https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/surveys/finished/20064124 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/surveys/finished/20064124 as a consequence of this vulnerability and intentionality, i believe that i am being intentional with my time. i look at the comparative amount of time i spend with different people to ensure i have healthy connections and don't find myself pulled away from or too invested in certain people and priorities like my faith and family. i have used dorm mass as a way to prioritize my faith because i know how important it has been in making me feel a part of notre dame and reminding me how grateful i am to be here. i have taken a small step approach to college faith following fr. pete’s “knot advice” from mfye 3 to “first, be patient… second,... not operate under the belief what you did before will work again third, remain hopeful” (“the role of faith in our story” because starting college has a lot of changes, and i want to build simple habits into my routine like dorm masses or prayer before overextending and placing too much pressure on maturing my faith. i believe that i am creating a welcoming community. finding my college faith and making friends at notre dame specifically has given me a better understanding for the community i want. i enjoyed the opportunities to learn more about what differentiates notre dame and the way that it focuses on certain values to do that. the focus on strength of community, actually family, here at notre dame which pushes people to do more for all people is inspiring. this also helps me start to frame the intentionality of the experiences i have already had at notre dame. i think about the things in residential life like section dinners and one-on-ones or hall council as a part of notre dame welcoming me even if they just felt like simple, new activities. i liked that both fr. grove and dr. harris talks in mfye week 5 brought up the connection between people’s work at notre dame and their service community. it helped me see tangible examples of what it means to be notre dame and connected the idea of love and family to both on and off campus outreach. it made me proud and excited to be here where students, faculty and more are attentive to others no matter their connection. notre dame also helped me see diverse perspectives and ensures freedom of all stories on camps. this reflection is an important check in point for my own bias and a step toward making a more welcoming environment for all people and their stories to create the world around me. this connected a lot to the scientific american article in mfye week 7 which explained harshly blaming or profiling bias can do more harm than good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois moreau fye professor todd taylor october 15, 2021 beliefs constant and changing at our stage in life, beliefs are very difficult to define. college is a time when everything we know about the world is challenged. our experiences our placed in different lights as we hear others’ perspectives and day-to-day life takes on a different structure. however, the moreau first year experience class has helped me distinguish who i am and how my experiences are further forming my identity. by reflecting on where i came from, how that influences my life here and being exposed to new perspectives, i have slowly come to understand my core beliefs and to appreciate that they will continue to evolve throughout my time at notre dame. i believe that i am searching for fulfillment. we are ultimately seeking to compensate for what we lack and to retain or increase what brings us peace. it is easy to get caught up in a desire to pursue leadership and service positions or a prestigious internship and job opportunity and forget to work on our development as a person. sometimes the world presents these two goals as isolated from or independent of each other (david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy? youtube “should you live for your resume or your euology?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). in our culture, there is an emphasis on advancing adam i, yet i have found that when i ultimately place my personal formation first, success in academics follows, while if i reverse my priorities, life becomes unbearable. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by giving of myself. every relationship rests on a mutual regard and gift of self. if i do not offer my talents, gifts, time, and love to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim others, they cannot receive me and i will not be able to receive what the friendship they offer to me. at the same time, if i am rejected by others, then i can move on to others who will value the person that i am. dr. brown said people who felt worthy believed that what made them vulnerable also made them beautiful (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). so far in my college experience the most rewarding part has been the people i’ve met and bonded with, and i’ve found that when i don’t take a risk and put myself out of my comfort zone, i usually miss out on discovering someone amazing. many people have not responded accordingly, but these instances are teaching me that others’ opinions do not determine one’s worth. i believe that my purpose is to become who god made me to be so that i can learn to love him and bring him to the world. this pursuit will not only bring me peace and happiness, but it will empower me to make the world a better place. all our efforts will fall short if we attempt to work without god’s help and guidance, and notre dame has provided so many opportunities for me to grow in my trust for him. professor fagerberg talks about accepting each moment as an important part of god’s design, and this has become a recurring theme in my life as i try to focus on one homework assignment, one conversation, one prayer at a time (faith brings light to a dark world (grottonetwork.com) “faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg – moreau week 3). when life becomes scattered, i try to remind myself to accept everything that comes as a gift from god. i believe that i grow by making mistakes, accepting whatever happens as it comes, and listening with an open mind and heart. while some of these actions are very difficult, nothing worthwhile ever comes without challenge and suffering. it is my responsibility to accept these setbacks and learn from them, not become discouraged and blame my own shortcomings. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau everything happens for a reason and can contribute to our good. to take it even further, i have this responsibility to care for myself so that i can then use my gifts for others. this idea comes from the holy cross mission, which is so beautifully embodied in the life of fr. sorin. despite discomfort and the immensity of the task, he maintained a spirit of optimism and devotion towards his mission of establishing a great catholic university (sorin letter to moreau.pdf google drive, letter to bl. basil moreau by fr. sorin – moreau week 5). if i am not willing to be open to learning from my trials, they will prevent me from making the world a better place. i believe that i pursue truth by being curious in my studies and taking an interest in others’ stories. the message of chimamanda ngozi adichie’s talk really resonated with me, because i have always been interested in people, particularly their stories (chimamanda ngozi adichie: the danger of a single story | ted talk “the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau week 7). i love to learn about where they come from, what they love, who they are, what they want to become, and ever since coming to notre dame, i have discovered and been inspired by stories that are each so incredible despite being completely different from each other. my favorite week of moreau was week 6, when each member of the class shared their “where i am from” poem. the experience gave me an appreciation for just how diverse the student body is, but i was also struck by how much we hold in common. i believe that my community should embrace this diversity and continue to foster connections between people. the best experiences come from encountering new ideas in unexpected places, and the best ideas come from people. ultimately, my identity is inseparable from my relationship with god, for i strive to orient all my thoughts and actions towards him. whenever i doubt in this belief, i can feel myself becoming lost, not only in the world, but to myself. all the beautiful and worthwhile https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story things in my life begin and end in him. he is in the work i do, the people i meet, the ideas i learn, the activities i participate in, and in me. all my beliefs come back to faith, and while my understanding and perspective will continue to change, my foundation in god never will. microsoft word integration two moreau fall 2021.docx mcarthur 1 claire mcarthur moreau first year experience prof. retartha 3 december 2021 new experiences and new friends throughout this first semester, my value on new experiences and going outside my comfort zone has increased exponentially. at the beginning of the semester, the idea of a “friend group” felt ambiguous and scary. but now, i feel that i have found an amazing group of friends who are fun to be around and make me happy. the biggest thing i’ve learned in college is the need for authentic, genuine connections. the first few weeks of school, i felt like i couldn’t be real with my friends about how i was really feeling and what was going on in my life. topics like homesickness, family issues, and more felt off limits. however, i quickly realized that i would feel much better when i was able to be honest about my feelings with my friends. the week 11 moreau module included a quote that says, “we were created in and for a complex ecology of relatedness, and without it we wither and die” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). the need for community and need for connectedness is essential. not only did i feel better being honest and authentic with my friends, but it also deepened our friendship. letting them into my life allowed them to feel like i could be let into theirs, fostering a sense of community and belonging amongst my friends. over thanksgiving break, my dog was taken by a coyote one hour before i landed. i was – and still am – heartbroken but talking with friends and letting them know what is going on in my life has made the experience more bearable. mcarthur 2 unpacking the sadness of my dog dying with my friends has been essential for me to move on and heal from the experience. another realm of “the college experience” that felt vague and is now clearer is the social scene. the week 9 moreau module included a quote that says, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life – you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). over the summer, i idealized the college party scene. on move-in day, there was a gateway party. it was fun, but not as fun as i was expecting. i felt disappointed – what was wrong with me so that i couldn’t enjoy parties that my peers were so clearly enjoying? after beating myself up about it, i reminded myself that things that make me happy don’t necessarily make my classmates happy. i spent all summer hiking, which made me happy beyond words. however, some of my peers spent their summer working with animals or at the beach. while those activities are fun, they don’t fill my cup as they do for my peers. it was important for me to realize that, although parties are fun, they don’t fill my cup, which is perfectly fine. learning that it is okay to not do whatever everyone else is doing has been really fulfilling and important lesson for me to learn. i have learned it is okay to spend a night in with friends, even if that is not what “most” people are doing. being my true, authentic self means freely pursuing what truly makes me happy, regardless of what the masses are doing. this semester i have also been pushed outside of my comfort zone in terms of the new experiences and new people i have met. growing up, i attended a rather homogenous high school. almost everyone had a similar, christian background and most everyone’s parents worked at microsoft. after coming to college, i realized i had taken certain things from my suburban life for granted, assuming that that was just how things worked everywhere. the week mcarthur 3 10 module included a quote that says, “hatred often hides in self-righteous conviction – where it can be seen as driving the effort toward a noble goal” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten). growing up outside seattle, there was a very specific, liberal narrative that was pushed – a narrative that villainized the other side, all the people in the “red” states. coming to school, i knew that going to indiana was going to be a little bit of a culture change. not surprisingly, i’ve found people who are wonderful people from all walks of life, from michigan to new jersey to oklahoma. people who, regardless of their political views or backgrounds, are simply awesome humans. the narrative that people outside a certain state or area are “crazy” or “different” is a divisive mechanism used to demonize people who are far more like ourselves than we care to admit. although it was something i already subconsciously knew, coming to college taught me that a person’s background, political beliefs, or hometown does not really matter. what matters is who they are on the inside and how those experiences have affected and shaped the person they are today. the week 12 module includes a quote that says, “moreau’s trust in the cross is the essential component of his legacy” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau week twelve). people far and wide remember moreau for his unwavering trust and faith in god. they don’t remember him for the way he cooked or the way he dressed. rather, his legacy is his trust in god. learning from moreau, i have reflected on the importance of a legacy, especially at college. in college, you meet people all the time. some you meet in passing, others you spend more intentional time with and really get to know. regardless, people will always remember something about you. looking at moreau’s legacy, i want people to remember me for the way i make them feel. i want people to remember me as the girl who could always find the light in the dark, who was always a trusting friend to listen. while friendships come and go, i mcarthur 4 want whoever i get to know and spend time with to feel known and loved when they are around me. having a goal such as this for college is important, in my opinion. it informs the way you interact with people and the way you approach your college experience. reflecting on the moreau modules and my college experience thus far, i can assuredly say that my value on new experiences and going outside my comfort zone has greatly increased. doing this has led to amazing friends, funny memories, and so much more. norman 1 father kevin fys 10101.7 15 october 2021 my common core i believe that my purpose is to use my god-given talents in order to heal, unify, and transform the world. throughout many stages in my life, i have tried to fit in to a box that i thought others made for me. what i mean is, i thought other people cared mostly about my superficial qualities, so i created a box too small for myself and my beliefs. because of this, i felt lost for a long period of time, especially during middle school, leading up into freshman year. as a lowly freshman, my quest to branch out and become my own person quickly fell in to repeating old habits. i tried to make myself fit in to a certain group of friends that did not have much in common with me and did not value the same things. as a result, my friendships during this time fell under the unhealthy relationships side of the red flag campaign’s healthy vs. unhealthy relationships handout. in a manner of thinking like david brook’s ted talk “should you live for your resume or your eulogy”, i decided to take my life in to my hands. i wanted to live life as completely and utterly myself. on this mission of self-discovery, i found character strengths, most of them the same as i received in the via character strengths survey. i discovered that if i used these character strengths that i made more meaningful relationships and was able to support others because i had my own core. i also used this new-found empowerment to venture out and try new things. this led me to new countries and new classes where i learned that i want to integrate my passion of science and math with my desire to get to know and impact the world. i then applied to schools that held the same values as me. ultimately, i decided on notre dame because i knew this institution would provide more than the traditional education. i knew it would help me strengthen my god-given talents and i have already seen how i will be able to heal, unify, and transform the world. through solving problems in engineering design to discussing philosophers in foundation of theology, my education is multifaceted and will shape my mind to be a more understanding of others and myself. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being myself, being present, and allowing the other person to do the same. drawing on my response before, i went through a period during high school where i tried anything and everything to better get to know myself and those around me. i am naturally curious and realized that by living for others’ expectations of me that i had cut off this natural instinct of mine. as chimamanda ngozi adichie encourages in her ted talk “danger of a single story”, i wanted to discover the wonders of the world for myself instead of allowing others to inform me with their biases. by letting go of any pride i had about my preconceived notions, i found that i could truly listen to people’s stories. the connections i made through this process engrained my root belief in being present and allowing other people to be present with me. one of my favorite sayings is to be where your feet are. whenever i feel overwhelmed, i remind myself of this quote because it tells me to be grateful for the air i am breathing, the ground my feet are touching, and to enjoy the company i am with. i have always found it interesting how one person pulls out their phone and everyone at the table will follow. if i lead by example and challenge silence, a space is opened for people to talk and connect. my experience with this at notre dame has been bountiful and present during our moreau class. i remember sitting on south quad while we read “where i’m from” poems. by allowing a little silence, students were able to reflect inwards and come up with the strength to share their story. as important as it is to listen to stories, it is equally as important to be vulnerable and share your own. that is why i believe being myself is a key element in forging life-giving relationships. i believe that by connecting and being vulnerable with someone, you share a piece of your soul and i want to make sure i am being genuine in the relationships i make. i have tried hard to do that while at notre dame because i want a good foundation for potentially lifelong friendships. i believe that i am searching for how i fit in to the world. although i would like to believe that i have my life together, i realize that a confidence of self does not mean i am entirely sure of how i fit in to the world. this belief would not have been present in my mind before senior year but filling out college applications requires a lot more soul searching than meets the eye. i thought i knew my purpose and passion but that could change any day, especially when i am in a period of immense change. the uncertainty and newness of everyday in college has brought this search especially to the forefront of my mind. however, brené brown shares in her ted talk “the power of vulnerability” that vulnerability is not weakness as most people have been led to believe. while at notre dame, i have met so many different types of people, some who appear to have their whole lives together while other seems to be struggling to get to class every day. although i am somewhere in the middle, i have realized that it is most important to be vulnerable to myself. i need to check in with myself and acknowledge that this act of self-care does not mean i am weak or cannot handle this change. it simply means i am maintaining the work i have already put in to better myself. i do not know if i will every not have this belief because my path on life changes with every day. however, i know that i am in the right place to discover how i will get started into the world in years to come. 11/30/2021 theo helm jumping into my new home i’ve been around notre dame my whole life coming from south bend, so you would think i had some idea of what my life would look like once i arrived. instead, i didn’t know what to expect from life in college and how i’d handle being more independent. i’ve experienced some obstacles, but i would consider my first semester as a success since i’m in a good place mentally, academically, and socially. i’m excited to see how the rest of my freshman year unfolds. so far at notre dame, i’ve found new demands and stressors placed on me, but these have been more than balanced by the community i’ve found in baumer hall and the campus as a whole. at a university with so many talented and impressive students, i have fallen into the trap of trying to prove myself and measure up to other people’s standards. while i feel i have done well academically so far, that doesn’t necessarily stop myself from doubting my abilities. this imposter syndrome has made it tougher on me, but learning that it’s a common problem is comforting to hear. in week nine of moreau, i was especially intrigued by julia hogan’s thoughts that we shouldn’t set expectations for ourselves, because i have always lived by setting expectations and attempting to reach them. hogan contradicts my previous practices, saying, “but i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). reflecting on that lesson, i’ve realized that it is definitely helpful to have goals for myself but these shouldn’t be expectations that define me. to put this into practice, i plan to work hard to study and prepare for my theology final, but i will focus just on my preparation without worrying about performing poorly on the exam. the first two exams were rough for me, but i think i’ll be more relaxed with this strategy, and may even perform better by being more prepared but less stressed out about the eventual grade. overall, i want to continue to push myself to achieve my goals while making sure that these are strictly my own aspirations and that they don’t define my self-worth. during these first few months, i’ve found it both a blessing and a challenge that i’m finally able to make all my decisions on my own. without being home with my parents, i now have the responsibility to make the right choices with how i spend my time. this can definitely create some uneasiness, as i’m used to having the comfort of parents to guide me, but it’s also important for me to learn to make decisions individually. i appreciated what father jenkins said about conviction, as i have often thought that i should work on being more decisive. he asserted, “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia — the prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). jenkins also brings up a good discussion when talking about the other factors that can affect our decisions both positively and negatively. now that i live in a dorm, the main influences on my decisions are my friends. i feel that i definitely have a good group of friends that are focused on the right things, but of course i can’t always let them steer my life. for example, when they all want to do something social but i have work to get done, it’s crucial for me to learn how to say no so i can stay on the right track. this semester, i have been pretty good about this, but there is certainly room for improvement so that i make decisions based on my own priorities and not other people’s. the community i’ve experienced during my time in baumer hall is one of the main things that has made my notre dame experience so special thus far. from the moment i arrived and the welcome week crew helped transport my belongings to room 356, it has felt like home. since then, i’ve been lucky enough to build a few really strong relationships and find many other friends, which has been a huge part of easing my transition to college. there are a few people that i feel i don’t really understand or i disagree with their ideas, but as i realized from parker palmer, these people will always be around. he expressed, “relationships in community are so close and so intense that it is easy for us to project on another person that which we cannot abide in ourselves.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). while there have been a few people that fit this description, i feel that i get along with pretty much everybody, and i’ve learned to accept that some people will just be around. as much as we may wish them away, these enemies will always exist because we see negative aspects of ourselves in the people we interact with. although this may seem problematic to deal with, it means that community allows us to learn more about ourselves and realize the areas we need to improve. my baumer community has given me a place of comfort i can always come back to no matter what is going on in my life. these last few months, i’ve been prompted to think about my religious beliefs much more frequently than usual. i have always attended public school, and while my family goes to mass every week and prays before dinner, my relationship with god wasn’t something i thought about that much. now that i’m here, i have the opportunity to fully explore my beliefs and hopefully reach more clarity about these with more reflection and prayer. the excerpt from the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis was really interesting, because even the demon recognized that god’s love is completely real. lewis said, “one must face the fact that all the talk about his love for men, and his service being perfect freedom, is not (as one would gladly believe) mere propaganda, but an appalling truth.” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). since the devil brings people to his side through coercion and “absorbing” them, it is striking to think god works solely through love. when i get down or face failure, i need to remember this ever-present love and know that god has a plan for my life and a better future. i have always considered myself catholic and a believer in god, but now that i’m here i have a chance to reinforce my beliefs and grow stronger in my faith. my time at notre dame has made me certain that i found the right place for me, even when it gets difficult. the culture, the dome, and the amazing people all add up to create a truly special place. i have learned a great deal in these last few months, and i’m excited for all the personal growth the future brings. through whatever comes next in my life, i will be grateful for all the family and friends that are rooting for me and the tight-knit community i’ve found here. 11/27/2021 the path towards happiness there are many things thing’s i have encountered throughout the course of moreau and my first semester at notre dame, a lot of these things have helped me develop as a person, and i believe has helped me become a better person. from all the people that i have met, to all the qqc and weeks of moreau, it has helped me encounter new experiences and outlooks to which i never thought i would encounter. the journey i have had a notre dame has shown me many new experiences and will probably show me many more. but, as i reflect on my time here, i’m sure those new experiences will be fulfilling ones that will help me grow as a person. being at notre dame has helped me encounter a lot of new perspectives on life, which has broadened my outlook on the world. it has allowed me to see the good things that can come out of working as parts in a whole, and overall being apart of the community i will belong to for four years and beyond. not only has it helped me home in on the good things that life can offer, but it has also helped me see the many ways in which life can illicit despair and sadness. something akin to being broken, being here has allowed me to see that many things in this life is cracked and can make someone broken in the long run. but in seeing that there are cracks in life, i have also seen that the ways to mend those cracks exist, “all of the loss that you are feeling . . . i want you to put those into the pot” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop ” by grotto, kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). reflecting on the cracks to me is the most important thing to do, as this often leads to new experiences, as your outlook changes. one of the biggest aspects of notre dame to me has been the importance of community in notre dame, which has helped me mend some of the cracks in my life, whether those be superfluous or not. i was surprised at the place to which i would encounter once i got here, and now that i am firmly into the place i was once new too, it has all but shown me that the cracks can be mended from being apart of something, making a change that only you can make, or a facet of the group that can only be accomplished by yourself. a community that is not discriminatory in nature, where anyone can join as” the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as “enemy.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) this type of community has helped shaped the encounters i have had at notre dame and is a big reason why i think the encounters i will have in the future of me living in this school will continue to shape me into a better person. a person who has a good balance in all aspects of life and makes sure to use the things he learned to do good on this planet. i have always been confident in my abilities, since i always thought it was that confidence that allowed for me to excel high enough to get into notre dame, but still at points since i have been here, there have been many times in which i thought my abilities would not be high enough to tackle the task i would need to do. i have learned many new things here, and those new things took time to learn and cultivate, in that time its very easy to feel overwhelmed and not up to the task. but through the community i found, i find that this feeling naturally has dissipated as i have been here for a longer time. especially https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ since “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you must perfect, what if you just did your best”. (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) this type of feelings can only be accomplished when you are around those who stay by your side for you, rather than you’re here that i have at notre dame has made these feelings all but dissipate, and i think that’s one of the highlights of my notre dame journey so far. i think that my faith has further been shaped by my stay here and has further defined it in a meaningful way. i think that my faith has been able to take through the darkest moments being here, which would all encompass the many times in which i thought that things were overtly difficult. it reminds me of the reason why i decided to come here knowing that it would be hard. my faith helps me stay on the path that leads to my goals, and it the hardest times helps me stay on the paths to my goals. it allows for me to cultivate myself as a person as “they constitute the foundation of an education in the faith, but a person’s capacity for lifelong discipleship is hard to predicate from exam results or resumes no matter how well formed he or she may be “ (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week one) living in faith has helped me grow in a multi-faceted way, not only defining one part of me but all of me, it defines my decisions and actions, and if i did not have as strong a faith as i do, i don’t know where i would be now. it has allowed for me to encounter the hope needed to excel at the things i do best. i think everyone needs to have something that they believe in, which allows them to push through the hard times to achieve their goals. notre dame has helped me further define my beliefs and in turn my faith. i would like to think that it has been for the better, as i feel like i am able to encounter experiences that i was not able to handle when i first got here. moreau’s first half has been a good experience, i don’t think without it i would not have been able to settle in as easily as i did to this school. it allows for reflection, a sort of buffer zone from the daily life of being here. the settling in process was very seamless, and as someone who came in a week after everyone that says something about this process. my experiences at the university has been going really well, and i know this will continue into the future. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575/download?download_frd=1 yusman_integration 2 yusman 1 professor wagner moreau fye 30 nov. 2021 in my time at notre dame... in my time at notre dame, i’ve encountered dissonance. i came to a place where i knew nobody, where i had no friends. i felt alone and out of touch with the going ons of the campus. while everyone was making new friends and hanging out, i was buried in my room beneath papers and worksheets. however, i’ve found that, as emery bergmannsaid in her nyt article advice from a formerly lonely college student, “people are not alone in being alone.”1 just like emery eventually came to realize, there were others around me having similar experiences, especially in my classes. by beginning to reach out and talk to some of those that sat around me, bonding in the time we had. i found friends where previously there were only strangers. in addition, as i became used to the college life, i started to organize my time more. by sorting out what i was doing and when, i gained free time to spend with others and strengthen those new friendships. continuing this outlook into the future, i can begin to look at the world in a less lonely way. seeing that others are feeling the same, and joining together to overcome the dissonance we’re met with in our lives. in my time at notre dame, i’ve encountered brokenness. from the outside, notre dame appears to be a perfect college of joy and hope for the world, and to some degree it is, but when i arrive i found it to be different. yes, i think it is one of the greatest forces for good in this nation, but, it is not void of the brokenness that plagues much of society today. different cliques form almost instantly between freshman groups, ousting people from the beginning, even if not yusman 2 intentionally. those of non-catholic faiths are hesitant to share their beliefs, even if others may be willing to accept them. there is a brokenness from fear, that, although in many cases unjustified at notre dame, comes from an outside world in which the fear is justified. as kirsten helgeson, a kintsugi artist, has found, many people have dealt with adversity, conflict, and challenges. these make their life harder to live and pull them from their true selves over time.2 how, then, do i respond to this brokenness? kintsugi, the japanese art form that helgeson teaches, is about making something new from that which is broken. in the same way, i think that out of the brokenness of many, something new may be created. brokenness is not hopelessness, but hope in need of assembly. in the same way that nations band together in hard times, so too may the broken within notre dame. in my time at notre dame, i’ve encountered community. truly, from my first day on campus, it has felt like notre dame is a university pregnant with community. a truly palpable will from almost everyone to join in communion with those around them. however, the will to build community is not enough on its own. more is required from all involved. as i talked about earlier in the dissonance i encountered, it was only when i opened my self up to others that i formed communities with them. just as in the with voices true snapshot summary, community begins with listening.3 by listening to those nearby to me, opening myself up to not only their words, but their ideas, their personalities, their perspectives, community arose. these communities bring joy and fulfillment to all involved. support in hard times, and celebration in accomplishments. as agustine fuentes says in his talk, diversity matters, by listening to all of those around us, we open ourselves up to new ideas and perspectives. from these we can grow ourselves, our communities, and those around us. and in a chain-reaction of interconnectedness, we can begin to improve and open up those larger communities. not simply immediate friend yusman 3 groups, but universities, towns, and nations. the united states has recently begun to go through one such growth of community. previously excluded groups are being welcomed in, and people are beginning to listen to them. to learn what it means to be african american, hispanic, or lgbtq+. by listening to these groups, working to include them in community, we may all grow and become better human beings. in my time at notre dame, i’ve encountered hope. hope is an essential part of notre dame. father sorin wrote that notre dame would become a great force for good in the nation, and by this it would become a force for hope as well. the key to this lies in notre dame’s roots in faith. faith, as fr. james king states, in hope holy cross and christian education, is the foundation of hope. it is by “trusting in the cross and god's promise of kingdom” that one may find hope in their life.4 i’ve found this to be true. many times i’ve felt hopeless at notre dame, whether it was because of arguments between friends, or an overwhelming number of assignments. many times i’ve taken a walk over to the grotto or prayed while i sat and thought. these exercises of faith helped to open my mind to the possibility of hope. in following my faith i’ve been able to look at the bigger picture. seeing my life as a journey towards the good i can give to the world, rather than looking at the stresses of the present. in addition, faith can also give hopeful goals. as we live our lives, we may assume that we are working towards communion with god rather than sin. this greater goal of life, a core teaching of the christian faith, is one of hope. we are being guided by the word and actions of god towards that which is best for us. this is not to say that we may live our lives carelessly. rather, through a pursuit of faith we may find hope, and in following that hope we may be lead by god on a path towards the good which we were meant to be. yusman 4 works cited 1. “advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine 2. “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten 3. “with voices true” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven 4. “holy cross and christian education” by fr. james king moreau fye week twelve https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105431/holycrossandchristianeducation.pdf december 3rd, 2021 “finding tranquility in the turbulent waters of freshman year” moreau first year experience fall 2021 prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? with the fall semester coming to an end, as freshman it is essential to look back and reflect on the most impactful moments, relationships, emotions, and overall learning experiences that have been lived, finding a way to contemplate, learn from, and adjust for the semester to come. personally, the previous months have been ones of growth, personal development, and adjustment to a life that has exceeded my expectations. everyone has their own unique response to the initially overwhelming question, “why nd?,” but it is this individuality that makes the one-of-a-kind notre dame community. specific instances such as spending time at the grotto, going to daily mass, and participating in discussion in classes like moreau; i have explored the backgrounds and cultures of each individual i come across, allowing me to delve deep into the question of what makes me the person i am. constantly going back to this central question of meaning and belonging, i have also begun to focus on the characteristics of my personality that add positive value to my community and those around me. identifying what influences my actions, behaviors, emotions, and thoughts has been essential to achieving balance in such a chaotic environment and learning that every once in a while it is okay to say “no.” being on my own in a place full of unlimited resources, support, and beautiful sceneries; the once overwhelmingly complex question of “what do i believe in?” has become a conversation i enjoy having and sharing with others as well. at notre dame, i find that we are given endless possibilities to become the student, friend, mentor, and overall person we have always wanted to be and hope to become. as father moreau intended, “notre dame is a vision that takes young people from their earliest days of grappling with ideas and making sense of the world around them to preparing them for lifelong discipleship in a supportive environment that nourishes their gifts and fuels their desire for god.” (“holy cross and christian education'' by james b. king moreau fye week twelve). there is no doubt that through the ups and downs of the first few months of the “real world,” expectations are challenged, priorities are set, goals are created, and individual hopes and dreams push us to keep believing in what’s to come. contrary to popular belief, i sensed that following the first few months of my notre dame journey, social pressures and expectations have actually lowered in significance and presence among friends and family. in the beginning, the overwhelming reality of college is not always clear and tends to contrast the unique expectations of the individuals who arrive on campus. many tend to mask their true selves with the fear of being judged by others, the fear of being a misfit in what is commonly known as the “nd family,” leading “these individuals [to] believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves).” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) however, over time i’ve seen numerous individuals understand that perfection is just an illusion and begin to open up, become more vulnerable, and minimize the susceptibility to social pressures and the academic, familial, societal, and personal expectations that were present in the first place. as time goes on, the capability for true friendship and interpersonal connection is clear. for me, it was my relationship with god that really blossomed over this first semester, as stressors and expectations only pushed me closer to my faith and trusting that i can only control the effort i put into relationships, academic, friendships, etc. and for the rest i know god will do what’s right for me. i also came to value the importance of mindfulness, prayer, and rest. notre dame's “work hard play hard” mentality is not a lie, as with few exceptions, almost all students are busy doing something they love for the entirety of their days, making it difficult to balance time in order to meet all basic human needs as well as all social, health, and academic requirements. it’s difficult, yet possible, to find balance in such an environment, however this requires thought, commitment, and a few bumps in the road to find the right path to success. speaking in regards to the things that have become clearly significant or important in my life over the past few months, i also realize the previously simple aspects of everyday life that grew in complexity as the semester breezed past. relationships, bonds between god, friends, and family, have been catalyzed, stagnated, transformed, and many even broken as a result of the first few months of college life. as previously mentioned, my personal relationship with god has only flourished and blossomed over the past few months; however, as i see my friends in other universities across the globe, i see how god, or any divine power, is slowly slipping away from their lives and so i’ve grown to value the notre dame institution so much more. additionally, with distance and limited time, it has become clear to me who my true friends are, what i value most in these individuals, and how this may help me construct life-giving relationships with the new friends i come across in my college journey. i’ve realized that “we cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation...we need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) being away from those individuals we once shared every second of the day with only deepens our love, our bond, and the value of those relationships that truly matter, filtering out those that are burdens rather than catalysts of personal growth and happiness. although at times difficult to come to terms with, college is an experience with unimaginable changes both good and bad, which i am positive will shape me into the person i hope to become and give me the gift of discerning the things of most importance. reflecting back on the numerous days that made up the fall semester, each different from the one before, i know each of those moments brought with them lessons both good and bad. looking around me, i see many struggle to find their place, others battle with adjustments in their studies, friendships, faith, and love; while there exist a few that are unaffected by the college transition. as father jenkins states in his commencement speech, “[we] here today, more than others, have the responsibility, and the training, and the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today — the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love...love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by john i. jenkins moreau fye week ten) not one of us is similar to our neighbor in how these first months have treated us; however, i am confident that i speak on behalf of my peers in saying that college has made clear the importance of unquestionable faith, trust in others, and love even for the person one disliked the most. here at notre dame, as time goes on i know that i am always one step closer to becoming the student, the friend, the daughter, the leader, and most importantly the disciple i want to be. through reflection, valuing the good and learning from the bad, i know that i continue to write and polish my answer to the question, “why nd?”. integration 2 thomas assaf october 15, 2021 moreau retartha the path which has shaped me the question of what have i encountered and how will i respond to those things is a question that looks at how i have gone through my life and how have i or will i respond to things that have happened to me. the first thing i think about when i read this question is what adversity. adversity immediately makes me think of one of my favorite rappers, eminem, he rhymes “i been chewed up and spit out and booed off stage, but i kept rhymin' and stepped right in the next cypher” in his song lose yourself. this lyric reminds me that even successful people fail to then succeed and the only way you truly fail is to stop trying. while in life i have not experienced a large amount of adversity, as i am a person who will (hopefully)graduate with a degree one of the best universities in the world with no student debt and have been given many opportunities that are not normally available to kids my age throughout my life, i still believe that what i have encountered in my life thus far is very important. the first lesson i learned at notre dame is when i asked myself the question of why i am here, outside of the football, family ties, or academics, what i came up with was that i am here because i realized when going through my college process that it is your responsibility to put yourself in a position to be your best self and succeed in whatever you are striving for. i looked at the people i surrounded myself with and how i was conducting myself in the first month or so and realized that i made the right choice. while in high school i learned one of the most important things in my life through an encounter with my head of upper school who was also my ap us history teacher, in my junior year. in this encounter he explained to me that do not look at school as just something to go try your best at and it is what it is. he explained that it is a game just as lacrosse is a game, to play the game is to compete every minute like it is your last opportunity to prove that you are the best. this mentality of playing the game is something that gets me going. to play the game of school is not just doing the homework and studying, it is completing to beat a quiz or test, but this applies to life if you want to be successful in life you cannot get to the point you want to get to if you just do what everyone else does you must compete and win to become successful. the way i responded to this encounter with him was to earn a 100 gpa in my junior and senior year, and achieved what i wanted, which was to go to notre dame. one thing that has grown even in my time at school more in importance is the value of relationships and loyalty in the world today. building relationships and keeping them being key to life has always been known by me seeing as my dad's job as a head of school is majority being a people person. but at notre dame i have seen even more but this time through my own friends that loyalty is not something that you buy in college or get because of who you know, you earn it and to earn someone's loyalty starts with building a relationship with that person. finding friends is not always easy though, it's not a walk in the park like the kids who talk about it say it is, it's hard to find people who you genuinely want to be around when you start so much else new in your life at the same time. my first couple weeks of school i was not connecting with some guys that i liked being around, but i figured out that it was no one's fault but effort of trying to build relationships with those people and so i did. i have now created amazing relationships in so many different groups of people because i encountered that difficulty and i was struggling but i learned and fought through it. the idea of hope has grown in importance through my time at notre dame, whether it is the hope that the university hired marcus freeman or hope that i did well on my business tech midterm, hope is what drives us. i used to think hope was just for overly optimistic people, but hope is what makes you take that chance or that risk, because without hope you would never leave your comfort zone. without hope you would never introduce yourself to someone on the move-in day or try a new class that you think you might like. it is hope that sparks us to move forward in life and explore without hope life would be boring and uninteresting. (week 13 qqc). the last encounter i want to talk about in my life is an encounter with my best friend, justin, a classmate of mine in high school that turned into a member of my family. justin's family was evicted his sophomore year of high school and he lived with me during the school week. justin and i were very close before that, but this made us brothers. i saw what adversity he went through, and it taught me even more on how lucky i am in life. while justin was living with us, we did everything together, this showed me what a family was because as the youngest i was always following or being brought places, but i was finally bringing someone into our family, and it is the most important thing i have done in my life thus far. microsoft word integration 2.docx december 3, 2021 my first defining encounters at notre dame over the course of my first semester at notre dame, i have had many new experiences and encountered several questions which have helped me to develop as an individual. the weekly qqcs in moreau have given me the opportunity to reflect on these experiences and derive meaningful takeaways. during my transition to college i encountered dissonance when i experienced imposter syndrome. in an article for the grotto, julia hogan wrote; “these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life" (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, grotto – moreau fye week nine). hogan is referring to external forces which often have an influence on people’s goals and aspirations. this can lead to individuals not pursuing their desired path, but conforming to others’ expectations. i found that i encountered these pressures since notre dame’s prestige and academic rigour creates an environment in which every person is intelligent and uniquely talented. i began to feel as if i did not belong because i was not as smart or skilled as other students. however, i think that the community of notre dame is accepting of all choices and encourages its students to find their own path which has been comforting to me in my decision making. in discussion with my peers, it was helpful to learn that i was not alone in experiencing imposter syndrome and that we could grow and learn together while comforting one another. i believe that experiencing these feelings has also pushed me grow stronger emotionally and take a step back to look at the bigger picture to realize that i do belong. i have learned that being surrounded by other accomplished students and people should not be looked at as a competition, but a gift because they can push me to be my best self and work harder. overall, the internal conflict and dissonance that i encountered when transitioning to this new environment has been beneficial in deepening my self-knowledge. encountering brokenness is another theme that i have had to navigate since being in college. in his wesley seminary address, father jenkins references pope john paul ii: “we cannot proclaim the love of god in christ without seeking the unity of all christians" (“wesley theological seminary 2022 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). this idea can not only be applied to the catholic community, but any group of people and society as a whole. a community of individuals cannot be fully united until each member experiences a feeling of love and belonging, otherwise there is a divide and therefore brokenness. it is important to be able to recognize these divides and strive to create solutions which will create a sense of unity. at notre dame, each individual comes from a different background and has faced varying challenges while having had unique experiences. although these may differ from person to person, here we are all driven by common forces and are brought together by the school’s accepting and tight-knit community. moreau classes were one opportunity that gave us the ability to reflect upon and share our unique perspectives to understand one another and realize that we are all alike in some respect. we continue to respond to these realizations by learning from each other and celebrating our uniqueness while being proud of the diverse community of individuals that we represent. forging these connections and encountering brokenness has provided me with new outlooks on life and approaches to problemsolving. i encountered a new community upon arriving to notre dame that i have become proud to represent. in the article thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer writes, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy,’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal – moreau fye week eleven). the principal ideas of community are inclusivity and embracing both the good and the bad in order to grow. it is inevitable that not all members of a community will share the same opinions on every subject matter. however, what is important is that despite conflicts and disagreements, we find a way to stand strong together in the end. there have been times since coming to campus that my peers and i have been in disagreement or conflict of opinion, but we shared our ideas and reasoning to learn from one another’s perspective. it has been vital not to jump to conclusions and to always listen to other people’s beliefs to gain a better understanding and bring us closer through the inclusion of all ideas. communities are essential platforms which can be used to educate others about significant issues and subjects, not only to make people aware but to forge connections. coming to notre dame has shown me the importance of community and what ideas that word truly encapsulates. being at notre dame, i encounter hope on an everyday basis which has been enlightening in many respects. in the screwtape letters, c.s. lewis explores the idea that; "as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty" (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). struggles throughout life are inevitable and nobody will ever follow one clear and distinct path. since coming to college, i have i have been conflicted on deciding what i want to study and ultimately pursue in the future. not having a clear path laid out for me made me nervous and stressed, but i have now realized that it is normal to be unsure, so i can just have faith that i find my passion and will be led in the right direction. overall, i have learned the significance of having hope when situations may seem suboptimal. since coming to notre dame i have encountered so many new ideas and perspectives which has caused me to become more aware and strengthened my self-knowledge. i look forward future encounters that i will have and continuing on a path of personal development throughout my journey here. microsoft word moreau integration natalia.docx moreau fye integration october 15, 2021 what makes me who i am our lives are relevant due to what our beliefs are and how we live for them. in my opinion, discovering my beliefs and understanding why i seek to follow them is what eventually will lead me to embrace real happiness. people tend to look for happiness, but i believe happiness is found within ourselves. therefore, i feel it's quite important to recognize my beliefs and the things i value the most, to use them as a motivation and guide to pursuing my future goals in life. that way, i can become the person i aspire to be. i believe that i grow by allowing myself to be vulnerable. i consider it very important to acknowledge that vulnerability is key to living a real, authentic, and passionate life. as stated in (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brownmoreau fye week one) “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen.” this quote emphasizes how important it is to show our true selves in order to create healthy and genuine relationships with others and even with ourselves. showing our true selves begins with accepting that it’s normal to struggle with vulnerability but that it’s very important to embrace it no matter how difficult or uncomfortable it is. being vulnerable is what, in the end, will lead us to feel real emotions and passion; it’s what makes us authentic and, most importantly, real. i consider myself as someone who doesn’t like to feel so vulnerable nor uncomfortable. i wouldn’t say i like showing my insecurities, and sometimes i even refuse to accept them since i struggle with putting myself in a situation where i’m not in control. moreover, i’ve often avoided trying to engage in different activities or even open myself to new people because of the fear of putting myself vulnerable. however, i feel that now i understand better the importance of being vulnerable and accepted that showing my true self makes my relationships and life more real. therefore, i recognize that i need to keep working on improving this about myself to be able to embrace vulnerability and, more importantly, my true self. i believe that i'm searching for my most authentic self, and in order to find it, i feel it is necessary to first acknowledge my weaknesses. following what david brook stated in (should you live for your resume or your eulogy?, moreau fye week two), "atom 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses, you go into yourself you find the sin which you committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin, and you wrestle that sin". i agree that to know your character and become a strong and real person, it's essential to find those weaknesses that make us act incorrectly or commit mistakes. sometimes it's hard to accept those weaknesses, but it's essential to understand that accepting them will eventually lead us to a better place. after we acknowledge what makes us act in ways we don't like, we can fight it and become the person we aspire to be with the characteristics and principles we value. this reflection relates to the first topic we saw in class about being vulnerable because, to find our weaknesses, we first got to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. this isn't something that comes easy, and personally, i've always struggled with putting myself vulnerable and even more with accepting my weaknesses. this reflection reminds me of when i was little, and i used to fight a lot with my little sister. i remember how hard it was to accept when it was my fault and when i had done things wrong. however, as mentioned earlier, now that i'm grown, i feel i understand the importance of accepting both, being vulnerable and recognizing our weaknesses. furthermore, i feel more motivated to work on and improve these aspects of my life. that way, i can become the most authentic version of myself and seek a real and passionate life. i believe that i am made to live a life based on hope and faith. when talking about hope, i feel it's essential to emphasize its significance, specifically the importance of hope by the hand of god. that's why i chose this quote from the video (the role of faith in our story, fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c, moreau fye week three), "hope is confident because it rests upon god's power, not our own." as stated in the video and the text, hope keeps us going forward; it helps us stand back on our feet even in the worst times. hope and faith work in unison to help us understand the significance of life and trust that god's path is indeed the right one. i feel it's important to recognize the connection between faith and hope because, through our faith in god, we will find hope and motivation to seek that life we are looking for and, more importantly, true happiness. from all the topics we've seen in this class, this has been one of my favorites. i feel we can relate to it very much, and i enjoyed learning more about it. i believe we should all live a life based on faith. it gives us motivation and lets us live at peace. i've had many moments in which my faith starts fading away, but it is precisely in those moments that i realize how important it is to believe in god and believe in his reasons for doing everything he does. it's essential to accept that he has all the correct answers and that by living a life by his side, i'll gain more happiness, more joy, and more peace. i'll feel deeply connected to something greater than myself. i consider that i'm very clear of my beliefs, and i have faith in god and his power. furthermore, i'm ready to keep discovering more significant things about faith and keep seeking it. i'm sure i'll be able to do so, attending such a religious university like notre dame. i love the connection with faith that the university has and the safe and small places that make us feel at peace and at home. for example, the grotto, my favorite place on campus, makes me feel deeply connected to god and, more importantly, allows me to reflect on myself. i'm hoping to become a better version of myself, and i know that i'll be able to do it through my faith and at notre dame. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by first identifying whether the relationship is healthy or unhealthy. i believe it's imperative to recognize whether a relationship is good for us or not. sometimes, we stay with people because of comfort or because they've always been around. but i believe it's precisely in those moments that we should take a minute to analyze what that relationship is bringing to our lives and how it is making us feel. i chose the quote "the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face." (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship, olivia t. taylor, grotto, moreau fye week four), because i believe it has a lot of power and meaning. even though it seems like a common phrase, we rarely ask ourselves how we feel after hanging out with our friends. it isn't easy to recognize a healthy or unhealthy relationship, but i think this question is a great place to start. this topic is compelling, and i can relate to it very much since i've had some unhealthy relationships throughout my life. that's why i know it's essential to understand how much damage a toxic relationship can do to a person. it can lower our self-esteem as well as lead us to the wrong places. moreover, i feel that the point of having close relationships is to feel deeply connected to the person, understood, loved, and vice versa. it doesn't matter how much time we've been in a relationship with someone. if it starts to get unhealthy and there's nothing else we can do to make the relationship healthy again, i believe we should walk away. yes, it will be very hard if we sincerely care for this person but, that's why it is essential to understand that in the end, we'll be so much better without a toxic relationship in our lives. i believe that my community should stop stereotyping others and instead embrace all our differences. to do this, we first should recognize our identity and our values and also acknowledge and respect the values and beliefs of others. most of the time, those values and beliefs will differ from ours, but it's important to respect them as well. this can relate to the quote, "this emotional and moral knowledge should give us a sense of identity, a sense of ideals to live up to and an appreciation of the values that matter most to us — equality or prosperity or freedom.". ( how to destroy truth, david brooks, moreau fye week seven) most of the time, people create barriers and push others away because of their different beliefs. this behavior should change, and rather than judging someone from their ideas, culture, etc., we should accept them and embrace the differences that people bring to our world. i feel that now that i've arrived at college, i've had the opportunity to analyze myself, and i've realized how i have an implicit bias within me. i feel this can affect me negatively, and i would like to enrich my knowledge and perspectives by getting out of my comfort zone and improving this about myself. i think it's essential to understand other's perspectives and opinions as well as your own. i've been starting to improve this by engaging in different recreational activities on campus, allowing me to connect with different people with diverse backgrounds and beliefs. i'm grateful to attend such a prestigious university in which diversity thrives. i'm excited to continue this journey, take advantage of this opportunity, and allow myself to understand the beauty of diversity. i believe that where i come from has had a significant influence on who i am today. these beliefs, which have formed me, developed thanks to my roots, my country, and my family. i come from a small country in which diversity thrives and culture and tradition flourishes. most importantly, i come from a family of 4 whose knowledge and guidance i have used to grow. i come from all the friends and people i've encountered throughout my life, and all the experiences and lessons i've learned, which have made me the person i'm today. i’m glad i can proudly say i come from a small country known to be the bridge of the world and the heart of the universe, but above all, i'm happy to say i come from a place i can call home. following this, now that i've acknowledged all the values and beliefs i've gained from my experiences and from where i'm from, i can embrace and use them to grow as a notre dame student. i believe that i pursue truth by seeking both faith and reason. i believe faith and reason are both very important components that i need to embrace to succeed and become the person i aspire to be. as mentioned in (two notre dames: your holy cross education, fr. kevin grove, c.s.c, moreau fye week five). “if we are really searching for truth in whatever we study then we need both faith and reason.” this quote seems very relevant because i feel it's essential to address this topic now that i'm in notre dame. as mentioned in the last paragraph, i believe it is critical to understand the importance of my beliefs, in this case, faith and reason for my education and my future years at notre dame. furthermore, what i like the most is that here in notre dame, i'll be able to seek faith and reason, but more importantly, there's a whole community of people with the same values and principles as myself. as said in the video, there is an entire faculty of people, including priests and alumni, with the same beliefs as ourselves. people to whom we can relate and even ask for help and motivation at certain times. living in a place where people understand the importance of faith makes me feel more comfortable and accompanied. furthermore, it makes me feel like i belong. sometimes, things will not be perfect, however, i know that i can rely on the spiritual guide that notre dame offers. all of these make me confident that this is the place where i want to grow and become the person i aspire to be, spiritually and academically. these beliefs that i mentioned before have shaped me into the person i've become today. that's how i know how important it is to keep sticking to my beliefs and values to seek success. for me, success comes from knowing that everything i've accomplished has been with integrity. that is why i aspire to get an outstanding academic education along with a growth in ethical values during my college years. by saying growth in ethical values, i mean focusing on allowing myself to be vulnerable and accepting my weaknesses. moreover, seeking faith and religion and following my desire to live a life full of hope by the hand of god. that way, i can become someone real, authentic, and true. i'm very grateful i have the opportunity to call this university, in which love, religion, and spirit prevails, my second home. furthermore, with the motto that the university always promotes: the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart, i'm certain i'll be able to educate my mind and my heart, becoming the successful and compassionate professional i've always wanted to be. bibliography the power of vulnerability by brené brownmoreau fye week one should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brookmoreau fye week two the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.cmoreau fye week three 5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor, grottomoreau fye week four how to destroy truth, by david brooksmoreau fye week seven two notre dames: your holy cross education by fr. kevin grove, c.s.cmoreau fye week five integration integration moreau 10/15 how does want to be remembered? i believe that my purpose is to become the best version of myself while at college. i have an excellent background that i know was created by my family and specifically by my parents. now that i am off to college and on my own, i must continue to challenge myself and create that version of that i want to be. i think that starts with humbling myself and looking into where i may fall short of my desires. the idea of humbling ourselves leads into week one, referring to vulnerability. i must be vulnerable and look into those things in my life that i don't like about myself and work on them. working on something that i try to hide is very difficult and scary for me. this leads into a quote that i found in week one, "i learned this from research is that you cannot successfully numb emotion." ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one) i take this and understand that you cannot hide from your downfalls. it might be easy to try and numb or turn away from the things that i do that aren't perfect. if i want to become my best self, i need to accept these negative emotions, embrace them, and fix them. this will create a baseline for me to build up my version of myself from the ground up. this leads into the second week, where we discussed our strengths and weaknesses as people. my top three strengths were honesty, spirituality, and leadership. when i look deeper into these traits, it reminds me of where i developed them. i created these from my family and being the youngest of five. that reminded me of a quote from week two that says, "nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore, we must be saved by love." ("should you live for your resume" by david brooksmoreau fye week two) i wouldn't say a loved one necessarily saved me, but my loved ones are the ones who allowed me to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim accomplish these traits. these top three traits are essential to keep in mind when i am searching for my best self. keeping these traits at the top and developing others will be crucial to my development. building off of one of my strengths is spirituality. in week three, we discussed how we see faith through our world. for me, faith is vital, and my spirituality is one of my main focuses when trying to develop my best self. being away from home, you have more freedom, and some things for me, like going to church every sunday, might not be my main focus. to become my best self, i must focus on making it to mass every sunday and devoting time to god so he can help me in the pursuit of my best self. i have been very good at this so far, and i must continue to work at it. also, a quote from this week stands out, "hope directs our desire toward its true end, which is the kingdom of heaven." ("the role of faith in our story" by pete mccormickmoreau fye week three)my faith is rooted in hope, but i believe it is more than that. i hope to make it into the kingdom of heaven in the end, but if i want to make it there, i must continue developing my faith and who i want to become. this allows hope to turn into an excitement for the kingdom of heaven. in week four, we discussed what it means to be and create life-long relationships. going off to college was a serious concern of mine. i have a serious girlfriend from high school with whom i believe i have created a life-giving relationship. the idea of being away from her for such long periods made me nervous. this is something that i was going to have to find a solution to. focusing on calling her daily and checking in has kept my priorities in line and allows me to continue to focus on what it means to be my best self. if i didn't make this a priority, i could have turned it into a toxic relationship. an example of how this could've turned into a toxic relationship is explained in this quote, "sometimes the seemingly minor plan cancellations can lead to major disappointments in your friendship like if they bail on going with you to a social event where you won't know anyone else" ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia taylormoreau fye week four) if i were to not focus on our agreement of calling each other https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ everyday, it will lead to disappointment and eventually the downfall of our relationship. instead, i work hard at this, and our relationship continues to grow. in week five, we discussed how our life stories shape our journeys. i found this to be something that i can relate to very easily. the majority of my stories have revolved around sports and cabin weekends. sports have allowed me to develop skills that might not always be attainable by others. it has also led me into challenges that i may not have wanted to face. the quote, "god did not give us the spirit of fear but of power, love, and a sound mind" ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harismoreau fye week five) i find this to be very important when it comes to sports. i tend to get nervous and uneasy before games. i need to work on giving my anxieties to god if i want to become my best self. if i sit around doing all the worrying, i take out god's role in my life, and god can do more in my life than i can. in week six, we discussed where we are from. i chose to write about my cabin because this is where the majority of my happiest memories were made. cabin weekends are a place where my previous identity was created. this is where i spent most of my time with my family and growing my relationships with them. there are countless stories that i have learned from and have been allowed to make while at my cabin. i believe the best version of myself is on full display while i am there. i have encountered many different outdoor tasks and projects, and i believe this makes me unique. i have learned a lot from my father over the years, and i believe these qualities are ones that i will use for the rest of my life. with that being said, it is hard to continue to grow those while off at college, but i believe i use them in my daily life while here. in our last week, we discussed the challenges of a single story. i think in my case, this has to do with stereotypes. being a football player here at notre dame comes with glory but also judgments. something that i am going to do while here is trying to break some of those stereotypes. there are some negative stereotypes built around athletes and specifically football players. my goal is to create a version of myself where i am remembered as first and a football player second. i think the first thing this requires is making friends outside of football and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 building those relationships. one issue i have with stereotypes comes from a quote from that week, "it isn't nice to think we aren't very nice" ("how to destroy truth" by chimamanda ngozimoreau fye week seven). we, as people, i believe are not as nice as we should be. i think part of this is that we judge people before we get to know them and off of stereotypes. instead, if we give people the benefit of the doubt and get to know them, i think we as a society would be much nicer, allowing people to grow into who they want to be. when it comes to becoming who i want to be and how i want to be remembered, i must first remember my past. i need to focus on what qualities allowed me to succeed and which didn't. then i need to take those positive qualities and allow them to grow in the present. following those traits will allow me to become who i want to be and develop new characteristics. finally, i need to enable the future to unfold and take new experiences as learning lessons and not judge them before i experience them. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare integration 2 anderson 1 david pruitt moreau fys-10101-78 3 december 2021 first steps and their lessons in any time of immense change, one will inevitably encounter many new things. when the source of change is going to college, the new things that one is greeted with are multiplied due to the educational nature of the circumstances. the very purpose of college is to introduce new concepts, experiences, people, and ideas. these new encounters can be extremely challenging, forcing people to respond in different ways that they possibly had not considered previously. personally, my first semester at notre dame has been shaped by new encounters and my responses to them. while my new experiences are definitely not unique, i believe that my responses to them have made me a better person in the long run. my encounter with loneliness forced me to respond by giving myself grace, my encounter with a question of what i deserve compelled me to respond with difficult decisions and leaning on my community at notre dame, and my encounters with difficult social pains have made me respond with deep emotion and a hope for the future cultivated by learning from the experiences of others. i have encountered loneliness in my time at notre dame, but have responded with giving myself grace. before college, i valued my time by myself. i cherished my time away from the hustle and bustle of school life and the energy required to spend a lot of time with friends. however, once i got to notre dame, i felt truly lonely for the first time in my life. i had friends on campus, but i felt like i was floundering without the support system of my family close by. this feeling of loneliness was only exacerbated by the expectations i had set for myself in how anderson 2 social i should be. i thought that i needed to be with my friends all of the time, even though that has never been how i have lived my life. however ridiculous this expectation is, it emerged in the face of how the media presents the so-called ideal college experience and the stories my parents had told me about their own time away at school. i thought i was feeling this lonely because there was something wrong with me and my personality. eventually, i recognized that several people felt the same way, as highlighted by emery bergmann in her article “advice from a formerly lonely college student” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). once i realized that i was not as alone as i originally thought, i responded by giving myself some grace and adjusting my expectations for myself. julia hogan’s article in the grotto, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit,” showcases that unhealthy expectations, similar to my own, hinder personal growth (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). if someone is constantly trapped by self-imposed restrictions, there is no way they can truly become the person they are meant to be. i now know, due to my response of grace for myself, there is no reason for me to force myself to be someone i am not in order to fulfill unnecessary expectations. i have also encountered questions of what i believe i deserve, which forced me to respond by making difficult decisions and falling back on my community. i am lucky to have wonderful friends here at notre dame and in my hometown. however, i realized that two people from home were not treating me or our other friends like friends should. they wanted me to be a person that i am not and made fun of me when i did not meet their standards. i let it go for a while, but finally got too much in october. in encountering this question of what i deserve, i realized that, opposed to having unhealthy expectations for my life as described above, it can be https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau anderson 3 good to have expectations of how i should be treated by my friends. i ended up responding by reaching out to my community for their opinions. their listening ears and intelligent input helped me decide definitively how to respond. in ignoring small moments these people treated me in ways i did not deserve, i found that i was attempting to force a community in my friendship with these two people, as described by parker palmer in his “thirteen ways of looking at community.” in finding the gift of community at notre dame, i realized what was missing in my friendships with the two people that hurt me: acceptance of who i am (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). in the end, i ended up asking for space from these people and i feel as though a weight has been lifted off of my chest. while making the decision to cut ties in response to questioning what i deserve was extremely difficult, my community’s assistance has been invaluable. this encounter and my response has taught me to stand up for myself more in future friendships and not to try to force a relationship or community when it is not meant to be. finally, i have also encountered analysis of difficult social pains in my classes at notre dame and responded with deep emotion and hope for the future formed by the experiences of other people. in introduction to peace studies, for example, i have studied war crimes, genocide, marginalization, and the effects of structural violence. when i have encountered these issues, my immediate response is to feel deep pain. there have been multiple times where i was so upset about the things i was learning about that i cried when i got back to my dorm. after my initial response, i attempt to respond with hope from the experiences of others and how they endure hardships. fr. james b. king, c.s.c. highlights how adversity can make people stronger (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). i draw hope from those that have actually lived through and become stronger in the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ anderson 4 adverse circumstances i have learned about in an academic setting. i also respond by looking for good in the way people are able to heal in times of strife, as shown in the art of kintsugi and finding the “beauty in brokenness” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). by increasing the importance of listening to others about their experiences in perseverance, my response to these encounters is defined by hope for the future. even though it is painful to keep working with and on these hard topics, i still treasure those feelings of pain. as long as i feel it, i will be motivated to keep hope in my response, especially when i see the experiences of those who have persevered through painful moments in history. my encounters with loneliness this semester forced a response of grace, my encounter of what i believe i deserve came with a response of hard decisions with community support, and my encounter with painful class materials brought a response of deep emotion and an increased hope for the future. my various experiences and encounters that i have had at notre dame, whether it be feeling isolated, hurt, upset about different atrocities, or more, will continue to force new responses and shape my worldview. the lessons i have learned so far in my encounters and responses will definitely inform the rest of my college experience and my life beyond school. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ moreau integration one me in the making “to believe in something, and not to live it, is dishonest.” mahatma gandhi when we believe something, we communicate that we have confidence in that statement or idea. these beliefs begin to form early in childhood, from bedtime stories and life lessons, from playground feuds and classroom conversations. over time, our beliefs begin to make up who we are, how we treat people, and how we conduct ourselves. to say we hold a belief, and then act in the opposite manner, almost wholly negates this declaration of confidence. over the past two months at notre dame, i have strived to more fully form my beliefs and to live them in my daily life. the moreau first year experience and the relationships i have formed have been essential to this self-discovery. first, i believe that everyone deserves kindness. my oldest sister genna is the kindest person i know; she is gracious, compassionate, loving, and affectionate. she smiles at people who have mistreated her, gives to those who have taken from her, and loves those who do nothing but hate; i can count on one hand the times i have heard her speak a mean word to somebody. genna took care of me for much of my childhood. from her, i learned how much kindness can change someones’ day. i learned about the intrinsic value of a human being and how everyone, no matter how different, deserves kindness. “being nice is free,” she would always say. in my life, she has influenced me to make conversation with the barista at starbucks, to include those that seem uncomfortable in the conversation, and to extend kindness even to those i disagree with. most importantly, i believe we must be kind to those that look, act, or have different cultures from us. no matter how much we might not understand, i believe we must respect the basic humanity of every person by offering a kindhearted and tolerant hand. i feel that implicit bias, discussed in week 7, can largely be combated in daily life by simply treating everyone with the same altruism. second, i believe that everyone belongs somewhere. when i transferred from a private middle school with a class of forty students to a public high school with a class of six hundred and fifty students, i ultimately found where i belonged in the most unexpected of places. for my first year of high school, i tried in vain to form meaningful friendships with the first group of girls i met. we had fun together and talked during lunch, but it was never on the level i desired. the next year, i met a group of people outside the auditorium that eventually became my best friends. somehow, this group was different. somewhere, that was where i belonged. as a result, i believe that belonging is something we can’t necessarily control. if someone is struggling to form friendships, i believe it is not an issue with the person, but simply that they belong elsewhere. a sense of belonging is essential to one’s happiness, peace, and comfort. as such, i try to cultivate a sense of belonging in those around me by being a good friend and sharing meaningful moments with them. as olivia taylor shared, “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting,” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i can help others find where they belong by giving my full attention to anyone i talk to and truly being invested in and focused on the conversation. third, i believe we are meant to serve others. throughout that childhood, i saw my grandparents take friends, acquaintances, and strangers into their house for days at a time. every sunday night dinner seems to bring a new guest, and their retirements have been dedicated to serving others through our local church. since my cousins and i could walk, we have accompanied my grandpa to the homeless shelter downtown every saturday morning, where he spends hours cooking, preparing, serving, and conversing with the less fortunate of los angeles. their constant generosity has shown me that our ultimate purpose in life truly is to help others. at notre dame, our “catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love,” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by kevin grove moreau fye week 5). i truly believe that as a group, our purpose is to give to the less fortunate and somehow leave the earth better than we found it. i hope that this manifests in my career path, where i hope to help those struggling in health through surgery. i know that notre dame will live in us throughout the rest of our lives, and i am excited to see what we all do in the future. fourth, i believe there is strength in vulnerability. there is often an importance placed on “strength,” sometimes seen as acting tough in difficult situations, not letting tears fall when hardships arise, or pushing through every possible circumstance without a complaint. however, i have found in my life that the vulnerability in allowing yourself to feel and show emotion often takes more strength than all of the above. vulnerability is scary. vulnerability is bearing your soul, letting people see the parts of you that might not be so pretty. to me, that is absolutely terrifying; i never want to be a burden or hardship for others or to bring any stress upon their life. further, i don’t want to give up control of others’ images about me. however, i have found that “you have to surrender to something outside yourself to gain strength within yourself.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). to form strong relationships and long-lasting bonds, vulnerability is essential. i first found this to be true with my siblings; when we started being more honest with each other, we became much closer and formed the friendships we have today. the closest friendships i have made at notre dame were born of openness and mutual vulnerability. to be vulnerable is to let others in, giving yourself the possibility of an important connection. the university of notre dame is a place that fosters the development and discovery of the self. throughout my brief time here, i have already learned so much about my relationships with others and with the world. the diversity of experiences in the community of students and faculty at this school has broadened my perspectives and introduced me to so many new cultures and ways of living. i can only hope that the next four years will continue to be as eye-opening and rewarding as these past few months. integration 2 1 sullivan moreau first year experience professor chan am i good enough? am i capable of excelling in the career path that i intend to pursue? questions such as these are presented in the minds of college students daily. i have, in fact, questioned my abilities several times since the beginning of the semester. it is incredibly easy to underestimate yourself when you are swimming in a pool of intelligent fish, metaphorically speaking. especially at the university of notre dame, i have found myself pondering these thoughts and imposing upon a phenomena known as imposter syndrome. simultaneously i have learned so much about myself and about the aspect of community in my first semester as a college student. although i have not encountered instances of discrimination, my knowledge has increased on the subject and i have become more aware of the challenges being faced each day. the community cultivated at notre dame has taught me many things. it has shown me that i am more than i perceive myself to be, that i can learn many things from those who i least expect, and that hatred is a key barrier in the formation of a genuine community. self-doubt is an often common feeling among college students and has entered into my life during my first semester. when applying for colleges, i marked my major down as engineering. as a student in high school, i loved math and science and, therefore, made the general assumption that engineering was the path for me. i did not know anything about the types of engineering disciplines nor did i know the career paths available for environmental engineers specifically. the only thing i knew was that i liked stem and i guess i thought that was enough. however, entering college, the realization that i needed to actually secure a plan and discover my true reason for choosing engineering hit me hard. i felt behind and lost. in my 2 sullivan general physics and calculus classes, the material was not soaking in. i felt, for lack of a better word, stupid most of the time. i made the mistake that most stem people have made and assumed that if i could not accomplish the basic classes, how was i supposed to be an engineer? these thoughts planted themselves in my brain and caused a lot of unneeded anxiety. elizabeth cox discussed these ideas in her ted talk regarding imposter syndrome. cox noted, “you have talent, you are capable, you belong” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). cox’s argument resonated with me, especially considering the thoughts i had been having about my own future. however, i realized that she is right. engineering is not simply a compilation of prerequisite skills and i am capable of pursuing environmental engineering. everyone struggles in the basic classes and i just needed to believe that. after improving my self-confidence and securing my feelings about my future, i began reflecting on the community that i have watched flourish during my time at notre dame. to preface, i truly believe that one person cannot be fully emotionally (or physically) involved in their community if they do not love themselves first. i believe that about one-on-one relationships as well. how can one love another if they do not love themselves? anyway, in gaining proper self-confidence (i.e. reducing the self-doubt), i was able to offer myself fully to my friends and the community that we were cultivating. i feel as though notre dame, for me at least, has provided an incredible environment for developing community. particularly, i want to discuss my newfound relationship with theology as an example of the community i find so endearing at notre dame. before college, i went to a catholic high school and elementary school. one would presume that i was very knowledgeable/devoted to my faith. unfortunately that was not the case. i was very complacent with my faith and my school system did not properly promote genuine relationships with god. additionally, i lacked the maturity to go 3 sullivan beyond the textbook religion and actually seek out a relationship with god on my own terms. at notre dame, however, i have found it extremely difficult to not want that. in my theology class, specifically, i am infatuated with the material we are learning; it is not because i am learning information that is new to me, but rather how it is being discussed and interpreted by my classmates. “and, as in every work of our mission, we find that we ourselves stand to learn much from those whom we are called to teach” (“hope holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week 12). this quote, spoken by fr. james b. king relates to how i see my fellow classmates. my classmates are, in fact, majority non-catholic. because of this, i had a preconceived notion going into the class that we would be covering information for their benefit, not for the students (me) that were catholic. i was wrong again. i learned so much about myself and gained a greater appreciation for my faith through my classmates. the questions they presented were all incredibly insightful and their curiosity/enthusiasm for theology was contagious. i am very grateful for the requirement of theology at notre dame, because it not only renewed my enthusiasm for faith, but it also forced me to think outside of the box and develop my introspective thinking skills. another topic often touched upon in our moreau fye course was the barrier that hatred creates in the formation of a community. fortunately, and i cannot stress this enough, hatred does not appear to be noticeably present at notre dame. the people that i have crossed paths with have all been genuine and i have not met a single person or participated in an activity in which i could positively say that i hated. in my opinion, it is rather easy to hate someone, especially if their beliefs do not align with mine or i am feeling too stubborn to resolve the issue. this is not the greatest mindset to have and i have been taught this throughout the moreau course. fr. jenkins mentioned in his commencement address, “hatred is more dangerous to us than any 4 sullivan other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address'' by fr. john jenkins c.s.c moreau fye week ten). in high school, there was a person in my friend group that i did not necessarily have the greatest relationship with. i found myself often turning to my other friends to rant/gossip about this person. i believed in my heart that i genuinely hated her. as one would expect, this rocky relationship affected the group as whole. my friends were put into a horrible position; they needed (at least what we thought back then) to choose one of us to invite to each ‘get together’. looking back, i regret the unwanted drama that i brought upon our friend group and i can happily say that i have grown exponentially from my young teenage years. the quote i previously mentioned relates to this scenario. the hatred that my (now friend) and i felt for each other affected the community that we had with our friend group. moreover, i learned a different connection of hatred and community over the course of this semester. what i had never realized was the fact that a true community includes those who we think we hate. a community is built on trust, strength, and love and even if everyone within your community is not your best friend, they still must be included. parker j. palmer once said, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this attitude toward community has gone over my head in the past and is a new realization for me. although i have not dealt with acquiring any enemies since my time at notre dame, i hope that if i ever come across a person that i do not entirely agree with, i will remember this point and work on embracing them as a part of this amazing community. my experiences in high school shaped me into the person i entered into college as, but my experiences at notre dame have begun the molding process of who i aspire to become. i am 5 sullivan constantly being challenged to be the greatest version of myself possible and push myself academically and personally. i have rendered the true meaning of community and can now acknowledge that hatred is not a concept i can allow myself to entertain. however, as much as i feel i have grown in the past few months, i know that it is only the beginning. being at notre dame has helped me so much and i am genuinely excited for what the future holds, in the next three and a half years and beyond. integration iii patrick mckenzie moreau first year experience integration iii 3/4/22 the eulogy of patrick joseph mckenzie patrick joseph mckenzie was a good man. sometimes it's best to leave it like that. he was a good man. a man of courage and empathy. a man of stubbornness and resilience. a man of character and integrity. admiral byrd once said, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). patrick was a simple man. he was bothered by little and lived with improvisation and diligence. he made the very best of what he had and kept his imagination open like a child’s. patrick found joy in the simple things: building, creating, pursuing and questioning knowledge, constructing friendships, and treating everyone with integrity and tenderness. patrick found joy in building with legos because he understood they could be broken down and rebuilt over and over and over again with endless possibilities. he built from his heart. he knew one idea was not final. anything could be taken apart and rebuilt. the same goes for people. patrick saw ways to build people up (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). he was not interested in tearing things down or knocking people down. patrick sought out ways to make others better people. pope francis acknowledged, “life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). patrick was one who could get along with anyone. he allowed himself to be vulnerable. vulnerability is not a weakness. vulnerability leads to the https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript “concrete language of love” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) which patrick demonstrated day in and day out. father himes states, “joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to extend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before” (“three key questions” by michael himes moreau fye week three). patrick pushed himself to find joy in whatever task he was accomplishing. to him, a task was no task at all. it was an opportunity to expand his abilities and discover something new. patrick applied himself with an open heart and mind. he smiled through tough work and he smiled through the fun work. he smiled because he understood he could make others smile. patrick was a “lighthouse and the crossroads” (“hesburgh” by jerry barc and christien o’malley moreau fye week two) because he was never defined by one action. he traversed a path in which he strived to do his best at everything he did. he was stubborn with his values, understanding of his interests, and practical with his skills (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). he valued structure over beauty and took personal responsibility in his own creations (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). patrick was a man who spread kindness through his actions and felt a responsibility to end “the opposite of kindness” (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). with a relentless spirit, patrick was indestructible. physical wounds only left him with a smile and his self-discipline kept his mind keen. he was described as “willing to stick his face in the spokes of a bike wheel to stop it from spinning”. he stumbled but never fell. he would bend, but not break. his character was rooted in a solid foundation that never waivered. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056?module_item_id=144382 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit patrick was a consistent man of value. he did his work day in and day out. he let his morals guide him and he valued you as the person you are. his circle was tight-knit, yet his impact rippled to those who knew him. his integrity was at the forefront of every action, discussion, and interaction he had and he demonstrated the utmost respect for everyone. patrick let his values guide his daily life (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). patrick greeted you with a smile and wave. he shook your hand firmly and looked you in the eye. patrick always showed up early and respected your time. he always asked what he could do for you. he was one to ask what to be proactive about a situation and does not resort to asking why something happened (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). he was concerned about the future; how to plan, educate, and prepare. patrick was not discouraged by the things he did not know how to do, for he observed the strategy of others and asked questions to gain meaningful insight (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). as we reflect back upon and celebrate the life of patrick joseph mckenzie, we realize we have witnessed a life lived to the fullest. he would not tell you that however because he was too focused on being in the moment. patrick forged relationships, built people up, and let his values construct his destiny. he was a gentle giant. a man of good character and good integrity. he discovered his purpose and exercised his values in a consistent, everyday manner. patrick understood how to slow down life and find joy in the darkest of days. he was a steady man, one who did not show great emotion, never too low and never too high. with a smile and wave, his greeting went a long way to whomever he passed by. patrick was never afraid to speak the truth; even if it was something you did not want to hear (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). patrick was an intellectual. he always wanted to learn more, formulate https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit hypotheses, and did not waste his time in unnecessary social settings. patrick touched the hearts of every human being he encountered. he is an inspiration to us all. patrick showed us how to demand the best of ourselves. he showed us how to demand the most out of each other. he showed us how to get the most out of life. in his humble spirit, patrick would just want us to say one thing: he was a good man. fys integration 2 professor pruitt integration 2 28 november 2021 growing in community through my first semester here at notre dame i have encountered a difficult academic environment as well as a new and welcoming community. using lessons i have learned in moreau as well as my own experiences, i have responded to this challenge and surprise through learning to be confident in my abilities as well as embracing the notre dame community. the first true struggle i encountered while here at notre dame was the academics. like many students here, in high school i worked hard to have so-called “perfect” grades and a lot of involvement. i worked hard, but school was always my strong suit andi was used to having good grades and striving for perfection. however, when i began classes at notre dame i realized the caliber of students with whom i was surrounded and the difficulty of the courses offered here. at first, my inability to perform at the level i could in high school took a toll on me. it was an obstacle i had not encountered before, and at times i felt unequipped to handle it. my fear that i would let down my parents and myself made me doubt if i would be able to succeed here. however, i have learned to respond to this challenge by taking the pressure off of myself to always be perfect. as we discussed during week 9, “we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) this realization was crucial to my growth here at college. it is an accomplishment in and of itself that i am able to go to school here and rather than see the classes and my peers as strictly challenges and obstacles i can turn them into opportunities. i can learn so much from the skill of my classmates and professors. looking at my education as an opportunity has allowed me to https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau forgive myself when i make mistakes and use college as a time of growth. this time has also provided me with an opportunity to grow in my faith through trusting in god’s plan for me and my own abilities to keep up with the work. i have also recognized the importance of hope as a part of my everyday life. as we discussed in week 12 in moreau, hope allows us to understand that things will get better in the future as well as forgive ourselves when things don’t always go as planned. when i have not done as well as i had hoped on an exam, i am able to continue to live in the hope that everything will work out the way it is supposed to. “we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next.” (holy cross and christian education by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). as the quote explains, i have learned that responding to struggles in a hopeful manner will be crucial to my success here. despite the academic struggle i have encountered, what has been so much more impactful is the incredible community i have encountered here at notre dame. throughout my whole life i have been immersed in a tight-knit community from school to my home life. i attended a k-12 school with my graduating class containing 60 students and am the oldest of five children. my school was truly a community and i became extremely close with not only the kids in my grade, but most people in the school. attending the same school for my entire grade school and high school meant that the community i belonged to remained the same for my whole life. before coming to notre dame i had never really had to find a new community, it felt as if everything was “built-in” for me at home. coming to notre dame i was very excited to join the community that i had heard so many positive things about, but was also nervous because everything would be new and different from home. however, what i found here was better than i could ever imagine. i found myself surrounded by students, staff, and professors that genuinely cared about me and worked toward my best interest. i think the quote, “my concept of community must be capacious enough to embrace everything from my relation to strangers i will https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190606?module_item_id=107411 never meet), to people with whom i share local resources and must learn to get along, to people i am related to for the purpose of getting a job done.” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) sums up what i have learned here at notre dame. i have been able to join a community where i do not know everyone as well as i did back home, but can still play an important role and look out for everyone. furthermore, within the large notre dame community i have been able to find smaller communities within my dorm, clubs, and close friends. i have learned to respond to this positive change in community by completely immersing myself in it. by doing this i have met people i would not have otherwise, made close friendships, and have constantly felt welcome and accepted. while i have had such a positive experience so far in the notre dame community; i know that it is inevitable that at one point i will encounter people who may disagree with me or are completely different from me. it is important that i respond to these differences with love because as we discussed in week 10, “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action.” (wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. john jenkins c.s.c moreau fye week ten). it is important that i surround myself with people who are different from me because i know that i can learn alot from them; but at the same time prevent the differences from altering relationships with others and the community built here by working through them together. reflecting on the time i have spent here at notre dame, i have encountered struggles as well as an incredibly supportive community. i have learned to be grateful for the opportunities i have here and respond to challenges in a positive way as well as embrace the notre dame community. i am confident that this mindset will set me up for success here in college. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ moreau intregation two finding myself through my notre dame journey as my first semester at notre dame comes to a close, i’ve done much reflection upon my experience here so far, as well as upon my life as a whole. through the readings and qqcs that i’ve completed for moreau, i’ve allowed myself to take a step back from the stress of life and other classes, and focus more on how i can become the best version of myself. in this process and attempt to be the best me i can be, i’ve found that i’ve become more compassionate and open minded to many of the new and unique experiences that i’ve encountered at notre dame thus far. though never easy, i have begun to realize that the expectations and goals that i set for myself and whether or not i achieve them, while motivating, cannot and do not define me. i struggled with this for a long time in high school as i worried about the college application process and how i would react to potentially being denied from prestigious schools like notre dame, northwestern, and michigan. while i do know that there is no problem with setting difficult goals for myself, it was the expectation that i must achieve them that hurt me the most. despite the fact that i knew that the admissions process was both extremely difficult and competitive, with how much work i put into doing well in school and extracurriculars, i almost expected to get into these top ranked universities. as hogan stated in her article, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). reading this text and understanding this distinction was extremely important to me. it helped me to understand that goals themselves are absolutely a good and positive thing, but that the expectation that comes with them is what leads us to disappointment. since then, i have continued to be ambitious and set goals for myself, but have attempted to do so without the expectation and pressure that i would’ve put on myself prior. i have found that one of the biggest challenges i have faced since being here at notre dame is how i have strived to be the best member of our campus community i can be. though i have not been here for long, i’ve come to realize that just about everyone i have met here has been kind and loving. as a result, i have done my best to continue to spread and show this same https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ care and love towards others. i believe that this itself is the biggest challenge we face in our community here, attempting to uphold the incredible respect and compassion that so many people here show to one another. i feel that this also relates to devron’s article debating whether or not schools should teach critical race theory. as devron states, “the conflict between those who favor solutions from critical race theory versus those who prefer a common humanity approach has followed a predictable pattern of polarization. it mirrors the secular political discourse of the day, pitting cultural conservatives and progressives against each other.” ("should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week 10) in today’s political climate, i’ve noticed that many people have started to view others not as the human beings they are, but instead as members of a party supporting an agenda. these views, however, are extremely divisive and as a new student in this new community, i’ve placed this challenge on myself to remove external and internal bias. as a result, i’ve become much more open minded and eager to put myself into unique, new, and even uncomfortable situations, knowing that it is from these where i will experience the most growth. it’s easy for me to get along and form connections with people who are similar to me. in high school, this was very simple. we all lived in the same town and knew one another, many from even before coming to school together. here at notre dame, however, i was put into a totally new community, surrounded by totally new classmates and professors. it was once i arrived at this incredible university that i began to truly challenge myself to strengthen the bonds with everyone around me, regardless of our backgrounds or even whether or not we had shared interests. as palmer stated in the week 11 text, “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives.” ( "thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11) this quote means a lot to me and represents college communities very well. while it is true that many of the people that i live with are my closest friends, there certainly are some that i’d rather not be living with. however, rather than being annoyed by this, i have instead challenged myself to embrace it. in this process i have tightened bonds with others around me and i feel as though i have made a positive contribution to the notre dame community. https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ every day, but particularly throughout my time here at notre dame, as a student and part of a community and mission much bigger than myself, i have strived to be the best version of myself that i can be every day. as father king wrote, “moreau believed that life was essentially a personal, daily struggle for union with god in which the christian modeled himself after the son’s example of fidelity. while none of us can be so perfect, the aim for the christian was twofold: to reach one’s fullest potential in this world while remaining focused upon the ultimate goal of fullness in the life to come.” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king c.s.c. moreau fye week 12) as i attempt to give everything i can to this extraordinary notre dame community, i have started to find a better balance in my life; a balance that, for a long time, i struggled to find and maintain. this balance is between my search for self-growth and the maintenance of healthy relationships with those around me, all while striving to achieve my academic goals. in doing so, i know that i will not only make important contributions to our notre dame community, but continue my journey of self-growth as i strive to discover more and more about myself every day. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration one 12 october 2021 integration one: the effects notre dame has had on my root beliefs when growing up, i was always taught specific things that helped to space my root beliefs. although my root beliefs might have been changed a little throughout my childhood and my life, they essentially stayed consistent throughout the years, but that was until i came to notre dame and started school here. being at notre dame and simply learning within this community has caused me to reflect and alter my root beliefs more than ever throughout my life. while they still haven’t changed majorly, they changed more than they would have in the past. i believe that the people that a person chooses to surround themselves will reflect upon how they view themselves and their lives. i believe that the people that i surround myself with are the people that lift me up when i need them and help me feel as if i can do and be whatever i want. in the past, i had been in a toxic relationship for the majority of my life, all the way from when i was two years old until i was 14, with my best friend. my beliefs surrounding friendship and relationships had always been that, to me, the people i know are nice and the right kind of people, but i never truly went deeper than what they were showing on the surface. but, now i have learned the lesson to always look deeper into the people i choose to surround myself with and call my friends because i never want to go through the pain of another toxic relationship. from week 4 of moreau, i truly learned the signs of a toxic relationship, and it helped to further alter my beliefs about who i surround myself with. the article "five signs you're in a toxic friendship" explains that being in a toxic friendship is like feeling "both accepted and rejected by someone with whom you want to be friends. feeling both good and bad about a friend, however, is the first sign of a toxic friendship" ("five signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). this really stuck with me and reminded me of my past relationship because it was how i always felt. when i was around the girl i called my best friend, i never felt good and truly happy. i always felt that i had to conform to what she said and what she wanted to do because, in the back of my mind, i was scared to lose my longest and pretty much only friend at the time. after finally getting out of that toxic relationship, i had really started to change my beliefs about the people i surrounded myself with, and not just friends but also simply within my community. regardless of my one bad experience, i was lucky enough to grow up in such a tight-knit community in which people love and support you regardless. the time that really opened my eyes about how blessed i was due to my community was during week 6, when we wrote the "where i'm from" poems. in the example, "where i'm from" by george ella lyon, he wrote his poem about the physical aspects of his community around him, so i wanted to do something similar, but instead of the physical elements, i chose to talk about the people. ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). within my poem, i explained the community and the people https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html that surrounded me as a town that goes out of its way to help others around them, which loves to throw events that benefit others going through a rough time. being surrounded by such a positive and loving community helped shape my belief that the people around a person can influence the person they become and their values within life. i believe that i am constantly searching for what i want in life and who i want to become in life. i believe that no one person knows who they are early in life and keeps that same idea of themselves for their whole life. our views on the world, especially on the type of person we are and want to be, are constantly changing due to the influences around us and the new information we learn. within week 3, we learned about making a framework for our lives and what we truly want within life, and what we want to accomplish and become. in the video from father mccormick, he uses the analogy of three steps of tying shoes compared to creating a framework. his steps are (1) be patient, (2) know that each “knot” or situation is different and to always look at it with fresh eyes, and (3) to be hopeful and keep believing that you are almost there (“student reflections on faith” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). from learning about these steps to getting through life and making decisions, i started to reflect on my own life and my own framework. i noticed that i don’t specifically have a concrete framework for getting through life and becoming the best person. so, when i saw this, i started to create my own framework from everything i started to learn within moreau and simply from being at notre dame. a key aspect of my framework is that i want to be a person who helps other people and is compassionate and kind. from week 2, we learned about two parts of a person, adam i and adam ii. within the video, it explains that adam ii is “hears a calling and obeys the world” and “savors inner consistency and strength” and finally, its “motto is love, redemption and return’” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). from learning about creating a framework and the values of being “adam ii,” i started to make it my goal to be more of a compassionate and kindhearted person towards others and toward the world. my beliefs about my life had changed dramatically simply from starting at notre dame, and it has helped open my eyes to the value of continuous learning and changing my beliefs, regardless of what they are about. so, i plan to have and live by my framework now, but always leave my mind open to the new experiences and things that i learn along the way that might alter my framework. i believe that the most powerful aspect that makes me and makes people who they are is simply through what they have experienced. within just the short amount of time i’ve been alive and actually remember everything, i have always valued the experiences and new things that i have been introduced to within my life. i have never gone to a new place without having the goal of learning something new about the people i am meeting and even about myself. i think it is essential that people value their experiences and the experiences of others when creating their beliefs and views on specific subjects. in the video “danger of a single story,” chimamanda ngozi adichie explains her own experiences of only being https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim taught and surrounded by one thing and how it influenced her views on her life and the lives of others. she explains that “because all i had read were books in which characters were foreign, i had become convinced that books by their very nature had to have foreigners in them and had to be about things with which i could not personally identify” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). ngozi explains that she didn’t experience much when she was younger, leading her to make many generalizations and assumptions about literature and sometimes about her places. because of this, ngozi’s story just helped to reinforce my belief that is learning everything a person can about another and need to experience these new things to fully understand them. another aspect of moreau that really helped support my belief about the power of experiences on a person was during week 7 when reading the letters that father sorin wrote to bl. basil moreau. within these letters, father sorin tells his story of traveling to south bend and creating notre dame. he explains his difficult journey and how he felt when first seeing the environment: “everything was frozen, and yet it all appeared so beautiful.” he saw them as symbols of the “stainless purity of our august lady” and the “purity of soul which should characterize the new inhabitants” (“letters to father general moreau” by father sorin moreau fye week 5). reading about father sorin’s new experiences and how he turned the negative aspects into positive ones helped show me that it doesn’t matter what the experiences are that a person encounters, but instead what that person takes away from those experiences. father sorin and ngozi could have let their negative experiences affect them and their lives, but rather, they chose to see it as positive and as a promise of further learning and further hope for better things to come. learning all of this and talking about it in class not just reinforced my root value that experiences are one of the most powerful things that influence who a person is, but it also helps alter my belief by introducing that no matter what the experience involves and is about, the person must always see it in a positive and hopeful way to fully gain from it. i believe that vulnerability is a powerful thing. while i used to believe that it is something to be hidden for others and locked away within oneself, i now believe that the only way to be one’s true self is to embrace your vulnerability. i used to have such a negative view of vulnerability; it was something that others would only judge me on and something that would ostracize me from the others around me. but by coming to notre dame and being introduced to the moreau class and objective has opened my eyes to the power of vulnerability and how it can only help people grow instead of holding them back. in the first week, we watched the video “power of vulnerability” in which professor brené brown explains the aspects of vulnerability and how by people embracing their vulnerability, they will be “whole-hearted people” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this video changed my beliefs about vulnerability and turned them from a negative view to a positive view. it helped me learn that embracing vulnerability is the one true way that i and others can become our true selves. because by https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-89156 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be hiding my vulnerability from others, it means that i am hiding a part of myself from others, leading them to not see and get to know my true and authentic self. also, moreau has helped to open my eyes to the benefits of being vulnerable simply by using the exercise of a person per week sharing their life story. everyone is willing to be vulnerable in front of the class every week by telling their life story and reflecting on their past, and the things they learned have helped me understand how powerful being vulnerable can be when growing as a person. many people in class talked about the times when they struggled the most within life and how they overcame that period and became better people. for example, mike explained that almost losing the ability to walk for the rest of his life allowed him to reflect on the type of person he was and the type of people that he surrounded himself with. mike was vulnerable and open to the class when explaining that when he looks back on the kind of person he was, he doesn’t like what he sees and is embarrassed and ashamed of the person he used to be. learning about mike and many of my other classmates’ stories and vulnerabilities has slowly helped me embrace mine more and open up a little more than i would have in the past. because of this, my plans and goals for the future are to simply start to embrace my vulnerabilities and try not to hide them from others around me simply because of the fear of rejection or embarrassment. moreau integration one joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 15 october 2021 how my core beliefs play a factor in my experience at notre dame coming into notre dame, i didn’t know what to expect since i was the first one in my family to attend college. i always heard about how notre dame students were “a force of good” in the world, but i never completely understood it (video: “two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grovemoreau reflection week 5). i entered believing that i had to receive good grades and be on top of my work to succeed in life. however, after coming here, i realized that i had a difficult time adjusting to the shift in the workload and realizing that sometimes things don’t always go according to plan. the first week in, i discovered that i wanted to pursue another field and proceeded to change my major. ( moreau fye reflection commentaryweek 2). i told myself that it was fine to change my major since i believe that i grow by challenging myself while pursuing my interests. as father pete said, “father pete said, “the greatest journey is the one of self-discovery.” (video: “the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormickmoreau fye reflection week 3). throughout these 7 weeks in moreau, i was able to reflect on certain things about myself and others that i didn’t think about before. ever since i changed my major, i felt that i was slipping into an endless void of time. i wasn’t taking care of my health, and i wasn’t where i needed to be. this experience would have been easier if i opened up to my professors and friends sooner. all of my life, i had a difficult time being vulnerable because it felt like a weakness (moreau fye reflection commentary week 1). at home, i never felt comfortable being vulnerable because i was afraid that i would be judged by my family. when i was feeling extremely stressed, i felt like i had a hard time being vulnerable because i was new to this environment, and i felt that no one would understand. joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 15 october 2021 however, by going through these hardships, i learned to prioritize my health and reach out to others when i need it. therefore, i now know that the notre dame faculty as well as my classmates are there to help me whenever i am struggling or when i just need someone to talk to. the notre dame experience would be incomplete without the faith aspect. as someone who grew up in a catholic household, faith was always an important part of who i was. therefore, i believe that having faith in god or just having faith in other people helps build overall character. going to mass every sunday or just praying every night was a part of the context of where i’m from. being asian and catholic has always been a part of who i am, so i’ve learned to appreciate everything i have, even the opportunity to attend this institution (fye reflection poemweek 6). since i never attended a catholic school before, i thought that it would be an exciting and different experience. in addition, i wanted to “cultivate the mind and heart.” (fye reflection commentaryweek 3). i believed that i would gain something from this experience. on that same note, “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love.” (video: “two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father pete mccormickmoreau fye reflection week 5). father sorin founded notre dame because he envisioned that it would be a college where it “would be a force for good.” (text: fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, fye reflection week 5). thanks to all the support i received throughout my life, i’ve learned how to build better relationships with those around me. therefore, i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by listening to and respecting other people around me. growing up, i witnessed the exact opposite of a life-giving relationship in my own household. my parents https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 15 october 2021 would argue all of the time, and it was extremely hard for me to witness that as a child ( moreau fye reflection commentaryweek 4). in a way, this made me want to avoid making the effort to build relationships at all. however, i learned that not all relationships are negative and that i should work to improve the relationships i have and will make in the future. on that same note, in terms of being a student at notre dame, i believe that we all have a responsibility to protect one another if we ever see incidences of another student being in potential danger. ("it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" moreau fye reflection week 4 ). i also believe that being part of a community means looking out for one another throughout the ups and downs. as in most relationships, there is an aspect of truth that we hope to attain. personally, i believe that truth can be pursued through clarification or by knowing without assuming anything about others. for example, in the “danger of a single story,” chimamanda made a good point about how a single story is not exactly incorrect, but incomplete. many times, it’s so easy to assume something about someone overall when they’ve only heard one particular story related to them. (“video: “danger of a single story” (chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted) fye reflection commentary week 7). in many ways, i have been a victim of the “single story” because some of the kids in school would assume that i was a “chino” or made generalizations about me because i “was asian.” (fye reflectionweek 7). thus, this was very inaccurate because they most likely were basing it off a single story/encounter with another asian who happened to be smart. from this, i learned that i shouldn’t assume things about others and that we can clear up those misconceptions by informing others as well. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105570 joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 15 october 2021 on a similar note, these implicit biases may arise because everyone on campus is so different from one another. i believe that we all have different strengths and weaknesses, and we use them in a way that benefits us. for me, my strengths seem to be a love of learning and teamwork ( via character strengths surveyfye reflection week 2). we can use our strengths to become either like adam 1 or adam 2. while adam 1 aims to be ambitious, and create innovation. on the other hand, adam 2 is the side that aims to make a positive difference in society. i believe that we should strive to be a good mix of both, and finding that balance is important, but it’s also beneficial to focus on what is important so that we don’t lose focus (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooksfyec reflection week 2). therefore, i aim to be a good mix of both but there are certain situations where i have to be one more than the other. in the final analysis, i believe that all the beliefs that i stated here will help me grow as a person throughout the rest of my life. i know that some of my beliefs may be changed over time, but they will not stray much away from my core morals and who i am as a person. https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim joanna nguyen-tran moreau professor reaume 15 october 2021 integration two bryan reaume moreau first-year experience 3 december 2021 love thee, freshman year when asking a freshman how their first semester of college was, you may receive a large range of responses; “it was the happiest i’ve ever been”, “it was the lowest point in my life”, “i’ve never felt so happy, yet confused and lonely.” these are just the basic answers one may have when attempting to explain the varying emotions they have felt as a first-year. nevertheless, what i have come to realize is that it is precisely these experiences and how we respond to the issues we face which allow us to grow as individuals. throughout the moreau first-year experience course, i have been able to assess my values and beliefs while investigating the different life experiences and perspectives people have. most importantly, i learned about how i will approach and respond to all i have encountered not only through my first semester of college, but my life as a whole. over the course of my first few months here, something i have personally struggled with is a concept known as imposter syndrome. essentially, sometimes i will get really frustrated with myself when i make simple mistakes or am confused on a topic and begin to question myself and my abilities. furthermore, i will then go on to compare myself to other people. this is something that i have always struggled with, but it has only gotten worse in college. however, during week nine of the moreau course, i was able to delve deeper into the topic, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau moreau fye week nine). hogan’s explanation here really resonated with me because it allowed me to view a situation from a whole different perspective. it allowed me to realize that living life for quality according to myself and my values is far more essential than living according to society’s expectations about what should be best for me. thus, when i doubt myself and experience this imposter syndrome, it is important for me to take a step back and look at it in the grand scheme of things. i must look deeply into myself and act based on what i actually want for myself rather than basing it off on other people. rather than doubting myself or questioning my abilities because i am not performing up to another person’s standards, i will be satisfied with my results as long as i put in all the effort i could have. because in the end, that is what truly matters to me, and what allows me to live the life i want. moreover, another opportunity the university of notre dame has provided me with is a wide range of students, all from different backgrounds and perspectives. as a result, i have been able to have very productive and respectful conversations about certain global issues with people i have both agreed and disagreed with. this has allowed me to see the importance of these conversations and how i can carry out these ideas into the world once i graduate. during week ten of this course, i learned about the different levels of brokenness in different communities, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by father john jenkins moreau fye ten). this speech connected with me quite deeply because it is something that i have always been concerned about, yet interested in. learning more about this concept which father jenkins discusses was crucial because it allows me to carry this knowledge into conversations with my peers for the rest of my life. oftentimes people can become very passionate about their respective sides, thus leading to this “scorn” which father jenkins is referring to. thus, it is up to me to approach these https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ conversations with respect and cordiality. after all, hatred gets us nowhere. having thoughtful, insightful conversations is far more meaningful because it can actually have a positive effect on the world. furthermore, one core belief that the university has adopted which i have learned to value myself is the concept of community. whether it is a small lab group or my entire residence hall, i have begun to also embrace having a strong, close-knit community. in doing this, i have learned to love and accept all of the people within these communities, even if they were someone who i may not normally be close with. during week eleven, i learned about how i may encounter the different forms of community, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy,’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau week eleven). while i do not necessarily have any “enemies” within my community, there are people who i have had to embrace even though i probably wouldn’t be close with them otherwise. nonetheless, i still feel that this quote is quite important because it is something that our community deeply struggles with today. overall, i now understand how important it is that i embrace everyone and accept them into my community, so that way we can create a less hateful society that works to create a more interconnected, progressive group of individuals. during my time here at notre dame, one element that has become a larger part of my life than it previously was is spirituality. not being a very religious person, the faith atmosphere of the college was the only value i was rather unsure about. however, i will say that as i have taken a closer look at religion through my theology class and visits to the grotto, i have become more and more intrigued by what faith has to offer. in fact, i have found myself living for a greater purpose than myself or even the loved ones around me. week twelve additionally played a part in allowing me to investigate what a faith-based education has to offer, “an education of mind http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ and heart means to enkindle within students a burning desire to act boldly, like the original disciples afire with the holy spirit on pentecost who set out to preach the good news to all the world,” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week twelve). this quote had quite an impact on me because it draws a valuable connection between basic human concepts as well as a more complex, powerful notion of god and the meaning of life. i was able to become more aware of the holy cross education and how one can unlock both great knowledge and a strong type of passion and zeal through god. i now know that religion does not have to be this scary, overbearing concept. rather, i can utilize it to have a greater impact on my own life as well as the lives of those around me. for me, if someone asks how my first semester of college was, i will most likely just give them a simple “great.” what they will not know is the true magnitude of this simple answer. they probably won’t understand how much i mean it. they probably might think to themselves, “just great? that’s it?” when they will realize how great it truly was, however, is when i tell them all of the wonderful people i have met and the life lessons i have learned. the fact of the matter is, “great” is the only word that i can think of when describing my experience here, and that’s because it truly is a great place. it is the only word i could use because there frankly is not a word valuable enough to explain to people all i have encountered and all i have been taught. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ 14 october 2021 a force for good throughout my short time here at the university of notre dame, i have put considerable thought into what my future will look like. as i ponder this question, i also wonder towards what purpose should i orient my life. as i think about my purpose, i have come to believe that i have a responsibility to promote the welfare of others. a responsibility not only to my immediate friends and acquaintances but to the larger human community as well. i believe that this responsibility stems from our shared humanity and that we have an obligation to learn more about each other. i also believe that the only way which we can truly learn about each other is if we are truly vulnerable and open to our weaknesses and strengths. i believe that through all these things, we can make the world a better place. i believe that we have an obligation to be open and honest with each other to help build upon a shared humanity. this is not necessarily an easy task, as it often requires us to b courageous and take a step back and take an honest survey of our strengths and weaknesses. dr. renee brown touches upon this courage in her ted talk. “courage, the initial definition of courage when it first came into the english language -it’s from the latin word cor, meaning heartand the original definition was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). when i examined my own strengths and weaknesses using the via character strengths survey, i found that one of my weakest traits was love. the survey defines love as “valuing close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing & caring are reciprocated; being close to people” (“via character strengths survey” by via institute on character moreau fye week 2). by being vulnerable and willing to take an honest look at myself i learned that i need to improve in building relations with others so i can truly become more vulnerable. i believe that we are called to love one another to build a greater shared humanity. jesus’s commandment of love helps us to not only grow closer to each other but also grow closer to him. as. fr. kevin grove said, “we cannot love the god whom we cannot see if we don’t love the brother whom we do see” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove – moreau fye week 5. despite the importance of love, some people attempt to corrupt this love to exploit it for their own gain. throughout my time here at notre dame, i have unfortunately heard horror stories of abusive relationships. this idea is expanded upon in the video “because i love you, double whiskey.” one particularly powerful quote from the video is “because i love you, you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation – moreau fye week 4). this problem of abusive relationships is only exacerbated when alcohol and other drugs are added to the mix. i hope to make smart decisions while here at notre dame so that no one feels disrespected or unsafe. many people paint the feeling of disrespect in a relationship as a rite of passage, but it represents a dangerous lack of love for the other person. if these toxic relationships continue, they pose a serious risk for the safety and wellbeing of the victim involved. i believe that our obligation of love continues far beyond our immediate relationships and interactions. we have a duty to be welcoming and friendly to all people, regardless of their ethnic, racial, cultural, or sexual background. this can be a challenge because of our own implicit biases and subconscious assumptions. personally, we all must work to counteract these biases and open ourselves https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g up to truly getting to know the entire human community. unfortunately, people often attempt to write the story of another based upon their assumptions and biases. this represents a dangerous power dynamic between the one who dictates and the one who is dictated. while at notre dame, i have seen people be stereotyped simply because they are from a certain place or because they act a certain way. chimamanda adichie provides her experience with other people writing her story in her ted talk. she says, “power is the ability not to just tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie – moreau fye week 7). the idea of writing the definitive story of another person is dangerous because it can often overwrite the individual visions, beliefs, passions, and destinies for other people. i will work to control my own implicit biases and to not stereotype people based on my immediate perceptions of them. stereotypes represent a dangerous way of preventing someone from telling their own story. therefore, we must be willing to listen to them tell their own stories so that we can gain an honest sense of how they see themselves and what their vision of the world is. i believe that we all share a common mission to make the world a better place. as father sorin said, “this university has the opportunity to be one of the most powerful forces for doing good in the country.” i have taken this idea to heart as i look forward. while here at notre dame i hope to refine my vision for how i can be a force for good in this world. this fundamentally involves working to help benefit the lives of men and women all over the world. as fr. pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick – moreau fye week 3). while here at notre dame i hope to discover how i can help to live out my vision of helping the world, but also come to develop a deeper appreciation for my fellow man. after all, we are all from a shared humanity, and it is essential to who we all are. our backgrounds and influences play a tremendous role in who we are. i concluded my poem for week 6 with the lines “this is where i’m from, / who i’m from” (“where i’m from” by – moreau fye week 6). by reflecting upon where we come from, as well as who we come from, we can best learn how we can give back to the broader human community and make the world a better place. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28314/assignments/30679?module_item_id=105663 week 8 qqc using my past to shape my future i am searching for the roots of my history in a society of cultural genocide and the destruction of history. in "danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie (moreau fyi week 7), chimamanda ngozi adichie discusses how dangerous the e�ect of a single predominant narrative can be. the single narrative is often constructed by the majority, which in this case are middle-aged, upper-class, white men. due to this majority also being the ones in power this allows the spread of misleading and often life-threatening narratives to spread about minorities and people of color. in addition to that, this leads to the eradication of history and the reconstruction of what is known as the truth. this is why it is essential to seek out what is the truth. personally, i thought i knew everything there was to know about african american history. however, the pandemic opened my eyes to a lot more of the su�ering of my people than i had imagined before and made me realize what darkness i was living in. this is what started my hunt for the truth. i believe this avid hunt for the truth is ingrained in every aspect of my life beyond just finding out about my history and has founded my curiosity for what the world has to o�er. a lot of this curiosity about my history as an african american majorly comes from my desire to know where i am from. in georgia ella lyon’s poem “where i’m from” (moreau week 6), she discusses the untold stories of her life that make her who she is, in turn, demonstrating how where she’s from makes her memories and essentially her. being black has always been the core of my identity. having grown up in an impoverished urban community, i know what it is like to feel like a stereotype. i grew up in conditions and elements that some people could not even imagine and that has been and always will be a core function of my being. i believe i am still searching for who exactly i am in a society of artificial standards and prejudice, but, the life i lived to get to the moment i am at right now is a fundamental piece of who i am and who i am going to be in the future. these stories have shaped who i am, both the positive aspects ingrained into my personality as well as the negative. while my upbringing has taught me how to be resilient and determined with my goals and aspirations, many of the shortcomings of my personality stem from how and where i grew up. it has taken a lot of self-reflection for me to accept that i put guards up against those who love and care for me, unwilling to be vulnerable, due to a series of challenging situations i faced as an adolescent and preteen. however, as i have gotten older my new relationships, paired with a little bit of therapy, allowed https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story me to grasp the true concept of vulnerability, much like described in "the power of vulnerability" by (brené brown, tedxhouston) (moreau week 1). in this speech, brown goes on to say “vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness but it also appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, love…” when i was younger, i would have sco�ed at such a claim. however, even though i still have much more self-reflection to undertake as a young adult, i believe that even though society paints vulnerability as a weakness, allowing yourself to be vulnerable helps you grow as a person, not just in your own social circle, but in society as a whole, as being vulnerable is learning to accept yourself and all your shortcomings. shortcomings like this include analyzing those around me, as surrounding myself with people who do not actually love me is a form of self-hate. it can be hard to scrutinize the people around you that you care for, especially when they have become a foundation of love in your heart and mind. but much like in the video "because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation (moreau week 4), love can be blinding to the toxic and detrimental traits of a person in your life that you care for displays. while this is more often than not publicized within romantic relationships, the same applies to friendships and business relationships. i believe that in order to love yourself, you have to build around yourself a circle of genuine love, even if it is just you in it. i believe that every aspect of your life is ingrained with the component of love and in order to experience it to its fullest extent, you have to reconstruct what definitions of love you are being exposed to, even if it is painful. the reconstruction of how i see the world, comparatively from when i was younger to now, is how i plan to structure my future and my goals for success. with my very ambitious goals, it is often at times hard to remember to live for myself and not my career goals. david brooks, in his speech “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” (moreau week 2 ), highlights the self-analysis required to consciously construct your life to prioritize your loved ones and morality over the desire to be successful and your ambition as a human. even though “most of us...would say the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues...are they the ones i think about the most? no.” as a college student, especially a freshman, i often get caught up in the race against time to build my credentials and make connections, often forgetting that i am more than just a machine built to work for the rest of my life. a part of growing into adulthood is learning how you want to live your life, and more particularly how to be satisfied with the life you’re living. if i were to die, i do not want to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/108816 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/108816 be known as just a good worker. i want to be known as a high-spirited individual who was dedicated to making society a better place for those who come after her, be that in her family or in the world. while i simultaneously want to work hard to make the e�ort i have displayed so far to be more than just a number in my hometown, i believe in learning to make time for those who love me and time to love myself with my own passions and interests. an obstacle i often faced in my journey of self-discovery was the role of religion in my life. while i am now a renounced christian and self-declared agnostic, i still find the presence of religion in several aspects of my life, most significantly in the principles of my morality. professor david fagerberg, in his text “faith brings light to a dark world” (moreau week 3) talks about the light of life in the form of a metaphor to portray the misdirection often seen with the direction in which your light reflects. i thought this was interesting because he makes it a point to acknowledge that not all light reflecting upon one’s self is egotistical. this shows a duality that comes with having a light like this as your soul and, i believe it reflects human nature, displaying everyone is born with the ability and potential to be morally just and have to be taught negativity. furthermore, in kevin grove’s speech “two notre dames: your holy cross education” (moreau week 5), he illustrates the many e�orts holy cross priests have allowed their faith, which in turn impacts their morality and human nature, to construct what they choose to do with their careers, making avid e�orts to benefit society. grove goes on to emphasize “[their] lives are not [their] resumes… it’s just being who they are… letting faith and reason both in their fullness be applied to every part of life.” this was particularly appealing to me because, while i do not allow faith to actively guide my life in the same way these priests do, we both still stand by similar moral codes and both want the light of our souls to shine in positive ways. as i make the journey towards my future, i want to construct my life around the duality of being a benefit to my society, making the change i want to see for future generations, as well as building a stable successful foundation for myself so i can provide my family with the same opportunities to do so when the time comes. i believe that living your life solely for success isn’t living up to the true potential of your humanity, and in order to do so, you have to construct a just moral compass, be that by religion or some other influence. moreau integration 2 new experiences encountered at college within this semester i have indeed encountered more challenges and successes than i ever thought i would in college. in high school, i was used to breezing through my academics without much getting in my way; however, here at notre dame, i have been faced with academic rigor that i never have had before. i also have been challenged to become a more outgoing individual and meet new people. additionally, i have faced many struggles regarding my physical and mental health through this transition into college life. as i navigate through these challenges, it is also important to highlight the successes that have stemmed from them. for example, i have been able to be a part of groups that give me a greater sense of community and be involved in opportunities that i never thought i would have the chance to be a part of. one of the major challenges that i have faced at college thus far is the fact that i need to learn how to balance my school life and personal life. i have always been the kind of person that is driven for perfectionism. this mindset has indeed helped me to accomplish many things in my life but it also can hinder me too because i do not let myself relax or do anything less than “perfect” (which is oftentimes unattainable). i have had to tell myself that i do not need to do every single thing perfectly and instead, trying my best is all i can do. this new mindset i am trying to live by is illustrated in julia hogan’s words, “look at all of the options out there and pick the ones that you feel called to” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). this quote also pertains to the fact that i have had to limit myself to the amount of student groups i choose to belong in. in high school, i felt i needed to be in every possible group and hold a leadership role in everything i was a part of. in reality, this just wore me down and made student groups not as enjoyable as they could have been. coming to college has been a challenge in the fact that i needed to choose only a couple of groups that i was really and be an active member in those versus trying to do every group offered. being involved in a limited number of groups/activities on campus has helped to allow myself adequate time for homework and enough sleep. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau in addition to the challenges that i face when it comes to academics and extracurriculars in my life at college, i have also encountered struggles with issues regarding my physical and mental health. i face the struggle of my eating disorder daily and the thoughts regarding how much i should eat or exercise each day. although i have a treatment team here on campus, it definitely has not been as easy as i thought it would be transitioning to college. i feel that my mind is “split” into 2 parts-the logical side and the irrational side. the logical side of my mind knows that i need to eat an appropriate amount of food in order to fulfill my body’s needs and i should not exercise too much. however, the irrational side of my mind constantly tells me to eat less and exercise more. this raging battle in my mind is similar to the quote, “school leaders are placed squarely in the middle, trying to respond to the demands of both groups and looking for support from their boards and other stakeholders” ("should catholic schools teach critical race theory?" by christopher j. devron moreau fye week 10). although this quote refers to the struggle that school leaders face regarding racism, i think that this quote can parallel my mind and thoughts in the fact that i am torn between two mindsets because of my eating disorder “telling” me what it thinks i should do instead of what is actually logical to do. although i have encountered struggles throughout this semester while transitioning to college, i have also encountered successes as well. i have had the opportunity to meet new people from across the country and world, and i would have never experienced this if i had not come to notre dame. coming to notre dame has taught me more about the importance of developing connections and relationships with my peers. before college, i only talked to the same tight group of friends and never was forced to broaden my horizons when it came to interacting with other people outside of those i was familiar with already. notre dame has helped me to become more comfortable talking to new people and has helped me become more confident in doing so. i have begun to learn the importance of putting myself out there in order to create new relationships and friendships. i feel that i am less nervous to try new things because i know everyone else is probably also trying it for the first time. for example, i decided https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 to be a part of a student group called transpose dance collective. this group is for people who enjoy dancing and want to be in a dance recital. i have never danced in my life and have always been interested so i decided to try the club. although i was super nervous to join, looking back i am proud of myself for trying something new because i found a new hobby that i enjoy and i was able to meet new friends i would not have otherwise met. i think that by putting myself into a vulnerable position also can help others do so too. i think that i can lead by example by doing this. this concept closely aligns with the fact that, “the authority to lead toward community can emerge from anyone in an organization” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). i am able to be a leader simply by leading by example and trying new activities despite the fact that i may be nervous or embarrassed to do so. this can help encourage others to do so too since they see i am. i will continue to focus on the positives and successes that i encounter at college as well as learn from the challenges that i face. i think that my first semester at notre dame has definitely taught me how to better persevere through difficult times, and it has also shown the great rewards that can arise from these experiences i have encountered. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ moreau integration two 3 december 2021 big growth in small time i’ve had a lot of personal development in a short time, and i attribute some of that growth to my experiences in moreau. in the time i’ve spent reading and reflecting on the themes moreau introduced each week, i became aware of how far i’ve come, whether starting from the beginning of college or at other times in my life. one of the questions that came up for me again while engaging with moreau was, ‘what makes a good leader?’ when i was applying to college i reflected on many of my leadership experiences as part of putting together my application. that process included getting feedback from some of my teachers and mentors about their perspective on my leadership, like when i served as drum major in my school marching band. when it came to discussing leadership this year in moreau, there was a quote that stood out to me from parker j. palmer’s essay on community. he wrote that “leadership for community requires authority, a form of power that is freely granted to the leader by his or her followers. authority is granted to people who are perceived as authentic, as authoring their own words and actions rather than proceeding according to some organizational script” and this quote resonated with my experiences with leadership (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). whether it was as a leader myself, or my experience with leadership as part of an organization, when authority was not freely granted by the followers in the community, the organization failed to function as designed. i have had a positive experience with leadership in the band while at notre dame, because the students who lead us are capable, and most importantly, are given authority by the band members and directors. we just recently held auditions for the new drum majors, and the band was a large part of the decision making process. we dedicated an entire rehearsal to practicing with and evaluating the candidates and every member was given a vote in who they thought should be elected. the granting of authority from the community is one of the aspects of a good leader that i think is easily overlooked. as a result of coming to notre dame, i now have placed an increased importance on caring for myself. while everyone has basic needs they expend some focus on, now that i am living independent of my parents, i’ve discovered areas where i need to exercise care that my parents used to take care of for me. i think this is a continuation of a gradual increase that i’ve been experiencing since the onset of my chronic health issues, which forced me to focus much more on myself and my physical well being than i had before. i tend to be someone that spends more of my energy and time on the needs of others, and neglect my own needs. as fr. james b. king articulates, “adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” which has absolutely been my experience with my chronic pain, especially since it is still undiagnosed (“hope holy cross and the catholic education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). through this class and the focus on personal development and reflection, i’ve been able to take time to sit with myself and focus on my needs and beliefs. something that i’ve also discovered in this first semester at notre dame is a new challenge to my belief, or more accurately, lack of belief, in god. this came not from a theology class, but from my philosophy class. in metaphysics and epistemology, we were discussing arguments for and against a belief in god, and i came across an argument that was significantly convincing in arguing that the universe was likely designed by an intelligent creator. it didn’t go so far as to prove to me the existence of the god described by the catholic church, which was the faith tradition i was raised in, but it did make me question whether or not the universe was designed. in fr. jenkins’ address to the graduating class of seminarians in 2012, he described that “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other. each side has never been more eager yet more unable to dominate the other. both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). in philosophy class, i found a much better way to examine beliefs than the deep split that often exists between the religious and non-religious. both are often very firm to their convictions, and i would find that arguments made in support of their viewpoint don’t really address the concerns that the other side has. however, in philosophy the arguments presented all got to the heart of the issue when it comes to faith, and i stumbled into a more complicated view of the universe that i’m still figuring out. on the other hand, i’ve discovered clarity in another part of my life, relating to my career choices and what i feel called to do. when i began looking for a place to go to college, one of my requirements was that it was a university, with enough variety in majors that i could have different options to choose from and discern what career path i want. midway through my senior year, i settled on theatre as my chosen major, a tentative choice that i wasn’t sure of yet. i love both theatre and film, and i hope to be a director of either medium (or both) as my career. part of the reason i chose notre dame was because of the opportunity to take both film and theatre classes in the same major. i entered notre dame as an ftt major, and now at the end of the semester i feel confident that this is the place for me to be. i took film classes in high school, and was successful, including placing in an international film contest, but suffered from imposter syndrome around my skill and success in film. as elizabeth cox describes, “people who are highly skilled or accomplished tend to think others are just as skilled. this can spiral into feelings that they don’t deserve accolades and opportunities over other people” and that has been my experience with my accomplishments for almost as long as i can remember (“what is impostor syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). it’s been something i’ve been trying to work on for a long time, but i finally experienced some results with it when i got to notre dame. i received feedback from professors about my work and my insights that encouraged me to feel proud and like i belonged in this field. that it wasn’t just luck, or a result of my small class that i was achieving; that i actually have skill. i have much less frequent feelings of imposterism now, especially related to my skill in film and theatre. overall, i feel fortunate to have had this class and the opportunity to engage in so much personal development in such a short period of time. i’ve found more confidence in myself and also areas for new discovery. i look forward to more growth in the next semester and beyond. integration twomy journey my journey four months ago, i was still at home, slowly saying goodbye to my friends as they left for colleges across the country and anxiously awaiting leaving myself. after being stuck at home for nearly two years, i was welcoming the chance for a change of setting. but i was also nervous. i had never been on my own for more than a week. my family has always been very close and an important pillar in my life. i had always known that at the end of the day i was able to come home to my family and no matter what happened during my day, they would help me through it. while i knew that i would still be able to call them at college, it wasn’t going to be the same as being with them. college was the next step in my journey and while i was excited to go, i knew that my life was going to change and honestly i was scared of that change. i came to college with a few expectations already set in my mind. i expected that there was going to be a lot more freedom of choices. i expected a higher rigor of classes and an increase in my workload compared to high school. i expected to meet people from across the country all with unique backgrounds and personalities. bringing these expectations to college ultimately shaped my college experience because i was actively looking for them to be met. at college i have definitely encountered a significant increase in the degree of freedom that i have. i was able to choose my own classes, which allowed me to take microeconomics. a class that wasn’t for my major or a core requirement, but something that i was genuinely interested in. this freedom also applied to what i did outside of class. what clubs and activities i wanted to get involved with. i started working at the rock wall and was able to finally find more time to climb, something that i had always wanted to get into. however, i quickly learned that with more freedom comes more responsibility. i had to make sure that i found time for meals, working out, and making sure that i still got enough sleep. going to notre dame, i knew that i was going to find a very high academic rigor of classes. i definitely encountered this in all of my classes. the amount of work is a lot more than what i experienced in high school and the actual material in class is a lot more in depth. at first i found that i was really struggling in a few of my classes. this definitely didn’t help with my imposter syndrome. when i got my test scores back and started getting the first bs and cs of my life, i felt like i really didn’t belong. looking back, i think that part of what i was doing was using imposter syndrome as almost a shield itself. in thinking “oh it's ok that i’m not doing well because i shouldn’t even be here”. however throughout the semester i learned that was not the case. a big wake up call for me was during week 9 of moreau. when we discussed imposter syndrome in class i realized that it was a common thought, but that didn’t make it true. in elizabeth cox’s tedtalk, she talks about different strategies to combat the feeling of imposter syndrome, one of which being to talk about it rather than to hold it all in. (what is imposter syndrome? by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). with this advice i was able to positively respond to my imposter syndrome and i think i’ve come a long way to the point where i feel much better about the fact that i deserve to be where i am. one thing that i hoped to encounter at college was a diverse range of perspectives from my peers. during my transition from middle school to high school, i had gone from a small class of around 60 predominantly white students to a class of nearly 600 that was very ethnically diverse. this had a huge impact on shaping who i am and i learned the importance of diversity. coming to notre dame, i was honestly a little worried about the diversity, as it is a religious private college that is predominantly white. during week 10 of moreau we read an article on whether or not catholic schools should teach critical race theory (should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten). at this point, my fears had thankfully been put to rest as i had been able to meet students from all over with all different backgrounds and a wide range of perspectives, but the article supported my original fear or the lack of diversity and acceptance at catholic school. one thing that i encountered at notre dame, that i was not expecting, was the strong sense of community. right from the start during welcome week when everyone was saying, “welcome home” i feel like a community and the idea of the notre dame community has been emphasised at every opportunity, almost to the point where it would seem excessive to someone looking from the outside. however, now that i’ve all but finished my first semester here, i know that the push of the notre dame community was genuine. in week 11 of moreau, we read parker palmer’s thirteen ways of looking at community, while at first this may just seem like another way to promote community, the article itself offers critical views on community and how community is much more than just what is generally promoted (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven) . this article allowed me to look more critically at the community being promoted to us at notre dame, and it helped me ultimately decide that the community was genuine. everything that i have encountered thus far at notre dame has given my new expectations for not only next semester, but the next four years and honestly i also have expectations beyond college that were shaped during my first semester here. one thing that all of these new expectations have in common is that they reflect my hopefulness of my future at notre dame and beyond. week 12 of moreau was all about encountering hope. after reading the hope section of the holy cross and christian education paper, i came to the same conclusion of the importance of hope that moreau himself had come to (hope holy cross and christian education by father james king moreau fye week twelve). hope is necessary in order to give meaning to the things we do and to keep moving forward and that is why i am hopeful about my next four years at notre dame. week 9https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo week 10https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-bla ck-lives-matter-240792 week 11http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ week 12https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ untitled document will complete by sunday int 2 moreau integration two: a much-needed self reflection after experiencing failure, i continue to ask myself, “is it over? is it worth fighting for?” “we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" moreau fye week 9) my high school experience was, some would say, a storied history. it wasn’t perfect, but in some cases, i would say that i thrived. i had a great academic upward incline, i had several leadership positions and extracurriculars, and i volunteered almost every week. i put in the work, at my very underfunded, predominantly black and hispanic public high school in alief, texas, and it got me to notre dame. sure, occasionally i wouldn’t do well on an exam or a project, but i’ve never really been significantly thwarted by failure. i would just power through it. looking back, i wish i had been; i wish i had a precursor. for some reason, failure in college feels like the end of the world. i got myself here, to prove that i’m worthy, but when i get here everything goes south. why? and an even better question, why is it affecting me so much? this week's content introduced a topic that i was all too familiar with: imposter syndrome. attending a pretty much fully poc public high school that was rarely competitive (only the top 30 of us really “cared“) i didn’t really feel it. however, being one of the only ones in my high school to be shipped off to a college across the country, (let alone outside of houston or austin,) i soon began to notice that imposter syndrome came on the plane with me. they are not that many black students at the school there are way fewer black stem majors; i’ve acknowledged that. because of that, there’s this ongoing internal battle that i believe all black students at pwis face: overcompensating to demonstrate competence. always trying to present that i know what i’m doing, failure can mess up the entire process. and i would know because that’s where i’m at currently. day to day, i asked myself if fighting is even worth it. i don’t understand why failure is affecting me so much. i need to take a step back and realize exactly where i am: the first year in my first semester of college ever. i need to acknowledge the fact that first years, and other grades, are allowed to make mistakes, and are allowed to fail. period. unfortunately, in my journey at notre dame thus far, my personal health has decreased in importance. i didn’t think it would be easy. but, i also didn’t think it would be this hard. 7:49 am. i’m still awake for the nth time, but i don’t care, not as much as i should. back in high school, i would have nights like this, where my mom would come into my room screaming at one in the morning telling me to go to sleep, but i wouldn’t— i couldn’t go to sleep until my work was https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau done. i’m not proud to admit that the bad habit has traveled with me to college, but it has. and it sucks. in fact, i’m writing this coming off of an all-nighter. i feel like a drug addict; a gambler: i just can’t stop. i need peace. i need healing. the only thing that gets me through it is imagining being in the future and looking back on this experience and how it’s shaped me. “the good, the bad, the ugly” — all of it build me into the person that i want to be. (women find healing… moreau fye week 10) thinking about my poor excuse for personal health, i do agree that it has changed me. but i need to put these bad habits to rest. this week's content explores nontraditional healing. healing that i need. originally (somewhat) black and white, i realized that the relationship that leadership and community share is now more nuanced than i had thought. “long before a community can manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as “a capacity for connectedness”—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled…” (thirteen ways of looking at community moreau fye week 10) years ago, i saw the aspect of community as one that was unconditional. whether proximally or figuratively, i thought that if you were “in it,” you were in it. no complications, no questions asked. i feel it was easier to find community as a child; the fifth-grade psyche could only go so far, we weren’t plagued with controversial opinions or racism, or sexism, we were all just kids – it was easy. even further, there was no desire to step up, to become a leader. we were all just a community: no superiors or inferiors, just kids. however, as i got older i learned that there is more nuance to a community than i originally thought. originally unaware of leadership in the communities i was in, i found myself becoming a leader, to “connect” with my community. as proclaimed by palmer, there will be a disconnect; i noticed it as a leader. in doing so, you have to find common ground — a way to unite the masses despite the disconnect. my preferred method was inclusivity: finding any way to project the shared vision (capacity of connectedness) that my community should pursue (as a leader). through moreau fye, the concept of hope went from uncertainty to clear. “still, the first four principles of mind, heart, zeal, and family, important though they are, would have little distinctive christian purpose apart from hope in the cross of christ” (hope holy cross and christian education moreau fye week 12) this final week of moreau, i was tasked with a simple question: ”how can i live in hope?“ seemed easy enough, right? wrong. before this week, i’d only known hope as a simple emotion; not as a way of life. as someone who has lived with and without hope, this week‘s contact has introduced me to, essentially, and your way of living. after reading the text on holy cross education, i went on to research how i can live a life full of hope. i discovered that a life full of hope warrants a life full of possibilities. possibilities that were much stronger than the simple need to water desire certain things(i.e. what i determined hope to be before this). much https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ stronger than anticipation. fr. king calls on us to be “men with hope to bring.“ in pursuing living a hope-driven life, i wish to rebuild the resolve that i used to have. integration one anna vanavermaete professor theo helm moreau fys 10101 13 october 2021 a guide to a better self i believe that i am searching for freedom of expression. for my whole life, i’ve always bottled up my feelings. that is to say, not my feelings of happinessthose are easy to show. the feelings that are hard to show are the feelings of sadness and weakness. my fear of showing feelings stems from me not wanting other people to judge me because i care so much about what others think. during the first week of moreau, the topic was vulnerability. i remember how everyone was sharing experiences, and i couldn’t believe how comfortable they were with saying the things they were. i shared something that day that made me seem weak, and i still think about it some days, as it haunts me. in moreau, i really keep to myself. in a ted talk by brené brown, she says, “there was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it: that was the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe that they are worthy of love and belonging,’” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). last moreau class, when we were assigned groups, i talked a lot with my group members. i never talk to people in class because i feel like they won’t want to talk to me. this mindset really tears me down. in order to find the freedom of expression that i desire, i need to believe in myself: believe that i am worthy of love and belonging. i believe that i belong at notre dame. my entire life has revolved around academics. doing well in school is what made me feel good about myself. when i took my first chemistry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 test this year, i knew i did badly but when i checked my grade i was taken aback when i saw 69% staring back at me. a lot of people here at notre dame talk about imposter syndrome, and it has hit me hard this first semester, to say the least. in his ted talk, david brooks says, “and most of us, including me, would say that the eulogy virtues are the most important of the virtues. but at least in my case are they the ones i think about the most? and the answer is no,” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). it’s important to realize that god put me here for a reason, and he didn’t make a mistake. he knows i can handle the rigor of the academics here. not only that, but notre dame isn’t only about academics. i’m here at notre dame to grow in my faith and not just live for my résumé but also for my eulogy, because at the end of the day, being a good person is that much more important. being at notre dame is also about growing my faith. after just my first week here, i felt so much more connected to god. never in my life have i just been sitting around and thought, “i’m gonna go pray,” but during the first couple weeks, i took multiple trips to the grotto. during our week three of moreau, i learned that “at the core of oneself is the very presence of god,” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). quite often, i leave god out of my personal life but i’m looking to include him. in order to do so, i must put effort into my faith, something that i’ve not done as much in the past. i believe that who we surround ourselves with should bring out the best versions of ourselves. one of my goals this semester was to join some type of all girls engineering club. the club i joined is called society of women engineers and in the club, we were assigned bigs, and my big was telling me all the classes that would be good for me to take: just looking out for my best interests. in week four of moreau, one of the readings said, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term,” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). before i came to notre dame, i was in a relationship that my mom had to beg me to get out of. after coming to notre dame, i see why. the people i’ve met on this campus are some of the most genuine, kind hearted people. i should never have friendships that make me feel like i’m any less than i really am because that tears me down. friends are meant to lift you up and be a support system for you. i believe that i am shaped by my experiences. during a meeting with my advisor, she told me not to get the dual mba/engineering degree. she said it would be too much work and that it puts a lot of stress on the student. instead, she told me to get a minor in business. this motivated me to work even harder and set my mind on getting my mba and undergrad in five years. during the 176th commencement, carla harris told the graduates, “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson,” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris fye moreau week five). it’s easy to go through something and let it tear you down. instead of letting setbacks stay in the back of my mind for weeks, i need to think about how i can use the setbacks to push myself forward. moreover, during week six of moreau, we focused on what has formed us. for our assignment, we wrote about where we’re from. a lot of people talked about how they were from corn in their poems, including me. in the example “where i’m from” poem, george ella lyon writes, “[i’m from] fried corn and strong coffee,” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon fye moreau week six). it’s not just about the corn that we all remember but the memories and major moments that we had as kids. they made us who we are, and we can never leave behind those core memories. i can never forget where i came from when i continue on in my life. i believe that assumptions shouldn’t be made against anyone. at the first game of the season, my roommate and i were sitting in the student section watching the game. during the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html second half, an old white man said something racist to my roommate because she had braids in her hair and because of her skin color. immediately my roommate wanted to leave because she felt uncomfortable and also like she didn’t belong. in that moment, i felt so bad for my roommate but i had no idea how to stand up for her. in a ted talk by chimamanda ngozi adichie, she says, “that when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise,” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie fye moreau week seven). this is important to realize because when you don’t make assumptions you see that there is so much more to this world, to each individual, than meets the eye. i can learn to see people as not a single story, but get to know who they really are. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration two moreau integration two lucas saigh sucar e bernardez peggy hnatusko looking at what's happening to me on a piece of paper in the duration of this semester i have been looking deeper into myself. i have noticed some strengths that i have gained since i have started notre dame and some old flaws that have started to be erased. the way in which i first perceive others has changed and my actions towards them have evolved. what i have encountered thus far in my notre dame education has guided me to be a more accepting and open minded individual. encountering new experiences and opportunities has led me to be more curious about the world around me, different cultures, backgrounds and perspectives. ever since i was in middle school i have always set high expectations upon myself. this has not really changed over the years and even here at notre dame this attitude still persists. at the start of my time here i had to be a great student, participate in all possible activities, have a great social life, get a job and start preparing to get a summer internship. the following quote truly resonated with me and my past experiences “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). after encountering that my initial expectations for college were impossible, my mindset changed. i started to ask myself why i created these in the first place. these expectations hindered me more than they could ever help. looking to the future i plan to abandon these types of extreme expectations for myself. i need to have a clear mind and not focus on everything i could be doing. in the next few years i will not start with these high expectations and be able to achieve what i should be achieving. with this attitude i will not overthink my actions and be able to be free to enjoy my time here more. during my time here at notre dame my interpretation of brokenness has changed. this happened through personal experiences with my close friends and within an academic setting. the following quote caught my attention as it makes sense in my situation “the piece is more beautiful for having been broken” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). in my time here i have had occasions where in one of my classes i wasn't going as well as i expected. when i received my grade i felt broken but after putting in the work and improving i have never felt more confident in the subject. when i arrived my interpretation of brokenness was an abstract topic that only had negative connotations. going through occasions where i felt broken here i now can see that it's not that simple, although you cannot hope to be broken when you do what should be expected is that you will be stronger because of it. after these feelings pass you start to feel better and better each passing day. in the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau future i will look to accept moments where i am broken and embrace these as i am sure i will get stronger after they occur. the importance of brokenness is to know that you can and will be able to fix yourself and remember what is said in the video “the piece is more beautiful for having been broken” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). in my time at highschool i had a very closed mind when it came to conflict. it was simple conflict is bad and you should stay away from it as it only serves to distract and hurt you. this has not changed until the second half of the semester here at notre dame. the following quote resonated with me as it shows how i was wrong. “hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j palmer moreau fye week 11). at the start of the second half of the semester my closest friends got into a fight. i thought to myself conflict cannot happen, it's bad. after we got everything resolved i noticed that i couldn't have been more wrong. conflict isn't as “black and white” as i previously thought and in fact a very complicated topic. our friend group was even closer than before the fight and we understood each other better than ever. from now on i will look at conflict as the complex topic it is. conflict is not solely good or bad. i will not be constantly searching for conflict but if me and my friends get into it i am sure we will get out closer than before. since i sent my application into notre dame the feeling of hope has been present in me. the hope to get in, the hope to succeed, the hope to fit in. i always treated hope as a feeling of little importance as there is no need for hope if you're certain of success. the following quote demonstrates how hope is essential to a disciplined christian “still, the first four principles of mind, heart, zeal, and family, important though they are, would have little distinctive christian purpose apart from hope in the cross of christ. they constitute the foundation of an education in the faith, but a person’s capacity for lifelong discipleship is hard to predicate from exam results or resumes no matter how well formed he or she may be.” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). the quote shows how i was wrong in thinking hope was of little importance. hope helps keep you in line and leads you to success. without hope you would be lost and i have already noticed that my perception of hope has changed to an essential emotion. hope will lead me through the journey which is college. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration grace mckenna professor taylor moreau experience 14 october, 2021 not where i am from but who i am many people submit to the phrase “i will believe it when i see it.” however, so far in my journey in life, i have learned that believing is something you cannot at all see, but rather it is a feeling of confidence inside to motivate yourself and others. thrown into a new community where harder classes, busier schedules, and new faces everyday are the norm, it is extremely difficult to not only assimilate quickly into the new environment, but also to believe in your own abilities. notre dame has always been my dream school, a place where i believed magic existed. though my journey took a different route through the gateway program my confidence has soared to new heights just by being here. yet, like most new experiences they do not come without their challenges. the main obstacle has not only been to balance the new schedule, but also knowing everyone at college is a big fish. as a result, it's easy to feel even smaller—to think others are more intelligent, more athletic, more organized than you. however, through just a few weeks as a freshman being here, i have learned more about myself than ever. through my experiences so far at the university of notre dame and in the rotc program i have learned to believe in myself and that somehow it will all work out. but what do i really believe in? what is my future? these are the questions that have always challenged me day in and day out. yet, there is light at the end of the tunnel as according to dr. brown, “connection is why we are here. it's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). we need human interaction in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be order to feel, in order to learn how to love. vulnerability is the first step to form connections, without it we cannot recognize our strength and weaknesses or the values we hope to practice and preach. the morals we are taught however, are at a constant battle. joseph soloveitchik, a rabbi who wrote the book “the lonely man of faith,” explains that “these two-sides (adam one and adam two) of our nature are at war with each other”(video: should you live for your resume or your eulogy? (david brooks, ted) by david brooks moreau fye week two). he argues that we have two different personalities, one based on strengths and success, the other, our inner eulogy values, built on humility, respect, and selflessness. in order to be the best version of yourself, one needs to grow in both these values, understanding how to be successful, while maintaining dignity and love for the others before you. another aspect of believing is that of faith. while somewhat similar terms, faith has always been the actual action of exerting strong trust and confidence. david fagerberg writes, “hope anchors the soul” to reveal that one can overcome any obstacle if they have the right mindset (text: “faith brings light to a dark world” (professor david fagerberg, grotto)links to an external site. moreau fye week three). with faith in my own future, even with hard classes and certain expectations already falling short, i truly believe that no matter what it will all work out. i know there is a reason i am here today, so i will continue to use my faith to guide me through the bumps in the road. however, there are times when my trust is shaken and i find myself thinking, “who knows if they are actually going to come” (text: "5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (olivia t. taylor, grotto)links to an external site. moreau fye week four). whether it's your own friends bailing on you or plans that don’t come together, it's easy to pity yourself and lose trust in not only others but also in who you are as a person. yet, because of where i am from and the values instilled in me, i have realized that though “the seasons changed https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ like people did, we stayed true and never hid” (where i am from poemmoreau fye week five). that no matter what, i am always called to be myself and not let other people control my day. this same message of being in control of my own destiny has led me to realize that failure is a strength not a weakness. just as fr. kevin grove related the establishment of notre dame to “ a response to the failure of the first one,” i, too must learn from my failures (https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c 1-d0a45c429187 by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week six). success is viewed as the constant battle to keep climbing higher. humanity is never satisfied, that when even on a peak, we want another bar to raise. however, if we look closely into true success, it is built on failure. the failure to realize one’s mistakes and improve on them. notre dame has always had the stereotype of prestige and easy success; however, that is not the full story. just like chimamanda ngozi adichie explains, “the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete” (video: “danger of a single story” (chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted)moreau fye week seven). it is often easy to generalize a group of people or place without even realizing it. by looking at a course selection sheet, sometimes we only see a scary title too hard for us to try, or we see a group defined by their state, or a place in all its glory. however, these stereotypes hide the real power of identity. as a result, our existence circles back to vulnerability. if notre dame did not recognize its mistakes, it might not have improved to the powerful place we know it is today. similarly, if we do not accept failure and our weaknesses then we cannot grow either. we must be vulnerable to develop not shame, but acceptance, not doubt, but courage. however, opening up especially in a new and diverse place, is easier said than done. knowing your roots and inner values will https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story make the transition much easier. that is why during the difficult times i try my best to take another perspective. instead of stressing over the actual situation, i go back to the bigger picture of my beliefs. for life doesn't ever seem that bad because i believe my purpose is to connect with others. i believe that inner values are more important than outer ones. i believe that faith conquers all. i believe that trust is earned. i believe that failure is success. cashel o’connor father kevin integration two 23 november 2021 becoming a fish what are you made for? interesting question. i have been making a bucket-list of sorts during my time here at notre dame, so let’s explore that. these are things i want to accomplish sometime in my life, in no particular order. i believe that i am made for them. firstly, i want to be a ski instructor. growing up, skiing was a huge passion of mine. i know this sounds silly coming from a florida boy but it's true, i promise. my grandparents live in big sky, montana, and every year my family would go up to visit them, either over christmas or spring break. this is where i discovered my passion for skiing. i was born on the mountain, molded by it. skiing was my life. now, as a young adult, one of my greatest desires is to take my passion for skiing and transform it into something bigger than myself. i want to help other kids experience the joys of skiing. so, it is a goal of mine to one day become a ski instructor. playing off the instructor aspect of the first point, another dream of mine is to teach english in foreign country. for a while i was set on japan; however, now i am also considering korea. to be honest, who knows. if there’s one thing i’ve learned about myself, it's that my passions and interests are always shifting. nevertheless, one day i will teach english in a foreign country. another dream of mine is to travel europe. my grand plan is to study abroad and travel on the weekends, but this is just a plan. like eisenhower said, “in preparing for battle i have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.” it is the idea of setting goals like this that enthralls me, not so much delving into the minute details years beforehand. in europe, i want to see the dolomites, the alps, the rock of cashel (named after me) in ireland, italy, spain, hungary, and so much more. finally, the last item on the list is to start my own private wealth management firm. the catch to this is that i want to structure the compensation system ethically, allowing me to help people grow their financial wealth at a vertiginous rate. don’t worry, i am aware that money cannot guarantee happiness. however, i am a firm believer that a shortage of money hinders happiness. by starting my own firm and ethically structuring the compensation, i aspire to provide people with happier lives without taking anything away from them. this, i feel, will help me with my ultimate goal: fulfilment. in week 2, we talked about having to “give to receive,” and i see this as the perfect way to give to others. what are you made of? recently i read a poem called “gospel” by stephen scobie for my theology class. this poem really exposed me to the idea of perspective it is written from what seems to me as jesus’s perspective on his life. seeing jesus show anxiety and uncertainty, as a result of being fully human, really shocked me at my core. what i am getting at here is the idea of perspective. in week 7 we listened to chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk, in which she said. “stories matter. many stories matter.” in scobie’s poem, i heard another story. matthew, mark, luke, and john are all stories about jesus that i am familiar with; however, the poem offered me a new perspective. instead of looking at jesus from the outside, i looked at him from the inside for the first time. this brought me to a deeper realization: people only know me as an outsider looking in. in a sense, they only know me as much as i let them; they can’t hear my thoughts, my reasonings, my convictions, my motivations, my goals, or my beliefs... unless i tell them myself! so, in a very convoluted way, i have just explained why i believe that i don’t have the words or time to express to you all of what i am made of. i believe that actions play a role in this and i can’t communicate actions in a paper; however, i also believe that i can still do the prompt justice by explaining part of what i am made of. even if i cannot give you the whole story, hopefully i can give you the important parts. the best way to express my story to others is to reach a point of vulnerability and form, as week 4 describes it, a “healthy relationship.” this means that we can, “talk honestly and freely to each other.” thankfully, i feel as if i have made many of those already in my brief time here at notre dame. in week 6 we wrote “where i’m from'' poems. mine was, in my typical fashion, very lighthearted and humorous. however, after returning to my beloved home of boca raton, florida for thanksgiving break, i realized that where i’m from plays an integral part in explaining what i am made of. in fact, i think the poem itself is an excellent expression of what i am made of: i am made of humor. i love to make people laugh and it is a huge part of what i am. however, as brené brown said in week 1, “we cannot selectively numb emotion.” since humor is such a vital part of my life, it stands to reason that negative emotions play an important part as well. thankfully, in week 3 father pete talked to us about creating and applying a standardized framework in our lives. here at notre dame, i feel as if i have succeeded in establishing a framework to help deal with emotions that in the past i would prefer to “numb.” as i said in week 9, when responding to dissonance, “i close my eyes, go to my mental cave, see my power animal, and remind myself that i am doing my best and that is the best i can do.” i think that, again, humor is my best device in accomplishing this. once again, i am made of humor. in week 10, i talked about metaphysics of identity, specifically the ship of theseus. going further, i learned recently about a different way to view the same problem. simply put, can one ever say they swam in the same river twice? since the water is constantly flowing downstream, it stands to reckon that you will never be swimming in the same water twice so are you still swimming in the same river? i have come to believe that the answer to these questions and more like them is yes and no. complex but warranted, for in my mind identity is subjective not objective. as a person, i change and grow everyday. i feel as if i am very different from myself several years ago, even several months ago, yet at the same time i am still the same cash you are familiar with. in my view, it is best to allow the changes to add onto your identity and complement your character, but not let them engulf your identity entirely. i address this last part to my future self: what i am trying to say is: don’t be afraid to change. it’s part of life. however, don’t let the change separate you from who you really are, your true identity a man of joyous whimsy who has a bucket list to get through. it is time to become a fish. finding happiness: an unfinished journey moreau first year experience professor wagner 3 december 2021 finding happiness: an unfinished journey what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? this semester has been particularly rough, especially as i’ve found myself trying to adjust to a new place, away from the comfort of my home and parents. while there have been good moments throughout this first semester, a lot of the time i have found myself unhappy in my situation. the main question i’ve found myself asking this semester is: “do i enjoy it here, or would it be better if i transferred somewhere easier?” for this question, i think back to a specific chemistry quiz that i recently completed. i studied so hard, staying up until two in the morning for nights before the exam, trying to learn the material. while taking the quiz, i knew the results would not be what i wanted. i rushed back to my dorm after, fighting back tears as i walked. when i got back to the dorm, i realized i could not go into my room as my roommate was still asleep. i was sobbing at this point, one of those loud, deep cries that you can’t suppress. i wound up crying in the far stairwell that no one uses. that day, i was so fed up with academics, the cold, and being away from loved ones that i went to the common app and started filling out a transfer application for the university of miami, located only fifteen minutes from my house in miami. i completed half of it, and then shut my computer and just sat there. a million thoughts were racing through my mind. i knew that if i transferred i would be backing down from a challenge, and my parents would not want me to do so. on top of that, i had once been so excited to come to notre dame, and now i couldn't wait to leave. i was lost. correction, i’m still pretty lost. looking back, i now think of julia hogan’s advice, where she says, “trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan, grotto moreau fye week nine). the problem is, i don’t exactly know what i feel called to do. on top of that, as i reflected on in my previous integration, i’ve always struggled with trusting myself, often trying to rely on others to make my decisions for me. coming to notre dame was one of the decisions i made for myself, but every day i feel myself questioning this choice. i’ve tried to turn to god during this time, hoping that he will guide me where i need to be. alas, i’m still lost, and often blame him for how unhappy i am. i’m reminded of c.s. lewis’s the screwtape letters chapter 8 when i think of how lost and angry i am. screwtape mentions that god “wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles” ("the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). well, i’m stumbling right now, and i wish that god could put his hand behind my back, guiding me through it all. i guess god would be pleased that i’m trying to push forward, although as of https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188325?wrap=1 right now i don’t know where forward is. i visit the grotto though, and i try to remain positive, and i think that’s all i can truly do. what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? i think that the importance of putting my mental health and emotional well-being first has increased as a result of my notre dame journey thus far. in the case of my mental health, i am constantly stressed and overwhelmed, freaking out over the tiniest of things. i used to, and sometimes still do, spend most of my time alone in my room. as a result, i’ve felt isolated from my friends. the other day, i posted on my snapchat private story that i was unhappy here, and that this would never be my home. one of my friends, catie, who also goes to college out of state responded, asking me why i was so sad. when i told her that i felt alone in this new place, she gave me some advice that resonated with me. she said, “why don’t you make more of an effort to get out of your room? that's probably why you're so miserable.” it was straight to the point, with no cushioning whatsoever. thinking about it like that, i realized i had been choosing not to leave my dorm or hang out with people, and that i was not forced to continue doing so. like palmer discusses in his “thirteen ways of looking at community”, a community can be found even with those who i do not consider intimate or close friends, and “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer, center for courage & renewal moreau fye week eleven). in other words, i can’t keep sitting in my room alone, i have to go out and engage myself with others even if i’m not extremely close with them. by doing so, i have made a really sweet friend with whom i can talk about deeper topics, and i’m grateful for her. i like being alone sometimes, though, and i don’t necessarily think there is anything wrong with that. however, i have realized throughout the semester that i also need to engage with those around me to improve my mental health. one of my friends in my dorm also suggested that i look into mcwell and the counseling center they have there; she even said that she would be willing to go with me if i did not know where it was or how to get to it, and i think i may take her up on her offer. i’m working to heal, despite the cracks that reside in me. this ties in with the message that can be found in grotto’s women find healing through kintsugi workshop video, which our class talked about during week 10. this video touches on the idea that we can mend our broken pieces within ourselves, just like one can mend a broken cup with glue, creating artwork in the process ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grotto moreau fye week ten). the message behind the video resonated with me, as i learned that by first attempting to fix the brokenness within myself, i can then fix my relationships with those around me, which will be healthier because i will be more open to sharing how i truly feel. reflecting on this, the sculpture of the hand made up of various different woods comes to mind. when i think of this sculpture, i am the arm reaching out for help, and the girls in my dorm are the ones who are reaching out to help me. i plan on taking the first step and hopefully talking to someone about my feelings regarding my experience here, but even if i don’t, i know that i can not close http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau myself off to others, but rather lean on them as pillars of support, engaging in the gift of community. what was once “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? what once was “black and white” that is now more complicated was the fact i wanted to attend notre dame throughout high school as i believed i’d be happy here, and now that i’m here i’m unsure of whether this is right for me. i love the campus community, game days, and crisp fall days where the sun is shining. i don’t like the permacloud that is present in the winter, the overwhelming academic pressure, or being away from my parents. i realize that i am being a bit negative, but this has been a constant struggle throughout my journey at notre dame. i don’t know what i want. granted, i will say that i’ve come a long way from when i first got here. when i first arrived here, i was never experienced in doing anything for myself, my mom would always help me. however, as the semester has progressed, i have learned to do my laundry, cook for myself (very simple recipes), build furniture, and travel frequently by myself. when i first started doing all these things, i was afraid i would mess up; in fact, i did mess up, but that only helped me grow. i followed emily bergmann’s advice from week 9, as she reminded me that i needed to “give [myself] time to adjust” ("advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmann, ny times moreau fye week nine). i was happy to hear from my classmates in moreau that they too felt as if they were still adjusting, questioning if we’d ever really truly adjust to this new way of life. this question was contested a bit throughout the class, but that was exactly what i needed to hear at the time. like emily, i am still trying to understand the ins and outs of college, learning that it is not exactly what my expectations had led me to believe and that this is okay. when first learning to do laundry, i got bleach stains on one of my favorite shirts. when learning to cook, i burnt the chicken i was cooking and had to throw it out. when building my dresser, i had to reassemble it multiple times because i kept messing up. when first traveling by myself, my plane got delayed and i missed my connecting flight. some of these experiences were frustrating, others scary, but what i learned in each was that i was growing. i don’t want to transfer, as i am still adjusting and figuring things out. however, i wonder if i will find my happiness here, or if it resides somewhere else. i guess this is what is unclear to me now, but i’m trying my best to figure this out, giving myself time and having patience with myself in the process. what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity is the fact that i don’t know where i’m going, and that this is okay. it is okay to be lost or unsure of the next step, as long as i am open to all possibilities and ultimately do what is right for me. when completing the week 12 moreau assignment, king’s claim that the “contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” stood out to me (“hope holy cross and christian education” pages 14 16 by fr. james https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). i had heard of this concept before in my high school theology class, but it had never truly resonated with me until this year when i found myself struggling to accept that i do not know what i want to major in or where i’m headed in life. i remember asking my advisor for help discerning the path i should take, and he simply responded that this was not his choice to make. it was because of this that i realized i must accept that i do not know where i’m headed, despite my previous attempts to plan everything. although i struggle with this conversion of heart and mind, i know that i need to have hope that i will eventually find the answers to the questions i struggle with now. i also know that it will get better, that i’ll eventually find my way. i hope that like father john jenkins mentions in the wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, my faith “can have a transforming effect on the world” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). father john’s address reminded me of the unrest our world faces and the separation between people. i think that the separation between people may in part be due to the fact that a lot of people are lost, taking out their frustration on others. if we are not true to ourselves, how could we possibly be true to others? my hope is i will be transformed by my faith, healing myself from the inside out, which in turn will translate into my actions having a positive impact on those around me. perhaps i could share my experience with the freshman next year if they are going through a rough time. either way, i know that i must reflect on my happiness and well-being here, as that is the only true way that i will discern whether or not this is right for me. https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ facing adversity i feel that my experiences at notre dame thus far this semester have taught me a lot about how i deal with adversity and how i challenge myself to be a strong and successful leader. coming to college, i encountered a host of new experiences. i was in a new place far from home with people i did not know. i had always considered myself to be an outgoing person, but this took my extroversion to a new level. i have also learned to allow myself to fail. in high school, i had always been the best at everything i tried. i played for the state runner up basketball team; i was a national merit scholar; i was class president. until i got to notre dame, i didn’t realize what it was like to not be the best. at first, i found myself fairly frustrated with this, but then i realized that i didn’t have to be the best. everybody has different skills and all i need is to be the best version of myself that i can be. in julia hogan’s article, she explains the danger of setting high expectations for ourselves: “if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) i feel that i enjoyed my time at notre dame much more when i shifted my focus to enjoying that time, instead of stressing about my level of success. another aspect of myself that has grown since i arrived at notre dame is my ability to encounter alternative viewpoints. as a political science major and the freshman representative of college republicans, i obviously have strong viewpoints. however, i have encountered many people who do not share my viewpoint, and have become close friends with many of them. back home, i never encountered anyone who thought differently from me because i lived in a fairly homogenous community, we were all from the area, and our family roots went way back. i found that when i had meaningful conversations with people different from myself, i felt my respect for their position grow, and i could tell that their respect for my opinions grew as well. father jenkins said, in his speech to the wesley theological seminary, “to stand apart, proclaim my position, and refuse to talk except to judge does not reduce hatred or promote love.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john i. jenkins moreau fye week 10) i have tried to embrace this outlook whenever i encounter people who are different than myself. another thing that i encountered during my time at was trying to discover how i fit into the community around me. it was hard at first to figure out who my close friends were going to be and who i would be friends with but not spend much time with and who i wouldn’t hang out with that much. i just decided to do as much as i could with as many people as possible, and i found that my community developed around me. i have found my hall to be an exceptional group of men, i enjoy spending time with all of them and am getting to know more and more guys in the hall every day. i have also found plenty of ways for me to be a leader and a valued member of the hall community. i enjoy being the person who people ask for help or for advice when they need it. i really want to be the person who everyone wants to be around, because i lift them up and make them feel better about themselves and the world around them through spending time with me. i think the thing i didn’t realize coming to notre dame was that i couldn’t create a community around myself, i needed to allow the community to develop and find my place inside it. parker j. palmer had a quote that i feel summed this concept up very well, “community is not a goal to be achieved, but a gift to be received.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11) i am very glad that i was able to have the experience of fitting into a new community because it definitely helped me grow as a person. one of my favorite aspects of notre dame is the opportunity to focus on god. i wasn’t extremely concerned with having access to religion in college, but i am so glad that i chose notre dame because i have found god to be the best outlet for my stress and troubles. whenever i have faced a problem or had a big test coming up, i tried all different ways to cope with that issue; however, i found that turning to god helped me feel the most fulfilled and best prepared to cope with my problems. i really never turned to god outside of church back home. i didn’t pray regularly or think of god’s plan that often. however, ever since i have increased my focus on god, i have felt more at peace and more comfortable with my place in the world. in the screwtape letters, the demon mentions that “in his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks.” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12) this emphasizes to me that when turn to god in our struggles, we have an even greater opportunity to know him better. it is easy to pray to god and hope in him whenever things are going well. but, if we can continue to keep our eyes on his face through hard times, we will get through those times more easily and we will grow closer to god through our sufferings. i feel that over the past semester, i have learned so much about myself, how to respond to adversity, and how i fit as a member of the larger notre dame community. 12/3/2021 margaret hnatusko moreaufirst year experience embracing uncomfort over thanksgiving, i traveled to my new home for the first time. my dad picked me up from an unfamiliar airport in a new car, and i walked into a freshly-constructed house with empty walls, where i would be staying in the guest room. new school, new home, new friends, new places: i truly felt like a nomad. i was disconnected from anything that held the familiarity of home. in the beginning, i felt ready for the change. i dove headfirst into my new life, but as semester dragged on and the assignments piled up, i began to feel more and more overwhelmed and alone. from difficult classes to navigating new friendships to calling a new state home, i’ve encountered many challenges in my first semester. amidst these difficulties, i’ve learned to trust myself and embrace the unfamiliarity of my new life. in high school, i was used to being considered one of the high-achieving students. i did well in my classes, and i helped to tutor other students. however, high school was much different than mendoza. here, i was out of my element: i was in a male-led major, and i had never even taken a business class before. i usually shrank back in my accountancy class and let the boys answer my professor’s questions. even later in the semester when i had gained some confidence in my abilities, i still experienced the same conflict in group projects. my analysis was questioned more, and it seemed as though one of my (male) group members needed to check my work, as if i was incompetent of coming to the correct answer myself. i had to fight harder to have my ideas heard. experiencing discourse is common. we separate ourselves into groups by shared experiences, similar ideologies, or even physical attributes, and petty differences can often grow into large conflicts. as father jenkins said, “two hundred and twenty-five years later, we are like actors following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others.” however, he also believes that this conviction used to divide can similarly unite: “if we can help solve the problem of hatred, we have a chance to come together and solve all the others” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau week 10). differences aside, every person deserves to be heard and respected. experiencing conflict in the classroom, where i usually excelled, taught me the importance of focusing on my own work. i learned to advocate not only for myself, but for my other classmates fighting to have their voice heard. the community of notre dame is at its best when all facets of its students are appreciated. professor fuentes says in his tedtalk, “we cannot love the god we cannot see without loving the brother we can” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau week 11). notre dame admits students from all over the world, and i’ve enjoyed meeting new people and hearing about their lives-i even got some of my friends to try wisconsin-famous cheese curds. the holy cross teachings of celebrating each other’s differences has created a diverse community that only enriches our academic learning. coming to notre dame, i didn’t know a single person on campus. the unfamiliarity was daunting, but i encountered people who were excited to hear about me. i’ve been surprised by the amount of shared experiences that i have, whether it’s with my roommate from louisville or my friend from london. i’ve felt bonds and friendships grow in importance the more time i spend at notre dame. true, it’s difficult to feel strong bonds with such new people, and i definitely have struggled with making new friends and finding my place in the community. there are times i feel overwhelmed by the many introductions, but each week i make more progress. my biggest challenge at notre dame has been my question of belonging. as the semester continued, i found myself asking the same question more and more: do i really belong here? i look around at my new friends, who are effortlessly making new connections, excelling in their classes, and joining new clubs. they excitedly talk about their future goals while i think to myself, “how could we have started at the same time?” here i was, struggling to meet new people, unsure of my major and my career, and not even sure if i was in the right place. in my mind, there was no way that i belonged with future doctors and perfect socialites. i wished that i was as confident in my future as they were. impostor syndrome is very prevalent among students, and i’ve been no exception. however, after talking with some of my classmates, i realized that a lot of people weren’t entirely in control either. people were transferring in and out of mendoza, adding majors and minors, and experimenting in new classes. though it didn’t change much, it was relieving to know i wasn’t alone in my worries. as julia hogan writes, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau week 9). sure, some of my friends have a path in which they know exactly where they’re going. my path zig-zags and turns as i try to figure out my destination, and that’s okay too. i’m excited about the detours i’m taking. though it has its challenges, i’ve learned to embrace my journey, and i hope that eventually my destination will become clear. hope: it stands as the cornerstone of christianity and the holy cross education. hope is one of the most powerful tools that faith gives you. “still, the first four principles of mind, heart, zeal, and family, important though they are, would have little distinctive christian purpose apart from hope in the cross of christ” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau week 12). hope serves as the foundation for all other virtues, and it shapes students and members of the holy cross alike. having hope for the future means putting your faith in forces outside of yourself: in the universe, in god, in others. the idea of hope amidst adversity dates back to the beginning of christianity; jesus with his cross. he sacrificed himself so that we could be forgiven. in the worst of times, he gave us hope for our future. there are many things i am continually hoping for: for my academic and social success at notre dame, to find good people that i can rely on well past my 4 years, and my success later in life. with so much unknown about my major and my career, i have to put my faith in god and hope for success and happiness in my life. in just a few mere months, my life has transformed into something completely new. i’m at a new school with new classes and new people. with so much unfamiliarity, it's easy to feel overwhelmed or insufficient. the only way to survive is to embrace the changes and have hope that it will work itself out. in a semester, i have experienced new classes, met new people, and become accustomed to a new life. i am proud of all that i have accomplished in a few months, and i have hope for all that is in store for me in the next few years. moreau integration one charles luke charles luke drew espeseth moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 integration one what do i believe? i believe that god is good and that having a relationship with him, others, and yourself are the three most important things in life. this root belief is more essential to my existence than anything else. through the first seven weeks of moreau i have been forced to look deeper into myself than ever before, and with this searching i learned some things i liked and many things i did not like about who i am. this does not mean i dislike myself, i simply dislike certain character flaws and know these are areas of improvement for me. rather than taking this self-critiquing as an insult, i want to take it as a challenge to better myself and more truthfully and genuinely live out what i believe. while it is easy for me to know internally what my root beliefs are, the difficulty lies in making sure i act as if i believe those things every single moment, and up to this point i have not been. first, i believe that belonging, at least for me, to something bigger than myself is one of the most crucial aspects of enjoying life. this could be a family, group of friends, or even a sports team, but having others for support when life is hard makes everything a little more manageable. a quote that really resonated with me reads, “connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives meaning and purpose to our lives” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i also believe that i cannot truly belong if i am not my authentic self. being oneself involves knowing strengths and weaknesses, what to depend on versus what to work on. i often wonder whether it is better to focus on my strengths or weaknesses and it simply https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be comes down to this idea: “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i am certain i would rather build up my eulogy characteristics than my resumé, but most of the time i find myself doing the opposite. next, i believe that my faith defines who i am, and if i live according to that faith, my life will be satisfying. eternity in heaven is my ultimate goal, and this puts a lot of pressure on me to live out my faith on earth. of course i mess up a lot, but as fr. mccormick said, “be patient. if you’re in a hurry, faith becomes so much harder to understand” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). this idea of being patient with my faith life is something that i keep trying to emphasize in my life, but am not always successful at. it is very easy to get angry with myself over mistakes but this is not a rewarding path to take, rather, it is better to take my journey with god one step at a time. similarly, i believe that forging life-giving relationships with not just god but also others should be a priority in my life. this is something that i actually feel i do well at, both at picking the right people to have these relationships with and also keeping the relationships mutual and healthy. “beware of the friend who says they hate drama. unfortunately, this is usually the kind of friend who actually loves drama and frequently finds himor herself in the center of it” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). this was actually something i had recognized before coming to notre dame, but it has been proven true here as well. i do not particularly like or dislike drama, but i know from experience that having it in my life all the time is exhausting and something i would rather do without. subsequently, i believe that truth and logic are needed to make my life on earth meaningful. fr. grove says, “if we’re really searching for truth in whatever we study, then we https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ need both faith and reason” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). while i emphasized the importance of faith earlier, of near importance is reason, because faith should not be blind if reason can be found for it. i believe that where i am from, both the location and the people and things that shaped me are the earthly things i love most. this idea of origin and shaping influences is unique to every person, no one has had the exact same experiences and no one can take away from what made me the person i am now (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) while i love the things that have shaped me, i know that many do not love their own individual influences, and thus feel blessed to have lived my story of life so far. those who are not so lucky include people who have been disadvantaged from the start. a study says, “a majority of people taking this test show evidence of implicit bias, suggesting that most individuals are implicitly biased even if they do not think of themselves as prejudiced” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week seven). so, those who are not so lucky are those who suffer the most from this “implicit bias”, and i do not think that includes me. what i want to do to resolve this issue is essentially help educate where others and myself have biases and do not realize it. recognizing these problems is the first step to fixing them. ultimately, i believe that god is in control and people will figure things out here soon. i hope so anyway. these first several weeks of moreau fye have taught me about not only myself but also others and god, how to build relationships and recognize struggles. i believe that if everyone tried a little harder to understand what other people are going through, the world would be a much better place to live. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ 11-27-21 the incentive for hope and optimism moreau first year experience was enlightening as it covered aspects of fairness and introduced me to different perspectives. both racial and religious experiences have been emphasized through the detailed discussions i have conducted. the concepts of hope, community, pluralistic ignorance, and faith were discussed and explicated throughout the class. the quote, “who says you have to meet society’s expectations for the perfect body? who even set those expectations?” by julia hogan speaks to the societal norms that damage people’s self-esteem and make them deeply self-conscious about their “shortcomings” (letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). this array of societal expectations make us unable to be satisfied with who we are currently. instead, we continuously reach for a goal in the interest of making society proud instead of ourselves. seeking to fulfill societal expectations blinds us from ourselves and inadvertently leaves us devoid of self-integrity. hogan echoes this sentiment by proposing that people should emphasize and proudly wear their personal traits rather than seeking to encapsulate an imaginary vessel of societal expectations. the concept of imposter syndrome speaks to how insecure i was prior to arriving at notre dame. i had manifested the thought that i fell below the caliber of intelligence that notre dame had for its students. this feeling of pessimism about my place at notre dame contributed to “pluralistic ignorance”. doubts about the caliber of my abilities fueled my first few weeks at notre dame; leaving me with feelings of hopelessness and hesitation. fortunately, my interactions with other students helped to forge a sense of self-confidence and welcoming. the quote, “francis looks through a structural lens to detect systemic injustices and calls on people of faith to dismantle them,” demonstrates how leaders are acknowledging the inherit injustices rooted within a myriad of societal aspects (wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten) . facets such as the criminal justice system, housing, economics, and health care are plagued with racial biases and preconceived notions that subsequently hurt our progress toward equity. neglecting these innate shortcomings will lead to long-term consequences that exacerbate the contemporary discrimination in our society. at the same time, it is unfair to execute change through violent acts of social activism. so rather than using forceful activism, we should instead follow a passive albeit persistent approach that creates a bipartisanship between both sides of the political spectrum in the interest of promoting positive change. although i grew up in a racially homogenous city, i can empathize with the persistent calls for change that have sprouted throughout various news outlets. the article by christopher devron encapsulates prominent opinions voiced by the both sides of the political spectrum and proposes a “both/and approach” that seeks to create a more equitable environment for for minorities. so by the standards of john paul ii and francis, we can identify examples of structural or systemic racism throughout society at large as well as in catholic jesuit education. the quote, “we cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation,” says that we must forge an acquiescent environment for everyone (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). this does not always imply sitting cross-legged and chanting a mantra, though it may help certain people. by contemplation, i mean any method of breaking through the illusion of separateness to experience the reality of interdependence. failure, sorrow, and loss have been the deepest kinds of introspection in my life. we are all part of a community, whether we realize it or not, whether we like it or not, whether we honor it or not. the concept of community emanates from the human heart.hard experiencessuch as meeting the enemy within or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 11-27-21 inevitable part of living with other individuals are not the death of a community. community is less like a garden and more like a crucible after the first flush of romance. community requires leadership, and it requires more leadership, and it requires more leader, not less, than bureaucracies. a hierarchical organization, with its well-defined roles, rules, and relationships, is better ableto operate on automatic pilot than is a community, with its chaotic and unpredictable energy field. the article titled hope-holy cross and christian education quotes, “moreau spent his childhood years watching the church struggle to regain its footing and sustain itself against lingering discrimination…” echoes much of how society today is struggling to find its footing amongst a slew of discriminatory events that occur throughout the world (holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week twelve). we are frequently bombarded with tragic stories about oppression and defragmentation. like moreau, society today continues to struggle to maintain its stability. society’s propensity to ignite violence in times of peace destroys the potential harmony that could exist. this inclination is the cause for social stagnation throughout the world; motivating people to become less open to bipartisanship. to echo the holy cross article, a profound education and instillment of values prevents stigmas and fosters a more equitable community. just as the dogmas and interests of the church and society were increasingly straining the traditional understanding. i empathize with the article because it echoes much of the sentiments expressed by the community. just as moreau intensified his efforts to promote a profound education, it’s vital that we take what moreau pioneered and make it a natural part of our lives. our education similarly aims to develop students’ intellectual capacities within the context of a broad curriculum. competence can be earned through a myriad of different ways but courage is instilled over time by cultivating one’s heart and constantly directing its purpose beyond one’s self. it is a process that requires spiritual and vocational formation. ultimately, the class combines integrity with the importance of understanding new perspectives. i remember learning about how to forge a strong community and perceptual illusions rooted in feelings of hopeless in certain communities on campus. the class also outlined aspects of negligence in the classroom when considering ways to circumvent harm in neglectful relationships. in addition, the concept of community and hope has helped to forge a deeper understanding between perspectives. these insightful discussions have helped to instill positive values to various individuals and has made notre dame a more equitable place for a community of diverse perspectives. https://nd4-my.sharepoint.com/:w:/g/personal/omartine_nd_edu/eb1jmaa_r7dhoeaft6zuo6ybpkvkrxor2tj2i8z0vy6zrg https://nd4-my.sharepoint.com/:w:/g/personal/omartine_nd_edu/eb1jmaa_r7dhoeaft6zuo6ybpkvkrxor2tj2i8z0vy6zrg integration one three beliefs, and why they’re there the first of my root beliefs explains how i relate to other people. this root belief is: “i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being authentic.” authenticity is one of the primary things that makes me act the way i do: i say what i think, express how i feel, keep relatively few secrets, and have trouble staying quiet when i think something isn’t right. it is for this reason i really admire some of the student reflections from week three. “my faith is really guided by… social justice, so i’ve been drawn to the ideas of liberation theology” (“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by kyle, class of 2023 moreau fye week two). i’m probably not as much of an activist as kyle, but i admire his dedication to doing what he knows is right. regardless, while authenticity isn’t exactly something that i’ve had to aspire to (it comes to me naturally) it is something that has been challenged: if people don’t like you, it hurts more when the person they don’t like really is you rather than a facade. similarly, it’s very embarrassing to loudly profess your opinion in a scenario, only for your opinions to grow or change, and for you to realize you were expressly in the wrong later on. but as brené brown said, risking vulnerability is the only way to truly be authentic. when she talked about the happiest people she interviewed, she said, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you absolutely have to do that for connection. they fully embraced vulnerability,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). over time, i decided that it was worth it to be authentic, and the week one moreau’s video with brené brown really was able to voice some of the reasons i decided to make that choice. after all, as pointed out in the quote by brené brown, vulnerability is not only required for authenticity, it is also required for connection. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be this leads to my second root belief: “i believe that i am made to find connection.” i think this is true of all human beings… everyone needs other people, and these relationships especially need to be healthy. in her article olivia taylor gives an example of conversation in a healthy friendship: “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” which i think everyone can agree with (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). i also believe that the week six assignment (the where i’m from poem) also implicitly recognizes the need for authenticity in relationships. while george ella lyon on her website emphasizes the need for both diversity and authenticity to the self in one’s own writing, the concept behind writing and then sharing a where i’m from poem in the curriculum seems to have roots in the idea of sharing one’s authentic self with one’s classmates (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon, moreau fye week six). the idea that i need connection has never been challenged at notre dame, rather, i’ve found that idea has become more true. while i love spending alone time, coming to college has demonstrated to me the fact that i need social connection. unlike back home (where i was almost never lonely) i needed to actively seek out other people at notre dame, because moving away from home makes you lonely. the experience of moving to college cemented this root belief. coming to this conclusion at notre dame helped me form new habits when it comes to finding companionship and making new friends. this is also why i believe david brooks when he writes, “[o]ne of the great projects of schooling and culture is to educate the passions”... because sometimes, it really is how someone feels that counts (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks, moreau fye week seven). these kinds of experiences have forced me to think about what it really is that i enjoy, because i’ve had to uproot from a lot of things that are familiar. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare my third root belief also has to do with how i relate to others. it is: “ i believe that my purpose is to both a) live a good life for myself and b) improve the lives of others.” this belief really centers around one axiom: take care of yourself, and take care of others. david brooks touches on this in his ted talk, discussing the conflicting natures of what he calls adam i and adam ii: “soloveitchik said there are two sides of our nature… adam i is the worldly, ambitious, external side of our nature… adam ii is the humble side of our nature. adam ii wants not only to do good but to be good,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreau fye week two). in this, he contrasts what he calls resume virtues (ambition, achievement, worldly wealth, etc.) and eulogy virtues (kindness, generosity, helping others). david brooks’ video was useful for me because the dichotomy that it sets up relates a lot to my life purpose: i want to help others and do good (eulogy virtues) by using the things i’ve gained from my resume virtues (achievements and ambition.) to have a life in which i can both say that i had fun and say that i did good for others would be the ideal life for me, which is why it counts as one of my root beliefs. in this way i would say that i agree with the ideals of carla harris, in how she says, “number one: it is what you do for others that counts,” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris, moreau fye week five). i just add a few additional elements to what she says in her speech: i want to be able to use my ambition to forward that goal, and that i also want to make sure i value myself during the process. this is why i loved clubs that let me mentor or tutor kids back at home: it let me improve the lives of others, while also letting me improve my own life (because i love working with kids). considering this, in the future i plan to join up with some of the volunteer organizations that will let me work with kids at notre dame, so i can have the same experience here as i did back home. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 moreau integration 2 moreau integration 2 3 december 2021 new horizons through encounters in the first couple days and weeks at notre dame, not only did i feel lonely, but i also felt slightly out of place. however, as i grew into my new home, the idea of “fitting in” decreased in importance to me. i saw that as i went through my days being myself, friendship and comfort came more easily. i began to relate more to people around me and realized that mostly everyone was feeling the same way as i was. developing a community takes time and what is really important is that you stay true to yourself in the process of finding your place in a new environment. in emery bergmann’s new york times article, she says, “it was overwhelming in the most beautiful way, and was further proof that i wasn’t alone in my experience… loneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self criticism” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). she shared her experience of loneliness in her transition to college. when people feel lonely, it is common that they interpret that as a product of their own flaws. they might think that their lack of connections with people is due to the faults they see in themselves. it is important to break through that thinking pattern and to develop a more positive mindset and self-image. even when i feel lonely or disconnected, i now try to look inward for love and support instead of immediately searching for it in other people. in being kind to myself and seeking out positive interactions, i now feel at home and at peace at notre dame. throughout the semester, i have experienced setbacks that made it harder to look at things in a positive light. whether it is roommate troubles, doing badly on a test, or being https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html homesick, no one's life is always completely together. when i watched the video on kintsugi, i thought the message was very applicable to my own life. the woman says “the piece is more beautiful than having been broken” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i often ask myself why i can’t always stay on top of things or how i let myself mess up. instead of doing this, i should be focusing on how gracefully i come back from difficulties and deal with problems. the way that the people in the video used kintsugi as a sort of therapy to work through their problems can be helpful for other people to realize that everyone is struggling with something and no one's life is perfect even if it looks like it is. looking forward, i will be less hard on myself and try to see my shortcomings as something i can grow from. things being “broken” like the kintsugi does not mean that good things can come from them. another special thing about coming to notre dame was the new people i was surrounded with. i had never been so closely intertwined with people of so many different backgrounds. getting to go to school with people from all over the country and even the world has opened my eyes to the way that so many people live differently and have different cultures/traditions. in the video by the klau center archive on race, someone says, “understanding it begins with listening” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven). as someone who loves to hear what people have to say, coming to notre dame and getting to listen to so many people talk about themselves and where they come from was so exciting. through listening, i have learned so much about the people around me. something i learned is that it is always important to listen before you assume things. for example, at first, i was ignorant to the ways that international students had such a different way of coming to school than i did. when talking to some people from my moreau class, i assumed https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ that everyone was going home for christmas break. it wasn't until i listened to everyone’s winter plans that i realized that my classmates from guam and brazil maybe could not go home over the break and that i was very lucky to not have to worry about not seeing my family. even though i thought i was someone who had no problems with understanding and listening to people, i realize that i can always work to be a better listener and better understand the ways that we are all different. during week twelve of moreau, it was so interesting to see the overlap between the focus of this week and what we were learning in my foundations of theology class. in one of the readings for our qqc, it said that “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). if i had read this and had not been learning about it in theology, i would have been very confused. being asked to imitate christ seems impossible and if that is what it takes to get to heaven, it makes it sound even more difficult. however, i now see that imitating christ does not mean offering to die for the people around you or preaching to huge numbers of people. to me, being like christ is having unconditional love for everyone on earth with us. if we think about what is actually being asked of us, responding to this call is a lot more manageable. just as christ loved everyone, the same thing is asked of us. he questioned nothing and did as god told him to. our trust in god helps us to not be afraid. as we live together on earth and live in imitation to jesus, we can look forward to being reunited with god in heaven. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ beliefs i live by 1. i believe that it is important to be vulnerable at times. 2. i believe that inner virtues are more important than external successes. 3. i believe that faith is necessary to see the world as it is. 4. i believe that friendship is the truest form of expression. 5. i believe that a mindset of perseverance will allow for success, whether it be material or a learning a lesson. 6. i believe that where i’m from is an integral part of who i am. 7. i believe that though bias is inherent, people should try their best to judge the world around them on even grounds. 1. i used to not believe in being vulnerable when i was way younger. i used to be very reserved and too selective about what i shared and who i shared it with. as i got older, i expanded and had more and more moments of vulnerability, whether it be an honest moment with myself or opening up to a friend. i now enjoy being vulnerable. as i open up and am more vulnerable, i make others comfortable enough to open up as well, and i learn so much more about those around me. there are also challenges in opening up. i fully opened up to a girl that i was in a relationship with, which made the breakup much harder. something about another person knowing your weaknesses is very scary and that is the challenge of vulnerability. brene brown claims that vulnerability has a negative connotation because of the challenges that come with it but also believes that being vulnerable shows that you believe you are worthy of love and belonging. overwhelmingly, those that believe this achieve it in the end (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown – moreau fye week one). this does not imply that one needs to always be vulnerable and seemingly overshare too much. it just means that it is important to utilize it at the right times with others. throughout the last two months, i have had vulnerable moments with people i just met, which is something i never could have imagined before coming here. with time, i will become much more comfortable as i practice opening up and showing people my true self. 2. i have always been motivated by success in school, sports, and almost anything. up through most of high school, i did things for a goal of some measurable success like getting into college, getting a good grade, or getting an award. within the last year or two, i have realized that success is not meaningful to me if i am not also succeeding for a purpose that i truly care about. for example, i want to do things for the right reason, like get into a good college so i can actually grow as a person and make a difference, instead of solely for the recognizable brand name. some challenges in this development were me sometimes just wanting an achievement as a tool for something else. for example, i wanted to join finance club at my high school, just for a resume boost and not for my intellectual curiosity. david brooks talks about his eulogy virtues being more important than his resume virtues. he wants to be remembered as loving and https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 respected, not overachieved and viewed as a close friend (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). success is in no way a negative thing; however, if that success is at the expense of other valuable things, such as family life and inner morals, it is simply just not worth it to sacrifice that much. i still have a long way to go in my development because it is natural for someone to want the most successful achievements, career, or resume. i will use new skills learned on campus, especially those in moreau, to discern what i actual enjoy and try to do things for the right reason, so that i may cultivate my personal virtues. 3. as a kid, faith was very important to me. i learned to believe in things that were not exactly intuitive or provable from my parents and church like most christian kids do. i have become more skeptical in my faith, but i still maintain that it is an integral part of life that is necessary to understand the world around us and life in general. a lot of the time, it is just hard to commit to something you don’t know is true. i have struggled with my faith in the last few years, but i have realized that having faith is better than not having faith. david fagerburg claims that without faith, we are only focused on ourselves in an egotistical way. it shows us that we are nothing without the grace of god, and we must help others (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerburg – moreau fye week three). this implies that faith unveils true reality to us. everyone wants to see the world for what it actually is, so logically faith is a necessary step in this development. i am no where near perfect in my faith, but using my resources here with my theology classes, weekly masses, and religious student body in the same boat as me, i will focus on growing in my faith. 4. by the time i got to high school, i found a group of friends that i got really close with. when i was with them, i realized that being this comfortable with others allowed me to truly express my ideas and aspiration in the purest form. now, it does not have to by my best friends, but having a friend to express myself to is essential in being myself. sometimes, people are not able to express themselves in friendships because those friendships are toxic. a toxic friendship brings one or more of the members down and is not enjoyable. this is completely counterintuitive to what friendship is about. olivia taylor says that investing in a long-term friendship should leave you hopeful, positive, and joyful. if this is not the case, it could be toxic (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). taylor implies that when a friendship is not toxic, it is lifegiving and fully expressive of those involved. i will use the signs of toxic friendships i learned in this class to be cautious of falling into one of them. i want to grow true friendships while i am in college and not waste my time with a tiring toxic friendship. 5. when i first began sports, i wanted to be the best at all of them. when i finally found one i was good at (swimming), i stuck it out until the end of high school. there is no more grueling sport to persevere through, but i kept on trudging no matter how hard it got. perseverance has crossed over from sports into all aspects of my life as i have grown up, especially school. i believe this undertone of perseverance is what has gotten https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ me this far in life so far. an obvious challenge in perseverance is failure. if in the end i fail after constant perseverance, at least i can leave the situation with a knowledgeable lesson. carla harris speaks on her perseverance, and at one point in her life she was told not to apply to ivy league schools because they’re too competitive, and she still graduated summa cum laude from harvard (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). in this case, her perseverance absolutely paid off. she shook off the doubt of those around her and turned it into her fuel to achieve what she wanted. obviously, sometimes perseverance is easily seen as not worth it in the long run, but that doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t persevere most of the time. since i have come to campus, i have had to persevere week in week out to maintain my grades, working for a degree four years down the road. with the end goal so far out of reach, it seems daunting to persevere, but i will not let these doubts get the best of me in the future. 6. growing up, i never realized how important my early experiences and where i am from was to the development of who i am. since i got to school, i’ve realized that at the very least, where i grew up geographically was important. since i’m from michigan, i have had to hold up my hand to point to which part of michigan i’m from countless times. i notice different things about people based on where they’re from and their childhood experiences they’ve told me about. a challenge with this belief is finding out how similar i am with people that have had seemingly completely different upbringings. i believe that though our childhoods seem different, they are actually similar at least in our interactions with our friends and families. that is where values are cultivated, which is why i have similar values to a lot of other people. i didn’t realize how important where i’m from is until we did the week 6 “where i’m from” assignment. being able to reflect on my upbringing was a good experience because i had been so caught up in coming to school that i hadn’t taken the time to reflect in a long time. i don’t believe that our upbringing is exactly who we are, but it is a large part of what forms our behavior. i hope to be able to look back in the future and recognize my experiences here as being large parts of my past that impact who i am then. by taking each moment in and out of class to truly appreciate where i am, i will be able to diversify my experiences greatly. 7. i first realized this belief on a political level years ago, but have been able to apply it to most aspects of life since. i do not enjoy current political dichotomies because nobody is willing to concede anything once they develop a preconceived belief. this also is applicable to biases on others. if we are not exposed to as many different things as possible growing up, we will develop deep biases and opinions on things (such as stereotyping others) that are hard to revert. i was lucky enough to grow up in an area with a diverse array of people and thoughts so that i was never too entrenched in any preconceived notion. challenging this is the thought that if bias is inherent, why should i avoid it? something being natural does not make it acceptable or preferred. for example, most sinful inclinations occur naturally, and we are supposed to deter away from them. chimamanda adichie said that it is important to understand many different https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 sides to a person, or group of people (country). if we only know one side of the story, we invent untrue biases and stereotypes that are very hard to unearth (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye week 7). this implies that a life of ignorance is plagued by biases. since coming to college, i have met so many people with different ideas and backgrounds, and i have seen myself surprised by some people’s thoughts and backgrounds because of subconscious biases i had . i hope for the future, i can become more conscious of my biases throughout my experience here and at the very least try to minimize their impact of how i see those around me. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration two maria finan moreau first year experience december 3rd, 2021 learning experiences i have encountered many good and bad experiences throughout my life, but one thing that i like to take from everything is that every experience that you have is a learning opportunity. whether you learn your mistakes, or learn what you did right in order to get somewhere, there is always room for improvement. one’s response is always the most important thing, and just one wrong decision can move you in the wrong direction. one thing that i have encountered and experienced in my life is the expectations of society. no matter where you are from, where you live, or what you do, society will always expect you to act one way or another. as julia hogan said in her article, she says, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others” (“why letting go of expectation is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i think society lays huge expectations on us. when i first came here, i felt that most people were smarter than me and i am definitely someone who holds myself to higher standards than anyone else. even if it’s just a simple game of mario kart or monopoly, i want to win, as i may be a little bit over competitive. but, i had to let go in a way of this, in comparison to everyone else here. yes, i may not be the smartest person bookwise, or streetwise, but i can develop and learn overtime to become the smartest. i just need to work harder and take my time, because it will come eventually. i can’t expect to be the best at everything, and society isn’t either, i just have to be the best at whatever i do. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i have encountered people tearing relationships apart just because of a simple disagreement. in america today, the ends have never been more polar than one another, as it seems everyone thinks there is a right or wrong way to do something, and never anything in the middle. as father john asks, “can citizens of the united states learn to express their convictions in more skillful, more respectful ways?” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). in society today, we always just bury ourselves so deep into arguments sometimes that the result of them is unrepairable. alongside this, we assume that we are always right. i am not sure whether this is a pride thing within society, but nobody likes to own up to their mistakes, and in order to improve ourselves i think that this is essential to our development. and this is something that i need to work on as well, whether it is a sports game or in the classroom, it takes a lot for someone to own up to a mistake, especially in a team environment. my club soccer coach at home made me realize the truth behind that when we make mistakes all we can do is be accountable for them, and learn from them going forward and forget it ever happened. i have encountered many communities that just have built naturally over time, that i am blessed to have and be a part of. in his article, parker j palmer says, “this simple fact has critical implications: community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j palmer moreau fye week eleven). especially in america today, people expect people on opposite ends of the spectrum, politically, economically, whatever it may be, to get along just like that. yes, we do need to come together as a community, but that cannot be forced to happen, it needs to occur naturally. for me, the biggest example of this was my club soccer team. i joined a team where i knew nobody, economically i was much better off than the majority of my teammates, and i was one of the only white kids in the https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ program, most kids being hispanic. yes, in the beginning it was frustrating, most of them being on the team and relating in ways i couldn’t, but over time it formed a family environment. it took time for that to happen, which included getting rid of toxic players, but it’s okay for something like that to take time, because it does, and it really is special and a gift like parker said. i have encountered things that challenge my faith, education and physical ability, but those struggles are what make me complete. in the booklet relating to christian education, father james says “education is the art of helping young people to completeness. for the christian, this means that education is helping a young person to be more like christ, the model for all christians” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). i came from a high school that was episcopalian, and i think that it was a great education following christian faith. i was challenged academically, but also as being a good person in this world. all these encounters and challenges in my life are what build me into the man i am today, and i think that becoming a good person is an encounter you should have at every second of your life. whether you’re on the sports field or in the classroom, there is always a way to be better. overall what is one thing that i have encountered the most in my life? question. there is a question whether i am capable of doing something, a question about where my life is headed, and the only way i will finally be able to answer that question one day is learning through my experiences every single day. the ups and downs of life are what make life worth living, and there are always ways to make a bad situation into something that can be useful for your life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186731?module_item_id=103503 instructor brian reaume moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 responding to reality throughout this first semester moreau course, i have been challenged to think about how experiences from my life have shaped the way i perceive myself and society, with regard to dissonance, brokenness, hope, community, and hope. consequently, i have been more easily able to delineate some of my beliefs, while others have become more cloudy. ultimately, i strive to use this contemplation to have a greater understanding about myself and be more intentional about how i spend my time. one way that my growth has been facilitated by moreau this semester can be exemplified by the way i perceive my accomplishments—more specifically, i no longer fall susceptible to feelings of impostor syndrome. in short, impostor syndrome is an internal feeling that many students experience wherein they don’t believe their success is warranted or attributable to their own efforts. admittedly, this is something that i have struggled with in the past. for instance, upon being accepted to notre dame and enrolling here, i soon came to realize how intelligent and hardworking my peers are. consequently, feelings of inadequacy began to emerge, which can be discouraging and makes it seem as though i am fighting an uphill battle. however, i was seemingly comforted to know that i was not alone in this feeling. in week nine of moreau, many of my peers expressed their worries that they didn’t think they were doing enough. elizabeth cox described this phenomenon perfectly: “the most surefire way to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it. many people suffering from imposter syndrome are afraid that if they ask about their performance, their fears will be confirmed” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). thus, by discussing the way that i perceived myself and what i have actually accomplished, i have been able to mitigate feelings of impostor syndrome. this has and will be conducive to my growth as i my mind isn’t filled with fears that i haven’t done enough to be in the position i am in, which eliminates the ongoing internal and external dissonance that i was experiencing. moreover, with this unjustified stressor removed from my life, i feel as though i would be less hesitant to pursue something i am interested in. essentially, my thoughts that were previously clouded by feelings of inadequacy have been shaped to a more optimistic and realistic outlook. while i have gained clarity in some aspects of my life, others seem more complicated upon reflection. in today’s political climate, it seems as though opinions have never been more polarized. even here on campus, i have seen how people can become so passionate about their beliefs to the point that they no longer see the person behind the opinion, and thus they believe they are incompatible with those who have differing perspectives. this rang true when a student published an article in the irish rover detailing the ways in which, in her opinion, the university of notre dame was contradicting its roots to catholicism. for some, this sentiment was well-perceived as it fit their preconceived notions of how the university should act. for others, they became outraged that such an article was allowed to be published and began attacking the writer’s character. it can be difficult to see how common ground might ever be reached. notre dame’s very own father jenkins expressed his view on how hatred is a complicated matter, stating, “we can have the most sophisticated constitution, a brilliant system of checks and balances, and a bill of rights to safeguard against the tyranny of the majority—yet none of it can stand against the power of hatred” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). in notre dame’s case, we can have amazing residential halls and courses meant to unite the student body, but none of that matters if students develop animosity for their peers with different beliefs. while it might be easy to simply say that everyone should be open-minded and accepting of others’ views, the fact is that some people will never be able to dissociate someone’s opinion from their character, which paves way for hatred. one of my god and the good life dialogue leaders, who was anticipating controversial opinions, said something that i think is a brilliant way to address incongruity between people’s beliefs: “names stay, ideas leave.” not only does this allow for discussion of ideas in an appropriate setting, but it preserves the reputation of students once the discussion has concluded. however, while this certainly sounds like the correct approach to contrasting perspectives, it is in our nature to attach people’s ideas to their being. personally, i am going to strive to see my peers for more than just a single idea that i may not agree with—doing the opposite would be to know a single story, a concept touched upon earlier in moreau. now that i have come to know that absolving our campus—and the world—of hatred is much more nuanced than i initially thought, it is in my best interest to identify a solution that works best for me, and that is to love my peers unconditionally. although the ever-present sense of hatred seems apparent in our day-to-day lives, it is paramount that we continue to get to know our neighbors, for community is undoubtedly the most important catalyst to a good life. the idea of community is especially personal to me because it is something that i thought i would lack upon coming to notre dame. when dorm assignments were announced back in july, i didn’t know what to think of pangborn, so i reached out to a sophomore friend of mine to hear his thoughts. without hesitation, he told me that he was sorry, as pangborn was apparently considered one of the worst dorms on campus. i was disappointed to say the least. i thought about how unfair it was that some of my friends had been assigned to storied dorms, like siegfried or alumni, which were deeply rooted in tradition, whereas i would be assigned to a dorm that had not housed men since the 90s. to me, these dorms would allow residents to build a community much quicker as they had upperclassmen and orchestrated all sorts of events throughout the year. however, i can now say that i am grateful to have been assigned to pangborn, where i have formed some of the best friendships i will ever have. it didn’t require traditions or upperclassmen paving the way; rather, the relationships came naturally, with a community that was built and strengthened by the fact that we were placed in a dorm with a blank slate. parker palmer stated, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received,” which i think wonderfully depicts the message i am trying to communicate (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). instead of attempting to artificially construct a community, i now know to let it grow naturally, with the main focus of appreciating the people brought into my life. i am eager to receive the gift of community next semester, where i will be brought together with people in new classes and opportunities. while i have been posed with many challenges this semester, perhaps one of the most important is how i maintain hope. to me, hope is the idea that something good will happen in my life in the future. however, that doesn’t mean that i can just waltz into good fortune blindly. instead, i recognize that i must continue to grow, which requires putting myself into situations that might feel uncomfortable at first. for instance, one of the most challenging things i’ve done this semester is beginning to network with professionals in finance. i find networking rather nerve-wracking because although i use it to gain knowledge about a field and develop myself professionally, there is such a huge knowledge gap between myself and the person i am speaking to, which makes me hesitant to say something that i think might sound dumb. nonetheless, i have been successful in what i sought out to accomplish, which was to gain more exposure to the finance industry. campus ministry eloquently described this experience of putting oneself in uncomfortable situations as having “sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). when putting myself out there to network and in other first-time experiences, i have learned that it is more than acceptable to go in without knowing anything. the important part is that i maintain hope that it will be conducive to my growth and that i come out having learned something. i hope to maintain this mindset as i continue through my undergraduate studies and allow myself to experience what is unknown to me. after spending nearly a semester at notre dame, i have been faced with difficult questions and had to evaluate what is most important to me. ultimately, i have deduced that leaning on my community and living in hope are some of the most important aspects of my life. i am excited to see how this next semester plays out and find out what else can be applied to my life. continuing to grow one of the important questions i have been asking myself through my time here has been “do i fit in?” ever since i got here i have been asking myself this question. going to notre dame has truly made me step out of my comfort zone. first, i have spent most of my life in manila, philippines, although there are some similarities with the culture given that we were colonized by the united states, the culture is still very different and it has been quite difficult to adjust. although i believe that with globalization, i have had access to many different movies and shows that have allowed me to understand american culture as well as my dad growing up in the us and having a lot of family here that i have been able to visit, i feel like i had a grasp of how it would be like here. though i believe that it has still not been exactly the same as what i expected. i didn’t really ever know what it was like to be a minority. i was also very unsure if i even deserve to be here. i was very surprised when i got the acceptance letter to notre dame. i was not sure if i truly deserved to be accepted here. the week 9 material gave me clarity and helped me realize that what i was feeling was imposter syndrome--something i wasn’t very sure of before. “intense feelings of imposterism can prevent people from sharing their great ideas or applying for jobs and programs where they would excel...at least so far, the most surefire way to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it...you can combat your own imposter syndrome by collecting and revisiting positive feedback.” (“what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox, ted-ed moreau fye week 9) i feel like positive feedback is very important here such that we understand that there are reasons why we receive these rewards and we should not put ourselves down simply because we think other people are better than us. i feel like social media is one of the things that really brings us down. because we see everyone posting their accomplishments on social media and showing that they are happy and living a “good life” we tend to feel bad about ourselves. we often compare ourselves to others--but not even a realistic version of others but an unrealistic version of them--the version of them that they present on social media. if we do not compare ourselves with others i realized that there are some ways that social media can actually be beneficial. for instance with emery bergmann who said “i had students from all over the country reach out to me and express their experiences, thanking me for making them feel less alone. administrators from various universities wrote to me asking for permission to show the video to their freshman class.” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann, ny times moreau fye week 9) social media is one of the ways that we can realize that we are not alone in this imposter syndrome. i believe that another way is to talk to others about it and to reflect. i have tried to decrease my social media use but i still use it often because it is one of the ways that i can connect with my friends who are back home in manila--which i am very thankful for. but i realized that i should not compare myself with others as much on social media because i know that it is unrealistic. i have also placed much less importance on my social media accounts following which was something put too much importance on before because i felt insecure about it. given that i am a minority ethnic group, i have also been questioning the way that living in america is different for different groups of people. i feel like it is very wrong that the system works this way. according to christopher j. devron, sj, “known in c.s.t. as imago dei, it holds that each human person is created in the likeness and image of god and is therefore deserving of dignity and respect.” ("should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j., america magazine moreau fye week 10) knowing that we are all equal, why then do people get treated differently just because of their skin color. i am really happy that this was one of the readings that was given for moreau. i feel like it is very important for people to realize the privileges that we have and try our best to move towards a more equal and just society. i feel like it is also very important for people to educate themselves outside of school about various issues. with social media, fake news is one of the biggest issues today. some people post things on social media without fact checking and their friends may blindly believe it. with research we are able to figure out the truth and also spread the truth to others. it is also important to be aware of history and the way things came to be. for instance, race itself is a social construct. according to prof. fuentes, “‘race’ as we use the term and classification is not a reflection of biological groups. therefore patterned differences that occur between what we call ‘races’ are not caused by inherent biological differences in these ‘races.’ they are due to social, historical, political, economic and experiential contexts and are changeable.” (“diversity matters” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11) other than the teachings of the church, there is also no rational, scientific reason that we should be treating others differently based on something as trivial as the color of their skin. furthermore, i believe that it is important to have a very diverse network of people. “exposure and access to different viewpoints and life experiences offers insight and changes biases.” (diversity matters, prof. agustin fuentes, moreau fye week 11) i am trying to meet as many people as i can to understand as many different backgrounds as possible and try to become a less biased person. it is not good to judge a book by its cover--i think i need to get to know people better and build solid relationships with others. i used to believe that punishment was just black and white, those who break the law should be punished but given that there is even systemic discrimination i believe that we should thoroughly examine the criminal justice system and the government as a whole such that this inequality is removed such that everyone regardless of how we look can live in this country and this world equally. “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus. it was for moreau “a treasure more valuable than gold and precious stones.” (cl, 34) in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope. moreau’s trust in the cross is the essential component of his legacy, and its influence can be found in the final section of the congregation’s constitutions, written more than a century after his death: we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift. (8:118)” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c., moreau fye week 12) i believe that hope is something that is very important for each and every one of us and is not something that is unique to christianity. the second half of this semester has been full of ups and downs. i have made quite a good amount of new friends and became closer to the friends that i have already made. unfortunately, because i didn’t book a flight early to visit my family in new york early enough for thanksgiving, the prices went up and i had to stay here for the holiday. though i am happy that i am able to spend this time with my friends who stayed here as we celebrated thanksgiving in the fisher basement, as we cooked up ramen noodles. i am thankful that our rector cooked us mac and cheese and chicken nuggets and we had a little thanksgiving feast. looking back at the second half of the semester so far, i struggled a little more with my classes than i did in the beginning. i had a hard time as the content got more difficult and didn’t do very well in one of my exams. but i know that struggling can help me learn. i believe it is very important to learn from my mistakes so i can do better in the future. i feel that without hardship, without suffering, you would not be able to fully appreciate life. because if your entire life is sunshine and rainbows, you won't really know when you're happy, and you won't truly comprehend what the good times are. adversity teaches us to appreciate the good times while also making us stronger people capable of facing any obstacle that comes our way. the thought that jesus is our only source of hope struck me as quite compelling. on the cross, jesus gave his life for us; he carried the cross, knowing that it would be the place where he would be crucified. we all have our own challenges nowadays, whether it's with money, school, employment, or relationships. we must recognize that jesus is there to assist us in carrying our crosses and that he will see us through. therefore i believe that i should never give up. gottemoller professor whittington moreau fye64 15 october 2021 finding meaning: a first-year reflection i believe that i am searching for something or someone that will make my life meaningful. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being completely vulnerable with others. i believe that i improve myself by identifying my weaknesses and working to eliminate them. i believe that i form healthy relationships by creating boundaries. i believe that my community should be loving, encouraging, and nourishing. i believe that i grow by understanding and embracing where i come from. i believe that i pursue truth by letting others tell their stories. at the heart of my notre dame journey has been a desire to find meaning. when i look around me on campus, i find that i am surrounded by people who have found meaning in their major, clubs, career, or religion. as a catholic institution, notre dame finds meaning in the bond of faith and love which stems from this identity. it is this faith that at one time put notre dame on the bottom of my college list, but i now realise that without my faith, life is bleak and meaningless. before coming to notre dame, my faith could easily have been described as a “religious duty” to be dispatched on a sunday morning; some place disconnected from our daily life.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerbergmoreau fye week three) during my first week on campus, i found myself choosing to attend a weekly mass and enjoying it. during the last few weeks, i have enjoyed attending different masses and engaging with the community of catholic students on campus. i have discovered that my faith has always guided me and given my life meaning and that it continues to do so. through the help of the catholic community here, i can confidently say that i have found something that gives my life meaning. being vulnerable has always been very difficult for me because it involves trusting that another person will acknowledge and respect your vulnerability. allowing someone to witness my weaknesses and knowing that they will not judge me for them seems completely impossible, but i know that the only way to forge authentic life-giving relationships is to be vulnerable. if one sentence captures my approach to vulnerability it would be this: “i’m going to totally deconstruct shame. i’m going to understand how vulnerability works and i’m going to outsmart it.” (“the power of vulnerability” by dr. brene brownmoreau fye week one) i now know that deconstructing shame and completely understanding vulnerability is impossible, but somehow i must learn how to enact dr. brown’s wisdom in my life. self-improvement and introspection are difficult tasks for me, but at certain times in my life i have been forced to do a lot of both. college has been one of those times. my process of introspection is described perfectly by david brooks as this: “you find your signature sin, out of which your other sins emerge and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week two) this processthough long and painfulhas guided me through some of my most difficult situations and i trust that it will be a useful tool as i approach complex relationships throughout my college journey. during my brief experience of college, i have found myself saying things such as “because i love you, tonight is awesome!” (“because i love you whiskey” by joinonelovemoreau fye week four) statements like these come easily to me because i don’t like confrontations and i prefer doing something that i don’t want to do than to “cause a scene.” creating priorities on campus and deciding what activities i have the physical, mental, and social stamina for has been difficult at times. learning to kindly tell a friend that i can’t hang out because i have homework has challenged me, but by creating simple boundaries such as this, i hope to prepare myself to stand my ground in more difficult situations. fr. sorin provides the best example of a loving, encouraging, and nurturing community throughout his correspondence with fr. moreau. in one letter, he exclaims, “oh! may the lord multiply you and make you abound in charity towards one another and towards all men, as we do also towards you.”(“sorin letter to moreau” by fr. sorinmoreau fye week five) by following the example of fr. sorin and employing the gift of christian charity, i believe that i can build a community which is nourishing to all its members. “i am from those momentssnapped before i budded leaf-fall from the family tree.” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyonmoreau fye week six) much like gerge lyon, i too take pride in my family and identify myself with them and the memories i have created with them. that being said, i have now found that for the first time, i have the ability to do whatever i want and more importantly be whoever i want. the enormity of this change was initially completely overwhelming, but as i have had time to adjust to being independent, i have learned to embrace who i am as an individual outside of my family's identity. i have always taken pride in being someone who shakes people’s biases and expectations. whether it is the way i dress, speak, or act, i am intimately familiar with the feeling of exposing the single stories of others. that being said, i am still surprised when others manage to shake my expectations and biases and this campus has given me opportunities to witness that several times. chimamanda ngozi adichie notes that biases are created when you “show a people as one thing over and over again and that is what they become.” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week seven) my eagerness to tell my story and be heard has sometimes silenced the stories of others, but i know that to pursue truth, i need to let others tell me their story. david michael jefferson october 11, 2021 moreau first-year experience professor hnatusko my journey through self reflection and beliefs the question we are supposed to answer in the paper is simply ‘what do i believe?’. for the first weeks of college we were able to take a break from the normal college class, and take a class simply based on self-knowledge and personal growth. moreau first year experience didn’t really follow the format of a class, as we often participated in group discussions about self-knowledge and recognition. each week we looked at a different aspect of personal reflection and growth and reflected on this topic. the question ‘what do i believe?’ seems like a broad question, but when broken down into the eight weeks of reflection we did on different topics it gets simpler. personal beliefs stem from what is known as root beliefs, which ask the question of why you believe something. i believe that root beliefs are essential to personal reflection and growth. a root belief statement that i dove deep into was me stating that i believe i grow from peer review and help. from my time at notre dame i have experienced the deep level of resources, notre dame provides for you to be successful. i think that those available resources workes perfectly for me because i feel i become a better learner from resource help. for example, i am taking a one-credit writing course that is focused on looking at my writing for other courses and helping me become a better writer. i also am taking full advantage of tutors and ta’s that are available to help me in times of need. in middle and high school it was easy for my pride to take over and to try and do everything myself solely on the belief of wanting to be independent. but after realizing that i grow from taking advantage of resources and help, i let myself take advantage of others trying to help me. another root belief statement that i took interest in is i believe my purpose is to better myself as a student-athlete and to take advantage of notre dame as an experience. when i say that i mean my purpose at notre dame, not in life. the first aspect is to better myself as a student-athlete. i have never really been a true student before, meaning my high school experience was shaped by athletics. part of the reason i chose notre dame was because i knew it would give me the opportunity to become a well-rounded student-athlete. meaning i would not be too focused on academics or on athletics. going to a big sec school i felt i would fall back into my old ways of not caring about school, but just on the athletic side of my life. the second part is my purpose to take advantage of notre dame as an experience. coming from washington dc, i have never really experienced life outside of the east coast. also, notre dame is a very religious place, so taking in that experience to deepen my faith i feel will turn me into a well-rounded person. a challenge of that belief is taking the notre dame experience as a whole, not just bits and pieces. as an athlete, it is easy for me to close myself off to campus life, dorm activities, meeting new people, and/or taking the time to meet people outside of my dorm. but me knowing that my purpose in coming here is to take in the notre dame experience as a whole, i will not let any of those things slip by me. over the past eight weeks, each moreau class has been a different aspect of identifying ways to self-evaluate, self-assess, and internally reflect. the first week we looked at the question "in what ways may courage, vulnerability, and belonging be a part of my search?" we looked at a video on the topic and the video stated, “that connection is why we are here, it's what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) connections and interactions with other people are what fuel our lives and our ability to live the way we do. no matter what aspect of life you focus on, there is some sort of human connection. in my opinion, developing relationships and connections and being able to develop technology is what differentiates us from the animal kingdom. these human connections have allowed us to grow and develop as a human race and are part of the reason why humans have evolved into the dominant species on the planet. dr. brown also explains the role human connections play in our lives and the power of being vulnerable. dr. brown then goes on to highlight the importance of having the courage to be imperfect. in order to truly be yourself and to be vulnerable, you have to be able to fully embrace yourself and vulnerability. loving yourself is the first step in human growth, and personally, i one hundred percent agree. for the first four weeks, we looked at each question that started with the phrase “searching for”. the focus question for the second session was "how can i grow as my most authentic self?". because of this focus question i really tried to focus more on the survey than the video (via character strengths surveymoreau fye week two). i think self-reflection and your own intuition would help one become their true self. it was interesting to do the self-reflection survey and see what areas i am stronger in and areas i was lacking in like knowledge, wisdom, and integrity. one thing that i did really like was when the speaker in the ted talk ( video: “the role of faith in our story” (fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c., moreau week 2), talked about how to build depth in character. he highlighted the importance of looking back into one's past and self-reflecting on a moment of shame. this allows for the personal growth of your true self and will help you build depth. the third and fourth weeks both dealt with building relationships and the framework of those relationships. in week three, the integration of faith and smart decision-making really struck home with me, because that is something that needs to play a factor in building relationships. the moral aspect of building relationships transitioned straight into week four in the discussion of bystanders and forming giving relationships. in the text, (text: "5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (olivia t. taylor, grotto, moreau fye week 4), grotto says “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term. think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend. the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” i agree with this statement fully and try to implement this when i judge if my friends are truly my friends. one thing i disagree with is leaving with a smile on your face. i disagree because with your true closest friends you should feel comfortable enough to feel uncomfortable. you should be able to challenge each other and call your friend out on their bs even if that makes one upset. but then at the end of the day be able to look back, smile, and realize that your friend had your best interest at heart. for weeks 5-8, the discussion phrases all started with the word “identifying”. off the bat, you can tell these weeks are focused on reflection. the focus question for week 5 is: "in what ways do stories shape my journey?" i believe that this is a very good question and the amount stories that impact one’s life differs from person to person. stories that directly relate to a person and how they would live their life, shape their journey and character immensely. for example stories on african american history directly relate to me and my viewpoints. i think it is very important to take stories into account when forming viewpoints and opinions. the next week we looked at a poetry assignment, that depicted where you were from and the influences that shaped you into the person you are today. on that assignment, the founder says “people have used it at their family reunions, teachers have used it with kids all over the united states, in ecuador and china; they have taken it to girls in juvenile detention, to men in prison for life, and to refugees in a camp in sudan.” (text: "where i'm from" (george ella lyon), moreau fye week 6) i think this is a really cool and embracive movement. hearing that a poem prompt has traveled all across the world is almost breathtaking. also, it's just simple as where you are from, so people can put their own spin on it but it always relates back to your identity. lastly, in week 7, we looked at people’s ability to pursue truths and biases that would be formed when coming to those conclusions. in the text (text: “how to think about ‘implicit bias’” (keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american), moreau fye week 7), the author says today managers are unlikely to announce that white job applicants should be chosen over black applicants, and physicians don’t declare that black people feel less pain than whites. yet the widespread pattern of discrimination and disparities seen in field studies persists. it bears a much closer resemblance to the widespread stereotypical thoughts seen on implicit bias tests than to the survey studies in which most people present themselves as unbiased.” at the beginning of the text, it also states that biases don’t mean you have any sexist, racist, or “whateverist” implications. i would disagree with this statement partially. the direct person might not have any bad thoughts, but it has been implemented in their brain to think this way over years of oppression. using race and the quotation above is a great example. in no way is that manager racist, but culturally over the years, they have been “trained” to think the way of the example. it sucks but that is just how society is. every module had one main thing in common, it was rooted in the premise of self-reflection. in college, i feel it is really easy to get sucked into just being a robot who is fixated on doing well in school and getting good grades. moreau first experienced gives students the ability to take a step back from that, and self-reflect on items that will essentially help them in their college journey. notre dame and me: the next chapter in my life the university of notre dame. before i came here, i assumed that it would be a university like any other, that i would simply be coming here to learn about the nuances of my major, to eventually become a great doctor. however, what actually awaited me was more interesting than that. not only was i learning more about biochemistry, i was learning more about who i am. who do i strive to be in the future? what are my core values? i don’t quite have the full answers to these questions yet, but i’ve made great strides towards answering them during my time here at notre dame. throughout my life, i’ve struggled with my concept of self. who should i be? do i live up to those standards? what should i be doing differently? these questions have plagued me for years. i remember one particular moment during a math competition that i participated in when i was in middle school – it was my third year participating, and given that i had made the state level of competition every year before, i didn’t expect to run into any problems on the way there. unfortunately, i didn’t make it, which absolutely crushed me. for my whole life, i believed that i was above average in math skill. to me, my defeat clearly meant that i had declined, and that i was no longer the math superstar that i thought i was. this realization devastated me, and thus began my journey to find out what i should try to be like. eventually, i stumbled upon the realization that my “downfall” really only came about because of my expectations – i fully expected to reach the state level of competition, and i fully expected to dominate everyone else at the competition. as julia hogan puts it, “these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). i continued to struggle with expectations throughout high https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau school, whether it be about making it onto the varsity team for our science olympiad competitions, or keeping my gpa high enough. however, i’ve come to realize that rather than trying to be the perfect person, i should just focus on bettering myself little by little every day. rather than trying to get so good at math that i can beat everyone else at competitions, i instead try to focus on learning new concepts and tackling challenging problems. this change in mindset transformed me for the better, and i hope to continue employing it in the future. in the summer of 2020, the killing of george floyd sparked outrage and protest across the nation, under the rallying cry of “black lives matter.” at the time, i was about to begin my senior year of high school, in the midst of the coronavirus pandemic. i had been stuck at home for a few months at that point, and i constantly felt that i was about to combust from all the pressure that i was going through, with my family, my college applications, and my schoolwork. the major news headlines of the time did nothing to soothe me – rather, i felt even more hopeless. how was i supposed to be able to help the world in any capacity, when i was struggling with all that was expected of me already? over time, i’ve begun to formulate an answer to this question too. rather than trying to help the world, i needed to help myself first. i realized that it was far more productive to try and do good for the world when i was in tip-top condition, rather than when i was suffering from stress and anxiety. furthermore, it’s a daunting task to try and simply solve the world’s problems in one fell swoop. it’s simply impossible for one person to do. rather, i’ve learned to focus on my own life – what can i do to better the lives of others in my own life? i think a large portion of the problems the world faces can be solved in one way or another simply by strengthening the bonds between people. as father jenkins put it, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ fye week ten). i believe that simply by treating others with respect, and trying to help others with their problems whenever i can, i can do my part to making this world a better place. when i get into a situation where i’m more able, perhaps i can even help tackle some of the bigger problems that the world faces. throughout my life, i’ve been no stranger to community, and i’ve been thankful for that. the communities that i’ve been a part of have helped shape me, and have allowed me to achieve my full potential. whether it be my friends from the science olympiad team in middle school, or the kids i played minecraft with in high school, they always had my back when i needed it, and in return, i did my best to help them when they needed it. what i’ve learned throughout my life can be summarized in this quote by parker palmer: “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). i’ve found that i tend to form the tightest bonds with people when i meet them by chance, when i’m just doing what i like doing. as the quote says, community isn’t something that can really be forced – it develops over time, as you grow closer to a group of people. here at notre dame, i’ve also found that community can be very rewarding. my dorm recently put on a mental health night, which i attended. i got to listen to the stories of some of the students, and after hearing from them i became acutely aware of the mental health struggles that my fellow students were going through. hearing the perspectives of others is always important, and through the communities that we’re a part of, we can expose ourselves to the successes and struggles of the world. hope can be a magical thing. all you need is a little bit to give you the strength you need to get out of a tough situation, or to accomplish a tricky goal. whenever i help others who are struggling with something, i focus on trying to give them hope, so that they can attain their goals http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ too. for example, when i tutored students in math during high school, rather than simply showing them the correct method to solve the problem, i focused on helping them understand why the methods we used to solve the problems worked, so that they could apply the methods in other problems much easier. this quote resonated with me in particular: “and, as in every work of our mission, we find that we ourselves stand to learn much from those whom we are called to teach” (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c – moreau fye week twelve). indeed, in spreading my knowledge to others, i gain hope at seeing them apply the concepts on their own and succeed. it’s a two-way exchange. since arriving at notre dame, i’ve learned a lot about my beliefs, values, and motivations. with a more concrete sense of self, i hope to help change the world for the better using what i’ve learned here. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471?module_item_id=109281 life from across the ocean growing up across the ocean meant that the outcome and process of life would be different than those who grew up on this side of the ocean. this could mean that i would have harder time adjusting to a new environment, or it could mean that i can bring a new perspective to those on this side of the ocean. growing up in china, that phrase, could mean so much to so many different people. the common stereotypes, the common misconceptions, the negative thoughts, they’re all there. but there are quite a few that accepts that this is who you are, accepts that you are from another place and at our cores we are all american, and most importantly that we are all human. yet, the ones that stick out are those who can’t accept who you are because of the way you look. yes, i am not the typical white, that is common to most here, but i am still human. i am 6 feet tall, with a pretty strong build, i grew up playing basketball at a national level, and won badminton in the asia pacific region. i am just as athletic as most of the people here, but why not pass to me on the court, why not pick me earlier to join your team? oh, i get it, it’s because i look different. and that’s why i am here. “what you realize is that connection is why we’re here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives, this is what it’s all about.” ( “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1) i believe i am responsible, along with everyone out there, to show that just because we look different, does not mean that i am any less talented or smart than you; and definitely do not call my people poor, because that is where i can shock you (via institute on character adult survey – moreau fye week 2). yes, i grew up in china, but that does not mean that i am uncultured. i grew up in an international school, i can speak english better than most people here, and no that does not mean that we had special teachers that taught us how to pronounce these words. i grew up with american teachers, learning the same ap material as people did here. got 5’s on most of them too. okay, i am now done proving a point that we should be equal. but i still deal with racism, i guess this is how society is, but that does not mean that this is how it has to be the entire time (searching for framework – moreau fye week 3). having this class of moreau is honestly a blessing. i am the only asian in the class, but that is not the blessing i am talking about. i am talking about how i have the opportunity to voice. my opinions freely, and really tell the story of my life. i love telling my story, but moreover, i like listening to other people telling their story. i love listening to other people’s stories because they are just as important as my own. and definitely, the point isn’t to compare our lives, but rather to gain another perspective, and to learn more about other people and their stories. especially since i grew up in a rather traditional chinese family household, where the expectation for grades were a’s and unlimited amounts of extracurriculars to seem that i have all the soft and hard skills, my roots are formed around them. like i’ve stated in previous qqcs my grandparents are a big part of my roots (where i’m from – moreau fye week 6). they did not grow up wealthy, they grew up in poverty, so achieving outstanding grades and being super athletic and well-built was just unheard of. this is why i value them so much, they taught me that the way to i’ve a life is to be happy, and learn how to be happy and healthy. because at the end of the day, to them, if you can live a healthy and happy life, then you have accomplished the most important task that most people nowadays cannot complete. that’s why they kept on emphasizing that the ranking of important things in life goes: 1) health, 2) education, 3) everything else. (searching for lifegiving relationships – moreau fye week 4) those are the three principles i grew up on. but these three principles are not what my parents wanted me to have; especially my dad. even though my dad would always say that he also has the same principles in that order of ranking. but in reality, it was always: 1) education, 2) health, 3) everything else. these are the principles that he made sure i knew that he wanted. so, when i couldn’t satisfy my grades, and actually get the good grade, he would often sacrifice my healthy – mentally. this is where the parts of my mom, my grandparents, and my brother came in. but in particular, i want to talk about my brother and the impact he had on me. my brother was honestly a big reason of why i am who i am today. my parents, were what you could call “tiger parents”, and my brother knew exactly what to do when situations get rough. he is 5 and a half years older than me so he has been through everything that i am now currently going through. (identifying narratives – moreau fye week 5) both my junior and senior year of high school, i was struggling hard. junior year with all the aps i took, and then senior year with all the applications i had to do. my dad would always give me a hard time and push me to the edge. but my brother was always there for me. he was not as strict as my dad, as he also valued health and being happy over destroying yourself with education. he was the person that helped me through the thick and the thins. these are my roots from across the ocean. as you can see, it isn’t much different, is it? maybe the educational rigor that my parents had for me were way harder than one may have in the us, but everything else still turned out to be pretty similar. i ended up at notre dame, i am capable of competing in athletics at the highest level. i’m a hesburgh-yusko scholar, along with a greater china scholar. i am capable, so don’t ever look at me, or anyone who looks like me – differently (identifying perspective – moreau fye week 7). carving my own path            i have learned and encountered a lot throughout my first semester at the university of notre dame, but what stands out the most is the need to carve my own path. i have come to understand the importance of focusing on myself and not comparing myself to others. whether it be grades, number of friends, body image, or overall well-being, you never really know people’s experiences, past, goals, motives, or struggles. for me, comparison only leads to letdown, lack of confidence, and feelings of unworthiness. over these past three months, by working through some significant ups and downs, i have become autonomous and am eagerly facilitating my future without the pressures of comparison.            in week nine, we talked about first-year students encountering dissonance and discomfort as well as the danger of expectations. julia hogan said, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life.” i agree with this statement because successes and goals should come from yourself, not others or society. one should not feel like they must conform or please others to be their best (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). at the beginning of the semester, i will admit, this was something i constantly did. i thought i was going to be one of the “stupider” students and need to work much harder than everyone else just to do as well or even worse than my peers. i thought if i did not do as well in school as i did in high school (straight as), i would let my parents and grandparents down. luckily, i proved myself wrong and realized that while i work extremely hard, i work just as hard as many of my peers and am doing very well. i set new expectations for myself as it is a different world that requires refined expectations. i also came to understand that my parents will be proud of my best work, whether that is an a or a c. my overall academic confidence has grown tremendously as i have proven to myself that i can do it. while college is undoubtedly a lot of work, i enjoy the challenge and am learning how to navigate what works and what doesn’t. goals are crucial for self-growth and learning how to be hard on yourself for improvement but not too hard to the point of breaking down.            something i have continually been asking myself lately is, “who do i want to become intellectually, and what do i want to do with my life after college?” little by little, i have started to answer this question as i dive deeper into my academic journey at notre dame. as a psychology major, my introduction to psychology course has been incredibly eye-opening for me. it had provided me with the opportunity to narrow down what path i want to pursue. with two very different professors teaching various types of the field, i think the developmental, personality, mental disorders, and self sections of psychology are what i am most interested in. i feel that it is my calling to help people and work in a constantly changing environment. in addition to further self-discovery in my major, i have declared a minor in catholic social traditions (cst). it works to create a newfound thought process towards racial injustices made me very excited that people are recognizing and paying attention to it. i never want to be a reason someone feels like they have been mistreated and always want to be sensitive to people different from me, whether that be racially, socioeconomically, culturally, etc. i feel like this minor will help me grow to be my best self and be a great advocate for the need for change and how to accomplish it. (should catholic schools teach critical race theory? by christopher j. devron, s.j. – moreau fye week ten).                        in the midst of rigorous academic work, i have also been balancing my spiritual, social, and extracurricular lives. i am constantly striving to become the most complete and well-rounded person possible. while creating a new life for myself at college, all of this has been incredible but not always easy. when figuring out who i want my friends to be and who i want to associate with, i often ask myself, “am i being my most authentic self?” or “is this a balanced relationship?” i never thought about these questions at home because my friends were somewhat the same throughout school, and i did not have the chance to start over and pick all new friends. in this process, i know i need to make sure that i always stay true to myself and my morals. furthermore, as it is much more available at notre dame than it ever was at home, my spiritual life has become much more prominent. i attend mass twice a week and have become part of a bible study as well. “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship to heaven.” i find this quote powerful because i have never thought of walking through life with christ alongside me as completeness. but, thinking about it in these terms, that is precisely what it is. while walking with christ and striving to live out his ways and teachings, i am slowly becoming the most complete human i can be (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve).            after adopting this new college lifestyle, it is clear to me that i belong at notre dame. i feel that i can keep up with the academic work, thrive in a social setting, deepen my spiritual life, and become the best version of myself. over the course of the first semester, i have learned the significance of making time for the things that are truly important and enhance your well-being. for me, that is schoolwork, club soccer, mass/bible study, and a few relationships that bring out the best in me. in addition to this, i also now understand how essential it is for me to use resources and support system. when things are not going smoothly, it is okay to ask for help and remember that i am never alone in the journey of life. in week eleven of moreau fye, we read “thirteen ways of looking at community,” and parker j. palmer wrote, “but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” i have come to know who is genuinely there for me and who i find comfort in and trust. whether it be my mom, dad, therapist, or best friend from home, i know how important it is to use them in good times and bad. when i try to rely on myself and keep pushing through alone, nothing usually changes and sometimes even gets worse. integration 4 lmachion ryan retartha moreau fye: integration 4 28 april 2022 life’s meaning is what you give it the question of how to live a well-lived life is one that stretches over one’s whole life. some smaller qualities of a well-lived life may change with time, the core values should remain the same. however, making a roadmap of values and qualities of a well-lived life through the moreau first-year experience course is a great opportunity to reflect on what one truly values early on in his or her college career. as i think about what i value in my life, my faith makes the top of the list. in fr. himes’ article, he references st. augustine’s quote: “a human being is one whose heart is restless until it rests in god.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3) no matter what we accomplish, we cannot be truly fulfilled without god. distractions can keep us from living well-lived lives. “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length, so that i can more easily remember who i am.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week 1) in my opinion, one of the easiest ways to become distracted from the values and goals expressed through our mission statements is by the outside influences of the world. technology is a major culprit in this. certain influencers on social media can lead us astray to abandon our values. if we rely on technology for constant entertainment and joy, it can diminish our personal development and serve as a roadblock to achieving what we set out to do in a mission statement. i want my work, activities, and accomplishments to have meaning. in a podcast, eitan hersh talks about how following politics and news is becoming a hobby that is not fruitful. he says, “they're there to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. they're not trying to move anyone. they're not trying to empower anything. they're really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way,” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hershmoreau fye week 11). how we spend our time defines us, and i want to always remember that time is a gift and that, through the activities i take part in, i should be accomplishing something. moreover, i want my accomplishments to have a positive impact on the world. to start, i need to carry a positive and thankful attitude. tasha eurich writes on the importance of this by saying “difficulties were still present, but awareness of my gratitude was shifting my view, letting me see that everything was not dark and cold—in fact, many sights and sounds were quite lovely.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). additionally, i must value teamwork and my interactions with others. “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7). “ted was a bridge-builder among people and god and among people,” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). this quote from fr. jenkins in the movie hesburgh demonstrates the importance of interactions and working in community to successfully achieve a goal. to truly make a difference, i must ask for the help of others and not solely go off of my own ideas. the university of notre dame emphasizes this by including on its website, “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre damemoreau fye week 10). i must change the way i think of helping others and realize that service is often a two-way street. steve reifenberg went to chile to volunteer after graduating college. when reflecting on the experience, he writes, “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more,” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9). at the university of notre dame, i believe that there is a good balance between academic success and service. classes are rigorous and prepare students for successful careers, but the congregation of the holy cross emphasizes the importance of service. in their mission statement, it says, “our efforts, which are his, reach out to the afflicted and in a preferential way to the poor and the oppressed. we come not just as servants but as their neighbors, to be with them and of them.” (“constitutions of the holy cross” by the congregation of the holy crossmoreau fye week 12) as i go throughout my life, i want to keep these values in mind as it is important to not be caught up in one’s own success. an important thing to note when thinking about how to live a well-lived life is that “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills.” (navigating your career journeymoreau fye week 4) we can come to understand these things through ourselves and others. while taking a look at ourselves through our own eyes is important, it is also important to listen to what others see in you. through the activity in week five, i learned that my mom notices how focused i am when i work, which is something i did not realize (conversation activitymoreau fye week 5). this proved the importance of listening to others when trying to see your talents and how those talents can be used for good. by writing my eulogy (moreau fye week 8) i reflected on how i want to be remembered not someone who amassed great material wealth but someone who used her skills to make a difference and help those around her. that same philosophy is embedded in my mission statement (moreau fye week 13) and my reflection on how to live a well-lived life. integration 2: ryan retartha moreau fye 3 december 2021 hopeless hope being at the university of notre dame has taught me many things in the couple of months that i have been here, but perhaps one of the most important things i have learned here is to simply be alone. i have always been the person unable to go anywhere or do anything without having someone accompany me. i simply hated going anywhere alone or doing anything alone because i thought it was awkward and i didn’t want to be seen as a loner. at notre dame, i have had to ask myself why i am afraid to be alone and why i appear to care so much about what other people think of me when i previously didn’t struggle with it. my reluctance to be alone anywhere definitely stems from a place of insecurity. when i got to college, my personal growth and self-esteem deteriorated as i struggled with friends, the gateway program, and navigating feelings of insufficiency and worthlessness. it got to a point where i wanted to give up, disappear, and never step foot on campus again; i hated it all. i had heard so many great things about college and found myself in a deep hole of despair, awaiting the next break or time i could go home. i felt broken and lost in the huge concept of college, which is why i knew i needed to seek ways to establish community and where i felt most at home. the women using the kintsugi art as an outlet was a great reminder of the need for outlets and the beauty in learning and growing from brokenness (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). the point i was at was definitely one of my lowest while at college, but https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ i would consider myself still in healing, as i become okay with being alone and valuing the quality of my friendships over the quantity. while in the midst of this, i did my moreau assignment and was shocked to see the theme dedicated entirely to what i was going through and i extremely resonated with the advice to lonely college students (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). it reminded me that as cliche as it sounds, i truly wasn’t alone in my feelings of insufficiency and loneliness. i knew i wasn’t alone, especially in regards to my faith in god, which led me to realize how high i had set expectations for my freshman year. i found myself questioning why i was constantly let down in various facets, why wasn’t that enough for me or why did i expect that to be perfect? it became very clear to me that i was expecting more than i should’ve from my first semester. i don’t regret the high expectations i placed because they ultimately helped me transition to college easier as they served like a security blanket during the transition season. i was initially uncertain about the way i would acclimate to college, especially because i'm not the type of person who enjoys the typical party scene at college. i still went to a few because i wanted to step out of my comfort zone, but i learned to appreciate my values and faith system for what they are because they stand more firm than an inconsistent party scene. as i continue to venture through notre dame life, i will continue to place higher significance on my own belief system and remember that regardless of how i feel, i am not alone and am right where i am meant to be. my feeling of belonging here has been challenged and what was once very clear about how i would feel at notre dame became blurred quickly. i knew that being in the gateway program would allow for a different notre dame experience, but i was told that us gateways would be very close and that there would be a great sense of community between all of us. i went https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html in expecting something different than what i faced, which now makes me question what my own definition of community was. i had extremely high expectations for it and was hoping everyone would be best friends and very tight-knit. while this is mostly the case, it is the case for certain people within the cohort and not for everyone. because i expected a significant amount from a small group of complete strangers, i had to realize that community is not dependent on how close people are with each other. especially in the moreau material, i began to appreciate the way that it described a community, helping me understand that a true community embraces its differences and does not need extensive intimacy to succeed in its purpose of bringing together (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). although the gateway community was not exactly what i expected, there is clarity in the realization that although we aren't all alike or the closest of friends, we are all facing the difficult challenges of our year together and will always be bonded by our unique notre dame experience. through the myriad of unorganized events within my first three months at college, i have clung to my faith as my sense of hope. there were many moments where all i could do was have hope and trust that god had me right where he wanted me, which was the only sense of comfort i have during moments of insufficiency or loneliness. it may be hard for some to understand the hope that is exhibited while being a person of faith, but i know that my sense of hope comes from faith and ultimately keeps me sane. i feel that as humans, having hope is a coping mechanism in a way. in moments of despair and trouble, we resort to hoping for a better tomorrow and for situations to improve. i found that the screwtape letters was interesting because of the unique perspective from a demon that knows the patterns of humans, which includes the inherent sense of hope (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). having hope has helped me deal with loneliness as i knew things would get better. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106352 having hope has helped me look beyond present moments into the beauty within the future. you can never go wrong with hope and i continue to hope for many things to come throughout my college experience. although it has been a difficult journey to this point, i am thankful for every hill and valley along the way because they have led me to where i am today and i love where i am. thomas assaf october 15, 2021 moreau retartha what do i believe? i believe that i am searching for the value in life. when you think of value the first thing you think of is money and assets, but i am thinking of value as in when you are finished with your life you truly believe that you made a positive impact on the world, and you have a family and or people around you that you are proud of. to do this you must be driven by the right reasons, this makes me think of my parents. my father who is a lifelong educator who went to went to college on scholarship because it was the only way for him to get a college education, and with his skillset that his was so gifted at which was leadership and being able to get stuff done he could have become a ceo or leader of a company, but instead he wanted to teach and lead the new generation and change lives. he saw the true value even if it was just changing one kid's life through education. my mother who is also a lifelong educator, who earned her ph.d. in leadership and policy development, worked in schools then took a break to spend time my brothers and i, but when she took this break, she started keeping pace, a summer program for underprivileged youth from the inner city of atlanta, sacrificing time from her family to better these kids’ lives. this program which i have worked with extensively started with just 10 kids and now hosts around 70 each summer. this story also brings in the question of i believe that my purpose in this life is? this program has shown me early in my life what value i have found, but to see the value in what i did working at keeping pace it took me working at a ymca overnight camp in the summer where the cost per camper per week is around $1,300. i loved working at this camp and teaching these kids about god and helping them grow, but i did not feel as if i was doing something that was my purpose, like someone else could have done what i was doing at this ymca camp. i saw my true purpose at keeping pace where i could support these kids and help more kids be included in the program, because the more veteran counselors we had the more kids we could accept into the program. i believe that my community must be strong to make sure we get through the hardest times. this brings me back to my senior year of high school; it was the homecoming game against our biggest rival. in the second half one of our star plays was hit cleanly in the chest and in a fluke of an accident he got very injured, he walked off the field which is insane considering not even 30 mins later he was in an ambulance on the way to the hospital while he was crashing and his brain was bleeding. he was the first of this injury to ever happen and was in a medically induced coma. as my dad’s position at my school was headmaster and me being a senior on the football team and being seen as the main student communicator from administration to students. i saw people from all over our community reaching out not just our school community but the atlanta community. i was constantly spreading updates on the player’s condition and organizing prayers and card signing for the player and his family. this showed me that my community is not just my school or who i hang out with, rivals or not everyone reached out and did their part. i believe i am responsible for being my best self and helping the people around me become my best self. i see this in my 4 older brothers, they are all amazing examples for what i should strive to be like and what people i should surround myself with. i think i have had a great advantage when i was growing up because i always had someone to ask, from my parents to brothers, but specifically my brothers’ friends. from talking to one of my brothers’ friends who was a former gateway that made sure i choose gateway which was the best choice i could have made to my brother’s friends helping me learn python at 3 in the morning before my midterm. i believe that the best way to grow is to teach and mentor others. i expired and saw this the most during my senior year of lacrosse when i became friends with the freshmen and sophomores on the team, while i was 2-4 years older than all these kids. i learned much about myself on what habits i had when i was their age and what habits i should help them learn not only in life, but in lacrosse when teaching them to play the game. i am still in contact with these younger kids and having a couple of them visit me this year so i can try to convince them to come to notre dame. these kids also gave me the chance to be an older brother to someone as a youngest child i never got the chance to. i believe i am made to help others. while i hope to enter the business world, i want to use what i make financially and what knowledge i consume to help others no matter who they are. this makes me think of something father bill of pangborn said at mass this past week, quoting another priest he knew “if you ignore the poor you go to hell.” that was what this priest would say for his homily when the readings were what they were. money cannot make someone go to heaven or make someone a good person, but a good person with money can help create opportunists for others that they would never have in the first place. which is why i want to endow a scholarship for first generation college students one day. professor kelly moreau first year experience 24 november 2021 a love of learning as i entered college, i knew it would be rigorous, and i expected to learn much. i definitely was not wrong to make this presumption. my teachers are magnificent, and they transfer bouts of math, science, philosophy, theology, music, and english to my mind with ease. however, i learn just as much in class as i do outside of it. and no, i am not referring to the mounds of homework and reading i must do outside of class time; rather, i am acknowledging how much i learn from my peers. it is not their job to teach, and they do not try to teach; it just occurs naturally. in my time at notre dame, i have gained knowledge through encountering the different views and life-experiences of my peers. this new knowledge expands my world-view, strengthens my faith, and prompts me to teach others through the sharing of my experiences and views. i have always considered myself to have a strong faith, but the more i learn about my faith, the more i realize how little i truly know. a wise teacher once told my class that we become a composite of the five people we spend the most time around. in light of this, at notre dame, i strove to surround myself with intelligent, kind, strong catholic men and women. though, i was afraid to do this. i anticipated a need to hide my true self around these people. i felt as if i would need to present a façade. surely, i can’t let them know that i am an insecure sinner. boy, was i wrong. i was surprised to encounter brokenness within these individuals. they have all encountered struggles of their own, but there is something unique about the way they overcome these challenges. they allow themselves to be vulnerable and fall upon others in their moments of weakness. as parker j. palmer said in “thirteen ways of looking at community”, “suffering lets our “hearts break open” enough to hold both a vision of hope and the reality of resistance without tightening like a fist” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer-moreau fye week eleven). these individuals whom i look up to so much understand this claim; they do not close themselves off when they are suffering, rather, they are vulnerable. i am trying to be more like this. realizing that i do not have to bear my crosses alone nor be ashamed of them has helped me thrive this semester. i am more open with my friends, and, in turn, my relationships are closer and stronger, and i am more at peace. since i have allowed myself to share my fears, dreams, and struggles with my friends, many saturday nights have ended with deep chats in the holy cross parking lot. my closest friends have similar struggles to me. we share in classic perfectionism, and we all hate to disappoint people. in “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, julia hogan claims, “… when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week nine). these words undoubtably apply to all of us, and it has prompted much reflection within myself. do i let my self-worth depend on the approval of others? if i am honest with myself, i do. people always say that admitting a fault is the first step to eradicating it. admitting this deficiency is the first step to overcoming it. to further defeat this disordered thinking, i will remind myself that i will never be able to control what others think of me, and i am the only person who has to live with me forever. however, my mission to stop striving for others’ approval will not diminish my desire to keep the peace. as the eldest of 12 children, i am often the peacemaker, and i find myself being https://docs.google.com/document/d/1rx8rxawrxb9cotnhtzfsvfypboynpocoe0xzbnjr0j4/edit https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau a peacemaker in college too. at notre dame, i have encountered some very harsh opinions. there are certain topics that divide people like none other, and i have heard students claim that they won’t be friends with a person of a different political party, abortion stance, or vaccination status. in father john jenkins speech to the 2012 graduating class of wesley theological seminary, he claims, “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by father john jenkinsmoreau fye week ten). father jenkins was spot-on with this assessment. too often people judge and dismiss each other because of opinions they hold. they fail to realize the reason each person holds these beliefs is the same; almost everyone in america just wants what is best for the most number of people— we just all have different ways of accomplishing this common goal. i try my best to remind others of this when they are disagreeing. as chris abayasinghe said in “with voices true snapshot, “i use every moment that i can with the kids as a teaching opportunity” (“with voices true snapshot” chris abayasinghe moreau fye week eleven). when i am with individuals who are unforgiving or struggling to see other perspectives, i attempt to teach them without being condescending—which is difficult! however, i know it is necessary. today’s political environment is too harsh, and teaching is necessary. speaking of teaching, this semester has revealed my innate desire to be an educator— specifically a catholic educator. being at notre dame has made me extremely appreciative of the catholic formation that i was so blessed to receive as well as the wonderful education i am receiving here. i wish that everyone had the same privileges that i have since i have encountered many people who do not. though, i know i can help more people be formed and educated by becoming an educator myself. according to “holy cross and christian education”, “the work https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ of education is essential to the life of the church and its apostolic mission of going out to all the nations proclaiming the gospel as jesus instructed his disciples to do in his final commission” (“holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week twelve). this quotation reminds me of why education is essential, and it motivates me to be the best educator that i can be. if i could sum-up my notre dame experience in three words, they would be “learning from everyone”. through my encounters with my peers, i gain perspective in ways that the classroom does not provide. a line in holy cross’ constitutions reads, “and, as in every work of our mission, we find that we ourselves stand to learn much from those whom we are called to teach.” (2.16) (“holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week twelve) in observing how much i can learn from my peers, i realize how accurate this statement is, and i hope to let it ring true through the rest of my life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192714?module_item_id=109541 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192714?module_item_id=109541 moreau integration #2 moreau 31 11/30/21 integration #2 one of the most important thing i’ve learned these past few months at notre dame is how important it is to take care of yourself. not only physically, but also taking time out of other maybe more fun activities to do what i need. it’s really hard to set limits for yourself before you feel like you’re slipping away from being yourself. it is really easy to keep moving and going, and then eventually you will find yourself exhausted and worn out, so much so that you can’t even take care of yourself. i have learned this the hard way, but also been super intentional about how i give my time out and to whom. it’s really hard to not spend all of my time with the people i’ve become close with, but i have gotten better at prioritizing myself. seeing how people react to my boundaries has also helped me gauge the people i want in my life. for example, someone who is hesitant or off-put by me setting a boundary for myself (like a bed-time), shows me how they care about me. it is proof that someone cares about my wellbeing or does not, and this has helped my friendships. i felt that julia hogan’s piece, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” helped me understand how to set these boundaries for myself. in the article, she says “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life. additionally, when you let your selfworth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world.” i have been very 1 intentional about doing things i find rewarding and that help me grow, rather than what i think other people do for those outcomes or what i think other’s expect me to do. i have struggled a lot with the idea of needing to be accepted by others, and i’ve realized that often those expectations they have are not what i want for myself. i was confused at the beginning of the year how everyone managed to do everything at once, and with people, until i realized that a lot of the time is spent alone, especially during the day. it is easy to become wrapped up in this idea that you need to be spending 24/7 with people, but time alone has actually been the most impactful to me. really having to be by myself, and feel that sense of alone instead of loneliness. i am so grateful that even when i am alone i do not feel lonely, or when i’m with others i feel supported, because that is something i’ve worked a lot on here. i think that has come from me being really vulnerable and open with my close friends here, and i already feel as if they know me as well as a lot of people from home. i felt like the idea of newness or general anxiety has decreased since i’ve been here. when i first came, every class and coffee date was anxiety provoking. while things become more natural to me, like my roommate and schedule for each repeating (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) 1 week, some things still remain uncomfortable. personal hesitation around being alone and fomo prevents me from going to eat alone and therefore planning my time around other people. i have learned a lot about the benefits of being alone and the power of doing things by yourself. while being alone felt new for a bit, i now am much more comfortable with confronting it. i learn and work well with myself, and i find now i need it to function and be kind to others. i used to find myself the most extroverted person who loved being surrounded by others. i have learned that i actually am maybe more introverted, for i crave time to myself. i appreciate having my friends and such around, but i also feel as if sometimes alone time is the most supportive to my own mental health. learning how to balance the two has been difficult, but it has helped me learn a lot more about myself. while i find notre dame to be a bit less diverse than the usual population i grew up with, i have found a lot of diverse opinions and ideas compared to back home. i feel like being surrounded by novel ideas has helped me define my own beliefs, and determine that i can have differing opinions. i know i tend to gravitate towards people who are similar to me, so i have been very intentional about talking to people i wouldn’t usually; this has given me so much insight into how deep this community really is, despite the homogenous appearance of notre dame. in week 11, we looked at encountering community, and the drawbacks of having a single locus of understanding the world in a bubble. in professor agustin fuentes’s ted talk he says “if race as we use the term if not a reflection of biological groups, then the real differences we see between races are based on not biological characteristics, but social, historical, socio-economic ones.” while i have not had a lot of experiences with people physically 2 very diverse from myself, as compared to high-school, i think this idea can be applied to any general difference in identity. for example, being non-catholic has shaped my interactions with those in my dorm in a different way than my catholic roommate. while at first i felt isolated and alone in this, i have found that those with strong religious beliefs (in catholicism specifically) have changed my perception on how different religions impact ones choices. just because someone has a different aspect of their identity to myself, labeling it as “other” is what pushes me away from starting a deep conversation with them. once i realized that these things that separate my from others are not really biological or fundamentally isolating, i have been able to see them as similar to myself and found a lot in common about how i see the world. i also have learned that i am not as anti-catholic as i felt in high-school, and i have grown closer to exploring my own faith, whether that is through other’s experiences with religion or it’s influence on more secular activities. (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11)2 integration 1 word count: 1743 my foundational unchangeable infallible beliefs i believe that i am a sinner and nowhere near perfect (moreau #1) this belief is a direct reflection of my catholic faith. i have been raised from a devout catholic family, and although my faith had not always been so strong, a catholic high school education exponentially grew my catholic faith. as a result, i have more immersed myself in this religion and strongly believe all its teachings. unfortunately, because i am aware that i am a sinner, i sometimes stress myself out over a sin and believe that i am not worthy of god’s abundant mercy. however, as god’s love and mercy are unconditional, i could never do anything to lose his love, and believing that i am enough can help me to remember that i am always worthy of love and forgiveness. knowing of god’s abundant mercy and grace heavily impacts my mental attitude and gives me a sense of purpose and belonging in my life that will be vital for my future growth. i believe that i am enough (moreau #1) this statement originates from my long-term goal and desire to build self-confidence. i have always sought to develop more self-confidence and have more conviction in my own character, beliefs, and values. like my previous statements, sometimes a terrible mistake challenges this belief and makes me question my own values. however, i have succeeded in remaining strong and resisting baseless calls to change my principles. i have learned to “believe that [i] are enough, [and i can now] stop screaming and start listening” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). believing i am enough means i believe, and will continue to believe in the future, that i will always be worthy of god’s grace, worthy of my family’s love, and worthy of all good things given to me. i believe that god’s love and mercy is unconditional (moreau #1) building off the previous statement, this belief also comes from my background in a devout catholic family. learning from my theology classes and catholic role models in the academic realm, i have come to the undeniable conclusion that god’s love and mercy have no limits and cannot be lost. however, a challenge is to sometimes believe you have screwed up so badly that not even god can love you anymore, however, this idea could never possibly come true. no matter what you do, god will always welcome you back with open arms and limitless mercy—which includes mistakes i have made and will ever make. i believe that i am protected on an ultralight beam (moreau #3) unironically originating from my favorite artist, kanye west talks about his faith being an ultralight beam in that “whenever he’s down or feels he can’t fight anymore, he searches for the light and knows, in god’s hands, everything will be alright” , which similarly echoes the sentiment in father pete mccormick’s speech (“what does ‘ultralight beam’ really mean” by jacob osborn https://manofmany.com/ entertainment/ultralight-beam-meaning). this concept has developed my life and mindset because i have felt an incredible sense of warmth and togetherness https://manofmany.com/%20entertainment/ultralight-beam-meaning https://manofmany.com/%20entertainment/ultralight-beam-meaning because of my faith. i feel i am never alone in any battle and that even when i lack control of some areas of my life, everything is always in god’s hands and his plan is much greater than mine. although my faith is challenged because society preaches the exact opposite of my faith, i know and find comfort in the truths of my faith, and i know that there is a loving god who will never abandon me. having this comfort and security will help me to carry my confidence in all my future endeavors. i believe that at my core the very presence of god, and i live to love and serve him (moreau #2) “in life i have clear goals and aims so i have discovered a satisfying life purpose”, and this meaning and purpose comes from god (“via character strengths survey” – moreau fye week 2). a recurring theme in both my life and this assignment, god giving me light and direction has always remained a core value in my life. at my all-boys catholic high school, one of our “formation themes” was centrality of christ, and it stressed the importance of keeping god at the center of your life, and all things you do are based on your faith. although it can be challenging to resist temptation and avoid sins, constantly keeping god at my core has enabled me to strive for greatness and model my life off my faith. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by maintaining a healthy, strongly founded relationship (moreau #4) this belief comes directly from my strong and committed but long-distance relationship. with the heavy and everchanging adjustments we have had to make in the past 50ish days, a fair number of challenges have come up between us. however, we have always come out from these issues stronger than when we first encountered them, and we have held true to my fourth qqc quote: “people in healthy relationships respect each other. they can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. they trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” (the red flag campaign) – moreau fye week 4). despite the challenges and rainy days, we have only grown in our healthiness, strength, love, and trust, and we will continue to grow stronger parallel to this quote which is why this belief has tremendous meaning to me. i believe that every setback and disappointment is a lesson (moreau #5) my biggest confrontation with this belief occurred with the covid-19 pandemic. originally, the pandemic appeared to be a major setback that drew a stake into all my plans and happiness. however, after a period of self-reflection and looking into all aspects of my life, i decided to use it as a period of growth; i disconnected from fake and destructive friends and grew closer to real ones, i finally decided to take my physical and mental health more seriously, and i adapted to the changes in college applications and academic advancement. overall, i took this “setback and disappointment as a lesson” to improve my life in every way imaginable, and as a result, i came out of quarantine in the best version of myself imaginable and ready to get started on the next chapter of my life at notre dame (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). i believe that my communities has and should shape the person i am today (moreau #5 and moreau #6) although i tried to find ways to condense this response, the best way to explain this belief is to share once more my “where i’m from” poem in its entirety. this poem perfectly sums up my origins and how i have developed as a person and who has influenced this development. this community that i have developed from has been right by my side through every challenge that surfaces and has crafted the man i strove to be and have now become. this poem certainly proves why this belief has significant meaning to how i live my life: i come from an unselfish and loving family whose sacrifices have enabled me to pursue the best version of myself and become who i strive to be i come from a faithful and wonderful mother the most special woman in the world is she whose unconditional love and sacrifice enables me to become who i strive to be i come from a loyal and masculine father strength, courage, and faith models he whose strong male influence inspires who i strive to be i come from close and unbreakable bond with my brother inseparable, like a dog and a flee my lifelong role model, my greatest companion who models who i strive to be i come from a strong and faithful relationship long-distance, but close in heart to the highest degree gives me confidence, gives me motivation to become who i strive to be i come from a tight-knit and devoted high school with an unparalleled brotherhood, known as servants of mary the faith formation and brotherly community shaped the man i strive to be all of these strong lifelong influences answer the question of where i am from i can now say, with full confidence the man i strive to be now is the man i have become. i believe that i am made to is to cultivate my virtues (moreau #6) like i said before, i was doing a poor job cultivating my virtues pre-pandemic. however, after an extended period of self-reflection and acknowledgment, i decided to fix this underlying issue. this mindset led me to surround myself with people who would inspire me to pursue the best version of myself; this change made me deeper and prouder of my faith and my virtues. however, despite this growth, challenges arise from the fact that society tries to impress vices and contrasting values on you that lead you into temptation. however, the implications of this cultivation of virtues by surrounding myself with constructive people keep me out of trouble, and i find warmth and success in cultivating my virtues in this way. i believe that i grow my keeping an open mind (moreau #7) especially growing up in an era of stark political divide, i have realized that the largest hinder and prevention of growth is to enter an argument or discussion with a closed mind. as a result, i have worked to develop an always-open mind to first plant myself in the other person’s shoes before making any bold statements or giving harsh judgment of their character. my quote from my qqc summarizes this sentiment best: “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american). pride and ego sometimes hinder this mindset, as in some arguments—although sometimes true and justified—i believe so strongly that i am right that i refuse to even consider the other side. however, when i maintain an open mind, i can hear a broader spectrum of beliefs and backgrounds that continually evolve my character and awareness. panethiere moreau integration 1 moreau fye theo helm integration 1 15 october 2021 authentically myself: finding identity in a foreign environment root belief 1: i believe everyone can learn something new about themselves by listening to the stories of others, being open to their voices and vulnerable with your own story. throughout the first half of the semester, i have been exposed to many different people, with many different life stories and backgrounds. while i have found people with similar upbringings to me, i’ve also met many individuals who could not differ more in their upbringing when compared to mine—in experience with school, with family, and with faith. while these moments where you don’t appear to have much in common with someone else can sometimes feel awkward or disjointed, the sharing of these pieces of ourselves can help us better understand our own values, personal identity, and beliefs. being able to acknowledge differences yet still be able to connect and care for others is very important to me and the way i treat my peers. within these moments, it’s important to acknowledge my upbringing and its shortcomings in understanding others, and i should lean on my compassion to better learn about myself through these unfamiliar interactions. tapping into compassion “help[s] people learn to feel the proper kind of outrage at injustice, the proper form of reverence before sacrifice, the proper swelling of civic pride, the proper affection for [their] fellows” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week seven). when we open our hearts, we can open our minds to learning about them and how we are actually more similar than we previously thought. to me, caring for others is integral to how i can mold and shape myself and grow my personal understanding of those https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare who share the world with me, whether on notre dame’s campus or internationally. encouraging others to share these experiences, too, can help us to want to share our life stories with so-called strangers: if we can understand that “what made [us] vulnerable made [us] beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), we would be much better off understanding one another. our flaws and our fears shouldn’t be a source for judgement from others, but rather a jumping point for understanding. a special moment during moreau so far was our sharing of the “where i’m from” poems in the style of george ella lyon (moreau fye week six). seeing the pieces of their upbringing that my moreau classmates found to be essential to their identity was really eye-opening. from small family traditions to life-changing experiences, every single one of us created a different story of ourselves with our experiences, and i think it brought us closer to understanding each other. root belief 2: i believe that my connection to faith has a large impact on the way i treat others. before coming to notre dame, i wasn’t really around faith-based learning in high school, so i didn’t really see how impactful my faith was in my decisions on a day-to-day basis until recently. faith sometimes has been put on my life’s backburner for other things, like school, sports, or even social activities, and i have recently realized that my worst moments, or perhaps the moments where i’m most unlike myself, have been present in times where i’ve felt the most far from my faith. being at notre dame has helped to shape my mentality of faith being something that improves what is already there, especially in my relationships with others. having some sort of faith tradition and expectation of how to treat others has helped me in overall treating my peers with the same value of compassion as i wish to receive. incorporating https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 faith more heavily in how i interact with others on a daily basis, whether it’s my closest friends or complete strangers, being skilled with more hope in my day-to-day routine has filled me with a new found confidence in making and sustaining relationships, for “hope is the confidence that we are moving toward light, not darkness; joy, not sorrow; life, not death” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). root belief 3: i believe it is more important to be a good person than an accomplished/successful person. simply put, “our lives are not our resumes” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c moreau fye week five); everything that we do does not have to be in the hopes of recognition. the good that we do should be for the sake of doing good, not appearing good. it can be really easy to fall into the mentality of reducing yourself to just your accomplishments—after the stress of college applications and marketing yourself to top universities, being concerned with accomplishment is somewhat-ingrained in the high-achieving high-school brain. getting caught up in the respectability of superficial accomplishments can be overwhelming in the grand scheme of things. constantly trying to be “better” than other people instead of trying to better other people and yourself causes more harm than good in the long run. the capability for compassion you may have is instead replaced with competitiveness in an unhealthy way, and things that are good at heart cannot be done without the help of others: “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone. therefore we must be saved by love” (quote from reinhold neibuhr in “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). doing things that are kind in spirit and for the sake of other people, helping them out, and supporting their own personal growth is one of the best ways https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim to create life-long relationships with those around you. at notre dame, being surrounded by so many people who care so much about others and how to treat your fellow students, faculty, and staff here and in the real world is such an important skill; the first few weeks of college have shown me how important these relationship-enhancing behaviors are in building my own community within notre dame. throughout the first month of school, and likely throughout all four years i will be here, identifying the types of people i want to be around has become something i’ve found needs to be a priority. surrounding myself with good people who care for others not for the sake of just making themselves appear better, but also to help others is something i actively seek out in my relationships. in week four of moreau, learning about the different signs of positive and negative friendships has been really helpful for me when navigating my blossoming friendships here at notre dame throughout the first semester and beyond—having friendships which “are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” have made my transition into college so much easier (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). these people, who help me bring joy to my life by not only helping me, but also helping others, help me define the good i want to emulate, and to me have the most respectable characters on campus. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ integration 2 selm 1 josephine selm alison thigpen fys 10101 3 december 2021 facing difficulties and looking to the future in the weeks following fall break, this class has discussed topics in relation to experiencing both highs and lows of livelihood. the juxtaposition of the topics of encountering dissonance and brokenness in comparison to those of encountering community and hope highlight the notion that we are all going to face hardships in life, but we will also experience moments of joy and connection. learning not only to balance these experiences but also the emotions that accompany them is an integral part of life, hence the importance of their discussion in this course. week thirteen itself is entitled encountering horizons, and it is extremely fitting in regards to this course, as we approach the close of the semester and the beginning of a new one. the last few months have been filled with opportunities for growth and insight into my own goals and aspirations, and learning to encounter both the difficulties and successes of life in regards to not only my career but also to my future at notre dame will greatly enable me to live a fuller, more meaningful life. dissonance was discussed in relation to one's relationships and self-worth. emery bergmann, in her video titled “advice from a formerly lonely college student,” discussed this dissonance that she experienced in relation to the beginning of her college career, in which the version of college that she had envisioned, full of new friends and experiences, actually ended up being entirely different. bergmann discussed the emotions that she felt throughout this process, stating that “[l]oneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self criticism: ‘i can’t find my selm 2 place among these people, so it must be my fault.’ … but by putting myself out there, i found so many communities on campus to invest myself in, and where i knew i would be happily received” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). by discussing the loneliness that she felt, bergmann highlighted a key facade of college life that many people experience -that of extreme community and friendship. i myself fully related to bergmann’s statements, as i also expected to go into college and immediately make friends. in reality, i was very lonely, and aside from a few acquaintances, i didn’t feel as if i had truly made any friends. even through classes and participating in clubs, i failed to cultivate any meaningful relationships, and it wasn’t for a couple months before i truly formed solid friendships. this lesson is something that i want to pass onto others, so that they understand these feelings and know that it is normal for this to occur, because i believe that if i had known this, i might’ve approached the situation differently. the combination of my own and of bergmann’s experiences highlights the importance of the discussion of this loneliness that so often accompanies the beginning of college. by not discussing this topic or making them known to a wider audience of incoming students, this false image was painted of community. addressing this notion would help to lessen the dissonance that results from this interaction, and people will be better able to understand that the feelings they experience are justified and normal. week ten of this course divulged into encountering brokenness, and looking at ways of not only addressing these emotions, but also to pursue healing. from religion to racism, brokenness is encountered across many areas, and the healing of this brokenness is a main area of evaluation, especially in regards to living healthy lifestyles and moving on from the events that caused this suffering. an articles on a kintsugi workshop by grotto network displays one way in which women find healing, with the video stating “...they learn that the things that selm 3 they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop.” by grotto network moreau fye week ten). i found myself approaching my college career while i was still suffering from past issues, and it wasn’t until i addressed these issues before i could truly move-on and approach college from a different perspective. feelings of inadequacy and imposter syndrome felt constricting on my goals and ambitions, and i was struggling to get past this and to truly put my best effort forward. this video ultimately helped me to realize the importance of healing from brokenness and embracing life following these instances. the only way to live a full life is if you are not being held back by your past, so learning to address these instances and to move forward is a vital part of growing up and moving forward, and it truly helped me throughout this semester in adjusting to college life and moving past my inhibitions to be more confident in my actions and the results of them. community was also discussed at length, in relation to both characteristics of community and to building and embracing community. throughout this process, the importance of this sense within aspects of life was highlighted. not only does community foster a support network, but it is also received, not manufactured. this presents the notion that community is present in every situation, and therefore will vary based on location and demographics of the area. this, therefore, demonstrates the variety present within communities, and the importance of said variety. by increasing diversity, the community can be strengthened, increasing the benefits available to those within the community. agustin fuentes, in his lecture titled “diversity matters,” states that “exposure and access to different viewpoints and life experiences offers insights and changes biases” (“diversity matters.” by agustin fuentesmoreau fye week eleven). biases harm selm 4 community, as they limit the scope that community can play by decreasing the level of diversity present. coming from a small rural highschool, there wasn’t a lot of diversity within the school and the community itself. everyone tended to display similar backstories, with the only differences really being drawn upon monetary and familial differences. since beginning school here, however, i have been able to meet and interact with a multitude of different people, all of increasingly different backgrounds, upbringings, and values. this exposure has helped me to become more insightful of lifestyles different from my own, and i hope that it also has worked to change some of the biases that i might have held when i first started school. these experiences will only increase in the future, and i hope to continue to change and evolve as a result of them into a better version of myself. hope was the final topic of discussion in this course, especially concerning hope for the future in a number of different areas. in relation to facing adversity, hope is especially beneficial to overcoming hardships. adversity serves to strengthen one for the future, instilling a message of hope that the hard times will pass and you will be better because of the difficulty of the challenges faced. this message is applicable across a wide range of areas, including in relation to religion. the congregation of holy cross discusses this as well, stating that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future, but no education in the faith is complete without an understanding of how the cross is much more than a burden once carried by jesus.” (“holy cross and christian education.” by congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve). this image of jesus carrying the cross is indicative of our own lives, as we also have to carry our own burdens. there is hope in it as well, because jesus’ actions were done so to allow humanity to enter heaven. ultimately, nothing in our lives is permanent or set in stone -everything has the selm 5 potential to change. therefore, these hardships that are faced, which often seem never-ending, will too eventually come to pass. this very concept instills a sense of hope for change, especially among the ideal that change is coming and that hardships will come to pass. utilizing this sense of hope to work though the difficulties of life is therefore a key notion to learn and employ in our lives. college itself is chalked full of hardships and setbacks, and i have faced my fair share. from not doing as well as i had hoped on exams to struggling to balance school and extracurricular activities, at times things have felt impossible. over time, though, i have been able to push through the difficulties, and the adversity that i faced during this process helped to demonstrate that these difficulties will pass. even now, i am struggling to balance my schedule to study for midterms, write papers, and begin studying for finals, but i can utilize this lesson to help get through the approaching difficulties with the knowledge that this time will come to pass and that i will be better as a result of the difficulties i will face. the implementation of key discussion points in relation to building healthy lifestyles and finding healing is a key notion of this class, and it helps to teach the importance of both the highs and lows of livelihood. the topics of encountering dissonance, brokenness, community, and hope are all necessary to discuss, as we are all going to face hardships in life, but we will also experience moments of joy and connection. learning to balance these experiences and their corresponding emotions helps to build healthy relationships and lifestyles, and are therefore important to discuss and interpret in one’s own life. all of these notions tie together, looking to the future and the changes to come, rather than to dwelling on the past. the last few months have been filled with opportunities for growth and insight into my own goals and aspirations, and by learning to encounter both the difficulties and successes of life in regards to not only my career but also to my future at notre dame, i will be better able to live a fuller, more meaningful life. selm 6 works cited bergmann, emery. “advice from a formerly lonely college student.” the new york times, the new york times, 9 oct. 2018, https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college -student.html. fuentes, agustin. “diversity matters.” university of notre dame, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44 ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436. grotto. “women find healing through kintsugi workshop.” grotto network, 2 july 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/. “holy cross and christian education.” congregation of holy cross, https://www.holycrossusa.org/about-us/ministries/education/holy-cross-and-christian-edu cation/. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://www.holycrossusa.org/about-us/ministries/education/holy-cross-and-christian-education/ https://www.holycrossusa.org/about-us/ministries/education/holy-cross-and-christian-education/ what am i made for? what is the meaning of life? why am i here? what is my purpose? these philosophical questions can be interpreted by our own limitations. what can i do on this earth? how can i make it a better place? how can i best spend the time i have left? there is no answer to the question of what you’re made for, but the best way to approach it is to ask yourself not what you are made for, but what makes you special. unlike lois lowry’s the giver, we are not assigned a job or a role in this world, we can decide it ourselves. in this way, we all contribute to society and the world in our own ways, and what we are made for is answered by our strengths. the class clown, and maybe later on, a stand-up comedian, is made to entertain. the person with innate athleticism is made to perform. the person with an incredible memory is made for a scientific field. to answer the question of what i am made for can be answered through experiences and effort. the world we live in is structured in a way in which we hope to incentivize people that are the best at what they do to perform in that field. good and efficient work creates a better life for everyone. however, this can be taken to an extreme. “instead of letting your life be defined by the grades you get or the promotions you earn, what if you focused on living a balanced life full of friends, family, work, and leisure?” (week 9). it is easy to get caught up in the competitive cycle of life, where you have to outperform the person next to you to get approval from society or from whom you seek it. constant deadlines, tight schedules, high expectations, and more can make it difficult to stay balanced and happy between everything you do. factored into this idea of extreme competition is trust for others around you. from trust, it can be difficult to know the truth. sometimes, the “truth” about a decision you are making isn’t known until you have made the decision. “it isn’t nice to think that we aren’t nice”(week 7). truth is a slippery slope of psychology, philosophy, ethics. truth can be subjective, and truth can be different to other people. the way this quote applies to what truth is connected to the intention of others. down to its most basic core, we hope to gain the truth from other people with good intentions and people that are being nice. identifying the truth and bringing it to your community is another issue entirely. one thing we all have in common is the responsibility to improve our community, no matter what community means to us. the qqc from week 10 gives us a great example of solving problems within our community. “school leaders are placed squarely in the middle, trying to respond to the demands of both groups and looking for support from their boards and other stakeholders.(week 10)” for those in power, it is difficult to please everyone in the community around you, especially when an issue arises that is controversial. while the death itself of george floyd should not be controversial, the politics surrounding the trial, in addition to new measures taken by police certainly were. we are made for anything and everything on our path to happiness. what am i made of? i, and everyone existing in the world, are made of our experiences. the quality and experiences of life vary drastically around the world, and that is the beauty of life. it is important to know that everyone’s story is a unique one and one to be proud of. the experiences of what makes us who we are include every single experience we’ve had; the positive and negative ones, the ones we share, but also the ones we keep private. memories we’ve had from our childhood, and recent events. memories and experiences are even studied from a psychological perspective, where memories and experiences with a strong emotion connected to them tend to be remembered or more memorable. flashbulb memory is the phenomenon that occurs when this emotional memory is experienced. sad memories like the death of a loved one, a severe injury, and even a rejection can cause these memories just like happy memories, like a marriage proposal, graduation, or child can cause them. in my experience, the most resounding experiences that stay with us are the negative ones. these are the embarrassing moments that we learn from and grow from. sometimes, these experiences can even be voluntary, where we put ourselves in difficult situations in order to grow from them. “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives.(week 11)” taken figuratively, this quote shows that the people around us that might not like us or have motives different from us are the best to interact with. these people can sometimes bring out the worst in us; our insecurities, vulnerabilities, and weaknesses, and therefore allow us to act on and grow from them. these negative experiences can turn us into better people. the cliche of failure makes the best teacher, therefore, does have some truth to it. we are made of our experiences, but we cannot know what to expect from our experiences in the future. for this reason, we place expectations on ourselves, as well as hope, for fulfillment in the future. hope is a valuable and vital thing to have, as it is a promise to ourselves that we can and will be better people. hope drives everyone forward, no matter what kind of “hope” it is. whether it is a religious faith, a personal hope, or a familial promise, hope that good things are ahead is what drives us forward as humans. “everyone approaches their lives in a different way.(week 12)” but the hope that next week will bring better things than this one and that the next thing you try will be amazing is what makes us tick. we are made of our past, and we are made for the things we have learned in our experiences. integration #2 williams 1 moreau first year experience bryan reaume 3 december 2021 god, country, and personal growth it is amazing to see how much growth college students experience over the course of a semester. the feeling is almost palpable in the air. the young students who arrived here in august have now become adults in the span of a few months. those same individuals who came to notre dame wide-eyed and nervous have begun to find their place here. i am one of those individuals who have discovered where they belong at this university. it has taken a wide diversity of experiences, moments, and interactions to bring me to this outcome. through difficult emotions and tremendous accomplishments, i have realized who i am and where i fit into my campus relationships. i understand my value as a free-thinking person who has so much to share with his peers and so much potential that he can reach. i can genuinely say that i am excited to see where the next four years take me and how much more i will uncover about myself. god and country is not the only thing that notre dame should pride itself in, but the level of personal growth that it enables within each and every one of us. i have been presented with several extracurricular opportunities here at notre dame. in high school, i constantly pushed myself to be involved in everything that was happening around me. whether it was the national honor society or student council, i felt like i needed to have a role in every single organization and every volunteer opportunity made available to me. coming to college made me realize that i could finally take a step back and lean into the kind of organizations that truly channeled my passion. i made the decision to say no to some clubs and williams 2 opportunities, simply so i could be more present and more genuine in the kind of work that i did while at notre dame. i really appreciate what julia hogan says in her grotto article about letting go of expectations. julia tells her readers to “look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (hogan moreau fye week #9). i honestly believe this is one of the best decisions i have made while at college. by choosing just a few groups like notre dame television and the first undergraduate experience in leadership (fuel) to dedicate my time and energy, i enjoy the work more and i have seen the direct impact of that work. there is no better feeling than seeing your effort lead to a positive outcome. some of my personal growth has been a direct result of my interactions with other people on campus. notre dame has been my first real opportunity to live and work alongside such a large group of people. my experience so far has taught me the importance of having real and honest conversations with my peers. we all have struggled with the same demons and tormented thoughts that have plagued young people over the past few years. in some ways, leaning into these experiences and sharing them with my classmates have brought us closer together. i really like what parker palmer explains in his article about building community. parkers tell us that “suffering lets our hearts break open enough to hold both a vision of hope and the reality of resistance without tightening like a fist” (palmer moreau fye week #11). the more we open our hearts as people going through a crazy life of extreme happiness and extreme sadness, the more we showcase our humanity and connect to one another. the more i have shared about my brother and his tragic death, the more i have inspired other people to share their personal stories and helped them to understand the role they play in shaping that story in the future. i am excited to continue leaning into the real life experiences that we all go through. williams 3 one experience that i have opened up to my classmates about is my journey of running for national ffa office. it has been a goal of mine to be elected as a national ffa officer for several years. i was fortunate enough to be selected as indiana’s national officer candidate and received the opportunity to go through the official interview rounds. unfortunately, i was not selected for the final team. the emotions that washed over me after the decision were a roller coaster ride of disbelief, sadness, and acceptance. not many young people go through such an intense interview process, let alone face the kind of difficult outcome that i did. after spending the last few weeks to process and uncover my own feelings about the matter, i have realized that it was god’s plan to steer my life in a new direction. in many respects, national ffa office was just another way for me to continue pushing off my final goodbye to an organization that i had poured six years of my life into. i have been given a fresh start now and can carve a new identity for myself. i really like what campus ministry shared in their publication on the history of holy cross education. campus ministry tell us that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (campus ministry moreau fye week #12). going through the interviews and finally experiencing true defeat has made me into a stronger person. i have also grown my appreciation for those opportunities that i was awarded and that i will hopefully be awarded in the future. no one likes facing challenges, but i have truly witnessed personal growth by tackling these challenges in my own life. i am someone that leans heavily upon others for support and encouragement. i am a people’s person to the max and it would be very unusual to not find me around people. one area where i have seen personal growth is my expectations for other people. i once pushed myself to perfection and through high school i slowly started to expect the same from my classmates. williams 4 thankfully, college has completely rewired my mental processing behind how i interact and engage with fellow students. after coming to terms with my own imperfections and understanding the importance of imperfect, i have realized that same value in others. life is not made to be seen through a perfect lens with cookie cutter people to inhabit the world. the life we live is made exponentially more fulfilling when people encounter obstacles and find ways to constantly grow and develop. i have encountered this in conversations with people in my dorm and in my various friends groups. expecting perfection from them and from myself is unhealthy and can quickly lead to toxic relationships. one of my favorite quotes from the semester’s readings comes from kirsten helgeson in her video about the art of kintsugi. kirsten tells us that “the piece is more beautiful for having been broken” (helgeson moreau fye week #10). i have gained a greater appreciation for my friends and for myself because we are willing to own our faults rather than hide them. in my opinion, you can only truly discover yourself when you come to terms with everything about yourself. the next semester ahead will find me entering a brand new chapter in my life. as mentioned in some of my previous responses, i have been given an incredible opportunity for a new beginning. i no longer have my highschool life and experiences to define where i take myself in the future. i have incredible leadership opportunities on campus, an amazing network of friends, and some serious growth moments that have shaped me into a better person just in the space of a few months. it is mind blowing to realize that i started this whole college journey just a few months ago. i have become myself thanks to the hardships and beautiful moments that i have encountered while at notre dame. each has taught me a specific lesson on how to be more myself, on how to lean into difficult experiences, and how to find the human beauty in other people. my growth is not yet over. i truly believe that each and every one of us constantly grows williams 5 over our entire life. while i do not know what growth still lies ahead for me, i am thankful and ready to open my heart completely to the future. it has been a great first semester of god, country, and personal growth here at notre dame and i appreciate the role that our moreau class has played in that. here’s to everything that is ahead for us together. williams 6 works cited campus ministry. “holy cross and christian education” university of notre dame publications, https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/. accessed 12 november 2021. helgeson, kirsten. “women find healing through kintsugi workshop.” grotto, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art /?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. accessed 20 october 2021. hogan, julia. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” grotto, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ ?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. accessed 20 october 2021. palmer, parker. “thirteen ways of looking at community.” center for courage and renewal, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/. accessed 1 november 2021. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 10/15 integration 1 assignment a new perspective 1. i believe that i need to overcome my fear of rejection. i’ve never been good at opening up to people. this likely stems from my speech impediment when i was younger, as my unique way of speaking made me feel like an outcast and any attempt i made to reach out to people risked me being made fun of. as i grew older, i recognized that i needed to reach out to people if i wanted to make friends, however the mental walls i erected prevented me from doing so. however, this class has encouraged me to challenge this fear, and has put me in an environment where i’m able to do so. after finishing the first qqc and listening to brown’s advice that “vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, and love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), i challenged this fear by choosing to share my story after the original speaker couldn’t make it to class. i hope i can continue to push myself to overcome my fear of rejection going into the future. 2. i believe that i am obligated to be my best self. why am i here? that’s a question i’ve never been able to answer. i could never understand why out of the trillions of possible genetic possibilities contained by mixing my parents dna i was the one that came into existence. i don’t even know if there is a reason. however, the fact that i was lucky enough to be born has made me feel obligated to make the most of the opportunity. the way i feel best accomplishes this goal is to focus on developing my best self. fortunately, moreau has allowed me to learn and practice how to do that. in moreau, i’ve learned that adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses” (should you live for you resume or your eulogy by david brooks moreau fye week 2). in order to be my best self, i need to develop both aspects of my person, whether that be by developing my adam 1 in search of an internship or developing my adam 2 by trying to connect with others. i plan on continuing to pursue the best version of myself. 3. i believe that i am searching for the way i want to live my life. ever since i moved to minnesota, religion has played an increasingly smaller part in my life. without my weekly attendance to mass with my grandfather, i’ve become increasingly secular. while i wouldn’t call myself an atheist, i’ve found that my isolation from religion in addition to my busy schedule has left me without a clear idea of how i want to live my life. father mccormick highlights the reasoning for my problem, saying that “if you’re in a hurry, faith becomes so much harder to understand” (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). while i don’t know if the practices of catholicism will be my framework, i am confident that in practicing fr. mccormick’s advice, i’ll be better able to find the framework for how i want to live my life. 4. i believe that my community should stop seeking out drama. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois in high school, i had the reputation of being a drama seeker, looking for people who were having beef and trying to watch it unfold. it made me feel important when someone confided in me about their problems with someone else.and i wasn’t alone. it seemed that drama hunting was a favored pastime of those in my high school as well as nearly everywhere else throughout the country. however, after entering college, i’ve realized that that aspect of my personality was not a good one, and i didn’t want to be known as the friend who says they hate drama when they actually relish it. olivia taylor puts it succinctly when she says “beware of the friend who says they ‘hate drama’” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor moreau fye week 4). after some reflection, i recognize that instead of looking for drama i should be more empathetic to what people are going through and only involve myself in other people’s situations if they explicitly ask me to. 5. i believe that i grow by teaching others. coaching debate this year has been one of the most fulfilling challenges i have undertaken. watching my mentees succeed in their debates this season has brought me more joy than many of my personal successes. while i hope i’ve taught them a lot, i’m sure that they’ve taught me more. whether it’s about their high school’s unique way of doing things or what it’s like to be a woman in the debate space, i’ve been able to learn things i would have never known otherwise without being their coach. this sentiment was also shared by sorin when he acknowledged that “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (letter to father general moreau by edward sorin moreau fye week 5). i’ve also found that i learn academic information better this way as well. doing study groups with my peers in my dorms and helping others understand certain concepts has helped me gain a better understanding of the information i’m learning, and i’ll continue to make it a part of my studying habits. 6. i believe that my purpose is to provide for my family. coming from a family with two parents, five kids, and three dogs, my home has never been quiet. however, this also means it’s never been boring. coming from a relatively large family, i’ve developed deep connections with my relatives. consequently, i believe that it’s my job to use the opportunities i’ve been given to ensure that they all live a comfortable life. i hope to emulate my grandfather “who clawed his way out of poverty to build a better life for his family” (9/27 where i’m from poem by kian o’connor moreau fye week 6), so that no one in my family has to worry about financial instability during their lifetime. 7. i believe that i pursue truth by trying to examine every angle of an issue. in debate, i quickly introduced to the idea of looking at an issue from more than one angle, because i was required to learn how to debate either side of a given topic. while that helped open me to new perspectives, looking at an issue from two sides didn’t tell the whole story either. this is because most issues have more than two sides, so it requires more than two https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://docs.google.com/document/d/1btr9mswbngfiyhzkttwafwdd15y2q1on4ikh33st3ws/edit?usp=sharing stories to get the complete picture of the issue. this is highlighted by chimamanda ngozi adichie when she says, ““when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise” (the danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 6). moreau has given me the opportunity to listen to the stories of others, and consequently, has broadened my perspective on certain ideas. for example, i’ve only ever seen new york city as a glamorous tourist attraction, so it was interesting to hear mushfiq describe what it was like to live there as an immigrant. i hope that more people continue to share their stories so that i can continue to pursue the truth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9ihs241zeg integration 2 integration two growing through struggles my first semester at notre dame has been filled with amazing experiences and many new encounters, but i have also been faced with many hardships. i have developed into a new person throughout these last few months; my roots remain strong and intact, but i have grown tremendously in my personal beliefs and self-knowledge. the conversations we have had and the modules we have completed during moreau have caused me to reflect on my values and consider how i can become a better person through my journey at notre dame. although i have been enjoying my time at notre dame, i have had several health issues that have made my semester less than ideal. i was diagnosed with pneumonia after being at notre dame for just two weeks, which caused me to have a persistent cough for about ten weeks. along the way, i also came down with the flu and a sinus infection. battling all of these issues while being in a new environment was much harder than i could have ever imagined, but i feel that my struggles brought me closer to god. in week 12 of moreau, we discussed how “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewismoreau fye week twelve). in the past when i have been experiencing hardships, i tended to distance myself from god; however, i feel that the environment at notre dame encouraged me to grow in my faith during this period. i have started to put more of a focus on my faith life, which is an example of how my priorities have shifted in this new chapter of my life. i hope to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186053/download?download_frd=1 continue to grow in my faith during my time at notre dame, and i am confident that i am in the right place to do so. being at a new school, especially one as prestigious as notre dame, there have been times where i have felt the burden of expectation weigh down on me. in the beginning of the school year, i definitely felt the imposter syndrome that was explained in a video that we watched ("what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?" by elizabeth coxmoreau fye week nine). i found that my classes were much more difficult than they were in high school, and i struggled with balancing school and my social life. after coming back from fall break, i became very home sick, which is a feeling i did not think i would ever have. i began to realize that i was not alone in my feelings, which was a huge relief. i started getting good grades and found a great group of friends, but i know that there are many people at notre dame who have not had as good of a semester as i have. in one of the videos we watched for moreau, we learned about a woman who leads kintsugi workshops for women in her community to help them learn to heal like she did ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grottomoreau fye week ten). i was inspired by how this woman used her own experiences to reach out to those who are struggling, and it made me ask myself how i can do this too. as a member of first year class council, i represent all of the first years that live in my dorm. i originally joined this organization because i wanted to have fun and plan events, but i have realized it is much more than this: i have a responsibility to make sure that no one in our class feels alone or out of place. through conversations with many different groups of girls in my dorm, i am trying to find a way to plan things that will unite our class and that everyone will truly enjoy. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ my residential life has had a large impact on my experience at notre dame. prof. agustin fuentes explains, “so for all of us here, if our learning is to be a sign of alienation overcome, it will emerge from our witness as family. it should not surprise you that your residence halls are designed this way” ("diversity matters" by prof. agustin fuentesmoreau fye week eleven). it is clear to see that notre dame’s dorm culture is very unique. reflecting on my time so far at notre dame, i can see how all of the dorm events are built around creating a sense of community that really feels like a family. being away from my own home, this living arrangement has helped me to feel like i have another huge family on campus that is always willing to help me when i need it. before coming to college, i thought that i would absolutely hate having to live with so many other people; i love having my own bathroom and sleeping in a room by myself. i was also extremely nervous to get a random roommate; however, i have learned to really enjoy living in a communal space, and my roommate is one of my best friends. i have grown to be able to do homework with other people instead of always needing to isolate myself for hours, which has helped me to better balance my social life with school. i have also become more considerate of others since i want to be a good roommate and dorm resident. i thought i would not like having to live in the dorm for three years, but i think that this policy helps to build this unique culture. some of my favorite people that i have met are sophomores and juniors, and it has been so helpful to live with them because they are more experienced at being on their own. in the next two years, i hope that i can be as helpful and friendly as they are to all the younger girls who come into my dorm. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 in conclusion, i believe that i have experienced a lot of personal growth due to the encounters that i have had at notre dame so far. i have struggled a lot this semester being away from home and with my health, but i have loved every minute of being at notre dame. i am confident that i am in the right place, and i am beyond excited to continue my journey here. integration #2 fys 10101-59 megan leis the amber of this moment this semester has been an experience for growth, for learning and forming new connections, and for discerning what is needed of me and what i want. we’re all searching for connection and after that a legacy and meaning that transcends our lives. “as spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time” (“the screwtape letters, chapter eight” by c.s. lewis — moreau fye week twelve). we’re constantly thinking outside of our time, in more ways and perspectives than one, trying, searching for higher ground: improvements to our careers, better friendships, deeper relationships. but, “here we are, trapped in the amber of this moment,” to quote kurt vonnegut (one of my favorite authors). we’re constantly in a liminal state. in high school waiting to move on to college, in college waiting to move on to grad school, or a job, and so on it goes. but i do my best to stay present, to appreciate the moment i’m in. we only have so much time here, so i’ve been trying to make the most of it by forming meaningful relationships with those around me. which can be tough at times; there are limits to how many people i can talk to without overextending, and limits to how many people i would want to talk to in the first place. my expectations have been neatly couched into the realities of college as the semester has progressed. “now a sophomore, i see how ridiculous my expectations were for my first year. to assume i could instantly meet my new best friends while also getting used to a new place, starting a new academic career, and learning how to adjust to life away from home [...]” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann — moreau fye week nine). this university is unique in the way it has created a comforting, enveloping environment for its students, and i’ve appreciated the value of my time here. i’ve found time for myself and with others through the various communities, i’ve engaged in, becoming enmeshed in overlaying networks of people. and through my encounters with others, i’ve begun to develop a way of creating relationships with others in meaningful ways, and through that, creating community. “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives.” by 1976, i had come up with my corollary to that definition: “and when that person moves away, someone else arises immediately to take his or her place” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage & renewal — moreau fye week eleven). both in my time at home and at notre dame, i’ve learned of issues or points of conflict in my community. here, there are always improvements that can be made to school administration or classes that i don’t enjoy, and in my hometown, there’s a fair share of people i don’t agree with. but the only thing, for the most part, i can do is to control my response. in addition, though, disagreements provide opportunities to broaden our horizons, providing new perspectives and a fresh set of eyes on our issues. community requires us to actually be in community with those around us. we must be a force for good not only for those we think are deserving of it, but for everyone in our communities and beyond, good or bad. notre dame’s motto for its students, a force for good in this world, has felt relevant throughout the semester. i’ve constantly found ways to question what was previously binary, and has become more nuanced and complex. through notre dame, i’ve realized that there are multiple paths to doing good—not just the pre-med pathway, or being a doctor. while caring for an individual, or a patient, is one of the purest, most direct ways to actually help someone, there are so many more ways to have an impact on not just an individual’s but a larger group’s lives in a positive way. caring for someone’s life, though, does not just mean healing their physical self. the pathologies of the body are not the only vectors through which disease spreads in our communities—and a vaccine, or a doctor’s visit is not the only solution to our problems. i’ve found plenty of ways to pursue a career in public health here, something i was incredibly worried about when i came here. funnily enough, notre dame was one of the few schools i applied to that didn’t have a strong public health program, but as i learned, the college application process has a way of pushing people to where they're supposed to end up, or at least providing individuals with options that will truly allow them to reach their potential. and i am where i am today because of my own actions, and my decisions to, perhaps ambitiously, try to be a force for good in the world. “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guaranteed that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. — moreau fye week ten). in other words, i am only here because i’ve forced myself past the inertia of self-doubt, or the stagnation that comes with unrealized potential. and i’ve been incredibly lucky to benefit from the university’s immense resources, and i’m now making real contributions as a research assistant to two postdoctoral researchers. both do genuinely interesting research, and i’m excited to see what future opportunities this will open up for me. when facing the unknowns of college, i’ve found ways to use the resources at my disposal to take advantage of everything that’s been offered to me. here we are, trapped in the amber of this moment. but unlike a bug trapped in amber, we aren’t trapped. we have the ability to exercise our agency, to build a path to the next moment, and the next. microsoft word moreau capstone integration my mission i strive to live a life dedicated to compassion and respect for all through my words, actions, and thoughts. i want to be a person who others look up to as an example of kindness and care, and i am truly happy when i am in the presence of others and gaining wisdom through relationships. some of my greatest skills include determination, empathy, and leadership, and i would like to use these to make an impact in the lives of others. more specifically, i hope to address systemic injustices such as health disparities and inequality. i have been influenced by many in my life, including professors, peers, and family members, and i hope to use the lessons and skills i have learned from them to make a positive change in the world. i strive to use my education to also teach others and instill greater cultural relativism. although i know my ambitions and goals might not come easily, i refuse to be complacent with inequalities that need to be addressed. i know i will need to have courage and resilience in order to redefine the social normative, but i know this will be rewarding in the long-term. my mission in life has been inspired by many people who have come before me, and i aspire to live a life that has been as meaningful as some of the people i look up to. i have been greatly inspired by father hesburgh and his contributions to civil rights movements and catholic education. i admire how he has been able to take a stand on such important issues while also connecting with students and people around him on a deep level ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). despite how much he did, he was never too busy to help or give advice to someone around him. to me, this level of selflessness and balance represents the epitome of success, and i hope to live my life with the same courage and resilience as he did. i have also been inspired by father greg boyle who “bridged the gulf of mutual judgment and replaced it with kinship” through his gang intervention and rehabilitation programs ("jurisdiction" by greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i really admire his work on breaking gender and racial barriers and creating inclusive communities open towards everyone. i greatly value community and appreciate how he celebrated each person’s unique abilities and talents. i hope to follow his path and address systemic injustices and inequalities. the way i want to live my life has also been shaped by personal reflection and contemplation. over the past year, i have dedicated more time to being still and meditating. there is abundant scientific evidence demonstrating the physical and mental health benefits of taking a moment to be still and meditate, and i have found it helpful in living my life to its fullest ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). meditating has helped me come to know what i value in life and has allowed me focus more deeply on interpersonal relationships. i have also been focusing on the right way to be introspective and striking a balance between reflection on the past and living in the moment. i have been adopting the idea of asking myself “what” rather than “why” in order to have better insight and to more deeply understand my emotions ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). reflecting on my life has made me more fully realize that i value relationships with others and caring for those around me. as sister alethia mentioned, focusing on “memento mori: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” allows us to cherish each moment and live authentically ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i value this concept and utilize memento mori to focus my life on what i deem most important and what i want to be remembered for in my eulogy ("write your own eulogy" by notre dame – moreau fye week eight). one major way my life will be shaped is by my future career, and i want to make sure i do something with the rest of my life that helps others. i really appreciate all of notre dame’s resources that allow me to identify my values, interests, personality traits, and skills, and how i can combine them into a career. the interactive assessment activity affirmed my desire to interact with others and help others in my future career ("career development reflection" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i also had a conversation with my mother that played a role in my discernment. we discussed my desire for a more caring world that is respectful of people’s different cultures, beliefs, and stories. she said she hopes i can use my leaderships skills to inspire others to not be complacent with things they are not happy with in the world ("discernment conversation activity" by notre dame moreau fye week five). something that is very important to me to address in my life and future career are systemic injustices regarding race, identity, sex, and anything that hinders the inherent dignity of a person. i strongly agree with the npr podcast, “passion isn’t enough,” that we must shift our focus towards the actual needs of the people around us ("passion isn't enough" by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). although constructive discussion is valuable, it is important to focus on concrete action. here at notre dame, i utilize clubs as a means to not only learn more about different perspectives and opinions of the peers around me, but also as a way to take action and make a difference in the community. part of taking action involves courage and initiative. just as dean g. marcus cole wrote, “while education and position do not grant immunity from racial violence, they place one in a position to do something about it” and i make it my goal to utilize my notre dame education to combat inequality ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something" by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). notre dame provides a unique opportunity that not only fosters the mind but cultivates “a disciplined sensibility to the poverty, injustice, and oppression that burden the lives of many” ("university of notre dame mission statement" by notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). using my notre dame education for good could mean educating someone on implicit biases or advocating for healthcare equality in the medical field. i also enjoyed reading about notre dame’s initiatives such as the ideas of education, research and action on development to combat urban inequity and disparity, and i hope to be able to contribute to projects like this one in the future ("moment to see, courage to act symposium" by notre dame moreau fye week twelve). it is also my mission to go about making a difference in the world in an ethical and culturally competent manner. i want to adopt the idea of accompaniment and view service and caring for others as mutual relationships rather than one-sided help ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i want to focus my efforts on accompaniment rather than aid and learn and gain wisdom from the people and culture i am surrounded by. in fact, i believe this is one of the best ways to gain wisdom. too often, we are part of an echo chamber and not open to listening to the different views that surround us ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). one of the best ways to avoid an echo chamber is through inclusion and relationships. just as notre dame “consciously creates an environment of mutual respect, hospitality, and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish” i believe having inclusion is something everyone could work on ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by notre dame – moreau fye week ten). i strive to create inclusion by actively intervening when i see discrimination and by being respectful of everyone’s beliefs and identity. my goal in life is to search for truth and what better way to do that than by searching for the goodness in the people surrounding me. overall, i aspire to live a life grounded in love and respect for others; i hope to cultivate a purposeful life and leave behind a legacy of positive change. i look up to those who have come before me and lived a life-well lived, and i hope to one day inspire others. while this mission statement is just a start, i am optimistic for the future and discovering where life takes me. week 13 integration moreau 11/30/2021 integration two a unique yet difficult situation integration two, at first glance, seems much more broad in comparison to past assignments. being prompted by the open-ended question of “what have i encountered and how will i respond?” is certainly difficult to tackle, but is also enticing due to the challenges, triumphs, etc. that i have experienced through my first few months at school. i believe that it goes without saying that the program i opted to join, in that of the gateway program, is certainly isolating in essence. we are on different campuses, different dining halls, dorms, classes, and many more. obviously, this makes sense; we were given a chance to attend a prestigious university, and these were our conditions. regardless, that does not make the transition any easier, holding onto expectations and a mindset of “one and done” at holy cross. when it comes to the gateway program, it is certainly hammered into our heads that we are not real notre dame students, which i understand. however, with this mindset brings repercussions, and these repercussions can be readily related to the course material discussed and written about in moreau. so, let’s start! week nine of the moreau course required content was most likely my favorite collection of materials throughout the later part of the semester. it discussed topics that were the most relevant to our lives, as students, and the struggles of truly encountering dissonance. the first piece of content that i thought was extremely engaging was the “advice from a former lonely college student” article, written by emery bergmann. the article details the struggles of a cornell student who struggled with making friends in college, thinking she was “weird” or “an outsider” in a student body where friend groups were seemingly being formed left and right. however, she ultimately acknowledges that creating close relationships comes with time, patience, and a willingness to embrace change and rid comparison. (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). the article shed light on an almost taboo topic, which is that transition is hard. every student from the high school class of 2021, who is attending college, has most likely experienced the nuanced feelings of worriness, anxiety, fear, of not making friends. in my case, i was extremely nervous to join the cohort of gateway students and the differences we had as a group from the regular notre dame students. i knew that we were different, almost outsiders, similar to how emery bergmann felt. we were not given the same opportunities as normal students, for example, our housing situation for this year and next. and, i know these problems are trivial in comparison to other issues globally; however, the point is, it is normal to feel like an outsider at certain points in transitioning. we were uprooted in a summer, from our home, friends, family, to be thrown into a https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html 180 foot dorm knowing no one, taking rigorous academic classes, and managing a social life. these times can be difficult, but it is in our response where we find ourselves and our power to move forward. in this integration assignment, i hope to almost build a story through integrating the different week’s content. i laid out the troubles that i have encountered throughout the semester at notre dame/holy cross, and now, i want to explore how i came about finding remedy to these troubles. the article “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” was a piece of content that i found to be especially helpful in understanding how to respond to my encounters in college. the kintusgi workshops were essentially a process of putting together brokenness with gold, using a staunch juxtaposition of sadness, exhaustion, defeat, with a material so elegant in its design, with gold. the repair methods were unique, and they helped individuals combat extremely serious problems in their respective lives. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i chose this piece of content because it discusses how to deal with brokenness. in my case, i felt a feeling of brokenness at points in my journey. for example, i struggled with making genuine connections with others in the gateway program at the start of my year. i worried that if i did not have friends in the program, i would be lost, because all other students are so distant at the main campus. we would not have overlapping times, schedules, etc. in order to cope with these feelings, i began working out again. i had always loved to workout in high school, but for the first few months in college, i felt overwhelmed and put the thought in the back of my mind. however, i finally had a realization about the importance of working out, and i decided to make the change. its benefits are amazing, and it has helped me stay focused, happy, and busy at the same time. overall, the two pieces of course content in weeks nine and ten hold the common theme of struggle and response. while we may undergo loneliness, pain, loss, confusion, we must find ways to heal, which can be done through patience and mental strength, or through physical responses, such as kintsugi. i have now explained a few of my encounters and responses throughout this semester at school. although i have felt brokenness, i have also experienced growth in the community around me. in parker j. palmer’s article “thirteen ways of looking at community,” i learned concepts about community that i had not previously known. the article detailed how community is a beautiful gift, formed by a web of individuals that endure difficult times together. a key lesson that parallels between the gateway community and the lessons taught in the article is the idea that a “community that can withstand hard times and conflict can help us become not just happy but “at home” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). as a cohort, we (and past gateways) are the only individuals who understand the process of being a gateway student. the long walks to and from campus, the different course registration schedule, etc. overall, any outsider can read about the program, but not everyone can be directly a part of this community. the troubles we experience as a group turn us from just a group of students into a family. the first semester of gateway has been filled with ups and downs, as detailed before. however, one prominent idea that i have gained is the ability to have hope, both in the process https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ and in the results. in week 12 of the course content, “holy cross and christian education,” the concept of hope was touched on. a quote that i especially enjoyed, that i also discussed in my qqc, was “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it…” (“holy cross and a christian education” by campus ministry at university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). this quote was special to me because it mainly focused on breaking comfort zones through risking everything we know. at the point in my life where i had to make a decision on where i would be attending school, i decided to take a risk with coming to south bend. i had no family who went here, no friends here, and came in having never even seen the campus. however, i was willing to leave my comfort zone, take a risk, and ultimately have hope in the process and result of this risk. i felt that this piece of course content encompassed the overall idea of this integration assignment very well, while also perfectly tying together week eleven’s lessons. with the creation of community, it is crucial that across all situations, we employ hope. we must hold onto the expectation and desire to succeed in our future classes, relationships, athletics, etc. while it can be nerve wracking, we must continue to hope for a brighter and more fulfilling future. overall, our response to our encounters can be a range of actions. however, the one methodology that i keep at the back of my mind is hope; the belief that everything will work out how i desire. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192714?module_item_id=109541 the matter of me i was made out of others flaws through another’s love i briefly achieved greatness (week 2) i have since regressed to the others’ level (week 9) i am like a plane without a pilot a soldier without a command i know not what my path is from here, the only hope is that it is blessed (week 3) is redemption possible if one does not believe themselves worthy of it? i know not whether my sins are conquerable (week 9) could my judgement be clouded by childlike hubris or something more sinister? are my burdens a creation of my own design? (week 7) i cannot fathom my own innocence what am i to become? can i enjoy the splendor god has gifted me? (week 3) i wonder if my desires are my own can i defend others if i cannot protect myself? (week 5) i did not anticipate this taking the direction it did but this is what flowed from my fingertips. i think at the end of the day what moreau taught me was that i have some serious questions that i need to answer urgently, and their answers may ultimately change my path dramatically. i need to be okay with this though because it is what god intends for me. professor thigpen moreau fye integration oct 15, 2021 the foundations of belief since a young age, i have been instilled with beliefs passes down from generation to generation within my family. growing up in rural indiana, my hometown’s population is just around 900 full-time citizens. with that being said, i have been surrounded by the same people, beliefs, and values my entire life. when i began the college search, i wanted to get out of my hometown and go experience something unique, and i ended up at notre dame. notre dame had always been my dream school, but unlike many, it wasn’t my dream school because of the fighting irish football, or the beautiful gold that shines off the dome. i had a calling to notre dame because it felt like home to me. it is my safe haven that allows me to spread my wings to the world around me, to learn about the amazing opportunities in the world, and it allows me to build an even stronger foundation of beliefs. the daunting question of “what do you believe in” is very challenging to answer, but with deep thought and consideration, it can be easily established. i believe that the first formative weeks at college gave me and my peers a chance to become vulnerable to the new people and environment. during the first week of moreau, we were challenged to watch dr. brown’s ted talk, which led me to a realization. in the video, dr. brown states, “so you have to understand that i have a bachelor’s in social work, a master’s in social work and i was getting my master’s in social work. so my entire academic career has been surrounded by people who kind of believed the “life is messy, love it.” and i’m more of the “life’s messy, clean it up, organize it, and put it in a bento box” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0). the quote shows that dr. brown has been surrounded by a similar environment for many years, social work, just as myself and my peers have been surrounded by the same environment for the majority of our lives. i had always gone to school with the same kids, i have always gone out to eat at the same restaurant, and i have always driven on the same roads, but now being at notre dame that all changes. here i am able to meet unique people from all over the world, i am able to try new foods, and i am able to experience a new city, such as south bend. it is important to be vulnerable and willing to step out of your comfort zone. i believe that it is important for me to work towards resume virtues, but to also stay just as focused on eulogy virtues. in such a competitive world, it is very easy to forget morals and focus solely on building a resume; however, it is critical to also be focused on living out eulogy virtues as well. in week 2 of moreau, we examined a ted talk by david brooks where he states, “the resume virtues are the ones you put on your resume. which are the skills you bring to the marketplace. the eulogy virtues are the ones that get mentioned in the eulogy. which are deeper: who are you, in your depth, what is the nature of your relationships… most of us would say the eulogy virtues are the most important of the virtues but are they the ones we think about the most? and the answer is no” (“should you live for your resume or eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&feature=emb_logo). as i worked hard to achieve my dreams i sometimes felt myself slip away from my eulogy virtues and chase my resume virtues. i was too focused on being the most successful person and having a perfect resume. i was more concerned about how i looked on paper rather than the impact i was having on other people’s lives. i took a look in the mirror and realized that i have a moral obligation to begin living out my eulogy virtues. after deep thought and consideration, i realized that in order to be remembered as a loving, caring, and supportive person, it is important to align your eulogy virtues with your career goals. i believe that notre dame is bettering my faith, mind, and spirit. in week 3 of moreau, we watched a video from father pete where he states, “the growth that you’ve had at notre dame was not by accident, neither was it a solo event, all of us have come to this university community. a community that purposely emphasizes educating heart and mind. living lives that zealously respond to the love of god that we find in the gospel and the life of jesus christ. a community that seeks on its best days to be a family” (the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois). during my short time here at the university of notre dame, i have already begun to see a transformation in my faith, mind, and spirit. i have started to put more faith in god, i have begun to believe in myself more, and i have built amazing relationships with caring individuals from around the world. notre dame is giving me an amazing opportunity to become a better version of myself each and every day. i believe that it is very hard to deal with a toxic relationship, but if i act with respect, communicate, and see their point of view, i am able to maintain healthy relationships. in week 4 of moreau, there was a strong reading about toxic relationships that states, “often, those who excessively focus on drama are the ones who also talk about people behind their backs — causing you to wonder if they’re talking about you behind your back. rest assured, you will eventually be dragged into a dramatic situation with this friend and they will definitely talk about you behind your back” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/). i have lost many friends due to them being disrespectful behind closed doors. since i have experienced those actions first hand, i started to pride myself on always protecting others’ names and being a trustworthy person. i have not only seen my happiness improve, but i have also seen my relationships improve. i believe that through hard work and dedication, anything is possible. in week 5 of moreau, we discussed father sorin’s tortuous journey from southern indiana to notre dame. in the reading of father sorin’s letter, it states, “a few hours afterward we came to notre dame du lac, where i write you these 'lines. everything was frozen, and yet it all appeared so beautiful. the lake, particularly, with its mantle of snow, resplendent in its whiteness, was to us a symbol of the stainless purity of our august lady, whose name it bears; and also of the purity of soul which should characterize the new inhabitants of these beautiful shores. our lodgings appeared to us-as indeed they are-but little different from those at st. peter's. we made haste to inspect all the various sites on the banks of the lake which had been so highly praised. yes, like little children, in spite of the cold, we went from one extremity to the other, perfectly enchanted with the marvelous beauties of our new abode. oh! may this new eden be ever the home of innocence and virtue!” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by father sorin moreau fye week five https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view). the example above shows that father sorin and his team of brothers had a very challenging and difficult journey to notre dame, but the beauty of the frozen land makes up for all of it. that goes to show that the road to success will not be easy, it will not be glamourous, and it will not be fun, but with hard work and dedication, anything is possible. notre dame is now one of the most elite schools in the nation, and that is in part of father sorin’s vision. so as long as i set out a strong vision for myself, anything is possible. i believe that i have been built up by my community to be a force for good in the world around me. in week 6 of moreau, we examined a poem by george ella lyon and were given the challenge of creating our own. in my personal poem, i stated, “i am from the forgotten farmland, from where the cornfields line all of the passing roads, i am from the kicked around dirt on the baseball field, and even lost in the bygone pages of historic library novels, i am from the small town of hamilton, indiana, finding the right pair of jeans and the perfect hat, brewing the hot morning coffee and climbing up the side of a truck, my first day on the job with my father, landscaping and construction was the occupation passed from generation to generation, the blue-collar life leading to great success a lifestyle that must be pursued within such a small town” (“roots of hamilton” by moreau fye week six https://docs.google.com/document/d/1542wgyjw4d07-98ujgmv94wb8wjivxwqrcn2yzsu9iw/edit). even though writing this poem was stressful to start, i found peace while writing it because it gave me the opportunity to look at where i came from. i am from a small, blue-collar town that is known for farming, agriculture, and landscaping. over time, i realized that staying in the small town doing farm work was not the lifestyle for me. i was brought up in a blue-collared family that built a foundation of hard work under me. since i knew what it took to be successful and make a difference, i am determined to make that impact on a bigger stage in the world. i believe that it is important to treat everyone equally and to not hold a stereotype against someone if they are different from yourself. in week 7 of moreau, we read through an article discussing implicit bias. as stated in the article, “when’s the last time a stereotype popped into your mind? if you are like most people, the authors included, it happens all the time. that doesn’t make you a racist, sexist or whatever-ist. it just means your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations. but the same thought processes that make people smart can also make them biased. this tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” (keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week seven https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/). it is extremely hurtful to view someone differently based on a stereotype that may be held for a specific person. a stereotype can be held based on a person’s race, religion, nationality, or even gender. so before jumping to conclusions, i open my heart to others and allow myself to connect with them on a personal level. obtaining a strong set of beliefs does not just happen overnight, but it comes after years and years of dedication and effort. a set of beliefs are formed at a young age, typically during the formative age of life, but college has given me the opportunity to strengthen, and even change some of my beliefs. my foundation of beliefs has gotten stronger and stronger each day while here at notre dame; however, i am always looking to better myself so my answer to “what do i believe in?” will always be getting better. moreau fyeintegration 1 google docs integration 2 integration moreau 12/3 what has allowed me to grow at nd in my first iteration, i explained how i wanted to be remembered as a person while at notre dame. i touched on what has shaped me before arriving here at notre dame. my family is what has shaped me and allowed me to become who i am today. now that i am away from my family and more independent, i need to see how my first summer and fall at notre dame have changed me for the better. in week 9, we discussed imposter syndrome and how this affects so many people regardless of age, race, background, etc. imposter syndrome is the idea of doubting yourself and your ability compared to others. this is something that if i do not keep a close eye on could affect me. playing football at notre dame and going to school with other very intelligent people often makes me want to compare myself to them. i sometimes feel that i have to be almost perfect in everything that i do. that is why i think this quote is so important: "the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)" (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine ). living up to expectations and being perfect is something that i am trying to do in my life. i need to be careful that this isn’t only what i focus on in life. having a dad who played in the nfl for 13 years created a lot to live up to. if i focused too much on the big picture and compared myself to him, i would destroy my confidence. instead, i focus very hard on taking football one day at a time. i focus on taking one thing in my game to improve every day and play. this allows me to focus on what is at hand now rather than the future or compare myself to my father. i focus on just worrying about my https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau grades and how i need to improve and learn in school. i know that i am not the smartest kid here, but that doesn't mean i can't work to try to be the smartest version of myself. that is what drives me every day in the classroom. in football, school, and life, it isn't about comparing myself to others; instead, it focuses on becoming better at one thing every day. in week 10, the thing that i focused on the most was the idea of hatred and division in this country. i believe that we are currently living in one of the most divided united states since the civil war. on both sides, they think that they are right and the other is drastically wrong. everyone focuses directly on their differences, and they struggle to find similarities in their beliefs. this is where i believe faith can play an important role. this quote to me stood out: "i believe your faith can have a transforming effect on the world." (“national cathedral” by mcallister-wilson moreau fye week ten). faith allows there to be a common ground. i know that there are multiple different forms of religion worldwide, but the majority live by the golden rule. that is to treat others how you want to be treated. if we can all grow closer to our faith and what we believe in, that will allow us to treat each other with more respect and enable the division and hatred to turn into unity and love, just like most religions call for. also, if we realize that there can be differences in our views but that doesn’t need to create division and hate. this relates to because i need to focus on allowing my faith to lead my words and actions. if i can live according to my faith, it will allow me to be a symbol of unity for others and an area for common ground. in week 11, we discussed community and the effect it plays on people. community is the ability to be a part of something. we need human interaction with others, and that is where the community is most important. the quote that stood out to me the most was: “we cultivate a capacity for connectedness through contemplation”(“thirteen ways of looking at community” https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ by parker palmer moreau fye week 11. ). we need the community so we can ask questions and bounce ideas off of each other. this allows not only us as individuals to grow but also as societies to grow. the community that i would say i am most deeply connected to is the football team, specifically in the offensive line group. we have a brotherhood and bond like something i have never been a part of. i know that i can trust everyone in my position room to have my back and know that i have there. that allows me to ask questions and be vulnerable because i trust them to not make fun of me or spread things that i say. this allows us as a group to have a strong respect for one another and allows us to play better because the trust that happens in conversation translates to the field. that is why i think everyone needs to be a part of some form of community. it creates confidence and trust for people that they can’t find anywhere else. in week 12, we discussed hope and what that means to each of us. hope is rooted in my faith. in class, i know we had a very long discussion about what hope is. for me, hope is rooted in my faith and has a more significant meaning than a day-by-day want or result. hope is rooted in god and the scripture that he has revealed to us. this quote reflects that: “his love for men, and his service being perfect freedom, is not mere propaganda, but an appalling truth” (“screw tape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). my faith isn’t just something that i want to happen, or maybe it is the truth. i know that what i have been taught through my faith and scripture is accurate and that i must listen and try to live by these examples and rules given to me. hope is essential when it comes to going to heaven. hope at that point is that i hope that i lived the best life according to my faith and teachings to go to heaven and be saved. overall, i have grown in two important ways since being at notre dame. the two areas i would categorize them is faith and football. my faith has grown by trusting in god and hoping for the best future. it has also grown by allowing it to become more independent and based on https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/pages/introduction-to-week-12-encountering-hope?module_item_id=106237 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/pages/introduction-to-week-12-encountering-hope?module_item_id=106237 my practices and beliefs. in football, i have grown through trusting the process one day at a time and having the brotherhood to fall back on with any problems. 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? the fourth learning objective of the fall 2021 moreau experience aims to direct students to “develop and pursue a vision of a life well-lived.” this learning objective stood out to me in particular because society both teaches and shows us multiple avenues and examples of what a “life well-lived” means in the modern-day world. rather than depending on social constructs, beliefs, and opinions on what a “life well-lived” truly means, in this course i would like to discover what a fulfilling, life will-lived means to me, and learn to accept that my path in life may not look the same as anyone else’s. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: how might one be vulnerable or authentic if they are a part of a community/society when parts of their identity are against the law? quote: “there’s only one variable that separates people who have a strong sense of love and belonging from those who really struggle for it. the people who have it believe that they are worthy of love and belonging.” this quote emphasizes and illustrates the struggle of imposter syndrome. many people, like myself, struggle with feeling like they are enough and worthy of what they have earned and find it difficult to accept their accomplishments and accolades. in a society where giving and service is valued, it is sometimes forgotten how important it is to take time and give back to yourself. self-love for many seems to come second to staying up late to finish schoolwork, taking an extra shift at work, and never settling for what you already have. brené brown reminds us that we can only give as much to others as we are willing to give to ourselves. it is important to remember that no matter how much we doubt ourselves and our abilities, we are worthy of what we have earned and the love and respect others have for us. comment: i was surprised by how much the brené brown ted talk on vulnerability resonated with me. the college application process highlighted my struggles with imposter syndrome and perfectionism. watching this video reminded me that i am not alone in my struggles, and i deserve the love from people around me and the achievements i have earned. moreover, this ted talk reminded me how important it is to continue to remember that progress is much more important than perfection, especially in the face of adversity and new experiences posed in college. no matter how far you go, it is important to remember and recognize how far you have come. integration two-neligan 1 mr. espeseth moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 the role of self-reflection in forming healthier habits, goals, and expectations in navigating internal and external dissonance, i have learned to take a step back and use my own experiences and core beliefs to shape my decisions rather than the influence of others. in coming to college, i have encountered many different instances of external dissonance. meeting people from drastically different backgrounds from mine sometimes caused me to question my own background and whether the things i had learned and the beliefs i had formed were really true. for example, when i heard students bad-mouthing my intended major, that caused a lot of self-doubt. i subsequently reevaluated why i had chosen that major in the first place and how i planned to use it after college. ultimately, after further researching my course of study and disregarding out what other students had said, i was able to embrace my major despite this external dissonance. in college, i have also come to form many expectations that were unrealistic due to the behavior of others. for example, following social media and being able to look out my window and see other students, i felt like i was constantly seeing what others were doing. this became overwhelming, as i felt like everyone else was doing so much more than me—getting more things done, achieving more, and even having more fun. i formed an unrealistic expectation for how i should be spending my time and how much i should be accomplishing in a day because i formed a false perception of what others were doing. in reality, it is likely true that every other student feels that they could be better maximizing their time. by talking with friends and classmates about their routines and the things they are doing, i was able to gain a better neligan 2 sense of how i should be scheduling myself and abandon my unrealistic expectations. the experience of dealing with external dissonance, and subsequent internal dissonance, relates to our reading and discussion of reevaluating our expectations. in her article about letting go of expectations, julia hogan discusses things her clients have said to her. she recounts “none of them tell me that they believe they are living a fulfilling life when they let their self-worth be defined by these external expectation...i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). hogan illuminates that almost everyone feels unfulfilled because they do not think they are living up to society’s expectations. she dismisses these expectations in pointing out that they are completely random and formed from how we perceive others rather than how things really are. hogan’s insights are important to remember in actively choosing to dismiss expectations that we form from comparing ourselves to others. in the future, i will take hogan’s advice and try to separate my expectations from the actions and achievements of others. rather, i will self-reflect, decide what i find most valuable, and prioritize that. i will also be more forgiving of myself and remember that not everyone is achieving as much as it might seem. trying to fix problems in our community can be difficult and divisive, causing people to become uncivil with each other. however, i have found that when it comes to solving problems, it is more efficient to work together rather than falling victim to polarization. when i first moved into my dorm in august, my three roommates and i all got along very well. however, over the next few weeks, we began to argue about the fate of the common room which we share. since our space is extremely limited, we were all very emotionally invested in what would become of the common room. everyone disagreed on how the room should be arranged, who should pay for what, and what the rules for the room would be. although we were very frustrated with each https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau neligan 3 other and our lack of progress, rather than allowing the situation to escalate, we met with our ra to discuss the issue. we were ultimately able to truly listen to each other’s wishes and create a compromise. however, we were only able to do this because we approached the conflict in a respectful and civil manner. if we had allowed ourselves to truly become angry at each other, we likely would not have resolved the conflict and created even more problems down the line. this experience closely relates to our discussion about how we should approach issues in our lives or in our community in a constructive and civil way. in his commencement speech, fr. john jenkins explained “if we are determined to keep our convictions free of malice, then i propose that we strive to meet one simple test for public discourse: our attempts to express our convictions should take the form of an effort to persuade…[but] people are not persuaded by those who attack their character” (wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). fr. jenkins’ advice is particularly insightful because people will be more likely to listen to our convictions if we try to persuade them rather than attack them. even if our beliefs are well-supported, people will not approach a conversation with an open mind if they feel they are being threatened. rather than advocating for our beliefs in a forceful and overbearing manner, we should try to pitch them in a way that is convincing. this will result in more productive conversations in which people are more willing to listen and open to changing their beliefs. in the future, i will follow fr. jenkins’ advice and the remember the lessons i learned in negotiating with my roommates to more effectively advocate my opinions and encourage civil discourse. in meeting new people, i have learned that first working on my own open-mindedness and acceptance of others is critical in forming meaningful relationships. notre dame’s academic rigor definitely cultivates a competitive atmosphere. because of this, in some of my classes, i https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ neligan 4 viewed my peers more so as competition rather than a potential friend. for example, because my calculus class is a huge lecture and heavily curved, it felt easy to isolate myself from the other students. i felt that i had to study alone to truly focus and was not making an effort to connect with my peers. however, in my calculus tutorial, we were divided into small groups to work on problem sets. as the weeks went by, i grew closer with my group members. we began to discuss subjects other than math and even made plans to get lunch together. although this connection was unexpected, it proved to me that even in situations where we want to isolate ourselves, we can almost always better from connecting with and learning with others. subsequent to this experience in my calculus class, i now view my peers as teammates rather than competition, and will strive to be more open to connecting with others in the future. this experience relates to our discussion on how effectively building communities starts with the individual. in his article about approaching community, parker j. palmer explains, “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness’—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). i agree with palmer that we cannot form relationships and a greater community unless we are willing to do so. forces like competitiveness, jealousy, greed, etc. easily obstruct our efforts to connect with others. if people were always close-minded and alienating of others, no meaningful communities would ever be formed. thus, it is important to work on one’s own “capacity for connectedness” and make an effort to reach out to and form bonds with others. keeping palmer’s advice and my own experience in mind, in the future, i will remind myself of my obligation to remain open to connection and also make a concerted effort to form relationships with others. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ neligan 5 in witnessing happy endings to overwhelmingly bad situations, i have learned to commit to hope even when i am prone to pessimism. in my first semester in college, i have encountered many situations in which i felt powerless and that nothing was in my control. during these times, having no hope seemed to be the default. it seemed that i was merely faking any feelings of hope. however, one particular experience changed my perspective on hope and has caused me to more genuinely embrace it. when one of my friends was in an accident on campus, i did everything i could to try to help her. ultimately, the paramedics arrived, and they told us that only one person was allowed to go with my friend. one of my other friends went with her, so i was left wondering what was going to happen to my friend and if she was going to be alright. since things were completely out of my hands at that point, i felt that there was nothing for me to do other than hope. i continued to hope and pray for the best until i heard back that she was in a stable condition. this experience, while scary, caused me to cling to hope when i had nothing else. our discussion about having hope because god can always bring about good from bad situations reminded me of this experience in particular. in his introduction to the holy cross education, fr. james b. king urged, “there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). fr. king explains that because god can right any wrong and bring about gifts at any moment, we should always live with hope. rather than focusing on the failures, humiliation, and anger, we should be optimistic that god will reward us with gifts and that ultimately we will experience victory. considering fr. king’s advice and my newfound https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ neligan 6 hopefulness, i will in the future be more optimistic about whatever situation i am in and focus on the potential good outcomes rather than the bad ones. moreau integration 2 redefining life’s definitions the notre dame journey has largely been one of self-discovery. away from our families, hometown friends, and everything we grew up with, we have been given an opportunity to find who we truly are. without expectations of who we were before, we can take risks and get out of our comfort zone. we can try new things, meet new people, and become the absolute best and most genuine version of ourselves. in this manner, college is a truly unique chance to work on self-development. even more so, notre dame provides a community and culture in which improvement and growth is encouraged. throughout my time at notre dame, i have come to reconsider some of the most important facets of my life, such as my future in medical school, my political views, and my identity as a student and person. the day after christmas in 2017, my dad experienced heart failure. without the amazing care he received throughout his numerous procedures and surgeries, he would not be alive today. from this moment on, i wanted to be a doctor. i envisioned myself as a neurosurgeon, saving and prolonging the lives of people like my water polo coach, who suffered from brain cancer for years before eventually passing. i never even thought of exploring other career options; i was focused on a singular path and was determined to get there. however, throughout this semester at notre dame, i have begun to reconsider my true reasons for going into the medical field and the steps it takes to get there. as i attempt to solidify my future, i have only come up with more questions. will i truly be able to help others the way i want in the current state of the medical system? are the many years of graduate school and residency worth the job satisfaction? do i truly want to be a doctor, or am i just trying to prove myself to my parents or to myself? am i doing this for external validation or for my internal drive to improve the world around me? i have talked about these questions extensively with one of the best friends i have made here, as we are in very similar positions. there is a stigma within our families and the general society that dropping out of a stem major is a failure on our part, rather than a discerning of our true passions. as hogan emphasizes, expectations are detrimental to our self-esteem and our long-term happiness (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). as such, i have worked to rid myself of these expectations and open myself to any and all experiences. together, we have talked about how the current state of medicine is focused more on efficiency and profit, rather than patient care and connections. we have discussed how we find our module on blindness and neurology fascinating, but our chemistry class difficult and less interesting. as 18-year-olds, we have so much to discover. i am sure that as time goes on, we will discern if this is the correct path and where we belong in life. as of now, i still hold a love for science and hope to continue studying how neurons form every single one of our actions. one of the most difficult things to accept has been that i do not know everything about my future, and that is okay. some things are not meant to make sense right now, and i am making peace with that. while at notre dame, i have also encountered people with a wide variety of views, many of which are different from mine. in my hometown, i largely had the same views as the people around me in regards to politics, social concerns, and activism. furthering this confirmation bias, i tended to make friends with people with similar views as me and our conversations about politics often centered about how we couldn’t understand the other side. here at notre dame, there is a much greater diversity of thought and i have made friends with people from all over the political spectrum. we have had long conversations about our perspectives, and i feel that we have all learned from each other and come to better understand different viewpoints; personally, i feel much more open to truly listening and attempting to understand. my ideas and opinions that were once cut and dry are now far more fluid and open to change. i no longer have the same animosity that i felt in high school towards the “opposite” end of the political spectrum, and i have come to realize that the two-party system is not the most effective one for our country. as father jenkins shared in his 2012 commencement address, we must “co-operate for [our] common good.” (wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by father john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week ten) the only way for our country to truly make progress is to listen to each other without the intent of lashing back, and to realize that helping the least fortunate is furthering our nation as a whole. in high school, my life centered around success in academics. i was known as “the smart white girl,” and i took on this identity as being intelligent and good at school. being “smart” became integral to how i thought of myself not only as a student, but also as a human being. upon entering college and being surrounded by students of similar and greater intellectual levels, as well as taking much more intense classes with more difficult material, i have had to re-evaluate this identity. i was no longer one of the smartest in the room, and while this has been amazing because i have been able to learn so much from my peers, it has also been a time of intense self-reflection. when it appeared that i would get my first “b” in a class, suddenly i questioned who i was. i didn’t know if i had changed from high school or if i had never been that intelligent in the first place. over the course of this semester, i have learned that neither of those things are true; i simply had so many expectations and pressures to unlearn in order to become my best self. i have had to build an identity outside of academics and redefine where i fit in this community. while of course i still greatly care about academics and work hard for success in my classes, i now know that i am more than my grades. i aim to be a good friend, to be involved in the community, to help others, to make people laugh, and to generally be a force for good in the world. the competitive community of my high school definitely enforced and encouraged my identity as a smart person, but i’ve found that the notre dame community is more about educating the person as a whole and improving all aspects of ourselves. for this, i have been grateful, and i hope to continue to grow as a person throughout my time here. i can only dream that the next four years will be as eye-opening and fulfilling as this semester has been. the university of notre dame has done such an amazing job at welcoming the freshman with open arms and encouraging us to better ourselves and the world around us. i have learned far more than i could ever imagine, and i will take this knowledge with me as i go through my future. integration 10/12/21 theo helm the man in the mirror through my time in moreau so far, i’ve enjoyed taking a look inward at my beliefs and how these shape my identity. while i feel that i still have a lot to figure out, i do have a few core beliefs that i will always stand by. from these, i can take on the challenge of my life while constantly making adjustments along the way. these five core beliefs give me a framework that i can always lean back on when i’m in doubt. hopefully, they will push me to be a high character person that i can be proud of. i believe that i should let my guard down more often and share my true emotions and feelings with those around me. if i can achieve this vulnerability, i feel like my life would be more fulfilling, even if it is much harder to open up than to keep things to myself. just as this is true for myself, it is also true for what people need in general. after years of researching people, dr. brown stated in her ted talk that, “they had connection—and this was the hard part—as a result of authenticity” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). although i feel that i’m usually an authentic person, there are times when i try to be a certain version of myself that fits what i want others to think of me. putting on this “best face of myself” can be necessary when first meeting people, but if i really want to make connections i need to reveal all of my personality, including the parts i’m proud of and even what i’m ashamed of. reaching this vulnerability is easier said than done, but since i want to make real, lasting connections here in college i will have to keep working on it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be i believe that my own opinion of myself matters more than what others think about me. my grandpa has always told me that at the end of the day, the man in the mirror is the only one who really counts. this means that no matter what external accomplishments we make or the people we impress, none of it matters if we can’t look ourselves in the eye and be proud of the person looking back at us. this message is what i try to live by every day, and hope to remember even in the drastic ways that life can change. my grandpa’s message is closely connected to david brooks’ comparison of adam 1 and adam 2. if we always put our adam 1, or our “resume values,” above our adam 2, or “eulogy values,” then how will we ever be the fulfilled and happy people we want to be? (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) despite the fact that our lives are centered around our adam 1 persona, including going to school, participating in extracurriculars, and keeping up a good reputation, we should always develop adam 2 along the way. i can develop adam 2 by taking the time for introspection, which includes praying and meditating every day and setting broader goals in life than just the societal measures of success. i still want to do well academically and get a good job, but what really matters is that i’m satisfied with myself no matter how my adam 1 is doing. i believe that god exists and that he is what i should ultimately be focused on in my life. coming here to notre dame, i wasn’t sure how going to a school with such a strong catholic identity would affect me, and although i’m still not completely sure, i do know this faith will always be part of my identity. as i continue on this journey, i will continue going to dorm masses, spending time at the grotto, and doing some self-reflection to discern what i believe and how i should go about my life. my experiences remind me of what father pete said in his video, that “such a journey requires a framework that challenges our modern understanding of the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim meaning of life” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week three). as i work to develop this framework, i need to remember that it could very well go against what society expects. if this is the case, i should follow what i believe and what i am guided by in my faith. one way that my faith and relationship with god can be strengthened is by my interactions with my friends. my goal at notre dame is to develop healthy, lifelong relationships that encourage growth. this is a lofty standard because it takes a special bond for friends to feel like they “can be themselves with each other” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). as i progress through college, i will continually reevaluate my relationships to make sure they are sustainable and help both sides grow. i believe that i’m called to do good because of all that i’ve been blessed with. this belief takes me to the phrase, “to whom much is given, much will be required” from luke 12:48 in the bible. with the education that i have been provided and all the amazing ways my parents have sacrificed for me, it is only right that i go and help others in return. while i’m currently involved in some weekly service, it will take time to think of major ways i can leave an impact. it certainly helps to be at notre dame, “one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country,” according to father sorin (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). i hope to tap into this spirit of doing good and hold onto it for the rest of my life. although i don’t know how i plan to serve others, this doesn’t really matter as long as i have this goal and the intention of completing it. the conclusion of my “where i’m from” poem circles back to this idea of uncertainty and refusing to let it stop me. i end my poem with, “i’m from not knowing the path that lies ahead, but only knowing that it is worth taking, one step at a time” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). for this journey, the destination is not yet known, but i can still get started on my path to doing good for others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://docs.google.com/document/d/1nqhspqko4evm_ico7ra-lap7lgwk0c-xk1s-zunghac/edit?usp=sharing i believe that i have a lot to learn from my classmates, professors, and everyone i meet. attending this university gives me the chance to talk to people from so many different places and with so many different ideas, so it would be stupid not to take the time to hear others’ perspectives while i’m here. when conversing with these people, i need to leave my implicit biases out of it because everyone has their own unique story to tell. i should avoid having the same experiences as adichie shared in her ted talk, because when she was surprised how productive the town of guadalajara, mexico was, “[she] remembers first feeling slight surprise. and then, [she] was overwhelmed with shame” (“danger of a single story” by adichie moreau fye week seven). although implicit biases are difficult to avoid altogether, i need to do my best to hear people for who they truly are rather than what i think about them going into a conversation. from talking to people about their outlooks on life, strategies for success, and different backgrounds, i can learn more about myself in the process and how i should approach my own life. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story anderson integration 4 anderson 1 cultivating a well-lived life college is wonderful for a lot of reasons. i have made new friends, learned to live semi-alone, and have gotten the chance to partake in high-level academic discussions. however, the only downside to some of these good things is that it can be a bit overwhelming. there are so many amazing subjects to devote time to, whether it be voting rights, women’s rights, nonviolent resistance, immigration reform, or geopolitics in the middle east. the wonderful variety can also scramble what i previously thought i wanted to focus on in my life to make sure it is well-lived. this academic year has led me to recognize the importance of having a general mission statement to guide my life in its path to being well-lived (“mission statement” by olivia anderson moreau fye week thirteen). overall, my mission of a well-lived life consists of helping make the world a better place, learning as much as i can about other people and their points of view, and showing others that it is alright–and even encouraged–to admit vulnerability. my mission in life in order to live a life well-lived includes making the world a better place as much as i can. i have always believed that, if i have a certain skill set, i am obligated to use it to help others (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). in my case, i want to use my skills in public speaking and discourse in order to advocate for those that are marginalized by society at large (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i might run into issues with this part of my mission, particularly in those that have different ideas than mine. overcoming this roadblock requires me to recognize that people may disagree with me, but put my goals ahead of my pride. disagreement and collaboration towards a shared goal are not mutually exclusive (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). in fact, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1y2xjdx-jxqwi6npqfzijcd5lgmmdrbg2avb4druwbho/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145669 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145669 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 anderson 2 disagreement forces me to consider more perspectives, allowing for a more effective solution to be found. i also want to expose myself to new people and ideas as a part of my mission to live a well-lived life. most people, including myself, are put in echo chambers by social media algorithms or the social circles they inhabit (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by professor paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). these echo chambers limit the amount of information one is exposed to, so people sometimes cannot access new types of people or points of view. one specific example revolves around how i am exposed to racism. as a white woman from a predominately white town, my “socialization [rendered me] racially illiterate” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). even though i tried to take the initiative to learn and had parents that were actively anti racist, i am not always racially aware because i have not been exposed to certain ideas or concepts regarding race and racialization. the best way to break these echo chambers is to make a deliberate effort to expose myself to new information and ideas (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). a well lived life is one that is in constant pursuit of knowledge, which can then lead to breaking down judgements of people i may disagree with or have preconceived notions about (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). less judgements of other people leads to even more possible sources of information to consume. therefore, the aspect of my mission in life dealing with exposure to new information comes right back to the start. all of the new information gained will shape me into a better person and shape my life into one that is better lived (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ anderson 3 living a life well lived also includes showing others that vulnerability can be a good thing. when i was in high school, i was extremely anxious. i also felt like i could not reach out to other people because i equated vulnerability with weakness (“week 5 discernment activity” by moreau fye week five). however, i realized that a life well lived requires me to give myself a bit of a break (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). if i was able to tell my younger self to give myself some grace and lean on others, i would in a heartbeat (“a letter to the past” by moreau fye week eight). it is now part of my mission in life to advocate for that same realization in others. vulnerability is a good thing. nobody has all the answers. even when people actively try to reflect on their lives, they may not dive deep enough or only tell themselves what they want to hear (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week six). it takes a lot of vulnerability to admit that and it is extremely difficult. therefore, i want to set the example for others by keeping my habits of vulnerability in front of others. sometimes, all someone needs is to see someone else being vulnerable to spark their own journey to comfortable vulnerability. setting this example would also force me to continue to be vulnerable, improving my well lived life. facets of my mission of a well lived life includes making the world a better place, exposing myself to new information and ideas, and continuing to be vulnerable while helping others with the same goal. improving the world through my various skills and coming together with people i disagree with initially will uplift the voices of marginalized communities. exposing myself to new perspectives will break echo chambers, allowing me to access new information. that knowledge allows for the promotion of a life well lived, as more information increases quality of life. in the new acquisition of knowledge, i will also be less biased against https://docs.google.com/document/d/1enimkell1re4ymblnyx9hga7imz8tvvmk5xkxt8usq0/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/14nwdqeakdj69ckavsckcka6gc1iapbctu1wfzdd8v6c/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ anderson 4 others, as i will have more information about their experiences. a life well lived also includes vulnerability and the promotion of vulnerability in others. nobody knows everything, so having that vulnerability allows for less anxiety in general. i have a duty to help others in their quest to be vulnerable because i have been at the beginning of the journey and it is extremely difficult. overall, a life well lived is one that helps others in as many ways as possible while bringing in as much knowledge as i can. everything else will fall into place. microsoft word moreau first year integration.docx moreau first year integration what do i believe? beliefs are always innately particular to each individual – commonly because of their personal circumstances. personal circumstances trace out the path that will guide one to discover what they believe in and why they chose too, being the reason why people believe what they believe in. i can say that for myself it has been no different, as personal circumstances helped forge my moral compass which has always guided me to find what i truly believe in. since my upbringing i have always had a strong and loving relationship with my family. from a young age my fondest memories have been with my family members, not only my direct family but also my cousins, grandparents’ uncles, and aunts. coming from a big family the seemingly “unsurmountable” number of cousins helped me learn many virtues that are helping me deeply over my time in college. i have learnt values that help me out in my daily life, a family background has helped create a lens through which i see the world in a nurturing and loving manner always trying to see the positive side of things. from the stories i have lived with my family i can easily assert that i believe in optimism and happiness not only because of my background but because of all the positive things that have come out of my positive approach towards life. not only circumstances but stories i have heard from past generations and stories which came from memories i made with my family. within positivity there are several believes which i cherish – i believe that i forge life-giving relationships through compassion, humour, and forgiveness. those 3 beliefs have helped me not only help myself but help others which is something i truly cherish. in week 5 we listened to the commencement speech by laetare medallist carla harris, and she said that “we are blessed so that we can be a blessing to others”. this particularly struck me as i recalled on my core beliefs, and i believe that i grow by a similar purpose and that i am responsible for spreading joy through humour and compassion. harris explores the notion of generosity of spirit something which i’ve perceived as incremental within the notre dame experience. she cites that one must “treat others in a way that i want to be treated” – reminding me of one of notre dame’s incentives towards students which i heard in my first week here, to help others in any way that you can, even if it is a small action, you can make a difference. ms. carla harris’ is a true example of how to lead through kindness and positivity, which i truly admire, and she represents the spirit of notre dame perfectly. compassion, generosity, and humour help make life light, and relationships fun forgiveness is the glue that helps hold those relationships together in moments of disdain. thus, i believe in those core beliefs because of personal circumstances and life situations which helped me understand the benefits of a familiar approach in ones hodiern life. one piece of content that stood out to me was chimamanda ngozi’s ted talk regarding the danger of a single narrative. within her talk she explains this danger by evidencing it through literature. she discusses the nature of a eurocentric version of literature surmounting african narratives. the story was particularly meaningful as i recalled the danger of one-sided stories and its addon’s to misinformation. over my time in notre dame, i have developed a close connection with a brazilian friend group. the group has recently had a moment of disdain because of a one-sided story and misinformation – which helped me reflect of the dangers embedded within this problem, something i had learnt in moreau. during this situation, i looked towards my core beliefs and recalled on what to use to help combat this issue. the answer was compassion and forgiveness. it was through those beliefs that i realized i could fix this issue. even if measured i also appealed towards humour who is essential in tough times. in week 4 we studied the search for life giving relationships and the danger of toxic relationships. i thought this section has a particular connection with the integration as a true relationship is based upon belief – and it is common that a relationship will be held with someone who shares similar beliefs such as faith and passion. the four content pieces of that week’s study evidenced the dangerousness of toxicity within relationships one can have. the content instigated me to reflect about my current relationships, if any of them had any toxicity and if so, how could i fix it for the sake of my personal wellbeing and that of others. the handout from the red flag campaign illustrated the traits of healthy and unhealthy relationships. one particular trait stood out to me which i really appreciate and strive to live by it, which is humour. the belief may seem unconventional at first as it isn’t what one would consider the centre of relationship as superficially it escapes the conventional aspects of kindness, trust, and love. though at a deeper perspective it is evident that it is the glue that holds a relationship together. i see humour as a counter agent to toxicity, as it can optimize the conduction of a relationship in a more playful manner. as i mentioned before i strive to approach life through a positive manner and humour is the best way to do so. even though i see humour as a blessing and oftentimes helpful i sometimes overuse it and construct unnecessary situations. the main attribute of humour is that it is different for every person – meaning that not all will find the same thing humorous. thus, i have had some issues even if minor with this here at notre dame. notre dame is a cultural melting pot which gathers people from all the corners of the globe. this means that my peerage boasts a myriad of variations of humour. a few times i have issued jokes which weren’t funny for those who heard, and i felt the compulsion to apologize – fortunately no one was offended, and the relationship wasn’t severed. even though this belief of mine has created some impasses my humour has really opened doors for me and helped me make positive relationships and friends whom i’m sure are for life even if it is sometimes misconstruing. my beliefs have also had an impact in my search for belonging at notre dame, as an international student i am in a new and unfamiliar environment which presents many issues who are foreign to me. though trusting my innate beliefs and being myself has helped me truly connect with people whom i have now made meaningful connections. i have met people with similar humour and even those who share a strong familiar background pertaining a nurturing and caring approach to a friendship. during an in-class discussion a peer stated that “the average notre dame student is friendly, and extremely easy to get along with” – after being here for almost 2 months i fully agree with this statement and am truly grateful for the connections i have made thus far. moreover, i believe that this search for belonging is directly associated with authenticity which we’ve studied in week 2. the goal to find yourself and where you belong can only be properly achieved if you are true to yourself as an authentic individual. the eulogy within week 2’s commentary highlighted how to find one self-authentic version demonstrating that it can even be a contrasting one – giving the example of it being humble and ambitious. for many finding one’s truth is based in one core believe which is faith. i am having a troubled period in figuring out my faith and what i believe in when it comes to it. though during week 3’s moreau assignment i reflected upon how can an individual who is not from a background of faith make use of it to inform how they see the world? which pertains to me. i particularly have not come from a background of faith and thus have not been as exposed yet to elements of faith that guide many of my peers. despite this factor i’m keeping an open mind and am ready to learn about faith and be informed on how it will model the way i see the world. from all that was read during this study it is possible to conclude that faith is essential to inform an individual on how they see the world as it is the lens through which will shape the focal point of their journey. faith not only guides us, but it empowers and informs to teach us that the greatest journey is one of self-discovery. i learnt that you don’t have to be religious to have faith, and now i believe that i need faith to pursue my own truth. overall, from all that has been studied and my experiences in notre dame i believe that i have grown as a person. i learned life lessons in less than 2 months. i now believe that i search for both success and happiness, not only for me but also for those i care about, i shall make use of my core beliefs to help me thrive in this journey. moreau-integration one 14 october 2021 “i’m not afraid anymore!” how college has shown me i’m braver than i thought. i am eight weeks deep into the strangest experience of my life, and i’m doing better than i had hoped. sitting outside south quad in the rain, watching the sun set over a tree covered path, i struggle to accept that i have been given a chance to call this place home. i feel like i’m at summer camp; i keep waiting for the day i must return home. this place feels like a dream, and it’s not because i’m overtired. this place is gorgeous and filled with life and a sense of peace very similar to the feeling i get when i am around god. a rainbow appears as i write this, which i think proves my point even more: there’s no way this place is real. i only recently realized that i get to be here for four years, and i like who i am becoming already. i am surviving my classes, settling into clubs, and making lifelong relationships. i am not taking the greatest care of myself, so i am still sick and have fallen into a “college depression”, but something about this place makes me very happy. walking around campus, finding secret study spots in and outside of hesburgh, and even studying with a friend group after calculus iii, i am overcome with serenity and a feeling very similar to joy and belonging. i have found someone that makes me truly happy, and i have found a small interest of mine turning into an unexpected minor. i am doing all these things in a place i’ve never been and with people i’ve never met. before applying to notre dame, i knew that i needed a new place independent from my family and my past, but i did not understand how much i needed this place. i expected to be terrified by now. i came to college terrified of parties and of ruining my health and of being alone. i had just exited a painful relationship and reckoned with the trauma, and i was worried that i would be taken advantage of or be too scared to ever heal. i thought i couldn’t be vulnerable or express myself around anyone and expected to be lost in the crowds within a month. i was very wrong. i have found a few small groups to express my interests and sexuality comfortably and have found time for some deep reflection of my past and present. i realize that “i’m not afraid anymore!” to quote a popular christmas movie. i believe that i am searching for a place where i can shed my skin, mature, and figure out who i am. i believe that my purpose now is to do just that, to give my focus to this place so i may come out of it a stronger and deeper individual. i believe that i can do this by throwing myself into notre dame and devoting all my efforts here, and by looking back at my time at notre dame and before i chose the dome. in starting to become who i am, i realized that i am searching for a place where i can shed my skin, mature, and figure out who i am. one of the main reasons i chose notre dame was that people here seem to be really happy. after senior year, i really wanted to feel that happy and proud of something. i got pretty depressed because of covid and past relationship trauma and had resulted to just living day by day, void of any strong emotion, because all i wanted to do was survive without pain and vulnerability during my last year at high school. i understood then that i had been in a toxic relationship and avoiding thinking about it. after i graduation, i got tired of it. i wanted so badly to be happy that i finally decided to allow myself to. i felt shallow, so i let down my walls. i knew that i had to do this to be happy, for “you cannot selectively numb emotion.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i wore my favorite outfits, i initiated activities, i started to write music again, and it helped. i even started to have fun in calculus, where i oddly enough have also learned vulnerability. my best friends are in that class and so i can be vulnerable with them, and our teacher has made us swear to come to extra help if we feel uncomfortable with materials, which requires us to let down our guard and admit we have a problem. i have learned so much about myself in these two months. it makes sense i would be happy in a challenging school, my top two strengths in the via survey were curiosity and love of learning, just below kindness (via survey moreau fye week two). funny enough though, now that i am happy again, i am focused on school, but i would rather continue to figure out who i am as an adult, and build up my eulogy, not my academic resume. (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreau fye week two). it makes me feel deeper as a person and i realize how badly i wanted to learn who i was independent from home. i plan to continue this growth by making sure to stay open to vulnerability. i also believe that as of now, my college years, my purpose is to figure out how i am as an adult. these past couple months, i have felt like a different person. i constantly have that feeling of spiritual serenity. i had grown out of touch with my faith, and while i was excited to come back to it, i didn’t realize that i was meant to reconnect with him. this feeling tells me that i am in the right place, doing the right things, and so i continue to be here and cultivate myself. i certainly never expected it but i agree that “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god” (“faith brings light to a dark world,” by david fagerberg moreau week three). i was definitely brought here to learn who i am as a person, and i know this because being here made me realize i was trying to do this in high school without complete success. i really want to experience the people here. i have grown up in a place where a lot of people think alike, and that is dangerous when i’m trying to learn what i believe. i learned early on in life that i was experienced a “single story,” and i knew that i needed to see several to grow properly (“the danger of a single story” by adichiemoreau fye week seven). i was scared that i would grow to believe in the things that are stereotypically associated with my hometown. i know realize i was scared because i had already stared to identity contradicting core beliefs. i was less scared of it because i made an effort to experience different viewpoints. notre dame is great because people here come from all over, and even though a lot of us are catholics, there are still many different stories. to mature and figure out who i am, as well as shedding my skin and gaining confidence, i believe that i have to throw myself at notre dame, but i also believe that reflection is necessary. i have already begun to do so, and i have grown a lot. i have joined the rocketry team and joined a squad that i didn’t expect i would want to join, but i have dedicated myself to it, and it helps me decided what i want to pursue in engineering. surprisingly to me, i am comfortable going to office hours just to chat with my professors. i thought that throwing myself into this place would be hard, but i have become a confident person and am moving through these strange times with a sense of strength. i expected to get lost here, i was so scared that i wouldn’t be able to become part of the notre dame family. but this school has stressed that i am welcome, giving me a chance to participate. i have teachers and peers explicitly telling and showing me how welcome here i am. the best example of this is my sociology professor. i took her class as a fun breadth requirement, and decided i really enjoyed it. she has made me feel welcome in a class of mostly upperclassmen and made sure i didn’t get lost in the background. one day, i timidly asked her a question about sociology and psychology. she enthusiastically explained the difference and pointed me towards additional resources. her support allowed to throw myself into her class and be brave enough to make the decision to pursue a minor in sociology. people here really work to make sure everyone here in part of the notre dame family. “and because we will work to be family, every one of you is necessary” (two notre dames: your holy cross education, father grovemoreau fye week five). knowing this, i can confidently contribute to the notre dame family by throwing myself into its community and learning about myself and how to raise my comfort levels along the way. comment by : 1-, 2-, 3-, 4-, 5-, 6, 7in high school, i was in a toxic relationship. it really hurt me, and i was scared coming here it would inhibit my time here. after i came to notre dame, once i was distant from it, i barely thought of it after a few weeks. in fact, i have openly talked about comfortably, hoping to spread awareness to comfort to those in similar situations. i am being green dot certified because i want to be as prepared as possible to help prevent any unhealthy incidences, just like our week four video tells us to do ("it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" moreau fye week four). i believe i was brought to notre dame to use my story the way i am meant to, to help others and to be strong for my peers who cannot be strong yet. in terms of reflection on my past, i have done a lot of that too outside of considering my last relationship. a couple of weeks ago, i was comparing pictures of me today and three years ago. 2018 me was happy and bubbly, incredibly innocent and undamaged. knowing my fears and what i have been through, i expected 2021 me to just look ugly and broken. looking at the pictures though, something shocked me. i wasn’t beautiful, but i was content with the way i looked. i didn’t look scared either. there was a deep sense of maturity in my eyes, the eyes of someone who has been through a lot but come out stronger, not weaker, because of it. without thinking, i spoke aloud “i love her.” i have done a lot of reflection on my toxic relationship and my life at home, and i feel a deep sense of pride in how far i have come, and surprise at how i have turned my journey into a story of power. i have taken where i have come from and let it influence who i am (“where i’m from” by me & “where i’m from” by george lyon, moreau fye week six). needless to say, i thought i had myself figured out before, and i thought coming here would throw a wrench in that. i thought i was a scared individual, but i have come out of my shell here, and i have discovered my capabilities to be brave. i am grown into my strength and realized i have been open to vulnerability and i grown as a deeper individual. i take pride in myself and in helping, growing and learning with my peers. i believe i am a strong individual, who has used her hardships to her and others benefit, and i believe i needed a place such as notre dame to show me that. after everything, i believe i am home. 12/2/2021 imperfection when i first came to notre dame, my future seemed vague and unclear. i knew my goal: to become an orthopedic surgeon like my father. however, i had no knowledge of the intermediate steps. i looked at life like a checklist, and on the checklist were a couple of simple, yet time-consuming goalsdeceptively simple for their true difficulty. get a 4.0 gpa. do well on the mcat. graduate from college. go to medical school. get published in a few scientific papers. get into an orthopedic residency program. the final checkmark, so to speak, was to be successful. by checking off all of the boxes on the checklist, i would attain success. however, i had never imagined the difficulty of these steps. i had breezed through high school, not having to study outside of class. having joined the glynn family honors program, the difficulty of my college classes eclipsed my high school classes by a great margin. the dissonance between my past expectations and my unfortunate reality troubled me greatly. i recalled a high school friend who had taken many ap classes but struggled with the coursework, earning bs or cs on her transcript. although i sympathized with her situation, i failed to understand her reasons. now having been placed in her shoes, falling short of what i wanted, i could understand her pain. it felt like drowning. surviving ruthless stem lectures along with incomprehensible honors classes felt like flailing my arms through the water with all of my might. no matter what, i was determined to keep my head out of my water. no matter what, i was determined to succeed, stubborn enough to cling to my checklist and my prior ideals. with all of my effort, taking advantage of every opportunity available to me, i barely kept my head afloat, not enough to achieve the 4.0 i wanted, but a great improvement from my midterm grade report. disappointed with myself, i called my mother. i could feel the water filling my lungs. neutrally, she asked me why i had wanted to achieve a 4.0 gpa in the first place. i told her that having a high gpa was advantageous for medical school admissions. she calmly-no, almost emotionlessly repeated the question. sensing her tone, i considered the question, all of its implications and weight rolling in my mind. why did i want to achieve a 4.0 gpa so badly? certainly, a high gpa would be helpful for medical school, but my current gpa would still qualify as good. the cause for my choking, burning disappointment wasn’t a perceived disadvantage in my ultimate goal. rather, as julia horgan notes, it was my belief that i “must be perfect,” a failure to “live up to the expectations of others and [myself].” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia gordon – moreau fye week 9) my mother understood this, and by questioning me, she hoped that i would realize this myself. the water filling my lungs wasn’t borne out of external pressure. it wasn’t borne out of homework, lectures, or midterms. it wasn’t even borne out of bad college grades. rather, the pressure i was placing on myself was the source of the water. when i answered my mother, and grasped the root of my problem, the ever-rising water slowly drained away. the choking pressure disappeared, almost like it had never been there in the first place. i couldn’t see my mother’s face, but i could hear a smile in my mother’s voice. having finally encountered a solution, i felt hope. i was reminded of c. s. lewis’s screwtape letters. “[humanity’s] approach to constancy is undulationthe repeated return of a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks.” (the screwtape letters by c. s. lewis – moreau fye week 12) this situation was one such trough. however, i had confronted my troubles at its root, and could begin climbing up back to a peak. i was not the only one struggling with a dissonance in their beliefs. when i started college, my little brother started high school. 1,100 miles away from home, i struggled to help my little brother through the transition. ever since childhood, my little brother has felt a pressure to live up to the academic “standards” i set. i hid the checklist from my family, worrying that my brother would be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 pushed into fulfilling its demands as well. everyday i called my family, and i noticed that something felt off about my little brother. one day, i asked him what was wrong. he told me that he was struggling in academics as well. he wanted to get as in all of his classes, but struggled to achieve his goal. copying my mother’s example, i asked him why he wanted to get as in all of his classes. reluctantly, he admitted that he didn’t want to do worse than me in academics. this made sense. my parents probably expected him to do as well as i did in high school, and his competitive spirit simply wouldn’t allow him to do worse. i told him about my experiences. his face, twisted with frustration, softened as i talked. by the time i was finished, a light smile graced his face. i think he was relieved to have someone to share his experiences with. “self-success is a mirage,” and everyone needs “other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” (“thirteen ways of looking at a community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11) i was just glad to be that person for my little brother. over the past semester, i’ve encountered many challenges. overcoming the dissonance between my expectations and the reality of college life was one of the biggest challenges i have encountered yet. however, i hope to go into the next semester with renewed determination. i’m reminded of kintsugi, the “japanese art form that repairs broken pottery with gold.” (“women finds healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto – moreau fye week 10). there will be imperfections in my life, and not everything will work out the way i want it to. however, just like the gold imperfections in kintsugi shine through the work, the imperfections in my life make it beautiful. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau moreau integration #2 richardson 1 professor taylor fys 10101-31 30 november 2021 the most transformative four months of my life: my growth at notre dame thus far in my first semester here at the university of notre dame, i have grown as a person. i have grown more mature in living on my own for the first time and taking on the various responsibilities associated with doing so. i have become more selfless and willing to compromise through the rewarding experience i have had of living in a quad with three roommates (as opposed to home, where i am an only child and have always had a room to myself). i have also become more aware of my true desires in life, which include my desire to make positive changes within my community and the world during my time here at notre dame and beyond. this semester has provided me with lots of learning opportunities, both academically and personally, and the moreau first year experience has provided me with both. this semester has afforded me the opportunity to consider what i want from life. i have often lived my life based on others’ expectations of me. in high school, that felt particularly true as i constantly tried to live up to various teachers’ expectations of me. however, now, in college, i have had the chance to consider what my own expectations of myself are. i have always been a people-pleaser, and i probably will be for a very long time, but i am trying to only place my own expectations upon me and to be more patient with myself and forgiving of myself. in accordance with what julia hogan says in her article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”, disappointing others has always felt crushing to me because i have been measuring my success richardson 2 according to others’ metrics (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). now, i am trying to define my success by my own metrics more so i will feel more fulfilled. this semester, i have considered what i want from life, and my desire to help resolve certain problems facing my community in my home state of kentucky and the world at large has strengthened. there are numerous difficulties facing every community, including the notre dame community, and unfortunately, i cannot solve all of them. however, even trying to solve one problem is worthy work. by trying to bridge gaps between people and facilitate conversations between people who might have many differences, problems can be approached and solved. however, this is only possible if people are willing to cooperate with each other. like parker j. palmer describes in his article “thirteen ways of looking at community”, it is not required or reasonable to expect that everyone in a community will become extremely close with each other, but people in a community need to be connected by some common value, object, space, or other concept in order for the community to function and prosper and in order for the challenges facing that community to be resolved (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). at home in kentucky, i hope to help facilitate conversations regarding healthcare inequity within my home state. people in eastern kentucky lack affordable, quality healthcare compared to the more plentiful healthcare resources available in central and western kentucky. part of this is due to a lack of infrastructure in eastern kentucky, with all of kentucky’s quality research hospitals in the central or western parts of the state and with many areas in eastern kentucky even lacking internet service, which eliminates the possibility of telehealth visits, as well. i want to help resolve this healthcare disparity by https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ richardson 3 advocating for improved infrastructure and the construction of quality research hospitals in eastern kentucky. i hope to facilitate or promote conversations between the citizens of eastern kentucky and kentucky’s state government so their voices can be heard on this matter. by advocating for this connection and this conversation to occur, i hope to make a positive impact on my community. in addition to wanting to make a positive impact on my community, i want to continue to seek what god’s will is for me. this extends not only to my time here at notre dame but beyond graduation, as well. here at notre dame, i have already faced numerous challenges, such as rigorous coursework, but god has seen me through it all as he always has in my life and always will. in challenging times, as long as i consider what god wants me to do and i do my best to do his will, even when it is challenging, i will succeed. as c.s. lewis wrote in “the screwtape letters”, “our (the demons’) cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys.” (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). by obeying god’s will even in the most difficult of times, we can triumph over evil and overcome any obstacles that face us because god will see us through them. this can be applied to when we seek to solve problems facing our communities, as well. we must trust in god when encountering personal and community problems, and we must always face those problems with love. as fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. wrote in the “wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address”, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189463/download?download_frd=1 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ richardson 4 fye week 10). the only way to get someone to see or understand an opposing viewpoint is to approach them and treat them with love always. treating others with love, even those with whom we strongly disagree, is one of god’s commandments. in order to do his will, we need to treat others with love as he does. i have always known the importance of treating others with love and kindness, but my interactions with others in my time thus far at notre dame, especially with those with vastly different backgrounds or beliefs from mine, have strengthened my conviction of this fact. in my moreau class, when we have discussed the challenges facing the united states today, i have learned about others’ viewpoints, which i have been able to add to my own, including those regarding the widespread racial discrimination present in our country today. i have also learned more about others’ viewpoints in discussions of classic texts such as dante’s inferno in my glynn family honors program humanities seminar class. i have greatly enjoyed these discussions and found them greatly insightful and helpful because through them, i have learned more about others’ beliefs and have been able to consider opposing viewpoints that contrast with my own. by approaching these people with love, i have been able to see their points of view, and they have been able to see mine when i have shared mine. by approaching others with love, i am able to have more meaningful and insightful conversations with them and can try to see them and treat them as god would. in the future, i hope to continue to reflect upon my desires in life, upon ways i can better serve my community (including the notre dame community), and upon god’s will for my life. i will continue to approach others with love and understanding in my heart as we have difficult conversations regarding the challenges facing our world today. by doing so, we can have a patient and productive conversation and can begin to resolve today’s problems. the beauty of waiting, uncertainty, and imperfection root belief 1: i believe that i form the best relationships when they require great patience because they allow me to grow in virtue. brene brown encourages parents to hold the mindset of each individual being beautiful and worthy of love despite imperfection (“ the power of vulnerability ” by brene brown moreau fye week 1). during quarantine, i formed and maintained close relationships with friends who immediately attracted me due to their entrepreneurial accomplishments. i learned quite a bit from them, but i also found that while they valued entrepreneurship, they didn’t value it for a cause to improve the world. their shiny accomplishments attracted me, and although i am still friends with them, i’ve found that the friendships i’ve made here at notre dame are so much more meaningful. as brooks said within his ted talk, i should not live life for my resume nor should i assume the lives of others through their resumes (“ should you live for your resume or your eulogy? ” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). drawing on the metaphor of judging a book by it’s cover, shiny accomplishments are just pictures on the front of a book with no real context pertaining to one’s struggles, personalities, or purposes in life. not even those three categories are enough to describe what makes a friend. the process is complex, and friendships form in these years past adolescence with effort, care, and most importantly, time. forming any type of relationship for that matter is ineffably complex, and as fr. pete mccormick says, untying the knots of difficulty takes time as it’s impossible to unravel them all at once; you have to be patient with untying and be thankful for the journey (“ the role of faith in our story ” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week 3). on that subject, i actually struggled a little bit to make friends for the first time in my life despite being extroverted as i was extremely sleep deprived and consequently not in the best mental state. i opened up about my imperfection and anxiousness which resulted in a loss of sleep to quite a bit of students here, and through that vulnerability, i have found love. i’ve found people who care about me despite the effect of a rough start to freshman year. this was in stark contrast to some of my friends back home who could be categorized as “toxic.” according to olivia t. taylor, toxic friends can be unnecessarily negative, and that’s what these friends were (“ 5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship ” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). when i told them that i was considering going into the medical field because i loved hospital volunteering and found the work extremely meaningful, they told me that it was foolish to assume a job in which i wouldn’t be the influencer. when i told them that we’re part of a larger community and that we’re all called to serve in some way, they told me that that viewpoint was quite foolish as well. however, the friends i’ve made here would have listened to me and found reason in my rationale. although sometimes i think, and might be tempted to think in the future, that the students who claim to have the most fun, be the smartest, or have the most accomplishments are the people i should strive to be friends with, i’ve realized that my vulnerability and imperfection leads me to find the friends that will help me grow and vice versa; thus, i strive to continue being vulnerable. when i’m having a difficult time, i’ll internalize it, journal a little, and if the problem persists, i’ll be sure to let someone know. the support systems on campus, the family i have that i can contact with the tap of my fingers, and the friends around me everywhere are there for a reason. on top of that, i plan on going on a church retreat during break and opening my heart about what i’ve learned to my church community. i don’t think that i’ll hold any rules for myself to ensure vulnerability. my father told me to not be so rigid https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ when reaching out to him when i told him i wanted to call once a week at a specific time, and i think it’s wise to take his advice. root belief 2: saying “i don’t know” is not shameful; rather, it’s honest and a potent force to drive change in the world. drawing from the previous paragraph, friendships are complicated. choosing who to be friends with is equally as complicated, and i’m one to say that i don’t know what makes a good guideline for choosing who to be friends with. i know for sure that i don’t have the propensity to like everyone, but i am obligated to love everyone. fr. kevin grove stressed how it’s impossible to love god if we don’t love our brothers and sisters in front of us (“ two notre dames: your holy cross education ” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week 5). there are some students here who have seriously hurt my feelings or my friends’ feelings, and there was even a student who held my hand while (hopefully) saying statements that make me feel insecure, but i’ve had to remind myself that i am no judge. they might’ve not known how they’ve hurt me, and if it’s eating my conscience, maybe it would be wise for me to consult them. the gist is that i might never have definite answers or guidelines in terms of relationships, but i must love what’s in front of me. george ella lyon with her i am from project is a perfect representation of loving every individual through their beautiful poems (“ where i’m from ” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). if everyone were to write a poem, it doesn’t necessarily mean that everyone will write a good quality one. however, that’s subjective to the reader. what’s objective is that there is writing there; thus, there is meaning and value in each poem. everyone has a different back story, and we must all be like george ella lyon, finding beauty and instilling love in the different stories around us. adichie advocates for the value of every perspective when she states that we “regain a kind of paradise” when we value every story (“ danger of a single story ” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). by only paying attention to the stories, or the people, that we like, we exclude meaning. we may not like every story or poem, but each one has a message. there are some individuals on campus who have scared me a little with abnormal friendliness. i’ve never seen amiability as normal, but i’ve had a girl who i’ve talked to only once buy me ice cream, write me a card, and walk to my room. instead of warding her off though, i thanked her. i appreciate her act of kindness, and it must’ve been difficult to put her heart out there. we must have open hearts to unfamiliar stories, to what we don’t know, and through that manner, we can form stronger identities for the good of the world. these adamant yet open identities start with the reader and expand with influence to benefit the greater good, and it all starts with an open heart. to start admitting what i don’t know, i think i’ll experiment with different lifestyles here at notre dame. all throughout high school, i was so accustomed to pushing myself to the absolute limit, severely sleep depriving myself, and overdosing on caffeine. now, i think i’ll start prioritizing my health more. now, i don’t know where this sudden change in lifestyle will lead me, especially in terms of being able to complete my homework, but now that i can think clearer, i can listen better, perform better on tests, and get more out of the notre dame experience. i’ll also admit that i don’t know what types of people i want to be friends with, and that’s okay. i’ll put myself out there, reflect on the love i receive, and see where nature takes me. i have four years ahead of me. that’s a lot of time. i choose to enjoy the journey, the uncertainty, and the people i meet along the way. this semester hasn’t been perfect, and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story neither will the ones ahead, but god’s plan for me is an optimistic one, so i’ll enjoy patience and indecisiveness. week 8 integration one ryan moreau integration paper 15 october 2021 why i am? i believe that leaving room to forgive myself is a trait that, though i struggle with this at times, is necessary for being able to succeed. i have noticed that over time i have become more willing to accept myself for who i am and not treat small mistakes or who i am as a major problem as i have for many years. this is making it possible for me to grow as a person when i am able to shed insecurities and make mental room to accomplish more. “be patient, if you’re in a hurry a knot becomes so much harder to remove” (rev. pete. role of faith in our society, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=university ofnotredamecampusministry moreau fye week 3). this quote spoke to me for the fact that it made problems such as anxiety can be put into terms that are easier for me to physically conceptualize. since seeing this quote, i actually have spent much time thinking about it and trying to incorporate it into my life. i will get to the point where i start to get an anxiety attack over relatively small problems, for example, i was trying to open a bottle and could not, which lead me to nearly crying from the over playing of the stress. “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting” (the red flag campaign. (n.d.) healthy vs. unhealthy relationships. https://drive.google.com/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?resourcekey=0-cnuz pcgzqmkhdyqajvac_a moreau fye week four). i feel like this quote especially applies to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://drive.google.com/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?resourcekey=0-cnuzpcgzqmkhdyqajvac_a https://drive.google.com/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?resourcekey=0-cnuzpcgzqmkhdyqajvac_a my need to forgive myself to be able to succeed. this is true because many instances that have caused me the most pain and heartache have been due to relationships. when i was in high school, i noticed that one of my friends would constantly point out every small fault i would make as a way to make fun of me. this shows the importance of relationships as connected to being able to show sympathy to oneself. i believe that i pursue truth by constantly seeking fairness in the way myself and others around me act. this is one of my core beliefs because i can not separate the way i view the world from the way i interact with it. “race can bias people to see harmless objects as weapons when they are in the hands of black men and to dislike abstract images that are paired with black faces” (payne, k., niemi, l., doris, j. (2018 march 27). how to think about ‘implicit bias’. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/# moreau fye week seven). this is such an important aspect to understanding truth and fairness in the way i do. race is one of the most impactful aspects to a person's understanding of themself. it is impossible to fairly view a person without taking into account all of an individual's many facets of life. when race becomes involved, i understand that i will never be able to understand the full impact of what it means on people of color’s lives. however, i work to learn through listening as well as try to keep people in check who are white when they are unwilling to listen or sympathize with people of color’s experiences. “something someone said to you could open into a scene or a poem which captures that moment; could be what you wanted to say back but never did” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html – moreau fye week six). this quote spoke to the idea of pursuing truth to me in an odd way because it shows to me it is easy to forget https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/# the many parts of life and interactions that have an impact on you. it is difficult to be fair when you are ignoring the many different aspects of a situation when you are trying to reach a certain conclusion that is easy. i believe that my relationships are the best way for me to reach my highest potential. i place great importance on the friendships and family bonds i hold, and i choose to put them above all else. “[vulnerability] is willingness to do something when there is no guarantee” (brown, b. [tedx talks]. (2010, october 06). the power of vulnerability [video]. youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wb m-kd0&index=3 moreau fye week one). i have noticed this come into play during my time at notre dame because, as we all are constantly spending time together here, now we have the opportunity to talk through these matters together. i have realized how important it is to fully open up to the people around me in order to make meaningful friendships. there have been many late nights where i have sat up in my room talking under my christmas lights and talking about our pasts. sharing these types of stories and feelings comes with a bit of risk, this means that by sharing these facts comes with the risk that these relationships may fall through. i actually drifted from someone who i shared very personal information with, and now i have begun to realize that certain things, even if it feels right in the moment, i need to have better self restraint on sharing. “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love” (brooks, b [tedx talks] (2014, april 14). should you live for your resume…or your eulogy? [video]. youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim – moreau fye week two). this is one of the main reasons i put such a heavy emphasis on my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim relationships in life. while growing up, i used to say the quote, ‘teamwork makes the dream work’ on a daily basis. the need to share in work is so important to your ability to get tasks done as well as being able to emotionally process things is easiest when you share the processing of the information with another person as well. “help anyone anyone, anyhow, anyway, simply because you can” (grove, k. (n.d.) two notre dames: your holy cross education [panopto video]. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1 -d0a45c429187 moreau fye week five). this is one of the most important aspects of relationships because it leads into the fact that when you are in them you must be willing to give and serve the people you make relationships with. it is also important to take this into every social interaction. all pieces of humanity are interconnected and in order to maintain your presence, one must treat every interaction as a relationship, since they are in fact in relation to each person. this means to do good, one must be willing to treat every facet of society, including the homeless or others you may not understand, with respect. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 moreau integration two tijerina, 1 robert tijerina megan leis moreau fye 3 december 2021 how i’m getting to know myself better moreau, a place to become vulnerable and speak our minds, has given me my first step in my own discovery. the topics are insightful and introspective and touch on what truly matters in the life of a catholic, student, and human being. but, things this semester haven’t always come so easy. lines have become strewed trying to decide what’s good or bad, worth it or not, and what matters the most. i’ve tried throughout the semester to expose myself to as many different opportunities as possible. so far, here is what i’ve learned. there has been a newfound respect for personal liability. i have no one to blame but myself for mistakes and lack of organization. at the very best, i can hope to sympathize with another student about first-year struggles; they neither have the time or capability to compensate me. there is also always the temptation of skipping class and the reward, come to find out, is short-lived. however, i’ve reconciled this part of me, and figured i pay for every second of class time regardless if i show up or not. i might as well plant myself in the front row and follow through with what college is all about: learning. on top of that, i am noticing my discipline becoming increasingly strained and not what it once was during high school. i supposed it was due to the fact that i hadn’t made it to college, and now that i have, i’ve achieved my dream goal with none other in mind. the experience of this past semester has taught me to deepen my search and plan broadly into the future, paving multiple ideas and accomplishments i wish to achieve. by personal liability, i also mean the actions i take for self-care. how i eat, sleep, and recover tijerina, 2 impact my entire week. in response, i’ve tried to get at least two meals in with a sprinkling of snacks, 7 hours of sleep, and/or take a weekend off if i have to. the benefits have led to a steady schedule that gets me from one day to the next. yet some days, everything has gone against me including but not limited to a faulty alarm clock, popped bike tire, and lost wallet. but, i finished out the day and that’s all that matters. it was a testament to my fr. john jenkins’ week 10 quote, “there is no law of motion in the physical universe that guarantees that you would end up where you are today. more likely, the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement speech” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). this quote resonated with me then and will continue to because, quite frankly, college is not easy. setbacks are guaranteed to happen, but what matters most is how i get up and keep moving forward. i have encountered communities far different from the ones in my hometown. whether through informal or formal meetings, the diversity of personalities, opinions, and perspectives have altered the way i had perceived the world. albeit, the majority of my interactions have been through a party or two, but who is to say that’s not what everyone else does? to paint the picture black and white, there are clear partiers and studiers; extroverts and introverts; friends and not so friendly friends. i always thought i would have to pick between the two (minus the later) and forever abide by my decision. however, i’ve found there is a balancing act between my choices, and there have been weeks where i combined the two or gave up on one entirely. luckily, i have made friends who know what’s best when i don’t. taking screwtape’s logic, “we can drag our patients along by continually tempting, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better”, into consideration, we have to be open to intervention when seemingly at a loss (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). my tijerina, 3 decisions are oftentimes made under temptation or pressure, leading to irreversible effects. i now try to preemptively make my decisions to mitigate collateral damage felt later in the day or week. i can then present my best self in the classroom or with other students and never feel like i’m trying to catch up. this is not to say all weeks are perfect, and as mentioned previously, there have been setbacks. but there have been fewer because of my friends, and slowly, i have started to make choices that have benefited me in the long run. keeping the door open, both metaphorically and literally, has led to opportunities interacting with students, professors, and associates of the school. literally, in my dorm, i always leave my door open. multiple instances have occurred where carroll vermin curiously stroll in, leading to hours of conversation and relationship building. metaphorically, in the hopes of walking through an open door, i have made myself available – we never know when opportunity will strike. this has led to me making friends outside of carroll, familiarizing myself with professors, and knowing of campus opportunities. as a result, i have come to find out college, notre dame specifically, is a once in a lifetime experience and i want to make the most of it. in palmer’s words, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). notre dame and the chance to be in college is a gift i’m slowly unboxing. yet sometimes, it feels like i’m tearing it apart too fast. college isn’t a checklist, but it certainly felt like one this semester. i was constantly in pursuit of something i thought i wanted when in reality, those things contradicted who i fundamentally was as a person. i was doing things to feel accepted, not to be appreciated. now, i’ve learned to take the right things as they pass and not rush into them just because it’s something to do. i had a definite fear of missing out and it had made me regret some of my tijerina, 4 decisions. what is now clear is that college is a journey with endless stepping-stones to an unmarked destination. the decision to pull back is slightly unnerving. who doesn’t want to be in control? but, honoring my rhythms and habits is more important. not everyday can be a step forward. i cautiously trudge through my days taking the time to decide whether things benefit me. this holds especially true with my friendships, and i can now relate to bergmann’s conclusion that she herself “wasn’t interested in forging fake relationships out of necessity” and “wanted genuine friendships that i could treasure” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). there have been unforgettable moments in my college career so far, and i stay excited for the next day, week, and four years. my self-knowledge has continually grown through a variety of learning experiences. the good is to be taken with the bad and i’m starting to know what i want and what i don’t. emotions have gone through a range of phases and no longer reside on opposite ends. decisions are no longer black and white and are now considered within the context of my week. what i sought after, attention, acceptance, and approval, no longer guides me, but serves as clear indicators that i am pushing myself too far. over these past few months, being away from home has led me to evolve past my comfort zone and explore the possibilities of what my life could be if i stick to my rhythms and passions, work hard, and dream big; all things accomplishable through the university of notre dame. integration two integration two ryan dufour what have i encountered and how will i respond? this semester i have answered a couple internal questions. i have encountered new questions that have reshaped my beliefs on a number of topics. one of the most important moments of the semester for me was learning about the “imposter syndrome”. in elizabeth cox’s ted talk she states, “though they had high grades, they didn’t believe they deserved their spot at the university” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox-moreau fye week nine). this quote from the imposter syndrome ted talk connects with me on a deep, personal level. i don’t want to come off as arrogant but i need to be honest. in high school, i had a perfect gpa and scored in the 99th percentile on the sat. however, when i got into notre dame i still felt like it wasn’t from my own doing. this is because my dad and my siblings all went to notre dame. i couldn’t help but feel like i had been accepted to notre dame as a result of being a legacy and that i didn’t belong. even though i was a well-qualified candidate i couldn’t quiet the voices inside my head that told me i was a fraud. i think that since i first watched the ted talk that i have been able to confront my imposter syndrome. i have had success in my classes and i have started to prove to myself that i belong here. i have been able to feel like i deserve to be in class with the other students and that we are equal. i am very proud of this growth and i think that it has been very positive for my life. it hasn’t all been positive, however, as there have been areas that i continue to struggle with. i grew up in a catholic family so i was always dragged to mass and participated in religious activities. coming to notre dame was when i really had to take control of my own faith life. i have tried to go to mass as much as possible since being https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo on campus, but i can’t stop myself from questioning god in times of trouble. in father jenkins’s commencement address, he states “even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive”(“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins c.s.cmoreau fye week ten). this quote from father john jenkins’ c.s.c commencement address was very easy to relate to my own life. i personally believe that i am right where i need to be. god and my faith have led me to this point. however, it wasn’t an easy battle to get here. i had to work incredibly hard in high school, keeping my grades up, participating in extracurriculars, and taking standardized tests. also, i had to keep up with my faith and trust in god that he would get me where i needed to be. that all led me to the university of notre dame and it was always an uphill battle, even though the spirit called me here. i have continually fought in my faith life. in my heart, i know that i am being led towards something great, but at each step, it feels like there is some new challenge. no matter how hard i try i found myself blaming god. i know that this is not the right thing to do but it has made me realize that faith is really built on your relationship with god. i have uncovered this only as i have dived deeper into my faith life. i have found that there will be ups and downs. there will be moments where i act irrationally and question the lord, but as long as i still call out to him and ask for his forgiveness, then we can continue to build our relationship. i realize that faith is a journey and i need to embrace every part of it. faith is complicated and can’t expect everything to go my way. god has a plan. something that has been more complicated for me is diversity in my communities. in a ted talk by professor fuentes, he states, “if we are really serious about trying to make the world a better place then diversity matters for all of https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ us”(“diversity matters!” by profesor augustin fuentes-moreau fye week 11). after watching professor fuentes ted talk, i really started to think about diversity in my communities. i realized that most of my communities are not really diverse at all. this is something that actually bothered me. in the communities that i have control of like my friend groups, i have made great strides to always be inclusive. however, it hit me that in most of my communities, i don’t have the ability to make them more diverse. for example, at notre dame, i am not the one who decides who does or does not get into the school. however, when i walk around campus i just see person after person that looks exactly like me. i have struggled with this lack of power. i want to make a difference. i acknowledge that my communities are not diverse but i can’t do much to change it. this has been eating away at me this semester. another part of life that i have continually struggled with is negativity. it has always been hard for me to be hopeful about something. i tend to turn negative and just assume that things are gonna turn out badly. when discussing hope father king writes, “there is no failure that the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation that he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure”(“hopeholy cross and christian education” by father james b. kingmoreau fye week twelve). sometimes when life gets hard, i start to just think about everything bad in my life and pile it all together. the pain this world gives us can be overwhelming but what i have come to learn is that the lord is there for us. he can make anything in our lives better but we must seek him out and strengthen our relationship. trust in god serves as hope that there are better days ahead. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051?module_item_id=102825 i have learned a lot about myself this semester. there is still areas for me to grow and i accept that. i understand that i am work in progress and i am happy with my growth so far. jacob kinzler integration 2 jacob kinzler what i have realized so far on my notre dame journey one of the most important questions that i have encountered this semester is “what do i believe?” before arriving on campus, i thought that this was a simple question, and i thought that i knew what my answer to this question was. i grew up in a religious household. although my family was not super religious, i did grow up going to a catholic church, and i have been active in my church throughout my life. as a result of this, i only believed what i was told to believe by my church before arriving on campus. i thought that being catholic just meant that i believed in god, jesus, and the importance of communion. i now understand that the catholic faith is much more complicated than this. this semester, i took an introduction to theology class, and in this class, i feel like i have gained a better understanding of the complex christian faith. however, now that i have a clearer idea of what the christian faith is, i feel like my answer to the question of “what do i believe” has become more unclear. the christian faith is very complex, and it encompasses a large number of different things. due to this, i sometimes find it hard to figure out which of these things i believe. my faith was previously very black and white, but now it has become more ambiguous. my faith has expanded to encompass a lot more than just god, jesus, and communion, but this has led to me being uncertain about what i do believe. as i continue to attend notre dame, it is important for me to continue to search for answers to the question of what i believe in. i am hopeful that another theology class and the second semester of the moreau class will help me to make my answer to this question clearer. although i am not entirely sure what i believe, i understand the importance of having faith. faith is very important for navigating life, and i believe that faith is crucial for getting through difficult times. throughout this semester, i have encountered a lot of adversity and brokenness. i have struggled with the transition to college, and this has made it very difficult to perform well with my academics and social life. my faith is what allowed me to get through the adversity and brokenness that i faced when i began college. i do know that i believe in god and jesus, and my faith in them helped me to fight through the difficulties i faced. without praying and having hope that my hardships were for a purpose, i would not still be at notre dame today. i believe that the reason that i struggled as i began college was so that i could grow closer to god. in the screwtape letters from week twelve, it is said that “in [god’s] efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than the peaks” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). in this statement, the “troughs” being referred to are difficult times, and the “peaks” being referred to are good times. in this statement from the screwtape letters, it is said that god relies on difficult times to grow closer to people, and to help them to be with him in heaven someday. the adversity that i have faced has helped me to grow closer to god, and it will help me to be with him in heaven someday. the hope that i will be with god someday is what allows me to get through difficult times; my faith has given me hope that has helped me to make it through my first semester of college. at the start of the semester, i felt as if it was not okay for me to experience adversity and encounter brokenness. as i felt broken, i felt like a failure, and i felt like i would never be able to make it through college. however, i now know that it is okay to feel broken sometimes. in one of https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190607/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190607/download?download_frd=1 the videos for week ten, kirsten helgeson said, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it's a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand, and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). this quote from the video explains that it is okay to feel broken sometimes because it allows growth and it can help someone to become a better person. the struggles that i have faced caused me to “fall apart”, but then i was able to put myself back together, which made me stronger. if i did not ever encounter brokenness, i would never have been able to grow as a person. as i go through my life, i should remember that brokenness is not necessarily a bad thing because it allows growth to occur. l feel like a large part of my struggles as i began college were due to expectations of myself and others. as i first started classes, i was amazed at how great all of the students at notre dame are, and i felt like i didn’t belong. i suffered from the “imposter syndrome” that was discussed during the week nine discussion in moreau. i felt like i was not a good enough student to attend notre dame. i felt like in order to be “worthy” of attending notre dame, i needed to be perfect, and i expected myself to be perfect. i also believed that because i was attending notre dame, others expected me to be perfect, and this caused me to put more pressure on myself. since perfection is impossible, this expectation that i had for myself was very unhealthy. as i have progressed through this semester, i have realized that the expectations that i had to be perfect don’t matter. week nine helped me to make this realization. specifically, in one of the texts, julia hogan says, “individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves). but i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). reading this helped me to understand that i should not expect myself to be perfect, and this expectation doesn’t matter because it is impossible to achieve. i now know that having this expectation for myself is very harmful, so i should not expect myself to be perfect. as i have begun my notre dame journey, community has grown in importance for me. before arriving on campus, i was a member of many communities, but none of the communities had a very large significance to me. however, now i have encountered some incredible communities, and i understand that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). after seeing what a community looks like with both the notre dame community as a whole and the community of my dorm hall, i understand that community is truly a gift. when a community is strong, being a member of the community is very special. after encountering the notre dame community and my dorm hall community, community is now very important to me. i understand that being a part of a community doesn’t just happen without effort. in order to become part of a community, i know that i must be willing to connect with others because “a capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). as i continue with my notre dame journey, it is very important that i am willing to connect with others so that i can become a better member of the communities that i am a part of and strengthen the bonds that i have within my communities. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 10/6 the ideas that shaped me each individual needs to have a set of core, root beliefs that will guide them through their life. they shape who you are, how you interact and treat others, and the way you live your life. without taking the time to really analyze yourself, it can be difficult to understand what is truly important and special to you. however, through our moreau class, most notre dame students are proficient in this realm because of the assignments we have been given the last seven weeks. i believe that i have grown smarter in my own emotional intelligence because i now know what is essential and meaningful to making the next four years here great. i believe that i am confident enough to stay true to myself and avoid falling to the wishes of others. i believe that loving everyone, despite their imperfections, is what makes humanity beautiful. i believe that spending time with myself to reflect on my own actions and behaviors that make me who i am is critical to self-growth. since getting here, i have had many experiences and interactions that have changed who i am and helped to form these root beleifs. i believe that i am confident enough to stay true to myself and avoid falling to the wishes of others. during the first few days of college i truly believed that people thought i was weird and that they wanted nothing to do with me. my self-confidence was struggling and i was panicking that i would make no friends or that i would have to become a different person and fake it. however, i quickly discovered that that was far from the truth and that people love me exactly the way i am. i used to be fearful about meeting new people because i was so anxious that they wouldn’t like me or would ignore me. now, i am excited to meet new people that are similar to me and if they aren’t, i couldn’t care less! as carla harris said in her 2021 commencement speech, “fear has no place in your success equation.”( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 , 2021 laetare medalist address, by carla harrismoreau fye week 5). i now know not to hide who i am, or try and force myself to do things that i don’t want to do. there have been nights where i am just exhausted and want to lay in bed so, instead of going out with my friends, i stuck true to myself and laid in bed. i also think that sticking true to myself has been imperative to making real, true friends that i can identify with since they accept me for who i am. one of my best friends here has already taught me so much about myself and she continues to make me a better version of myself always. in the article “five signs you’re in a toxic friendship”, the author writes that, “ great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences. a healthy, balanced, mutual friendship involves peers who ask questions and bounce ideas back and forth.” ( https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ , five signs you’re in a toxic freindship, by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). this made me look further into my relationships that i have mader here, and either strengthened my beliefs that i had found good people, or did the opposite. i believe that loving everyone, despite their imperfections, is what makes humanity beautiful. everyone here has their own story and it is a privilege to get to know people where they feel comfortable enough to share it with me. however, it is impossible to ever understand every single person’s story, so we must give them the benefit of the doubt. as chimamanda ngozi adichie said in her ted talk, “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of their dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ similar”( https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story , the danger of a single story, by ngozi adichiemoreau fye week 7). i had a conversation one night with a student who was from china and she explained to me how some professors here assume that just because she can’t speak perfect english, she is less of a student. however, she is probably smarter than many of the students here because she knows four languages and english wasn’t even her first one. we must not judge people in any circumstances because we have no idea about their life experiences. i have also learned that if you want to be an ally to all of your classmates, you must be willing to be there for everyone even when it's not convenient to you. one of my friends was very homesick one night and really needed someone to talk to, yet i had an exam the next day that i wanted to study for. i chose to be there for her because i love her and didn’t want her to turn to other outlets to cope with her feelings because, “ you cannot selectively numb emotion.( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzait h2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 , the power of vulnerability, by brene brown moreau fye week 1) college is a very vulnerable time for many students and bad habits can be developed if support systems are not in place. so, i hope that i can be there for all of my loved ones because they all have their own story and struggles. i believe that spending time with myself to reflect on my own actions and behaviors that make me who i am is critical to self-growth. to become a better person, i need to constantly be cognizant of my behaviors and develop ways to improve them and confront my own failures. in david brooks’ ted talk he states, “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of a https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 character is constructed.”( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim , should you live your life for your resume… or eulogy? by ted brooksmoreau fye week 2).i haven’t been doing this enough because i have been so busy but i plan to take at least five minutes every sunday to sit down and reflect on the things i did over the week. part of this includes reflecting on the things that make me who i am, like where i am from. as i explained in my poem about where i’m from (moreau fyeweek 7), my dad's cooking is extremely important and was a core part of my identity. this last week i have been asking him to make certain meals for me when i’m home for fall break. i am super excited to go home to experience not only his cooking, but nostalgic restaurants and eateries in my town. finally, the last main component of who i am is my spirituality. going to a catholic institution can sometimes be intimidating since i don’t consider myself a very religious person. however, just because i am not religious, does not mean i am not spiritual. i have been trying to work on being more in touch with myself because, “ spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe”( https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_ source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau , faith brings light to a dark world, by david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). i have been trying to keep a positive mentality about our housing situation and the idea that “everything happens for a reason” has really helped me. i think that if we remain positive, we can make the best out of the situation. after my first two months here, i have learned many special lessons that have formed me into a new person. i have learned to become more confident in myself because of friends that i have made that accept me for who i am. i have taken the time to understand people’s stories and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau taken that into consideration when interacting with them. finally, i have understood the importance of analyzing my own behaviors in order to become a better person. 1) i know myself well “ fear has no place in your success equation” 5 “ great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences. a healthy, balanced, mutual friendship involves peers who ask questions and bounce ideas back and forth.” 4 2) being there for others that you cannot selectively numb emotion 1 the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of their dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar. 7 3) spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe 3 “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of a character is constructed.” 2 fye qqc 1 question: do you think that people shying away from vulnerability is significantly affected by a competitive culture where one’s so-called “weaknesses” may very well be exploited in forms of bullying? quote: “when you ask them about belonging, they'll tell you about their most excruciating experiences of being excluded.” this commentary by a psychiatrist on the tendencies of her patients puts into perspective the all too common need for an emotional outlet. with traits like “toughness” and a cool, unwavering composure being valued in the past decades as a supposed sign of strength, showing emotion is often taken as a sign of weakness. the fact that people are even seeing psychiatrists could be taken as a step in the right direction as thy are opening up. this upward trend, if it exists, could persist as the number of mental health clubs, organizations, and awareness groups increase (at least i have noticed an increase) and strive to change the public perspective on vulnerability. commentary: the ted talk reminded me of a life lesson my mother has been trying to instill in me in the past few years as i have been coming into my own person. as part of research for her master’s thesis on adhd, she learned that individuals with adhd have rejection sensitivity and take many forms of rejection much worse than neurotypical individuals and are more likely to interpret behaviors not intended as a rejection as a rejection. hopefully, dr. brown’s advice stressing the importance of vulnerability will spur me to be more confident taking risks i previously have been too shy to, such as going out of my way to be sociable and make a solid group of reliable friends to get off on the right foot in the beginning of these next four years. week 8: integration one mcclintock 1 finn mcclintock mr. retartha moreau fye 15 october 2021 digging into my beliefs in the past eight weeks at notre dame and in the moreau first year experience, i have developed a better understanding of my beliefs as an individual. personally, just being here at notre dame is revealing to me regarding my beliefs. fittingly, we began the moreau curriculum talking about vulnerability, and my understanding of vulnerability in joining the gateway program. i believe that vulnerability, while a rare feat for me, is a necessary leap. while i fail to put myself in positions of vulnerability in regularity, i understand it to be the same thing that brené brown described: being able to do something without any promise of success or failure (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). for most of my life, i have desperately avoided anything that offered an uncontrollable or dangerous result. in the past year, i have pushed myself into more vulnerability. i played on my school’s baseball team for the first time since elementary school. at notre dame, i have built upon that vulnerability by joining the baseball analytics team. more importantly, i decided to join the gateway program over other respected schools where i was guaranteed a spot in the business school. while i have no guaranteed result at notre dame or in mendoza, i am more willing to see out that result. here at notre dame and hopefully as a mendoza graduate, i believe that my experience will be more than an education in books and numbers. speaking about the difference between earning résumé success and eulogy success in his ted talk, david brook mentioned that one https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 mcclintock 2 has to surrender to something or someone else to gain strength (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brook moreau fye week two). this reminded me of brené brown’s focus on progress as an individual by putting yourself in uncomfortable positions. while résumé success can be found individually and with only strength or perseverance, eulogy success depends on caring for others and being dedicated to a result not fully in your control. in the notre dame community, this eulogy success can be found in many ways. helping classmates, reaching off campus to aid the greater community, and using my notre dame education to better the world are more valuable than the accomplishments of a resumé. outside of the classroom and service, i believe that notre dame excels at another aspect of the individual: faith. while faith is not a religious experience for me, faith in others pushed me to be more willing to meet and accept new people in my first weeks in south bend. i come from a relatively wealthy area, and i have heard it described as a bubble before. while i failed to see that before, i have come to recognize now how different my background is from many of my fellow domers. in my life, i have been able to have faith in my parents to provide for me and allow me to pursue activities that i desire to discover myself. however, in my time in south bend, i have heard stories of people turning down schools because of cost or making sacrifices to help out their families financially. listening to my peers has spurred me to see why and in whom i possess faith. one of the student reflections i read in the third week echoed my sentiment, saying “faith called me more and more to meet everyone around me for who they were” (“student reflections on faith” by victor moreau fye week three). i believe that notre dame should be a safe, beneficial community for relationships of all kinds. to foster this community, it is obviously important to learn how to treat people in your own relationships, though recognizing signs of toxicity or violence in others’ can be just as https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view mcclintock 3 important. this can be easy in some cases—noticing physical or verbal abuse in your presence—but in many toxic relationships, the abuser can mask their actions while creating an unhealthy relationship (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). an abuser can control and intimidate their partner from spending time with their friends, effectively preventing outsiders from noticing any issues with the relationship and helping their friend escape it. while i hope and believe that i have not had any friends in an unhealthy relationship here at notre dame, this ability of abusers threatens the community we have here if we fail to stand up for our fellow domers. i believe that the purpose of our time at notre dame is to gain the tools necessary to aid those around us when we enter the real world. i was lucky enough to hear carla harris speak in person at my brother’s graduation this past summer. harris highlighted the value and principles of a catholic education, and one idea that stuck with me was her motivation to help anyone at any time she could (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). as carla harris’ mother made sacrifices to ensure that she received a catholic education growing up, i must make sacrifices to aid others in becoming the best individuals they can be. to move my life from just success to significance, i must give all of my skills, influence, and power to others. i have found myself drawn to do this more in my brief time at notre dame than in the previous decade of my life. when greeted with questions and requests for help in classes, i have been genuinely willing to help my peers as much as possible. as i continue my notre dame experience, i am sure that this trait will proliferate. on my journey in notre dame and the real world, i believe that my family and background motivate everything i do. however, i am now on my own, blazing my own path with choices, successes, and failures that shape my future (“week 6 qqc: identifying influences” by https://drive.google.com/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?resourcekey=0-cnuzpcgzqmkhdyqajvac_a https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 mcclintock 4 finn mcclintock moreau fye week six). i carry much more responsibility here at notre dame without family in person to guide me. still, i have years of experience with my family that i believe will set me on the right path even from thousands of miles away. i believe that helping those around us is necessary, regardless of background or cultural differences. as chimamanda adichie notes with her college roommate’s assumption that all africans are one single story of suffering, biases, stereotypes, and generalizations are normal (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). reflecting on my own feelings, i absolutely make generalizations of people and groups. that perspective is normal, but i cannot let my biases or stereotypes affect how i actually treat those individuals. seeking out multiple perspectives and stories allows me to discover new aspects of cultures that i never would have recognized. as i have mentioned, i have already experienced a lot of new backgrounds in my time at notre dame, and i am sure that i will see many more. in this brief time at notre dame, i have learned a lot about myself. i had not realized all of my beliefs or perspectives on the world. through the first eight weeks of moreau, i have met a variety of perspectives and stories that inform my own. this has been a valuable experience that will continue in the remainder of my time in moreau and at notre dame. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration two anna vanavermaete professor theo helm moreau fys 10101 3 december 2021 face-to-face with reality the university of notre dame is a place where kids come to become adults who change the world. the experiences students receive along their journey transform them into a brand new person; the best for the world and themselves. college is a journey of self discovery. one of the first things i experienced at notre dame was imposter syndrome. it wasn’t hard to see that i was the lesser of the group of students at notre dame. the most place where this was most evident was in the classroom. theology seemed to come so easy for other students. when they would get cold called, they had no trouble answering the question while i sat there trying to come up with the answer, even though i had done the reading. and on theology tests i would get bs while the majority of the class got as. furthermore, everything came so easy for my best friend, like chemistry, while i had to try five times as hard just to get a grade somewhat close to hers. these things led me to thinking i didn’t belong at notre dame. in a reading from week nine, where we learned about encountering dissonance, julia hogan says, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite that we aren’t good enough,” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). this quote relates to the imposter syndrome that i feel because i had goals i wanted to achieve, like getting good grades, but wasn’t, and therefore, i just felt like a failure. this makes me realize that while expectations can be good for you at times, they can also be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau damaging. i think it’s in my best interest to set small goals for myself that are attainable so that i don’t feel like a failure for not attaining big goals, and most importantly, stop comparing myself to others. another thing i’ve encountered at notre dame is the loss of innocence. a little back story to this story: something disturbing happened a few days prior and was really affecting my mental health. as i was sitting in ceramics class, my professor asked me if everything was okay because i wasn’t talking a lot, and it just seemed like something was off. everything just kind of hit me then: how my childhood is gone, how i’m growing up, and i had to leave class. in week ten, we learned about encountering brokenness. during this week, we watched a video about putting your feelings into a pot and then smashing it. the video said, “all of the loss you’re feeling, the people you’ve had to let go of, the love you never really got to live out fully. i want you to put those into the pot,” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i thought this quote was fitting for my situation because i had my realization in ceramics, and it’s about loss that you feel. it’s important to have a healthy way to express emotions because if you bottle them up, they all come crashing down on you at once, like a hurricane. i think that in order to grow, i need to learn how to express my emotions properly because i just bottle them up, and it affects my schoolwork. the third of the things i’ve encountered at notre dame is my own community. when i first arrived at notre dame, i was not excited to be in my dorm. i heard from almost every one that i talked to that howard isn’t a fun dorm. i kept this thought in my mind for so long that i made it a reality and distanced myself from howard. during week eleven, we learned about encountering community, and in a reading from that week, parker palmer said, “community is that place where the person you least want to live with always lives,” (“thirteen ways of https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). when i first saw this quote, i just thought it was something like community is everywhere, and that’s why someone you don’t want will always be there. after thinking about this quote more, i see this quote as you may not always realize that a place is where you want to be at first. for example, howard isn’t just a place i live in anymore, but i actually see it as a community now. i realized that the people there are actually fun if you get to know them and are always there for you. i think this all taught me that i need to be willing to give things a try before i make any assumptions because you never know what it’ll actually be like. the last of the things i’ve encountered at notre dame is light. college is hard. i figured this out when, no matter how hard i tried, i still somehow ended up with a b in chemistry. i tried studying for an entire week, tutoring, and office hours. this really took a toll on me mentally, because it just made me feel stupid. during week twelve, we learned about encountering hope. during this week, we read “the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis, in which he said, “he will set them off with communications of his presence which, though faint, seem great to them,” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this relates to me because during this time everything felt so hopeless and dark, but something told me he was there helping me through this, and that everything would be okay in the end. i found that jesus was the light in the darkness, guiding me through my turmoil. this taught me to always have trust and hope in jesus because getting through life without him is tough without him guiding you through the darkness. while being at notre dame i’ve encountered a lot: whether it be through clubs, classes, or dorm life. some things minor, some things major, but they’ve all had some sort of an affect on http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187501/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187501/download?download_frd=1 me. the way that i handle the things i encounter and the messages i take away from them, truly define how they shape me. integration 2 assignment bryan reaume integration 2 3 december 2021 what have i encountered and how will i respond one of the most important questions that i have asked of myself this semester has been “what do i want”? with where i am going with my major, and what career i intend to join, i have few answers to. julia hogan, of grotto, wrote that “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life”(why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i have often encountered dissonance in pursuing goals that have not been purely my own while trying to discover what i want. one specific experience i can point to was during my soccer career. i was on a team that i had played for for over 12 years, but i began to find that i was not happy on this team, as few of my teammates took it seriously as many began to fall out of love for the sport. i identified a new team that i could join that better suited my needs as a developing player, and began to train with them. after some consideration, i made the difficult decision to leave the team that i had played for all my life in pursuit of the new team. these players that i was leaving were more like family– i had traveled all over the country with the same boys ever since i was 6 years old, so leaving felt like treason. my old coach was very receptive of the news when i met with him, but asked that i not tell anyone on the team because he feared that many would also leave the team when i did. this did not feel fair to me. the mailto:breaume@nd.edu https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau expectations of my coach did not align with what i felt i owed my best friends. this was very hard for me as i waited for the coach to tell the team, but he never did. after days went by, i finally felt that i needed to stop “living someone else’s life”, and do what i felt was best. i told the team, and shortly after left, but i honored those that i had played with for my whole life, as i felt i should. in week 10 of moreau, we watched a video on the kintsugi workshop, where women create wonderful works of art by breaking pottery and then piecing it back together with golden glue(women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto moreau fye week ten). i feel that i can strongly relate to this metaphor for life by analyzing the time i have felt the most broken in my life. soccer had been my thing for all of my life, and i had put so much time and effort into this sport with hopes of playing at the highest level in college. however, when covid hit, all college recruiting stopped, and i lost hope in playing in college. as the end of my senior year came closer, i realized that i did not feel the same happiness for the amount of effort put into soccer as i had in times past. with this, i decided to hang up my boots, as they say, and left competitive soccer. however, this effort of brokenness has only recently hit me. it used to be so black and white, but not i find it complicated as to who i am. soccer used to be my whole life, what i dedicated all free time to, but now, i don’t have anything like it. my identity used to be black and white, but now i don’t know how i would answer the question “so tell me about yourself”. however, i think just as the ladies performing kintsugi workshop, there is some beauty in my brokenness. i have begun to realize that it is important to be able to look inside myself to determine who i truly am, and not have to describe myself with only sports or other trivial pursuits. with this, i feel that i have made something beautiful from my brokenness. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau everyone raves about the community that is the university of notre dame, but what is it about this place that makes it such a special community? while this question was once filled with much ambiguity, it has gained more clarity the longer that i have spent time here and pondered this question in light of what was said by palmer in regards to community. “authority is granted to people who are perceived as authentic, as authoring their own words and actions rather than proceeding according to some organizational script”(thirteen ways of looking at community by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven).it may be a little cliché, but i truly believe that being rooted in a faith allows notre dame to build a better community. this is because it allows people to act authentically in their faith. i attended a catholic high school in san diego, but the majority of students there were not catholic. paying attention and participating in the school masses were considered “not cool” and talking about your faith could invite some serious talk about you behind your back. i had seen it happen. this meant that no one could act as their authentic self– very catholic students were suppressed by social pressure and un-catholic students were further convinced that being faithful was in some way weird. despite that being high school, where the standards for fitting in were astronomical, it was still a stark contrast to what i have encountered here, where people are regularly open about their faith and authentic in their actions and beliefs. as i’ve progressed in my journey at notre dame, i have realized that the hope that i carry has grown in importance tenfold. life feels more serious in college– no longer am i just attending school for grades to get into college, i am not attending school because i want to learn in order to apply knowledge to a future career. i am also on the cusp of entering the real world, and life suddenly feels serious. because of this, the highs and lows that i encounter feel amplified– the good times feel great and the bad times feel terrible. this is why holding hope has http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ so much more importance for me now more than ever. just as fr. king says, “in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope”(hope holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve).in the great times, i need to continue to remain hopeful for the future just as much as i must be in the terrible times. but this is not easy. it feels like when things are going badly, it is easier to beg god for change, but when things are going well, i can forget that all good things come from god. even vice versa, when things are going badly, i can blame god and lose hope, and only have hope when things are well. in all events, it is hard to keep hope in these extreme highs and lows and this is something that i desire to continue working on throughout my time at notre dame. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ finding purpose the college application process was a rude awakening to the fact that i struggle with self-reflection and often self-identification. i was forced to write in a space where i had to boast myself to boards of admission, but i often did not know what to boast. i lacked certain insight as to my internal structures and beliefs, as i think that i am still developing those, and it is actually beneficial that they have not been cemented yet. i don’t necessarily have a roadmap planned out for my future like the game of life, but the college application process did help me discover what i’m looking for: a passion. i’ve always been a passionate person, whether it be a school project, a team sport, or a faith organization, i tend to entrench myself in whatever i am doing. in all honesty, i believe that i am at my most healthy when i am passionate about something. it is with this notion that i believe that at notre dame, i am searching for my next passion. the growth that i’ve experienced in these first seven weeks have been monumental in aiding my search. i believe that my self-esteem is now something that i can control. almost every teenager has struggles and bouts with their confidence and self esteem; i was no different. i had bad tendencies of comparing myself to others, setting unattainable standards for myself, and ultimately feeling like i was not good enough. however, getting into a school like notre dame really changed my trajectory. that may initially sound shallow, but i wasn’t desperate for validation more than i was fulfilled to see my hard work pay off. i was glad that i showed the courage to put myself out to a school that i loved, and they welcomed me with open arms. brené brown defines the word courage as “from the latin word cor, meaning heart and the original definition means to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). notre dame is a place which values such courage, and i believe that my self-esteem has really hits its stride since they embraced my courage. i also believe that notre dame’s emphasis on growing the heart and mind will significantly help me develop internally. throughout the college process, i was asked more often than not to write about all of my strengths and to promote the goodness within myself. however, this can be overwhelming to one’s self-esteem. “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses. you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which your others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin. out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” ("should you live for your resumé... or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). david brooks makes a key distinction that really knowing oneself and maintaining equilibrium within ones self-esteem requires honest self-assesment. i believe that i’ve always been very honest with myself; i’ve sometimes acted a little too much like adam ii. i’ve noticed very quickly that notre dame is very different from other schools, most notably by its unforgiving catholic culture. friends from my hometown at other universities across the country find it hard to believe that my dorm hall has a chapel, or that we have welcome mass in our football stadium. however, i believe that notre dame’s backing of faith is a true sign of strength. coming from a non-catholic high school, i was originally afraid of a possible culture shock at notre dame. instead, i’ve found that the university uses faith to promote its students. dora from the class of 2022 states “faith matters to me because it gives me a foundation upon which i live. by this i mean it provides me a foundation of purpose, morality and what i believe to be truth” (student reflections on faith moreau fye week three). i believe that a greater focus on faith will help me grow and find my best self, especially considering how much it has helped others at the university. i believe that in order to be my best self at notre dame, i must surround myself with people who also push me to grow instead of try to pull me down. “a friend who uses you may treat you like a therapist but never ask about how you’re doing. or it could be the friend who just wants access to your social circle, scouting your friends as potential romantic interests or even finding a way into your professional connections” (“five signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i believe that i’ve already found great friends at notre dame, and i’m extremely blessed for such a reality. one example is that my friends have collectively come back from the dining hall, each with an apple for me, knowing that i was studying very hard for the night. i believe that i’ve found a group of friends who collectively work for each other, and it’s such a great thing to have. i often struggle with anxiety in regards to my success, especially at notre dame. “it is simply this: notre dame du lac has been given to us by the bishop only on condition that we build here a college.· as there is no other within five hundred miles, this undertaking cannot fail of success, provided it receive assistance from our good friends in france” fr. sorin letter to basil moreau by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). i share fr. sorin’s stress that i cannot fail at notre dame, but i lack his genuine confidence. i believe that i will continue to gain confidence in my abilities as my time at notre dame continues, but for the time being i’m very glad to have a strong support group ready for me at any notice. i believe that home is indeed where the heart is, and i’ve never felt that sentiment more than at notre dame. this is not to say that i don’t like where i am--i love notre dame--however, you don’t realize the small things that you took for granted back home once you leave for school. for me, i miss the long chats with my mom while doing the dishes after dinner, or the banter i would have with my soccer team while we took our gear off after practice. i believe the “where i’m from” poem speaks volumes about the little things we take for granted. “besides being a poem in its own right, “where i'm from” can be a map for a lot of other writing journeys” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i believe that it’s important to recognize the little things when you can, because it can further develop one’s faith and respect for their peers. just as it is our job to appreciate the little things, we must confront the large, systemic problems in our world that need to be addressed. “there are perceptual illusions, for example, in which white subjects perceive black faces as angrier than white faces with the same expression. race can bias people to see harmless objects as weapons when they are in the hands of black men and to dislike abstract images that are paired with black faces” (“how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). implicit bias is just one example of a reality in our world that some people are not willing to accept. i believe this could certainly be tied to a lack of an adam ii in our society or a weakness of courage, or the heart. i believe that as individuals, it is our duty to work for the good of humanity instead of ignore it, and i believe that notre dame is instrumental in promoting such a pursuit. despite the cliché, i believe that the experiences i’ve encountered in my first quarter of school at notre dame has fostered a lot of growth within me. i believe that i’ve strengthened my courage, self-assesment, faith, relationships, respect, and willingness to do good. a year prior, i often found myself unsure of my surroundings, unconvinced by my faith, and unappreciuative of all that was good in my life. thanks to these first seven weeks, i believe that i now have important traits in my toolkit to help me in my search of a passion or purpose. moving forward with courage and hope the excitement of my new identity of a college student and encountering everything in a new setting in a different country gradually diminishes as time goes on and as things become more and more routine, which also means that i have more time to sit down and reflect upon my past semester. in high school, i used to be a student with excellent academic performance without having to put extremely serious efforts into studying. i know that students here at notre dame are at least as smart as me, so it is no longer that easy to keep an academic record as good as the one i had in high school. academic-wise, i set expectations that are appropriate for my ability and the new context, rather than pressure myself that i have to be a straight a student here as well. “expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine)1 living up to high expectations can be extremely hard. however, expectations are flexible, and i can change the expectations i set for myself when i feel like the previous ones are unrealistic or do not fit the current condition. when i do not meet the expectations i set, i will not panic but reevaluate the expectations and my performances. if i find that the expectations are unrealistically high for me to achieve, then i will lower my expectations; if it is because i am putting my efforts in a wrong direction, i will then 1 grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-ofexpectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau make adjustments to my plan and my actions. expectations do not equate pressure: when i set proper expectations, they will make my goals clear and at the same time do not get myself overwhelmed. academics is definitely not the only part of college life, though; interaction with the nd people has been a great experience so far. i especially appreciate the sense of community notre dame possesses, and how warm the people here are. for example, at thanksgiving, a sociology professor prepared a feastful thanksgiving dinner at baumer hall and invited a few, mainly international, students staying on campus during the break. this is my first time celebrating an american thanksgiving, and having an american thanksgiving dinner including grilled turkey and pumpkin pie in the cozy common space at baumer and chatting with students and the professor was so rewarding. i felt so moved by how warm and caring the nd community can be. “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness.’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven) 2 i also feel the connectedness through the unified color of green during game days, the christmas decoration at my residence hall, the generous advice i receive from my peer mentor at clubs, etc. among the nd people, there is such connectedness, and it is the connectedness that makes the community so closely bonded, special, and meaningful. 2 couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ sometimes, however, i miss my life in high school. but as i think about it, it is not exactly my high school that i miss; i realize that what i miss is a life with few things to worry about, a life well protected and cared by my family, and the convenience and familiarity of living in the city in which i grew up and am so used to. at that time, schoolwork is all i have to worry about; now, as a college student studying abroad, i have more to worry about, as i start to think about my future paths from the perspective of an independent adult. when i come here on my own to college, i have to manage all my business on my own and try to adapt to an entirely new environment. however, as i give up something, i also gain new things such as friendship with new people, acquiring new knowledge, and new perspectives i learn from conversing with people with diverse backgrounds here at notre dame. “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place.” (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king – moreau fye week twelve)3 one of the great things about college is the chance to meet people and have experiences that are not the same, and this is what makes life exciting and worthy of expectation. i learn to cherish every encounter for the uniqueness, the different perspective and ideas it makes possible. meeting new people gives me chances to establish friendship, exchange perspectives, and creates new memories. 3 canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192471?module_item_id=109281 my journey here at nd is challenging, but at the meantime highly fulfilling and rewarding. a simple, carefree life exists only in kindergarten; now i am a college student and a young adult, and even though the life is much less carefree, the conversion of heart and mind i acquire from interaction with the people in every unique relationship is an indispensable part of forming a complete, capable, and well-rounded person. as i grow up, my experiences, no matter good or bad, enable me to grow more mature and be closer to my way of discovering my true self and realizing my goals. i appreciate not only the good ones for the pleasant memories, but also the bad ones that taught me important lessons of life and pushed me to grow. “the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” – moreau fye week ten)4 i am grateful to all experiences that shape me to be the person standing here today, and i look forward to my future journey on which i embark with courage and hope. 4 grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ 3 integration lmachion ryan retartha moreau fye: integration 3 4 march 2022 a life that’s memory does not die was a loving daughter and student. she was a determined and dedicated individual who strived for greatness but never overlooked the small joys of everyday life. at the end of the day, her family was at the core of everything she did. although leigh accomplished many things throughout her life, she treasured personal experiences with others the most. she was present in the moment and did not let trends and phases take her away from her family and friends. she put a lot of time into her career, but she always left time for family game nights and making homemade dinners for her family. she was inspired by this quote: “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length, so that i can more easily remember who i am.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau qqc week 1). she never let her work or the technology that surrounded her consume her. leigh always made good use of her talents, skills, and notre dame education to help others. as a graduate of notre dame, she had a community of alumni who she aspired to be like, particularly kierstan dehaven, who says, “faith and community, pillars of notre dame, have carried me through [my life],” (“domer dozen”moreau qqc week 2). despite achieving great things in her career, she always knew that it was not the accolades and accomplishments that constituted a life well-lived. she was fully aware that she could make differences in people’s lives by the little things. leigh looked to her confirmation saint, st. therese of lisieux, for inspiration regarding that. leigh was inspired by the “little way” of st. therese, and she tried to implement the spirit of the little way into her 1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://domerdozen.nd.edu daily life. although she helped many disadvantaged people by utilizing her business skills, she never forgot the importance of anonymously helping a neighbor or dropping a note to a friend going through rough times. leigh always strived to understand her purpose. she believed that uncovering one’s purpose was a lifelong journey. leigh once read an article that she referred back to when making a life decision. the article asked three important questions: “is this a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and gifts, engages all of your abilities, and uses them in the fullest way possible? is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau qqc week 3). she also understood that life on earth is not forever. she valued each moment with her family and friends and viewed each day as a gift from god. she treasured her catholic faith throughout her life. while in her freshman year, leigh knew that she wanted to pursue a career in business, but she was unsure of which specific area to major in. she spent time reflecting, researching, and speaking with people with experience in the field. she incorporated the phrase “reflect and take action” into her thought process (“navigating your career journey”moreau qqc week 4). leigh also utilized this way of thinking aside from deciding her major. she always made sure to use a similar decision making process whenever she encountered any challenging decision. throughout her life, leigh valued the opinions of others. she was very independent, but she recognized the fact that others could sometimes diagnose her strengths and weaknesses better than she could. her parents described her as “someone who is highly dedicated to a task,” (conversation activitymoreau qqc week 5). leigh took these words with her throughout her life but was also not hesitant to address her weaknesses so that she could work to become a better person. 2 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit one thing that leigh always tried to keep in mind every day was gratitude. even when things were not going her way, she always tried to find something positive that happened during the day to think about. she refused to allow the negative thoughts floating around the world to dictate her happiness. she was inspired by this quote: “difficulties were still present, but awareness of my gratitude was shifting my view, letting me see that everything was not dark and cold—in fact, many sights and sounds were quite lovely,” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurichmoreau qqc week 6). many would agree that leigh’s positive outlook on life was a defining characteristic of her as a person. leigh also valued the interactions she had with others, even those she was not close with. leigh attended a small, all-girls high school, and her graduating class had twenty-one girls. from this experience, leigh learned the value of truly listening to each and every person, regardless of his or her background, opinions, or interests. she carried this experience throughout her life with her whenever she met new people. leigh firmly believed that every interaction a person has occurs for a reason, and that a random conversation between two strangers benefits both parties in some way. she agreed with pope francis’ quote on this topic, which stated, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number.the other has a face. the "you" is always a real presence, a person to take care of,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau qqc week 7). this belief helped leigh to adopt a global view. she loved traveling so that she could learn more about people all over the world and become a more understanding and aware individual. throughout her life, leigh exemplified characteristics that proved that she was always thinking of others. leigh always loved to laugh and have a good time. however, she knew the value of hard work and dedication, and she put her mind to the task at hand. leigh lived a very 3 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript full and well-lived life, and her memory will live on through her funny stories and memories with her family. 4 encountering reflections the single most important question that i have asked this semester is do i belong here? when i was first accepted into the university of notre dame, i was ecstatic. notre dame was one of my top choices for a college education. i had fallen in love with the size and beauty of the campus, the great educational opportunities, and the welcoming atmosphere. yet in the weeks and months that followed my enrollment, i began to have doubts about my acceptance. here i was at one of the most prestigious universities in the world. what had i done to deserve such an honor? i felt that i could not live up to the expectations of others. however, through my moreau class, i was able to quantify these feelings of doubt and shame. by listening to the ted-ed video about imposter syndrome, i learned “that the most surefire way to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it”. (cox imposter syndrome). by hearing from both my moreau instructor and my peers openly talk about their experiences with imposter syndrome, i was relieved. i was not the only one that doubted myself and my work. ever since then, i have become more confident and prouder of my status as a student at the university of notre dame. i no longer ask myself the question: do i belong here? rather, i tell myself a statement: i do belong here. as a result of my notre dame journey, my belief in hard work and dedication has grown in importance. since i was an adolescent, i had always been a hard worker. i still remember the first time i pulled an all-nighter in 8th grade for a science project. that day, i had worked on the project from the moment i came home at 4:30 p.m. to 5:50 a.m. the next morning, only 10 minutes before my parents would have to drive me to school. i still remember the disapproval on my mom’s face, as she realized i had not quite gone to bed. yet despite all my hard work and dedication, i could never find a justification for my efforts. all my motivation was external. i worked hard solely for my parents’ approval or for a good grade at school. i never put time and effort into my education outside of schoolwork, as i was never certain that my hard work would pay off. what if all my education and dedication were wasted? why should i continue working hard if i do not know if i will be rewarded for my efforts? these questions gnawed at the back of my mind. i could not answer them. there was always a chance, no matter how slight, that all my hard work would eventually all be for naught. however, since the time that i have been at notre dame, this mentality has shifted. it started with the moreau tour from the log chapel, where fr. stephen elaborated on the history of the tiny log chapel. he inspired me with the story of the french priests out in the snow, who had nothing but the clothes around their bodies and a mission to create notre dame. he told tales of rev. edward sorin and his unwavering dedication to the university despite the odds. even the destruction of the main building of notre dame only served to inspire sorin to continue his mission to create the university. while i was inspired by these stories about perseverance, i was not convinced by them. they were just stories of luck, i told myself. however, after i read holy cross and christian education, i realized that these stories of dedication and bravery were not about luck. these stories were about the never-ending power of faith, where “there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse…it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift.” (holy cross and christian education 15). by believing in their hard work and dedication, rev. edward sorin and the priests were able to make their dreams come true, no matter the odds. they were able to take the hardest challenges and obstacles to create the foundation for their success. after i encountered these stories and passages about hard work, i realized that as long as i had faith in hard work, i will be able to accomplish anything just like them. one thing that was previously clear that is now more ambiguous is racism and discrimination. when i was in elementary school, i had falsely believed that racism was nonexistent, and that racism had been quelled in the 1960s. i had learned in my history textbook about the civil rights movement; how civil rights leaders used peaceful protests and civil disobedience to engender equality and justice for all people in the united states. by high school, i had become disillusioned to that idea, but i still believed that racism happened overtly. i believed that racism was as easy to spot as a sore thumb, and that racism was a rare occurrence. however, after i read the article “should catholic schools teach critical race theory”, i realized that i could not have been further from the truth. i discovered from my reading by christopher j. devron the true scope of racism: we see systemic racism in higher rates of incarceration, longer sentences and capital penalties for equal crimes for blacks as compared to their white counterparts. the impact of historic redlining and unjust real estate practices throughout urban neighborhoods has led to lower levels of generational wealth for blacks as opposed to whites. covid-19 mortality rates reveal disproportionate victims among black people and unequal access to health care. (devron should catholic schools teach critical race theory?) devron showed me that racism is embedded deep in the structure of our society and that racism is much less clear than what i had believed. even if people were not overtly racist and derogatory, the systems and benefits of the united states still are racist today. as seen by devron, many of the prisons, real estate, and healthcare practices in the country still unequally disadvantage african americans. through reading the article, my perception of racism as just an isolated event was completely shattered. i am now just beginning to understand the full extent of racism and discrimination in this country. one thing that has become clearer is the idea of a community. before i came to notre dame, i never had a clear picture of a community. i knew that a community was a group of people with something in common, but i had little idea as to how communities are formed. my best guess was that communities sprouted like a tree, requiring time and dedication before they are created. however, i realized through moreau that communities are always present like the air around us. “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” (palmer thirteen ways of looking at community). instead of trying to plant a seed and grow my own community, i discovered that communities were already under the surface. i only need to accept the fact that the community is already there. citations 1. “what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week 9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo 2. “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron – moreau fye week 10 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-highschools-black-lives-matter-240792 3. “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ 4. “holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry – moreau fye week 12 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 maria finan moreau first experience 11 october 2021 the journey of self-reflection i believe that i am searching for courage and self-identity. as a first year student, adjusting to college life has been a challenge. there are so many obstacles that i have had to deal with such as living on my own, studying for exams, and having to find new friends once again. thankfully, the moreau first experience has allowed me to explore my own development as a person. during week one, i enjoyed listening to dr. brown’s ted talk and gaining some insight into how to approach vulnerability. she discusses how the study showed that people “had the courage to be imperfect” which helped her recognize that even if people knew they had flaws, they still knew they were worthy of love (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). her ideas about building up courage really resonated with me as it pertains to a big chunk of my development. growing up, i had to push myself to talk to new people and not be afraid to share my interests. but eventually, that forced push became routine where i was able to open up to others with ease. having this courage has been vital to my adjustment at notre dame. i believe that i encounter self-development by understanding the various strengths and weaknesses i have. with this information, i can utilize and further my strengths while improving myself in regards to my weaknesses. according to david brooks, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the internal success and the internal value” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two). brooks demonstrates that there is so much pressure to become the ideal version of yourself when that is just not possible. it is important to understand that you will always have an inner battle within yourself. for me, i have faced a lot of self-development during my time at notre dame. understanding the mental and emotional struggles of college courses and finding opportunities all on my own has opened up my perspective on adulthood. facing new challenges was the best way for me to expose myself to both failure and success. i believe that i can use my values and beliefs to help guide myself towards a fulfilling life. according to fr. peter mccormick, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). he emphasizes the importance of discovering oneself, especially during a critical period such as entering college. the journey towards self-discovery includes the three most important values: faith, love, and hope. through our faith, we can use god’s advice as a guide for improving our lives. having love for ourselves and others is also vital for character growth and forging important relationships. lastly, hope is what drives and motives us to find new opportunities. before i came to notre dame, i followed along the easy and comfortable path my parents had provided for me, and i truly appreciated their hard work. but becoming an adult is a complicated process filled with mixed emotions and difficult times; however, interacting with the student body here helped me understand that everyone is in the same position. by accepting kindness and love from others, i have matured as a person. i believe that i create life-giving relationships by respecting and caring for my family and friends. moving to various places, i have learned the important aspects of making friends and keeping those relationships strong. at the same time, i have experienced toxic relationships where i was able to reflect on the situation and grow from it. many people cover up their bad actions with the words “because i love you” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four). one of the hardest things to do in a relationship is noticing unhealthy actions, especially when the person is someone you deeply care about or have known for a long time. fortunately, there are many ways to spot these kinds of actions such as finding that they only tend to talk negatively about you and others or if they continuously lie to get what they want. it is important to recognize what type of relationship you have with someone by searching for their main traits. traits such as honesty, generosity, and being respectful show me that my relationship with this person is safe and healthy. i believe that education helps me develop new perspectives and gives me the opportunity to make a positive change on the world. according to father moreau, an education is a “work of the resurrection” for all students (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). education is a gateway for people to develop their moral, physical, and spiritual journey. through our education at notre dame, we learn new things and experiment with them by applying them to our lives. the impact of covid-19 helped me understand the importance of getting an education and gaining global perspectives in order to make a positive impact on the world. during desperate times, it is so important to be compassionate towards others and be willing to lend a hand. i want to use my time at notre dame to help others through various experiences and opportunities that i participate in throughout the next four years. i believe that i grow through the influences in my past. george ella lyon discusses how she creates a poem about her life with the concept that “the question of where you are from reaches deep” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). she demonstrates the influences from her past that had a significant impact on her life. using this idea, i created my own poem where i discuss the fond memories i have had with my family and friends. for me, the most important influences have been from the life lessons i have gained from my parents, and the fun things i have done with my friends. while all of them have not been positive, they have impacted my development as a person. i believe that my community should make an effort to understand other people’s cultures and customs. every day, more and more people are getting access to information via the internet, social media, and the news. but, we still do not always get all the information, which causes bias and stereotypes to occur. this is why it is important to strive to gain new information. according to chimamanda ngozi adichie, she highlights that reading books from different cultures “saved [her] from having a single story of what books are” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). as adichie mentions, when people have a set view on something and are told the opposite, they are often surprised by how different the world really is. thus, it is important to not let stereotypes dictate your actions towards others as it can be harmful and disrespectful. throughout the last several weeks, i have grown a lot and learned to take things slowly. adulthood is not an easy process and mistakes are bound to happen. but it is important to be level-headed and appreciate the lessons you have learned in order to apply them later in the future. the moreau first year experience has given me the opportunity to self-reflect and figure out where i want to further myself in regards to my career, interests, and social life. untitled document how college thus far has shaped my beliefs i came into this course at the beginning of the semester with an existing set of beliefs that i gained through my life experiences thus far. now, several weeks later, i have gained a deeper understanding of where my beliefs come from and with my new experiences i have gained new knowledge to add to my beliefs. my beliefs about the people around me mostly remain the same, but my beliefs about myself have changed. i believe that i grow by challenging myself, whether it is in school, socially, or in other areas of my life. i believe that i am made to learn, whether it is about academic subjects, new skills, about my community around me, or about people in my life. i believe that i am responsible for my own actions and how i respond to situations around me, even if i cannot control them. i believe that character is more important than accomplishments. i believe that i pursue truth by questioning things continually and re-assessing my thoughts and beliefs with each new experience i go through. given that i have gone through so many new experiences recently, this comes with a lot of thinking. in week six, i looked into what has impacted me as a person before coming to college and how where i am from has shaped me. i think that many of my beliefs come from the people that i was surrounded with in my life in michigan. my family, friends, and community all shaped my values and understanding of the world, as i wrote about in my “where i’m from” poem (“the victorian port ‘city’” by me moreau fye week six). i think that growing up in a small town in rural northern michigan has given me a different experience than many people i’m now surrounded with at college, so it gives me a unique perspective. i am grateful for where i’m from, but it is also nice to see people from different backgrounds and see their perspectives and beliefs. this brings me to the topic of week week seven—identifying perspectives. week seven dealt with how to identify your own perspectives and implicit biases. from this i learned that it is easier to combat bias and have a more worldly perspective when you surround yourself with people who may be different from you. from the ted talk “danger of a single story” i gathered that i should surround myself with people that have different stories than my own and not just stick with people that have had all the same experiences as me (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this is something that i have done since coming to college and it has confirmed my belief that i grow by challenging myself and expanding my horizon and my belief that i pursue truth by reevaluating my values after undergoing new experiences. i came to college searching for a sense of belonging in this community, which has not been entirely easy to find. being a gateway, it seems that there is no one school i belong at, i do not fully belong at holy cross or at notre dame. yet, i have found a sense of belonging among my fellow gateways. in week one of moreau, i recognized that i needed to be vulnerable and put effort into my relationships in order to find a sense of belonging, and i have surprised myself by how well i have done that (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i never had to go through much effort to make friends before, as i had grown up with the same 120 odd people in my grade since elementary school and knew them so well. however, i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/assignments/30891?module_item_id=106174 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/assignments/30891?module_item_id=106174 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106195 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be forced myself to be vulnerable as i believe that i grow through challenging myself. my experience with being vulnerable in friendships has confirmed my belief that i grow through challenges, as i have become better at making friends and also grown strong friendships. this relates well to what i learned in week four of moreau, on the topic of searching for life-giving relationships. following the listed warnings in “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship”, i was able to identify which people i wanted to be vulnerable with and pursue a deeper friendship. i did not want to put effort into relationships where the other person was not putting a fairly equal amount of effort back, were negative all the time, or people who did not really listen to me (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i have invested into relationships with people who value me as a person and value some of the same things that i value. it was nice to find people that valued god the way i do. coming from a public school, not all of my friends had a very active faith, and of the ones that did, none of them were catholic. from the week three video “the role of faith in our story”, i recognized that faith has a big influence in my story, the story of notre dame, and the story of a lot of students around me (“the role of faith in our story”, fr. pete mccormick c.s.c. moreau fye week three). a lot of my beliefs and values are impacted by my faith, and it is nice to be surrounded by a community that has a strong faith, and in turn, shares some of my values. although i found it is good to surround myself with people with different experiences than me, it is nice to have people and a campus around me that shares my faith and values. i have found that the beliefs and values this campus was founded on are a lot of the ones i share. week five, on identifying narratives, was very interesting to me because i knew a fair amount about notre dame, but not having any family that has ever attended, i did not know the full narrative of its founding. father sorin’s letter was very interesting to me because i was able to learn what beliefs he had and how the university was founded upon the belief that students should be prepared to enter into the world should grow their faith and character while at school (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau'' moreau fye week five). this is something i also believe is important in a university, and something that i wanted for myself, which is ultimately one of the main reasons i ended up at notre dame and not another school. i believed that notre dame complimented my beliefs and would help to challenge me in the ways i wanted in order to grow into the best version of myself. since coming to notre dame, i have realized that i am made to learn, and i have learned a lot of new things in classes, new things about the world, new skills such as playing ultimate frisbee for the first time, and even new things about myself. finally, this brings me to week two of moreau—on searching for self knowledge. this was probably my favorite course material so far, and i really enjoyed this week. i specifically liked the ted talk, which talked about what kind of traits you want to be remembered for, and what the important things are in life (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). it made me realize that i want to be remembered for my character and not my accomplishments, which has become a belief i now hold firmly and base many of my actions on. this belief has served me well so far at college, because even https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106103 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106053 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106009 though i still want to achieve many things, it helps me not to stress out too much when i don’t do as well as i wanted to on a math quiz, or that instead of worrying about getting a catch in my ultimate frisbee game i should focus on being positive and cheering on the rest of my team. this belief is one that is very different from before i came to college. i was worried about getting good grades and achieving as many things as possible to get to where i wanted to go. but now that i successfully made it to south bend, i stopped and realized that all of those things i accomplished were not as important as the qualities i had gained on my journey, or the person that i have become. with my new experiences in college, i have been able to challenge and reevaluate my beliefs in order to figure out what truly matters to me in life. my journey of lifemoreau integration one what makes me, ‘me’? i believe that my experiences, relationships, perspectives, faith and my internal values have molded me to become the person i am todaymy authentic self. “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. stories can break the dignity of people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity.”(“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week sevenhttps://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story ) coming from mumbai, india, from a young age, i have had a variety of experiences that have shaped and molded me to be the person i am today. from seeing caddies who i knew at the golf course begging on the street to experiencing being a caddy at the golf course to helping provide food for them, i believe that each and every one of my experiences have made me who i am, my authentic self. i believe that our stories and experiences make us who we are. i believe that our stories can help comfort others, making them understand that they are not alone in a situation, but can also dispossess and malign an individual when shown with a single narrative. the stories and experiences that we have can provide different perspectives and narratives, which can help us understand our authentic self and bring us closer to people, be it similar or different stories. i believe that my stories and experiences have shaped my journey in discovering ‘me’. my family has greatly shaped my morals, values and my identity. i have learnt the importance of being empathetic and caring and the significance of adapting and embracing different cultures from experiences with my family such as going on a trip abroad or being explained in the past to a young child to not hit my brother when he troubles me. i believe that along my journey of stories and experiences, the obstacles i have faced have allowed me to learn from my mistakes, molding me to be the person i am today. be it getting poor grades, getting yelled at by a teacher for talking in class or mourning the loss of a loved one, i believe i have transformed and grown to become my authentic self. i believe that the relationships i have had over the past 18 years of my life have molded me to become the person i am today. be it relationships with family or friends, i have learnt to understand different perspectives, narratives and communicate effectively which has enabled me to become more authentic. further, i believe that these different perspectives from my relationships have enabled me to be more open minded and understand and accept different cultures. i believe that in order to form great relationships, vulnerability is required so that people understand different https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story perspectives of yours. as per brené brown,“this is the world we live in. we live in a vulnerable world and one of the ways we deal with it is, we numb vulnerability.” (“ the power of vulnerability” by brené brownmoreau fye week onehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2 s1wbm-kd0&index=3 ) often we try to numb our emotions and vulnerability because we don’t want to be seen as weak and therefore hide our authenticity. however, this can start taking a toll on an individual leading them to break down as they find themselves looking for purpose in their life. i believe and agree completely with brown’s message that we must embrace vulnerability because i believe embracing vulnerability means being fine with being imperfect, allowing you to be content with yourself, authentic and to find enjoyment in a hectic moment. embracing vulnerability can help us experience different perspectives. i believe that in order to forge life giving relationships one must demonstrate vulnerability, but only to a certain extent and be willing to listen to others and embrace the different perspectives that they present. i believe that these different perspectives that we learn from can mold us to become our authentic selves. life giving relationships are formed when there is mutual respect and comfort amongst each other. honesty, loyalty and independence are also important to form life giving relationships. dependence on others in relationships can often lead to toxic relationships which can be unhealthy for a person physically and menally. as the one love foundation’s quote of “no one will ever love you as much as i do” (“because i love you, double whiskey by one love foundationmoreau fye week fourhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g ) tries to convey, we must never equate our self worth to a relationship and often these relationships can help us understand what we are worth and can show us who we are and our true authentic selves. i believe that our faith can mold us to be the person we aspire to be, the person god created us to be. with faith at the centre, i believe that god can guide us greatly in being our authentic self and has helped me become the person i am today. as fr. pete said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey success, productivity and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be, the person god has created you to be.”(“the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormickmoreau fye week three-https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois ) i truly believe that faith can help us be our authentic self as god created us to be a certain way and live up to certain moral and ethical standards and when we have our faith and god, who believes in us and is by our side, we can overcome any challenge in our path. often in our lives, we may have obstacles and can find ourselves in dark places, unmotivated and sad. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois however, when we have faith by our side, it can serve as a beacon of light in the darkness. i believe that all of us must give faith a deep and long consideration before we discard it from our lives. as in the end, what harms us in giving faith a try? when i was younger, i would often struggle with faith and struggle with the concept of believing something that i could not see. now,” i’m a student who wants to get closer to faith at his university” (i(me) by moreau fye week six) as i have understood that faith need not necessarily mean seeing god but could mean fulfilling your function god created you to do and having a purpose in your life. lastly, i believe that each individual has their own internal valuesvalues that the environment they grew in and their parents imparted to them. however, we often find ourselves conflicting between what society wants us to do and our moral internal values.“and soloveitchik had argued that these two sides of nature are at war with each other. we live in perpetual self-confrontation between external success and internal value.”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooksmoreau fye week twohttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim ) in india, often the external idea of success which is imposed, is excelling in academics. this often leads individuals to lose sight of their authentic self in search of validity from society. science and engineering in india is often pressured by the elerly as it was deemed to be for smart children whereas the arts and humanities would be deemed as “not smart” or considered to be a waste of time. therefore, very often, children in search of validation from either their parents or society would enter the sciences or engineering even when they did not like it and were not passionate about it. this would often lead children influenced by external ideas of success to lose their true passions and their authentic self, be it through academics or extracurriculars. people often think more about expectations and the external idea of success of society more than the internal values because we often believe that if we do not conform to societal expectations, we will let those close to us down. and our authenticity is challenged greatly when society has an external idea of success and we decide not to conform to it, but follow what we believe is right irrespective of what society thinks. as carla harris says, ““there is only one you. your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage. no one can be you the way you can be you. your power lies not in who you are but in whose you are. trust the power in you”.(“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harrismoreau fye week fivehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 ) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 root belief: i believe that humans should accept their fragility why do you believe this? : i think humans should accept and expose their fragility because it is the first step towards creating meaningful relationships. all humans are fragile to an extent; we all have flaws, vices, and things we could be embarrassed about. by exposing your fragility, you show yourself as someone whom people can relate to. paradoxically, when someone reveals their fragility, that person becomes more robust. how have you come to believe this? : i reached this conclusion because shame originates when someone perceives that they are not as socialized as their peers, that they are not part of the in-group, and are thus subject to potential violence (be it physical or psychological). this fear of being potentially assaulted causes an anxiety that can only be overcome by fragility because it allows people to relate to one another and thus build trust. how has this belief been challenged? : this belief has been challenged by the fact that not everyone is willing to reveal their fragility out of fear. how does this belief influence your actions? : because of this belief, i try to be as open as possible about my thoughts and feelings. i do it so that others around me can be more accepting of their own internal characteristics. i believe that through this, i'm helping create a moral, genuine society where there is no reason to lie or mask one's true self. quote from moreau material: "shame is easily understood as the fear of disconnection. is there something about me that if other people know it or see it, that i won't be worthy of connection?" ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one) root belief: one who searches for self-knowledge cannot be distracted by the opinions of others. why do you believe this? : i believe in this because a search for self-knowledge is an activity done by oneself, with oneself, for oneself. if society wishes to impose a framework on you, you need not accept their demand. the opinion of others – therefore – is not essential. the people around you won't accompany you wherever you go, but you will always have your conscience as your companion. how have you come to believe this? : this belief came as a reaction to heidegger's idea of eigentlichkeit (a neologism roughly translated as authenticity). eigentlichkeit is the quality of "owning oneself." heidegger says that, as modern men and women, our idea of self is constantly at issue because we are always trying to fit into specific roles, like actors in a play. an authentic man doesn't wear "masks" so as to interact with others. he does so authentically, not expressing judgment upon others nor being affected by others' judgments. in this sense, a person with eigentlichkeit is one who "owns" himself. in the search for one's origin and purpose in life, authenticity is crucial. how has this belief been challenged? : eigentlichkeit could be wrongly understood as a desire to be unique, to stand out from others. this, however, does not correspond to the real meaning of the word because it is too artificial. eigentlichkeit is by its very nature something that is done naturally, without stress. it is not something that one should strive or fight for, but something received as a gift from years of self-reflection. how does this belief influence your actions? : this belief has influenced me to do what is right independently of what others think. it has allowed me to take a path i believe is right instead of being led astray by social anxiety and peer pressure. quote from moreau material: "we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii." ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two) root belief: having a spiritual life imbues the world with beauty. why do you believe this? : i hold this opinion because spirituality adds another layer to our perception of the world, therefore making it more profound. through religion, we become attuned to a more subtle and exuberant world. how have you come to believe this? : i came to this conclusion through my own experience with god. the word religion is derived from latin religare: re (again) + ligare (bind or connect). i believe that spirituality allows us to reconnect with the divine. indeed, christ calls us to imitate him and, in so doing, understand that everything in the universe was created with a purpose. as transcribed in genesis 1:31, "god saw everything that he had made, and indeed it was good." as christians, we are invited to marvel in the exuberance of god's work, much like he did upon its completion. how has this belief been challenged? : this belief is constantly challenged by the existence of evil. illnesses, natural disasters, and the perversion of humankind (myself included) often make me doubt the beauty of god's creation. however, these moments of disbelief are countered by the idea that evil came to the world not as a product of god's will but as a product of men's misuse of his free will. thus, like a disobedient child, we should seek reconciliation with our father through the figure of christ in order to heal the edenic schism. how does this belief influence your actions? : tvs shows often portray christian spiritual life as one where all pleasure is continuously restrained, an unending mortification of the flesh. my belief that beauty is a gift from god allows me to surpass this cartoonish view of christianity and to instead appreciate the riches of my surroundings. a burning blue sky, a blossoming tree, a blissful family; these and many other things create in my heart an undeniable urge me to thank god for the life i have. quote from moreau material: "the christian spiritual tradition is clear on this topic: at the core of oneself is the very presence of god. jesus says in the gospel of saint john, 'a thief comes only to steal, slaughter, and destroy; i came so that they might have life and have it more abundantly." (the role of faith in our story by fr. pete mccormick, moreau fye week three ) root belief: to love someone takes mutual commitment. why do you believe this? : because love requires a sacrifice from both parties. lovers need to sacrifice time, money, and energy for one another. as such, it requires a lot of commitment. how have you come to believe this? : i came to believe this because love is something that implies sharing: sharing food, sharing gifts, sharing moments. sharing involves opening yourself up to someone else; it involves giving something away. because of this, if someone is taking and not giving anything in return, a relationship can become unhealthy, parasitic. how has this belief been challenged? : it is challenging to differentiate toxic from healthy relationships because there might be an asymmetry of perceptions. for example, a man may love a woman and thus project his own feelings on her, but she might not necessarily reciprocate. when eventually the man finds out that she is not interested, he may feel inferior or even betrayed. this would lead him to believe that the relationship was a toxic one, but it was never a relationship, to begin with. how does this belief influence your actions? : this belief influenced me to always be respectful towards women i am romantically interested in. however, people often misunderstand what i mean by respect. respect is about knowing and adhering to your partner's limits; it is not about being overly formal or sycophantic. relationships need to be fun, but they also need to have boundaries. quote from moreau material: "a friend who uses you may treat you like a therapist but never ask about how you're doing. or it could be the friend who just wants access to your social circle, scouting your friends as potential romantic interests or even finding a way into your professional connections." ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto, moreau fye week four) root belief: god has entrusted a journey to every human being. why do you believe this? : i believe that every creation is created with a purpose in mind. we, as creations of god, are no different. god has a plan for every human being, you do not need to adhere to this plan, but he has it in store for you. you can use your free will however you please, but god's plan for you is the one in which you will be most fulfilled. how have you come to believe this? : according to aristotle, everything that exists has four causes: material (of what it is made of), efficient (the preceding force that pushes it into existence), formal (what is the essence of that thing, what makes it what it is and not anything else), and final (the ultimate purpose, the reason why it was created). but what exactly constitutes the purpose of our lives? i found the answer in jeremiah 1:5 when god spoke to the prophet the following words: "before i formed you in the womb, i knew you; before you were born, i sanctified you." every individual human has a calling in life; otherwise, they wouldn't be born in the first place. how has this belief been challenged? : this opinion is challenged by the possibility that the christian god does not exist. going forward, i wish to study theology in a more rigorous manner and scrutinize all the different arguments for and against my beliefs. how does this belief influence your actions? : this belief has influenced me to ponder my decisions carefully, to see whether or not they are noble and oriented towards a higher purpose. quote from moreau material: "graduates, i tell you that as you move forward from this day, i believe that your ability to manifest your destiny, to find and fulfill your purpose lies in your ability to adjust your focus, to sharpen your vision on the good and great things that are right in front of you and that are in store for you." ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris, moreau fye week five) root belief: we can amend an epistemic crisis. why do you believe this? : i believe this because the epistemic crisis is essentially a problem of narrative, which is a very common historical phenomenon. how have you come to believe this? : i came to this conclusion while reading david brook's article on post-2020 election america. political polarization and different ideas of science have created an atmosphere where two neighbors could be living under entirely different narratives of reality. this, however, was not so uncommon throughout history: pagans and christians, heliocentrists and geocentrists, communists and capitalists. different groups of people have always held starkly conflicting views of philosophy, science, politics, etc. an epistemic crisis is nothing more than a feeling of living in a different reality from people who hold different opinions. it is fundamentally a problem of political and scientific polarizations. in his book, phenomenology of the spirit, the german philosopher georg wilhelm hegel explores how new ideas are created through dialectics: a dominant statement (thesis) is challenged by its polar opposite (anti-thesis), and through debate and critique, a new, more refined opinion is generated (synthesis). perhaps what we are living through now is merely one of the many instances of dialectical conflicts. in any way, i believe that, as time goes on, we will learn to live with our differences. how has this belief been challenged? : this belief has been challenged by the possibility that the political tension we are living through in the current year could remain unsolved or translate into a physical conflict. how does this belief influence your actions? : because of this, i feel like it is necessary to create an environment where different opinions can be respected and logically discussed. i do as much as i can to ensure that i don't disrespect others based on their views. quote from moreau material: "today, many of us feel that america is suffering an epistemic crisis. we don't see the same reality. people say that they often assume the problem is intellectual. our system of producing propositional knowledge is breaking down." ("how to destroy truth" by david brooks, ny times, moreau fye week seven) integration 1 integration one: the secret recipe to a “heightened sense of self” i believe that i am searching for belonging and consistently positive spaces. "in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen." (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) in high school, i excessively promoted inclusivity and a sense of belonging in all the spheres i was a part of. for instance, as section leader, i made it my mission to maintain a creative atmosphere for me and my musical peers. by coupling my farcical yet sternly productive leadership style with my ongoing desire to make the band an all-inclusive space, i could see this extracurricular blending into a family. additionally, diversity and inclusion hold a special place in my heart as a black woman. because of that, i strive to become a beacon of warmth for myself, my peers, and maybe the entire student body. that being said, it started to feel like my past work was all for naught in coming to notre dame. for someone who valued inclusion and belonging for such a long time, why is it taking me so long to find my own? drawing from the quote, i can assert that i initially wasn’t allowing myself to be seen. i can’t even describe the awkwardness that comes with culture shock and immediately assimilating into a space with no ease into it. that same apprehension is what i believe clouded my perception of my self and how i wanted others to perceive me. with the content provided from week one, i hope to make great strides toward myself up and gradually become more comfortable with being seen. in the weeks proceeding week 1, i’ve made it a point to insert myself into positive spaces, where i’m appreciated exactly how i am. i believe that i can grow as my authentic self by presenting my authentic self. reflecting on the contents of week two came with an overall reflection of my self. tasked with completing the (via character strengths surveymoreau fye week 2,) i wasn’t expecting much, for i thought i knew myself; i considered myself authentic to a degree. after getting my results, i was surprised to see that my lowest rankned “traits” were love and humanity, but more importantly, “valuing close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing & caring are reciprocated; being close to people.” my initial ideas of authenticity came crashing down, and the results only prompted me to take a deeper look at myself. were my past friendships all for naught? was i never being my authentic self the entire time? the series of questions further prompted me to tailor my wants and needs when it came to friendships. sure, as a first-year, its easy to go towards the route of making friendships with anyone and everyone. there’s definitely nothing wrong with that, but i feel that it causes us to lose sight of meaningful relationships, and being accepted into a space as you are as your authentic self. i don’t want to feel like i have to— deviate a part of my being to be accepted into a space, and aim to reach that high point with the help of the survey. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup i believe that strengthening my faith can positively impact my life, especially at notre dame. a framework; a support structure or system that holds parts together. a common theme here involves self-reflection after finding out i’m not as “structrually developed” as i woud’ve thought. in a video form fr. pete mccormick, he offers fresh insight regarding the overall importance of establishing a framework, and how it can keep you grounded, and even survive in life. (the role of faith in our story fr. mccormickmoreau fye week 3) additionally, text from prof. faherberg specifically provides me with methods on how to strengthen my framework, or in his words, “fix my spiritual lighting” (faith brings light to a dark world -faherberg, moreau fye week 3.) with the previous knowledge of love and humanity being a weak point for me, i will and have already started to use this week’s content to understand the importance of the gift of faith and love, hoping that i can build upon that weakness and establish a stronger framework as a whole. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by valuing mutualism. as previously mentioned, it’s so easy for us as first-years (and at any age) to jump into any and every friend group (at least in the beginning) and not actually valuing the quality of the friendship. it has happened to the best of us. however, situations like these have only lead me to further value the importance of mutialism in friendships. mutualism, a term that is broadly linked with science, refers to a relationship in biology or sociology that is mutually beneficial to two living things, or in layman’s terms, where both are happy. i believe that friendships shouldnt be parasitic, and that great friendships should allow all parties to learn from eachother and grow together. the red flag campaign’s infographic provides aspects of both healthy and unhealthy friendships, aspects that i will internalize and use them to seek out relationships that will not only empower me but allow me to empower others. (the red flag campaignmoreau fye week 4) i believe that stories shape my journey by providing a string of growth, and comparing what was to what’s to come. “use who you are, what you know, and who you know to help others; for that will take your life from success to significance.”( 2021 laetare medalist address, carla harrismoreau fye week 5) storytelling and creating narratives are crucial to growth; you always want to have something to look back on, but at the same time, use a story to look forward. coming to college for the first time, nobody knows your narrative; nobody knows what it took to get here, or the struggles on the way. your new narrative starts with your first step on campus grounds. using your narrative to bring significance to your life, as harris eloquently explains, is something that i had never considered was such a powerful tool. the content from this week, as impactful as it was, prompted a shift within me and how i go about personal growth. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 i believe that i am formed from past experiences-good or bad. “...remember, you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start.…”( where i'm from" (george ella lyon) moreau fye week 6) this week was different in the way that rather than being provided content, it was me providing the content. lyon response to a poem, which turned into the widely popular “where i’m from” concept, was an exercise in which (positively) forces you to magnify on and look into yourself, and essentially how you got to be who you are today. in a way, it sort of links with the previous week by way of putting our narratives on a pedestal of significance. additionally, writing the poem brought a degree of sentimentality. it reminded me of my authentic self, my past experiences, etc and certain nuances in my own personality that are usually overlooked (by myself) in my daily life. i believe that the poem will aid in my growth by serving as motivation; reminding me of where i’ve come from, and use it to take me forward. i believe that i pursue truth by maintaining openmindedness. “it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice. it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure. unfortunately, we can’t conclude that: many of us are more biased than we realize” ("how to think about 'implicit bias'" keith payne, et.almoreau fye week 7) implicit bias is not a concept i’m unfamiliar with. in fact, implicit bias, a set of subconscious patterns that we all have in our brains, (whether we like them or not) affects all of us. the content from this week reintroduced the true definition to me, but also provided several perspectives on how certain groups respond to it. from my own experience, implicit bias is uncomfortable, and the fact that it’s ingrained in even the best of us makes it even more difficult to understand and dismantle. for many instances of implicit bias, especially in racial instances, it than likely involved someone that is close minded. i believe that this week's content will prompt me to dig down to the source of implicit bias, and further use my voice and my experience with implicit bias to open up the minds of my peers. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109407 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ integration 1: moreau anthony polotto oct 14, 2021 finding “my people” under the dome “it's the people”. when asking current notre dame students the sole reason for why they “love thee”, the answer always centralizes around the people. as a prospective student last year, i was overly invested in the college application process, divulging myself into every aspect of the schools i applied to, to discover the “best fit”. when i opened my acceptance letter, i experienced a wave of emotions and such a euphoric feeling which shook me emotionally. at the moment, i really did not know anything about notre dame besides it being associated with my dad screaming at the tv on sundays when the irish played. but from that day on, i learned every single thing there is to know about this school, attending every virtual information session on monday, watching every “day in the life of a notre dame student” youtube video, and even scrolling through some #notredame tiktoks i managed to find. and through this content browsing and intense research what did i learn? notre dame seemed to have it all: a perfect harmony of school spirit, spiritual life, challenging academics, opportunity for networking, but what stood out to me the most was the community. after receiving acceptances from several other schools, notre dame consistently stood out for its effort to welcome me to my future “home under the dome”. when attending the virtual riley spring visit weekend, i heard countless testimonies from students who shared how their experiences at notre dame have been so positive and life changing because of the people. so, when my family and i finally made the decision for me to come to notre dame, i was overly eager to see how my expectations about the people, and community would prevail when i arrived. at the start of college i was searching for my people: and as cliche as it sounds, the people who would help me get through the next four years, the people who looked so happy in the brochures and videos, and the people who would challenge me to be the best version of myself. during welcome week, all i could think about was meeting these people, and it started to become very overwhelming. as students spoke at the introduction to moreau speech, my head was so consumed with the fear of acceptance and questions about what people would initially think of me. as i sat in the auditorium, i overheard conversations of people talking about their major, their classes, all that they had done over the summer, and what they were already doing to get ahead. this was even more stressful for me because my only wish was to belong in this new environment. a few days into classes, i began to talk more with my roommate and the people on the fourth floor of my dorm. the adjustment was coming more naturally, and then i watched the ted talk by brene brown. in her talk, brown discussed the power of connection, and how, “the ability to feel connected is neurobiologically how we are wired. it’s why we are here.” ("the power of vulnerability"-by brené brown moreau fye week one) this scientific concept accounted for my own desire to create meaningful, long lasting relationships with others who i can relate to and feel comfortable with. oftentimes in a new environment with new people, i look for ways to connect with my peers through relating. brown’s words really clicked with me as i realized that vulnerability is the only way to truly give yourself the chance to cultivate connections with others. i believe that an integral part of vulnerability also comes with accepting failure, and acknowledging my weaknesses in order to grow. in high school i had a “perfectionist” mindset, and although i do feel like that is part of how i am here, when looking back at the root for my growth, it lies within my struggle and setback. in week two of the course i listened to david https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 brooks explain the contrast between the two different sides of human nature. “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths, adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). brooks highlights such a critical question which i feel that i should reflect on more often: what are my intentions in doing this, and ultimately what is my purpose? by asking myself these questions as i begin to get involved in different activities and events on campus, i hope to compartmentalize my time efficiently. in week 3, i was reminded of the person who i am striving to be. i believe that my purpose and my vocation is to use the strengths and identity god has given me in a way to help and inspire others. “the person who lives in the dawning of faith, hope, and love is someone whom c. s. lewis calls one of the “new people.” (“faith brings light to a dark world-by professor david fagerbergmoreau fye week three )he says you can spot them. “but you must know what to look for.” this quote from professor david fagerberg presents me with an enlightening outlook on the woman i eventually will become at notre dame. the testimonies from students that i watched senior year, gave me a glimpse into this community of less than 9,000 students. but it wasn’t until i arrived on campus, that i realized how amazing the people really are. whether it is the random stranger who smiles at me as i walk to class, or the friend who pushes me to persevere through that chemistry homework late at night , i have seen the effect of faith even more now than ever before. although it is pretty uncommon to have a negative encounter with someone here on campus, i believe that it is important to know how to try to turn any difficult situation or circumstance into a positive one. week four’s lesson on building healthy relationships built upon trust, love, respect and equity equipped me with strategies to create long lasting relationships https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 with all of the friends i had met so far. olivia t. taylor writes, “some people tend to focus on the negative more than the positive. it’s a learned habit, so try challenging your friend by pointedly asking them about something positive that’s going on in their life.”(5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). my montra has always been “you got this”. as a flyer on the cheerleading team in high school, my optimism and positive mindset has been something which has kept me from falling, both literally and figuratively. during my time at notre dame, i hope to maintain this spirit, and be that friend who will uplift people when they need it. i also hope to take this same spirit of optimism and joy to give back to the community here in south bend. service and caring for other people is something that brings me great joy in doing. during week five i reflected on carla harris’s words, “i have learned that the way to grow your power is indeed to give it away.” ( 2021 laetare medalist address-bycarla harris moreau fye week five ) as a freshman i hope to make time to get involved in service, and exemplify a “force for good” in this world. likewise, in the poem i wrote the following week i was reminded of my home and the values that have been instilled in me since a child. i value inclusion, exploration, determination, kindness, and hope. ( "where i'm from” -by george ella lyon moreau week 6)where i have been, the family i have been raised in, and the friends i chose have all been factors in shaping my core values which drive me to make decisions each day i am here at notre dame. last week was a good opportunity to review implicit biases. in my senior year i conducted a research project on the maternal mortality crisis for women of color and how implicit bias is the leading cause of these disparities. as a future health care worker, i believe that implicit bias training and reflection is critical to becoming an advocate for my future https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html patients. ("how to think about 'implicit bias'"-by scientific americanmoreau week 7) understanding that we all have biases is so important, and in my dorm and throughout campus this year i hope to build a more inclusive culture at notre dame, and learn how i can become better myself. throughout each week of moreau i have identified with one of core values and beliefs that make me who i am. as i continue throughout my journey, i hope to discover more of these values and create relationships that will last for a lifetime. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ integration assignment my past journey is part of who i am becoming by: 1. i believe you need to uncover your past to lead you into your future through family and faith. 2. i believe you need to surround yourself with good people in order to reach your full potential. 1. throughout my whole life, i have struggled to find who i truly am. constantly searching for the correct answer that must be perfect, i have recently discovered that nothing will be perfect but that we are all on a journey to find our true passions and authentic selves. a quote that really resonated with me was from a video from father pete when he stated that "the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be. the person that god has created you to be" ("the role of faith in our story" by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3). an important part of that quote is that i am journeying to find the person that god created me to be. god and faith have always been at the center of my life. it is always a lifeline that i can fall back on during hard times, which may be one of my core problems. when things in my life are going well, i have a hard time reflecting on what i do wrong, and as a result, my sins become more profound and more potent in my day-to-day life. i believe moving forward, i need to dig deeper in my spiritual life and cleanse what is impure. i need to follow david brooks' advice from his tedtalk where he stated that "you go into yourself, you find the sin, which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin, out of which the others emerge. and you fight that sin, and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering then a depth of character is constructed" ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks, ted moreau fye week 2). from uncovering what drives me off course the most, i can build resilience against that sin. as sins begin to come about constantly in my life, i tend to go numb. i block out friends, family, and school work as i become emotionless, but i've learned that "you can't numb those hard feelings with numbing those other affects or emotions. you can't selectively numb. so when you numb those, we numb joy; we numb gratitude; we numb happiness… and then we feel vulnerable" ("the power of vulnerability" by brene brown moreau fye week one). in these situations, i need to do something that makes me feel again. either trying something new or letting my emotions reveal themselves. one technique that helped me get over my "numbness" and dive deeper into my roots which has allowed me to uncover who i really am, was the "where i'm from" poem. it can be used as a place to let your emotions and feelings spill out in a safe place. "you can also see it as a corridor of doors opening onto further knowledge and other kinds of writing. the key is to let yourself explore these rooms. don't rush to decide what kind of writing you're going to do or to revise or finish a piece. let your goal be the writing itself. learn to let it lead you" ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). through this writing journey, i have discovered that my family is of enormous importance to me. my family is the motivation that drives me to become the best version of myself. my family has had many health struggles, which creates many negative and sad stories in my past. "but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many stories that formed me" ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week 7). however, looking back on those hard times, i need to also remember the good times i've had with them. these positive experiences have also shaped who i am today. through my past involving my family and wrestling with my faith, i will continue to grow. my past will become a part of me that shapes what i am becoming. 2. all throughout high school, i struggled to make friends. it wasn't because i was socially awkward or seen as weird, but simply because i struggled to see who actually wanted me in their lives. like most kids at notre dame, they were probably one of the most intelligent people in their class. for me, at least, people took advantage of this gift i had. they would see me in class and try to make an effort "to be my friend." however, the friendships i thought i had formed turned out to be solely for the other person's grade. as a result of so-called friends ghosting me after the semester, i would routinely spend summers alone. vivid memories of this began to flood back to me as i read this quote from the week 4 moreau assignment. "'attention is one of the rarest forms of love.' this quote might strike home if you've ever been tuned out by a friend who's constantly checking their phone. we all know what it's like to talk with someone who's not really present in the conversation." ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week 4). i realized that i needed to completely let go and forgive these people. i need to deeply understand that i hold value, and that i need to see and, as carla harris put it, "trust the power in [me]" ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5). i need to trust in the power and motivation that my past brings because what has led me to today will also lead me to where god needs me to be. who i am now is part of who i am becoming. week 8 integration i theo helm moreau first-year-experience 10 october 15, 2021 my journey and how i will move forward moreau first-year-experience has already given me so much insight on my life and the ramifications i can have in other’s lives as well. i firmly believe that my life is meant to help others and not put myself first. i believe that i need to stand up for myself and more importantly others, and be a force for good. i believe that being at the university of notre dame will and already has fundamentally changed me to be more oriented towards others and look for the ones who truly need to be recognized within our community. these core beliefs are formed from the experience’s i have had on campus so far and my upbringing. it is the fact that “i am from these moments” and experiences which give me these beliefs (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). one incredibly powerful experience i’ve had here at the university of notre dame has to be the football games. the whole atmosphere of the stadium and the game is amazing. there is truly nothing else like it. the way you are able to connect with the students around you and all root for a common cause is powerful. it is one of the few times ever that the collective student body will cheer for one singular thing: an irish victory. it's this power we have around us that is felt through the entire stadium. carla harris’ laetare medal speech which happened to also be at the same stadium, echoed these same sentiments. she said we have the “power to create power, power to define power, … power to empower other people most importantly” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). this is an important truth to be known. having the power to make others better is something that the world takes for granted too many times which makes it refreshing for it to be so omnipotent on the notre dame campus. her http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 words truly exemplify the culture and impact humans can have on their own experience of life; however, we usually disregard this incredible ability. it is our duty to make sure that as notre dame students we transform this unique power to the outer world past south bend. this is something that many may have a problem with, but empowering others to do their best is of the utmost importance to be a better person. brene brown says that we must have “the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week 1). all of us only live in this world for a miniscule amount of time compared to the entirety of man. it is almost impossible to make a mark big enough for one to be remembered for eternity. however, this is irrelevant, instead we must be remembered for the kindness and thoughtfulness we show others. we must not disrespect anybody through pressure as well. part of respecting others is respecting that different people have their own thoughts. the one love foundation formed a video about this and emphasized alcohol induced peer pressure. in the video someone who had pressured their friend instantly realizes the impact they had on them. they say “because i love you i’m so sorry i was wasted” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week 4). this is the complete opposite of what we should want in our lives and our relationships. common respect is the number one priority. as long as it is from the people that matter to us the most, this should be what we strive for. chimamanda ngozi adichie had a very interesting college roommate situation. she is from africa and her roommate was completely unfamiliar with african culture. her roommate unknowingly belittled her through her comments she made about her heritage. chimamanda ngozi adichie identified it as if “she felt sorry for me… a patronizing well meaning pity” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). this would be a horrible experience to have to go through. https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_the_power_of_vulnerability?language=en https://www.joinonelove.org/act/because-i-love-you/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story#t-296388 however, chimamanda ngozi adichie was able to respect the fact that her roommate had little knowledge of african culture and was basically just going off of archaic stereotypes. it is this ability that chimamanda ngozi adichie showed that we as humans need to all share. even when we ourselves are belittled, we must treat them with even more kindness. attempting to embody everything that has been said is difficult. it is almost impossible to be respectful and kind every moment of every day. our mood shifts frequently, and this is part of the human condition. david brooks tells us that “we are not taught in this culture to wrestle with our sin” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). to be able to realize that we are all sinners but are still loved is paramount to recognize. it allows us to realize we are not perfect but that is not something we should try to achieve and would be a fallacy. it is hard to imagine but fr. pete mccormick tells us that “you are better off looking at your knot with a fresh set of eyes” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3). fr. pete expertly compares the problems we have in our life to a shoelace knot. trying to untangle a shoelace knot is one of the most aggravating things there is in this world. trying to untie it is excruciatingly annoying and time consuming, but it takes careful consideration about what steps one might take to untie it. our philosophical and theological problems with faith and religion can be solved similarly to a shoelace knot. our struggles with god and his presence in human’s lives can take years to decipher; however, we must all be patient and discern what we are encountering in our lives. word count: 1025 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry our experiences bring us together beginning our time in college with brene brown’s tedtalk was an excellent, immersive introduction into the ideals of notre dame and the goals of the moreau class. listening to brown’s experiences, i realized i connected to some of her statements, and they made me realize what i find important. her discussion of self-love especially spoke to me. the people “who have a strong sense of love and belonging… [b]elieve they’re worthy”; the ones who provide their own validation are the ones who receive the most authenticity from others (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brownmoreau fye week one). i strongly believe in the power that our thoughts have over our feelings, emotions, and moods. both in my own personal life and in the lives of my friends, i have seen the power that our minds and our thoughts have. mental health, especially within elite education is such an important topic because it is such a prevalent issue. throughout my time here, both in classes and out of classes, i have seen both the effects of mental health as well the amazing amount of support and concern that people have for each other. even when first getting to know people in my dorm and in my classes, everyone was always so friendly and genuinely cared about how others were doing. the type of people who come to notre dame, when they arrive, do not lose their sense of concern or care for others. it would be very easy for a school like notre dame to become ultra-competitive between students. however, it is not; people here genuinely care about each other. even while working hard to build their resume, people still put all of their effort into also living out their eulogy qualities. despite the high-pressure environment, notre dame students care for their adam ii. neglecting the adam ii “turns you into a shrewd animal who treats life as a game, and you become a cold, calculating creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity,” but notre dame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 students nurture their relationships and their adam ii (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week two). i fully believe that as humans, we need to nurture our adam ii. i have learned ever since i was little that caring for each other is the best impact that we can leave on this world. not only do notre dame students have to balance their social and educational lives, but they also have to balance their religious lives. i have learned that adding this third aspect into the balance of life makes you adjust all of your previous time management. i believe that some sort of faith is an important aspect of everybody’s lives no matter what religious tradition. it brings people hope and gives people something to turn to in dark times. i also believe that it can be very difficult for everyone to remember to turn back to their faiths all the time. we have a tendency to focus on the “cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerbergmoreau fye week three). it can be easy for us to focus on ourselves, but everywhere on campus and in class, there are reminders to the students to remember their faiths and that they always have a place to turn to. notre dame promotes these resources for any situation a student might find themselves in. the discussion of healthy friendships and relationships is extremely important as students enter the entirely new environment of college. everyone is looking to meet people, and while the majority of notre dame students are genuine people, there are times when people do not work well in a relationship. i believe that it takes time to find people who we genuinely connect with and who will become lifelong friends. in my experience, true friendships take time to find and build. it is easy when people receive attention to believe they have found a good friend, and this is because “‘[a]ttention is one of the rarest forms of love’” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor -moreau fye week four). however, that attention does not https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ always last. although we believe we will be friends with the first people we meet, i believe that it might take time for people to find their groups. i also believe that everyone will find close friendships. even if our first friendships, or even other things fail on the first try, there will always be more chances. the discussion of failure is a topic that many people, especially people at notre dame, avoid. although failure is inevitable, and everyone knows that failure is inevitable, we still prefer to believe that we are capable of avoiding it in life. i believe that failures can help us if we allow them to, but we can also let them drown us if we are not careful. i have struggled with seeing my failures as bringing me “a gift… called experience” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harrismoreau fye week five). during my time in notre dame, i am working towards viewing, even small inconveniences, as opportunities for growth rather than problems in my life. i get the opportunity to learn from my past rather than be upset by it. working on the poem and reflecting on my past was a very different experience. reflecting on the fact the “[n]o one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyonmoreau fye week six), i realized i wanted to think carefully about what i wrote in my poem. i believe that through sharing our past with others, not only can we learn about ourselves, we can also teach others. it also allows us to form a deeper connection with others. i want to work on learning more from others’ pasts. my past is generally very different from those i have been around, and i believe there is a lot i can learn from those differences. learning from others’ pasts and experiences also helps us to learn to be more accepting and inclusive. the inclusive ideals on the notre dame campus are heavily and openly promoted. everyone on campus wants to ensure that all people feel welcome. throughout campus, classes, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html and clubs, me and other students feel welcome and accepted. however, that does not mean that everyone’s brains are not “noticing patterns and making generalizations” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. dorismoreau fye week seven). that does not mean people are bad people though. we all need to work to continue to educate ourselves throughout our lives to work to eliminate our inherent implicit biases. education is the best way to eliminate implicit biases in all people and continue the work towards equality and inclusivity. moreau has really helped me to study the beliefs i hold and why i hold them. it has allowed me to explore how my beliefs shape my opinions and my life. it has also allowed me to hear and explore different beliefs. i have gotten the opportunity to learn about and from other people’s experiences. exploring my own beliefs and exploring others’ beliefs have helped me to develop my own root beliefs. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ moreau integration two charles luke charles luke drew espeseth moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 my first chapter at notre dame these few short months that have made up the beginning of my college experience have been a period of greater change than any other time in my life. as the semester progresses however, i am more able each day to try to make sense of what all this new information means. what first felt like an influx of new ideas and encounters too overwhelming to make anything of, eventually turned to new knowledge and a few changes in thinking for me. once i learned how to belong here, that i did belong, it became much easier to slow down and analyze what was being thrown at me. the things that i have experienced in only a single college semester have made a great impact on my way of thinking and are forcing me to make decisions on how to respond to what is happening in the world around me. first, i believe that not only fitting in but also belonging to the notre dame community makes it much easier to settle in and take the changes of college one step at a time. during my first few weeks on campus i was afraid that everyone else was smarter, more athletic, or just overall superior in most ways to me. what i felt is impostor syndrome, and until i learned to overcome it i had no chance at making it through college. “intense feelings of imposterism can prevent people from sharing their great ideas or applying for jobs and programs where they’d excel” (“what is impostor syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). i never realized i had imposter syndrome until coming to notre dame. looking back though, i can see it in the way i acted and the attitude i had toward certain opportunities. things such as going to all https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo star basketball showcases or running for student government i decided against because even though i had nothing to lose, i was overwhelmed with the feeling that i either wouldn’t be good enough or even worse i would somehow be embarrassed. once i started to feel comfortable, i realized what i consider to be one of the biggest problems in america was just as bad here. watching two students in a club mercilessly belittle and insult each other over a difference in political opinion was something new to me. in high school, nobody cared about politics because nobody could vote. i am not saying students should take that approach here because politics do determine our country’s fate and are thus necessary for discussion. however, if this discussion just turns into an attack of ad hominems then i think it would be more productive to leave it alone. president jenkins says, “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). this quote from fr. jenkins sums up this problem and it is one that does not seem as if it is getting better. political parties and ideologies continue to divide our country much more than they should. the problem is, as fr. jenkins later highlighted, both sides want change but neither side wants to change themself. this split separates family, friends, and americans at large and to what end? i understand the issues are important but if both sides refuse to acknowledge the other as reasonable, then we are not going to get anywhere. continuing that thought, i believe the biggest reason for this divide is racism and the unwillingness to accept the difference of race and diversity as good things. in one of this course’s videos agustin fuentes says, “race and racism are malleable, alterable” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). i disagree strongly with how professor fuentes groups race and racism together in this statement and throughout the video because they https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 are not the same thing nor do all the same things apply to both. a person’s race is a part of their identity and cannot be changed, and that is a good thing. people of all origins should be proud of where they came from and be proud of their unique differences. racism on the other hand is evil and while it could be potentially altered, i think that idea goes against the concept of “implicit bias” mentioned several times in this course. finally, the biggest part of this issue that is being ignored is the absence of god. sure, both sides might claim to be involved with god, yet both sides continue to do unholy things. c.s. lewis says about hardships, “now it may surprise you to learn that in his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this quote said by screwtape states something that is backed by thousands of testimonies. god often finds people at their lowest, with no one to turn to, and gives them peace. it is possible to turn to god when things are going well, but more often than not we ignore him. things are going smoothly so why would we need his help? it is not usually until we are at our lowest, with nowhere else to turn, that we finally give in to the love god has been offering the whole time. i hope our community and country are like this too. i do not know if we are at our lowest yet, but we are certainly very low, and hopefully in a place where god can find us. ultimately, i believe that god is in control and people will figure things out here soon. i hope so anyway. this first semester has taught me so much about others, myself, and the world at large. there will always be problems with the world, our country, and our community, but we should meet these issues as a whole and head on. i think the world needs to figure itself out, and my suggestion is to do that with empathy toward each other and by following god. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 natalie gonzalez moreau first-year experience erik oswald 15th october, 2021 to reason like christ i believe that navigating life decisions is a trial-and-error type deal. if there was a morally correct answer for every decision, then i believe that the world would be a much better place. unfortunately, we live in a world where satan is real, so we must continue to come to the father and ask him for discernment in all circumstances in our lives. i believe that first, we must clearly know where we belong in this world. knowing who we are sets a firm foundation of beliefs that we base every decision upon. i am a christ-follower, and i believe that every answer is embedded in the word of god. i find my identity in christ, and therefore i allow my feelings and judgments to be guided by his truth. one way to grow in faith is by creating christ-centered relationships. we can do this by having vulnerability with each other. brene brown spoke in her ted talk about “the power of vulnerability” and discussed the struggle of going through life alone due to hidden insecurities and walls we put up when we are around people (mfye week 1). i understood my need for god, and because of that, i needed to not only be vulnerable with christ but with humans too. sharing testimonies, for example, requires a great deal of vulnerability, and when you open up to someone about your story, it allows for an intuitive, trusting relationship. as a christ-follower, serving others in this form is essential. i believe that a life-giving relationship can be defined as a connection between two people that allows for spiritual growth. spiritual growth is what i believe we should all strive for in life because without conviction and living for a greater purpose other than yourself, then what value do you hold in this life? olivia t. taylor, grotto, explained the “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship,” and a quote that she mentioned was that, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face.”(mfye week 4). this allows us to reflect on what kind of relationships we are investing our time in today and question whether they are life-giving relationships. i see no purpose in a community where there is no mutual spiritual growth. god called us to be in a community with other active believers to hold us accountable to do the will of god every day of our lives. during my time here at notre dame, i have intentionally built relationships where i know mutual spiritual growth will be. i believe that i actively seek self-knowledge every day of my life. i’m blessed to see so clearly what my purpose and belonging are in this short life. seeking the will of the lord every day grants me fulfillment like no other, knowing that i’m a faithful servant and that god is pleased with my devotion to him every day. it is vital to maintain an eternal perspective to allow us to value the uttermost meaningful devotions in our lives. in his ted talk titled, “should you https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/modules/items/109571 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim live for your resume... or your eulogy?” (mfye week 2), david brooks described two different life perspectives. it is essential to stop and think about what we are living for. if it’s not for god, then what is the purpose of your life? if it is for god, then how are you living your day-to-day life to glorify him? i raise these questions to myself whenever i feel a sense of worthlessness and confusion. even though sometimes i don’t feel his presence or see him working in my life, i remain faithful and rely on him to guide me through today and every day forward in my life. professor david fagerberg wrote an article titled “faith brings light to a dark world,” in which he states that “everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary” (mfye week 3). i believe that i pursue truth by keenly asking god to work through me today and to reveal his truth to me so that i may live for what is right and not be deceived to fall for what is wrong. we must not only seek to know god’s truth but also desire to have wisdom. in the book of james 1:22, it says, “but don’t just listen to god’s word. you must do what it says. otherwise, you are only fooling yourselves.” if we notice ourselves becoming too comfortable with just listening and agreeing with god’s word and not actually doing anything about it, then are we living a faithful life? it is important to keep god in the center of our lives because he deserves to be, not because we allow him to be. it is my frequent prayer to ask god to give me wisdom in every circumstance and to give it to me generously. in any uncertain situation, i seek his truth to guide my every decision. i believe that my purpose is to live out the plan of the lord. i believe that it is important to follow personal desires and make a career out of that, but i also think it is equally or more important to seek the will of god because that is what we are created to do in this world. there are times when your desires align with god’s plan, but you will only achieve that if you choose to live for christ and not for the world. we can make many plans, but that does not mean they will be carried out the way we want them to. in sorin's letter to father basil moreau, he said, “man proposes, god disposes” (mfye week 5). this means that you can ask god to grant you the wishes you want and to help you live out your plan, but ultimately his plan for you will prevail. it is in proverbs 18:21 where this is said. knowing this has given me comfort in knowing that god will change my heart to love whatever he wants me to do in the life that he gave me. i find peace and comfort knowing that i am made in the image of god. i know he is the author of my life, and i find joy in knowing that he designed my background. i (natalie gonzalez) wrote a poem about where i'm from (mfye week 6). i believe that many people know there is a god and that he created all things on earth, so there isn’t much of a challenge i face when i trust that god knows me better than i know myself. he knew me before i was born, he knows me now, and he knows my future. he knows of my sin, yet he still chooses to love me. it is a perspective i will never understand for myself. like christ, let's invest time in getting to know each other’s hearts and understanding that other people’s beliefs are based on past experiences. in her ted talk titled “the danger of a single story,” chimamanda ngozi adichie mentioned that stories are defined by how they are told, who https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://nd4-my.sharepoint.com/:w:/g/personal/ngonzal4_nd_edu/es7725--fs5ppsdz6mdytv4bkgpfg18l7ilnhbqlldgrnq?e=d1wb1n https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next tells them, and when they are told (mfye week 7). we should all have a curiosity-driven mindset to understand each other’s perspectives because when we choose to base a belief only on one story, then there isn’t much personal or spiritual growth to be done. i seek to love my brothers and sisters in christ and pray that i may serve my community according to god’s will. i am actively doing this on campus, and whether it’s grabbing dinner, going to bible study, or worshiping together, these events open opportunities for deep and fruitful conversations. week 13 integration 2 riley 1 kiara riley professor retartha moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 encountering challenges and navigating through college throughout my first semester of college, i have inevitably encountered numerous different challenges. overtime, i have gradually learned and gained the skills necessary to overcome these challenges. the first major challenge i encountered this semester pertains to my tendency of setting unrealistic and high expectations for myself. my perfectionist mindset i had in high school travelled with me to college. author julia hogan discusses in her article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” the relationship between expectations and individual worth. she states, “if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite like we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). this statement from hogan’s piece really resonated with me because it portrays exactly how i feel when i fail to meet my expectations i set for myself. during this first semester, specifically, i set very unrealistic expectations for my physical and mental health. i expected and promised myself that i would do some form of exercise every day, whether that was going to the gym, running around the lake, going for a walk, etc. i failed to meet this expectation of myself, as i sometimes find it difficult to find free time to devote to my physical health. every single day that i was not intentionally physically active made me feel very upset and disappointed in myself. i felt, just like hogan states, like i wasn’t “good enough” because i would see other girls around me successfully find time to work out every day when i could not. i slowly, however, realized that my expectation that i had to rigorously work out every day was very unreasonable. i overcame this challenge and expectation by creating a workout plan that aligns with my schedule. my plan is to simply work out when i want or in between riley 2 tough assignments when i need a mind break. one should not feel worthless or as upset as i was when he or she is not physically active every day. the feelings i had on those nights when i was too busy to work out were very unhealthy and not beneficial to both my physical and mental health. i grew to be able to stop comparing myself and my schedule to my peers around me. the second major challenge i encountered was remembering and sticking to my morals as a catholic and follower of christ. my parents instilled in me at a young age to behave and treat every individual with compassion and unconditional kindness, regardless of the individual’s race, gender, social status, class rank, etc. i try to, everyday, in college to keep my strong faith and morals in my mind as i interact with my friends, teachers, or any individual i encounter. a large aspect of catholicism, in my opinion, is not focussing on individuals’ superficial or materialistic values, but instead on their heart and character. we are all humans created by christ, and allowing social constructs to determine how we treat one another only creates more division in our society. in “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?”, author christopher j. devron discusses every individual’s personal responsibility of being cognizant of their morals and the manner in which they treat other human beings. he wrote, “it places on us the moral obligation to consider every person as our brother or sister, our sibline or neighbor, regardless of social constructs such as race” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten). devron’s statements in his article directly align with my belief that it is important to not let social constructs like race separate and divide us. it is essential to love and treat every human being with kindness no matter where he or she comes from or his or her appearance. when searching for friends this semester, i made sure to keep my morals and faith in mind when interacting with others. i changed and continue to change my behavior to make sure that it is always a direct representation of my character and genuine self. riley 3 the third major challenge i encountered this semester was finding honest and genuine relationships in my community. the foundation and basis of every relationship is loyalty, trust and honesty. i have been searching for loyal and trustworthy friends since i arrived on campus and i can happily say that i have found individuals who i can be vulnerable with and a safe place where i can express my true personality. i am never in fear of being judged by this group and i know that they will be a part of my life for a long time. it took me a while, however, to find these individuals, but it is so refreshing to be able to say that my search for these friends is over. in “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, palmer explains the importance of a trustworthy place. he wrote, “leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space in which human resourcefulness may be evoked” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). palmer discusses how a successful community needs to have a leader who prioritizes creating a “trustworthy space” for his or her people. trust between a leader and his or her people is essential in order for the society to be organized and for the people to be resourceful. a trustworthy space, as i know from my experience, creates a place for people to be vulnerable and honest with one another. i am so thankful and grateful that i remained patient until i found friends who i can be my genuine self around and who simply care about me. staying patient during this process was a major challenge for me because i expected to find and make these friendships really early on in the semester. i gradually realized, however, that this expectation was very unrealistic. the last challenge i encountered and overcame pertains to my comfort zone. even in high school, it was very difficult for me to extend beyond my comfort zone in almost every aspect of my life. the idea of being uncomfortable really frightens me, and because of that, i avoid putting myself in any situation or position where i would potentially be uncomfortable. i find myself riley 4 constantly relying on others to pull me out of my comfort zone because i am incapable of doing so myself. my experiences in college, however, forced me to leave my comfort zone and face a variety of different and unfamiliar situations. i slowly learned that i need to be the person to pull myself out of my comfort zone in order for me to grow. in “hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king, king explains that one has to be willing to leave his or her comfort zone in order to see growth. he wrote, “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week twelve). just like king states, an individual needs to be willing and eager to leave his or her comfort zone in order for the individual to make any progress in leaving his or her comfort zone and in order to grow. i completely agree with king’s statements, and i need to continue to take risks and force myself outside of my comfort zone even if it scares me. i do see growth in this area of my life, however, because i have stopped overthinking every decision i make and have noticed that i have been taking more academic and social risks outside of my comfort zone. i am so proud of myself and of my growth this past semester. i have encountered and overcame many different challenges and obstacles and have developed into a new and independent young woman. i am much more confident in my decision making and no longer associate my worth with whether or not i meet my expectations. this growth in my life needs to continue, and i strongly believe that it will because i am surrounded by the right people and am in a safe space to do so. my personal development and growth 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https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ +hdolqj�7kurxjk�.lqwvxjl�:runvkrs´ e\�*urwwr��0ruhdx�:hhn������,�kdg�qhyhu�frqvflrxvo\�wkrxjkw�wkdw khduweuhdn�zdv�d�jrrg�wklqj�dqg�wkdw�lw�khosv�shrsoh�jurz�lqwr�ehwwhu�yhuvlrqv�ri�wkhpvhoyhv��exw�, vrphzkdw�xvhg�wklv�frqfhsw�lq�p\�uhvsrqvh�wr�p\�judghv��1rz�wkdw�,�nqrz�dqg�xqghuvwdqg�wklv��lq�wkh ixwxuh��p\�dqvzhuv�zloo�eh�wr�dozd\v�vhh�wkh�srvlwlyhv�lq�p\�ghihdwv�dqg�lq�p\�idloxuhv�ehfdxvh�,�zloo dozd\v�ohduq�iurp�wkhp�dqg�zloo�xvh�wkhp�wr�vxffhhg�qh[w�wlph��%\�ohduqlqj�derxw�wklv�duw�dqg�nqrzlqj wkdw�vr�pdq\�shrsoh�sudfwlfh�lw�wr�ehfrph�vwurqjhu�dqg�ehwwhu��,�uhdol]hg�wkdw�,�fdq¶w�gzhoo�rq�wkh�sdvw�dqg p\�plvwdnhv�ehfdxvh�wkdw�zloo�kxuw�ph��,qvwhdg��,�nqrz�qrz�wkdw�zkloh�,�gr�qhhg�wr�ohw�wkhp�jr�dqg�irujhw derxw�wkhp��,�fdq�xvh�wkhp�dv�d�ohduqlqj�wrro�iru�ehfrplqj�ehwwhu�dqg�vxffhhglqj�lq�wkh�ixwxuh� https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ sammie mcgurl moreau integration two moreau throughout my first semester at notre dame i have encountered many new things: people, classes, experiences, and so many others. i have met people from all over the country and even from all over the world. i have had classes taught by professors from all different backgrounds on all different subjects. i have lived in a dorm room with a roommate from a completely different part of the country and with a completely different background from myself. i have eaten two to three meals a day in a dining hall rather than my own dining room table. i have moved 12 hours away from my home and family to come to a great school. i have experienced seven home college football games. i have laughed. i have cried. and i have had so much fun. there have been days that i have wanted to leave. and days where i wanted nothing more than to be here. through it all, i have remained faithful to the lord, and the lessons throughout the weeks of moreau have helped gain a greater insight into how to carry myself and respond to challenges and all the other new experiences i have been having. in week 9, the main points were about dissonance, and that included imposter syndrome and making mistakes in our lives. in one of the articles we read, julia hogan wrote that “none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes […] but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). this was my favorite quote from this week’s material. i personally often have a hard time letting go of when i make mistakes because i am always striving to be the best person that i can be. it can be difficult in the short run to see that it isn’t the end of the world just because i made one stupid mistake and setting a goal of not making any mistakes is simply unattainable. it is impossible to go through life without making mistakes, so we should just set the expectation that there will be mistakes but that everything will also be okay when we make them. my time at notre dame so far is teaching me this lesson slowly but surely. although i haven’t made any huge, life-changing mistakes here, i certainly make small mistakes daily. whether it is getting some questions wrong on an assignment or an exam or not handling a situation with a friend in the best way possible, or even forgetting to check in on my loved ones back home, i am learning that it is okay to make these mistakes. and although we, as humans, don’t want to make mistakes, we are simply imperfect and continually make the same mistakes. all we can do is look to the next thing and keep going and trying to be the best without beating ourselves up for making a human error. in week 10, we kind of continued on with a similar theme that when we face trials and come into contact with things that are hard, we must turn to one another and build each other up, because in the end, we are all human beings. in his commencement address, fr. john jenkins said that “hatred poisons everything” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week ten). humans often turn toward hatred when they are wronged or feel like they have been. however, fr. jenkins rather simply remarks on this concept, saying that hatred is wrong and is basically like a disease that spreads and makes everything that it touches “sick”. on the other hand, dealing again with more of the internal dissonance touched on in the previous week, i really enjoyed the video about the kintsugi pottery and about how we can put all the broken pieces back together again and make a single piece that is even more beautiful than the original one. there are many problems in our crazy world, both internal and external, but they don’t have to define us, and that doesn’t have to make our world dark, broken, and disgusting. rather, we can take each of the pieces and put everything back together again into an even more beautiful complete story. in week 11, we began to focus more heavily on community and diversity within that community, which began to touch more on aspects of external dissonance. when faced by both internal and external strife, the immediate human response is often to be filled with dread or despair. when we think about all the problems within our communities, we can sometimes look at them as problems to be fixed rather than the true gifts that they really are. in the text we read there was a beautiful quote that said “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). this really changed my perspective on how i see community, because of course i value the members of my community, but sometimes it can be rather hard for me to value my community as a whole. i often find myself looking very critically on the problems that exist within my community rather than embracing its beauty and the true glory of what a cohesive community could be. i can fall into this trap of looking at it more like a responsibility or something to fix or change, but i should look to see it more as a gift and something glorious to be attained. when i face hardships, i often turn just to a few people, but i should be looking to my whole beautiful community as a support system to lift me and encourage me. as i have been at notre dame for almost a whole semester now, i feel myself starting to appreciate the whole overall community and know that i can always rely on it for full support in a time of need. in week 12, we turned to looking more at hope in general and even more specifically, hope in christ. a beautiful quote from the document about holy cross education reads “still, the first four principles of mind, heart, zeal, and family, important though they are, would have little distinctive christian purpose apart from hope in the cross of christ” (“hope-holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 12). the second half of the semester we talked about conflict a lot, and at the end we finally moved on to what i would like to call the ‘good news’. we can get through all of the hardships and conflict that we talked about simply by putting our faith and hope in christ. he is the final person we should always look to in times of need and even when things are going as near to perfect as possible. in conclusion, these last few weeks of moreau and my time at notre dame thus far has taught me so much about handling new experiences, especially those involving some form of conflict. i know that it’s okay to mess up, it’s good to turn to community, and we must ultimately always place our hope in the lord. through it all, everything will ultimately be okay if i place my faith in god and hold myself with grace and dignity always. with a little faith, everything will work out in the end. integration paper 2 charles r. wang father kevin the grand lever everyone has a different purpose in life, and yet everything coexists so well that makes the world go around (week 1 qqc, dr. brown: “what gives purpose and meaning to our lives”). sure, it may go around, but definitely not smoothly. with all the differences everyone has there is bound to be collision and competition. those two things lead to difficulty and negative events happening. racism and discrimination are two things out of many others that are proof that our world isn’t perfect. but if everyone does their part, we may just be able to make the world a slightly better place. this leads me to talk about what i’m made for. during my childhood, i would go through phases of different career ideas that i wanted to pursue. in the beginning, like every other boy’s dream, i wanted to become a professional athlete. my physical statistics and my athletic accomplishments allowed me to believe that i would be able to pursue an athletic career. i played on the jr. nba team in china, i was athlete of the year since sophomore year of my high school, i won tournaments region-wide. these things made me believe that i was capable of competing at the highest level. but as i stepped out of my bubble and looked around, i wasn’t good enough. i wasn’t near good enough and i was constantly told by my parents that i wasn’t good enough, and for once, they weren’t lying. i then wanted to become a lawyer, but that was only because i wanted to watch the tv series “suits”. then i wanted to become a cook, but then i realized culinary school was one of the most competitive environments of the entire world, and that the chef path wasn’t one that really intrigued me anymore. (week 2 qqc, searching for self-knowledge) as you can tell, all of the careers that i just previously am one that are glamorous and overachieving. but now, i just want to help other people. as basic and generic as that sounds i want to go into consulting and just solve problems. (week 3 qqc, self-focus) sure, consulting may not be as interesting as a chef, basketball player or a lawyer, but a consultant can still make an impact on the world too. being a consultant is only the first career that i want, as it composes of helping people and solving problems. and i feel like if i just do my part in helping solve crucial problems, and helping people at the same time, what else can i wish for? (week 4 qqc, searching for life-giving relationships) in my head all along, even when i was growing up, i realized that if i could help or make an impact on one human being, that is good enough for me. i hope i could impact more than just one, but imagine the change the world would have with just one life changed. in which i think consulting would be the perfect job for me. i would be able to make differences in businesses, businesses that make impacts on many others. my parents didn’t raise me to not make an impact, but they also didn’t pressure me to make the biggest impacts on the world. i was always raised on the thoughts that if you can change one person’s life, you have done your job. because if that person who you made an impact on makes an impact on someone else, then the impact boundaries are limitless. but all of what i am made for, relates back to what i am made of. my lever to move the world all come back to my family. three distinct different groups of my family. these three are honestly the people i would die for, these people are those who shaped me to become who i am today, changed me for the better, made me who i am. and these three groups are correspondingly: my parents, my brother, and my grandparents. of course, my parents are one of these groups because, first of all they made me and also shaped me as they were the ones who were always by my side continuously. throughout every stage of my life, they were there. there are the ones that pay for my tuition, that want me to really succeed the most. they are the fundamentals of my life, they were the ones who punished me when i did the wrong things, they were the ones who rewarded me when i did great things. and they will forever be one of the most important people in my life as i continue to be a fraction of who they are today. then there is my brother. due to the 6-year age difference between him and i, he was practically the definition of what a brother may be, but he was also a role model, someone i could continuously ask for help with and someone who would just help me live through the important portions of my life. as he has previously felt the wrath of my parents during high school and college, he could guide me through my lowest periods of life. yes, admittedly during high school, i was diagnosed with depression and the anxiety attacks i would get back in the day were rough. and i did keep it to myself for a year, but i eventually opened up to my friends and of course my brother. then like a brother would do, he guided me to go see therapy, and was always an outlet and input in my daily progress back to who i am today. then there are my grandparents. (week 6 qqc) they are forever my day one, and like i said in my poem of who i am, they are the reason why the world is so grand today. i mean that from the bottom of my heart. this is to the point where i want to get the word grand tatted on me, because it would represent my grandparents and how they make the world so grand. i remember back to a few years ago where i was super against getting tattoos, but now i am willing to go against that just for them. because i want them to be with me wherever i go, and be able to have their impact with me my entire life as it is everlasting. moreau integration 2 moreau first year experience 11/27/2021 connections between moreau fye and my life coming to notre dame was certainly a new experience in my life. south bend is a full twenty-four hour drive away from my home in helena, montana, so the transition to college was bound to be something new. what excited me the most about college was the prospect of everything new. new people to meet, new classes to take, new professors to learn from, a new place to live, and new restaurants to eat at. with all of the new that was coming my way this fall, i was bound to face new challenges as well. in my life i have had a lot of great times and good fortune. i have also had enough challenges to put into perspective the joys of the high points. a man that i looked up to a lot growing up once told me that it is not what happens to you that defines you as a person, but rather how you respond to your circumstances. he also said that it is the response to hardship that proves the moral character of a person. through the highs and lows of my relatively short adult life, i have tried to live in a manner that would make that man proud. this integration for moreau first year seminar will cover life experiences that i have had, how i responded to these experiences, and how i may have been affected by or grown from them. the ted video what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it? is the first definition and description of imposter syndrome that i have ever seen, though i have heard it used from time to time in varying contexts. it seems to mean the constant feeling that you did not earn your accomplishments or do not deserve the credit that is being given to you. in a sense, i think everyone experiences this in one way or another. i would not say that i have ever had a serious enough struggle with these feelings to label it a syndrome, but i have experienced it nonetheless. one such instance was in my first couple weeks here. every day i met all kinds of people who had accomplished great things already, and seemed to be so much better than i was capable of becoming. when asked about classes that i was scared of taking, they responded that they actually were not that bad. these interactions worried me, but i decided that i would not let a little internal intimidation stop me from trying to do what i want to achieve. the video seems to suggest that we need to give credit to ourselves and keep track of positive feedback to help remind ourselves that we are not imposters in our position. going forward, i will try to remember to keep track of my accomplishments and positive feedback to remind myself that i deserve to be where i am. ("what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine) when giving a commencement address at the wesley theological seminary, father jenkins gives a quote from james madison in 1787: “a zeal for different opinions concerning religion, concerning government, and many other points … have … divided mankind into parties, inflamed them with mutual animosity, and rendered them much more disposed to vex and oppress each other than to co-operate for their common good.” as far as my experience goes, i have seen this kind of animosity and lack of cooperation mainly in reference to politics, where many people pick a party and solely side with them under any circumstances. many people in this day and age root for and defend their party like it is a sports team, and do not acknowledge the existence of common ground and a beneficial moderate position. this similarity between what james madison warned about and what is occurring today is both fascinating and frightening. in response to this challenge of increasing divide, fr. jenkins proposes something that we have heard since the beginning of our christian lives: love one another. this means that beliefs and differences aside, we first and foremost care for the good of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo each other and ourselves. ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten) in his article thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer writes: “when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration.” this quote highlighting the need for community leads directly into my experience. just like the quote suggests, i truly feel my need for friends and family in times of misfortune and struggles. though i may seem at times to be self-sufficient, palmer suggests that this is simply an illusion and we always rely on our community to lift us up. it serves as a good reminder for me to express gratitude to all the people and groups who help me on my way. ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) in the novel the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis, screwtape writes: “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys.” this quote is particularly interesting because it references the low points of faith, in which god seems to not be present at all. these described low points are very common occurrences, during which people feel very distant from their religious life. i, just like every other religious person, have experienced plenty of doubt in my life, where it seemed like god simply could not allow things to happen. even in these times, i have continued to believe and act in accordance to what i think is god’s will. screwtape narrates that the fact that a person continues to stay true to god during these times proves that they are as https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ strong in their faith as ever. ("the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve) all in all, the content covered in this course has been pretty relevant in my life. if i am able to take all these lessons to heart, i believe that i will be well prepared to live a healthy, successful, and good life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192386?wrap=1 integration two boennighausen 1 integration two 3 december 2021 encountering traditional college challenges and responding with mindset, compromise, and hope being a freshman in college has provided many opportunities for me to encounter new experiences. with every new thing i encounter, i must figure out how to respond in a way that is consistent with my personal values, needs, and desires. one of the first traditional college experiences i encountered was attempting to find a community or group of people i was comfortable around. this is usually a challenge, and i was not expecting to find a community that quickly. but i’m lucky to have already found not one, but three. i have a solid group of friends within my dorm, jfam; i have fellow players on the ultimate frisbee team; and i have the cast and crew of pemco, the student-run musical theater group on campus. in week 11, there was an emphasis on community. one of the sources talked about how “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” so we shouldn’t be stressed about seeking it out (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). at the time i questioned this part of the text because i’ve had experience with some spaces, such as the really large table in south dining hall, being inherently unwelcoming. jesus table’s physical features create a power dynamic that fosters already existing communities while intimidating those without a community. i still have this concern, but now i’ve come across an additional problem on the other side of this topic. whether i’ve seeked them out or they were given to me, i am now a part of three communities that all give plentiful opportunities for interaction and bonding. but it’s impossible for me to take part in everything each of them does because there simply aren’t enough hours in the day. so while it feels like i’ve been given the great gift of multiple communities to lean on, sometimes this gift begins to feel like a burden on days when i have to choose one over the others. i haven’t fully dealt with what i’ve encountered when it comes to my conflicting communities, but i believe i can find some relief through self reflection about the difference between missing out on events and not having any events to go to at all. in week 9, we talked about imposter syndrome as well as expectations. one quote that really stood out to me was about how people “set expectations for themselves” that they believe “symbolize their worth as people” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). during that week i reflected on how i often see the goals i set for myself as expectations. so when i fail to reach a goal, i am not satisfied by the fact that i tried; i’m frustrated with my lack of ability to meet the “expectation.” whenever i remember this, i feel better about not finishing all the homework i wanted to get done one day because i realize i’m just creating more stress for myself out of a non-stressful situation. i believe i can apply the same http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau boennighausen 2 strategy to my fear of missing out on even just one bonding opportunity with one of my communities. if i remember that i wouldn’t truly be “missing out” on opportunities to interact and connect with others unless i did not find these communities in the first place, then i feel better about skipping an activity. knowing i’m still part of the community even if i’m not 100% committed to all the community’s events reassures me that even if i’m missing an event, i’m not missing out on the relationships that form over longer periods than just one night. so the next time i have to decide between watching snl with my jfam friend, seeing a musical with pemco, or having team dinner with ultimate frisbee, i will try to be grateful just for having so many options for something to do on a monday night. another traditional college challenge i’ve encountered this semester is living with a roommate. we get along fine during the day, but there is some unaddressed tension that i believe occurs at night. my roommate usually goes to bed after me and wakes up before me, and from my perspective she is not very good at being quiet. i know some of my trouble is that i’m not used to sleeping with another person in the room and i know that is not her fault. i’ve had some success with eye masks and ear plugs. but opting to just block out all the light and noise on my end may not be the best solution because it doesn’t exactly address the core of the problem, and there was one instance where i actually communicated with my roommate and we settled on a compromise. in week 10, we read father jenkins 2012 commencement address, where he touched on the issues of hatred and compromise. a question he posed that stood out to me was, “when i refuse to compromise, is it because i love a principle, or because i hate the people on the other side?” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by father jenkins moreau fye week 10). reading this, i think of politics, and more specifically, partisanship in congress. but this seems like an extreme thing to apply to two college roommates. i realized that whatever conflict i had with my roommate wasn’t subject to national debate and centuries of two-party arguments. all i needed to do was talk to her. at one point in the semester, my roommate asked if we could turn off the fan while we slept because she had trouble sleeping with it on. at first, i immediately just said yes because i hate conflict. but the next day, i decided to tell her that i needed the fan on while i fell asleep because it helps drown out noise. i’m so glad i did that because we settled on a compromise: i would turn the fan on when i went to bed so i could fall asleep easier, then my roommate would turn it off when she went to bed. with any trouble that i have encountered or will encounter, there’s always a way to respond to it. each situation requires a different approach, but they are all based on one thing: hope. in week 12, we read a text that said, “moreau prayed that students would remember what they were at sainte-croix...but ultimately he could only hope” (“holy cross and christan education” pg 15 by campus ministry moreau fye week 12). so even when i have trouble grappling with the many communities i’m trying to be a part of or i’m frustrated with my roommate situation, having hope that things will get better or that it’s not the end of the world can make the load a lot more bearable. it always seems kind of cheesy to me, but when we had that final discussion about hope in class, i tried to take that with me to the library afterward when i had three essays to write. it still was not a fun time, but remaining positive and hopeful got me https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 boennighausen 3 actually writing ideas down. so when all else fails or i simply do not know how to respond to a situation, i’ll always have hope. moreau integration 1 (nuss) (1) a purposeful life at notre dame i found the lessons i learned from the past few weeks of moreau first year experience to be very helpful in understanding what goals i should set for myself, and ways in which i can search for things that will hold value for the rest of my life. these lessons relate to my current experiences at notre dame, and will likely apply for the rest of my time in college. through this course, i have determined the things that i am searching for, and the things i can do to improve myself and my community. i believe that i am on a search for belonging. searching for belonging is a very prevalent aspect being a freshman in college. nearly all first year students here enter school without knowing any of their classmates, and have a desire to fit in with the community. i believe that a sense of belonging can be established through bonds with others. forming strong friendships with other students can make one a part of the notre dame community. from moreau first year experience, i learned that this sense of connection and bonding is strengthened by vulnerability. vulnerability allows people to take emotional risks, and to have the courage to try new things. this willingness to talk to new people and try new activities is vital in finding a sense of belonging in college. in addition, vulnerability allows people to emotionally relate with others during good and bad times. it is important to experience a full spectrum of emotions in life, since “you can't numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects, our emotions. you cannot selectively numb.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). being able to experience emotions around others will help form a bond, and blocking out emotions will make it much more difficult to pursue a sense of belonging. additionally, i believe that i am on an internal search to discover my most authentic self. i have been told that college is an important time for self-discovery, and i think that in order to understand myself, i have to realize my own strengths and weaknesses. with this information, i can take steps to improve myself internally. however, it can be difficult to prioritize the development of internal strength over one’s external reputation and appearance to others, since, “the external logic is an economic logic: input leads to output, risk leads to reward. the internal side of our nature is a moral logic and often an inverse logic.” (“should you live for your résumé… or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i will be able to become my most authentic self by focusing on developing my morals and inner beliefs. i believe that establishing a faith-based framework will help guide me through these upcoming years of self discovery, and will develop my inner authentic self. the catholic presence at notre dame provides me with an opportunity to establish a strong faith in my life. reading some fellow students’ reflections on faith inspired me to work on strengthening my own, and the catholic resources here will be very helpful during this process. faith can bring hope during dark times, and a set of morals to guide people through tough decisions. “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god. god discloses himself, faith responds, and then we can see with new eyes.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). adhering to personal faith will help me search for a purpose and establish my internal strength. when forming connections with others, i believe that it is vital to ensure that the relationships are healthy and beneficial to both parties involved. having friends won’t bring a sense of connection and belonging if one side is constantly being controlled, ignored, and disrespected. “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often, we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i have not experienced a toxic relationship during my time here, but am willing to speak up for myself or for anyone else that is in a bad friendship situation. i believe that i can grow as a person by reflecting on my own stories. the journeys of individuals are shaped by experiences and stories, and provide a structure for personal growth. it’s important to “view every setback and disappointment as a lessona lesson that may be one of the most important things that you learn for that season in your life.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). although failures can be disheartening, they can be a significant learning experience that can create future successes. i have specifically been taking note of instances where i am unsuccessful in achieving a goal, and create strategies to achieve future goals. i believe that i am formed from my past experiences. every aspect of my life has been shaped in some way by people, places, and experiences. in addition, even small details can shape a person. for example, both prominent and small details are recalled in a certain poem regarding a person’s upbringing: “i'm from artemus and billie's branch, fried corn and strong coffee.” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). this poem reinforces the idea that everyone has a unique story about their lives that makes them different from everyone else, and that i should embrace all of the stories from my life, since they all define who i am. i believe that a community can be strengthened by pursuing truth. the human brain automatically forms biases and generalizations that can lead to stereotypes. these stereotypes are formed when people only know one characteristic about someone else’s life and are unaware about the other unique aspects that define their lives. “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar.” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). the truth can be distorted by biases, and in order to seek the truth, it is important to be aware of the unconscious biases that we may have. on campus, there are many opportunities to learn about different cultures and communities, and these experiences can eliminate misconceptions. by learning more about various groups of people, one can discover similarities that inspire close connections. overall, the reflections that i have done in moreau first year experience have allowed me to realize the ways in which i can pursue a fulfilling and successful college experience. by discovering and improving my inner self, as well as connecting with and learning more about others, i hope to lead a purposeful life at notre dame. week 13integration 2 professor pruitt moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 freshman year formation: encounters and experiences of emily i cannot believe the first semester of college is coming to an end in a matter of weeks. i think back to last year as i was applying to different schools and preparing to be where i am now and it makes me feel ancient. as i’ve been here i’ve encountered what my past self would have immediately labeled as failure. not exceeding expectations i’ve set for myself, or that i think other people have set for me, is something i’ve come to realize does not mean the end of the world. getting a b on a test instead of an a, or not completing all of my readings for world politics does not mean i’ve failed at life. week 9 i pulled from the article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” the importance of not living a life someone else wants you to live or else you will lose yourself trying to meet expectations for someone else (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week nine). while it is important to have goals, such as completing all of the readings ahead of schedule, i have learned i cannot let them consume me. it is not healthy to stick to that goal if it means neglecting other work, and not taking time to make sure i eat and get enough sleep. as someone who has previously based my worth on my ability to exceed expectations i have learned that if i continue this habit in college failure to meet/exceed them will negatively impact my mental health. as someone who is already far from home, religiously isolated, and dealing with a large amount of work and little sleep i cannot have something else putting my mental health at risk when it could be avoided. i have learned to be kind to myself in a way i did not know i desperately needed. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau while at notre dame my desire to be a part of a community that “strive[s] to overcome and eradicate all forms of discrimination, which are contrary to god’s intent” has grown immensly (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory? ” by christopher j. devronmoreau fye week ten). perhaps the lack of this in my greater community at home, a rather coservative sometimes racist environment, has made me desire a community such as notre dame even more. while on campus i believe i have found people who truly do want to “overcome and eradicate” discrimination. i see this regularly in the way people interact, and have treated me personally. now that i have experienced this community, it is not only important that every community i am part of shares these values, but essential for my own growth and mental health. in the article the issue of whether critical race theory should be taught is debated. one side argues it should not be taught in order to preserve community unity and the other is in favor of addressing the issue and increasing diversity. notre dame does not shy away from hard conversations, it may take them a while to deliberate, but the community is open to discussion which is extremely important. to be aware of your community’s needs you must first acknowledge them, and notre dame has done a solid job beginning to address some of the needs in problems relating to diversity on campus. while picking a school last fall it was important not only that i find an institution dedicated to service, but one willing to self evaluate and change. i saw that in notre dame. it was extremely important to me, especially after the previous year filled with protests and the rise in attention to blm, that i find an institution with strong core values. racism is and has been ingrained in higher education since its beginning, so finding an institution that was willing to acknowledge this and make changes was really important to me. during my time here i have realized i made the right choice, notre dame may not be perfect but it is dedicated to improving and treating others with dignity and respect. https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 during my time at notre dame as an out of state student i have learned a significant amount about myself, independence, and what it means to be isolated from a familiar community and family. i have always been independent, but love my huge family, and spending time with them, so moving so far away has been an adjustment for me. this quote from the text thirteen ways of looking at community has helped me learn an important lesson while i have been away from home. “ i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. the self-sufficiency i feel in success is a mirage. i need community—and, if [i] open my heart, i have it.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmermoreau fye week eleven). i have come to terms with the fact that i need a community. to be successful here means embracing the notre dame family since mine is so far away. since realizing this and being here i have opened myself up to my dorm community and have been welcomed with open arms. it is because of my self growth and the strength of this community that i am able to be successful and happy here on campus. though i am far away from my first support system i have found a new one that i get to develop and grow throughout my time here. my appreciation of different kinds of community has increased as a result of my notre dame journey. while at notre dame i have experienced utter hopelessness and yet the greatest of joy. during week twelve the discussion of hope was prominent. the text hopeholy cross and christian education discusses having hope in the educational process, and how we need to have enough hope to question and challenge our beliefs. though this may sound odd it is an important part of understanding self purpose in this life on earth and the next. (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. kingmoreau fye week). as i reflect on my time at notre dame i think of the many questions i’ve asked, and can’t help but wonder if i would have http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ asked the same things a year ago. the following questions have been essential in my formation as a notre dame student, and as a person. 1. how do i set expectations, and challenge myself, without allowing them to control me/ rule my entire self worth? how do i not give expectations too much power? 2. how do i make sure i am aware of the needs of my community while still acknowledging all of the concerns in the community 3. how do i use faith to actively guide my actions in my modern day to day life? 4. how does one lean into discomfort fully without fear of failure, and the feeling of needing to perfect, realistically in everyday life? 5. how do i positively contribute to other’s stories while on my own journey? 6. once i’ve forged life giving relationships how do i maintain them, ensuring that they do not develop into unhealthy or toxic relationships? 7. how do i use hope to understand my purpose? these questions have guided me through the first semester and have helped me come to know myself, which has allowed me to begin finding my place in the greater notre dame community. with the second semester on the horizon, and the next four years ahead of me, i am thankful for who i am, and excited about who i am becoming. pursuit of happiness what are you made for? what am i made for? it's a question that really gets me thinking. a question to which my answer has been reinvented in a sense after my visit to father hesburgs office in the library. prior to that visit, i believed that i had a pretty good answer. i was made to be great. made to be the change in my family. made to change the fortune of my mother. make her happy. a gift from god for her. however, as i walked around father hesburgs office with my headphones covering my ear, allowing me to totally immerse myself in his life i found something that i did not go in there searching for. an unwanted inspiration. i could not help but marvel at what a great life that father hesburg had. what marveled me was not his many many trophies, or his multiple crazy stories such as flying in the fastest plane. not his medal. not his desk. what amazed me was the impact he had on the world around him, not just those directly related to him. father hesburgh is dead. i do not know him personally. i've never heard much of him until that visit. but yet, his impact to the world was so grand that even through a mere documentary of his funeral i could almost feel his greatness. as i stood in that room, i began to go into a deep thought and realized that although his name is not as commonly known as people i idolize such as j.cole, or jay z, father hesburg was on an entirely different level then any who preceded him. i wanted-i want a life like that. a life of impact, a life of meaning. not just to my mom, or my little sister whom i love so dearly, but a life of meaning to god. father hesburg was a vessel that god could look at and be proud of because he thought about more than just himself. thought about further than just today, or tomorrow, or even next week. he dedicated his entire life to god and those around him, and that genuinely made him happy. when you die you can’t take the money with you, nor can you take the fame with you, but you can take the pure satisfaction that cleanses you. even on his deathbed, i am willing to bet that father hesburg was more happy than people alive and well in a mansion. a truly good life cannot be bought. i want to believe that that is what i was made to have. a truly good life, where i have an impact on the world around me is what i believe that i am made for, but what am i made of? during the weeks of my first semester here at notre dame, more specifically in correlation with my moreau class, i have been pushed to reflect a lot on myself and figure out the answer to that question. i learned in week 1 that i was made of vulnerability. i was made different from those around me and although at times that can be scary, i was made to embrace that. i was made to embrace my differences to those around me and use that as a learning point to grow and develop. in week 2, i learned that through my vulnerabilities and weaknesses, i can truly learn about myself. learn about what i truly believe in. everyone has different truths because everyone has different experiences. different goals. different end games. i identified my truth to be in god. my family's faith extended to me which enabled me to truly fall in love with and believe in god. this allowed for me to understand that i am made of grace. made of favor. a royal bloodline. because i am a child of god, i have all the tools required-the lever required to move the world. during week 11 i learned how to encounter communities. this week was especially important to me, and now that i am reflecting on it, it is especially important to me because i am pursuing a life as fulfilling as father hesburgs. he was a man that could move nations. this was because of his ability to truly connect with communities bigger than just himself. communities in which he had many differences with, differences that did not matter to him. he was able to look past all of that, not saying that those differences would have or should have affected his views of others, but he was able to understand that the only thing that really mattered was that the people in those communities were all men and women of god. that fact, and that fact alone was enough to build a bond that enabled people to travel thousands of miles just to see a man they did not know personally on his deathbed. now i'm only 18 and understand that i am still far from where i need to be. if it were easy, there would be many more like father hesburgh. it's not easy, and that's what makes it all the more rewarding when achieved. i know or i am aware of what i need to do to become a great man like father hesburgh, but still find it difficult to do these things. i still judge people who are different from me. i still allow what others say affect the way i view them and myself. i still am changing my end goal in college on a weekly basis. i understand that those things are not ideal but i also understand that i am human. those things are not ideal but they are natural feelings and behaviors that humans exhibit. now it is true that god made me to be imperfect but he also made me (and other humans) in his image. this means that although i am able to feel those negative feelings, i have to work hard to overcome them. i think that is one of the reasons that i found myself so fascinated by father hesburgh. despite being gifted all those things and earning all those medals, despite making all those powerful friends, despite all those great achievements, it was his work in god that he was most proud of and chose to identify as. he overcame greed, he overcame power and lust, and was truly happy. he was made to do god's work and that is what he did, and for that he is whom i wish to try and mirror. i was made for this world by god, and i am going to do my best to be of service to it. integration two benjamin loyd 1 december 2021 eric oswald moreau only god can judge me as i sit here in my study hall room surrounded by other athletes i ask myself the question what have i encountered and how have i responded to the negative side? my time at notre dame has been short, but also very long. i have been here for roughly 4 months by winter break, but mentally it feels like i have been here for a whole year. i have encountered virtually every feeling here. i know this is not one of the sources, but it plays through my head a lot especially in tough times. nipsey hussle once said “i went through every emotion with tryna pursue what i'm doing, you know what i mean? and i think what's gon' separate whoever's gon go for something, that you ain't gon' quit.” i realize more now than ever how much your past can affect your future. touching back on integration one and discussing how throughout highschool i was in a toxic relationship with someone that affected me in a huge way. no kid should have to deal with such mental trauma at that young of an age. then i think well people go through breakups all the time so maybe i should just toughen up and get over it, but that is just not true. everyone deals with things differently. especially since at that young of age i felt that it was something so special that i would do anything to make it work even if i sacrificed my own happiness. in “women find healing through kintsugi workshop”, one of the artists says, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” this reminds me of brene brown's speech about vulnerability. i was so heartbroken from the past relationships that it was affecting my new ones. i was bleeding on people who did not cut me. i am beginning to learn that it is a blessing to be able to feel all feelings because that is what makes life worth living. you cannot experience the highest of the highs without experiencing the lowest of the lows. coming here in august i was excited to say the least. i came here for about a month and a half in the summer and was happy here. i experienced feelings of anxiety and other mental health issues, but not to the degree where i was getting physically sick from those thoughts. right off the bat, i was hit with a wave of fear. a wave of expectations. a wave of pressure. i remember going to my mom’s hotel and sleeping for so long because my brain was just so tired from overthinking. this reminds me of a quote from julia hogan: it explains, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” this is exactly what i felt then and my whole life. the bar was always set so high that i was afraid that if it did not work out people would think differently about me. that i would be letting people down. i am working to realize now that i have to do what is best for me and my family and what makes me happy. to try and control the uncontrollable will lead to headaches and stress that is not needed. that saturday night, the annual domer fest was occurring and i just did not know if i could go because of how anxious i was. i had enough courage and fortunately made it to it. i had a sense of deja vu because it reminded me of a church camp i went to going into seventh grade. that camp was really the first time i experienced anxiety. i remember it like it was yesterday. the sleepless and sweaty nights. the stomach pains. home sickness. everything. all at the age of twelve. right after this week, i emailed the gld center to get some help for my mental health. there is when i set up an appointment with joey ramaeker. none of my coaches or teammates really know that i function a little anxious at times and see a sports psychologist because there is nothing they can do about it. this battle is me versus me. so this is the part of the question: how will i respond. sitting and talking about what you are going through can help tremendously. we went through all of my past experiences both good and bad. we broke down why i feel all of these symptoms ultimately because my body is going into fight or flight mode. i get so worked up that my adrenaline starts going and i get all worked up and then want to get the heck out of that place. we talk about how anxiety is a normal feeling and that we need to be curious and accept it because when we try to fight it is when it just gets worse. our brains as humans naturally like to over analyze one thing to make it into another thing. we think about one problem then think about another problem and another and another which drives us crazy and just leads to more stress. we as people need to be patient with ourselves and learn to un-judge ourselves at times because we are all doing the best we can. this reminds me of the topic of hope. in “holy cross and christian education” father moreau writes, “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse, no humiliation he cannot exchange for blessing, no anger he cannot dissolve, no routine he cannot transfigure. all is swallowed up in victory. he has nothing but gifts to offer. it remains only for us to find how even the cross can be borne as a gift.” in those times that i am battling inner demons and the devil is trying to control my thoughts i need to be reminded of god’s presence and that he is not ashamed of me for feeling this way and that there is no need to worry because everything will work out in his plan. ryan jefferson, a 16 year-old baseball player from providence catholic highschool took his own life on november 10th, 2021. he played for one of my rivaling travel baseball programs and even though i never knew the kid it makes me heartbroken. mental health matters!! to the eye this man was a stud. committed to play baseball at the university of illinois urbana champaign, ranked 4th by prep baseball report in the state of illinois, has a girlfriend, most likely a very popular person at his highschool and in his area. no one knew about the battles he fought mentally. whether dealing with anxiety, or depression, or other mental health issues. they just saw him go out there and do his thing on the field. he probably felt like he had no one to go to, or no one would understand. he may have thought he was so far gone that no one could save him. he was fighting his own demons. i wish he would have asked for help. i wish someone would have told him that these feelings don’t define who you are. that it is okay to not be okay. that jesus is with you at your lowest moments. he was a leader. in “thirteen ways of looking at community” states “...we create and maintain institutional arrangements that protect leaders from suffering by assuming the worst of followers and encouraging leaders to dominate them by means of power.” i feel that society sometimes pushes the narrative that men are tough and men do not need help, but this is just not true. us as athletes, men, and people need to speak up when we are faced with mental blockage. everybody’s experience is different, but finding someone to talk to is so important. you are never alone. i pray we all find healing from the things we do not talk about. god bless. #rj3 also, the title from my first integration and second integration are tattooed on my arms so i felt it would be unique to put them as titles for my integrations. (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten) (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king moreau fye week twelve) integration paper 2 moreau integration paper 2 encountering the future. in the past few months, i have come to see many of my realities differently. things that once made me weak now stand as the source of my strength. situations that made me feel strong now make me anxious. i thought life was changing, but being in this course, i realized everything is the same, and i am the one who is changing. i view life as a book: a collection of chapters that build and tear down suspense, creating a unique story for the reader. my life just so happens to be a book that encompasses many genres and being at notre dame, and in this course, i finally learned how to control the narrative of my story. at notre dame, the moreau first year experience focuses on shaping individuals to look at themselves and the world. it aims to make us question the things we believe in, evaluate the realities we accept, and understand the potential we all possess. this past semester has awarded me numerous experiences that add to my story. these experiences have made me question my beliefs, confirm my viewpoints, and become aware of the inevitability of imperfection. these past four weeks especially have taught me to look at everything in black and white before adding color to the picture. one of the lessons i have learned is the importance of knowing your worth. every day, i encounter some of the most brilliant minds. i sit in a classroom ranging from thirty to eighty students, all of which have such strengths that both impress and intimidate me. imposter syndrome is not uncommon to me, but being at an institution like notre dame, the feeling has only intensified. elizabeth cox’s ted talk on overcoming imposter syndrome resonated with me. (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox-moreau fye week nine). she highlights the universality of imposter syndrome and how even the most influential people experience it. although i have encountered imposter syndrome on numerous occasions, i now look to prayer and spiritual practice to remind myself of god’s perfect plan for me. i also plan to surround myself with people who relieve the pressure i put on myself by being supportive and encouraging. like imposter syndrome, we as humans relate to the encounter of brokenness. the idea of brokenness is often stigmatized. our society prides itself on perfection and searches for it in every aspect of life. i once did the same. however, when i experience times where i feel broken, i remember the kintsugi workshop set up by kristen helgeson. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop '' by grotto – moreau fye week ten). this workshop puts back pieces of broken ceramics with gold. this practice is symbolic for representing the beauty that comes with brokenness. i have learned to heal from brokenness and find beauty in imperfection. i also learned that something broken does not have to stay broken. our society, for instance, has https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ become cracked in so many ways, and the opportunities offered at notre dame are the parts of gold that i believe can help reform the structure of our society. prejudice, racism, classismprevalent, potent, and damaging. based on the numerous incidences of racial injustice that happened throughout the past years, specifically the murder of george floyd in 2020, it is clear to see just how ingrained racism is in our society and how we as a nation have not been doing much to combat it. fr jenkins mentioned in his wesley theological seminary commencement address that “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future." (“wesley theological seminary 2021 commencement address'' by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). we have been parading in a constant cycle of prejudice and never seem to find a way to evolve out of it. as christians, we are called to love one another; that is our greatest commandment. we must not only avoid partaking in these prejudices but also must reject them and create a space that is absent of hate. going forward, i must remain aware that i have privileges that many people do not and that i have a voice that can help bring out someone else’s. i aim to do this by remaining educated in the current issues of our society while also educating others to be self-aware. within the past semester, i have encountered people from various parts of the world who have brought their own stories and traditions to campus. from my interactions with them and being an international student myself, i appreciate and encourage the diversity that enriches our community with tremendous beauty and history. with such differences comes ignorance, and i have come across many people who still do not appreciate the beauty in individuality. the material for week ten highlights professor agustin fuentes, who spoke of how race and racism are malleable, making it something that deserves our attention. (“diversity matters! by professor agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven). learning from his analysis, to strengthen my bonds with all people, i must stay aware and dismantle the implicit bias i notice in myself and others. the most fundamental lesson i have learned this semester is to hope. i have encountered my share of tribulations, from being away from family to financial difficulties and even physical and academic insecurities. i have faced but also overcome hopelessness, and it links back to the continuous integration of catholicism at notre dame. the image of christ on the cross stands as a constant reminder to have hope in the lord and to allow him to guide my path. his victory over death gives me the courage to hope for victory over my crosses. in the holy cross and christian education booklet, blessed basil moreau depicts the fundamentality of hope and how it can drive someone to do great things. (“holy cross and christian education” pg. 14-16 by notre dame campus ministry – moreau fye week twelve.) today the congregation of holy cross stands firm because of a man who hoped for christian formation, inspiring generations of religious people, leading down to fr. sorin, who founded our university. their courage encourages me to keep my mind focused on the possibilities of a better tomorrow and to trust in a god who loves me and his plans for me. my encounters have added to the chapters of my story. i have come to terms with my past, i live my present, and i look towards a future that can help make a change. i want to use my https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ experiences to change the trajectory of our society and to become the gold that helps mend the cracks in its pottery. i hope to continue representing and celebrating minorities. i hope to continue advocating for inclusivity by doing my part to educate others and staying educated myself. blessed basil moreau hoped for the same things, and this course has given me the tools to identify what i need to do to center my future around fulfilling those hopes. bibliography: “what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox-moreau fye week nine “woman find healing through kintsugi workshop '' by grotto – moreau fye week ten “wesley theological seminary 2021 commencement address'' by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c – moreau fye week ten “diversity matters! by professor agustin fuentes – moreau fye week eleven. “holy cross and christian education” pg. 14-16 by notre dame campus ministry – moreau fye week twelve. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration 1 moreau fye integration one my developing core beliefs this semester in moreau we seemed to discuss a lot about different things that can define and shape a person. while i did not learn anything about myself per se, i learned new ways to articulate truths about myself and society that i believe. i also learned a lot about how other people think based on what my moreau classmates said. these classes have helped me identify some root beliefs of mine: i believe that i am made for community, i believe that i grow by diving deeper in this community, and i believe that i am responsible for bettering this community. my first root belief is that i am made for community. a source from week four that stuck out to me particularly was a chart which lists several attributes of a healthy relationship, one of which is respect. the description of respect is, “partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other’s opinions, friends, and interests. they listen to each other” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). in my first two months at notre dame i have been seeking out opportunities to befriend people and grow in community. i have found that respecting people helps me be who i want to be in friendships, namely a person who cares about what the other thinks and who wants to help them. giving a peer respect also elicits respect from them. developing this mutual respect has helped me grow in this community that i believe i was made for. my time at notre dame has also strengthened my belief that growing in communion with god is the best way to become fully alive. an article about faith states, “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it. spiritual life alters the cockeyed lighting that makes us the center of the universe” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). i believe that i was made to be in community with both the creator and his created, and that through this true fulfillment is found. as fagerberg implies, making ourselves the center of the universe is a mindset that needs conversion. i have found that in my own life, especially at notre dame, when i dedicate https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau time to growing in communion with god rather than living every second of my day for myself i see the world in a more authentic, upbuilding way. the where i’m from module caused me to consider my history of community in light of what i want to develop here. the where i’m from website emphasizes that “no one else sees the world as you do,” so we should take time to formulate and think about how we see the world (“where i’m from'' by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). while this does not explicitly relate to building community, pondering how i see the world to write that poem made me reflect on the fact that i desire deeper friendships. my friendships in highschool were alright but not always upbuilding or sincere; here, i desire to have people who i can trust more and get along better with. in my time at notre dame, i desire to create deeper relationships with people compared to what i had in high school, so i plan to try harder to be a friend and make friends. my second root belief is that i grow by diving deeper in community with others. i have found that a big component of diving deeper in this sense is willing to be vulnerable. for example, in my second week at notre dame i was in a dorm with a few other guys and girls, and we went around answering somewhat deep questions from some cards. willing to be vulnerable in this setting helped us all to get to know eachother better, and now, about a month later, we are all better friends. in a ted talk in the week one’s module, the speaker proposed that “[vulnerability] is the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love” (“the power of vulnerability'' by brené brown moreau fye week one). while i don't believe that vulnerability is the only source of joy and love, i do believe that it can greatly foster these and help one dive deeper in community, as it has for me. i believe that another technique to grow closer to people in community is learning others’ stories. in week five’s module, a holy cross priest mentioned that each person’s story matters, and that we need to learn from these stories (“two notre dames: your holy cross education'' by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). i believe that listening to other people’s stories can also be very informative, as each person has a unique perspective on life. listening to friends’ stories and experiences specifically can help us to get to know them better and form closer, deeper relationships with them. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 my last root belief is that i am responsible for bettering the communities of which i am a part of. i think that this is done primarily by living a lifestyle that first builds up others rather than oneself. i have seen many people in the notre dame community living this way, and it seems to do a great job of bettering the community. in a ted talk in week two’s module, the speaker discusses two mindsets, one of striving for worldly success and one of striving for morality and interior wholeness, and concludes that living this second way is the overall better way to live (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?'' by david brooks moreau fye week two). both the outward mindsets harbored by many members in the notre dame community and brooks’ beliefs have helped me to better understand why living a lifestyle that builds others up is much better than living solely for oneself, and have caused me to want to grow in this area. week seven’s content discusses building up community in the context of a nation: “if a country can’t tell narratives in which everybody finds an honorable place, then righteous rage will drive people toward tribal narratives that tear it apart” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week seven). i believe that in order for a community to thrive, all of its members must be included and built up. i have seen the reverse happen here, where people in groups gossip about other members of that group, and eventually it creates unnecessary strain and dissension within groups. ensuring that each member is respected is key to fostering good relationships. in the first semester in moreau and other experiences, i have learned more about what it means to be in a community and to build that community up. in the remaining time of this semester, i look forward to growing in my three root beliefs that i am made for community, that i grow by diving deeper in this community, and that i am responsible for bettering this community. by developing deeper relationships with people and refusing to do unnecessary things that would weaken these relationships, i believe that i will continue to find more fulfillment and will thrive more here at notre dame. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare integration integrative assignment finding my passions and vocation the hard way i believe that i am meant to help those with mental illnesses. up until last year, my life was perfect. i have always suffered with severe ocd, but school had made me distracted enough that it did not have an impact on my life. however, once the pandemic occurred, my life, for lack of a better term, went to shit. my brother developed severe ocd, and my best friend’s mother went manic and had to be forcefully hospitalized when she was violent towards my best friend and her father. only a week after she got out of the hospital, my best friend’s father committed suicide. less than a month later than that, one of my best teammates died in a tragic car accident. throughout this extremely traumatic time period, i changed as a person not in my personality, but what i see as my passions or my vocation. a lot of the traumatic events, while occurring to me, more affected those i was close to. this gave me a sense of purpose; i learned how best to be there with my grieving best friend, and learned the symptoms of mania to be able to predict when her mom would become manic again. while this may seem overwhelming, i knew this is what i had to do to be there for my friend. currently, her mom is back in the hospital and refusing treatment, so i am heading down to see my best friend over fall break. we speak every day for hours and i do everything i can to help her including reaching out for help where i see necessary. because of these recent experiences, i’ve discovered that i want to be a psychiatrist that works specifically on mental disorders such as bipolar depression, suicidal patients, and others. i think that mental illnesses have not been fully destigmatized specifically those that are not just general anxiety, and i want to work to help normalize these. if my best friend’s dad would have become more aware of his own ocd through acceptance and therapy, then maybe there could have been a way for him to get help. i think that one of the first activities we completed in the module the test about our core strengths helped me feel more confident about psychiatry being a suitable and fulfilling career because my primary strength is social intelligence. i believe that i form the best relationships by a mutual respect that comes with just listening. especially in a new environment without knowing anyone, i have found the best way to get to know someone is to just listen. i think that the text “healthy vs. unhealthy relationships,” really cemented this belief; as it reiterated how important listening is as it demonstrates a mutual respect towards each person in a relationship. i believe that is vital to understand all perspectives and opinions. this has been a highly influential value of mine because i am from a politically divided family. specifically, my grandmother, who i have a very close relationship with, and the rest of my family, differ in almost every political value. however, rather than distancing myself from my grandmother, i instead have developed an extremely close relationship with her. despite our differences, we have a mutual respect for each other that isn’t shared between her and every other family member. because i respect her views and she is then able to respect mine, i am able to get through to her when other family members aren't. however, i think i am blessed in a lot of ways because i resonate with both political spectrums due to my family. as david brooks says, “the real problem is in our system of producing shared stories.” i think that i am blessed to “share stories” with a plethora of views because i have been exposed to them and learned how to appreciate each one throughout my childhood. i believe that the best version of myself is my authentic self. for the majority of middle and high school, i was unhappy because i could not be the person i so desperately wanted to become. that is an outgoing, popular, party girl. i would go to every party with a group of girls i could not relate to and were entirely surface level, and i could not understand why i was so miserable. around sophomore year, my life took a turn for the better. i started doing really well on track, and i made a group of friends that enjoyed school and thrift shopping as much as i did. having those new aspects to my life really boosted my self confidence and i have never felt the same insecurities since. as brown says, the people that are the most wholehearted are the people who “believe they’re worthy.” i feel like it's taken a long time for me to realize i am worthy, but since then, i have developed the most meaningful and deepest connections in my entire life. now, i feel confident expressing my ocd, my interests, and my passions. in terms of faith, personally, i believe in spirituality and personal devotion to god rather than organized religion. i fully believe in god, but i believe i have been negatively turned away by attending a catholic elementary school and from my church in my hometown. for some reason, the views expressed by the priests and the parishioners were not what i believe epitomized a “loving catholic”, and for this reason my family and i became alienated from the church in my hometown. i believe that being christian means that you hold no judgment towards others, but in some apsetcs, such as gay marriage and abortion, the church does just that. i think that this is best demonstrated by the father groves quote, “we cannot love the god who we do not see, if we can’t love the brother we do see.” there is a lot of hate in this current world, and sadly, a lot of the hate is perpetrated by some (and for clarification definitely not all!) catholics including members of my family. i hope one day to return to a church, or maybe find a sect of christianity more accepting of my views, but for now, i am maintaining a personal relationship with god through prayer. as father pete says, i need to “resist the temptation to compare against what others profess to know and believe” because my faith journey should be unique to my experiences. having a relationship with god has kept me grounded the past year through all the trauma i’ve endured. rather than question his existence because of the sadness i’ve seen, i have found myself leaning more and more on his support and unconditional love. finally, i believe that i have been blessed with a beautiful life full of strong connections and wonderful support systems. when i was writing my “where i’m from” poem, i talked a bit about the happy memories my family and i have formed, but in this reflection i want to end by reiterating them. my parents and siblings were a formative part of my life because their humor and interests have given me happy memories. i truly feel as though i am the luckiest person to have an amazing extended family and an accepting and supportive group of friends and i am eternally grateful for all they have given me. integration 2 bossone 1 megan leis moreau 3 november 2021 a journey towards bettering myself sitting down and writing this integration comes at a shock to me; i simply cannot believe that an entire semester has already passed. to quote one of my favorite books, a tale of two cities: “it was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair” (dickens). this quote is a great representation of my first semester here at notre dame. there was darkness and light, hope and despair, knowledge gained and mistakes made. i’ve always been told that college is a time to grow and even within 13 short weeks, this moreau class has forced me to think a lot about what i value in life. in the past four weeks, i have developed the following beliefs: 1. i believe that the expectations i set for myself should be fair and based on my own judgment. 2. i believe that i must experience brokenness in order to become my best self. 3. i believe that listening to other perspectives will facilitate forming my own world views. 4. i believe that growing means learning how to maintain hope even in my darkest times. our ninth week of class was titled “encountering dissonance,” and we sought to answer the question: “how do i respond to external and internal dissonance?” we talked bossone 2 about the infamous imposter syndrome that i’ve heard mentioned many times in relation to notre dame students. i have always had high expectations for myself in everything i do, from school to sports to something even as mundane as baking. i always degrade myself when i fail or do something wrong, because it is proof that i have not lived up to my inner perfectionist’s expectations. while much of this is self-inflicted, i have also felt pressure from those around me. my mom has always been supportive of me but unfortunately my dad is not the same. if i didn’t get an a in a class, i was always met with the disappointing sigh of my father. so not only did i have to battle my own expectations, but i also had to put a wall up so that i didn’t let my father’s expectations dig me deeper in my own hole of perfectionism. through years of emotional abuse, this wall has grown, and grown, and grown. i told myself that i would begin chipping away at this wall once i was away from the person from whom this wall protected me, and i’m happy to say i lived up to my promise to myself. now that i am alone at college, i can begin to make my own decisions and form my own expectations for myself that aren’t based on the expectations of my dad. this led me to my new-found belief: i believe that the expectations i set for myself should be fair and based on my own judgment. i think julia hogan explains it perfectly in her article titled “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit: “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (hogan). and now that i am adjusted to life away from home, i am finally ready to start living my own life, based solely on my own terms. our tenth week of class was titled “encountering brokenness,” and we sought to answer the question: “what are the central challenges of my community and how do i respond?” brokenness is a struggle for everybody and can be encountered at nearly any and every stage in someone’s life. my favorite part of the moreau curriculum from this whole year came during this week, and it was the video that we watched on kintsugi, which is a japanese artform in which pottery is broken, mended back together, and then the cracks are painted with gold. as this was a new concept to me, i did a little more research, discovering that the philosophy behind kintsugi is described as “highlighting or bossone 3 emphasizing imperfections, visualizing mends and seams as an additive or an area to celebrate or focus on” (wikipedia). in this concept, brokenness is seen as something beautiful; being able to recognize one’s own cracks and seams from a previous break is empowering. this discovery led to my next belief: i believe that i must experience brokenness in order to become my best self. brokenness is inevitable. while i could experience heartbreak or disappointment and allow it to mentally drag me down, i would rather acknowledge my experiences and appreciate them for making me stronger. this recognition and appreciation will help me lead a life of strength and goodness. our eleventh week was titled “encountering community,” and we sought to answer the question: how do i strengthen bonds of interconnection with others, especially in the midst of conflict or dissimilarity? coming from scottsdale, arizona, i grew up in a very predominantly white neighborhood. had i only sought to listen to the experiences of my hometown community, my world views would have been completely different. because there is little diversity in race, nationality, and sexual orientation, my world views would’ve reflected that, and likely would’ve upheld the belief of white supremacy that is systemically prevalent in our country. but luckily, i sought to form my beliefs using the voices that i didn’t hear in my immediate community: black voices, asian voices, hispanic voices, gay voices, transgender voices, etc. how could i form a worldview without considering the amount of diversity present in said world? this helped me form my belief: i believe that listening to other perspectives will facilitate forming my own world views. this also applies to notre dame. even though notre dame is not nearly the most diverse university in the country, i still see more minorities here than i did in my hometown. and while i tried to diversify my friends at home, it is much easier to do so when you live within a more diverse community to begin with. this week also reassured me of my choice of major: american studies. as prof. agustin fuentes states in the video “diversity matters,” “understanding the landscape of the united states is absolutely central to understanding who we are as students, who we are as scholars, who we are as members of the notre dame community” (fuentes). i’m excited to further pursue american studies bossone 4 and study the stories of marginalized people in order to not only become a better notre dame student but also to become a better person. our twelfth week was titled “encountering hope,” and we sought to answer the question: “how do i live and grow in hope?” to put it simply, hope and i have had a complicated relationship. without getting too deep into the world of problems that my parents have faced, my mom always had hope when it came to my relationship with my dad. she kept hope that it would improve and that he would be able to change. through this experience, i began to view having hope as a dangerously optimistic way to make excuses for the problems i was facing. i saw it as a symbol of weakness, but that could not have been further from the truth. fr. james b. king c.s.c. stated that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (king). to connect this quote to the idea of hope, hope is born from adversity; it would hardly exist without it. as i grew more, and faced more adversity, i came to the following belief: i believe that growing means learning how to maintain hope even in my darkest times. rather than viewing hope as a weakness, i should use it as a strength when tackling my problems. and i intend to take this advice with me not only through my time at notre dame but also through my entire life. an extra note: thank you for everything, megan. it was such a pleasure being in your class this semester; you are genuinely one of the kindest souls i have met here. i hope everything goes well with the new baby, and i hope you have a restful break with your family. happy holidays! bossone 5 works cited week nine: julia hogan “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?u tm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau week ten: “ women find healing through kintsugi workshop” https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_ source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau week eleven: professor agustin fuentes “diversity matters” https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-4 4ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 week twelve: fr. james b. king c.s.c. “holy cross and christian education” https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ dickens, charles. a tale of two cities. penguin classics. 2012. kintsugi wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/kintsugi https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/kintsugi 10-12-2021 beliefs: the music of personality i believe that when people hide something, they are doing this because it is personal. with this belief, i feel it is easy to respect people who are less vulnerable or do not volunteer. for example, in my moreau class most people may feel their response to a week’s homework is personal. of course, this is just an assumption, but an assumption that can keep you from labeling someone as lazy or unresponsive to the class. still, you can also think that a person is shy or may feel too tired, stressed, or sad, leading them to not volunteer. brené brown describes this vulnerability as something that can be comfortable, excruciating, or in between (“the power of vulnerability” moreau fye week one). another example i could bring up is talking about my house life. i feel some details are too personal to tell many of the people here, yet, since i only just met my new friends and peers. i believe that my hidden qualities are just as important as my unhidden ones. for example, i feel telling the truth is very important even if i can just lie. however, this measure of truth can be seen by a few others and me, but not by most of the people i have met. in “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?,” david brooks explains this quality as deeper in our being which is seen within a eulogy, while are unhidden qualities are open and seen in our resumés (moreau fye week two). even though he talks of this being deeper, i would say our unhidden qualities are still important to who we are. it is the sections of your resumé that asks for your differences to others, as well as your personality, reasoning for doing something, and more. at notre dame, i feel it is important to be nice to others, that is an example of something that is less hidden. at the same time, i try to be truthful about my true personality and if i need help with homework or not or being true to myself by not doing things because of peer pressure. i believe that religions enable us to keep going. my thought is that the world follows god to respect his power and to see the great world of heaven and ‘the end’. also, with god as a part of your reasoning, the meaning of life becomes clear. as seen in “faith brings light to a dark world,” happiness and hope are generated from this following, allowing for beauty to be seen in this world created by him (professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). even though i do not believe in a religion myself (i consider myself muslim, but do not believe in allah), i think that the community and following is wholesome. for example, the reason i go to mass is the peacefulness i feel, and to see the community that i am in. i then give respect to religions and can see similarities to the pleasant community i saw when i visited a mosque back at home. i believe that friends can become your sisters and brothers. what i mean by this, is that a lot of my friends back at home are so trustworthy that i could trust them with as much as my own brother or family. most friendships should make you feel “like you’re investing in something long-term" (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). what i get from this is the fact that a lot of great friendships may lead to you knowing more about them and them knowing more about you. at notre dame, i can feel the start of these relationships, particularly in my calc. one class. the main reason why is that i feel happy to see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ them every day i go to the class and have very pleasant conversations. from the observation of what i believe, i feel that college life will truly lead to me gaining friends throughout my life. i believe that all humans make mistakes but get back up with valuable experience. as stated in carla harris’ speech, this will enable you to do better; because of setbacks, you will learn lessons that will improve your future (“2021 laetare medalist address” moreau fye week five). in my limited college experience, i can see these lessons toward responsibility. i completed a long essay for anthropology and only realized after doing it that it is easier than i was expecting. i just needed to stay focused, so to allow myself to assess the difficulty and find a plan of action for completing the assignment. from this, i will start projects and essays early on, or at least skim through the directions and expectations, to realize the difficulty. i believe that the people around you have shaped you. for my poem, i focused on my family shaping me because they have had a big impact. at the same time, i feel my friends, peers, and teachers have done something similar, even if it is only at a smaller scale. still, the assignment of week six might have requested to do more on location and culture, but i realized while making the poem and even before this in high school that my true origins are my family. my poem was my more authentic self. to make it properly, you have to “learn to let it lead you” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). with this, i was able to appreciate my family more, or even the many peers i will meet in college that may shape me into a new person. i believe that everyone should be given a chance no matter what their stereotype. this stereotype may be negative toward many individuals, especially toward black americans, immigrants, and many other types of groups. however, implicit bias should be stopped and hindered. implicit bias only leads to unnatural paranoia and even friendships. “it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice,” (“how to think about 'implicit bias” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven) but the first step in eliminating hate because of stereotypes is by realizing this first. many examples could easily be how a lot of students here are white, and my old school was primarily minority. i need to realize that the stereotypes towards white individuals, especially the negative ones like some being racist and overprivileged, is dangerous to think of. luckily, all the people i have met, no matter their race, have been positive and welcoming. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ integration ii patrick mckenzie moreau first year experience integration two 12/3/21 dropping expectations to pick up yourself i have encountered many diverse people, experiences, and beliefs. i have encountered new friends, hobbies, and opportunities. the most important questions i have asked myself this year are: who do i want to be? how do i become that person? how do i balance school and social life? and finally, what do i truly want to get out of my four years at notre dame? the answer to the first question is still meddling in my mind, but i have a general idea. i want to inspire, to elevate, to be a force for good in the world. the more challenging question is how. how do i positively impact others so they will continue to pass the positive energy? how do i let myself be vulnerable to be the person i want to be? julia hogan explains that with students, “none of them tell me that they believe they are living a fulfilling life when they let their self-worth be defined by these external expectations” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i feel under the same pressure and external expectations. i have two people i feel like i need to become. one that is the stereotypical college student and enjoys going out, partying, being free from any parental restrictions without any responsibility. i feel great imposter syndrome because i don’t feel like i belong if i do not participate in the “fun” activities (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). the other one is my vision for myself. the person who i want to be. i don’t find joy or fun in ways that many others do. when i let go of my expectations, i can live a personally fulfilling life without letting outside pressures dictate my self-worth and personal https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo dignity. there are consequences from living a personally fulfilling life, one being i have a lot of “orbiting friends” ("advice from a formerly lonely college student “ by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). i try my best to balance personal expectations along with knowing i won’t be perfect but i know i must try my best. i know many of my “orbiting” friends’ values do not align with mine and i believe that is okay. fr. jenkins said, “at a time of expanding diversity of people and moral opinions — when we need more skill and wisdom in engaging those with other views — we seem to be less skillful, less wise” (“wesley theological seminary 2021 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten) to emphasize the need for humanity to recognize personal values might not always align, but that does not mean conflict must ensue. similar to the women who found healing through the kintsugi workshop (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten), i have encountered healing through rebuilding myself after i feel broken. the sense of healing can only be found once you acknowledge what has happened and reflect upon yourself. to reflect, one must take into consideration all sides of the issue whether you agree with them or not. by bridging this gap, you are becoming more empathetic and able to converse with a diverse group of people with diverse values. the conversation about critical race theory (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devron moreau fye week ten) has good intentions on both sides. there are truths on both sides. i have encountered teachers who avoided taking public sides by stating “i don’t teach critical race theory” but rather “i teach history” to avoid controversy. this is the way everyone answers questions these days because no one wants to offend/disagree with anyone's perspective. after all, we cannot have informed, educated conversations without https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html http://du/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 conflict. i used to think there was clarity that educated individuals can have a conversation without conflict as a result, but that is not the case. no one wants to have tough conversations. on the other hand, i have encountered a welcoming community at both notre dame and holy cross. i enjoy the small, tight-knit community of holy cross while simultaneously enjoying the energetic atmosphere of notre dame. parker palmer explains, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven) to explain the true meaning of community. one should not be looking to achieve community, but to receive the gift of a welcoming, respectful, and caring community. one does not set out to build a community, but rather to embrace the sense of community that is offered. to receive the gift of community, one must be internally vulnerable to accept everyone and must be willing to make themselves vulnerable to be accepted. i have encountered a gift of two spectacular and amazing communities that i have opened my heart to embrace. the diversity of both communities enables many voices, backgrounds, values, and points of view to take shape. professor agustin fuentes’s video (“diversity matters” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven) emphasizes the need for awareness of implicit bias in a community. within the notre dame community, i have encountered the klau center archive on race which records notre dame community members' experiences with implicit bias (“with voices true snapchat summary” by klau center archives on race moreau fye week eleven). so far, through my notre dame experience, i have encountered a community that will embrace me as long as i embrace the community. i have encountered ways to grow in hope as a progress through the years. i hope to become a more complete person. blessed basil moreau wrote “[education] is the art of helping young people to completeness” (“hopeholy cross and christian education” by fr. james king http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ moreau fye week twelve) to decipher the true meaning of education. education will transform pupils into more complete people. basil moreau continued his philosophy by stating, “the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart” to set the foundation that the heart must come first. a pupil must commit themselves first with their heart, and then their mind will follow. i have encountered a difficult time distinguishing the difference between “belief” and “hope”. i understand “hope” is more of a passive action while “belief” is more active and controllable. in the “screwtape letters”, screwtape letter, it is stated that, “you have great hopes that the patient’s religious phase is dying away?” (“the screwtape letters: chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). however, “great hope” does not mean it is certain. c.s. lewis reminds us, “readers are advised to remember that the devil is a liar. not everything screwtape says should be assumed to be true even from his angle” (“a brief introduction to the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve) to question the statement of the devil itself, therefore there is still hope that the apparent victim still has their religious phase. at notre dame, i have encountered a hope to be a better version of myself and the belief that it can be accomplished. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189595?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189478?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189478?wrap=1 integration 2 7\ohu�0duwlqr ,qwhjudwlrq�� 0ruhdx ������� (qfrxqwhulqj�0hdqlqjixo�5hodwlrqvklsv�lq�d�7lph�ri�6ljqlilfdqw�3huvrqdo�*urzwk 7kh�wudqvlwlrq�wr�froohjh�kdv�eurxjkw�d�vohz�ri�qhz�h[shulhqfhv��vrph�srvlwlyh�dqg�vrph qhjdwlyh��exw�doo�lqioxhqwldo�lq�p\�ghyhorsphqw�dv�d�shuvrq��2xw�ri�doo�wkdw�,�kdyh�hqfrxqwhuhg wklv�vhphvwhu��,�kdyh�vhhq�d�qrwlfhdeoh�vkliw�lq�p\�shuvrqdo�sulrulwlhv�dqg�jrdov��prvw�qrwdeo\ uhjduglqj�shuvrqdo�uhodwlrqvklsv��$v�,�kdyh�vwduwhg�wr�ohduq�p\�vfkhgxoh�dqg�ehfrph�frpiruwdeoh lq�froohjh�olih��wkh�ydoxh�ri�d�vwurqj�uhodwlrqvkls�kdv�ehfrph�dexqgdqwo\�fohdu��7kh�ehjlqqlqj�ri wkh�vhphvwhu�zdv�fkdoohqjlqj�erwk�dfdghplfdoo\�dqg�vrfldoo\�dv�,�vwuxjjohg�wr�dgmxvw�wr�wkh uljrurxv�zrunordg�dv�zhoo�dv�exlog�p\�qhz�iulhqgvkls�qhwzrun�iurp�vfudwfk��,q�wkh�vhfrqg�kdoi 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uhodwlrqvklsv�\rx�irup�zlwk�iulhqgv��idplo\��dqg�hyhq�\rxuvhoi�duh�gluhfwo\�wlhg�wr�\rxu�kdsslqhvv dqg�vhqvh�ri�ixoiloophqw��7kh�sxuvxlw�ri�olih�jlylqj�uhodwlrqvklsv�lv�rqh�wkdw�,�zloo�frqwlqxh�wr sxuvxh��dqg�zlwk�wkh�nqrzohgjh�dqg�h[shulhqfhv�wkdw�,�kdyh�jdlqhg�wklv�vhphvwhu�,�zloo�eh�ehwwhu htxlsshg�wr�gr�mxvw�wkdw� akerman professor taylor kelly moreau 15 october, 2021 strong and true: a series of formation root belief #1: i believe that vulnerability is authenticity, and that is beauty. in the past i have trained myself, if you will, to be strong and bold on the outside so that no one could ever see my inner weaknesses or even my emotions. i have realized the fact that i need to change this idea and have been working on doing so since i got here, to notre dame, by interacting with new people on a daily basis, exploring new things, and portraying myself in an open and truthful way. in her speech, dr. brown mentioned how if you are afraid to discuss shame, the more shame you have, and that sentence spoke volumes to me (“the power of vulnerability” brene brown moreau fye week one). the talk helped me realize how much work i have to do on myself so that the people around me can see who i am from the start of a relationship rather than later into the friendship. this goes in accordance with what is so special about the notre dame community. the people create such a strong, unbreakable connection because everyone is so willing to be authentic and willing to listen to others and their stories. “what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” brene brown moreau fye week one). this quote, spoken by dr. brown, concisely explains the importance of understanding that letting your guard down and allowing yourself to be seen is not shameful, but authentic and true. i feel that today, in this day and age with such a large focus on social media and personal reputation, it is difficult to let your guard down with such a big audience. it is difficult to understand and accept your flaws, let alone show them off to the world, but as dr. brown expresses, specifically in this quote, that is what makes someone unique and vulnerable, which is a good thing. when we took the character survey in class, i saw that the strengths and weaknesses matched what i had trained myself to be like, judgemental-thinking about every possible consequence, and my biggest weakness was love, which entails great vulnerability. here at notre dame, i have been inspired by the vulnerability and authenticity of others, which has therefore encouraged me to be more proud of the things that make me different and to be fully aware of who i am so that no one can alter those qualities. david brooks spoke the words, “in order to find yourself you have to lose yourself” and that resonated with me because i believe that on my path to becoming more vulnerable this school year, i let myself go to an extent that everyone knew everything about me and my personality because i intentionally let it show (“should you live for your resume of your eulogy?” david brooks moreau fye week two). after this, i have realized how easy it is to connect with others when they know you and you know you. the “where i’m from” poems from class really helped me reflect on my life up to this point and what main happenings or people stuck out to me and had a large impact on my life (“where i’m from george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i have learned that you must overcome the fear of what could go wrong and welcome the idea of becoming stronger not in terms of the wall or closing yourself off, but rather the opposite: to gain strength by allowing people in, showing them who you are at the core, not just the image you want to be seen as. root belief #2: i believe that i am searching for ways to grow in my faith. before coming to notre dame, i had always been one to go to mass with my family every single sunday. i have been fortunate to be able to attend catholic school for all my life, and i believe that is what shaped me to be who i am today and it has shaped my values as a person. i did quite a bit of soul searching towards the end of my senior year of high school as well as during the summer before coming to college, knowing that i would have to work hard to maintain everything that i've stood for up until that point as well as grow even further. at the beginning of the semester, i got so enthralled in the hustle and bustle of college-the school work of an engineering student and the social life of a college student-that i failed to recognize that i was missing mass and a stronger connection with jesus that had faded away during such a busy time. as studies started getting much more intense, and i failed to find a method that worked for me to manage my time, i knew i needed something that would help me. i decided to visit the grotto. “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” father kevin grove moreau fye week five). father kevin grove, in this quote, reminded me that although i may be struggling to study and keep up, it can teach me to learn new habits of studying and better time management, all of which has come out as a result of the struggle. after that first visit to the grotto of the semester, i felt a wave of peace and utter assurance that jesus was on my side and would, from that point on, hold my hand in such difficult times. ever since, i have been trying to visit the grotto every night as well as attend mass at the basilica. in his speech, david fagerberg reminds us all to seek god’s work in our lives and the world, but to do this, your heart must be open to faithfulness. he said, “faith sees god’s face peeking through every creature” (“faith brings light to a dark world” professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). my heart was not quite open to such faithfulness at the beginning of the school year, but once i recognized that and allowed it to open, the change was magnificent. this may lead some to wonder, “well how can i feel the same thing” or “why don’t i have that same reaction to the grotto?” and to this i would say listen to father pete’s video where he states how each faith journey is unique and different and “the greatest journey you will ever go on is the journey of self discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). i know that there is still more work that needs to be done to reach the point where i want to be in my relationship with god. i will try to continue keeping my faith in my college journey so that i can see god in all things and strengthen my faith. root belief #3: i believe that i am responsible for portraying myself in a truthful manner so that i can forge life-giving relationships. as i have been adapting to college and this new way of life, meeting new people, and experiencing new things, i have involved myself with many groups of people in an attempt to find where and with whom i fit best. especially within the gateway program, i have found a group of friends that have become my family in just the past two months. we, as a group, have already gotten through so many hardships, learned so much from and about each other, and have been able to grow as a unit on faith journeys, having personal growth, and forging relationships and i couldn’t ask for a better group of people to have my freshman year. however, i believe that some of these relationships would not have formed as strongly as they have or even not at all if i did not portray my true self from the very beginning and if i did not have a strong view of what i knew was a friendship versus what i knew was toxic. an article we read from class titled “5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” claimed that “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). i found a group of friends at the very beginning of my time here and we went everywhere together because our schedules matched up, for the most part. then i would notice that they met up very often on their own which i did not mind at all, but whenever all of us were together, there was definitely some tension and awkwardness, which had not existed before. i also felt very judged when i was around them. i could sense that i was not necessarily as welcomed as i was before and i had also heard from other people things they were saying behind my back. therefore, i decided to keep a bit of distance. after doing this, i found what seems to be my best friend and i branched out even more to the group as a whole. it feels so good to be around this person and i feel like i can be myself without feeling unwelcome or judged as i had felt before. comparing the two friendships and reading these articles, i now recognize the unhealthy aspects of the friendship from the “healthy vs. unhealthy” chart; previously there was no respect for each other’s independence, and there was a lot of jealousy, but now, there’s respect, humor, and happiness, which is the perfect situation (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). chimamanda ngozi adichie claims that “to insist on only….negative stories is to flatter...experience and to overlook the many other stories” (danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). with the negative friends i had before, they only focused on the bad, they only found the negative in what i had to say and did not listen to my explanation, or in relation to adichie, the whole story and therefore, i was portrayed in a negative way. i have learned the importance of knowing the whole of someone’s story and i hope that during my time here at notre dame, that awareness can grow even larger in order to form pure and valuable relationships with my peers. integration 2 assignment moreau fye 12/1/2021 overcoming challenges for a meaningful life the transition from being in high school and living at home with my family to living 8 hours away in college has certainly had its challenges. back home, i had this expectation of myself that if i didn’t have perfect grades or end up top of my class i would fail. school had always been relatively easy for me, and i had set the expectation that college would be the same way. everything in school had been going smoothly until one week, just before thanksgiving break, when all of my friends and i collectively had the most stressful academic week of our lives. i had never experienced a feeling like this before. i thought there was absolutely no way that i could get everything done on time, and i felt completely overwhelmed and burnt out. at the end of this week, we all went to mass on sunday, and when we walked back outside we had an impromptu snowball fight and couldn’t stop laughing. in this moment, all of us forgot about our stress and had fun without a care in the world, and i was reminded that moments like these are what i will remember most about college, not the score i got on a test or worrying about my grades. this experience reminded me of the article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit,” from week 9 of the moreau fye course, because it reminded me of the importance of letting go of any previous expectations that i set for myself to have perfect grades. one particular quote from this article that stuck out to me states, “ the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves)” (“ why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit ” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). before coming to college, i had associated my grades and academic success with my self worth. while it is still important to work hard and focus on my education, experiences like having a snowball fight with your friends after a stressful week are the times that i have felt pure joy and happiness, not when i got a good score on a test or assignment. for the past 5 years, i have struggled with body image and self confidence. this has led me to have a very poor relationship with food and exercise habits. by the end of my time in high school, i was working on healing my relationship with food and building self confidence, but then came the fear of the “freshman 15.” many people joke about this, but it can be incredibly damaging to people who struggle with body image. this semester has been a challenge for me trying not to fall back into old habits, especially in an unfamiliar place away from home. the video about kintsugi pottery in week 10 of the moreau fye course was very powerful for me because it helped me to realize that i am not broken or wrong for going through what i have gone through, and that i don’t have to be perfect to be doing better. the quote, “that they learn that https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring,” helped me to realize that i don’t need to change anything about myself to feel happy, and that i deserve to celebrate myself for who i am (“ women find healing through kintsugi workshop ” by grotto moreau fye week 10). going forward, i hope that i have the strength to fully heal. i have found that celebrating the small victories provides a huge confidence boost, even for something as small as deleting food tracking apps, which has already helped me feel a sense of freedom and power. when i first came to college, i had the unrealistic expectation that i would find my best friends on the first day of welcome weekend, and be best friends with all of my roommates. when i didn’t seem to find my group right away, i became discouraged and thought that i would never find my close-knit group of friends that i would have for the rest of my life. as the weekend progressed, i began forcing myself to try to fit in with a group and felt even more disconnected the more i did this. the text, “thirteen ways of looking at community,” made me reflect on the first week of being here at notre dame. the quote from this text, “of course, in our culture—a culture premised on the notion that we must manufacture whatever we want or need—learning to relax and receive a gift requires hard work...community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart,” felt very relevant to my first week here because it reminded me how i started to feel a stronger sense of belonging when i took a step back from forcing myself to belong to a group right away (“ thirteen ways of looking at community ” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). almost as soon as i stopped forcing myself to belong in a group, i met the people that are now some of my closest friends. i learned that allowing things to happen naturally instead of forcing them to happen is what makes the strongest connections with others, and i hope to continue to use this idea to foster stronger relationships throughout the future. my time thus far at notre dame has allowed me to grow in my faith. i did not realize how valuable the required theology courses would be to me and my faith until one day early on in the semester that i can still vividly remember. we had been discussing the persecution of many religious populations bce, and at the end of the class my professor simply stated that these people were suffering for the greater good because “god is responsible for everything.” as simple as this statement was, i remember getting chills down my spine and instantly feeling a deeper connection with my faith. i realized that everything that i am going through is not a punishment, but a plan that is meant to happen for my life. that class helped me to see that god is everywhere, and that i can strengthen my faith through small acts every day. this experience reminded me of a quote from week 12 of moreau fye describing the role of faith in the world. the quote states, “the way of the cross is everywhere, and we walk along it every day in spite of ourselves and often unknown to us” (“ hope holy cross and christian education ” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). one of the most peaceful and satisfying activities that i enjoy is walking around the lakes then stopping at the grotto. i have been able to use the knowledge that i have gained from my courses and experiences at notre dame to deepen my https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreaug%20through%20kintsugi%20workshop https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreaug%20through%20kintsugi%20workshop http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ faith through nature and everything that is around me, and i hope to continue this journey throughout the next three and a half years and for the rest of my life. microsoft word integration 2.docx what i want to do and who i want to meet i learned rather quickly after getting to notre dame that you encounter a lot of new things when you go out into the world, or in this case a couple square miles of land in northern indiana, by yourself you encounter a lot of new things. some of these things are pretty mundane. things such as worrying about how many flex points you’re spending and how to ration them across the entire semester, getting yourself up in the morning without a parent as a backup alarm, or having to actually go out and get food rather than having it already made for you by your mom. however, other things are a bit more serious such as living with a roommate, scheduling things by yourself, or dealing with the increased workload of college. while all of these things are important to learn how to handle there are bigger questions you come to encounter in college. some of these big questions include what major do i want to do, what do i want to do in the future, and how do i build relationships with people. i’ve personally encountered two of those bigger questions in my time here so far and while one of them is becoming clearer for me, the other has remained rather cloudy. those questions are what do i want to do in the future and how do i build relationships with people. the question of what someone wants to do in the future is a question everyone has to encounter at some point. some people know what they’re going to do from a really young age. other people don’t figure out what they want to do until they are adults and actually start looking for jobs. others still decide on a thing then reevaluate and decide on a different thing and do so over and over until they find the one thing they know they want to do. the point is everyone has their own paths to discovering what they want to do with their lives. for me, like many people, that time has come in college. this is not an easy thing for me though as i am a very indecisive person. in the wesley theological seminary commencement speech father jenkins talks about how those graduates used their conviction to get to where they were and accomplish what they had accomplished (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). this conviction is what was making this question difficult for me, but more specifically, my lack of conviction is what made it difficult. then again, it is difficult to have conviction making a decision you don’t know that much about. however, this changed throughout the semester. as father james king says about holy cross and christian education, zeal is developed when we act on what we have learned and experienced in and out of the classroom (“holy cross and education” by father james b. king – moreau fye week 12). throughout this semester i would say i have developed a certain amount of zeal, along with conviction, with regards to this question of what i want to do with my life. through my engineering classes and panels, i have gone to regarding future job opportunities i have become confident enough to at least significantly narrow my field of view with regards to what i am looking to do. even though i haven’t figured out exactly what i want to do in the future though, i feel i have developed enough conviction and zeal with regards to this question to be in a good place to take my new focused view and finally make an exact decision. the other big question i’ve run into since getting to college is how i form relationships with people. in our reading about the thirteen ways of looking at community parker palmer says in the first way of looking at community that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). for me though, community has rarely been a thing that has just fallen into my lap and that has been no different coming here. i’ve run into somewhat of a similar situation as emery bergmann did when she got to cornell where she inexplicably found that she was on the outside looking in of a lot of groups of friends despite being a rather social person in high school (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week 9). while i’ve run into a similar predicament here it isn’t exactly surprising upon some selfreflection. i haven’t been a very social person my entire life. i’ve typically been satisfied with having a few good friends rather than trying to force myself into large groups of friends. i also tend to be rather introverted, so i like to spend a decent amount of time hanging out by myself. so, a combination of these things about me and the daunting task of meeting new people in a new environment you aren’t comfortable in yet has led to somewhat poor results on the relationship building end for me. however, it isn’t that i don’t have people i will get lunch with on occasion or talk to in classes because i do have a couple people like that. my issue is more with developing those relationships and making them more than just the occasional lunch or classroom conversation. while i still struggle along this front though, i do think i’ve made a decent amount of progress recently compared to where i was when i got here. everyone when they go to college has to encounter new situations and questions about everything from simple day to day tasks like scheduling, to the bigger question of life like what do you want to do with your life. this no different for me as i have encountered two big questions. what do i want to do in the future and how do i form relationships with people. i have had very different degrees of success answering these two questions with what i want to do becoming much clearer throughout the semester while i am still struggling with the relationships question. however, even though i am still struggling with one of those questions, i feel like i have made good progress answering my questions and dealing with the situations i’ve encountered over this semester. wilson 1 andrew whittington moreau first year experience 5 october 2021 a creed to live by root belief #1: i believe that although i am in constant search for validation from others, i owe it to myself to be genuine and embrace my imperfections. through my experiences i have concluded that there is no end in the journey of discovering oneself. staying true to my interests and beliefs rather than being the person that someone else wants me to be is a constant struggle in my life. the following quote perfectly embodies my mindset and shows the reasoning behind this belief: “shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection. is there something about me that if other people know it or see it, that i won’t be worthy of connection?” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). after hearing this, my perception on self-validation changed drastically. it made me realize the absurdity of living a life in which my self-worth is determined by others. i should not fear being my true self. although this is much easier said than done, i will say that progress is possible. i have come to the conclusion that when i embrace my imperfections, my relationships with others grow stronger as a direct result of this trustworthiness, openness, and honesty. i believe that in order to live this out i must love myself before i can love others. to practice compassion with others we must first treat ourselves kindly. this form of self-respect may sometimes be confused as hubris, narcissism, or even egotism; however, this is a misconception. in order to embrace our true self, we must love ourselves. i personally relate to this quote by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be wilson 2 david brooks, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). i believe i need to value my strengths just as much as i value my weaknesses to ensure that my external success does not misrepresent myself by covering up my internal weaknesses. this viewpoint is one that i will hold with me throughout my life and is certainly a core belief of mine. root belief #2: i believe that faith is a main aspect of my life that must continue to be enriched for the betterment of myself as well as others. father pete said, “at the core of oneself is the very presence of god” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. – moreau fye week three). this statement right here summarizes my belief. i truly believe that god is within everyone; however, this means that we must find faith within ourselves. i must never fail to live by the fact that i will never be alone because god will always be with me. i would also like to stress that our surroundings can play a large role in our spiritual life and, in return, how we view and treat others. my personality and actions tend to conform to those around me which is why the religious aspect of notre dame is critical. it holds me accountable and keeps me in check which i need and appreciate. i also have a bad habit of praying only when i intend to ask god of something in return, effectively entrusting my problems to a higher authority. i also tend to seek god in times of trouble rather than gratitude which is unfair and wrong. this is something that i realize and need to improve regarding my relationship with god. one way in which i intend to better my relationship and faith life is by living in accordance to the following quote: “we cannot love the god that we do https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry wilson 3 not see, if we don’t love the brother whom we do see” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. – moreau fye week five). by bettering my relationships with others and extending my love for them, i will also be enriching my own faith life in return which fulfills this central belief of mine. root belief #3: i believe that forging life-giving relationships is not an entitlement to a single side but rather involves mutuality and compromise between two people. my personal definition of life-giving relationships are interactions that are beneficial to both recipients. before this course, i never gave relationships with various people much thought especially not in terms of categorization. i realized that a lot of friendships are built from discovering similar ways of thinking between you and another person. this means that you both enjoy and perhaps dislike the same hobbies, jokes, etc. bonding can occur through complaining about a mutual feeling, but excessive talk of disdain is unhealthy. just as olivia taylor wrote, “there is, however, a difference between confiding and excessive complaining” (“five signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). if someone only complains and never listens this is a clear sign of an unhealthy relationship which i failed to see before. i think the reason i did not previously acknowledge this was due to having a track record of healthy relationships which i certainly took for granted. now, i hope to take this new way of thinking and apply it to both existing and new relationships henceforth. i also hope to continue to lessen my entitlement as a result of ignorance by continuing to stay aware of these issues through engaging in conversation with others. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ wilson 4 root belief #4: i believe that understanding one’s personal bias is crucial to empathizing with others and something we must all work on to better ourselves. our bias and misconceptions can usually be connected back to our childhood and upbringing. because of this, it is important to understand where we came from in regards to both our misfortunes and blessings. in my poem i wrote, “i’m from the son of a steel miner who made it his time. i’m from two sisters who lead the way. i’m from being the youngest child who cries until it’s made his way” (“where i’m from” by – moreau fye week six). i have realized the hard work and dedication of my parents, and i possess a great gratitude for them as a result. i also appreciate the love and care that both of my sisters have shown me throughout my life. it is these things that we must realize and express gratitude for or else we will become human beings that lack compassion and are merely filled with hatred and entitlement. in a similar way, understanding our roots can help establish our innate differences with others. as keith payne wrote, “this tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne – moreau fye week seven). in response to this, being aware of ourselves and our biases is helpful to not only ourselves but our treatment of others as well. most people are not immoral people looking to discriminate, but rather they need to work on certain engrained characteristics in order to better themselves and others. i live by this statement and hope to continue to educate myself on the lives of others as well as my own to better myself as a whole. https://docs.google.com/document/d/176cyl4xgfmea2qfc2qpre4rirvhqbxio/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=114441429347016252455&rtpof=true&sd=true https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ integration two the power of choice my path in life is ambiguous. of course, growing up i found what i love to do, and what excited me to study. but while i may have found a direction, there was never any certainty about how it would all turn out. throughout this first semester of college, i have begun to realize that while i don’t know where i will end up, i do know that i have the power of choice. ultimately, i make the decisions that will guide my life. and i can choose a path where i succumb to anxiety, sadness and stress, or i can choose a path where i prioritize my well-being and happiness. both paths will most likely lead me to a future, but it is only by taking the ladder path that i will truly be living. having internalized this idea, the next thing to consider is making choices that value my happiness. i believe that the first hurdle i must overcome is pluralistic ignorance (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week 9). this is defined as doubting yourself and your capabilities with the belief that you are alone in your doubts and struggles. since we have no way of knowing the battles that others around us are facing, and are simply seeing a put-together life, it is so easy to come to the conclusion that we are simply less capable than others. pluralistic ignorance has led me to believe that i must simply be inferior to those around me. i am currently dealing with feeling this way about cheerleading. if i am struggling with a skill, it is hard for me to not fall into the mindset that everyone around me has this skill perfected, and i am just not as good as my teammates. but i do truly believe that the mind is flexible. if i make the choice to be confident in my own abilities, i can lessen the weight that this issue has on me. if i make the choice to look around and see the struggles that others are facing, i https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo will feel less alone and less inferior. and most importantly, if i make the choice to realize how little this really matters in the grand scheme of things, i will feel a lot more free. as i proceed through college, i know that stress and anxiety is inevitable. my goal is not to live a life that is free of these natural experiences. my goal is to create an environment where stressful situations have less of an impact on my mental state, therefore facilitating a path that is overall based in happiness and calamity. it is extremely important to have ways to cope with tough obstacles. i was very intrigued by studying the process of kintsugi (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto – moreau fye week 10). the art made through this practice teaches that our fissures are what make us golden. in the past, i’ve practiced mindfulness in order to create a better environment for myself – much like kintsugi attempts to do. interestingly, i began meditating while i was competitively rock climbing. before every practice, my team and i would meditate. i was astonished to see how much my outlook on both rock climbing and life in general improved through meditation. however, once i stopped rock climbing competitively, i was less motivated to continue this practice. given that i was not surrounded by my teammates anymore, i would have to make time in my schedule to commit myself to meditation. however, considering my experience in the past, i do believe that this is something i should incorporate into my life again. this may be a step in the right direction to create a calm mindset where i can roll with the punches, and have a positive outlook on difficult situations. recently, i have found that the company of others is an almost foolproof cure when anxiety begins to consume me. a few weeks ago, i had a really tough day. i felt like i kept getting knocked down, and by the time the end of the night came, my mood was terrible. i was sitting on the couch doing homework in this dire state when my friend from down the hall came https://youtu.be/jgjljeqd8gg https://youtu.be/jgjljeqd8gg by. we ended up talking for 30 minutes about random things. when she left, i was stunned by the change in my mood. while nothing we discussed was of any real substance, i felt 10 times better simply having gotten my mind off of the day. it was at that moment that i realized the power of community, and the power of choosing to immerse myself in a positive community. however, it seems that the building of community is more complicated than i might have thought. community is a gift in the natural course of life, and sometimes, taking deliberate action to connect with others can destroy relationships (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). so in what context would attempting to connect with others (which is a necessary part of life) be considered counterproductive to the development of actual community? but upon thinking about my experience a few weeks ago, this idea may actually make sense. it was when i was not deliberately trying to connect with others that i benefited from an uplifting community around me. overall, i must have the capacity for connectedness when dealing with obstacles. i do have to consider the course i’ve taken so far in life, and where that has gotten me. maybe feelings of stress have been the motivating factor in my life thus far. to be honest, going through life the way i have has reaped rewards, one of them being my opportunity to study at the university of notre dame. however, father james b king writes that “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by father james b king – moreau fye week 12). being open to change and compromise is the only way that i will truly and fully become the person that i want to be. my greatest need right now is to prioritize myself. i might fear this path, but i also recognize its importance. to truly enjoy both my college experience and my life as a whole, i must not only survive, but thrive. and it will be http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189390/download?download_frd=1 through resistance against pluralistic ignorance, making use of ways to cope with stress, and being open to connection with others, that my path in life will be satisfying and beautiful. beliefs that define me oscar anzola-schnell beliefs that define me to start to determine my root beliefs, i believe that it is important to be vulnerable as in this state is when one can truly search within. dr. brown states in her ted talk, “one of the big sayings in social work is lean into the discomfort of the work,” and while this search for internal truth is not social work, the message still applies. if i do not reach discomfort and doubt through my inner reflections then i did not go deep enough. for this reason, it is critical to be open to examining your own imperfections and doubts. furthermore, it is important to decide what we value in life. in his talk, david brooks asserts, ‘we live in perpetual self-confrontation between external success and internal values” through internal values, we achieve a real sense of achievement in life. through friendship, family, faith, and moral values, true value is added to our lives. it is important to always remember that life is ephemeral and external success is mostly unimportant. it is more beneficial to focus inwardly. i believe that true joy and success in life should be measured by how well we live up to internal values. tying to that point, i believe that faith is a critical aspect of life and without it, inner satisfaction cannot be found. emphasizing this point by describing people who truly believe in faith, david fagerberg says, “their very voices and faces are different from ours; stronger, quieter, happier, more radiant.” in this quote, faith is shown to have a positive effect on people. these people manage to bring meaning to their lives constantly through faith, hope, and love. although i am not religious i still believe these concepts can be applied to my life in a less obvious way. i think following the philosophy of treating others with respect and kindness can only improve your personal life. furthermore, having hope for the future allows you to be more optimistic about any problem you may encounter in the present regardless of faith. faith is not the only important factor in having a meaningful life. i believe that meaningful friends are a pillar of happiness. we are social beings and being around others will bring us joy. this quote by olivia t. taylor exemplifies why friendship is important, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term. think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend.” a long-lasting relationship is incredibly powerful and should be able to provide meaning to life. this extends further than the traditional notion of friendship to family, co-workers, teammates and others. strong bonds with others brings a sense of belonging and community. however, sometimes in our communities, we end up in bubbles of privilege. many times, we do not realize the value of things we take completely for granted and the sacrifices others made for us to be in the position we are in. for example, father sorin wrote back to france and said, “assuredly, we are far from complaining of the poverty of our lodging. god knows that we think little of it; and if we have desired as we do indeed desire to build a larger and more convenient house, it is solely that we may be able to accomplish some of the immense good we are called upon to do.” in this quote, he shows how we must approach even our most humble items. it is important to be grateful and not complain. furthermore, this passage demonstrates how we must focus on helping the lives of others through doing good in the world. i believe that we must recognize our privileges and do anything in our power to provide charity. coming from venezuela, my perception of privilege has been heavily influenced by where i come from. i have seen people in absolutely abhorrent conditions. venezuela was one of the richest countries in latin-america and is now by far the poorest. while i have been privileged enough to immigrate to miami, many people have not gotten that chance. desperate people need to scrape food from trash cans and walk thousands of miles to other countries in order to survive. i personally know people who are still stuck in poverty there, not knowing where their next meal will come from. i think this gives me a very unique perspective on both the world and giving to others. i believe that we should always be charitable and try to be unselfish. through charitable acts, one can also derive joy, but the value you give to others comes first. by recognizing our privileges, we must also confront problems that plague our own country. for example, racism is still going on and we must use our power to attempt to stop it as much as possible. “field experiments demonstrate that real-world discrimination continues and is widespread. white applicants get about 50 percent more callbacks than black applicants with the same resumes…” this quote demonstrates that implicit bias does have real-world effects. however small each individual’s bias is, subconsciously the effects are felt by those most marginalized in society. as society, we must do a better job of recognizing this as an important issue and do more to fix it. this starts with individuals reflecting on their own bias through tests and other possible discernment methods. after this, they should consciously keep track of their actions and thoughts to determine when they are being biased. if we all do our part to recognize biases, their impact on real-world outcomes diminish. i believe that we all have an obligation as a society to recognize bias and try to suppress its negative effects. in conclusion, i believe that our own inner beliefs must shape the way we view the world. from faith to friendships to charity, we must not forget what is important to us. i believe in fighting for a more equitable world through faith, community, and kindness. works cited “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbmkd0&index=4 “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim “faith brings light into a dark world” by david fagernerg moreau fye week three https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_ 2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau “5 signs you're a toxic friend” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ “fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. sorin moreau fye week five https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view “how to think about implicit bias” by keith payne moreau fye week seven https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ akinsanya_moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 discovering my new identity i believe that i am searching for new relationships and ways to adapt to the notre dame community and culture. i believe this because the transition from high school to college proved to be unexpectedly different from what i had imagined. the anxiety of a new environment, meeting new people, and the overall uncertainty of what i would encounter filled my mind for the first few days. however, i started to build new relationships due to hall programming events during welcome week which enabled me to meet new people who had different interests and were from various backgrounds. drawing from the quote; “there was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging and those who really struggle for it … they believe they are worthy”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one), i had to develop a sense of courage to show authenticity and connect with others. to form new relationships, i discovered that i must embrace vulnerability which is the willingness to be eccentric and to live in the moment. i began to meet people with similar interests (i.e., my intended major) and joined the non-competitive tennis team. i had found a new way to immerse myself in the notre dame community which included intentionally seeking opportunities in getting to know new people. one of the experiences that introduced me to the notre dame culture was the movie, “rudy” which highlighted the notre dame dream and the need for perseverance, which helps to foster the growth of an individual. this influenced my thought process/actions as i recognized that i needed this trait to succeed at notre dame and anywhere in life. drawing from student reflections on faith ("student reflections on faith", curated by campus ministry moreau fye week three), faith is shown to help “form and strengthen relationships … and develop what it means to live intentionally”. faith being a major relevant part of the notre dame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing community, i must incorporate the lifestyle of developing my faith to build new bonds. to develop my faith, going to mass became a way of adapting to the culture while drawing closer to god to show gratitude, and show commitment. a sense of belonging was created from this experience as i made new connections and felt accepted into a brotherhood at the alumni hall. i still believe that there are new ways i can adapt to the notre dame community and culture, and i plan to adopt the concept of vulnerability by participating in volunteering and new recreational activities such as table tennis, new clubs, or something that challenges me. i hope to continue going to mass to deepen my faith and strengthen my relationship with god and wholeheartedly live purposely. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by demonstrating respect, trust, support, and investing in something positive. i believe it is important to build healthy friendships that are based on these values where life-giving relationships are where we can all mutually grow together. this is evident in my experience of meeting my new roommate after transitioning into notre dame. this relationship is one i believe will be life-giving as we support each other and therefore created an environment where we can both learn and encourage each other in our endeavors. this feeling is also extended to the alumni community, where welcome week established a meaningful environment based on mutual respect and honesty. as a result, i made a photo essay based on the experiences and relationships i have formed in alumni hall for my multimedia writing and rhetoric class to highlight the significance of being accepted into alumni and reinforcing my sense of belonging. drawing from the text explaining the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships("healthy vs. unhealthy relationships", by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four), healthy relationships are usually grounded on honest/fruitful conversations, support, trust, and comfort while having dependence as opposed to unhealthy relationships based on https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing control, disrespect, dishonesty and a sense of dependence. a life-giving relationship would be healthy and enjoyable where we all can care for each other and grow to become better versions of ourselves. i believe that in order to forge a life-giving relationship, i must build a depth of character which correlates with two sides of our natures, specifically adam 2, which is “built by fighting your weaknesses”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). according to the video, the suffering from fighting our weaknesses constructs a depth of character to which one of my weaknesses is the anxiety about meeting new people. therefore, i must be willing to confront my fears and build these values required for a life-giving relationship. adam ii deals with moral logic, which is the humble side of our nature where i must also be willing to lose myself to find myself and give to receive. i hope to grow by taking the first initiatives in starting conversations with my classmates, try to form study groups with people of similar interests to build a relationship where we all benefit from by learning from each other, engage in recreational activities, discover more clubs, find a new interest/hobby. i believe that my purpose is to be a contributing part of the holy cross education and to give back to the community. an integral part of being at notre dame is to get a quality education, but it can be much more when i can purposefully use my education. drawing from the quote “education a work of resurrection”( "two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five) which was father moreau’s vision to make education a way to become a beacon of hope and change. the experience of getting a notre dame education became more meaningful to me, as i can use this education to impact people’s lives and improving their situations. i can also apply faith https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 into every part of my life and getting a quality education, which would bring about understanding god’s purpose for me and how i can use my talents. the purpose of giving back what i have learned to benefit the community reminded me of my roots and what/those that led me here. i started to identify my influences and everyone that has impacted/formed me to this point in which i want to give back to them in a substantial way( "where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). drawing from this text; “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start. let it flow. trust the work to find its own form”, i was able to gain insight and reflect on my influences. starting from africa to family to christianity, then a transition to milwaukee, and finally to notre dame and alumni hall. the experiences from welcome week to waking up early for classes to brotherhood all reinforce the feelings of giving back to a community that has given me so much. i haven’t had the opportunity to give back to the notre dame community, but i hope to continue my education with the insight of father moreau’s vision and plan to give back to the community by volunteering and donating my time on improving the campus, participate in fundraiser events, and donate when i can. i also hope to donate my time to teaching others, skills i know to improve the learning environment/process and practice eco-friendly behaviors. i believe that i pursue truth by recognizing my implicit biases and gaining new perspectives i believe this because it is important to realize when we make judgments based on a single perspective or stereotype. sharing a single perspective repeatedly creates stereotypes that tell incomplete stories, and we often believe them. drawing from the quote: “we all can be victims of implicit bias… we notice patterns and make generalizations”( "how to think about 'implicit bias'", by keith payne, http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven), one can infer that we tend to overgeneralize due to implicit biases and often are unintentional. though my peers might have made implicit biases based on my race, i have often made implicit biases on people based on their race/gender to which i want to change that by being open-minded and make the effort in listening to multiple perspectives. during daily interactions with my peers, i plan to become consciously aware of the implicit bias i possess and work against them by starting to treat people fairly and only consider their experiences. i also hope to assess people only on their characteristics/values rather than the racial/social group they are associated with. while understanding that implicit biases are unintentional, i plan on resisting them continually and remain open-minded to foster good relationships and pursue the truth. integration 1 assignment áine mcfail mr. whittington fys 10101 15 october 2021 what makes me who i am since arriving at notre dame, i have learned a lot about myself. it has been a very eye opening experience. i have been able to better identify my strengths and weaknesses, as well as the type of person i would like to become. it can be hard at times to realize that i am not exactly where i want to be but it is important to recognize that, so i can eventually get there. moreau has given me the opportunity to reflect and work on this. i believe that it is okay to struggle. the times that i have grown the most from are because of the struggle that i have been through. everytime i struggle, i come out a better person. i went into middle school not knowing anyone and had a really tough transition. “i am from crying in the dark,” (“week six poem” by áine mcfail moreau fye week six). i would come home and cry everyday, feeling like i had no friends. having gone through this, i have learned how to better make friends and that sometimes things take time. i also became more comfortable with doing things on my own and being more independent. i don’t really gain anything when it comes naturally. “let me tell you very quickly what we think about children. they are hardwired for struggle when they get here,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i think that we are all hardwired for struggle, and that since it is natural, we should make the most of it. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ytvxyioj9l4vsnns7o3qwy6ppcb1sdleahap7bbyah0/edit https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 i believe that i am a good friend. i think that to be a good friend, you have to be the friend that you would want. in my friends i look for thoughtfulness, respect, and someone who listens. it is unfair to ask for these things, if i am not willing to do them myself. i try to follow the rule, “to treat others the way that i wanted to be treated,” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). in certain situations, i think if i were in their position, what would i want me to do, and then i do that. i also don’t justify my actions in a toxic way. i would never use “because i love you,” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by brené brown moreau fye week four). to manipulate someone into thinking i did nothing wrong. i will be honest and own up to my mistakes. i think that by following these, i am a good friend to others. i believe that i am consistently improving myself. to become the person that i want to be, it is important that i recognize my weaknesses and the areas that i would like to improve. this takes lots of self vulnerability to do this. it can sometimes be difficult to admit that i am not perfect. at the beginning of high school, i was really bad at procrastinating. it would stress me out really badly. i realized that there needed to be a change in my life. it was hard to recognize at first because it can be hard to find things that you need to improve upon because we don’t want to look at ourselves in that way. “you go into yourself, you find the sin, which you've committed over and again throughout your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin and out of that wrestling that suffering then a depth of character is constructed.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). it is when we do this, that we become the best version of ourselves. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://youtu.be/mwq5ur9oz-g https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim i believe that faith has a strong impact on my life. i have recently started going to the grotto once a week with my friend. this has helped me for multiple reasons. we will walk together which has brought us much closer, and then it has also been good praying. i have struggled with feeling like i belong here. i have been praying about it when i go, and i have started to feel better about being here. this has strengthened my faith because i feel that god is listening to me. “it definitely hasn’t always been that way, but as i’ve entrusted different parts of my life to god, little by little, he has rewarded my trust time and time again.” (“student reflections on faith” by tim moreau fye week three).i also feel that way. i know that if i continue these weekly trips, i will be able to watch my faith grow over time. i also know that i will see a difference for the better in my life. i believe that i judge fairly. judgement and fairness were both in my top three traits in the quiz we took at the beginning of the semester. i also agree that these are some of the best traits that i exhibit. i always try my best to not judge people and if i do, to make sure that i have enough information to come to my conclusions. i am always sure to not judge people off of a story that i have heard, but off of my own experiences. i also try to recognize that everyone has different experiences with others. for example, someone can love and want to be with all the time, the person that i find to be super annoying. i also try to view situations from the other person’s perspective. it’s like how in a tv show, we see both sides of the story, and are able to not necessarily justify it, but to understand it. i believe that it is exactly like that in real life. in her ted talk, she says “i did not have a single story of america” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). she also recognizes that because she knows multiple sides, she is https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story able to make better judgements. i do my best to make sure that i am not judging others based on a single story. this way i am making the best judgements and am not letting one thing define a person. all of these “i believe that” statements are who i am and i do not want to change that. i only hope to grow through them during my time at the university of notre dame. week 13: integration 2 ryan moreau fa21 3 december 2021 week 13: integration 2 in my first semester of college, i have encountered many things. the moreau first year experience has had many overlapping characteristics with the experiences i have had so far. it has been interesting to see everything i have encountered showing up in my fun and fresh weekly modules. it has been important to my ability to process and work through many of the different obstacles and situations i have experienced. i have learned more about human interactions and highly detailed ways in which emotions and truths play into every relationship. it has not been all easy, and i relate greatly to the statement by cox that “there is no easy way to dismiss feelings that we are less capable than the people around us.” (“what_is_imposter_syndrome_and_how_can_you_combat_it” by cox, e. moreau fye week nine). this encountering dissonance quote, sadly, has become an extremely relatable strain for me over the past few months. i have struggled with feelings of inadequacy throughout my life because i was the younger sister to a highly successful brother and went to a rigorous preparatory school. however, college has fueled these feelings of imposter syndrome. one of my best friends i had made since getting here constantly talked to me in a condescending way that made it hard to feel adequate. i constantly felt as though i was treated as a child, and over time i began to feel like i deserved this treatment since i have a joking disposition and do act in an immature way for a good portion of the time. this is not a proper excuse for the way she treated me because i always made an effort to show a caring https://www.ted.com/talks/elizabeth_cox_what_is_imposter_syndrome_and_how_can_you_combat_it/transcript?language=en presence and have not felt the same energy reciprocated. i have begun to space myself away from her, and i will not longer be living with her next year. although this has been a difficult process, i am sure both herself and i will be grateful for the changes and the futures we hold. there are matters i have encountered that do not as greatly affect me, but do affect my great community. although i am becoming proud of my gateway identity, i have begun to notice some structural issues with the program that remind me of the quote, “the impact of historic redlining and unjust real estate practices throughout urban neighborhoods has led to lower levels of generational wealth for blacks as opposed to whites” (critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter by devron, c moreau fye week ten). i say this because the university of notre dame is a predominantly white school, which is not innately a bad thing as long as there is a push for diverse perspectives within their student body and curriculum. the issue i presently see is that gateway is a highly white program. there is not one black student. the breakdown in race compared to the university has to be with a higher preference to white students. it is just interesting to process such off putting discrepancies at a university that prides itself on a rich background of students through the many states presented, large international presence and ability to provide for students of all economic classes. i hope the future holds a more diverse presence within gateway and the larger university. in time, accepting and working forward as a gateway student has become integral to my college life, i noticed overlap with the quote “community does not depend on intimacy and must expand to embrace strangers, even enemies, as well as friends” (13-ways-of-looking-at-community by moreau fye week eleven). i have found that making connections with not only gateway students but also my holy cross college peers. i noticed that some amazing relationships can be made when you look past your dividing factors and are aimed https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ towards succeeding together. it is impossible to claim you are willing to be a member of a community unless you accept everyone. i over time i have been working on myself and my past opinions of people because it is easy to brush a person off for a bad experience in the past, rather than accept that maybe they had a hard day or it was a misunderstanding in the end. the community within holy cross is so small that you are able to live closely to each other and feel everyone’s presence. it has been good to meet so many different people from other backgrounds, and it is more important to actually get to know everyone, unlike if i was fully at notre dame where i would probably rely on people of similar backgrounds and thoughts for friendship. i have consistently struggled with my mental health. it relates strongly to the book screwtape letters when they state that “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty” (https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/30498/files/189605?module_item_id=106100 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). this luckily has not been as much as a struggle for me being at college. in the past, i would go through periods of depression, relating to the numbness in the quote. it was difficult, and i had only felt a few days of depressed states since getting here. it is comforting to feel as though i have risen above the emotional distress, which has been a huge part of my life. i feel like even if i begin to have periods like these again, i will be able to reflect on the fact that in the past i was able to overcome it. it will make these periods less difficult because i will have the hope of the days i live in now to come back. i would like to extend a thank you to the moreau program because so far it has become a consistently helpful experience for me. i am glad that i have encountered the many difficult situations of my past couple months because they have made me stronger and more discerning https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/30498/files/189605?module_item_id=106100 for the future. i hope for more experiences like this in the future and that i can grow from them as well. week 13integration two (jbaile22) 12-3-21 moreaufirst year experience integration two responding to my irish surroundings i think that in order to best understand what i have encountered and how i will respond, i should analyze my life before my time at notre dame. specifically, i will be thinking about my high school friends, and how they all went to purdue except for me. i was worried that i would be missing out on all of the fun things my high school friends did together, and i would be with an inferior group of people at notre dame. a quote from the week 9 qqc that stuck out to me comes from the new york times article, which said “the notion that my college friends should be stand-ins for my close relationships from home: impossible” (advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmannmoreau fye week 9). this helped me realize that at some point, i would have to make my own path and go on my own. college is a great time for this, as i am surrounded by such a diverse group of people and can truly be myself. here i am encountering a new group of people that will become my friends for life, and i am responding to my previous worries about my high school friends by recognizing that one does not replace the other. the week 10 qqc reminded me of how important it is to be inclusive when considering your own community. personally, i have not encountered many situations where i was excluded due to my ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc., but i am aware that this happens to millions every day. in order to combat this, i hope that when i encounter others going through something similar to this, i can provide a warm welcome to them. a quote that comes from the wesley theological seminary commencement speech helped me think about this, where father john jenkins told the audience “we cannot pretend to stand outside this. we are woven into it” (wesley theological https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkinsmoreau fye week 10 ). even if i am not directly impacted, i must be a force for good and positivity. whether that be in my dorm or in a class, i know that i need to be inclusive and welcoming to all, regardless of who they are. week 11’s qqc really stood out to me, as it spoke about difficult times in life. the courage and renewal article had a good line, where parker j. palmer wrote “hard experiences… are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmermoreau fye week 11). just like everyone else, i have encountered countless hard experiences in the past few months since i have arrived at notre dame. from something minute like getting a bad test score to something more serious like a falling apart with a close friend, there have definitely been tough days. however, i have learned a lot about both myself and others from these experiences. just like the quote says, said experiences have strengthened myself and the relationships i have with those closest to me. i confide in them when i need someone to talk to, and i know they always have my back. these negative encounters i have had during my time at notre dame have been unfortunate, but i have responded by truly discovering those closest to me. i think that “the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis is a really unique piece of literature, as it caused me to think unlike many other things that i have read. when relating it to the darkest times in my life, i think the quote that reminded me of it was “to decide what the best use of it is, you must ask what use the enemy wants to make of it, and then do the opposite” ( "the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewismoreau fye week 12). i can greatly apply this to my social life, such as when i am being peer pressured and tempted by others. those who do not have my best interest at heart may want me to drink or smoke too much, but what i should do is recognize that this is not what i should do. this “enemy” wants me to do something that will https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192386?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192386?wrap=1 harm me, so i should prove them wrong and ignore them. i need to prioritize what will bring me true happiness and success in life, and avoid the distractions that will cause me to suffer in the long run. over the next four years i will encounter situations and people that will tempt me, but i should respond by turning them down and making the right choice. this semester of the moreau first year experience has been a great opportunity to step back and reflect on where i want my college career to go. i started my journey in august with hardly any knowledge or expectations of where the semester would take me, and looking back now in december, i can tell how much of an impact this course has had. i have been able to discern how i should treat my relationships with others, and to prioritize certain ones over others. i have learned how to turn down harmful situations, and to know what is right for me. i have learned my strengths and weaknesses, and to work on my weaknesses while maintaining my strengths. all of the things that we have covered in this course are directly applicable to my everyday life, and i am extremely grateful for that. i know that this knowledge will apply to my next semester’s moreau course, as well as every course over the next three and a half years at notre dame. however, this course will not just apply to my time at notre dame, but the rest of my life. i have learned how to be a better son, brother, roommate, friend, and family member. i have learned that when i encounter certain situations, i need to respond in a way that is good and wholesome. anderson moreau integration final anderson 1 dr. chan moreau fye 10/11/21 a home built on rock: the foundational beliefs of my life below are my core values. upon reflection, i noticed that all of them really come from the same influences so i decided to write about all of those influences here instead of individually. my root beliefs have been formed by my catholic faith, the way in which my family raised me, my education (both my formal schooling and the independent studies i choose to pursue especially literature), my friendships, and my own experiences and reflections. core values: 1) i believe that suffering and failure are inevitable and yet overcomable and redeemable i thought this brene brown’s video on vulnerability (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) was very insightful as a whole but extremely relevant to us as we are beginning the college journey. i identified with the speaker very much: i often try to avoid vulnerability and uncertainty. however, i also agree that this is not a feasible way to live. it will not bring fulfillment. i think her point that numbing vulnerability also numbs joy was very persuasive. when we try to avoid vulnerable situations like asking for help we often become more overwhelmed and end up not necessarily vulnerable to another person, but vulnerable to our stress. this holds true to the teachings of catholicism as well. we cannot avoid suffering. it is inevitable and universal. however, the church teaches that we can persevere through suffering and adversity and ultimately find peace and joy through others and god himself. furthermore, in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be anderson 2 order to believe that suffering has value, one must have hope. professor fagerberg talks about the nature of hope: “hope is the confidence that we are moving toward light, not darkness; joy, not sorrow; life, not death. and yet even tribulations can advance us toward the kingdom of god. hope is confident because it rests upon god’s power, not our own” (“faith brings light to a dark world”by david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week three). i think hope is one of those interesting concepts. it is a blend between realism and optimism. it is not just fancy or ignorance or idle dreaming, but is in fact an admirable quality. i think fagerberg makes a point that illuminates why hope is admirable. he says “hope is confident because it rests upon god’s power, not our own”. it is not idle dreaming because it is not saying “everything is right with the world” or “nothing could possibly go wrong” or “i can do anything”. hope accepts that we are out of control, but simultaneously that god is in control. it is the ability to trust that all things, even darkness and tribulation, work towards the greater good of those who love god. if one has this mindset of trust, they can better face any difficulties because they have peace in their heart and confidence that even suffering can be redeemed and glorified. several students talked about this concept in their “faith journeys at notre dame” and i believe it from my own experience. 2) i believe that success and perfection are not as worthy a goal as virtue and character formation i loved brooks' talk about “resume virtues” versus “eulogy virtues”. i agree with him that the eulogy virtues, centered around character, are ultimately more fulfilling than the ones centered around personal success. he states, “adam one is built by building on your strengths. adam two is built by fighting your weaknesses...and out of that wrestling, that suffering, a depth of character is constructed” ( “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim anderson 3 moreau fye week two). i think this is a beautiful quote that has many layers. i believe it is true that our culture is very success oriented and perfection is a major value. thus, as a result, people tend to focus on and define themselves by their strengths. this is seen by how resumes are often about “selling yourself” as the perfect applicant for a job. however, “strengths” do not just refer to one's natural virtues, but morphs itself into every ability, award, or accomplishment one has ever received. though not wrong in and of itself, this definition fosters a very achievement based culture, where people tend to ignore and omit their weaknesses (or even the reality of weaknesses) because success is based on perfection. another point of this quote however, is that one should fight to overcome their weaknesses, and through this struggle, forge a deeper character. people should not be ashamed to acknowledge their weaknesses, but this does not mean they should justify them. each one of us can constantly improve our character, not for the purpose of improving our resume, but because the possession of virtue results in a more fulfilling life. as the ancient latin proverbs say, “strength rejoices in the challenge” and” the strongest characters are forged through fire”. 3) i believe that true education should enrich your mind and heart this value is very important to me and i find support for it in notre dame’s mission as articulated by fr. grove: “he founded holy cross to remind the world that the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” ( "two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). we are hopefully not getting an education just for the sake of a diploma, but so that we can use that acquired knowledge for a greater purpose. a proper education cultivates both your intellect and heart with the ultimate purpose of a forged character so that one can be a source of good in the world. i believe true fulfillment comes https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 anderson 4 through the cultivation of both the mind and the heart and i agree that both should be guided by faith and reason so that we can not only have transcendent ideas, but the ability to make them a reality. a real catholic education is not contingent on what you are studying, but on why you are studying. we don't all have to be theology majors to serve god. we can take any subject or passion of ours, guide it towards the service of god and neighbor, and allow it to help us grow in virtue, 4) i believe that humans are complex and that generalizations undermine the depth and dignity of each individual in the talk about the “dangers of a single story” the speaker described how she had once reduced a family in their town to nothing more than “poor” and through this mentality she flattened their humanity:“i was startled. it had not occurred to me that anybody in his family could actually make something. all i had heard about them was how poor they were, so that it had become impossible for me to see them as anything else but poor. their poverty was my single story of them” (“danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven)i really liked her point that it is important to have a person's whole story, not just selective parts, in order to really understand them because humans are so complex. we are not just one thing. we each have depth and dignity. i found her point interesting that when you repeatedly think of a person as nothing more than a “victim” or “poor” it undermines their humanity. it flattens their character and reduces them to nothing more than a pathetic mental image. someone might be poor, but that doesn't mean they can't have a love for art, a sense of humour, or an interior peace. there is much more to their identity than their poverty. yes, there is real suffering in the world, but, as i send in one of my earlier core values, part of the remarkableness of human https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story anderson 5 nature is the ability for us to triumph over that suffering and live a fulfilling life nonetheless. furthermore, i think it is important that people don’t stereotype or generalize because when this occurs we lose sight of the individual. at the heart of every action is an individual. each one of us has free will and a conscience and we determine how we act. generalizations wipe away the nuance and complexity of each human being. people are reduced simply to the words “victims” and “victors” without actually exploring the depth and dignity of each of those people. i believe this is a dangerous mentality. 5) i believe that fulfilling relationships are based on mutual respect and investment and focused around depth in the article about whether or not you are in a toxic relationship the following quote stuck out to me as the epitome of disrespect: “as they respond with “mhmm,” “yeah,” “wow,” their minimal interest shows that they’re not terribly invested in you and don’t really care about what you have to say. ironically enough, it’s usually the friend who never listens to you who expects you to listen intently to them”("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). mutual respect and willingness to listen to and understand each other is key in a relationship. there must be a free discourse of ideas.it has been said that the opposite of love is not hate, but rather indifference. when one speaks it is the act of sharing their inner thoughts with another. when one ignores or “tunes out” what someone has decided to share with them it is one of the most insulting actions a person can take. even disagreeing is preferable, because in order to disagree one at least had to have put the effort into listening to what you had to say. when one ignores you they are indirectly saying that you are not worth the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ anderson 6 slight effort of them paying attention and that nothing truly valuable is coming out of your mouth, which could also be interpreted as “nothing that you think is worth sharing”. i think this is indeed a toxic mentality. as the article stated, so often the people who ignore others are the ones who talk the most. i agree with the article's point that toxic relationships are ones that are imbalanced. for the relationship to succeed and flourish both people need to be truly invested in each other and act accordingly. in my “where i’m from'' poem (moreau fye week six), i talked about how some of my greatest memories are having deep talks with others just in a car where we both sacrificed our time and just partook in an enriching conversation full of depth. those conversations have shaped me and i value them immensely. 6) i believe that self-reflection and knowledge are key to personal growth the moreau fye objective of defining your beliefs and values (which find its culmination in this assignment!) stood out to me because i believe this goes hand in hand with the idea of self-knowledge. your beliefs and values are an essential part of your identity and they inform the way in which you live your life. i believe sharpening the definition of your values through self-reflection is an essential step in living your life more meaningfully and intentionally. since man is by nature teleological, when we have clear and defined goals of our personal beliefs, principles, and values it helps us match all decisions of our life towards that larger goal of our desired character. i enjoyed taking the via survey (“via character strength survey” by via institute on charactermoreau fye week two) immensely and i think such tools are helpful for self-reflection and personal growth. the test said that my top strengths were perspective, anderson 7 spirituality, curiosity,self-regulation, and prudence. i found this information both accurate and insightful. thank you! professor pruitt mor capstone integration 20 april 2022 accomplishing my live well-lived my mission is to work to become the best version of myself and build others up along the way. i seek to discover my purpose in my life and apply it into all aspects of my life: work, family, friends, and the person i become. i will grow in my relationships with others by actively looking for ways to help others and being present to those around me. i value the opinions of those around me, and first seek to understand them before i judge. i will recognize all the opportunities i am provided with and work to take advantage of every one that i can. i look for ways to better myself and view different experiences whether good or bad as chances to grow. i am a dependable daughter, sister, and friend. as a daughter, i am respectful of my parents and am grateful for all they have done for me. as a sister, i am a role model for my siblings and someone they can always talk to. as a friend, i am supportive, trustworthy, and compassionate. i keep a positive attitude towards life and acknowledge that while i cannot control everything, the way i react to the circumstances i am faced with, i can always control. (moreau fye week thirteen) throughout my next three years here at notre dame, i will work to live out this mission statement and embark upon the journey towards my life well-lived. the first way i will live out this mission statement is through the way i treat others. as we heard earlier this semester, “life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i believe this statement to be true and in my life well-lived seek to have meaningful and healthy relationships with others whether it be my peers, family, friends, co-workers, etc. in creating these relationships it is important that i work to make time for others and when i am with them truly be present with them. making this time could be getting lunch with a friend, going on a walk, calling my family, or just checking in with my friend and seeing how they're doing. in conversation with my mom during week 5, she confirmed that something i value deeply is my relationships with others and thus is a necessary component in my life well-lived. (moreau fye week 5). i seek to be a compassionate friend and one that people know they can always come to and is always there for them. i will work to accompany my friends as well as those i am not as close with. “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). through accompaniment i am able to work with my friends through what they are going through without attempting to solve their problems for them. in the same way, i will be open to others doing the same for me. another important aspect of these relationships is the opportunity i have at notre dame to form relationships with people who differ from me and i otherwise would not have met. “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). in my classes and throughout my dorm i have the chance to expand my circle, and during my time in college it is essential that i expand them by getting to know people different from me. creating these relationships now and beginning to expand my circle will only allow it to grow larger once i graduate and enter into the real world. no matter who i come in contact with, if i am close to them or not, i hope to be someone that is kind and welcoming and makes everyone feel valued and respected, keeping in mind, “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). another aspect of my life-well lived is discerning my vocation and what i am meant to do with my life. i hope to pursue a career that aligns with my interests and brings a sense of joy into my life. while i do not know exactly what career path i want to pursue at the moment, i know that is a process that spans overtime and i do not need to have it all figured out yet. finding the career that fits me best will take time and trying different things (moreau fye week four). here at notre dame, i know i will have the opportunity to take advantage of all the resources the school has to offer in assisting me with my career. regardless of the career path i take, i hope to have a job that brings me joy and allows me to help others. i know a career that provides me with this sense of joy will push me to work harder and allow me to enjoy going to work everyday. “joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to extend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). however, my life well-lived does not center around my career, as there are many other roles i play in my life from sister, daughter, to friend. while at school, it can sometimes feel like i am solely working towards a career, it is important to remember that, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week one). in looking at my life through this lens it is clear that my life centers around many more aspects that play just as crucial if not more important role in my life. finally, in order to achieve my life well-lived it is necessary that i remain self-aware and look for ways to better myself as well as overcome the obstacles in my life in a healthy manner. one way i can achieve this is through insight and being introspective. “similar studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). in being insightful with myself i will better be able to achieve my goals outlined in my mission statement, in particular the way in which i react to obstacles i will face. another way of being introspective is ensuring that i am staying open to all opinions around me and not finding myself falling into the trap of an echo chamber (moreau fye week eleven). avoiding echo chambers not only allows me to educate myself and form educated opinions, but also allows me to form relationships with those who think differently than me; ultimately expanding my horizons and social bubble as mentioned previously. here at notre dame i am surrounded by numerous examples of those who are living a well-lived life and who push me to do the same. one such example from the past is fr. hesburgh who dedicated his life to notre dame and making an impact in the world, one quote from him being, “i had my shot, i did what i had to do” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week two). i aspire to have this same passion in my life and make a difference in the lives of those around me. in living out my mission statement and continually reflecting on the way in which i desire to live my life, i am confident that i will be able to achieve my life well-lived. moreau ∫∫∫∫∫∫∫ assignment 10/15/2021 friendly learning—the way to a healthy life the path through life may not be crystal-clear, but there are things we naturally do to guide ourselves through it. two of those things are the act of learning and having friends. it is my belief that in my life and others, learning and friends are the two most important guiding factors, and that fostering healthy knowledge and relationships will lead to a better, more healthy life for both myself and those around me. learning is very important to living a fulfilling life, as well as to being an upstanding member of society. learning can be in the sense of knowledge, and in that case i personally find it fun and fulfilling to know about as many different things as possible so that i am not ignorant of important elements to our lives and society. however, learning can also be in the sense of gaining a broad understanding of others and their own perspectives and knowledge on the world. this is a crucial element of learning that many in societies both past and contemporary have severely neglected. rather than attempting to take into account the variety of viewpoints and backgrounds of our society, people tend to squeeze and shove diverse groups of people under generalizing labels and ideas; this is known as stereotyping, and is bad because it unjustly and unfairly assumes things, often very negative ones, on people without any regard to the individual’s actual persona. stereotyping relies on flawed reasoning; it involves inductively assuming the traits of a group based on scattered (usually cherry-picked) examples, despite that a single counterexample is enough to invalidate inductive logic, and then from that it deductively places said traits onto individuals just because they are a part of the group in question. the evil of stereotyping has leached itself so deeply into society that it can affect people at the subconscious level, even when they are trying to be as impartial as possible; this is the issue of implicit bias, which even today causes substantial issues such as people unfoundedly perceiving african-americans as more cold and violent (“how to think about implicit bias” by payne, neimi, and doris—moreau week 7). these problems are only a small sampling of the many widespread societal problems caused by a lack of willingness or emphasis on understanding and learning about others and their own perspectives. i believe that through learning about others, these problems and my impact on them can be mitigated. for me and those around me to have the best possible lives, coming to a mutual understanding of each other will be best, so that we can avoid harming each other and rather can boost ourselves. learning about others may be good, but it should also go the other way: others should be able to learn about you and me. it is important that you make yourself vulnerable to others so that they may learn about you. do not be shameful and unwilling to open up; as dr. brown says in her tedx talk, “...shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection.” often it is so that by staying shy for fear of humiliation, others do not get the chance to understand or connect with you in the first place (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown—moreau week 1). actively showing vulnerability will not only open up others to your own perspectives, but will also help foster a sense of community and mutual understanding, and help you express your true self additionally, it is important for me to come to an understanding of inner self. knowing where we’re from and what we want can help us identify our values and priorities and overall contribute to better mental health. it is helpful for one to introspect on what led them to be who they are; one way to do this is to write a “where i’m from” poem (“where i’m from” by https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html george ella lyon—moreau week 6). in addition, through inner reflection, we can tackle our issues and refine our character, as character building is not just about building on our strengths, but also about addressing our weaknesses (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks—moreau week 2). overall, our past is tied with our character and our future, and our inner self is connected with everything we do and how we think. being very in-tune with the inner self is thus very helpful in life. connected with the idea of learning about others is the idea of becoming friends with others. friendship is extremely important to life as a whole. friends provide emotional support, happiness, interactions that help mutually build character, and overall are very good to have. however, friendships are not simple: they must be cultivated and developed. friendships can even cause problems, so it is important to know how to manage them. so far, i believe i have obtained very healthy friendships, where we have shown mutual vulnerability, and through that i am becoming more comfortable with my energy and attitudes about life here at notre dame. life has many challenges, and one option is to rely on your friends in times of hardship. friends can be a helpful means of guidance and support if you have developed very healthy relationships. this can often be difficult; people frequently end up in relationships that do not work out, but they do not realize it because they do not notice the signs (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor—moreau week 4). by evaluating your relationships, you can ensure that they are all healthy and cut out unhealthy ones. with wholly healthy relationships, you will have a strong support system for getting through challenges. faith can also help give a stable framework to base your life on, so that you do not lose focus on your values or path in life (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick—moreau week 3). the support system of your friends can be augmented with faith if you so desire to ensure that https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois you have a backbone to overcome any obstacles in your way. i personally think i do not need to rely on faith at this point in my life because i have a strong foundation of supportive friends, but faith will always be an option if i need it. throughout life, we search for the means to thrive and stay happy. i believe that learning and friends are the best ways to achieve happiness and our goals. as we gain knowledge, wisdom, and allies for ourselves and each other, we also develop our mind and spirit, building our own story, similar to how the founders of notre dame built their own stories and the story of the school on one another (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove—moreau week 5). the end result is that learning and friends profoundly shape the lives of both us and others in a positive light, bringing about health and happiness and turning the world into a better place. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 noah mayer moreau first year experience integration assignment one 10-15-2021 i won’t be kept down i believe that the world is fundamentally flawed and broken. i believe that it is impossible for me to fix the world. i believe that i am called to fix whatever i can. i believe that the world is fundamentally flawed and broken. in many ways, i was sheltered growing up, simply because i was an upper-middle class white male. but despite this, or perhaps to counteract this sheltering, my parents made an intentional effort to show me the way the world really was. they did not shy away from reading me books that dealt with hard truths, or explaining news stories to me in ways that, while allowing for my youth and lack of understanding that came with it, were still frank, truthful, and not sugar-coated. when i went to school, i began to encounter brokenness personally for the first time. i saw the disrespect and contempt my classmates had for my teachers, for each other, for the girls in my class. i saw their thoughtlessness and ignorance up close. and i began to see the brokenness in myself as well, the ways in which i was ignorant and thoughtless and the ways in which i was weak, in which i gave in to temptations i knew were wrong. my awareness has only deepened with time, as i saw millions of self-proclaimed christians bow down to an idol of power in the 2016 election, as i saw my classmates progress from crude jokes to alcohol and sex and drugs, as i saw myself falling into temptation again and again, or else misstepping from ignorance or thoughtlessness, or giving in to implicit bias, as i saw a man crying for his mother while those who were supposed to protect and serve him knelt on his neck. even here at notre dame, i continue to see brokenness. the simple fact that we are required to read texts and watch videos on unhealthy relationships and relationship abuse is proof that our community here is incomplete and flawed (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship, olivia t. taylor, grotto, moreau fye week 4), and i have seen examples of those flaws myself in how my hallmates talk about their female classmates here. here at notre dame, i’ve been confronted with more people of color and other minorities than ever before, and its made me more aware of my own implicit bias, as has my experience in the classroom (how to think about ‘implicit bias’ – keith payne, laura nieme, john m. doris, scientific american, moreau fye week 7). i know that there is goodness and beauty in the world, i’ve seen much of it myself, but i won’t ignore the mountain of pain and suffering that still exists in the world. i cannot and will not turn away from it. i believe that it is impossible for me to fix the world. the world is broken to an extent that is impossible for any one person to fix. there is only so much i can do about the palestinian-israeli conflict, or the mess that is afghanistan, or racial injustice in the us. to some extent, i think i have always known this, but it’s only been recently that i have been able to articulate it. this may seem a bleak belief, one of cynicism or depression, but it is in fact a liberating belief. as my pastor says, not every need is a calling. there is a mountain of pain and suffering in the world, but that does not mean all of it must fall on my shoulders. in knowing that i cannot do everything, i am freed from that burden. i can release that responsibility. and as we talked about in our third week of class, i rest easy in my faith and hope that, although i cannot fix everything, there is a god who can and will one day (faith brings light to a dark world, professor david fagerberg, grotto, moreau fye week 3). i believe that i am called to fix whatever i can. the fact that i cannot change everything does not excuse me from not changing anything. to quote greendot, no one has to do everything, but everyone has to do something. my parents impressed on me that i have power. maybe not great power, but some power. and with any power comes the responsibility to use it well. so when i see injustice happening before my eyes, it is my duty to do what i can to fix it. if all i can do is publicly name it for what it is, then that is what i will do. if i can actively step in and intervene, then i will do that too. after all, what is the point of educating either the heart or the mind if i do not use those things to better the world around me (fr. sorin letter to basil moreau, moreau fye week 5)? what does that look like for me? it looks like lending an ear to a friend in distress, and doing what i can to comfort them. it looks like calling out misogynistic language when i see it used in my dorm. it looks like giving my time freely to help my classmates through their homework. it looks like using my strengths to help those around me (via character strengths survey, moreau fye week 2). it looks like being unafraid to be vulnerable, to let others see me both so that they may learn from me and grow and so that in seeing how my actions in the world reflect who i am i can better know myself and continue to grow in my own self (the power of vulnerability, brené brown, tedxhouston, moreau fye week 1). it has not been easy. it is not easy now. so often, the temptation is there to just sit back, not make a stir, let things be the way they are, pass the responsibility on to someone else. we read an article in my sociology class this semester about the lack of diversity in the fashion industry, and how everyone inside the industry passed the buck to someone else, saying they would do something about it but the others did not want them too. well i refuse to be that person. i may fail. i will fail. i have in the past. i will fall. i have done that in the past too. but i refuse to let those falls and failures defeat me. i refuse to stay down. i refuse to let the world strip me of hope, my faith, or my principals (where i’m from poem, moreau fye week 6). the shadow may drag me down again and again, but every time i will rise again. i won’t be kept down. “the road less traveled” i believe my purpose is to serve others. whether that service is big or small, i hope to dedicate my life in service to others. this is why i came to notre dame, so that i could continue on my path to serve others. it is my vocation to be a doctor, and i can not think of a better place to follow that calling. the more i live at notre dame the more i realize how special this place truly is, the campus, but also the people. i have also been able to discern my values and my morals with a certain conviction here. i not only am able to receive a great education at notre dame but also join many clubs geared towards medicine and service to others. notre dame continues to enable me in my belief. i know i believe in service because of the via character strength test. according to the test my number one strength was kindness. (https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup by via moreau fye week 2). from this i was told my strength lies in doing good deeds for others. i think it is a perfect strength for a doctor to have. i hope to continue to employ it long into the future using what notre dame has taught me. i also believe i am responsible for not only my family and my friends. yet in a larger sense i believe i am responsible for loving others, no matter who they are. father sorin and blessed basil moreau both made it their mission to live for others, and to live outside themselves. they passed this state of mind down into the great university that is notre dame. father sorin wrote in his great letter to blessed basil “i thank heaven that i am now among them. no, i cannot believe that it was without some special design that, for many years, god inspired me with so great a desire to labor for them; i cannot suppose that, without any premeditation on my part, he has brought me among them from so far, simply to sec. them https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup without being of any service to them.” (https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view by father sorin moreau fye week 5). father sorin was ready to love and serve the people he encountered in his life. i too wish to be the same way and the culture of inclusion that notre dame cultivates will help me immensely. i know i am responsible for making sure all feel welcome, and that i may love all, not just my family and friends, though they are foremost in my life. i can also work to not only get rid of implicit bias in my life but also in society in general. a very lofty goal but everyone must play a part and i believe in my role and my responsibility for that change. for example, “it just means your brain is working properly, noticing patterns and making generalizations. but the same thought processes that make people smart can also make them biased.” (https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. dorris moreau fye week 7). i can work against the extra thought process that disillusions so many. i know that this is my responsibility and notre dame will give me a step in the right direction with the number of people i can interact with here. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being loyal and listening to those around me. i grew up in a house with 5 other siblings and i loved every second. i also know that sometimes it might be hard to get your voice heard. as a result, when i forge my life-giving relationships and deep friendships with others, i try to make sure they feel listened to. my relationships are not always perfect though and sometimes they leave me wondering how i messed up or who can i really trust. when we read about the red flags in relationships it was very helpful for me to reflect on past relationships and understand what went wrong. for example, “you may notice that they can only hang out when it’s convenient for them.”(“https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ by https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ olivia t taylor – moreau fye week 4). often, i could point out a toxic trait on either my behalf or the other persons. by being empowered now i can know which relationships are going to be life-giving that i can be loyal to. yet, in the end i always renew my faith in others as well as god and keep working to meet and grow with others. i think dr. brené brown was very right when she said, “in order for connection we have to let ourselves be seen, really seen.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). by listening i let others be seen, and then through loyalty and care i can open up to my friends as well. it is not always easy but when you finally do accept vulnerability your life-giving relationships take on a whole new facet of reality. i am overjoyed to be in this special place and knowing everyone i meet can be a new lifelong friend. this is to say there can be many types of friendships but knowing what i know about red flags i can navigate my relationships at notre dame and continue to serve. notre dame seems to check every box in what i believe or want to work towards. it is remarkable to think that i have only been on this campus for 8 weeks. the time seems to have flown by, but also lengthen. the people i have met and the relationships i have forged seem like they have taken place over years, and i am very close with people who were strangers 8 weeks ago. the energy at notre dame is exhilarating and i know that my beliefs are welcome here. what is more, i welcome others’ beliefs and i hope to interact with as many as i can while here. i know notre dame is the place for my belief in service to grow, a place where my responsibility to always love others can grow, and finally a place where i believe i can make the most out of my life-giving relationships. the future is very bright. notre dame will send me out to do good in the world and i can not wait to live out my beliefs. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be cunanue moreau capston moreau fye prof. retartha 29, april 2022 looking backward to better look forward to the future after the completion of my freshman year at notre dame, i have discovered my personal mission statement to be: my objective is to provide a good example for my siblings, peers, and friends. i'll try to stay ahead of the curve since being prepared reduces the danger of failure. i will strive to be a shoulder on which anybody can rely because being reliable assures that people close to you can overcome any difficulty and fosters more meaningful trustworthiness. as a sibling, middle kid, and responsible friend, this should be my first act. i want to help ensure that the engineers of notre dame can always be viewed as overqualified for any task at hand, for being an engineer is to be a universal problem solver. engineers should always be able to tackle any situation with logic to eventually end at an equally logical solution. my aim for each day is to finish a to-do list. i value completing my objectives swiftly so that i may enjoy a healthy state of mind, workout to my heart's delight, and be happy with what i have achieved by the time my head hits the pillow. as a responsible student, i prioritize my responsibilities as a student. i respect my campus community and will always contribute by working hard in clubs, demonstrating school pride, and setting a good example for others. i aim to be as competitive with my peers as possible, not out of malice, but to ensure that we all give our utmost in our positions. to maintain my role as a student healthy, i must make it a daily priority to complete all assignments on time. my own freedom of choice and the right to exercise that freedom are important to me. i will accept responsibility for all decisions; hence, i will strive to do my best in all i do in order to live a life without regrets, or with the fewest number of regrets. i prefer not to blame my circumstances since i had the freedom of choice, capacity, and work ethic to live a healthy, stress-free, and productive life. writing my personal mission statement at the end of freshman year has had the most positive impact on me as i reflect on all my experiences to be able to better understand who i am and, more importantly, who i want to be. the result of all that introspection is the personal mission statement above that encompasses all important aspects of my life that i value the most to continue strengthening. the topics covered in moreau this semester also helped refine my mission statement through its focus on helping me understand what a life well-lived is to me through proper self-reflection. what i had learned this semester in moreau was helping me the moment i sat down to write my personal mission statement as i found the most isolated corner on the second floor of the hesburgh library for my body and mind to experience the space to properly reflect on myself. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one) once i had acquired the correct environment to write a personal mission statement in, the words flowed smoothly onto the document, beginning with my driving force in life. while i understand the value of selfishness, in so far as its the internal drive to succeed beyond others, what truly motivates me has to be those around me. i came to the conclusion that although i sometimes fail at it, i want to be an example for my friends and family. this is to not only make myself happier but because i believe it to be a responsibility an older sibling such as myself has to guide his younger siblings to succeed beyond even him. also being an example for friends has personally led to some of the greatest personal growth i have experienced during freshman year. by constantly pursuing to be the version of myself that most benefits those i care about, i am also striving to become who i want to be once i graduate from notre dame. beyond just being an example, i want to be dependable. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ trustworthiness is something that i dearly value. my mother ingrained the value of trust in a relationship to me early on. she would always base our own relationship on trust, constantly highlighting that life is just easier if those around you can depend on you. for my personal mission statement i went even deeper than that. i explicitly wrote why that trust was so crucial to me: friends and family. i have to ensure that i am always able to be trusted upon; always have my head above the water so that i can help any friend or family rise to the top if they are ever sinking into despair. this level of trust is what motivates me to work a lot of times because i do not want to become the person whos family looses trust in him. next up in my personal mission statement refers to how i define myself: an engineer at notre dame. i added this section because i was remind of a quote from my week 11 qqc, “[w]e should be intentional to the information we expose ourselves to; seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (how to avoid an echo chamber by thinknd moreau fye week eleven) the foundation of engineering is to intellectually challenge yourself with your peers, and part of that process is to disagree with each other until the answer is found. this part of my personal mission statement, i wanted to remind myself that as an engineer, i will be pushing myself intellectually harder than i ever have before because if i do not, then i am tarnishing the pedigree of the degree i want to receive in three years. one of the most important parts of my personal mission statement describes what my daily goal should be: complete as much as i can from my to do list. while i always have a list on my desk that tells me what work, academic and personal, i have to do, i sometimes push it aside by not thinking in the longterm. by focusing on my daily responsibilities in my personal mission statement, i hope to achieve better mental and physical health, as well as be able to live https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s in the momemnt more when i have free time. i was constantly thinking about memento mori from the week three qqc that brought about in a sense of urgency to finish my work so that i could live the life i want to before its too late. the quote, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” especially reminds me of that fact that all assignments have due dates as well. i cannot live so in the moment, i forget about how i want to achieve my goals. (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham, ny times-moreau fye week three) the last two paragraphs of my personal mission statement focus on my dedication to living a comfortable and enjoyable life in the long run. i remind myself of my duties as a student here at notre dame and the quality of work that position demands of me. i want to be able to look at my life as positively as possible, doing so requires me to realize that work cannot be viewed so negatively. especially at a catholic institution like notre dame, i frequently have to tell myself of how thankful i am for even being able to be a student. i was reminded of my quote from my week six qqc, “so as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope.” it reminded me that i should not take my lie as a student for granted and should appreciate everything it has to offer so that i can be proud of overcoming obstacles and enjoy all the non rigorous moments of college life. (5 minutes by aria swarr -moreau fye week six) a comfortable life also requires me to be truthful with myself. the last paragraph of my personal mission statement serves to motivate me to take life by the horns. how far i will fly in life is only truly dependent on one person: me. there is no excuse for not working hard enough to achieve your goals, and i know my mission statement will help me surpass even the goals i have today. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 integration two integration two a reflection on one semester at notre dame: encountering opportunities for balance, kindness, and hope a person’s first semester of college is a time of uncertainty, transition, and discovery. as this first semester starts to wind down, it presents the perfect time for reflection and to not only look back on what’s already happened, but also look ahead to what’s to come. as i contemplate the past several weeks, i can take note of the many things that i’ve experienced and the ways that i can move forward. my reflection can be summarized into three main encounters and how i can respond: (1) i’ve been presented with a significant amount of schoolwork but also a multitude of opportunities outside of class, so i need to work on striking a balance between academics and other activities; (2) i’ve found that i’m often in a position where i can help others, so i need to make more of an effort to be a good person; and (3) i’ve noticed that my own mindset can sometimes be discouraging and counterproductive, so i need to consciously be more positive with myself. one of the most important questions that i’ve asked myself numerous times throughout the semester has been, how can i balance my schoolwork with all the things i want to spend time on outside of class? i’ve encountered a significant workload from all my classes, but also unlimited opportunities to get involved outside of class, so the challenge for me has been finding a way to manage both. i think that one of the reasons it’s so difficult for me to sometimes shift my focus away from academics is because of the expectations i set for myself. julia hogan echoes this in her article when she writes, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough,” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). because of the expectations i have for myself, i devote a large portion of my time to academics so that i can live up to them. one of the things that i’ve done to effectively manage my time is planning ahead. i’ve created a list of all my assignments, and i also put the other events that i intend to go to on my calendar so i can see it all mapped out. in class we talked a lot about how assignments often come in cycles of weeks with very little to do and weeks with a lot to get done. we called these busy weeks “title waves”, but by planning ahead, we can recognize those title waves in advance and prepare for them. i also make an effort to participate in other events. for example, on tuesday and wednesday nights, i often go to quiz bowl meetings, but some weeks, i work on homework instead because it's a higher priority for me. later in the article referenced earlier, the author mentions how we should let go of expectations and instead just try to do our best. this is advice that i should definitely consider. if i didn’t have such high expectations for myself, i wouldn’t feel the need to spend so much time on schoolwork. even though being successful academically is important, it is also vital to have a well-rounded college experience. to respond to this, i plan on giving myself more time to do things unrelated to my classes. in the future, i’d like to be content with just doing my best and allow myself to take https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau advantage of all the opportunities i’m interested in. overall, something that i’ve encountered is the task of managing academics along with other activities, and i plan to respond to this by using my time efficiently, doing my best, and seeking a balanced college experience. throughout my time here, something that has increased in importance for me is being kind and accepting towards others. during these past few months, i’ve encountered countless opportunities to be a better person, whether it’s through taking the time to help someone or broadening my horizons to interact with those who are different from me. father jenkins described the need to make the most of these opportunities when he spoke about “the responsibility, and the training, and the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today — the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). as this excerpt implies, the problem of hate is one that is widespread, but as individuals we can do our part by fostering the acceptance of those around us. one of the things that we discussed in class was how important it is to expose yourself to a variety of perspectives and to learn about others’ experiences. to do this requires going outside of your comfort zone and taking the time to really get to know someone with a completely different background than you. as i meet people here from all over the country and across the world, i have the responsibility to be welcoming and willing to learn. through the end of this school year and into the future, i’d like to make connections with those who are different from me, whether it be in terms of academic interests, nationality, religion, or any other aspect of identity. in addition to being accepting, part of being a good person is helping others. parker j. palmer states that, “community is a gift” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). being a member of the notre dame community is something that i’m grateful for, and part of being a member of that community is doing what i can to give back. something that i’ve experienced is that people often send messages in our hall group chat asking if someone has an item they need to borrow, and even if i have the item, i take the attitude “someone else can help”. however, i’ve realized that this is not the right approach; receiving the gift of community also means being willing to give, so next time i’ll be sure to offer what i can. something that i have done to help my community is volunteer as a lector at my dorm masses. though this is a small act, it does play a role in helping our community function. in the future i would like to do more to help my community, perhaps by getting involved in volunteerism and service projects. i’ve quickly realized that being at notre dame means there are limitless opportunities to become a better person, and in order to continue to grow and develop, i plan to respond to these opportunities by learning about and accepting those who are different from me, and by actively seeking ways to help others and give back to my community. over the course of the semester, one of the things that has become more complicated for me has been my own mindset. during the first few weeks, my outlook was sort of one-dimensional; i simply sought to get as much work done as possible on a weekly basis. more recently, this has grown more complex as i find myself still aiming to be productive, but also feeling anxious and even pessimistic about the week ahead. in class, one of the concepts we discussed was imposter syndrome, which occurs when your own self-doubt makes you feel inadequate and causes you to act with less ambition because you “aren’t good enough”. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ although these aren’t really the types of feelings i’m having, the concept is similar because my negative thoughts can go on to affect my actions and mood. however, i recognize that the solution to my problem is to have hope and remember that everything is going to work out. in the screwtape letters, c. s. lewis writes, “our cause is never more in danger than when a human being, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (“the screwtape letters” by c. s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). using the context of the letters, the conclusion that can be drawn from this quote is that there is nothing more powerful than remaining hopeful even when there is no sign of hope to be found. in recent weeks, what i’ve been encountering is sort of this weekly cycle of dreading the week ahead to feeling positive by the end of the week, but then having those negative feelings again by sunday. some of the things i’ve done to mitigate this have been planning out everything that i need to accomplish in a given week and also following the routine that i’ve developed in terms of attending mass, eating meals, and going to clubs and other meetings. i can grow by maintaining a positive mindset and reminding myself to take things one day at a time. in summary, something that i’ve encountered here has been a negative outlook and mindset, but i can respond to that by maintaining hope, which shines even in the darkest of times. in conclusion, i can identify three main encounters i’ve had throughout the first semester, guided by my experiences and the moreau course content: (1) the need to balance academics with other activities; (2) the opportunity to be a better person; and (3) a sometimes negative and pessimistic mindset. each of these encounters requires a different response. to respond to the first one, i intend to manage my time effectively, be content with always doing my best, and seek a well-rounded college experience. to respond to the second one, i plan on making an effort to be accepting to those who are different from me and actively looking for chances to give back to my community. finally, to respond to the third one, i’d like to alter my outlook to be more positive by taking things day by day and remembering to never give up hope. this first semester has shown me that there will always be opportunities for growth and that i can identify those just by reflecting on my experiences. throughout the second semester and beyond, i plan to continue to grow and develop in an academic and social sense, as a member of the notre dame community, and within my own mind. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189463?module_item_id=106234 integration two integration two what have i encountered and how will i respond? the journey to change since i have arrived at notre dame, i have gone through many transformative experiences. i have learned a lot about myself and others. i’ve questioned my sense of belonging, grown in my faith, learned about the lives of others, and explored different ways to heal and deal with pain. all of these experiences share a common thread: change. i have changed a lot since i have been here, and i am grateful that i have evolved into a better version of myself as a result of my notre dame journey. one of the most important questions i’ve asked myself this semester is: do i belong here? moving across the country has admittedly been difficult. my biggest struggle has been making new friends. i started the semester with friends i met online. when we arrived on campus, though, they all made their own friends. i felt like the only one who was having trouble connecting with new people on campus. i didn’t (and honestly still don’t) really feel welcome in my residence hall—everyone seemed to have formed friend groups early, and i felt as if i had been left behind. now, however, i know i am not the only person who has felt this way. it is important to know that “loneliness is not failure, and that you are far from being alone in this feeling” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). many people here feel lonely: this is to be expected after leaving close friends behind and joining a new community. i don’t have many friends yet, but that is okay: it is only the first semester here. i know i will find my people eventually. feeling lonely does not mean that i do not belong here—i know that notre dame is where i am supposed to be, and i know i’ll find a community within it. additionally, i have also felt doubt in my place here due to expectations: those of others as well as my own. in class, we learned that “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by jolia hogan moreau fye week nine). i’ve experienced imposter syndrome since i have been here: i’m struggling in subjects that i did well in during highschool. getting lower grades after graduating at the top of my class has been difficult to accept. i feel as though i am not living up to expectations for my education, but this simply isn’t true. no one expects me to be a 4.0 student at a top 20 university; i realized that i was the only one putting this pressure on myself. it’s okay that i find my classes difficult: they are not supposed to be easy. getting a grade below an a in a class doesn’t mean i don’t belong here. i know i am smart, and i won’t let my own expectations make me doubt my place at notre dame. despite the struggles i have had since i’ve been here, i know that i belong at this university. throughout my notre dame journey, i have seen my faith grow stronger, and it has become much more important to me. throughout my middle and high school years, https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i was disconnected from my catholicism. two years ago, however, i reconnected with my faith, which has led me to notre dame. attending a university that values faith has led mine to grow. there are so many resources available to us to develop our religious beliefs. in the beginning of the semester, i opened an email from campus ministry that told people interested in becoming catholic or making confirmation to fill out a google form. i joined short course: a program dedicated to preparing students to make confirmation if they did not do so in middle or high school. this class has been instrumental in reconnecting me to my catholic faith. i have learned so much about my religion that i never knew. campus ministry says “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve). my faith has done this for me: i have learned so much about catholicism and christian perspective, which has led me to grow in mind, heart, and faith. the screwtape letters, additionally convey that “if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). while this source is satirical, it contains truth: as long as we have faith (even if we struggle and doubt), we grow with god. throughout my confirmation class, i have experienced highs and lows in my faith—i don’t agree with every belief the catholic church teaches, and this has been difficult for me to accept. even so, i know god is with me. while my faith has grown immensely overall, this has not been a strictly upward trend. however, god has been with me the whole way, and this allows me to think through my beliefs without abandoning them. throughout my time at notre dame, my faith has grown in both strength and importance, and this has made me a better version of myself. before arriving here, my perspective on the lives of others was immensely different. exposure to new people of different backgrounds has shown me that everyone’s experiences and struggles are unique and complicated. i live in a predominantly white town in northern new jersey. most people in my town are wealthy. this lack of diversity created a bubble—i wasn’t really exposed to people of different backgrounds. since coming here, however, i have not only learned about the importance of diversity, but i’ve felt it: i have met so many people with unique stories and have tried to learn as much as i can about places different from my hometown. i have learned that “exposure and access to different view points & life experiences offers insight and changes biases” (“diversity matters by agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). learning about the lives of others has broadened my perspective, and i am incredibly grateful for this change. while notre dame still can be considered a bubble of its own, it is much more diverse than my community at home, and this has taught me a lot about the world and other people. learning about diversity has also broadened my idea of what a community looks like. it is important to try and learn about others because “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness’” (“thirteen ways of looking https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189463?module_item_id=106234 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). in other words, we cannot form a community with hatred preventing us from connecting to each other. learning about the struggles of others here has increased my capacity for connectedness. while i still have so much to learn, i am glad that notre dame has sparked the beginning of this journey. throughout my time here, i have also learned that there are different ways to heal from pain we experience. recovery is not linear, and every person has a unique approach. since middle school, i have struggled with anxiety. i felt as if it impacted every part of my life, from my relationships to my physical health. since i arrived here, i have found that there are several ways to deal with my anxiety. my friend got me into weightlifting, and it has been life changing. lifting weights gives me a sense of control and an outlet for my anxiety. while it doesn’t remove it from my life, weightlifting helps me manage it. i never would have considered lifting weights before i met my friend here. there are so many different ways to heal and deal with pain. for example, we learned about women that heal through kintsugi, the japanese art of fixing pottery. their art is a reflection of themselves: “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). like this pottery, we can heal with time and the right support and outlets. this has become clear to me since i have arrived at notre dame. along with weightlifting, i also heal through my relationships with others. as stated by fr. jenkins, “faith can have a transforming effect on the world” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). while this can be true in reference to religious faith, i also see truth in the idea that having faith in yourself and others is transformative. love from others and their faith in me helps me deal with my anxiety. my best friend here at notre dame is so supportive and kind. even if we help only one person through support and faith, we are changing the world. my experiences at notre dame have shown me that there are so many ways to recover, and each person heals in unique ways. notre dame has inspired me to change for the better, and i love the person i am becoming as a result. i can’t wait to continue my journey here, evolving into who i am meant to be. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ integration one benjamin loyd 14 october 2021 moreau integration assignment one i am what i am i believe that stepping out of my comfort zone is one of the most difficult tasks i have to do day to day. throughout my childhood basically until the 6th grade i was always a funny and happy kid. i never worried about what happened in the past or what is going to happen in the future. i always focused on the now and paid little attention to anything outside of that. there was really never a comfort zone, i felt like i did things without even worrying about what was going to happen. then sitting in my room around december 31, 2015, i got the news that my parents were getting divorced. i had a feeling it was coming, but i just didn’t want to believe it. man was it tough. going from house to house. being at my dad’s on some weekend’s and my mom's on the others. it just felt so different. i began to be angry. angry at the situation. angry at my dad. angry at god. just angry. this made me think about the ted talk with brene brown and how she describes blame. she says, “blame is a way to discharge pain and discomfort.” that was exactly how i felt. i was feeling a lot of pain and discomfort and didn;t know how to go about it, so i began to blame others for things that were even my fault. don’t get me wrong, i was still a very joyful kid, but it took a notch down to some degree mentally at age eleven to twelve. then, boom, i experienced my first anxiety attack at church camp in the summer going into my 7th grade year. this changed everything for me. i remember the feeling like it was yesterday. the stomach pains, the dry mouth, the no appetite, the nausea, the feeling of being stuck trapped. i began to go to therapy for this and my temper, and eventually it “went away” a couple months after. in the david brooks ted talk he mentions the message that it is when you are fighting and wrestling with sin is when you have hit a point of character. i didn’t know what sin really was, i just knew it was bad. i feel like going to therapy built character for me because i showed some courage to try and fix my problems. i began just sleeping at my mom’s because she was my place of comfort my peace. referring to the “where i’m from” poem, i mentioned in my qqc, that “i am from a place of bad memories and good memories, pain and happiness, love and hate.” i dealt with all of these spectrums through this separation. many times i didn’t take into account my mom or dad's feelings. listening to one side of the story because i couldn’t bear my mom being sad and crying over the things my dad said. i was young, and didn’t know which side to choose, but now realizing there shouldn’t have been sides all along. this is where my second i believe statements come into play. i believe in second chances. nobody is perfect and everybody makes mistakes whether big or small. my dad’s big one came on that new years eve, where the judge gave us the option to just stay at my mom’s. i took it. i didn’t care how my dad felt, i was just looking for something to help cope with this change and i found it in the comfort of sports and home. sports made everything go away, the good and the bad. i used to dream about having mlb and nba dreams to buy my mom and dad a house and make tons of money, so we can all be happy separate or together. i used to see my parents both struggle with money issues because of all the new bills. i had to make it out of my city, so i could help them. i was a “desired creature” (mentioned in the ny times article by david brooks) that was full of passion in sports, so that i could help my parents out in some way. everything was starting to turn into a routine by the time i was in eighth grade and fourteen. i played for a high level travel baseball team and played for a basketball program that fed into our highschool. then like my story has happened, something happened that changed my life until this day. i began dating a girl my eighth grade spring. i was experiencing young “love” and the feeling of being wanted by someone outside of my family. the most unstable, but stable relationship basically until the summer of 2021. she changed my life. i fell in love when i didn’t even know what love was. now i question if it was love or manipulation. which comes to my third “i believe” statement. i believe that everything happens for a reason and that god ultimately controls everything. looking back on it now, i don’t know if i would have hopped into that relationship with the knowledge i have now. relationships can be hard and it is filled with ups and downs, anxiety and comfort, depression and happiness, every feeling at such a young age and not knowing how to cope. it was a roller coaster on my heart and brain. we started dating, broke up, dating again, broke up, talking, broke up, friends, enemies, friends, enemies for 4-5 years straight. it took a toll and still does to this day. reading the article from week four by olivia t. taylor, “5 signs you're in a toxic friendship”, refreshes my memory about her relationship with me. it mentions in the article, that “nothing feels worse than being used in any relationship.” i felt this heavily. basically for the last two years i have been being used as a plan b and a source of comfort despite my feelings. she manipulated me because of my good heart, which ultimately taught me to know my worth. i am now at one of the most prestigious universities in the world. i am blessed and grateful to be here for however long i am here. god is the only one that knows. the article “faith brings light to a dark world” explains, “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god.” this is what i have been trying to do here at notre dame. to learn to trust god and have hope for better days. my time here at notre dame has honestly been a constant struggle. from the first couple days of not eating because of my anxiety to these last days of midterms before fall break. i have basically experienced every feeling. in the beginning of my time here i was afraid. afraid of the pressure. afraid to build relationships. afraid of how people view me. i was almost convinced that i would be back home in a couple days because i felt lonely, depressed, and full of anxiety. through the resources of the gld center and others it begins to get better. i am beginning to try and start to have a new mindset with “negative” and “bad” thoughts that make my mind worry and cloudy. my time here has been full of challenges, but as carla harris mentioned in her graduation speech, to “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson, a lesson that may be one of the most important things you learn for that season in your life.” citations: (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one) (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grotto, moreau fye week three) (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four) (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five) (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) (“"how to destroy truth” by david brooks, ny times moreau fye week seven) additional thoughts/drafts: i believe that one day everything will be alright. my peace of mind will be fruitful. my heart full of joy and love. this is the part where i want to reflect on what i have said and how i can gain from these experiences. i am a child of god. i am chosen by god. i am what i am. throughout my life, i have always tried to chase perfection. i have made so many mistakes in my life that i can’t even count how many. some not so bad, some bad, and some terrible. the one thing i have been trying to work on is nonjudgement. i’ve been asking these negative questions like “why would i think this?” or “why would i do this”. which led me to cause worry and extreme anxiety into my life. unjudging myself is being patient with my thoughts and actions. to learn from my mistakes and to change for the better and for god. i believe that my purpose on this earth is to spread the word and love of the gospel and to preach jesus’ teachings throughout my passions on earth. the world needs more love, not hate. more jesus, less idols. god loves everyone, no matter how far you stray away from the ninety-nine. live https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare with love like jesus did. live with fearlessness, knowing god is going to lead you to a beautiful life. live with few worries because god is your refuge. live your life because at the end of the day you are who you are. instructor brian reaume moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 using beliefs to better myself in anticipation of attending notre dame, i knew that my coming here would challenge me in a way that i wouldn’t experience at another university. not only would my knowledge of content be put to the test, i would also have to confront my beliefs about what a meaningful life entails, whether or not there is a god, and how i can incite positive change in my community. i soon learned that delineating my beliefs is a lot harder than simply making a list; instead, beliefs are multifaceted, and i have to trace my beliefs back to their roots to really understand what they are. in my pursuit of identifying my beliefs, i realized the importance of cultivating beliefs substantiated by truth. i have maintained this thought for as long as i can remember, but it was really solidified as my core friend group in high school became closer. additionally, my time in moreau has aided me in identifying how i pursued truth in my experiences. my closest group of friends represented a number of nationalities: indian, pakistani, chinese, korean, and rwandan. having been exposed to peers with diverse backgrounds has led me to realize that any preconception i once had about their culture or lifestyle was severely limited. this realization aligns exactly with the point chimamanda ngozi adichie makes in her ted talk, in which we only know the “single story” about those who we think are different from us, and more often than not, that single story is negative (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). essentially, i have tried to keep this shortcoming in mind while meeting people at notre dame--at first, there’s a lot more that i don’t know about someone than i do know. thus, it has been my goal to talk to a diverse group of people and engage in conversation so that i gain exposure to more than just a single story. this has allowed me to identify various perspectives and always strive to pursue truth. in addition to working to pursue truth, i also believe that it is important to be truthful with myself and never try to be someone that i’m not. in order to achieve this, i have been searching for a better understanding of who i am. to me, this is important because it will help me to better recognize the progress i have made, make note of any shortcomings that i have, and ultimately strive to be a better person. simply knowing myself is easier said than done, but i thought the exercise from week 6 did a good job facilitating that search for identity. in an effort to emulate george ella lyon’s “where i’m from” poem, in which he begins with “i am from clothespins,” i have written some statements of my own in order to identify where i think i’m from (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). after having been at notre dame for half of a semester, i would say that i am from pangborn, a dorm with primarily freshmen that has allowed me to make some of the best friends i’ll ever have; mendoza, a college that has an abundance of opportunities and has supported me wonderfully so far; and a longboard that has carried me to every end of campus. i think it’s important to list defining roots like that so i can always reflect and identify the primary influences in my life. although, telling stories about myself and hearing others’ stories has also paved the way for my growth. in week 5, i read about the ways in which stories shape my journey, and a quote by carla harris that stuck out to me was, “pay attention to things as they happen to you, for when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). to me, this emphasizes the importance of taking note of events in my life so that i am better prepared for adversity in the future. this strategy was particularly helpful when i began getting sick after coming here, which i soon realized was because i was staying up too late to either do some work or socialize. my lack of sleep significantly set me back, but learning from that experience helped me immensely. ultimately, i feel that i have learned so much about myself since coming to notre dame, whether that was facilitated by listing my roots or telling stories about my experiences here. as i continue with my studies, i hope to always strive to not live life on autopilot but instead take it slow and continually reflect. one belief that i feel particularly strong about is the idea that i can forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable and showing understanding to my peers. in week 1, our moreau discussions were centered around the ways in which courage, vulnerability, and belonging can be a part of our search, and the concept of vulnerability struck a chord in me. being vulnerable was never really discussed in high school or earlier on, so the idea that i should intentionally be open and allow others to come into my life made sense to me. in doing so, some positive unintended results can emerge: “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this was shared by brené brown in her ted talk, and i think it wonderfully illustrates how being open with others can lead to a sense that someone deserves love and belonging. vulnerability has played a big role in my notre dame experience so far, as i had to lean on some friends after going through a tough situation recently. if i had not opened up to them, i would have bottled up my emotions, which would have been detrimental if held for too long--their support and reassurance helped me to see that everything would be okay. likewise, it’s important that i give others the space to be vulnerable around me as well. relationships should be reciprocative, which was explained well by the healthy vs. unhealthy relationships table in week 4: “partners treat each other like they want to be treated and accept each other’s opinions, friends, and interests. they listen to each other” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). the most important piece of that quote is “they listen to each other” because the best way to show someone you care is to simply give them your attention and be there for them. for someone to be vulnerable, there must be someone on the other end willing to listen. i haven’t always seen the importance of vulnerability--for a long time, the connotation i associated with it was weakness. however, after learning about it in moreau and practicing it here, i strongly believe that vulnerability is essential to a strong relationship. going forward, i hope to continue to indicate to others that i’m someone they can be vulnerable to. lastly, i believe that outward success isn’t as important as inner success. i have found that in college nearly everyone around me has huge aspirations; while i was expecting to find that here, there is a clear distinction between the levels of motivation of people in high school compared to college. due to this pressure, i find myself comparing my accomplishments to those around me, hoping to stay ahead of the “competition.” yet, i also find this mindset incredibly dumb. when all i think about is success in classes, clubs, and internships, i neglect my inner well-being, which is where i should really hope to find success. in father pete’s video from week 3, he said, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). this eloquently describes the previously described realization i have had. at the end of my life, i don’t think i will care about accomplishments on my resume as much as i care about being content with the person i became. just like outward accomplishments, i found that i have to actively work for inner accomplishments too, a process that can be described by the following quote: “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). as stated before, finding inner peace requires addressing the “sins” i commit. for me, i feel that i regularly lose sight of what is truly important, which i would say is my friends and family. moreover, i don’t show them my love and appreciation often enough. i am so appreciative of the friends i have made at notre dame, but i am not certain that i have indicated that well enough. to me, that’s my biggest sin. however, i am excited for future opportunities to show those around me that i care. consequently, i believe that i will become closer to achieving greater inner success. after spending almost two months at notre dame, i have had a lot of time to evaluate my beliefs, especially through the moreau course. consequently, i would say that i have solidified a handful of beliefs in relation to vulnerability, success, truth, and perspectives. i hope to continue to exhaust the resources here to further work on self-development. integration 1 determination above all else root belief 1: i believe that my hunger for knowledge is insatiable knowledge is a central part of my life. throughout my years, the search for new fun facts, scientific beliefs, and even meanings behind art has entranced me. i am fascinated by learning, and my interests show this as well. my hobbies include fishing and working out, and i spend many hours a week studying new techniques or my own technique in order to always improve. i can never be satisfied with the knowledge i already possess, and thus i intend on utilizing my time as wisely as i can. carla harris’s quote, “we can never get more time,” truly resonated with me in my own life (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). in my early life, much of my time was spent doing nothing. i always would sit around, waiting for something to be told to me, without trying to learn things myself. as i matured, i slowly realized seeking knowledge is the only way to feed this hunger for knowledge, and with this newfound realization i slowly began to read more and more. once i had access to the internet, my free time became enveloped by the growth of my own knowledge on anything. i include that knowledge is not necessarily academic. i consider the perspectives of others as knowledge too. in my time at notre dame, i have been shown the importance of seeking the perspectives of others not only through conversations in classes, such as the moreau fye, but also through a ted talk from adichie (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). she mentions the “danger of a single story” not only in her title of the talk, but also how it affected her experiences as a writer coming to america and the implicit bias sent against her due to the minimal knowledge of africa that americans learn. many people in my life, at notre dame as well as in my life before college, have come from a variety of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story#t-629136 backgrounds and experiences. learning these experiences and their beliefs is just as invaluable a knowledge as book knowledge to me, and thus i seek it as often as i can. thus, knowledge is something i am always “hungry” for. root belief 2: i believe that my mistakes fuel my personal growth since the dawn of connor, i have always been a perfectionist. mistakes were never simply mistakes, they were blemishes to my character that i felt were personal faults. i miss a goal in soccer? i must be terrible at athletics. i lose a point on a quiz? i must be stupid. these thoughts invaded my consciousness for the longest time. however, as i matured, i came to realize that perfection, although it requires a lack of blemishes, can only be attained through the knowledge of said blemishes. experience is the best way to learn, which is how this became a core belief of mine. fr.pete’s analogy of the knot best demonstrated this to me. he mentions how “every knot is unique” in reference to how every mistake or hiccup in your life is going to be a unique experience, and i take this to mean that every knot is a new learning experience (“the role of faith in our story” fr. pete mccormick, moreau fye week three). a core scientific principle is that growth occurs only through stimulation, and i believe that the stimulation for personal growth and betterment is through mistakes now. a quote that also resonates with the idea of growing through mistakes was found in david brooks’ ted talk. he mentions that “out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed,” (“should you live for your resume … or your eulogy?” david brooks, moreau fye week two). this quote meant a lot to me, because personally i feel that the start of college has included a large amount of suffering in classes that i am not used to. everyone says college is where you mature and self-realize your potential, and i am starting to believe that it is because of the mistakes and suffering that you https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim endure while following your dreams in college. overall, both quotes demonstrate the idea of suffering and mistakes stimulating growth. a third example of this was found in the text on toxic friendships (“five signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia taylor, moreau fye week four). it mentioned that one sign was that “they don’t really listen to you”, which is a sign that i often ignore, giving others the benefit of the doubt . this has always been a mistake, and the main lesson i learn every time is that i should not be friends with others who parasitize the relationship to treat me like a “wall” of sorts that they can throw their frustrations at. i love hearing anything and everything about someone, but relationships must go both ways, which has taken me a long time to learn. especially because when it used to happen, i had doubts about my own mistakes, thinking they were not valid or good enough. over time, and even in my new college friendships, i have learned that a true friend will make every problem seem valid. mistakes truly fuel my growth. root belief 3: i believe in self-confidence being the source of my success the quality of being shy was something attributed to me from a very young age. although i don’t particularly believe i was born shy, i definitely believe that my own lack of self realization made confidence difficult for the majority of my life. everyone in middle school had some “calling” it seemed (later i would come to realize that this was not the case), and i believed that my lack of one was a problem. however, i eventually realized that simply diving into conversations, interests, and other ideas lead to my discovering of friendships, relationships, subjects of interest, and more. in my poem, i referenced how i am from “ever-fluctuating interests and curiosity”, which i believe is very true to my character (“where i’m from” connor mccloskey, moreau week six). while i enjoy consistency, i do not enjoy being tied to https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1e3g01zyusokfwn3uvpxlszk94myp4t1gm7fhdbfgbvi/edit something i do not enjoy. i would much rather explore interests and decide on one after than decide immediately on something, only to change it to a new long-term interest, only to change it again, and again, and again until i have wasted so much time changing interests that i no longer have time to dive deep into one. this includes my new friendships at notre dame as well as my subjects of interest. i never want to restrict myself in my life, and i believe that self-confidence in one’s abilities allows them to know that they can do the changes that i discussed above. this same self-confidence is not only used to reinforce exploration in my life, but to also reassure myself in times of weakness. brené brown said it best when she said that “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe that they are worthy of love and belonging,” (“the power of vulnerability” brené brown, moreau fye week one). i have always thought that believing in oneself promotes self-success, because if you don’t believe that you can do something, how will you? self-confidence breeds success in not only my life, but it is a fundamental root of all success. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 microsoft word integration one.docx how i treat people, determine truth, and grow people have many reasons for doing things. people do things because they make them happy, the do things because they were told to, they do things because they think it’s the right thing to do, and a myriad of other reasons. however, there are things that influence almost every decision a person makes and that is a person’s root beliefs. a person’s root beliefs are what tell them what their priorities should be and what choices they should make. for example, a person who thinks being vulnerable is really important, such as brené brown, could have a core belief of “i believe i grow by being vulnerable.” which would then tell them that it should be a priority for them to be vulnerable and they would make decisions that lead them to that. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) for me i have three root beliefs. the first is that i believe that people should be treated kindly. the second is that i believe that i pursue truth through reason. finally, the third is that i believe i grow by learning from my actions. my first root belief is that i believe that people should be treated kindly. this isn’t exactly the most original root belief, but i think i can provide unique commentary on it. with regards to where this belief comes from for me, it comes from a couple places. the first place it comes from is my morals because i believe it would be morally wrong to not at least try to be kind to everyone. the second place is my experiences with kindness and a lack thereof. i’ve met a lot of people throughout my life and had to make new friends very often because of how much i moved. many of the people i met were kind to me and were good friends to me but, there were also times where people didn’t extend any form of kindness towards me despite my efforts to be kind towards them. like we learned in week 4, it hurts to be in unhealthy relationships but, while i was in these relationships i did at least learn to be kind to everyone so i don’t make other people feel the way i did. ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) this root belief influences how i interact with people by making me try to be kind to everyone i meet. my second is that i believe that i pursue truth through reason. with the origins of this belief, i can draw from the where i’m from poems from week 5 because this comes from my upbringing and how my parents raised me. ("where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week five) my parents have always told me that truth is found through facts and reason and without them you can’t find the truth. there have actually been multiple weeks in the course where the content has been related to this belief. in week 7 we covered implicit bias and how to try and not fall into our biases which is very heavily linked to my belief because reason and facts are the best way to overcome those biases. (“how to think about 'implicit bias' by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven) there was also a correlation between the class content and my belief in week 6 when fr. grove talked about the two notre dames and how both faith and reason together are important. (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week six) the interesting thing though is that fr. grove’s message is actually in contrast with my belief. fr. grove says that faith and reason need to work together to achieve things but, my belief compels me to say that reason is the only thing necessary, especially when it comes to the discovery of truth. albert einstein didn’t use faith to discover his equation for energy, juries don’t use faith to determine guilt or innocence, buildings aren’t erected because of faith. faith, more often than not, gets in the way of reason which is why my belief is that it is just reason that determines truth and not reason and faith. my third is that i believe i grow by learning from my actions. in week 2 we took the character strength survey. (“via character strengths survey” by via adult survey moreau fye week two) this was important to my belief because knowing what your strengths and weaknesses are is a good way to know what you need to do to grow. typically, though, you will discover these things through your actions. if you take a math class and do poorly it will not be fun, but you could come out of it learning that you need to grow as a student. if you lose a race to a friend, you could learn you need to get out and exercise more. another thing is you could have a strenuous relationship with a family member, and you learn that you need to work on your social/relationship skills. in week 3 we learned about how notre dame students grew in their relationships with people once they found faith which shows that my belief is good because they learned from their actions that they had room to grow, they grew through their faith, and ended up fixing the thing that led them to want to grow. (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry moreau fye week three) root beliefs are important. they shape how people make decisions and determine their priorities. without our root beliefs we wouldn’t be able to make important decisions about our lives. for me, those ever-important root beliefs that shape my decisions, priorities, and life in general, are “i believe that people should be treated kindly”, “i believe that i pursue truth through reason”, and “i believe i grow by learning from my actions”. integration one disconnection with self i believe that i am searching for a full understanding of myself. i don’t truly feel like i know exactly who i am. before coming to notre dame, i thought that i knew who i was. i have since realized that i only knew who i was in the context of a small town with friends i’ve had since childhood, and one real goal -going to college and starting a new chapter of my life. i only really knew who i was based on where i was from, not based on where i was going. it was easy for me to write poetically about the things that make up who i am -family, ethnicity, childhood (moreau fye week six). but it is extremely hard to think about myself as a product of the real world. upon leaving the comfort of my hometown, my knowledge of myself has almost completely reset. i am now immersed in such a new and different place, full of a tremendous amount of personal responsibility and academic rigor. i feel out of place with my own existence, simply going through the motions. i am aware of how pessimistic this sounds, but i do have a generally positive outlook on my whole situation. this outlook can be defined by the following quote: “in order to fulfill yourself you have to forget yourself. in order to find yourself you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” by david brooks’ moreau fye week two). weakness and feeling lost builds genuinity. i’ve dealt with issues in the past where i feel like i have begun to build genuinity, understanding what is important to me and what truly matters. i do thoroughly believe that i will be created not by my good moments, but instead ones of shame. accepting my current state of confusion and dissociation is important for my development as a person. i do wonder though: will i only become my most authentic self when i reach my lowest point? how will i deal with being at my lowest? or does every small moment of https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim shame add up to create my most authentic self? when can i be sure that i have become who i truly want to be? regardless, my current plan of action is to just be with myself; just exist without knowing who i really am. this requires extreme vulnerability, something we covered in the early parts of class. i need to be okay with the fact that nothing positive comes without something negative. brene brown said that “when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). experiences that are so close in nature, but so far in emotion -connect and disconnect, belonging and exclusion, love and heartbreak -generally come hand and hand. we will not truly know or understand one without the other, and to do so requires extreme vulnerability. this is something that i do not feel daunted by. i have always been a vulnerable person, and inspired vulnerability around me as well. my instinct in this situation is to turn to faith, but i don’t feel secure with my relationship with god at all. at notre dame, i see people around me that seem to have beautiful relationships with god. while i am told to “resist the temptation to compare yourself against what others profess to know and believe” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick moreau fye week three), i find myself doing the following: constantly contemplating the faith of others and how it impacts their lives; assuming, yes, that they themselves have it all figured out; comparing my own beliefs and my own relationship with god to those around me. and in doing so, i don’t feel adequate. i am on a slow journey with faith, and right now i am not at a point where i can utilize my faith to remedy my disconnect with self. additionally, when you feel disconnected with yourself, it is hard to feel connected with others. i feel alone in my endeavors, and to a great extent, i think that this is a product of single stories. “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our https://youtu.be/x4qm9cgrub0 https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” (“the danger of a single story” adichie moreau fye week seven). single stories do not allow for full understanding of groups of people, and leads to the creation of stereotypes. i must be intentional in working to believe that i am not alone in my feelings. we are much more similar than we are different, and while i am completely aware of that when it comes to race, gender identity, ethnicity, etc., i must also convince myself that we are much more similar than we are different when it comes to mental health and dealing with feelings of uncertainty. great difficulty comes with the idea that it is not realistic for me to say that i will wake up one day and know exactly who i am. i will not turn a corner and fully understand myself. i have to endure tough times in order to build up a persona where i eventually feel secure with my self-knowledge. this idea is frightening. it scares me to think that i am not just in limbo, but in a semi-permanent state of uncertainty. carla harris, stated that “fear has no place in your success equation… anytime you approach anything in your life from a position of fear, you will always underpenetrate that opportunity” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address”, carla harris moreau fye week five). i believe that to some extent, i am approaching this situation with a position of fear. it does not feel comfortable to be lost. while fear might be inhibiting my quality of life currently, it also serves as an indication of the fact that i am in a position of growth. fear is indicative of ambition. in my case, it is the ambition to succeed in knowing myself. my biggest hope is that i can soon feel sure of my own existence. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/details https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 my notre dame experience the most important question i have asked while at notre dame is, “what should i do with my life?” when i was very young, i thought i was going to get married, and i always had the desire to get married and raise a family. however, since 5th grade i have thought about a vocation and felt called to the priesthood. when i was younger, i was always trying to get god to prove to me that he existed through ridiculous requests and prayers and hoping that i would have some great vision. in 5th grade, i realized that there was no reason why god should reveal himself to me. i realized that i was not some great person or some hero or biblical figure who deserved any sort of vision, and that i just had to have faith. around this same time, while staring at the tabernacle at my school mass, i heard, “carl, i want you to become a priest.” it was exactly the opposite of what i wanted to hear. in middle and high school, i ran away from god because i was afraid of that call. i realized something was wrong with my life my junior year of high school and tried to turn things around. by the end of my senior year, i had reconciled my relationship with god, and was actively considering becoming a priest. i had recently been praying the rosary a lot, although i hadn’t been talking to jesus. at my senior kairos retreat, after i apologized to jesus, i stared at a picture of him and heard, “my mother has told me so much about you, and what you have done. you are everything i’ve ever wanted, and i will give you many graces for your generous yes.” now of course there is the question of whether in both of these cases what i heard was really god, but i’ve thought a lot about it and it seems unlikely that it wasn’t. i had expressed a sentiment to my freshman theology teacher that i think still rings true: all of the superficial ways we try to fix the world are ultimately like trying to put a band aid over a deep and open wound, but if people simply knew christ and followed him, the world would be a lot better. i think this is captured well in a quote by one of my role models bishop fulton j. sheen: “unless souls are saved, nothing is saved; there can be no world peace unless there is soul peace. world wars are only projections of the conflicts waged inside the souls of men and women, for nothing happens in the external world that has not first happened within a soul.” bishop fulton j. sheen was an american bishop in new york from 1950s to 1970s and had his own wildly popular tv show on nbc called “life is worth living.” so, from all of this, i even began to see the appeal in becoming a priest, especially if i wanted to help the church and the world. before i got to notre dame, i set myself on the idea that i would be a priest. i had no idea what the next four years would hold for me or what my major would be, etc. my parents told me not to date until college, and i had been in several relationships (non-dating) in middle and high school which didn’t really end well. my senior year i decided that i had had enough of pseudodating people, especially as i began to think more about becoming a priest. this past summer i was thinking a lot about my relationship with god and about how i would proceed with my life, but the thought of dating never crossed my mind. my first day here, i met a girl named meg at band camp before school started, and she was the only person whose name i could remember by the end of the first day. in a journal entry i wrote that day, i described her as, “really nice, helpful, funny welcoming, just really great.” a lot happened in two weeks, and it was not only clear to me, but pretty clear to everyone else that we liked each other. so, i considered dating her, but wondered how i possibly could with this call i felt to the priesthood. i was out to lunch with my parents who came to visit that weekend, and i told them about her and talked about asking her out and they were really happy about it. so, i asked her out the next day and she said yes. one of the first things i told her was that i was considering becoming a priest because i wanted to be upfront about, especially entering into a relationship. so, i thought a lot over the last three months about this question. i felt everything from guilt, to confusion, to despair around this question. that’s not to say life was misery. the last few months have been some of the best of my life, and i didn’t let it get me down. one of the promises that i made to myself before i asked meg out was that i was going to be the best possible boyfriend i could possibly be and also deepen my relationship with god at the same time. the training to analyze arguments in philosophy class this semester helped me to break down the arguments, that i had in my head for getting married versus being ordained, into individual premises. that helped me to realize that any reason for or against one or the other that was based in fear was unreasonable. for example, i had feared for a while that being a priest might be boring, but i realized that if god had a job for me to do, even if it was boring, it would be good. however, even after i had realized this, i still feared being bored in marriage and having some mundane job. but i realized that if i could offer up my mundane work to god as a priest, i could also in marriage. there was no reason to fear boredom on either side of my vocation. so many events and classes and interactions helped me figure out so much. i went to the talk by patricia talbot about her vision of mary and learned about the value of time and the value of the eucharist in my daily life. i went to a talk “dating under the dome” which was a panel on marriage as a vocation. one of my most important realizations occurred at this panel. one of the panelists said, “if you have this deep desire in your heart, god put it there for a reason. taking up a cross in a vocation doesn’t mean denying that desire. that desire is a step in the right direction.” i also realized that the desire to serve christ and others was not incompatible with marriage. i had also talked to fr. pete and vocalized this realization: whatever god is calling me to do, there is a reason for what has happened and what is happening. if i’m supposed to be a priest, there is something in these relationships that will help me be a better priest. if i’m supposed to get married, then considering the priesthood will help me in some way be a better husband and a better father. still the question was in my mind, how could i choose something other than the priesthood if god explicitly told me that he wanted me to be a priest. i’m not sure if this is right, but it seems a possible explanation. i may not be meant to be a priest. i might never have been meant to be a priest. but god calling me in that direction drastically changed my life and my view of the world and drew me closer to him. to me, it is not unreasonable to say that the reason for that call was to gain the benefits and closeness that god desired. and looking back, when i heard “i will give you many graces for your generous yes,” it may not have been a “yes” to the priesthood, but a “yes” to god and what he puts in front of me. i also see a parallel between the first time god spoke to me and my vocational call. i asked and asked and asked god to prove that he existed, and right when i accept that there is no reason to see any signs and that i will not get one, god gives me a sign. in the same way, after hearing him, i begged and begged and begged not to become a priest, but when i finally considered it and accepted the possibility of what god might have planned, god puts me next to an amazing girl on the first day of band camp. all this is to say that this is all one giant lesson in humility and trust in god. i think in the beginning of the semester i was looking for a place to fit in and trying to evaluate my own worth. “since it’s tough to really know how hard our peers work, how difficult they find certain tasks, or how much they doubt themselves, there’s no easy way to dismiss feelings that we’re less capable than the people around us.” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week 9). one of the things that was comforting to realize at a catholic university was that there are many people considering being priests, and just the outlook on life that i have, going to mass daily, and participating in catholic life on campus just attracts those people. so, i’ve met several others, and though i haven’t talked about it much it has been a great comfort. “if i am confident in my beliefs, and i have love and good will for the other side, then it would be my duty to try to persuade them. and if i want to persuade them, then how can i vilify them? people are not persuaded by those who attack their character” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). i think that this sentiment has been integral in my relationships at notre dame. i am confident in my beliefs and my values, and i still love the people that disagree with me. as jenkins says, if i love the other side, then it would be my duty to try to persuade them. on many occasions i have reached out to invite a friend to mass or to something that would help expand their horizons, but i could always do more. one area i could particularly improve upon is respectfully speaking up when someone disagrees with me and faces no opposition, especially when there is a fundamental misunderstanding of the other side. “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“13 ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week 11). when i arrived at notre dame, i was welcomed into the band family, the smaller clarinet family, and the family of my friend group. i have appreciated the willingness of people to reach out. i thought to myself the other day, those people are the best friends because they don’t simply walk by but recognize me as a person. i realized that this was something that i should do more often. i received the gift of community and family from others. we had a night where the clarinets sat outside at dusk and we talked about the first week. i thanked everyone, and said, “i just hope that there is someway that i can repay you all.” the response i got was to pay it forward, that when the seniors leave, the rest of us inherit responsibility for welcoming the new freshman into the community. “and if only the will to walk is really there, he is pleased even with their stumbles” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week 12). this line expresses my hope that i’ve had, with all the discerning i’ve been doing. much like the thomas merton prayer read in moreau, i have no idea what i am doing, but i know that the desire to please god does in fact please him. now, i could be wrong about everything i have written in this essay (i also greatly oversimplified my story in order to make it a somewhat reasonable length). maybe i never heard god, or maybe it’s unreasonable to think that god would ever tell me something as a means to an end. and i am okay that i could be wrong. i trust god that whatever happens, it will be what is supposed to happen. i don’t know whether i’m supposed to get married, but i know that i can. and depending on how my relationship with meg goes, maybe i will find out that answer. there is still a lot more to understand about god, about dating, about life, but i have already learned so much here at notre dame. what i’ve learned is priceless, and somehow even more valuable has just been the time i’ve spent, the experiences i’ve had, and the people i’ve met here. integration 1 prof. todd taylor moreau fye integration 1 15 october 2021 throughout everyone’s life, mine included of course, there are certain situations, actions, or reactions that form one's core beliefs and core values as a human. it is important to be able to identify these values, know how they affect your life, and know where you developed these values from. many of my core beliefs are based on experiences i have had in my life, some tragic, some triumphant. while i wish that some of my values were formed in different ways, i know that my past life experiences are why i became who i am today. in this paper i will touch on what some of my values are, how they have been formed in me and how they affect me today. first, i believe that in order to form good relationships with people i must show vulnerability. this first belief is one i didn’t necessarily think about until the first week of moreau. in the first week we watched a video titled “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown. this video particularly resonated with me due to this quote, “people that have a strong sense of belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging.”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe the quote sums up vulnerability perfectly. it talks about how a person needs to think they are worthy of others attention. in order to be worthy a person must sacrifice something, which is a huge part of vulnerability. a sacrifice shows that someone is truly vulnerable and truly wants a connection. i think this value was built through my connections with my friends at home. when i was in highschool one of my best friends died of cancer and everyone in my grade came together to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be support one another. vulnerability was at an all time high during this sad time and caused everyone to see new sides of the people they were closest to. while the circumstances were terrible i know that i wouldn’t be nearly as close to all my friends back home if it weren’t for the vulnerability we shared at that time. second, i believe that in order to truly find yourself you must believe in something bigger than yourself. the way i see it, any person can chase the next paycheck or the next worldly thing, but in order to find yourself and truly be happy a person must focus on finding a good feeling or moral goal. the focus should not be on worldly things, but on things that make your soul and the world feel good. the main focus for week 2 of moreau was whether one should live their lives by a resume vs. eulogy (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i think it is important to know that everyone deep down wants to live a life so people remember them in a good light, but that’s tough to do. that’s why i think it is important to believe in something bigger than yourself. if a person has a bigger goal in life then it makes it a lot easier to not focus selfishly on worldly things, but expand their sphere of positive influence. i learned alot about this whenever i am working with a team, whether athletic or for a group project. the best work and effort of people comes out when others are depending on you. when people are vulnerable and you know their happiness depends on you then you can achieve great things and be a better person because of it. if people can do that in every aspect of their lives then there is no telling how people will feel and what they will accomplish. third, the experiences one has had in their life affect their narrative, never be too quick to judge someone when you don't know their story. no one has the same story, absolutely no one. even if people look alike, talk alike or live alike they are still all different. this knowledge is https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim essential for being a just person in this world. it is commonplace for all people, myself included, to pass judgement far too quickly on people, whether it be because of how they look or what they say. this unfair judgement is many times unavoidable because it is how our brain works. “it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by payne, niemi, doris moreau fye week seven). the most important thing is to be aware of this overgeneralization so a person can counteract it. in my experience judgement can interfere with great friendships and impede progress. some of my best friends back home are from a neighboring rival town, and when i was in middle school i would refuse to interact with them because i hated them for no reason. but then in my junior year of high school my cousin started to date a person from a different town and they have become my best friends and have helped me excel in life. when i first met them they instantly became my friends. we started training for track together and i can confidently say that these unlikely friends contributed greatly to my success on the track my senior year. these are friends i never would have had if i stuck to my preconceived notions of them, but after meeting them they are some of the best people i know. i almost never gave them a chance because i was so stubborn in my judgement. the most important thing about my core beliefs is that i feel they make me a more complete person. without these core beliefs there would be something missing in my life. whether it be the ability to truly help the world around me, or the close relationships i have formed with my friends; none of it would come to fruition without my core beliefs as a foundation. one of the most interesting things about core beliefs is that many times they are subconscious before anyone realizes they are there. as i look back at my life i see that many of the things i do in my life, many of the ways i act, are represented in these first 7 weeks of https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ moreau. from how i try to relate to people to how i act when no one is watching it all is because of the core beliefs instilled in me. the coolest thing to think about is not necessarily how someone’s beliefs have affected their past, it's how their beliefs will affect their future. this is only magnified once people can identify what they can and should believe, causing an even greater impact on the future. integration one i believe that, at my current point in life, i am searching for who i am. up until this point in my life, i feel like i have just been living for the next stage or chapter of my life. for the majority of what i can remember, the next stage has always been college. in middle school and high school, i shaped my interests around what i thought would help me get into a good college. i joined clubs that i thought would look good on applications, clubs like student government, national honor society and the math team. i took up new sports, playing tennis, track and hockey so that i would be playing a sport every season during high school. i focused my efforts in school on classes i thought would look the best, taking ap and ib classes focusing on stem classes. i did all of these things because i thought they would make me look better to a college. eventually, these activities became the things that i enjoyed doing and they became a large part of who i was in high school. now that i made it into the next chapter of my life, college, i no longer have to worry about looking good to a college admissions office. this has caused me to begin to reflect on the reasoning behind why i did those activities in high school. if i only did them to get into college, i wouldn’t have any reason to continue doing them in college. david brooks discusses this topic in his talk, should you live for your resume or your eulogy?, where he breaks down the two inter natures that guide our decision making process, our external and internal natures. he says that our external nature is driven by an economic logic, while our internal logic is driven by a moral logic. he also mentions that we are often in a state of struggle between these two natures when we try to make decisions (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two). while i was reflecting on what i chose to spend my time doing in high school, i realized that my external nature was heavily influencing my decisions. i started doing those activities to get into a good college rather than because they were things that i was actually interested in. this realization caused me to begin to doubt myself. i didn’t know if i enjoyed doing those things because i actually enjoyed them or because i had taught myself to enjoy them since i was spending so much time doing them. this imposter syndrome was something that i had faced when i went through the college application process. i found myself doubting if i was actually good enough to get into the schools i was applying to. i was putting a lot of stress upon myself because i believed that if i didn’t get into a “named” college then i would be a fraud who had just faked his way through high school. during week five, when we were focusing on how stories shape our journey, i found the reassurance that i was looking for in carla harris’s speech. she said, “don’t be distracted or deterred from any imposter syndrome. any moment where you find yourself, trust that the power within you has delivered you in perfect timing to that very moment.” (laetare medalist address by carla harris moreau fye week five). along with this powerful quote that reassured me that i deserved to be where i was, carla harris also discussed the importance of recognizing where we have come from and all the work we have put in. this helped me a lot when i was doubting that i deserved to get into notre dame. looking back on all the work that i had put in and the time i spent allowed me to feel more accomplished and confident in the fact that i ended up where i belong. in order to find out who i am, i had to go on a journey of self-discovery. father pete describes this as, “the greatest journey that you will ever go on” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c., moreau fye week three). i couldn’t agree more with father pete. i’ve only been in college for about two months but i’ve already learned so much more about myself. i’ve taken berne brown’s advice and tried to let go of who i think i should be in order to be who i am. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i am no longer doing activities for the sole reason that it will look good to someone else. i have begun to explore topics and activities that i am actually interested in and i have learned a lot about myself. i learned that i have interests in playing spikeball and rock climbing. as my elective, i took microeconomics and i found out that i really enjoyed it, to the point where i am now considering potentially trying to get a focus in business or finance. although i believe that i am searching for who i am, i know that the answer does not lie solely in myself. in chimamanda adichie’s ted talk, she warns of the danger of a single story and how it will not give the full picture (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i know that i need to look at my environment, both the aspects i can control and the ones that are out of my control, in order to determine who i am. a large part of my environment is the people i choose to surround myself with. in week four, we discussed life-giving relationships. i think oliva taylor perfectly summed up my view on positive friendships. she says, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). i know that the people i surround myself with are going to have a huge impact on who i become and i want friends who are going to help me grow into a better person. during week 6 we wrote poems about where we were from. when discussing where i’m from poetry, george lyon says “the question of where you are from reaches deep” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). it goes beyond the location of where we were born or where we moved to. it can encompass our family, our friends, our childhood, experiences we had, games we played. anything that had an impact on your life shaped where you are from. i think that asking myself this question of where i am from has helped guide me on my journey as i try to discover who i am. moreau links: week 1https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbmkd0&index=3 week 2https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim week 3https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois week 4https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ week 5https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 week 6http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html week 7https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration paper 10/11/21 nhat nguyen moreau integration one paper what do i believe?: a personal analysis of my moreau experience so far when i think about what i miss from home, i immediately think about my childhood bedroom -my soft, comfy bed, my desk, and the personal space i enjoyed so much up until two months ago. there are succulents on the shelves hovering over my chair, a photo collage plastered on the blue walls above my bed, and a shaggy carpet on the floor (perfect for existential crises at 2am). if you were to open one of my desk drawers, you’d be overwhelmed with the sheer amount of chemistry tests, old pre-calculus notes, and post-its from discarded to-do lists over the years. reach back farther, though, and you’ll eventually find a list, crumpled up and covered in slightly legible handwriting and signed with a flamboyant scribble at the bottom. the list is old, probably covered in pencil shavings and dust from years prior. the message it contains, however, has been held over my head for the past four years, and i now live by the words i wrote when i was a freshman in high school. at 15, i started getting into psychology as a result of my dad’s passion for the topic, and one of his activities in the spirit of ‘positive self-growth’ was to write a list of ways i could grow into a leader. i was pretty timid and unconfident in high school, often using self-deprecating humor to cope with my insecurities -so, up until that point, i had never considered myself a leader. i wrote down five key traits that held absolute importance to me at that time (and still do): empathy, resilience, fairness, generosity, and respect. to this day, i think about these traits all the time, and do my best to embody them with the goal of one day becoming the leader i’ve always wanted to be. when assigned this moreau assignment, my mind immediately went back to my freshman year list of morals. over the course, guiding questions have led us through ted talks, youtube videos, papers, and other materials with the goal of deeper contemplation of these important issues. qqcs open up space for meaningful conversation in class, or eye-opening discussions with a classmate around the lake, and i always end the week with a goal to put into practice at least one thing i’ve learned from the moreau materials. here’s what i’ve learned from the past seven weeks, and how it relates to my past, the present moment, and my goals for the future. root belief #1: i believe that my purpose in life is to provide the most amount of support possible, while reminding those around me of their worth and belonging. growing up in a competitive and stressful school environment, i quickly learned to be self-critical, always striving for unrealistic perfection in everything that i did. i didn’t have the right type of friends to remind me to be gentle with myself, and to celebrate every success regardless of the downfalls i would encounter. when i realized the danger of letting my stress and insecurities control my life, i vowed to be a cheerleader for everyone else at notre dame. in week 1, we watched a tedx talk by dr. brené brown on ‘the power of vulnerability’, in which she shares the importance of a balance between positive and negative emotions, and why it’s crucial to embrace those negative emotions too. one important quote that resonated with me was when dr. brown discusses the pressure parents put on their children. she shares, “...[a parent’s] job is not to say “look at her, she’s perfect”...our job is to look and say “you know what, you’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you’re worthy of love and belonging...show me a generation of kids raised like that and we’ll erase the problems we see today” (tedx). when we see ourselves as negative beings, we subconsciously believe we don’t deserve compassion, forgiveness, or love. as a friend, it’s my responsibility to remind others that, despite anything they may fail at or be imperfect at, they are equally as worthy of kindness and empathy too. root belief #2: i believe that i grow in the face of adversity, and by being actively resilient through challenges and tough periods, i can become my most authentic self. it’s easy to feel overwhelmed at a school like notre dame, which is composed of stellar students from all across the world, equally as nervous and excited to start the next four years of their lives. the first month of the school year was rough for me socially -i felt isolated and alone as everyone found fast friend groups through classes and activities, while i only knew classmates in passing. i worked hard to keep trying, to keep pushing through and stepping out of my comfort zone to meet new people, and eventually it paid off. looking back, i’m proud of myself for continuing to be resilient despite the tough social climate that many of us have to navigate in our first year at college. in david brooks’ week 2 tedx talk ‘should you live for your resume or your eulogy?”, he brings up an important point about the culture of our society: “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses...we live in a culture with an adam i mentality…nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love...therefore we must be saved by that final form of love, which is forgiveness” (tedx). as brooks emphasizes, nothing can be accomplished alone -as cliche as it is, we need to use our strengths and weaknesses and combine them with those of others to become the best versions of ourselves. by being vulnerable and open with those around me, i grew into an authentic version of myself, and will continue to do despite the challenges i’ll face going forward. root belief #3: i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being a compassionate friend for others, and at the same time, others are equally responsible for caring about me too, and by fostering a mutually supportive friendship, we can help others navigate through their own problems. in middle school, i experienced my fair share of poor friendships filled with exclusivity, unkindness, and unsupportiveness. part of the issue was that i never felt heard, and my voice never seemed to be prioritized in conversation, yet i made constant efforts to be a supportive shoulder for those who needed it. as i changed friend groups and finally found friends who wanted to listen to me too in high school and at nd, i learned the importance of listening, empathy, and caring. in the grotto network article from week 3 on the importance of a healthy relationship, one section stood out to me: “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term. think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend. the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (grotto). i chose this quote in my qqc because i think the message is so important -a friendship is not a one way street, or a therapist-type relationship. we need to be respected and mutually supported in our relationships, and only then can we learn to flourish as a community. root belief #4: i believe that i am constantly searching for a meaning to my life, regardless of whether i find my purpose through religion or not. i grew up agnostic, so i didn’t have the same faith background starting at notre dame unlike many of my catholic peers, who root their faith and answers to life in god and catholicism. however, i’ve never not felt part of the community -the way we treat each other and always look out for others is a strong representation of the nd student body as a whole. i’m free to find my passions and goals on my own, through my own methods and experiences. in father pete mccormick’s week 4 video ‘student reflections on faith’, he says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be; the person god intended you to be” (mccormick). i really agree with this quote, as self discovery is such an important and exciting chapter of your life. the fact that i am able to do this both in the presence of the catholic community, other religious groups, and those who aren’t religious is an incredibly special way for me to gain unique perspectives on what it means to be my authentic self. root belief #5: i believe that i pursue truth by learning the stories of others no matter how good or bad, and by openly sharing my background and the stories that have built my personality too. since the rise of social media, we have made a strong attempt as a population to hide and cover up the stories that have negatively impacted us or made us feel embarrassed, anxious, or upset. welcome to instagram -an app exclusively dedicated towards the ‘highlight reel’, where feeds are filled with only the good moments of our lives. here’s the beauty of in-person relationships: vulnerability and storytelling is when we learn the most about someone’s life and background. our stories are engraved on our bodies, in the lines on our palms and the way we interact with others -and despite the fact that many of these stories and experiences are negative and upsetting, these are what build us and make us who we are. with each experience, we mature and grow, and learn a little bit more about what it means to be human, experiencing life as an nd student. this idea as a whole relates to a few important resources from the latter part of the moreau course thus far: week 5’s laetare medalist address by carla harris, week 6’s ‘where i’m from’ poems by george ella lyon and myself, and week 7’s scientific direct article on implicit bias written by keith payne and others. in her address to the notre dame community, carla harris says the following: “any moment that you find yourself, trust that the power within you has delivered you in perfect timing...pay attention to things as they happen to you for when life comes to teach you a lesson” (carla harris). this powerful quote reminds me that everything we experience in life -our stories -teach us lessons for the future, and that we must experience growth and change to find our true selves. i wrote about this idea in my week 6 ‘where i’m from’ poem, inspired by the work of george ella lyon -every experience i’ve had to go through has taught me my morals, what i value, my beliefs, and how i need to approach things in the future. i am from my childhood and my past, and george ella lyon is too; in his poem, he powerfully writes, “under my bed was a dress box spilling old pictures, a sift of lost faces to drift beneath my dreams” (lyon). with this verse in his poem, he emphasizes how the people of his past have influenced him. finally, in the scientific direct article, the authors write about how truth and bias can often lead us to have unfair opinions, especially in a racial sense. this relates to the idea that we need to learn each other’s stories and backgrounds before creating our own opinions on them. one quote says, “race can bias people to see harmless objects as weapons when they are in the hands of black men and to dislike abstract images that are paired with black faces” (scientific direct). if we were to simply take the time to learn about someone and put aside all past judgments (fair or not, which in this case, are definitely not and show threads of racism), we can start on the long path to anti-hate and prejudice. through compassion and a listening ear, our community has a chance at becoming more open, loving, and less judgmental. i’ve learned a lot from the past eight weeks, and have been guided by the course and the discussions in my class on my own path to self discovery. i know what i believe in. i know my morals and values like a map on the back of my hand. all i need to do, and all we need to do together, is act upon them and keep others in mind when making decisions for ourselves. only then, through vulnerability, healthy relationships, fairness, kindness, and storytelling, can we support each other through the crazy experience that we like to call ‘our young adult lives’. works cited (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two) (the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four) ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau week five) ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau week six) (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american moreau week seven https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109288 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109340 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109386 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109402 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109407 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109410 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/modules/items/109410 integration one professor kelly moreau fye 13 october 2021 what controls your destiny? mahatma gandhi once said, “your beliefs become your thoughts, your thoughts become your words, your words become your actions, your actions become your habits, your habits become your values, your values become your destiny.” this quote puts into perspective how important and transformative your beliefs can be in shaping your life. throughout my first few months at notre dame, moreau has made me evaluate and re-evaluate my beliefs every week. this process has been very beneficial to me, as i have been able to look at both how my beliefs are beneficial to my life, as well as learning new perspectives that are better alternatives to the way i see things. i now feel like i have a much more refined set of beliefs than i did when i got to notre dame, and that has led me to view the world much differently than before. i believe that i can best pursue truth through looking at multiple perspectives. oftentimes, for varying reasons, people refuse to acknowledge a different viewpoint than what has become customary to them. for example, many members of the gateway program originally were turned off by the idea as they expected to get into notre dame straightaway. it wasn’t until they reached out to connect with others, that they changed their perspective and became more open to the idea. one person who analyzed this idea of taking in different perspectives is chimamonda ngozi adichie. in her ted talk, she says, “show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become” (“danger of a single story” by chimamonda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i believe that this immensely narrows one’s view of the https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript?language=en world, and makes it impossible for them to experience things for what they really are. if you are able to effectively understand ideas and people from different perspectives, it is far easier for you to appreciate them. i believe that i can grow through loving others, as well as loving myself. during a homework assignment when i took the via character strengths survey, i found that love was one of my five lowest ranked traits. the previous week, in a video regarding vulnerability, the speaker said, “there was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it. and that was that people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). through this class, i have begun to understand the importance of self love, and i plan on practicing it more as i continue my life. i believe that this will allow me to have less stress in my life, boost my confidence, and increase my motivation. furthermore, in the second week of this course, we watched a video in which the speaker said, “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone. therefore we must be saved by love” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). this has inspired me to try and be more loving towards others, as we all need each other to accomplish our own individual goals, as cliche as it may sound. furthermore, i believe that hope is a critical component to love. in our week 3 assignment, i read a quote that said, “hope is the confidence that we are moving toward light, not darkness; joy, not sorrow; life, not death” (“faith brings light to a dark world” prof. david fagerberg moreau fye week three). if you believe you are moving towards light, it is easier to love others. if you believe you are moving towards sorrow, the will to love becomes weaker. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy?language=zh https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ i believe that forging life-giving relationships is crucial, as it is important to surround yourself with people who care about you as much as you care about them. i learned this before college, which has allowed me to form great relationships with those around me in school and in extracurriculars. part of why i have been able to learn this is by keeping an eye out for signs of an unhealthy relationship, most notably mutual care and attention. according to one of our week 4 readings, “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week four). if you are capable of giving your friend or partner your undivided attention when necessary, you can often form a good relationship with them. however, if you feel as if your partner is incapable of repaying their attention to you, it will be difficult to form a meaningful connection. another thing to take into account when forming relationships is you want to make sure that the person you’re with has things in common with you. in week 5, we looked at our own backgrounds to determine where we came from. the writer of the example “where i’m from” poem said she was able to create a network of writers who shared a similar passion to her through these kinds of poems (“where i’m from” george ella lyon moreau fye week six) this is an example of forming connections through a shared passion, which can be found through looking at your upbringing as done in the poems. lastly, i believe that education, specifically education of both the mind and the soul, is crucial to becoming your best self. in our week 5 assignment, i heard fr. kevin gates say an education is “a work of the resurrection...a work of life, out of death” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). to me, in order for this quote to stand correctly, it is important to educate more than just the mind. for example, if you are only learning how to write an essay to get an a, you aren’t getting a work of life out of death. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 however, if you use your writing abilities to write about a passion of yours, and you use that passion to make a difference in the world, then i believe that education was successful. overall, my first few months at notre dame have shaped my beliefs more than i would have ever thought possible. moreau in particular has done a great job helping me make connections to my own life, and reflecting on both myself and society as a whole. by refining my own beliefs, i believe that i am better able to follow my moral compass, and in part, control my destiny. my adventures at notre dame 1 jenson gunawan tjoa professor oswald moreau first year experience 02 december 2021 my adventures at notre dame what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? after just 6 months in notre dame, a lot in my life has changed. the relationships i built, the hope i lost, but then found again, the failures i encountered, and the challenges i faced in my community have given me the clarity i needed to move on and excel during my journey at notre dame as well as after graduation. some important questions i have asked this semester include: if we don’t meet certain expectations, is there a way to stop feeling like we’re not good enough? how do i recognize when there are challenges in my community? how do i regain the hope i lost?, and what is a good way to connect, bond and join with different communities from different cultures? setting expectations in general are good as they can help us improve on our failures. studying here at notre dame, i also set up expectations for myself in certain classes to make sure that i am doing well. if i fall below my expectations or a class’ expectations, that would let me know that i need to work harder to get my grades up. for example, if i currently have a b in my writing class and i’m aiming for an a, these expectations would motivate me to put extra time towards my essay, improving and revising as needed. however, as mentioned by julia 2 hogan, “none of them tell me that they believe they are living a fulfilling life when they let their self-worth be defined by these external expectations” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). this quote is very important because while it is important to set certain goals in your life, you shouldn’t let them define you. just because you didn’t get an a in a certain class does not mean that you are worth any less than your peers. you shouldn’t compare yourself to others, especially if they make you feel bad about your accomplishments. the most important thing is that you try your best and have hope that things will work out. as a result, my accomplishments and expectations out of notre dame have both grown and decreased in importance. on one hand, i’ve been doing my best in participating and contributing in core classes and clubs, helping me grow and learn as a scholar and as a person. on the other, i don’t let peer pressure/competition about grades stress me out so much as i don’t feel that it is as important. sure, it is very important to me that i get good grades, but i’m not willing to sacrifice my health, sleep as well as the many relationships that i have built here in notre dame go to waste just to get a better grade than my friend. in the future, i will set expectations such as job applications that i believe are beneficial to me and my growth, not for a petty competition. stereotypes and racism used to be black and white to me. now, it feels a little bit ambiguous. sometimes, jokes that people make can be funny. but other times, they can often hurt others in ways you can’t expect. drawing the line between a joke and something offensive can be a bit complicated. when eating at north dining hall, i made a rather stereotypical joke that, in my head at the time, wouldn't hurt anyone. i thought it was just a joke, but some people took it deeply and were offended by what i said. obviously, i apologized and we are still friends https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/ 3 right now, but that encounter made me realize that notre dame is very different from the culture in high school i’m used to. there is a much bigger diversity going on around campus. each classroom and dorm is filled with people from different countries in asia, north america, south america, and europe. in my high school, everyone was from asia so there wasn’t much diversity. i realize that i should be careful with the jokes i make because different people here come from different backgrounds and they may take the joke to mean something different. however, i am grateful for notre dame’s diversity. i love meeting new people and learning about how their life was different from mine. “exposure and access to different viewpoints and life experiences offer insights and change biases” ("diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). the people i’ve met in my business classes and dorms as well as notre dame clubs such as notre dame investment club and notre dame habitat for humanity have helped me create bonds with people from all walks of life. strengthening the bond with others requires an introduction and just talking. most of the time, you’ll find some similarity between you and your friends that can deepen your relationship and all this requires is that you get out of your comfort zone. although i’m an introvert, i still want to make friends here at notre dame so i talk to people in classes and clubs to form life-long bonds. next semester, i would like to join several clubs such as the asia business society and the student international business club (sibc) to meet people from different cultures. joining asian business society will allow me to meet with people who come from similar backgrounds as i do. also, from what i understand sibc is a huge club filled with so many different people. there is no doubt in my mind that i can bond and make friends with new people while i’m there. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 4 before coming to notre dame, hope has always been unclear or vague to me. that’s because hope is something intangible. i can't see or hold it. attending a catholic instead of a secular institution has strengthened my spirituality and my relationship with god. the presence of god is everywhere on campus, from the grotto, basilica, and most of all, the godly character conveyed through both notre dame staff and my peers. when making a decision on which college i should ultimately attend, i fully resonated with notre dame’s motto “the mind shall not be cultivated at the expense of the heart.” every week here at notre dame, i attend the basilica for mass on sundays, or even when i sleep in, i attend the dorm mass that is available at night. coming to mass together with my peers and roommate to worship god has allowed me to feel hope. although i personally believe in god and the hope that he brings, “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (holy cross chirstian and education by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). living and growing in hope is to believe that good things will always come to you as you do good deeds. we shouldn’t give up when facing the obstacles our adversities provide us. what we should do is stand up and fight harder for what we believe in. growing in hope also means not letting go of our faith and our own personal beliefs. as i continue towards my next semester, i will continue to attend church masses that the university of notre dame provides so i can strengthen the hope i have in god. often, in the basilica, the priest mentions programs for people around the community of south bend and students at the holy cross and st mary’s community colleges. during my next 4 years at notre dame, i might want to take part in one of those programs and create bonds with new people around me. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192813 5 as notre dame students, we all have to live in a dorm and be part of the dorm culture. well, a few weeks ago, i had a fight with my roommate about how to keep the room clean as well as having people over. thankfully, it’s all resolved now and there are no hard feelings. in fact, i believe that my relationship with him has gotten stronger because of it. the quote, “i want people to know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, because it allows you to grow and expand” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto (kristen-kintsugi artist) moreau fye week 10). i was actually able to experience that here at notre dame. after having the heated conversation and just shouting out our feelings, we started really talking about what was bothering us and made an attempt to compromise. i actually understood him better and felt closer and more comfortable to him after the encounter. likewise, when there is trouble or dissonance in your community, people should just speak their concerns and advocate for change when needed. with just open honesty and talking, i believe we could solve most of the challenges we face both in our communities and our lives. as i continue here in notre dame, undoubtedly, i will face challenges and dissonance that may let me down or hurt me. during my time here, i would like to make more friends and also develop relationships with professors in subjects that i love. maybe i could be a teacher’s assistant for one of those classes. this would require me getting out of my comfort zone but that’s ok. my first semester here at notre dame taught me that it’s good to go out of my comfort zone and just try to talk with the people around campus. most colleagues and staff here are very friendly and moraeu has taught me they’re here to help me and that's a resource i would be more than happy to use. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ integration two strength and growth comes from effort and struggle prompt: what have i encountered and how will i respond? i believe that from an early age i have encountered different perspectives, experiences and challenges that have shaped me to be the person i am today. today, our society faces many deep seated issues such as segregation and systemic racism, but how we respond to them can change our society and us as individuals. as encapsulated by the klau centre archive on race “the story of race has many voices. understanding it begins with listening. every testament is a statement of personal truth. and each must be heard as part of a larger story“. (“with voice true snapshot summary” by klau centre archive on racemoreau fye week 11) as illustrated in the video, the story of race has diverse and different perspectives and cannot truly be understood without listening to them. in order to truly grasp the issues and the harsh realities associated with our society, we need to listen to people’s voices and their stories and experiences. from a young age, switching schools and meeting people and having friends from different ethnicities, races and backgrounds in different high schools, i had never understood how big the issue of segregation of backgrounds was. but, every time i hear statistical evidence, i truly understand the systemic racism and segregation of races in our society. we must understand that by listening to their testament and looking into their lives through these personal truths and experiences, we enable change to take place. i believe that all of us face such challenges in society and that we must stay strong through these challenges, helping one another through each situation by listening and taking due consideration. from a young age, my parents and family would always pass down the idea that struggle makes you stronger but i would often find myself confused by this idea as i would think to myself, “what if you get demotivated by the obstacles in your path?”. “how must you respond to challenges without being demotivated by them”. as time progressed, i faced a variety of challenges: societal and academic pressure all closing in on me at once. very often i would find myself daunted by such situations, but as time progressed i learned to have a positive outlook over challenges that knocked me down. i believe that there is no best method to tackle challenges. obstacles, while troublesome, will teach you the importance of perseverance and understanding how to deal with uncertainty. i believe that we must embrace the good, the bad and the ugly and use those experiences to mold ourselves to be stronger and better. as kirsten expresses in her article, “people should know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.”(“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgesonmoreau fye week 10) through this quote, kirsten helgeson shows us that our hearts being broken is absolutely fine. she tries to normalize brokenness through challenges, so that people are able to overcome their pain without feeling ashamed or embarrassed, but understanding that it’s part of life. she illustrates through the quote that we can actually grow as https://voicestrue.nd.edu https://voicestrue.nd.edu https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ a person from being broken by challenges. this can be through better mental health from getting out of a toxic relationship, stronger bonds of relationship or can serve as a motivator by channeling the painful memories to do something better. further, she shows us that we can actually put our heart together and develop as a person by improving on our weaknesses and flaws and learning not to repeat the same mistakes. i have been fortunate enough to have parents who have not imposed expectations on me but have always encouraged me to do the best i can. however, in india, i have noticed that children often try to live up to expectations imposed on them by society and parents to be perfect, mainly academically, which can cause these kids to experience burnout, depression and a feeling of being a failure when encountered by an obstacle they cannot overcome. from my experiences, i have learnt that forcing yourself to be society’s expectations can negatively affect you and can make you lose your authenticity. “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.”(“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9) this quote from the article from the grotto written by julie hogan was eyeopening and one that i resonate with deeply. julie hogan tries to show us that we don’t need to create and fulfill expectations imposed on us by society and make it our end goal, but we must aim to do the best we can. while everyone has expectations and goals for you, at the end it is your choice of what you want to do, in the best way you can. lastly, julia leaves us with a message that when we let go of these expectations that burden us, we can grow as a person and be authentic to what we stand for. by letting go of these expectations we can respond to things we encounter in our life more calmly and easily and can respond to these situations with a “go for it” ideology. i believe that along with keeping my families’ ideologies of how to tackle challenges and keeping a positive attitude, faith also plays an important role in how i respond to challenges and what i encounter in my life. when i was a young boy, i would often find myself having conflicting ideas and thoughts about the existence of god as i thought if i could not see him, he didn’t exist. but, as time progressed and i faced different adversities, i found myself turning towards my faith for hope and a possible solution. as time progressed, my ideas on god changed as i started to believe in his existence more and i started to put god in the center of my life. as i have started to put god in the center, i have learned to encounter different things life throws at me with hope. when faced with adversities or when i find myself worried, i turn to god and find solace in the idea that god will make sure i will be able to do what i am destined for. “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty.”(“the screwtape letters, chapter 8” by c. s lewismoreau fye week 12) the quote written by c. s lewis perfectly encapsulates how we can be hopeful in our life even when our journey of life may be undulating. lewis tells us about how we may https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486/download?download_frd=1 encounter different adversities and have our ups and downs in our life, but we must put god in the center and let him guide the way he paved for us. in my experience here at notre dame i have faced many challenges and adapted to a different environment. these challenges can come from having a different accent, pronouncing some words differently or not relating to certain parts of american culture such as big christmas celebrations or watching football over the weekend. however, my family’s ideology of “struggle makes you stronger” has taught me not to be bogged down by such situations and to embrace the different cultures. combined with a positive attitude, i believe that our differences can be used to show our unique experiences as an engaging way to make conversation and provide different perspectives to people. i believe that to respond to these encounters, we have to understand that people may not have experienced what you may have. therefore to allow them to relate to you, you must explain yourself and be patient. further, i believe that by listening to other people’s challenges, showing empathy and allowing all voices to be heard we can help respond to different encounters and situations effectively. apart from having challenges here at notre dame, i have also encountered a great set of diverse and different minded people and friends who have guided me through their culture and taken me in like their family. i have learned that while being different and diverse, we can relate with others on a personal level through experiences. i have also encountered a great group of friends who have introduced me to their family and trusted me with their secrets and challenges. i believe that by adapting to a different environment and culture and going through this process one step at a time has allowed me to respond effectively to these encounters while staying whole during the procedure. ultimately, i believe that each individual has their own way of responding to things they encounter in their life. i believe that with a positive attitude, mental strength and hope we can overcome anything that we encounter in life. my bright horizon: how i have & will continue to respond to changes in my life after almost an entire semester of college, i can definitively say that it was not what i was expecting. granted, i didn’t come in with many expectations, but i think the most shocking difference between high school and college was the amount of new freedom. this freedom has definitely led to late nights of procrastination and forgetting to do simple tasks like laundry or going to dinner. however, i know that these past 3 months have helped me grow in different ways and allowed me to respond to change with a new perspective. along the way, i have encountered different life issues, and the way in which i have responded to such has helped me better understand myself. am i doing something that i truly want to be doing? this is a question that i knew the answer to in high school: no. many of the activities and groups that i was involved in were simply resume-builders. i knew what my short-term goal was: get into a good college. and i did. unfortunately, i am now not sure what direction to head in. with expectations from my parents, siblings, and friends back home, it is difficult to truly explore different areas of study. however, as julia hogan said, “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). with this in mind, i was able to accept the fact that i had to drop out of a class and knew that my potential majors might be changing. at the beginning of the year, my notre dame introduction sounded something like this: “hi! i’m . i live in johnson family hall, and i will be majoring in finance and political science.” i was wrong! upon finding social entrepreneurship & innovation minor, i knew that something was going to have to give. social entrepreneurship is the only avenue that i have found thus far that i seriously know would be viable and fulfilling as a career. i have been able to be honest with myself and realize not only that i don’t have to do two majors and a minor, but also that i don’t necessarily want to. as i have learned, balance and sleep are very important, something that i think there would be an acute lack of with two majors and a minor. therefore, i have been able to manage both my parents' expectations for me to get a business degree and my own of not trying to overload myself. currently, i plan on majoring in business analytics and minoring in social entrepreneurship & innovation and possibly sustainability. how have my personal relationships with others grown with my experience here at notre dame? in the last week before coming to school, i broke up with my long-term partner. although i understand that it was something that was going to happen, it still very much emotionally impacted me in both the months leading up to it and the weeks after. as said by the grotto network, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto network moreau fye week ten). with time, i have been able to heal from the experience. during high school, the relationship had negative impacts on my friendships with others, which was something that i was able to recognize but not do anything about. here at notre dame, my perspective on friendships has very much shifted. friendships with others should and will always come first, as i move forward with my life. not only are they more fulfilling, but they are longer-lasting. i plan on using the rest of my time at notre dame to cultivate meaningful friendships, many of which i have already made. with such low diversity on campus, how have i done my part to educate myself on social issues? as explained by professor fuentes, “if we look at the way in which our society is structured, we see that racism and racial bias is implicit in the american experience” ("diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). like the american experience, i do believe it should be recognized that racism is also implicit in the notre dame experience. if the issue is ignored and swept under the rug, there will be no positive change. the lack of diversity on this campus is a big driver for most of this. i have observed that when people feel that they are in an environment that seems to have no consequences, they will say anything. it is very important to continue to raise awareness through the form of education of this issue and continue the conversation. how have i been able to find and demonstrate virtue on this campus without being catholic? i do not believe that one has to be catholic, or even religious, to live a virtuous life. humanity has a special way of generally seeking the right way. in the screwtape letters, lewis writes: “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (the screwtape letters, chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i believe that this passage can be interpreted in an agnostic sense as well, for humans have a tendency to seek goodness and act in ways that create good effects, even when religion is not involved. i find that those who seek to do good without the promise of an eternal reward can also be seen as equally virtuous to those who are religious. i have already learned a great amount about myself and others during my short time here at notre dame. i hope that i will be able to continue to grow and change for the better in order to both have the best experience here and set myself up for success in the future. integration one boennighausen 1 integration one 15 october 2021 strengthening and creating beliefs throughout the first two months of moreau class, i’ve learned a lot about what i didn’t know i believed and confirmed a lot of what i believed prior to coming to college. through each week’s content, i got to explore some of my inner feelings and develop new opinions on how my life applies to different concepts. i believe that some of my biggest failures in life so far have been not even attempting to try new things that i want to do. i think most people think that failure most commonly occurs when you try something and don’t succeed. while that has happened to me many times, my biggest regrets come from the things i don’t even try in the first place. for example, i’ve always loved theater, but i didn’t make enough of an effort to get involved with it in high school. i’m not good at singing, and i’m self-conscious around other people, so i thought auditioning would be embarrassing. not being able to predict or control what would happen if i tried to join theater in high school, i was hesitant. as i watched rene brown’s tedtalk about vulnerability, i immediately thought of this experience when she mentioned that her “mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live is with vulnerability. and to stop controlling and predicting” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i realized, although i think i already knew deep down, that if i had allowed myself to be vulnerable and auditioned for high school theater, something great could have come out of it. even though this failure to act might be worse than at least trying and failing, there is no point in which success cannot be a consequential result. father kevin grove’s talk mentioned a lot about how it’s difficult to grow and succeed without failing first (“two notre dames: your holy cross https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 boennighausen 2 education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). after i failed to pursue my love of theater in high school, i immediately seeked out opportunities at notre dame. i am now one of the assistant stage managers for the fall musical being put on by pemco, the student-run theater company on campus. not wanting to miss out on any other opportunities to try new things, i also joined the ultimate frisbee club right away. although it could’ve easily been another failure to learn from, this step out of my comfort zone was an overwhelming success as i’ve found a welcoming and fun community! i believe that i am constantly searching for ways to defy stereotypes. when talking about implicit bias in class, we were given a set of statements such as “i don’t have to be ashamed of my significant other in public.” while i am extremely privileged to not have related to most of the statements, the last one aligned with my experience as a girl. more specifically, it aligned with my experience as a girl who plays a lot of sports. there is a stereotype, of course, that girls are not athletic. even though that’s not necessarily true, implicit bias ensures that it’s almost always the first thought that crosses someone’s mind when they think about who can and cannot play sports (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). one thing i pride myself on is proving that i am, in fact, pretty decent at sports. i’ve always loved smashing this stereotype because i’ve played sports for as long as i can remember. something that has helped me embrace this part of me was reading the where i’m from poems in week six of class. where you are from usually results in people naming a city or country as a response, but the poems we read used experience, objects, and concepts to describe the author (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). in my poem, i mention the dirt in my softball cleats and the plastic trophy from the competitions my cousins and i have every holiday. these experiences i have with sports both https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html boennighausen 3 perfectly encompass “where i’m from” and help me combat implicit bias by smashing stereotypes. i believe that i do not have to force faith upon myself to find internal value. in week two, we talked about adam i and adam ii as being representations of striving for external success versus internal value (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). considering notre dame is a catholic university, i feel pressure to find internal value through faith or religion. the problem with this is that i’m not super religious and faith is not a central part of my life. this clash in preference makes the pressure to find internal value seem more difficult. when we talked about our faith journeys a week later, i was hoping to find some clarity about my situation. but as we read stories about the faith journeys of notre dame students, all of them who didn’t already feel that faith was a key aspect of their day-to-day life said that they eventually did after coming to notre dame (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry moreau fye week three). reading those stories did not relieve any of the pressure, but i’ve decided not to let that affect me. i think one of my strongest characteristics is that i usually don’t let what everyone else is doing force me into doing something i don’t want to do. even if it seems intimidating or awkward, i can switch into a “don’t care” attitude that lets me go about my day with a more positive attitude about who i am as a person. i’m not saying that i’ll never become religious or faithful; i’m just saying that if i ever do, it will be on my own terms. i’ve enjoyed all the content in moreau so far because it has both strengthened beliefs i already had and created new ones by driving me to make an opinion. moving forward, i hope to continue engaging with content that challenges me to reflect on myself in ways i never have before. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view integration two nhat nguyen moreau 3 december 2021 what have i encountered and how will i respond? throughout my time here at notre dame so far i have encountered many things that have allowed me to learn a lot about myself over the first semester. being away from home has made me learn many things about myself that i was unable to realize in the past living at home with my parents. moving away from home to go to school has i’ve one of the hardest things i've ever encountered; i’m forced to make my decisions in which i am required to be independent and wise with every situation and decision i am faced with. i believe that notre dame has forced me to face every challenge i encounter with a positive attitude with the knowledge that struggle will lead to personal growth and prosperity. even since coming to college, i’ve been faced with many internal and external challenges when it comes to school, athletics, and social life. for example, many of my peers are very interested in getting the college experience of partying, drinking, and going out to bars. however, i have realized that being a student-athlete with a pre-health major makes it very difficult to balance these activities nor would i like to participate in them. this always conflicts with me because i feel that if i don’t go out and party i will miss out on forming friendships and a potentially good time. however, i have learned that my school work and athletic performance come above everything else. for example, in the article, julia hogan states “you can live your life according to others expectations.” this quotation illustrates that you must choose your path and make your priorities otherwise you will not be successful. when we listen to those around us, it becomes difficult for us to focus on our own goals which don’t promote success and individual growth. perhaps creating a routine in which you stick to your goals can help one reach their full potential because preparing a routine allows one to stay on track with minimal distractions or issues that could lead to failure. sometimes i set very high expectations for myself in which i, become very stressed over being perfect in lacrosse and school. in addition to this, i sometimes let others’ opinions and comments influence those aspects of my life in which i am faced with internal and external conflict. to overcome these conflicts i always try to create a plan and stick to a routine while weighing out the pros and cons of every situation. for example, if i don’t perform well in lacrosse i make a plan to work on what i’m struggling with, i stick to the routine to fix the issue, and lastly, i try to stay positive and block out distractions that could influence my goals. finding a healthy way to handle conflict is essential to succeed in college and all aspects of life and if one always does their best they will achieve their dreams. coming to college is one of the biggest transitions one will ever make in their lifetime. college requires you to face mental, physical, and emotional challenges that lead to personal growth and success due to facing challenges and hardships that make you a more well-rounded individual. throughout my life, i encountered many challenges but nothing compared to the transition from college. when my dad first came to visit me i immediately broke down into tears saying “college was too much.” i struggle to balance school, sports, and social life which led me to a breakdown. he sat and comforted me and reassured me that everything would be fine as long as i always tried my best. his wise words and comfort from my family, friends, and teammates stuck with me for the weeks to follow which allowed me to find my balance in which i started to become more successful in all aspects of my life. father jenkins states in an article that “without conviction, there would be no hope.” this quotation suggests that conviction is an essential part of our lives that alludes to the idea that one must struggle to grow and help others within the community. for example, when i overcame the struggle of finding a balance in college i was able to help other athletes around me going through the same issues in which i was their hope and motivation to keep persevering through the struggle. encountering challenges and brokenness is what makes you into the person you are today. the most important thing is the community around you, so when you face a challenge you have a great support system around you ready to help. many problems come from within a community which creates division and hatred which was stated in the text by father jenkins. that's why it is important to unite and conquer every challenge or issue as a unified group to create connections instead of brokenness. when one encounters brokenness it’s essential to unite and conquer the challenge with your friends and family who are there to love and support you. community is truly important here at notre dame. when i first arrived i instantly felt as if i was at home. luckily i have been allowed to play lacrosse here in which i was placed in an amazing welcoming community right away. i truly did not understand the importance of culture and community until i arrived here on campus and within the first few weeks, i felt as if i gained 35 sisters who would be there for me through thick and thin. the sense of family, love, and care is what makes this university so special. in the article, parker palmer states “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” this quotation is suggesting that maybe letting people settle into a new environment instead of forcing relationships will help contribute to building a healthy relationship with those around you. the sense of community is built on the foundation of individuals. in the article, the author addresses how an individual must be open and ready to build relationships however these relationships should not be forced they should develop over time. this means that one should have the ability to resist character traits of narcissism, jealousy, competition, nationalism, or any feeling/character trait that could damage relationships. culture can be severely damaged if one lets these traits influence and impact the relationships that are formed within a community. therefore one needs to have the strength to develop healthy strategies that can be used to build bonds. the bonds i formed with my teammates were natural because we are all are working towards the same goal of a national championship and we all have positive attitudes to push ourselves to be the best we can be. lastly, i personally believe that to overcome struggles one must have a strong community. i’ve learned that throughout my life i have faced various struggles whether it was academically, on the lacrosse field, or at home. as mentioned in the article community is about being there to support others when needed and my teammates have been there for me when i’ve faced challenges in school; even if they simply just text me to check in to see how my day is going it truly means the most. therefore the sense of community is filled with relationships built on the foundations of love, care, and support which helps one overcome any obstacle with a strong sense of community. here at notre dame, i believe that community is an important aspect that is required for people to grow in hope. ever since a young age, i have never understood the concept of hope until i was the age of 16. after i tore my acl i had no hope that i would ever return to play until i met my surgeon and he told me the reason he became a surgeon was to help all injured elite athletes return to play at full strength due to his injuries in the past. ever since that moment, i remember reaching out to some of my younger teammates and athletes on teams i coached who tore their acls to give them hope that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. i would always reassure them that the struggle would make them stronger and better on the other side. i took upon myself the role of being the hope for those that needed it during a dark time in their recovery. in the article about father moreau, it states “instead he spent many years as a student and professor formulating a rich spirituality based upon imitating the person of jesus that he ended up applying practically in the communities and ministries he established.”this quotation illustrates that father moreau was the hope others needed. the text states that he used his education to further develop other areas of the university and to help others which is very selfless. father moreau’s selflessness illustrates how he was the hope for those who needed it the most. instead of prospering as an individual, he used his knowledge to give hope to allow his community to prosper and grow around him. father moreau dedicated each branch he established to a particular person whose values were rooted in education which would further develop the community around us. the feeling of hope truly comes from a sense of community. i believe that if one has a strong community around them hope is what will get one through the toughest times. in the text, it states how father moreau was selfless and helped others grow and prosper when they were at their lowest moments. here at notre dame, i believe that our education will help form and shape us into the best possible individuals we can be. we should carry what we learn here and become the hope that someone else needs somewhere else. hope is something that is intertwined with a notre dame education that is not offered anywhere else. through my past few months here at notre dame i have laughed a lot, learned to love my new home, and even shed some tears with the ones i love and trust the most. i have encountered various situations in which i have learned new things and grown as an individual based on the experience and outcome. when i first started this course there was an emphasis on the journey we were embarking on at notre dame to become the best people we possibly can be. in only these thirteen weeks i have realized the importance of community and culture and how the loving friendships i share with the people around me allow me to conquer any challenge or conflict i encounter. the culture embeddedsomethingthe university of notre dame is something i would never trade for the world. learning to struggle and succeed is what allows me to keep overcoming any obstacle that steps in my path to discover who i am. integration 2 integrating hope and growth through challenges: semester 1 at notre dame caroline van bell this past semester at notre dame has been a time of great personal growth for me as i transitioned into college life academically, socially, spiritually, and emotionally. i have encountered some incredibly joyful moments as well as some not-so joyful moments. throughout this semester, the challenges i have faced, the successes i have had, and the struggles i have experienced have allowed me to grow, reflect, and learn. one struggle that i have had my whole life and have continued to have at notre dame is holding myself to unrealistic expectations. perfectionism is something that has been very difficult for me and is an obstacle that i encounter nearly everyday. the grotto article that we read during week nine had a quote that in particular stood out to me and described my experience with perfectionism quite well: “...expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.”1 in order to combat the feeling of never being good enough i’ve had to learn how to give myself grace. it can be very difficult and it takes a lot of conscious effort to do, but giving myself grace is incredibly important for my overall wellbeing and emotional health. one way that i have been able to overcome the obstacle of perfectionism is through my daily gratitude journal. the format is quite simple; in the morning, i write down three things that i am grateful for, three things that would make today great, and one daily affirmation. in the evening, usually right before i go to bed, i write down three amazing things that happened to me that day and one idea for how i could have made the day better. taking a moment in the morning to be mindful, set some intentions for my day, and write a positive affirmation have really helped 1 “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine me in overcoming my perfectionism. one of my favorite affirmations that i write is “i am capable of giving myself grace.” simply writing down this affirmation consciously and unconsciously reminds me of my intention to give myself grace throughout the day. one of the three things that i typically write down for “what would make today great” is deep breaths. oftentimes, my mind can start racing when i look at my long list of tasks and i start overthinking everything. returning to my breath for just a few moments can really help center and ground myself in the present moment and help take away the feeling that i will never be good enough. i enjoy setting goals for myself and i think that it is healthy to have goals to be working towards; however, my issue is when i have constant expectations that are too difficult to achieve. besides perfectionism, another issue i have encountered this semester is imposter syndrome. as the semester has progressed, my imposter syndrome has lessened, but it was definitely something that i encountered the first few months of school. for me, imposter syndrome wasn’t so much questioning whether or not i was supposed to be at notre dame, it was more so questioning whether or not i was supposed to be in science and the glynn program. i felt really lost in my biology class and lab, and felt very lost in my glynn philosophy seminar. my high school experience did not prepare me for either of those classes, so i felt really lost and was questioning my ability to succeed. the difficulties with imposter syndrome that i encountered also tied into the struggles with perfectionism that i encountered. i set very high expectations for myself, and one of those expectations was getting the same grades that i did in high school. i soon realized that in college, it was okay to not get all a’s. but still, i felt like i had failed to meet my expectations every time i got anything less than that on a quiz or paper. an area in which i encountered feelings of inadequacy was in my friendships. i felt lucky to have a strong group of friends in my dorm, but i was often so busy studying and doing work that i felt that i was an inadequate and unworthy friend because i was not spending enough time with them. as the semester progressed, i realized that we were all very busy and that even just studying in the same space together is a good way to spend time with one another even when we are busy. i also encountered brokenness this semester when i learned of the breast cancer diagnosis of my mom. it was difficult learning of this information during the midst of thanksgiving break, right before finals. thankfully, the cancer was caught really early so it is highly treatable, but learning about the diagnosis was still a form of emotional brokenness that i had not experienced before. i’ve always relied on my mom in a lot of ways, and the diagnosis was really difficult for me to process. in week ten, we watched a video about kintsugi pottery2 and how we can create something beautiful out of brokenness. one way i can relate the concept of kintsugi to what i am currently experiencing is the way that i’ve formed an even stronger bond with my mom. we have always been very close, and have become even closer while i’ve been here at school. when she starts her treatments over winter break, i will be there for her like she has always been there for me. i have encountered an incredible community at notre dame this semester, especially the community in my residence hall. in week eleven, one article that we read talked about how community is “a gift to be received and not a goal to be achieved.”3 keeping this in mind, i’ve realized that having the gift of my residence hall community in particular is such a blessing. throughout the struggles i have undergone this semester, the community in ryan hall was something that really grounded me and brought me joy. i love being the wellness commissioner in my hall because i am able to plan events that bring people together and promote health and 3 “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven 2 “women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto network, moreau fye week ten wellbeing. i also love the community of ryan hall when we all come together for hall council on tuesday nights in our 2-4. right now, the 2-4 is decorated for christmas, which brings me so much joy. after returning from thanksgiving break, i was so excited to help decorate my section in ryan hall. i had a lot on my mindfinal exams, final paper, the stress about my mom, so decorating my section with christmas lights, red and green tissue paper, and ribbon with my ra was so much fun. i feel so blessed to have the gift of the ryan hall community. i have encountered hope during this semester and been able to maintain hope throughout the good times and bad. learning more about the pillars of a holy cross education4 during week twelve reminded me of how special of a place notre dame is. my education here is grounded in the hope that i will use my knowledge to make the world a better place. having a strong spiritual foundation has allowed me to maintain hope. in difficult times where hope is a challenge, i know i can turn to god in prayer for guidance and support. additionally, the faith community at notre dame, specifically my priest in ryan hall and spiritual life director in ryan hall, are incredible in helping me maintain a sense of hope. 4 “holy cross and christian education”, moreau fye week twelve img_6926.heic integration one discovering what makes me “me” root belief #1: i believe that my purpose is to support others. this belief stems from all of the ways in which i feel that i contribute positively to society. i have noticed that i tend to gravitate towards roles where i am doing something to help someone else. i have been a swim coach for two years now, and i have spent several years tutoring peers and younger students. i always find myself lending a helping hand to friends for whatever they might need, whether that is academic support, mental support, or something else. like brooks said in the video from week 2, “we happen to live in a society that favors adam 1, and often neglects adam 2,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i also strongly encourage that other people stand up for themselves, or learn to say no in a situation where they have every right to. in one of the videos, someone said, “you deserve to know what it feels like to be disrespected,” (“because i love you” by the one love foundation moreau fye week four). i try to make sure that all of the people that i care about understand that they should not be subjected to any sort of treatment that does not make them feel happy or safe. this belief has been affirmed by the parents of the kids that i coach, the students i have tutored, and my friends. i have been surprised by several parents going out of their way to thank me for the hard work that i put in to help run practices, and for the improvement they have seen in their kids. one of the students that i tutored would always comment that my methods actually helped her become a better learner, and it was also affirmed by the confidence i saw grow in her throughout our time working together. my friends affectionately call me “mama grace,” not only because it’s a funny nickname, but also because i am always offering my support and advice, and serving as someone my friends can depend on. root belief #2: i believe that i am meant to be different from others. this belief stems from the journey i have been on thus far. for the places i have grown up in, i have almost always found myself in the minority as a woman of color. like george ella lyon said, “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on,” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). while being a minority is often hard, i have gained so many positive experiences, and i have built up a lot of strength and resilience from the not-so-positive experiences. i can also connect this to what father pete said about how, “there is such a thing as a healthy ego, but we’re talking here about egocentricity, an unhealthy sort of self-love that flatters us with the idea that everything in the world revolves around us,” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week three). we have to understand that people will have differing opinions from our own, and we need to be mindful of other people’s experiences. i always listen to what someone has to say, especially when they have experienced something that i am not knowledgeable about, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois and i often wish that more people understood this concept. i also dislike many of the societal standards that women are held to, like the idea that you have to shave every day to be more feminine, and that working out to become strong is bad. i disagree with both of these, and i have made it a point to myself to consciously think about my actions, and think about whether i am doing certain things because i want to do them, or if i have been led to believe by others that i should do them. to take a quote from father kevin grove, “the second notre dame, our notre dame, began as a response to the failures of the first one,” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five). another way in which i feel i differ from others is that i am choosing to pursue a field that is different from my parents, and different from what some people think i should be doing. i believe that to be happy in life, we need to pursue something that we actually enjoy, and unfortunately i think that many people feel that they are unable to pursue their career of choice. i have learned from the “failures” of people who are unhappy with their lives because of their jobs, and i am making sure that i do something different. this belief has been affirmed by my conversations with other people. i have found that i usually think differently than others on at least one of these topics, and this usually leads to discussion about these differences. i try to have these constructive conversations because i think it is important to explore why we all have the opinions that we do. root belief #3: i believe that i grow by making strong connections with others. this belief stems from the ideas that i have gathered from my best friends and also from my family. something i find myself doing often is having conversations about very important topics like race, mental health, and feminism with my closest friends. my friends, olivia and izzy, and i often discuss anxiety, which affects both of them. i have learned a lot from my two best friends about their own experiences, and they have helped me create a more informed opinion about mental health. as brooks said in his talk, “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths, adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). my friends have helped me grow as a person by sharing their experiences, strengths, and weaknesses with me. olivia and i also frequently talk about our experiences as mixed-race women of color, and while we share that in common, i have also been able to better understand a perspective other than my own. chimamanda ngozi adichie said that, “i realized that people like me, girls with skin the color of chocolate, whose kinky hair could not form ponytails, could also exist in literature,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). in one of my best friends i found someone similar to me, but someone from whom i could learn. i think that what brené brown said about how “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen,” is also very relevant to this, because i was able to become so close with my friends by https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story being vulnerable with them (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe that this belief can be affirmed in the ways i know that i have grown as a person, and the ways others have seen me grow. during middle school i may not have completely understood these heavy topics and known how to deal with them, but i often find myself able to better speak about these things. i have become more aware of the fact that if someone says something hurtful toward a certain person or group of people, you must be the one to stand up and tell them that it is not okay. i try my very best to be the person to speak up in these situations. my friends and i share these beliefs, and together we try to combat these unfortunate cases. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 moreau integration 2 moreau fye oh the semester has flown one of the most important questions i’ve asked myself this semester is what my goals were and if they were realistic. i have always struggled with expecting too much of myself or trying to make myself fit into the expectations of others. when i came into college i had this idea of the perfect student, who does all of these activities and clubs, gets perfect grades, and plays on a varsity athletic team all while maintaining an active social life. i had this expectation that i would be able to do all of these things, but when i actually got to college i realized that not only were the classes difficult, so was the time commitment for clubs and i never got the opportunity to walk on to the varsity golf team. i had to take a few weeks to realize that maybe these all weren’t exactly things that i wanted, but more were things that i thought others expected of me. “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). this quote from this article really spoke to me, especially in this context. i realized that it was okay to be imperfect and that as long as i put in a lot of effort to do things that i really cared about it didn’t matter what other people thought. personally, i thought that the best part about being in college is that my parents weren’t there to constantly see what i was doing, meaning that the onus was on me to put effort into the things that i really wanted to do. i think that this added freedom aspect helped me to realize that some of the things that i did in high school were a product of trying not to disappoint them rather than doing something that i actually enjoyed. my biggest takeaway from all this was that firstly i need to take responsibility for my expectations and make sure they are realistic. secondly, i learned that outside expectations are just noise that you have to tune out because if you focus too much on them you can lose your true goals. as an international student, i feel that i place much greater importance on my roots and my homeland. my first experience at notre dame was meeting the international students during international orientation, but when i actually integrated into the student body i could feel the lack of diversity a little more. i felt this a little amplified because i am not a catholic, i felt a little left out when all of my friends went for mass on sundays and i didn’t attend due to my personal beliefs. i found comfort however in the welcoming and accepting nature of everyone at this school. this is best characterized by this quotation: “namely, a genuine recognition of our common humanity as created in the likeness and image of god.” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten). i thought this quote was a brilliant description of the way i felt accepted at notre dame. the ideas of https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 moreau fye family and community fostered by notre dame are prominent if you experience life as a student at notre dame. at notre dame people are more respectful of their differences and have the curiosity to learn about other cultures and traditions. despite being an agnostic i can be included in all events at the university, this makes me appreciative of the values that notre dame as an institution is built on, values of accepting people from different backgrounds and faiths. yes, i sometimes feel like i am a foreigner in a faraway land, but i choose to look at that as a positive. it brings me closer to my roots and makes me proud to be from singapore. i always believed that my passion within engineering was computers, but once i joined the notre dame formula sae racing team this belief was questioned. i went in with a love for computer programming and hardware, but the more i explored this club and got really into the literature provided i began to question this. i was placed on the engine team and talking about cars, engine output, and turbocharging had me really excited. however, i still had a love for computers and i wasn’t sure whether i was either in the wrong major or the wrong subsystem team within my club. there was a point at which i was feeling really hopeless and i had no idea what kind of classes i wanted to take during the second semester, or if i should swap the team i was in within the club. it was then that i realized something best said by this quotation “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know.” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). i need to put myself outside my comfort zone and feel hopeless to come to a realization about what i truly want. my passion for engineering isn’t black or white, computer or mechanical. my interests are more nuanced and it is a hybrid. i like to work with computers and code but i also enjoy the challenge of getting my hands dirty and trying to construct an engine for a racecar. i realized it is possible to have more than one passion in a field, and instead chose to leverage my club members to learn something that i might not have been able to from my major. most of my friends are not hugely similar to me in terms of age or background. most of them are from the us and are between 18 and 19 years old. i am a 21-year-old ex-military kid from singapore. this leads to some dissimilar experiences and causes a little bit of difference of opinion in the way i think and act in comparison to them. the particular instance that first comes to mind when i think about this is the views on war and conscription that they had. i was all for it, having done the training and felt the patriotism of donning the uniform. some of my friends, however, were talking about diplomacy as a better solution for international conflict and it led to a bit of a heated discussion. it was only when i actually argued against one of their points in a moreau fye philosophy paper only to get a grade less than expected that i realized the benefit of having dissimilarities and how it can strengthen our bonds with people. “but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). it is clear to me now that having people around with whom you have a strong personal bond despite dissimilarities is the most important thing when trying to develop as a person. if you fail and there is nobody to help pick you up it takes even more effort to be able to have the willpower to force yourself to pick yourself up. it is much better to work with someone to solve a difficult problem than to try and go at it alone. the most important thing is that without others, it is unlikely we will have the correct environment to succeed, and being able to leverage an environment of dissimilarity and come out together better is extremely important. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ professor taylor moreau 15 october 2021 glad i’m still growing i wanted to have everything figured out by the start of college, to understand myself fully and simply develop the person i was to help the people i cared for. however, although my core beliefs have not switched while in college i have come to realize that they have shifted and will continue to move throughout my life as i grow. keeping an open mind with this course has enabled me to really inspect where my values stand and how i can act to improve them. my experiences at notre dame, especially those i’ve had with other people and with my own limitations have affirmed my beliefs. i feel more confident than ever to say that finding healthy emotional relationships is essential to satisfying lifestyle. i know that although everybody is different, we are united in our humanity, and the more we know about ourselves, the good and the bad, the better we will be able to achieve our goals. during my time in this radically new and brilliant school, i have seen my beliefs that human connection is essential to fulfillment, everybody is similar in their differences, and self-knowledge is the engine to true success grow along with me. first, i believe that it is essential to connect with others to live happily, but i have learned that vulnerability is the best way to get close and not every relationship is healthy. i have always been a very social, extroverted person. i valued my relationships with my good high school friends and with my family, yet these relationships matured over many years and came very naturally. when i arrived at notre dame, i knew i needed to find people to connect with, but i was at a loss at how to form these relationships as an adult. i decided to employ the bold, confident vulnerability i had learned from dr. brene brown in order to connect with people. in a comment about her findings from experimentation on vulnerability, dr brown says, “people that have a strong sense of love and belonging believe that they are worthy of love and belonging . . . [and people that had this strong sense of belonging] had the courage to be imperfect. . . they fully embraced vulnerability, they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0) this statement she made about how people found a sense of belonging and true happiness by engaging in a vulnerable way with other people reveals the true richness of human interaction. everybody derives a huge sense of fulfillment from having good relationships, and at notre dame i’ve been quick to open up to people to get an honest connection. i’ve told people about things i love and things that challenge me, and when they open up right back i’ve been able to have some of the best conversations of my life. one night in particular stands out, when my ordinarily quiet roommate talked to me about their concerns about dating after i had admitted i struggled with finding a more committed relationship. hence, i’ve been able to find some of the best connections of my life by not being afraid of who i am and what my flaws are. i’ve experienced reaffirming feelings of belonging after trying to be more open. however, vulnerability wasn’t the only thing i learned about here either. unfortunately i had a rather difficult relationship with a very kind person who had severe communication issues. before in my life i hadn’t met somebody that i had wanted to get closer to but regretted it when i did. i believe it’s important to recognize that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t” (“5 signs your in a toxic friendship” by olivia t taylor moreau fye week 4 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105932). i thought if i just interacted in an honest way with this person that the issues would work themselves out, but over time the problems only grew bigger and i got more stressed about saving the friendship. neither of us were growing together, we seemed to weight each other down and i realized that the relationship was making both me and the other person unhappy because it wasn’t working, and i decided that it would be better for both of us just to have some space. exactly like the quote, i was putting too much energy into a relationship that was not going to succeed. before coming to notre dame i had never experienced anything like that, and i assumed that i could work past other peoples issues if i put in enough effort. however i allowed my flawed expectations to change rather than hurt myself and somebody else. my experiences both pleasant and unpleasant with the people of this campus, have only reinforced my belief that your connections with other people are of the utmost importance for your sense of safety and comfort in any setting. i’m so glad that i was able to open up to more people and understand when a relationship is hurting people it’s neither a bad idea nor morally objectionable to disentangle oneself. i believe one of the reasons relationships are so fulfilling is because i believe people are more similar as humans than they are different. my concept of the beauty of diversity has greatly expanded after seeing so many different yet equally motivated people around me. previously i thought i went to a pretty diverse high school, because there were people born in different countries and some could even speak a different language than me. while this was a good experience, it could not prepare me to the thrill of notre dame’s diverse student body. almost each and every person is not afraid to be themselves and tell their story in a way the kids at my high school had not quite yet gained the confidence to do. everybody here has a different opinion, a different perspective, whether it’s the place they grew up or the environment they were raised in or what their core values are. talking to my highly conservative roommate and my highly liberal hallmate at the same time about what they want for america late at night gives me inspiration about what we can accomplish together even if we disagree on what methods to use. everytime i hear a new, full perspective it reminds me of the words of chimamanda adichie: “the consequence of the single story is . . . it emphasizes how we are different, rather than how we are similar” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie fye week 7 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next). before i came to notre dame, most people other than my closest friends were afraid to tell me more than a single story about themselves, and consequently, i appreciated the diversity of people around me without getting the full picture. here i’ve been awed at how many different people from different places can be so similar in their drive for a better life, and a better world. it’s a thrill to see how similar we all are and appreciate the likenesses that supersede our fascinatingly different backgrounds. at notre dame i shifted from trying to know how people are different from me to appreciate their differences to seeing how their differences only prove our overwhelming similarities. one of ay i am similar to many people here is that i believe the more we know about ourselves in totality, good and bad, the more powerful we become. before coming to notre dame i only wanted to focus on growing the parts of myself i admired and i didn’t know how to acknowledge my weaknesses or even strengths that didn’t fit my own self-concept. i was very shocked when we took the personality strengths test and my highest skill was spirituality, because i never thought of my strong convictions of my purpose in life as a faith or a hope i had. i had constrained spirituality to organized religion and ignored how to use my strong moral convictions to reinforce my work ethic and drive myself forward to my goal. i didn’t think of strong spirituality as something i could use and grow and explore in myself even though it made sense and was something i had always known in the back of my mind. over the past few weeks, i’ve hit some times where it was difficult to find purpose for it, and in these moments of weakness i look to my convictions about how i need to share my talents with the world to improve it to keep going. whenever i doubt myself i remind myself that i have power within just by my human spirit. a second thing i’ve been able to come to terms with at notre dame is that my childhood wasn’t perfect. when writing my “where i come from” poem, i wanted everything to be happy and nostalgic, but i realized that there were things that were painful to remember even though the majority of my childhood was spectacular. instead of ignoring the bad, i started to examine how those experiences affected me. my mom’s good intentioned emotional manipulation has really made me cautious about how connected i become with people, and my experiences in high school as a transition from homeschooling has taught me that i am a multifaceted person even though i often caved to peer pressure to change my behavior. but knowing these things is way better than letting them affect me insidious and hidden because i cannot confront them. notre dame has given me the space from my home to see that although my childhood was far from perfect, i am a truly blessed person for being able to turn all the good to my advantage. acknowledging my strengths and weaknesses will teach me how to take care of myself on a very personal level and accomplish my goals. all togehter, i believe notre dame has allowed me to give myself the grace to grow as a person. i have learned how to use vulnerability to connect with others and how to allow myself to leave toxic relationships. i have met and heard full stories from multitudes of students that remind me of humanity’s overwhelming commonality. and finally i have studied more than just my favorite and idolized strengths to gain motivation, and now understand the power of knowing my weaknesses. all of these things speak of change within me, but all of these changing facets of my understanding of myself and the people around me are the result of a new environment. i do not need to completely find myself like i did in high school, i am confident in my flexible identity because i have so much evidence around me on campus that people with different backgrounds and personalities are just the same as i am. i can accept myself because i seek to do the right thing in how i interact with other people, and i accept everybody around me. i believe i will continue to change at notre dame, because i am constantly adding new beliefs that enrich and improve the old beliefs. i am so excited to be in such a diversely similar community in which i can find fulfilling friendships and explore myself to become the best version of myself. intigration 2 the challenge what have i encountered, and how will i respond? when thinking about this prompt, i was drawn to one answer that sums up my college experience thus far; challenge. coming to college in august, i expected a challenge like none before. still, i never expected this to go far beyond academics. everything from social life to time management, study habits, and scholars has been a challenge. but how we respond to challenges is the most crucial decision we can make. coming out of a small high school in mid-michigan, i expected college to be this incredibly social group of young adults. everyone says they wish they could go back and relive the glory days, so i had high expectations. to say that my expectations came true is a complicated response. yes, kids are very social, but i am not, and the first few months just felt like an extension of high school where i had one or two friends but struggled to expand and meet new people. it's a challenge for me to allow people into my life where i trust them enough to get to know them. at the same time, i see others have this ability to talk and relate to others on a level i am incapable of reaching. but how to respond? how can i or do i tear these mental walls down so that i can meet new people? i found that being your authentic self attracts people similar to you. if i don't try and be someone i am not, i start to attract quality friends rather than a quantity of people. with regards to all this, i've discovered a great diversity of people on campus, not really in race and ethnicity but in personality. unlike, high school there aren't just two sects; there are so many more groups that i can fit into and immerse myself with others. in week 11, we heard a student named nobel says, "but what's even better is… they get to create a story that's never ever existed here on campus." ("with voices true snapshot summary" by the klue centermoreau fye week eleven) i want to make my story unique and perfect for me, where i'm not enslaved to social norms like in high school but instead do what i like and meet people who make me stronger. this will be a challenge, and i will struggle like never before, but it will be well worth it in the end. during my high school years, time management was always a challenge for me. i found that i would push things off until the last day they were due, even doing homework during lunch the day it was due. understanding that this is one of my biggest struggles, i figured it was something i needed to work on in college. however, this has been an immense challenge, something i'll probably struggle with for the rest of my life; i have this terrible tendency to push things back until they are due and lack the motivation to do anything until it's due the next day, for example, i am currently writing this integration friday morning, is that healthy? absolutely not. with time management being one of my biggest challenges these past few months, i've tried to respond by setting planned periods where i study so that i don't push everything back. just like in ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by the grotto networkmoreau fye week ten), i am trying to better myself by building better time management habits. also, like the women who put on the kintsugi workshops, i am trying to work with other students to better both myself and them in our laziness and bad habits by being proactive and finishing work well before due dates. https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ one final challenge i have encountered in the past few months here is the rigorous academic standards; while on my gateway tour, someone said that this was just an extension of high school and that they had an easy time; myself, not so much. to address this challenge, i have adopted many tactics, such as studying longer, meeting with ta's and professors, and working with others to better understand what is being taught. however, sometimes the rigorous courses get to me. i feel this sense of imposter syndrome, kind of like we addressed in ("what is imposter syndrome" by tedmoreau fye week nine), where i don't belong because i am struggling academically to be here. this weighs heavily upon me as i am surrounded by many very intelligent people. still, i have very different learning styles than others, and i am here for a reason. it's nothing new to know that notre dame is a very rigorous university. still, sometimes i get trapped in this idea that i am inferior to others here and compare myself because of grades or whatever, but then i remember that there are plenty of things i am good at myself, that is unique, i've never been the best statistically speaking but in areas such as engineering, not math, but conceptual modeling i find my abilities. in conclusion, i've had to face many challenges in the past few months here at college, some incredibly difficult and some reality small; however, how we overcome these challenges is what counts. sometimes it's hard to feel like this is the right path and to know that yore doing alright, but just like rev. james b. king says in ("holy cross and christian education" by rev. james b. kingmoreau fye week twelve) hope is "trusting in the cross and god's promise of the kingdom." and that god has a plan, a plan that requires us to do our part but a plan nonetheless. god works through us by giving us obstacles and trial and tribulation. and whenever we address a challenge head-on, we will overcome them just like in luke 1:37, "for with god nothing is impossible" with this in mind, no challenge is too great for the two of us; not even an integration paper that needs to be submitted in 8 hours. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28124/files/192714?module_item_id=109541 i believe a testimony of the saving grace of god i have changed quite a bit since coming to notre dame. while i do not think that my core beliefs have been changed, i think that what i already knew to be true has been solidified, and it is this: i believe that god is present in my life in every possible way. this has always been true for me. however, i never truly understood it until i realized how fully dependent i am on him. he has shown me his presence in so many ways, and once i began to see him in my daily life and in people across whom i came, i could not stop seeing him everywhere. “connection is why we’re here” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). brown tells us that our purpose on this earth is to come closer to other human beings, for our souls to be connected with those of others. however, while my heart is filled with love for so many of the wonderful souls across whom i have come at notre dame, my fear of people prevented me from forming any true connections with others. i believe that there is “something about me, that if other people know it or see it, that i won’t be worthy of connection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). it requires vulnerability to become close to another person, but in fear of showing myself to others, i push people away. however, one month ago, god sent me a reminder of the power of vulnerability recently through one of my professors. i was grieving a lost friend, and had just tried to drop his class because of how much i was struggling in it. however, the professor changed my mind by showing me vulnerability. he told me about how he, too, was struggling at the time, and he told me that he, too, was grieving. but he told me to just keep smiling and how it is okay to just take everything one step at a time. in that moment, he had allowed himself to be “seen, really seen,” and in doing so, i lost all of my fear (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i felt truly connected to him at that moment and i feel immensely grateful for him for his allowing himself to be vulnerable. vulnerability is a powerful tool, and i believe that it is through vulnerability, through showing our true selves to others, and allowing others to be open and honest with us, that we are able to love the human beings with which we inhabit this earth. my fear of people makes it difficult for me to cross the threshold of acquaintanceship to relationship. because i believe there is a part of me that is incapable of being loved, i will settle for relationships that are not built on love but on power and control. i was quite literally a punching bag for my best friend in elementary school, a way for her to release whatever anger or hurt was inside her, and i lied to my mother about where the bruises and cuts came from. in high school, i was my best friend’s emotional support, but was shown no love in return. it is true that “‘attention is one of the rarest forms of love,’” but i was only shown attention when i was needed and never when i was in need (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). however, god has sent some wonderful people during my time at notre dame, people that i call his “little angels on earth.” they are people who have continued to try and get through to me even though i tried to push them away out of fear. most of these people are in choir with me, because the harmonies we sing will always connect our souls in worship even if we aren’t directly speaking to one another. these kind souls have reminded me that i never walk alone, even if i’m not close enough with anyone yet to call it a friendship. all of these people have brought me closer to god without even knowing it, without even knowing that whenever they show kindness to me, they are serving jesus. i hope god grants these special people many gifts in life and rewards in heaven, and i pray for them daily. one such angel introduced me to the litany of humility. i have been praying this simple prayer a lot whenever i feel lonely, especially the part that says “from the desire of being loved, deliver me, jesus” (litany of humility). it reminds me that my purpose here is to love and not to be loved, and that the only love i need is god’s. therefore, i try to show love as much as i can to others, even if i am still afraid of them, and i believe that love can connect any soul with another, even if we are not consciously connected through friendship. the same angel who introduced me to the litany of humility also introduced me to saint thérèse of lisieux. now, i had already known about saint thérèse previously, but since they have the same name, one day by chance i said to myself, “theresa is so nice. i wonder if she’s named after saint thérèse the little flower.” i then realized that i did not know much about saint thérèse, and thus decided to google her. that day, october 1, happened to be saint thérèse’s feast day, and my heart was instantly moved. it had been a day full of hard work and strife, and saint thérèse’s idea that every little thing could be offered as a sacrifice, as a prayer to god, changed my perspective of the suffering my workload caused me. my adam i and adam ii became one, and i began to see all the work that i did, every sleepless night, every essay, every homework problem, every ounce of caffeine, as not only a sacrifice to be offered up to jesus, but a gift from him as well. my eulogy virtues are now able to help me with my resume virtues, and my resume virtues bring me closer to god. the “two sides of my nature” are no longer “at war with each other,” and i can strive for success without losing the gentleness my heart desires (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that being one’s authentic self can only be found in god, and we therefore must incorporate him into every little sacrifice and every gift each day offers, and that he cannot be separated from our work lives. it is for this reason that the education of the mind and heart are not separated at notre dame. we are at notre dame because we are to make the world a better place with our education, learning not just for ourselves but for others. we are all here for a reason, and that reason is that we have potential for doing good in this world. yet, my ideas for what my future will look like are uncertain, and i am filled with great anxiety pursuing the unknown. what helps is for me to think back to a time when notre dame was only an idea, yet still had great potential. father sorin said in his letter to blessed basil moreau that “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (“letter to bl. basil moreau” by father sorin moreau fye week five). how did he know what the future would look like for notre dame? the answer lies in hope. “everything was frozen, and yet it all appeared so beautiful. the lake, particularly, with its mantle of snow, resplendent in its whiteness, was to us a symbol of the stainless purity of our august lady, whose name it bears, and also of the purity of soul which should characterize the new inhabitants of these beautiful shores” (“letter to bl. basil moreau” by father sorin moreau fye week five). even in the bleakness of winter, father sorin was still able to see the potential for good that this place had. the ability to find hope even when pursuing the unknown, even when there is absolutely nothing in the present that looks like the future, comes from a trust in god. he is eternal, outside of time, and can see both the past and future. he has a plan for us, for the good we will do, just as he knew what this school would become the winter that father sorin wrote to blessed basil moreau. for this reason, my anxiety for the future is replaced by hope, because i believe that the future is in god’s hands, and it is not up to us to control and predict the outcomes of his plan. “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyonmoreau fye week six). i can say without a doubt that what formed me is my family. they are the material on which i draw my entire life. i don’t know why i’m so close with them or why i felt no need to leave the nest and be away from them. perhaps it has something to do with being separated at an early age from my parents after my brother was born sick, and they had to be away with him at all times while also keeping me away from other children to prevent outside germs from coming in. perhaps ever since i have been striving back towards them. or perhaps i am just so incredibly blessed to have such a wonderful family that gets along so well, where all the birds in their little nests agree. nevertheless, i do whatever i can to please them, and they take me places my own ambition cannot. i will go wherever they send me, however far away, if it brings me closer to them. i believe that where we are from is our homes: the people, places, and things which formed and nurtured us to be the people we are today. it connects us to our cultures, our childhoods, our selves, and it is where we find our attachment. for me, i will always attach myself to my parents and two brothers, and the lessons they taught me about how a family is supposed to love is something that i will carry with me in whatever families i find or create in the future. the beauty of all of us being from different places and coming from different homes is that everyone’s worldview is unique. everyone’s perspective is different, and multiple perspectives are always needed when it comes to problem-solving. however, it is because of our pride that many of us believe that our perspectives are the best. we become irritated by those with whom we disagree and think about how much easier life would be if everyone were similar to us. we believe that we are better than those who are different and instead of loving them, we intentionally or unintentionally group these people into our “others” and give them a single story. it is because of pride that we are so disconnected from our others. “the real problem is in our system of producing shared stories. if a country can’t tell narratives in which everybody finds an honorable place, then righteous rage will drive people toward tribal narratives that tear it apart” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooksmoreau fye week seven). in order to create shared stories with our others, we must step down from our pedestals of thinking our perspective is the best. we must realize that no one person is above another in the eyes of god, and that our perspectives are shaped by where we’re from and not from moral superiority or inferiority. in doing so, we are answering god’s call to love one another and recognize everyone as our brothers and sisters in christ. i believe that love and humility are the only things we need in order to find our shared stories. the biggest impact notre dame has had on me is on my faith. i was not particularly catholic growing up, since the only other catholics in my family are my two brothers, my mother, and my grandmother. i was also taught that my catholic faith was something of which to be ashamed, since many of my friends in school expressed their dislike of catholics and catholicism to me, teaching me to believe catholics are bad people. however, notre dame exposed me to the wonderful world of catholic liturgy and music. the masses i attended at home did not have music, so it is here that i have found a completely new means by which to worship god. what stands out to me here is that no one here is judgemental about the fact that i do not know as much about catholicism as everyone else. they do not make me feel guilty for being confused about the order of the mass, for never having prayed the stations of the cross before, for not knowing the words to “salve regina,” or for loving to read the book of common prayer. i have never before felt such joy when my alarm goes off on sunday morning or have felt such sorrow walking home from mass. however, it was not just the additional exposure to catholicism that shaped my faith since coming here. in the words of dorothy day, “most cradle catholics have gone through, or need to go through, a second conversion which binds them with a more mature love and obedience to the church” (reflections during advent by dorothy day). while i believe my second conversion happened when i was twelve, i think i am in the process of another now, and i think this is due to increased stress and anxiety about the future. the realization that god is in complete control, that he has a plan, and that everything happens for a reason, is something that i thought i believed but did not really believe until now. two months ago, even though my days were filled with leisure and calm, my heart was in torture. every act of devotion was just another box to check off, another piece of work to do. i did not have a solid relationship with god, and i could not hear him speak to me. i was filled with a fear of hell but did not have a love for god. it was when i was left alone in an unfamiliar environment, in the depths of despair and loneliness, that my heart finally opened up to god. i finally realized that i am his, and i ardently desire to grow in my relationship with him now instead of just ticking off boxes. while i’m planning on not taking as many credits next semester (i’m liberating myself from vocal performance… lmm is the move), and while the once unfamiliar environment finally feels like a safe space to me, i will always be so grateful for the difficulty i have experienced this semester, because while it killed my body, it saved my soul. i see the world in a completely different way now. everything and everyone is so much more beautiful, every strife is just another cross to bear to bring me closer to him, and all my anxiety about the future is laid to rest. “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, moreau fye week three). my mind has certainly been transformed in a very short period of time. it was not through my own strength but through his that i found him. in the words of saint augustine, “our heart is restless until it rests in you” (augustine, confessions) my once restless heart is finally at peace. if nothing else were true, if everything i believe is false, then it does not matter, because god is the ultimate truth. this i believe with my whole heart, and it is the root belief that is at the center of my being, from which all other beliefs stem. i’d like to say that i am at the beginning of my journey. i want to continue to grow in love and commitment to god and continue making daily sacrifices in his name, making myself less and him greater. i want to continue to love the other people i come across, and to hopefully one day find a deeper connection with them. my ultimate goal for everyday is simply to love, because love is what makes everything else i want to achieve possible. love is the only thing we carry with us from life when our lives come to an end, and it makes the world so much more beautiful. sources: brené brown, “the power of vulnerability” olivia t. taylor, “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” litany of humility david brooks, “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” father sorin, “letter to bl. basil moreau” george ella lyon, “where i’m from” david brooks, “how to destroy truth” dorothy day, reflections during advent professor david fagerberg, “faith brings light to a dark world” st. augustine, confessions myfe integration 2 how the act of encountering has helped me grow at notre dame since coming to notre dame, i have definitely felt like i have encountered many societal expectations or general expectations held by my peers. oftentimes, i find these expectations to have negative effects. “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you. you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). i feel like so many people do things just to live up to people’s expectations of them, but it’s not something that actually makes them happy. at the end of the day, you have control over your own life. it is your choice on how to be happy and healthy and not someone else’s. an example of an expectation that i have encountered is going out every weekend and partying even though that’s something that doesn’t necessarily make me happy. instead of living up to people’s expectations and being miserable, i decide to choose other things to do that make me happier. another expectation that i have encountered and am continuing to interact with is the expectation of going into investment banking after graduation because that is what many finance majors do, and it makes a lot of money. although i don’t have much experience with investment banking, i have a mindset that if i feel like i don’t enjoy it by graduation, i won’t decide to go into that field even though it’s the expectation that people have for many finance majors. i would rather pick a career that is more fulfilling for me. in the future, i will continue to try to de-emphasize the expectations that others have of me because i am going to be miserable if those expectations don’t align with what makes me happy. something else that i have encountered since coming to notre dame is brokenness. everybody has gone through unique experiences, some of them good and some of them bad, but that shapes people into who they are. many people are ashamed of all their flaws and past negative experiences, but that must not keep them from growing into a more dynamic person who is better from persevering through their experiences. “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). i believe that this also applies to the community. generally speaking, when people think of notre dame, they think of a great institution that has many areas of strength, and is a force for good in the world. this is what i thought of notre dame as well. while i still believe these things, being a student here has shed light on the not so pretty aspects of our community. however, that does not mean that the community cannot learn from its mistakes. i am trying to do my part in addressing this through joining the student government department of sustainability. there are so many things that the university can do better when it comes to being sustainable. the university may be ashamed of it but that doesn’t mean that it can just be thrown under the rug and left alone. us students in the department of sustainability are trying to call for the university to improve by, for example, calling for divestment of fossil fuels in the university’s endowment or offer more meat free https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ options at the dinings halls. i hope to continue to engage in similar clubs moving forward so that i can help address the brokenness of the university and help improve it into something good. encountering diversity at notre dame has definitely helped me grow as a person. “exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change” (“diversity matters” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). even though notre dame is known for historically not being very diverse, it is still much more diverse than the high school that i went to. for example, there are so many clubs that i saw at the club fair at the beginning of the year with differing viewpoints, and there were also a bunch of different cultural clubs. i believe that engaging with people who are different from you is so important to become a more educated person in general that can then be empowered to create change. learning more about different backgrounds is also a great way to become a person who is trying to limit the amount of implicit bias, stereotyping, and discrimination that may occur. one example of encountering a different viewpoint from my own was reading a rover article on a controversial subject. instead of disregarding the article based on the title, i made sure to read the whole thing. by reading the article, i was able to be exposed to new concepts and learn about why others think differently than me. because i chose to spend time learning about their perspective, i feel more assured that i can make a more educated decision on my own stance on the topic. in the future, i will continue to avoid limiting myself to interacting with certain groups of people/people who only agree with my viewpoints. i will strive to share my perspective but focus just as much on listening to others. finally, i have found that encountering hope during low points is very important. “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by james b. king moreau fye week 12). when things are not going great, it is very hard to change your view of the situation. however, the times when we doubt things are especially the times when we have to start having extra faith in our abilities, our community, etc. this creates hope. when we find hope, we become stronger and more resilient to challenges. when i got a bad exam grade, i began to have very negative thoughts, but i was able to change my mindset in a way that makes me more determined to do well on the final. it creates motivation and ultimately changes my view on setbacks like these. i will strive to continue creating hope like this during rough times. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ martin, integration two professor helm fys 10101 3 december 2021 lessons from notre dame encounters i have encountered imposter syndrome, but i will not let feelings of self-doubt prevent me from becoming the best version of myself. when i applied to notre dame, i did so with the belief that the university had a fifty-percent acceptance rate. had i known of the prestidge of the university, i would have never applied because i would never have considered myself someone worthy of such high academic achievement. however, after applying, i was accepted, but i was even more surprised at my acceptance as the hesburgh-yusko scholar, the oldest merit scholarship offered at notre dame. i am now placed among a lineage of students who are some of the best and brightest to leave the university, and all of my fellow first-year hesburh-yusko scholars have achieved unfathomable success in their respective countries and academic interests. many times i feel as though i am not worthy to be among them, and i resonate with the experiences of albert einstein from the ted-ed video which stated, “he [albert einstein] described himself as an ‘involuntary swindler’ whose work didn’t deserve as much attention as it had received,” ("what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). when i first arrived on campus, i formed a nasty habit of comparing myself to other students in order to validate my presence on campus. in emery bergmann youtube video depicting the harsh realities of the college experience, she expressed, “loneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self criticism: ‘i can’t find my place among these people, so it must be my fault,’” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). i became incredibly https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html isolated from other students because instead of spending my free time making friends, i was worried about proving myself to everyone that i belonged. i didn’t start to make true friendships until i started to talk about the way i was feeling about not being a good enough student, advocate, or individual for notre dame. what i found was that other first-year hesburgh-yusko scholars felt the exact same way, and the ted-ed video described this as, “a phenomenon known as pluralistic ignorance, where we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts,” ("what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). it is difficult to communicate your feelings or self-doubt at an institute that prides itself on procuring some of the best and brightest minds from around the world, but once we talk about these emotions, we are able to become better together. since finding a true community within my scholarship, i am becoming a more self-assured student with more confidence to pursue opportunities i would have previously thought i was not capable of receiving. i am becoming the best version of myself. i have encountered minority voices, and i will be a microphone in the community to amplify their voices and ideas. another aspect of my scholarship community is the friends i have been able to foster with students from incredibly different cultural, racial, and educational backgrounds. through conversations with these students, i have found ways in which our lives intersect in ways i would have never imagined. in a conversation with one student, we both discussed how we sometimes feel uncomfortable talking to people at notre dame who come from the same towns as us because they come from private school and wealthy backgrounds, and they know that the student and i do not. i come from a background of majority minority and title i schools, and the student i was talking to related to this experience as well. we both have encountered other people https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo throughout our college experience who think we have somehow cheated the system or that we’re only here because the school views us as “a statistic”. similarly, assistant professor of english francisco robles expressed in the klau with voices true 2020 snapshot summary video, “people truly didn’t think i would be anything but a landscaper. people knew that the grounds keepers or the janitor were latino or black, but whenever i did really well on anything…the way people would cut me down is always by telling me that my uncle and cousins were outside…so why was i not out there joining them,” (“2020 snapshot summary video” by klau center moreau fye week eleven). our experiences are circumstantially different but grounded in the same “us versus them” narrative that has too often been experienced by first-generation, low-income, and minority students. additionally, notre dame has exposed me to new ways of viewing the world. my friends from various countries on the african continent invited me to watch a movie with them one night about the rwandan genocide, and they did not choose a film that sugarcoated the horrible tragedies of the rwandan people or the grotesque lack of involvement from the international system. my friends have instilled a belief in me that people of privileged backgrounds must do more than simply be a bystander, and i later spoke up in support of the rwandan people during a discussion class for my international relations class. i agree with rev. christopher j. devron and his belief that, “white people don’t get a moral pass by simply refraining from overtly racist acts. rather, they must examine racial biases within systems; reflect on how they participate in and benefit from these biases; and then take deliberate action to change them,” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron moreau fye week ten). notre dame is constantly exposing me to new cultural, racial, and educational experiences outside my own, and i know i have a duty to raise my voice in solidarity with minority voices. https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 i have encountered voices of faith in my educational journey, and i will let their moral philosophies guide me in my academic and professional service. although i do not consider myself a religious person, i believe there are lessons to be learned from moral values religious bodies and individuals can offer in an educational setting. while being at notre dame, i have been shocked at the interconnectedness of religious pursuit and academic thought, specifically in my god and the good life class. many students and professors draw about religious scholarly writing to articulate ideas of philosophy and morality, and i think these ideas hold incredible value to how even non-religious people such as myself can conduct themselves on a daily basis. for example, in holy cross and christain education published by notre dame campus ministry, the text states, “intensified his [moreau] efforts to promote the kind of christian education that would more authentically and convincingly assert the church’s conviction that true knowledge and understanding inevitably rested upon the integration of reason with faith,” (“holy cross and christian education” by notre dame campus ministry moreau fye week twelve). for me, my faith is created by the morals i hold close to my heart that guide every action i take, and i agree with moreau’s ideas that we need to use our faiths in collaboration with our reason in order to be authentic individuals. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23747/files/187485/download?download_frd=1 integration one integration paper one believing my truths. beliefthe confidence in a concept or existence to be true regardless of how others interpret it. the word encompasses certainty, posing a challenge for me since i am a very indecisive person whose ideologies and beliefs are usually undefined. however, over the past eight weeks, i have found my set of concepts that i have determined to be certain. a core belief that i have acquired is the importance of vulnerability, and so i believe that it is essential to express ourselves. vulnerability is “the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging, and love.” according to brené brown, whose ted talk conceptualizes the strength in our emotions. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) . the perception of vulnerability is slandered by the idea that expressing emotions correlates to being “the core for shame, fear, and struggle for worthiness." i disagree with this ideology and believe that our feelings underline ways to make stronger connections within our community, being free of judgment. i am quite a vulnerable person and find solace in people who accept my vulnerability instead of rejecting it. i also feel my closest to people when confiding in them, inevitably leading to a closer community. relating to vulnerability, i believe that we should acknowledge our weaknesses and use our strengths to better the world. as part of my reflection for week two, my via survey revealed realities i had not known. at first, it was difficult to digest what i had tried to avoid coming to terms with, but the via survey confirmed the fact that one of my weaknesses was bravery. yet, this was a necessary revelation because it is only when we lose ourselves do we find who we truly are, at least according to david brooks, whose talk confirmed that i have been living an “atom 1” life. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two”) by acknowledging the presence of my weaknesses, i can work on myself https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim while accepting the fact that my failures are not the end of the road but rather the start of a more stable path. additionally, i can learn to escape the enclosures of an “atom 1 life”, and transcend my limitations to develop an “atom 2” lifestyle, living for others instead of myself. faith has always been a constant in my life, and from moreau, i have come to believe that my faith has and will continue to determine much of what i know to be true. fr. pete’s video during week three expresses the need for patience and structure in order to become our most authentic selves. (“the role of faith in our story.” by the notre dame campus ministry, fr. pete mccormick, c.s.cmoreau fye week three.) being raised in a spiritually divided household has allowed me to discover faith on my own rather than having it be something enforced onto me. although i have questioned the faith i profess today many times, especially when faced with difficulties, i remember the importance god plays in my life and the influence his presence has had on how i navigate my choices and beliefs. similar to my relationship with religion, i believe that building a substantial foundation is necessary when forming life-giving relationships. to me, a real relationship is more than just a one-way agreement and more of a two-way struggle. i have had the same group of friends for seven years, and in those years, two very fundamental characteristics we all shared were respect and trust. when respect is present in a relationship, friends and couples hold each other in high regard, creating equality, honesty, comfortability, and transparency. no true and worthy relationship is easy, and there will always be factors that challenge a relationship. however, the presence of a solid foundation can help resolve those factors. for instance, some of my closest friends now live miles away from me, but although distance acts as our challenge, we still maintain the same level of intimacy because we respect, trust and comfort each other. our years of developing a sturdy foundation have maintained the friendship we have today. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois forging life-giving friendships is just as important as forming life-giving habits. i believe that i am responsible for bringing “life out of death” by using my education and privileges to tackle and address the negatives of this world. i believe sharing our stories and experiences is imperative to creating a voice that conquers the injustices around us. in fr. kevin’s lecture, he expresses how notre dame was built for the purpose of making a change; to bring life to a society that was dying. (“two notre dames: your holy cross education.” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.cmoreau fye week five). through the education and resources i receive here, i hope to continue moving towards a society that is inclusive of all people and combats the prejudices people face every day. to do so, i must also remain unbiased and pursue the truth. i believe that i need to continue practicing open-mindedness, surrendering to the idea that my “truths” are always definite without considering the perspective of the other. everyone is entitled to their own opinion, and regardless of whether i agree with their views or not, i will always respect their voices. we as a nation have a moral obligation to better ourselves and the society which governs us, so we have to appreciate the different voices and stories that we have, becoming the epitome of uniqueness and love. because of the realities of our society, i am reminded of my belief in individuality and its importance today. 2021 notre dame laetare medalist carla harris put it best herself; “what counts is what you do for others, be fearless, and finally, be you.” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris.moreau fye week five). i have been subjected to the reality that everyone is trying to fit one mold. every day, we conform more to a criterion than express who we are as individuals. these realities are why i am so inspired by ms.harris’ speech, especially when she highlights how no one else can be a better me than myself, so i should be the best me i can be. my voice is unique, your voice is unique, everyone’s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 voice is unique, and i believe that now is time we start rejecting the idea of being the same person and accepting the reality that we are all different. i hope to continue reminding myself to be who i am and practice my truth rather than being who people expect me to be. these first few weeks of the moreau first year experience have solidified and confirmed the beliefs i didn't know i held before coming to notre dame. in the same way, each class has developed a new concept within me, keeping me open to the possibility of reevaluating what i already consider true while also forming new truths. i believe each reflection has elicited questions that have shaped me and my integration into college life, steering me on the right path that fits who i am the best. bibliography: “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks “the role of faith in our story.” by campus ministry, fr.pete mccormick, c.s.c “two notre dames: your holy cross education.” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 john graney community and the duality of life in the digital era our world has changed so much over the course of our lifetime; this new digital age that we are now a part of has brought a variety of things, both good and bad, into our lives. social media has the power to connect all of us in amazing ways. it can connect us from town to town, state to state, and country to country. however, the interconnectivity that it has brought has not been without its downfalls. we’ve seen social media used in much more recent history to divide our country between its two main political parties. moreover, social media has led to a large amount of deception and pressure as a result of people presenting lives that are not true to their lives in reality. social media has no greater influence than here on college campuses across america. in this moreau integration i am going to describe the things that i have experienced on account of social media, and i am going to describe what makes notre dame the great university that we know it as. approval is a concept that has been prevalent in our lives for quite some time, and this quote from julia hogan speaks to a new era of approval that we have found ourselves in. “don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). this concept of approval is something that is drilled into us every single day. some may think that as new college students, we have just made it through our most stressful era of approval in our lives, but in reality, the next step was just starting. following our approval into college, we all needed to find approval from those around us, and make friends in a completely foreign environment. everybody wants to be liked, and everybody wants to make friends, but the important thing to remember is that we do not need anyone's approval to live the lives that we want to lead. trying to present a fake side of yourself to people to gain their approval will only make you temporary friendships. however, once you let go of the need for approval, you can finally start to be yourself, and make friendships that will last a lifetime. in our era of social media, this idea of approval is also more prevalent than ever. you have to look good on your instagram posts so that special someone will follow you back, and you need to continue to get your followers approval or they will unfollow you. this outrageous system has consumed many young adults, and children in our world today and has led to the editing, and capturing of fake, temporary smiles. it is the realization of the falsehood that is social media that will finally allow for you to take a step away and realize that what the people on social media are showing off is nothing more than a facade meant to impress their extremely important followers. after looking at this aspect of what social media can bring, it is important we now look into some of its other effects. this next ripple that social media has caused is a major divide in our country. although this is not all as a result of social media, it has no doubt played a key role in our country’s divide between democrats and republicans. “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (wesley theological seminary commencement by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). this quote is taken from fr. john jenkins during his wesley theological seminary commencement in 2012. in his address father jenkins speaks about the divisions in our county that were feared by our founding fathers to cause tension within our country.our two party system has caused so much division and hatred within our country and smart men have known that a two party system would cause this division before the ink of our declaration of independence had even dried. as social tensions continue to rise to newer highs everyday, we are seeing our country become divided between democrats and republicans with hatred coming from both sides. i have seen the effects of this hatred first hand within my family. my grandmother on my mom’s side is extremely liberal and has been for a long time, while my grandparents on my fathers side are extremely conservative. the minute that politics makes its way into the dinner table, every other conversation taking place is swept away and the two sides begin to gear up for full on verbal warfare. a major reason for their seemingly crazed actions is caused by social media, and new programs that they are watching every second of every day. my grandmother on my mom's side lives and breathes msnbc while my father’s parents always have fox news running. the divide that these media outlets have caused in our country i am seeing firsthand within my own family. while these two points i have brought up hold legitimacy, i would be remiss if i did not bring in the interconnectivity that social media has also provided as it has allowed for us to find the communities that we belong in. “community does not depend on intimacy and must expand to embrace strangers, even enemies, as well as friends” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). community is where we find the people in which bonds can be created. i think that looking for connections through this lens of community is a great idea and it can be really helpful to take a step back and look at the bigger picture in terms of the way we are connected to others. with the help of social media, we can find communities of people with all sorts of similarities to ourselves, and we also find people with differing viewpoints than our own. both types of connections are equally important to the building of a greater community, and social media without a doubt has a lot of great characteristics that allow for these communities to be made. to finish off this integration, i would now like to get away from social media, but stay within the realm of community: the notre dame community. “a person’s capacity for lifelong discipleship is hard to predicate from exam results or resumes no matter how well formed he or she may be” holy cross and christian education by the campus ministry moreau fye week 12). notre dame has always represented a place apart from ordinary school systems. everywhere we go across the country we will find institutions that will inform us, and make us into smarter people; however, the university of notre dame represents something more and this quote speaks to its goal for us as students. the university of notre dame brings a great education and faith into the same community and it is truly what makes it stand out from the rest. when making my decision to come to the notre dame gateway program, i had a lot of doubts. both of my sisters went to notre dame before me, and i had never heard of the gateway program or what it represented. when it came to a decision, i was down to two schools: the notre dame gateway program or the university of miami. i visited miami with gorgeous sunshine, perfect weather, and the campus was beautiful. i thought after visiting that i had found my place to go. soon after that, however, i visited notre dame. i was taken on a tour in 0 degree weather with snow cutting at my face. even though these were the two conditions, the university of notre dame felt warmer that day. the overwhelming support that i knew that i would receive at the gateway program, and the continued guidance in my faith was the reason i decided to come here. i had hope that this great university would help form me into the man that i always wanted to become. three months later, i know that i am in the right place. integration 1 understanding the beliefs that have informed my knowledge often when one is asked to state their beliefs, they begin by affirming something along the lines of, “i believe that notre dame is the best university” or rather “i believe that burgers are better than hot dogs.” while there may be some truth to these statements, what we have here are statements of opinion rather than true self-beliefs. now that i’m eight weeks into my freshman year of college, i feel as though i have discovered and have grown to understand more of what i actually believe. to begin, i believe that i am searching for a community that will support me and help me to be my best self. during week one of moreau, we learned that “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe that they are worthy of love and belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). as an only child, being away from home for the first time forced me to find a new community of people i could trust, but most importantly find a community where i felt comfortable to just be myself. at first, i was unsure if i would find friends or people i could relate to, but with notre dame’s commitment to inviting students into their family i feel as though i have become not part of just one community, but welcomed into many. for example, i really love playing volleyball and at the student activities fair i was given the opportunity to try out for the club team. fortunately after many rounds of tryouts i made the team! as one of two freshmen, i was greatly welcomed to this small community of other volleyball players who support me in improving my playing skills as well as developing my leadership skills. this is just one community that i consider myself part of here at nd. i feel the same way about my dorm, its culture, and the people living there as well as other groups i’ve joined around campus. i will use this belief in order to create a welcoming community for others to join and feel welcomed into whether that be in sports, academics, student life, or just social life in general. my next thought is that i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by sharing my love with others and being my true self. for week two of moreau, we discussed the difference in virtues visible to others, those we put on our resume and those we would hear at our eulogy; more or less what we think people think about ourselves vs what they actually think/see. through david brooks' video we discovered that “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone.” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). what i believe he means here is that god created us to help each other become better people, to learn from one another, and form relationships. we need others to help us to discover our true selves. coming into college and a new environment not knowing anyone, to be able to make true friends i had to be my true self. as short of time as it has been, i feel as though i have formed life-forging relationships with the group of friends i have made all because i was my true self and they were accepting of me. it is a testament to knowing my self worth and something for the future to always be my true self because the real relationships i form come from those who love me for me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim i believe that my purpose in life is to discover my true self and be a light for others. during week three of moreau we learned that “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery, on this journey, success, productivity and failure are an afterthought, what truly matters is responding to the best of your ability as the person god has created you to be.” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). i found this quote extremely applicable to my calculus class. at the beginning of the semester i was doing well on homeworks, quizzes and other problem sets. i found the workload to be manageable and the content understandable. but then, come week 5, i was introduced to concepts that i really wasn’t understanding, i would spend hours doing homework and felt unprepared for some of the quizzes because i just didn’t get it. part of my self-discovery was recognizing that i needed help in understanding different topics from that class and from then on i sought out help. now i’m understanding topics better and feel comfortable asking certain things to be reexplained to me in order to get a grip on a topic. i encourage others to seek help if they too find themselves struggling in a class or just need someone to talk to. i believe that i grow by surrounding myself with people who build me up. in week four of moreau we came to the conclusion that “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). with the friendships i have built in these last eight weeks, i feel as though this quote could not be more accurate. everyday when i’m eating lunch or dinner with my friends, our table is filled with constant laughter and happiness. i recognize that when i myself am around people who make me feel good, i too smile unconsciously and am in an overall happier mood. i will use these positive experiences to be a positive person for someone else to assist in their journey of growing to be a better person as well. i believe i am responsible for my thoughts and actions and they pertain to others. in week five of moreau we discussed how “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). if i’m around other people i should be aware of how what i may say or do may affect them. my roommate is an international student and unfortunately due to travel restrictions her parents were unable to move her in and she won’t get to see her family for the first time again until christmas break. oftentimes we love sharing stories about our families, and this semester my parents came to visit for one of the games. i guess you could say we “adopted” my roommate for the weekend and my parents happily took care of her and i know her parents are unable to be here. yet as happy as she was during that time i couldn’t help but wonder if my parents being there made her wish her parents could also come. i recognize that she misses them a lot and am always down to listen and tell more stories about our families. i hope to use this experience and others similar to it to be able to think about how what i may say or do will affect those around me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=6s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=6s https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 i believe that i pursue the truth by being honest. during week six of moreau we wrote poems about where we are from. it was a chance to truly tell our stores of who we are in a creative sense more or less. a few lines from my poem included “i am from jumping in puddles to standing in the rain...feeling the crisp drops of water as they cascade down my face...i am from sun rises to the sun shining in my eyes” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). now although i was being a bit literal about where i’m actually from, these lines are indicative of who i honestly am. i enjoy being outside and absorbing all nature has to offer. just the other day it was raining when i was walking to class, so i just took a moment and let the rain pour down on me, and i loved it. when we are honest about who we are and what we want, we are working towards finding our true selves. i will take these moments of self-discovery as foundations for my personality and self. i believe that i am made to discover my true self and help others discover theirs. during this past seventh week of moreau we saw that “power is the ability not just to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person.” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i think what this means is that power allows one to make experiences and other occurrences be the story of a person, let it be their identity. with this power we are meant to find our true selves and let others see us in this way. at the same time we must use our power to help others find their true selves and lead them down a path of self-discovery. using things such as the power of our voice or the power to stand up to one another will help us in this journey. in these eight weeks of college, i feel as though i have developed a set of beliefs that will guide me the next four years in my journey at notre dame. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story keely mcglone father kevin moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 the lens of belief “what do i believe?” is arguably the most important question we can ask ourselves in an intellectual society. the question challenges us to reach beyond our surface-level selves and makes us truly consider why we are who we are and how we have gotten there. the beauty of beliefs is that no two peoples can be the same because everyone possesses unshared experiences. our beliefs are formed based off these experiences that are unparalleled and create much of the intangible diversity in our society. here are several of my core beliefs about myself, my community, and those around me that have been formed by my life thus far, and consequently, here is me: i believe that i am responsible for identifying aspects of my past that have made me afraid to be myself. vulnerability is key to authenticity, but not everyone has the background and capacity to accept vulnerability, my dad and i being two examples. i never connected the idea that vulnerability is needed to be authentic until discussing “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown and her idea that those who are wholehearted must first be authentic and vulnerable. the relationship i have with my dad has provided me this realization and has made vulnerability hard to accept. my dad is an intricate and marvelous person who i am very close with, yet i don’t think i know his authentic self because of his lack of vulnerability. i feel as though the only people who might know him are my mom and his dad, and i desire to know him that deeply one day. i don’t think he has the capacity for that vulnerability in some relationships because of his mother’s passing at a young age that led him to be self-reliant. until this is addressed, he won’t have the capacity accept vulnerability. more alarmingly, his lack of display of vulnerability has shielded me from publicizing that emotion and normalized my hatred towards vulnerability. it needs to be publicized to be authentic, yet it is hard mountain to climb and is one i need to take responsibility of. i believe that i am working on ridding myself of the expectations our society places on prioritizing work over well-being. david brooks in “should you live for your resumé or your eulogy?” communicates the need to balance adam i and adam ii in our lives—the side of external success versus the side of internal relationships and values. to this, i am reminded of my mom, inarguably the best human i will ever meet in my lifetime. my mom is one of the hardest worker’s i know and it’s inspiring, but her desire and expectation more so to work tirelessly has always come at the expense of her emotional and physical well-being. i wish she recognized the beauty that lies in herself and the amazing life she has provided my family rather than the temporary beauty that lies in her corporate work. no one can blame her for the height of the standards her job is held at because it is the structure of the society we live in and it’s too daunting for her to solely defy it. when i look back on my time in high school, sometimes i regret the time i spent focusing on resumé builders and wish i had done more to fulfill the soul of my community. i don’t want to experience this regret when i look back at my time as a notre dame student. i believe that i misunderstood religion for far too long and ignored its potential. father pete in “the role of faith in our story” reminds us: “jesus focused on reminding us of the life we are called to… a life that requires courage, a willingness to shed the comforts of this world and above all else, to love those who are most in need. let us never forget that we live in a world that is hungry, thirsty, without shelter, ill, and imprisoned.” i would never claim that i’m the most religious person, maybe that’s because i am afraid of vulnerability in accordance with religion or maybe that’s because i have never felt a space where it was normal and welcomed to discuss. in my childhood, i was a member of organized religion, but my participation was shamefully low. i saw religion as an obligation and as a set of restrictions that determined self-worth and value, and that’s a universal misconception. religion in any form is a vessel for kindness, love, and service at its core, and truly makes a camaraderie of a community. i believe that i pursue truth by fighting for things that others walk easily away from. “healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign lays out signs that a relationship is unhealthy and that it is time to let go. among these is someone who bails frequently, doesn’t listen, and talks behind backs. what this article fails to acknowledge is the situation created when a previously healthy relationship becomes unhealthy due to outside factors. any relationship that is not life-giving is emotionally detrimental, but i believe sometimes these relationships are worth fighting for. when my best friend went through months of deep depression, she often cancelled plans and didn’t have the mental to capacity to support me. she has impacted my life in a monumental way, but in her times of struggle i often observed a onesided relationship that outsiders would denote unhealthy. emotionally, this was a scarring experience; i felt unsupported and unfulfilled without her advice and friendship, but the decision to fight for this relationship and prioritize her when she needed it most was one of the best decisions i could’ve made. i would not be who i am without her. when there was an absence of a life-giving relationship on my part and needed her to return the favor, she was there. where other people would’ve given up because of the nature of the relationship, i fought in knowledge that there was a reward. i believe that i am still searching for the worthiness of sacrifice. sacrifice is necessary for personal development, but the caveat is the worthiness of that sacrifice cannot be measured in present times. every sacrifice i have ever made has been made in great doubt and fear. in general, college is a hard transition. being away from home, family, the familiar, etc. is something that dissipates the idea of childhood and is difficult to accept. i find myself asking how much worth lies in being twelve hours away from my family at a school that is academically demanding in ways i have never experienced before. the worthiness of this are my best educated guesses, just like father sorin did when he founded notre dame. father sorin had no way of envisioning the beauty and power of present-day notre dame, and i have no way of envisioning the beauty and power of my future because of my time here. stories like his ground me on my search and remind me that it is okay to doubt sacrifice if there is some sapling of hope. i believe that i am afraid to admit where i truly come from, but that it’s not a story i need to explain meticulously because it is mine. this ties in with my hesitations to be vulnerable. i write that i’m from row boats and muddy dogs, from fallen pine branches and spiced pecans. i hesitated to take this poem deeper because i am afraid to verbalize the true aspects of my past that have truly made me the way i am. i followed george ella lyon’s “where i’m from” format exactly because i was afraid of venturing into what would happen if i did it authentically. while she wrote about being from fudge and eyeglasses, i wrote about ice cream in a bag and a singing christmas tree. the beauty of it, though, is that i know all these random things tie to the real story of where i’m from, one that can be shared in any way and at any time i see fit. lastly, i believe that our community needs to promote inclusivity and discomfort to provide an opportunity to dismantle social misjustice. “how to think about ‘implicit biases’” by the scientific american sheds light onto the inevitable presence of implicit biases in our lives and how they’re not necessarily bad but have the potential to worsen into more severe issues. it is nearly impossible to eliminate implicit biases from our society, but it is possible to rationalize them, improve them, and create an environment that is welcoming to any person of any origin or identification. if people remain comfortable with certain implicit biases we “naturally” have, the only way to convince them is to provide them with evidence. this evidence can only be provided if a person is willing to be uncomfortable and test their norms. we as a community need to prioritize practices like these in all levels and types of organizations to make a difference. i believe this mostly because of my best friend who has struggled immensely with being accepted in society because of her race, but i also believe this because no one should have to feel marginalized by society. we can’t blame ourselves for the society we were born into, but we can do everything in our power to make it better for those who follow. moreau integration a shift from one life to another was simply a new beginning to a new journey. the semester in notre dame is almost done. everyone has encountered and lived a different experience in it. the differences in our feelings and experiences make the story of this semester unique. there were questions on the mind, growth in some aspects, challenges, and wins that i, myself, experienced this semester . some of the most important questions that i have asked myself was to what extent can we measure someone’s religious beliefs? since i am in a catholic school that is built on important beliefs and carries within it so many students with different religions but similar beliefs. i have noticed how everyone here has their own way of praying or connecting with god. my faith and religion has increased in importance here. i am a muslim and i chose this catholic school because of its beliefs and faith. i have encountered some students with the same religion as me, and i grew in respecting my religion when i saw the prayer room for us on campus. this showed me this college accepts everyone and gives hope for everyone through faith. this idea of hope is seen in (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8, (c.s. lewis) -moreau fye week 12). i could see it specifically in this quote “their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change,” where it shows how we are in constant change and how we grow in what we believe in. our religion is what brings hope and what prevents demons from controlling our thoughts continuously as suggested in the letter. i think there is no definite extent to our religious beliefs, and that is what makes us unique in growing. lastly, this is what makes us unique. some of the issues that were once ambiguous but now hold a greater clarity is diversity. this goes back to (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes -moreau fye week 11). everyone hates injustice and always fights for unfairness, but in the end they don’t realize that they live in a racist community that keeps on growing. this happens unconsciously for others and consciously for the rest. diversity matters in a way we don’t think about and how it affects a lot of what happens on a daily basis. this quote from that week “we don't accept inequality as a good thing but it is present” expresses our reality. an incident happened, where someone in the dining hall was being racist to an asian girl. everyone was disgusted by that person’s action, which shows how a lot of us do not agree with injustice and racism but it is still there somehow. a lot of the upperclassmen have told us how this year is the most diverse in notre dame, and i came to a realization how diversity is what makes campus more unique. i have seen this in the positive interaction and relationships that everyone has built this semester. finally, there is always a good party for everything. back at home dealing with hardships was “black and white” to me, but this semester it was moreambigious and complicated. for my first few weeks in notre dame, i felt homesick and in need of my close friends and family. also, there was a lot of work and time management that had to be done and i had some hardships in those first weeks. in (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” (grotto) -moreau fye week 10) it showed an interesting way of healing through japanese art. i liked how the woman that leads it made everyone think about what broke them, and let out everything that sits heavy on their heart. i believe that every person will encounter something in their life that would let them feel lost and would teach them life lessons. i think that this is how life works. nothing is perfect, and everyone is on their own journey of self-love and self-discovering. maybe the first few weeks of college were challenging and complicated. we are not used to this, because we lived 188 years of our lives with our family and close to our friends. trying something new for the first time is also hard, but as time progresses, it becomes easier. for me, it was only the first few weeks when i started to adapt to this new culture and new life here. in the end, i won in this case. one of the things that i grew to understand here was imposter syndrome. i realized how imposter syndrome has no threshold, and everyone is susceptible to some sort of self doubt and a feeling of fraudulence. also, one really knows what others are actually feeling, in a way of thinking that they are the only ones experiencing this. i have felt the idea of this quote “intense feelings of imposterism can prevent people from sharing their great ideas” in my seminar this semester. this is from (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox, ted-ed -moreau fye week 9). in my seminar, we do discussions on latin american poetry, which is a new angle for me. during the first few weeks of college, i was a little nervous to give my opinions and interpretations in class. this did not stay for a while because i realized that everyone feels the same way somehow and there is no right or wrong in interpretations. i started giving my opinions and thoughts, and i realized how imposter syndrome could prevent us from expressing some powerful thoughts within our minds. finally, i grew to understand that during my months here. in conclusion, we are all unique in the way we narrate our stories in life. the questions we asked, the challenges we faced, the wins we scored, and the growth we achieved while encountering the first semester in notre dame is different for every one of us. i grew in understanding myself more and respecting my religion. i have faced challenges away from home but won in accepting and transitioning. more awaits in the journey, and i can not wait for what is there. captsone integration moreau fye capstone integration the path to the best version of myself i am dedicated to always being open – open to learn, open to grow, open to adapt, open to pursue, open to follow, open to lead, open to accomplish. upon the course of a lifetime, i wish to appreciate the world around me and use it for its resources. i believe that people are pushed to their fullest potential when they want to learn and they do everything in their ability to learn, in whatever way they can. whether that means seeking advice from older members of society, listening and truly trying to understand thoughts of peers, or exploring the endless resources like the news and the internet, being open to and seeking knowledge will help continue to develop me as a knowledgeable and worldly person. i hope to push myself to be open to adventure – to seeing possibilities out in the world and not shying away from them. i believe that growth comes from experience – most often ones that push people out of their realm of comfort. in this way i hope to meet each new experience with an excited and grateful sense of being. i am also dedicated to always being determined. whether it is the small task of making a family dinner, or the large task of fulfilling my dreams of becoming a doctor, i hope to carry out every action in life with determination. having a sense of purpose through determination will keep my life moving in a forward direction and make meaning come from things accomplished in everydaylife. through this all, i am also determined to stay connected to my faith. it is easy for life to get in the way – to feel like there is no time to stop – but i hope to remember the reason that i am where i am, and appreciate all that i have been given and will continue to pursue with the power of god (mission statement – moreau fye week 13). what attributes to being open? while being open can span across many different things, there are two specific categories i hope to keep in mind. the first is being open to others. as i have learned throughout my college experience, the way to gain the most knowledge and to have the most fun is through knowing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1v-ifvghj0ijb_yclynfh6cmjes2s3gi3wpyw8trvps0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1v-ifvghj0ijb_yclynfh6cmjes2s3gi3wpyw8trvps0/edit others. whether that means learning about a classmate's experiences to gain perspective or reaching out to someone that becomes your closest friend, actively getting to know others is important in growing as a person. in addition, being open to others fosters a welcoming community – something that is mutually beneficial to you and others. as mentioned in a ted conference by pope francis, “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). as so commonly focused on at notre dame, community is important. within a community people can feel themselves and be lifted by the constant support around them. within this community, everyone needs to be accepted, as the purest form of community involves every type of person. while there are many issues in the world today highlighting the unacceptance of certain groups of people, the first step to breaking that injustice is with personal change. as stated by dean marcus cole, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it… each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean marcus cole – moreau fye week 12). systemic injustice is not something that has an easy fix, but being actively aware of the small changes one individually can make is a good start. pope francis explains how, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). the community here at notre dame is what we make of it, and i hope to do what i can to help foster a welcoming, inclusive, and supportive community, whether that be through actively having conversations with others or engaging with different clubs and activities on campus. being open to others also includes actively seeking conversation with others who hold opposing views. instead of being trapped into one way of thinking, talking to people with opposing views is important in gaining insight into the other side of issues and challenging your own viewpoints – helping build strong foundational beliefs. dr. paul blaschko mentions that, “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145635 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145732 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145732 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145635 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145635 with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree, which is accelerating political polarization.” (“how to avoid echo chambers” by paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). being open to others goes beyond being a smiling face in a crowd; it means truly trying to understand others in an attempt to broaden your perspective and challenge your viewpoints. in the same sense of trying to truly get to know others, a sense of accompaniment can be found. as told by steve reifenburg, “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenburg – moreau fye week 9). through being open to others, a support system can be built that fosters accompaniment – a community attribute that helps people flourish. when i began at notre dame, i found a group of close friends within my dorm. it is a group of friends that i truly love still today, but it worked out that they are all students in the business school while i am a stem major. with this, i struggled the first semester finding friends within my classes and friends that i could study with. while i made some friends during first semester, the lack of true connection led me to believe that i would just continue throughout my four years working independently. however, i came into second semester with an open mind, met others and truly attempted to get to know them, and now am overjoyed with the people i have found and friends i have made in my major. i hope to continue with this mentality into the rest of my classes to continue to build a support system. in addition to being open to others, i hope to stay open to challenges and the process it takes to get through them. college is a new experience – challenges are inevitable – but when approached with the right mindset, they can be vital learning experiences. as mentioned by aria swarr when people are brought down by challenges or adversity, “they often focus on the things [they] do not have.” (“5 minutes” by aria swar – moreau fye week 6). while it is hard to do initially, it is important to remember all the good that is happening in the world. instead of focusing on what went wrong or what you could have done differently, it is important to focus on things you can control – the way you move forward. in addition, as told by the meruelo family center for career development, it is crucial to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145716 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145669 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145669 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145602 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145602 remember that “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4) . having an open mind about recovery and being ready to face setbacks along the way will help challenges be overcome. at the beginning of this semester, i was immediately hit and overwhelmed by my course load. after having the first test for all of my classes in the first week, i did not perform as well on them as i would have hoped. while i was very disappointed and thinking about all of the ways i could have studied more, i then realized that all i could control was working to improve my work throughout the remainder of the semester. being able to put those first exams behind me has helped me move on with an open mind thinking about the success i knew i would be able to achieve in the future. as i figured out how to navigate my classes, i performed much better and grew as a student throughout the process – something that will be beneficial throughout the rest of my academic career. while it is important to approach challenges with an open mind, it is also important to know yourself and not push yourself too hard. as mentioned by pico iyer “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). being able to find balance in your life instead of always trying to do a million things at once is extremely important in reaching success. at the beginning of my first semester at notre dame, i felt the need to get involved in as many things as possible: clubs, sports, leadership, etc. however, after trying to carry all of these things on, i never had a chance to pause and realized that i did not have enough time to focus on my coursework, arguably the most important part of my experience here. in letting go of a few of these activities, i was able to create a more balanced schedule that allowed time for myself and allowed me to do well in my classes. i hope to always be open to challenge but also aware of my personal limits in order to lead a healthy life well lived. in addition to being open, i aspire to be determined and passionate. having a drive in life is something of great importance to me and something that i think is a large contributor to a life well lived. with this, i https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145485 hope to constantly look for activities that excite me and to surround myself with people that keep me determined. when talking to my mom about when she believed i was filled with the most joy, she explained that all instances were when i was around people who i loved and who uplifted me, and when i was doing something i am passionate about (moreau fye week 5). passion comes with joy. whether that means getting involved with research that i find inspiring, joining a club sport to have a fun outlet, or choosing classes that i would look forward to attending, finding passion means finding joy and means staying driven. this drive can lead you to great success. as told by the notre dame alumni association in the “domer dozen”, “resourcefulness, relentless drive, and service have guided kiersten dehaven ’14 throughout her young career” (“the domer dozen” by the notre dame alumni association – moreau fye week 2). notre dame is filled with resources to help you achieve – being determined and actively seeking them will bring great success. when talking about making life decisions, fr. michael himes stated that one should “look for the task that will continue to stretch [them]” (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3). i hope to continue throughout my education at notre dame challenging myself within the realms of my passions. doing so will continue to fill me with joy while developing me as a person. through this all, throughout my journey in life, i hope to stay connected to god. i came to notre dame excited about the opportunity to pursue my faith individually. in staying connected to god is it important to have faith. as stated by jacob walsh “ you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week 10) through exploring my faith in different ways – attending mass, joining a club, or just talking with my friends – i hope to become more engaged with god. by vesting my effort i will continue to see his love returned –one that will guide me throughout my life experiences. https://docs.google.com/document/d/18jkvbluzwlaruak13un8kjfka7z8sbxetp15v2dv-4q/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145509 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145691 integration one prof. espeseth moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 ð���ð���ð���ð��� 1 ð���ð���ð���ð��� 8 â�« ð���ð���ð��¶ð���ð��¡ look! my integration paper is done! just kidding, donâ��t worry. ever since i was young, math has always been my favorite subject. i have always found it comforting to know that there is always a concrete solution to what i am working towards, no matter how lost or confused i get. as one might logically conclude, i have tried many times to carry this over to my life: i get an idea in my head of where i need to go and how i need to get there, and try to hold onto that. sometimes, this is really not a wonderful mindset, especially when uncertainty and unforeseen circumstances arisei found myself very conflicted with this in high school especially. the one thing that has managed to stay constant, though, that i have always been able to fall back on, is my belief that i want to help people, and that i am meant to do so. i believe that god has a plan for me, and although i donâ��t know it, i must trust in him. in week 3, we discussed this idea of believing it will all work out in the end. i think tim phrased it very nicely, saying, â��much more often, though, itâ��s been that slow build-things didnâ��t go how i wanted, but i was able to see how god was still good to me through the ordealâ�� (â��student reflections on faithâ�� moreau fye week three). i thought this quote was very truthful in describing how a lot of us, especially as students, see thingsthat it doesnâ��t always go as planned a lot, but itâ��s about learning to find god and the good things even in those bad times. growing up, i always looked up to my grandma and her faith. whenever something didnâ��t go as expected, https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view she would say â��offer it up.â�� my senior year of high school my grandma passed away unexpectedly, and i found myself having a very difficult time. although it took a while to come to terms with her loss, just like tim, i know that my grandma is much happier now with god, my grandpa, and the rest of my relatives once again, and i know that not just god is watching over me, but she is too now. even in the uncertainty of coming to a completely new place with new people, the strong faith i am surrounded with daily at notre dame, from friends to dorm masses, does not let me forget these things. i believe that i am worthy of healthy relationships. my desire to help people and care for them, especially when i am not sure of anything else, led to me having to realize that my feelings are just as valid and important as anyone else. growing up, i was always the friend that was always there, loving my friends no matter what, doing anything for them. especially as i entered high school, i found myself in relationships and friendships where my kindness was unknowingly being taken advantage of. these relationships were ultimately one-sided, and led me to developing a mindset that my feelings just were less important than othersâ��. when these friendships fell apart, i saw myself as unequivocally guilty. after numerous visits to my school counselor, i was finally able to overcome this perspective. the one piece of advice that she told me that i remind myself constantly is that â��friendships are a two way street.â�� i was reminded of this advice and my many discussions with my counselor during the very first week of this semester, with the words, â��they had the compassion to be kind to themselves first and then to others, because, as it turns out, we can't practice compassion with other people if we can't treat ourselves kindlyâ�� (â��the power of vulnerabilityâ�� by brenã© brown moreau fye week one) this quote puts into words something that many of us forget time and time again: that you canâ��t take care of others if you are not taking care of yourself and believing in yourself. i feel selfish if https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 i choose not to do something for someone else because i need to do something for myself. i remind myself that iâ��m just as worthy of that compassion, that i am no less deserving than anyone else, that friendships, and any other relationships, are a two way street. since i have gotten to college, i have started forming some very strong and healthy friendships. when reflecting on these past two months, i have realized that the friendships i have formed are actually the healthiest and equal sided i have ever had. coming to notre dame, i was very nervous, as i am very introverted and have not had wonderful past experiences with making friends; i was afraid of getting hurt. i was pleasantly surprised, however, at the kindness of everyone on campus. i believe that genuine friendships are grounded in a mutual respect, interest, and trust of one another, and i have found this to be particularly true in two friendships i have made so far. â��attention is one of the rarest forms of loveâ�� (â��5 signs youâ��re in a toxic friendshipâ�� by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). ever since hearing this quote, i have realized just how valuable listening is in friendships. with these two friends, i feel genuinely heard when i talk to them, and i am genuinely listening to what they have to say as well. the art of listening, i think, is one of the truest signs of friendship. it shows a sense of respect, interest, and builds trust. i have had some of the most genuine interactions and conversations with others these past two months, and it has truly made me appreciate and realize what friendship is. i believe that everyoneâ��s voice deserves to be heard. everyone has a unique perspective of the world, and everyoneâ��s perspective holds a place in the world. although there are right and wrong values, everyoneâ��s feelings are just as valid and important as each othersâ��. open conversations and giving attention even to the ideas that we do not necessarily agree with, but taking the time to hear what their viewpoint is and why one thinks the way they do is crucial to form a â��shared story,â�� as chimamanda ngozi adiche explained, rather than one that people are https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ divided. i think the community at notre dame works very hard to achieve this goal. i have really enjoyed our hall council meetings every week in my dorm, because there is always the chance for anyone to add any thoughts or concerns at the end, and people actually do. i have found this very admirable, and i find comfort knowing that i live in a community where my voice is not only able to be heard, but wants to be (â��the danger of a single storyâ�� by chimamanda ngozi adiche moreau fye week seven). this welcoming environment and kindness that i have encountered has helped me overcome a lot of fear. i have always been afraid of the uncertain. that is why i have always fallen back to math and logic. life is not a math equation, however much i wish it was, but there are certain factors that must be taken into account. arriving at notre dame, i do not think i have been more scared of anything. living in south bend my whole life, i have always known notre dame and i had been on campus a thousand times, yet it still terrified me, because i did not know what notre dame would be to me. but i could not let this fear paralyze me, as â��fear has no place in [my] success equationâ�� (â��notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist addressâ�� by carla harris moreau fye week five). my fear would only hold me back from achieving the things i am meant to. how am i supposed to help people, if i am too afraid to make a mistake? i believe that failure, not fear, does hold a place in my success equation. without knowing my faults and making mistakes, i will never be able to improve myself, get better, or succeed in providing the help and care i so long to give to the people around me and the world. we do not get better by never acknowledging our weaknesses. this is a flaw in our mindsets: we only focus on building our strengths because we think, â��oh, thatâ��s what weâ��re good at, so letâ��s just keep doing that,â�� and when we have trouble with something we say, â��oh, well weâ��re not good at that so letâ��s just accept it how it is.â�� (â��should you live for your rã©sumã© ... https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim or your eulogy?â�� by david brooks moreau fye week two). some of my biggest weaknesses are bravery and courage. these are two things that i have especially tried focusing on improving upon since arriving at college, trying to put myself out there and stand up for myself and the things i believe in. i believe that our biggest moments of growth do not come from our strengths, but from facing our weaknesses. i have always liked knowing what is coming, exactly how things work, where things come from. i like knowing the deeper meaning and origins of things, and building new things. growing up the daughter of an architect, i have always had a big imagination. my dream has always been to invent something that helps people (poem moreau fye week six). but, as i have come to learn, especially these past two months, in order to do that, i need to recognize my core beliefs, because those are how i will grow and learn how i actually can help people. by forming strong friendships built on trust, trusting in god and accepting that i do not know what is coming, embracing failures, and facing my weaknesses, i can continue to forge my path in the world, and grow as an individual contributing to the greater good. these are the components of the math equation that i am capable of pursuing. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/196e4d2pf-aycr3ff8wncaklvyh-5s9tf0gfqzejib7w/edit moreau integration assignment continued growth ● i believe the purpose of life is the pursuit of my “best self.” no one is born into the world with a clear purpose, so we all must search for something to justify our continued existence. we all have different abilities and passions, so it’s useless to attempt to derive purpose from comparing ourselves to others or trying to be “the best” at something; there will always be someone better. i have learned through many activities, most importantly being a competitive swimmer, that focusing on self improvement is the most fulfilling mindset to have. at notre dame, i continue to try to become my best self through the pursuit of a well rounded higher education. although some students only find value in the courses required for their major, i believe that having to take classes in a variety of academic disciplines will make me a more complete person by making me more knowledgeable about the world that i live in. ● i believe that communities should be built on loyalty and trust. all communities rely on trust in order to function. the strongest communities are those where the members of the community can rely on each other for help and support. as i have learned from my family and friends, it is much easier to get support from the people that i can trust, and in order to gain trust, you have to open up to other people and expose your vulnerabilities. as brene brown identified in her ted talk, those who embrace their vulnerability are the ones who feel the most worthy within a community. “they (the wholehearted) fully embraced vulnerability. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one)” we must therefore trust each other so we all feel comfortable being vulnerable to others in our community. the history of the founding of notre dame provides good insight into an example of a community built on trust. while father sorin was building the university, he realized that he was not a good enough leader to finish the project. “but the more i feel penetrated with gratitude for so many blessings from heaven upon our work, the more i realize my own incapacity to long direct the undertaking. in good time you gave me the direction of some five or six brothers in america, but you will understand that now all is changed. the present situation demands the presence of an able leader, one possessing, as much as possible, the qualifications prescribed ·by our constitutions. it is for you, reverend father, to make the choice which will meet all the requirements of such a mission.” (letter to basil moreau by fr. sorin moreau fye week 5) father sorin trusted father moreau with his insecurities, and this allowed him to reach out to father moreau. if sorin didn’t have this trusting network to rely on, notre dame might not have been as successful as it is today. i try to apply this belief by focusing on trying to build trust with the people i live by or work closely with. i try to build as much trust with them as possible by being honest, keeping promises, being accepting of their thoughts, and not being afraid to be vulnerable around them. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view ● i believe that mutual respect is the foundation for every good relationship. all people deserve to be respected, and the only way you can truly understand and be in a relationship with someone is if you start from a place of respecting them. respect is almost universally desired, and most people agree that everyone deserves to be respected, as seen by the emphasis our class put on respecting each other and their ideas when building the class norms. during the fourth week, we read an article identifying five signs of a toxic friendship: “they only talk about negative things, they don’t really listen to you, they repeatedly bail on you, they talk about other people behind their backs, they use you to get what they want” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) when analyzing these behaviors and traits, the conclusion i have drawn is that most of them stem from a lack of respect by one or both parties. when respect for the other person is lost, you can almost justify treating them however you like, which can be a very awful thing. i try to let this value influence all actions in my life because the biggest part of being a good person and friend is respecting others. with my friends, i try to always remind myself to respect them, their feelings, and their thoughts so that i can be a good friend and not lose my relationship with them. even if i don’t get along with someone or they make mistakes, they still deserve to be respected. ● i believe that a person’s value comes from the impact they’ve had on others. the search for self worth is something many people struggle with in the modern day, including myself. it took me quite a while to become comfortable with who i am, and even today i’m still trying to find where my worth lies. through much reflection, i have found that the best answer to the worth of human life is a person’s impact on those around them, especially their friends and family. that is not to say that human life should be judged comparatively based on this scale, for every human life has the same value. rather it should be used as a way for those looking for value in their life to find it. many people try to find meaning in their life by the things that they did, especially in the professional sense. although it is not wrong to focus on external achievement, it is also important to remember that you will be remembered by the person you were to others. as ted brooks identified in his ted talk, “...the eulogy virtues are more important of the virtues.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two) the only thing that will remain of a person after their death is their memory, and people are remembered by their impact on others. that is why you should derive your value from how you impact other people. even with this belief in mind, it can still be hard to find self worth. even when i knew that i was important to my friends and family, i sometimes struggled with accepting the fact that i am just as valuable as everyone else. it was only when i stopped comparing myself to others and only focused on how i impacted or was important to the people in my life that i finally understood where my value came from. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim this core belief has begun to guide my life for the past couple of years. after realizing that my worth is tied to how i treat others, i have done everything i can to try to be the best person i can be to my friends and family. i also try to use this knowledge to help those who struggle with finding their own self worth. i try to remind them of the important things they have done for me and explain that they have value because of the things they have done for me and for others. ● i believe that i have a duty to protect and support those i care about. protecting the people you care about is a very important responsibility that everyone has. those who have the power to protect others should use that power responsibly by intervening to keep those they care about safe. this can be from a variety of threats, both internally and externally. i try to live this by always looking out for those i care about. this has been especially important in college now that my peers and i are away from the safety of our parents. i’m sure to never leave one of my friends behind and to always have their back in a risky situation. integration 2 11/30/21 embracing the unexpected throughout the semester i have struggled, i have faced adversity, i have been in countless uncomfortable situations, but most importantly i have learned and i have grown. moving across the country, over 750 miles away from my home, my friends, and my family, i was scared. my first few weeks i was struggling searching for a sense of belonging in this foreign place. those weeks were riddled with homesickness, stress, and awkwardness, but after persisting through them i got to truly experience the amazing community of notre dame. initially, not knowing anyone at this school or in my dorm made me feel out of place and alone. i tried my best to acclimate but i was constantly putting added pressure on myself to make friends. the one thing that really helped me was my dorm and the strong sense of community we have within sorin college. being in one of the smaller dorms on campus, i know everyone who is in sorin. i am not close friends with everyone, and there are some guys who i don’t think i have ever spoken to, but that doesn’t change the fact that they are just as much a part of sorin as the next. this is why the article thirteen ways of looking at community really stood out to me(“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer morreau fye week eleven). in the article there was one specific definition of community that talked about how everyone around us is part of our community, even those we don’t interact with. looking back on the start of the school year, the idea that i was part of a community, even if i didn’t speak to many people or know anyone was so helpful at making me feel like i belonged. writing this now it’s hard for me to imagine a time where i felt like i didn’t fit in at notre dame or where i felt like i was alone. i have made lasting friendships with so many people during this semester. my dorm has also shown to be such a close knit community where we 11/30/21 really do everything together. my response to my feelings at the beginning of the semester was to try to socialize more and that's a decision i am so thankful i made. on top of a search for belonging, college is very different from high school, and i felt tossed into the fire. classes were harder, and i felt every person around me was smarter. what i was experiencing was the textbook case of imposter syndrome as described by elizabeth cox in her tedtalk, “what is imposter syndrome?” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox morreau fye week nine). hearing others talk about how easy a class that i was struggling in was to them, or hearing them talk about exam grades just made me feel like i wasn’t cut out for notre dame. while this feeling diminished since the start of the semester i have also tried to use it as motivation to succeed. now instead of feeling like i don’t belong i feel like i am working to show that i belong. this has really helped me progress from a stagnant mindset into a growth mindset. one of the other ways i really grew this semester was with my catholic faith. attending a catholic university like notre dame has opened up so many opportunities for me to practice my faith every day. being able to attend a school where i am not just receiving an education, but i am also able to enjoy a sense of community focused around my religion has been more meaningful to me than i ever could have imagined. a specific quote from the holy cross and christian education publication that stood out to me was “the charism of education in the faith that the holy spirit entrusted to the congregation of holy cross through blessed basil moreau combines a form of pedagogy that mirrors a person’s natural human development and moral formation with the call to christian discipleship.” (the holy cross and christian education by notre dame’s campus ministry morreau fye week twelve) this quote shows how notre dame was started because of a calling to be an elite educational institution whose practices and 11/30/21 teachings revolve around the religious pillars it was founded on. after only one short semester, these pillars have had a large impact on my life, and have already left a lasting impact on who i am morally and spiritually. something new that i started since i began attending notre dame was talking to a counselor at the ucs. for me, this was a new experience that i started to help with my anxiety and mental health. as a male i always believed that there was a negative stigma behind men with mental health disorders. it always made me feel like i could not reach out for help. this persisted until recently when i finally felt comfortable enough to seek a counselor. the idea of being broken isn’t one that i personally enjoy because it makes it sound like someone can’t be repaired or put back together. this is why i really enjoyed learning about the art of kintsugi as discussed in the piece by the grotto (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by the grotto morreau fye week ten). the idea of making a pot, smashing it, then using a golden design to put it back together and make a piece of art even more beautiful than before is very poetic to me. it resonates with my belief that nobody is broken, instead someone might just need their gold trim to make them even more beautiful than before. this is the mindset i had when i began attending my sessions at the ucs and because of it, i slowly think i can see my own gold trim. starting college has been a very overwhelming experience at times. being thrown into so many new situations was startling and very scary, but throughout my journey i have learned and grown. looking back at where i was the day of our first morreau class meeting, not knowing anyone and awkwardly wearing our dorm’s color coordinated shirts, i never would have expected to become so close with everyone in that room. this first semester has taught me many things like to take risks, travel outside of your comfort zone, and be more outgoing. yet, the one 11/30/21 thing my first semester at notre dame has taught me is to embrace the unexpected with open arms. sometimes the best things in life are the ones we never saw coming. kazimour1 professor retartha moreau 3 december 2021 encountering and responding to college life we encounter challenges on the daily, as well as, positive experiences that shape who we are as individuals. we all take challenges in different ways. some fight through it to solve the issue, while others let it go and do not worry about it. these challenges allow us to grow and develop to make us a better person. even with positive experiences we are able to expand on those experiences and hope for even better things to happen. i think the best way to overcome a challenge is to make sure you have people supporting you through it, having no judgement towards others, and hope. with having these three things in mind and hopefully practicing them, it can help the process of your personal development and entry into a new chapter of your life. there was a specific time during my notre dame experience where i needed someone to be there for me. before i entered college, i did not think friends were as important as they are now. in high school, i was able to get through struggles by myself without talking to anyone. as soon as i got to college that changed. that specific example was when i had my first microeconomics midterm and my biology midterm on the same day. i was overwhelmed and stressed. i immediately thought i was unable to do it. my roommate was there for me. she encouraged me and told me that i was going to “kill it!” this relates to what we learned in week 9 of moreau class. in week 9, a specific quote that stood out to me was “you have talent, you are capable, and you belong” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth coxmoreau fye week 9). we all have our own talents that we are capable of doing, yet we doubt them. we have feelings of self-doubt and personal incompetence that happen despite our education and experiences. i think the best way to show our talents is to not care what others think and do the best you can do. i also learned that we need positive people in our lives in order to have confidence in ourselves. without my roommate, i do not think i was going to make it past that day. i am glad that i learned that you need people in your life that encourage you through tough times. in the future, i will try to better myself and support people through their rough days. it is important to be able to rely on others and i want to be one of those people. at notre dame, i sometimes get a feeling that we are all divided. what i mean by that is that we divide ourselves into groups of friends and do not expand our friend groups after they are formed. i have also seen that people with the same race usually stick together. this causes our community to not work as a whole. a personal experience that i encountered was when my friends and we went to a black dance group performance. when we arrived, we were the only white people there. it felt off. it felt like either we did not belong or that they did not want us there. in high school my school was primarily a white group. when i thought about college, i had a black and white picture as to how diversity was such a part of college life. i thought we all do things together and work together. that is not how i felt during this performance. it is almost an internal challenge. in week 10, we talked about the catholic community and racial injustices. i learned that there is hatred everywhere (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devronmoreau fye week 10). hatred is taught not bred. we are taught by family and friends to have hatred towards people whether it be race, religion, or just what they have done in the past. the place that needs to be fixed is the catholic community. catholic churches and schools are the reason why people have hatred towards people of color. the catholic community needs to teach others and recognize all forms of racism. once all hatred is solved, all communities will be able to come together and continue to grow as one whole community. in the future, i plan to continue not to judge anyone, continue to fight to make us one community, and hope that the catholic community will fix all these hatred issues. i have learned with my time so far at notre dame that sharing stories goes a long way. what i mean by this is that i have realized that to become a close friend who is a supporter you must share stories about yourself. these stories can be the challenges you are going through, funny stories, or sad stories. a specific experience i had encountered at school is that i really needed someone to talk to about things happening with school. i was afraid to talk to my parents, i did not want to talk to any adults, and my only option was to talk to a friend. it was the beginning of the year. i did not have anyone to talk to on a personal level. i started hanging up with one of the girls in my dorm, which i can now call my best friend. i opened up and started many many stories about myself. i felt relieved once we got super close and we got comfortable around each other. in week 11, a quote that stood out to me was “every story is a testament of personal truth” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center moreau fye week 11). stories tell you how someone really is and what is happening in their life. when sharing stories and experiencing moments together, it grows the community closer together with all races. race should not be an issue towards anything. stories that are told are just smaller stories that are put into a bigger story. we all need to come together through thick and thin and pretend like we are all one big family and care for each other. in the future, i will do my best to share stories with others and try to learn more about them through their stories. you never know the challenges that people are going through without sharing stories. hope. that is a strong word. before entering college, i watched videos and documentaries in the hope that i would have the same experiences in college. i had the perfect image. now that i have been in college for a semester it is not like that at all. there are tons of ups and downs. there are people that want to hurt you; there are people that want to see you succeed. i am still currently looking for the people that will be there for me through anything. in week 12 a quote that stood out to me was “to decide what the best use of it is, you must ask what use the enemy wants to make of it, and do the opposite” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i think people do not realize what the enemy is trying to do. they believe the enemy is “the good person”. after they realize the good is not in the end, they end up doing the opposite of what they say. in order to grow and live in hope, you must speak the truth to yourself and to others. you must look for the best possible outcomes that can come into your life. i think all people think about is what the worst thing can happen in life rather than thinking of the best outcome and possibility to come. in the future, i have hope that my college experience will get even better than it is now knowing there still will be some downs in my life. the daily experiences we encounter in our life, either good or bad, have an impact on who you become as a person. the thing that matters the most is how you respond. in my opinion and with my personal experiences, you have to be open, be there for each other, and have hope. by having those things in your life, you will succeed. moreau fye integration two encounter and response so far at notre dame i have encountered a lot. i have encountered a lot of people from a lot of backgrounds with a lot of ideas, some of which i agree with and some of which i don't. the content presented in moreau has been representative of some of the ideas that i have encountered, but i believe that the majority of encounters and learning concerning what moreau teaches occur outside of the classroom. however, the class provided some good information and sources, which i will use to reflect on this first semester. coming from an all-male high school, i have never really been surrounded by a community which cares so much about mental health. here at notre dame, however, the student body and administration seem to care a good amount about it, and the content from at least two moreau weeks touched on it. i think that this is a good thing; i don't tend to struggle with mental health problems myself, but i think it is important for those who do to feel supported and have resources. week 9 contained some advice and wisdom for students transitioning into college. in a grotto article, julia hogan discusses the discrepancy between what people feel pressured to do and what actually brings them happiness. at the end, she states, “instead of asking, ‘what should i do?’… ask yourself, ‘what do i want to do?’ and ‘what do i think is best?’ (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i do not believe that what someone wants to do or thinks is best in a specific moment is always actually best. however, i do agree that it is generally good for a person to pursue what he actually wants to do rather than what others around him are pressuring him to do. doing what is both good and pleasurable is a good way to promote good mental health. furthermore, this week’s content touched on imposter syndrome and the fact that transitioning to college can be hard. discussion about imposter syndrome is important to let people know that they are not alone in how they feel and that they actually do belong. also, discussing the fact that the college transition can be hard can help people struggling with this. overall, content from week 9 was encouraging to those struggling with different pressures, and helped me learn about different problems that my peers could be dealing with. week 10 provided information on how we can care for those dealing with mental health issues. overall, i think that the best way to do this is to love. fr. jenkins emphasizes the importance of love in his speech where he states, “love is the greatest commandment… hatred is the great destroyer” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). although there are many different challenges in the world, and in the notre dame community, today, i believe that all of these can be overcome by love. love is the choice that enables us to meet our brothers and sisters where they are at and help support them through their challenges. as mental health issues are a big challenge people deal with today, love can help us help and encourage people through them. based on things i have heard from friends, loving and caring for someone going through this is often the best way to help them. an example of loving people who may be dealing with mental health issues is seen in this unit was the woman who ran the kintsugi workshop. the people who came to her classes were broken for different reasons, but she encouraged each of them with the logic that brokenness does not define anyone, and that it can make us better people if we make the most of it (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto network moreau fye week ten). this information has helped me to better understand how i can help friends struggling with mental health. it seems that often, the best thing to do is to listen to them and encourage them. while i personally don't struggle with mental health issues, many people do, and knowing this can help people get through it. notre dame is a much more diverse community than the one i grew up in, both racially and politically. i am pretty convicted about my beliefs, so i would not say that i have changed my mind about anything here, but i have discovered that i really enjoy hearing other people’s perspectives. i think that growing in relationships with people of different beliefs has expanded my knowledge and understanding of different stances that people hold on things, which i think is a good thing. the content from week 11 emphasizes the importance of hearing different perspectives: an article from the center for courage and renewal proposes, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). i believe that growing in community with people is a necessary component of learning and becoming a better person. obviously, we often learn more from engaging with people different from ourselves, as they have different perspectives and experiences. the people who we consider enemies are often the people most different and most separated from ourselves. accordingly, these people can provide perspectives very different from our own. another video from this unit stressed the point that each person’s story matters in the quest to understand the world around us (“with voices true” by the klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven). both of these pieces support the concept that branching out and talking to people different from oneself is a great way to expand one's horizons and understanding, so i will continue to do this. week 12 dealt with hope. i have found that hope is important, particularly when schoolwork or friendships or life in general is overwhelming. hope has allowed me to strive (to an extent) here at notre dame, since, when i am stressed, i know that i will be fine and that this world does not actually matter that much because there is a much longer one after. in chapter 8 of the screwtape letters, c.s. lewis indirectly promoted the ideas that hope is important to have, especially when it is hard, and that having hope can help us to choose the good. having hope in the hard times helps us to make it through them and enables us to love others through it. while i did not really change my opinion on matters here, i have heard many different opinions of different subjects, and i have been loving that so far. i look forward to continuing to have hope, learn from others, help others, and above all love others through the rest of my college experience. professor thigpen moreau integration 2 3 december 2021 how a dream come true leads to everlasting happiness over the past three months, i have gotten to experience my first taste of what college entails. growing up i had always dreamed of attending notre dame, so every day here has been a dream come true. even though i had always dreamed of attending notre dame, my experiences have varied from what i thought. from an outsider’s perspective, notre dame is viewed as a lively school that revolves around football, catholicism, and a wonderful community. now don’t get me wrong, during my first semester here i have been able to enjoy football saturdays, attend weekly mass, and immerse myself in the greatest community on this earth, but i have also come across numerous obstacles throughout my time here. i envisioned my time here to be a breeze and to be full of fun; however, i have definitely had my fair share of struggles throughout these past three months. my time here at notre dame has been a difficult challenge, but i’ve loved every moment of it. my first semester brought challenges such as creating a new friend group, being away from home for the first time, taking the most challenging courses i’ve ever taken, and finding myself as a person. growing up in a small town, i have grown up with the same group of friends all my life, so coming to college and finding new friends was very new to me. despite it being something different, i quickly found a great, supportive group of friends. the friendships i’ve made so far have been great and i anticipate many of them to last a lifetime. being away from my family has been a huge challenge as well because my family is very close and tight-knit, so it has been hard to be away from them. facetime calls and snapchat selfies have helped me stay close and connected with my family. then coming from a small, rural public school, i have never faced rigorous academics like i have these past three months. the classes i am taking have required extensive studying, hard work, and dedication. they have broken me down but then built me back up. despite all of those challenges, i have been able to start finding myself as a person, which is exactly why i came to notre dame. early on i started to see this question linger over my daily life here at notre dame, “how can i positively respond internally and externally if i fail to meet any expectations i have set out for myself?” throughout my life, i have always set extremely high standards for myself, both inside and outside of the classroom. i knew that at college i would fail to meet some of the goals that i set for myself, so i was curious as to how i would respond to that failure. during a weekly reading in moreau, i came across a quote that has stuck with me ever since, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105261). to my surprise, i did not feel that negative feeling when i failed, instead, i used it as a moment of learning. the supportive community that surrounds me would pick me up whenever i felt like a failure, so now i know that regardless of what happens, i have people behind me who are proud of what i’ve accomplished. as i began to see myself fail to reach some of my goals, difficult challenges started to become roadblocks towards my success. i fell into the trap of comparing myself to other students and constantly worrying about what my gpa will be. i continued to find myself guilty of not being good enough to be here, or that i don’t belong at an elite university. during one week of moreau, there was a quote that really stuck with me. it states, “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia -the prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse. without conviction, there would be no hope” (“the national cathedral” by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105274) after reading this quote by our university president, i realized that i was doing exactly what i should be, which is holding myself accountable through challenges. notre dame had brought different challenges upon me, but by holding myself accountable i was able to achieve success over my 4-years here. as soon as i began to find myself, i was challenged with finding my own community at notre dame. this university is home to the greatest community in the world, but in order to experience the incredible community, i had to find my own. as stated in week eleven of moreau, “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before a community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as “a capacity for connectedness”—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled, forces with names like narcissism, egotism, jealousy, competition, empire-building, nationalism, and related forms of madness in which psychopathology and political pathology become powerfully intertwined” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/modules/items/105304). i quickly realized that in order to find a supportive, caring community, i needed to open my heart to the world the great university that surrounds me. if i became vulnerable enough to open my heart to the world around me, i would be able to form life-long relationships with the amazing people who make up this university. now that i have been able to find myself and my community at notre dame, i needed to realize how my education will help me live a fulfilling life. when choosing a university, i wanted a place that would challenge me as a person, but also as a student. i knew notre dame had excellent academic programs that would allow me to grow as a student every day. not only do they have these programs that will help me grow, but they focus on not only teaching me exactly what the textbook says but how to use that knowledge in daily life. while here at notre dame, i will learn how to create a community, how to love everyone despite their differences, and how to become a force for good in business. as discussed in moreau, education is based on “zeal is the hoped-for product of christian education in the two most influential environments of a young person’s life: home and school. these places are where they spend most of their formative years, learning not just from parents and mentors but also from siblings, other relatives, and peers, about what to think and how to act” (holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau fye week twelve. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314). finding a home inside the classroom and on campus will allow me to make the most out of my learning while here at notre dame. the rigorous academics can be a challenge, but if i am surrounded by the right environment, i am able to achieve all of the goals that i have set for myself in the classroom. attending the university of notre dame is a dream come true since i have always desired of receiving the best education in the world. coming from a really small town, adapting to notre dame was a difficult challenge at first, but after one semester i have found my place here on campus. i have surrounded myself with a great group of people, i have found resources to help me when i struggle, and i have been able to pursue amazing opportunities offered by this outstanding university. notre dame will form me into the person i’ve dreamed of over these next four years, and will forever be in my heart. integration two—donohoe mr. nguyen moreau fye 29 november 2021 “hearts are breakable, and it’s a good thing”: human connection as the foundation for building the future in a few short months, notre dame has transformed my life—introduced me to new people, given me new gifts and experiences. yet what’s truly important, and what makes the future meaningful, is what notre dame can allow me to do for and with others. i met my first fellow notre dame class of 2025 peers a few weeks before my first day on campus. it was at an old kindergarten-8th grade classmate's house—a notre dame club of los angeles event. the familiar setting to begin a new leg of my journey immediately set my mind at ease regarding nd; there were familiar high school peers, friends from years prior, recognizable adults, and then the unknown faces: the adults at the front with nd polos, the students from other areas of la—the ones representing a future of unfamiliar faces who would stay that way if i let opportunity slip me by. i sat down at a table with a mixture of those i knew and did not and struck up conversation. flash forward a few weeks i took the same approach beginning first in siegfried. when presented with a change of scenery, everyone possesses the same motive: familiarity—get to know others, make friends, feel unalone. at the pinnacle of our innate urge to rush into making friends or rush into joining clubs, groups, events, or other activities, imposter syndrome fuels our desire to be desirable—to be enough for someone, some group, something inside ourselves. “to call it a syndrome is to downplay how universal it is. it is not a disease or an abnormality” (“what is imposter syndrome https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=107&v=zquxl4jm1lo&feature=emb_logo and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). i am lucky enough to have arrived at notre dame not facing any severe imposter syndrome. i feel confident in my ability to perform to my own best. i spend most nights reflecting on the feeling of being at home here. yet, feeling confidence in my own ability, my own self-worth, has not always been so easy. i am the youngest of two; i spent kindergarten through senior year in high school following my brother’s path. i always knew he was incredibly bright, but i never really captured the extent of his intelligence until later on in high school. as more and more teachers discussed him, more of my classmates began to know of his accomplishments as well. perfect grades and test scores through college. valedictorian to harvard law school. seemingly every accolade obtainable. my peers made countless jokes at my expense comparing our intelligence. yet, my brother never made me feel less than. i only saw his kindness, his jokes, our playful conversations on anything brothers discuss. always encouraging. always present. notre dame is my ability to be my own person. a new school for my family, despite the irish-sounding last name. a chance for me to meet new people, many of whom will become role models that inform my character like my brother and the other ones before. in turn, i too would get to meet new people and make my impression on a new world: and i have already met so many amazing people. fellow siegfried ramblers who have already contributed to a strong bond. classmates turned friends. acquaintances turned good friends. and unexpected individuals turned best friends. almost everyone i’ve encountered has overall been content with their choice for notre dame. yet following thanksgiving break, i saw one friend post about how this place will never be home. i had always seen occasional frustration here and there, but to see those words on a screen from a friend who so truly felt hurt left a deep impression on me. “hearts are breakable, and it’s a good thing…it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow https://www.youtube.com/watch?time_continue=107&v=zquxl4jm1lo&feature=emb_logo and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). it is easiest to make conversation with those that are happy where they are. but we are not called to do what is easiest, nor called to forget those that truly need a supportive friend. everyone is struggling in some area. no one, no matter how strong they might seem on the outside, truly has everything put together. each person needs words of encouragement. a comforting voice, or simply a good listener, can be what someone needs to get through a tough day, week, or month. i try to be that person. just as notre dame’s academic side showcases the difficulty and struggle faced by so many students, so too does notre dame’s spiritual and emotional side reveal its mission to foster students who genuinely care for the well-being and social-emotional stability of their fellow peers: “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“13 ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven). i find it impossible to prepare directly for encountering brokenness; it is easy and welcoming to encounter hope and community and love, but those areas call us to participate, rise up and lead, and be a beacon to continue that path in the future. unlike the others, encountering brokenness, which like the others will never simply go away in the future, is a past, present, and future state of being we must embrace and overcome. while we cannot prepare for the situation of brokenness, we as notre dame students can prepare for the mindset needed to combat brokenness. having tough conversations with friends, patience to see the hope hidden in the future, being a person who will listen, truly listen, to your problems—these traits notre dame fosters in me and my peers each day from the role models of upperclassman, rectors, and professors to the original message lived by the founders of our college: “[moreau] increasingly saw possibilities beyond the needs and circumstances of his native region” (“holy cross and christian education” by father james b. king csc moreau fye week twelve). https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ the easiest path in life is worthless because it bypasses all the good and bad we must encounter to form as men and women for and with others. notre dame has taught me to seek out the uncomfortable, challenge myself in what i want for my future and what type of person i wish to be, and treat each opportunity as a gift worth cherishing and in turn utilizing to better myself and my community. notre dame is the small conversations in the quesadilla line with the familiar faces from yesterday. notre dame is chatting on the way back from section football, already analyzing each play-by-play. notre dame is silently dying of laughter on the 12th floor of hesburgh library, surrounded by friends, sleep-deprived, procrastinating essays with due dates known weeks in advance yet “forgotten” until the nights before its arrival. notre dame is breaking down in front of the closest friends you meet after only a few months—trusting them with your words and tears as they do with their own. notre dame is human connection—forming bonds that will last a lifetime. integration one bryan reaume moreau first-year experience 15 october 2021 the quest for question frantically trudging through campus, my mind processes an overwhelming amount of thoughts per second; worrying about more major aspects of my life like my calculus midterm on thursday, as well as more minor situations like the realization that my shoe is untied. what i don’t think about, however, is the way the pink sky is projecting a magnificent glow on the golden dome. what i don’t stop to think about is the loved ones i have around me, whether i just met them a few weeks ago at the dining hall, or if they’re someone i’ve known my entire life. this is a realization that has become truly apparent to me during the first several weeks of this moreau course. what i have realized most predominantly is that i am on a constant journey, looking for questions about myself, assessing my values and what exactly i believe in. first and foremost, the very first week of this course was crucial to teaching me the importance of vulnerability, and utilizing weakness to find the power within. most importantly, it taught me how i believe that while vulnerability may seem shameful, it is also where creativity, love, and belonging all originate. this idea was driven home by brené brown’s ted talk, entitled, “the power of vulnerability.” in her discussion, she talked about the magnitude of control that our fears and insecurities have over us. however, it is not until you have opened up to people (sometimes even yourself) about these feelings, as that is when you live freely and have unlocked the true power of vulnerability (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). right from the beginning, notre dame has welcomed me with open https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be arms and made it quite easy for me to be my most authentic self and truly believe this ideology which brown discusses. from the first week, i was able to build connections with people in a healthy way where i could explain my true feelings and be my vulnerable self. being a rather less emotional person, it has definitely been difficult to expose my feelings. however, this lesson allowed me to realize that i am a believer that we must use vulnerability to unlock our fullest potential. during week two, i was also able to affirm this belief. in his ted talk, david brooks goes on to ask the audience if they are living for their résumé or their eulogy (“should you live for your résumé … or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). essentially, this allowed me to look deeper into myself and decide that my answer to this question was easy: my eulogy. meaning, i want to live my life how i want to be remembered. i want to live my life for quality, attempting to have a positive impact on others throughout my entire lifetime. however, i became aware this cannot be done if one neglects the power of exposing inner weaknesses and vulnerabilities, as that is how you are able to build these connections with people, creating more meaningful, long-lasting relationships. week five really cemented these values for me, as i listened to father kevin discuss the topic of “two notre dames” and how a holy cross education can transform my mind and soul. at one point in his speech, he expresses, “nobody can be you the way that you can be you. your power lies not in who you are, but in whose you are. trust the power in you.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five) these words were truly inspiring to me because it gave an idea of the meaning of life and why we should love ourselves. while this wasn’t always that easy for me to see, after joining the notre dame community i have not only been able to open up to others, but also to myself. i have been able to build a certain aspect of trust https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 and honesty in myself, which allows me to not only live a satisfying present, but also a future that will be rooted in genuine authenticity. moreover, my second core realization that i was able to develop was how i believe that forming and cultivating relationships is necessary for my own personal growth. during week four, we learned about the various types of relationships one can form, and how to recognize one that is toxic versus healthy. one article from this week, in particular, played a crucial role in allowing me to see exactly how we know we are building positive relationships, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four) this quote stood out to me because it is something that took me a while to realize. growing up, i struggled to be a part of a solid, consistent friend group. before high school, i struggled to actually connect with friends in a way that actually meant something to me. i did not necessarily have poor friendships, however, i didn’t have a relationship with anyone i could rely on. eventually, i was able to conclude that to create these relationships, one must better connect with people and create a bond where both people in the friendship felt comforted and supported. this concept of the importance of healthy relationships was additionally clarified during week three when we delved into the idea of faith. overall, i was able to gain greater insight on the constant search for faith and a connection with god, and how that can be utilized to unlock a whole new outlook on life. father peter mccormick touched on this topic, affirming, “god can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of god, every joy and sorrow can become a prayer.” (“the role of faith in our story” by father peter mccormick moreau fye week three) this quote particularly struck me because it conveyed to me the power of faith in a way that i hadn’t really considered https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois before. as someone who has always questioned my faith, this really helped me see the point that this text and father pete were trying to make. contrary to prior beliefs, i now know that faith is not just one’s relationship with god. i am now aware that faith is the way you interact with his creations and how you use daily encounters to embrace the power of god. thus, my belief circulating around the necessity of building strong relationships is not limited to conversations with the people nearby. rather, it is also about building connections with god and everything around you. once you do this, you too can value utilizing your relationships to develop your own mind and soul. during the latter weeks of the first half of this semester, i gained a more well-rounded understanding of various perspectives. thus, i was able to form the opinion how i believe that everyone has their own, unique story that must be valued in its own, unique way. during the seventh week of moreau, i received great insight on identifying these different perspectives and how it is best for one to set biases aside to most impactfully comprehend someone’s story. chimamanda ngozi adichie clarifies this idea in her ted talk, “so that is how you create a single story. show a people as one thing, as only one thing, over and over again, and that is what they become.” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie week seven) i thought this quote was particularly captivating because it explains how toxic biases can be. it is so important for us to gain a more multi-faceted perspective on different types of people so we can avoid seeing them as one thing. approach every person with an open mind, and try to challenge yourself to value something about their story even if you cannot relate to it. this is something i feel so passionate about because it is how we combat bias and stereotypes and build greater, more impactful connections with a wider variety of individuals. coming to notre dame, i have been in contact with a more diverse group of people than ever before. if i am able to https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story approach every relationship with this mindset, i can help produce a more inclusive and enjoyable environment. week six introduced peoples’ perspectives in a different manner, challenging us to look within ourselves to identify the different influences we have had in our lives. we interacted with different poems, learning about individuals and their different life experiences and challenges they have faced (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). most effectively, it allowed me to look deeply into myself and my own perspectives and question exactly what has made me the person i am today. overall, i was able to look at my own story, and recognize the belief that my unique perspective should be valued in its own way as well. i have been fortunate enough to have been given a lot of privilege in life. from understanding other individuals’ perspectives, i was able to recognize my own point of view on a broader scale, and how i am fortunate enough to not have faced the same level of issues that many people have. ultimately, coming to notre dame and recognizing this belief of valuing various perspectives has challenged me to approach interactions with a fresh mindset, void of any preconceived opinions. this way i will be able to understand peoples’ stories in their entirety, and connect with them in a fresh, more complete way. walking through campus now, i still have an abundance of consuming thoughts that almost remove me from reality to a certain degree. on the contrary, the difference is, at the end of the day, after assessing my intrinsic beliefs, i can take my mind away from whatever i am thinking about to appreciate that beautiful sunset reflecting off of the golden dome. or, after passing a friend, i can realize how lucky i am to have them in my life and how i have the privilege of knowing their full story. this way of thinking could not be done without identifying the significance of my core beliefs. i am a believer that vulnerability is not meant to make us feel shameful, but rather, it is meant to allow us to experience love, creativity, and a sense of http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html belonging. i am a believer that initiating and maintaining different relationships is essential to personal growth. i am a believer that each individual you encounter has their own, distinctive story which must be understood in its whole. once these values are assessed, i believe that every individual can live with passion and purpose. ella gerczak professor comuniello moreau first-year experience 3 december 2021 a change of pace while many have told me that i have plenty of time to decide my major, the stringencies of the engineering curriculum at notre dame have unintentionally proved them false. to be able to take the required classes and graduate in time, i’ll need to pick my major within the year, which has led me to ask myself many questions. what do i want my major to be? what about my career? what do i want to do with life? what classes should i take, and how should i spend my time? while many of these questions go unanswered, the process of exploring them has led me to a process of re-evaluation, one that has led me to examine priorities and truly think about what direction i want my life to take. something i’ve thought about a lot during my time at notre dame is how exactly i want to spend my time. the concept of time management is mostly spoken of as working terms: ‘someone with poor time management doesn’t get their work done on time.’ and yet, there’s more to that than managing time. the first step is deciding what’s important enough to spend time on. and, having considered everything i learned in my first semester, i’ve decided to focus particularly on life balance when thinking about how to spend my time. emily bergmann, in her article “advice from a formerly lonely college student”, once wrote: “transitions are always hard — regardless of your age. but the social expectations around college put overwhelming pressure on students to fit in seamlessly into their campus, without truly acknowledging the difficulty of uprooting your life and starting fresh,” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emily bergmann moreau fye week nine). this quote really demonstrates something i’ve been struggling with on campus lately. i thought about this fact at about 11 pm, trying to choose between showering, finishing my homework due at midnight, or going to sleep at a reasonable time. (this was three days ago – the sleep was sacrificed). because of these problems i’ve been having, i’ve decided that focusing on myself and having balance should be a key part of my plans moving forward. while academics must be prioritized to some degree, i think making this more important will help my life be more fruitful. just like i do, notre dame acknowledges that college has purposes and priorities other than academics. they often use the famous quote by basil moreau himself, “the mind shall not be cultivated at the expense of the heart,” especially in campus publications (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau fye week twelve). i believe this particular notre dame goal is more virtue and moral development than wellness-focused, but i think the way we agree is interesting. something else that has increased in importance is my desire to create a community within notre dame, despite a little confusion on how to do that. parker j. palmer wrote on this topic, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received,” (“thirteen ways of looking at community… with a fourteenth thrown in for free” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this has made me wonder: is community something i should be actively striving for, or is it something that i should be forming naturally with time as a part of notre dame? the article argues that if you try too hard for community building, that natural relationships will fail to form. this is something i actually sort of understand. in the past, when i went to club meetings (like the cs club) with the express purpose of trying to make more friends, things kind of fell through. i think i’ve discovered that natural friend-building happens best when, through circumstances (like a class) you simply naturally spend a lot of time around people until you both like each other enough to hang out outside of that time frame. i think, in the future, i will do my best to be friendly, but not stress too much about trying to be friends right away. lastly, i believe that there was something ambiguous and vague that for me, now holds greater clarity thanks to my notre dame journey. that thing was the nature of disagreement, anger, and even hatred. i have read many articles and spoken to many people that have spoken about the divisiveness and division in the world today, arguing that such a thing is the reason for many problems in the world today. one of our articles reflects this opinion: “the ongoing conflicts over critical race theory have followed a predictable pattern of polarization. for catholic and jesuit schools, this division is inimical to our mission and damaging to the body of christ,” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devron – moreau fye week ten). truly read the statement. it doesn’t say, racism is causing damage. or even critical race theory is causing damage. it says this fighting is causing damage. it made me ask myself–what is the nature of disagreement, anger, and hate? when i was in foundational theology this semester, the professor gave us an article to read that talked about how homosexuality was a sin. it wasn’t an article he disagreed with, rather, it was one he promoted in class. as we were discussing the article, i thought about all the people who talked about divisiveness ruining our nation. then, i raised my hand and told the professor he was wrong. one of our articles said, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins,” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by campus ministry moreau fye week ten). and, i avoided falling into this trap. indeed, i never hated my professor. in fact, i respected him for his generally kind nature and effective teaching style. but i was angry with him for a short while. during that time, i wondered vaguely if i should hate him. should someone with such views be well-liked? i decided, over the course of my notre dame journey, that while hate may be a path to sin, that anger (if monitored, and used correctly) can be a natural and healthy form of disagreement. while this may seem surprising, i ask the reader to think: if someone hurts a mother’s child, should we expect her not to be angry? if someone hurts someone else’s friend, should we expect them to disagree politely? no. if someone is being hurt, anger is necessary. god’s often incredible anger in the old testament sometimes reflects this. he is angry because humanity is hurting each other and itself; and therefore, anger cannot be inherently sinful. and then i ask: is what the professor said not harmful? does it not promote dangerous rhetoric that could harm people in our campus community? it does, and so i have my answer. so, when i hear the question, ‘what have i encountered and how will i respond’? i’ve encountered many good things–good friends, great classes, a beautiful campus and a friendly environment. to those things, i will respond with joy. but i’ve also encountered things i don’t appreciate seeping their way into notre dame’s culture. to those things, i will respond with disagreement, divisiveness, but no hate. and, if it’s warranted–perhaps i will respond with just a little bit of anger. akinsanya_moreau first year experience integration two developing a growth mindset what have i encountered and how will i respond? throughout the span of the semester, one of the most important questions i have asked is that how do we still find and develop our unique ways of making a positive difference/transformation to the community especially after encountering brokenness? i describe brokenness as a state when we are at our lowest points due to hardships and feel defeated as a result. one of the moments i experienced brokenness was when i scored worse than i expected on a chemistry quiz that i thought i had properly prepared for. this was especially hard for me because i started having increased anxiety and stress on other exams over my understanding of the material. however, drawing from the video about the purpose of the kintsugi art (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten), and the use of gold to repair broken ceramic pieces, i learned that our hearts can be broken and this could be beneficial because it enables us to grow. the process of healing is also significant as it allows one to form greater connections to oneself. moreover, to facilitate the process of healing, i developed a conviction, one that involved engaging in the world and helping the environment (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). according to fr. john jenkins, it is important to promote love, explore our convictions, and express them in a form that helps to build respect and reduce hatred. during my time of brokenness, i took actions that helped the environment and addressed some of the main challenges of the world today such as climate change. i hoped to do something positive to improve my mindset and also have a beneficial impact to which i became more aware of my actions. i started to avoid wasting water by reducing the amount of water i used for hygienic purposes, trying to recycle plastics and paper, conserving electricity by switching off lights when https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ not in use, and trying not to waste food. i still believe there are other ways to respond when i encounter brokenness and i plan to take care of myself, spend time with people that encourage/support me, and take time to reflect on the cause, identify my mistakes and make improvements. i also hope to volunteer my time to improve the campus, practice more eco-friendly behaviors, donate when i can, and find new interests/hobbies. one thing that has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey so far is knowing my self-worth and trusting in my capabilities. i encountered dissonance during my college transition as a freshman because i doubted my capability of being accepted to notre dame and was concerned about fitting in and meeting new people. drawing from the text and video on a college student’s advice ( “advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine), i learned that it takes time to adjust to college and patience to form new and close relationships. i have to be open-minded and be in the moment to gain new experiences and meet people with similar interests while forming relationships that i will cherish. over time, i think i have formed new positive relationships and developed a sense of belonging at my hall, classroom, and in the non-competitive tennis team. moreover, drawing from the quote, “remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau ffye week nine), i learned that my self-worth shouldn't be defined by external factors. relating back to when i encountered brokenness if i let my life be dictated by a quiz score, i will become more stressed and discouraged. therefore i must strive to always do my best and during times of failure, i shouldn't doubt my capabilities or feel that i am not good enough. while my self-worth should https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau not be defined by external factors, i should start living life on my own terms and have my own unique experiences without living to others’ expectations. knowing that no one is perfect, i hope to grow by reflecting on my accomplishments during times of failure, looking back on positive feedback and the people/experiences that have brought me up to where i am, gaining confidence in my capabilities by trying new things and realizing it is ok to fail but also important to learn from my mistakes. the importance of community has also grown as a result of my notre dame journey thus far. being part of a community especially in one as engaging and close knit as alumni hall has not only reduced my anxiety of meeting new people but has also given me a chance to gain new experiences. recently, we had a spirit week called woof week where each day represented a theme and participating reinforced my sense of belonging and strengthened my connections. drawing from the quote; “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as “a capacity for connectedness”—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled, forces with names like narcissism, egotism, jealousy, competition…”(“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven), i learned that everyone including me had to have the willingness to connect to each other, while the community must be present in each of our hearts. the text also stated that being in a community involved dealing with conflicts, where confronting it brings about happiness. conflicts can occur as a form of disimilarity to which ione may not feel part of a community based on others’ implicit biases. drawing from the video about diversity, (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven) implicit bias often has a negative effect on how we view cultures in a community where we associate http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 certain ideas to a specific group. however a way to confront it is by having an openmind and being exposed to different culture experiences and view points to help resist/change our bias. this correlates to the quote, “whenever we have to shed old ways of thinking, viewing, or perceiving the world around us and ourselves, a conversion of both heart and mind must take place … we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). this shows how hope can be implemented into our daily lives and can enable us to gain new experiences/perspectives. one has to hope that in letting go of our biases, we become more open and accepting to all cultures. this applies to when i am encountering brokennes, dissonance or any thing that arise, i should have hope and faith that i can overcome ny challenges . in the case of disimilarity, i can be openminded to other people’s feelings and also be communicative while moving forward while holding resentment. i plan to continue to have hope even at my lowest point and also continue in father moreau’s vision which was to continue to spread hope and become ready for challenges https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration one integration one eight weeks at notre dame: a reflection on identity, faith, and social responsibility it’s widely believed that college is one of the most formative times in a person’s life, and already, i can see why. after just half of a semester at notre dame, i’ve had a variety of unique experiences, i’ve learned an abundance of knowledge both inside and outside of the classroom, and i’m actively seeking opportunities to foster my own personal growth. throughout my quest for self-discovery during my first few weeks here, i’ve identified three root beliefs that shape who i am at this point in time: (1) i believe that i am searching for a concrete identity and way of defining myself, (2) i believe that i grow by maintaining and engaging with my faith, and (3) i believe that i have a responsibility to look out for those around me. my first root belief, that i am searching for a concrete identity and way of defining myself, comes from the fact that i think it’s important to know who you are, and right now, i don’t think i fully know who i am. this belief influences my actions by causing me to encounter new things so that i might discover something new about myself. i’ve made an effort to meet new people, experience new activities and events, and gain new knowledge in an attempt to learn more about who i am. this belief has also played an important role in my notre dame experiences so far. by going to different club meetings, i’ve been able to find out some of things that i like and dislike. for example, by going to quizbowl practices, i’ve learned that i’m passionate about academic competition and that i enjoy being surrounded by others that share my love of trivia. on the other hand, after attending a few bajasae meetings, i realized that i’m not really interested in the inner workings of something like a car, which has been causing me to rethink my intended major of mechanical engineering. i’ve also taken time for myself to do things like walk around the lakes over the weekends. this has allowed me to learn how much i appreciate the beauty and peacefulness of nature, which is something i never realized before. i think it can be easy to sometimes just assume that we know who we are without actually thinking about it. in class we talked a lot about the impact of social media and how people’s instagram pages make it seem like they have their lives all figured out. however, it’s important to realize that although someone looking at my profile online might think they know me, the truth is that i don’t even know everything there is to know about myself. additionally, during this transition into college, it would be easy to continue to be the same person i was in high school and not make an effort to branch out and try new things, but if i took this approach, i wouldn’t get to learn anything new about myself or come any closer to defining who i am. based on the remarks of dr. brené brown, in order to truly find out who i am, it’s essential to be vulnerable, because vulnerability will allow me to be my authentic self and to find out where i belong (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). additionally, based on david brooks’ perspective, part of learning who i am means learning about both my internal and external self. not only is it important for me to explore externalities like academic success, but i also need to take time to consider internal concepts like love and forgiveness (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). writing a where i’m from poem provided me with a start on my search for my identity by reminding me about who i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim am in terms of my past, from the important people and places in my life to the sayings and ideals that have guided me (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six), but now, my task is to continue to search for myself. i’ve learned that i need to be vulnerable and that i need to consider the internal and external facets of who i am, so, under the direction of my root belief that i am searching for a concrete identity, i plan to use this knowledge to take advantage of the opportunities here at notre dame to learn more about myself and come closer to being able to define who i am. my second root belief, that i grow by maintaining and engaging with my faith, comes from the fact that faith has always been a significant part of my life. this comes primarily from my family, but also from the development of my own values. in class we took time to discuss the people in our lives that we think of when it comes to faith, and similar to many of my peers, my parents and grandparents were the ones that instilled faith in me. my belief in the importance of faith was challenged over this past summer when i wasn’t attending mass every week, but soon after arriving at notre dame, my root belief was restored and strengthened. some of my experiences here have included going to sunday and monday masses in my dorm and visiting the grotto, and in addition to these religious experiences, my faith has given me an opportunity to grow. for one, i’ve volunteered to be a lector at my dorm masses, which allows me to participate in service. i’ve also been able to make connections from my studies to my faith. for instance, reading the bible for my theology class has allowed me to be more cognizant of the readings during mass and to be a more active listener to the homily, so my faith is truly allowing me to carry out father moreau’s goal for the holy cross education: to learn and grow in terms of both faith and reason and never cultivate the mind at the expense of the heart (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five). perhaps most importantly, i’ve also learned that faith is about community. just by going to mass and taking the initiative to sit next to someone new, i’ve made several friends, and we’re able to have a closer relationship because we have the connection of a shared faith. one final noteworthy aspect of faith comes from father pete, and it is the idea of hope and knowing that the challenges we face will pass (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). being able to recognize that hardships will eventually pass is essential to growth and progress. overall, my root belief that i grow by maintaining and engaging with my faith influences my actions by not only encouraging me to say prayers and go to mass, but also by encouraging me to be a better person and try to do a good deed when i can. based on what i’ve learned about faith from the moreau course content and my experiences at notre dame so far, my goal is to strive for personal growth by continuing to engage with faith, actively seeking community, and always remaining hopeful. my third and final root belief, that i have a responsibility to look out for those around me, stems from the idea of everyone being accountable for each other. just as i try to look out for others, i would want others to look out for me and to offer help if i needed it. this belief is very much based on the culture here at notre dame. in class we talked about how we are supposed to be “our brothers’ and sisters’ keepers”. there’s also the concept of being an active bystander and following the “direct, delegate, distract” approach (“it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander” by the student athletes at the university of notre dame moreau fye week four). additionally, there’s the emphasis on greendot and the saying “no one has to do everything, but everyone has to do something” when it comes to being a bystander. based on http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view this information, there is clearly a high value placed on looking out for each other on campus. in terms of my experiences here, i’ve had nothing but positive interactions with my rector and ra, and i feel that they both care about my well-being and truly want what’s best for me. again, this shows the importance of looking out for others and the expectation that everyone is doing their part. however, the belief that i have a responsibility to look out for those around me is easily challenged by my own thoughts like, if i don’t need any help, why should i try to help others?, but this is not the right approach. even if i don’t need someone’s help at one time, i may need it some other time, and regardless, i still need to look out for those around me and do what i can if someone needs me. looking out for others is about more than just being an active bystander or caring about someone else, rather it also involves being inclusive and being open. in class, we talked a lot about the importance of being an ally, and through the course content i also learned about the danger of implicit bias and the way that we unconsciously discriminate against people (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). by these standards, looking out for others also means being there for support and advocacy and actively making an effort to recognize possible discrimination and avoid it. based on my root belief that i have a responsibility to look out for those around me, i plan to continue to grow by applying what i’ve learned and to make more of an effort to help others, be inclusive and supportive, and be an ally. overall, i have three root beliefs, which stem from my own personal experiences, my notre dame experiences, and the moreau course content: (1) i am searching for a concrete identity and way of defining myself, (2) i grow by maintaining and engaging with my faith, and (3) i have a responsibility to look out for those around me. throughout the second half of my first semester (and my college years as a whole), i plan to use these beliefs and everything that i’ve learned so far to attain personal growth. to combine my root beliefs with the goal of growth, my plans for the future are to continue to broaden my horizons to new experiences, continue to engage with faith and community, and finally to seek to help others when i can and work towards being an ally. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/keith-payne/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/laura-niemi/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/john-m-doris/ 1 archuleta moreau integration one my grandpa used to tell me to never forget about my roots. having to take the moreau first year experience class i was at first confused, but then i began to realize it was a way for me to take a step back and reflect. these past few weeks have reminded me to look at my roots and where i come from because that is what truly will allow me to succeed here. recently i have identified things that i believe will help me grow. i know that i am searching for opportunities to live a life of happiness, gratitude, and service. i understand that i forge life giving relationships by being honest, kind, impartial and open-minded. i believe that my purpose is to give back to my community. lastly, i believe that i grow by taking chances, by allowing myself to learn more about myself and others, and discovering new meanings in life. in august, i was told by my family and peers to work hard and be successful when i began my new life here at notre dame. before college, people would describe me as a successful and a talented individual who was going to do big things in the world. i always worried about what people thought of me because i wanted to make everyone proud. though i was trying so hard to impress the many people in my life, i strayed away from making one person proud and that was me. when i was focusing on perfection i was focusing on the end goal. i did not think and give thought to the process. i just knew that failure was never an option. i saw failure as my biggest fear and in the first week of being here i was told i was going to fail. i learned to understand that the reason i was scared to fail was because i was scared of being vulnerable. understanding the importance of failure was said in the first tedtalk we had to watch, “when we numb those [feelings of vulnerability], we numb joy, we numb gratitude, we numb happiness. and we are miserable looking for purpose and meaning” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). brown’s message was clear and delivered with intent to 2 archuleta reveal that without failure i will never be successful. understanding how i can learn from my own failures will only help me grow to be the person i want to be. learning to accept failure was only the first step. the second aspect was to gain insight on how to balance success and empathy. david brooks explains that “[t]hese two sides of our nature are at war with each other” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). he explains that people often put their resume first and do not take time to reflect on love, gratitude, and feelings. i was at war with my own feelings because again, i felt vulnerable. but when i was pushing away those feelings that defined my humanity, i was pushing away my faith as well. when i learned to put myself in a vulnerable position i felt like i was allowing god to be a part of me. “the spiritual person can see the glory of god in the world...everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary, no one is ordinary,...” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). these words by fagerberg were very relevant to my situation because once i started to allow god into my life i began to be more appreciative of those around me. even though i may resist him sometimes, i know that i must let him help and guide me because he only wants me to be happy and be the best version of myself. finding good in everything has allowed me to become a better person which includes treating everyone with kindness and respect. when you treat everyone with kindness and respect you form healthy relationships, but it is important to understand that “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). olivia taylor provided valuable knowledge about how the best type of friends uplift each other and grow together. entering a new environment, friendships will have a great 3 archuleta impact on my life and journey. so far i have made several friends who i know will help me and have helped me with my adjustment here on campus. i have formed friendships with people in my classes, in my dorm, and in clubs that i have joined. before continuing with my journey i felt the necessary need to reflect on my roots and where i come from. identifying who i am and what my purpose in life is will help me see my path. in the sixth week of moreau fye the poems we wrote were perhaps my favorite assignment so far. i was able to discuss my home and it made me miss home as well. the smells, sounds, and sights of home are all a part of me and i will carry them with me wherever i go. my identities and stories are also what shape me. “[s]tories can also be used to empower and humanize. stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). adichie emphasized the power stories hold and it is important to not forget those stories. my grandpa always used to tell me stories about his experiences and they taught me many lessons that pertain to my situations today. so far my journey has only just begun. within the first few weeks here i have learned much about myself and i will continue to be open to learning more. perhaps the quote that has pertained to me the most from my moreau was one that explored power, “the way to grow your power is indeed to give it away” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” delivered by carla ann harris moreau fye week five). attending a very prestigious university i feel honored to be given the opportunity to further my education. my home has very few people who attend college and i want to bring back the knowledge that i will learn here and share it with my community. the only way i can be successful and to grow my power is indeed to give it away and share it with others. understanding that my purpose is to help others and my 4 archuleta home keeps me grounded, but i know that i must be engaged with my faith, strengths, and weaknesses in order to grow and improve who i am. spring moreau integration 2 capstone integration moreau fye 4/29/22 personal mission statement: a compass in my decision making “if you are humble nothing will touch you, neither praise nor disgrace, because you know what you are” ( quote by mother teresa). in mother teresa’s quote, she emphasizes the importance of humility and using one’s own personal attributes not for personal gain but rather to instill peace and goodness in the world so that each human being can thrive through being his or her unique self. i have come to know that the best possible way to truly live an enriched life is to recognize my unique qualities and use those qualities to instill goodness throughout the world. this has truly been a compass throughout my life and has provided a foundation for my own mission statement that has provided a compass in every aspect of my life. this can be achieved through recognizing my own values and therefore embracing them in a way that they can provide a compass throughout my life and help strengthen my own personal mission that i will follow throughout my life. i have come to know that the values that have truly guided me and made me into the person that i am today are my faith, family, service with others, and my passion to seek good. each of these values have ignited a fire within me to recognize and embrace my unique self and have therefore guided me to live life that is “welllived”. as i continue to grow in my college experience, i hope that these values will continue to be cultivated throughout my time at notre dame, whether it is through my involvement in the notre dame community as well as through the relationships that i build during my time here. this will therefore provide further assistance in truy discerning and guiding me in the right direction for my career goals as well as provide a catalyst in my passion to use my own personal qualities as a means for good. therefore, my personal mission statement has stemmed from a variety of different experiences that have made be into that person i am today; however, it also involves my values https://yourstory.com/herstory/2019/08/10-inspirational-quotes-mother-teresa that have provided a compass in my decision making and have emboldened me to take actions toward contributing to a world where each person can thrive and live an enriched life. ever since i was a child, i have always had a passion to investigate within myself on my own personal attributes and ways that i can better myself in a way that represents my genuine self. throughout my life, i have encountered a series of different hindrances that have been a result of judgment from others for expressing my uniqueness. during certain points of judgment and harsh criticism from others, i questioned whether i should conform to the social norm and sacrifice truly living an enriched life for the sake of others. this was similarly discussed in a video by the grotto, in which the speaker states, “...when hardships and unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things we do not have”("5 minutes" by aria swarrmoreau fye week 6). in this quotation, it exemplifies one of the major downfalls that result from criticism from others or one’s own self-criticism. during my own times of hardships, i found myself questioning my own self and therefore compared myself to others. however, i ultimately refused to truly conform to what was “normal” and therefore delve deeper into ways that i can express myself in a unique way. this guided me to strengthen my own values and use my values as a compass in my decision making even when others may not be doing the right thing. one value that has truly provided a catalyst in my passion to embrace my unique qualities is my family. ever since i was a child, my family has truly provided a support and source of guidance in navigating through life as well as through the process of discerning and understanding who i am. one of the major members in my family that has truly helped me reach this point is my mom. in an interview with my mom, she discussed that i am truly driven with a passion and mission to help others throughout every aspect of my life (moreau fye week 5). through having a figure that truly recognizes my genuine passions, it has guided me to become more passionate in further cultivating these interests and therefore exemplifying my unique self on a deeper level. this has also guided me to value my family on a deeper level and therefore give back to https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 those who have supported me in discerning my path of life. not only has my family guided me to understand my own personal qualities, but my faith, another core value, stemmed from my family. throughout my life, my family has truly provided me with a strong foundation in my faith and has therefore allowed me to truly appreciate and embrace my relationship with god. ever since i was young, i have always understood the importance of prayer and i would pray each night before i went to bed with my mom and my sister. however, as i became older, i became more intentional with prayer in which i began to understand that prayer is truly a conversation with god in which i have the ability to understand god and also gain clarity on god’s plan for me. through deep contemplative prayer, i was able to experience self reflection which allowed me to truly look within myself and recognize my positive and even faulty qualities. in an article by pico iyer, he discusses the importance of taking a break from the hectic situations in life and experiencing a sense of presence in order to truly develop a sense of self awareness and appreciation ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). this is extremely applicable to prayer, in which through prayer i have the ability to take a moment away from the business of life and therefore have a genuine and focused conversation with god. through experiencing the present moment, prayer has allowed me to truly recognize god’s abounding love for me and has caused me to feel emboldened to take steps toward embracing the unique qualities that god has blessed me with. through immersing myself in prayer and strengthening my faith, i began to understand and recognize god’s love and presence on a deeper level throughout every aspect of my life, whether it was through an experience with a family member or with someone i did not know. in an article by jacob walsh, he discusses this on a deeper level by stating, “he told me that i could not convince myself that god loved me. ‘you can ask him to show you, though. and you can pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved.”’ ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10). this shows that god’s love involves experience and rather it can be understood through interacting and developing relationships with others. through being able to first experience god’s love and support https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 toward embracing my own qualities, i have the ability to recognize god’s presence within each person i encounter. therefore, i hope to continue to use my faith as a means for my own self-development but also as an outlet to truly make a positive impact on the world. i have come to know that through recognizing the beauty in the unique qualities that each person possesses, i have the ability to help contribute to a world where each human being has the opportunity to thrive and live an enriched life. throughout my life, i have always had an inert desire to make a difference in the lives of others. i have truly found that god has called me to use my passions as a means for the greater good for all human beings. whether it was through volunteering in philadelphia at a soup kitchen or traveling to haiti for an immersion trip, service truly involves uniting with those who are struggling and therefore assisting them in developing into the best person they can possibly be. in an article by steve reifenberg, he further discusses his experience with service during an immersion trip by stating, “they accompanied me – especially the kids – as they taught me spanish, and as they helped me understand the complexities of their lives and the possibilities for finding some paths forward, which we began to work on together” (“teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9). this shows that through accompaniment, i have the ability to not only assist those in need, but also unite with each person i encounter and further develop connections that may have not been made without accompaniment. similarly, in the novel tattoos on the heart, father greg boyle further addresses the idea of uniting with others by stating, “ “close both eyes: see with the other one...our sphere has widened and we find ourselves quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love. we’ve wandered into god’s own ‘jurisdiction’” (tattoos on the heart by father gregory boylemoreau fye week 7). this powerful quotation provides a beautiful image of the impact that uniting with others and instilling kinship will have on the world. i plan to use this idea of uniting with others as a compass throughout my life and especially make it a center in discerning my career path in a way that will embrace every human being rather than just certain individuals. ever since i was young, i have always been passionate about learning about the human body as well as using my knowledge as a means to make a positive difference in the lives of others. this has led me to aspire to pursue a career in the medical field in which i can use my passions as a means to assist and support the health of others. this process of discerning a career is further addressed in an article by the meruelo center for career development, “he contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills.” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). therefore, i have come to know that one of the most important components in living an enriched life involves choosing a career that coincides with my own values and therefore allows me to to use those values as a means for enhancing my own life as well as accompanying others in doing so as well. however, i hope to move closer to accomplishing these goals through utilizing my notre dame education as a means in delving into ways that i can use my passions that invests in notre dame’s mission of using values as a means for positive change. throughout my short time at notre dame, i have noticed that there are numerous examples of those who have utilized their education for a greater purpose. this was exemplified in the domer dozen, which provided a series of different individuals from a variety of different backgrounds who used his or her notre dame education to accomplish a common purpose, which is to enrich the lives of others through providing opportunities that enhance inclusivity and help alleviate certain issues throughout the world. ("the domer dozen" by notre dame alumni associationmoreau fye week 2). during my four years at notre dame, i aspire to live out this purpose of creating a common good among everyone but also in enhancing the unity within the notre dame community in order to enhance the overall mission of the university. this was further discussed in week 11 of moreau discussion, in which through encountering and conversing with a diverse group of individuals i have teh ability to develop a well rounded perspective and understand the world on a deeper level. however, i have come to know that the key in living an enriched life involves https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ experiencing and bringing joy. in an article by fr. michael himes, he describes joy by stating, “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”(“three key questions” by father michael himesmoreau fye week 3). i have come to know that some of the most life-changing experiences have come from experiencing a genuine sense of joy. the majority of these experiences have stemmed from making a positive difference in the lives of others whether it was through completing an act of service with others or further developing a life-enriching relationship with another. i hope that throughout my life, i will continue to experience this sense of joy and therefore bring joy to the lives of others as well. therefore, my personal mission statement has continued to change throughout different experiences that i have encountered during my lifetime. however, my personal mission statement continues to center around my major values which are faith, family, service with others, and my passion to seek good. these values have continued to provide a compass in my decision making and have aided me in navigating throughout every situation in my life. as i continue my notre dame education, i hope to continue to build upon these values and apply them throughout my journey here at notre dame in order to truly receive a well-rounded education and further live out not only notre dame’s mission but my own as well. therefore, i aspire to use my personal mission statement as a source of support and guidance throughout my time at notre dame and therefore live a life that is enriched and filled with joy. moreau integration 1 believing in me i believe that i am a leader. i believe that i grow through vulnerability. i believe that i am responsible to be a kind person to myself and those around me. i believe that i am spiritual and am on a journey of discovery of faith. i believe that i stand up for myself and put myself first when it comes to relationships as well as other things. the first week that we moved back into the dorms this fall, i got a pretty weird email. i was told that my tennis coach had nominated me to go on a “leadership retreat” for student-athletes. going into this retreat, i continuously asked myself the question of “why am i going on this trip?” and thinking to myself, “the last thing i am is a leader”. over this weekend retreat, we talked a lot about the idea of vulnerability. quite perfectly, this happened to be the same week we discussed the idea of vulnerability in moreau. before coming to campus, i treated myself pretty much the same way you would treat someone you hate. i constantly brought myself down at any chance i got, but i never understood that it impacted the people around me. as brené brown says in her ted talk, “we can’t practice compassion with other people if we can’t treat ourselves kindly” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this quote has come back to me over and over again this semester, and really resonates with the person i want to be. if i want to be an empathetic, kind, and decent person to the people i surround myself with, it has to start within me first. along those same lines, i’ve learned that courage plays a huge role in your ability to be vulnerable, be a good leader, and more. in david brooks’ ted talk, he said that an adam ii was built through “a lack of courage” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). he talked more about courage which i’ve recently learned is extremely powerful. without having the courage to be vulnerable, the courage to speak out, the courage to be who you are, it is impossible to truly be the person you want to be. being courageous is an extremely powerful step in becoming a leader, a true version of yourself, and building connections with other people. though i know it starts with me first, i also hope that i can an impact in whatever i do and make a difference in the people’s lives around me. this really relates to carla harris’s “pearls” of life, one of them being “it is what you do for others that counts” (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week 5). it’s important to care for yourself and be the best version of yourself that you can be, however, what you do for other people is what matters. i also believe that i am spiritual and am on a journey of discovery of faith. when talking about the role faith plays in our journey, father pete says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick – moreau fye week 3). this quote makes me feel really hopeful. i have a weird relationship with religion and have for a while. i was raised in a hindu household but as i got older, i had a lot of questions about organized religion. though i think of myself as spiritual, religion is something that has always raised questions and doubt in my head. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://youtu.be/lczmeqwwois moreau integration 1 despite this, having faith in a greater power has gotten me through dark times in my life. though i may not believe in the god of hinduism, or christianity, or anything else, i do believe that in a higher power, and the idea that everything happens for a reason. this spirituality really powers me and keeps me going and is why i believe it’s such an important part of me. when it comes to relationships with others, i believe that i am a good friend, a kind person, and have a positive impact on the people i am surrounded by. since coming to notre dame, i’ve learned the importance of having healthy relationships and surrounding yourself with the right people. in week three, we read that, “if the majority of the things that come out of your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them ” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four). unfortunately, i have learned how to deal with toxic relationships like this and have learned to put up boundaries. this means prioritizing yourself, and even being “picky” with the people you choose to surround yourself with. it makes the biggest difference in your life, and passes on to the people who you affect as well. i’ve especially learned, since coming to notre dame, how important it is to surround yourself with people who lift you up, support you, and love you for who you really are. it makes the biggest difference in your life, your attitude, how you treat yourself, and how you treat others. along those same lines, it’s important to remember that everyone is always going through their own battles, and having the patience to be kind to people even in their toughest moments makes a difference. in chimamanda adichi’s ted talk, she says, “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichi – moreau fye week seven). this quote really describes something that i hope to never do. i hope to never reduce someone to a “single story” or single action. i don’t want to be a person who makes others feel small, and i hope to never have a negative impact on people’s lives. this makes me hopeful that i always treat people with respect, kindness, and an open heart. everyone is facing battles and remembering that is so important. this really speaks to the type of person i hope to be and the way i treat others. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story?utm_campaign=tedspread&utm_medium=referral&utm_source=tedcomshare week 13 integration two moreau first experience course professor pruitt 3 december 2021 experincing a new life after starting my new journey at the university of notre dame i have encountered many new experiences and learned new things about myself that i believe would not have been possible without the transition to notre dame. i’ve learned to deal with imposter syndrome in my life not only in school but as i continue into my career path. i have also seen first hand the gender differences between women and men and have experineced the drastic affects in communities. i began to understand my personal connection to god based on my life experiences leading up to nd and the way i’ve connected with god on campus. i’ve grown and learned all these new concepts and experiences by understanding the importance of community, within notre dame and examples of life after nd. as a caribbean american woman at a pwi, i have faced imposter syndrome very early in the school year. imposter syndrome can be explained as “people who are highly skilled or accomplished tend to think others are just as skilled. this spiral into feelings that they don’t deserve accolades and opportunities over other people.” i have felt like this when in new learning environments where i may not grasp concepts as fast as others may, making me feel like i’m not smart enough or deserving enough to attend such a prestigious institution. it has also been proven to be more prevalent in poc, the ted talk “what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox, she explains that imposter syndrome is “...though it may be more prevalent and disproportionately affect the experiences of underrepresented or disadvantaged groups.” ( "what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine) i have seen this first hand as i have spoken to many upperclassmen of color about their experiences at nd and all have given similar stories and advice. having imposter syndrome can make an individual feel like their best isn’t good enough then causing them to give less than what they usually do, that is why talking about it and learning that other people suffer from the same thoughts can help you feel less alone and you’ll begin to believe you belong. i have started to feel more comfortable after speaking with upperclassmen because i no longer felt like i was experiencing this alone. women and people of color have always been underrepresented within every community in america, and still, in some forms, we are. kirsten helgeson, a kintsugi artist, has created a safe space for women to come together to let go of the hardships in their lives, whether personal or social. kirsten’s goal is to “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten) however, why is it that women have to be given certain outreaches in order to find healing? it is a good thing that these spaces are created for women to come together but would we need them if we weren’t put in a bubble, to begin with? women are still in a constant battle for equality, but it has improved over the years. the battle for poc however is still a loud and strong battle being fought. alumni of catholic schools “demand that their schools implement curriculum, student formation, hiring, and programmatic measures to promote greater diversity, equity, and inclusion (d.e.i.). they want to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ see accountability and progress in meeting measurable goals in these areas.” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten) after the death of george floyd. why aren’t these programs and curriculums already formed in not only catholic schools but all schools, diversity especially in communities that poc spend a lot of time in, such as schools and jobs, are very inspiring to young children in what they can accomplish? it can also be a learning experience for those who may not come in contact with poc very often, learning ways to avoid discrimination and microaggressions. our country says that equality for all is in place but systematically we have a lot of growing to do. my personal understanding of how to live and grow in hope is similar to what i’ve been exposed to growing up. in order to maintain a relationship with god and have that hope and faith in him, it is not necessary to be a heavy part of the church life but to be faithful and live your life in his word and his doings. the holy cross and christian education text explain this concept by saying, “human life is only a long way of the cross. it is not necessary to enter the chapel or the church to run over the various stations. the way of the cross is everywhere, and we walk along with it every day in spite of ourselves and often unknown to us.” ( holy cross and christian education by a publication of campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve) i have seen this from both perspectives. being heavily involved in the church is a great way to stay connected to your faith and those who will support you in your faith journey, however, my first-hand experience has shown me that maintaining hope and my connection with my faith is solely based on the way i involve my practices and values into my everyday life in the likeliness of god and his ways of living. community is an important addition to any area of many people. one main reason for having an inflated sense of community is to be able to have people in your corner to help you https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105431/holycrossandchristianeducation.pdf https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105431/holycrossandchristianeducation.pdf through hard times. the article “thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer explains this by saying, “community that can withstand hard times and conflict can help us become not just happy but at home.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) and “hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) these express that by creating a safe and loving community, even with downfalls, there will always be a group of people who will be there during your hardships and pick you back up. these experiences also allow for the community to be real and genuine, because of the hardships that are handled together instead of only looking for the good. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ integration 2 chapa 1 moreau first year experience dec. 1, 2021 the eye opening first year encounters as my first notre dame semester is coming to a close, i’ve experienced new positive and negative things that have helped me improve in many aspects of my life. coming into notre dame, i was simply a shy person that preferred to keep everything to myself, but the community changed all that and led me to becoming an open and interacting person. i can say that exposure to new things in one's life really provides the opportunity to change them for the better. i’ve encountered positive things like student interaction which helped boost my confidence and i’ve even experienced negative things like high levels of stress because of classes and homework which provided me with the opportunity to find change in my life so i’d do better: change such as organization and asking for help whenever i might need it. all these new encounters have been making me a better student and overall a better person everyday. coming into notre dame, i knew how amazing and challenging of a school it was and as students, you might end up questioning your abilities just as i have. you might think that you don’t belong where you are right now. this thought process is known as imposter syndrome where you start doubting yourself and your abilities to do something. a quote that says “ if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i’ve experienced imposter syndrome and expected myself to do nothing but great during my first semester. i set goals to do great and did nothing but doubt myself whenever i couldn't achieve them. it’s important for people to know that success isn’t always achieved the first time and that it might take multiple attempts to be at the top. i try to tell myself everyday that i’m here for a reason regardless if i get a bad grade or don’t understand something, and that everything will work out in the end. factors such as stressing out and doubting yourself can lead you to feeling broken and useless at times but there are many ways to prevent that from happening. there can be other factors such as racism or discrimination problems that can occur that can cause the breakdown of a person. within an article i read, it was stated that “namely, its claimed that racism exists in systems or structures, as opposed to consisting merely of private acts of bigotry committed by individuals” (“should caqtholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devront, s.j. moreau fye week ten). act of racism can really break a person and at times we never see it occurring around us. notre dame is seen to be a community full of diversity that accepts everyone as who they truly are. i’m lucky to say that i haven’t experienced any racism and i am confident to say that i wouldn't occur to be here at notre https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/voices/christopher-j-devron-sj chapa 2 dame. however, if you are a victim of racism, you will forsure have so many people that have your back as well as resources on campus that can help you with any problem. encountering some of the most positive things on campus has allowed me to respond positively right back. being able to feel as if you instantly click within the notre dame community has been such a blessing where everyone interacts in the best ways possible, so i make sure to throw in as much positivity as i can within those interactions. i was luckily able to find my people here on campus in a short amount of time, in which i can already call my family. in an article that basically lists and explains ways to look at a community, i learned that finding your community depends on factors like having the right people, the right vibes, and the right communication. this article provides us with the idea that “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” parker j. palmer, moreau fye week eleven), so when it comes to looking for community, we just have to interact with the right people that are pure at heart in accepting one another. being part of a community comes with many benefits such as never feeling alone and having the ability to approach people you’re comfortable with. my community at notre dame gives me the confidence and hope to keep on moving forward everyday without giving up. when i arrived at notre dame, i wasn’t completely familiar with what i was getting myself into, but i for sure knew that it was going to be challenging. it has been a rough first semester for me but it is something i will adjust to and get better at each year. within times of difficulty is when i was able to encounter hope. i have hope in being able to successfully complete all first semester courses and be able to learn from them. scriptures of motivation like one i was provided with during my moreau course showed me that “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing more into the sort of creature he wants it to be.”(“the screwtape letters” pages 44-47 by c.s lewis, moreau fye week twelve.) i found this to be very true especially during the times that i felt like giving up. important people like those within my community, the idea of what my future will look like after notre dame, and my family are all the things that give me hope in being successful no matter how tough things get. encountering hope helped me encounter that never give up mindset that many people around me have and anyone is capable of thinking like that. being a notre dame student has provided me with the opportunity to become a better person in many ways. i’ve been lucky enough to build strong friendships and encounter both positive and negative things that have taught me great things. my response to my positive encounters is to follow those encounters and my response to my negative encounters was to prevent them from ever occurring again. i want to grow to become my best self, considering the position in my life right now, i am more than capable of doing that as well as helping others become their best selves. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://www.samizdat.qc.ca/arts/lit/pdfs/screwtapeletters_csl.pdf moreau integration 1 van bell 1 the integration and formation of my core beliefs: moreau integration one i believe that i am searching for my most authentic self. as i began my college journey here at notre dame, i made a promise to myself to “put myself out there.” in high school, i was often shy when meeting new people. i was worried about being judged and being rejected, so i often did not let my true self show. at notre dame, i knew that everyone else was also going to be seeking out new friendships, so what did i have to lose? nothing at all. watching brene brown’s tedtalk1 on vulnerability helped form my perspective on why it was so important to be my most authentic self in order to find friends at notre dame. naturally, i avoid vulnerability because it makes me feel uncomfortable. my brain is trying to save me from possible harm, so it takes a conscious decision to override the discomfort of vulnerability and make my true self known. i believe that i seek community and connection by forging meaningful friendships. one quote that stuck with me was from the grotto network article2 that i read for week four of moreau: “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” i think this perfectly sums up what a meaningful friendship should look like. mutual growth is such an incredible part of a friendship. growth can occur from challenges, so it does not necessarily mean that every second of every friendship is sunshine and daisies. rather, the challenges that arise help your friendship grow stronger. one of the ways that i have found meaningful friendships at notre dame is through shared experiences. many of my friends i have found through my smaller glynn honors classes and also through my dorm. having shared class experiences, such as in glynn, helps me forge connections with other people. my friends in ryan 2 ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" olivia t. taylor, moreau week four) 1 (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau week one) https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 van bell 2 hall i met through going to a workout class together, another shared experience. i grew up playing a lot of sports, so finding friends who also did and want to continue being physically active was great because we can socialize every day when we run together or go to duncan to work out. i believe that having hope, faith, and love will help me to discover my purpose in life as i move through life’s journeys. something that i have often struggled with is maintaining hope in times when i feel anxious or sad. when i am overwhelmed with schoolwork, i often worry about my family, friends, the future, if i am making the right decisions, wondering why i am struggling through my difficult classes, and on and on. reading the student reflections on faith helped me because i could relate to many of them, especially mariana’s reflections3 on feeling the pressure of perfection. having the framework of hope, faith, and love is such an important guiding force in my life, and i love that it is also an important guiding force in many of my friend’s lives as well. when i feel like i cannot possibly handle everything, i am reminded that god is with me and that his love for me exists even when i feel like i am not deserving of it. i may not know what my life’s journey will be, and that is okay. i do not need to have my life planned out because god is with me along the way. so as long as i keep hope, faith, and love in my heart, i will find my purpose. i believe that i grow by being vulnerable and honest, both with myself and with others. the character strengths and weaknesses test4 helped me to be honest with myself about what i am good at, and what i am still working on. i’ve always known that i love learning and that was no surprise to me when it was my top strength. i also was not surprised to see bravery as my biggest weakness. i think it can be difficult to recognize our own weaknesses, but it is really 4 (“via character strengths survey”, moreau week two) 3 (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry, moreau week three) https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view van bell 3 powerful to do so because it comes back to the idea of vulnerability which brene brown discussed. ever since the character strengths assessment, i have been consciously working on my bravery, particularly in social situations. it can be uncomfortable to talk to somebody new, but the worst thing that can happen is they aren’t friendly, and then so what? the best case scenario is that i make a new friend. another way that being honest with myself has been important is recognizing implicit biases5. being at notre dame and interacting with people who have all sorts of different backgrounds has helped me to become aware of some of my previously held generalizations, and therefore to grow as a person. i believe that my roots ground me, but i should not be afraid to branch out. the “where i’m from” poem assignment from week six helped me to realize that my hometown, my family, and my childhood experiences play a critical role in shaping who i am today. they continue to be important forces in my life, in particular my family. my family is a grounding force that really helps me in times of stress and uncertainty. i know that they are always there for me, and for that i am extremely grateful. these past eight weeks at notre dame have shown me that even though i may be physically away from my family, i am not alone. additionally, i have learned how to branch out and forge new relationships. all of my closest friends here i met less than eight weeks ago but it truly feels like i have known them for years. i am so grateful for the level of trust and connection i have with them, and this would not have been possible if we all had not been brave enough to reach out and form a friendship. i believe that i am made to be a force for good in the world. notre dame’s motto of forming students who are “forces for good in the world” is a really profound message for me. in particular, fr. kevin’s video6 from week five helped shape my view on how i can be a force for 6( “two notre dames: your holy cross education”, fr. kevin grove, c.s.c., moreau week five) 5 (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american, moreau week seven) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ van bell 4 good: “we cannot love the god we cannot see if we do not love the brother that we can see.” helping others however i can, whenever i can, is so important in being a force for good. ultimately, my notre dame education is going to help me serve the world in whatever way god calls me to serve. i am not sure what that is yet, but i know that i have a calling greater than myself, and i will continue on my journey of discovering my purpose these next four years and onward. professor thigpen moreau 14 october 2021 my growth at notre dame throughout my time that i will spend at notre dame, i believe that i am searching for relationships with people that accept me for who i am completely. i am searching for friends that give me a sense of belonging, which is something i did not find as much as i would have liked to in high school. during week one, we discussed how to search for relationships that give love and provide a sense of belonging. one key piece of advice that dr. brené brown gave spoke to the quality that a person needs in order to form these relationships: self-confidence. “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging. that’s it. they believe they’re worthy” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brownmoreau fye week one). it is understandable to have doubt in oneself at times as everyone has insecurities that they can be self-conscious of. but it is important to remember that in order to receive a sense of belonging, a person needs to feel like they deserve to feel welcomed and loved. in order to forge life-giving relationships, i believe that i must learn from the “adam 2” side of my personality, as david brooks discusses in his ted talk. during brooks’ ted talk, he discusses the two sides that every person has to their personality. in his talk, adam 1 is described as someone who is hungry for success. adam 2 is described as the loving and faithful part of a person. he claims that often these sides are at war with one another; that people tend to only focus on adam 1 and get caught up in the tangible successes of life (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week 2). also, a person tends to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim dismiss the adam 2 side of their personality because essentially, in order to grow as a person, one must fail. this idea is important when forming new relationships like i am doing currently in my first year at notre dame. it is critical to remember that failure is inevitable and the main idea a person must focus on is how to learn from the experience. to go off this idea of forming relationships, it is also important to know when you are in a bad or unhealthy relationship. in the article “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship,” author olivia taylor centers her second idea or “sign” around listening. to talk about this idea, she opens with the quote “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylormoreau fye week 4). one of the most aggravating things to deal with in a friendship is the feeling that what you are saying is not valued by the other person, that they aren’t even listening to what you have to say. this article teaches its readers that if you find yourself in this situation a lot in a certain friendship, it may be a good idea to either talk to the friend about it or to end the friendship. while sometimes it can be very difficult to end a relationship with someone you care about, it is critical that a person puts their own health and well-being first. one way that i believe i can grow as a person during my time at notre dame is taking advantage of the heavy presence of faith on campus. coming from a public school, i never had the opportunity to take religion or theology classes as part of my curriculum. also, i never had the chance to experience the support system that having faith on campus provides for students as it does at notre dame. when discussing faith at notre dame, we were given the chance to listen to father pete discuss the role of faith in a person’s life. beginning with a knot analogy, father pete gave the advice of looking at every problem, or knot, differently. he discussed how every problem is different, so one should remember that the solution will also be different (“the role https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormickmoreau fye week 3). while every problem and solution may be different, though, it is always helpful and important to have a sense of hope when faced with obstacles. this is where practicing faith or simply interacting with the faith community on campus can help to keep a sense of hope that every challenge can be conquered. in conjunction with the presence of faith on campus, something that is unique about notre dame is that they are interested in educating every person as a student and as a person. kevin grove discussed this idea in his video talking about a notre dame student’s holy cross education. grove claims that “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by kevin grovemoreau fye week 5). when choosing to go to notre dame, one of the things that i valued most about the university is that they value educating you as a person just as much, if not more, than educating you through knowledge in classes. while classes such as calculus and accounting focus more on educating my mind, classes such as theology and moreau have a focus on educating the heart as well. attending public schools my whole life, i have never been exposed to this way of thinking or educating inside the classroom. it was expected that every person learned these valuable lessons from home or sometimes activities outside of the classroom. while it true that i have learned many important lessons from my parents, there is something truly different and special about learning these lessons with fellow classmates. one thing that i have appreciated from getting to know people at notre dame is how different everyone’s background is. while it is refreshing now to be exposed to so many different cultures and lifestyles, i was not exposed to this much diversity as a child. in the ted talk “the danger of a single story,” speaker chiramanda ngozi adichie talks about the massive effects https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 that stories and the specific stories we are exposed to have on our perspective. the story that resonated with me in her ted talk was when she spoke about her experience at an american university being from africa. when adichie arrived at college, her roommate was surprised that adichie did not fit the poor and uncivilized stereotype that american literature tends to depict about africans (“danger of a single story” by chiramanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week 7). listening to adichie’s story emphasizes the point to not be as closed-minded. while we cannot help what diversity, or lack thereof, we have been exposed to as children, a person should keep an open mind and welcome diversity. for week six, we were given the opportunity to write a poem about where we come from and our personal stories. writing this poem gave me the chance to reflect on how my life at home and upbringing has affected my first months at notre dame. the opportunities i was given throughout high school combined with the support and love from my family eventually lead me to have the opportunity to attend notre dame. and while i have only been here for a few short months, i have learned so many valuable lessons both in moreau and outside of the classroom that i will carry with me during my time at notre dame and life afterwards. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story 1. ‘encountering dissonance’ by elizabeth cox, week 9 2. ‘ecountering brokeness’ by pope francis, week 10 3. ‘encountering community’ by pamer and parker, week 11 4. ‘encountering hope’ by fthr james b king, week 12 moreau integration what have i encountered and how will i respond? what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? before arriving at notre dame, i set myself a series of goals that i wished to achieve throughout my time here. i set short term goals for the first semester, and long-term goals which included my first year and my full four years. upon reflection on my first semester, i feel that i have achieved a lot of the goals that i set out to achieve, and i have also gained essential knowledge and insight which will allow me to set new goals for the semester ahead. one of these goals was that i wanted to re-engage with my spirituality, as this is something that was not a huge part of my life back home. i have always been curious about living a more religious life and how it may benefit me. i thought that there would be no better time nor place to attempt to reconnect with god as i transitioned to notre dame. i wanted to challenge myself to be more openminded with my faith, and to try reconnecting with my faith journey. through my motivation to become closer with god, i have begun to become involved with religious activities and posts on campus. within my dorm i attend dorm masses every week and read at these masses, and i try to spend some time at the grotto every day to reflect and connect with myself. this gives me an opportunity to give back to my new home that has gratuitously welcomed me in. in parker palmer’s article from week 11 3., he stated, ‘the fundamental aspect of community is giving back’. through my spiritual journey, i have found a way to become a pillar in my new community which feels very rewarding. furthermore, i have begun to go to bed twenty minutes earlier at night, to give myself time to reflect on the day that has just gone past through prayer, and i set mental goals and targets for the day that will follow. what i have come to realise about my faith is that even though i recognise that there may not be a god, the physical act of praying and being at one with myself and allowed me to grow immensely in my first few months here. taking time out of my day to slow down and comprehend my thoughts has allowed me to find more solace in myself. i found a quote from father james b king from week 124. ‘hope is trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom’ very interesting, as over these past few months through my trust in god and the cross, i have begun to be filled with more hope that each day will be better than the last. ultimately, through my prayer and meditation, i have begun to have more faith in god, and more selfassuredness in myself. the ironic clarity that i have become more assured about these past few months is that i am still certain that i don’t know what i would like to do after university. as an incoming college student, i had a vague comprehension of what route i would take in my studies, and this feeling has still not changed after my first semester. i have a vague concept of what i would like to do after university, however it seems everyone around me knows exactly what they want to do and where they want to go. this has in turn enhanced my clarity that i don’t mind not knowing what i don’t want to do, as maybe no plan is the best plan. i thoroughly enjoy my classes and i am unbelievably happy to attend this fantastic university. my personal plan is to continue enjoying my classes and try to do the best that i can possibly do in each class. this way, i feel that my path will become clearer to me as i go deeper into my studies. one thing i have encountered here at notre dame is the sheer kindness of the people here on campus. this does not surprise me, as before attending notre dame i heard an awful lot about the strong, tight knit community, and how everyone is made to feel welcome. it reminds me of a quote 1. ‘encountering dissonance’ by elizabeth cox, week 9 2. ‘ecountering brokeness’ by pope francis, week 10 3. ‘encountering community’ by pamer and parker, week 11 4. ‘encountering hope’ by fthr james b king, week 12 from pope francis from week 10 2., ‘show humility and kindness to those around you, it is the most important gift we have to give’. this holds very true, and it has been a huge source of comfort for me in my first few months. although i am thousands of miles from home in ireland, the ‘fighting irish’ community has made me feel right at home ‘under the dome’. my peers from ireland have also been great in ensuring we all transition smoothly into this new life. we all act as a strong support system for each other, something that seems quite unique and special. the kindness and warmth that has been shown to me has only made me develop a gratuitous attitude, and a willingness to show the same warmth to others. the opportunity to give back to this amazing community is one that i plan to act on. one thing that took me by surprise was how intense the work would be. due to covid and lockdowns, i graduated from my high school nearly two months early. this meant that i had a much longer summer and hence a long period of time away from work. when i began my studies here at notre dame, it was a reality check. in the beginning, i struggled with the sheer amount of work that i was being given, and i questioned whether i was even was capable of keeping up with the work here at notre dame. everyone around me seemed to be dealing with the transition very well. this imposter syndrome i experienced was summarised pretty eloquently in this quote from elizabeth cox from week 9 1., ‘people who are highly skilled or accomplished, tend to believe that others are more highly skilled than them, and they therefore do not deserve the same accolades or achievements’. this was exactly how i felt, however i realised that i needed to make a change if i wanted to succeed here at notre dame, and that i was accomplished enough to do so. i then began to become more strategic with the way i worked and set out a plan of how i would plan each day in order to be as productive as possible. i recognised the things that would prohibit me from being productive and found ways that i could combat them. since working with this plan, i have begun to become more productive throughout my day, and grades in my classes have got a lot better. through some reflection and strategising, i found an effective and efficient way to study and maximise my grades. this has in turn allowed me to be more comfortable day by day, as i have less stress and work on my shoulders. in conclusion, my time here at notre dame so far has been a beautiful whirlwind that i would not change for the world. although there have been some tough times, i have already met some of the most fantastic people i have ever met, and i am unbelievably ecstatic to continue my four years here at this amazing university. 12/3 integration 2 essay kian o’connor moreau fye december 3, 2021 a second wind coming to notre dame, i knew that my college experience would differ substantially from my high school one. the increased presence of religion, higher academic rigor, and the new beginning away from my home and friends combined with having to forge new interpersonal connections on campus has culminated in a novel experience that changed my perception of certain ideas. throughout these past months, in and outside of moreau, i’ve been prompted to ask myself important questions regarding my values, relationships, and priorities that will shape my future at notre dame and the rest of my life. when i first arrived at nd, i believed that grades should be prioritized above all else. despite being warned that “not everyone can be valedictorian here the way they were in high school”, i remained steadfast in the belief that maintaining a high gpa would distinguish me from my peers and land me better internship opportunities and ultimately a job. while i do still hold this belief and strive to get the best grades possible, i’ve realized that i took this mentality to the extreme at the cost of my mental health and my relationships. with my tunnel vision focused on grades, i neglected reaching out and making new friends. i skipped dorm activities to study and stayed in finishing homework while other people went out. i underestimated what it took to make new friends and thought that i could balance school and friends the same way i did in high school, neglecting the fact that my relationships in high school were forged over years. ultimately, i came to realize that “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergen moreau fye week 9). from now on, i plan to balance my studies with interpersonal relationships by making a more active effort to talk to the people around me through attending more dorm activities like mass and hall government https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html meetings while also being more open in my classes. if done correctly, i’ll be able to grow socially while still working hard towards my academic goals. my time at notre dame has also made me reevaluate my career goals. initially, financial stability was the driving force behind my career goals. i wanted money when i graduated so that my family and i could live comfortably while enjoying more of what life has to offer. however, there was always a voice in the back of my mind urging me to do something more. i realized that i was lacking conviction, something that “is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertiathe prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by rev. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). i realized that i wanted to combine a career in finance with my goal of facilitating the globe’s transition to clean energy sources. i quickly realized that this was a very feasible career path after seeing opportunities from the wall street club with firms like marathon capital, an investment bank that specializes in investing in renewable energy. i’ve also joined unleashed social ventures, a business club on campus that collaborates with firms to create monetary and societal benefit. going forward, i plan to minor in energy studies in addition to majoring in finance and international economics to give myself the breadth of knowledge necessary to pursue my new career path. i plan to apply to lead an unleashed project in upcoming semesters and continue to scout and pursue opportunities that combine finance with renewable energy. notre dame has also forced me to combat some of my more deep-rooted, implicit biases. in high school, i witnessed first hand how racism can plague communities. my high school made national headlines for multiple instances of racism and i lived a mere 30 minutes from where george floyd was killed. admittedly, i liked to believe that i was more of an activist than i actually was. despite saying that i supported the cause against institutionalized racism, i did very little to actually try to change it. here at notre dame, i was forced to come to terms with my performative activism and my implicit biases when i found myself being slightly envious at certain diversity initiatives that i couldn’t be a part of. i failed to recognize that “[racial https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ differences] are due to social, historical, political, economic and experiential contexts” (“diversity matters! by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). rather than being jealous, i should have recognized my privilege. in the future, i plan to use my notre dame education to help those less fortunate than myself by volunteering at the lab of economic opportunities, where i’ll assist non-profits to make them more effective at accomplishing their goals. i’ll also strive to be more introspective and recognize my implicit biases when they influence my decisions to limit their impact. lastly, notre dame’s unique standing as a highly regarded academic and religious institution has led me to question my stance on religion. it was inevitable that a school that mandates that its students take theology courses would cause me to reevaluate my stance on religion. entering the school, i was a catholic moreso in deed than belief. i went through the sacraments and occasionally went to church, but i couldn’t honestly say that i believe in god. right now, that still mostly remains the case. however, theology taught me that my doubt indicates that i care enough about my religion to think it through rather than blindly following it, which was comforting to hear. additionally, i’ve come to better understand the theological reasoning for why god gave us free will. god wants “the creature to stand up on its own legsto carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish” (“‘the screwtape letters’ chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). i’m glad that regardless of what i end up believing, i was gifted the opportunity to choose for myself. i hope that my good deeds are motivated by me as opposed to a desire to get into heaven and that my morals remain strong regardless of my religion. on another note, seeing respected academic figures, like my rector fr. bill, devoting their lives to god has prompted me to further examine religious texts and beliefs. in the future, i hope to further my journey with religion by more consistently attending mass and taking my theology and philosophy classes as seriously as i would a course that’s in my major. ultimately, this semester has been one filled with many changes. changes that have altered my views and changed the way i perceive the world and my place in it. i’m thankful that i https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/files/188887?module_item_id=105691 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/files/188887?module_item_id=105691 had my moreau class to help guide me through this turbulent time and i’m comforted that i’m not alone. i look forward to applying the lessons i learned this semester in the next one, and i know that when i struggle going forward, reflecting on the lessons that i’ve learned this semester will provide me with a second wind to face the day. fys integration one assignment: what do i believe? fys 10101-83 fall 2021 october 15, 2021 integration one assignment: what do i believe? my truths i believe that i am an independent, strong-willed individual. this statement is not something i have always been able to tell myself. however, especially over the course of the past semester, i see immense development in myself, due to the experiences that came with moving from home and attending the university of notre dame. although this experience has brought many challenges, i know that i have grown more firm in my own thoughts and positions on all aspects of life, including the aspects of the following “i believe” statements.” i believe that i control the fruitfulness of my environment. one prominent aspect of moving from home and attending notre dame is the change from seeing people i have known my entire life everyday, to being surrounded by strangers. trying to be vulnerable with people i was unfamiliar with was a definite challenge for the first few weeks of school. however, dr. brown says, “they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful. they didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor did they talk about vulnerability being excruciating … they just talked about it being necessary.” (“the power of vulnerability” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wb m-kd0&index=4 by brené brown moreau fye week one) through this quote, i learned that the need for vulnerability outweighs the both positive and negative possible outcomes, and gaining the courage to do so leads to personal growth. one reason being vulnerable with new people was difficult at first, was due to the overwhelming amount of people i met daily and the unknown intentions that those people had in our potential relationships. in “because i love you whiskey,” by the one love foundation as part of the #thatsnotlove campaign, the dialogue says, “because i love you, i storm out at the bar and leave you all by yourself.” (“because i love you” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g&t=1s by one love foundation moreau fye week four) the video serves as an important reminder to look out for the signs of a toxic relationship and reevaluate the life-giving aspects of the relationships they share. therefore, with this video in mind, especially during a time like welcome weekend, i have been able to consciously filter through who i want to surround myself with, to create a good and fruitful atmosphere for myself. i believe everyone has something to say. another major adjustment i encountered over the first few weeks of class was the change in classroom setting. larger auditoriums, filled with groups of people who consistently clung to each other made it difficult to get to know everyone and understand the various perspectives swe all had over the same subjects. in the tedtalk entitled “the danger of a single story,” chimamanda ngozi adichie says, “all of these stories make me who i am. but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me.” (“the danger of a single story” https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/hashtag/thatsnotlove https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g&t=1s https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-1123735 #t-1123735 by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) this quote highlights the need for open mindedness and conversations about differences is very important to a society that is more inclusive and understanding of each other. keeping this lesson in mind as i have been exposed to so many races, cultures, backgrounds, and stories throughout my time here, i am grateful to know that these conversations do take place and everyone has an equally important perspective to share. i believe that individual experiences and reactions to those experiences are significant to the identity of a person. coming from a small island with a small range of perspective and experiences, i was very conscious of the differences between my peers and i. in my “where i’m from poem,” i wrote, “i am from church bells and school uniforms, from good grades, school clubs, and bus 1-4-6.” (“where i’m from poem” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4 /edit?usp=sharing by moreau fye week six) these are phrases that i connect to because they are significant parts of my life. they are part of what makes me who i am and what has shaped my perspective on things. this encompasses one struggle i have faced recently, identifying with my past while encountering a new environment. i did not know how to respond to all of the new information and experiences i was being exposed to. however, in the video entitled “the role of faith in our story,” father pete mccormick says, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding, to the best of our ability, as the person you know yourself to be, the person that god has created you to be.” (“the role of faith in our story” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=439s by father pete mccormick moreau fye week three) through the quote, i learned that i would not be authentically responding to my faith at notre dame if i were to neglect my previous experiences. instead, i should integrate my previous experiences and current perspectives into my everyday life, to gain a more complete understanding and identification with myself. i believe that everyone defines their own distinct purpose in life. as i encountered different people with various passions and goals, i struggled with identifying my own goals and the validity of my accomplishments compared to others. in “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brookes, the speaker describes one way of life as something “that turns you into a shrewd animal, that treats life like a game who slips into a sort of mediocrity where you realize there's a difference between your desired self and your actual self. you're not earning the sort of eulogy you want, you hope someone will give it to you … nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime, therefore we must be saved by hope.”(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=1s by david brookes moreau fye week two) the speaker described a good resume as an impressive and good thing to achieve. however, a good eulogy, defined by the strong connections with people made over time, is also very important. i think that personal relationships are not comparable to the relationship a person has with their work, as that relationship could also be rooted in passion and dedication. when talking about the members of the holy cross in the video “two notre dames: your holy cross education,” father kevin grove says, “and what i love about them is that they would never brag about us. our lives are not our resumes. it's just being who they are as holy cross, letting faith https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-1123735 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4/edit?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=439s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=1s and reason, both in their fullness, be applied to every part of life.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1 -d0a45c429187 moreau fye week five) the quote that highlights a life that instead focuses on meaningful experiences is significant to understanding how stories shape one's journey. i learned that prioritizing a way of going about life while also working towards those goals is how one can make everyday stories significant. i also learned that every goal and accomplishment is valid and contributes to a person’s authentic self. therefore, i can live both with the intention of creating significant relationships with others and accomplishing personal and academic goals. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0freferences “the power of vulnerability” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wb m-kd0&index=4 by brené brown moreau fye week one “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=1s by david brookes moreau fye week two “the role of faith in our story” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=439s by father pete mccormick moreau fye week three “because i love you” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g&t=1s by one love foundation moreau fye week four “two notre dames: your holy cross education” https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1 -d0a45c429187 moreau fye week five “where i’m from poem” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4 /edit?usp=sharing by moreau fye week six “the danger of a single story” https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript #t-1123735 by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&t=439s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g&t=1s https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0fhttps://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ewz8fvk0itwzudi7ekouqn0df3n97oignl409v9dvp4/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-1123735 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript#t-1123735 moreau integration professor pruitt moreau integration 1 october 15, 2021 at my core i believe that my community should be accepting and inclusive towards everyone. growing up, my parents always told me to treat others the way you want to be treated. this was a phrase that resonated with me, as i would want others to accept me for who i am. in week one, we talked about authenticity and vulnerability. brene brown emphasized the importance of authenticity by saying, “they had connection, and this was the hard part, as a result of authenticity. they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). in order to form connections with those around us, we must be our most authentic selves, which requires vulnerability, especially when meeting new people. however, in order to feel comfortable being authentic and vulnerable, it is imperative that we are in an accepting, inclusive environment. everyone has different stories, as is demonstrated in week 5, and with our different stories, we can foster a very diverse community. diversity is beneficial to everyone, as we broaden our horizons by hearing the variety of different stories and cultures that other people experience. for example, we can learn through the stories and hardships of others, as is demonstrated when carla harris said “i have learned that the way to grow your power is indeed to give it away” “"notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address" moreau fye week 5). as an african american woman who worked on wall street, carla harris has plenty of stories of hardship, struggle, and perseverance that she can tell the world. for her, through telling her stories, she gains “power” because she is impacting the lives of others. in order to embrace the stories of others, like carla harris, we must have an inclusive and accepting environment. one thing that impedes our ability to live in an accepting, inclusive society is implicit biases. implicit biases are, unfortunately, something that we all have, and something that many people are unaware of. though people with implicit biases typically don’t have malicious intentions, implicit biases do prevent our society from reaching true inclusivity, as implicit biases tend to discriminate against certain minority groups. as was discussed in class, in the future we must target implicit biases at the source and eliminate them through early education. chimamanda adichie said “what this demonstrates, i think, is how impressionable and vulnerable we are in the face of a story, particularly as children” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichiemoreau fye week 7). this quote demonstrates how it is imperative that we teach children about inclusivity and acceptance while they’re young, since they are still impressionable. if we do that, our society and community will be more welcoming and supportive overall. community is one of notre dame’s most notable qualities, and the community is becoming increasingly more inclusive as notre dame becomes more diverse. this is a big step in the right direction, and i believe that we should continue to make our community more accepting and more inclusive. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&ab_channel=universityofnotredame https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story i believe that i am responsible for helping others. i was born into a very privileged family and have been super blessed with a pretty easy life. in my week 6 “where i’m from” poem, i wrote about how i’m from a very privileged town, which has definitely impacted my view on the world. i’ve never been concerned about finances, family issues, or many other issues faced by the majority of the world. however, at times i forget that i grew up in a bubble, shielding me from the reality faced by most people in the world. as father pete said “let us never forget that we live in a world that is hungry, thirsty, without shelter, ill and imprisoned” ("the role of faith in our story" moreau fye week 3). for those of us who have been fortunate, i believe that we have an obligation to help those in need. growing up, my dad always told me “to whom much is given, much is expected”. i have been given a lot, so i think the least that i can do is help others. additionally, the catholic values have exemplified the need to do service. in catholicism, service is a very important value, so it has been a priority in my life growing up. all throughout high school, i did various volunteer activities, which i really enjoyed. it was very fulfilling and rewarding to see that you’re making an impact on someone else’s life by helping them. i believe that i foster life giving relationships by surrounding myself with uplifting and supporting people. at home, my closest friends are my friends from elementary school and even younger than that. coming to school, i was nervous about making new, close friends because i hadn’t had to make new best friends in years. i haven’t thought about the characteristics of good friendships before coming here, because i already had my good friendships. this idea is solidified by david brooks when he said “the eulogy virtues are the ones that get mentioned in the eulogy, which are deeper: who are you, in your depth, what is the nature of your relationships, are you bold, loving, dependable, consistent? and most of us, including me, would say that the eulogy virtues are the most important virtues. but at least in my case, are they the ones that i think about the most? and the answer is no” (should you live for your resume... or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week 2). though i hadn’t put much thought into character traits prior to college, since coming here i’ve had to think about it a lot more. when making friends here, i try to surround myself with people who will help me become a better person, and i’ll do the same for them. this is reinforced in one of the articles that says “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" moreau fye week 4). by being uplifting and supporting, my friends are helping me to become my best self. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/modules/items/107200 intregation 1 moreau first year course integration one throughout my 7 weeks in notre dame i have found that my root beliefs are what shape my choices and priorities. and throughout the 7 weeks of the moreau course i have found that these thoughts and beliefs are what make me unique. my family and religion are some aspects that shape my choices and beliefs. one of my root beliefs for example, week 1 (searching for belonging), is my future. and a statement from dr. brown that really portrayed my future was, “connection is why we are here. it’s what gives purpose and meaning to our lives.”( 3:133:16 min.) i believe that the future that lies for me is one of greatness and success, not only career-wise but also community-wise. i want to be able to use my major (urban design architecture) to help others, especially my latino community. hence, why i am participating and practicing in my graphics 1 inorder to ensure greatness for me and others . i want to be able to expand my philanthropy to a national or even global level. i strongly feel that my purpose/ meaning in life is to help and serve others by connecting with not only my community but also my world. try to fix what has been damaged in order for our future generations not to struggle, yet expand the greatness we will leave behind. this is our purpose to connect and communicate with others in order for peace in the world tomorrow. another root belief, week 2 (searching for self-knowledge), are my strengths and weaknesses. a statement from mr. david brooks states in his ted talk that, “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths and adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses.” (3:31-3:38) ]mr. brooks states that adam one's success is built by one’s strengths. for me it would be mathematics, because it's one of my strengths and that correlates back to my test scores and my major which is architecture which requires math and physics. however, i am successful only with my strength’s. however, one of my weaknesses (adam 2) stated by the via character strengths survey is honesty. and i agree with this because i have always lied about my true identity and originality because i wanted to fit in with society in both school and nation. i lied because i wanted to fit in with society. week 3 (searching for a framework) was about faith. a statement from professor fagerberg states, “faith, hope, and love adjust the lighting of our life so that we look beyond ourselves to see god” and “willingness to shed the comforts of the world and above all else to love those who are in most need.” (fr. pete) faith is a tool used to help and guide others towards sanity and service by interacting with those in need and assisting them. prof. fagerberg stated in his text that “faith, hope and love are what brings us towards god.” we use these characteristics by helping others as stated by fr. pete in his video stated, “ ...above all else to love those who are in most need.” however, we must have faith in ourselves and god to withstand the critics of the world because only then will we be able to help others and also ourselves. my 4th root belief (searching for life-giving relationships) is consent. what i took from the video was “your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them.” and “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting.” what i took was that one must never be forced or force one to do anything they are unwilling or unconscious to do. the statement from the article, “your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them.”, made a personal connection with me in highschool. i had a group of friends who let's say we're not the best influence on my future nor health. they were the friends that skipped class, drank alcohol, revolted against their parents, fought many times, and overall were very bad friends. they didnt into account what either i said or did because they thought it was foolish. the statement, “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting.” really sought me because it connected back to those memories. week 5 (identifying narratives) was about time. carla harris states in her speech that, “time is the most important asset.” it is the finite aspect of time that makes it so valuable; money may be earned, but time can never be earned again. everyone has the same 24 hours in a day, and it is up to us to either use them to advance society and act as a force for good by "creating our tales," or to waste them. week 6 ("where i'm from") was special to me because i got to express and ponder on where i am from in a poem. my poem starts by stating, “i am from duvalin to tamarindos” these are basically mexican candies that as a child you would savour and enjoy these treats. “i am from a barrio in a city that is gorgeous” barrio is basically a neighborhood in gangster slang. “i am from corridos to the best himno nacional” corridos are music that is commonly heard in mexico and our national anthem is for me the best out there. “i am from the mexican farms” this is just to describe the terrain and homes in mexico where many have farms/ranchos. “i am from a single mom because my dad left me when i was born” this to show that i was raised and taught by my mother and that i grew up with no father figure as a child. however i see these lines as memories that made me become the person i am today. and finally week 7 (identifying perspectives), was about truth. in the text: “how to think about ‘implicit bias’” it states that, “for example, metro areas with greater average implicit bias have larger racial disparities in police shootings. and counties with greater average implicit bias have larger racial disparities in infant health problems.” what i drew from this text was that the truth is often misguided and lost with conscious or unconscious biases. sometimes we think or believe that the truth we seek or say is often correct but we may be very wrong. we may believe that 1+1=3 and may even enforce our answer to others, however we know that it's wrong. 1+1=2. overall, these past 7 weeks have really helped me understand the true meaning of being a notre dame student and being a human on this earth. i have found my true identity and that is to help others in their need inorder for a safer tomorrow. integration two mcclintock 1 finn mcclintock mr. retartha moreau fye 3 december 2021 finding and developing different ideas during my first semester at notre dame and in the moreau first year experience, i have encountered new ideas from my peers around me and my new living situation away from my family. among the ideas that we have discussed are struggling with imposter syndrome, differing political thoughts, and varying views of community and religion. living with people different from myself, especially being away from family, has given me an opportunity to develop my own opinions on these topics. one topic that we have discussed, especially as a group of semi-notre dame students, is imposter syndrome. imposter syndrome is certainly something that i have felt in recent years. being denied from notre dame but accepted into gateway is an easy source of uneasiness to point to. while we gateways may graduate with the same nd ‘25 in our bios, the different route can make us feel like imposters in the room, even as we achieve the same successes. the video mentioned that “there’s often no threshold of accomplishment that puts these feelings to rest,” and that even people like thomas edison felt inadequate (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). so, i am sure that not only gateways but other notre dame students, even those on track to graduate with fancy latin distinctions, experience these feelings. while imposter syndrome is a very real challenge, it is possible to control what expectations we hold in our minds for ourselves. applying to colleges, i had the expectation that i would get accepted to notre dame in december and relax for the https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo mcclintock 2 remaining months of school. failing to reach that expectation was devastating, even as i received good news from other institutions. too often, i find myself holding a single great expectation, and i can put blinders on that, covering other successes in my life. while my fellow gateways and i may share the quality of imposter syndrome, we differ greatly on a variety of opinions. political disagreement is the most obvious disagreement to point out in society, and is something i have experienced at notre dame. talking with other students with less progressive views than i hold, i found myself getting upset. i have realized that i do not have much skill in dealing with differing opinions. in father jenkins’ wesley theological seminary commencement, he noted that “at a time of expanding diversity of people and moral opinions — when we need more skill and wisdom in engaging those with other views — we seem to be less skillful, less wise” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). the past decade or two of politics has been revealing in the division of opinion in our country. to our credit, i do not think that americans are truly super divided—many people on both sides would find their moral opinions to be quite similar. however, as fr. jenkins said, we lack the skill and wisdom necessary to deal with the differences that do exist in our opinions. one specific issue that seems to be perennially divisive is race and related issues like critical race theory. i attended a presentation at notre dame by gloria purvis titled “racial justice: solidarity and the church’s call to action.” from a religious perspective, purvis pointed out that god created one human family in his image. thus, all of humanity is related through this common bond, and should want each other to flourish. however, laws and practices in the united states from its creation until today have given a “royal status” to white people over other races, contrary to god’s wishes. while those who attended the lecture were receptive to and in https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ mcclintock 3 agreement with purvis, i am sure that some of my peers at nd are in opposition to her claims. personally, i see critical race theory as an important step in recognizing that our society is not and has not been an equal platform for all people, and a necessary measure in taking steps to create more equality. however, some of my classmates may point to catholic social teaching and teachings like “love thy neighbor as thyself” as less controversial and a better step in addressing inequality. these differing opinions, though arguments can be frustrating, are a pivotal part of the college experience with students from around the country and world. in his talk "diversity matters," professor agustin fuentes concluded that two disagreeing students “had learned something from each other, shared something. that’s important, that’s what college is supposed to be about” (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). i wholeheartedly agree that experiencing new identities, viewpoints, and culture is a valuable part of college. in prof. fuentes’ talk, he showed how american cities are heavily segregated, which can prevent people from having meaningful interactions with people of different backgrounds. my hometown is 85% white, and it is clearly noticeable when i go shopping or relax at the beach. while this underrepresentation of minorities is not a result of any malicious action, it can have damaging results: the lack of sharing new identities and ideas. so, it is important to view college as a chance to be open to different people and gain new experiences and practices. in my time at notre dame so far, i have definitely encountered a community much more diverse than mine at home, and it has been a gainful opportunity to learn from others. one area that i have taken the opportunity to learn more about from people around me at notre dame is religion. as a non-religious individual in one of the most catholic schools in the country, it is an obvious chance for me to expand my knowledge. in my theology class, i have https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 mcclintock 4 learned a lot from my peers that have spent their lives attending church and catholic school. even in moreau, i have learned about certain religious ideas like hope. in one satirical source, the screwtape letters quips “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s (god’s) will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i think that this situation, while seen from a satirical perspective on religious christians, offers a great perspective on hope. from the point of view of someone without hope, a hopeful person appears like the human of this story: unable to see any reason to believe in something, but obeying it nonetheless. in some more grounded experiences here at notre dame, football fans have hope in the team to reach the playoff even when chances appear bleak and some of my fellow gateways are still hopeful for housing despite only bad news being given. in this semester at notre dame, i have experienced a lot and taken away beliefs of myself and others. encountering differing ideas and perspectives has been a valuable experience that is sure to continue in the next seven semesters at notre dame. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/files/189595?module_item_id=106352 moreau integration moreau integration the beliefs we have have a big affect on how we perceive things and act upon them. these beliefs are always changing in proportionality with the part of our journey. coming to notre dame has made me realize the beliefs that i stick onto to narrate my experience here. i was able to do this after getting to meet new people, studying in a new system, and learning lessons from different courses. in moreau, we got to talk about some aspects that define us as social people and how these aspects affect our journey. some of the most important things i believe in are growth through faith and narration, the search for relationship and the self, and lastly finding truth by vulnerability and the elimination of a single story. i believe that i grow by relating to a narrative in my new journey and combining this story with faith. i think that everyone always has some kind of narrative that makes them unique. this narrative defines who they are and guides them in their way. we have seen this in (“where i’m from” by georrge ella lyon -moreau fye week 6), and during the first week of college, where everyone got to realize that every one of us comes from a different and special background. i also believe that faith also plays a role with that specific narrative in affecting our experiences. i have always held this root belief in my life. i wanted to focus on it when i came to the university. although, it was a bit challenging for me at first. it was hard to start a new beginning and start building up a new narrative. it was also a different experience for me to be in a catholic school, where most of the students here are catholic or of different religion. this new environment challenged me to write my journey in different colors, and grow through the faith and beliefs that i always have while writing a new chapter. these two aspects were seen both in two weeks of moreau where we talked about how everyone will have a different narrative that will shape their journey. this is affected by the belief of notre dame to create a conclusive community that holds onto faith and the love of god that result from self love and the love of others. this is seen in (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. -moreau fye week 3), and in week 5 where a quote that stuck in my head “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. -moreau fye week 5), which shows that every challenge and failure in our journey is a blessing and a step towards growth. lastly, growth is related to our narratives and faith combined together. i believe that i am searching for my authentic self and true friendships. this is a new stage in my life, and it is time to focus on my new goals and make new friends. relationships are a fundamental part of our life, and it is important to know how to be healthy ones. i believe that when i get to know myself more and realize the authentic part of me, i will be able to create healthier relationships. during the first weeks in college i was trying to adapt to the new system and the different things here. i have met a lot of people from different backgrounds. i was aiming to have my first weeks more to discover rather than creating these long lasting relationships. i wanted to focus more on myself and be true to myself so that i won’t get overwhelmed. “in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” is a quote from (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks, ted -moreau fye week 2). this quote stuck in my head because i saw myself relating to it in a way. i didn't lose myself but i did feel lost the first month in notre dame, and i realized that i have to change into a better version of me here. i also believe that searching for healthy relationships takes time, and we have to understand first the toxic one from the healthy ones, which is shown in (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation -moreau fye week 4). lastly, in order to find these healthy relationships we have to find your authentic selves first. i believe that i pursue truth by being vulnerable and getting away from the judgement of a single story. i realized that we share a need for spiritual awakening. i believe that one of the first steps to vulnerability is to be grateful and thankful as it was said in (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown, tedxhouston -moreau fye week 1). sometimes we tend to forget the little things in life, it’s those things that matter the most. i always hold a big importance for the small things. the small things that our dorms provide us, our ra, our rector, our professors, and our classmates make the experience in notre dame a wholesome. everyone here is so nice and welcoming. everyone wants to help you and provide the best for you. i realized this month how fortunate i am to be here. i also believe that to find truth in my journey, i should pay attention and look into the different perspectives of a situation. this is what the quote “it is impossible to engage properly with a place or person without engaging with all the stories of that place and that person” elaborates on from (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted -moreau fye week 7). when we take all of the sides in perspective, we start to recognize the truth and the root behind every story. finally, we are able to pursue truth by choosing vulnerability and avoiding the single story. in conclusion, these are some of the beliefs that i encountered during my first weeks in notre dame. i had some experiences that portrayed these beliefs and challenged me to think more about them. i am looking forward to what the next steps in this journey will lead me to. i would like to build new beliefs and deepen my older ones. i believe that finding the growth, searching for myself, and pursuing truth have more levels and challenges, but through the beliefs and faith i can manage to learn more about what awaits. sorry... google sorry... we're sorry... ... but your computer or network may be sending automated queries. to protect our users, we can't process your request right now. see google help for more information. google home integration one-neligan 1 mr. espeseth moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 examining my root beliefs’ role in my journey toward the building of character i believe that i will find a deeper sense of belonging by being vulnerable with others—both by sharing what i am struggling with and being open to listen to what they are struggling with. i find that i am only able to do this when embracing my emotions for what they are. dr. brené brown explains, “you cannot selectively numb. so when you numb those [hard feelings], we numb joy; we numb gratitude; we numb happiness” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). dr. brown’s speech conveyed that a person must either fully embrace their emotions or not embrace them at all. she explicates that in attempting to selectively numb our emotions, we inhibit the full experience and expression of our other emotions. in attempting to find belonging, i know that i need to continue to follow dr. brown’s advice. rather than trying to suppress emotions, i need to not only embrace them myself but feel comfortable sharing them with others. this has been particularly difficult at the start of college because it is hard to be vulnerable with people that you have only known for a few weeks. for example, i have been challenged in trying to be vulnerable talking to new people or sharing personal experiences in class discussions. however, i think that by following dr. brown’s advice and eliminating any emotional inhibitions i might have, i will find a greater sense of belonging. i believe that i can grow as my most authentic self by putting less pressure on myself to fulfill a certain superficial idea of success and focusing on strengthening my character. i believe that i can best develop my character by addressing my potentially self-inhibiting habits and https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l0ifum1dykg&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=1 neligan 2 tendencies. in his ted talk, david brooks explains that in order to fight your weaknesses, you must “find the sin which you've committed over and again through your life, your signature sin out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). brooks indicates that in order to eliminate our weaknesses, or “signature sins,” we must deeply self-reflect and begin to tackle our biggest underlying struggle. i believe that through identifying my most deep-rooted weaknesses—potentially envy or self-criticism—and addressing them, i will be able to further develop my character and live a more fulfilling life. i think that strengthening my character will allow me to live a more successful life, by both the adam i and adam ii metrics. for example, i think that having stronger character will help me to more effectively pursue my career goals—maybe to ace an interview or gain better connections—and also to make new friends and impact my community. in college, i have definitely felt some pressure to focus on academics and building my resume at the expense of personal and social development. however, after more intentional self-reflection and chipping away at the weakest parts of my character, i think that i will be able to live as my most authentic self. i believe that i am searching for more faith in others and in the world as a whole. as someone who is often pessimistic, i sometimes find myself lacking faith in those around me. i have a tendency to not rely on others and only have faith in myself and my capabilities. however, this can become exhausting and burdensome. i think that in following fr. pete’s advice on how to “untie a knot,” i will be able to find faith in the world around me. fr. pete advises, “each knot is unique. when attempting to remove the knot, do not operate under the false belief that what you did before will work this time around” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry neligan 3 pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). fr. pete explains that everyone’s relationship or struggle with faith is different and ever-changing. the metaphor of untying a knot for our struggles with faith made me more optimistic about approaching my own search for faith. the metaphor simplified the daunting task and allowed me to establish a mindset of patience, open-mindedness, and hopefulness. i think that through following fr. pete’s instructions, i will be able to gain confidence in what is around me and strengthen my relationship with faith. over the past year, my life circumstances have changed drastically—particularly in coming to notre dame. my amount of faith in every person, place, and thing seems to be different and constantly changing. however, approaching every challenge as a new knot to be untied, i think that i will be able to improve my relationship with faith and view the world through a more optimistic lens. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by following my intuition and looking for people who have strong character and sense of identity. i find that by acknowledging off-putting behavior, or “red flags,” early on, i am able to identify who might not be a good friend. olivia taylor of grotto warns that “sometimes the seemingly minor plan cancellations can lead to major disappointments in your friendship...if you don’t trust them to physically show up when they said they would, it logically follows that you don’t trust them to be there for the bigger things in your life” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). taylor’s example demonstrates that it is important to look for signs early on that might indicate someone’s reliability or strength of character. i think that i recognize these types of signs pretty quickly and do not tolerate inconsiderate behavior. however, i do think that, for example, once i am friends with someone and develop a connection with them, it is easy to begin to excuse their behavior. in order to forge more life-giving relationships, i think i need to continue to follow my intuition and recognize signs of poor character early on. rather than https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ neligan 4 making excuses for the friend, i will hold them more accountable and ask them about the problem at hand. through confronting these smaller disputes early on, i will be able to prevent larger, more serious disputes in the future. this mindset has been particularly useful in coming to college and trying to make new friends. by staying true to my own beliefs about forging life-giving relationships, i know that i can be successful in surrounding myself with people who will encourage me to be my most authentic self. i believe that my purpose is to better society and the lives of the people around me in whatever way i can. as someone who finds giving to others very fulfilling, i know that it is part of my purpose to continue to contribute to my community. i think that my purpose very much aligns with the goals and methods that the founders of notre dame intended for the university. fr. grove recounts, “they were to reinvigorate and renew society, not by siding with either blind faith or blind reason...he founded holy cross to remind the world that the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest, when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). i agree with the premise that fulfilling our life purpose requires both faith and reason. i think that by finding faith in society and certain causes and learning how to best further those causes through my academic and intellectual pursuits, i will be able to pursue my mission of creating a positive social impact in the world. over the next four years, i hope to find the motivation to pursue my goals from faith and acquire the tools to do so from my classes, professors, mentors, peers, and activities. i believe that i grow by trying new things. in writing my “where i’m from” poem, i found myself referencing activities or hobbies that were particularly formative in my childhood. although i later quit some of these hobbies, i found that the act of persevering and trying new https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 neligan 5 things strengthened my character more than any one activity. in explaining how to write the “where i’m from” poem, george ella lyon suggested, “music could take you to a scene where the music is playing; could provide you the chance to interleave the words of the song and words you might have said (or a narrative of what you were thinking and feeling at the time the song was first important to you)” (“where i'm from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). this inspired me to reference the songs i learned when i played violin. my time playing violin was particularly relevant in where i’m from because it taught me how to be disciplined and hardworking in whatever i choose to pursue. the reference takes the poem back to a time in my life when i was excited to try and wholeheartedly embrace anything new. through throwing myself into new activities, i continued to go out of my comfort zone and achieve things that i did not think were possible. for example, even though i am more shy and introverted, i joined my school’s debate team and learned to be more comfortable with public speaking. although i no longer participate in this activity, the public speaking skills and the determination that i developed have remained with me. when i am comfortable, i am not growing. by exposing myself to new things and continuously redefining my comfort zone, i will grow into the best version of myself. i believe that i pursue truth by remaining open-minded and constantly searching for new perspectives to understand. i have always found the concept of stereotypes to be unfair, and i always try to look past them and question their origin. my beliefs align very much with adichie’s. as she explains in her ted talk, “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). i agree that in buying into stereotypes—intentionally or http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story neligan 6 unintentionally—we perpetuate single stories and strip people of what makes them individuals. i have found truth in the past by looking beyond what might be seen on the surface, asking questions, and remaining open-minded about what i might learn. i think that by intentionally making sure that i never hear a single story, but rather multiple perspectives on an issue, i will gain a better understanding of the truth. for example, in meeting new people in college, i have tried to never make assumptions about a person based on their appearance, where they are from, what they are studying, etc. in intentionally remaining open-minded, i have learned more about the people around me and fully embraced our similarities and differences. what makes us similar and different—what makes us human—seems to be the most important truth of all. anderson moreau integration two hghm anderson 1 dr. chan moreau fye 12/3/21 “strength rejoices in the challenge”: testing my values in a new environment below are some of the things i have encountered during my journey here at the university of notre dame. 1) i have solidified my belief that community is essential. one must have good peers but also good mentors. i thought palmer's article on community was very interesting (moreau fye experience week eleven). i had never heard the term community defined in such a way before. i thought he touched on several interesting ideas: the need for leadership yet the problem with leaders, the importance of patience, the merit of suffering, the realization that community cannot be a paradise, the dangers of having an aversion to weakness, and the idea that you cannot be intimate with everyone. i particularly found the idea that community is a gift as opposed to a human product interesting. we so often try to control the community or create programs that will enhance the community of an organization. i just thought this was an interesting point that relationships and human community are a gift that has been given to us as opposed to something we created and can thus control and redefine. there is a tendency to believe that college is the time to depart from rules and tradition and go your own way. while there is truth to the idea that you need to take charge of your life, i believe it is not right to rebel against tradition. in fact, i think experience, formation, advice, and hghm anderson 2 faith are all extremely necessary pillars to succeed in college and in life. they provide direction so that one can better avoid disaster and seek the good. thus, i believe a strong community is one in which you can find both peers and mentors. i have found such a community at the notre dame de nicola center for ethics and culture. 1) i have been affirmed in my belief that true education cultivates the mind and heart. education is more than schooling, it is the cultivation of another’s soul the final unit of moreau fye was my favorite unit we covered this year. i thought both of the texts were very enriching. i enjoyed learning more about moreau’s life through “hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. (moureau fye week twelve). i loved his definition that education is the art of helping young people to completeness. education is meant to be enriching and focused on the genuine good and fulfillment of the learner. i thought it was interesting when the article said that moreau could have been a prominent theologian if he had devoted himself more to scholarship, but instead he devoted himself towards being a teacher and evangelizing through education. i found this interesting because it reveals that sometimes one's vocation is to choose something that is not as prestigious per se but equally valuable. the church of course needs good theologians, but it also needs good teachers. this reinforces the fact that not everyone is called to the same mission and that many different vocations can be equally fulfilling. they are all necessary. this gives hope because we are each called to a different purpose but our combined vocations together can truly impact the world for the good. we only need to choose to use our gifts and talents as god intended. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104241 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104241 hghm anderson 3 2) i have learned that reducing people to “victims” does not do justice to their humanity. we can learn from failure and we can overcome suffering. in his article on “should catholic schools teach critical race theory,” devron states, “it can guide school leaders to resist overly zealous efforts to expunge from syllabi novels such as to kill a mockingbird because they use offensive language, rather than understanding the higher value of the universal theme and moral lesson that this literature teaches. such efforts to remove or censor this literature ignore and even insult the capacity of students to recognize the good, the true and the beautiful in cultures, identities and social backgrounds different from their own” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j., america magazinemoreau fye week ten). i think this is an interesting point. it reminds me of the victimhood unit that we did earlier in the year which explored how reducing people to a single story one of oppression, reduces their humanity, dignity, and depth. humans have the capacity to overcome great evil and suffering. hence, they also have the capacity and gift to recognize good and evil in specific contexts. that is part of the beauty of literature. you can witness the strengths and faults of characters, the good and bad parts of human nature, great suffering and great heroism all from the pages of a book. it is part of the gift of our mind to be able to sift through experiences and information and be able to filter the good from the bad. this ability to filtrate illuminates that one truly has internalized the truths about human nature and morality. it reveals a depth of the mind and heart. i have personally found literature to be the most beneficial subject in teaching me about myself, the world, and what goodness should look like. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104215 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104215 hghm anderson 4 3) i have learned that perfection is not a standard one should live by. however, i believe one should still have standards. i strongly believe that our work is valuable not for what awards it can receive but what it does to our character. the unit on imposter syndrome illustrated the negative effects of unhealthy expectations and views of success. however, this leads one to ask what is a healthy view of expectations, accomplishments, and the individual? julia hogan offers her solution: “instead of letting your life be defined by the grades you get or the promotions you earn, what if you focused on living a balanced life full of friends, family, work, and leisure?” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan, grottomoreau fye week nine). i think the key word here is “defined”. grades or promotions are not bad goals. however, problems arise when they are the main or only thing by which you define your worth. human beings are so much more than machines that accomplish laudable tasks. our worth and dignity cannot be summed up by a number or a certificate. i think balance is important. i agree that we can’t live according to the expectation of perfection (which is often fueled by an achievement based culture) because we inevitably will fall short of this goal as we are not perfect. however, this does not mean i don't believe we should strive to achieve greatness or that quality work should be rewarded. i do indeed believe that there are expectations by which we should live. however, i also believe society has perverted these expectations. i think we should always strive for the highest goal, but a goal that feeds the soul. you should do well in your studies for the sake of learning and the enrichment you can receive, not for the perfect gpa. your studies can still be fulfilling if you put effort into learning them, even if you don't receive a perfect grade. similarly, a grade on a paper can on the surface indicate that you achieved a great accomplishment, when in reality you https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104200 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104200 hghm anderson 5 put little effort into that class. however, this class would not be as fulfilling because of this lack of effort and interest, even if you still “achieved” a high grade. work is valuable. there are still standards for a good, fulfilling life. however, these standards should be rooted in something more fulfilling than the arbitrary trends of society. things like virtue, religion, family, and morality as opposed to a slip of paper or an averaged number. 4) i have realized it is much easier to complain than it is to be hopeful or joyful. however, joy and hope give one more fulfillment. palmer, in his article on community, talks about how people can always find something to complain about in any situation. he connects this to leadership:“it takes a deeply grounded leader—a leader with a source of identity independent of how popular he or she is with the group being led—to hold a space in which people can discover their resources while those same people resist, angrily accusing the leader of not earning his or her keep” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week eleven). palmer talked about how people often complain about leaders. he describes a situation where a teacher must teach children and is presented with the difficult situation of finding a balance between guiding and teaching the students their own knowledge and allowing time for the students to discover information themselves. he talked about how parents would complain either that their children weren't learning enough from the teacher or weren't being allowed to express themselves enough. this scenario reminded me of how easy it is to complain. we do it all the time. regardless of the outcome of a situation or people's behavior we can always find something to critique or complain about. however, though it is easy to complain, it is much https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104233 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104233 hghm anderson 6 harder to do something about those complaints or honestly, just be positive. hence, perhaps we should strive to produce real good and joy (which can also be found in embracing sacrifices) instead of just attacking and complaining about the world's shortcomings. one such example of this joy in the wake of suffering is the women in the video on kintsugi (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i thought this video was very interesting. i think it shows that art can have a definite impact on one's life. it can be a source of healing and a means for one to experience transcendence. i liked the concept of reconstructing broken poetry with gold to make something that was broken more beautiful than ever. i think this is a much healthier mentality than the idea that everything should always be perfect or that once something is broken it is irredeemable. she talked about how she wants people to know that their hearts are also breakable, but that this is a good thing because it shows that one loves. furthermore, heartbreak allows for one to grow and expand as one heals. i think this is in line with the idea of redemptive suffering. our pain is not the end. we can transform our broken, suffering lives into beautiful works of art through “gold” or the love and grace of god. this idea of hope, joy, suffering, and god’s grace is beautifly explored in c.s lewis’ screwtape letters: “do not be deceived, wormwood. our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i love this quote. it is inspiring, moving, piercing, and beautiful. it reveals the true power and depth of hope. hope is trust despite uncertainty and suffering -trust in god specifically. in lewis‘s rendition, it is a virtue that causes the devils to fear. in real life, hope is https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104212 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104246 hghm anderson 7 one of those things that allows humans to experience a supernatural and transcendent emotion. the ability to still trust in god despite all the suffering around you and furthermore, to use that suffering as sanctification and a way to increase in virtue and character, or as lewis puts it, unite yourself to god, is incredibly reassuring and powerful. it is testament to the beauty of the good. hope is often associated with optimism and positivity, but interestly enough hope occurs in the face of darkness. it exists because our world is fallen. it is a response to suffering that is so beautiful and powerful, it inspires goodness. hghm anderson 8 integration 2 more than capable in my time here at notre dame, i have encountered many different things. some of those things being good and some bad with the majority of it being good. in week 9 we talked about encountering dissonance. particularly, this dissonance for me came in a form of imposter syndrome and the internal battle that takes place in our minds. the first time i remember encountering imposter syndrome relative to notre dame was when i was applying to get into the university. it gave me negative thoughts like “am i smart enough to go here” or “theirs no way i even get accepted”. with that being said obviously, i was accepted but that’s when the real imposter syndrome came. in week 9 elizabeth cox in her video “ what is imposter syndrome” said something that was unbelievably relatable to me. she said, “ some thought that their acceptance was an admission error”. i actually laughed at this quote when i first heard it because this was me. when i found out that i was accepted into such a prestigious university i immediately thought that this had to have been some sort of error on the university. relative to my time here, a couple of weeks ago i turned in an essay for my western civilizations class and got a 90 as a grade. my academic counselor was very happy about this but unfortunately, my imposter syndrome kicked in and said that “it was probably a mistake” followed by “i got lucky”. through this course, i have learned that i am not the only one that battles these thoughts. i saw this clearly when other people were raising their hands and talking about their own experiences. a strategy i will implement in the next semester will be immediately fighting the syndrome with positive self talk a skill i learned from some of the older guys that helped them get through their times here at notre dame. there were all kinds of different ideas for self-talk but the one that stuck out to me using a rubberband i have on my rest snapping it and then saying something positive about myself and or something positive about my ability and i have found this to be very helpful. i believe if i continue doing that, there will be no room left for imposter syndrome. in week 10 when we discussed encountering brokenness. for me personally, i encountered this 2 different times and they both were equally as bad. the first being the 2 weeks that i was in quarantine. the worst time of my life. it was bad because not only was i sick, i was alone and the thing that hurt most was i had to watch the team play 2 full games and i didn’t get to be a part of it at all not even.. not even on the sideline. the second time was when i was in my dorm room and the realization that i was going to be 553 miles away from the people i love. that feeling that suddenly hit me broke my heart and crushed my spirits. looking back on that it’s interesting because college was something i used to dream about. i knew before that there was a way to recover from this and now being out of that isolation i know that the way i recovered is key and could benefit others as well and not only myself. in the video, kirsten hegelson mentions that she experienced healing by repairing broken pottery. she also says “that they learn that the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today.” for me personally, i experience that same healing from god. through this course, i've learned hat reading the bible or watching steven furtick or micahel tood's youtube videos can help me respond to and recover from brokenness. when i think back on the times i did and didn't do those things, i realize that they allowed me to experience healing in a far more deep way when i did. in week 11 we discuss ecountering community. i have encountered a sense of community through 3 new friends i made who are on the football team. they are now some of my closest friends. i have also made some friends in this community who aren’t on the sports team that have been really nice and helpful to me. for example my roommate has been really thoughtful and also given me some ways to improve my essay. “change is difficult but more possible when we see and hear multiple voices.” i thinks this quote is great and it makes me realize why i enjoy being around those four guys. their names are kahanu, barret, and davis. we are all from all over the country and kahuna is from hawaii. this allows all kinds of different opinions, lifestyles, and conversations to take place which results in us growing deeper bonds and connections. reflecting on this, next semester my goal is to try and open myself up more in the community and try to connect with new people and hopefully becomes friends. in week 12 we talk about encountering hope. i encountered hope many times this year and it’s through god. knowing and believing that i am never alone and that he is always by my side. for example when i was in quarantine it was a time when i encounter hope because although i wasn’t able to plays those 2 games. i knew that because of god things were going to better in the end. i am a firm believer in everything happening for a reason. i know it happened for a reason and something great is going to come from it. “ our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys”. this quote proves my point because even though things aren’t going my way all the time. i still have hope in gods plans for me. i have learned through this class that being hopeful is something that i need to continue to do to keep my spirts and in the future i plan to focus on being full of hope everyday. video: "what is imposter syndrome?" (elizabeth cox, ted-ed) moreau fye week 9 ) video :“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” ( grotto) moreau fye week 10) "diversity matters (links to an external site.) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 !" (prof. agustin fuentes) moreau fye week 11) ( "the screwtape letters" chapter 8 download "the screwtape letters" chapter 8 (c.s. lewis) moreau fye week 12 ) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826/download?download_frd=1 integration one (moroue) what do i believe? what people believe in is very important. it shapes their views and moulds them into who they are. that is why it is important to recognize what you believe or in other words who you are. sink into what you are instead of pretending to be someone else, my friend once told me. i couldn’t have phrased it better myself. but to do it i have to ask myself what do i believe who am i? i believe that i am searching for a place where i belong and can be myself fully. as berne brown said in her ted talk “is there something about me, that if other people know or or see it, that i won’ be worthy of connection?”. i try to find a place where that is not true. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by doing my best to understand and support others. i believe that when you are always good, then it pays off. i believe it is important to help others in your environment because as carla ?harris put it in her award receiving speech “help anyone you can, just because you can”. i also try to stay away from any kind of quarrels. “beware of the friend who says they hate drama.“ says olivia taylor in her article. i find that to be a good advice. that is why i never will be “that friend”. i believe that my purpose is to do something, that’s meaningful to me and by that i mean something that would transcend my understanding of the world, something that would make me feel like i for a second nothing is more important. i believe the world we live in is incredibly beautiful and so full of mysteries that when somebody says they “are bored” or that “there is nothing to do” /i can barely believe they actually believe it i think that there is more to know than we can imagine and the only thing stopping us from knowing is ourselves. while i believe that the world is beautiful it is not without its own faults. i believe there is a lot to be fixed on the world around me and i hope one day i will have enough influence to thang the world for better. but before i am able to decide how to do it, i have to discover myself. “in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” says david brooks in his ted talk. i find that to be true. only by loosing myself in my passion am i able to find out who i am. i believe that i should always seek motivation. without it i wouldn’t be where i am. sometimes when i am alone i have to motivate myself. whenever i think of a plan i tell myself “one day, or day one?”. i believe this is a great way to motivate anyone. this is a really empowering thought that makes people realize that they are in control of their lives. i don’t believe anything is impossible. i from 1903 the year when the wright brothers invented the first plane till 1969 the year the first moon landing occurred only 66 years passed that means within a lifetime anything is possible. imagine someone who was born in 1885. that person would be 18 at the time when the first plane was flown. that would revolutionize their idea of transport. this would make them believe that anything is possible. think about that person at 86 watching people flying to the moon live on their tv (which also was an incredible invention in its own). the sheer amazement that they felt must be indescribable. i wish that when working in such projects one day i will kn ow how that feels. i believe that i am responsible for every success and failure that’s i have endured. i believe that such a believe is what makes me the hard worker that i am. while it may not sound great that i make myself feel bad about all my failures i can definitely say it works. i also makes every success feel 10 times better. i think success is a choice and people try to say it is not because they don’t want to put in the effort. i believe that i pursue truth by identifying all narratives that i encounter. i believe it is extremely important to be as close to objective as it is possible. the only motivations we should have are truth and justice. i believe that if i want to lead in my life, i need to learn to do so fairly and morally. pursuing truth can be very challenging, but there is no other way to lead a meaningful and fair life. without truth we don’t know anything and everything is an illusion. without truth there is no love, no happiness, no kindness, but just a mirage. there is a huge danger that comes with identifying just one narrative. i also try to stay true to myself. i believe it is crucial. steve jobs once said “your life is limited. don’t waste it living someone else’s life.”. i fully agree with him. there is nothing worse than pretending to be someone else because “my parents wanted to” or “this way i could make more money”. i don’t believe those things have any value. the only thing that matters would be who somebody wants to be. by living a life of pretending one will never be truly happy, there will only be the appearance of happiness. true happiness is gained through discovering who you are and simply doing what you want to. the faster someone realizes the better since it could be painful if we have been invested in a lie for years. but no matter how valuable a ship is there is no point in staying on it when it is doomed to sink. i believe that my community should always aim to improve. i always try to help people around me since i learn myself in the process. i believe life is a chase after perfection. and while we never will achieve it, it is certainly worth trying. i believe that my purpose is to make the world a better place. that is what i will do. exercise in factorization: the prime factors of me one of my favorite hobbies is solving difficult math problems with computer science. something that comes up often while doing so is the act of factoring large numbers. the process involves taking a number and breaking it down into factors that can multiply together to make it. for instance, the number 1234567890 can be factored as 2 x 3 x 3 x 5 x 3607 x 3803. what’s interesting about this is that not only does it have complex factors like 3607 and 3803, but also incredibly simple ones, like 2, 3, and 5. in this paper, i hope to do something similar – just using myself, rather than a number. indeed, some of my values are simple, but others can be very complicated. i believe that i am made to push forward regardless of the circumstances, to find a way forward when there aren’t any apparent paths. this has been a core belief of mine for a while now. i’ve been in many situations in the past where there simply hasn’t seemed to be any logical way for me to accomplish my goals, to get the homework done before the due date, to find a simple and elegant solution for the problem in front of me, or to appease everyone involved in the situation. however, in most of these cases, by either working hard or thinking of a clever solution, i’ve been able to resolve my issues. many of the experiences in my life have taught me the value of perseverance, and i don’t plan on dropping it any time soon. as fr. pete said, “resist the temptation to throw your shoe halfway across the room when the knot doesn’t come out” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c – moreau fye week three). in the future, i plan on solving many daunting problems by working hard and thinking out of the box, just as i always have. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois i believe that i thrive with the relationships that i forge with people. whether it be a friend i haven’t spoken to in ages or a professor that i’m working on a project with, the people in my life make things interesting and make the world a place worth living in. i’m extremely grateful for my friends, who haven’t left my side since i met them, and continue to enrich my life with their presence. this is the way things should be – as olivia taylor says, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing something in the long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto – moreau fye week four). of course, friendships and most relationships are a two-way street – i hope that my friends find my presence to be as joyful as i find theirs. when i arrived at notre dame, i found myself worrying about how often i should contact my friends. i wanted to keep in touch with them, but at the same time i didn’t want to violate their feelings of independence. over time, however, i’ve learned that it’s best to keep in contact with your friends regularly regardless of the situation – not only is it good for you, but they also appreciate it too! in the future, i plan on keeping my friends close, no matter how far we may be physically. i believe that my vulnerability makes me approachable. i’ve always been nervous about sharing a lot about myself when meeting new people and making friends, but at notre dame i’ve learned that there’s a lot to be gained by being vulnerable to others. when you’re vulnerable, you open yourself up for others, and allow them to relate more deeply to you. in the end, this only results in stronger relationships. as dr. brown says, “i know that vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love…” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). in the future, i plan on using what i’ve learned to forge better relationships and strengthen the ones that i already have. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 i believe that i should focus on myself and my health before my resumé. this has always been a struggle for me – my parents have drilled it into me that i should focus on my future and strive to do well in life, so i’ve always struggled with deciding how much i should prioritize my work. over time, though, i’ve realized that i gain a lot more happiness when i’m not constantly focused on what i should be doing to better my resumé. as david brooks said in his ted talk, “that turns you into a shrewd animal, that treats life as a game, slips you into a sense of mediocrity, …, you’re not earning the sort of eulogy that you want” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, ted – moreau fye week two). of course, this isn’t to say that working for your resumé is meaningless – it just means that it shouldn’t be the forefront of your life. in the future, i hope to find the right balance between the two. i believe that helping others is my purpose in life. throughout my school career, i’ve found that i’ve been able to do well in my math and science classes – i’ve had a knack for those subjects. i’ve also found that it makes me feel great to help out others, where this may not be the case. tutoring others is extremely rewarding – after all, “it is what you do for others, that counts” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week five). here at notre dame, i’ve been seeking out volunteer positions. right now, i mainly just help with the first aid services at football games with fast. i’ve also been helping my roommate with his math homework! helping out others makes me feel whole, and i’m glad i can continue doing so at notre dame. i believe that i should pursue truth by seeking out the stories of many. i feel like in the past, i haven’t been critical enough of all the information that i hear. in the age of the internet, it’s very easy to spread misinformation. not only that, but for a while i didn’t think that i was susceptible to misinformation – as adichie succinctly puts it, “it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 nice” (“danger of a single story” by chimimanda ngozi adichie, moreau fye week seven). that being said, i think this one is a bit simpler to tackle. in the future, i’ll be sure to verify information that i learn with multiple sources before taking it as fact, and when i learn information for the first time i’ll be sure to take it with a grain of salt. hopefully, i can gain a more complete and true picture of the world by doing so. i believe that understanding my past allows me to make wiser decisions in the future. not only is it nice to reminisce about the events that led up to where i am now, but in doing so i review the decisions i’ve made in the past, both the wise and unwise ones. i got the chance to do so when i was writing my “where i’m from” poem during week six. by reviewing my past, i hope to make a better future for myself. i can’t wait to see what these four years at notre dame have in store for me! https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story leshak michael comuniello fys-10101 15 15 october 2021 from beliefs to belonging in an 1842 letter addressed to father moreau, father edward sorin described the mission of notre dame for the first time, claiming, “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842 (pages 1-6) moreau fye week five). father sorin knew nothing of what this university would become, but he had a vision, a hope for its future. it is not without reason that notre dame’s fame is as golden as her dome, as my first two months here have proven that father sorin was exactly right in his characterization of the future of the university he founded. notre dame certainly did not know who i would become in my four years on her campus but accepted me in the hope that i would contribute to her crusade for good in some way. every award and test grade i received in high school was earned in anxious anticipation of the day my acceptance letter would finally arrive. after eighteen years of awaiting my first walk past the dome, my dorm assignment, and of course my ticket to the student section, i was overjoyed upon my arrival at this place. i knew that notre dame was special, full of tradition and opportunity, but i had no idea how much this school would strengthen the core beliefs i had built before arriving here. however, there is one new core belief i have developed as the result of a combination of my preexisting beliefs since my arrival at notre dame: i belong here. my first core belief is this: i believe that i am responsible for making positive change in the world. for as long as i can remember, when asked what i wanted to be when i grew up, i responded confidently, “an engineer”. while this response was first prompted by the fact that i was a promising student in science and math as a child, the thing that made me truly long for a career in engineering was the fact that it would allow me to pursue my greatest passion in life serving others. in reflecting on david brooks’ ted talk from week two of this course, i wish not to work towards resume virtues with my engineering degree, but i instead want to build eulogy virtues, becoming the best version of myself by helping others through my work. to me, no career is worthwhile if it is not impacting someone for the better (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). luckily, this belief is supported by every aspect of student life at notre dame, both inside and outside of the classroom setting. after only a month here, i joined a club called e-nable, which has allowed me to design and manufacture a prosthetic arm for a little girl who received the news that she had been selected with a grin that i will never forget on her face. outside of engineering, i am involved in notre dame’s make-a-wish club, which is currently fundraising to make this year’s wishkid’s dream trip come true. i plan to continue this trend of service throughout my college experience and for the rest of my life, as i aspire to a career in the field of prosthetics or artificial organs. i plan to take advantage of every research opportunity and course i can in my remaining time at notre dame in order to make this dream a reality. in order to make positive change in the world, one must acquire the knowledge necessary to do so. as such, i believe that knowledge is power. in my eyes, there are two types of knowledge: academic knowledge, knowledge of anatomy, engineering design, and biology, and social knowledge, knowledge of other people’s stories. i came to notre dame with the intent of gaining academic knowledge, learning how to design models in cad and finally understanding the inner workings of a prosthetic hand, but i have found that i am gaining just as much knowledge from the different people and perspectives i have been introduced to as i am from my engineering classes. in her ted talk that served as the material for the discussion during week seven, chimamanda ngozi adichie warns her audience of the danger of a single story. she says, “we are impressionable in the face of a story, particularly as children,” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). for me, college has been my first time away from home, the first time i have been exposed to stories different than my own, the stories that i have been told by the people around me who i have known all my life. i have gained so much knowledge from this moreau class alone, learning from the differences between myself and my classmates and opening myself up to people who were strangers to me at the beginning of the school year. one experience regarding learning from others that stands out to me is learning about the cultures of korea and brazil from my friend yuna who lives on my floor. yuna has taught me a few phrases in portuguese, and i even got to try some of her favorite korean snacks while talking about how competitive the school system was when she was a child in korea. the very first module material of the semester, the ted talk by brené brown, explained the power of vulnerability, the way that we can build up community by breaking down our own personal walls. brown says, “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). by telling me all about her childhood, yuna allowed me to see into her past, and it brought us much closer as friends. vulnerability is something that i have always feared, but it is easy to see that it is the very thing that leads to the supportive, family-like community here at notre dame. i fully expected that notre dame would strengthen my idea that knowledge is power, but i never would have expected the tweak in my definition of knowledge that this university has caused. in order to continue growing in this social knowledge, i plan to study abroad and to travel in the future in order to gain as many new perspectives and hear as many stories as i can. while my academic knowledge and desire to make change are the qualities that most people would determine to be the ones that led to my acceptance to notre dame, i like to think otherwise. although i worked hard to ensure that my grades and extracurricular activities were near-perfect in high school, the values that the people i love instilled in me were far more important in making me stand out as an applicant who demonstrated the mission of notre dame. as such, i truly believe that the important relationships in my life have shaped me into the person i am today. during week six of this course, we were asked to ponder what formed us. when i thought about this question, i instantaneously thought of my parents, my friends at home, my great, big, notre dame football-loving, irish family. in listening to my classmates' poems, i realized that no one reflected much on the places they were from themselves, but rather the people who made those places home. however, there were also a few mentions of relationships that shaped my classmates in a negative way. as was discussed in week four, some relationships in our lives are unhealthy, relying on intimidation, dishonesty, and dependence to stay alive (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). fortunately, i have seen exactly the opposite in the relationships i’ve formed here at notre dame. everybody is willing to help me to succeed, cheering me on, never competing but rather collaborating. this is a wonderful environment that i lacked with my friends in high school, and i have already had these healthy, beneficial relationships make a change in my values, such as allowing me to appreciate vulnerability and let my authenticity shine through. one such relationship is the one with my roommate, lauren. as the oldest child, i have never had to share a room before, and i quickly learned that there is not enough space to be closed off when you share a twelve-by-fourteen foot room with another person. lauren and i started off as complete strangers, randomly assigned roommates who lived twenty hours apart, but i am now happy to call her my best friend. she has seen me laugh and cry, stress over exams, and has to deal with my constant singing in our dorm room, but most importantly, lauren has gotten to know the most authentic version of me, and i think that that is a very powerful part of the dorm community at notre dame. in addition to human relationships, there is one important relationship discussed in class that has shaped me more than any other: my faith. in the video from the week three module, father pete mccormick emphasizes the phrase, “faith is the framework for our lives,” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week three). faith has certainly served as my framework, and the faith life at notre dame fully supports this ideal. as a catholic institution, notre dame shifts our view as students from ourselves to the rest of the world, to the people around us, creating a campus community that allows each member to be shaped into a more well-rounded, virtuous person. i plan on continuing to allow notre dame to shape me by seeking out new healthy relationships and engaging in campus ministry events, such as the discover retreat and mercy works, that will allow me to share in my faith with my classmates. in just eight weeks at notre dame, the three most important core beliefs in my life have been adjusted for the better through new experiences and strengthened more than i could have ever imagined. i have already found ways to make positive change in the world in my career field through e-nable, an act of service i never would have thought myself capable of freshman year. i have gained the knowledge of perspective that i have learned is just as powerful as the academic knowledge that i am acquiring for my career. i have realized that the important people in my life prior to notre dame have shaped me into the person standing on this campus today. father sorin was correct in his prediction that notre dame was to be a place where good was inspired, and i am so blessed to be a contributor to his mission. my core beliefs make me a perfect fit for this university, and as a result, i know one final belief to be true: i belong here. moreau integration 2 prof. chan moreau fye 11.27.21 integration ii as semester one of moreau comes to a close, i am grateful to have had the time for true introspection to buttress my education. in this time i’ve certainly encountered a few things. in week nine, we discussed imposter syndrome, and those who feel like they do not deserve the success they find. this is very real at notre dame, as i have found it directly among my peers, especially those in my freshmen class. the amount of times i hear “i don’t know how i got in” or “i feel like everyone is just smarter/more accomplished than me” is somewhat worrying. one of my friends in the nd merit scholar’s program with me (which getting into is already in and of itself an accomplishment) posted on his instagram story, “who else feels the imposter syndrome?” clearly, everyone here must’ve done something right to be admitted. the fact that they downplay their achievements is somewhat saddening as it shows a lack of self confidence. while it’s okay to feel this way sometimes, it should not be an overarching mindset that invades everything someone does. as someone who has never really felt imposter syndrome (in my qqc i discussed how receiving a lot of praise and encouragement from my parents my whole life helped drastically) i can’t speak to how it must feel firsthand, but i do think it can be incredibly harmful and therefore should be confronted. these students should be told, by their peers, their parents, their advisors, that they do deserve to be here, and that they shouldn’t waste this precious opportunity by being too scared to grow and learn because they discount their qualification in the first place. this involves vulnerability, among other things. the grotto article by julia hogan sums this up nicely: “the point is, these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life.” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). there is no standard written in the sky telling notre dame students, or any student in the nation, what they must accomplish or how they must succeed. we make our own mental prisons if we try to reach for an unreachable height. we should not let the accomplishments of others detract from our own. in week ten, i came face to face with different solutions for inclusivity within communities. we live in such a politically charged, polarized society, and the toxicity encroaches every. friendships are burned, family members forgotten, and common sense is often tossed aside in favor of identity politics and villainizing all who dare disagree with us. in order for our society to ever heal, i’ve come to believe that reconciliation must begin on college campuses, where the latest ideas are being churned around in the minds of future leaders. we must begin to open up and have dialogue with each other. fr. jenkins speaks of the importance of love in his wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address (fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider.” we must do all things in and through love, in order to effectively reach out to others and begin to heal this massive rift. now, one possible solution that has been presented to tensions today is critical race theory. i am going out on a limb and saying that this is not the best route to take if we want healing. blaming an entire group of people for things in the past and generalizing all the evils on earth to one race is wrong. you are only shifting the discrimination to a new type of person. this will do nothing for our efforts to reconcile with each other and instead only spread acrimony and victim mentalities. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ love does not blame, and i hope more people come to realize that there are much better ways to heal. recognizing injustice is important but it should not come at the cost of more relationships. one thing i am grateful for is that notre dame has a diversity of political views but this does not come at the cost of cordiality. most people are very kind even if you disagree with them, or are at least civil about it. i love that this atmosphere fosters conversations and reaches out across divides whether they be racial, political, religious, socioeconomic, or all of the above. it is a wonderful thing to remember kindness and love at all times and live those values out, even when we may prefer to shut people out of our lives. week eleven tied into week ten, discussing diversity and community and the importance of diversity in community. the takeaway for me, as someone who is an ethnic minority, was similar to week ten. we must have love and respect for all. i have experienced all sorts of slight instances of racism, to flat out joke about me “eating dogs” or people squinting their eyes at me. even when it is easy to meet hate with hate, blow for blow, we must be bigger than those who may be close-minded. “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy.’” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). we cannot just surround ourselves with those we like or agree with. communities grow from dissonance, from disagreeing and then compromising and coming together in the midst of hardships or strife. communities must ultimately include those we don’t agree with if we are to have any hope of learning and growing further than an echo chamber would ever take us. again, notre dame is special in how members of this community are always open and caring, no matter their views or disagreements. it fosters a safe environment for all beliefs and valuable dialogue. some of my closest friends hold vastly different beliefs than i do. yet, when i was sick, one of them walked all the way down from north quad to bring me some hot tea (i live on south quad). http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ someone’s political views do not define who they are; similarly, we should not make our political beliefs the only thing we ever think or talk about. week twelve confronted us with hard questions about hope. we discussed things such as “what hope looks like” or how it differs from optimism. the discussions in class helped me somewhat shape my ideas about hope into something more concrete. first and foremost, because of my beliefs, i think hope is ultimately personified in jesus christ. because of our common brokenness, our hatred and our fallen natures, we have no hope of anything greater without christ bridging the gap between ourselves and god. that feeling of expectation, of assurance of something greater, is akin to both faith and hope. now, optimism is more of a constant outlook, a kind of steady personality trait that makes someone look for the good in everything. this is a good thing, of course, but a little different from hope. hope is the idea that something will happen, no matter the circumstances. it looks beyond current situations to something in the future, perhaps not yet realized but soon to be (we hope). for example, i have the hope of heaven and a future with god and that in turn gives me the optimism i have in daily life. we read an excerpt from the screwtape letters, by c.s. lewis, for the materials in week twelve. screwtape highlights how “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy's will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys.” ("the screwtape letters" chapter 8 c.s. lewis moreau fye). we are at our strongest when there is no clear resolution or happy ending right in front of us, but we keep going despite grim or bleak circumstances. we utilize both hope and optimism to continue, even when god, or our family and friends, or our government, or everyone around us seems far away. when we cannot see the way, we must strive even harder. this applies once more to our previous ideas on community and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?wrap=1 clashes between ideologies. even if there is no clear benefit to being forgiving and open-minded, we should keep loving our “enemies” as one day, if everyone does this, we can hope for a future where everyone is respectful. if we give up because we think we are making no progress, or if we continue to think that bad test grades disqualify our presence at this institution, we will never pull ourselves out of the mired problems we face. without hope, we have nothing. i think one last point that is important to discuss is being genuine. you don’t have to pretend to believe something that you don’t, or agree for the sake of avoiding conflict. if you show others that you truly passionately care about your beliefs and that you have good reasons for believing certain things, they will help others to begin to see the validity of your views and seriously consider why you think a certain way and why they do not. being tactfully honest and willing to have a conversation with someone you disagree with is the first step towards a warmer community and strengthening our nd family. as a whole, these questions about how to grow community and a feeling of togetherness are truly the most important questions i’ve had to think about. they apply not only to notre dame, but to our country, and even the whole world. we must see the humanity in everyone. i think i now care less about comparing myself to others, and instead look for other’s strengths and how i can learn from them or inspire others to be better. the solutions to these problems are certainly more complex than “just be kind” but also more clarified in terms of what may not be the best solutions. i do think that the religious values present on this campus contribute to the warm environment, even if some people think otherwise. regardless, the importance of love and its role in healing and reconciliation cannot be stressed enough. hopefully we can all find hope in the fact that love will oneday overcome all this turmoil. p.s. big thank you to professor chan for leading our moreau section and fostering an environment of respect, joy, and camaraderie and helping us first years acclimate to nd, even if you haven’t been here for very long either. i know i speak for everyone in our section when i say this was the best possible moreau section we could’ve gotten. whenever i see my classmates outside of the moreau classroom they only have positive things to say about you and i know many of them, myself included, tried to get your section for the spring. while i was not able to fit in into my schedule, i know you will continue doing a wonderful job of helping first year students grow and nurture them beautifully. thank you for everything. sincerely, unanue 1 redefining who i am to myself: who i know i am know i believe that i am responsible for more than just my own actions and wellbeing because how much i achieve benefits not only myself but those i care most as well. i believe that i am growing stronger everyday by completing the challenges i set myself and not just telling myself that i’ll get it done one day (that might never come). i believe that i pursue relationship only with those i view i share common interest and traits with so that i can truly trust those i surround myself with. i believe that i am actively striving to help improve my community. whether it is my native community back home in puerto rico, or the new one i have joined here in notre dame, i am ensuring i only give it my best self. the root beliefs written above are what i deem to be the essence of my character. they are beliefs i had not realized or acknowledge i had until i sat down at my first class of moreau first year experience. with each class that followed, week after week, i began to better understand not only my root beliefs but more importantly how those beliefs interact with my daily life. after roughly two months of self-analyzing through open discussion among peers in classes and typing away at moreau work, i feel confident i am able to completely describe the origins, development, challenges, and implications of each root belief. the first root belief that came to my mind was about how my actions (and even mentality) affect more than just myself. that root belief that i have to do my best not only for myself, but for those close to me can be traced back to as early as seventh grade when i first started to be an active member of my model united nations team with my best friends. i realized that i was no longer just studying for competitions just so that i wouldn’t fail, i was studying because i realized that the more i achieved, the more i helped the very people i had joined model united nations in the first place for. even today i still use think of that root belief at least twice a week as i recall i didn’t leave puerto rico to study in the states out of selfish intentions. with every assignment i am struggling with to find motivation to finish, i just recall everyone i want to help back in my home island. the quote we have been swimming in waters that feel bottomless, but on such occasions our toes just touch the bedrock. and as love dawns, unanue 2 so does our sight” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg – moreau fye week 3) really resonates with how i feel about my first root belief. in a similar fashion, my second root belief focuses on completing goals and actions; however, what differentiates my second root belief would be its focus on internal motivation to achieve goals. at the beginning of the semester, this root belief was epitomized by my lack of motivation to workout. although i had followed a workout routine this whole summer, i had struggled to continue with it for a few weeks in september as i always put off working out for later after i studied and, to be completely honest, wasted my time online afterwards instead of going to the gym. it was around the later end of september that a moreau class where the focus was the immunity map worksheet that i got back on track. i realized my issue was that relaxing was my competing commitment to working out and that my then current behavior of getting work done leisurely but on time was affecting my goals to workout. since then, i started to implement a general schedule of trying to get as much work done between classes so that i can workout and relax at night. after that, i began to realize that my root belief of setting a challenge, in this case it was reincorporating working out to my new life as a college student, and prioritizing achieving that goal was something i had in me all along which truly made me feel both physically and mentally healthier and also brought me joy. my third root belief defined the actions anyone around me experienced throughout any initial social interactions i ventured through as the semester began. the origin of my third root belief of ensuring quality friends over a quantity of friends is stems from my fear of accepting fake friends which i first experienced during high school. although fear might be an extreme word, i view the basis of a friendship or relationship to be trust and for that both sides have to respect each other equally. this belief was only further cemented as i read the moreau modules for week 4 in which the unhealthy friendships were outlined (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor -moreau fye week 4). the root belief that i shouldn’t feel forced to make friends i don’t have that much in common with is what helped connect me with the latino community here at notre dame which helped me get through the first few weeks of college life. the fourth root belief is one that was taught to me by the culture that i group up in. the idea that one helps serve those around him is what, especially during tough times, cannot hit any unanue 3 closure to home for me as i quite literally lived through multiple natural disasters that required neighbors, acquaintances, friends, and family to all work together to recuperate. this sense of community was one of reasons i chose to come to notre dame as i the close sense of community on campus to be similar to the one i know in puerto rico. the root belief of giving your best to the community around you was challenging to act upon when first arriving to notre dame as i felt i was not yet truly one with the campus culture yet, but ironically it was the notre dame community itself that helped me quickly feel as if i was back home. the idea that even as a bystander here at notre dame, you intervene to help any victim (“it’s on us ndthe three d’s of being an active bystander – moreau fye week 4) helped make me understand the depth at which i should go with my root belief of serving the community, that no matter what the situation is, domers protect one another. integration 2 transitioning optimism and good intentions to action i am a deep thinker. my ideal way of processing situations and handling conflict is to mull it over for a while and approach people in a friendly manner. although i am very agreeable initially, i have very few ideas that have permanence in my mind, and to change those ideas would take much reinforcement and effort. at notre dame, i have encountered a completely new social scene, expectations, language, people, and education. while i feel as if i have matured in college already socially, i also feel somewhat incomplete as a person and critical of the dialogue in many relationships. in terms of academics, i feel confident and at ease, but in the back of my mind the question of what to study and what to do lingers as others plan for internships or pursue careers in more practical fields. i have encountered a group of people exponentially more privileged than those i went to high school with, and a cultural diversity that is also completely different from what i am familiar with. i have already started to respond and come to terms with some of these situations, but in others, i have yet to do so in a way meaningful to me. in "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit", julia hogan writes, “preconceived ideas college students arrive with can make for a defeating experience(julia hogan moreau fye week 9).” i made a point to not arrive at college with any expectations except that i would make lifelong friends. my parent’s experience in college informed my expectations largely because that is where they met each other and several of their favorite people today. i think that i have not been pessimistic about the party scene, the academics, or the diversity of this campus because of that, all to my benefit; however, my expectation for great friends and my past experience of great friends at home has been a minor stressor in my experience. i want to be a part of a friend group in which we understand each other, but i am wary of buying into any one group at the risk of not being exactly who i want to be. i think that i will respond to this situation by trying to be more inclusive and creative with my plans and weekends, especially as the game days fade away. back home, i created my friend group by combining my favorite people together, and luckily they clicked with each other as well. to an extent, that is also what i want to do here. one inner conflict i have encountered in my time here is the willingness to stick up for what is right. at home, most people operated on the same beliefs socially, in which we believed that it was essential to live in a way that respects everyone’s right to be themselves. here, i have found less uniformity in that belief in terms of language. i frequently hear people, and many times people i like, say words like “retard” or “faggot”, and i often do nothing out of fear of making a scene in a stage of college that seems so formative. in his 2012 commencement address, father jenkins says, “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia — the prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse(john jenkins, wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, moreau fye week 10).” to respond to this encounter with language i disagree with, i want to act with more conviction and integrity and tell people, in my own way, that i do not think what they are saying is right and why i think so. i cannot have a clear conscience unless i do so. in terms of building community, i believe that i have already come far, but that i have far to go. my dorm has an amazing community, full of friendly and engaged people, and has been the place most of my activity surrounds itself around. i play sports, read at mass, attend hall council, talk to those i don’t know and keep tabs on the ones i do. i have been so passionate about it that i plan on running for hall council vice president next year. “but a capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives(parker palmer, center for courage and renewal, moreau fye week 11).” i feel that my capacity for connectedness has completely increased since i got here, and that is why i feel so confident and content in this dorm and at notre dame. however, there are still many ways i can push myself to be more social. i have encountered a community in siegfried and my honors classes, and i will respond by not being complacent and continuing to behave in a way that forces me to put myself out there. i have also encountered religion more in my time here than any other time in my life. i went to a public school throughout my childhood, and rarely discussed theology apart from scattered ccd classes. although i went to church often when i was younger, after i and my brothers became confirmed we started going less; now, i go every week. although i am more agnostic than christian, i continue to participate as part of the chapel as a member and lector because i believe that there is something to be gained by thinking of others and by centering yourself. it is a reset for me each week. “the danger of the trend since the onset of enlightenment to compartmentalize theology and rely solely upon human knowledge(hope-holy cross and christian education, moreau fye, week 12).” whether i believe in god or not, i do believe that finding time to be connected in reflection and love for each other regularly is healthy, and that is what mass is every week for me. combining that room for thought is an asset, not a cost, to my education in life. claudia o’sullivan december 3rd, 2021 moreau moreau integration two as i left home for school, i found that one of my biggest struggles was my lack of control over time. time moves at a uniform rate and we can’t stop it or slow it down. i chose notre dame subconsciously because i felt like going to a school that was imbued with family values and traditions would imitate some control over time. i would feel connected with both past and future domers. i even got a matching stick and poke tattoo with my best friends because i was trying to make the love we had for each other permanent. however, getting here, i realized that nothing had changed with my friends at home. and for the first time, i tried to embrace change instead of resisting it. being vulnerable with my friends that i’ve made in college has been integral to this new perspective on change. i felt like i was alone in my deep anxieties to live away from my loved ones and leave the live i cherished at home. however i realized i was suffering from the pluraristic ignorance in the imposter syndrome video that is described as when “we doubt ourselves privately but believe that we’re alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). i think that most people feel anxiety from not having control over time and being constantly in motion, but maybe we could all feel a little more control if we were honest with each other about it. something i noticed when i arrived here was how sweet everyone was to each other. it made me wonder why people felt like they owed it to each other to check in. i realized that, perhaps because of the spirituality and community of nd, people recognize that we are all in this human race together and therefore we owe each other a level of dignity. although we might not love every domer here, we can treat others as if we loved them. people are from all over the world so it’s likely that disagreement will happen. but this is actually productive because without disagreement and doubt, there wouldn’t be as much of a commitment to pursuing truth. as parker j. palmer explained, “community is a gift to be received” (13 ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). we might struggle to come together because every human has a unique upbringing and identity, but we are all equal and owe it to each other to try. for example, in his talk, prof. agustin fuentes said, the patterned differences between races are due to “social, historical, political, economic and experimental contexts” (diversity matters! by agustin fuentesmoreau fye week eleven). in other words, differences are not because races are biologically different, they are just outcomes from history and people’s subjective experiences. that refers to race but can be applied to most diffenrences in identity. during the late night talks that my friends and i have had, there has been some disagreement but fortunately there has never been hatred. even if we aren’t able to agree, we all still try to learn and remember that this pursuit is out of love. for example, i am not very religious but i appreciate the faith and virtue of religion and try to bond with my more religious friends over that. but, overall, the religiousness of nd has been a pretty big adjustment for me. back at home, my family wasn’t very christian and most of my friends were actually jewish. however, i’ve found that it doesn’t matter that i’m not very devoted to faith because i am devoted to other students of notre dame and the love that religion promotes. i feel like the spirtuality is guiding me hopefully to be a better person. as rev. james b. king, c.s.c. said, “in discovering the truth of who we are as human creatures with social obligations, born with an innate desire to love and be loved, we are freed and empowered to become something better.” (holy cross and christian education by rev. james b. king, c.s.c.moreau fye week twelve) we all have the capacity to make significant change and help the world, and perhaps virtues and catholic values can be a great reminder of our power as people and how to create that common good. however, i have struggled with the idea of religion and truth. i believe that i would probably be happier if i was more religious. i wouldn’t fear mortality as much, feel a lack of control over time, and i’d know my purpose more clearly. however, i feel obligated to pursue truth more than happiness for whatever reason. and there will probably never be sensible proof that can confirm the existence or lack thereof of god, therefore we need to rely on our reason and “heart” to make our decision. regardless, i don’t want to have such a conviction either way because i believe i will be learning for the rest of my life. in the words of fr. john jenkins, “without conviction, there would be no hope. conviction, however, is not all good. it can easily be corrupted by pride and greed and lead to hatred and division.” (wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by fr. john jenkins, csc.moreau fye week ten) for the rest of my journey at nd, i am going to focus on balancing openness and confidence in my beliefs. because on the other hand of things, if you stand for nothing, you’ll fall for everything! i think the relationships that i’ve formed so far define my first semester. it is so strange and exciting that to think that i’ll keep the bonds i’ve formed so far for the rest of my life. and, it is equally awesome that i get to say this with confidence although we’ve only been friends for a few months. i’m curious to see how my feelings about religion develop in the next semester. i am reminded to be vulnerable with my feelings because, as fellow domers, i feel we have an obligation to each other to be honest. i am eager to explore my academic interests more as i learn in the classroom, but also to learn as much or more from other students outside of the classroom. i’ve learned a lot from volunteering at the holy cross village retirement home and feel very fortunate. it motivates me to pursue my top goal of next semester, which is finding a professor that could hopefully guide me and be a menter of sorts. i am going to do research and reach out to a few professors who i share interests with and see if i can help them out with anything they need done. this is just the beginning and i am grateful for the opportunity to write about my experiences! see you next semester and have a great winter break! integration one boylan professor wagner moreau fye 15 october 2021 the life of aidan: pursuit of happiness, for me and for all root belief #1: i believe that i am searching for life-giving and fortifying relationships. in recent years, i’ve had some hit and miss friendships. i’d best describe those relationships as ones of moments. in the best moments, it was great to be together, laugh together, and enjoy each other. but in time apart from those moments, things are cold and sterile. i see how cold and manipulative they can be. how they can hurl insults at others in the name of causing chaos amongst other relationships. but the worst is when those insults and negative energy turned between us. at times, those relationships were my closest, therefore they knew a lot about me at both my highs and lows. so as they continue their cycle of spreading controversy, eventually, my stories found their way into their hate. as chimamanda adichie states in her ted talk: “to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me. the single-story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story” ("the danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). to hear my moments of vulnerability spread like some gossip was disheartening. the falsehoods that people are able to derive from this narrow point of view of my life caused me a lot of distress. but as i distanced myself and reflected, i noticed how that person operated. they only hoped to discuss negative things, talked about others behind their backs, and used others to get what they wanted, all signs of a toxic friendship according to olivia t. taylor ("5 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). therefore as i realized this, i also began to think about all i missed by being locked up in these toxic relationships. at the end of senior year, i had thankfully shifted my friend group and experienced some truly fulfilling friendships. however, we’re now separated by a thousand miles at our different universities. so now as i’m at my home for the next four years, i need to find new relationships which will help build me and others up. notre dame provides a unique opportunity. as father pete states: “all of us have come to this university community, a community that purposefully emphasizes educating heart and mind, living lives that zealously respond to the love of god that we find in the gospel and the life of jesus christ. a community that seeks on its best days to be a family and endure, with hope, the pain that we can at times cause one another” ("the role of faith in our story", by father peter m. mccormick moreau fye week three). we all applied to this university knowing how special this community is. the support expressed between one another, even between people that don’t know each other, will always make notre dame feel like home. so it really seems that i couldn’t have picked a better place to go out and discover those life-giving and fortifying relationships i had missed for most of my high school career. thankfully both experience and moreau have taught me what relationships to avoid and the warning signs associated with such while seeking new, and hopefully fulfilling, friendships. root belief #2: i believe that i am made to innovate and help create a better future as an engineering major, i strive to create solutions to the problems i see in the world around me. i constantly think about how i can fix the minor occurrences i see in a day. i want to fix a fan’s wobble, make a phone battery that lasts all day, and make shoes that keep their grip https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois longer. however, when reflecting on the impact of these minor inconveniences and comparing them to the scale of the problems we as a society face, i realize how i have to shift my problem-solving focus. as david brooks related in his ted talk about growth, “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses.” ("should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). while an adam i position would see me trying to improve the first world goods and services i’m accustomed to, and adam ii focus would implement my knowledge and resources to help build up others in this world. i need to adopt an adam ii focus to help solve the harsh reality that some people have to endure. i can use my skills to help create distillation plants to provide clean water, wind turbines to provide energy in remote areas, or even determine how to mass manufacture new medicines and vaccines. in adopting this adam ii position, i would be fulfilling father sorin’s vision for the effect of the university of notre dame: “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” ("sorin letter to moreau" by father edward sorin moreau fye week five). i believe that with my engineering degree, i will have the assets and tools to become a means of doing good towards the betterment of this world and could help develop a better future for all. core belief #3: i believe that i grow by embracing my vulnerability and openness to new concepts and ideologies i’d say that i typically have a fairly closed-off personality. i’m never the one to start up a conversation, if i don’t know someone well i won’t open up to them, and i typically avoid interactions if i can. all signs point to me being a decently introverted person in most walks of life. yet, when i actually engage with someone, i almost act like a sponge. i am always willing to read and or hear about another opinion or perspective on a subject or life. the issue is that https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view although i am open to most concepts, my fear of social interaction holds me back from growth. to quote brené brown’s ted talk, the power of vulnerability, “the more afraid we are, the more vulnerable we are, the more afraid we are” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). when i’m afraid to put myself in the spotlight and make mistakes, i’m essentially rejecting growth. however, if i embrace that vulnerability and recognize that mistakes are only human, i can listen to and reflect upon those new concepts and ideologies that i enjoy hearing. but what i have to remember is, as george ella lyon states, “you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start. let it flow. trust the work to find its own form.” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). so as i venture down this new life at a new school with new people, i just have to remember that i forge my own path. it’s up to me to reject my fears of being vulnerable. if i want to continue to grow as a person, i have to embrace my vulnerability in order to see and hear all the different perspectives and aspects of life that i want to hear. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html fye integration two a less extensive culmination of the encounterances that have been brought about via the quadrilateral second half of a narrative and cumulative course designed to evoke reflection and introspection on an individual’s moral and personal journey (alecotethbbavtqshoanaccdteraioaimapj) by mike scanlon the second half of moreau has truly altered my own perspective on life and specifically living at notre dame. i am not the same person i was when i arrived on campus in august, and weeks 9-12 have helped me reflect on where i have been, but also look forward to who i am becoming. throughout the three months i have now spent at notre dame, i have developed personally more than many of my years prior to domerfest. life at nd has changed my133 6 perspective on many of the events that occur in my daily life, and the few major events that occur on a less frequent basis. this semester has forced me to ask new questions about myself, my life, and how i choose to live it. back home, i often struggled with finding validation through other people in my life. i found that few truly understood me, and how best to show their affection to me in a way that didn’t leave me insecure about the true strength of our bond. i was scared to go to college. it took a small handful of people almost a decade to figure me out. how could i ever form meaningful relationships with a random roommate, and a campus full of strangers? i quickly learned that “when community is reduced to intimacy, our world shrinks to a vanishing point” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). thus, i have learned about the importance of not rushing into relationships. i’ve learned to take everything as it comes and not pressure myself and others into vulnerability and intimacy too quickly. my community at notre dame over the last few weeks has grown smaller, as is expected naturally after meeting so many people the first weeks. however, over the second half of the semester, i have truly begun to foster meaningful relationships with my friends. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ likewise, college living has forced me to enjoy my own company much more than i ever have. i used to think that eating alone at the dining hall was embarrassing, antisocial, and abnormal. however, i have quickly realized that sometimes, i would actually prefer to eat alone. i have carried this idea into other aspects of my life as well. i take regular trips to the grotto to reflect and collect my thoughts before exam week, or after a long week of classes. i use these times of solitude to remind myself that i shouldn’t be “letting [my] life be ruled by the expectations of others or [my] own expectation that [i] have to perfect” because i often find myself falling short of the grades i attained in high school ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). reflecting on this notion that perfection, especially in college, is virtually impossible, has allowed me to refocus on the goal at hand: receive an education from one of the most prestigious institutions in the world, and form a new home and community for myself while i do it. therefore, it was vitally important this semester that i learned to adapt to the assimilation of many cultures in one geographical location. thus, another difference i have found in how i live my life at school in contrast to how i lived before notre dame is that i am much more accepting and interested in the many perceptions of life that come with meeting people from different cultures. being from the northeast, i take things like snow for granted, but watching my friend from florida light up at the sight of the first snowfall of his life has reminded me that snow is not the only thing that people from different regions or backgrounds view differently from one another. i am becoming more aware of differing ideologies and am doing my best to use “more skill and wisdom in engaging those with other views” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john i. jenkins, csc moreau fye week ten). promoting inclusion, especially in the current political and socioeconomic climate of south bend https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ and the greater united states, is a skill that i have honed specifically in my time here at notre dame. another part of my home life which i have found to grow stronger here at school is my faith. i have always been religious. i’ve gone to mass every sunday for as long as i can remember. i’ve never missed christmas or easter mass either, but at notre dame, my religion isn’t just recognized and practiced on holy days of obligation. notre dame fosters a community which puts faith first, in word and in deed. i know that on my darkest days, my friends will pick me up, because god has placed them in my life to do so. likewise, on good days, my community is there to encourage me and show pride. in this manner, notre dame has shown me that “in both light and shadow,” the lord looks upon me, and this place, and guides me through my days ("hope holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king, csc moreau fye week twelve). i love that the theme for this integration is “encountering horizons”, because out of a lack of better words for what i have accomplished this semester, i think that is exactly what i have done. i originally thought that coming to notre dame would mean simply continuing my education and working towards a degree. i never would have thought that i would be introduced to so many opportunities outside of academics, and i especially never would have imagined finding out as much about myself as i have throughout this course. the last four weeks have encouraged me to reflect on how i think, feel, and behave when i encounter dissonance, brokenness, community, and hope, respectively. if we view each of these as a mountain in the distance, the horizon we encounter is quite a beautiful view. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/files/188847/download?download_frd=1 moreau integration 2 mlm moreau first year experience integration two assignment fall 2021 maria luisa montenegro encountering my warm feelings in cold indiana #1 i encountered dissonance with determination ● even though i feel like i’m at the right place and that i’m always doing my best, dissonance is a feeling that i’ve encountered constantly while in my first semester at notre dame. it is hard, i’m not gonna lie. coming from another country, leaving my family and traditions behind. adapting was a challenge and i felt like a fish out of water at times, but i’ve encountered this dissonance with determination to be open and make notre dame my home. i always tell myself: “you have talent. you are capable. you belong.” i took this quote out of an amazing ted talk our class watched for week 9 (“what is impostor syndrome and how you can combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). in fact, i feel like i really needed to watch that video (when i wrote the qqc and now at the end of the semester). i don’t really consider myself to have impostor syndrome, but sometimes i catch my mind thinking: “why am i here? i’m not as smart as the other students.” then, i stop and remember that i got here for a reason. even though i am not the best calc student, i have the power to change the world. it’s hard to think about myself in such a bright light, especially when nowadays this might be considered bragging, but it’s honestly the only way to get out of a dark spot give yourself the value you deserve. we need to step out of our expectations and appreciate all of our accomplishments. ok, that’s way easier said than done, but in order to feel in harmony with myself i need to free myself from expectations asking myself what do i actually want and like to do with my time. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo #2 i encountered brokenness with bravery ● i wish i could count how many times i felt broke; how many times my heart and soul were shredded into pieces. it is always the most devastating feeling. imagine studying for more than 12 hours on an economics test, and then failing. that moment when your blood pressure drops and you feel completely useless. quite literally like a broken piece of a broken plate. but then you have to heal, and this process is so hard. it takes a lot of bravery to recognize where your cracks are, picking up the pieces and working to glue them. after that, you will be left with scars, but those scars tell your unique story. those scars reflect your fights and they give you power. with all the struggles and flaws of our society, holding on to that will always make us love ourselves and stand out from the crowd. i have to say that i was so interested in the workshop where women find healing through kintsugi. (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto network moreau fye week ten) the way they turn our cracks and scars into beautiful art is just astonishing. on that note, i also pulled up this quote from president mcallister-wilson’s speech at the wesley theological seminary: “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action. hatred poisons everything.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by the national cathedral moreau fye week ten) in its essence, love is everything good and hate is everything bad. lately, in our society, hate has been growing everywhere, especially with social media and the infamous cancel culture popularity. people take their time and energy to judge, hate and be harmful towards others. they pick on diverse traits, imperfections or anything at all, and use this to destroy someone online and in real https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105073 life. we need to stay far away from society’s standard and embrace our brokenness with bravery while appreciating our scars and flaws. we are all different and that is beautiful! our journeys shape our beings. although no one likes to feel broken, i like to follow a saying from the 1 thessalonians 5:16-18 that reads “give thanks in all circumstances”. sometimes it is hard to understand what is happening at the time that it happens, but give thanks, because it will all make sense later. we are all different and that is beautiful! our journeys shape our beings. fun fact: i saw this saying on my way out of the hesburgh library when i was having a very tough week and it really inspired me. #3 i encountered community with courage ● before coming here i questioned how i would be able to integrate myself in the notre dame community. even though it is something so deeply recognized and appreciated worldwide, it just seemed intimidating for this little girl from brazil. now, one semester later, i ask myself how can i live without my notre dame family, and the answer is that i can’t. it took me a lot of courage to fully immerse myself in this community, but once i encountered my people, i didn't ever want to leave. from week 11 of moreau i selected this amazing quote from thirteen ways of looking at community: “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). it makes so much sense now, but for me in the beginning of the semester it wouldn’t be so accurate. my main goal was to build a community. it used to be so black and white for me: you go to college, look for people and make your community. now, i understand that it is something so organic that it is almost like a surprise gift. since i got here to notre dame it is what keeps me going is the family i built here. we all come from different places and bring diverse perspectives of the world to our routines, which is so enriching. again, i definitely agree with the previous quote because it’s not like we sat down and decided that we wanted to http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ build a diverse community with 5 asians, 4 latinos and 3 pocs. things just happen, and the deal is that you can’t have diversity in mind, you just need to understand that everyone is equal. also, as mentioned in the video diversity matters, when we think about diversity, what comes to mind is image, colors, representations, but it’s way more than that. (“diversity matters” by professor augustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven) that’s what we need to keep in mind while engaging with our community. let’s be courageous, be ourselves and receive the gift of community. #4 i encountered hope with happiness ● hope and faith always come together for me, and since i got into notre dame my relationship with god developed so much. we have to bring faith to all circles of our life. as mentioned in the “hope holy cross and christian education”: “we shall never forget that virtue, as bacon puts it, is the spice which preserves science. we shall always place education side by side with instruction; the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart. while we prepare useful citizens for society, we shall likewise do our utmost to prepare citizens for heaven.” (“holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve) education is never alone, for it to be valuable to our journey, it needs to be paired with faith, hope, and especially with our hearts. in my education journey, i do not want only to be prepared for the job market, but for a spiritual life as a citizen of god. there are multiple demons and obstacles in life that will try to take our hope away from us, but we shall always remember that god is by our side. for instance, when the weather started to get colder, the demon of depression and anxiety started to attack me. i began to feel lost, to feel worthless and especially my journey started to lose its meaning. even though i was lost way before that. i began to lose myself when 100% of my time was dedicated to academics and i was so systematic that i forgot to bring god to my journey. i needed help, and through various visits to the https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188305?module_item_id=105110 grotto and dorm masses, i realized that we should never let the negative sides of life take the best of us. let’s use our strengths from mind, heart, hope, church, and family, that we learned from holy cross, and keep them in the core of our souls. whenever the times are hard, we will have something to hold on to. our mind and heart have to be holding hands in our decision making process so we can finally encounter happiness. we shall hope that even though there are many difficulties in life, god has our best interests in mind. dear professor catherine, i would like to thank you deeply for this year. i honestly already miss moreau with you, and i’m so sad to say that our class time didn’t fit in my schedule for next semester. i had such a beautiful and intense journey with this class. i had no idea one university requirement would allow me to have such a join and encounter the best version of myself. thank you for being so kind, inspiring and an amazing educator. i had a lot of fun doing this assignment and it was a great way to wrap up our journey! you will always be remembered :) 11/19/2021 integration 2: the perilous quest of my mind i sometimes wonder what life would be like if i didn’t end up here at notre dame. i am always grateful that i get to experience this majestical place, with perfect grass, tall and extravagant buildings, and a welcoming and inclusive community. yet there is always part of me that wonders if i belong. i know i should belong, and i know i do, but when looking at all the other talented people around me i become a little daunted that i’m not as good as everyone else. i’m sure that i’m not the only one who experiences this, maybe others look up to me in the same way. this mindset is beneficial because it gives me a drive to compete with those whom i look up to, which motivates me to succeed. but i know that i cannot be my true self if i constantly try to live in the mirror of others and finding a middle ground has proved to be tricky these past few months. in her article “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” julia hogan asserts that “[many expectations we have of ourselves] are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life.” the expectations i set for myself are based on those around me: how they dress, how athletic they are, or how well they did on the last acids and bases test. part of developing as a student in college has helped me realize that this is not the only way to motivate me to work hard in classes, exercise, or stop playing games of clash royale because i keep losing. many things can be easily changed in life, but a mindset is not one of them. changing this view of life will require discovering myself through reflection and exploration, yet it will also require me to learn about the lives of others and gain insight into their mindset regarding introspection. after spending a few months at notre dame, i have been astounded by how kind everyone is to me, especially in my residence hall. i expected the upperclassmen to shun me and taunt me just like in high school, but everyone says hi to me in the halls, and my ra constantly checks in on me to see if how i am holding up. i never expected anything quite like it, and now i realize what the power of being kind can do for a community. in a commencement speech regarding hatred, father jenkins quoted augustine in his confessions, “it is strange that we should not realize that no enemy could be more dangerous to us than the hatred with which we hate him.” unfortunately, this is evident in our society today, where politics and radicalism have polarized our society into many different factions, resulting in hatred and verbal abuse unlike any we have ever seen. the prevalence of social media and internet platforms have contributed to this significantly, allowing people to threaten or ridicule anyone from anywhere behind an anonymous shield. but if the world was like notre dame, where hatred seems to be barely known, the world would be in a better place. this absence of hatred has allowed me to develop strong friendships that i didn’t know would be possible through games of ping pong and magic: the gathering, and it has given me a network of people whom i can rely on for class registration or studying advice, as well as others i can reach out to for spiritual guidance. this theme remains present in my classes as well, where i am surprised that in a class of 80 a professor knows my name, and is willing to help me to succeed. in his article “thirteen ways of looking at community,” parker palmer asserts that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” all notre dame students and faculty contribute to the development of the notre dame community. we all benefit from interaction with it, but we must also give back to the community by taking time to develop it so that new members can experience its benefits. moving forward, i know that i that i must fill the shoes of those who shared the kindness and love by returning the gesture and helping those who need it. i have sought to do this in a variety of ways, such as taking time to help my roommate with his calculus problems or even just sharing snacks with others in my hall. in short, i hope to have the same effect on the future classes that the upperclassmen had on me. there have been some points so far in my college journey where i have seriously doubted myself, such as two nights ago when i was studying for a big calculus exam. i doubted my abilities as a student, and i wondered if i would fail out of the class. it turns out i didn’t do that badly on the exam, but moments like these remind me that i am not alone in my despair, and there are other students who feel the exact same thing that i feel. in the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis, screwtape sends a letter to his nephew wormwood about how to turn souls away from god to the devil. he mentions that the souls are particularly vulnerable when they are weakened and when god “leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs—to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish.” everyone feels these moments sometimes, moments where the absence of god is felt, or feelings of loss, remorse, or despair. in moments like these, i must be able to step back and adopt a broader view of the situation. i must take time to pray and to realize how lucky i am to be attending one of the greatest universities in the world surrounded by the most welcoming individuals that i have ever met. i must convince myself that things get better because they always do, and that problems can be fixed and that change always happens. my accepting and flexible personality helps me to cope with these stresses of life, but when they get the better of me, i must learn to reflect and spend time with god so that screwtape doesn’t turn my soul to the devil. citations: (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit”by julia hogan, moreau fye week nine, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/) (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address”-by father john jenkins, c.s.c., moreau fye week ten, https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesleytheological-seminary-commencement/ ) (“thirteen ways of looking at community”by parker palmer, moreau fye week eleven, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ ) (the screwtape letters-by c.s. lewis, moreau fye week twelve, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 ) https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 microsoft word moreau week 8 integration.docx mcarthur 1 claire mcarthur professor ryan retartha moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 authenticity, compassion, and adventure my root beliefs are that i believe i forge life-giving giving relationships by being authentic, that my purpose is to love others, and that i grow by trying new things and stepping outside my comfort zone. my belief that i forge life-giving relationships by being authentic stems from my experiences during my sophomore year of high school. during this year, i felt very lonely. all my friends seemed fake, and i was fed up with the drama and facades of high school. i would go to the lunch table every day and not say a word – my “friends” never cared to ask about me, how my classes were going, or simply how i was doing. sophomore year was incredibly difficult, but it was followed by a summer serving at a younglife camp that showed me the power of authenticity and intentionality. i was surrounded by people who sincerely cared about me and were willing to engage with me in deep, life-giving conversations. serving at that summer camp inspired me to bring the lessons of authenticity and intentionality that i learned to my high school and life at home. after a long, stressful junior year, covid shut down everything. i was forced to be a leader in a time where i couldn’t even see the faces of those i was leading. relying on my love of intentionality and authenticity, i organized goodie bag drop-offs, socially distanced gatherings, and regularly checked in on my friends. even though it was an incredibly hard time, authentic and intentional relationships kept my soul feeling full. i learned that authentic relationships take a lot of work and time, but their rewards are priceless. the laetare medalist mcarthur 2 says, “there is only one you – your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage. no one can be you the way you can be” (2021 laetare medalist address – moreau week five). during my time at notre dame so far, i’ve especially realized the power of authenticity. when i’m not being my true self, i don’t surround myself with people who make me feel happy. when i am being my true self, i feel at home and am surrounded by people who make me incredibly happy and fulfilled. the only way i can find true, authentic friendships is to be my true, authentic self. brene brown said, “you cannot selectively numb emotion. when we numb the sad emotions, we numb joy, we numb gratitude, we numb happiness, and then we are miserable and looking for purpose and meaning” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown – moreau week one). i’ve also learned during these first few weeks of college that being my true, authentic self means embracing moments of sadness, loneliness, and happiness and expressing those feelings to friends. the only way to enjoy an authentic relationship is to let others know how you are truly doing. in doing this, i’ve been able to generate greater and deeper connections with my friends, letting them into my life. although it’s only october, i truly feel like i have friends that will be with me throughout the rest of college. looking forward to the rest of the year, i want to continue being my authentic self in all settings – the classroom, clubs, and more – because i know this is the only way in which i will find true friendship and community here at notre dame. i also believe that my purpose is to love others. my time serving at the younglife camp also emphasized to me the importance of loving others. although my sophomore year was characterized by fake friends, my time serving at camp led me to compassion for the girls who, just months earlier, i had been despising. i realized that the best way i could handle the situation was to extend compassion and love. they were most likely going through something that mcarthur 3 prompted them to act in the manner that they were. i removed myself from the situation, but remained pleasant and kind, knowing that my role was to simply love them and extend compassion and grace. other previous experiences have also emphasized to me the importance of loving others. this past summer, i struggled with realizing the reality of a toxic friendship. i had been friends with one girl since first grade. our families were best friends and we were practically sisters, but i realized that i was not being treated in the way i deserved. ultimately, the friendship ended, but at the end, i could only feel compassion for her and her home situation. i had to stand up for myself and my wellbeing, but i also simultaneously was able to feel compassion for what she was enduring. being able to express such love has been liberating for me, allowing me to get rid of grudges and simply move on. olivia t. taylor said, “the best friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor – moreau week four). although last summer i got rid of a toxic friendship, i also found five new life-giving friendships that made me incredibly happy. we hiked, adventured, and simply spent time together, which was extremely life-giving and fulfilling. i asked these friends how they were doing, how they felt about going to college soon, and more, knowing that the best way to love these new friends was to ask them about their life. david brooks said, “adam 1 asks how things work. adam 2 asks why we’re here. adam 1’s motto is success. adam 2’s motto is love, redemption, and return” (“should you live for your resume or eulogy” by david brooks – moreau week two). during the year, i find myself tending towards an adam 1 mindset, simply trying to get by and maintain good grades. however, recently i have been able to don an adam 2 mindset. i do prioritize grades and schoolwork, but i also prioritize time spent in community with others. focusing on an adam 2 mindset means emphasizing love and compassion, which has had amazing impacts. my time at mcarthur 4 notre dame so far has included prioritizing an adam 2 mindset and focusing on loving others. although i may not get along with everyone all the time, the way i can be my best self is by loving others and extending grace and compassion. lastly, i believe that i grow by trying new things and stepping outside of my comfort zone. when i first came to college, i had a lot of implicit biases that i picked up by living near seattle. everyone has implicit biases but learning more about what mine were have allowed me to branch out and try new things. chimamanda ngozi adichie said, “the single story robs a person’s dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau week 7). coming to notre dame, i encountered different people from many different backgrounds. but recognizing our equal humanity, our common dignity, has allowed me to be more open to new friendships and new experiences. people that i might not have befriended at home have become some of my closest friends, which has pushed me outside of my comfort zone, allowing me to grow. professor david fagerberg said, “god discloses himself, faith responds, and then we can see with new eyes … we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we need only to look around. he’s there and the dawning faith sees him everywhere” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg – moreau week three). being away from home, away from family, and away from friends, has also allowed me to see god’s presence in my life. i’ve found myself riding my bike around campus simply being so grateful to be at notre dame and to be beginning this new chapter. a year ago, i dreamed of being here, and seeing god at work in my life in getting gateway has been amazing. new experiences like sailing club, becoming a younglife leader, and more have pushed me outside of my comfort zone and allowed me to grow, enabling me to identify god’s work in my life as he enables me to take mcarthur 5 advantages of these new opportunities. as i continue this semester, i want to continue being open to new experiences and new friendships because i know doing this will allow me to grow. integration three an ode to how would bridget have wanted to be remembered? well, she thrived off the ability to make people laugh. there was never a dull moment when bridget would talk. she had a unique ability of keeping her friends grounded while also comforting and hyping them up. her sarcasm kept everyone on their toes, while also adding comedic relief when necessary. bridget always prided herself in not being surface level and creating meaningful relationships with all her friends. she was truly a woman who loved to make others feel loved. she always knew how to calm down a hectic situation and bring people back to a meditated state. she had that special effect on people and she built peoples trust because of that. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fyeweek one). everyone needs a stabilizer in their life and i know that bridget was the person for many people.   if bridget was nothing else she was definitely authentic. she never wanted to portray an image that she wasn’t proud of. she would say things even when her friends didn’t want to hear it, but she was always authentic with everyone. david brook posed the question, “should you live for your resume...or your eulogy?” (“hesburgh” by david brookmoreau fye week two). the short-minded answer would be your resume, monetary success, and a high executive position; however, bridget was never worried about her level of monetary success. all those things are rewarding; however, nothing is more rewarding than how people will remember you. bridget was also a great leader she always loved getting involved in leadership activities. she found such joy in bringing people together and providing them with a good example of how to lead. in high school, she was appointed to several leadership positions. in the end, it was not the title that rewarded her, it was the lessons she learned from everyone around her. an absence of joy can lead to failures in many different parts of your life. most importantly it leads to an absence of happiness. “joy always pushes us forward. it’s a impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open ones talents even more widely than one had before” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three). joy is the key to succeeding in life. if you don’t enjoy what you do and find joy in it you will not perform well. this works in many aspects of your life whether it is a school subject, a sport, or a job. if you hate the subject, you are learning in school you’re more likely to be unmotivated to successfully complete an assignment or do well on the homework’s or exams. if you do not enjoy the sport, you are playing you will dread going to practice and feel as if it is a waste of time. lastly, if you don’t enjoy your job, you are less likely to succeed at the task at hand. as the quote states, joy pushes us forward, and motivates us to do more. if you enjoy what you are doing it will bring you joy and therefore further succeed in life. a life without joy is undeniably hard. however, when you find the thing that brings you the most joy take it and run with it. bridget always made a conceited effort to place her own happiness in the center of her life. bridget always was passionate about whatever she started. if she began a task, she would always make sure to complete it with the utmost effort. sure, there would be times when she didn’t want to finish what she started but one thing bridget wasn’t was a quitter. the only way you will ever find true happiness is if you love what you do. bridget was a brave example of how you can chase your dreams and maybe it wasn’t the kosher route, but it was what she gravitated towards the most. this came into play when she got a job out of college. she worked in sports with a very low paying salary but she went to work every day and loved what she did. she would always remind her miserable finance friends that it is vital that you remain openminded to changing a career path even if it is hard to do. at the end of the day you are going to be most successful doing what you love. “there are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much right off the bat” ("navigating your career path" by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). she always reminded people that it was never too late to chase your childhood dreams! she would always tell us to channel our inner kid and live life freely. she was never a proponent of the cookie cutter life track she always liked keeping life interesting. bridget always valued her family. she would always say her siblings and parents were her biggest inspirations. they always encouraged her to be her most authentic self. they embraced her laughter and jokes even if they were at their expense. “she was always the light in our life making us laugh until our belly’s hurt”, said her sister. bridget gushed about the love she had for her parents. when i started to think about who knew her best and had seen her live out her full potential the first two people, i thought of were her parents. they’ve seen her grow, struggle, and succeed in everything she’s have done. when i asked them the first question, what do you think she most valued and desired in life they quickly said, “the ability to make people laugh.” i smiled when i heard that answer, i said to myself, “yes, that is bridget, that’s her.” as a kid people would never see her without a smile on her face. her mom recalled her walking through the supermarket and waving and smiling to every person she saw. (reflectionmoreau fye week 5). bridget never faced extreme adversity, but when she was faced with a bump in the road she knew how to tackle the issue. “when hard things happen to us we often focus on the things we don’t have” ("5 minutes" by aria swarrmoreau fye week six). humans often have a narrow-minded view on life and its hardships. when we are faced with challenges, we are put to the test on how we will react. god puts certain obstacles in your life so you can persevere through them. instead of looking for the bad in the situation you can be grateful for what you still have. in order to live your life well you must overcome these obstacles and respond in a positive manner. although the positivity will not always come right away, bad situations help you appreciate what you have so much more. suffering often makes us stronger. once we can persevere through something hard, the other minor issues seem irrelevant. struggles put everything into perspective and help to pinpoint what is essential in life. when i was writing this part of the eulogy, i struck inspiration from greg boyle. i thought of judgement and how it is so easy to make quick judgments of people and trust me everyone has their fair share of judgements. bridget was not perfect in this was she would judge people unrightfully so, but then again who doesn’t? “sometimes we strike the high moral distance of judgement—moving our protected jurisdiction far from each other” ("jurisdiction" by greg boylemoreau fye week seven). greg boyle is a very inspirational man. he believes that even if he can’t change everyone, he can still make a small impact. he chose to focus on a very specific task that he wanted to accomplish. he wanted to make a difference in people’s lives; specifically, gang members. not many people would be brave enough to go face to face with the head of a gang and tell him that you “didn’t like the way they were talking.” he has gained the respect of large groups of gang members through los angeles. greg boyle had dedicated his life to changing other people’s lives. he goes to work every day in hope that he can change at least one gang members perspective. he is a true inspiration to people all around the world. and although bridget didn’t make the impact greg boyle did she always went out of her way to make people feel special and she never gave up on someone when they were struggling. moreau integration #1 pdf professor pruitt moreau fye integration #1` 15 october 2021 putting it in perspective going to notre dame is perhaps not only the greatest achievement of my lifetime but one of the biggest blessings. i have already met amazing friends and done well in many of my classes. however, such an distinguished oppourtunity and a complete change of every aspect of my life has not come without its challenges. i am lucky that i am grown immensely in confidence and independence throughout the past couple years of high school, yet i too have struggled. it is hard to put a finger on exactly what i believe because i think college is the time to figure that out. that being said, i have certain root beliefs that serve as reminders to me to keep a healthy positive outlook on my life throughout the transition to college. i believe that comparison is the thief of joy. this is not a belief nor even a thought unique to me.  this famous quote, “comparison is the thief of joy” has been attributed to mark twain, theodore roosevelt, and others.  my mother was the one who introduced it to me and frequently continues to remind me of it. coming to notre dame, everyone around you is talented, smart, or accomplished in some way.  kids go from being the top of their class and the person who was most involved in everything to an environment where everyone is comparably the same way.  i hear people discuss imposter syndrome, a feeling that you are the one who isn’t worthy or capable enough to be here at such a prestigious, amazing school.  to some extent i feel that way.  it is hard to go from being told you’re the best to struggling at the highest level.   in week two of moreau, david brooks gave a ted talk about human nature in which he used the example of two adams – adam i, the ambitious external side of man, and adam ii, the humble internal side.  during his lecture he says, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two)  if i was asked what truly matters in life, i would say love for others – my family and friends.  however i feel so often that the world around us defines our worth in terms of success.  especially at notre dame where there are such high stakes and people have been very focused on academic achievement their whole lives, it is very easy to put too much of one’s self worth in “success.” the confrontation between external success and internal value is a prevalent one. as i have struggled in school, perhaps for the first time in my life, i try to remember that people’s worth does not come from their work alone. we are all here because we have had success. but more importantly, we should not compared our success, because we are all worthy. we are worthy to be a notre dame and we are worthy as individual people, regardless of how much external success we show to the world. it is only when we stop comparing ourselves to other and feeling not good enough that we can find true joy in what we have already accomplished. i believe that who we form relationships with reflects ourselves. i have been fortunate to grow up in a loving family with a stable household and parents who respect each other and taught me to do the same to others. my relationships are the most important thing in my life. in week six of moreau, i began my “where i’m from” poem by talking about my family, friends, and the places i lived growing up. i talked about “walks with my mom and a stroller to the park and finally biking to the beach once i was old enough” (where i’m from poem by moreau fye week six). these relationships and memories are the people who have changed my perspective, taught me many lessons, and shared in my greatest memories. when i had to leave home to come to college, i was devastated. i thought i would never find friends anywhere close to the ones i had made in high school. although i am a pretty independent person in terms of taking care of myself, i depend a lot on my friends for emotional support. in week four of moreau, we discussed what makes a healthy relationship and how to better seek them out. an article from the grotto defines that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often, we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). although i eventually found incredible, supportive friends, for many years in high school i was in a very toxic friendship with a girl who i thought was my best friend. her actions hurt me, but that relationship also taught me so many lessons and gave me the knowledge of how to recognize toxic traits in the future. i didn’t like certain things about myself when i was friends with her. i felt like i was move involved in drama. she made me feel weak like i couldn’t stand up for myself. because i think that the people we are in relationships with reflect our own traits, i eventually cut off the friendship because i didn’t like the person i was in that relationship, it wasn’t a true representation of myself. during class, many of my classmates expressed similar experiences with toxic friends and concern about how to form the best relationships as we move throughout college. in response, i think the best advice is to see if a relationship is making you a better person and bringing out your best traits instead of your worst. because of my experience in the past, i feel better equipped to make healthy relationships with people that share admirable aspects of my character because i know i deserve more than a toxic friend. there is an additional challenge besides potential toxicity that comes with friendships during freshman year of college: insecurity. knowing that i was going to be meeting an entire new community for the first time, i wondered what they were going to think of my personality, the way i dressed, and the things i care about. in week one of moreau, i watched a video of brené brown giving a ted talk on the necessity of vulnerability to our lives. within the video she says, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to do . . . for connection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). by “they” she means people seeking relationships — such as myself coming to college. i love the person i am, but it was nerve wracking to wonder if others will feel the same. however, as most college freshman have to do eventually, i put myself out there. i asked people to get lunch at the dining hall, i talked and laughed with other girls’ late at night in my dorm, i said yes to going out, and i asked a new guy to my syr. all of these things might not have been the easiest, but looking back on the past few weeks, i am proud of myself. because i was brave and vulnerable with my personality and my emotions, i have found such a great group of friends already. some of these girls are a lot like me and some are different. however i feel that they all reflect me in a way because we were willing to put ourselves out there and therefore found friendship in each other. as i continue to meet new people in college, i feel less worried about what will happen because i know that being genuine and brave is all one can do. the rest will come with time. in this world, i think you attract people who are similar to you. similarity or at least relatability is often the base for a friendship. although it is nowhere near the most diverse college, notre dame is a lot more diverse than my high school was. i have found it so beautiful to connect with so many people who are seemingly different from me — whether that’s a different background, religion, or race — and find shared passions and common ground. i finished my “where i’m from” poem with the words, “i am from textbook readings and walking ten miles everyday more work than you could ever imagine; treasuring saturday and dreading sunday; no sleep but the best memories; [and] running out of green clothes. now i am from notre dame” (where i’m from poem by moreau fye week six). i believe that the key to success and thriving is remembering that perfection is not the goal. similar to the habit of comparison is my personal propensity for perfection. i have been quite the perfectionist my entire life. perhaps this is a result of growing up the oldest child of four where i wanted to be the one who wasn’t a burden to my parents and an example for my sisters. but honestly, i think its just the way i am. i’ve moved through life thinking that there was some attainable goal of the ideal me where if i could just do this one thing exactly right and fix this one problem i would be completely happy. i’ve come to realize that is not a reasonable way to think. in week seven of moreau i watched chimamanda adichie give a ted talk about the danger of a single story. in her discussion she says, “all of these stories make me who i am. but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and overlook the many other stories that formed me” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). by this she is mostly referring to the implicit bias so present in our society and how we cannot truly have an objective opinion on anyone or their culture without hearing multiple stories to complete the picture. however, i find this quote relates so much to the constant strife for perfection. by focusing on the negative aspects — or stories — in my life that i wish to fix, i overlook that i am actually a make up of many different amazing things. some qualities may be better than others, but the imperfection and jumble of all the things that i am — confident, smart, stubborn, empathic, sometimes a little obnoxious — is what makes me unique and that is beautiful. in the same way, by focusing on the negative aspects of my college experience — the same food everyday, the fact that i hit my head on the ceiling every morning — i am overlooking everything i have been blessed with here such as a great community in my dorm and an education that will last a lifetime. in week three of moreau, i watched a video in which father pete discusses knots we encounter in our lives. he talks about trying to untie a shoelace and as soon as you get one knot untied you encounter another. this metaphor feels a lot like college. as soon as i compete one assignment, there is another waiting for me. as soon as i get one good exam grade back, i receive another grade where i did not do as well as i thought. within the video he says that “what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick c.s.c. moreau fye week three). to me, this is a very important reminder that trying to solve every problem at once is not sustainable. in a few years, it won’t matter how i did on every assignment, what will matter was the person i became in college. that person will likely be nowhere near perfect, but i hope that she will be genuine. as i respond to additional challenges throughout college i hope to keep this quote in mind, and remember that being a kind and hardworking person overall is much more important than each individual problem. in her address to the graduating class of 2021, carla harris, winner of the laetare medal, said to “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). when you’re a perfectionist, even a minor inconvenience and failure can feel like the end of the world. i have been trying to take ms. harris’ advice and look at these disappointments from the perspective of lessons. at notre dame where it seems that many people are the best at what they do — whether that’s service, academics, or athletics — they aren’t perfect. perfection isn’t an attainable goal to strive for because there is no such thing. confronting this habit of perfectionism is a process, but it has been comforting to know through class discussions and personal conversations that many of my peers feel the same way. every setback i face here is not the end of the world. every relationship i cultivate may or may not be permanent, but i hope that the ones that are permanent reflect my character in a positive way. by remembering to trust myself and putting my relationships and accomplishments in perspective, i know i can continue to be happy here at notre dame. integration 2 james demaro professor drew espeseth moreau first year studies 30 november 2021 the struggles of a freshman adjusting to college is full of many high and lows. while most people have become used to the daily routine of attending classes, taking midterms, and writing papers, it is impossible to say that anyone has fully adjusted. when a student leaves his home to attend university, he or she begins a completely new life. we leave behind our friends and family and are thrown into a completely new environment. while i have begun this adjustment process over the course of my first semester, i have asked myself many questions. how can i cope with leaving behind my lifelong friends? how can i become an important part of the new community around me? and finally, how do i cope with failure? weeks 9 to 12 have helped me in the process of adjusting to this new step of my life by offering advice and even bringing attention to these new questions. through the instruction of the moreau program at notre dame, i have become aware of my surroundings in regards to community, learned how to adjust to my new environment, and learned how to prevail in the face of failure. one of the hardest parts of adjusting to college is leaving behind your friends and making new ones. harder even still is the fact that new students often find themselves comparing their experiences to others on social media. while this process may be extremely difficult, emery bergmann, a student at cornell university, shares her difficult experiences in an effort to help incoming freshmen. bergmann offers her solution saying, “i had to minimize my time on social media. it became a platform for comparison. i evaluated every picture my friends posted, determining whether their college looked like more fun than mine, if they had made more friends than i had, just meaningless justifications for my unhappiness” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine.) within my own adjustment process, this has been one of the most difficult adjustments that i have had to make. during the beginning of my college experience, i often found myself comparing my experiences to others and thinking that my school just wasn’t as fun. this really hurt, because i felt as if i had worked so hard for this and i wasn’t having as good a time as other people. bergmann helps to shed light on this problem by letting students know that everyone is going through this. as i began to limit my social media usage, i found myself comfortable at notre dame, and i began to enjoy myself even more. when i wasn’t comparing my experiences to others, i started to love mine even more. while i still have a long way to go on limiting my social media usage, i have grown to love and accept notre dame as my home. when a student leaves his home for college, they are dropped into a completely new environment. and with this new environment comes a new community. within week 11, parker j. palmer explores how to find community within our lives. palmer argues that, “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as “a capacity for connectedness”—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven.) in order to properly find community in our lives, we must have an internal movement within our hearts. during the black lives movement, i made an effort to discover what was the key to building community. after reading the book “tattoos on the heart” by https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ father greg boyle,” i learned that we must first break down the barriers that separate us within our hearts. in order to break down these barriers, we must learn about other people and then come to know them. one of the largest barriers to building community is systemic racism (as we have seen in the past few years.) christopher devron speaks on the commonplace nature of these barriers saying, “by the standards of john paul ii and francis, we can identify examples of structural or systemic racism throughout society at large” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devron moreau fye week ten.) i grew up on long island where racial injustice really isn’t a huge problem that we face. nonetheless, during recent years i have taken it upon myself to become educated on social injustices that african americans face. for my eagle scout project, i constructed a library in a temporary men’s homeless shelter. instead of just collecting books for them to read, i filled the library with the works of many prominent african american and south american authors (these were the dominant ethnicities of the residents.) by encountering the residents of the homeless shelter i was able to establish community with them by breaking down the barriers that separated us. failure is part of any college experience and learning how to properly deal with that failure can be a difficult process. father james king offers up the idea that only christ can save us and give us hope saying, “it was for moreau “a treasure more valuable than gold and precious stones.” (cl, 34) in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope” (“hopeholy cross and christian education” by father james king moreau fye week twelve.) while it is true that jesus can be our guiding light in terms of hardship, i don’t believe that we should place all of our trust in him and take no action ourselves. in my accounting class, we had an extremely difficult exam. after taking the test i even called my mother to say that i didn’t think i belonged at notre dame and that i would be dropping out of the school of https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ business. after a little moment of panic, i decided that i would begin to work harder in order to achieve the grades that i wanted. and that’s what i began to do. even though i had the flu the week before our next exam, i worked hard to understand the material, met with my professor, and completed practice tests. my results on this test were much more promising than the previous test and i felt accomplished in myself. while the transition to college can be extremely difficult, it’s a learning process for everyone. things that we have believed our whole lives can be turned down in a second. regardless of the difficulties, it’s important that we reach out to others, because everyone has gone through it. week 8 integration one riley 1 kiara riley professor retartha moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 the importance of vulnerability in establishing forever relationships i believe that one needs to be vulnerable in order to create forever relationships with others and find his or her genuine friends. this belief, although difficult to follow at first, has helped me tremendously throughout my freshman year in college so far. even in high school, being vulnerable with others has always been a difficult task for me, and moving to another state to begin my independent journey as a freshman college student made the process even more challenging. vulnerability, as discussed in week one, is a very important step in finding one’s genuine friendships. i intentionally ignored this important step in the beginning of the year when first attempting to make friends. i, instead, behaved in a certain manner to blend in with my peers because i was too scared that if i expressed my true self i would be left without any friends. i remember thinking that i would rather have friends who don’t genuinely know me on a deep level than not have friends at all. as the weeks progressed, i felt very lost and continuously kept comparing my new college friends to my best friends back at home. at this time period in the semester, i was at a very low point. as david brooks explains in his ted talk, it is important to lose yourself and get to a really low point in order to grow into your most authentic self. he stated in his speech, “in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). brooks’ belief that one needs to lose his or herself in order to find his or herself really resonated with me because it was so applicable with my life at that time. i, as previously mentioned, was at a low point in my life and knew that in order to grow into my most authentic self, i needed to change my mindset in regards to finding friends because i lacked deep and meaningful relationships in my life. having these connections is so important to me and they are what keep me grounded. being at rock bottom encouraged me to gain riley 2 the strength and courage to alter the way i seek potential friends and the way i express myself to these potential friends as well. growing up in a very catholic and faithful household, there was a large emphasis on the importance of having meaningful relationships with people in life, for these are the people who will be there for you when you need support. my faith helped me during this low period because i found myself putting my stress and worries regarding my social life in god’s hands. i used my anxious thoughts as an opportunity to create a more powerful relationship with him and to strengthen my overall faith. this definitely helped ease my stress, because i realized that god controls my fate and that he has a plan for me. father pete mccormick discusses this idea of god being everywhere and will be there for anyone who needs guidance in his video: “we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we only need to look around. he’s there, and the dawning faith sees him everywhere” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick moreau fye week three). watching this video reassured me that everything will work out in the end if i trust that god is there looking over me. keeping this in mind, i went back into reality with a different mindset in regards to vulnerability. week four of moreau directly aligned with my goal of being more vulnerable with my peers to find “life-giving relationships.” i began to search for potential friends who i felt were genuinely interested in what i have to say and offer to conversations. the individuals who paid attention to me and made me feel comfortable with expressing my true personality were the ones i naturally gravitated towards. once i felt comfortable being my genuine self around these individuals, i began to be more vulnerable with them and began to share stories from my past that caused me to have my wall up in the first place. olivia t. taylor discusses the importance of attention in regards to friendship in her article: “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). attention, as taylor mentions, is a form of love. all genuine riley 3 friendships are formed on the basis of trust and love, and paying pure attention to another individual shows the care that individual has for him/her. when i was on my journey of finding friends, i kept this in mind and looked for those who would pay attention when i had something to contribute to the conversation and would also not speak over me. those who would simply listen to me when i went out of my comfort zone and attempted to be vulnerable and express my true personality are the ones i knew would be my real friends and accept me for who i am. later on in my journey of making meaningful friendships, i began to share stories about my upbringing to the individuals who made me feel comfortable and safe opening up. as previously stated, i was raised in a very catholic household, and a large part of my upbringing was my parents’ encouragement to always be compassionate to others and treat others how i want to be treated. i shared this part of my childhood and other past stories with my new friends, because i felt as if the next step towards my goal in forcing myself to be more vulnerable was sharing personal stories from my past. sharing these stories, as discussed in week five of moreau, helped shape my journey of finding genuine long-lasting friendships because i looked for those who would appreciate me sharing stories from my past. a large part of my journey in finding genuine friends was reflecting on what and who have formed me into the girl i am today. writing the “where i’m from” poem allowed me to acknowledge and express my gratitude towards the individuals and places that helped me get to where i am today. the majority of my poem is written about my old home that was knocked down years ago. this place meant a lot to me and was unfortunately removed so we could rebuild a new home on top of it. when i think about where i am from, that is the place i think of, not the new home. all of my childhood memories were made in this old home. the ironic aspect is that the statements i made in my poem put me in a very vulnerable position, which is something i have been trying to work on. i included a line about my older riley 4 sister who suffers from extreme anxiety. i have not shared this yet with either my new friends in college or the ones back at home. i believe that writing about these vulnerable parts of myself and my life in this poem is the first step in me becoming verbally vulnerable with the people around me. my belief that being vulnerable is necessary in order to create forever relationships with others and to find genuine friends greatly influences my actions. i am more careful about what i say to people because i want everything that leaves my mouth to be an accurate reflection of my true self and of my moral character. as discussed in week seven of moreau, pursuing the truth and not being stereotypical is important in finding and being my true authentic self. thinking before i speak will remove the implicit bias and stereotypical thoughts about individuals around me from my mind. the removal of these thoughts will allow me to put aside these stereotypes and look for friends who will allow me to express my true self and who i know i will feel comfortable around. at this point in my first semester, i have an amazing and supportive group of friends. the hole in my life when i was at rock bottom and very alone in the beginning of the year is now filled with deep and meaningful friendships that allow me to feel comfortable expressing my genuine self and sharing my past. i am so lucky and thankful to have these individuals in my life, and my college experience would not nearly be the same without them. i am going to continue to grow in the future in being vulnerable with others and challenge myself to be more open with my peers earlier on. if i was more vulnerable in the beginning of the year with my peers, i would never have gotten to that low and lonely point in my life. in the future, i plan to no longer be closed off with people because i have seen and experienced it first hand, and it prevents me from finding these deep friendships that i absolutely need in my life. challenges and hope challenges and hope as i get older, i reflect on how i have changed throughout the course of my life. new challenges arise, and i come to struggle with different things. with the passage of time, i have grown in self-awareness; i reflect on my past and on who i hope to be in the future. i believe that i am made to grow in relationship with god. ever since i came to embrace the catholic faith a few years ago, i have learned more about god, the traditions of the catholic faith, and how my belief in god should shape my life. ultimately, as leon bloy remarked, “the only real sadness, the only real failure, the only great tragedy in life, is not to become a saint.” often, i feel like ryan, a former undergraduate: that in my spiritual life, i “take step after step, only to return again and again to the same points on a circle” (student reflections on faith by campus ministry moreau fye week three). however, god loves me and does not want me to lose hope--he wants me to grow in holiness. one way for me to obey god is through the service of those around me. i believe that i am meant to serve others. in the gospel of matthew, the lord imparted the importance of serving others, proclaiming that “whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.” before coming here, i enjoyed volunteering in texas, especially for an organization that provided free math tutoring, and i hope to volunteer often here as well. though conditions were difficult, father sorrin served others in america and he wrote that he “love[d] the work of the brothers” (letter to bl. basil moreau by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). like members of the congregation of holy cross, men and women in catholic religious orders across the world have demonstrated what it means to serve sacrifically. moreover, i should take the notion that my brain “notic[es] patterns and makes generalizations'” into account, as sometimes what i think about others is not accurate, and this may close me off having a friendship with them (how to think about ‘implicit bias’ by keith payne, laura https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/191908?wrap=1 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). also, through the notre dame right to life group, i have participated in activities to emphasize the dignity of all human life. jesus spent his public ministry in humble service of his creation, and the gospels are full of his miraculous acts and mercy towards sinners, and i am meant to imitate him. i believe that i am searching for greater peace. george ella lyon writes that the where i’m from “poem as a writing prompt has traveled in amazing ways” and she mentions the groups for which it has made a difference, such as for refugees (where i’m from by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). writing my own where i’m from poem helped me reflect on what has been significant throughout my life. also, coming to college has been a large transition. these first 56 days since i arrived here have been filled with uncertainty, tears, and doubts. brene brown remarks that “for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen” (the power of vulnerability by brene brown moreau fye week one). since i have been here, there have been times that i have felt homesick and lonely; additionally, i have not yet forged many deep relationships with others by being vulnerable. friends who truly care about me and know who i am will help me, and conversations with them could help me to reflect on life. as olivia t. taylor writes, “great, fruitful conversation comes from two people engaging in one another’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). by thoughtfully engaging with others, i can develop meaningful friendships that will support me; intentionally forming friendships is something for me to focus on. additionally, i have struggled with my own faults and finding myself in “ a sort of mediocrity where [i] realize there’s a difference between [my] desired self and [my actual] self” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy by david brooks moreau fye week two). i know that there is a gap between who i am now and who i want to be. through more http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/brene_brown_the_power_of_vulnerability/transcript?language=en https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/modules/items/108914 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim spiritual direction and prayer (in addition to the more efficient management of my time), i can grow closer to who i want to be. also, i have experienced satisfaction, joy, and hope since i arrived here. i have enjoyed god’s beatiful gift of creation through runs on campus. i have enjoyed working with a group of students in the student policy network club. i have been encouraged by the example of other students who are strong in their faith and who spread joy to those around them. i know that going deeper in prayer and growing in my relationship with god will lead me to the deep peace that my heart is longing for. i hope that i will find a good life balance soon. i hope that i will continue to grow in holiness and overcome my flaws. i hope that i will come to serve others more meaningfully. there are many opportunities to grow in my catholic faith here. in the magnificat of mary (who is the namesake of this university, and the humble handmaiden of god), she proclaims that “[her] soul proclaims the greatness of the lord, [her] spirit rejoices in god [her] savior.” she trusted god through uncertain situations and serves as an example to preserve in prayer. i believe that by both living out the truths of the catholic faith and by serving others, i can grow closer to god. i also believe that i am searching for deeper peace, which i can find as my relationship with god deepens and as i acclimate to growing up and the transition to college. toby bradshaw professor taylor moreau first-year experience 13 october 2021 the people and experiences that made me who i am similar to the idea of tabula raza, i believe that i am a sum of my experiences. what i have done, who i have met, and what i have experienced have shaped me into the person that i am today. however, as david brooks said, “in order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. and in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau first year experience week two). i think that my time so far at notre dame has helped me get a clearer grasp of who i am and what i like or dislike. knowing these things about myself from before has really helped me step out of my comfort zone and pursue new experiences in college. however, i believe that it is important to not forget my core beliefs, the things that make me who i am. because of this, it is important for me to remember my roots and where i came from. after all, those things helped shape my values today. i believe that i’m very lucky to be so loved and supported in my family. the first time that i really felt like a sense of belonging like that was in the cross country team in high school. this framework that built me up, made me who i am today, and helped me achieve the things i have. my upbringing helped me develop my core values and personality in a way that made me think about what i want to get out of my life. my experiences as a child helped me build my values of creativity and humor that were highlighted in my personality test. furthermore, my time on the cross country team helped me solidify my values and beliefs of hard work, grit, and determination. this was all due to the people that made me who i am today. truly nothing will really match the complete, unconditional love that comes from your family but on the team, especially as an upperclassmen, i felt truly appreciated and involved in the entire group, as a leader, a teammate, and a friend. i have felt like this with other friend groups, but never as completely as with my running friends. i believe that the community i forge here at notre dame should share the same important characteristics that my relationships in my family and my team shared: support, trust, and community. these beliefs have been tested by the various false relationships and fake friendships i have had across my life. although i have made some mistakes and i am sure to make more, those mistakes have ultimately only strengthened my idea of what i believe a good relationship is and who can best help me grow as a person. in both my family and the team, we supported eachother no matter what our differences were and that gave us a strong bond against critics. at school, people even joked that the cross country team was a cult based on how close we were. i think that this supporting framework of support is integral for becoming the best version of myself. as brene brown said, truly happy people “had the passion to be kind to themselves and to others because as it turns out we can’t practice compassion with others if we can’t treat ourselves kindly. and also they had connections - and this is the hard part - as a result of authenticity. they let go of who they thought they should be, in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau first year experience week one). i think that knowing i am among people who will support me no matter what will help me to be vulnerable. that being said, i do not want to simply use others for what they can give me. as the video by one love foundation pointed out, abusive relationships like that simply are not what love is. i believe in self confidence and fulfillment but not at the expense of others. as dr. david fagerberg, author of “faith brings light to the dark world” points out, “ there is such a thing as a healthy ego, but we’re talking here about egocentricity, an unhealthy sort of self-love that flatters us with the idea that everything in the world revolves around us” (“ faith brings light to the dark world” by dr. david fagerberg moreau first year experience week three ). i believe that it is important for me to support others and give back what they have given to me. furthermore, i believe that because of what everyone has given me, it is important that i pay all of blessings forward to others. i believe that i can forge life giving relationships by doing for others what i have been so blessed with myself. my background in faith and various people in my life such as my parents, art teacher, and cross country coach have taught me that. that belief has not been shaken much because i think that it is so important to who i am. i believe that by learning more about myself and others, i will be able to better understand how to help others. furthermore, in order to understand god’s will and what he wants for me, i must explore my faith further. i believe that my experiences at notre dame will help shape this experience. as our very own fr. kevin grove said, “faith and reason together put us always in communion with one another” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau first year experience week five). in order to pursue this value of helping others, i think that it is important to get outside of my bubble and learn about the struggles of others. for example, placing myself in other people’s shoes has helped me understand more about implicit bias and other issues in the world. as i learned in this class, “ many of us are more biased than we realize. and that is an important cause of injustice—whether you know it or not” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau first year experience week seven). this opened my eyes to more of the struggles of others. ultimately, while many people and factors have shaped my beliefs, it is up to me now to do my best to honor them with the person i have become and the choices i make. i hope to use my time here at notre dame to continue living what they have given me, learning more, and pursuing my faith. through this, i will be able to strengthen my beliefs and become the best version of myself. untitled document william peeler defining myself for myself i believe that everyone deserves a second chance. i believe that you should ask for help almost daily. i believe that there is no such thing as unconditional love. finally, i believe that the taoists are right in saying that there is no way to communicate without losing meaning. let's work from the top; i am not afraid to admit that i am not a fan of the person i used to be. then again, who is? i was going through an awful time my freshman year in high school between a few dead relatives, being away from home for the first time, and a suicidal best friend: a surprisingly common american combination. i dealt with these issues by lashing out at people around me. i know i was unpleasant to be around, and, despite that, there was one person who kept reaching out to me and who helped me get back on my feet. everyone deserves a second chance, no matter how unpleasant they are, because you never know what someone is going through. brené brown said that “when you ask people about connection, the stories they told me were about disconnection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) and i think that that's because people find connection in their weakest moments. that connection can be hard to make, because, in the words of david brooks, “we live in a society that highlights adam 1, and often neglects adam 2” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) and a world of adam 2 doesn’t reward or highlight the vulnerability required to ask for help or receive it. think about how often you help others, about how willing you’d be to do something small if a friend asked, and now consider how nice it is to be able to help someone who has asked for it. i believe that you should ask for help whenever you need it, as the times in my life when i have readily asked for help have been the times where i struggled the least. one of the other benefits of openly asking friends and partners for help is that it helps keep you honest and involved with each other. there is no such thing as unconditional love; if you ever stop helping each other, looking out for each other, or generally putting in effort to make each other happy, then that’s not a ‘life-giving relationship’. when actions start being justified with ‘because i love you’ (“because i love you” by that’s not love campaign moreau fye week four) and ‘unconditional love’ is brought up as a way to get out of putting in work, then that relationship is no longer healthy and that is a condition under which it should end. i spent more time than i would have liked in a relationship where i heard both of those phrases repeatedly, and i wish this was something that i had realized sooner. the last belief is a big one, and it's a bit hard to articulate in the remaining five-hundred words. in taoism (or most eastern practices, for that matter) it is said that there is a difference between absolute and relative reality. essentially, an apple on the table is absolute reality; it holds every part of its being just by sitting there. our experience of the apple is relative, as we can only see and understand some aspects of it; we can’t know the exact weight, the imperfections inside, ect.. the least absolute of realities lies in communication, because communication takes our already approximate knowledge and approximates it further by cutting out ‘unnecessary’ details. i find this idea central to my way of thinking; it is probably the biggest reason that i can’t follow any organized religion. most religions, especially western ones, seek to prescribe faith in some manner, to explain how one should pray and show reverence. i am reminded of a friend i have here at notre dame who was called out by her teacher mid math class for not clasping her hands while praying for a god she hadn’t worshipped in a decade. in the words of david fagerberg, “spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). often, organized practice seeks to guide how we see and approach spirituality, and as such seeks to define the deepest parts of absolute reality with relative description. on top of that, those who prescribe this spirituality are not immune to things such as implicit bias, as “most individuals are implicitly biased even if they do not think of themselves as prejudiced” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne moreau fye week seven). i have experienced this first hand, hearing homophobic remarks from religious officials preaching to a crowd that internalizes their word as what should define spirituality. i attempted to join a worship band here on campus for the musical experience, but i ended up leaving after memories of past experiences with bigoted priests kept making me uncomfortable when familiar passages would come up. the question is, then, ‘how do we find spirituality if not in religion?’ if you think i’ll answer, then i must have explained myself very poorly above. in the words of george ella lyon, “you are the expert on you. no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on. you don't have to know where to begin. just start. let it flow. trust the work to find its own form” (“where i’m from by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). while in her quote she was referring to the process of writing a ‘where i’m from’ poem, i see that as the same process one should undertake to describe their own beliefs. define them for yourself, defend them to yourself, and understand them fully, as you are the only one who can do so. fr. kevin grove referred to education as “a work of the resurrection” (“two notre dames by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) and that sentiment applies to self-education. to take a step back and define your thoughts by no metric other than what you believe, ignoring prescribed spirituality and pre-built ideas is to allow your point of view to be reborn. of course, this new frame of mind can include ideas from pre-existing philosophies and religions i myself began this tangent by quoting taoism but the key is that it doesn’t have to. i would say i write a poem or short story twice a week minimum. besides that, i have dozens of mini-journals filled with scraps of ideas and notes i write to myself. my goal in doing so is simple: to articulate my thoughts in a way i can understand. my goal at this point in my life is to take all that i have seen, all of the life lessons inside the classroom and out, and understand what it all means to me. that was the purpose of this essay for me. i realize it may seem hypocritical that i referred to ‘you’ in an essay so blatantly against preaching, but this was written from me to me, with no other audience in mind. i will continue writing, scribbling, and wasting notebook pages. i will continue working to define myself for myself. 1 | p a g e w e e k o n e : s e a r c h i n g f o r b e l o n g i n g i believe that my best relationships allow me to be vulnerable, because vulnerability is honesty – and honesty is the bedrock of any functioning, healthy, relationship. this has been exemplified by my american politics discussion session. the class dialogue tends to lean towards the leftward side of the political spectrum – as is often the case in universities – and students are accordingly uncomfortable or unwilling to express rightward leaning views or opinions. when a student, however, expressed his viewpoint (which was decidedly right-of-centre) the entire dynamic of the class changed. it seemed like a great weight was taken off his own shoulders, and the rest of the class – irrelevant of personal views – collectively announced great respect for his willingness to publicly state his opinion. his vulnerability seemed to immediately bring us all closer together and to forge a tighter-knit discussion class. and it is this connection that “gives purpose and meaning to our lives,” 1 as was discussed in my moreau class. when an individual refuses to be vulnerable, they are simultaneously refusing to reveal their true selves, personalities, values, beliefs, and character. it is thus impossible to not experience the joy of an incredible relationship because a truly magnificent relationship is built on an authentic understanding of another person and a comfort that one may truly be themselves around that individual. this connection is “why we’re here.” 2 in the future, i need to continue working on allowing myself to be vulnerable to others and growing to be my most authentic self in the face of my friends to form meaningful relationships. w e e k t w o : s e a r c h i n g f o r s e l f k n o w l e d g e i believe that i can best know myself through external dedication. that is, dedicating myself to an external cause to serve or an individual to help. this injects a sort of meaning into my life and allows me to better know myself. so far, i have worked to help others by surveying the notre dame student body about student government, trying to understand the aspects of our student union that people believe should be changed, and the degree to which they understand student government in the first place. admittedly, however, this work does not itself benefit my fellow students – but i seek to use the data i’ve collected to help create policy that will better match the needs and desires of my students. and i feel as though there is a genuine meaning that i find when dedicating myself to this work; i come to better understand who i am as an individual and increasingly realise my “greatest strengths” 3 in the real world. and indeed, while helping people does indeed allow me to better know myself, living for the benefit of others is most certainly a eulogy virtue, 4 and a virtue that i should work to cultivate. looking forward, i seek to continue helping others but must remember that my ideas of assistance may not always congeal with that 1 “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1 2 “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1 3 “via strengths survey” by the via institute on character moreau fye week 2 4 “should you live for your résumé … or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2 who am i? my unique identifying values and beliefs 2 | p a g e which people legitimately desire – and that i must remain attentive, to prevent myself from inadvertently doing more harm than good. w e e k t h r e e : s e a r c h i n g f o r a f r a m e w o r k i believe that my knowledge is built upon scepticism. this means that i am generally doubtful of any new knowledge, and seek consistent evidence, proof, justification, or rationed explanation to accept that novel information as valid. this system has come to play a significant role in my personal spirituality and my investigation of faith. “god discloses himself, faith responds,” 5 wrote professor david fagerberg. but this sentence seems to come into contradiction with the framework by which i live my life; most notably, the evidence-based scepticism with which i view the world; my logical and rational way of existence. does god, i wonder, genuinely disclose himself? can anyone today claim indisputable proof of the existence of god as a higher being? as far as i am aware, the general consensus of today is that there exists no certifiable proof confirming the existence of a higher authority. but is the concept of faith not entirely independent from proof? is the power of faith not that one is willing to believe even without concrete confirmational proof? this quote would seem to argue that faith stems only from evidence, but i would most certainly disagree; in a conversation with the rector of my dorm i asked about the existence of god (or, rather, for confirmation of that existence) and he replied that i shall receive none. i must instead simply have faith. in the future, i shall seek to maintain the rational and logical heading which i have already set for myself. i shall also, however, be careful not to close myself off from accepting new information nor to eliminate the potentiality for a certain degree of miracle and mystery in my life. w e e k f o u r : s e a r c h i n g f o r r e l a t i o n s h i p s i believe that healthy relationships begin with equality, as was made clear in the healthy and unhealthy relationships infographic – which claims that partners must “share decisions and responsibilities.” 6 i have experienced this with my friendships here at notre dame; in the mutual exchange of kindnesses, for instance, like helping other people with homework. i may offer help in those areas in which i am most proficient, while they help me in my weaker subjects. this is equality – a willingness of both parties to help and to offer assistance – and this is, in part, why i have been able to form so many great relationships. in the future, i shall continue to remember that all healthy relationships are formed (and continue to exist) upon the bedrock of equality. two people may not be engaged in a mutual enjoyable relationship if there does not exist a genuine level of equalness between them. w e e k f i v e : i d e n t i f y i n g n a r r a t i v e s i believe that my personal journey has greatly influenced my perspective. the places i’ve lived, visited, and the places in which i have immersed myself have come together to create me: a patchwork of different traditions and cultures. 5 “faith brings light to a dark world,” by david fagerberg moreau fye week 3 6 “healthy vs. unhealthy relationships,” by the red flag campaignmoreau fye week 4 3 | p a g e for example, my english classes were often taught by british professors, and i accordingly picked up several unique linguistic oddities from them. i tend to say, for instance, the words ‘schedule,’ and ‘aluminium’ with british-english pronunciations, despite having been born in america and speaking english with an otherwise american accent. though, in all fairness, my accent is another site of contention: the british and french alike will remark that i have an american accent, while the many americans i have met describe my method of speaking as “british,” “european,” or simply “foreign.” apparently, the way i carry myself and the words i choose to employ are somehow give away my european-ness. in another example, my scholastic knowledge has generally been very european based: i possess an exorbitant amount of knowledge on the french monarchy, the french revolution, and the period of napoleon, as well as ww1 and ww2 in particular. yet by that same token i know very little about american history. my highschool history teacher was italian and i thus studied in great depth fascist italy under the rule of mussolini, but know very little about the american civil war – and accordingly struggle in courses like my american studies class that assume students possess this most basic knowledge. these narratives and the experiences of my life have come together in a great diverse mix to make me who i am. just as father kevin grove identified a narrative to describe the founding of notre dame, (“the second notre, dame, our notre dame, began as a response to the failures of the first one”) 7 i have myself identified many narratives that help to explain my own oddities and uniqueness. in the future, i shall continue to absorb information from my surroundings, and shall continue to adopt increasingly diverse stances and viewpoints. w e e k s i x : i d e n t i f y i n g i n f l u e n c e s i believe that i carry with me the palaces i’m from. i shall always remember the time i lived in france, and seattle, and denver. i shall always remember those unique experiences – as will i remember the time i will have spent here, at notre dame. i know that as i learn and grow in this marvellous place, it will become a part of me. and later, after i have left, it will continue to affect and inform my life. i, for example, will always carry with me the concept of building better business as has been taught by my mendoza professors. i shall, in part, be from notre dame. i will be from the golden dome, from our football matches, and from carroll hall. 8 w e e k s e v e n : i d e n t i f y i n g p e r s p e c t i v e s i believe that experience is best to change a perspective; anyone seeking to test or revaluate a belief must go out and live experiences that will provide new knowledge. if holding established views against a group of people, for instance, go out and meet individuals from that group. this destroys the “single story” 9 that we discussed as being so potentially harmful. i have already witnessed changes in my perspective as a result of new experiences in class. my american studies course, for instance, entirely reinvented the way that i regarded black slaves in the usa. prior to that class, i hadn’t genuinely viewed them as historical actors; rather, they were helpless, only ever acted upon by other groups – most largely white slave owners. my american studies professor, however, and the experiences of our class, have largely eliminated that belief. we examined phyllis wealthy, who largely changed the course of history when she proved that black slaves had an intellectual capacity equal with any other group, and whose poetic writings were deeply profound. or frederik douglass, whose impassioned speeches championed the wills of white and black individuals alike and hugely contributed to the end of slavery. these 7 “two notre dames: your holy cross education,” by fr. kevin grove fagerberg moreau fye week 5 8 “where i’m from,” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6 9 “danger of a single story,” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7 4 | p a g e experiences in class have helped me to completely revaluate and replace my old beliefs and perspective. by examining such a varied plethora of individuals, the “single story,” 10 i held about black slaves has been eradicated – that group has no longer, in my mind, been “robbed of their humanity.” 11 in the future, i shall continue with my willingness to embrace new perspectives through experience and shall actively work to not shield myself form such novel occurrences. i shall always be willing to reconsider my viewpoint. 10 “danger of a single story,” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7 11 “danger of a single story,” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7 notre dame: how i have responded to my unique experience my transition to college was filled with stress during the first week as i was forced to adapt to a new environment, but having an open-minded mindset eventually facilitated a sense of belonging at notre dame. in “advice from a formerly lonely college student”, emery bergmann discusses the loneliness she faced while adjusted to cornell university as a freshman. in response to her perceived isolation, bergmann created a viral video that highlights the difficulty that most freshman college students face in their transition to a social life and emphasizes that social media creates unrealistic pressure and expectations. bergmann says, “open your mind and take experiences as they come. you’re going to find your people” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). bergmann argues that although the initial transition into college is very difficult, it is much easier if one is open to new experiences and creates a diverse group of friends. by being more open-minded to new experiences, it is easier to facilitate social interaction and close relationships, which ultimately leads to a positive college experience. bergman’s experience at cornell particularly resonated with my experience at notre dame, as i found it very difficult to transition to such a new and foreign environment during my first week at notre dame. however, i was able to respond through the stress and anxiety by remaining open-mined. by having an open mindset and learning to accept alternate perspectives, i was able to find that notre dame was a very supportive community and could easily to find a diverse group of friends that care about me. ultimately, having an open-minded mindset allowed me to persevere through the difficult transition, and eventually made me feel like i belong at notre dame. i have experienced political polarization throughout my life but have tried to be more understanding of other perspectives in order to work together with other people and have a diverse mindset. in a speech by fr. john jenkins, jenkins argues that the united states should express diverse moral perspectives more respectively. wilson says, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by rev. john i. jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). this means that it is bad for society to be close-minded and only accept one perspective. wilson argues that although the united states is very diverse with differing opinions, we should remain civil and listen to people instead of rejecting them for their perspectives. as i have personally grown up, i have experienced the negative effects of having an increasingly politically polarized climate in the united states. because of this, i determined that at notre dame one of my main goals was to be more respective of everyone’s opinions. being more open-minded to different perspectives has greatly increased my social interaction with others and has created a more civil and constructive environment. by considering opinions that differ from my personal beliefs, i have been able to gain a more diverse and holistic mindset. and although it is impossible to completely avoid political polarization, i have been able to have more meaningful and powerful conversations by critically thinking and discussing important issues with others rather than impulsively clinging on to a particular belief. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ after recognizing the implicit biases that have occurred throughout my life, i have been more deliberate in being aware of other perspectives and cultures by talking with others. in the “diversity matters” video, professor agustin fuentes argues, “people don't even consciously realize how racialized and racist our society is, but change is more possible when we hear different voices” (“diversity matters!” by prof. augustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). fuentes believes that implicit biases are prevalent in society, and frequently lead to racism and the marginalization of certain groups. however, he argues that by forming more diverse groups, people can become more aware of different perspectives and cultures. overall, humankind can become more socially unified by being open-minded of other identities and cultures. in my personal life, this idea has resonated strongly with me and has challenged me to be more aware of similar implicit biases that occur every day. by taking moreau, i have become more cognitively aware of aware of many biases i may have and attempt to eliminate them by embracing diversity in my daily life. although it is very difficult to completely remove implicit biases from everyday life, i have tried to embrace people with unique cultures and beliefs in order to have a deeper understanding and be more expecting of others. all in all, the moreau class has challenged me to become more aware of implicit biases that i have in my personal life by talking with a more diverse group of people. through adversity and difficult circumstances, i have relied on god in order to accept what has happened and move forwards. in “holy cross and christian education”, father james b. king argues, “adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (“hope – holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). this means that when people are at their lowest points in life, they become the most vulnerable and experience a large degree of character change. because people who face adversity are desperate for the adversity to end, they times of struggle become a place where people can explore themselves and their identity. through adversity, it is easy gain a explore their faith and develop a deeper faith in god. this is because many people at their lowest feel their only hope of prosperity and the end of their suffering is through god. i have found that through adversity and hard times, relying on god has been very helpful. when my grandpa passed away this october, i found that i was under a lot of stress and felt like i was on a low point in my life. however, through prayer with god, i found that i was able to come to terms with my grandpa’s death and move on with my life. although it remains tragic that my grandpa passed away, having faith in god has allowed me to better accept what happened. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 holy%20cross%20and%20christian%20education.pdf andy de la garza 12/3/2021 i came to notre dame excited to learn and ready to further myself academically. while i also knew of the university’s reputation as a “football school,” i never imagined all of the experiences, both physical and emotional, that i would be exposed to in my first semester in college. and while many of the experiences have been great, the transition was not always easy. from dealing with the transition from life in san antonio to meeting new people, i have encountered many struggles throughout my time at notre dame. these experiences have taught me the necessity of taking time for myself as well as the importance of acknowledging my shared struggles with other students. at many times throughout my first semester at the university of notre dame, i found myself becoming anxious. i felt as if i should not be sitting in my room, that time spent alone was time that could be spent meeting friends. i often felt unproductive, unsocial when i ended up in these situations, when the reality was that i was tired from a day of classes and needed time to regroup and collect myself. looking back at my early days of the semester, i feel that hearing emily bergmann’s experiences would have greatly benefitted me: “transitions are always hard — regardless of your age. but the social expectations around college put overwhelming pressure on students to fit in seamlessly into their campus, without truly acknowledging the difficulty of uprooting your life and starting fresh” (“advice from a former lonely college student” by emily bergmann moreau fye week nine). it is easy to put pressure on oneself to act a certain way, but sometimes, it is important to step back from a situation and return to it at a later time. i am now happy that i took time to rest in my room when i needed it, because it meant that i was fresh and ready to interact with others when i felt ready. when moving from home to the university of notre dame, i was both excited and nervous for the journey ahead of me. and while i feel that i have ended up at the right institution to further my development, there have been many struggles that have come with the move. at many times, i have felt broken, whether through regrets or homesickness. however, the struggles that i have encountered have given me the opportunity to react, to build myself back up. this pattern of behavior is similar to the form of art known as kintsugi: “kintsugi actually repairs broken pottery with gold, believing that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). my experience at the university of notre dame mirrors that of this form of artwork. when i have found myself in difficult situations, i have regrouped and come back stronger. i credit my ability to bounce back to the availability of my family to discuss my stress, as well my opportunity to take personal time, whether through resting in my room or running in duncan student center, to collect myself. on a college campus, students come from a variety of backgrounds. whether socially, economically, or culturally, we come together with different perspectives. being at the university of notre dame has emphasized this fact. however, i have also realized that it is easy to become acquainted with people from a similar background to yourself and miss out on the opportunity to meet new kinds of people: “the most common connotation of the word ‘community’ in our culture is ‘intimacy,’ but this is a trap” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this quote from palmer’s article emphasizes our tendency to look at our community as those who we are close to. in reality, our community is made up of much more than those that we know. i have become increasingly aware of this fact, trying to make more of an effort to surround myself with new people. regardless of our former backgrounds, we can all relate through our experiences as students at notre dame. we share struggles of adapting to a new environment as well as the positive memories created on the campus, so we are not as different as it may seem. while academics are a very important part of the college experience, i would not be making the most of my experience at the university of notre dame without attempting to understand new perspectives. as previously mentioned, i have had moments of difficulty in my transition to college life, but i am not the only one who has experienced these hardships: “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future…” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king moreau fye week twelve). regardless of our backgrounds, other students have likely experienced the same feelings as me. knowing this makes it easier to connect with others, as i know we will be able to relate through our experiences in our first semester if we have nothing else in common. while i have only been a student at the university of notre dame for a brief period of time, i have learned great amounts about myself and the community i have become a part of. through the challenging aspects of college life that i have encountered, i have learned to adapt and found ways of dealing with stress that work for me. additionally, i have learned to relate to other students through the struggles that come with adapting to college life, as they are feelings that many of us have had throughout our time on campus. i hope to continue to learn about my peers and the greater notre dame community in the upcoming semester and years that i will spend at the university. week 13integration understanding my evolution over this semester, i have experienced isolation and discovered the importance of community. inclusion is a core part of notre dame and as a student, i believe i have a role to further that sense of inclusion. this feeling has developed over the semester as i have been lucky enough to be welcomed into the notre dame community by my peers. i realize how much of an impact this sense of belonging has meant to my college experience. i feel that my desire to share that community with others has increased as the semester has progressed. during my short time so far at notre dame, i have gone from feeling like an outsider to knowing that i belong as a part of the notre dame community as a whole. when i first arrived at notre dame i felt an enormous amount of pressure to succeed. in hawaii, the quality of education is generally lower than in mainland states. i was unsure that i would be able to keep up with classes. in all honesty, i was afraid to fail. through the first few weeks of classes, i hesitated to ask anyone for help with the material assuming that everyone else already knew what was going on in all of their classes. my perception of notre dame was that every student needed to excel academically to fit in here. over the course of the semester, i began to find my place with friends and hear that other students felt the same way. this helped me to recognize how dangerous these thoughts were to my mental health. when we reached week 9 this quote stuck out to me particularly “this is a stressful and discouraging way to live. remember that none of us is perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens.”("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) i was only able to overcome this way of thinking that caused me to isolate myself through the support of the friendships that i had formed because of the excellent community at notre dame through these experiences, i came to recognize that not everyone seeks out community, some need to be welcomed to it. i was too afraid to be honest with others about my struggles. my isolation came from myself. other members of the community made an effort to include me which helped me understand the flaws in my perception. this quote from the with voices true video reflects my experience “i think we should be more curious and not treat people like an alien” ( “with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven) it was through questions that lead to conversations that i began to feel accepted in my new home. simple chats have come to mean quite a bit for me. i feel that asking is an effective way to get to know someone and grow closer to them. this feeling has only gotten stronger as i have spent more time here. as a part of my attempts to help strengthen the community around me, i try to have honest conversations and ask about people’s lives. many people here are surprisingly honest about what is going on in their own lives. their honesty and willingness to share about themselves remind me of our section on vulnerability. one of my uncles back in hawaii, uncle being a term associated with any older friend of the family, liked to talk a lot about abstract concepts. one day he told me he had been reading the work of a mystic poet and was thinking about a particular quote “it is only through suffering that one is able to understand all the chambers of the heart.” unexpectedly this quote has stuck with https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105060 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105060 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105095 me for about two years. it helped me to begin thinking of moments of trauma and hurt as ways to more fully understand myself and my emotions. to learn to accept both highs and lows as part of life is difficult, however, i believe that by doing so i can be a more complete and empathetic person. this reminds me of the following quote from the kintsugi video “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto network moreau fye week ten) for the semester, i feel that i have come to place a greater significance on my mental health. i think my understanding of the importance of experiences good and bad in the process of emotional growth has increased significantly and helped me to grow as a more conscious, kind, and understanding person. this semester i have encountered adversity in a number of forms. in our reading from holy cross and christian education, there was the following quote “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future.” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve) i believe that through the course of this semester i have recognized my shortcomings, identified areas for improvement, found a reliable community of friends and grown as a person. moving forward i have come to realize that i can overcome any obstacle i face. the reading on hope helped me to understand hardship and adversity as an opportunity to grow and become better equipped to handle similar challenges in the future. throughout the semester i believe that i have evolved and changed in ways i did not and could not anticipate. i recognized the importance of community and inclusion in supporting others. i acknowledged areas in which i could grow despite the uncomfortable feelings it could cause. i know that this semester i faced new and unique challenges, responsibilities, and situations. i know that my experiences both positive and negative, are steps on the path to becoming a stronger, more resilient individual who is ready to approach future obstacles constructively and healthily to overcome them. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105078 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105078 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/modules/items/105110 maria finan 15 oct. 2021 moreau fys i believe that i am called during week 6, i wrote an “i am from” poem about my life through 18 years. one thought stands out still: i am from dreams and calls to action//don’t let the world pass me by. i suppose that the lines continue to resonate because they strongly reflect my beliefs. above all, i believe that i am here to help others. i believe that i’m meant to learn and grow every day. i must build on my strengths and address my weaknesses to reach my greatest potential, which i am to direct toward those in need. first, to be able to grow as an individual, i must first be willing to identify my own values, skills, and weaknesses. i will also have to act on them rather than on others’ agendas. an integral part of this is having confidence in my own path and resisting the temptation to let others’ opinions and judgments distract me. i cannot allow my self-esteem and pride to be diminished. further, i believe that choosing the bold less-traveled path is essential. as i learned from brené brown’s ted talk (week 1), people find fulfilment when they pursue their own ambitions and resist the temptation to join the rat race. transferring that to my own life, i believe that i need to do what i feel, not what others might expect or want. i spend too much time worrying about what others think of my behavior, and i am not proud of it. yet, as i recognize this, it becomes easier to avoid it. now, as i am exposed to so much in college, i have a huge opportunity to follow my own voice. to those ends, i am unwilling to settle for work that will simply pay my bills. if i spend around 40 hours a week working in an undesired job, that’s roughly half of the time i am not sleeping. unfortunately, in terms of work, most people don’t have much of a choice. because i am fortunate enough to have options, i have no reason not to take advantage of them. i am unwilling to simply throw time away so that i can make money. now, i’d like to return to my comment about recognizing my desire to please others. though it is far easier to spend time explaining what i am good at, that is unproductive. david brooks (week 2) identifies this mindset as adam 1: “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths.” he suggests that instead of spending time as adam 1, we should become adam 2, which “is built by fighting your weaknesses.” adam 2 makes an effort to recognize where he has room to grow. i know that i have to be adam 2 more if i want to learn and grow as a person. for me, becoming adam 2 often seems like fr. pete’s concept of the knot in the shoelace. (week 3) it looks like a roadblock along the way, but it is actually a different, better path. it’s tempting to shy away from the knot or even resist acknowledging its existence. nobody likes talking about their flaws, especially not around many other people. vulnerability is scary, but as brené brown emphasizes, it’s pretty much necessary. next, i am called to actively reach for respect for both myself and others. part of that involves tuning out biases and stereotypes and even working to thwart them. i am not going to claim that i have no biases. unfortunately, i have given in to different assumptions and stereotypes throughout my whole life. while i can blame others, the responsibility still falls on myself. excuses are merely a denial of the need to become adam 2. additionally, though many types of discrimination don’t involve me, that doesn’t mean i am allowed to let them persist. the article from week 7 mentions that black applicants for jobs are systematically disadvantaged. that’s not okay. i believe that i am called to bring positive change, such as eliminating that type of bias in practice. even though it might not be that specific issue, i would find more satisfaction in tackling a tangible problem than drudging through a conventional corporate job. it would allow me to respect others and myself. in my opinion, relegating myself to a relatively meaningless role in this world would be disrespectful to god and those who have provided for me. likewise, focusing on material wealth would do the same. nevertheless, striving to create positive change will not be easy. it’s not difficult to uphold values and morals in theory. but it’s much more difficult to do so in practice. i’ve found that that is when prejudices surface the most. also, i worry that many prejudices and implicit biases that i am not even aware of will hinder my abilities. in the week 6 video, fr. kevin grove mentions that “we cannot love the god whom we do not see if we don’t love the brother whom we do see.” i can equate loving the god whom we don’t see to committing oneself to upholding morals and creating change. both ideas are ambitious and in a certain sense untested. but the real challenge is putting whatever it may be into practice. again, nobody is perfect, but i can’t claim to be a champion of equality if i fail to consider the perspective of someone unfamiliar. i also can’t maximize my efforts if i shy away from certain situations based on biases or a lack of comfort. as audrey ’23 says in the week 3 pamphlet, “to find your place and ultimately yourself, you sometimes need to face the things that make you uncomfortable.” additionally, i would be mistaken to believe that i can accomplish a lot on my own. part of what i have realized in these first few months at notre dame is that i need the help, guidance, and companionship of others not just socially. college and what comes after it is much different from high school. i can’t always be a solo act anymore, despite how that realization might scare my ego. a challenge for me with developing more relationships is resisting the need for the attention. sometimes i have a hard time listening, and i might feel like i must bring the focus back to me. nobody really enjoys hanging out with that guy. when you are only dealing with yourself, you don’t need to worry about balance or control. but when other people come into play, it’s a different story. to maintain healthy relationships, i must remind myself to listen to others even more than to myself. if i am contributing to unhealthy relationships, such as controlling ones (week 4), it will be difficult to achieve much. so, if i write an “i am from” poem in 30 years, what will it look like? first, it will express my same ambitions and values that i hold today, such as learning, service, and growth. but i hope that it also expresses my achievements and successes, not for my own glory but for the positive impact i will have made in the world. 11/29/21 integration #2 encountering a deeper identity from meeting new people, changing my routine, and joining new clubs and events, i have had so many opportunities to learn and grow. i remember being scared of the transition from middle school to high school. now, i can look back and realize how much i have changed and how much more confident i feel. i am so glad that i got to encounter the things that i encountered in high school because they have really prepared me for college. this semester has been challenging for me. rigorous stem classes, trips back and forth from holy cross to notre dame, and being a member of the marching band, i have had to learn to use my time very wisely-studying every chance i get, staying up late, and skipping meals. like all college freshmen, the process of adapting to a completely foreign environment is difficult. there have been times where i have felt overwhelmed, second guessed my major, and became frustrated by my situation, but these times have allowed me to encounter trust and perseverance. these situations have given me wake-up calls, confirming that i am on my own now. nobody is going to tell me to start studying multiple nights in advance, or eat a healthy dinner, or do the laundry, or stop scrolling on my phone. i have realized that it is now up to me. i have always been pretty independent, and i knew that this was going to happen before going to college, but now it's real. this realization has sprouted many more. i am excited to share my encounterings so far as they continue to build my identity. i think that one of the hardest parts of college for me is putting myself out there. since i like to stick with routines in my comfort zone, sometimes i will rely on other people when i have to make a change. julia hogan says it's important to, “trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to.”[footnoteref:0] there are so many methods to trying new activities and diversifying your friend group. i have been telling myself that it is ok to create my own path. in accordance with this lesson that i am still trying to learn, father james b. king states, “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next.”[footnoteref:1] in order to achieve my goals it is vital that i allow myself to be comfortable not having control over situations. making sacrifices is an especially hard request because of how easy it is to assume that my needs should come first. having hope guides this process. college has definitely given me more opportunities to be hopeful, whether it's academics or my faith. [0: (https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by julia hogan moreau fye week 9)] [1: (https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28317/modules/items/106340 by father james b. king moreau fye week 12)] another aspect of college that i have learned is that diversity is important. i am grateful that i have gotten to meet and know a variety of people at holy cross and notre dame. at my high school, the population was pretty diverse but everyone still had many similarities and lived close by in nicer neighborhoods. here, i have noticed that people surprise you all the time with the talents that they have and the backgrounds that they come from. christopher devron concluded his article about critical race theory by saying, “rooted and grounded in our tradition, we will more effectively advance our catholic jesuit mission to form leaders committed to the common good who, aided by god’s grace, may strive to overcome and eradicate all forms of discrimination, which are contrary to god’s intent.”[footnoteref:2] i have really enjoyed the sense of community that notre dame has created. that was one of the reasons that i wanted to come here. i remember when i was researching other colleges in high school, greek life was a common topic. i personally was not a big fan of it though because i felt like one of the communities would pick me based on how they thought of me, versus me being able to explore and choose my own community. [2: https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 by christopher devron moreau fye week 10)] notre dame and holy cross also center their academics and community on faith. i feel like faith makes this community feel even more tight-knit. because of this environment i am able to deepen my faith and feel comfortable in new situations. parker palmer emphasizes in his writing, “if we are willing to embrace the spiritual potentials of suffering, then both community and leadership, human resourcefulness and the capacity to hold it in trust, will prove to be abundant among us—gifts we have been given from the beginning but are still learning how to receive.”[footnoteref:3] i have discovered this semester that suffering is essential for growth and trust. being put in a tough spot, allows you to ask for help which you should not be criticized for. when i was struggling with my biology lab paper, i decided to go in and talk with my teacher. i was confused by his directions at first and i really wanted to get a good grade because this paper was going to be a large part of my grade. before asking for help, i was nervous and hoping i could just figure it out on my own. i never really needed to ask for extra help in high school, so this was new territory for me. however, once i talked to my professor, i had a much better understanding of what he was looking for in my paper and i got to know him better. [3: (http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ by parker palmer moreau fye week 11)] this semester has changed my mindset, my faith, and my identity so much already and i am looking forward to what i will encounter in the next seven semesters. fye integration one an extensive culmination of the values and beliefs that have been outlined via a septilateral narrative and cumulative course designed to evoke reflection and introspection on an individual’s moral and personal journey (aecotvabthbovasnaccdteraioaimapj) by mike scanlon taking moreau first year experience has opened my eyes to the pillars of my character which i had never realized before this class. being in an environment so conducive to vulnerability is truly a breath of fresh air that has forced me to reflect on who i was, who i am, and who i would like to become. all of the values outlined in this integration are at the heart of who i am today. i believe that i am made to protect the people i love. i have always had an intrinsic desire to offer and provide protection to people, regardless of my relationship with them. i saw a stranger a few weeks ago in chicago being sexually harassed, verbally, by a drunken stranger after a concert. noticing that i had taken notice of the situation, she made intense eye contact with me, and i proceeded to come to her aid by coming to her side as if we had been at the concert together. i walked her away from the man and she thanked me. i walked away, not expecting anything in return, but feeling proud of who i am at that moment. david brooks argues that “there’s a difference between your desired self and your actual self” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by scott brooks moreau fye week two), but that night i think my two selves overlapped, a feeling that i strive to replicate every day of my life. i believe that my purpose in life is to love everyone who leaves an impact on me. i used to keep a list of all the people who have had the biggest impact on my life. i have since stopped because i could no longer keep track of all the individuals who have had influence over making me who i am today. each one of them has made a difference in my life, and so i attempt to repay them by showing them love and doing my best to return the favor. father edward sorin, csc, and his congregation settled at notre dame du lac under the condition laid forth by blessed basil moreau that they would establish a university here, repaying the community and the country for the opportunities it offered them by establishing a means of academic and spiritual enrichment for its population, and for their congregation (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” by father edward sorin, csc moreau fye week five). i believe that who i am is a direct result of the relationships i have formed. i have found that while meeting people at notre dame may be easy due to the plethora of common traits and interests amongst its students, making meaningful connections with friends is hindered by a lack of willingness to open up to complete strangers. while building relationships https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view does take time,“in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen” ("the power of vulnerability" by brene brown moreau fye week one). by being vulnerable we allow our “shared stories” to “help us discover a shared destiny and our shared affection for one another” ("how to destroy truth" by david brooks moreau fye week seven). i believe that failure is the best teacher. throughout my life, and even since coming to notre dame, i have had many relationships disintegrate because people were not who i expected them to be. however, every failed relationship has taught me what i value most in the relationships that i look to create. if a relationship is not helping both parties “mutually [grow] … on a path toward becoming better people” ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau week four), then it really is not worth keeping. learning how to be better in the future based on the results of the past has become a key to how i live my life. i believe that i am happiest when those i love are happy. where i am from, everybody knows everybody else. therefore, we are always looking out for each other. i have found a similar environment here at notre dame. while the academic schedule is rigorous, there is little competition between students to be better than each other. i have found that this produces a healthier environment and that people are generally happy for each other and support one another’s academic and personal endeavors. likewise, i live in large part through the experiences of my friends. i am happier when my friends are doing well. i love to watch them prosper and will ultimately sacrifice my own happiness for theirs if it ever comes to it. i was raised to treat everyone like family ("where i'm from" by mike scanlon moreau fye week six), and so there is no price that is too high for me to pay to see the people i love succeed. i believe that giving and receiving love is the purpose of life. whenever someone asks about the meaning of life, i always say love. at notre dame, i have experienced love everywhere i go, specifically in my dorm community. living in pangborn and being a part of the smallest men’s community on campus has been a blessing for all of us. we all talk about how beautiful it is that each of us knows the other 70 by name. i hate to see guys who will be talking with someone, ask what dorm they are in, and have them both be from the same dorm. in pangborn, we know every last person who lives here. each of us love each other and would sacrifice for each other without thinking twice. it is truly a special quality of our community which our rector instilled in us from the first day. through our mutual love and respect for each other, each of us “will[s] the good of another” ("faith brings light to a dark world" by david fagerberg moreau fye week three), showing how our faith and love persist outside of our building via our slogan “go and do likewise.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105574 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28311/modules/items/105511 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hbvfbaprldlp2mvcoed4gv-xskartrpywvz9ueyjzka/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau integration one notre dame lauren: a healthier and better version of myself throughout my short time here at notre dame, i have already discovered more about who i am and who i want to be than i could ever imagine. the people that i have met and the experiences that i have had here have helped me to know with certainty that this is where i am meant to be. moreau has helped me to identify my three main root beliefs: i believe that i grow by working on my weaknesses, i believe that i am searching for meaningful relationships, and i believe that i am a child of god. root belief #1: i believe that i grow by working on my weaknesses. as a child, my parents always encouraged me to focus on my strengths and not dwell on my weaknesses; however, as i matured and began to clearly understand what my major strengths and flaws were, they challenged me to work on my weaknesses to make me a more well-rounded person. this has always been very hard for me to do, as i do not like to admit that i have weaknesses; however, coming to notre dame has helped me to realize several areas that i need to grow in. in week two of moreau, we took a survey that informed us of our greatest strengths and weaknesses; surprisingly, love was my lowest rated strength (via character strengths survey by via adult surveymoreau fye week two). although this was a tough pill to swallow, i realized that i do have a hard time showing my love for others. over the last few weeks, i have been trying to express my love in my new relationships but also in my older ones. i have been especially trying to communicate a lot with my parents and tell them that i love them, as i know they have been lonely without me and my sister. this has helped me to grow my relationship with them and become more comfortable with showing people that i care. https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup coming to notre dame, i have realized that there are a lot of issues in the world that i am ignorant about. writing my “where i’m from” poem caused me to realize that this is mainly due to the people and environment that i have been surrounded by ("where i'm from" by george ella lyonmoreau fye week 6): i grew up in a wealthier suburb, went to primarily white catholic schools for my entire life, and have been blessed with loving parents who protect me from the injustices that exist in the world. i never really thought about how these attributes may have created a sense of insensitivity for people who are different than me. in week 7 of moreau, we learned about implicit bias and how “it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair” ("how to think about 'implicit bias'" by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. dorismoreau fye week 7). in our class discussion that week, we talked about how we can try to pursue the truth rather than just accept unfair stereotypes, and how it is important to show empathy to people. notre dame has allowed me to meet so many people with vastly different backgrounds than me, and i have realized that my lack of knowledge about other cultures and limited ability to show empathy are definitely areas of weakness that i both need and want to work on. i know that i will be a much more wellrounded person and overall better human being if i can focus on growing in these areas. root belief #2: i believe that i am searching for meaningful relationships. throughout my life, i have created and lost more friendships than i can count. i am the type of person that will try to keep a relationship alive even if i recognize that it is toxic and unhealthy because of how much i care about everyone. in week four of moreau, we watched the #thatsnotlove campaign, and the repeated “because i love you” phrase really stood out to me ("because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundationmoreau fye week four). i http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g realized that i was still holding on to a past relationship because of a false sense of love and that i would not be able to move on until i let this person go. although it was difficult, it allowed me to focus more on growing new relationships that were healthier, and it helped me to envision the type of future relationships that i want. in high school, i was more focused on pursuing romantic relationships, but i have realized that what i am really looking for is a group of good friends. i often find myself doing everything i can to help other people and listen to their problems; however, i find it very hard to talk about my own issues. in week one of moreau, we watched a video about the importance of being vulnerable with others and ourselves (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). vulnerability is something that i have always struggled with, as i prefer my life to appear like the perfectly wrapped present that was shown in the video. i watched this video the night before i arrived at notre dame, and i was reminded of the importance of being honest with myself and other people about how i feel. i knew that i needed to allow myself to fully connect with other people, but i knew that it would take time. i am very happy to say that i have now found friends that i can trust, and i have begun to share more about myself than i would have previously been comfortable with. there are still times that i struggle and do not share my feelings, but i hope to continue growing in this area in order to maintain and grow my new relationships. root #3: i believe that i am a child of god. i was raised in the catholic religion and have gone to catholic schooling for my entire educational life, so faith has definitely had a large part in shaping who i am and what i believe. however, during the last year, i was going through a very rough patch in my life, and my relationship with god was damaged as a result. i tried praying, but it did not seem like anyone was listening. discussing how to combat struggles with faith, father pete emphasized three https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be methods that one can use to help grow his or her spirituality: he tells us to be patient, to remember that each person’s journey is unique, and to remain hopeful ("the role of faith in our story" by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.moreau fye week 3). these tips were very helpful in mending my relationship with god, and coming to notre dame has allowed me to reconnect with god in a way that i did not know i needed. before last year, i went to church every weekend; however, it was not until i came to notre dame that i began going to church again and actually enjoying it. even though i did not come to notre dame because of its catholic identity, the integration of faith both inside and outside of the classroom has been one of my favorite parts about the school. fr. kevin grove explains that holy cross was founded “to remind the world that the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason” ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove, c.s.cmoreau fye week 5). this school truly does give us an education geared at growing both our hearts and our minds, and elements of faith are seen all throughout campus. my favorite thing to do when i am sad or stressed is to go to the grotto, and i always see several other people there praying. at most schools, praying might be seen as lame or weird, but i think it is so amazing what a huge role faith plays in this campus and how everyone respects other people’s beliefs. my reconnection to god has really helped me transition to my new life here at notre dame, and i am so glad to have found a community that encourages faith. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 1 archuleta my path towards acceptance and growth in my first semester here at notre dame i have encountered many struggles as well as opportunities to overcome those struggles. although there are no solutions for everything i still know that i have resources that will help me guide me on my path towards finding a good response. being here i have encountered truthfulness as well. i know that the truth is sometimes hard to face but i understand that i need to accept the truth because it will make me progress and prosper as a student and good person overall. the most challenging question i have encountered in my first semester is, “do i belong?” before moving here i knew i would face a lot of new changes but i felt optimistic and was excited for what was to come, after all high school had prepared me for college. although i felt ready and prepared to endure a new adventure of a lifetime, i grew to understand that nothing can truly prepare you 100% for college. that is why college is called an adventure because it’s full of surprises filled with ups and downs. the academic portion in college was different for me and i felt like i was not good enough but notre dame reassured my presence and performance. accepting my failure has been a turning point in my education and my life. i felt dissatisfied with myself and seeing so many bright classmates outperform you was discouraging. in high school you can study right before a test and get an a but i learned the hard way that college is nothing compared to high school academics. the majority of my life i did many things that i thought would make others proud and the following sentence revealed to me the truth in doing so, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i understand that always trying to make others happy instead of partaking in activities that would contribute to my 2 archuleta own happiness was what took me so long to understand to accept failure and learn from it. being content with my own work and effort is what will further my own health. i believe that growing up i had an internal stigma about having to ask for help with school work. for the first time in my life i don’t feel embarrassed to say that i am getting tutored and receiving aid to help me perform well in classes. living my life to satisfy the needs of others was something that i have done for too long in my life and i understand it is good to fail sometimes in order to succeed. i felt disconnected from my identity and being a minority forced me to feel like an outsider when i first came to campus. but i believe what has helped me the most is finding friends who share similar interests with me. i even have a friend here who is also native american and went to school in the same city as me. i can relate to her about many things here at notre dame, but she, as well as many other people here, have taught me to step out of my comfort zone and create friendships with people from all different backgrounds. “known in c.s.t. as imago dei , it holds that each human person is created in the likeness and image of god and is therefore deserving of dignity and respect.” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten). notre dame has taught me to accept myself and others which is a large emphasis they provide here on campus to create an inclusive community. as a result i do have friends that are from all over the world and country with different stories and upbringings. “...community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received. when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). it’s truly inspiring to see how we all share one thing in common and that is being able to share the notre dame experience with one another. 3 archuleta unlike some of my friends at other universities i feel like notre dame provides a close knit community that allows you to express yourself and supports you for who you are. lastly, the most difficult challenge i have faced was learning how to be vulnerable. i never felt comfortable opening up and putting myself in situations where i had to truly be myself. i thought that i could force myself to get through anything without having to ask for help or be real. but these past several weeks i have and still am learning how to go outside of my comfort zone and accept vulnerability, accept everyone, and accept myself. “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (holy cross and christian education by rev. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). this quote stood out to me the most because it defined my situation. having the willingness to accept change and truthfullness is what has been a response to many of the hardships i have endured, but through it all i have endured many positive results. accepting and learning from my failures, understanding that it is ok to be vulnerable, and knowing that my differences are what make me human and unique has allowed me to grow. notre dame is a hardworking school to say the least but all of my experiences i have encountered so far on campus have only strengthened me and have pushed me to work on becoming a better student and person overall. i believe i will succeed in these next four years with the notre dame environment that i am privileged to learn and live in. albanese-week 8 integration one albanese 1 moreau first year experience andrew whittington 15 october 2021 this, i believe i believe that courage and vulnerability are integral aspects of shaping who you are and who you will grow to become. another big part of this is authenticity, which ties into vulnerability and courage as well. in her ted talk, dr. brown notes, “in order for a connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). to me, this comment of hers was extremely insightful. i took a minute to fully process what she is saying here, and i envisioned this statement in the context of my own life, particularly in the new environment that i and many others are in right now. you may meet thousands of people during the course of your lifetime, but as dr. brown pointed out, a connection is truly genuine when we “allow ourselves to be seen”, which i interpret as being our authentic, raw selves, which takes not only a lot of courage, but also practice i believe. i have realized that even though vulnerability can be so daunting, it is also a beautiful thing, as she described, because so many other things can blossom because of vulnerability: love, connections, and so much more. these displays of vulnerability manifest themselves in the journey of self discovery and growth that i am currently on as i move forward at notre dame. i believe that establishing your core values as well as living freely will help you become your most authentic self. as i derived from david brooks’ discussion about resume versus eulogy virtues, it is comforting to have a bit of the grasp on the fact that i am not someone who lives a calculated, cold life just to be successful (“should you live for your resume or your https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim albanese 2 eulogy?” by davis brooksmoreau fye week two). i have my core values and i stick to them, and at the end of the day, people will not mainly remember you for what you accomplished in life, but how you treated people and who you were as a person, which is very important to me. living freely also ties into finding your most authentic self. david brooks states, “in order to forgive yourself you have to forget yourself.” these were very thought provoking words to me, because he is making a great point of truly allowing oneself to let go. let go of all hatred, grudges, and negative emotions or thoughts, and to do this you have to completely detach yourself from who you are and reality, to truly be set free. i believe that you must use your faith as a stepping stone to self discovery. as father pete rightly points out in his youtube video, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is the one of self discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. petemoreau fye week three). i think that faith plays a huge role in your own self discovery, particularly here at notre dame. after i read the reflections of the notre dame students too, it is clear that so many of them have credited faith with being an integral part of shaping who they are, and their lives in general. i am eager to utilize faith as a stepping stone to my own self discovery. i also have always been fond of the quote by michael josephson, “take pride in how far you have come. have faith in how far you can go.” this has been my life motto in a sense, you must always have faith, but also never forget how hard you have worked to get where you are and where you came from. i believe that early recognition of warning signs will help you determine toxic relationships, and i also believe that it is better to intervene in a situation before it escalates. here at notre dame, the greendot program is something students can get involved in to train how to better respond to certain situations, and i hope to complete this training soon. whether it be in a friendship, or a relationship with a significant other, the relationship should not be one sided. the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry albanese 3 “because i love you” video that we watched for week 4, was really thought provoking, and it framed this seemingly sweet and innocent phrase in a completely different light; one that is used to manipulate or control the other person in the relationship (“because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundationmoreau fye week four). i think it is important to recognize these signs of control or manipulation in the relationship before it may become very toxic and damaging for the person. i believe that taking time to learn about those who came before you is important to gain a greater appreciation of communities that you are a part of. learning more about the figures who spearheaded the development of the university of notre dame helped me gain an even greater appreciation and sense of honor to be accepted and attending the school. father sorin said, “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country…” (“letter to bl. basil moreau” by fr. sorinmoreau fye week five). father sorin’s hopes for this university have most definitely come to fruition. i feel so proud and honored to be a part of this community that is such a force for good, as father sorin had envisioned at the start. it has been quite an adjustment moving here from new jersey, and living on my own, however, the vibrant, close knit community that notre dame exudes has made the process seamless, and attending this school makes you want to live up to the expectations of the founders, and make them proud if they were here today to see how far it has come, and how the students reflect upon the school. coming to college, i didn’t think i was ready to be by myself, but after being here for these few weeks, i already realize, i am not alone, i am not by myself; and i actually was ready to start a new chapter, even though i hadn’t quite realized it yet. i believe that hearing the perspectives of others helps you broaden and deepen your understanding and view of those around you, as well as the world. i really, truly loved https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189192?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189192?wrap=1 albanese 4 conversing with my fellow classmates about their own stories and journeys, and it has allowed me to feel more connected to them, but also enabled me to gain a deeper understanding of the world around me, and more in tune with others' experiences. learning about stephanie’s childhood, growing up in texas right by the border and how that impacted her was so impactful and eye opening for me. also, learning about how tyler, being from west virginia, had encountered his state living with a serious opioid epidemic, and how that shaped him into wanting to go into psychology, and ultimately try to help people with their mental health, but without using drugs. i loved getting a glimpse of others' lives, it helped me become immersed in their shoes, and allowed me to gain more perspective. i believe that overcoming implicit bias and becoming comfortable with your own story helps you to pursue the truth. a shocking quote from scientific american article states, “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice. it would be comforting to conclude, when we don’t consciously entertain impure intentions, that all of our intentions are pure. unfortunately, we can’t conclude that: many of us are more biased than we realize. and that is an important cause of injustice—whether you know it or not” ( "how to think about 'implicit bias'" by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. dorismoreau fye week seven). this was the concluding paragraph to the article, which i think wrapped it up in a very concise but also compelling way. it is helping us to come to the realization that even though we may want to act or think a certain way, sometimes, our underlying biases are simply inescapable, which ultimately is a big factor for injustice and discrimination as well. additionally, it is very interesting and eye opening to listen to other people’s stories who have lived completely different lives as you, and to get their perspective on things to broaden your perspective of the world. these two factors of recognizing https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ albanese 5 your inner biases as well as learning about others can come together hand in hand to be a force for overcoming biases or injustices in the world to seek the truth. integration one essay drew espeseth 15 october 2021 growth toward success through participation each individual is unique in how they function, learn, process experiences, and how they were formed. i think that a certain amount of self-awareness is good and necessary for positive growth, therefore the recognition of personal beliefs is critical. while the process of learning and changing is constant and never-ending, i can pinpoint my own core qualities and beliefs as they are so far in my journey of growth. when asked to name a few words to describe me, my parents, siblings, and friends most frequently responded with the word “driven”. as for my own word to describe myself, i think the word “fearless” is most fitting. the extent to which these adjectives accurately describe my character can be seen throughout my core beliefs about myself. beginning with my past and how i was formed, i believe that i am strongly influenced by my catholic faith, my parents’ value of selflessness, my siblings’ teachings about competitiveness, and the opportunities for adventure in my hometown environment. i am my own person, but i am also undoubtedly a product of my environment. growing up as the youngest child, i wanted nothing more than to be as strong and smart as my older brothers, which fueled my drive for competition and difficulty accepting failure. this could also be a factor of my “drivenenes”. george ella’s “where i’m from” poem closes with the lines “i am from those moments--/snapped before i budded --/leaf-fall from the family tree.” this alludes to the influences family can have on one’s upbringing, and yet it is stated later in the george ella lyon article that “no one else sees the world as you do; no one else has your material to draw on” (where.html by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). the values of the church have been instilled in me from an early age, and i still carry them throughout my daily life. finding fun and positivity in the small town i grew up in taught me to say “yes” to new experiences and possibilities, which i believe makes me fearless. hope is another integral part of who i am. i believe that i am hopeful for a positive outcome in every situation, and that this allows me to trust in god. part of being driven and fearless is having expectations for the future, which is sort of how hope works. in the grotto article from week 3, it is stated that “hope directs our desire toward its true end, which is the kingdom of heaven” (faith-brings-light-to-dark-world by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). having this hope opens up our hearts, whether to fail or to succeed. this sentiment relates to the idea of vulnerability covered in week 1, “as a result of authenticity, they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were, which you have to absolutely do that for connection.” (transcript by brene brown, moreau fye week one). being vulnerable enough to show your true self gives you the opportunity to be great, as long as you incorporate hope for a positive outcome. i believe that humor and positivity are important in healthy relationships, and that lightheartedness can make relationships enjoyable, which is how they are supposed to be. while this quality seems like it can be shallow, it is actually very important to forming vulnerable relationships that improve depth of character, “out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (watch by david brooks, moreau fye week two). i believe that in order to grow in our “adam two”, we need to experience other people’s strengths and experience the consequences of our own weaknesses. this can cause suffering, but allows us to learn from our mistakes. the suffering we often experience is individual and important to our own personal narrative, but relative with regard to other people. there are always others who have experienced a similar thing, or something worse. thus, we can take these instances and change. i believe that being a driven person involves accepting mistakes and using them to move forward into success, which requires a bit of fearlessness as well. “talking to a friend about our stresses and struggles can be incredibly helpful for healing wounds and figuring out a real solution....there is, however, a difference between confiding and excessive complaining” (signs-of-toxic-friendships by olivia t taylor, moreau fye week four). this quote touches on an experience many of us have had, when it feels like someone is using you to vent and not listening to your own struggles. i believe that these relationships, the relationships in which we are unequally treated and used, are unhealthy and can be harmful. however, like many bad experiences, it can be used to learn and grow. even if we are unable to escape a relationship like this, it is possible to gain self understanding by listening to the other person’s problems and applying them to our own struggles. on the other hand, healthy relationships are critical to maintaining self confidence and self love. in order to lead a smooth and successful life, we often need to let go of people or situations that are bringing us down, which can be rather scary. to be truly fearless, i believe that i have to let go of harmful relationships. so far my experience here at notre dame has shown me that selflessness is one of the most powerful actions. this goes hand-in-hand with the idea that vulnerability is the foundation for courage and connections. when we humble ourselves to a position of servitude in order to help our classmates or friends, we give them all the power in the situation. however, we also express our love, which empowers ourselves and our faith in god. this is critical to our education as it allows us to mature spiritually and gain wisdom to guide us in how we utilize the knowledge we gain here in school. “when life comes to teach you a lesson, you will repeat the class if you don’t pass the test” (watch carla harris commencement speech, moreau fye week five). one of these lessons that we learn is about the implicit biases that we all have. we must seek to hear new stories in order to diversify our perspectives about other groups. it is natural for our brains to try to draw connections between people and create stereotypes so that we can predict things, but this can cause unfairness to others. ideally, we can try to train our brains to use this skill of drawing connections to find similarities between ourselves and people of other ethnicities so that we can find common ground, “if a country can’t tell narratives in which everybody finds an honorable place, then righteous rage will drive people toward tribal narratives that tear it apart.” (patriotism-misinformation.html new york times, moreau fye week seven). through the lessons i have learned by listening to others, the growth i have experienced from my own suffering and mistakes, and the relationships i have had, both healthy and unhealthy, i can see that success as a person of society and success as a servant of god are both difficult tasks. however, i believe that my positive qualities of humor, determination, and courage, along with hope and trust in god, can guide me to become a better person in an ever changing world. integration 1 lopez 1 professor chan 15 oct. 2021 moreau first year experience section 10 my vocation is love i believe that my vocation is love. this idea comes from story of a soul, the autobiography of the nineteenth century saint, saint thérèse of lisieux. i say that my vocation is love, because there are many different paths i could take with my life, and all surround this theme of love. if i am to marry, it is so that in being kind to my husband, i can give kindness to jesus. if i join religious life as a sister, i would do so out of love for god, giving him everything that i am and have, one hundred percent. if i were to decide to stay single and consecrate myself, i would do so to give all my talent to whatever job i possess so that i can help people as much as i can, out of love for them as my brothers and sisters in christ. love is a part of everything that i should do. love involves being kind to everyone, no matter people’s weaknesses, and allows people to look past troubles. it also allows people to be vulnerable with each other. vulnerability allows people to be genuine with each other and show each other their love, and having courage means one can have conversations with one’s loved ones. in week one of moreau first year experience, dr. brown’s interviews revealed the following about people who are joyful, “these folks, very simply, had the courage to be imperfect” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). the reason that imperfection allows people to be joyful is that they are able to understand that everyone is human, but still be able to see the spirit of god in each person. from this, i have learned that i should practice vulnerability. with this attitude https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 lopez 2 toward others, one can be compassionate with others, and find that they should love each other in every way possible and show this love throughout their lives. i also understand that for my vocation of love, not everything i do will be perfect. however, as father kevin said, “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). anytime that i recognize something i am doing wrong, i will realize that it can be turned into an opportunity for growth. i believe that my family has influenced me to become the best version of myself. george ella lyon wrote that she is from the things that have happened to her and the things that she grew up with, saying, “i am from those moments--snapped before i budded --” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). if part of me is defined by where i come from, my family is definitely the largest factor in who i have become so far, and they have taught me to want to become a better person every day. my family, although weak in several ways, has brought me up with goodness and love. they are the reason i have faith in my life. i believe that i am searching for love. this is a longing that everyone has within them, and it is inherently good. for a long time, i did not understand what it meant to be made in god’s image and likeness. now, i see some of the aspects that it contains. the inclinations that we have reflect god’s own characteristics. god helps us, and we like to help others, too. god knows everything, and we want to know everything, too (even though it is not possible). in the new testament, jesus commands us to “love [god] above all else” and to “love [our] neighbors as ourselves.” however, people often search for fulfillment in the world. gathering things such as “resume virtues”, as brooks describes, causes one to “become a cold, calculating creature . . . where you realize there is a difference between your actual self and your desired self” (“should https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim lopez 3 you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). therefore, doing things for more credibility does not give someone the feeling of fulfillment in life. love is something that does give fulfillment, as it is everywhere in the simple things of life. it can be in any kind of relationship, whether it is romantic, friendly, or familial. searching for love means i can find others who will help me become my desired self, gathering holy virtues and becoming a better person. the power of love is that it does not require us to be intelligent, particularly beautiful, or perfect in any way. we do not have to try to be someone we are not in order to make friends. i believe that i can forge life-giving relationships by finding people who are both similar to myself and will challenge me. “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). this has definitely been true for me in the past two weeks or so. the beautiful thing about all the religious opportunities on campus is that i start to see the same people at different masses, at adoration, and at praise and worship. i have had dinner with them, went to the football game with them, and now we plan to go to religious events together. i found out about an eleven pm rosary at the grotto that happens every night and have met a wonderful group of people there. they are similar to me in that we have the same goal of becoming closer to god; however, they are more knowledgeable than me, so being around them helps me learn more. eleven pm rosary has become the highlight of my day, because praying can become a routine when there are other people to keep me accountable, and the socializing afterward has helped me make a good friend with whom i have had many deep discussions. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ lopez 4 i believe that my community should treat each other with love. implicit biases are easy to get in the way of showing love to others. “stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but they can also be used to empower and to humanize” ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichi, ted moreau fye week 7). instead of using the pre-formed judgments we may have to limit people in our minds, we should recognize these and instead use them as an opportunity to be open to meeting different kinds of people. in a community, people have to be kind to each other to thrive and to collaborate. this means that people should learn to listen to others, since everyone has their own story and background that has shaped who they are. learning about others can empower us to expand our ideas of the world. i want to be part of this love and do good by giving back to my community after i learn the skills to do so in college as an engineer. finally, i believe that i pursue truth through the lens of the catholic faith. as my framework, it helps me find god along the path of my life. father pete said, “let us never forget that we live in a world that is hungry” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). the context for this was to describe how we should help those in need around us, but it reminded me of the universal desire for truth. to find truth, i should seek it through the one who created me. as god knows all things, he will reveal to me whatever he chooses to reveal if i ask. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois integration week 8 nhat nguyen moreau 15 october 2021 i believe….. in the first few months here at notre dame i have been challenged in so many ways that challenge all aspects of my life including the beliefs and morals that have been instilled in me since i was a child. moving into a new environment without the guidance of my parents was very difficult; however my foundation beliefs and determination to succeed is something that has kept me moving forward in both my academic and athletic journey here at notre dame. personally i believe that notre dame is an amazing place that challenges their students in ways never before seen which allows one to flourish as an individual. the topic of being vulnerable is one that i believe is very important. throughout my entire life i have always strived for perfection whether it was on the field or in the classroom. i’ve always studied hard and with hard work and determination i rarely failed.however, this all changed when i got to college. in my calculus a class i received a c on the exam which is one of the lowest grades i’ve ever received. i was absolutely distraught, i allowed this exam to mentally destroy me which impacted my performance on the field for lacrosse, and in other classes. i truly struggled accepting the fact that i performed poorly on an exam. however, after a brief conversation with my coach she emphasized that i have to “fail forward” suggesting that failure is just room to grow and embrace the learning experience. in dr.brown's commentary she states “you can't numb hard feelings without numbing other emotions.” this pertains to the belief that one must be vulnerable to experience growth and prosperity. for example, when i received my test grade back i felt numb i didn't know how to react to such a horrible grade i tried blocking out all my emotions but in the end that made me more frustrated and upset. however after talking with my coach i realized this is just an opportunity to grow which showed me that i need to study harder and focus on school more than i have in previous years because the academics at this university are much more rigorous than i expected. although hard work and determination will allow one to succeed i believe that this situation demonstrates that the level of hard work may change when entering a new environment however ones failure isn't something horrible it's just an opportunity to evaluate and succeed in the new learning process. the importance of balance in college is something that is a ture key to success. when i first came to notre dame i was determined to be perfect in every aspect of school and lacrosse. however i quickly learned that this goal was nearly impossible; therefore i needed to find a balance. i thought that happiness and pleasure would come from being successful in the previous two areas i listed, however i realized that happiness comes from many other aspects rather than success. as a team we participate in many volunteering opportunities in order to raise money for different causes. as a result i found myself the happiest when we visited our fiffl teammate who is battling cancer. she was so overjoyed to meet us and was pleased with our company. the smile that appeared on her face while we visited her brought me true joy. this made me realize that i believe that happiness and pleasure comes from more than just success and prosperity in athletics or academics. in the video david brooks talks about how people must find a balance in life between success and overall happiness. brooks states that life isn't about being decorated in awards and experiencing success constantly but it's about finding a balance between being vulnerable to grow as an individual while experiencing success which will lead to happiness. this pertains to my situation because even though i wasn't experiencing success on the field or in the classroom during that particular week in the semester i was able to find peace and happiness when i was with our teammate because i felt as if my presence had an impact on her day which made me feel successful. framework and a daily routine can be the basics to learning and experiencing success. i believe that a framework can only truly find its purpose in life despite challenges and obstacles if one is able to stick to the basic routine and framework success will come through both prosperity and failure. in the first few weeks i struggled to find a routine/ balance between school work, exams, and practice which led to me struggling to get my work done , which then led to me not sleeping. the failures continued to build up but i had to stick to my belief that eventually everything would work out and i could only learn from my poor time management. father mccormick states in the video that “the greatest journey you will ever go on is the journey of self discovery. this quotation shows that framework is something that's essential to finding one's true purpose. perhaps that is religion, many individuals say that sticking true to one's faith allows them to discover their true purpose. personally i believe that if one is able to put the trust in god that everything happens for a reason they will discover who they truly are as a person through both success and failure. by embarrassing the struggle, if one is able to stick to a routine despite challenges and hardships they will experience true success along with the discovery of their purpose. relationships and friendships are an important factor in forming a healthy bond with one's peers which allows one to have a successful and healthy social life. as a child my parents always instilled in me that friends were people who cared about your well-being and as a group you would both grow as individuals if it was a healthy friendship. therefore i personally believe that healthy friendships are the ones that leave you with a smile on your face at the end of the day knowing that you both are growing as individuals together. as i entered college i noticed that many people talk behind each other's backs and many males are not loyal to their girlfriends who are not at notre dame. as a result of this experience i began to become aware of red flags that are signs of toxic relationships and friendships. for example taylor states in the article that “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” this quotation suggests the true meaning of friendships. personally with my teammates we always try to help each through tough times whether it's in school or on the field we all encourage one another to be the best players, students, and individuals we can possibly be. a way in which i strive to be a good friend is by giving positive encouragement to those around me who are struggling and in addition to this celebrate the mini successes in order to create a healthy and positive environment regarding friendships. one can find purpose in life through many things other than sports or academics. personally i believe that here at notre dame the sense of community, tradition, culture, and faith is what can help lead someone to finding their true self. being a pre-med major here at notre dame has made me question my purpose and what i truly want to do. the difficulty in my classes can sometimes discourage me and distract me from my end goal of pursuing a profession in the medical field. however, i know that in the end i really want to help people who are encountering some sort of issue medically. this idea is supported through the quotation when kevin grove says “you might bring the only hope that lasts.” this quotation shows me to keep persevering through the struggle because one day i can be the only hope someone has to keep going. my purpose as an individual in the future could be to help someone who is ill and in that situation it is my job to help them overcome this obstacle. also, here at notre dame there is an emphasis on giving back to those who need it most and perhaps our experiences here will allow us to grow and prosper to one day give back to those in need of our help. everyone views the world in a different way and one's experiences are what truly shapes who they are as a person. i believe that one's experiences and interaction with their environment is what shapes them as a person. for example, my experience at notre dame so far has been quite positive and it is just the beginning of my journey in order to discover who i am as an individual. i constantly reflect on what my parents taught me and my previous experiences at home with school and sports in order to maximise my potential as a student-athlete. from the website “where i am from” the author states that she wants people to tell a story about what events one has experienced that have shaped how they perceive the world around them. perhaps this shows that everyone comes from a different environment and their core beliefs and values are shaped based on their experiences in that environment. therefore from this one can conclude that at notre dame we are here to experience both success, failure, and traditio which are all aspects that will shape how we perceive the world around us. in the society we live in today there is both bias, racism, and discrimmination which is all influnced by the media on a negative way. personally, i believe that sterpotypes are a current issue in society that needs to receive more attention. at notre dame the 2025 class seems to be the most diverse class to ever come through the university. the diversity i noticed creates a stronger culture and bond between peers because each and every student is able to bond over their experiences and stories from their unique cultures. in the video “danger of a single story” the speaker says “if you only focus on the negative stories it will flatten your experience and overlook the other stories that form you.” this quotation illustrates how stereotypes impact society in such a negative way. only having one perspective creates bias and discrimmination which creates a distinct divide amongst a community which creates a toxic culture; something that you would never see at notre dame. in the future i will continue to interact with my peers and learn about their experiences as students and individuals here at this university to expand my knowledge on culture and the diversity of our class, moreau fye integration 1 quinn elemer barbaza mr. andrew whittington moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 inner peace: a personal query it is necessary to preface this reflection by confessing that my beliefs and basis of living have changed drastically in the short time that i have been enrolled at the university of notre dame. i believe these changes to be for the better, though the person i may have been in the past would likely disagree. regardless, these beliefs have helped me know myself and the people around me better, beginning with honor. i value honor in the highest, and i believe that honor and respect are a basis upon which relationships should be built. furthermore i believe in the importance of personal morality, not group morality. i live by a moral code i have developed over time and i strongly believe that doing so is a necessity to being truly happy. due to that moral code, i believe in truth and genuineness, what you see is what you get. i will not pretend to be anything more or less than i am out of fairness and respect for myself and the people around me. i believe that empathy should predicate interaction and that there is no kindness too great to be forgone. finally, i believe in second chances, and thirds, and fourths. i believe that the highest crime one can commit against another is preventing them from changing. the culmination of these beliefs has led me to live a more complete and happy life in which i am at peace. i have not been able to say that until now. a great deal of that peace has formed from my learning to be genuine. being what i am without shame is something that has taken a lot of work and something that i still struggle with today, albeit not as much as before. i have always valued honesty and being myself, but i haven’t known who that is until recently. i realized the importance of letting down walls from week two. “you have to surrender something outside of yourself, to gain strength within yourself” (“should you live for your resume...or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week 2). this quote from brooks personifies the realization i had about genuineness. i had to give up my security, the walls i put up to avoid being vulnerable, in order to become who i actually was. who i actually am. this shaped my belief that it is important to accept and therefore live with my flaws and vulnerabilities, which is why i believe that being genuine is so important to life. this was proven to me once again when we discussed vulnerabilities back in week one. listening to the video in week one opened my eyes, especially when dr. brown said “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging, believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week 1). i did not feel worthy of such belonging until i lived true to myself. this realization allowed me to become more genuine https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=5 and that gave me a peace that only came from accepting my vulnerabilities. all of this shaped my ability to be more vulnerable and therefore more genuine, which grants me peace through life. genuineness is one part of the moral code i formed about myself, which i choose to live by. i often wondered where my view of morality formed, as some of it is rather new as i have discovered while other aspects have been prevalent my whole life. father pete stated this perfectly in the discussion in week three. father pete says “there was no way i would have made it home that day without the help of others” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week 3). so many different people have shaped my beliefs and my morality, from my father to my choir director to my baseball coach. my choir teacher, mr. grier, taught me about chivalry and honor, what it is to be a man, and that being a gentleman means taking care of everyone around you. it means that you treat the people around you better, not that you get treated better. my baseball coach taught me how to understand other people’s flaws and how to work with them. my father told me “you see everyone here, quinn? everyone needs food. everyone eats” (“where i'm from” by moreau fye week 6). for better or for worse, my family played a massive role in my morality. they shaped my views on equality and fairness by directly teaching me them. they also greatly influenced my belief that everyone deserves a second chance because they never gave me one. my family still holds my mistakes over my head, and that is why i promised never to do so to someone else. this belief and others are born of adversity more than anything else. i hated how i was treated and manipulated by my family, which caused me to form the opposite opinion: there is always room for forgiveness that i will give openly. this strongly correlates with what we discussed in week four, where i was interested in the line, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). yes, this quote is limited to friendships, but it applies to all relationships in life. i did not have a positive middle or high school experience. but this lack of health in my relationships caused me to work to prevent anyone else from feeling that alone. because of that, i strongly believe in second chances. the last, and possibly biggest aspect of my personality and beliefs is my adherence to a moral code. i don’t believe in group morality; i find it entirely too circumstantial and influenced by context. i have already explored the origins of my beliefs, but the importance i place with personal morality. one of the reasons i stick so closely to this is because for the longest time, this code was all i had. my family took most of my self-esteem, pride, self-respect, and personality and buried it under expectations and mantras. in that time, the only thing i felt that was truly me was my moral code. it was one of the only things that got me through the past couple years. despite all of this, i would not trade it because this is part of me. as fr. kevin grove says “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5). this concept is a major part of my beliefs. i bear a lot of sorrow and guilt, but i wouldn't trade it for anything else. i have finally made peace with myself and that past is a part of it. i am aware of how limiting this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://docs.google.com/document/d/1t8gowktmi0gzcgauhxeosjvmxgxl-omtb9klwmos7h0/edit https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 approach can be. as the ny times says, “the same processes that make people smart can also make them biased” (“how to think about "implicit bias” by payne, niemi, and doris moreau fye week 7). the process that helped me survive can sometimes prevent me from seeing the morality in others if it differs from mine. this is why i try to always incorporate acceptance and empathy into my own code. when one adheres so strongly to a central idea there must be fluidity in that idea, else that person ends up alone. i ended up alone for the first part of my life, mostly due to the fact that my moral conduct did not allow for anyone else’s. now, as i’ve learned more about the world and the people around me, i try to see other perspectives as much as possible and live with differences around me. all of this combines to shape who i am and what i believe in. i am, as always, a culmination of all my experiences and the influences of the people around me, and i could not be more grateful for where i am and the people around me. this is a truly special place that brings out the best in people. with my beliefs and a deeper understanding of myself and those around me, i cannot wait for what is to come. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ fye 10101: integration 1 mr. andrew whittington moreau fye 10101: integration 1 october 15 2021 my ever-expanding scope of life “i am from sleeping in a room with two brothers all my life; two more down the hall” (“week 6 qqc identifying influences” by moreau fye week six). as the youngest of five boys, i have always been expected to perform up to par. with an age gap of 10 years, by the time i was born, my brothers had already done most things a child could do. as the youngest, i found myself comfortable in most situations because my brothers had paved a nice path for me by keeping a good reputation. however, at least one of them had performed exceptionally well at most activities i participated in. while this seems like more of a good thing for me in that i had better relations with certain teachers and the likes, it eventually began to wear on me due to just being “little christy,” as i was affectionately known by most of my brothers’ friends. eventually, during the middle school to a new highschool transition, i really found myself searching for who i was. i wanted to look within myself in order to see who “luke” was, not who “little christy” was. this search is what i believe to have marked the starting point of my own life. next, a new chapter of my life had begun when i wanted to further develop my true self. it is easy to stay comfortable behind the persona of who people within society want you to be, but it is much more difficult to allow yourself to be vulnerable. as dr. brené brown reasoned, vulnerability is our path to finding ourselves within society: “in order for connection to happen, we have to be vulnerable,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). although this is much easier said than done, i have found the reward to be peace of mind as i have tried working on revealing myself to others more and more. naturally, being yourself is something that poses various difficulties due to society. so often are we urged to do things that deviate from who we really are simply because of societal norms. i struggled with this idea in highschool particularly because of the push and pull of popularity and not getting the wrong person upset with you. however, when i did this, it only pulled me further away from who i truly was, which helped me realize that “in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself,” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two). despite the paradox, i believe that it is essential to disconnect from who society wants you to be in order to find who you truly are. once i started realizing this, my life became a lot more about what i wanted myself to be rather than what others wanted. regardless of the fact that my highschool career was spliced by the covid-19 pandemic, the isolated second half allowed me to reflect on the thought of what i wanted myself to be. throughout this time, i went to a monastery in arizona located in a remote part of the state. it allowed me to reflect on where i was in the world, at what point in my life i was in, and what i wanted for the next few years of my life. i understood that i had to let god guide my life. my time in the desert can be summarized by the words from a notre dame student, “lead by faith, not by sight,” (“text: "student reflections on faith" (curated by campus ministry)” by lala moreau fye week three). i believe that keeping god at the center of one’s life is vital to finding oneself, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing and understanding that we must lead our life by god’s will, not ours, is essential to doing just that. what followed my mini-revelation was the longing for finding like-minded people. coming from a catholic school in chicago that was well-known, a lot of my friends only chose to go there because their wealthy parents wanted them to attend. this created a large discrepancy between my classmates and myself because i tried to use my catholic education to grow intellectually and spiritually, but many of my friends had no interest in doing so. as a result, i felt an urge to discover people that saw the world the way i did. i wanted friends that would care about me beyond if i were with them on friday night or not. i began to look high and low for those like-minded people, but regardless of how elusive they may seem to be, it proved that my friends were not truly caring for me, bringing another realization: “attention is the rarest form of love,” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). i believe that holding the same expectations for everyone will only disappoint your own self. different people act in different ways, and you should therefore hold expectations in a relative manner. by now, i was well aware of the path of personal development that i was on. i had learned how to be my own person and step out of the shadow of my older brothers. i had learned how to interact with different people and how to cultivate my own beliefs regardless of what others around me pushed. i was becoming my own person, travelling my own journey. i began to look beyond the narrow scope of my own perspective and attempted to gain a wider one by looking through the lens of others. i learned that everyone is on a similar path, and the only way i should act is how i would want others https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/modules/items/105964 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/modules/items/105964 to interact with me, bringing me to one of the more profound quotes i have come across: “to treat others the way that you want to be treated, to be of service to others, and frankly, to help any one any way, any how you can, simply because you can,” ("2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i believe that being an aide unto others is one of the most noble things you can do. not noble in the forgetful and overlooking eyes of society, but noble in the eyes of god. if it is within your power to help someone, you must do everything you can. since, i have tried living a life of happiness. from my development outlined above, i have realized that everyone is unique in their own way simply due to their own experiences. when i arrived at notre dame, this truth has not only been more visible, but it has helped me connect with people and learn from my peers who, likewise, have their own unique experiences. as a result, i have only begun on the path to cultivating a wider scope a wider perspective through which i may see the world, which agrees with the statement: “knowledge is conveyed not through facts but through emotional experiences” (“how to destroy truth” david brooks, ny times moreau fye week seven). i believe that we, as human beings, have an obligation to learn as much about each other as we can. if we choose to go down this path of lifelong learning and attempt to expand our perspective throughout our lives, we will find that virtue, most of all peace, will follow. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/modules/items/106022 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare integration assignment i am searching for a place of belonging at notre dame. as i sat in your class, i listened to you talk about the experience that you and your daughter had while at notre dame, and i am looking to have an experience of unity and pride like yours. the past couple of weeks have been so busy, as i’ve been studying for midterms, quizzes, grinding homework, writing essays, and i feel as if i have not been able to form the connections which my peers have while here. i have a really close group of friends, but people in my dorm feel foreign and alienated. i feel like all i have time to do is go back to my room, study, and then go to bed. the video by rene brown, shows how being vulnerable can help to establish trust with others. i also find what i am searching for through prayer, spending time with god and seeking for spiritual enlightenment as fr. pete mccormick (c.s.c) highlights in his speech (“the role of faith in our story”). i forge life giving relationships by being open and honest with others and with myself. throughout my life, i have met hundreds of people who i would consider an acquaintance or a friend, and what separates them from each other is whether or not i felt the person with whom i was interacting shared my desire for a healthy relationship of give and take. a healthy relationship is essential to forming a life long relationship which will give fulfillment and happiness to both people. as is shown in the article (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships”)-the red flag campaign-, a beneficial and healthy friendship depends on mutual trust, clearly set boundaries, concern for one another, and the ability to respect one another’s opinions and actions. while at notre dame, i have formed three really good life giving relationships, with people who respect my academic and moral integrity, people who are always good listeners and willing to give me time to myself when i need it, and people who i would happily help in times of need. life giving relationships are not easy to form, and they require time and patience, but they are well worth the effort. i believe that my purpose is to serve others and to do the will of god. after watching (“two notre dames, your holy cross education”) (fr. kevin grove, c.s.c). i gained a new appreciation for the blend between excelling academically and maintaining a high moral standard. i would say that these two principles heavily influence my root beliefs, which are: work tirelessly and cheerfully, do unto others as you would have done unto you, treat all people with the essential dignity and respect that we all deserve, etc. at notre dame and in this course, i have learned the importance of looking outside of my personal bubble and seeing how i can help communities in need. notre dame trains students to use the skills which they have learned in the classroom, and give them a practical application to improving our world through activism, charity, and volunteering. perhaps the greatest measure of one’s character is not its current state, but how it has developed over the years. “the danger of the single story” (chimamanda ngozi adichie) was an interesting way to look into my own growth as a person. i grew up in a safe, upper middle class suburb, and i didn’t understand many of the problems and plights of other people. as such, my world view was limited to my little bubble, and i never empathized with those less fortunate than myself. i always assumed that anyone could pull themselves up by their bootstraps and become a successful entrepreneur, doctor, lawyer, nurse, dentist, engineer, writer, etc; this is america, and i thought any mountain could be climbed, but i was wrong. once at notre dame, i’ve seen how the opportunities at academic rigor and a safe and stable learning environment were not afforded to many people. i saw how there was such a large gap in the opportunities for excelling in the world between african americans and whites. i saw how my single story was too narrow and whimsical to take into account the disadvantages and struggles of those across the country. as such, i have grown by trying to better widen my perspective on issues such as equality in education and the job market. i have become more aware of the racial disparities in wages, living conditions, and academic opportunities. i no longer employ a single story, but i have many stories which blend together to create a person who has grown to be considerate of many more backgrounds and plights. responsibilities are something which cannot and should not be avoided or deflected in life. to do one’s duty as a person is to be a responsible and giving individual who seeks to enhance the greater good. one video that really stuck out to me was “it’s on us nd-the three d’s of being an active bystander”. whie this video was in the context of preventing sexual harassment, i think that it could be used in other contexts as well. we have a responsibility to take action when we see someone in need. for example, if someone is being bullied for any reason, simply standing by and doing nothing is not acceptable. you must, as a responsible person, use your words to help the person in need by changing the situation. as said by green.nd, “no one is expected to do everything, but everyone is expected to do something”. if we see instances of harassment or bullying, we should insert ourselves into the situation and take a stand against intimidation and injustice. from reading above, it becomes clear that i have found my experience at notre dame to be one of enlightenment, discovery, and growth. as time goes on, i hope to further these virtues which i have obtained, and i hope to even further broaden my perspective. moreau has given me time to reflect on my own upbringing and has allowed me to ask essential questions about myself and my beliefs. it has also helped to solidify my understanding of notre dame’s culture and mission, something with which i truly resonate. integration one kevin mccarthy kevin mccarthy moreau integration one thigpen 10 october 2021 my experience at the university of notre dame thus far, college has been quite the whirlwind. i have had to get acclimated to a new setting, meet new people, and do well in all of my classes, all in the past seven weeks. at certain points, it all felt quite overwhelming, however i wouldn’t trade the experience for the world. at the end of the day, being at the university of notre dame has helped me grow tremendously already as a person, and i cannot wait to spend the next four years here. being at notre dame, i have felt as if i have been able to formulate certain foundational beliefs. for one, i believe that thus far, i have been searching for a new place to call home. moving away from home to college was a much needed change of scenery. i had lived in a small town all of my life, and i knew everything and everyone in that town. it has been a wonderful experience meeting new people and having the ability to experience new things on my own. my parents and i have disagreed on numerous things in the past, and in the end it was ultimately their side i would have to take as i lived under their roof. however, at college i am free to do as i desire. however, i can never forget that “i’m from parents that love and care for me, people who have always wanted to see me succeed” and “i’m from siblings who love to fight, but at the end of the day always get along” (“where i’m from” poem moreau fye week 6). i love my parents and my siblings, and it is wonderful to know that they love me back. however, in order for me to truly find who i am as a person, i had to venture away from the small town of little silver and find a home at the university of notre dame. when talking to my parents, i now refer https://docs.google.com/document/u/1/d/1pzwe15ahyiudrwpjad3fcjtes3oonyvz9xnm6qjdvyw/edit to sorin college as home. i have been accepted into a community. i feel as if i have truly been able to dedicate my time to helping others and building relationships as well. on monday nights me and some friends play interhall football, and this team truly has become a family that isn’t blood related. i have searched for, and i have found a home away from home. the most important thing about finding a new home is formulating new relationships as well. i believe that in order to formulate life-giving relationships i have to be my true self and be open with communication. when trying to be extroverted and outgoing, it can be possible to feel afraid. when you ask people about belonging, “they'll tell you their most excruciating experiences of being excluded” and when “you ask people about connection the stories they told me were about disconnection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week 1). many people, regardless of age, gender, or ethnicity experience shame at one point in their lives. this shame is universal, yet people still try to hide it and push their true emotions deep down inside of themselves. however, at notre dame i feel as if the community has been truly welcoming of all people, regardless of their fears or who they are. thus far, i feel as if i can talk about anything with anyone. no one has put me down, and i have never put anyone else down. in order to form new relationships, i have seen the importance of being vulnerable. for example, in my engineering design class, i sat at a table with a bunch of random kids i have never seen in my life before on the first day of class. soon enough, we all got to talking and by being open about my likes and dislikes, as well as not being afraid to show them who i truly am, real friendships were formulated amongst all of us. these are people i still talk to today, and it all started with me allowing myself to not be afraid of what they might think of me. by being my true self and not changing anything about me, i have been able to develop friendships with people who i want to be around, people who impact me positively. the most important way to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 develop valuable relationships is to be vulnerable as well as not being afraid to communicate by initiating any kind of conversation. being at such an amazing university, i believe that i have a greater purpose than just looking at books and solving homework problems. i believe that one of my purposes on this campus is to be there for others when they need me the most, not only at notre dame but in the greater community as well. it can often feel as if “we have been swimming in waters that feel bottomless, but on such occasions our toes just touch the bedrock. and as love dawns, so does our sight.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). regardless of one who may be, they have most likely felt alone and dismayed at one point or another in their lives. i know that i can sometimes have a pessimistic attitude towards certain situations, and i know how badly this attitude can make me feel. this is why i believe that it’s so important to be there for others. you never know when someone is going through something, and you never know when someone may need a shoulder to lean on. it is a necessity for me to be someone another person can count on at any given time, and that is why i am always available to my friends and family to talk about anything at any time. it is so important for me to keep the faith in my life, and when others have no faith, i want to be the person that gives them at least a little hope for the future. i love to help inspire those around me, to help them preserve through their problems. it is always important to have people alongside yourself. i believe that i can grow spiritually and morally by immersing myself in a positive environment. i love interacting with people who are going to challenge me to be better every day, regardless of who they may be. the best kind of relationships “are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). i have had my fair share of relationships that do not leave me with a smile on my face. i have had very poor friendships in the past, relationships that have involved manipulation and insulting language. these relationships are not fun for either party. it is so important to me that i surround myself with positive people, people that i want to be around. it is an integral part of my experience thus far that i remain true to myself and change who i am for no person. i always try to seek out the people that will make me better, and i have been so fortunate thus far to formulate great relationships with great people. being surrounded by people who have a positive influence on me, i feel as if i can have a positive impact on the community. i believe that i am made to be in service to others with my peers. carla harris sums it up quite well in my opinion when she states that “ [she was] a product of catholic schools… where [she] learned… to be of service to others and frankly to help anyone, anyway, anyhow [one] can” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). even though i was not a student at a catholic school until this year, my catholic upbringing taught me this lesson a long time ago. one of my favorite parts of high school was providing food for low income families that were in need of relief during quarantine. every saturday morning, my friends and i would participate in this organization, called companeros de comida. it was a wonderful and rewarding experience using my blessings to help spread good in the community. i love to continue this practice here as i am excited to soon be a part of the catholic worker breakfast for sorin college. it is so important to me that i help out as much as i can. this does not always need to be a volunteering opportunity for me however. something as https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 simple as helping a fellow peer work through a difficult math problem brightens my day. i love to help in any shape or form possible. even though the notre dame community is dedicated to unity and helping each other out, there is still some progress that can be made. implicit bias is still prevalent today and i believe that the notre dame community should address this bias to create a truly welcoming community. one reason people on both the right and the left “are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7). in society today, there is a lot of division and people refuse to listen to the opinions of others because many believe that the opinions of others hold no merit. this notion is completely false. it is so important to me that i truly hear the other person’s point of view, and realize that what i think may be wrong. other’s opinions can be enlightening and may lead me to the real truth as well as show me why i was initially wrong. unless we truly listen to each other, we can never reach our full potential as a community. i have of course shut other people down because i disagreed with them in the past, and this was wrong of me to do. i have grown and seen the importance of actually listening to others. once i started listening, my life has completely changed for the better. this will have to come in time for all as maturity is a large part of the truth. in order for us to truly find out what’s real, it is necessary to hear everyone’s beliefs and collectively decide what is right and wrong. it can often be quite difficult to choose the moral high ground when there are certain irresistible temptations. life and greed sometimes get the best of us. society can potentially turn us into “shrewd animals who treat life as a game, and [one can] become a cold, calculating creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity where [they] realize there's a difference between [their] desired self and [their] actual self” (“should you live for our resume or your eulogy” by https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim david brooks moreau fye week 2). in the world that we all live in today, it can be tough to find a balance between doing what you personally want to do, and doing what is asked of you. at times, i have found it difficult for me to balance my social life and work. however, in the end staying focused on my studies and rewarding myself by spending time with friends, i have been able to find a good balance. i believe that it is always important to choose what your own heart desires. true happiness and everlasting joy can only be achieved through oneself. it is always important to put yourself first and foremost, even if it feels that society is frowning upon you. in my short few weeks at the university of notre dame, i truly have learned so much about myself. i have been able to flourish as an independent (young) adult and i would not trade my experiences for the world. this place truly is my home away from home, and i am already looking forward to my return back to campus next friday. purpose and responsibility purpose and responsibility in this eight paragraph paper i am going to identify seven of my root beliefs as inspired by the moreau curriculum thus far. each paragraph will begin with an explanation of one of my root beliefs, then i will discuss how the moreau curriculum has deepened or inspired that belief, and lastly i will reflect on how that belief influences my character and actions. firstly, i believe that i am worthy of love, respect, and belonging. i think that self-love is super important and it’s really central to who i am; i am confident in myself and my abilities and my future because i know myself and i love myself, and that is something i didn’t come to by myself. berne brown said “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0). in my life i have developed really powerful loving relationships that have helped me realize my worth, and i am infinitely grateful for those people. this belief of self-love and self-worth affects my actions because i don’t overly seek validation or love or attention from other people or unhealthy sources since i already get that from myself. i believe that actions are more important than words. this means that i believe what you chose to do with your life and your skills and gifts is extremely important; it does not matter what you think or what you say or what you believe, what matters is what you actually do for others. this also means that i believe in doing things to demonstrate your potential and strength and integrity instead of talking about it or letting others talk about it. i realized this belief through the resume vs eulogy discussion, as it got me to think about what i would want or expect people to say about me after i am gone (david brooks “should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” week 2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&feature=emb_imp_woyt). i would want them to talk about what i did, who i helped, what contributions i made to the world and to their lives. this belief of actions over words is seen in my character and actions by my commitment to my academics and the causes i care about and also in my relationships with others. i believe god put me here for a reason. i am a person of faith and my relationship with god is really personal to me and my religion is really central to the way i view the world and my purpose. in one of the videos we watched for this section father pete said “at the core of oneself is the very presence of god” and i thought that was really beautiful as it really aligns with my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&feature=emb_imp_woyt image of god (father pete “the role of faith in our story” week 3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=emb_imp_woyt). i really enjoyed talking in class about our own experiences of faith. i was nervous but also really happy to tell my small group about my faith. my belief that god put me here for a reason affects my actions and character in that i go through every day and every decision with a deep purpose and that gives me assurance and confidence in myself and in something more powerful than myself. i believe that we all have a responsibility to care for others. by this i mean that we all have a responsibility to care about inequality, injustice, environmental issues, systemic issues, and social issues even if they don’t necessarily apply directly to our lives. for week four we watched this video of these football players advocating for sexual assault awareness; they said “it’s on us to be our brothers and sisters keeper” (nd football “it’s on us” week 4) and i thought that was really important and powerful. my belief in common responsibility affects my character and actions because i deeply care about social issues, inequalities, and injustices and it is important to me to be informed on these things and be advocating and informing others. i believe that there is power and meaning in my distinct experience and perspective. i do come from a place of privilege; and it is easy for me to pinpoint all the opportunities that i have had in my life simply because of where i was born, the amount of money my family had, the education level of my family, the color of our skin, and the schools my parents were able to send me to. these things have affected my perspective, but still coming from a very mixed income area i was also able to see first hand systemic socioeconomic and racial inequalities which have also shaped my perspective. carla harris said “your authenticity is your distinct and competitive advantage” and i thought that was very profound and applicable to how i view my own purpose and perspective (carla harris “notre dame 2021 commencement speech” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 week 5). this affects my actions because i actively try to look at things from other perspectives when thinking about different issues or different things happening in the world, since too often people can only see things from where they are and i think that's a really big issue in our country. i believe that the world is beautiful. i find beauty and divine intelligence in our ability to use language and art, the diversity of experiences, histories and narratives, love, grief, loss, faith, science, and common human experiences and emotions. i really like poetry so i loved getting to write the “where i’m from poem” week 6, it made me really appreciative of art and poetry as a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=emb_imp_woyt https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 means of expressing divine sentiments. my root belief in the beauty of the world affects my character and actions because it makes me a more appreciative and optimistic person in the face of hardship and it gives me inspiration and perspective about my role here on earth. lastly, i believe that things are always more complicated than they seem. this is the attitude i have always had academically and i think it has just become a very important part of how i learn and interpret new information. this ties into last week's material because chimamanda adichie’s ted talk was all about how stereotypes and misconceptions arise from people making assumptions and oversimplifications of issues, cultures, histories, and communities. she said, “when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise,” and i think that is a really beautiful way to put it (chimamanda ngozi adichie “the danger of a single story” https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story week 7). my root belief in persisting complexity affects my actions and character because it drives me to understand things deeply instead of taking information at face value and it humbles me by reminding me that there is always much much more to know. so those are seven of my root beliefs, i noticed that mostly all of them have to do with either the idea of purpose or responsibility, so in conclusion my two most core beliefs are the idea of divine purpose and individual responsibility to others, god, and the world. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration 1 bernsten the family that is notre dame as a school of love “those who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging”(the power of vulnerability by brene brown-moreau fye week one. i believe that i am searching for belonging. i never doubted or questioned the love my family and friends had for me back home. in many ways, that unconditional love has instilled in me a strong sense of love and belonging, and i do believe that i am worthy of it. however, it also makes one realize how much they are missing when they do not have it. here at notre dame, there is immense potential for finding those people, but i also find myself being very cautious with who i spend time with. this belief is challenged when i see friend groups forming without me that i have spent time with, or when academic work takes me away from socializing as much as i would like during the week. this belief has influenced my actions by motivating me to be more social, more inclusive, and more disciplined. i had convinced myself that being outgoing would be enough to find that belonging, but what i have realized is that i must also be inclusive. i cannot always depend on others to create the reality i want to live in. “rest assured, you will eventually be dragged into a dramatic situation with this friend and they will definitely talk about you behind your back”(5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship, by olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week 4). i believe that i form life-giving relationships by being vulnerable, being inclusive, and being genuine. i believe this because this is how i connect with people, and how i believe humans want to connect with others at their core. i have come to believe this because i have had several different types of relationships. i have had my best friends since first grade or before. two of them went to different high schools, and by senior year none of them went to school with me. throughout, our friendship levels ebbed and flowed, but by the end, i was closer with them than i had ever been. i believe that we continued to gravitate towards each other because we valued that inclusiveness, sincerity, and kindness present in each other. even new relationships, romantic and platonic, have shown me this same thing when certain people become attached to me after a short period of time. this belief has been challenged in college when i am left out of things, despite putting effort and thought into the relationships with the people excluding me. it makes me wonder if there is something else that i am not offering as a friend that does not cause them to gravitate towards me. however, it may also be that we are not as compatible as i wish we were, and that just has to be okay. this belief informs my actions by challenging me to be emulate the behavior that special people have shown me and that i wish to see in others. “you don’t have a commitment to tasks that would take more than a lifetime to commit”(should you live for your resume or your eulogy, david brooks, moreau fye week 2). i believe that my purpose is to live for something more than myself. i also believe that this purpose not only gives more to those around you, but that it also increases your own joy as well. i believe this because i have seen it in my grandfather, who was described at his funeral as not only a good father and husband but also as an exceptional person. not everybody who is good is exceptional. my grandfather was a public defender, alderman, mayor, realtor, and university fundraiser in my hometown. he touched thousands of peoples’ lives for the better, and raised children that have continued to be forces of good in this world. not only did help others, but anyone who knew him could definitively say that he lived a life of joy and happiness. i believe that the two are directly related; a selfless lifestyle is truly selfish. this belief has not been challenged much from my perspective. i do believe that a certain amount of selfish behavior is needed to put yourself in a position of power and security, but only so that you may have the largest impact through your goodness. this belief has actively influenced my motivations and therefore my actions. i did not come to school to make money, but to find what i love to study. i remain undecided in my major, and have talked to several professors and students about their own paths to find my own. i believe that by doing what i love, i will find joy and be able to help others in the process. “i am from lawn place, my heart there will remain”(where i’m from poem, isaac bernsten, moreau fye week 6). i believe that i pursue truth by consulting the core convictions and experiences i had in my childhood, as well as the reason, emotion, and intuition i have regarding a topic. i believe this because i think my childhood was unique. the culture of happiness, love, humor, flexibility, responsibility, and intelligence that my family fostered is something that i do not take for granted because i have seen its uniqueness even among my closest friends and their families. this is also another belief of mine that has remained unshaken and unchallenged; if anything, my belief in this has only grown. i believe that the love i was raised with allows me to understand the world and truth in a very human way. this belief informs my actions directly by informing my morals. the truths that i pursue are ones that i believe are logical and moral, or at least can be used to moral ends. i then try to live by those truths through action. “families are schools in which we learn to love”(sorin letter to moreau, father sorin, moreau fye week 5). i believe that i have responsibility for serving others. it is easy to lose sight of the things we dreamed for ourselves as children; the things we wished to change in the world. where there is love, however, there is the understanding that love does not exist everywhere and that it is our duty to serve others in realizing a new future for them. i believe the university of notre dame should be a family in which what i have talked about-belonging, relationships, purpose, and love-is the context for everything that is taught, for a true family is a school in which we learn to love. akerman jacqueline akerman taylor kelly moreau 3 december, 2021 using my past to shape my future my time here at the university of notre dame has already taught me and changed me more than i could have ever imagined and for that, i am grateful. i found myself lost, running into many unexpected experiences–both good and bad, formative and damaging– that have changed me for the better. i have found more of a focus on faith that i had lost at the beginning of the semester; i have learned my new study habits and ways to adjust to my new academic schedule; and i have become much more involved on notre dame’s campus, which i found hard to do at the beginning of the semester, even since the last integration assignment. overall, i would say that i have matured quite rapidly from who i was at the beginning of the semester to who i am now. to summarize, i have learned to focus on how to forge ahead to reach my own goals rather than prioritizing what other people expected of me, which actually held me back more than i realized, reached a comfortable level of vulnerability compared to the start of the semester, and used the help of the lord to treat my neighbors with more respect and awareness so as to create stronger communities and relationships around me. at week nine, we discussed imposter syndrome, the feeling of everyone doing better than you and competing with you. this is exactly how i felt for the majority of my first semester in college, that i was procrastinating too much and everyone else was multiple steps ahead of me, that i was doing the worst in the class, no matter how high my grades were, etc. this has been a common theme for me throughout my past life; no matter how large the success, i often felt that others reached the same goal, if not, a bigger and better one. however, from a source we were given, a quote stuck out to me that made me realize why i think like this: “people who are highly accomplished or skilled think others are equally skilled” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox ted-ed moreau fye week 9). this is exactly how i felt at the beginning of this semester. especially being in gateway, it feels more like a competition due to the small size of the group and the fact that we all have the same goal of getting to notre dame full time. as the semester progressed, i began to realize that there is absolutely no point in comparing myself to my classmates because of two reasons: we all have different majors, which means our workloads are comparatively different, and we all learn in different ways to reach the same result, some students not needing to study as much as others. this is a community of all different people with different habits and in order to get the best out of this environment, i learned to use the differences we all have and combine it with my own to shape new habits of my own and learn from those around me. these communities are “pockets of possibility” waiting to be made (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week 11).this moreau course has helped me realize that “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau week 9). comparing yourself to others will drag you more behind than if you focused on yourself and improved your own ways of studying and retaining material, reaching your goals and formulating your future plans without worrying about what everyone else was doing or how they were doing it. being surrounded by such a wonderful group of people that i call my classmates, i have realized that i find myself most content and less stressed when i have them by my side. it is important to surround yourself with people who will be happy with your successes and you with theirs. it is important to form a strong supportive community around you who can comfort you and contribute to your success. as emery bergmann said in her article, “loneliness is often paired with self-blame and self criticism,” so to have people around you who are there to bring you up rather than compete with you can make all the difference (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann, ny times moreau fye week 9). i am someone who likes to deal with things on my own, cry in private, and find a solution that works best for me. i have definitely experienced brokenness in many realms in my past, and in all of those experiences, i went to myself to take care of my emotions rather than reaching out to others for help or comfort. coming into and including the beginning of the first semester i relied on myself too much, causing me to have no vulnerability and a feeling of not needing to change or be more flexible. as a result, i found myself not needing to be a part of a community or not having the desire to change or learn more about others. especially with the help of my moreau class, i recognized that this was an issue that needed to change. now, i see myself as a much more vulnerable and open person because i learned that in order to meet all these new people and for them to meet me in a meaningful way, it is important that i place trust in them. something that stuck out to me in a source for week 10 was this quote by kirsten helgeson: “hearts are breakable and it’s a very good thing...because it allows you to grow and expand and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week 10). connecting with your own emotions and becoming flexible with your own story will better enable you to put the broken pieces from your past back together in order to forge ahead at a quicker rate. it is also important to realize that just like you have dealt with brokenness, those around you have also dealt with the same, some to a much higher extent. from week 11, i have concluded that this is what community is about: being aware of those around you, learning from them while also keeping their best interest at heart, in order to avoid any miscommunication, hatred, and judgement. i have learned to be someone that my friends can go to to open up to in hopes that they will be willing to do the same for me. “hatred poisons everything. “change is more possible when we hear different voices” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal moreau fye week 11). yet we seem not to see the danger,” which makes it even much more imperative to have our words speak of kindness and comfort (“wesley theological seminary 2021 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). and this is what we, specifically as catholics, should already know and practice. i have had a very consistent, monotone, if you will, background in my all-catholic, private-school past where i felt as though i was in my own bubble, secluded from real life problems and protected from any form of bullying or inappropriate conduct. as a result, when faced with so many people from so many different backgrounds, cultures, and ways of going about the academic environment here at college, i am amazed and almost shocked by everything i’m learning from those around me and how it compares to my past school experience. everyone has their own backgrounds, whether it be where they were raised, how they were raised, what kind of school they went to, or even something as small as family life. different backgrounds does not mean different planets; therefore, it is important to not treat others who are different, not like aliens who do not belong, but rather the same as we would treat everyone else, making an effort to create such wonderful communities (“with voices ture snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week 11). we can create a wonderful, inspiring, and interesting community if we all work towards inclusivity, as that is the beautiful part of a community. i have learned that it is important to understand this going into any new friendship, relationship, or community and to not shy away from learning more about others, treating them the same as i want to be treated, and forming strong, diverse communities and connections with an open mind rather than making assumptions before getting to know people. visiting notre dame as a young teen, i found the community of nd different from any other college campus or environment; it is strong, it is true, and there is no other place i would like to be. moving forward into college, i know i will have to face even more challenges than i have thus far in my first semester of college at the university of notre dame. i know to do this, i need christ’s help and guidance, because it is when we begin to doubt christ’s presence in our lives and lose hope that temptation is the strongest (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). at the beginning of the semester, i witnessed what it was like to go about my school days and weekends forgetting jesus, which left me with a feeling of internal stress and a loss of motivation. i was utterly lost in the craziness of the new environment, knowing i was missing something, but not knowing where to go or how i could be helped. after starting to visit the grotto, becoming a lector at the basilica, and praying more frequently, i felt complete peace and reassurance that things would slow down and i would find ways to do better. under the instruction of a holy cross education, i am being taught that “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ” and i feel that this will only get stronger as i go forth in my education (“hope-holy cross and christian education” fr. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week 12). after this transition from shifting away from christ to seeing his true helping power, i know that the lord will save me no matter how much i have sinned or how much i doubt his presence. looking back on the first semester, the majority of the memories are from when i was excelling in school, creating memories with friends, and realizing myself changing for the better. this was all after i seeked the lord’s help, which i have now learned, as a result, that i will need to keep on the same track keeping him close. looking forward to the second semester, i feel more confident that i will keep these values that i have so quickly obtained from the first semester. i look forward to reaching even more goals, setting the stakes higher for myself, and finalizing who i am physically, mentally, and spiritually fye 10101: integration 2 mr. whittington moreau fye 10101: integration 1 december 3, 2021 this stepping stone throughout my time here at the university of notre dame, i believe i am truly becoming who god has made me to be as a man for others. since arriving on campus, i have had to call the shots for myself as all of my classmates have as well. although i only speak for myself, i feel as if many of my peers have been able to inch closer towards the answers to questions that have lingered throughout our lives. one great aide to my personal development has been the moreau first year experience class. week after week, it has pushed me to think about my life, what i have and have not done, and who has surrounded me as i walk the path of life. as a result, i feel like my process of personal development has had an upward trajectory however slight or steep that has been guided by what i have encountered at notre dame. one of my favorite moments during my time at notre dame was when i attended the asian allure festival performance on a cold friday night. as my choice of majoring in engineering had given me a firm elbow to the ribs during this particular week, i had been planning on watching my friend, fang-rui, perform at the festival. though engineering was proving to be a hard horse on which to stay saddled, the concert brought me back to the chicago symphony orchestra performances i attended during highschool and brought about a revitalization within me. although engineering was difficult, the uplifting nature of the asian allure show reminded me of a lesson i had learned in moreau: “look at all of the options for living life and pick the ones that [i] feel called to” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). i understood i was not choosing between engineering and asian allure, but rather, i was choosing between working hard and taking the path of least resistance. knowing i was working hard and upholding my end of the bargain put my fatigued mind at peace it quelled my internal dissonance. my friend’s performance was beautiful, but my happiness with engineering was something that was previously ambiguous due to what college really held in store. now, i am happy to have greater internal clarity knowing that my hard work is worth it. during my time at notre dame, there has been no shortage of indicating where help can be directed towards so that people can alleviate certain problems, particularly in the socio-economic sphere. though there are many problems in the world, it seems as if notre dame is starting a new group every day in order to tackle the various obstacles presented to any community. from groups that try to feed the hungry to organizations that make strides at combating hate, there are many central challenges like poverty and certain social constructs within the community that hinder the lives of those affected. as someone who has been able to recognize a few of these challenges, it has helped me realize that when we allow ourselves to be unblinded, we can do so much more good than we were once able. this stemmed from my understanding of a reading from moreau that stated, “hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten hegelson moreau fye week 10). when i applied this to my life in the middle of the semester, i realized that my heart was all over the place. as i have tried piecing it back together, i have realized the unfortunate plethora of people in my life that are both so deserving and so desperately in need of a break. whether it be financially or emotionally, there exist people within our communities that are most worthy of https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ catching a break that simply never will. i have taken it upon myself to try and be the agent that spreads the goodness of god wherever i am able. until i am able to donate billions like elon musk, i feel i am morally obligated to devote myself to being that “break” for which someone has been waiting. as for my experience, i met a custodian inside one of the notre dame dorms. throughout the year i got to know that custodian very well and listened to what they had to say regarding their life. after a semester of listening to such a beautiful person tell me how unfortunate their life has been in certain times, i eagerly await the day i can do my part to make this world a better place. additionally, with the start of college brought the start of living with other people with which i was unfamiliar. for me, this does not bring the prospect of conflict, simply because i try to avoid conflict. not out of fear or anxiety, just because i would rather have no conflict with anyone than be stubborn and selfish by revealing my true feelings. although i have nice friends in my quad, they all seem to have an opinion about my roommate. more towards the beginning of the year, most comments were negative and i almost allowed myself to step into the same pitfall. however, at a certain point in the year, i tried to look at the roommate situation in the best light i could. as i look back on that period, i realized a point of emphasis from one of the moreau articles, “my concept of community must be capacious enough to embrace everything.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). despite my roommate being this or that, i am absolutely sure that anyone could have certain complaints about anyone i am positive people could have their complaints about me! but the deeper i looked into the situation, the sooner i realized that everyone has their own idiosyncrasies. since, i have chosen to overlook the dissimilarities between my roommate and me, and, instead, strengthen our bond of interconnection by seeing the good in him. i can assure http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ you, he is a bright individual who constantly works as hard as he can, whenever he can. overall, this situation has helped me grow tremendously. so often do we work alongside people that have minor tendencies that overshadow their good naturedness from our perspective. it is just as matthew 7:5 says, “you hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.” due to my roommate situation, i have learned to not let those minor tendencies overshadow one’s goodness. finally, i am glad that i can honestly say that these first few months at notre dame have been by far the most transformative of my life. prior, i probably would have said the summers i caddied on the golf course made me who i am. now, i know that notre dame is forming me into the man i am to become. as blessed basil moreau would have agreed, “[students] should be trained in such a way that they may be everywhere what they were in school.” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week 12). from the days spent laughing with new friends to others spent “practicing my social skills” with kids who did not want to talk; from walking by the golden dome with mother mary standing atop, to asking for her intercession on my knees at the grotto; from the day when i was deferred, to the day i was accepted, it warms my heart to even think: i go to notre dame! though i cannot summarize my time in a single experience, the total experience of walking the sidewalks at our lady’s university has set my heart ablaze to “go and do likewise” as the good samaritan did (luke 10:37). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189414/download?download_frd=1 10/14/21 moreau integration the power of faith and love my root beliefs shape who i am. i stand by them, and they are my backbone when i make decisions in life. i believe that in order to forge lifelong and meaningful relationships, it is crucial to be vulnerable and be yourself. i think that we should search for ways to be more vulnerable and have the courage to stop being shameful of who we are. we need to accept any differences that we may have and love ourselves. if someone does not accept us for who we are, that person is not worth our time. for me, this is the only way that we can form deep, lifelong relationships and emotional connections with others. i believe in this because if we act differently in front of others in order to try to impress them, we can never get to that next stage in the relationship. acting differently will lead to an artificial relationship in which nobody in the relationship is being truthful and vulnerable to the other. i came to believe this with a lot of trial and error in my life. whenever i would act differently to make friends, i noticed that the friendship would never last long, and i would never get very close to the people. my parents have also told me to always be myself because that is how you form relationships in which the other genuinely appreciates and loves you. this belief is challenged frequently in that many times i may want to try to “fit in” by changing who i am as a person. however, recently i have stuck to this belief of staying true to yourself and it has made me much happier and allowed me to make some amazing friends who value me. we must truly think that we are worthy of being loved and belong (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brownmoreau fye week one). another root belief that is very important to me is that i believe that i grow as a person by having faith, being loving towards others, and being honest with myself. i think it is very important in life that we journey and strive to become our more authentic selves. i think one of the first steps we can take to become our more authentic selves is to love others. the reason for this is because loving others leads to a variety of things for yourself, including empathy and the ability to prioritize the needs of others over our own needs. this will allow us to become more genuine, open minded, and most importantly more authentic. faith is also very important in that a relationship with god can humble us in nature and allow us to turn towards redemption. when we have a strong relationship with god, we realize how we are nothing compared to him and that we should follow his word (the bible). i found what we learned in class very interesting, especially the video on our adam i and adam ii. a quote that i found very inspiring from that video was “"nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore, we must be saved by hope. nothing which is true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history; therefore, we must be saved by faith.” this quote reinforced my root belief and showed me the importance of turning away from the ambitious side of our nature and towards the more humbling side (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks-moreau fye week 2). i have come to believe this over time and through my strong backbone which is my family. my family has helped me with my faith and has shown me how loving others can help you grow as a person. i also believe that being honest with your self is very important. i believe that every once and a while, we should reflect on ourselves, where we are from, and our decisions. i enjoyed the “where i’m from” poem that we had to create because it gave me this opportunity to reflect on myself and who i am as a person. this assisted me in growing as my more authentic self (“where i’m from poem”-moreau fye week 6) (class discussion and peer sharing-moreau week 6). one root belief that is extremely important to me, is my belief that my purpose is to spread the word of god and help others grow in their faith. i believe that faith is extremely important in our life journey. without a belief in god, many of the obstacles that life brings to us will be difficult to face. for this reason, i think that god has given me the gift of faith so that i may spread it to others and show them the beauties of it. i think this root belief came from god. he gave my parents this gift and they in turn gave it to me. however, this belief is challenged very often. many times, i am tempted to ignore god and not stand up for him when my friends or others make fun of myself or others for having faith. however, this root belief has allowed me to overcome many of the challenges i have face, and help spread the word of god. i really enjoyed this week of moreau because i learned a lot from the texts, videos, and in class discussions. i especially enjoyed the video that talked about how faith brings light into a dark world. one quote that i found particularly interesting was: “faith sees god’s face peeking through every creature, like some divine game of peek-aboo between our heavenly father and ourselves. we don’t have to look elsewhere for god; we only need to look around. he’s there, and the dawning faith sees him everywhere.” i believe in the message of this quote because i think that we are not going to see or hear god if we do not truly believe in him. god is in everything we do, but we must look for him and have faith to see him (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grottomoreau fye week 3). avoiding toxic friendships and relationships are essential and i believe that good friendships can help us improve as a person and choose the correct path. i think many people underestimate the power of having friends that truly care about you and love you. i believe in this because the people you surround yourself with are extremely influential to who you become as a person (moreau week 4 class discussion). this belief originated especially because of my parents. my mother always used to tell me a quote, “tell me who you are hanging out with, and i will tell you who you are.” this belief is challenged often, especially here at notre dame. sometimes i am tempted to hang around individuals that are seen as “cool”, even if it will negatively affect who i become as a person. every time i am tempted by this, i remember this root belief and my mother’s quote. this belief has allowed me to form relationships that help me grow in a positive manner and make me happier. for class, we read an article about signs that you are in a toxic relationship and one of the quotes really stuck with me. the quote was “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term. think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend.” this quote showed me what to truly look for in a friendship which is one in which i am happy and feel good about myself after hanging out with them (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week 4). i believe that the members of our community should utilize faith and reason together, to grow close and become more united. i believe in this because religion binds us together and can help form strong communities. i have learned that having love and belief for the lord will allow us to be better neighbors. a community that shares similar values will also create a sense of unity and similarity in that community. for our qqc, we had to watch a video from fr. kevin grove, and i really enjoyed a specific statement in his speech. in the video he says, “faith and reason together, place us always in relationship to each other.” this hit me deeply and reminded me about the importance of faith and loving others (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.cmoreau fye week 5). once again, i came to believe this because of my parents. my parents have a very strong relationship with god. over my life they have taught me the importance of becoming close to god. i have also observed how their faith has strengthened their marriage and relationship with the fellow members of my community. i also believe that reason is important because we should not enforce our beliefs on anybody, and we should respect all the members of our communities’ beliefs. this belief has influenced my life a lot especially here at notre dame. going to my dorm mass on sunday is such a great feeling. i love watching everybody singing along and being very passionate in the mass. i have become very close with many of the people in my dorm because of this and other activities such as bible study. this example alone, proves how faith can strengthen a community (moreau fye week 5 class discussion). i believe that i pursue truth by being more conscious, educated, and taking action on world issues that deal with bias, discrimination, and lack of equality. by being more educated and taking action on these issues, we help pursue truth in the world. i think we all have to try to decrease our implicit bias and treat all people with a sense of equality. human beings must be more conscious in their decisions to help reduce bias in our world. by doing this we can make the world a better place. this belief influences my actions because i make sure to be extremely conscious of my decisions before making choices or taking action. i learned a lot from the article dealing with implicit bias. one statement that hit me deeply from the article is, “it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” this statement alone shows us that we could be bias even without knowing it. for this reason, we must educate ourselves more and be more conscious in our decision making process (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american-moreau fye week 7). integration 2 community and mental health: a journey some of the most important questions i’ve asked myself this semester were in regard to whether i was eating properly and if i would feel content with my life when looking back on it in the future. this often helped me make decisions to spend more time with friends and family rather than overly stressing about something i had no control over. this is a strategy that i will continue to use because i think it has helped improve my mental health to some extent, and i know that i will encounter more stressful situations during my life here at notre dame and beyond. as a result of my notre dame journey thus far, several things have grown and decreased in importance. i have come to realize that my mental health is more important in the long run than getting perfect grades. this also applies to my physical health because i have gotten sick at least four times during this semester and i don’t think that is good. self care has also increased in importance for me and i realized that this is different for many people. at the beginning of the semester, i saw everyone going to parties and hanging out in giant groups but i decided that has never really been for me. thus, i have yet to go tailgating or to a party. i prefer staying in my room and playing video games with online friends, and i think that is just as valid as going to a party if i get the same amount of enjoyment. i think this is something people struggle to accept, and i am glad that i figured it out fairly quickly. this also made me realize, however, that i need to interact more with the people around me. for this reason, i will make an effort to go tailgating and experience that at least once next year. something else that has increased in importance for me is food and nutrition. at several points in the semester, i was not eating enough or getting the nutrients necessary to get through the day. for example, i am currently still eating two meals a day instead of three. i realized that even if the food gets repetitive, i still need to do my best and eat when i am supposed to. it was actually kind of humorous because i ate so much when i went back home for thanksgiving break, simply because i missed the food. that aside, i had always thought that community was relatively straightforward. i thought it simply meant being part of a group of people doing the same thing. now, i realize that it is actually more complicated than this and that although, “the most common connotation of the word ‘community’ in our culture is ‘intimacy,’ this is a trap.” 1 this sort of supports my previous belief because you don’t always have to be close to everyone in a community. when i first arrived at lewis hall though, we were told that this was our new community and that everyone had to 1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/modules/items/103498 palmer, “13 ways..community” (week 11) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/modules/items/103498 take care of each other. this made me realize that not every community will hold the same amount of importance to you and that it is important to do your best for the communities that do matter the most to you. something i was sort of unclear about on the other hand, was imposter syndrome. i thought it wasn’t really applicable to so many people, but i found out that anyone can experience imposter syndrome at any point in their life. i found that this quote perfectly addresses the misconception i had about it: “to call it a syndrome is to downplay how universal it is. it’s not a disease or an abnormality, and it isn’t necessarily tied to depression, anxiety, or self esteem.” 2 i think this is important to keep in mind because you are not alone in new situations, and there will always be at least one person who feels the same way as you. furthermore, i have encountered a clearer definition of hatred as well as humankind that i plan on taking into consideration for my future decisions. after taking philosophy, i was able to comprehend these different texts that we read for moreau a lot more easily. specifically, i enjoyed reading the following about hatred: “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action. hatred poisons everything.yet we seem not to see the danger. as augustine wrote in his confessions,“it is strange that we should not realize that no enemy could be more dangerous to us than the hatred with which we hate him.” 3 i was able to apply this to many different encounters in my life and i have come to the conclusion that moving forward, i will try to minimize hatred and negative feelings toward others, regardless of how many rough situations i encounter (with family, etc). i think this will help me grow as a person and hopefully help me mend relationships back home. similarly, we have discussed humanity in my philosophy class, and i think this quote portrays how i now view humans and souls/spirits: “humans are amphibians half spirit and half animal.as spirits they belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time.” 4 therefore, moving forward, i want to make the most out of my experiences. as mentioned before, i will be indulging in the things that make me happy already, and i will also explore new things that have the potential to become my favorites as well. i know that throughout my time here at notre dame, i will encounter many more difficulties, but these are what i want to keep in mind in order to push through. 4 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186733/download?download_frd=1 lewis “screwtape letters” (week 12) 3 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ jenkins, “wesley..commencement” (week 10) 2 https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo cox, “what is imposter syndrome?” (week 9) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186733/download?download_frd=1 https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo integration 2 coming to community throughout my first semester at notre dame i have definitely learned a lot about myself as well as the people around me. i remember several times throughout the semester that i was really stressed or worried about certain situations. at the time, these things felt extremely important and scary, but it is interesting to think that these things really didn’t matter as much as i thought they would. i think that through what i have encountered so far, i have definitely learned a lot about myself, and as a result, i think i have grown a lot. through my time in moreau, especially these last few weeks, i have learned that connection is the most important thing and that while we all have our own experiences and challenges, the most powerful thing is how we can come together as a united community. week 9’s reading for this class was one of the most impactful for me. in the beginning of the semester i felt several of the things discussed in “advice from a formerly lonely college student”. i remember feeling really lonely at times and feeling like i was the only one feeling this way. at the start, it was really difficult for me to adjust to life in college while it looked like everyone else was doing so well. i remember talking to my older sister on the phone one night and telling her about my struggle with this and how i felt like i was the only one because everyone else seemed to be doing so great. i remember how she made me realize that from an outside perspective i probably would look the same, and like i am doing really well. i think one of our largest problems is that we are not always vulnerable and honest with each other. knowing that other people were struggling as much as me honestly helped a lot because i didn’t feel like i was going through it alone. it is easy to get trapped in your own thoughts and think that nothing will work out, but i’ve come to realize that you can overcome anything if you just give things a chance and time to work itself out (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergman, nyt moreau fye week 9). i also found the video on imposter syndrome to be really insightful. i know that i tend to doubt myself at times and whether or not i’m actually intelligent and talented or if i’ve just gotten lucky. again, it was helpful to learn that countless people have felt this same way including some of the most smart and talented people of all time. in class we discussed how many of us still get this feeling of the imposter syndrome regardless of our accomplishments and the fact that we go to such a good school. i found this to be really interesting because people tend to present the best side of themselves that they want society to see which often excludes these vulnerabilities (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox, ted-ed moreau fye week 9). because of this, i have come to the belief that people should be more vulnerable and open with each other like we talked about early on in this class. i think that sharing experiences and vulnerabilities is one of the best ways to help each other and grow. that is why i think that forming connections and being a part of an enriching community is one of the most important things. in week 10, this belief was further developed when we learned about challenges in our community and our role in responding to them. firstly, fr. jenkins’s commencement address discussed the importance of community. he talks about the necessity for everyone to have love in their lives. he makes the point that hatred is what “poisons” us. while this may seem obvious, hate often resides within all of us even when we don’t notice it. when we get too wrapped up in our own beliefs and opinions, it is easy to let our desire to have other people see the world the way that we do, turn into a judgment and hate of their beliefs that may not align with our own. instead of judging people based on their differences in beliefs, i think it is important to accept that other people may have different upbringings or situations that have led them to these beliefs. i think that we can always learn important lessons from people who think differently than we do. there is something to be appreciated about having such immense differences between us that we can learn so much from the people we surround ourselves with. i have learned some of the most important lessons from people who i fully disagree with. it can sometimes be hard and uncomfortable to do this, but i think that some of the most important ways for growth have come from interacting with people who have different experiences than i do. ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address"” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ fye week 10). furthermore, the kintsugi video from week 10, makes the point that it is important to care for the people in our community. i think we sometimes get wrapped up in our own problems and forget that everyone has conflict and struggles in life that could be very similar or different from our own. however, in the kintsugi video, they make the point that we are all capable of healing and that our life experiences, good and bad, are what make us the unique people we are now. i have found that even though i had a really difficult time adjusting to college in the beginning of the semester and felt really lonely and struggled at times, i have grown a lot as a result. i think that i have become a better person as a result of the difficult things i have gone through in life which i think is really important. ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grotto moreau fye week 10). the idea of community was even further developed in week 11. in the article by parker palmer, he makes the assertion that rather than trying to avoid pain and suffering we should instead embrace it as a means for growth. he claims that suffering as a way of “breaking your heart” actually allows you to become open enough to embrace some of the most important things like hope and resilience. i think this is definitely true. without suffering in life, we keep ourselves closed off from some of the most important experiences and things that life has to teach us. furthermore, he makes an important point about community. he talks about how being a part of a community is not like a “garden of eden” but a place “that can withstand hard times and conflict.” suffering is an unavoidable part of life, so rather than running from it, we should take it as a chance for learning and growth. however, i think we need a solid foundation to get through this, and we cannot do it alone. that is why i think that being a part of a community who cares about each other and can withstand the inevitable conflict that we will face is vital in our lives (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage & renewal moreau fye week 11). throughout my first semester, i have learned a lot about community, and i have come to the realization that being a part of a solid community and forming connections with people is the https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau most important thing to having a good life. as a result, i will try to further make connections with the people around me, and will try to form more relationships with people who have different beliefs and experiences than i do. panethiere 1 theo helm moreau first year experience 2 december 2021 seeing (and repping) green: managing imposter syndrome and academic insecurity in a new, irish environment while maintaining new relationships the first semester of college—and even the first year—is a major adjustment for just about every student. a new environment, whether it’s a new town, new friend group, new classes, or all three, rookie college students have a plethora of factors to acclimate themselves to. and not all these pieces will come easily. instances of insecurity in academics, social life, and even within the self surround the college experience. navigating through this past semester, through a completely foreign environment, i’ve learned a lot about how i operate in a college setting, how i need to change my outlook on education, and how i have to alter my mindset during this transition from high school. week nine of moreau dealt with perhaps the biggest obstacle i’ve had to overcome in my college experience thus far: imposter syndrome and academic insecurity. coming from high school, where i was used to doing well in class with minimal effort and often didn’t have many peers to academically push me, coming to college was a culture shock. i was surrounded by extremely smart people who were just as driven by their academic achievement—if not more—than me. not being at the top of the class, not getting all a’s, and taking a little longer to understand certain concepts really impacted my confidence this semester. i didn’t feel like i belonged at notre dame, that i didn’t deserve my spot—i’d reduced myself in high school to only my academic accomplishments, and now i wasn’t even achieving great academic scores. it took a lot of time and a lot of conversations with older students to realize that as long as i was learning and enjoying the material that i was learning, having perfect grades didn’t really matter. when i found my friend group and saw how supportive everyone was of me no matter what i did, i realized that my expectations that i was trying to reach to impress others were completely self-imposed. those who were judgmental of me or my achievement weren’t those that i should have been dedicating my time to—after all, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others” (“why letting go of expectations is a free habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). realizing my academic journey was mine and did not depend on anyone else was a really freeing moment, and now i am better able to analyze my academic success by how much i enjoy my major or how much i feel like i am learning. ending this semester, for the first time i’ve been less concerned with the grade aspect of my learning, and i’m more proud of each achievement and am trying to focus more on being happy at school instead of just doing well academically. managing interactions with others who may or may not share the same background prior to coming to notre dame has been an expected challenge, but the way our experiences change interactions with each other looked a little different from my expectations. admittedly, sometimes my biggest issue lies in ignorance: i just simply don’t know about the differences in some of my peers’ upbringings. one thing i have found to be extremely important as i get to know others is to not enter any interaction with preconceived notions about someone else’s life. as i’ve gotten to know so many new, interesting people, learning about them without judgement is the only way to understand these new unfamiliar perspectives. going through moreau class time has been a great way for me to learn about new people, their perspectives, and how these perspectives impact notre dame’s community. the notre dame community is all-encompassing in each undergrad’s life, an extension of the nation we live in. with so many people from all over the usa and the world, these different cultures must come together and unite in their similarities and respect their differences. father jenkins himself even says, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10), and this same ideal has been integral to my relationship building at notre dame—my inter-campus community must surround themselves in understanding and acceptance to stand together and make change. as i continue my undergraduate education, this mindset has set the proper foundation for the future relationships i hope to build. staying connected as a community within notre dame has also been an important highlight for the end of my first semester. while learning how to overcome differences within the community has been an initial goal, keeping my community strong and continuing to learn from my peers and notre dame family is a goal that builds off of my previous growth through moreau and my daily experiences. because notre dame is filled with so many people from different places with different stories, the opportunity these differences present to improving notre dame’s community is something i hope to contribute to by highlighting the voices of those that impact the campus community. this “capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11), and notre dame having these different backgrounds helps prepare me and my peers for a world that is a bigger example of the diverse cultures and lives found on campus. in class, learning about the ways campus life has both positively and negatively impacted my peers from different backgrounds has been really eye opening for me, and knowing how they are affected differently by certain situations has influenced me to better consider how others will be changed by certain words, actions, or biases. catholic education has made my capability for love and compassion a lot stronger within the last semester: by combining the ideals of love and acceptance of one another that catholic teaching emphasizes, the relationships between me and my peers is strengthened. doing good in this world for the fulfilment of future rewards (whether that’s heaven or just building positive relationships) is a foundation concept in notre dame’s approach to education—helping others only helps you in the long run. striving to be the best version of ourselves, by listening to the perspectives of others, can help us improve ourselves and benefit the entire community. going through our final weeks of moreau, this aspect of helping one another for the sake of just doing good was very prevalent in the way we approached our in-class discussions and relationships; our conversations were filled with support and understanding, and we all were very grateful for each person in the room that got to impact us in a new way. despite the fact that “none of us can be so perfect” in every aspect of our lives, “the aim for the christian [is] twofold: to reach one’s fullest potential in this world while remaining focused upon the ultimate goal of fullness in the life to come.” (“holy cross and christian education” by james b. king – moreau fye week 12). to maintain the goal of being the best person i can be for others, continuing to model myself after those that i admire with the hope to one day become my best self is perhaps my largest personality growth throughout my time in moreau. i want my peers to enjoy their time at notre dame as much as i want to enjoy mine, and i look forward to helping them achieve their goals. looking back at this semester, i have been so lucky to have grown in mind, body, and spirit through my time in moreau. using the advice i have received through readings and class to learn more about my peers without judgement and aim to help them in their endeavors has made my time at notre dame thus far all the more meaningful. as i move into next semester, i hope to continue the momentum of my previous learning and learn more about even more people in the notre dame community while learning more about myself, my values, and my education. encountering doubt, community, and fatih: my notre dame journey throughout my first semester at notre dame, i have found ample time to reflect on the people and experiences i have encountered and how these confrontations have impacted me. in this process of beginning a new chapter, i can see how overcoming personal challenges, immersing myself in a diverse community, and deepening my faith will continue to shape me as a person and student over the course of my college career. the things that i have already encountered in my short time as a notre dame student are actively shaping me into a better person, and i am confident that i will continue to grow as i encounter new horizons. in a place of such academic prestige, it is easy to feel small and insignificant at times. this was certainly the case for me the first few weeks after arriving on notre dame’s campus. in late august of this year, i transitioned from being the valedictorian of my high school in a close-knit town where my success was often praised, to being one individual in a sea of unfamiliar faces, all who appeared to be smarter and more qualified than me. it was a profound transition, one that put me on edge. elizabeth cox explained what imposter syndrome is in a video, stating that “...we each doubt ourselves privately, but believe we are alone in thinking that way, because no one else voices their doubt” (video: "what is imposter syndrome?" (elizabeth cox, ted-ed) moreau fye week 9). i found that this imposter phenomenon was exactly what i was experiencing. i felt like everyone around me had college figured out on day one, that i was alone in my struggles. it was an eye-opening, yet difficult experience to encounter this level of self-doubt that i had never experienced before. however, it was through open, honest conversations with my peers that i discovered i was not the only one feeling like this. in reality, we all felt like tiny fish in a big pond of geniuses. through this experience, i was reminded of something very important: i belong here. i am here for a reason. as i listened to my classmates discuss their feelings, it became evident that we all viewed each other as superior to ourselves, when in reality, we are all here because of our shared drive and capability. i realized that the gifts and talents of those around us do not have to take away from our own. instead of downplaying my successes, i should have confidence in the fact that i am here. college is going to be a big adjustment for me, i have already discovered. i have encountered self-doubt and have taken blows to my self-confidence, and i have faced new academic struggles that i did not encounter in high school. however, encountering this dissonance has led me to realize the importance of focusing on the journey and my personal growth, rather than small individual outcomes. “we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens” (text: "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" (julia hogan, grotto) moreau fye week 9). if i spend my time focusing on getting the perfect grade, or meeting every high expectation i have for myself, i will never be satisfied. encountering these issues early on in my college career has prepared me to have confidence, while allowing my education to transform me into a better person; to focus on learning simply for the sake of learning and growing. these actions, i believe, will play a pivotal role in my development over the next four years. outside of my internal awakenings, i have also encountered a great community at notre dame. i think that before arriving here, community was this sort of ambiguous concept in my mind that was difficult to define. now, i understand that a community isn’t just about where you are from. after a few months here, i would define community as a group of diverse individuals united by their values or passions who all contribute towards a common goal. although i believe i am a part of an amazing community at notre dame, this does not mean that there is always perfect harmony. i have already encountered instances where the community has fallen short of what it should be. for example, when the rover article which attacked the lgbtq community was published, or smaller moments like when i witnessed girls in my dorm making fun of a fellow resident behind her back; it was in these instances where i saw threats to our united community. even though these threats are rare, and i would certainly not define our community by them, it is vital that we recognize and correct them. if we want to come together completely, we need to reduce hate, and instead create and inspire love. as father john jenkins said in his 2012 commencement speech, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (text: "wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" (fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.) moreau fye week 10) through my initial encounters with brokenness at college, i have concluded that blind hatred, and a reluctance to accept others, is the biggest threat to our community. and as notre dame students, i think we all have a certain duty to combat this hatred. as one individual in a large population, it can seem hopeless at times that one person’s actions could eliminate hatred. however, as parker palmer states in an article, “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness” (text: “thirteen ways of looking at community” (parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal) moreau fye week 11). this quote emphasizes that community often starts with the individual. for any type of comradery to be achieved, individuals must be open-minded and willing to connect with others. the power of the individual to shape the community is greater than we know. when we choose kindness and exhibit this behavior daily, this goodness has a domino effect on those around us, so our actions are more impactful than they might seem. by encountering both brokenness and unity while being a part of notre dame’s community, i have learned the importance of being accepting, spreading love, and taking up the personal responsibility to make the community a better place. before college, i already had some pre-existing expectations that i would encounter academic challenges as well as a new community. however, i was not prepared to encounter faith the way that i have at notre dame. i have found that my connection with god has grown tremendously already. from going to mass every sunday with my dorm, to kneeling in thought at the grotto, i have found that my faith is a vessel of peace, comfort, and hope for me. i don’t think that i could have the type of relationship with god that i do now if i had gone to school anywhere else. notre dame’s mission is based upon this faith which makes it such a special place. as stated in “holy cross and christian education”, “christians spread hope, and religious like those in holy cross, have a special obligation to embolden others to pick up their crosses” (text: “hope holy cross and christian education”pages 14-16 (fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). coming here, i feel inspired; i feel that i have been called to fulfill a great duty in life as a notre dame student, to spread hope and love, and to spread the goodness of god to others. encountering this inspiration has made me feel like i am exactly where i am supposed to be. i think that my rejuvenated interest in my faith will play a key role in my development and growth. everyday i wake up grateful to be at this university. each day there are endless opportunities on the horizon: opportunities to grow individually, to be a part of a community, and to grow in one’s faith. i am always looking forward to what new experiences i might encounter that day. i am open and willing to embrace the lessons these encounters will yield as i embark on the rest of my college journey. integration 1 assignment bryan reaume integration 1 assignment 14 october 2021 do i belong here? growing up, i remember the feeling of the whole family gathering in the living room on a saturday to watch notre dame football. i remember listening to stories of how my parents met here, and their stories of the best time of their lives. when applying to college, i knew i wanted to attend notre dame, but i wasn’t sure if the school was right for me, or if i was simply following in the footsteps of my parents. upon arrival, the moment the morrissey guys came up to my car and greeted me with cheers, already knowing my name, was the moment that i knew that i was going to love this community. school went on and got harder, and i realized that my grades were slowly slipping. i was spending many hours in the library and yet the grades would not recover. because of this, i began to question whether i academically belonged here, and i am still pondering that question. however, the themes that i have pondered in the moreau class have given me more confidence in the fact that things will work out the way they are supposed to, and that i am exactly where i am supposed to be in life. i believe that i am searching for where i belong. to go about this, i first had to understand my true, authentic self, and this was done through an analysis of my most vulnerable self. in her video on vulnerability, brené brown comments about confident people: “they believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful”(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i think this statement holds true because in order to be confident, one must have self love. however, self love is no easy feat because it involves mailto:breaume@nd.edu https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 accepting all of one’s own drawbacks and insecurities. in my own life, academics have always been my strong suit. however, in college, i believe that it has become one of my insecurities. now, i acknowledge that grades do not make up who i am, and it is in this acceptance that i can truly accept myself and become confident. but the fact that i must tell myself that i am not a failure only corroborates the fact that there are certain values that society holds over others that are not entirely logical. david brooks touches on this point in his discussion of adam 1 and adam 2. brooks explains that “we happen to live in a society that favors adam one and often neglects adam two. and the problem is that turns you into a shrewd animal, who treats life as a game”(“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). adam one, in brooks’ explanation, is the part of one’s personality that wants to conquer, achieve, and is ambitious. adam two, on the other hand, is humble and strives to be good in the name of god. society favors adam one over adam two because adam one has tangible achievements, and despite the amount of good that adam two does, it may have nothing to show for it. in my life, i feel that my adam one is falling behind, and i can confirm that there is a loss of affirmation from society. i believe that i grow by developing my own framework that does not align with what society desires of me. instead, i want to grow a framework that aligns with who i want to be. in his personal reflection about faith, professor fagerburg creates a metaphor of spirituality as a light. he says that “the unexpected flashes of love in our lives illuminate reality, like a thunderbolt of lightning can illuminate the dark yard”(“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). my optimal framework for my life would revolve around this notion that love is what shows us the true meaning of life. i think that with my concerns about grades and school and my place in life, i forget what i want life to mean to me. i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=partner&utm_medium=promotion&utm_campaign=moreau want to experience love in the purest form-love of god, of family, of friends-over anything else. and in order to follow my framework, i need to be attentive to these brief flashes of lightning that remind me what is important in life. the one fallibility within fagerberg’s metaphor is that, indeed, people worth love are not quite as striking as lightning. so how do we know if that person is our lightning, and how do we become that lightning? olivia taylor, a writer for grotto attempts to tackle this difficult question. she offers that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people, but every so often, we find ourselves making an effort with a person we probably shouldn’t”(“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). i think the key part of taylor’s analysis is that a good friendship must be mutually beneficial. even if you gain something from the relationship, if the other person does not gain, then the relationship cannot be a loving one. i think i can fall into this trap occasionally, thinking that the relationship is beneficial, when the other person is actually not growing with me. these relationships must go both ways. i believe that my future will be shaped by both my present and my past. in my present, i am striving to learn how to find a better balance in my life at notre dame. i can strongly relate to father kevin grove’s reflection on notre dame education. he concludes about this place that it is not only a school, but here, “faith and reason, together, place us always in relationship to each other”(“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove, c.s.c moreau fye week five). upon my meeting with my rector in morrissey, i found myself talking about my struggles with this. i have always been a mass going person, but when i got to college, i felt that most sundays were filled with studying and homework, and i was pressed for time. this meant skipping many masses. i felt that reason, my education, was not in relationship to my https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ faith, and this was difficult for me. however, my rector reassured me that this was normal. people need time to adjust to college, and that i did not need to get down on myself. i think this really helped me understand that achieving what i want in my future-both at notre dame and in my life as a whole-takes time to achieve. i cannot simply snap into the mold of exactly what i want to have in my life. furthermore, much of my present and future have been shaped by my past. inspired by george ella lyon’s ‘where i’m from’ poem, i reflected deeply upon what made me who i am today. in lyon’s website, lyon reflected that, when constructing the ‘where i’m from’ poem, to “let your goal be the writing itself. learn to let it lead you”(“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). it was really nice to have an hour of personal reflection on the experiences that have made me, not searching for them, but letting my mind lead me to them. but in addition to just writing the poem i think that this advice was very influential to remember in life as well. sometimes, when i go searching for something, it slips out of my hands like water, but if i let life lead me where it wants, things seem to fall into place. i believe that i am responsible for shaping my own life through experiences. despite talking about letting life lead me to where i should be, it is important to me that i put myself in places that will give me diverse experiences. currently, a major problem in our society is that of prejudice. writers for scientific american report on this problem. they claim that “there is a mountain of evidence—independent of any single test—that implicit bias is real”(“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). implicit bias is real, and it is too prevalent in our society. however, no matter how much i may care about equality, i am susceptible to implicit bias, too. therefore, i feel that i, along with society, have the utmost responsibility to give ourselves experiences of diversity in order to combat this implicit bias. this is one way that i feel i need to grow at notre dame, and i am https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ looking forward to becoming the best version of myself through lessons i have learned in life. and with this mindset, i feel that i truly do belong here at notre dame. integration 2 moreau fye professor retartha 3 december 2021 integration two as i sit on the south shore train, on my way to chicago for thanksgiving with my family from south bend, i have had time to reflect and realize that my first semester at college has gifted me with opportunity, perspective, new relationships, as well as the ability to discover a new sense of self. while the journey from salt lake city, utah was anything but easy in the beginning, learning to be independent in south bend has enabled me to uncover many different facets of my personality that i never knew existed. i feel more confident in the person that i am, and i am learning to love all the many different parts of myself, both good and bad. going into my senior year of high school, i was unsure of what i wanted in life, as well as the person i wanted to be. i did not forge genuine relationships with others because i did not love myself enough to love others as much as i should have. because of this, i found myself missing out on opportunities and people due to fear of standing out or not fitting in within the high school bubble. in order to cope with this, i started running. running was my outlet, a passion that enabled me to feel free and untouchable. whenever i ran, my mind was at peace with who i was, and i was gifted with a sense of clarity that i was unable to see in my everyday life. after this discovery, i used this passion to help me through my senior year of high school. i joined the cross country team, made connections with people that will always hold a special place in my heart, and i was able to do what i loved every single day of the week. i finally felt like i was learning about who i was, as well as who i wanted to be, until the time for college decisions began to appear. i am not going to lie, until october of 2020 i had never thought about going to school at notre dame. my mom is from chicago, so i always thought about going to school in the city and decided that i wanted to tour the many different chicago schools. after looking at loyola chicago, northwestern, and depaul i was upset because i did not get the “feeling” that i had always imagined in my mind. when i stepped foot on campus, i didn’t feel like i belonged and i worried that my attention was focused in the wrong direction. that was when my mom decided to introduce the idea of taking the train down to south bend to visit notre dame. on the way there she looked at me and said, “nettie, i feel like this is your place.” when we arrived in south bend, i stepped foot onto campus, looked straight in my mom’s eyes and said, “this is where i need to be.” notre dame became my dream school, and the place that i pictured my future. i knew that this was the place i needed to be even though it didn’t originally belong in my plans. because of this, i decided to apply early action in the hopes of getting in early and sealing the deal. after getting deferred in december, i was crushed to think that i wasn’t going to end up at the place that felt the most home, but i wasn’t going to give up that easily. i wrote my letter of interest hoping that i would get into notre dame regular decision, and i felt confident knowing that god had a plan for me. on decision day, i opened my computer, refreshed my portal, and was devastated when i didn’t see the “congratulations on getting into notre dame” message pop up on my screen. i shut my computer and tears began to flow down my cheeks like a raging waterfall. my mom was with me and her words still echo in my mind, “wait nettie you didn’t get denied.” that was when i decided to begin my gateway journey. after reading the week 9 material titled, “encountering dissonance,” i easily related to elizabeth cox and her explanation of imposter syndrome. going into notre dame as a gateway student has not been the easiest. oftentimes, i find myself feeling like i don’t belong, falling victim to the imposter syndrome that cox describes in her ted talk. she explained that impostorism prevented people from sharing their ideas with others due to feeling less than the people around them. when reflecting on my first semester at college, i have realized that i am not the only person who feels this way, and i should not let my feelings get in the way of expressing who i am as well as my beliefs and opinions. moving into week 10, reading the article about teaching critical race theory in catholic schools, i realized how lucky i am to be able to attend a catholic university. through my unique and lucky opportunity to practice catholic social teaching, i am provided with a powerful resource that enables me to move forward changing the narrative and aligning with the theological principles that direct me on the best direction and path towards unity with god. it is crucial that we are willing to have those hard conversations as a school, as well as a society, in order to slowly change the world for the better and open the minds of others to appreciate and respect all people. the material in week 11 enabled me to realize the importance of community. the reading stated that “when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” oftentimes, it is easy to forget how lucky we are to go to a catholic school, where our peers as well as our professors have our best interests at heart. because of this, we often go about our everyday lives nonchalantly trying to meet people, so that we can get invited to a certain party, or just have someone to know in a class. while getting to know people this way is not always a bad thing, most likely, the relationships will not be as genuine and meaningful due to the fact that they have been derived or forced on the basis of needing something from another. if we can go about our everyday lives focused on maintaining and establishing mutual relationships that make both parties better, then one can create a genuine and lasting connection that will further their community and last a lifetime. last, but certainly not least, the material in week 12, c.s. lewis’s screwtape letters enabled me to take a step back and think about the choices i am making as i journey throughout my college experience. oftentimes, “the enemy” that lewis so often talks about can make it easy to be lured into doing something at a party, giving into the temptation, and then feeling abandoned and guilty later. this is a vicious cycle that continues so long as i do not take a step back and truly view my morals and think about how my actions have consequences. if i can work to resist temptation, growing in both faith and hope, then i will live a life centered around god and the just life that he has planned out for me. going into my second semester, i need to be grateful for where i am at, remember that i belong, and make decisions that will benefit me in the long run, ultimately leading me closer and closer on the path towards unity with god. integration 1 word count: 1335 finding my authentic self: root beliefs week 8 integration one i believe that kindness is always beautiful. i am a huge people-person. i love being around people, getting to know people, and making people feel joy. the happiest moments in my life include being with people i love or helping others. while i have always known i was an extrovert, the via survey of character strengths (https://www.viacharacter.org/character-strengths-via moreau fye week two) showed me how kindness can be and is one of my strengths. after taking the survey, my top strengths include kindness, gratitude, teamwork, and appreciation of beauty and excellence. not only did i learn my strengths, but i also learned about some of my weaknesses including humility, love, and bravery. this helped me to gain a greater understanding and appreciation of my true self. this also helped me to better understand what david brooks said in his youtube video that the humble side of our nature is built by fighting our weaknesses using our strengths (“david brooks: should you live for your resume...or your eulogy” (https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim) moreau fye week two). i now know that being kind is not only a large part of my strength and personality, but also can help me to grow my weaknesses to live a more beautiful, purposeful life. i hope to use the knowledge of my strengths to identify and appreciate myself more as well as to aid in my continuous journey of self-growth. i believe that everything happens for a reason. this idea has changed my perspective entirely. this statement is something that has helped me face challenges as it has shown me that there is purpose in everything, even the hardest of times. i often connect this root belief of purpose to my faith. in the article “faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg, he explains that “faith, hope, and love adjust the lighting of our life so that we look beyond ourselves to see god” (https://grottonetwork.com/keep-thefaith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-darkworld/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau moreau fye week three). fagerberg explains that faith, hope, and love allow us to look at god and the world differently. having faith allows me to identify that there is purpose in everything through god. trusting in the purpose of god has helped me to experience life with a greater sense of selfpurpose and gratitude. trusting in my own purpose through god helps me to consider good and bad experiences in a more positive light. being able to have a more positive mindset has helped me to enjoy life so much more. this is similar to the message of carla ann harris in her laetare medalist address as she stated, “view every setback and disappointment as a lesson. a lesson that may be one of the most important things that you learn for that season in your life” https://www.viacharacter.org/character-strengths-via https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau (https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 moreau fye week five). when i first arrived at notre dame, everyone was open about the fact that there will be challenges, but they also emphasized the amount of support that exists here and that everything works out in the end. it is easy to get caught up in negativity or comparison. however, i hope to continue to use this perspective to help me to not only find and enjoy all the opportunities that my time at notre dame offers, but to also help others in positively changing their perspective. i believe that communication is key to healthy, successful relationships. throughout the many relationships i have had, communication is an important factor in each of them. communication allows both parties to better understand each other and to be able to work through the relationship especially during tough times. this understanding has a lot to do with the fact that communication allows people to be more vulnerable. brené brown stated in her ted talk that wholehearted people form deeper connections because they can be vulnerable with those around them (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown (https://youtu.be/l0ifum1dykg) moreau fye week one). often the reason my own relationships or the relationships of those around me fail is due to a lack of communication that impacts the connection within the relationship. olivia t. taylor explains in her article “5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ moreau fye week four). communication is vital in letting both people grow within themselves and within the relationship while also being able to find joy in each other. however, communication is easier said than done. i often give people the advice of honesty and openness, but i do not always follow it myself. i have a fear of failure that is reflected in my relationships. i sometimes fear that telling the truth or responding to people the wrong way will lead to a failure in the relationship or a loss of the relationship entirely. to avoid this fear, i often do not respond or take a long time in doing so. in the future, i hope to grow in my own communication skills as it will improve my relationships and reduce stress. i believe that hard work always pays off. i believe myself to be a hard-working person. i always love to be doing something and i feel the most productive when i am actively working or involved in something. my work ethic is a large reflection of the experiences and environments that i grew up in. in the “where i’m from” poem from week 6, i discussed the traits that i gained from many parts of my life including family and sports. my parents are two of the most hard-working people i know. my dad is always out working with the goal of helping our family. while he is heavily involved in his own work, he is also heavily involved and on top of all of my family's finances and activities. my mom is a workaholic. she never stops working whether it is in her office or around the house. my work ethic is inspired by my parents and was fostered in the activities that i participated in, especially when i did gymnastics. i did gymnastics for 10 years starting at the age of 4. gymnastics was an unforgiving sport that taught me how to fall but also how to get back up. it https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 https://youtu.be/l0ifum1dykg https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ requires a ton of hard work with the constant goal of perfection. both my family and my sports (especially gymnastics) have caused me to value hard work and to strive for perfection in all that i do. through hard work, i have found success in the form of relationships, awards, or being able to learn a lesson from the experience. however, i sometimes struggle to find a balance and put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect. this pressure causes me to often want to control things around me. i hope to work towards finding a healthy balance in my life regarding work and appreciating the beauty in imperfection. i believe that all people should be accepted and loved. everyone is a human being that should receive basic rights and respect. i believe that everyone was put on this earth for their own unique purpose. i go through life with the mentality that everyone has something going on even if they do not look like they are on the outside, so everyone should be treated with kindness and respect. however, everyone is implicitly biased. implicit bias “sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair.” these biases are formed by our brain functions that cause humans to identify patterns and form generalizations (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris (https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/howto-think-about-implicit-bias/) moreau fye week 7). this article has made me realize that even though i think of myself as aware and accepting of others, i have implicit biases. i hope to use this awareness to identify and eliminate implicit biases i have in the future. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ encountering more of me i’ve been thinking about the concept of time and how we cannot find a home in time in the same way we can find a home in space. in other words, home is a space we can inhabit and are free to return to but also leave whenever we want. with time however, you cannot go back in time nor can you go forward, you must stay within the present and only reminisce or reflect on time that has passed or time that has yet to come. having this idea of time in mind, when i look back at the past 3 months, it feels like a blur. so much has happened in so little time, and i have encountered so much. i’ve encountered so many new ideas, new experiences, new people, formed new habits, new beliefs, and in some ways, a new outlook on life. in fact, this newly developed understanding of time came from the content that i’ve been learning from my god and the good life class. i wasn’t able to take philosophy classes in high school, so coming here i was nervous about taking it. i don’t really consider myself a philosophical person, but i was ready to learn new things. needless to say, it has been extremely rewarding. compared to the general classes i have to take for my major, i genuinely believe that taking this philosophy class has helped me encounter beliefs that make me question my own. i’ve been able to witness the university’s goal of “cultivating the heart [so that] we develop in virtue...for the sake of our most deeply held beliefs and hew to a higher standard of justice’’ (“hope-holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12) every monday night, we get to go to dialogue groups for ggl and discuss controversial questions. our dialogue leaders make sure that we pick a side and use what we learn to defend it. i remember at the beginning of the year we had goal setting meetings with our dialogue leaders and one of the goals i set for myself was to be able to take a stance and defend it. the quote above connects with this goal i had set for myself because i can defend what my heart truly believes with the philosophical ideals that i have learned in class—something that i could never have imagined being able to do before coming here. looking towards the future, i cannot wait until i can take more classes that are interdisciplinary and can be applied to all facets of my life. another thing that i have encountered about myself is how much i treasure social connections and making friends. every week, a group of us walsh girls go to lunch together and just detox from the fast-paced environment of school. it’s really the one time a week where we allow ourselves to really enjoy lunch and not rush it. sometimes we sit there for over an hour talking, even if we’ve finished eating. all the girls that i get to spend a majority of my time with are people who make my life richer, and people that i never expected to meet. in week 9 of moreau, we read an article that summed up how i felt about all the people that i have met here at notre dame “one of the great things about going away to college is the chance to meet people who are not the same. i learned to cherish each relationship for its uniqueness, for the different perspectives and ideas it brought into my life” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmannmoreau fye week 9). no one that i’ve met here and connected with is like anyone i’ve met before. i came into college feeling like i had to find someone who was like the people i knew at home as a replacement and also for comfort, but what i’ve realized is that you cannot set these unrealistic and unfair expectations on someone just to supplement your own needs. on my notre dame journey so far, i’ve found the importance of keeping myself grounded through the new friends i make here, especially since they bring a lot of comfort when i’m so far from home. however, i also have to remind myself to keep in touch with everyone back home, since those are still relationships that are important to me. i think that i’ve done a good job so far at this, and interacting with people comes easily. as i continue to meet more people, i hope that i can also find the space to have harder conversations about uncomfortable topics and ideas. in my moreau class, we talked about worries that we had expressed at the beginning of the year and where we were with them now. one of the common themes that came up was how surprised we were at the amount of support that was available around us if only we just asked. there was support from our communities, but also many university resources widely accessible. knowing the amount of support i have, it reminds me of what we read in one of the moreau readings: “i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration. the self-sufficiency i feel in success is a mirage. i need community—and, if i open my heart, i have it.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmermoreau fye week 11) i fully agree with this, i would not make any progress at notre dame or really in life if it weren’t for other people. right off the top of my head i can think of at least five people that have directly contributed to my happiness and success. my mom, who i call everyday so that i can share my success and also my concerns with. my walsh friends who i laugh with to ease the stress of studying for exams. my ras who have quickly become some of the people i trust the most. i have so much support immediately available. beyond that though, i have some other forms of support that i’ve found on campus. my building bridges mentor kristi lax-walker always shares good advice and connects me with professors who will help me with the future of my career. geddes hall, which gives me that little caffeine boost in father bob’s kitchen when i’m a little tired after my morning classes. it’s knowing that i have these people and places to lean on that get me through. i hope that as time goes on, i never forget the collaboration it took to get me to where i am and where i will be. despite all the positive relationships i’ve cultivated here, i’ve come to realize that many relationships are complex as well. i hold so much love for some people but sometimes that love can hold so much anxiety. at the core of it, “each human being has a deep spiritual, psychological, emotional longing for love,” and i always have to remember that people crave love just as much as i do (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.moreau fye week 10). what i would like to think of as black and white is unfortunately not as simple as i want it to be. whenever someone does something that bothers me, i always have to remind myself that sometimes people just want to be noticed, and that they always have a reason for the things that they do. i hope that i can work to be a more empathetic and patient person, and recognize that there is always more to the story. she believed she could so she did i believe that i am made in the image of god and called to live a life rooted in faith. this idea comes from my catholic faith and from god’s teaching that every human has inherent dignity and worth. we are all made in the image of god and with that knowledge, we are called to treat everyone around us with respect and compassion. as father pete mccormick acknowledges, “faith is a transformed mind, a mind filled with the light of god,” and is a something that is immensely fulfilling and empowering (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). throughout my life i turn to my faith for guidance and perspective whenever i am feeling lost or uncertain, and i find that although it might not give me perfect answers, it gives me a sense of comfort and hope. my faith not only allows me to grow closer to god, but also to those around me. whether it is through attending dorm mass or by participating in campus ministry, i have found fulfillment and community through my faith. by recognizing that i am made in the image of god, along with everyone around me, i gain a deeper sense of unity and connection. my faith has instilled a sense of appreciation for those around me and has allowed me to gain deeper insight into each person’s unique identity. i have even greater admiration for the myriad of diverse identities that make up god’s creation. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being my authentic self. as brene brown poignantly states, “the one thing that keeps us out of connection is our fear that we’re not worthy of connection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). by being my authentic self and recognizing my unique abilities and strengths, i can form deeper and more meaningful connections. i have come to this conclusion through my past relationships, and i have found that by being unapologetically confident in my identity and being https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 true to myself has yielded the closest and most rewarding relationships. however, being authentic requires vulnerability and this has been challenging in the past. vulnerability requires confidence and courage. it requires someone to be a peace with their abilities and recognize their self-worth. however, i know that i am not alone in this struggle. when discussing the idea of being vulnerable in moreau class, i realized that most of my peers also find it difficult to be open and are working on being their authentic self. i really enjoyed taking the character strength survey, and it helped me gain a better understanding of how i can forge deeper relationships through my strengths. for instance, i can use my strength of wisdom to guide others and connect. i also believe that using my strengths and living authentically aids in the “perpetual selfconfrontation between external success and internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). oftentimes in life it can be difficult to prioritize internal value and strong relationships in a society that is fast paced, competitive, and power hungry. however, i have already found at notre dame that developing my inner strengths and using those to deepen my faith, connect with others, and demonstrate compassion has been highly rewarding and validating. i believe that i pursue truth by deepening my education. i believe that education is key to finding truth, growing spiritually, deepening relationships, and gaining wisdom. not only has education allowed me to understand life around me, but it has also instilled in me a mentality of wonder and awe of the surrounding world. deepening my education allows my curiosity to blossom and learning about the surrounding world creates a sense of appreciation for god’s creation. “an education is a work of the resurrection… it leads us out of darkness of ignorance and sin,” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. – moreau fye week five) and through our studies we develop lifelong skills that allow us to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 serve each other in love. despite, our different interests, education brings us together and reveals to us different perspectives and ways of living. through my notre dame education, i strive to gain greater cultural relativism and awareness of the world around me. whether it is by attending guest lecturers, participating in a discussion, or even through a chemistry lab, deepening my education reveals truth about the world around me and empowers me to live out my life with a deeper purpose. i believe that i am responsible for being an active bystander and treating everyone in my life with the compassion they deserve. i believe that everyone deserves to be treated with love and care, and sadly this is sometimes not the case on college campuses. seeing statistics of assault and abusive relationships is extremely concerning and has further motivated me to be proactive about my role as a bystander. it is my responsibility to step in and protect those around me since “assault can happen to anyone, anywhere, by anyone and it’s on us to be our brothers and sister’s keeper” (“it's on us nd: the three d's of being an active bystander” by notre dame moreau fye week four). although it is not always easy to step in and take action, if we all cumulatively adopt the mindset of being an active bystander it becomes a lot easier to not only stop violence and injustice on campus but also to prevent it in the future. i strongly value treating everyone with kindness and respect whether this is by actively intervening or by merely doing random acts of kindness each day, such as asking someone to get lunch. you never know what someone else is going through and even the slightest kind act can make a huge impact. i also aim to be a resource for anyone feeling trapped in an unhealthy relationship and to be someone who can listen and care unconditionally. i believe that my community has shaped who i am. the people around me, throughout my life, impact the person i am today. the “where i’m from” poem (“where i’m from” by https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view moreau fye week six) has helped me identify how the people, places, and experiences in my life have shaped my beliefs and identity. i really enjoyed seeing how my hometown of houston and its diversity helped expand my perspectives and how my family and friends instilled important values of perseverance and determination in me. it is beneficial to evaluate the formative experiences in my life and reflect on how they shaped me into the unique person i am. i know here at notre dame, there will be many experiences that will shape who i am, and i am excited to take advantage of the many opportunities for growth. i am excited to grow closer with others who come from different backgrounds and who have been shaped by different experiences and learn more from them. i believe that i am called to promote justice in my community. social justice is something i feel very passionate about, and i feel that it is my responsibility to promote equality and unity in every aspect of my life. as adichie acknowledges in her ted talk “there is never a single story,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). i strive to remember this sentiment and open myself up to learning about the beauty in the diversity of the world and learning from different perspectives. throughout my notre dame education, my goal is to be vulnerable and open to being challenged or to admitting lack of awareness on certain ideas. i also aim to acknowledge my implicit biases and grow from this knowledge. we are all different in our unique ways, but these differences should bring us closer together rather than dividing us. even in talking to fellow peers in moreau, i was able to learn so much about different ways of life from their experiences. everyone has a different story and different identities. however, on the outside it is not always visible. talking with people from various identities allows me to educate myself so that i can pass this awareness on to others and hopefully reduce discrimination and injustice. the systemic injustice in america is a huge https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story problem, and if i can do my part towards a promoting a culture of inclusion and equity, then it is a step in the right direction. although it is impossible to synthesize all of my beliefs, ideas, and experiences in a singular paper, these core beliefs encapsulate some of my strongest feelings about my identity, how i view life around me, and my goals in making the world a better place. “the place we go from” as i entered my college career here at notre dame i came in with my own set of beliefs and ideals and perspectives on the world. however, i can safely say that even just after a semester my eyes have been opened to so many perspectives, and so many issues in our community. the community not just in the greater world but even at my own town, or even slight ones at notre dame. after all, nowhere is perfect, but what makes notre dame stand out among all else is the constant dedication to change for the better. over the course of this semester, i was able to ask myself many questions and been introduced to new ideas and people. i’ve come up with a couple of questions to seek truth for and one is how can i inspire and work for change regarding racism and discrimination and where should i start? or what constitutes a fulfilling life? or in what ways is community built up? and finally: in a world with suffering and pain and sorrow all around us how can we keep faith in god and his infinite love for creation? these questions among others have been responsible for making some issues more nuanced for me or more clear or even more important. one of the first questions i investigated this semester was how i could inspire work for change regarding racism. this question carries a lot of weight but if there is one fact, i’ve learned at notre dame (don’t worry professor taylor i’ve learned several) is that we take the questions that weigh heavily head on. a notre dame student is not afraid to get to the heart of a matter and to take on the weight of the world. we go here to serve after all. however, i think that this question can be boiled down to love. now in no way is this subject or matter able to be reduced to a four-letter word but this base emotion, lies at the heart of every human. jesus calls each of us to love our neighbor and he doesn’t discern between race, sexuality, gender, or creed. the solution of love paired with more practical matters such as policy and protection is the clarity needed to this solution. we need to change the hate in people’s hearts to begin to eliminate the racism plaguing this nation. the only way to inspire work for this change is to be the change. father jenkins said it best in his wesley theological seminary commencement address when he said, “the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today — the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love” (https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminarycommencement/ by father jenkins – moreau fye week 10). we are all called to love especially notre dame students as they go out from this great institution into the world. by acting out this love to all, as jesus did, we can be the change needed in this world especially for racism and discrimination. it will not occur overnight, but the world could not hurt with a little more love. another question i sought to answer was what constitutes a fulfilling life. this is a question that i fear may have just become more nuanced and complicated in my search for truth. however, this answer is of the utmost importance to me. if i can not live a fulfilling life than how can i be satisfied when i pass on. despite not having all the answers i can begin to tackle this question using what notre dame has taught me, as well as my life. in the summers i work for a rental company where i load and unload big trucks as i drive and deliver across the chicagoland area. we set up tents, tables, chairs, and even bounce houses. in my time working here, i’ve often gone to the west and souths sides of chicago which are very impoverished. i have my fair share of crazy stories and sometimes even scary ones but what i’ve drawn from this experience is deeper. the poverty, the struggle that i was faced with everyday hit me in my soul. a fulfilling life is not one where you are merely successful and draw up in yourself away from all others. a fulfilling life is getting up when you are knocked down and using any bit of power or wealth to bring up others with you. however, we can not shape ourselves to other’s visions. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ the grotto article from week 9 articulates this, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-ofexpectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). by stepping outside other’s visions of us, and beginning to embrace a life of service then we can go to bed everyday knowing we helped another human being, and in so doing bring a smile to our own faces. this much has been made clear to me by my notre dame journey so far. as the world erupts all around us in conflict and strife it is safe to question how we can build up our communities, as well as keeping faith in god during seemingly doomed times. both questions i sought to answer in my first semester at notre dame but again i fear i don’t have all the answers. as i go out from notre dame, i know i will have a much better grasp of the issues and questions that incite my imagination. here at notre dame community is evident everywhere you turn. whether it is getting an enthusiastic hello from father pete on his bike, or becoming very close with your hall members, or having gone to the grotto, community is everywhere. community is key to notre dame and the culture we promote here. to build good community we look no further than love again. community everywhere is susceptible to attacks of hatred like racism. yet as professor agustin fuentes states, “race and racism are malleable” (https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44eabd39-53c67ee1d436 by professor agustin fuentes – moreau fye week 11). with love at our base and in our hearts, just like at notre dame we can begin to build up a community of inclusion and diversity. furthermore, in the world where media brings all sorts of distressing and depressing news right to the tips of our fingers it is hard to keep hope and faith. anyone’s faith in https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 god could be shaken and i don’t think i’m the only catholic who might have felt this way. especially in a time where science advances so rapidly with little regard for ethics in some cases. father james b. king assures us that god, “would be just as insistent that christians place themselves in the midst of the debate about how to use the things we produce not only for material or personal gain but ethically and spiritually, for the advancement of all people” (https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189390/download?download_frd=1 by father james b. king – moreau fye week 12). we are called to keep faith in god, and yet work hard to make sure that everyone else keeps faith too and doesn’t go too far. in no way is the task easy, but good always prevails. my time here at notre dame has taught me many key lessons and given me clarity on my perspectives and the issues in this world. it is not always easy to look in the mirror and know i was blind to things, but i am able to do it today with a smile. a smile because i know that with my new vision i can go out and make change. after all, notre dame is not the place you come to but the place you go from. my class and i will go out into the world serving and helping others at every turn. i know this with a certainty. a guarantee of notre dame. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189390/download?download_frd=1 what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? moreau integration 1 mlm moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 maria luisa montenegro a brazilian girl learning to grow under the dome root belief #1: i believe that i am more than my grades. i grew up dependent on academic validation. my earliest memories of school consisted of coming home with a smile on my face to show to my parents how i got the highest grade of the class on that math test in the second grade. as the years went by and the subjects got harder, that “necessary” academic validation became gradually more painful to achieve. i needed my outstanding grades to get into college, to be hired for that selective internship, but what i realized later, is that the main reason why i wanted those grades was to fulfill a void within myself. the endless search for as brought to my life one huge a that i couldn’t fight on my own anxiety. at one point, my academics were all that mattered. i was a wreck, and i knew i needed to change. that’s when i encountered the value in my adam 2, the side of me that works to live, but doesn’t live to work. the side of me that appreciates the beautiful and small things in life. the side of me that is bigger and more complex than my resume. (should you live for your résumé… or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) just like brooks stated, i feel like in our society, we are raised to be all adam 1. living to work and sometimes forgetting the true meaning of life. i usually ask myself: “why am i doing what i’m doing?” the true objective is happiness, but how can we find happiness without appreciating the little things in life? at the end of the day my main goal is to make my adam 2 self shine more, but that’s not easy. yet, it’s nice to know that this isn't just me. as i discussed with my moreau friends, coming to notre dame resprests great academic achievement, but the classes are way harder than in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim high school, and the first grades were way lower. it was a shock, truly. however, grades are not the only reason why we are here. as fr. kevin said in his speech for our week 5 qqc: “our lives are not our resumes. it’s just being who we are as holy cross, letting faith and reason both in their fullness be able to apply in every part of our lives” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) we are notre dame students because we are a source of good in the world, and we are bigger and better than random alphabet letters in our report cards. root belief #2: i believe that vulnerability is a strength. “be strong!” that's something so common to hear, but what does it truly mean? when i was little, i thought strength was the ability to gracefully deal with your problems by yourself, but then i realized that this would be a sad and utopic reality. i have to say, i learned this in the hard way. i always had this habit of saying: “let me fix that” or “i will deal with this on my own, don’t worry,” but what i didn’t realize was that by dealing with hardships alone, the inability to share my feelings, made me suffer one hundred times more. so i had the “brilliant” idea of simply ignoring my sad feelings. i would ignore my anxiety, ignore my pain, ignore my loneliness, and then i realized i was ignoring the joy, the happiness, and the beauty of life. just like dr. brown says: “you can't numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects, or emotions. you cannot selectively numb. so when you numb those, we numb joy; we numb gratitude; we numb happiness.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) throughout my college application process last year, the stress was so overwhelming that i ended up shutting down my feelings. at the time it was something completely involuntary, but now that i look back, i can clearly see the moment where i simply “stopped feeling.” i did not care about my appearance, my mental health, my friends, my social life or anything at all. now, i’m in the process of taking my feelings out of anesthesia and finding the value in my vulnerability. the main way i’m able to do this is through my healthy relationships with my new https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be notre dame friends. i learned that it is okay to ask for help, and your true friend will come with an open heart and open arms to be by your side. thankfully, i grew up in a very loving household, and always knew what a healthy relationship consisted of, but unfortunately, i engaged myself in friendships where i couldn’t fully be my vulnerable self. as i saw in week 4, the text from the “red flag campaign” states that: “people in healthy relationships respect each other. they can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions. they trust and support each other and respect each other’s independence. in contrast, an unhealthy relationship is unbalanced. one partner (a person in the relationship) tries to control the other.” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by red flag campaign moreau fye week four) throughout my 19 years of life, i have already encountered friends that constantly wanted to put me down and sustained a unilateral relationship. i was lucky enough to catch the red flags early, but if i stayed in this friendship for longer, my mental health could’ve been severely harmed. now, i understand the unique balance between commitment with yourself, the others around you, and your feelings. our ability to be vulnerable and communicate our suffering and weaknesses is our greatest asset towards growth. root belief #3: i believe my culture is my greatest quality. “oh, you are from brazil! i bet you like soccer!” although that might seem like a harmless statement, being a latin american girl inserted in an international environment, i have faced a lot of stereotypes. some of them are just funny, but there is one point that it just becomes offensive. people forget to ask the extra question and just assume that the place you are from fully represents your character. don’t get me wrong, it’s normal to have stereotypes pop in your mind once in a while. as keith payne writes , it doesn’t make you racist, sexist, or whatever-ist. the problem is when you observe a prejudgment pattern in your mind and don’t do anything to correct that. (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne moreau fye week seven) since i got here to notre dame, i remember very vividly, on domerfest, a few girls asked me if https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ my house was located in the forest and if we had contact with wild animals. brazil’s biodiversity is beautiful, indeed, but people need to step out of the way the media portrays developing nations, and create their own opinions. brazil is not the poor, sad, and hungry country that some believe it to be. instead, it is one of the most economically powerful countries in the world, with endless amounts of smart and ethical leaders. therefore, in week 6 of moreau, inspired by george ella lyon and her idea of where i’m from lists, i took a moment to appreciate my origins (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). i closed my eyes and visualized the beautiful beach in front of my building, the warm hug of my mom and the delicious food we eat on sunday lunches. this activity was super interesting, because it made me realize that my surroundings transformed me into the human being i am today, and i’m proud to say i come from the northeast of brazil. my culture makes my perspectives rich and diverse, and i love to share my knowledge with others. in fact, while we were sharing our poems in the moreau class, i loved to explain a little bit of what brazil is like to my friends and colleagues. they were certainly impressed about the multiple realities they could encounter in a big country like that. root belief #4: i believe that faith makes my journey brighter. last, but not least, my main core belief, and the reason that i’m here: my faith in god. for week 3 we had the pleasure of hearing from fr. pete, where he compared our relationship with faith to shoe knots: “our relationship with faith has to be just like we deal with the knots in real life. be patient. it’s always more complicated to figure it out when you are in a rush” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete moreau fye week three). my idea of faith changed a lot during the years. coming here to notre dame, i talk to god everyday, about my happy moments and about my worries. i never expect an immediate answer, but my faith and trust allow me to live knowing that god has my back. through my faith, i know that i’m going in the right way. the idea that god has a plan, makes my life brighter. for example, this week i was in my calculus class, and http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry amongst the crazy derivatives and midterm stress, i caught myself in an anxiety attack. i stopped, breathed, and remembered that god always has the best intentions and will never put me through something that i can’t handle. i remembered fr. pete’s shoe knot comparison, and just had patience. turns out days later my test went really well. in fact, the day i got into notre dame just reinforced how much my faith is present in my spiritual and professional journey. i was so happy to get my decision back, but then i was like: “is it the right place for me?”. the next morning i woke up and asked god for a sign. i wasn’t expecting anything specific. then i go to order food at my favorite dessert place and i see a chocolate shaped shamrock. i literally got chills, because i order in the same place every weekend and i had never seen it. it ended up being so good that on monday i went to get another one, but it was simply gone. this story is so crazy and insane, but i know i was meant to see that desert at the time. it’s silly, but my faith, along with god’s signs, made me confident of my decision. thank you so much for this opportunity to explore my beliefs. i feel like this might not sound genuine, but it truly is. i’ve been struggling a lot the last couple of weeks with missing home and my tremendous amount of workload. it was priceless to sit down for a few hours and just appreciate what brought me here and the human being that i am :) week 8-integration one root beliefs vs. notre dame throughout my lifetime, i have learned to have specific beliefs. most beliefs are created on how you personally look at certain things. beliefs can also be influenced by close family members and friends. by having moreau, i have been able to deepen my self-knowledge while relating it to my personal development. in the past 7 weeks, we have discussed three main topics. these topics include searching for belonging while balancing your external and internal values, forming relationships with the help of god, and pursuing the truth by learning the entire story of a person. i believe that i am searching for a sense of belonging in society knowing that there needs to be a balance between external success and internal value. the reason why i believe this is because having a sense of belonging while having a balanced life results in a feeling of being accomplished. the reason i am searching for a sense of belonging is because i want to meet new people and create great groups of friends with different backgrounds. i believe that overcoming your vulnerabilities and exposing them to others knowing not everyone will accept who you are is a great way to seek belonging in a society. in week one of the tedtalk, dr. brown said, “the willingness to do something where there are no guarantees”. this quote inspired me to start building up the courage to create a spot for myself at notre dame knowing that the spot is not guaranteed. once a sense of belonging is established, you now have to think if you are internally happy or did you only become involved with that group because it leads to rewards. in week two, david brooks said, “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value”. i think that we as humans only care about what is on the outside. humans know that internal value is important to having great mental health, but it is harder to come by. my belief has been challenged at notre dame. a clear example would be when i joined the sibc project group. i had a hard time overcoming my vulnerability at the first meeting because i was one of few that has never been involved in such a project. i had very little knowledge and experience. at first, i was only doing this group because it is something that i can put on a resume and it is what other people see. in the next couple meetings, i opened up and was able to have a sense of belonging within the group and realized i enjoyed that group and that i was doing it for external success and for my personal internal values. my belief has recently been affecting my actions in a positive way. i am able to overcome vulnerabilities and have a balanced social and personal life. in the future, i plan to not worry about facing failure in society, but focus more on searching for a sense of belonging in different groups around campus that results in internal and external success. i plan to build up more courage and overcome my vulnerabilities to be able to create a spot for myself in society. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships with the help of god. i believe in this statement because whenever meeting someone new i pray to god to tell him to let me know whether or not this will be a good relationship or friendship between us. i have come to this belief because all of my past experiences have dealt with god helping through the problems. in week 3, father pete said, “at the core of oneself is the very presence of god”. god is the reason for everything that happens in your life. god is there to guide you, look out for your mistakes, and show you the love that you deserve in your journey. god will always point you towards the right direction when you are stuck or something needs to be fixed. i believe that god gives hints as to who are considered the “good” and “bad” friends. this week's information relates to welcome week at notre dame. i prayed every night to be able to make long-lasting friendships. almost three months in and i believe i have found some of my lifetime friends. in week 4, the article “5 signs you're in a toxic relationship” states, “friendships should make you feel positive and like you’re investing in something long-term”. all friendships go through ups and downs, and asking god for help will help fix things. there is no reason to be in a relationship or friendship when you see no growth in the future. this belief has personally been challenged recently when i lost the connection with god. i was in a toxic relationship with a boy who made me feel unhappy and like i was being used. i did not do anything about the situation because i did not know what to do. i was not close with god. one day, i decided to say a prayer about the entire situation. he answered. to fast forward, we are no longer together and no longer in touch with each other. this belief affects my actions in a way that i am able to connect with certain people that can be lifetime friends and relationships. in the future, i will make a habit to have a closer and more open relationship with god, so that he will be able to guide me in the right direction and forge life-giving relationships. i believe that pursuing the truth involves knowing all the stories of a particular person that have been told from a reliable source and not assuming stories. i believe that this belief has been created through seeing false information on social media and hearing so many rumors at school. i have come to this belief because there are so many people that assume stories without hearing what the truth is. the truth comes from that particular person or a person that is well connected with that person. i believe that spreading false information leads to more issues than needed. pursuing the truth about people and not creating drama leads to creating a large family. in week 5, father grove said, “notre dame is family”. this is exactly how i feel here at notre dame. the stories i have heard have been true stories from people who actually know what has happened. with that being said, family is created when truth is pursued. pursuing the truth is not always easy because there are people who start drama and spread lies, but for the most part truth is easy to detect. in week 6, we wrote a “where i'm from” poem. these poems expressed our background, who we are, and the things we encounter. in the article, “where i’m from”, it says “that the poem can open into freewriting all the memories of an experience”. if people were to read this, they would pursue the truth about each of us individually. with these poems there is no assuming stories or guessing what the truth is. it is already in place. the topic covered in week 7 really hit home. the quote from chimamanda ngozi adichie states, “power is just not the ability to tell a story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person”. having power allows people to share stories of others. these stories are heard from other people, the person themself, and social media. most stories are twisted around to make yourself sound good, but in reality that is not the true story of that person. that person has a specific story and when people mix up what actually happened, it causes major misunderstandings leading to problems in the future or a picture painted that is not real. power involves sharing a story of another person, but making sure it is true while sharing it. this belief has been challenged here at notre dame. one specific example is during the first couple of weeks, stories that were good and bad about certain people would be shared were not necessarily true. i fell into the trap of spreading stories that i heard from people. some of these students did not know the entire story, including myself, would hear things that were not the exact truth. i have learned that the only way to pursue the truth is hearing the story from the direct source. in the future, i plan to be more cautious when pursuing the truth and taking even more caution when telling stories about others. throughout these 7 weeks of moraeu, i have learned that the beliefs that i was taught are actually put into place at notre dame. this involves making friends, professors teaching, and learning more about myself. moreau has been able to make me think more indepthly about what i believe and how it connects with notre dame. works cited (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) (“should you live for your resume… or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week two) (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.moreau fye week three) (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylormoreau fye week four) (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.cmoreau fye week five) (“where i’m from” by george lyonmoreau week six) (“dangers of a single story” by chimamanda adichiemoreau week seven) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story integration 2 first semester of a new life what have i encountered and how will i respond? this is a very general question that i will try to answer today. it basically asks about my experience connected to all the moroue topics together. it contains a question about my experience here, at norte dame and how i feel about it. i believe it is important to recognize after this first semester what our experience has been like, whether we enjoy it and whether it fits some role in the lifelong pursuit of happiness, which is the driving force for most people. it is what what this country is about freedom and pursuit of happiness. when we realize how the norte dame experience has impacted us and how we feel about it we are able to recognize what we have experienced and then decide how will we respond. for me a big part of the notre dame was the majors chem class that i took. it was insanely hard and at the same time very gratifying. i have truly dealt as if i am drastically expanding my knowledge of chemistry and that i am getting closer and closer to excellence in this subject. i have also realized that i will need to have an engineering background so i transferred from chemistry to chemical engineering, but am still taking the chem majors classes (not because i have to, but because i can). i can truly say i have encountered passion. every time professor brown was showing us a new subject i was extremely excited and curious about the mechanics that govern our world. what before did not seem to me that interesting suddenly became fascinating and there wasn’t a time where i did not want to be there. i liked the challenge that the class posed and i believe i overcame it quite well. i also understood how meaningless partying can be. this was a huge shocker for me. i used to love partying in high school. i realized that what is important is quality time spent with other people, the connections that you make, the impact that you create on your environment ent and how you expand as a person. having momentary fun is meaningless and leads to sadness. easy and comfortable choices lead to a very hard and uncomfortable life. i believe that the true way to achieve happiness is the pursuit of excellence. i understood that i have to master something that gives me joy or i will not be happy. i have also gained a deeper insight into something that i previously had no clue about. as agustin fuentes says : “diversity matters”. i have met a lot of people from many different backgrounds and was fascinated to hear their stories. where i come from there is very little diversity. poland is somewhere around 99% white and 96% catholic. here the community is much more diverse which for me was very exciting. i got to talk to people from all around the world and was able to experience cultures i would otherwise not understand. this really made me realize how important diversity is in communities, since it can provide a new view on many things. i also encountered many inspiring people. people much smarter than me and have learned the art of listening. back i’m my high school i was at the top and while here i’m still one of the best ones in what i do i am definitely far from the best. i understood that in many cases the best thing i can do is just sit and listen. someone once said “speech is silver, but silence is gold”. the professors i have encountered have proven extremely knowledgeable and were able to answer every question that i have asked them. they were guiding me on this journey and i plan to continue it to the best of my abilities. thanks to them i now know i can do it and if i push myself i know i can make it. i also encountered a lot of difficulties. i am going to be honest. none of these we social issues. i am a pretty likable person and the first weekend i was here i had more invites to parties and other events that was possible for me to attend. my problems were of a different nature. it was my first time that i was in a professional scientific setting that was in english. this issue at first seemed huge, but later became very minor and later disappeared completely. i also had struggled with calculus. i did not have calculus before college unlike 99% of students here. that was a problem. i might be really good at chem and physics, but i never was a big fan of math. it was a big challenge that at the first midterm defeated me. in my mind it was just a sign to change my studying patterns and get better. i think that as kristen helgeson says in her video on kintsugi a repaired piece “is more beautiful for having been broken”. i believe that to grow we nead to “break” sometimes. just like muscles rip during training to grow back bigger and stronger a felt that under pressure i would break sometimes only to become better and stronger. at first it was really hard to accept but and then i thought what my father would say if i told him that although i worked hard i did not get the grade i wanted. it would probably be along the lines of “no one cares, work harder”. while it may seem harsh it is definitely true, so that is what i did and it worked very well. in general i believe i have encountered who i truly am and i am embrace it. i believe that the last few months were some of the toughest in my life, but they were also some of the most fun and exciting. i will work harder to become better and stronger. the pursuit of happiness never stops. integration two prince 1 professor oswald moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 nurturing community: self-fulfillment, diversity, unity, and hope a semester into my time here at notre dame, i have had the opportunity to ask myself many important questions as it relates to my academic and social journey. however, one question sticks out in particular: how can i maximize self-growth and find fulfillment when i am experiencing transition? being a freshman at notre dame, it feels at times as if my entire life is in a state of transition. it is my first time living away from my parents and younger brother, my first time relying on myself to complete my homework, my first time finding what to eat for dinner, and my first time doing my laundry entirely on my own. although change and becoming independent is a necessary, important part of growing up, it also makes it easy to feel discouraged. in light of all this change in my life, i have found myself succumbing to high expectations, often being upset when i fall short of them. when i encountered this question of how i can maximize self-growth and find fulfillment, i was inspired by emery bergmann. in bergmann’s project, "advice from a formerly lonely college student", she writes, “it was beyond unrealistic for me to anticipate a seamless transition” (moreau fye week 9). as a freshman at cornell, bergmann expected to have the “time of her life”: making lifelong friends, going to parties, and having a wonderful time. however, she often found herself feeling lonely, falling short of those initial expectations she set for herself. one of the reasons why i really like her project is that i can almost see myself in her shoes. the project, as well as bergmann’s realization, highlight the important point that when we set unrealistic expectations, we fail to recognize that we are not all perfect human beings. as a result, we will eventually be unable to fill every expectation, causing us to feel like we are letting others down or not succeeding like our peers. bergmann’s project has taught me that when i am facing a state of transition, i should accept that i am not perfect and the transition won’t always be “seamless.” for example, when i begin new classes next semester, i should not expect to be perfect in all of https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html prince 2 them. instead, i should accept that i will make mistakes along the way because in the end, that is just part of the journey towards achieving my goals. another takeaway from the project is that i should view social media as a tool for comparison. not only does social media make it easy to compare our lives to others, but it helps fuel the negative aspects of loneliness. when we feel disconnected from others, we tend to feel worse about our situation when we are shown the “best” aspects of other peoples’ lives online. at notre dame, and almost every college, social media is essential because it allows us to meet new people, stay updated on friends’ lives, and so much more. however, i must also consider social media from a different perspective. it is hard to find fulfillment or achieve self-growth when you believe that everyone around you is succeeding when you are not. social media exacerbates these feelings, which can lead to a dangerous cycle of self-deprecation. as i continue my journey here at notre dame, there are two ways i can live out a solution to the question i first posed. first, like bergmann stressed, i must accept that transitions (big or small) won’t be seamless. in doing so, it will be easier for me to handle minor setbacks since i will realize them as part of the growth process. second, i must acknowledge that although social media holds a lot of importance, it also can be dangerous. if i realize that everyone has their own unique path towards achieving their expectations, it will be easier for me not to succumb to self-comparison. in addition to finding fulfillment and self-growth, there is another important question i have been asking myself this semester: how can i foster a supportive community when it is composed of people with differing backgrounds? i cannot think of a better place to experience diversity than in college. take my dorm for example, where my roommate lives 2,000 miles away from me, and my friend next door resides in ireland. as a notre dame student, i have the opportunity to live, work, and laugh in the company of others that are so different from myself. growing up, i was surrounded by a select group of people who although were different in background, shared many of the same experiences as me. coming to college, i have been amazed at how different some people’s life stories have been from mine. although diversity should be cherished, i have often found myself wondering how a community can make progress when its individuals have such different convictions. one example of this is my university seminar course which focuses on the 1619 project by notre dame alumni nikole hannah-jones. sometimes when people talk about race, they feel prince 3 uncomfortable and don’t want to “open up.” in the past, i have often found myself in this same situation because i feel as if i will say the wrong thing even when my intentions may be wholesome. my class is unique because it is one of the first spaces where i feel like i can openly talk about race with my peers. we engage in fascinating conversations about the project itself and racial movements in modern society. however, we have often been unable to determine the “so what” of the project and what the next steps should be towards achieving more social equality. one of the reasons why i think that we have been unable to come to an agreement is that we each hold our own convictions, but we are slightly unwilling to accept the convictions of others. when it comes to the question i posed to myself, i immediately reflect on fr. john jenkins. in his wesley theological seminary commencement address (moreau fye week 10), he states, “can citizens of the united states learn to express their convictions in more skillful, more respectful ways?” the problem today is not that we don’t know what we believe in, but we fail to communicate and implement those convictions. in a diverse community like notre dame’s, it becomes even more important to find an answer to fr. jenkins’ question because the benefits are extraordinary. in his address, he argues that in order to implement our convictions, we must move beyond the evil of hatred in order to focus on the common good. what i take away from this address is that conviction can be corrupted when pride and greed fuel hatred and division. as a responsible community member, i must hold myself accountable to listen to other opinions with an open mind and heart. if we as a community fail to do so, pride and greed will pit us against one another and progress will be nearly impossible. thinking back to my usem class and notre dame in general, when my convictions are in opposition with others, the answer is enver to turn to hatred. instead, i should develop a “both/and” mindset, seeking to incorporate seemingly opposing perspectives to find a collective solution rather than letting my convocation fuel pride and greed. in a community that is vastly expanding in diversity, opening our hearts and minds up to others will inspire unity and progress, not separation. as this semester has transpired, the way i think about how to deal with racism and diversity has become much more nuanced. in the past, i have been taught that the “solution” to racism thought was simply not being racist. although primitive, this statement is correct, but it fails to recognize how much more complicated the idea of diversity and https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ prince 4 race is in our society. drawing back to my university seminar, my class has talked a lot this semester about antiracist thought. when thinking about how antiracism looks in our world today, there are two main goals. first, we must recognize the policymakers and policies that create racist institutions, and second, we must work to dismantle such systems. as a student at notre dame, i think it can be overwhelming to imagine what certain policies that promote antiracism and diversity would look like. instead, i think it is vital to focus on the first goal of acknowledging racism in our community and then doing something about it. in his talk "diversity matters" (moreau fye week 11), professor agustin fuentes provides a plausible solution. fuentes argues that “[patterned differences between races] are due to social, historical, political, economic, and experiential contexts and are changeable.” i really like fuentes’ ideas because he highlights how our society is structured in a way where racism and implicit bias is everywhere. as an example, he talks about an implicit bias test at harvard where ⅔ of participants had a strong automatic association of blacks with weapons and whites with harmless objects. this drives home the point that differential treatment is not only due to the color of one’s skin, but is a culmination of societal systems. however, there is hope in his talk as he states that these patterned differences are “changeable.” in order to create a stronger community, we must challenge our biases by exposing ourselves to different viewpoints and life experiences. however idealistic such a society would be, it is vital that we acknowledge that changing our biases is by no means an easy task since they are so ingrained in our minds and society. when i think about how this applies to my life here at notre dame, i can see how exposing myself to new ideas can come many ways: through discussion with my dorm friends, in class discussions with unfamiliar students, or even in the dining hall with someone i know little about. when i allow myself to open up and consume these differing perspectives, not only do i learn more about my own beliefs, but i inspire interconnectedness within my community. furthermore, in doing so, i will be able to shift some of my own biases, promoting diverse, antiracist thought. to tie all of these important questions and ideas together, i have also been reflecting on what “greater purpose” i am working towards in my life. although the question may seem overwhelming to some, i think it is essential to consider since it allows me to ground my actions and thoughts in this belief. as college students, when we are asked about our purpose in life, i think many people turn their attention towards their career path. however, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 prince 5 my experiences here at notre dame and especially in moreau have taught me that we must turn our attention towards god when we think about our greater purpose. as a mendoza student, i strongly believe there is a stigma associated with business students that our goals and aspirations are materialistic and not fulfilling. stigmas like these are damaging because not only are they untrue, but they divert us further away from being able to recognize what our purpose truly is. i was not able to come up with an answer to my question until the twelfth week of moreau when we discussed hope. before taking moreau, i saw hope as a goal to be reached and the aspiration to achieve this goal. then i read fr. james b. king’s “holy cross and christian education” (moreau fye week 12). fr. king writes, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven.” this passage made me realize that our collective “hope” is to gain “citizenship into heaven.” with that end goal of heaven in mind, hope also influences our actions as humans. hope is not just an aspiration at this point, but it is a way of life. as christians, we must push one another to live our lives according to god’s will, going beyond our comfort zones, questioning new beliefs, and preparing “the world for better times than ours.” what fr. king’s message means to me is that even when things may be hard, we still have a devotion to god and that strength in this hope exacerbates our ability to live out the gospel in our lives. when i think about how this relates to my life going forward both at notre dame and beyond, i think about how i can live in accordance with this end goal of heaven in mind. this can transpire by simply loving others, encouraging diversity both in thought and practice, applying my education to modern day societal problems, or even inspiring hope in those who are hopeless. there is no set of “instructions” that will show me how i should live my life. in the end, i am accountable for my actions. if i realize i am not perfect, cherish diversity, and expose myself to different life experiences, i am certain that not only will i find who i am, but my community will be stronger as a result. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration i conway 1 professor pruitt moreau fye 15 october, 2021 life is good… but can get even better from here root belief #1: i believe that i matter. recognizing your own inherent value and being able to confidently believe that you matter is one of the most important components of living a good, happy life. for me, this belief was hard won and therefore duly appreciated, and reflecting upon my past experiences in moreau has helped me understand this better. i think a fitting place to start is with vulnerability, a very trying virtue for many people, including myself. as a high-achieving student from an academically competitive high school, it is no wonder i have never been one to be vulnerable or, as i thought of it, show weakness. though, when talking with my classmates in moreau and hearing everyone else unabashedly share their stresses, i have begun to feel more comfortable being open with my own trials, whether it be with a friend over a shared ben and jerry’s ice cream, in a class rant about midterm week, or even in this integration assignment. this being said, in the brené brown video from week one of moreau, i really appreciate brown’s quote: “people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe that they are worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). her words resonate with me both because they encourage me to be vulnerable and also because the topic of worthiness has always been prevalent in my life. throughout high school, i didn’t have many friends and being social was extremely difficult because of it. especially considering how high school was such a formative time when everyone was growing up, having fun, and making https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 conway 2 true bonds with others, it was extremely deteriorating to be so isolated. this being said, i struggled a lot with self-worth, and the confident belief that i mattered was challenged often. though, so much of that has changed at notre dame in a way that was almost unimaginably instantaneous. i have made many amazing friends who make me laugh every day and who i am so comfortable with. this is the first time i’ve had a friend group since i was a kid and i am beyond grateful to have a space where together we are “growing to be better people” and “helping each other get there,” as taylor describes in her analysis of a good, healthy friendship (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). this newly appreciated belief is also motivating me to be more confident on a daily basis. sometimes it is only little things such as affirmations, getting to know new people, or telling a joke, but they amount to so much. furthermore, in the week two assignment, i found david brooks’ analysis of our adam i and adam ii natures to be extremely interesting. i especially resonate with his belief that we have to concede part of ourselves to others in order to be able to grow and find our true selves (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i feel that i will better be able to be vulnerable and give myself up to others now, with my belief that i matter firmly held. i am meant to be loved, i deserve to be happy, and i matter. these are simple, yet important, things that my time at notre dame and my reflections in moreau have shown me. root belief #2: i believe that i am searching for truth. truth is a concept universally acknowledged as important and considered an inviolable constant by many, including renowned philosophers such as socrates and plato. despite its normative, cosmic quality, i believe that truth is also something that can be sought after and https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim conway 3 gained in each individual’s life. with this, i also think one of the most important factors in one’s journey to truth is the influence of others. personally, i have been lucky enough to have had extremely powerful and positive influences for my entire life in my parents. my mom and dad are my best friends and, especially as an only child, our bond is extremely strong. i attempted to reflect this formative impact in my week six “where i’m from” poem by contemplating how all the small, seemingly insignificant experiences have shaped me into who i am today (“where i’m from poem” by moreau fye week six). i believe that having my parents to look up to on a daily basis and in the context of my entire childhood has been extremely monumental in developing my identity both personally and as a member of a greater community. at notre dame, using the foundation my parents laid out for me, i can embark on the next, independent leg of my journey. here, i can develop my truths and core values as i discover them. in other words, the experiences i am having are simultaneously forming who i am now and who i will be in the future. this being said, i think a major part of what will make this chapter of my life possible is the environment itself. during moreau we often talk about how different notre dame is to our hometowns, as well as how distinct each of our hometown experiences were to each other’s, and i feel that this coming together of so many dissimilar people will benefit each of our individual journeys greatly. moreover, the classes i am taking are unlike anything i’ve learned about before, and it is fascinating. i can feel myself gaining knowledge and widening my point of view on subjects that i am actually interested in. it isn’t just basic math, english, history, and science like high school, but a specialized, intricate education that will benefit me for the rest of my life, and i am so grateful for this. one of the topics we learned about in week seven of moreau, is the importance of perspective and of constantly widening your viewpoint beyond what it is now. as someone who loves to learn and read and appreciates every chance to increase https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lbvot3fpzhw-ysyzken4ci5ojbbxdkr47cg_ouu3awq/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lbvot3fpzhw-ysyzken4ci5ojbbxdkr47cg_ouu3awq/edit conway 4 knowledge, perspective is incredibly important to me and it is something i never want to remain stagnant in. chimamanda ngozi adichie describes in her ted talk how easy it is to fall into a single understanding, automatically assuming that what you know is the whole picture (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). this being said, while i don’t know if it is possible to grasp universal truth, the more you combine how you see the world with how others do, the closer you can come to understanding it. i truly believe that notre dame will increase my perspective in ways that i can’t even imagine yet, and i am looking forward to growing both in my own personal truths and in those much greater than myself. furthermore, another important aspect in my search for truth is being open to finding it. in her address, carla harris contends that “your ability to manifest your destiny… lies in your ability to adjust your focus, to sharpen your vision on the good and great things that are right in front of you” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i believe that it is a noble trait to be able to see the good things in the world amongst all the chaos. this being said, with practice it can become a healthy way to relate to the world around you, enjoy life inherently, or even just get through the day. for me, one thing i find calming is taking walks and looking at all the small details of the world, for example the clouds, leaves, puddles, and stars. by finding little beauties, i can remind myself of all the big joys i am so grateful for. the students, specifically mariana, in their faith reflections, discussed this power of attainable goods as well (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry moreau fye week three). being able to see the beautiful parts of the world can give a new perspective to your life, and is therefore important in one’s journey to understanding. the connection between seemingly inconsequential parts of life and the greater truths to be found is fascinating to me and i think https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view conway 5 this, along with the influences of my environment, will be a major part of my personal journey to truth. integration one assignmentmoreau 10/14/21 professor whittington balancing tradition in a college environment everybody has heard it: college is a place to open and expand your horizons. this clichè which to most is often overlooked and relatively ignored, contains such a valuable message and influence to my root values and beliefs. i believe that my purpose in life at college is to preserve and express my traditions and culture to others while simultaneously engaging in experiences that open my eyes to the complexities of the world. it is also a root belief that it is fundamental to navigate these new beliefs in a way that is completely supported by my faith. the materials and discussions which i have taken part of during my time at notre dame have already helped me move closer to my purpose because they have allowed me to practice my ability to look at other perspectives in a way that is respectful and constructive. my life thus far has been heavily shaped by the influences of my hometown in rural minnesota, my catholic faith, and my family traditions. since my arrival at the university of notre dame in late august, i have been shocked at the amount of people who have commented on my “canadian” accent and “unique” hobbies. one of these instances occurred during a café-style poetry discussion during moreau class where i mentioned in a verse that “i am from the land of hockey and lakes, in which the cold weather causes many headaches (“i am poem” by moreau fye week six).” when i told my classmates how cold it gets in my state (-60 degrees at times), they were shocked. this was a humorous example of culture shock which seemed to surprise others, but other parts of my customs such as abstinence from drinking have proved more confusing to my peers. to me, it seems like a normal behavior to https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jpdo_rhctyui2d3cxif-1kqsxsqfilzfp0gx3v68zzq/edit?usp=sharing avoid alcohol, but sometimes it is as if every other person on campus is drinking. this is often frustrating because although i don’t judge anyone who drinks, it is hard to find things to do on the weekend when everyone is engaging in activities that are not part of my values. the video "because i love you, double whiskey", which emphasized how friendship dynamics can be changed by substance, truly influenced my desire to treat others with respect even if they are rude or angry when under the influence (“because i love you whiskey” by one love foundation -moreau fye week four). i was originally upset when people tried to get me to go out and drink even when i said no but i tried to maintain my value system and explain patiently why it went against my morals instead of showing my irritation. my outlook on life has stayed steadfast in terms of my cultural values, but there is undeniably room to improve when it comes to connecting to other viewpoints. as a small town midwesterner, i have never really been able to interact with people from unique backgrounds and stories that are different from mine. sure, i have travelled to an array of destinations around the world but even there i never really got a chance to talk with the residents who actually live in these different places. at first, it was hard to imagine existing anywhere other than st. cloud, minnesota, but once i tried to view other perspectives in a more empathetic way i noticed significant results. in david fagerberg’s article “faith brings light to a dark world,” the idea of using faith, hope, and love to clear up self-centered attitudes is emphasized heavily (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). as a political science and biology double major, i get the opportunity to hear a plethora of ideals and values which can be similar or completely different from those that i hold. to integrate my faith and love into my perception of others as fagerberg described, i have had to assess my own preemptive beliefs which have influenced my preconceptions of my new peers. during a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau comparative government discussion earlier in the year, i noticed one of these implicit biases when i felt disgust towards a peer who expressed a viewpoint which was contrary to my own. i was initially hesitant to think of myself as implicitly biased because it is such a politically loaded term in society today. however, after further review i remembered that, as the article “how to think about ‘implicit bias” discussed, it is hard to think about bias because it is not enjoyable to think about our failures (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week seven). despite this disposition, i truly believe that the only way to truly eliminate our negative biases is to look to god and realize that we are all made in his image and likeness. it would not be intellectually honest to say that i am always able to treat people with the love and dignity that god wants us to but, due to my trust in the catholic faith, i try my best to treat myself and others as i think jesus would. growing up with parents who are doctors, my life was influenced by the notion that taking care of your body is foundationally important for the purposes of living a sustainable and productive life. this perspective, while important, fails to recognize the significance of preserving bodily health from a religious and societal point of view. dr. brené brown stated “as it turns out, we can’t practice compassion with other people if we can’t treat ourselves kindly.” which is characteristic of self care (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). in my faith life, i feel that it is especially important to spend time focusing on improving personal struggles so that i can treat others in a pious manner. in addition, i believe that self-focus can help to determine the traits that need to be improved or expressed more in life. if these traits are never discovered, we could lose out on making life meaningful. carla harris mentioned in her 2021 laetare medalist address that using personal attributes to help others is a way to make life significant (“notre dame commencement https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 2021: laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). in fact, i would go a step further and say that it would be a waste of god given gifts to avoid helping others and thus shows a lack of appreciation for the gift of life. through discovery of new characters on the notre dame campus and comparison with my own values and beliefs, i have found that interacting with others is fundamental in shaping character. although my personal features such as self regulation and prudence, which were found on my via adult survey, are important, it is even more crucial that i continue to expand my array of attributes through connection with others (via character strengths survey by via institute on character moreau fye week two). this is not to say that i should abandon my current values and beliefs as they still hold critical importance. tradition is important to individuality and should be conserved, but it is also beneficial to find other perspectives to build a more understanding world. if we cannot improve ourselves and our society, there is no point in life. self betterment is, in my opinion, the most important aspect of fulfilling god’s plan for us because it shows that we care about progressing towards heaven. if a purposeful life is defined as one that serves god then at this stage in my life, i need to make myself better through character improvement so that i can move myself and others towards the perfection that is found in the afterlife. notre dame is a perfect place to start for this mission of expanding my perspective under tradition. if this university continues to be a staple of catholic culture where century long traditions and diversity are valued, i will continue to be able to pursue my root beliefs in a way that is advantageous to my develeopment https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.viacharacter.org/ integration two how will i respond to being in an environment filled with my peers and friends? more specifically, using the quote from julia hogan: “we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens,” (https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau by julia hogan moreau fye week 9) we can look at how failures among peers can be more challenging but equally important when compared to failure among an older audience, especially of people we may not know as well. living at home and going to school pre-k 12th grade, there is a certain ability to get a somewhat fresh start if we fail and choose to run away from our mistakes. there are so many people in a city (i am basing this off my circumstances at home, this is likely not to be true for a resident of a small town) that an ugly end to a friendship may sting and hurt for a while but there are entirely new groups of people to associate with. you don’t even have to be physically near the people. at notre dame, i have encountered a situation where i cannot leave my mistakes since i live, study, and socialize with the same people. i am both surrounded and embraced on all sides while it may seem terrifying knowing that your mistakes will stay with you, it is sometimes more difficult to see that these people will offer forgiveness. i have messed up plenty of times, i have seen some of my good friends stop speaking to each other for nearly a week after a fight, but after each mistake people offer forgiveness. we are all experiencing a scary new world together and encountering forgiveness along the way. no one needs to be perfect and i am so glad i have been learning that i can forgive myself over the course of this semester. i have also encountered not only a wide variety of opinions, but a range of well-reasoned opinions here. i have rarely seen people utter some ignorant and hateful comment because their parents or a tv show was espousing such messages. however, i have had more encounters with needlessly divisive or even outright ignorant and racist speech. yet these are always addressed with good faith no attacking the person’s integrity (even if there may be a great deal of internal judgment) and the people are able to remain close. this seems to be special to a place where diverse and educated thought is encouraged and where prejudiced and hateful and ignorant views are not loudly or even often shared because people mostly do their due diligence and research before speaking. i think this is special to notre dame and other like-minded universities because of a quote from father jenkins: “ a zeal for different opinions concerning religion, concerning government, and many other points ... have ... divided mankind into parties, inflamed them with mutual animosity, and rendered them much more disposed to vex and oppress each other than to co-operate for their common good.” (https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ fr. jenkins moreau fye week 10) here, i have encountered something special where people, albeit divided into parties, have reason and tact enough to approach difficult topics with respect. here, we are able to avoid the disposition to vex and instead are inclined to learn by crashing conflicting thoughts against each other. however, i have noticed that some political hot-topic issues. for example, i have heard very little talk about truly political hot-topic issues such as trump, biden, and abortion. within this larger group of reasonable and sound-minded individuals, i have stumbled upon several smaller communities of individuals who have become friends over the course of the semester. i use the phrase “stumble upon” to show how i have found parker’s concept, shown in this quote “when we try to “make community happen,” driven by desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks—we can make a good guess at the outcome: we will exhaust ourselves and alienate each other, snapping the connections we yearn for.” (http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ parker moreau fye week 11) to be true. from my personal experience, the most engaging and pleasant friends are the friends that result from organic friendships. i tried to force a friendship with one person in my chem tutorial but that was a short lived friendship as i had to consciously try to be an engaging friend. all my best friendships here are with people that engage me naturally and vice versa. i am able to encounter natural communities of honest friendships. we enjoy each-other’s company so there is no great division some small disagreements, sure, but nothing major like that which can arise from artificial friendships. parker’s essay helped me understand this fact, that artificial friendships focused on making ourselves feel appreciated lead to disagreement or discontentment while natural friendships are built on mutual respect and good company. over my first semester, i have encountered far more diverse individuals in so concentrated a space than i have ever experienced before. i feel that this, along with notre dame’s liberal arts education, will prepare me for the world ahead. a view on notre dame’s effects shared by fr. moreau who said: “he came to see his major purposes as a priest and educator first, to re-evangelize adult catholics so they understood the basic principles of their faith and, even more importantly, to provide the young with a first-rate liberal arts education that would enable them to surmount anti-religious prejudice and so slowly transform civil society in the decades ahead.” (https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192206/download?download_frd=1 fr. moreau moreau fye week 12) while we may not be in the midst of a revolution filled with enlightenment and secular ideals, we are challenged with a wide variety of other voices that challenge the world we want to build. in encountering such a wide range of beliefs here, we are becoming prepared to deal with the outside world with tact and with a more cultured and worldly-wise yet faith-filled mindset. in all of these encounters, the key seems to be responding with openness and honesty. in relationships and community we need to let them happen naturally. in terms of hope we must allow it to flow into us. in dissonance we must understand that we make mistakes but honestly take responsibility and be open to growth. in terms of brokenness, we must be open to healing. integration 2 megan leis moreau fye: integration 2 improving my community by first improving myself over the course of my first semester at the university of notre dame, i have been given the opportunity to deepen my self-knowledge and personal understanding. this has called me to reflect on not only my personal development, but on how i can use my own growth to strengthen my relationships and serve others within my community. as i have entered into this new chapter of my life, the moreau first year experience curriculum has challenged me to reflect on this personal development and the ways in which i may continue this throughout the next seven semesters of my notre dame experience and education. although the adjustment was tough at times throughout the semester, the relationships i have formed and the experiences i have gained have made my time unforgettable. throughout this first semester at the university of notre dame, i have been asked to reflect on various questions pertaining to my growth and experience over the course of the past few months, as well as how i can continue to grow in the future. the first question that i was asked to reflect on was “how do i respond to external and internal dissonance?” while pondering this question, i thought about the societal and personal pressures that i experience every day. even if i attempt to ignore them, they still remain present. the quote, “the people in both of these situations set expectations for themselves that symbolize their worth as people. but it comes at a cost.” sums up this idea well (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan: moreau fye week 9). these pressures to achieve certain standards and goals are ever present, whether they come from within your own thoughts or the people who you surround yourself with. it has been argued that these pressures are increasing due to social media and increased photo altering online, especially within younger populations. teenagers and kids now have more access to the internet and media, therefore https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau megan leis moreau fye: integration 2 increasing the amount to which they compare themselves to unrealistic expectations that they see online. many people experience imposter syndrome due to things that they see online. they compare themselves to an impossible standard, and therefore they are never able to accept that they too are good enough and don’t need to achieve the impossible expectations. they fail to realize that social media is only a highlight reel of someone’s life and does not accurately reflect their daily endeavors. comparing yourself to others and things that you see online often comes at a cost. these costs are often both physical and mental, and are caused by an outside pressure to fit a specific standard. after taking time to think about how these pressures affect my life, i have made a conscious effort to not let them affect my life as much and not take a hold over me. although i acknowledge that these pressures will always be present, how i handle and deal with them is in my control. to combat these societal challenges, i have learned that we must learn to accept ourselves for who we are and acknowledge our worth and strengths. the next question i was asked was “what are the central challenges of my community and how do i respond?” my reflection around this question focused on how my community and i can take a stance to educate both children and adults on the injustices happening all around us. the quote “many school leaders formally apologized for this harm, but this group understandably desires more than words. they demand that their schools implement curriculum, student formation, hiring and programmatic measures to promote greater diversity, equity and inclusion (d.e.i.). they want to see accountability and progress in meeting measurable goals in these areas.” sums up the core of this topic (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher devron: moreau fye week 10). this quote stood out to me because it discusses the concept of accountability. although many people will speak on topics related to race and injustice, they often fall short when it comes to acting on what they say. as the quote https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 megan leis moreau fye: integration 2 says that the school leaders apologized verbally for what they did, the apology cannot truly be sincere or accepted until they show evidence of how they plan to right their wrongs and attempt to make up for what they have done. i believe that it is very important to show your intentions through actions and not solely just words. from thinking critically about this question and topic, i learned that in order to foster a community of growth, love, and acceptance, we must all first recognize the beauty and dynamic nature of ourselves and those around us. the next question i was asked was “how do i strengthen bonds of interconnection with others, especially in the midst of conflict or dissimilarity?” my reflection around this question focused on how i can promote connection between others who are different from me. this is accurately portrayed through the quote “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy.’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer: moreau fye week 11). this quote discusses one way in which we can aid in the formation of community among people who have seemingly significant differences. although some people in a group may not get along, it is important that steps are taken to build relationships between people who perceive each other as an enemy. creating bonds between people possessing opposing opinions is important in the process of creating a cohesive and inclusive community. even in the midst of conflict or dissimilarity, it is necessary that the people within a community work to understand each other and make a conscious effort to get along. while pondering this topic, i thought about and learned about many ways in which i can work on promoting community and connecting with people who are different from me in all aspects of life. the last question i was asked was “how do i live and grow in hope?” when thinking about this question, i guided myself by pondering how we can best encounter genuine hope and remain hopeful throughout hardship. the “screwtape letters” by cs lewis and the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ megan leis moreau fye: integration 2 “introduction to the screwtape letters by cs lewis” touch upon the fact that the devil is a liar and attempts to screw with and tempt humans. this is exhibited in the quote, “screwtape, as a demon assigned to tempt and destroy humans, repeatedly refers to god as ‘the enemy’ and the devil as ‘our father below.’” (“introduction to the screwtape letters by cs lewis” compiled for moreau: moreau fye week 12). when we acknowledge the fact that the devil is the enemy and love lies only with god, we make a conscious effort to live in truth and grow in hope. in order to live a life filled with hope, we must work on our relationship with god and make an effort to steer away from the devil and his trap. in order to do this, we must learn to love and do god’s will. through thinking about this question, i have concluded that, for me, the best way to encounter and grow in genuine hope is to trust in god and his plan for me. throughout the course of my notre dame experience, i have been asked to ponder challenging questions and think about how they relate to my everyday life and my interactions with others. concepts that i had not previously considered have now become integral parts of my belief system and being. i have been given the opportunity to deepen my self-understanding and reflect on not only my personal development, but how i fit into my larger community. as i continue on this journey and this new chapter in my life, i hope to continue to grow as a person, learner, and constructive contributor to my community. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28217/files/192396?module_item_id=108738 the utopia that humanity dreams of the “impossible” dream of a utopia of happiness. when presented with the question “what are we here for ?”. many struggle with such a question as the answers could be quite literally infinite. some, however, have the answer to that question on their mind at all times as they themselves have decided that answer as their life went on starting from their childhood, but is that answer truly what they desire or an idea implanted into them by others ? that idea itself, while it might come around through their environments and their experiences, it is usually not their true desire but what they believe their desire to be. it is also true however that the answer is also their true desire that they resonate with deeply. for me, the answer is pursuing the medical field. it is something that i myself have been interested in since i knew what it even was, but it can also be argued that it’s an idea my parents had implanted in me ever since i was a young child. while i believe to be passionate about this field, i myself have no idea if it is really what i want, but when i think about it, i believe that it is what fits me best, no matter if it was me who wants to do it or if it were my surroundings that changed my desires into that. there is not something particularly special about me that leads me to be in the medical field, more accurately the neurosurgery part of it. it is but a desire that many people have. i believe that nobody was truly born to do something and that anybody can really be anything they want if raised through a specific way starting in their childhood. to be quite honest, the financial stability i will gain through that career is quite an important factor, as the medical field is quite known to be able to support its participants quite well, but it is not the only reason. i’ve always wanted to explore the human mind's innerworkings and research the cures diseases that have plagued humans for so long. the consciousness of the mind is a mystery that we have yet to explore, one which we know nothing about so far, and i am interested in that mystery. a lever for me to change the world would be that mystery itself. while humans are naturally afraid of the unknown, it is also something that excites us. it is something that drives us to discover and research, to advance and conquer, a beautiful concept that has always fascinated me. if we are to discover those innerworkings and mysteries of the human mind, we can practically cure the disease that is suffering and dullness so many people experience on a daily basis, and i honestly believe that idea to be extremely beautiful. a world without suffering, a world without sadness, a world where one does not go through a chemical imbalance occuring in their brain to cause sadness and pain, a world where everyone can be happy. in a general sense, achieving that utopia of happiness is a long shot dream of humanity, after all the definition of a utopia is an imaginary fantasy of a perfect world that we ourselves make under perfect conditions, but so what ? dreams and desires of humans are endless, we have achieved the impossible over and over again, the will of humanity is a hope of light amongst the darkness of a world covered in darkness, that darkness being the wars, suffering, the violence, this imaginary utopia which we know is a fantasy in itself guides us forward for a better future, all dreams are dreams until we ourselves achieve them. a singular person can not make change on their own, however they can take the initiative to cause that change, to drive people to the right path, to unite us to truly know what is right and what is wrong, unity is one of the strongest powers that humans have at their disposal, but it is quite hard to take that initiative. one might say “why do i have to do it” or “someone else can at a later time”; however, when that person takes the responsibility of taking the lever to move the world, that is where humanity truly shines with their dreams and accomplishments and somehow manage to achieve what they themselves have considered impossible. in the case of students here at notre dame, i believe that every single student has the qualities to become a leader of the future, to pave the way for future generations to come for a brighter future, this utopia that we have always dreamed of, perhaps it can be achieved by the current generation of people that have grown in a world covered by darkness. during my experience in notre dame, i have met many people that have had all kinds of experiences, it showed me that a change in the world is needed, and also quite possible. having hope is not a bad thing, but being too optimistic about the future is not a good thing either. having an outlook on life that not everything is right is not the right thing to do either, while it is true that the world can sometimes be a horrible place, when someone looks at the beauty of our planet and all the accomplishments we have managed to achieve as a species, it puts things in perspective about what we can truly accomplish if we just overlook all the violence and evil that lurks in the world. that is where this generation and all the future generations come in, we move the future, we are the ones who hold this lever of success in our possession, and we will move the world with this lever of hope. integration #1 ismail nashwanmoreau integration my name is ismail nashwan, but i usually go with soma as a nickname that my peers call me. i was born on february 28th 2004, meaning im younger than most students on campus, which has it’s pros and cons, and while it may be unique, it is who i am. i was born and raised in the country of palestine, a country of which conflict and violence is just part of life in general. as a person with a childhood in palestine, there is alot about the world that i personally see very differently. while everybody goes through something during their life, it is infact a part of life to go through struggles, there are specific different experiences that only people who have been part of can understand how it is like, while it might seem traumatizing to some, to me and most of my peers from palestine, we regard war and violence as just a natural part of living in palestine. we cope with it by laughing and making jokes, something someone in the military might relate to in a twisted way, which is precisely why it’s so hard to communicate my feelings of it for other people. however; my moreau class itself has definitely showed me that some of what i thought isn’t actually true, some people see the different experiences they’ve been through as similar to one thing, and that is having hope in the future and facing your anxieties and “abnormalities” head on, and understanding that some people won’t really relate to how numb you are to something they might consider and is traumatic. a quote that fits this perfectly was said by dr. brene brown “the one thing that keeps us out of connection is that we’re not worthy of connection” (dr. brene brown, the power of vulnerability week 1 qqc). i believe that connection is something that everyone is capable of, however due to everyone having their own different life, that they can not truly relate to each other, but it is just not true, i myself have had one of my classmates feel a sense of relatability to me even though we have been through very different experiences. humans are compassionate and kind to each other, while people might not be able to understand what exactly someone has gone through, they understand that it is something that affected them deeply, because they too have been through something that affected them as well. i have a root belief that inherent evil in someone simply does not exist, there are certain environments that change someone into becoming someone with no empathy or compassion to someone else; however i also believe that just like their environments change someone into someone who would be considered a bad person, just the same way an environment can change someone for the better. people are actually inherently good, people want to do good but they feel like something is stopping them, they feel like doing good would seem unnatural to other people, and if someone were to be approached with help, we are at the state that someone would think help is due to ulterior motives, which is not entirely untrue in some cases, but that only makes the state in which we are right now as a society, as a race, worse. i believe that for someone to grow as their most authentic self they would need to go out of their comfort zone, they need to share their life and experiences with people who have also had different experiences and journeys, they should have the courage to know that no matter what they have been through, people will understand them and talk to them and relate to them in some way. “we live in a perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (david brooksshould you live for your resume or your eulogy week 2 qqc2) now this quote is more about what we think of ourselves in comparison to what desires we might want in life, and that still relates to who we are as a person. sometimes, people are driven to act in a certain way or be a certain way due to a desire they think they want from their peers and others, while they themselves might have a desire that they themselves do not know; and talking about experiences to other people and being authentic to one’s self does help in figuring out the journey a person thought they wanted to go through in contrast to a journey they want but just don’t know it yet. stories are also a very major part of growing up as a human being. we listen to stories from all kinds of different people, stories that are inspiring, stories that are sad, stories of experiences we haven’t been through yet can relate to in a way we ourselves don’t understand, those stories shape who we are and we do not even know it. we hear a story of someone doing something good for the world and that drives us to better ourselves, to want to be like that person, but we just do not know how to until we are met with a similar situation that we have heard about in those stories. what someone does with their life depends on who they are inspired by, what they want also depends on who their role model is, perhaps a story of our parents becoming successful after a rough childhood, my father personally grew up as an orphan with my grandma barely getting by through selling knitted clothes and cultural imprints, and how he has grown to protect my uncle and how he focused on being a mathematician, becoming a professor in a university now; hearing something of the sort inspired me and made me proud of my father, but it also made me want to be proud of myself, to do something equivalent to what my father did, i wanted him to be proud of me just like me being proud of him, and so i’ve acquired this mindset of never giving up on something just like he did, if someone wants something, they should grasp onto it with all their might, and face life with who they are and what they want proudly. we live our lives not for the desires of other people, but for our desires. we want to do with our life what we want, and for that to happen we must become our own authentic selves and find what our true desires are. as father kevin said ““our lives are not resumes, it’s just being who we are.” (fr.kevin grove, c.s.c week 5 qqc5) we do not live for other people, we live for us, we live to make our own stories that might inspire people after us, we become our authentic selves along our lives, it is indeed just us being who we are. integration 2 sandy nam nam 1 sandy seungyeon nam professor espeseth moreau fye 3 december 2021 a semester i learned and experienced so much from i looked back on what i’ve encountered this semester, and honestly, it was the most fulfilling, enriching, and interesting semester i’ve experienced at notre dame. i’ve got to be an international ambassador and serve incoming international students. i helped them get adjusted to campus and even toured them, which were roles i always dreamed of doing once i got into college. i got to become more involved in research and finally discerned what type of research i would like to pursue in the future years as an undergraduate student. i attended boxing practices and even went to the morning ones at 6:30am! i went to parties and hung out with my friends like i never had before. i took a one day trip to chicago, a fall break trip to florida, and a thanksgiving break to my friend’s house in wisconsin. i got to meet some of the most amazing people as well that i would have not expected to meet in the past. frankly, i can say this was one of the most interesting and busiest periods of not only notre dame, but my entire lifetime. surprisingly, the busy schedule made me feel the urge to maintain integrity in “following my passion” and “what my heart “truly desired”. i have been involved in a certain research lab for about two semesters, and i formed great relationships with the main graduate student of our project. the work i’ve done in the lab was insightful and interesting, but from a certain point, i realized that i was mostly engaged because of the skills i was learning, not the actual content of the project. i actually now yearn to dig deeper into neurological connections and neural degeneration. although it is a difficult field to engage in and contribute to, i think the message nam 2 by father james can be a great motivation for me to keep up with my passion and continue with my research goals. “we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). after all, the idea of hope is not something that only religious people get to experience or develop. non-religious people and activities also at times need a leap of faith to progress, and during such moments, hope is needed for determination and dedication. positive dreams and anticipation are sometimes the only thing you can count on in uncertain times (i.e. like nowadays) and you can only go ahead towards a goal once you begin to take a step. this quote exactly describes how hope can assist in educational processes and how taking new opportunities with leaps of faith this semester has made it so much more interesting and enriching. another passion that i discovered was that i loved working with kids. i figured this out as i was volunteering at the robinson community learning center. i got to connect with a 7th grade student who really enjoys his tutoring session and always greets me with the warmest welcome every time i visit. it reminded me of the kintsugi workshop video. i have never seen anything like such before, and i was surprised by the goodness it brings ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grotto moreau fye week ten). while breaking pottery and putting it back together might seem like such a tedious and meaningless job to others, its symbolic meaning was recognized and appreciated by victims of household violence or scars of love. the way such victims grew and overcame their hurtful past through this activity is a remarkable phenomenon, and i was inspired how certain individuals like kirsten helgeson helped out her community’s central challenge by sharing her own experiences. i also wanted to https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau nam 3 become another individual who can give back to the community with the stories and skills i have. similar motivation made me want to become a doctor. “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” "thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer, center for courage & renewal, moreau fye week eleven). i had grown up all my life hearing, from different institutions and social gatherings, about different communities for us to build together. a good community, meaning an utopian society, was what people often said we should try to achieve. however, this quote put me into perspective. utopia is something we all know that we can never achieve. why work hard towards something that we can’t achieve when we have diversity and reality so much better than the aspired perfection? as a member of a community i appreciate, i would like to give back by healing others, making them less sick, and help the underprivileged to feel less of their deprivations. compared to last semester, everything is better. except for one thing. i still haven't figured out a way to let myself go on necessary moments, and i think my major academic stress always sources back to myself and no one else. “the point is, these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life. there are other options out there.” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan, grotto moreau fye week nine). an advice that i have frequently heard from both my friends and teachers during highschool was “don’t be so hard on yourself”. until then, i didn’t realize that i was being merciless to myself. i simply thought that i deserved to think that i was incompetent and shortcoming because the errors and mistakes were the result of my laziness and lack of caution. reading this quote somehow soothed the anxious side of me and reminded me of the advice from my highschool teachers and friends. i keep forgetting about it, but when i look at the quote, i http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau nam 4 know that it was a message i needed to hear. i hope that someday i will know more about who i am. i hope that i know my own limitations as well my competences, so that i will gracefully accept the results i’ve achieved with my best efforts. this will be my goal for the next years of my college career. moreau integration ii professor hnatusko moreau fye 3 december 2021 integration ii: finding my people and looking forward i have encountered loneliness and will respond by broadening my horizons. frequently this semester, i have grown angry with myself after seeing hordes of friends at the dining hall, taking pictures in front of the main building, or studying at the library together. i felt, for sure, that the reason why i did not have this huge friend group was because of wrongdoing on my end: i spoke too loudly or too much, did not wear the right clothing or makeup and preferred to play board games rather than go out on friday nights. i missed so dearly my friends back home with whom i shared so many memories, and i greatly missed the happiness that high school brought me. these thoughts turned into questions such as “did i peak in high school?” and “what am i doing wrong?” i soon realized that just because i did not immediately find my people at notre dame did not mean that i peaked in high school, nor did it mean that i was doing anything wrong. emery bergmann, a cornell student, touches on this subject of loneliness, stating, of her experience, “expecting close relationships like the ones that had taken years to develop was unfair to myself and the people around me” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9 ). i reflected on how i had felt four years ago when i stepped into my high school for the first time. i remembered that it took months of experiences and memories and trying new things until i found the people i https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html came to care for so strongly. i had to try new things -clubs, sports, and classes -to meet my very best friends. i decided to take the same approach at notre dame. i signed up for the club swim team and joined ndtv. i asked people in my classes out for lunch and began to talk to anyone and everyone i ran into. while it hasn’t been perfect -i still feel times of loneliness and homesickness -i feel that i have made significant progress in expanding my comfort zone and meeting new people. i have encountered brokenness and will respond by surrounding myself with those i love. in broadening my horizons by trying new things, i have encountered people and activities that i do not get along well with or enjoy. though often, especially when finding that friends i made during welcome weekend don’t share the same interests that i do, it is hard to let these people or activities go, i remember that nothing is permanent, but that everything i do must be out of love and care for myself. self-care is essential when you are living on your own for the first time, and a significant component of self-care is to surround yourself with people who love and care for you. according to father john jenkins, “love is the deepest human need. each human has a deep spiritual, psychological, emotional longing for love. and not to get it injures us deeply” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). i find that when i am sad, a quick facetime call home to my family or getting dinner with a friend who always makes me laugh is a very successful remedy. this is because these things remind me that i am loved. it is so easy, especially when navigating college life for the first time, to forget about all of the people who got you where you are today or the people who you have met on your journey together. though my days often get hectic, i always try to socialize with family and friends to remember that i am never alone. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ i have encountered difficult experiences and will respond with an openness to different perspectives. being at notre dame for four months, it is inevitable that i have faced some experiences that i have found frustrating. coming into college, i didn’t exactly realize that specific experiences would be as difficult as they came to be; notre dame was my dream school, after all. i had figured that my classes would be difficult and cause frustration at times, yes, but i had believed that this would be the extent of my hardships. it was unexpected to face conflict in my living situation, or between friends that i thought, upon meeting them, would be at my wedding. but these experiences are unavoidable and build character. according to parker j. palmer, “hard experiences -such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others -are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway to the real thing” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). having to face turmoil with my roommate and friends was no easy task; it was uncomfortable and awkward at times, especially living and sleeping in the same room. but i realized i grew immensely as a human being in dealing with these situations, and i gained some new life lessons and perspectives along the way. in facing conflict with my friends, i found other outlets to turn to in times of hardship. in disagreements with my roommate, we both learned and picked up hobbies from each other. though these conflicts were difficult, they allowed me to expand my perspectives and grow as a person. i have encountered days of despondence, and i will respond by finding hope in the lord. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ overall, i have greatly enjoyed my short time at notre dame and happily look forward to the spring semester and the years to come. however, there have been days where i feel hopeless. there are weeks and weeks until i can go home and see my family. it is dark out until 8:30 in the morning. i have to drag myself out of bed to go to my 8:20 microeconomics class. in times like these, it is so difficult to have hope. however, as difficult as it is, i always try to remind myself that there are always things to appreciate and always reasons to look forward to the future because of the lord. fr. james b. king, c.s.c states, “still, the first four principles of mind, heart, zeal, and family, important though they are, would have little distinctive christian purpose apart from hope in the cross of christ” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week 12). according to king, christ is the glue that holds everything together and creates purpose in the world. while i understand the importance of maintaining good study habits and relationships with family and friends, i realize that these things would be insignificant if it weren’t for christ. therefore, i always cut out a portion of my week to attend the basilica mass or ryan hall’s biweekly masses. i feel that this peaceful reflection allows me to wind down from a long week and remember that there are always reasons to be grateful and hopeful for the possibilities of the future. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186051?module_item_id=102825 10-14-21 the catalyst for verisimilitude and rectitude moreau first year experience has been an insightful experience as it has encompassed the facets of equity and has introduced me to a diverse array of perspectives. both racial and religious experiences have been highlighted through the profound discussions i’ve indulged in. the concepts of hope, reverence, family, and propositional knowledge were accentuated and profoundly espoused throughout the class. “hope anchors the soul. hope directs our desire to its true end” by david fagerberg’s (faith brings light to a dark world by professor david fagerberg – moreau fye week three) provides clarity on the path that people can take to advance on their journey to absolution and self-discovery. along with hope, fagerberg suggests that love is a crucial aspect of human life that holds us together and shows us optimism in times of sadness and injustice. i agree with fagerberg's metaphor of a night window in which we see ourselves in a vulnerable state in the dark, while during the day we see the world and our interaction with it. in short, faith is the source of light that overlooks darkness and enables us to find meaning in the world. david fagerberg's metaphor about the appearance of windows in light and darkness deeply moved me because society often views itself with a pessimistic lens that emphasizes its own vulnerabilities rather than focusing on the light of the world itself. like fagerberg, this analogy fired my imagination and forced me to ask the question: "how do we really see ourselves and how does our self-perception affect our view of the world?" i have come to the conclusion that when we find no meaning in the world, we wrap ourselves in a bubble of constant concern about how we perceive ourselves rather than how we perceive the world. the quote "nothing feels worse than being used in any relationship" from article 5 signs that you are in a toxic friendship speaks to the immense dangers of being in a manipulative relationship and constantly tolerating abuse (five signs you’re in a toxic relationship by olivia t. taylor – moreau fye week four) any relationship that is made up of inequality, lack of openness and injustice is one that is https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ 10-14-21 not worth being a part of, regardless of its indirect benefits. olivia supports this point by explaining that a friend who cannot hear you and who repeatedly ignores a conversation because it is "uninteresting" or "boring" is a source of toxicity in a relationship. it is important to keep in touch by discussing fruitful topics in a mutual and respectful way; otherwise, the relationship has no positive value. although i have never been in a toxic relationship, i understand how an unhealthy relationship can invade various parts of our lives and damage our physical and mental health. often, it is those who are too focused on drama who also talk about the people behind their backs; therefore, it is important to avoid these people. whenever you notice red flags like constant drama and argument, it's important to recognize how these negative values have affected you and to consider deviating from that the two notre dames quote "from here you can bring to our human family the only hope that is permanent" illustrates the monumental effect that can be created when participating in a network of family relationships (two notre dames by fr. kevin grove – moreau fye week five). grove emphasizes the word "family" to empower freshman audiences to build strengthening relationships with one another. sometimes when we find ourselves in an abyss, we can rely on the people we associate with to pull us out of that abyss. i can also rely on the friendships i have developed in my classroom and the resources that notre dame offers to pave the way to success and prosperity. carla harris spoke eloquently about the dangers of imposter syndrome and the importance of being proud of our authenticity. our distinctive personality and repertoire catapult us into opportunities. the resort to putting a facade on ourselves puts us in an uncomfortable corner where we must stick to expectations that do not represent who we are. regardless of the situation, i always try to show myself in my true light. just as harris emphasized authenticity, i emphasize the power of truthfulness. the quote "the second reserve of knowledge of propositional knowledge, which is the kind of knowledge we acquire through reason, logical evidence, and careful analysis" illustrates reservations about presumptive reasoning and how the social tendency to presume before assimilation is deeply https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 10-14-21 rooted in the penetration of implicit bias (how to think about ‘implicit bias’ by keith payne – moreau fye week seven). it is important to share the various stories that tell the experiences and needs of minorities. the biases behind preconceived notions neglect the crucial and immensely monumental narratives that people must tell. payne reiterates this sentiment by stating that, regardless of political affiliation, we collectively add an implicit bias to a developing society of preconceived notions. payne explains that a variety of studies have led to the conclusion that all people, from work to school, have preconceived notions that destroy egalitarianism and empathy. in some cases, these "perceptual illusions" are rooted in emotional response to unorthodox appearances and colloquial language. furthermore, "field experiments" continually demonstrate a framework of "real discrimination" that harms minorities. despite the evidence, payne contends that most experiments are inconclusive and are based on correlation rather than causality. as compelling as the evidence is, i agree with payne. it is more dangerous to mix correlation and causation for the sake of a conclusion than to simply leave the concept of implicit bias in a nebulous conclusion. “we live in a culture with an adam i mentality where we’re inarticulate about adam ii”. this quote speaks to an ongoing trend in society where we prioritize our skillsets in a capitalistic medium rather than focusing on our internal character (should you live for your resume…or your eulogy? by david books – moreau fye week two) furthermore, our outward propensity to build upon our skills neglects the underlying importance of having a strong spirituality, inner-consistency, and being modest with ourselves. books’s presentation serves as a candid reflection on society and the marketplace as we’ve blinded ourselves from the topic of self-care in the interest of being marketable in a profession. after taking the survey, my signature strength was defined by my ability to speak the truth and, more broadly, be able to present myself in a genuine way. i was surprised by how highly the survey ranked my love, creativity, and spirituality as these are ideas, i don’t realize i implement throughout my day. tying this survey to brooks’s presentation, i would say i land on the side of adam 2 since i prioritize internal https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim 10-14-21 characteristics such as love and spirituality; meanwhile, resume virtues such as perseverance and ambition are categorized as my “middle strengths”. so although i capitalize on my internal health, i remain wary of the traits that would be make me favorable within the sphere of capitalism. “they [the study group] believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful. they didn’t talk about vulnerability being comfortable nor did they talk a bout being excruciating as i had heard earlier in the shame interviewing,” (the power of vulnerability by brene brown – moreau fye week one). the quote illustrates that despite acknowledging their various flaws and shortcomings, people who are courageous accentuate every aspect of themselves. individuals with this caliber of selfconfidence constantly take risks that may or may not work in their favor; this is what makes them so distinct. in a broader sense, dr. brown outlines the differences between optimism and pessimism, and how confining to these values produces wildly different outcomes. i thought dr. brown’s approach to vulnerability was really insightful as it outlines why society must balance its societal expectations such that we avoid excessive pessimism and optimism. these two sides of the spectrum affect our life and the future generations that follow our footsteps. i feel that this is a really vital video to watch because as i become more aware of my vulnerabilities at notre dame it’s important that i remain level-headed. in the past, i’ve found myself lost in an abyss of insecurity and hubris because i struggled to deal with my vulnerabilities. after this video, i understand why being overly confident about my decisions can blind me from the potential consequences. conversely, being excessively insecure about making decisions can restrain me from succeeding. fortunately, notre dame has understanding professors that openly encourage its students to visit during office hours to refine their skills. my poem revealed my authentic self and showcased how my background forged my personality. the morals i adhere are a direct result of the people and environment i surrounded with. the blog we discussed about how people would make assumptions about where we’re from rather than having the propensity to learn outlines the dangers of preconceive notions (where i’m from by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six) https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html 10-14-21 ultimately the class amalgamates the importance of rectitude and understanding new perspectives. i recall learning about the caveats of being in a toxic relationship as well as the perceptual illusions rooted in the emotional response to unorthodox appearances and vernacular. also, the facets of being in a toxic relationship were outlined in class as we brainstormed ways to circumvent being trapped in a toxic relationship. additionally, the concept of implicit bias sparked a profound discussion in class about presumptive reasoning and the dangers associated with it. it’s important to have people that one can rely on to lift from a state of demotivation. the class highlighted the ways in which one must assimilate different perspectives and, most importantly, feel welcomed at notre dame. integration 2.pdf shari ho 11/30/21 my experiences before coming into college, i didn’t expect to notice or care about the change i was about to experience in my new life, but i was completely wrong. all aspects of my life were affected, and in this essay, i will be explaining each aspect while incorporating the material we learned in weeks 9-12 of class. the first thing i will talk about relates to julie hogan’s article about expectations from others, as she stated, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine) in high school, i was very content and confident about myself because i had friends i trusted and knew would never judge me. i am not the skinny, pretty girl you would see on instagram, but because i had such good friends, this didn’t matter to me. and i think because of this, i was more outgoing, had the desire to go out and spend time with my friends, and overall, i enjoyed their company. i trusted that they truly wanted to hang out with me and genuinely cared for me. however, coming to college, i did not know anyone. i didn’t know their intentions or thoughts, as one wouldn’t know when meeting new people, but this really affected me. society’s expectations of what girls “should” look like really got into my head and affected how i interacted with new people. i would ask myself, “do they really want to talk with me?” because i do not look like the typical skinny girls in my classes. and because i did not have that trust i had with my friends back at home, i was not comfortable being myself around new people. the students did not have expectations or judgment towards me, but i assumed they did because of how i looked, and because of this, i did not attempt to get to know a lot of people when i came to college. i was so shocked by this, as i was such an outgoing person in high school, but here, my assumptions of others and society’s expectations held me back from being myself and getting to know others. i think the quote stated above is very important for me to think about. even though it’s easier said than done, i know that letting go of these assumptions and society’s expectations will help me be myself and help me open up, but for some reason, it is so hard here. however, another big part of why i assume the worst of others is race. the next big difference i have experienced when coming to college is race. i am from hawaii and there is so much diversity in my community. for example, at my high school, white students were the minority and all of the girls in my friend group were people of color. because of this, i was so comfortable and familiar with going to school with many asian students and minorities in general. i didn’t think the change in racial distribution would affect me, but it did. when i first came to notre dame, a predominantly white institution, during welcome week, i noticed when i was meeting everyone, the white girls and guys did not give the same energy to me as they were giving to other white students. i was not expecting this at all, as i did not experience this racially motivated treatment before, whether intentional or not. the girls did not seem interested in talking to me, but when they started talking to other white girls, they laughed and engaged in conversation and same with the guys. after this, my whole outlook on the students at notre dame changed, and as a result, is the main reason why i make these assumptions i talked about above. even though not every student treats minorities like this, how do i know which students are nice and which aren’t? since i can’t read anyone’s mind and i do want to waste time on people who won’t give me the time of day, i don’t even attempt to get to know anyone. this mindset further divides the issue of racial inequality, and i need to remember that racism is not a fact. in the diversity matters video, the presenter said, “if race, as we use the term, is not a reflection of biological groups, then the real differences that we see between races, are actually based on not biological characteristics. but social, historical, political, and economic components, and most importantly because of that, they're changeable.” (“diversity matters” by kevin abbott moreau fye week eleven) this quote and concept are very powerful and are the reason why i say racism is not a fact. since the beginning of time, it wasn't a law that white people are superior to black people or white people are superior to asian people, etc. racism is a made-up concept that humans created and because of this, we can change this. knowing this can help me get rid of my assumptions about others. since racism is not a universal truth, some people are good and i need to give them a chance. i can’t just push aside everyone because there is a possibility of racist treatment towards me. this is also easier said than done, as i will be very hurt if someone treats me differently because of my race, but remembering the quote above, i know there are good people out there, and i will never get a chance to meet them if i don’t open up. the third thing that changed drastically is my views on academics. in high school, i did very well. i am not sure if the classes i took were easy or if covid affected the class curriculum, but i feel like i didn’t do a lot of work or homework and i passed pretty easily. and because i attended one of the best schools on the island and the fact that i was doing well made me feel like i was a pretty smart student. however, when coming to notre dame, i felt like i was ambushed by the amount of work and level of difficulty of each class. for some time, i was staying up until 7 am trying to finish my work and i was on the verge of having a mental breakdown every night. i wasn’t procrastinating and i was always doing work, having to sacrifice time with my friends to get my work done. however, my friends did not seem like they were struggling at all, and some of them are pre-med as well. i did not know what was going on. in high school, i strived to get all a’s because i had the ability to and i was hard on myself if i did any worse. here, however, it is so hard to do well even though i am trying my hardest in every class. in the beginning, i was beating myself up for not getting the grades that i wanted, but over the semester, i have learned to not get mad at myself if i did not get the perfect 100 and if i did my best. i saw much connection with my changed mindset and the women find healing through kintsugi workshop video, as kirsten helgeson said, “believing that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten) i saw many interpretations of this statement, but relating to my revelation, helgeson’s quote is saying that it is okay to fail, make mistakes, and being perfect and getting 100’s on everything does not have to be the standard. i know i am working my butt off every day, and recognizing my effort and not letting my grades bring me down was a big step for me in my college experience. the last thing that was very different when coming to college is my participation in the catholic church. the holy cross and christian education document stated, “in both light and shadow, the cross is christ’s gift to us, our only hope.” (“holy cross and christian education” by notre dame campus ministry moreau fye week twelve) this raises the topic of religion and specifically, catholicism, and how it plays a role in our lives. when i lived at home, my parents would make me go to church every sunday. i use the words “make me” because i always felt forced, which made me have a negative outlook on the religion. however, when i came to college, i had a lot more freedom, including when i want to go to church. with this freedom, i feel like i have a choice in how i want religion to play in my life, which i think helped me grow in my catholic journey. because i don't feel forced and because i now have the choice, i have more of a desire to explore my faith. integration two_froning froning 1 the trials of change “nothing endures but change.” ¹ during my college transition, i have been challenged in four pillars of my identity: faith, community relationships, personal expectations, and core values. each of these challenges has induced personal growth, and from these lessons, i can build a stronger personal identity. my faith in myself and god has been challenged by struggles that caused me strife and hardship, but each struggle has yielded a rea�rmation of my belief and deepened my connection to god. to be frank, college is harder than high school. there’s a fair portion of sleepless nights, unhappy results, and “why me” moments that arise, and in these moments it’s been easy to lose faith or feel (relatively) forsaken. college has challenged my discipline more than anything so far, in part because of the lack of a family support system (a constant presence since birth). however, these are the moments that our father below (as screwtape describes) seeks to tempt us away from god and belief in our abilities (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). it is in these moments that discipline is forged, and it is through hope in god that i have solidi�ed my discipline. by tapping into my connection with god, and calling on him for assistance in my strife, i can overcome these challenges and temptations (much to the dismay of screwtape). through hardship (every late night, every hour spent studying, every congested cough, every sore muscle) i feel my relationship with god deepening, to the point where i feel more connected to the world around me than at times before. my community relationships have been challenged by the nature of the situation: a new environment �lled with new people, but the university environment has allowed me to forge new relationships and support my communities. stepping foot on campus at �rst felt like stepping into a new world: one i have only ever been on the outside of. being thrust into this new world presented di�culties in my network (it’s been a bit since i have felt pressure to build a new support system), and the lack of family made me feel more isolated than i have before. as interesting as meeting people from all walks of life is, believe it or not, it has been a culture shock: just knowing about a culture, versus living with someone from that culture has been shaking to my sense of community. however, implementing faith into my community as christopher devron describes has allowed me to better realize that “di�erences of race, language and culture [are] not…obstacles to unity” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory” by christopher devron moreau fye week ten), but rather ways to more e�ectively understand our universal humanism: we’re in it together. this policy has let me connect with people more e�ectively because it installs a baseline assumption: whoever the other person is, they will support me. then, to transcend this assumption to the larger community, i can set aside my ego and “embrac[e] those [i] perceive as…enemy” (“thirteen ways of looking at a community” by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven), returning the policy, and support them in ¹ quote from heraclitus “the obscure”, an ancient greek philosopher https://www.thespiritlife.net/facets/81-warfare/warfare-publications/1883-chapter-8-the-screwtape-letters-cs-lewis https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ froning 2 their transition, thus creating a stronger community of mutual support. this community, one whose foundation is mutual support and respect, allows us all to thrive and �ourish, overcoming the barriers we as a people face. my expectations of life have been challenged by di�erent aspects of a new life at college, but these challenges help temper and amend my expectations to healthier ones. coming into notre dame, friends, family, and media had instilled a long list of expectations for me: it will be the best time of your life, perfect test scores mean a good job, etc. even though at the time i knew that the only expectations i should have are the ones i set, undoubtedly the people close to us in our lives can seep into these personal expectations. so, to some degree, i felt the pressure to “live up” to other people’s college experiences. however, hearing and discussing with other students the same pressures has shown me how ridiculous they are; to adopt those would be to sacri�ce my power. more speci�cally, one of my closest relationships showed me the damage of the simple question “it’s supposed to be the time of your life, right?” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine), as it consumed and hurt them to the point of mental collapse. similar to emery, i had to realize that the only expectation i should have is to be happy. while there is still progress to be made (naturally, it's hard to break down a false narrative echoed in my head so many times), i’m proud to see my growth in action: my stress is reduced, experiences feel more fun, and i get to focus on my passions more than my academics. my core values have been challenged by the introduction of many other peoples’ values, but these contrasts have reinforced and grown my core values. despite the �rmness i felt in my core beliefs (particularly the importance of truth and honest relationships), the variety and presence of so many drastically di�erent values naturally made me question my core values: is what i believed what i should believe? every new person comes with a di�erent life story, and with those experiences come new values and principles by which they guide their life. at times it can be overwhelming, and instill a false sense of imposter syndrome (“what is imposter syndrome? ted-talks” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine), making me question whether my current value set belongs with me at notre dame. however, it is for exactly that reason that i found a rea�rmation in my core values: my life story has been guided by the principles i’ve naturally found for myself over time. the purpose of going to notre dame is to foster these values into their best version and thus be true to myself. my experiences continually build onto my core values, exploring new areas and seeing di�erent perspectives. overall, my core values have strengthened through this belief, and my personal growth, in my mind, has been reframed to expand upon my core values, not change them. through the combination of the di�erent growths induced by challenges to my pillars of faith, community relationships, personal expectations, and core values, my identity has solidi�ed and led to a stronger sense of self-belonging and con�dence. my experiences and lessons from all the challenges i have and will continue to face allow me to grow as a person. as a result, i feel my sense of personal https://www.today.com/parents/freshman-s-video-shows-how-lonely-college-can-be-t117696 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo froning 3 identity strengthening, and i feel as if i’m “growing into” myself and discovering the life i want to live, which is something i’ve notoriously struggled with in the past (beyond the bare minimum “a good one”). i fully recognize this is an ongoing process, and one i’m happy to continue undertaking to cultivate myself. in the end, i’m thankful for the challenges i’ve faced so far because of the opportunities to grow they provide me, and i look forward to the challenges on the horizon. reflecting on new realizations reflecting on new realizations after some reflection and thought, i’ve come to realize the depth of the experience i’ve had here in just a few months at notre dame. i’ve been through ups and downs, highs and lows, and experienced such a wide variety of emotions in such a short amount of time. over this period of time, i’ve encountered a variety of experiences that i never really saw back at home. for the first time, i’ve been away from my friends and family long enough to really be my own person, but that comes with a lot of learning. while i still have a long way to go, i’m proud of what i’ve been able to achieve so far in my time here, and i’m thankful for both the positive and negative experiences, as they’ve shaped me into a more mature and thoughtful person. one of the first things i encountered in my time so far at notre dame is the ability to truly be free and be the sole decision-maker for myself. i did have a fair amount of freedom in high school, but whenever i made decisions, my family would know about it and usually would influence them in one way or another. now, i can do things on my own and the only reason for doing them is because i decided to. i no longer have to live up to expectations set by my parents or others, which i was so used to doing in high school. it reminds me of what julia hogan said in her article, where she wrote, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” julia hogan, moreau fye week 9) responding to this new realization of freedom wasn’t easy, as i spent many days wasting my time watching netflix and procrastinating doing my homework. but at the same time, it still felt good to be able to have that choice, to have that freedom regardless of the expectations of others around me. eventually, i was able to productively respond to this new freedom by beginning a routine that i tend to follow every day, where i allot time for myself to eat, relax, spend time with friends, exercise, and go to the library to study. ironically, i assume that this routine is exactly what my parents would expect of me, but it makes me feel more accomplished that i was able to produce it myself. finding this new sense of productivity from my encounter with my freedom as a college student is something that i hope to continue in my years here at notre dame. another encounter that i’ve had so far at notre dame is with new relationships. i’ve met a wide variety of people here who come from all sorts of different backgrounds and walks of life. all of my friends from back home grew up in our town for their entire lives, and while we still have many differences, a lot of our experiences have been shared experiences. coming to college, i’ve realized that’s not the case. it’s been so interesting to see people who come from all over the world and have different viewpoints and opinions from me because i think it’s healthy to have people in your life who don’t always think the same way that you do. it reminds me of a quote from father jenkins, where he said, “at a time of expanding diversity of people and moral opinions — when we need more skill and wisdom in engaging those with other views — we seem to be less skillful, less wise.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” father john jenkins, moreau fye week 10) encountering new people with different backgrounds and viewpoints has made me respond by realizing that i want people like that in my life. having close friends from all over the place who can tell me about their unique experiences and ideas is something that i feel will benefit me greatly, and i hope to continue to be close with friends who have diverse thoughts and opinions during my time here. at the same https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ time, this new influx of people that have come into my life has been nice, but also a little overwhelming. it’s been difficult to tell who i’m really close friends with, and who are more of the people that i won’t be involved with for too long. part of that comes from the dorm life here. i live in duncan hall, and i’ve gathered that building a brotherhood is especially important to us. i’ve never felt more welcomed by a group of people than the group of men we have in duncan. however, at first, it did seem like the relationships i had made in duncan were very forced. it reminds me of what parker j. palmer discussed when he wrote, “when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” parker j. palmer, moreau fye week 11) during welcome week, the upperclassmen in duncan spent a lot of time doing activities with us freshmen in order to try and create some immediate sense of community and brotherhood, but to me it felt very forced and it didn’t exactly work. as parker writes, you can’t treat a community as a product to be manufactured. however, as time has gone on here in duncan, i’ve begun to naturally develop close relationships with many of the people in my hall, which really just came from living in the same space for so long. it made me realize that relationships take time, and even if you think you know somebody well, it still takes a while to really know them. in the future, i plan to continue to respond to new relationships with the mindset that it’s going to take me a while to really become close with someone new. my final encounter that i’ve made so far at notre dame is the encounter with setbacks. from the beginning, i set myself some high expectations as far as my academic career has gone and it hasn’t really worked out for me. i’ve overslept through my alarm multiple times, i’ve gotten b’s on tests, i’ve missed some homework assignments. everytime these things have happened to me, i end up feeling miserable and defeated. i’ve responded to this by realizing that everyone goes through challenges and defeats like this, and it’s more about how i respond to these adversities more than anything else. as c.s. lewis said, “he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks; some of his special favorites have gone through longer and deeper troughs than anyone else.” (“the screwtape letters” c.s. lewis, moreau fye week 12) everyone has difficulties, but it’s those difficulties that develop you further as a person. since having these issues, i’ve learned to try and better myself from them by creating a plan. whenever i don’t achieve a goal of mine, whether that’s getting to class on time or getting the grade i want on a test, i make it a priority to write down three things that i can do next time that would put me in a better position to succeed. doing so has made me feel less stressed and down on myself after experiencing adversity, and the results have been successful so far. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28128/files/186057?module_item_id=102830 miller 1 professor pruitt fys 10102 29 april 2022 capstone integration: how do i pursue a life well-lived? mission statement: i strive to remain connected with myself, my family and friends, and my community at large, and i seek to develop wisdom through experience (“writing a personal mission statement activity” moreau fye week thirteen). throughout moreau classes this semester, i have been able to identify qualities and practices that i believe will allow me to lead a fulfilling life. my mission statement reflects the importance of building and maintaining healthy relationships with myself, other people, and my community and being open to new experiences to gain wisdom and maintain balance in my life. throughout the next three years at notre dame, i can put my mission into action by practicing self-reflection consistently, nurturing relationships with friends and family, playing an active role in my community by advocating for change, and listening to viewpoints that differ from mine. i understand that it will be difficult at times to stay true to my mission, especially as life gets busy, and sustaining balance in my life may not be possible due to different circumstances and responsibilities. still, i believe that my mission will be strengthened during my remaining time as a notre dame student since i will have numerous opportunities for reflection and community involvement, allowing me to achieve the balance that i cherish and the experience that is critical to accruing wisdom. practicing introspection is a valuable method to remain connected with myself and uphold the first tenet of my mission statement. asking questions such as those contained within the “pause for reflection activity” during week one (e.g., “what successes did you have? what strengths did you use to achieve them?”) will be critical to evaluating the experiences that i have at notre dame and beyond–whether those experiences occur within classes, extracurricular activities, or personal relationships–and recognizing how i have grown and changed (“pause for https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view miller 2 reflection” by the mcdonald center for wellbeing – moreau fye week one). for me, going forward, it will be especially important to make a conscious effort to acknowledge the positive aspects of my different life experiences. i have noticed that when a certain period in my life comes to an end (e.g., my freshman year), i dwell too much on the opportunities i missed, the people i wish i had met or grown closer to, etc. though it is beneficial to devote time to realizing regrets in order to avoid making those mistakes again in the future, it is equally important to see the positives by celebrating the challenges i successfully overcame, the relationships i developed, and the lessons i learned about myself. i know that i can reap many benefits from engaging in self-reflection consistently throughout my life, as “people who possess greater insight — an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). introspection will enable me to remain in touch with my core values and appreciate my personal growth, which is necessary to maintain a strong sense of self-esteem and purpose in the different situations i will encounter. practicing self-reflection will also allow me to cultivate a stronger sense of gratitude for myself, my abilities, and the various gifts in my life. beyond enabling me to evaluate my values, recognize how i have changed, and assess opportunities to improve myself, introspection and the connection it will allow me to maintain with myself will also influence my career journey. essentially, by honestly acknowledging my talents, passions, and goals, i can pursue a path to a fulfilling professional life: “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). the modules for this semester’s moreau seminars have already enabled me to consider my essential values, skills, interest in current local and societal issues, and most gratifying life experiences. for example, during week four, i identified the continuous seeking of knowledge, the desire to help others, a flexible schedule, and collaboration as some of the features that i would like my future career to include (“career development reflection activity” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four), and during week five, conversation with my mom showed me that i feel most “in the zone” when i am working through a challenging math problem or trying to understand a complex topic https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 miller 3 in science classes (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five)–i thus recognized that i thrive off of intellectual stimulation and am looking for a career that often presents changes and new challenges. though i have narrowed down the career options i am most eager to pursue as either a career in medicine or a career in academia and scientific research, i am still in the process of debating which career path best suits me, and i know that this ongoing reflection will benefit from continuous analysis of my natural skills, topics that excite me, and ways in which i can connect my interests to serving other people. my mission statement also expresses my desire to remain connected to a strong support system, which is my family and close friends. i can work to strengthen and expand this support system in different ways while at notre dame by always remaining open to new people and allowing myself to be vulnerable to other people. i consider myself a good listener to other people and their stories, but i want to cultivate the skill of sharing my own stories and, in turn, allow people to truly get to know me. to do so, i know i have to let go of some of the embarrassment i feel when i allow myself to be vulnerable, and i must not avoid opening up out of a desire to appear perfect and “put together,” as “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i also want to work on cultivating the spirit of accompaniment that will enable me to support and learn from the people that i encounter at nd and after graduation. professor steve reifenberg describes the meaning of accompaniment as wholly immersing ourselves in another person’s life and letting them become immersed in ours: “in the accompaniment model, we’re in this together; we’re implicated as partners in the mix, sharing in the complexity and chaos of each other’s lives” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i seek to accompany my family and friends by constantly being open to listening to them, whether it be about the best parts of their day or their current struggles. in response, i want to give good advice and authentically share the details of my own life. i hope to exemplify what accompaniment means by always being present with other people, such as my family members, nd friends, and home friends, so that they know i am there for them in their best and worst moments as a source of love and support. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit file:///c:/users/21_bm/downloads/_tattoos%20on%20the%20heart_%20-%20chapter%208_%20jurisdiction%20(1)%20(2).pdf https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit miller 4 playing an active role in my school and home community will also be a primary focus for me during the next three years. i aim to uphold this portion of my mission statement by getting involved in the clubs that pertain to issues that interest me and in different volunteer opportunities in south bend. this year, i have already begun to discover some of these activities and have been able to go into downtown south bend to volunteer on different occasions this semester. i want to further this involvement and remember that i cannot be content with always living in the “notre dame bubble”—i want to educate myself on the issues facing the south bend community as well as different communities in our country and other parts of the world. for example, i recognize the importance of learning about how american institutions perpetuate racism and benefit white people: “the distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the us today if one ignores group power relations” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). i aim to embrace the discomfort that i may feel having conversations about topics such as racism in america and learn how i can better support black students and members of my hometown community by reading up on current race relations and expanding my circle to include people of different backgrounds, as “racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). in my hometown, i have seen members of my community express hateful language about and towards people of color; i know it is not enough to work on eliminating my own racist tendencies and educating myself about racism–i must also be unafraid to speak out when i see other people being overtly racist or voicing microaggressions. as father hesburgh advocated during his life, “it’s your country, it’s your problem” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). though my life situation is not harmed by, and is often benefitted by, current political and economic structures in the us, i cannot ignore the minority groups that are oppressed and even put in danger by this structural violence. while at notre dame, i aim to learn more about how people of color are marginalized within the us–a topic i have begun to explore through anthropology classes and want to continue to study in other courses–and participate in volunteer work that specifically seeks to support people of color in south bend, an activity i have started by volunteering weekly at aids https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 miller 5 assist, which works to improve the lives of hiv-positive people, a population group primarily comprised of black and hispanic individuals. i want to continue my involvement in these activities and, in turn, create a positive impact on my community. i believe that wisdom is gained through experience, and i want to embrace different experiences at notre dame and throughout my life. to do so, i must appreciate all that there is to celebrate in the present moment, a practice encouraged by memento mori (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). though reflecting too heavily on death can be morbid, having a healthy awareness that my life is finite motivates me to experience as much of the world and its people as i can. there is a lesson that i can learn from every person i interact with and place i go; thus, i believe that it is crucial to actively seek out people who think differently from me. as a result, i will be able to avoid creating echo chambers in my life and better understand a broader range of human experience, evaluating how i can find middle ground with people of different backgrounds and viewpoints, a goal i cannot accomplish if i only aim to interact with like-minded people: “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). taking in new experiences–motivated by an awareness that it is necessary to be present in the moment and embrace unfamiliar situations and diverse groups–will help me to work towards becoming a wise person who is capable of making the most out of opportunities and empathizing with many different types of people. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s toby bradshaw professor taylor moreau first-year experience 30 november 2021 what have i encountered and how will i respond? in my time so far at notre dame, i have questioned far more things about my life than ever before. one might think that i should have done this before college to help inform my college choice. although i am starting to feel more comfortable at notre dame now, i have asked some important questions about my life, what i have accomplished, my choices, and who i want to be someday. i ask the first question primarily because of self-doubt. being constantly surrounded by so many overachievers and go-getters, i feel like i am out of my league, not even able to compete with my new peers. furthermore, even in my social life, i feel like i am also on the outside. i feel like almost everyone has already formed a friend group that they consistently hang out with. it is not like i feel like i have no friends, i have plenty of friends and people who like me. however, i feel like i do not have a consistent group of friends like in high school. this has led to me feeling very out of place, like an impostor among my peers. i always feel like i should be doing more; seeing more people, studying more, and working out more because of the way i see others and the expectations i put on myself. however, as julia hogan said, “ i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau first year experience week nine). taking some time over break to unwind and think about who i wanted to be was very freeing and helped me come to a better relationship with myself and be happier so far back at notre dame. furthermore, taking the time to do some self-work helped me make friends by realizing that i needed to be myself more, rather than pretending to be someone so i could get into a friend group. and, as parker j. palmer said, “ the work of becoming receptive is quite unlike the external work of building communal structures or gathering endlessly to “share” and “solve problems”: receptivity involves inner work. community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart.” (“thirteen ways of looking at a community” by parker j. palmer moreau first year experience week eleven). this quote encapsulates how i feel about opening up more to others, rather than how i interpreted it before: that i needed to try harder to go out more and be with others more. now, i feel like i do not have to hang out with people every second of every day and it is ok to get b’s or even c’s. this realization has also helped me with my career discernment as i try to understand what i want to do with my life. i am still very unsure but i feel more confident to be myself and follow my own path as well as god’s path. spending more time with my family over break gave me a better appreciation of the gifts i have been given by god. with that, i realized that i need to put more effort into deepening my relationship with god, just as i need to deepen my relationship with my friends at notre dame. as fr. james b. king said, “striving for completeness means spending one’s life as a citizen of this world imitating the person of christ as the gateway to citizenship in heaven. on this bedrock principle, all faith and thus all human hope rests.” ( “hope holy cross and cristian education ” by fr. james b. king moreau first year experience week twelve). this means that i need to place more faith and hope in god to guide my path for the future. i think that this will be more difficult for me than it should be. in recent years i have become less and less religious and my faith has decreased in importance, which is somewhat ironic because i am attending a prestigious catholic school. it is not really something that i am proud of and i need to start making a better attempt to deepen my faith. i can make some simple steps like attending mass more regularly but the bulk of the work rests on my shoulders. furthermore, one thing that has become much less black and white for me in the past is racism and other related social issues. in the past, since i was surrounded by so many like-minded individuals who all agreed with me that racism was bad, i feel like i did not experience true racism or even really realize that it existed. because of this, i did not do as much research into the topic. however, by being at notre dame and learning more about institutional racism and critical race theory, i have come to a greater understanding of the world i live in and my own country’s terrible flaws. as fr. john jenkins said, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future.” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau first year experience week ten), i believe that i need to do what i can to combat racism where i find it to help others and our nation. i must use what privilege i have to begin to make things better. this may even be the path in which god leads me for my career. i am certainly open to it. ultimately, my thanksgiving break and the short time leading up to it have had the greatest impact on my college experience so far. the time i took to reflect has given me a much clearer picture of my future and who i am as a person as well as a greater understanding of my world’s problems. i also feel so much less burnt out and empowered to take on the challenges of my future, whatever it may be. week one assignment jake harris fys 10101-59 megan leis 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? the stories we tell are essential to our human experience. stories inspire and encourage us, and they give us the ability to put our own lives in perspective and to reflect. to that end, the question that stood out to me most was “in what ways do stories shape my journey?” even in the last few days, as i began to meet people, i’ve been enthralled by the stories i’ve heard from peers, professors, and staff at the university. there’s the security member who photographed rfk, the professor who learned to disassemble a rifle in sierra leone, and the myriad experiences and stories brought to the fore by the class of 2025. different places, backgrounds, cultures—all of us drawn to the nexus that is notre dame. it’s not even been a week and i have learned and become aware of so much more. and before that, stories from my mentors, friends, and family guided me to care about others, to be ambitious, to do good. in short, stories are what makes us, us. they’re the soul of the human experience. and i’m incredibly excited to see how the stories i’ll both hear and become a part of add to my own personal experiences. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. question: what pushes a person to find themselves worthy of belonging? unworthy of it? quote: "well, i have a vulnerability issue. and i know that vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love.” i found the dichotomy of vulnerability posed by dr. brown to be compelling: “the core of shame and fear [...] the birthplace of joy [...] of love.” dr. brown’s assertion that vulnerability can be the essence of such vividly disparate emotions poses an interesting perspective on self-worth. it shows that vulnerability can be rewarding, if one has the courage to let go of their inhibitions and open up to those around them. the quote itself also shows dr. brown’s own vulnerability, as this omission itself shows how she has grown from someone who has tried to perfectly order the behavior she studies. comment: i found dr. brown’s tedx talk to be fascinating, with a potent message to viewers: those who want connections must give a little of themselves to others, and that’s hard. dr. brown’s own vulnerability showed clearly through the talk, as she clearly and unabashedly shared her own journey towards understanding shame. i thoroughly enjoyed the talk, and i plan to take the lessons from the video into my own life. i’ve been a relatively private person in my life so far, but as i form deeper with those around me i hope to push out of my comfort zone into one where i can see and be seen by others more fully. prof. pruitt moreau fye 24 april 2022 how i will make the most of my life. before starting my first year here at the university of notre dame, i had put off thinking about how i would go about pursuing a well-lived life. i knew i had to eventually plan for my future but at the time, i had room to procrastinate about these sorts of things. now that i am on the brink of finishing my first year of college, it is time i started thinking about what ways are best to further my own personal development. originally, i was not a fan of the moreau firstyear experience course, but i now realize that it helps to strengthen the moral foundations i was raised on and gives me an idea of how to actually carry out what forms these foundations in my life. i specifically had to think about my future in relation to this when i stopped and sat down to write my personal mission statement, as it was something that i could not just make up some random words and submit a halfhearted statement. even though my answer was serious, and i put a lot of thought into it, it still needs to be refined so that i have a better understanding of what leads to a fulfilling life. i touched upon a few ideas, such as serving and respecting others, acting in wisdom, and responding to suffering. these are all good to master, yet i felt there was so much from the moreau first-year experience that could also be included. fully forming a solid idea on these topics and how to execute them is crucial. i hope to keep forming and shaping the skills i need to during the final three years i have here at this university. looking back at what i had written for the mission statement, i saw that although what was stated was good, it focused primarily on how i planned to help others in my future endeavors. being other-centered is very important, but to truly get to the stage of putting others first there has to be a serious look at the self. the first step in this self-examination is to slow down and take the time to do so, as pico iyer’s ted talk and aria swarr’s “five minutes” advised us to do. it is easy for us to get distracted by our busy lives but slowing down is a good start. as i should have learned sooner, it is also key to recognize that there is a limited amount of time to chase this lifestyle. this is where ideas such as “memento mori” come into play (ruth graham, ny times article). from there, it would do me good to draw on the experiences and examples of others to help myself, as was done through the “domer dozen” and the video on father hesburgh. i am not the only one trying to walk this path, and it is reassuring to know that others have gone before me and succeeded in this pursuit of this kind of life. part of it is making an effort on my part to actively explore and discern. it is not about waiting for things to happen. starting with exploration, a career is definitely a way to do so (meruelo family center for career development activities). of course, having a good career does not lead to fulfillment, but it is a good way to discover and fulfill what i wrote in my mission statement. when talking about discernment, my remaining years will be full of it. helped along by the moreau discernment activities (week 5), discerning is a slow process that pays off in the end. even past the next three years, discerning a fulfilling life will take a lifetime. through discernment, then i will be able to grow in wisdom in making the right decisions. i will be able to effectively avoid things like echo chambers (week 11), which are things that would hinder my journey to discovering myself. it would also aid in helping me act with more courage because i would know (through discernment) who and what to stand for just like marcus cole’s article on george floyd. all in all, self-reflection and self-awareness are essential when beginning a life that is contented. now that we have covered the aspects i should master when it comes to myself, now is the time to continue building on the other-centered messages found in my self-reflection. i mentioned serving and respecting others, acting in wisdom, and responding to suffering, but these stem from embracing humanity and its faults. notre dame’s “spirit of inclusion” touched on this: “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god.” my time here at notre dame has taught me to respect and love people from all different backgrounds. i should not only do this because it is the right thing to do, but also because it is what god calls me to do. once humanity is embraced, then can we truly respond to suffering and help others from the heart. it will be with pure intentions that we help those on the margins, as steve reifenberg did when he traveled to south america to help the communities there (week 9). then, i can go about forming meaningful relationships, as fr. gregory boyle did through homeboy industries (week 7). when writing my personal mission statement, my main focus was on helping others. what i did not realize at the time was that i needed to focus on developing myself as much as i would focus on helping the marginalized. if i had to rewrite what i had already put down, i would make the promise to strengthen my own personal foundations alongside striving to make the world better. in my next three years what i have learned and reinforced here will sure to help me not only during these years but also in my future pursuits. a secure future does not necessarily mean a life worthy of being proud of, and i hope to be able to secure the latter using what i have learned here. bibliography (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) (“domer dozen” by notre dame – moreau fye week two) (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by the new york times – moreau fye week three) (“career development reflection” by notre dame – moreau week four) (“discernment conversation activity” by notre dame – moreau week five) (“five minutes” by aria swarr, grotto – moreau week six) (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8” by fr. gregory boyle – moreau week 7) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau week 9) (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame – moreau week 10 (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by notre dame – moreau week 11 (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, notre dame – moreau week 12 (“notre dame mission” by notre dame – moreau week 13 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145578 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145669 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ moreau integration 2 murphy 1 professor oswald moreau integration paper 2 28 november 2021 living authentically and compassionately despite the brief period of time i’ve lived at notre dame, i can confidently say that it has been a transformative experience in terms of personal development and growth. while the choice to come to notre dame was not easily made, i haven’t once regretted the decision. it’s no easy task, leaving behind the comforts of home: my family, friends, and the simple pleasures of a smaller hometown. however, the close-knit community cultivated by the students of notre dame allowed for an easier transition that has allowed me to flourish both academically and socially. however, such a transition was not without hardship; grappling with my relatively more diverse identity at notre dame is an ongoing process, one with room for growth. one of the most notable challenges i’ve faced at the university is achieving a balance among academics, extracurriculars, mental and physical wellbeing, and my social life, particularly in the face of the high standards i’ve always set for myself. however, i’ve found more comfort in accepting my imperfection. julie hogan appropriately articulated my newfound mindset in her discussion on personal expectations, stating, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julie hogan, moreau week 9). appreciating my best efforts for what they are has allowed me to cultivate greater self-respect and patience. however, my academic performance has often come at the cost of jeopardizing my physical and mental health. i’ve managed to achieve decent marks, yet it often comes at the expense of a mere five or six hours of sleep a night. and, by extension, the lack of sleep https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau murphy 2 promotes feelings of stress, anxiety, and self-doubt. next semester, i hope to craft a schedule that gives me more time to prioritize fitness and sleep in order to care for my mental and physical well-being. the mentality of finding comfort with “doing my best” must extend to all aspects of my life for a more cohesive, fulfilling college experience. one pleasant surprise in terms of my university experiences has been the general response to my standing with faith, as i currently identify as agnostic–not particularly common at a catholic university. coming to notre dame, i expected to feel ostracized on the basis of my religious beliefs from time to time. in fact, i’ve found quite the opposite. upon learning of my religious status, most students tend to inquire further–what factors led me to believe what i do, what my exposure to various faiths has been, etc. nearly each individual has exemplified one of the core tenets discussed by father jenkins in regard to faith: compassion. as fr. jenkins stated in his 2012 wesley theological seminary address, “to stand apart, proclaim my position, and refuse to talk except to judge does not reduce hatred or promote love.” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by father jenkins, moreau week 10). rather than showing me judgment, almost everyone has been incredibly welcoming and open to discussion, in addition to teaching me more about catholic faith. i hope to bring this same mindset into the spring semester to learn more about catholicism and theology as a whole, particularly within my fundamentals of theology class with other non-christian students. one aspect of the student body that caught me relatively off guard was the variation in regards to social acceptance. as a bisexual student at a catholic institution, i expected to encounter homophobia among some of the more conservative, religious students, yet i didn’t anticipate any would vocalize such beliefs so publicly. that is, until i read the article “no man can serve two masters” published in the irish rover by a fellow student back in october. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ murphy 3 while the article was more harmful to catholic lgbt students, it was incredibly difficult to hear such insensitive and discriminatory language cloaked behind the veil of “catholic character”, particularly as someone who is openly and actively trying to learn more about catholicism and appreciate its various dimensions. once the article was published, however, i saw such an incredible emergence in support from students of all backgrounds, lgbt and allies alike. it was so inspiring and reaffirming to be able to have open discussions with these students about the article and lgbt culture at notre dame itself. it was a remarkable statement in regards to social progression at the university, particularly in terms of community building, as “community begins not externally but in the recesses of the human heart. long before community can be manifested in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness–a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and psyches are riddled.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, moreau week 11). this quote from parker palmer was a reminder that we as students can overcome hatred and intolerance through empathy, compassion, and unity as a community. my experience with the varying responses to the irish rover article inspired me to apply for a position with the grc fire starters, as i hope to become more involved with events on campus so that students from all walks of life feel comfortable, safe, and cherished on campus. whether it's with the grc or otherwise, i hope to work on advocacy initiatives across campus to generate lasting social change. overall, i’ve found joy in being here at notre dame. however, such joy hasn’t always been easily obtainable. there have been days where i’ve struggled more, particularly in terms of maintaining healthy relationships with my friends and family despite the distance and succeeding in my classes. as described by c.s. lewis, “as long as he lives on earth, periods of emotional http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ murphy 4 and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty [...] they are merely a natural phenomenon.” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis, moreau week 12). experiencing bad days is something that everyone goes through and is a natural part of life. living through the bad allows us to have gratitude for the good. i’ve found that by establishing routines and finding activities that bring me joy, i can often keep the bad days at bay. whether it's going for a walk along the lakes or playing piano in the chapel, finding time for myself where i can reflect and relax has been incredibly beneficial for me. however, not everyone i know has been fortunate enough to find healthy coping mechanisms on harder days. despite the brevity of my experiences at notre dame, i’ve witnessed many of my friends face challenging days in regard to mental health. this, combined with my interest in mental health, motivated me to join the active minds club here at notre dame, in addition to the active minds advocacy committee. i’ve been fortunate enough to work on various mental health awareness initiatives at the university as a result. next semester, i hope to implement these various initiatives (i.e. mental health syllabus statement, faculty training, etc.) so that students and faculty alike can better approach the subject of mental health and destigmatize conversation surrounding it. thus, as a result of my experiences with mental health, i’ve become more involved on campus and have found methods of treating my own sources of mental discomfort which i hope to expand upon in the spring. embracing my authentic self on campus and having the courage to express myself to my peers has been an engaging and inspiring experience. i’ve built connections with people i never anticipated meeting, and i’ve become more familiar with what brings me joy and how to handle that which does not. i’ve come to recognize some of the issues that are increasingly prevalent throughout campus, particularly in regards to the social climate, and through such recognition i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192826?module_item_id=109705 murphy 5 have come to know an incredibly supporting, loving, and compassionate community. while my journey at notre dame has only just begun, the future appears full of opportunities for personal growth as my most authentic and compassionate self. integration 2 learning to deal with change integration two imposter syndrome has been something i have encountered at notre dame. in week nine in moreau, we learned all about imposter syndrome, expectations and how to deal with them. the way i view imposter syndrome is to have a lack of faith in your own abilities. it is often to feel that you don’t belong in a place. this can obviously be a large struggle for students in notre dame because we are among some of the brightest students in america. being here can feel like everyone is so much smarter than yourself and that i must have gotten into this wonderful school by some sort of mistake. through different class discussions, it soon became obvious that those of us struggling with imposter syndrome were not alone. many people here feel overwhelmed by the smartness of those around us. unfortunately, imposter syndrome, i have found, can actually inhibit academic performance. the second you start to believe that you don’t belong here, the motivation starts to leave. i found it to be so helpful to remind myself that i am enough to be here. i soon discovered that by comparing myself to other people, i was making things much worse for myself. i think the best policy is just to compare yourself to yourself only and not to focus on the progress of our friends and classmates. i came to realize that many people had external factors that were pressuring them to be the best and to get top grades, like parents for example. the grotto article taught me “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others”, (the grotto article by julia hoganmoreau fye week 9). this quote doesn’t only relate to our performance in the classroom, but is also good advice for our life in college. we should set our own personal expectations for ourselves and not waste any time worrying about living up to the expectations of others. this is a big thing that i have learned in college. when i first got here from ireland, there were many things i had to adjust to compared to some of the american students. rather than panic that other people seemed to be adjusting more seamlessly than me, i just told myself to take it day by day and go at my own pace. i have found this to be the most beneficial thing that i could have done because it means that i'm not constantly stressed about keeping up with others. i have just set my own realistic expectations for myself. i am also a strong believer that the motivation to work hard and to excel, has to come from within, and not external pressure. it would be impossible to meet everybody’s individual expectations. i have encountered a new world of people with polar opposite beliefs. i always knew before coming to america that this country was much bigger than my own so people were bound to have different opinions on topics. my mam had warned me before leaving for school to watch what i said and to think before i speak because i wouldn't want to offend people. she told me that my experience here would be much different from my life in ireland. ireland is such a small country with little to no power, so it is hard for our country to be divided by political beliefs. things are much different here, and people are very passionate about what and who they believe in. this sort of scared me at first. when people would make politically charged comments, i would have absolutely no idea what to respond. over the last few months i have learned that we all just need to learn to respect the opinions of others. in a country with over three hundred million people, agreeing on one idea would be impossible! but so as to keep order and love between people, we just have to make efforts to understand each other and why people might have reasons to believe certain things. i loved this quote from week ten, “love is the greatest commandmentand hatred is at the heart of the greatest sin. hatred is the great destroyerthe great divider” (commencement speech by fr. john jenkinsmoreau fye week 10). it is just of utmost importance to hold love for one another instead of jumping to conclusions as soon as someone has a different opinion to us. it takes all sorts to make the world go round, and what a boring place the world would be if we all thought the same thing! to tackle this problem of differences dividing us, i have decided that i will personally take the time to educate myself to try to better understand other people’s point of view. since coming to notre dame, i have met many wonderful people of different cultures and races. america is a melting pot of culture compared to ireland. i have been so lucky over the past three months to meet people from every corner of the world and to meet people of different races and cultures. i have come to realize that we have so much to learn from those different to us. in one of my classes we had to do a cross-cultural interview, and i interviewed a girl in my dorm who was adopted from china. i learned so much in this experience alone, about how we all have grown up so differently. actually this interview made me realize that we never really know what’s going on behind closed doors. and how dare we ever judge people off the color of their skin or where they come from? unfortunately, i believe that racism can still be an issue in notre dame as we heard testimonials from students who had encountered discrimination in week eleven. they were heartbreaking. we saw the quote “race and inequality matterbut they are not fixed” (diversity matters video by prof. agustin fuentesmoreau fye week 11 ), and i have never known this to be more true. the very second we think that inequality is here to stay, is the moment it will be here to stay. we need to collectively believe that there is something each of us can do to eradicate inequality throughout the world today. i think that gaining exposure to the world and having different life experiences will help us all to reduce bias and inequality. we also have to call people out for their wrongdoings. we will encounter difficulties with faith in college. in week twelve, we read the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis. the readings were about what satan thought about god and humans and what his own goals were. “his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks” (the screwtape letters by c.s lewis – moreau fye week 12), this is what satan thinks of god, that he just wants possession of us all. these letters, in my opinion, are just a reminder to keep a strong faith in whatever we believe in while we’re here at school. if we ever feel like straying from what we believe in, these letters are a reminder to us of what the devil thinks of us. although this is a primarily catholic school, there is room for all beliefs and it’s so important to keep a strong faith. i think it will help us get through the good and bad times at college. i think the grotto is a great place to go for guidance, whether it be before exams, or just in general. i plan to start going to mass in bp more to strengthen my faith. moreau integration 1 integration 1 assignment moreau first year experience 10/15/21 my beliefs can lead to change and passion throughout my life, i have continuously seeked to build my beliefs through developing a deeper understanding of myself and others. when i was young, i always looked up to my parents and followed their footsteps in order to shape my own mannerisms as well as use their influence to develop my own beliefs. however, as i have experienced many different situations, i have not only been able to build upon the foundation that my parents set for me, but also develop new beliefs and ideas that have shaped me into the unique person that i am today. whether the experience involved serving with others, a special family tradition, or an experience with friends, i have come to know that they have not only guided my belief system, but also have taught me lessons that i will use for the rest of my life. through developing concrete root beliefs, it has provided a compass for me in determining my path that i plan on taking in life and also has allowed me to discern the unique and incredible plan that god has for me. my root beliefs are that first, i believe that i forge life giving relationships by being vulnerable and honest with myself and therefore expressing my genuine self to others. i believe that i can pursue truth by learning from experiences with others and being open to the diversity that exists in the world. finally, i believe that i am made to create a community of kinship through my actions.through experience and learning from situations that i have encountered in my life, i have been able to further strengthen my root beliefs and also build upon the foundation that my root beliefs have built for me. i walked out of the car juggling my golf clubs, water bottle, and papers for my first golf practice. i was a sophomore in high school and i had never played golf before and i did not know anyone on the team. however i wanted to try something new since it was out of my comfort zone. when i began to practice with the team, i watched in admiration of my teammates hitting the ball extremely far, where i was hitting the ball less than ten yards. however, this encouraged me to practice more and set a goal to be an influential contributor to the team. i not only was able to achieve this goal in eventually becoming a top scorer on the team, but i was also able to gain incredible relationships that i will cherish forever. as the only person who had never played golf before, i was in a very vulnerable position and relied on my coaches and teammates for guidance. this allowed me to develop connections with my teammates that i would have never been able to create without the power of vulnerability. in brene brown’s ted talk about vulnerability she states, ““in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). through seeking assistance and being open to my teammates and coaches advice, i was able to make myself “seen” in a way by being vulnerable which therefore helped me create life giving relationships. this can also relate directly to the via character study that was discussed in class (via character study -via institute of charactermoreau fye week 2). before i tried golf, i was very hesitant to try something new due to the fear of the unknown and not having previous experience. however, after trying something new, i was able to develop humility and create a deeper appreciation for vulnerability, which helped further my character. i was able to expose myself to something that i was not exemplary at in the beginning, however through hard work, determination, and with the help of my team, i was able to improve. this can also be directly correlated to the development of life-giving relationships which was discussed in an article that was discussed in class which addresses the importance of recognizing toxic relationships (“five signs you're in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week 4). i have learned that it is crucial to recognize the distinction of unhealthy and healthy relationships. i have come to know that i have the responsibility to further my healthy relationships and also cultivate friendships that are “life giving” therefore, this experience truly helped strengthen my belief that the most effective way in creating life giving relationships is through vulnerability. throughout my life, i have constantly longed to seek for the truth in every situation that i experience. however, i have come to know that one of the most important ways in pursuing the truth is through my faith and recognizing god within each person i encounter. this has played a major role in my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ faith in which through experiences with other human beings, i have been able to apply the ideal that every person is made in the “image and likeness of god”. through recognizing the validity and truth in this belief, i have been called to unite with those who may be struggling and help them further continue their journey that god has provided for them, since each of us are children of god. this was further reinforced in an article written by professor david fagerberg, in which he discusses the light that faith can bring to one’s life. in the article he states, “ everything is sacrament, everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary, no one is ordinary, god can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of god, every joy and sorrow can become a prayer” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). this is truly powerful to me because it shows that faith can guide me to understand and see the truth in the belief that god is present in every person i encounter and every situation. this also shows that through faith i have the ability to recognize the uniqueness of each person. similarly, this was discussed further in a ted talk by chimamanda ngozi adichie in which she stresses the importance of developing a well rounded perspective about another person, rather than using one characteristic as a major factor of judgement. in her discussion she states, “power is not only the ability to tell the story of a person, but to make it the definitive story of the person” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week 7). this idea further emphasizes the importance of recognizing and embracing the diversity of stories and the uniqueness that each human being on earth possesses. this truly inspired me to seek and appreciate the different qualities that others possess and further understand that one characteristic does not define a person. therefore, i am able to move closer to discovering the truth through strengthening my faith and using my faith to recognize the beautiful uniqueness that is within each person on earth. i have come to know that through strengthening my character, i am better able to give back and serve with others in creating a community of kinship. one major instance that truly provided a foundation for this belief was during one of the many school service trips i had at a homeless shelter in kensington, philadelphia. as we drove through kensington, i was astounded by the sea of tents that lined the streets and the number of people who lived on the streets. when it came time to prepare and serve dinner, there https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story were lines of people waiting outside for a warm meal that they were long awaiting. each time someone would come to the table, i would make it a point to greet them. however, one person stuck out in the crowd. i noticed an older asian woman who was waiting for her meal and appeared ill at ease. when she reached the serving table, i greeted her with a warm smile and she went from looking lonely to joyful. at that moment, i was overcome with this sense of joy and peace that my simple act could change her sense of belonging. this experience encouraged me to complete not only large scale acts of service, but also small acts of kindness throughout every aspect of my life. i have come to know that i have the responsibility to establish kinship and unity in my community, in order to establish a world where every person receives an equal chance to thrive. this can be applied to the idea of identifying influences that was discussed in week 6 of moreau fye. i have realized that my perspectives have been shaped by a compilation of influences which have shaped my belief system. the experience at sarnelli shaped my understanding of my purpose and therefore has provided a compass for me throughout my life. i have been able to bring this lesson as a student at notre dame, in which i have the ability to contribute to the unity that this university continues to enhance and i therefore should make a positive impact on the community. in carla harris’ laetare medalist address, she states, “your power lies not in who you are, but in whose you are” (2021 laetare medalist address by carla harrismoreau fye week 5). this shows me that my force for good, ultimately stems from god and i should therefore use my faith as a compass in creating unity in the world. i hope to continue this as a student at notre dame and cultivate unity in the notre dame community and also develop a deep appreciation for the strong bonds that the notre dame community holds. therefore, through recognizing my purpose through faith, i have the ability to enact change and further my root belief in creating a community of kinship. my root beliefs are continuously strengthened through different experiences that have truly taught me important lessons that i will use for the rest of my life. although i have many beliefs, my core beliefs involve creating life giving relationships, the pursuit of truth through faith, and my purpose in creating a community of kinship. i plan on continuing to strengthen these beliefs as a notre dame student and i hope that my experience in the notre dame community will help me develop even more root https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 beliefs. therefore, i aspire to use these root beliefs as a compass in determining my path for the future and also contributing to furthering goodness throughout the world. matteo pietro pecchio moreau first year experience november 26, 2021 what have i encountered and how will i respond? table of contents introduction .......................................................................................................................... 2 what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clearance? .................................. 2 what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? ......................................................................................................................... 3 what has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? ..................... 4 what are some of the most important questions i have asked this semester? ......................... 5 introduction this is the second integration essay for moreau. this means that the first semester of my notre dame experience is reaching its end. during this semester i can say that i have been through fantastic moments, where school was going great and where i was able to keep in almost perfect balance the famous triangle of university (in the picture). however, there were times, mainly toward the end of the semester, where my motivation wasn’t at his peak, and this impacted mainly my grades and my extracurricular activities. overall, i can say that i am pretty happy about this semester went, and i hope to finish it well with my finals. in this essay, i will respond to four main questions that can summarize my growth here in notre dame, and i hope i will be able to capture all the details of this growth. what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clearance? “i’ve run a game on everybody, and they are going to find me out” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week 9). i want to start with this quote, by elizabeth cox. this quote explains the feeling that a lot of people have felt here in notre dame, which is part of a syndrome called “imposter syndrome”. when experiencing this syndrome, you feel like the others are much better than you, and that you don’t deserve to be in the same environment. i wanted to start with this because this is one of the first feeling i have felt when i arrived. i saw all the sophomores and juniors handling their work easily while i was struggling to keep up with just a few papers and some readings. i had to drop a class, as i was not performing well, and that only increased this feeling i had. however, with time and after some good grades, i realized that a lot of freshmen were in my same position, struggling, and “fighting” with all their resources to do well. i adapted to this hard-working environment, and now i can clearly say that i am not worse than anyone else on campus (except for some geniuses, but they are an exception). while this statement might sound arrogant, i think that believing it was a game changer for me. understanding that with hard work, we can all get as, do extracurricular, and even apply for jobs, gave me an incentive. and even in times where i was feeling down, i could always get some help from the exceptional people here at nd. therefore, in one sentence, i can now say that no one here is an imposter, and that if you are here, it means that you have the skills to be here and do well, you just need to believe it. what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? the words black and white in the heading are somewhat ironic, as this paragraph will talk about race. first of all, i have to admit that my growth in this field was possible because of two protagonists: my moreau class and my roommate. one might be what is not clear to me about races, as racism is clearly a bad thing and there can’t be an argument about it. well, let me introduce the quote, and then let me explain. the quote i decided to include for this paragraph is “the story of race has many voices; understanding them begins with listening” (“with voices true” – moreau fye week 11). why this quote? very simple, because listening is one of the things i promised to myself to do here in notre dame. i was lucky enough to have a black person as a roommate, which made the listening “job” much easier, as i would just need to ask questions, which he was happy to answer. therefore, if i listened, why is racism now more complicated to me than before. the reason is that before i just took it as a fact, learnt the very basics, and that was it. however, this semester i was able to listen to a person that has experienced the race issue his whole life, and this made me realize how little i knew about the matter. how there are a lot of details that an average white guy like me never understood. this made the whole race issue a lot more complex to me. however, now i can say that when i listen about these issues, i am a little better at understanding the bigger picture, and this is what makes it complicated. what has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? “a piece is more beautiful for having been broken” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by kirsten helgeson – moreau fye week 10). i decided to take this quote because it reminds me of vulnerability. vulnerability is something that increased in importance to me in the last few months as i understood that is crucial to be open about myself. this way it is much easier to create meaningful relationships and to ask for help when needed. i believe i am not overstating when i say that vulnerability can be crucial for a college student like me, who lives far from home and who has left all of his closest friends to come here. the reason why i say that vulnerability has grown in importance is that before coming here, i didn’t even know what vulnerability was and i always played the part of the tough guy, who is always there for people but rarely ask for any help. what are some of the most important questions i have asked this semester? to conclude, i am going to explain what the most important questions are i have faced this semester. i want to start with this quote about education, which is in fact my first question: what goals do i want to achieve from my experience here in notre dame. the quote goes like this: “[education] is the art of helping young people to completeness” (“holy cross and christian education” – moreau fye week 12). i believe that my completeness will be reached, at least in terms of a college experience, when i will have understood what i satisfies me, in terms of relationships, studies and career. right now, i believe i have all the answers to these three different fields, being: honest relationships built on trust, finance and french (it’s weird how i am leaving out economics, my major), and a career in financial services (probably starting in investment banking) that will be at its top when i’ll be the ceo in a medium/big company. however, these answers (except for the first one), are not very, pass me the word, “notredamy”. this is why i am going to stay very open about what future will bring me, as i understand that right now, i don’t need to have more than a very general idea, and that i am only at the beginning of my journey, because notre dame is not a place you have come to, but it is place to go from. introduction what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clearance? what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? what has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? what are some of the most important questions i have asked this semester? professor pruitt moreau fye 29 november 2021 integration #2 over the past 12 weeks, i have immersed myself into a new environment and had many chances to learn, grow, and deepen my self-knowledge. the moreau first year experience has been a great opportunity for me to become aware of this personal development and discuss my questions, concerns, and nuances with my classmates. i feel that i more deeply understand topics such as belongingness, relationships, my personal faith, courage, and vulnerability. it is important to be comfortable discussing these difficult, deep topics, because our conversations truly facilitate personal development. after learning from these experiences, i am able to walk through life with greater perspective, and the ability to respond to different challenges i encounter with more confidence. during my time at notre dame thus far, my relationships and the bond with my community has grown in importance to me. i had to ask myself many difficult questions about improving interconnectedness with my peers, despite any differences we have. this allowed me to gain diverse perspectives– joining a new community comes with learning from others and encountering different beliefs. furthermore, professor agustin fuentes highlights that having diversity within our communities is so important because it allows us to deconstruct implicit biases that we hold towards people of different backgrounds from us (video: “diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). from these words, i gained a new outlook on my interactions with people, and how i respond to their personal opinions, especially on campus. i now take difficult, personal conversations as an opportunity to step into someone else's shoes and form meaningful connections. i have learned that if we all work to celebrate our differences, and come together to listen and share our personal experiences, our notre dame family will be stronger and more supported. similarly, fr. jenkins stated “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” ( “wesley theological seminary…” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c.–moreau fye week ten). this quote emphasizes how divide stems from hatred, and in the polarized state of our nation, we must learn to love another. fr. jenkins’s words are relevant in my journey of building relationships and community, because in times of political turmoil, we must learn from other people’s experiences to facilitate conversation and progress towards a more unified community. these teachings allow me to grow as a person, friend, and member of society here at notre dame–and to encounter and respond to different situations with an open mind and heart. something that used to be vague and i can now approach with great clarity is my sense of self-acceptance and ability to receive praise and recognition for my accomplishments. imposter syndrome is real, and i have experienced feeling unworthy of my opportunities. following our conversations in moreau, my outlook has changed–it was eye opening to hear my peer’s stories, and how i am not alone in these feelings. according to julia hogan, “the common thread in all of these examples is that these individuals believe they must be perfect and that they must live up to the expectations of others (and themselves). but i’m going to let you in on a little secret: these expectations are arbitrary” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hoganmoreau fye week nine). this quote is meaningful because hogan highlights that the standards we hold ourselves to are usually stemmed from others’s expectations for us. she challenges us to strive towards goals that contribute to our personal needs, and live our lives on our own terms. i am applying her wisdom here at notre dame, by setting my own goals for my health, relationships, academics, and well-being. upon doing this, i feel less imposter syndrome and more like i belong in our newfound community, because i am no longer living for the validation from others. an important question i had to ask myself this semester was, “how can i live with a sense of hope here at notre dame?”. our week twelve class discussion was one of the most meaningful to me. we talked about the importance of hope, and maintaining it through both high and low periods. this conversation stuck with me, especially now when i face the end-of-semester stress over final exams. according to fr. james b. king, “we need to have hope in that process [the contemplation of new ideas beyond our comfort zones] to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. pg 16 – moreau fye week twelve). this quote is insightful because it emphasizes how we must approach our education with a sense of hope. the daunting questions and concepts we are learning are truly what prepare us for the real world, giving us the ability to encounter and respond to any challenge. here at notre dame, i will remember to remain true to myself, my goals, and beliefs, especially during the difficult periods. we cannot give up on ourselves, even during trying times, because this is when the truest test of personal faith occurs. my first semester of the moreau first year experience was truly eye-opening, and i am lucky to have had such meaningful conversations with my peers about topics that have deepened my self-knowledge and personal development. moreau was an amazing opportunity to discuss topics that might not have come up otherwise, but are necessary to speak upon. i feel that i have strengthened my faith, confidence, relationships, sense of community, and perspective from the content and material provided. i am going to continue my education here at notre dame with a newfound ability to encounter and respond to situations that test my faith, hope, and self-understanding. moreau first year seminar megan leis december 3, 2021 integration 2 what have i encountered and how will i respond? so far i have loved my experience at notre dame and have learned so much about myself and others just from being on campus for one semester. i wrote an essay on the homeless population in south bend for my multimedia writing and rhetoric class and came up with very thoughtful realizations about myself. the essay was 9 pages long and required extensive amounts of research, forcing me to engulf myself into this topic. the first realization that i had was realizing how lucky and fortunate i am to live the life that i live and obtain all the luxuries that i possess. i went to a private high school where so many kids were just as fortunate as me. writing the longest essay i have ever written on the homeless in south bend made me realize the bubble that i’ve lived in for the majority of my life. writing this essay was something that i will always be grateful for because of how much knowledge i gained regarding the shell that i’m so used to living in. i have already reached out to homeless shelters here in south bend and i intend to construct plans on how to lower the number of homeless people in south bend. for the week 9 qqc i asked, “do you ever feel like you don’t belong at notre dame due to academic achievement?” it was very interesting to learn from the ted talk video that imposter syndrome is common in anyone despite their background and is very common. it occurs so often that people feel as though they should be a part of something even when they completely deserve to be a part of it. this results in a lack of confidence and can cause people to decide not to apply to jobs in which they would thrive. i’ve seen this very syndrome in myself and others that i surround myself with. people don’t recognize the severity of it and it for sure is a very underrated topic. i personally related to the topic question for this week because i felt feelings of misplacement when i got into the university of notre dame. i was a son of two parents that attended the university which made me feel like that was the ultimate reason for my acceptance. while you can’t ignore this, you also can’t ignore my high school resume which was highly impressive. i took and succeeded in 7 ap classes throughout high school and did lots of sports while starting my own club. i also did a ton of service and had remarkable grades. when you combine my total package i think it’s fair that i got into notre dame. my accomplishments sometimes get forgotten by me and i often think that “i only got into this school because of my parents.” it’s important to reflect on your hard work in the past so that you realize why you deserve what you have accomplished. the week 10 qqc focus question asked “what are the central challenges of my community and how do i respond?” it was fascinating to read about how a school got criticized for not including an extracurricular activity that all people would feel safe going to regarding their identity. “they demand that their schools implement curriculum, student formation, hiring and programmatic measures to promote greater diversity, equity and inclusion (d.e.i.). they want to see accountability and progress in meeting measurable goals in these areas. in response to these grievances and claims, school leaders have adopted and announced various new d.e.i. measures and resources during this school year” (devron 3). people were obviously unhappy with the school's way of including diversity and equity inclusion. whether or not you agree or disagree with what is being criticised by other people regarding your school, it is always important to listen and take action. the leaders of the school (faculty and student leaders) are responsible for ensuring that the school operates at a level that everyone is comfortable with. when people criticize the safety of the school in terms of inclusion, action is needed as soon as possible. the fact that student leaders immediately implemented d.e.i. into the school curriculum shows how good the student leaders are. they listened to what people were saying and helped make their school a better place and safer zone for other students. this story relates to me because i consider myself a leader in school, and i feel as though this was especially the case in high school. while i succeeded in being a good athlete at high school, i was different from a lot of the talented athletes. i treated everyone with respect and the same way i treated my friends on the football and basketball teams. this gave me a good reputation and made me an unspoken leader which a lot of my friends were not seen as. i always ensured that our school was a place of inclusion because there was never a reason not to include everyone. our school never received criticism with regards to inclusion, but we received criticism in other areas. when we received criticism i felt as though i had a responsibility to ensure that our school changed its habits in order to eliminate those criticisms. that’s what being a leader is all about. i chose to write about these specific qqcs in my integration paper because these were the two that left the greatest impact on me during my time and experience with moreau. i think the biggest thing for me is reflection because once i begin to reflect, i start learning so much about myself and others. moreau was such a great class for me to utilize transitioning into college because it provided clarity about my identity and ambitions. i felt as though i could be a free spirit in moreau class and when doing assignments for moreau. that’s the exact quality that makes moreau priceless for any student at notre dame. i was extremely blessed to have megan as a teacher and i will never forget the impact that she (you) left on my life. i can’t wait to take moreau next semester and use it to help me spread my wings and fly. don’t wait i have a quote-a-day calendar in my room, and one day about four or five weeks ago the quote said something like “don’t wait for the life you want, make what you want a reality today.” i tend to get caught up in the mindset of if i work really hard now then i can get a good job and have a perfect life when i get older. but this quote made me reconsider that perspective and i realized that kind of thinking was why i don’t prioritize my own health and happiness. so now i am trying to change that. i remember the week i was thinking about all of this stuff i worked out everyday, i was reading every night, and i would treat myself to coffee or whatever made me feel happy throughout the day. it was a good week and everyday i still remind myself that i have to choose to live the life i want since happiness is not guaranteed in the future and all i really have control over is how i feel today. of course, this week led into a week where i had a really heavy workload and i was really stressed about school and my future. this was week 9, and our qqc was responding to an article about letting go of expectations. the quote i used was “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i remember i really didn’t like this reading because it somewhat dismissed my entire belief system; but now looking back, i have an entirely different perspective. once i realized that i am responsible for living in a way that brings me happiness, i began to apply that to school and i realized that i don’t need to have the same attitude toward college as i did toward highschool. high school was high stakes; i had high expectations for myself because i knew that i could achieve those expectations and because i needed to get into a good college. but now that i am here at notre dame, i don’t have those super high expectations because i know some things are going to be unachievable and that just graduating from here with decent grades is enough for me to get into a grad program and get a good job. so now i do believe in “just doing your best”, because now i know that my best is actually good enough. this process of re-evaluating my priorities was also spurred by my family. the first week of november my grandma passed away. she lived with us and my parents took care of her for the last five years of her life. i wasn’t super close with her since she had dementia and was almost entirely deaf, but it was still really hard to watch my dad grieve the loss of his mother. she passed on a saturday night and we came home that sunday just for the day, and then we came back the next weekend for the funeral. the whole thing was really difficult for everyone and i tried to be as helpful as possible but there was nothing i could do to really make anyone feel better. the class discussion on the monday after she passed was about brokenness and i remember that we wrote down what brokenness means to us, and the first thing that came to my head was seeing my dad break down in tears the day before. it is hard to be that close to brokenness and not be able to do anything to help. i am not really close with my dad or his side of the family, so seeing them in pain and not knowing how to help was difficult and it made me realize that i don’t want to be in that situation again. it made me realize how much i appreciate my relationships with my family and my friends, so now i am trying to open up more to the people in my life so they know how much i really care about them. while this was happening with my family i was still thinking about expectations and school and my responsibility to myself, and i realized that i caused so much brokenness to myself due to my definition of success. like i said, i had really high expectations for myself and i met those expectations, but now i have realized that success is less about being the best and more about feeling fulfilled. now my definition of success is just fulfillment and i am trying to live every day in a way that makes me feel fulfilled, and i am doing everything i can to build a life that will help me feel even more fulfilled. week 10 was about brokenness and i remember our qqc was responding to an article about critical race theory. i really liked the article and the quote i chose was “... the church has taught explicitly that sin and evil manifest themselves in social structures” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten). i felt this concept really deeply as someone who pays attention to and cares alot about social justice and inequality. it is hard to know what to do with all the brokenness we encounter in the world, but having a framework of faith helps me understand that suffering has meaning and that my education and knowledge level comes with responsibility to do good. and since i realized the responsibility i have to myself to live a life i love, i see my responsibility to the world as an extension of that responsibility to myself since i know that i am responsible for not only creating the life i want, but i am also responsible for creating a world i want to live in. further, the next qqc responded to c.s. lewis’ the screwtape letters, and the quote i chose was, “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring but still intending to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished and though questioning why he has been forsaken, still obeys” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i love this quote because it reminds me that i am strong because i have seen so much ugliness in our world and i still have faith in god and his plan for humanity. i believe that everything is in his hands, but i also believe that he gives us all purpose and the responsibility to create a world we love. in these past few weeks i have realized my responsibility to build a life i love, to build a world i love, and do what really matters. building a life i love means remembering that my life right now is not as high stakes as it seems. building a world i love means paying attention and speaking out against injustice and including others in the conversations since “change is difficult but more possible when we see and hear multiple voices” (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). and lastly, doing what really matters means structuring my day-to-day life in a way that brings me fulfillment. moreau integration assignment donata carinato moreau first year experience what shapes me and how am i actively aware of it since coming to notre dame, i have had to very much reflect on. being in a new place, surrounded by new people who don't know me, has been a good opportunity to think about who i am, and who i want to be. before getting here, someone gave me the advice, “in college you can be who you want to be, you can change yourself if you want!”. my time in moreau so far has allowed me to have an organized way to analyze who i am and who i want to be in this new environment, and through this experience i feel i have learned a lot. i did learn some of my root beliefs and i feel i have a better idea of what values i find most important to follow in my life. i believe that one of the most important root beliefs in my life is that i believe i am searching for kindness and looking to spread kindness and gratitude. i believe i am searching for kindness in many aspects of my life. kindness, gratitude, and humor were my top three virtues in the online quiz we took, and when i reflected, i found that those values are ones i want to exemplify and that i am attracted to in my life. one quote i found very important regarding values was, “you wrestle with that sin and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“should you live for your resume of your eulogy” by david brooks, moreau fye week 2). through being uncomfortable at school and analyzing who i am, i had to face some struggles, but i was also able to discover my key values and begin to realize what i want my character to be. learning about myself was difficult, but it paid off, as we learned in week 1,“they didn't talk about vulnerability being comfortable… they just talked about it being necessary” (“the power of vulnerability”brene brown, moreau fye week 1). i believe that living my life with those ideas and values in mind will help me to live my best life and be the most happy with the person i am. i believe that acting in ways that are most virtuous and respectable in my eyes will help me to best love myself, which will also open me up to loving others and creating more meaningful relationships. kindness and respect also transfer to meaningful relationships this way. one key value that has been said multiple times to me on notre dame's campus and that i also think is very important is, “it’s on us to be our brothers and sisters keeper” (“it’s on us nd-the three d’s of being an active bystander, moreau fye week 4). treating others with kindness and respect are what i believe to be the basis of meaningful relationships. again, kindness, gratitude, and respect are values that i believe are most important for me to follow in my life and look for in others. i believe my best and most meaningful relationships will stem mostly from leading with kindness and respect, and looking for others who treat me the same. i also believe that putting forward the values i believe to be most important, i will respect and love myself which will then also open myself up to love others as best i can. week 7 assignment also showed how respect is needed for others, and part of that kindness and respect is being aware of stereotypes and biases. as the video said, “show a people as one thing as only one thing over and over again and that is what they become”(“the danger of a single story”chimamanda adichie, moreau fye week 7). in order to truly treat people with respect and kindness, i have to treat them fairly and take the steps to not stereotype them and be aware of my own biases. when i reflected on narratives and selfknowledge i again learned that i believe kindness and respect are two virtues that i should make an effort to always put forward in order to then be remembered for them. when watching the video, “should you live for your resume of your eulogy”, i realized that one of the biggest things i want to be remembered for is kindness and respect towards others. when everything boils down and i reflect on my life as a whole, i was to see that i was someone who displayed traits i am proud of. i believe that kindness and respect are the best virtues that will make me proud of myself down the line, and hopefully make people proud of me even after i am gone. reflecting on self knowledge also made me think about my faults and where i could improve. i believe being aware of my faults, however painful it is, is something that will ultimately help me to be the best version of myself. in this situation, suffering and troubling facts is a necessary pain that will help for me to reach my best potential and live a great life. i also believe that presenting kindness and love outward will help me to live my best life and take notice of the wonderful things around me, helping me“sharpen your vision on the good and great things that are right in front of you and that are in store for you.” (“letare medalist address” carla harris, moreau fye week 5). my poem, one of our most recent assignments, was again a chance to reflect on who i am, and what made me that way. i started my poem by talking about my family, the physical places i grew up or the tangible memories i have. as the poem went on, i started naturally flowing into talking about the feelings, values, and morals that have shaped me, and again i found myself coming to kindness and love. my parents, especially my mom, have always made known the importance of being kind, taking care of others, and spreading love, and in reality those beliefs and ways of life have been some of what has shaped me the most in my life, and i am grateful for it. to quote my own poem, “i am from my mothers love/ her universal kindness… i am from a place of love”(moreau fye week 6). i believe that time and time again, when i looked in on myselfhowever uncomfortable and difficult it was to doi have found that kindness, love, and respect are the most important things in my life. they are the values i will continue trying to emulate, the values i will look for in other people i want in my life, and the values that have made me who i am. i also know that i need to continue taking care of myself, and “first, be patient” (“the role of faith in our storyfr. pete, moreau fye week 3). i know that i will continue to face struggles in my life and that things will continue to challenge me or make me uncomfortable, but through it all i hope that i keep learning about myself, and i believe that i will be able to handle it with the values and virtues that i hold most dear, and the people that support me here at notre dame. moreau integration 2 responding to difficulties the material covered throughout the past few weeks of moreau first year experience have helped me understand everyday problems that are experienced by people, and ways in which they can be fixed. i am able to relate these ideas to things that i have personally experienced, and now have a better understanding of how to respond to these situations. during week 9, we discussed the importance of following one’s own passions rather than conforming to the expectations of others. the articles that we read that week explain how external pressure from family and friends can cause people to do things that they don’t want internally. specifically, the articles talk about college students, and the way in which they may pick their major and career paths based on the expectations of their parents. personally, i am not pressured by my family to pick a specific major. if i was, these articles would give me a greater understanding of the importance of letting go of these expectations. “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life.” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). other topics were discussed in week 9, such as imposter syndrome and the struggles of adapting to college life. the ted-ed video by elizabeth cox explains that imposter syndrome is a common phenomenon where people believe that they haven’t earned their accomplishments. i could relate to this video because i have had these feelings before. when applying to colleges, i was hesitant to put a lot of my accomplishments on my application, because i thought that they weren’t important, or because i believed that i didn’t earn them. another video that i could relate to was “my college transition” by emery bergmann. in this video, emery explains how it is common for freshmen in college to feel disconnected and struggle to find a strong friend group. i have definitely had experiences that are similar to emery’s, and the video helped me understand that these feelings are normal. during week 10, we discussed societal conflicts, and ways in which they can be resolved. the materials from this week address specific issues that are prevalent in today’s society, and reveal how they can be handled. in his commencement address, fr. john jenkins, c.s.c., describes how hatred is the root cause of modern societal problems. he states, “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other” (wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). fr. jenkins believes that people often do not realize their own hatred, since it can be disguised as virtue and conviction. in order to prevent this from continuing, we all must take a step back and reflect on any hatred within ourselves, and eliminate it. another article that we read that week was “should catholic schools https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ teach critical race theory?” by christopher devron. in this article, devron suggests that catholic social teaching should be used to teach students the systemic racism that exists in american society. with this method, students will be able to use their knowledge of catholic values to combat modern injustice. the final video from week 10 showed how kirsten helgeson’s kintsugi pottery class provides emotional healing for the women who participated in it. according to helgeson, the way in which broken pottery is repaired with gold represents the philosophy that all the experiences of a person, both good and bad, contribute to who they are. during week 11, we talked about how communities of diverse individuals form and flourish. we learned that conflicts and dissimilarities between people of different backgrounds and cultures can hinder the formation of a sense of community. however, communities are essential for human prosperity, and they are created by overcoming our challenges and conflicts. “we were created in and for a complex ecology of relatedness, and without it we wither and die. this simple fact has critical implications: community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). this article describes how communities naturally form through embracing all its members and overcoming difficult experiences. the other two resources for this week explain how cultural insensitivity and racial misconceptions and stereotypes are barriers to a strong, diverse community. in his ted talk, agustin fuentes described common biases that people unconsciously hold against other races. these biases can be overcome by understanding different viewpoints and hearing the voices of minority groups. diversity is an extremely important aspect to have in a community, but this can be accomplished more easily if a society makes a conscious effort to change. additionally, the klau center’s “with voices true” provides insight into the lives of several people who have experienced discrimination. by listening to these stories, people are able to understand the perspectives of others and work to create a community where this kind of insensitivity is not a problem. during week 12, we discussed the ways in which hope can help us overcome difficult situations. the supplemental readings reveal how hope can provide spiritual strength to those facing challenges. “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it…” (holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12). having hope is vital while trying something new or taking a big risk. in this piece, king also describes how moreau hoped for the success of the newly founded university of notre dame and its students. the other piece of reading was an excerpt from the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis. in this piece, the concept of having faith and hope for god is discussed from the perspective of a demon. he explains how people become closer to god when they maintain faith in him, even in the toughest of times. even when it seems like god has abandoned us, it is important to have hope, since it is what will ultimately draw us closer to him. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503?module_item_id=105314 overall, these lessons have helped me understand how i can work towards creating a better college experience for myself and my fellow students. it is natural for difficult challenges to occur, and it is important to know how to react in order to make the situation better. integration 1 arcidiacono 1 growth and thankfulness i believe that i should focus on fixing myself rather than the rest of the world. i believe that the key to joy is overcoming our natural negativity bias. i believe that i should be rather than seem. i believe that i should focus on fixing myself rather than the rest of the world. there is simply too much wrong with this world for one man to try and fix it all. but the best that i can possibly do is make myself the best man i can be. originally, i came up with this idea because i thought the best way to do the most good was to make myself into someone who is capable of doing lots of good. this idea goes hand in hand with brene brown’s talk on vulnerability. she says: “we can’t practice compassion with other people if we can’t treat ourselves kindly” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown, moreau fye week 1). in other words, if we want to be compassionate, we need to be good, self-loving people. however, now i believe that the end goal is my personal growth, rather than the good i bring into the world. i got this new idea from my dad when i told him that this was my method of doing good. he simply asked if maybe god put us on this earth so we can grow and learn rather than try and fix the world. this caught me off guard and really impacted my perspective on what the meaning of life is. i think this also relates to an idea that stood out to me in david brook’s ted talk. he says: “adam one is built by building on our strengths; adam two is built by fighting your weaknesses” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks, moreau fye week 2). as a strong supporter of adam two, this quote supports the idea that our purpose here on earth is to grow. if it was simply to bring good, maximizing strengths would make sense, but fixing our weaknesses is what we should be focusing on. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim arcidiacono 2 i believe that the key to joy is overcoming our natural negativity bias. after going through my first breakup, i was in a very bad place and decided to see a councelor in order to help me overcome my depression. he was the one who introduced me to how we naturally focus on the negative parts of life. since then, i have tried very hard to focus on the positive aspects of life to counteract this negativity biad and have become a much more joyful person. i think this relates a lot to what chimamanda adichie said in her talk on stories: “all of these stories make me who i am, but to insist on only these negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie, moreau fye week 7). our lives can’t just be defined by our sufferings, that leaves out way too much of the story. granted, we shouldn’t only focus on the good, as that will leave us vulnerable to naivety, but a good balance is how we find joy in life. this belief greatly influenced my “where i’m from” poem. one of my favorite lines in the poem reads: “where the familiar walls bring peace to my soul, // and joy overwhelms me as i know i am home.” (“where i’m from” by , moreau fye week 6). i really tried to focus on the pleasant things in life in writing that poem, and i was truly joyful in remembering all the great things about home. i believe that peace comes from faith. one of my favorite songs of all time is “no hard feelings” by the avett brothers. the song describes death, but in a positive light as it describes laughing with jesus as we meet him for the first time. whenever i listen to this song, i am at complete peace as even death shouldn’t be feared. and, to quote victor from the class of 2023, “the one thing that i could never lose and that no one could ever take away from me is my faith” (“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by victor, moreau fye week 3). with this combination of not fearing death from my faith, and my faith being something that i can always cling to, i can be at peace. in addition to peace about death, faith brings peace in other struggles. in his letter to blessed basil https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1dr__bi_4jtdplcgqt0xesl9yrb3wq19v4yxzhyiyngo/edit https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view arcidiacono 3 moreau, fr. sorin wrote: “the weather did not moderate for a moment; each morning the wind seemed to us more piercing, as we pulled forward on our journey due north. but god was with us” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau” by father sorin, moreau fye week 5). fr. sorin faced great difficulties when trying to reach south bend, but he was at peace because he knew god was watching over them. in this way, anyone with faith can be at peace in any situation. i believe that i should be rather than seem (esse quam videri north carolina’s motto). one of the greatest temptations in life is to look like you have a positive characteristic without actually having that characteristic. however, it is clear that this temptation is wrong, especially in the light that jesus tells us to give to the poor in secret rather than in front of a crowd. this belief has impacted my life leading up to this point a lot as it led me to advocate against social media. when i had social media, i wanted to show off all my talents and good traits and would exaggerate what i was capable of doing. i soon realized how much better it would be to actually possess those characteristics than just trying to pretend to have them. i quit social media, gave a talk to my high school about its dangers, and wrote my main college essay about that talk. this relates to a quote i liked in the article on toxic relationships. it says: “beware of the friend who says they hate drama. unfortunately, this is usually the kind of friend who actually loves drama and frequently finds himor herself in the center of it” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia taylor, moreau fye week 4). people who say they hate drama try to act like they are above drama, but that energy spent acting could be much better spent actually avoiding drama. we must combat this desire to seem if we are to become the best people we can be. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ integration tyler martino integration moreau 10/15/21 college: the time for mental growth and personal reflection college is a time of individual growth and self-discovery. throughout the past few weeks, i’ve been witness to many different changes in both my personal and academic lives that have stemmed directly from my experiences at notre dame. the people i have met and the events that i have been exposed to have all contributed to make me aware of what i believe in. this moreau course has helped me to become aware of these changes as they happen in real time, and have given me the building blocks necessary to help me discern what has shaped me and my beliefs up to this point in my life. i have been the lucky recipient of love in my life: growing up in a loving household around caring friends has helped me to understand the importance of this emotion in our world. through my experiences with others in and around campus, i have come to the belief that the most important thing that i can give to this world is my love and attention. in her ted talk, brené brown explains that “there’s only one variable that separates the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging from those who really struggle for it, and that is the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging. that’s it” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i have always been taught to treat people with love and respect, and in recent weeks i’ve been the lucky recipient of reciprocated love. new college students are inundated with countless experiences and expectations that reshape our lives as we know it. the only way to get through it properly is when we have a firm group of people around us helping to promote a sense of belonging. there were several times during my first week at notre dame where i felt isolated and lonely, but when it reached a level that i was uncomfortable with there would always be someone who would reach out or introduce themself that would ease my nerves and make me feel deserving of belonging. throughout our lives there will always be a search for knowledge about who we are as an individual. no matter how well we think we know ourselves, there is always something new that makes itself known. i believe that i will always be searching for new things about myself throughout my life, and that it is my responsibility to explore those ideas in order to make myself a better person. according to david brooks, “we happen to live in a society that favors adam 1, and neglects adam 2. the problem is that it turns you into a shrewd animal, who treats life as a game, and you become a cold, calculating creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity” ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two) . this quote explores the idea of who people have the potential of becoming if they don’t pay attention to the practices that make us better people. after taking a personality test for this module, i received the following characteristics: honesty, fairness, forgiveness, and kindness. if i know myself like i think i do , i think those traits are relatively accurate. i strive for honesty, and am kind to a fault. i like to think that i’m respectful to everyone i encounter, no matter who they are or what my opinions of them are. through my experience as a cashier i’ve found that kindness, understanding and patience can break through in even the most hostile and ill-tempered situations. comparing those traits with the points made by mr. brooks, i think that i am on the path to making a good eulogy for myself. while i am certainly looking to build up my resume (i don’t think harvard medical school would would be jumping to accept a resume from a kid who’s got one year of experience cashiering for bj’s wholesale club), my main focus is on the humanity and morality that will make me the best person and best professional i can be. college is the first time where kids are expected to do everything completely on their own without the supervision of their parents. i believe that i am an independent person who is able to learn and live on my own, yet i am also extremely dependent on the love and support that comes from my friends and family. as father pete mccormick says in his video for this week, “when i was driving with my parents, all roads would lead home. when i was driving by myself, it was a little more unclear” ("the role of faith in our story" by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week 3). as humans, the love and support that we receive from others is imperative to a meaningful and happy life. without guidance and help from others, we become lost and confused as to where we are supposed to be going on our personal journey. this quote reflects that perfectly, especially from the standpoint of a young adult who is finally learning what it’s like to be “on their own”. growing up, we have a plethora of resources at our fingertips: siblings, teachers, friends, and most of all parents. they’re all helping us through our formative years whether we know it or not, and we can become blind to the fact that these influences are there. but once we are thrust into a new and confusing environment completely alone, we realize how big and empty this world can be. i’ve certainly experienced that as i adjust to college life, looking for friends and mentors among a sea of people who i don’t know. it’s daunting, but necessary to improve upon yourself as a student, and as a person. relationships are a necessary and crucial part of life that require time and effort to maintain. i believe that relationships are the way to a happy life, both for yourself and those who you have the relationships with. one quote from the week that stood out to me was “attention is one of the rarest forms of love” ("5 signs you're in a toxic relationship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). as someone who has grown up in the age of phones and electronics, i’ve become accustomed to people not being fully present in conversations (and guilty of it too. i like to think of myself as a multitasker, but the more i try the more i realize it’s impossible to properly pay attention to two things at the same time). complete, unwavering attention is becoming quite hard to comeby these days. looking at phones at the dinner table, listening to someone talk while simultaneously scrolling through instagram feeds, and, of course, doing homework while watching the bills on sunday are all common examples of this new form of chronic multitasking. i have had plenty of instances where i feel as if i’m not being properly listened to, and i try my best to make sure others don’t feel like that when talking to me. when you’re in a committed relationship with someone in any capacity, you should be genuinely interested in what they have to say. anything less should make you reconsider the priorities in the relationship and see what you can change to make things right. when you give someone your full attention, it is a testament to how much you care about them in a truly loving way. fear of the unknown can be paralyzing, and going to college for the first time is one of the greatest examples of this. but being able to get over this fear and recognize opportunities instead of obstacles is one of the greatest habits we can employ. i believe that fear is a necessary part of life, but it’s detrimental effects can be mitigated through certain mindsets and positive mental techniques. in carla harris’s laetare medal speech, she says that “fear is just ‘false evidence of things appearing real” ("2021 laetare medal address" by carla harris moreau fye week 5). ever since i was a young boy i’ve loved collecting quotes. if something strikes me as interesting or intriguing, i’ll write it down in a big book that i’ve compiled of things that i’ve heard throughout the years. the quote that started it all (which just so happens to be my favorite quote) is from the movie “a bronx tale”. robert de niro pulls his son aside and tells him that “the saddest thing in life is wasted talent”. this is the quote that would always pop in my head whenever i was tired of schoolwork, or thought that i wasn’t good enough to do something throughout my formative years, and because i’ve followed that mantra i’ve found my way to my dream school of notre dame. one of the other quotes in that book is one from mark twain which i think really pertains to the one mentioned above from carla harris. twain writes that “i am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened”. when we fear something, we give it power over us. the thought of it is often worse than the reality, which is ironic since we don’t have to think about it at all yet we force ourselves to go through that mental strife in preparation for the task ahead. if we can realize that fear is something that can be countered with reason, as well as muster the courage to see what is truly there (or not really there, according to twain), we will be better people for it. we are all shaped by our experiences in life, whether we know it or not. change is inevitable, which can either be used to our advantage, or can turn into a hindrance. i believe that i am inextricably linked to certain aspects of my childhood, and these are what have led me to become the person i am today. in the poem from this week’s materials, the poet writes “i am from those moments/snapped before i budded/leaf-fall from the family tree” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). this poem builds upon the idea that we all come from certain things that we can neither explain nor recognize. it’s only through retrospection and time that we can see some of the events that shape us into who we are today. in my poem i talked about how i come from a “a little-big town, with quietly incredible people/i hope to one day walk in their shoes”, because my neighborhood and my city have both ingrained in me a sense of leadership and humble respectability that i value immensely. i’ve interacted with and learned from so many people, and i can pinpoint certain areas of my personality that have been shaped by these encounters. realizing that other people have different perspectives is one of the most important yet least utilized skills in society. people are quick to judge those who do not share the same opinion without trying to understand why someone might feel the way they do about a certain topic. after all, no one is a firm activist for something without a reason. i believe that i am a person who is able to look at both sides of the argument without being so quick to judge as to disregard the other person’s opinion. the quote from this week was “the collapse of trust, the rise of animosity -these are emotional problems, not intellectual ones” (https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource= articleshare by david brooks moreau fye week 7). this quote is a profound look at the current state of our country, and most importantly our world as a whole. as can often be seen in high-stakes situations, emotion gets the best of us and drives our actions when our rational mind should be the one behind the wheel. in this era of manipulation and alternative truth, many people are preying on the emotional impulses of others in order to obtain a specific result. new and other media use clickbait in order to arouse an emotional response in viewers that make them think “how dare they!” instead of asking “why did they?”. there are two sides to every argument, but if someone is riled up enough then there is only one in their mind. even the most intellectual people can be taken over by these impulses, which is the most troubling part about this current habit of society. through my time at notre dame, i’ve discovered more about myself than i can comprehend, and this education of mind and body will not be coming to an end anytime soon. as the weeks roll on, the lessons that we learn in moreau will only become more prevalent as we continue to search for who we are, and who we believe we are becoming. mercado 2 fa21-fys-10101-107 nhat nguyen 15 october 2021 time cultivates and nourishes the soul david kekich once said, “cherish time. your most valuable resource. you can never make up the time you lose. the most important choices you’ll ever make are how you use your time.” a root belief that i hold is that time is the most precious thing we have at our disposal. throughout these past seven weeks, i have found my other root beliefs relating to that statement in distinct ways. in the first week of moreau, we discussed the importance of vulnerability and how the lack thereof contributes to lessened experiences throughout our life. a root belief i had prior to this module was that we are made to be vulnerable because it improves our understandings in a way that allows us to fully appreciate and enjoy the events in our lives whether they are good or bad. i firmly think this because i understand i have limited myself to certain things because i have not always allowed myself to be fully susceptible to people and events in my life which has caused me to miss out on certain events in life like romantic endeavors. becoming vulnerable, like everything else, takes time especially after having been exposed to factors that make one less likely to be open. with the discussions from class and meeting new people from different backgrounds, i found myself being the most vulnerable i have ever been in years. i genuinely took the ted talk to heart and wanted to do my absolute best in executing everything that was presented to us from browne; i particularly loved when browne said, “one cannot selectively numb the negative feelings such as grief and shame because you’d also be numbing true joy, gratitude, and happiness.” after this module, i wanted to be more susceptible to these emotions so that i can be “deeply seen, love whole-heartedly, and believe that i am enough.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) during the second week, we began to search for more self-knowledge via surveys and a ted talk from david brooks that focused on the importance of balancing ourselves with success and emotions. he really made me think about how society values the measurable successes way more than the ability to feel compassion and empathy because of how reward driven the community has become. the belief that tied into this module was that people in our community should continue to focus on helping one another rather than becoming like other places and only worrying about oneself. as i have made my way through the first half of the semester, i continued to stay in touch with friends in other universities and colleges who’ve had a very different experience than me. i would talk about how helpful and understanding everyone is here, but my friend in penn said that her environment was more competitive than collaborative. she described the people to be more worried about their personal victories rather than aiding others to reach their highest potential. i knew at that moment that i didn’t want notre dame to ever lose its cooperative atmosphere, which is why i believe that this, like my community back in texas, should always be able to help one another without sabotaging the other person. the balance between our 2 adams, the successful, hardworking version, and the compassionate, human version, in a way that is beneficial to them and others so we do not become “mindless machines without emotional sonorousness.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two) week three we moved on to searching for a framework that allowed us to begin viewing the world in a way that correlates with our faith. i believe that i grow in all aspects by allowing my spiritual relation with god develop into an ever-flourishing connection. the reason why i believe this is because i have come to feel as though my faith in him has allowed me to be more empathetic, optimistic, and mindful of my actions when it pertains to others and myself; i have been able to take the teachings from my parents and those in my religion to form my reasons for the things that i do. it has taken me years to get to the point in my faith where i believe that i can continue to further delve into the aspects of religion that help me become a better person. the student reflections we read were especially eye-opening and interesting because of how all their journeys differed from one another. i especially loved leo’s comment where he stated, “faith serves as a stabilizer and a constant in a life that may otherwise be disorienting or overwhelming. faith gives me a focal point in my life that motivates, inspires, and directs me as i try to better myself and advance my career.” i have always felt that believing in my faith has given me the ability to feel grounded in place even when things around me were cascading down. believing in anything, no matter whether it is religious or not, is an amazing thing to have in life because it inspires us to move forward and improve regardless of circumstances. the trips to the grotto and the retreats that i’ve been a part of have already been major influences in my spiritual life as a student here on campus. as i continue to live my life here in notre dame, i realize that “faith wasn’t always so major in my life,” but that i have chosen a place where the religious aspect is so big that i know i will emerge from here with an even deeper connection to the one up above. (“student reflections on faith” curated by campus ministry – moreau fye week 3) the fourth week we focused on the aspect of life that concerns forming relationships with people that are healthy and beneficial to our lives. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships through having honesty and trustworthiness serve as a foundation with which i have every current connection stand on; without those core fundamentals in my friendships, i am not sure whether i would be able to fully connect and believe others who don’t seem to be genuine, caring individuals. as we have all had our fair share and experiences with people throughout our lives, we have all had a run-in with some people who have just not been healthy for us, yet we continued to have a bond with them until eventually we didn’t. the articles from this week were especially captivating because it talked about how we tend to overlook red flags simply because we want to continue to believe that people are not what they seem, even despite constant manipulations or harmful things happening. although i have been here at notre dame for a mere 7 weeks, i have already met a couple of people whom i realized were not ideal friends to have around just because they would only talk to me for a gateway into homework aid or other friends i’ve made. as i reflected on my past experiences, i was able to keep them at arm’s length and slowly burn the bridges between us so that there was no risk of being used or taken advantage of. it has been a slow process, but the encounters i’ve had before, and those i will inevitably have during my time here, will further serve to improve my abilities in acknowledging and listening to the red flags instead of always brushing them off as unimportant. olivia’s statement, “our red flags start going off when we start to notice our friend is taking more than giving, but sometimes we don’t want to admit it to ourselves,” perfectly sums up the main takeaway from this module; however, we must be able to work on being able to distinguish those who are good for us and those who are not. (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto – moreau fye week 4) during our fifth week, we began to consider how our stories have formed our journey and experiences throughout our lives, especially with the implication of time looming over our heads at every turn. i believe that i am responsible for allowing myself to grow with every event i’ve faced and making it work in my favor one way or the other; even if the encounter itself was negative, i must remind myself that it taught me something regardless. as we undergraduates begin to really live the notre dame lifestyle, many of us will begin to question our capabilities or if the major we chose is going to work out for us in the end. it is crucial for us to understand that, in the end, we have not wasted time in our endeavors and that idea will show once we fully grasp that all we do will have a purpose in the grand scheme of things. what we do now is not a waste of time, but merely an investment in our future selves in the hope that we will understand the reason for why we did it in the first place. i’ve already had doubts and moments where i felt like my efforts were wasted, but i just keep reminding myself that everything happens for a reason and that i can always learn something from the choices and actions i make. i have witnessed multiple students dropping courses and switching their majors and eventually they began to thrive and see that the time they spent in the beginning weeks were not fruitless because they discovered that something else would be better for them. carla harris summarized the meaning of this module best in her speech when she proclaimed, “we have all learned how precious time is, and that it is the most important asset that you have. while we can all get more money, houses, cars, and things, we can never get more time; therefore, we should be extremely intentional with our time and spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye week 5) the sixth week we just focused on our roots and initial journey to what shaped us as people. the purpose of this week was to reflect on our experiences and other factors that contributed to how we grew up and formed our aspirations. after having read a sample poem, it was up to me to create a personal poetic piece that covers those origins of who i am now. i summed up my origins as coming from a place of immense love and support because my parents have always instilled me with that strong compassion and curiosity throughout every venture of interest i had. their constant care and encouraging words really made me have a firm belief that my purpose in life is to experiment and figure out what i love and what i do not so that i am never negating myself from an experience that i desire to try. they have always been with me through thick and thin, and i will never allow myself to be blocked from doing what i love or trying new things simply because of what others believe i can or cannot do. thanks to “un amor que no se puede quebrar sobre la distancia porque es infinita y eterna.” (“i am from love” by – moreau fye week 6) finally, during our seventh week in moreau, we touched base on the importance of identifying perspectives so that we could work toward pursuing the truth in every situation. prior to this module, i firmly held on to the belief that a story is not 2-dimensional and that there will always be another perspective that must be analyzed before construing a conclusion about it. in our societies, people find it so easy to generalize and form assumptions on people and situations with only the provision of limited information and a lack of research into these given details. to prevent such behavior and comments, we must work together as a society to continue providing more sides of the same story to show that there is not only one main story; we cannot keep placing one person or situation above an entire group of people because not everyone does not act the same regardless of where they’re from. as chimamanda said, “i've always felt that it is impossible to engage properly with a place or a person without engaging with all of the stories of that place and that person. the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar.” without taking the time to look at and properly analyze all the different perspectives and viewpoints involved in something, it is impossible for us to come to an accurately complete idea of what took place. thus, to pursue the truth we must remember that there is always more than one side to a story. we cannot continue to be victim to the “single stories” that are fed to us in an attempt to provide only certain views about specific groups of people or events that took place; we must continue to look at the other dimensions involved so we can properly view a “complete” version of the story. (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi – moreau fye week 7) conclusively, all these smaller beliefs have a connection to my big belief regarding time and its importance in our lives because of how priceless the resource is. everything we’ve discussed throughout our modules are things that take time to do; it takes time to be vulnerable, create a balance between work and emotions, fulfill a religious relationship, form genuine connections, learn from past experiences, reflect on our roots, and pursue the full, complete truth. one cannot do these things overnight or all at once, it is something that requires immense focus and selectivity to further improve ourselves in a way that makes us holistically improved and complete. thus, we must continue to value and use our time wisely so that throughout our lives we continue to grow and discover ourselves in a way that benefits us and others. korth catherine wagner moreau fye 15 october 2021 forming a foundation for many people, college is a defining and formative experience through which they come to better understand who they are, what they believe, and their purpose in life. i hope this is the case for me as i embark on my journey at notre dame. however, before discerning these major life questions, i think it’s important to establish a foundation of core beliefs that may be built upon. from my experiences in life so far, i’ve come to believe that i thrive in spaces where i feel that i belong, that i grow in the face of adversity, and that i pursue truth by keeping an open heart and mind. from the time i was born until i was five years old, i lived in a house with my mom, my grandparents, my aunt janelle, my aunt emily, my uncle scott, and my cousin haley in a small, rural town called lindsay. i did not grow up with a conventional family in a “normal” house, but i still recognized my grandparents’ house as my home. through the years of watching cartoons with my grandma, playing on the swing set with my cousin, and reading picture books with my mom, i always felt welcomed and loved in my home. my family taught me that a home is more than a place; home is wherever i feel i belong. my family raised me in a way that coincides with brené brown’s outlook on parenting. “our job is to look and say, ‘you know what? you’re imperfect, and you’re wired for struggle, but you are worthy of love and belonging,’” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i’ve found that i search for this sense of love and belonging everywhere i go in life and that i am rarely content if i feel i am somewhere i do not belong. in high school, i felt that i had nothing in common with the athletes in my class because i was not athletically inclined, and i did not know the first thing about sports. therefore, i searched for belonging by getting involved in fine arts activities. it was through these activities that i met my closest friends and found a passion for acting, singing, and public speaking. by and by, the stage became my home, and the talented actors and singers with whom i shared the spotlight became my family. when i think back on my time as a thespian, i will not remember the applause or the stage bows. rather, i will never forget the community of people who made me feel so overwhelmingly welcomed and accepted on that stage. the friendships i formed in theater helped set a precedent for the friendships i seek out now. “think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend. the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there,” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). my theater friends and i always supported and uplifted each other regardless of who was competing for the lead role of the play. those are the kinds of friendships i plan to cultivate at notre dame and beyond. upon reflecting on some of the painful experiences i’ve gone through, i realized that i’m, in a way, grateful for them because they made me into the person i am today. in my “where i’m from” poem, i repeatedly emphasized the hardships i suffered because of socioeconomic status or because i was raised in a non-conventional household (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). however, i always linked each hardship in the poem to something positive. i only came to understand this belief that sorrow bears fruit after reflecting on the hellish year of 2020. 2020 was a particularly impressionable year of my life thus far. because of the pandemic, i was forced out of the monotonous grind of everyday life. as a result, i had a great deal of time on my hands to reflect. i started out by pondering ways to better myself. david brooks outlines a similar method of character building in which adam ii is cultivated. “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin, out of which the others emerge. and you fight that sin, and you wrestle with that sin. and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed,” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). after identifying areas of personal and moral deficiency, i pushed this method of character building one step further by applying it to society. in a year of immense social turmoil, i wanted to understand how we got to where we were. i remain searching for that answer to this day. at notre dame, i’ve continued growing in spite of hardships. a few weeks ago, i was upset because i had gotten a b on an american politics paper that i had worked so hard on. this, combined with a notification that i was not selected to be in student government, sent me down a rabbit hole of self-doubt and impostor syndrome. two days after receiving this combination of unfortunate news, i watched carla harris’ speech for moreau. in her speech, carla said the exact words i needed to hear in that moment. “trust the power in you. don’t be distracted or deterred from any impostor syndrome. any moment where you find yourself, trust that the power within you has delivered you in perfect timing to that very moment,” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). once i received the prompt for my second american politics essay, i was determined to amend my writing process in hopes of getting an a. luckily, i was able to receive the grade i wanted on my second essay, and i might not have if not for the initial disappointment at receiving a b on my first essay. because i was raised in rural nebraska, i grew up in such a manner that i was not exposed to many people of different perspectives. most of the people i grew up interacting with were white, straight, working-class, and catholic. i had a single-minded and close-minded perspective on life; novelist chimamanda adichie might say that i had a single story of different people, places, and ideas. “the consequence of the single story is this: it robs people of dignity. it makes our recognition of our equal humanity difficult. it emphasizes how we are different rather than how we are similar,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). i first watched “the danger of a single story” in my junior english class in high school. it was part of our curriculum as we read the adventures of huckleberry finn. since then, i've been making a conscious effort to acknowledge implicit biases that i hold and challenging myself to dismantle those stereotypes. i revisited adichie’s ted talk last year when the black lives matter movement was at its height. i found it even more relevant and important than the first time i watched it. in fact, i thought it was so crucial to watch that i shared it with some of my family members. two weeks ago, in my god and the good life class, we learned that implicit bias caused by a lack of perspective can also be referred to as an epistemic bubble. an epistemic bubble is an information network from which relevant voices have been excluded by omission. after realizing that i was caught in one epistemic bubble for a long time, i began to doubt all of my beliefs if they were not informed by multiple perspectives. for example, i now have a rocky relationship with identifying as catholic. however, i am still open to faith and catholicism, which is why i enjoyed reading the religious perspectives of some other notre dame students. i even found one perspective that i relate to. “i have recently learned that even times of spiritual desolation can be perceived as gifts because they invite me to evaluate my life in its current state and trust ever more fully in the god who loves and cares for me even when i am unwilling or unable to remember it,” (“student reflections on faith” by cheyenne moreau fye week three). i hope my education at notre dame will help me to make informed decisions about my beliefs in god or religion so that i am able to decide what is true. this is one of the primary reasons i decided to register for god and the good life. i wanted to view religion from a philosophical perspective. after all, a primary point of philosophy is seeking the truth. on graduation day, i hope to finish college knowing that i found belonging, persevered despite incredible odds, and sought the truth. additionally, i have no doubt that i will gather more and more core beliefs along the way. through its education of mind and heart, i fully believe that notre dame will help me become the person i’m meant to be. 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? after reading over the syllabus, the objective “develop and pursue a vision of a life well-lived” really stood out to me as something relevant to my life. as a freshman, i have just arrived at college the place where everyone says that you find yourself and your passions. although i have a plan for what i would ideally like my life to look like, i am very interested in finding if this “vision” will be my true version of a “life well-lived”. another question that stood out to me was “how can i grow as my most authentic self?”. this question is really interesting to me as well. i am interested in finding my true self over these next few years and separating that from what others want me to be. 2) drawing from dr. brown’s commentary, submit a qqc reflection to prepare for in-class discussion. view the “qqc reflections” section of the syllabus for detailed guidance. q: why is it harder for some people to be vulnerable, whereas others are wide open about themselves and easily form deep connections? q: “shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection. is there something about me that if other people know it or see it, that i won’t be worthy of connection?” this quote represents the essence and meaning of what it means to be vulnerable around others. we often associate the idea of vulnerability with shame and secrets, and when we are vulnerable, we risk the idea that others might view us differently or judge us for what we have revealed. we often label this as shame, as we are ashamed to reveal the deepest parts of ourselves in an attempt of protection. as humans we crave and thrive off of connection with others. when we are vulnerable, we are risking this essential part of our lives and jeopardizing our “worthiness”. c: overall, i really enjoyed listening to this ted talk about what it means to be vulnerable and how to find connection through knowing your worth. i found it really interesting that people who have found a strong sense of belonging always believe they are loved and worthy, which separates them from the people who seek this connection. i really believe that this is true and that vulnerability requires the sacrifice of one’s comfort zone. you must extend yourself beyond the bounds you have created for yourself and dive head first into discomfort. if you trust and believe that you are loved and worthy, anyone who treats you differently after learning more about your inner self is not someone who you should seek to have in your life. vulnerability is crucial in forming lasting relationships and building true connections with the people in your life. personally, i sometimes struggle with opening myself up and leaning into discomfort, but this is a skill i consistently work to get better at and more comfortable with. essay dr. vanessa chan moreau fye 12 october 2021 connection, concessions, and contemplation: an examination of core beliefs what a person believes has an enormous impact on the identity of that individual. our core beliefs bleed into every aspect of our lives, from our education, to our interactions with others, to even our relationships with ourselves. for these reasons, it is extremely important to spend time examining not just why we believe what we believe, but also how those beliefs contribute to the mark that we leave on the world. as i have reflected on my own core beliefs, i’ve found that the way that i view and interact with the world is underlined by emphases on maintaining strong connections with others, the concession of personal faults for the purpose of growth, and the contemplation of past experiences as a means of defining identity. i believe that forming deep and meaningful connections is essential to the ability of an individual to thrive in any given environment. throughout my life, i have been fortunate enough to have been consistently surrounded by people with whom i share a deep sense of trust and love. the strong familial and platonic relationships that i was exposed to early in life have created an expectation for deep bonds in all my present and future relationships. however, the formation of such meaningful relationships is a process that is neither quick nor easy; it requires time, effort, and a mutual willingness to be seen. most often, the greatest roadblock to the creation of such connections is a reluctance to allow ourselves to be vulnerable. in my own life, my willingness to be vulnerable has frequently been challenged by the fear of feeling shame. a large fraction of my teenage years have been spent either combating bone cancer or dealing with the often frustrating aftermath of the disease. for much of this time, i aimed to avoid discussing my experiences at all costs, believing that, by doing so, i was preserving the image of myself that i wanted others to see. but what felt like self-preservation at the time was in actuality more synonymous with isolation. reflecting on my past actions, and discussing the importance of vulnerability in the context of the moreau curriculum, has given me the opportunity to name this fear for what it was: a fear of shame. as discussed in dr. brown’s commentary, humans have a common tendency to shy away from being vulnerable due to feelings of shame over their most personal experiences (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). in my case, this shame was born out of a fear of being seen differently, a fear that, if i shared the details of my experiences and my true feelings about these trials, then sympathy or pity would change the way that people would see me. now that i have become aware of the root cause of my reluctance to be vulnerable, i am more capable of avoiding the repetition of my past mistakes and i am more capable of building strong relationships in the future. however, vulnerability is not the only necessity for the formation of such connections. in order for a relationship to truly allow an individual to thrive, it must be healthy and mutually beneficial. throughout the fourth week of the moreau curriculum, i was able to engage in discussions and investigations of what it means for a relationship to be healthy. i believe one piece of content summarized this especially well, explaining that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4)”. having experienced mildly toxic friendships in my own past, i have learned the importance of being able to identify whether or not a relationship is actually beneficial. unhealthy relationships can be draining, frustrating, and can even cause significant harm, directly inhibiting the ability of either party to thrive or grow in any capacity. now that i am aware of strategies to identify such harmful associations, i can better avoid them in the future, thus giving myself the space and environment that i need in order to better myself. another core belief that i possess is the belief that, in order to grow as a person, there is a necessity to acknowledge my own faults and shortcomings. early on in the moreau curriculum, we were asked to take a survey that would identify our strengths and weaknesses in regard to our values and personalities. it was easy to feel pride in my strengths, which included love and hope and perspective, but it was more difficult to acknowledge the truth in my listed weaknesses: leadership and bravery. it’s difficult to draw a balance between self-acceptance and the pursuit of personal growth. as said in the commentary of david brooks, this struggle is largely because, in regards to our own faults, “we’re not taught in this culture how to wrestle with it, how to confront it, and how to combat it (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week 2)”. i think that this is a trend that is present in all aspects of life. we are so quick to find faults in others, but we are often blind when it comes time to see it in ourselves. additionally, when we do recognize our own flaws, we are often reluctant to put in the difficult work that is required to make changes to our habits. this belief is a more difficult pill to swallow, and it has taken me a great deal of time to truly accept what this requires, but as i am learning to adjust to the new environment of college, it is more clear to me than ever that the pursuit of self-growth is crucial in all avenues of life. we cannot make effective positive change in the world without first learning to make positive changes in our own day-to-day actions. one way we can all begin to acknowledge our faults is through education about implicit bias. the concept of implicit bias is one that was recently introduced to me, and it was a difficult realization to come to. we all would like to believe that we are good people, but sometimes unconscious generalizations can lead us to cause harm, which although unintentional, is harmful all the same. allowing these generalizations to persist keeps power out of the hands of these generalized populations, power that is “the ability not just to tell the story of another person, but to make it the definitive story of that person (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7)”. however, by beginning to become more aware of these generalizations, and by educating ourselves on a variety of perspectives, we can work to avoid doing more harm in the future. i also believe that we can use faith as a tool to better ourselves and to make a positive impact on the world. as i have reflected on the role that faith currently plays in my life, and the role that i would like it to grow into, i’ve decided that faith is most important to me as a tool with which i can better understand and serve the world around me. in the moreau content, one notre dame student, kyle, described a similar approach to faith as “a collective effort towards justice, an orientation towards solidarity, and a commitment to the common good. (“student reflections on faith” curated by campus ministry moreau fye week 3)”. we can use faith as a means of recognizing areas requiring growth in both our individual selves and the world as a whole. finally, i believe that i can most effectively pursue a strong sense of self when i spend time reflecting on my background. allowing myself to ruminate on past experiences, and to investigate how those experiences have contributed to my present habits and personality, has given me the ability to better understand my own thoughts and feelings. i think that the first part of this process is learning to view difficult past experiences in a more positive light, accepting past trials as opportunities for learning and growth as opposed to moments to be scorned. i have learned the importance of accepting that “there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c moreau fye week 5)”. when we develop the ability to find gratitude for past periods of strife, we are able to find more satisfaction and assurance in our present lives. in the future, i hope to keep this truth in mind as i encounter new and unexpected obstacles. it is also extremely beneficial to examine how positive parts of our past have shaped who we are today. through the activity of writing a poem about my own origins and background (based on “where i’m from” by geroge ella lyon moreau fye week 6), i was able to clearly recognize my own enduring values and identify formative moments of my past that contribute to my present self. upon rereading what i had written, i realized that all my most vivid childhood memories are of meaningful moments spent with family. additionally, the discussions that i had with my peers allowed us to examine commonalities between our values, many of us sharing an emphasis on family and images of familiar places. reflecting on my past has allowed me to be more confident as i have continued adjusting to new experiences and relationships in college, and i hope to continue to periodically reflect on my experiences as i continue my journey through life. smith 1 maria finan moreau fye 3 dec. 2021 the fastest semester ever my first semester here at notre dame could be characterized by speed. transitioning from a senior year that was corrupted by the covid-19 pandemic, i did not know what to expect. everything came at me head-first – the good and the bad. i got a normal college semester, full of both highs and lows. for that, i am grateful. it has come with surprises and challenges, and i believe that i am a better person than i was just this august. first, this semester has been a time of learning. in the classroom, i have gained a better awareness of my role in the world. i attribute this mostly to my introduction to global affairs and integral human development class. the class has exposed me to so much, and above all, it has helped me identify priorities and causes worthy of my attention. for example, i am not interested in addressing climate and health challenges that previously did not appear to me. additionally, my introduction to microeconomics class has allowed me to realize that i think like an economist. last year, i encountered the term marginal utility, but i did not really know where it came from. still, i adopted it to fit with my approach to the world; resources have more value in the hands of those with less. then, i learned about its roots in my class this semester. i have realized that i think and act like an economist and want to pursue economics as a major. i have also quickly learned that there are plenty of students here who are even smarter than me. i knew i was going to be surrounded by an intelligent student body, but i had perhaps too much confidence in myself. consequently, i have had to accept that my grades will be lower than in high school. people had told me this before, but i always thought i was different. yet, i am not different. so, these first few months have humbled me in ways that i needed. also, i have found that when i worry less about grades, i am able to maintain more peace of mind. on the topic of academics, i my coursework has been greater than i anticipated. it has been difficult to stay on top of work and maintain healthy practices like a solid sleep schedule. did i really expect to get to bed before 11pm every weeknight, like i did in high school? it seems crazy, now, that i did. but over the course of the semester, i have experimented with some solutions that allow me to get more rest and stay on top of academics. i am proud that i have managed to turn 1:30s into 12:30s on many nights. a key to that has been telling myself that an afternoon first class does not warrant an afternoon wake up. my sleep schedule is not perfect, but it is getting better. similarly, i have witnessed no dull moments this semester outside the classroom. it has been great in that i have enjoyed many things that i was excited about, like football games and syrs. meanwhile, there has been little time to take a break. even during my return trips home – for fall break and thanksgiving – i have had trouble relaxing as much as i had wanted. since august, i have been in a constant state of action. it has been difficult, but through exposing myself to so much, i have been able to grow and identify what is best for me specifically. maybe next semester i will not play three different interhall sports at once, but i would not have figured that out without doing it. on the other hand, i was too ambitious about some parts of social life. i guess i expected to make friends right off the bat who could be substitutes for my high school friends. similarly, i did not really appreciate my high school friends enough when i arrived here. as mentioned by the girl in week 9 video, emery, “the notion that my college friends should be stand-ins for my close relationships from home: impossible.” just a few months in now, i already agree with her. besides adjusting my perspective, i have decided to keep in touch with my friends from home more than i had initially planned to. it can be difficult to juggle that, but i have found it to be rewarding and worthwhile. for the most part, i did not expect to be exposed to so much just a few months in. early on, i often felt unprepared and unequipped to deal with certain situations. but i try to return to the view conveyed in the screwtape letters and look at my current setting through a broader lens. one line stood out to me in particular: “in his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks.” (week 12) this quote enunciates what i remind myself, which is that challenges are perfectly normal. when i consider how special notre dame is and remember that things will work out, i can become my best self. i remind myself that i should not opt out of my communities at notre dame when they are uncomfortably. if a community is malleable, “one stays in the crucible only if one is committed to being refined by fire.” (week 11) also, if i believe in this definition of a community, then i can improve it from within. but that starts with my own development. as fr. jenkins said, “if we were capable of reducing the hatred of others, we would already have done it.” (week 10) likewise, i cannot blame others for some negative aspects of our world. instead, i must look to myself and take some responsibility. that is why i am so grateful for these first few months. they have not been easy, but they have been necessary. i am eager to continue this growth in whatever ways god takes me here at notre dame going forward. vu 1 professor thigpen fys10101-97 3 december 2021 integration two being such a prestigious school, notre dame has so many smart people everywhere. even though we all made it here, we are constantly comparing ourselves to others since there is always someone smarter. this makes it hard to feel like we truly belong. my situation is unique since i was granted admission to notre dame through a different means than other students. i applied to the class of 2024 and was not accepted to notre dame. however, i was granted an opportunity through the nrotc preparatory program to spend one preparatory year at holy cross college and then transfer to notre dame as a freshman. in order to transfer, i had to meet the requirements of the program which included a 3.5 gpa and good standing in the notre dame nrotc unit. coming to notre dame, i often compare myself to students who received 35’s on the act and 5’s on all their ap tests. as elizabeth cox says in her video, skilled people comparing themselves to others can “spiral into feeling that they don’t deserve accolades and opportunities over other people” ("what is imposter syndrome?" by elizabeth cox – moreau fye week nine). while i am inevitably going to compare myself to them, this comparison should be to better myself rather than to look down upon myself. even if i did not do as well in high school as others, i worked just as hard to get into this prestigious university. therefore, i strive to be an example to those in less fortunate families who maybe did not have the money for act tutoring to yearn for greater education because it is possible through hard work and determination. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo vu 2 since we are all made in the image and likeness of god, there is inherent good in everyone. relating this to week nine, imposter syndrome has no effect when we focus on the good in ourselves and others. even the most broken people have good in themselves. everybody should be able to see this because, “the things they’ve experienced — the good, the bad, the ugly — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto – moreau fye week ten). taking this into account, i value the experiences i had during my preparatory year because they forged me into the student i am today. through the rigor i had to surpass, i was turned into a notre dame student, and therefore i belong here. kintsugi does a good job at showing this because people glue broken pottery with gold. this symbolizes that a broken person is even more beautiful when they are mended by their experiences. critical race theory is not such a big deal when we follow the teachings of the catholic church like the university does. treating everyone with respect and equality provides equal opportunity for all and brings the community together. for example, the wesley theological seminary commencement speech made me think of when pope saint john paul ii forgave the man who attempted to murder him. the points on conviction and hatred parallels the pope’s reason for forgiveness. there is no good in hatred, and through forgiveness, there is no need for conviction if the person is truly sorry. someone can be broken through their life experiences but fixing themselves comes when they learn to forgive themselves. everybody has different experiences because we all come from different backgrounds. whether it be race, gender, religion, etc., our differences are what make us unique. when these differences become a tool for hatred, there comes an issue. however, “patterned differences… are due to social, historical, political, economic, and experiential contexts and… are changeable” https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ vu 3 (“diversity matters!” by professor agustin fuentes). like the teachings of week ten, our differences should be glorified because they make us who we are. when we look at race as something that is not biological but rather as patterned differences, it shows that things rooted in hatred like implicit bias can be changed and should be. these attitudes do not glorify our differences, but rather pick at them and use them for ridicule. community is a gift and approaching it that way opens up more opportunities for everyone. we can see this when differences and vulnerabilities are not a factor. in the notre dame community, this is quite prevalent as the dining hall workers are quite diverse. notre dame does not care what race or how old they are as long as they can do their job. i love it when i go to the dining hall and see the sweet lady at the omelet station or hear the workers speaking vietnamese. notre dame not only does this in the dining halls, but i also see in the dorms. it always brightens up my mornings when i walk to class and see the sweet lady who cleans my dorm. she always wishes me a good day and that makes me smile. this is a true example of embracing community. when there is so much bad in the world, we must strive to be good in the face of evil. following in the footsteps of the holy cross priests, we must continue to strive for our goals even when facing trouble. “from its foundation in 1837, the congregation has faced a litany of crosses – financial crises, political unrest, religious persecution, deaths of religious from disease, natural disasters, and violence, and the waywardness of others” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james b. king, c.s.c.). the priests remained hopeful that they would be able to do their job as disciples of christ even when there was so much strife. similarly, we can think this way in regards to finals. even though we are going through so much stress, we must power through and finish what we started. in a way, we should follow in the footsteps of the https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28177/files/188503/download?download_frd=1 vu 4 holy cross priests since they endured so much to start this school, and therefore, we can endure the next few weeks of school. looking back at the teachings of week nine, we should remember that we truly belong here at notre dame and use that to motivate us to be scholars. week 13-integration albanese 1 moreau first year experience andrew whittington 3 december 2021 “the more that you learn, the more places you’ll go” -dr. seuss coming into notre dame, it was inevitable to have fears and doubts of the academic rigor and the overall overwhelming thought of starting a new journey in college. in week 9, we explored the topic of these insecurities and self doubts, along with the concept of imposter syndrome. recently, i had not done as well on my midterms as i had hoped, after studying for hours, i felt pretty down on myself and let myself be caught up in negative self-talk and doubt, and i let my insecurities come over me. i think it is important to recognize these feelings, but what is even more important is to remind ourselves that we have talent, are capable, and we belong, in order to keep pushing forward and overcome our insecurities and doubts. our talk as a class really helped to flesh out these inner feelings, and particularly i could tell that my peers and i found a sense of comfort in the fact that we were not alone with these thoughts. moving forward, we must confront these feelings head on, and not internalizing them is keyhaving discussions or seeking guidance is integral. i like to also keep the words in mind of elizabeth cox, “you have talent, you are capable, and you belong” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). reminding myself of these positive affirmations can help counteract inner doubt and insecuritiesbecause we were all accepted here for a reason and must remember that as we move through the next four years. an important question that was encountered in week 10 was, “what are the central challenges in my community and how do i respond?”. it is hard to pinpoint one central https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo albanese 2 challenge, but largely, polarization has been affecting our country as a whole and inturn, our community as well. the catholic and jesuit school communities, like ours, have felt polarization stemming from the debate over inserting critical race theory into curriculum or not. similarly, polarization can stem from a wide variety of social issues that have been plaguing our country and our communities. regardless of viewpoints, when tackling controversial and central issues such as these that can lead to polarization in communities, a way to respond to these disagreements is for each side to have patience with the other, “... we need more skill and wisdom in engaging those with other views” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by father john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). and like the japanese art, kintsugi, we can learn from it’s message that there is beauty in brokenness, because then there is hope. hope that you will emerge stronger. recently with former head football coach brian kelly abruptly leaving the program, now more than ever the community must come together as a whole to have faith that we will emerge stronger. our notre dame community and our country can seek to find comfort in the polarization of our people, as odd as that may sound, because there is hope for the future for us to come together. it will take effort from both parties, patience, open minds, collaboration, and more, but tackling these obstacles with this mindset will be the first step in the right direction. throughout my nd journey thus far, i have gained an even greater appreciation for diversity, and seen the importance of it in real time. in my hometown, and at my old high school, i can regrettably say that there was not a whole lot of diversity. coming to notre dame has allowed me to be exposed to people from all walks of life, and i would not have it any other way. something negative that may come from having so much diversity is the implicit bias, which we have touched on a few times this semester. i think that raising awareness of implicit bias is so https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/writings-addresses/2012-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ albanese 3 important, because people don’t even realize they have a subconscious bias, but it does not make it less harmful. i hope to visit the new klau center very soon, so i can be immersed in different stories and hear what others have gone through and have to say, because “the story of race has many voices” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven). the klau center is collecting the stories of all types of notre dame students, in order to create an even larger picture and story of race as a whole. i actually had the opportunity to meet the klau’s at their tailgate one football weekend, since a good friend of mine from home is family friends with them, and they were so welcoming and their love of notre dame was evident. the creation of the klau center seems to reign true with ideals they hold close to their hearts, which is so admirable. i will be certain to make a trip to their center, because i am eager to hear the stories of my notre dame family, which will help me, as well as many others, overcome such things such as implicit bias, and ultimately strengthen the bonds with those around us. how do i live and grow in hope? this is a question that doesn’t have a concrete answer, but one that i will be sure to keep in mind all throughout my notre dame journey. i have been put in so many situations in my life where i needed hope. hope may look different for every individual, but for me, it’s maintaining a positive outlook when faced with adversity or encountering a tough or trying time in my life. i also will turn to god in these situations, because he is a catalyst and beacon for my hope. for example, i had hope that i would be admitted to notre dame, after being deferred from restrictive early action to regular admission, and with a positive mindset and faith in god, this was able to come to fruition. in c.s. lewis’ screwtape letters, he puts himself in the shoes of the devil, and he recognizes that god needs his creation to have hope in times like i have mentioned, “it is during such trough periods, much more than https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ albanese 4 during peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” ( "the screwtape letters" chapter 8 by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). he is saying that during tough times or obstacles and setbacks, that is when humanity learns the most or grows the most, that is the integral point where they can overcome and get back up again. humans will need hope during tough times, more so than in “peaks” or good times. avoiding the demons, avoiding the temptations of evil to give up or give in by having hope and pushing through is how we are going to live and grow in hope. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486?wrap=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/files/189486?wrap=1 moreau integration the root of me 1. i believe that i can always improve 2. i believe that there is no higher power 3. i believe that i pursue truth by seeing all parts of the equation 4. i believe that i am responsible for my successes and my failures 5. i believe that i have my friends’ backs, and they have mine my first root belief is my most important root belief, and it is the one that i think of most often. in the last couple years, i have developed a strong focus on self-improvement. i try to always push myself to do better, and it has helped me focus on growth, instead of failures. with personal growth, it is much easier to find success. in the words of carla harris, “your authenticity is your distinct competitive advantage.” (notre dame commencement speech moreau week five). this root belief also ties in a focus on hope for the future. “hope is the confidence that we are moving toward light, not darkness; joy, not sorrow; life, not death.” (faith brings light to a dark world by david fagerberg moreau fye week three) with my eyes forward, i’ve been able to overcome challenges more easily knowing that there is always more to come so i can improve. if you only look towards the negatives, you will eventually find yourself focusing on the negatives instead of your destination. this is a belief that i put into action as much as i possibly can, and it directly influences my decisions often. my second root belief represents my lack of membership in a faith community. i was born and raised into a strong catholic family, with both sides of my family being fairly religious. although the catholic faith was heavily present throughout my life, i never felt interested in the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau beliefs i was being taught. today, i’m solidly not religious, although i have ended up at a catholic university anyway. although i do not believe in any religion, i have no problem with others that do, and i’m actually impressed with notre dame’s efforts. catholicism is offered and available, but it is not forced in any matter, which i greatly appreciate. this root belief is definitely not the strongest belief listed, but it does define part of the base of my beliefs. as such, it doesn’t directly influence my actions very often, but i find it to be an important piece of my foundation. my third root belief focuses on a characteristic of mine that i greatly value, judgement and decision-making. my strengths survey (via institute survey moreau fye week two) even gave my two greatest strengths as fairness and judgement. i will tend to act as a moderator in any debates/discussions between my friends, and they will look to me at times for judgement calls. i always want to see all sides of a debate/issue, just so that i can get a more unbiased view. for example, my boss at my summer job is very conservative, and we would have some debates over political issues, and it was interesting to see the different points we would bring up. i would always try to see his view, then compare it to my relatively more progressive views to find a middle ground between our beliefs. also, this example helped me see some issues with my judgement and improve upon it. there were a couple hot topics we talked about that challenged my thought processes, and it helped me realize that “many of us are more biased than we realize.” (how to think about ‘implicit bias’ by keith payne, laura niemi moreau week seven). linking #3 to #1, i want to continually improve upon my biases, and i’m happy to be corrected in order to develop myself. from my experience at notre dame so far, i’m glad to find that many traditional biases are not generally present, and i hope to use this environment to continue to challenge my own biases. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/keith-payne/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/author/laura-niemi/ my fourth root belief is focused on my sense of personal responsibility, which is fairly strong. when i have something that i have to do or am responsible for, i feel very strongly about it and will be dedicated to whatever task is involved. for example, i have a group project in my engineering design class right now, and i have been on top of my section of the project. at times, i wish others had more of this characteristic, because at times it feels like “there’s no discourse anymore, there’s no conversation. there’s just blame.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i take pride in my work and the product of said work, and this correlates to my sense of responsibility for my successes and failures. my fifth root belief focuses on my friendships. as i’ve talked about in earlier qqcs, my friends and i trust each other and communicate well. i will always do whatever i can do for them, because i know they will do the same for me. i’ve always liked having deeper, more meaningful relationships, and i feel that i maintain these relationships well. “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). now that i’m here at notre dame, i want to continue to build those kinds of friendships. during our week 6 discussion of the where i’m from poems, i noted that it was interesting to see how some people’s stories were instantly recognizable to me, while others were completely alien to me. i want to create friendships with a wider range of people, now that i’m in an environment with a more diverse range of people, in comparison to where i’ve lived in the past, which has been mostly homogeneous midwestern towns. i feel like i’ve already developed some strong relationships here in just half a semester, and i have a feeling they will only improve. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ i think that my root beliefs do well in describing a lot of what i believe and therefore who am i, or believe i am. within the last couple years, i’ve given a concentrated effort to improve myself, as discussed with root belief #1, and that has helped me greatly in nailing down these few beliefs to represent me. a couple years ago, i probably would not have been able to write a comparable set of beliefs, but today i can identify traits and beliefs in myself much more easily. stevenson ms. leis moreau first year experience 24 august 2021 week 1search for belonging 1) review the moreau fye fall 2021 syllabus. which of the focus questions or objectives stated in the document stand out to you as particularly relevant to your life? the objective that instantly stood out to me was “develop and pursue a vision of a life well lived.” one of the biggest reasons i came to notre dame was my experience with notre dame alumni. each person i conversed with had careers that were not only important, but served as a force for good in this world. that’s exactly what i want in my life. i want to contribute to a change in this world that lasts past my lifetime, and is for the better. i feel like with the resources and guidance and notre dame, this is not a far fetched goal. father jenkins’ speech at the football stadium during the welcome weekend really inspired me to try to become a kinder, more selfless person. i don’t want to just be another member of society; i want to be someone that is going to improve society for the better. after watching the events from the last couple of years unfold, i know our world needs kind and educated people more than ever. so, as a business major, i hope that i can contribute to a change in the way business is done in this country. all in all, i will push for a change in business that factors in catholic moral values i strive to live by. 2) q: what are some of the first steps society and our country could take to embrace vulnerability? q: “we numb vulnerability… we are the most in debt, obese, addicted, and medicated adult cohort in u.s. history.” i chose this quote because it opened my eyes to how vulnerability is currently affecting modern day society. her explanations of how strongly vulnerability connects to our other emotions really surprised me at first, but as the ted talk continued it began to make sense. our world is so equipped to suppress and hide our insecurities and imperfections, and it’s a problem. hiding one’s imperfections is like procrastinating. one must be able to face and accept their feelings of vulnerability and insecurity to truly love themselves. to truly be yourself, you have to let go of the person you think you should be. c: dr. brown’s exploration of the emotion of vulnerability fascinated me, as i felt like her conclusions really made sense to me. she found that it is literally necessary to have a feeling of vulnerability to be able to feel joy and compassion, and that these three go hand and hand. this seemed contradictory at first, but it made sense when i thought about it more. i have met many insecure people just from my high school experience, and they generally were not able to establish a strong connection with other people. in times that i feel vulnerable, i find that thinking about and trying to actively suppress this feeling makes it worse. when i fully accept and acknowledge my vulnerability, i tend to feel more relaxed and my mood improves. integration one fye catherine wagner moreau fye 15 october 2021 seeing me through my beliefs root belief #1: i believe that i cannot survive life without god and strong relationships. since i have been at notre dame, god’s presence in the world has become increasingly clear. from the mass at welcome weekend to mass in my dorm on sunday nights, i have been surrounded by demonstrations of faith. in this transition into college, i have also experienced the importance of relationships. leaving my family and friends that i have known my entire life and grown up with made me realize the importance of them. i did not appreciate how much they did for me and the extent to which i rely on them. without these people from my past, i do feel a little lost and alone. however, the people that i have met at notre dame have helped to fill this hole. i could not get through weeks of midterms, sickness, and the stress of college without them. after a long day of classes, eating with and seeing my friends always makes me smile. while the people i have met here can never replace my family and friends from home, i am very grateful for them and i understand that i could not thrive in college alone. further, i believe that my relationships with other people are dependent on my relationship with god. i think these people are all here for a reason and my ability to see them for who they are is based on how i can connect to god. god has given me everyone in my life, and the least that i can do is pray for these relationships. without god, i would not be here or have the people in my life to which i can turn. as father pete states, “at the core of oneself is the very presence of god” (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week three). humanity can try, but it can never separate itself from god because he is in everyone. i often think that i can succeed on my own, but i really cannot. my strength and opportunities are god given, and my friends and family give me the advice and encouragement needed. beyond my coming to this belief are the ways that i face it and notice it in my life at notre dame. as much as many of the students here are religious and have a strong faith life, they are also very dedicated to their studies. this commitment is very honorable and important on its own, but it can be taken too far. students often stay up all night studying. to me, this action seems like a denial of my belief. i think that we can only do so much on our own. at some point, we have to offer our struggles and worries up to god and trust that he will take care of us. he holds up our lives, and our thinking that we can survive without him is a false ideal. on the other hand, i have seen my belief in action in the positive effect people can have on each other. i see the ways that my friends bring joy to each other through small favors such as bringing them food, making them laugh, or sharing their clothes. friends build each other up, care for each other, and help one another to become better people: “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). relationships allow us to share our burdens and love with others, while also helping us to see our faults and ways we can improve. my relationships with others have allowed me to see the ways that i can be a better friend. i plan to grow by being a better listener to my friends. i often try to get my points across or tell a story without listening to what is going on in other’s lives. i want to be able to help my friends to the best of my ability, so i need to improve my listening skills. as we discussed in class, a healthy, productive environment is one where people listen to learn, not to respond. i can apply this classroom rule to my relationships and remember to turn to god and dedicate my joy in my relationships to him. root belief #2: i believe that i have room to grow. i love to try new things, so when i saw that notre dame has an ultimate frisbee team, i had to join. i have never played ultimate frisbee or anything similar to it before. when i showed up to the first practice, everyone on the team was so good. they could effortlessly throw the frisbee and understood the rules of the game perfectly. i immediately saw that i have a lot of room to improve and get better, but it will not be an easy process. likewise, moreau has also caused me to see that there are many ways i can work to be a better version of myself. however, this process is not easy: “you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). the process of becoming a better person takes more than just realizing that you can improve. it takes hard work, dedication, and sacrifices. this improvement will not come without its challenges, but it is worth it in the end. moreover, i have seen this belief get accepted and denied by students at notre dame. people often act like they are the best or show some sort of entitlement because of the prestige of attending this university. it can be easy to forget that there are ways that we can all improve. however, most students willingly admit to this belief. they go to office hours or tutoring, they ask their friends for help, and they set goals for themselves to improve. overcoming our root sins is difficult; it is much easier to just give in to the temptation. but i want to become a better person. i have made some progress towards this goal since i have been at notre dame by adapting better study and living habits than i had before. i also attend mass more frequently and consider the consequences of my actions more often. however, i still need to improve. specifically, moreau has inspired me to become more open to emotions and more open about myself: “the original definition [of courage] was to tell the story of who you are with your whole heart” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). before this class and our discussions, i thought that being vulnerable and showing who i truly am was weak. i thought that showing my emotions was not necessary and would not make me happier. however, i now realize that in order to truly be happy, i also have to let myself experience the bad times. i also see that each of us has a unique story to be told, and it is our duty to do so. while it may be challenging to show who we really are, it is necessary: “no one else sees the world as you do” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). each of our viewpoints and experiences can contribute something to someone else. by becoming more vulnerable, i can learn more about myself and also help others learn about themselves. i plan to allow myself to be more vulnerable and embrace the negative emotions so that i can grow. root belief #3: i believe that it is my duty to help others. since i have attended catholic school for most of my life, i have always been involved in service projects through my school and church. ever since, i have grown to love works of service as a way to put my faith into action. as i was saying in our one on one discussion, i feel my faith most strongly when i am serving my community. this belief was strengthened by the words of carla harris: “help anyone anyway anyhow you can simply because you can” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). because i have the means to assist others, it is my responsibility to do so. if i were not to use my gifts and opportunities for the good of others, it would be a selfish waste. whether through service trips or donations, no act of kindness is too small. humanity is interconnected and our lives are not separate, so it is my duty to make positive contributions to others if i am able. while each individual is unique, all of humanity has to work together: “this shared knowledge should help us discover a shared destiny and our shared affection for one another” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks moreau fye week seven). we all have the ability to affect one another for the better, and we are all united in god. notre dame provides an example of the ways that people can serve the community. each dorm’s contribution to those around us through charity events, such as the mr. nd pageant or mcglinn bubble soccer, are ways that my belief is shown to be affirmed and put into action. i have made progress in helping others through various projects that i have done, including habitat for humanity and feed my starving children. however, i can experience future growth by getting involved in more of the service events on campus. i also am striving to go on a service trip of some sort this summer because i have the time and the means to do so. by getting more involved in the community and searching out or planning new ways to help others, i can further live out my belief. chung 1 dr. vanessa chan moreau fye 3 december 2021 encountering, broadening, and developing new horizons coming to the university of notre dame, one thing that was incredibly heavily stressed was the cultivation of the mind, but never at the expense of the heart, a sentiment first expressed by one of the preeminent founders of the university, blessed basil moreau. i had heard this assertion countless times during online zoom calls for prospective students and once i had decided to attend, but i never truly understood what it meant. nor did i give it much contemplation, as it appeared to me as something that a university would mindlessly write in order to attract faith-oriented, but simultaneously academically driven students or parents who feared their children would lose sight of their faith in college. however, nearing the end of my first semester, i have come to learn that this concept is deeply ingrained in the life and culture of notre dame and has artfully shaped the first semester of my freshman year. like many students entering the first year of college at notre dame, i had not experienced significant academic failure throughout my education. thus, aware of the rigor and difficulty that was in my near future, i constantly wondered what it would feel like to experience my first failing grade or significant mistake in college and how i would cope with it. while hopeful that i would never encounter such a scenario, or that when i did, i would handle it with both perspective and grace, i was unsure of how i would react upon making a mistake. the connotation associated with mistakes is undoubtedly negative, as many people correlate mistakes with failure, regression, or embarrassment. however, hogan’s article opened my eyes to a new chung 2 concept that i had never thought of before, when she asked, “where did the belief come from that we can never make mistakes?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week nine). this question prompted me to think about how different classrooms, relationships, and the world would be if people felt more comfortable talking about their mistakes or insecurities. as a result of my notre dame journey thus far, i believe that the concept of mistakes and failures have decreased in importance. i no longer view mistakes as embarrassments, or things i must hide. when i have a question or make a mistake on an exam, i reach out to friends in the class or upperclassmen in my dorm in order to learn from the aforementioned “mistakes.” while i struggled to ever ask for help, even from teachers and adults, in high school, i plan to take advantage of the opportunity to learn from professors and teaching assistants in smaller settings in office hours next semester. as i am beginning to view asking questions as displaying initiative for learning rather than not knowing the answer by myself, i will use this new outlook to foster deeper learning and better understanding in my classes. i have realized that every single experience i have has benefitted me in a way, even if i struggle to see it at the time. late nights studying before the general chemistry exam on buffers and titrations has taught me that even when material is difficult, i am a rational person who can reason her way through a complex problem. it also provided me with a sense of solidarity and fostered friendships with people who i had known before. as palmer’s article asserted in week 11,“when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune. but when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer – moreau fye https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ chung 3 week twelve). through the difficulties and moments in which i fear that i will fail or make a mistake, i have come to recognize my need for community and others. i often find myself in a very similar situation, attributing my successes in school to my drive or successes outside of school to dedication or practice. however, when i encounter a setback or difficulty, i am continuously reminded that others can provide me with support or help me when i am not capable of performing a task myself. i used to pride myself on being an independent person, believing that independence was synonymous with never asking for help or leaning on others. however, i have come to realize that relying on community for support and encouragement is not a sign of unhealthy dependence, but a way to grow. especially during times of emotional difficulties, similar to the uncomfortable and racist encounters mentioned in the klau center archive of race video from week 11, i have come to seek comfort and community from others, whether they are of my race or not. palmer’s insight into the necessity of community, particularly during strife, is an important reminder that we need people all the time, even when we think we do not. i have also come to understand the role that religion plays for me in persevering through difficulties. attending catholic school since kindergarten, i had always heard that god does not place people in situations that they could not handle. and while that seemed intuitive, i never truly understood it, as i had seen my family endure many difficulties, such as my grandmother’s death two years ago this fall. however, learning in week 12 that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future. . .” (“hopeholy cross and christian education” by father james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve) clarified an important truth for me. during times of adversity, situations can quickly become overwhelming, and i often find myself https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465?module_item_id=104241 chung 4 questioning why i must endure such difficulties. i often seek to place blame on myself or others and desire for ease rather than difficulty. however, this quote reminds me that god does not place people in situations they cannot handle. god enables us to become stronger and more prepared individuals by persevering through difficulties and garnering life lessons and skills. while said ironically in the screwtape letters, it is true that, “he wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). while screwtape describes this to his nephew as a negative aspect of god, whom he refers to as “the enemy” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve), this is one of god’s greatest gifts to us. he challenges us, but he wants us to succeed and grow. god provides us with tenuous situations in order to push us to be our best selves and he only seeks for us to give our best. additionally in contemplating the role that my faith plays in my acceptance of mistakes in the pursuit of growth, i have come to appreciate how innately intertwined community and faith are. each sunday, i look forward to the opportunity to attend mass in my dorm at 9:00 as in this community i feel surrounded by people who are in similar situations to myself. while we all attend difficult classes and undoubtedly struggle through certain situations, when we come together and go to the snack shack after mass, i feel bonded to the girls in my dorm as well as god. this new understanding encouraged me to get involved in the service and faith aspects of my dorm, serving as a commissioner-in-training to organize tutoring at st. adalbert’s catholic school in south bend and bake for the snack shack every sunday as way to foster community after mass and fundraise for st. adalbert. additionally, next semester, i plan to get more involved in campus ministry as i appreciate the community and refuge that recognizing god’s role in our lives can provide. as a result of my notre dame https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?module_item_id=104246 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187491?module_item_id=104246 chung 5 journey i have come to realize that instances in which i think i may encounter failure or make a mistake are not debilitating, rather i can use them to grow and learn. learning from my experiences is something that has also become increasingly important to me since arriving at notre dame because i know the privilege i have to be in such a unique environment. not only is notre dame academically inclined, but the school is determined to create an environment in which all students feel comfortable and safe. as father jenkins described in his commencement speech, the world of today is a broken place full of hatred, malice, division, and unjust convictions. he asserted that “we in this country are in the midst of a social crisis, a harsh and deepening split between groups that are all too ready to see evil in each other” (“wesley theological 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). while very disheartening, this sentiment addresses the truth of our world today. whether in politics or even on campus in small-scale arguments or debates, people tend to take sides and ardently stick to their side, regardless of how convincing the other side may be. as a very opinionated person, i used to have a very difficult time rationalizing other individual’s opinions and while i respected that others would have different beliefs than i did, i tended to surround myself with those who had similar beliefs to me, as it seemed more sensible to me. this mode of behaving allowed me to feel more comfortable expressing my true thoughts in front of my friends, but at notre dame i have come to see that interacting with people of different beliefs is inevitable and, while not always pleasant or easy, it is beneficial. like the catholic “both/and” approach we discussed in week 10, i have begun to work to integrate ideas that are my own and ones that challenge my own beliefs in order to create the fairest and best solutions to any problems i encounter. the notre dame campus ministry booklet from week 12 described how when we learn to see something through a new perspective, we must undergo a https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104210 chung 6 “conversion of both heart and mind” (“hopeholy cross and christian education” by father james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). the booklet asserts that we must branch out of our comfort zones while simultaneously maintaining hope that our questions will result in a newfound and improved understanding of the world and our place in it. living in constant proximity to people that i disagree with on political and personal beliefs initially seemed like it would be a very difficult concept for me, as in the past i have sought to avoid instances that might result in conflict. however, my understanding of disagreement is more nuanced now and i realize that it can force me to exist outside of my comfort zone, reevaluate my opinions, seek to understand others better, or even strengthen my beliefs when i must explain them to others. while undoubtedly one of the most challenging and new experiences i have ever endured, my first semester of college has provided me with myriad lessons and observations that i am certain will benefit me in the future. i have a more definitive understanding of the importance of community and faith in my life, a nuanced understanding of conflict and disagreement, and recognize how each instance since august has helped me grow closer to being the determined, gracious, understanding, and confident individual that i seek to become over the next four years. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465?module_item_id=104241 microsoft word moreau integration 2 united through love throughout the past several weeks, i have developed a stronger understanding of community and what it means to truly love one another. i have gained greater clarity about what it means to be connected and united through shared compassion. at the beginning of the semester, i questioned what exactly makes up a community and what role the individual plays in a community. i now understand that community is something that celebrates the uniqueness and diversity of everyone, and “begins not externally, but in the recesses of the human heart” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). prior towards this revelation, i had the impression that community was a concept solely relating to groups of people and relationships, but i have learned that “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as a capacity for connectedness” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). encountering this wisdom has allowed me to take a greater look into myself and evaluate patterns inhibiting this capacity for connectedness such as implicit biases. i have also been able to gain greater clarity on my personal strengths, and how i can use them to connect with others. moreover, analyzing my personal role in a community has made me evaluate my imperfections. although i often view certain characteristics of myself in a negative light, the concept of kintsugi introduced by kristen helgeson (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten) has introduced me to a new way of thinking. instead of viewing aspects of my identity as flaws or imperfections i can view them as something that makes me unique and special. i can use these differences to connect with others and develop deeper relationships. furthermore, each person’s unique trials and experiences allows for empathy towards others, which is a key factor in a strong community. i also gained greater understanding of the importance of communication in a community. often, we believe we are alone in something, only to find out there is a whole community of people who feel or believe the same thing. this scenario is perpetuated by pluralistic ignorance in which “we each doubt ourselves privately but believe we are alone in thinking that way because no one else voices their doubts” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). although it takes immense courage to voice our true emotions and ideologies, it can make a significant difference in our feelings of worthiness and connection. i am striving to reduce my personal pluralistic ignorance by being more vulnerable with others and by building connections built on trust and openness. i also hope to reduce the pluralistic ignorance of others by being an empathetic listener and a source of kindness. i have found that having deeper conversations with other people can be very liberating and allows for greater connection and unity. community is also derived from compassion and love for all regardless of differences, and i have discovered more about celebrating diversity and broadening my perspective to learn about different walks of life. as catholic social teaching suggests, we are all made in the image of god and deserve dignity and respect. catholic social teaching also stresses that “love is the greatest commandment and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins; hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society-our ability to see danger, come together, and take action.” (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” by christopher j. devron, s.j. moreau fye week ten). this quote emphasizes the importance taking a firm stance against any hatred in our world since hatred is the greatest hindrance to community. to respond, we must stand up for the rights of all and examine race through critical theory and through appeals to our common humanity. to decrease the hate in our world, it is important to actively examine systemic oppression and take strong action to change these issues. we each have the responsibility to respond to oppression and one concrete step i plan on taking, is partaking in activities and guest lecturers that address issues of equity and inclusion, in order to better educate myself on how i can appreciate and care for those around me. although this may not solve all the hatred in the world, if we each make a strong effort towards bettering ourselves and those around us, we can profoundly impact the systems around us. it is up to each as the individual to choose to build strong communities and to make a positive difference in the world. strong communities are built on love, respect for others, trust, and compassion. it is essential to have communication, compassionate leadership, humility, and faith when striving to connect with others and unite people. this is definitely not something that is easy to do, and it does take dedication and strength. ultimately it is up to ourselves to choose love and let god guide us towards this. the “screwtape letters” profoundly demonstrate how we must be deliberate in our faith and in seeking out god’s way. although god’s capacity for love is immensely powerful, he also gave us freewill. therefore, we must deliberately seek out ways to live out our life in the footsteps of god. having the perspective of the devil through the “screwtape letters” reveals how the devil drags people down through temptations and vice (“the screwtape letters chapter 8” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). one powerful way to respond to this is through an education. through a catholic education, i can become closer to god by growing in knowledge of the world around me and having appreciation for the wonder of it all. being at notre dame allows me to grow in my faith and encounter god through my coursework. it also allows me to grow in community with others through faith. from attending campus ministry events to dorm masses, i can grow closer to my god and my peers. furthermore, notre dame education has allowed me to develop my leadership skills, and as parker j. palmer discusses, community requires leadership and people who can create a trustworthy space and guide others (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). being part of clubs and volunteering organizations has shown me how to lead by example, and i hope to utilize the leadership skills i have learned thus far to empower others and unite those around me. making it to the other end of the sea i still felt somewhat uneasy about leaving my country and flying across the vast atlantic ocean to study at notre dame after i confirmed my admission offer. in june, as i randomly browsed the webpage of first year advising faqs, one answer about concerns of academic rigor suddenly caught my attention: it said that it is not unusual to feel worried, but i have already proved with my admission to notre dame that i belong here. this relieved my anxiety to some extent, as it made much sense, but still, i was not 100% confident that i’m good enough to succeed at this prestigious institution. from the energetic welcome event planned by senior students at my residence hall to welcome speeches by international student admission officers to the speech by fr. jenkins at the official welcome to moreau discussions and tours, i was deeply inspired and my anxiety of crossing half of the globe to study at an unfamiliar place gradually reduced as i learned more about the university in which i was then immersed in. the warm and welcoming peers and faculty (and squirrels and chipmucks maybe) at notre dame assured me more and more deeply that it is not simply a place to complete my undergraduate studies, but a place i can call home, and the place i belong. “the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and belonging.” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one)1 i realized that my uneasiness was because i was afraid that i might not be good enough to succeed among so many well-accomplished peers, but i now possess the sense of 1 youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be love and belonging, and believe that i am worthy of love and belonging at my new home notre dame. for example, when i face academic challenges, i do not doubt my ability or whether i actually belong here, but i actively seek resources like professors’ office hours, academic advisors, peer tutoring, etc. to overcome the challenges. as carla harris said in her speech, “fear is just false evidence of things appearing real.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five)2 i no longer doubt myself because of fear but am well assured of my belonging here. i know i will definitely face challenges at this new place and new chapter of my life, but i am not afraid to tackle them because i know the process of overcoming challenges will equip me with more experience and skills, which will then help me make more accomplishments in the path forward. my second root belief is that i believe my authenticity is valuable and i need not be pressured to fake another persona; i want to stay genuine to myself. my personality is not quite that of a social butterfly, but i have my strengths such as humor and sincerity which earned me good friends and a close community in which i enjoy through fun and healthy interactions. healthy relationships are identified by comfort, respect, humor, honesty, safety, etc. (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four)3 faking a very social persona probably will give me more exposure in interpersonal relationships but at the mean time makes me have 2 youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4&t=390s 3 static1.squarespace.com/static/54da632be4b0c3a7f3a8a90d/t/55689339e4b0d6fc6b6e2f28/1432916793921/ healthy+vs+unhealthy.pdf https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be less comfort and mentally exhausted, but i am happy with who i am and what i am achieving and accomplishing under the real me. “eulogy virtues are deeper; who are you, in your depth; what is the nature of your relationships, are you bold, loving, dependable, consistent?” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two)4 some virtues are considered advantageous for a high status in society, for example, with resume virtues, my chances of succeeding in the job market will increase and i can make a decent living on my own; nevertheless, i will never neglect my mental well-being and always keep my eulogy virtues, so that i will feel comfortable and contented with a rewarding and fulfilling life. however, it does not mean that i always want to stay in my comfort zone, which leads to my third root belief about my faith: i believe that it is important for me to grow by staying curious and always learning. “physical lighting can serve as a metaphor for spiritual lighting. when the lighting changes, what i can see changes.” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three)5 everyone needs their particular lighting as the north star in their life, and the lighting in my life is learning from different people and new experiences. i tried many new things at notre dame: i applied to clubs in areas in which i’ve never been, such as business; i initiated conversations with people i don’t know; i opened a bank account on my own; i overcame the nerve to go to professors’ office hours to discuss my papers which did not 4 youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim 5 grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-darkworld/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be receive a quite good-looking grade; i tried mexican, indian, and brazilian new food, etc. these experiences all helped me construct a set of varied and diverse values and an evolving understanding of the world through different stories, challenge preconceptions i may have. as chimamanda adichie said, “when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise.” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven)6 the past two months at notre dame have brought me numerous new experiences, and i want to experience many more new things in the future so that i can reach beyond what i am already familiar with, through which i will shape and reshape a more sophisticated understanding of the world. so, i’ve made it to here, to the other end of the atlantic ocean. i will always remember where i’m from: i’m from the night breeze along the huangpu river, from sweet and sour ribs my grandmother made, from the array of potted plants at my family’s balcony. (“where i’m from” moreau fye week six)7 i carry on these memories and heritage with me, embarking on and embracing the many exciting and unpredictable journeys at the other end of the sea. 6 ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story 7 georgeellalyon.com/where.html moreau first experience course professor pruitt 15 october 2021 the power of equality i believe that people of color should have more representation in our society because as a black woman who has grown up with the media the lack of people who looked like me not only gave me a lost sense of self but took me longer to be educated, and i can say the same for others. having that representation can shape a person of color’s story in a helpful way for them to succeed. some things that hinder this from happening are the unrealistic standards of beauty and intelligence in our society being shown as only caucasians fitting this standard in the media, in magazines, and on social media. therefore, i pride myself in always reposting the good in the people of color community, i tell the stories of black people before us to my brothers and commit to showing little kids books and tv shows that have people that look like them so they can believe that they can truly be who they set their minds to be. in week 7 of moreau, i had the honor of listening to chimamanda adichie’s ted talk “the danger of a single story” where she speaks on the different ways the lack of african and poor representation ruined her perception of life. she wrote stories about white people because she never saw africans in literature, she believed her helper fide wasn’t capable of being anything but poor, and her college roommate assumed the worst about her based on a preconceived notion of africa. all of these examples are because both adichie and her roommate were ignorant to situations that weren’t theirs. after all, they had never been exposed to them. (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven) likewise, week 5 touches on the importance of stories and how they too can shape our futures. according to father kevin grove, “[ moreau ] called an education, and i’ve never heard someone else use this formulation, an education, a work of the resurrection…. a work of life out of death.” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove moreau fye week five) in this connection the importance of moreau is shown and how it can positively affect the lives of students because we all share our stories and learn from them. i believe that protecting people of color, especially black people, even more especially people of color who are a part of the lgbtq+ community. in this case, i have come to believe this because i have seen firsthand the effects that racism, homophobia, and discrimination have had on individuals, families, and communities. this belief is being challenged every day, from the police brutality crimes that have intensified since 2020 to hate crimes for those a part of the lgbtq+ community. there are countless examples of safety being compromised because of one attribute that an individual holds. my actions in regards to this are speaking up, going to protest, signing petitions, and being an active voice in the community and the media. during week 6, i wrote a poem on “where i’m from” in this piece i said, “where im from is a reflection of what i want to do. where im from is a reflection of what i plan to change...for the trayvon martins. the emmett tills. or any black man that just wanted to chill. for the eric garners. the botham jeans. or any black man that just wanted to eat his ice cream.” here i have shown examples of people of color who have not been protected and suffered from it. according to george ella lyon, where i’m from can be “an important event could open into freewriting all the memories of that experience, then writing it as a scene, with description and dialogue. it's also possible to let the description become setting and directions and let the dialogue turn into a play.” (“where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) showing that where i’m from can be a reflection of the things i want to change in the world. as a subtopic, i also strongly believe in the protection of women. many evils have been formed against women, there has never been a just society but women were always inferior to men in every aspect. protecting women is allowing them to move up in the workplace, make the same pay as men, and be seen as just as capable. there is also the definite of protecting women from rapists, from being catcalled, from rejection murders, from being taken advantage of at a party, and so many more threats that are brought to their lives. this can only happen when men no longer feel a sense of superiority over women, as long as that feeling of power is embedded in the minds of men the belief that they can do and say anything they want to women will forever continue. i work on this from a standpoint of a woman, with two younger brothers. i teach them to respect women, to understand that women are capable of thinking for themselves and that they never need to convince a woman to do anything. i want them to know that women are their equals, not their inferiors. lastly, i believe that relationships are the foundations of a healthy, both mentally, and emotionally, life. relationships with one’s self, relationships with others, and the relationship built with the reality around you. usually, an individual will believe that they can survive on their own but that is completely untrue. humans are relational beings, we need to create relationships with others, our environments, and ourselves to flourish. this influences me to work on stepping out of my comfort zone and creating relationships with others. sometimes relationships aren’t always going to be perfect and happy, there will always be ones that are toxic and you learn from those how to acknowledge them and you learn your worth and what you accept for yourself. in week 4 of moreau, we touched on relationships with others and how to address them healthily and be understanding of the signs of toxic ones. one quote that i believe was helpful was “direct. delegate. distract.” (“it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" moreau fye week four) if the relationship calls for it, be direct with the person and let them know that you no longer feel valued in the relationship and express that for your betterment as a person that you need to leave. if the relationship is not that approachable delegate, find someone that can help you successfully leave that relationship without further conflict. or lastly, is highly toxic and abusive relationships, distract your partner to get out successfully and safely. likewise in week 2, the relationship without self was explained by taking a via character strength survey. this survey allowed me to learned new what my strengths and weaknesses were without the bias of what i wanted them to be. according to the survey they intend to “increase happiness and well-being. find meaning and purpose. boost relationships. manage stress and health. accomplish goals.” (“via character strengths survey (via adult survey)” moreau fye week two) this website allows for the deepening of understanding within yourself. similarly, in week 3 we also built upon our self-knowledge. “when the light changes, what i can see changes. when my spiritual light changes, what i can see spiritually changes.” (​​“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three) after reading prof. fagerberg’s article i began to analyze how my perspective on a situation can affect the way i react to such situations. for example, “when the light changes, what i can see changes” showed me that in a new environment i see myself as less than what i am truly capable of. during my first week at notre dame, i questioned my presence, ‘was i smart enough’ ‘could i play soccer at such a high level’ ‘did i have what it takes to succeed’ ‘what would hold me back from being my best self.” all of these questions were thoughts that constantly roamed through my mind until the ‘light changed’ and i began to see myself as qualified because if i wasn’t then i wouldn't have gotten in, and that is the mindset i try to keep. lastly, during week 1, after reading the syllabus i found something that spoke to me, and it stated deepen your self-knowledge.” this quote spoke to me a lot differently than the others. i picked this one specific objective because it can be interpreted differently for each person. there is no one way of deepening your self-knowledge. however, for me, a lot of my life experiences have taught me to adapt to my surroundings to succeed, by fitting in. i never wanted to draw too much attention to myself but i am not the kind of person who hides in the shadows. although i know myself and my values sometimes i lose sight of both of those very important attributes to fit in, in my new environment. this is also connected to “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown because in understanding who i am i have learned to be vulnerable with others in my journey to better myself and what i am capable of. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) qqc week 1 question: why is vulnerability often related to weakness? quote: “and i’m more ‘life is messy, clean it up, organize it, and put it into a bento box”. i relate so much to this comment made by brené brown because i consider myself a perfectionist and a person that wants to have control over everything that is going on in their life. this is something that i’ve working on for a time now, and i strongly belief that once i started changing my mindset and perspective about being vulnerable has gotten me where i’m today. also, i chose this quote because i believe that is a very common mindset in our society. almost everybody is looking to be perfect, have control over everything, and always show strength. however, as brené brown said, people that showed vulnerability and a sense of worthiness in her research, “..had the courage to be imperfect”. which, in my opinion, should be the mindset that society teaches and encourages future generations. creating more empathetic, compassionate, and stronger people. comment: now that i’m initiating this new adventure in college, far away from home, it is a great opportunity for me to continue growing in my vulnerability and being grateful everyday even for the little things. being vulnerable will not only allow me to connect better with myself, but to create better and meaningful relationships with others too. also, allowing myself to be vulnerable will help me find out what i’m really passionate about, and how i can make an impact in the life of others through my career choice. to conclude, letting yourself be vulnerable is a sign of strength and is the key to create good connections, have empathy, and live a life with more gratitude. reference video “the power of vulnerability” by brené brown, tedxhouston moreau integration two kevin mccarthy kevin mccarthy moreau integration two thigpen 28 november 2021 experiences at the university of notre dame the past few months have flown by. i have met new people, done new things, and i really feel as if i have had the opportunity to come into my own. being in a new environment for such an extended period of time has allowed me to focus on myself as well as learn how to live with and be around people who aren’t my immediate family. the opportunity to encounter new things and become the man i know i can become is something that i wouldn’t trade for the world, and i cannot wait to continue this journey. in being at the university of notre dame, there are certain pressures that can be felt by all students. notre dame is such an academically demanding school, and it is a fact that there are certain standards that need to be met and surpassed here. back home in little silver, i was a straight a student. in middle school, i was the top of my class. in highschool, i was the top of my class. failing a test or getting a bad grade was not something that happened to me frequently. along with this, i had developed a reputation amongst my friends and even their parents as the “smart kid”. obviously this is not something to be ashamed of, and i was proud to be known as a smart kid. however, the expectations to always succeed sometimes weighed on my mind. before notre dame, i was quite hard on myself and demanded a certain level of success. however, i have since learned that “not only are these expectations [of great success] arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on [me],” i cannot live my life according to the expectations of others (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” moreau fye week 9). this lesson is https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau something that i have learned very quickly here at notre dame. i cannot live for anyone aside from myself. the only opinion that truly matters is my own. that is not to say i can just give up and fail all of my courses however. it is still important to give my best effort at all times, and even though i’ll come up short more often than not, i need to learn from my mistakes and continue on. on a day to day basis, i encounter all types of things. i encounter something as simple as different types of weather or i can encounter complex situations. in being at the university of notre dame, i have truly encountered what one would call a community. there is a sense of brotherhood in my dorm, even though none of us are blood related. everyone i have encountered thus far is always willing to help regardless of who you are, what you believe, or what you may look like. however, this is sadly not the case in many parts of america, and even the world. it can be quite obvious that “the danger is all around us now” as “hatred is rising, [but] all sides feel more virtuous,” however many still do not notice this major threat (wesley theological seminary commencement moreau fye week 10). being in such a sheltered environment at notre dame, this sad reality is often easy to forget. when i return home and travel outside of campus, hatred is clearly prevalent on a day to day basis. over the course of thanksgiving break, i was hanging out with old friends, and a political discussion arose. i tried to not get involved, but two of my oldest friends got into a full fledged argument because their opinions were on opposite sides of the spectrum. these were two people who had been friends for life, yet they seemed as if they hated each other. this felt totally wrong, yet neither of them were willing to concede nor agree to disagree. in being at notre dame, i have seen the importance of listening to peers, even if you have a different perspective than them. if there is a lack of willingness to work together as a whole, nothing good can ever be accomplished. a true community is one that https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ agrees to disagree, but can still come together for the greater good of our society. we have to collectively learn to be less arrogant and dismiss our selfish personal needs for the betterment of society. even though it is important to have a sense of community, it is a necessity that it is not forced upon anyone. the notion of community was once pretty black and white for me. i had previously believed that people lived harmoniously together, or they did not. community to me was a group of people who actively collaborated and collectively tried to better the world around them. i was naive in my thinking that a community could be forced onto certain individuals and everyone can come together. however, “when we try to ‘make community happen,’ driven by desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks… we will exhaust ourselves and alienate each other, snapping the connections we yearn for” (thirteen ways of looking at community moreau fye week 11). before coming to notre dame, i personally had never considered the fact that trying so hard to create a community may in turn have an adverse effect and create disdain. i personally felt as if a community can be formulated by individuals who are willing to try hard enough to do so, but apparently it can be considered something that we can “relax” into. the more i think about it, the more it makes sense. whenever my parents assign me chores, something arises in me and i do not want to do them at all. however, if i see the dishes piling up in the sink, i will feel the urge to clean them even though no one instructed me to. i’m not sure exactly why i am like this, but this is probably true for many people. it is an important individual choice to become part of a community and do good for the betterment of others. everyday i wake up knowing that if i make any mistakes, i will always have tomorrow to right my wrongs. this is a small part of hope. in my eyes, hope is an optimistic feeling for the http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ future, and hope can be characterized as something you give yourself when you feel upset. hope was once something that was quite ambiguous to me, but my time at notre dame has helped me develop a more clear understanding of what it truly is. i can never truly define hope, as everyone has their own interpretations of what the word means. something that has become quite clear to me is that “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” and we need to have “hope in that process to stick with it” as it “will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world” (“holy cross and christian education” moreau fye week 12). this is a crucial factor of learning that tends to be overlooked, and often this is not associated with hope either. in order for someone to learn something new, they often have to make a mistake or do something wrong in the first place. the first chemistry quiz i took at notre dame was absolutely atrocious. i bombed it and barely passed getting a 65%. even though i was initially dismayed, this was a valuable learning experience. notre dame is not highschool, and i could not cram in a few week’s worth of lectures into one night. now, i study for days leading up to the exam or quiz and each week i progressively score better. this can be analogous to other real world situations. i have to be open minded, i have to challenge myself and my preconceived beliefs in order for me to become an even better person. hope and growth are codependent, and there is no room for learning if i do not allow myself to fail. the experiences i have had at the university of notre dame have been outstanding. these experiences are unmatched by the experiences my friends tell me about, and i wouldn’t trade them for anything. i have learned so much about myself in this first semester, and i look forward to growing into my fullest potential here. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ moreau integration one andy de la garza 10/15/2021 the start of my story like many others who began their college journey in late august, i came to the university of notre dame excited for the future, but also nervous for the new experience. how would i fit into the community? would i be able to make new friends? would i be able to adjust to campus life and classes quickly? questions like these rushed through my head, only making me more anxious for the upcoming semester. however, as soon as i stepped onto campus, i felt embraced by the notre dame community, and have not looked back. now coming up on the half-way point of my first semester, i have already learned many important lessons. my brief time at notre dame has led me to believe that there is a value in listening to the stories of others. growing up in san antonio and going to a small private school, i felt as if i was always surrounded by family. my graduating class in high school was twenty-eight people, many of which i had known since a young age. growing up in this bubble made it difficult to think about people who grew up in different environments. however, after arriving on campus at the university of notre dame, i was immediately met by people from across the world. from those who grew up in rural indiana to brazil, there is a wide variety of experiences and backgrounds present on our campus. getting to know people from different backgrounds has been very rewarding, and hearing about the contrasting experiences of my peers has widened my view of education and family life. similarly to the concept of the “where i’m from” poem, i have been able to hear from a “diversity of… voices” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). every individual has their own story of his or her individual upbringing, and by listening to the experiences of others, we learn more about our world. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html getting to know about the lives of my peers has also been an important aspect of making friends. it takes a certain vulnerability to share one’s home experiences, so opening up about personal life at home has allowed me to form many friendships on campus. while it is not always easy to share these experiences, brene brown’s description of vulnerability shows its significance: “and i know that vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness, but it appears that it is also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, of love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). while certain elements of our personal life and upbringing may weigh heavily on us, by opening up to others and sharing our experiences, we are able to understand each other better and create lasting relationships. listening to others also allows us to find out the goals and values of others. in his ted discussion, david brooks describes the two sides of human nature: adam 1, “the ambitious side of our nature” and adam 2 “the humble side of our nature” (“should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). by listening to people’s stories, whether about their upbringings or hobbies, we learn more about the values they hold. at the university of notre dame, i have met people with a variety of interests and qualities. from choir singers to collegiate athletes, there are people with a variety of attributes and goals at notre dame. however, even though many individuals have ambitions, or strong adam 1 virtues, they also have a strong connection to faith and personal growth, or the adam 2 virtues. the balance that students are able to find on this campus has motivated me to pursue my interests and personal growth, and had i not listened to the stories of others, i may not have the motivation. as previously addressed, forming relationships was a part of my college experience that i was both excited and nervous for. however, through learning to listen to others’ stories, i feel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim that i have been able to form strong relationships with many new friends. listening to others is an important step in forming relationships: “a good friend should never make you feel like the things you’re saying are unimportant and uninteresting” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia taylor moreau fye week three). as stated by olivia taylor, we risk making others feel unimportant by not listening to their stories. listening to stories can also teach us important lessons. for instance, clara harris shares her success and story, through her “pearls,” or pieces of advice she has picked up throughout her life, such as learning to be more confident in herself (“notre dame commencement 2021: laetare medalist address” by clara harris moreau fye week five). if we want others to listen to and respect our stories, we have to be willing to listen to theirs, and we may even be able to learn from their stories. when we do not listen to the stories of others, we also risk appearing ignorant or insensitive. it is important to hear a person’s entire story before passing judgement, as to not draw false conclusions: “the single story creates stereotypes and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). we make false judgements and accusations of people when we do not listen to their complete stories. as individuals, we do not like to be judged, much less incorrectly, so we should give others the respect of hearing their complete stories before drawing conclusions. in addition to listening to others’ stories, it is important to create a framework for our own stories: “the greatest journey you will ever go on is a journey of self discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week four). echoing fr. pete’s statement, i still feel that i have a lot to learn about myself, and i cannot wait to discover more of my interests and passions at the university of notre dame. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois stories have the ability to touch us and teach us more about those around us and ourselves. i look forward to learning about more people on campus through listening to their stories. however, i am even more excited about becoming my own person and creating my own narrative at the university of notre dame. surrounded by individuals who are excited to push me and hear my story, i look forward to my future years on this campus. integration one integration one what do i believe? the power of love throughout high school psychology, my teacher always told us that humans are complex, so it is not easy to predict their feelings and behavior. this idea struck me: each of us have unique experiences, perspectives, and beliefs that make us into the people we are. in my life, i am influenced by my family, friends, environment, culture, and so much more. these aspects all shape who i am and consequently what i believe. upon deep reflection, i have come to realize that i believe in the importance of love, and this can be seen through my root beliefs. one of my root beliefs is that i believe i am made to spread love to other people. growing up, i always learned about the importance of kindness and love. being raised catholic has provided me guidelines with how to treat others. from sunday school classes when i was little where we colored pictures that said “jesus loves me!” to scripture about treating others well, i have had this virtue emphasized in my life for as long as i can remember. my faith is a big factor that has shaped my beliefs—i wouldn’t be who i am today without god and the catholic church. when considering the ways in which stories have shaped my journey, i watched fr. kevin’s talk in which he stated that “a catholic education means that every discipline that searches for truth, shares in that final and most beautiful truth that calls us to serve each other in love” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, moreau fye week five). this quote stood out to me because it is why i chose to attend notre dame. it was very important to me to pick a university that emphasized the importance of teaching love. throughout my four years here, i hope to develop my ability to empathize with others and spread love. i am lucky that my faith has put me on the path to serve this goal. i even decided to make confirmation here: an important step on my faith journey that will bring me closer to god. i hope that my relationship with him will deepen, which will allow me to deepen my relationships with others as a result. additionally, in the reading for searching for a framework, the article “faith brings light to a dark world” states that “the unexpected flashes of love in our lives illuminate reality, like a thunderbolt of lightning can illuminate the dark yard” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, moreau fye week three). throughout this article, the author compares faith to light that illuminates our lives. he mentions that an important component of faith is love—through our faith in god, we learn to love him, ourselves, and others. faith has taught me to love. as my faith develops, i will continue to spread love. another root belief i possess is that i form life-giving relationships by treating the people in my life fairly and kindly. i am deeply enamored by the concept of love languages. i have always found it fascinating that people can feel the same way about each other but express this love in such different ways. my mom shows her love through acts of service—cutting up fruit as a snack even when i don’t ask, offering help and advice when i need it, and generally being there whenever i need her. my dad, however, shows his love through quality time. when we spend time together, even something simple like sitting outside together, i feel his love for me. i have always noticed the different ways that people love. i realized that in order to show love for the people in my life, i must love in their love language. my mom is happy when i offer help with cooking, and my dad is thrilled when i ask to go on a walk with him and our dog. learning to treat others reciprocally builds life-giving relationships that last and fortify love in our lives. the article from searching for life-giving relationships states that “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, moreau fye week four). life-giving relationships must benefit both individuals involved. this creates a relationship where both people help each other become better versions of themselves and spread love. it is important to treat people with fairness and kindness in order to be a loving person (as i wish to be). another significant core belief i hold is that i believe i grow by doing my best to understand others, allowing for empathy and love to develop in turn. when i was young, i struggled in feeling empathy toward others—growing up as an only child unfortunately created some selfish tendencies. as i aged, however, i learned how to share and respect the feelings of others, and now i am quite empathetic. however, i cannot relate to everyone’s stories: as much as i can try, i can’t change the fact that different people experience unique struggles. i can listen to their stories, though, and try to be there for them. in adichie’s ted talk under the topic of identifying perspectives, she says “to insist on only… negative stories is to flatten my experience and to overlook the many other stories that formed me” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, moreau fye week 7). in her talk, adichie explains the influence of a single story on our perceptions of people and the world. to overcome the biases that these ideas may create, we must learn to listen to each other. if we respect the stories of others, we can better understand them, rather than reducing them to a single idea about their culture or life. this skill allows us to be empathetic: we may not be able to relate to the struggles of others, but we can help them through it. we can respect that these struggles are only part of what makes up a person. like adichie says, we must realize that people are more than negative stories about them. when we empathize with others, we feel closer to them, and can spread our love through our support. additionally, i believe i grow by improving myself so that i can be a better version of myself in my relationships with others. this has always been a struggle for me—for years, i have experienced severe anxiety. sometimes, i haven’t acted fairly toward others because of the stress i felt in these relationships. this isn’t a fair excuse, though. i can’t use my mental illness to defend unkind actions. recently, i have gone on medication. since then, my life has improved significantly, and i am better able to manage my anxiety. i also have been working to improve myself and better manage my stress: i exercise regularly, i sleep more, and i eat better than i used to when my anxiety was at its worst. i now can realize how my actions impact others. by improving myself, i improve how i treat others, allowing me to be kinder and more loving. self-improvement is a goal that i always strive for. in the topic searching for belonging, brené brown says that “the one thing that keeps us out of connection is our fear that we’re not worthy of connection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown, moreau fye week one). with this quote, she argues that our ability to form relationships with others is hindered only by our own fears. if we can work to improve these vulnerabilities and realize that we are in fact worthy of love, we can be better versions of ourselves in our relationships with others. when we improve ourselves, we consequently improve our relationships as well. through self-improvement, i grow as a person and can better spread love to others. while all these beliefs are different, they make me who i am. my root beliefs illustrate that i believe in the importance of spreading love and being kind to others. throughout my time at notre dame, i know that these beliefs will further develop, and i will become the best, most loving version of myself that i can be. integration 2 spence 1 bryan reaume moreau first-year experience november 28, 2021 integration 2 this first semester has come with many challenges and “curveballs”, what i have learned from this course is how to adjust. i heard the words “adjust” or “adjusting” countless times in my first few months here at notre dame. what i didn’t realize then, was that this moreau course has been a huge way of finding myself and how i can fit into this new lifestyle here at notre dame. week by week i learned valuable lessons that helped me learn how to adjust and react to problems or hardships i may encounter in life. every week and lesson tough me some of the most valuable lessons when learning to adjust to my new life here at notre dame. expanding from the first half of the semester, i will show how the qqc assignments 9-12 have impacted my mind. in week nine’s qqc module, i found a term and description with a particular feeling that i am very familiar with. i have always thought of my failures to be that i was not working hard enough. this is not always the case, sometimes in order to grow, you have to fail. the hardest part for me is learning how to be comfortable with failure. in cox’s video, she explains that pluralistic ignorance is where we each doubt ourselves in our own heads, not thinking if anyone else is going through the same struggles. i have learned to overcome this feeling by talking to people that are in the same environment as me. for example, school is hard, and sometimes baseball is even harder, but when i talk to my teammates spence 2 and realize that i am not alone in my stressful thoughts, i feel more comfortable with the path that i am on. i have learned that to continue growing, i need to continue talking and reaching out to my peers to feel more comfortable with what i am dealing with at the time. this will all lead me back to growing a stronger sense of the community here at notre dame. week 10 beheld one of my favorite qqc’s of them all, i was very interested in the kintsugi workshop, with the goal of being able to repair themselves. this workshop has people make beautiful pieces of poetry, and proceed to smash them. to me, this can resemble how unexpected things can turn your seemingly perfect life upside down. this world can be very cold and unforgiving, some of the worst things may happen to the most undeserving people. the reality is, no matter what happens to you, it is never a means to an end. life gives you all sorts of second chances and new beginnings if you try and live every day to the fullest. i think that our community here at notre dame is very forgiving, but comes with its challenges. for me, i am learning how to balance school and baseball. this is something i struggled with as i reflected on my midterm grades. i had multiple deficiencies in classes and i ended the falling short of my goals on the baseball field. it felt as if i was digging my own grave, continuously failing without being able to see the bottom. one thing i have gotten better at is reaching out for help, notre dame’s teachers, faculty, athletes, and students all want each other to succeed here. i hope to respond to the challenges of my community by reaching out and helping others that are in similar situations that i have been in. if everyone devotes just a little piece of their day to helping one person out, we will have a much stronger sense of community. moving into week 11, we started to shift into the value of relationships and trusted bonds. i believe that to create a strong bond with each other, you need to use the golden rule! yes, the spence 3 videos we all watched as kids, the golden rule. we all took the “golden rule” as a moral code to treat others how we would wish to be treated, some took this moral with a grain of salt, but some implemented it into their interactions with others. i believe that everyone, no matter what race, gender, or ethnicity should be treated with the same amount of respect you give towards your closest friends and family. especially here at notre dame, i have accepted that the community that we are in has become my new family. in the building bridges video, don wycliff talks about really getting to know each other in conversation. there is not a whole lot of effort that goes into having more conversations with people in my community. i feel that if everyone spent a little more time getting to know one another, we would strengthen our bonds with the community as a whole. my goal is to learn how to treat people with the most uplifting energy that i have, i have seen it make my day, and i want it to make others’ days too. it doesn’t take much to show energy and care towards others, regardless of skin color or beliefs. growing in any aspect of our lives has been a consistent theme throughout the moreau course this semester. and although this course and the readings that come assigned with it are supposed to help us grow, i have felt that i grow most through experiences, not from a book. only through digging deep into my heart and morals, i will change. in our last qqc, we learned about hope. hope, to me, is trusting in a certain process or faith. personally, it is hard to figure out what “trusting the process” looks like in baseball. it looks no different, but with more confidence in what i am doing, i can execute to the best of my ability. outside of baseball, i have never had the strongest sense of faith. my family was never actively practicing when i was young. since i have been at notre dame, i have started to learn that having a stronger sense of spence 4 faith can help me through my journey. in “holy cross and christian education”, it is easy to see that in the christian faith, the goal is to spread hope. to me, this means that there is always something to believe in even in the seemingly darkest times. the author states, “we must be men with hope to bring. there is no failure the lord’s love cannot reverse…”. even in the darkest of times, there is nothing more powerful than the lord’s love. i am extremely grateful to have had a well-run moreau class with a good group of people, headed by a great professor. i am eager to continue to discover myself, with the help of others around me. spence 5 works cited cox, elizabeth. “you need to have javascript enabled in order to access this site.” messaging: imposter syndrome: hww2021! training, https://canvas.ou.edu/courses/248293/modules/items/3559114. “holy cross and christian education.” campus ministry at the university of notre dame. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “don wycliff.” with voices true, https://voicestrue.nd.edu/stories/don-wycliff/. women find healing through kintsugi workshop youtube. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgjljeqd8gg. moreau integration 2 professor thigpen moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 continuing on the journey of self-discovery and self-worth my first semester at notre dame has brought me plenty of new experiences, new people, new challenges, and new perspectives on life. it has forced me to dig deeper into what i want my future to consist of and how i can get there. most importantly though, it has forced me to realize the significance of working on myself and practicing self-confidence. being surrounded by so many people and possible relationships brought me to the realization that there are some things i need to overcome in order to completely be myself around people and make important decisions regarding those relationships. in my integration one, i focused on finding who i am and using that in building stronger self-confidence. i made a point that i wanted to turn away from comparing myself to others and practice more activities where i focus on myself. one of these activities that i listed was journaling, and i have journalled every night before bed, except for a few where i was not feeling well and needed to get sleep. putting my thoughts of the day down helped me evaluate things that i wasn’t sure about, or things that had happened earlier in the day that i was overthinking. writing down my worries for the future seemed to take some of the burden off of me. writing about missing my family sometimes left me feeling emotional, but overall was a rewarding experience to see how much they mean to me. however, sometimes i felt as if i was repeating myself in my journals. i think i can improve upon this by searching for journal prompts and asking myself deeper, more thought-provoking questions. the biggest struggle that i am currently encountering is finding things that i am passionate about, and not letting the thought of what others may think of that affect my decision on what i want to do. in week nine, i commented on the following quote: “trust yourself. don’t look to others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to” (“why letting go of expectations is freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i stated that i wanted to incorporate this quote into my life, but it is one thing to say you’re going to do something and another to actually do it. it isn’t easy to change a mindset that you have had for most of your life, but i hope that continuing on my journey to trusting in myself will help me achieve this. one way to take steps towards trusting myself and not worrying about others is to step outside of my comfort zone and try new things. one regret i have during the first semester of school is that i thought i would be too overwhelmed with clubs and only participated in two that don't require a lot of time (society of women engineers and field hockey). in week 12, i looked into the following quote: “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-find-your-calling/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau vocation as citizens in this world and for the next” (“holy cross and christian education” by rev. james b. king moreau fye week 12). i want to focus on the first part of this quote, where stepping out of our comfort zones is difficult but rewarding. i am apprehensive about joining clubs because i am putting myself out there, alone, without the support of a friend to come with me. however, i know that pushing beyond the limits of my comfort zone, even if it is a small push, gives me a boost of confidence, as i have experienced this in instances this semester. for instance, i was nervous about attending an syr dance that i was invited to, but decided to go, had a good time, and felt proud of myself for deciding to go. if i start to make these small steps, i hope to boost my confidence while also trying out things i am interested in to learn more about myself and my passions. when speaking to someone new, or someone that i don’t have a strong relationship with, i often overthink what i am saying to the person and if they like me. it’s almost as if i am forcing myself to act so i can be liked by everyone, working to please other people rather than myself.. in week 11, i mentioned the following quote: “when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally. when we try to “make community happen,” driven by desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks—we can make a good guess at the outcome: we will exhaust ourselves and alienate each other, snapping the connections we yearn for.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). although i am not building community out of my ego, i am treating community as a product that i manufacture by putting so much effort in how i present myself to others. i feel as though i need to relax and let what happens happen. if i am treating creating a community as a chore, then i will not feel motivated to talk to others, and therefore i will be acting counterintuitively. instead, i should work on what type of people i enjoy being around and not worry about if others are enjoying being around me. one thing that i think about when worrying if others are enjoying talking to me is if i am boring, or uninteresting to them. i often talk about school, but when the conversation flows to my personal life-where i come from, what i like to do-i feel as though i feel more comfortable and a deeper connection is formed. i feel as though i stand out when i talk about the small town where i am from and i love talking to my friends about my family and the things i used to do in my childhood. the following quote in week 10 made me feel even more comfortable in sharing what makes me, me: “the things they've experienced, the good, the bad, the ugly, all of thatit has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring.” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop”by grotto moreau fye week 10). this quote allowed me to add something to my core values: everyone comes from different experiences and every aspect of those experiences should be celebrated and appreciated by others. while i embrace my past, i look forward to appreciating others’ stories when they tell them to me because of my newfound recognition for the importance of our experiences. each topic in week 9 touched a part of me that i could relate to. i feel like i have imposter syndrome for being at notre dame, but have learned to be proud of the fact that i got in http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ and recognize that although there are very intelligent people at this college, that doesn’t mean that i am not worth the same as them. week 9 was also comforting through the video about being a lonely college student. seeing my friends from high school have large friend groups that they hang out with made me feel that i was doing something wrong because my situation wasn’t the same as theirs. after watching the video, i realized that everyone’s experience is different, and i am going through college in my own way; it may not be the exact same as my high school friend, and that’s okay. occasionally, i question what i am doing at notre dame. if the tuition is worth me pursuing an engineering degree, something that i am unsure of if i will enjoy. while i’m still figuring out where my passions lie and what i want to do for my career, i have doubts on if i am doing the right thing. i wonder what others would think of my future choices. would i be living up to their expectations? would i be living up to the expectations i have for myself? the article in week 9, why letting go of expectation is a freeing habit, helped me see that i need to let these expectations go and trust in myself to decide what i want to do. it also told me that nothing has to be perfect right now. instead, i can start on something that i think is right for me now, and then adapt later. currently, i recognize that going to notre dame is a rare opportunity and an engineering degree is a way into a broad selection of jobs. my future doesn’t have to be set in stone, and that is something i am learning to appreciate and work with. the articles and questions that i encountered through moreau have always connected to the experiences that i was going through during my first semester of college. this has helped me learn more about myself and what is important to me. i look forward to using some of the sources, such as brene brown’s video from week one and all of the articles in week nine, throughout my entire college experience and life. my first semester has prompted me to look into what i value, who i am, and what i can work on. i am excited to continue this journey and see where i am, as a person, at the end of my first year at notre dame. integration two korth 1 catherine wagner moreau fye 3 december 2021 personal development furthers possibilities i began my first semester at notre dame feeling very uncertain about what this new chapter of my life would have in store for me. as the end of the first semester approaches, i am beginning to realize and reflect upon the substantial change that i’ve undergone in so little time. even though i’ve only been at notre dame for a few months, it feels like i’ve experienced at least a year’s worth of personal growth. despite this, i still remain with many uncertainties about the future. in college, the possibilities for change are endless. in just one semester, i’ve encountered various people, lessons, struggles, and experiences that have undoubtedly impacted my life and opened up countless possibilities for my future. one of the most important lessons i have learned this semester is that it’s okay to let go of expectations. my entire life, i’ve been determining my self-worth based on whether or not i adhere to a certain set of standards. expectations like keeping straight a’s in school, earning a medal at state speech, or getting into a top university dictated my life. these standards are sometimes created by society or friends and family, but they’re most often self-imposed. i’ve been told by many people in my life that i’m too hard on myself, but i’ve never accepted that they were right until this semester. there were many moments this semester where i struggled with feelings of self-doubt, failure, and overall inadequacy. these emotions typically arose after receiving an undesirable grade, struggling to keep up with schoolwork, or comparing myself to others. for the first time in a long time, i was failing to meet my expectations, and it was korth 2 dramatically affecting my personal wellbeing. this is when i realized that it was time to make a change. i took the advice of an article we read for moreau. “remember that none of us are perfect. we all make mistakes. we will disappoint people. we’ll disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens. instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). since reading this article, i’ve been working on managing personal expectations as well as the expectations of others by being patient with myself, anticipating all possible outcomes of situations, and prioritizing learning as my primary expectation in life. doing so has improved my mental health and has helped me be more open to change. for example, even though my expectation coming into college was to major in political science and eventually attend law school, i am now considering majoring in psychology or film, television, and theatre. letting go of expectations has helped me expand my horizons and imagine many possibilities for my future. one experience that greatly impacted me this semester was the tension that ensued on campus after a student wrote a controversial article in the irish rover. she argued that notre dame’s handling of lgbtq+ issues is incoherent with catholic church teachings. being a bisexual man from a catholic background, i was hurt by this article. one of my fears about coming to a catholic school like notre dame was that i would not be able to live as my authentic self. many other students shared my feelings and took to social media to express their frustration. soon, there was an article written in the observer that seemed to make a counterargument to the article in the irish rover. the article stated that notre dame has an opportunity and a responsibility to call more lgbtq+ people into the love of jesus. i was both impressed and https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau korth 3 inspired by how this author responded to the article from the irish rover. after the release of her article, many students immediately took to attacking the character of the rover author. however, this is not an effective way to engage in public debate. “our attempts to express our convictions should take the form of an effort to persuade. if i am confident in my beliefs, and i have love and good will for the other side, then it would be my duty to try to persuade them. and if i want to persuade them, then how can i vilify them? people are not persuaded by those who attack their character,” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). when engaging in public discourse, i aspire to be like the author of the article published in the observer. the social and political crisis that we face in america is not going to improve if we continue to vilify one another. another new experience i had this semester at notre dame was living in a diverse community of people. i went to a predominantly white high school and lived in a predominantly white town, so i only had a few non-white friends before coming to notre dame. however, my friend group now consists almost entirely of people of color. i now realize how important it is to have a diverse group of friends. diversity in friendships breaks stereotypes, promotes awareness of discrimination or prejudices that different people face, and furthers understanding of different cultures. “people don’t even consciously realize how racialized and racist our society is, but change is more possible when we hear different voices,” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). i hope to continue hearing more diverse voices at notre dame; they can always count on me to listen. one unexpected way that i changed this semester was in my outlook on religion. i was hesitant about coming to a religious school because of some negative experiences i’ve had through my religious upbringing. obviously, it’s not easy being raised catholic as an lgbtq+ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 korth 4 person. i’ve always felt like i had to choose between my identity and my religious beliefs. however, i’ve seen a whole different side of religious people since coming to notre dame, and i’m now willing to reexamine christianity despite having experienced religious trauma. some classes like god and the good life and moreau have also played a role in my religious revival. i enjoyed reading from c.s. lewis’ the screwtape letters in moreau. “our cause is never more in danger than when a human, no longer desiring, but still intending, to do our enemy’s will, looks round upon a universe from which every trace of him seems to have vanished, and asks why he has been forsaken, and still obeys,” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i’m saddened by phrases like, “there’s no hate like christian love,” because they show how much the christian community has failed in spreading god’s love. however, i still think there’s hope for mending bridges between christians and the communities they’ve harmed. this semester has been defined by the friendships i’ve made, hardships i’ve endured, and lessons i’ve learned. i hope to apply what i’ve learned and encountered this semester to continue growing in my personal development at notre dame. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/24970/files/188325?module_item_id=105117 moreau fye integration 2 quinn elemer barbaza mr. andrew whittington moreau first year experience 1 december 2021 the nature of change it is necessary to preface this reflection by confessing that my beliefs and basis of living have changed drastically in the short time since my last integration. i honestly have no idea whether or not this is for the better, or if it is just a result of stress and pain and myself gradually growing accustomed to the magic of notre dame. the magic, wonder, and awe that accompanied my arrival have not dwindled or lost their shine, but i have grown used to the bubble that is notre dame and my being here. i have had several reality checks along the way, and while that language generally has a negative connotation, i am glad to have had them. a lot of these “reality checks” are indicative of what i have encountered over the past semester and some of the more important things from my entire life. so, if you would bide a while, i’m figuring this out as i write it. i’ve encountered a lot of pain. sorry to start out this reflection on a dark note, but suspensions are everywhere in music for a reason. one of the things i promised myself before i got here was that i wouldn’t forget where i’m from, both literally and metaphorically. not pessimistically, only focus on the bad way, but in more of a remember what i lost to get here. so yeah, i’ve encountered a lot of pain, personal and otherwise. there were almost 600 shootings in my hometown alone in 2021, and that number only counted up to september. a few months ago, a gunfight happened at a mall where a lot of my friends work and live near. last week, another happened at the same mall. word back home is that there’s a new gang moving in on territory. i grew up in a great city, in which i could have gotten shot. i grew up in a city where people i knew did get shot. the reality of tensions in society is unshakable, which i talked about a couple of times, most notably in week 10 when i commented on my friend getting threatened with a klan hood. but i think the best way to address these problems is by working with communities. “hard experiences...are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (13 ways of looking at community by parker palmer, moreau fye week 11). communities form to combat difficult experiences. humanity is so much better when united against a common enemy, and the best way to keep communities from isolating themselves in an endless cycle is to show them how similar they are. now, differences remain, and the passion for the subject i expressed remains. i still believe that there are some sides that are flat out wrong, and i still feel a great deal of anger towards communities that actively hurt others. but that doesn’t change my plan to combat the brokenness i have grown up to know by serving my http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ community. i plan on working to convert cities to sustainable energy and more efficient, cost-effective living in order to improve the lives of all the impoverished. an ambitious goal, but that will not stop me from trying. i think the bonds of community are what can save our society, they just need to be realized as universal. i realize the ambition in the previous statement, especially as our society has become more divided than ever and the brokenness among communities is only getting worse. yet i have hope that that can change. human existence is fleeting and exceedingly young. our intellect makes us arrogant, makes us assume that we will rule the world for eternity, where we haven’t even existed as long as older species reigned. we have a long way to go, but that is how the world works. therefore, i have hope that i can help. week 12 presented a challenge to this line of thinking, but i realize that it also presented a solution. “their nearest approach to constancy, therefore is undulation--the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis, moreau fye week 12). yes, this implies that any efforts to improve human life will return to the same medium and essentially makes my resolution helpless. however, there is nothing to say that we cannot change the medium itself. not trying to do so will only confirm our fears, and there is nothing to gain from focusing on futility. that is the whole point of hope. yes, i have encountered a lot of things that could make me lose hope, but i have also encountered things that renew it. it’s a cycle as lewis describes in its own, always returning to a medium of hope for what is to come. i’ve also encountered a lot of pain within myself. i’ve already discussed some of my family issues, especially with expectations and the effects they had upon me. “these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan, moreau fye week 9). there is a lot more to the personal pain, but i’ve already talked about sources. i’ve encountered a lot to make me doubt myself, a lot to make me hate myself, and a lot to make me question my own integrity and worth. i have a difficult time reacting to expectations. a part of me will always be driven to exceed them. i was brought up that way and that is how i see the world, i am incapable of ignoring expectations. i also don’t know if that is a good thing or a bad thing. on the one hand, exceeding expectations got me here. doing so got me to my dream school, where i have never been happier or more grateful for the life that i have. i would love to say that i will respond how hogan recommends, and live the nice sentiment that they are only expectations and not definitive rules. in principle, that is a fantastic way to live. it’s not how i live, it’s not how i think, it’s not how i operate as a human being. i care entirely too much about what the people around me want to ignore their expectations, and my own for that matter. a prime example of this happened over thanksgiving break. my father was waging war on my family, challenging my aunt and uncle constantly who were doting on me, as they have no children of their own and haven’t seen me in months. my father was taking every opportunity to ridicule them and make it clear to me that they weren’t my parents. this is a common practice of his with most of the adults in my life. the expectation, however, was that i back him up. every comment that he made, he would look at me and expect me to voice my support of his opinion, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28308/pages/introduction-to-week-12-encountering-hope?module_item_id=106237 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau not give my own. not meeting that expectation hurt him, as he felt that the family was taking sides against him, and “his own son was making him the villain”. i hate hurting people more than anything, yet in that situation there is no action i can take that doesn’t hurt someone. how do i meet that expectation while meeting my own of not hurting people? i can’t pick or prioritize one, he’s my dad. i have been dealing with situations like these all my life, like when a father-figure of mine passed away and my own father could not understand why i was crying. learning about myself and coming to notre dame has helped me figure out how i deal with expectations and how i plan to do so moving forward. father jenkins puts it better than i can: “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia” (wesley theological seminary commencement by father jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). i will live my expectations and the expectations of those around me with conviction. the drive and purpose of meeting the values of my life, which i have always utilized, but i will do so now with the knowledge that the power behind conviction is effort. if i fail or do not meet an expectation that i value, it will not be out of lack of effort. because at the end of the day, i can be certain of nothing. i can never be certain that i did the right thing. i can never be certain that what i did was enough. to do so is arrogance to me. at the end of the day, all i will have is how much i put into my life, how much i tried to do right, tried to do good, and tried to be the best person i could be. that is what matters most to me, which moreau fye has helped me realize. sure, good intentions can lead to bad results, and a pursuit of being the best can cause pain. we can do great evil as we pursue good, but that doesn’t mean that our pursuit cannot be one of repentance, redemption, or correction. it matters not how many errors we make, what matters is how we respond to them. i can wallow and cry myself to sleep over the pain i have experienced. i did so for far too long. it is a part of me now, and i will take it in stride as i pursue life and happiness. who would i be without my pain? therefore, i think that above all, i have encountered life. a lot of it. what other response could i have than to live it? so that is what i shall do: continuing living my life to its fullest extent, because it has meaning. it has hope. i have so much more ahead of me. my response is to live it. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ microsoft word integration pt 2.docx arwen oliva mr. polotto moreau fys 10101 22 november 2021 finding new horizons in my college experience there were probably infinite situations over the summer where adult figureheads would tell us college is going to change our views on the variety of things. constantly hearing about how “great” this so-called college experience would be just translated into straight gibberish in my mind during those hot summer months. flash forward to these cold november days, i think to myself, “maybe they were right”. as cheesy as those adults sounded, they were right; college truly does expand your horizons on various perspectives. ranging from learning about foreign cultures to what foods make your stomach upset, college is just the right place to figure out who you are. at such a prestigious university, many students here at notre dame often find themselves dismissing their intelligence or feeling intimidated by the fact that other people “are way smarter” than they are and emphasizing that they don’t belong in such a place. this can be defined as imposter syndrome. in julia hogan’s, why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, she highlights that “when you let your self-worth depend on the approval of others, disappointing them feels like the most devastating thing in the world” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan – moreau fye week 9). when i was a child, whenever i would get straight a’s on my report card, my parents would treat me to an ice cream to reward me for my outstanding effort in school. however, because of this pattern that occurred when i was younger, i often find myself beating myself up emotionally and mentally if i am not living up to these standards academically in college; i feel as if i am letting not only my parents down, but myself down. this quote resonates with me because if we are constantly seeking outside approval, we will deep down never be truly satisfied with our work. living in this constant state of anxiety is not safe for my mental well-being. i have come to learn to be proud of myself for all that i have accomplished and having made it to the university i am at today. if i know that my academic successes are living up to my work ethic, then there is no need for external validation. another expansion of horizon i have encountered during this college experience is the construction of community. the word “community” was a word i heard countless times during welcome weekend to the point where it is practically engrained within the wrinkles of my brain. one of my immediate thoughts was how to even build a community. where do i start? in fr. john jenkins’, wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address, he discusses, “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address by fr. john jenkins – moreau fye week 10). the importance of his statement is the reference of jesus’s new commandment, in which he told his disciples to love their neighbors as themselves. the real truth that most of the notre dame welcome committee failed to mention was that we are not going to enjoy the presence of everyone we encounter; and in all honesty, that is okay. however, fr. jenkins wants us to know that we must never utilize hatred toward one another. hatred is the component that directly tears down a community. therefore, although we may not love all our peers, it is extremely vital to treat them with the patience and love god intended for us to do, as that is the basis of what a strong community lies on. as i mentioned above, coming to college i have encountered a few individuals who i simply have no connection with, including my roommate. i tend to be an extremely clean and organized person and my roommate is most definitely the polar opposite. most of the things she does completely irks me and is just not within my comfort zone. in parker j palmer’s, thirteen ways of looking at community, he states “when we try to ‘make community happen’, driven by desire, design, and determination—places within us where the ego often lurks—we can make a good guess at the outcome: we will exhaust ourselves and alienate each other, snapping the connections we yearn for. too many relationships have been diminished or destroyed by a drive toward “community-building” which evokes a grasping that is the opposite of what we need to do: relax into our created condition and receive the gift we have been given” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j palmer – moreau fye week 11). when notre dame emphasized community-building, i did not realize that it meant letting relationships form naturally. i believe that one of my largest mistakes coming into college was trying to force unnatural relationships with others such as my roommate. as the situation between her and i unfolded, things just in a way “blew up” to the point where we do not even speak anymore. looking at it now, i wish i would have known to let our relationship form naturally rather than trying to bring about a friendship that was never there. i have learned that the best way to let community build is simply to just relax; let things happen according to the universe and there will be peace. has college been the perfect, renewing experience i thought it would be? absolutely not. however, i do have to admit that i have encountered many horizons that have taught me the importance of foreign cultural perspectives, community-building, and faith not only within myself, but within god as well. i have learned how to build relationships with others in a healthy manner, treated myself with love, placed my happiness as my main priority, and most of all, made the most out of each and every day. after all, i am extremely thankful for the blessings god has granted me and give my gratitude for have such a supportive and loving community everywhere i go. word count: 1058 integration one integration one i believe that i am searching for deep connections with people. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by sharing fun experiences as well as through being vulnerable. i believe that i grow by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and by trying new things. i believe that i am responsible for how i treat those with who i may not get along or agree with. i believe that i pursue truth by turning to my faith and through introspection. i believe that my community should talk about our differences and learn how to work together towards a more inclusive future. raleigh’s core beliefs firstly, i believe that i am searching for deep connections with people. though i want to have a lot of friends—i am blessed to have a large group of people i hang out with regularly—i thrive when i have a few very close friends with who i can share everything with. somehow, i found my two best friends very quickly when i got here, and they are the two girls i’m closest with. now, i’m working on forging deeper relationships with more people to expand my circle of very close friends. in high school, my closest friend turned out to be extremely toxic, (she checked nearly every box pointed out by olivia t. taylor in her article) so it’s extremely important for me to form healthy relationships right now. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by sharing fun experiences as well as through being vulnerable. i’ve made so many fun memories with friends over these past two months. some of these memories were made on friday nights out, but more of them were made in someone’s dorm room or in the student union at holy cross. i love making jokes and sharing funny experiences with friends, but stronger bonds have been made when we share deeper things about ourselves. when we are not afraid to be vulnerable, like brené brown talked about in her ted talk, we can grow both as an individual and in our friendships. it is a constant struggle for me to open up to people, but i am working on actively being vulnerable and on forming relationships with people who i feel comfortable with. i believe that i grow by pushing myself out of my comfort zone and by trying new things. like david brooks said, “adam 1 is built by building on your strengths. adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses.” the way i was in high school limited the friends i could get close with and the fun i could have. with this new start in college, i am being truly and completely myself, forming a new identity for myself. to do this, i have to push myself to do things that i might not have done in high school, like going out, talking to guys, being outgoing, and more. right now i’m talking to a certain guy and seeing where it goes, which is something i would have been afraid to do a few years ago. i’m trying to listen to my heart as well as my head, instead of just letting one or the other take over, which tends to happen to me. i believe that i am responsible for how i treat those with who i may not get along or agree with. i’ve always had a hard time hiding my feelings about someone and i don’t like to waste my time and energy on people who drive me crazy or who drag me down. however, the unique experience of gateway pushes a group of us all together for a whole year… so if there are rifts between people it will be extremely awkward. especially here, where people have a wide range of personalities, political beliefs, social beliefs, and morals, it can be hard to treat everyone with respect. there’s a certain guy who drives nearly everyone crazy because of his words and actions, but even though i can barely stand to be around him, i need to work on treating him kindly. i am responsible for my own actions with regard to people who may think or act differently from me. i believe that i pursue truth by turning to my faith and through introspection. my faith has grown while being in college because i now have to make time for listening to a church service on my own while balancing a busy schedule of studying and friends. i have to keep up the good habits of prayer and of reading my bible before bed even when i’m exhausted and going to bed at three in the morning. i need to continue to work on setting aside time for prayer and for introspection—sometimes i’m surrounded by people so much that i barely have time to think for myself and to really process information and experiences. moreau has been a good opportunity for me to write about what i believe and to lear about myself. for example, writing the “where i’m from” poem allowed me to analyze what experiences and which people have shaped me into the person i am today. i need to be more dutiful about making time for my faith and for introspection because as david fagerberg said, “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god.” i believe that my community should talk about our differences and learn how to work together towards a more inclusive future. one of my best friends is a woman of color, so talking to her and witnessing some of the things she goes through on a daily basis (like implicit biases, having her experience be invalidated by others, and microaggressions) has taught me a lot. it has helped me to realize that our society has a lot of work to do before we are all on an equal footing. people tend to shy away from hard conversations, but we need to have these talks so we can learn from one another. it hurts my heart to see some of the things my friend goes through, and i’ve had so many friends in the past who experience similar things because of their gender orientation or sexual orientation and it always shocks me how insensitive some people can be. this doesn’t just apply to people here in college—carla harris shared her “pearls” of wisdom that she had learned “after being a woman of color on wall street for 34 years,” which provided her with a wealth of both experiences and of prejudices and struggles. i am working on educating myself even more and being there for my friends to support them, no matter what. another part of this is being aware of my own implicit biases and working to combat them, because we are all guilty of believing a “single story,” like chimamanda ngozi adichie pointed out. works cited: (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two) (“faith brings light into a dark world” david fagerberg moreau fye week three) (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ (“2021 laetare medalist address” carla harris moreau fye week five) (“where i’m from” george ella lyon moreau fye week six) (“danger of a single story” chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration where i am meant to be just eight weeks ago, i embarked on my notre dame journey, both anxiously and happily anticipating what the future held. already, i have found an education that challenges me to not only think critically about class material, but also to understand the deeper implications of these lessons on my life and my purpose. although i am still in the early stages of my college career, i am grateful for the amazing experiences i have already had, and i am proud of the beliefs i have formed and acted upon: the beliefs that will continue to shape me as a person over the next four years and beyond. i believe that developing self-love and respect are the foundation for living a fulfilled life. if one wishes to engage in a community or to make an impact on others, they must first arrive at these states to ensure they are the best version of themselves. we must be open minded and accepting of ourselves because vulnerability is the starting place for joy, creativity, and belonging (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). it can be difficult to open ourselves up and analyze the root of our fears and insecurities, but it is necessary for growth. additionally, developing a sense of self-worth leads to stronger relationships with others. when one is confident and proud of who they are, they are more likely to not accept toxicity in relationships. i believe it is crucial to understand you are worthy of healthy relationships; this will help you recognize ingenuine love in which an individual can make you feel guilty or worthless (“because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation moreau fye week 4). learning to love and accept ourselves makes us overall more content in life and leads to long lasting relationships in which we can be fully ourselves, fearing no judgement. the importance of working on oneself does not end there. i believe that building good character and becoming a person that you are proud of will lead to long-term happiness in https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g life. there seems to be a struggle in life between wanting to be successful and make great sums of money, or pursuing a true passion or dream, and finding true happiness. “we live in a perpetual self confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks moreau fye week two). though both success and internal self-fulfillment are important, i believe that it is important to remember that one day, your successes and accomplishments will all be behind you. what will be left to define your life is your character: how you treat the people around you, the manner in which you view yourself and the world, and the values you hold. your internal growth is an ongoing process throughout your entire life. it is for this reason that i believe the need to develop a strong sense of self-love and identity through actively working on one’s self is the foundation for finding happiness. i believe that communities greatly shape their individuals, but the individual can also make a great impact on the community. i grew up constantly surrounded by love from family and friends. family was always at the core of my life, and it is a major reason why i wanted to come to notre dame. there is no other university that cultivates such a strong sense of family. i believe the community i was raised in played a great role in the person i grew up to be. i was raised on philadelphia sports, family breakfast after mass, and a hometown full of familiar faces. at the time, i was certainly a product of my environment, which is both a positive and negative observation. i love what, where, and who i am from, but i also recognize that my experiences and perspectives are limited by my origins. i grew up in a town that lacked diversity in many ways. i have never lived anywhere else, or traveled to many strikingly different places, for that matter. therefore, i recognize that where i am from has a lot to do with who i am, but even moreso, it is only the starting point for an expansion of my perspective (moreau fye week 6). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim coming to notre dame has been an eye-opening experience. here, some of the brightest and most creative minds come together to discuss, innovate, and inspire. what makes this even more special is that everyone here comes from a different background with their own unique stories to contribute. in this way, the individual plays a major role in shaping the community. notre dame is a special place because of the diverse individuals who compose its population. i believe it is extremely important, therefore, that we respect and appreciate the differences between people and groups. we may not even realize it, but we are more biased than we think ( "how to think about 'implicit bias'" by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week 7). to overcome bias, it is crucial to remain open minded. we are building a community where everybody’s differences contribute to our holism, and that is an amazing thing to be a part of. we should embrace the fact that we are part of a diverse community that will lead us to an expansion of knowledge and perspective, but we should also recognize and appreciate the individual role that we get to play in allowing our personal stories to contribute to the notre dame family. i believe that i am meant to use my faith and education for larger purposes in this world. the university of notre dame was founded upon the idea of educating in a way that will transform both minds and hearts, allowing students to serve others, spreading faith and love. at notre dame, education is seen as “a work of the resurrection” and it is known that faith and reason must always coincide ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week 5). it is in this environment that i am confident i will grow in my faith. the beliefs that are so ingrained in this university, dating all the way back to its founding, are the same ones that i value the most. i am certain that these beliefs and values are the stepping stones to a path of making a true impact on the people around me. as father kevin grove said in https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 his video, “we are blessed so that we may be a blessing to others.” i am blessed to be in the position that i am, but i know that i was sent here to do more with the gifts i have been given. to be granted such an amazing education and opportunity is no accident. i believe i am on a path to change others for good using the faith and genuine character that i will build throughout the next four years. faith is interpreted differently by everyone, even among students at this faithful university. religion has always been an important part of my life, but i think being a member of a community of faith is about much more than simply religion. those who have faith in something, anything, find an inner strength and peace that the faithless do not. “their very voices and faces are different from ours; stronger, quieter, happier, more radiant. they begin where most of us leave off.…they do not draw attention to themselves. you tend to think that you are being kind to them when they are really being kind to you. they love you more than other men do, but they need you less.…they will usually seem to have a lot of time: you will wonder where it comes from” said c.s. lewis (“faith brings light to a dark world by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week 3). the role of faith in my life will allow me to find strength and harmony, and i believe i am meant to share these elements of faith with others. it is in this way that i can use my notre dame education to make a difference. these beliefs are testaments to where i am from, where i am going, and who i am becoming. it is my goal and purpose to allow my beliefs to continue to inform my choices and actions. i am confident that this goal will be reached, because i know i am exactly where i am meant to be. https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 integration two assignment 11/23/21 professor whittington a life of new encounters: my first semester of college it was a long, ten hour drive from my home in central minnesota to the city of south bend, indiana. usually in these situations one would try to take a nap or watch a movie on their phone, but i could only focus on one thing. the impending realization that college was only one day away had my heart racing with fear, sadness, excitement, and stress. although i never said anything to my mom, she repeated the same mantras including “you are going to be fine.” and “everybody feels these emotions!” while i appreciated the support, i could not take my mind off of the experience ahead. in retrospect, my fears were justified. i was about to embark on the journey of individual life with new experiences at every social, physical, and emotional interaction. during my first semester at the university of notre dame, i have asked myself hundreds of questions about the importance of my current and developing relationships, moral perspectives, and core values. throughout these encounters, i have realized that there are issues in my life that require more deliberation than i have previously given and other issues which i once stressed about but no longer view as confusing. prior to my attendance at notre dame, my perception of the purpose of college was pretty simple. i thought that the idea was to cement knowledge in core topics to prepare for the workforce. no doubt this goal has significant value, but learning to ask critical questions and finding solutions to topics that are confusing and challenging are truly the type of problems that will be presented later in life. unlike my calculus or chemistry classes, there is no set answer to the new experiences that i have faced. one main theme that is now more complex in the way that i encounter the world is through my perception of different races, religions, and cultures. although it may seem absurd to some, the amount of different backgrounds that i have seen at the university of notre dame is shockingly more diverse than anything i have seen in my life. meeting new friends and peers from fascinating places such as guatemala, nigeria, and lebanon have opened my eyes to new ways of life that are much different from the way that i have learned to view the world. taking interest in the wide array of cultural events and speakers with unique identities has given me some insight into the reasons that diversity is so cherished. although there is a lot of controversy around many racial and cultural issues, i think that a vast majority of americans cherish how differences in our souls feed the success of the nation as a whole. for this reason, a quote from a video called “with voices true” from the klau center archive on race stood out to me because it stated that “every story is a testament of personal truth (with voices true snapshot summary by the klau center archive on race moreau fye week eleven).” the excerpt is a perfect representation of how every unique story and background that i have encountered since my drive to south bend has elements of value due to the unique identity of every individual. in order to look at society in the most accurate way possible, it is necessary to gather as many stories and perspectives as possible because they each represent different fundamental truths that may not be known by the rest of the population. for this reason, it is okay to be confused at the way others perceive their surroundings because their worldview is represented by experiences shared by no others. my observations of diversity have certainly been expanded in a more nuanced manner, but not everything in my life has become more complicated. i truly believe that my faith has become significantly more clear. when my parents got divorced this summer, my world was in shambles. it was incredibly hard to keep pushing towards my dreams and goals because it felt as https://voicestrue.nd.edu/ if everything was already falling apart. throughout the summer, i tried to distract myself with hobbies such as fishing and playing videogames but these simply acted as a diversion from the sadness that i had been feeling. as a male, there is significant pressure to internalize emotions which made it impossible to bring up personal issues with my friends and family. this forced me to simply keep them hidden away from everybody. when i got to notre dame, the issue still resided in my mind but the constant exposure to the catholic church at the university helped me to turn my mind to reflection and feel more at ease with the issue. for me, a renewed faith in god was a solution to the brokenness that i felt in my heart. my encounter with the church was similar to the way that others may use exercise or creative means, such as kitsugi art, to heal their troubles in a more productive way (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by grotto moreau fye week ten). i have realized that consoling my misfortunes and heartaches does not always need to have a complex fix. relieving stress and anxiety can be as easy as the recreation of a broken pottery or reflection time in a chapel. in a world full of complexities and over simplifications, there arises a desire to find a stable emotional state which leads to the growth of character. in one of my moreau discussions, our class had a uniquely memorable conversation about imposter syndrome. it was amusing to see how many of my peers in the class expressed the effect of this psychological symptom on their own lives because i had also been feeling it. throughout my time here, i have heard people mention that their résumés were filled with perfect act scores and incredible extracirriculurs. this has definitely caused some insecurity, but it was comforting to know that i was not alone in feeling like i didn’t deserve to be among the success of others. elizabeth cox’s ted talk on the imposter syndrome gave me even more perspective into the complex issue and reflecting on some of the ways that psychology may have played a role in my previous life experiences has https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau been fascinating (what is imposter syndrome by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). in relation to imposter syndrome, it is important to remember that success should not be reflected by the values of others but instead in the fulfillment of personal goals. to model life after the influence of society will only lead to disappointment in the long run. i am going to try to ignore the pressure that society and others have put on me in order to focus on my own plan for the future and live a more fulfilling life. the implications of responding to challenges and encounters in our lives can have profound effects on our wellbeings. in life, everyone faces hardship, success, confusion, and clarity but responses to these interactions is what truly defines our characters. i think the notion that father moreau built this university without any real support from the government, the catholic church, or donors is a testament to the fact that personal grit and motivation is the most necessary trait to make change in the world (holy cross and a christian education by father james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). i am going to try to commit myself to personal goals and passions in a similar fashion as father moreau throughout the rest of my life. furthermore, it will be my mission to find greater clarity in the world while accepting that some things are out of my control. because of the great complexity in the world, i am going to use my interactions with others to create positive change rather than using narcissism to justify the idea that there is only one way to go about life. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ integration two moreau first year experience november 25, 2021 chapter 1: my ‘becoming’ story and how i define myself as a first-year student at notre dame last night i met up with my friends from high school, seeing them for the very first time again since we all left in august. “sooo….how is it alexa? is it everything you expected it to be?” my friend livvy exclaimed, as it was now my turn to share my experiences so far and give all of the updates i had neglected to text in the still very active group chat we have. this question prompted me to really think back to the little moments which have stood out the most to me during my time so far, and the people i have met along the way. before coming to notre dame, i watched an nd admissions video where the narrator posed the question of, “what is college? is it four years of school, or the start of a journey that lasts forever. is it lessons in the classroom, or lessons in life.” as simple as these words were, they stuck with me, encouraging me to challenge how i view my college experience and all that i will get out of it. stepping foot on campus in the fall, i was eager yet extremely nervous like many of my peers. before divulging myself into a new endeavour, i always like to mentally prepare for what's to come. and luckily, these days it is quite easy to do so with the help of things like youtube and of course tik tok. my mom and i would watch hours of pov: day in the life of a notre dame student or college expectations vs. reality videos just so i could get accustomed to the new life i was about to adopt. so when welcome week arrived i thought i was ready, but it was not all as glamorous as i thought. the constant ice breakers, dorm chants, forced awkward interactions with other dorms, and class introductions made me feel overwhelmed to the max. cornell sophomore emery bergman spoke about her initial transition into college saying “you can be surrounded by people but still feel alone” (“text & video: “advice from a formerly lonely college student” (emery bergmann, ny times)moreau fye week nine). this kind of encapsulated what i felt at the time. although i was surrounded by so many people and trying to talk to as many as i could, i felt isolated in such a new environment where no one really knew me, and i knew no one. although i sympathized with emiy’s feelings initially, i feel lucky that notre dame has such an emphasis on community. the community i have built within my dorm is by far the reason why i love notre dame so much. i am not exactly sure what the formula is, but the random roommate lottery worked out so perfectly for me. this type of situation really forced me to become vulnerable, and because my roommate haley and i were both in the same position, it made it easier to approach new people together. i can honestly say that the friends i consider closest at notre dame, are some of the sweetest and most genuine people, who i see continuing our relationships even after graduation. these are the people who help me get through the rigorous classes and long nights in hes, and the people i celebrate with on the weekends and game days. there are a lot of reasons to love p-dub, (the best dorm on campus of course), but above all i think p-dub is really the home to the most diverse group of people on campus, which makes it such a great community. when i think of my closest friends on the fourth floor, i see everyone as an individual puzzle piece: so unique individually but when put together it creates a perfect composition. from texas, atlanta, michigan, pittsburgh, maryland, the chicago suburbs and all the way to barcelona, spain, the different backgrounds, ethnicities, nationalities, and https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html perspectives we all possess makes our friendships so special and eye-opening. after realizing how diverse my dorm is, i wanted to be able to share the voices within it, so i signed up to be one of the junior multicultural commissioners. through this role, i had the opportunity to volunteer for the mindful training on equity, what it means to be an advocate, and on the effects of coded language. sparking conversations like this within notre dame is imperative to building a more inclusive student body where everyone feels not only accepted but embraced for every aspect of who they are. in week 10 of moreau, i read the article raising the question of if catholic schools should teach critical race theory and what catholic social teaching is. (text: “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” (christopher j. devron, s.j., america magazine)moreau fye week ten). likewise in the “diversity matters” video, kevin abbot brought up several interesting points about diversity, specifically how although there may be diversity in a particular area, it does not necessarily mean that the community is inclusive and integrative. when looking at the map of chicago, it was clear to see how there were many different ethnicities spread out amongst the city. however, the racial groups were concentrated in specific areas and still highly segregated. (video:"diversity matters!" (prof. agustin fuentes)moreau fye week eleven). through these two medias, i now believe even more than before how important the principle of inclusion is in how i lead my life. the visualization of the map of chicago was eye opening to me because it emphasized how although communities may consist of different kinds of people from different backgrounds and experiences, it is not always guaranteed that people will intertwine with one another and build an inclusive community. at notre dame, a predominantly white school, i think it is important to build a place where diversity is not clustered among various races and ethnicities. by learning about each other and becoming more exposed to https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 different viewpoints and perspectives, biases can be changed. for me, i hope to become a person that leads my dorm community and beyond by starting conversations about our different experiences and backgrounds. this semester, i have also learned to give myself grace. college is a time where there is still so much uncertainty, and i have to be okay with this. c.s lewis writes, “their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change...their nearest approach to constancy, therefore, is undulation--the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks.” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis_chapter 8.pdf -moreau fye week twelve) i think this philosophy is applicable to human nature in general , but also the true college experience. major discernment, time management, faith, and self care are all things which can seem hazy to me one day, but clear the next. at notre dame, i think it is especially important to give myself a lot of grace when things become challenging and avoid the temptation to compare myself to others. because everyone is at a different stage in their own journey, it is unfair to look to others when i want to see where i am in the bigger scheme of things. high school went so fast to me, and i know that college will go even faster, so i hope to adapt to the perspective where i work hard, but also try not to take myself too seriously. next semester i hope to practice more self care, and regardless of the result just put my best efforts into everything, and be okay with whatever the outcome is. so, how did i answer livvy’s question last night? besides flaunting the fact that i get to walk by st. joseph's lake and the golden dome everyday, i was happy to share that notre dame is truly my new second home: a community where i can see myself really making an impact in, and a place where i learn my vocation, build lifelong relationships, and write my becoming story. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192618/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23733/files/192618/download?download_frd=1 prof. espeseth moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 one semester down, seven to go as i look back and reflect on my first semester of college at notre dame, i see that there is so much that has changed in my life from when i first stepped on campus. one of the most notable things i have noticed is my perception of what i need in my college experience socially. when i first got to notre dame, i was very afraid that i would not be able to make any friends, as that is something that has always been a challenge for me. especially in high school, i had a lot of poor friendship experiences, with a lot of close friends finding other people they would rather spend time with, and ultimately hurting me quite badly. i came to college with an expectation that i needed to make new friends, but also a great fear that i wouldn’t, especially since i am not the most outgoing person and really don’t like talking to people i don’t know. looking back now, i am reminded of the quote from week 10, “when we treat community as a product that we must manufacture instead of a gift we have been given, it will elude us eternally” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). i see now that i did not need to feel like i needed to make friends right away or feel pressured to force connections. this was something i had trouble with especially the first weekend when all of us were shoed in the same room so often trying to get us to make friends. some of the best friendships i have made so far came when i wasn’t expecting it or looking for it. i have found community when i have embraced the gift that it is rather than pressure. one thing that i think has been a bit of a rollercoaster in my life while here is my faith. when i first came i thought i would maintain my faith and go to mass all the time, but in reality, it sort of faded in importance as i got overwhelmed with classes and trying to find belonging, i found myself going to mass less. but as a result, i ultimately just felt more alone, and when i tried to look for god in my life i couldn’t really find him. in week twelve we read, “he leaves the creature to stand up on its own legs--to carry out from the will alone duties which have lost all relish” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). i thought this quote was interesting. the way i interpreted it is that god is not leaving us alone for the purpose of leaving us, but rather it offers us the opportunity to stand up for ourselves and be strong. it is not abandonment but rather building our strength and giving us the opportunity to flourish by our own means. i found this really reassuring and a perspective i had sort of forgotten. that god was not abandoning me, but letting me grow on my own. i found god in my life, even in his seeming absence. one thing that i definitely thought was black and white was what major i wanted to pursue. entering college, after a summer working at the idea center, i thought i knew that i wanted to be a mechanical engineer, but as the semester progressed, i have found there are so many interesting things that i could do in life, it’s really overwhelming. mentally, i have switched between mechanical engineering, computer engineering, and probably the most confusing major that continuously confuses me and causes a monthly crisis is architecture. my great-grandpa, grandpa, and dad were all architects, and after working for five years at my dad’s architecture firm, i have always been expected to major in architecture. i chose against it because i like building things and designing things with my own hands, but it has always been something that has piqued my interest. this semester i have found the choice between architecture and engineering particularly difficult, as i see firsthand the different fun things each major gets to do, and i still feel like i am letting my family down if i don’t major in architecture. i was reminded in week nine, “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week nine). i thought this quote was really interesting. it really put into perspective how arbitrary the expectations we set for ourselves are and the ones others set for us, and how they really don’t matter at all, yet we measure our self-worth with them. instead of worrying about whether my family is upset with me or not, i’ve been trying to think about my major as whatever i will have the most fun in and do my best. with one semester almost over and seven more to go, i know it will be a long journey over the next four years, but i don’t think it has to be as hard as i initially thought. i don’t have to be perfect, i just have to do my best. i just have to go with whatever comes in my path the next seven semesters, and trust that god has a plan for me. in the end, i know it will all workout, no matter the tears or sadness or obstacles i face in the meantime. i am reminded of the quote, “without conviction, there would be no hope.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by father john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week ten). this short and simple quote i remind myself of when i’m having trouble; without conviction we would just be giving up and we would not have any hope for the future. and, after all the experiences i have had and opportunities i have seen and people i have met over the past semester, i genuinely do have hope for the future. sammie mcgurl moreau integration one learning about myself through moreau i believe that i am searching for a way to be truly authentic and belong with those that i care for and want to grow closer to. as someone who considers themselves to be an empath, i take into account the way other people feel and think and consider how it would be if i was in their same situation. i often struggle with being completely authentic because i fear how other people might see me or think of me. we as people don’t really enjoy confrontation usually, but our “shame and fear cause disconnection, even though we are scared of that disconnection” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one). i believe that it is hard to be vulnerable but that it is also ultimately essential for being able to be truly authentic. in my journey to being authentic, i must always remember everyone and everything that has influenced me, remembering that “[i] am the expert on [me]” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon – moreau fye week six). being authentic means embracing who you are and being truly yourself regardless of how you think other people may perceive you. i must always make sure that i am embracing who i am as a person because i am the only one on earth who knows everything about me, and i am certainly the only one that can be exactly who i am. no one else can possibly be me, and that is a good thing. god created me to be exactly who i am as a person, and god doesn’t make any mistakes. even though i am a human being and am therefore an imperfect person, i know god is a perfect creator, so i trust that i am exactly how i am meant to be. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by looking for relationships that “make me feel positive and like i’m investing in something long-term” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t taylor – moreau fye week four). i am always seeking to find friends that will build me up and encourage me in being truly authentic and growing myself as a better person. it has always been a priority of mine to seek out those who will build me up and encourage me to be a better person. it has always been something that i because i think it is extremely important to surround yourself with people that you want to be like, and you find worthy of imitating and listening to. the bible itself says “walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm” (proverbs 13:20). thus, we must always be careful to surround ourselves with people who will make us better and avoid spending time with those who are reckless or bad influences. if we associate with those who are good and holy people, then we can ourselves become more good and more holy, but if we choose to be around people that have a negative influence, then we ourselves will be susceptible to that negative influence. i believe that my purpose is to love others and to do my best in everything so that i can show the love of god to everyone around me. i want people to see me as a force for good in the world and someone who shines the light of god forth into the world. i want people to know that i am a christian not only by what i say but also by what i do. i want to radiate love to all people, regardless of who they are and what they believe. i want to share jesus and his love with everyone i am around. i believe that i grow by living not just for my resume but also living for my eulogy as well (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week two). although i have always wanted to have a good resume, i don’t want to be remembered as having simply completed a laundry list of accomplishments. i want to be remembered as being a good person, one who loved others and was loved for being kind to everyone. i can’t simply grow my intellect but must also be mindful of growing my heart and spirit to grow as a whole person. in order to grow my spirit and mind i must also remain strong in my faith. “it is so easy to be swept off your feet by the chaos of life, but in faith it is possible to stand firm in all things” (“student reflections on faith at notre dame” by audrey c/o ’23 – moreau fye experience week three). if we neglect our faith when things get tough or busy, then it will be exceedingly difficult to be able to achieve any growth whatsoever. thus, i must always be careful to nourish my faith in order to achieve the most personal growth possible. of course, i have always known my faith should be the utmost priority, but it is often difficult to retain that priority when life gets busy even though it should be the most important thing always, especially when life gets difficult. i believe that i must pursue truth by always looking for multiple stories and never letting a single story determine my complete idea of a person or thing or event. when we “reject a single story, we regain a kind of paradise” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau fye experience week 7). instead of believing the fist and possibly only story that i hear about something, i must look to find a complete story and seek out the full truth always. i must be careful to not assume something based on preconceived notions or based only on one thing i hear. i must always do my own research and find multiple stories to get the whole truth. i believe that my community should always know that “there is only one you” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau fye experience week 5). everyone can only be who they are and shouldn’t ever worry about trying to be anyone else. it can be really easy and even sometimes tempting to be envious of what other people do and who they are. however, if we remember that we are who we are and no one else can ever change that and that is a good thing, then in general, we will be much happier and could look forward to growth in the future. in order to grow a community, each individual must be willing to pursue individual growth and be confident in who they are as a person for the overall good of the community. if we all take small personal steps towards growth as individuals, then we, as a community, can combine all those little steps into a bigger step towards growth as a whole community. i believe that i am made to radiate love to all and to do good in the world. as i have said, god does not make any mistakes, and he chose me to be exactly how i am for a reason. he has a plan and a purpose for my life, and if i stay true to who i am authentically and always pursue truth and goodness, then i will be better able to accomplish god’s plan for my life and bring others closer to him as well. integration 2 lopez 1 professor chan 3 dec. 2021 moreau first year experience section 10 it’s about time one of the most important questions i have asked this semester is, “what should i do now?” i ask this every time i have to decide if i should eat (if, so what and where?) or if i should do homework (if so, what kind and for how long?) or if i should go to a social activity (if so, for how long should i stay? all these questions determine how much i take care of myself physically and emotionally and the extent to which i excel academically. respectively, examples are how much sleep i get, how much time i allow for fun, and if i finish my homework. this question has forced me to change the way i manage time . . . many times. some ideas for how i should spend my time have come from listening to classmates and other people relate how they use theirs. however, this led me to believe that most people were working ahead, and were therefore never as stressed as i was, scrambling to meet deadlines within minutes. i then set this expectation for myself, thinking that this was the perfect model for doing work in college. it seemed to me like if i was not working ahead, i was making a mistake somewhere. but, as i quoted in my week nine qqc, “where did the belief come from that we can never make mistakes?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). people set so many standards for themselves that they need to realize what is and is not achievable, or what goals are motivational or discouraging. for me, this https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau lopez 2 expectation was discouraging because no amount of homework i could do would be enough. it was not realistic for me to be a week ahead on chemistry homework-i did not have a strong background in chemistry like that person may have had! instead, i had to realize that only i can come up with the best way i need to work, and if something was not easy for me, it would not be working ahead in a subject. recognizing my strengths and weaknesses would allow me to see that maybe i can cut time from other places by doing my math homework first, because that freed up time to understand chemistry and really get to know the material so i could succeed. although i encountered many people who were working ahead, i also encountered people in the same situations as myself concerning the timeliness and understanding of homework. realizing that i was not the only one experiencing different things helped me feel more in community with others. “intimacy is neither possible nor necessary across this entire range of relationships. but a capacity for connectedness is both possible and necessary if we are to inhabit the larger, and truer, community of our lives” ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker j. palmer, center for courage & renewal moreau fye week eleven). in this sense, i was able to find community with others. i have encountered a great change in the decisions i give thought to. for example, in high school, i was concerned with petty things like if i should wear gold or silver jewelry that day. if i picked gold, then i might have to change my necklace to gold, but if i did not have a chain in that color, then i would have to reconsider . . . which just made me late to class in the morning for a silly reason. in my time here, where my time has become more limited than ever before, i realized that this daily question did not matter at all. i responded by deciding to wear the same earrings and necklace every day. previously, i had thought that it was not vanity. however, looking back, i think that if something like that was such an impediment to my daily life, then it http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ lopez 3 probably could have been excessive. in week twelve, i quoted, “readers are advised to remember that the devil is a liar.” (“a brief introduction to the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). justifying our actions is often easy because of lies. since picking jewelry is not really a big deal, this is just a small example of this. but, nonetheless, it made me realize that if i want to live without vanity, i can become more simple by just wearing the same kind everyday if i choose to wear it. i have spent time with and have encountered many different kinds of people, and i have been open to having lunch with classmates from many different backgrounds. the website article from week ten mentioned st. paul’s embrace of greeks and gentiles (“should catholic schools teach critical race theory?" by christopher j. devron, s.j. america magazine moreau fye week ten). this made me think about how the catholic faith sees people united as sons and daughters of god. whether greek or gentile, people were still called to turn to god, to become close to him, and listen to his voice, living out his plan for us in our daily lives. i am also called to listen to him by living a life of christian charity. i find that by being kind to others, we can share his love with others. previously, time had been something i took for granted. i think about all the time i spent on my phone or watching television in high school and think about how much i would have rather spent that time learning a skill or being productive in another way. our time is really limited, so we should do the most we can with it by putting effort into everything we do as well as always living in the best version of ourselves. time spent eating alone could be time spent learning about another person. time spent making decisions and planning for things in the future often wastes more time than doing the actual activity would have been, such as deciding where i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/files/187465/download?download_frd=1 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-black-lives-matter-240792 lopez 4 should walk in order to study. all these things have shown me the importance of time like i have never experienced before. integration 2 prof. nguyen moreau fye 3 december 2021 close encounters of the transforming kind i’ve now been at notre dame for more than 100 days. in that relatively brief time, i’ve encountered seven football games, dozens of late nights, hundreds of dining hall meals, hundreds of new faces, thousands of pages of required reading, and countless new memories. i’ve learned lessons both inside and outside the classroom. most notably, i’ve learned lessons in perfection, family, unanswerable questions, and division. prior to coming to notre dame, i had never really worked out beyond what was required in gym class—which, in the case of my high school, was more bowling and mini-golfing than actual gym—and i was pretty physically weak as a result. my friends would go to the gym pretty regularly, but i never wanted to go with them because i would feel like a misfit at the gym. i tended to look at everything with an expectation of perfection, which made me afraid of going to the gym because i knew i wouldn’t be good at it. “...expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). once i allowed myself to lose my expectation of perfection, i started working out with them and even trying rock climbing. i also joined my interhall soccer team, even though i am by far the worst on the team and the only one who didn’t play soccer in high school. even though i am basically the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau opposite of perfect in my workouts, rock climbing, and soccer skills, i have had a lot of fun participating in those activities, and it feels liberating to go outside my comfort zone. over the course of this semester, my concept of “family” has changed. previously, “family” seemed pretty straightforward and merely consisted of my blood relatives. leading up to fall break, i was really looking forward to seeing my family. surprisingly, though, while i was at home and surrounded by my parents and siblings, i still had this nagging feeling of missing my “family.” it wasn’t until then that i realized how much notre dame has started to feel like my family. after all, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by patrick j. palmer moreau fye week 11). the family that i have discovered here couldn’t have been forced; it just happened. just like my biological family has close members who i see everyday in addition to distant members who i may have never met, the family i’ve discovered at notre dame is far more complex than just my closest friends: just by virtue of being a student here, i share experiences with thousands of other students who i may only ever pass on the way to class. i’ve also faced a lot of questions that don’t have answers. in part due to my bio class, i’ve become a lot more interested in learning about cancer therapy, particularly pediatric cancer, and it’s frustrating and heartbreaking that so many kids are dying because there still aren’t cures. questions like these are similar to the troughs discussed in the screwtape letters. there may not be answers yet, but that doesn’t mean that god isn’t there: “he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks; some of his special favourites have gone through longer and deeper troughs than anyone else” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). in my spare time, i’ve started following the stories of dozens of pediatric cancer families on social media, and i’ve had the opportunity to share in their hope for a cure and share in many of their troughs http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192655/download?download_frd=1 as they mourn over children gone too soon. i need to hold onto hope that we may one day have the answers to eliminate cancer for good. this isn’t just a passive hope; i hope that i may one day be a doctor helping treat cancer patients myself. it’s so easy to get bogged down in hatred and division. in psychology, i learned about the human tendency to divide into us vs. them, which can lead to stereotypes and hatred. i’ve encountered countless benign examples of this over the course of this semester, such as temporarily despising another college during football games, establishing dorm superiority (farley is the best!), and light-hearted competition between majors. more harmfully, though, i all too often find myself silently judging a person based on their political leaning or making subconscious assumptions based on a person’s race or appearance. this creates divisions that i might not even realize are there. the divisions are fueled by these thoughts: “develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others. play the victim. blame the enemy. stoke grievance. never compromise” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). i’ve realized that i can’t control my thoughts and my automatic subconscious categorizations, but i can make the choice to treat others with compassion and always give the benefit of the doubt. these lessons i’ve learned won’t do me much good unless i continue to build on them over the next 3.5 years and the rest of my life. i will need to continue to go out of my comfort zone and challenge myself to do hard things even when i know i won’t meet my own expectations, whether that means taking difficult classes or joining more unfamiliar clubs. i will need to discover an even broader family beyond just this school, perhaps by volunteering in the wider community. i will need to continue to ask the tough questions and hold onto hope that the answers are out there somewhere if we just keep working towards them as a society. i will need https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ to actively find people who are different from myself and use our unique perspectives to work for good instead of focusing on division. if i keep all this in mind, i hope i will be able to make the next 100-plus days of college even more rewarding! mr. pruitt moreau first-year experience 15 october 2021 everyone has a unique set of beliefs that shape the ways they think, feel, and carry out life. for the past several weeks in the moreau course at notre dame, i have been able to reflect upon my beliefs, and how they have shaped my experiences. understanding and acknowledging our beliefs bring us further in touch with ourselves, and facilitates personal growth. i believe that i search for courage and vulnerability in my everyday life here at notre dame. in our first few weeks of school, we all had the opportunity to establish ourselves as individuals in a new setting. this can be scary and intimidating, but is necessary for us to have a deeper understanding of ourselves, and to reach our greatest potential. in my classes, i opened up to my peers and made meaningful, vulnerable connections with them. this took courage and risk because putting yourself out there is intimidating in itself. but, if we strive to take those risks, we can make long-lasting friendships. researcher and storyteller brene brown wisely said “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this supports the idea that we have to be our truest selves in our day-to-day interactions with others, in order to create a strong foundation for our relationships. i will continue to meet people and tasks with a sense of vulnerability, because the connections we make with others enrich our lives in profound ways. i believe that my purpose is to grow as my most authentic self by being in touch with my values. through taking the character strengths survey in moreau, i learned that i value kindness, perspective, and a love of learning. acknowledging these values gave me an understanding of how i should live my life in a bigger picture, so when i look back i don’t feel like i strayed from being my most authentic self. according to the via character strengths survey, “mastering new skills, topics, and bodies of knowledge, whether on one's own or formally; related to the strength of curiosity but goes beyond it to describe the tendency to add systematically to what one knows.” (via character strengths survey–via adult survey–moreau fye week 2). i am holding true to these values here at notre dame by pursuing research and extracurricular activities in any and every field i am interested in. i believe that i pursue truth by following my faith, and learning from other people’s stories and narratives. since coming to notre dame, i have emersed myself in the community surrounding faith and made meaningful connections with people in this community. according to a notre dame student named nyah, “faith brings us together. through god’s love, we are able to love one another deeper. that matters to me because now more than ever, our world needs unity”("student reflections on faith"–campus ministry moreau fye week 3). if we take on struggles with patience, faith, and comrodery, we are able to get through the most difficult, stressful situations. furthermore, other people’s collective stories and experiences give me a greater understanding of worldly truths. according to fr. kevin grove, “faith and reason together place us [always] in relationship with eachother”( "two notre dames: your holy cross education" fr. kevin grove, c.s.c.moreau fye week 5). we learn so much from each other, and hearing stories of faith and life experience is truly eye opening. it also is important that we address preconceived biases when hearing other’s stories. “this tendency for stereotype-confirming thoughts to pass spontaneously through our minds is what psychologists call implicit bias. it sets people up to overgeneralize, sometimes leading to discrimination even when people feel they are being fair”("how to think about 'implicit bias'"moreau fye week 7). becoming aware of the predispositions we carry is essential in eliminating unwanted stereotypes and finding truths from an even perspective. new viewpoints give us insight on controversial, dividing topics, and allow us to come together despite our differences. from here, we can pursue the difficult, confusing truths we encounter throughout our lives with open minds and hearts. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by surrounding myself with ambitious, optimistic people. i seek friendships rooted from love and positivity, so upon coming to notre dame, i sought out people with similar values. it is easy to fall into toxic, negative relationships if you put up with unfair treatment. for relationships to be successful, each person must truly have the other’s best interest at heart. according to olivia taylor, “if the majority of the things that come out of your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them. endlessly venting about work, other friends, family, relationships, or life in general could indicate that your friendship is not balanced and they don’t value your time together” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" -olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week 4). this quote is important because we must remember that the energy we are contributing to relationships has just as much impact. we need to be mindful of how our words affect those we surround ourselves with, and seek out mutual love and respect when forging life-giving relationships. i believe that i grow by experiencing different stages of life in different places. from living in 4 different locations, i have gained life experience that allows me to better myself, and achieve personal growth, all from different viewpoints. each of my “hometowns” have shaped me in ways that are unique and individually important (moreau fye week 6 assignemnt). now, being in south bend, i have grown so much emotionally, academically, and socially. a new environment (place to call home) expedites the growth process because it challenges me to reestablish routine, relationships, academic success, and hobbies. i look forward to where my journey at notre dame will take me, because i believe that it truly fosters growth in every aspect. being in such a welcoming, supportive environment inspires me to work towards my goals every day. after reflecting on my personal beliefs, i feel grateful for the opportunities notre dame provides in facilitating self-development. looking back on experiences to gain deeper understandings and perspecives is crucial in achieving personal growth, lasting relationships, and a well rounded, happy life. i cannot wait to continue my journey here, and to see how being at notre dame will shape my beliefs. david michael jefferson december 2, 2021 moreau first-year experience professor hnatusko how i respond the prompt of this paper is ‘what have i encountered and how will i respond’? this semester, moreau’s first-year experience has allowed other first-year students and me the ability to deepen our self-knowledge as it relates to our personal development and enter a new chapter of our lives as college students. however, even though the class prompted this self-knowledge and development, it has guided us and given students the tools to continue that in the future. weekly classes, discussions, and prompts have helped students deeply think about experiences and their responses to incidents. when i say experiences, i don’t mean experiences like jumping off a cliff or sky diving, but i mean anything that can help students develop and grow. in week 9, i looked at the question of how to combat setting high goals with the risk of not meeting them? in the text "why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" (julia hogan, grotto), links to an external site, the author says, “those expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (moreau week 9). this resonated with me, and sometimes, the worst criticism you can receive is from yourself. yes, self-appreciation and love are great things, but when you don’t meet the expectations you set for yourself, it can be a horrible experience. before coming to notre dame, i battled with keeping up with the academics and with all the other smart kids who go here. i set high goals for myself in the classroom, so i am pretty hard on myself when i don’t reach those goals. from this experience, i learned that putting pressure on myself did not help me but hurt my confidence and my ability to perform. in week 10, i looked at what type of community challenges notre dame faces and how could teachers help out? students at notre dame are very independent but encounter most of the same things. in the quote question comment assignment for this week, we were asked to not only look at challenges notre dame faces as a community but we were asked to look back on our communities. personally, being from a big city like dc, lots of different challenges pop up at other times. one example of a problem is the rapid gentrification that is happening in the town. the heart of dc has usually been pretty diverse, but the introduction of high-end shops and pricy housing has driven minorities to surround cities like pg county or gaithersburg. more broadly, a powerful quote from this section is, “conviction. it is indispensable to every good deed. it defies the forces of inertia — the prevailing winds and currents that fight to keep everything the way it is, or worse. without conviction, there would be no hope.” ( by rev jenkins, week 10 moreau). this directly related to what we talked about in week 11 when we were posed with the question of how to strengthen bonds in communities, especially in the midst of conflict or dissimilarity? in return, this left me with the question of how should i branch out and make new connections in the community? while reading the text, i stumbled across the quote, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (by parker j palmer, moreau week 11). this is a compelling quote with a lot of truth and meaning. yes, everyone is part of some type of community, whether they realize it or not. but to be a contributing member to that community, you have to do extra, it is not just given to everyone. personally, i have encountered feeling like i don’t belong in my community back home, but when i became a contributing member of the community, it made me feel better about myself and closer to the community. lastly, we looked at encountering hope. the reading says, “this means that while their spirit can be directed to eternal objects, thor bodies, passions and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change” (monroe week 12, a brief introduction to the screwtape letters). humans aren’t made up of just flesh and blood, but we have a soul that is capable of emotions and values like hope. while our body is constantly changing and growing, so does our soul. personally, the question of how to live and grow in hope is simply answered in the question. one can live and grow through hope. i believe that hope turns into confidence, which allows one to grow and do things they want to do or were too scared to do. you can increase your expectancy by believing in yourself and trusting that nothing is impossible. personally, i think that i am a very hopeful person, and that allows me to set future goals for myself. sometimes these goals are unreachable because of how optimistic i am, but that will enable me to push myself until i can anymore, or till i’m close to achieving that goal. even though i have only been here a few months, my experience at notre dame has affected me and is already shaping me into a better person. i feel this the most in my ability to make new friends and encounter new people. since i play baseball, practice, lifts, and scrimmages dominate my time. this would leave me vulnerable to possibly not making connections with kids in my dorm or students that aren’t on my team. but at notre dame and in moreau’s first year experience, we learned the importance of branching out and making connections with everyone. this is how i responded to the problem. i used skills and tactics that i learned to help expand my friend circle, which has benefited me as i value my connections in college. integration 2 maria finan moreau fye 14 october 2021 growing in faith our faith can help us find happiness in life. joy can be found in many things and sometimes we have to work to gain happiness. there needs to be a balance in life between work and relaxation because driving ourselves into the ground will do more harm than good. we feel good when we meet our high expectations for ourselves and “if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough. (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). there is nothing wrong with working hard to achieve goals, especially when those goals will make us better off in life and help bring us joy, but we must stay realistic as well. god made us imperfect, so we will fall short in life at times. this is not a bad thing. the best thing that we can do is pick ourselves back up and find a new challenge to conquer. i have found that prayer has helped me push through the difficult times when i am not meeting my goals. the grotto has become my safe space where i often go to have some quiet time away from the craziness of my day. i am able to take a breath and not worry about the other problems around me. i focus all my energy into my conversation with god or sometimes i just sit there and enjoy the silence and the beauty of the grotto. change is also very difficult for us as human beings. we like sticking to our routines because they feel safe to us, so moving across the country and experiencing new cultures can be shocking to us. a common response is to hide inside our own little bubble and not be inclusive of people who are different from us. this reaction will tear us apart and destroy our community. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau fr. john jenkins said, “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). our country is divided in many different ways at this moment in time. instead of hating people for being different, we should embrace the fact that we are all unique because that is what makes the united state of america such a great country. the best way to bring people together is to get out of our own comfort zone and show others that it is okay to learn about new cultures. when we learn about other cultures, we will be able to appreciate everything that makes them so unique. i have realized that we all have certain predetermined notions about other states and countries as i have met new people. while i came from a very diverse city, there are still many views that my state has about places that are not true. the notre dame community is what makes this university such a special place, but there is still so much room for improvement. i think one main thing that makes the community so special is how inviting the people are. the phrase, “welcome home,” makes everyone feel like they belong here. we can continue to build on that welcoming environment throughout our four years here. students should also realize that, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). god created us to be communal beings, so we should appreciate that gift that he has given us. the first step to appreciating the community goes back to being accepting of the people around us. just like what makes our country great, our notre dame community is great because we all have a different story and come from different backgrounds. if the community was not diverse, then we would not be able to learn from each other. when we can cordially discuss what makes us different, a lot can be learned that cannot be taught from a book or a presentation. “welcome home,” needs to be a phrase that follows students throughout their four years at notre https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ dame. this is our home and we are all one giant notre dame family. families fight and have disagreements, but at the end of the day we love and care for each other. when a family sticks together, there is nothing that they cannot overcome. life would not be worth living if there was no hope for a better and happier future. faith and hope are what get us through the hard times and they both virtues build upon each other. we can hope for a better future all that we want, but unless we do something to make that better future happen, then nothing will change. “human beings can absorb a boundless amount of knowledge and information, but if christians fail to see themselves first as people with a vocation to open their hearts to christ, then they cannot expect to change society” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week 12). the first step to making the world a better place is realizing god’s calling for us. we can do this through prayer and meditation. the hardest part of this challenge is having hope when nothing is going our way and everything seems to keep getting worse. god gives us the bad times to make us stronger and show us how truly amazing the good times are. if the world was perfect, then we would not be able to fully appreciate the good times. having hope is something i struggle with the most. i know there is always a larger plan for me and that good will always come out of the bad, but it is hard for me to admit that when i am frustrated or sad. some of my greatest memories would not have happened if it was not for bad things like covid-19 happening in the first place. god knows we can always overcome the struggles in life because he is there with us. it is just a matter of us reaching out to him and asking for help. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105431/holycrossandchristianeducation.pdf https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105431/holycrossandchristianeducation.pdf moreau integration 1 (what do i believe) 10/8/2021 moreau fys integration paper challenges, growth, and hope i believe that i struggle to find belonging in notre dame. i believe that my purpose is to spread joy. i believe that god has blessed me. i believe that i need support from healthy friendships. i believe that i will encounter much failure and growth soon. i believe that i am from parents who gave everything for me and my siblings. i believe that i want my perspectives to change. shifting to college life in notre dame posed a great challenge for me. i rarely travel and indiana is far away from my home in washington. traveling alone made me feel very lonely and i miss my home greatly. comparing myself to others has lowered my self esteem greatly. i have felt as if i am not smart enough to belong in notre dame. on my latino fyr, there was a speaker who talked about his struggles coming here and it sounded oddly familiar to my current situation. i am comforted knowing that i am not the only one struggling or who has struggled. i have found that being vulnerable with my friends, family, and others has grown my connection with others and allowed me to find more belonging. “i know that vulnerability is kind of the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness but it appears that it's also the birthplace of joy, of creativity, of belonging, and of love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). especially in my moreau class, i feel comfortable being vulnerable and expressing my struggles and this has helped me find a sense of belonging here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be i love to make others happy. when i am comfortable with the people around me, i love to make jokes. i think i have a good sense of humor and i can bring light to most situations. sometimes i can also struggle to take things seriously. i found that humor is my strongest character trait through the character strength survey (“via character strengths survey” moreau fye week two). i believe that these results are accurate because i have used jokes countless times to bring joy to others. because humor is such a strong trait of mine, i believe that i should use it as much as i can to spread positivity and joy to everyone i encounter. much of my life’s struggles root from the fact that i was raised in a low income household of seven children. i sometimes am angry at god for my family’s struggles however i always come back to him. though this situation is not ideal, i have been shown great generosity in my life and have been presented with great opportunities. i believe that these challenges have only grown my relationship with the lord. in the student reflections on faith, i connected with cheyenne’s response. she claimed that times of spiritual desolation can be perceived as a gift because they invite her to evaluate life in its current state and trust god more fully (“student reflections on faith” by campus ministry moreau fye week three). i believe that god has challenged me for my own growth and blessed me with greater faith in the long run. i believe that i have found multiple great friends in my life who will stick with me through my life. coming to notre dame made me realize how precious every moment with my friends is. an article i read for this class pointed out many toxic friendship examples such as only talking about negative things, repeated bailing, and talking behind backs (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor mareau fye week four). there have been multiple instances since arriving on campus where i have overheard gossip. it seems useless and childish to me in most cases and i am glad to know my friends have my back. having these healthy https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104133 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104153 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104153 friendships also gives me motivation in life because i hope to work hard and repay my close friends who have been so generous and supportive to me. i am currently majoring in mechanical engineering and i know the journey will be very difficult. i have talked to many engineers and they all have a common theme of terrible workloads and difficulties. as of now, i am planning to stick with the program and persevere through any struggles that come my way. i know i will face challenges that i am not used to but i know they will only make me grow stronger. my current dedication relates to the following quote, “this college will be one of the most powerful means of doing good in this country” (fr sorin letter to bl. basil moreau moreau fye week five). i know by facing any challenges that come my way, i will grow in my abilities to do good. i want to use my growth and strength to make a positive impact on this world. as mentioned earlier, i have struggled with my family situation. i now realize that i have been very ungrateful and selfish in my life. i have also falsely looked at myself as the victim of many situations. being independent and away from home has dramatically changed my perspective on my parents. writing the poem about where i am from reminded me that without my parents i would not exist and i owe everything to them (“where i’m from” poetry moreau fye week six). i now realize how much time and effort they put in to raise my siblings and i. my dad worked so much overtime and was exhausting himself so we could attend private schools. my mom spent most of her time doing home chores and taking us to places we needed to go. i am now sad about many times in my childhood where i was angry at my parents for not being able to provide for everything. instead of taking into account that my parents were doing their best to provide for the family, i was upset that i could not have everything i wanted. this is https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23692/modules/items/104174 the root of some of my life’s biggest regrets and i hope to be successful enough to repay my parents for all the love they have given me. my selfishness has also led to ignorance and poor assumptions. i have been a very judgemental person in my past and i am still working very hard to better myself. i want to respect everyone around me however i often find myself thinking upon my implicit biases when interacting with new people. my previous schools held very little diversity and this was the source of much of my close-mindedness. i have met many new people and created false images in my mind based on our first impressions. i hope to be curious and figure out people’s true stories before i try to assume who they really are. the ted talk by chimimanda adichie perfectly summed up how we all have biases and why we should not lean into them (“danger of a single story” by chimimanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week six). i loved talking to my peers in moreau about our own biases and how they have affected our relationships. my experience with notre dame and the moreau fye has made me think about and challenge my core values. in my life i have gone through many challenges and have grown so much throughout the years. i know i will continue to be challenged and still have more room to grow. i hope that my experiences will continue to change my perspective on life and help me solidify my beliefs. i will continue to put myself in uncomfortable situations and actively seek ways to understand who i truly am. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story learning through living throughout my time at notre dame so far i have grown personally, through knowing my worth and discerning my personal values. additionally, i have come to appreciate and value turning notre dame into the best community it can possibly be because notre dame is such a special place to me. this past summer before my first semester at notre dame, i had serious concerns that i was going to experience imposter syndrome. additionally, i was worried i would not be able to ease those feelings. this fear was then furthered when the instagram account first year at nd posted some advice for incoming first years. in this picture, they warned that many freshmen feel imposter syndrome, but it is a normal feeling. in moreau, we discussed these worries i had in-depth. additionally, in my usem we discussed the psychological reasoning for imposter syndrome. as human beings, we fail to understand that other people are as flawed as we are. therefore, when we experience pain and suffering due to grappling with our flaws, we overestimate our failure in comparison to others. this plays into the idea that we cannot compare our successes and lives to others, we can only compare ourselves to ourselves. as hogan stated, “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, grotto – moreau fye week nine ). this quote is crucial advice for everyone to follow. my mom always has told me that you cannot let your happiness rely on someone else. if you live your life in this way, you will never be truly happy because you are not in control of your happiness. the ted ed “what is imposter syndrome?” likewise discusses how imposter syndrome is an extremely normal feeling and one way to combat it for people to understand it is normal (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox, ted-ed – moreau fye week nine). throughout this semester, i have not experienced an overwhelming amount of imposter syndrome. i feel very competent in my classes and have been able to manage the work very well. if anything, the only thing i feel slightly insecure about is being an arts and letters major. sometimes it feels as though stem and business majors look down upon liberal arts majors. i try not to let this bother me; however, because i know that if i excel as an economics and philosophy major i have every opportunity to be just as successful as any stem or business major. overall, i have eased my concerns about my imposter syndrome in my first-semester experience. thus far on my notre dame journey, i have become more passionate about ensuring notre dame is the best place notre dame can be. recently, i have been reflecting on how notre dame could be a more inclusive community, especially regarding members of the lgbtqia+ community. the root of this issue is the fact that notre dame is a catholic institution and many of the students’ strong beliefs tied to their catholic faith. i personally believe that every single human being should be treated exactly the same no matter their sexuality or gender identity. however, this is not necessarily the overwhelming opinion of notre dame students. the following quote demonstrates the issue with some students strongly holding catholic beliefs. “conviction, however, is not all good. it can easily be corrupted by pride and greed and lead to hatred and division” ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). this quote has an extremely powerful message. conviction can be a fantastic force for good; however, many of notre dame’s issues, and the united states’ issues, are due to conviction. love and hatred are the antithesis of each other. the division seen at notre dame and the united states can be attributed to people's strong convictions grounded in hate rather than love. in order to make notre dame and the united states a more inclusive place, we all must first ground our convictions in love. in general, catholic ideals can aid the division at notre dame and the united states because those are grounded in love. for example, a catholic ideal that i appreciate is the idea that everybody is made in the image of god. if notre dame applied this ideal to every aspect of notre dame, then notre dame would be a more inclusive place for members of the lgbtqia+ community. for example, in my usem we discussed how parietals almost dismisses the existence of homosexuality and transgender students at notre dame would face many challenges due to dorm life. i love notre dame, so i want to help make notre dame as inclusive of a place as possible and this would be an important step to take. along with my desire to improve notre dame itself, i think it is important for everyone at notre dame to reflect and improve themselves. for example, i think it is important for notre dame students to reflect on their own implicit biases so that they can promote diversity because otherwise that causes hate and division in the world. this quote truly reflects those ideals; “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer, center for courage and renewal – moreau fye week eleven). this quote demonstrates why there is division and prejudice against other groups. in my psychology class we learned about how people demonstrate a strong in-group preference and strong out-group discrimination, even if the group assignment is random. it is very easy to feel connected to a community where everyone thinks and acts like you, or at least you perceive that as so. therefore, we must individually work to embrace people from the out-group in order to promote diversity. by inviting people from different backgrounds to engage, then we all can learn and love each other. by doing this, society can progress as division decreases. obviously, the united states is far from being as diverse as it should be. in my usem we discussed how there are barely any people of color involved in peer review of scientific research demonstrating how widespread discrimination still is and how extensive the lack of diversity in america is. ultimately, while being at notre dame, i feel as though great value has been provided to my life by attending a catholic university. i was raised catholic, however, i do not still practice as a catholic. however, i still greatly value the ideals of catholicism. specifically, i identify with the value of hope. “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know” (“hope holy cross and christian education” (pdf) pages 14 16 by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. – moreau fye week twelve). this quote is important to me because hope is super important for everyone to have. in order to cultivate yourself into an excellent person, you must take risks. furthermore, when you take risks, you must have the hope that everything will be ok no matter what. even if you do not personally believe that there is a god, you can still have the faith that everything will turn out good. that is also why the idea of hope is so appealing to me. hope is a very universal concept that everyone can identify with. as the screwtape letter states, a way to combat evil is to find god and have hope even when you cannot see god (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). this can be applied to everyone’s life. when life is hard, you should have the hope that someday life will be good again. week 13 integration 2 discovering claire during the second half of my first semester at notre dame, i have been able to fully adjust to my new home and branch out on campus. the ideas and decisions that were unclear to me earlier in the semester have now become clear. the expectations that i set when entering college have decreased in importance. when i first arrived at notre dame, i expected that i would find my place and make friends quickly. however, during my first few weeks, most of my interactions with other people never went past basic introductions. as a result, i became frustrated and tried to force myself to socialize with others all the time. this caused me to become even more frustrated with myself because i felt like i was the reason why no one wanted to be friends with me. however, after reading the article “advice from a formerly lonely college student” and discussing it with my classmates in moreau, i realized that other students also felt the same way. moreover, i recognized “how ridiculous my expectations were for my first year” (advice from a formerly lonely college student by emery bergmann moreau fye week 9). instead of trying to fulfill my expectations, i am working on doing things i actually want to do during my time at college, and i have found that it is easier to make friends when i am not constantly trying to form friendships. as i enter a new semester, i plan on not bringing many irrational expectations that will only result in disappointment. throughout this semester, my mental health and wellbeing have increased in importance more than academics. the discussion in class on imposter syndrome and brokenness gave me perspective on the importance of personal wellbeing. i learned that other students also had similar thoughts that they were not good enough or that everyone else was always doing better. i realized that the pressure i put on myself for “[not] meet[ing] the expectations [i set for myself]” was not worth it ("what is imposter syndrome? by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). as a result, i have started to give myself breaks and time to do things i enjoy. for example, i have tried to go to swim club practices at least twice a week. the process of putting less emphasis on my grades and placing importance on my mental health parallels the art form “kintsugi” ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by grotto, kirsten helgeson moreau fye week 10). the negative effects of imposter syndrome on my mental health are the broken pieces of pottery, while the recognition of my imposter syndrome and healing of my mental health is like putting the pieces of pottery back together. however, i am still working on my healing process and overcoming imposter syndrome because self-doubt still creeps in sometimes. one of the choices i struggled to make this semester was whether i wanted to stay in the honors program or leave. throughout the semester, i have gained greater clarity on my decision. during the first two months of the semester, i wanted to leave the program immediately because i felt out of place in the honors classes. the honors classes are all seminars, so it required me to do a lot of readings and participate in class discussions. being in the seminar-based classes put me “beyond [my] comfort zone” (hope holy cross and christian education by fr. james b. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ king, c.s.c. moreau fye week 12) because i had never experienced learning based on discussion rather than lectures which is what i am familiar and comfortable with. i talked with my advisor about wanting to leave the program and she supported my decision, but also encouraged me to stay in the honors classes a little longer to see if i would start to enjoy them. as the semester progressed, i worked on being more engaged in class discussions and met with my professors. now, looking back at how i felt at the beginning of the semester i realized that i was just not used to a new way of learning. i think that by putting yourself outside of your comfort zone you can discover new things about yourself because my honors classes are now my favorite classes. this past week, i met with my advisor and decided to stay in the honors program. i think that by staying in the program i will continue to be challenged to learn outside of my comfort zone. how can diversity be fostered at notre dame without being forced? i was prompted by week 11’s content to ask this question. at notre dame, there are students from all over the world, which allows us to all gain “exposure and access to different viewpoints and life experience” ("diversity matters! by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11) from interacting with other students, yet i have noticed that biases and stereotypes have not changed among students. during my time at notre dame so far, i have encountered instances where i feel like i am unacknowledged in certain situations. at an asian american association club meeting, i talked about how i felt ignored sometimes and found out many others felt the same way. i believe that other students are not purposely ignoring or being unreceptive to me, instead i think that the difference between my life experience and theirs makes them uncomfortable, so they resort to familiarity: only interacting with students with similar backgrounds. based on these reflections, i think that the answer to my question is: “receptivity involves inner work” ( "thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moureau fye week 11). in order to foster an environment where diversity can be maintained, the students and faculty of notre dame need to be open to exposing themselves to different perspectives and have the willingness to change their biases or preconceived ideas. in my four years at notre dame, i hope to help people recognize that diversity is not just the state where there are people of various backgrounds, instead it is the willingness of an entire community to accept people of different backgrounds and make them feel like they belong. college has been a time of self-discovery for me. i have learned new things academically and about myself in just one semester. i hope i can continue this journey of self-discovery and improve myself. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ week 8integration 1 my journey to find what i believe in among millions of meaningless philosophies and a whole lot of false prophets to start to talk about what i believe and what i’ve learned through my experience at notre dame, i’d like to start with what we did in week three, talking about how faith informs the way i see the world and how that has developed here at notre dame, a school where faith is intertwined with a strong liberal arts education. we’ve seen this in father pete’s talk (“the role of faith in our story” by the campus ministrymoreau fye week three) and also in the talk about two notre dames (two notre dames: your holy cross education by the campus ministrymoreau fye week 5). i’ve been raised catholic, however, i’ve never been particularly religious. i think i’ve actually become less religious at notre dame. during my first week here, after going to church for the first time since my sister's first holy communion (she’s only nine years old so it wasn’t that long ago), i realized that the experience of church isn’t an experience i found meaningful, even if i was to believe that god exists. i feel like the time, effort, and money spent on church could be better spent carrying out god's word through the world and helping others. i don’t see the purpose in chanting prayers and literally preaching to the choir instead of using those devoted people and resources to give shelter to the homeless and heal the sick. i think the whole idea of having huge, expensive monuments for buildings is antithetical to the anti-materialist message that is supposed to be spread here. people need to practice what they preach (another cliche, i know), but i believe that how devoted a person is to going to church has really very little correlation with being devoted to being a good person. i feel like religion and devotion to god is for too many people a type of moral high ground that replaces them actually acting morally. i think this moves towards a discussion of what the truth actually is, like we discussed in week 7 and read about through articles about bias. (“how to think about implicit bias“ by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. dorrismoreau fye week 7) in my qqc i wrote a lot about recognizing bias and specifically confirmation bias. i believe religion is no different; god is a way for people to interpret morality. i think these concepts of purpose and morality are not objective in any way shape or form. there is no right or wrong answer, and i feel like the idea of there being an objectively right answer is wrong, and pushing your idea of the right answer upon others is a bad habit that i see in a lot of overly religious people, and even something that i see through notre dame mandating two theology classes to people regardless of their religious beliefs or lack of religious beliefs. i’m not personally bothered by classes (in concept, i haven’t taken the classes yet so who knows), but i just think it’s definitely a valid viewpoint. i think a more interesting point is that since there is no objectively right way to view purpose or morality, i believe religious codes should always be flexible and open to new perspectives and opinions. i’d be surprised to meet a person who lives and believes everything in the bible; i think that person would be very strange in today’s day and age. people choose what parts of the bible to believe, and these choices are made by a person, and sometimes from their confirmation bias, but not from a higher power. religion is something that a person chooses to believe in and it’s something that comes from the person more and less from the bible, and saying that what the bible says is absolute and correct is something that i don’t believe in. in a way this essay is my personal creed, my variant of christianity. so what do i believe? well i tried to cover how my upbringing made me develop my own beliefs in my where i’m from poem based off of our content from week 6. (“where i'm from” by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwoishttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwoishttps://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html george ella lyonmoreau fye week 6). i think i have pretty distinct opinions on a lot of topics, so i’ll just go through a few of the topics we covered in our moreau class over the weeks. in week one we talked about the power of vulnerability. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i think closeness within relationships is often created through vulnerability and it is important to be vulnerable to show your most true version of yourself. i think any healthy relationship si one where both parties are able to be true to themselves and are able to both show the other person their flaws and accept the flaws of the other person. of course, there are many other things that go into a healthy relationship, but this is a specific topic that i find very important. we also talked about recognizing red flags in week four (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by grotto moreau fye week 4). in week two we took a survey about our character traits and even took a survey about being your authentic self, and this is also extremely important in relationships. (“via character strengths survey” by via institute on charactermoreau fye week 2). i think these types of character surveys, even when done well (which this one was not) are actually pretty bad for people because people have personalities that aren’t able to be boiled down into 60 questions that rank 20 traits. i think a character quiz to find which harry potter house you are cna be fun, and one designed by psychologists can tell you about yourself a little, but overall one that focuses on your strengths and weaknesses on 20 almost unrelated topics can actually be unhealthy by misleading people into believing they are something that they aren’t or ranking them low on a quality when they actually are good, or just giving people insecurities about their weakness rather than helping them identify their flaws. just to sum it all up, i’ve thought that my purpose and what i believe in was something i should come up with for myself, and that it really doesn’t have to do much with theology or religion at all. i have goals i want to accomplish in life, and i believe my purpose here is to have fun and cherish life, and to help other people and contribute to something bigger than myself. i see so many problems in the world, and i want to help fix them or inspire others to help fix them. i want to leave the world better than i left it, so that when my journey here is written down, it’ll make for a book with a happy ending that i can look back on and say that it was good. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register?registerpagetype=popup intregration 2 david lassen moreau fye 3 december 2021 the lived experience of open-mindedness in my first few months at notre dame, i have had the opportunity to be or refuse to be open minded. whether that comes to academics, interacting with friends, or trying new things, i have found that i am often choosing between being open or close minded. in my time here, and hopefully in the future, i am looking to explore ways to expand my horizons. one way that i have tried to be more open-minded is by exploring different careers and majors. “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). while i believe that my parents have been very good about placing realistic expectations on me for my whole life, i feel that i have not set realistic expectations for myself. i am a very goal oriented person, so if i set out an objective for myself, i sometimes feel like a failure if i don't accomplish it. when i came to college, i was firm in my belief that i wanted to be a doctor. since i was in my early years of high school, i developed a strong interest in medicine, so i did everything that i could to prepare myself for a career in that field. i volunteered at hospitals, shadowed doctors, and overloaded my schedule with science classes. while i still enjoy all of that and still have a strong interest in medicine, after coming to notre dame, i realized the sheer abundance of careers out there. although i am still on a pre-med track, i keep telling https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau myself that the most important thing is that i find a career that i am passionate about. if that career is medicine, great. if it isn’t medicine, that doesn’t mean i’m a failure. during my first semester of college, i’ve already met a ton of people who have completely changed their path and are so happy about it. so, in the future, i want to make sure that i am keeping my options open and reminding myself to be kind to myself. the most important thing is to be happy and passionate about what you are doing, not to fulfill goals that don’t fit with your mentality anymore. as well as trying to have a positive and open mind about my academic life here at notre dame, i have also tried to lead a life with love rather than hate. when discussing the power of hate in a commencement address, fr. jenkins notes “we seem not to see the danger. as augustine wrote in his confessions, ‘it is strange that we should not realize that no enemy could be more dangerous to us than the hatred with which we hate him.’” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week ten). the quote from st. augustine that fr. jenkins spoke about in his commencement speech speaks to a principle that i have tried to align with as much as possible in the past few months. before coming to notre dame, my best friend just started ignoring me one. we were never in a fight or anything, she just decided one day that she didn’t want to be friends anymore and stopped talking to me. understandably, that caused a lot of pain for me and i was angry for a long time about that. i realized though, that the only person i was hurting by being angry was myself. being angry wasn’t going to change my friend’s mind, it was only making me feel upset all the time. so, when i came to notre dame, i made a promise to myself that i would try to be kinder to myself and to not take everything so personally. i am glad that i went into college with a positive outlook, because the whole process of making new friends in https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ college can be challenging. you are trying to put your best self forward while also trying to find genuine friends, which isn’t easy. i have been lucky enough to find a good group of friends here fairly quickly, but i want to continue the philosophy of pouring out love rather than hate. while it not only makes others feel more comfortable around you, being loving helps me feel happier with myself. obviously when coming to a new environment, such as college, you are going to be surrounded by new people with different experiences, which i think is a great opportunity to explore new avenues. in a lecture about the importance of diversity, agustin fuentes states that “exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change” (“diversity matters” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven). coming to notre dame, i was very aware of the fact that this school would be far less diverse than i was used to. i went to a fairly diverse high school, and i was always so interested to hear about the different backgrounds and cultures that shaped my classmates’ viewpoints. a large number of the students here are white, catholic, upper-middle class families, which can really limit the perspectives that we are able to hear about. while i think it is vitally important that the university increases the amount of diversity in our community, i have definitely encountered people at college who had very different life experiences than i did, regardless of their race or gender. i know people now who grew up on farms, in big cities, in red states, in blue states, and so much more. regardless of physical diversity, i have had to navigate interacting with people who are very different than i am. i think, no matter what, it is important to recognize that your experience is not the same one everyone else had. in the future, i really want to try and approach these interactions with love and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 understanding. while i of course want to be welcoming to people of all races, genders, and the intersectionality of these things, i think it is also important for me to recognize that being understanding of people who didn’t grow up in diverse environments is also important. it’s impossible to have a loving community without being willing to help people grow. lastly, i have tried to be open-minded about what my day to day life will look like in college. i have realized that i cannot always expect to be living a picture perfect life, which is why it is important to rely on people around you. in a satirical piece, c.s. lewis’s characters discuss the human experience of these ups and downs: “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty. the dryness and dullness through which your patient is now through are not, as you fondly suppose, your workmanship; they are merely a natural phenomenon which do us no good unless you make good use of it.” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve). even though this quote from the screwtape letters is supposed to be lighthearted, i think it carries a very important message. already in college, i’ve gone through periods where i’ve felt extremely happy and focused, but i’ve also had days where i haven’t. i also recognize that my friends and classmates have these types of days too. we can’t expect that every single day is going to be perfect, or that it is not normal to have bad days. in the future i want to make sure that i am being kind to myself when i have bad days and to remember that bad days make you appreciate the good days more. i think it is important to be vulnerable and open when you are having a bad day so that others understand that they are not alone. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190607?module_item_id=107421 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190607?module_item_id=107421 beauty from ashes in light of the content from weeks 9 through 12 in my moreau course, along with my personal experiences here at notre dame, i have identified several challenges i’ve encountered since arriving on campus and have spent some time discerning how i will respond to each of these difficulties. this semester turned out to be a lot more challenging for me socially and emotionally than i had expected. in my mind, i assumed that college was going to be some kind of utopia where everything was fun, exciting, and fulfilling. i also figured that i would fit seamlessly into campus life and would quickly find my core group of friends. however, this is far from how my first semester played out. within the first week of school, i ran into some significant health challenges. i suffered from multiple respiratory infections that took me weeks to recover from. when i was nearly over these, i received a concussion at a home football game after being hit by a hard plastic bottle thrown by someone in the upper seats. overall, i think i am now just approaching having more well days than sick days on campus. this experience has left me feeling very discouraged. while i definitely have made some good friends here at notre dame, i feel like i have yet to find my core group of friends with whom i share deep connections with just like those i had in high school. additionally, as an introvert who suffers with anxiety, it has been difficult for me to put myself out there socially. this lack of true connections has caused me to feel lonely at times on campus. however, watching emery bergmann's video made me aware that this process takes significant time and that i am not alone in feeling this way. according to emery, it is necessary "for people to be open about isolation on college campuses" ("advice from a formerly lonely college student" by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). this feeling of isolation is one that every incoming freshman will face at some point in time. it was somewhat foolish of me to think that i could make strong friendships within such a short amount of time when these types of relationships at home took years to cultivate. bergmann’s video and our class discussions have made me more open to the fact that, while i may feel lonely at times, i will eventually find my core group of friends here at notre dame. this fact excites me and although i’ve been disheartened by my experience so far, i am looking forward to my next semester under the dome. i do however know that finding my core group of friends will require me to step out of comfort zone and put myself out there. marinating in this uncomfortable area is something i’ll need strength to get through. i am aware that i must rely on the lord's help here. as noted by rev. james king, leaving our "comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know" ("holy cross and christian education" by rev. james king moreau week twelve). but i must trust that by giving my insecurities to god and asking for his strength, i will work through my anxiety and find those connections that will offer me the happiness and feeling of belonging i am craving. through prayer, i’ve also come to understand that god is using my anxiety to teach me to rely on him more. i need to stop worrying over things that are out of my control and start trusting in the fact that god will work every detail out for my good. another challenge i faced when arriving to campus was the urge i felt to fit in with the people around me. when i got to notre dame, i quickly learned that i was only 1 of 2 practicing freshman catholics in my section of my residence hall. additionally, the majority of my hall section consumes alcohol, which i choose not to do. while i don't exactly mind that people https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/files/189390?module_item_id=106224 drink, i feel like i don't connect as well with them when they are drunk and i am sober. so, this situation has also made it difficult to forge those connections with people that ultimately result in deep friendships. although people are cool with my decision not to drink, some guys in my section have tried to get me to join in. julia hogan shares my current view that i shouldn't "look for others for approval or for directions for how to live your life. look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to" ("why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit" by julia hogan moreau week nine). essentially, julia argues that i shouldn't compromise my personal beliefs in order to fit into the crowd. while it took me a while to fully accept julia's advice without feeling left out of the social scene on campus, i ultimately learned that following my moral compass not only gives me peace of mind but also allows me to share my authentic self with others. this latter point will help me as i search for fulfilling friendships here on campus. another factor that i realize is playing a part in my quest to find a friend group is the implicit bias i have toward others. when most people think of implicit bias, they think of racial bias. however, my implicit bias stems from religion and alcohol use. i assumed that all people that consumed alcohol loved to frequently party and that non-religious people lacked the morals that i viewed as vital. i have learned though, that these assumptions are grounded in bias and aren't true. in my quest to find people more like me, i joined a religious club called iron sharpens iron. while these students share and live out my same faith, it didn't take long for me to notice that we had many differences in personalities and varied interests across the board. it’s actually been really fun to experience how these differences are expanding my views and eradicating many implicit biases that have been rooted in me. as parker palmer notes, you "need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration" ("thirteen ways of looking at community" by parker palmer moreau fye week eleven). palmer’s words highlight the fact that most of the friends i’ve made here on campus are actually quite different from me. i find that these differences make conversations much more engaging. being exposed to the varying life experiences and backgrounds of notre dame students has been a true growth opportunity for me. as i continue my time here, i’m look forward to making deeper friendships with people who allow me to broaden my view of the world and challenge me to let go of my implicit biases. one final issue that i've battled with since coming to campus is the grief of losing my grandfather that i’ve finally let myself experience. a couple of years ago, i suddenly lost my grandfather, whom i called papa. he was my best friend. he had an engineering mind like me and was also a great catholic role model who lived his faith out daily. when he died, i was devastated. since he passed at the start of my final exam week, i didn’t really have time to process my feelings. i quickly buried my grief after the funeral weekend and went straight back to school. although my parents and teachers wanted me to take some time to sit with my emotions, i was scared to do that. i kept myself busy with schoolwork, my social life, and the celebrations of senior year. as a result, when i walked onto notre dame’s campus in august, i had yet to fully deal with this life changing grief. here in college, i finally had some alone time where my feelings started to come to the surface. already going through the big change of living on my own, i really fought having to come fact to face with the grief i pushed deep down inside to avoid. it wasn’t really until kristen helgeson's interesting take on kintsugi, that i realized my response to my grief was really unhealthy. kristen made it clear that she "want[s] people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ and expand" ("women find healing through kintsugi workshop" by kristen helgeson moreau fye week ten). i found this view to be really foreign at first because i’m used to hiding my deep feelings from others. however, i now see that my grandfather’s death allowed me to grow as a person. i learned how much i value the role model my grandfather was to me and how that is his legacy to me. i will forever strive to emulate my papa and be a person who lives out his faith and leaves the world a better place than it was when he entered it. due to his sudden death, i also learned just how fragile life is. despite the fact that this realization plays a part in my anxiety, i know that it’s a very critical lesson to learn. it allows me to enjoy the gift of life much more and to be more grateful for all the blessings god has, is, and will continue to give me. although the reality of my first semester here at notre dame was nowhere close to what i had expected, i am very hopeful that the lessons i’ve learned over the past several months will help me paint a different experience going forward. trusting more in god and his plan for me, continuing to rely on my moral compass, being open to the opportunity to make friends with diverse experiences and beliefs, and celebrating the growth in character and gratitude that can come from heartbreak are critical tools that will help me reshape my future path at notre dame and beyond. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ integration 1 final rooted in faith and love in light of the content from weeks 1 through 7 in moreau class, along with my personal experiences both at and leading up to my arrival at notre dame, i have identified three root beliefs that will guide me on my journey to heaven. first, i believe that i grow personally by building my character through the traits that truly matter to god. in my opinion, there are two types of traits: those that glow on a resume and those that truly define the essence of a person, which david brooks likes to call “eulogy virtues”. however, as brooks notes, we happen to live in a society that favors the characteristics in life that build successful businesses rather than those that build unique human beings ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy" by david brooks moreau fye week two). eulogy virtues are the only ones that will be celebrated and remembered when i die. these are also the virtues that i will be measured against when i stand before god at my final judgement. have i been selfless and kind? have i exhibited a servant’s heart? i believe that these are the critical virtues that must truly define me. throughout my high school career, it sometimes felt like my only goal was to earn impeccable grades so i could get into a top university and purse a successful career in engineering. while this pursuit is not necessarily a bad thing, it caused me to divert my attention away from strengthening important eulogy virtues. yet, upon arrival to notre dame i have been challenged to follow a path that leads me in a better direction. though i still strive to earn good grades, it has become more obvious to me that the development of my eulogy virtues must be a priority. during a casual conversation with my ra, i discovered that job interviewers place a lot more importance on the applicant’s personality than i had known. while many people may have the skills required for a specific job, it is ultimately a well-rounded individual who secures the position. i walked away from this conversation much more motivated to break from my gradefocused habit. since then, i have joined a compass group where we help each other through our struggles and plan to join habitat for humanity where we construct houses for people to live. in addition to altering my tunnel focus on grades, i’ve also been challenged to reexamine how i choose to portray myself to others. dr. brene brown notes that the difference between those who have a strong sense of love and belonging versus those that do not is that the former believe that they are "worthy of love and belonging" ("the power of vulnerability" by brene brown moreau fye week one). to live a wholehearted life, we need to have compassion towards ourselves and understand that it truly is fine not to be liked by everyone. whenever i am thrown into a new situation with people i do not know well, my natural inclination is to seek conformity and acceptance. yet, many times i’m left feeling a bit on the fringe despite being part of the group. when i came to notre dame, i was tempted to follow this familiar pattern. however, during a lecture during welcome weekend, professor collon told us that in order to be successful, you have to let go of others' opinions about you and act as your own unique self. in fact, true friendships only come when you are being authentic. this insight gleaned in my time so far at notre dame has allowed me to make genuine friendships. my friday nights are not always spent at dorm parties but sometimes include retreats with faithful catholic friends from my religious group. i can proudly say that these people are friends with me and not some idealized version of me. when this authentic frame of mind is combined with my desire to cultivate eulogy virtues, i believe that i can truly grow my character in a way that pleases god. secondly, i believe that my purpose in life is to enrich my heart so that i will be fully prepared and welcomed into god’s kingdom. my desire to make a priority of tending to my heart has grown having learned why our university was founded. according to father grove, father moreau "founded holy cross to remind the world that the best of what you and i were created to be is made manifest when every capacity of our intellects and calls of our hearts are both augmented by faith and reason" ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by father grove moreau fye week five). father grove makes it clear that we cannot grow as individuals unless we cultivate both the mind and the heart. if we forsake our spiritual growth, we will fall well short of becoming the individuals god created us to be. this holistic “mind and heart” focus is truly unique to notre dame as most universities educate the mind at the expense of the heart. my new home under the dome isn't just any ordinary place. it is uniquely special in the fact that it prepares us to reach our final home in heaven. during welcome weekend, our o’neill welcome committee took us out to father sorin's grave and told us "you didn't choose notre dame, notre dame chose you." this powerful statement gives me a sense of purpose. since coming to campus in august, i feel that my heart has grown immensely through hall masses, grotto trips, and retreats. i will continue to utilize these faith-based experiences to further cultivate my heart over the next four years. professor david fagerberg highlights a critical fact when he states, "spirituality concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it" ("faith brings light to a dark world" by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). in other words, faith must be lived out through our everyday lives and not just once a week at church. yet, living out god's ways is not always easy in this secular world. personally, i ran into many spiritual roadblocks during my time at high school since most of my classmates weren't practicing christians. it took a lot of courage for me to walk into my high school wearing ashes on my forehead and explaining to my friends that it wasn’t a smudge mark but an intentional sign of repentance for my sins. although living out my faith at notre dame is so much easier, i still run into some spiritual roadblocks such as choosing between going to a section dinner or taking a much-needed trip to the grotto. living out my faith is a priority in my life so i must continue to work on choosing paths that allow me to advance in my faith journey and ultimately grow closer to god. finally, i believe that my community should make sure everyone is treated with respect and dignity. friendships are one of the best ways to boost your self-esteem. according to olivia taylor, friendships should be "knowing you're both growing to be better people and that you're helping each other get there" ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia taylor moreau fye week four). however, in light of olivia taylor's article, toxic friendships still exist as well. red flags such as control and intimidation shouldn't be ignored in any relationship. someone should always act if they notice any toxic elements that is adversely affecting someone and possibly putting them in danger. this act of neighborly love has the power to offer the courage needed for someone to leave a relationship. i have witnessed a few toxic friendships in my high school years and have urged those involved to get out immediately before the abuser can inflict significant emotional damage. usually, the most difficult part of an abusive relationship is leaving it, so immense support is needed during these situations. should i witness any toxic relationships here at notre dame, i will again be there to support the victim. respect and dignity also come in the form of destroying stereotypes and broadening our views of another group of people. chimamanda adichie highlights this in her explanation of a “single story” which she defines as one that shows a group of people in one set of eyes. she says that these "stories have been used to dispossess and malign" ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda adichie moreau fye week seven). these types of stories show disregard for the uniqueness of the individual and instead clump people together with the goal of highlighting a flaw. whether or not that flaw is true, it is not the complete story of the group. gratefully, i’m at a university that works to ensure that each of its students is seen and valued for the stories that make up their unique self. the simple ice-breaker games and small group discussions have helped me to see beyond the single story of each person i’ve met. i’ve started to really understand and appreciate the idiom of “peeling away the layers of an onion” as i’ve learned and been surprised by some of the unique qualities of fellow students. it’s been exciting to learn about my korean friend who has to take a year break from college to fight in the army. i look forward to continuing to connect with people here at notre dame on a deeper level that respects and values the richness of each individual. the root beliefs of growing personally through strengthening traits that matter to god, enriching my heart through the cultivation and care of my personal relationship with god, and ensuring those who god puts in my life are treated with dignity and respect, are the fundamental principles that define who i am. i believe that these three root beliefs will help dictate my behavior, allow me to understand what is right in the eyes of god, and be my unwavering guide as i journey through this life to the next. overcoming obstacles through experience expectations, hope, community, brokenness. these 4 topics described the hearts of the last 4 weeks of moreau, and looking back, i understand why they were grouped for the end of the semester. reflecting upon the last few days alone, i feel as though i have been in november for the last 5 months, not just 5 weeks. college truly is hard; and learning that was difficult for me. the things i have experienced in the last semester prepared me for what is to come in many ways… expectations. expectations have always been a large part of what i would constitute as my success in school. i held the highest expectations for myself almost to prove what i was capable of to my own consciousness. i have fought with denial and low self-esteem before; and never once did i let it take over me. however, that has always been where it stopped: overcoming the negative thoughts by working hard and exceeding expectations. the last few weeks have taught me that the way things worked in years prior simply does not hold up anymore. i may hold expectations for myself that simply cannot be achieved. i also learned that professors may hold expectations to you that you cannot define yourself by. what really highlighted this for me was in week 9: “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life,” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). this quote truly speaks to the idea of living your own life, something that i struggled with when i was younger. i was always worried about what my parents thought, what my teachers thought, etc, when i should have been worried about what i wanted. in the future, i will continue to create expectations that are not only doable, but also things that i want for myself. hope. i want to start this section with a quote: “as long as he lives on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty,” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). essentially, as long as we live, we must both enjoy the givings of life while those same things can be taken away in an instant. living leads to the highest of highs and the lowest of lows, and we must remember that both occur. that is the essence of hope, that we may know that good comes as well as the bad being experienced. i have experienced in these last few weeks grades that i have never seen as low as before, but i have also scored grades that put me above my classmates numerous times. hope has kept me moving forward. as my mom puts it: “college will chew you up and spit you out, and you need to hope for the best to truly enjoy it.” community. building a community around yourself was at the heart of this week of moreau. communities need a few things to be successful: diverse ideas, mutual respect, and a love for progress. diverse ideas can come in many ways; at notre dame, i have found them occurring due to the international and first generation students. many international and first generation students that i have met have been extremely grateful to have the opportunity to even be here (something we can all learn from) and they also tend to bring new cultures and routines that i have not experienced. for example, my roommate, lucca, is from southern brazil, and sometimes he tells me about what he used to do at home that is different from here. in addition, we bond over our collective hatred of the bipolar weather of the midwest. on the topic of first year students, i believe the material from this week said it best with, “they get to create a story that’s never existed here on campus,” (“diversity matters!” by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11). mutual respect forms from just seeing others for what they are human beings. taking prior misconceptions about race, class, appearance, and anything else and hearing someone for who they are is the only way to make progress. ideas can sprout from anyone, and ignoring one person might be the downfall of a community due to their potential for success. a love for progress is simply a result of the last two ideas, as wanting to make progress is nearly implied by listening to others and encouraging diverse ideas. overall, communities do not simply do better with diversity, they thrive with it in a way that a non-diverse community cannot. brokenness. in my own life, things do not simply go smoothly all of the time. there always has to be a hiccup. a slip-up. a break in the path. through these, i still prevail and get through it. however, it has not always been easy to do. i believe life to be one giant marathon, and every section of your life is some region of the marathon. maybe highschool is the straightaway, with some issues like birds or slowdowns but overall coasting. maybe middle-school is the uphill slope, with bad haircuts and terrible social skills causing it to feel painfully long. no matter what running metaphor i use, it can be agreed that life is hard. not many want to admit it, but everyone struggles. as the material stated, “even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive,” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). god’s plan may be for you to be some amazing doctor, lawyer, or other profession, but that does not mean he will make it easy. jenkins may be talking to seminary students, but the quote applies to everyone’s lives. he wants us all to realize that no one has an easy life, no matter how easy they make it seem, and journeys are shared together. this connects back to the community section; at nd, i have found that in my “broken” occasions i have found peace through my friends and dorm. there is always someone who has experienced what you are going through, and utilizing them to help yourself is the best way to overcome brokenness. that, and using hope, your community, and setting your expectations up for success. integration 1 what is success? i believe that my self worth should come not from my success in my academic, athletic and other endeavors but instead from the way that i treat the people around me on a daily basis and how i maintain positive relationships with the people i care about. i know that at times i definitely tend to get wrapped up in my achievements and success. i find myself often controlled by the stress of getting good grades or being the most successful at certain things. this often comes from thinking that i am not good enough or that i am “not worthy”. from week one, brenne brown’s video talked about the power of vulnerability. she discussed how the only way we are able to make deep and meaningful connections is through being vulnerable. through her research, she found that the only difference between people who were able to form deep meaningful connections and those that were not is them believing that they are worthy of it. i think this has been something that i need to work on. i have often felt that i have to prove myself or achieve certain things “in order to be worthy of love and connection”, but she makes the point that we are all worthy of it if we just allow ourselves to believe that (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). along with this, i think that our culture has tended to prioritize the “adam i” state of mind, where we are solely focused on our accomplishments. in the video “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” he discusses this issue and makes the point that we should try to put more time into our adam ii. our adam ii is formed not by building on your strengths (like adam i), but “by fighting your weaknesses.” prioritizing our adam ii can lead to much more self-development which leads to an overall better life. today, especially in the us, our society has put a large focus on adam i. almost everything we do is measured, and our society essentially functions on competition. this has lead to the adam i mindset often taking control of our lives and leaving us with “successful” lives, but not a very good way of living. i believe that it is important to remember that there are much more important things in life, and the small stuff, that tends to feel really significant at the time, doesn’t actually matter in the long run.(“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). in week 4 we also discussed healthy relationships. i believe that this is one of the most important things in life. the people we surround ourselves with have such a large impact on not only our happiness but also who we are as individuals. forming genuine connections with people who will support, but also challenge you is one of the best ways you can grow. people bring some of the most genuine happiness into our lives. therefore, i think that maintaining meaningful connections is one of the best measures of self-worth. however, it is important to make sure you don’t allow yourself to fall into an unhealthy relationship. it is definitely important to form meaningful connections, but it is also important to keep your independence and individuality as well. it is good to care about the people in your life, but not to the point where it becomes unhealthy for both people involved. the “that’s not love” video points out the importance of recoginizing an unhealthy relationship because it can be easy to see some of the toxic behaviors in relationships as “acts out of love” when they are really not. while i do think that forming meaningful relationships is important, it is also just as important to keep your own beliefs and individuality intact through the process. (“because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation moreau fye week 4). in our discussion last week, we also talked about implicit bias and the importance of trying to get the whole story before making any stereotypes about people. in the “danger of a single story” ted talk, adichie talks about how we are often given only one side of a story that is usually skewed from the truth. she https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be talks about her roommate who had made certain assumptions about her before she had even met her based on where she was from. she relates this to her own experience with making assumptions about a family in her community because of their socioeconomic status. our brains are programmed to categorize information and make generalizations. this often leads to implicit bias, which is a bias that we don’t intend to but can easily form if we aren’t careful about learning more before making assumptions (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). because you never really know anyone’s full story, it is important to act kindly towards everyone around you. there is no way of actually knowing the full story behind why people are the way they are, so it is important not to judge someone when you have no idea what their life is like. in week 6, we all wrote poems about where we are from. each poem was so different and abstract, which just goes to show how different everyone’s experiences really are. the whole goal of the “where i’m from poem” initiative was to make this point that everyone has a unique backstory, so we shouldn’t judge people when we can never really understand the circumstances of their life. our society as a whole is very judgemental of things that are different from us, but i believe that it is vital for us to remember that we never really know the whole story behind a person. that is why i believe that a good measure for self-worth is also how you treat the people around you (“where i’m from poem” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). overall, the relationships with the people around you is far more important than any achievement or success in life. week 8-moreau integration one professor thigpen moreau 15 october 2021 uncovering purpose and truth in life i believe that i am searching for purpose and for a way to be of service to the world. college is a time for me to develop skills and explore my interests in order to fulfill this purpose, but i also recognize that college is not just a waiting period. there are so many opportunities on campus for me to make an impact in the community and on the world without waiting for the “right” time or to be “finished” developing my skills and gaining knowledge. i have already learned at notre dame that life is a continuous exploration of knowledge and i am meant to cultivate my mind and heart both in college and beyond--it’s not a one-time process. in week 2, we listened to a tedtalk by commentator david brooks, who expressed that many people live for themselves and seek to gain as much as possible from the world, but this mindset ultimately undermines their search for purpose and fulfillment. according to brooks, “in order to fulfill yourself, you have to forget yourself. in order to find yourself, you have to lose yourself” (“should you live for your resume...or your eulogy?” by david brooks fye week 2). brooks’ perspective reminded me of one of the units covered in my theology class a few weeks ago; as i was reading about the argument that theology is more important than science or vice versa, i was struck by one author’s argument that theology and science must really work together because not everything can be explained empirically and not everything can be immediately solved spiritually, therefore they complement each other. for example, the author contrasts “knowledge sub specie aeternitatis” with “news from across the seas.” while knowledge sub kurzweil 2 specie aeternitatis refers to knowledge which can be deduced scientifically through measurement or observation, news from across the seas is not deduced except by revelation. relating this to brooks’ comment, i believe that i am searching for my purpose through others; only through the revelation (news from across the seas) of love and relationship can i find my purpose and truly connect with others. in this way, i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by fostering a sense of welcome and belonging for everyone around me so as to promote diversity, friendship, and healthy relationships. in the words of writer olivia t. taylor, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor fye week 4). i seek to act with love and compassion towards others while staying true to my authentic self in order to build the mutual friendships described by taylor during week 4 of moreau. this means embracing both similarities and differences with others, recognizing that our similarities to each other help boost each other’s confidence and foster a feeling of comfort and belonging, and our differences help us to positively challenge each other and see situations from new perspectives. therefore, it is healthy, and it’s even important and necessary, to have friends who are both similar and different from me. one of my first introductions to notre dame was one of welcome, one in which i could see that the notre dame community is a place of life-giving relationships. after touring campus with a friend who attended the school at the time, my friend brought me to her dorm mass. during the sign of peace, i was blown away by everyone giving each other hugs and wishing each other, including me, well. even though no one knew me, they treated me just the same as they did the other students in the dorm. i can confidently say, in response to taylor, that i left that mass with a smile on my face because of kurzweil 3 the welcome i was shown, and now i am at notre dame as a student myself to forge that same life-giving relationship with others. similarly, i noted earlier that i believe that i am searching for my purpose. i also believe that, at this time, my purpose is to be a leader, a peacemaker, a compassionate companion, and an active person involved in the betterment of this world. yet this search for purpose and belonging is continuous. as stated by brene brown in a tedtalk during week 1 of moreau, “they had connection as a result of authenticity…they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown fye week 1). in this way, brown asserts that finding purpose and fostering connections with others along the way often requires people to be less focused on what they want and who they want to be; instead, taking a step back and opening oneself to possibility is a more beneficial track for searching for purpose. brown’s quote really resonated with me because it points to the valuable skill of taking time for oneself and doing a self-assessment. additionally, brown notes that love requires risk and vulnerability. along these same lines, i would add that it requires sacrifice. in my university seminar class, i am learning about how affection is expressed in various south asian and pacific cultures. the american idea of love often does not translate to other cultures, which have their own versions of affection. one notable example is the emotion of fago in ifaluk culture. fago can roughly be considered a combination of love, compassion, and pity that motivates those on the island of ifaluk to show affection towards one another through sacrifice and service. for example, a brother might show affection towards his sick sibling by leaving his family and his work for a short time to bring his sick sibling to the hospital facility on the main island. this demonstrates that, just as fago is expressed through acts of sacrifice and love, so also must i search for my purpose by acting with love, service, and compassion towards others. kurzweil 4 furthermore, i believe that i grow by fostering relationships with friends, family, and everyone whom i interact with on a daily basis by sticking with them both in easy times and hard times. it is always difficult to receive constructive criticism from others, but these people whom i have deep relationships with help me to grow by not only building my confidence in my accomplishments and potential, but also by pointing out areas where i can improve. i sought to convey my love for these incredible people who help me to grow through my week 6 “where i’m from” poem. i have been writing poetry since middle school as a way to relax, untangle my inner emotions, address social concerns and call people to action, and offer thanks to those who have shaped me to be the person i am today. the following excerpt is from a poem i wrote titled “unexpected friendship”: “words passed a handful of silence my way and placed—with a knowing smile— deceivingly diminutive grains of quietude one by one, upon my outstretched palm. they were full of reds and blues and purples ever changing, ever shimmering with new inspiration, and suddenly i could hear it…” my parents, my friends, and my teachers have all been instrumental in developing my love for writing poetry, just as they are instrumental in my growth as a person and in my growth in my relationships with others. they are beacons of kindness and love, capable of criticizing my work to help me learn from my mistakes and also capable of extraordinary compassion. during week 6 when we had the opportunity to write a “where i’m from” poem, my mind was immediately drawn to these beloved people as i wrote, “this place is the inspiration for my poetry: it gives light to my aspirations, to the hopes and dreams and challenges in my writing. i’ve been sharing them with the world for some time now, encouraged by my teachers— kurzweil 5 my dearest mentors— and my friends, the ones whom i will finally see again in rochester when we meet, though separated for so long after our paths diverged.” therefore, not only does my poetry demonstrate my growth, but it also reflects all those people and places who guide me along my path. i believe that i grow through their example and their loving relationship. i believe that i pursue truth by acting as a servant leader, remaining true to my authentic self, and helping others without expecting anything in return. in my week 5 readings and videos, father grove brings up the point that we consider the notre dame community a “family” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by father kevin grove fye week 5). this family is composed of love, unity, faith, truth, and so many more values. however, i am not at notre dame just to gain knowledge and a second family from this community--i am also at notre dame to give back to it. it is through being a servant leader at notre dame (and using these experiences of humble service to be a servant of the greater global community) that i believe i come to know myself better, come to know god, and fulfill my life’s purpose. furthermore, as sorin wrote to father moreau, notre dame was established to be a powerful institution for good in the country. this, then, is the mission of each notre dame student. we receive our education, we enter the notre dame family, not for our own personal benefit alone, but to go out into the world and be forces for good through each of our unique lives. therefore, i believe that i pursue truth by transforming my notre dame education into a tool for me to be a force for good. finally, i believe that my community should avoid the danger of a single story. during week 7 of moreau, i learned that, according to authors payne, neimi, and doris, “many of us are more biased than we realize” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by payne, neimi, and doris fye week 7). this doesn’t mean that we are bad people, and i also realize that i need to avoid kurzweil 6 the danger of a single story as well. according to adichie, “the single story creates stereotypes, and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie fye week 7). to combat this single story as we might combat relying solely on theology or solely on science, it is necessary to recognize the importance of the “shared story” (“how to destroy truth” by david brooks fye week 7), in which humans recognize that we are all products of our interactions with each other and our overlapping experiences. for example, i am studying middle eastern history and arabic, and prior to beginning my courses in these subjects here at nd, i was subject to the single story that most people in the middle east are muslim, they dress a certain way, etc. these single stories could not be further from the truth. my perspective has been vastly expanded in just a short period of time, and my arabic teacher is extremely helpful to my classmates and me so that we can learn about arab culture from several angles. for example, when my arabic teacher saw a poster for arabic tutoring at the csc that featured the announcement and a picture of a mosque, she immediately showed us the same tedtalk about the danger of a single story that i watched in moreau and impressed upon my classmates and me that there is much more to the arabic language than studying islam. therefore, not only do i believe that my community (myself included) should avoid the danger of the single story, but i also believe that it is important to learn from the perspectives of people like by arabic teacher who can help the community to better cherish diversity and rich culture without the imposition of a single story. moreau first year experience integration 2 megan mcintyre 11/23/21 oh how i’ve grown what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? this semester has truly allowed me to delve into questions i did not even know i could ask about myself. for example, i questioned how i choose my friendships. the commencement address allowed me to contemplate the people i choose to surround myself with. often, i realize, i choose people because they are similar to me in some way, making them easier to initially connect with. “we are like actors following the script for creating factions: develop strong convictions. group up with like-minded people. shun the others. play the victim. blame the enemy. stoke grievance. never compromise.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” moreau fye week 10). this quote stood out to me while reading the commencement address. i fully agree with the idea that we, as a general population of humans, struggle to surround ourselves with those who differ from us. while i had never really considered what drew me to my friends back home, here at notre dame i have found myself questioning this. i now make an effort to befriend those who differ from me. for example, i have befriended a girl in my biology class who is from brazil. she taught me all about a lot of the foods she eats at home, as well as her family’s traditions and activities on the holidays. we take lunch breaks after class together, and i find it so refreshing and enlightening to learn from someone the whole time i speak to them. this friendship we have cultivated is especially valuable to me because my new friend offers a completely new perspective, widening my horizons to the rest of the world rather than enclosing me in the bubble of likeness. another question i have asked is “how can i learn more about unfamiliar concepts?” this has helped me to learn about the cultures i was not previously exposed to. when we just know a bit more about other people and their ways of life, our relationships can flourish even more. because i have started asking these questions, i have become exposed to an entirely new culture, and i expect to be exposed to many more. in that way, i have begun to reject the quote from the commencement address: i have stopped surrounding myself with like-minded people, but begun trying to learn from those who differ from me. this helps to prevent the factioning that naturally occurs here at notre dame and in society as a whole, allowing us all to be brought closer together. what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? being vulnerable in order to connect with others is something that has increased in importance for me since the beginning of my notre dame journey. while i previously valued my relationships, coming to a completely new location, exposed to so many unfamiliar things, i realized how important having support and comfort from others is. one thing that limited the depth of my relationships is being closed-off due to insecurities. for a community to manifest, we must first have “a capacity for connectedness—a capacity to resist the forces of disconnection with which our culture and our psyches are riddled.” ("with voices true snapshot summary" klau center archive moreau fye week 11) keeping this idea in mind, i have found that the relationships i began building just a few months ago have flourished to become even greater than some of the relationships i spent years building in my hometown. for example, i found myself sharing deeper aspects of myself with friends i have made here than i have ever shared with some friends i have back home. i shared about my relationship with my mother and the pressure i am under from a lot of my family. i didn’t realize that many of them would relate to mebuilding our friendship as we went through the same struggles. i realized here that expressing vulnerability is what allows us to build the strongest relationships, as we can truly connect only when the whole truth is shared. what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? i used to feel the need to attend social events at every opportunity. however, my desire has become more nuanced in college. in high school, attending every event was something i felt i simply had to dothat it was a requirement if i wanted to maintain friendships or have any fun in high school. however, since coming here to notre dame, i have realized that it is not necessary to “go out” all the time, or to go to every party and social gathering i have been invited to. i have learned that i have the ability to say no when i want to, without a better reason than “i don’t want to.” “you can’t live your life according to the expectations of others. when you do, you aren’t living your own life — you’re living someone else’s life. (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). the week 9 assignment helped me to realize i can take my time and put myself first to find the people who truly care about me. the road to having friendships seemed black and white before: rush to meet new people, then go do fun things with them, and try to meet more people to accumulate new friends. while i still enjoy being social and attending fun events, i no longer feel the crippling need to attend every one of them, regardless of whether i am in the mood or not. i have realized that those around me will understand when i don't want to gowhether it’s because i have a lot of work, i’m tired, the event is not my thing, or i simply don't feel like going. building relationships is much more nuanced than going through the motions. what was once ambiguous or vague that now holds greater clarity? something that was once unclear to me was the importance of seeking support from others, especially in times of distress. coming into notre dame, i had mostly dealt with the stress, pressure, and high expectations that weighed me down all by myself. at the time, i didn’t think that others could relate to me. i believed that they would find me unnecessarily stressed about success, or would belittle my problems. however, being separated from my family and thrust into a brand new environment, i realized how necessary support from others truly is, because i needed it more than ever. the in-class exercise in which we drew graphs of our feelings/state during the past few months helped me to conclude what i had already begun to realize: there are a lot more people who can relate to you than you might think. while the timing of my classmates’ and my low points differed slightly, i realized that i was not alone in my sadness, my states of anxiety and stress. my classmates shared similar reasons for their highs and lows, and we spoke about what we did to combat these low points. from surface-level conversations, it is difficult if not impossible to realize how people are truly feeling. however, what now holds greater clarity is the support that we can provide each other as we struggle through tough times together. for example, when i was feeling really lost here when it came to making new friends, i turned to my high school friends, who were feeling the same way. even though they were hundreds of miles away, their support and just having someone to vent to helped me through it. talking to them allowed me to realize that i truly wasn’t the only one who felt a bit out of place, and that it was okay to still be figuring everything out. c.s. lewis writes that, “it is during such trough periods that [humans grow] into the sort of creature he wants it to be.” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12) these troughs mentioned represent low points in our lives. c.s. lewis describes human life as “undulating”rising and falling like waves. having high points and low points in life is simply unavoidablean intrinsic characteristic of human life. what matters is not how high we rise, or how long we stay in a trough, but how we react to low points, how we pull ourselves out. comment by michael comuniello: @mmcinty3@nd.edu -thank you so much for submitting a rough draft of your integration assignment! overall, it's well-organized and well-written! as noted by my previous comments, the only area for growth i'll note here is more thoroughly integrating your own experiences from the semester into your reflection; you do this very well, and some minor edits should bring your integration over the top! if after reading my comments you have questions, please let me know. blue skies, mike expected grade: 282/300 _assigned to megan mcintyre_ comment by megan mcintyre: thanks so much for looking this over for me!! i hope you had an amazing thanksgiving break. wishing you the best:)) thank you for an awesome semester. professor retartha integration three mission statement during my time at notre dame thus far i have realized that staying true to yourself is the only true way you will be successful in life. it is important to remember at times you are all you have. my belief in myself has grown immensely especially this semester and notre dame has helped me discover my true self. the notre dame education has helped me to think in ways i never thought i would. it challenged me while also rewarding me in the best way possible. one of the more unusual exercises we did in this class truly showed how the education really pushes you to think outside the usual comfort zone. the exercise of writing my eulogy, while at first was off putting to me, helped me to reflect on how or what i wanted to be remembered for. i believe god has put every person i’ve met at school so far in my life for a reason. i hope that i can make a positive impact on everyone i meet. this school is so special and the people that this education attracts is so unique and i am so lucky to be a part of it. after much reflection, i have realized this year success for me is measured by my happiness. it is easy to find all the negatives when you are adapting to a new environment; however, i found that the moments when i was happy were the moments, i felt most successful. although there have been many ups and downs throughout my time here it has helped me realize just how important certain things and people are in my life. the quote that resonated with me the most was, “we don’t appreciate what we have until it’s gone” cheesy but very true. since i’ve been at school being away from my family has helped me reflect on the importance they have in my life. i lean on my family for everything and being away from them has just emphasized how important they are to me. i realized how much i relied on them so when i would have an issue, i found myself calling them and asking for their advice. however, as i became more comfortable with my own abilities, i found myself taking issues into my own hands. when i have felt suffering this year, i have tried taking it into my own hands and i have reflected on things i can do better and grown from it. i have grown a tremendous amount in wisdom since being at school. the most amazing thing about being at college is the different people you will meet. everyone has so much to share and so much wisdom to give and elaborate on. i have learned so much from my peers and for them i am forever grateful. you learn the most from people you admire the most and i truly admire my classmates and their incredible motivation. courage for me this year has been depicted through my willingness to step out of my comfort zone; academically and socially. i have learned how to be outgoing and how to express my feelings in a successful way. i have always been outgoing but college forced me to be comfortable with uncomfortable situations. i grew up in a small town where i knew everyone in the supermarket and local deli shops. i went to a small elementary school which transitioned to my middle school as well. i always knew the people i was surrounded by and at times felt like i knew their entire family too! for these experiences i feel incredibly blessed; however, i first felt out of my comfort zone once i got to high school. new classmates, people i had never gone to school with, and a much bigger grade. however, it was only a matter of time before i became incredibly comfortable with the people not only in my grade but also the grades above and below me. so, once i got to college, i thought it would be just as smooth however i quickly realized that i was now going to be going to school with thousands of people. at first it was challenging but i continued to adapt and have loved every person i have met. i am so blessed to have the opportunity to go to one of the best universities in the world, but i am more blessed for the people i have met along the way, and i know that group will only continue to expand the older i get. this mission statement shows a great amount of promise for my future years at this university. the mission statement shows my growth throughout my first year. although there were bumps in the road it has only made me stronger and has taught me that not everything is going to go as planned but what matters is how you react to the different directions you will get thrown in. this mission statement makes it seem like i have accomplished and overcome every hurdle, but i am aware that i have not even come close to everything i will endure throughout my four years. although there will be the dark days the most amazing thing about this school is that there are so many different avenues where you can go and ask for help or just reflect. i find myself going to the grotto when i feel overwhelmed. sometimes the best thing to do is to just reflect on the good things you have in life rather than the things that are giving you angst. friends are another great outlet that i utilize that i use when am going through something because i am aware that i can not go through everything alone, someone could’ve experienced the exact thing that you are going through and can make the healing process much easier. i am so grateful for all the opportunities and resources this school provides for me and i am certain i will continue to utilize all that the university of notre dame has to offer. lmachion integration 1 taylor kelly moreau fye: integration 1 15 october 2021 everything is how it is meant to be root belief #1: i believe that great things come out of challenges. i believe that great things come out of challenges. as we discussed in week 6 from the “where i’m from” poems (“where i’m from”-week 6 moreau fye), the experiences we have had and where we are from make us who we are. i would not be the person i am today had i not faced some of the challenges that i have faced. to be completely honest, these are miniscule challenges to those faced by others. however, i have learned some of the best skills from pulling myself together and getting the job done. for example, when i took ap us history, i had a substitute teacher who had no previous teaching experience for most of the year because the original teacher had health issues. no one in the class felt prepared, so over spring break i studied for hours each day to memorize a year’s worth of material. this method worked, and i received the score i wanted on the exam. i do not talk about this experience often, but i think back to it when i feel like school is too hard or i do not feel like studying. this experience showed me that even though the learning situation was challenging, i can persevere, and, in the end, i have greater confidence in my abilities and know that i can do something well if i put my mind to it, which has been extremely helpful going through the rest of high school and starting college. however, this belief has also been challenged as i have started college. i have a truly great group of friends at home, and the colleges they attend are about an hour away from their homes, which seems very nearby considering my ten-hour road trip. at times i have wished i went to school closer to home, but then i remind myself that in these next four years, i will meet so many great people and have exciting experiences. in week 5, we read about fr. sorin’s journey to found notre dame. fr. sorin writes, “i cannot but admire the sentiments with which it pleased god to animate our little band, who had more than one hundred miles to travel through the snow,” (“letter to blessed basil moreau” by fr. sorin-week 5 moreau fye). although my challenges are very small, especially compared to those of fr. sorin, i relate to him in that his challenges led to great things. i know that i must be pushed from my comfort zone to achieve my potential. root belief #2: i believe that faith is a lifelong journey. i believe that faith is a life-long journey. i am a very curious person, as proven by the character strengths quiz, as it was my number one result (character strengths quizweek 2 moreau fye). i want to know when everything will happen, how everything will work out, and reassurance that everything will be okay. in his article, david fagerburg writes, “faith is a transformed mind, a mind being filled with the light of god. god discloses himself, faith responds, and then we can see with new eyes.” (“faith brings to light a dark world” by professor david fagerburg-week 3 moreau fye). this belief has originated from me being restless when constantly juggling my curiosity and questions instead of finding peace in god. this belief is challenged when i lose sight of my mission, and get bogged down by meaningless tasks. as i grow as a college student taking the moreau course, i am reminded in my belief that faith is something to be developed over life. root belief #3: i believe that everyone deserves to be listened to. i believe that everyone deserves to be listened to. after completing the activity of sharing our where i’m from poems in class (“where i’m from”week 6 moreau fye), i saw more clearly that everyone has a web of connections and a unique pasts that everyone was brings to the university of notre dame community, and, more specifically, our moreau fye class. i have developed this belief after witnessing too many times when other people’s thoughts aren’t being considered because they are not popular. when i happen to be in one of these situations, i try to give my full attention to whomever is talking. at the same time, this belief has been challenged when i am in a rush to get somewhere and someone is trying to tell me their opinion. in that situation i need to remind myself to have patience. also, listening to everyone who wants to speak is the best way to remedy implicit biases. in her ted talk, chimamanda ngozi adichie says (referring to her american college roommate), “her default position towards me, as and african, was a kind of patronizing, well-meaning pity,” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie-week 7 moreau fye). not only is it impolite to not allow everyone to be heard, it is dangerous for our own personal development. root belief #4: throughout my life, true friendship is of utmost importance. i believe that, throughout my life, true friendship is of utmost importance. true friendship also unlocks the barrier of vulnerability between two or more friends. dr. brene brown speaks of this when she says, “vulnerability is not weakness. and that myth is profoundly dangerous… vulnerability is the birthplace of connection and the path to the feeling of worthiness. if it doesn’t feel vulnerable, the sharing is probably not constructive.” (“the power of vulnerability” by dr. brene brownmoreau fye week 1). this belief comes from the fact that i am a very social person, and i feel most like myself when i am around other people who support me. i feel most like myself when i can be vulnerable around my true friends, and that is what true friendship is all about. similarly, true friendship is not transactional. in the “i love you, double whiskey” video, the actors and actresses portray situations in which love is both transactional and abusive. “because i love you, we can hang out with your friends tonight,” (“i love you, double whiskey-week 4 moreau fye) is not a statement of true love and friendship. i know this belief of mine has been challenged when i struggle to find ways to show my friends that i appreciate them. one of my friends from home will occasionally help me prepare for a math test. i often feel the need to find an opportunity to express my gratitude by picking up starbucks for her or something similar, but i need to remind myself that true friendship is not transactional and it is okay to rely on my friends as long as i am there for them to rely on me. integration one the root beliefs of according to qqcs i believe that my worth comes from my own view of self and nobody else’s view of me. in her ted talk, dr. brown explains where shame comes from and how it isn’t just something that doesn’t happen. everyone feels shame and everyone is going to have feelings of doubt or unbelieving in themselves. the key to overcoming shame is not to push it aside, but to embrace it. the most effective way of embracing shame is being vulnerable. i know that personally, i have an issue with being vulnerable. i don’t let many people see me cry because i don’t want to seem like i don’t have it all together. but in reality, no one has it all together and if we are all vulnerable with each other, we will all see that shame isn’t something to be embarrassed about. and even if people judge me for my vulnerability that shouldn’t matter. my worth comes from me and only me. i shouldn’t be afraid to be vulnerable because others’ opinions don’t matter when it comes to my self-worth. dr. brown’s ted talk helped me to see that i don’t need to keep my vulnerability to myself, but i need to embrace it and show others what i’m truly all about. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) i believe that my personality is dynamic and there is no single way my personality should be. in david brooks’ ted talk, he talks about the two different extremes of personality traits. there are resume virtues and eulogy virtues. your resume virtues are personality traits that you want people to see now and attribute to you in your current situation of life. your eulogy virtues are personality traits that you want to be remembered for. while both are important, resume virtues show themselves in day-to-day life while eulogy virtues are always overarchingly present in your personality and how you present yourself. it can be important to take a step back and actually look at the difference between your resume virtues and eulogy virtues. while there is no one right way for these virtues to be, it is important that they are similar to each other and, of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be course, positive. although the way others view you doesn’t entirely matter it’s not important if the people around you think you’re cool or smart or funny etc. it is important for our moral characters for people to consider us nice or friendly etc. these traits are not just traits seen by others, but traits that will help you to live a good life that leads you closer to heaven. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two) i believe that love is an action and not a feeling. my favorite definition of love that i’ve ever heard comes from what i learned in my high school theology class, “love is dying to oneself for the sake of another” i absolutely love this definition. when i hear people talk about love around me these days, i feel like they aren’t truly grasping the concept of what love is. i know that it can be hypocritical for me to say because i do have a boyfriend and i do say that i love him, but i don’t like the way some people consider themselves to be “in love” when they aren’t really putting in the effort to sacrifice themselves for the person they love. love isn’t just about feeling butterflies when you’re with someone. it’s feeling the need to do whatever it takes and whatever you can to make that person happy. both fagerberg and fr. pete talk about spirituality in their articles and i think spirituality plays a strong role in loving others. fagerberg uses the analogy of a window to describe spirituality. when you let the window become a mirror, you fall into selfishness and lose sight of those around you. when you love someone, you can’t let the love become a mirror. you can’t use their love for you to your own advantage and not give them back the same sacrifice. you have to keep that window as a window and pay attention to what’s around you especially the person you love. (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three) i believe that is important to grow in both knowledge and faith. that is my absolute favorite thing about the university of notre dame. in kevin grove’s speech, he talks about the https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau separation of faith and reason that led to the takeover of notre dame in france. the people of france didn’t like faith and favored reason. when i was a little kid and visited notre dame with my family, the thing that stuck with me the most was students’ answers to “why notre dame?” almost always the answer was “the community” i love the community of notre dame and what makes that community so amazing is the way notre dame teaches us to grow not only with an amazing education but the best education in faith that we can receive. that is why i wanted to go to a catholic school and that is why i love notre dame. (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove moreau fye week five) i believe that it is important to consider other peoples’ points of view before making an assumption. i really like chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk about the danger of a single story. the message of this video is just so incredibly important. adichie doesn’t just talk about people being biased towards her being from africa and assuming she’s poor, she also talks about the way she assumed that people who worked in her home lived terrible lives. it is in our nature to assume. we assume things every single day. but just because you assume something, does not mean you should believe it. after hearing the stories from adichie about bias and its effect on the people you direct it towards, i believe that you need to know someone’s story before you judge them. although bias is something that is always going to be present. it’s important to not give into bias and actually think about someone’s situation. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau first year experience section #78 prof. pruitt november 29, 2021 kositzke believe in your belonging. college is a time in which change is inevitable. no matter your circumstances, when you enter college as a freshman, you enter an environment of unfamiliarity. and so, it is nearly impossible to instantly feel at home with this sudden change. the truth is that you belongthere’s a place for you on campus. what bridges the gap between feelings of isolation and the truth that there is a place for you is the belief that belonging exists. once we embrace it, once we live a life that embodies a sense of belonging, we can grow. entering college, everyone has some sort of image of what to expect. whether that image is met or not, almost all students place a large emphasis on these expectations as a measure for their success in college. but, these expectations are almost always flawed. they are drawn from images of others, ideals built up in the minds of students in anticipation for this period of their lives. whether it be movies, relatives, or some other connection, almost everyone has some sort of expectation when it comes to college. this is dangerous. expectations can be useful in intentional goal setting or some leadership, but employing direct expectations in everyday life constantly introduces a significant element of stress. and so enlies the first main lesson i took away from moreau. “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to be perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). so, how can we help people feel comfortable about pushing out these expectations? simply enough, awareness. learning stories that are similar to your own allow some sense of ease in tense individuals. elizabeth cox outlines it in the same lesson as the previous point: “with increasing awareness of how common these experiences are, perhaps we can feel freer to be frank about our feelings and build confidence in some simple truths: you have talent, you are capable, and you belong”(“what is imposter syndrome” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week 9). imposter syndrome is natural. people shouldn’t be embarrassed or disturbed by it. share your story with others and belonging will come naturally. related to sharing your story with those around you, a strong community can be crucial in achieving a sense of belonging. throughout my life, i’ve placed significant value on those around me, particularly during times of stress or troubles. from classmates to family members to even instructors, i’ve learned that those around me care deeply for me and when we embrace each other, we build each other up. i feel as though when i go out of my way to force some of these connections, it feels ingenuine and never quite the same as a true relationship. essentially, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community”) by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). people who focus too much on achieving some outcome for the community alienate one another and connections diminish. we must take a breath and recognize people around us. we’ve established the importance of eliminating expectations and genuinely embracing the community around us. but, it’s not that simple. our interactions are tainted by things like implicit bias, and the divisions which spur from that. we must raise awareness that implicit bias is real, and we must make efforts to eliminate it so everyone feels welcome. diversity is a powerful tool. it shouldn’t be controversial in any way. ‘why does it matter?’, some may ask. to that, i say that a variety of lifestyles, experiences, and perspectives is the key to driving ourselves forward. as palmer said, we cultivate connectedness by “penetrating the illusion of separateness and touching the reality of interdependence.” if individuals continue to look out solely for themselves, nothing good will come. there’s value in the connections which we make with others. notre dame is helping to fuel connections all across the nation, and i recognize this immense opportunity and attempt to seize it everyday and bond with everyone i see. our university president even said: “a country whose citizens treat each other with scorn does not have a bright future”(“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father john jenkins moreau fye week 10) the last core value which i truly feel the moreau curriculum cultivated within myself and added value to my college experience is that of vulnerability. it was the first lesson i had in college as a whole, an exciting start for week one. but it stuck with me, reappearing in other lessons and popping in my head even when not mentioned. the whole notion that we cannot bury the past and we instead must embrace mistakes to grow is something i hold near to my heart. i hate when i make mistakes, but i always make sure to reflect on those i make so that i am able to keep growing beyond where i was when they happened. just as the practice of kintsugi described in week 10 explains, being broken doesn’t mean you can’t have any beauty in the future. “he cannot ‘tempt’ to virtue as we do to vice. he wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles” (the screwtape letters) by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12. this source talks about the power of faith and how a god would find beauty in the stumbles of humans. even a letter written by the devil himself acknowledges the power that can be found in our faults, the growth that can materialize from mistakes. father moreau’s five principles encompass all that i’ve talked about in this paper when considering what it means to belong. our mind is at the core, rationalizing the world around us and keeping us grounded. heart, quite possibly my favorite virtue of all time, is key to connections with others and fostering meaningful relationships. zeal is the passion and drive to push through obstacles and remains strong. family is a network which we can always feel safe around and fall back on in times of need. and hope allows us to see the light even when there is only darkness in sight. these principles combine in a truly spectacular manner and, when embraced, contribute to an environment of togetherness. sharing these words in particular brings the family of notre dame together, it allows a commonality for us to all share. the meaning of ‘to belong’ bounces all over the place, not unlike the subjects of this paper. but that’s the key! belonging can manifest in any number of aspects which surround us, all we need to do is believe in them. believe in the potential that others have, believe in the possibility that things will work out. of course, it helps not to overvalue expectations, collaborate with others (sharing your story with others to diminish imposter syndrome), seek out diverse connections for deeper value, acknowledge mistakes and vulnerabilities, and embrace stumbles of our lives. if we keep an open mind and embrace just some of father moreau’s teachings, belonging will be a byproductit’s just a matter of time. walking the walk: living my own beliefs 2 walking the walk: living my own beliefs entering a new environment is not easy for anyone. in such a transformative time in our lives, it is important to take time to reflect on beliefs occasionally, so that we can go forth and live the most authentic lives that we can. these beliefs, however, are subject to change throughout my time at college. i expect that, much like my decision of what to major in, my life goals will be impacted by the people that surround me and the experiences that i have. i believe that i am searching for fulfillment in what i study and how i choose to spend my time. upon filling out my applications for college, i knew that i had to choose a major to apply to that was consistent with my resume and activities from high school. therefore, due to my mainly business-oriented activities from high school, i knew i would be applying to mendoza. without a true path in my mind of what i wanted to do for a living, besides “be financially stable and help others”, i applied as a finance major. however, learning about the various career options in the finance sector was very tempting to pull me from my “helping others” course. it is evident now to me that “we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or for your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i know that i will not be fulfilled if i live a life in which the only person that i work to help is myself. therefore, i know that i must continue to strive for a path that fulfills my internal values and not simply the external revenue. i believe that i grow by accepting my failures and learning how to adapt for my future ventures. like many of my peers, i performed very well in high school. my version of studying would be maybe a couple of hours the night before if i really didn’t understand the material, but usually it took the form of simply completing all the homeworks and looking at a study guide the morning of. this is not how college works, apparently! i knew i had to step my game up, so i studied for my first finance exam for multiple hours a night for 4 days leading up to the test and 6 hours the day of (as it was a night exam). all this for a 41%! this was a punch in the gut for https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&feature=emb_imp_woyt me, as i can never remember a time in which i have scored that low on an exam that is worth so much of my grade. however, i decided that i should not let this failure affect my overall gpa, so i admitted to my error in studying and dropped the class. at first, i felt very bad about the whole situation, however as carla harris said, “fear has no place in your success equation” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i cannot be afraid of failure. i failed a test. and i have learned from it! i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by allowing others to understand my background and the ways in which i show affection. most of my relationships are formed and maintained through some sort of humor. it is very difficult for me to have more “serious” relationships with people in which we only interact in formal settings. however, i know that sometimes this way of forming relationships can sometimes block deeper connections. unfortunately, a lot of the time this block is formed by my fear of not being able to stack up, personality-wise, against many of the people around me. as brené brown said, “i ran into this unnamed thing that absolutely unraveled connection...shame is really easily understood as the fear of disconnection (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). luckily, i have been able to break this barrier with a handful of friends both from my own dorm and from others. this number is limited, however. in high school, i was involved in certain relationships with others that felt emotionally draining. it is important to share your experiences and problems with others. it is important, though, to make sure that if you are sharing your emotional burden with someone, you are a listener as well. healthy relationships do not mean dependency. as we heard from the one love foundation: “because i love you, you listen as i cry. you hug me and say that it’s okay. and you take all the blame. because i love you” (“because i love you, double whiskey” by one love foundation moreau fye week four). this is a perfect example of a toxic relationship that takes an emotional toll on you. so far in my experience at notre dame, i have been able to let others in, up to a level that i am comfortable https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g with. they understand who i am and where i am coming from, but they do not know, necessarily, the harder details. i believe that as a part of a larger community, i should do everything that i can to ensure that my peers feel safe and welcomed. in a place like notre dame, while there are many amazing, beautiful aspects of this campus, there is also an acute lack of diversity. this was one of my main concerns with choosing notre dame over some of my other options, as i knew i wanted to make sure to diversify the people who are in my life. in my hometown, while i do live in a moderately progressive area, there is very little diversity, as the split between caucasian and asian make up the majority (around 60% to 40%, respectively). the way in which we are brought up affects the way in which we operate in our day-to-day lives. “one reason people on both the right and the left are skeptical of implicit bias might be pretty simple: it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice” (“how to think about ‘implicit bias’” by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week seven). no one wants to be the one to admit that they have biases, but if i make a conscious effort to change those biases, i know that i will be aiding in making our campus a better place for all. lastly, i believe that i pursue my own truth by taking what i learn at notre dame and being able to apply it to my own life outlook, as well as passing it down. i was raised in a very catholic household and went to catholic school for 10 years before coming to notre dame. however, i am not a religious person. nonetheless, i can take the religious lessons that notre dame and still get useful messages out of them. homilies can still teach very powerful lessons, even if one is not faith-oriented. for example, in week 4 we read: “ there is such a thing as a healthy ego, but we’re talking here about egocentricity, an unhealthy sort of self-love that flatters us with the idea that everything in the world revolves around us” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). although the overall lesson was about using our faith in god to bring us out of darkness, i am still able to take valuable lessons from it. i can comprehend this as using my faith in goodness or my faith in humanity to help myself be a https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau better person. i know that these lessons that i am learning about myself and others through notre dame should not end with my own person. i want to be able to pass what i learn here, as well as what i will learn in the future, down to my family. in our “where i’m from” poems that we wrote in week 6, i chose to write about the different family traditions that have been practiced throughout my childhood. i referenced the beach, snow skiing, and camping (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six), as i hope to one day be able to pass down those traditions to my children as well. i feel that i have already gained so much insight into the way that i function as an independent person in these first two months of college. i understand that as i continue to grow and change through my next three years, i will be faced with new challenges and hardships. however, with the help of my steadfast beliefs, i know that i can overcome any obstacle that comes my way. https://docs.google.com/document/d/19nnv7drw1qe4krj9olgd2tynqlc5i3_spqhz2fohljy/edit?usp=sharing integration 2 arcidiacono 1 redefining myself one of the most defining questions i have asked myself this semester is who i am here at notre dame. back in high school, i always saw myself as the smart quirky kid, but now i completely surrounded by really smart quirky kids. i had set this expectation for myself that i would stand out by being really smart, but now that doesn’t work anymore. having realized that, i started to put into question some of the other expectations that i have for myself. i asked myself if i really wanted to be an aerospace engineer or if thats just what i told my friends because it sounds impressive. ultimately, i ended up throwing out most of my expectations about who i should be. this is pretty much exactly the point julia hogan makes in her article about expectations. she says: “the point is, these expectations are all arbitrary and not definitive rules for the only way to live life” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan, fye week 9). in other words, expectations are more limiting than freeing, and we don’t need them to become who we really want to be. another occurrence that has shaped me over this past has been the humbling experience of coming to a new place with no one i know. i was very confident and comfortable during my senior of high school because i finally felt like i had mastered high school. i felt as though i had the world wrapped around my finger. however, when i showed up at notre dame i realized that i was completely alone. i didn’t know a single other freshman and i realized just how hopeless life is without a friend group to support you. i saw that the reason i was able to navigate high school successfully was that i had an amazing network of friends who inspired and supported me. this sudden humility goes hand in hand with one of parker palmer’s points in his article on community: “when i flourish, it is easy to maintain the illusion of separateness, easy to imagine that i alone am responsible for my good fortune.” (“thirteen ways of looking at comunity” by parker palmer, fye week 11). when i read this, i looked back on my high school days and realized just how arrogant i was. i thought i was responsible for my success, but coming here to college helped me realize just how much i depend on my amazing friends. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ arcidiacono 2 another thing i learned from this initial loneliness is just how much can be learned from periods of weakness. we oftentimes only see the bad when things are going poorly, but there is so much gold hidden beneath that layer of pain. it is really hard to find the good in the bad, but it is there. in addition to seeing how i should be more humble from coming here with no friends, i also learned a lot from the spring registration nightmare. i got a late time for registration for my spring classes and almost every class i wanted to take was full. i was even worried that i wouldn’t be able to get into the classes i needed to graduate on time. i spent a lot of time stressing out about the whole thing and exchanging emails with my advisor. i kept telling myself that god was watching over me and everything would work out but i got really stressed nonetheless. in the end, i got a schedule that had all the classes i needed as well as a few that just looked plain interesting. i should have listened to the voice telling me to trust in god but i just didn’t believe it for some reason. once my worrying proved to be for nothing, i realized that i really need to put more faith in god. i learned something and grew closer to god despite going through a really stressful circumstance. “the screwtape letters” also deals with this idea of learning from the bad times in chapter 8: “in his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies more on the troughs even more than the peaks” (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis, fye week 12). while i didn’t realize it at the time, god was using that event to help me grow closer to him and trust him more, just like what screwtape was warning about. even from the tough times here at notre dame god has helped me grow. one last thing that has really had an impact on me since i have arrived here is encountering people with who i disagree. i of course disagreed with people before coming here, but i have never encountered so many different ideas in one place. before, i could mostly rely on either avoiding people i disagree with, but some of my best friends here have very different political ideas from me and i really want those friendships to continue. how can a friendship like that even work? luckily, i have learned to understand where my friends are coming from and respect their opinions although they differ from mine. i still don’t agree with them about https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 arcidiacono 3 everything, but i have been able to find the merit in their ideas rather than just the flaws. without seeing the good in my friends and their ideas i would not be able to maintain that friendship. this is similar to the point father jenkins made in his 2012 commencement address: “a country whose citizens treat one another with scorn does not have a bright future” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr john jenkins, fye week 10). just as a country cannot stand if its citizens treat each other with scorn, neither can a friendship if the friends treat each other with scorn. i have seen firsthand that befriending people with who you disagree is actually very easy if you treat them with respect and get to know them. there is so much to gain from having friends who disagree with you because you learn how to understand them despite your differences. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ moreau fye 2 an unexpected expectation college has been everything that i didn’t expect it to be. i envisioned college to be full of anxiety and discomfort— fulfilling and enjoyable, but stressful. however, what i didn’t foresee was the mindset i would quickly develop. coming to this school, i’ve quickly felt full and like i belong almost naturally. the difficult adjustments i thought i would have to make physically and mentally occurred almost seamlessly. i feel more independent and confident, and better suited to my environment. as i reflect on my time so far, i believe that the university of notre dame is the place i was meant to be at. moving on in my journey, i understand i will encounter challenges both good and bad, but i have faith in myself to be prepared to advance and take risks as i continue working to find myself. in high school, i defined myself heavily by the expectations i held for myself. similar to a quote by julia hogan, “expectations are the bars we set for ourselves. when we meet (or surpass) them, we feel like we are worthy. if we don’t meet those expectations, we feel like the exact opposite — that we aren’t good enough” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). despite the hard work i put in, i found myself reflecting my value on productivity and test scores. if i scored highly, i would credit myself the bare minimum and consider it getting by; when i did poorly i was convinced there was no success for me in the world. however, one semester into college has helped me to overcome this unhealthy belief. being at notre dame, i realize that no matter how hard i work, nothing will go as smoothly as i anticipate. for that reason, i have not defined myself by numbers and scores, instead i made sure to leave gaps in my schedule to do things that make me feel good about myself such as working out, taking walks, having a meal i enjoy, meeting with friends and attending mass. i even found myself more productive when i didn’t force myself to study long hours. through this, i’ve found that it is important to not overwhelm myself with expectations. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau some things need to come more naturally and although it requires more patience, fulfillment will come more happily and healthily. another pressure i put on myself was to perfect every aspect of my life. college life has really been something to challenge this belief. being thrown into a world of independence, there are a lot of pressures that i didn’t quite realize i would face. at home i was fortunate to have everything set out for me by my mom— i didn’t have to worry about even a meal because it would always be ready on the table for me. yet, i remember thinking that it would be easier at school, when i had a shorter class schedule and full control of my time. however, not everything went quite so smoothly and i soon found myself having much less time and much more stress than i anticipated. as said by fr. jenkins, “the many demands of life were pushing you in other directions, and you pushed back. even if the spirit called you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week 10). being at school there has been countless pressures to face. class may last only a couple of hours a day, but alongside this came quick-paced academics, social and internal pressures. some days i would forget a meal as i was preoccupied with other things. there was definitely no easy way to be here, yet i firmly believe there is no better place for me. i recognize that nothing in life is intended to come easy and without planning, but it also doesn’t need to come in such a perfect way. so far, these challenges have been necessary to shape my mentality for the better, and i find myself fulfilled with my progress. however, these challenges haven’t been ones to face alone. prior to enrolling at notre dame, i spoke to several people affiliated with the school through family, friends or other alums, and one of the most mentioned qualities about the school was the community. since coming here, i feel i have already seen some extent of this praised community, and it has become something i also so quickly find myself appreciating. throughout the semester, i’ve been very https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ good about keeping in touch with my family. my sister is a junior at another university, and loves to tease me about being at the library on a daily basis. however, i started to ask myself, why am i always there? i’m not always getting so much work done, but instead i found myself always very happy to have quick, passing conversations with classmates and friends. i had yet to fully appreciate all the wonderful people i already feel so connected with at this school. not only this, but i have participated in many fun events such as the first snowball fight or ryan thanksgiving and fj’s cookie nights. these are all things that my sister tells me she wishes her university had, but it’s simply lacking the same community. for that reason, i firmly agree with palmer on his quote, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). not every school has such a wonderful community. yet, it is not something to be forced or expected, instead it needs to be tended to and built. notre dame has helped me to upraise honest, natural connections with people that i feel is lacking in a lot of today’s world. these connections are all blessings to me that i could not have made anywhere else. the variety of amazing people i’ve come across is so special and something i will be so appreciative of moving forward in life. one final lesson i’ve learned is the importance of patience. through life, i will encounter a variety of experiences and there will always be a wrong and right way to respond, but sometimes it will be a little more vague. as said by the devil, “we can drag our patients along by continual tempting, because we design them only for the table, and the more their will is interfered with the better… [god] wants them to learn to walk and must therefore take away his hand; and if only the will to walk is really there he is pleased even with their stumbles” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). almost every predicament will have an easy answer, however, sometimes it isn’t always easy to pick. human nature wants to be impatient and pick what is best for themselves, but it is the devil that is trying to tempt us and make us dependent and reliant. on the other hand, god gives us his hand and wants to teach http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186053?module_item_id=102829 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/186053?module_item_id=102829 us to walk by his side. i feel that this semester has strengthened my faith and helped me to find more purpose within myself. temptations are short-lived and empty; i need to focus on long term goals and happiness to find the ultimate fulfillment— even if it means less immediate benefits. i accept the fact that i am a work-in-progress and that i will make mistakes and sometimes fall short. however, i am patient to become the best version of myself and fulfill what god intended of me. today, in the last couple weeks of my first semester of freshman year, i look back with a different mentality. i understand that i am meant to face challenges and temptations, and that they won’t always be easy, but that i was intended to have made it this far. i feel i’ve made progress on my journey to self-fulfillment, through more realistic expectations and greater responsibility, and undoubtedly the relationships i’ve developed. i am proud of myself so far, but also carry a lot of gratitude for the environment that has allowed me to do so. i am thankful for notre dame, and will continue to make the most of the time i have here as i continue to walk with faith, patience and pride. week 8integration one professor pruitt moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 i beleaf: a personal analysis of my core values and growth i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable, and my most authentic self. i believe that i am responsible for finding the balance in my own life. i believe that a strong faith framework is essential, because it influences every aspect of life. i believe that maintaining life giving relationships can be challenging, but it is equally as important as forming them. i believe that the power we have to influence others’ stories, while on our own journeys, is tremendous. i believe that where i’m from does not dictate where i potentially can go, but it does play a pivotal role in who i am. i believe that my purpose is to live an authentic and joy filled life. as i think back to my first week here it’s hard to picture a version of myself who did not spend her late nights in the hes, and virtually all my free time with friends who at the time were simply faces in pdub. the last eight weeks have fundamentally changed me. during quarenteeen i grew to know myself better than i thought was possible, and it feels like in just eight weeks i have come to know myself just as much if not better than before. perhaps it is being seventeen hours away from home, or having to share a space with someone for the first time, but everyday i come to know myself better and better while at notre dame. my capacity for understanding, patience, and independence have all exponentially grown. in just a few weeks i have deepened my self-knowledge and become a better person, both of which i attribute to my environment and the notre dame community. my root beliefs are essential in examining the person i am today, and the person i’m becoming. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by being vulnerable, and my most authentic self. brené brown’s video reminded me that our society demands vulnerability in order to foster authentic relationships. i found comfort in the fact that both her and i struggle with vulnerability, it makes me feel like it is not a personal flaw. as i have been at notre dame i have been forced to be vulnerable. there is vulnerability in meeting new people, making friends, and even living with a stranger. dr.brown reminded me that to be my most authentic self, to live a joyous life when things are going great and when i need some help, i must be intentionally practicing gratitude and joy (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). even in moments of uncertainty, or when i’m feeling the least incontrol, i have to be open to being seen, heard, and loved. i believe that i am responsible for finding the balance in my own life. as i have transitioned from texas to indiana and from high school to college, finding balance in life has been essential for my sanity. i have come to realize that finding balance is more than just having a really well organized to do list, and limiting my caffeine intake. to find balance you must first examine yourself. while doing the character strength survey i was not surprised to find that my lesser strengths included hope, forgiveness, and love. my type a personality tends to be kinda cynical, slow to forgive myself/but holds grudges, and more comfortable pouring out love than https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be being vulnerable enough to receive it. i’ve begun treating these like spiritual disciplines, and actively work to combat them in my everyday life. i’ve also come to realize that to live a balanced life i have to be comfortable with the parts of myself i have labeled as shortcomings. i also must allow myself to not only concentrate on this part of me or i will never truly live. the second part of finding balance is changing how you approach life. often i become stressed because i am overthinking. as i have transitioned to college there has just been more to think about, already the question of what classes i need to take next semester, and who will i room with haunt me. in brooks' ted talk the quote “nothing that is worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime; therefore we must be saved by hope,” immediately caught my attention (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooksmoreau fye week two) . a balanced life acknowledges this. the video describes how adam 1 is built by building on your strengths, while adam 2 is built by fighting your weaknesses. we, i especially, often live in an adam 1 society that fears not appearing perfect, thus encouraging constantly focusing on improving your strengths, neglecting, and even hiding your weaknesses from others. to live a balanced life you must be aware of both adam 1 and 2, and acknowledge them both as part of your authentic self. i believe that a strong faith framework is essential, because it influences every aspect of life. faith allows me to be hopeful, and maintain a trust in god, even when everything is falling apart, which happens a lot in today’s society. while i’ve been away from home and at college i’ve had many instances where i thought everything was falling apart. being in an unfamiliar place, and having a rigorous schedule has been a test to my faith in many ways. the knot metaphor put things into simple terms, and when compared to a faith journey made the journey seem less overwhelming. patience, accepting that every faith journey is unique, and having hope https://www.youtube.com/channel/ucauuunt6odekwe6v1ngqxug https://www.youtube.com/channel/ucauuunt6odekwe6v1ngqxug are all essential in faith formation (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete mccormickmoreau fye week three). not only have i been far from home, but surrounded by people who are not part of the same denomination as me. despite all being christian’s i have struggled to find a community of people to fellowship with who are church of christ, or anything similar, and understand the challenge of practicing your faith isolated from your community. without a strong faith framework i would feel alone. despite being surrounded by people of the catholic faith i have continued to practice, and because of this my faith has grown. i believe that maintaining life giving relationships can be challenging, but it is equally as important as forming them. the “because i love you” video showed how love can not only be positive in relationships, but also can have a negative side (“because i love you, double whiskey” by the one love foundationmoreau fye week four). to be in a life giving relationship you must be committed to constantly pursuing one, no matter how new or old the relationship is. you must not only love but respect the other person in a life giving relationship. this means emotional manipulation cannot be part of the equation for a life giving relationship, no matter the nature of the relationship. to be in a life giving relationship you must be committed to constantly pursuing one, no matter how new or old. while on campus i have encountered many different types of relationships. my dorm (yay pdub) has been an environment which has fostered relationships that are not only life giving, but life long as well. i believe that the power we have to influence others’ stories, while on our own journeys, is tremendous. the quote “life, sweetness, and hope” those are the words of an ancient prayer to mary, to notre dame. they're also holy cross’s goal for your time here, that you might become in god's eyes the glorious person you are, and settle for nothing less,” directly addresses the story of everyone who attends notre dame ( “two notre dames: your holy cross https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 education” by father kevin grovemoreau fye week five). because we are here not only are we influenced by the university's values, but the other students and faculty we come into contact with. over the next four years these people will shape and be a part of my story. i can already tell i am better because of the people i’m surrounded by and the influence of notre dame. in our everyday life, and especially over the next four years while on campus, it is important we do not develop a single story view. single stories have tremendous influence and can even define entire groups of people. it is important to continue the pursuit of truth despite being in a world surrounded by false single story narratives ( “danger of a single story” tedtalk by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week seven). the idea of a single story narrative is nothing new to me, it often comes up a lot in my own personal life. in the tedtalk chimamanda ngozi adichie talks about not having representation in literature, which is something i am all too familiar with. while at notre dame it is important that i do not let others push a single story narrative on me, and find representation on campus. one day perhaps i will be the representation for another, as an african american woman in law. i believe that where i’m from does not dictate where i potentially can go, but it does play a pivotal role in who i am. there is true value in where we are all from. though some people’s origin stories may be sad, or even horrific, it is where we are from that shapes us to some extent. our experiences contribute to the formation of our identity, even if we do not realize it in the moment. while preparing for my own poem i drew inspiration from george ella’s poem ("where i'm from" by george ella lyonmoreau fye week six). as i’ve begun to examine who i want to become i have looked back on my origins, and this assignment really reminded me. being in a new place, with new people, and what feels like an entirely different life i used this assignment to ground me and remind me of my roots. where i am from does not necessarily https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html have to dictate where i will go in the future, but my experiences and beliefs will guide me as i enter this new stage of life. i really enjoyed this assignment because it allowed me to share more about myself to someone who only knows the current version of myself. where i come from, what i have learned, the things i love, and dislike, and my experiences all contribute to me being here at notre dame. the past prepared me for the present, and i will spend the next four years working towards the future. i believe that my purpose is to live an authentic and joy filled life. with the values of notre dame as my guide, a dedication to service, and a strong commitment to my faith i am confident that purpose will be fulfilled. moreau integration two my journey growing up, i was always more decisive than my peers. when asked what ice cream flavor i wanted or what my plans were for the day, i always had a clear answer, with no hesitation. however, i have had a change in mindset recently. during this new phase of my life and throughout my college experience so far, i have realized i do not have all the answers and not everything is as clear as i previously thought. more importantly, i have asked questions that deepen my understanding of myself and my journey here at notre dame. from the article, “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, the author highlights, “trust yourself...look at all of the options out there for living life and pick the ones that you feel called to”(“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan-moreau fye week 9). through evaluating all the opportunities presented to me, one of the most important questions i have asked myself is “what do i want?” in terms of the friendships i form, the goals i set, and the aspirations i would like to fulfill, i have learned to always ask myself this question and trust my natural instict. instead of listening to unrealistic external expectations and standards, i have learned to respond by listening to myself. this has instilled a newfound sense of confidence within me as i have learned that in trusting myself, i can answer questions that often seem daunting. another pivotal question i have asked this semester is, “how can you create a healthy balance between academic and social life?” during my time in high school, i put an excessive emphasis on academics, taking the hardest classes and maintaining a perfect transcript. while i do not regret putting long hours into studying and achieving the best of my ability, i was always tired and had a hard time maintaining that healthy balance. in answering this question, i have now realized how finding a middle ground between my past and present self has increased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey. one of my favorite videos i have watched this semester, the kintsugi video, relates to the concept of unifying your past and present experiences. the creator of kintsugi describes how love serves as a bridge between your past and present self and how there is “beauty in brokenness”(video: “women find healing through kintsugi workshop,” grotto-moreau fye week 10). the message behind kintsugi was to transform hardship and tribulation into growth as an individual, which i truly admired. in addition to encountering my innermost self, i have also encountered community. through various dorm events and activities, i am able to meet people from all walks of life, perspectives, and backgrounds that share a similar passion for what notre dame has to offer. in relation, the author of “thirteen ways of looking at a community” says, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer-moreau fye week 11).this resonated with me because my response is now a newfound appreciation and sense of cherishment for others around me. my response has also turned into a willingness to participate. for instance, my hall hosted a thanksgiving dinner and i signed up to cook three dishes: stuffing, apple pie, and mac and cheese. after hours of work, my efforts were rewarded by seeing the happiness and gratitude people expressed when tasting my food. it is what you do for others that truly counts, which now holds greater clarity in my purpose behind every day. another aspect of my life that holds greater clarity is realizing how important family is to me. prior to college, i never recognized the extent to which i love spending time with my parents, and close family members. whether it was watching the nightly news with my mom or playing tennis with my dad, i did not fully appreciate the joyful little things in each moment. i now know how precious time is and how significant it is to not take anything for granted. i have also encountered hope. moving to a new environment and experiencing changes including living with a roommate, adjusting to colder temperatures, and being away from family has not been entirely easy. however, maintaining hope throughout the whole process has enabled me to grow as an individual and challenge myself in ways i never thought possible. likewise, the reason behind containing hope is “to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation.” as hope is essential to one’s understanding, it is key to moving forward. an example from one of the readings, the screwtape letters, examines how humans respond through “undulation, the repeated return to a level from which they repeatedly fall back, a series of troughs and peaks”(the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis-moreau fye week 12). encountering hope from my friends and family has encouraged me to persevere through the series of troughs and peaks the screwtape letters refer to. while i have encountered hope, i have also faced disappointment. setting high expectations for myself, and not reaching them, can contribute to a feeling of discouragement. instilling optimism within myself and finding a silver lining in those setbacks has encouraged me to always work hard no matter the outcome or circumstance. for instance, when i received one of my statistics tests back, i was upset with the outcome and put that energy into studying for the next exam. as a result, i did much better and was content with the outcome. last but not least, i have encountered experiences and memories that will continue to stay with me throughout my time here. from attending my first football game to sitting in a big lecture hall, every moment has helped shape me and given me varying perspectives. talking to classmates in the moreau class has enabled me to connect with others and form bonds with people i would have not otherwise met. i was able to understand various points of view and hear each other's story. it has allowed me to fully grasp the spirit of camaraderie and togetherness surrounding notre dame. moreau integration two maria finan moreau integration two 3 december 2021 fighting the good fight notre dame is an inherently unique place in comparison to other universities around the world. this is by no means bad, but rather, i believe that its unique characteristics in terms of faith, community, and rigor have been a net positive in my encounters this first semester. however, a place so drastically different than my small, non-sectarian high school took an adjustment period, and i am blessed to say that i am beyond the struggle that comes with assimilation. during my process of searching for a school that would grow and serve me best, the world seemed to be in more pain than it has ever been in my lifetime. i’ve learned a lot about myself and the world around me throughout my first semester at notre dame, and at the very least i am very blessed for that. my grandfather would best be considered a notre dame “subway alum”. the son of an irish immigrant in a time period where irish-americans were not necessarily celebrated like they are today, my grandfather found solace and a community through the small stereo that connected his brooklyn tenement house to notre dame stadium. ever since then, notre dame has been an integral part of his lifeblood. he was unable to afford a notre dame education, and thus it became a real dream of mine to complete his. i could write for hours about what my presence here means to me and my family, but i’ve actually taken on extra waves of anxiety that i didn’t expect. my family does not hold unfair standards on me, but i put a lot of pressure on myself to find real academic success at such an academically rigorous school, because it has always mattered to me to make my grandfather proud. a question that i’ve found helpful in bringing myself back down to earth amidst rushes of anxiety would be “instead of letting your life be ruled by the expectations of others or your own expectation that you have to perfect, what if you just did your best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week 9). being at notre dame can feel unreal at points, and hanging onto balance within my life and my family’s lives is very crucial for my mental, emotional, and physical health. i thought college would be a pretty consistent academic grind, which it can be, but i’ve quickly found the importance of managing my time and expectations in a manner that prioritizes my wellbeing. as previously mentioned in my first integration, i came to notre dame to find purpose, and i believe that i am still on such a search. since that time, however, i’ve come to the conclusion that it is crucial for me to pursue a professional career that works for the betterment of others. notre dame’s tagline of being a force for good in the world was a strong pull in my choice to attend the university. it’s important that i do not neglect such a foundational truth. fr. john jenkins summarizes this point stating “of all the graduates entering the wider world this spring, you here today, more than others, have the responsibility, and the training, and the commitment to address the most urgent, most strategic challenge in the country today — the challenge of reducing hatred and promoting love.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins moreau fye week 10). i hear about often people taking jobs out of my respective area of study whose goal is simply to build capital for people and institutions who certainly do not need it, and do not do societally productive or moral things with the capital that they create. that lifestyle does not attract me, and i think that it was an important distinction for me to realize that. we live in a world that seems to be ripping apart at a https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ socioeconomic and educational level. i’ve realized that i want to work in a manner that aids these issues, and i am now excited to work towards fulfilling that passion. though obvious, i spent a lot of time in solitude this past year thanks to the global pandemic. like many, i learned the value of my community during my time in quarantine and the need to uplift my community. the emotional pits in my time in quarantine opened up the idea that “when i fall, i see a secret hidden in plain sight: i need other people for comfort, encouragement, and support, and for criticism, challenge, and collaboration” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week 11). my community, specifically the greater st. louis area, has been ravaged by the socioeconomic and educational divides that i mentioned earlier. i see a real connection between my goals in life and the needs of my community. i’m not here to say that i’m experiencing an epiphany of sorts, but it can always be a place to start. i’m really against the notion of the “savior complex”, but a summer internship or expansive volunteer opportunity that helps my community would be a perfect fit for me to figure out what exactly i want to do, and to try and build bridges that have been destroyed for decades. just because i’ve found the issues in our society that i want to pursue change in, doesn’t mean that my goals will be accomplished. income inequality has existed in american society since the nation’s inception, and the educational divide has only grown in contemporary times. however, to lose hope that the world can change is only enabling the issues that are pervading our society. society is built upon change, “as spirits [humans] belong to the eternal world, but as animals they inhabit time. this means that while their spirit can be directed to an eternal object, their bodies, passions, and imaginations are in continual change, for to be in time means to change” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). hope in change http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28298/files/186733?module_item_id=103506 certainly should not be the sole reason to attack injustice, but it is certainly crucial to hold onto it as the fight will last longer than my lifetime, and will constantly see new obstacles. notre dame has taught me that the fight for good is worth it, despite its challenges. i’m blessed that i am able to be here to realize that dream. integration 2 12/03/2021 integration 2: reflecting on the semester the second half of my first semester at notre dame has tested my abilities as a student, friend, and daughter. after spending four months at college, i finally feel like i have found my close friends and have adjusted to the living and studying environment. however, as the semester has moved along, school has become increasingly more difficult making it harder for me to find time for myself. another big change in the second half of the semester is the increase in club responsibilities which has been challenging to manage on top of academic work. in addition to school and clubs, there are also gamedays and social events to factor into my schedule. amid all these obligations and activities, i have realized the importance of time management and prioritization as a college student. this is also a common theme we discuss in moreau, as i know my peers face similar challenges balancing school, social life, and personal time. through our weekly meeting in moreau, i have gotten the chance to think about how i am challenged by the pressures of college, and how i can respond in the healthiest way. one of the main difficulties i’ve encountered in my social life at college is the pressure to have everyone like me. as freshmen, we meet so many new people in such a short amount of time during the first few months of college. essentially, everyone has a fresh start and wants to make the most of it by making good impressions on the people they meet. however, sometimes the pressure to be perfect results in us feeling like we need to change things about ourselves to make other people like us. we discussed this inner conflict frequently faced by college students in week 9 of moreau. from the reading that week, i chose to focus on the quote, “they’re the ultimatums we give ourselves in order to be liked and accepted by others. if we meet these expectations, we tell ourselves, others will accept us.” (why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit, julia hogan, week 9). as someone who often feels pressure to make everyone like me, i enjoyed reading the author’s claim about how we often hold ourselves to higher standards than the people around us. given the state of our world today, it is also important to consider how racism operates at notre dame and how we can advocate against it. as a person of color myself, this is a huge part of my experience at notre dame as we are a predominantly white institution. although i personally haven't experienced any negative responses to my racial background, i want to ensure that other students of color also have positive experiences on campus. we addressed this topic during week 10 of moreau by discussing whether catholic schools teaching critical race theory will help their students be better anti-racist allies. from the article that week, i focused on the quote, “they argued these exercises reveal a kind of essentialism that reduces everything to one’s racial background. (should catholic schools teach critical race theory?, christopher j. devron”, week 10). i agreed with this quote because so many of the one-sided stories about colonization that are narrated in history classes subconsciously pass along negative stereotypes about people of color. these stereotypes have the power to infiltrate the way students see people of color and the way they treat them. a challenge that i have encountered more frequently than i thought is the gender ratio in academic settings. i am majoring in economics and applied math which are two fields notorious for being male-dominated. in my number theory class, finance club, and quant club, i am one of two women among many men. all my instructors and mentors for these classes are also men. due to the fact that i can’t find female role models in my field of interest, i have found that it is important to be my own leader and take pride and ownership in my work. this is a topic we https://www.americamagazine.org/voices/christopher-j-devron-sj https://www.americamagazine.org/voices/christopher-j-devron-sj covered in week 12 of moreau. from the article we read that week, i chose to focus on the quote, “leadership for community consists in creating, holding, and guarding a trustworthy space in which human resourcefulness may be evoked.” (thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer, week 12). this quote stands out to me because it contradicts the assumption that we operate in a world of scarcity and untrustworthiness. some of the examples given for this reason include people don’t want to work, they are lost without routine, and they will cheat if given the chance. therefore, the author argues that communities/ organizations naturally come up with rules to address these assumptions. as one of the only women in my classes and clubs, i have to assume that people in my community have the best intentions to help me while still being confident and a leader in my own right. when i came to notre dame, i expected to find community in my residence hall because that is what i heard from all the current students and alumni. when i found that i didn’t naturally click with many people from my hall and didn’t want to participate in community events, i was disappointed. after reading the article from moreau week 11 and doing some reflection, i realize that community is more than just convenience. from that article, i chose to focus on the quote, “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as “a capacity for connectedness” (thirteen ways of looking at community, parker j. palmer, week 11). i actually have to make myself open to connecting with people if i want to find community in my hall. worst case scenario, i can make these efforts elsewhere and find community in clubs, classes, or other activities. as this semester comes to an end, i have to admit that i have learned a lot about myself and how i deal with challenges. i am proud of how i have learned to manage my time to devote equal energy to school, friends, and family. furthermore, i am happy that i have found a community at notre dame that has supported me through all of this. work cited devron, christopher j., et al. “should catholic schools teach critical race theory?” america magazine, 20 aug. 2021, https://www.americamagazine.org/faith/2021/06/03/critical-race-theory-catholic-high-schools-bl ack-lives-matter-240792. julia hogan, lcpc. “why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit.” grotto network, 29 jan. 2020, https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_sou rce=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau. “thirteen ways of looking at community • center for courage & renewal.” center for courage & renewal, 25 feb. 2017, http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ week 13 integration the college experience: faith, hope, and community from my time at notre dame, i have learned that self-doubt poses the greatest challenge to personal, social and academic success. self-doubt can happen in moments of failure and in moments of success; while our moments of self-doubt can bring feelings of unworthiness and incompetence, they can also bring moments of self discovery. in the moments where i feel the highest level of stress, i feel more likely to doubt myself. for example, i had the unfortunate pleasure of taking two exams within the same week; the days leading up to both exams i felt that i was incapable of doing well on either of them. even worse, i felt that i simply did not belong at notre dame; i think it is easy to forget that everyone has moments of self-doubt and has feelings of unworthiness. a ted talk calls this phenomenon “pluralistic ignorance” and describes it as a common feeling “where we each doubt ourselves privately” (“what is imposter syndrome and how can you combat it?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week ix). overcoming self-doubt poses the greatest mental challenge, but it is a challenge that we do not have to face alone. in the week where i felt the great feelings of self-doubt, i sought the support of my peers; i learned that i am far from alone in possessing these feelings, and that it is normal to possess them. i think that when we feel alone or isolated in our experiences it allows self-doubt to further permeate and diminish our confidence. while overcoming self-doubt depends on our mental dexterity, it does not have to be a challenge entirely faced alone. i know i may never rid all feelings of self-doubt, but it does not mean i am any less capable of achieving my goals; in the future, i hope that i can continue to foster self-confidence, and help others within the notre dame community feel worthy through their failures and successes. while notre dame largely possesses a welcoming community, there have been moments where it exhibits hostile and unfriendly behavior, specifically towards the saint mary’s community. witnessing the online harassment of the saint mary’s community highlighted problems of disconnectedness. the notre dame community is by no means a perfect one, however it is inexcusable to regress into a state of disconnectedness and animosity. in order to grow internally as a community, we must possess a respectful, and accepting attitude towards external communities. i think that in hostile situations (especially in the case of saint mary’s harassment) the fracturing and brokenness of a community can be witnessed. every community possesses their own moments of brokenness. it is after these moments of brokenness are exposed that matters; the response to brokenness ultimately determines the future of community. to combat brokenness, means to combat the hatred within ourselves; in the words of father john jenkins, hatred is “ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by father john jenkins moreau fye week x). becoming mute to the hidden hatred within ourselves stifles the opportunity to grow in devotion, to grow in respect, to grow in love. every day there is a common struggle within all of us to resist the malice in our own hearts; fighting with love in hopes to produce an everlasting community. we must be connected with ourselves before we can fully connect with others; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ community is not something “to be achieved, but a gift to be received” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week xi). we must individually evaluate ourselves, rather than evaluate other people; if we want to receive a community filled with compassion and empathy, we must be willing to effectively change our hearts. i think some of the notre dame community members, especially those who participated in the harassment towards the saint mary’s community, forget how important the saint mary’s community is to notre dame. from this experience, i learned that sometimes the best way to help a community is by evaluating how we can improve ourselves, before we try to improve others; i also think that in order to fight animosity, we need to act with kindness and selflessness. to become an overall better community, we must be willing to resist our internal hatred, and harness love to foster progress. in the future, i hope that me as well as other notre dame, and tri-community members will have the courage and will to resist the hatred within all of us, and respect one another. as i progress towards completing my first semester at notre dame, i have relied on hope and faith to guide me through both stressful and calm times. in instances where i become frustrated with my academic life, i try to take time to self-evaluate the position i find myself in. sometimes i get so carried away with striving to achieve academic success that i forget the real importance of receiving an education, especially a notre dame education. during the semester, i found that writing a specific essay for one of my classes was especially frustrating; i put so much pressure on myself to write well that i became consumed with achieving perfection. in these moments where i heavily chase academic success instead of academic growth, i fail myself. education is meant to in part learn, however the other part is to ignite passion. as campus ministry describes it, the purpose of education is ultimately to “enkindle within students a burning desire to act boldly” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week xii). part of the notre dame education is hope, and faith; an education is meant to help us progress society, but how can we expect to progress society if we do not have faith in ourselves or hope for the future? when we look beyond the present and into the future, we define a goal to achieve, and within these goals we subconsciously hope that the effort we put in can achieve them. hope and faith ultimately spark passion, and inadvertently bring the most rewarding success. when i focus on the good i can do for people with an education, my perspective on education changes; i want to receive an education not only to personally succeed, but to help others succeed. i think by continuing to maintain hope and faith within my education i can become truly fulfilled in life. just as hope and faith guide me today, i hope that they can guide me tomorrow and the days beyond. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://downloads/holy%20cross%20and%20christian%20education%20(1).pdf building my horizons final lim1 jaehyun lim mr. oswald moreau 01 december 2021 building my horizons (to encounter) as nearly 2 4 months have now come and gone since the start of my college experience, i feel unbelievably older, more exhausted, and yet also a lot more mature (yes i realize this is copy-pasted from my last integration, not because i’m lazy but because i truly feel this way even more than i had then). now that i have gotten over experiencing my first high of near complete freedom, i now realize the struggles and sacrifices it takes to excel here at notre dame. my root beliefs from the first integration haven’t changed and are still important to me, i just now realize how much work i need to put in to make it all happen. ever since i’ve arrived here, i always thought i would achieve a 4.0 gpa. egotistical, maybe, but now that i look back it was just more me being naive/ignorant. after returning from fall break, my mindset wasn’t right for studying and i didn’t show up to class prepared or do my work in advance. it was frustrating because of the internal dissonance i had, in which one side of my brain told me to start working or else i wouldn’t get a high gpa while the other said that i can still get a high gpa while still having more fun and watching more youtube. my journey here wasn’t what i expected it to be, and after receiving a lower than expected grade on my calc exam, i had to come to the realization that i could no longer get a 4.0. it sucked, and it was through the week 9 material in which i realized how i needed to work to improve myself for the lim2 sake of improvement rather than some prior expectation. as stated by julia hogan, “not only are these expectations arbitrary, but they will almost always backfire on you” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). what was previously black and white with my mindset to just “work harder” was not realistic, and i needed to find a way to motivate myself beyond just an expectation. i now know that showing resilience through imperfection is when i can actually manage to learn something when achieving or even failing to reach expectations, because at least i can continue to become better. in the future, i don’t want to come in with a mindset of just attaining a certain number grade but rather just work as hard as i can. hopefully i can show that with this upcoming finals. something that really hit me hard was when mary frances myler wrote out an editorial piece on irish rover condemning lgbtq acceptance at notre dame. i won’t get into the politics/religious talk regarding this and don’t know enough to even comment on it, but this was the first public display of hate i saw in my time at notre dame. before i got here all i could hear was about how white nd was and how extremely religious they were to the point of alienating anyone else, yet in my experience everyone was completely kind, accepting, and welcoming to others. but here it was, in front of me, a central divide in my community that no one wanted to bridge. my hallmates at baumer all condemned her, but that sort of retaliation does nothing to fix the challenge that notre dame faces. father jenkins highlighted this a while back when he said “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten). it’s easy to hate, and it’s even easier to blame, to hate the hater, and call the problem fixed even though nothing is solved. ms. myler’s essay was, at its core, to hate, and the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ lim3 group chat messages in baumer calling her words were, at its core, to hate. this vicious cycle motivated behind an aim to hurt others is a problem that all communities face, not just at notre dame, and can only be fixed through love. i’ve realized how pointless hate is, and i hope to not only use this realization to improve myself but also all others. for the most part, people need love the most when they deserve it the least. as an asian student who only represents 4% of the student population, i have to know how to strengthen bonds of interconnection with others even through our dissimilarities. i never cared much about football prior to coming here, and now one of my friends is on the team and i actually search up notre dame football and read articles like i’m studying for class, maybe a bit too much. it is through these little things that i can find a way to relate to someone through a similar passion that we have, and then expound on our differences and learn from each other. i found this to be a much better way to build connections and friendships than the cookie-cutter “name, country, and hall” we often used at the start of the school year. the intention was good, but it was never organic, and that was the main problem with it. “too many relationships have been diminished or destroyed by a drive toward ‘community-building’ which evokes a grasping that is the opposite of what we need to do: relax into our created condition and receive the gift we have been given” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). by going outside my comfort zone and coming here meeting complete strangers and people with completely different backgrounds, i’ve learned how to socialize better, which people to socialize with, and how to build friendships that last. one of the biggest questions i had this semester was how to approach hope. for one, it helped lull me to a false sense of security regarding my grades when i should have been studying http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ lim4 from the get-go, while it also is the main reason why i look forward to being here at notre dame and in continuing my faith. my theology professor highlighted something interesting to me that i also noticed in the week 12 content: the entirety of christianity is held together by the hope that the cross was god’s intention, and christ’s gift to us. “the conviction that the son of god died willingly, even for the sake of those who persecuted and abandoned him, in order to bring us through darkness to glory” (“hope holy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). from moreau to even non-believers of christ, he illustrates that hope is the link between education and belief in which people find a purpose to their life. i think of hope as a way i can continue to move forward when any other viewpoint renders me lost. i hope to use it not to delude myself, but as a crutch to help me continue what i know is right. it is through that hope in which i continue to work to aspire for my hopes to become a reality. https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ spring moreau integration midterm prof. bushman moreau integration #3 25 february, 2022 a force for good in the world i remember as a man of positivity. whatever the situation was, he always attempted to extract the positive aspects of a circumstance. i believe that his pursuit of positivity is what made him such a great dad and person to be around. my dad, will be remembered for his positivity, mentorship, and righteousness. many of us often lead busy lives and carry great amounts of responsibility. kyle was no different from this precedent, as he was always very busy and held great amounts of responsibility. despite his many duties, he always seemed to be jovial. whenever i asked him how he stays so optimistic, he would remind me that “stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye spring week one). he explained to me that there are so many things to stress over in our world, and often it can become overwhelming. going day by day, hour by hour, is the best way to make sure you are not too overwhelmed in life. i found that approaching life in a step by step manner really helped me, but i found it to be quite difficult. he encouraged me to keep trying, as he also struggled at the beginning. kyle explained that when he first started to live step by step, he reminded himself each day “improving myself slowly and steadily should be my mission each day” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye spring week five). after years of practice, living step by step helped me to feel less stressed and happier. i think we can all learn from kyle’s method of minimizing stress in his life. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q4nnjvvykxuwshj-kdpvzzeoy0mlrvpmshgcuuhwrls/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q4nnjvvykxuwshj-kdpvzzeoy0mlrvpmshgcuuhwrls/edit?usp=sharing growing up, i was very uncertain about my future. i remember my senior year of highschool, when i just had to idea where i wanted to attend college. the uncertainty was constantly bringing down. kyle offered me some advice, explaining that “when hardship or unexpected things happen, we often focus on the things that we don’t have” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye spring week six). my dad reminded me that it is very easy to get caught up in our own self pity in life. we will deal with hardships throughout our lives, and we will not always have everything that we desire. however, there is so much that each of us possess in life that we should treasure. instead of always thinking about your desires, take some time to appreciate what you have and those around you. my dad’s words really helped me to gain some perspective during this time of hardship. just a few short months later, i had finally made my college decision. despite my happiness that my great college search dilemma was behind me, i had a new dilemma. i had no idea what to major in. once again, i felt so unsure about my future and was not sure what to do. once again, kyle gave me more advice. kyle reminded me that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye spring week four). as a highschooler, my understanding of the world was pretty unrealistic. kyle made me understand that my choice of major is not what i will be stuck doing for the rest of my life necessarily. his advice made me go out on a limb and study what i love, rather than what i would have thought would make more money. as i am older and have a better understanding of the world, i realize that a college major does not define who someone is. someone’s attitude, values, and work ethics are what defines someone in their professional career. i am incredibly grateful to have my dad as a mentor during my early years. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ while i learned great amounts from what kyle told me, i also learned so much from observing his actions. as i grew older and was able to understand and judge character, i realized how much of a stand up person he was. as kyle was once a student at the university of notre dame, he often talked about his times and experiences there. one quote that i remember kyle telling our family came from father hesburgh, “there comes a time in life… where moral righteousness is more important than an empty victory” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye spring week two).we all love to get what we want in life, but this reminded me that we should always be ourselves and stand for our values in life. the satisfaction of a victory can be very nice, yet also very fleeting. standing for your values makes you respect yourself, creating a sense of satisfaction that lasts one’s entire life. sometimes when we push for victories just to boost our own egos, people can be hurt. it is important to remember that every person feels emotion, and think about how we may make others feel through our actions. i remember kyle frequently thinking about how others feel. when bad issues would arise, he often asked “why them and not me?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye spring week seven). it is important to remember that as humans we are always vulnerable, and something that could happen to someone else could always happen to us. that is why it is always important to help others. as i think back more about kyle’s life, i think this directly correlates with his humble personality. kyle would always remind the family to “remember your death” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye spring week three). while thinking about death can be morbid and heartbreaking, kyle was trying to make a point. remembering that everyone will eventually pass away is very humbling. this idea reminds us that as humans, we are all very similar. anything that we gain on this earth, such as “victories” are fleeting. while our victories https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html are short lived, we can set a precedent for how to live for future generations. the importance that kyle placed on righteousness and morality contributed to setting a better precedent for how other future generations can live. kyle was an example to me and others of how to live a fulfilling and righteous life. as i reflect on my dad’s life, i remember all of the happy and fulfilling moments that we spent together. he was an example for how i should live my life and interact with others. i truly remember kyle for his positivity, mentorship, and righteousness. kyle was a force for good in our world, and i intend on carrying on his legacy of making our world a better place. moreau integration professor thigpen moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 searching for me after my first few months of college, i have grown to realize what i am struggling with within myself. the moreau first year experience course has presented me with different ways of dealing with the issues i face as i transition into college. i believe that i am searching for self-love. i frequently find myself hesitating, doubting every decision i take, and worrying about what others think of me. i tend to pick apart my body in the mirror and focus on things that i don’t think compare well to current beauty standards. i have come to the realization that i struggle with self-love, and consequently lack self-confidence. i let this control my life, being somewhat apprehensive of going to campus events without a friend, or doing something on my own where i can be judged. in order to work towards living my life how i want to live it, i need to stop caring what others think of me. in order to do that, i need to develop self-love and confidence. after discovering what my personal issues were, i looked for steps to take to overcome them. for instance, following accounts on instagram that promote self-love and body-positivity helps me realize that others are going through similar circumstances and there is always a way to overcome them. one account that i follow said “do something today that your future self will thank you for” (@lexxhidalgo), and i have been trying to live by that for the past few weeks. not only is it helping me avoid procrastination with school work, but it is motivating me to do more for myself. previously in my week one qqc, i reflected on brene brown’s speech when she said, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). as i look back on this, i realize that there may be exceptions to this provision. i think that this idea of brene brown’s applies to a situation where i am trying to change myself to be like someone else i admire, or achieve something in order to prove something to others. the exception is that if you are working on improving yourself for yourself, it is okay. however, the separation between these is quite a large gray area, as anything in life is. in my case, i believe that i must let go of embodying others in order to be myself, but i must also change my routine to include things that will benefit my future self. i believe that i can work on myself by redistributing my time away from social media and towards activities where i solely interact with myself. for instance, journaling is something that i want to start doing before going to bed every night, which would replace the hour and a half i spend on my phone. not only will this hopefully allow me to get more sleep, but i think writing my thoughts down into a tangible form will help me find out more about myself. i also want to start focusing on doing things that i am passionate about doing, and learning when to say no to people when i don’t feel like doing it. i am striving to follow david brook’s concept in week 2, where he spoke about two sides of humanity: adam i and adam ii. he stated, “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses” should you live or your resume or your eulogy? by david brooksmoreau fye week two). it's important to note that adam i is the side of yourself you have to prove to others; adam ii is the side focused on the things about yourself that mean something to you. in my opinion, adam i is always a good thing to pursue; it keeps people adapting and improving themselves. however, adam ii should never be sacrificed for adam i, for it is adam ii that grounds us to nature, to each other, and to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=27s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&t=27s ourselves. while working on becoming comfortable with my own skin and working towards becoming someone i love, i will keep this quote close to me. while it is nice to be reaffirmed by what we are good at (building strengths), i think that this self-improvement journey will be more focused on breaking my weaknesses down and then reubuilding. i believe that reconnecting with my past helps me discover who i am. in week 6, we created our own “where i’m from'' poems. writing about the things that built my childhood, the good memories, and the members of my family who have impacted me made me realize how exactly this has built my personality. my childhood and my family caused me to appreciate every little action that someone doesevery little detail that makes me feel comforted and loved. i think that is what caused my top character strength in week 2 to be “appreciation of beauty.” to elaborate, i always receive an uplifting feeling when i walk around campus on a stressful day and catch a glimpse of the dome, or take a trip to the grotto. it’s nice to think about the time put into creating these symbolic structures, the tradition behind them, and how people bond over them which makes me push past my personal struggles and be reminded that there are bigger things in life than a calculus exam. i believe that i am pursuing strong and healthy relationships. i want to surround myself with people who encourage me to be my best self, people who don’t bring me down, and people who i can laugh with and feel comfortable being myself. in week four, the curriculum focused on forging life-giving relationships and i think that the following quote couldn’t explain my desires in a better way. “think back to a time where you felt uplifted, hopeful, and happy after hanging out with a friend. the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (5 signs you're in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylor, grottomoreau week https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships four). growing up in a small town meant that there weren’t many new people for me to meet, and consequently i was surrounded by the same friend group for years. entering college and meeting so many people all of a sudden made me realize that i can decide who i was to spend my time with; i didn’t have to make the relationships work if i didn’t want to. through meeting and encountering the personalities of so many people in such a short amount of time, i think that i have started to decide what qualities i look for in a friend and i will continue to search for these defining characteristics while making friends. i believe that i am looking for my purpose in life, and this purpose could mean many things. first, it involves my career, as that is what a large portion of our lives is centered around. i am currently pursuing a major in environmental engineering, but i am not completely certain about it. it is important to me that i find a career that supports my state of living comfortably, allows me to have a family and flexible working hours. due to the fact that so much of our time is spent working, i feel stressed in making the decision on what i want to do for hours and hours. while this decision seems daunting, i try to remind myself that no one really knows, for sure, what they want to do for their career. everyone simply applies for jobs, works, adapts, switches positions, gets promoted, or applies to different companies. therefore, there is always time for change; there are always opportunities to keep looking for something that interests me. father kevin grove c.s.c explained that, “if we’re really searching for truth in whatever we study, then we need both faith and reason” (two notre dames: your holy cross education by father kevin grovemoreau fye week five). in order to find my career, i need to follow my passion, but first i have to find what i am passionate about. i think that this comes with learning who i am, as i mentioned earlier. however, if i am searching for an answer about what i am supposed to do, i need to have faith in myself and in god. if i trust the process that god is bringing me on, while https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 also trusting myself along the way, i am sure to follow my passion. however, reason is also necessary, because in order to survive on my own, i must stay true to my responsibilities, even if they aren’t as pleasant as following my dreams. i believe that the other side of finding my life purpose will always adapt and change, but right now i believe that it is to find happiness through living in the moment and finding myself. in week 3, one particular quote stood out to me: “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding, to the best of your ability, as the person you know yourself to be, the person god has created you to be.” (the role of faith in our story by father pete c.s.c. moreau fye week three). i am told that on my journey of self-discovery, i must forget about success, productivity, and failure; although these three things are what i go through here at notre dame. i find myself focusing on the fact that i didn’t score high enough on my calc exam, or spending a large amount of my time on homework. although this may seem important now, they tend to consume most of my thoughts and distract me. in order to discover more about myself, i need to make time to focus on my feelings, desires, thoughts, etc. i will focus less on how i can do something “the best,” or in the most successful way, and instead remain faithful and trust in god and myself to respond how i would authentically respond. after that, i will find who i am and learn to love that myself as well. altogether, my transition to college has taught me many things about myself. most of my courses taught me the importance of hard work ethic, but moreau taught me not to “cultivate the mind and the expense of the heart,” as father moreau is famous for saying. the social life here at notre dame has altered my perspective on relationships and encouraged me to work on building stronger ones. notre dame, in and of itself, has helped me start to understand myself a little bit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=emb_logo better. now that i know what i must work on, i will strive to find time between my studies in order to spend time working on myself. keely mcglone father kevin moreau 26 february 2022 the method for manifesting joy what does it take to good in the world? if we knew, the world would be a flawless place. life is too nuanced and too unexpected. there is no exact formula to predict what it takes to do good, for mistakes and faults are human nature. however, we must prevail and form something close to the answer. the world aches for good, and it is my generation that is being tasked with soon providing it. a formula that is close to this goal comes from pope francis: “in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage, and we need creativity” (pope francis, 2017). i believe this statement is the best we have in present times, and these forces have cumulated into my convictions, all centered around doing good. without memory, we wouldn’t know the experiences that shaped us and what we are grounded in. they provide us a foundation of growth and support; we can grow from negative memories and find comfort in the positive ones. the memories i have from my nineteen years of life are what i hold closest, but they have made me biased for too long. one experience creates one memory, and i tend let the one memory define me. to this idea, i point to a couple core memories in my life. one of lesser significance: my mom made stuffing one night for dinner, and the following evening, i stayed up all night with the stomach bug. now, i refuse to eat stuffing. one memory has concealed me from an aspect of the world that is possibly worth exploring. one of greater significance, and one of my most prominent memories: an important relationship lost because of the effects of the past. putting aside the positive aspects of memories, memories can hinder growth. being too fixated on what happened at one point in your life can prohibit change in a similar instant. to combat this, introspection may be our best answer. dwelling on why a negative memory occurred and why it is impacting me so much creates a negative stigma surrounding what happened. tasha eurich in “the right way to be introspective” notes this idea: “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future. in addition to helping us gain insight, asking what instead of why can be used to help us better understand and manage our emotions” (tasha eurich, 2017). by practicing healthy introspection, i can pull value out of negative memories and transform them into positive experiences that shape my future. this idea connections to a conviction. i believe it is necessary to be an ever-evolving individual with the persistence to overcome experiences with reflective optimism. too much of my life i have submitted to negative memories, when instead, i should be focused on the positive ones and the joy they bring. pope francis secondly identifies creativity as a trait needed to do good in the world. in my life, creativity has been unnatural. i was never creative in the traditional forms; i had no musical or artistic talent, and the traditional school system led me to believe that these things solely defined creativity. growing up has expanded my mindset and definition of creativity and transformed it into something that i love about myself. it has looked more intellectual in my life. i find myself creatively thinking my way out of situations and problems in a way that others may not think to do. problem solving is a crucial part of daily life, so discovering this about myself has helped me find the value in creativity. it has given me the ability to solve difficult academic problems but also the ability to fix a fragmented relationship and practice love. for creativity has never been needed solely in an artistic or musical sense; that mindset is elementary. in the same ted talk previously mentioned, pope francis says, “yes, love does require a creative, concrete and ingenious attitude” (pope francis, 2017). creativity feeds into love, and love proposes meaning in the tumultuous, yet beautiful journey life. while i hope creativity can lead me towards an intellectually curious and impactful career, i need creativity more to foster relationships of love in my life. no matter where i end up in my career, i want to put love, and consequently happiness, first. this relates to one of my strongest convictions—that the meaning to life is to love. in my theology class, i learned that god created the world so that we could love. biblical scholars argue that taking away this creation story and focusing solely on scientific reasoning takes all the meaning out of life. people spend years trying to discover the meaning of life, and i think the answer lies right in front of us—to love. whether that is extracted from a religious text or from a reflection with creativity doesn’t change the value of this lesson. of the last of the three values pope francis mentions is courage, and courage is the trait i feel most grounded in. if i were to do good, it would be mostly due to courage. most serious decisions that come in life take courage because there is always a risk that it may harm you more than it benefits you. you have to be willing to take these risks for the betterment of the greater good, even if it may not be decisively best for you personally. courage is accompanied by selflessness and compassion, and hence, leadership. in my time as a leader on my soccer teams, i had to make decisions that came down for courage for a whole group that would turn back on me if unsuccessful. but the right decision always is standing for what is right, even if that is not easy. william deresiewicz defines this critical piece of leadership, “true leadership means being able to think for yourself and act on your convictions” (william deresiewicz, 2009). courage in leadership is not always visible. many people in my life have been quiet leaders. sometimes, quieter leaders are most effective because they spend time with themselves in solitude. they know what their convictions are because they are comfortable in thought. it is a courageous way to hold yourself. i believe that silent courage is just as notable as explicit courage. people we identify as courageous typically execute some heroic act like saving someone’s life, but isn’t standing up for your beliefs just as courageous? in a world as polarizing as today, it is inspiring to see people embracing these quieter acts of courage, for they have just as large of impacts. these three traits together create the potential to do good in the world, and they also create the potential for joy. father michael himes defines joy as, “it (joy) comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (father michael himes). living to do good is living in genuine rightness, which creates a life centered in joy. i believe living with these convictions derived from memory, courage, and creativity will create a future of joy. it is a refreshing idea. no matter the unexpected nature of the future, joy will be present in my life if i am grounded in these beliefs. brisny rodriguez flores professor comuniello moreau fye march 4, 2022 wandering feet: the love for travel and how it builds to a life well lived brisny rodriguez flores was born in uruapan, michoacan, mexico, on the first day of spring. and from the first day, one can see that she was going to be something great. she was a person who was often said to have suffered from wandering feet and wandering eyes. so much so that within the first year that she was born, one would have been able to see her hanging around in the united states, having moved to the country in less than 6 months after having been born. from there she traveled to many places in the us. she has visited disney world by the time she was 5 (and went on to visit more than 10 times). she has gone to hollywood beach to see some of the whitest sands she has ever seen and on her way there she ended up feeding a giraffe in miami zoo. she has visited savannah georgia, the most haunted area of georgia (her home state), and has even been to one of the islands that are close to its coast. she has gone to see a president be inaugurated in washington dc in virginia and had the opportunity to walk through a retired gold mine. and that was just when she was young. her curiosity and her drive to experience and try everything at least once, had continued to motivate her to continue her travels and her exploration of the world that she has lived in. . visiting far off places with a camera, a cat, and her computer by her side. her camera so that she could take pictures of everything she has seen. her cat for company and for protection form the demons and ghosts that she came across. her computer so that she could do her work as she worked as a programmer and animator for most of her life, having studied computer science and chinese at the university of notre dame. through all her travels, both young and old, she would continue to write her stories and she would continue to come back to georgia to visit her family. as one thing that was most important to her was her family. i even remember how she told me once, so long ago,her favorite thing to eat was el pozol and the caldo de rez that her mom made. i asked her why, if she’s tried so many delicacies through her travels, and her only reason was because it reminded her of how she grew up. she started to mainly focus on her creative pursuits later in life, when it finally became too dangerous for her to move around as much as she used to. she would continue to animate small projects, but she started to expand focusing on storytelling, with her last story ‘the children in the cargo train’, having been finished just before she was taken from us. she was a good person. sure she struggled in certain areas, but she kept going to achieve all that she had wanted to do. it was a sad day when we found out that the ovarian cancer that we previously thought was defeated, ended up relapsing. and it was an even sadder day when it finally took her from us. may her family recover and her memory live on. writing one’s eulogy makes a person think about what they value in life. do they value their family, money, children, traveling or do they value a combination of different criteria? friendships and experiences, what is that motivates them to keep going and to meet the world head on? in the movie ‘hesburgh’ (“hesburgh '' produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two), father hesburgh states that he ‘ wanted students to face the country's issues instead of running away. i wanted them to speak their minds while allowing those that disagreed with them to do the same. i wanted the students to protest in respect even in the face of hatred.’ it seems throughout the film that one of father hesburgh's motivators in life were his students, and as a result that caused him to help them in one of most profound ways he could, and that was by helping them find their true selves. that is to say that he cared and wanted his students to find their own motivations and wants in their own life, and thereby causing them to live a life well-lived. a life similar to his own, not in events or in experiences, but in feelings. one that they won’t regret or grow to resent. of course that still brings in the questions of what makes a life worth living? and this is where the eulogy becomes difficult, as for what exactly is it that i value? what is it that i want to do with my life? what is it that i value today and therefore what i hope to continue to have in the future? in ‘5 minutes’ (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotta moreau fye week six) jd kim states that “... i was always so focused on what i cannot do… but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others…so as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope.”through what he said, i was able to realize one of my main struggles, and that was that i always focused on the negative. i degraded myself, and berated myself in a way my own mom wouldn’t do. and in doing so, i never valued what and who i have with me now. in fact it wasn’t until i read ‘meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die’ ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three) that i realized that the way i viewed things and my own situation ends up inherently devaluing the people and items i have and that i love. not only did it disvalue these people, but it also ended up creating barriers between everyone that i talked to. this way of thinking ended up unconsciously creating a ‘theme v. i’ mentality that placed these people under a jurisdiction, similar to the one’s that is described in chapter 8 of ‘tattoos on the heart’ (“chapter 8: jurisdiction' ' from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i placed people in these jurisdictions that i have made, some made from my own outlook and others made from how i was raised (that is to say from my own community's fears and views). as a result i couldn’t or i struggled to connect to people, to the point where one of my friends even noticed. with my friend subtly pointing it out in the discernment activity, by saying that she wanted me to remember that my’ friends are here to help and that i just need to reach out’ (activity:complete”week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). as a result of her comment, i decided that i wanted my future to be one of connection. so i started to reflect. but not in the way that is described by lyer in “why we need to slow down our lives' ' (' 'why we need to slow down our lives' ' by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). instead of disconnecting in the way described, i just started to write. i wrote without thinking, and i find when i do that i often end up realizing what i care about or what i truly want to write about. and in doing so i fully realized that i want to travel and i want to make my future one about connections. i want to travel the world in a way my parents have been unable to do and i wanted to be able to connect to be people in a profound way, similar to how it is mentioned in my eulogy through my mention of travel and storytelling, as it is my personal opinion that to be great at both, one needs to be able to connect with people. and i’m going to try my best to connect with people and to travel, while still doing what i love. and that is that i like to code. in ‘navigating your career journey’ they state ​​“what do you find yourself losing yourself in ?” ( “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four), and i find that i lose myself when i code or when i am writing stories. so i wish to be able to do all of this in my future. either simultaneously or at different times in my life, as conveyed in my eulogy. third integration yerania serrato-bucio maria finan moreau first year experience 26 february 2022 third integration alternate prompt (describe a life well-lived) what is a life well-lived? there are many different definitions for what it means to live a well-lived life. everyone has their own values, morals, and priorities in life which would impact what one thinks a life well-lived means. some factors are more important to some people than others but there are a few broader overlapping factors of life that a majority of people seem to share when it comes to living a well-lived life. overall, they are to have times of pause and reflection to stay sane and keep doing better, making an effort to do something impactful in the world and have meaningful experiences. to start, it’s important to stay healthy, both mentally and physically in order to live out our well-lived lives. our lives get busy with work, school, and other responsibilities that we can’t escape from. sometimes things can get very overwhelming because things pile up and everyone needs a break at times. there are moments when we don’t even know we need a break but others see how it’s impacting our wellbeing. for example, during my conversation with my friend mariela, she mentioned that i need to sometimes take a break from my school work, take a breather, go back to work and make sure to give myself grace if i don’t get the desired score ("discernment conversation activity" by yerania serrato-bucio moreau fye week 5). i knew she was right because i had been cramming calculus into my brain and i was struggling to solve simple problems. i ended up taking a break, going to sleep, and coming back to it the next day during office hours and ended up not needing help. i knew how to do it but was just overwhelmed. the lesson in this is that if we just keep working without taking time away from it, we will end up being burnt out and the quality of our work won’t be its best. also, taking mental breaks is important to make sure our mental health is okay because we won’t be living a life well-lived if everything else is okay but internally we are struggling with finding happiness in our work or being able https://docs.google.com/document/d/1s0kbx0pqveeklkremybwpl5kbwe0hr4y6n6iitnqfh4/edit?usp=sharing to enjoy its completion. our mind must be in a good place to fully live a well-lived life. additionally, taking time for ourselves helps us to reflect and think about things from a different perspective. sometimes we need to conceptualize where we are in our lives to make sense of it all and make sure things are going in a way that we are comfortable with. as stated in pico iyer’s ted talk, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this means that by analyzing what we’ve done in our lives we can see if we are satisfied and ask ourselves if we are living a good and well-lived life. it allows us to see what we would like to change and how we can learn from our mistakes. there’s a lot of potential for growth if we sometimes just take a step back from everything we’re occupied with. we should also strive to improve the world as best we can for the sake of others and ourselves to live a well-lived life. there are many examples of people who have made an effort to do good in the world and impacted the lives of many. we can learn much from their life missions and continue through with their work. for example, fr. ted hesburgh did a lot of work for the civil rights movement and a lot of influential work for catholic universities. current university president fr. john jenkins said, “ted was a bridge builder between people and god and among people” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). this speaks to fr. ted’s work as a priest in which he did god’s work here on earth and helped people but also speaks to his character in which he helped people connect with one another. the ability to bring people together is a very strong trait that we must be open to. i think that our lives will be better well-lived if more people respected each other even if we hold differences of opinion. it allows for more peace of mind and less unnecessary conflict. we can at least make an effort to get along and if it doesn’t work out at least be civil. fr. gregory shared a similar message in chapter 8 of his book tattoos on the heart in which he said, “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. gregory boyle moreau fye week seven). shared hardships can bring people together and it’s important to come together to combat certain https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149141 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149193 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/167901 situations which can sometimes only be done if we put our differences aside. this form of community building leads to living a more well-lived life because you know people will be there and you’ll be there for others. i hope to become a person that people can come to for support because i have many people here at notre dame who have made up my support system and are there to listen to me and i want to pass on that kindness to others. there are times when it is difficult to try to change the world when there is so much going on and many situations are out of our control, especially global issues. that can be hard to grasp and it can negatively impact our mental health which is why it is important to realize that one person doesn’t have to solve everything alone and to remember to focus on what is in our power. sometimes knowing we did our best to make a difference is most important. as mentioned by aria swarr, “ focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” ("5 minutes" by aria swarr moreau fye week six). we should prioritize what we can do in a given moment and figure out how we can help rather than thinking about everything we can’t do. it helps in maintaining a more positive mindset which is part of living a well-lived life. i tend to overthink things and it’s easy to fall into a spiral where one feels useless. last semester, my sociology class ended with how society is destroying the planet and it’s going to end in around 50 years. we all felt so useless but i talked to my mom and she said that even if i die in 20 years as long as i did my part to try and help i should be able to die in peace which is the goal. finally, to live a life well-lived, we must have some meaningful personal experiences. it’s important to help others and do the most for those around us but there are times when we must have some moments for ourselves. our time here is limited and we must make the best of it for ourselves. like sister aletheia said, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three) we’re all going to die which is somewhat sad and scary but many use that as motivation to try and live the best life they can and enjoy as much of it as possible. also, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149414 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149414 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ center for career development moreau fye week four). when having moments for ourselves and doing things we want to do we can grow in different ways like figuring out our passions, our dislikes, and having moments of inspiration. in sociology i learned how everything impacts our perspectives and attitudes, including environment, society, and other combined factors, so it’s best to take chances and have fun in life. that’s how we develop as people and end up living a well-lived life. in conclusion, i feel that a well-lived life involves service, having personal meaningful experiences, and times of reflection. i try to implement these things in my life as much as i can but it’s difficult at times to find the balance between obligations, responsibilities, and working on having a well-lived life because not everything aligns perfectly. here at notre dame handbells is what i’m passionate about and enjoy the most which helps contribute to making my time here meaningful but classes are hard and i’m struggling but through balance and support i’m powering through. i’m a part of matriculate so i help serve high schoolers which i think is fun and is helping change other students' lives. i think i am living a well-lived life right now. i have everything i could need and i’m grateful for all of the opportunities i’ve had. i hope to continue living a well-lived life because it hasn’t always been this way. i’ll end this by saying that my definition of a well-lived life is that you did your best. you learned from your mistakes, grew, and continued to do better because our best is all we can do and there’s nothing wrong with that. moreau integration three mckenzie williams prof. bushman integration three march 4, 2022 mckenzie williams a life of many values good afternoon. i would first like to thank all of you for coming to celebrate a loved one's life. we are gathered here today to remember mckenzie elizabeth williams, a woman who has had a great impact on everyone here and whom we all love greatly. mckenzie was a hard-working, compassionate, self-reflecting individual and also a great friend, daughter, sister, mom, and companion. she took great pleasure in doing activities that were of interest to her, but that could also have an impact on others. one thing mckenzie came to value was learning the importance of self-reflection. mckenzie excelled at taking a moment to rest and just step back to reflect on life and make sure she was on the right path; not losing focus on herself. when something wasn’t quite going right, she would take a break and do something else. similar to the idea iyer says, “that’s the reason american football players prefer to go into a huddle rather than just race toward the line of scrimmage, the reason a certain kind of writer will include a lot of blank space on a page, so his sentences have room to breathe (and his readers, too)” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i think mckenzie got this idea from cheerleading back in her young days. whenever she would have days where her stunt would continue to fall or she could not land a tumbling pass, she would take a deep breath and get a water break to get her mind off the frustration. mckenzie in this same way would not dwell on the past; she wanted to maximize her time most efficiently. this idea of self-reflection played an important role for https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ mckenzie in deciding her career. we all know her as the caring, hardworking, local orthodontist, but it wasn’t an easy decision in getting there. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). mckenzie understood how important this decision was, and knew that this could not be a rushed process. she used her skill of self-reflection by stepping back and exploring multiple careers before deciding that orthodontia was her passion and calling. she ended up choosing a career in a field that had an impact on her childhood. mckenzie has made an impact on many through her career, the same way her orthodontist impacted and influenced her. this career fit her wholeheartedly, and she was able to dedicate enough time to her family who she valued more than anything. in mckenzie’s self-reflection, she was focused on bettering herself and using the right ways to do so. sometimes you don’t want to hear things that are necessary, but knowing these things can help you become a better version of yourself. that was something mckenzie knew well that we could all learn from. as eurich said, “a good rule of thumb, then, is that why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). mckenzie would reflect and practice asking these “what” questions to better understand her emotions. a thing everyone should know is that your emotions can better show you what next steps to take. not only did mckenzie practice self-reflection, but she did it in the right way that reduced stress, anxiety, and depression. she practiced this skill a lot in college when she would be stressed with school work. mckenzie would take a pause from the chaotic time and just relax, which allowed https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ her to better understand the emotions she was feeling and how to respond to them. this value of self-reflection is something we can all learn from mckenzie and practice it to live a better life. another thing mckenzie valued was her interests and taking part in activities that would impact others. mckenzie did things because she thought it was the right thing to do, not because of what others thought she should do. father hesburgh said, “at a university you cannot censor ideas if they disagree with your own. i told him if you withdraw this book, i resign as president. well that book sold out, and i kept my job” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh and mckenzie walked the same campus, and she learned from his legacy the importance of standing up for what you believe in and understanding that it is in our power as individuals to fix something in the world if we believe it is wrong. mckenzie wanted to make a positive difference in the world, so when she believed in something, she stood strong to that belief. while in her college years at the university of notre dame, mckenzie wanted to join a club where she could help make a difference in someone’s life. she ultimately decided to join camp kesem. this club had a lasting impact on mckenzie, where she was able to be there for children whose parents were suffering from cancer. mckenzie once had a conversation with her mom, where later she expressed to me, “a main theme throughout the conversation was my work ethic and determination to accomplish goals, but also teamwork and helping others (something i had not really thought about myself). my mom said that what i most desired in life was doing things of interest and being able to have an impact on others.” (“qqc 5” by mckenzie williams moreau fye week five). as all of you here know, mckenzie was an extremely hard worker; when she set a goal, she was determined to accomplish it. these goals were often oriented around specific interests she had: cheerleading, academics, interactions with others, etc. whatever the interest was, she gave her https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tmjo473kmgnjpuz3wj4mps7pkodw2fyrxgbh77dthui/edit full effort and attention to it, and whenever she could help someone in the process she would take full advantage of the opportunity. the one thing that probably mattered most to mckenzie was her relationships in life. she was constantly surrounded by others and sustained lifelong friendships with people from her childhood and college years. she was someone who thrived in working with others, where she used people as a support system but was also there for them in return. all of you here had some sort of relationship with mckenzie, so you all know how deeply relationships mattered to her. as himes once said, “to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.). the fostering of a community of friends who can be honest with us and whom we can genuinely hear, before whom and with whom we can be open and humble” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). mckenzie, thanks to everyone here, had a great support system filled with family and friends who she looked to for guidance when necessary. i’m sure if she were standing here today she would tell you how grateful she is for each and every one of you, as i’m sure you all would say the same to her. she used feedback from the people who knew her best to grow and improve to become the best person she could be. in many ways, we would be lost as human beings without help from the people around us. mckenzie understood that she was the ultimate person who decided what she wanted to do in life, but valued and knew that the people around her could help her get there. pope francis says, “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). pope francis knows the interactions we have with people help ultimately shape who we are. mckenzie and pope francis knew that it is essential in life to have people around us. she understood that we impact others even through the smallest https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript interactions. that is why you never saw her in the orthodontist's office without a smile on her face! she wanted to positively impact all her patients, and she knew that every encounter has an impact. so, as i have stood here and discussed some of mckenzie’s essential values in life, we can conclude that she lived a truly well-lived life. it was an honor to know someone like her, and i hope we can all appreciate the impact she has had on us. today we are mourning the loss of a loved one, but we are also celebrating a great life. mckenzie, we will miss you immensely, but the legacy you left behind will never be forgotten. microsoft word week 8integration three.docx resting for a life well-lived the first eight weeks of my second semester shaped and molded the person i became. my friendships, faith, and knowledge grew, forever imprinted into the book of my life. i learned more about myself and how i intended the rest of my life to proceed. i contemplated the impact i wished to make, desiring to be satisfied with what i leave behind. faced with obstacles, i drew upon my internal strength to overcome trials and persevere. i grew stronger and built-up confidence that aided in future endeavors. this outcome came from allotted time for mindfulness and devotion to fruitful friendships, which together aided in my creation of a definition for a life well-lived. when i first started the second semester, i was very overwhelmed and discouraged. my schedule proved to be very challenging, and i often second guessed my decision to continue my notre dame education. i fell into the trap of comparison, contrasting my life to those of my friends who were at the university of florida (uf). the “what if?” question popped into my head multiple times a day. i envisioned what my life would have been like at uf and felt guilty for the difference in tuition my dad was paid. then when we had our first moreau assignment, which looked at the text by pico iyer “why we need to slow down our lives,” i was frustrated. i grew angry at myself and notre dame for such a hard schedule yet taught that we needed to rest. so, in that first week i did the only thing i could think of, i turned to god and prayed. i then reached out to my advisor and asked if there was anything i could do differently, and although i first received a no, she eventually helped me adjust my classes. i was relieved and thought back to what iyer said, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (text: "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). it was in that moment that i could feel the impact of this statement. i just needed to trust in god to provide for me the rest i needed. when i freed the time for this rest, i became happier and remembered my love of notre dame. once i was reminded of the importance that rest was to my mental and physical health, i made an effort to allocate moments of mindfulness throughout my day. i practiced changing my perspective into one like dr. johoon kim has, looking at how to overcome obstacles rather than focusing on them ( video: “5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). i incorporated mindful practices such as nightly devotionals, prayers throughout my day, and meditation, as suggested from the mindfulness menu (open activity: complete one practice: “ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being – moreau fye week six). these moments to myself began to have impacts in many aspects. i felt happier and equipped with more patience. i noticed smaller instances of beauty around campus and found tranquility while i walked between classes. when i was with others, i became more empathetic and understanding, which fostered stronger connections. i took to heart the words that pope francis said, “through the darkness of today's conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (video/text: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven). in my nightly prayers, i asked god to use me as an instrument of his will and to be a light to others. i knew that i wanted to be remembered by others as someone who was devoted to christ, who treated others with kindness and love. while i did not always fulfill this goal, i tried most days to be there for my friends and seek out those who were struggling. through devotion of time to my friends, i matured and became surer of the person i wanted to be. i looked to my friends for inspiration of how i wanted to continue living my life. i felt influenced by my teachers and especially father hesburgh. the movie “hesburgh” enlightened me about how impactful father hesburgh was, a figure i knew nothing about prior to my arrival at notre dame (video: "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). i was encouraged and infused by his lasting presence on campus, as someone who was a champion for human rights and a care seeker for the poor. i gained a new perspective on what a life well-lived is through learning about father hesburgh. a life well-lived is not about material success, but about finding personal fulfillment and then giving yourself to others. it is through this that rewarding relationships can be created. i then turned to what would fulfill me. this was promoted by the “three key questions” as proposed by father michael himes (download "three key questions" by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3). i asked myself what was truly important to me and whether this fit into my planned career. i felt that if i continuously asked these questions, i would feel content with the inevitable end of my life, similar to sister aletheia’s theory ( text/audio: "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). when i was directed to think about my future career plans, the career center’s activities eased my concerns. once i heard that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip,” i was reassured that i did not have to decide immediately (text: "navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). i felt that some pressure was alleviated as i could break up my career search into smaller components. a great place to have started was with my conversation with my sister. she gave me an outside perspective on what she observed about me. i found it interesting on how her observations about me fit into what i strived to be, making an impact on others and my environment (activity: complete "week five discernment conversation activity" – moreau fye week 5). overall, notre dame shaped who i became. i learned that through moments of peace and self-reflection, i was more whole and connected to god. by dedication of time to myself, i gave more to my friendships which in turn gave more back to me. finally, through the coupling of these components, i gained a new perspective on what a life well-lived is and can thank the notre dame education for this. microsoft word integration.docx what makes up ? core beliefs are detrimental to the feeling of fulfillment, since everybody should have goals, morals, and values that they stick to throughout the journey of life. i have eight core beliefs that i came up with during the moreau course. core belief number one: i believe that i am searching for happiness and success. my definition of success correlates mostly to monetary value, however, i combine happiness and success because i would rather be happy and okay financially than miserable and rich. this creates my biggest goal: finding a career that makes me both happy and rich. the quote, “...we all know that feeling, that "i'm not blank enough, i'm not thin enough, rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, promoted enough." (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one) really drives this core belief. i am searching for both happiness and success, but will i ever be satisfied? whenever i achieve something, i cherish that moment temporarily, but then immediately look towards my next challenge to complete. core belief number two: i believe that i forge meaningful relationships by opening up to people and discussing things you otherwise wouldn’t with others. allowing someone to see the real you and your raw emotions is amazing, because that allows both you and them to feel comfortable around each other. this comfortability will create an exchange of emotions from both people, creating a flow of positivity and confidence. by opening up, you are showing your vulnerability, which in turn builds trust, which is one of the most important ideals in meaningful relationships. “they repeatedly bail on you.” (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship – moreau fye week four) is one sign of a bad relationship, so by allowing others to see your true feelings, and you seeing theirs, will create a relationship built upon each other (hopefully not so much where they rely solely on each other) that cannot be formed without sharing. in turn, this will cause neither person to repeatedly bail or hurt one another. core belief number three: i believe that my purpose is to find a career that i am passionate about and truly love doing. this belief is very similar to the first belief, as both are about careers. i am taking a year off college to pursue my passion of becoming a youtuber. many people advise me not to do this, but i cannot stand and watch my dreams potentially go down the drain. i realize i can do both college and filming, but i want to truly take time to dedicate most of my energy towards my passion. “we happen to live in a society that favors adam i, and often neglects adam ii. and the problem is that turns you into a shrewd animal who treats life as a game, and you become a cold, calculating creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity where you realize there's a difference between your desired self and your actual self.” (ted talk by david brooks – moreau fye week two). this quote perfectly reflects my feelings. i just cannot see myself sitting behind a desk my whole life or working a traditional job, rather i see myself creating, exploring, and having fun with life. this mediocrity that brooks speaks about, to me at least, is living that mapped out life everybody expects: go to college, get a job, marry, have kids, etcetera, but that life just does not seem fulfilling. the way i view life is that i am eighteen years old, so there is really nothing on the line for me to lose. also, life is so short and when i’m dead nobody is really going to care whether i was a youtuber or a lawyer, as long as i contributed to society for the better good and had a positive impact on the world. core belief number four: i believe that i grow up by getting out of my comfort zone and being original. my personality is complicated to understand: i’m an introvert with my family, but an extrovert with my friends and strangers. why is this? i think it is because i may feel as if i cannot truly express myself in front of my family without being judged, even though they are extremely loving and would never judge me. i am working on getting out of my comfort zone because this in turn will forge life meaning relationships. in my videos i am working on getting out of my comfort zone by doing things that i never thought i could do, such as yelling in public around a bunch of people. “...each knot is unique, when attempting to remove the knot do not operate under the false belief that what you did before will work this time around; instead, you are far better off looking at each knot with a fresh set of eyes.” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. – moreau week 3). this quote is all about the approach of issues. in order to conquer issues, fears, and other obstacles, originality is extremely important. i cannot change and grow into who i am meant to be if i am unable to change and grow my mind and my thought process as well. core belief number five: i believe that i am responsible for my life and my success. nobody else will cause me to succeed, only i can control that based on my work ethic and dedication. however, especially in the world of youtube, you need other people to help you succeed. this was not in a moreau session, but lil yachty said, “you can do anything that you truly put your mind to, but in order to do it you have to first attempt…manually go out there and get it on your own.” this quote is one of the most inspirational ones i have ever heard because it reinforces the idea that you will always fail at something if you never try it. you are responsible for making your life how you choose, nobody can make your life decisions for you. core belief number 6: i believe that i pursue truth by thinking deep and through my political and religious beliefs. i have always been engaged and interested in politics my entire life. i love debating topics and researching to find evidence on why i support what i support. without these political and religious beliefs, i would have no values or no moral compass, which would put me in a position to feel unmotivated to cause positive change in the world. week six was the “where i’m from” poem, and this week of discussing our backgrounds shows that my environment i grew up in forms these beliefs. i grew up catholic and in pensacola, florida, a predominately republican county. i am both catholic and republican (sorry to get political l), but i greatly value my religious and political views and i am not afraid to speak out publicly about what i believe in and what i don’t believe in. i stay involved in the political world and greatly value discerning what i believe is right and wrong in america. i am not so into my beliefs that i cannot be swayed by the other side, because i have changed my mind on numerous topics before, so discussion with both sides is a big part in forming these root beliefs. core belief number 7: i believe that my community should stop being so sensitive. “what struck me was this: she had felt sorry for me even before she saw me. her default position toward me, as an african, was a kind of patronizing, well-meaning pity.” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie – moreau week seven). this quote portrays how i feel about american society right now. everybody is so focused on emphasizing with others and it’s gotten to a point where everybody is a victim. you may be wondering why this is important enough to be a core belief, but it is because this sensitivity in society really angers me at the core. we are coming to live in a time where anything anybody says can become offensive and peoples’ careers are being ruined from something they said 20 years ago. back in the day teens fought in wars, now they do tiktok dances, and this just does not sit right with me. i just think we as americans need to toughen up and just live our lives and go our separate ways with others if we disagree rather than starting fights and polarization. the sooner we realize we are all humans and americans, the sooner we can unite as one country again and this is necessary for everybody’s success. so, i guess this core belief can really be seen as nationalism because america is the best country in the world, and i just really want to preserve that. core belief number 8: i believe that i am made to create my own path and succeed on my own terms. this is very similar to core belief number five, yet slightly different.: “...while we can all get more money, more houses, cars, and things, we can never get more time.” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris). this embodies the final core belief, because time is more valuable than money. i truly believe my path in life is one of entertainment and creativity. this is also one of the hardest fields to make it in, so i am not in it for the money, more the passion. my taking a year i will allocate much more time into this passion, hopefully causing this dream to become a reality. everybody has a different path in life, and we need to not conform to someone else’s idea for our own path, rather we need to create and follow our own path. overall, my core beliefs are built upon searching for happiness, monetary success, and my political and religious views (mostly political). week 13integration moreau first year experience david lassen december 3, 2021 to question or not to question what interests me? from cooking, comedy, medicine, programming and architecture, there was a period in my life where i was sure that each of those fields was my destiny. today, i still am fascinated by all of those disciplines, but i lack the assurance and clarity i had as a kid. applying to college, i wanted to make the smart decision and apply for a computer science degree, a career that would provide me with stability in my life. now at college, i am constantly hearing the advice to explore my interests and not to be afraid to change my major. at first, exploration seemed scary, trying to balance what i like with what i want to do, all while being realistic and responsible. but then i realized how i was overcomplicating the whole process. i believe exploration should be as reverend king describes: “yearn to look out upon the world like the awestruck shepherds” (holy cross and christian education by rev. james b. king, c.s.c moreau fye week twelve). the author implies that learning should be an experience that prompts further inquiry and appreciation. king’s words poetically encapsulate the innate curiosity and adoration i hope to find in my studies at notre dame. to better practice this next semester, i am taking a diverse range of classes, allowing me to explore multiple interests without the restriction of a major. with each class, i will fully immerse myself in the topic and use my interest in it to guide my educational path forward. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23646/files/190575?module_item_id=107412 how do i want to spend my time? coming from a small-town high school, it was pretty easy to get involved in my community and school. by the end of my senior year, i had tried just about everything my school had to offer: sports, musicals, service, academics clubs and student government. going into college, i knew i would not be able to commit myself to so many things and would have to narrow my involvement. but after walking around the 400+ offerings at the club fair, deciding where to spend my time became a lot more difficult than i initially thought. after signing up for anything that sounded interesting and getting bombarded with emails, i then had to decide which club meetings i actually wanted to attend. i tried to go to as many clubs as my schedule would allow, still feeling the pressure to do as much as i could. but parker palmer’s article reminded me that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received” (thirteen ways of looking at community by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). palmer eloquently argues for the value of immersing oneself in their community, to relish in offerings provided. with the mind-set i had, that a community must be achieved, i was spreading myself thin trying to be a part of everything, not able to fully engage with the school and south bend community. after taking time to reflect on this, i have prioritized what extracurriculars i want to deeply engage with: volunteering in south bend, pre-medical society, and cs for good. looking forward to next semester, i feel confident that i will use my time to benefit myself and my community. how will i be vulnerable with myself? i have heard from my older siblings that the friends you make in college are going to be some of your best friends for life. having already had a great group of friends at home, i was a http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ little hesitant towards this advice. how could i make friends in 4 years that could compare anywhere near the friendships built over the past 18 years of my life? coming into welcome weekend, with everyone i met i had this underlying pressure that they may be my new best friends but i was so unsure how i would get from acquaintance to best friend level. i was putting too much pressure on myself to have these immediate connections with people. eventually, this pressure led to me crying in my dorm room the night after the first day of classes. but as said by kirsten helgeson, “hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing” (women find healing through kintsugi workshop by kirsten helgeson moreau fye week ten). helgeson claims there is value in emotional pain, as it allows us to repair and grow in our understanding of ourselves. from her diction of “breakable”, i am reminded that i will face multiple emotional challenges in college. but with each challenge, i know i will grow and learn something new from the experience and about myself. going forward, i will use these moments of heartbreak as a check-in with myself. i will let myself really feel these feelings, and use that to guide how i improve my stature. how will i present myself? the first time i was congratulated for the impressiveness of committing to notre dame by a family friend, i responded with “oh thank you, i got off the waitlist though.” i was unable to receive this compliment and immediately tried to talk myself down. this was my first battle with imposter syndrome. my parents, after witnessing this, told me i did not need to tell people i got in off the waitlist, that i still deserved to be congratulated. so, i had to improve the way i was presenting myself to others. coming to school, i followed the advice of elizabeth cox, “to combat imposter syndrome is to talk about it” (what is imposter syndrome and how can you https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo combat it? by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). cox’s argument that the more you are honest with others, the more others will be honest with you, thus reducing the feeling of being an “imposter”. as my peers and i shared our process of deciding where to go to school, i told my story, they told theirs, and i never felt judged. the difference this time was i proudly shared how i got in, as getting in off the waitlist was part of my journey to notre dame, but it would not define my experience here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zquxl4jm1lo integration musgrave 1 a life well-lived: defining my life for others mission statement the primary mission of my life is to impact others; to find true fulfillment, i seek a deep commitment to the amplification of others’ voices and interests, ultimately bringing solidarity and support to my communities. whether in my career, in relationships, or in everyday life, making the world a better place through small, direct action is a necessary priority in my personal fulfillment. one person can make a significant difference in the lives of many; i hope to achieve this by committing to change. a career that is worthwhile in life must be one that creates change. the establishment of equitable public policies, litigative support for the vulnerable, and social advocacy for impactful causes can impact the lives of many. however, the work often goes underpaid, and thus, understaffed in our society. i seek to change that; by using my privilege to advocate for those without it, i will create necessary impact. while i do not follow catholicism, i feel strongly in the idea of “liberation theology”; in acting upon strong moral convictions, i must seek to free those in inferior social positions from oppression, advocating for a more equal and equitable society. my ability to create change is innately nurtured by academics, relationships, and other experiences. each will allow me to better understand the world around me in far deeper manners. hence, i will foster these important aspects of a well-rounded life, letting them build my character and perspective to achieve my goals more effectively. change is not made overnight – it takes time, perspective, and dedication to a cause. i will act upon these principles to obtain my primary, personal goal: social impact. further articulation truly following my mission statement throughout my life requires several personal commitments; the traits i value in myself, and the ideals i maintain, must align directly with my mission. as i progress forward throughout my life, i will show an observable commitment to three primary topics: diversity of musgrave 2 perspective, solidarity, and mental fortitude. if i continue to stress the importance of each, my experiences and actions will align directly with my mission. diversity of perspective actively listening to the ideas of those with opposing perspectives and experiences is necessary to best serve a flowing, diverse community. this is a trait that notre dame’s father hesburgh valued immensely – the film hesburgh, “father hesburgh, throughout his tenure at the university, always wanted to bring in different views, whether that was a republican president, or democratic president…sometimes we get passionate about our own personal causes, or the causes we have great faith in, but he was always a person that could look at the wider picture, understanding that people of good-will can disagree.” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau fye week two) even if we believe our perspective is the “correct” one, understanding the ideas and values of others allows us to see a greater picture of our society, identifying points of division and addressing them more effectively. however, many do not accept others’ perspectives, leading to diminished communal knowledge, as stated by dr. paul blaschko: “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree, which is accelerating political polarization.” ("how to avoid an echochamber" by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye week eleven) as a hopeful career policymaker or litigator, it is necessary that i listen to all sides of a given story to create the most effective changes that accompany everyone’s interests. hence, in my everyday life, i will listen to diverse perspectives to craft the most effective solutions to serve others, ultimately fulfilling my personal mission and achieving observable impacts. another way that perspective can be built is through experience – as stated by the meruelo family center for career development, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development, moreau fye week four) every experience, whether at notre dame or otherwise, can shape me as an individual. through experiences in the student policy network and student government, i have found deep passions in service and policy. experiences in high school showed me my passion for https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ musgrave 3 law, as reminded by a discernment conversation with a former teacher (“week five discernment conversation activity” by , moreau fye week five). i hope to allow my experience in spain this summer, as well as the plentiful experiences i have throughout my time here, to further develop my mission, fostering my service and leadership in impactful manners. solidarity a commitment to solidarity with those in less privileged situations than your own is necessary to be an effective public servant. however, it is important that instead of speaking for these individuals, we lift up their voices – as stated by professor steve reifenberg, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless. this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.” ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by professor steve reifenberg, moreau fye week nine) such a goal requires extensive service to promote the economic and social well-being of unprivileged community members, so that they can advocate for themselves effectively. this becomes especially pertinent when considering the state of our world today, with racism and human rights violations rampant throughout the united states and elsewhere – as stated by notre dame law school dean g. marcus cole, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed.” ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something." by marcus cole, moreau fye week twelve) after identifying this, marcus cole did not sit idly by; he took action, describing several steps that notre dame could take to embrace solidarity with the oppressed in our society. throughout my time at notre dame, i hope to use the resources and values the school provides to advocate for the most vulnerable in our community, like i have through experiences with show some skin and even the student policy network. these actions align with basic christian values, as described by fr. michael himes when he stated, “the central issue in being a human being, and therefore in being a christian, is what the new testament calls agape – a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other.’” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes, moreau fye week three). in direct https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425/download?download_frd=1 musgrave 4 service to others, i can give myself to those who need it the most, defining my life by social impact and solidarity. mental fortitude true social impact is immensely difficult; thus, if i want to create meaningful change, i will face significant obstacles on my way. however, if i am able to accept myself, reflect upon my experiences, and look toward the future, i can move past each obstacle effectively and continue to achieve my goals. accepting yourself on a catholic campus can certainly be difficult – as stated by jacob walsh in an article in “grotto”, “in my mind, there were two alternatives: either i was not attracted to men — not permanently, anyway — or god did not love me. if he loved me and i was gay, he would make me straight. i thought admitting to myself that i was gay would make it true.” ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh, moreau fye week ten) this shows the immense difficulty of embracing your own humanity alongside swallowing community norms. however, if you truly accept yourself, like walsh did, you can not only embrace your own humanity, but begin to embrace inclusion elsewhere. in accepting myself for my perceived flaws, i will be able to accept others for their differences as well. in accepting myself, i must also accept and reflect upon my past. the busy nature of everyday life can often cloud our minds and rid our focus – however, to combat this, we can take the advice of pico iyer: “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, moreau fye week one). in taking a step back and understanding my big picture, i can refocus into my personal mission, further advocating for those around me. finally, i must move past obstacles i face in service, not allowing them to hinder my ultimate mission. if i continue to linger on my failures, i can never move past them. this phenomenon is shown in a study described by tasha eurich, who stated, “asking “why?” in one study appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward.” ("the right way to be introspective https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149863 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149919 musgrave 5 (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich, moreau fye week 6). instead of searching for reasons why i failed, i must focus on reasons why i should keep pushing for the changes i hope to see in the world. conclusion through commitment to my mission, i will create observable social, political, and economic change that will make our society a better place. however, acting upon my mission statement is no easy-task: social impact is truly daunting, considering the great amount of work required to fix gaping societal issues. nevertheless, if i maintain diversity of perspective, commitment to solidarity, and mental fortitude throughout my life, i have no doubt that i can achieve great impacts to the communities i seek to change. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149919 moreau integration 1 finding the best path to success and happiness i believe that everyone has a bigger purpose in their life, whether it is to fulfill some role, complete certain tasks, or follow a specific dream. throughout my whole life, i have been able to experience all types of pathways that led me in different directions. the best thing about that was the opportunity to try new things and see which ones really interested me. those experiences helped me shape what i wanted to do, who i wanted to be, and how i wanted to live my life. my root beliefs stem from all of the pathways i have taken in my life, through thick and thin. i believe that my purpose is to make the world the best place it can be. although this looks different for everyone, my vision is that i can do this by being kind to others around me and trying to keep a positive attitude in the world, even if things are difficult. i believe that i am made to follow my dreams and pursue things that seem impossible. i want to stretch my limits and go beyond what i have ever imagined. i believe that people should be open minded about their lives and encounters even when society tells them otherwise. i also believe that in order to have and maintain a happy life, we must find things that give us joy, through laughter and smiles. this embodies balance in my eyes. we cannot possibly be focused and serious all the time to have an enjoyable life, but instead, we must be focused and disciplined, while having fun, and pursuing what gives us happiness and joy. these root beliefs more specifically stem from my values and aspirations in life. i strongly value hard work, perseverance, dedication, humility, kindness, and leadership. these values are incredibly important for me to know how to grow as my most authentic self. as said by david brooks in david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy? (moreau fye week two) “no virtuous act is quite as virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own standpoint.” meaning, that in our society, too many people live to meet others’ expectations and compare themselves to other people around them. this ultimately does not fulfill their true values in life, and only focuses on living up to the standards of others and their expectations. i believe that in order to grow as my most authentic self, i need to acknowledge my true values and goals in life. this allows me to focus on what i truly want and what values i want to live up to. my life is mine, and it is important to make the most of it. i value each day as an opportunity in life to get better and to be the best version of myself. i strive to improve each day and to work towards my goals that help me see the light at the end of the tunnel, reaching for achievable things that don’t seem so impossible. i am able to go about life knowing what my end goal is and what i would like to work towards. overall, growing as your most authentic self to me is realizing your aspirations and making each day count towards your true values. in addition, growing involves stepping out of your comfort zone. in dr. brown’s commentary (moreau fye weekthe power of vulnerability | brené brown | tedxhouston one), “in order for connection to happen, we have to allow ourselves to be seen. really seen.” people must be uncomfortable in order to grow. being vulnerable often makes people feel https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 uncomfortable being themselves and often criticize their presence and belonging in the world. but, it takes courage to undergo any type of change. one of the sayings i have never forgotten from high school cross country is that “we must all learn to be comfortable being uncomfortable.” being comfortable is a place of familiarity where there is little change. however, once you are willing to step out of your comfort zone, things begin to get harder. so, if we are comfortable being uncomfortable, we are able to rise up to challenges and take on uncomfortable tasks through a lens of excitement rather than intimidation. this allows us to step out of our comfort zones where we think we may belong, to find a new sense of belonging in a more challenging environment. these new ways of learning and thinking have helped me progress in my life and become the best version of myself. being kind to others around me and trying to keep a positive attitude in life can help me in all aspects of my life. this belief creates a positive environment and an optimistic view of the world which is extremely important to staying adverse through difficult times. this can also help me forge strong life-long relationships. positivity is the stem to forging strong relationships, where “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there.” ("5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship" (olivia t. taylor, grotto) (moreau fye week four)) the results and benefits of a healthy friendship help each person grow and become better. each person is able to feed off of each other's positive energy and help each other stay grounded to become the best version of themself. positivity plays a strong role in this because it shows that each person is there for the other through the bad times, and helps make our world a happier place when there are nice people to help in times of need. being able to interact with people in a positive way is something that is so powerful to improving someone’s mood and overall happiness. sometimes if i’m stressed or something, a positive gesture by someone showing that they care or asking about my day can completely change my mood. these kinds of relationships come from a strong foundation based on trust, similar interests, and companionship. being a genuine and kind person to people around you helps foster a strong community. negativity has no place in our world because it simply just makes people feel bad. there is no point in making people feel down or mad if we are all trying to coexist in this environment and give it everything we have to offer. there is truly room for everyone in our environment and everyone to bring their own strengths to our world. i believe that everyone should be open minded in all situations regardless of perceived notions. this can help break down barriers in our society and help bring our world together. being open minded can help us view other perspectives and see the world from a multitude of points of views. as done in the identifying influences week (six), everyone has different roots and identifies from different experiences and areas. these shape our identity and where we feel we belong and where we are from. in fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842 (pages 1-6) (moreau fye week five), one of the men wrote, “i am still young, i shall learn their https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view language in a long time; in a year i hope to be able to understand them,” showing his initiation to try something new and step out of his comfort zone. embedding yourself into another’s culture is powerful to be able to see how they view the world. when these people are able to go to another person’s culture and experience it, it makes them see life in a completely different way. they are able to expand their horizons and learn something new. stories from other people can be powerful to help people expand their imagination to possibilities and things that may seem impossible. hearing stories can also help people find new ways to do things and can help people enjoy things they’ve never done before. being open minded in the world can also help us pursue truth. normally things may not be as they seem because of a truth represented by society that may not be accurate. being open minded is about making sure that you are giving others room to shine. “an individual may be dumb, rauch notes, but the whole network is brilliant, so long as everybody in it adheres to certain rules: no one gets the final say (every proposition might be wrong). no claim to personal authority (who you are doesn’t determine the truth of what you say, the evidence does). no retreat to safety (you can’t ban an idea just because it makes you feel unsafe).” (“how to destroy truth” (david brooks, ny times) (moreau fye week seven)) there are underlying messages in everything that many people may not see or may not know about. pursuing the truth means looking beyond what society typically thinks and looking beyond things like stereotypes and discrimination to see the world without it. in order for people to truly uncover the truth, they must be open minded and okay with the fact that there is not one dominant force who is always right. just because someone may seem to present themselves a certain way or look a certain way, does not determine the value of their information or insight they bring. pursuing truth is difficult in our society with all of the stereotypes and perceived thoughts that our society has built. many people hold certain people to higher standards based on things that are materialistic like race or gender. these can limit the truth behind their true potential. the only real way to uncover the truth is to break down the perceived notions in our heads and to see past any type of initial thought our brains go to that make someone seem a certain way. being open minded is the key to experiencing the world in its purest form where the possibilities are endless. i believe that balance is a powerful way to happiness in our lives. doing things we enjoy are crucial to enjoying the things we do. when doing something difficult, it is crucial that it is also something we want to be doing because otherwise, it will be a lot more difficult to continue and finish. everyone has their own ways of looking at balance and has their own form of balance in their life. for me, balance is within my sports and my life. i believe that sports are all a process and that greatness takes time, so the important part is to keep showing up every day, and do the best i can each day. this also means not comparing myself to others, but also focusing on the little steps forward and building little bricks every day to one day build a house with a strong foundation and sturdy walls. balance is about having those times where i am working hard, and going all in, while also knowing that i can crack a joke at any moment and still laugh, not having to be completely serious all the time. having a group of friends around me helps keep that https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare balance because i am able to relax and unwind when i need to. keeping things constantly at full speed can make things seem harder than they really are, and more difficult to manage. when there is balance, i am able to make sure that more than one aspect of my life is taken care of. i can focus on my goals, but also realize to not be so hard on myself all the time, and to give time for other parts of my life. as father pete says in, “the role of faith in our story” (fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c.) (moreau fye week three), “each faith journey is unique. as you try to sort things out, resist the temptation to compare yourself against what others profess to know and believe. to the degree you can, find ways to remind yourself that your journey is in the loving and sure hands of god.” everyone has their own form of balance and elements that help them pursue balance. one of those can be including faith into their lives. each faith journey is unique and everyone may get different things out of their different relationships with faith. everyone has a unique life and always has a place to rely on faith in the process. whether relying on faith or not, that sense of hope and patience helps everyone get through the tough times and can be a tool to help guide them further and keep a sense of balance in their life. overall, beliefs help shape why people do what they do and what their intentions are for their lives. having strong beliefs and values can help people stay on track and find worth in their everyday pursuits. i believe that my dreams are attainable and that there are no limits to what i can accomplish. i also believe that open-mindedness is incredibly important to seeing all perspectives of life and creating new opportunities. being open-minded can break down barriers and pursue truth in our world. lastly, staying positive in our lives is important to bring the world closer together, and is important to individual health. finding things that give us joy and keep us happy are key to helping us enjoy our lives while pursuing our goals. all of these beliefs are important to me and help shape my life and how i see the world. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry 29 april 2022 a statement to guide my life i aspire to live a life prioritizing family. i want to always recognize the admiration and appreciation i have for them and not allow myself to ever forget this. i want to live a life with professional success, but not consumed by it. it is important to me to accomplish great things, but it must not come at the sacrifice of my well-being. recognizing the importance of a strong support system, i will push myself to prioritize forming and maintaining quality relationships not just among family, but also with friends. through college, the friends i have made have been influential in allowing me to succeed and this is something that i want to carry on throughout my entire life. looking at the bigger picture, i want to give back to not only the community i came from, but also the one i will call home later in life. forming deep connections with those around you develops a greater sense of home and community that can be powerful in overcoming any adversity (“writing my own mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). i believe that in pursuing a life well-lived, a mission statement can be a powerful tool that allows us to remain focused on the most important aspects for you individually. everybody will naturally have different priorities and therefore a different mission statement. when developing my mission statement, i took both a retrospective and prospective approach. i analyzed what historically in my life gave me satisfaction and happiness, then analyzed not only how to maintain these, but also how to grow them, very similar to how the “pause for reflection activity” (“pause for reflection activity” by the mcdonald center for wellbeing moreau fye week one) had us analyze our first semester of college. while reflecting and recognizing what was important to me personally, it was helpful to remember that our time here on earth is limited, and as a result, we should dedicate our time to what we are truly passionate about. i learned this technique from the week three materials when we were reminded, as grim as it sounds, “remember your death” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). however, as important as it is to reflect on your personal life, there is also value in analyzing how other inspirational figures have lived theirs. for example, fr. hesburgh. these influential figures can serve as role models and show us examples of what it truly means to live a life well-lived (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). after a thorough reflection, i believe i was able to craft a mission statement that contained the most valuable aspects of life, at least for me personally. the first thing mentioned in my mission statement, intentionally, is the importance of family and maintaining strong connections with them. however, this is not supposed to be an exclusive statement for everyone else. rather, i want to also build strong connections throughout my community. this idea was reflected by pope francis when he said, “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conference moreau fye week seven). this idea is something that although not specifically stated in my mission statement, i believe is integral to living a life well-lived. another aspect of my mission statement touched on my career discernment process and finding the balance between becoming successful, but not letting my professional aspirations dominate all our other aspects of my life. one tool that was helpful in narrowing down which careers would compliment me was the conversation discernment activity (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau fye week five). in this conversation, i was able to obtain an outside perspective on my strengths, weaknesses, and behavior, and use this information to thoroughly assess a career path which would fit my unique profile. this is further reinforced by text the career center released. “he contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills'' (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this concept was integral in allowing me to develop a mission that offered a path of success for me. the third main point that my mission statement contains is making sure to give back to not only the communities i come from, but also recognize that there are others who are in need of help as well. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). while i have been at notre dame, i have realized that there are nearly an infinite number of worthy causes. for example, “our goal will be to provide notre dame lawyers for every community in this country to stand vigilant against violations of civil and human rights, wherever those threats might arise” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). missions such as these have inspired me to challenge myself to alway work on becoming a more inclusive and generous human being. “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the universoty of notre dame moreau fye week ten). holding these values will help ensure that the core foundations of my mission statement are built upon moral and sound motivations. as i have set goals for myself through this mission statement, it gives me the opportunity to reflect on how i have changed. looking at my first integration, i used to stress the importance of giving back less (“integration 3” by moreau fye week eight). in order to achieve these goals, however, i have to work harder and adopt new methods. one tool that i have picked up is meditation. i have started to use apps such as headspace after i was informed of them through the “ways to practice mindfulness activity” (“ways to practice mindfulness activity” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six). meditation has allowed me to reflect on and analyze many deep aspects of my life that i previously hadn’t. this has had many overflowing benefits. for instance, my relationships. one aspect of my life that i truly believe i now have the ability to objectively step back and analyze is my friendships. in highschool, i was friends with people i had grown up with, but here at notre dame i have been able to have a greater control over the friendships and relationships i make. i can surround myself with people of varying backgrounds and perspectives to ensure that i become a more well informed, whole person. the benefits of this was preached in the “how to avoid an echochamber video” (by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). overall, through the course of the year, i have greatly expanded my knowledge through various methods, such as self reflection, and my mission statement reflects my future aspirations and where i will attempt to grow. this will undoubtedly aid me in my journey to live a life well-lived. capstone integration april 29, 2022 work + love = a life well lived after 13 weeks of meticulous discussion of a life well-lived, i think i have a solid understanding of what i want my life to look like. as i wrote in my mission statement, “my life well-lived will consist of building strong interpersonal relationships, pursuing a fulfilling career, and being good to other people” (“mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). this is vague on purpose. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). life is big and messy and it is so easy to get caught up in frivolous details that don’t actually mean much in the end. when planning out my life, i will focus on the most important factors that constitute a good life. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i will not be reflective on minute details to the point that it is no longer productive, like the quote discusses. when i think about goals, the first thing that comes to mind is educational and career goals. “we also view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). i have chosen to major in political science and peace studies during my four years at notre dame. i have been told numerous times that i should be a stem major if i want to be successful post-graduation. i don’t care that much about the money. one of the domer dozen from week 2 was a political science student who used her degree as part of her journey to reforming the education system to be more equitable. (notre dame alumni association’s domer dozen moreau fye week 2). a career like this seems much more fulfilling than selling out to make money in finance or tech. i worked with my hometown’s local government in high school and loved it. i think that eventually i will work with the local government again in the future. “on the left, there's been this long history of particularly the kind of the well-educated wing of the democratic party pooh-poohing what's happening at the state and local levels nah, all the interesting stuff's got to be the national stuff.” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh moreau fye week 11). local government has the most direct impact on people’s daily lives and above all, no matter what my career entails, i want to help people. with my catholic faith, i want to benefit people in order to uphold the dignity of every person and grow in community with others. “our mission is the lord’s and so is the strength for it. we turn to him in prayer that he will clasp us more firmly to himself and use our hands and wits to do the work that only he can do. then our work itself becomes a prayer: a service that speaks to the lord who works through us.” (constitutions of the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). i want to find my work so meaningful that doing it is like a prayer. my life well-lived will rely on positive, meaningful relationships with the people around me. in the last integration, i wrote that love is not only for the people closest to us but needs to be shown to all people (“integration 3” by moreau fye week 8). i do not find it difficult to be loving to my close friends and family. they know me better than i know myself. my friends are able to pinpoint areas where i can improve and are dedicated to helping me be better, a fact that was made clear to me during my week 5 conversation (moreau fye week 5). “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a "you" and themselves as part of an "us." we all need each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i need to be better at recognizing myself in strangers. we are all a part of the human family, so i must love each person as i love my family. “socialized into a deeply internalized sense of superiority and entitlement that we are either not consciously aware of or can never admit to ourselves, we become highly fragile in conversations about race. we experience a challenge to our racial worldview as a challenge to our very identities as good, moral people.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). i will do the work to recognize my biases and shortcomings. i will educate myself on the struggles that others who are less privileged than i am face every day. if i do this work, an ever ongoing process, i will be able to empathize better with others so i can truly show them love and compassion. i really liked the principles of accompaniment we learned in week 9. “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more.” (“teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). building deeper connections through accompaniment will help me pursue my version of a life well-lived because i believe strong interpersonal relationships are the foundation of a good life. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she said. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). memento mori, the mindset sister aletheia promotes, will help me orient my life. when i reach my deathbed, i want to look back on my life and be able to confidently say that i did everything in my power to live my life in the best way possible. i want to be able to look into the eyes of my loved ones and tell them i am proud of how i lived and the relationships i have with them. if i pursue a meaningful career helping others and show love and care for each person i encounter, i will be able to do just that. these goals will be my markers for living my version of a good life. integration two moreau integration two 11/16/2021 the black and white but also the grey this first semester of moreau has brought to light some serious questions and has helped me to think about deeper things such as racism, faith, and friendships. along with the natural progression of the semester, this course has sparked self-exploration and introspection that has shaped my outlook on life in college. throughout these last few months, some things have become more important, and some things have decreased in value for me. the value of the relationships i’ve formed as well as the ones i left back home have become more important. the time i can spend texting my siblings or calling my mom has become something i cherish now that i can’t see them every day. i’ve learned to make an effort to ask my brothers how their sports games went and check in on how my sister is doing not simply out of a feeling of obligation, but because i genuinely want to talk to them. intentionally setting aside time to call friends from back home has been challenging but worth it. even though i’ve made so many amazing friends here, it is refreshing to catch up with the select few who i know truly care about me and have known me for years. at the same time, emery bergmann wrote, “you can’t clone your high school friends.” that week’s moreau class helped me to think about how my college friends are unique and how i value their friendship just as much, if not more, than many of my high school friends. this doesn’t mean necessarily that all of my friendships from back home have decreased in value (though some definitely have), but that i have moved on to a new stage of life where college friendships often do take precedence. i won’t stop investing time and energy into my old friends, but i have the opportunity to build many new friendships while i am here, and that is a beautiful thing. however, there is more to the people in college than just my friend group. as palmer wrote in his article, “the most common connotation of the word “community” in our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap.” it’s been important for me to have the gateway community in general, especially with how tumultuous it has been this year with the housing crisis. i’ve felt heard and understood by all of my classmates but also have really appreciated the support from past gateway cohorts. the community in general has been huge—i know that there are people who i don’t even know who care about me, and that’s something that i hope to be for younger students as well. another thing that has gained importance is the alone time i get to have. i’ve come to cherish the moments alone in my dorm, or time listening to music while on the “holy hike.” these times let me process my emotions clearly and help me to recharge, since otherwise i’m around friends and peers almost constantly. throughout this semester, i’ve learned to be okay with taking time for myself to relax and watch a show on netflix, even if i fear missing out on what others are doing. i’ve learned the importance of setting aside this time to take care of myself so that i can maintain my mental health, stay organized, reduce stress, and relax. during my time here at college, some things have transitioned from “black and white” to more grey—nuanced, complicated, and confusing. one thing that sticks out to me is my relationships with guys. throughout high school, i never had male friends, so it has been a learning experience for me in college where i have a plethora of guy friends. i’m constantly making sure that i’m not sending off the wrong signals or doing anything that might cause issues. additionally, i ended up dating a guy from holy cross for about a month, but things ended abruptly. however, we are still in the same friend group and neither of us wanted to cause any divisions or unnecessary drama. it has become a large grey area in my life as i try to figure out how to act and navigate this odd situation—especially in a small environment like holy cross, where it is virtually impossible to avoid anyone. while my relationship with him used to be black and white before we were friends, things changed quickly once we got to know each other and started dating. then, after we broke up, the grey area has become more pronounced, just in a different way. however, just as kirsten hegelson said in the video about the art of kinstugi, “there is beauty in brokenness.” i’ve come to embrace the emotions i’ve felt and the interactions i’ve had to navigate as a learning experience that has made me grow as a person and taught me more about what i want and need in a future partner. this break has made me stronger and more beautiful in the end, just like the kinstugi hegelson makes. on the other hand, my faith is something that was previously more ambiguous and vague but that now holds more clarity. in the screwtape letters, a line that struck me is “now it may surprise you to learn that in his efforts to get permanent possession of a soul, he relies on the troughs even more than on the peaks.” through all of the struggles i’ve faced throughout this semester, i’ve been able to rely on god to get me through it. my faith has grown because i’ve had to make it my own, without the structure i had relied on at home. i used to be expected to go to both church and youth group at home, but now that i am at college, i have to make more of an effort. i’ve had to build my own schedule and prioritize church because it won’t just come naturally anymore. thanks to this, i’ve realized how much my relationship with jesus really matters to me and how much i need it in this life. throughout the course of this first semester of college, i’ve definitely grown, learned, and changed a lot. while some things have grown more clear to me, others have become more confusing or challenging. thankfully, that is perfectly natural and is a learning experience in and of itself. college is an amazing experience to prepare us for the transition from life at home to life in the real world, and a big part of that is figuring out who we are, what we believe, and what we want out of life. to do that, we must be okay with changing our perspectives on things, people, and experiences, just as i am doing right in this moment. references (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine) (“women find healing through kinstugi workshop” by grotto network moreau fye week ten) (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven) (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week twelve) https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jgjljeqd8gg http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ integration four how i want to live my life in week 8 of moreau first year experience, we were assigned a personal mission statement. i put a lot of time and effort into mine, but i am not truly proud of what i ended up submitting. i felt that while it did encapsulate some of the ways i wished to live my life, it did not truly feel like me. i believe that one of the most difficult things you can do is attempt to lay out, in words, your thoughts on life and how you should live it. i am only 18 years old and as my dad always says, i haven’t even begun to think yet. so for my capstone integration, where i must refine my personal mission statement and articulate how it will guide me in my next three years at notre dame, i have decided to take a different approach. instead of arbitrarily coming up with philosophies on life, i will use what i have learned in moreau fye this past semester as a guide. the first idea that stuck out to me was pico iyer’s statement, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). too often does my life feel like pure chaos. running to class and practice and getting back to my dorm with only the late hours of the night left to do mounds of work. i must remember to take a step back from the noisy canvas at times like this. to step away from the present stress and instead appreciate why i am here, doing what i am doing. i am here not only to get an education, but to grow as a person and be someone i am proud of. i am here to be exposed to opportunities, so that i can leave an impression on the world around me, and live courageously. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ ted hesburg was quoted saying “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering. but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself” (“hesburgh”, produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). i feel very fortunate to say that i do not think i have truly suffered yet. in the eyes of father hesburg, i currently do not truly understand the meaning within suffering. this doesn’t mean, however, that i don’t understand my responsibility to help those who are suffering. i must respond to suffering with feelings of initiative, because “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” – moreau fye week twelve). something i am passionate about is the racial injustice plaguing our world: “the distinction – between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power – is fundamental” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo – moreau fye week ten). issues like this are where the public needs to make the effort to take action: “in real politics, righteous anger and emotion are something you leverage into action” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week eleven). i also understand that in service, i must strive to employ the idea of accompaniment. both sides need to be on board and put effort into the relationship. this is how the lines become blurred between partners so instead of one leading the other, the two can walk together. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). what is looming over my college experience, is the question of what comes next. it is comforting to hear then, that “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps dont take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing between stages as you learn and grow” (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). it can be easy to feel like i will soon be set in my one life path that i will either fail or succeed at. i must continue to remind myself that my path must be my own. if i deviate off my path for something more fulfilling, this does not mean that i failed. i want to make choices that will challenge me and contribute to a satisfying life. i am truly happy when in the presence of people. it has become more and more clear to me, at this point in my life, that i thrive off of human connection. living a good life involves surrounding yourself with others, having meaningful interactions and encounters that fill us up with belonging. i don’t exactly relate to father greg boyle’s statement, “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (tattoos on the heart, by father greg boyle). i feel fortunate that i don’t have many barriers built up, but in the same way, i must be careful not to get hurt. when i had a conversation with my roommate for moreau fye week 5, her answer to the question “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” was something that i had been contemplating for a while now – she told me that i don’t have to give my time and effort to everyone because not everyone deserves it. while i thrive off of human connection, it is important for me to be conscious of the fact that not everyone will build me up. some relationships are draining, and i do not need to entertain them when i have people around me that improve my quality of life tremendously. another complication of my dependence on those around me is that i have found myself beginning to decline when i am alone. i believe that this may relate to introspection. “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action” https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987/download?download_frd=1 (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). it takes concrete effort to practice introspection the right way, and this is something i need to work on. this next quote has given me much needed perspective: “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” from father michael himes – moreau fye week three). happiness is a fragile construct of time and place, while joy can be something constant, inspiring me from behind possible negativity. it is comforting to know this. i must not beat myself up when i am struggling to be happy, and instead recognize that the joy within me will ultimately guide me to prosperity. the joy within me will allow me to take a step back from my canvas of life, to be of service to the world around me, to develop a unique path for me life, and to nurture relationships that build me up. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567/download?download_frd=1 integration three living a life well-lived involves finding your passions and what makes you happy and focusing on that. discerning your passions is a very difficult process. our interests are constantly changing and evolving, which makes it challenging to find a passion that we don’t grow out of in a few short months or years. however, it is important for us to remember that it is totally normal and okay to have changing interests. one of the most difficult parts of college for many is deciding on just one thing to study. something to keep in mind is the fact that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life.” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). after college, we are not obligated to stick with our major, and we can continue to explore different things. this is what defines a life well lived. we should follow our interests, and find our passions, even if they are frequently changing. living a life bound to one job or field of study is not made for everyone, therefore we should do what truly makes us happy in order to live a fulfilling life. in addition to finding personal fulfillment, living a life well lived also involves discerning your social passions and helping others. the world is filled with injustice, and we should all add meaning to our lives by combatting this injustice. there are so many issues in the world, and we, as individuals, likely do not have the time to focus on every single issue. i think it is important to pick a few issues that you are passionate about and focus on how you can help to solve them. for example, when i talked to my mom for the week 5 interview, she said that she believed that equality for everyone regardless of their race, gender, ethnicity, sexual orientation, etc is something that is important to me (moreau fye week 5). i agree with her, and i try to focus a lot on equality. i read a lot about racism in america and additionally about gender equality issues, especially in the workforce. by doing this, i am educating myself on these topics, which will allow me to be conscious of these issues in our society and constantly be thinking about ways that i can try to prevent these issues in the future. the concept of finding social justice passions is something that was emphasized in the movie about father hesburgh. father hesburgh had many passions and did a lot for society while he was the president of notre dame. to describe father hesburgh in just a few words would be a difficult task, however one way to describe him is “someone who was totally committed to his country, his faith, and to what was right” ("hesburgh" moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh found what he was passionate about and tried to do what was right for society by fighting injustices. after all, pope francis emphasized the importance of social justice in our world today, saying “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone. we don’t think about it often, but everything is connected, and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week 7). because the world is so interconnected, we cannot have certain minority groups facing injustice without it having repercussions on everyone else. the issues of social injustice are issues that affect us all, which is why it is so important that people take action. making the world a better, more equal, and more https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145505 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript inclusive place will benefit everyone and bring fulfillment to all, which is why it is such a critical element of a life well lived. lastly, in order to live a life well lived, we must take moments to pause and reflect, as opposed to letting our lives pass us by. when good things happen to us in life, we must appreciate them, and think about them often. however, likewise when bad things happen, we should also think about them. when we are faced with difficult times, it is important to reflect on those times, however we must do so in a healthy way. we should always ask ourselves “what” instead of “why”. oftentimes asking ourselves the wrong thing through introspection can make us more upset, as is demonstrated in week 6 when it says, “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich phdmoreau fye week 6). instead of hyper focusing on our negative emotions, we should focus on how life will get better and how we will grow from difficult times. likewise, when good things happen to us we must reflect on them to fully appreciate them. the overall importance of reflection is emphasized in week 1 when it says “the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). not only does reflection allow you to have greater appreciation for your experiences, it gives you a sense of purpose moving forward. through reflection, you can understand what is truly important to you, allowing you to focus on that moving forward. our lives are short, and finding out what we value is an important part of living a life well. as we reflect, it is important for us to remember that we do not have infinite time on our planet. this idea is exemplified through the “concept [of] intentionally [thinking] about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). through self-reflection and remembering that our time on earth is short, we can realize what we truly value in life, and pursue those values in order to have a life well lived. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145607 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145607 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145485 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html integration 1 anderson 1 david pruitt moreau fys-10101-78 15 october 2021 (n)ew (d)evelopments belief is something that is hard-won and often changing. it is built both on experience and learning new things about others. college is a time that beliefs are either further solidified or even turned on their heads entirely, especially in the first semester. every freshman is in an entirely new situation, whether it be physically, academically, mentally, or emotionally. new experiences force critical thinking and the development of new belief systems. as a university that focuses on the development of the mind in a healthy way, not just academically, notre dame definitely has that effect. total self-realization within the first several weeks of classes is not expected, or even totally possible. however, i have still developed new beliefs and become stronger in others. i believe that i have been shaped by strength, i grow by connection, and i am made to help others. i believe that i have been shaped by strength. as a child, i was shaped by stories, much like chimamanda ngozi adichie (the danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7). i saw myself represented in stories with strong female characters. i looked up to them and wanted to be exactly like the characters on the page. as a result, i worked hard to become the best version of myself. however, i am not just shaped by people that do not exist. i have been extremely lucky that all of my community has stood behind me every step of the way, but especially my mother. when i first read george ella’s “i am from” poem, my first thought was the strength of my mother (i am from poem by george ella moreau fye week https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html anderson 2 6). she has shaped me by showing me what it means to be strong. my mother has taught me that i can hold my ground and be vulnerable at the same time. in fact, she has highlighted how vital vulnerability with other people is for growth throughout my life, especially in regards to connection. i did not fully understand the extent of her words until i arrived at notre dame, but now it is one of my root beliefs. i believe that i grow from connection. this belief was, admittedly, a surprise to me when i came to notre dame. i have always been extremely self-sufficient and introverted. i never thought that i would need connections as much as i do for my growth. however, in admitting this truth to myself, i leaned on brené brown’s words about vulnerability ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week one). her successes paired with her need to be vulnerable has opened a door that i previously thought was closed. now, i know that, in order for me to grow as a person, i must be able to be vulnerable. when i was feeling extremely homesick at the beginning of the semester, i remembered the importance of vulnerability and human connections, so i reached out for help from my parents. now we call each other at least once a week. this connection with them has been invaluable. when i caught a bad cold, i was able to let people know that i was not doing well, allowing for more genuine connections than if i decided to pretend everything was perfect. in essence, making connections has helped and will continue to help grow my strengths and diminish my weaknesses. david brooks highlights the importance of qualities that will make someone’s eulogy ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy" by david brooks moreau fye week 2). these qualities, kindness, bravery, wisdom, and the like, are the strengths that forge connections. without these characteristics and the connections that come from them, human growth is not possible. human connections can also help grow my quest for self-discovery, something father pete mccormick, c.s.c. calls https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim anderson 3 “the greatest journey you will ever go on” ("the role of faith in our story" by father pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3). some of the most important aspects of self discovery come from having to be vulnerable in a new place, like college. the connections made in the moments of vulnerability, whether it be in class, within a residential hall, in a club, on a team, or more, are what lead to the discovery of one’s true self. i now know that i need to find the courage to be vulnerable enough to make connections to others in order to make discoveries about myself. only then can i fulfill what i was made to do. i believe that i was made to help others. like father sorin’s hope for notre dame articulated in his letter to father moreau, i have a hope for myself to be a means of spreading good in the community ("letter to bl. basil moreau '' by father sorin moreau fye week 5). i wish to address the systemic issues in society in a positive, transformative way. i know that the things i am learning at notre dame will help me in my endeavors. for example, some of my classes this semester study the structures in our society that are detrimental to our most vulnerable citizens. i have learned methods on how to best combat those issues in ways that promote the safety of the maximum number of people, whether that be conflict transformation or the study of strategic and principled nonviolence. i also truly believe that we are our brothers’ and sisters’ keepers ("it's on us nd3 ds of being an active bystander" by notre dame moreau fye week 4). however, this requires active listening. it is our job, as a community, to make sure that we take care of each other. when we agree to live in a society, it is our responsibility to look out for the weakest people in our community. this takes skills that cannot necessarily be taught in a classroom through readings and essays. one must learn to listen to others in order to maximize one’s ability to help in their plight. i hope to get as close as possible https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view anderson 4 to perfecting the art of actively listening and learning. then, i can fulfill my role as an ally to oppressed people in our society. in my time at notre dame, i have learned or affirmed that i believe that i have been shaped by strength, i grow by connection, and i am made to help others. the strength of others around me, physically and otherwise, has made me into the person i am today. the need for connection, a relatively new revelation, is vital for my growth as a person. i have affirmed that i believe that my purpose in life is to help as many people as i can. in order to do this, i must listen to others and apply the knowledge i have learned at notre dame to real world situations. i am sure that i will learn even more about my beliefs, not only in the next semester and a half, but the next four years of my college experience. the most important thing is that i continue to think critically about new information being presented and take the time to reflect on those ideals before i decide what i believe to be true. only then can new developments truly take place. capstone moreau.pdf 1 father kevin moreau capstone assignment april 14, 2022 as i have come to settle into notre dame, the second semester has allowed me to accept this new way of life and not take it for granted. during the first semester, despite the excitement of such new experiences, getting used to life alone was extremely difficult and i wanted nothing more than to be home surrounded by my family and friends. getting adjusted to the workload and building new time management skills took the entire semester to figure out. i started having doubts about whether this school was the right fit for me and whether i would be able to ever feel like i belonged here. during christmas break, i wasn’t sure anymore i wanted to be a doctor. it wasn’t until coming back for the second semester that i really made school my only priority and worked harder than i ever had. while i still need to work harder, i made improvement from the beginning of the year and am sure i am taking the pre-med track for my career. instead of feeling dissatisfied and disappointed with ourselves, we can take our hardships and turn them into opportunities for learning. dr. kim’s video proves that over-analyzing a situation will only bring us more suffering and dissatisfaction with the state of our lives. we usually tend to focus on the negative when we are doing reflection because it is the easiest thing to focus on. we sometimes think that our conditions are so bad but others wish they could have what we do . this also connects to what eurich states, “asking “why?” in one study appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward” (week 6 eurich). 2 when thinking about what i want for my future and career, i know what i want to do but i know that it is possible for my plan to change. i want to become more involved in different activities and research opportunities to see if i find my abilities are better suited for them. father michael himes helped me to narrow down my real passions and goals that i want my future to entail. his three questions revolve around doing something in the future that is not only going to benefit the world, but is also going to benefit you in the long run (week 3 himes). the first question really resonated with me in that i want to pursue a career that i know i will truly enjoy and want to do because i want to do it myself not because it is a “successful” career or because someone else expects me to. while hard, i really enjoy the classes that i am taking and know i am benefitting from the work i do. in terms of the second question, i had to ask myself if i can approach the career that i am pursuing, pre-med in neuroscience, an environment where i can thrive in. hime describes this as genuine humble openness to other people’s direction and i believe that this is the only career i can see myself in. i want to positively impact others in the medical field the same way that i was helped, which answers this third question that has pursued me. complaining about the hardships of having to move away from home and to live on your own will never get one anywhere. instead, we need to be optimistic and realize the opportunities that lie before us. being able to attend notre dame and get this high-level education has filled me with gratitude for the chances this university has given me. father hesburgh was able to pass on the great morals he carried and the way he changed life all around him. his film allowed me 3 to see education for what it truly is: “i believed education had to have morals, but there had to be a way to balance faith and academics” (week 2 hesburgh film). father hesburgh allowed me to see that having this education is not only a chance to do something great in the future, a hope of transcendence. it is also an opportunity to grow right now, every day, as we interact with one another and get through the hardest assignments that seem so tedious. i also learned the importance of mentors throughout my journey, not only here at notre dame but throughout life. this mentoring comes from a palace of a “kind of tough love” as sharon daloz parks calls it (week 4 parks). as reifenberg talks about, through support, guidance, and challenge, mentors are able to inspire us as students to desire the feeling for change of others and within oneself. “there’s an element of mystery, of openness, of trust, in accompaniment” where the companion says “i’ll share your fate for a while” (week 10 reifenberg 4). mentors are also crucial in teaching us how to work with one another when divisions turn up. this problem can be seen as mary shelley’s modern frankenstein conflict where individuals have become so divided over their beliefs. religion and politics are some of the topics that have created the most tension over the past years and leaders are needed to settle arguments (week 5 frankeinstein). our contradicting beliefs have led us to become aggressive and even violent towards one another. as pope francis mentioned, the main hope for this issue is remembering that we need each other because everything is ultimately connected. through the implementation of solidarity in all aspects of life, not just professionally, is the main way to put people first instead of products. it seems to be that much of this conflict comes from fighting for what benefits one in such of the cases mentioned above, many having to do with wealth and products. but what if caring for the wellbeing of others came first? perhaps many of us would 4 start to shift our beliefs towards more similar things. as pope francis said, love is the meaning and source of life, and that can only be achieved through one another (week 5 pope francis). with love and the experiences of this year, i am excited to see how i implement this into my future years here at notre dame and into the future. 5 integration 1 professor pruitt moreau integration 1 13 october 2021 becoming who i am meant to be i believe that i am imperfect. i was created to be exactly who i am, not an idealized, perfect version of myself. throughout my life i have struggled with believing this idea more than anything else. for as long as i can remember, i have consistently placed extremely high standards on myself, ones that i could not imagine anyone else having to face. when i did not meet these standards i was faced with disappointment and had no room for forgiveness. i was never content with who i was as a person and accepting that i was imperfect never occurred to me as an option. however, as i grew older i realixed that this toxic mindset would never be sustainable and looking at myself in such a negative mindset would not make me a more “perfect” person. as brené brown says. “they had the courage to be imperfect.” ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fys week one). this lesson was tough to learn because in my head it seemed weak to recognize my imperfections. however, it is quite the opposite. i am not only a happier person but a stronger one too now that i know that perfection is not necessary nor attainable. this was not something that changed in me overnight, but a constant struggle that i face on a daily basis. but as i have mentioned, i have become a stronger person because of it. the quote “out of that wrestling, that suffering, a depth of character is constructed” ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fys week 2) is one that has stuck with me from this course. in the moments where i have found myself struggling with the ideas of perfectionism, are the moments when i grow most as a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim person. here at notre dame, i have to constantly remind myself of these ideas. when it can feel easy to give up or feel not good enough, it is crutial that i remember that my imperfections are not weaknesses and do not define me. i believe that i am growing. i am an unfisinshed person and just because i have made it here does not mean that i have become all that i am meant to be. this belief goes hand in hand with the previous one. just as through my struggle with perfection i realized that there is no need for be to always be perfect, in the same way i am growing through that. there is no need for me to have all the answers, rather i can hold onto the hope that my future will work out the way it is meant to be. this idea is summed up perfectly in the quote “hope is confident because it rests upon god’s power, not our own.” ("faith brings light to a dark world" by professor david fagerberg moreau fys week three) my faith has always been something that has been a central aspect of my life and i think this quote is so important. i am growing into the person god has meant for me to be and it is inevitable that i will make mistakes on the way. however, by adapting a hopeful mindset i am able to place my trust in god that everything will work out the way it is meant to be. by doing this i am able to focus on all the good things going on in my life rather than being dragged down by a fear of what the future holds for me. another aspect of my growth as a person deals with the idea that i am on a search for my purpose just like figuring out my plan for my life, i still am not completely certain on what i am meant to do and how that relates to me purpose. in carla harris graduate address she addresses this issue saying, “your ability… to find and fulfill your purpose lies in your ability to adjust your focus to sharpen your vision on the good and great things that are right in front of you” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fys week 5) by focusing on what is right in front of me rather than the worries or fears i have for the future will allow me to seek out this purpose in life https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 better than anything else. during my time in college, taking on this mindset will not only help me discover what the next steps in my life will look like, but will also help me have a happier and more positive experience. i believe i am shaped by those around me. reflecting back on my life, my values, and the things that make me who i am, i have recognized that many of these core characteristics are from the people most important to me. my parents have always been people i look up to, and i think that i have incorporated many of their characteristics into my life. when i wrote my “where i’m from” poem ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six) i recognized that i learned to be hardworking from my dad and selfless from my mom. while these are just small examples of the way i have been influenced, i know there are so many more examples of how my family has influenced me. in the same way, i believe that i will be influenced by all the positive people i am surrounded by here at notre dame. in the short time that i have been here i have already found myself attempting to adapt some of the admirable characteristics of my friends into my life. i know that the people i surround myself play a large role in who i am as a person, and it is important that i find those who will help me become the best version of myself. at the same time, i believe that i have the power to create my own beliefs and am not defined by those around me. while the influences in my life are extremely important to me, i also recognize that i am not bound to them. if there is something that i do not agree with, i have the power to choose what i want to believe. i learned this lesson the hard way in middle school. when i was younger i was very much influenced by my friends. i liked whatever they liked and did almost everything they did. while that seems like a normal middle school friendship, what made it toxic for me was the way they treated others. they began by refusing to sit with the girls in my class at lunch and later completely excluding most of the girls, even one of my best http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html friends. they were completely unreceptive to my concern for their actions and refused to change their ways. my friends had created a stereotype of all the girls in my class in that they were “weird” and unworthy of spending time with. the way they saw others was similar to the quote by chimamanda ngozi adichie, “stereotypes make one story become the only story” ("danger of a single story" by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) they became so hyper focused on the way they saw the other girls that it affected their actions and later the way others perceived them, in a negative way. i had to make the decision to leave this friendship due to the way our morals did not align. i was unwilling to allow the way they treated others to become a part of who i was as a person. just as much as my friends now make a positive impact on me, it is important to remember that i do not have to always be defined by those around me. i believe that i am meant to show love to those around me. just as much as the people in my life have influenced me, i know that i have just as much on an impact on the lives of other whether i realize it or not. in order that i have a positive impact on the people i encounter, i believe it is important that i consistently show an attitude of love. i have learned this lesson and have been able to adapt it into my own life through the example of one of my best friends. my friend is one of the most selfless people i know and she is always looking for ways to help others in anyway that she can. to me, she is the perfect example of what showing love to others looks life. through her example i have learned that there are so many ways i can show love to others: sending a quick text before a test, giving someone a hug when it looks like they are having a bad day, or encouraging those around me. like we talked about in week four, it is important that the way i treat others, especially those closest to me is always in the best interest of the other person. as olivia taylor wrote, “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people.” ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ by olivia t taylor moreau fys week four). the way i treat others should be with the intention of helping them become the best version of themselves. here during my time at notre dame i know i will be surrounded by people who will be some of my closest friends. keeping the idea of always showing love to them is crucial to forming these life-giving relationships. reflecting back on my life as well as the new chapter in my life here at notre dame, recognzing these important beliefs i have will help me grow into the best version of myself. i believe that i am imperfect. i believe that i am growing. i believe i am shaped by those around me. i believe that i am called to show love to those around me. s2week 15 integration 4! prof. pruitt moreau first year experience april 29, 2022 the good life. “many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve. while such concerns must be taken very seriously, they are not invincible. they can be overcome when we don't lock our door to the outside world. happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component. even science – and you know it better than i do – points to an understanding of reality as a place where every element connects and interacts with everything else”pope francis. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). 9 months, gone just like that. whether a good or bad thing, the clueless freshman i once was is gone. i’m about to be a sophomore, about to be 20 years old, about to look for a real job. things are getting real. however, i’m not too worried. yes, there’s a constant pressure on me to reach my goals and to succeed in all i do partially by me and partially by my surrounding community but that doesn’t mean my life is controlled by that. i’ve always been an individual who seeks to embrace optimism in everyday life, and after a year at notre dame i would say i believe in that value even more than before. “the good life” is a phrase i’d never heard before coming here, but one that i now here everywhere i go. it’s an open ended concept that varies person to person, but the sentiment is constant: the good life is a life well lived. after hearing from doctors and professors about this exact subject all year, encountering countless sources by experts on the topic, and taking time to reflect on how it relates to my own life, i think that i am well-equipped to explain my version of “the good life” at this very moment. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript kositzke it’s important to start by acknowledging the obvious. “to us, death is exotic, but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place”joanna ebenstein. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). we are here for a limited time, we could lose everything at any moment. it sucks, but it’s the truth. but, that doesn’t mean we have to give up hope and wallow in pity for this fact, rather the opposite. we must live intentionally and maximize every second we are granted on this earth. the first step to the good life is a realization of our finite existence and a commitment to living a full life. another crucial step to the good life we must take right away revolves around a particular word: authenticity. living an ingenuine existence is conducive to so many negative effects in a variety of ways. people spread lies in efforts to earn the respect or love of others, but it always ends with them feeling discontent or further detached. even when we think about most politicians, it’s observable that “they're there to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. they're not trying to move anyone. they're not trying to empower anything. they're really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way.” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh moreau fye week 11). there’s a legitimate philosophical term i learned that year which sums this all up: bullshit. while attractive on the surface level, a life filled with lies and fake interactions is a life filled with bullshit. we have to be mature and elevate ourselves to a more thoughtful and intentional way of living. the modern world is divided. it’s not all because of this one problem, but it is certainly a leading cause. leaders have to be honest and real to those they engage with, for both the betterment of themselves but also the betterment of their larger community. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?login=email&auth=login-email https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?login=email&auth=login-email https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ kositzke an honest life leads to learning. there are countless testimonies about how possessing an open mind and being transparent changes people and causes significant growth. one article from this year describes a man’s volunteer efforts: “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well”steve reifenberg. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). you never know what you don’t know… that may sound like nonsense but trust me, it is a valuable sentiment to have. it aligns with the concept of socratic ignorance, an assumption that there is always more to be learned. there’s nothing but pride to be gained from thinking you know it all, so don’t. instead, engage with others and seek to growyourself, the others, and everyone else. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). with the notions of living every moment and living a genuine life in mind, we can begin to explore other facets of what makes the good life. take, for example, unfamiliar encounters. though we are inclined to stay in a comfort zone every minute of our lives, i think we all know that’s simply not an option. historical and modern events alike display the severe need for understanding both our communities but also communities different than our own. “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles”dean g. marcus cole. (“i am george floyd…” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). there is everything to gain from embracing others. these encounters stimulate growth and togetherness… sounds like the good life to me. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ kositzke with an understanding of our differences from others also comes a more open stigma around how we conduct ourselves with the unfamiliar. “socialized into a deeply internalized sense of superiority and entitlement that we are either not consciously aware of or can never admit to ourselves, we become highly fragile in conversations about race.”robin diangelo. (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). we have to look inside ourselves and see the biases held, the natural assumptions, and all of the prejudices built into who we are. it’s essential in joining together with others. on the note of reflection of oneself comes another key revelation. there is power in reviewing our past and setting goals for the future, but there is also a rabbit hole that we can easily fall deep into. “introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). sure, there is much value to be gained from examining our own actions, but we can’t forget about the value of living in the moment. we have to stay present in everything we do. think about the advice of credible moreau authors: “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). be intentional, be present, and be aware. one other key we must acknowledge is our peers. our community. our own world. influences mold the people we are and the people we become, and as such it’s crucial to surround yourself with people who push you to be the best version of yourself, who motivate and inspire you. attending an institution with ties all over the world, we see many examples of these people, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ kositzke like the fr. hesburgh documentary shown to all first-years (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). this is a great start, but we must also hold ourselves accountable to encounter people. they’re not always gonna be presented right to us. whether through linkedin, irish compass, or a chance meeting in person, each and every connection that we make builds us into a more complex and mature individual (moreau fye week 5). the good life is an abstract concept, and because of that this essay hops from topic to topic with every paragraph. but that’s the point! we should live a life of diverse perspectives and practiceswe can’t be tied to one single way of thinking. if you asked me a year ago, i would have given you a vastly different definition of “the good life”, and if you asked me in a year i’m sure it would be equally unique. there’s no one right answer. rather, there’s an endless collection of them. with every right answer we find, we take a step closer to living a genuinely good life, and isn’t that the goal? i’ll leave you with a succinct statement of where i place my beliefs at this point and time. it’s probably already changed by the time you read this, but it’s a starting point. here’s to improving ourselves and others, one step at a time. to collaborate with others and use my life experiences in a manner that promotes happiness and motivation in the community and those around me. i live a life which centers around relationships, passions, and a dedication to maximize every second. with these goals in mind comes my core belief to seize any opportunity i face. we only have so much time and nothing is guaranteed—it is essential to seek out opportunities and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 kositzke to act in a manner which spreads goodwill around our world. i have been fortunate enough to be presented with the resources that allow me a platform to reach a broader community, which is something that i absolutely cannot take for granted. regardless of the situation which i find myself in, i have an obligation to reach the goals i set for myself. with such a lifestyle, i should grow in wisdom and courage and gain an understanding of how i can address problems which surround both the lives of myself and others. i pride myself on being an individual who is caring with others and can find the positives of any circumstance i face. my diverse education and supportive community act as a driving force which allows me to continue growth and mold into a leader. a life well lived is one of happiness and collaboration, which means they are traits which i seek to embody as i traverse through life. whether consciously or unconsciously, this is my mission and i have a duty to follow it. anderson integration three final anderson 1 dr. chan moreau fye 3/4/22 integration three: may i rest in peace we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of . though we are grieved, she would want us to come together and share tears and laugh through stories about her character and our mutual experience of having her in our life. in the wise words of sister aletheia, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (sister aletheia moreau fye week three). this death was a shock to us all, but it calls us to remember our final end. no one is meant to stay on earth. our true home is in heaven. annaliese would want us to remember that. even here, we can see that in this tragedy there is also beauty. we would not be experiencing such deep sorrow and pain if we did not have such deep love for her. and we should all be grateful that we had a relationship with such value and love in it. we can still benefit from that relationship. no one can take it away from us. though annaliese is no longer with us, the memory of her lives on. if we are in a situation, we can still think, “what would annaliese do?” and an image of her will come to us. in fact, she would probably be very flattered by that. she always loved to give advice and would be honored if her memory could continue this mission. so, let us use this death as a chance to meditate on our own life and inevitable death. are we the people we want to be? if we died today, suddenly, just like annaliese did, would we be ready? would someone describe our life as well-lived? annaliese loved practicing self-reflection. one of her favorite stories to tell went like this: “one day mahatma gandhi was anderson 2 said to have woken up and told those around him, “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.” his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. “i’ll have to meditate for two,” he spelled out (“why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). annaliese believed that self-reflection and knowledge were key to personal growth. she thought that if everyone practiced self-reflection the world would be a better place. she thought it was ironic that when people were busy, the first thing they would give up is this time for reflection (be it spiritual reading, deep conversations with a friend, mass, quiet time alone) when this time could be the very thing they need to reach interior peace. she used to say, “how can people not stand to hear their thoughts? i don't know what i would do without them. i genuinely enjoy just quiet time alone to think”. she had a rich inner life. this is probably why she was not swayed by the pressures of the world. she was known for being brilliant and perfectionistic, but not ambitious. she often wondered why people were so allured by prestige and worldly success. she did well in her studies, but she claimed that this was because of her love of learning and desire to do things well, not her need to check off a rubric and gain a perfect gpa. this struggle was apparent in her when trying to choose a major. many people encouraged her to do law or engineering to be more “successful” but she was not interested in pursuing those subjects. she had no passion for them. she found support in an article from the notre dame center for career development which said, “we view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes. that sounds pretty good, right? i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed maybe it was something a friend or family member wanted you to do or a required course in high school. it’s really hard to motivate yourself to do well if you’re just not https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ anderson 3 interested in that subject matter or activity, or maybe your skill is lacking so it gets frustrating quickly. now imagine focusing primarily on that activity for four years. does that seem appealing?”(ccd moreau fye week four). she believed that true education should enrich your mind and heart and that material success was not as worthy a goal as virtue, wisdom, and character formation. she believed that you should have a passion for what you do. that way it doesn’t even feel like work even if you spend hours and hours doing it. she loved history, literature, film, music, art, psychology, genetics, statistics, creative writing and many other subjects. she loved to just learn without needing a grade. where classmates saw guest speakers as a chance to nap, she saw them as a chance to learn and the best part of the school year. she loved conferences as to her they were a chance to just listen and converse with great minds and absorb what they have to offer. she said that she loved “leisurely learning” and believed that true education was a deeper endeavor than just “schooling”. one of her passions was literature. specifically, the psychology and philosophy of story. she believed that the perspective literature gives the reader allows them to awaken their conscience, deepen their empathy, and gain wisdom about human nature. tattoos on the heart was a book that she found very powerful. it is a collection of stories by a priest describing his experience in running a gang intervention program in the ghettos of la. in one excerpt, he describes a common situation where a boy from one gang would join the program and see a boy from a rival gang as follows: “he thinks a bit and invariably will say; “i'll work with him, but i’m not gonna talk to him”. in the early days, this would unsettle me. until i discovered that it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know”(tattoos on the heart. pg 142 moreau fye week seven). annaliese believed this as well. .she would always say that it is easy to demonize someone when they are reduced to nothing but an impersonal being or statistic in your mind. you can blame them for your anderson 4 problems, villainize them, judge them to your heart’s content. this “depersonalization” allows you to be cruel and unfeeling to them. however, as soon as you begin to learn about them, know their story, and interact with them as a person you begin to empathize with them. you see their humanity and are not as unfeeling towards them. when you get to know a person and their story you see their depth and humanity and are not as likely to take the simple route and “demonize” them. you see their complexity and depth. for example, the previously mentioned boy who at first wouldn’t talk with the other boy was willing to donate his blood to save his life after he had been beaten by gang members. he learned through personal interaction that the other person was not a villain but another human being made in the image and likeness of god. annaliese believed that humans are complex and that generalizations undermine the depth and dignity of each individual. she also believed that fulfilling relationships are based on mutual respect and focused on depth. anyone who knew annaliese knew that she loved the word “depth”. and she would tell you if your commitment to seeking depth did not meet her standards. for example, in college she had to complete a “meaningful conversation discernment activity” for one of her classes. she asked me some questions (which she found to be stilted and claimed that they ironically prevented the conversation from reaching any deep level). one such question was: “can you reflect on a specific episode when you saw me “in the zone,” when i was at my very best? what was i doing? how/why does this episode demonstrate my best self?” (moreau fye week five). for me, “in the zone” meant something that she does well. to her, she focused on the later half of the questions, the “best self” part and interpreted this to be her virtue and character. thus, when i answered that she was an excellent harp player she told me, “no. that’s not deep enough”. i said that she was supposed to record my answer, not reject it, to which she responded with a smirk, “is that all i am to you, a harp player?”. you who knew her well can picture her saying this. her anderson 5 bluntness reminds me of a quote by fr. hesburgh which says, “the most loyal thing one can do is be honest” (fr. hesburgh moreau fye week two). she was only blunt to those she knew best. when meeting strangers she had a demure, warm, and gentle way about her. people would always tell me, “oh that annaliese is the kindest person in the world. she doesn’t have a mean bone in her body!” and i would think, “are we talking about the same annaliese?”. most people never saw the fiery, passionate, defiant, argumentative, brutally honest, witty, sarcastic side of annaliese. but she tempered all of these traits with elegance and a genuine thoughtfulness and investment in those she was closest to. they say that it is the love language of a melancholic. they express their negative emotions only to those that they love most. perhaps that is why she was so interested in the concept of suffering. she would often say that suffering is the only universal human experience. she believes that suffering and failure are inevitable, yet nonetheless overcomable and redeemable. one quote that really resonated with her was as follows: “the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering; suffering is part of our lives; it is always there. it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that's the reason i was able to go through this and trust in god and live with joy and gratitude” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). every single person experiences suffering. we are suffering now in our mourning. however, annaliese firmly believed that this does not dictate that we must be miserable. suffering is overcomable. she would always say that the most important thing is how we respond to suffering and allow it to affect us do we let it make us miserable and bitter or do we let it help us become closer to god? suffering can always be united to christ and it can forge us into better people. that is what she would want us to do now. to channel our pain at her loss into wisdom and love, into a chance to become closer to the others in this room and to our lord jesus christ. annaliese believed that being your best self is https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 anderson 6 more than just when you are “in the zone”. it is more than material accomplishments. it is rooted in interior life and the expression of that interior life through relationships. she always said that she preferred “eulogy” virtues over “resume” virtues. so i hope this eulogy does justice to her expectations. she was truly an example of a life well-lived. week 8 mfyes integration i helm moreau first-year experience 3/5/22 a eulogy and a promise we gather today, friends and family, to honor kathleen, a devoted wife and mother who lived every day with compassion and thank you for being here as we celebrate, rather than mourn, the life of kathleen. kathleen was always so caring as she put the people around her first. she was always willing to do anything for those she loved. … seeing other people’s smiling faces around her showed how she lit up the lives around her. …. kathleen, thank you for lighting up the world with your infectious smile, boundless joy, and unwavering love. we will miss you so much and can’t imagine a life without your light. my reflection and promise : for the second half of my integration i will format it similar to the previous ones as i look into how i can improve my life and how i would like to live it. this assignment was somewhat difficult for me as i have been dealing with a lot of death recently. i hope that this part of the integration will put things into a more positive light. my eulogy is somewhat short and blank because i really am unsure of what my life will be like. i feel that its incompleteness represents how my life is incomplete. everyone at my old school was required to go on this week-long trip called outward bound. during this trip, we were split into groups of about a dozen kids and had to navigate the appalachian mountains. we had to hike and navigate, learn survival skills to get through the august storms, work together, purify the water, make meals, and set up camps. we also engaged in a solo part where we were able to reflect and write a letter to ourselves that we would receive a year later. during this solo, i wrote about how thankful i was for all the great things and technology we have today. the trip and reflection time really put things into perspective. everything about it was so memorable and crystal clear in my mind even though i don't have many pictures or videos to remind me of it. i think this proves how slowing down can be extremely helpful. the opportunity i had to share time with a group of kids i may have never known is priceless and the self-discoveries i made about myself and the privileges i have on a daily basis was something i could never get by reading it on the internet or watching a video of someone else doing these things. from that trip on i was able to put my life into perspective and learn to live my life in a meaningful way. in pico lyer’s opening statements he exclaims, “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity; that’s why wise souls from every tradition have spoken of it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week one). i think this is a great analogy because it associates self discovery with natural and traditional laws and ideas. i think that taking a break or slowing down is crucial in this time because technology is somewhat of a disruption to our natural or human state. i think it is irrational to say that we should get rid of technology altogether, but i do think all good things come in certain quantities. layer explained his experiences at google where he discovered the seven-week program called “search inside yourself.” i have heard of similar programs and i have been in need of a break. i think that social media especially takes up way too much time out of my day. i also found myself searching for better ways to live as i watched the movie hesburgh (“hesburgh '' by jerry barcamoreau fye week two). it was really interesting to hear about hesburgh and all the inspiring things he did. as the president he changed what notre dame is by standing up for what he believes in and encouraging others to do the same. i think that the most important thing for us to do is to allow others to think and express how they feel and what they believe in and listen to them. even if you don't agree you can always take something away from what they said. hesburgh wanted to encourage everyone at notre dame to become better thinkers and the way to do that is to listen and take in more knowledge and opinions and form your own opinions. today, i think it is difficult to gather as much inspiration as hesburgh had because of the rise of media and technology. there is so much going on that people might tune out or tune in too much to information that is wrong or irrelevant. i think that it's hard to find inspiration in a world of negativity, but as the movie says, “if leadership is not there, we are ultimately governed by crisis.” i hope to become a lead just as he did. i want to live with compassion and love for everything i do. i often question how i can become this person. it seems really difficult to reflect on what kind of person i am because i instantly begin thinking about all the things i have done that are bad. and it can also feel like you are not making any progress in life when you try to think about what you have done in the past hour or day. i often think about my day before i go to bed and i think about what i have done for the world to make it better or to advance my future. it's hard to do this day to day because it doesn't seem like you are making any progress but eventually, i look back over the years and see some good and bad things that i have done. no one is perfect so there are always going to be some bad memories or moments but you have to look on the bright side of things and think positively in order to truly enjoy and live life. if you are always negative you will never see the enjoyment in life. just as i was saying before, you have to experience some bad things in order to enjoy the good moments, but that doesn’t mean you should dwell on the past. but as father michael himes states, “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us” (“three key questions” by michael himes moreau fye week three). i will strive to consistently ask questions about how i am living my life to keep me grounded to who i want to be. this brings me to my career and how i can implement not only my character and values to living a well lived life, but i can also use my job. i had my first business ethics class recently and we talked about how business and people in the industry are seen as bad people. and how our careers themselves basically destroy peoples lives or take from others. this seems like a very hard thing for me to cope with as i want to pursue this career. for doctors it seems very simple because their job is to `help others”, but i want to figure out how i can use my career for the best. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i truly believe this and previously talked about my job experiences in my qqc for week 4. i think that i am still struggling to figure out what i want to do with my life and i really would like to use real estate to help with issues of homelessness in philadelphia. with my mom and family growing up there and recent news of a former classmate being shot there, the cause has become even closer to my heart. but i struggle to figure out how i will get there. tasha eurich has a block quote in her piece that states, “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurishmoreau fye week six). when i came across this i thought that this was a pretty true statement. i think i have even fallen subject to many of the things she describes, but especially this one. often when i think too much about something it unleashes a whole new train of thought. in philosophy class a few weeks ago, we were talking about what the truth is and how it relates to reality. throughout the whole class, i just started going down this rabbit hole of dark thoughts on reality and morality along with all sorts of (basically) unanswerable questions. i left in a funk and was unsatisfied with how the world works. so i can see eurich’s point about how introspection can make us more confused; in philosophy, the “introspection” was more about the world and reality, but i think it also applies to thoughts on one’s self. with the season of lent here i would like to take more time to myself to reflect. i think that with all my friends always here, i don't get the opportunity to just take time to myself. i talked about my recent attempt to practice yoga and meditation everyday in the morning. i intend to keep doing this, but with my lent promise i think that i want to expand that time and take more time to reflect. but most important to my life now, and forever will be the people and relationships i develop. as pope fransis says, “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope fransismoreau fye week seven). i found this quote to be really interesting because i also believe this. we can’t just let time pass by us. i have found that the interactions i have with people are the most memorable things and they add meaning to my life story. life is not about time or knowledge necessarily, it is also about how we live that life and a big part of that has to do with how we connect with other beings and how we can add meaning to their lives and our own. as i said before, i feel like the relationships i have in my life are vital. although i wouldn’t say that i am a dependent person, i would say that my friendships and relationships with family are some of the most important parts of my life. when i was leaving for college it was really hard because i realized how much i valued those relationships with those people. the thought of losing people was really difficult. i think that it made it difficult for me in the beginning of the school year because i felt like there would not be people or relationships like those. although i was right, i would never have relationships like those ones. and over the break i was talking with my friends from home and one of them said, “well of course there isn’t going to be friendships that are identical to ours and the ones you have here, you have different relationships for different reasons.” this really sucked with me because i realized that the friends and relationships i was making at notre dame had different meanings and reasons. the friendships that i had at home are very strong and i have a lot of trust in those people, as i have known them my whole life. but the people i have met here have a different kind of shared experience and i am glad that i am able to meet so many different people from different backgrounds. i can see how the assignment is designed to make us think about who we would like to become, and i apologize if this is not what you intended for the assignment, but i like to somewhat manifest my future with the positive. i have been having a very rough few weeks and struggling to keep up mentally and physically which made it much more difficult to do this assignment. to conclude, i would like to make a promise to myself to reflect carefully, not to get bogged down in the past, and to look for the good i can bring to the future. i don't have a big master plan on how i will accomplish this, but for right now i am going to use lent as a time to make progress. fa21-fys-10102-64 professor oswald 4 march 2021 the importance of uncertainty in a life well lived as most of you know, my name is ryan fahey. we gather here today to celebrate the life of my father, . he lived an extraordinary life. he achieved many great things. he made the world a better place. and he was aware of his flaws. but what is most important to me and was also most important to my father is that he cared deeply for others. i’m reminded of a time my father was on an important business trip and had a day in between his meetings in new york. instead of spending the day relaxing in the city, he took a 3 hour train ride all the way home just to make it to my piano recital. it was this complete devotion to others that made him so special. i’m going to start with what i believe he would want me to focus on for a far longer time than i am willing. his faults. by his own admittance, brendan was not a perfect man. until his later life, he struggled to show his love and stay in touch with others. in his later years, he liked to repeat the line of father greg boyle. he would say the showing of love to others “was not so available to me in my own irish catholic background. you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle moreau fye week 7). this is a skill he struggled with his entire life. for instance, during his first year, he lost touch with many of his friends from home whom he loved dearly. he would always have to find something to text them about, rather than just asking how it's going. this is something that my father worked hard to ensure did not pass down to me. additionally, my father always dogged himself for his lack of assertiveness (“moreau week 5 qqc by '' moreau fye week 5). he shied away from confrontation. whenever we would decide where to go to dinner, he would never speak up even when you could tell he really did not want pizza from papa johns or dominos. perhaps it was part of his drive to put others first. he did not let these limitations get the best of him though. he actually used them to his advantage. in the days leading up to his death, he told me how he learned to live that way. he showed me the story of dr. jihoon kim (''5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fys week 6). dr. kim was a man who was paralized while snowboarding. while many would have given up following such a disaster, he had not. hearing of that experience gave my father the motivation to keep fighting, and inspired by him i strive to do the same. but now that i’ve talked at length about his shortcomings, i’d like to focus on what made him a great man. i’ll start with what i believe made him aware of his shortcomings his ability to reflect. every day after dinner, he would disappear into his bedroom; door locked. for many years, i suspected that he was continuing to do work, or just watching tv by himself for some alone time. however, i later realized that he was simply reflecting on his day, and how he could improve himself. he later told me that due to the speed and excitement of everyday life, we’re never caught up with our lives (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fys week 1). to him, it was incredibly important to take a few minutes every day to just stop and reflect. he spent long periods of time doing this throughout his life, and i believe this is what made him so aware of his own strengths and shortcomings. as i grew up, instead of talking about trivial things such as my grades in school or what toys i wanted for christmas, i got to learn more about who my father really was. during the summers of my late childhood, we would go to phillies games and spend hours less than focused on the game going on in front our eyes. he would tell me about when he was my age, and what struggles he went through. one time i asked him who his role model was. without a second of thought, he said father theodore hesburgh. he was the former president of my father’s alma mater, the university of notre dame. what my father said he admired so much about him was that he believed in mankind (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). he believed that everyone was worthy of equal treatment, and that only through working together and compromise can we achieve what we want to as a species. my father embodied this spirit in his work and home life. he spent his entire life serving this cause within the government, traveling the world to forge cooperation and strengthen bonds. and at home he did the same. i remember a time where i was fighting with a friend over a nerf gun. instead of punishing or yelling at either of us, he sat us down and taught us how to deal with our disagreements with words. to him, it was through cooperation and empathy that we can do great things, and i think his life's work perfectly embodies that spirit. my father was also always there for me when i was unsure about something in life. during my freshman year in college, i, like many, was uncertain about what i wanted to do with my life. i remember sitting in my dorm room late on a thursday night, just having gone to a major discernment meeting, feeling beaten down. despite all the effort i had put in, no career spoke to me. after a few minutes of sulking, i decided to call dad. he immediately picked up, and upon asking him about his discernment process, he told me his story. he recalled that during his freshman year at notre dame, he was just as uncertain as i was about what he wanted to do. moments of certainty for him were short lived. every time he felt confident in what he wanted to do, he would realize the problems with a major or discover another interest. jumping from political science to journalism to architecture to marketing in one year, he was completely lost. he was even nervous to look further into a major because he feared further examination would add yet another interest to the soaring mountain of discarded passions. with this experience, he offered me some advice your major does not determine where you go in life (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). he told me that no matter how daunting this decision might appear to be right now, you will find the right career eventually. his readiness to pick up that phone and be vulnerable to me when i was feeling vulnerable is one of things i cherished most dearly about my father. i think the trait or knowledge that led him to care so much for others and be such a great role model was his acute awareness of his own mortality. he told me the story of a nun named sister aletheia who kept skulls on her desk helped him stay grounded in the reality of the finity of life (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, nyt moreau fye week 3). he knew that his time on this planet was limited, and he therefore wanted to spend as much time as he could doing things that he loved. i think that's why he took that train home all those years ago. he loved us, and did not want to miss a second of time that could be spent by our sides. as i stand here today, in the shadow of my late father, i think back to how i can carry on his legacy through my actions. he knew exactly what a life well lived was. he had a distinct purpose in life. and i want to be just like him. i want to follow in his footsteps. in doing so, i hope to live a life well lived, just like dad. integration 3 march 1, 2022 discerning my own life well lived family and friends, i stand here before you as we celebrate the life of christopher salerno. he was loved by so many and strived everyday to make an impact on the people around him. he was a true believer in self reflection and meditation. he loved to use the quote, “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it,” when talking about getting to know ourselves and others (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). chris did not want to just use others to get the basic information that he needed and then move on from them. he believed in getting to know everyone on a more personal level and trying to help them get through their struggles. he believed that by reflecting on our day and our lives we can see the places where we made mistakes and could have helped others. his life was not free of bumpy roads. he struggled at times, especially in college, with finding the right path. like many of us he questions, “is this really what i’m doing with my life?” (“hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). through the help of many people in this room, he learned to trust that god and his decisions would lead him down the right path. there were times when his lifelong dreams felt like they were worthless now that he had achieved some of them, but his faith and family got him through it all. he stuck through the hard times and eventually lived a very successful life. chris’s hard work and perseverance prove to us all that you can accomplish anything despite setbacks. chris brought joy into everyone’s lives. he loved the quote,“happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). for him, it was about finding what you were passionate about and pursuing it with your entire heart. he poured his entire being into school, football, relationships, and his faith. he held his family relationships in high regard. he would spend countless hours with his grandparents, especially his grandma. they were some of his biggest role models. he did everything to make them proud and i know he accomplished that. he can now rest with them forever in paradise. chris treated life as one big trip. it is often said, “usually planning a trip is not a quick process depending on the nature of the trip but hopefully it’s also a bit fun and rewarding, especially if you end up having a really great time!” (“navigating your career journey” by muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). chris was always trying to plan out his life to be perfect, but in college he finally learned to let go a bit and enjoy the ride. he invested even more time into his friendships and relationships because he realized that is where he would find true happiness. we should use his example and make the most of every moment we have with our loved ones. we never know when it will be our last day with them. the bonds we create with others will outlast all other things in our lives, so we should cherish them. as well as cherishing his relationships with others, chris would love to get his loved one’s input and put it into practice. he listened to their advice about making the most of his life while he had the opportunity to do so. his father told him to enjoy his four years in college because once it was over the real world would hit him (week 5 irishcompass activity moreau fye week 5). he started to put this into practice more in his freshman year by getting to know more people and enjoying all that college had to offer. he loved to go to notre dame hockey https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/17101 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/17101 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ games and heckle opposing goalies and he also loved lacrosse games and would reminisce about his high school lacrosse days. chris tried to soak up everything that notre dame and life had to give. this was his way of living a life well lived. enjoying sporting events and other activities with his friends. chris was often someone that people were able to confide in. his life reminds me of the quote,“i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). he was always trying to find ways to help others and he was great at giving advice. he was never judgemental and would just look for solutions for people. chris often joked that he needed to listen to his own advice more often because he knew he was helping people, but he would go against his own advice quite often. he believed that we all needed to live more carefree and not worry what other people thought of us. if there is one thing that we should take from chris’s life, it is that,“we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). we all need each other to succeed in his life and i believe that is the most important thing that chris would want us to live by. he always told me that all of his achievements were not because of him, but because of all the people that helped him along the way. he was a humble man and he would want us to learn from all the good and bad things that he did in his life. may he rest in peace. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript gus heatherman moreau capstone integration notre dame: a place where my words become actions “how do i pursue a life well-lived?” to pursue a life well-lived, i need to define what a life well-lived is. over the course of the semester, my experiences both in and outside of class have helped me to discover what a life well-lived means to me. i hope to live by the following mission statement as a means of pursuing a life well-lived. my mission is to live a life characterized by compassion and responsibility. i will always remember the power that my choices have. my choices affect my life and the life of others. knowing this, it’s important to remember to think of others before myself when taking any action. in this way, i will live a life that helps me to grow in compassion and will help others become the best versions of themselves. i will always follow the example of jesus. jesus showed us that to help others, we ourselves must suffer. many people suffer in our world, and we must have the humility and courage to walk with them through their hardships, even when it causes us pain. i will make sure that my actions reflect my words in everything i do. it’s very easy to say words that reflect how i want to act but making these actions my reality is more challenging and important. in this way i will also work to be humble, letting my actions speak for me and keeping my successes to myself whenever i can. i will seek to educate myself so that i can grow in wisdom and use this wisdom for the betterment of humanity. there are many injustices in the world that can only be made right with the knowledge of how to combat them. educating myself will not only allow me to make better decisions, but it will also give me the power to educate others and in turn make the world a better place. i will give those who are close to me the love, attention, and respect that they deserve. my life would not be the way it is now without the support of many people. in the same way that these people have supported me, i will in turn support them to create a network of compassion and care that can serve as an example for other people. i will now share how i hope to turn this mission statement into a reflection of my actions for the next three years at notre dame. moreau fye ends with freshman year, but the knowledge i gained about how i want to live my life will stay with me for the rest of my notre dame experience. while at notre dame, i plan to continue to build upon my relationships with my friends. i think that an important aspect of this growth is remembering to think of my friend's needs alongside my own throughout our college experience. “we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality, and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame moreau fye week 10). in this way, i hope to always look for activities that all my friends can enjoy, take a genuine interest in the things that they like, and be an active listener when my friends need someone to confide in. by doing these things, i’ll be choosing to create an environment where none of my friends feel alone, helping myself grow in compassion and helping them to become the best versions of themselves. there are plenty of people in the south bend area to whom i can show love through service. following the example of jesus, i hope to engage in service activities while at notre dame, including working at a south bend homeless shelter, working for habitats for humanity, and donating blood. mother teresa said that “‘one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense.’" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). i believe doing these acts of service while at notre dame can be my way of loving at my own expense. the best part about this is that it will likely be the most enjoyable and fulfilling aspect of my time at notre dame. i want my actions to reflect my words and beliefs during my time at notre dame. “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future.”(the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i think that this quote perfectly exemplifies the way in which beliefs can be trapped in our words and not make it into our actions. we often ask why we believe things instead of what we are going to do with these beliefs. a simple way to answer this “what” question is to find ways to practice the things we believe. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). at the end of this quote, marcus cole says that “we must do something”. while this statement seems obvious, i think that a lot of times we often forget to act in the business of our lives. one way in which i plan to practice my beliefs is by giving part of my on-campus job wage to charity. i do not need all the money for myself, and since it is my belief that we should give up what we do not need for others, giving this money is a great way to put my beliefs into practice. another way in which i plan to put my beliefs into action is by continuing to pray and go to mass while at notre dame since i proclaim myself as a catholic. while at notre dame, i plan to educate myself through a variety of sources. with respect to how i receive information at notre dame that will help me grow in wisdom, i plan to not let myself stay in an echo chamber. “we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). i will be intentional with the information i receive by attending information sessions on campus, talking with friends of varying political leanings, and following many different news outlets instead of just one. this will let me grow in my own personal wisdom, which i will then be able to impart to others. i also wish to grow in wisdom through life experience. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame moreau fye week 4). as this quote says, i believe that i won’t be able to fully grow in wisdom if i don’t try new things. at notre dame, i plan to try many new things, such as new clubs and activities like bengal bouts, new classes such as accounting next semester, and most importantly meeting new people whom i haven’t interacted with before. all these new things will give me experiences that will shape my understanding of the notre dame community, helping me grow in wisdom as my knowledge and experience base grows. “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). a rightness of how to live one’s life produces joy, and there is no greater rightness in life than being loving to friends and family. while at notre dame, i hope to keep close relationships with my friends and family and to always let them know that they can rely on me for support. i will do this by spending quality time with my friends at notre dame and keeping in contact with family while i’m away at school. these are the ways in which i plan to put the words of my mission statement into action. i hope that the next three years i spend at notre dame are characterized by compassionate responsibility as i start to become the person i’ll be for the rest of my life. s2week 8 integration 3 prof. pruitt moreau first year experience march 2, 2022 pursuing a life well lived. “many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve. while such concerns must be taken very seriously, they are not invincible. they can be overcome when we don't lock our door to the outside world. happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component. even science – and you know it better than i do – points to an understanding of reality as a place where every element connects and interacts with everything else”pope francis. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). was a man who lived every day with this thought in mind. he was many things: a hard worker, a good resource, a musician, a world traveler, a leader, and above all else, a friend to all. joey sought to enjoy his life in every way he could. i think i speak for all of us when i say that i’ll miss that passion and fire—the way he loved to seize those opportunities at every possible chance he could get. one of the values which i, as well as countless others, learned from joey was the value of appreciating our differences. not everyone in the world is our best friend, but that doesn’t mean we can’t all be nice to one another. he taught us that a variety of relationships is key. though it doesn’t seem intuitive, surface level relationships are necessary to a fulfilled life and give deeper meaning to stronger ones. there’s not one answer to happiness, but what we know is that a balance is important. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript kositzke i distinctly remember one day when joey sent me the link to an article written by a nun who emphasizes reflecting on your death. he thought it was a fascinating concept that was worth exploring and valuing. one of my favorite bits of that article is the line: “to us, death is exotic, but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place”joanna ebenstein. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i don’t think there’s ever a eulogy that’s ‘happy’, but i know that today we should be celebrating all of the life that joey lived in his time on the planet. he was fully aware that things are finite and that it could all disappear on a moment’s notice. every second of his life was intentional. he preached reflection and seizing opportunities, and he definitely practiced what he preached. there was never a dull second in joey’s life from the second he graduated college. perhaps it was simply his drive, or perhaps it was the guidance he received from notre dame, or most likely a combination of the two, but he was dedicated to not wasting a minute. inspired by the lesson he experienced early in his college career: “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”, joey set out to embody this state of life every day (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). he took time to evaluate his interests and passions and he actively sought out experiences and chances to develop this understanding. it was a busy way of life but he wouldn’t have it any other way. and yet, he wasn’t drowned in reflection and self-discovery completely. he saw that “introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?login=email&auth=login-email https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?login=email&auth=login-email https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ kositzke fye week 6). sure, there is much value to be gained from examining our own actions, but we can’t forget about the value of living in the moment. all of us are familiar with the way that joey would call those around him to take a step back from the business and appreciate where we are, no other thoughts in mind. to him, the balance between reflection and blank experiences was a constant effort. it helped both him and all of us to live with a bit more appreciation of where we were and propelled us forward regardless of the situation we found ourselves in— and it continues to do so. like i said, joey always tried to stay in tune with our present world. he would always joke about the craze of technology that surrounded us all, but in the end he helped many of us see beyond the reach of our screens. one quote he’d always point to was kevin kelly’s advice on technology: “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). though it was often a joke between us, there was a lesson to be gained from his perspective on the topic. it is so easy to get caught up in life without realizing where we are, or even who we are. one of the key terms joey liked to say in regards to this was “realignment”. the idea of seeing where we are and where we need to be, the idea that we aren’t always on the right track but it is never too late to correct course. when we realign, we grow. and then there’s the matter of influence. we’re all here today because joey impacted us deeply in some way or another. though he’d hate to take credit for it, this was the result of good leadership and being a good person as a whole. if you ask anyone who met joey to describe him, one of the first words they would usually say is “kind”. he’d always like to cite people like his https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ kositzke own university’s father hesburgh as strong influences that helped him become the man he was (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). wherever it came from, joey was a master of spreading goodwill and kindness to all he met. and boy, did he meet a lot of people. whether through linkedin, irish compass, or a chance meeting in person, each and every connection that he made was rooted in these values (moreau fye week 5). we’re going to miss joey, but the good news is that his legacy is here to stay. there was not a second with him we regret spending, not a conversation we regret having, there are no regrets when it comes to joey. only joy and appreciation. thank you all for coming today and remembering a life well lived, and may we all continue to embody joey’s memory as we go through life. have a great day. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 10102 4 february 2022 eulogy of a force for good in the world throughout the last few weeks in moreau, we’ve focused intently on the “life welllived.” each successive week has built off the last, helping me formulate and reflect more deeply on what my goals are in my time on earth. like everybody, i have aspirations for my life, both specific and non-specific. i can tell you things like i want to graduate from notre dame with a degree in finance, i hope to maintain good grades in doing so, i desire a fulfilling job after college, i want to find a wife i love and have an awesome family, and so forth. but above all else, i must consider why i have developed these dreams. sure, almost everybody wants to be successful and happy in life, but what is the underlying principle that holds these goals together. all too often, people think of their life as a series of boxes to check. graduation, check. highpaying job, check. wife and kids, check. these are all appropriate items to wish for, but they don’t answer the “why” behind themselves. ultimately, the driving force behind the aspirations for my life is that i want to be a force for good in our world, as fr. sorin once famously quoted, and i hope that conviction is reflected in my eulogy. the first step in determining whether my eulogy can match this conviction comes from the first week of the year, in which we discussed self-reflection. i was particularly drawn to pico iyer’s article about slowing down and taking time to look back and see how far we’ve come (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). even i fall into the temptation of checking the boxes of life, without considering why i really want them or why https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ they’re important. at the end of my life, when my eulogy is being read, it won’t matter how much money i made or how successful i was. what people will remember me for is how i used my god-given abilities to positively impact others. i’m pursuing a job in the financial services industry, which often comes with the connotation of being greedy and exploitative. however, i hope i’m able to make a considerable amount of money with the ultimate intention of giving it away. i have no desire for a yacht, a second home, or a rolex watch. in line with my desire to be a force for good in the world, i hope others will see this in my as i write the last chapter of my life. in determining what i define as a life well-lived, the ultimate criteria for my eulogy, i can look to heroes of mine for inspiration. i hope my eulogy can reflect that i fit as much into my time on this earth as possible, similar to what we saw in fr. hesburgh in the movie from the second week (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fys week 2). two of the qualities i admired most about fr. hesburgh were his inability to stay silent on critical issues and his commitment to doing as much good with his role as possible. he was often an associate to presidents, social justice advocates, and religious leaders alike, demonstrating his willingness to support the causes he saw as just. i too hope my eulogy portrays a disposition towards change, but for it to do so, i must act when opportunities present themselves. i don’t particularly desire a career in politics, but i do believe i should be vocal about the changes i want to see made in my country. one cause that’s important to me is repealing roe v. wade, because i believe all individuals, big or small, have the right to life. i have already decided that next year i will attend the march for life, and this is only the beginning of the work i can do. i was pleasantly surprised when i saw we we’re reading about michael himes’s three questions about vocational discernment in moreau, because, earlier in the year, i had also https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ explored them in my theology class (“three key questions” by michael himes – moreau fye week 3). one particular item he makes note of in his book is the distinction between joy and happiness. he believes joy is the conviction that what one is doing is beneficial for another person, even if what one is doing doesn’t bring them happiness or pleasure. joy doesn’t expect to be rewarded for anything because it is an expression of pure self-gift. on the other hand, happiness can vary widely depending on a number of factors, such as if one is given anything in exchange for what they’re doing. happiness can be fleeting, but joy is the continual disposition of this conviction. i won’t be the one who writes my eulogy, but i can help shape it by demonstrating in my life that i pursued what i knew what was right, regardless of how it impacted me. one of the best parts about life is that no one can write your story for you because ultimately, you’re the author. a quote that meant a lot to me this semester reads: “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (meruelo family center for career services – moreau fye week 4). although as of this moment i have a desire to pursue a career in finance, i have considered all sorts of options, including engineering, the military, and even the jesuits. my eulogy can describe my role in any number of capacities, but what matters more to me is that i gave everything a fair chance. i can’t be afraid of failure, for if i am, i won’t experience all that life has to offer. the occupation in my eulogy doesn’t matter… what does is how i used that occupation to be a force for good in the world. in this discernment about my vocational calling, i cannot rely merely on my own intellect. i must use the god-given abilities, talents, and blessing of others to make a sound decision and to pursue something that i know is beneficial for others. along with family, friends, and mentors, one potential source is academic resources at my school. in the fifth week of class, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/472889?module_item_id=146789 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 i had the opportunity to interview my brother about what he saw were my strengths, weaknesses, and opportunities for growth (“discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week 5). everyone has their own unique skillset, ordained on them by god before time, and i believe an effective and just use of these skills is critical to a life well-lived. the theme my brother talked on most was that he saw everything i have done throughout my life thus far has been aimed towards a higher purpose, above my self-interest. this made me proud to hear, because it indicated that i was well on my way to becoming a force for good in the world, as fr. sorin prompted me to do. i won’t be the one to deliver the eulogy at my funeral, but if others see these traits in me then i wholeheartedly believe i am on my way to fulfill my calling. as strong as this conviction is in my heart, i know the road to a well-lived life isn’t always easy. in fact, the road is filled with bumps, bruises, and scratches all along the way. oftentimes, we look outward for these obstacles. many times, though, they come from within. all too often i fall into the trap of being too critical of myself in ways i can’t control. in tasha eurich’s ted talk, i learned that this introspection can be incredibly useful in analyzing our days, but it can also be harmful if we only focus on the negative (“the right way to introspection (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). one of the resources offered by the mcdonald center was five-minute meditations, and since discovering them, i have tried to do them a number of times a week. they have assisted me in becoming more mindful, relaxed, and confident regarding the effectiveness of my days in pursuing my aspiration to be a force for good in the world. i believe this introspection is vastly important because it recenters me around what’s truly valuable in life, constructing the chapters in my life bit by bit. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ our ultimate and shared calling as catholics is to love one another as christ has loved us. what holds us back from attaining this objective is the barriers we set up around our jurisdictions, our circles of whom we should love and care about (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week 7). fr. boyle’s work in this book and in real life are incredible, as he aims to break down any barrier we might have from loving even the lowliest among us. he lives and works amongst many reformed gang members, and despite their heinous actions in the past, he sees nothing but christ in them. my life is in part defined by others’ perceptions of me. whoever may be giving my eulogy will have witnessed my love, or lack thereof, for my neighbors. i hope and truly do believe that the love i show for my family, friends, fellow highlanders, and all those whom i come across will continue to be built upon and that i will be regarded as a force for good after i’ve departed from this earth. throughout this paper, i intentionally strayed from deliberating the verbiage of what i hope my eulogy will deliver. i never mentioned what specifically i will do, who i will meet, and what i will make of my life, because when i’m gone, those things won’t be what i was remembered for. what i will be remembered for is the overall theme and motive behind each of those instances. i define my theme as answering fr. sorin’s calling for each one of us, including notre dame herself, to be a force for good in the world. i cannot dictate how others will view my life, but i can manage the things within my jurisdiction. above all else, nothing is stopping me from loving others as christ has loved me. i believe i have and will continue down this path, and in doing so, i hope the thesis of this paper is the same as in my eulogy: is and was a force for good in the world. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844?module_item_id=167972 a. thigpen moreau fye 16 april 2022 i want to be everyone’s cheerleader my mission is to prioritize adventure, family, and meaningful actions in my life. i want to be surrounded by those who i love. i want to travel the world with my family. i want to raise my kids not far from the beach so that they can share in my love for the ocean. i want to be the mom who always has the best snacks at playdates. i want to be a person who others come to for support or advice. i want to receive this support back through affirmations in all of my relationships. i want to be the annoying woman screaming on the phone with her friends. i want to be happy in my career (i’ll have the best snacks there too). i want to use my knowledge and career to give back to my community. i want to make service a part of my lifestyle. i want to make a difference. throughout this year’s moreau classes, i have learned about and reflected on many things that will hopefully help me to achieve this mission. in week 1 of moreau, we learned about practicing self-reflection. in an article about the speed of life, iyer writes, “we’re never caught up with our lives…,” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this means that we never take the time to slow down and absorb what is really going on in our lives and how we feel about it. from this, i have realized how often i do this. i am striving to push myself to take the time to reflect a little on each day and in doing so, at least so far, have found it makes me feel more grateful. in week 2 of moreau, we saw the inspiration of a life well-lived in father hesburgh. in a documentary about his life, hesburgh says “...that peace is important, that human life is important, that we have to learn to talk to each other,” ("hesburgh" 1:10:02 moreau fye week 2). he recognizes that talking to each other is the most important aspect of creating good relationships. i took this to heart, recognizing that i need to really talk to those around me so that our relationships can be real and grow. in week 3 of moreau, we looked at the questions of a life well-lived. with one of those being death, ruby graham writes that “...focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic,” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). this was a good way of explaining that life is not made by only the good moments. the bad moments shape who we are as people and because of that being appreciative of them is important in having a satisfactory life. in week 4 of moreau, we explored a life well-lived by looking at career paths. the career center writes, “there seems to be a commonly held belief that in our society that a major equals a certain career path,” ("navigating your career journey" by mereulo center for career development moreau fye week 4). this was refreshing to read. to see that a major does not define what i will be doing for the rest of my life makes me feel a lot more relaxed. i know that i can make a path for myself to move forward in my career. in week 5 of moreau, we discerned how to live a life well-lived by taking to someone important in our lives. when i talked to my mom, she said that i am “...a true cheerleader in that [i] want to cheer others on, lift their spirits, and celebrate their ‘wins’,” (jolee david (my mom) moreau fye week 5). my discussion with my mom reminded me of who i am inside. she reminded me how much lifting the spirits of others brings me joy. i want to continue to strive to do this and have made it part of my mission for a life well-lived. in week 6 of moreau, we saw some obstacles to a life well-lived. in an article warning about the downfalls of looking inside yourself, eurich says, “introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue,” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this was really interesting to me because i feel like looking inside is always something that is seen as being helpful in life. i never thought about how this could be hurting me. i have realized that i need to look at every situation and not assume i have found the exact cause of every issue. in week 7 of moreau, we looked at the relationships that make a life well-lived. as someone who has been involved in the lives of many, fr. greg boyle writes, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention,” ("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle, pg. 136 moreau fye week 7). i think that fr. boyle gives a really unique perspective. by creating environments free of judgment, we have the opportunity to learn so much about the people around us. creating environments like this is something that i hope to do with my family and others in my life. in week 9 of moreau, we learned about how we can respond to suffering. in his description of a relationship with people he was supposed to be helping, reifenberg says, “it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility.” ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). this explanation of accompaniment got me thinking. accompaniment is to be there for someone with whatever you can bring, even if that is not everything that they need. this made me realize that i do not always need to provide a solution to those around me, just being there to support them is enough. in week 10 of moreau, we learned how to embrace humanity. in notre dame’s statement about inclusion, it says, “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures.” ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" from the du lac moreau fye week 10). describing diversity as uniqueness shines a more positive light on the differences that we all have. embracing diversity is what makes life interesting. it is what allows us to grow our knowledge and perspectives. in my life going forward, i want to continue to embrace diversity and to learn from those with different experiences than me. in week 11 of moreau, we learned how to grow in wisdom. in a podcast about the false roads passion can lead you to, it says, “millions of americans are like eitan's dad. they eagerly follow television personalities and the ups and downs of the latest scandal in washington” ("passion isn't enough" by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). this quote is explaining that many americans are so pulled into television that they are not participating in politics as they should be because they are pulled into the drama and cannot see the real facts. it made me evaluate my use of the media and realize that the media should not be the center of my life. i need to do my best to avoid being drawn into my drama and use facts in order to have educated opinions. in week 12 of moreau, we learned about how we can act with courage. the congregation of the holy cross is an example of courage because “[their] efforts, which are his, reach out to the afflicted and in a preferential way to the poor and the oppressed. [they] come not just as servants but as their neighbors, to be with them and of them.” ("constitutions of the congregation of holy cross" by holy cross congregation moreau fye week 12). in my life, the holy cross congregation sets a great example of how to live for god. i want to serve others and use all that i have to give back to my community so that i may feel fulfilled. integration 2 my lever in moreau we’ve been discussing a lot about what makes us who we are and how to be satisfied in life. i think this is an extremely important discussion because of the fact that thinking about these ideas makes us more knowledgeable about what we truly want and will make us more satisfied. i think that satisfaction in life comes from a lot of things, but one of those things is definitely living a life that i believe is good, meaningful, and purposeful. i think this class is important in setting our goals and definitions of success in our lives. i think a lot of people have a goal of being successful in life. i think success is a stupid word, maybe the most stupid word. it’s something everyone wants yet it’s one of the most subjective things maybe ever. one person’s success is another’s failure. people have goals contrary to each other, so somebody always loses. you’d be better off just saying what it is you want instead of blanketing it behind the vaguest term imaginable. the thing is, i only really see success used in a traditional context as a synonym for wealthy; i feel like it’s almost used as a type of superiority complex, and i’m certain it's something many people have inferiority complexes about. i think that having a specific definition of success is important to accomplish what you believe is meaningful in life, and not just to be rich. i think if you don’t have a decent definition of success, you probably will never find it. i think my definition of success is making the world a better place than it would be without me and enjoying life. this brings me to the two questions that i am discussing in this assignment: what am i made for, and what i am made of. i think i am made for a lot of things, and this corresponds to what i am made of. i am made of experiences as an older brother, and i’m made for helping my siblings and being there for them throughout our lives. i’m made of the moments i feel the most alive, whether it's music, sports, or games, i’m made for having fun. i believe everyone is made of a myriad of special things, and as a result everyone is made to express themselves, whether through art, music, poetry, movies, games, or discussion. i’m made of all the lessons i learned from everyone i’ve met, and i am made for understanding others, learning from the most unlikely sources, and being a good friend. i am made for empathy, for carrying out a life that i feel is good, for moving the world and universe in a direction that i feel is good, even if i have the tiniest impact in the grand scheme of things. these goals are interrelated; my goal of making the world a better place will help me be there for my siblings, my friends, and everyone else along the street that i’ll meet. i see so many problems and even if i can spend my life working on alleviating just one of them, i’d be extremely happy. i have many opportunities that i view as levers to reach my goal. i’m made of curiosity, and as a result i’m made for learning, and i’ve learned so much, whether that’s in the classroom, on the field, or just relationships and life. (week 2) i view my intelligence and what i’ve learned as a tool, a lever as archimedes would put it, to change the world and help people who may have been through the same experiences that made me. i’m made of hardships, i’m made to help others through those. (weeks 5, 7, 9, & 10) maybe one day others will be made of lessons i might have helped them learn. i’m at one of the most prestigious universities in the nation, that’s a lever too. there’s so many good opportunities to do research, make connections, and learn that i’ll likely be set up with more levers in the future and i can work on many research projects to help people all across the world already. this is something i’ve already started with high school research and lab involvement. i’m made of curiosity, i’m made to find new knowledge. like i said earlier, i see so many issues and i hope to help people by solving them one day. i want to help people less fortunate than me get through their tough times, and not by just volunteering to give out food, but by helping alleviate the situation for everyone, and by inspiring everyone to volunteer and help out. i want to use my levers to create something that will help others, whether it's through research or philanthropy or social change. i want to give my best try at feeding the hungry, healing the sick, inspiring others. i want to help people through their bias, mistakes or manipulation; i want to show the disheartened that life is intrinsically good. these goals may be general and vague, but that’s what makes them so powerful. they’re something everyone agrees are noble goals. they’re goals every rational person can get behind and support in their own special way with the right motivation. this is the greatest lever of them all. i’m made of everything i’ve seen and done, the summation of all my actions and memories and people i‘ve met. this made the older brother, athlete, musician, debaters, and now notre dame student that i am today. all of these labels are words showing that there’s so many others who have gone through the same experiences and are made from the same things. (week 11) others have the same dreams as me in helping the world, others have the same ideas to protect their siblings, to research and create something new. i think ultimately i’m made for connection, taking these concepts, ideas, and dreams that i share with many others and expressing them in my own unique way, but in a way that can inspire others, in ways that others can use as a model to push their dreams forward and inspire more, and a model that people can use to learn from and encounter opposition with empathy. (weeks 9-12) that’s what i’d like to do, to take all the ideals that i’m made of and express why i’m made of them. to take the universe and try to move it in a way i believe is truly good with every lever i’ve got. moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 due by october 15, 5:00 pm edt for all sections directions: utilizing the integrative learning skills, as described in the yellow box below, respond to the prompt. be sure to include the required components for the prompt, which are listed in the green box paying particular attention to citing course material as described in the orange box. create your integration file using any tool of your choice (word, google doc, etc.) and upload as a pdf to canvas via the week 8 integration assignment found within the week 8 module. prompt: what do i believe? for the past several weeks, you have been invited to deepen your self-knowledge as it relates to your personal development. in response, utilize and integrate the required content, your independent and critical thinking, and your in-class conversations from weeks 1-7 to identify and describe your root beliefs. root beliefs are statements of conviction that shape your choices and priorities. these beliefs should answer “why”: why do you do what you do? root belief statements are not “i believe in...” rather, they are "i believe that..." statements. a few potential sentence stems are: i believe that i am searching for... i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by... i believe that my purpose is to… i believe that i will grow by… i believe that i am responsible for.. i believe that i pursue the truth by... i believe that my community should… i believe that i am made to... etc. after stating your root beliefs (the number of root beliefs may vary), describe the origins, development, challenges, and implications of each root belief. a few guiding questions might be: why do you believe this? how have you come to believe this? how has this belief been challenged? how does this belief influence your actions? remember, you are required to integrate content from each week of weeks 1 7 in your response. you are also highly encouraged to include any content, resources, or other meaningful information you’ve encountered this year. be sure to consult the boxes below for greater detail on assignment requirements. moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 integrative learning skills integrative learning is the process of making connections between ideas and experiences inside, outside, and across classes. this powerful technique helps you learn more deeply and in a way that sticks. describe relevant evidence from your experience at notre dame and its effect on you. anything you did, produced, or experienced in a class or club, through recreation or volunteering, etc. is appropriate. connecting/transferring this evidence by relating it to what you have learned in this course and in any other campus context. ground your discussion in course materials (i.e.reference/quote them directly and explain why they support your point). reflecting/evaluating your progress towards the prompt’s main learning goal and articulating your plans/goals for future growth or application of what you have learned. required components for prompt ❏ response in pdf format is uploaded before the due date as a response to “week 8 integration one” found in the week 8 module in canvas. ❏ prompt response begins with a unique and meaningful title. ❏ integrative learning skills are used to make connections between ideas and experiences. ❏ prompt response cites content from the weeks specified within prompt description. ❏ course material is cited with the title, creator, url (pasted or linked), and moreau fye week in parentheses (see example below). ❏ prompt response contains at least 1000 words citation example (“ the power of vulnerability ” by brené brow n moreau fye week one) how to create a pdf file from microsoft word and google docs how to create a pdf file from a microsoft word document: https://www.howtogeek.com/352668/how-to-convert-a-microsoft-word-document-to-a-pdf/ how to create a pdf file from a google doc: https://9to5google.com/2019/11/09/create-google-docs-pdf-document/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.howtogeek.com/352668/how-to-convert-a-microsoft-word-document-to-a-pdf/ https://9to5google.com/2019/11/09/create-google-docs-pdf-document/ moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 rubric outstanding: insightful and an example for others completes all required response activities. includes a meaningful title, citations and meets the word count. prompt response cites content from all of the weeks specified within the prompt description. insightfully applies all integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing is free of distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors. 200 superior: thoughtful and well-composed completes most required response activities but does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response cites content from almost all of the weeks specified within the prompt description. thoughtfully applies most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains a few distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors, but the reader can follow ideas clearly. 188 good: a serious effort completes some required response activities but does not include a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response cites content from some of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a complete response that applies some integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which hinder clear communication. 172 acceptable: could be improved and elaborated upon most required response activities are not included such as a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response utilizes content from one of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a complete response but does not apply most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which prevent the reader from following ideas clearly. 154 minimal: limited effort shown required response activities are not included such as a meaningful title, does not meet the word count and/or does not include citations. prompt response does not utilize content from any of the weeks specified within the prompt description. provides a response that is not complete and does not apply most integrated learning skills, including strong connection to course materials and articulation of plans/growth. writing contains distracting spelling, punctuation, and grammatical errors which prevent the reader from following ideas clearly. 132 unacceptable : no effort is shown no assignment is submitted or the response does not address the prompts 0 deduction for late work (20 points per day late; including days instructor does not have access) total integration one assignment score (200 points max) moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 intergragting into the domer life i believe that i am searching for wisdom and a community that suits me well. while at nd, i have been blessed enough to be near students passionate about changing the world. everyone i have made has an overwhelming joy about being memorable, unlike anything i have seen at my high school. compared to my high school, most of my encounters have been, for better words, dull and not as trilling at nd. with the nine weeks i have been here, i feel like i have learned more from my classmates than a professor at nd could ever teach me. it is 20x easier to be vulnerable with students and share academic and non-academic things with professors at nd. i have been vulnerable and talked about personal meaning items in my life are the times i bonded the most with students on this campus. honestly, especially here, it is easy to be friendly with the students since the community is welcoming and willing to pull you in. i think a significant trait of nd is the students being vulnerable and so very genuine that makes talking to anyone comfortable. after being here for only nine weeks, i think i found a group of people that i think are my best friends? and people that i genuinely enjoy being around and make efforts to see. that feels strange to say since most of these people were strangers for nine weeks, but it magically came together. i think everything came together because of the friendly community at nd and not being afraid to be vulnerable. the quotes read as, "why are we alone and vulnerable? we num vulnerability when we are waiting for the call". this quote represents an interesting take on what being vulnerable is. the women in the ted talk describe vulnerability as something that is a challenging task to do. being open to others is something that is not easy to come to. i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by bonding over similar niches and hobbies i have with someone. i feel like the best way to create a conversation on campus with anyone or any person is to bond over shared interests and traits we have in common. a quote that describes nd virtues says, "we live in a culture with an atom one mentality" this quote signifies a lot from the get-go and can be relatable for us to have in our minds when thinking about our authentic self. well, for starters, at notre dame, everyone is unique, memorable, and unique in their way, and with a surplus amount of that in one concentrated place (notre dame), it can be overwhelming. honestly, this is becoming very true! the nd has been accepting and open-minded, which makes it way easier to integrate as a person of color, especially (at a pwi). on top of that, i pursue truth by being authentic and speaking what is on my mind. i am open to speaking what is on my mind and hearing authentic, fresh, academic perspectives that i have never heard of before in a friendly, conversational way that is always fruitful. moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 i believe that my purpose is to live a good life. especially since i am taking god and the good life, i intend to live every day to the best of my ability. no one knows how long we will be alive and living each day, hour, second, and moment with the hope of it being the best and believing it will be good. being proactive and assuming good things is a mindset to embody that can only benefit you. a quote from my philosophy class, god and the good life that will stick with me forever is, "most of what we say and do is not essential. if you can eliminate it, you will have more time and more tranquility. ask yourself at every moment, 'is this necessary?' but we need to eliminate unnecessary assumptions as well. to eliminate the unnecessary actions that follow." – marcus aurelius. this quote is the framework for what i think everyone should live by and something i try to live by myself after learning about it. it reminds me of a quote from week 1 where we talked about being vulnerable and being open to change and a quote i remember from watching "it helps to have a framework for life." this quote is crucial since it reminds students how helpful plans are in our crazy busy lives. having a to-do list makes life most accessible and breaks things down into tiny pieces. having to-do lists gives us structure in our lives and makes things less confusing. "why are you spending so much time with jenny?" i specifically picked this quote since it most definitely is harmful primarily for all intents and purposes. the comment that someone can most definitely say to someone else in a very, really big way in a significant way. i also believe that i am responsible for being the best version of myself that makes me happy. taking happiness into your hands can aid in your mental health and perspective on the world and ultimately change the game. having the intention to make your life better and the best it can be is a refreshing mindset. furthermore, i believe that i grow by making mistakes and learning from others. but also making mistakes is a very normal thing to go through. although failure and rejection at an academic location like nd can feel like the end of the world, it isn't. classes like moreau help students realize the bigger picture and help us reflect on our "nd bubble issues'' that are very microscopic so they do not become too daunting onto our lives. i believe that i am made to be the best version of myself. no one can honestly measure "the best version" of what they can be, but evolving and making mistakes in a climate like nd is typical and something we will go through. the person we are walking on nd campus to graduating and becoming an alumnus is a lot of time to change, character development that i cannot wait to experience in my next four years here! moreau first year experience integration one assignment fall 2021 sources https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3&ab_chann el=tedxtalks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3&ab_channel=tedxtalks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3&ab_channel=tedxtalks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://drive.google.com/file/d/1yvemqubaas5dnbpym806tyqzr3f0xelp/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ yusman_capstone integration professor wagner moreau fye april 28, 2022 finding the life i live to die for what does it mean to “pursue a life well-lived”? in the article why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer talks about how sometimes we need to “[not] just do something,” but instead, “sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week 1). so, then, a life well lived may not be one filled with activity as many would think. i know that i personally have fallen into this trap of believing that a well-lived life is one full of activity. often times in school, including here at notre dame, i’ve attempted to find a fulfilling semester by filling it with activities and classes. however, i’ve quickly found myself overwhelmed and burnt out, wishing i had time to just “sit there” and think abut life. interestingly, this mistake is one i’ve made outside my direct actions, but in my personal mission statement as well. initially, i described my mission as one involving “constant” learning, working for others, and seeking out challenges. sure, these things are good and honorable, but i still leave no time for rest. in comparison, notre dame’s mission statement describes goals of “disciplined habits of mind, body, and spirit” for its students (“mission” by notre dame moreau fye week 13). within this lies this idea of rest and tending to one’s self rather than a constant push to “do.” taking these lessons into account in my own life, then, i may begin the pursuit of a life well-lived not as a sprint, but a jog. in moderation and consideration for my well-being while pushing to do all i can for others. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ now that i know how i will approach this life well-lived, what does it consist of? what will i do to pursue it? well, notre dame’s center for career development says that these choices should be based on my values, interests, personality, and skills(vips) (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame ccdmoreau fye week 4). this certainly seems like a solid starting point. in my journey so far at notre dame i’ve already used these vips without knowing to pick my classes and activities in my free time. my choice of major, decision to start climbing, and even the people i interact with all have come down to these core things about myself. looking into the future then, i can apply these to new opportunities, relationships, and life choices to guide my pursuit of a life well-lived. stepping back and taking a look at my life, how do i want my pursuit do be remembered? in the practice of memento mori revived by sister alethia, sister aletheia, she suggests asking “where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who…” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). looking again at my mission statement, i can tell that i put emphasis on helping others. agreed with by my girlfriend when, in a conversation about who i am as a person, she said that “i value the humanity of individuals and feel that many people do not get the respect they deserve.” (discernment conversation with kelsey goldwein moreau fye week 5). thus, i know that in pursuing a life well lived i should seek to help those around me and in my communities, working to value their humanity when others may not see them so. thus, when i die i might be remembered in this way, and maybe even guide others to do likewise. it is in this way that i will work to pursue a life well-lived over the next three years of my life, and likely into the future. taking courses that lead me towards helping others, but giving time for rest, and finding community around those traits most central to myself. through these https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html concepts and my mission statement, then i may find a life well-lived, and live it so that i shall be remembered for it when i die. integration paper 2 brynn o’donnell 1 encountering first semester this semester of moreau has led me to ponder a lot of important questions and given me a better understanding of the issues and topics that we discussed in class. i have encountered a lot of new ideas and i have tried my best to not only internalize them but react to these ideas and make changes in the way i live my life. i have learned new things about setting expectations for myself, how addressing brokenness can lead to healing, how to be better connected to my community, and how to have hope. one thing i took away from the course, specifically from week nine is that i cannot expect myself to always meet expectations set by myself and others. i know that it is important to try my best but i learned that i also have to accept myself when i fall short. if i am focused solely on living up to expectations, when i fail it will be very upsetting. it will also become a never-ending cycle, as pressure from others will always be present. in one of the articles from week nine, i gathered that once one stops worrying about expectations it is easier to accept one’s shortcomings and easier to establish what is best for oneself, not merely what one should do. the author states, “instead of asking, “what should i do?” or “what would my friend/ parent/ significant other expect me to do?”, ask yourself, “what do i want to do?” and “what do i think is best?” (“why letting go of expectations is a freeing habit” by julia hogan moreau fye week nine). i thought the content from this week was something i really needed to hear, and i tried my best to take hogan’s words and put them into action. i had been stressed earlier in the semester about what major i wanted to pursue because i came to college with expectations that i could accomplish certain things that turned out to be more difficult than i originally planned. to figure out what was best for me i had to stop worrying about expectations of what my parents wanted me to do and the expectations i set for myself of what grades i wanted to have. in the https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau o’donnell 2 end, i concluded that my original plan was what is best for me and what i want to do—i just need to be more kind to myself when i struggle in difficult classes, which i have been trying to do. another expectation that i had in my mind was that in college you are supposed to make really meaningful friendships with the people around you. since i’ve been here i have made some really great friends, but i also realized that i cannot be extremely close with everyone. the week eleven content taught me that “the most common connotation of the word “community” in our culture is “intimacy,” but this is a trap…intimacy is neither possible nor necessary across this entire range of relationships” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this made it more clear to me that i can rely on my community without being super close with every individual because that is just unrealistic. since reading this material i think i have been better at connecting with people in my gateway community, classes, etc. that i am not necessarily close with. however, i found we still have a connection of being a part of the tri-campus and even if i am not close friends with someone i can still have meaningful encounters with them. much like i learned that struggling in class was bound to happen and it was okay as long as i work hard and try my best, i learned that struggling in general is inevitable and can even lead to a good outcome. week twelve of the course emphasized that “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (“hopeholy cross and christian education” by fr. james b. king, c.s.c. moreau fye week twelve). i had the mindset that struggling was bad, but i realized it is not so black and white, but instead struggling and facing adversity can make one stronger. in the midst of adversity, i need to have hope that it is making me a stronger person and http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ o’donnell 3 i will get through whatever temporary struggle i am going through. for example, when i struggle in my physics class, although it is not fun, it is teaching me how to study better and get through difficult things. when i struggle in a drill at ultimate frisbee practice, i feel that i am not good at frisbee, but it is actively making me better. it became clear to me that i should try to look on the bright side and that every time i struggle i am becoming better in some aspect. i cannot have the expectation that struggling is bad and that i should never struggle at anything. both weeks nine and twelve taught me that struggling from time to time is okay. another thing i struggled with this semester was the death of my grandpa. this actually happened right around week ten of the course and i found the content of that lesson very timely. as i wrote my week ten qqc in florida while i was there to attend the funeral, i thought it related a lot to my situation at the time. a quote that stood out to me from one of the articles was, “everybody, i hope, walks away with this greater connection to who they are. that they learn that the things that they’ve experienced… it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). from the material i took away the idea that i had to address what was making me upset—much like the women in the article—instead of repressing my emotions and negative feelings. dealing with the death of a loved one was not enjoyable at all, but it made me stronger, and i know this is something that i am going to have to do throughout my life. i was fortunate enough to not have to deal with it until this year. i really tried to take the message from week ten and allow myself to be sad during that time because i knew it would lead to future healing. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ o’donnell 4 overall, these last few weeks of moreau have taught me to have a positive mindset and that even if something does not live up to my expectations or if i am struggling, something good can still come out of it. yusman_integration 3 professor wagner moreau fye 3 march 2022 a hopeful reflection in beginning to write my eulogy, it is important to first think about the life i’ve lived as a whole. the life i’ve lived has, and likely will be, one of constant motion, dotted with moments of stillness and thought. between homework, social obligations, and a need to feel productive at all hours driven into me by years of constant schooling, i rarely find a moment of true quite, but when i do, i try to fill it with reflection. in the article why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer talk about how sometimes we need to “[not] just do something,” but instead, “sit there.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week 1) by taking time to reflect on my life i choose the direction that it runs, shaping it in ways which my eulogy make come to reflect. it allows me to “craft” the eulogy that may one day be written about me. directing the author’s stories as though i was the one holding the pen. so we’ve learned how i’ll guide this eulogy of my life, but what will inspire it? i don’t truly know. fr. hesburgh, a well known priest and president of the university of notre dame, wrote that “[he] wanted to become a navy chaplain, but [his] superiors told [him] no…as time went on [he] came to love teaching…it wasn’t what [he] was expecting, but [he] served in my own way.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week 2) that which he had aspired for was not what he became known for, it was not being a navy chaplain that inspired his life well-lived, but rather teaching and guiding notre dame, something that he never could have predicted from the start. similarly, my life may guide me away from what i think will inspire a https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 life well-lived, and it is something i may only know after it has come to pass. it’s also possible that i may never know it. that i may reach a life well-lived by some seeming accident. in that case i hope that in the perspective of a loved one writing my eulogy that it may become clear. if i do not know what path i may end up on, then how do i know what to follow? what questions may i ask of myself to a life-well lived before death? sister aletheia, in her revival of momentum mori, suggests asking “where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who…” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) these questions are not perfect, not much that we do can be, but they are a focus on that which is most important. death. by looking towards my end, i may realize the amount of time i have left, and what i can do with it. instead of dreaming about what i want to do as though there is infinite time, i may tune my life to the time that i have, making sure to live it well and do the most i can for others in that time. now that i’ve figured out the time i have left, and properly reassured myself of an inevitable death, what do i do? what are those thing that will form the bulk of my eulogy? the actions that may be spoken of? well, they likely won’t be too awesome, but i can make sure they’re good and a representation of who i was. notre dame’s center for career development says that these options should be framed around my values, interests, personality, and skills(vips). (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame ccdmoreau fye week 4) these certainly seem like a good starting point. by looking first at my values, i can eliminate those possibilities i may deem immoral, and focus on those that i find to be a good. then, looking at interests and personality, i pick out those options that i might enjoy and find wonder in. finally, my skills. even if i really like something, an essential part of a life well-lived is doing something good with it. in order to do this, i have to be skilled in the subject, or able to learn the skills necessary. putting all of these together, i may find those choices and paths in life that may https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ guide me in a life well-lived, and be written of in my eulogy for the good that i was able to do for others. so i’ve framed my life, figured out ways to work towards a life well-lived, and i’ve died. who’s going to write my eulogy? and are they a part of it? what effects did they have on my journey? will these reflect in my eulogy? i hope so. the friends, family, and love ones necessary to a life well-lived play a major role in the decisions i make, whether they be large or small. and it is only right that the writer of my eulogy comes from someone so close to me. in a conversation with my girlfriend, i was told that “i value the humanity of individuals and feel that many people do not get the respect they deserve.” (discernment conversation with kelsey goldwein moreau fye week 5) although i agree and think this to be true of myself, it is not a way in which i had viewed myself before. i’ve always wanted to help people, but never realized that i focus on the humanity of those i help and the voices of those unheard. this outside perspective that she gave goes right back around to the previously mentioned vips, directly affecting the choices i may from here on out, shaping my eulogy through the observations of someone close to me. looking at my life from a different perspective, what are those obstacles that i must overcome? surely anything of great difficulty will be mentioned in my eulogy, but are there obstacles that won’t be there? something that would go unnoticed if i don’t draw attention to it? yes. the biggest obstacle of my life, and also the one least likely to be mentioned in my eulogy, is myself. i get distracted, procrastinate, and act against my best interests all the time. my over thinking causes anxiety and stress, and i may develop poor coping mechanisms in response. this battle is one ongoing no matter the time of day, and it likely won’t end for the rest of my life, yet it is unseen to most, and with the current stigmas surrounding mental health, not likely to be mentioned in my eulogy, even if the writer knew about it. how, then, may i battle it? dr. kim, someone who has faced tremendous adversity in his life and managed to find joy and faith within it, says that in prayer he thinks about “what can [he] do in this moment? how can [he] use these five minutes?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6) these questions certainly won’t make my mental health better in an instant, but they provide a way of fighting it. they redirect a wandering mind from the struggles of life to the tasks at hand, to forging a life well-lived. in addition to battling these mental daemons with work towards a life well-lived, i may seek to ward them off through community. as already discussed, it is the friends, family, and loved ones necessary to a life-well lived that guide me in finding joy and fulfillment. fr. greg boyle wrote that “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract the mounting hopelessness, racism, and cultural disparagement that keeps us apart.” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7) in this way these people closest to me serve not only to guide me, but to build me up in joy, love, and community as well. truly, it is these relationships that are most important, and a eulogy is a reflection of that. although my eulogy will likely speak of things i’ve done on my own, it will likely, and hopefully, speak more so of what i’ve done for those in my community, what i’ve done with those closest to me. what i leave in this world is a memory of me in the hearts and minds of those i love, and a eulogy is simply a hopeful reflection of that. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815/download?download_frd=1 moreau fye mike capstone integration 4/23/22 october 12, 2002--present: the development of ’s faith, academics, family, and athletics as a man of faith, academics, family, and athletics, i strive to promote the well-being of all who i encounter. i try… as a brother in christ, i try to grow deeper in my faith with my fellow catholics. i try to embody the life of christ as much as i can, and help others do the same. when they fail, i help them get back on track; when i fail, i accept their embrace. i try to help the poor, just as jesus called us to do. i try not to judge others for their difference of opinions, and instead accept the diverse community that god created. i try to maintain a good relationship with god, never pushing him off for other things. as someone who enjoys growing in knowledge, i try to diversify my intellectual capabilities as much as i can. i try to learn about different cultures, languages, subjects, and areas of the world. i try to spread my knowledge to others so as to help them grow in perspective. i try to gain knowledge and experiences that will help me achieve my dreams. as a family man, i try to make the most of time spent with my family. i try to create new experiences with my family, so that we can recall the fun times we had. i try to help my family if they are in need because of the help they have given me. i try to make my family proud in my own, independent ways. i try to thank my family as often as i can. as a runner, i try to enjoy the beauty in the world. i try to maintain a constant speed, just as in life. i try to not get tired, although sometimes i do. i try to keep hydrated so that i may comfortably enjoy the rest of my run. i try to encourage others who are struggling through the marathon that life is. i try to keep a constant heart rate. i try, so that when it is all said and done, i can confidently say “i tried my best.” different people have very different opinions of others. my roommate has a different opinion of me than my mom, and my mom has a different opinion of me than my brother (discernment conversion activity moreau fye week five). not everyone sees all sides of me, but i am a shape with several different sides. throughout my entire life, i was surrounded by catholics. my dad was catholic, and many of my friends were, too. i never recognized what being catholic was until my junior year of high school. i was invited by one of my lifelong friends to a youth group. i accepted her invitation, but was hesitant. in short, this one trip turned into dozens of weekly prayer nights, many retreats, and an incredible group of friends. i specifically remember one retreat when all we did for a straight week was go to impoverished communities and serve them in some way. this service week stuck with me, and i have tried to implement it the best i can at notre dame. for example, i am an active member in tesol club. every few weeks, i go to english conversation tables, during which we help acclimate immigrants to their new community. many people need help, and do not always express it. “when challenges [for these immigrants] occur, as they always do, walking together, you’re less likely to be arrogant and think you have all the solutions” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). we are all human and need help in one way or another. notre dame has taught me that being a catholic means putting others before oneself, and rooting god in all that one does. although these immigrants are vastly different from myself, i try my best to understand where they are coming from, and the problems that they are having. i have made several deep connections with immigrants who regularly attend these conversation nights. it is incredibly heartwarming to see the progress that these people make week in and week out. although these people have undoubtedly gone through more struggles than i have, i avoid this fact by treating them for what they are: human beings. in accordance with serving others, i try to spread my knowledge to the best of my ability. as a prospective doctor, my future job will certainly involve making others feel comfortable about rather complex diseases, surgeries, etc. i have tried to develop my capacity for helping others in a health-related setting here at notre dame. so, i became involved with the brain exercise initiative, a national organization that desires to help keep the minds of elderly people sharp. i have made several trips to a local retirement home, where i run through various exercises with elderly people who are experiencing dementia. having had a line of family members develop alzheimer’s, this work was very personal to me. i am sure many elderly people feel lonely. jacob walsh described his experience with loneliness as a gay catholic (growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh moreau week ten). he highlighted the fact that it only takes one kind person to change the life of someone who is experiencing loneliness. although sometimes this work seems redundant and even useless at times, it may give an elderly person a great sense of joy. while it is sometimes difficult to find meaning in life, it can undoubtedly be given by strangers. repeatedly interacting with these eldery people and performing various activities with them may be the reason they smile that day. along with supporting strangers, i try to support my family. this past year has thrown my family for a loop: my dad finished a lawsuit from four years ago; we sold our house in the county after having it on the market for two years; we moved into a tiny apartment in the city; my grandma died 3 days before i came to college; we had a pet die; my family bought a house, had second doubts, and sold the house…twice. having moved to college, it was a lot harder to check up on my family members. but, checking up on them this past year was more important than ever. i needed to remember that “suffering is always a part of our life…it is how you handle it that counts” (5 minutes by grotto moreau fye week six). although i was busier than ever, i needed to make sure the people who supported me my entire life were happy. i call my mom, dad, brother, and grandma once a week, even if i am super busy. sometimes i am going through a rough patch, and sometimes one of my family members is going through a hard time. these calls are mutually beneficial, and make me even more grateful for my family when i am five hundred miles away. further, “suffering and death are facts of life. focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it, because we think that’s where we will find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week three). the struggle and happiness that life will undoubtedly consist of is part of what makes us stronger. this past year has proven to make my family tighter than ever. while balancing all of these important facets of my life, i need to create a life of balance. i need to recognize that i cannot do “it all.” moreover, i need to know when to further my faith family, serve strangers, help my family, and give myself a break. there are only twenty-four hours in a day, and a limited number of years that a person has. what one chooses to do in that time period is up to them. however, one needs to try to achieve a balance between one’s passions in life. while we are all very different, we can try to connect in one way or another. one may ask, “what do they care about that i care about that i can leverage to move them in my direction” (passion isn't enough by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). my year in college has helped me balance all of the important aspects of my life: classes, calling my friends and family, football games and tailgates, and my faith life. while it has been challenging at times, it has helped me discover more about myself and my priorities. specifically, i have come to realize that i can not work nonstop; i need time to rest, time to pray, and time to hang out with friends. i can be as successful as i want in my schoolwork. yet, that will get me nowhere if i am unhappy, and i have no genuine experiences, both with my friends and with god. notre dame has made god, knowledge, friends, and fun readily available to me. while i struggled to balance these in the first semester, i have grown to develop a sense of balance, which i am sure to use throughout the rest of my life. in conclusion, a life under the golden dome has guided me into a life of faith, academics, family, and athletics… “i am committed to doing three things to change this world for the better. please join me” (i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). as i continue throughout my college career, i hope to develop my cultural awareness through tesol; i hope to continue my passion for running and physical activity; i hope to further my relationship with god with my fellow duncan men; i hope to grow in knowledge so that i may use it to bring good health to my future patients; i hope to give back to my family in a meaningful way once i have a job, while also continuing my bond with them throughout my college years; i hope to strengthen my friendships in my dorm, classes, and throughout the campus community. in reflecting on all of these things, i recalled the balanced life as father hesburgh did. he changed the lives of all those around him in a meaningful, lasting way (hesburgh film by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). by bringing my passions to notre dame, and bringing notre dame into my passions, i hope to make a lasting impact on the notre dame community, as well as on the world. father hesburgh’s impact was not restricted to notre dame’s campus. rather, it’s heart was placed on notre dame’s campus, but his knowledge, love, kindness, and impact was spread throughout the world. the notre dame community, along with many others, are forever grateful for the lasting impact that father hesburgh left on the world. i too, hope to have this effect when it is all said and done nicholas dolphin feb. 24, 2022 moreau integration 3 ’s life well lived , growing up in the small town of dubuque, iowa, lived a very full life. a member of the wahlert catholic high school class of 2021, nick met his future wife at that school. after high school, he spent four years at his dream college of notre dame. he had the goal of attending this school ever since his father and grandfather took him to his first notre dame football game in first grade. both of those men would be proud to know that he would be a season ticket holder for 40 years after graduation. once undergrad was completed, nick went to carver medical school to get his m.d. degree. following this, he completed residency in downtown chicago before settling down as a cardiothoracic surgeon in his hometown. i would say that his education and career were his greatest accomplishments, but that claim would overlook the most fulfilling part of his life. nick left behind three kids and 12 grandkids, and family was undoubtedly the most important part of his life. besides chasing all of his children around, nick also enjoyed swimming, lifting, and watching his favorite teams– notre dame, the chicago bears,and the milwaukee bucks. what he enjoyed most, however, were his naps. he held some incredible sleeping powers, being able to take a three hour nap at 4:00 p.m. and still be ready for bed by 9:00. while nick had an impressive work ethic, nothing could come in between him and his sleep. if you were the one that got in the way of a good nap, look out, because you would hear about it for the next week. while kind-hearted, everyone knows nick had rough edges, which could be attributed primarily to his savage sarcasm. once you got to know him, however, his caring nature was easy to see. nick dedicated his work life to helping others, but it didn’t stop there. ever handy with the tools passed down to him by his grandpa callahan, he would travel to each of his children’s houses to fix anything from doorknobs to cars. grandkids would crowd around him and watch with awe, while he would pass down life lessons to them. whenever a job was taking longer than expected, his favorite saying was, “anything worth doing takes time and effort.” while nick is gone, he has left a lasting impression on this world, not only through his family but also in his numerous donations to the hospitals around dubuque. it is impossible to sum up a life filled with numerous accomplishments, but he has left a lasting impact on each and every one of us here today. with that, i thank nick for everything that he has done for us, and i wish him the best nap of his life. looking at my ideal life, i found that the topics discussed in moreau during the first half of the semester were a core part of how i wanted my life to be. while i include some topics in my daily life now, there's always room for growth and improvement. i specifically mention my love of naps in the eulogy. i am known for this even now, where instead of going out with friends, i will sleep almost 12 hours a night. this directly relates to the week 1 topic of slowing down our lives (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). napping is one way that i take time for myself. while it may seem like being lazy for some, this relaxing time helps me to compartmentalize what i need to do in the next half of the day. it also relieves stress and anxiety for a short amount of time, and that is something that i sorely need most days. also, it is a quiet time for me to self-reflect on what i have already accomplished during the day. my brain usually is always looking towards the future, but it is nice to acknowledge everything that i have already accomplished so i feel less overwhelmed. one way to judge having a life well-lived is through accomplishments. one of the biggest accomplishments of my life so far has been getting into notre dame. with this being said, i still have other major goals in mind, such as going to medical school and becoming a practicing doctor. while these goals are important, i must not forget about the day-to-day business that i need to take care of. i was reminded of this when i watched (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh, even when working on projects as big as the civil rights movement, still allowed time for students to come into his office and talk to him. likewise, as i continue with life, i can’t forget to attend to the small things, such as time with my children, as this is what truly makes a positive legacy. in my eulogy, i heavily discuss my education and profession. this alludes to father himes’ second key question, “are you good at your profession” (“three key questions' ' by father micheal himes moreau fye week three). in my time here at notre dame, i have noticed that i am not great at writing, and i am absolutely terrible at calculus, but biology courses come fairly easy to me. in this way, my career is directly related to something that i am good at, and this is why i mentioned becoming a doctor in my eulogy. during the fourth week of the moreau class, the topic of classes shifted to career talks. currently, it is my goal to become a doctor. with this, i am under a lot of stress in my classes. the meruelo family center for career development helped me understand that not everything is do or die as an undergrad (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). completing this activity helped me to realize that i still have time to change my mind about my career. so while right now i see myself becoming a doctor, i still have plenty of time to rewrite my eulogy so it fits exactly what i want in life. the fifth week of moreau brought to my attention that i thrive off of competition. i redid the conversation with my mother, but did not write down the answers to turn back in. in short, the one thing that stuck out to me was when she said i was most, “in the zone”. she said i was locked in during competition, whether it be for swimming or school (“discernment activity” by lisa dolphin moreau week five). not only was this competition aspect alluded to when talking about school in my eulogy, it also came out in the form of watching sports. as i get older, i hope to continue to feed my need for competition by staying in tune to many different sports teams. week six of moreau reminded me that there are going to be tough barriers in my life. luckily i have not yet encountered any life altering obstacles (“obstacles to a life well-lived” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). dr. kim in the “5 minutes” grotto video has encountered massive obstacles in his life when he lost mobility in his legs. this video showed me that no matter how difficult the obstacle is in life, there is always a lesson to be learned from it. this is why i included the quote, “anything worth doing takes time and effort.” life is messy, and i will not always be able to stay on my perfectly planned out path. by being prepared to dedicate time and effort to these obstacles, i will be able to overcome whatever is thrown my way. the most important thing in my life has been my relationships with others. friends and family have gotten me through hard times. they were the focal point of my eulogy, just like how i strive for my relationships to be the focal point of my life. i truly believe that judging a life well-lived off of relationships is extremely accurate (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). father boyle did not judge the gangs that he worked with on past actions, but on how they formed new relationships with him and others. this practice changed many of the gang members for the better. in the same way, i hope to have a positive impact on all whom i have a relationship with. while this is what i hope my eulogy will look like at the moment, there is still plenty of time for it to change and be added onto. and i hope plenty gets added to it because while this is a great life, there is still so much more that i want to experience. i know, however, that whatever i go on to do in life, as long as i keep the core value of relationships close to heart, i will have a life well-lived. from rain, comes rainbows moreau first year experience professor wagner 15 october 2021 from rain, comes rainbows root belief #1: i believe that i am here, at notre dame, for a reason. ` i believe that i am here for a reason. arriving at notre dame, i was under the impression that i was not good enough to be here. surrounded by some of the brightest minds in the world, i was afraid of what the future held, and fearful about being compared to these individuals. it takes me longer to understand certain subjects, like chemistry and calculus, than it does for other people, but i still try. i believe that this is why i belong, though. it's this effort, this perseverance, and this hope that i can overcome the mindset that i am not good enough to be here that in itself makes me suitable to attend notre dame. i was afraid to admit this fear to those around me however, as everyone seemed so self-assured. i remember the first friday in the beginning of the semester, when i dropped a class because i realized i would not have enough time to put in the effort and work that i knew it required. i felt like a failure. maryann, my r.a., noticed i was feeling down, and reached out. she has since become one of my most trusted friends at notre dame. yes, she is a senior, but she treats me as if i’m like any one of her other friends. i go to her when i need help, or when i simply just want to talk about the week’s events. thinking of this event reminds me that “vulnerability is the core of shame and fear and our struggle for worthiness but it appears that it’s also the birthplace of joy, creativity, belonging and love” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). this statement by brown reminds me that it's okay to open up to others. in fact, it is through this opening up to others that will make, and currently is making, my experience at notre dame memorable. it is necessary to let others in and let down my guard in order to truly grow within myself and connect to those around me. still, the process of letting go of my inner emotions and revealing them to those around me is frightening, especially when i don’t know how they’ll react. talking about this in moreau small groups comforted me, however, when i found out that many of my classmates felt the same way. there was a sense of belonging in this, too, as i realized i did not stand alone before this new journey. so, i do believe that i am at notre dame for a reason. while it is not clear to me what it is yet, being open to these new relationships, as well as embracing them, has helped me realize i do belong. it is ultimately up to me to discover my potential while i am here, but i recognize that i can’t do it alone. root belief #2: i believe that i am growing into my most authentic self through embracing my innate curiosity. a few weeks ago, i learned that my top 5 traits were kindness, perspective, love, curiosity and appreciation of beauty and excellence (“via character strengths survey” by via adult survey moreau fye week two) . i wasn’t surprised by the curiosity trait, as i believe that my innate curiosity has always driven me to never stop asking questions, even when given an easy answer. i have always sought to understand the deeper, underlying tones of whatever was around me, whether it be the reason behind the changing of seasons, or how rainbows could appear after it rained. i remember asking my father this question as a six year old. he didn’t realize that my knowledge was limited, however, and went on a tangent about how https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.viacharacter.org/survey/account/register light is refracted from water droplets and our ability to see it depends on if we are viewing it from a certain angle. i accepted this as true; in my eyes, my father was always right. in my young mind though, the connection was simple: from rain, come rainbows. as i grew older, i began to question even my father’s explanations. an intelligent man, i challenge his knowledge with questions that take him to the central point of the explanation. he still never fails to give me an answer. he jokes about how he misses when i would just ask about rainbows, saying it was easier on his mind. i began to ask myself the hard questions, including 'what do i really want to do with my life?’ and ‘what brings me joy?’ i’m still searching for the answers to these questions, as they aren't something that i can just be given an answer to. the answers to these lie deep within me, and i’m still on the hunt to figure them out. for years, i’ve struggled to find my passion. it wasn’t until a recent meeting with my advisor, deacon mel tardy, that i truly started to think about dentistry or orthodontics as a career choice. i enjoy working with my hands, creating things, and putting my own personal spin on whatever i do, and learned that dentistry, especially a dds program, would allow me to do just that. i don’t need the answer right now, though. i’m enjoying the ride, learning more about myself and my passions everyday. maybe i’ll take a ceramics class next semester, working with my hands and creating things unique to myself. i like to think of it like finding a rainbow after it rains. except i’m in the rain right now, and i’m still searching for that rainbow. my biggest challenge, i think, is going to be forging my own path. i know that my parents and family will support me in whatever i do, but i still feel guilty about wanting to follow my passions. i think this is because, like brooks explains, “we live in perpetual self confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks ted moreau fye week two). i want to be successful, but that should not be the ultimate goal. like brooks's reflection focused on, i think ultimately it doesn't matter how successful, how powerful, or how wealthy i am. after all, it's not my profession that will be remembered, but rather my character and kindness towards others. so, by embracing my innate curiosity, i am acting upon my character rather than the drive for success and wealth. i don’t care about the money, or the fame; i just want to live a life where i’m excited to go to work in the morning, i am happy with the person i am becoming, and where i can truly be my most authentic self. in other words, i want to find my rainbow. root belief #3: i believe that i encounter god in my everyday life. i grew up attending catholic schools, and so i’m well versed in bible stories and catholic traditions. many times, however, it has felt like i was just going through the motions, never truly searching to deepen my connection with christ. i knew that notre dame would help me grow in my faith, and ever since i’ve been here it has done just that. i remember professor fagerberg mentioning that “god can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of god, [and] every joy and sorrow can become a prayer” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg, grotto moreau fye week three). it was this that transformed the way i thought about god. i began to train myself to seek to see god in every person i encounter, even if i don’t necessarily get along with them at first. i began to look for him in the campus: the squirrels scurrying up the trees, the hues of the sky just before the sun sets, and the flickering of https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/ the candles in the grotto. most importantly, i began to realize that god wasn’t responsible for my inconveniences, but rather was there to carry me through them instead. i like to believe that my relationship with god is dependent on myself and what makes me feel connected to him. i remember talking about this with one of my classmates in moreau; we both seemed to have struggled with our relationship with god in the past, but have each found new, meaningful ways to connect with him again on our own terms. so, i do believe that i encounter god in my everyday life. i see him in my friends who knock on my door to give me cookies when i’m sad. i see him in the changing of the leaves as fall approaches. most importantly, i know he is there in my times of need, even if i can’t see him. i don’t think god judges us based on our attendance to mass. i think that he judges us on our acceptance of him into our hearts, on our treatment of those who are different from us, on our willingness to be open to encounter him. so yes, i do believe that i encounter god in my everyday life, no matter where i am, and even if i can’t directly see him. root belief #4: i believe that i deserve to be loved and cherished. i believe that i deserve to be loved and cherished. i don’t mean this is a way where i should be praised or worshipped, but rather in the sense that i deserve to be given the same time and effort that i give others. it took me a while to realize this, and i attribute this to my middle school experience, where i was ignored when i spoke, ridiculed behind my back, and sheltered from group events. i only had one real friend in middle school, who i’m still friends with to this day. angie, with the exception of my parents, was the only one who truly cared about me and made me feel loved and cherished. angie always invited me, never ridiculed me, and listened when i spoke. before i left for college, angie gave me a sign that said: life is tough, but so are you. i read it whenever i want to give up. week 4 of moreau touched upon life-giving relationships, and i remember picking a quote which explained that “the best kind of friendship are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor, grotto moreau fye week four). i recognized that this is indeed what i had with angie, who has always reminded me that i deserve to be loved and cherished. entering college, i was scared that i would have trouble making new friends and would be unable to forge life-giving relationships like this one. speaking about this in moreau small groups, i soon realized that almost everyone had this fear. we came to an agreement that in order to truly form a life-giving relationship, both people have to want to put in effort. this, of course, is always easier said than done, and i am still learning when to hold on and when to let go, especially with friends from home who i no longer talk to as much. however, on the bright side, while it has only been 2 months, i have met some amazing people who have amazing hearts and who, like angie, genuinely want to listen to me. my friend spencer, who is flaherty with me, is one of the sweetest people i’ve met, and never fails to leave me with a smile on my face. i consider her to be an example of one of these healthy relationships, just like the one i have with angie. https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ root belief #5: i believe that i am facing my fear of the unknown. i’ve always been scared of the unknown, as change has never been easy for me. i’m a person who likes to know what's happening and when it's happening. i remember during week 5 of moreau, we learned about father sorin’s journey to notre dame in the cold of 1842. i remember questioning how he could be so brave in the face of the unknown. this prompted me to question how i myself could find strength to embark on new journeys in the face of hardships, even when i’m unaware of what lies ahead. as the school year progressed, i realized that i had been doing just that. every day, i go to class where i learn new material, meet new people, and encounter new experiences, and every day, it gets a little bit easier. granted, the classes are hard, i’m afraid people will judge me, and some of the experiences i’ve had here haven't been the best. still, i choose to recall that “fear has no place in your success equation” (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). i know that harris, an inspiring figure who has climbed her way to success, is right. being fearful and never trying won’t get me anywhere in life. however, i can confidently say that i am trying to overcome my fear of failure, my fear of the unknown, and the fear of never being good enough, and that's the best i can do at this moment. narratives, like that of carla harris’s rise to success and father sorin’s journey to notre dame have helped me realize the importance of overcoming my fears. they provide an example of people who have faced struggle head on, and have not turned their backs to the challenge. they give me hope, reminding me that if i really want something, i too can achieve it if i put in the work. i know notre dame will help guide me as i face my fear because, as father kevin grove reminds me, “notre dame will be there for [me] because [they] believe that there is no failure that grace cannot transfigure into a blessing (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c moreau fye week five). i’ve recognized this in the community at my dorm, where all the girls have each other's backs, and in my classes, where my teachers care about my well-being both as an individual and as a student. so, i’m currently facing my fear of the unknown, as i don't know what the next four years hold. i know that whatever happens, though, i will be supported. root belief #6: i believe that i am influenced by the people closest to me. i believe that i’m influenced by the people closest to me because i have adopted many of their habits, traits and ideas. for example, i always cover my eyes with my hand while watching a horror movie; it's something my mom has always done. i say “sassy” and “bae,” almost unironically, everyday; they are my best friends' key catchphrases. i pick at the hairs on my arm when i’m nervous; my dad would do this whenever he was stressed. while i am my own, unique person, these are noticeable aspects of who i am that have been derived from others. in a way, people get a glimpse of them through me, even if they do not know them. i realized that out of all my life experiences, the places i’ve visited, the things i’ve tried, the one thing that i majorly focus on in my “where i’m from” poem was the people in my life. this poem allowed me to https://news.nd.edu/news/carla-harris-2021-laetare-address/ https://news.nd.edu/news/carla-harris-2021-laetare-address/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 point out what was important to me, inviting me to just free-write my response, as “no one else sees the world as [i] do” (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). discussing our poems in class allowed me to see just how different and unique everyone is. one boy in my group focused heavily on the area he was from, describing the mountains and the adventures he’d go on with his friends. alex, however, focused on how theater played a big role in who he has become. i realized we all have our own stories that shape who we are and what we are becoming. for me, the people in my life have shaped who i am, and the new people i meet in college are sure to shape who i am becoming. i think there's a beauty in the fact that others can see my loved ones in how i act and what i do. it’s like they’re a part of me and present with me even if they aren’t there physically. root belief #7: i believe that i actively try to look beyond initial impressions. when i was ten, i played on a basketball team with a girl who never stayed at the same hotel as the rest of the team during travel tournaments. i remember talking with the other girls on our team, judging her because we thought that she did not want to be an active member of the team. i remember the look of shock on my mother’s face when i made a comment like this to her. disappointed in me, she explained that it was because this girl could not afford to stay in these hotels, and that in fact she probably wouldn't play the next year because her family was going through financial difficulties. i had failed to ask the extra question, looking at the situation from only one perspective. i felt terrible, and as a result, have tried to actively work on this throughout the course of my life. i used to attend a small, all-girl high school, and everyone was nice because we knew each other. coming to notre dame, i was introduced to a variety of new people, many who i did not know, and many who seemed very different from me. i was placed in a dorm with a sweet girl, whose only flaw is that she is messy, constantly leaving clothes on the floor and dishes in the sink. at first, i was angry, confused as to how she could just leave things in a mess. however, i tried to ask just one more question, because the issue with my assumptions was “not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete. they make one story become the only story” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). following adichie’s advice, i tried to look at it from a different perspective, rather than sticking to the single story that existed in my mind. maybe she was stressed with school and didn't have time to clean up. maybe it's her first time living on her own. i can’t judge her for what i do not know; after all, who am i to judge? i myself am not perfect, nor is anyone for that matter. tying this into our moreau class, it was interesting to see people’s different perspectives on certain topics, such as socioeconomic status, religion/ faith and nationality. many of my classmates had different views on these topics, views that would have probably never been revealed to us if not asked. it goes to show that if we only dig a little deeper, we can uncover a world of unknowns. so, i believe that i am actively trying to look beyond initial impressions. it's something i do everyday, whether it's correcting a mean thought in my mind or reminding myself that there is always another side to the story. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story who needs to live a life well lived? over the course of this second semester, we had many activities in moreau class for the purpose of defining a life well lived, as well as developing our own personal mission statements. in the first week we practiced self reflection, a skill that was beneficial for all future moreau assignments. in the article for the first week author pico lyer said, “whenever i finally force myself away from my desk for a day, of course, i find the opposite: the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico lyer, moreau fys week 1) lyer discusses how while in the past information gathering was a valuable skill, while nowadays, due to the internet, it’s more valuable to be able to sift through information than gather it. lyer also mentions their personal experience saying: “the more time i spend away from my work, the better the work will be, most often.” it reminds me of when i was in high school and would talk to my friends. some people would say they spent hours doing an assignment that others would hardly spend any time on and usually the students who spent less time did better. i think part of this (based on my own experiences) is because the shorter sessions are more focused and don’t involve any distractions. last semester i had a theology assignment where i spent days procrastinating on a paper, only to write the same paper in half an hour after sitting down, having someone hold me accountable, and just focusing on really writing. i also had a similar experience this easter break where i procrastinated sending three emails that ended up taking a collective twenty minutes to complete. over the next couple weeks, we explored the concepts of a life well lived. we talked about inspirations of a life well lived, and watched hesbugh, a documentary about fr. hesburgh and how he brought together the notre dame community. (“hesburgh” moreau fys week 2) one main idea from the documentary was that of bridging the gap between communities to do good. it reminded me of inspirations in my own life, like my father, and how his leadership has influenced me. the following week, we discussed questions that guide a life well lived. in his article, three key questions fr. himes defines three questions of a life well-lived: “is this a source of joy?”, “is this something that taps into your talents and gifts and uses them in the fullest way possible?”, and “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large” (“three key questions” by father himes, moeau fys week 3) during the week we did it, i didn’t give fr. himes’ questions too much thought in application to my life specifically and more talked in general cases. but his questions do pose a possible answer for whether or not i should do rotc for the entirety of my college career, a question i’ve been mulling over for a while now. in weeks four and five, we talked about future career choices, and took a couple of career tests. the vips (values interests personality skills) seemed interesting to me. i’d say that was a good tool to determine how we can navigate getting our first job / how to determine what we would want to do in our futures. (“7 clues” moreau fys week 4) i personally found week 5 more insightful, specifically the (conversation discernment activity moreau, fys week 5) talking with my friends and family about how i seem to be. getting an outside perspective not only shone some light on aspects of myself that i had seldomly thought about, but also showed me explicitly, in words, actions that i had taken in the past and the values that could be behind them. it showed how i value not only my, but other peoples’ physical and mental health, acceptance and inclusion, considering all aspects of issues, and helping others. in weeks six and seven, we continued to talk about, and define a life well lived. in week 6, we discussed obstacles to a life well lived. one important point from that week was “asking what instead of why” a technique that was recommended in “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s.a wrong way) (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s.a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, moreau fys week 6) the video “5 minutes” was also interesting. i agree with it’s message that gratitude is really important. you can greatly affect how you view almost everything that happens around you by having a different mindset. it might be easier to be frustrated, or to point fingers and place blame on yourself or others, but i’ve found that in the long run i am a lot happier if i focus more on solutions and looking on the bright side. i found that this also applies to relationships, recognising that they change and how people can grow together or apart over time, despite differences. being grateful for the people around you and telling them as such, was a message that was communicated in the reading for week seven. (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” fr. greg boyle, moreau, fys week 7) after the first integration, we moved away from a life well lived, and began to engage in engaging with the challenges of the world around us and formulating our missions statements. we discussed the idea of embracing other people through the idea of accompaniment. "i'll go with you and support you on your journey wherever it leads; i'll share your fate for a while. and by 'a while,' i don't mean a little while." accompaniment is about sticking with a task until it's deemed completed, not by the accompanier but by the person being accompanied. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” professor steve reifenberg, moreau, fys week 9) in week 12, dean g. marcus cole’s call to action tells readers “i am committed to doing three things to change this world for the better. please join me. what three things can you do to make this world a better place? how can i help you?” (‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something’ by dean g. marcus cole, moreau fys week 12) while i don’t have a checklist of three or however many things to accomplish to make the world a better place, i do want to help people, and i do want to be fulfilled not only at the end of my life, but throughout it as well. since the week when we initially read it, i’ve grown more skeptical about the article we read in week 10 (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, moreau fys week 10) in which the author describes how he agreed with the church’s teachings on gay marraige. it seemed like a very notre dame article to have us read. not one that could open the eyes of the much more common catholic members of our community, but to attempt to shine a catholic light on the lgbtq+ community. i’m fairly certain that the more conservative students reading the article aren’t going to learn anything new from the article, nor are they going to realize that telling people struggling with their identity or sexuality that they’re going to burn in hell for eternity comes off as harmful and hateful, despite their intentions of ‘guiding them to salvation’. this fact became even more clear after reading the university’s mission statement. (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fys week 13) it might be easy to say, well that doesn’t happen, or people who truly follow the lord wouldn’t do something like that, those people are just hateful bigots. but that’s missing the point. by perpetuating these ideas and being so resistant to change, people can sit comfortably in their echo chambers and will lash out and express hate towards anyone who doesn’t share that belief on other peoples’ identities and other peoples’ happiness. (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fys week 11) what’s worse is that there are children whose parents or guardians are in these echo chambers, they’re forced to suffer because they are dependent on their parents to survive. i get that we’re a catholic university, and the church or the gospel says whatever, but if we want to develop our students into people who can not only achieve a life well lived for themselves, but to help those around them and their children achieve a life well lived as well, we can’t shoehorn catholic beliefs into everything we do. we can present them as an option, but we can’t push anyone to choose them. or rather we shouldn’t, and yet we do. if i had to say ‘this is the issue that i’m going to tackle during my time at notre dame’, it’s probably this. it’s so tiring witnessing people suffer because others with power over them are so hellbent on preventing other people from being happy. god forbid we laugh a little, god forbid we love a little. we talk so much about living a life well lived ourselves, what about letting other people live a life well lived? other people who might not have had such a curriculum to help them understand the world and themselves. other people who will inherit this earth from us. these are people who need to live a life well lived. not just us. not just notre dame. if we want to make the world a better place, everyone should have the opportunity and support to live a life well lived. thomas toole taylor kelly moreau final integration 28 april 2022 the path to living the life i want to live i am a person who values helping others and improving myself and those who i love around me. i am always willing to help anyone in a time of need and distress, or give someone praise when things are going well. i want to pursue a life of service to others. i was shaped by my parents’ divorce, as i needed to embrace and develop these qualities further in a time when my family needed me to do so. i am striving in my own life to improve my skills of communication and time management. coming to college has helped me gain perspective on the lives of others as i am integrated into a community where i spend a lot of time with people of different backgrounds than people i spent time with at home. i am learning to not judge others based on things i hear that he perceives to be crass and give people chances. i am always looking for ways to be more courageous and not be afraid of what could happen if i take a risk and it doesn’t work out. i find myself avoiding potential situations of conflict and trying to smooth things over when they should be addressed head on. college is teaching me the importance of working hard in everything i do. i plan on improving my knowledge in academics and human pursuits. i want to pursue a fulfilling life in spiritual, familial, and professional ways and i am striving to be the best person i can be (personal mission statement moreau week 13). the opening to my mission statement, where i discuss my passion for helping and accompanying others is something that i will take to the notre dame community over the next three years. i often see a lot of division in social circles at notre dame (racially, socioeconomically, etc.), and i want to be a part of ending that. “somewhere, in the jurisdictional locale where judgment used to claim us, a remarkable commonality rushes in, and the barriers that exclude are dismantled” (jurisdiction by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). i often see this judgment and exclusion in social settings at notre dame, which leads me to believe that one of the most important things i can do is increase my jurisdiction to set an example for others and contribute to bridging the gap between different groups in the community. groups need to be more inclusive at nd so we can create a community where we are all accepted and loved by those who look like us and those who don’t. "i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other" (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). in a place like the gateway program, it is especially easy to recognize this racial division and fear. we have zero black students in our program, and there are plenty of remarks and sentiments about people of other races heard. through being more inclusive and communicating with other people of different races, i will live out my mission statement and set an example for inclusion to other gateways. part of my mission that also involves extending my circle as a former gateway student is avoiding the echo chamber that can be created through the small community. the lack of diversity we have right now in gateway forms a space where we hear opinions and stories very similar to our own. this creates a pattern where we are complacent with our status and forget about the struggles of others. “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). within my own group and within gateway as a whole, we find common opinions and we (including myself) are reluctant to speak up against the majority of opinion. i need to do a better job of helping others to feel confident in speaking their views which take into account the situations of marginal groups. part of my mission is to become more courageous, and i can take the small step of speaking up and standing up for others, even if they aren’t represented in the conversation. i also plan on helping my current peers and those who i meet when they are struggling. whether it be academically or personally, i don’t want anyone to be left behind. in a competitive academic environment like college, some of my friends have felt alone and helpless. i need to do a better job of being a friend in any situation. this quote from fr. hesburgh resonates with me because it stresses the importance of helping others who are down. “well of course we could all do better if we worked harder, but it’s like holding a man underwater and saying ‘why don’t you swim?’” (hesburgh produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). i will be able to provide assistance to those who need help through becoming a part of service groups (which i will elaborate on further into the essay), but i also want to be a person to rely on for my close friends. we have all had times where we feel like we are slipping and there is no way to climb back up. by looking out for my friends, i can help foster a more supportive community through my next three years at notre dame. i have discussed how i need to live out my mission by setting an example for other gateway students and helping enhance the perspectives within our smaller group at the big university. another part of my mission is actually expanding my jurisdiction and accompanying others. ‘“some people are happy only if they are helping,” he added. “this is a question of friendship you must learn to be beside, walking with another person”’ (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i need to expand my horizons and accompany others through joining clubs that will allow me to accompany those who are struggling. i plan on joining the boys and girls club volunteers and the special olympics club to accompany those so i can better understand their struggles and be a true friend to them. i need to take the risk of accompanying others, and joining these groups will help me to do my job as a servant leader. “there is no point where you can say, “the issue of my calling is settled.” vocations lead to vocations! it may raise other questions, and there’s no point where you can say that, “i do not have to ask any more questions” (three key questions by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). these new vocations that i intend to pursue should help me develop more and more connections, which will present more ways that i can accompany others. at a larger university, there will be plenty more avenues for me to serve, and joining service clubs is my first step. once i become a part of an organization that i feel devoted to, i will be my best self because of my love for contributing to something that i feel is bigger than myself. i find a sense of purpose when i am a member of a group that i care about. i don’t necessarily have to be the leader of the group, but i feel an extreme sense of accomplishment and purpose when i have a role that helps achieve a goal. in a conversation with my dad about when i am at my best, he mentioned my role as a bench player on my state championship basketball team. although i rarely played, i fulfilled my role to the best of my ability which helped my team win the state championship. i was the biggest cheerleader during games and in practice i gave my full effort to prepare our starters for the games. i love having a role in something that i consider important, and joining a service organization can become my new basketball team (conversation with my dad moreau fye week 5). another part of my mission that i can further pursue through the next three years is learning how to succeed academically. i find myself stressing often, and improving my time management would help me to eliminate that problem and further my growth as a student and person. i plan to set aside time to sit and think, without feeling overwhelmed like i need to do something or that i’m wasting my time. setting up times for me to do work, exercise, and have free time will help me be more put together and confident in myself and my effort in school. “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer moreau fye week 1). sometimes, i feel like everything is coming at me so fast. if i become more calculated with how i allocate my time towards different things in my life, i will be more successful. at notre dame, my academic workload will increase, so i need to be diligent in actually sticking with this plan so i am not overwhelmed by my heightened responsibilities. the source of everything that i have talked about so far in this integration is god. i have loved my faith experiences at school so far, and i want to expand this crucial part of my mission statement at notre dame over the next three years. when i am struggling with school and overwhelmed with a grade or i feel like i am not smart enough, i need to do a better job of remembering that god is there for me and i can always call on him in prayer. “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). struggles in school can make me feel alone, especially when i am not near my family. i need to set aside time to pray everyday and continue to attend sunday mass. god is the light and he can always show me what i need to do and give me the strength to achieve my goals when times are hard. being too hard on myself is an issue that i need to overcome if i want to be successful at notre dame. if i keep my promise of calling on god, he will give me the strength i need to realize that i don’t need to dwell on my failures or worry what will happen if i don’t do well enough. this quote reflects the idea that too much self-reflection can be harmful. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i don’t have to over-criticize myself if i lean on god to give me the strength to overcome adversity. i find myself in difficult situations when i try to rely only on myself, and forget who the most important person in my life truly is. ensuring that i live my life in the way god wants me to and sticking to a schedule of worship and prayer shouldn’t only help me succeed academically but internally and in relationships that i build through the rest of my time in south bend. finally, the last part of my mission statement that i am going to address is wanting to pursue the best future i can professionally. i need to do a better job of accessing the career resources available to me so i can ensure that what i am getting into is what i want to do. sometimes i am scared of these conversations because i don’t know the answers to all of my questions. i need to be less afraid of taking risks and put myself out there in the search for what i want to do for the rest of my life. in moreau week 4, we took career surveys and read about the career search opportunities here at notre dame. this quote is something that should become a motto for me as i grow at nd. “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). i plan on pursuing opportunities presented to me to secure an internship for the summer after my sophomore year and line up a job before i leave notre dame. my career is something that can feel daunting, but i need to overcome that fear and take risks to discern what my passions and values are in the workforce. my mission statement is a paragraph that tries to encapsulate who i am and what i love. does it include everything? of course not. however, it is a useful tool for remembering who i am and what i am here at the university to do. this integration has helped me to line up a plan of steps i can take to live out the life that i intend to live. i need to continue reflecting on this statement and my values throughout my life to be the person that i want to be. if i uphold the values that i state in my mission statement through taking the steps i lay out in this integration, i will be extremely satisfied with my time at notre dame and onto the rest of my life. moreau week 1 searching for belonging moreau 8/25/2021 week 1 searching for belonging the second course learning objective “define beliefs and values” stands out as the most relevant in my life. i have been fortunate to have had a variety of life experiences, subsequently causing me to meet a variety of people. these people have caused me to challenge both my beliefs and values. from a conservative, suburban, catholic middle school to a largely jewish, rich, liberal, and urban high school i have been forced to think about and defend my beliefs and what i value. the people i have surrounded myself with, both on my own and by chance, have helped me become the person i am today. i see the moreau class as another opportunity to do the same and help me further define and refine my values and beliefs. question: in my past experiences, the way i have defined my beliefs and values has been through the same beliefs and values being challenged and subsequently changing. my question is do you think beliefs and values can be refined without them being challenged? and what views or beliefs do you believe will never change no matter how many times they are challenged? quote: “they didn’t talk about vulnerability being comfortable, nor did they talk about it being excruciating [...] they talked about it being necessary” (brené brown) this quote represents one of the key points in dr. brown’s tedx talk. in this case, the people speaking already showed that they were comfortable with being vulnerable. these people did not shy away from vulnerability as most people do but rather embraced it. they did not look at it as something negative, like the people who were not comfortable with being vulnerable, but viewed it as a positive and good thing to be. i believe the most important part of the quote though is that they did not say that it is comfortable. one thing i picked up from the talk was that if vulnerability comes easy, it is not being done right. these people lived by that and found a balance between uncomfortable and pain. comment: i found dr. brown’s talk interesting, and i truly enjoyed the relevance the words have today over ten years later. while it was a mere side note in her discussion, she mentions how politics and religion have turned into certainty and not a discussion. since 2010 the discourse has only gotten worse which i found interesting. i also found how dr. brown’s life experiences shaped her understanding of vulnerability important. she came to the conclusion that living with vulnerability required her to stop controlling and predicting, which led to her “spiritual awakening.” for her to become vulnerable she had to be vulnerable with her therapist to understand her discovery. her experiences show the audience that becoming vulnerable is not as simple as just doing it, and it is a process. in my opinion, her openness about her experiences only added to her credibility when talking about vulnerability. it is easy for one to tell you to be vulnerable, but to actually talk to someone and get help to become it takes a lot more strength. i have had struggles with both vulnerability and reaching out for help and seeing her accomplishments while doing both gives me hope that i can do the same. moreau integration 2 the first thing i encountered when i came to notre dame was loneliness. it was my first time really leaving what i was familiar with and i don’t do well with change. the first week was incredibly tough for me. i was in a new place and i didn’t know anyone. i felt like my roommates weren’t what i expected them to be. just like in the “advice from a formerly lonely college student” i felt like no one else was feeling the way i was. i’m in a quad and my other three roommates seemed like best friends. they would go out together and study together and i was just on the outside. i wasn’t only seeing this at notre dame. everyone i know from high school looked like they were having the time of their lives on social media. was it only me who felt the way i did? but i wasn’t truly alone. other people were feeling the same way i was and everyone just wanted to make friends. i realize that people were only posting that way on social media because they felt alone too and wanted to pretend they weren’t. now, looking back on how i felt that first week, i still sympathize with how i felt, but i realize that it doesn’t matter now. now my roommates are my best friends. we do everything together and they’re who i lean on when i need support. feeling so lonely that first week of school, i never thought i would be friends with these three girls, but now i think we’re going to be friends for life. (advice from a formerly lonely college student) i’ve been lucky enough not to encounter brokenness so far in the form of heartbreak my first semester at notre dame. i am still friends with all my friends from high school and my boyfriend hasn’t broken up with me yet. but i know that i have definitely encountered brokenness in other ways. i’m not trying to sound ungrateful or negative in any way, but college classes have broken my spirit. i have always lived my life with little to no effort in school, but always coming out on top. i knew that when i started college i was going to have to put more effort in. this really hit me hard after my first test principles of microeconomics. it was the https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html first time i had ever failed a test. i knew i hadn’t studied hard enough and was ready to come back the next time. after that, i studied even harder for all my other tests. i know i’m not failing, but i feel like no matter how hard i work i’m not getting the grades i’m shooting for. i feel stupider than i’ve ever felt in my entire life. i feel like i’m never going to do well in college. i think i need to do some kintsugi. smashing something isn’t going to fix my grades or my broken spirit, but it sure will feel good. although i haven’t yet responded to this encounter, i am looking forward to overcoming it. i am planning on continuing to work hard throughout college to better my academic results. i’m sure if i work hard enough and find what fits me right i can achieve the standards i hold myself to. (women find healing through kintsugi workshop) since coming to notre dame, i have encountered a wonderful community. i have spent my whole life growing up around notre dame. although i live 3 hours away from campus, i found myself there quite often as a child. my family loves notre dame football (as any normal family should), but i never really understood what people meant by “the notre dame community.” since coming here, i’ve gotten to know what the community is really about. part of that is especially apparent at notre dame football games. football games have become such an important part of my life as a student. i never enjoyed watching football and i never thought going to a football game would be this exciting. being a student has definitely increased my love for notre dame football. like parker says in “thirteen ways of looking at community” community is a gift that we should be grateful for and i am incredibly grateful for the notre dame community. it’s the best community i’ve ever encountered. (13 ways of looking at community) one of my favorite encounters since coming to notre dame has been my encounter with faith. i have always had a strong faith. i grew up catholic, going to catholic schools, and https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ attending mass every sunday. i have always been a stronger believer in the catholic faith and that is one of the main reasons i chose notre dame. i was worried that notre dame wouldn’t be as faithful as i expected, that it would be more secular in an attempt to please the masses, but i was pleasantly surprised when i got here. faith is a huge part of notre dame and i’ve loved seeing it in so many different aspects of the notre dame community. of course, the most important part is mass. i was a little bit worried after my first experiences with farley mass because i wasn’t very pleased with it. i thought the turnout was disappointing and the homilies were long and boring. but then i went to dillon’s milkshake mass and realized maybe i was just looking for faith in the wrong places. i’ve since started going to mass at st. edwards hall every sunday and i absolutely love it. my favorite part is that i’ve gotten quite a few of my friends, who don’t normally go to mass, to go with me. it’s become a tradition that i can truly enjoy with my friends. and as made apparent in “holy cross and christian education” you don’t get that anywhere else but notre dame. and that’s why i love it here. (holy cross and christian education) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192591/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/25086/files/192591/download?download_frd=1 moreau integration iii march 4, 2022 “most of you knew as a coworker, friend, distant relative, or interplanetary icon, but i knew him as my dad. i’m his sixth kid, and he had three more after me, and so one would think that he either never got a moment alone or that we didn’t get much time with him. one would be wrong to think so. ask any one of his children and they’ll tell you that somehow my dad seemed to find thirty-six hours in the day. he was always deeply interested in our lives and always active in them, going to school plays and football games while all the while keeping prayer and reflection central to his life[footnoteref:1] so that he could always be calm and collected. he would unplug himself from email after business hours, refusing to, as he was fond of putting it, act as a router made of meat. he didn’t want to waste his limited time on earth forwarding emails. [1: why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer – moreau week one ] “my dad was always aware of his mortality. he kept it on the forefront of his mind at all times. far from being morbid, this was freeing: he learned to let go of the little things and live his life to the fullest.[footnoteref:2] this also made my job as eulogist and funeral organizer far easier – he laid out fairly specific instructions for what to do after his death. as per his request, the funeral is in the notre dame basilica with extra seating for the thousands of attendees and livestreamed to his fans. i believe he hoped to replicate fr. hesburgh’s funeral that took place here 70 years ago. he always looked up to fr. hesburgh’s legacy, despite never having met him, but he always told me that when he had gone to notre dame you could still feel the echoes of that great figure in the school administration. people sought to imitate a man who had stood up against injustice while never compromising his faith.[footnoteref:3] [2: meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die, ruth graham, moreau week three ] [3: "hesburgh", jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau week two ] “also per his request, at the funeral reception there will be a gameshow called “who said it? or ron swanson?” contestants will have to identify phrases such as “i have my gold buried in various deposits around notre dame” as being an original quote from my father or an altered quote from ron swanson, who i understand was a character on a popular show from my father’s childhood. the winner gets my dad’s vintage 2025 ford f-150 lightning, valued at a13,000,000. “as should be clear from the game if it wasn’t before, my father loved mirth and he loved people. to quote one of the popes from his childhood, pope francis, “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.[footnoteref:4]” i think my dad really took that to heart despite the source. he would never in a million years dream of a life without other people. my mom always said that my father was planning his future family and what he wanted his life to look like long before she met him in college. he didn’t know what career he would have yet or that he would become the first person to have their net worth break over ƀ20,000,000, and at the time he planned on being either a math professor or a wall street quantitative analyst. he had three key questions in mind when deciding what he would do[footnoteref:5]. for him, these questions were “what are you good at,” “what do you like doing,” and “what does the world need more of?” these questions guided him in his eventual decision to become grand emperor of mars. [4: why the only future worth building includes everyone, pope francis, moreau week seven ] [5: navigating your career journey, meruelo center, moreau week four ] “even more than what career he would have, my father cared about what friends he would have. his close friend of 80 years, j.a. hatch, is in the audience with his wife, whom my father introduced to j.a against his will. my father was godparent to all seven of his children as well as being both his best man and all three groomsmen. j.a. was one of the key figures in helping my dad realize his vocation to be a benevolent despot. they had a conversation once in freshman year[footnoteref:6] in which j.a. and my dad commented on my dad’s exuberance, extraversion, and eagerness to change the world. the answer then became obvious – rule people for their own good, and maybe make some money along the way. [6: week five discernment activity, j.a. hatch and , moreau week five ] “my father was never a very introspective person. while others espoused introspection as a method for arriving at enlightenment,[footnoteref:7] he found constant navel-gazing to be a distraction from work and often a way to shift blame. it was, in his opinion, far more useful to simply say “i messed up, won’t happen again” than to spend countless hours finding out why he had failed. he always said that personal faults boil down to a lack of willpower. [7: the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, moreau week six ] “i’m sure if my father were here he would thank each of you for coming. i know that most of you had to commute via rocket and that’s never particularly fun. please join us in celebrating his life in two hours as we eat, play games, drink, and most importantly fire his corpse into space. it’s what he would have wanted.” he descended the steps, opened up the casket, and placed inside ita six pack containing five full beers and one empty, just to mess with future archaeologists. 3/4/2022 “started from the bottom, now we here “ so, this is where it has ended. while i might not have done all the things i wanted to do in my life, i lived a life in which i have no regrets in, which i think is worth something. i tried to give back to the people around me, and i hope that in the end i was able to leave an impact on those around me. the path i have travelled was the one less travelled on, but i was able to see things that no one else has seen before, things that were shaped to fit my own perceptions. i think that in a unique way to myself i have lived well, following the beliefs that i formed throughout my entire life. those three questions i learned in notre dame, “is this a source of joy, is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible, is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). thinking about it now, a lot of the things i have done follows the criteria set by those questions, no wonder i don’t feel any regrets as i die. i feel like the point i would say completely changed the way i saw things was when my scientific research teacher after reviewing me and my partners poster board with him, he levied some of the harshest criticism that i have ever had on any piece of work. after that, it made me rethink the way i did things, as before that i only did things to get a grade or accomplishment rather than being fulfilled by the things i do. i slightly remember this being one of the main subjects of the conversation i had to do for moreau, i did it with tito too (“week five discernment conversation activity” by me moreau fye week five). hah, funny how that’s one of the things i remember as i die. i feel like this is the moment that ended up making me love research and the sciences in general, i also wanted to become a doctor because of him in the end, he ended up being my favorite teacher in the end too. the most important thing was that i found out what brought me joy to do, while also finding the perfect career at would allow me to do the things i enjoy while maximizing the amount of people i help in the process. i remember a lot of the hardship that i encountered throughout the years to come after this, covid 19 virtually cutting my highschool years short, which also inadvertently ruined the research program at my school as we were not able to obtain funding anymore. makes me recall the story of jd kim, the fact that he thought he ruined his life, on the verge of suicide yet still came out of that time on top was really inspiring for me during my time there, since i had to continue the tough road i laid out for myself (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six ). still, even with those hardships, many good things came out of that time too, one of them being me getting into notre dame, which is where i learned a lot about how to redefine what a “life well lived “is, they called it. it is something that was brought up a lot during my time there, from my philosophy classes to moreau, that concept was brought up to me all the time. i would like to feel as though i accomplished what i think that concept means to me. i remember when we had to do career discernment activities during moreau, which was not useful for me as i already knew what i wanted to do, but i feel like during that time, it gave me the courage to push through the hard road that would surely be ahead of college (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week fourth). i wanted to live my versions of the life “well lived “and to do that i needed to become a doctor, that’s what i wanted to do, which helped me a lot during the arduous years that were medical school and then residency that followed, now those were times in which i almost gave up, but i pushed on. the most important part about all this, was that i was able to accomplish my goals with the people i cared about around me. i always thought about being alone at the time in which i died, i thought living a life well lived revolved around the concept of leaving an impact of your own, in a unique way only you can do. maybe these thoughts helped me stay on track living a good life. but looking at me now, it seems those thoughts were unfounded. i don’t think that living a good life can happen if you end that life alone. “the future is made of you’d, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pop francis moreau fye week seven) said by pope francis himself, i agree with this statement, especially now that i have lived through life long enough to give my own opinion on it. it is only because of these people, that i was able to finish medical school, become a neurologist and continue my research on the brain as i saved countless lives. i can only die without regrets. life itself for me felt so fast, as i was in school for 1/3 of my life and the rest was hectic, as i was always in the hospital. i like the fact that as life went on, it got less and less hectic, giving me more time to reflect on the events that got me to where i found myself, a skill i learned in the first week of moreau. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture”. (“ why we need to slow down our lives ” by pico lyermoreau fye week one). how many times i was able to this in my life i can count on my fingers, a testament to how fast life can go. but i think that i still made it out well, considering at this point i have no regrets, and i think that the way people will remember me is one that i am completely satisfied with. as i lay here on my deathbed, i remember the time we talked about father hesburgh, someone who has had an impact on so many things, my alma mater, civil rights, women equality. he was a sort of enigma, an anomaly in the world who was apart of everything. while i had my triumphant victories, i also had my failures, but both of these aspects of my life are indeed the story of my life as “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one does not speak of human failings as well as human successes ”, (“ hesburgh ” by jerry barca and christine o malley moreau fye week two) said in the hesburgh documentary. at my last chapter, i think i was able to live my life the way i wanted to, while living one that helped the people around me. i have absolutely no regrets, and in that essence, i am happy with my death. i don’t want to leave the people i love behind, but i know i will always be in their hearts, and that fact gives me solace. i am happy at the end, and i think i am ready to depart from this world. moreau integration 2 ms. thigpen moreau 3 december 2021 centered in hope during my first semester at notre dame, i’ve encountered my own unrealistic expectations and learned to revise them, impending brokenness or stress that i have learned how to heal, different forms of leadership and new mentors whom i look up to, and periods of both doubt and strength and ways to cope with these while staying true to myself. throughout my life, i’ve succeeded in the classroom, in sports, and in club leadership roles by setting high expectations and goals for myself, delegating where necessary and expected, and doing even those tasks which aren’t required but i expect myself to complete. it would be remiss of me not to recognize that i have the determination to reach for these expectations and goals because i have the passion to pursue them. even so, thus is the nature of expectations: sometimes they’re good for us—they help us to learn good values and habits to fall back on when we’re going through difficult times, they help us to develop goals and work towards them, and more. but what if these expectations aren’t realistic? it’s possible that they could do more harm than good. instead of defining my expectations according to my dreams and identities, all too often i find myself letting expectations define me instead. when we can’t meet these unrealistic expectations, we fall into feeling the effects of imposerism. as elizabeth cox says in her tedtalk on imposter syndrome during week 9 of moreau, this is not a disease or condition that means there is something wrong with us; rather, our expectations are leading us to not feel like we belong or are worthy in our environments (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox moreau fye week nine). but if we set expectations that are more true to ourselves and reachable, it is possible to avoid such feelings of imposterism. therefore, sometimes it’s important to let go of expectations. for example, coming into college (and even a little bit still now) meeting new people can be scary, but recently i’ve found that i have to let go of the expectation that i need to pursue friendships to the point where the process is stressful. rather, just working in silence with a friend in the common room of the dorm or trying a new activity (like just dance!) and being willing to be bad at it but laugh it off will ultimately bring me more joy and bring me closer to my peers. having said this, brokenness hurts—and brokenness is what i risk experiencing should my attempts to let go of expectations fail. during week 10 of moreau, my classmates and i watched a video of a kintsugi workshop in which women who were experiencing brokenness would mend smashed pieces of pottery (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week 10). these women who are shown by grotto finding healing through a kintsugi workshop do not simply ignore their pain or the challenges they’re facing; rather, through this workshop they face the brokenness from these experiences head-on, actively working to heal their own brokenness while they physically mend the broken pieces of pottery. this method of healing brokenness and recovering from obstacles resonated with me as i struggled to settle into college and also stay connected to my high school friends. i soon realized that i needed to devote more time to calculus, for example, than my peers, and it was difficult to have the self control to carve out study time and come to terms with the necessity of working hard to do well in calculus while my friends studied less and had more free time. at the same time, i was trying to balance finding new friends in college while also staying connected to my high school friends. yet, like the women in the kintsugi workshop, i was able to find ways to feel more in control of my school-life balance as well as better connected to others and to myself. sometimes, this meant attending adoration at the coleman morse chapel during a break in my classes, or playing with the club tennis team and setting my worries or stress aside. but finding healing and balance isn’t always easy; in calculus class, i had the option to drop the course and have an easier load, but instead i chose to stick with it and continue to dedicate significant study time to it. i was determined not to give up; i wasn’t going to let calculus define me. in a commencement address, father jenkins said, “if we’re going to do battle with hatred, we have to accept for practical purposes that hatred is not out there. it is in here — ready to rise in disguise inside of us, posing as virtue, sowing destruction” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by father jenkins moreau fye week 10). to me, this means that changing the world and sowing peace and healing begins with me (and all people) looking inward first. furthermore, during week 11 of moreau, parker palmer wrote, “leadership for community requires authority, a form of power that is freely granted to the leader by his or her followers” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer moreau fye week 11). when i saw that we would be reading an article by palmer for moreau, i immediately remembered that my senior theology class in high school read several books and articles by palmer, and i went back to find what they were. i uncovered my response to one of his articles on vocations in which i wrote, “in his book, palmer explains that oftentimes our search for our call and our vocation is too heavily influenced by our approach to the rest of our lives: rather than slowing down to look and listen to the world around us and the voice inside us, we attempt to shape the world to our own needs and ideas of what our vocation should be. palmer describes that much of finding your vocation comes from giving up control--in his words, ‘vocation does not come from willfulness. it comes from listening.’” in this way, community--and leadership within the community--means being one with the community. to me, this means listening to others and connecting with them in a conversational fashion so that community can truly mean something to all people within it. instead of shaping the world to fit what we want, i see vocation, leadership, and community as elements encouraging me to shape my goals and talents to better the world. finally, we discussed during week 12 that all humans go through periods of doubt. these are not moments to despair over, but to learn from and utilize to inform our being and emerge stronger. i think that this is well-illustrated in c.s. lewis’ the screwtape letters. i first read this book for fun one summer in high school, and i was enthralled by the truths subtly revealed by lewis through his cynical characters and amusing narrative. in such a scene lewis (through the character screwtape) writes, “the dryness and dullness through which your patient is now going are not, as you fondly suppose, your workmanship; they are merely a natural phenomenon…” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). as can be said (with some amusement) given this statement, we humans do not doubt because we are innately evil or because we are in the clutches of the devil whom screwtape and his demon nephew serve. rather, these are natural periods of doubt which god understands we will have, and “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it [we are] is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” (the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis moreau fye week 12). at notre dame, when i find that i am having doubts or am struggling with an issue, i like to take a walk around campus in the evening and listen to music, visit the chapel in the coleman morse center, or take a trip to the grotto before going to bed. knowing myself and knowing that i need such times of silence and prayerful reflection has helped me to deal with doubt, appreciate joy, and find balance in my life at school. overall, what i’ve learned most is that life is composed of a series of encounters. though each of these encounters may be important, what really matters the most is how i choose to respond. by seeking to respond with love and positivity and making the best of each situation and avoiding getting bogged down in doubt, i am able to be impactful in the world while remaining true to myself and pursuing the things that i am passionate about. of course i will continue to encounter doubt and stressful situations throughout college and beyond, but i look forward to facing these challenges head on in the future and remaining strong, positive, and hopeful. capstone integration moreau capstone integration 4-5-22 this is meand i am not ashamed. i will live a life of positivity, grace, kindness, and love. i will treat others with respect, regardless of their race, background, culture, religion, or beliefs. i strive to understand other people as honestly and respectfully as i can. i seek to know as much about others and the world as possible, in order to create an environment in which everyone can thrive. at notre dame, i have learned to be more than i have been in the past. i have learned to be more than my small town origins, to be more than my simple beginnings. i have learned to overcome prejudice and hatred. notre dame has been the perfect place for me to learn more about the world, and those who walk beside me in it. father hesburgh desired to establish not only a university, but a world, in which all people are treated with equal dignity. (video: "hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) week 2) i hope that i am a student that aligns with his dream. every person interact with teaches me something new, and i hope that i in turn do the same for them. i am dedicated to living a life that benefits everyone around me. i want every person i interact with to leave our interaction feeling more understood, more accepted, and more loved than they did before. i will be the person that people turn to when they need to find love. i will be the person that people rely on when the roads get rocky and when the ship gets tossed. accompaniment is walking beside someone. it is being there for them, and allowing them to be there for you, even when it is difficult. “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another.” (text: “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” (professor steve reifenberg) week 9) over these next few years at notre dame, i want to walk beside othersyounger students, classmates, friends. i will be there to help with homework or to cheer someone on at their sporting event. i will be there. i will be a dedicated daughter, a supportive sister, a loving wife, and a caring mother. i will work to keep my relationships as healthy and strong as possible. love is built on sacrifice, and i am prepared to sacrifice what i must in order to allow every relationship in my life to thrive. i will give of myself for others. it has been found that people who are dissatisfied with the way things are “are spending less time, say, thinking, reading about politics but much more time engaged in community organizations. and the story behind that is about how satisfied you are with the status quo.” (audio: “passion isn’t enough” (hidden brain media) week 11) in order to enact real change in https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143798 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143798 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143994 the world, i must actively take steps towards it, rather than just studying and planning and dreaming. knowing how you desire to help others is one thing, but actively helping others is a much more difficult task. that will be one of the most difficult challenges i come across in my lifeovercoming my ease with the status quo and being able to stand up to change it. here at notre dame, i want to ensure that every student is afforded the same opportunities for success. that is how i will change the status quo. i will also take the time to care for myself, to participate in the activities that i enjoy, to savor the moments that mean the most to me, and to appreciate all that has been given to me throughout my life. my life cannot simply be meaningless work. the key to living a good life is doing what you loveboth what makes others happy and what makes you happy. when you can do that, you can achieve true joy. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” (text: "three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) week 3) this means that joy can be found in action, but also in moments of inaction. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (text: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted), week 1) when we take the time to see all that is good and joyful around us, we can lead better lives. here at notre dame, i find joy in my nighttime walks on south quad, in playing the piano in my dorm chapel, and in praying at the grotto (week 5). i will act with courage. i cannot be afraid to stand up for what i believe in. i cannot be afraid of what others may think or what others may say. i need to act without fear and without worry. i will do what i know is right, and hold my head high, even if no one agrees with me, and even if i am unsuccessful. i will be the one to stand up during the storm. i will keep my head held high. i will remain strong. notre dame has taught me how to become an advocate, a sentinel. here, i have learned that my actions do truly matter, and that everything i do has an impact. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (text: "navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) week 4) while i may feel like there is little i can do for the world, i need to remember that every big change has to start somewhere small. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” (text: “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school) week 12) i will be strong. sometimes i feel as if i must carry all of my burdens, fears, hopes, wishes, and worries all on my own. however, i know that i cannot change the world all on my own. everyone, including https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143779 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143779 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/144011 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/144011 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/144011 myself, needs love, support, and strong relationships. no one can go it alone. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us.’” (video/text: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) week 7) in the wise words of stan lee,“compromise where you can. where you can’t, don’t. even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is right. even if the whole world is telling you to move, it is your duty to plant yourself like a tree, look them in the eye, and say ‘no. you move.’” it is up to me to do what i know is right. i desire to help improve the lives of every person i meet, a goal which aligns with the university’s core mission. “we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish.” (text: “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” (du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame) week 10) however, this is not always easy, and i am certain that there are times in which i will fail at this task. i believe that through the grace of god though, i will be able to learn, grow, and help those around me. despite what others say, i will remain true to myself, to my beliefs, to my opinions, and to the people that i love. i will face every day with joy, giving thanks to god above. my loyaltyunceasing and my respectundeniable. i will be the one they call, the one who is always reliable. i will bend in the wind, but never will i break. i will give and give as much as i can, but when i must, i will take i have no shame in crying, or in feeling far too strong. i face the world with empathy, and empathy cannot be wrong. i know how i feel. i feel quite strongly. however, i do not see this as a weakness. rather, i see it as a strength. “evidence shows the simple act of translating our emotions into language — versus simply experiencing them — can stop our brains from activating our amygdala, the fight-or-flight command center. this, in turn, seems to help us stay in control.” (text: “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) week 6) i am able to acknowledge my emotions. i know who i am and how i feel. i know myself, and that is a blessing that not many people have. by acknowledging my emotions, i can channel them into real and effective actions, rather than just leaving them as meaningless feelings. i am not the strongest, but i will be as strong as i can. my shoulders may be small, but you can cry upon them. my hands might be callused, but they are always available to help. my eyes might be teary, but i will always leave them open. my mind might be cluttered, but it will always understand. i may not be perfect, but i will be my best. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143973 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143973 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/17576282 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 integration three how attending notre dame has established my definition of a life well-lived before i came to college, i never really considered whether or not i was fulfilling a life well-lived. i’ve been on autopilot as my life takes its course from elementary school all the way up until college not really thinking about what i should do that makes me happy or what career path i should follow in the future that is a passion of mine and is beneficial to my community. although i’ve only been at notre dame for about a semester and a half, my experiences here and what i’ve learned in my classes have established my idea of a life well-lived in this short amount of time. first, learning how to transition from a life where i was dependent on my family to college, i gained a lot of independence and learned how to do things on my own. this freedom resulted in changes in my daily routine. i started practicing mindfulness and self-reflection after learning about its importance in the first week of this semester’s moreau class. this helped me reflect on my current decisions and how they affect the future decisions i make that allow me to lead a life well-lived. as i become bombarded with stress over schoolwork and feel as though i have no control over my life, taking this time to reflect allows me to decompress and take hold on the things i can control (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). now that i recognize how i can control certain aspects of my life in order to lead a life well-lived, this brings me to my next question what exactly does a life well-lived entail? although there are many aspects to the definition of a life well-lived, i have boiled it down to a few important things implementing your passions into your lifestyle, serving your community and others, and utilizing your natural skills and talents to make the world a better place. i have used the time i take for self-reflection to ask myself if i am making progress in fulfilling these goals. one way to identify how to live a life well-lived is to look at examples of others who have done so. i have found inspiration in seeing others embody how i perceive a life well-lived, such as in the case of father hesburgh. my father has always emphasized the importance of integrity, which is a trait that father hesburgh demonstrated in all aspects of his life. his emphasis on morals is what made him a man for the people he always put others before himself and had a desire to do the right thing (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). he put integrity first and service before himself, and these are what allowed him to enrich the notre dame community along with the rest of the world. i began using his actions as insight into what i want to achieve in life. to do this, i hone in on how i can make good decisions now to build myself a future like that of father hesburgh’s full of integrity and kindness. i was introduced to a new way of looking at how to accomplish this from a unique perspective by reminding myself that i will die. i use this as motivation to accomplish my dreams and help those who need help, because soon there will be a time when i won’t have the ability to do that. sister aletheia opened up my mind to this idea of focusing on death and using this as motivation to make a change for good in the world and to not take advantage of our time here (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). keeping this in mind, fulfilling my goal of living a life well-lived is not something that can be held off for the future i have to start living now, i have to start finding my passion now, and i have to start doing what makes me happy now because before i know it, my life will have gone by, and i’ll be asking myself why i didn’t do what makes me happy while i still had the chance. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html the next step after coming to this realization is putting it into action. how can i do what brings me joy and what i’m good at in a way that benefits my community and those around me? i want to choose a career that can put these goals into action. the classes i’ve taken here at notre dame have helped me discern how to do so. in the classes i’ve taken, i have found my passion in economics and finance, and i have found how i can use these career paths to help make the world a better place; for example, by learning in my economics class how the living standard in our country can be maximized (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). most importantly, i have learned how to take the next steps in leading a life well-lived all fostered by the teachings of this university. moreover, i’ve found it helpful reaching out to notre dame graduates in my planned career path and seeing how they utilize their knowledge to do great things (“week five irishcompass activity” by moreau moreau fye week five). an important part of leading a life well-lived is not getting discouraged by setbacks. everyone has struggles in their lives, but it’s learning how to continue to live a life well-lived while enduring these struggles as opposed to letting them overcome you. personally, attending notre dame has strengthened my faith and my relationship with god. so, one way i cope with my struggles is having god by my side and letting him help me respond to these struggles while continuing my goals of leading a life well-lived (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). one last important concept this course has taught me is the importance of loving others. in the definition i’ve established for a life well-lived, while i don’t explicitly state love in it, love fits under the category of serving your community and others. serving others is a way of showing love. choosing to love others despite past conflicts and without holding grudges is an important part of what allows people to continue living a life well-lived and not letting hatred tear them down (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). in conclusion, my experiences at the university of notre dame, my classes, and this course have taught me valuable lessons that greatly impact my future by introducing me to ways of leading a life well-lived. each day i set standards for myself to act with my definition of a life well-lived in mind, and it has made me a better person and allowed me to be more aware and careful of my actions and how they affect the world and others around me. i plan to continue to lead a life well-lived through the knowledge and values i’ve obtained from this class and this university. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/524003?module_item_id=168041 capstone integration the good life a life well lived isn’t based on achievements or results. a life well lived is about how one goes about their life. people should judge their lives based on the virtues they exhibit. virtues such as integrity, courage, generosity, humility are essential to live life to the fullest. these virtues or lack thereof shape one into the person they will become. people will resort to their core values when faced with adversity. does one give into temptation and take the easy way out, or remain steadfast in their ways? these moments in life reveal true character. while one can’t always control the outcomes of life, what they can control is their choices. in living a life well lived, one must make a positive impact on the world around them by sharing the gifts one has been given by god. it is imperative that one maximizes their own potential in all facets of life. the good life requires that one must live a life full of habitual virtue with a desire to better one’s own self as well as others. this is what i strive to achieve in my life. through the values instilled in me by others as well as those i have developed myself, i will be able to impact the world in a positive and meaningful way. for me, i found most meaning out of events which impact others. i take pride in my achievements and successes, but these only bring me satisfaction. as marianne moore says, “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy.” (three key questions-quote by marianne moore fye moreau week 3). the joy i find in life comes from my ability to make others’ lives better. one of the biggest reasons why i want to become an orthopedic surgeon is because i want to be able to impact people. not only am i able to fix them through actual procedures, but i also get real interactions with lots of people. notre dame has a long history of alumni who have gone on to make groundbreaking discoveries and i hope to follow in their footsteps. dr. rene bermea is an example of someone who performed groundbreaking research after losing his sister at a young age to a rare form of cancer called craniofaringioma. as he says, “i realized how important it was for us to have researchers who contribute to the knowledge base so that cases like roslyn can live.” (“domer dozen” by dr. rene bermea fye moreau week 2). my career offers me an opportunity to impact many others’ lives on a daily basis, and i look forward to being able to help these people in need. in today’s day and age, technology is a valuable tool which when utilized in the proper ways can be a great tool to help make the world a better place. the hardest part of this is to figure out the best way to do it. as pico iyer says, “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer fye moreau week 1). technology gives us a chance to connect to others which is key to a virtuous life. as pope francis said, “i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis fye moreau week 7). we must rely on others and others rely on us. in this way, we are able to impact others every single day. we are impacted either positively or negatively every single day by our surroundings. as the career development center says, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development fye moreau week 4). we have little control over our surroundings, but what we can control is our reactions. in the discernment activity, it says, “view every disappointment and setback as a lesson.” (“discernment activity” fye moreau week 5). in having a good reaction to setbacks, we are able to develop good habits which will enable us to https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ live the good life. however, it is also important that we don’t dwell on the past when thinking about shaping our future. it’s important to figure out the cause or the “why” of past events, but once we understand, it’s important to accept what has happened and ask ourselves, “what now.” as tasha eurich says, “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich fye moreau week 6). we are never able to predict what’s going to happen or how these events will shape us. as steve reifenberg says, “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg week 9). god works in mysterious ways, and we never know how an event might impact us. it is imperative that we use these events to foster positive outcomes through our responses. it is important that people don’t forget that our impact on others expands to all people. at notre dame, there is a feeling of inclusivity which is stated in the handbook which reads, “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.” (du lac: a guide to student life week 10). the beauty of the world is found in our differences, and by connecting with others of different backgrounds, there is a mutual benefit for both parties. being surrounded by only like minded people can be dangerous as dr. paul baschko says, “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing sense of how someone might reasonably disagree.” (dr. paul baschko how to avoid an echo chamber week 11). it’s this ability to disagree or see the differences in each other that allows the world to become a better place. we each have a responsibility to protect others from abuse or https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s prejudice which can be detrimental to everyone’s ability to live the good life. as dean g. marcus cole says, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' week 12). he is able to use what he has learned to make a difference, but it doesn’t take a college degree or position of leadership to make a change. all people have both the ability and responsibility to foster inclusivity in the world through whatever means they might be able to. in living a life of virtue, one finds meaning in their life through their ability to impact others. at notre dame, i am surrounded by others who have similar values and beliefs which encourage me to want to develop good habits in my own life. through the next three years, i hope to apply these virtues in my relationships with others in order to help make the world a better place because ultimately in making others’ lives better, i make my own life better. i continue to strive to live virtuously by remaining rooted in my morals no matter what situations or obstacles may arise in my life. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ 4 march 2022 the wonderful and tragic life of abigail kavanaugh today we have come together to celebrate and reflect on the beautiful and tragic life of . though she was only 19 when she passed, i can wholeheartedly say that abbey lived an extraordinary and fulfilling life. she constantly loved to surround herself with the people she loved, and the people she knew understood her and would always be by her side. nothing could stop abbey from going out into the world and trying something totally bazaar and unlike her, but that’s what made her so unique. abbey didn’t let anyone tell her what was right or wrong when it came to how she lived and how she viewed the world. abbey was passionate about learning everything she could about new things in life and about what truly interested her, including the area of science that she was studying while attending the university of notre dame. ever since she was young, abbey knew that she wanted to do something with her life that would bring joy and hope to others around her, and she wanted to be able to meet and help new people every day constantly. because of this, abbey fell in love with the idea of being a doctor when she was just 11 years old. although she didn’t fully understand the path and journey she would have to take to achieve this, she knew that in the end, no matter what, she would be a doctor. because of this, when she chose the university she would (hopefully) spend her college years at, her heart was set on majoring in biological science and then going on to medical school. when abbey first got to college and debated her major, she did have some doubts, as any typical student does. it wasn’t until she read a letter from the center for career development, in which they mentioned that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week four). after reading this, abbey started to reflect on her choices and major. she went out of her way to have a deep and greatly needed conversation with her mom, which clarified abbey. abbey’s mom got the chance to talk about how she viewed abbey and what she thought about abbey’s choices, and even the future she saw for her daughter (“discernment activity” moreau fye week five). abbey cherished this conversation because it was one she knew she needed to have and brought her to a decision that would shape her life. in the end, abbey knew that she had made the right choice of studying biology. after all, she didn’t choose it because she wanted to be a doctor, but she picked it because she loved learning about what makes living things, living, and what makes us the functioning people we are today. abbey was so enamored and interested in the body that her room at home was filled with different pictures and knick-knacks of skulls that she looked at and loved. these skulls brought abbey comfort and joy because they reminded abbey that everyone is made up of the same things and that they were all fragile and human. when abbey learned about sister theresa aletheia and her views on death and love for skulls, she connected with her instantly. abbey agreed with sister aletheia that people need to understand that they don’t have all the time in the world to do everything they want, so they need to live life to the fullest now and live without any regrets (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). and abbey just did this. abbey always lived life to the fullest and was always open to new things and experiences. abbey was a great friend and daughter, and she was always there for the ones she loved no matter what was going on in her own life. abbey chose to be the person everyone knew they could go to to get advice about anything. she was the person to offer up solutions or to simply be there to offer a shoulder or ear, whether a person just needed to vent or to cry. when abbey first learned about father ted hesburgh when at notre dame, that is someone that abbey greatly admired and wanted to be like. she described him as this great man who helped everyone regardless of the obstacles. he was described as a “bridge-builder” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) who constantly brought people together irrespective of their differences. because of this, abbey took it upon herself to reflect this quality. she wanted to be described as a ‘bridge builder’ just like father ted, and i can happily say she achieved this. abbey looked for different people and actively created relationships that she would never have without going out of her way. abbey always treated people with kindness and tenderness regardless of who they were. whenever asked how i would describe abbey in one word, i would say either of these. abbey constantly had a smile on her face and constantly was helping others. she prided herself on showing tenderness and believed that that was the way everyone should live. she once listened to a talk from the pope in which he explained that “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). abbey wholeheartedly agreed with this statement, and she wanted others to understand it as well. abbey was always tender and understanding towards others and their situations because she had the biggest heart i knew. she was always there for others, where she was the happiest. although abbey was always there to help them with anything they needed, she always knew when she needed to take time for herself and reflect. whenever abbey felt overwhelmed or simply like she just needed to catch up with life, she always took a step back and would spend time in her room by herself just reflecting. abbey understood that sometimes she needed to get disconnected from everything and just sit and silence to reflect. there was a quote she lived by which said, “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). she knew that sometimes she needed a break from people and technology to take a minute for herself and reflect on her life. although it was a little more challenging to do at college due to all the assignments and exams, she still tried whenever she could. and during these reflection times, she took the time to catch up with her life and everything going on around her. although abbey actively reflected, she often said she didn’t feel fully there and caught up with her life. it wasn’t until going to notre dame and experiencing and learning new things that she understood why. while there, she learned the difference between asking what verses why. in an article, she learned that “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential. “why questions stir up negative emotions; what questions keep us curious. why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). as a result, abbey started to change the way she reflected and started to ask more of the what questions. after doing this, everyone could see a difference in how she held herself and how she viewed her life. abbey was more open to difficulties and understood what was happening in her life better than anyone i knew. abbey was an amazing woman who taught me and countless others important lessons about who we are and how life is. abbey lived a wonderful life and achieved as much as she could in the little time she had. capstone integration follet 1 moreau fye 29 april 2022 our life well-lived a burning question that always comes up frequently in our lives is how we can live a life well-lived. it seems like a simple question but this is something that all of us struggle to find the true meaning of throughout our lives and something that we must figure out ourselves through experience. throughout my experiences in my life and at notre dame, i have found the answers to this question and learned the important steps to living my life well. first off, an important step to living a life well-lived is finding out what you truly enjoy in life and finding the difference between joy and happiness. just because you might like something one day, it does not mean that it brings long term happiness. this quote reflects this point and states, “what’s the difference between joy and happiness? it’s not a matter of whether this makes you happy or not because happiness is affected by many external factors (sleep, illness, hunger, loneliness, etc.). happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (himes). this quote shows that most of the time we act on happiness and think that it is joy but happiness is only short term. this can cause us to make long term decisions that do not actually align with our goals. you must learn to recognize this difference through the experiences in life and make sure to really pay attention to this as you go through life. this will ensure that you find what brings you long term joy in life so that you can live a life well-lived. follet 2 another important key to living a life well-lived is knowing how to accept help from others. a quote that talks about this is, “accompaniment is a path to help waken those dormant dreams. with respect and intelligence, humbly and without arrogance -with humble confidence or confident humility -we can be ambitious for making meaningful change.” (reifenberg 10). this quote stood out to me because it talks about how interactions with others and the world through accompaniment help us awaken our dreams and better achieve our goals. we can open our minds and ourselves up to the world to continue to grow and let others help accomplish our goals. i really agree with this quote and how accompaniment helps you reach your goals and discover things about yourself that you would not have been able to if you just shut yourself off and tried to take on everything in your life alone. you cannot bear all of the challenges and suffering you encounter in your life alone, you need help to get through these times and accomplish your goals. i realized this throughout my life too and had to learn this for myself because i thought once too that i had to overcome these challenges with my strength alone. once you accept this, you will be able to accomplish more feats than ever before and help you live a life well-lived. another important aspect of a life well-lived is being able to look past people's differences so that you are able to make connections with the others around you. a quote that shows this is, “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated. we value gay and lesbian members of this community as we value all members of this community. we condemn harassment of any kind, and university policies proscribe it. we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in follet 3 which none are strangers and all may flourish.” (und). this quote stood out to me because in order to embrace humanity we need to accept everyone no matter what opinions or characteristics they might have. i agree with this because in my experience, it seems that the things that usually separate people and tear them apart are the things that do not truly matter in life, like physical characteristics or opinions on politics for example. this is an important attribute to have because you never know which people you meet will end up becoming close with you and leaving an impression on you, so it is very important to reach out to everyone you meet no matter what differences they might have. another key to living a life well-lived is expanding your social horizon beyond your usual norms. a good quote for this topic is, “first of course, we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to. seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (blaschko). this quote spoke to me because it basically says that in order to protect ourselves from social bubbles and echo chambers, we need to be intentional and careful about the people we surround ourselves with and the information we choose to absorb. if we only take in biased information from the same type of sources, we will never learn or grow in our lives and become more wise. i agree with the dangers of social bubbles and echo chambers in society and if we are only exposed to biased information that consists of our own opinions then we will never be enlightened or be able to grow as a person. we will only ever think we are right in our opinion about everything and only know how to dismiss others thoughts and opinions and this will end up steering us in the wrong direction. if we want to grow and become wise then we have to broaden our world and keep an open mind and we have to avoid social bubbles and echo chambers. this is one of the keys to living a life well-lived and is something that has helped me grow over the past year. follet 4 before i came to notre dame, i thought that success was measured by possessions and things that were physically attained. i thought things like money, fame, position, strength and skill were the things that measured success in life. in fact that was the reason i came to notre dame, to attend a prestigious university to pursue a professional degree and play high level division-i college lacrosse and make a name for myself. i came from poor circumstances and did not have many people that believed in me so i was constantly trying to gain approval through these advancements. but once i got to notre dame and met my team, i became surrounded by people that believed in me and loved me more than anything. even though i had not even gotten the chance to prove any of my skills to them, they already believed in me and showed kindness and love towards me from the very moment i got there. it was after this i realized that there is more to life than just possessions and status, it was about these people. the people that brought me up and loved me without needing reason. the people who stayed by my side and gave me memories more valuable than any physical worldly possession. these people are what give my life purpose and i will continue to live through them just as they do for me. they are the reason i am able to live a life well-lived. follet 5 works cited (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week two) (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four) (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame moreau fye week ten) (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ intergration three who was he? up to this point, time and time again he found himself overwhelmed with this tough life and everyday task. along the way with the guidance of friends, family, and more importantly god. he had learned how to handle himself without completely breaking down and giving up. in week one reading, it tells us why it is important to reflect, slow down, and take a break from the things we do all the time. in the reading “congressman tim ryan leads his colleagues in the house of representatives in a session of sitting still, reminding them that, if nothing else, it’s been found by scientists that meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains.” like i mentioned in that week's response, this quote really resonated with him. i remember after coming back to his room and doing exactly what tim’s said, he immediately became more relaxed. often times when he was caught up in just getting done what he need to get done, he forget to reflect and relax and simply just be still and breathe. one day after this module he was reflecting and remembered that there was a bible verse that tells us to do the same thing tim mentioned. it reads psalm 46:10 “ be still, and know that i am god”. this was incredibly powerful to him and also made him feel refreshed each time he read it after feeling worn out and overwhelmed. to him, this way of life is what he would call a life well-lived. he wanted to be remembered as a god-fearing man when his time came to leave this earth. remembered as someone who was strong in faith and striving to do god's work here on earth. in week 2 we discuss inspirations of a life well-lived. i remember in the video someone saying “ i think we were all in aww of such an incredible life” (1:43:21). this quote says a lot specifically about the things he did while he was alive. it is super inspiring to see that he lives on in the memory of other people and even in other ways such as history boards and things like that. i feel as prince wanted to be remembered like this too. this inspired him to want to be impactful in this world to where he would have the same effect on people after he was gone as well. in the video, he mentions how he turns away from his wealth and really immerses himself in the lives of others. simple that act is just extraordinary and is something prince wanted to try and replicate in his life. the sort of selflessness he showed throughout his life is awesome, i feel like that is a recipe to a life well-lived. this aspect coupled with prince’s personal goals i mentioned in the paragraphs above is how he would define a life well-lived. week three talks about keeping in mind that no one will live forever and that everyone must die sometimes. eventually, prince thought this way of thinking was unusual at first but soon he realized it made sense. a quote from week three's module said that “ remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and breathtakingly beautiful.” i understand why prince that this was unusual but i am glad that he comprehended the true meaning of what this quote says. he made it a priority from that point on to live this way. knowing that every little word can either be negative or positive. knowing that his days on this earth were numbered and to make the most of each and every second. i remember soon after he learned this he was a totally different person. always full of life and love and joy. constantly trying to bring those same feelings to everyone he crossed paths with. prince wanted to be remembered as someone who put others first in every situation. week four talks about some of the careers an individual could choose to ultimately make them feel they have lived a great life. prince wasn’t really sure what career he wanted to pursue for the rest of his life but whatever it was. he wanted it to be meaningful not only to himself but others too. “planning your career is much like planning a trip.” he struggled early on to find the right career path for him. during his time at notre dame, this quote stuck out to him and he relayed it to me. he mentioned that this is interesting but easier said than done. he planned trips all the time but it was nothing like planning his career out. eventually, he found something that he enjoyed and did it for the rest of his life. in week five he discussed with a coach that he was very close with back in his home state. they were instructed to have a conversation concerning when his coach had seen him at his best moments. i remember prince saying that the conversation was insightful and interesting for a few reasons. after all the questions he had asked his coach, he told me that all the responses had something to do with football. this made him feel indifferent. he believed and knew that life was much more than football and ultimately, yes he wanted to be remembered as an individual who was good at football but also someone who was much more than football. as i mentioned above, he wanted to be a spiritual person who influenced and impacted other people's lives for the better. week six tells us about how we can handle obstacles in our lives. oftentimes prince would harp on the negative. always talking about the negative. he would always tell me this or that sucks or he wishes this didn’t happen or he doesn’t know why he has to do this. but after reading this quote from someone who is constricted to a wheelchair he quickly humbled himself. “so i always focused on what i cannot do”. during that module, he saw how that person eventually changed his perspective and learned to focus on the things he does have and the things he can do, and the impact he can make. prince really enjoyed this. he thought it was amazing that someone in that situation can continue to see the good and opportunities in life. prince took this to heart and eventually became a person who brought positivity to every situation no matter how ugly it looked. week seven tells us about relationships of a life well-lived. prince understood the true value of relationships. “love you g-dawg”.this type of interaction is one he had in nearly all of his relationships. growing up he had plenty of great relationships and plenty of people who wanted to see him succeed. this resulted in him continuing to place the same value on relationships throughout his whole life. he was someone that if you got a chance to really speak to him and build a relationship with him you would remember it forever. in conclusion, prince was a great individual. there was more to him than meets the eye. i think its safe to say that he reached his goals and left his mark here on earth lynch 1 david lassen moreau fye 24 april 2022 one connection at a time my mission is to constantly seek out new adventures and experiences that allow me to build meaningful connections with all types of people, and to use these relationships to drive positive change in the world. in week 13 of moreau, i was tasked with creating my personal mission statement and concluded that to live fully is to challenge oneself through connection, adventure, and learning experiences. a life well-lived is one in which nothing is taken for granted and each day is an opportunity to cherish my loved ones, appreciate my education, and stare in awe at the beauty of the world around me (moreau fye week 13). i strive to be steadfast and diligent in every aspect of my life whether that be in the classroom, in my faith, on the soccer field, and in building and maintaining relationships with others. i will use the tenets i learned from this course to strike a balance between work and play to create space for relaxation. this newfound balance will allow me to further pursue my goals and live out my mission statement in a sustainable way. a life well-lived involves acquiring both knowledge and wisdom throughout one’s life. i strive to learn as much as i can not just in the classroom, but also through my relationships with others. not only do i seek to understand the ins and outs of neuroscience and behavior and spanish literature in my studies at notre dame, but i have a powerful urge to travel and observe all different customs and cultures. i will begin building this understanding over the summer by studying abroad in santiago, chile, where i will live with a host family and experience an entirely different way of lynch 2 life. an extensive understanding of communities around the world will allow me to properly respect others, build relationships, and gain wisdom that cannot be ascertained solely through books. in week 11 of moreau, i learned that wisdom is a crucial component of a fulfilling life. my definition of wisdom is not simply knowing information, but rather a deep awareness of how the world works and an understanding of how to respectfully interact with others. in his youtube video “how to avoid an echo chamber,” dr. paul blaschko explains that when we participate in “echo chambers,” groups that discredit other’s opinions, we are preventing ourselves from understanding the world in different ways (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blashcko,https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd, moreau fye week 11). wisdom involves compassion, an open heart, and a willingness to hear out other’s opinions. true wisdom comes from tolerance of diverse opinions and viewpoints. over the next three years, i will avoid falling into echo chambers by maintaining an open mindset and continually reevaluating my own beliefs, which can only be done by carefully listening to others. i am resilient and able to overcome suffering by trusting in god and remaining deeply grateful for all he has given me. a life well-lived requires a constant sense of hope and trust in the lord despite the challenges of our world. in week 6, jd kim’s inspiring story about his change in mindset after a tragic snowboarding accident inspired me to find a new appreciation for my life. (“5 minutes” by grotto, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146544 moreau fye week 6). jd kim found himself feeling utterly helpless after a tragic snowboarding accident. his new reality was life in a wheelchair, which he had to recline every 15 minutes to maintain his blood pressure. instead of focusing on these frustrations, he changed his mindset and found so much joy in the world by becoming thankful for the things he could do and focusing on appreciating those things each day. i strive to live with this same firm trust in god https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146544 lynch 3 and gratitude for all i have, despite the times when darkness seems to take over my life. i have begun to live with this appreciation this semester by embracing my close friendships and moments of humor in study group sessions, in the midst of great stress about organic chemistry exams. for example, when walking into my first organic chemistry office hours session, i was truly doubting my academic abilities and found myself in a dark place. little did i know that at these office hours, i would meet one of my best friends, nadim. we were immediately laughing together and were able to bond over the academic struggle, and now share a special relationship that never would have formed if it were not for the obstacles we faced together. i am grateful for everything god has given me and will continue to live with joy and appreciation despite the obstacles and suffering i encounter. i strive to be a friend to those who are lonely and suffering through accompaniment. i will not abandon others in their time of need and will choose to simply stay and support them however i can. during week 9, i learned the term accompaniment, which is all about approaching relationships with the mindset that you and the other person, or group, are equals on the journey of life. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6clg3sh-rs30/edit, moreau fye week 9). professor reifenberg learned this when visiting chile with great intentions to aid children in an orphanage and had no clue that the kids would actually be the ones helping and accompanying him. the entire concept of accompaniment is that we must approach suffering by simply standing alongside someone in their time of need, keeping in mind that this is a two-sided relationship and not simply one person helping the other. i strive to accompany others with a sense of humility and understanding that although i may be able to use my talents to help them in one area, they have different talents and resources that i likely do not https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit lynch 4 have. this semester, i have learned how to accompany someone when aiding my roommate, maggie, when she was facing the death of one of her childhood best friends. i could see that she was facing great suffering after this event and attempted to simply stay by her side and provide my support in any way that i could. i constantly checked up on her throughout the day, sat and listened as she expressed all of her emotions, and tried to cheer her up with small jokes and gestures whenever i could. accompaniment is key to a life well-lived and is all about supporting others with a sense of humility and respect. i will continue to accompany my classmates, friends, professors, and family throughout my time at notre dame by acknowledging the ‘twowayedness’ of relationships and selflessly caring for others. while a life well-lived is indeed busy and full of seeking out new adventures while serving others, it requires rest. a life well-lived requires a sense of inner peace, stability, and trust in god. in week 1 of moreau, we explored the concept that rest is crucial to achieving all of our goals. in such a fast-paced world, we are all used to constantly working hard without checking on our mental health and physical health. the article for this week explained that if we were to all take some time to meditate, relax, and pursue our hobbies, this rest would actually increase the quality of our work and increase our efficiency (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer, ted, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492, moreau fye week 1). when forming my schedule, it is just as important for me to put all of my assignments on the paper as it is to include working out, handing out with friends, meditating, and simply resting. a life well-lived requires a sense of stability, which can only be achieved with sufficient rest and sleep. during my first semester at notre dame, i did not understand the importance of rest and found myself constantly working on schoolwork without a break. this semester, i have come to understand the importance of sleep, exercise, and eating healthy in https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 lynch 5 taking care of my mental and physical state. one extremely special experience i have had was joining the ultimate frisbee club team, in which i have met many great friends and enjoyed exercising outdoors. these few hours a week have allowed me to realize the importance in participating in all types of activities, which do not always have to revolve around school. in the rest of my time at notre dame, i will continue to prioritize my health by not solely focusing on school, but allowing time for exercise, socialization, and sleep in my schedule. i will only be able to successfully live out my mission statement and generate positive change by forming relationships if i am energized and healthy. a life well-lived requires a true acknowledgement of our mortality which sparks new appreciation for what we have and an urgency to explore our talents and passions while we can. during week 3, sister aletheia explained in her article that death is “exotic” to us nowadays. many times, i am so busy either studying, working out, hanging out with friends, or distracting myself with social media that i never contemplate the fact that i am going to die. unfortunately, while these distractions present an easy route, they do not lead to a life well-lived. when we choose to ignore death, we fail to appreciate much of the beauty of life and do not embrace our experiences and loved ones as deeply as we should (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146506 , moreau fye week 3). to lead a fulfilling life, i must acknowledge that i have a limited time to live out my mission statement. keeping this acknowledgement of my mortality in my mind will inspire me to get up and give all of the love i can to the people who are special to me, use my talents to help others, and travel to experience all of the world that i have yet to see. in my time at notre dame, i plan to do all of the things that bring me joy, including growing closer to my friends, volunteering, cooking, working out, researching, going to milkshake mass, learning about https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146506 lynch 6 neuroscience, and reading spanish literature to become as healthy, alive, and fulfilled as i can. while it is difficult to come to terms with the fact that i am going to die one day, i must come to terms with my mortality in order to live with a great appreciation of everything i have and to act while i can. i am a caring, dependable friend to all. i seek to make people feel comfortable and loved around me, so that their burdens may rise off their shoulders for a moment, and they can feel at peace. father hesburgh had this special gift of connecting with others, and used it to generate massive change, for example, through the creation of the civil rights act of 1964. he had an ability to bring people together through basic human connection and to remind them of all of the joy in life that we miss out on when we choose to argue. ultimately, father hesburgh’s simple idea of connecting a few men through their passion for fishing and the outdoors, led to massive change for millions of americans (“hesburgh,” by jerry barca and christine o’malley, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-45498581-ab9500c9ecd9, moreau fye week 2). i strive to creatively connect people in the same way as father hesburgh, simply making small changes wherever i can in order to generate a larger, positive impact on the world. i will do this in my time at notre dame by using my humor to unite people in times of conflict or struggle. little moments of laughter and true connection with others bring an unexplainable sense of appreciation and lightness into my heart. i hope to use these moments to form relationships with others and to unite people or groups who are at odds. a life-well lived requires welcoming and appreciating people of diverse ethnicities, sexual orientations, genders, religions, and economic classes, into our lives. all of this diversity is what makes the world and notre dame community so special, and i will cherish it in my time https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 lynch 7 on this campus and beyond. in my introduction to african american literature university seminar last semester, i began to understand that i had misjudged the extent of racism in our society. while diversity should be praised and celebrated, our biological inclination to stereotype and categorize people has led to the mistreatment of millions of people in america. in week 12 of moreau, we read an essay from dean g. marcus cole, which allowed me to realize that even distinguished members of the notre dame community have faced violent experiences on account of their race. cole explained that as a black man, he and his father have been subject to horrible violence, not only physically but also emotionally (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146613, moreau fye week 12). we discussed a lot of this violence in my usem, uncovering how black americans continue to face discrimination from the police and other governmental institutions. my understanding of racism in america was furthered in an essay from dr. robin diangelo in week 10 of moreau, in which i learned the term “white fragility.” this term explains the fact that white people tend to withdraw and argue when presented with uncomfortable information regarding racial relationships (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146592, moreau fye week 10). this apathy and failure to act allows unequal societal structures to remain in place for white and black americans, which leads to the mistreatment of black people across the united states. although it can be awkward and uncomfortable to speak about, it is crucial that we understand this racial divide and work to fight against the racism which still exists today. a life-well lived is not one in which i sit back and accept the abuse of innocent people on account of their race, but one in which i fight for change on an individual level. i will do this by avoiding making https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146613 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146592 lynch 8 assumptions about people and taking the time to understand the traditions and customs of people from different countries in order to form respectful, meaningful relationships. when i witness my friends making incorrect generalizing about groups of people, i will speak up and remind them of the way that they would want to be discussed by others. a life well-lived involves celebration of diversity of all kinds, which i will fight for in the ways that i can. i will use my love of medicine and learning languages to serve others as a doctor. my knowledge is meaningless unless it is used to help in my community. i want patients to feel comfortable around me and to help them feel cared for, loved, and special when they are going through some of the most difficult times they will face in their lives. in week 4 of moreau, i began to consider career opportunities and received great advice from a mereulo center article. the article explained that i should begin taking a small chunk of time out of my schedule each week to talk to older notre dame students about their experiences and to connect with doctors in my community (“navigating your career journey – moreau first year experience course,” by mereulo family center for career development, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigatingyour-career-journey---moreau/, moreau fye week 4). by speaking to older girls in my dorm and shadowing a local gynecologist, i realized i am going down a path i am extremely eager about and a life well-lived will involve serving others using my passion for medicine and spanish. i also spoke to my mom for advice on discerning my future career in week 5 (“week five discernment conversation activity” by mereulo family center for career development,https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbw clh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing, moreau fye week 5). i explained to my mom that i felt very worried and uncertain about my future, and she reassured me by saying there are many paths to the final destination and no single way to get there. my mom told me that she knows i am very https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing lynch 9 passionate and talented in the areas i am studying (neuroscience and behavior and spanish) and that i need to trust myself more in the process. a life-well lived involves having trust in my talents and continuing to pursue them until i arrive at my final career destination. i will continue to pursue my passions by studying hard in my neuroscience and spanish classes, joining preprofessional clubs, volunteering, and gaining clinical experience so that i can attend medical school. with these future steps and a confident attitude, i will place myself on the path to becoming a doctor and leading a life well-lived, which simply involves helping others using my talents. in the midst of chasing my own career goals, i will prioritize my relationships with others above my own personal gain. in week 7 of moreau, we watched a video from pope francis, who explained that we must not forget to slow down and love each other in such a busy, technologically advanced world (“why the only future worth building includes everyone,” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562, moreau fye week 7). at times, it is very easy to view others as my enemies, in the classroom or in the workforce, especially in such a competitive society. i have fallen victim to feeling immense pressure to do well in school and have begun to view my best friends as competition, which did not help me succeed at all. instead of viewing my peers as competitors for the next 3 years, i will focus on acting with love and forming relationships with them. i try to focus on my own performance and push myself to be better than i was the day before, rather than comparing myself to others. this semester of moreau has taught me that a life-well lived involves developing many specific characteristics, which i will work to acquire throughout these next 3 years. i seek to be not solely intelligent but also wise, to be resilient in the face of suffering, to be friendly to those https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562 lynch 10 who are lonely or struggling, to remain stable and calm in busy times, to be appreciative of my relationships and education, to be caring to strangers, to celebrate all kinds of diversity, and to use my love of science to one day become a doctor. in order to achieve all of these goals, i must stay true to my mission statement and remember all the smaller goals i have generated to achieve them. through the small action of forming relationships, i will create large-scale change in the world, one connection at a time. integration 3 moreau fye 3/4/2022 : the story of my life we gather here today to celebrate the life of . despite his passing, nolan would want all of us to save their tears and celebrate his life. so, while we are all together, let's take time to reflect on nolan’s life well-lived. although he always worked hard and made sure to put his full effort into everything that he did, nolan also knew how to rest and recenter himself. for nolan, the work life balance was not just something he focused on, but he knew that it was an essential part of living a fulfilling life. nolan often said that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). he thought that so many of us think of rest as a sign of weakness, a sign that you are not being productive, however, nolan knew that by taking time to think about yourself and relax, you were improving your mental state and letting your body re-center itself. by letting himself rest, nolan was able to lead a life well-lived. nolan never considered anyone an enemy. he made friends wherever he went and with whoever he saw. he had no place for hate in his heart and nolan thought that everyone should treat everyone else with respect. he especially disliked when people would marginalize others and be intolerant of those with different backgrounds or ideas. his life reminds me of the movie hesburgh where one of the people talking to hesburgh during the civil rights movement says “i’ve made friends with soldiers on both sides. i just don’t want to see my friends dead” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). nolan never wanted anyone to suffer and he would always do anything he could to help out other people and make sure they lived a comfortable life. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 nolan was also great at finding lasting happiness and joy. he always lived with a smile on his face and a positive attitude on life. he did not think of happiness as a goal, but a source of motivation and drive to be the best person that he could be. he always liked to say that “contentment is an obstacle. joy always pushes us forward. it’s a impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open ones talents even more widely than one had before” (“meet the nun that wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). he always lived with the force of joy pushing him to be his best and achieve everything that he wanted to achieve. i think we could all learn from his devotion to using joy to push him to a fulfilled life. nolan also realized that every event in his life held importance and influence on his goals and aspirations. he took every opportunity to squeeze as much as he could out of everyday life as well as the unique experiences along the way. he understood that “you’re not just checking a box and moving on. every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). nolan took every opportunity to make sure he got the most out of his life. nolan also understood the importance of communication and having conversations with everyone around him. he particularly liked to talk with people of all different backgrounds and ages to get their perspectives on life and everything else. he knew that “there is a lot you do not understand about yourself until people point it out” (“week 5 qqc” by moreau week five). he thought that it was also necessary to have others gauge your strengths and weaknesses. he thought that oftentimes people get too caught up in their own perspectives of themselves, so he always liked to converse with others and help them realize aspects about themselves that they had never considered before. nolan enjoyed self-reflection. he was always trying to be the best version of himself that he could. to him, this meant that it was important to take time to reflect on oneself. however, he https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/assignments/49146?module_item_id=143014 knew that there is a certain way that someone should go about doing this. nolan thought that if you reflect in a bad way, you only perpetuate your bad habits. likewise, he understood that “the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). if you do not reflect on yourself in the right way, then you will not realize the things about yourself that you actually want to decipher and discern. nolan understood this concept and always worked to reflect in the right ways to approach the version of himself that he desired. finally, nolan devoted himself to making the world a better place. specifically, he thought that peace in the world depended on the relationships that we make with others and how we treat those around us. for him, that meant maintaining the relationships formed throughout our lives and ensuring that we try to have a positive impact on everyone that we meet. he always liked to say “how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us” as a way to portray the need for everyone to be dedicated in their relationships (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). nolan understood that we are only as impactful in changing the world as the relationships we make with others, so it is in our best interest to connect with everyone possible. nolan practiced and preached what it means to live a life well-lived. may he forever rest in peace. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/143033 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/143033 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript 3/4/22 it’s a wonderful life personally, i believe that a life well lived is not something that can really be exactly put into words, or at least i do not think there are necessarily any absolute answers. for instance, i do not think that someone needs to be remembered after they die in order for them to have led a good life, i am sure there have been millions of people that lived fulfilling lives in small villages all over the world that people do not remember but that does not mean their lives were not well lived. nor do i think that a life well lived can be quantified with any particular actions or goals. to me personally, i think living a life well lived means that you will be able to look back on your life when you are old and be truly satisfied with the life you led, the choices you made, and how you got to where you are. it is important to consider these sorts of ideas, to think how you will view certain decisions from your deathbed. it is certainly a prevalent idea within the catholic church and many other religions with the idea of a memento mori. there people like sister theresa alethia who would like to serve as a living memento mori to remind people to consider their own death and what sort of life they will leave behind (https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html by ruth graham, moreau fye week three). while there are not absolutes to what contributes to life well lived there are most certainly common themes that seem to be present in a lot of people to report happy lives. introspection about one’s own life is most certainly necessary at times but too much introspection or improper introspection can ultimately have an inverse effect on how it impacts your life making individuals more stressed out and worried about life. over analyzing every single event and action of your life through meditation will never be helpful. additionally if you are already in a negative mindset, analyzing your actions can sometime led people to simply go deeper into a spiral of anxiety and sadness because no matter what they perceive their action to be bad (https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yestheres-a-wrong-way/ by tasha eurich, moreau fye week six). as always there is a happy medium in between these two that can be beneficial; being able to impartially analyze our actions and reflect on them is crucial for becoming a better person, and it is absolutely necessary if we hope to live a good life. we need to be able to reflect on our lives to understand if the decisions we are making are the ones that will leave us happy down the road and this sort of introspection and mindfulness is absolutely crucial to being able to understand and discern what we want from life. naturally, a large portion of what contributes to whether or not a life is well lived is what work we choose to do during our lifetime. no matter what we spend a significant portion of our lives doing work, what that work is can vary but it is important to seek out work that is worth doing for each individual. what work someone find as fulfilling will vary from person to person but it is important to understand what you want from a job. it can be hard find what work will be best for you but the most important things you can do are to know yourself, study what you enjoy, and try out a variety of jobs and majors; all of these things are important to understanding and discerning what you might want to do in life (https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ by notre dame, moreau week 4 fye). while finding work that you enjoy doing would be ideal, it is not the only thing that might matter to someone when looking for jobs. at times a person may need to take a job that pays better but they do not life in order to support people they care about, though in a way that could still be considered work worth doing by the individual because it allows them to take care of those they love. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ that simply goes to show that while jobs and work are important to consider when forming a life welllived it is not the only things that is important. ultimately, the relationships that we form tend to be the largest thing that contributes to leading a life well lived. these relationships are present in all other aspects of living a life well lived, and both forming good relationships and removing bad relationships are crucial to living a good life. that is not to say to only surround yourself with relationships that are always positive, that is impractical, all meaningful relationships will likely require some degree of work in order to maintain them. additionally, having some adverse relationships is not inherently a bad thing because they can act as a contrasting point for what a good relationship should look like and they can help you learn how to overcome certain obstacles in your life. pope francis himself has stated that it is vitally important to form meaningful relationships with those around us, and that, to an extent, includes those around us who may not like us and those who we may not life. holding hatred in your heart rarely increases your life expectance, and ultimately holding hatred for people in your heart only lets those people continue to have a degree of control over you (https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes _everyone/transcript by pope francis, moreau fye week seven). the relationships that we form truly dictate a great deal of how we will live our lives. having positive relationships, even if they are purely professional or tangential relationships, contributes greatly to the sense of having a fulfilling life. you do not have to be best friends with everyone you meet, but you should not try to be antagonistic either. ultimately, what living a life well lived mean it entirely up to each individual to decide. obviously, we cannot all have quite as storied lives as fr. hesburgh and all of his endeavors, but that does not mean that we cannot find meaningful and fulfilling lives ourselves (https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144076, by jerry barca and christine o'malley, moreau fye week two). in order to lead good lives we must be able to honestly and openly look within ourselves to ask ourselves questions about whether or not we truly enjoy the work that we do, the people we are around, or any number of other aspect of our lives if we ever hope to led a good life. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144076 week 8 integration three moreau fye integration 3 2/27/22 devotion and distinction: the life of it is with great sadness and sorrow that we must say goodbye to christian j. trzeciak, a true inspiration to all humanity. while many will remember christian for his heroism and glory as the 50th president of the united states, his life before fame was much more telling of his character and virtue. from his humble upbringing in south jersey to his collegiate education at notre dame, christian demonstrated what being an exceptional man was truly about. i think we all can learn from how he continually acted on his foundational beliefs, and how he stayed steadfast to his principles in the face of adversity. it was father theodore hesburgh who once said, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up” (hesburgh). christian adopted that mindset, and his will to build up and strengthen elements of his life that truly matter is the backbone of christian’s great legacy. first off, christian’s entire highschool experience, collegiate experience, and life after education were all about building friendship and family bonds that he could be proud of. in high school, he devoted a tremendous amount of energy to forging lasting relationships with his friends, some of whom are in the crowd today. he continued this practice in college as well. he would build up a group of solid and faithful friends around him, then devote himself to them completely. christian saw these friendships of virtue as life giving and noble. christian’s most prized example of “building something up”, however, was his family. his wife, four kids, and two dogs were his inspiration and motivation during his life. christian understood that the journey through life is not the work of one man; rather, it’s the culmination of many people giving loving support. as pope francis once aptly pointed out, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (francis). much of christian’s legacy reflects this ideology. his fierce devotion to his family and friends gave his life lasting meaning that he could not find elsewhere. at the same time, christian was working diligently to build up a successful career. when he started at notre dame, there was a fire in him that motivated him to be a great success. his work ethic and drive had him on track to be a great business student and a skilled financial professional, though the meruelo center for career development made him realize that he wasn’t “deciding his career path when picking his major” (meruelo). instead, the university helped him to see all the potential avenues to do good in the world that could stem from a finance degree. he learned from his mother and father from a very young age that serving is not just an extracurricular; it’s a moral imperative. with that in mind, christian chose to be a financial manager for a successful non-profit rather than going to work at more lucrative firms. christian made many sacrifices to do humanitarian and philanthropic work that made a difference in his community, and his commitment to serving others shall alway be remembered. later on, through networking with political insiders, christian “explored and grew in knowledge of himself” (compass) by crossing over from business into politics. from that platform, christian was sure that he could help the greatest number of people and change the most lives. word of christian’s noble ambitions spread fast, eventually elevating him to the office of the presidency. as president, not only did he prevent nuclear war with russia, solidify global peace, establish american world dominance, and vanquish the alien star fleet, but he also did immeasurable good works for the poor. never before had a president been so compassionate and loving to all of his people. lastly, christian built a mindset of inner peace and personal joy. he was happy with who he was and what he was doing in the world, and his mental strength reflected that. as father michael himes once said, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (himes). it’s clear throughout christian’s life that his true joy came from his work in service and from his family. christian loved his family more than anything in the world, and he would have done anything for their happiness. his joy stemmed from his work in politics as well. research shows that the best medicine for oneself is often helping others, and christian devoted his entire tenure in public service to serving those in america who needed aid the most. his joy radiated from his person, making it easy to see that christian was at peace with himself and his surroundings. though he often struggled with anxiety and depression early in his life, christian eventually found ways to become mentally stronger and overcome his personal problems as well. he realized early on that too much self-reflection leads to “less satisfaction in his jobs and relationships”, as well as “less control in his life” (eurich). by the time of his presidency, christian exuded strength and confidence in his role. i now invite the audience here today to take a deep breath and relax. if you can, try and push the sadness of chiristian’s death out of your head for the moment. a wealth of evidence shows that clearer thinking can be fostered by setting aside time where people are not to be disturbed (lyer), by others or by mental anguish. christian’s death was indeed sad, but he would not want anyone in the crowd today to linger on their loss. in christian’s will, just after revealing that the majority of his vast wealth will go to building the “trzeciak family hall '' as the 33rd dormitory of notre dame, christian wrote to his closest family and friends to carry on his legacy of philanthropy. he claimed that everyone in his family had a duty to continue the same work that christian had devoted his life to, and the same thing applies to everyone here today. it’s our duty, as a service to christian’s great legacy, to make positive change in the world. works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau week one “hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau week two “three key questions” by father michael himes moreau week three “navigating your career journey” by the meruelo center for career development moreau week four “discerning a life well-lived” by irish compass moreau week five “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration 3 tom o’connor reflections on a life well lived we gathered here today to remember the way that tom lived his life. he was a busy man, but he always made time to reflect. he always remembered that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape”(“why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer”moreau fye week 1). whenever he was stressed or going through hard times, he would reflect and meditate in order to ensure that he kept a good mentality. he knew the importance of taking time for himself in order to live a healthier life. however, while tom made sure to reflect often, he made sure to do it the correct way. he made sure to ask the correct questions when reflecting since he knew that “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich-moreau fye week 6). he knew that it was more important for him to focus on the present and future rather than becoming stuck in the past. he understood that he could not change the past, so he understood that it was more important to focus on what he can control. however, he still understood that it was important for him to remember events of the past in order to learn from past experiences in order to shape his future. he always tried to treat others well regardless of what they believed. he always remembered how hesburgh said “mr president, we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we were all fishermen”(hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). he understood that we are all humans created under the image of god regardless of our political or religious beliefs. he tried his hardest in order to ensure that everyone he interacted with was treated fairly. he knew the importance of acting justly, and he https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 made this his mission. whenever he saw someone being left out, he would make his best effort to include that person. tom acted with love and tenderness. as pope francis said “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility. “(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). tom understood that it took a strong person to treat others well. oftentimes, people associate violence with strength, but he understood that being a loving and accepting person is the mark of a strong character. this is why he would act with tenderness, humility, and most importantly, love. he lived out the golden rule of treating others the way he would want to be treated. tom made a difference in the world through his career. he chose to use his talents in engineering in order to contribute to saving the environment from climate change. when choosing his career he kept the idea of the need of the community in mind: “what is it that the community requires, that i am able to supply? we need to be able to listen to others about their needs”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes-moreau fye week 3). while he had a passion for engineering, he also paid close attention to what he felt his community needed during his career. he decided that it was important to him and to his community that he and others worked on a solution to the climate change crisis. this was a good career for tom since he enjoyed his job because of his love for engineering, and he made positive contributions to his community and to society at large. in order to select to study engineering in order to enable his career, tom had to consider a few different factors. he kept in mind that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’”(“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services-moreau https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ fye week 4). he realized that careers are not one size fits all. one career that works well for someone’s talents may not work for another person’s skill set. from this he realized that his talents are in the stem field, so he decided to select to study engineering since he felt that it was the best major for him. this decision was integral to his ability to work towards a climate change solution, so he found that as his life went on, he made the correct decision. another factor that helped him decide his career path was a conversation with his good friend (moreau fye week 5). this conversation helped him realize his talents in order to be able decide which major would work best for him. he understood what was important to him and what he was passionate about through this conversation with his friend. his friend told him that he saw his passion and interest in math and science and recommended that he chose engineering. he knew that tom wanted to make a positive impact on the world, and he reasoned that engineering would enable tom to do just that. there is no such thing as living a perfect life, but many strive to live a life well lived. i believe that tom has achieved this goal through the way he acted throughout his life. he strived to treat others with love and kindness. he chose a career that strived to help the community rather than taking a higher paying but less moral job. he savored every moment of his life and was at peace with his life during his final hours. he was a man of religion and acted in accordance with god. for these reasons, i believe that tom has certainly lived a good life. integration 1 lindell my beliefs in and for the future recognizing your own beliefs is one thing. being able to confidently vocalize them is an entirely other task. we are incredibly complicated beings as people, such that there are many times when we cannot understand or justify our own thoughts and actions. despite these limitations and many more, i’m going to attempt to vocalize my current beliefs in regards to the previous assignments as well as provide background from my experiences and the previous weeks’ assignments. in week one, we discussed searching for belonging, and vulnerability. in response to dr. brown in her talk, saying “you cannot selectively numb emotion. when you numb [hard feelings] you numb joy, you numb gratitude, you numb happiness” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i wondered if it was ever appropriate to numb vulnerability. i believe that there are times when it is better to feel nothing at all over any emotions. a couple weeks before this, i had a gum infection cleaned out without anesthesia and it was excruciatingly painful. the small talk and connections i made with the surgeon and their assistants was nice, but i don’t know if it justifies not forgetting the experience altogether by undergoing anesthesia. in week two, another ted talk speaker concluded, “nothing that’s worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). i believe that brooks, the speaker of the ted talk, is incorrect in his conclusion. or rather, that he could have phrased it better. i say this because things like making friends, and experiencing happiness are things that are achievable in our lifetime, and i believe that these things are worth doing. i also believe that ‘success’ as many people put it, is poorly recognized. i found a similar issue with the week five video, where clara harris gives a graduation speech to notre dame graduates (“laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five). my issue is that the ‘success’ is seen as one achievement, as one ‘thing’ that the person has accomplished. i found a similar issue in academic awards at my high school as well as my high school graduation. by https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/modules/items/107140 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/modules/items/107140 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 presenting these things as one ‘achievement’ it not only misrepresents the days, or years of work that the students have put in, it also devalues the work of the students who didn’t get an award. even though the awards mean basically nothing in the long run, so much value is placed on the idea of these awards, that it feels like a failure when you don’t get one. in my senior year, i was the best student in my higher level math class, the most difficult class my school had to offer, so when the high school awards night came around, and i didn’t get the award, i was crushed. it had felt like all of my hard work had been for naught. i felt robbed, and was visibly upset. later that night, i saw an email from the math teacher the day before saying that because i had won the award in previous years, despite my academic excellence, they wanted to recognize other students. to me, this highlights both sides of the issue. with academic awards, or similar single event achievements, you get people who feel entitled to them, maybe rightfully so, who if they don’t get them, can feel as though their work was invalid, causing them to potentially not try as hard, or at all, in the future. on the other hand there are people who never get recognized even if they work really hard and show meteoric growth. if they can’t compete with other people, the awards offer them nothing. i believe that this issue is present in many other aspects of our lives. i considered deleting much of the above paragraph because i was concerned that it doesn't meet the arbitrary ‘reference every week of moreau’ requirement of the assignment, and the fact that that thought crossed my mind upsets me. i believe that we notre dame, my high school, and our society in generalplace too much emphasis on numbers and grades to the point where we have lost sight of the learning that the grades are meant to gauge. i have no issues talking about any ideas, talking about the christian god, or faith, or political issues, or philosophical ideologies, or inequalities that do or don’t apply to me, or anything else for that matter. this is because i want to learn. i believe that the learning and the knowledge is meant to be the takeaway form all of this. i also, however, recognize the value of getting grades, and won’t needlessly sacrifice a grade just to prove a point because that’s a waste of time and resources that people have put into me. in the discussion class for week three, we discussed faith, and i was very pleased when some of my classmates brought up how faith is not inherently connected to a god, or the christian god, as this is a belief that i personally have. i don’t know whether there is any type of higher being, but i have faith in myself and others and that’s good enough to get me through each day (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). in week four we discussed toxic relationships, the article specifically defined healthy relationships as “one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). it made me wonder, what does it mean to be on a path toward becoming a better person? and is this necessary if the friendship makes you happy? these questions stemmed from my relationships with my friends and rotc. in rotc, the experience is difficult and causes me a lot of stress and grief. however, i am experiencing a lot of growth as a result of these struggles. with my friends, i am much happier, but i am growing differently, in some ways that i believe many might consider less valuable than the growth from rotc. i am getting to a point where i’m going to have to choose whether or not i want to stay and spend more time in rotc or leave rotc and find experiences with my friends. neither of these are bad options, but i don’t know what i want to do right now, and i’ll have to eventually decide. it’s like what i wrote in my where i’m from poem (“where i'm from” by george ela lyon moreau fye week six): “my path is a surprise to those who thought they knew me my path leads to the unknown into the branching paths of life” just like what we talked about in the discussion week seven, the only way to combat implicit biases is to listen and learn, to gain more experience (“how to think about 'implicit bias'” by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris moreau fye week seven). i know that there are so many things in my future that https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ i currently can’t even dream of, and i believe that as i cut into that future, i need to keep an open mind, listen and learn, and grow as i experience life, wherever it may take me. week 14capstone integration three week 14 capstone integration three moreau fye i have always considered myself an advocate for what i believed in. more specifically, i considered myself an advocate for women’s rights. being a woman, i had my own experiences with gender inequality and clear displays of disrespect. they began small, teachers asking for “strong boys” to help lift chairs, and then they grew into cat calls, dismals, and never ending microaggressions. i saw myself as someone who advocated against such treatment as a feminist–but up until now this has only applied to injustices that happen to me or people i know. me and my friends and family are not the only women being subjective to unacceptable treatment, and that is why i am making it my mission to become a feminist advocate for all women. i may have had my personal experiences with being a woman, but there are plenty who are struggling in silence much more than me. they deserve to be heard and i am going to be one of the people that will make sure they are heard and given justice. notre dame says it best when in its mission statement it states, “notre dame also has a responsibility to advance knowledge in a search for truth through original inquiry and publication.” ( university of notre dame mission statementmoreau fye week thirteen) by i have an opportunity to enact real change as i become an adult , and notre dame has opened doors for such growth through clubs and consistent guest lecturers that will provide insight and knowledge that i will then share with the world. feminism may be an uphill battle but i will be someone on the front lines so that women can one feel equal, safe, and strong. i must always keep in mind that “it’s not a one-step process” so i must resist being discouraged and continue moving forward, no matter how long my mission takes. “navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four) that does not mean i won’t be faced with hardship. in fact, a big part of my mission statement stems from the experiences i have both been through and heard about. however, i turn to dean g. marcus cole’s words as he stated, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' | news | the law school | university of notre dame” by dean g. marcus colemoreau fye week twelve). i have so many opportunities and networks given to me as a notre dame student, and my mission is to use them to advocate for women and get involved in the feminist movement. being a student also means that i have much to learn. while i consider myself well-versed in feminism and the fight for women’s equality, there are many others who have been fighting much longer than i have. they have seen and done things that i have yet to, and their wisdom can only help me prosper. after all, “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story, if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week two). i cannot expect to succeed without having a good amount of trial and error, for that is life. mailto:dsikora@nd.edu http://nd.edu/about/mission http://nd.edu/about/mission https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moving on, one of the most important things about my mission is to be one with the people. feminism is about all of the emopowered women’s voices to be heard and respected, not just one. it is important for me to always work for and with all the people, for “we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponent is accurate and well-thought out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers.” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr, paul blaschkomoreau week eleven). i can only truly succeed at my mission with constant inclusivity and the ability to listen to all that come my way. if there should come a time where i find myself not remaining open to the influences of those around me, i turn to professor steve reifenberg as he reflects on his trip to south america. i was particularly struck when he said, “for all my mistakes, something worked well in our time together, and a little like the character in moliere who discovered to his astonishment that he had been speaking prose all his life, i’ve realized that we have been on a journey accompanying one another for a long time.” (teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, january 25, 2021.docx by steve reifenburgmoreau fye week nine). the idea that we have all been journeying together for much longer than we know is crucial for my mission to advocate for women. we as women have been going through a shared inequality, so i will strive to treat everyone i meet as a companion and fellow journey member. as i consider the idea of shared experiences and ideals, i turn to dr. d’angelo as she stated, “this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the u.s. today if one ignores group power relations.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism robin diangelo” by dr. robin d’angelomoreau fye week ten) although she was referring to another global issue, i think maintaining my theme of “open mindedness” can apply to numerous aspects of my mission to advocate for women. i must consider the dynamics of the multitude of groups, be it for or against my mission, and be able to shift perspectives to understand all sides of the issue. i think a big part of my mission relies on the big picture. feminism is a movement much bigger than this campus–it’s international. therefore, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives |” by pico iyermoreau week one) i must always look towards the bigger movement, and allow it to guide me as i take strides towards my mission. with so much to keep in mind, it may seem difficult to have so much to consider, while also remaining on a steady path towards my mission. that being said, as i work towards my mission, i must always take note of my sense of self. tasha eurich’s words come to mind as she states, “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) | by tasha eurich-moreau week six). if i hope to always check in with myself to be able to be strong for others. of course, that could quickly become a burden. that’s why i hope to recognize this mission as a part of my purpose. when i feel as though i am getting lost in all that is going on around me, i like to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ remember that “through the darkness of today's conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around.” (his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven). my friend kacper once told me that i was able to help him through an uncomfortable social situation by simply showing him i was there for him, making him feel as though he can be more confident and branch out. i think back to moments such as those if i ever feel as though i am not doing enough because you never know how far something small can go for someone. all in all, while my mission is to advocate for women and equality, i hope to be able to inspire others in the process, and help them find their own mission. i would like to show the other people around me that “no one but you can say this is my joy. you must discover this for yourself!”("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three). i found my joy with this mission, and i will do everything in my power to pursue it. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202/download?download_frd=1 microsoft word zhao_annie_week8_integration.docx annie zhao professor oswald moreau fye 4 march 2022 the calm, relaxed life of annie zhao it’s hard to think about what my legacy will be when i am still so young. as a first-year student in college, i still do not know what i want study, where i want to live, who i want in my life. these questions make it difficult for me to wonder about what my eulogy will say. but no matter what, i suppose that if i die with no regrets, if i did satisfied with how i lived my life, i can have no complaints. i suppose the following is how i would like people to see my life: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) when annie was younger, she focused too much on the small, microscopic aspects of my life and found it difficult to get a macroscopic perspective on where she stood and where she needed to improve. she needed to start thinking long-term, rather than getting crazy about tiny, short-term events and their consequences. she needed to stop looking at the different parts of my life as separate entities and realize that they are all interconnected and come together as one, my life. she used to a life of fast-facts, multitasking, and squeezing time as much as she could. she was not retaining most of the information she was cramming into my mind, and annie lost out on a lot of social quality time and on joining fun clubs. she then started taking more study breaks to spend more time with her friends and picked up some smarter homework habits. slowly, she started retaining more information in the long term and spent more time with her friends. “he did a lot of things people did not think was priestly. he was entrepreneurial.” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two) annie truly inspired change in the right direction just as father hesburgh did. although she did not have as large of an impact like he did, she changed the lives of the people around her in a significant way, even if it was small. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she stated. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die by ruth graham – moreau fye week three) one of the greatest inner battles annie struggled with was the battle between living in the moment and living for the future. on the one hand, tomorrow is not promised, and she obviously did not want to spend my last few hours doing homework. on the other hand, her chances of dying the next day were slim, and she knew she would regret not working hard in college. annie found a balance in between that ruth graham expresses, that of which we keep death in mind so that we don’t solely do dreadful activities, but we do not lose sight of our goals and ambitions. until annie’s last day, she lived every day without regrets. “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices.” (navigating your career journey – moreau fye week four) annie never had clear vips. she valued spending her time wisely and being financially stable. she valued using my time and skills doing what she wanted to do, not what people told her to do. “annie always had a passion for the inequality in education and opportunities based on race and class, even if she didn’t know it at first” (conversation with friend, february 20th, 2022, week 5) she made lots of money as a software engineer and retired pretty early. with some passive income, annie travelled the world with her husband and her pets, learning from different cultures and experiences. in her free time, annie journaled about her life, and later that journal would be refined and published into one of the best-selling nonfiction novels of this century. in addition, she was on the board for multiple companies that focused on providing higher quality education to children at a young age. when it came to emotions, annie realized at a young age that understanding what she felt rather than delving on why she felt a certain way contributed to her well-being much better. “in other words, we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started. ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich– moreau fye week six) annie was always a lot happier not thinking about the reasons she felt a certain way. she wondered if she would end up knowing herself less by not thinking about the why’s, but she felt better, and what could be better than feeling happy? annie often found herself in a dilemma of analyzing her every move or just moving through the motions. part of her always felt like if she did not analyze myself, she would not know herself at all, and every day would turn into a blur. on the other hand, when she just at in the moment, feeling what she needed to feel without turning that feeling into anything more than it is, she was happier. annie thus concluded that a life worth lived is a combination of the what’s and the why’s: not living in ignorance of actions, but also not overthinking everything. there are some places where what’s are important and some where why’s are important. lastly, annie led a life well lived within the communities she found herself in. "let us help each other, all together, to remember that the “other” is not a statistic, or a number” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis– moreau fye week seven). we hear so many statistics about other people, like how many people in a state are illiterate, how accessible food is to students. but because we may not be included in this statistic, we do not feel the immediate reality of it. but when you meet somebody in this category, everything feels a bit more tangible. you’re more empathetic. you remember that these percentages represent human beings. with this thought in mind, annie made sure never to treat an issue like a statistic; she humanized everything. to annie, the relationships of a life well-lived obviously included her immediate circle of friends and family, but she also built relationships with strangers that she never met. she became part of a larger community and developed kinship with people she had nothing in common with. she affected people in ways she never would have imagined for the better. she ultimately felt connected with the surroundings of her life, which made her life well lived. moreau writing week 8 (integration 3) nuss 1 thigpen moreau fye 4 march 2022 my life well lived i wish to live a long and fulfilling life, so that when i die, i will have had a life well-lived. however, it is difficult to define what exactly constitutes a life well-lived. the lessons from this semester of moreau fye have allowed me to gain a better understanding of how i can get the most out of my life. one of the most significant things that i can do to achieve fulfillment is to set aside distractions and focus on things that are important to me. i feel that this is a relevant problem for a lot of people in today’s world due to the overwhelming presence of technology and social media. it is easy to sacrifice productivity for immediate entertainment. i know that this is a problem that i struggle with every day, and realize that distractions like these can prevent me from focusing on the things that are important in life. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in order to gain a greater appreciation for the good things in life, one has to take the time to step away from interruptions and distractions. i believe that centering my life around real goals will help me avoid distractions and accomplish things that are meaningful to me. i think that the life of father hesburgh is a very good example of a life well-lived. throughout his years, hesburgh took part in many influential moments in history. usually, he acted as a mediator between two sides that refused to speak to each other, since “...[h]e didn’t really belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” (quote from “hesburgh” by ted koppel moreau fye week two). i think that this attribute is important to have because it allows for people to communicate and listen to each other, which results in progress being made. i hope to hold this virtue throughout my life so that i will be able to freely create my own opinions without following a group mindset. i’d imagine that people regret instances in which they didn’t speak up during tense situations, so i want to ensure i form logical opinions and make them known when there is conflict. throughout my life, i will eventually reach milestones where i have to make important life decisions. i know that i’m currently in the process of one right now, that being my selection of major. then, when i graduate in 2025, i’ll decide how to start my career path. throughout the process of navigating any major decision i will face in my life, i think that it will help to remember fr. michael himes’s three key questions, which guide me in contemplating what brings me joy, what i’m good at, and what others need. an ideal career will enable me to do https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 nuss 2 something that i enjoy and am good at in order to serve others. it is very important that my career brings me joy because “contentment is an obstacle. joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i intend to explore multiple careers throughout my life, so that i will find one that inspires me to work hard in order to help other people. another method of selecting a field of study or career path is to familiarize myself with my personal vips (values, interests, personality, and skills). i also hope to utilize all of the career-related resources here at notre dame, so that i can confidently choose a path when the time comes. however, i know that this kind of discernment extends throughout my entire life because “career development is a process and a journey. if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i plan to fully engage in this process so that i am satisfied with my work career at the end of my life. even with all the resources available, discernment at any point in life can be daunting and stressful. however, i know that i can turn to my family if i need any additional help during the process. my parents know me very well, so they are familiar with my strengths and weaknesses, and can tell if i’m interested or disinterested in a certain option. i found that it is helpful to have others try to point out things they notice about me, since they have an outside perspective on how i behave in certain situations. i learned that i appear most engaged when i am trying new things when i spoke with my dad about my interests for the moreau fye week five assignment. whenever i face an important decision in my life, i feel confident discussing it with my parents, since it provides me with insight as well as moral support. i think that the way in which i respond to challenges and obstacles makes a significant difference in my happiness and my overall satisfaction with my life. it is easy to dwell on bad things and become disappointed because of things we don’t have. however, by taking the time to appreciate the good things in life, one is able to improve their mindset and find joy. as it is said by dr. jihoon kim, “i encourage all of us to just focus what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by dr. jihoon kim moreau fye week six). in the video that this quote appears in, we learn that dr. kim was left with most of his body paralyzed after a snowboarding accident. despite all that he lost, he learned to appreciate all the things he can still do, and has found peace within himself. i hope to be able to sustain this mental attitude throughout my life, and react positively to any challenge. i will no doubt encounter countless setbacks throughout my life, but they can all be overcome if i remain optimistic. in order to create a life well-lived, i will ensure that i never lose hope in the face of adversity. the final component of a life well-lived is the presence of meaningful relationships, since “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/468294?module_item_id=143819 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript nuss 3 holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). it is imperative for people to serve those who are in need. a life well-lived involves making the world a better place, and the world is made a better place when suffering is alleviated. the state of humanity can be improved by showing tenderness through taking time to understand the needs of others and providing care and comfort. an example this takes the form of homeboy industries, a gang rehabilitation center run by fr. greg boyle. this institution provides jobs and second chances for those wanting a better life. i hope to show this amount of compassion for everyone throughout my life, so that i can make a difference in the world. final moreau professor kelly fys moreau april 29, 2022 legacy lifestyle the main goal i have for my life is to leave such a legacy that i will continue to live when i pass away. “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull”(three key questions, fr. michael himes-moreau week 3). being successful for me means changing the world for the better. i am a christian, and i believe there is a god and heaven to go to after i die. i want to serve god and do what i think is my purpose on earth. i want to help others in ways like donating to charities, talking to the youth, training athletes, and creating programs that will continue to do so. speaking to the youth and training athletes will be my way of growing wisdom and passing down knowledge. i feel it is my responsibility to teach the generation after me how to have a positive impact on the world. i must lead by example by being courageous, kind, and having a solid character. when i say courageous, i am illustrating somebody always doing the right thing no matter if people are on your side or against you. knowing that whatever the outcome may be, god will bless you if you do the right thing, and you won’t have to suffer. i came to the university of notre dame to grow wisdom. the people i have already met at notre dame have made me a better person. in the video “how to avoid an echo chamber”( paul blaschkomoreau week eleven), it states, “by surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re possibly losing the sense of how someone may respectfully disagree with us.” i’ve always been taught to surround myself with people smarter than me, stronger than me, and more skilled than me. being around these types of people will ultimately push me to my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147382 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147382 maximum potential. but first, you have to know yourself. “your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices.”(navigating your career journey”(meruelo family center for career development-moreau week four). if you don’t want to lose sight of your journey or purpose, you must know what you want for yourself and the people you want to be around. these types of relationships will go a long way. meeting new people isn’t for everyone. still, i have learned how to embrace humanity. in notre dame’s “a guide to student’s life”(moreau week ten), it states, “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.” knowing this entering a new school was comforting. not all schools have the same atmosphere and culture notre dame has. it makes this school unique, and i have no doubt in my mind that the kids graduating from here will impact the world for the better. to begin my college journey, something i have always been able to use as an advantage that i plan to continue is my ability to relax during any situation. keeping a calm mind will allow you to make the right decisions and enjoy life a little more. an article i read states, “it’s been found by scientists that meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains.”(why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer, tedmoreau fye week one). many people don’t understand this, and it makes their life so much harder. when you have a few hours of free time, use it to meditate or stay still. keeping my mind at ease is what i use to connect to god and think about life in its entirety. when you feel like the world is falling apart, remember to trust in god. this idea is demonstrated in the article why the only future worth building includes everyone (by pope francismoreau week 7). it states, “through the darkness of today's conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around.” if you have faith in god, the dark times will never overcome you. in week twelve, i read an article that quotes, “god so loved the world that he sent his only son that we might 1have life and have it abundantly(constitutions of the congregation of holy cross).” i understood this quote as there is nothing we should be afraid to do in this world because of our faith in god. with god’s presence, you will never feel alone. “compassion is not only to suffer for the other, but it is also to be in sympathy with another.”(a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg -moreau week nine). when i have to walk across campus during the snow days at notre dame or go through a challenging workout, i will be able to remain strong because i know god won’t fail me. i understand there will be many obstacles throughout these next few years, but i know what it takes to overcome them. i never blame myself during hard times because i know everything happens for a reason. with this mindset, i don’t spend time asking why. an article i read states, “your brain may misdirect you to the first available explanation” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way), by tasha eurichmonreau week six). instead, i ask, “how will i get past this tough time? it’s a far more productive question to ask yourself. reflecting on my journey so far, i am proud of where i am and how i got here, but i am eager to continue improving. i’ve kept my morals in line with my passions and have been able to help people around me. my biggest goal is to provide generational wealth for the young kids of my community. although i am very blessed, i want to be the tool for kids that i didn’t have growing up. i want to erase all bad habits like procrastination and laziness because those are my https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ most significant weaknesses. having intrinsic motivation all the time is one of the most valuable things you can have. i will continue to build my legacy so that when i leave this world. integration three maria alexandra sheppard maria alexandra sheppard moreau fye integration three i promise it will be great a letter to my younger self… as i sit down in my o�ce after a successful surgery to write to my younger self, i cannot help but wonder all the di�erent things i went through, the wonderful people i have encountered, and the personal growth that have led me to where i am today. we usually hear quotes like “you got this”, “the sky is not the limit”, and my personal favorite, “life is what you make it”. from that last one, i can assure it is definitely true. our lives are constantly surrounded by movement, energy, ups and downs, but after all this time, i consider myself an expert at stepping back and analyzing what life is really all about, as well as what can i achieve, keeping in mind that it is really what i make out of it. i know at times it can be frustrating not having all the answers and control over most of the things in life, but that is the game, that is the key. not having control of things allows us to explore and grow, here is what i have learned… i promise it will be great but step one is to step back, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why do we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). stepping back can be tempting because you can feel as though you are staying behind but in reality it will make you step forward because we do not have a clear vision of our lives a hundred percent of the time. i know you are probably wondering why in the world am i suggesting to “step back” when all you can do is go fast, do not stop, and thrive for success. wrong. that’s just not it, mari. in reality, going with the mainstream of humanity, a fast-paced society, blocks the true meaning and purpose behind everything you do! cars that run fast, eventually get slower and slower, in that same way, a movie that starts and it’s filled with suspense moments and conflicts, eventually comes to an end, whatever that end is and represents. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ i promise it will be great but you cannot give up on yourself and wonder what would have happened if i have tried this, or if i have done this. . things do not get easier, what happens is that you grow. the key to growing though, lies in trusting yourself to the fullest, regardless of situations and di�culties. father ted’s sister said “you will never know if you do not try” (“hesburgh'' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i can recall, back in my college days, the amount of things i did not say or did not do all because of this fear, which up to this day cannot figure out what it was or what it meant. but, i can now speak my truth by expressing how good it feels to do something or say something without the fear of trying it! truth is, mentality and dedication are two simple words that make all of the di�erence between a life lived and a life well-lived. furthermore mari, raise your hand whenever you want to speak, dance whenever you want to dance, try new things, and try to not limit your life to the “what if’s”. i promise it will be great but you have to learn to appreciate things even more. life goes on so fast while people are focusing on tuesday’s presentation and friday’s job conference, rather than focusing on smiling with people you love and eating the foods you genuinely enjoy. to a certain point, i agree with what sister aletheia said, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three), as i said, to a certain point, she is right, we do have a limited amount of time, but instead of meditating and thinking about your death every single day of your life, multiply your life by meditating about the present and thinking about everything you are grateful for. that made a remarkable di�erence for me in my life. i am grateful for so many things and i hope you are too, in every single chapter of your life from now on. i promise it will be great but understanding and exploring a life well-lived is crucial for your development and growth. experiences vary, as you may know now that as a sixteen year old have been through situations that have challenged you and your intellectual virtues in di�erent https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html ways. but, trust me on this one mari, taking the positive side out of every experience will put you on top of your game and will allow you to engage with yourself even more, every step of the way. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four), they really do and if i am not mistaking, you will soon realize that. you will get diagnosed with cardiac arrhythmia in january 2019, and your life will be surrounded by all sorts of experiences. it will get pretty scary and rough, and taking in the positive side of experiences will be harder than ever, but it will get better and you will get stronger, i promise. i promise it will be great but know who your people are before it is too late. at this point in your life, people will come and go, but it is essential that you identify those that no matter what, no matter where, are there with you and for you. there is no one, other than yourself, that knows you more like mom does. she, as you know, is unique and incredible in so many ways, as a mom, person, woman, sister, daughter, you name it. but recognizing that she is your main circle, your main trustee, is essential for life, believe me, mother knows best! “no matter where you go, always rely on square one” (“discernment conversationactivity” with my mom, jeni�er espino moreau fye week five), and square one is whatever you need it to be, whoever you need it to be. quotes like this have shaped me into a better version of myself, counting on mom has been one of the greatest blessings i could have ever asked for in life. i promise it will be great but i will tell you right now, there are and will be a lot of things you will not be able to do or achieve, and although it sounds discouraging, focusing on things you can do and things you can achieve, will ultimately lead you towards a better perspective on what you want for you and your life. now, before and after every surgery, i have started to have this five-minute “thinking time”, focused on analyzing all that i am capable of, and it all started by blocking negative thoughts and letting free the positive ones, with a thousand and one possibilities. “i will utilize these five minutes and do something about it instead of just focusing on what i cannot do” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six), adversities are inevitable, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 challenges are always involved, but if you think about the “yes’s” instead of the “no’s”, you become unstoppable. i promise it will be great but there is one last step i would love for you to take in, life is usually painted around the fact that you should work on you, for you. but that is just closing the real panorama of it all, life is to be lived surrounded by others, providing what you gave to o�er to become a force of good, alongside everyone else. you are compassionate and you care about others, that is part of the reason why, spoiler alert, you will become a neurosurgeon, to impact the life of others for the better. “how wonderful would it be if solidarity, this beautiful and, at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic, and scientific choices, as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples, and countries” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven), an impactful quote pope francis stated as he explained the wonders that would come along if we implement not only the technologies and innovations that are taking place as of now but an increase in solidarity and other values that are essential to human nature, furthermore community. life as a whole is meant to be challenging, life is meant to challenge you. you have to allow yourself to be guided by life itself, let yourself go. it becomes frustrating at times, the amount of things and aspects of life which do not rely under your control. you wake up one day and out of the ten things that would happen that day, eight are not under your control. people say “live your life to the fullest” but they do not say “more than half of your life will be based on your reaction and coming over of several situations placed your way. and that’s it, that is the secret to it all, it is not about the amount of di�cult circumstances you are faced with, but rather how you face each and every one of them. ups and downs, and lefts and rights, but i promise it will be great, and trust me on that one. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration 4/29 how do i pursue a life well-lived? a well-lived life comes down to three questions that i ask myself every day, make sure i am on the right path toward living a well-lived life. the first question is, “am i making a change either to myself or someone else? the second question is, “did i learn anything from yesterday’s day? and if so, am i making changes to perfect that skill or problem? the last question is, “am i making my siblings follow a path of success, and if so, how do i need to make life better for them and future generations? these questions, i ask every day so i can keep check of the reality of life. as the nun graham stated, “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull.”(ruth graham by ny times moreau fye week 3) this for me states that materialistic materials wear off, aesthetics become old, and riches and power end when we die. however, what doesn’t die is the legacy and inspiration you leave during your journey in life. by knowing that i am inspiring others and have changed the world for the better am i living a well-lived life. “the things we are most comfortable at and the things we are most natural at are often our vocations…”(adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3 ) i orientate my life by having values that are connected to interests or qualities that attract me. personally, having values that feel naturally important to me, whether it's my family, financial success, or anything else of worth. i started asking myself questions such as: what do i love?, what matters to me? etc. however, in week 13 focus question i started asking myself, am i orienting my whole life toward happiness? i started understanding and listing my core values by distinguishing the difference between needs, wants, and values. there is a quote by rodin that goes, “nothing is a waste of time if you use the experience wisely.” i decided to choose to have my mission involve the change i want to create in the world. i concluded my mission statement; "to serve as a leader by encouraging design (architecture) and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 4/29 forward-thinking in low-income areas creating change that will improve the lives of others." i want to pursue a well-lived life by helping others and changing the environment/society around us. however, how can the others play a role in my discernment of a well-lived life? week 5 was a conversation that took place during the dillion hall retreat. the conversations were about ourselves and our connection to the catholic faith. we discussed silence being key to the understanding of god’s plan and discussed time management to connect with god on a deeper level. through the retreat, i came to understand and understood from others that i am a person who is against silence. i am a person who would rather use that time to help someone in need. i believe that what stretched my awareness of myself was that i grew up in an environment where helping others was a normal part of life. this environment taught me that by helping others i am fulfilling my plan for a well-lived life. i want to aid and help students and families from low-income areas financially, socially, and academically. i have understood that the latino community is in a limited situation and i would like to aid it. people like father hesburgh impacted many individuals and even changed many individuals for the better. i would like to become that person who can help and change the lives of others. i feel that there is still a major need in society. i want to help all as i will not discriminate nor judge as we are all human.“we are all created in the image of god, we are all equal in god’s eyes” (video: "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2) however, how can i grow my mission statement in an environment/ society that has greed and suffering? how can i act wiser when i don’t understand these situations? there is a quote from confucius who said that there were three ways to learn wisdom: "first, by reflection, which is noblest; second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 4/29 bitterest." wisdom is hard to define and yet somehow we know it when we see it. the wise people stay calm in a crisis. they recognize the limits of their knowledge, consider alternative perspectives, and remember that the world is always changing. so, how do you become wiser? the buddhist concept of "beginner's mind" refers to the approach of a person just starting, filled with the wonder of new learning, and being challenged anew by it. by keeping a curious and open mind rather than prejudging situations, we learn to keep our minds open and tell ourselves "i don't know what to expect," which will allow us to learn and gain wisdom. “we’re increasingly isolating into ideological bubbles the worry seems to be that in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree…” (video: “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week 11). when we cease to have a fixed idea of people, things, and situations surrounding us, we grow in wisdom by soaking up changes, and new ideas, and we become aware of the idea of not setting any person above or beneath us. however, how can i become wiser in an environment/society that limits and hinders my success? how can i act with more courage against these limitations? i can grow in my courage by acknowledging that courage; is taking action despite the fear you feel. courage is the willingness to respond fearlessly despite the anxiety and worry that might be tugging at you. one of the best ways to be courageous is to understand what you're afraid of and then refuse to allow that fear to paralyze you. because if you let it, fear has the power to stop you from moving forward, taking risks, and making the most of opportunities. “one thing that every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd 4/29 to expand our circles” (text: "dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean moreau fye week 12). being courageous allows you to take chances, pursue your dreams, get what you want out of life, and help those in need. one way that i act with courage is by maintaining a healthy perspective. i act with no judgment or separation from others. this mindset of acting against society takes courage and is the path toward achieving change in this world. how can i live a well-lived life if obstacles/limitations are all around? how we react and act against them will be determined by the amount of patience, discipline, knowledge, desire, and pain we are willing to invest. one of my obstacles is perfectionism. i grew up in an environment where if something was not done to its perfect form then it was incorrect. perfection became a killer of creativity and vitality in my life. however, i became conscious of the fact that no one is perfect nor anything for that matter. i understood that life is more than just a “perfect path”, and that on this path there will always be obstacles i must overcome. for me to have a well-lived life, i must go through failures. like in the grotto video with dr. kim, “but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering from god.” (video: “5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week 6 ) life is meant to be full of failures and not perfection as i once thought. life is full of pain and suffering but it is your determination that sets you apart from others. your determination is what makes you successful. there’s a quote that i like a lot that goes, “nothing ever goes as planned in this world. the longer you live, the more you realize that in this reality only pain, suffering, and futility exist.” how can i embrace a society where pain, suffering, and futility exist? in any case, i believe that for man to find a sense of contentment we should initially have self-empathy, an https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 4/29 acknowledgment of our common mankind. the feeling of sympathy springs from the acknowledgment that the human experience is blemished, that we are largely questionable. whenever we're in contact with our normal humankind, we recall that insecurities and frustration are general. this recognizes self-sympathy from self-centeredness. the aggravation i feel in troublesome times is the very aggravation that you feel in troublesome times. the triggers are unique, the conditions are unique, and the level of torment is unique, yet the essential experience is something similar. the acknowledgment of normal humankind involved by self-empathy additionally permits us to be seriously understanding and less critical about our insufficiencies. “i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either.” (text: "growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto moreau fye week 10). he experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest — a kind of optical delusion of consciousness. this delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our desires and affection for a few persons nearest to us. our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circle of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty. what if society doesn’t want to change? what if what we initially planned doesn’t go as follows? there is a famous anime quote that resonates with the week 9 topic of suffering and painful reality. it goes, "wake up to reality! nothing ever goes as planned in this world. the longer you live, the more you realize that in this reality, only pain, suffering, and futility exist. in this world, wherever there is light there are also shadows. as long as the concept of winners exists, there must also be losers. the selfish desire of wanting to maintain peace causes wars and hatred is born to protect love." i came to understand that unfortunately in this modern world we https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 4/29 live in, there will always be pain and suffering. where there are heroes, there are villains. where there is light, there is darkness. where there is peace there is death and harm. that is the true reality of society. i correlated with mr. reifenberg as he gave a different and new perspective on a world that is different from what we normally see on social media or the news. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, at the moment, what needed to be done.” (text: “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). people came together to aid him, not for love nor compassion but rather as a moral force. society needs to learn from each other, we need to help each other; not harm or destroy each other only for the sake of “peace” or prosperity. if we let our greed and selfish ideas and acts take control of our world, this world will crumble. how can we make relationships with others if there is a moral force rather than love or compassion for one another? our mentality of materialistic objects is limiting us from understanding the truth of today’s world. as pope francis states, “only by educating people to true solidarity will we be able to overcome the "culture of waste," which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people.” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences -moreau fye week 7). i agree with this statement as unfortunately, our society has grown focused on money and riches controlling how one must be seen or act. we have grown apart from the section of community and peace. we rather backstab others or force ourselves to help them to be “well-lived” or “happy.” we need to make a change, or else we will crumble. we need to understand what a well-lived is to live at peace with one another. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript 4/29 a well-lived life is one that had an impact whether big or small on society or even a single person. however, how can one know how to live a well-lived life? “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) i agree with this as rarely does one know exactly what they want to do as a career and in life. a teacher of mine once told me that during her college years it took her three years to finally decide on her specific career. although it took her more years than required she is now happy teaching calculus 1 to high schoolers. she didn’t let society or others' judgment let her go through a path that was not for her. unfortunately, in today's modern world many people work a job that they hate but are forced to work in them as they have no other choice. however, for me, the decision on what career i wanted to pursue was decided before i entered college. it was a decision that to this day i do not regret as it has been truly an experience for me and others. i want to help others and change the world. that begs the question. am i living a well-lived life? week 1 was crucial for my understanding of a well-lived life. my self-reflection allowed me to understand my thoughts, emotions, feelings, and activities. i needed to self-reflect on where and why i wanted to go in the future. where and why i wanted to change the world. and my conclusion was that it’s because of my family, friends, teachers, classmates, humanity, etc. i realized that these individuals are the reason why i want to make a change. i understood that i need to allow myself time to develop individually. i need time and space to shape and mold myself into someone that can truly help others in need. “the need for a space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (pico iyer by ted moreau fye week 1) i finalized that, i want to create change in the world. my mission statement states, "to serve as a leader by encouraging design (architecture) and forward-thinking in low-income 4/29 areas creating change that will improve the lives of others." i want to pursue a well-lived life by helping others and changing the environment/society around us. and i will do so with the people i love and the career that i love. microsoft word soza-integration three.docx soza 1 fr. kevin sandberg moreau first year experience, section 121 4 march 2022 how i can become a better leader now that my first semester as a college student is complete, i need to spend more time contemplating how i can use my strengths and talents to make the world a better place after i graduate from notre dame. my first semester of college revealed quite a bit about the way other people behave in difficult situations and when confronted with stressful circumstances. seeing how other individuals behaved allowed me to reflect upon my own behavior, trying to find ways for me to improve myself. as someone who has sought out leadership positions at different points in my life, these opportunities at college have allowed me to reflect upon what makes a good leader and what i can do to become a good leader. during the first few weeks of first semester, it was a bit overwhelming. i was living in a new state nearly 2000 miles from home. it seemed like there was always some extracurricular activity to participate in. in high school, i wrote for the school newspaper and competed on the debate team, but i prioritized my academic performance above all else. in the first few weeks of school, i realized that i was falling into the trap that deresiewicz observes is plaguing students throughout the world: “[s]tudents have been taught that that is all that education is: doing your homework, getting the answers, acing the test. nothing in their training has endowed them with the sense that something larger is at stake” (2014). deresiewicz also reports an observation from a student that suggests “i’ve seen my peers sacrifice health, relationships, exploration, activities that can’t be quantified and are essential for developing souls and hearts, for grades and resume soza 2 building” (2014). while i may have felt like i way falling into that trap, i knew that i needed to focus on balancing extracurricular activities and academics because education is only a means to achieve a temporary end like a job. there are more important things that exist in the world such as friendships. while i may have felt myself overfocused on my academics in the first few weeks of the year, my faith helped me to escape from this trap. my catholic faith is very important to me because faith was not always easy for me. i questioned my faith when i was confronted with various health issues. i resonated with pope francis’s commentary on the value of hope: “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (2017). when i struggled with my faith, i fell away from god because i was too consumed with the results that would come from my prayers. however, when i came to realize that god works in ways that are not always understandable, i changed my outlook toward faith. being at notre dame has allowed me to strengthen my faith and become a more faithful catholic because of the countless opportunities offered on campus. my experiences with faith influence the way i view introspection. faith can be an intensely personal thing, or it can be something someone experiences with many other people. faith encompasses not only the bedtime prayers but also the communal bible study sessions. i believe faith and introspection are related because both activities can occur personally or with a group. furthermore, in both settings, individuals can become sidetracked and lose the true purpose of their actions and motivations. when an individual engages in self-introspection, thinking about oneself for an extended period “can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of soza 3 certainty that we’ve identified the real issue” (eurich, 2017). similar problems can also arise in group settings. in his speech to the united states military academy, deresiewicz discusses the value of friendship in introspection, observing “one of the best ways of talking to yourself is by talking to another person” (deresiewicz, 2009). talking with someone else can allow an individual “to allow you to acknowledge things--to acknowledge things to yourself--that you otherwise can't. doubts you aren't supposed to have, questions you aren't supposed to ask. feelings or opinions that would get you laughed at by the group or reprimanded by the authorities” (deresiewicz, 2009). these realizations can be good, but they rely upon having a good mentor. having a good mentor is the key to meaningful group introspection. as parks observes, “the art of mentoring is located, in part, in assessing the readiness of the protégé to recognize and creatively respond to heretofore unseen opportunities, ideas, dangers, relationships, and solutions” (2000). if a mentor is unable to get that mentee to recognize these things, then the mentee will fail to gain any meaningful insights; instead, the person will be trapped in a state of confusion and doubt. however, a good mentor can be invaluable. good mentors can get an individual to reorient one’s mindset for the better: as someone who is being mentored, it is important to have “[t]he humility to hear what we are good at and the humility to hear what we are not good at” because these observations present crucial opportunities for growth (himes). as i move forward at the end of my freshman year of college, i know that i want to positively change the world to propagate my values. coming to notre dame is one of the first experiences i have had where i do not feel like i have to self-censor. growing up in los angeles, being outspokenly catholic and conservative was far from the norm and likely to inspire scrutiny and social stigma. however, these experiences have motivated me to be authentic to myself and soza 4 focus on promoting good in the world. i resonated with deresiewicz’s description of what the world needs in order to enact good: “people who can think for themselves. people who can formulate a new direction: for the country…. people, in other words, with vision” (deresiewicz, 2009). as i go forward, i want to change the world to ensure that every child has access to a quality education regardless of zip code and that the unborn are treated with respect. seeing the way that my values have been trampled in past decades, i am committed to restoring them regardless of the cost. i was influenced by himes’s commentary on joy: “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied. it is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you—to a new decision and to a new way of living” (himes). although i am only in my second semester of college, i, with the help of these readings from the moreau first year experience course, recognize that in order to make a difference in the world i must engage in meaningful introspection and find individuals willing to mentor me on my journey. i cannot get distracted by my own thoughts that cloud my judgment. i must realize the priorities i have and work tirelessly to achieve them. professor pruitt moreau integration 3 2 march 2022 living life for others was born on april 17th, 2003 to her parents leslie and harry kemp. she was the oldest of her four siblings, and was a true role model for those around her. she was someone who had a passion for what she did as well as embraced all that life gave to her. she did not shy back from a challenge and was willing to help anyone in any way that she could. the tragedy of her death allows us to recognize how grateful we all are to have had the chance to know her. she was a blessing in each and every one of our lives, and she taught us how to live truly joy-filled lives. one thing that mattered to elizabeth most in life were the people that she cared for. her family and friends were those who were always there for her, and in the same way, she did all she could to be there for them. it was clear that her relationships with others were something that brought her the most joy in life. in a ted talk about relationships and inclusiveness by pope francis, he uses the quote, “life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). this quote rang true in elizabeth’s life. her relationships were a necessity in her life and she made a constant effort to ensure they remained in her life. whether it be a visit, a phone call, or a quick text before an important event, elizabeth always had the people she loved on her mind. she also cared heavily for their opinion and looked to them for ways she could improve herself. her mom, leslie, recalls a time in college when she called and asked her some questions for an assignment, one being “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fys week 5) leslie remembers elizabeth taking what she said to heart about taking time to slow down and to truly be proud of her accomplishments. elizabeth loved having these types of conversations, and well as hearing what her friends and family desired their lives to look like. elizabeth was hard-working, and made a consistent effort to reach the goals she set for herself. whether it be school in her early days, work, or her personal life, elizabeth knew what she wanted to achieve and who she wanted to become. not only was she successful in her career, but she worked to live a good life and become the best version of herself. throughout her time at notre dame, elizabeth had the opportunity to learn about one of their most influential presidents, fr. theodore hesburgh. he was hardworking and determined and took advantage of the opportunities he was given, once saying, “i had my shot, i did what i had to do” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fys week 2). he had remarkable opportunities, and used each and every one of them to make a positive difference in the world. in the same way. elizabeth saw the opportunities to grow and took advantage of them every chance she got. she knew that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) these opportunities presented themselves to her in her schooling, career, and thorough one of her favorite activities traveling. influenced heavily by her parents' love of travel, elizabeth took every chance she could to explore the world, her favorite places having visited being israel and england. she also took opportunities she had to serve others through tutoring or working at homeless shelters. elizabeth recognized that the opportunities she was given were not ones that everyone had, and kept a mindset of gratitude throughout her life. when faced with conflict, elizabeth did not back down. when she was younger, she struggled with blaming herself for issues that she had. however, a mentality she learned to adopt was when faced with difficulty asking herself “what” she was feeling rather than “why” she was feeling that way. (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fys week 6) through doing this, she was able to figure out ways to overcome the challenges as well as maintain her self-confidence. in the midst of struggles, elizabeth was able to remain at peace with herself and her abilities while working through problems. despite the business of her life, elizabeth made a consistent effort to slow down and take time for herself. she believed that, “the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week 1). she recognized that when she took that time for herself she was able to put what she was going through in perspective and work through what was going on whether it be good or bad. this then allowed her to continue to grow in virtue and work toward living her good life. in addition to this, she used her free time to do little things for others, like pick them up a coffee before work or deliver baked goods. looking back on the life of elizabeth, it is clear what mattered to her most in life: her family and friends, and finding any way she could to help others. while we mourn this loss, it is essential that we continue to celebrate and remember her legacy and live in the joy that she surrounded herself with. as fr. michael himes once said, “joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to extend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). elizabeth would want us to remember this quote and as we go from here and push ourselves to become the best version of ourselves. let us remember to remain in the joy that we felt in her presence and the joy she lived her life with. moreau 2 integration 1 pepe 1 professor hnatusko moreau fye 04 march 2022 achieving success, even in death while life can incorporate just about any mix of events and experiences, there is one thing that almost everyone holds with common value: the desire to live a good life. the sad truth is that life is extremely short, and therefore, it can be difficult to accomplish what makes a life meaningful in such a short amount of time. the other difficulty in this common goal is that almost everyone views a life worth living differently; it’s an opinionated and personalized feat that we are forced to figure out on our own. therefore, the best way to make sense of all the differing opinions in our world, and assure we are on a path to satisfaction in life that makes sense for us, is to define a standard for ourselves. personally, i believe i would die a happy man if i lived by the following standards: balance ambition and relaxation, consistently contemplate and reevaluate in a healthy manner, and engage in connection with others and forming relationships. i believe that one of the largest factors in living a life well lived is finding a good balance of ambition and relaxation. often, life can be consumed by nonstop action, which breeds a state where we are only satisfied if we are constantly doing something, or entertaining ourselves in some way. while we may not realize the dangers of this addiction to continuous stimulation, philosopher blaise pascal discerns that, “all the unhappiness of men arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ pepe 2 lyer moreau fye week one). in this way, our desire to always keep moving forward is actually having the opposite effect that we would expect. instead of accomplishing everything, we are actually overworking ourselves and essentially missing out on the small things in life. if we take technology, for example, it has taken hostage every waking free second of our lives, drawing our attention and consuming our time. when we consider this, it becomes clear that life could be improved with rest and reflection, so that we can slow life down and enjoy it fully. sitting stagnant is not bad, and practices like meditation, yoga, or just thinking would be majorly beneficial to ensuring we are truly operating under the healthiest and most productive standards. while making a genuine effort to slow things down is a great strategy to help us enjoy each moment of life, this does not mean we should sit idle and watch life pass us by. i believe we should cautiously live by the idea that fr. michael himes in which, “the only time your vocation is settled is when you are settled (six feet under that is!)” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). this method is a great strategy to live life by to ensure that you are getting the very most out of it. if we keep searching for joy, we’re bound to keep finding more of it, and therefore bound to live a good and successful life. of course, both of these strategies should be practiced in moderation. a good balance of actively chasing our goals while still including breaks in the monotony and opportunities to slow things down would be ideal. this is the perfect formula to allow ourselves to experience just the right amount of stimulation and relaxation, which would produce an ultimate level of happiness. another major factor of a life well lived is learning to consistently contemplate and reevaluate in a healthy manner. life is not the easiest thing to understand, by any means. it has ups, downs, expectations and surprises. in fact, a lot of the time what happens in our lives is out of our control. for example, dr. jihoon kim lost most movement in his body in a snowboarding https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 pepe 3 accident. however, he reflected by saying, “so as i began just thanking god and being more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). dr. kim is a prime example of how we can reflect upon our lives and learn to reevaluate the way we think. in these instances that are out of our control, it's important to focus on what we can control, which is our mind. there's so many ways to think about something, and practicing healthy and optimistic thoughts is essential to allowing yourself to believe your life can be good, and ultimately achieving it. another form of revaluation can emerge in the way we choose to judge others. in a 2020, notre dame graduate tia b. paulette formed a project which helped influence a case where, “elkhart county prosecutors dismissed a murder charge against andy royer, who spent 16 years in prison despite being innocent” (“domer dozen” by university of notre dame moreau fye week two). while many might view a man like andy royer as the enemy because of his “conviction”, paulette’s initiative offered him an opportunity, understanding, and help so that he could bridge a new connection and acceptance with the new world. thinking with these terms of acceptance and understanding are greatly important strategies to ensuring we are giving the world around us a fair chance. overall, when we take an approach of reevaluation and contemplation in life, we allow ourselves to be open to new possibilities, view points, and overall forms of happiness; a necessity for a good life. the final step to a life well lived involves connecting with others and forming strong relationships. the bottom line about life that we must understand, is that we are meant to live life alongside others. in a ted talk delivered by the pope, he explains that, “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript pepe 4 francis moreau fye week seven). this quote alludes to the notion that we cannot live life completely on our own; there is a higher significance to life than that, and this significance is brought to us through relationships with others. if we lived life without interacting with anyone, it would be boring and somewhat meaningless. the people we meet and what ensues from interacting with them is what makes life interesting, fresh, and purposeful. when i interviewed my girlfriend she concurred that, “i am a person who loves connecting with others, and sees it as a major role in my happiness” (“moreau discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week 5). similarly to others, i understand that through relationships, we are introduced to love, friendships, and belonging, which hold large significance in the happiness we feel day to day and in the long run. the meruelo family center for career development agrees with this claim in the way that, “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). in this light, the people around us are the greatest tool at our disposal. there are ample people around you that are willing and ready to make an impact on your life. relationships are meant to assist you in the process of finding the best future for yourself, and therefore, it is ignorant to think that you can or should do it without that help. talking to others and engaging in the process of learning from other experiences and opinions is the smartest decision you can make in order to make your life the best it can be. ultimately, relationships and connections with others are what makes the world variable and enables growth so that we can live our most successful and happy life. at the end of the day, living a life well lived is based on opinion. only you can decide if your life was worthwhile, and only you can make an effort to make it so. in my opinion, i would https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ubrm1yv79ntwrdgle481wx0mf8amgysmynev6ws-qii/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ pepe 5 believe i lived a life well-lived specifically if i balance ambition and relaxation, consistently contemplate and reevaluate in a healthy manner, and engage in connection with others and form relationships. these practices are essential standards to ensuring a life that brings about happiness, success, and overall satisfaction, and therefore would ultimately be proud points to appear in your eulogy. theo helm fys 10101-83 april 29, 2022 capstone integration four assignment making every “tuesday” in life meaningful a mission statement is a lifelong outlook on life for short term, day to day life, as well as to accomplish long term goals. my life has recently been driven by academic goals. however, once one goal is achieved, another goal quickly takes its place, sometimes undermining one achievement after another. the same goes for small scale goals like reaching the end of the week to have fun on the weekend. this is so common that there is a known chant of “tgif.” therefore, i think that the average days, in between those goals or the fun weekends, the average “tuesdays” should be emphasized in trying to find meaning in life. afterall, those average days make up most of our lives. i want to look back on my life and be proud of what i did each and every day, not only the days that i achieved something noteworthy. this is one of the main points i have concluded from the 13 weeks of class this semester. i want to live each day with purpose and in efforts to live a meaningful life. in one text from class entitled “navigating your career journey,” d.a. luzzo writes, “after you leave nd, some of the details (like choosing a major) will change, but the core elements remain the same: learn about yourself, explore careers, reflect, & take action” (“around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions” by d.a. luzzo and l.e. severy moreau fye week four). therefore, in order to accomplish my goal of living a meaningful life and effectively taking action to do so, i have created a mission statement for myself. although this task was daunting, text in my integration three assignment something that eased that anxiety which said, “simply thinking about what you should do to live a life well lived shows that you are already on the right path” (“integration three” by moreau fye week eight). utilizing other supplementary texts, out of class assignments, and in class discussions, i have formed my mission statement according to the values that have either remained steadfast or developed throughout the semester. my mission statement reflects my current values in life, after much deliberation on how i want to give my life meaning. however, my mission statement is in no way all inclusive, because it is an ever changing mission, as i continue to develop new experiences at notre dame and beyond. just as i have integrated sources from class into my mission statement, i will use my mission statement and integrate the messages in it with my past, current, and new experiences at notre dame, so that my statement will always reflect my core values. i will appreciate, express, and share my family, culture, and heritage. i have always known that one of the most prominent aspects of my life is my family, culture and heritage. however, for the first time i heard it qualified by my friend melody in an interview for the discernment conversation activity this semester. when asked what she thought i value and desire most in life, she responded, “friends, family, and people around you. you know yourself very well and are strong in your values” (“discernment conversation activity reflection” by moreau fye week five). through this activity, i learned the importance of practicing and understanding my relationships with aspects of life such as family and culture. if i know my core values and put them into practice daily, then i will be able to reflect on them to a greater extent. in my family, i will express my heritage and culture through practice, which will be shared with the members of my family for generations. i will be a trustworthy sister, daughter, family member, and friend. i will be a friend, neighbor, citizen, leader, and future healthcare worker. i believe that each day should be spent with meaning, rather than solely relying on major achievements to give life meaning. an example of this is to have a good social-work life balance. a text by ruth graham in “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” says something to this account. she wrote, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i tend to put too much pressure on myself and on long term goals i have, mostly academic related, to give life meaning. i also tend to only think of myself and how situations affect my life, rather than how my life can affect others in a positive way. i learned this in the video “5 minutes: a grotto short film,” when dr. jihoon kim says, “when the hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (“5 minutes” jihoon kim moreau fye week six). by using these sources, i now think that i should instead do things to make life, on any given day, meaningful. i will do so by integrating service in my life. i will effectively communicate ideas to those around me, with courage, strength, wisdom, and an open mind. outside of work, i will be an observant and considerate neighbor and individual who seeks to understand perspectives she does not personally relate to. i will make a meaningful contribution to the lives of others through acts of service in everyday life. i will succeed in a career that intertwines with direct service to others. in my community, i will act with responsibility for contributing to a more healthy and productive environment for those who are directly impacted by it as well as those who will experience the same environment in the future. i will foster deeper relationships with people based on genuine connections and trust, by growing my emotional maturity. throughout the course of the semester, i have discovered the importance of emotional maturity. especially being so far from home for longer than i have ever before, along with all of what comes with life in a completely new environment, my mental and emotional health was put to the ultimate challenge. prior to arriving at school, i practiced things like self reflection and other forms of mental health exercises in order to best prepare myself for these impending struggles. father hesburg once said, “well of course we can all do better if we worked harder but it’s like holding a man underwater and saying why don’t you swim” (“hesburgh: the documentary” by jerry barca moreau fye week two). in hearing this, i realized that i could never fully be prepared for the obstacles i would face. however, with consistent efforts, i had a better sense of myself, my values, and my overall mental and emotional well being. the video “why the only future worth building includes everyone” set a similar message when pope francis said, “power is like drinking gin on an empty stomach… you lose your balance and you will end up hurting yourself and those around you… through humility and concrete love, on the other hand, power… becomes a service, a force for good” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i came to understand that there are things that i cannot control. therefore, an open mindset and outlook on life allows me to both welcome personal growth and foster new and genuine relationships with others. people in one’s life are not only important to consider and serve, but vital to a meaningful life. steve reifenberg wrote that relationships with others and the simple act of service is meaningful and rewarding in a way that is intrinsic and unique to human interaction. he wrote in “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” saying, “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). his point is also similar to one i made in my allyship reflection assignment when i wrote, “i will make more of an effort to continue to be an ally by participating in activities such as those described above without the prompting of an assignment, but rather as a personal goal to understand and support others” (“allyship reflection” by moreau fye week twelve). therefore, i want to take care of my relationship with myself first, then share myself with others through service. in my interactions with others, i will be vulnerable and empathetic to foster meaningful relationships that are founded on respect and care. i will follow through with my mission with consistent and conscious efforts to see effective change. through past experiences and lessons learned both in and out of the classroom, i have discovered a lot about myself and how i want to represent myself in the world. however, a mission statement should be ever changing, as i continue to grow and learn more. all of the chaos of life makes it difficult to consistently be productive, especially with the restraint of time. as pico iyer wrote in a text, “in the age of movement and connection, space… has been annihilated by time” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). however, i think that if time is spent intentionally and with planned, consistent efforts, then i will see tangible results. another part of my mission is to constantly reflect on myself, my actions, and my values, because one person or idea can never be fully correct and right. i came to realize this in a class discussion in my university seminar class, when a student was able to completely change my mind on an idea. dr. robin diangelo wrote in “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” that, “our socialization renders us racially illiterate” (“why it's so hard to talk to white people'' by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). her point is similar to a comment made by eitan hersh in a podcast when he said, “you know, you've already read the newspaper. you've already listened to all the radio. what possibly more could you be getting from this?” (“passion isn't enough” by shankar vedantam moreau fye week eleven). i think that these sources emphasize the need to be conscious of how human and media interactions are influencing my values, and be conscious of the fruitfulness of what i take in everyday. i will be aware of my surroundings and always question what i am doing and putting into my mind and body. i will consciously put my beliefs into small practices in order to see tangible change. i will actively work towards my goals, finding ways to accomplish and integrate them with my aspirations in living a good life. i will live as both a dreamer and realist, as i value creative aspirations and realistic expectations. i will be an organized planner and critical thinker, with emphasis on effective and tangible results. overall, my mission is to advocate for others through learning, service, and communication, in order to serve those in my life, my community, and myself, in such a way that is lasting and significant (“mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). works cited by week “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one “hesburgh: the documentary” by jerry barca moreau fye week two “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three “around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions” by d.a. luzzo and l.e. severy moreau fye week four “discernment conversation activity reflection” by moreau fye week five “5 minutes” jihoon kim moreau fye week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven “integration three” by moreau fye week eight “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine “why it's so hard to talk to white people” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten “passion isn't enough” by shankar vedantam moreau fye week eleven “allyship reflection” by moreau fye week twelve “mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen works cited barca, j., et al. “hesburgh: the documentary: university of notre dame.” notre dame magazine, 10 apr. 2019, https://magazine.nd.edu/stories/hesburgh-the-documentary/. bordallo, colleen. allyship reflection. moreau fye, 2022, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1wynymz-vbi2uysm_nlpzieb6z7b2tdvm0dyab6 dab5s/edit?usp=sharing bordallo, colleen. discernment conversation activity reflection. moreau fye, 2022, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ghifib7x_vyeizaocqwuhtdvktokpq2aker2kaf cg5u/edit bordallo, colleen. integration three. moreau fye, 2022, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1opv32zztehzdw6xbbk5gnlvbonlaonienobdx xz24ee/edit?usp=sharing. bordallo, colleen. mission statement. moreau fye, 2022, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vk3rowaj8rd6fs54zh-jhiyetxhixfdyk9k30-m zqbg/edit?usp=sharing dr. robin diangelo, and the good men project. “why it's so hard to talk to white people about racism.” huffpost, huffpost, 6 dec. 2017, https://www.huffpost.com/entry/why-its-so-hard-to-talk-to-white-people-about-racism_b _7183710. francis, pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript. graham, ruth. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” the new york times, the new york times, 14 may 2021, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html. iyer, pico, and einarsd́óttir eydís. why we need to slow down our lives? ted books/simon & schuster, 2014. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ kim, jihoon. “5 minutes.” grotto network, 10 nov. 2021, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/. luzzo, d.a., & severy, l.e. (2009). around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions. in making career decisions that count: a practical guide (3rd ed.) (pp. 1-12). upper saddle river, nj: pearson education inc. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ reifenberg, prof. steve. teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together. the observer, 25 jan. 2021. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh -rs30/edit vedantam, shankar. “passion isn't enough.” hidden brain media, 10 feb. 2020, https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/. tommy hedman a man remembered by humility, service, and love: the eulogy of tom “tommy” hedman delivered by a childhood friend american author r.j. palacio once said, “the things we do are the most important things of all. they are more important than what we say or what we look like. the things we do outlast our mortality . . . that's why your deeds are like your monuments. built with memories instead of with stone.” although many people throughout their lives attempt to orient themselves and their actions towards making a difference in the lives of others, no one epitomized this more than tom “tommy” hedman. tommy dedicated his entire life to caring for those who could not care for themselves as a physician, but he also worked tirelessly to lessen the discrepancy of access to medical care in third-world countries across the world. despite these incredible accomplishments as a doctor, to all who knew him best, he was simply a loving, caring, and devoted son, brother, father, husband, and friend. he remained grounded in what was important until his last breath: his relationships and connections with others. pope francis once expressed that “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i am not sure anyone here can find someone who lived by this mantra more than tommy. he never let the fame, money, or success that came with his career get to his head, but rather, he used his line of work as a force for good in the lives of others. additionally, all his family members and friends can attest to how he never missed a birthday and always took the time to show immense gratitude for his relationships. however, i think i can speak a little bit more to his character and love, as i grew up a couple blocks away from the small white house that tommy grew up in saint paul, minnesota. fr. michael himes once remarked, “all of my other vocations, all of the many ways in which i live my life, must contribute to that one all embracing demand, that one constant vocation to be fully, totally, absolutely as human as i can possibly be” (“three key questions” by fr. michal himes moreau fye week 3). growing up right next to tommy in saint paul, there was not one second that went by when he was not completely immersed in the current moment. he was an innocent, carefree kid that strived to experience everything life could offer him. tommy used to organize night games such as “zombie tag” and “beckon” where he would ride his bike and knock on the door of every one of his grade school classmates in the neighborhood, no matter whether or not they were the closest of friends. much like fr. ted hesburgh did when his students knocked on his office window at 2 or 3 o’clock in the morning, tommy welcomed everyone with open arms and preached the importance of inclusivity through his actions (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). those late night games with all of the neighborhood kids are some of my fondest memories with tommy because it reminded me how, despite all of the accolades he received in his medical career, he still was that same kid that i grew up alongside. he never let the success change him, and he always made sure to hold onto his strong relationships he forged growing up. speaking of his career, i remember talking to tommy extensively when he was just starting college at notre dame. he was all stressed out about choosing his major and discerning what life path he was called to pursue. i tried to tell him, as did the career center on campus at nd, to “relax and put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major. it’s much more complex than that...but also much more exciting” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). however, none of these words seemed to get through to him. that was when i decided to facetime him and talk things out man to man. i told him that he was far from the only one going through this discernment process and that students all around the world were feeling the exact same way. also, i tried to remind him to take a step back and think about his decision from a larger perspective. as pico iyer once said in a ted article, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). after saying this to him, i hung up, set my phone down, and didn’t think too much about our conversation. it was only after i talked to him again when he was in medical school at the university of minnesota that i realized the impact these little words had on him. tommy said he was so thankful to have friends like me who would always have his back no matter what, and he said that conversation was what he needed to think more clearly and intentionally about his career decision. through this interaction, i came to understand how much of an impact our words and actions have on others, even if they do not seem very important at the moment. i am so glad i had that type of effect on tommy, as he has certainly been there for me throughout my life as well. i’d like to close this eulogy to encourage you all, tommy’s family, friends, and loved ones, to think closely about the man he was and the way he lived his life. tommy serves as an example to all on how to be not just successful, but more important, how to be a man of humility, service, and love. he was a friend like no other, and he will be surely missed. with his passing, i think it is important for all of us to live more intentionally, remain grounded in the moment, and carry on tommy’s values through the rest of our lives. no one knows how much time they have been given, so we must make the most of every opportunity we have to better the lives of others around us like tommy showed us. as dr. jihoon kim reminds us, we must “focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week 6). every second is precious. every second is an opportunity. every second is a gift from god. as his father told tommy and now as i tell you all, “god has blessed you with a special gift. it is up to you to figure out what it means and how to use it in the service of others” (“week five discernment conversation activity” by tommy hedman moreau fye week 5). may tommy’s legacy endure forever, and may god bless you all. moreau first year experience miss taylor 3/3/22 a calling to serve the vulnerable on behalf of the redmond family, i would like to thank everyone for gathering here today for the celebration of life for . liam greatly touched all our lives in many ways. a husband, brother, father, and grandfather, he was a man of many titles. however there was no more important title to liam than friend. as i am sure many of you can attest, liam was always there with a smiling face and endless conversation. always looking to make friends with whoever would give him the time and attention even if it was a brief interaction. he had the ability and charisma to make friends with so many people which is why we are all gathered here today. born in west chester, new york in 2002, was not bound for city life after moving to vermont shortly into his life. liam was extremely proud to be a vermonter, known for exploring the green mountains in the summertime and skiing in the winter up until the age of 90. there was only one way to get liam to move out of vermont and that reason was the university of notre dame. since he was a young boy liam was one of the most dedicated irish fans i had ever met and there was nothing more he wanted then to attend notre dame. as his lifelong friend aidan recalled, liam had one of the best work ethics i had ever seen, he was especially passionate about every project he was involved with and always contributed 110%. (“moreau conversation” by moreau fye week five) with his exceptional work ethic established early on liam was able to attend his dream school. i know for a fact he is smiling down on us wearing that infamous nd sweatshirt. little did he know that those four years in south bend were to be some of the most important and influential years of his life. notre dame helped to shape the core values that liam embodied his entire life. one of the values that liam developed through his catholic education was his love for his god and his perspective of what was truly important in life. he realized early on that in good times and in bad one must rely on the goodness of god for strength. i remember one of his friends asking a question along the lines of “if god is good, why does he allow suffering in my life?” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six) i recall him replying how at times it can feel as if god has abandoned us, but it is so important to realize that god always has a plan and is supporting us by helping us to grow and learn from suffering. after hearing liam speak so passionately about his love and loyalty to his god i quickly realized his depth and groundedness. notre dame can not only be attributed for developing liam’s faith but also his extraordinarily successful professional career. as many of us are familiar with, nd was the birthplace of liam’s first widely regarded and established entrepreneurial venture, desi. early on into his time at college liam developed the idea for his revolutionary rideshare app. through numerous obstacles, liam was able to set a goal of creating his own app and actually produce it. who would have guessed that his first idea developed on the desk of his tiny dorm room would grow into the multi billion dollar company it is today? i would have and i did, liam was one of the most dedicated and passionate individuals i had ever met. one quote from iconic notre dame president fr. hesburgh that i believe emulates liam’s drive is this, “whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living.” (“hesburgh” by fr. theodore hesburgh moreau fye week two) desi was only the beginning, liam was always setting additional goals and looking into new ideas for how he could impact and improve society. from desi he went on to form a variety of different companies and products. with every company, they always reflected his deep passion for inflecting positive social change on society and reducing global climate emissions. he truly was a natural entrepreneur his entire life. although liam was exceptionally proud of all his successful business ventures and accomplishments, that wasn’t what was truly important to him. most of all he desired to serve those who lived on the margins of society. he often preached this well known quote from admiral richard e. byrd, “‘half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) liam believed that we are all equals no matter our backgrounds or financial status. he never let his financial success alter his values as he regularly donated his earnings to a variety of organizations that support those who lack financial security and are living on the margins. he would often strike up a conversation and support strangers forgotten by society on the street. liam’s passion for serving others is ultimately what led him to leave behind his business ventures. he decided to focus solely on the nonprofit he founded to serve at-risk teens struggling with mental health. i believe this quote accurately reflects liam’s motivations for moving on from his financial success to his life’s mission, “this joy may lead you in many, many directions, and it may lead you to further questions.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) he found joy in helping others and followed that calling by dedicating his work and life to serving those who were most in need. when he reflected on his feeling that his calling was elsewhere, liam often referred to this belief, “this reinforces the need to consider all four aspects values, interests, personality, and skills when making a career decision.” (“navigating your career journey” by nd center for career development moreau fye week four) this is what defined liam for truly living a life well-lived, he gave up his career which had been his whole life and asked the difficult question about what was important to him. he demonstrated his courage and authenticity by following that calling from god to serve the vulnerable. even though his calling was to serve others, there was nothing more important to liam than his family and his community. his humor led him to become a beloved member and leader of every community in which he called home throughout his life. liam believed that without community, humans naturally aren’t able to form their values to their full potential.this quote from an excerpt of tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle accurately articulates how liam valued the importance of community, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together, they had a potful of plenty.” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven) even with his dedication to his career, values, and community, liam always loved his wife and kids the most, he always made time for his family. many of his employees remember liam shutting down the entire workplace so he and all the employees made sure to spend more time with their loved ones. i would conclude that liam will be missed, but his legacy and essence will forever remain with us. i encourage you all to live like liam did and to always embody his values. w professor chan moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 moreau capstone integration my mission statement is: as a man who has many interests, passions, talents and opportunities, i resolve to make the best use of every opportunity that i am faced with. by putting in my best effort into all my endeavors, i seek to elevate myself and others to the best possible people that we can be. i will do this by growing in wisdom by educating myself in order to grow in awareness about problems that face others as well as learning how to improve myself to be better able to combat these issues. i must be courageous in order to reach out to others and improve their lives. by doing this, i will be able to respond to suffering in the world in a meaningful way that benefits the most people. in order to live a life well lived, i believe that it is both my responsibility, as well as necessary for me to embrace humanity and do the most good i can with my time on this earth, including social justice, career accomplishments, and raising a family. therefore, i must dedicate myself to becoming as best suited for this as i can be. by doing this, i will honor myself, my family and community, as well as god. in the first section of this course, we learned that “the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” — (meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week four). however, as i have examined further my feelings about what it means to truly make a difference in the world i have come to disagree with this statement. i personally do not think that any career, working a nine to five job would be the best choice for me. i believe that the way to get the most out of my life is to serve others with my work as best i can. i believe that i must live out this mission statement both in my actions as well as how i plan my life. the first step for this is recognizing the problems that exist in the world. according to dean marcus cole, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean marcus cole. moreau fye week 12). therefore, i must be aware of the issues that others face in the world as well as how i can best solve these issues. through both self reflection as well as my experiences at notre dame, i have discovered that money, as well as simply working a normal job is not necessarily what i feel called to do. i feel that it is necessary to use my knowledge, like from my studies as well as my life experience, and my opportunities, such as those provided to me by the university of notre dame, in order to create the most positive difference in the world as possible. some specific examples of actions i can take here at notre dame are becoming more involved with service as well as attending meetings for the engineers without borders club. by doing that, i can put my actual talents to use and set up my future to truly make a difference in the world where it counts. i can start this process by mankind conscious decisions to research the problems that plague america as well as the world in general. i can do this by seeking out people with different backgrounds and learning about the problems that face those different societies. by finding out that “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense about how someone might reasonably disagree.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blascho. moreau fye week 11), i have further learned the vitality of learning more and forming more meaningful relationships with others. this importance of relationships with others is one of the most important takeaways i had from this first half of the semester. it taught me that what truly matters in life, and what i would truly want to be remembered for is my impact on others and on the world around me. as pope francis said, “life flows through our relationship with others” (“why the only future worth building includes others” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). therefore, i feel called to use my time at notre dame to grow close to my good friends and to experience the fullness of the student life and opportunities that are available to me. these friends have shown me the importance of relationships in my life, not just to help others, but to help myself as well. i fully agree with the statement that “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve rifenburg. fye week 9). they have made me a better person and helped me to find what i want out of my life. moving forward, i can join clubs that interest me and hang out more with people from those people i meet with varying backgrounds. furthermore, by experiencing this fullness of the human condition, i hope to grow closer to myself, and by extension god. as i have learned, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). this mission will be difficult to live as it will require me to devote more time and effort into others and less of my time can be spent on things i enjoy. i’m sure that there will be times when i falter and fail to give my all for others. however, by surrounding myself with a strong support network and a good background in education through notre dame, i believe that i will be able to handle whatever challenges come my way. steven wu moreau first year experience professor lassen april 28, 2022 je me souviens – a story and a future mission statements have a twofold nature. on one hand, they are supposed to guide us towards a better version of ourselves, or the “ought” inherent in us. on the other hand, they necessarily reflect some aspects of our lived experiences and the way they have already shaped us. the university’s mission statement explains that her christian identity demands from her members “a willingness to enter into the conversation that gives it life and character” (“university of notre dame mission statement” – moreau fye week thirteen). mine is no different. the past two years have been times of change and turbulence in my life, and i have made decisions that i still don’t know whether i will regret in five years’ time. these decisions manifest some of the objectives that i want to accomplish in life, but they themselves will also delineate the scope of my future endeavors. to remain faithful, and to encounter the world “as a catholic christian and an aspiring peacemaker, i strive to understand the world as it appears to individuals with varying perspectives and upbringings,” so begins the most recent rendition of my mission statement. notre dame, a place that i have loved and still love, has had a major influence on the development of my faith. 1453 days before i started this assignment, i was received into the catholic church at st. brigid’s church in peapack, new jersey. two months later, i was sitting in fisher hall, marveling at the beautiful scenery around me and the atmosphere of a secluded yet tight-knit campus. my experience at summer scholars further confirmed that an authentic catholic community is what i long for, and thus began my long journey towards this goal. i have long imagined, and people around me likewise, that i would become a professor, either in theology or some related subject. i planned out the basic roadmap of my career: coming to notre dame, going to graduate school, and applying for a position. but for a few hiccups on the way, that path began quite well, as i was eventually admitted to my dream school and ready to start. apparently, god had other plans for me, and i was forced to take a gap year during covid. indeed, “planning [a] career is much like planning for a trip… it’s not a one-step process” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center – moreau fye week four). i had a lot to learn and to challenge myself than accept a straight path as the one i should take. that year became an inflection point in my dreams. during my gap year, i discovered that my multicultural and international experience gave me a restless character. i was constantly looking for new connections and encounters. that was what i experienced as i traveled around china, exploring the profound religious history across the country. through networking and “explor[ing] … ways of living” (“irish compass activity” – moreau fye week five), i was told that i had a particular charism not necessarily in teaching, but in making connections and helping to craft solutions. i realized that my aspiration was not solely to remain in a community but to take what i received there and spread it out into the world, all the while remaining loyal to my identity as a catholic. that, coupled with my other academic interests, led me to a new path of integrating the political science and theological facets of global issues. i hope that i can contribute to building a community where “all of the burning issues that affect the church and the world today are plumbed to their depths in an atmosphere of faith” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). to become a bridge stepped on by others having lived in a variety of cultures and personally experienced clashes of ideologies and religious beliefs in my home, i understand that dialogue is a necessary first step to conversation. “let[ting] go of our… certitude” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo – moreau fye week ten), racial or otherwise, is an inherently discomforting experience for many and all too many good occasions slip away between our fingers because of that discomfort. that is why i strive to start those difficult conversations and, as referenced by the newly ordained bishop of hong kong, “a bridge cannot be except when it has been stepped on by others.” i see my unique story as both a privilege and a call to action, for our “bubble[s]” can often quietly turn into “echo chamber[s]” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). there needs be that “outsider” willing to challenge presumptions and show people that there are alternatives to stereotypes and biases. “the future of humankind isn’t exclusively in the hands of politicians, of great leaders… but… most of all, in the hands of those people who will recognize the other as a ‘you’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). this also means that sometimes we will need to let those whom we “come to serve…take care of us” and not fear that “flipped equation” (“teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). for example, my roommate has taught me valuable lessons above myself that i would not have otherwise learned, even though we were on the verge of fighting during the last semester. this tiny bit of “peacemaking” has brought lasting memories to both of us. in truth, i do not see myself as a peacemaker in the sense that i will go places and solve people’s problems. instead, a bridge is stepped on by others and allows the two sides to come to a much agreement. no matter how deep the hatred is in many places, including lebanon where i will spend a month this summer, “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation” (“i am george floyd” by marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). to overcome the obsession and anxiety over my identity, and to bring that confidence to others the last part of my mission statement is, in fact, an ongoing struggle. you may be surprised to learn that i have put about 6000 miles on my new car during the semester as i was forced to commute from canada every weekend (and i still survived).1 “where is home for you?,” asks the customs officer at the detroit-windsor tunnel every time i pass. it is a harmless 1 that is to accrue additional days so i would not be forced to remain in canada for two straight years after i leave. every time i pass by the oratory in montreal and see the holy cross-run secondary school, my mind is brought to the fact that fr. sorin chose to found the university in indiana out of all places. and straightforward question for most people, whereas it has been heart-wrenching for me. i have not found a welcoming home, in a holistic sense, in any country that i have lived in, including my native china. unlike my parents, i had neither a strong attachment to my city nor the ability, considering my interests, to remain there for life. immigration concerns have forced me to, above all else, leave notre dame, my home now and forever, and settle down in yet another country. as a polyglot, i have learned to understand multiple languages at just about the same rate i lose active vocabulary in each and every one of them. i have noticed that i have to search for words and stumble when speaking chinese a lot more than i used to, without acquiring a higher fluency in english. to many people, having that skill is something positive to put on a résumé. for me, it has been a great source of anxiety that i would never belong anywhere. as eurich correctly points out, self-reflection could also cause someone to be more “stressed, depressed, or anxious” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). sometimes hours of reflecting reveal that i need to constantly hide behind the curtain and dodge that question of where home is, and make up a different identity in every place that i may live in the days to come. they plunge me into a darker downward spiral. however, there is hope amidst darkness that should propel us into action. none of us belong perfectly to any place. st. thérèse of lisieux famously said that “the world is thy ship and not thy home.” this past year, my pastor who confirmed me into the church was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, and unless the lord intervenes he might not be long for this world. but i see him there at church, preaching passionately on live-streamed mass every single weekend. that is not something i can yet see myself accomplishing right now. but i look up to him and pray for strength to see the worth of my mission regardless of circumstances. during this past holy week, i spent time “unclogging [my] mind” through meditation (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). yes, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“meet the nun” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). as i continue to tread on this path of life, i would like my life to be remembered not in terms of the amount of graces i might have received, but by the way i responded to those that i did receive. i shared this with my friend in lewis hall who is a catechumen but has to delay baptism due to academic reasons, and to my surprise, my short reflection brought some needed comfort to her. this is my mission statement, and, god willing, my eulogy (“write your own eulogy” – moreau fye week eight). moreau final integration moreau fye integration 11 march 2022 my goal: live a lively, loving, and laughable life after spending time reflecting and thinking about the beginning of my college journey, i never realized how important my moreau class was for my self-discovery. each week, moreau enabled me to take a step back from my life and truly think about my future in a different and more thoughtful way. even though it wasn’t always easy to reflect and reconsider, as sister aletheia said, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic…but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham-moreau fye week 3). as i continued to do the readings and assignments each week, every one of them had an impact on me, allowing me to have a more clear picture of who i want to be in the future as well as who i am currently. while i am definitely still figuring my life out, with the help of moreau, i have a better understanding of myself, others, as well as the person that i want to try and become as i continue to grow and learn more about myself. for my last integration assignment, i would love to share my personal mission statement, as well as how i think it is going to help me pursue the best life possible. pico iyer quotes, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week 1). especially during a time where the world is moving so quickly, it is crucial that we take the time to step back and truly see the importance of our lives. by doing this, each individual will have a more clear perspective about how to progress forward in the most effective, loving, and thoughtful way possible. my current mission statement is as follows: as a nineteen-year-old girl trying to thrive and survive in a difficult world, i have learned the importance of one incredibly influential thing: kindness. kindness is a whisper that shouts, especially in the world that we live in today. i believe it is a duty that must be implemented into everyday life in order to grow in love for oneself and for others. growing up, my mom always reminded me that “people will not remember what you say, but they will remember how you made them feel.” with this in mind, it is my goal to live my life trying to spread kindness as often as i can to the people around me. i am going to strive to constantly wear kindness in the corners of my smile, working to create a better world by being a good steward of the gifts that god gave to me. along with kindness, inclusivity remains one of my most pertinent and essential goals. no matter who you are, what you believe in, or what you set out to do, everyone should have someone in their corner, working to build them up instead of tearing them down. we are all people with one thing in common: each other. if i can do my job right, i will leave the world more unified than divided. believe, dream, and achieve. we all can do something. it does not take a lot to have the courage to make a difference for the better in the world. no matter how small it may be, it is still acting with courage which, in the end, will make a lasting difference. i should not be quiet in a world where silence is a killer, but rather use my voice to advocate and make change. having the courage to unite others, be kind, inclusive, and advocate for oneself and others is what i believe will ultimately change the world. (writing a personal mission statement-moreau fye week 13) reflecting on this statement, i have realized that there is a lot more to my mission in life than these 318 words. while i do believe everything that i have written above, i also believe that i need to be a better advocate on behalf of my words, instead of remaining silent in a world that is yearning for change. after reading dean g. marcus cole’s story, i realized the importance of using my voice instead of remaining silent in our world. he specifically quotes, “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” (dean g. marcus cole text-moreau fye week 12). his words inspired me to begin to advocate for change in the world, by expanding my mindset and working to get to know others who are different than i am. “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree which is accelerating political polarization” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko-moreau fye week 11). while it is important to have friends with the same motivations, morals, and goals as you, it is also important to expand from these people, creating and establishing friendships with those who open you up to worldly possibilities. it is through these friendships that new possibilities will arise, instead of being shut down by only behaving a certain way. an echo chamber was defined as “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited and can lock us into certain world views.” just as the video explained, locking myself into this bubble is often more harmful than helpful to me. moving forward, i am going to try and focus on stepping outside of my comfort zone in order to expand my friendships, be vulnerable, and gain a greater world perspective by being open to new ideas and perspectives. furthermore, i would like to do a better job of integrating my relationship with god into my personal mission statement in life. oftentimes, i lose sight of the comfort of god, abandoning the relationship that we have together when it should be at the forefront of my mind. i often ask myself the question, “if god is good, why does he allow suffering in my life?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr-moreau fye week 6). the reading in week 10 helped me look at this question in a different way, leaving my blame for god behind me. while “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh-moreau fye week 10). in order to pursue a life well-lived, i am going to try and have more confidence in myself, trusting that god loves me for me, instead of trying to change myself to be someone who i think god wants me to be. i need to look at our relationship as a judgment free zone where i have room to both grow and develop. i should not lead my life with the intentions of “god wants me to do this so that is why i should,” but rather work to do things because it is the kind and right thing to do. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg-moreau fye week 9). this dynamic was evident in professor steve’s story as the children cared for him because they knew that it was the right thing to do, not for personal gain. with this in mind, the journey of father hesburgh rings true in my mind. he specifically said, “my basic principle is that you don’t make decisions because they are cheap; you make them because they’re right” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week 2). after watching the movie, hesburgh, i was able to see the importance of making decisions for the right reasons, even when it may not always be the easiest. finally, i would like to discuss my mission statement in regards to pursuing my passions and executing them in the best way possible in order to make the most out of my life. i am not going to lie, this year i have struggled trying to find my way. i have been unsure about the direction that i want to go, and worried that i am not doing what i am supposed to be doing. luckily, through moreau, i was able to have a conversation with my mom which brought clarity and hope about my future. my mom knows me better than anyone, so talking with her about my goals and dreams enabled me to have both hope and courage that i am going in the right direction. she said that she would always be there to support me no matter what happens because she loves me more than anything (discernment conversion activity-moreau fye week 5). after hearing my mom say these tangible words, i took comfort in the fact that she has faith and trust in how i am living my life. with this in mind, i realized that the relationships that i have cultivated and created are very important to me in life. i derive a lot of meaning and energy from the people that i surround myself with, so i am incredibly grateful for all of the wonderful people in my life. pope francis said, “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others… each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis-moreau fye week 7). the relationships that i have built and continue to build with others are what keep me going and enable me to be the best version of myself. overall, i realized the importance of giving myself a break. i am still young, so i should not be angry at myself for not knowing what i want to do in life. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip…it’s not a one step process” (“navigating your career journey”-moreau fye week 4). there are many steps that i need to take, mistakes i need to make, and life lessons i need to learn before i know exactly who i want to be and what i want to do. microsoft word capstone iii integration final how i have grown in my first year under the dome within the last year of my life, i have grown immeasurably. i feel much more independent, confident in my abilities, and hopeful about what my future contains. in addition, i have learned invaluable lessons about the realities of life and success. i am much more aware of the fact that every individual has personal issues that they struggle with, and that i have some of my own that i need to explore, as well. i have understood that success and happiness are unattainable without a reliable, trustworthy support system, and would thus like to begin the introduction of my refined personal statement by quoting from my favorite excerpt in the entirety of this course. “close both eyes; see with the other one… we are no longer saddled by the burden of our… constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week eight). as i was reviewing my mission statement before beginning this assignment, i discovered that i had forgotten a cornerstone of my character, and my true goals and dreams in this life: compassion. although i may not have as strong of an influence on other’s lives as father gregory boyle—whose life’s work has been to reduce the violent hatred between different gang members in the gang capital of the united states (los angeles)—i hope to at least have the opportunity to encourage others in pursuing their dreams, hopes, and efforts to live out their own personal mission statements. and so, my refined and reflected-on personal mission statement (with edits in bold): i understand that, as a human being, i will make mistakes, i will fail, and i will sometimes take one step forward, just to take two back. i also understand that, as a human being, i will make progress, i will grow, and i will constantly be discovering something new about myself, about others, about the world! thus, in my personal mission statement, i do not want to make ultimate decisions for myself. i do not know who i will be in 20 years. i know nothing about myself, except for who i am in the present moment. therefore, the most accurate, most realistic, and least jaded personal mission statement i can make is to strive to improve—not fix—one blemish i find in my character each day. if i can analyze my weaknesses, i will discover my strengths. if i can apply my strengths, i can improve my weaknesses. thus, i strengthen myself in the most well-rounded way possible. i utilize my fortitudes to stabilize my flaws. every day, i will strive to extend one limitation. i will push myself to my limits, to stretch them even further. i will also continue to apply my strengths, while making an effort to ameliorate my flaws. i know that one of my fiercest, most powerful strengths is my capability to be an understanding, compassionate, and empathetic individual. while i pursue this goal, i will also forgive myself for my failures and be compassionate towards myself on days when i struggle to be the best possible version of myself. thus, i will live to learn, grow, and develop while continuing to be a compassionate, capable human being. and while i pursue my own personal mission, i will support and encourage others who strive to do the same, knowing that i need this support system, too. by following this mission, i can trust one fact: i may not know who i will be tomorrow, or in a week, or in a year. but i know who i will strive to be today. (my mission statement – moreau fye week 13). throughout this year, and especially throughout this semester, i have learned that no individual is capable of succeeding by themselves. everybody requires a support system, and without it, he or she cannot flourish in their journey to achieve their fullest potential. during a conversation with my mother, she explained to me, “you need to learn to accept help from other people, because we all rely on each other for help. the ability to accept help is not a manifestation of weakness, but a manifestation of strength” (quote by mom – moreau fye week five). thus, another edit i made to my personal mission statement is to acknowledge the fact that i need my own team of people who will encourage me, guide me, and love me as i pursue my goals. throughout this year, i have found incredible individuals that i am lucky to call my friends and have had the honor of supporting them through difficult decisions such as the discernment of a major. i have been encouraged by them as well; they cheered for me while i competed at ncaa championships, they comforted me when i struggled with my adhd diagnosis, and they encouraged me when i picked myself up after a failure in order to try again. “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). i was able to accompany my friends on their journey of progress, and because i stayed with them, they stayed with me, too. i now understand that my openness to accepting help allows me to gain the support system i need, and also allows others to share their own experiences more comfortably which gives me the knowledge about them that i need in order to successfully support them: a cycle of reciprocity. i know that, throughout these next three years of my college career, and for the rest of my life, i will treasure these friends and the support system with which they have blessed me. another extremely important piece of knowledge—scientific fact, actually—that i have gained this year is the power of resting and recharging. if i want to push myself to the limits, i need to maintain an awareness that i do have boundaries. some activities for rest and relaxation that i have tried have been from moreau, in fact! one of my favorites has been meditation, which is ironic because i am an extremely fidgety person who has difficulty slowing down her thoughts for more than about 30 seconds. however, as i read in an article from one of our classes in moreau, this is the rule i need to remember: “don’t try to force meditation, and don’t make it complicated. simplify it” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). willingly sitting still and pondering over difficult decisions or just daydreaming on a consistent basis seemed torturous, at first, but i now realize the impact that just five minutes of silent thinking can make. it has allowed me to find clarity in my thinking and helps me better conceptualize and visualize the reasons behind any issues or worries i might be having. especially as someone who gets anxious quite easily and bombarded with a deluge of random thoughts, this method of relaxation has proved to be the most helpful and is something i will definitely continue to make time for throughout the rest of my schooling and even my work career. however, i have yet to learn how to truly allow myself to take breaks without feeling antsy, because i know i could be doing something productive. therefore, this will be a project that i will continue to work on for the next three years in university. i have also learned, through experience, that “it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by ccd – moreau fye week four). in the beginning of the year, i would constantly berate myself for repeatedly making the same mistakes. i did not realize that shame and anger towards myself would not encourage me to improve myself in the future. now, i have learned that i must treat myself as i would my best friend; i am the person with whom i will be living for the rest of my life, so i might as well treat myself with some kindness and respect! when i have a day where i fail at staying committed to my personal mission statement, i will analyze the mistakes i made, make note of them, and then forgive myself for them. as the neurosurgeon dillan ellegala once said when discussing how he would cope with making costly mistakes during surgery, “forgive and remember.” one of the must difficult, yet most helpful ways for me to learn to forgive myself for the repeated mistakes i would make and the ensuing failures was to understand that, in god’s eyes, i am right where i need to be. this idea also helped me become more patient and forgiving of other people’s errors that affected me. father boyle, in fact, expands on this topic of heavenly love in his book tattoos on the heart. reading his book for my literature usem this year taught me quite a bit about faith and trust. father boyle’s words taught me that god does not make mistakes in his creations, and that he loves each of his sons and daughters—whatever the current state of their character. knowing this very promising fact helps me be more understanding of myself. as the self-described college-educated gay catholic jacob walsh recalls when he discusses a conversation he had with a priest about his spiritual confusion, “the words of the priest from college came back to mind: ‘you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week ten). continuing to look for signs of god’s love for his children will make it much easier for me to act as a kinder and more considerate individual, both with myself and with other people, as i know that i will discover those signs everywhere, as soon as i truly look. while i do believe kindness to be one of my strongest suits, i do acknowledge that i should be more forgiving and loving toward myself, too. this realization brings me to my next point, which is that—when i fail to achieve a hope or dream—i tend to hyperfocus on the mistake, rather than the journey that led me to it. i tend to forget that mistakes are opportunities for growth, not signs of stagnancy or regress. comparing it to the universally-known metaphor of noticing only the trees, rather than the forest, my mistakes are the trees, while my progress is the forest. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). once i started working with an adhd life coach and a sports psychologist, i was able to better acknowledge the progress i had made, rather than fixate on my errors and failures. instead of being upset that i lost a bout, i acknowledge that i placed higher in the tournament than i did the year before at that same event. in the future, when i make a mistake, i will take a moment to think about what went wrong and realize that just because the situation did not turn out ideally, does not mean that i did not do my best and did not do better than i previously would have in the same situation. in the same way that i want to become more intentional about how i talk to myself, i would like to become more intentional about the way that i listen to my friends and the information i absorb. while paul blaschko discusses the intentional gain of information with a more political slant, i would argue that you could extend his statement to also include friends’ experiences, not just current events. blaschko states that “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko– moreau fye week eleven). while he is more discussing echo chambers and social bubbles, i applied his quote to my more personal life; when i surround myself with people whom i find complement my personality or inspire me to grow and develop into a more educated and compassionate person, i feel that i am absorbing positive information from them: proper values, differing yet valid opinions, etc. when i am spending time with people who seem condescending or have a more arrogant attitude, i feel that i am absorbing negative information that comes from people who seem to have the constant slant of self-gain. therefore, i would like to continue to surround myself with people whom i can come to for some advice, an opinion, or some general support; the information—whether tips or encouragement—is something positive for me to absorb that will help me see any difficult situation in which i might be with a more positive or well-rounded perspective. in addition, i feel that the friends and other individuals in my support system are people that i can trust: a foundation that is necessary for any type of growth. father hesburgh, in order to allow for the progression of the civil rights of african americans, had to create trust between extremely argumentative and disagreeable politicians who had polar opposite views on the subject. however, “once they trusted each other, they were able to do tremendous work” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). similarly, since i can trust the individuals in my support system, i know that—through the quid pro quo of friendship and encouragement—we can help each other flourish. most importantly, the idea of love and support for both myself and the people i surround myself with that i discuss in my mission statement highlights the importance of having and maintaining the values that allow for such positive and beneficial relationships. without establishing and committing to such values, we are not truly being the best versions of ourselves. as father moreau states, “our mutual respect and shared undertaking should be a hopeful sign of the kingdom, and they are when others can behold how we love one another” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). if i do not continue to refine, develop, and stay true to my values, i know that i will lose the love that i currently am blessed to hold from my friends. i know that, in order to push myself to embody my mission statement every day, i must make a commitment to myself to hold true to the principles of hard work, discipline, love, and empathy that i discuss in the statement. otherwise, i am not living in the light of the lord. finally, i understand that my mission to become the best possible version of myself will be fluid and will have to be modified as my life develops. i know that i may want to expand on the statement, and perhaps add an addendum, or more details! “there is no point where [i] can say, ‘the issue of my calling is settled’” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three), and that excites me more than anything else. as i said in my eulogy to my past self, i now understand what it feels like to be welcomed home to notre dame. i am truly grateful, that of all places i can begin to pursue my personal mission statement, it is here under the shining light of the golden dome. w professor chan moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the beauty of fading away we gather here today, not to mourn, but to celebrate the life of a great man: w, engineer, runner, writer, father to four, and grandfather to many. i implore you, not to mourn, but to live as toby did: living life to the fullest and attacking every goal in life with every fiber of your being. toby gave his all in every endeavor in life, in his family life, career, and personal life. toby cherished his relationships with his wife and children more than anything in the world. toby lived by the mantra that pope francis once said: “life flows through our relationship with others” – (“why the only future worth building includes others” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). he was inspired by his own parents to be the best version of himself, especially around his children and grandchildren and always encouraged them to achieve all they could in life and be the best version of themselves. toby’s relationship with my parents also has influenced his life greatly. they have shaped who he was as a person and made him the great man that he was. his dad encouraged to pursue engineering and to always be curious about the world and to always work hard. with that inspiration, he was able to achieve great things in the professional world. his mother inspired him to be creative and helped him develop his writing skills which he used to grow his dungeons and dragons podcast. without them, he would undoubtedly not have reached the heights that he did. he made sure to always live up to their example and inspire his kids to reach the same heights and to treat their own children the same way. toby pursued his relationships with his family in particular because those were the strongest and most important relationships in his life. however, he also used his relationships with his friends, both in high school and college, to grow as a person. he challenged everyone he knew to achieve as much as he did. toby also accomplished many things in his career, making major strides in the development of renewable energy options in his time as chief design engineer for rolls royce. he left the world in a better place for his grandchildren and encouraged them to carry on his legacy. however, rather than being motivated by accomplishment, toby was motivated by his personal values. he fully believed that “the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” — (meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week four). he inspired others to have the same mentality as himself and always told his children to think first and foremost about what they like to do and then think about what things they are good at. without his passion for his job and his many other interests, he would likely have neer achieved so much and been as self fulfilled as he was. he inspired each of his children to follow their dreams and supported them no matter what, believing in each of them to get themselves to where they truly desired to go. he saw the best in all of us and made it his mission to enable us to be the best versions of ourselves. however, toby was never one to think about his true accomplishments as being those inside the workplace. as father hesburg said, “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human success” – (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week two). although toby loved his work, he hated how it took time away from the things that truly mattered in life. he realized that a change must be made and that he should never “fixate on (his) problems instead of moving forward” – (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). because of this, after finishing his reduced emissions engine, he quit his job at rolls royce in order to spend more time with his family. he transitioned to working from home and pursued his dreams of being a dungeon master on a dungeons and dragons podcast. while his works at rolls royce undoubtedly made the world a better place, leaving it a much better position to deal with the harshness of climate change, his work as a dungeon master provided creativity and happiness for all of his listeners. he helped to bring forth a resurgence of dungeons and dragons and taught many young people how to open up and discover who they really are through the game. when i talked to toby about it just before his death, he told me that he valued his work as a dungeon master much greater than his work as an engineer. he showed me that “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one), and told me it was up to our generation to make the best possible use of his work. in contrast, while toby did not live to see the true lasting effects of his invention on the world, he was able to see all the lives he changed with his podcast. toby’s death did not catch him by surprise. he accepted that death was a natural part of life and lived his life to the fullest with his time on this earth. to quote ruth graham, “to us, death is exotic.” – (“joanna ebenstein” by ruth graham – moreau fye). however, to toby it was just another reason to do more every new day. he kept his death in mind and used every moment as an opportunity to make his life meaningful, through his work and service to others. he constantly pushed himself to not just do more for others, but to do better by others. to quote one of toby’s favorite artists, kurt cobain, “it’s better to burn out than to fade away.” however, toby proves the opposite: it is beautiful to fade away. i cherish my time with him in his final moments, all the memories we’ve shared of him across the years, and everything he has done for us. i hope that everyone here lives as fully as toby once did, giving your all in everything you do, and living for others. toby has shown us that you need to cherish your relationships – because that is what truly matters in life – and to never give up on your dreams. eulogy integration moreau due 3/4/22 morbidity in moreau: a memoir of me dear friends and family, welcome to my funeral, at which i am somehow also giving my eulogy in the third person. please spare me your inevitable questions about the logistics of that, and just go with it. arden russell jennings was born in a blizzard on december 26th, 2002 in new york, and she maintained until the end of her life that new york city is indeed the greatest city in the world. she had one younger brother, many pets throughout her life, and an amazing extended family. she believed that her draw to strong communities started and finished with her bond with her family – it was their annual reunions, massive email chain, and overflowing love and support that defined her standards for a tight knit group of people. in fact, in conversation with her father he declared that “community is essential for you” (chris jennings – moreau fye week five), something she agrees with for herself. even pope francis urges us to internalize that “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). arden attended the convent of the sacred heart starting when she was four, and here she once again found amazing people and a fully invested community. her teachers gave her the greatest gift they could: a love of learning. they were role models for her throughout her life, enough so that she considered becoming a teacher just to be able to give that same gift to future children. her classmates were people who became some of her best friends, and by senior year she reflected that her grade was close enough to be considered a family. then came time for college. to put it simply, arden did not want to go to college. she loved her high school and her life in new york, and she had no desire for any of it to change. honestly, she didn’t feel ready. and yet, college was inevitable; it was the next step on the ladder of life. needless to say, she was stressed about making such a huge decision about her life. her parents recall the weeks looking up to the application as “tearful.” she put a lot of pressure on herself to make the absolute best decision, and it wasn’t until later in her life that she would realize there is never one perfect decision. life is “a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services – moreau fye week four). what is so important to know, and what she hopes all of you here today know, is that we are the masters of our own destinies, and there is no one destiny that needs to be fulfilled. have faith that you are the person you need to be, and that you are becoming the one you will need to be. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ thus, the end of august 2021 rolled around and her time at the university of notre dame began. it was a change in her life that was so crucial she never imagined her life beyond it. she knew she would go to college, but after that the page was completely blank, there wasn’t even a brainstorm about her life. friends? yes, in an ambiguous sense she knew she would make friends, and she did indeed form the most wonderful connections with those she had the pleasure of meeting. she always found it crazy how close she could get to people who she had met only a few months prior. her aim in making friends was to remember that “people of goodwill can disagree,” as father hesburgh so eloquently put it decades ago (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). once again, the beauty of community shone through in her life. what was she passionate about? what would she do for a career? she didn’t even know her major at the beginning of school, a crisis that frequently progressed into an external monologue that her roommates were amused to listen to. despite the stress and struggles, things started falling into place, and notre dame was soon a place she considered home. her mom would even joke that she was only visiting when she came to see her family over breaks, and soon she would be able to return to her “real home.” ironic though it was, there was a hint of truth there: sights of cavanaugh hall and main building were soon as natural as any other environment could be. as is noted by byrd: “half the confusion in the world comes with not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). the place she lived in and the things she owned had no real consequence on her life; the people who surrounded her and the memories they made together were what brought vitality to her life. unfortunately, i must end my narrative of her life now given that my knowledge of it stops here. i know, however, that no matter how the rest of the story goes, arden will remain at her core the same person. she would want to be remembered as someone who knew how to make people laugh, who expressed her love of those around her and her awe of the beauty of the world. those who knew her best can easily remember her disrupting conversations or pausing a movie to run outside and look at how pretty the sky was. she was highly self-critical and strived to become the best version of herself always, in all that she did. it is found that “people who possess greater insight…enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd – moreau fye week six), and arden strived to consistently seek knowledge toward this ideal. it is with great sorrow that we recall the transience of her life, but with great joy that we celebrate her. as sister aletheia preaches, “remember your death” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die ” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). it is in remembering the finitude of our lives that we may find ways to live them more fully. thank you all for coming. peace and donuts. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html microsoft word jpavlockcapstoneintegration pavlock 1 professor helm moreau fye spring 2022 april 29, 2022 the next three years: all i have in store my mission (moreau fye week 13): lives his life in the pursuit of serving others. his service is not exclusive to picking up litter or fundraising. jordan dedicates himself to serving in more intangible ways. every day he wakes up knowing that he is blessed with the ability to be a positive force in the world. he can be a good friend. he can be an outlet for others. he can be a caring son and brother. he can do the small things and the big things to leave people with a positive impact, no matter the size. “thank you.” “please.” “good job!” “nice bro!” “let’s go!” with phrases like these, he tries to impart positive energy, not only to those who “need it,” but to anyone because everyone deserves it. jordan especially tries to respect and accompany those who need it the most. the bullied, the hated, and the reviled may have their humanities set aside by many, but jordan recognizes that no matter who someone is or what they have done, they deserve to be seen and cared for. jordan realizes that it is not what he has that makes him rich but the relationships that he shares with the people around him. therefore, he works to foster the strong and meaningful ones in family, school, and everywhere else. he does not need to make lots of money or be famous. his most important goal is to use who he is, his existence, to better the lives of the people around him. pavlock 2 in line with my mission statement, i plan to achieve many different things in the next three years. after all, i do not have forever to live. of course, “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull” (sister theresa aletheia noble – cited in “meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). first and foremost, i want to continue to serve others by being a good friend, brother, and son. additionally, i have been meaning to begin doing some quantifiable volunteering but have not been able to during my first year. this summer, i want to find a meaningful organization to volunteer for in the fall. in line with my mission statement, i want to accompany people who need it, especially those looked down upon by society, such as the homeless or imprisoned. “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). in accompanying others, i will not only help them. they will also help me. this summer, in addition to finding a group to serve, i want to do some work regarding finding my career direction. notice that i use the term direction instead of path. as i have learned in moreau this semester, we do not go to college to prepare for a single job but for various opportunities that will change as life goes on. i have a three-step plan for tackling this personal challenge: “step 1: learn about yourself / step 2: study what you enjoy and get involved / step 3: explore careers” (navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). during the summer, i will mainly use my spare time to fulfill the first step, learning about myself. i plan to write for five minutes each day about my interests, hopes, dreams, and what i enjoy. then, i can review this information to better pavlock 3 understand myself before coming back in the fall. if i have any breakthroughs, i will email my advisor right away! though trying to find a career direction is daunting, i rely on the support of my peers and family to reassure myself that i am doing alright. my mom tells me, “you’re on the right path. you just don’t know which one yet!” (discernment conversation activity – with my mom – moreau fye week 5). at the end of the day, i am working hard to unlock doors in the future, regardless of whether i know what those doors will be. a massive item on my three-year to-do list is to regain my health. i have had chronic pain all over my legs for the past three years, and i have just recently begun going to physical therapy to try and strengthen my muscles and tendons (it is working!). especially this summer, i plan to continue building strength so that i can take my life back. i even quit my job in landscaping to give myself the rest i need to find success. that sucked, but it is for the greater good. a quote from moreau fye week 6 inspires me to do what i must. it reads, “i encourage others to focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet” (5 minutes: a grotto short film by jihoon kim – moreau fye week 6). all i want is to run, cut firewood, bike, and hike. but i can’t. however, i can do stretches. i can do my strengthening exercises. i can take ice baths. i can and will do what i need to get better, no matter how long it takes. before i came to notre dame, i did not know many people that were different from me. in my small town, nearly everyone was white, and we were all pretty similar. after my first year at notre dame, i am happy to say that i have become a much more aware and conscientious person. in moreau week 10, i learned about white fragility, which i had experienced but could not put into words. as dr. robin d’angelo puts it, “not often encountering these (racial) pavlock 4 challenges, we withdraw, defend, cry, argue, minimize, ignore, and in other ways push back to regain our racial position and equilibrium. i term that push back white fragility” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo – moreau fye week 10). i also learned about how we communicate, particularly online. i especially enjoyed learning about bubbles and echo chambers. i learned that “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). i bring these past experiences up as precursors to what i plan to do in the future. in the next three years, i plan to continue diversifying my perspective by interacting with people who are different from me. as pope francis puts it, “the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a "you" and themselves as part of an ‘us’ (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). i plan to think critically about my perspective so that i can identify any prejudices i have and address them. the best way for me to become a more inviting person is to challenge who i am and how i think to become better over the next three years and beyond. during my time at notre dame, i want to serve a marginalized community as an ally. i particularly enjoyed doing the allyship activity during week 12. i chose to attend “the clothesline project,” a display of shirts that had survivors’ stories of rape, sexual assault, or domestic violence written on them (allyship activity – the clothesline project – moreau fye week 12). i learned more about the problems of abuse and also went to the grotto to say some special prayers. next fall, i want to participate in more allyship activities. specifically, i want to get more involved with the gender relations center. there, i can learn more about issues of sexual pavlock 5 discrimination, assault, and abuse and be a steward of awareness and support. i want to participate in and help with some of their events. i can also use who i am to influence my peers to be sensitive and inquiring about these issues. hopefully, i can inspire my friends to see gender-relations issues in a healthy, activism-oriented way. i want to develop a healthier life-work balance in the next three years. i have become more efficient and less stressed this past year, though i have a long way to go. in particular, i plan to value breaks more in the future. i want to maintain a “one-hour sabbath” each day in which i do no work and only relax. a quote from moreau fye week 1 inspires me to work on my work-life balance. it reads, “one day, mahatma gandhi was said to have woken up and told those around him, ‘this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.’ his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. ‘i’ll have to meditate for two,’ he spelled out” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). i, like gandhi, am realizing that the more work i have, the more i must rest. not the other way around. i want to deepen my faith during my remaining time at notre dame. this year, i did not have much progress in my faith. however, most recently, i have been thinking about going to church as part of a faith community rather than as an individual. each week i see my same alumni hall dawgs at mass. thinking about our togetherness has helped me to feel more faithful. it is essential that we pray together for others and each other. as eppie lederer put it in hesburgh, “pray for me, father, and i’ll pray for you. this way we’ll both be covered, no matter what” (eppie lederer (ann landers) cited in hesburgh, 39:40 – moreau fye week 2). in the next three years, i will deepen my faith relationship with my fellow dawgs by going to mass and praying together each week. pavlock 6 there is a lot on my plate for these next three years. i plan to do great things. i want to begin volunteering, become a more active ally, regain my physical health, become a more conscientious person, develop a healthier life-work balance, and deepen my faith. however, even if i do not achieve all these things, i will at least continue to be a light in others’ lives. as i wrote in my eulogy: every time you interact with someone, you leave a little bit of yourself with them. even if they don’t remember you, by interacting with them, you have changed their life. i try to be a positive force in the lives of everyone i meet because that way, i am leaving others with a positive bit of myself. if i can make the lives of others better, and they do so for more people, and so on, i never really die, even if no one knows my name (integration iii – moreau fye week 8). goals aside, i plan to keep up the good work by positively impacting others. that is the core of my mission, today and forever. week 8-integration 3 jill mcentee the life i lived when i think about the last chapter of my life, i would like to be remembered as someone who had regrets. i recently listened to a podcast that described the importance of having regrets throughout your life. i was surprised at first to hear this, however quickly i gained an understanding about what the ted speaker was describing. people that have regrets during their lifetime are normal, and our regrets show us what matters most. therefore, our regrets illustrate how we want to live the rest of our lives. so many people make mistakes and hold to them for so long, however that is what shaped the rest of their lives. i would also like to be remembered as someone whose achievements are not mentioned. i do not care about what i did or how i could be described, but rather how i made people feel. i would define a life well-lived as a life full of people that teach me something different every day. i want to look up 10 years from now and see that i am not in the same place as i was today. an observable sign that i lived a life well-lived is that i am not making the same mistakes at eighty that i am making at eighteen. i would first like to talk in my eulogy about my ambition and adventurous attitude towards helping people. moreover, kiersten dehaven’s domer dozen speech was very insightful and eye-opening. it was very interesting to learn about her path to ethiopia and what she does for women entrepreneurs there. in my future i would like to have an international influence just as kiersten dehaven does. i have always had an interest in traveling abroad and working internationally especially under a women centered organization. kiersten’s path seems untraditional and full of passion for faith and her community. i was extremely inspired by her dedication and commitment. in my future i would like to work world-wide with people who each contribute different amazing qualities to our job. therefore, in my eulogy i would like to start by talking about my dreams and aspirations through helping others.(“domer dozen”, by kiersten dehaven moreau fye week two) moreover, at eighteen i think discovering myself can be found in how family and friends perceive us. a lot of issues are important to me on a societal level because i am interested in society and people. one of my own qualities that i have learned over the course of my life is that i live each day excited to talk to people with all different perspectives. i know that every day i can learn from new people and experiences. however, my friend ella articulated to me that although i can be spontaneous and adventurous, i am sometimes impulsive in my decisions. overall i really enjoyed this opportunity to talk to ella (conversation with my friend ella moreau fye week five). moreover, as the career center stated, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life! “this quotation resonates with me because i find myself constantly preoccupied with the thought of a perfect future or a five year plan. i have always been one to love testing the waters and trying all different new classes and things. in the career center article it talks about exploration and many other important ways of trying new careers. however, something that also stood out to me was the paragraph speaking about doing a https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ job that you love. in my life i would like to choose a job that i love that does not feel like work every day. (“navigating your career journey” by career centermoreau fye week four) ultimately, in “a grotto story,” dr. lim was truly an inspiration. i can not imagine how his accident impacted his life and turned it upside down. it was inspirational to learn about the progress that dr. lim had made. he referred to many of the negative conversations that he had within himself towards his life and dreams .he also discussed how he complained a lot during this time because it felt like his world was over. however he realized over time that he had many gifts and a life under god worth living. thus. in the grotto video it was very clear that mr. lim had begun to appreciate not just the little details of life, but his relationship with god. more specifically, the 5 minutes every day that he must recline his chair he used to pray and establish a strong relationship with god. (“a grotto story” by mr. lim moreau fye week six). in my life, although it is cliche i would like to actually take time to appreciate the little moments. similarly, i would like to accomplish appreciating the little things in life by slowing down. from the lyer article i learned the science behind slowing down and taking a break every day. although this proves to be crucially important for our work and stress levels, it also seems a bit unrealistic for a stressed college student. although it may be unrealistic to put away an hour of time to do nothing, i am going to try to put away 5 minutes each day away from the stimulation of my phone and computer. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week one). in my life i would like to slow down and take time for the people around me. in my life my focus is not on the success or achievements, it is on the relationships we make and the paths that they take to create these relationships. this part of the integration is the hardest part for me to grasp: acceptance that life will end. sister aletheia wrote, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” this quote resonated with me because i think death is a fear that we all have. we spend so much time thinking about the future when in reality we don’t know what that future looks like. the overused phrase of, 'you only live once, '' this embodies sister thereas’s perspective. we all act like life is continuing and continuing and continuing when in reality that is not the perspective we should have. that mindset makes it possible for us to procrastinate our dreams and fears and face reality. we keep pushing away opportunities to help people and achieve our goals because we think that we will always have tomorrow. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” “by sister aletheia moreau fye week three). in my life, i would like to focus less about a 10 year plan and more like a 10 day or week plan. instead of acting like i have an infinite amount of time to live out my dreams, i want to make them possible tomorrow. ultimately, all that matters in my life are relationships. pope francis’ ted talks talk about the importance of our relationships, i believe that is at the core of my dreams and aspirations. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) in the end i would like to be remembered by how i made people feel. in my lifetime i would have liked to have impacted 10 lives for the better. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration the good life what is the good life, or a life well-lived? many philosophers have strived to �nd the answer to this existential question, but each answer is di�erent for each person. i believe that to pursue a life well-lived, i should deepen my understanding, embrace my gratitude, tend to those in need, and achieve a state of mindfulness. creating a lifestyle around these practices will give me a meaningful life, and sculpt me into a better person. the �rst step to pursuing a life well-lived, one has to live their life. many people tend to act irrationally to the fear that their days are coming to an end, however, one should focus on making well-thought-out decisions. as lyer stated, "the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down." (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). one should focus on gaining a radical mindset and making the most of their day. by living each day, with a new purpose, and goal in mind, one can come to achieve small milestones. however, one must know that their time is limited on earth. as sister aletheia said, “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing…remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly di�cult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). knowing the limited time that one has, she never turned down an opportunity. we should strive to live like sister aletheia to truly appreciate our days and live a life embracing gratitude and mindfulness. apart from making each day count, one should always put self-care �rst. however, doing it to an extent as one “can spend endless amounts of time in self-re�ection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started”(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau week six). one should journal to keep count of the lows, and highs of their days, to become more appreciative of their lives. i believe that with this practice one will �nd what gives their life meaning. after �nding what factors make you want to wake up every morning to pursue your life, then you should work towards keeping them beside you. however, this self-care can only go so far, one must also aspire for self-love, and believe in themselves. as jacob pointed out, “i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). to have a good life, one must believe that they are good enough for it. if one does not believe in themselves, then how can they believe that they will meet their aspirations in life? one should constantly practice achieving this mindset that they can do anything they set their mind to, and should not close any doors due to fear that they are not good enough. during my time at notre dame, i want to nurture this mindset, and not let myself degrade my abilities to strive as a student or person. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/#:~:text=we%20can%20spend%20endless%20amounts,of%20sydney%20psychologist%20anthony%20m. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 having self-care is good to an extent, however, one should seek towards helping others as well. my mission in life consists of building a better future for younger generations and i will achieve this by helping create a brighter and more peaceful environment. by uniting my community, and seeking my great desire for peace, i will make a ripple in the water, leaving an impact on those who surround me. just like father hesburgh, she “loved to watch people who didn’t agree with anything get in a room and bridge all of that” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau fye week two). i want to live a life �lled with peace, even though there is no sign of it. by participating in community service clubs on campus such as operation smiles, and best buddies, i will be able to make a di�erence, even if it is a small one. i also want to live a life where i strive for equality regardless of one’s ethnicity, belief, gender, and culture. at notre dame, i am a woman in stem, and every day i strive towards pushing down the gender stereotypes inside engineering. i am director of social media in the society of women engineering (swe), and throughout my time at nd, i want to grow into becoming an in�uential member of the club. all humanity is equal, and no one should be treated otherwise. according to the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross, “all of us as a single brotherhood are joined in one communal response to the lord’s mission” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 search” moreau fye week 12). there is great importance in surrounding ourselves with those who di�er from us, as that is how one becomes more knowledgeable. according to dr. blaschko, we should be "intentional about the information we expose ourselves to…" ("big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). at notre dame, i want to interact with people from all walks of life, and ultimately learn from their experiences. to live a life well-lived, one must surround themselves with people who give meaning to their life. creating friendships with those who cross your path, and never hesitate to take the initiative to be someone one could count on. i want to live by the words of pope francis, “the future you: the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters because life �ows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” ted talk by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i want to create meaningful friendships and become a friend that encourages and motivates others. a life well-lived can not be lived in solidarity with just one person, as humanity is meant to form deep connections and should always be based on goodness and love. at notre dame, i want to continue building relations with my peers and strengthen my friendships. i will always work towards the student body conquering challenges academically, emotionally, and spiritually together. reifenberg states, "the beauty of using accompaniment is blurring the lines between them and us, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together towards a better future." ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). as an engineer, i believe in the importance of teamwork and want to continue growing in being a good teammate. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/147236 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit at notre dame, i aspire to continue strengthening these virtues and involve them in my everyday life. through clubs, intramural sports, and classes, i will ful�ll these dynamics, and devote my time and energy to nurturing my mind, soul, and heart. my freshman year has been one of the most important places that will allow me to continually �nd myself, and cultivate my mindset. capstone moreau valeria pérez negrón professor theo helm moreau fye apr 29, 2022 my first year lessons of life: my goal is to have a successful, balanced and meaningful life. but it's easier said than done. during this semester each week, i have reflected on different ways to achieve this goal. but i think the first thing we should do is look at our life in an objective way. it's hard to see things clearly when we're wrapped up in our routines and only see the obvious. that is why i have learned that we must try to look at things from another perspective. "it's only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture." (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this will help us to be able to reflect on our life, on what we are doing right or wrong, and what steps we should take to improve. once i am clear about my virtues and defects, i have to understand that not everyone is going to agree with my way of seeing life. my priorities and desires are unique and individual. many times there will be people along the way who think differently from me, but this should not deviate me from my goal. in order to lead a well-lived life, i have to be clear about my goals, work hard and persistently to achieve them, avoiding being sidetracked by situations or people that could represent a threat in order to make the difference i want. a quote that i am going to apply to achieve this is: “but i took a stance for something and i wasn't about to stop”, (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two), because it is the way in which we can be more faithful to our wishes. in order to be that focused, i have to discover my true vocation and be able to align myself with https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 the needs of my community. this is why it is necessary to listen to the people around us, listen to their needs, and understand how my vocation and my skills can make a difference in society. it is useless to make an effort and work on a goal if it does not translate into a benefit for others, even when we are not recognized. “we have to be willing to hear what others need and to give ourselves in response even when our attempt to respond may not be appreciated” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). we certainly do not come with a book of instructions that tells us what our vocations, abilities, and challenges are going to be. at my age, it is difficult to understand what i am going to be good at, which of my skills is the best to make my life meaningful, and what things i still need to improve. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the watersjust get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). there is no other way to know what we are or are not good at if we don’t just try and experiment. we also have tools in our close family and friends. our mothers are the beings who know us best, that is why she is always one of my reference people when it comes to seeking to know a little more about me. "it's okay to want to make a difference and push others to do the same, but you have to understand that not everyone has the same priorities or the same personality as you, and not everyone sees life the same way you do." (“week five discernment conversation activity” by sheila negron moreau fye week five). these words of my mother focus on an important point of me that i have to improve and it is not expecting others to share my point of view. do not judge those who do not understand or who only focus on their reality. “any time you're getting defensive, you're getting less effective. when you get defensive, your thinking becomes rigid and you simply become stupid,” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 fye week six). this is why i must always try to put myself in the other person's shoes to be less rigid and try to understand the other's point of view, even if it is not compatible with my opinion. in the end, we are all connected, we are all in this world sharing and looking for our own way. what we do in our life directly affects others and vice versa. we are not independent beings, “everything is connected, and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i think that throughout the years we've lost that concept of connection to others. in the end, we must live thinking about how they will remember us when we are not here, and how much impact we had on the lives of others. in my case “a canvas full of brushstrokes with purpose” (“integration” by valeria perez moreau fye week eight), as i wrote in my integration in the middle of the semester. achieve integration with others as a single entity, where i understand that everything done in my life will have been for the common good. “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i believe that erasing that line that separates us, will help me achieve my mission of achieving a life that leaves an important and significant mark for others. we have all been created in the image and likeness of god, we are more equal than different and as a puerto rican woman who knows what it feels like to be seen differently by others, it is my goal to help others feel included and have the same opportunities, and rights, especially in the area of health, which is what i want to dedicate myself to in the future. we should never feel less, nor should we let someone else feel less because "god doesn't make shit." (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 to achieve a broader vision and to be able to better understand others in our walk, we must expose ourselves to different points of view and information. that is why “we should be intentional about the info we expose ourselves to” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven), in order to get out of our concepts and ideas and understand other ideas, and have a more globalized point of view. in this way, we can be fairer when we create our allyships or the groups of people we want to help. sometimes our vision is cloudy and we stop helping or doing what is necessary for the people who need it most. an example is the underprivileged communities, many times they are marginalized in this society, and many people just want to take away all their rights to get them to return to their country. they do not see the other side of the coin, their contribution to society, and the basic needs that we could provide them. that is why during the moreau class allyship project i worked with a clinic that focused on providing free medical care to this population. and as i said: “my future goal is to bring this same concept to my island and in this way be able to provide quality holistic health services for people who don’t have the resources to receive it.” (“allyship project” by valeria perez moreau fye week twelve). i want in the future to be able to help marginalized and often judged communities to be able to obtain basic health services. that is why after analyzing the thirteen weeks of class my mission remains the same, "be guided by love and respect so that when we are not here anymore we allow ourselves to be role models for the new generations" (“mission statement” by valeria perez moreau fye week thirteen). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s capstone integration williams 1 mckenzie williams prof. whittington capstone integration april 17, 2022 putting my mission into action my mission is to dedicate my life to developing relationships with others and expanding my education (in efficient ways) to further guide me to a life well-lived (“qqc week 13” by mckenzie williams moreau fye week thirteen). in my first year at notre dame, i discovered a new appreciation for expanding my relationships by meeting new people and seeking to learn new educational concepts. i have made these two objectives a priority and will endeavor over these next three years to become stronger in these areas, and in turn, become a stronger human being. for the next three years at notre dame and thereafter i will live a life of loyalty filled with many different friendships. as i continue my journey in college, i desire to further grow not just academically, but in my relationships. i want to put myself out there to meet and engage with as many different people as possible. with these relationships, i will grow by hearing different perspectives while also being able to provide my own. dr. blaschko explains the dangers of an echo chamber by discussing, “echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles, partly because of their ability to lock us into certain world views” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). an echo chamber actively removes people from groups who disagree with them. in this way, you are blocking out everyone’s voice on the matter and are not allowing yourself to be open to disagreement and debate. people learn and grow more when they are surrounded by people with dissimilar experiences and opinions. i believe https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1jrrfibhhxtggk_k8vliydt4xhgp4jk7rhxc2acwy1si/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s williams 2 we, as a community, should actively seek discussions with people who both agree and disagree on topics to be more exposed to information. before attending college, i grew up in the same town pretty much my entire life with the same friends and community. almost everyone from my hometown, tampa, chooses to stay in-state for college. however, i knew that if i stayed in florida i would be surrounded by the same people i have been around my entire life for an additional four years. this was a significant factor in deciding to attend a college seventeen hours away from home. upon arriving at notre dame, i met people and learned how different their lives have been compared to mine based on where they come from and other factors. i do not regret my college decision. by attending this university and being surrounded by new people with different experiences, i have grown to further appreciate differing viewpoints and perspectives, and how these viewpoints can help me grow in wisdom. this year, i have joined and been involved in two clubs: camp kesem and the pre-dental club. everyone in these clubs are members for similar reasons and we share this connection; however, we all have different backgrounds and can learn from one another. by being involved in these organizations, i have formed new relationships that i otherwise would not have, had i chosen not to get involved. i hope to continue to be involved in these clubs for the next three years at notre dame. i believe that the opportunities from these clubs can further assist me in my goals of pursuing a life well-lived. father hesburgh emphasized the importance of differing opinions. he stated, “at a university you cannot censor ideas if they disagree with your own” (“hesburgh” by barca and o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh knew how essential it is to listen to others even if they have differing views. he believed that if something was wrong in the country, then it is an individual's responsibility to fix it because it is also their problem. father hesburgh left a https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 williams 3 major legacy and impact on notre dame as the university’s president. what we, as students of this university, should value from his legacy is fighting for what we believe in while making sure to respect the opinions of others. this affords everyone the opportunity to present their points of view. this is something i truly appreciate about the notre dame community and furthermore has been practiced in the moreau course. on campus, there are so many clubs and outlets for students to share their opinions. while i have only become involved in two clubs thus far, in the future, i hope to get involved in more clubs and/or become even further involved in my existing clubs. to strengthen my involvement in camp kesem, i decided to become a counselor for this summer’s camp. additionally, in the hopes of enhancing my involvement in the pre-dental club, i applied for an officer position for the 2022-2023 school year. i am a person who excels when surrounded by others. however, in a setting where i don’t know anyone or i am meeting someone for the first time, i am pretty shy and will not go out of my way to get to know people. i have always struggled with shyness, and this year in particular i have been working more to challenge myself and meet new people. “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac moreau fye week ten). every single person brings value to a community, and it is very important to acknowledge this fact. we tend, without knowing, to socialize with individuals similar to ourselves because this is what we are used to and it makes us feel comfortable in situations. however, we are doing a disservice to ourselves. when we are not being inclusive, we are losing the opportunity to engage and learn from other individuals who bring value that enriches our lives. i was the only one in my circle of friends at home to go to notre dame. in this new environment knowing few https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ williams 4 people on campus, i have been forced to come out of my comfort zone, meet new people, and form new relationships. this single act of pushing myself to meet new people has been extremely helpful in overcoming and facing my shyness barrier. i still have a long way to go but i have made a good start and will continue over the next three years to work on this obstacle. by continuing to emphasize developing relationships as a key part of my mission, i will be more inclined to meet people and become more comfortable in new social settings. additionally, i will be welcoming to and supportive of my peers and will hope for the same in return. i believe a strong support system is crucial for a life well-lived; it is essential to have people to go to in times of need because carrying the weight of a problem all on your own can do more harm than good. “to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.). the fostering of a community of friends who can be honest with us and whom we can genuinely hear, before whom and with whom we can be open and humble” (“three key questions” by himes moreau fye week three). our peers are there to support us and help guide us to our full potential. we would be lost in many ways if we did not have the help of the people around us. i am an individual who excels when i have a good, strong support system. i am very lucky and blessed to have built an amazing support system here at notre dame. i have formed such meaningful friendships throughout this year, and these are people that i hope to have in my life for a very long time. it is crazy to think that i have only known everyone here for less than a year. some of the friends i have made, i feel like i have known forever. i know that my friends will continue to be a strong support system for the next three years and hopefully after college. the relationships i have built and future relationships i will build at notre dame will help me grow in wisdom and guide me to a life well-lived. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 williams 5 pope francis also believes that our relationships with others are very important. “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). pope francis discusses how our interactions with others can help shape who we are. in life, it is essential to have people around us. we are not alone in this world, and we must help each other. the friendships i have made this year at notre dame have been crucial, especially because this was the first time i have been away from my family and hometown friends who had been my support system up until now. it is encouraging to know that i have people at both of my homes (tampa and notre dame) to whom i can go to for support and who i can provide support to as well. “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“mission” by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week twelve). the mission of the congregation of the holy cross is rooted in standing together with everyone (people of all races, genders, etc.); we were all created by the same creator to love our neighbors, and it is in our power to be there to offer support. i believe support is a fundamental quality of relationships. however, relationships should be beneficial with support being offered to both parties. while i am there to offer my friends assistance, it is important to make sure i also have people to turn to. the friends i have been blessed with at notre dame are always there to help me when i am down, help me when i am struggling with my schoolwork, or even just there to hang out with me when i’m lonely. i have felt comfortable offering this same support in return. i am extremely fortunate to have created such supportive friendships, and by continuing efforts to put myself out there to engage with others, i hope to create even more lasting https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ williams 6 relationships in the future. i have built healthy, balanced relationships here in my short tenure at notre dame. and for that, i am truly grateful. balanced, healthy relationships and support systems, i believe, are key to pursuing a life well-lived. i have deepened my desire to provide support to others by becoming a camp kesem counselor this summer. “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by prof. reifenberg moreau fye week nine). as a society, every individual can offer something to someone else (even when unexpected). even when we are there to be of service to others, we should act in accompaniment where both sides have a voice. we are there to help give people a voice not to be that voice. this is something i am going to put into practice by being a counselor this summer. camp kesem is a nationally recognized club offered on campus that provides support and free summer camp for children whose parents have died from or are going through the effects of cancer. i am excited to spend part of my summer with these special children and to help them have this amazing outlet that camp offers. by being a counselor, i am not going to take away their voice. instead, i will be there for them and do whatever i can to ensure they have the best time at camp. in doing so, i will help give these children not only an outlet but a heightened voice. with the rest of my undergraduate studies and hopefully my postgraduate studies in dental school, i will seek to learn and further my education for my career aspiration of being an orthodontist. by putting myself in a position to learn more, i am able to grow in wisdom, and growth is key to a life well-lived. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/modules/items/148014 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/modules/items/148014 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ williams 7 four). deciding on a career is a very important decision and one i have not taken lightly. the best way to figure out a career path is through experience. through experience, i will attain the important skills necessary to grow. i will determine what i truly value, the type of personality i have, what i find interesting, and what i am good at. toward the end of high school, i obtained an interest in becoming an orthodontist and thus in attending dental school. when matriculating to notre dame, i decided to join the pre-dental club to actively engage with the club’s members and to seek more information about my desired career path. because of the information obtained thus far from being affiliated with the pre-dental club combined with what i have learned from the moreau course concerning the importance of picking the right career, i have decided to shadow my orthodontist this summer to ensure orthodontia is the best fit for me. this is an amazing opportunity to get direct experience and be exposed to my potential occupation. i am extremely excited and grateful that my orthodontist is permitting me to shadow. she said that shadowing was an important factor in her decision-making process, and i am hopeful that by shadowing i will obtain the same validation of a career path in orthodontia. in these next three years of college, if i decide to stay on the orthodontia track, i will continue to gain more experience and knowledge through community volunteering, more shadowing of professionals in the field, and my pre-dental club membership. by focusing on my future education and career, i am allowing myself to grow in wisdom and be better guided towards a life well-lived. to ensure maximum success, it is my responsibility to work hard and give everything my full effort. an individual learns best when giving their all. everything we do can be an opportunity to show growth and it is essential to understand and capitalize on these opportunities to help in seeking a life well-lived. “a main theme throughout the conversation was my work ethic and determination to accomplish goals” (“qqc 5” by mckenzie williams moreau fye https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tmjo473kmgnjpuz3wj4mps7pkodw2fyrxgbh77dthui/edit williams 8 week five). in the first half of moreau this semester, each of us had a conversation with someone where we could gain insight about ourselves from another person’s perspective. i chose to talk to my mom because out of everyone in this world she knows me best. while talking to her, she continued to emphasize my hard work and determination, which are traits i believe are critical for a life well-lived. although these traits first developed in competitive all-star cheerleading, they have carried into my academics and other activities. because of the academic rigor and caliber at this university, i have had to work harder than ever when it comes to my education. with this academic rigor has also come exposure to many different subjects. this fall semester was the first time in my educational career that i didn’t take a history course. although i love learning in my science courses at notre dame, i realized i miss other subjects that interest me. throughout high school, i was very well-rounded with my course selections. i miss the opportunities these varied subjects provided in my educational growth. in high school; however, history was never my favorite subject. i realized this wasn’t because of the material being taught but instead how the classes were approached. in deciding my schedule for this semester, i started to look at the history courses offered to fulfill the university’s core 6 requirement. i was surprised at how interested i was in some of the course descriptions. currently, i am enrolled in a class called fdr to obama, and the topics covered in this course have helped in my decision to declare a minor in history. the notre dame courses offered are varied and focused on specific subject matter, as opposed to the general courses offered at my high school. if i didn’t decide to try something new and expand my wisdom by taking a history course, i would have never decided to minor in history. by emphasizing hard work, i have been granted the opportunity to further expand my studies. my education thus far at notre dame has pushed me to think deeper and formed a desire to seek more information. in these next three years, i hope to gain more williams 9 knowledge in all of my courses with a preprofessional studies major in the college of science and a history minor. although i have always placed a huge emphasis on hard work and determination, sometimes it is necessary to take a moment to reflect and get back on track before returning to something. it is my responsibility to make sure the activities i am doing are not hindering my progress, but instead are beneficial to my success. by continuing on an efficient track and not letting something hinder my progress, i will better pursue a life well-lived. “that’s the reason american football players prefer to go into a huddle rather than just race toward the line of scrimmage, the reason a certain kind of writer will include a lot of blank space on a page, so his sentences have room to breather (and his readers, too)” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by iyler moreau fye week one). when people are constantly doing things throughout their day and never taking the time to relax and breathe, they can lose focus on their goals and on themselves. it is essential to take some time during the day to just reflect on yourself and make sure you are on the right track. oftentimes we lose ourselves without even knowing it, and it isn’t until we step back and look at our life from an outside perspective that we can get back to what’s familiar. i have realized that this is something i have done with my school work this year while being at notre dame. i tend to get frustrated very easily if i cannot understand a topic or can’t get a problem correct. i have realized that the best thing to do is take a break and do other work or anything in general to get my mind off of the frustration. then, i can come back to the problem refreshed and hopefully in a better position to tackle it. this has been an extremely helpful outlet. just taking the time to relax and a moment to readjust has helped a lot in getting me back on track and refocused. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ williams 10 additionally, i believe self-reflection is essential in better understanding one’s self, and in turn, setting one up for a life well-lived. while in college, i have placed a greater emphasis on taking some time for self-reflection. “a good rule of thumb, then, is that why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective” by eurich moreau fye week six). these “what” questions can better help people identify their emotions which can be the best place to start when trying to understand what you need at that moment. these reflection questions have been a key part of my college experience. oftentimes i do not know how to better a situation or where to go next, so taking the time to make sure i am on the right track and not doing something that can hinder my progress has been very beneficial. although, at times this reflection has been hard. “sometimes you don’t want to hear things that are necessary, but knowing these things can help you become a better version of yourself” (“mckenzie williams a life of many values ” by mckenzie williams moreau fye week eight). hearing things that i need to hear but don’t necessarily want to can be especially hard when it comes to my studies. it has been a little difficult to adjust to new study habits for college, and at times it has been hard to digest criticism. however, i have become better at listening to advice and applying it to my studies. i feel that this semester i have developed more efficient study habits, and i aspire to continue to grow in this area over the next three years. i believe developing relationships and seeking wisdom is key to growth. these are factors i have begun to place a huge emphasis on in my college career, and i hope to continue to emphasize these skills in the future. by learning more and building new relationships, i have already begun to grow so much as a person. i am definitely on my journey to pursuing a life well-lived, and i hope to continue to become stronger and grow throughout this process. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1g-3bykvtcvawzlefwbktz6pso8xve4hdrpq9afjxwsq/edit mission statement: i, geisen, have made it my mission to foster growth and discovery in the hearts and minds of all, including myself. i will provide space, support, and opportunities for others to learn about themselves and to explore their passions. i have both witnessed and experienced the lack of these things in my community and will devote myself to changing this while and after discovering my identity and my vocation. i will show love, since it is necessary to those seeking the confidence to grow and discover. i will use my energy to motivate myself and others. i will use my ability to throw myself at everything to discover my passions. i will use my sense of leadership to convince others to do the same and to provide a voice to those who are not yet sure of themselves enough to speak up themselves. i will use my vocation to aid in discovery by making discoveries of my own and by designing or tweaking methods of discovery. i do this because i value growth and discovery, i support passion and love, and i believe in people as a whole and as individuals. i will serve others in this way because i know my feelings towards these matters will help me to serve best in these ways. as i fulfill my mission, i aim to keep in mind that i also need to give myself space, support, and opportunities for growth and discovery. i will grow to realize that i too am worthy of what i believe is so important. i will grow in patience for myself and those who frustrate me. i will acknowledge that my weaknesses can be explored and altered and that my ‘quirks’ make my methods of service possible. my mission statement has a lot to unpack. i decided while writing it to not focus on just one thing but to write about what matters most to me and what i want to do with my life. throughout the moreau course, i have been forced to reflect on my life and to use it to discover my values and my desires for the future. one of my realizations is that i am dedicated to service. growing up, service meant volunteering and going on missions trips, but i’ve come to learn that service comes in all forms, and it doesn’t have to be big. service can be tutoring during lunch and after school, making discoveries in your field, or even listening to a friend in need. i believe that whatever i do in life, it will involve service. while i believe service is important for everyone, i wanted to ask myself the three questions posed by fr. hines and consider if service could be a vocation of mine. service fulfills me. when i am helping others or contributing to a field or cause, i am happy. others say that i am good at what i do. according to them, i am a good listener, a good tutor, and good at problem solving in the fields that interest me. and finally, i believe there is a shortage and need of service in our world (“three key questions” by fr. hines moreau fye week three). my mission statement, in short, represents my dedication to service for the next three years and beyond. if my answers to the three questions are any indication, my mission statement describes how i want to orient my life. for the next three years, my mission statement will animate my life in the way that i choose to interact with my field and with others. in my field, it is harder to contribute as a student not yet introduced to the workforce, but there are still ways to do this. for example, students at notre dame have ample opportunities for research and internships. in these, we can help our team’s progress and contribute to discovery or progress in your field. in regards to how i interact with others and provide space, support, and opportunities for others to learn about themselves and to explore their passions, there are also some concrete things i can do. it is hard to quantify how open someone is to other people, but i will always be available to others, whether through text, call, or face to face. i aspire to be like father hesburgh, always available to those who want to stop in and chat, except you won’t have to climb through a window to reach me (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christinemoreau fye week two). i can also continue to take part in lqbtq groups on campus to better support my peers. this will further allow me to give a voice to those who cannot stand up for themselves yet and to welcome them into a community who loves them. this way, they can have the confidence to grow and discover. i also can be a large advocate to those drawn away from god because of what others have said to them, that they are unworthy to receive human dignity. i can fight this with my favorite quote by jacob walsh’s priest friend: “god doesn’t make shit.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau week ten)as i stated in my mission statement, i have both witnessed and experienced this space, support, and opportunities being taken away. i got away from it, and now have the strength to make sure no one else has their chance at growth and discovery. because i experienced these things and have overcome them, i am of the same mindset as dean g. marcus: “i can do something. i must do something” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole — moreau fye week twelve). the hardest part of my mission can be found in the last four sentences. no matter how burnt out i am, i rarely have a hard time serving others.the hardest part of my mission is not serving others, but serving me. i understand, though, that when i take a break from rushing around and spreading myself thin for others, i actually become more available to serve others (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i am still able to serve others, but i do not have myself all figured out yet. i have not finished discovering or growing yet, and in some ways i never will. to give myself what i find so important to give to others, i will take time for reflection as this class has taught. to grow in patience and to learn how i can use my weaknesses to my and others benefit, i have taken steps to improve my mindfulness. we learned about its importance in this class, but i have also learned from my mental health coach that only seven minutes a day can help me stay grounded and less overwhelmed. mindfulness can help me get better sleep, which i desperately need, and improve my resilience to better dedicate myself to service (“mindfulness menu” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six). that way, i can work on myself and better prepare to serve as best i can. over the course of my journey at notre dame, i know i will not be alone in my dedication to service. i can find new groups to serve alongside. the people at notre dame, for the most part, are incredibly caring and also find service important. at notre dame, my mission will be strengthened by the people around me. as pope francis says, the world is a much better place when we work together. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). when we work together, we can better serve our community. at notre dame, because we value service, i will have other people around me to recognize that service is something we do as a team. it is never one person against the other, and we can ask for help from each other. i recall the story by professor reifenberg in which he had to receive help from people. at notre dame, people want to work together and to serve each other, so that will make my mission a lot stronger. my mission is to dedicate myself to service. completing it in its fullest form will be difficult, but i have come to the conclusion that it is my vocation to serve. integration 4 - moreau first year experience prof. harrington 4/29/22 the journey of belief how do i pursue a life well-lived? this is a question many moral philosophers, great thinkers, and children have pondendered time and time again throughout the entire existence of humanity. i think it differs from person to person. while some are content with a life built through hard work and labor—like creating their own farm—others might be more drawn to a life of hopping from city to city conducting business with international partners, still others might prefer somewhat of a middle path. some prefer constant social performances and interactions, others prefer a more secluded existence. so, i believe that a life well-lived is not the same for each person. i think that throughout my second semester at notre dame—after getting settled in and adjusting during the first semester—i have had a chance to grow in my understanding of what a life well-lived looks like for me. i think the first thing that i realized about my version of a life well-lived is what kind of impact i want to have on the world. “i realized that the true effect i want to have is to change the world for the better” (“interview reflection” by moreau fye week five). however, i also made sure to heed the following statement: “does anybody need you to do it?” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). oftentimes, i will be doing something that is very enjoyable to me, but, no one is needing me to do it and then, when it is over, i have not helped anyone out at all, but rather just wasted time. i realized this first sentiment through seeing what all the great alumni of notre dame have accomplished. i was especially inspired by father hesburgh. i was incredibly impressed by what he did not only for this university but also for the united states as a whole. one skill that i admire most about https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dsktjxyhsz5xv5uuikjujry913g9jgbaattrzwsncik/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149291 father hesburgh was his ability to bring people together that would usually not talk to each other. “father hesburgh had an extraordinary ability to reach across lines” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). i hope that in the future i will grow in my ability to reach across lines and create bridges between people such that we as a society can connect and grow. another idea that has stood out to me this second semester is my pursuit of a life where i have everything i need, but not to live too much in excess. as stated, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.”” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one), and i think this sentiment can be applied to a variety of ideas and concepts. as an example, i would always try to have a lot of friends in high school, however now, i have realized that it is not the amount of people that you know or can talk to that matters, but how close those people are to you. now, i have a decent number of very close friends who i know will always support me no matter what i do. thus, i hope that i can learn to live with exactly what i need in the future. as a consequence of the amazing conversations i have had with my close friends, i have realized that for me to live my life well-lived, i have to be open and honest in conversations with everyone. it does not matter if i agree or disagree with the people i am talking to, we should still be able to communicate our ideas and be open to learn from each other. “i think that it is extremely critical that we must open the conversation to everyone—no matter the topic.” (“mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). i think it is even more important to go further than this. oftentimes, when people disagree with us, we tend to think less of them, however, i believe that for me to live my life well, i must embody the sentiment expressed in the homies organization: “‘can i give him my blood’” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149229 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ncq_fw09unz9xt3nb7cb5engau77m-_tlqseaofh8zy/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/167905 by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). it is important to value people for what they are—people, even if they do disagree with us. additionally, i have found that with those who are close to oneself, it is not always the best to tell them what you would do in their place. instead, to create a life that is well-lived, i should focus on accompaniment—“accompaniment is a path to help waken those dormant dreams.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i hope to take these three sentiments with me throughout the rest of my three years at notre dame and continue to live them after my college experience. then, i believe i will accomplish part of my life well-lived. another sentiment that i have realized i must pursue for my own life to be well-lived is that of self-improvement. however, this must not be grounded too much in self-reflection. instead, i believe i must have a healthy balance of gaining new experiences and reflecting on those experiences. as an example, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this is what started to happen to me at the start of last semester. i spent a lot of time in my dorm room thinking about what i should do and how i should approach my college experience, however, this just led to me not experiencing much at all. as the ccd states, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). thus, it was incredibly important for me to go out and experience new events, people, and live my college life. however, this can also go too far very quickly. after this happened, “this lesson made me realize that perhaps we just need to take a little breather in our busy lives and reflect on our own experiences rather than try to pick up new ones.” (“integration 3” by moreau https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1f-etudoorwne1ebzamxmhhzii9_l630flvyp3lr97cq/edit?usp=sharing fye week eight). so, i know that in the future i will balance both these sentiments. the rest of my three years at notre dame i will gain new experiences while also reflecting on these afterwards, such that i may grow as a person and pursue a life well-lived. finally, to pursue my life well-lived i must also face the issues that society is facing today. i think that “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) and i hope that i will be able to make a meaningful impact on this area during the rest of my three years of my college education. as a christian community i know that “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac guide moreau fye week ten), so i hope that this reinforcement will allow me to complete my goal. another great problem that faces society today is the lack of communication between groups that are of a different mindset. as i had emphasized earlier, i think it is incredibly important for my life to be well-lived that i communicate openly and honestly with those around me. however, this is also the case for society at large, sometimes when people disagree and interact with news, they don’t actually care. “they're there to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. they're not trying to move anyone. they're not trying to empower anything. they're really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way.” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). so, i hope that i will be able to engage people in deeper conversations about topics that really matter. in conclusion, my second semester at notre dame has taught me a lot about my version of a life well-lived. i have had many epiphanies about what shape i want my career, social circle, introspection, and broader impact to take. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149715 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149715 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ mfye integration four capstone moreau first year experience capstone integration april 29, 2022 living through life’s trials my mission statement is: “i use my leadership attributes to assist others in building healthier relationships and growing through them as well as doing so in my own relationships. i will do this by leading by example in respectful and caring ways. it is important to have quality in the relationships you hold, and everyone deserves respectful relationships in their lives. i will continue to strengthen my faith in god. i will do this by choosing to devote more time to my faith and religion. i hope that by doing this, i may rub off on others and they may strengthen their own faith as well. i will act with courage. in order to fulfill the prior statements, i must act in audacious ways. i am no help in assisting others to have healthier relationships or stronger faiths if i do not have the courage to make myself heard or do not take the lengthy steps toward change. it is my responsibility to not take any day for granted and to enjoy life one day at a time. i consider my overall happiness to be something of great importance in my life. my parents raised me using the phrase ‘choose happiness’. even when everything seems to be going wrong, i know that by choosing happiness it has the opportunity to be that much better than not making that positive choice,” ((personal mission statement by moreau fye two week thirteen) my mission statement accurately describes how i would like to orient my life. it mentions my faith, and how i care for others. it mentions happiness, which is something i strive for every day. a quote i liked from week one of this course was, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need,” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye two week one). i think this quote says a lot in one sentence. being grateful for what we have is such a necessary thing to keep in mind to find true happiness in this life. i like to be in control and try to drive my life in the right direction, towards happiness. when thinking of the direction my life is headed, i thought to use a quote from miss ruth graham, who told the new york times, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye two week three). i agree that we run from things, thinking that we will find happiness that way. i think that death is something we simply cannot avoid. by living your life with this unavoidable thought in your mind, it allows you to cherish every day god gives you. i would love others to see me working towards strengthening my faith, helping others where they need it, respecting all those around me, and more. notre dame tells people in their first year that, “there are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much right off the bat,” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye two week four). along with my career path is https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ my path of personality and growth. i think that one’s personality tells a lot about them, if they like classic rock, or if they don’t eat spaghetti, or whether they are willing to lend a hand or not. these small personality traits are seen and accounted for on a personal level. according to my father, my personal role in others’ lives is more important to me than changing the world. he said i help the people in my life work through trouble, cheer them on, and make them feel loved. he claimed that my success so far has influenced positive outcomes for the large circle of people that surround me (phone interview with pat lorenson by moreau fye two week five). when i wrote my third integration for this class, my eulogy, i chose to include that i was, “someone who had plentiful love in her heart,” (integration three, the lovely life of lily lorenson by moreau fye week eight). i think that by working towards the goal of loving others and caring about them is something that will forever be in my mission statement, no matter what happens in my life. loving others is an active choice, for you need to make the decision to give your love to that person. during this semester we watched hesburgh, and before they announce dr. martin luther king jr.’s death in the movie they show him saying, “there can be no great disappointment, where there is no great love,” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye two week two). he was talking about the war in vietnam. i thought the quote was perfect for those circumstances, but i also think that it can be used in countless others, specifically, in everyday life. i think it was good to keep in mind that disappointment does not simply come about, but instead, is a result of an action. i think that though we can all be disappointed in someone, the disappointment comes from the love and care we have for that person. one would not waste their time being disappointed if they did not love the person in question. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 to continue with dr. king’s words, he also said that, “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). loving someone is not only a choice, but also a weight to carry. it is not always easy to love, but it is in most cases necessary. everyone deserves to be loved. everyone deserves to be prayed for. i enjoy praying for others, and one of my favorite ways of doing this is by praying the rosary (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye two week six). i think it will be most difficult to strengthen my faith when life gets busy, and i think that in a controversial environment, it could be very difficult to be the first to take a step or make a suggestion about change. in our modern culture, social media stories litter our true opinions, guiding us to indecency through comparison. in the week 11 piece, hersch said that people “feel hurt that politics isn't going the way they want it,” ( “passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye two week eleven). politics should be about who is leading our country, and how they do it, but it has become a battle of hating those who aren’t republicans, or cussing out those who aren’t democrats. politics indeed isn’t going the way it should, because it has changed so much since our country was made. that is a conversation for another time, however, no matter what side of politics people stand on, i wish they could agree to love everyone equally, despite differences. it hurts my heart to know that there are so many hateful people out there that make life so terrible for people that aren’t like them. ‘majorities’ talk down to minorities and create issues. i cannot begin to imagine what it feels like for someone to tell you that you aren’t worthy of a life equal to theirs because you like the same sex or because you have a different skin color. many times these comments leave everlasting dents in one’s self esteem and self image. i wish i could tell everyone that, “god https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ doesn’t make shit,” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto moreau fye two week ten). this is a great reminder for everyone, regardless of race, sexual orientation, or class. no one should have to feel the pain of thinking they are not good enough. some people who get enough of these dents in their self love decide that it is better not to say anything than suffer the pain. i want to lend these people a hand by being an ally to them. “the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard,” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye two week nine). as someone who has always been outgoing and has always had a knack for public speaking (i began acting in second grade), i have always felt as though i can be a voice for those who are not heard. i do not only want to help others’ ideas to be heard, but also at some point again their own voices. everyone’s words are worth sharing, everyone’s feelings are valid. at this university i have the opportunity to interact with such a diverse group of people in comparison to those i grew up around. i have never been given the chance to test myself or my boundaries to learn about those who aren’t living in a rural minnesotan town made up of 3,000 people. while here, i was required to attend an allyship meeting. this is something i would have never found myself doing at home. i would rather just assume that i was well educated and knew enough to be an ally. i walked into the room and was nervous for some reason. the nervousness disappeared as all of the people in the room welcomed us visitors so kindly (allyship activity, moreau fye two week twelve). during the meeting i learned a lot about how to be an ally, and how to help other people join me. i am so glad i went because it gave me another insight on how to be a better person. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing i hope to continue to grow as a person and use my mission statement to help me in this. i want to use my leadership skills, strengthen my faith, and help those around me. i am so glad that notre dame has given me an opportunity to widen my horizons and learn so much about becoming a better human. works cited ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye two week one) ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye two week two) ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye two week three) (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye two week four) (phone interview with pat lorenson by moreau fye two week five) (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye two week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven) (integration three, the lovely life of by moreau fye two week eight) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye two week nine) (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto moreau fye two week ten) ( “passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye two week eleven) (allyship activity, moreau fye two week twelve) (personal mission statement by moreau fye two week thirteen) https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ integration 3 78 years seventy-eight years is the average life expectancy in the united states. we’ve grown up and read about how much higher the expectancy has gotten in our history textbooks, and we’re witness to the scientific revolution; we seem invincible. cars can drive themselves, hearts can be replaced, cancers can be treated. seventy-eight years always seems so far away. when you’re a kid, you’re too busy playing outside and worrying about what your crush thinks about you to have to understand why grandpa can’t come over for dinner anymore. and then you become a teenager, and you’d think at that point as you’ve witnessed more deaths and people growing old around you, you’d come to understand it more. but that’s not at all the case, instead, it just gets pushed deeper and deeper into the recesses of the mind. thinking about it for more than five minutes at a time will cause your head to fall off and you have midterms and internships to stress about anyway. now you’re an adult, and maybe now you can slow life down a little bit and smell the promised roses. but we know that’s not the case either. maybe you get your two weeks of vacation, but other than that, you’re chasing the promotion, chasing the paycheck—what does death have to do with you, you’re a businessman, a father that has to provide for his children, not a philosopher! and now maybe you’re there, on your deathbed, at the promised seventy-eight and you know your time is up. at this point, it seems like all you can think about is the death you pushed so far back into your brain, the dam of repression and avoidance crumbles, and death comes spilling out of your ears, eyes, and mouth. your grandkids want to hear your stories, but you have nothing to tell. the “i wishes” and regrets are presented in front of you for the first time. those seventy-eight years might as well have been condensed to this moment. that was the morbid and hyperbolic spiel dylan gave me when i asked what he wanted to do for a career. i’d let him go on for about ten minutes before i’d cut him off and make him actually answer the question. he relented and told me he wanted to be an oncologist since he was a kid because he felt he had the gifts to pursue it and the gifts to help others with it (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” by meruelo family center for career development, moreau fye week four). then he’d start talking about death again, so i’d change the subject to sports or how his classes were going, but i swear he could’ve gone on forever telling me about how nothing in life is guaranteed and the best thing he could do for his career and future self is to stop worrying so much about it and live in the present. he read books like tuesdays with morrie, the last lecture, and the death of ivan ilyich just to ensure that he knew what it meant to die, which you know freaked me out a little bit, but he never seemed depressed about it all. his favorite quote from all of his reading was from philosopher henry david thoreau, which reads, “i went to the woods because i wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if i could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when i came to die, discover that i had not lived. i did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did i wish to practice resignation, unless it was quite necessary. i wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms...” he loved that quote and tried to sneak it into every conversation he could even though the cinematics he added to it were straight out of dead poets society. he looked at death as something as normal as a tree sprouting, a baby being born, or a hurricane forming over the gulf; it’s inevitable, so you do your best to prepare for it and let the rest fall into place ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, moreau fye week two). even https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html though he was only there for a short time, notre dame seemed to have the biggest impact on him. not in the football games on saturday, and studying during the weeks kind of way that’s usually associated with notre; no, he was always walking around the lakes and journaling. he talked about how even just one minute of peace and quiet where you detach yourself from the world around you gives you a better picture of what you’re working with ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, moreau fye week one). i’m sure he’d be pretty pissed with this eulogy so far because i am painting him as this reclusive philosopher, so it’s time i talk about the relationships he had with others, and how all of his talks about death had more to do with living than dying. obviously, i am one of the fortunate ones to have shared a relationship with dylan. we were really close in high school, but oddly enough, we became even closer when we went to different schools. maybe it’s because we had a screen between us to be more vulnerable, but in those months of freshman year, we were texting almost every night about things we never even brought up in high school. we shot each other straight: he’d tell me when i was being a little too scared, and i’d tell him when he was being a little too arrogant. but more often than not, we were telling each other how much we loved each other (discernment conversation activity, moreau fye week five). i don’t think i’ve ever heard a guy say i love you as much as he did. i remember in high school he’d see me in the hall and light up and yell my name and hug me and tell me he loved me. i swear that smile made you feel like the most important person in the world. this dude’s 6’3”, 230 pounds running down the hall to tell you he loves you. juxtaposing this excitement, we had something called west hour in high school where you could go to tutoring, eat, ya know whatever you decided to do with your hour off. he’d go to his mom’s room while she was getting lunch and sit there for those 10 minutes or so of silence and just breathe (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald student https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing center for wellbeing). maybe he was meditating, praying, shoot he could’ve been thinking about his calculus homework for all i know, but after those ten minutes or so it was just like he drank ten red bulls; he was right back to that crazy big teddy bear self. he spent so much of his time refining himself so that he could be energized and best serve others (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, moreau fye week 7). i wish more than anything that dylan could be here to hear all of this now. i wish he could’ve had those seventy-eight years that most of us take for granted. i could go on and on about what he did for me, and i’m sure y’all could too, but it would never do justice to who he was and how he lived. father hesburgh, who he looked up to, says that “it is easier to exemplify values than teach them” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley, moreau fye week two). lived a life dedicated to exemplifying what he believed and learning what others believed. he made the most of his 19 years that we can aspire to make in our many seventy-eights. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143444 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143444 lauerman integration two moreau first year experience december 5th, 2021 who am i: the unanswerable question one of the most important questions i have asked myself this year is who i am, and do i belong here. the latter of the two questions has a lot to do with imposter syndrome, which is when you are in a situation and you feel like you do not belong or are not worthy of your current state (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizebeth cox moreau fye week nine). i have dealt with imposter syndrome in the past, however never like i have had it to the degree i do now. at the beginning of the year i was doing fine academically, but in discussions with my friends about the college admissions process i began to feel like i might not belong. in conversations, i would hear about all of my friends getting into colleges that i did not. this by itself did not make me feel worse about myself, but as my grade began to decline, it made me feel worse. as previously mentioned, i started out the year pretty strong, but my grades began to slip and in some classes they fell off of a cliff. to take a case in point, during my calculus two class on my third exam, i got the worst grade i have ever gotten on an exam. this hurt me more than i thought it would, and in combination with my previous discussion about colleges, it led to my imposter syndrome. i believe that elizebeth cox describes imposter syndrome best in saying that it is not “necessarily linked to depression, anxiety, or self-esteem.” (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizebeth cox moreau fye week nine) it leaves you a weird feeling, and there is seemingly no easy fix to make it better. i have also had to ask myself who i am this year. as i discussed in my first integration, i do a lot of learning in making mistakes, and because of my many mistakes this semester i have done a lot of self learning. a product of self learning, at least for me, is questioning who i am. one major mistake has led me to do a lot of self reflection into what i care about, what i stand for, and most importantly—who i am. i never had as much self reflection to do in my life prior to mailto:alauerma@nd.edu my mistake. i feel that this was because of a similar reason fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. mentions in his wesley theological seminary commencement speech. in his speech fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. talks about how much conviction can all be wiped away from pride and greed. (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. moreau fye week ten) to be completely honest, i still do not have answers to these questions, but with each day i feel that i am getting closer and closer to being able to answer them. one thing that was previously “black and white,” but is now more ambiguous and undefined is what is hope. prior to coming to notre dame, i only thought of hope as believing that something unlikely will happen like the philadelphia seventy sixers actually winning a championship. however, after coming to notre dame, i believe that my definition of hope has become more nuanced, but at the same time, it is more undefined. through my current education, i have begun to see hope in two respects, religiously and agnostically. as i first read in holy cross and christian education, hope is “trusting in the cross and god’s promise of the kingdom.” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry at the university of notre dame moreau fye week twelve) in this respect, hope is relatively straightforward at first but saying is a lot easier than doing. trusting in the cross and god’s promise is one of those things for me that is very easy to do when things are going well, but at the slightest inconvenience, is tough to do. i have found that when going through tough times throughout the year, it is harder to have hope and it is not the first thing i tend to look for when going through tough times. however, i believe that it is this tough nature that makes hope so valuable in a religious context because truly trusting in the cross and god’s promise means doing so when times are at their toughest. the agonistic definition of hope i believe i have come across is that hope is a motivator. however, the degree to which it can motivate varies a lot by the person. through my experiences, i believe that some people can create hope intrinsically, but for me, i have learned that hope is extremely difficult to derive intrinsically. hope, rather, must be curated by those around you. this is not to say that i can not create hope by myself, but that it is much easier to be hopeful if those surrounding you are supportive and hopeful as well. in the same way, if you literally fall most people can get back, but it is much easier if someone is willing to offer you a hand up. lastly, one thing that has grown in importance as a result of my notre dame journey is my awareness of social issues. through classes, even in ones i did not expect like in world war ii, i learned about the importance of social change and being aware of issues that are not constantly talked about in the common discourse. for example, in moreau, i had the opportunity to look at redlining in communities. (“diversity matters!" by prof. agustin fuentes moreau fye week 11) i became aware of the current and past practices in relation to housing that has created segregation by hoursing. at first i thought this was only a problem of the city shown in the video, but after looking at the map myself, i became aware of the fact that this happens everywhere. i saw the effects in my hometown of philadelphia and its suburbs. i am almost certain that without my notre dame education, i would not have wanted to go beyond and learn more about a social issue. alberding nicholas alberding ms. kelly moreau 3/4/22 kindness always prevails i would first like to extend my gratitude to all of those who have attended today to honor the wonderful man we’ve all learned to love and appreciate, nicholas alberding. while the amount of people here is immense, it doesn’t accurately reflect the countless lives he has impacted over the course of his life. i don’t even know where to begin. i guess we can start with the type of person he was. nick was the type of person who would ask you how your day was without even knowing you. you could have been on a flight, and he would spend the entire flight talking about your life story, making you feel a sense of importance. in return, nothing, just the understanding that someone else left the conversation happier than they entered because of him. this was his inspiration in life. he wanted to make an impact on the lives of others, no matter how many. that impact could come in all shapes in sizes, as long as it occurred. the other inspiration that was apparent but not quite as important was achieving self-fulfillment for both his own goals and those of his family (inspirations of a life well lived qqc moreau fye week 2). what were his goals in life and how did he achieve them? he envisioned making a decent living in the world of business for the sole purpose of providing for his family and giving back to society. to some people, this would have been a similar goal at the start of their careers, but would soon vanish after they hit a wall, preventing them from achieving their goal. nick never hit that wall. he was always advocating that in order to find the right job, it has to match your values, interests, personality, and skills (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). he would convince us that the perfect job is out there for us, we just needed to find it. when i mentioned that nick never hit that wall, it didn’t necessarily mean that he didn’t have any obstacles. there were times when he questioned where his life was going and if he liked the path he was on. he was always asking what if’s. i remember when he asked me what if i were to play a sport in college, i would always say that probably wouldn’t happen. as it ended up, i did. for him, it was always beneficial to ask these questions because it ultimately allowed him to take a step back and make sure he was living the life he wanted to (what life am i living moreau fye week 1). the alternative questions that he would avoid would be the “why” questions. he thought it was important to use the past to reflect on his future decisions rather than having it weigh him down. asking why something happened is the wrong way to go about moving forward in life (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” moreau fye week 6). it takes a while to understand this, but having someone there to remind you of this was really special. everyone needs someone at some point in time to put them on the right track. this leaves me with my next point, relationships. nick’s relationships with everyone was unique in their own way. he thought that in order to live a life well lived, it was crucial that people eventually let down their barriers and take the time to form these relationships. he wasn’t saying that everyone you meet is someone you can share your biggest secrets with. slowly but surely, barriers have to be lowered if there are any chances of having relationships ( “why the only future worth building includes everyone” moreau fye week 7). when he was in any kind of relationship, he put the maximum amount of effort to strengthen that friendship. there were times when he would find people who wouldn’t put in the same amount of effort as he would, and those relationships eventually fell. but by the looks of how many people showed here today, most of his friendships lasted a long time. next i would like to recognize his growth over the years. when we were young, nick would argue about everything. if he didn’t believe it, it was wrong. he was so stubborn, and still is. as he got older, he worried less about everything being so concrete or absolute, and took involvement in self-reflection. i’m proud to say that he started to keep an open mind, which allowed him to hear other opinions (discernment conversation moreau fye week 5). he eventually became a good listener, to the point that all of us would go to him when we needed advice. whenever i needed anything, he would drop everything to make time for me. if he missed your phone call, he would always call you back. nick was always looking out for the best interests of others and always put them before his own. continuing on, what would nick say if he were here in front of all of us right now? he would ask everyone one simple question; are you happy? he strongly believed that in order to live a successful life, you had to be happy. while other people can form the question differently, you are the only ones that will know whether or not you are happy, not just satisfied with your lives, but truly happy (“three questions” by fr michael himes moreau fye week 3). he would continue by saying don’t just live to survive, live to live. experience life to the fullest, and don’t let other people determine where your life should take you. don’t be afraid to be your own person, and do what makes you happy. finally, i would like to ask a question about what words come to mind when you think of him. how about passionate, smart, understanding, caring, and moral. however many adjectives could be used to describe him, the most important one was his kindness. in today's society it is hard to find someone who gives you the kindness you hoped to receive at the cost of nothing. it was through this kindness and the rest of his personality that allowed him to live a fruitful life filled with joy and happiness. as he always said, kindness always prevails. father michael himes once said,“many of us live our lives as if our lives were a star in a motion picture movie in which we have the lead role—everyone else plays a supporting role (“three key questions adapted from fr. michael himes — moreau fys week three). ” indeed, it has always been easy to fall into the pithole of being self-centered and overlooking our significance of shaping others’ lives. yet, pauline had strived to live my life to the fullest by being selfless, independent and understanding. pauline was an incredible person. she was kind, full of integrity, and helped people worldwide live a life with intention. she is observant of happenings in daily life and took initiatives whenever she was able to do so. she took ordinary circumstances and turned them into something world changing. aware of the fact that “the more time [we] spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge [we] have,” pauline was not afraid to talk to her surrounding people and listen to their real thoughts and advice for her. she was always willing to learn more about herself and become a better version of herself, even though it could be difficult sometimes. (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich — moreau fys week six). people see her as an independent female who always had a clear mind of who she was, what she wanted to do, and who she aspired to be. she was not only independent in a way that she had clear goals and work ethics, but also in a way that she was comfortable being herself whenever and wherever she was. such independence has built healthy relationships with clear boundaries with people around her and created an understanding and welcoming communities in her life. (discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity — moreau fys experience week five) since she was young, pauline had always been passionate about writing, whether it be recording things happening in real life or expressing her opinions on certain topics. just as iyer states “[it’s] only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer — moreau fys week one).” always striving to understand the world and herself, pauline spent a lot of time contemplating and illustrated her beliefs and thoughts through writing and projects. pauline started an online platform at the age of 17 where she published news and opinion pieces regularly with the aim to engage with public discourse and to raise public understanding of the world. not only did she actively engage in both in-person and online discussions, but also went to a number of protests to understand the claims and the needs of different groups in society. through years of experiences of interacting with different people, she founded an organization called open box, which strives to improve the working condition of the migrant workers in taiwan. she and her colleagues directed interviews for employers of the migrant workers and migrant workers in taiwan, published policy memos, held public speeches to raise public understanding, and talked to migrant workers around taiwan on a regular basis. all of these aforementioned, were, undoubtedly, aimed to create a healthy, united, and understanding community. in addition to this, she was involved in multiple volunteering services such as tutoring at orphanages and hospitals. aspired by the alumnus who worked on promoting educational equity, pauline served as a mentor for high school students in taiwan for u.s. college applications for years and was in charge of the advisor of an non-profit organization called beyond taiwan (“domer dozen by notre dame alumni association”— moreau fys week two). throughout her life, pauline had had a kind heart of always striving to be a force of good. whenever being asked about her motivation for sacrificing free time for charitable works, she always said how she was inspired by an article by grotto where there was her favorite life motto: “...focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (five minutes by grotto — moreau fys week six). in the meantime, she continued pushing herself out of her comfort zone. as a person whose life philosophy that echos “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters,” she actively took part in different clubs especially the ones that she did not have the chance to participate back in taiwan (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center — moreau fys experience week four). “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing”: we often overlook the question of what we can leave for this society, when “death was far much less predictable, and much more seen”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham — moreau fys week three).” pauline perfectly exemplifies as a person who has always strived to contribute back to society. she was fortunate to be abundantly blessed in her life yet she had spent her entire life volunteering and donated her profits to causes worldwide. pauline might be a quiet and unsurprisingly, not the brightest person in most settings; however, “tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francais” — moreau fys week seven). she was a curious, introspective, and independent woman who always strove to understand and open up to others. regardless how difficult it might be sometimes, she never ceased to put effort in contributing to society, even those who acted unwelcoming. she had an innate knowledge of her self worth and recognized the same unlimited potential in each person she met. our dearest pauline, we will miss you and we shall continue practicing your values for the greater good for all. we will always love you and you’ll forever in our hearts. moreau integration 3 professor harrington 3/4/2022 like the day after it rains today, we have come to celebrate the life of . she was honest and abundant in kindness and found happiness and excitement in the smallest things. she loved the sound of typing, the smell of fresh steaming jasmine rice, and falling asleep in the car ride after a long day at the beach. she once told me that her favorite type of weather was the day right after it rains––when everything is covered with a dew that reflects the sunlight and when life feels incredibly lush. she wanted to be just like that to those around her. to bring joy and to amplify others’ lights was her purpose. she believed that a life well lived was to be like the day after it rains. sophia composed a list of quotes from her notre dame freshman moreau class that stuck with her through all of her years and guided her towards a life well-lived. throughout the eulogy, i will relay these quotes in connection with her story. quote one: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). sophia believed that seeing the larger picture was the first key to a life well-lived. at notre dame, she often felt the burden of being burnt out––of being in a rut with no energy to pull herself out. however, she learned that one way to cure being burnt out is to see the larger picture and to remember what she was working towards. thus, to live a life well-lived is to work with purpose and the larger picture in mind. quote two: “what made [fr. hesburgh] such an extraordinary figure was that he really didn’t belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency. he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind” (“hesburgh” moreau week two). one figure that sophia encountered at notre dame was fr. hesburgh. spending many late nights in the library named after the former notre dame president, sophia was interested to learn about the library’s namesake when watching a documentary about fr. hesburgh. the quote above especially stood out to her because she often found it frustrating how polarized notre dame and the world could be. from hesburgh, she learned that a life well lived was not one that focused on polarization but rather one that was enriched by various opinions that forged paths to “the redeemability of mankind.” quote three: “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau week three). during college, sophia had many many difficult days, just like all of us did. from being overworked to being sick to being both at the same time, she sometimes believed that the bad days overpowered the good ones. however, upon hearing the quote above, she changed her perspective. by acknowledging the bad days, she learned that they weren’t too bad after all because she got to spend time with people she loved in a place that felt like home. to embrace the ups and the downs of every day is to live a life well-lived. quote four: “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not! we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau week four). there was a period of time in sophia’s underclassmen years when the prospect of career development scared her. she was greatly afraid of rejection and felt that she should not apply to opportunities if the chance was not secured. as part of many of her classes, sophia was required to visit the career development center on campus, and she was pleasantly surprised by the activities she participated in. she saw that her experiences had a lot more value than she thought and that gave her confidence in herself and her ability to succeed. thus, to have confidence is to be happy and to live a life well-lived. in addition to the quotes taken from moreau, sophia once had an incredibly memorable conversation with her mother as a requirement for an assignment. in her conversations with others, she sought to understand herself by learning from their experiences and asking difficult questions to hear the undeniable harsh truths that she would encounter later in her life. in this discussion with her mother, sophia was told to always open her vision in order to move beyond pitfalls. her mother warned her against tunnel vision, reminding her that while it is beneficial to set goals, one should be open to spontaneity and change to minimize worries and live a good life. quote five: “so as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau week six). sophia learned that a life well lived was a life lived with gratitude. in coming to college, she was exposed to ways of life extremely different from her sometimes homogeneous hometown of pasadena. in becoming friends with others who sometimes did not have the same resources that she had growing up, she became grateful for her blessings and thus noticed with more detail the incredible life she was gifted with. quote six: “people’s paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people…mother teresa actually said: ‘one cannot love, unless it is at https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 their own expense’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven). the final point that sophia shared with me was that our motivations are our methods to a life well-lived. as an underclassman, sophia had grand ambitions: google, wall street, startups. she wanted a career that would bring her great financial gain so that she would have the freedom to be spontaneous with her time. however, she learned that at the center of this goal was herself. while it is important to prioritize oneself, she wanted to include others in this goal. thus, when pope francis quoted mother teresa, “‘one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense,’” she learned to be selfless in her career and did this through service to others. thank you everyone for coming today. i hope sophia can give you just a little guidance on how to embody a life well-lived. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript nicholas dolphin apr. 18, 2022 integration 4 my mission: the future my mission is to serve others and to be a steady rock for friends and family to lean on in times of strife. i will keep an open mind when dealing with others. i will put an emphasis on patience and listening, rather than enforcement. sometimes, listening to what others need is the best way to be of service. i will practice being patient when others are difficult to deal with, even though that is difficult for me. i will strive to broaden my knowledge, learning not only from others, but from my own mistakes. i will share this knowledge with others, such as my future family and co-workers. in doing so, i will leave my mark on the generations that come after me. i will stay true to my faith, for it has shaped me into the person that i am today. using faith not as a weapon to do harm, but as a guide to live a good life, i will lead by example. i will use what i learn at notre dame to be a force of good in the world. i will uphold the notre dame golden standard in all that i do in my work, family, and social spheres. finally, i will follow my heart for all decisions. i will not regret making difficult decisions, as these are what will move my life forward. i will stand by my choices even in the face of adversity. i will also admit when i am wrong and use these mistakes to learn for the future. the question of, “what is a life well-lived?” is difficult and deeply personal. many people cannot discern this answer until they are late into their life, but it is never too early to start thinking about such a meaningful question. my first year at notre dame has affected my mission statement profoundly already, and i know that over my next three years at notre dame, my mission statement will continue to evolve. the first part of my mission statement discusses patience. i have always struggled with this virtue, whether it be with friends from school or with my younger siblings. to live out my commitment of patience, i plan on becoming a resident assistant for my dorm when i am a senior in college. not only will this allow me to give back to the notre dame community, but it will also be a perfect opportunity for me to practice the virtue of patience. the idea of becoming an ra stuck out to me when i read the week 7 moreau course quote from pope francis. he says, “the only future worth building is one with everyone.” (“ted talk” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven). to successfully build such a community, patience is a key virtue. as an ra, to build a community with everyone in the dorm, i will have to be patient with students who may not understand the value in building a healthy living community. along with patience, my mission statement values gaining knowledge. i talk about learning from my own mistakes, which is something i find extremely valuable. a prime example of learning from my mistakes would be altering my study habits after a failed exam. many times, the first exam in a class does not go exactly how i want it to, but by being willing to change how i study, i can come back better prepared for the following exam. i can also apply learning from my mistakes to social settings as i learn how to treat others with respect always. most specifically, will not grow short with people if they are slow to understand something. i will also focus on not being so sarcastic with people that i meet, as sometimes they do not undrestand my sense of humor. by learning from my mistakes, i will grow in wisdom. i will surround myself with different views, and use my mistakes and the lessons others teach me to become a more well-rounded individual. (“how to avoid and echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week eleven.) my mission statement also highlights passing down knowledge to future generations. during my junior and senior year, i plan to become a teaching assistant in different chemistry labs to help younger students learn difficult content. being a vocal leader in a classroom setting will get me out of my comfort zone. this was practiced in the acting with courage assignment in week twelve. in the same way that i shared my story with others, i will be able to offer younger students my experiences in the lab and work with them so that they can reach their full potential. (“acting with courage” by moreau fye week twelve) along with acting with courage, being a ta in the lab also directly deals with accompaniment. while i want to help the younger students understand what they are doing, i cannot be the one to force them to learn. i have to listen to what they are struggling with, and then, with them, devise a plan of action so that they can get the most out of the lab. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenbergmoreau week nine) finally– and perhaps most importantly– my mission statement says that i will follow my heart. this may be a difficult task at times, but with practice, i will be able to do it. self-reflection will be of the utmost importance, as this is the only way that i will be able to truly hear what my heart is telling me to do. the best example of this would be my decision to go out for club swimming next year. it took many nights of silence where i was lost to realize that i was really missing the physical and mental demands of the sport that once played such a big role in my life. (“pause for reflection” by mcdonald center for wellbeingmoreau fye week 1) without reflecting on what my life was missing, i never would have come to the conclusion that i was missing swim. this journey in realizing that i needed to swim in my life started back in week three of moreau when the question, “what gives you joy?” was posed to me by father himes. (“three key questions” by father himesmoreau fye week 3) it was a difficult question, but using the self-reflection techniques that i had learned earlier, such as meditation. normally, going on walks around campus has helped me unravel difficult questions that i am wrestling with. other aspects of my life that give me joy, including spending time with my girlfriend and family, along with swimming, reminded me that i had to actively pursue these engagements to get joy. in my eulogy, i wrote about focusing on my work and family life balance. (“’s life well lived” by moreau fye week eight) while i enjoyed writing my eulogy, i believe that the mission statement and plan for action above are much more encompassing of the life that i want to live. it is interesting to see how much my goals have changed, even in half a semester at notre dame. i am excited to live out my mission statement in my college years and beyond. i know that if i stay true to my values, my eulogy will be meaningful. moreau integration how pursues a life well-lived first and foremost, my mission statement is i believe in god, and i rely on my catholic faith when guiding most of my morals and values. it is important to create a personal relationship with god because life is easier with him than without him. just because you have a good relationship with god does not mean life will not throw you some hardships, though. life is tough, and if you want something in life you have to do it yourself. create goals, have tunnel vision on those goals, and put in the work and effort to achieve them. anything is possible with proper determination and consistency. however, make sure to not be so focused on your goals that you forget to make meaningful connections with other people, especially family and friends. like the saying goes, success is not about what you know, but it is about who you know. with this said, however, do not be afraid to make enemies. be vocal about your beliefs and do not worry about what some people may think of you. you can be the best tasting peach in the world, but some people just do not like peaches. not everybody is going to like you, so just be yourself. take a stand for what is right. it is critical, now more than ever, to speak up. as an american citizen you must appreciate this great nation, while also realizing it is one nation under god. lastly, i believe that you should not be worried about being outspoken on controversial topics in fear of being “canceled.” act with courage and take a stand against what society tells you is right, even when you know it is wrong. show empathy, even though it is hard, and hate the sin, not the sinner, as my mom has told me. i have two main grand outcomes i want to achieve: 1. getting into heaven, first and foremost, and 2. saving america. i cannot do the second on my own, but i do hope to make a dent in the fight for america. make sure to be educated on politics and policy that the people you vote for will fight for. learn about their platforms and grow in wisdom by doing so. love god, love america, and love your neighbors. the first way i am pursuing a better lived life is setting screen time limits for social media and games on my phone. “all the unhappiness of men...arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). as this quote states, i find myself scrolling through tiktok and youtube for hours on end, watching pointless content. right now, people are so disconnected from each other due to technology, so we are missing out on living a true life. i believe in going outside, not being on your phone when eating, and engaging in real conversation, not just texting, with people. as my mission statement stated, i care very passionately about america and protecting it and the freedoms it ensures us. “we don’t know where we’re going from here and we don’t know what we’re going to do. but i can guarantee you there are a lot of battles yet to be one for justice. there are a lot of mountains to be climbed to overcome human ignorance, human prejudice, and at some times, human stupidity” (” hesburgh film” by father hesburgh – moreau fye week 2). this quote represents speaking out for what is right and standing your ground no matter who attacks or criticizes you. i always make sure to stay educated on political issues, and i discuss politics every single day, whether it be with friends or family, or posting on my instagram for whoever to see. i’m not scared to give my opinion on controversial issues, and that helps me live a well-lived life, not controlled by keeping my opinions to myself. in order to live a life well-lived, we must be fulfilled. however, i have struggled with searching for fulfillment. “joy – the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life. we are not talking about satisfaction either—this can detract from joy” (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau week 3). no matter how much material things i get, i always want more. i could have a million dollars and immediately look towards my next million. i firmly believe true fulfillment comes from a very close relationship with god. prayer and church are essential for forming the relationship needed to be fulfilled, although i am not great about following this advice myself, i strive to every day. everyone needs a purpose in life. finding that purpose and vocation is not crystal clear, usually. “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). as a college student, i know i have my entire life ahead of me. everything does not need to be figured out right now, as i have learned in moreau. exploring new and intriguing topics of career paths is essential to finding your purpose and proper growth and development as we depart college and enter the real world. i know i am not alone in always looking in the future, or reminiscing on the past, forgetting about the present. “so, i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by aria swarr – moreau fye week 6). how can we live a life well-lived if you are not really living in the moment? i have gotten much better at living in the moment, and to my surprise, i realized it lets you enjoy life so much more. to be happy, you must be fully invested in the now, not the later. “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the "culture of waste," which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). i do agree that culturally we need to put people first, however, as a company, your job is solely to make money. morally wrong to put money over people? yes. but business wise it is exactly what you should do. however, in this age of materialism, i do believe we as consumers need to distance ourselves from glamorizing and celebrating life based on what you own. we need to make human connections. i have been working on this, but i will admit it is mostly in my head. my actions are still that of a consumer who wants the next best thing that comes out. as i said previously, i am an ambitious person with huge goals and wants. “with respect and intelligence, humbly and without arrogance -with humble confidence or confident humility -we can be ambitious for making meaningful change” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). i firmly believe to live a life well-lived; you have to have benefitted the world for the better. by making a positive impact, your legacy will live on forever, and your future generations will appreciate it. i used to be much cockier and more arrogant with my demeanor, but i have really honed in on being humble and practicing humility. it does feel good to know you did something good, regardless of if people know it was you or not. i have really worked on accepting others and not being judgmental. “jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10).this welcoming, represented by jesus, allows love to enter the heart and enlighten your life. however, it is so hard for me not to judge people. i say i want to work on it, but i am not sure if that is true. in my hometown, especially at my high school, the students socially accepted putting down those of the lgbt community and liberals. my middle school and high school were a private catholic high school that was large majority republican. every single day i would hear “liberal” and “gay” used to insult people, so from middle school through high school i also embodied that style of judgement. i know it is wrong, but stuff that has been so embedded into my lifestyle is hard to take out of my daily life. i will say, at notre dame it is much easier to not do that because everyone hear is so much more accepting, and more sensitive and offended easier so it forces you to watch what you say. all this is to say, your community and who you surround yourself is important for molding your life and your character, so surround yourself with good people. overall, to live a life well-lived you must have a purpose, surround yourself with good people, spread positivity, love your country, and most importantly, love god and form a relationship with him. earth is temporary, and heaven is the ultimate goal. you will know you lived a life well-lived when you get into heaven. capstone integration abigail donahue 4/27/22 moreau first year experience how i got here and where i will go one major takeaway from my life experience and the lessons of moreau is that it is impossible to live a well-lived life without staying true to your beliefs. this capstone culmination was realized in the thirteenth week of the course, but i think it is important to look back at the exigence for reaching this personal mission statement: “i can use the gifts the universe has given me to make the most of my life and my relationships. i can be grateful for everything i have, acknowledge the pain i feel, and see the beauty in su�ering all at the same time. i can adapt my beliefs in accordance with wisdom and experience. i can work to enforce equity and fairness in all pursuits of my life. i will never stop learning and i will treat everyone with respect and humility. i can get through everything life throws at me with grace and willpower. i will be calm under pressure and in the face of adversity. i will choose hope and optimism every morning, and treat my loved ones with loyalty and compassion. i will chase my dreams, but make important life choices with responsibility and maturity. i will live in the moment instead of the past or future. i will put my whole heart into everything i do and cut out the areas of my life that do not bring joy. i can make mistakes and still love myself. i can have bad days and not take it out on others. i can take care of myself physically without making it an obsession.” (personal mission statement moreau week 13) i believe that every person is the product of their experiences, myself included. because of this, it is crucial for me to understand why i follow the philosophies i do through acknowledging where i come from. there are many important foundations in my life that date back to my childhood. one of the most integral pillars of who i am is that i am my mother’s daughter. family was always an important and reliable part of my life. ever since i was a child, i strongly utilized the advice of my mom when making di�cult life decisions, such as academic and career discernment. my mom knows me better than anyone else, and encourages me to chase what makes me ful�lled and happy. (moreau week five) i am also able to be the most vulnerable and authentic around her parents and younger brother, as ted. as fr. greg boyle said in tattoos on the heart: “somewhere, in the jurisdictional locale where judgment used to claim us, a remarkable commonality rushes in, and the barriers that exclude us are dismantled.” (tatoos on the heart by father greg boyle moreau week seven). since eighth grade, i’ve always known that i want a stable and traditional career path. in middle school spanish class, when my teacher asked the students to go around the room and say what they wanted to be when they grew up, i answered with feliz. for me, the end goal has always been to be happy and satis�ed with my life. this seems intuitive, but oftentimes people become caught up in the clout or reputation of their prospective �elds, rather than if it makes them happy. although many of my peers hate o�ce jobs or more “traditional” work settings, i always knew that this atmosphere would be a productive and sustainable place for her to work. my dad, ryan, has been an airline pilot his https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/523771/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/523771/download?download_frd=1 whole life, and while he loves being able to �y and travel, i’ve always hated the irregularity of his schedule. “everything you’ve done to this point, as well as all the interactions you’ve had with others, have already started shaping your vips.” (navigating your career journey, meruelo center moreau week four) my experience growing up in a household with a parent with an untraditional workplace has made me appreciate traditional career paths. although i know my end goal is a traditional, stable career; when i �rst came to college, i had no idea what i wanted to major in. i am so interested in so many disciplines that it seemed impossible to pick just one to spend a career on. when i heard about pls, i knew it would be a perfect �t for me. i believe wisdom is found in multidisciplinary knowledge and attacking ideas from multiple angles of thought. pls provides the perfect place for this as it encourages students to study great books, scienti�c inquiry, theology, philosophy, and music. although the pls major is small, the opinions of myself and my peers are large. our relationships are amazing, but the discussions are fraught with dissonance and healthy debate. i think �nding this community was a way of absolving the “echo chamber” mentioned by dr. blaschko in this week’s video. (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau week 11) political, theoretical, and moral discourse can be hard and mentally strenuous, but it is so worthwhile. hearing di�erent sides of an argument and reconciling your ideas with another's is a true method of becoming wise. “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in con�ict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite e�ect.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau week six) i believe challenging my point of views and �nding ful�llment in my studies is critical to pursuing a life well-lived in college. one pursuit that has greatly increased my sense of ful�llment in life is veganism. i believe wholeheartedly that all living beings are connected through the lifeworld and deserving of reverence. my favorite hours are spent walking through the woods with a good friend or classical playlist. i liked to sit under the trees at night and thank the universe for giving her these beautiful moments. nowadays, it is hard to forgo the convenient world of artifacts for the natural outdoor lifeworld, but , as father hesburgh once said, “we all ought to be protesting against many of the things we see in modern life.”(hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau week two). this resolution to enjoy sitting still in nature instead of surrounding myself with the intrusive buzzing of screens re�ected the quote “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau week one). although many people share this appreciation for the connectedness of the life world, i think few people are willing to sacri�ce things to acknowledge it. giving up meat two years ago was one of the best moments in my personal development. “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau week 10) for me, this spirit of inclusion extends to all living things, including animals. “each one of us can choose to �nally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” (dean g. marcus cole moreau week 12) by taking actions that are in accordance with my personal values, i believe i am pursuing a life-well lived. another key factor to living a life well-lived, and to being human, is being human with other humans. we are naturally social creatures, so socializing with others and sharing ideas and thoughts is https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ essential to living our lives. however, in order to fully live in these values our humanity must be shared even in di�cult times. throughout the past few years, learning to live with the pandemic and with mentally ill loved ones, i have felt a strong connection to many of the themes of accompaniment. one instance that comes to mind was a walk i took with one of my high school friends over the summer. she struggles with a severe eating disorder, and it has been a challenge to stay supporting her when there is so little i can do to help. on this walk, she was sharing with me the terrible side e�ects she was experiencing. at �rst, i tried to o�er solutions and tips. however, i quickly realized that what she really needed in the moment was someone to just listen and hold her hand. i shifted my focus from o�ering up my inexperienced, patchwork-like tips, and instead to being like a support pillar for her. this instance reminded me of this quote from the text: “it is a practice. by being aware of what you’re trying to do, engaging in it, re�ecting on experiences of it -both accompanying and being accompanied -you get better.” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by professor steve reifenberg moreau week nine) i think it’s hard to combat feelings of powerlessness when all you can do to help someone is stay by their side. this text made me feel a lot better about this practice and its e�ectiveness. although stories like this are tragic and horrible, accompanying each other through struggles is what makes us living. “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we �nd light in them.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau week three) just as you cannot know what day is without having experienced night, you can’t know a meaningful life without a meaningful loss. pursuing a life well-lived is a hefty, nuisance objective. by understanding the roots of my personal beliefs, acting in accordance with them, and acknowledging humanity in the face of adversity, i believe i am living the life i was intended to live. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html eulogy(monroe professor kelly march 4, 2022 sp22-fys-10102-107 moreau first year experience win the day for j. hello everyone my name is , i am the reflection of the man we lost just last week. as we sit here today, not in grief, but as a celebration of the man jmick was. he was a resilient, passionate, selfless old man(week 1 qqc. if you ever talked to jmick, one thing you should know is he is tremendously competitive(week 4 qqc). no matter what the situation was, he wanted to be the best. one time he and i were sitting on the porch and he looked at me and said, ”i bet you 20 dollars i can get more girl’s numbers than you.” i couldn’t pass up on this challenge. i ended up losing 20 dollars. you hear some of the best athletes ever talk about quote how hard you must work if you want to make it to the top. one time jmick’s dad told us,” your sport or job must be an obsession if you want to be the best at it.” of course, it was a little exaggeration, but not for jmick. with that being said, i always made sure there was a balance between overworking and outworking. you can outwork somebody but still find time in the day to relax and make sure your mind is right. when it comes to your mind and body, you are going to need recovery and rest to put out the best work. jmick did everything he did for god and his parents(week 7 qqc). we used to have conversations about why we play football and try to get good grades. he would tell me, “man i have to make them proud.” he went as hard as he could all the time so that he can know god and his parents were proud of the man he had become. there are tons of people asking themselves,” what am i here for?”(week 3 qqc) well, he knew. many outsiders can see jmick as cocky or overconfident, which he could be at times. but for how i knew him, he was just on a mission. a mission to fulfill god’s will. believing he mickey 2 could change the world one step at a time. he believed he was on this earth to simply make the world a better place. if you didn’t know, jmick practiced christianity. he believed if you have faith, try to obey, and love god, he will guide you the right way. when he was 16, his mom was diagnosed with colon cancer. he came to practice that night and told me, i figured i had to be strong for him, talk him through it, let him know it was alright. but i didn’t have to because he already knew. he always knew the right questions to ask himself. instead of asking,” why.” he would ask himself, “what can i do to be better?”(week 6 qqc) often times people mistake him for is being afraid to express his emotions, and we had this conversation. he told me why would i be sad when i know god is going to take care of it. it was hard to put in perspective that a 16-year-old kid wasn’t devastated about his mom, possibly being on the edge. he knew she was going to be alright, and sure enough, his mom continued to live a long healthy life. the stories like this, i think represent jmick the best. he was straightforward and a believer in christ, and with that alone, he thought he could conquer the world. one goal jaden shared with me was to be remembered and leave a legacy. a life well-lived is doing the right thing and inspiring the people around you to do the right thing(week 2 qqc). the definition of success is very broad. one thing that i know determines greatness is legacy. he won the waltor payton man of the year award for a reason. the day he was drafted and signed his contract he gave me a call. on the phone, i told him how proud of him i was and we talked about how long he has been waiting for this day. he told me he wanted to donate to every charity in his city! i sat back and was amazed by that statement. on the biggest day of his life, he was already thinking about how he can give back to the community. my idea of a life mickey 3 well-lived is making the world a better place while being a good person, and that’s what jaden mickey represented. jmick was never a man that turned away criticism. sometimes he could give off bad impressions on people. a lot of people may say he’s annoying and other people would say he’s calm. most of the time, he understood the time and place for everything. one time he had a reflection assignment and he asked me to have a conversation with him, about himself(week 5 qqc). one of the questions was, “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” i told him, “your ego distracts you from your core values.” as one of his closest friends, i’ve heard him try to defend his name plenty of times. as we got older, he began to stop. whenever he got made fun of, instead of reciprocating the act, he just turned the other cheek. now, this was a big step for him because as a kid, he would never be able to put his pride to the side. the moral of the story is, he took the criticism on the chin. it didn’t affect our friendship, it just made him a better man at the end of the day. as i close out my eulogy, i want you guys to remember, this is a celebration of life. a life that focused on serving other. he wouldn’t want you to be devastated over his death. he died an old man. i will leave you with this, live each day remembering it could be your last. be resilient, compete, smile, and win the day! moreau capstone paper moreau fye 29 april 2022 lost in the woods probably an unpopular opinion, but i am extremely grateful for the period of quarantine that covid brought us. as someone who was living go-go-go, staying up late each night, getting up early each morning, studying for test after test, and being drained practice after practice, i was so thankful for some time to step back and gather myself. when i look back on my junior year self, i genuinely don’t know how i would have finished the school year. would i have lost it and failed my classes? would i have managed to pull through at the expense of my mental health? i don’t know, and frankly i don’t want to know. with the constant go-go-go mentality i had in high school, i felt like i never had time to explore what i liked, reflect on how i wanted to live my life, or think about who i wanted to be. quarantine gave me time to reflect on myself and my personal mission. i made big steps during quarantine in areas like self-confidence, happiness, and mental health. i was working out, i was eating better, i wasn’t constantly faced with the stress of grades, i was getting a lot more sleep, and i was spending more time doing what i wanted to do—i dabbled in art projects, i was able to read, and i actually had time to watch shows on netflix. covid took a lot away from us, but i also think that in a way, it gave us a lot too. my senior year and my first semester of college were some of the happiest months in my life. i know that this happiness is a result of the reflection i had the time to do in quarantine. i felt like i actually knew myself—i knew what i wanted, i knew who i wanted to be, what i wanted to do, which friends made me happy, etc. knowing all of that gives you confidence and purpose, and that makes getting through life a whole lot easier. when i came back this year for second semester, i feel like i stepped off the path i had found for myself, and i haven’t been able to find my way back. the path that led me to a life well lived seems a bit far away, hidden in shrubs and behind a cloud of fog. this semester has been really hard, but i’m confident that i can find the path again. i’ve found it once, and i can do it again. to live a life well lived, i’ve devised four steps based on my previous experiences. they include: reflection, time with friends and family, trying new things, and supporting others. 1. reflection something i started this year was journaling. the journal i use, the 5 minute journal, asks the same questions every day. some of the questions are to be answered in the morning and some are to be answered at night. an example of a morning question would be: “what would make today great?” an example of an evening question would be: “what did you learn today?” i think that these questions help me to live my life how sister aletheia would want me to. it allows me a little memento mori each day. “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” said becky clements” (“the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). each morning, i think about the clean slate i have https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html ahead of me, and what i want to try to achieve with it. putting it in writing helps me visualize it better and makes it seem more achievable. then at night, i can reflect on what i did well and what i would like to do better tomorrow. it gives me a little direction in life which i find to be really nice. i also find that journaling serves as a form of meditation. as pico iyer explains in his article, “why we need to slow down our lives,” “such developments [mental health programs] are saving american corporations three hundred billion dollars a year; more important, they’re a form of preemptive medicine at a time when the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating that ‘stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as someone who is easily stressed, i do find that reflecting and journaling is helpful when it comes to my mental health. i’m someone who likes purpose and to-do lists and monitoring progress, and i’ve found that journaling allows me to do all of that. it helps me feel like i have some control in my life. through this written reflection, i’ve been able to determine what my personal mission is: to spread love and encouragement (“writing a personal mission statement activity” moreau fye week thirteen). i know this isn’t the classic “i’m going to do this career” or “i’m going to volunteer and give back to the poor,” but i genuinely believe that this is my mission and one of my strengths. i’m good at having an open mind, listening to others, and helping others see their potential when they might be struggling to. another area of reflection in my life has been my major (as i’m sure it is with every college student). i know that i like biology, but i don’t particularly like physics or chemistry. i love biology, but is it worth it if half of the classes i have to take as a student in the college of science are so terrible? i also know that i don’t want to be premed because i cannot take another admissions process or deal with the stress that comes with med school, but what am i going to do with a biology degree? the other obvious choice would be research, but that’s not super appealing to me either. sometimes it’s hard for me to remember but, “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience” by the center for career development moreau fye week four). this reassurance from the ccd has prompted me to go through with biology and hope that the right job finds me. if i’m sticking to a subject i love, then there’s got to be some sort of career that excites me within the field. i’m thankful for the answers reflection has allowed me to find, and i hope that by continuing to think about these questions, i will be able to find the right career path for me. maybe i feel like i’ve lost sight of my path, but reflection has helped me to walk back in the direction of it, and i think that if i continue to reflect, i can find that happiness that is connected to a life well lived. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ 2. time with friends and family i have always been someone who has leaned heavily on their friends and family. i need a support system, and even if i don’t want to talk about life’s stressors, just knowing that there are people looking out for me and there for me when i need, helps minimize my stress. i’ve known for a while that my greatest fear is to be alone—no one to help me through hard times or no one to encourage me when i need it. spending time with friends and family helps me to be the best version of myself, and the one that is best able to carry out my personal mission of spreading love and encouraging others. in the discernment conversation i had with my mom earlier this semester, she said that i most value my friends and family (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). based on what i explained above, this did not surprise me at all. i know that friends and family have always been super important to me, but i believe that the key here is to spend time with real friends and supportive family. when i think of what this means, i think back to reifenberg’s essay, “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). in accompaniment, you don’t try to solve the other person’s problems for them. you work as a team, taking on all obstacles together and listening to one another. the best friends and family do this too. in high school, whenever i was stressed, my friends didn’t say “well, just stop stressing so much. it’s not that big of a deal.” they would hug me, and tell me that it’s going to be ok. we would help each other with homework and explain concepts to one another. i hope to take from these experiences, and use what made me feel better to help others feel better as well. as i mentioned before, i feel that one of my strengths is being non judgemental towards others. i think that this mind set is really important in order to carry out my mission statement as you can’t encourage and love others without trying to understand them first. “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgements, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (tattoos for the heart by father gregory joseph boyle moreau fye week seven). i’m constantly anxious about how people judge me, and i’m sure others feel the same way too. if we learn to be less judgemental, we can open up new opportunities for love and acceptance. as boyle explains, this allows for more meaningful relationships and is something i want to prioritize in my life. my relationships with my friends and family have shown me what true love and encouragement look like, and they will help me carry out my personal mission statement. 3. trying new things another way to help myself live my best life is to try new things. i’m someone who likes routine, and is often scared to try anything new. in order to find others to support and encourage https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955#:~:text=download%20_tattoos%20on%20the%20heart_%20%2d%20chapter%208_%20jurisdiction%20(1).pdf and to form new and meaningful relationships in life, i need to be open to trying new things. in the documentary we watched about father hesburgh, we learned that, “he did a lot of things that people would have thought as not particularly priestly, he was entrepreneurial” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). hesburgh is a man i strive to be like, therefore, i need to be willing to step outside my comfort zone and try a few new things—things i might not necessarily see myself doing. this year, i tried ultimate frisbee and writing for scholastic, a student publication, for the first time. i really love both of these clubs, and i wouldn’t have joined them if i didn’t put myself out there. i’m not the most athletic person i know, and i’m not the best writer i know either. nevertheless, i tried both of these clubs anyway, and i am so happy that i did. as a result i’ve made progress towards achieving my mission: i’ve made stronger friendships and found something that gives me joy. on the subject of trying new things, i think back to eurich’s article “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way).” in it he says, “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential. why questions stir up negative emotions; what questions keep us curious. why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). for example, what do i want to accomplish and what am i going to do to get there incites progress more than why haven’t i accomplished that yet? using “what” to frame your questions provokes you to respond with actions and allows you to start acting towards the goal you have in mind. these types of questions can help me get out of my own head and start being productive. 4. supporting others while the other three categories have had an element of improving myself so that i’m in the best place to carry out my mission, this section solely focuses on my goal: to love and support others. i know that i am privileged in many ways. i grew up in a caring family, in a safe town, financially secure, and with all of the support i could ask for. i did not have to worry about racism or discrimination. i know that with all of this privilege comes the responsibility to do good and enact change, and i have been trying to do that. like dean g marcus wrote, “except, i can breathe. and i can do something. i must do something” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.’” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i have the room to breathe. therefore, i need to utilize this advantage and do something with it. one way that i have always tried to do this (and will continue to) is by being very open minded. being open minded allows me to connect with everyone and listen to diverse perspectives. it helps prevent the creation of echo chambers, or conversations in which everyone has the same experiences and agrees with one another, echoing an idea, creating the illusion that it’s a strong one even when it's not. “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr blaschko moreau fye week eleven). we can combat this by being open minded, listening to new perspectives, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd and not always assuming that we’re right. i can continue to work on this by attending events and lectures at notre dame that touch on beliefs, experiences, and outlooks on life that are different from my own. understanding that there is more than one way to live a good life will help me to be the most supportive, loving, and encouraging person i can be. along with this mentality, i need to be ok with being wrong. d’angelo writes, “the good/bad binary is the fundamental misunderstanding driving white defensiveness about being connected to racism” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by d’angelo moreau fye week ten). learning from others and from our mistakes is how we grow. it’s ok to make them, as long as we learn our lesson and then change our habits. instead of getting defensive or trying to justify my way of thinking, i need to be open to learning. i believe that through reflection, time with family and friends, trying new things, and supporting others, i can become the best version of myself. by embracing these four areas of my life, i can grow into someone who can be supportive and encouraging to others, helping my friends and family and everyone i can to reach their full potential and a life well lived. this semester i’ve felt myself stray from my path—i have no idea what i’m doing—but i hope that these steps will help me find my way out of the woods. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit week 8integration three professor hnatusko moreau fye 4 march 2022 everywhere you go, there’s always people carson daniel feldman. all of you know him, but you may not know each other. all of you reading this are likely from a different walk of carson’s life. that is because carson was a maverick of sorts. a drifter, by circumstance and by choice. with a family in the military he grew up moving from place to place, spending his formative years outside the big apple of new york city, in the southern comfort of dallas texas, and back east to the city of brotherly love in philadelphia. he learned to adapt. with each change, carson changed; he met new people, tried new foods, got involved in different sports and groups and most importantly, used the positive learning experiences he had to build his character. he made countless connections and tried to always make people feel important just for being themselves. the transition to south bend indiana, was just another move for carson. at least he thought. upon arriving at notre dame, he assumed this would be just like every other move. but for some reason he struggled. a lack of confidence held him back from making new friends, joining new groups and acting the way he normally acted. he was always a dedicated student and that carried on as he achieved high marks his first semester, but it was not nearly as fulfilling. at this time in his life, he felt empty. however, carson discovered something in his second semester that changed his life and can change all of ours. remembering all the experiences he had of breaking into new environments, carson made the brave decision to go to a super bowl party with his roommate. little did he know that this party would open a new life at notre dame. this small action introduced carson to a new group of incredible friends, people that he felt comfortable with and that he could learn from. he baked with his friends, went on walks, listened to music, and had deep, meaningful conversations. he found that what made him happiest was seeing other people smile. as he grew in confidence he began to branch out in different ways. becoming more active at church and in his dorm, getting involved on sports teams and introducing himself to unfamiliar faces. he discovered that while he was at notre dame for an education, he still had a life to live, and to live a fulfilling life involved offering the best of himself everywhere, all the time. carson’s transition centers around a two fold change. first a discovery (or rediscovery) of himself. as part of an introductory college course, carson was tasked with having a meaningful discernment conversation. he chose his mom, because she knows him best. they talked about life and personalities, the positives and negatives, and more importantly how we appreciate the positives and move forward from the negatives to become the person we want to become. carson is remembered by saying “there are two parts about the future, my circumstances (lifestyle, job, location) and me, and knowing the latter is the best way to prepare for the former” (moreau fye week five). carson was an introvert at heart and was very introspective but he channeled that introspection into self improvement, not just in how he could be happier but how he could change to be a person that made others happier. he fully believed that “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players… and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurech moreau fye week six) in speaking with his mom, reflecting on his past experiences, and thinking about how he could serve others carson started a sunday tradition. carson loved desert, and growing up his family had a desert every sunday night. to carry on the tradition and to brighten the spirits of those around his dorm carson began baking every sunday night and leaving the desert on the sorin community table. seeing the smiling faces of his new “family” lifted his heart and helped him feel validated in his traditions. father michael himes, advises that “we have to be willing to hear what others need and to give ourselves in response even when our attempt to respond may not be appreciated.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). carson exemplified https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 the principle of courage defined by fr. michael himes. whether it was that friends were struggling with midterms or the dorm just needed a boost, he offered his response of homemade brownies without expectation of praise but simply for the good of others. carson knew that you could only discover so much about yourself by baking alone on a sunday night. he put into practice the words offered by notre dame faculty advising that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). this fueled his confidence to go to the super bowl party, where he met friends that changed the rest of his semester. with his friends he had meaningful conversations, discussing things that were important to him and to them such as faith, family, and even simple things such as “if you were a type of cereal, which would you be?” he loved his friends deeply and they reciprocated the emotion. oftentimes they would share how when talking with carson they felt appreciated, little did they know that really they were doing a favor for him. these connections helped carson see the best in himself, including what he valued most, and showed him how he could share those things to bring joy to others. when carson began spending more time with this group he noticed other changes in his life. the monotonous life of schoolwork was now broken up by a lively dinner full of laughs and good music. the kitchen he baked in on sunday nights was now full of new friends to help and to share the treats with. as the other aspects of his life became more balanced, so did his education. no matter what, carson was always present. when he needed to do homework he did so, knowing that there would be things later to look forward to. when he was with his friends he enjoyed the time, knowing that it was a short break and would help him with the strength he needed to finish the work for the rest of the day. in this way, carson’s example resembled the experience of pico iyer when he says “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). living a more fulfilling life overall, helped carson regain some perspective regarding https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ education and his focus began shifting forward. he was able to be dedicated to his studies and excited about what career they could offer in the future knowing that he felt comfortable in his surroundings at the moment. carson prioritized people. he sought to serve others however he could while learning and growing from what they had to offer. this was evidenced as he became closer with his friends and with his dorm, but ultimately carson knew that he was capable of doing more, empowering his deep dive into career discernment. with a people first mindset carson wanted to reach as many people as possible with whatever work he did. he took things into his own hands to make this happen, challenging himself with difficult classes and taking a variety to see which stuck out to him. he had passion in engineering and saw the application of its problem solving nature to the benefit of the human race. carson followed the example of adebola giwa who said “as a physician i am able to help my community, but as a scientist i am able to help the world.” (domer dozen 2019 honoree dr. adebola giwa moreau fye week two). carson sought this balance in his day to day life, offering service and friendship to those around him in the community while taking school seriously to prepare himself to serve the world one day. school, faith, family, sports, and many more things were important to carson but they did not represent life to him. what gave carson life was people. in every where he lived, what turned a place into a home was the people he connected with. he learned this at a young age and made it a part of his character to be a bearer of light and love for those around him. father greg boyle s.j. in his book tattoos on the heart expresses that “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle s.j. moreau week seven) carson showed us that when we feel lost or feel like we are falling, we can find purpose by realigning our focus beginning inward and extending outward. carson will forever be remembered as someone who led a life that brought him joy by bringing others joy. in the words of his favorite quote by j.m. barrie, “those who bring sunshine to the lives of others cannot keep it from themselves.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6rrn98f_e0 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/523771?module_item_id=167900 moreau integration luzmariaelena flores moreau integration 03/02/22 who am i? do i live with convections? my name is luzmariaelena flores and i am 18 years old. i am a daughter of 2 immigrant parents and i have a little sister. i am a first year freshman in notre dame majoring in neuroscience and behavior. i identify myself as female and catholic. i live in a low income household and have attended public schools all my life. i have a dream to become a physician assistant. these are all things that identify me. however, they do not tell me what convections i live with. with the start of this moreau lesson, i struggled to think what convictions i have that are not a part of the treadmill. i confused my convections with what job i wanted or how i wanted things to go during my school years. during week 5 of moreau, we watched a sparknote of mary shelley's novel, frankenstein. i automatically connected convections with a cause and concern. (mary shelley, 1818) my cause and concern was crispr. crispr is fairly new in the scientific community. crispr has been found to be useful in gene-editing. crispr's basic function is to cut out a specific piece of dna which it has been programmed to delete. after this happens, the dna can naturally repair and continue as if nothing happened. crispr can help in lots of medical breakthroughs since they can change a person's dna in order to help them with genetic diseases. at first, i thought this is my convection. this was something that i was worried about and wanted to change. crispr is a topic i want to be more careful with, but this did not tie in on how i wanted my life to go. i then began to focus on how to make a true reflection of my life. tasha eurcih explained that reflection is not just thinking of what you did or what you could change, but what happened to lead to that moment. at times, i felt doing a reflection was useless. every time i reflected i fell into a spiral of my own thoughts that never led me to anything. eurcih put my thoughts into words. “in other words, we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” “self-reflection doesn’t necessarily help people become more self-aware.” (tasha eurich, 2017) researchers found out that when people were asked to self-reflect it didn't cause an individual to find some insight about themselves. the people ended up the same as they were before they self reflected. this result they found was able to lead to a way to better self-reflect in terms of “what” instead of terms in “why.” as stated previously, i always found it difficult to find something new about myself and this proved that i was doing reflection wrong. i started to reflect on my beliefs and what i truly wanted to get out of my life. all i thought was about internal and external happiness, friendship, love, and faith. i realized that i have not been as active as i wanted to be with my faith. i wanted to more clearly embody my religion in more than just attending mass. i think that i’m on a path where i can gain the most of myself. as time passed by, i also realized that i have not been in tune with my internal happiness. i kept on comparing my academics and my skills to those that were my friends. i felt constant pressure to keep up and do more. deresiewicz’s quote “true leadership means being able to think for yourself and act on your convictions.” (deresiewicz, 2010) i had begun to no longer be a leader. leadership at first meant success. it meant to be able to know everything and get everything correctly. i had grown accustomed to relating to the smartest person in my class as a class leader in high school. before reading this article, i would have thought that leadership and success were the same. but now, i understand that leadership is being able to be alone and still feel accomplished and happy with oneself. leadership involves self reflection and multiple point views, not just one. after self reflection, i realized that i was being swayed by the actions of others and could no longer think about what i wanted or what convictions i followed. i had stressed myself with the amount of classes i had in order to follow my friends. after doing a lot of self reflection and spending time with my thoughts, i decided to drop a class. after dropping my class, i felt relieved and happy to have dropped something that had been bothering me mentally. i finally felt that i could breath and slow down to a pace where i felt accomplished and not feel like i am failing behind everyone else. pope francis also wants us to act on our conventions and express memory, creativity, and courage. (pope francis, 2017) i was able to embody courage in my decisions and act upon them. however, i am still struggling to embody all of them in my process to act upon my convections. furthermore, i knew that in order to find a way to embody my convections i didn’t have to figure all of it out on my own. i knew that i had mentors that had been with me since highschool and people that i could rely on to trust. in my fourth week of moreau, i learned about good academic mentors and life mentors. daloz parks explained mentors to be the people that can view me as a young adult and help me develop my own indepence without pushing me too far. (sharon daloz parks, 2000) they are the ones i can talk to and trust their opinion. these people are not parents who raised us and love us; they are people that have seen us grow and sees us as another adult to be. i knew that if i spoke to my mentors i would be able to learn how to embody my convections into my decisions i make. talking to my mentor and advisors helped me understand what i was struggling and what i could do to change. i learned that i forced myself to change to the conventions of others and forget my own. they helped me recognize that the pace i follow should only be mine and that others should follow theirs. overall, in my second semester of notre dame i have been able to learn more about myself. i learned about what convection is and what my convictions are. i now know how i can use self reflection and independence in order to reinforce my convictions. i can also now act upon my convections with memory, creativity, and courage. 3-1-22 moreau fye live like you are dying “being remembered is easy. being remembered for something good, now that’s exceptional.” this quote by philip gutirerrez truly encapsulates the difficulty of lifehow can i live a good life while i am still here? how can i be a person that leaves a positive legacy for others? how can i, at the end of my life, know that i lived my life well? often, when someone is too close to something, it is difficult for them to understand it in its entirety. the same can be said for life. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives”, week 1) as i now close in on the final chapter of my life, i finally have the chance to see everything i have done, to see it all together, and examine the image i have created with my actions. with a lot of hard work, and a little luck, i hope the picture is a beautiful one. i hope that i lived a life full of joy. joy itself is “the sense of rightness in the way in which one is living one’s life.” (fr. michael himes, three key questions, week 3) joy, unlike other fleeting emotions like happiness and anger, is enduring. i hope that my life always had an underlying aura of joy, surrounding everything i did. joy comes from pursuing a vocation you are passionate about, from developing deep interpersonal relationships, and sometimes even from simple activities, such as reading or, in my case, playing music. as my life draws to a close, i hope to look back upon every moment, and see the joy underneath it all, even during the moments of pain and anger. i want to have given enough time to the things i enjoymusic, art, sports, exploring. i want to have squeezed every ounce of joy out of every choice i made, even the bad ones and the ones i regret. i hope that i lived a life that impacted others positively. father hesburgh, the beloved former president of notre dame, once stated that he believed everything he achieved, all the legacies he left behind did not exist because he tried to leave them. instead he said “a lot of this is the power of friendship.” (fr. hesburgh, hesburgh, week 2) in my life, i hope that the friendships i developed will act as a canvas of my legacy once i am gone. i do not want to sit here, looking back on my actions wondering “why” i did what i did. instead, i want to know “what” made my actions impactful. even at the end of my life, i do not wish to dwell in past ‘maybe ifs.’ “‘why’ questions trap us in our past. ‘what’ questions help us create a better future.” (eurich, “the right way to be introspective”, week 6) i hope that my actions were driven by kindness, compassion, empathy, and love. i hope that i worked tirelessly to achieve equality for all in this world, which is something i have always been deeply passionate about. (week 5) i hope that everything i did was for the good of others. i know, deep down, that it is impossible, that i, like all others, am inherently selfish. however, i hope that, at least a few times, i was able to overcome my selfish desires and fully give myself away. i hope that type of self-sacrifice bookmarked my life. a life well lived is one that has an impact that endures even after one is gone. imagine a beloved novel, one that has been carried nearly everywhere. the cover may be falling off, the pages may be torn, the edges frayed, and the binding weak. there may be tear and coffee stains, and smudged pencil marks sprawled across the pages. these imperfections do not make the book worth any less. in fact, they make the book more valuable, more impactful. the same can be said about life. a life well lived is often one that is also marred by imperfection, by bruises, cuts, scrapes, and in my case, several scars. these marks can come from anywhere and everywhere. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (navigating your career journey, week 4) however, it is these blemishes that mark a life as having been lived, and lived to the fullest and best it could be. i hope that when i am gone, my life looks as if it has been through hell and back. at least then i know that i lived to the best of my ability. sometimes my best is not quite enough, but it is always worth more than nothing. when i am gone, i want to leave behind a world of love, tolerance, and equality. i want to inspire all those who follow me to stand up, to make a change, and to go for their dreams.“but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us.’” (pope francis, “why the only future worth building includes everyone”, week 7) in order to create a better world, people must act. if my actions can inspire at least one other person to improve the world in the best way they know how, then i have lived my life, and i have lived it well. as the character of george washington sings in the iconic musical hamilton, “dying is easy, young man. living is harder.” as i reach the end of my life, i am approaching the easiest part of my journeydying. what was difficult is everything i had to do until nowall of the choices i had to make, the sacrifices i had to suffer through, the trials and tribulations, the ups and the downs. no one ever said that living a good life was easy. but in the end, it is completely worth it. capstone integration: a year in review harringon moreau 29 april 2022 the question of the semester: how do i pursue a life well-lived? throughout the semester we have read different articles to help us figure out what a life well-lived looks for us, and how to achieve it. below is my integration of the semester: a year in review. i don’t enjoy planning for my future i am a person that definitely lives in the moment. i don’t enjoy making plans for the upcoming weeks, let alone years in advance. it is stressful and gives me the pressure to make a perfect decision so that i am not in trouble years down the road for a choice my 18-year-old self made. this is why thinking about living a life well-lived is another stressful topic. during week 4 from this semester of moreau we focused possible ways one could have a life well-lived. within this, i focused on careers that allow for people to apply a holistic version of themselves: “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall.” i myself am planning on continuing as a mechanical engineering major, and i believe this will allow me to discover new areas of life in which i can explore new ways of applying myself. however, my life doesn’t necessarily need to revolve around my career (though it will be a big part of it). this is why i particularly enjoyed week 1. we practiced self-reflection. not looking forward to the future and planning out our next moves, but being present in the moment and thinking about what and where we are doing in our lives: “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger.” we talked about how technology is ever-present, which makes the stress of planning future things always there. but taking a moment to self-reflect – taking a moment to turn everything else off and live in the moment – is a good way to better one’s mental health. however, we also focused on personal obstacles for a life well-lived in week 6, one of which was dwelling on self-reflection for too long: “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” one must find a perfect balance so that they are not just focusing on the future, but they are also not exclusively focusing on the past. it’s a healthy medium of growth from past experiences and planning for future ones. making change in the world in week 7 we focused on which relationships are characteristic of a life well-lived and how certain important relationships can be instrumental in persevering through tough times: “we have so much to do, and we must do it together. but how can we do that with all the evil we breathe every day?” people are a collaborative species, and they work together against the evil of the world every day. however, one of these evils is the fact that people are unwilling to change their minds when it comes to topics they are passionate about: “we travel as seekers after answers we cannot find at home, and soon find that a change of climate is easier than a change of heart” (week 2). this is why, in my future, i want to focus on changing the climate around us (with the help of my peers). changing our environment will contribute to changing people’s hearts, which will help our society as a whole. one problem that we should work to deal with is the unconscious racism that is present not only in our every-day lives, but in our media as well: “our centrality in history textbooks, historical representations and perspectives; our centrality in media and advertising; our teachers, role-models, heroes and heroines; everyday discourse on “good” neighborhoods and schools and who is in them; popular tv shows centered around friendship circles that are all white; religious iconography that depicts god, adam and eve, and other key figures as white. while one may explicitly reject the notion that one is inherently better than another, one cannot avoid internalizing the message of white superiority, as it is ubiquitous in mainstream culture” (week 10). this is not necessarily the only problem with race in our media. one that i have noticed recently, and one that i would like to focus on fixing (with the help of my peers) is the fact that it is a big deal to all of us when a person of a minority race does something normal, like win an award or star as the main character of a movie. though i think it’s great, i also think it should not be a big deal. instead it should be normalized so that we can make all races equal, none are special. this is one of the many changes i want to see in the world, and i will work hard to achieve it. helping others for week 5 i called my mom about where i am in my life right now what i want to do with the tools i have been given up until this point. we both agreed that though i am in school for mechanical engineering, that is not what my main purpose in life is. we talked about for as long as i can remember i’ve been trying to help people with what i am given. in third grade i worked with my friend to start a fundraiser selling bookmarks. we raised six-hundred dollars selling twenty-five-cent bookmarks to students in our classmates. we donated the money to contribute to well-building for our sister school in haiti. this, however, was just my introduction to serving others. as i grew older, i took a more hands-on approach to service: “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (week 12). walking with the people that you are helping (walking side by side with all people as disciples of jesus) is a good form of accompaniment, which is what we focused on in week 9. the story that we read was about steve, who planned on helping those in need and actually got help from them: “i still didn’t have the precise language to describe what i learned in chile. over the past few years, i have come to realize that the word is accompaniment.” the fact that the word accompaniment didn’t’ come to him for years is a little mind-blowing. but it’s what i’ve been trying to achieve with me more recent forms of service (because i enjoy helping others). before coming to school, i volunteered at a women’s care center, helping pregnant and new mothers. it was very hands-on, and an amazing experience which i was very thankful for. i think it is applicable to all these weeks. overall life overall, my goal in life is to be happy and make everyone around me as happy as i possibly can. because of week 3 i am aware that there is a difference between joy and happiness: “it’s not a matter of whether this makes you happy or not because happiness is affected by many external factors (sleep, illness, hunger, loneliness, etc.). happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day.” i want to be one of the causes of the change in happiness for all people. i want to be the reason people are happy every day, but do this in an honest way as to not create an echo chamber for people: “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion. this insight into the differences between bubbles and echo chambers provides the key to understanding how we can protect ourselves from the dangers that each present to the way that we form our beliefs” (week 11). happiness should not come at the expense of one’s growth in his or her beliefs. to finish my integration, and my first-year experience, i include a final (short) copy of my mission statement (week 13): my name is lucia, and i am a loving sister, daughter, friend, and full-time college student. i am truly at my best when i am doing something for others, especially when i have a duty to contribute to someone else’s happiness. i thrive on learning new activities and skills. i always make it a goal to understand the task i am given and perfect it to the best of my ability which is why i have had so many different hobbies, such as origami, rubix cube, magic tricks, piano, track, etc. this is why i enjoy meeting and helping new people. it feels like a new task to learn what he or she needs, and i enjoy the challenge. it gives me something to work towards. helping others and having a job to serve others makes starting an action a lot easier than if it is for oneself. i am dedicated to helping the people around me be the happiest they can be with what they are given. this pursuit will be aided by my love for learning new things, and seeing the happiness of others, therefore causing my own happiness. my ultimate goal is to inspire others to do the same for their own families and friends. though this may seem like a lot of little changes, i also see it as a really big change in society. making a little positive difference causes a ripple effect and is the root cause of thousands other small positive differences. my moreau first-year experience has truly been an unforgettable one. it’s been a great year for learning about myself, college, and a life well-lived. “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted. – moreau fye week 1 "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2 “three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4 “week five discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week 5 “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau fye week 6 why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye week 7 “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9 “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost – moreau fye week 10 “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd – moreau fye week 11 “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” – moreau fye week 12 “complete: writing a personal mission statement activity” – moreau fye week 13 li 1 anthony polotto moreau first year experience 19 november 2021 difficulty and development: the notre dame experience asking people for advice in a tricky situation is perhaps the easiest way to demonstrate how everyone reacts to situations differently. everyone has their own reasons for giving certain advice, and nobody is ever explicitly right or wrong; the “correct” answer often never exists. each person’s unique worldview and knowledge differs, so it’s natural that their responses would differ as well. similarly, spending the past few months as a college freshman has led to a lot of unique experiences and personal development. through my experience so far at notre dame, i’ve encountered loneliness, community, and struggles that i had never been exposed to anywhere else before. while not all these experiences have been pleasant ones, they’ve helped me develop my character by realizing that even during times of struggle or loneliness, there are ways to overcome these obstacles. one of the most noticeable experiences that i’ve encountered in the last few months was an overwhelming sense of loneliness. even though i’m constantly surrounded by people in the dorm, classes, clubs, and on campus, something felt…off. suddenly leaving behind a close group of friends and family had a very noticeable effect. while i didn’t expect to immediately gain close friends and form unbreakable bonds within the first few weeks of coming to college, the feeling of loneliness was a strange experience. however, i think i slowly started to realize that i wasn’t the only one feeling this way. although some people found others that clicked with them and started to have a tight-knit group within the first few weeks, i realized that similarly to me, a li 2 lot of people didn’t. just like me, most people had a transition period where they had to branch out and figure out who they did and didn’t want to form close relationships with. however, it was really moreau that made me realize that i had to stop blaming myself for not immediately feeling this sense of inclusion, as one of the articles said, “loneliness is too often paired with self-blame and self-criticism: ‘i can’t find my place among these people, so it must be my fault’” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann – moreau fye week nine). this article really demonstrated to me that it wasn’t entirely my fault for feeling this way. over time, i have started to find people to be friends with and started joining a few groups as well. i think this experience was (and still is) important to my personal development because it made me learn that i won’t always immediately fit in at a new place. it takes time, and i shouldn’t panic or blame myself during this transitional period. another thing i heavily encountered in the last few months was this overwhelming sense of community. my dorm (keenan) and my ra (nick) are constantly trying to get people to show up at section events and dorm events. although some events are vastly more successful than others, it’s a weird feeling to feel such a strong sense of community within the dorms. it’s not just keenan as well, it’s every dorm on campus (or at least that’s the feeling i got from talking to people from different dorms). i think this experience has taught me that it’s important to be inclusive of everyone, even if there are people within the community that don’t get along with each other. an article from week eleven claims, “the concept of community must embrace even those we perceive as ‘enemy’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer – moreau fye week eleven). this demonstrates that people must be inclusive of one another even if they don’t particularly like each other. if the community only includes the ingroup, then it becomes an echo chamber where there’s no diversity of opinions or people. if people are li 3 excluded, it leads to hatred, and as fr. john jenkins has said before, “hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action” (“wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address” by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. – moreau fye week ten). the experience of community at notre dame has taught me that it’s important to embrace everyone of differing backgrounds, opinions, and viewpoints even if i don’t agree with them. it’s only through disagreement that each side can understand each other and learn from one another. however, the transition to college life hasn’t been all fun and games. a lot has been rough. learning to balance academics, extracurriculars, and social life has been a huge struggle. adjusting to a new environment, schedule, and the comfort of home life has been a transition that has come with its difficulties. plus, the aforementioned loneliness was definitely a struggle as well. however, overcoming these obstacles and learning to get past them has made me develop resiliency and adaptability. as c.s. lewis said, “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” (“the screwtape letters” chapter 8 by c.s. lewis – moreau fye week twelve). i completely agree with lewis, as it’s only during times of difficulty that people can grow and develop their character. if life had no difficulties and no struggles, then we would never change. by struggling at notre dame and learning to adapt to a new life, i have learned to be more adaptable and resilient to changes and obstacles that may come my way. although overall i’ve enjoyed my time here so far at notre dame, i would be lying if i said it’s been all fun and games. although the football games and section events have been a blast, the other parts of college have taken time to adjust to. the feeling of loneliness at the beginning of the semester that still rears its head occasionally, balancing academics, social life, li 4 and extracurriculars, and adjusting to life away from home has come with its fair share of obstacles. however, i think that these difficulties have allowed me to grow as a person and develop a stronger sense of resiliency and adaptability. i truly believe that these experiences will play a vital role into shaping me into a better person, and i have no doubts that that next couple of years here at notre dame will continue challenging me in unimaginable ways. however, that’s exactly what i signed up for and look forward to how these experiences will continue shaping me in the future. microsoft word moreau integration final draft.docx moreau first-year experience integration 1 pedro bolsonaro making the dome my new home: what notre dame revealed to me about myself. when i received my acceptance letter from notre dame, i was beyond excited about being inserted in an environment where i would not only develop my academic and professional prowess, but also flourish spiritually. i knew that what made notre dame stand out from other universities was exactly the opportunity to consider and internalize grand questions such as: “who i am?” and “what do i believe?”. through the moreau fye i have been challenged to critically reflect on these questions and engage with peers from different cultural, religious and geographic backgrounds as myself, further encouraging my standing within my community. my eight weeks of incredible experiences and lessons at notre dame had led me to forge a fair understanding of my root beliefs – the fundamental creeds that underpin the ventures i undertake, the thoughts in mind, and the character of my soul. these can be resumed below: 1. i believe i am searching for life-long meaningful relationships (w1) and a balance between personal and resumé virtues (w2). 2. i believe my purpose is to authentically and meaningfully embark on a journey of selfdiscovery (w3). 3. i believe i grow by using failure as a lesson (w5) and by discerning bad relationships and acting on them (w4). 4. i think i am responsible for reflecting on my upbringing and giving back to my community (w6) while pursuing the truth at all costs (w7). in the first two weeks of the course, i was invited to ponder on my aspirations, whether that is within my community or for my own personal goals and objectives. in week 1, i concluded that i found happiness in building life-long and meaningful relationships, and that these genuine connections were achieved when we allowed ourselves to become vulnerable. i was inspired by dr. brown’s ted talk, where she said, “this idea that for connection to happen, we must have to allow ourselves to be seen, really seen (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown – moreau fye week one)”. i have taken the initiative to be less reclusive about my insecurities and fears and share these more with friends and family. though it has been a challenge as growing up i tended to be more apprehensive and reserved, particularly regarding insecurities, i have seen that often we end up sharing a common vulnerability, which creates a very powerful connection. on that same note, i believe i am also searching for a balance between personal and resumé virtues. the concept of personal and resumé virtues was first introduced to me by david brooks when he said “item 1 is the worldly, ambitious, external side of our nature. the side that wants to build, create, create companies, create innovation. item 2 is the humble side of our nature. item 2 is to do good to be good. to live in a way internally, that honors god, creation, and our possibility. (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks – moreau fye week 2)” growing up, i always wondered about what approach to life i wanted to take. questions like, “should i become an academic researcher in indiana or become a missionary in chad?” kept me up at night. the content of week 2 has showed me that perhaps the best course of action – i say “best” because there is no “right” – is finding a balance and living the best of both paths. one path is not mutually exclusive with the other, in fact they may be intertwined. your eulogy may be plenished with remarks of how determined of an entrepreneur you were, or how you turned the fortunes of your family around in the same way that your resumé might highlight your honesty with co-workers or your integrity when faced with a complicated situation. in week 3, students were encouraged to tackle purpose and consider their deepest motivations and meaning. after engaging with week 3 content, i believe my purpose is to authentically and meaningfully embark on a journey of self-discovery. fr. pete’s words was a great inspiration for me, particularly when he said, “the greatest journey you’ll ever go on is one of self-discovery. in this journey, success and productivity and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is authentically responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be. (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 3)” i find authenticity to be crucial in our path to self-discovery as without it we will never discover who our genuine selves are. if we do not find that, we will never explore the world and those around us to our fullest capacity. it has been a formidable challenge for me because often i am often insecure of my behavior or want to provoke a reaction of out of someone or want others to think of myself in a certain way. however, that is not being authentic as we are making ourselves something that we really are not. that is why here at notre dame i want to authentically develop not only my intellectual aura but also my heart and soul, discover and flourish my own spirituality, and become a beacon of good in the world for those around me. in the midway stage of the course, students were asked to consider what made them grow as individuals and as a member of a community. by the end of the week, i discerned that i enjoyed most growth when i strived for new endeavors, and in the advent of failure, reflected and learned from such experience. carla harris, in a public address event at notre dame said “what’s the worst that can happen if you take a risk and it doesn’t work out? so, you fail, but know this: failure always brings you a gift, and that gift is called experience – now you know how to do better, now you know how to do it differently, now you know how to do it successfully. (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau week 5). these words greatly resonated with me because for the longest time i was terrified of failure. i was scared that if i tried something, truly gave it my all, and still failed, it would disincentivize me from trying other new things; the fact of the matter was, i was not trying anything at all in the first place. furthermore, as a freshman, there’s nothing more important now than for me to escape my comfort zone and try out new things. from the simplest of actions, like starting a conversation with a fellow stranger student to more complex and challenging endeavors like applying for an internship at a large corporation, it always starts with the first step. in both cases similarly, if things did not turn out the way i wanted them to, so be it, at least i assumed that risk and learned from that experience. if things do go well, even better, i have achieved that which i wanted most. the truth of the matter is that trying out new things and taking risks always amounts to a win-win outcome. i decided to carry ms. harris’ words very close to heart as i am sure they will prove invaluable as i try to grow and become the best version of myself intellectually, spiritually, and physically. another way i believe i grow is when i successfully choose friendships that truly aggregate value and happiness to my life. when reading the article provided within the content bundle of week 4, a phrase particularly stuck out from the text, “if the majority of the things that come out of your friend’s mouth is a complaint or has some sort of a negative angle, you’re probably not having the most fun with them. (five signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor – moreau fye week 4” at the time this was very relevant as i had just become close friends with a person that could not help but complain about school, friends and life all the time we were together. despite being tolerable in the beginning, it got to a point where my entire mood changed just be listening to all the negativity that she released on me. instead of being a valuable friendship which helped me grow as a person (after all what are friends but those who push you to be better), i found myself getting worse every time i engaged in a conversation with her. putting the coursework i had just learned to practice, i started to distance myself gradually from them, which was difficult because the first step is always the hardest. however, as i did it become easier to take the next step, and then the next one, and the next, until eventually i was able to completely detach from that friendship and live more positively. finally, in the latter stages of the seven-week journey, we appraised and considered our responsibilities. i concluded that my biggest responsibilities, approaching it from a grand scale, was to reflect on my upbringing and give back to my community while pursuing the truth at all costs. in week 6, students wrote a poem about their background and reflected on their upbringing. it was personally a very enjoyable experience as i could reminisce about brazil and critically analyze, now with an external perspective, about the good and things of my native country. my conclusion reinforced a notion i previously had which is that i find myself in a privileged position where i am morally responsible for giving back to my community and those who supported my journey insofar. it is very easy to look at brazil from an outside perspective and see just the positive side of it – beaches, soccer, beautiful nature, and cordial people – and forget about the underlying but widespread issues that plague our country. i noted some of them in my poem, “we see poverty, dangerous streets, an uneducated population and widespread corruption, we see the things people from the outside don’t see.” that is why with the education i receive here, in order to make my contribution back to society meaningful, i must help others around me also be better, and inspire them to do good in the world, in the same way that i am trying to. i also believe i am responsible for pursuing the truth at all costs. there is nothing more noble and virtuous that detaching yourself from your most heartfelt beliefs and working together with others to pursue the truth. to pursue the truth in a world where we are bombarded with distraction not only from the outside, but also the inside, is the ultimate intellectual goal to strive for. in a world permeated with social media and quick information spread, there are so many examples of stories being exaggerated and manipulated to fit certain agendas, it becomes an extremely difficult task to pursue the truth. as chimamanda adichie points out, “the consequence of a single story is this: it robs people of dignity. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie – moreau fye week 7). that is why we should always strive to look for multiple sources and benchmark you own opinions and the facts you receive with other people, to see if the information you are receiving is impartial and true. this way we can safeguard ourselves against fake news and all the detrimental consequences of it. it sounds trivial just one individual deciding to take this initiative within a network of millions of users, but if we can inspire others to follow suit, then the virtual culture that we have in place contemporarily can be readily and effectively changed. that is why i hold so much responsibility in this sense, it does not only pertain for myself, but also for the well-being of others around me. bibliography (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown, tedxhouston– moreau fye week 1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabetw_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3) (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks) – moreau fye week 2” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim) (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. – moreau fye week 3 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois) (“2021 laetare medalist address” by carla harris – moreau week 5 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4) (five signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia taylor – moreau fye week 4 https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/) (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda adichie – moreau fye week 7 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story) integration three a home for hearts they say that home is where the heart is, and if there’s anything amanda had a lot of, it was heart. perhaps because of this, she wanted to make every place she went feel like home for herself and the people around her. this is in large part due to her first home, a loving family nestled right at the foot of the rocky mountains in littleton, colorado. it was here that she first learned the invaluable importance of love, support, compassion, a good work ethic, and many other principles that would go on to define her life. these lessons were further expanded upon by the many schools amanda attended throughout her life. the first to profoundly impact her was st. mary’s, which she attended from second to eighth grade. she discovered many things there including the indescribable worth of true friends, a very time-consuming love of reading, and her first real encounters with the catholic faith. after that it was mullen high school, which her dad and uncle had both attended when it was still an all boy’s school. here, she really began to hit her stride, making friends whom she kept for all of her life and exploring talents and activities that would come to shape the way she looked at the world. it was here that she was introduced to the concept of being “christ with skin on”—something she would strive to be from there on out. ("tattoos on the heart" by greg boyle – moreau fye week seven) after high school, amanda joined the ninth cohort of the holy cross-notre dame gateway program, which landed her at holy cross college for one year and the university of notre dame for three with some study abroad thrown in the middle. she majored in english and secondary education while also obtaining a minor in theology. during this time, she met lifelong friends, discovered her passions, and grew as an individual. despite initial worries about choosing a college, the four years that amanda spent in south bend, indiana, and studying abroad proved to be some of the most formative of her life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 amanda always strove to give back to every community she was a part of. she was well known for her kindness, willingness to lend a hand, and ability to see what other people needed, sometimes before they knew it themselves. this was recognized by her unexpected win of the outstanding student award and “best personality” superlative in eighth grade, followed by the esprit de corps award upon graduating mullen. the members of the mustang class of 2021 had it right when they nominated her for “most likely to become a teacher.” after working with charities and traveling for a couple years after graduating college, amanda returned to littleton to teach english and theology at mullen, much to her parents’ joy. during this time, amanda met the love of her life and married him after a couple years of dating. they raised several wonderful kids who all received her love of kindness, strong faith, and dedication to giving back. although she chose to make her home and raise her family in littleton, she had friends and chosen family all over the world, especially in the kitchener-waterloo area of ontario and in south bend. vacations were often spent traveling to visit some family friend or another with plenty of bookstore trips beforehand. in her free time, amanda enjoyed volunteering and being outside. she found it a welcome break from the business of everyday life. ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) she was also a huge movie nerd, an avid reader, and an occasional writer. it remains to be seen if she fulfilled her childhood dream of becoming a semi-famous writer. regardless, i know that as the end drew near, amanda was proud of all that she had done and all that she had become. ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week three) despite others’ high opinions of her, amanda struggled to achieve all that she did. she tended to get in her own head about a lot of things, which often made https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147209 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html it much harder to do the things she wanted to do. ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six) she considered herself to be a relatively average person with a larger-than-average heart and an outsized ability to do what she thought was right, regardless of peoples’ reactions. she saw herself as someone who was comfortable being comfortable and didn’t find overcoming fear natural. despite all of this, she knew that nothing good was ever rooted in fear ("hesburgh" – moreau fye week two) so she did her best to overcome it by going out and experiencing the things she found daunting, like going to college out of state or leading groups when she was asked to do so. ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four) this focus on growth gives me hope. i know i’ll never see another room brightened by amanda’s smile and i’ll never get just one more hug, but it gives me hope that we can carry on the things that we’ll miss about amanda. as for me, i’ll miss her hugs. i’ll miss the sticky-note messages she left just to let you know that she was thinking about you. i’ll miss the gifts that took her months to pull together, but were totally worth it in the end. we may never be able to hug like she could. we may never be able to offer a stick of gum in quite the same way when someone was upset. we may never be able to know what people need like she did, but i think she’d want me to believe that the essence of these acts can still be carried forward by the people in this room, the people whose lives she touched. we can pass on her kindness and the way she led by example. we can pass on her willingness to lend a hand and her humble sense of leadership. we can pass on the faith, the compassion, the quiet strength. we can pass on her love. we can be for others what amanda was for us. we can continue to give her heart a home and that is a beautiful thing. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147595 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147595 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147286 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ side note: i didn’t incorporate actual quotes from the readings, but if you want to see the quotes that their essences were found in, you can look here: integration three prep also i don’t have a hyperlink for the conversation activity from week five. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zr5wbnhgyvwsotiukk8fpvbtx3fao_1s-kansrpzlxu/edit?usp=sharing my personal mission statement: many want to know what people see when they look at them. the image we project is one of the driving forces to the way that people act. how people i do not know think of me is of little concern to myself; however, the way that i present myself to the people i care about most is one of the things that i tend to orient my life around. my goal in life has always been to make the people around me proud of the person that i have become and the happiness that i have obtained. i am the youngest of three in my family, with two older sisters leading the way ahead of me. they are six and seven years older than me, so my relationship with them has not always been extremely close. we never went school together, and they were out of the house, at college, by the time i was 13 years old. although they are a lot older than me, i love them beyond all measure, and i strive to be as successful as they have become in the future. the love that i have for my family is something that always pushes me to be a better person, because, as i mentioned earlier, i strive to make them proud. i will always orient myself around my family because they are who my life revolves around. i have made some friendship that i hope will last the rest of my life, and i will do everything in my power to keep those friendships, but one thing that i know will never leave me, regardless of any circumstance, is my family. although to some, orienting your life around a group of people may be an unhealthy way of living, the life that i desire as a result of my family’s values is as healthy a way of living as there is. i know that the life that will make my family most proud, is the life where i am most happy, and i know that my family will be by my side as i strive towards the best, most joyous life that i am able to lead. the almighty prize by john graney this is my mission and goal in life. to be a man the people i love can be proud to know. if i can look back at my life, and know that i made the people around me happy, i will then be a truly happy man myself. to become this man i have devised a three step plan: love the world around me, find my place to make a change in the world, and open myself up to its endless possibilities. with the help of my moreau first year experience course, i can gladly say that this process has already began and i can also say that the path the rest of my college career and life will lead has become a lot less clouded as a result of the knowledge i’ve gained during these first two semesters. with this three step plan and my personal mission fueling my life going forward, i am confident i can obtain the priceless prize of a life well lived. appreciation: there are people in this world whose lives have gone through torment that we can hardly ever imagine. people such as dr. kim who lost his ability to walk as a result of a freak snowboarding accident. before the accident dr. kim was a young man who dreamed of opening his own sushi restaurant. after the incident; however, that was no longer an option for kim. there were two reactions that this could have had on him. he could have given up, lived off his social security and been upset about the things that he had lost, or he could persevere and strive to better himself and find peace in his situation. i took a quote from this video that summarizes a point of view that we all should try to incorporate into our lives. “we often focus on the things we do not have” (5 minutes by aria swarrmoreau fye week 6). this story and quote spoke to me as a gateway perhaps more than the average person, in that many of my fellow gateway classmates feel mistreated by the notre dame community. they get upset with how we are treated in comparison to full time notre dame students as they look through their instagrams and feel resentment towards these students. with this point of view, how could you be anything but sad and angry? in week one we read an article by pico iyer which speaks about the chaotic society that has been created by technology. he states that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones;” (“why we need to slow our lives down” by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). instead of feeling sorry for myself, wishing i were a full time nd student, i have tried to focus on the wonderful opportunity that the gateway program has bestowed upon me and my many gateway friends. during my next three years at notre dame i am going to keep positive by taking time in my day to step away from the pressures of the world and take a moment to truly be grateful for all that i have. these moments of pure appreciation are vital to gaining a more complete perspective on life and it is going to be something i plan on integrating into the remainder of my college career. the glass-half-full point of view is something that we all need to carry along with us as we travel through the remainder of our notre dame careers, and our lives as a whole. comment by taylor kelly: thanks so much for making this connection to your experience as a gateway student this year. well done! comment by taylor kelly: i agree that a glass half-full perspective one is a helpful one to have. can you be specific about how you plan to bring that perspective over the next three years? what will that look like for you on a daily or weekly basis? making a change: for a while i struggled with how i could make an impact on the world. i didn’t see a way that i could make a worthwhile difference, and it truly bothered me deep within myself. when we attend a university with figures like father hesburgh leading the way, it is hard to feel that we could ever live up to such an unbelievable standard, and the truth is, we don’t. we don’t all have to be public figures that father hesburgh was, but the important thing that we should all carry along with us is the message that he was trying to give to us. “if it’s (government) is doing things that invades peoples’ rights or won’t advance human rights, then the civil rights commission ought to speak out and say something.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). this quote comes from the hesburgh documentary back in week 2 of moreau. this quote was said by none other than father hesburgh himself and it is a testament to his message that we should stand up for the things we believe in. of course not all of us are in the position to make changes on the level of the national government, but that is not the point. we are all in a position to make a change in this world, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem. “i cannot do this alone. each of us must do what we can, wherever we are.” (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. by dean g marcus cole, moreau fye week 12). although he was making such magnificent strides i think that father hesburgh would agree wholeheartedly with this quote from week 12 and it transitions nicely into the most impactful changes i have made in my life. the way that i have found my way to make a change has been through the inclusion of others through education. throughout high school, i partook in a variety of different community service events, but the one that stood out to me as the place i could make the most impact was while volunteering for the challenger baseball league. this league taught children with special needs how to play baseball. this event not only created the temporary effect of a great day, but the everlasting love and appreciation of the game of baseball that came afterwards. “‘to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice to be heard’ ” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steven reifenberg, moreau fye week 9) to leave these children with something they can cherish forever is why we go out and make a difference. i will continue to look for ways in which i can give back to the community during my time here at notre dame because bringing people up alongside myself is one of the sure ways in which i can obtain joyous growth going forward. one group in particular i have looked into joining as i move on to notre dame’s campus is the best buddies program. this program gives necessary one on one friendships to children with special needs in the south bend community and it is a truly amazing cause that i think would a truly rewarding experience. comment by taylor kelly: thanks again for including another great example that you have already experienced, in this case, you experience with the challenger baseball league. since this paper is supposed to be forward thinking to the next three years, can you be more specific about the ways you plan to give back to the community over the next three years? what are the specific groups you want to get involved with? opening up: as humans it is easy to surround ourselves with people that are very similar to us and share our same views and ideologies. these people make us feel comfortable and they reassure our beliefs. although this is comfortable, are we ever really growing? i think that one of the most important parts of growing into the wise, is surrounding yourself with a variety of viewpoints to develop your own personal perspective, as well as allowing different points of view to express themselves. in week 11, we learned about echo chambers and the dangers that they can have in stifling important, relevant viewpoints. a definition of these echo chambers is described here, “echo chamber: a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited. ” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). when we allow for only a single point of view to take hold of an area, certain viewpoints are completely disregarded even when they hold value. as i continue to look for opportunities to learn and expand upon my wisdom, i will avoid these echo chambers and place myself in areas where all sorts of viewpoints are accepted. here at notre dame i do feel that we have a variety of viewpoints and this fact is vital to my love for the university and its christian community. the community that has been created here has left a diverse collection of minds in one place and i will continue to be as outgoing as possible in a way that allows for me to take full advantage of the various viewpoints notre dame has to offer. a source we looked at in week 12 states that, “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion.” (spirit of inclusion at notre dame author n/a, moreau fye week 10). this inclusion mention i believe attains to both inclusion of different types of people, but also a variety of viewpoints. this idea of opening up i think has two sides that are equally important to developing the person i am today and want to continue becoming in the future. the first part i went over above involves opening up to all sorts of people and points of view, but the second part involves more opening up to the world itself and the opportunities that lie outside of our comfort zone. just as we must move outside of comfort in terms of who we surround ourselves with, we must also look outward to find knowledge that cannot be attained within the comfortable town of south bend. way back in week 4 we talked about career opportunities, and one of the main pieces of advice was to “ … just get out and experience life! ” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). although it is seemingly simple advice, its relevance should not be lost as we move closer and closer to starting a career. this same message was carried even further by pope francis himself in week 7 when he said that “they (fears of never achieving happiness) can be overcome if we do not lock our door to the outside world ” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francismoreau fye week 7). this message is especially relevant to folks who are not happy in their current situation. i have seen far too many people remain in an unhappy place due to fears of what going elsewhere may bring. having such a fearful, closed mindset will do nothing but limit the amount of happiness you are capable of and limit the opportunities you are able to take advantage of. during my discernment conversation with my father in week 5, this was something that he wanted me to make sure that i continue to work on going forward. he mentioned my time as child when i was reluctant to try new things when i wasn’t proficient in the task immediately and this characteristic prevented me from riding a bike for a concerning amount of time. he assured me in this discernment conversation that “it is okay to fail” and expressed to me that only through failure can you learn to be better. i have been training for the last six months to try out for the notre dame football team this summer. i know that the chances of making the team are not great, but i know that i have become a better, more healthy person as a result of this journey i have decided to embark on. i am confident that regardless of the outcome, i will be a happy person. i will continue to work on this attribute of excepting failure so that hopefully by the time i die, i will have lived my life with no regrets. knowing that our lives are finite is something that we must all take advantage of in our day to day lives. without the known ending that is to come, each day may feel like it has little to no meaning. i like to think about the end when things may seem blue because doing so helps me keep things in perspective. in week 3, we learned about a nun who preaches and practices a meditation on death. she said that “the practice of regular meditation on death is a venerable one.”(meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). although i wouldn’t go as far to say i meditate on death, having the knowledge and active thought that our lives are meaningful and finite is crucial to living a life worth living. comment by taylor kelly: thanks for drawing in this example from growing up! conclusion: as i look into my future here at notre dame, and the future that lies beyond my college career i feel excitement. many feel fear, angst, and discomfort with the idea of the unknown, but as a result of my time here in moreau i can truly say that i have found a path that will lead me in the foreseeable future. although this path my have creeks and caverns, i will continue to rely on the people i care about most to build me bridges along the way. i am truly grateful for the experiences this class has given me and i will carry them with me as i strive for the almighty prize that no amount of money or success can buy: a life well lived. microsoft word moreau integration 3.docx mr. reaume : a man with a life well lived we are gathered today not to mourn a loss, but to celebrate a life well lived. we all knew carson in one way another, and boy, was he a character. as i’m sure most of you can agree, carson lived his life in a way that made him a model and a mentor to others. each day he greeted us with a smile and tried to brighten our lives. in memory of his virtue, i would like to touch on a few characteristics and moments that i believe made carson, carson. one commendable attribute carson embraced was his diligence and focus. something carson kept in mind and shared with me was how “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). as a businessman, carson was constantly inundated with information regarding his professional life. despite this, i always respected how carson made time for his family and friends. he found the time to put away his technology, set the stress of work aside, and spend time with those he loved the most. yes, he was diligent and focused on his work, but even more so on his relationships. he was able to prioritize those who were most important to him, a trait that most people strive for. he also used this time for self-reflection, allowing him to become a better man for the people he loved. in this way, carson allowed his focus and diligence to extend beyond the professional realm into his personal life, making him a better man. one piece of carson’s life that he was always proud of and never shy to share about was his time at the university of notre dame. his favorite way to describe notre dame was as “a place that made me a better person” (“serving the country in pursuit of a better world” by terrell hunt – moreau fye week two). carson showed a true passion and love for notre dame. in discussions with him he shared with me why he chose this university. he saw academic challenge as a key to his path to success. beyond academics, carson appreciated the religious aspect of notre dame. joining a religious community, carson hoped to explore and deepen his faith. as he learned about faith, he allowed it to shape him into the man we all knew. carson also liked to harp on the idea of community at notre dame. during his time at notre dame, carson formed lifelong friendships and relationships, as some of you here today can attest to. he fully embraced the community and beauty of notre dame, allowing his academics, relationships, and challenges to contribute to his growth as a person. another virtue that carson prided himself on was joy. carson loved happiness, but he believed that, “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). carson lived with the realization that happiness is subject to external factors, but joy comes from within. he started each day by finding joy so that he could make an impact on those around him. but where did he find joy? his friends, his family, his faith. everything about carson stemmed back to these relationships. for carson it was easy to find joy because he formulated his life around it. even his profession brought him joy. carson realized that joy was something he could always have no matter what happened. and that made him a great man. next, i would like to touch on a piece of carson’s life that not everyone might know about: his mentorship. in the midst of work, family, and friends, carson would dedicate his time to mentoring college students. as a graduate himself, he understood the stress and anxiety associated with life decisions. maybe helping students even made him feel young again. one of his favorite things to point out was the misconception that “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). carson recognized that college students feel like they are in a type of funnel when they decide a major. he encouraged them to break out of this funnel and explore careers outside of what they think their major restricts them to. that is part of the way he found his joy; he explored options outside of his major and found what gave him joy. beyond an academic standpoint, carson tried to guide students through reflection. over the years, carson refined his process of reflection so that he could gain a better understanding of himself. he tried to encourage students with the fact that he himself was once not good at reflecting. he was distracted by technology and work and never wanted to dedicate time to address his problems, but when he focused on reflection his life began to change. one idea from his reflection process that he tried to pass on was “when we examine the causes of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors — which we often do by asking ourselves why? questions — we tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). carson had already experienced the pitfalls of reflection and tried to guide others to avoid these mistakes. he knew that effective reflection needed to ask deeper, hard questions to challenge his own self-image and perception. through mentoring students, he helped open their minds to exploration, hoping they might find the joy that he had. another aspect of carson’s character is one that is a positive, but some may view as a negative. no matter the time, the place, or the person, carson always cared and wanted to make people happy. a quote he continuously said, but seemed to disregard quite often, was “you can’t make everybody happy” (“discernment discussion” by my mother – moreau fye week five). like some people might say, carson was always “putting himself out” for others. he wanted the best for others no matter the cost to him. of course, this sometimes ended badly for carson, but he never gave up. he thought that by continuing to look out for other he could spread love. at times it was hard, but he had a calling in faith and love to continue caring for those who did or did not care for him. i thought this related well to something mother teresa said: “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven). i think this is something we could all take away from carson no matter how well you knew him. to exemplify true love, you must be willing to make sacrifices. carson understood this and embraced it in his mission to spread love and joy. some people may view sacrifices as a bad thing, but carson came to the conclusion that sacrificing made him better. he taught and showed all of us how to love by giving of yourself. carson was a man like no other and we were truly blessed to have him. he showed us all how to live a full and joyous life. rest in peace. microsoft word olkiewicz_michael_integrationthree.docx professor taylor moreau 1 march 2022 yolo the majority of the world today views a "well-lived life" as universal or similar for everyone. this view consists primarily of materialistic achievements such as money, a large house, and fancy cars. with advancements in technology, globalization is happening at exponential rates. people thousands of miles away bolster their success on all types of digital media platforms to achieve a sense of satisfaction of accomplishing a well-lived life. until recently, i had been solely focused on future materialistic accomplishments, but this view has begun to diminish in my head. although i still want to be wealthy, discerning what makes me happy in life has made me no longer have complete tunnel vision. i still can't entirely grasp this idea of a well-lived life because of my lack of experience, but it begins with unbiased selfreflection. when actively reflecting and seeking answers, the guidance of a well-lived life unique to yourself begins to become a bit less foggy. as previously stated, figuring out a well-lived life began for me with proper and unbiased reflection. this meant not sugarcoating failures such as schools i wasn't accepted into or bad test grades but holding myself accountable for things i could control. i obtained this perspective very early on in moreau when pico iyer stated, "it's only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) means, and to take in the larger picture" (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in other words, if we're constantly on "go mode," then we never will see the bigger picture, but only the fixations of the moment. we need to slow down our lives and zoom out to get a deeper understanding. coincidentally, the next week of our moreau curriculum displayed an individual who could grasp the bigger picture. this individual happens to be the most famous president of the university, father hesburgh. father hesburgh's unique well-lived life is one that inspired me. father hesburgh defied norms, broke negative relationships, and persistently fought to make the world a better place, making him one of the most well-respected individuals ever. he has inspired me not to follow the norms, battle evil, and be ambitious. this translates into my perception of a well-lived life: always giving full effort, making a difference in this world, and never giving up things you find passion in. as of now, i'm passionate about my career, family, and friends, so i've been trying to apply these inspirations to my circle. although i might not have made a difference to the world yet, i like to think i've had positive influences on the people i love the most, teaching them concepts that they won't forget. to expand upon my career, i'm a finance and economics major, meaning that i deal with this concept of money on a day-to-day basis. this choice of major fits into this idea of monetary success because of the usual drive to become rich from these careers. although i intended to become wealthy essentially, i have figured out some jobs that translate to my new "well-lived life." i have recently begun venture capital research with platform venture studio. this company was founded by two notre dame alumni, jeremy burton and tim connors, who is on a mission to combine finance and morals. they believe the vc field should be investing in profitable companies and companies that make the world a better place. i've begun integrating this mindset into my career choice, looking to combine the world of finance with sound morals. our moreau curriculum stated, "studying what you love is a core value of the ccd's it is not something to which we merely pay lip service. there is no "best major" out there but there is a "best major for you "(“navigating your career journey” by merulo center for career development moreau fye week 4). money makes the world go around, and this fascinates me. i've always wanted to study the economy and financial markets to learn how to manage money and understand its value. a combination of understanding how money works on top of doing what's right is a life that i want to live. i want to use money as a source of good, not leverage. another aspect of my idea of a well-lived life is understanding what loved ones around you perceive of you and taking advice. in week 5 of moreau, we did a discernment activity in which we asked a series of questions to someone close to us. i chose my mom for this because of her excellent insight into life itself. in this, one of the questions was 'what is difficult to say but important for me to hear?" (moreau fye week 5). in this, i got an interesting yet honest response. she told me it's tough for her to go against me, so she tends to sugarcoat scenarios that she shouldn't. this made my head go rapid-fire and related to this idea of a well-lived life. should someone always try to please you, or should they hold you accountable? this response from my mom made me realize that accountability is a significant aspect of a well-lived life. if someone never tells you when you're wrong, you never learn from poor decisions and won't change. living a good life means seeing the good in bad situations and making the most out of it. this also relates to relationships, which is i've always pondered this idea of negative and positive relationships. the idea of having negative relationships seems poor at first, but if you only experience positivity, you're not experiencing life. life means dealing with people that give you a hard time and overcoming this adversity. relationships are necessary to a well-lived life and can't be avoided. pope francis exercised his views of relationships as "none of us is an island…and we can only build the future by standing together" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). the human race develops by working together, helping us achieve a well-lived life. many people want to use success to measure a well-lived life, which isn't the most accurate proxy. with this in mind, even if you do use success, the definition is much more meaningful than monetary success. within a text a couple of weeks back, it says, "after so many years of researching the subject of insight, i've come to believe that the qualities most critical for success in today's world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication, and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness." (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this definition of success catches my eyes because it says all of these favorable qualities, such as empathy and emotional intelligence, lead to success. there is nothing about a drive for money or test scores, but it's people skills. in other words, having emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, and the others labeled leads to a well-lived life. a quote i read that resonated with me was "suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the "bright and shiny" is superficial and inauthentic" (“meet the nun who wants to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i decided to save this until the end because it's an excellent way to wrap my writing up. death is a challenging topic to think about, but it's necessary to live a well-lived life. it would be best if you discerned what's essential for you because you're not here forever. whether traveling the world, living on the beach, or being in an important urban center, do it because you only live once. everyone has a unique life, so their perception of a well-lived life is unique. all of the topics i discuss are methods to figure out the best-lived life for a specific person. many people might have very similar well-lived lives, but everyone differs slightly. there is no reason to measure yourself against anyone else to discern whether you lived a well-lived life. reflect upon yourself unbiasedly to determine if you're satisfied and happy in life. in addition, there's never a wrong time to do the right thing and don't use monetary value as a proxy. more so, take advice from your loved ones and make the world a better place. in my opinion, quality of life, selffulfillment, and making a difference. capstone integration teasley 1 professor espeseth moreau first year experience 29 april 2021 a golden experience at the golden dome mission statement: my first semester at notre dame made me realize that while school is important, it is ok to sacrifice a little bit of studying in order to preserve physical health and spend time maintaining friendships. in my life, it is one of my missions to be available for my friends. i believe that my purpose is to solve problems. as technically the middle child, it was pretty much always my job to mediate whenever my younger twin brother and my older sister fought. solving conflicts like these starts with understanding each side of the argument. i believe that every argument has two sides. it would be unfair to only consider one side when developing a solution. even when it is difficult to understand someone’s side if it is clearly opposite of my virtues, i should still attempt to view the situation from their perspective. i believe that helping others is the most important thing i can do with my life. as an engineer receiving an education from notre dame, i am in an optimal position to become a premiere version of myself and maximize my potential so that i can better serve others. it is therefore my mission to use my talents, resources and career path to help others. (moreau fye week thirteen) as stated in my mission statement, i believe that the best way to help others is by finding a hobby or choosing a profession that you genuinely enjoy doing. this motivates you to put your teasley 2 best foot forward in whatever you wind up doing. as the notre dame career center wrote, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life! everything you’ve done to this point, as well as all the interactions you’ve had with others, have already started shaping your vips. ” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i believe it is important to never be afraid to try new things. by doing so, you will eventually find something you are truly passionate about. for example, i used to work at chick-fil-a. i quickly realized that i strongly disliked the monotony of working in a kitchen. this experience taught me that working in fast food is not the best way that he can serve those around him. while putting himself out there and exploring new interests, i learned the value of meditation. as pico iyer stated, “don’t just do something. sit there.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). although it seems counterintuitive, sometimes we need to do less to do more. before coming back to school after winter break, i spent his final hours at home rushing to pack and to see my friends and spend time with my parents and siblings. when driving, i usually enjoy listening to my 80s rock on full volume to keep my energy going. on the two hour ride back to school, however, i decided to drive in silence and reflect on what kind of semester i wanted to have and on what kind of person i wanted to ultimately become. this car ride allowed me to clear my head and evaluate what was keeping me from accomplishing my goals and come up with a plan to eliminate excuses and have a productive semester. at notre dame, i have also realized that too much of the wrong type of meditation can be harmful. too much self reflection on the things i cannot control can be negative for your mental https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ teasley 3 health. as tasha eurich noted in her study of people who do various amounts of self-reflection, “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives. what’s more, these negative consequences seemed to increase the more they reflected” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). it might be easy to assume that those who reflect on who they are more often would be confident with who they are and with where they are going because they have spent more time thinking about it. however, this study suggests that those who reflect on themselves more are more likely to be stressed, depressed, anxious, and less satisfied with their lives. this study taught me that i should focus more on the things that he can do and the talents he had instead of focusing on the traits he could not possess, like wishing to be taller. at notre dame, i often found myself comparing myself to my taller, stronger, and smarter friends. however, to live a life well-lived, i learned i have to accept the things that i cannot control and begin to focus on the things that i can control, like working out and studying more. when meditating in the right way, moreau made me think of how i want to be remembered. as fr. michael himes said, “the central issue in being a human being, and therefore in being a christian, is what the new testament calls agape – a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other.’” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). the definition of the word agape aligns closely with my definition of a life well lived. i believe that a life well lived should be guided by a desire to help others. i also believe that it is important to genuinely enjoy what you are doing in order to maximize what you are providing the community with because when you enjoy what you do, your own happiness and satisfaction with your work will https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/471135?module_item_id=145929 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/471135?module_item_id=145929 teasley 4 incentivize you to work harder for and give more to your community. this made me realize that i want to be remembered for my passionate assistance to others. fortunately, i am in the best position to learn how to help others at the university of notre dame, which father hesburgh once described as “a crossroads where all the intellectual and moral currents of our times meet in dialogue. a place where all of the burning issues that affect the church and the world today are plumped to their depths in an atmosphere of faith, where differences of culture and religion and conviction can coexist with friendship, stability, and even love” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). notre dame is a place where students are called to solve problems in an environment where a multitude of perspectives are present and many different cultures are celebrated. much like father hesburgh’s accomplishments, notre dame puts many different cultures and backgrounds into conversation and produces solutions. i would like to use the skills i am learning while at notre dame to become a leader in the aerospace industry to lead not just my country, but all of humanity into the next frontier, which is space. thanks to moreau, a conversation with my mother solidified my thought that engineering is my passion (moreau fye week five). she told me a story about when i was in second grade and building legos. she had bought me a 1,000 piece imperial star destroyer lego set for christmas. she told me that i spent the next two days locked in my room putting it together. when i finished and was excited to show her the completed build, my twin brother smashed it back into a thousand pieces. instead of getting upset, i picked up the pieces and went back to my room to rebuild the ship. my mother told me that as i grew up, i always looked for solutions to problems immediately. it is this quality that she thought would make me a great engineer. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 teasley 5 at notre dame, i have learned that one of the most important traits of a good leader is empathy. as pope francis said, “as i meet, or lend an ear to those who are sick, to the migrants who face terrible hardships in search of a brighter future, to prison inmates who carry a hell of pain inside their hearts, and to those, many of them young, who cannot find a job, i often find myself wondering: ‘why them and not me?’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). this quote stood out to me because it offers a new perspective for the way i see others who are less fortunate than me. i learned to put myself in their shoes and realize that we all have needs, desires, and feelings. at notre dame, i have realized that helping people who are suffering is not a one way street. people tend to give back. this is best described by experiencing accompaniment, a term that steven reifenberg illustrates on a mission trip to santiago: “but it wasn’t only when i was sick that they accompanied me. they accompanied me – especially the kids – as they taught me spanish, and as they helped me understand the complexities of their lives and the possibilities for finding some paths forward, which we began to work on together.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). it surprised me that while reigenberg intended to help the children in santiago, the kids and community ended up helping him. after nursing him back to health, the kids and reifenberg were able to come up with and implement solutions together. even though both parties were suffering, they were able to collaborate and use each other to come up with ways to move forward. i feel that i have experienced accompaniment at notre dame. when i first got here, i suffered in the sense that i felt alone. however, after stepping outside of my comfort zone and introducing myself to other guys in my dorm, i realized that i was not the only one who suffered in this way. by talking to and hanging out with each other, we all were able to help each other not be alone. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit teasley 6 at notre dame, i have learned that a life well lived includes celebrating others for their differences. if everyone celebrated people’s differences, more people would feel comfortable and therefore the average level of happiness in society would increase. one moving story that shows the harm of not celebrating people’s differences is that of jacob walsh. walsh writes, “it’s easy to see in retrospect that i was in denial. i didn’t know many people who were gay, let alone anyone who was both gay and catholic. it seemed to me that there was no future as a catholic if i was gay, but i did not want to walk away from the faith. this sexual orientation did not fit into any possible image i had for how my life could play out. being catholic did. so denial made sense.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). because walsh believed that the catholic community would not accept him for his sexuality, he lied to himself and remained closeted. in my life, i was raised in a catholic family and have a gay twin brother. unlike jacob walsh, as i grew up, i began to drift away from catholicism as i am unable to reconcile the fact that catholicism teaches against homosexuality. i believe, however, that people should be allowed to be whatever they want without judgment. i believe that our differences make us beautiful and should therefore be celebrated. to become an effective leader as part of my plan to live a life well-lived, i must learn how to consider multiple perspectives. dr. paul blaschko advises not only to consider but seek out other opinions. blaschko writes, “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i believe that the act of trying to truly listen to the other side is not done enough in today’s society. reaching out to learn about the other side, one can reach a solution in which both sides benefit. as the middle child, i have had to mediate my fair share of https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://youtu.be/gaivxqcqnls teasley 7 arguments. i have learned that to come up with a solution that both sides can agree on, it is necessary to understand the motives behind both sides. as a good leader, i must be courageous. week twelve of moreau taught me an important lesson, which is the distinction between bravery and courage. a story that outlines this distinction is that of dean g. marcus cole when humiliated by a white police officer. cole writes, “at that moment, i remember thinking that the most important thing i could do for my sons was to survive the encounter. still, i have often thought about what lasting scars may have cut into their psyche by watching what that officer did to me that night.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i believe that the brave option would have been to fight back, teaching his children to stand up for themselves and be proud of who they are; however, he would be risking not only his life, but a fatherless life for his kids. i believe the courageous choice is to be submissive to the officer and escape the situation with his life, being able to teach his kids more lessons later on. the difference between bravery and courage is that courage is rational, intelligent bravery. when you are informed, you can be courageous for many other people. to me, a life well lived includes one of leadership, helping others, and having passion in what i do. the material discussed in moreau here at notre dame, combined with everything else i have yet to learn during my time here, will have put me in a perfect position to achieve my version of a life well lived. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ week 8integration one ladd 1 mr. drew espeseth moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 finding my “why” in the midst of chaos throughout these several weeks of moreau, i have been able to take a look inward in order to deepen my self-knowledge and truly understand what i believe. all too often, we are consumed by the immediate demands and fast-paced energy of everyday life, finding time to only focus on our surroundings rather than on ourselves. having this time to reflect internally has helped me center myself and strengthen my root beliefs so that i am strong in the courage of my convictions. i have several root belief statements that i hold true to my heart and feel allow me to understand the “why” behind my life. by expanding upon each, i hope to reveal more about my character and the influences behind my everyday decisions. i believe that i am searching for a sense of fulfillment and belonging in every aspect of my life. this is true especially in regards to my career, passions, and relationships. i have always been someone who values success, but the older i grow the more emphasis i place on living a happy life free from regret. in week one of moreau, we talked a lot about the importance of vulnerability through the lens of brené brown’s ted talk. brown emphasized the idea of allowing yourself to “be seen” in order to feel a sense of fulfillment and belonging in life. i found this concept to be quite noteworthy as i often viewed “being seen” as something weak or negative. brown took the opposite approach and provided several insights on how important authenticity and compassion are for each person. sometimes this task feels daunting, but i felt brown put it simply when she encouraged us “to do something when there is no guarantee” ladd 2 (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). brown emphasized the fact that being vulnerable can help me find a true sense of love and belonging within my community. throughout my first semester, i have tried to put myself out there in terms of clubs, relationships, and other opportunities. this was truly doing something with “no guarantee,” but it led to me getting an on-campus job, joining meaningful clubs that help discern my major, and meeting some of my closest friends thus far. there have been times in the past where not having any guarantee has failed me, making it challenging for me to be consistently vulnerable. however, i have learned vulnerability is all about putting yourself out there despite negative past experiences, and i have now shifted my view to see that it is truly positive to “be seen” by others. i believe that i grow by recognizing both my strengths and weaknesses and their influence on my life. growth is often thought of as something positive, however i have learned that the path toward growth is never smoothly paved, but rather riddled with bumps along the way. i have failed many times in my life and, though these experiences were negative, they are the ones that have allowed me to grow and learn about myself the most. this idea reminds of week two of moreau when we talked about the concept of adam i versus adam ii introduced by david brooks. brooks feels as though we think too much about our professional achievements and traits (adam i), rather than cultivating the truly meaningful qualities that would be discussed at our funerals (adam ii). as brooks said, “adam i is built by building on your strengths. adam ii is built by fighting your weaknesses'' (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks -moreau fye week two). over the years, i have found it easy to build on my strengths, however i am often afraid to grapple with my weaknesses. doing this takes more time and effort and requires blunt acknowledgement of my shortcomings and failures. what i have learned over the years, though, is that growth does not https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=2 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim ladd 3 happen without these realizations. being conscious of both my strengths and flaws and making an active effort to work on improving them in everyday life is my first step toward growth and character development. i strive to do this as i encounter both successes and failures throughout my college experience. i believe that my purpose is to ask questions about the world around me and dare to take a risk. i feel i possess a sense of curiosity, to an extent. i have a love of learning that was instilled in me from the time i was little. however, i often find myself staying within my comfort zone when it comes to certain topics that require lots of internal reflection, such as faith. growing up, my family identified with the christian tradition, yet we began to fall out of our faith routine as times got more hectic and busy. going to catholic school all my life made faith something that was always there for me. however, i wondered (and still continue to wonder) how faith fit into my life. in week three of moreau, we discussed the idea of self discovery and faith forming the world. as father pete said in his video, “the greatest journey you will go on is one of self discovery” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week three). this journey of self-discovery is ongoing, as people can learn something new about themselves everyday. father pete also mentioned that faith is central to this self-discovery process, and that things such as success, failure, and productivity should be an afterthought. i think this is important to remember as i often find myself getting caught up in the end goal, or what is to come next. i am often afraid to take a risk for fear of what could go wrong, rather than focusing on what could go right. however, i am lucky to be at an institution such as notre dame that promotes self-discovery, and i encourage myself to make an active effort to take risks and ask questions in order to understand topics such as what my faith truly means to me. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois ladd 4 i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by treating others how i would like to be treated. this “golden rule,” as some may call it, is something that i have always been a steadfast believer in. i have noticed that when i treat others with the same respect i would want to be given, they are more likely to reciprocate and form a positive relationship. this basic principle has been the basis of many of my closest relationships. we talked a lot about relationships— both good and bad ones —in week four of moreau. in an article from the grotto, they emphasized that “the best kinds of friendships are when you leave with a smile on your face” (“5 signs you're in a toxic friendship” by olivia t taylor moreau fye week four). i have been in several situations of “friendship” where i leave somewhere from spending time with people feeling drained and disappointed. people in my past life have fit the description of an unhealthy relationship, and i am grateful to have removed myself from those situations. however, i have come to learn through experience that these are not the types of people that i want to be around. on the other hand, there have been many times where i have left with “a smile on my face,” as the quote says. this is what friendship is all about — surrounding yourself with people who add value to your life and push you to be the best version of yourself. true friends always support one another, in good times and in bad. they lift one another up and give each other life when the other needs it most. these are the kinds of attributes that i look for in people when faced with the opportunity to form new relationships, and i continually work to display these traits to others. i believe that i am made to be a changemaker and force of good unto others. i want my life to have value, but by doing so i simultaneously want to add value to the lives of others. in week five of moreau, we explored the idea of making change and being a force for good. being at notre dame, i am immersed in a culture that places a strong emphasis on doing good, as this is the utmost principle the university was founded on. we had the opportunity to watch videos https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ ladd 5 and read articles that explained the history of notre dame, as well as the mission behind the university’s creation. as fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. says in his video about notre dame, “we cannot love the god whom we cannot see if we do not love the brother we can see” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education” by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). this idea exemplifies how we can truly make a difference in the world by caring for our neighbor, as it is through our neighbor that we see god. this connects back to the value i have for the golden rule, or treating others how you would like to be treated. by doing so, you are leading by example and encouraging others to have a desire to do good. at notre dame specifically, i have seen the genuine connection and care that the irish community has for one another. each person here has a sense of pride about the university and genuine desire to better themselves in every aspect. the component of faith unites the community together, regardless of where anyone falls on the religious scale, and reminds us of our obligation to others. i am very grateful and blessed to be at an institution that is not only renowned for its academics, but also for its mission and commitment to the betterment of the whole person. i feel inspired each day to go make a difference and enhance someone’s life better through my actions. that is difficult to find, and i feel lucky i can continue my next four years here. i believe that i am responsible for understanding my upbringing and how it influences my life. my family and background have always been very important to me, and i feel that they have influenced my view on the world greatly. in week six of moreau, we were asked to write a poem detailing where we were from. i did not take this as the physical place i was from, but rather as the values that are present at my very core. i discussed the appreciation i have for the simple moments in life as well as the value i place on tradition. i talked specifically about dinners with my family, describing them as “simple but powerful,/bringing us together/like we never left” https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 ladd 6 (“'where i'm from' poem” by moreau fye week six). whether it was a holiday, other celebratory occasion, or even just a random weekday, sitting down at the table with my family was where we truly got to connect. no matter what was going on, we found time to share a meal at some point together and take a break from the demands of everyday life. though dinner may seem like a simple and repetitive act, i have always believed sharing food and fellowship with someone is a perfect chance to connect. for this reason, i have always tried to engage with people in this way. at notre dame specifically, simple dining hall meals or nights spent on the library lawn surrounded by a plate of cookies have led to some very meaningful conversations and bonds formed. i look forward to what is to come if i continue to take the time to sit down with someone, share an experience, and make a connection. i believe that i pursue truth by working to understand all perspectives and by appreciating diversity. though it is important we value our own beliefs and traditions, it is just as crucial to make an effort to understand the views of those around us. i have always considered myself to be socially intelligent, as i am very accepting of diversity and conscious of the other perspectives around me. however, after reflecting on my life after the moreau assignment, i have come to learn that i possess biases that i do not even realize. in week seven of moreau, we talked a lot about the idea of “truth.” the common consensus is that everyone has their own definition of what is true for them, however, it is important that we realize the implicit biases that exist in our lives. we often take the single viewpoint or “story” we hear to be the whole truth. this is farthest from the case, as there is always a bigger picture and more knowledge to have. chimamanda ngozi adichie put it best in her ted talk when she said, “when we reject the single story, when we realize that there is never a single story about any place, we regain a kind of paradise” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). we as https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xjrt9ygg8s52rrad2i0nao8enbvbilk3cyxnmwb-a7w/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story ladd 7 humans must realize that there is not one set story or way of doing things, but rather a multitude of perspectives that add value and diversity to the whole truth. adichie encourages us to stray away from adopting one set notion as the truth as humans are always learning, changing, and figuring out new truths in our lives. it is our job to look at the bigger picture and make sure we have all the knowledge we can to have an informed opinion about the world around us. this goal of deciphering the truth is one i have as i move forward at notre dame and am faced with a multitude of opinions from my peers and others around me. the root beliefs discussed above are seven that i am able to confidently stand by and defend. though some have stayed constant in my life, others have been altered or made stronger through activities and discussions in moreau. developing concrete examples of my beliefs helps me understand what i prioritize in life, and also identifies what i hope to get out of my college journey and beyond. i feel i have a greater understanding of my “why,” or the reasons and motives behind my actions and values. i am looking forward to participating in moreau in the second half of the semester so i can continue to self-reflect and discover more about myself. https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story moreau integration four joy to change the world april 20, 2022 throughout my time here at the university of notre dame, i have evolved in many ways into a better person, with an enhanced view on the qualities which make a life well-lived. as will be explored in this piece, my prior life experience has blended with my life at notre dame to construct and reshape my values of my personality, and i now have a brighter vision of the future. features of my life, such as school and major discernment, fostering an inclusive community, and staying connected to my faith, have all been highlighted and strengthened at notre dame. each of these comprises an important part of my personal mission statement, of which one excerpt reads, “my goal as an upstanding human being and morally just citizen is to bring joy to other people. living selflessly and increasing the happiness of those around me is a responsibility which i treat with great pride, and i am determined to better the conditions and mindsets of those around me in unique ways” (“personal mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). my ultimate purpose in life is to bring others joy by any means at my disposal, and i have evolved over time to adapt these practices into my lifestyle for years to come. one of the pillars of my personal mission statement and my personality development is finding my place in the working world, in such a way that brings me joy, lifts others up, and creates a better world for those around me. even before arriving at notre dame, the process of major discernment has been on my mind, as i have loved the art of creation ever since i was young. one of the quotes to highlight this ideology reads, “‘what are the things you can’t leave alone?’ questions, concerns, issues that you return to over and over again because they fascinate you, they excite you, they really intrigue you, they lure you on, they get you to ask more and more questions. what are your obsessions?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael https://docs.google.com/document/d/1fpvcziru84sacd1l5phbijarwueyec9_i0vt4akbbui/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832/download?download_frd=1 himes moreau fye week 3). before arriving at notre dame, amidst my high school career, these questions of finding what truly excites me were answered in the form of building. i loved creating custom projects from lego bricks, and built my resume around creations which left a meaningful impact on those around me. during the college process, i also made sure that my passion and work dreams aligned with making a difference for others, as is alluded to in the quote, “he followed his passion for research to cornell, where his graduate studies focused on the development of aluminum nitride (ain)-based power amplifiers, which have yielded a breakthrough in the ability to produce high-power millimeter-wave frequency signals” (“domer dozen” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 2). dr. austin hickman is one of the acclaimed domer dozen, and seeing the passion behind his work, and the positive difference it has brought to the world around him, was truly inspiring. the idea of following a dream to bring joy to oneself and others is a notion i had not previously explored, but came to understand and accept. as my college time has progressed, instead of simply thinking about the actions i want to pursue in the workforce, i have also had to step out of my comfort zone and speak with others about their career. as one quote describes, “but you can only go so far with online research. eventually, you’ll need to get a first hand perspective and talk with people in career fields of greatest interest to you. you will learn so much by talking with someone in a career you are considering the good and the bad” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). though only a first-year student, i still need to branch out and speak to others in fields of interest to me to gain a better understanding as to what job genuinely appeals to me. reading and doing online research only means so much in comparison to having a conversation with someone who holds a job of interest to me, so i have begun these conversations slowly but surely. as a whole, navigating my college life with my major and intended work discipline in mind has been challenging, but the work i put into the search and journey now will be rewarded down the line. https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ in the future, i would love to have a job which harnesses my passion for building, which brings me joy, conjoined with an interactive or instruction-based medium to bring joy to others as well. stepping away from the academic scene, another important component of my journey as a notre dame first-year student has been exploring the art of inclusivity. growing up, i had always been taught to treat others as i would like to be treated, and this is often easier said than done. being on a very diverse campus, with students and staff from many different backgrounds, i have been exposed to a wider range of viewpoints and personalities than ever before. in the words of one quote, “pause for a moment and consider the magnitude of this message: we lose nothing of value by having no cross-racial relationships. in fact, the whiter our schools and neighborhoods are, the more likely they are to be seen as ‘good’” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). though the reality may be hard to swallow and shocking, it is extremely important to realize even the smallest unconscious biases play a role in determining who i choose to associate myself with, and this is a conflict i have worked to resolve at notre dame. this not only applies to the broader community, but also to me, since every problem should first be addressed in each individual, and knowing that we can always strive to make a better world is crucial for improvement. another impactful quote on the topic of inclusion and race relations is from dean g. marcus cole, who writes, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). embracing everyone in society, no matter their skin color, gender, religious affiliation, or background, is something i now hold closer to my heart than before coming to notre dame. expanding our circles of engagement may be difficult at first, but it is important to break boundaries and social norms with the goal of bettering society for https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ everyone. being exposed to many different and diverse people has made me realize that we are all on earth for a reason, and in such, all deserve to be treated with respect and included. in conjunction with accommodating others and bringing them into our circles, i have also learned about helping those in need by empowering them to speak their mind and voice their opinions. as one quote highlights, “‘solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,’ he said at the workshop. ‘this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard’” (“teaching accompaniment a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). this quote allows insight into the notion that simply speaking for those who do not have a voice is not enough, and in some cases, the wrong course of action. instead, the focus should be on empowering those who do not have a say to be able to voice their opinions themselves. when speaking on behalf of others, too often the original message can be lost in translation, and the initially helpful plan turns into a mistake which causes more pain. as a notre dame student, it is my responsibility to help those in need, and i can do so by ensuring they have a voice and place to freely speak their mind, no matter their background. all of these topics surrounding inclusivity have been ignited and fostered through my time here at notre dame, and are ideals i will strive to hold across the rest of my life. when looking at the framework of my life and how it conjoins together to form my mission statement, religion is a key component which my life would be incomplete without. ever since i was introduced to the catholic church from a young age, i have been filled with awe and inspiration at each and every mass or celebration. hearing the word of god, praying, joining with others in song, and participating in the sacraments are all critical parts of maintaining a strong relationship with god. with these in mind, i am proud to be maintaining and growing my faith here at notre dame, and this is a trend which i will strive to keep for the rest of my life. when i spoke with my grandfather earlier in the semester, faith was one of the areas he highlighted in living a meaningful life, and one takeaway was, “as he described the passion with https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit which i speak to the congregation or feel during a mass, i came to realize that my connection to the church is in fact a cornerstone of my personality, which should be further explored in the future. helping others and bringing a genuine sense of joy to those around me is a gift i often forget i possess, and would like to take more pride in and become even more involved” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week 5). staying engaged with the church in various ways, such as lectoring, allows me to take greater interest in my faith than if i were simply observing from the crowd. being front and center at mass, proclaiming the word of god, is a feat which brings me great joy in knowing i am fulfilling one of my religious duties, which is spreading god’s word. when i reflected on my journey of faith and the ways in which i want it to play out in the rest of my life, i dedicated a section of my eulogy activity to this idea. not only do i want to hold a strong connection to god, i also want to engage with those around me both in and out of mass. as i wrote in my eulogy, “expanding upon this sense of joy he brought to others within the church, luke remained connected to his faith, relationship with god, and bond with his community through his regular participation at masses and volunteer events. keeping him grounded and grateful, maintaining a connection to his parish and local area allowed for luke to feel a heightened sense of joy from meaningful communal involvement” (“moreau integration three” by moreau fye week 8). keeping the broader picture of my life in mind, i want to make sure my faith involvement leads me on a journey of self discovery and communal engagement, which i can see is taking shape now at notre dame. in maintaining a life of faith and purpose, i also need to ensure my vision and judgment remains clear moving forward, and that i am the best and most honest version of myself. one of the ways in which my mind could be filtered or ignore areas worth paying attention to is if i ever become trapped in a filter bubble or an echo chamber, both dangerous areas of control. as one quote about echo chambers describes, “in the second, the group itself took steps to actively discredit dissenters. as should be clear, echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles, partly because of their abilities to lock us into certain world views” (“how to avoid an echo https://docs.google.com/document/d/1iormbwrv51jgzfn8io3oirnxvvpeblsqevk7wujtyj0/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1i1nvgeqbhzwfrynjkor9ivshr8qql5cjyyeglsvoubs/edit?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). as the quote notes, being locked in an echo chamber is very dangerous due to the notion that once trapped, a person is unlikely to be able to speak their mind if it goes against the broader wishes of the group. making sure i am always at a place in life where i am free to speak my mind, whether on social media, with family, amongst friends, or within day to day interactions, will be critical to my success and mental health. also on the topic of mental health, when reflecting upon my life and interactions both in previous years and at notre dame, i notice i often fall into a pattern of introspection. remembering the past and thinking what has gone well and what i wish could have gone better is an important feature of growing as a person, but in the same token, becoming burdened by things no longer in my control is harmful. in the words of one quote, “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). taking time to be introspective and reflect on my life is a practice i find myself engaging within on a regular basis, especially as a mental break from classwork and studying, but doing so incorrectly leads to more harm than good. it is important for me, in order to live my best life and stay positive, to overcome the negative thoughts and emotions which may cloud my past, as there is always room for improvement in the future. since the primary goal for my life is to bring others joy, i must first be joyful and at peace with myself so that i can more fully give my time and effort to others. with my personal mission statement in mind, and serving as the guiding light for my future actions and endeavors, i now feel more prepared than ever to not only continue my journey here at notre dame, but start to look bigger and help others too. being on a wonderful campus with many diverse people has been fueling my drive for success and has now sparked a desire to help other people through my own passions, which i now have come to understand https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ as my purpose in life. as one quote expertly states, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down in our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). amidst the chaos of school, social life, sports, faith, and community, it is important to step back every once in a while and see the bigger picture of my life and how i fit into the world. recalling to mind my purpose and inner calling is very powerful and meaningful, and will keep me focused on the larger scheme of the world as opposed to being trapped in every tiny detail. if something goes wrong, it is crucial to look to the future after making amends with the past, not dwelling on failure but instead using it as an opportunity to improve. in the words of his holiness pope francis, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow. hope is the door that opens onto the future” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). having hope for the future and looking to be the best version of myself every single day is an attainable goal, and one which has become a reality during my time at notre dame. with my personal mission statement at the core of my life, i will be guided towards success and becoming the truest version of myself. i have the goal of bringing others joy, whether it be through my creations, inclusivity, church involvement, or anything in between, and i feel a sense of great joy already brewing inside of me. notre dame is the perfect starting point for turning this aim into reality, and i am ready to change the world for the better, with bringing others joy as my ultimate goal. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration benjamin loyd 2 april 2022 moreau capstone integration mission statement the root beliefs that i showed the ability to have i feel are perseverance and faith. it was a tough first semester of college with a lot of mistakes, trials and errors, and ups and downs, but i got through it and am grateful for my experiences in the first and second semester at notre dame. the eulogy helped me realize who i am as a person and my virtues. i have an idea of what i want to do for a job, but it could change in the future. i believe there is a god. this is not all a coincidence. i have experienced god many times in my life both big and small, and i am grateful for a god who loves and cares for me unconditionally, and one day be able to spend eternity in heaven with him. to be successful to me is not about having wealth, fame, and money. there is so much more to life than material objects. a successful life is one where you are able to spread the gospel of jesus and the love he has shown you to others around the world, and be a disciple of god. the highest good is very simple to me and that is to serve others. the earthly goal i chose this quote because everybody has the goal to live a life full of happiness and joy. however, this is only a very tiny part of time compared to eternity. i was watching an interview with famous basketball player kevin durant about happiness in life. he basically said that he does not chase happiness because life has its ups and downs. moreover, he says that he tries to just be at peace, and to enjoy every day of life. it reminded me of when father michael himes talked about the differences between joy and happiness. i thought about it for a while and thought that this take was interesting. so many people say “do what makes you happy” and i agree with that because god put that something in you that brings you joy. it makes me question though if you did everything that makes you happy could it lead to something that makes you unhappy? for example if you are christian and try to follow god, but then do something sinful in the moment to make you happy; you will realize that it was not worth it because the goal you are striving for is to be happy in heaven. it made me think that i should not necessarily be choosing happiness because it is a fleeing feeling. we should be chasing peace. peace does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble, or hard work. it means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart. i went into the transfer portal trying not to have expectations, but if i am being i had high expectations. i saw one of my former teammates enter the transfer portal from another acc school last year in may or june. i asked him what schools showed interest and what not and he named a ton of really solid schools. not to sound cocky, but i believe that i am a better player than he is. so why am i not getting the same recognition? i keep telling myself it is because i basically entered in the beginning of the season and teams are not looking necessarily for replacements yet. this is most likely true, but i feel a part of myself has some self-doubt. i am mostly not really worried about finding a new school, but it is hard not to think of the worst possibility sometimes. i find myself doubting my self worth and questioning how good i am. there are a thousand thoughts running through my mind. especially a person who deals with frequent anxiety. with that being said i also have some sense of comfort and tranquility. i remembered a quote from “navigating your career journey” that said “ it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order.” at the end of the day yes i want to know where i am going next, however i understand that god will put me where i will thrive. god uses life experiences to learn to trust him. so the prompt question is how does ben pursue a life well-lived? to pursue a life well-lived for me means to be able to accept things as they are and to trust god no matter what. in “growing up gay and catholic”, jacob walsh dealth with religious guilt frequently, until he realized that god accepts him for who he is, so he should too! even though notre dame was not the best fit for me for various reasons i am grateful for the experience. i learned a lot about myself that i can carry into the future. i learned that i have really no interest in the business side of things yet, and that going to the pre-med route is not the road to go on. however, i do still find kinesiology, athletic training/trainer, exercise science, fitness to still be of interest. it was tough doing the core requirements at an elite school with no really specific major in mind. hesburgh said that “there is meaning in suffering”. i learned how to better deal with my anxiety and other mental health issues that might occur. through non-judgment and mindfulness. it is tough to do mindfulness meditation in a way and self reflection because it can be boring. in “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich it explained, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection, but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” i experienced how to live on my own for long periods of time. i also learned that some people honestly don’t deserve you or your time. know your worth. in week eleven, “how to avoid an echo chamber”, they discussed how it is important to see different perspectives and to try to understand where somebody is coming from. this is important because we as a country are so divided basically into two categories: republicans and democrats. we need to be united and to spread love. dean g. marcus cole pulled a quote by martin luther king jr. that stuck with me in his prompt, it said, “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other." to pursue a life well-lived i have to go into it with an open-mind. an example that we went over was in “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” , here is he went to chile to try and help the children, but ended up getting sick and then later realized how much insight he got from those kids because they helped him. i have aspirations to be doing something in sports. whether a physical therapist, a trainer, or maybe even an mlb player, however if that doesn’t work out will i still be able to be at peace and be okay with what my profession is. for me i want to have a job that i love that makes good money, but what is more important is to fall in love and have a big family somewhere and be a great husband and dad. which is ironic because in the discernment in week five my mother told me that i value my faith and my family. it might sound a little cliche, but it is one of the things i am most excited for! pico lyer said, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be.” work should matter, but it should not totally consume your life because if god took it away today then would you be okay? the ultimate goal however as i said frequently throughout moreau is to make it to heaven and spend eternity with jesus! to close, i found this beautiful quote about god in “tattoo’s of the heart”, it says, “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgements, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love.” bibliography: why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer week 1 "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley week 2 "three key questions" by father michael himes week 3 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ by meruelo family center for career development week 4 complete "week five discernment conversation activity" by moreau week 5 “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich week 6 download _tattoos on the heart_ chapter 8_ jurisdiction (1).pdf by father greg boyle week 7 “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg week 9 "growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh week 10 “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko week 11 “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole week 12 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/468294/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808/download?download_frd=1 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 1 a life of praise praise god from whom all blessings flow, praise him all creatures here below; praise him above, ye heavenly host, praise father, son and holy ghost. amen. — the doxology of thomas ken https://christianhistoryinstitute.org/magazine/article/where-did-we-get-the-doxology daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 2 i could say much about this doxology, and i hope i have not said too much. i believe the entire entry below (my capstone essay) is essentially the “commentary” on the actual content of the doxology. the power and simplicity of those words above continue to speak after i’ve dissected them and interpreted them. i think that’s the best kind of mission statement — the explanation does not replace it, but clarifies it. i hope that this capstone essay represents a refinement and expansion of what i began to explain in my original mission statement from week 13. why praise? there’s something strange about praise when you first think about it. sometimes it seems like a kind of polite excess, a benevolent gesture, something given out of kindness and humility; but certainly not anything necessary. but as he has done with many other things, c.s. lewis’ brief reflections on the subject reframed my vision. while reflecting on the psalms of the hebrew bible, he remarks that “all enjoyment spontaneously overflows into praise unless (sometimes even if) shyness or the fear of boring others is deliberately brought in to check it” (reflections on the psalms, c.s. lewis). as i thought on this, i found it especially accurate about the god we christians worship: if god is the ultimate joy, then to “enjoy” is to immerse in the fullness of god. the deeper we go, the more like him we become. for someone to be like another says more than a thousand songs, a million paintings, a world of words. it is the highest form of praise (“mission statement” by — moreau fye week thirteen). in light of that, it seems evident that the best way to live out this mission statement — the best way to praise god — is to imitate his character in absolutely every way we can. god’s character is revealed in jesus christ, so my entire person must be christlike. there is not a single sphere of life that the “way” does not touch and transform: as a student, in the academic and social integrity of my pursuits (particularly at notre dame); as a young, 21st-century adult, in my selfless service to people and the planet; as a family member and friend, in my life of love for all. that’s all quite nice sounding. but how could this look over the next three years? the application loving others months ago i wrote this sentence: “my conviction is to see each person return to the god in whose image and likeness they are made” (“victory over death” by , integration three — moreau fye week eight). this is a borderless, boundary-breaking vision that embraces others the same way god does. it underlies the call to compassion from the famous priest gustavo gutiérrez: not only do we “suffer for the other,” but we also are “in sympathy with one another” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg — moreau fye week nine). it courses in the mission of the gang intervention organization homeboy industries and the touching words of its founder, fr. greg boyle: in embracing boundless compassion, we “find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location… god’s own jurisdiction” (“jurisdiction,” https://www.google.com/books/edition/reflections_on_the_psalms/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kkgowdwp4tpvcqwv0y2axlhclbxaorgf4va9pute7y0/edit?usp=sharing https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=acts+9%3a2%2c+acts+19%3a9%2c+acts+19%3a23&version=nrsv https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ctoz87sm1wqskzz1h1dhvue5i7tg9yw2/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=102206514466583979933&rtpof=true&sd=true https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30 daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 3 from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. — moreau fye week seven). it matches the logic of the good news about jesus — that since god loves us so much that he destroys our sin and transforms us into his children, we ought to love others with the same devotion and care (1 john 4:11). in my four years here i will find people at all different levels of social, mental, and spiritual well-being. i will find people whom i love greatly; i will find those whom i struggle to love. i might be difficult to love — not just by others, and even by myself. but the love of god empowers me through and through. it is a relief that i won’t have to rely on myself or only on other people to help me commit to the love i know to be true — god is the assurance, the perpetual source. his love is our model. it is his love that we know first. if i hold fast to the promise he gives in christ — that nothing can separate us from that love — then i will receive the strength i need to love others, love the unloving, and love myself. i think i have begun this well this year, but i am humbled to know that there is much more to grow into. i hope the fact that most people guess that i’m majoring in theology (“week five irishcompass activity” — moreau fye week five), means i have fulfilled this call well so far. this is the kind of impression i hope people will receive no matter where i am and what i am doing. i do not know the shape of my career, but i hope that these two principles flow into it in every part: to love god and to love others as i love myself. relying on others one of the things that make standing on principle difficult is that sometimes we simply do not know what to do. we don’t always know what the better option is. sometimes the conflict is not between doing the right and difficult thing versus the wrong and easy thing, but which one is even the correct way. in cases like this, my faith is indispensable. god is my source and my refuge at all times, but especially when i find it most difficult to see him or speak with him. i would do well to not forget that sometimes the very method of god’s help is through other people, though. those friends, mentors, and colleagues are not substitutes for god; they were likely sent by him. many of them are my spiritual family members — not “strangers and sojourners,” but “members of the household of god” — a home that breaks the boundaries of this world (“epistle to the ephesians” by the apostle paul — moreau fye week ten). these people will someday be closer than i am to anyone i know here. to take candidly their concern, their advice, and their companionship is one key way i accept the helping hand of god. psychologist tasha eurich says “a good rule of thumb, then, is that why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich — moreau fye week six). i think the fundamental principle behind this is that no one can see themselves. we need mirrors. sometimes other people act as those mirrors — we can assess things more clearly when taking an objective distance. but the same might be true within us: we are too close to our own struggles and our own thoughts to know precisely what is going on https://www.google.com/books/edition/tattoos_on_the_heart/ooz8ke9w89qc?hl=en&gbpv=2 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://ebible.org/pdf/eng-web/eng-web_eph.pdf https://ebible.org/pdf/eng-web/eng-web_eph.pdf ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 4 or how we might move forward in it. in helping others see, we may help ourselves be seen better. it is mutual. we must rely on friends, colleagues, mentors, professors, rectors, clergy, counselors — whomever else will stand and look at us with the honesty, compassion, and directness that help us heal and see. career vision i am firmly committed to the idea that calling transcends career. but this does not mean calling opposes or mutually excludes career; it means calling defines career. the next three years will help me better define the general focus of my career (such as a particular field), but i don’t think they will determine the rest of my life. i think that they will instead develop in me the aptitudes appropriate for a range of careers centered around humanitarianism, diplomatic service, investigative work, and perhaps even education. our own ucs says “planning for your career is much like planning for a trip,” so i think it is healthy to view my career plans as a general road map for a journey that could take detours, accrue additional stops, and wind up somewhere i did not even know of ahead of time (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services — moreau fye week four). i still find it difficult to conceive of myself spending a lifetime in one particular discipline. it’s not only that i grew up with many different career intentions throughout my childhood — many people are like that. it’s that i still want to pursue some of those careers, even the ones that do not really interact with one another. it seems in one way like the “restlessness” that fr. michael himes spoke of in his article. as an impelling force, a gravity toward our ultimate desire, restlessness can be seen as “the best thing about us” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes, moreau fye week three). on the spiritual level, i think restlessness is an encouraging guarantee of sorts: we may not have our greatest desire fulfilled, but that’s because what fulfills it is yet to come. at the career level, however, this is a bit more mixed. i think there are helpful and unhelpful things about this restlessness in my career. i will consistently learn and apply my aptitudes across disciplines in inventive and beneficial ways, but i may also find myself always pursuing the next thing, never feeling quite settled in my work. it will be my challenge over the next few years to attenuate this restlessness without losing my desire to serve the world in many capacities. i think i also ought to remember that careers are not necessarily adventures. they are engaging, pragmatic, difficult, fulfilling, and at times fun; my vision should complement all of those factors, not just the last one. courageous wisdom | wise courage courageous wisdom: the wisdom to know when one should be courageous and when one should be cautious. wise courage: acknowledging what is right and what is wrong when it is uneasy or uncomfortable to do so. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 5 the two spill into one another, so i’ve included them both for my final set of thoughts. fr. ted hesburgh had given advice that we should “serve our country, put our country before party and before politics, and always do the right thing” (“hesburgh,” a film by jerry barca & christine o’malley — moreau fye week two). i think in upholding fr. murray’s writings on religious freedom despite the opposition of the vatican, fr. ted committed to the final item in the list above all. his defense stands the test of time: today the catholic church forges on with dignitatis humanae, a treatise on religious liberty headlined and inspired by fr. murray’s work. this is the prime example of putting principle above power, party, and politics. this is an inspiration for my work over the next three years and beyond: i may have to stand for something unpopular or forego support for something popular because of my deeper conviction that it is the right thing to do. doing so is difficult — especially if it is my loved ones who disagree — but if it is right, it is right. the key is to not ignore the voice of my companions. principle is easy to confuse with dogmatism. principle demands careful, wizened courage: the willingness to recognize my wrong and the desire to do right, no matter what. i must be attentive to whether or not i’m acting in candor or being ignorant or arrogant of others’ advice. this might be a bit of a stretch, honestly, but i think it also takes courage to accept the proposal that susan blum, laura carlson, maria mckenna, and hugh page put forth for the previous provost’s “moment to see, courage to act” symposium. it is radical, exciting, and quite deeply intimidating. their “new educational model” promises several key changes to the current school system: • “a school-within-a-school built on principles of progressive, student-directed education” in which students apply with a “proposed problem” and are “guided to amass the skills necessary to address this problem” with a two-year “cohort of [likeminded] fellows” and a faculty guide. • students enroll in just seven courses and are given funds to “pay consultants, travel, purchase materials, or whatever they deem necessary” (with approval from the guide). • students finally “emerge with portfolios and projects demonstrating the robustness of their learning, and with confidence in themselves as learners” (“a new educational model beyond the course at notre dame” by susan blum, laura carlson, maria mckenna, & hugh page — moreau fye week twelve). what a proposal! let’s stop for a moment and parse this. (in fact, take a break as well— it’s been a long reflection already. maybe drink some water. water is underrated.) difficult, but delightful. work, but worth it. i want education to look like this. it’s almost anarchical in comparison with the state of higher learning over the past few centuries. it makes the university a society of like-minded and like-hearted individuals seeking wisdom together across disciplines, which i believe is closer to the vision of plato’s academy or the medieval universities. (those places often did not have a campus at all.) if they were to institute some form of this at notre https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/ daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 6 dame, i think i would be among the first in line. it would be a leap of faith, no question: i have no idea how well i would succeed in this version of higher education compared to what we have now, and i might not have many chances to branch out and take random, interesting classes. (for example, i decided to take a wood sculpturing class with a couple of my friends next fall, even though i don’t need the credits and it meets for six hours a week.) but i know that i would be more personally invested in everything i’m doing. few people could use such an educational track as a student whose two majors are interdisciplinary and globally oriented. being silent i think briefly discussing silence is a good way to close things out. each of us is a story, a song of god’s continuing composition. pico iyer, a british essayist and traveler, helped me understand the role of silence by showing what role it has in music: “it is the rest in a piece that gives music its resonance or shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico ayer – moreau fye week one). it is not merely that silence for its own sake is good — silence enhances everything it surrounds. as i put it in my first qqc this semester: “when the sound returns, it has a greater definition, a sharper contrast, a clearer identity — it becomes more itself because it has ‘waited.’” there’s one peculiar way i’ve been able to institute silence as a fairly regular part of my day. i usually eat breakfast at south dining hall, and as it’s the least populated time of day and most people are hurrying off to classes, there aren’t many people to sit and talk with like one might during lunch and dinner. without anyone to share breakfast with, i (like most people) resort to using my phone in some capacity. i might doomsurf on twitter, listen to a podcast, check emails, watch highlights — anything to make my breakfast time interesting. at the beginning of the semester, i began to intentionally keep my phone away. i noticed two things once this began: first, it’s surprisingly difficult to avoid using your phone in any way when eating alone; second, almost no one else at sdh does this. it took several weeks for me to stop unconsciously reaching for my phone during the meal, but i began to get used to it about midway through the semester. by this point, i began to notice that almost everyone was either talking with someone or using their phone in some capacity (including just audio). i was often the only one in the entire building (or so it seemed) who was just… eating food. this hit me kind of hard. at what point did i forget that breakfast time is for “breaking my fast?” for eating? i had relegated the food — the reason i was in this building at all and not jogging off to debart — to a secondary role. i was really there to catch the news or soccer match i missed yesterday or check up on my email and message my friends, and also eat. sometimes this cliché is so overworn that it does not even properly register, but that is because we’ve needed to be told it so many times: some people have nothing like what we have. i may complain all i wish about south dining hall’s scrambled eggs, but at the end of the day, i leave the building sated and ready for what’s ahead. it is so startlingly simple that i do not often give enough thanks for it. i ate today. i ate just a few hours before turning this paper in. and i fully expect to eat tonight, tomorrow, and all the foreseeable future. does this not merit true-hearted thanks? ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 7 i said before that enjoyment is entering into the fullness of god, and that perfect praise is perfectly imitating him. i think that by intentionally eating in this slow and silent way, i am living out that exact same picture. i may “praise” in a sense (using words to thank god before eating), but the true “praise” is the way i receive the food (embracing what i am given). and i now know i am truly grateful for the food i received today. it all makes me feel a bit childlike. i think i’m on the right track. daniel, theophilus moreau fye capstone integration 8 bibliography thomas ken’s doxology reflections on the psalms, c.s. lewis (1958) “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico ayer – moreau fye week one “hesburgh,” a film by jerry barca & christine o’malley — moreau fye week two “three key questions” by fr. michael himes — moreau fye week three “navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services — moreau fye week four “week five irishcompass activity” — moreau fye week five “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tashua eurich — moreau fye week six “jurisdiction,” from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. — moreau fye week seven “victory over death” by , integration three — moreau fye week eight “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg — moreau fye week nine “epistle to the ephesians” by the apostle paul — moreau fye week ten “passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain — moreau fye week eleven “a new educational model beyond the course at notre dame” by susan blum, laura carlson, maria mckenna, & hugh page — moreau fye week twelve “mission statement” by — moreau fye week thirteen https://christianhistoryinstitute.org/magazine/article/where-did-we-get-the-doxology https://www.google.com/books/edition/reflections_on_the_psalms/ ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.google.com/books/edition/tattoos_on_the_heart/ooz8ke9w89qc?hl=en&gbpv=2 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ctoz87sm1wqskzz1h1dhvue5i7tg9yw2/edit?usp=sharing&ouid=102206514466583979933&rtpof=true&sd=true https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30 https://ebible.org/pdf/eng-web/eng-web_eph.pdf https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kkgowdwp4tpvcqwv0y2axlhclbxaorgf4va9pute7y0/edit?usp=sharing a life of praise why praise? the application loving others relying on others career vision courageous wisdom | wise courage being silent bibliography integration one: the power of faith faith. a five letter word which oxford dictionary defines as “complete trust or confidence in someone or something.” faith often is associated with religion, however, it is not confined to just religion. one can have faith in a multitude of things, such as a football team, a studying routine, or even something as simple as an apple. having faith means having complete, unshakeable belief in something or someone. throughout my first eight weeks in my moreau first year experience class, i have seen faith as a recurring theme throughout the videos and learned that faith is an essential part of becoming successful as a person, student, or friend. thus, i believe that faith is an integral part of finding success and growing as a human being. in brene brown’s ted talk, “the power of vulnerability,” she emphasized the impact of being vulnerable: you are able to live a more fulfilling life “(“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week 1). vulnerability is essential to success. i have experienced vulnerability time and time again at notre dame. being a natural introvert, the first weeks were especially challenging for me: i failed to connect, i overthought my actions, and i missed out on fun. however, i began to have faith in myself, and faith that being vulnerable would work, and i now have an established friend group and feel better connected. by having faith in vulnerability, i was able to overcome my fear of reaching out. religious faith plays a large role in my life, and notre dame’s as well. as demonstrated in david brown’s ted talk, “should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” he states that “nothing worth doing can be achieved in our lifetime.” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2) although unintended, this quote comments on spiritual faith. in the christian religion, the end-goal is eternal life in heaven with jesus. however, this can only be achieved through faith in the gospel and faith in jesus’s message. just like david brown’s quote, living for heaven is worth more than anything that can be lived for on this earth. on the note of faith, father david fagerberg states that “faith is a transformed mind,” and i agree wholeheartedly.(“faith brings light to a dark world” by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week 3) faith is one of my root beliefs, and having faith in something, especially jesus, revolutionizes the way you view the world. one of the main reasons i chose notre dame over other colleges was their emphasis on faith. i have seen faith play a large role in my college experience, which is why i am choosing to write about it. having faith in your friends allows for a deeper connection and relationship. in the week 4 video, “the three d’s of being an active bystander,” the people emphasized the steps necessary to protect someone from harm. “direct, delegate, and distract,” is the message of the video ("it's on us ndthe three d's of being an active bystander" moreau fye week 4). however, not being just a bystander takes a lot of courage. it takes a lot of faith in yourself to stand out and protect someone. by stepping out and protecting someone, you may lose friends, but you will gain deep friends. if friends can have the faith in you to protect them in time of need, they will support you unconditionally and you will have forged a true friendship. father sorin comments on unconditional faith in his letter to father basil moreau. he states to “fear nothing, except losing confidence in god.” (letter to bl. basil moreau by father sorin moreau fye week 5) confidence in god is faith. therefore, father moreau is stating to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://bit.ly/2mwcxs4 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1qk5ii7hctyydsb3xyzs5hnclj-uo5hq4/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28199/files/192743?wrap=1 have faith in god, because that is the most important thing. in his struggles and early years founding the university of notre, there must have been many times his faith was compromised. however, it appears that one of father sorin’s root beliefs was also faith, which allowed him to keep his mind centered on his task before him. similarly, there have been instances where my faith has too been challenged. for example, college involves a drastic shift in routines. i no longer have a bathroom in my room or a bed placed on the floor. i have to shift my daily routine drastically. it was extremely difficult for me to say goodbye to a routine and living setting that i had complete trust and comfort in. i have to have faith in myself, my new routine, and even my roommate to continue to thrive. for example, i have faith in my roommate to wake me up if i sleep through my alarm, and he has the same faith in me. it is little things like this that have been challenged and confirmed throughout my journey at notre dame. i have not done anything as big as founding a university, as father sorin did, but just like him, my faith has been challenged and strengthened. along with the new adjustments to college life, i have had to say goodbye to where i came from. as george ella lyon demonstrated so well in his poem, “where i’m from,” it is not the large things that we come from, but the little details that define us ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). thus, when we move on from these little details, we often miss them. for me, i have missed many aspects of where i am from. i miss my bed, my parents, my dog, my siblings, my midnight pizzas, my friends, my creaky sink, my tiny shower, and more. the little things that make up who i am, i no longer have. this is extremely tough, but, like father sorin, we must not fear anything except lack of faith. going to sunday mass has been extremely helpful for me, as connecting with god weekly allows me to reevaluate my faith and work on it. the little details, like my creaky sink, make me and also my perspective. perspective is extremely important when evaluating relationships and bias. in scientific american’s article, “how to think about implicit bias,” i was enlightened on the various ways humans can be implicitly biased ( "how to think about 'implicit bias'" by keith payne, laura niemi, and john m. doris, scientific american moreau fye week 7). it is extremely important to recognize this fault in oneself and be introspective, as bias can be harmful to various people in varying degrees. the question i asked in my qqc was about finding a solution to implicit bias. upon deep thought, i think that faith is the solution. sure, maybe we cannot be perfect, however, having a deep, spiritual faith in some religion (christianity, in my instance), allows me to cleanse my soul and help others. in my religion, jesus was an example of a perfect human, so by following him to the fullest of my capabilities, i believe i will be able to limit my implicit bias to a greater extent. ultimately, faith plays a large role in my life and i was able to see how faith played a role in each and every weekly topic. faith is my strongest root belief and without it i would not be who i am today. http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-to-think-about-implicit-bias/ integration three 4 march 2022 reflecting on a short but sweet life well-lived when celebrating jack’s life, we should not look ahead at the emptiness now left, but instead, look back at the fulness he strived to achieve. there are certain guiding principles, inspirations, if you will, that he chose to live his life by. one of those is the drive to help others. for example, back in his hometown community, he was involved with projects like holocaust awareness, volunteering at local pet rescue shelters, and beach cleanups. when he got to school, he tried to continue his initiative by participating in fundraising for the south bend center for the homeless. he always referenced this line from the hesburgh film, “i think we can help this person” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). this idea demonstrated the priority and commitment he had placed on the importance of the need to help others. while he was still fully getting adjusted to school, he always talked about wanting to become more involved with the south bend community as he became more familiar with it. he was becoming more integrated with his dorm, which hosted these kinds of opportunities, and vowed that next year he would take advantage of them. one of the most important skills jack had come to realize was the ability to self-reflect. in his moreau class, more specifically, the “ways to practice mindfulness” activity (mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week 6), they were given the chance to try and use different techniques to accomplish this. he tried headspace for the first time and began to realize the power this could have. reflection, not only on the past few days but also on a larger scale, allowed him to take a step back and understand what is important to him. this new perspective allowed him to overcome challenges throughout the day that previously had given him great https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view trouble. this is further reinforced by the idea that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). schedules at college can be very busy. whether it be balancing classes, homework, internships, social life, or clubs, there is always something to be doing. in the midst of all this, taking a step back, a break, and doing nothing (or the mediation techniques previously mentioned), has allowed him to practice healthy habits and maintain a higher standard of mental health. moving forward, he was planning on practicing this more consistently, aiming to start taking a break and meditating at the start of every week on monday. he believed that this would help provide a calm contrast to the hecticness of the start to a busy week. jack wanted his future career to be integrated into the pursuit of a happy life, not hinder it. he had always gravitated toward more logic and number-based fields, so the discovery of finance felt natural. at notre dame, there are a significant amount of resources to aid in career discernment, but the biggest help to him was a very informal one. through conversations and help from upperclassmen who had more experience, he was able to get on track starting his freshman year and begin the process. “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). this idea is crucial and cannot be understated. using all of your available resources to get the most out of your career is something that he has come to learn is essential. he wanted to become more active in networks such as irishcomapss and linkedin, while also using other resources the career center offers moving forward. however, a career is not only about professional success. rather, it is also about finding a deep sense of contentment. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). this supports the central idea behind jack’s career discernment. he wanted to do something that would also bring him joy as he realized a career without it would not lead to a life well-lived. while this is easy to say, it was not an easy process to identify which career choice would bring lasting joy. he began this process by personally thinking of what brought him joy; it was things like helping others and making a difference. next, he identified what he was good at logic and number-based fields. in order to obtain a different perspective, he had conversations with those close to him, with those who knew him very well. he asked them questions like, “what do you think i most value and desire in life? why?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). through this process, his ideas were largely affirmed, with some personality traits, such as drive and commitment, being reinforced. after this, he was sure that he wanted to enter a field that would allow him the opportunity for great professional and personal success. “how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). here, it is said that innovation that leads to a growing economy should also lead to a benefit in social change. this further supports his ideas of both professional and personal growth. it is important to look back at the opportunities notre dame has given in terms of developing both of these aspects. for example, the business honors program. what makes this program distinct from others is the focus on using business as a force for good. whether he was able to make it https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript into this program or not, he planned on taking these honors business classes to further instill a higher sense of purpose in his work. overall, while jack had only lived and given a small amount of what he was capable of, he had learned so much and made the most of the opportunities given to him. word count: 1084 integration three matsumoto 1 professor espeseth moreau 3/4/2022 the legacy of “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). my sister, hannah truly embodied this principle by living every day with the end in mind. i remember talking to her one day about the idea of death for her honors seminar final discussion. she was asked to reflect on how to give people dignity in their death. she was truly struck by the idea that every day that we live ultimately shapes our death. this had a wide impact on how she approached her relationships and how she treated others. while she was in no way perfect, hannah treated others with respect and love which led to lifelong friendships. her emphasis on creating lasting relationships was reflected in this one quote she heard by pope francis, “[w]e can only build a future by standing together and including everybody” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i think this really informed her interest in international health care and the numerous medical trips to ghana and kenya she made with our mom. each time she would come back feeling empowered to make a change for people in need. i think that she always felt that these underserved individuals should have a voice and be given access to basic healthcare. had she not passed, i think hannah would have joined doctors without borders and made even wider changes. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript matsumoto 2 her values were also incredibly important to her. i remember calling her one week after her weekly moreau and she told me about a figure they learned about, father hesburgh. “this was someone who was totally committed to his country, to his faith, and to what was right” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). the considerable impact that he had on notre dame shaped her experience at the school. father hesburgh’s dedication impacted the way that notre dame students felt connected to each other and the school. these values impacted many of the classes that she took her freshman year where they looked at many past philosophers. i think that through these readings hannah was able to develop her own set of values through discussions with her fellow classmates. while she often complained about these courses, through these authentic conversations and relationships, she fostered her love of learning in a different way. however things weren’t always positive for hannah, she also went through a lot of hardships in her first year of college. i once read that, “stress will be the epidemic of the twenty-first century” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this was really well reflected in my sister’s premed experience. often she would stay up till 4 am writing essays, doing homework, and studying to keep up with her classmates. i think this often fostered feelings of inadequacy and caused her to constantly compare herself to those around her. what really got her through these intense times of stress were the deep friendships that she formed with her roommates and friends. these girls were a good support system and really helped her through the big changes that occurred with the adjustment to college. her brother was a congenital amputee and in elementary school, there were young children who would make fun of his arm. we would often watch ted talks together about people with disabilities who have overcome these challenges. in one of these ted talks, the man https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ matsumoto 3 states, “[t]he purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering from god” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). i think this had a considerable impact on her relationship with god. often when faced with hardship i think hannah would turn to god and ask for him to make the troubles go away. however, one cannot be great without adversity and these challenges often made her stronger. over time, hannah learned how to respond to these situations by following god’s example and responding to the issue with a virtuous mindset. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau family center for career development moreau fye week four). hannah was very experience-oriented and would emphasize having memorable times with her friends and family. we traveled every year to a new country and each time, we would spend the entire time laughing. these were some of our favorite moments of our childhood and formed her love of traveling. we had very limited opportunities to all see each other every year and these were the moments that really bonded us all together. i think each of us(her siblings) taught her how to mature in different ways and shaped her in different ways. these moments shaped how family-oriented we all were, and i think hannah would have wanted to instill this value in her children when she got older. “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor” (“week five dsicernment conversation activity” moreau activity moreau fye week five). hannah was constantly developing her own opinion. i think especially during high school and college many of her ideas were challenged and adjusted, but the main thing that she focused on was improving herself every day. i think that this is at the end of it all the best that we can do. forming relationships, attempting to improve, and creating long-lasting memories that we can look back and be proud https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit matsumoto 4 of. i truly hope that hannah was proud of these moments in the end and would be able to look back with fondness and love for the legacy that she created. name: course: moreau first year experience, fys 10102-106 instructor: prof. catherine wagner date: april 22, 2022 capstone integration prompt: how do i pursue a life well-lived? title: rising by lifting others guide to living a fulfilling life personal mission statement: to live a fulfilling life by being a force for good and a light to others, in a way that every aspect of my personality and identity serves as a guide and inspiration to aid them in finding their purpose, realizing their dreams, and living a life well-lived. this i believe, will help me leave my footprints on the soil of time and thumbprints on the pages of life. i will achieve this mission firstly by involving god in all i do. also, by working diligently towards self-development across various dimensions, and finally, by setting smart (specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound) goals and working conscientiously to achieve them (dikko, personal mission statement). a few weeks ago, i wrote a letter to my younger self. in that letter, i talked about what a life well lived entails and shared my definition of leading and living a fulfilling life, a meaning i arrived at this semester. i defined a life well-lived to my younger self as “one that involves leveraging one’s knowledge, talents, skills, opportunities, and resources to be a force for good by striving to create a positive impact on those around them” (dikko, integration three). impact! that’s the word i want to focus mainly in this capstone reflection as i articulate the plan i have developed for pursuing a life well-lived. as highlighted in my mission statement, creating impact, and transforming the lives of individuals and communities is the core goal i would love to achieve. recently, i have been pondering what success would look like when it comes to this. what metrics would i be using to hold myself accountable? during my reflection, i recalled some wise words i heard sometime at an event this semester. the speaker explained that there are two types of success – vertical and horizontal. vertical success, he explained, is when an individual focuses his/her/their goals and wins on themselves and themselves alone. after achieving one goal (for themselves), they try to accomplish the next exclusively for themselves, and end up getting stuck in that loop. on the other end, horizontal success entails lifting others as you rise. gauging how much of an impact you are leaving behind even as you continue to excel and achieve your goals. while there is not necessarily an issue with being focused on either, i think it’s best to balance those two kinds of success. that talk made me reflect on the grotto video by dr. kim, the scholar who has a disability, and how he viewed success based on how he helps others learn from “his growth, knowledge, and experiences” (dr. kim). dr. kim seemed to have figured out a way to balance the two success types, and “seeing others not struggle with things he struggled with, after they learned from his experiences, was one way he gauged his impact.” this would be one effective way for me to measure success in my impact creation journey. throughout this semester, i have solidified my understanding of what a life well-lived entail. i have also developed a strategy to aid me in my journey toward living a fulfilling life. the tactics, in summary, includes the following six steps – believing, reflection, mentorship, exploration, planning, and action. firstly, i must believe that i am capable of living a fulfilling life and achieving greatness. this is the foundation of it all, and once that belief is solidified, it will forever help me eradicate self-doubt and gain the confidence to act when needed. just like dean marcus cole's family gave him a reason to survive and overcome the obstacles he faced during the unjust pullover encounter (cole), having a solid set in place will be an inspiration i can always rely on to continue moving forward and not give up in my journey of pursuing a life well-lived. the next step is to reflect. pico iyer, in his article "why we need to slow down our lives," pinpointed the "need for a pause, and how it helps gives more life and shape to whatever we are doing" (iyer). in my pursuit of living a fulfilling life, i must continually take a moment or two to reflect on my previous approaches, thinking about what went well and identifying areas for improvement. dr. blaschko advised in the big questions video, where he explained the difference between "the bubble" and an "echo chamber" that "we must learn to be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to" (dr. blashko). one way to improve intentionality is through reflection. reflecting on previous experiences will help me vividly identify critical influences that have fueled positives and negatives in my life. this practice will help me make better decisions in the future. reflection will sincerely help me in developing weaknesses and converting them into strengths. for instance, some conversations about racism turn out to be complicated. dr. robin d'angelo, in his text, explained that factors like "segregation, entitlement to racial comfort, arrogance, and many others, are some reasons why it is hard to have conversations on that matter with some individuals" (d'angelo). therefore, one needs to be well prepared going into such difficult conversations. i sometimes shy away from those kinds of conversations when they become super-heated or tough. through reflection, i can analyze previous experiences and work on a more practical approach to handling such situations if they occur, developing my conflict management skills and selfawareness. the power of mentorship lies in the fact that some people out there have been through experiences similar to whatever i am going through. whether to not they managed to win their individual battles, they for sure have lessons from their navigation of the situation and experiences with overcoming challenges they faced along the way, which will guide me in the right direction towards achieving my goals and even surpassing them. therefore, the next step in my strategy list is mentorship. i am super grateful for my mentors and even more thankful for their invaluable advice and guidance. during my major discernment process earlier this semester for instance, i decided to answer father himes's "three key questions," one of which asked, "is this vocation/ role/ profession/ way of life that you are considering something you are good at?" (father himes). in finding an accurate answer to the question, i integrated the help of my mentors, and they helped me vividly see that the career path i am currently on is a perfect fit for me. there are many ways others can mentor us. one of my personal favorites has been through books. for instance, father ted hesburgh is one of the influential figures whose legacy and leadership style i respect and admire. father jenkins, the current president of the university of notre dame, when talking about father hesburgh's life in the hesburgh film, said, "he could talk across differences; created trust, created mutual understanding. that's the kind of leader we need today. it is the kind of leader father ted was" (father jenkins). by studying his works, i can learn more about father ted's life and his journey towards creating the impacts he made. as i continue to grow as a change-maker and leader, i will try to engage more with materials that talk about leaders that embody specific leadership traits that i want to develop and deliberately try to learn from them. this leads me to my next step in pursuing a fulfilling life – exploration. exploration comes in various forms and dimensions and can mean many different things. it is essential in helping us make the best decisions. we can explore the lives of others who have lived a well-lived life like father ted. we can explore our skill sets and passions and many more. the “navigating your career journey” text by the meruelo family center for career development explained that “exploration helps us learn more about ourselves” (meruelo). i found this to be true this semester, as i explored different career possibilities during my discernment process. also, in completing the irish compass activity, i explored several careers and industries, connected with alumni working in sectors i am interested in, and learned about opportunities in those fields (irish compass activity). through that process, i learned a lot about my interests, skills, and talent and decided to double major in a dual degree program, contrary to the initial plans i had before the discernment. exploration will help me identify new areas and opportunities for growth as i go on my journey of living a life well-lived. finally, i need to take action to achieve the goals i have set out to accomplish. this is one of the most important, and maybe most difficult, step in the strategy list. i came across some wise words that basically explained that if we do find it challenging to act or get stuck in the process of taking action, we should not be hesitant to ask for help. sometimes, the tasks we must accomplish are not things we have to do alone, which is why relationships are a vital aspect of a life well-lived. asking for help requires humility, which is very important to anyone who seeks to make transformational impacts. in a ted talk, pope frances said, “tenderness is not weakness, it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility. the more powerful you are, the more your actions will have an impact on people, the more responsible you are to act humbly” (pope francis). this goes both ways; just as we sometimes need others to walk with us in our journey, we must also learn to be beside others. in describing accompaniment, professor steve reifenberg explained that “it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied; in the same way, someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship” (reifenberg). therefore, we should always be willing to accompany others in their pursuit of a life well-lived, even as we strive to achieve ours. works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one. “hesburgh” video – produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two. “three key questions” by father micheal himes – moreau fye three. “navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four “irish compass activity” – moreau fye week five. “5 minutes,” video by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six. “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven “moreau integration three” by – moreau fye week eight. “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye nine. “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” – dr. robin d’angelo – moreau week ten. “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd – moreau fye week eleven. “i am george floyd. except i can breathe” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve. “personal mission statement activity” by – moreau fye week thirteen. capstone integration abigail moore moreau fye erik oswald april 20, 2022 critical, questioning, wonderful i want to be a whole person. by which i mean i am seeking to cultivate myself towards balanced excellence. however vague that may seem, i think my path must involve a continual education of mind, body, and soul. in order to commit to such an education, i will need to maintain a demeanor which critically assesses myself and circumstances, seeks out questions and challenges, and perseveres in wonder. critical analysis is key to understanding the world and my place in it and precipitates informed action: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer week 1). as the center for career development advises, determining a life path off of that sight is “a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development week 4). adapting to and driving forward this developmental process requires a desire for conflict, challenge, and uncomfortable inquiry. a willingness to question and change also feeds into maintaining a state of wonder. joy in the path that follows is a result of a consistent admiration for the inexplicable, the beautiful, the true. keeping this joy or wonder is often difficult when matched with the highly critical attitude also described above, which is why balance is so important. if i let analytical criticism devolve into cynicism then i lose the crucial wonderment. the warning of a close friend reflects that danger: “if you keep thinking of yourself a certain way, you’ll probably stay that certain way” (conversation with lily, february 6, 2022, week 5). when that thinking is negative, it can lock me in a personhood that is neither true to myself, balanced, or holistic. critical introspection can become a vice when we “spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich week 6). if you allow it to stop growth, stop your path of deepening inquiry, then you become complacent. sister theresa aletheia noble combats potential complacency or potentially negative feedback loops of self-perception with the phrase memento mori because “‘remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful’” (sister theresa aletheia noble in “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” week 3). i must refuse to be derailed by negative criticism while continuing to promote a critical attitude that spurs growth and development. an awake, focused, and ready self results from a commitment to change and cultivation in the face of inevitable death or even inevitable inadequacies and failures. on the other side of death is a complementary outlook on life that also helps to balance criticism and wonder. pope francis states that “life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis week 7). being conscious of the limited time we have and recognizing that time as a gift both contribute to a state of wonder at the world around us and keeps the critical vision from becoming cynical. rather than bogging me down in a “certain way,” wonder, inquiry, and critical thinking can be used together to sponsor action and development. although i came into college with the decided major of architecture and a fairly clear route to a career, i have been wrestling with what it means to compliment or enrich this straight-shooting path with all the opportunities available at notre dame. ideally, choosing a minor or concentration would further my goal of a whole self. however, determining what that means and what path towards achieving that is sustainable has been much harder than i imagined. steve reifenberg offers that “maybe sustainability is, in part, to do whatever it takes … and walking together, working together, discovering the path, a path that will be sustained over time” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg week 9). keeping that open and adaptable mindset with respect to my ultimate goals of a balanced education led me to go back and forth between minors. at first out of practicality, i applied to the real estate minor and was accepted, but couldn’t shake the feeling that i was just seeking out another skill, much like architecture. would acquiring helpful financial tools to promote my future career or monetary success necessarily craft the person i want to be? i kept searching. strangely enough i discovered what is called the “philosophy, religion, and literature (prl)” minor in my digging, and it struck me in a way the real estate minor had not. the prl minor would balance my design and math heavy curriculum and keep me asking questions in a breadth of fields. although it seems odd that i had to get the real estate minor to recognize that it ultimately wasn’t going to foster the education or self i desire, this is an essential part of developing a path and refining what it looks like to live out my goals. i expect that i will understand this process to a greater degree as i proceed through my years at notre dame. just in this first year with what i’ve met in my classes, i have only realized all the more that “we all ought to be protesting against many of the things we see in modern life” and that an education at a catholic university necessarily involves defining these ‘oughts’ (hesburgh week 2). i hope that by cultivating a holistic self i will be better equipped to meet these responsibilities even when, or especially when, such a perspective goes against cultural norms. “eitan hersh makes the case that many americans engage in politics in the same way that sports fans engage with their teams, as a form of entertainment and self-expression,” but i think notre dame asks a deeper, more purposeful engagement in changing the world for the better (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media week 11 ). although i’ve never before considered myself a political person—it’s never been one of my “hobbies” as hersh would say—my first year at notre dame has challenged me to ask what i can do to impact my community and even my nation. before i never would have thought anything i did really affected either. classes like my social science usem and intro to ethics and politics have raised important issues about race, climate, inclusion, and human dignity that likely will inform how i act here at notre dame and beyond. thankfully i am not facing these issues and calls to action alone but at a school that professes to “prize the uniqueness of all persons,” a model i hope to follow (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame week 10). by the end of my time at notre dame i want to have cultivated “those disciplined habits of mind, body, and spirit that characterize educated, skilled, and free human beings” (“mission statement” by university of notre dame week 13). i believe this will come to be if i seek balance in my education so that as a well-rounded individual i can know, address, and act on issues that are important to our community and my future communities. by complementing my architecture degree with deep-thinking courses in philosophy, literature, and religion, i have already begun to foster a more holistic self. if i continue to cultivate my mind, body, and soul through critical analysis, curious inquiry, and wondering eyes, perhaps i will eventually “have the competence to see and the courage to act” as notre dame challenges me to be a force for good (“mission 2” from the congregation of the holy cross week 12). professor chan moreau fye integration 29 april 2022 broadening my map a life without mission is like a journey with no map, leaving a person wandering, aimlessly moving through their life while ignoring much of what makes them human. this absence can cause them to feel lost, as if they were “standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded changing with every microsecond” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week 1). however, by creating a statement, setting goals towards it, and committing to their mission each and every day, people can find the way towards a life well-lived. in terms of my own life, this mission statement has become clear throughout the past eight months, although it had been almost nonexistent prior to my time at notre dame. i was placed on this earth in order to make an impact, a human person who may not be perfect, but by “seeking to live life full of love, gratitude, hard work, and an enthusiasm for this life on earth,” i can create a life in which i accomplish everything i’ve been placed here to do, and live my best life (mission statement – moreau fye week 13). the first , and most important, aspect of my life and mission takes one focus: love. from a young age, i’ve been extremely lucky to be surrounded by love; my parents are amazing examples of love for one another and for me, and i have so many examples of what love looks like both in my family and in many of my role models. this idea of love is transformative, especially when looked at through the lense of a life well-lived. “we discover our true selves in love” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" (fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart) – moreau fye week 7). love for another exposes the greatest parts of our selves, allowing us to be the people we are most designed for. often, we try to find this through introspection, through an emphasis on self-awareness. yet, “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences,” whereas using love to understand who we are and why we’re here allows us to better understand and utilize the best parts of our lives (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) – moreau fye week 6). thus, the idea of love in one’s mission takes center stage, as both the most critical and most useful aspect of a life well-lived. even before realizing the substance of my mission statement, it seems as though i was able to succeed in creating it. while talking to my parents many weeks ago, my dad described his observations that when “situations get chaotic, i seem to become more productive, calmer, and more focused on the tasks at hand” (discernment reflection – moreau fye week 5). i have been able to, for longer than i knew, find a way to work hard in every situation, especially the most difficult. this work ethic is critical to success in life, which is a very important aspect of my mission. however, this success is a difficult idea to realize. often, it comes in many forms, in many fields of study. for this reason, the idea that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” resonates heavily within my mission ("navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) – moreau fye week 4). with an emphasis on hard work, and an enjoyment of my studies, i cannot envision any path other than a successful one in my career and in life. this isn’t to say that i’ll never experience hardship, as “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" (ruth graham, ny times) links to an external site. – moreau fye week 3). however, through this emphasis on hard work, and a gratitude for the blessings i’ve been given throughout my life, even these times of suffering will be reduced, and their effects will be lessened. thus, an emphasis on my mission statement will once again create a life of success, ad one which will be well-lived. an emphasis on love and hard work in life create a life well-lived, without a doubt. however, they are a very narrow outlook on what makes life worth living, and leave holes in my mission statement that needs to be addressed. as a human person , i’m not perfect by any means, and thus far have failed often to succeed in the broader aspects of my mission. whether in “trying to be the voice of the voiceless,” or viewing “a challenge to [my] racial worldview as a challenge to [my] very identity as [a] good, moral person,” my mission statement has not been able to guide my every action or response (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” (professor steve reifenberg) – moreau fye week 9) (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” (dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost) – moreau fye week 10). yet, as i look to the future, there is certainly room for growth. i have felt the necessity to amnd the mission statement i previously set forth, to include an emphasis of respect of others, and to create a tolerance for the opinions and views of those who disagree with me. as dr. martin luther king once stated, oftentimes “men hate each other because they fear each other” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school) – moreau fye week 12). i find it important to alleviate this fear by stepping back, understanding others, and refusing to allow their political, economic, or social views prevent me from seeing their true selves, as it relates back to the love that was so paramount in the original statement. oftentimes, these views drive people apart, but by viewing those with opposing thoughts to mine as “a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction,” i retain this love and respect for them even when we disagree (“passion isn’t enough” (hidden brain media) up to min 11:00 – moreau fye week 11). this amendment to my mission statement has become increasingly necessary in the word of political polarization, but even more so on a campus with so many various views, backgrounds, and circumstances. as i refined my mission statement, looking for a way to include a broader scope of love in order to fully design a life will-lived, i have stumbled upon the words of dr. martin luther king jr. when he declared his dream to the nation, he was outlining his mission, describing to the world that while he may not be perfect, he has a goal to improve the world. this philosophy ensures that regardless of the circumstances, when a person’s life is guided by love, and a commitment to others, any mission statement can be successful. as father hesburgh believed, the key to a life well-lived is more than simply success or a friendliness with those close to you. instead, he believed in and practiced a love and respect for all, building relationships even with those who disagreed or were fundamentally different than he was ("hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) – moreau fye week 2). throughout my life, from this point on, my mission is simple. i will seek to approach life with an emphasis on love and a commitment to hard work, but more importantly, i will approach every single person i meet with an openness and respect for their views and their value as another human person. moreau prof. oswald 4 march 2022 life of jamie “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). we all know we will eventually die. thinking about this and knowing this has allowed me to live my best life because i took risks and had fun. i lived a life full of adventure and reached a very good place. my journey to this place was very difficult but very rewarding. the journey was full of ups and downs, a ton of mistakes both inevitable and stupid, a lot of questions, and fewer answers to these questions. i truly believe not knowing the answers to most of the questions i have helped me to live a simpler and more fulfilling life. people who seem to know the answer to everything seem to still live a well-lived life, but things become less exciting and more predictable. that was one of the favorite things about my life. things were generally never predictable. i lived my life on a day-to-day basis, a simple life. i didn’t let the littles things get to me and i believe that is the main reason i am able to write this a happy man. a simple life can be just as fulfilling as any other life. we as humans do not need much to survive and be happy. a stable income and good relationships, along with the necessities like food and water, can lead to a life well-lived. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico ayermoreau fye week 1). a fulfilling life is very subjective to the individual person. one person can be fulfilled with little money, but all the family and friends in the world. another person can be fulfilled with all the money in the world, but not family or friends. my life has been fulfilling because i did the simple things that gave me the most happiness, which was working for myself, being in a productive and happy relationship, and having a tight knit family. measuring a life well lived can be difficult, but based on my life experience i can definitely say i lived a life well-lived. i can say this because not only did i find happiness doing the things i love most; i was able to give people a better life by helping others. tia b. paulette said, “one of the ways i can give back is by spending my career serving others” (“notre dame alumni association's domer dozen” by tia b. paulette – moreau fye week 2). i believe helping others is one of the best ways to help yourself. even though helping others shouldn’t be for your own gratification, the feeling you receive when doing good for others in unmatched. by helping others, you make very meaningful connections with people and can change people’s life for the better. through one of my companies, i was able to help homeless veterans and people in lower socioeconomic areas find jobs, with rehabilitation, and more. helping so many people gave me a new perspective on life because seeing others happy made me happy. in planning my career, i always thought about something i learned in my freshman year moreau class. i needed to do something that brings me joy, something i’m good at, and something the world needs. finding and planning my career was not easy and took many years and a lot of steps. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau – moreau fye week 4). though it took i lot of steps to get to where i wanted to be, i always found the most success when i followed my heart. this helped me find the work that best suited my interests and the money came after. i learned that the money will come with doing something you love and are passionate about because when doing something you truly care about you will try harder, work harder, and succeed. the meaningful and deep connections i made with my friends and family greatly facilitated living a well-lived life. connecting with others is one of most important things we can do as humans. sharing experiences and stories helps create these relationships. i remember a conversation i had with my old friend andrew pereverzev, who was my best friend in high school. i asked him questions about me as a person and his responses made me very aware that i am always pushing to better myself and people around me (moreau fye week 5). this conversation stuck with me for years because he made me very aware that i wanted to work for myself and he put emphasis that i should do what i makes me happy no matter what. he gave me insight that i might have never gotten while self-reflecting because i always seemed to go in circles in my head, which is pointless and gets me right back to the same place i started. being able to self-reflect in an impactful way takes practice, a lot of self-awareness, and really knowing who you are as a person and who you want to become. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). this is why talking to others to reflect and get insight on yourself is important. people sometimes see things in yourself that you can’t see and can impact your life in many ways. in the end, i am more than happy with the life i lived. i do not think there is much more i could have done besides having billions of dollars, which i now realize has little to no importance. having a good-life is not easy and i am beyond grateful for the lived and for the people i have connected with. one wrong turn or one different decision could have changed altered my life and took me on a different path, but i would never give up what i have done for anything. “i, myself, was born in a family of migrants; my father, my grandparents, like many other italians, left for argentina and met the fate of those who are left with nothing. i could have very well ended up among today's "discarded" people” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). my life was not only fulfilling. i made an impact on other people’s lives and i believe that is my greatest accomplishment. the humanitarian which focused on all but himself here we stand on the grave of pablo raphael casanova pou. pablo was a great person as he always intended to see the best in others and not care much for his benefit. he always did everything in his power in order to not waste his life, whether it was focusing on himself or others and having meaningful experiences which would improve his life. he always asked himself “what life am i living” (moreau fye week 1). he always tried to live his life outside the phone screen in order to pay more attention to detail. “put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives”moreau fye week 1). this means that rather than appreciating the information around us, we just wanted to get it quick on our small screen.”. by paying attention to the outside world he always thought about how he could help others and how he could live a life well lived (moreau fye week 2). he was sometimes compared to hesburgh, but not for his looks and wealth, but for his ability to serve the community. “you are a very attractive man and have a great sense of humor [...] i wonder if being single is not often a distraction by the women you may get who may generally admire you as a person?”. (“hesburgh”moreau fye week 2). hesburgh most of the time did not focus on himself, but helping others. pablo dedicated most of his life to community service and it was great watching him live a life well lived. in order to live this life, pablo had to ask himself many questions. he was inspired by michael himes who said :”is it a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and giftsengages all of your abilitiesand uses them in the fullest way possible?”. (moreau fye week 3). this helped pablo only focus on activities which would bring him happiness, such as his sports, going to the beach, and hanging out with his friends. with this in mind he tried to avoid everything possible which would degrade his life. pablo had the wonderful opportunity to pursue his undergraduate degree at the wonderful university of notre dame in south bend, indiana. there he decided he wanted to pursue a career in medicine and eventually become an orthopedic surgeon specializing in helping children with sports injuries. in order to complete these goals, pablo had to prepare himself for success in order to live a life well lived. (moreau fye week 4). he used the opportunities at the ccd, where they “talk a lot about the “career development process”. what exactly does that mean? essentially this is the process of deciding on a career (or careers) and navigating your journey. it is something you’ll engage in your entire life and you’ve already started. it is a dynamic process with movement back and forth between stages.” (moreau fye week 4). in his development as a person, pablo always loved listening to criticism as others. as much as he loved all the praise and congratulations, the critics are what made him focus on what he needed to improve and forced him to always be the best version of himself. pablo’s friends described him as “competitive” and “always wanting to be successful” which are two traits which he needed to tone down. however they also know about his passion in medicine and his great willingness to help others: “i have always been passionate about working in a career in medicine and have realized that the healthcare system prioritizes people with money. therefore i seek to give the same excellent health care opportunities to all members of society.”. (moreau fye week 5). in order to reach his success, pablo needed to identify what his obstacles were, but he always concluded that his obstacles were himself. he dedicated a lot of time to himself, trying to get to know himself better in order to improve and execute everything to perfection. ​​“similar studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content.” (moreau fye week 6). by removing all the obstacles out of his way, pablo was able to persevere through college, get into medical school and eventually have his dream job as an orthopedic surgeon. even when he reached the top, there were always many obstacles impeding him staying at the top, but he always used many methods to not pay attention to the obstacles, or to eliminate them. one of the greatest methods he used was to use his connections and friendships and allow them to help him succeed. since he was little, pablo was always very charismatic and always tried to make everyone's day, with a simple smile, joke, or hug. this characteristic allowed him to create many meaningful connections which have lasted through a lifetime. even though his friends have changed through his life as he moved to different places due to his education and job, he always tried to maintain contact with all of them. (moreau fye week 7). pablo also did his best to unite all communities separated by different ideals. he said: “if people were to be more open with others, we could eventually unite to become one larger community. a community which was meant to be established long ago. all people of all races, religious groups, socioeconomic classes, political groups and more will all unite to work for the greater good of the world and will have everyone living a better life.” (moreau fye week 7). he thought that by doing this the community would become more knowledgeable and we would be a better world. it is no doubt that pablo made an impact in the life of everyone he met, as he always tried to do the best to make you happy. he will be remembered as a great humanitarian who deeply cares for others and will do his best to see his people happy. we love you pablo and will miss you. ruoyu yan week 8: integration before talking about my eulogy, i want to say that i’ve been learning a lot from week 1-7’s reading materials. when reading the first week’s materials, i remembered the quote “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it” (“why do we need to slow down our lives? ” by pico lyer – moreau fye week one). i have thought about the same thing before. with so much information we are able to receive from our smartphones and laptops nowadays, it is harder to actually absorb information for good use because simply browsing through them takes all of our mental capacity. therefore, it is crucial to pause, give our mind a break, and some space to internalize things we learn. from week 2’s readings, i love the quote “the journey to clinical psychology was a deeply personal one for dr. claire conley ’12” (domer dozen web page – moreau fye week two). this simple line is inspirational for me. after reading about domer dozen honorees’ stories, i noticed that a lot of them establish their career path based on their personal experience. so probably the key to achieving success is to explore a personalized path that we are passionate about instead of following what everybody else is doing. and i believe this will lead to not only a successful career, but also to a fulfilling life because then we will be able to seek meaning and happiness from our careers. in week 3, i learned about the definition of joy --“the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (“three key questions” from fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). it inspired me when i was reading the part explaining that joy and happiness are not the same thing because i have been thinking about the same thing lately. we have all heard so many that says “to be happy is the most important in life,” yet i always found it difficult to settle with little doses of mundane happiness in life and i wanted to seek something more lasting and significant. and the answer is joy. we cannot have joy by wanting to be happy all the time, but rather, it is about choosing a right life pat and still having faith in that path we choose even when we experience challenges and defeat. it is certainly not easy, though, to find that path. it takes time, exploration, and a lot of trial-and-errors. as for week 4, i gained knowledge about career discernment. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. think about a recent trip you took.  what did you do to plan for this trip?  what were some of the logistics (lodging, travel, etc.)?  what did you want to see/do on this trip? what did you pack?  how long did this planning process take you? usually planning a trip is not a quick process depending on the nature of the trip but hopefully it’s also a bit fun and rewarding, especially if you end up having a really great time! (career development center web page – moreau fye week four)” i found this quote very inspiring. i had never thought of career-planning as planning for a trip, but it really makes sense. this metaphor takes a lot of pressure from me. planning trip is a daunting work because it requires so much research and decision-making, but every time we put effort into planning for a trip, a trip would turn out great and it would bring so much joy and memories. it is the same with good career planning --it requires a lot of work but it will certainly lead to a satisfying life. in week 5, i learned about the role others play in my career/life discernment. i found networking to be very useful in discerning our career path. as suggested in this week’s material (“discerning a life well-lived irish compass activity” – moreau fye week 5), the purpose of networking is to explore and grow in the knowledge of yourself, others, and ways of living, and it is not just about asking a person for a job or internship. knowing more realistic information from people working in an industry is a great way to examine our interests. i found networking intimidating because people sitting next to us often have so much more experience than us, and i worried about looking too stupid to eager. however, i’m trying to grow a mindset that it is not embarrassing to know less as long as i am there to learn. my politics professor, professor mcadams has encouraged me a lot in networking with people. he was a reverenced leading figure in his field, has been the head of the department for ten more years, and i was not even among the best students in his class. yet he loved to connect me to his former students and introduced me to new opportunities. i learned that there are people who’d love to give you a chance as long as i keep trying and showing an interest to learn. in week 6, i learned that “why” question trap us in our past; “what” question help us create a better future (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). i love this part in the article “the right way to be introspective” about asking “what” instead of “why.” i completely agree this point. i like to ask “why” a lot, always trying to find an explanation for my emotions when i’m not feeling well, but that always turned out to more frustration and self-doubt. the reason is that it is meaningless to try to 100% understand our own emotions as emotions are subtle and intricate. instead, focusing on what to do that might make us feel better could often lead to positive changes. future. last week, i learned from week 7’s materials that “we all need each other. none of us is an island” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” from his holiness pope francis). i love this quote. growing up i came to recognize how much human relationships matter to one’s life, and that a well-lived life cannot be without meaningful connections with other people. however, i often struggle with building meaningful relationships. i think i haven’t mastered the correct method of doing that and therefore i rarely have deep connections with other people. i’m still trying to figure it out by interacting with different people, trying different clubs, and see where and how i can build good relationships and fit into the community. now here is my eulogy, as the last part of the integration essay: “she left something in this world. something great.” basically, i want to leave some legacies in this world, whatever it is. so i hope i will be able to write on my eulogy that i truly leave something great to the world. i die but that legacy persists. peggy hnatusko moreau fye october 15, 2021 belief in the journey college, in many ways, is an end. it’s the end of living at home, the end of going to school with the same people, the end of seeing the same friends every day. i was the only one from my school to attend notre dame and my family recently moved; college was a very finite end to my life in wisconsin. however, college is the first step to a new beginning: life as an adult. it’s a bridge between two definite times in life. as with any transitional period, college also forces us to view our beliefs more critically. after all, our beliefs are what set us apart; beliefs create intangible bonds and differences between people. as i begin the next step in my journey, i evaluate my beliefs and values so that i can find success in my journey. i believe that people are more than an adjective. chimamanda ngozi adichie explains in her tedtalk that often, individuals are remembered and referenced through a single facet of their personality, rather than their entire story ( “danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week 7) . throughout my life, i struggled with the divergence of others’ perception of me and what i thought of myself. people saw me as a think tank, a brain diminished merely to her standardized test score and intellectual successes. like ngozi adichie, i became a single story, defined simply by my academic abilities. i was expected to always outperform with ease, and i felt the pressure to always be perfect. i am so much more than my schoolwork, yet i am always known as “the smart girl.” i believe that we have to look internally to find fulfilment. david brooks reminded us of the difference between adam i, the facet of external success, and adam ii, focused on internal development, and he reiterated the importance of adam ii to the personal journey (“ should you live for your resume or your eulogy ?” by david brooks moreau fye week 2) . i always felt an obligation to be perfect, almost as proof that i was deserving of the pedestal that people placed me on. any academic achievement was never a form of pride; it was merely an expectation. instead, my most memorable moments and achievements came from times of internal growth. i think of my experience with rugby; i was new to the game and wasn’t the best player. i pushed myself to work hard and play to my strengths-being communicative and a positive teammate. when i was named captain, i felt overwhelmed with genuine pride, for i wasn’t working to become captain; it was simply a product of my efforts. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102778 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102778 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102692 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102692 i believe that vulnerability is necessary for growth. we must embrace the uncomfortable to reach our goals. in her tedtalk, dr. brown puts vulnerability at the core of our negative emotions, yet the birthplace of necessary connection ( " the power of vulnerability " by brené brown moreau fye week 1) . like dr. brown, vulnerability is also my greatest struggle. i spent much of my life truly believing that i wasn’t allowed to fail because that’s what people expected of me. in my mind i needed to prove that i was as perfect as everyone believed me to be. i grew to view vulnerability and emotions as a weakness, so i kept my struggles as my burden to bear. i self-isolated my doubts, and i refused to ask for help. however, on the rare occasions where i did open up, i’ve felt bonded to the people who support me. i’ve connected with friends on similar issues, and i feel more confident facing my problems afterwards. i’m realizing that being vulnerable is essential to my growth in both myself and my relationships. i believe that relationships are the cornerstone to support and security. relationships are necessary to personal growth, yet they can also be a hindrance. when relationships, romantic or platonic, become uneven, manipulative, or controlling, they become unhealthy or even toxic. in an article for the grotto, olivia taylor lists friends talking about you behind your back, only hanging out with you when it’s convenient, and not engaging in your interests ( "healthy vs. unhealthy relationships" by the red flag campaign moreau fye week 4) . throughout my life, i have had many unhealthy friendships. there were “friends” that excluded me, talked behind my back, and didn’t support me. throughout these mishaps, i’ve learned what i’m looking for in a friend. i’ve had to let friendships go and truly find who would stick by me, friends who would make me better instead of causing me pain. i believe that we must recognize our journey and growth. drawing inspiration from george ella lyon’s where i’m from poem, i created my own poem relating to my past and influences ( "where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6) . i had to look back and assess the most impactful parts of my life, find what helped to shape me into who i am today. i have had my fair share of hardships, and now, looking back, i’m proud of the growth that came from working through those difficulties. i found that my family had a profound influence on how i solve problems and view the world. oftentimes, i spend too much time looking ahead, and i never stop to realize all that i’ve accomplished. i’m proud not only of my family and my town, but also where i’ve come from personally. i believe that risks and sacrifices are a necessary part of the journey. (fr. sorin letter) in father sorin’s letter, he writes to basil moreau about his journey to found notre dame in south bend. in his letters, he outlined the many hardships he and his followers endured: walking for miles, sleeping on the floor, trekking through cold weather, and much more. father sorin made https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/105070 https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/a/nd.edu/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102760 many sacrifices to found notre dame. he was willing to give up his job and livelihood to build and cultivate notre dame (“ fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” moreau fye week 5). father sorin shows how sacrifices are essential to reaching your goals, and it gives me confidence to take risks in my life. i am unsure of what i want to do after college, and it’s stressful to know that i don’t have a foreseeable plan. father sorin reminds me that taking risks is a normal part of life, and i can still succeed so long as i have faith in myself. i believe that we must have faith, both in ourselves and each other. my entire life, i have struggled with religion and catholicism. i often disagreed with parts of the church, and as i grew older and more analytical, i found myself straying away. i think i surprised my parents by choosing a catholic university. however, father pete spoke of religion in terms of faith. to father pete, faith means hope and patience in the face of adversity. faith means finding the small things in life that you can enjoy, and believing that those things will continue to come ( “ the role of faith in our story ” by fr. pete mccormick, c.s.c. moreau fye week 3) . since being on campus, i have truly enjoyed the immersion of faith, and i have found myself choosing to utilize masses and the grotto frequently. instead of straying further away, i am growing my faith in myself and others. i am choosing to have faith in my future. i do not have my journey planned out. my future is a gaping unknown, an overwhelming reality that i am not perfect; i don’t have an end goal. but i believe in myself. i believe in the journey i have taken thus far, i believe in the support group i have built around me, and i believe in the leap of faith i am taking. i believe that i will keep on growing, and i believe that i will end up exactly where i am supposed to be. true, it’s daunting and full of difficulties, but i am no longer hiding my perceived weakness in order to maintain a distorted view of myself; i am taking a risk and having faith that i will find my own fulfillment. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102707 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/modules/items/102707 ellis_integration three moreau first year experience to the young person waiting to bloom little me, greetings from the future! it’s your 20-year-old self. there’s so much i want to share with you and so much advice i want to give. your life will take a lot of unexpected turns and it won’t always be easy, but it will be brilliant. i wish i could say that i had some great formula for you to use to achieve a life well-lived. i don’t have all the answers, but i do have some advice based on my experience so far. so, here’s some advice on how to lead a life well-lived from your older, “wiser” self: ● take time to rest. since we’re musicians, i’ll share a quote that i think gets this point across nicely: “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). we’re singing debussy’s “beau soir” in chorale right now. it’s a gorgeous piece about taking the time to appreciate life because nothing lasts forever. the song is filled with these beautiful phrases followed by lulls in the piano. life follows that ebb and flow. there are plenty of exciting moments in life, but take time to appreciate the quieter moments too. ● you’re human. it’s okay to make mistakes. i already know this point will give you grief because i know that we’re perfectionists. since i know you’re very focused on getting into notre dame at the moment, i’ll share a quote from father hesburgh. father hesburgh said that “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh by father theodore hesburgh moreau fye week two). i’ll let you in on a secret: you get into notre dame. you achieve your dream. you’re going to make mistakes (and fail a couple math quizzes), but that’s okay! you still succeed because you are passionate and hardworking. remember that you’re human. be kind to yourself. if it makes you feel better, i’m still working on this one quite a bit. one thing i try to remind myself is that every mistake i make is just a setback, not a failure. (although, unfortunately, you will still fail some exams in the future.) remember, mistakes are natural and we are still capable of great things. ● pursue your curiosities. i think this piece of advice will excite you because we’re naturally very curious people. think of it this way, “the only time your vocation is settled is when you are settled (six feet under that is!). look for the ways joy leads you forward. look at the ways joy leads you on to other questions” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). this quote is perhaps a bit morbid, but it’s true. there’s no better time to ask questions and pursue your passions than the present. lean into your curiosity! https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 currently, i’m able to be curious about all sorts of things at notre dame. i get to study biology, which i’ve always loved; but i also get to explore subjects i’ve never heard of before like peace studies. i think it’s safe to say that curiosity remains an important part of our well-lived life. ● try new experiences! this point may scare you a little bit because i know we’re very cautious. there are benefits to being careful, but there are also benefits to diving into the deep end. to continue the pool metaphor, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). you have to commit to the cannonball before you explore the water, so just go for it. i’ve been learning a lot about new experiences here at notre dame. it can be scary, but also super exciting. you’ll see real snowfall for the first time. you’ll take the train and visit a big city. you’ll even take a whole course devoted to exploring life and its meaning. you’ll meet a lot of cool people in that class too! introduce yourself to new people! i’m still trying to work up the courage to do this more, but it’s been great when i have. as it turns out, life can be a lot of fun when you jump into the deep end of the pool! ● cherish your loved ones. i know family is a tricky subject for us. first, i promise you that it gets better. second, try to be grateful for the loved ones you have in your life. i know we aren’t people who take things for granted, but we got really lucky to have so many loved ones. you have so many people who love you. let them love you, and love them in return. at some point, you’ll have a specific conversation with mom that really puts the value of loved ones in perspective for you ( discernment conversation activity with mom moreau fye week five). i don’t want to spoil it for you because it was a very special moment, but that conversation will help you realize how important it is to be loved and supported. that love and support is what makes life worth living. cherish it and share it with others. ● lean into the difficult moments. you’re going to face some major challenges in your future. even as i write this letter, i am struggling with health issues. it’s not fun or easy, but you’ll learn a lot about yourself when you struggle. pay attention to what those challenges teach you. we watched an interview with dr. jihoon kim recently. after dealing with health issues, dr. kim stated that “once i began focusing on what i can do already, it also changed my disadvantage as well” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). the health issues you’ll face are no fun, but you grow a lot from them. a well-lived life is not necessarily defined by always being happy. every moment is a learning opportunity. try to view your struggles as opportunities to grow. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 ● choose compassion. this piece of advice may be the hardest one i’ve given yet. you know better than anyone else that the world can be a cruel place. despite that cruelty, choose compassion. choose to be vulnerable and pick kindness. pope francis explains that “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). choose to be vulnerable and let compassion guide you. some of your most cherished moments will come from acts of solidarity through vulnerability. i promise that it’s worth it. be tender. i know that i’ve just shared a lot of advice with you, but i hope that you take the time to read through it and take it to heart. trust the process; and, most importantly, trust yourself. yours, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript week 8 defining a life well-lived week 8 : defining a life well-lived word count: 1056 carolyn eventually learned how to live a life full of passion and lived it every day following her learning. throughout her early life, especially around the years of elementary school and high school, carolyn struggled with loving herself and realizing that she was all needed and her love was going to be enough for her. she realized that after experiencing trauma and heartbreak in all the senses of the word. following what happened, especially the events in the early summer after her senior year of high school, carolyn was constantly confused and trying to figure out the whys of life and searching for support and love in all the wrong places. towards the end of the summer, carolyn began to realize what pico lyer explained in his ted talk. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer ted moreau fye week 1). carolyn struggled to understand that she only needed her own love to love her life. the beginning of the summer of 2021 completely changed her life. her mindset was at one of the //lowest points it had ever reached. her best friend helped her and stood by her through the entire healing process. a quote from pope francis is similar to the mindset that her best friend bridie was able to instill in her. “each and every one of us is irreplaceable in the eyes of god. through the darkness of today’s conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). bridie was carolyn’s rock and helped her learn to love herself. although carolyn realized that everything she needed was right there with her and in front of her, it still took her a long time to let that concept help her to live her life the way she eventually lived it so passionately. she began to learn that loving herself would lead to a life of fulfillment and therefore a life well-lived. carolyn thought her college decision was going to be very difficult, but it actually was very simple. the second she got accepted into notre dame, she knew that’s where she was going to end up. as displayed through the movie about father hesburgh from the week 2 assignment, carolyn has father hesburgh to thank for being the first reason that she could attend notre dame because he is the reason females were first admitted into notre dame. carolyn knew she wanted to go into the nonprofit sector and after having the experience of working at a thrift store that supported nova, which is a nonprofit that supports victims of sexual abuse by a number of services, including counseling and providing teaching for both victims and non-victims to help prevent sexual abuse and to help people heal from experiences with sexual abuse. father michael himes wrote, “the things we are most comfortable at and the things we are most natural at are often our vocations” (“three key questions” adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). carolyn found that the things she was most comfortable and happiest doing were baking and helping others. she found her passions in the kitchen and while https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/467258?module_item_id=143051 working in the thrift store. she fell in love with the work and being able to support and help victims of sexual abuse and those who share their lives with victims. carolyn was all about doing whatever she could to help and provide for others. notre dame’s career center development believes that “...the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). a major part of carolyn’s self-concept was service to others and connecting with others on deep levels. she loved nothing more than being able to connect with others and being able to bring some form of joy into the lives of others, which is what led her to her career. she started out as a banker to do what she believed was her vocation: to start a nonprofit. her love for baking gave her her most favorite idea when she was just beginning her college career. she dreamed of opening a bakery to satisfy her love of baking. however, her bakery has a twist; it is a nonprofit supporting victims of sexual abuse by helping to provide them legal services or any form of counseling or therapy. one day, while talking to her best friend, bridie told her that a time when bridie saw her at her best and fullest potential was when carolyn was running a clothing drive for that thrift store that she loved so dearly (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). bride had never seen carolyn so passionate and happy about something than when she was putting together the clothing drive and then later sorting through all of the clothes. the women at that thrift store had changed her life, and she wanted to do anything she could to make their lives better and easier. the women who worked there were all much older than carolyn; she was at least 20 years younger than the next youngest employee or volunteer, and she quickly began to view them as older sister/mother figures rather than just simply coworkers. they took her under their wing and made her feel so welcomed and cared about. bridie said she saw a new kind of light in carolyn’s eyes when she started volunteering at the thrift store and forming lasting relationships with the women who worked there and loved her like their own daughter. carolyn then went on to graduate from notre dame and work at a big time investment banking firm. after working on the firm for enough years to make enough money to fulfill her dream. she began her nonprofit and opened the doors to her bakery on her birthday one year. it was the best birthday gift she could have ever hoped for or wanted. she had everything she wanted. she was as happy as can be with her dream job and her little kiddos running around the bakery and engaging with her soon to be loyal customers. seeing how happy carolyn felt with how her life turned out to be proved that she learned how to live a life well-lived and that she did just that. when she was at her lowest, she looked into herself, found herself, put herself back together (with the help of her best friend), and made herself happy by following and accomplishing her dreams. carolyn learned to live out tash eurich’s words, “...what better way is there to increase our self-knowledge than to look inward, to delve deeply into our experiences and emotions, and to understand why we are the way we are?” (the right way to be introspective” by tash eurich moreau fye week 6). carolyn learned how to use her emotions to help her get through things rather than letting them take control of her life. after what was almost too much trauma for carolyn, she learned how to be https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ truly happy and how to live a life well-lived. she learned how to love herself, which led her to be able to love others more and harder because of it, and that’s actually how she wanted to be remembered. mangino_capstoneintegration fys 10102 capstone integration 29 april 2022 moreau capstone integration: engagement and a life well-lived from the experiences that have shaped me into the person i am, i have come to believe that a life well-lived is a life fully engaged in one's surroundings. the word "surroundings" is intentionally vague, because depending on the person it could mean a host of different things. some of us may grow up to take on global issues at a large-scale level. at a place like notre dame, which attracts so many idealists, a lot of people probably come in thinking they're going to change the world. at the same time, though, i don't think a lot of us are truly aware of the problems in this world beyond an abstract understanding. i'll admit i'm probably someone for whom this is the case: i've had a lot of privilege, and i grew up in a place where social issues weren't at the forefront of everyday life. if you were overwhelmed by the injustices of the world, you could just turn off the news. but this is no way to engage with life, by distancing ourselves from the tragedies our neighbors have to endure on a daily basis. we ought to listen to our neighbors. listening to the experiences of people in this community, such as dean g. marcus cole, who writes, "and while i can still see the taillights of the car through that bloody windshield, i know that those men will never have to answer for what they did to us. at least not in this life" makes me realize how little i understand the world i am entering. ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something" by dean g. marcus cole, moreau fye week twelve) we often find it easy to act, but far more difficult to step back and listen. the latter is the key to true solidarity that abandons condescension. "'solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,” he said at the workshop. “this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard.'" ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by professor steve reifenberg, moreau fye week nine) this idea of solidarity is something that every ambitious idealist should adamantly cling to. in a recent speech given for ted, pope francis imagines an ideal world in which "solidarity, this beautiful and, at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic and scientific choices, as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples and countries." ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) this one word may be critical to the change we dream of. but "changing the world" as the idealists define it isn't the only way to make change. there are problems in our communities. there's state, local government, and issues that affect our lives at every level. there are "ways in which [we] can be in communities where people are depending on them, depending on them to get to a meeting, to show up, to move policy in their direction. if they really care about something like climate change, guess what? the regional transportation system in their state might sound boring, but it's pretty important to solving that problem. and they as a citizen by themselves and the group that's organized locally can have a role to play in that…. your country really does need you to do something. and it's not going to be following twitter. it's going to be talking to your neighbors, building a community, getting organized, moving policy, doing what naakh does, trying to get a thousand people to do what you want to do." ("passion isn't enough" by hidden brain media, moreau fye week eleven) when i've reflected on the things i've done to try and get involved in the past, i've found that "the most gratifying things i think i've ever done have always been hands-on service activities.” (7 clues career survey, meruelo ccd moreau fye week four). being able to see the impact of your actions and truly understand their importance is a humbling and gratifying experience that everyone should make an effort to engage with. a life well-lived can take shape at the individual level too. personally, one of my core goals is to avoid any sort of superficiality or shallow judgment in my interactions with others. i've noticed especially since coming here that i tend to shy away from people who are different from me because i'm afraid of awkward interaction. a lot of people here do that, actually. and it's almost worse that this is the case at a catholic university, because such an attitude goes against the way jesus lived. "jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy. the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god." ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by du lac: a guide to student life, moreau fye week ten) it takes courage to break the invisible barriers that exist across our campus. i also think a key element of a life-well lived, perhaps the most important, is the bonds we form with others. i can't explain it much better than i did in my own mission statement: "i aim to be able to change a person’s life. perhaps by forming a bond with someone, a bond that changes their outlook on the world. i want to bring hope to someone. my wish for this life is to give, and not to spend my whole life leeching off of others but to give something in return to those whose kindness i have never deserved." (mission statement by , moreau fye week thirteen) engagement can also mean being aware of the little things around you, the bits and pieces of your everyday life that most people fail to examine past a first glance. it's a common coping mechanism of ours – and a frighteningly easy one at that – to shut everything out at the first taste of discomfort. we can just turn on our phones and bury our heads in the artificial. it seems worth it in the moment, until you realize just how much of your life is being wasted hiding from the real world. the first time i really thought about that, i was terrified. i felt like i was watching time slip like quicksand through my fingers to the bottom of an hourglass. especially as young adults, i think we tend to believe that we're invincible, that nothing can ever happen to us. but our time in this world is limited, and "remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful.” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three) it might take keeping that knowledge of our limited time at the forefront for us to truly appreciate what we have right now. instead of constantly rushing from place to place, preparing for tomorrow, we ought to spend more time reveling in the beauty of today. we all ought to be engaged with ourselves, too; not in a way that makes us self-absorbed, but in a way that encourages growth and helps us to do the most good with the gifts god has given each of us. i often struggle to maintain perspective when i am struggling; i get so wrapped up in what's going on and why things have turned out a certain why and what it means, exactly. this was something we discussed in moreau; we explored the idea that “if you ask why…you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality …. when i feel anything other than peace, i say ‘what’s going on?’; ‘what am i feeling?’; ‘what is the dialogue inside my head?’; ‘what’s another way to see this situation?’ or ‘what can i do to respond better?’” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). what can we make out of our pain? while i hate the idea of romanticizing suffering, there's something to the idea that our pain can help alleviate someone else's. fr. ted hesburgh once remarked that "in my faith, you learn there's meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith, but in the end i found strength…i wanted to help others find their own strength, even in the greatest of suffering." (hesburgh moreau fye week two) we can benefit not only by looking at our flaws but the beauty in our souls, the qualities that make us who we are, the things that bring us joy. in this coming year and hopefully throughout my adulthood, i hope to spend more time with the most fundamental and natural parts of myself, because "the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know." ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) we are meant to be active participants in our lives, not spectators on the sidelines. at one point in moreau, when encouraged to reflect on ourselves, i remarked that a trait i wished to embody was "the ability to rise to the occasion in the face of pressure. if i were able to do that in every situation, i think i could be proud of that at the very least." (moreau fye week five) whether we come to shape national policy, save someone's life, or just recognize the beauty of the world god has created, we must gather the courage to face the discomfort and struggle that comes with truly living. microsoft word capstone integration.docx professor taylor april 2022 a positive impact a day keeps the doctor away notre dame has been one heck of an experience for me throughout this year. i've learned, grown, and matured more than i ever had imagined. throughout this fantastic experience, i've felt the real effects of logotherapy, which frankl tells us "in a man's search for meaning" is that finding purpose is the single driving force in a man's life. this has allowed me to construct a semi-accurate mission statement details, as i still don't entirely know the exact information about my mission because only time can tell that. with this said, i've learned that "it's only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) means, and to take in the larger picture." ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, moreau fye week 1). every day, i have been working harder to impact lives positively. i've done this through emphasizing a new term to me, growing in courage to act, which has shown me theirs's never a wrong time to do the right thing. father hesburgh has helped put a moral image into my head of what this looks like through all of his courageous act such as "father hesburgh said the federal government lacks committed and aggression in carrying out the civil rights movement." (hesburgh video by jerry marca and christine o'malley, moreau fye week 2). another example of father hesburgh displaying part of the mission i want to embark on is "when his stance for social justice caused president richard nixon to demand his resignation from the commission, father hesburgh continued his efforts by founding the center for civil rights at notre dame law school." ("dean g. marcus cole. 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something" by marcus cole, moreau fye week 12.) these examples have shown me some ways to act upon my goal and not just know it. i now have examples to follow and see if i see something morally wrong, to do something about it. pertaining to growing, notre dame's resources have allowed me to blossom into something so much greater than before. relating this to my career, career services have informed me that "studying what you love is a core value of the ccd's it is not something to which we merely pay lip service. there is no "best major" out there but there is a "best major for you" ("navigating your career journey by merulo family center for career development, moreau fye week 4). this has inspired me to work harder in the classroom during my journey at notre dame through having the self-realization that i am passionate about my major. by enjoying classes, i find myself being more successful in the classroom, measured by achieving better grades. this will allow me to dive into a career in the near future that truly interests me. i've also been striving to grow in wisdom through diving into every opportunity that interests me with open arms. in week 11, a quote directly transpired to this, stating, "the thing is that what they're doing is not participating themselves in any active way. they're just following the news" ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). this goes back to my theme that being aware isn't the same as acting. quotes like these have taught me that you need to act upon things to make a difference. in the future, i will learn this insight to help me stand up and work, rather than being in silence because this accomplishes very little. whether a boss is going rogue or a friend needs help, i will strive to act in the best fashion possible. building relationships and memories are other primary tasks of my life. a considerable emphasis of moreau was to embrace humanity to the fullest: the people, the positives, and the negatives. these aspects make relationships and memories that will last a lifetime because you make some of your closest friends and dearest memories in the toughest of times. a quote that captures the need for the unity of humanity from pope francis is, "none of us are an island…and we can only build the future by standing together" ("why only the future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis, moreau fye week 7). this quote goes even deeper than my mission statement, showing me that i will need to work with others to progress humanity in the future. it shows that i will have to accept relationships in the future, which my mission statement shows. "we need to walk together and learn together, and maybe, together, envision and create something better" ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). two people from two entirely different backgrounds are informing us that humanity needs to bond together and make close relationships which is why this was so emphasized in my missions statement. this will be utilized in the next three years at notre dame through socialization and cooperation. another aspect of relationships is my relationship with my faith. in growing closer to god, embracing humanity comes along with it. "christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents, and backgrounds to the community" ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by notre dame, moreau fye week 10). in this quote, it directly connects my mission statement to my journey at notre dame. while i'm at notre dame these next three years, i will take advantage of being at the #1 catholic school in the world and continue growing closer to god. there is no doubt that questions and obstacles come up in life. i've learned how to deal with adversity and will continue dealing with this feeling of uncertainty. i broke my collarbone four times in high school and bounced back even harder every time. "suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the "bright and shiny" is superficial and inauthentic" ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that will you die" by ruth graham, moreau fye week 3). this shows that eventually, you will have an inevitable obstacle in life that you have to face. instead of running from it, embrace it and live to the fullest. i've had lots of trouble discerning this and over the next three years, i plan to set myself up for future success in addition to living in the moment and enjoying the best four years ever at this beautiful university. "after so many years of researching the subject of insight, i've come to believe that the qualities most critical for success in today's world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication, and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness" ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich, moreau fye week 6). although i measure a lot of my success with grades, notre dame has shown me success is more than just academic success, which was an obstacle at first. i overcame this and have become a better person since. i now plan to use emotional intelligence in helping other people deal with obstacles in the future. after so many years of researching the subject of insight, i've believed that the qualities most critical for success in today's world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication, and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness." in week 5, we performed a discernment activity. i had to ask my mom so honest questions that she had great insight into it. hearing my mom telling me things i've done wrong and need to get better at was very upsetting at first, but it proved beneficial. everyone has obstacles, and it's part of our journey to overcome them. my journey at notre dame has been a significant success, and i'm optimistic it will help me carry out my mission in the future. the ups and the downs here have it a rollercoaster of a ride that i wouldn't trade for anything. i look forward to building new relationships, capturing more memories, growing in wisdom and courage, and living life to the fullest in my next years here. my journey has just begun, and i'm excited to see where it takes me. john graney integration introduction. a life well lived. it’s the goal of every person that has ever lived. they want to live a life in which they can look back and be happy with the manner in which it played out. although this is the goal of every person, there is not true answer as to how to live in this idealistic fashion. in this integrative essay, i am going to give my opinion on what a life well lived entails, and run you through the ways that i have lived my life up to this point, and plan on continuing into the future. i am going to break this essay down into three main portions that i believe best suit my answer as to the definition of a life well lived. these sections will include the appreciation of the world around us, the guts to make a change in your life, and opening ourselves up to new possibilities. section i: appreciation in our never ending, continually moving world that we live in today, i cannot stress enough the importance of taking a step back from everything to appreciate the world around us. this may seem like an easy task— just go to your room and relax. although that may have be an adequate solution thirty years ago, it is no longer the case. the chaos stays with us, it follows us in our backpacks and in our pockets as we move throughout the day. what is this pocket sized chaos? technology. in week one we read an article by pico iyer which speaks about the fast paced society that has been created by technology. he states that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones;” (“why we need to slow our lives down” by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). when i read this quote i couldn't believe the relation that i was able to have with it. relaxation has changed so much in recent history that a break for me is going through social media or watching tv. these are not mental breaks. these are merely distractions that further cloud our brains. however, with my laptop being by far the most important tool in my backpack, and my phone being my primary form of communication, getting rid of technology is simply not an option. so what are some solutions? it doesn't have to be some complicated ritual or hour long relaxation period, but just putting your phone away and admiring the world around you on your way to class is an easy way to reset your brain, and pull yourself out of the digital world, back into reality. the second point on appreciation that i would like to surface was brought into my vision in week six this semester with a video of a young man who lost his ability to walk as a result of a freak snowboarding accident. before the accident dr. kim was a young man who dreamed of opening his own sushi restaurant. after the incident; however, that was no longer an option for kim. there were two reactions that this could have had on him. he could have given up, lived off his social security and been upset about the things that he had lost, or he could persevere and strive to better himself and find peace in his situation. i took a quote from this video that summarizes a point of view that we all should try to incorporate into our lives. “we often focus on the things we do not have” (5 minutes by aria swarrmoreau  fye week 6). kim mentioned this point of view to exemplify its unimportance. what is the point of focusing on what we don't have and looking at the life someone else may have? we all need to appreciate the lives that have been given to us by the grace of god, and learn be happy with our lives. nobody has had it harder than dr. kim, and yet he has still found a way to be happy in this world. so why cant we? section ii: making a change. going to notre dame, it is impossible not to know the name hesburgh. but before he was a name on a building, or a face on a wall, father hesburgh was a man of true courage who fought for what he believed in. when watching the hesburgh documentary, it was amazing to see that a former president of our university could have such immense influence on the entire country. to do the things that father hesburgh did may seem like an impossible task, and to many of us it isn't something we would ever dream of doing, and that is okay. however, every single one of us can learn from the courage that he exuded and apply it to our every day lives. a testament to his courage was placed in a quote that i would like to bring into this integrative essay and it states, “if it’s (government) is doing things that invades peoples’ rights or won’t advance human rights, then the civil rights commission ought to speak out and say something.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). to have had the strength to speak out against the government in an era where statements such as this were not said lightly was incredibly brave. now we all need to stand up for the things we believe and stand up for what we deserve now and for the remainder of our lives going forward. section iii: opening up. now that we have gone over the appreciation of the world around us, and the courage to make a difference, the final and probably most important aspect of a life well lived is the ability to open yourself up to the world. opening up to new possibilities is the only way to keep advancing and making ourselves better people. in week four, our focus was on our career and one key peace of advice given in one of the articles was to “ … just get out and experience life! ” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). although the concept seems basic, its importance is not changed. this same message was carried even further by pope francis himself in week 7 when he said that “they (fears of never achieving happiness) can be overcome if we do not lock our door to the outside world ”  (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francismoreau fye week 7). with these two quotations combined as one, getting out and experiencing people, and experiencing the world as a whole are vital components of a happy and successful life. as a child i had a hard time with this concept. i was stubborn and didn’t like to do things that i was not good at immediately. when talking to my father in week 5’s discernment activity, he wanted me to know that it is okay to fail, and that only by failing can i continue to learn and strive towards more success in my future.  this is a very important driving factor in who i am as a person and it will continue to fuel me as i head further into life. conclusion: just like this paper, it is an important thing to remember that we all have conclusions. one day we will all die. this inevitable fact is humbling to our lives as human beings but it is also the very thing that gives our lives’ meaning. without an end in mind, what is the point of a well lived life? in week three we read about a nun who preached the meditation of death regularly. she said that, “the practice of regular meditation on death is a venerable one.”(meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). although this may be extreme for people, it is important to remember that our lives are finite, and that we must live each moment of it to the fullest by appreciating, changing, and opening up in order to obtain the all powerful gift of a life well lived. moreau fysintegration 3 prof. david pruitt moreau fys march 4, 2022 a life well-adjusted we gather here today to celebrate the life of a man whom many of us considered to be a truly great individual, a person who was intelligent and funny yet still down to earth and humble, a person who many of us looked to for inspiration. did everything in his own unique and interesting way, always applying himself and his skillset wherever he could. he even left this world in his own unique and interesting way: attempting to evel knievel a formula one car across the grand canyon in order to raise money for charity. many of the individuals gathered here today would probably state in a heartbeat that this man lived his life well, that “he brought with him a reputation of a values based leader.”1 however, there are a select few among us who have known luke for quite a long time, a period that goes back to when nobody outside of his family would have stated that he was on the path to a life well-lived. in fact, quite the opposite was true. he preached back then that he lived by the same rhetoric that he did in the later years which we all remember him by, yet his lifestyle did not match his words in the slightest. he always took the easy way out of a situation, whether it was choosing to stay at home or in his dorm room instead of going out and building up a meaningful set of relationships or waiting until the last minute to start a major assignment or study materials for an upcoming exam. despite the fact that “[he] want[ed] to feel the pride of [his] own accomplishments”2 and forge a legacy that would distinguish himself from his father and his own achievements, young was probably one of the laziest human beings you could ever meet. all that talent, 2 “week five discernment conversation activity” by todd howardweek 5 1 “hesburgh” by patrick creadon, quote by nancy pelosiweek 2 all those intellectual skills, and yet the place where you would most likely find him would be on his couch playing minecraft. to those of you who are just learning about this side of luke’s life, you are most likely now wondering to yourselves as to where did things switch around so drastically? at what point did luke adjust himself to go off and live his life to the fullest? well, during his freshman year in college, luke’s carefree lifestyle began to catch up to him in the form of missing and late assignments as well as sleeping through some of his classes. these faults had occurred several times before during his highschool years, yet the increasingly unforgiving nature of college academics meant that there were less opportunities to make up for such behavior, and his parents were not going to help him pull through this time. when midterm grades finally made their way to his inbox, luke knew the kind of news he was going to receive, yet he was still unprepared for the way it would make him feel. spring break quickly turned into a complete mental evaluation of the way in which he lived his life, a brainstorm of how to avoid such suffering again in the future. however, the internal conversations led luke to believe and adhere to a simple yet valuable truth, that “suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering.”3 his efforts to avoid suffering had only caused him more, all the while teaching him nothing of value. if he was to avoid suffering going forward, he decided he would paradoxically have to embrace it. and just like that, the old luke was dead and the one we knew and loved was born. college academics soon became a breeze for the gifted young man, with the magical powers of a well-constructed schedule granting him more free time to play video games than he ever could have imagined. yet while listening to people congregate outside of his dorm room on the weekends, he came to realize that the principle of dealing with suffering head on applies to 3 “why does god allow suffering” by dr. jihoon kimweek 6 social situations as well. after all, the only way to know more about yourself is to…just get out and experience life.”4 traditionally an introvert, luke had trouble introducing himself to others on his own accord, always fearing that he would make a fool of himself or appear weird for interjecting himself into someone else’s space. even though those sentiments were still fresh in his head as a freshman, he fought through it, ripping himself out of his mental and physical comfort zones to get to know his fellow notre dame undergraduates. it took some time, yet by the end of freshman year, after many parties and many regrettable decisions, luke was an outgoing individual who could be found livening up a social gathering almost anywhere on campus. he now knew that “the future is made… of encounters, because life flows through our relationships with others.”5 a sense of empathy, a trait which luke had usually sorely lacked due to his shut-in lifestyle, had also begun to increase in him via his now myriad encounters with other college students, slowly transforming him into a reliable shoulder to lean on and a member of several charitable organizations. by the time he graduated notre dame with his management and consulting degree, luke howard was every bit of a model citizen, an outgoing and caring individual who everyone seemed to know and respect. however, just because he had changed significantly did not mean that his goal of achieving success and creating his own legacy was no longer present. if anything, the desire had become stronger over the course of his college career, and now, as a result of his life adjustments, he had the necessary skill set to capitalize on that desire. i will not bore you with the details of what happened from then on. we have all heard the story a thousand times by now, some of us even experiencing it firsthand, of how luke’s invention of the autonomous frisbee revolutionized the very way in which we live our lives, yet i would still like to mention 5 “the future you” by pope francisweek 7 4 “navigating your career journeymoreau first experience course” by the undergraduate career servicesweek 4 the attitude with which he went about doing it. such hard work to any normal human being would appear to be the epitome of needless suffering, yet one could clearly see that luke derived a genuine sense of joy from it all. he may not have always seemed happy or upbeat, but one must remember that “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied…it is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you.”6 he also, thanks again to his now legendary planning and scheduling skills, always found the time to take a necessary breather, despite being constantly on the bleeding edge of innovation. my guess as to why he would always set aside time would be that since “the people who seem wisest about the necessity of placing limits on the newest technologies are, often, precisely the ones who helped develop those technologies, which have bulldozed over so many of the limits of old,”7 he realized the importance of a break. without them, he would most likely have never had the impact that he did. i tell you all this not to make this day any harder than it needs to be, but in order that his example may, even in death, continue to inspire each and every single one of you. in his early years, was anything but remarkable, yet life does not have to be defined by your failures and shortcomings. instead, life is defined by how you respond to said failures and shortcomings, how you adjust yourself to live your life well. 7 “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyerweek 1 6 “three key questions” by fr. michael himesweek 3 the lessons of true leadership reflective leadership is a specialized concept to uphold. the idea for this type of leadership requires a certain amount of quiet deliberation to maintain the right type of leadership. my growth into a reflective leader started before notre dame, but i have gained the tools to dial in on the absolute and real meaning of it. utilizing these tools will give me a greater understanding on how to be a good leader and role model, rather than just someone who is a figure head. unironically, a good portion of my last integration assignment was focused on the art of mindfulness. this is something i still hold highly important in the concept of reflective leadership. without the ability to take a moment to think about the ramifications of a decision, a person is only a so-called figure head for the people they are in charge of. as a society we are so fast paced now that people rarely think through their actions fully before completing them, and sadly this is even more true for individuals who lead our world. granted, their fast decision-making may not be entirely their fault because they have their own stressors from a fast-paced world around them. yet the idea of mindfulness requires solitude from that busy world, it requires the ability to think before acting to ensure it is the best decision. as william deresiewicz states, “solitude is the very essence of leadership”. accordingly, the ability to be mindful allows for the growth of wisdom. as discussed in my week 12 reflection, wisdom is derived from experiencing certain events that help us grow. however, the most important aspect of this growth is reflecting on the event. without reflection to truly understand the experience, there is nothing gained from it. the event just becomes another arbitrary experience, but it can be more meaningful with the moments of mindfulness to understand its gravity. paul from philosophy break discusses aristotle and how “we’re actually creatures that are ultimately built for contemplation”. this sums up the blending of wisdom and mindfulness perfectly. aristotle believed in contemplation, and he is known as one of the wisest men to have lived. another aspect that greatly influences reflective leadership is maintaining justice. a part of being a sufficient leader, reflective or not, is maintaining a degree of justice within the group of people. this type of leadership requires a set of convictions and morals that guide a person to ensuring nobody is mistreated. this is a concept that i talked about in my week 11 reflection because it is something i believe is significant. as spoken about before, my brother was bullied a lot in school and i can see how it has affected him even now, 20 years later. also, the point father sandberg mentioned about how it is probable that people who grew up to be leaders of genocide very much could have been bullies that did not face repercussions when they were younger. the mindfulness or reflective part of this leadership is in the morals, if a person cannot determine what their morals are in solitude, then they will have difficulty keeping justice further, another requirement to being a good leader is learning who we are accompanying and who is accompanying us. both roles of this accompaniment are crucial because they both teach us important lessons. as i discussed in week 10, the most significant aspect of both roles is the selflessness that is attached to each. as a person being accompanied, they must be willing to accept the help and guidance from another person, it is a test of humbleness. accordingly, a person who is accompanying another must possess selflessness to assist others in whatever way they need. a leader will fill both roles and learn how the act of selflessness can encompass many different aspects of life. reifenberg states it best with, “accompaniment is about sticking with a task until it's deemed completed, not by the accompagnateur but by the person being accompanied”. he resembles putting others before ourselves with this because it shows that we are not the ones that decide the end of a journey. lastly, a large aspect of reflective leadership that i have learned over the past year is the usage of empathy. in my week nine reflection, i discuss the program i participated in that required not eating for 24 or so hours, but i did not feel that it taught empathy adequately. however, through father sandberg’s commentary on my reflection, i realize that it is not based on the act that tries to teach us empathy but rather how we can digest that information and mold it into wisdom. we may never truly understand another person’s situation unless we experience for ourselves, but i think with a true effort we can try to learn from other experiences. it is crucial we maintain a sense of circumspection because we do not want to overstep boundaries, but we can still learn from other experiences without necessarily walking in their shoes. although the concept of leadership is always growing and can never be complete, this year in moreau has taught me aspects of leadership that i took for granted. these parts of leading seem intuitive but without conscious effort into improving these skills, i would stay stagnant in my growth as a leader. consequently, the best part about being an older student comparatively is that i have a decent number of experiences that i can reflect on. i have been a leader in the navy, albeit probably not the best leader, but it is a memory that i can look back on to analyze how i can become better. as i tend to look back on my past with twinges of regret, i would like to look on it as annie dillard does, “what a pretty pass”. the mountains i have climbed that i mentioned in week 13 will keep teaching me lessons years later, and i will only add to the mountains climbed as time goes on. integration three a life well-lived through a pursuit of joy a life well-lived through a pursuit of joy as i reflect on the life i would like to live, one concept keeps coming to mind: joy. i hope to one day have a life full of joy. to me, joy is happiness and love earned through hard work and dedication. as father michael himes states in his article three key questions, “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied. it is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you—to a new decision and to a new way of living” (moreau fye week three). i want the rest of my life to be full of challenges that push me to be the best version of myself possible. through these challenges, i can find meaning and purpose. i hope to find joy in my personal relationships, my work, my emotional and mental health, and my personal passions over the course of my life. i hope to find joy in the relationships i form with the people around me. when i first told people that i had decided to attend notre dame, there was one common response i kept on hearing from past alumni: “the people there are unlike any people you will ever meet.” i’ll admit, i was a bit skeptical of this claim. what is it about notre dame that attracts such amazing people that people keep telling me about? i figured good people could be found at any university across the world. while this is indeed true, within the first couple weeks of my freshman year, i was blown away by the types of people i was meeting. i found myself surrounded by such kind, giving, and thoughtful people. for the first time in my life, i was opening up to people in ways i had never imagined because they truly inspired me to be the best version of myself. by the first month, i had already found an incredible group of people to call my friends. the relationships we formed are what has given me so much joy and purpose at notre dame. i noticed this especially during the week 5 discernment activity. after talking with one of my close friends here at notre dame, i was blown away by how well she knew me and how important her insight was to me. through the friendships and connections i have formed during my first year of notre dame, i have realized that what brings my life meaning and purpose is my connection to my loved ones. to me, a life well-lived is one shared with others. this is well-represented in the pope’s tedtalk, “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” in the video, he explains, “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). i completely agree with this sentiment. seeking out the help of my friends shows my strengths, not my weaknesses. the more time i spend with my friends and the more i lean on the people around me, the more capable and confident i become. my friends uplift me and teach me how to be the best version of myself possible. i also hope to discover joy through the work that i one day will take on. i have many academic passions, ranging from gender studies to physics. though i’m not currently sure which pathway i want to start on, the article navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course helped me understand that fulfilling work should align with my skills, values, and personality (moreau fye week four). as long as i center those topics during my discernment of what i want my future to look like, i can form a fulfilling relationship with my work. maybe i will become a physicist, or perhaps a gender studies professor. no matter what, i will find work i believe in and dedicate myself to it fully, finding joy in my work and practice. i also have to remember the importance of taking care of my mental and emotional well-being. i am currently working on emphasizing the importance of self-care in my life. i tend to push myself too hard and force myself to work without breaks, leading to a vicious cycle of stress and burnout. as pico iyer explains in their article why we need to slow down our lives, “yet it’s precisely those who are https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/472856?module_item_id=146947 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break”(moreau fye week one). my current way of life isn’t healthy or sustainable. if i want to live a life full of joy, i need to change my habits and treat myself with greater care. in a similar mindset, i want to ground the rest of my life in gratitude. my senior year of high school was incredibly difficult for me. the state of my mental and emotional being made it hard for me to see much of the positive in anything. i’ll admit, gratitude was far from my mind. but during my first semester at notre dame, i started feeling better. meeting new people who saw the person i was and welcomed me with open arms helped me get through a difficult time. for the first time since the covid-19 pandemic, at notre dame, i was truly happy with the person i was. so, to honor the struggles i went through and all that i experienced, i began to practice small moments of gratitude while i was walking to class everyday. dr. jihoon kim has a somewhat similar perspective as described in the short film 5 minutes. “so as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already,” he recounts, “i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope” (moreau fye week six). though i am not religious, spending a few moments each day reflecting on the struggles i have experienced and what i am grateful for has helped me feel calm and at peace. it has filled me with love and hope. finally, i desire to find joy through my personal passions and convictions that i develop throughout my life. as i grow older and gain more life experience, i hope to become more confident in sharing and standing up for my opinions. speaking my mind has been something i have struggled with. though i am very outgoing and confident with my friends, when i am among people i don’t know very well, i may have difficulties in speaking up and using my voice. i have causes that i am very passionate about, but i’m not always sure how to use my voice to help those causes or how i can make a difference. i believe i can learn from the example of father ted hesburgh in my pursuit of this goal. the documentary “hesburgh” addresses the impact of father ted’s life. “he complained that with every civil rights decision he made, father hesburgh was always around the corner to say, you aren’t doing enough” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). like father ted, i hope to develop my personal confidence over my years at notre dame so that one day, i can use my voice to fight for change. by advocating for the causes i believe in, i can work to make our world a more equitable place and find joy in that pursuit. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/auth/login.aspx?instance=okta&auth=viewer&returnurl=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 how we should live our lives vol 2 how we should live our lives by: throughout this semester, i have learned so much about college and myself. this semester has been an uphill climb for me, but i can’t help but feel as if it will help me in my future endeavors. my mission in life is to live every day to the fullest and not take anything for granted. father time is slowly catching up with me, and i can’t outrun him forever. i have learned a lot more about myself and the world around me. i believe god has tested me and put me through the gauntlet this semester. reflecting on it now, i can’t help but feel blessed and thankful for the adversity god has brought before me. i am grateful that god protected me even in danger. i learned that i am stronger and tougher than i could’ve ever imagined this semester. i am the biggest believer in hope, and i have found it. my mission for the rest of my time at notre dame, as well as for the rest of my life, is to be a power of good within this world. someday i would like to share the wisdom i have collected within my short time at notre dame. this wisdom is learned through experiencing hardship and suffering. someday i would like to leave my mark on this world, my footprint. i believe that love always beats hate and shall always be the most powerful driving force. lastly, the keys to living a life well-lived, in my opinion, are, love what you do and those around you, enjoy the small moments and simple joys in life, last but not least is, to live every day like your last because it very well may be. the first step in pursuing a life well lived is finding balance within our lives by balancing what we do in our free time. according to pico lyer, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape”(why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyermoreau fye week one). in today’s society, we are constantly looking for the new thing, a new way to entertain ourselves when we need to be more reflective in our free time or at least if you need to do something, go and talk to others instead of sitting on a device. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the second step in pursuing a life well lived is being an instrument of change. the concept of fighting for what you believe in gives life substance. at this university, we have had many great alumni and university leaders who have gone out into the world and done great things in the name of change. for example, father hesburgh is the greatest example of fighting for what you believe in. father hesburgh was once quoted as saying, “whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living.” (father hesburghmoreau fye week two). this quote embodies the true definition of living a life well-lived. along with fighting for change in the world, one needs to fight for equality for all people, no matter gender, race, or religion. you have to live life with courage, “we will return fathers and mothers to their sons and daughters, particularly when their only “crime” was to be born the wrong color.” (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. by dean g. marcus cole-moreau fye week twelve). building upon the idea of a religious figure comes to an idea from a nun. sister alethia is a former atheist who converted to catholicism and brought along some very interesting methods of thought. she is quoted as saying, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time…we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you by ruth graham-moreau fye week three). i agree with sister alethia and the point she is trying to get across. she wants you to acknowledge the fact that you are going to die, and the sooner you do, the faster you can get living. i know that may sound contradictory, but the idea goes along with my mission statement, father time is chasing after us, and the only way to avoid be caught is living every day to the fullest. the next step in living a life well-lived is to be adventurous and have a spirit of exploration. considering that, i have learned that, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”.(navigating your career journey-moreau https://hesburgh.nd.edu/fr-teds-life/an-extraordinary-life/in-his-own-words/hesburgh-quotes/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ fye week four). being adventurous doesn’t mean just going random places and finding things. being adventurous means stepping out of your comfort zone and doing things you wouldn’t normally do. for example, this semester, i was being adventurous by making it a goal of mine to meet and introduce myself to at least one person everyday. doing so helped me develop new friendships and gives life a sense of adventure. something i often find myself reminiscing about is god and religion. i believe that religion gives life purpose and meaning. i believe that i have “in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love. we have wandered into god’s own jurisdiction” (tattoos on the heart by father greg boylemoreau week seven). as well as being religious and spiritual, i believe one has to look in before they can look for a higher being. being introspective is a key component of religion and living a life well-lived. there are good ways and bad ways to be introspective. bad ways can hurt our minds and negatively impact our well-being. ”introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich phd-moreau fye week six). to do this is to take a leap into the idea of pursuing a life well-lived. to find happiness in life, you need friendship. you need a group of people you can rely on when you are down. you need someone to accompany you in every step of your journey, “to accompany someone is to go somewhere 2 with him or her, to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an end. there's an element of mystery, of openness, of trust, in accompaniment.”(teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine).for example, my friend junior and i are very close and always have discussions to build on our friendship and what we can do personally to be better people. (moreau fye week five). in the idea of friendship comes the concept of wisdom. to be wise means being skeptical and knowing what is real and what is fake. “championing the https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ benefits of extreme exercise when some members start to express concern that the group is developing unhealthy norms.” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week eleven). in conclusion, i like to think my mission statement and layout for living a life well lived goes along with a part of notre dame’s mission statement that being “the university of notre dame strives for a spirit of inclusion among the members of this community for distinct reasons articulated in our christian tradition. we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.” (the spirit of inclusion at notre damemoreau fye week ten). i have laid out the steps to live a life well lived within this text. every day i am constantly pursuing happiness which one can not obtain but within the pursuit is where happiness lies. continuing with my mission statement, i like to reflect on my eulogy, which embodies who i am as a person, that being “there are many small moments in life that the majority of those take for granted. was not one of those people. every day was a new mission and a new goal for him. he never took the small moments for granted. joey was always present, and that was his greatest gift from god.” ( the life of moreau fye week eight). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ april 15, 2022 moreau sincerely, me. for the rest of my time at notre dame, i will always strive to improve myself and bring happiness to the lives of both my closest friends and complete strangers. but most importantly, i will live every day like it’s the best day of the year and never take for granted a single person or moment, no matter what happens. in the beginning of the year, i wrote down my root beliefs as: i believe that loving myself is the first step to loving others, i believe that everyone should smile at each other a little more, and i believe that every person is a unique gift. then, after a year of exploration, i came to define a life well lived as a life characterized by spreading positivity and taking risks. i hope to live by the encapsulation of these ideas for the next three years and the rest of my life, while also remembering to enjoy the process of working towards these goals. it’s important to pursue my passions and a life well lived, but in the past i have had a tendency to focus on the next thing i want to accomplish instead of enjoying the present. notre dame and its people are so special, and i want to appreciate all of the time i get to spend here. for most of my life, i always spent a lot of time doing things for other people: i got good grades and worked towards getting into a good college to make my parents proud, i drove around everywhere to be a good sibling, i went to social gatherings and stayed up late on facetime calls to make my friends happy, and i spent hours, days, and weeks volunteering to help the people in my community. it’s not that i didn’t want to do all of these things—a lot of them i actually enjoyed—it’s just that i always forgot to prioritize myself. i always thought that as soon as i finished the next thing or accomplished the next goal, then i could take time to rest, figure out who i am, or do fun things solely for myself. however, when i stood on the stage at my high school graduation with the title of valedictorian and an acceptance to notre dame, and somehow still felt semi-empty inside, i realized that it doesn’t really work like that. in week 1 of moreau, we read an article by pico iyer, who stated, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i agree with this statement and learned that prioritizing time for myself to relax and reflect actually helps me to be a better daughter, sister, friend, and community member. in addition, being able to reflect helps me to grow as a person and think about who i am and who i want to be. we talked a lot about career discernment in week 4 of moreau and the quote i picked out was, “there is no ‘best major’ out there, but there is a ‘best major for you’” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). in college, when i began prioritizing myself, i noticed all of the things that made me really inspired and passionate, and decided that i would never choose a major, career, or life path for anyone but myself. i came to college as just a biology major, but after realizing that i can study anything i'm really interested in, i also became a psychology major. although there are so many benefits from taking time to rest and focus on myself, it can be hard because sometimes i can’t help but think that i should be working harder. when there is a test or assignment that i don’t do as well on as i had hoped, a lot of times i feel like the result would have been different if i had just studied for that extra hour or read the textbook a little bit longer. however, i always have to remind myself in these times that i can’t control what has already happened, the result probably wouldn’t have been different, and that “failing” is completely okay sometimes. in the hesburgh documentary, father hesburgh affirms, “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). it’s really easy to feel like i am alone in my failures, but in reality, everyone experiences them. life doesn’t always go as planned, and that’s the beauty of it; recently i've been learning to appreciate the bad as well as the good. finally, in jacob walsh’s story with his experience being gay and catholic, he shares, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). i don’t think i’ve ever experienced an internal conflict this large, but i can definitely relate to the feeling of not knowing who you are and sometimes wanting to be someone else. i found that taking time to myself, however, allowed me to figure out my strengths and weaknesses, accept my failures, and truly grow to love who i am. after all, in my life i will have to spend the most time with myself, and the only way that i can love other people is if i love myself first. after making time for myself, i will always work to spread positivity, love, and friendship to the people around me. one of the best parts about going to a school as big as notre dame is that my circle of friends never has to end! forming close relationships with people is one of the most essential parts of my well being and happiness because they add things to my life that sometimes i’m not even aware of. in week five of moreau, we did a discernment activity where i asked a close friend, “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). sometimes our friends know us better than we know ourselves, and it’s really important to have conversations like this in order to help us to realize our strengths and weaknesses and grow from these realizations. i learned a lot from talking with my friend about how he perceives me, and i realized that friends can give amazing advice when i need to make tough decisions because they know what makes me happy and sad. additionally, making friends is important because it is my friends who always pick me up during the worst moments and help me to see the good. in week 3 of moreau, sister aletheia reminded me, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). during this past semester, i’ve had a lot of tough things happen in my personal life and in my friendships. these trying times not only made my friendships stronger but also made me even more grateful to have the friends that i do. when bad things happen, it gives people, including myself, an opportunity to do better, which becomes a light in the darkness. because it is extremely important to me to form close friendships with the people around me, i think it is important to try to bring as much happiness and value to their lives as they bring to mine. being a good friend is easy sometimes and difficult other times, but is something that i will always prioritize. in week 6 of moreau, i was very inspired by dr. kim’s story and took to heart his motto “to focus on what we can do for others instead of what we cannot do and what we have not done yet” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). the times that i find it hardest to be a good friend is when i am stressed out about my own life, but dr. kim inspired me to use these moments as an opportunity for selflessness. the biggest part of being a good friend comes from wanting to do things for others; i will never take for granted these moments when i get to give love, support, and advice to the people around me. finally, friendship can be applied to all walks of life, including people who aren’t just my peers. in writing about accompaniment, steve reifenberg remarks, “i’ll go with you and support you on your journey wherever it leads; i’ll share your fate for a while. and by ‘a while,’ i don’t mean a little while” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i experienced accompaniment when volunteering and working with children in both my community back at home and in south bend. i was actually able to learn so much more from being their friend than they probably learned from me, and i think it’s really important to reach out and form friendships with people who aren’t directly in the circle that i normally interact with. thus, the last part of my mission is to improve the lives of all of the anonymous people whom i may never get to befriend in person, but who i still have the opportunity of sharing earth with at this moment in the infinite timeline of the universe. with so many people from different backgrounds and cultures, it can sometimes be hard to understand the way all of these unique people live their lives. in his article about healing racism, dean cole quotes martin luther king when he says, “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). in addition, in week 11 of moreau, we learned that “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko and thinknd moreau fye week 11). taking inspiration from both of these quotes, i want to always lead my life with an open mind and listen to others’ stories so that i might become more understanding. everyone has their own beliefs and i don’t always have to agree with other people’s, but that doesn’t mean i shouldn’t respect their opinion and further educate myself about where they are coming from. additionally, i think that listening, understanding, and compromising is the first step towards igniting change in many areas. and, as dean cole said, i hope to always work to ignite change and make a difference because i, unlike many others, have the privilege of attending notre dame which will give me the tools and resources to truly do something about many of the problems our world faces. working to understand different cultures, backgrounds, and beliefs will allow me to connect more deeply with others so that i might be able to become a better person. in fact, at notre dame, i have already learned so just from having deep and honest conversations with people who grew up differently from me. i realized that these people who were once strangers in a totally different part of the world as me are actually not that different from me, despite maybe having opposing sets of beliefs, values, or upbringings. in week 7 of moreau, pope francis described the phenomenon that “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). in biology, we learn how everything is connected; from simple chemical compounds to large organ systems, all of the different parts work together perfectly to produce the miracle that life is. it is in this same way that humans can and should interact, and i believe that it is important to work towards a future in which all unique people are included in our connections. finally, with all of this in mind, i think i can answer the question i found most daunting in writing my mission statement, “what does it mean to act with courage?” (“writing a personal mission statement activity moreau fye week 13). acting with courage is setting out on my own unique path that will take the things that i find inherent joy in doing and use them to connect with people and better the world. i live to love other people, but i also live for myself and all the things that i love. therefore, during the rest of my years at notre dame, i will study the things that actually make me excited to do school and be proud of my successes as well as learn from my failures. i will expand my circle of friends, always try to make others smile, be a good friend, and enjoy every moment that i get to spend here with the people i love. i will continue to volunteer and reach out to befriend people not in the notre dame bubble, so that i might learn about different life experiences and grow with them. i will challenge my beliefs in pursuit of the truth and promote actions of empathy, integrity, and acceptance towards all people. and finally, i will act with courage in following what i love most (all of the above) and always trying to do better. moreau capstone integration 2.0 led by love, not by fear one of the fundamental truths i’ve learned about people is that they always want what they think is best for themselves, but they are not always willing to put in the work to get it. for instance, i think everyone wants to be able to look back on their life and confidently say that they lived it well. yet, our daily experiences make it clear that many people are not willing to go through the discomfort that must precede growth and do what is necessary to achieve that good life. as someone who greatly values silence, i believe we can blame part of this on the fact that our society very rarely allows individuals time to think about what this would look like. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones…” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) during my first year of college, i found that moreau helped create space in my life for that pause to think about my life. granted, it can be scary to embrace this pause, especially when “... research suggests that self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves.” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six) while these unsavory results seem to disincentivize the type of self-reflection we went through in our moreau classes, i believe it is simply a matter of learning how to engage with the empty space effectively because “... it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week three) one of the biggest lessons i have learned about living a good life this year is that the best lives do not allow themselves to be limited by fear. (at the very least, they minimize the constraining effects that fear can have on an individual’s decisions.) this truth can be seen on a grander scale when we ask the question, “has there ever been a good society built on fear?” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two) i do not believe that any good entity, ranging from an individual’s life to the existence of a nation, has its roots in fear. as such, i think the rest of my life, or at least the next three years during my time at notre dame, will be something of an exercise in learning to overcome fear. after all, “the only https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 way to know more about yourself is to test the waters…” ("navigating your career journey" by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four) as i step out of my comfort zone for the sake of growth, i will be guided by the principles laid out in the following revised mission statement: it is my goal in life to leave all the spaces i enter better than i found them. i believe the most tried and true way to achieve this is by structuring my life around the teachings of the catholic church and focusing on becoming a force of love through accompanying others down life’s roads. i hope to prioritize relationships as the key qualifier of a life well-lived and to expend the best of myself in this area. i desire to treat every person i meet with love, especially through the lens of dignity, compassion, and support, while learning to accept that it is reasonable and good for others to help me in the ways that i try to help them. i hope that whatever work i undertake will serve to improve our collective life and leave an impactful legacy and example for others to follow. in all that i do, i aim to achieve my ends through honorable means, to view obstacles as an opportunity for growth, and to embody agape, or unconditional, love. while this is a nice, abstract standard for living my life, it seems to me that the value of most things is seen in the concrete, observable effects of any entity on the world around it. with that in mind, i decided to ask myself the following question, in order to ensure that these ideals are applied on a practical as well as theoretical level: “what three things can you do to make the world a better place?” ("dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'" by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve) i think the answer, both for the short and long term, lies in the ways i will handle relationships, mission, and legacy. from a memento mori lens, it seems that the best lives are also defined by quality relationships as well as overcoming fear. relationships have an incredible power to bring out the best in us and encourage us to improve, as i was reminded in my discernment conversation with my dad. (discernment conversation activity – moreau fye week 5)* it is my goal to always place my relationships with god and others as the focal point of my life. as a committed catholic, my goal is always to act in agape love, so https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ that others can always see christ through me, even to the extent of thinking “she is jesus in an apron.” ("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven) i thought that the accompaniment method we talked about was a beautiful way of going about this, especially since it emphasizes that the actor also needs help, which is something i often struggle to remember. “this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied — to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment.” ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine) furthermore, i have always been a strong believer in mission, especially thanks to my identity as a catholic. i believe we each have a duty to try to impact the world in some way and that how we want to do that provides some much needed direction for our lives. it seems that those who go through the motions without a higher goal, “they’re not trying to move anyone. they’re not trying to empower anything. they’re really just trying… to engage in a pretty frivolous way.” ("passion isn't enough" by hidden brain – moreau fye week eleven) finally, i believe that having a life full of meaningful relationships and directed by mission leads to an individual leaving behind a legacy for others to uphold and an example for them to follow. just as notre dame and the moreau course helped me determine what i want my legacy to look like, i believe that it will help me create it. this school offers me the opportunity to cultivate relationships that will last a lifetime. it offers me space to determine my mission and the tools to achieve it. it provides countless opportunities to overcome my fears and to become the person i want to be, and for that i am grateful. i know it will not always be easy. in fact, times fraught with obstacles will probably be the ones that prove the hardest to continue fighting for that life well-lived. however, i hope that i will always remember that god does not love me “in spite of” my obstacles, but that “he was using… [them] to reach me with his love.” ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh – moreau fye week ten) at the end of the day, it will be this love that helps me live life well. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 *i don’t have a hyperlink or specific quote from this activity, so i hope this suffices for integrating content from week five. moreau fye prioritizing what matters as a maturing young adult and student at the university of notre dame, i have recently encountered many new experiences that have changed and shaped the way that i view the world. throughout my first year of studies, i have learned to equate success with something much less tangible than grades or class rank. i now label success in academics as pushing myself to do my best work, exploring things that i am passionate about, and learning from the failures that i encounter. i have also found that feeling successful does not always come from an academic standpoint. creating deep, meaningful connections with those around me, as well as allowing others to help expand my understanding of the world, have been integral to my success at notre dame. because i have only spent about 9 months in this new community, i must accept that the changes i have seen in myself so far will not be the only ones to come about throughout my time here. however, i know that the transformation that i have experienced will allow me to be more open to any future obstacles, opportunities, and changes that i will encounter. i will prioritize working to be the best version of myself by keeping in mind my new vision of success and my intention to continue to be open to change (mission statement moreau fye week 13). during my time as a high school student, i was very focused on my future. so much so, in fact, that i often failed to appreciate the opportunities i had to make connections with others and explore my passions. instead, i focused on getting good grades and boosting my resume in order to ensure my future success in college. while i am proud of the work i put into my studies in high school, i have since learned that “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity; that’s why wise souls from every tradition have spoken of it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). by bringing more of my attention to the present, i have been able to be much more introspective and really discern what i want my life to look like. even my family members have noticed this change in my focus to things that i am truly curious about. when i talked to my father about this process, he said, “i have seen your passion for sustainability grow a lot recently and i am proud of how you have implemented it into your life and career goals” (interview with patrick wolf by moreau fye week 5). this time of discernment has allowed me to understand that the “commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” is simply not true (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). i am grateful for the opportunity that notre dame has given me to explore possible career paths that remain true to my passions, skills, and values. i want to continue to adapt my future plans to fit any new developments in my interests as i progress in my studies. being at notre dame certainly has not been a completely easy experience, and i have found that “when hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). however, i believe that i have taken any failures or downfalls that i have faced and truly learned from them. i have made it a priority to appreciate the gift of education and understand that what is required of me is not perfection but genuine effort. the wide range of life experiences that is present in the student body of notre dame has also introduced me to new ways of dealing with hardships. my roommate’s experiences and beliefs, for example, align greatly with the idea that “‘remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). she has helped me understand how to endure difficult processes as well as help others do the same. i want to continue to grow in this skill in order to create more meaningful connections with those around me. the people that i interact with on a daily basis at notre dame have been truly welcoming and caring, and i am grateful for the community i have found here. i have learned that being vulnerable is important and that “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j moreau fye week 7). while it is often difficult to be open with new people, the rewards are tremendous, and this practice is something that i hope to become better at throughout college and beyond. another way to become closer with others that i have been working on is accompaniment, which is “about sticking with a task until it's deemed completed, not by the accompagnateur but by the person being accompanied” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i have experienced accompaniment from many of my close friends at notre dame, and i plan to prioritize doing so for others in the future. ultimately, i want to continue to work on making strong connections with those around me in order to establish strong community ties as well as expand my view of the world. on a broad level, i have learned through my time in moreau as well as other courses during my first year of studies that my experiences constitute a very limited understanding of the world. one of my goals for the next three years i will spend on campus is to extract myself from any echo chambers or filter bubbles that i am currently in. this “obviously [isn’t] easy to do but [is] well worth the effort for both [myself] and [my] potential connection to the truth” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd moreau fye week 11). i have pushed myself to challenge my own thinking throughout my courses and other experiences in college so far, and i will continue to do so in the future. true change cannot be made unless people from all backgrounds “...talk across differences and create a trust, create a mutual understanding” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). this is something that is extremely important to me in my current studies and beyond. while i currently believe that my future career will be centered around making change for our natural environment, i want to dedicate as much time outside of that work to fight against “ networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week 12). i learned about the social, economic, and political inequalities that plague our society in a gender studies course this year, and it taught me that change in these issues will not come unless people work together to combat them. my experiences at notre dame have led me to discover that it is important to attempt to “understand the racial realities of people of color through authentic interaction rather than through the media or unequal relationships” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). i hope to be able to aid in the work being done to dismantle oppressions and inequalities in our society throughout my time at notre dame and in the future. i have set standards for myself to continue to grow and challenge myself both academically and in my personal life. while these goals may change or take time to achieve, i am ultimately focused on becoming the best version of myself through my learning at notre dame. the changes i have already seen in myself during my first year of studies are tremendous, but i want to continue this trend of introspection and adaptation. it is my mission to take advantage of the many opportunities that i have been given in order to continue to grow as a person and take action for the betterment of others. integration three to you, 40 years lived, a legacy immortalized we will always disappoint people. we will even disappoint ourselves. but the world doesn’t have to end when that happens. the world does not end whenever we are not totally successful in whatever measures we set for ourselves; things may get tough, but ultimately, there is always an opportunity to bounce back from disappointment and it is important to realize that expectations aren’t concrete and that sometimes, you can truly never disappoint other people if the relationship you share is genuine. this is the kind of life my brother, jose luis radilla jr, sought after and preached to all those closest to him. though he was someone who was extremely motivated in both his professional and academic career and spent a lot of his life making sure he was both successful and financially stable, at the end of the day, none of those things are what made my brother truly happy, and he was very honest about it with me and our whole family. one of the most important things he always recalled to me, is that while it is always important to aim high and set yourself to a strict standard, it is not healthy to believe that you can always meet that standard because sometimes, there will be things in the way. for him, there were always many things ‘in the way’. one of those was family, but he let that be a healthy obstacle to him because the things he most valued in this world were the strength of the family and community he built for himself. jose had a fiercely strong sense of loyalty and respect to this community as well. all you gathered here today, i’m sure, felt in one way or another, the all-encompassing love and friendship he so genuinely tried to share with those close to him. you know that regardless of blood's bonds, he treated anyone he even had an ounce of care for as if they were of his own creed, his own family. he was totally unselfish in that he desired to exceed expectations and break barriers that haven’t been done before in our family by simply embracing his unique identity while also continually seeking to better himself as a man, a brother, a son, a husband, a father; both for himself, but primarily for those around him. (“week five discernment conversation activity” by week five). in this way, this was the only manner in which he ever disappointed anyone; i think we can all say that my brother was not selfish enough at times, that he did not take his own advice and live more for himself than he should have, because he truly deserved it. i know that jose really valued independence, thus why even though he allowed so many others to rely on him, he rarely, if at all, would let others carry the burden of his own struggles. he set himself to a high standard, always seeking to do the best he could do, and sometimes aspiring to that high mark tends to put you in positions of isolation and suffering. he did not want this for any of his family and endlessly fought to make sure they wouldn’t have to by taking that burden on himself and only presenting himself in ways that showed the caring, loving, and passionate side of his persona. to my little brother, i wish he would have known that everyone he gave his all to wishes that he would’ve just taken back a little bit of that effort and care, and treated himself with the same kindness and passion he did others. this was truly the mark of a man who focused on what we could do for others instead of what he could not do and what he did not have yet. (“why does god allow suffering?” by tania brown, moreau week six). despite his suffering and the mental anguish caused by it, he still came out of it wanting to serve others. everyone can relate to the fact that they have gone through or will go through the suffering that can cause them to develop a negative outlook on life. however, it is only further perpetuated by things like pessimism, self-pity, or negativity; jose knew that these were very human reactions to suffering and that one must go through the wringer to learn, but whether it be with god, with loved ones, or through some other source, one has to eventually learn to look past the suffering and not let it define their lives. even though he is not with us today, his life is not defined by the fact that he took it from himself, and by no means does this suggest that the suffering it caused for all of us here today is meaningless. we can still find comfort and ultimate meaning in learning to look outwards, learning to seek ways that we can still make ourselves feel useful to others so that they make a positive impact on themselves and the world around them. and that he did. i cannot echo enough how much every action he undertook was in service to others. but it is also why i urge all of you to take my brother’s life as an example and a reminder that doing nothing for a while, that living for yourself for a while, is one of the hardest things in life, but one of the most necessary. (“why we need to slow our lives down” by pico iyer, moreau week one). i share with you all a quote pope francis that embodies what my brother’s life truly stood for and will continue to stand for well beyond his days on this earth; “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis, moreau week 7). my brother held out this hope for much of his life and though the embers of that flame monetarily ran out, do not allow them to die within yourselves. live in memory of him and pursue the life he would’ve you all wanted to live, pursue the happiness that you most hope for, the life that you most envision. he is no longer with us in flesh, but in heart and in mind, he will live forever. the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. to grow as a person, we must face adversity and situations that force us into changing our habits, our beliefs, our fundamental core identities, and though something that is quite obvious, this aspect can go overlooked in today’s society due to the prevalence of routine and comfort in life derived from the hierarchy of systems that fuel our society today. jumping headfirst into this gray unknown capstone labrador 1 professor harrington moreau first-year experience 4/29/2022 sophia’s guide to a life well lived part 1 mission statement (moreau fye week thirteen): my mission is to be an anchor to others in my life, both in times of need and in times of joy. my strengths lie in forming close and meaningful relationships with the ones i love, and i seek to foster those relationships so that i may serve my loved ones to my best ability. i seek to bring happiness in little ways rather than through grand gestures. i hope to be there for my friends and family in celebrations and in mourning. i want to be an anchor so that they always feel grounded in me and know that they can rely on me. i work to balance my independence with my service to others so that i remain faithful to my own passions without becoming lost in the missions of those around me. beyond my close relationships, i seek to be an anchor to those in my community and around the world through my work endeavors and personal projects. i act with integrity and ambition, with clarity and determination, and with grit and enthusiasm. while i continue to move forward, i acknowledge that i was formed from my experiences, and i embrace all of them, both good and bad. i am a daughter. i am a learner. i am loyal to my friends and loyal to myself. i am an anchor. part 2 one important lesson i’ve learned in freshman year is that rest is required to optimize efficiency in a busy life. this year has pushed me to my limits and i’ve been more burnt out than i ever have before. in an article about technology sabbath, pico iyer noted that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). if i want to help others as i stated in my mission statement, i need to first take care of myself and listen to my needs, and one important way to do so is through rest and distance from technology. thus, a life well lived is one lived with “pause” and reflection. one example of an anchor at notre dame was fr. hesburgh––a man who was grounded in his faith and mission to bring all kinds of people together. in the hesburgh film, president barack obama wrote that “father hesburgh has long spoken of his institution as both a lighthouse and a crossroads. a lighthouse that stands apart, shining with the wisdom of the catholic tradition, while the crossroads is where 'differences of culture and religion and conviction can co-exist with friendship, civility, hospitality, and especially love'” (hesburgh film moreau fye week two). fr. hesburgh’s work (especially the admission of women to nd!) to transform notre dame into a place that would promote good for all inspires me to follow his example and use my career to serve others. he taught me that a life well lived is one in which you work to spread love and compassion to your community through values of inclusion and understanding. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 labrador 2 i’ve also learned that a life well lived does not ignore death. the second semester was the fastest four months of my life and while i am reminded that my time at the university is fleeting, i recall sister aletheia. in her work with memento mori, sister aletheia noticed that “‘remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau wye week three). as i move further in life, i need to embrace the bad and the good without fear, especially when my goals do not go according to plan. thus, a life well lived pushes through the highs and lows, accepting that each moment is sacred. my career is one of the ways i can primarily be an anchor to others outside of the close circle of my family and friends. through my freshman courses, i’ve been exposed to the career center, which has helped me begin to discern how i can combine my skills and want to serve others. an article on discernment from the ccd references dr. donald super: “he contended that…the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). because one’s career takes up an immense amount of one’s time and therefore plays a large role in defining one’s life, i want to find a job that serves as a source of fulfillment while allowing me to obtain financial independence. thus, a life well lived includes work that aligns with one’s purpose and therefore promotes happiness and the ability to participate in their community. this semester was the longest i’ve ever been away from home. i last saw my parents and sister in january. thus, it was very nice to have a conversation with my mother for moreau in week five of the semester. i’ve found that she always knows how to give the best advice, especially when i am struggling. during the time that i talked to her, i had a lot of schoolwork and was slightly homesick because of the rough weather. one of her pieces of advice to be was to remember my goals and focus on the larger picture. at that moment, i was living with tunnel vision, focusing on the problems right in front of me and losing sight of the purpose behind my work. thus, my mom helped me realize that a life well lived is one in which we can step back and realize that our goals are threaded through each experience, both good and bad. that is the larger picture. leaving home and coming to notre dame has made me so much more grateful for my education and family. when work piles up (or finals roll around) and i am tired and busy, i often lose sight of how fortunate i am. dr. jihoon kim’s recovery taught him how to appreciate his body and ability despite his injury. he says, “i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet.” (“5 minutes” moreau fye week six). being thankful encourages mindfulness and makes life so much sweeter. thus, a life well lived is one lived with appreciation, gratitude, and love for every single day. being an anchor requires me to know and understand the relationships around me with empathy and an open heart. fr. greg boyle wrote that a crucial part of humanity is to “seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 labrador 3 the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). he claims that at the heart of all fractures in our society lies “lovelessness.” i find this description interesting because he implies that we cannot erase our wounds but rather patch them together with love without forgetting the mistakes of our past. thus, a life well lived spreads love, especially in the brokenness that persists in our society. additionally, being an anchor requires active, attentive, and intentional listening. at notre dame, i’ve been lucky enough to listen to a multitude of various stories by meeting new people in classes and clubs. i’ve learned that part of being a listener is accompaniment and companionship. professor steve reifenberg notes, “in teaching about and sharing experiences of accompaniment, we can chart a path that, walking together, we can make real those great and amazing dreams” (“teaching accompaniment” by professor steve reifenberg). i believe that we were created to live in community to enrich and better each other’s lives. thus, according to professor reifenberg, a life well lived is one lived together, with others, through accompaniment. during the admission process, i wanted to attend a college that would promote diversity because i wanted to learn from all types of people, especially those different from the people in my hometown. because of notre dame’s status as a very well-known university, i knew that the school attracted people from everywhere around the world. the notre dame statement on inclusion describes “the law of love of god and..the holy spirit that we might live lives of love and receive the gift of eternal life” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). i admire the fact that nd’s philosophy on inclusion is guided by love, which in turn, helps us learn about others different from ourselves. being here, surrounded by people with many different backgrounds, has shown me that a life well lived is one in which i am constantly learning and growing in my beliefs and outlook on life while i am informed by the diverse voices around me. the course registration process in college was something completely new to me. i’ve learned that every class counts as every class is an investment of time, energy, and money. thus, even if i am not fully enjoying a class, i should nevertheless try my best to soak up all the information presented to me. similarly, the hidden brain podcast we listened to in week eleven discusses the importance of intention in politics: “so in short-cut politics, in hobbyism, emotion is the goal. it makes you feel connected to something without doing anything yourself” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain moreau fye week eleven). here, the podcast asserts that many people interested in politics treat it as entertainment rather than a means to better the world; intentions are skewed. carrying this observation into college, i want to treat each course as an opportunity to learn as much as i can rather than a credit i must complete. thus, a life well lived is one lived with the perspective that challenges, and every other experience, are chances to grow and not just tasks to complete. finally, being an anchor means living with love for the people around me. nd law dean g. marcus cole said that “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it…we must all make a conscious decision and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ labrador 4 effort to expand our circles” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i hope to use my time at nd as a stepping stone to meet all sorts of people, everywhere. by doing so, i think that i can learn more about how love takes shape in all forms, in all sorts of relationships. a life well lived means a life shared with all sorts of people in a circle that keeps expanding. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ sem 2 integration 1 the importance of a life well-lived dear younger me, i’m writing this to you as a college freshman that is done with three-quarters of his first year. i wanted to tell you the importance of living a life well-lived and what that means for someone in elementary school. mom and dad will tell you that you need to get good grades and nothing else matters. grades do matter. don’t get d’s or f’s but focus on doing the things that you really care about. as you continue throughout your school years, remember that ““stepping farther back and standing still” allows you to “see what that canvas…really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, fye week 1). it will be easy to get caught up in the random daily occurrences of elementary school and to imagine that nothing matters. that is true and elementary school is a time to explore and do the things that you love. i want you to always carry with you the importance of not sacrificing who you are for the happiness of others. your values and what you believe in is the most important of who you are and you should never sacrifice those. father hesburgh is another example of this as “he could talk with russian scientists and american scientists” and “they were pleased to have a mediator even if they didn’t believe in the catholic church but they respected him as a man of religion” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley, fye week 2). regardless of whatever you end up finding passionate or doing with your life, you will never have to sacrifice who you are or what you believe in just to have a job or to make money. you can live a life where you can combine both of those into something where you feel like you are making a real difference in the world. it is also important to remember that life will not always be smooth. obstacles will constantly stand in our way. however, the things that define us are not the obstacles that stop us but how we respond to the setbacks. it’s the importance of defining ourselves and how we interact with each other that allows us to move forward. the “central issue in being a human being…is…agape a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other’” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes, fye week 3). we need to love both ourselves and those around us to move past the setbacks that will inevitably reach us in life. finding the ways in which you love yourself is going to be so important because in this life, family and friends can only do so much for you and there are times where you can only rely on yourself. it is in those moments that you make sure that you are able to love yourself and find those things in life that make you feel fulfilled so that you can love yourself and your peers. in those moments of pain and desperation, find the things that you enjoy doing. know that “there’s no relationship between introspection and insight” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich, fye week 6). know yourself and how you respond to those tough moments so that you can overcome them and come out a stronger person. the things that will give you a fulfilling life are not the things that will make you the most money or make the most friends. it is the thing that makes you feel the happiest and you lose track of time. when you get to college, this is going to be so important because “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major’ for you” (navigating your career journey, meruelo family center for career development, fye week 4). no one can find the best major for you because it all comes down to exactly what you find most fulfilling in your life. this is why in your life, you should take advantage of those moments where you are stress-free and you feel as if you have all the time and ability in the world to explore your passions and who you want to be. you’ll learn this later in life but always remember to not “seek or rely on validation or recognition from others as my main source of happiness” (friend conversation, fye week 5). using others as a crutch for your own happiness or your purpose does not give you the fulfilling moments where you can feel completely happy with yourself. you will always feel as if you are acting just to get people to like you. however, there is a difference between relying on others and utilizing the friendships you have and the moments where you need your friends to support you. “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, fye week 7). there are always moments where you have to turn to your friends and find support in those who care most about you. taking care of and loving yourself doesn’t always come naturally or doesn’t always happen and in those moments, it is completely fine to turn to your support system and find the things that you love. finding those small moments where everyone loves each other and is happy with the way things are will give you the most gratitude and happiness. at the end of the day, living a life well-lived constitutes a lot of things. you have to balance your interpersonal relationships to stay mutually beneficial and not toxic for either side. find the passions and the things you love to do that makes work feel like a hobby. all in all, i know that you’ll be able to do it and take the lessons i’ve told you and make them part of your own life so you can be better than i ever was. capstone integration moreau capstone integration “it’s not about the money, it’s about (living a life well-lived)” i am a 19-year-old student at the university of notre dame dedicated to making the world a better place through my actions. to support this goal, i have engaged in many service activities throughout my life and joined the notre dame naval reserve officer training corps. as a catholic, i believe in one god and am committed to bringing the kingdom of god to this world through acts of charity, service, and allyship. as a student, i am committed to the collection of knowledge and understanding, especially in the field of engineering. the university of notre dame has provided me with the means to pursue this goal. as a member of the united states navy, i am committed to supporting freedom of the seas around the world and defending the blue and littoral waters of the united states and its allies. i am dedicated to maximizing my growth as a man through physical, emotional, and intellectual means. despite my goal for growth, i am always aware of the possibility of temporary failure and try with utmost concentration and effort to use my failures as motivation and not depression. the state of my mental and physical health is also of great importance to me. through the grace of god, i am in belief that i can accomplish anything. i plan to live out my mission statement by bringing the kingdom of god through creating environments that foster love, care, and respect. i will work to create these environments because everyone has the power to make a difference in the world. as pope francis said, “the future of humankind isn’t exclusively in the hands of politicians, of great leaders, of big companies” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i will live out my mission statement to make the world a better place by working to find hope and bright spots in life. “when the hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week six), so in reaction to this, i will try to focus on what i do have when it is easy to sulk and focus on what i do not. i will live out my mission statement with determination to improve the lives of as many people as possible. in my discernment conversation with my mother in one of my moreau assignments, she said i loved two things, “people and purpose” (discernment conversation moreau fye week five). these two things will have a large role in my life and my goal to live out my mission statement. i will live out my mission statement by having the confidence to take risks. often it is easy for me to simply hide with everyone else and blend in. this action has no risk and requires no confidence in myself. however, the more risks i take, the more confident i become and the more i will get to know myself. the more i know myself, the more i know what will truly make me happy and what i am good at, and the more i can use that to help others and the world, completing my mission statement (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this journey of self-discovery should extend past me, to try to help others to find themselves. i will live out my mission statement by bringing joy everywhere i go and doing what will bring joy to myself. i like to think about the questions, “i ask myself two things about every choice i make ‘will this bring me true joy now?’ and ‘will this bring me true joy in 30 years?’ if it could do neither, then god was not calling me to it”. (“three key questions by michael himes” moreau fye week three). i will live out my mission statement by living like father theodore hesburgh (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). fr. hesburgh is an inspiration to me and i will work to live a life continuing his mission. i will work to foster a community of love and cooperation with little of the division that so often characterizes our world, just as fr. hesburgh did. as i work tirelessly to fulfill my mission statement, i shall not forget to slow down and reflect. too often, we feel like “we’re never caught up with our lives” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i will not be able to fully live out my mission statement if i am constantly behind on my own life. by slowing down and reflecting each day, i will grow to become the best version of myself who will live my mission statement. i will live out my mission statement by living in solidarity with the poor and marginalized of society as jesus did. fighting for solidarity among all people is not a new thing or unique to catholicism, steve reifenberg says, “on the theological side, i was struck how every major religious tradition – including islam, hinduism, judaism, buddhism, and christianity –has as a central concern of connecting our lives with those who are downtrodden, the victim, the widow, the orphan, the poor. the admonition is consistent across all traditions: look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another”(teaching accompanimenta learning journey together” by steve reifenberg, moreau week nine). i will live out my mission statement by being an ally to those excluded from society and discriminated against. this “spirit of inclusion” is key to properly follow my mission statement goal of bringing the kingdom of god through allyship. the statement, “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion” (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame moreau week ten) from the spirit of inclusion at notre dame highlights how integral inclusion is to my catholic faith and identity. the rejection of anyone based on race, gender, sexual orientation, religion, etc. is a rejection of jesus christ, and this would be an ultimate failure on my part to live out my mission statement. i will live out my mission statement through constructive intellectual discussion. intellectual thought and discussion will be very important in these next few years as i am in college trying to receive a degree. as i participate in these discussions, it is important i do not begin rejecting ideas i disagree with and create bubbles because “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion.” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd moreau week eleven). it will not be easy to continuously follow my mission statement. there will be days that i fail to live in the kingdom of god and days that i do not want to care about my studies. through all this, i must be resilient. after all, it is a general mission statement, not a day-by-day checklist. thank you theo for an amazing semester in moreau! moreau integration three 3/4/21 eulogy: william patrick linnen, known as liam by friends and family, was a son, husband, brother, great father, grandfather, great-grandfather, dog owner, and benefactor. he is survived by his brother, three sons and two daughters, eight grandsons and nine granddaughters, two great-grandsons, two great granddaughters, his golden retriever, and countless dear friends. he was a lifetime resident of the city of chicago born to anne and joe linnen in 2002. his loved ones would tell you he is most known for his smile and sense of humor. linnen was educated at saint ignatius college prep ‘21 and the university of notre dame ‘25. at ignatius, he developed a love for running. he continued this love by competing in marathons until his mid-70s. at notre dame, he developed a great love for helping others and the common good. a great graduate of the university. up until his early eighties, he would never miss a home game tailgater (unless there was a home white sox baseball game)! his three grandchildren at the university at the time would tell you: he was a master on the grill! with his notre dame education, linnen had success in the business world. he was successful at a young age, so he got the courage to go out on his own. in 2029, he married the love of his life. he eventually opened his own start-up firm in 2037. by 2042, linnen’s company was one of the top earning firms in the country he was featured in business magazines across the globe. employees that worked for linnen concur: “everyday one of us saw him in the office our day was made, his smile was contagious.” however, linnen was always around to coach one of his kids’ little league games or help with homework he was a family man in every sense of the word. linnen was a great disciple of the lord. he was very involved at his chicago parish. he was monumental in starting and even ran his parish’s soup kitchen for some time. he created a foundation that enabled unprivileged refugee children to receive otherwise unattainable educational opportunities. he was on the board of chicago catholic charities. he was involved with “healthy chicago”, which helps low-income household families receive healthy and nutritious food. linnen enjoyed his well-deserved retirement while remaining active in his chicago charities. avid skiers and hikers, he and his wife retired in deer valley. when they got sick of the cold ski weather (linnen would blame that on the wife), he retired to his beach house in anguilla. however, the city of chicago was his true love. a life-long white sox fan, linnen bought the team in 2058. as an owner, he rarely missed a game (sometimes to his wife’s dismay). linnen was known for his impromptu stand up sessions at family parties. in his words (not mine): “i am the king of comedy; i would make snl or whatever comedy show you young ins like nowadays go out of business. i would have made it big time if i did not fall for your mother/grandmother/great-grandmother. whatever (big hand wave), that’s for another life, hopefully i am not slowed down by the wife in that one.” his wife would just shake her head knowing it was just another joke. linnen loved her more than anything in the world. linnen will be missed by all who know him. his smile and laugh will never be forgotten. he has impacted countless lives for the better. this earth was made better with him in it. whenever a young one in the family was crying, a true sweet tooth, linnen was the man to cheer them up: “stop crying, for pete’s sake. just rub it on a brick and enjoy some candy (hands child candy). by the way, do not tell your mother about the candy.” reflection: i want to be remembered as a charitable person and family man. i want the relationships in my life to be strong and life-giving. i believe i have a heart that responds and wants to be with others: “solidarity, however, is not an automatic mechanism. it cannot be programmed or controlled. it is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone. yes, a free response!” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). i believe i possess this free response. this free response implies i talked about myself as a family man, well-liked boss, and good friend in my eulogy. solidarity must be developed in a person. fr. hesburgh continues to inspire me to develop skills in solidarity. fr. hesburgh taught me that in a world that can be divided at times we must bring people together. hesburgh was that example of solidarity: “he could bring people together…that’s the kind of leader we need today” ("hesburgh", by patrick creadon moreau fye week two) i talked about myself as a charitable person. this giving back implies barriers being broken between communities true solidarity. in my perspective, bridging gaps between people inspires me to live a life well-lived. in order to find inspiration to make the world a better place, we must explore life. to explore life, we should discern our path: "what are possible ways of living a life well-lived?" ("navigating your career journey", by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i mentioned my education led me to success in the business world. this is because education will help me explore what interests me. in turn, this will lead to the real me. if i find a career that intrigues me, i am bound to be successful because i will be more passionate about my job. my passion lies in being in solidarity by helping and inspiring others. therefore, i wrote about helping others. while navigating my career journey, i should continue to ask myself questions in order to gauge my interests. i did not name a specific company or career choice in my writing because i have no idea what i want to do after school. my classes at notre dame will help me formulate these opinions. i should make the realization that our strengths and weaknesses both teach us something about ourselves: “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die", by ruth graham moreau fye week three). in my career search, stepping out of my comfort zone will enable me to find what truly fascinates me. by always standing for what he believes is morally right, fr. hesburgh inspires me to reach out of my comfort zone to find this light. these questions about a life-well lived will lead to further career and life discernment in general. conservations with those who love and care for us the most can guide us on the right path. sometimes others see aspects of our personalities that we overlook. learning about these traits is inspiring. it enables one to look at their life from a whole new perspective. upon learning about these new perspectives, i can explore career options on irish compass ("discerning a life well-lived irish compass activity", by moreau fye instructors moreau week five). irish compass will hopefully lead me to enjoy my work. as i talked about it, my coworkers constantly saw me smiling. finding work that leads me to happiness is important to me. practicing self-reflection will help me find happiness in my career choice. slowing down and truly getting to know yourself is important in this process: “but as fast as geography is coming under our control, the clock is exerting more and more tyranny over us. and the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” ("why we need to slow down our lives", by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in writing this piece, i realized that life is short. hence, we must make the most of every day. reflecting on everyday makes me more appreciative and grateful like sister theresa aletheia. obstacles can get in the way of practicing self-reflection. therefore, asking yourself the right questions internally and externally are vital to a life well lived. asking questions that trap us in the past is not helpful: “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” ("five minutes", by the grotto network moreau fye week six). asking why there is evil in the world has no purpose. but, asking what you can do to fix these negative aspects of the world has a purpose. various times in my writing, it is implied that i asked myself: how can i make a difference in a person’s life? what can i do to be a force of good? focusing on others will enable me to get out of my own obstacles. serving others enables me to help myself. the life-giving force of gratitude mission statement: i want to be remembered by my family, friends, wife, children, and those with who i had the pleasure to work during my career, as a man who was grounded in humility, a leader with infectious enthusiasm and simple goodness, and endless love. i believe the highest good in life is to walk with others, serve others, learn from them, grow from them, and ensure that everything you learn in service is passed down to the next generation. in doing so i will prepare my children for a life of happiness yet challenge grounded by wisdom i have acquired in the service of others. my desire to walk with and serve others stems from my immense gratitude for everything my parents have done and still do for me. i grew up and continue to grow in a position of privilege. i come from a well-off white catholic family in a suburb of pennsylvania and never faced true adversity. i believe that i owe it to those who were not as privileged as me to serve others, both in and out of uniform. serving my country is my main priority, but also serving my community. i envision my service to my community in the form of a mentorship role for underprivileged children, encouraging them to walk the path of love in pursuit of a higher purpose. i want my children to know that they are loved unconditionally, but i will always hold them accountable for their actions. i believe that the most important thing anyone can do in their life is to instill good morals and love in their children in order to create a better future for everyone. growing up, my parents were always hard on me. my father comes from a large family from a very poor part of philadelphia who did not attend college and entered right into the workforce. he never wanted me to grow up as that private school kid who knows nothing about hard work and adversity. i am grateful that he always was hard on me, but showed me, unconditional love. he let me know when i was not working hard enough or being an undisciplined child. i believe that has prepared me for a life in the military where tough love is the only kind of love. i want to imbue my children with that same unconditional yet tough love because that is the legacy i want to leave behind. in my future career as a marine corps officer, if one of my junior marines is failing fitness tests, i will sit them down, and take whatever steps i need to according to the marine corps standards, but when i'm done truly ask them why. i want to understand why they are being lazy with fitness. maybe their situation at home is not healthy or they are suffering from mental illness. i want to hold them accountable, but show them love and walk with them if they are suffering, and actively participate in their recovery. to prepare myself for the inevitable suffering it is important to remind myself that there will be a lot of challenges and suffering in my future. i believe the best way to respond to suffering is to rely on your friends, families, and loved ones that walk with me. by focusing on creating strong relationships now, i am preparing my circle to help me get through difficult times. just as i would help someone else who is suffering. anyone who believes they can suffer alone and overcome that suffering often figures out that it just turns out worse. i want to ensure that i return to the things that i do when i am at my best, am happiest, and most content with the person i am. that is when i am training hard with my friends, whether that be in martial arts, physical fitness, or military training. training hard, challenging ourselves, and overcoming adversity together brings us all together and morale is at its peak when we all sit down for a 7 am breakfast after a hard workout. starting my day off with a challenging workout alongside my closest friends helps me stay centered and focused through the rest of the day, ensuring that i can be my best self in all my interactions. i am also at my best when i am walking with other people who are suffering. i believe i have gotten very good at just listening to people and letting them know that i am there for them and feel the burden they also feel. sometimes that is impossible for me to feel, such as when i talk to one of my best friends aiden. aiden was one of the few black students in my high school. we got very close because we started training brazilian jiu-jitsu together. something about that training environment always led us to have great conversations such as race in our high school. i never noticed the things he noticed, such as when doing a group read and the book had the n-word in it, everyone in the class would glance at aiden. it was subtle things like that that aiden pointed out to me that helped me avoid some of the little prejudice tendencies that made him feel uncomfortable. having those uncomfortable conversations with someone that i trust and care about is how i intend to continue to break down biases and grow to be a more inclusive and understanding man. in order for my mission to be successful, i need to always be finding new ways to challenge myself and grow, i need to continue investing in life-giving relationships and eventually turn all my focus to ensuring my children are in the best possible situation to learn and grow into people of great character. reflection: need to tie everything to gratitude. reflecting on the past 14 weeks in moreau, i want to explore the potential ways in which i can apply the lessons i've learned to the next three years of my life and beyond. the most important lesson i have learned this past year is the importance of gratitude. i am extremely grateful for the opportunities i have been given in my life. yes, i have earned many of them, but i am grateful for the positions i have been put in to accomplish my goals. from a young age, i always had opportunities thrown at me. i was and still am very privileged in that regard. i never needed to work outside of school like some of my friends. i was able to focus on school and sports. i grew up in a safe neighborhood and had a stable home situation. today, i am on full scholarship at the university of notre dame, so many people’s dream school. i am surrounded by some of the best mentors and people i have ever met in my life. i can name at least 10 people that would drop whatever they are doing and come help me with whatever i need. most people can only name 1 or 2. i am very grateful for the relationships i have formed here at notre dame. i've learned that in order for real change to happen everyone needs to take an active role in it. for example, if we want to make non-catholics feel more included on campus, we all need to take a part in that, not just the administration. it takes a little bit of effort from everyone to make real change. “all of us are involved in the mission: those who go out to work and those whose labors sustain the community itself, those in the fullness of their strength and those held back by sickness or by age, those who abide in the companionship of a local house and those sent to live and work by themselves, those in their active assignments and those who are still in training. all of us as a single brotherhood are joined in one communal response to the lord’s mission”(“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week 12). this quote resonates with me because it speaks to how all the members of a community can participate in change. everyone has a part that is crucial for any unjust system to change. father hesburgh comments: “we do not know where to go from here. and we do not know what we're going to do. but i can guarantee you that there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice, and at times human stupidity. there are many songs yet to be sung in the name of joy and happy marriages, and good families, and dedication to all that is good and true and beautiful”(“notre dame commencement 1987” by father hesburgh week 2 moreau). i felt such a strong feeling of appreciation and gratitude for the opportunity i have in attending such an incredible university. fr. hesburgh was so much more than the president of this university. he was a role model for every student. he was a trusted voice for change in america. after having watched this movie, i will feel so much appreciation walking past hesburgh library every day. everyone at notre dame must commit to carrying out father hesburgh's vision of equality and contribute to his legacy. one way we can all work towards eliminating bias and encouraging open conversation is by exposing ourselves to different perspectives. in week 11 of moreau, we learned about how biases grow when we filter out all opposition. “his social network naturally filters friends. so he ends up hearing from a very narrow segment of the population. paul joins a group on his online social network, devoted to championing the benefits of extreme exercise. when some members express concerns about developing unhealthy norms, they are immediately shut down”(“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). by avoiding differing opinions, we only reinforce our biases. in order to move forward as a society, we must all commit to being open to having our opinions changed. i am grateful for the friends that i have me at notre dame. i am beginning my journey to being more comfortable with personal things and being vulnerable with at least 3 close friends. from week 10 of moreau, we read an anecdote about a guy growing up gay and catholic: “wow, thanks for telling me,” he said after a minute. “do you want to talk about it?” the knot in my stomach untied, and i let go of the steering wheel. when we got out of the car more than an hour later, we were both laughing and wiping tears from our eyes” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). this reminded me of my friend owen who came out as gay in high school. he was very brave and told our 6 guy friends at the same time. we were all super close friends and none of us saw him any differently. i admired the fact that he sat 6 of his closest guy friends down at the same time and came out to them. that is the epitome of being vulnerable. i wish i had his courage. i learned from that experience that being vulnerable to those who you trust is very important. not only does it make you feel better, it makes the whole group come together. recently, i asked him how he mustered the courage to tell us, and he said he was very afraid but he trusted us and knew we wouldn’t change the way we felt about him. what i took from that conversation was the importance of a few very close friends that you can share anything with. life is difficult, curveballs hit all the time. in fact, i am dealing with one right now and it is shaking my world up pretty good. even if it changes my career path a lot, i know that the friends and family i have met will be with me every step of the way. for that, i am very grateful. a quote from week 9 also resonates with the idea of being vulnerable. “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way, someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment.”(“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i am much more comfortable when i am the one listening to someone be vulnerable, but i realized the best way to help someone be vulnerable is to open myself up and be vulnerable. i started sharing what is going on in my life more with my best friend robert. we have been making weekly trips to the grotto at night and sharing what we have been struggling with and what has been going well. i cherish these times with robert and i am grateful that i get to spend the next four years with him. i believe that self-reflection is very important for productivity and overall mental health. i do a bad job at self-reflection. i find myself only reflecting when times get tough, not when times are good. i believe that i would benefit from taking a quiet period once a week at the grotto. even if nothing is wrong, forcing myself to debrief at the grotto would be good. i got this idea from week 1 of moreau. “the computer chip maker intel experimented with a “quiet period” of four hours every tuesday, during which three hundred engineers and managers were asked to turn off their email and phones and put up “do not disturb” signs on their office doors in order to make space for ‘thinking time’”(“why dont we slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week 1). i believe i would be more centered and happy if i took a quiet period at the grotto every week. another way i make myself happy is by doing computer science work. i learned in high school that when i am doing homework that i enjoy, it does not feel like homework. in week four of moreau, i read that “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.”(“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course“ moreau fye week 4). i found this to be very true and it makes me excited to be continuing with computer science at notre dame. moreau integration three a life of service, innovation, and love: was a vibrant soul who could bring laughter to nearly any room. she had grown up during the rise of social media and technology that seemingly morphed to our brains. yet, she acknowledged that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer– moreau fye week one). this quote reflects the way that katie lived her life, because she would put her phone down and connect with family and friends. taking a break from technology was often needed as a student at notre dame, since many assignments revolved around technology. as a first year student in college, katie made the goal to focus on being fully present and off her phone wherever she happened to be with others, and she has lived up to this goal. she was also a loving person who looked past the perceived differences between us. katie had encountered people of many different ethnicities, religions, personalities, and backgrounds at notre dame, and this is how she showed her catholic faith–through agape towards others. father hesburg described notre dame as both a lighthouse and a crossroads, ”a lighthouse that stands apart shining with the wisdom of catholic tradition. while the crossroads is where differences of culture, religion, and conviction can coexist…” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley–moreau fye week two). katie took this aspect of notre dame and applied it to her life, where she could love others from different backgrounds, yet express her own ideas about the catholic faith. she made the goal of living out a catholic faith, which included loving others and sharing what she believes. the passing of katie reminds us of our limited time in this world. we often like to push the idea of death and growing old out of our minds–thinking it is so far away. yet, katie did her https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 best to embrace this fact–through action in the present moment. katie struggled with procrastination, saying that there would always be more time later, always less busy later. but she learned that the time to act would be the present–or at least at a set time in the future. “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing,” but katie was mindful that this was not the case in this world (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by new york times–moreau week three). this end of life is why katie chose to go to notre dame, she knew her life would end, and she did not want to die without having at least given it her best effort to learn about god and how to live a good life. katie has schoolmates lose their lives at a young age, and this reminded her of how we cannot know when we or others will leave this world, so we should be as spiritually prepared as we can be while showing kindness to all others. at a young age, katie made the goal of prioritizing relationships with others and god, since she knew that is what she valued most and got the most fulfillment from. katie had limited experience when it came to exploration, she had lived in the same city growing up and focused all her energy into school. she came to the decision to pursue some sort of engineering, but she had no engineering knowledge or experience upon entering notre dame. she came to the understanding that, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development –moreau week four). she explored the different clubs at notre dame, and found herself enthralled by the rocketry team, where learned more about aerospace engineering and came to the understanding that she wanted her career to be something related to flight and engineering. this idea of exploring and testing out different options with careers also https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ applies to the way katie decided to choose where to live. just as she explored different engineering disciplines, she also explored living in the midwest, west coast, hawaii, and eventually settled here in oregon. during her first year of college, katie had an insightful conversation, where she asked her mother, “what do you think i want to change in the world” ( “ moreau fye_week five_discernment conversation activity_sp22” by moreau instructors–moreau week five). her mother answered, “i know you want to change the world for the better and help the less fortunate, but it is up to you on how that happens.” this response stuck out to katie, and she tried to live this out through the education outreach on the rocketry team. she spoke with children about rockets and provided fun activities for children–an opportunity katie had not had growing up. later in life, katie used her engineering skills to innovate an efficient jetpack that allows volunteers to reach all corners of the earth with aid. katie made the goal of using her engineering skills for good rather than for war or money, and she has accomplished this through her innovations. katie had been playing sports her entire life before going to college. but when her schedule became busy, she began working out less and less. this made her frustrated how her abilities had disappeared and she could not do everything that she used to be able to do. katie found that by focusing on “what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” allows us to grow into the best version of ourselves (“5 minutes” by aira swarr–moreau week six). she believed that having a negative mindset stunted our growth, so we should be positive about the things we can do and the things we are working towards being able to do. this slow progress encouraged her to get back into shape and do the best she can at https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 whatever stage in her life she happened to be in. katie made the goal of having a positive mindset and focusing on the positive, rather than the negative. katie lived by showing kindness and tenderness to others. this was evident by her efforts to help her classmates, children in the south bend community, and her service through the church. she valued the help she received in her childhood, and spent her adulthood giving back to the community. a core belief of katie’s was that “tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis– moreau week seven). katie experienced how receiving and giving compassion allows for the growth of relationships and a sense of community. she would want us all to show tenderness and compassion, rather than indifference. katie made the goal of rooting out her indifference for the condition of others, and she made the world a better place by doing so. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript week 14capstone integration three helm moreau first year experience april 29, 2022 discerning a life well lived as the academic year comes to a close it is nice to reflect on all that we have learned. in our final qqc, i stated my mission statement and discerned it the following way (moreau fye week thirteen). over the course of this semester, i have realized that my mission aligns with mendoza's school of business’s motto of “growing the good in business.” although this is not my main purpose in life i think that this statement can apply to everything. i want to grow the good in every person i encounter, every place i go, and in everything that i do. i hope that my career will uphold these same values to bring a positive light into the world. as i have discussed in my previous qqc assignments, it has been difficult for me to see what my life will look like and how i can use a thing like business, which typically has a bad reputation, to be successful and help others. i think that over the course of the semester i have realized that this is possible and mendoza and notre dame are working every day with students to help them come to that realization. in order to live a well-lived life, i want to improve the lives of others. this might not be through my career even, but possibly family. i think that i can also achieve this through a religious aspect. by continuing to practice my faith i can become more grounded in order to insure that i am able to pursue my mission. i also think that my belief in god will help me to embrace humanity, take responsibility, and act with courage. the first step to completing this mission is taking time for self-reflection. in pico lyer’s opening statements he exclaims, “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity; that’s why wise souls from every tradition have spoken of it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) i think this is a great analogy because it associates self-discovery with natural and traditional laws and ideas. i think that taking a break or slowing down is crucial in this time because technology is somewhat of disruption to our natural or human state. i previously recounted my outward bound trip freshman year of high school. during this trip, we were split into groups of about a dozen kids and had to navigate the appalachian mountains. we had to hike and navigate, learn survival skills to get through the august storms, work together, purify the water, make meals, and set up camps. we also engaged in a solo part where we were able to reflect and write a letter to ourselves that we would receive a year later. during this solo, i wrote about how thankful i was for all the great things and technology we have today. the trip and reflection time really put things into perspective. everything about it was so memorable and crystal clear in my mind even though i don't have many pictures or videos to remind me of it. i think this proves how slowing down can be extremely helpful. the opportunity i had to share time with a group of kids i may have never known is priceless and the self-discoveries i made about myself and the privileges i have on a daily basis was something i could never get by reading it on the internet or watching a video of someone else doing these things. from that trip on i was able to put my life into perspective and https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ learn to live my life in a meaningful way. in order to live out my mission statement, i will need to take time to reflect and step back from the rush in life. living out a life well lived might also require you to identify people or actions that you admire. in week 2 we watched a documentary about hesburgh and all the inspiring things he did(moreau fye week two). i think that you have to identify some inspirational people, question how they did what they did, explore how that can apply to your life, and discern your own life by putting your thoughts into action. father himes is questioned about “what others need from you?” i think this is another really good question(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). how do we know if we are helping or hurting others? all of these things are very philosophical questions i’m not sure i can really come up with an answer for. a lot of people turn to god or religion to answer these big questions and i find myself doing the same. it's hard to watch things be out of your control but putting faith into a higher being helps to settle my mind and to feel like these big questions have some sort of answer. personally, i think about what it means to live a “good life” a lot. i often think about my day before i go to bed and i think about what i have done for the world to make it better or to advance my future. it's hard to do this today because it doesn't seem like you are making any progress, but eventually, i look back over the years and see some good and bad things that i have done. no one is perfect so there are always going to be some bad memories or moments but you have to look on the bright side of things and think positively in order to truly enjoy and live life. if you are always negative you will never see the enjoyment in life. just as i was saying before, you have to experience some bad things in order to enjoy the good moments, but that doesn’t mean you should dwell on the past. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). experiencing and exploring what a life well lived is vital to living out my mission statement. while career might not be the only factor of a life well-lived, it may feel like there's a lot of pressure in that area of people's lives. but my takeaway is that no matter how much you like or dislike a job or class, that experience factors into who you are. discerning who you are and how you want to live your life also requires you to ask others to help you. in week 5 i had a conversation with my mom that made me more self-aware and conscious of my actions (moreau fye week five). i have to be self-aware and aware of others in order to live out my mission to help other people. the relationships you build also contribute to your life’s experiences that shape who you are (moreau fye week seven). not only do these people help you discern your life, like my mom in the other example, but you go through life with these people and create memories together. i feel like the relationships i have in my life are vital. although i wouldn’t say that i am a dependent person, i would say that my friendships and relationships with family are some of the most important parts of my life. when i was leaving for college it was really hard because i realized how much i valued those relationships with those people. the thought of losing people was really difficult. i think that it made it difficult for me in the beginning of the school year https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ because i felt like there would not be people or relationships like those. although i was right, i would never have relationships like those ones. and over the break, i was talking with my friends from home and one of them said, “well of course there isn’t going to be friendships that are identical to ours and the ones you have here, you have different relationships for different reasons.” this really sucked for me because i realized that the friends and relationships i was making at notre dame had different meanings and reasons. the friendships that i had at home are very strong and i have a lot of trust in those people, as i have known them my whole life. but the people i have met here have a different kind of shared experience and i am glad that i am able to meet so many different people from different backgrounds. there are going to be a lot of obstacles along the journey both in my whole life and the rest of my time at notre dame, but there are many preventative measures that will guide me back towards my goals (moreau fye week six). the first is my faith. going to mass and the grotto has been a calming weekly tradition that helps to get my week off to a good start. the second is to take time to reflect. like i was talking about previously, self-reflection and meditation help to ground yourself and help to make the best decisions for yourself. i recently started practicing some of the things on the “ways to practice mindfulness” activity this semester (“ways to practice mindfulness” by campus ministry moreau fye week six). every weekday i get up early for my classes to work out. but this is complemented by ten minutes of yoga and at least 3 minutes of meditation/mindfulness. some days i wake up and don't feel like working out but i always do meditation or yoga at a minimum. this has really helped me reflect on my day, week, or month. so far these practices have allowed me to slow down for just a few minutes of the day. i really like doing this in the morning because it gets the juices flowing in my mind and often gets me excited for the day. one of the things on the activity was the headspace app, which i have used in the past. it is really helpful to have someone there or feel like someone is there to guide you through because if you just sit there in silence it is much harder to focus. this is one of the ways we can help cope with responding to suffering. it becomes really difficult to live in this world where we can see people suffering every single day. but i can also see how too much thought about the world could be a bad thing. sometimes in philosophy class or after class, i get into a spiral of thoughts that make me feel bad about how the world is. but rather than making people sad, we need to find new ways to “be awoken from [the] dormancy” of our dreams (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by carolyn nordstrom moreau fye week nine). i personally have struggled to come to terms with myself as i think i often set my expectations pretty high and when i don’t meet those expectations i begin to have the negative feelings i was just talking about (moreau fye week ten). for example, when playing golf in high school i was pretty set on trying to go to college for the sport. but over time and hundreds of rounds of misery, i decided to take an alternate path because i knew i would struggle through college golf. even the slightest mishap in a given round of golf would turn my mind into a whirlwind of concern and anxiety. i would overthink how that shot is affecting everything and because i was playing at a higher level i was overly aware of all the strategies and tactics i had learned. this came down to the half-shot, inch, even millimeter. i https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit was torn apart after every round and it became really difficult to love and forgive myself. these experiences account for only part of my life and i can sympathize with many people from this. i hope to embrace others for who they are so that they will realize their self-worth and be able to accept themselves. finally, i think one of the most important things to consider when trying to live out your mission statement is to keep an open mind. as we talked about in weeks 11 and 12, it is extremely important to show your support or allyship to other groups and individuals. we need to avoid “bubbles” and “echo chambers” and keep an open mind with everything we do. to live out my mission statement for the rest of my time at nd i think i should participate in more activities such as the allyship activity in week 12 (moreau fye week twelve). for my allyship activity, i attended the “vintage is the new black” fashion show at jordan hall atrium this past weekend. the event was organized by the black cultural arts council (bcac) at notre dame. i thought that the bcac did a great job of supporting the arts and african american rights and i hope to continue to serve as an ally to them in the future. i think going to events like this really opened me up to a whole other side of campus. i go to see people i might have never run into otherwise. in conclusion, i hope to live out my mission to “grow the good in business” for the rest of my time at notre dame and in my career. although i think the journey will be difficult, sticking to my faith, taking time to meditate and reflect, and keeping an open mind and heart will keep me on track. when i look back at my time at notre dame i don’t want to say i wish i did this or that; i hope to take every opportunity with every club, class, and, most importantly, relationship to grow myself and help to be positive in a constantly negative world. capstone integration she’s a work in progress how do i pursue a life well lived? as my response, for the time being, i have discerned it to be my mission statement, “to fully become who i am meant to be for myself and for others” (“qqc 13” by anjeleigh dela cruz moreau fye week thirteen). my statement consists of many things and responsibilities that i will hold myself accountable for during the rest of my time here at notre dame and for my entire life. however, i believe in answering this question honestly; one must reflect on their past and look towards their future. pico iyer said, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). when we allow ourselves to sit still, our mind quiets so that we can hear what our heart desires. through sitting still, i discerned my mission statement, and through sitting still again, may i fully understand the implications of my mission statement a total breakdown. three of the promises included in my mission statement are as written: to be persistent in my goals, refusal to give in to failure or lose sight of my goals when life becomes difficult; to take hold of the future, accomplish what my past self dreamed for me, resolve the regrets of my future self, and gain control of my present self; and to not let my worries control me, if i cannot get over my fear, i will just do it scared. all have one theme in common. do not give up despite what i have/will face; life goes on. fr. hesburgh once said, “i’m thinking about eternity. i’m looking forward to the next stage of my life” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). although fr. hesburgh is thinking about heaven, this also applies to me when i may face entering a new stage of my life such as starting college. no matter how uncertain the future seems, i must face it confidently and embrace it. i had no idea https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1fomrdfhv4cuidegn7ffgjax6k-kyv4asznlzhsbxazo/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 what to expect during my first year of college, but i made it through despite any obstacles or challenges. we must not spend so much time worrying about trivial things because looking at the big picture it does not matter. just as sister alethia said, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). looking back at what i believed to be the worst moments of my life in the past year, they seem lighter now. i lost sight of the big picture, thinking that my temporary pain would last forever. however, there is only one forever death. it is when we realize that are we able to pursue a life well-lived, or as i put it, “to be happy” (“qqc 5” by anjeleigh dela cruz moreau fye week five). two more promises i am held accountable to: to be in constant pursuit of knowledge, accept that i am constantly in a process of learning and to seek experiences and individuals that i can gain wisdom from; and to believe that no single moment defines me, my failures are not defeat, but a chance to start again with experience. during my time here at notre dame, i have realized that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i am not the same person who stepped foot on campus for the first time in august. i am a product of the unique experiences and individuals i have encountered during my time here. in this short time, i believe i have experienced more growth and change here than in my entire life. i can only hope to imagine how my life will shape me in the next three years and onward. five other promises i have built my mission statement upon: to be the person that someone needs, a comforting presence in times of grief and depression, a friend in times of https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sjq-a7ztmy2yca9ip5jx1a6n35q2zinmmasc19l0tjm/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ loneliness, and a companion to share times of joy with; to spread hope and joy, to be an advocate for self-love and acceptance and emphasize that it does get better; to be a light to others, a lifeline cast when others are struggling to stay afloat; to make others feel loved, a basic human need; and to make others feel known, that there is someone out there who cares for them. these promises are built upon how i may be able to serve and help others. to pursue a life well-lived, dr. kim suggests to us, “just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). the most selfish thing we can do for ourselves is to help others. i find that i often feel better when i do something in the interest of others compared to doing it for myself. i believe that one gains a genuine appreciation for serving others when one understands how it feels to be neglected just as pope francis quotes mother teresa, “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). over the past few months at college, i struggled as i came to understand what a lack of love feels like. however, i came to realize that “at one moment, she decided it was worth living. and by anything, if not everything, would she live a life well-lived.” (“integration three” by anjeleigh dela cruz moreau fye week eight). after fighting a long battle, i believe that i deserve to pursue a life well lived by serving others. the last three promises of my mission statement: to forgive others, understand that we are ever-changing and our emotions are instances where we succumb to our struggles; and to always treat others with kindness, respect, and dignity, the bare minimum. i have participated in many conversations about race at notre dame an institution still trying to improve its diversity. often it can be difficult to discuss because many of my colleagues benefit from a concept dr. robin calls “psychic freedom: because race is constructed as residing in people of color, whites https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143880 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dldyyguopwytdqfrf0iois8gtgtvwkbk3i318vgzcj8/edit don’t bear the social burden of race. we move easily through our society without a sense of ourselves as racialized.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). for this concept alone, it is essential to facilitate discussions about race. as notre dame is often referred to as a poorly diverse campus, “we need to ask whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well-thought-out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). it is easy to ignore rational thought in a disagreement between two conflicting parties when one is trapped in a feedback loop. in the past, i have taken it upon myself to step out of my comfort zone, or “feedback loop,” and try to empathize with those who see differently. this is why i have elected to join hawaii club board as our diversity council representative because, as mr. cole puts it, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i aspire to treat others with kindness and fairness in pursuing a life well-lived, i will continue to do so. my mission is to live a fulfilling life, guided by love for myself and others. by holding myself accountable to my mission statement and all of its promises, i may be able to pursue a life well-lived. as professor reifenberg states, “with respect and intelligence, humbly and without arrogance -with humble confidence or confident humility -we can be ambitious for making meaningful change.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). although i may struggle to uphold my mission statement at times, challenges will only strengthen my resolve. others will be able to see my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143969 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143990 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/144011 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 mission in action through my service and love for others. by reflecting on the past, celebrating the present, and building toward a better future i may pursue a life well-lived. michael comuniello moreau fye 28 april 2022 the journey to a life well lived personal mission statement: my mission is to always appreciate the small things in life. positivity and optimism are the biggest source of energy and joy in my life and it is important to me that i surround myself with people that have similar values and interests. i hope to make every place in my life one that i both enjoy and in which i am comfortable. i am a caring and reliable member of my family. to my siblings, i will be a loving, supportive sister and make continuous efforts to keep our connections strong. to their children, i will be a kind aunt that is generous, attentive, and prioritizes their excitement and happiness. i will be a good role model for them both academically and professionally, as well as personally and spiritually. to my parents, i will be a respectful and responsible daughter that always appreciates the love and support they have continuously extended to me. i will always be available to assist them, or even just to brighten their day in some small way whenever appropriate. for my friends, i will consistently be a loyal, dependable, and trustworthy person. i always appreciate the people that i can have genuine and honest conversations with, so i intend to be that person for others around me. i will be the person they can go to for advice and serious conversations, but also someone they can count on to make them laugh. i will be a good example of a person that leads a life of faith and someone that is confident in themselves and their place in life. as a student, i will continue to try my hardest at every given opportunity. i will maintain the motivation and determination that remains so important to me. in addition, i will seek to learn as growing in wisdom is what is truly valuable. my professors and mentors will recognize that i consistently put forth my best efforts and that i am a conscientious and respectful student. i take my personal mission statement incredibly seriously and i intend to fulfill the goals i have set in the outline above in a variety of specific, tangible ways. in the week 5 reflection, i was prompted to ask someone close to me what i value the most in life. my father, who is likely the person that knows me best in my life, responded that i appreciate “faith, knowledge, good jokes, and sunshine”. both him and i know that i am the best version of myself when i allow time to slow down and appreciate the little things in life, like a walk on a sunny day, a funny show, a good book, etc. i know i am happiest when i can engage in these types of activities and this makes me more willing to spread my positivity with those around me, thus i determined this goal should be at the center of my personal mission statement. some ways i will practice this is by making regular trips to the grotto and thanking god for all the blessings in my life, doing only a little homework on saturdays/sundays and taking time to do activities that i enjoy, and also by setting aside part of my day to get a meal with someone at least once a day. along similar lines, i will make practicing gratitude an important priority of my life. so often, we can tend to focus on the negative, but i find that when i can appreciate the small joys in life, i am not only happier, but also more intentional with my actions and thoughtful in my interactions with others. in the week 3 reflections, the article states, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” many people are preoccupied with multiple sources of temporary happiness, rather than finding a lasting, peaceful, and joyous state. one way i intend to shift to a more joyous state of living is by keeping a gratitude journal. i look forward to reflecting and seeing the many ways that i am blessed, and i know it will help me to live out my mission statement and to be a more peaceful, positive individual. as outlined in the reflections of week 1, the relationships we form with family and friends are incredibly meaningful and such an important aspect of our lives. in the article, iyer states, “keeping the sabbath — doing nothing for a while — is one of the hardest things in life for me; i’d much rather give up meat or wine or sex than the ability to check my emails or get on with my work when i want to”. although it is still important to me to perform well academically and professionally in the future, i am determined to not let the pressure of success distract me from my familial responsibilities. in order to do this, i have decided to set aside time for meaningful conversation with each of my family members. since it is also important to me that i make time to exercise, i have started calling my friends and family on my walk to/from the rockne memorial pool everyday. not only does this allow a much needed break from my schoolwork, but it also helps me to live up to the expectations outlined in my personal mission statement. i also hope to be an example of a faith-filled person. i was so impressed with and moved by jd kim’s story in the week six reflection. to see his strong faith despite his many struggles in life was incredibly inspiring and i hope to be a similar inspiration to those around me. in order to do this, i will continue to go to basilica mass every sunday during my time at notre dame and get more involved with campus ministry. i will also dedicate my time to serving others in various ways. the week 9 reflection pointed out an important difference between serving and helping, and i now understand that we must seek to also learn and appreciate those we assist in order to truly serve them. dr. reifenberg distinguishes the self-righteous helping from the genuine servitude saying, “the people i had so earnestly come to serve (and whose lives i had imagined transforming) had to take care of me. i wept, partly from the illness, but mostly out of frustration at how little the vision of me sick in bed resembled the one in my head of an autonomous me helping the needy them. that equation had been flipped”. in order to specifically carry out this part of my mission i will volunteer for the wishmakers on campus organization while maintaining this mindset. in addition, the reflections of week 12 also highlight the importance of learning from others while also sharing our own knowledge and it emphasizes the courage necessary to accomplish this. the article from this week states, “wherever we work we assist others not only to recognize and develop their own gifts but also to discover the deepest longing in their lives. and, as in every work of our mission, we find that we ourselves stand to learn much from those whom we are called to teach”. i intend to practice this through continuing my working with the engineering leadership council on campus. i am the junior director of transfer students, so not only will i seek to create programming that is helpful to the new transfers with the feedback they give me, but i will also share my own experiences of notre dame/ any advice i have in order to create a positive, meaningful experience for both of us. it is also a mission of mine to maintain my status as a motivated, successful student. in the week 4 reflections, the article stated, “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” it is so important to focus on the things that bring you joy and fulfillment, since that is what will ultimately lead you to success in your major/career. i hope to also form connections with my professors and enjoy the process of learning, and i intend to do this by attending office hours. in conclusion, after having set my expectations for a life well lived, i now look forward to carrying out all the steps i have decided necessary to take in order to reach them. works cited (“why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com)” by pico iyermoreau fye week one) (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three) (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame” meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four) (“week five discernment conversation activity” -conversation with thomas bowenmoreau fye week five) (“why does god allow suffering? grotto network” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six) (“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, january 25, 2021.docx google docs” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine) (“2: mission // congregation of holy cross (holycrosscongregation.org”, congregation of holy cross mission statementmoreau fye week twelve) moreau integration one leathers 1 professor chan moreau october 11, 2021 understanding my root belief through moreau having root beliefs in our lives is the key to staying on a righteous path to success. root beliefs give significance to our time on earth and purpose to everything we do. without root beliefs, we risk losing our own beliefs amidst the vast oceans of opinions and thoughts constantly interjected into our lives. my root belief above all others is being genuinely kind to everyone i meet by living an honest and open-minded life. being genuinely kind to another person is something that many people miss in their day-to-day interactions when life can push our patience to the wayside in our quest for success. it is important not to forget the human beings around us. genuine kindness stems from the search for goodness in yourself and the others around you. taking the time to stop and think about our actions and environment is a helpful tool to achieve this. as stated in week two with the timeless example of adam one and adam two, sometimes our dreams can drown out the pleading voices around us calling for a change ("should you live for your resume or your eulogy" by david brooks moreau fye week 2). david brooks introduces the idea that maybe we should start striving for the character virtues spoken in eulogies instead of seeing life as one extensive resume. i believe that focusing on this idea and having a concern for others is the first step towards being a kinder person. the next step i’ve found that makes a kind person is being open-minded. being open-minded with new people can help break any barriers that may stand in the way of a kind leathers 2 relationship. too often, i accidentally find myself jumping to conclusions about people that impact the start of our relationship negatively. these are known as implicit bias, a subconscious bias that can be hard to examine unless we are truly honest with ourselves because "...it isn't nice to think we aren't very nice." (how to think about 'implicit bias' by by keith payne, laura niemi, john m. doris moreau fye week 7). the self-examination process can be stressful, but its payoff is insurmountable. i found that in my time away from home, i’ve been introduced to many diverse people from all walks of life. i have met elite sons and daughters of successful business tycoons from savant students whose parents struggle to make ends meet, along with people from different races, creeds, and nationalities. what i love about notre dame is being proven wrong day in and day out about the relationships i forge. here, under this dome, i cannot tell the rich from the poor, where someone is from, or judge their intelligence from only a few conversations. it is a campus full of good, well-rounded people, and i believe the student body of notre dame embodies the timeless saying of "you can't judge a book by its cover." i believe viewing the rest of the world through the same ambiguous lens i view students through can help destroy my implicit bias giving me an open-minded life to be a kind human being. another key aspect to forging kind and honest relationships with our peers is to be vulnerable. being vulnerable can aid in destroying our implicit biases by freeing ourselves from our own subconscious beliefs. i believe that implicit biases act as a shield against the unknown, walls of defense we build to protect ourselves from unfamiliar things and people. an elementary example would be a child not wanting to try a food because of its appearance. they do not know what they are missing until the first bite is taken, and only then can they let their taste form their opinion. we must have the same vulnerability as a kid trying a new food if we wish to have open-minded, kind relationships. it should be our experiences with people that form opinions. of leathers 3 course, every experience must be taken with a grain of salt, as we cannot solely judge a person based on a few interactions. to understand the whole of someone's life—the good and the bad—we must feel emotions we do not want to feel. in speaker brené brown's case, she states, "my mission to control and predict had turned up the answer that the way to live was with vulnerability." ("the power of vulnerability" by brené brown moreau fye week 1). as a culture, we attempt to move further into a dystopian state where everything is made perfect through control. we do not have to have the answers to every problem presented. still, we must be vulnerable enough to feel the emotions that these problems offer to relate to others who might have experienced similar pains. no relationship will center around talking about only the "goods" in life, and if it did, it would not be a relationship but rather a simple conversation. the power of vulnerability lies in the fact that we cannot feel the highs without experiencing the lows, and by closing our doors to each other, we lead a numbing life full of dull relationships and emotions. i believe another facet to building honesty and kindness into relationships is recognizing what not to do through analyzing toxic relationships. a toxic relationship is overly demanding to one member. i believe kind relationships are built on a zero-expectation basis. expectations can lead to peer pressure, a common trait of a toxic relationship. if pressure is introduced to a relationship, it is no longer honest as the actual motive of the relationship is clouded beneath a layer of expectations. the only acceptable expectation we can have is respect for opinions and nothing else. understanding toxicity is the key never to let ourselves be the toxic ones in the relationship. summarized well by olivia t. taylor, toxic relationships include the following: conversations only include negatives your opinions are not listened to leathers 4 you are separately bailed on you are subject to listen to gossip about others you are used to getting what the other person wants ("5 signs your in a toxic relationship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week 4). acknowledging what a toxic relationship is and then making the necessary changes to our lives is another step we must take to form relationships rooted in kindness, honesty, and inclusiveness. with the culmination of all these tools, being kind, honest, open-minded, vulnerable, and non-toxic, we can take a step back and realize the power we have to shape others' journeys. ultimately, this is the point of building relationships. sometimes drawing from our own experiences can help us realize what has shaped us and who we have shaped along the way (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week 6). for example, i was given the opportunity to coach a youth flag football team last year. the boys i was given lacked discipline but through weeks of relationship building with my twelve players, i was able to instill discipline and respect into every one of them. they also formed me by showing me my weakness, and by allowing me to grow as a coach. i became more patient and understanding as a result of working getting to coach my players. recalling these experiences of where i’m from i believe no person is static, and our journeys are subject to change with each interaction. there are many in need of a helping hand, and with just a few simple tools as stated before, we can help. as stated by father kevin grove, "we cannot love the god we do not see, we do not love the brother we do see." ("two notre dames: your holy cross education" by father kevin grove mye week 5). essentially, he states that we cannot say we are kind if we forget the men and women who need help. being a force for good, notre dame's ultimate goal for its student leathers 5 body, stresses the importance of using our skills to change the world. through this pursuit is where we will find avenues in which to build kind relationships. root beliefs are what make us who we are. i believe that i have been given the tools to change myself and strengthen my core root belief: to be kind to everyone i meet by living an honest and open-minded life. keeping this belief intact is my anchor to an ever-changing world. staying true to myself, being honest, vulnerable, and introspective are the keys to embodying my root belief. week 13: integration two ladd 1 mr. drew espeseth moreau first year experience 3 december 2021 encountering change: a reflection on my first semester during the final weeks of moreau, i continued to deepen my self-knowledge in relation to my personal development and entry into a new chapter of my life. after interacting with others and reflecting internally on my first semester experiences, i have expanded upon the ways i respond to my surroundings. by sharing a few, i hope to reveal more about my character and the development that i have had since coming to college. i feel that i have grown in many ways throughout my first semester, especially in terms of the level of significance i place on things. for example, ever since i was young, i have been a high achieving student who cares deeply about her academic record and performance. after coming to notre dame, i have had some setbacks in terms of grades and exams that have left me feeling disappointed and, at times, unworthy. week nine’s lesson on imposter syndrome came at a moment when i was particularly feeling this way. as elizabeth cox says in her video, “many people suffering from imposter syndrome fear that if they ask about their performance, their fears will be confirmed” (“what is imposter syndrome?” by elizabeth cox -moreau fye week nine). i felt this directly related to me and my tendency to avoid talking about my shortcomings or apprehensions for fear that they may come true or that people may think less of me. reflecting on it more, i learned that talking to people about these topics actually makes me feel better. i have tried to open up to my friends and family more, since at the end of the day they are ready and willing to help me. additionally, i have learned to place less of my worth solely on my https://youtu.be/zquxl4jm1lo ladd 2 academic performance, as i recognize there is more value in how i treat others and what i achieve as a holistic person. though i have come to this realization about academic performance, there have been certain things that were once “black and white” to me that now are more nuanced and complex. an example of this is in terms of diversity of thought and opinion. i have met people with many different opinions since coming to notre dame, and sometimes i do not always agree with them. however, i have come to recognize that it is important to see the value in a differing opinion. a particular quote from week ten of moreau when we discussed how we can respond to challenges in our community reminds me of this idea: “both sides call for change, but each believes it’s the other side that must change ("wesley theological seminary 2012 commencement address" by fr. john jenkins, c.s.c. -moreau fye week ten). though fr. jenkins is referencing politics, i feel this quote is applicable in any setting where there can be disagreement. everyone wants peace, but they do not want to alter their perspectives or viewpoints in order for this change to occur. this inherent stubbornness that exists within each of us is prohibiting us from choosing love over hate. we must be willing to put down our egos and make the change necessary for success, even if that means changing our perspectives a bit. i have tried to be more cognizant of how i respond to different opinions, and feel that i do a good job of seeing both sides of any argument. going along with this attitude of openness and self-reflection, i have asked myself some important questions in regards to how i am treating others. i constantly reflect on if i am taking the time to understand those around me, especially if they are different from me. for example, there was a time that my dorm had a multicultural training night where many of the issues brought up were only applicable to those in the non-white community. i felt i had little to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/modules/items/108027 ladd 3 contribute to the discussion, since i mainly reaffirmed the support i had for those around me and listened to them talk about the personal effects these issues had on them. i left with the fear that i did not say or do enough to show the people in my group i cared and wanted them to feel heard. however, at this time i was reminded of a particular quote from week eleven of moreau when we talked a lot about strengthening bonds with others: “the story of race has many voices; understanding it begins with listening” (“with voices true snapshot summary” by klau center archive on race -moreau fye week eleven). with this video in mind, i realized that just by simply listening to the people in my group, i exhibited tolerance and support for them. even though i could not directly relate to their experiences, i am glad i gained a new perspective. oftentimes, people feel that there is not a way that they can help solve bigger issues in the world, but the truth is that many solutions start with listening. i will try to keep this in mind as i continue through notre dame and encounter many similar situations where lending an ear can make all the difference. as a whole, the idea of having and maintaining hope is something that has become much more clear to me since coming to college. i find that i have so much to look forward to in life, and remembering this can foster an attitude of hope that helps me through difficult times. however, it has also become clear to me that difficult times are necessary for growth. we talked about this concept in week twelve of moreau after we read a chapter of the screwtape letters by c.s. lewis. though in a satirical way, this chapter emphasized the value of difficult times: “it is during such trough periods, much more than during the peak periods, that it is growing into the sort of creature he wants it to be” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis -moreau fye week twelve). screwtape is essentially saying that he has observed how humans experience a greater level of change and growth during difficult or “trough” periods in their life, versus during the https://voicestrue.nd.edu https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28315/files/191230?module_item_id=108039 ladd 4 positive or “peak” periods of life. in turn, this forms us into the kinds of people god wants us to be. i think this speaks to the idea that we can learn the most from our setbacks and our failures, rather than when everything is easy and smooth sailing. we should embrace our shortcomings for the learning experiences that they are, rather than dwell on their negativity. if everything was always easy, we would never have the opportunity to grow. for this reason, we should be filled with hope that we can come back stronger and wiser from the difficult moments in our life. i have tried to have this attitude when i am faced with setbacks or during times where i feel there is little hope to be had. these realizations i have had since coming to school are ones that i plan to keep with me throughout the rest of my college career. though i have been able to come to these conclusions through responding to my experiences, moreau has helped me understand and connect them to other aspects of my life. placing less of my worth on academic performance, recognizing the value in diversity of opinion, lending a listening ear to those around me, and having hope amidst difficult times are all lessons that i am glad to have learned. i have enjoyed participating in moreau this semester, and look forward to the insight that i will gain from the second semester portion of the course. capston integration due 4/29/22 the end of the beginning life is defined by journeys. beginnings and endings, new chapters unfolding with the closing of others, ships sailing to make room for more to come in. it is easy to lose direction in the midst of perpetual change, even when it comes to the most important journey: the journey of life. the moreau first year experience has taught me invaluable lessons, thinking not just about my short time here at notre dame but my future beyond the dome. “what is a life well lived?” is a question that has remained in my mind since the very first week of moreau, and i truly believe that keeping this question close to my heart will be how i achieve what it asks. my mission statement explains exactly how i want to approach life through pursuing true passion, which will be strengthened by the people i surround myself with at notre dame. and through these relationships and people that challenge me to be the best version of myself, i will succeed when times get tough and i face failures throughout life. “there are countless measures of success and a life well-lived, but to me, it is best summarized by how people remember you. a life well-lived is one in which you impact countless lives, all in ways for the better. you impact others in ways that no one else can, leaving a mark on the world that burns eternally bright. and you do this by experiencing all that life has to offer, the good equally with the bad. as we discussed in class, wisdom is a product of experience, and this case is no different. we must experience suffering, embrace humanity, and act with courage. it is only through all of these that we will come out as the powerful force for good that fr. sorin wants each and every one of us to be. so yes, we will face highs and lows. we will suffer. we will cry. but with each moment, we will climb the mountain of life and be better for it. my mission statement is to embrace the climb of life, accepting it entirely with the knowledge it will transform us into unforgettable streaks of the earth”. there is no doubt that my mission statement will be remolded, reformed, and refined as my life progresses, but what it currently stands for is the foundation that i will direct my life upon. “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes -moreau fye week three). i want to be a source of joy to the world, in a way that can be found both in myself and others. spreading joy is what is at the heart of every mission statement, and i only hope that i am able to proudly express it for the rest of my life. although my time as a first year student at the university of notre dame comes to an end, i am confident that the relationships i have built will transform and amplify my mission over the remaining three years. it is crazy to think that mere months ago i was absolutely terrified at the uncertainty that college represented. was i going to like my roommate? would i even be able to make new friends? i was even worried at the thought of having to do laundry on my own for the first time! “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” ( "navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). as expected, all i needed to do was put myself out, and i would be fine. fast forward to today and i am surrounded by a group of people that i can honestly see being the godparents of my children one day. these are the people that will make me strive to follow my mission, as i owe it to both them and myself to be the best version of myself. “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community” ("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10). the truth is that i am made exponentially better by the diversity of people around me and all of the amazing qualities that they add to my life. so although a year has already passed, i am excited to see all of the wonderful ways that i will transform into a better man over the remaining three years with my peers. it would be delusional to say that things will always be going perfect in my life, and it will be hardest to follow my mission and pursuit of joy when i am facing failure and setbacks. it is easy to get down on yourself and feel sorry, but it is so crucial to remain conscious and perceptive to the bigger picture. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, tedmoreau fye week one). the entire goal of a mission statement is to take in the larger picture, and i hope to always have the clarity to know that through good times and bad. remaining optimistic is something that i have learned in my time here. always looking at the negatives is such an easy way to get sucked into unhealthy mindsets that will only lead to further negatives. “asking why appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems and place blame instead of moving forward in a healthy and productive way” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fy experience week six). no matter the failure or setback, there is always a way back, and it starts with a positive attitude. as my first year at notre dame comes to an end, i am extremely grateful for the moreau first year experience and professor taylor. i can honestly say that going to class every tuesday was the highlight of my week and provided me an immense sense of serenity. college is a stressful place, but each class left me feeling calm and confident that everything will be ok and work itself out. although our classtimes have ended, i will never forget the tremendous impact that professor taylor and the rest of my classmates have bestowed upon me. thank you from the bottom of my heart. microsoft word moreau integration 4.docx a life well-lived is one where we respect others by i believe that pursuing a life well lived will be heavily influenced by the mission statement which i wrote in moreau week 13. i said, “i want to be the person that everyone wants to be around” (“qqc 13” by – moreau fye week 13). i plan on taking care of myself both mentally and physically and working to lift up the people around me. to truly have a life well-lived, i believe that the world should be better for having me in it; therefore, i would like to touch as many lives as i can. having a life well-lived, first, depends on taking care of oneself. you cannot have an impact on others if you don’t have a clear sense of identity and purpose. self-reflection is an important part of this. in an article on ted, pico iyer wrote, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). i think it is very important to take time to rest and enjoy ourselves because life is about so much more than stress and work. however, when we look at ourselves, it is important that we do it in the right way. tasha eurich says that “evidence shows the simple act of translating our emotions into language — versus simply experiencing them — can stop our brains from activating our amygdala” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). what this means is that, if we are not careful of how we are introspective, we can actually prevent our bodies from processing emotions. we have to make sure that we ask questions about what is happening to us and not questions about why is something happening to us. you cannot live a good life alone. throughout life, it is important to make connections and get to know the people around you. this is a nice feature of the notre dame community. through irish compass, you can make connections with people in your career fields and meet people who can mentor you to living a good life (irishcompass moreau fye week 5). the meruelo center for career development also offers such opportunities to make connections and emphasizes the importance of allowing your life to move organically. the center says that, “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). it is important that we know that we don’t have to follow one path. each of has our own path that is not determined by our past but on what we do in the future. the most important part of a life well-lived is to impact others. we need to be leaders in our community who respect all people and treat everyone with dignity. “we have to be willing to hear what others need and to give ourselves in response even when our attempt to respond may not be appreciated” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). i believe that what father himes is saying is that we need to listen to and respect what others have to say; however, we have an obligation to respond to them honestly, even if they do not appreciate our answer. he is emphasizing that we need to balance the needs and beliefs of others with our own convictions. father hesburgh was an excellent example of this balance. he fought very hard to ensure that the world was a better place when he left it, and he worked to treat everyone with respect. one of the things that made father hesburgh so successful in changing the world was his respect for all sides of a debate. “true leadership has been the people who could bridge two ideologies” (“hesburgh” by barca and o’malley – moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh got people, who would normally never associate, to work together and, in doing so, was able to solve some of the world’s toughest problems. it is extremely hard to bridge an ideology gap. especially in today’s era of social media, where we are often surrounded by opinions that we agree with. we need to take a special effort to understand the opinions of those who disagree with us. dr. paul blaschko says, “we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well thought out, whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of an echo chamber” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). if we really take steps to understand our opponents and view them as partners to value, not enemies to defeat, we can really begin to take steps to heal some of the great divisions within this country. so often, all it takes is just getting to know someone who thinks differently than you. find out what you have in common because it is so hard to disparage someone you know. father boyle talks about how enemy gang members became friends while working for him. he advises us to, “close both eyes; see with the other one” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week 7). he is telling us to forget what we assume other people and truly get to know them. he believes that we will be unable to dislike them after that. the university understands the importance of bringing people together from different backgrounds, that is why we have a class of such diverse backgrounds and experiences. i think that du lac mentions something very powerful: “the university of notre dame strives for a spirit of inclusion among the members of this community for distinct reasons articulated in our christian tradition” (du lac: a guide to student life – moreau fye week 10). i agree with this sentiment that, as christians, we are called to treat everyone with respect and dignity. i believe that the community we have here offers a great opportunity to begin practicing living a life welllived. it is one thing to talk about living a life well-lived and another to actually live out your goals. the holy cross constitution says, “for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (holy cross mission statement – moreau fye week 12). the most important part of a life well lived is action. sometimes things don’t go as we plan; however, the important thing is that we keep moving forward and making the effort to do the right thing. when steve reifenberg went to south american to work at an orphanage, he expected to change these people’s lives. however, he ended up getting extremely ill. “the people i had so earnestly come to serve (and whose lives i had imagined transforming) had to take care of me” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by prof steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). the people he went to help ended up serving him. even though he failed to accomplish his goal, he learned valuable life lessons that can help him to make a difference in the future. therefore, i believe that we should always strive to do the right thing and we should learn from our mistakes. moreau capstone integration assignment limon 1 april 29, 2022 moreau capstone integration assignment my road to a life well lived as i come to the end of the first year of college, i am amazed when i look back at all the things i have been through and where those things will take me in the rest of my college experience, and ultimately in the rest of my life. when i first came to college, i thought i knew exactly what i wanted to do and how i was going to do it. it wasn’t until very recently that i realized that i don’t have everything figured out the way that i thought that i did. however, i’ve come to terms with that realization as i’ve continued to navigate my life to figure out what my life mission could be. towards the beginning of my spring semester, i had a conversation with one of my best friends from back home which was very insightful in learning about how i was being perceived by the people i cared about. ( discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week 5) i further analyzed this conversation with my best friend in a paper i wrote halfway through the semester. (integration 3moreau fye week 8) for this assignment i wrote a eulogy from the perspective of my best friend. something that i really wanted to convey was how confident i was in what i was pursuing in college. when i spoke to my friend, i asked her what she thought my passions were from her point of view. my best friend, dafne, spoke about my passions toward social justice and i was very pleased with her answer. the reason that i felt so pleased about her answer was because when i first got to college and decided to study political science, i did so with a very clear plan of going to law school afterwards and working in social justice after college. i felt good that my best friend could so clearly see this as my passion because it meant limon 2 that other people around me knew and understood exactly what i wanted to do. however, i have come to the realization that i don't know exactly what i’m going to end up doing yet because i am still constantly changing and learning about my interests. despite this, i know that some things have and will continue to stay constant. throughout my moreau class, i have been able to develop a mission statement in which i have solidified what is most important to me as well as some values i will continue to follow in my journey. (mission statementmoreau fye week 13) some things that i will always hold dear is the importance of a community in my life in the form of friends and family. furthermore, i know that my ultimate goal in life is to be happy. while i still hold passions in social justice and i know that’s the area i want to work in, i no longer have a clear linear path towards this goal. i don’t know exactly how i'll get there, but i know that i will eventually meet my goals if i keep persisting. in my journey towards a life well lived, specially as a first year college student, i have definitely faced moments where i asked myself what i was doing. in some of these moments i felt the most lost i have ever felt in my life. fall semester was especially hard for me. i was on my own for the very first time in my life and incredibly homesick with practically nobody i could really call a friend yet. to make matters worse, i was taking one of the worst classes i could’ve signed up for which made me miserable just thinking about it. if there’s one thing that time and class taught me was how to respond to suffering. in a grotto video titled “5 minutes”, one statement that stuck with me was “suffering is part of our lives, it is always there. but it is how to respond to suffering with god.” (“5 minutes” by the grottomoreau fye week 6) now, i may not be the most religious person, but i learned how to respond to my suffering because i pushed through the countless times i cried and seeked help when i needed the extra support. i truly believe that this experience made me so much stronger because i saw how low my mental limon 3 health could get, and it was miserable, but once i emerged from it i felt like i could get through anything in life. one thing that i've learned in my time here is the importance of solitude. as i mentioned above, a lot of my unhappiness stemmed from feeling alone. eventually, i learned that sometimes it's okay to be alone. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week 1) i think this has helped me become more comfortable with myself and appreciate my own company more than i ever did. i feel much more confident in my abilities to get through obstacles alone when i need to do so. another insecurity that has stemmed from my struggles so far is having to constantly ask myself if i am doing what i'm meant to do and if i'm doing enough. as mentioned before, i am currently studying political science. it was what i first set out to do and i still love my major. however, i cannot deny that there hasn’t been a moment where i have asked myself whether political science was for me and what i could even do with a political science degree. in one of the readings i did for my moreau course i read, “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4) slowly, i've learned that so far, this is the best major for me because this is what i want to study. i genuinely don’t see myself studying anything else and being as interested as i currently am. furthermore,another thing i read was, “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us. it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it's very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!”. (“three key questions” by father michael himesmoreau week 3) while i love my major, questioning it as the right path has allowed me to look into other things i may want to do. i recently added a latino studies minor to my curriculum and limon 4 am very excited to add even more things and expand my knowledge in different areas. dissatisfaction allows us to do more than what we originally set out to do, and that's okay. in continuation with learning how to be okay with being alone, i have also learned about the significance of accompaniment and community. while making friendships didn’t just occur out of thin air, the friends that i have made so far have been my source of motivation in continuing this school year. i remember last semester when it was really bad, i had a particular friend who did simple acts like having meals with me which made such a huge difference in my mental health. i soon realized that although i felt alone, i was never truly alone. there were people around me willing to accompany me in my times of need. “ one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9) the community i have built at notre dame is perhaps one of the most important communities in my life right now. i’ve also had to learn how to deal with new communities of people that i didn't know about before. i went to a predominantly minority school and lived in a hispanic neighborhood. because of this, i wasn’t exposed to white people and had a huge culture shock when i first got here. when watching a documentary on the former president of notre dame, father hesburgh, he said “at a university, you can’t censor ideas if they disagree with your own”. (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2) while many people have ideas that i may not necessarily agree with, it’s still important to learn about the way that they may think or do things. “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense in limon 5 how someone may reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11) by surrounding ourselves with communities that differ from our own, we are able to embrace the differences and learn how to build relationships with one another. i am impressed by the way notre dame has encouraged me and my peers to integrate with one another. “this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the u.s. today if one ignores group power relations.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelomoreau fye week 10) i appreciate the way the courses i have taken at notre dame have acknowledged the disadvantages that certain communities have. i’ve learned so much about communities so far and i am excited to learn more in the next couple of years. so now i am left with the question of what i am to do after my first year of college. one thing i will take with me is the privilege i have to be able to obtain an education from notre dame. pope francis once said, “the more powerful you are, the more your actions will have an impact on people, the more responsible you are to act humbly. if you don’t, your power will ruin you, and you will ruin the other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week 7) knowledge is power. i have a responsibility to use the power i obtain for good things, hence my passion in social justice work. “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean marcus colemoreau fye week 12) i will pursue a life well-lived by taking the lessons i have learned throughout my first year of college and applying them to my future. ultimately, all i want to do is live a happy life limon 6 surrounded by people that i care about and doing what i am passionate about. so far, i have managed to do just that and i can only hope that i will continue to do so. moreau capstone inegration 4/20/22 capstone integration keys to a good life my time at notre dame has been extremely busy as i try to balance academics, clubs, sleep, and a social life. my first-year engineering class offered extra credit for doing a relaxing activity, such as walking or meditating, and this allowed me to slow down my life a little bit. “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call,” and i find myself always on my phone or working on something, so that class activity helped me take a step back and address how i am living my life (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). i plan to incorporate more designated time to reflect on my life and take a step back from the busy schedule i usually find myself in. i also found myself stressed about choosing a major, but taking time to calm myself definitely helps. “putting aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major” helped me choose a major, since not everyone does exactly what their degree is after graduation ( "navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i plan to make progress towards living a life of balance that involves both work and rest through designating time for rest. at the first rocketry team meeting i attended, i was expecting the majority of the leaders to be men, but as a pleasant surprise, the leaders were actually an equal representation of men and women. this made me feel more comfortable pursuing a degree in engineering, and i am thankful that “notre dame went co-educational” while father hesburgh was president because women have the opportunity to pursue a notre dame education (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau week two). getting to know the seniors and meeting some alumni in my major was very interesting and helped me decide on aerospace engineering. my uncertainty about my major lessened “by identifying people who majored in the subjects you https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149863 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 are considering and are now using those majors in diverse ways” (irish compass activity by moreau instructors moreau fye week five). i plan to be a leader on an engineering team so that i can continue the tradition of women becoming learning, educating, and leading. i feel joy in the friendships i have made at notre dame, and this is different from happiness because my friends and i help each other grow to live a good life together. i can be happy one moment and sad in the next, but i value the joy of growing strong relationships with others over temporary happiness. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life,” and i think that focusing on joy rather than temporary happiness will lead me closer to living a good life ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau week three). through recognizing this value of mine, i have become more self-aware of the actions that i am taking to make my life well-lived. “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives,” so that is why i think i should aim to be somewhat self-aware of my actions, so that my relationships can thrive (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i plan to reflect on my actions each night so that i can do my best to treat others in a positive way. there were some days this school year where i would just focus on getting to the end of the day because of all the tests, labs, and homework that i had to do that day. looking back, i wish i had been more aware about the benefits of the experiences i was getting. maybe i forgot whatever i learned, but i did not forget some of the people i met. “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions,” and i think it is important to recall this so that we can be aware of https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149919 the small interactions we get with people everyday (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven). this relates to the question: “when the last chapter of my life is written, how do i want to be remembered?” because i want to be remembered for being a loving person and be known for appreciating others (“integration three assignment” by moreau instructors moreau fye week eight). i plan to be mindful of the interactions i have with others everyday and value the time i spend with others. simple things that my dorm community helps me with has made my experience here great, such as someone letting me use their laundry detergent and a friend helping me study math. these acts of kindness are a key part in my vision of a good life. to “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” creates a meaningful and life-giving community ( “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine). this kindness also spreads to the inclusion that seniors in my dorm have shown me. “the university of notre dame strives for a spirit of inclusion among the members of this community for distinct reasons articulated in our christian tradition,” and i hope to contribute to that spirit of inclusion through helping and loving others (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame authors moreau week ten). i plan to perform acts of kindness to help build a loving community at notre dame and wherever else i may be living. i have been impressed by the connection notre dame students have with each other regardless of their political views. growing up in southern california, it was often impossible to ignore the political tensions constantly weighing on people’s minds. “we treat politics like entertainment, following the latest updates like we follow our favorite sports teams,” and i think we should aim to see the value in the person before engaging in discussion about politics https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149950 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau week eleven). through recalling that we are all equally human, i can live a good life by seeing the good in others. “our mutual respect and shared undertaking should be a hopeful sign of the kingdom, and they are when others can behold how we love one another,” and through this, the entire world can become better (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by holy cross authors moreau week twelve). i plan to treat others with respect so that myself and the people around me can have the best circumstances to live a good life. my experience at notre dame has been challenging, but i was especially challenged (and continue to be) by my linear algebra class. at one professor’s office hours, there is a strong sense of solidarity and togetherness that helps me push through the harder topics. a“ sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good” helped me through my tough class, and without this community and professor to help me, my experience would have been very different (“notre dame mission statement” by notre dame authors moreau week thirteen). standing in solidarity with others has been important throughout my life, and i want to continue to form community with others so that we can all move towards our goals. the moreau fye class has helped me reflect on the type of life i want to have, and the type of experience i want to have at notre dame. i think that helping and respecting others plays an important role in the way i want to spend my life. this class has provided me with many meaningful experiences and friends, and i am glad to share in the same goals of helping others and building community as this class. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ prest espeseth ir 28 february 2022 curating a good eulogy all i do is move around. my whole life, i have always enjoyed my time in a certain location, but there has always been the question: what’s next? when are we moving after this? where are we going, and how will i adjust there, make friends, and like it compared to where i am now? it feels like i do this life thing at a million miles per hour, and i think college has made me slow down and realize that this is not a sustainable way to live. i want to be remembered as someone who lived her life deliberately and truthfully, as someone who cared deeply about her relationships and had a positive impact wherever she went. by starting now, i feel like it is not too late to make this adjustment, and that this type of change could be good for me. anna margaret prest was a tall, commanding, sometimes domineering woman. however, once one took the time to get to know her and her slightly complex personality, they would be rewarded for their efforts to find that she was a genuine and loving individual. she was an asshole, but sometimes she was a funny asshole. anna loved spending time with her family and chosen family, especially her best friends mary and elizabeth, whom she met while at notre dame. upon commissioning, she married her college sweetheart. she served her career in the military, first as a naval flight officer for ten years and then as a foreign affairs officer in japan for the next twenty. after she retired, anna enjoyed working out every day and going for long walks with her great danes, bernard and stanley. she prioritized being outside and in nature, which made her feel calm and centered. she passed peacefully in her sleep at the age of 100, approximately four minutes after midnight on her birthday, because she was steadfastly determined to be a centenarian. since getting to college, i have found that time management is one of my biggest challenges in living a good, balanced life. a quote i found shocking from the article i read in moreau week one was “it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call.” i often feel a sense of exhaustion after meeting with someone or talking for long periods of time. it benefits me to take breaks from my phone and disconnect from the online world to take in the physical one around me. additionally, i have come to accept that i can dabble in a bunch of areas and really explore in college to see what i truly enjoy. fr. hesburgh is a great example of this in the film hesburgh, which profiles his life as not just a priest and president of notre dame, but also highlights his roles as a diplomat and mediator. being an ever-changing person with a dynamic personality is something that excites me and that i hope to incorporate into my own life. another big question that has taken up a large amount of my brain power this semester is, “how do i find what brings me joy?” one tactic i have taken from fr. himes’ publication is, “where do you ask more and more questions?” i definitely have surprised myself with how much i enjoy my theology courses and am now adding the subject as a minor, much to my delight. if you had told me 2 years ago that i would be taking numerous courses in theology and getting excited about the topic, i probably would have called you a liar. similarly, one thought i found interesting from the career center article was, “put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major.” this is especially true for me because since i know my initial career path post-college, i don’t really have to worry about my major. this has taken a lot of stress off of me and allowed me to pursue what i am genuinely passionate about. the people in my life have had the most influence on my life so far. one of these individuals is mary cannon, my dear friend in nrotc, who feels like a sister to me. she has been a grounding force in my freshman college experience with her level head and practical approach to every problem i have. when we sat down to have an honest conversation about our relationship for week six of moreau, it was very healthy and productive. she told me how selfless i was, which felt really good to hear because i am always petrified of coming off as selfish or self-centered. also, mary told me i have an ambitious desire to be successful without stepping on or using others, which stuck with me. her calling me out on my impulsive behavior, however, has been a wake-up call for me and something i have been working on for the last few weeks. finally, for week seven i found myself wondering how i could find more people like mary (key word “like” because there is no one that tops her). after reading the excerpt from tattoos on the heart, i realized that you don’t just seek out these people; they fall into your lap. i want to be like the waitress who treated the gang members like regular customers, who they described as “jesus in an apron.” sometimes all it takes is a couple seconds to impact someone in a positive way, and i want to have that effect on people. through self-reflection throughout this semester, i have found that the less “looking forward” i do, the happier i am. living in the moment and taking care of my relationships is how i want to look back on my existence and define how i lived my own unique good life: authentically, laughing constantly, and taking obstacles as they come. i hope at the end of my time on earth i can look back and not have any regrets or “what if” moments. i think taking some chances and being forgiving with myself is the healthiest way for me to live my life. weeks cited week 1 “why we need to slow down our lives” pico iyer https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2 hesburgh film https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzlnbsiweirfjfi9myeajqvitkgqem2jqnvobtnjahaj1%2fu6lbx9hejvperj1mrhm9%2burytryohp43b6av4aibfmz2o2jkuz5gwchjid9mje9umwz4d5ejekkob5jr0yjcx4aksk9zh1ow4l5kqnzdu5qz0vdbrdsnmlo8kq7os4fv1b1e2fwtdzjkpldxlundmkome9k5euiygblo3hjvav7epuibunzkipa1gbqde4xmccdvu4vx336uvukb8thze9%2fpatiw%2bbwhcntoat1zhtzexqpsskkx%2f1q5jzdfhgdal0qfr2zbqrbupsjlr3i%2bekszzelosne%2fm5ictnapwf2f1yxyipediw4wo1ntxyjdhxvcdjw%2bkb7ct9tenyueyfefgbnc%2fod39ugxgbmc9wq3qkyrxyckgrtek0o7%2ftmq8unhm13ek0cvtd%2f7dcfokwyx9ij%2fgpk7ojexe%2bdz7lsflfmzhwfb5dwzdoj9vzxk%2bbt86y379t8g4%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=ucunpho%2fddl79ynfc5xcvoiejfxiupg4ueobcokdu4c4tlhfm5zjiqdguuvbemeidqwuwqcgmk%2f89gkvripc3y3i%2flj40m4f0wnliybb6xfxb0pb1lrucxotes2gnap6xjptpwzxxh2vfnvfrm3u0puzqlmsux69t4owpqseetwx5kbbcju7p%2blppyyoqkgggc9ccq4o19eux03hl5uc0olvzwtnjpyrlo7q6v1papsyhtkabbvwnucidl2dhcgm9ul1njjv%2fshhd6vj9bfewauhisdu9tsp5jr5bkd0xex3stxhbotz%2fidz7a777lfckvxkajlprb6ujl4c%2bpmqsa%3d%3d week 3 three key questions fr. michael himes download "three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) week 4 merulo center for career development https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5 my conversation with mary cannon, done in south dining hall :) week 6 mindfulness menu https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view week 7 tattoos on the heart fr. greg boyle integration 3 zuzanna kawula moreau integration 3 march 4, 2022 a melodious soul of the party zuzanna was a singer and her life was a musical, ironically as she really disliked musicalsshe thought of them as annoying and ineffectual scenes that brought little to the plot of the story, thus she always made me skip over the songs. and yet, the best way to describe her is through them. she loved music always listening to music and romanticizing her life to the fullest and although she hated drama she was a dramatic person whose life took her through many twists and turns. you often found her dancing in the kitchen to rock n’ roll, making up jazz combos on the piano, or writing heavily procrastinated essays whilst listening to the mario kart theme song playing in the background something she claimed made her fingers move faster on the keyboard. music made her happy and knowing that she implemented it into everything that she did. she loved playing the piano for others seeing their faces lighten up and relax with the melodies that she skillfully made up. she loved singing for the lord at church either singing psalms or harmonizing with the choir. melodies were her escape, in them, she found the necessity to slow down and take a step back in her daily routine and take a deep breath to take some time to reflect on the day’s happenings, her state of being, actions, and future pursuits. oftentimes we find ourselves in such a zone that we cannot get out of where we constantly are distracted, iyer points out that “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives'' (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). however, for https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ zuzanna, she found her inner peace in music to which she made sure to dedicate time for each and every day. although music wasn’t her career choice, she made sure to stick with it wherever life and her ever-ranging interests took her. she tried her best to make the best of every situation and kept motivated to keep up and be true to her pursuits having these words intentionally in our minds keeps us motivated to keep up and be true to our pursuits, living in the moment as when is a better time than now, and also being grateful for what we were able to experience and accomplish thus far. although living in the moment was a hard concept for her to grasp, as how can you do so when so many dwell in regrets and others solely focus on the future, she tried her hardest to be present with everyone around her and in all her experiences. she found this essential to finding herself and practicing gratitude everyday, similarly to sister theresa aletheia who brought about the concept of thinking of your own death “as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die'' by ruth graham moreau fye week three). whilst music was her rock, which made her who she was, she was passionate and intrigued many many other subjects and topics. she challenged herself to be open to new interests and tried many things out to try and find the ultimate thing that she wanted to pursue. however, she ultimately realized that not one single thing would be the “ultimate” career choice or path that was destined for her. she realized that “career decision-making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center moreau fye week four). letting life take her in whichever way, she decided on becoming a pediatrician combining her passion for understanding the intricate mechanisms of the human body and her love for interacting with children, after a long and hard decision process. whilst to her this decision came about surprisingly out of the blue, no one was surprised. her mother stated that her desire ever since https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ she was little was to work with children; she admired her kindergarten teacher, ms. simons, saying that when she grew up she totally wanted to be just like her. as they talked further she realized that she could potentially incorporate her passion for helping out kids with her fascination with the human body through becoming a doctor her way of serving the community (“reflection moreau week 5” by zuzanna kawula moreau fye week 5). although this was her career, she made sure to stick with music and all her other numerous hobbies dreaming of one day owning a piano shop of her own on the side. although she found the path in becoming a pediatrician much harder than she initially assumed and found it challenging to not give up like others were telling her to do, just like father hesburgh who once said “i know why i was fired. if i were in nixon’s shoes i probably might have done the same. but i took a stand for something, and i wasn’t about to stop” (“hesburgh '' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two), she persisted through and stood her ground for her passion in medicine. even when there were easier paths to take that people were proposing for her to do, she got through the obstacles that came her way. she found herself in the work that she did, and found joy to aid and relieve children in their health troubles. in times of hardships, annoyances with her job and relationships, she often reflected on her day-to-day experiences in her small, royal blue journal, which she utilized to look back and be thankful for the good that she was able to serve others. she found this introspection especially good for her own mental health and self-awareness, as tasha eurich comments “ after all, what better way is there to increase our self-knowledge than to look inward, to delve deeply into our experiences and emotions, and to understand why we are the way we are?” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). zuzanna https://docs.google.com/document/d/1smy67_3m6fbq4anrx8vlicbkosuo-kess9mxjalazco/edit?usp=sharing https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ had a melodious soul that tried to express happiness and genuine energy even if she was not feeling her best. she worked hard to give everyone the undivided attention that they deserved her goal being to make whoever she talked to feel like they were so special and the only one in the room. she enjoyed forming melodious harmonies in relationships with others and cherished meaningful experiences that she shared with them. she often came to pope francis’ quote “i could have very well ended up among today's "discarded" people. and that's why i always ask myself, deep in my heart: "why them and not me?" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven). she believed that with every interaction that she had with another person, her soul lightened a bit more each time. thus, she tried to treasure meaningful interactions to aid her in becoming a better self that would be able to live a fulfilling life. she deeply acknowledged the fact that not one person was a single being that thrives on their own, but rather our own beings thrive on the existence of others and our interactions with them. she was a soul full of cheer and drama. she loved deeply and sang loudly. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau 4/29/2022 moreau mission method: will’s well lived life i believe that the key to a life well lived is surrounding yourself with loving, life-giving relationships. when i am supported and encouraged, i become the best version of myself and can help others live their lives well too. i believe that the ability to truly listen is the most important asset i can have. when i listen to others, i can better understand their viewpoint and learn from them. i believe that success is based on the impact i have had on others. i can find success even in the smallest of interaction, if the other person i interacted with walks away better than he/she was before. i believe that i should never stop improving, learning, or growing. the age old saying “you learn something new every day” holds a lot of truth. i believe that fun and laughter should take place in my life everyday. work and seriousness are extremely important but if i don’t slow down to enjoy life every once in a while i am going to miss it. finally, i believe that if i follow the beliefs above and practice them daily at the end of each day i will be able to look back and say that i am the person i want to be. my mission starts with who i surround myself with. i thought back to earlier in the year when we read father greg boyle’s book and listened to him speak in class. he not only is a great role model but also imparted the importance of surrounding yourself with people of diverse perspectives that will make us more well rounded better people, specifically his story about the prisoners sharing the meal; “alone they didn’t have much but together they had a potful of plenty” (week 7). my mission statement embodies this lesson of sharing our gifts with others. as father hesburgh wisely says; “we do not prove something by tearing it down. we prove something by building it up” (week 2). i believe that my mission statement when followed correctly sets me on the right path to live a fulfilling life surrounded by loving relationships with friends and family. listening is a large part of building up others as well as improving ourselves.“because mainstream sources — schools, textbooks, media — don’t provide us with the multiple perspectives we need” (week 10). as we read in week nine we can learn from everyone even the places we least expect it “they accompanied me – especially the kids – as they taught me spanish, and as they helped me understand the complexities of their lives and the possibilities for finding some paths forward, which we began to work on together” (week 9). the missionary learned from the children even though he was the one there to teach and help them. this is because he was forced to listen and learn from them due to his illness. he found that the children were not much different than him; “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love” (week 12). we can learn alot from others, especially those who have been on this earth longer than us because they have lived through many of the adversities we face and can offer advice. this is another great reminder that we never know it all and there is always room for improvement, just like my mission statement says. our lives are not defined by our jobs or career or how smart we are, i remember from one of the career discernment discussions we heard; “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you” (week 4) and “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often” (week 1). i believe that work is important but it is equally if not more important to stop and enjoy the life we have been given every so often. “joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to extend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before'' (week 3). fun has its place in each of our lives and can bring meaning and purpose to it. it also can be great motivation that can improve our work lives and our relationships with others. finally, i believe in standing by our mission statements. however, that does not mean shoving them down other people's throats. “in sports fandom and in the kind of shallow way that people engage in partisan fandom, that second step is never made. there’s never a goal to convince a yankee fan to come to the red sox” (week 11). i really enjoy this sports metaphor and think it is a great reminder to be respectful to others' opinions even if we disagree with them. we can not grow ourselves nor help others on their path to live a life well lived if we shut out and belittle their ideas and opinions. overall, i believe that reading and practicing this mission statement each and every day will help me pursue my life well lived here at notre dame and beyond. works cited “https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ ” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1 father hesburg in the movie hesburgh moreau fye week two three key questions (adapted from fr. michael himes) moreau fye week three “https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/” moreau fye week four “https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/” by tasha eurich moreau week six https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817/download?download_frd=1 = by greg boyle moreau fye week seven https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week ten https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ by eitan hersh moreau fys week 11 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ by dean marcus cole moreau fys week 12 kyle, integration one moreau fye professor taylor 15 october 2021 word count: 1321 “i believe that i will succeed” a clash of golden helmets. a sea of green and navy. the cheers and chants of my family, classmates, teachers, and almost anyone you asked. these are my earliest memories of notre dame; to me it was little more than a football team, connected to those in my hometown because we share the state of indiana, and a faith in the catholic church. but now, after years of notre dame being in the back of my mind, as i was exposed to new people and ideas, had my faith tested, and matured into a young adult, notre dame is now my home. while i likely cannot say why i choose notre dame, besides the obvious answers of wanting to be successful and be with like minded individuals. to me, choosing to come to this wonderful university was me choosing to open myself to new people and new opportunities, it was me choosing to confront and fully connect with my faith, and it was me choosing to join a community of very different people now in the same boat. this new experience, a life at notre dame, has truly pushed me to consider what i believe. i believe that i am looking for long lasting connections and relationships here at notre dame when i decided to come to notre dame, i had to make the conscious decision to go to a different school than all of my friends. growing up, i have always been shy and more on the quiet side, which at times has made it difficult to branch out and connect with others. when coming to notre dame, i was prepared to change that, i was ready to force myself into the uncomfortable and put myself out there, trying to make friends. with the key idea in mind that everyone has similar struggles in this way, worded wonderfully by dr. brown, “when you ask people about love, they tell you about heartbreak; when you ask people about belonging, they’ll tell you about their most excruciating experiences of being excluded; and when you ask people about connections, the stories they told me were about disconnection,” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) which highlights that everyone experiences the same fears of rejection, i can force myself to just except that this is the way things are and push myself out there. i’ve gone to parties (which i had never done before), i’ve stayed up, and most importantly i’ve made new friends. specifically, despite it being only two months so far, i have made a friend that i already consider to be one of my closest friends. my section mate collin, who i have spent night after night hanging out until early morning talking to each other about anything and everything, he is someone that i feel i can rely on, and i feel good knowing i can do the same for him. “a good, healthy friendship is one where two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people,” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by red flag campaign moreau fye week 4), this puts into words what it means to be a good friendship, and our mutual helping of each other through our problems makes me confident this is a healthy friendship, which makes me happy knowing i’m already completing the goals i set out to do. i believe that i can grow at notre dame as a person by balancing fun with my studies and development of faith. arriving on campus, i was ready to engage in the academic community and dive head first into my advanced education. but one thing that i truly was not ready for was how strongly i was confronted by faith. not necessarily being forced into anything accept for a beautiful opening meeting at the grotto, just the general presence of chapels in every dorm, the basilica in view from my dorm, priests going by on the sidewalks on the day to day, i have found myself considering my own faith more and more. i have realized that despite challenges i have faced in regards to religion, going to a very secular public school where kids could even be heard criticizing religion, these challenges do not stop me from connecting with faith. in fact, as fr. fagerberg said, “and yet even tribulations can advance us toward the kingdom of god.” (father fagerberg moreau fye week three). keeping in mind that i can still approach religion despite past disconnect from my faith, and be welcomed with open arms by god, gives me an astounding reassurance. in addition to developing my faith and friendships, i have also jumped straight into school work, and have taken to putting every ounce of myself into my studies. i have found that the best way to succeed and to truly learn is to get deep in the topics and truly try to understand what i am learning. but i do this with david brooks’ tedtalk in mind, in which he says, “the problem is this turns you into a shrewd animal, who treats life as a game, and you become a cold, calculated creature who slips into a sort of mediocrity where you realize there’s a difference between your desired self and your actual self.” (david brooks moreau fye week 2). and considering how i do not want to become an unfriendly person too ingrained to appreciate life, it gives me a greater appreciation for the time i am spending with my new friends, and my time approaching faith, to make me a holistically balanced person. i believe that my community here at notre dame should embrace our differences and move on to conquer this stage in our life together. these most recent weeks have been an amazing opportunity of meeting so many new people from so many different backgrounds. especially in week six, when we were able to listen to all of the “where i’m from” poems, and i could hear about the diverse places people are coming from, and the diverse experiences that everyone has had. i understand that it is critical to understand the perspectives and stories of others, to appreciate and embrace our differences, and as stated in scientific american, “it isn’t nice to think we aren’t very nice,” (scientific american moreau fye week 7). this quotation is so important to me because it encompasses the ideas behind the social injustices of the world today, that people view problems in a us versus them mentality. to move past this and towards an inclusive future, i believe that it starts here at notre dame. even carla harris spoke on this at the commencement speech, saying, “i rejoice that we have all found a new common ground in that we have all truly had a shared experience,” (“commencement speech” by carla harris moreau fye week 5). despite so many people having such different stories, we are all now in the same boat, all of our journeys have brought us to notre dame. with this new connection i hope that the notre dame community will remain united and move forwards together. upon stepping foot at the university of notre dame, i was confronted with new opportunities, possibilities to expand my knowledge about a plethora of things, possibilities to go out, have fun, and make long lasting friendships, the possibilities to expand my faith while surrounded by all of these religious structures and symbols, and the possibilities to connect with people dissimilar to me. all of these possibilities make my time here at notre dame valuable beyond measure, i truly believe that being here at notre dame is the perfect next step in my life. looking forward to my hopes and dreams, of becoming a surgeon and having a family, the relationships and knowledge that i gain will help me along further than anything else could. at notre dame, i believe that i will succeed. integration #4 professor chan spring integration my mission statement the fight for freedom is not free. i believe freedom is not having the ability to do what you want, but the ability to do the right thing. this is something that is rare in our society today. my goal is to fight for the freedom of not only those in our nation, but everyone. i believe that everyone has the right to be freeto act and think as they should and can. i want to “use (my) degrees and education to make an impact in the world and in people’s lives.” (notre dame domer dozen, notre dame, moreau fye week two). several groups around the world are constantly oppressedtheir rights stripped from them. however, our world has been so numb to other people’s problems. we have become so self-centered. we have forgotten that we are not the only people that suffer. humanity has turned suffering into an excuse to be able to dismiss other’s pain and bring all the attention onto our own. i want to remind the world of the real reasons behind sufferingredemption and growth. without failure, suffering, pain, disappointment, and mistakes, we can never grow. i think one of the biggest things that need to change in order to promote the freedom of all is our perspective. “when i asked what she thinks the world should value, she answered ‘honesty, loyalty, selflessness, etc’. i realized then that these values in individual people are much more important than worldly values.” (conversation activity with my mom, moreau week five). for others to experience love, affection, and care is one of my hopes for the future. loyalty is one of the rarest characteristics in the world today, but i aim to change that. i strive to be loyal to my closest family, loved ones, friends, and myself. i want to be someone confident in https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ themselves, in my ability to achieve the change that i am working towards. in order to do this, i know that i must cultivate hope and an excitement for the futurean openness and an optimism. “like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail.” (constitutions of the congregation of holy cross, by the congregation of holy cross, week 12, moreau fye). i want to cultivate my compassion, empathy, and sympathy. i think that people are so harsh to each other because they are harsh on themselves. i want to change this and be kind to myself before anyone else so that i can give love to others once i know what it is to receive and accept love. to accept love from myself, my family, my friends, but most importantly, from god himself. “....to begin thanking god and being more positive about the things that we had already, to be able to do things more gladly.” (5 minutes, grotto network, moreau fye week 6). one of the reasons why i joined army rotc was to be able to make a definitive change in our nation’s purpose to pursue freedom. i feel that i am able to relate to others that have the same mission, the same ‘why’to fight for each other’s freedom. i believe surrounding yourself with like-minded minds is a way to continue to live our one’s mission. although we may have the same ‘why’, we definitely do not have the same ‘how’. we are each different in the ways that we lead, follow, fail, and grow. this year in rotc, i learned that nothing is “... a one-step process.” (navigating your career journey, meruelo center for career development, moreau fye week four). everything takes time, patience, and persistence. however, it is also important to surround yourself with those that have a different mission and various ‘hows’. “there seems to be a lot of talk about isolating ourselves into ideological values. the worry seems to be in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ losing the sense of how someone might reasonably disagree with us.” (how to avoid an echo chamber, by thinknd, moreau fye week 11). there is growth to be had by being with those that you do not agree with, or differ from in ideology. this is a significance place of growth that the world lackshow to talk and treat people that disagree with you. another thing that i have learned while being part of the batatillion is that, as leaders, we are also followers. there are times where i don’t know what to do, but the people that i am leading have ideas on how to complete the mission or have had experience with this specific problem. because of this, i also learned that “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well.” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together , steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). even when we think that we are in charge, we are all in this togetherwe are each vital to the success of a mission. one way that i have learned to recenter myself is to reflect on everything that has been challenging me lately and how i’ve dealt with iteither good or bad. i also fight the internal battle of believing that “..if i take time off, i’ll be that much more hurried the rest of the time.” (why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer, moreau fye week one). this is not true. this reflection is “... a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die, ruth grahm, moreau fye week three). through these reflections, i am able to notice things that i would not have if i didn’t take time to reflect. i am able to realize what consistently bothers me and how i react to things that trouble me. i am also able to recognize that i do have a purpose in lifei have a goal that i am aiming towards. this is especially helpful when i feel extremely unmotivated or that everything https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146064 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html that i am doing is useless, that i am going nowhere. through these reflections and my conversations with my closest friends and family that “.. i could not convince myself that god loved me. “you can ask him to show you, though. and you can pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved.”’ (growing up gay and catholic, jacob walsh, moreau fye week 10). through my conversations with my friends, and my faith, i am able to continue to pursue my goal of freedomfor everyone to be able to pursue the good. “our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love. we’ve wandered into god’s own ‘jurisdiction’.” (tattoos on the heart, fr. greg boyle, s.j., moreau fye week 7). https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007/download?download_frd=1 mark van kirk prof. vanessa chan moreau fye 4 march 2022 an obedient creature mark van kirk was a friend to those who knew him. he might not have always said it, but it was clear that he cared. he made a conscious effort to keep calm, to think about his actions, to consider the needs of others. but he was also easily distracted during conversation— easily pulled away from menial dialogue to consider ideas that were important to him. if mark were here, he would want everyone to know that he regrets not listening more to other people. he certainly tuned in when something was interesting to him, but that does not take much effort in the first place; in fact, it is natural to do so. “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes—which means we’re never caught up with our lives” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). mark was especially prone to such interruptions, but it should be noted that many of these interruptions were callings that he felt an obligation to respond to—fixing a scooter for a friend, walking someone back to their dorm, or explaining theology to a roommate. one thing that anyone could learn from mark is beauty. he enjoyed artwork, and he loved creating and building things that displayed beautiful ideas. mark especially appreciated the niched statuettes around notre dame that are easily ignored. fittingly, his dorm, dillon hall, contains five—nearly 20%—of the statuettes around campus: those of st. patrick, st. jerome, st. augustine, st. john henry newman, and commodore barry. he admired the saints’ dedication https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ towards what they did out of their sincere love. fr. ted hesburgh gave advice to one notre dame student that reiterates this idea: “serve our country, put your country before party and politics, and always do the right thing” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). whatever one’s vocation, he must not forget to attend to the most important philosophy—that of love. as a child, mark knew to love yet struggled to do it. that is something that most of us have experienced as well. but in his struggle, mark learned to transform the pain into something beneficial. rather than forgetting his faults, mark brought them to the forefront of his mind with the intention of never committing them again. likewise, he remembered the good things that were brought to fruition, hoping in earnest that he would be able to share those things with others. in this way, mark learned that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by nd undergraduate career services – moreau fye week four). with the weight of sin as a constant burden, death is something that mark frequently pondered. it is not usually brought up, but it is something to consider. so often people “try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because [they] think that’s where [they’ll] find happiness. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that [they] find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). it is counter-intuitive, but with death in the back of one’s mind, small things that often make us upset become extraordinarily insignificant. instead, eternal characteristics are brought to light—characteristics that mark tried to live by. in college, mark become more concerned about his future. so much of his life had been directed towards college by his parents and teachers, so when he finally got there, it seemed as if https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html he had gotten to the end already. but in light of the stress, mark found consolation in these words: “i have my mission—i never may know it in this life, but i shall be told it in the next” (class slideshow by vanessa chan – moreau fye week five). it is natural to worry about the future and the responsibilities that will arise as time goes on, but it will all be taken care of. rather than asking why when problems arise, one should ask what. for “why questions trap us in our past, [whereas] what questions help us create a better future” (“five minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). regardless of one’s abilities, appearances, faults, or failures, one must have hope. “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn’t lock itself in darkness, that doesn’t dwell on the past, that doesn’t simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). mark was especially hopeful in his life, and we must now hope with him that the lord will take mark into his loving arms. mark’s death may not be the death of a hero, but it was the death of a man who strove to fulfill god’s will. when the time comes for each of us to pass on to the next world, we can remember those who came before us—men like st. thomas aquinas, george washington, fr. ted hesburgh, and even mark van kirk—so that we can follow their limited yet insightful examples that testify to the light. in a world that has great darkness, the light becomes increasingly necessary until the time comes for christ to establish perfect relationships. one way to make this light more visible is to let your light shine on others. be a mirror to reflect it. be the spectator to admire it. be the bearer that carries it. if mark were with us today, he would make known to us the sheer beauty of each of our souls. we must lift up one another so that we might not fall down in the weight of this world. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/678593?module_item_id=188845 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau fye integration 3 professor retartha 3/4/2022 a few words about a joyous life if the people gathered here today are hearing these words, then i guess my time to leave this earth has recently come. while death itself is a sad event, try to not spend today mourning the loss of someone close to you. instead, celebrate the time we did spend together because those are where the memories that matter were made. looking back on my life, i realized that the older i got, the happier i got with my life. i believe that this comes from me applying the lessons i learned throughout my life, in order to try to live a better life. in life, happiness will come and go. joy, on the other hand, “is much deeper and much more central” than happiness (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). joy is derived from living a life that you are internally, genuinely happy with. in this eulogy, i will be sharing with you my process to living my best life, and hope that you will be able to take something from these words to help bring joy to your own lives. throughout my many years, i heard people say that they were “never caught up with their lives” ( “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this is a common reality in today's world, which is sad because it is in contradiction with what a life well lived is. one should not feel like life is a constant drag or struggle. it shouldn’t feel like a to-do list that is never ending. something that contributes to making life feel overwhelming is getting caught up in distractions. we live in a world where the great technology we have makes it extremely difficult to avoid distractions. how many times a day does your phone buzz? texts, calls, or even just a notification from your favorite game can all cause distractions that take away https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/15864 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/15864 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144347 hours of the day. learning to filter out distractions and focus on what really matters is an important first step to living a life well-lived. the next step is finding out what really matters to you. in order to do this, it is important to take time for self-reflection. be careful during the reflection process through, because one “can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than [they] started” with if the self-reflection is done without a purpose ( “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i found it helpful to ask myself six guiding questions. first, was there anything that happened today that i was unhappy with? second, why was i unhappy with said occurrence? third, is there anything i could have done to change said occurrence? these three questions will guide you during self-reflection, allowing you to identify what bothers you, why it bothers you, and a possible solution. the next three questions are similar. was there anything that happened today that brought me joy? why do i think that occurrence brought me joy? is there anything i can do to bring about said situation/occurrence more often? these last three questions guide one you during self-reflection too, allowing you to identify what brings you joy. it can also help to receive feedback from those closest to you. speaking with someone in your life about your strengths, weaknesses, past experiences, and desired future can give valuable insight on what to do and/or work on in order to make your life as joyous as possible. personally, i had one of these conversations with a previous volleyball coach during my second semester of freshman year of college. he told me that something that he believed was going to bring me success and joy was that “i had become unapologetically me” (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5). since that conversation i have kept that statement in mind. i got to a point at the end of high school where i was comfortable/confident with who i was, and i wasn’t going to change that for people. it https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1fefdr-ir3d8en2tzfbiu1xn2q2ve8lb5vocaq9owx7q/edit played a large role in my life, especially going to college and at my first place of employment post college. once you have identified what brings joy and hinders joy in your life, the next step i followed to live a life well lived was focusing on the things that brought me joy, then putting most of my efforts into those things. for me, the three things that brought me the most joy were the close relationships i had, the hobbies i loved, and trying/experiencing new things. starting with hobbies, i believe that finding a way to participate in what you love is a great source of joy for many. each year, notre dame chooses a dozen where they honor 12 alumni under 32 for their excellence in faith, service, learning or work. one of the dozen for 2021 wrote about how he grew up loving the sport of rowing, so when he went to work at cornell, he co-established the cornell rowing club, where he remains a coach to this day” (domer dozen by dr. austin hickman moreau fye week 2). while i have no interest in rowing, and don’t know the person personally, i admired and valued the idea of finding a way to continue with hobbies that bring you joy as you grow up. second, pushing myself outside of my comfort zone to try new things is something that i believe is crucial to personal growth and joy in life. the reason for this is that the “only way to know more about yourself is to test [new] waters”. you have to “just get out and experience life” to find new things that you enjoy ( “navigating your career journey'' by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). whether it be something as small as trying new things or something as big as traveling the world by yourself, pushing your comfort zone a few times a week is a great way to grow as a person and possibly find joy. third, and most important to me, most of the joy in my life was derived from the close relationships i had. people interact with other people hundreds of times a day. those interactions https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ build relationships, and are much needed to live a healthy life. people's lives “flow through [their] relationships with others'' (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). just like people's lives flow through their relationships with others, peoples joy spawns from and flows between close relationships with others. the friends and family that i made throughout my years gave me all the support, humor, and love i needed to build a healthy life filled with joy. to conclude this eulogy, i would like to leave everyone with one thing. happiness will come and go, just like sadness, anger, worry, and all other emotions. joy however, is something deeper. it is an internal peace and happiness with how you live your life. strive to find joy in your lives, and in turn you will build yourself a life well lived. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration three before beginning the actual assignment, i would like you to know that this was a bit of a difficult prompt for me to respond to due to some personal circumstances, so i apologize in advance if it lacks the depth or feeling that this assignment is meant to take on. secondly, i am writing this eulogy from the perspective of someone many years from now. please know that i am not asserting that i possess all the characteristics that are discussed. rather, these characteristics are ones discussed in this semester’s moreau that i hope to eventually possess and make a positive impact on others with. in no way do i want to sound like i am praising myself. this is the way that i want to be remembered—not the way that i would remembered currently if i were to die tomorrow. the fulfillment of a well-lived life what is a life well-lived? this is a question that could take on a multitude of responses. there is no right or wrong answer necessarily, but there are certainly answers to this question that different people would disagree with. despite the number of varying responses to this question, i am confident that nobody would disagree that grace displayed a well-lived life. she touched those around her and made an impression on so many in varying ways. one of her outstanding attributes was her ability to take a step back from the mundane daily tasks that cloud our brains from seeing the bigger picture. no matter how busy she got, she always took the time to calm down and keep everything in perspective. one big distraction factor in life is technology, but she kept technology at a distance in order to remember who she was (“why we need to slow down our lives” pico iyer). grace was an avid yoga practitioner and meditated regularly which kept her calm and collected when life got rough and complicated. another huge part of grace’s life and what shaped her into the person she was was her experience at the university of notre dame. she grew up a huge fan and ended up attending college there. the mission of the university is what truly drew her to the school, and she loved everything that it stood for. when she was just 9, she got the privilege to meet father hesburgh, which she did not understand the significance and importance of until later. later on, she found out all that he did in his life which was so remarkable and way ahead of the times that he was living in. he was not concerned with the social stigma around certain things, rather he formed opinions and made decisions based on fairness and human dignity regardless of the social climate of the time (hesburgh documentary). this is a characteristic that grace put into practice in her own life. she included everyone and did all she could to take action against things that were unfair and unjust. as we all sit here at grace’s funeral, she would not want us to all be sad. she implemented sister alethia’s outlook on death into her own mindset. “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen—both excruciatingly difficult and breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” ruth graham). grace did not fear death. she ignored death for so long in her younger years because it scared her. she lost many close relatives at a young age, and it was the cause of all of the worst pain in her life. while many of us here might have this same outlook, grace would encourage us to not look at it in this way. she did not deny the pain that comes along with death, but she changed her perspective to look at the joyous and beautiful aspects of death. i am certain that she would encourage all of us not to ignore the happy portion of her passing. grace was someone who was successful and happy in her career. from a young age she was ambitious and went for what she wanted. she did not let any obstacles stand in her way, even when the odds were stacked completely against her. because of this she became extremely successful and knew how to push to achieve what she wanted to. she worked for the same place for a long time and persevered to work her way all the way to the top. she was not discouraged nor dreaded a lot of work. she was a go-getter and continually had goals she was reaching for. i remember when grace was in college, she called me to ask me questions about herself for a school assignment. i answered the questions with no hesitation. i did not think much of my answers simply because i didn’t have to; she displayed these characteristics so blatantly that it was fully unnecessary to even have to try to contemplate my responses. she asked me questions akin to, “what do i value most in life, or when do i succeed and thrive the most in life?” i distinctly remember her being a little taken aback by my answers almost as if she did not realize these things about herself or she did not believe me. this speaks to her humbleness and intentions in life. she did not possess all of the great qualities in search of accolades from those around her. she genuinely lived her life this way with nothing expected in return, and in turn, she impacted countless amounts of people. in an interview with pope francis (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis), he highlights the importance of human connection and the dangers of living in isolation. he discusses the immense amount of people living in the margins of society and how we need to work to all become one. grace was somebody who tremendously values love and inclusion of all in her life. it did not matter who it was, she made everyone feel special, loved, and wanted. she made those who feel worthless feel important, and she was always there to support and congratulate anyone in any endeavor they undertook. giorgi kharchilava professor wagner moreau fye capstone integration after writing my own eulogy, the moreau powers-at-be have blessed me with a more pleasant prompt. instead of facing death or mortality, i get to ponder how to best live my life. it’s not an easy question; one might argue that there are many small steps and adjustments one could make to live a life-well lived. however, it’s worth trying to condense every little tip, trick, and maxim on how to live life into a small set of well-articulated principles. these principles would have to involve not only success, but the secrets to fulfillment, self-actualization, and becoming a contributive member of the global community. so, here is the attempt. it has been a difficult semester. i’ve taken on more responsibilities but become less responsible, tried to learn but feel like i’m not learning enough, tried to be a good friend and person but come up short too many times. i have all the tools to solve this problem. diligence, study, and appreciation of what i have would be enough. indeed, it is things like this that can help me lead a life well-lived in general. it comes down to two things. firstly, i must learn and understand the true meaning of prioritizing myself. second, and most importantly, i must actively appreciate those around me both in word and deed, i can better achieve a life well-lived. so, a personal mission statement of mine might look something like this: is a freshman physics student at the university of notre dame. his goals consist of engagin in proper self-care and appreciating those around him both with his words and deeds a life well-lived starts with a mind well-rested. in the modern age, however, this is no easy task, especially considering the effects of technology. psychologist pico iyer puts it aptly: “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (moreau fye week 1, “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer) in an era such as this, to effectively prioritize oneself, one must think and form a relationship with technology. suggestions range from taking a “technology sabbath” every week to modern “do not disturb” settings. essentially, we need to confront our problems with technology: how too much information is sometimes a bad thing, how we can’t trust it all, and how it overwhelms us. indeed, this frees up time and allows for a fuller life. one of the fullest lives ever lived by a notre dame affiliate was that of theodore hesburgh, president of notre dame from 1952 to 1987. as a holy cross priest and president of a premier catholic university, hesburgh made every decision under the watchful eye of outside religious and political authorities. however, this did not deter him from sticking with what he thought was right. when president nixon pressured hesburgh into not releasing a report on civil rights during an election year, hesburgh released it anyway and chastised the executive branch for its lack of action on civil rights. he also skirted common catholic practice when he allowed women to attend the university (moreau fye week 2, hesburgh). of course, hesburgh’s decisions didn’t always age gracefully, but he stuck with what was right and listened to the cries of justice, even when he didn’t really have to. this ties both into self-prioritization and appreciation of others viewpoints. of course, faith has been an interesting part of my notre dame journey. i have joined the folk choir in an attempt to get to know the lord and his word better. the great st. augustin once said, “a human being is one whose heart is restless until it rests in god.” (moreau fye, “three key questions” adapted from michael hines) the journey to faith is not easy, but it is a certainly beautiful way of self-prioritization by prudence and sacrifice. again, this is very much a good intersection between the two parts of my mission statement: self-improvement and appreciation of another view, a holy view. self-prioritization often is a key step in liberating oneself from stress. i consider myself a somewhat altruistic and sociable person, so naturally i struggle telling people no, whether it be for homework help or just to spend time together. oftentimes, it’s best i focus on my priorities as an academic or even set boundaries of personal space. as i reflected with my roommate, concerns like this came to light (moreau fye week 5). he told me about how he cherished our relationship but that i had stopped working so hard for the luxury of seeing many people and pleasing many people. it made me realize that to truly love myself i can’t simply do social things; i must improve myself before hoping to improve the lives of others. in all this talk of self-prioritization, one maxim remains important: self-prioritization isn’t just empty introspection. to truly prioritize oneself when engaging in self-analysis, care and caution are required. psychologist tasha eurich explains the modern phenomenon perfectly: “the problem with introspection isn’t that it’s categorically ineffective, but that we don’t always do it right. when we examine the causes of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors — which we often do by asking ourselves why?questions — we tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers.” (moreau fye week 7, “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich) i need to realize that simply moving to self-prioritize is not enough; i need to do it correctly. i can’t look for the mental “easy way out” when solving personal problems. it is much better to ask what to do to solve problems than why they exist and rush to easy solutions. so, i’ve hypothetically done it. i’ve cleared out technology’s control on my life by regimented discipline, i listen to the thoughts in my head and think what to do to solve them, and i focus on my interests a healthy amount without fixation on being sociable. now it’s time to appreciate and engage with the problems of our worldwide community. before starting, one must understand the principle of accompaniment. accompaniment involves not helping someone from high above, but taking a journey of strife with them and, in doing so, both parties gain something wonderful. steve reifenburg, a man who has completed humanitarian works in south africa, puts it this way: “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well. for all my mistakes, something worked well in our time together.” (moreay fye week 9, “teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenburg) one of the biggest parts about accompaniment is a listening ear, which ties really well into the appreciation of others. one of the most fascinating yet damaging examples of this is modern america’s strife with racism. in all fairness, there is no question that america has drastically improved the state of its race relations since our union’s birth. however, problems remain, and it is too often a white fallacy to think that past problems don’t have after effects today. a seeming portrayal that racial problems are mostly “solved” leads to white backlash, which dr. robin d’angelo explains as such: “not often encountering these challenges, we withdraw, defend, cry, argue, minimize, ignore, and in other ways push back to regain our racial position and equilibrium. i term that push back white fragility.” (moreau fye week 10, “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo). much like modern americans, each human suffers from decreasing their mental flexibility towards other peoples’ problems. to fight this, we need to be engaged in listening at what others have to say. this forms the first step of accompaniment. one of the greatest barriers to listening in the modern technological world is the echo chamber. echo chambers are accelerating political polarization, and thus are a reflection of our collective failure at leading well-lived lives. dr. paul blacshko of thinknd defines the echo chamber as: “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited.” (moreau fye week 11, “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko) avoiding echo chambers, and thus helping appreciate each others’ viewpoints, is accomplished with similar principles to eliminating technology: understanding the difference of information in the modern era. the internet is a bottomless pit filled with clans of like-minded individuals that are just one mouse click away: of course people will start to confirm their own beliefs and see less valid the stances of others. the tension of echo chambers and white fragility reached its peak in the summer of 2020 following the murder of george floyd. the university of notre dame’s own dean of the law school marcus j. cole wrote a moving piece on how combat the pain, division, and racism. he explains: “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it.” (moreau fye week 12, ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.’ by dean marcus j cole). so, it is clear, not only must we listen to each other’s problems, but we need to not separate ourselves. we need to all join as one to advance our collective accompaniment. indeed, proximity is how we can best accompany, appreciate and solve our problems. developing a mission is a tough thing, especially at my young age. i know my vision: to be a physicist or scientist who contributes to my field of study. but, as a human, how to pursue a life well-lived is an amorphous question. certain institutions like notre dame have it easily built into their mission statement: “a catholic university draws its basic inspiration from jesus christ as the source of wisdom and from the conviction that in him all things can be brought to their completion.” (moreau fye week 13, university of notre dame mission statement) i am not a catholic institution, but a human being. i have trouble finding an exact path to a life well-lived, whether that problem comes from a lack of knowledge or a lack of restraint. however, in my mission, i can confidently outline two pillars of an effective existence: effective, healthy, self-prioritization and a will to listen and engage others’ problems. my time here at notre dame, my time here in this world my time here at notre dame, my time here in this world college is a very dynamic environment. to rip a page out of tolkien’s book, “i’m not the same hobbit i once was.” i came to college unsure of what to expect. however, after spending a year here at notre dame, i can honestly tell myself in the mirror that my values, personality, and outlook on life has shifted for the better. moreau has helped guide and shape my character this year. i believe that every student is an integral part of notre dame. therefore, by learning about notre dame and her values in moreau, we are learning about ourselves. through my moreau education discussing vulnerability, personal goals, and character, i have enhanced my understanding of who i am and who i want to become. with that in mind, i have revised my original mission statement to more closely reflect what i have learned this year. my mission statement is as follows: i am dedicated to imposing a positive impact on the lives of others through the intersection of my talents and passions, coupled with my education. my catholic identity enables me to gather and share virtues and love with others. and, through this love, i strive to form long lasting, beneficial relationships. my accomplishments, achievements, and dedication towards success and a life of happiness, will inspire others to achieve great things. and, as i allow myself to be my most unforgettable and authentic self, i will inspire others to follow suit, so that they might find the truest expression of themselves. a life well-lived closely resembles a life lived for others. my time at notre dame has taught me that when one of us succeeds on the shoulders of others, we all succeed. i plan on carrying that mindset with me as i navigate my career, relationships, and involvements in life. any act of service towards others will always deepen interpersonal relationships, which will expand my overall capacity to love and be loved. i’ve never been someone motivated by success. rather, i see myself as motivated by achieving what i once considered to be beyond my own horizon. the beautiful thing about horizons is you can see the limit of where you came from, and where you have yet to go. i dedicate myself to reaching every goal i set for myself and not letting meaningless, short-lived appreciations of wealth or power shadow my otherwise keen objective of living a life well-lived. it is astounding that i have already completed a quarter of my notre dame academic experience. however, i plan to revisit this mission statement and grow my life plan as i see fit. over the next three years, my revisitation will allow me to measure my growth and aptitude for doing good in this world. i plan on using my mission statement as a tool to make the most out of my next three years. i’ve divided my integration into three sections that i think best reflect my growth throughout this course. how i will treat others at notre dame, i have been exposed to several different ways of life and identities. as a tour guide, i lead people around our beautiful campus, and while i could rattle off the statistics and figures they give me, i usually just rely on the campus and students to give the tour for me. it’s a big campus, but a small student body. it is beyond likely that i run into at least five people while giving a tour. whether it’s a classmate, dorm mate, or friend, i’ll introduce them to the tour group and ask them a question about notre dame. i think that this is the best way to show how notre dame encompasses a wide variety of people with different backgrounds and opinions. embracing humanity’s diversity is a key part of my mission statement, and i think developing stronger relationships with those different from me is going to be the way in which i grow those social muscles. as i said before, every student at notre dame deserves to be here, and notre dame would not be the same without each individual student. as pope francis said in his ted talk, “we are precious, each and every one of us. each and every one of us is irreplaceable in the eyes of god” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). therefore, every human being deserves to be treated with respect and dignity. i may disapprove of certain choices, or maybe i wouldn’t live my life the way someone else would, but that doesn’t mean that they are unwilling, and undeserving of my respect and appreciation. over the next three years i will strive to embrace every aspect of humanity however different from my own. last night i had the pleasure of inviting my grandma out to notre dame to watch yo-yo ma with me at the debartolo performing arts center. we sat in the middle of an auditorium and she asked me questions about notre dame. but when she asked me if i thought it was diverse, i didn’t quite know what to say. notre dame is, undoubtedly, a very white and catholic school. but her question got me thinking, does our diversity go deeper than skin, gender, or nationality? we most definitely have a diverse student body, and i plan on using my mission statement as a platform on which i can explore these communities. during my second philosophy class this semester, one of my classmates told me that once a week he does a “flinch”. he defined a “flinch” as something that pushes his comfort zone. whether it’s attending a lgbt event even if he isn’t part of that community himself, biking to michigan, or going to a random guys dorm, sitting in their lounge and making conversation, he wanted to push himself to meet new people and embrace others. i want to follow in his footsteps. there are a lot of aspects of humanity that i am vastly unfamiliar with. i want to engage with those who i may not normally interact with. i need to take this precious time i have in college to expand my horizons. one of my friends https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript recently came out. since he did, it is almost like he has been freed of fear. i think he was scared of how others at a catholic institution might perceive him, similar to jacob walsh in the grotto article we read in week 10 (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). however, i think it is easy for me as a straight white male to say that “diversity is more than skin deep” when there are serious racial and social issues facing minorities in this country and in our notre dame community. this semester i took my writing and rhetoric course as part of my core requirements. in the class, we spent the semester diving through the prison industrial complex and its intricacies. i realized that i need a more active role in allyship towards minorities. thinking back through the course, i think this most closely related to dean cole’s statement that “i cannot do this alone. each of us must do what we can, wherever we are” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12) this quote resembles a similar topic discussed during the first semester of moreau. we learned that when it comes to sexual assault, no one has to do everything, but everyone has to do something. i think that i can do more. i say in my mission statement that when one of us succeeds, we all succeed. likewise, when one of us doesn’t have the opportunity to succeed, none of us are fairly succeeding. i want to have more conversations like the ones we had in my writing and rhetoric class. as i said before, i have the privilege of being comfortable, when i should push myself out of my comfort zone. robin diangelo says in her article that, “we become highly fragile in conversations about race” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). i am definitely made uncomfortable by conversations about race, but that’s not a bad thing. i should be made uncomfortable because i, whether i like it or not, need to do more to solve the problem. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit lastly, i need to use the lessons about humanity that i learn in school and apply them to the real world. the world is bigger than my 14 by 14 foot dorm in duncan hall. i must go out and understand that not everyone is equipped with the same privileges and advantages as me. while writing my mission statement, i thought a lot about professor reifenberg’s article about going to south america and learning more about where people come from (“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). his story really stuck with me because i want to have a similar experience. that is why i illustrated the point in my mission statement: “any act of service towards others will always deepen interpersonal relationships, which will expand my overall capacity to love and be loved.” i want to love more and be loved more. i want to have totally new and exciting experiences. humanity is the world’s greatest gift, and i want to explore and embrace it. how i will think but how will i approach these new experiences that i’ve discussed? i need to be in the proper state of mind in order to do so. i’ve outlined a few points on the basis of my mission statement and the course material that i think will help guide me. first, i need to avoid wrongful introspection. second, i must allow myself to engage with dissonance and dissent. third, i must reevaluate myself on a regular basis. i think of wrongful introspection as invalid data. say, as a scientist, i run a test. i test different variables and find that the data is not what i initially expected. it looks rather scattered and in disarray. i don’t think the data is right. i don’t even think the data could be right. but i accept it nonetheless on the basis of scientific reasoning. now, the data is wrong, but i’ve just https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit accepted it as the truth. the same applies to introspection. week 6’s discussion on introspection talked about how “we eagerly pounce on whatever “insights” we find without questioning their validity or value” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i must make sure that the data that i collect from my own introspection is valid and has weight. i must challenge it and counter challenge it. only then will i decide what is personal truth and what is personal fiction. one of the main ways in which i plan on challenging my own ideas is by making sure that i do not live within an echo-chamber. i must allow myself to be challenged and i must then either defend or concede my point. echo chambers exist to halter personal growth. as professor blaschko (a friend of mine) said in his talk, “we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to. (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). as discussed in the previous section, i plan on going out into the world and engaging with people that are not like me and hold different perspectives. inevitably, i will encounter dissonance in those arenas. i must allow myself to be open to criticism and challenges. otherwise, i won’t have the opportunity to grow. a lighthearted example: my hall, duncan, has a rivalry with dunne across campus. i used to say i hated dunne… for no reason at all. over the last two weeks i’ve gone over there a lot and realized that they are some of the nicest people. my hall, duncan, was an echo chamber. i would yell “dunne is done” and 231 voices would respond. after escaping my echo chamber, i learned the truth, and i need to do more of that in my life. lastly, i need to reevaluate. my mission statement was a good starting point, but it’s not my ending point. i must continue to have that conversation with myself on a routine basis and ask myself how my mission statement would change. i plan on referring back to the plan in https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s moreau to accomplish this (“mission” by notre dame moreau fye week 13). it was a great exercise and is one that i should continue in the future. how i will live the last section of topics that i’ve categorized as important is answering the question: “how will i live?”. i’ve organized this section into three subsections: joy, career, and pace. firstly, i want to live a good life, a joyful life. but what does that look like? during week 3, we followed a model of evaluating a life well-lived. we asked ourselves three questions: what is my source of joy? is this something that gives me joy? and is it necessary and needed? (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). currently, i get joy out of people. i get joy out of building new relationships and strengthening the ones i already have. i want to keep using these questions to reevaluate my mission statement in the future and see where it needs to be adjusted. what’s changed? and what needs to change? additionally, i get joy out of being inspired. how will i be willing to grow and readjust my mission statement if i am not inspired to do so first? attending notre dame, i have found myself heavily inspired by one individual in particular, fr. hesburgh. prior to coming to notre dame, i had seen the hesburgh film twice. once when i got in and once when i decided that i was going. everytime, i learn something new not only about father hesburgh, but about myself. i leave the couch i’m on more willing to be a force for good. i want to surround myself with those influences throughout my academic career here at notre dame, but also out in the professional world as well. i want to be the guy, as the film puts it, who could bring people together as opposed to tearing them apart. when giving tours i make sure to spend two minutes talking about fr. hesburgh. i say that above all, he was the guy that could realize that “everyone liked to fish” and that was enough https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831/download?download_frd=1 (“hesburgh” by notre dame moreau fye week two). i’ve discussed wanting to be inspired in my career life, but what will that look like? i came to college for two main reasons. first, to set myself up for success in the career world. second, to meet new people and build new relationships. but how can i best discern what is the best career choice? i want to use my mission statement as a foundation to choose my career and positively affect the most people, but first i actually have to decide. reflecting on my future (which sounds a bit paradoxical), i must understand that there is no one major out there, but there is a best major out there for me (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). continuing on with week four, i’ve already changed my major twice trying to discern what the best course of action is for me and no one else. i hope to have more conversations with faculty and staff who can guide me in the final decision process when i fully land on my major next year (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). additionally, i must lean on my parents, friends, and peers to give me advice on what they perceive to be my greatest needs and personality traits. i had a conversation with my mother in week 5 about discernment (“discernment conversation” by moreau moreau fye week 5). when i asked her what i most needed to hear that might be hard to hear, she said that i need to slow down and think more. i need to often take stock in my life and be less caught up with the world around me. i think this advice is useful, especially for discernment. i need to practice the proper introspection mentioned earlier while evaluating what is most important in my life. in order to do so, i think i need to slow down. i’ve grown up in the digital age, i am inundated with technology from the second i wake up to the second i go to bed. it’s important, therefore, to slow down and eliminate some of these https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit distractions that i have grown accustomed to. during the first week of moreau, we learned about the internet sabbath and the importance of taking a day off. (“we need a secular sabbath” by ted ideas moreau fye week one). it is impossible for me to do any of the things i’ve mentioned, thinking the right way, embracing others the right way, and living the right way, if i always have a phone-barrier between me and the next person. therefore, i think it is important to get rid of technology in my life on occasion in order to take stock and realize what is most important, living up to my mission statement. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ finding the way to live a meaningful life: reflection and expectation of life “what is a meaningful life?” this is the question that was asked to myself during the spring semester of my freshman year. more than studying hard and making academic achievement, it was important to find the final goal of my life since the living without destination will soon lead to voidness of life. taking the philosophy and theology courses, i could find the way to live a meaningful life. my stating the personal mission statement, i would like to how i will pursue a meaningful life during the rest of the years in notre dame. the mission statement starts identifying myself. i am a notre dame student studying in mendoza college of business as business analytics major. when i came to notre dame, the goal of myself is to serve for the agricultural community in korea. the farmers in korea was suffering from the monopolization of distribution companies, and my ultimate goal is to organize a company that provides reasonable price to the farmers, preventing them from getting bankrupted. as rev. john jenkins said in the hesburgh film, “ted was a bridge-builder between people and god and among people” when he was commenting about fr. hesburgh’s life, my goal was also being such a figure, serving for the people who are suffering under the unfair system. as stated in mission statement of notre dame “the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice,” i decided to come to the school to pursue my goal. i believe that the meaningful life is a doing what i truly enjoy and finding good in that. the good is not personal or instrumental good, but it is a final good that benefits the entire society. fr. michael hime’s article “three key questions” states “the most important thing you can do in your life is to come to a point where you can say that, “this is a genuine me!”” in the article, fr. himes gives the three questions “what gives you joy?”, “what are you really good at?”, and “what do the people around you really need?” answering these three questions, i realized that the well-lived life is a comes from doing what i enjoy and making good relationships. to find the way toward the meaningful life, i found the career that gives me joy is in the field of consulting. in finding the career that fits me the best, i first reminded myself that god loves everyone, and therefore he has a grand plan for everyone. in the article, growing up gay and catholic, jacob walsh states a comment from a priest that “god doesn’t make shit,” i realized that god made us for a purpose and it is important to identify the purpose. then, how should i apply my acknowledgement of the meaningful life in to real world? first, as a college student, i think it is important to seek the career that i can find joy. as stated in navigating your career journey – meruelo family center for career development state “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters – just get our and experience life,” life is a journey to find myself and there is no answer in life and career. reminding this fact, i should find a career that i can truly do well and enjoy. before find the career, i should know who i am. meditation is a good way for self reflection. however, the way of meditating is important. according to tasha eurich, “if you ask why, [i think] you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality..” the meditation should be continuously focus on what kind of person i am, not why i am such kind of person. then, i need to passionately work to get the career. to get the career, i need to be aware of various temptations such as usage of electronic devices. today, the greatest threat is the smartphone and computer addiction. in the article “why we need to slow down our lives,” pico lyer says “i have encountered has beent aht the people who seem wisest about the necessity of placing limits on the newest technologies, which have bulldozed over so many of the limits of old.” the addiction and the side effect of the excessive about of information provides by the electric devices, i should limit myself of uses such devices. besides the career, i should also form good relationships. since humanity are social animals, it is impossible to live without interactions with others. the good relationships provides the most effective way for the self-reflection. during the discrement conversation activity for the moreau week five, i asked my friend to answer for the questions about what he thinks about things that i value the most. through the conversation i could recognize about values of me that i was not able to realize. to form a healthy relationship, first it is important to avoid the echo chamber and listen to other’s comments. according to dr. paul blaschko, in the video “how to avoid an echo chamber,” echo chamber is a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited. this is a great threat in active thinking and forming relationships, since the prejudice is formed by the echo chamber, and it dominated our way of thinking. pope fancis also emphasizes the need of being open-minded. he says “we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” genuine relationship is a relationship containing freedom of speech, and we can make them only through open-minded mindset. in the essay “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together,” steve reifenberg talks about his volunteer work in santiago, chile. he meets people who shows the value of accompanying. people of domingo savio didn’t support the author based on generosity. they just accompanied because they had to, without any other reasonings. the author later adds on the explanation of accompaniment. “accompaniment is, in some ways, like teaching. it is a practice. by being aware of what you’re trying to do, engaging in it, reflecting on experiences of it – both accompanying and being accompanied – you get better.” therefore relationships and accompaniment makes better life and personality. through the course, i learned about what is a meaningful life, and how should i pursue such life. as dean g. marcus cole said “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” about the black rights movement, the ultimate goal of the meaningful life is not doing for our own good, but it should be for the society, for the humanity. therefore to live a meaningful life, i need to find a career that provides me joy and moreover that could serve for the society. citations “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer – moreau week 1 “hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau week 2 “three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau week 3 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau week 4 discernment conversation activity – moreau week 5 “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau week 6 “why the only future worth. building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau week 7 “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau week 9 “growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau week 10 “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau week 11 “i am a george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau week 12 university of notre dame mission statement by university of notre dame – moreau week 13 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ integration two 12/3/21 lassen integration two finding the beauty in starting over we prepare ourselves as best we can for our college experience through tests, tours, and endless hours of decision making in order to make sure we will feel at home for our next four years. as the youngest of six children, i have been going on college visits since first grade. how could anyone possibly be better prepared for college than me? well despite my best efforts, nothing could have prepared me for this transition to a completely different way of life. immediately upon arrival, i started to worry about things i didn’t even know i could ever worry about. questions like, what time will i eat, and with whom? menial tasks and tiny parts of my daily life became these huge events that threatened to make or break my first semester of college. we are expected to immediately find our place and social media tells us lies about how everyone we know from high school already has a friend group after the first weekend. as expressed by another college student in a new york times article, “transitions are always hard — regardless of your age. but the social expectations around college put overwhelming pressure on students to fit in seamlessly into their campus, without truly acknowledging the difficulty of uprooting your life and starting fresh” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). bergmann’s perspective aligns with what every college freshman is truly thinking at the beginning, but if nobody expresses these fears openly, we all cower in ignorance alone. what really helped me to escape this was being honest with those around me about how i was feeling. i was able to become closer with people i’d met by expressing how i was finding this transition difficult. and everywhere i went, i was met with people who felt the same way and wanted to share how they felt discouraged and lonely. by talking about my experiences, i was able to make other people more comfortable to voice their own struggles. this way, we could bond over this tremendous change in our lives and work through it collectively. i was actively working to involve myself in the notre dame community, and even though i was outside of my comfort zone, i was making important developments. one of my favorite ideas from this half of the semester was from our discussion of community and how “long before community can be manifest in outward relationships, it must be present in the individual as ‘a capacity for connectedness’” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau fye week eleven). this idea of looking within yourself for strength is so important, especially because the beginning of college can feel so lonely. instead of dwelling on the fact that i was away from my family and friends, i relied on myself to better the situation. it is important for me to remember that only i can control my attitude towards a situation and by being honest with myself and others, i took charge to better my situation. another important part of this process is acknowledging that there is nothing wrong with having these fears and insecurities. of course we want to feel at home as soon as possible, but this is a long process that takes patience. there is nothing to be ashamed of, and for me this was https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ difficult at first. i began to dislike the personality i had created to try and fit in. instead of being myself, i was trying to be someone else in order to find friends. this, however, is unhealthy because i would never find true friends if i was not being myself. the best course of action is to be fully myself, with the good and the bad, in order to form authentic relationships. in my philosophy class this semester, we’ve discussed what it means to be your authentic self. the key idea was that in order to be our authentic selves, we must make choices that we can truly support. not just, “i did it because everyone else was” but instead “i did it because it makes me happy”. embracing every part of ourselves is key to building lasting relationships. just as i discussed earlier, community starts from within so we have to accept ourselves first in order to be accepted by others. this idea was highlighted in the video we watched about the japanese art of kintsugi, where shattered pottery is put back together with gold glue. this embracing of the beauty in brokenness shows how “the good, the bad, the ugly, all of that — it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today. and that that person is worth celebrating and honoring” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). when we embrace our whole selves, we can inspire confidence in others as well. when i openly shared my struggles with friends they not only agreed, but they wanted to help. this helped me on the way to healing and moving on from this difficult time. i found beauty in my brokenness by sharing it with others and commiserating. one of the most difficult parts of this time was keeping up hope. the weeks felt long and every minor inconvenience seemed to be the end of the world. when i had nobody around to comfort me, i lost my way and became utterly distressed. something that helped me find my way back was my faith. when i felt overwhelmed or alone, i would go to a mass or visit the grotto in order to get more in touch with myself. religious faith is just one way to do this, but the overarching idea is centering yourself around something constant. since i come from a religious household, this practice of going to a holy place reminded me of home and showed me that not everything in my life had changed. this physical manifestation of constancy helped me to stay hopeful for the future and put my trust in something that has comforted me all my life. everyone experiences difficulties in their lives and “one does not have to be a christian to believe that adversity does, or at least can, make people stronger and prepare them for harder challenges in the future” (“holy cross and christian education” by campus ministry moreau fye week twelve). knowing that everyone was facing these struggles helped me to confide in friends, but my hope was what kept me afloat in between. speaking with others about these struggles showed me how to move past them, but i had to look inside myself to learn how to grow. by keeping my faith and using that inner strength to put myself out there, i was able to meet wonderful people and i have already formed genuine relationships. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ https://campusministry.nd.edu/assets/105621/ moreau fye integration #3 : examining a life well lived i am heartbroken by the loss of sebastian, but i am honored by the opportunity to reflect upon his life in the most meaningful possible way. i would like to begin this reflection with a quote that was especially important to sebastian and summarized the way that he lived his life: “very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself in your way of thinking.” -marcus aurelius truly, it seemed as if sebastian had the key perspectives that drove his well lived life all figured out. a lifelong reader of stoic philosophy, sebastian learned from his early years to only focus on what he could control. he worked to strengthen his mind and his body throughout his life in order to be the best version of himself. he was a frequent at the gym, and realized the importance of making use out of the body and health he was gifted with. he was a lifelong learner and knew the impact that reading a little bit every day can have to shape your mind. he was an extremely hard worker and knew how to control and motivate his mind to get maximum efficiency out of his time. however, he knew that, as stated by a quote he enjoyed, “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) he realized that he could oftentimes get in his own head, so he made sure to practice positive psychology and be kind to himself when he needed to. some would even consider him to be overly conscientious, but he did not let the opinions of others guide his life. sebastian knew his limits, and he knew that happiness and balance were the keys to a well lived life. despite his desires to be in the best mental and physical shape at all times, sebastian knew that life was short and meant to be appreciated. he knew when to have fun, was outgoing, and loved to surround himself with people who were similar. he constantly tried to appreciate all aspects of lifethe good and the badbecause he realized that it was difficult to discern true goodness without having experienced the truly bad. this dichotomy between working hard and playing hard was especially evident while in college. sebastian would consistently stay up until two o’clock in the morning so that he could get all of his work done in order to go out and enjoy his weekends. however, because he valued the experience of learning, he found himself enjoying doing certain types of homework (except for calculus, calc was never fun.) another key aspect of stoic philosophy that sebastian adhered to was the concept of memento mori. as morbid as it sounds, sebastian kept in mind that he could die at any instant. this drove him to experience all that life had to offer constantly. he particularly liked this quote from sister aletheia where she says “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time; we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” (meet the https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) sebastian knew that there was no such thing as a constantly continuing life, so he strived to make the most out of every day possible. he was a frequent thrill seekersurfing, hiking, and drag-racing were some of his preferred hobbies. he also had a passion for travel and exploration. he was blessed enough to travel around the world. this was especially the case while in college, where he was able to go to such places as jerusalem, new zealand, greece, miami, new jersey, and so much more. he traveled to all of these places while surrounded by close friends and people he loved. sebastian took careful care in constantly building and improving relationships with those he loved to spend time with. his family members were the closest people to his heart, so he made sure to cherish all of the time he was able to spend with them. he was also a family man himself, with a wife and four kids whom he loved dearly. this was certainly the most important aspect of sebastian’s lifebigger than his career and bigger than himself. he put his family first and made no reservations about it. growing up as an only child with no cousins and as the last male member of the pires lineage, sebastian knew that he wanted a big family, so that is exactly what he did. sebastian’s career was an important feature of his life as well. while many people around him viewed their work as a means to compensation, sebastian had a vision of how he could serve the world. through working the business operations of major league baseball, one of sebastian’s oldest loves, he was able to grow the game and serves others in less fortunate financial situations than himself. he helped establish youth baseball programsa across the country, worked to expand the game internationally to developing markets, and made baseball a means of fostering social impact along with justice. his career brought him joy, was something he was good at doing, and was needed by those around him. (navigating your career journey by the merulo career center moreau fye week 4) sebastian was a mission-bound person, exhibiting a similar passion and commitment to others as fr. theodore hesburgh, constantly working to make his time on earth as meaningful as possible (hesburgh moreau fye week 2) sebastian’s life is perhaps something that is best remembered as an example. it is an example of how one can maximize their time alive while never sacrificing their present experiences for the goodness of their future. it is an example of the positive effect self-reflection can have, while not being overly self-depricating. it is an example of remaining free to new experiences while embracing and being grateful for what you already have. it is defined by a close relationship to god, as he guided sebastian through the good times and the bad. this was the core of sebastian’s existence, and helped him to focus on goals that was more than himself. it helped him to keep his intentions and mindset pure in regards to his future. sebastian will be dearly missed, but he certainly would not want anybody close to him grieving over the fact that he has transitioned to the next stage of life. instead, he say something along the lines of: “i am https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 dead and this fact was inevidable. instead of grieving, turn your tears into gladness. let me inspire you all to cherish the short time we have alive on earth so that we hold no regrets when our time eventually comes. god bless us all.” works cited: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau2 integration 1 valeria pérez negrón professor theo helm moreau fye mar 4, 2022 valeria: a canvas full of purposeful brushstrokes: valeria was a person who knew how to live her life remembering the importance of taking her time to appreciate life, live it to the fullest, while always searching how to help others. like everyone else, valeria was often overwhelmed by the daily work, responsibilities and stress of life, but she was not satisfied with living a life of anxieties and loneliness. after seeing that her personal performance was not the best when she was immersed in everyday problems, she learned to apply what she once saw in an article by pico iyer: “it's only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in a larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this directed the path of her life and it was at that moment that she decided to choose the brushstrokes that would create the canvas of her life. valeria worked every day to be a better person and be able to take advantage of her life. she looked for a way to focus her energy on achieving her vocation, and carrying it out looking to find joy in everything she did. she understood that many times the not so happy moments are the ones that taught her lessons. she always applied a quote from sister aletheia that said: “but it is actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). many times to find that light, she sought to trust others and their opinions about her strengths and weaknesses since she recognized how difficult it can sometimes be to self-diagnose oneself and to find what she could contribute https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html to make an impact on others lives. she listened to the opinion of the one who knew her best, her mother, and understood how her leadership ability could help others and how to have a greater impact she had to control and improve her sometimes lack of patience with people. valeria set herself to take this role of leadership throughout the rest of her life and applied father hesburgh wise words in her daily life: “but i took a stance for something and i wasn’t about to stop” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). valeria put herself to this task of becoming an instrument of change in the world and like hesburgh, she never gave up. early in her college life when she was at the university of notre dame, she understood that in order to know what she was capable of, she had to take risks. it was following these wise words: “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four), that she decided to follow at her young age of 19, what she thought her vocation was. valeria always showed love for community service and science. from a very young age, she stood out as a leader in her school and in community activities. managing to add value to the lives of the people around her. like all human beings, she also had her flaws, because it was sometimes difficult for her to have patience with those who did not have her same priorities and many times it was difficult for her to avoid getting frustrated, annoyed, and even avoid pressuring others to be like her. but something i tried to apply was that “anytime you're getting defensive you are getting less effective. when you get defensive your thinking become rigid and you simply become stupid” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). that's why i try to be more flexible and know the signs that let her know when she was losing her temper and getting https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 defensive. being able to be assertive and patient not only helped her in her student life, it also helped her to be a successful professional. she focused on looking for the positive side of situations that at first glance were not positive, and this way of looking at life helped her to combat the obstacles that came her way and allowed her to respond effectively. something important that valeria always kept in mind was the connection that her life had with other people and with the world in general. for her the feeling of connection with the others was very important. that is why she dedicated her life from a very young age to community service. trying to give those most in need a little of her time and effort. one of the activities that we all remember of valeria where she was able to have that feeling of connection, was when she helped to get decent health care services to disadvantaged communities. from collecting basic necessities for survivors of natural disasters, to participating in health clinics for indigent people, to collecting christmas toys for underprivileged children, these activities and many others marked the beginning of her trying to make a difference in the world and its meaning of connection and empathy with those most in need. she loved the words of pope francis who said, “everything is connected and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) and she always tried to live by them. but it was not easy, humanity has already lost that feeling of solidarity, we are so surrounded by need that many times we become immune to pain and continue our lives without caring about the pain of the other. many times she also had a hard time accepting what is different and not judging. fighting against stereotypes was something that she tried to overcome. she always talked about how as a child she was afraid of people on the street, because she let her ignorant, naive self, be led by prejudice and stereotypes imposed by society. through the years she matured and understood that they were only people https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript like her who, due to different situations, had ended up on the streets. it was so much that she wanted to connect and help these people that she even participated in health clinics aimed to help the homeless. this was a great lesson in valeria's life that helped learn from her experience and how not to judge others. today we can remember valeria as a person who tried to live a life with purpose. her constant desire to help and contribute to make a difference was palpable throughout her life. she lived a full life, where she was able to find a balance between work, responsibilities, enjoyment and helping others. today let's remember valeria as a woman who knew how to choose the best brushstrokes to make the canvas of her life, one that left indelible marks on the lives she touched and gave the world the best version of herself. she is our example to follow, let's try to emulate her principles of life. owen mcgoldrick moreau capstone in my first semester and a half at school, i have learned a lot about myself, who i am, and what i value. for the first time in my life it has been just me, and while i have developed a great support group of friends and others, i entered this year surrounded by strangers, without my family a thousand miles away. i learned a lot about my weaknesses more than my strengths, many of my weaknesses i had believed were strengths but turned out to be reliant on those around me and skills i truly had to work on to feel as they once did. work ethic and self motivation were examples of these and heavily impacted by my support system and comfortability with my situation at home. spending this past year in a new environment has helped me to both notice and embrace these. i strive to be the best version of myself for all those around me. whether it's being a better brother to my younger siblings, setting a good example for them to follow, being a better son to my parents, giving back to them what they have given to me, a better friend to those around me, hoping i can provide a fraction of the support they give me, or better citizen, leaving the things and places around me better than i found them. becoming complacent is extremely easy to do in a comfortable environment and switching up my life scenario has allowed me to see that. i hope to never become complacent, i firmly believe you can always improve and be better for yourself and the world. while you should always love yourself and have confidence in yourself, you can always improve and no one is ever truly perfect. it is hard to gauge success in today’s world as it can be measured in so many facets, but what i believe constitutes a life well lived is being a well rounded individual, giving back to not only those who have given to you, but those who cannot. i hope to not take a second of what i have and what i have been given for granted dand to live my life to the fullest every day, because we never know when the end is. i believe that no one is above anyone else and that with love and understanding, we cana all bring each other up as a species. (developing a mission statement moreau fye week 13) in my year in moreau i learned more about myself than i expected. i began the year (for lack of better term) bullshitting my weekly assignments, quickly looking for a quote and puting 200 words behind it, hoping to get my 20/20 to get myself across the street to notre dame. however, as my first semester continued i realized that many of my classmates were more similar to me than i had previously realized, that i could gain something other than an a from my 2 hours of combined classwork and class time. as the weeks progressed i began taking in more and more from the conversations and lessons we had, all of which seemed to be relevant to me, something i had never truly felt in a classroom environment nor knew how to deal with. i still felt this feeling coming into the second semester but i felt i had grown as a moreau student, student and person. weeks came and went but the lessons and ideas behind them didn’t. while i didn’t always express to the best of my ability i felt i was able to reflect on myself, my experiences, and my feelings better than i ever had before. coming to school i had a grossly heavy reliance on my phone. i felt as if i could not interact with my friends without it, while this is technically true with my family at home and my friends at other schools, i felt as if i would have a different relationship with the classmates who lived just doors down from me if my head wasn’t in my phone all day. ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) however, in both appreciating the beauty of where i am and the people around me, my life has changed for the better. i have reduced my screen time by over 2 hours per day compared to the beginning of the year, and there is still room for improvement. initially fearing a drag when i heard about the two hour documentary we had to watch for week two, i found fr. hesburgh’s drive to make the world a better place for everyone, as well as his national appeal while being a religious figure, is extremely interesting and inspiring. his love for the university and its people has allowed me to develop a deeper understanding of where my new home is and what it means to be here. hesburgh by christine o’malley and jerry barca moreau fye week 2) as i continue through my next 3 years at notre dame i hope my love and appreciation for the university will continue to grow. the readings and out of class assignments only have so much they can do, for me where my understanding of the lessons tends to heighten is in the in class conversations with classmates. specifically in weeks 3 and 4 this was true. week three’s passage was strange, written about a nun’s obsession with death. (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) i was taken aback by it and didn’t necessarily know how to feel about it. however, my classmates each seemed to have different and unique takes on the article, commenting how we should be thankful for each day, sharing this attitude for both ourselves and those around us. while i have been lucky enough to be relatively unaffected by death in my 18 years here (my grandfather being the only immediate family member or friend to pass) while you can never truly prepare for death or loss, seeing the reality of the world all around me and seeing my friends grieve has me as prepared as i believe i can be. but through all of this, the lesson of appreciation remains, for the people and places around us, and the so finite time we have with them. week 4 shifted the focus towards our futures and careers and while i left it without knowing my dream job and 50 year life plan down to the week, i did find a lot of people just like me. my parents have always pressured me to find what i want to do in life and fast, while this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, my situation is far from unusual. very few 18 year olds should know what they want to do, and i came to truly comprehend that. (moreau week 4 fye) in my week 5 conversation with my mother, i felt like i had grown from the person she knew me as at home. while she obviously knew my habits as well as anyone at home, i feel like in my first year in college i developed what i felt like was a new me. i struggled heavily in high school with procrastination and that hurt me a lot with assignments and even still this school year, having even more free time has just made that problem even more possible, but i have been trying hard to combat it, building schedules for myself and planning my work out before hand, something i hope to continue throughout college and even into my work life. (conversation with my mom moreau fye week 5) in week 6, reading dr. kim’s story about controlling the things you can, and the class lesson of mindfulness were both extremely interesting. i remember entering class a little angry and tired, i had forgotten about moreau until 20 minutes before class, having to make a speed walk across holy cross and notre dame just to be 3 minutes late. a little flustered, after our teacher led a mindfulness session i came out of it fresh and surprisingly content. anytime another teacher in a different class tried to do something along the same lines i never put myself into it, thinking it was a scam or not real and that theres no chance it would help so why even try. while i haven’t had the self drive to continue it myself, i have found myself in situations where stepping back, recentering my mind, and taking a deep breath has been invaluable. difficult times will never stop and having tools to combat them is essential. (ways to practice mindfulness mcdonald center for wellbeing moreau fye week 6) week 7’s tedtalk with pope francis was extremely interesting to me. he preached an idea of love for all and striving to improve everyone’s life. as the most important man in an extremely powerful organization, his declaration of love and equality amongst all can be seen as shocking, but it is his role as pope to grow the faith and those inside it. he also touched on and idea that i believe is extremely important equality. we are no better than the poorest of us, than the richest of us, than the most average of us. in this week i strengthened my previous beliefs and understandings, hearing from the pope that he felt similar was only motivation for me to continue to carry my ideals. why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7) relationships are arguably the most important aspect of life, whether its with family, lovers, coworkers, or passerbys, relationships dictate what we do, who we do it with, and why we do it. steve reifberg’s personal experience story in chile opened my eyes to this. most people in need, and those not in need, are not looking for a one sided help, they are looking for a relationship, accompaniment, giving back where they can. (a learning journey together by steve reifberg moreau fye week 9) allowing this to happen can be extremely rewarding for both parties and create unexpected bonds. mutually beneficial are healthy, while cutting toxic people out can be difficult, especially if they have been around for a while, in order to grow as a person it is essential. i hope to have the courage to cut out those who drag me down, those who i can’t help grow and don’t help me grow, and those who don’t put in the same effort as me. knowing self worth is important in the following week, i read jacob walsh’s “growing up gay and catholic,” i found his story of trials and self acceptance to be extremely interesting and empathizable even as someone who is straight. (growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10) i was able to relate story back to my uncles who were together and openly gay decades before i was born, raised in christian families. on top of this, i was able to have an extremely interesting conversation in class about prejudice with grace kayastha who has had experiences i cannot even imagine. it helped me realize the privilege i hold as a white, straight, chrisitian, male and that not everyone is able to live like i can. an understanding of others is essential to living in this world and in a new place with so many people from different backgrounds. i hope to continue that. in my opinion, one of the most important articles we read was how to avoid an echo chamber (by dr. paul blashko moreau fye week 11). in today’s climate we often listen to what we want to hear rather than what we should hear. if we fail to recognize the truth behind what is being told to us we can get trapped in dangerous cycles. this is why it is so important to be surrounded by people who challenge you, who believe different things than you, who come from different backgrounds than you. if we become complacent in our situations we can be trapped in these echo chambers and be blocked away from the rest of society and our loved ones. if we are always trying to develop and learn and meet new people this is nearly impossible and is a tremendous aid to various helpful social skills. i found it fitting that our final crr was about the article “i am george floyd.except i can breathe, i can do something” by marcus cole. the same article which started our journey this year, on the application to notre dame helped close it. getting to reflect on the same article more than a year apart i was able to notice the differences and similarities i saw and felt between the two times. most were similarities, i felt sympathy for dean cole, for what he and black people across america are forced to go through, and a call to action, to change the world and country we live in. however, i read the article through a different lense. in my first try my reflection was all about what i could say or think that would get me into school, this time there was less stress, a greater sense of openness about it and i gained a greater appreciation and comprehension of the article. in all, this year of school and moreau have given me more than i could have asked for. while i developed outside of moreau, the class helped me to realize all that has happened and what i still lack. i know that i will hold my values and lessons learned for the rest of my time at notre dame and continuation into the real world. moreau integration 2 my mission statement and how i will live my life throughout my life, i have cultivated and pushed myself to have a core set of values that will guide me throughout the rest of my life. in doing so, i have realized that “stepping farther back and standing still” allows you to “see what that canvas…really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, fye week 1). the canvas of the rest of my life is going to be driven by the same principles that pushed father hesburgh to be such an amazing figure. he was able to be such a key figure during the cold war as “he could talk with russian scientists and american scientists” and “they were pleased to have a mediator even if they didn’t believe in the catholic church but they respected him as a man of religion” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley, fye week 2). it is these values and stories that guide me to be a force for good and change in the world. i want to be someone that people rely on to do good in the world and that is able to be a powerful influence on the systems that have disadvantaged minority groups for decades. i see this as a vital issue of human existence because loving one’s self and loving our peers is important to preserving the bonds of human relations. i think this is because the “central issue in being a human being…is…agape a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other’” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes, fye week 3). additionally, i want to make sure that in my life, i am choosing the best path that can bring me to the forefront of systems that i need to work to change. i know that it will be hard to get there. however, in those moments of pain and desperation, find the things that you enjoy doing. know that “there’s no relationship between introspection and insight” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich, fye week 6). know yourself and how you respond to those tough moments so that you can overcome them and come out a stronger person. the things that will give you a fulfilling life are not the things that will make you the most money or make the most friends. it is the thing that makes you feel the happiest and you lose track of time. when you get to college, this is going to be so important because “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major’ for you” (navigating your career journey, meruelo family center for career development, fye week 4). no one can find the best major for you because it all comes down to exactly what you find most fulfilling in your life. this is why in your life, you should take advantage of those moments where you are stress-free and you feel as if you have all the time and ability in the world to explore your passions and who you want to be. you’ll learn this later in life but always remember to not “seek or rely on validation or recognition from others as my main source of happiness” (friend conversation, fye week 5). using others as a crutch for your own happiness or your purpose does not give you the fulfilling moments where you can feel completely happy with yourself. you will always feel as if you are acting just to get people to like you. however, there is a difference between relying on others and utilizing the friendships you have and the moments where you need your friends to support you. “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, fye week 7). there are always moments where you have to turn to your friends and find support in those who care most about you. taking care of and loving yourself doesn’t always come naturally or doesn’t always happen and in those moments, it is completely fine to turn to your support system and find the things that you love. finding those small moments where everyone loves each other and is happy with the way things are will give you the most gratitude and happiness. at the end of the day, living a life well-lived constitutes a lot of things. you have to balance your interpersonal relationships to stay mutually beneficial and not toxic for either side. find the passions and the things you love to do that makes work feel like a hobby. all in all, i know that you’ll be able to do it and take the lessons i’ve told you and make them part of your own life so you can be better than i ever was. i want to make sure that i am able to use my power for good. i want to constantly be a presence that others can rely on. i find that “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment, we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg, fye week 9). for example, the systemic racism that has been ingrained in our education systems for decades is something that i want to tackle and work on. in particular, creating conversations and spaces for all to learn about cultural backgrounds and become more understanding of the people who live in the us. recognizing that “socialized into a deeply internalized sense of superiority and entitlement that we are either not consciously aware of or can never admit to ourselves, we become highly fragile in conversations about race. we experience a challenge to our racial worldview as a challenge to our very identities as good, moral people. it also challenges our sense of rightful place in the hierarchy” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, fye week 10). additionally, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed. (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole, fye week 12). creating these spaces for conversation is also what will allow both me and those around me to recognize the ways in which our current habits have shaped our information intake. understanding “the differences between bubbles and echo chambers provides the key to understanding how we can protect ourselves against the dangers that each present to the way we form our beliefs” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, fye week 11). thus, i find my mission statement to be driven by the surroundings of my education and those who i have spent time with. i take inspiration from the notre dame mission statement and i seek to be someone who can pride himself on being a person that cultivates “a disciplined sensibility to the poverty, injustice, and oppression that burden the lives of so many” to serve those all around me (notre dame mission statement, fye week 13). murphy 1 taylor kelly moreau first year experience 28 april 2022 making a saint businesses, academic institutions, and companies often have mission statements. these statements articulately define the purpose and values of the given organization. however, the statements are useless if not acted upon. it is important to decide how to concretely fulfil one’s mission. in week 13 of moreau first year experience, students wrote a personal mission statement. my personal mission statement is as follows: is a catholic woman who is dedicated to reflecting jesus in every aspect in her life. she recognizes that she is imago dei, but because of original sin, she must make a conscious effort to become more like christ in her day-to-day life. one of her distinctive goals is to love all people. she does not have to particularly enjoy the company of a given person, but she must will his or her good at all times. this necessitates employing kindness and respect in every interaction she has. she is also committed to a search for truth. she realizes that she does not have all of the answers, but it is her responsibility to form herself as best she can so that she can be the best madeline she can be. in her search for truth, she respects others’ opinions and genuinely listens to their reasoning. she makes everyone feel heard—even if she does not agree with them. she also does diligent research and comes to rational conclusions. she tries to order her life to the most perfect good. she utilizes the catholic social teaching principals of common good, subsidiarity, and solidarity when she makes murphy 2 decisions. she does her best to accompany people patiently rather than rudely interfering with their lives. all she does is because of her love for christ and her desire to be his hands and feet on earth. (week 13) this mission statement is inspiring, but it is useless if not acted upon. through the knowledge and skills i learned in moreau first year experience and my freshman year, i will determine how to live my mission in the next three years. this semester, i attended a discernment retreat with the dominican sisters of mary, mother of the eucharist. they explained that the central aspect of dominican spirituality is “to contemplate and to share with others the fruits of one’s contemplation”. this motto is how i wish to structure my life. several weeks of moreau this semester stressed the importance of meditation, introspection (week 1), prayer, and reflection (week 6), which are all forms of contemplation. i am determined to pray each day and reflect on the day each night. this prayer will help me grow closer to god, which will help me clearly discern my vocation. part of a vocation is choosing a career path (week 4). this introspection, prayer, and reflection will help me know myself better, and i will use this knowledge to research different careers. i will additionally talk to trusted individuals who know me well to better discern my career path (week 5). i am almost certain i should be a teacher, but i will keep my mind open to other career paths. i know the lord works in mysterious ways, and i must be ready to follow wherever he leads me. after all, he knows best. it is so important that i listen to the lord in my decision making because i could die at any moment. we read a piece about “memento mori, a latin phrase meaning “remember your death” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham, week 3) during week 3. this piece was very eye-opening. by remembering i will die each day, i https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html murphy 3 remember the purpose of this life: to get to heaven and bring as many people as possible with me. keeping this in mind will help me make prudent decisions. additionally, writing my eulogy (week 8) was very effective in keeping me accountable to living the best way i can. it reminded me that the way i present myself will be the way people remember me forever. i want to be a saint, which is why i must start living like one now. many of the saints are not publicly recognized on earth as saints, but they are still in the communion of saints in heaven. these people lived christ’s mission on earth through small, daily tasks. i aspire to do this. the best way to be like christ is to love all. pope francis teaches that “the only future worth building includes everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”, pope francis, week 7). i must not discriminate against others. notre dame’s du lac policy articulately states, “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (notre dame du lac, week 10). in order to authentically live this policy, i must genuinely seek to understand others and walk in their shoes. without understanding, it is almost impossible to be compassionate and loving. to best understand others, i must avoid echo chambers. it is alright that i primarily spend time with other catholics in our own “notre dame bubble”, but i can’t surround myself solely with those who agree with me on everything. in “how to avoid an echo chamber”, dr. paul blaschko explains, “bubbles become echo-chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber”, dr. paul blaschko, week 11). i cannot shut people out who disagree with me. instead, i must make efforts to genuinely listen to their perspectives. i cannot listen with the intent to quickly refute their argument; i must listen with https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd murphy 4 the intent to understand. i need to respect others. like the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross says, “our mutual respect and shared undertaking should be a hopeful sign of the kingdom, and they are when others can behold how we love one another” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross”, week 12). lastly, and perhaps most importantly, i need to accompany others. (“teaching accompaniment”, steve reifenberg, week 9) i have to be a listening ear to anyone who may need me. after hearing how father hesburg would stay up into the wee hours of the night to speak with and listen to students who needed him (hesburg film, week 2), i decided i would be just that available for my friends. when i reach the pearly gates of heaven, st. peter will not ask, “why didn’t you get a good night’s sleep before that test? you really shouldn’t have stayed up to comfort and listen to your friend.” however, he might ask, “why did you prioritize schoolwork over the needs of your brothers and sisters?” this necessitates that i be ready to accompany anyone at any time. through prayer, inclusion, listening, and accompanying, i will live my mission through the next 3 years. i know i will not always live it perfectly, but i refuse to ever give up on it. it is based in truth, and living it will help me reach heaven. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau integration #3 richardson 1 professor taylor fys 10102 26 february 2022 a life of love: the eulogy of “it is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. the credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming.” – theodore roosevelt my mother lived by these words. she always strove to push her limits, to try and try again, never giving up in the pursuit of what drove her. whether it was in her career as an md-phd ovarian cancer researcher or as a mother to my brother and myself, she never gave up. she worked and worked until she excelled. as father michael himes stated, “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied.” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). she was never satisfied with not knowing the answers to questions that arose in her life, particularly those regarding her research, and she found joy in puzzling through these questions, in using her intellect and capabilities to find their answers. her work brought her such great joy because of its many puzzles. my grandparents always said to us that our mother would do a deep dive on any topic she found remotely interesting, wanting to absorb every bit of knowledge she could about a subject for the sake of learning alone. (“week five discernment conversation activity” with eric and tracy richardson moreau fye week five). she had a https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit richardson 2 love of learning, and she sought to instill this within her children. well, mom, you were successful. the same national parks you took us to as kids are now the places i’m sharing with my children. you’ve turned a 10-year-old and an 8-year-old into revolutionary war historians thanks to our recent trips to valley forge and independence hall. she also knew that all of life was a learning experience. every occurrence held a lesson to be learned. she strove to learn from all that had happened to her and to improve herself based on what she had learned. (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). she knew how to make the most of a bad situation and to ask the right questions in a situation, ones that would lead to answers and self-discovery instead of self-doubt. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, phd moreau fye week six). she listened to what god was telling her in any situation, and she did her best to answer his call. she was a fantastic mother and friend. she was selfless and loving to all she encountered. she never hesitated to help those in need if she was able. as mother teresa said, “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, in which he quotes mother teresa moreau fye week seven). this applied to my mother in all that she did. she was trustworthy and honest, a true friend to all she encountered. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). she had a fantastic caretaking nature. all who were treated by her as her patients were comforted, knowing they were in capable, caring hands. she was efficient, strong, and capable, but she was also soothing and warm. she was an amazing doctor, and she brought these qualities https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 richardson 3 into her research, as well. when she was working, she was in the zone. you could tell that she was exactly where god meant for her to be because she was performing at peak functionality. she was calm, collected, and successful, but she was also warm, funny, and charming. she had the perfect personality for her work, which enabled her to excel all the more at it. intellectually, she was capable, but her personality is what truly enabled her to face any of her work’s and life’s challenges with a brave face. she always cited her time at notre dame as a primary reason for her success. not only did it prepare her intellectually for her work, but it built her spirit, enabling her to grow into the person she was meant to be. it enabled her to be successful in her work and personal life. she also cared deeply for the places she loved. her beloved great smoky mountains, a place where she always found comfort and peace, were of great importance to her. they were as comforting and familiar to her as her home in northern kentucky. she always wanted to take care of them, leaving that beautiful place for future generations to learn from and enjoy, and her volunteer service with the national park service enabled her to do so. she found great joy in her volunteer work there. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). she loved nature. her beloved house in the kentucky countryside was in a perfect setting for her, surrounded by gentle, rolling hills and luscious forests, all in myriad shades of emerald. she dedicated hundreds of hours to fixing up our home, to shaping it into a space that reflected her and our family. complete with a cat sanctuary, a sunroom whose windows opened to let in refreshing spring breezes, and a library that housed the thousands of books she had collected throughout her life, our house was a space where all felt welcome. i loved growing up https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ richardson 4 there as much as she loved the hours she spent there playing piano, singing, writing novels, knitting, petting our cats, swimming, and building lincoln log cabins with her children and grandchildren. when she died, she was surrounded by her children, her grandchildren, her corgi, and the cats she had rescued. my father preceded her in his death, and now, i am so happy for them as they are finally reunited. my mother was an intelligent, brave, strong, caring, and funny woman. all who knew her were better because of it. emily, we miss you. you have touched our lives more than you know. integration 3: a life well-lived a pilgrim on her journey at the beginning of the semester, i realized that i am currently living a life that i will want to remember when i look back at it. so, i began writing a little bit everyday a few times a week about everything that was happening in my life. now, i have nineteen pages of writing on a document called “i want to remember.” on the first day i wrote “i can’t even imagine leaving here, the place that has become my home, and the people who have become my family! i already know i will miss it dearly someday.” now, reflecting on all of these entries, i have decided that a life well lived is one where we follow the paths god leads us down and love the people he puts in front of us. one of my favorite hymns is “the servant song.” one of the lines is “we are pilgrims on a journey, / we are trav'lers on the road; / we are here to help each other / walk the mile and bear the load.” the meruelo family center for career development compares planning for your career to preparing to go on a trip: “usually planning a trip is not a quick process depending on the nature of the trip but hopefully it’s also a bit fun and rewarding, especially if you end up having a really great time!” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). the steps i am making now for my career are preparing me to go on this journey. however, what makes planning a career different from planning a trip is that on trips you know your destinationfor one’s career, the future is much less clear. however, the lessons i have learned by going to campus ministry’s discernment coffee hours has helped me be at peace with this. someone made the point that no path that we choose to go down in life is bad, even if it ends up not being the path we pursue, because we will always learn something along the way. for example, while i’m glad that i decided to no longer pursue being a vocal performance major, i am forever grateful for the semester that i gave it a try. i got to see some beautiful singers, my voice and sight-reading skills improved dramatically, and the workload that came with it taught me how to appreciate the times when i wasn’t busy and have a positive outlook on working. in the end, as long as we choose a path that is going towards heaven, we can be at peace knowing that life is a journey with an eternal destination. to quote sister aletheia, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). we are pilgrims on a journey, and our final destination will always end as deathno matter what path in life we took. although some may see this as cryptic, remembering our true destination makes our purpose in life seem so simple, and since death can come at any moment, often the best thing we can do is worry less about the path ahead and try our best to live a life well-lived every day. the best evidence of why this is true can be seen on our sabbaths. in the words of pico iyer, “the sabbath recalls to us that, in the end, all our journeys have to bring us home. and we do not have to travel far to get away from our less considered habits. the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html source we already know” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i believe that god gave us sabbaths to remember the purpose of our journeys, that we are meant to enjoy life on the way to our destination, and to show us a small glimpse of what heaven will be like. we must have a chance to pause and reflect on our journeys if we are ever to know that we are living the life we are meant to live. for exactly the same reason we are given suffering. in the words of saint augustine, “the wayfarer traveling toward his homeland must not fall in love with a stable instead of a home” (exposition, 231). our final destination is not anything beautiful in this world, because everything that is beautiful is temporaryeverything grows old, everything fades, everything dies. we are fragile beings, and we are made to undergo suffering in our lives. in the words of dr kim, “the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that’s the reason how i was able to go through them and still trust in god and live with joy and gratitude” (“5 minutes” by dr. jihoon kim moreau fye week six). living a life well-lived means not becoming discouraged because of suffering. it is remembering that even christ allowed himself to suffer so that we might be free from suffering. in turn, christians are called to take up their own crosses out of love for christ. in the words of saint therese the little flower, “i want to suffer and even rejoice for love, for this is my way of scattering flowers. never a flower shall i find but its petals shall be scattered for you; and all the while i will sing; yes, always sing, even when gathering roses in the midst of thorns; and the longer and sharper the thorns may be, the sweeter shall be my song!” for this reason, i don’t see suffering as an obstacle to a life well-lived. rather, i see it as an opportunity to give my life more fully to god. the important thing to remember about our paths is that we never walk them alone. when looking back at what i wrote in my journal over the past month, all of the experiences about which i wrote were grounded in my relationship with the people i experienced them with. whether it was singing in the liturgical choir, helping my group mates in calc tutorial, going to a bible study at st. mary’s, or going to a faith group in my dorm, i would always be writing less about what i was doing than the people i was doing it with. when god puts people in our lives, often our paths can intertwine and these people become a part of our story instead of just background characters. who we are is so intertwined with our relationships with others because “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves” (“spring 2022 week five: discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” by andrew whittington moreau fye week five). the discernment conversation activity helped me see how others view me, and in turn taught me more about myself. this activity was an important reminder that we never walk alone on our journeys, and we are called to serve one another and “walk the mile and bear the load” with our brothers and sisters that god put into our lives. living a life well-lived means following the vocations given to us by god. i believe that my ultimate vocation is love, and that this love encompasses everything that i am to do in my life. it sounds simple enough, but the enemy that gets in the way of love is judgment, especially judgment of those who do not show us love back. in the words of pope francis, “even the harsh https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit judgment i hold in my heart against my brother or my sister, the open wound that was never cured, the offense that was never forgiven, the rancor that is only going to hurt me, are all instances of a fight that i carry within me, a flare deep in my heart that needs to be extinguished before it goes up in flames, leaving only ashes behind” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). reading back over my journal of this past month, i came across times where i battled the difficulty of living this vocation of love, and i responded to this difficulty by trying to see god in the people i had difficulty loving. in the words of saint therese, “true charity consists in bearing with all the defects of our neighbor, in not being surprised at his failings, and in being edified by his least virtues.” believing and having hope that people are capable of being good is what allows us to love one another. father hesburgh is an example of someone who lived like this: “what made him such an extraordinary figure was that he really didn’t belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind” ("hesburgh,” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). by believing in that truth, father hesburgh was able to bring change to this country and reveal the goodness in people that many others would not have seen. a few days ago, i went to the grotto with a group of students to pray a rosary for ukraine. in addition to praying for ukraine, we were called to follow the difficult commandment of loving our enemies and pray for putin and russia as well. often the best way to respond to the difficulty we experience in loving others is simply to pray for them, and pray that god gives them a desire for love and peace as well. in my final quote from saint therese, i will say that i believe “holiness consists simply in doing god's will, and being just what god wants us to be.” i hope to continue following whatever path god wants me to follow, and to continue loving the pilgrims with which i am on this journey. i hope to embrace suffering with love of christ, especially going into lent this year. i want to continue building the relationships i have started as we continue to share in god’s love. i hope to have a life well-lived every single day, and to always live life i will want to remember when i look back at it. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 integration three abigail moore moreau fye erik oswald february 26, 2022 stubborn inquiry became care became love some of us know abby as the well-dressed, exacting albeit curt professional and others of us know her as the kid way up in the tree who couldn't keep shoes on her feet or sand out of her hair, but i can only speak to who she was as i have known her. abby’s life was riddled with faults—always picking up the unwarranted argument, always choosing to be right before choosing to be kind, and always the last one ready to go. her slowness and stubbornness meant she required more than her fair share of patience, but those who persisted in their grace were rewarded in turn. she was slow, yes. dinner would be cold by the time she was done cooking it, you’d give her a book recommendation and wait months before she was done reading and ready to discuss, and lord help us if she was picking out candy and we wanted to make it to the movie on time. but this sluggishness was also a thoroughness and stillness. her movement was slow but intentioned and critical. unbothered by the limitations of efficiency, she could sit with something and work it all the way out to the end while everyone else buzzed by in the hurried sweep of life. the old japanese maxim, “‘don’t just do something. sit there,’” was surely not wasted on her (“why we need to slow our lives down” by pico lyer week 1). abby never acted just to do something. she was not afraid of motionless quiet or solitude and knew they had more worth than an endless stream of motion without cause. when you gave her a task, despite the lengthy time needed for her to complete it, you were guaranteed a level of excellence few would care enough to give, and she brought this attitude of slow, methodical carefulness to anything from cleaning a bathroom to completing a project at the architecture firm. this tenacious attention to detail drove much of her success in work and in the few close friendships she held. the truth is “[w]e don't prove anything by burning something down; we prove something by building it up,” and abby came into this world with a lot to prove—in a family with five kids there’s not much avoiding that (hesburgh week 2). despite all her attempts to push people down with her mischievous wit, she was a builder at heart. her thorough analyses could pick out faults and her resourcefulness responded with the necessary perfecting. we can see it in her buildings, and we can see it in the people who came here today to celebrate her life. any burning abby did was for the direct purpose of building it back better, and whether we liked it or not she was working us the same way with the loving but nagging desire to see us grow alongside her. to quote st. augustine and fr. micheal himes, “‘dissatisfaction is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us.’ it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes week 3). it is with that powerful dissatisfaction that inspired her to keep changing for the better. from investing herself in non-major courses that stirred her wonder at notre dame to studying abroad in high school and again in college, she was always seeking to deepen her perceptions. one question, one answer wasn’t enough for someone who admired the cat killed by curiosity. she sought new ways of looking at things, be it from the tops of tree branches as a kid or from asking the opinions of upperclassmen in the studio. i was honestly surprised when she decided to pursue architecture, a major with such a definitive path, considering “[t]here are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much right off the bat” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development week 4). perhaps it was healthy for her to limit herself in this way so that she could focus on her growth, her building, rather than getting bogged down by all the potential subjects she’d have liked to explore. her choice since has been confirmed by not only the artfulness and creativity she has showcased in the buildings she designed, but also in the thoughtfulness she brought to improving architecture as a craft, especially with her focus on sustainable construction. while her thoughtfulness in these areas has born much fruit, i know that it too—like her slowness and stubbornness—had a double edge. a good friend of hers, who is sitting in among us morners now, once cautioned: “if you keep thinking of yourself a certain way, you’ll probably stay that certain way” (conversation with lily, february 6, 2022, week 5). her pride brought on a mind-over-matter mentality and her stubbornness sealed it in stone. these traits fueled her in her walk from mexico to canada on the pct but also kept her stuck in her head. when the mind is so domineering and also so critical we get the pessimistic perspective we all watched her struggle to overcome. studies show that “self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich week 6). although many of us wished she saw herself as the sharp, dutiful, and illuminated adventurer we loved, her ever-working analytical mind painted a harsh self-image. while she exceeded many of our expectations in school and work thereafter, it is hard to say whether she ever met her own. i cannot deny that she bore a darkness with her, but she also learned how to balance it. loving other people freely does not come naturally to everyone, and that certainly was the case for abby. sometimes you’d have to weed through her brazen insults to find they wrapped her shyly intended love. to love for her was like a distasteful medicine that had to be dissolved, congealed, and ultimately disguised in a gummy bear vitamin of derision and apparent indifference. however, i witnessed her evolve. the realization that “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other” was a long time coming for her—someone who intrepidly leaned on her own independence (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis week 7). the connections she fostered during her time at notre dame and the few that lasted from before it helped to mold her heart into accepting and appreciating vulnerability, and it is that heart i know many of us mourn the loss of today. the abby i remember and hope to hold in my own heart until i join her among the dust was annoyingly slow and contrarian, fervently resilient and critical, and above all had a sparkling curiosity for this world and its people that matured into a deep and resonating love. salem prof. bushman moreau first-year experience 1 march 2022 integration three when looking back on the life of , one could conclude that he lived his life to the fullest. living a life well-lived is no easy task, one must garner the respect of those around them, have an imprint on his/her community, and express love to all around them. nicholas checked all these boxes. he would always be willing to assist those in need, by frequently helping out at his local homeless shelter as well as his parish by participating in giving out food and groceries. when walking through town, you would frequently drive, walk, or run past nicholas and would always be greeted with a larger-than-life smile and a hello. when he wasn’t walking around the streets of his small quaint town, he would be cracking jokes with his friends and making people laugh. even when things might not be going his way in life, you would never catch nicholas with his head down. he was a constant ray of sunshine even on the gloomiest of days. his laughter, jokes, and smile could brighten nearly anyone's day. we will look at how nicholas came to be this emblematic figure of a well-lived life. in his early years, he was what one would call an overthinker which would affect his positive attitude. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” throughout his teen years, he found himself getting caught up in minuscule things that simply don’t affect his life past that very day. taking a step back and really analyzing what he wanted with his life and what he could do to achieve it is something that changed his perspective and allowed his positivity to shine once again. for him, a career in computer science seemed to be the best opportunity for him. he felt that he could truly find fulfillment in it. “as a commissioned officer in the united states air force, captain michael hillmer ’17 has dedicated his life to the defense of his country. but his duty extends far beyond america’s borders. though his exceptional work ethic has served him well as a cyber operations officer, hillmer’s service also includes work to preserve local landmarks near his home on oahu, hawaii, and to support the families of his fellow military members.” when looking at the career and life of captain michael hillmer he had found to understand that a fulfilling career path is simply not linear. there are many branches that develop from your careers which make it even more worthwhile. in the captain’s case, he was able to live near his home and support families and his communities whilst concurrently serving and defending the country. in nicholas’ case, he would come to find that he could help many with his coding expertise. a perspective that opened nicholas’ mind was that of sister alethia, who believed that to live a fulfilling life one must reflect and accept death nearing closer. “sister aletheia rejects any suggestion that the practice is morbid. suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.’” the last line of this quote is truly powerful. we should not distract ourselves with falsehoods. in these falsehoods, we lose the authenticity that life brings and the most profound human ability of adaptation. sister aletheia has decided to live her life with the perspective that she will die someday whereas many believe that life simply keeps continuing. this sort of attitude never really affected him as a kid. but as he grow older he sensed a shift of worrying about the future more. so he began to accept this which allowed him to live in the present. finding his passion was extremely difficult. he went through highschool taking courses that really didn’t interest him. but when he came to college he knew exactly what he wanted to do, the possibilities were endless. “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." we also view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes. that sounds pretty good, right? i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed maybe it was something a friend for family member wanted you to do or a required course in high school.” he found this to be extremely true. the computer science major was located in the engineering school, so it is required that he took the generic engineering courses such as chemistry and physics. going through these courses his freshman year really has to demotivate however, he later was able to take two computer science classes that have reenergized my passion and allowed him to be overall happier. he would have meaningful conversations with his peers during this time to learn more about himself. for instance, he stated “when discussing the issues that were important to me i realized that this side of me had not really been highlighted here. usually, when hanging around these friends we stay on a more positive level and rarely talk about politics etc. i had the feeling that they would simply know my views and stances on specific issues but that was farthest from the truth.” communicating and letting others know who you really are is detrimental to achieving this life well lived and nicholas understood this at an early age. continuing on this thought of self-knowledge and reflection in college he continued to learn more about himself by reading and watching videos. one article in particular states, “so if asking why isn’t so helpful, what should we ask? a study by psychologists j. gregory hixon and william swann arrived at a simple answer… the lesson here: asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect.” at the time what he took from this article was this, “reading this article and watching the video made me realize the importance of self-reflection. to be completely honest i did not think it was rather important in the grand scheme of things. i always seemed to brush things off and move onwards with little reflection. i have been trying to live more at the moment than ponder on things that have already happened which compared to how i used to think in the past has been extremely effective.” this self-reflection was immensely responsible for taking him to where he ended up. lastly, relationships were his greatest asset. “solidarity is a term that many wish to erase from the dictionary. solidarity, however, is not an automatic mechanism. it cannot be programmed or controlled. it is a free response born from the heart of each and every one. yes, a free response! when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” rather than looking at life around him as something that was simply inherited, he looked at it as a gift. this actualization prompted him to appreciate all life around him and even be there for it. this combined with all other stories and traits about nicholas truly cement him as one who lived a life well-lived. work cited: iyer, pico. “why we need to slow down our lives.” ideas.ted.com, 4 nov. 2014, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/. “2021.” domer dozen, 9 sept. 2021, https://domerdozen.nd.edu/. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/. phd, tasha eurich. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way).” ideas.ted.com, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. francis, his holiness pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript. integration 3 lopez 1 professor chan 4 march 2022 moreau first year experience section 33 not death, but life “to us, death is exotic,” said joanna ebenstein, founder of morbid anatomy, a brooklyn-based enterprise that offers events and books focused on death, art and culture. “but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place” ( “meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times – moreau fye week 3). in this present age, the abundance of technology and medicine that we have around us makes it very easy to think that it is natural for a person to live a very long time until the cause of death is beyond the means we have to prevent it. however, many people before us in history did not get to have such long lives. of course, there are many unfortunate events that bring about death even sooner, such as violence and car crashes, but these often come as a surprise because of the conditions of the present age that i mentioned. the truth is that humans do not have a long time to live. everything we do with it must count. whether we are doing something or simply enjoying life as we should, we can live more purposefully if we understand that we, too, will pass away one day. so, what to do with this precious time? we can seek to acquire wealth, or fame, or power, but if we never stop to think about a better purpose, do those things really matter in the end? to figure this out, we need to take the https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html lopez 2 time to really question what we want to do with our lives in the long run, but also at our current stage in life. ”to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted – moreau fye week 1). in modern times, we are so completely surrounded by noise everywhere we go, that whenever we are without it, we often feel empty. when nicole was a child, she loved to go to the library. she would come out with a stack of books after hearing the satisfying beep of the book scanner, and would return in just a couple of weeks to devour more books. as she grew older, there came a certain point where she felt an emptiness from watching and reading fiction, feeling that she did not want to watch other people live their lives anymore – she wanted to live her own adventure. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters – just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). she realized that once she learned something about herself, the moment she embraced it was the moment that began to flourish. one such thing was her love of classical music. there were very few people at her school that she knew also loved classical music, so she felt out of place and tried to listen to the music that other people listened to. once she embraced that she loved classical music, she felt so much happier listening to it and allowing it to become a part of her identity. this is reflective of a time when she was seven, when she started playing the piano. she quit for a year since she did not want to practice as a child, but came back a year later after realizing that she loved to play. from that point, she grew and grew in her love of music and competed in piano competitions every year. in college, nicole wondered what direction she should take with her life. she wanted to be an engineer, but wondered if god would ever call her to religious life. from learning about https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ lopez 3 the saints as a child, she had the idea that religious life was the best path to sainthood. “you give up a life of wealth, marriage, and most of all, your freedom of choice” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). this is truly a beautiful form of giving oneself to god, but there are other forms as well. nicole found herself accepting an engineering job for research in her second semester of freshman year, which made her so excited she declared mechanical engineering as her major the next day. she felt that if god gave her such a strong desire to become an engineer, she should become one. and she did. a good friend that nicole met in her first year at notre dame, ali mauritson once said that what we do with our lives centers around the way in which we serve god (discernment activity – moreau fye week 5). nicole sought to serve god in her daily life, offering up her work for the conversion of sinners and other intentions. she created technology to help people, always with love and careful attention to the needs of the world. she was not a fierce character, but a tender and joyful one. “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone'' by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye week 7). in this way, she was able to live her daily life by being kind to others and serving god by serving them. it was not for her to understand why god gave her so many blessings in life; she could only thank him and use it to the fullest. she had many struggles as well, but she put her trust in god, allowing him to take care of her. “why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau fye week 6). nicole asked what she should do to serve the world, and she found it in engineering and her beautiful family of five children. while https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ lopez 4 we mourn her loss, we must take this as a reminder to celebrate her life and the life we are all given a chance to live. integration 3 she danced “i hope you dance” was the song that lindsey’s mother played to her throughout the entirety of her life. from simple moments of joy, to complex moments of pain, the song was played on repeat to remind lindsey of her inner strength and resilience in each moment of her life. while she attended sporadic dance classes during her adolescence, lindsey never grew into her ballet shoes; however, she still danced throughout her life. job interviews, conversations, breakdowns, and classes were all attended by lindsey’s willingness to be present and ‘dance’ during them. lived a full life; one that she shared with her family, friends, and each stranger she encountered. in determining the difference between happiness and joy, she was able to be present in each moment and each conversation she participated in. as father michael himes stated, “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ("three key questions" by father michael himesmoreau fye week 3). in her college yearswith this knowledge of joy versus happiness in her back pocketshe met some of her closest friends. with the confidence instilled in her through both her education and her experiences at the university of notre dame, lindsey was able to truly put herself out there and dive into each relationship or opportunity presented to her. in getting to know herself and allowing herself to grow, her eyes were opened to endless possibilities. as she was told in college, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). this being said, lindsey listened to her mother’s advice: “to take something you https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884?module_item_id=149291 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ like, and take something you’re good at, and make it your job”, which resulted in a career in law after earning her english and american studies undergraduate degrees. aside from her career, lindsey loved to travel, and she spent a majority of her youth contemplating which place she could possibly choose to settle in. however, she kept in mind that “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fye week one). while she spent a while trying to find herself and her ‘home’, she realized that it was right in front of her the entire time. home wasn’t a place, but the people she encountered in life that made her feel welcome and comfortable. when making similar important life decisions, lindsey frequently asked herself ‘what’ versus ‘why’. “ ‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). lindsey learned in her collegiate years that in holding on too tight to her past, she would never be able to move forward. however, she also learned that completely disregarding her past would not set her up for success in the future. in finding this balance in her academic and personal life her freshman year at notre dame, lindsey was able to build a strong foundation for her future and her career. although lindsey had an extremely successful career, she valued her relationships the most. at the end of the day, when she came home from work, she realized that the people she surrounded herself with were the people that she treasured a lot more than any grade, outcome, or applause she received. in a moving conversation with her best friend maddy while both girls were in college, maddy told lindsey something that changed her perspective forever. maddy told lindsey something difficult to say, but important for her to hear, which was that she tends to https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ be a ‘people pleaser’, and forget to put herself first. ( "conversation with maddy" moreau fye week 5). while maddy’s response was extremely helpful in shaping lindsey’s character as she aged, it also made lindsey realize the value of their friendship itself. with strong relationships that are founded in trust and love, there is the ability to grow and change as you challenge one another. in noting this, lindsey prioritized her relationships because they were the most consistent form of joy and weight in her life. in all of lindsey’s relationships, she put aside her differences amongst her peers and made note that “we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day we are all fishermen” ("hesburg" by kevin abbottmoreau fye week 2). in valuing her peers and family, lindsey can say that she lived a life-well-lived simply based upon her relationships. she found that with the disagreements and frustration she faced in this world, holding onto any anger would only set her back. lindsey learned in her life “that it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know” ("tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boylemoreau fye week 7). with this in mind, lindsey made sure to greet each stranger with a smile, and take the opportunity to get to know those around her on a personal level. in prioritizing acts of kindnesseven something as minor as holding the door open for someone, or complimenting someone’s shoeslindsey found fulfillment in the world around her. in finding beauty in each situation she endured and each problem she faced, she realized the amazing aspects of this world that went unnoticed in the earlier portion of her life. in “being where her feet were” each breath of each day, lindsey found the serenity within herself and within her life. on even the cloudiest days, lindsey knew that she had an amazing support system in the shape of her family and friends, and, in knowing this, she grew into the confident and successful woman that many grew to know and love. in dancing through life, lindsey https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/523775?module_item_id=167905 learned something valuable about the world and about herself: no matter where she went, the people she loved were always there in her heart. in learning that the world runs on love, lindsey lived a fulfilling life. capstone integration final hicks 1 david lassen moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 how do i pursue a life well-lived? during week 13, we discussed developing mission statements. my root beliefs revolved around my faith life and the importance of my family and friends. my beliefs also articulated that i would place good morals over anything else. i’ve come to realize that things like grades are important but being a good person matters more. placing emphasis on being a good person is the mindset i choose everyday. my days are numbered and every second is a gift from god. we have an obligation not to let this gift go to waste. god has always been at the forefront of my life and i think this is my deepest core value. living a life in accordance with what jesus has instructed me to do is how i live a life well-lived. success isn’t some lofty goal because every day has its successes. i can’t define my successes against anyone else’s because i am my own person with my unique set of skills and abilities. comparison is inefficient when we all have our own definitions of success but i am happier with my own interpretation of it than what others may tell me. the highest good in life for me is being that highest good for others. living in a manner where others benefit from the way you live your life is a priority for me. it leaves an impact. i think every relationship we have goes into a life well-lived. family, friends, and religious relationships are a given, but we also have an obligation to be a good neighbor. suffering may be an inevitable part of life, but it does not define us. it can be an asset we use to be able to help others through hardships. i’ve found that suffering opens the door for the most growth. embracing humanity means embracing every part of our neighbors, with their own suffering and hicks 2 flaws. i embrace the humanity of the world to embrace my own imperfection as well as the natural flaws of others. i grow in wisdom by listening to others and having an open mind. wisdom is an ongoing and active process. my responsibilities to others include being a good neighbor and loving them, whether they are close to me or not. love for others can be difficult sometimes, but overcoming personal pettiness to be a force for good is one of the most beneficial things in this life. this requires acting with courage, which to me means acting in a manner where other judgments don’t mean much because you realize your life is meant for others (the people here and also for god). to summarize my mission statement i would say: the purpose of my life is to live out my faith through being a good in the lives of others because i value humanity. i live each day in a way that betters myself, my neighbors, and my relationship with god (“mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). through these weeks of moreau, i was able to determine these key elements. week one taught me to practice self-reflection in a way that promotes my health. this tied into the part of my mission statement where i talked about success because i took time for myself to determine how i viewed and should view success moving forward. pico iyer discussed pondering in his book about the beauty in the art of stillness and said, “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest… who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote is discussing the nature of hard workers and go-getters. especially at a place like notre dame, i think a lot of people can have this mindset. we think that breaks are inefficient and that our time would be better used by studying more, or sleeping, or doing anything except focus on our own wellbeing. even intelligent and hardworking people can miss a basic understanding in life; we can’t keep on pushing ourselves for forever. this reminds me of our talk on imposter syndrome last semester in hicks 3 the sense that i think the busiest people can at times think it is bad on their part if they aren’t busy all the time. if they aren’t occupying their time, they can feel lazy or insufficient. when in reality, these typically overachievers have done so much good in their life but also more importantly need to focus on their own mental health and take a break. i have decided that success for me is just being a better person than i was yesterday and i intend to implement this by setting realistic goals and whenever i feel overwhelmed to practice quick breathwork. i think many people can take after fr. hesburgh if they need inspiration for a mission statement. for me, i adopted from him the importance of helping as many people as we can because we have an obligation to our neighbors, whether we are close to them or not. this pursues a life-well lived because it leaves the people we encountered better off than when we first met. but that isn’t always easy. fr hesburgh himself said, “...i took a stand for something, and i wasn’t about to stop” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). he took many stands throughout his life and he never did stop, even after stepping down as president. he was a major proponent of the civil rights movement and did not let things like politics or pressure deter him. i think it also shows his ability of not backing down from a challenge or reversing his beliefs. when you take a stand for something, you should be prepared for backlash. yet, he kept going. in my own life, i find myself wanting to backtrack or make my beliefs seem different from what they actually are just so i don’t get into arguments. however, fr. hesburgh showed what it meant to live a good life and stick by his beliefs but still being friends and knowing so many people. he didn’t pick and choose his neighbors, which is the same mindset i hope to enact. i will do this by surrounding myself with friends who encourage me to reach out to others rather than “stay safe.” hicks 4 with all this goodness in our lives, it can be natural to want to question it all. and by doing so, we can question if our life is well-lived currently. and i think the best way to do this is to focus on the fact our days are numbered. i integrated this in my mission statement because i want my days to be meaningful and to help others embrace our finite lives. this pursues a life well-lived because i am starting to live the best life i can, given the little time to do all that i want to accomplish and help others achieve. sister aletheia, who embraced memento mori, stated, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week three). most of us don’t want to accept the most basic aspects of life: we are born and then we die. it’s morbid to think in only those terms, but those are the facts. suffering and death are unavoidable. and because of this, if we only focus on the bright things that make us forget about the morbid ones, it isn’t genuine. i like this quote because it kind of felt like it was calling me out a bit. i choose to focus on the positivity in life, but i don’t think i should forget about the facts. toxic positivity can exist, and ignoring the realism of life can be quite harmful and actually make us worse off. because of this, i put a picture of a relative who passed away on my desk so i can think of them but also the limited aspect of our days on earth. one of our “missions” here would have to include what we decide to dedicate our lives to in terms of a job. although i may not know what that would be yet, i know that, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). it’s hard to plan for your own future when you don’t even know you. regardless of the career choices we make in life, we first have to know ourselves first before we make any sort of choice – whether that be marriage, friendships, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 5 moving, etc. at my high school, i think there was a great emphasis on getting to know ourselves. it wasn’t an easy task, but i’m glad i already started the process of knowing myself better. i think even through one semester of college i have gotten better at identifying my own values, beliefs, interests, personality, skills, and emotions. we can’t figure out decisions that involve others without first knowing ourselves. this fed into the part of my mission statement where i said that i don’t want to in the process of helping other people lose who i am as a person. i think it’s okay for me to take some time to myself to decide my career so that i can pursue the best life i can for myself. for these next years, i plan to dedicate just once a month to where i make sure all my career aspects and goals are up to date. determining these sorts of mantras requires outside help at times. the relationship i have with my parents is very important to me. relating back to career, they once told me, “... you can live a good life through a good career, sure, but you want to be remembered as who you were as a person, not who a boss determined you were” ("week five discernment conversation activity" by joyce and philip hicks – moreau fye week five). i think this also emphasizes my mission of relying on my network with the people i love but also realizing my own inner strength. some higherup may determine my worth to a company, but they’ll never be able to truly determine my own worth. i am more than the judgments of others. this pursues a life well-lived because it helps keep a positive attitude and focus to carry out our mission. in the next three years, i want to try to begin to realize that the little judgments don’t really matter in the end. petty comments about how a person looks won't matter at the end of our lives, but the kind of person we were will. my mission statement also focuses on a positive future. as was said earlier, i have tried to become a better self-reflector. afterall, “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 6 help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). to really live a life well-lived is to not be too trapped in our past, but to rather look forward to a better future. it’s all too easy to wonder why these bad things happen to us, instead of realizing what that taught us in order to improve our own future. as a kid, i was always taught to ask why. i was told to ask why to better understand other peoples’ perspectives, and yet i think i brought that over into my own questions for myself. but i think gaining this new perspective and knowledge to ask what makes much more sense. by shifting our focus away from the negatives of the past, we can look forward to what is to come (because we have learned from our “whys”). i think with the suffering i touched on in my statement, it gives a lot of room for growth. analyzing pain in a healthy manner can actually improve my life. in these next years, pain is inevitable so i hope to be able to work together with my friends, family, and faith in order to grow in and from my suffering. the main takeaway from crafting my statement was that relationships are the key to my life. in the end, i care most about my relationships with god, my family, and my friends. every one of my values comes second to those three. so it’s fitting that our pope also discussed the power of relationships when he said, "... the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven). life can’t really be lived well when you are on your own. relationships are what ties everyone together. by restoring our connections with other people, i think he’s saying that we also strengthen our other connections, such as with ourselves and the environment and our own faith beliefs. solidarity within these relationships cannot be forced but is a practiced and habitual act. i plan to carry out these thoughts by recognizing that nurturing relationships will only help everyone in the end, so https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 7 making some small sacrifices along the way is necessary. even a simple act of grabbing dinner with a distancing friend can make a big difference. but not just our friends need us at times, but our neighbors as well. we are called to help all those in need, even when it’s inconvenient. because of this, i talked about the highest good in life for me is being that highest good for others. this can be seen through the act of accompaniment, which is, “...like teaching. it is a practice. by being aware of what you’re trying to do, engaging in it, reflecting on experiences of it -both accompanying and being accompanied -you get better. like teaching and swimming and learning a new language, with accompaniment, you get better by awareness and by practice” (“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together” by steve reifenburg – moreau fye week nine). accompaniment is not always an easy path to follow, especially because it can feel unnatural at first. i think this quote is saying that to help others best by accompaniment you must actively choose that path for yourself. it’s a deep truth because you can’t passively live your life. having a life well-lived for me means helping others. but to do so, i must put in the effort. i have to be adaptive (and willing and able to do so) and actively engage in my present surroundings. in my time at notre dame and beyond i hope to carry this out by paying close attention to the people around me for when they need accompaniment more than ever. this can best be done by first getting involved. by getting involved, we have to learn to accept people who may be unlike ourselves. my mission statement touched on the fact that embracing humanity means embracing every part of our neighbors, with their own suffering and flaws. i embrace the humanity of the world to embrace my own imperfection as well as the natural flaws of others. in a world where politics, religion, and humanity can be at odds, this is important more than ever. this was touched on in an article by grotto that said, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 8 to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week ten). this was in reference to a conflicted man who was both catholic and gay, which seems contradictory to most. however, i think we should see empathy here and work to embrace humanity. when we face difficulties, it’s hard to see things clearly, even when we know it’s true. anything is possible through faith and god. it’s a deep insight because it can also show how we can’t tackle these divisions and problems on our own. for me, i like this quote because while i might not be a gay catholic, i now can understand their persepctive better. i also like it because it is a good mindset for me to have when i struggle with my own doubts in my faith. embracing humanity also means embracing my own humanity, and the flaws that come with it. to start that journey for me, i plan to start to recognize when i make judgments, of myself and others, and instead try to embrace all of our flaws so that we can work towards the more important aspects of life. in order to make these important decisions and live a life in which my mission statement can grow to better my life, wisdom is required. wisdom requires evaluating information of all kinds and, “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). the word “intentional” signals that it isn’t easy to make this choice but there are so many benefits that we can’t find by just stumbling upon them. wisdom takes effort, often outside our comfort zone. at least in my own house, i know my mom tends to tune into the same new providers just so she hears what she wants to hear – just to confirm what she already “knows.” i always thought that was weird and that nobody else did that, but i think the problem is that way too many people fall into the same boat. there are plenty of people in my life whom i may not agree with but i know they are still intelligent and sometimes well-informed people. i enjoy https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 9 being their friend because it opens me up to new perspectives i could never have thought of before. even if i don’t agree with them or end up changing my mind after talking with them, it’s still beneficial to intentionally learn from people different from yourself in order to gain knowledge, perspective, empathy, and understanding across cultures. this is exactly what i plan to continue doing in the future. reaching out to new cultures helps everyone grow in the process and helps to better improve our wisdom. acting in accordance with true wisdom requires courage. in my mission statement, i discussed acting in a manner where other judgments don’t mean much because you realize your life is meant for others (the people here and also for god). dr. martin luther king, jr. thought the same when he said, “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” (“'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). it’s easy for me to see how he gets from one deduction to the next. there’s a lot of truth to his idea. i think when you fear something or don’t know something, you start to make deductions that are oftentimes incorrect. i also think it’s key that he uses the word hate here, because i think hate is the strong reaction we have only when he misunderstands. i feel like if we dislike something, we’ve evaluated a situation and responded based on our preferences, but hate is used in a different colloquial sense most often. each one of us can choose to actually and finally end hate if we end this separation. if we come together, committed to make a change in the world, the world can become a better place. it’s a deep insight because i think it’s saying that problems come from a lack of understanding and communication and are often not because of actual hatred or disdain. i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 10 think this brings a more positive perspective to light and is more encouraging than commenting on and on about the problems in our world. if we act with this courage, we can achieve this wisdom for ourselves. this greatly helps a life well-lived because it helps tackle problems faster and on a larger scale. i first plan to do so in these next years by staying educated by simply checking for five minutes every morning the news. in conclusion, i pursue a life well-lived through my mission statement. the purpose of my life is to live out my faith through being a good in the lives of others because i value humanity. i live each day in a way that betters myself, my neighbors, and my relationship with god. capstone integration the pursuit of happiness personal mission statement: i am at my best when i am around people i care about as well as when i am around people that i know care about me. to me, the greatest feeling is that which comes from forming meaningful relationships. i had a wonderful childhood and have a great relationship with my parents. i have maintained relationships with my closest highschool friends but continue to meet new people. this year i’ve had the opportunity to expand my social circle and meet some incredibly fulfilling people. i am constantly striving for self improvement and i find joy in seeing others reach their full potential. i pride myself on achievement and take my goals seriously. i believe that goal setting is the greatest and most accessible form of measuring success. anyone can set goals, quantitative or qualitative, big or small. everyone should have some goals for themselves long and short term. these goals are something all people can bond over and i often use my aspirations to shape my personal brand. i make an effort to present myself as an easy going and determined person. i believe determination is a big part of my brand to represent the serious side of my personality. i hold myself to high standards through goal setting and find it fulfilling to build relationships and see those i care about succeed. one of the most important parts of my mission statement is my emphasis on authenticity and real world connection. i think it is important to maintain a healthy distance between real life and life on the internet. if i was able to, i wouldn’t be on my phone after friday night until monday morning. “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am (why we need to slow down our lives”, pico lyer, tedmoreau fye week one). i know i am my most genuine self when i am communicating with friends face to face. this semester i was able to reduce the amount of time i spent on electronics and cut down on social media apps as well as watching mindless television. i like to think that i live my life in the constant pursuit of happiness. “what gives you joy? what is the source of your joy?(three key questions, fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three)”. i find joy in accomplishments and knowing i have made days worthwhile. i make an effort at the end of every day to reflect on some positive thing that either happened to me or someone i care about. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life, (navigating your career journey, meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four)”. i pride myself on being able to live in the moment and not worry about the small things. i have set big goals that are long term but i believe it's important to be able to somewhat let go of bigger stresses and disassociate from bigger issues. it’s easy to get bogged down in all the assignments i have throughout the year. i've learned to find a good balance between taking things one day at a time and also making smart decisions to benefit myself in the long run. i’ve now started to make weekly goals that i know are achievable that help the time go by. the partner i picked to have the week 5 conversation with was my best friend from my dorm, jd brown. we started talking about why we think we became friends. jd is also someone who’s not afraid to tell you the truth. he is a very real and genuine person which i think is a major part of our friendship. i know he can hold me accountable and responsible for things that i do. i think we both hold each other to higher standards and push each other to be better people. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ “there are many ways to practice mindfulness both alone and in community, (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, ted conferences -moreau fye week six)”. this was one of the most introspective conversations i’ve ever had. there are not many times i’ve really discussed the depth of a friendship until this. this activity was one of the best examples of community mindfulness i could think of. i hope this can represent the importance of character in my mission statement. i have said before, i believe my common room is a place of inclusion. i have been able to witness the struggle of being different at a catholic university first hand. “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god, (du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre damemoreau fye week ten)”. one of my quad mates has been openly gay since december and i’ve tried to be supportive every step of the way. he explained the need to hide his sexuality from his uber-religious family for the majority of highschool years and his parents still don’t believe him when he tries to be honest with them. i couldn’t imagine what he had to go through back home and i know it was also very hard for him to come out to the other men in our dorm. although it may be hard for everyone to feel comfortable, college is all about expanding your horizon and being introduced to new ways of thinking. “an ideological bubble or social network naturally filters friends so he ends up hearing from a very narrow segment of the population, (how to avoid an echo chamber '' (dr. paul blaschko, thinkndmoreau fye week eleven)”. coming here, i was completely thrown out of my friend group and left on my own. now that i have had a fresh start, i’ve been able to pick my new set of friends, most of which are very different from me. i think i’ve made a conscious effort this year to break out of any social or political echo chamber. i think we can all put our differences aside and create a symbiotic relationship where people peacefully accompany and learn from each other.“each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles, (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. moreau fye week twelve”). i have had some other roommates that were definitely not what i expected, but i think i learned even more from them than they’ve learned from me. “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together, (steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine)”. the moreau first year class has been a great learning experience for me. it has helped me become more in touch with my emotions as well as teach me to be a better friend. i will continue to live by my mission statement through the rest of my academic career here at notre dame. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143990 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143990 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ mfye 2 integration three moreau first year experience integration three march 4, 2022 the lovely life of today we celebrate the life of . lily wanted to be remembered as a happy soul. someone who would go out of their way to help others. someone who had plentiful love in her heart, and who was willing to give a hand even if you were not her favorite. someone who was slow to judge, and accepting of everyone. someone who loved her family and those around her. i do not think that lily was on a mission to try and save the world. instead, she was always looking to be the best daughter, sister, aunt, granddaughter, cousin, mother, and friend. her personal role in others’ lives was more important to her than changing the world. she helped the people in her life work through trouble, cheered them on, and made them feel loved. her success influenced positive outcomes for the large circle of people that surrounded her (phone interview with pat lorenson by moreau fye two week five). she grew up in rural minnesota and graduated in 2021 from perham high school in perham, minnesota. she then went on to attend college at the university of notre dame. she graduated in 2025 with a degree in mechanical engineering, and she also obtained a business certificate through the university of minnesota. after college she worked at a small company which gave way for her to get a job she had always wanted. lily worked for john deere’s rdo equipment company in fargo, north dakota for many years. she got married and raised a lovely family. before her passing, lily enjoyed her retirement in her lake home with her husband, and loved to golf on the course where she had once worked her very first job as a teeenager. lily’s way of thinking ahead and wanting to be in control lead me to include a quote from miss ruth graham, a nun who told new york times, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye two week three). lily agreed that we run from things, thinking that we will find happiness that way. she thought that death was something you simply could not avoid. by living your life with this unavoidable thought in your mind, it allows you to cherish every day god gives you. a popular thing in the notre dame community, which lily became a part of, was hesburgh, the movie about father hesburgh’s life and his impact on notre dame. the last quote from dr. martin luther king jr. before they announce his death in the movie is, “there can be no great disappointment, where there is no great love,” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye two week two). he was talking about the war in vietnam. lily thought the quote was perfect for those circumstances, but also that it can be used in countless others, specifically, in everyday life. she thought it was good to keep in mind that disappointment does not simply come about, but instead, is a result of an action. she thought that though we can all be disappointed in someone, the disappointment came from the love and care we have for that person. one would not waste their time being disappointed if they did not love the person in question. she was like her mother in wanting everyone to use their heart to their advantage and use disappointment to teach a lesson instead of harsh words. the quote from dr. king goes along with one of lily’s favorite quotes, “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). she loved so many people, and she knew this quote to be very true. if you knew lily, you know that she was a family woman. with her caring for others, lily also prayed for them. she was known for her mindful practice of praying the rosary (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye two week six). she used much of her time to give to others. she spent much of her life – starting from her teenage years – volunteering, especially in food shelves and food banks. as an engineer, lily always felt like she was giving a hand to anyone who was using a product her work was involved in. notre dame tells people in their first year that, “there are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much right off the bat,” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye two week four). lily took this to heart and ran with the idea. her major was the most broad option in the engineering field. she was fond of this because she felt like she would be flexible enough to switch things up much later in life if needed. she ended up working exactly where she had dreamt of. all of her hard work paid off in the end. lily found such great happiness in her day-to-day life. she lived by her mother’s two-word, easy to remember advice, “choose happiness.” the happiness lily chose came from every little aspect of her life. she knew that, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need,” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye two week one). lily always liked to stop and think about the gifts she had received. she was always thankful for what she had, even if deep down she wanted more. she knew the importance of being grateful for what you have been given. she said her life would be well lived if she had few regrets. everything happens for a https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ reason, and if life didn’t go the way it did, with all its ups and downs, she would not have become who she was. lily’s life was inspiring. let us offer a moment of silence in honor of her life. may we all use lily as a role model for how we too can live a lovely life. thank you. works cited ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye two week one) ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye two week two) ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye two week three) (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye two week four) (phone interview with pat lorenson by moreau fye two week five) (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye two week six). (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript microsoft word final integration 3 mf.docx ferry 1 taylor kelly moreau fye 04 march 2022 the final chapter on my last few days on earth, i wonder whether or not i lived a life well-lived. the first thing i thought about is what i would like to be remembered by. throughout my entire life i’ve tried my best to serve others, spread love, and gain knowledge. one thing i loved, but also disliked about my life was how fast it seemed to go by. it feels like just yesterday i was seventeen years old walking through the arch of my high school and throwing my cap in the air. i wish i would’ve cherished every moment of high school, and although i did have a great experience, i was always looking forward and stressing about college. looking back on this, i realize that when we are constantly anticipating the future, we miss the present. if i were to give advice to the younger generation, i would tell them to slow down their lives and process every moment in the present—good or bad. i would tell them not to overlook the benefits of practicing mindfulness, and i would remind them to stop every once in a while and look back on how far they have come (week 1 practicing self-reflection). one of the benefits to slowing down and living in the present is you can really hone in on what truly brings you joy. in “three key questions” by fr. michael himes, fr. himes defines joy as: “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (pg.1). when i was young, i had an incorrect definition of joy; having lived my life, i now realize fr. himes was right. things that bring you joy are the things that feel “right”—the things that make you feel like yourself—the things that push you towards being the best version of yourself—the things that make you feel alive (week 3 ferry 2 questions of a life well-lived). to name a few, the things that brought me the most joy in my life were bonding with my siblings, going to college at the best university(in my opinion), going on spontaneous adventures with best friends, working at a job that i love, traveling the world, doing volunteer work, and making connections with people from so many different walks of life. i don’t think i would be as happy as i am currently if i didn’t have the college experience that i did. father theodore hesburgh, former president of the university of notre dame, my alma mater, said: “"if our lives in education have any meaning or significance, it will be in our reading the signs of the times and in educating the young of our times in the visions and values that will civilize and make for reasonable human progress and lasting peace on earth” (week 2 inspirations of a life well-lived). father hesburgh had such a huge impact on notre dame and the entire country that i don’t think anyone could even try to put into words. i remember when i was a young woman in my teenage years, i often did not feel heard, and because of this i had very low self-esteem and i couldn’t picture myself having any place in this world. when i came to notre dame, that changed. i was surrounded by the most brilliant young people that i had ever met and i was surrounded by determination, ambition, passion, and most importantly, faith. after watching the “hesburgh” documentary, i realized that the reason notre dame was so great was because of father hesburgh’s legacy. i feel so lucky that i was placed into an environment at such a young age where i could thrive academically, but also spiritually. also at notre dame, i met my best friends. i formed the most beautiful and strong relationships with my peers—my freshman year roommate became my maid of honor, i celebrated a 70-year friendiversary with the girl i met on move-in day, and i just said my final goodbye to the girl who i was randomly assigned to sit next to on the first day of moreau. my life would not have been nearly as fulfilling as it was without these relationships, along with the relationships i formed in high ferry 3 school and in my adulthood (week 7 relationships of a life well-lived). i graduated college with a double major in psychology and economics. i am so glad i took a leap of faith and decided to study in these two fields because i couldn’t be more satisfied with the career i pursued. combining my skills in working with numbers and mathematics with my problem-solving skills and passion for understanding the human condition, i truly enjoyed the work aspect of my life and i have no regrets (week 4 exploring a life well-lived). one thing i do regret is not appreciating and properly processing my failures. part of life and part of being a human is making mistakes and hitting bumps in the road. whenever i encountered obstacles whether that be externally or internally, i tried to smooth out every single imperfection. i tried to unravel every little problem because i thought that would make me complete—but it did not. in “the right way to be introspective,” tasha eurich says: “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences”(week 6 obstacles to a life well-lived). i grappled with this concept for a while but when my career and my relationships started getting more serious as i neared my thirties, i realized that over analyzing my feelings and emotions was bad for my mental health. once piece of advice i have for the younger generation is to let yourself feel all your emotions—the good and the bad—because if you don’t, if you suppress them or try to fully morally rationalize them, you will miss out on the small happy moments of everyday life. another thing i would encourage every person in every stage of life to do is talk. talk to your loved ones, talk to your coworkers, talk to your neighbors, talk to your peers, because you can learn to much from others. the world does not revolve around you, even though you may feel that way sometimes. everyone is living their own life and experiencing totally different experiences which is why conversing with others and appreciating human connection is so important. even if you’re not someone who likes to verbalize your ferry 4 thoughts or even acknowledge them, take a leap of faith and do it. it is especially important to talk to your loved ones as much as possible and show them how much you appreciate them before it’s too late (week 5 discerning a life well-lived). the final chapter of the story of my life is closing, and i am not afraid. to the person who is reading this, i want you to know that i realized my place in this world, and you have a place in this world too. the rest of your life awaits you, and if you think you are not living a life well-lived, it’s not too late to start. capstone integration capstone integration introspection: a pathway to accompaniment “if i could offer one piece of advice to carry with you for the rest of your life, it would be to learn from your mistakes. we are all going to get knocked down in life and face some difficult times. that’s life. life isn’t always sunshine and rainbows. in order to grow, we must first fail. what is important is how you adapt to these mistakes. do not let mistakes define you, but let them inspire you to put your foot in the ground and strive for better. especially as young adults here at the university of notre dame, each day provides us with new lessons. this is the first time in which we are living on our own, and this is a time of great development. if you can simply learn from your mistakes, you will find your own form of success. everyone’s definition of success is different. some people may believe that success is defined by accolades while others may think it is defined by the impact you have on others. i consider success to be having a positive influence on the people around you. if you can have a small group of people around you that you would do anything for and they would do anything for you, then i think you have been successful in developing meaningful relationships. i do not think that you need everyone to like you, as that is quite impossible. what matters is what those that know you best think about you. if they are proud of the person you have become, then you know you are doing the right thing” (“writing a personal mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). also, it is important that we step back from our lives and take in all of our blessings. after all, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/assignments/49371?module_item_id=144040 standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). it is so easy to get caught up in the hustle and hustle of our daily lives, but if we never take the time to reflect, then we will never learn to appreciate what we have. not only should we be grateful for ourr blessings, but we should use them to assist others. change donations does this and “is an international fundraising platform that helps nonprofits and schools grow with the power of spare change. the platform allows users to round up their purchases to the nearest dollar and donate the difference to their favorite causes” (“the domer dozen gallery” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week two). this reflection can also help us to picture our future and the direction in which we are headed. an example of this is memento mori. “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by becky clements moreau fye week three). these two questions are paired together because they are interconnected. if we have certain goals and aspirations in life, we must do what it takes each day to achieve them. the journey is an integral part of the destination. by focusing on the journey, we open ourselves up to growth. this is a critical time in our lives, as we start to filter down to what we hope our career path will be. however, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). by not giving certain fields or classes a shot, we ar limiting ourselves. we might be extremely talented in a certain area, but we will never know unless we try. this is something that my mother expressed her pride in me for during the discernment activity. she told me that she is very proud of all the different clubs and activities i have tried this first year as well as in high https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ school (“discernment activity” moreau fye week five). i am grateful to hear my mom’s perspective on my willingness to be open to new things. although the perspective of others can be helpful, we should also reflect on ourselves. “university of sydney psychologist anthony m. grant discovered that people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). by having a clear understanding of ourselves, we have a strong sense of our strengths and weaknesses. by being open about these in a relationship, we can be accountable and upfront with others. this allows us to let people in to our comfort zone. “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). if we never let anyone into our comfort zones, we will never be vulnerable or able to truly develop relationships. relationships do require vulnerability, but they also allow us to grow emotionally.” therefore, “i hope that when people think about me or reflect on my life, they see someone that was always willing to let others in” (“integration three” by moreau fye week eight).“ by doing this, i hope to be accompanied. steve reifenberg writes that “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). in this way, the people that i am in a relationship with and i will be able to help each other grow. accompaniment is essential as we are all created in the image and likeness of god, and are meant to take in his creation in harmony. this is evidenced in notre dame’s mission https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/assignments/49400?module_item_id=143866 http://sydney.edu.au/science/people/anthony.grant.php https://www.sbp-journal.com/index.php/sbp/article/view/1219 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/assignments/49339?module_item_id=143930 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/assignments/49339?module_item_id=143930 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 statement: “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (“the spirit of inlcusion at notre dame” in “du lac: a guide to student life” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). additionally, the way we interact online or get information online is important. “when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with and when we find others around us supporting and encouraging us to do so, we need to take a step back” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). we must be willing to listen and not automatically discredit views that differ from our own. if we discredit opposing viewpoints too easily, we prevent ourselves from growing and learning. this can help us to end the cycle of hate that has plauged this country. dean g. marcus cole claims that “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). we must be willing to welcome people that look different or come from different backgrounds than us. it is extremely helpful to learn about varying viewpoints so that we can develop complex mindsets. by doing all of these things, we can become exceptional members of the notre dame community and follow god’s will. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ as a first-year college student, there is much left for me to learn, and much more for me to accomplish. however, while i have come to accept my opportunity for further growth, i have also bound myself to a mission in hopes of achieving a life well lived. since being at notre dame, my sense of acceptance and belonging have been strengthened in a variety of manners, specifically altering my beliefs and personality. i have been challenged in wisdom, thought, and connection throughout this first year, and i would like to continue to push myself out of my comfort zone in the future. i believe that one of the largest factors in living a life well lived is finding a good balance of ambition and relaxation. often, life can be consumed by nonstop action, which breeds a state of satisfaction only with constant entertainment. philosopher blaise pascal discerns that, “all the unhappiness of men arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). in this way, i have discovered that my desire to always keep moving forward is actually having the opposite effect that i expect. instead of accomplishing everything, i often overwork myself and miss out on the small things in life; it’s better to slow life down and enjoy it fully. sitting stagnant is not bad, and practices like meditation, yoga, or just thinking would be majorly beneficial to ensuring the healthiest and most productive standards. however, i also believe we should cautiously live by the idea that fr. michael himes presents that, “the only time your vocation is settled is when you are settled (six feet under that is!)” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i believe this method is a great strategy to live life by to ensure i am getting the very most out of it, as icontinuously searching for the most joy is bound to somewhat provide it. of course, i think the best path to a life well lived is a good balance of these strategies. this is the perfect formula to experience just the right amount of stimulation and relaxation, which would produce an ultimate level of happiness in my life. another major factor of a life well lived is learning to consistently contemplate and reevaluate in a healthy manner. life is not the easiest thing to understand, by any means. it has ups, downs, expectations and surprises. for example, dr. jihoon kim lost most movement in his body in a snowboarding accident but he reflected by saying, “so as i began just thanking god and being more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). dr. kim is a prime example of how we can reflect upon our lives and learn to reevaluate the way we think. i believe practicing healthy and optimistic thoughts is essential to allowing myself to believe life can be good, and ultimately achieving it. another form of revaluation can emerge in the way we choose to judge others. in a 2020, notre dame graduate tia b. paulette formed a project which helped influence a case where, “elkhart county prosecutors dismissed a murder charge against andy royer, who spent 16 years in prison despite being innocent” (“domer dozen” by university of notre dame moreau fye week two). thinking with these terms of acceptance and understanding displayed in this case, are greatly important strategies to ensure a healthy and fair connection with the world. i hope to follow this approach of reevaluation and contemplation in life in the upcoming years, as a way to open new possibilities, view points, and overall forms of happiness; a necessity for a good life. one of my most serious standards for a life well lived involves connecting with others and forming strong relationships. i believe life is meant to be lived alongside others. in a ted talk delivered by the pope, he explains that, “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). we cannot live life completely on our own; there is a higher significance to life than that, and this significance is surfaced through relationships with others. i want to meet new people, accept their experiences, and ultimately make life interesting, fresh, and purposeful through its interactions. when i interviewed my girlfriend she concurred that, “i am a person who loves connecting with others, and sees it as a major role in my happiness” (“moreau discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week 5). i understand that through relationships, we are introduced to love, friendships, and belonging, which hold large significance in the happiness we feel day to day and in the long run. the meruelo family center for career development agrees with this claim in the way that, “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). i see the people and potential relationships around me as the greatest tool at my disposal. i wish to acquaint myself with family, friends, or authority figures who can share in my life journey, value me, and guide me willingly throughout. in response, i aim to embrace those around me just the same, who put their trust in me as someone who they desire a true relationship with. ultimately, relationships and connections with others are what makes the world variable and enables growth, so i have acknowledged that as a large part of achieving my most successful and happy life. another portion of my mission is to respond well to any hardships or suffering that stand in my way of enjoying life. sometimes we are let down, disappointed, or fail, but i believe it’s best to get back up and keep trying. anthropologist carolyn nordstrom presents the idea that, “as children we had great and amazing dreams, but slowly they are stifled as we get older. those dreams are still there waiting for the day that they will be awoken from their dormancy” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i plan to attempt to awaken those dreams by experiencing the world through supplementation and experience. i believe that approaching the world with this strategy, will ultimately breed meaningful change and inspire others to follow in these footsteps along the way. in a world that can often be glum, one-dimensional, and full of suffering, this approach would be key to making my life worth living. part of my mission towards achieving a life-well lived involves being accepting of all and embracing humanity. however, this can be difficult to achieve sometimes as we, myself included, often struggle with accepting and embracing ourselves. one article about embracing yourself features a priest telling a gay, catholic man, “‘i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,’ he told me. ‘you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). in this sense, my mission actually revolves more around learning to fully love myself for who i am. i have learned that loving yourself correctly offers the most true, accurate, and unconditional kind of acceptance in this world, which we all need in desire. in allowing myself to feel this self-love, i can experience life in a brighter manner, which will enable me to replicate and spread this acceptance and love to those around me, regardless of how different they are from me. helping others feel loved is a major goal of mine to help make the world around me happier and better, and ultimately give my life meaning. another major part of my mission is to grow in wisdom. often in life we become caught in echo-chambers, and we shut out ideas that oppose our opinion. for example, because sports fans have such strongly opposing opinions, it’s common practice that, “there's never a goal to convince a yankee fan to come to the red sox. it doesn't matter” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). while this example might seem trite, it represents how society truly handles itself. however, in my time at notre dame, i have come to know that there is a lot more to learn and experience than what’s at your fingertips. i’ve come to hear and accept the ideas of many who come from vastly different backgrounds than myself, and i have realized that this has helped me grow into a more mature and unbiasedly knowledgeable person: a feeling i believe replicating throughout the rest of my life will make it worthwhile. another pillar i hope to replicate is the ability to act courageously in life. i aspire to mimic the courage that jesus used, out of love, and an ultimate goodness, to unite people through our struggles and bind us together as one.the constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross discerns that, “the same spirit moved father moreau to found the community of holy cross in which we have responded to the call to serve christ” (“constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross” moreau fye week 12). instead of refraining from making hard decisions or being afraid of the consequences of my actions, i wish to always attempt to believe in myself, take a leap of faith, and at least offer a shot at making a difference and bringing people together. living by this standard would help me grow in wisdom and character tremendously, as it offers me the most authentic and fulfilling experience in life, as i devote myself to confidently doing what i want to with fortitude. at the end of the day, living a life well lived is based on opinion. only you can decide if your life was worthwhile, and only you can make an effort to make it so. in my opinion, i would believe i lived a life well-lived specifically if i stick to the core values i have instilled throughout my mission statement. these practices are essential standards to ensuring a life that brings about happiness, success, and overall satisfaction, and therefore would contribute to very worthwhile life for me. integration 3 maria finan moreau fye march 4, 2022 advice for existing: a letter to a younger me a life well-lived is difficult to define. at age five, you would have imagined this life as days filled with kayaks and vegetable gardens and laughter, never letting go of the hands of your parents. a few years later, and a life well-lived would have meant reading as many books as humanly possible in the span of a lifetime, becoming a writer, and doing ballet on the side. perhaps soon enough you’d reach an age where the image of this life would simply mean being good as you can be; a period of naivety where the world was still easily definable, and being purely and completely good seemed like a goal easily in reach. but as you get older, this picture becomes blurry. it becomes more difficult to find the intersection between what you want, what you can achieve, and what you value. and so, at age eighteen, here i am sitting down in front of this metaphorical mirror, and asking myself what i have come to understand about what it means to truly live life well. “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one).” i think that this quote, from the beginning of the semester, showcases the importance of slowing down and appreciating life. i don’t think there has ever been a version of myself that was content with the pace of life. what might be my earliest memory is one of a younger madeline bawling in the living room because she wasn’t ready to be four years old. by age eleven, i was wishing the days away, counting down towards summer or a holiday or any future plan that seemed more enjoyable than the present. at the present time in my life, i find myself caught between the two; the days are busy and never long enough, while the weeks fly by before i can make enough memories. taking moments to stop and appreciate the present is something that i am continually working on, but i really do believe that you can’t experience a life well-lived if you’re never actually living in the present. i think that the version of myself to which this letter is directed is a madeline existing on a precipice. i can honestly say that i had a beautiful childhood. there were endless summer nights on the lake with grandparents, koi fish ponds and cherry tomatoes in the spring, family recipes in the evenings. the younger version of me was gifted a worldview full of optimism and hope and security. but at age twelve, i was diagnosed with osteosarcoma, otherwise known as bone cancer. if i could go back in time, i don’t think that i would warn younger me of this twist of fate, but nevertheless this experience has had significant influence on how i view the concept of a life well-lived. “in my faith, you learn that there is meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two).” this quote from a film we watched earlier in the semester does a good job of communicating my perspective on my experience of having cancer. the time i spent undergoing cancer treatment was difficult. it’s an exhausting and painful process, but it also brought a sense of meaningfulness to my life that i think was crucial in my development into the present version of myself. it pushed me off the precipice of naivety and into the reality of what it means to live: to endure a full range of human experiences and to be able to find beauty and meaning in them all. perhaps as best said by sister theresa aletheia noble, “… it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three).” i’m not sure that it would be true to say that i am grateful that i had to endure what i have, but i do believe that my experiences have allowed me to appreciate life with a greater perspective. life is difficult for everyone, at different times and in many different ways, but i think that the greatest lesson i’ve learned from my past is that to live means to endure and appreciate every moment. from the moments of overwhelming grief to the purest of joys, and all the ordinary moments in between, i think that a life well-lived means appreciating the expansive variability of life for what it is. as i moved past that chapter of my life, i found myself both thrilled and intimidated by the prospect of having to actually plan the life that i had fought so hard to get back to. even though i’d made the irreversible decision to have my leg amputated just a couple years before arriving at college (a longer, cancer-related story for another time), somehow choosing a major and career path seemed much more permanent. one quote from this semester’s moreau fye course that brought me some clarity and comfort throughout the discernment process was that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major” for you ("navigating your career journey" from the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four).” i think that a life well-lived means using our time to do something that we enjoy, which we have some aptitude for, and that has some meaningful positive impact. i have found the difficulty i’ve had throughout my discernment process resulted from focusing too much on any one of these individual pillars. i could think of majors that seemed interesting but that i didn’t seem to possess any natural talent for. there were other options that i seemed fit for skill-wise that i didn’t believe i’d enjoy. and i felt this looming obligation to follow a medical-related path, because it seemed to be the avenue for good that aligned the most with my past. now, with my current major, i seem to have found space for all three of these key parts. my advice to my younger self is to let go of expectations for yourself based on what you think “makes sense” in the eyes of others. one avenue for finding an individually-tailored concept of a life well-lived is to discuss with the people around you who know you the best. a conversation that i had with my parents was an eye-opening chance to see myself from the perspective of someone else (conversation discernment activity moreau fye week five). my discussion with my parents was a very grounding experience for me. caught up in the success-driven buzz of college, for a time i lost sight of the lessons that younger me had gone through the pain-staking process of learning. my parents reminded me that a life well-lived is one with a foundation of happiness and wellness, regardless of level of ambition or success. you can’t do what you’re good at, do what you love, or do good for others if you don’t make time to care for yourself. on the topic of reminders, i have spent much of this letter reflecting on past versions of myself, but it’s important to know when to stop looking into the past. often, a life well-lived requires an ability to know where to draw the line between looking for lessons and digging up buried regrets. one way i’ve learned to draw that boundary this semester is by bringing my assessment of situations back to the present. especially in the ever-busy routine of college life, i’ve found that the best way to feel better in a moment is to ask myself what i’m feeling and, if it’s something not-so-great, what i need to remedy it, rather than picking apart everything that i could have done differently in the past. as put by tasha eurich in an article from this semester of moreau fye, “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six).” finally, a life well-lived cannot be lived in isolation. the relationships that we foster with other people are perhaps the most defining characteristic of our lives. our friendships, communities, and impacts on those around us are the mark we leave behind on the world after we’re gone. to truly take advantage of the breadth of life means to open ourselves up to the possibility of love and friendship with others “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention ( “chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven).” i think that this quote from fr. greg boyle does a really beautiful job of explaining the possibility for belonging and love and unity that the world has to offer. i truly believe that a life well-lived doesn’t rely on any marker of success, wealth, or even accomplishment. to me, a life well-lived is one in which we do our very best to be as good to others as we possibly can, and in which we open ourselves up to accepting that same experience of goodness for ourselves. all the best, madeline integration 4 john austin hatch moreau fye integration 4 prof. chan the response to the prompt i am a human being, and as such, my mission is to know, love and serve god. for this i was made, regardless of my beliefs, and in adhering to this i will be happiest. the first of these goals, to know god, is achieved through prayer. both active and passive, vocal and mental, prayer is a conversation in which god reveals himself to me, and shows how i should love him and serve him. knowing god also involves understanding his creation, beginning with myself, and extending to other people and the world he has created for me. to serve god is to do his will, in deeds and thoughts. most of the time this means doing my work well, as an offering to him, in service to his people. this also means serving his poor, and adding my friends to the ranks of his faithful. finally, to love god is to do both of these things out of my free will, for his glory. this task is not one i can complete on my own merit but, paradoxically, it is the one i am designed to do. i was created not to fulfill my purpose but to be fulfilled. for this i was created, and for this i should live, since all other paths lead to suffering. it’s funny. usually, when i write a paper for a class, i am the one who provides the evidence that supports my conclusion. and that is when the paper is about something far less personal and open ended. yet this time, when i am supposed to be even more personal and free thinking, the evidence is provided for me, whether or not it supports the conclusion i want. while this could imply that there is only one way to pursue a life well lived, an answer which i fully support, it does not. the evidence is as non-conclusive as possible. that being said, i will continue with the disclaimer that some evidence i cite may not actually support my mission statement. an important part of fulfilling my mission statement is cultivating virtuous habits. there are many of these, both natural and supernatural. some of these are more abstract, such as the ones mentioned by fr. michael himes, “two key virtues are crucial to give oneself away: wisdom and courage. wisdom is more than knowledge and wisdom preeminently knows that the other is other.” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). similarly, pico lyer’s comments on meditation focus on the idea itself. “it's been found by scientists that meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains. this has no more to do with religion or any other kind of doctrine than a trip to the (mental) health club might.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer moreau fye week one). dr. d’angelo has a similar approach for a different virtue, “taking action to address our own racism, the racism of other whites, and the racism embedded in our institutions” (why it's so hard to talk to white people about racism by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). my friend will, also spoke on a particular virtue (or vice) in the abstract. “i think something that’s difficult to say, but good for you to hear, is that you can be rather passive.” (william grannis moreau fye week 5). all of these quotes talk about virtues, but focus on the virtue itself rather than achieving it. others, however, focus more on the habituation process. dr. kim presents a practical way that he found to situate prayer in his day. forced by his medical condition to rest for 5 minutes every so often, he reframed this time into something productive. “‘how can i use these 5 minutes?’ and i decided to pray to god for those 5 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202?module_item_id=145988 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit minutes.” (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week six). dean marcus cole also used his position and unique environment to create concrete goals, if not exactly habits, to achieve change. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed.” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' by dean marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). this is what i hope to do in the next three years. assess my situation, with whatever nuances it has, and turn those peculiarities into opportunities to improve in virtue. why should i do this? because who i am, and what i do in big situations, is built on what i do in small situations. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not.” (navigating your career journey by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this slow buildup of virtue can become something big. as father hesburg said, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up.” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). this is how i can avoid falling into complexes such as this. “on the other end of the spectrum are sophisticated pessimists… dismantling the “white savior complex,” they are skeptical about international development making any positive contribution in the world.” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). or this “what's political hobbyism is not whether you think it's deadly serious or not. it's whether the emotion is the end in itself or a means to an end. so in short-cut politics, in hobbyism, emotion is the goal.” (passion isn't enough by eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven). instead, i hope to act and do what i can, rather than forming theories. then i will be able to reach heights the likes of which pope francis spoke of when he said, “and what is https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ tenderness? it is the love that comes close and becomes real. it is a movement that starts from our heart and reaches the eyes, the ears and the hands.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week seven) https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript david lassen moreau semester 2 april 29th, 2022 cargo in tow this past year has been the shortest and longest year of my life so far. i say this because it feels like it has flown by faster than i can comprehend, but i can also recall moments of struggle or overwhelming joy that seemed to last an eternity. over the past two semesters, the sheer volume of experiences i have gone through has been more than i thought possible. periods of monotony were surprisingly brief, as i realized that there were things to be done every single day of my time here, academic or otherwise. the sheer number of significant encounters and complex relationships has brought clarity to my personal mission statement as it exists now. i am often meditating on my own experiences and indulging in introspection, but i am now pairing this with much more present thinking. at the very beginning of the semester, i reflected on the quote, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” and countered it saying that it ignored the value of looking at the little things in life that can hold incredible significance (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye semester week one). looking back, my thinking and view of the world was being severely limited due to a large number of mental health problems and negative thoughts that i was experiencing at that point. i now realize that taking a “bigger picture” perspective and taking smaller things into account are not mutually exclusive. father hesburgh was a perfect example of this (hesburgh produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fys semester 2 week 2). he was able to put his all into his relationships with small acts of kindness and incredible consideration for those he cared about, and that allowed him to more effectively operate as a force for good on the world stage. in my life, i have begun to find that an examined personal life and a worldly perspective are complementary. as i learn from my own experiences and relationships, my perspective of the world as a whole seemingly becomes healthier and optimistic. my worldview is becoming more authentic. i see the good life as a life lived authentically. authenticity in this case is primarily authenticity to myself. in being authentic with myself, i am naturally authentic with others. this path to authenticity is infinitely ongoing, as there will always be more to discover about myself and the world around me. in week 3, we learned about sister alethia, a nun who encourages people to face their deaths. i noticed that her thinking resonated with me when she said, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fys semester 2 week 3). i do not think the cliche of “living life to the fullest” encapsulates the breadth of experiences i want to have. i am not looking to have the most possible “good experiences.” i am looking to have the most experiences, good or bad. as i mentioned before, i have faced many challenges this semester, but i do not regret having faced them. i see distinct changes in myself that would have never come about otherwise. i think one of the biggest changes has come about in how i interact and communicate with the people i care about. in week 4, a survey from the meruelo family center of career development posed the question, “what is something you are doing when you lose track of time,” which i responded to by saying, “i lose track of time when i am surrounded by people i love” (“seven clues: an interactive assessment activity” moreau fys semester 2 week 4). in a relationship that i will not go into full detail about, i was reminded of the extreme importance of being authentic with myself about my own feelings and the importance of communicating those meanings to the people i care about. in this case, an inability to share authentic feelings from both sides resulted in a full breakdown of the relationship. we gradually became friendly with each other again, but up until recently, the fallout from our inability to communicate hung over our heads. a recent conversation in which we fully laid out how we felt finally lifted this burden. it is easy enough to float in life, but i view floating as stagnation. i want to fly through life, filling my days with intentionality, acknowledging imperfections and appreciating the beauty in them. i had always been told that communication, however awkward or painful in the moment, was better than keeping things bottled up until something happens, but this situation fully confirmed that. delusions i come up with to protect myself may provide temporary relief from my troubles, but they only delay, or in some cases amplify, the pain. in my life, excessive escapism is the enemy. i find that i can ground myself quickly by asking for outside perspective from someone close to me. the discernment conversation i had with my in week 5 helped me ground myself in a moment where i needed this grounding desperately. in the midst of grief over the dissolved relationship mentioned above, we talked about the positive attributes i possess. he told me that two of my most admirable qualities were my ability to talk with anybody and my ability to grasp complex things quickly. both of these things are extremely important in maintaining and building relationships, but i realized that even though i found talking with people relatively easy, i had to work on confronting awkward or painful topics when necessary. in week 6, we directly tackled the subject of introspection that i have touched on a bit already. dr. tasha uerich perfectly captured the problem with this feet-dragging behavior in saying that, “it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action”(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha uerich phd moreau fys semester 2 week 6). earlier in this reflection, i used the word stagnation to describe a passive life. stagnant water festers, and this festering chokes out life with poisons and rot. the longer i tried to avoid pain in vain, the more serious the suffocation became. i stepped up and had the conversation i had to and the water began to flow again. the world moves on whether we like it or not, and you will end up eroding away if you try to stop that movement. this necessitation of motion means that relationships are ever shifting, too. though it seems oxymoronic, there can be elements of stability in these mercurial things. in week 7, we read an excerpt from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle which showed the development of strong relationships against great odds. the stubborn and violent gang members that father greg works with have almost no remorse for their actions, and he remarks that “bridging the gulf of mutual judgment and replacing it with kinship is tricky indeed”, but his seemingly infinite patience prevails (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fys semester 2 week 7). the friendships that father greg forms with these men are so strong because of the obstacles that were overcome to achieve them. in my own life, i have seen the same trend. friendships and relationships that have been “battle-tested” are the ones that are stronger than ever now. even if the conditions are treacherous, i will brave the waves that come with any relationship worth maintaining. i will maintain flexibility and an experimental mindset, but not at the cost of commitment. i will never let desire for ever-changing and evolving environments and situations jeopardize commitments to those i love. on a broader scale, i will try to put my resources (time, labor, money, etc.) into helping soothe some of the suffering in the world. in week 9, the concept of accompaniment was introduced. accompaniment creates a common ground for those in need and those serving them as it “ inverts the impulse of ‘how do we help them?’ into an assertion—‘we’re in this together’” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fys semester 2 week 9). in my pursuit of new experiences and knowledge, i will not be an impartial observer. even if there are no universal truths or laws or values, i will create and abide by my own. given that all lives have the same potential as my own, i will view others as equals worthy of support and love. ignoring suffering in the world would be entirely inauthentic. therefore, i will work to alleviate pains in the world as i go about my life. notre dame tries to encourage an altruistic mentality in all of its students, but it can only do so much. in week 10, we looked at the portion of the university’s mission statement that pertains to inclusivity and support for people of all backgrounds. the university states that it strives to “create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish,” but even if the university itself is not actively racist, sexist, homophobic, or transphobic, it is a reality that an unsettling portion of the student body is (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac: a guide to student life moreau fys semester 2 week 10). because the university can only do so much, i have realized that it falls upon the student body to be the force that drives out these prejudices. it is vital that i do my best to call this behavior out when i see it. if i do not do so, there is no guarantee that anyone else will. some may see this as some form of the ever feared “cancel culture,” but there is a difference between stifling someone’s viewpoint because you disagree with them and calling out bigotry for what it is. in no way do i want notre dame to become an echo chamber in which the belief is that “those who dissent are only doing so because they lack willpower” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fys semester 2 week 11). i would like to create the polar opposite environment, one in which all are accepted and respected even if they have glaring cultural and ideological differences. i think this will make up a large portion of my mission for the next three years. week 12 asked us the root question of this socially conscious semester of moreau, how we can grow our courage to act. the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross highlighted a key element that makes the unjust forces we are trying to fight against in saying, “there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fys semester 2 week 12). the shrouded nature of these deleterious systems of oppression necessitates extreme diligence. an elite institution like notre dame is precisely the type of place that can use intellectual firepower to take on these labyrinthian structures. all of these points that i have laid out will serve as guideposts for the next three years of my life here and out in the world. authenticity is of the utmost importance to me, and seeking to alleviate the suffering of others is exactly the authentic venture that will define the next chapters of my story. i will refuse to be complacent when i encounter injustice. i will aim my studies in computer science and sustainability in a direction that is suited for practical and direct action against environmental disaster and the underlying prejudice that so often comes with such issues. in moments where i feel alone, it may be hard to go on, but i will remind myself that struggling against that loneliness and hopelessness is rewarding in and of itself. i will allow myself to rely on the people i love and who love me to stay firm in my goals when they seem futile. i believe that my determination will only increase as i see the results of my hard work. this is the current trajectory of my life, and i will do everything in my power to keep it that way. capstone integration tom o’connor 4/29/22 pursuit of the good life throughout the course of my first year at notre dame and the moreau course, i have gained a better understanding about what it means to live a good life. ultimately i have found that living a life well-lived comes from a combination of finding meaning in life and self-improvement. college is a time of growth, and both of these goals are vital to living a good life in the future. because of this, it is my mission statement that i should aim to find meaning in my life and pursue growth at all times. i have found that meditation is a great way to grow and find what is truly important. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape”(“why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer”moreau fye week 1). this quote shows the importance of pauses in our busy lives in order to search for our essence. it is through pauses in daily life and reflection in assignments such as the last integration (moreau fye week 8) that i am able to better understand myself. i have been intentional about the questions that i ask when reflecting. i realized that “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich-moreau fye week 6). these questions have allowed me to think rationally and understand if i am in an echo chamber or developing my thoughts on my own (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. blaschko moreau fye week 11). this helped me better understand my feelings towards my current life, and through meditation i have found the validity in the statement that “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes-moreau fye week 3). i https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 have understood that i often allow myself to become satisfied with my situation instead of pursuing more and growing from this pursuit through my meditation. meaning can come from the career that is chosen. earlier in the school year, i was unsure about the engineering major i wanted to pursue and turned to the internet for help. however i found the quote that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’”(“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services-moreau fye week 4) reigns true. i decided to pick the degree which i thought i would be happiest doing, and this will allow me to have a more meaningful career. partaking in a conversation with a friend helped immensely for understanding the career that is best for me since they knew me better than myself in some ways (moreau fye week 5). i also believe that growth can come from understanding the commonality between humanity. father hesburgh saw this when he said: “mr president, we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we were all fishermen”(hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). it is because of this common nature found in all of humanity that we should act with tenderness. pope francis said:“tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility. “(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). this shows the strength that comes from treating others well.there is often a weakness associated with being good to each other, but i believe that this is the strongest thing that one can do. this sense of inclusion should be felt in all communities, and christianity is no exception. “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript community” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). it is important to understand different perspectives in order to achieve inclusion. there is a lot of evil that attacks those with less power, and it is the job of the community to allow every voice to be heard. while an action that someone takes may not directly impact you, it can lead to harm in a community. “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us”(dean g. marcus cole 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' moreau fye week 12). it is in these times where communities are going through turmoil that accompaniment is necessary. “accompaniment doesn’t necessarily mean solving the other’s problem, and in fact, in some cases, as in accompanying someone who is terminally ill, there is no ‘solution’”(teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). by being there for others, we can show that we care for their struggles and have a meaningful connection with them. in order to find meaning in life, we must pursue a mission. by defining my mission statement (moreau fye week 13). i am more aware of what i want in life. it is my goal to make myself better as an individual each day. this can be done by setting goals and aiming to treat everyone with tenderness, love, and compassion. i hope that i am able to find meaning through a career and connecting with others in order to live a happy life. a meaningful life is something that everyone wants to achieve, and i believe that my first year experience at notre dame has given me the tools to achieve this goal. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit 4/29/22 a class ends. a mission begins. my mission is to grow into a tree firm enough to withstand my past and future, strong enough to provide a spot to rest, stable enough to be relied upon, kind enough to extend fruit, and loving enough to fall. i believe my experience has placed me in a position where i can accompany others, but i need to develop my mental and situational security first. i am a daughter, granddaughter, sister, niece, and friend. at some point, i will likely become a wife and mother. i do and will regard my family as my priority. i will spend time with my aging family members: make their hobbies my own, call, make memories. i know firsthand the limitations of time and refuse to feel regret later because of neglect now. having learned from watching my parents that your children’s lives are greater than your own, i will do all i can, now and forever, so that my children become greater than me. i will only marry for real love, and i will work, as i saw my parents work, to cultivate that love each day. this being said, i understand that the full saying is not “blood is thicker than water” but that the “blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.” i will value every good person i encounter and do my best to build personal connections and mutual trust because life is the people you meet. i want to pursue justice in all of its forms embarking on a journey of solidarity when possible and service when not. i will remember my own history and that of my family so that i never forget the importance of the individual’s safety, opportunity, and happiness. i will pursue a cleaner, safer approach to resource handling and energy creation in hopes of achieving a sustainable relationship with humanity and the environment. the first step i will take over the next three years to achieve my mission is to confront my grief because if one of my goals is to be able to help others heal, i need to be willing to heal. i refused a therapist when my mom began to go. i went once, sat in silence, and left early. my mom stopped bringing it up, but she did not forget. during the conversation we had together for my moreau week five qqc, when i asked her for a critique, she told me she wished i was not too stubborn to accept help. she said my silence frightens her. i thought i was dealing, that i only needed my family and myself. i know now that i was just repressing. dr. eurich, states, “if you ask why, [i think] you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd – moreau fye week six). she’s right. i never felt better when i tried to be introspective because i tended to interrogate myself with ‘why’ questions. my answers were too mean because i was conscious of not making them too soft. i was trapped in a cycle where i would feel worse as a result of introspection and, not realizing the cause, would try to right myself through introspection. the moreau family center for career development states, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). this cycle and the subsequent realization of its harm is what convinced me of the importance of therapy. this semester, i joined a group for students like me. in meetings, a licensed therapist who specializes in grief and a faith https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ counselor guided our conversation. they kept our introspection beneficial. i left with answers, resources, support, a sense of belonging, and a lighter heart. next semester, i will do any meetings or screenings required by st. liam’s and begin to meet weekly for one-on-one sessions with a therapist. continuing my efforts to grow my character, my next step in realizing my mission will be to delete all of my social media accounts. in the moreau week eleven curriculum, dr. blaschko advises, “we need to ask ourselves whether . . . we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). social media companies make their money by selling their users. to increase the amount of time users interact, apps tailor their displays to best match the interests the user shows. this causes individuals to become radical in their beliefs, as they are not shown content that opposes their opinions. it is a system that turns neighbors into enemies as people hyper-fixate on the divisions that separate instead of the ties that bind. the congregation of the holy cross states, “like [all people] we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like [all people] we are made new by the same lord’s love; like [all people] we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross – moreau fye week twelve). catholics believe humanity to be one body as children of god. we are inherently connected. the best way to ensure that your social media usage does not cause you to forget this is to not use media. therefore, i will delete my accounts in my pursuit of a life that emphasizes kind thought and joint action. in the second week of the moreau curriculum, students were asked to write about a recent domer dozen. i wrote about nate alexander, who had graduated and then created a program that shortens the time it takes to transfer organs from the donor to the hospital. he reminded me of the power of a notre dame education. over the next three years, i will pursue my mission by working hard in my classes and doing my best to pursue the opportunities offered by notre dame in my free time. i am an environmental engineering major with a minor in energy studies. a secure job gained through a combination of a good transcript and undergraduate research will allow me to pursue environmental justice as well as grant me the financial stability to extend aid to others. as for what specific opportunities i will pursue, i will continue my involvement with the center for social concerns. i have been selected as a leader for next semester’s appalachian seminar. i will take advantage of this chance to grow my leadership capabilities and remind myself of my dream to go back after graduation and use my degree to make a real difference for my people. living so far north, it is easy for me to separate myself from the sadder truths of my home. this experience forces me to confront reality while increasing the optimism with which i regard the situation. as reifenberg quotes ophelia dahl in his “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ”, “to not be optimistic is just about the most privileged thing you can be . . . if you can be pessimistic, you are basically deciding that there’s no hope for a whole group of people who can’t afford to think that way” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). if kids way up here can care, i have to believe things can be better. i also plan to sign up for the act justly seminar in the spring, which concerns the historical and modern conflict between race and justice in the south, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit in an effort to confront my privilege and biases. dr. diangelo states, “the first step in fighting white fragility is being willing to tolerate the discomfort associated with an honest appraisal and discussion of our internalized superiority and racial privilege” (“what it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo – moreau fye week ten). documentaries and podcasts have their purpose, but there is a discomfort in physical experiences that forces growth. my next step in achieving my mission is to remember that i will die. living like you will always have tomorrow only leads to regret. by remembering my upcoming death each day, i will become more passionate in my pursuit of my goals, say “i love you” at the end of each phone call, have the courage to take opportunities presented, and hug tightly in parting. to quote sister theresa aletheia noble, “it’s . . . in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). this mentality does not mean i plan to live in ceaseless movement. pico iyer advises his readers, “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). one aspect of living with an “oncoming bus” mentality is prioritizing your loved ones. i plan to do this by sitting there. when i am home, i will sit as papau explains his favorite strategies in chess and mimi her secret to sewing corners. i will sit, after work in the den, leaning against mom as she watches reruns. i’ll sit in the sun and listen to my sisters argue over the next book for our book club. i’ll sit and stargaze and cloud watch with my friends and remember all that they share. pope francis once said, “each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven). in morea week eight, when i had to write my own eulogy, i concluded that i would feel that i succeeded in life if i was described, by any or all, as a bright candle. i put this quote up on my corkboard in my dorm room. at home, i will write it on my whiteboard. the last thing i will do to achieve my mission is to read this quote each day because it is my mission, just in much fewer words. it is a reminder of what is important, a motivator when my too-full plate wobbles. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau spring integration iii lelonis 1 theo helm moreau fye spring 4 march 2022 living for death upon reading the prompt of this integration, my initial thoughts were that it seemed quite peculiar. after all, a living person being instructed to write their own eulogy seems a bit counterintuitive, no?. however, i quickly realized that this is less about writing a literal eulogy than it is about digging deeper into myself, channeling my metacognition in order to formulate a path of growth and development in life. this is about how i want to live, how i want to be remembered, and how i plan to create and leave the legacy i so covet. when the inevitable day comes that i meet my demise, one of the most important things that i want to be remembered for is having left it all on the table. one of the key components of this integration is about defining a life well-lived, and that is how i would define it. to me, a life well lived is a life lived to the maximum potential. i aspire to take risks, cease opportunities, fail, succeed, all of it. i truly believe that chances make champions, and that failure is one of the best catalysts for internal growth. during the semester, i picked up on this sentiment: “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by the murelo family center moreau fye week four). at face value, this may appear mundane or cheesy, but deep down i couldn't agree more. during finals week last semester, i quite literally failed a test, receiving the lowest grade i have ever earned in my life. at first, this was disheartening, but i quickly realized that the only thing i could do was move on and grow. i intend on doing this for the rest of my life, rolling with the punches and fighting https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ lelonis 2 whatever adversity is thrown my way. additionally, another key component to a life well-lived for me would be living for the right reasons. early in the semester, we read about technology and the slowing down of life. an article we read during week one stated, “i’d be richer in what i prize most: days and hours” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyers moreau fye week one). this resonated heavily with me, as everyday i strive to appreciate the things with true, fundamental importance more and more. as a matter of fact, i would argue that what holds the most fundamental importance is also the most valuable currency in life: time. at school, i often find myself stressed out and exhausted due to the heaps of work and exams. however, i am becoming better at putting my head down and smiling because one day i know i will miss the early mornings and late nights. when we find ourselves on our deathbeds, not a single person will ask for that fancy car, or the nicer house. we will all wish for the same thing, time. time spent with loved ones and friends, time to learn and explore the world we so took for granted. to me, that's a life well lived, a life where the finite nature of time is understood, and in turn acknowledged as an invaluable asset. moreover, in week seven of moreau, it was stated that, “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week seven). not only does this reinforce the previous argument for the unimportance of materialistic items, but it also opens a new (my final) avenue of a life well-lived. the last, and what i believe to be the largest part of living a life well-lived is suffering. a life without suffering renders growth stagnant and leaves no room for perspective. it takes the rain to appreciate the sunshine in life. i believe that adversity fuels a life well lived, as it allows for people to truly find their “why”, and understand the importance of life. we have all been given such an indispensable gift, and the best way to gain understanding of that is to endure https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript lelonis 3 suffering that makes you question it. as a young man, i have already received the gift of long suffering, and i truly believe that it has shaped me into the man i am today. another immensely important component of a eulogy is determining what you want to be remembered for. one of the largest outlets of motivation that jumps out to me is providing comfort and happiness for those i love. during week five of the semester, i had an enlightening conversation with my father, who when asked about what i genuinely want in life, responded with, “i have never met someone in life with more focus on bettering the lives of those around them” (brian lelonis per week five interview moreau fye week five). recently at school, i had an epiphany. i realized that i work so hard, pushing myself and placing substantial amounts of pressure on myself to achieve highly, but not for me. everything i work toward is for the greater good in my life. i want to be remembered for giving my kids and wife a great, comfortable life. i want to be remembered for putting smiles on the faces of people i lovefriends and family. that's why i work hard. additionally, i want to be remembered for fighting adversity, failing, taking chances, suffering, because that will be the derivation of my growth. in the latter half of the semester, i learned that, “suffering is part of our lives, it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering,” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). i want to be remembered for always getting up when i fell, a man of relentless drive and perseverance. further, i want to be appreciated for my inquisitive nature, a willingness to expand my horizons, and an itch to learn. i want to be remembered for being open minded, and both appreciative and supportive of the differences of others. in the hesburgh movie, father hesburgh himself stated, “you can’t censor ideas if they disagree with your own” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). from this i learned that in order to grow you must possess a willingness to grow. nobody will gain understanding if they don't https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cmpxfuglolnnvrd3dpa8o83swcn5wb-bdifmpaxahqq/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143444 lelonis 4 search for it and place themselves in uncomfortable positions in order to find it. finally, i want to be remembered for being kind, and living in the present. memento mori was probably the most impactful concept that i learned this semester. the idea of, “intentionally thinking about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i strive to not only accept death but also embrace it, as that will allow me to diminish my worries of tomorrow and live for today. i aspire for “always lived for today” to make an appearance within my eulogy, as i want those around me to do the same. yesterday is gone, and tomorrow will never be promised, the only thing that we have with certainty is today. i never plan on wasting today, as i don't know how many “todays” i have left. the prior traits and aspirations mentioned are what i deem to be observable signs that i had a life well-lived. i plan to move forward with these lessons in all aspects of my life, continuing my growth and development as a son, friend, student, and leader. eulogies aren't written when we die, they are finished when we die, and written throughout the entirety of our lives. the future is scary, but i need to not worry, as i am the author of my eulogy. i plan on living life to the fullest, inspiring those around me to do the same, striving to achieve their rendition of a life well-lived. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html lelonis 5 integration 1 semester two mr. wood tried his best, in all things it’s quite strange for me to write this obituary in honor of evan wood. i got to know him quite well and i’m afraid i might have a skewed perception of what evan did in his life, and how he treated others, but i’ll give it my best try. that’s what evan’s mindset was at the time: give it his best try and if it doesn’t work out, that would be just okay. he wasn’t the top of the class when it came to academics, or the greatest socialite, or the wealthiest person i met–but he gave it his best try when it mattered, and for him, that effort was enough. i met evan his sophomore year at notre dame. as a fellow chemical engineer, evan was in many classes but he often forgot it, something which amused him the multiple times that he ‘found out.’ this was no malicious act, each time he tried to get to know someone was genuine. as the university president at the time, rev. john jenkins said: “[father ted] often said that the latin word for priest was pontifex, bridge builder” (“hesburgh” rev. john jenkins, c.s.c moreau fye week two). jenkins suggests that one of father ted’s greatest virtues was his ability to reach out to others with different views than his own and make meaningful connections and friendships. i believe that evan had this same ability, albeit in his own way. evan was quick to smile and even quicker to laugh at what you said. not in a malignant way, but in a way that i felt appreciated and welcome whenever i talked to him. you could tell he was engaged in a conversation when after he had finished talking, he would intently make eye-contact with a slight smile as he waited for a response. he sometimes stumbled over himself when he talked about batteries, or anime, or the book we had to read for our theology seminar. it wasn’t that he was nervous or hurried to be done with the conversation; he merely found the conversation topic interesting as well as his conversation partner. evan was satisfied with whatever came his way, both in his academics and his relationships. he was always quick to remind that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four) – he took this to heart. he wasn't painfully hurried to graduate and be 'free' from class. he also wasn't quick to close off himself from engaging in classes outside of his major. however, i knew how much of a struggle it was for him to maintain a healthy separation of his academics from his self-worth and from his mood. i would see him, every other day or so, set down his notebook, slide his feet into boots, and take a break from the emails that had buried him to go on a walk late at night with headphones. i only ever went on one with him. i remember him being quiet, but with the biggest lopsided grin i had seen on him in over a month. later he had told me he could have been grinning at a multitude of things. he could have been amused by his sudden freedom from the stressful thoughts of productivity that had captured him only moments before. he said that during his walks, he could clear away the desires that had no substance for him, the destructive and unhealthy desires such as for popularity in his social interactions or material wealth and academic distinction. i remember him loving this quote: “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” admiral richard e. byrd moreau fye week one). he loved his walks because they let him clear his mind and reflect on the things that he had enjoyed throughout the day. he was also able to let go of his stress that may have built up over his academics. then during his walks, he reflected on how he had acted throughout the day. when he had shut himself off from others with negative thoughts: “yet, we need to see others as other people! not to project on them what we would like if we were in their shoes because we are not in their shoes” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). he knew it was impossible for him to purposefully prevent negative thoughts from entering into his mental dialogue. however, he said he made a conscious effort to not entertain negative, resentful, and jealous thoughts. by letting go of these negative expectations of others, he was better able to appreciate those around him. he said on these walks that he also thought about how he was helping others. during his fall semester, he had thought that a key aspect of his spiritual life was missing. that’s why he started volunteering for our lady of the road, a catholic worker center for people who are homeless. “i began to realize that some of the movements that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for others” (“five minutes” dr. jihoon kim moreau fye week six). he also took to heart this sentiment from fr. greg boyle: “and yet, there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude. allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out.” (“tattoos on the heart” fr greg boyle moreau fye week seven). he recognized the notre dame buble that he was in and sought to reach out to the larger south bend community in an impactful way. that motivation led to his efforts with mercy works but in the future, he also hoped to expand his volunteering efforts through volunteering for the local boys and girls club and build even more connections with even more south bend residents. while his efforts weren’t on the scale of mother teresa, he did what he could with loving intentions throughout it all. i bet part of his motivation for donating his time to the south bend community could be summed up by his father’s words: “[evan] desired to bring others joy above most everything else.” (discernment conversation thomas wood moreau fye week five). hello. farewell. , our beloved friend and god’s loyal servant, has left for the heaven. we grieve for his living, but we should also be grateful for the peace, happiness, and satisfaction on his face at the very last second. he left on saturday, the sabbath. the sabbath recalls to us that, in the end, all our journeys have to bring us home (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). god compliments hard working, yet he also indicates that always hurrying up is unnecessary and wrong. david slowed down his life on the day all christians are ought to rest, and we should be thankful to god’s merci and love to him. live a well-lived life became david’s lifelong objective when he was in college. fr. hesburgh, former president of the university of notre dame and a leader in the civil rights movement, once said that: “it wasn’t how i expected to serve the country, but i was serving in my own way.” (“hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two) david realized that the core of a well-lived life is not what you do but how you do. the content does not matter as long as one live his own life and does not look back or regret. a well-lived life has an inception and also an end. at the very moment david started searching for a satisfying life, he also thought about his death. we tend to forget that there always will be an end as we try our best to enjoy the very present. however, just like a full sentence must come with an ending punctuation, it is death that makes a life complete and one’s time limited. sister alethia, a nun spent years emphasizing the significance of remembering death once said that “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). always remembering that life is short helped david avoid wasting time, and eventually received happiness. david graduated from notre dame with a degree in business and became a business consultant soon after graduate. you might know that his original goal was to stay in this industry and earn him and his family a fantastic living. but career is a developmental process that will recur throughout one’s lifetime and one will move between stages as one learn and grow (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). life is full of possibilities. after working in consulting for 8 years, david set up a social enterprise in the tibetan area to design creative and eco-friendly tourism based on tibet's culture and environment. david’s family funded a tibetan orphan for decades and doing something for tibetans had always been his hope. the organization was quite a success, but its earnings were certainly minor compared to a consulting group. however, a life in rural area was quite relaxing for david, and he once said that “there should be a spiritual tie between me and this people.” it took him twenty years to make this organization truly influential and beneficial to the entire tibetan area. at the age of fifty, david turned to the area of sustainability and aimed to contribute to build a better future for future generations. he focused on renewable energies with a concentration in solar panels. the cheap and convenient products were welcomed by a lot of chinese families. no one can have a completely smooth life, so does david. he encountered many difficulties when trying to build a bridge between china and the united states. the competitions and even conflicts between the two powers made it difficult for him to travel and invite experts to participate in his projects. his cultural identity could also be awkward should turbulent times happen. but david knew that why questions trap us in our past while what questions help us create a better future (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). he managed to mitigate negative influences coming from the political level, using his pertinence and sincere. nongovernmental communications were held frequently, and academic discussions in the realm of sustainability continued. starting from notre dame’s huge alumina group, david expanded his network in both countries and enlarged the voice of peace and friendliness. “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven) one of the shiniest parts of david’s life is his connections to all people he met. he treated everyone equally with innate kindness and sympathy. from janitors to ceos, he enjoyed talking with anyone and could learn from any conversation he had. as a cultural minority, he was welcomed in college and beyond. he maintained fantastically good relationships with fellas from his college dorm and companies he worked for. most importantly, he had a super lovely family. david’s parents enjoyed longevity, and his wife brought him a boy and a girl. he loved them so much and so did them. today, we gather here to bade farewell to our beloved , who lives deeply in our heart. no tear is needed, and smiles are essential to welcome his soul into our father’s hug. integration iii spring 2022 giorgi kharchilava professor wagner moreau fys spring 2022 4 march 2022 the conundrum of a fulfilling life well, i’m not exactly sure how to write this. no one has ever had to write their own eulogy; i don’t think anyone’s ever been self-knowledgeable enough to do it, especially not an 18-year old kid who doesn’t even know the cause of his death. but i’ll try. i think i kind of have a handle on the person i am (or was), and hopefully i’ve at least thought about my principles enough to put together something coherent. so here it goes, the eulogy for giorgi avtandyl kharchilava, son of avtandyl irodion kharchilava and ia tamaz iashvili. firstly, let me note that i am writing this eulogy as if my life lasted only as long as it has until this point. i’m not doing this to be gruesome or depressing but rather because i have no clue what my life will look like in even a few years, let alone decades down the line. giorgi kharchilava, though his life was short, lived a quite fulfilling life. he loved a lot of people, and he liked to spread himself wide; put his fingers in many different pies, if you will. though his death would never have been stress-induced, this doesn’t mean he lived life stress-free. the idea of large tasks often daunted him, and he was never the best at managing time. if he could say one thing about how he wished his life had gone differently, he would have said the following: “i wish i could have set my mind to one thing where i knew that i put in my complete effort; that i simply could not have done it better.” he always felt that he scrambled to complete everything at the last minute, and that his talents carried him to success even though they shouldn’t have. perhaps he would’ve managed time better if he had learned of the benefits mailto:gkharchi@nd.edu of mindfulness. just one hour per day to decompress and think about nothing might have made the other 23 hours more productive, and therefore him more productive as a whole. as pico iyer put it in “why we need to slow down our lives,”: “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down.” (iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives”, moreau fye week 1)here, iyer speaks of the fortune 500 and tech ceos. the leaders of these companies that have helped create an information superflood in the modern age realize that taking a break from said flood can make your relationship with it more productive, if not more fulfilling. perhaps if gio had seen this virtue he would have gone to sleep less at 3 am, and not shown up to his meeting with his moreau professor essentially half asleep (apparently, after the meeting he went back to his room and slept until 2:30 pm). life can be unforgiving in this regard sometimes. if you don’t have a good plan, it can hurt you. however, sometimes the opposite is the case: life will give you a better plan than you could have ever thought of. take the case of the late great father theodore hesburgh, the best president in notre dame’s history. his life is a fascinating study of the intersection of fate and steadfastness. said he, on teaching returning soldiers from wwii instead of being a military chaplain as he had hoped, “it wasn’t how i was expecting to serve my country, but i was serving it my own way.” (hesburgh, moreau fye week 2) hesburgh’s commitment to teaching and students led him to a very unexpected spot: the presidency of notre dame. but, he took this opportunity with unbelievable vigor and intelligence. he had not chosen exactly to be president, but having been president, he chose to do it to the best of his ability. in all fairness, maybe gio never did things to that extent, but he does deserve credit in some regard. he was a pianist, and used his talents to accompany fellow notre dame students and even put on a full-length piano https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 recital for the people of the university, an event he hopes to repeat in the coming years. before notre dame, he frequently gave free concerts in retirement homes and even livestreamed a few during the covid pandemic. you can see pretty clearly to this point, even without discussing his specific morals, that gio is a bit of a pessimist at times. he knows that he is notable, exciting, talented, smart, and capable. however, like his parents and those around him, he often chooses to downplay this in the hope of getting better. maybe this was helpful to him in life. indeed, st. augustin famously quipped “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing…indeed it’s the best thing about us.” (three key questions, michael hines, moreau fye week 3) but even this, then, should harbor a positive realization. yes, gio was restless and self-deprecating at times, and this might have made him a better human being. so there, he might have got something right in his life. hooray! so, what were gio’s plans in life? what did he want to do? gio loved the phenomena that describe the universe. faith and god remain a mystery to him as he passes on, but his main goal in life was to master and help drive forward our understanding of one of the most fundamental subjects: physics. he was a physics major, and though it was hard (especially the stupid labs), he went to bed every night fascinated with the process of problem-solving. even if he never found that great research question or methodology that would’ve helped him change the world, the root cause of his love for physics – the yearn to solve problems – will be with him always, and can last through many hardships. as the center for career development says, “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” (“navigating your career journey,” center for career development, moreau fye week 4) https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ gio, clearly, lived his life very introspectively. he always assumed that this was a good thing, something that made him a better person. however, this is not always the case. psychologist tasha eurich writes: “however, grant and others have also come to realize there’s no relationship between introspection and insight. this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” (tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective”, moreau fye week 5) it’s important to be honest with yourself when introspective; sometimes gio would rush to any answer his brain could provide, when in reality the solutions to his problems ran much deeper and were much more complex. but most importantly, gio lived his life to be with others. he loved talking to people, getting to know their stories, and sharing his own with them. he knew that every good thing about him was a credit to the fabulous mentors he had in his life, and he hoped to pay the wonderful treatment he was given as a kid to as many people as possible. gio always tried to live by a motto similar to what pope francis said: “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others. life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” (pope francis, why the only future worth building includes everyone, moreau fye week 7) at the end of the day, that’s the essence of gio’s life. every time he helped a fellow student with their homework when he didn’t have to, every time he gave free piano concerts both organized and informal, every time he sang in a choir or a musical, he did it for the people he was surrounding himself with. he did it because he loved and cherished his relationships, and his appreciation and love for those around him will hopefully never die. https://libres.uncg.edu/ir/uncg/f/p_silvia_evaluating_2011.pdf https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration capstone integration april 23, 2022 moreau capstone good. what is “good”? to whom or what does “good” apply? what is living a “good” life? can “good” be objective, or is it forever subjective in the eyes of the beholder? “i want to change the lives of others, not in crazy ways, but in the sense that their day was better because i interacted with them” (santiago, 2022). during the first half of the semester, i journeyed to find my conviction. after much thought and realizations, i determined that my one true conviction, although there are probably many others that are still unknown to me, is that i want to be a force for good. for me, “good” can be applied to many things. i can do my best to live a good life. i can try to make others have a good life. i can do good things and make the world better. for me, “good” is benefit. benefit to myself, others, and society as a whole. that is what good is to me. good. how do i do good? is doing good simply just following the law and trying to be a “good” person? sometimes. but at the core, i believe that one cannot simply just do good, for actions in itself are not worth as much if they are not driven by a cause. for me, that cause is my purpose. therefore, this leads me to wonder, what is my purpose? as i did in my last journey towards discovering my conviction, i once again practice introspection. when discussing introspection in her article, tasha eurich quotes psychologist, anthony m. grant, saying, “…people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness…” (eurich, 2017). like in my journey towards discovering my conviction, it is also essential for me to have greater insight into myself in order to discover my purpose. while reflecting and gaining more insight into myself, i came to the realization that my purpose is not so much different than my conviction. this is where i was confusing myself. my conviction is not simply my mission statement or some action that i strife to achieve. my conviction is built into my purpose, for a conviction cannot really be a conviction if it is not rooted in a purpose. for conviction is a deep rooted belief and our beliefs come from our purpose in life. all human beings share the same purpose. that purpose is to serve god and to serve others. and how do i accomplish this? i must strive to be the best version of myself every day. the “best version of myself”. that sounds awfully cliche. but if we manage to look past that, it brings up the question? what really is becoming the best version of yourself and how does one go about achieving that? is it possible? will we know if we achieved it? i think the answers to these questions differ from person to person, but what i do know is that for me, i can learn about the best version of myself through gaining wisdom. wisdom from listening to the experiences and advice of others. wisdom from observing the world around me. wisdom from reflecting about myself. as paul blashcko puts it, we should all “pursue truth” (blaschko, 2022), and although professor blashcko turns to philosophy to do this, i believe that i can do this simply through observation and word of mouth. through gaining wisdom from others, i can learn what makes up an ideal person, and then i can try to strive to be like that person. one of the main sources of wisdom that i turn to is the bible, for who is a better example of an ideal person than jesus himself? by asking myself, “what would jesus do?”, i am able to try and be the best version of myself every single day. it is difficult to truly help others if we are not first situated with ourselves. this is why it is essential to try to be the best version of ourselves in order to help others. this finally comes back to my main goal. how do i become a force for good? what actions should i take, now that i know what those actions are rooted in? i can be a force for good by leading by example. i feel like i am called to try to make a difference by showing others how to act. actions speak louder than words and it is necessary for people to see an example of how to act, for in today’s world, many people are so easily taught things just by observation. in his speech to west point cadets, william deresiewicz said, “so what i saw around me were great kids who had been trained to be world-class hoop jumpers” (deresiewicz, 2010). today, many kids are great “hoop jumpers” because they see everyone else doing the same thing. we learn by example, and i can be a force for good by leading by example. one of the ways that i can lead by example is by showing empathy to others. today;s world is so self-centered and career-centered that we forget about others. we forget that everyone is going through something. we forget to care about the feelings of others, and on top of that, we do not do anything to help. that needs to change. in her speech, louise richardson quotes atticus finch, saying, “...to see the world from another’s perspective is a critical life skill” (richardson, 2018). in order to lead by example, i must be able to have empathy for others and understand what they are feeling, so that i can help relieve some stress or pain. overall, moreau has taught me about my convictions, my purpose, and my goals on how to act, and how all of these things are related. all of these aspects in my life lead towards one thing. transcendence. in the end, everyone is journeying towards transcendence. we all strive to be enlightened. we all want the truth. we all want that ultimate fulfillment. and that fulfillment, that rewards, that truth, that goal of transcendence is what we work for here at notre dame, in our future careers, and in our lives. integration three integration three defining a life well-lived: embracing the present, making a difference, and cultivating meaningful relationships death is often viewed as a time of sadness and sorrow, but this shouldn’t be the case. in the words of sister theresa aletheia noble, “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week three). death should not be something to be avoided, rather it presents an opportunity to reflect on and celebrate a life well-lived. to me, a life well-lived is one that is lived in the moment, involves doing your part to make the world a better place, and allows you to surround yourself with meaningful relationships. a significant amount of our course content from this semester so far has dealt with reflection and living in the moment, which is an essential part of the way i view a life well-lived. to again reference sister alethia, she seeks to practice the phrase “memento mori”, which means, “remember your death”, and the purpose of this is to “think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future,” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week three). this concept serves as a powerful reminder that death is inevitable. there is nothing we can do to avoid dying and preoccupying ourselves with worry about our impending death is useless. instead, we can use this knowledge to help us to live better in the moment. by keeping our death in mind, we are aware of the fact that we only have a limited amount of time left, and with time always running out, a life well-lived means always embracing the current moment. part of this idea of living in the moment involves taking a step back. according to pico iyer, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture,” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). especially because of how busy i am now trying to balance academics, participate in different activities, and still get enough sleep, it can be easy to get lost in everything that’s going on. i often find myself always looking ahead to what will be going on next week and the week after that, and while this is useful when it comes to being organized and having good time management, it can also prevent me from focusing on today. if i’m always anticipating what will come next, how can i embrace the present moment? one of the provided mindfulness resources was an article, and one of the phrases that the author used was, “when chopping onions, just chop onions,” (3 ways to practice everyday mindfulness by krista steele moreau fye week six). what she means by this is to focus your attention on what you’re doing instead of thinking about that homework assignment or that upcoming exam. this skill is one that i associate with a life well-lived. someone that lives well is someone that lives in the present and makes the most of the current moment. in my own life, i’d like to implement more mindfulness strategies to work towards this skill. currently, i find that going on walks can help me to destress and take my focus away from everything i have to do, but in order to continue to foster personal growth, i would like to try more practices, whether that https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/prayer/ways-to-practice-everyday-mindfulness/ means meditation, prayer, breathing exercises, or something else. being able to focus on the present, with the knowledge that our time is limited, is essential to a life well-lived. in addition to living in the moment, part of my definition of a life well-lived involves having a rewarding career that allows you to find happiness while also doing good for others. in any case, a person’s career is likely a significant part of their life, but for a life to be well-lived, that career should correspond to the following three questions, posed by the center for career development: what brings you joy? what are you good at? what does the world need you to be? (navigating your career journey by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). all three of these questions are important to a life well-lived because they ensure that you’re spending your life doing something that you enjoy, that your strengths apply to, and that benefits others. personally, i’m not quite sure what i want my career to look like yet, but i have an idea in mind. i know that i want to be an engineer because i love problem-solving, my skills in math and science will allow me to be successful, and my knowledge would give me the ability to implement solutions that help others. my conversation with my parents as a part of the week 5 discernment activity provided some reassurance that this is the right path for me. they’ve noticed how much i enjoy my stem classes and agreed that engineering seems to be the right choice. in order to ensure that my career leads me toward a life well-lived, i plan on taking advantage of the resources available to me, whether that means interacting with the center for career development, connecting with alumni, or just doing my own research. whatever my career ends up looking like, as long as i can be happy while also contributing to something bigger than myself, i’ll be living a life well-lived. finally, arguably the most important part of what a life well-lived means to me is being able to forge meaningful relationships with those around you. in fr. boyle’s tattoos on the heart, he mentions that when we refrain from judgment, “we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love,” (chapter 8: jurisdiction by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). this was something that resonated with me personally because i can sometimes be judgmental, so i was reminded that if i stay open-minded, i may have the chance to form an unexpected friendship. in order to continue to grow in a social sphere and keep widening my network to expand my relationships, i plan to try to step outside of my comfort zone and be willing to be vulnerable in an attempt to meet new people. surrounding yourself with others that want to be around you is key to a life well-lived. during class when the assignment was to draw a picture of what a life well-lived means to you, i sketched one person surrounded by a bunch of other people. if other people want to be around you, i view that as a sign that you’ve done something right. an important step in the quest to live a life well-lived is having inspirations and examples to follow. one such example is the life of fr. hesburgh. he was able to accomplish so much and influence so many people during his life. his work went far beyond notre dame and had a profound impact on the entire country and even the world in terms of civil rights, catholic education, and most importantly as a leader with the ability to connect people regardless of their differences (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). although the average person will likely never achieve as much as he did, fr. hesburgh’s mission to always do what’s right is something that anyone can incorporate into their own attempt at a life well-lived. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 overall, my three pillars of a life well-lived are living in the moment, pursuing a professional life that brings personal joy and benefits others, and forming meaningful relationships with those around you. in order to continue to foster my own personal growth in working towards these tenets, i plan on making time for reflection and mindfulness techniques, taking advantage of all the resources available when it comes to career planning, continuing to make an effort to meet new people, and also trying to integrate the commendable characteristics of fr. hesburgh’s life into my own. when i die, i can only hope that the people i leave behind will be able to look back on my life and view it as a life well-lived. caterina calderon capstone integration moreau fye for the past 19 years of my life, i have always tried to make decisions that will lead to me live a life well lived. these decisions might mean going to college away from home so that i can explore my opportunities, always listening to my friends when they need my help, praising god, being kind, amongst many other things. nonetheless, i have never quite landed on what it actually means to live a life well-lived. some have argued that a life well lived mean fulfilling your purpose and working towards this every single day, and i agree. yet, what is this purpose that people talk about? after a year of being a freshman and attempting to figure out what i want to do with my life, i have landed on the conclusion that my lives’ purpose is to give back to the communities that have shaped me into who i am today. i must use the blessing and opportunities that have been granted to me to help those less fortunate, to help my friends and family find their way, and to always try to be someone who is always there for those who need it. being at notre dame has made achieving this idea of myself much easier, since after all, the school appreciates "for the great achievements of human beings, but also a disciplined sensibility to the poverty, injustice, and oppression that burden the lives of so many”  ( university of notre dame mission statement, by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 13 ). reaching this conclusion was not easy; to figure this out, i had to go through a journey of self-discovery. it was not easy to go down this journey of self-discovery, but my first step was to take a good, hard look at the life i was living. as we learned in our moreau class, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). as we analyze ourselves, we take a step back and see the bigger scope of the life we are living and how we need to continue carrying on. by breathing for a moment and really seeing everything that is going on around us, we can identify what it is that we need to change or better about ourselves to fix the things in our life that we are not comfortable with. for me, this meant seeing the role that my family and friends play in my life. as we discussed in week 7, humans are very communal and social beings. without the people around me, i would not be who i am today. treasuring them and supporting them in everything they do is what allows me to continue to have flourishing relationships with them. juts like the pope said; " many of us nowadays seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve" … "the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters because life flows through relations with others", and this is truly something i believe. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). building our future means doing it by the side of the people who have always been there for us. without my friends, i would not be the person i am today. for them, i am eternally grateful. your friends can also be the ones to help you find the purpose in your life. i had a conversation with my friend sofia once, and she mentioned that after seeing me every day for the past year, she had come to conclude that one of my biggest life goals was finding happiness. no matter where this happiness was going to be found, my purpose was to do so. she guided me to see the bigger picture of who i am as i identify myself in this crazy world. (moreau fye_week five_discernment conversation activity_sp22, by university of notre damemoreau fye week 5). another important thing i learned this semester that is essential to remember is “memento mori” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). it is such a simple phrase yet after reading the article i was struck by its importance. we must always be aware that life is short. we will all die. our time is limited, so what we do with it must be important. by staying aware that our time is short, we stay aware that we must do something with it. by not letting opportunities pass us by and turn into past memories, we are embracing this life and making the most out of it. don’t be afraid to say yes because you fear failure. be courageous, stand up to people, take the chance you were not going to take. in the movie about father hesburgh, he expresses a similar message, the following conversation occurs "everybody in the world wants the president to be the speaker "how are you going to get?", well, she said, you'll never know if you don't try"... "we promptly got back to acceptances" (hesburgh (30:00)., by patrick creadon moreau fye week 2) he expresses the importance of at least trying, putting yourself out there, before you shoot down your chances. look at how he never gave up on his dream; today, he is one of the biggest figures in notre dame history. he inspires me to take advantage of the place where i am today and making sure that all of my efforts go into achieving my dreams, no matter what they are. the article we read for week 4 stated "if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life." (navigating your career journey, by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 4). i am dedicated to becoming the best version of the person i am, so i will take the tools to achieve this, take all the chances necessary, and face fear up front without a doubt. one of the biggest obstacles that stand before taking the chances to become the best version of yourself is the possibility of suffering. human beings fear suffering in such a way, that they would rather never be happy than risk a chance of pain. yet, i do not believe that this fulfills the idea of a life well-lived; a life without suffering is not a complete life. in the video '5 minutes' suffering is the main topic discussed, in the video, dr. kim says "i concluded that god is good and god loves us but at the same time the purpose of my life is not is not simply about overcoming suffering, suffering is a part of our lives"(5 minutes, by grotto moreau fye week 6). pain is what makes us evolve; it teaches us about the hardships of life and allows us to build a character strong enough to beat down any obstacles that may come our way. also, if we never felt sad, we would also never feel joy; these emotions complement each other, they build alongside each other, and they characterize the people that we become in life. besides, this is the reason why have people besides us, so they can support us, and we can support them whenever the going gets tough. after all, “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” ​​(“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9) . in moments of pain, connections between people grow stronger and more cherished, binding them together and helping them find meaning to the dark times. fear is also one of the biggest factors that stop people from fulfilling their purpose and turning against each other. fear comes creeping in, and it tears people apart, as they are afraid to show their true colors and bring people into the lives they have created. as martin luther king mentioned, “men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something, dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12 -). society has reached that point where we separate ourselves from other people simply because we feel that we are supposed to be different, and this is what causes all of the divisions that exist in our world. discriminatory behaviors are passed down from generation to generation and this is what does not allow us to move forward and stop all of it. this was talked about in week 10 of our moreau and a quote that illustrates it is “although racism does of course occur in individual acts, these acts are part of a larger system that we all participate in."(why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism, by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10 ). it is up to us, the new generations, to break these old patterns and unite people of all color, race, ethnicity, and make up our new community. as the new generation, we have also changed the way that people express their opinions and call out the things they feel are wrong about the world. as mentioned in the video watched in week 11: “some people probably would agree that, yeah, you know, being on twitter all the time or sharing a meme about some silly news story is entertainment. but the feelings that they bring to politics are much deeper. they care, and they feel hurt that politics isn’t going the way they want it. and they feel joy when politics does go the way they want it”. (how to avoid an echo chamber, by thinknd moreau fye week 11). this quote makes me understand how everyone that gets involved in politics in one way or another finds comfort in expressing their political views and getting involved in current events by using either humor or media. i usually do this; i do not like to get involved in politics firsthand, but i do try to share my views and try to spread awareness about ongoing situations in things such as memes or posts. this way, i feel like i said my piece, but in a way that does not receive a lot of backlash or opinions. i am now continuing to try and express who i am using all of the tools i have been given, such as social media. since this is the new way to let people know what you think, i feel that by using it correctly and for positive impact, i am able to be good and use it for good. my mission in life is to put in all of my efforts into always being as kind as possible to the people around me, staying true to myself, and finding my happiness with the people i have around me. by always using my tools to face a challenge face on, gathering support from my friends, and motivating those around me to strive for kindness and for the best, i am able to fulfill the purpose i was placed on this earth to do. i am certain that my time at notre dame will only contribute to helping shape me into this version of myself. i am so grateful for the year i have had, and hope that the next three are just as amazing. integration 3 matthew kavanaugh 3/3/22 moreau fye integration 3 eulogy for matthew ryan kavanaugh we gather here today in remembrance of our fallen brother matthew ryan kavanaugh. i will do my best to encapsulate the type of man he was in the short period of time that i have. first things first, you can’t talk about matthew without bringing up his faith. a man of god, he evolved as a catholic as his life went on. having attended a catholic grade school, values of faith and virtue were instilled in him from the time he was young. he went to a public high school, but was able to continue to grow in his spiritual life through being a part of youth groups and attending church weekly. it was not until he got to notre dame in which he was able to take a big leap in becoming closer to god. one of his role models early on was father ted hesburgh, president of notre dame in the mid to late 1900s. “when thinking about father ted, you cannot talk about him or any of the decisions he made without talking about his faith.” this quote by reverend austin collins, c.s.c. in “hesburgh” explains to us why father hesburgh’s faith was so instrumental in dictating his actions. like father hesburgh, because matthew’s faith was the basis of everything he did, his actions reflected the work of god and what we are called to accomplish on earth. god instructs us to be a good person and to help those around us. in order to live a life well-lived, in matthew’s mind, that is what he needed to do ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). matthew’s faith dictated his actions, and he allowed it to mold him throughout his life. notre dame made matthew who he was, and he learned how to become the person he was throughout his time in college. “after you leave nd, some of the details (like choosing a major) will change, but the core elements remain the same: learn about yourself, explore careers, reflect, & take action.” matthew deeply involved himself in the worlds of science and business, and he developed study habits which https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 formed him into the professional he was in the healthcare management field. we have to take a strategic approach to ensuring our future. we must learn about ourselves, explore different careers, and reflect on what we want to do most in our lives. building these thinking habits in college will best prepare us for when we want to start a career. we all need to use matthew as an example ("navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course" by notre dame center for career development moreau fye week four). one of the most important things to matthew’s life, and the thing i try to replicate the most, was his ability to self-reflect and meditate. “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future.” this quote by tasha eurich in “the right way to be introspective (yes there’s a wrong way)” illustrates to us a beneficial way to reflect. instead of asking himself why certain things in his life were happening, matthew never played the victim card and always had a positive outlook on things. he learned to manage his emotions and therefore, was a better person because of it. like matthew, i will start reflecting on what my feelings really are. it is then when i will become more self-aware and will be better able to manage my emotions ("the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). the benefits of meditation, in which matthew would want me to rave on and on about, are incomparable to any form of self-reflection. “it's been found by scientists that meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains.” this quote by pico iyer in “why we need to slow down our lives” encourages us to instill meditation into our daily lives. iyer explains the benefits of meditation and how we as humans far too often omit meditation and reflection in our lives today. matthew always made time for meditation, and i really believe he was always in a good place mentally because of it ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ another big thing matthew relied on heavily was his family and friends. always all over the place with what he wanted to do in life, he didn’t settle on what he really wanted until he talked to those close to him. “to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.). the fostering of a community of friends who can be honest with us and whom we can genuinely hear, before whom and with whom we can be open and humble.” this quote by father michael himes in his piece “three key questions” explains to us a key point in discerning what we want to accomplish in our life, and that is that we need to surround ourselves with people who will encourage us and who will be honest with us in telling us what we are good at. one of my favorite stories from matthew’s high school experience was when he almost didn’t play football because he thought he was too small. it wasn’t until his friends encouraged him to play that he joined the team and became a team captain senior year. as he always told me, you will become who you surround yourself with ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). sometimes taking too much time for school, it wasn’t until he met his best friend in college, braden, that he realized he needed to dedicate more time to those around him. braden noticed matthew was too focused on school that he neglected the people around him. a friend saying something to him was all he needed to change what he was doing and to make an effort to get closer to his new college friends (discernment reflection moreau fye week 5). matthew always would talk about how important relationships became to him after this point, and i can’t think of anyone who made more time for others than matthew. “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” this quote by pope francis in “why the only future worth building includes everyone” explains how relationships and interactions are imperative to a meaningful life. the relationships we make throughout our lives help shape us as a person and what we stand for as an individual. like matthew, we need role models to look up to and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40377/files/467818?module_item_id=143396 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ch0gs1qnt_r-c9nqwubvssuj6ddqaprfyerczzjukh8/edit?usp=sharing emulate, while we can also be influential figures to others that may look up to us. ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francismoreau fye week seven) as we look back on the life of matthew ryan kavanaugh, let us not mourn the loss of having him in each of our lives. rather, as he would want us, let us reflect a piece of matthew in each of our daily lives as we strive to make a positive impact on those around us. it is then when we will be able to say that we lived a life well-lived. thank you and god bless. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau integration 2 leathers the power of introspection: a preparation for the future as the famous philosopher, socrates once said, “a life unexamined is not worth living.” i believe to every notre dame student, including myself, these words ring true. the examination of my own life is where i find personal growth that ultimately will fulfill my purpose on earth. to be introspective is to grow through different encounters with good and evil, justice and injustice, to build a response for the future in light of what i have learned through this class. this is the goal of the moreau first-year experience. to tackle the more significant questions of personal development, one must have confidence. it is not always an easy thing to ask yourself difficult questions about your experiences. often i lie awake at night contemplating the previous twelve hours of my day. a frequent question that i used to encounter in my day-day life before and during my time at notre dame was, “should i be here? am i enough?” these questions are related to the mental “disease” imposter syndrome. imposter syndrome is when an individual questions their right to be participating in an activity or a part of their life. just being able to put a name on this feeling of deep questioning of my value helped start my healing process. this was true for many others that suffer from the same problems (“what is imposter syndrome” by elizebeth cox– moreau fye week 9). my worst feelings of imposter syndrome started before my arrival on campus. i initially hesitated to accept my enrollment offer for the university out of fear i would under-perform here. eventually, i conformed to pressure i set on myself to chase the best education possible. as my parents drove me across the country on the final days of summer to notre dame, i honestly felt like a lamb going to the slaughter. i felt more fear in the anticipation for the first week of classes than i did ever going to school in my life. the single most significant thing that helped quell these fears was an email i received from the university explaining imposter syndrome and telling us not to be discouraged if we stumble. it put a name to my feelings and gave a talking point both my roommate and i could discuss. i quickly found out he felt the same way, and many others in my dorm felt they also didn’t belong. i now find that notre dame significantly challenges everyone, but we have the tools necessary to succeed. i do belong here, and i can succeed. another important lesson i learned in my first semester at notre dame was you do not know your limits until you test them. my calculus professor always reminds us of this in the mathematical sense, as some limits (a mathematical way to estimate numbers) seem solvable with shortcuts. still, in reality, they are much more nuanced. i thought i knew my capabilities, but as it turns out, i drastically underestimated myself. my fear of notre dame was so out of touch with reality. how is it possible to fear something and believe that you won’t succeed without trying? conquering imposter syndrome was my first step to build confidence in myself and learn that sometimes the best thing for myself is a leap of faith headfirst into the unknown. another crucial personal development i encountered this semester was the importance of community. pre-notre dame, i was no stranger to the community. i played sports and was involved with many different organizations that built a sense of community in my life. this aspect of my life was something i rarely reflected on. within my relocation to northern indiana, i realized that communities were something i took for granted. as time has passed, i feel that i am flourishing within the different on-campus communities i have found. not only that, but the communities i have found here are arguably stronger than any i had at home, which proves parker palmer’s point that “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker palmer– moreau fye week 11). he explains in his article that communities that are sought after, not created, are the strongest. at home, all of my communities were beneficial but ultimately created for purposes other than sharing experiences. the importance of a real community that throws people from all walks of life together cannot be understated. my future will inevitably be wrapped up within multiple different communities. different values and beliefs will often clash within these communities, as is seen inside of any normal community. in week 10, i learned the dangers of conviction. fr. john jenkins stated, “conviction, however, is not all good.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by fr. john jenkins– moreau fye week 10). conviction, passion, and willpower are all positive things that can change communities for the better– and i foresee myself using these to change my future communities for the better. i also see my peers at notre dame filled with all of these qualities because they are pursuing extra-education at a challenging school. but, as father pete addresses, the problem that is not considered enough today is how blinding these forces are. we can be so caught up in the want to change our world for the good that we may not recognize other options that can make our goals more accessible. this is something i have never thought of before. i felt that having conviction about my beliefs was fundamental to having roots in something. i learned it is ok to challenge these beliefs, and frequently other ways of change can be more effective than the ones we seek. throughout all of these different experiences mentioned above, there is one essential tool that i failed to mention–hope. i have learned that hope can be practiced. it is simply a mindset that one goes to when entering the “troughs” in their life. in c.s. lewis’s mind, “...the troughs provide opportunities to our side also.” (“the screwtape letters” c.s. lewis–moreau fye week 12). “our side” is a reference to hell, or less literally the evils of the world. lewis's final paragraph hints to his nephew that humans are most vulnerable to corruption when they enter their “troughs” (lows in our lives). my personal development has stemmed from hard, uncomfortable experiences, and i know the future will not be any different. having and practicing hope is the ultimate tool to conquer these things. this semester of the moreau first-year experience has taught me many things. ultimately, it has taught me to be introspective and realize where my values and personal development come from. week 9-12 all allowed me to do this through different lights, from understanding imposter syndrome, the power of community, the dangers of conviction, and hope. all different things, but very interconnected in my life. i do not fear the future, as i am well equipped to handle any problem thrown my way through these experiences learned in such a short period of time. capstone integration moreau fye 10102 29 april 2022 finding guidance from my mission as a first-year student at the university of notre dame, i had high expectations for myself and a vision for the rest of my college career. to me, a well-lived life is one where i focus on being the best person i can be and using my gifts to better serve others (integration three – moreau fye week eight). while looking into the future is necessary in this world, i realized it was equally important to continue to stay grounded in the present through my values. pursuing a life well-lived was a question i continually faced this year while trying to find my way through the transition of college and reminding myself of what i truly value in life helped me. my mission statement encapsulates what is important to me and how i live my life: i value my family, friends, and the community that is built when i put energy into each of these relationships. having a community allows me to have meaningful relationships with others. religion is very valued in my life and being in a community not only helps me to grow in my faith, but helps others realize their calling. helping others is a way that i can build relationships outside of my community and show the importance of close relationships and loyalty. we are all human and deserve the same respect, and i understand that at the end of the day i am building relationships. if there is no foundation of trust and order, it will be hard to create community and relationships with others. i value a lot of things in my life, but they all revolve around my relationships with others, whether it’s friends, family, or even competitors, and finding a sense of community (mission statement – moreau fye week thirteen). https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing for me, the people i surround myself with is a step in the direction of a life well-lived. they affect you in ways that could either be beneficial to your future or detrimental. i value authenticity from myself and others because it shows that they are solid in their values (“week five discernment conversation activity” -moreau week five). i want to find friends who bring out my best self so i can be in a position to pursue a life well-lived. in order to develop these relationships, i have plugged myself into clubs and activities that i enjoy, to find people with whom i share a lot in common. for example, club golf has been important for me because i have found a community with a shared interest with opportunities to meet people and form relationships. not only is it important to seek out communities but being the facilitator and nurturer of a community is also key in developing relationships. getting involved with hall council and gaining a leadership role is a way to facilitate community. as a first year i know what it feels like to be sort of dumped into the middle of a community that already is formed, but it is the job of a leader of the hall to create a new community around the new students: “there needs to be listening as well as advice, addressing and strategizing how to overcome obstacles, confronting setbacks, and at times even prods and cajoles, with the hope and the expectation that the relationship will not be static” (“teaching accompaniment: a journey together” by reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). empathy is what is needed for communities to prosper because we can build relationships on common ground. all the upperclassmen were once freshmen excited and nervous to start a new chapter in their life, so they will be able to guide the first-year students with advice and being there for them when there is a problem: “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“constitutions of the congregation of https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146535 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146535 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146579 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146614 holy cross” by congregation of holy cross – moreau fye week twelve). recognizing that we are all human is the basis for forming relationships. to me, relationships are important as i pursue a life well-lived. having someone there to guide you and most times, just being there by your side, accompanying you can make a world of difference in your life: “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). they bring out your best self, and that in turn helps you to see more clearly how you want to live your life and how you are going to start living. this is not always easy to do, to develop relationships with others. it takes a lot of time and effort from both people because a relationship is not a one-way street, it is a two-way street. but, even with effort being put into the relationship, there will be times when it can get hard and like things will not improve. however, “it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow” (“navigating your career journey” -ccd – moreau fye week four). acknowledging that things are not going to go perfectly smoothly is crucial to living a life well-lived. if you focus on being perfect all the time, it will lead to frustration and unhappiness, ultimately discouraging you to live a life well-lived. as a first year, it is a tough transition to college because you must learn how to balance your social life with academics. personally, when my anxiety ramps up, usually from a big change in my life, i bury myself in work and forget to nurture my relationships with others. this is not how i want to live my life because it goes against my values of finding community. so, even though it is difficult to pursue a life well-lived when my anxiety increases, reminding https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146614 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ myself of what i value is crucial to get myself out of the bad habit of working too much. and actually enacting on my values of finding community and developing relationships away from my anxiety driven work helps: “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by iyer – moreau fye week one). work may be important to some people in their life, and it is important for me in a sense that i can use my education as a force for good in the world. but there needs to be a healthy balance, so i do not burn out. another way that focusing on developing relationships can be tough is when we lean into our biases, letting them dictate who we choose to connect with. especially at notre dame where the majority of the students are white, wealthy catholics it can be difficult to make yourself branch out from this group to find other people. to be able to challenge your bias towards a certain group will lead to more relationships that may not have had the opportunity to develop had you stayed in your comfort zone. this is difficult to do, no doubt, but we have to do better in accepting that, as a white person, we have privilege: “it became clear over time that white people have extremely low thresholds for enduring any discomfort associated with challenges to our racial worldviews.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by diangelo – moreau fye week ten). this privilege gets in the way of forming relationships that have the power to change your life. if you really want to pursue a life well-lived, then getting rid of biases will help. while we all have biases, we can choose to surround ourselves with people who share your biases, or we can step outside our comfort zone to really try and challenge ourselves in getting rid of a potentially harmful bias. social media poses a threat to having constructive dialogue with people who disagree with you, and ultimately a threat to living out my mission of fostering community. there are definitely aspects of social media that have created community, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146592 but there are also aspects that have created a dangerous “community” of people who share biases and will not listen to those who disagree with them: “they will learn a lot of facts and talk about those facts. they will participate in a kind of craft. they’ll go online and share memes, have a discussion, very similar to how sports fans listen to sports radio” (“passion isn’t enough” by hersh – moreau fye week eleven). it is truly a craft and not a true dialogue to help challenge any biases. if i am to pursue a life well-lived, i must be fine with making myself uncomfortable and actually listening to others’ perspectives. this way i can form meaningful relationships with people who also care about getting the truth right. these can make living out my mission difficult, but i can always remind myself of my mission so i can continue living it out. reminding myself of my mission grounds me in a life i know i want to pursue and live. to ground myself, i need to take time to remind myself of my values and when i do that, i know that i am on the right track to pursuing a life well-lived: “remember the roots you grew up with, not lose sight of yourself as you’re presented with the many challenges life has to offer, and keeping a tight grip on your values which can help lead you to the people that will help you be the person you want to be” (“domer dozen”-hillmer – moreau fye week two). being able to recognize when i need to ground myself is a skill that takes time because it can become such a habit to bury yourself in work instead of addressing the problem. doing something that you enjoy will help you avoid burnout and keep you pursuing a life you envision for yourself. where is the joy and purpose in pursuing a life you do not like: “‘contentment is an obstacle. joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one’s talents even more widely than one had before’” (“three key questions” by himes – moreau fye week three). joy is so powerful, and especially as a first year it is important to pay attention to where you find joy so you can start https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146605 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146500 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146508 pursuing a life well-lived. it is perfectly acceptable for you to experiment with different classes, clubs, activities, etc. to find what you truly enjoy. as a student it is your job to be in-tune with your own mission, pursue it, and change it if necessary. that is a part of being a college student. i think with my time at notre dame, i will stick with my mission because i feel confident in my values and what i enjoy doing. i think ultimately, “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions keeps us curious…why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” ( “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by eurich – moreau fye week six). asking yourself “why” questions is not as productive as asking “what” questions. finding what you enjoy will take a lot of self-reflection and time, but you have to make sure that you are asking the right questions. if you are constantly stuck in the past by asking “why” questions, then it will be difficult to pursue a life well-lived. pursuing a life well-lived looks different for each one of us because we have different values. my value of community and forming meaningful relationships is what drives me to be the best i can be. i can pursue a life well-lived by getting involved with clubs and activities that i enjoy or becoming a leader within my hall so i can help others to form community with new people. although it will be difficult at times when biases and social media get in the way, i can find ways to remind myself of what i value to continue pursuing the life i want for myself. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146547 integration one the foundations of fulfillment: happiness, experience, and growth i believe happiness, experience, and growth are the foundations for fulfillment. through happiness i am able to find pleasure and enjoyment in my life. through experience i am opened to new perspectives and attitudes. through growth i can come to find my truest self and be shaped into a knowledgeable yet virtuous person. despite only being at notre dame for a short amount of time, i have already formed stronger bonds with friends, gained a better understanding of the importance of time, and distinguished the difference in dominating characteristics within others and myself. i believe that i am searching for happiness. growing up, my parents would always remind me that nothing is more important than finding what makes you truly happy. in my mind, i have gone through phases of assuming happiness corresponds to money, success in sports, high grades, and so many more short term means of pleasure. in high school, i began to understand happiness is truly found in healthy relationships with family, friends, and yourself. although i had this knowledge, it was not until college that i was able to feel the true happiness i had so long struggled to attain. i had been told by many people that i would meet great people in college and be able to see what a healthy relationship looks like; they were right. now i understand that happiness is found in those i surround myself with. reflecting upon some of my high school relationships, i can admit “that’s not love” ("because i love you, double whiskey" by one love foundation moreau fye week four). in class, we discussed relationships and the often overlooked emotional abuse that can be found in friendships as well as romantic relationships. after going over several examples of unhealthy relationships, i noticed similarities to some of those i had thought to be healthy relationships during high school. the relationships allowed me to experience moments of happiness, but they were temporary. i thought i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mwq5ur9oz-g understood happiness, but after coming to notre dame and discussing healthy relationships during class i can confidently say i have experienced happiness during college and know where to find it in my life. i believe that i grow through experience. for months leading up to college i experienced intense anxiety and fear about what the future has in store for me. i convinced myself that life could not possibly be better than how it had been throughout high school, but now i can admit that i was terribly mistaken. i have come to learn that nobody is able to experience greater goods without first stepping out of their comfort zone. initially, i condemned myself for overreacting and allowing such unnecessary worries to have a strong effect on my emotions, but “you can’t numb those hard feelings without numbing the other affects, or emotions [...] you cannot selectively numb” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). since the first week of class, vulnerability was strongly emphasized as important and necessary. i have never been the type of person to share my emotions with others, but while listening to classmates i have grown to understand the benefit of sharing the good parts of life as well as the discomforts. i would not have been able to have such a pleasant college experience so far if i “numbed” my emotions and chose to suppress my anxieties. humanity tends to block out the bad, but keep the good, which is impossible to do. it is important to confront hard feelings, instead of attempting to numb ourselves, that way we can attain more joy and be open to stronger feelings of happiness and goodness. even if the experiences seem daunting, it is through those experiences that i am able to grow more knowledgeable of my own emotions and feel greater happiness; ultimately growing as a person. i believe that i grow through experience. before coming to college, countless people reminded me that time flies by, so it must be used wisely. after starting at notre dame, i have https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be experienced independence, which entails time management and self-structuring. time is finally under my control, thus i now understand its importance. “i rejoice because we have all learned how precious time is […] we can never get more time […] spend it in a way that we get the largest return on our time” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris” moreau fye week five). hearing carla harris speak about the preciousness of time, aligned with everything i have previously heard and reminded me to make the most of my experiences. even though i am only several weeks into college, i can agree that time goes by too quickly. therefore, it is extremely important to take advantage of all opportunities available and to live without regrets. as the speaker explained in the quote, experience is a gift that enables learning and growth. it is important for me to use time wisely and how i desire, because it will lead to growth and happiness when taken advantage of. experience can realign priorities, provide clarity, and enable growth through maturity. i believe that i am responsible for growth in character as well as knowledge. as children, our parents reinforce to us the importance of having “good manners” and being respectful, but eventually there is a shift away from having good character. as good character is pushed to the side, knowledge takes its place in importance. during my high school experience my concerns were rarely about what i should do to be a better person but instead what i should do to be a better student. here at notre dame, i have realized that the mind does not need to be cultivated at the expense of the heart. “and soloveitchik argued that these two sides of our nature are at war with each other. we live in perpetual self-confrontation between the external success and the internal value” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). in class, we discussed eulogy versus resume qualities and characteristics. there are some people that are always described as compassionate and caring, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/28222/modules/items/105996 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim while others may be described as intelligent and curious; it is true that everyone is a mix of characteristics involving the heart and the mind. initially, i believed this meant there is a separation between the heart, virtues and good character, and the mind, being knowledgeable and studious; there does not need to be a separation between the heart and the mind, because they should be incorporated into each other as a way to help us grow as a whole person. our discussion in class opened my eyes to the importance of character growth, instead of focusing merely on academically oriented qualities. happiness, growth, and experience are the foundations upon which i can find my truest self and be the person god intends for me to be. notre dame has opened my eyes to new perspectives, genuine happiness, and areas where i need growth; it is providing a pathway for me to nourish my mind, heart, and soul. fulfillment can only be achieved through change, and during my short time at notre dame i have changed into a person of stronger morals, spirituality, and academics. experiences, whether they be new, exciting, or intimidating, will lead to growth, enabling me to find happiness in my life. week 14capstone integration three mcentee capstone integration assignment spring 2022 jill mcentee planning and pursuing a life well lived my mission in this world is to grow and change and impact other’s lives as well. i want to experience the joys and sufferings that this world has to offer. i want to explore our beautiful world. i have dreams and aspirations, and life is too short to be living someone else’s dream. furthermore, i am truly happy when i am pushed to my limits. a life without challenges is a life without living. i believe that my greatest talents and best gifts are seen in moments of high stress and pressure. one of my goals in life is to make it known that each person in this world deserves dignity and respect. although we should embrace our differences we must also respect our similarities. moreover, when all is said and done the most important things in life are relationships. i realized that people and the relationships that we have with each other matter more than anything else in this world.(my mission statement” by jill mcenteemoreau fye week thirteen) i would define a life well-lived as a life full of people that teach me something different every day. i want to look up 10 years from now and see that i am not in the same place as i was today. an observable sign that i lived a life well-lived is that i am not making the same mistakes at eighty that i am making at eighteen. kiersten dehaven’s domer dozen speech was very insightful and eye-opening. kiersten’s path seems untraditional and full of passion for faith and her community. i was inspired by her dedication and commitment. in my future i would like to work with people from across the world who each contribute different amazing qualities to collaboration. many of my dreams and aspirations are through helping others. (“domer dozen”, by kiersten dehaven moreau fye week two) moreover, i would also like to follow in the footsteps professor steve refenberg of another statement from the article that stood out to me was gutierrez’ comment on not giving a voice to the voiceless, but rather providing an opportunity for people to have a voice. in a developed country such as the u.s. at times there is a sentiment of superiority towards other countries, which is horrible and wrong. however, we all must be educated from a young age that it does not matter whether we live in a prosperous nation or not, each person everywhere deserves the dignity and respect to have their own voice. no one should speak for another, everyone should have the opportunity to share their voice. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve refenbergmoreau fye week nine) i would like this to be my mission in life. making sure it is known that everyone has a voice, no one is voiceless. sometimes no one is listening hard enough. like i stated in my integration earlier this semester, “i do not care about what i did or how i could be described, but rather how i made people feel. (integration 3 by jill mcenteemoreau fye week eight) furthermore, i would like to include everyone on the journey of making sure everyone’s voices are heard. in dr. diangelo’s article about racism, it was very interesting to learn about issues of racism broken down into parts and with a “white” perspective. dr. diangelo also made it very clear that racism is still embedded in our lives. out of every point that dr. diangelo made one that really stood out to me https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit capstone integration assignment spring 2022 was a discussion of our own racism, and the racism of other white people. the answer to this issue was education. as a white person in american society, as i have progressed through school i have learned more and more about my own prejudice. i am taking away the importance of education and action from this article.(“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelomoreau fye week ten). thinking more about racism in our society will set me up to further my mission of making it clear that everyone in our society deserves dignity and respect. moreover, at nineteen one of my own qualities that i have learned over the course of my life is that i live each day excited to talk to people with all different perspectives. i know that every day i can learn from new people and experiences. however, my friend ella told me that i can be spontaneous and adventurous. overall, i really enjoyed this opportunity to talk to ella (conversation with my friend ella moreau fye week five). moreover, as the career center stated, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life! “this quotation resonates with me because i find myself constantly preoccupied with the thought of a perfect future or a five year plan. without trying new things i would not be soaking up every opportunity that the world has to give. something that also stood out to me was the paragraph speaking about doing a job that you love. in my life i would like to choose a job that i love that does not feel like work every day. (“navigating your career journey” by career centermoreau fye week four). ultimately, in “a grotto story,” dr. lim was truly an inspiration. i can not imagine how his accident impacted his life and turned it upside down. it was inspirational to learn about the progress that dr. lim had made. he referred to many of the negative conversations that he had within himself towards his life and dreams .he also discussed how he complained a lot during this time because it felt like his world was over. however he realized over time that he had many gifts and a life under god worth living. thus. in the grotto video it was very clear that mr. lim had begun to appreciate not just the little details of life, but his relationship with god. more specifically, the five minutes every day that he must recline his chair he used to pray and establish a strong relationship with god. (“a grotto story” by mr. lim moreau fye week six). mr. lim’s story and his attitude towards his life and proven to me to never lose faith in god along the journey of my life. similarly, i would like to slow down in my life. the lyer article demonstrated to me how to put away an hour of time to do nothing, i am going to try to put away 5 minutes each day away from the stimulation of my phone and computer. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week one). in my life i would like to slow down and take time for the people around me. in my life my focus is not on the success or achievements, it is on the relationships we make and the paths that they take to create these relationships. this part of the integration is the hardest part for me to grasp: acceptance that life will end. sister aletheia wrote, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” this quote resonated with me because i think death is a fear that we all have. we spend so much time thinking about the future when in reality we https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ capstone integration assignment spring 2022 don’t know what that future looks like.e. we all act like life is continuing and continuing and continuing when in reality that is not the perspective we should have. my mission in life is to hold on to a perspective that life could end tomorrow or way in the future. this fact should not change how we look at the world. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” “by sister aletheia moreau fye week three). in my life, i would like to focus less about a 10 year plan and more like a 10 day plan. life is constantly changing which is why you have to be ready for the different tides. instead of acting like i have an infinite amount of time to live out my dreams, i want to make them possible tomorrow. ultimately, all that matters in my life are relationships. pope francis’ ted talks talk about the importance of our relationships, i believe that is at the core of my dreams and aspirations. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) in the end i would like to be remembered by how i made people feel. in my lifetime i would have liked to have impacted 10 lives for the better.“in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we’re losing our sense of how someone may disagree with us” moreover, i think this quote articulates something that many of us struggle to understand and talk about. in our own minds we very frequently find ourselves in bubbles with people who think similar thoughts to us, when in reality we need to be careful about entering an echo chamber. it is very easy to find ourselves trapped “ in a feedback loop” with people who think the exact same way as ourselves. however, if we constantly are surrounded by people who support the thoughts that we think and never disagree we are not learning anything. i find this to be true with my political beliefs as a political science major. frequently i find myself looking towards one news source versus another, when in reality i should be looking towards many different scholars perspectives. (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko” moreau fye week eleven) “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us.” the quote from dean cole, the dean from notre dame law school resonates with me deeply. i am unable to fathom the experience, pain and suffering that dean cole and his family faced when he was a child or even after the tragic deaths of many african american women and men in this country. for me, the pain and suffering is tragic and needs to change immediately, however i do not live in fear that i am going to be the next target of racial violence and hatred. moreover, dean cole is completely right when he states that he can breathe. we all can breathe right now and we have the opportunity to make changes in the world because we are at notre dame. each day that we breathe we have the opportunity to, as the cliché states, “make the world a better place” (“i am george floyd except, i can breathe. and i can do something”moreau fye week twelve).a world with less hatred, exclusion, discrimination and vioelnce is a world that i would like to create and be a part of. overall my mission is pursuing a life-well lived is to experience life to the fullest, learn from many of my mistakes, but also leave positive impacts wherever i go. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ final_integration_prugh maria finan moreau fye section 82 april 29th, 2022 reflection & responsibility: leading a life well-lived over the past year, i have begun a new chapter of my life. however, this transitory period has called for a great deal of reflection regarding what i’ve learned in the past and what i want my future to look like. the conversations that i’ve had with my peers, friends, loved ones, and mentors over the last several months have helped me to define what a life well-lived means for me moving forward. as i forge ahead through the next phase of my life, my mission is to construct a life that is intellectually fulfilling, prioritizes well-being, and is full of fruitful and rewarding relationships. i intend to avoid compromising any one of these goals for the others. in order to satisfy my goal of an intellectually fulfilling life, i will need to be honest with myself about where my passion lie. this goal will challenge me to construct a career path that aligns with my interests instead of the expectations of others. i also plan to build a career that leaves a lasting, positive impact. i want to be sure that i am using my life to contribute to something greater than myself. the prioritization of well-being will require building a habit of taking a step back and seeing the circumstances of my life from a wider perspective. a large piece of pursuing my intellectual and personal goals includes maintaining a lifestyle that keeps me well enough to be able to give energy and effort to the things i hope to accomplish. finally, building rewarding relationships will also require a degree of widened perspective and accountability. one of the great joys of a life well-lived is the ability to engage in community and to build meaningful connections with other people, and i expect myself to embrace the opportunity to do so. as previously stated, the determination of how to best approach a life well-lived has required a great deal of self-reflection. it can be difficult to find time to allocate to reflecting on the state of one’s life, however, it is vital to the process of discerning a life path. as discussed at the beginning of the semester, “the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one).” taking this time to reflect actually allows us to live a more meaningful life, and it helps us to understand what we aim to change about ourselves or our circumstances. the first year at university has necessitated much time for pondering my life choices. from my major, to which opportunities were important for me to pursue, to how i wanted to best take advantage of the college experience, i have benefitted immensely from the time that i’ve spent reflecting over the past year. another way to find encouragement to lead a well-lived life is to take inspiration from others. being at notre dame has offered me many opportunities to learn from the people that i admire. i’ve met many professors and mentors who have given me much-needed guidance as to how to create a meaningful life. i’ve also found inspiration from figures of the past, including father hesburgh. “in my faith, you learn that there is meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two).” this quote, from the “hesburgh” film, has helped me to navigate my life by emphasizing how positive aspects can be found in the worst of situations. this quote has helped me to view suffering and obstacles not as setbacks, but rather as opportunities to learn and grow. the advice of sister theresa alethia noble affected me in a similar way. as i have allocated a great deal of time to consider where my future may lead me, her statement that “… it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three)” has helped me to find motivation and purpose. our time is very limited, but this makes it precious. when we look at situations and see the darkness of my life, this is simply an opportunity to seek out ways that we can contribute to bringing more light into the world around us. my first year of college has involved extensive reflection on where i would like my career to lead me. this process has been stressful and overwhelming at times, but i have found solace in the guidance that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four).” a major turning point in my perspective has been realizing that there is no one way to live a life well-lived. there are so many ways to use one’s skills, interests, and passions to create a meaningful and impactful career, and purpose can be found in any career field. of course, there are paths that may be more suited to my individual talents and values, but if i allow myself to pursue opportunities that i am gravitated toward, i will likely end up where i am meant to be. it has also been helpful to speak to the people who know me well about my career discernment journey. one conversation in particular that i had with my parents taught me about the importance of being sure to prioritize my own well-being and happiness as i make decisions about my future. my parents are passionate advocates for mental health and the prioritization of relationships and friendships, and they advised me that there is no singular formula for success (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). this was helpful to me, as it can be easy to feel an obligation to pursue as many opportunities as possible and to work to be on par with my peers. however, at the end of the day, leading a life well-lived necessitates being able to continue this life in a healthy and sustainable way. burnout and overextending oneself lower one’s ability to continue pursuing purpose and meaningful impact. recently, a friend sent me a social media post in which a student detailed the advice of her professor. the professor discussed how most students in college feel a need, at least in a small way, to somehow try to save the world. however, the professor stated, “it’s okay if you only save one person, and it’s okay if that person is you.” planning a life well-lived and following through on pursuing that life can present many challenges. sometimes, we can stand in our own way as we try to find purpose and meaning. i’ve talked a lot about the importance of reflection in building a well-lived life, but at times it is important to take a step away from pondering. “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six).” this quote from the moreau content is a reminder that as important as self-awareness is, it is crucial that we are able to bring ourselves back to reality. getting caught in a cycle of self-criticism can have the opposite result of what is intended, and instead of becoming better from it, we can begin to feel hopeless and question our own value. in my philosophy university seminar, we’ve had many discussions about what it means to have a purpose as a human. we talked about how we often have a close association between our productivity and our value as human beings. the major takeaway of this conversation, for me, was that there is value in simply existing. of course, being a productive member of society is helpful to the betterment of the world and is something that we should strive for, but our value cannot entirely be placed on being an ideal citizen. to return to my mission statement, it is important to me to live a life that is enriched by meaningful relationships with other people. one thing that i’ve learned over the past year has been the importance of community and the surprising ease with which we can embrace those around us. in “tattoos on the heart”, fr. greg boyle states that “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven).” this quote is meaningful to me because it highlights how we are surrounded by the possibility of connection. at times, it can be easy to fall into isolation or to perpetuate a distance between ourselves and others, but, if we simply look for it, we will find that there are connections and mutuality to be found all around us. building relationships, especially those that bridge divides or connect people from vastly different backgrounds, can be intimidating due to a fear of not being able to understand the other party. another valuable lesson that i’ve learned in recent months is the tool of accompaniment. as said by professor steve reifenberg, “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine).” i’ve learned that accompaniment is the ability to help and support others without overstepping or overshadowing the other person’s needs. i think that it’s easy to fall to extremes when it comes to difficult situations. we can either shy away completely or assume too much authority over a situation. accompaniment teaches us to build relationships through communication, to help when help is wanted, and to listen to the experiences of others. the act of building fruitful relationships rests heavily on embracing inclusion and opportunities to learn about people of all experiences, backgrounds, identities, and walks of life. as a straight, white woman, i’ve learned a lot over the past few years of my life about the importance of acknowledging my privilege. by listening to my friends, and peers, and by doing what i can to educate myself on social and political issues on my own, i have realized the advantages that my identity and position in life have offered me. dr. robin diangelo’s writing from “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” struck me as particularly meaningful as it articulated the situations, sometimes uncomfortable, that must be navigated in order to create a better world, and why these situations are uncomfortable in the first place. the article explained how “while individual whites may be against racism, they still benefit from the distribution of resources controlled by their group (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten).” in the less than diverse communities that i have been raised around, i’ve seen the “white fragility” that d’angelo speaks of in his article, and how white communities react when ideas of meritocracy are called into question. as a person with a great deal of privilege, i understand how it is appealing to believe that the success i have attained is purely a result of my own hard work, but acknowledging that i have been advantaged by systemic and institutional discrimination is necessary and doesn’t discredit my hard work. it simply means that, while i have faced challenges, i have never had to face being discriminated against on the basis of race or sexuality. while working to build and strengthen relationships and communities, it is also important to avoid framing those with different perspectives as enemies. “instead of hating the other side, instead of hating a random person who says they're republican or says they're democrat, they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction? (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven).” this quote is important because it highlights the importance of seeing interactions with people of opposing views as opportunities for discussion. we must avoid operating on the bases of hatred, and instead, we must approach these conversations as chances to share our understanding of issues and to listen to what the other person has to say. bridging divides and lessening hatred also means taking action when necessary. in the content for one of the final weeks of moreau, the writing of dean g. marcus cole offered a call to action, saying that “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do. (“dean g. marcy cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week twelve).” from my perspective, the dean’s message is meaningful because it emphasizes the ability of every person to make an impact on the world. something that i’ve taken away from this year has been that we all end up leaving an impact on the world. however, it is up to us whether this impact is positive or negative. i will end with a piece from the university of notre dame’s own mission statement. “the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week thirteen).” as a first-year college student, there is much to be learned about what it means to lead a life well-lived, but i have already learned so much about the kind of person i want to be and about the responsibility that i bear. as i move forward through the next several years, i will take these lessons with me and continue to do my best to better myself and fulfill my goals. integration three final gillespie 1 victoria j. gillespie professor bryan reaume moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the memory of a creator here i stand, at my own funeral, watching the solemn faces of everyone who decided to attend. i want to tell everyone that i love them, but i know they cannot hear me since i am in the afterlife now. i hear whispers about how creative i was, and i can now rest peacefully knowing that my creations are what people remember the most about me. creation was my ultimate goal in life. i wanted to create art, something that others could enjoy. i wanted to create a great environment, one who welcomed everyone and felt secure. most importantly, i wanted to create the best version of myself, so that when this time came i would leave my loved one without regret. i spent a long time during my life thinking about if i encountered myself in my daily life, how would i feel? would i get along with myself? for a long time it was hard to think positively of myself, i thought that did not matter. i thought the relationship between me and myself was insignificant, until i came to learn that that was the most important relationship of all. usually, eulogies are meant to invite others to share their thoughts and feelings towards one’s former life. however, this eulogy is personal, i want to reflect on my memories and how i’m going to be remembered. my childhood was so long ago, yet it set the tone for the rest of my life. my struggles, personal battles, and challenges all trace back to my childhood. surrounded by instability and insecurity, i dreamt of a life where i had complete control over myself and my circumstances. at a very young age, i started to put so much pressure on myself. i thought that one wrong move mailto:breaume@nd.edu gillespie 2 could mess up my entire life. i became very introspective, overthinking all of my actions and reactions, which caused me to experience a lot of stress and anxiety. i would try to search within myself for the answers to all of my problems. i would constantly question myself: “why is life so hard?” “why can’t i be happy like everyone else?” it only led to a spiral of negative thoughts, creating problems without solutions. as i matured, i learned that i should ask “what” instead of “why” more often, and it helped me acknowledge the things that were within my sphere of influence (“the right way to be introspective (yes there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week six). i realized that it was unrealistic to try and control everything within my life, and it helped me to have a more positive opinion of myself since i stopped blaming myself for things that were outside of my control. i began to engage in positive self-talk, which made reflection a more enjoyable and beneficial experience overall. time began to slow down, and life was no longer about producing perfection, but finding my own personal fulfillment. i used to think of every day in relation to the next, but i tried to live the majority of my life in the present (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i found a love for art, and enjoyed sharing it with others. drawing was one of my favorite pastimes, and i wanted to find a way to share my drawings with others. i never understood the notion of settling with one career, i could never find happiness staying in one place. by the end of my life graphic designer, illustrator, animator, video game designer, graphic novelist, and freelance artist were all titles under my name. all of these occupations gave me the opportunity and creative freedom to share my ideas with the world, a source of joy that no other industry could give me (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). standing before me are people who mourn my https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ gillespie 3 absence, but i hope they always feel my presence through my work. people would always tell me that they could tell when i had a role in creating something, that those words always put a smile on my face. oddly enough, my artwork always reminded me of my death. i would often think about what part of me will live on, and how i could surround my legacy in positivity. after i finished school, i spent the best part of my life creating up until the day i died. i was well aware of the limited time i had, and treated every art piece as if it was my last (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i framed my life around those who had amazing legacies, a strong influence on me was theodore hesburgh. i wasn’t very religious myself, but that was a man who truly did his best until the end; i wanted to be as influential as him (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). when i knew my life was coming to an end, i was not sure if i had succeeded in having a positive impact on those around me. however, i look around this room and see the amount of people i reached and i know that i have a reason to feel proud of myself. my family decided to put up one of my self-portraits instead of a photograph near my casket, and it makes me happy to see just how important my artwork is to others. i think about how easy it is to make these statements now, how “proud” i am of my life. i remember for a long time i found it hard to talk about myself positively, and struggled with confidence. simply having the ability to be at ease with how my life has ended is a sign of how much my soul grew throughout the years. i had to learn to take down my barriers, and let people into my “jurisdiction” (chapter 8 of “tattoos on the heart” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i was so guarded for a long time, and coming to peace with the feelings i had toward myself and others was what allowed me to lead a life worthy of praise. one of my most influential memories that made me begin to be more kind towards myself was a conversation i https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/523820/download?download_frd=1 gillespie 4 had late at night with some friends back in college (conversation with friends moreau fye week five). i told them about how critical i was of myself, and my stress around not being good enough for anyone, or anything i seek to do in life. seeing that they still had a deep appreciation for everything that i did despite the flaws that i mentally fixated on motivated me to have a better self-image. those five friends are sitting in this funeral service today, and hearing their eulogies put my soul more at ease. i know nobody here at my funeral will hear me, but i want them to know that their love and support for me allows me to rest in peace. i created a life that was full of love and positivity, now i can go into my eternal rest knowing that my life was a life well-lived. father, brother, role model this is ’s eulogy. he was not famous, he was not known by a large number of people, but the people who did get to know him will not forget. jose was seen as someone who was not scared of seeking discomfort, of trying new things. an example of this is how he had this idea of participating in an “internet sabbath.” he knew that “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). technology provides us with a really big amount of information, some might say it provides us with all the information, everything except one thing: what is the best use of technology? technology will never be used in the best of ways, but maybe the only way of finding the best use would be through an “internet sabbath.” jose was always interested in trying this idea of a break without any technology or social media. he had questions about it concerning the necessities of technology, what would he do if someone wants to know where he is or how he is doing. he wanted to find the answer and tried it for himself. he spent a while in this break and jose was definitely satisfied with the outcome of this. he felt more free and relaxed, he understood the stress that is brought with social media, and how comfortable it was to not think about it. jose always loved helping people, he taught all of us that everyone should do it, and how it should be done. he demonstrated that helping can be done in different manners, through “faith, service, learning, and work” (“young alumni recognition initiative” by youngnd board moreau fye week two). these were his four fundamental tenets, he acted through this mission statement, the different types of help someone can give. through faith we can help people who need it, give those people hope, jose taught us that there will always be someone who needs the help. service and work were pretty similar, both refer to doing physical work and helping others directly. finally, helping through learning is one of the most powerful ones. learning helps make the future a better place, it is what shapes people, and it is really important. one of jose’s most important traits is that he was a really happy person. everytime you looked at him he was laughing, it could be by himself or nothing, but you could always see his smile. if you were to ask someone who knew jose, there is a really small chance that they have seen him mad. jose lived with joy, “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). people may think that a person that laughs at everything is kind of weird, but jose did not think that way. he saw it as a gift, he found things to laugh about when there wasn’t, and he always tried to make people laugh. joy comes from your confidence in your life, of how you are living it, you feel it when you are living how you would want to. jose hurtado loved what he did, he was an architect. he has his accomplishments and his buildings across the world. he decided to follow this career path and he loved every step of the way. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). jose started pursuing this career without knowing much about how it would work after college. he worked hard on researching and planning his future, and he finished with something he loved, he was happy with what he accomplished. once, jose and i had a conversation for an assignment (moreau fye week 5). i knew him for a long time so he chose to have this conversation with me because i was supposed to answer questions about him. i told him that what i thought he desired most was happiness, his happiness and that of the others. he always puts his family and friends first, i always saw him talking through facetime to some family member, always a different one. i also mentioned the thing about him always laughing at anything. another question asked when i saw jose in “the zone.” jose’s zone always had to do with things he loved, you could see his concentration and happiness behind it when he played basketball or when he was drawing. he loved both of those things. the final thing to do was to tell him something that he needs to hear but will be tough to absorb. i am pretty sure he already knew what i was going to say, he actually asked a lot more people to tell him something hard to listen to, and everyone said the same thing. everyone was telling him to be more productive, he was known as the one who was never doing homework, i don’t know how he did it, but i truly almost never saw him working. jose told me that once in a while he analyzed himself, he did introspection. he also liked to specify that he did it the correct way, and that he did it quickly, he sometimes acted in some way, and then realized that he did not like how he acted, thought about it, and tried his best to change it for the next time. “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” (”the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). jose, or chema, as i called him, had this wonderful belief, which is my favorite of all of his, “in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). chema remembered people by how they acted, and what he did not like and what he did, this way he could implement the good things in his life. he was a weird type of courageous, he was not afraid of somethings i would have, but i think it was because he was confident that the other person would not act wrongly, he was a hopeful person. and, well, creative, he made the weirdest drawings, i do not know how he even thought about them. i want everyone to remember me as a kind man. that is what i meant by role model, i want people to think about me and want to be as kind as i am. just like me when i think about my grandfather. integration three will always be remembered today we come together to celebrate the life of a genuine individual. she leaves a huge emptiness in the hearts of all of us, but we must keep her in our memory. she deserves these words due to her vibrant energy, caring soul, and desire to serve those around her. we have gathered to remember her, so that we may continue to live our lives as she did. a life �lled with gratitude, joy, and love. regina, reg, regis, gallina was beautiful inside and out. it may sound cliche, but you could feel her energy whenever she was near. her radiant smile and loving personality would light up the room. she was bubbly, funny, talkative, and just like no other. ever since she was a little girl, she would face challenges head on. not a day went by where she did not show this determination and persistency. regina was inclined to tackle any obstacle and ambitious to leave a legacy behind. she graduated from the university of notre dame with a degree in mechanical engineering, and proceeded to get her mba at stanford. she took this knowledge to tackle problems in our society such as helping with the water crisis. regina was able to unite our community even more with her great desire for peace. just like father hesburgh, she “loved to watch people who didn’t agree with anything get in a room and bridge all of that” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau fye week two). she had the ability to create peace even there was no sign of it. she was the catalyst that everyone needed. regina was able to unite everyone regardless of their ethnicity, belief and culture. regina lived a life well-lived as she was a loving mother to her two daughters, a supportive wife, and a leader in her community. regina never failed to aid her neighbors, and spread the love and peace that our world greatly craves. she enjoyed life, and made the most of it. regina knew that she had one life, and that if she was going to live it, she was going to live it with a smile on her face. she knew that there was going to be a day where she would no longer be part of this world. as sister aletheia said, “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing…remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly di�cult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). by knowing the limited time that one has, she never turned down an opportunity. living in three di�erent countries, all with di�erent native languages, she took the time and e�ort to learn how to communicate and get around. she participated in all the sports tournaments, trips, and international events. while many others could have locked themselves in the room and live in the past, she did the opposite. mending friendships with anyone who would cross her way, and never hesitating to take the initiative to be someone you could count on. she lived by the words of pope francis, “the future you: the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters because life �ows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” ted talk by pope francis moreau fye week seven). she found it essential not to limit herself to a certain friend group, but rather open herself uo to meeting new people and learning from them. she https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript believed that humanity is meant to form deep connections and should always be based on goodness and love. she reminded herself daily that any day she could not wake up, and for that exact reason, there was never a time she didn’t say bye without including the word “love”. regina was the person who wanted you to know that you were in her heart. there was never a time she would not worry for others problems, and not reserve a time to help them. she was a constant reminder to live your life to the fullest. regina was an individual who was deep in her roots. growing up in the south, attending school in europe, and going back to mexico, she managed to stay connected to the latino culture. no matter how far she was she was always connected to her home. her de�nition of home was not a place, but rather the people in it. she never lost love for any of the three countries she lived in because of the friendships she created there. she would always �nd a way to connect with old friends, and put forth constant e�ort to keep her relationships. regina lived by this quote, “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). whatever part in the world she was, she would �nd this sense of familiarity as she would meet one more person she could call a friend. eventhough regina was always everywhere, she would always make time for herself. she knew the importance of what she would call “me” time. she would devote time for herself to hit the gym, cook new meals, or try new activities. she was an adventure junkie, and always put self-care �rst. however, she would do all of this to an extent as she knew that “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-re�ection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started”(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau week six). regina kept her journals, but there was always a time she would stop, think, and breathe. regina lived her last chapters with a smile on her face. she never forgot the importance of having fun, and always found joy in everything. so, i invite all of you, to do the same so you can be remembered the way she was. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/#:~:text=we%20can%20spend%20endless%20amounts,of%20sydney%20psychologist%20anthony%20m. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/#:~:text=we%20can%20spend%20endless%20amounts,of%20sydney%20psychologist%20anthony%20m. microsoft word soza integration four.docx soza 1 fr. kevin sandberg moreau fye, section 121 29 april 2022 recognizing the value of a notre dame education throughout this semester and this school year, i feel that i have grown as an individual both inside and outside the classroom allowing me to recognize my capacity for and drive to be a leader. as i mentioned in week 13’s reflection, annie dillard’s metaphor comparing a mountain to a new frontier can be applied to a college freshman’s experiences at the end of one school year (week 13 reflection). looking out over the mountain now, i see a very different outlook than what i saw when i stepped foot on campus in august. i have pursued new extracurricular activities, formed strong friendships, and grown deeper in my faith. these opportunities have allowed me to recognize my drive for creating inspiring change as a leader. by getting involved in the notre dame community, having good mentors, and forming strong friendships, i have been able to discover this drive for leadership within me. this semester, i have been adamant about taking advantage of every opportunity to exhibit leadership and take on responsibilities for the benefit of others. one of the reasons that i felt called to pursue these opportunities is because i feel “at home” while on campus and recognize the value of the notre dame community. my feelings greatly contrast with the problems william deresiewicz claims are spreading throughout college campuses across the nation. in the reading for week 1’s reflection, deresiewicz explains college students, today, are always focused on creating an advantage in their future prospects—job applications, graduate school applications, etc. (deresiewicz, 2014). this attitude has caused great unhappiness and soza 2 despair because people are not acting out of a genuine interest in a given activity, rather individuals are more concerned with materialism. while i do sometimes act in this way, i have felt called this semester to use my talents for the benefit of others in the knights of columbus council 1477 here on campus, going against the culture deresiewicz discusses. this week, i was elected to be the outside guard for the next academic year meaning i will be involved in coordinating the council’s outreach with outside organizations. as i reflected on the readings from this semester, i was struck by gustavo gutierrez’s comments on solidarity: “the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard” (reifenberg, 2008). i hope that over this next school year, i can use my talents to be a successful accompagnateur by abiding by gutierrez’s call to action: “to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard” (reifenberg, 2008). gutierrez’s commentary was interspersed within steve reifenberg’s broader discussion of accompaniment. while i am excited to be involved in the council’s leadership, there are also some elements of optimism and pessimism that pervade through my mind. however, as i discussed in my reflection for week 10, “the commitment to lifelong learning allows one to evade these two camps and come to see both the positives and negatives in a given situation, creating a better chance for change” (week 10 reflection). i hope that i can demonstrate a commitment to lifelong learning in my actions over the course of the next year. i also hope that this commitment to lifelong learning can help assuage the difficulties of leadership: “as a leader, i often find it difficult to analyze a situation and develop a solution to a problem all by myself; consequently, i find deresiewicz’s commentary to not only be relevant but also correct. if i want to make changes and take action in an organization, i need to have someone to confide in” soza 3 (week 7 reflection). having strong mentors has allowed me to develop my passion for lifelong learning, and having good friends has allowed me to become a better leader. while i may have had these desires to improve myself and become a successful leader within my community, i realized during the process of seeking these leadership opportunities that having good mentors is essential to my success as a person both inside and outside the classroom. sharon daloz parks observes mentors are essential for aiding people on their journeys by allowing people to come in touch with reality: “indeed, good mentors help to anchor the promise of the future. as young adults are beginning to think critically about self and world, mentors give them crucial forms of recognition, support, and challenge” (parks, 2000). this support can cause a person to change his course of action or continue along the same planned-out path. in week 3’s reflection, i disagreed with fr. himes’s call to remain in one’s community when pursuing a vocation: “[i]ndividuals can be called to pursue their passions in other territories. more and more individuals are leaving their hometowns to pursue opportunities in other cities, states, and countries. these opportunities should still be considered part of one’s vocation” (week 3 reflection). i no longer agree with this opinion i expressed 12 weeks ago. my opinion changed because of professor patrick deneen’s lecture on wendell berry’s call for agrarianism in my liberalism and conservatism class. prof. deneen argued communities are collapsing because there no longer exists a desire to remain in one’s community. if this trend continues, communities are guaranteed to collapse. this rhetoric caused me to change my opinion because i want to ensure the communities and tradition are respected. my opinions about a topic also changed when we discussed the power of student athletes. before watching howard bryant’s talk, i was highly skeptical toward athlete protests; however, i came to recognize the power of student-athletes’ power: “i was fascinated by bryant’s argument that college athletes soza 4 could shut down the entire industry in a day if the athletes all decided to band together and support one another” (week 11 reflection). i came to see the validity of bryant’s argument by talking with one of my friends who is a student-athlete at a different school. he discussed with me how his whole team shaved their heads to raise money for cancer research. through talking with him, i came recognize how student athletes can positively affect the world through their actions. outside of the classroom, my rector has been extremely valuable in helping me pursue transformative leadership. my rector recognized my commitment to being involved in our dorm masses and dorm community and asked me to take on more leadership responsibilities in the dorm this year and next year. he wants me to be involved as the leader of our liturgical ministries in the dorm and the grill team leader for our signature event, gamewatch. seeing that my rector recognizes my drive for leadership has been good for my psyche and has compelled me to continue seeking leadership opportunities. in addition to a drive to seek leadership positions and having good mentors to lead me in the right direction, i have also benefitted from having good friends, including ones from back home and others i have met during my freshman year. as fr. michael himes discussed, surrounding oneself with a good group of friends is necessary to recognize one’s capacity for transformative leadership: “the fostering of a community of friends who can be honest with us and whom we can genuinely hear, before whom and with whom we can be open and humble. that circle of friends is crucial to vocational discernment” (himes). often, individuals can doubt their own skills at a given task or believe they are not worthy of pursuing a career in that field. it is the job of their friends to lead them back to reality, allowing a recognition of talent (week 4 reflection). this semester, i have grown closer with a friend of mine since kindergarten. although he attends a different school, we have made the effort this semester, especially since soza 5 the start of lent, to talk with one another once a week and just catch up. when i am having a bad week or doubting myself, i turn to this friend because he knows me so well. this friendship has been so beneficial for me because this friend allows me to move forward instead of fixating like dr. eurich suggests: “asking “why?” in one study appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward” (eurich, 2017). as i move forward, i now recognize that i must be willing to ask, “what am i going to do to change?” if i want to become the best version of myself that i can become. furthermore, the rekindling of this friendship has allowed to become wiser because this friend has allowed me recognize that i do not know everything and that’s perfectly fine. this realization has allowed me to “be more open about a given scenario, preventing him from falling into existing biases. a mark of wisdom is the absence of acting on implicit biases and stereotypes” (week 12 reflection). by reflecting on the pursuit of wisdom, i have thought greatly about the value of introspection. this friendship that i have strengthened this semester has allowed me to review how i view introspection: “introspection means talking to yourself, and one of the best ways of talking to yourself is by talking to another person. one other person you can trust, one other person to whom you can unfold your soul. one other person you feel safe enough with to allow you to acknowledge things--to acknowledge things to yourself--that you otherwise can't” (deresiewicz, 2009). without the strengthening of this old friendship, i do not believe the happiness i experience now would have been completely possible. a notre dame education is different from every other university in the country not because notre dame has instituted a different curriculum or has different programs for study. instead, a notre dame education is different because notre dame combines great people and faith. this is different from other catholic universities because notre dame is uniquely soza 6 collaborative and tight-knit community. these characteristics allow someone to recognize their full potential and to paraphrase mendoza’s motto, “grow the good in the world.” the end of the line? if someone were to ask me if i thought tanish was the same person before we met, i would say no. but at the same time, in many ways, he was still the same person; his personality and his morals still stayed the same but the way he chose to go out and decide to perceive perspectives and events have changed. i hope people noticed that even after he’s 6 feet underground. the various experiences and events that tanish has been a part of for the past years made me see how he has altered the way he handles different situations and people and ultimately contributed to his well-lived life. despite tanish not being able to be here with us right now, here are a few things that i believe made tanish’s life meaningful. tanish and i had conversations about the influence of technology in our lives. we watched a tedx talk together about the impact of technology and there’s this one quote that we both found to be extremely impactful. the quote mentions, “and the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them. the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology.” (week 1, why we need to slow down our lives). this quote was extremely insightful as tanish and i stumbled into this video during midterm week. at the time this quote was extremely insightful because with all our academic and social obligations that we need to fulfill it‘s sometimes really easy to get caught up in our work and social media that we have forgotten how to appreciate the things we have in front of us. it’s important for us to sometimes take a break from our screens no matter how urgent the task is because we need to begin to cherish the moments with the people who matter the most to us.  in addition to slowing down our lives, tanish also found solace in understanding others and their differences. f.r hesburgh once said, “the assumption people have is that every time you have changed, it’s bad. i say i assume that change is the price of progress.” tanish prioritized creating change in our society, and viewing our counterparts as equals is extremely significant to progress as a community. throughout his life, he adopted the values fr. hesburgh demonstrated throughout the documentary and create change in efforts of creating progress (week 2, hesburgh). tanish also adopted values into his career. at times it was tough for him to discover the passions he wanted to pursue as a career. it’s tough to stick with our interests and what career path is the best fit for us because it’s tough to look past the monetary incentives a job offers you and pursue something you feel genuinely passionate about. however, as his close friend, it was evident that he pursued the things he felt passionate about, which is why i believe he lived a life well-lived (week 4, exploring a life well-lived). i believe that tanish also lived a good life because he looked for advice from his mentors. with help from his mentors, he was able to introspect the reasons behind why he does the things he does.  this is what led him to live a life where he can be used as a means for good but simultaneously work a lucrative career to pursue things that he personally enjoys doing. it was important to him to become a means for good because there are many social issues that he resonated with that i believe need more attention including equality that needs to be more pressed on in our present culture (week 5, interview).  i believe tanish adopted all these values because of his spiritual beliefs. during one of his moreau classes, he understood the importance of self-reflection and how important it was to ground himself spiritually. as it lead him to reflect back on the things he could’ve done better which allowed him to improve as a person (week 6, the right way to be instropective) and altered the way he began to form relationships (week 7, why the only future worth living includes everyone).   to close off this eulogy, i would like to quote sister aletheia, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” we often forget that we never know how much time left we have on this earth and always take the little things in life for granted. the mindset of us being young and thinking that we have all the time in the world is the wrong mindset to have. we must find ways to remind ourselves that life is precious and wisely spend the time we have here. now, we worry about the most arbitrary things. we have to learn that it’s okay to let loose and understand that we should spend our time on this earth with the people we care and love and set aside time for things that make me happy and fulfilled. we never know how much time we have left. we must understand that fulfilling goals that don’t make us happy in the long run are not equivalent to a life well-lived. we have to focus our efforts and time on moments and causes we deem important and pursue things that genuinely make us happy (week 3, meet the nun who wants you to remember you’ll die).  it may be the end of the line for tanish, but it’s not for everyone listening to this eulogy. when you dedicate yourself to living life to the fullest, you feel like you can overcome anything. each day is an opportunity for greatness, and you feel fresh and ready to find it. in addition, living life to the fullest means you are in tune with yourself. this allows you to make conscious decisions that directly affect you. moreau capstone integration o’connor 1 cashel o’connor father kevin sandberg capstone integration 18 april 2022 this is water: life as a fish if i was tasked with providing a succinct summation of my experience in moreau, both this semester and last, i would describe my journey as, “learning that the world is bigger than just me.” almost every week, my pre-established beliefs and convictions were challenged by the material, instructor, and classmates. without this constant exposure to new stories, viewpoints, experiences, and backgrounds, the growth that i experienced over the course of the class would be impossible. my last integration was titled “the man in the arena,” in reference to thoedore roosevelt’s famous speech. in my paper, i talked about how i saw myself as the man in the arena, with the onus entirely mine to bear as i sought joy. now, i realize that i only managed to answer the first of father himes’s three questions: is this a source of joy? (week 3). blinded by my focus on myself, i managed to bypass the third–and most important–question: is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large? that is what i seek to answer in this paper, namely, “what is water?” to continue on the path of reflecting upon my past and criticizing it in the hopes of learning from it (what i now see as the proper interpretation of “the man in the arena” speech), i want to put my first integration, from the fall semester, under the microscope. in it, i say that “at the end of my journey to self-actualization, i see myself as a vintager in the vineyard of my mind: happily harvesting the sweet, succulent fruits of my labor as i reflect blissfully on the journey of self-actualization i have just completed” (integration 1). oh how naive! o’connor 2 self-actualization, i now realize, can never come simply from my own actions and labors, for humans by nature are social beings and happiness is inherently derived, whether in some great or small quantity, by others and our impact in their life. in his comments to me on this first, primitive integration, father kevin continued with the wine metaphors and introduced the word sommelier, which means wine servant. it may have taken two semesters and two more integrations, but i finally have found the perfect application for the word in regards to my own life and my own future aspirations. self-actualization–which i now define as joy–is still to be a vintager in the vineyard of my own mind, yes, but instead of harvesting the fruits of my labor i am harvesting the fruits of my experiences, reflecting on all i have done, and then becoming a sommelier myself. a wine servant; however, in this application i am not serving wine, but instead the lessons i have learned over the course of my life. whether that is as a teacher, a parent, a husband, a coach, or a mentor i am not sure yet. the key takeaway here is that i will have lived my life with the knowledge that life itself is bigger than just me and my own needs. the title of this paper is, in itself, a metaphor for the fact that the world is bigger than just me. in week 1, i talked about the dilemma i am faced with in both major selection and, more broadly, career discernment. i spoke about “hopping off the treadmill” and doing something of my own volition, which was adding pls as a second major (week 1). the idea of the clash between taking either the finance route or the liberal arts route is one that has come up in the majority of my reflections, and i feel as if, now more than ever, i am truly equipped to be able to give an answer. the first step to this realization was in week 4, when i decided that making a living and making a meaning were connected. i was left with the question of what gave me this conviction, and i realize now that fulfillment is what i ultimately desire, and, looking around, the most fulfilled people i know are those both simultaneously making a living and making a o’connor 3 meaning (week 4). how to do this i am not sure, but i do believe what deresiewicz said in his paper on solitude and leadership: there is more to life than just being an “excellent sheep” (week 7). somehow i have to find a way to break out of the routine. i love that this is applied to leadership as well, for leading is a great way to have an impact on more people than just yourself (week 7). i am not saying that i have to become a vigilante, but more of an iconoclast. perhaps that is why i have always loved the villain archetype, as they always seem to be the best at philosophizing, or as meghan in week 12 put it, “joining up the circles” (week 12). the most critical aspect of this is of course action, for we lead by example not words. i have a great opportunity moving forward as the president of my residence hall to help others realize that the world is bigger than just us by showing them. in the theme of leadership, i would be remiss if i did not mention empathy. in week 10, i learned about the earnest world changer and the sophisticated pessimist. both of these stereotypes, reifenberg claims, are missing the critical ability to “accompany” (week 10). they either think service is their destiny or service interferes in the lives of others. it takes empathy to be a good accompagnateur. you have to walk in the shoes of those who you are trying to serve to understand how to ensure that their voices are heard. it is not about speaking for others, but instead about enabling others to be heard. applying this to leadership, since i am elected to serve, it is not about me speaking for my community but instead enabling my community to be heard. (week 10). instead of telling them that we are all fish swimming in the same water, i should swim beside them and accompany them while they in turn accompany me. in a more broad sense, taking into account my entire future leads me to my ultimate goal: becoming a professor. i want to come back as the sommelier and share the fruits of my labor with the next generation of students. that is my true capacity for social change. finally i have o’connor 4 been able to realize that the greatest joy of all is sharing your experiences with others while simultaneously learning from them. the mentor/mentee relationship that parks talked about in week 4 is my true path to fulfillment (week 4). note that the title is from “this is water” by david foster wallace, a book that i spoke about briefly in my week 6 reflection (week 6). the metaphor of the fish and the water communicates what i believe moreau as a course has been trying to tell me all along: life is bigger than just me. i hope to apply this realization as i lead in the future, both short-term as a hall president and long-term as a notre dame graduate. to lead in this sense means to lead with action, with empathy, with accompaniment and with many accompagnateurs, and, finally, to lead both as a mentee and a mentor. now i have answered father himes’s third question. remember, we are all swimming in the same water. moreau capstone integration april 29, 2022 living a life well lived i will pursue a life well lived by practicing the good methods of self-reflection we’ve learned in class and comparing my present to the future that i want. without guidance reflection is wasted, as “thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” (moreau week 6 – “the right way to be introspective”tasha eurich) as the present is inherently changing, and my future goals may change over time, only through repeated comparison can i be sure that i’m on track. as of right now my personal mission is to give back to the world in the ways that it has given to me. i will seek to understand, both academically and interpersonally, as this will enable me to succeed and help others. i will do my best to foster mutual respect. only by respecting others can one deserve to be respected, and thus be an upstanding member of the community. every day will be a new opportunity, both to give and receive. through respect and offers to help i will seize opportunities to grow as a person and as the member of the community that i want to be. i will be responsible at work and at home. my children will hopefully grow up as academically successful as i was, though i won’t hold them to that same standard if it’s not for them, and i don’t intend to even tell them how i did in school if they don’t ask. i hope to foster a love of learning early in life that will carry them through their careers both academic and in the work force. my family life will hopefully be rich with experiences shared in my off hours from work. i hope that even if i cannot be at home all of the time, i will at least leave my children with good memories of time spent with me. if they’re anything like me they’ll also value alone time, and i won’t hesitate to grant it to them if they want it. at work i will be responsible for results in whatever department of whatever company i am in. i intend to work quickly but safely in order to deliver engineering solutions that can be implemented quickly, allowing me to move on to the next problem on my list. i will value my personal time above my working hours, and should a company be overbearing with their need of my time i will look for work somewhere else. while engineering jobs are by nature strenuous, there’s always another company to work at that may value my time as highly as i do, and i will keep an open mind for career development. my mission statement may change from the present, as i try to answer” what gives you joy? what is the source of your joy?” (moreau week 3 – “three key questions” – fr. michael himes but in general by keeping one eye on the future and one on the past i hope to ensure the best for both times. in the following three years this will translate in several ways as follows. in my sophomore year of college i intend to join more student activists group so that i might help “promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity “ (moreau week 10 – “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” – du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame). by helping out where i can, i will be better able to return the good that has been done unto me by passing it forward to someone else. in so doing i hope to work against “networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them”(moreau week 12 – “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross”) as pope francis said “we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.”(week 7 moreau – “why the only future worth building includes everyone” – pope francis). i will also do my best to continue succeeding academically, as a high grade point average is an important part of demonstrating my value on a resume for internships. i hope in my service and hard work in school i can build a better character and by that virtue a better resume. while this seems to be extremely work focused i would argue that bettering oneself goes hand in hand with being more valuable in the eyes of the capitalist machine. in an era where companies can access someone’s entire history i think it’s important to demonstrate the better parts of myself where i can, and in doing so reinforce good behavior. later in sophomore year i intend to be a meaningful member of the notre dame rocketry team. while i was certainly a member this year, i lacked the skills required to properly design or build parts, and i didn’t necessarily see value in spending my club time writing safety reports in the range of hundreds of pages. i believe this club will be more of a personal development for skills that i wish to have. working with teams and learning how to successfully implement ideas while incorporating advice, feedback, and general input from others is something i struggle with, so hopefully i will be able to better learn how to do these things in the coming years. in junior year i hope to continue the good habits that i began in my prior years of schooling, but with certain additional steps towards success that may or may not pan out. my first move will be looking for on campus research to further my knowledge in the field of aerospace engineering. despite starting the search at a reasonable time, i know there are limited research spots and that i might not like any open ones, so i will be open to other avenues of professional development. at this point i will also hope to be a core member of the marching band, as i will be old enough and don’t mind coming out a few days earlier. i enjoy leadership positions because i like to ensure that things are being run “right”, though i can acknowledge that it’s “right” by my definition, and i have in fact been wrong about what is “right” in the past. at the end of junior year i intend to push for several leadership positions in the clubs that i’ll be in. i’ll be a four year member of band, rocketry team, and irishsat. of these three i believe i will push for leadership in band primarily, as i feel like i am most qualified for that position, and i don’t see myself enjoying the other two posts as much as i would being a leader in the band. while this is the worst of the three for resume, i believe as part of my mission that i should prioritize personal values over resume values.. from a leadership position i hope to better the activities i’m in through good judgement and consideration of peer opinions. i know to avoid an echo chamber, “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (moreau week 11 – “how to avoid an echo chamber” – 0:48, dr. paul blaschko) in senior year i hope to put together all of the skills i have learned at notre dame to prepare myself to be a functional adult post college. the year will be filled mainly with applications for internships and the job search for after college. as i progress after college, it’ll be important to remember “there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process.”(moreau week 4 – “navigating your career journey” – meruelo family center for career development) in applying all of my skills i hope to fully realize my potential as a person. i believe that the hardest parts of my journey will be the moments where the easier path is the less righteous one. it’s important to know which direction is the right one, and the allure of an easier option is certainly tempting. if, for example, it’s easier to ignore my responsibilities as a group captain in any club, it’s obviously important that i don’t ignore said responsibilities. further, it may be difficult to keep up my goal grade point average as i progress into harder and harder engineering courses. choosing to study over relax may be hard, but it is obviously going to become a necessity as time goes on. in practicing these self evaluation methods, and through the path laid out above, i hope to live a life well-lived by my own definition. kyle, integration two moreau fye professor taylor 3 december 2021 word count: 1160 truly encountering family when i came to notre dame, i never expected to be thrust so immediately into the community that i now take advantage of. thinking back to just 13 weeks ago, a time when i was starting a brand new journey, traveling north just five hours; but that trip was more than five hours. the drive is five hours and leaving behind my family, the ones who love and care for me. that journey is leaving behind my friends and the situations i was comfortable with. that drive jumping into a new unknown. for the first half of my time here on campus, i really was still getting a feel for everything: the feelings on campus during gameday, the stress in the library approaching finals, the atmosphere of fun and community all around. while my classes have picked up, stress has increased, and the tastes of home during breaks have made it challenging, the people i’ve grown close with are there to support me, to help me, and to truly be a family. i have encountered dissonance while at notre dame. throughout high school and especially now at notre dame, i have found myself forcing myself to fight for every grade. i spend lots of time studying and doing work, and with every grade that isn’t quite what i was hoping for i get sad and mad at myself. this has become especially apparent as i approach finals week. in these last few weeks of the semester, as i find myself cramming in papers, projects, quizzes, and assignments, as well as calculating my grades and what i need to get on the final, i find myself thinking that i am a failure when i realize i can’t get an a in a class. but thinking back to the moreau materials, i think of the quotation “many people suffering from imposter syndrome are afraid that if they ask about their performance, their fears will be confirmed.” (elizabeth cox, ted-ed week nine). while i myself have forced myself to understand that it isn’t the end of the world, and that all that matters is that i give it my all, my friends have been an amazing support group to help me through it. studying with them, going through all of it with them, and complaining about our classes with them, has truly made me realize that i am not a failure, helping me to overcome dissonance. i have encountered brokenness at notre dame. i have been beat down by the papers and tests, the looming fear of grades not being what i hope for them to be. sometimes i find it challenging when i look to the future and know that i still have the rest of undergraduate school, then medical school, then residency, before i can have the job i dream to have, especially when there’s the threat of failure at each step. the feeling that i won’t make it almost breaks me, but then i think of the quotation “even if the spirit brought you here, the world did not make it easy to arrive.” (fr. jenkins seminary commencement address week 10). this quote elucidates the two-front dynamic of achieving your goals, the optimistic side that the holy spirit is guiding you through life, and the more pessimistic idea that the world is constantly giving challenges to stop you, and to break your spirit. with this, i realize that what i must do is focus on the optimistic side, to focus on the fun times with my friends, to focus on the good grades i’ve gotten and the fact that i’m at the greatest university on the face of the earth (in my unbiased opinion). with a good attitude, and my friends around me, i can overcome brokenness. i have encountered community at notre dame. thinking now about how far i’ve come, going from being shy and introverted in high school to surrounded by so many meaningful friends, i often wonder how i have gotten here. parker j. palmer puts it best, “community is not a goal to be achieved but a gift to be received.” (parker j. palmer week 11). i have been gifted with the friendship of my sectionmates. having gotten close to them all from the beginning, my roommate and good friend alex, my late-night-section-lounge-talk best friend collin, and all of the others, i feel we have had this time to form our community. i have also been lucky enough to meet so many others outside of my hall, especially the massive friend group consisting of us keough 4b guys, a dozen girls from lewis, their friends from lyons and pw, i now have all of these friends that i am so thankful for, because this community i have formed truly is a gift. because of the amazing people around me, i truly have been able to embrace community. i have encountered hope at notre dame. “everything works out in the end,” (, qqc week 12). that is what i told you, professor taylor, for my work, but it is also what i told myself. this was before things got hard, before i had to overcome the most recent challenges and trials of dissonance and brokenness. but in just a few weeks, i will be at home, having completed my first semester at the university of notre dame, having finished my first week of finals, having been done with 1/8th of my undergraduate college experience. to me, it is crazy to think about how far i’ve come; time has flown by so fast and no matter how many people tell me it will, it still catches me by surprise. when thinking about my tribulations, i must remember, “human life is only a long way of the cross. it is not necessary to enter the chapel or the church to run over the various situations.” (conference to sisters at st. laurent, holy cross and christian education week 12). just as is being said in this quotation, no matter what happens (i am going to say it again, because i will say it to myself over and over again, as many times as i need to), everything will work out in the end. i have completed a semester at notre dame, i have earned good grades, and i have made the closest of friends. things look hopeful. with all that i have experienced since starting my journey at notre dame, it is clear to me that it is my friends that have helped me every step of the way. my friends have helped me overcome dissonance, and overcome brokenness. my friends have helped me embrace community and become hopeful. with all that my friends have done for me, i truly know that they are more than friends. the people that i surround myself with everyday have become my family. so, for today’s inspirational moment of the day, i admit that i truly have encountered family. professor chan moreau first year experience – integration 3 4 march 2022 the guideline of death eulogies are some of the most interesting things in our lives; a mixture of words and sentiments for a person’s life, not given but until the end. you have no say in your own eulogy, at least not while it is being written. it is a meaningless piece of writing, really, coming into existence after its most impacted person is already gone. so why do we care so much about our own eulogies? because, in some ways, each of our eulogies are constantly being written throughout our entire lives. every word spoken, every action taken, and even every relationship formed affects this short speech. a eulogy showcases the highs of a person’s life, while acknowledging the lows as well. it is the full measure of everything a person has accomplished in their lives, and when done well, it is a marker of a life well-lived. although a eulogy cannot be written until after death, through self-reflection and mindfulness we can seek to use its concept as a guideline for our lives. this reflection is not easy, especially in a world where “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded changing with every microsecond” ("why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted) – moreau fye week 1). still, if we can find a way to slow down, calm ourselves, and look at the true state of our lives, this practice of self-reflection can provide a path for the eventual eulogy. in addition to this reflection, a path can be drawn by role models, inspirations for our lives. as father hesburgh said, “it is easier to exemplify values than teach them” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). this quote from notre dame’s former president perfectly exemplifies the necessity for role models, people who can provide the example of values which are most important to a life well-lived. the greatest role model in my life comes in the form of my grandfather, a man who has persevered through so much, all while continuing to work hard and maintain a positive view of life. through both self-reflection and exemplification from role models, a guideline to life well-lived, and therefore to the words of a eulogy, can be discerned. in my own life, my eulogy will be focused on the impact i made in the world, in the relationships i created and the people whose lives i improved. as such, the field of study to which i subscribe cannot be judged by the salary or the benefits i receive. “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you” ("navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) – moreau fye week 4). throughout the semester, this quote seemed to speak to me, especially when i worried about whether my path was truly the best. it helped to realize, though, that the major i choose will not be the focal point of my eulogy; rather, the values i hold and those that people see in my life will hold the most weight. this principle came up heavily within my discussion with my parents as both of them noted how important fairness and justice were to me (discernment conversation activity – moreau fye week 5). these two ideals are critical aspects of what i want to be written in my eulogy; that i was a fair and compassionate person who sought justice at each and every turn. i also want to be known as an introspective person, one who can admit when they are wrong and can be self-aware enough to change it. this introspection certainly has drawbacks, as “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) – moreau fye week 6). however, when done correctly, i believe that introspection is one of the most powerful traits a person can have in order to create a life well-lived and couldn’t imagine many better aspects of life to be included in a eulogy. yet, none of these traits are more important than the relationships i will form with others throughout my life. just as thomas merton said, “we discover our true selves in love,” i believe the true importance of my life will be found in the love of others ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" (fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart) – moreau fye week 7). therefore, as it relates to my eulogy, i want nothing more than to be remembered for the lasting impact i had on others, through my relationships with them. this love will be the core part of my eulogy, showing my true self, but also improving people’s lives around me. at some point my life will end. i won’t have a perfect life, either, as “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" (ruth graham, ny times) – moreau fye week 3). however, when these days of suffering come, i find contentment in knowing that my eulogy is being written through my actions. i cannot truly write it when i die, but i am able to determine how it is written. as a result, my eulogy will display the fairness that is so important to me, along with showcasing the introspection which has become such a critical aspect of my life. more importantly, it will emphasize the relationships i had, the bonds i forged with others, and the impacts i was able to make on their lives as a direct result of those relationships. in truth, the concept of a eulogy is a guideline, much like the role models and the self-reflection that create the path to the eulogy. this eulogy may change, as may the values i currently hold, but as i grow and become the person i want to be, it will guide me toward living a life well-lived. mahoney 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 10102 29 april 2022 a life well-lived in becoming love this semester’s course material has allowed me to better reflect, and in turn, define my purpose and responsibility to myself, my family, notre dame, and the world around me. i believe my personal mission is to become the love that god has shown for me and to lead others to this same love. god sent his beloved son to die on the cross for me, despite my brokenness, and as such, i hold dearly the calling to extend this love to others as it was extended to me. in defining my personal mission statement, i had to turn inward and reflect on what mattered most to my individual character and to the person who i want to become. however, finding a moment to pause and to reflect is difficult to come by in our fast-paced world. we are being fed so much information and being pulled so many ways by differing narratives, it makes it hard to define one’s presence in the world around them. in week 1, we read a ted talk article by pico iyer, in which he said, “the sabbath recalls to us that, in the end, all our journeys have to bring us home” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fys week 1). this is a reminder to never lose sight of where one comes from by not allowing oneself to be caught in the rat-race of life. most importantly, i ought to reflect on how i am being a force for good in our world actively seeking to become the love through which i was created. furthermore, i also had to look for inspiration in defining my personal mission statement. in week 2, i had the opportunity to watch the film hesburgh, recounting the life of our school’s former president and all that he was able to accomplish in his time here on earth ("hesburgh" by https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 mahoney 2 jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fys week 2). as i was presented with the opportunity to tour his office a short while ago, all the memorabilia served as a reminder of his reach and his inability to remain complacent with the status quo. in a similar way, i ought to model my life after this and make the most out of my remaining three years here at notre dame. i believe i do this through taking the road less travelled, whether that be pushing myself to succeed in the classroom and sibc or finding new avenues of self-mastery such as serving as duncan hall’s liturgical commissioner and on duncan hall’s welcome week committee. in doing so, i gain an immense deal of wisdom from looking to men like fr. ted hesburgh for inspiration in living out my mission statement of becoming the love god has shown me. an incredibly valuable resource i have used in determining my calling in life is fr. michael himes’s three key questions ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes – moreau fys week 3). his simple formula has allowed me to formulate a clearer picture of where god wants me to be and where my journey can take me. himes asks about any career, is it a source of joy, are you good at it, and does it fulfill a genuine need in the community? in reflecting upon my personal mission, i can apply this logic to my intended degree in finance, my budding interest in the priesthood, or even a career in the u.s. military. in my next three years here, i ought to ask this of all my endeavors to ensure my notre dame education and experience is being used as an expression of love towards others. there exists a temptation, however, in the pursuit of career discernment to dedicate oneself to a strict purpose too early in life, disregarding the vast opportunities available to oneself. i believe every person owes it to themselves to explore a variety of paths, or as the undergraduate career services’ article framed it, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” ("navigating your career journey moreau https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/472889?module_item_id=146789 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ mahoney 3 first year experience course" by undergraduate career services – moreau fys week 4). despite being a dedicated finance major, i strive to diversify my efforts to develop myself into a more well-rounded person. in my mission to be become god’s love for me, i have been an active member of the leprechaun legion executive board, showing love for notre dame in the way of school spirit and supporting our athletic teams in their endeavors. one of, if not the singular most useful exercise from this semester was the career discernment activity, in which i was able to speak with my brother about what he perceives to be my strengths and weaknesses and about how my influence has impacted him ("discernment conversation activity" – moreau fys week 5). in my attempt to live out my personal mission statement, this was incredibly resourceful because he was able to provide me with honest feedback regarding my demonstrated expressions of outward love. one example he pointed out was my steadfast commitment to utilizing all the resourceless i have been blessed with by god. he described my involvement with student council, habitat for humanity, and other service projects throughout high school. animated by my personal mission statement, i desire to attain this level of involvement here at notre dame. in accordance with others observing my efforts to be an expression of outward love, i too hold the responsibility to think critically about my actions in relation to the world around me. this practice is known as introspection, and while i find it incredibly useful, it must be utilized properly for it to be effective. as we read, “this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves. and, in a few cases, they’ve even found the opposite: the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich phd – moreau fys week 6). because i value my personal mission statement so highly, i spend https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ mahoney 4 extensive amounts of time reflecting on whether i am on the track to attaining it. this can sometimes lead to only focusing on the negative that i have caused, which is a nearsighted vision of the full impact i can and have had on my peers. i desire to get into the daily habit of guided meditation, so that i may allow an introspective outlook on my experiences to animate the fulfillment of my mission statement in practice. integral to my personal mission is the belief that all people deserve, as god’s creation, to be cared for and treated with dignity. fr. greg boyle, s.j. describes this sentiment perfectly in his selected reading for this course, saying, “except for the fact that we all need to see that we are in each other’s “jurisdictions,” spheres of acceptance – only, all the time. and yet, there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude. allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” ("tattoos on the heart chapter 8" by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fys week 7). in my journey to become the love through which i was created, i must dismantle any unjust barriers between myself and others. in this spirit, i want to become more involved with diversity and inclusion efforts around campus. whether it be alan george’s “thirsty for culture thursdays” or engaging with broader movements across the university, this is an integral part of fulfilling my calling to be a force for good in the world. though i was not required to write the qqc reflection for moreau fys week 8 because of my victory in jeopardy earlier this year, i still trust that there is significant suffering in the world and that i must structure my actions to resolve injustice as i see it. even despite fr. greg boyle s.j.’s powerful writing about accepting all humanity in our jurisdiction, we can’t fully trust that others are worthy of love if we don’t first believe ourselves to be worthy of god’s grace too. this was highlighted well in jacob’s walsh’s article, “growing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844?module_item_id=167972 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844?module_item_id=167972 mahoney 5 up gay and catholic,” in which he described struggling to understand that he could be loved, even in spite of his perceived sin of being homosexual ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh – moreau fys week 9). if we consider, however, our brokenness to exclude us from god’s jurisdiction, then the brokenness of others would hinder them from participating in it too. in my time at notre dame, i will encounter people from all walks of life. i may have my ideological differences from them, but i must remind myself that we are all called to share in the same reunification, achieved for us through christ’s death on the cross. this includes the trend towards deep polarization, as discussed by dr. paul blashcko, a teacher of philosophy here at notre dame ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fys week 10). when faced with these situations in which i disagree with another, i turn to john 8:7, which says, “… let the one among you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” i recognize that no matter the totality of my sins or that of my neighbor’s, god is love and mercy, and through him, we all have a path to salvation. i additionally have no problem admitting that i come from a place of immense privilege when discussing injustice, as i have lived a very generous life. this, however, only compounds my responsibility to serve as a voice for those who have none. dean of notre dame’s law school, g. marcus cole, describes this attitude immensely well in his now renowned article which we had the chance to read earlier in moreau this semester ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something." by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fys week 11). if i am truly to become the love that i aspire to be, i must reflect this passion in all i say, speak, and do. in cole’s words, “i can do something,” and with this resolve, i am called to ensure all my notre dame brothers and sisters experience my loving presence. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ mahoney 6 no matter the words written on paper, my personal mission to embody the love through which i was formed cannot be complete without action ("writing a personal mission statement activity" – moreau fys week 13). accordingly, everything i’ve written here today must be expressed outward toward my neighbor, modelled after the love through which christ willingly died on the cross for my chance at salvation. i have full faith and confidence that god will guide me to where i need to be in my lifelong journey, but i must walk the path with him through righteous word and deed. only then can i truly say that i have pursued a life well-lived and have fulfilled my ultimate commitment to becoming god’s love for me and for all. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit outta time i stood at the corner of broad street and maple avenue, squinting through my camera’s viewfinder as an empty lot quickly came to life. suddenly, a pair of led headlights shined through my lens: the high-tech, adrenaline-inducing lamborghini performante marked its entrance with a v10 symphony. fifty other supercars followed as if i were in a blissful dream, but this was the very real red bank cars and coffee. as i conversed with the drivers at rbcc after they pulled into the parking lot, i was able to forge meaningful connections that transcended race, age, wealth, and even our interest in cars—simple conversations eventually developed into more personal ones. while this recollection of my experiences at a local car show describes a relatively short occasion from my life, it offers a glimpse into the experiences that shaped who i am and how i would like to be remembered as a person who seeked to connect with people based on the commonalities i had with them, and furthered those connections as time progressed. by being “willing to listen to different opinions; [and] not strong in [my] own belief” as well as being able to “bridge different ideologies” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca, christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) when my values conflicted with others, i strived toward a mutual respect for everyone and their opinions. through sharing my past experiences and values with others at notre dame, i not only have acclimated myself into the student body here, but i also developed a close friend group where my friends and i can share our genuine thoughts with each other. learning about father hesburgh’s way of life and the respect that he garnered from everyone he spoke to is something i certainly aspire to eventually be, and i am optimistic that my approach to interacting with others will develop a solid foundation for me to do so. even though my interactions with others and my goals of being remembered as someone that was outgoing and respectable have brought me happiness here at notre dame, i have always subconsciously felt some obstacles in the path to a life well-lived. because of the standards i set for myself by looking at the achievements of those around me, i always felt that i had little time to work towards even matching what they have accomplished (hence my choice for an epitaph reading “outta time;” both as a reference to the back to the future trilogy as well as to be remembered by deprecating humor that communicates my constant chase towards my goals.) through dr. jihoon kim’s self-reflection after his life-changing injury though, i understood the importance of being grateful for what i am fortunate to have rather than constantly looking to others and what they had but i lacked (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). similarly, talking with my close friend about myself (week 5) revealed what i felt hindered me from “happiness”: that i am the biggest limiting factor to my own success because of the high expectations that i set for myself. my close friend helped me realize that i downplay my capabilities when i look down on myself and that i instead should be more mindful of how i set my goals and be more appreciative and acknowledging of the things that i have been able to do so far at notre dame. father michael hime’s statement that “‘satisfaction is a lowly thing, how pure a thing is joy.” contentment is an obstacle, [but] joy always pushes us forward” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3) makes it clear to me that i should not seek temporary satisfaction to live a life well-lived, but instead pursue joy, which has a more lasting impact both on my happiness and motivation to achieve my goals. as such, i feel that learning to set more long-term goals with tangible results is what i should do when seeking career prospects as well. thus, learning that a career fit for me is one that allows for me to “implement as many parts of my self-concept as possible” instead of “focusing only on skill” (navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career dev. week 4) helped me realign my career interests. it served as an indirect reminder to keep my values in mind when searching for a career path that will allow myself to live a life well lived, one where i can experience joy and not just satisfaction on the occasional basis. in an age where most change their careers every few years, i have also come to understand the importance of focusing on myself and my personal development in order to feel fulfilled at the end of my career, and ultimately, my life. getting the opportunity to reflect on my values and my self-imposed limitations gave me a new idea of where i should direct my career in the future so that i can be happy with where i am in the future. the importance of feeling control and experiencing personal development became even more evident through tasha eurich’s article, where she mentions that those that are high in insight can feel empowered and can overall “enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content” (“the right way to be introspective by tara eurich moreau fye week 6). eurich’s article forced upon me the importance of feeling that i have a proper balance over all aspects of my life, since i constantly feel pressed for time with impending deadlines despite my time management skills. as such, this quote helped validate the decision i made to focus less directly on my academics but with my own personal being as well (i.e. through spending more time with friends and by going to the gym more often. i understood that being a more well-rounded individual that is in touch with the world around me is as well as being able to speak on my experiences when interacting with others (such as in a working environment) are more important than having a perfect gpa (while doing well in all my classes is of course still a high priority). overall, i have come to learn that to comprehend a life well lived, i need to see my impact on others beyond having simple conversations with them. pope francis makes it clear that we can and should “become a bright candle, [amidst the darkness of conflict]” and serve as a “reminder [to others] that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). seeing how we can improve the lives of others by simply being there for them in times of stress epitomizes living a life well lived since a life well lived involves embarking on a “journey that brings us home” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). our guidance to others is clearly valuable for both us and them, since we guide others on the path to a good life while also journeying towards a good life ourselves. ultimately, while my epitaph may read “outta time,” it is now my life goal to skew that negative humor into positivitythat i didn’t have enough time to improve the world. week 8 intregration 3 geiger 1 mr. anthony polotto moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 eulogizing the life of was a man who left us too soon and had so much more to accomplish in his life. while there are so many different ways in which i can describe my friend, i would first call him incredibly insightful. zach was always able to provide incredibly astute advice to anyone who asked for or needed his help. he would always put aside anything that he was doing to offer his support to anyone in need. zach created so many close relationships with others because he was so willing to support others through their endeavors in life. this is not, however, surprising because dr. eurich explains, “people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). zach was an individual who enjoyed deep, long-lasting friendships because of his insight. he understood that one of his primary callings from god was to put others first and, in this way, he was enriching himself. zach was truly a great communicator like so many other giants of our society. zach found great inspiration from former notre dame president father ted hesburgh. he tried to, in part, live his life in a way that would mirror the actions and thought processes of father ted. “ted was a bridge-builder between people and god and among people” (“hesburgh film” moreau fye week 2). i like to think that zach was a similar type of bridge-builder. he was also the most level head in the room and was able to bridge the divide not only between his https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 geiger 2 friends, but also between colleagues at school and at work. i remember a situation last year at school that perfectly shows how zach was able to bridge divisions. we were working in a group project to determine the role that democracy plays in the growth of civil society. two students had different ideas of democracy’s role and were arguing quite intensely about their ideas. zach simply said that there is no perfect answer, and we should include both in the project. while it seems like such a simple solution, zach understood that all ideas contributed a speck of truth to the conversation in one way or another. zach’s dedication to resolving dilemmas on top of all his other commitments kept him busy; however, he was never deterred by the rapid pace of his daily life. zach always knew how to unwind from the stress of his daily life. he believed that relaxation was an essential component of leading a successful life. this is because it is “precisely those who are busiest . . . who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). zach worked very hard throughout the day; however, he was always done working by ten in the evening. he took that time before bed to spend time with his friends, watch netflix, or go to mass. the most important thing was that this time was spent for leisure. in general, beyond leisure, zach was able to remain calm under pressure and go with the flow. zach trusted that any situation that he was experiencing in his life would improve. he furthermore was rarely stressed about having his life planned out perfectly; instead, he believed that his life would end up working itself out, as it always does. zach was studying political science at the university of notre dame before he passed. even though he did not know what type of job he wanted with his major, he was fascinated by the way that politics functions and affects the united states. even though many people told him that he needed to pick a major that https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ geiger 3 guaranteed job security, zach believed that, “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). zach thought that he might want to work in government or continue on to law school following his undergraduate graduation. that being said, zach’s ideas for a career following college were very fluid, and he was still trying to figure out his path in life. although many people tried to pressure zach into choosing a more “useful” major, his grandpa always supported him in any of his decisions. zach was closer to his grandpa than anyone else in the world. “[his] grandpa [had] always been the person that [he could] rely on most to give [him] advice” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week 5). it cannot be overstated that zach and his grandpa had an unbreakable bond; the two of them were invested in each other and could always have a conversation no matter what was happening. they called one another just about every day, consulted one another with problems, and trusted in the advice that was given. his grandpa will truly miss the conversations, friendship, and love that they shared because zach genuinely represented the best in all of us. words cannot begin to describe the pain that we all feel today as a result of zach’s passing. yet, zach lived his life to the fullest. he understood that “life is not time merely passing by; life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). zach truly took this mantra to heart. as i said early, zach found meaning in his life first by helping others, and, by supporting others, zach was able to find satisfaction in his own life. it was not only friends and acquaintances that gave zach meaning; instead, his grandpa was the person that zach confided in most as he continued on his life https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript geiger 4 journey. even though zach is greatly missed by everyone in attendance today, let us all have solace in knowing that zach knew that he was going to be okay, even in death. zach had an unwavering trust that he would be guided into heaven as he died. he was acutely aware that his death was imminent, yet he had come to terms with his passing because “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). zach was ready; he wanted to meet his maker and be reunited with all those who had passed away before him. before he died, zach wanted everyone here to know that he will be watching over you all forever and is in a much better place now. he asked that you would all smile because he wants his life to be remembered by the beautiful memories, not the sad ending. zach lives in all of our hearts; that can never be taken away, even in death. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html appreciation of the simple things, a eulogy for was new jersey through and through. born in vorhees in 2003, his heart never strayed far from the dense suburbs and charming hostility of the garden state. a natural test taker, he excelled academically in his younger years. a member of many extracurriculars, he became marching band captain by junior year with leadership positions in nhs and student government. pushing through a global pandemic and forty-hour work shifts he graduated one of three valedictorians in 2021. even at this age, jack had his eyes on the future. his father had done his best to instill a hard work ethic, and some of the lessons had stuck while others fell to the wayside. through his academics and a perfect act score, jack managed to secure a spot in the notre dame class of 2025. the notre dame experience was initially a sub-par one. the people were entirely different from those he had left at home, and the university fell short on several expectations. despite this culture shock, jack managed to get decent grades in his major courses and found some friends to match those he had back home. his experiences in the rocketry club and irishsat were instrumental in his journey towards the workforce. graduating from college, jack moved into the aerospace startup industry at a company called momentus. here, he designed the advanced propulsion systems that would carry hundreds of satellites to their correct orbits. during this time, he also started a family, first marrying his long-term girlfriend, then settling down with two kids and two dogs. throughout his life, he would always try to teach his kids the important lessons, while letting them figure out their day to day on their own. while he didn’t hold them to the same academic standard he had once been held to, he still made sure that they were preparing for a successful future. family vacations were a near constant event in the kornicki household, as satellite launches brought jack across the country. during the summer he would make extra provisions to bring his kids along as well. memorable trips to florida, texas, and even rocket firing ranges out in the desert would stick in his kids’ memory as they grew older and had less time for their dad’s work trips. his kids inherited his intense memory for useless information, and they exceeded every expectation he had for them. in his later years jack took a steadier position as a team head at nasa to prepare for retirement. as the advancements in the field began to outpace his aging education, he became more open to suggestions from the younger teammates and employees. after a few years of this he passed the torch to another worker, and peacefully retired back to new jersey. in his final years he took as many hobbies as could be expected, learning to do all the things he never had time for as a younger man. when his time came, he went peacefully in his sleep, his wife by his side. jack is remembered by his children and his grandchildren, who praise his laid-back approach to parenting and cherish the memories they made when they were younger. they remember his passion for learning and willingness to embrace change even if it means admitting he was wrong. he wasn’t a perfect man, but he was always trying to be better. he will be missed. in imagining my future eulogy, i faced numerous questions about what i want people to think about me when i die. “what do i want to do?”, “how many kids do i want to have?”, “how honest about myself should i be?”, all questions that crossed my mind as i wrote. i ultimately settled on a simple life, as i don’t have any grand ambitions for the world or my place in it. as quoted in his pico iyer’s ted talk “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.” (why we need to slow down our livespico iyers – moreau fye week one). though i won’t lie and say i don’t plan to enjoy all of the modern comforts of daily life, i will say that most unhappiness comes from the feeling of always wanting more. i intend to live a life where i am satisfied, not working myself to death in the search of a higher paycheck. while i admire the animated spirit of people like, say, father hesburgh, who constantly urged those around him that in terms of helping people “they weren’t doing enough” (hesburgh movie jerry barca – moreau week two), i know that grand sweeping actions aren’t for me. if i’m remembered fondly, it will be for little things that i did, day to day. it is here where i downright disagree with a moreau text, specifically that “’satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy.’ contentment is an obstacle.” (“three key questions” marianne moore quoted by michael himes – moreau fye week 3). this distaste for one who is content with their life goes completely against my goal of no longer needing to waste all of my time striving for meaningless accomplishments. while i understand their idea that idleness in life can be bad, i completely disagree that idleness is equated with satisfaction and contentment. further, the idea that someone’s calling is to work until they literally drop dead “six feet under that is,” (“three key questions” michael himes – moreau fye week 3) is appalling to someone who wants to spend their last few years relaxing. if forced to boil major life decisions into three components, i would much prefer the approach favored by the notre dame undergraduate career services, as they suggest people first “learn about yourself” then “study what you enjoy and get involved”, and then finally to “explore careers” (“navigating your career journeynotre dame center for career development – moreau fye week 4). this enjoyment-based system ensures that regardless of starting talent, one learns to do what they want to do, and works where they want to work. it was through a similar process that i came to choose aerospace engineering for my major, and i hope this material helps others navigate the treacherous waters of major discernment. it is possible that a discernment conversation with a peer could also help, one where questions like “what do you think i most value and desire in life?” or “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?”(“moreau fye_week five_discernment conversation activity_sp22” moreau curriculummoreau fye week five) could be asked and answered earnestly. in doing so one could learn about what they can’t discern about themselves, and thus they can be better prepared to search for a job. once a career path is defined, it can be easy to fall to obstacles on the road to being happy, as shown in week 6 of this course. in particular, self-reflection without purpose was shown to actually be detrimental to one’s happiness, as “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed, and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” tasha eurich – moreau week six). this counterintuitive idea, the article argues, shows that in order to properly reflect, one must have the goal of attaining self-insight. instead of asking why something happened, we should instead ask what happened, and work from there, as asking why can cause negative emotions. i personally think this article is a complete misunderstanding of self-reflection, as the idea of negative feelings being a “bad” outcome seems misguided at best. self-reflection can cause negative emotions, and often will, but i believe that instead of shifting our entire process to avoid feeling bad about ourselves, we should instead take note of what makes us feel bad, and aim to improve in those areas. while fixating solely on the why can lead to a depressive state, i believe it is essential to at least ask why before moving on to brighter more forward leaning questions. the pope offers some of these forward leaning questions when he discusses the hardships other face, namely “why them and not me” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francismoreau week seven). this is the most important question i think can be asked, because it reveals that there is no real difference between those that are fortunate in life and those that aren’t. while all manner of excuses can be made for why someone is or isn’t successful, everything boils down to effort and luck, but mostly luck. the world is generally unfair, and the question “why them and not me” rarely has an answer other than luck, and i think that’s key to appreciating what one has for what it is, a blessing. moreau integration 3 final draft simply live simple wesley harris of glastonbury, connecticut loved his family and friends, his community, and his work. in all of these aspects of his life, he sought to fulfill his greater obligation of service to others, and worked to ensure that he fulfilled each one of his god-given vocations. wesley often talked about how he would easily become sidetracked and distracted, as he tended to fill his life with several different hobbies and interests. however, all of these hobbies and interests were enhanced when done with those he loved, like his family and his friends. although it was easy to become distracted from these things, he always seemed to remember and prioritized what mattered mostrelationships. although he was studious and spent a lot of time studying away from friends, he always seemed to put in the extra work for the sake of buying time in the future for friends and family. much of what was pressing in his life was urgent, but was not always important. as time went on, he did a better job at distinguishing between the two, and always ensured his loved ones that they were important above everything else. one quote that wesley seemed to live by in this regard goes as follows: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). wesley was involved with many different things, but always tried to step back from them in order to gain a better look at what he valued the most through the things that may have distracted him. he always made time for social events and other gatherings, and although he was a self-described introvert, he gained his energy from the company of others on most occasions. wesley always talked about how grateful he was for his parents and sister, who formed him and taught him how to “step farther back.” in terms of family, wesley felt a deep calling toward selflessness. in this way, his vocation in this area of his life was most fulfilled when he performed acts of service. these acts of service were what connected wesley and his family, and formed a sense of mutual trust and love. since this vocation to serve his family was his top priority, wes adopted a life philosophy that could be summed up in the following quote: “one vocation embraces all our other vocations: to be a human being. we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we can possibly be!” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). in his constant–and often difficult–effort to cultivate these virtues, wes ultimately hoped to draw himself more in line with what it means to be a christian son and brother. along with his family and friends, wes valued his community and always sought to fulfill his obligation to be a stewardly neighbor to others. he loved his hometown of glastonbury and was highly involved with community events and local government. his love for his hometown extended not only to the natural aspects, like the parks and forests, but to everyone he encountered. he always tried to greet every stranger with a smile, as he viewed his community as a broader extension of his family. wes wasn’t very interested in politics on a national level, and instead focused on cultivating local connection and understanding. in this way, he believed in the power of individuals within the community to build up a better culture and atmosphere. pope francis–whom wes looked up to throughout his life as a source of inspiration and hope–stated the following quote, which seems to have guided wes throughout his interactions with his community: “the future of humankind isn't exclusively in the hands of politicians, of great leaders, of big companies. yes, they do hold an enormous responsibility. but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). while national politics and other polarizing topics pulled people apart, wes firmly believed that the greatest influence on society and its practices came from people with complex worldviews and emotions, not companies or political parties which often over-simplified issues and categorized individuals based on single aspects of their lives or beliefs. wes’ “us” included not just those he liked, or even those he met, but everyone in his town and community. he believed that the first step toward improving the community was loving it unconditionally, which necessarily meant adopting a mindset of “us” instead of just me and “you.” throughout his time in glastonbury, wes mainly cared about conservation efforts with local trails and open spaces, as well as with historical structures. his childhood dream was to serve on the town council in some capacity, which he eventually realized later on in his life. he loved old homes, and believed that the town character came from its unique history instead of new developments. he was often jokingly called an “old man” even in his teenage years, but his love for history drew him closer to the community throughout his life, as he wished to preserve what made the town special. although sometimes this attitude of preservation bumped up against efforts to modernize the town and perhaps add more shops and homes, he always managed to consider the viewpoints of the other side. he loved preservation, but hated arguments even more. his time at notre dame familiarized him with many different figures, but none so influential as fr. hesburgh. in his discussions with community members, wes looked toward fr. hesburgh as a source of inspiration. “[fr. hesburgh] could talk across differences and create trust, create a mutual understanding. that’s the kind of leader we need today” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). just as fr. hesburgh could connect with the other side of a dispute, wes found ways to bridge the gap between himself and those who disagreed with him. he believed that no one was ever truly completely and totally in disagreement, and often tried to find common ground as a means of compromise. he wasn’t always good at it and was the first to admit so, but tried to reflect fr. hesburgh’s traits to the best of his ability. humor was also a means of mutual understanding which he tried to employ as often as possible. wesley’s career path began after his graduation from notre dame in 2025, although he never truly settled with one single career. throughout college, wes talked extensively with friends and family about what jobs would suit him, as he had a hard time answering this question himself. he loved to try new things and became burned out in certain activities, so the idea of choosing one job was daunting at first. however, his mother, amy harris, helped guide him throughout college and the years after while he figured it out. wes would always discuss how fruitful their conversations were, and the idea that his mother seemed to know his skills and interests better than he did. part of this had to do with the fact that he had a tendency to gravitate toward the wrong questionsthat is, trying to figure out the psychology and reasoning behind his own interests and talents instead of simply accepting them and figuring out what the next step ought to be. in their discussions, amy utilized the following quote to help wes move away from these sorts of unanswerable questions: ““why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). after many of these discussions, wes began to notice a pattern. he was seen by others as someone with great writing and speaking skills, and was a good problem solver. his empathy was a strength as well, and could put himself in the shoes of others in order to grow closer to them and help them through any sort of issue (discernment conversation moreau week fye week 5). as a result of this, wes eventually decided to pursue a career in law, defending people who had been sentenced under the death penalty. wes wished to incorporate his faith into his work, and he believed he could do this to the best of his ability by serving those whom society deemed the most irredeemable and disposable. although this work took up much of his time, he always made sure to make time for leisure. he enjoyed visiting antique stores and thrifting, and had a side hobby of selling these types of items online on his own shop. he enjoyed managing this website, as it allowed him to express creativity and pursue his passion of art and design. this constant balance between his more creative work and his more practical work hinged on his belief in exploring all aspects of one’s interests. this belief was first formed when he was deciding his career path early on in college, as he needed time for leisure in order to carry out deeper introspection. the following quote describes his thoughts: “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo career center moreau fye week 4). through hiking, he discovered his love for nature; through antiquing and thrifting, he discovered his love for design and art, as well as his love for small businesses and the vital role they play in the community; and through the instruments he played, he discovered his love for music. none of these discoveries came about through long sessions of isolated introspection, but through simply living. it was this practice of simply living without trying to think too hard about the motivations behind each action or the greater personality implications that wes enjoyed most. in short, wesley harris enjoyed simply living simple. citation links week 1: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week 3: https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 week 4: https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/ edit?usp=sharing week 6: https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript integration three nyugen moreau first year experience 22 february 2022 a life best-spent i always spent time with those whom i cared about. i made it a priority, throughout my life, to build connections and relationships with those whom i felt connected to as a result of similar and dissimilar experiences throughout my lifetime. living in a life during a time period marked by great technological growth, i found time to take myself away from the screen in order to spend time with my kids and wife, while also being an active member of the community in which i lived (wherever that may be). during my time at notre dame, i became aware of the “many in silicon valley [who] observe an “internet sabbath” every week, during which they turn off most of their devices from, say, friday night to monday morning” (“why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). it was during this time (the weekends), where i was able to spend the most meaningful time with my family: coaching sports teams, helping my kids with school, and spending time outside of the office with my family, a lot like his father before him. however, those who knew me knew that i was never afraid to be myself, regardless of what others may have thought. i understood that, to live a life well-lived, i had to take in the advice of those around me (parents, friends, or even professors) while also never being afraid to create my own path. father ted, former president of notre dame who, “did a lot of things that were not very priestly” was still able to be highly regarded in the congregation of holy cross as a priest, but also in every other facet of his life (“ hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week 2). i, similarly, was somewhat unorthodox in my methods as a result of my education at notre dame, which led me to think deeply about my actions while also remaining true to myself. part of this thinking process was derived from michael himes, who claimed that there were three things to consider with respect to making life decisions: “1) do you get a kick out of it? 2) are you any good at it? 3) does anyone want you to do it?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). without these three questions from himes, my life would most likely have stayed the same course because i almost always answered these questions subconsciously as a result of the way i was raised as well as my education at notre dame. my main use of these three questions was discerning a career, which at first i thought was going to be a doctor, but instead chose a career in finance. i chose this because i wanted to balance my lifestyle with success in a field as well as satisfaction with it; i understood that “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). with respect to finance, i felt that my enjoyment in the field as well as the time i was able to spend with family later in life was a balance that was manageable, yet challenged me to pursue new skills and seek knowledge as well as new opportunities. influenced by family in the field and peers at notre dame, i was able to find helpful resources who helped me build new relationships, both in the office as well as close relationships outside of it. my closest relationship has been my best friend since birth: my sister, morgan. she has indubitably served as my biggest role model while also being my closest friend. throughout my life, she has seen me build (and break) some of the most meaningful relationships in my life, whether it be childhood best friends, girlfriends, or teachers. she understands that, “i value holding strong relationships with others, and that i place what it takes to build those relationships above my own personal values” (by moreau fye week 5). when it came to relationships, i often enjoyed making others feel extremely important to me by completely investing myself into the relationship. i believed that living a life well-lived meant spending time and creating strong relationships by making others feel joy through them. when choosing who to make these relationships with, i often quoted the good samaritan parable that goes as follows: “seeing the injured man lying on the ground...he paid out of his pocket for him to be assisted” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). i never overlooked any person when engaging myself with them, whether the person was a janitor cleaning at midnight or a high level executive of a fortune 500 company, i never disregarded their presence, essentially never choosing to ignore the “injured man lying on the ground” as so many did. also, however, through the means of my work, i too was considered by my community a good samaritan, whether it be through actions or donations. finally, i never took life too seriously by always, as my dad said, “smiling through life.” i clearly understood that too much “introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective” by (tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). while i never impulsively ran through my life, i understood that sometimes some decisions (which may have been stupid) were okay, meaning that i was able to constantly have fun with those around me even if, sometimes, the action did not wholly benefit me. these stories, i believe, are the ones that i want those to remember me for, not for any successes or ideas but the fun stories that are able to bring a smile to the faces of those who hear them when told. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/147011 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146950 you are your greatest critic throughout high school i’ve had a class very similar to moreau called rsb (reflective spiritual being). and it was in those moments in that class did i discover and learn more about myself. often times when we are going about our normal day: going to classes, eating, socializing, studying, and sleeping, we often don’t have that much time dedicated to ourselves. thus, it is those moments when you are by yourself, all alone and reflecting on your life, that you learn the most about yourself, daloz parks. sure, we learn in class with all the new material that we process, but i believe that it is when we are by ourselves, really thinking about who we are, in those short but crucial moments that we grow the most. oftentimes, those thoughts end up leading to sad and emotional destinations, but through those times we are knocked down we get up stronger and better. these experiences have shaped me to become who i am today. deresiewicz (2010) states that “true leadership means being able to think for yourself and act on your convictions.” the convictions that i act on are often those that i discover when i’m all alone by myself. there is a big reason as to why i’m deciding to double major with business analytics and psychology, with an original intention of just majoring in business analytics. back in high school, i realized i loved being the person that people could always reach out to and contact whenever they had any issues regarding their mental state or health. i would often leave my phone ringer on throughout the night just in case one of my friends really needed someone to talk to. and it was this one instance at night when one of my good friends nic called me at 3 am panicking about his mental health. and it was at that moment that i realized i loved helping people, i loved talking to people, and i loved guiding people on what they could do to help their state. but after all this time, i realized that it is so much easier to tell other people what to do than doing it yourself if you were faced with the exact same circumstances, father michael himes – 3 key questions and what am i going to do with my life. this is why i believe that i still have so much more to improve in terms of being a leader. often times i feel so hypocritical of telling people things, that indeed are the best for them, but when it comes to me, i wouldn’t force it upon myself. meaning that i wouldn’t be able to follow through with it myself. and sometimes i feel like that is equivalent with me lying to myself about things when other people tell me other things. for example, my friends from back home and friends here at notre dame did not like my now ex-girlfriend and they all told me that it was extremely toxic and was not good for my health. they all told me they could see with the interactions that they had with me that she was not good for me at all. but i would always lie to myself and convince myself otherwise. i often did this by reminiscing about the good, happy moments i had with her, and that was a terrible coping strategy. but through this experience i’ve been able to learn a lot about myself. discovering that i lie to myself about these things earlier, is always better than discovering that i do this in my later forties. in addition, now that i know i do this, i subconsciously realize that i could be lying to myself and that would also help me make better leadership decisions. it is quite often that when i think of someone who has been a crucial leader in my life, that they don’t think of themselves as acting as a leader. i believe a leader has to be selfless instead of selfish. one that isn’t doing it for his own benefits, but rather for the greater good of other people. one leader that played a big role in my life was my brother. since we are in the same family, he knew exactly how to guide me through the process of high school and now, college. there is this memory that i remember extremely vividly where he was having an argument with my parents during his high school years and he sat me down in my room and put on avatar the last airbender for me to watch and wipe out the loud shouts in the background. but being the child i was, i understood concepts that a normal 8–9-year-old didn’t. i understood that these things could get super violent, and the damages done on our family dynamic couldn’t be repaired. however, my brother, even in the midst of the anger he had inside him was able to do the selfless thing and take care of me and what i was feeling. i hope that one day i could be a fraction of who he is. i’ve come to recognize that i let my emotions get the best of me. in moments of heated argument, it is extremely hard for me to take a step back and evaluate the moment. especially if the person i’m arguing with has extremely flawed logic. however, after growing up and experiencing more events, i’ve understood that arguing with someone is quite pointless. when you argue with someone, no one listens to the other person. thus, now i’ve learned to take a step back from the situation and communicate with the other person when both parties are better suited to talk properly. as days go by, as time passes, as i grow older, i have to do my part in today’s society. there are so many issues that i see go by unnoticed and i believe it is my job to do my part in fixing these situations. there’s this funny poster that are posted all over urinals in china, which translates to: “one small step forward, makes a huge difference”. and i guess all i can do is to take that step forward – but oftentimes that’s the hardest part. integration 1 liebezeit 1 taylor kelly moreau fye 15 october 2021 i’m a believer if you were to ask me last year around this time what i believe i would have stumbled trying to put everything i have learned in my life together in order to form my core values. i knew what it meant to be a good person from what my parents and teachers have taught me. but, now looking back that never really answered the question, what do you believe? it merely took into consideration what i had been taught to believe. from taking 7 weeks of moreau i have learned the importance of forming your own way of thinking. i believe i have deepened my self-knowledge and gone through personal development. here is what i believe. i am not perfect, god is everywhere, and that i should not forfeit my identity in order to please others. throughout my life, i thought i had to be perfect. things like being the best at everything, the smartest in the class, or the most successful child. however, these things are meaningless and do not define who i am as a person. perfection is a weighted term that should not hold any standard in life. i have learned that what it means to be perfect is to not be perfect. in other words, being your authentic self. being authentic to me means being true to yourself and it does not mean you make no mistakes. “out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” (should you live for your resume or your eulogy? by david brooks, morea fye week 2). this quote helped me understand that everyone makes mistakes and important events, good or bad, throughout my life, have shaped me as a person. i believe that we should not dwell on our pasts and use these mistakes to define us. at the end of our lives, people https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim liebezeit 2 do not remember the little mistakes and weaknesses that we possessed but, the qualities that made us great. i saw this even deeper when we took the survey about our character strengths. it showed me that the basic personality features that define my distinctive identity and make me feel authentic, alive, and involved in life do not have to be perfect. the “where i’m from” poem we wrote for week 6 also allowed me to take time and realize what made me, me. “i am enough” (the power of vulnerability by brené brownmoreau fye week 1). being “enough” does not mean being perfect. the feeling of not being enough can weigh a huge burden in life. it prevents us from doing the things we love. therefore, once i began to understand and accept this worthiness, i was able to connect with life more. being vulnerable, having courage, and being willing to share allows people to be true to themselves. and being authentic does not mean perfection. i am not perfect. the next aspect i base a lot of my life on is god. i believe that god is everywhere and that he will always be there. throughout my life, i believed i had a very strong relationship with god. i attended catholic school, went to church every sunday, and even sang in the choir at my church. so, i have a pretty good familiarity with the catholic church and its expectations. i knew that god was always there for me and that he loved me. however, as i began to age and go through my challenges, i lost this relationship. i went through some heartbreaks, lost some of my best friends, and suffered through anxiety and depression. i thought to myself: why would a god who is supposed to care and love me put me through so much pain? why is he allowing me to question my entire faith? if he is real, why can i not see him? i failed to see the meaning of love and what god meant to me. i was very upset with myself for a long time because i was disappointed that i was questioning my faith. i tried to reconnect with my faith by reading and studying the bible, but i still did not feel god’s love. it was not until my school’s kairos retreat https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=3 liebezeit 3 this past year where i finally got some clarity with god. i learned that it was okay to question my faith and that it meant that i cared deeply about it. when i thought of love in action, i thought i was actively supposed to be looking for god. however, kairos showed me just the opposite. god’s love and presence are in everything. “faith invites us to live in the light” (faith brings light to a dark world by professor david fagerbergmoreau fye week 3). instead of searching for god, i recognize that god is everywhere and god is here. just like how in darkness we might not see something but when light shines upon us, everything is revealed. the same way we might stereotype others maybe how we stereotype god. from scripture, we see many images of god but people still believe that god has one distinct quality: a happy guy in a rainbow. “. . . one story [is not] the only story” (danger of a single story by chimamanda ngozi adichiemoreau fye week 7). yes, he wants the best for us, but he will also teach us lessons. god does not have a single story and if we think he does we are in danger of not fully recognizes our faith. god is in everything and for everyone. i believe that when i see god having many different qualities the same way i see that in the people around me, i can dive deeper into my faith. and it is then that i see god everywhere. lastly, i believe now more than ever that i should not forfeit my identity in order to please others. the people we chose to have in our lives should make us feel wanted and accepted. what a good relationship means is having someone who you can depend on and who will be there for you. in all my relationships in life, i should be able to feel safe and to be myself. toxic people will say things to manipulate you and change who you are as a person (5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship by olivia t. taylormoreau fye week 4). but, as mentioned before, i am amazing just the way i am. so, now i see that the way i love myself is the way others should love me. and i should not sacrifice that by any means. when we treat others with https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ liebezeit 4 kindness we unlock our purpose and what it means to rejoice (2021 laetare medalist address by carla harrismoreau fye week 5). treating people with kindness means treating them for all that they are and all that they can be. i believe now more than ever that the best kind of people is the ones who love us for who we are. if they love you, you will not have to change yourself. i do not have to forfeit my identity for anyone. once we recognize what we believe we can see better what definitions we define for ourselves. these beliefs define me by showing me the importance of being personal which enacts personal growth. as i continue to mature and grow in life i will hold with me these beliefs: i am not perfect, god is everywhere, and that i should not forfeit my identity in order to please others. i believe that if i stick to these core values i will live a better and more fulfilled life. in the future, i plan to teach others the skills i have learned to help them recognize how amazing they are. moreau first-year experience, thus far, has shown me a new version of myself and has allowed me to be vulnerable in order to grow. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 moreau integration iii rauguth 1 professor cathrine wagner fys 10102 4 march, 2022 a lasting impact although i may be writing this eulogy at a very young age, much of my core beliefs and graditutes have been set and thus, i believe the only additions i’ll have to make are thanks to those who had helped me along the way. as we lose the ones who are close to us, we begin to realize it was that person's character, their spirit, which always made our time with them so great, perhaps not simply a physical presence. for when they are gone we still retain their impacts on us as it was their character which had impacted us, not their physical being. from the way we carry ourselves to our acts of justice and kindness, we are showing others who we are as a person, as our choices are a direct correlation to our beliefs. for this reason i want to be remembered as an inspiration, an example, in which people can follow if they’d like to live a life well-lived. in order to lead by example, thus be an inspiration for those pursuing a life well-lived we first need to know what one may look like. first and foremost there is balance, balance within your life is key in order to keep your physical and mental health as in good condition as possible for as long as possible. maintaining good health in my opinion is vital for living a life well lived. in week one of the moreau iyer pico stated that “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour … i’ll have to meditate for two”(week 1). with our mind also being a muscle we must make sure to take time and recover all of our muscles to make sure we maintain that balance within our lives. not only do we want to maintain a balance in our physical bodies but we also need to have a balance in our surroundings as well, which is where diversity comes into play. diversity, whether that is “differences of culture, religion, and conviction can co-exist with friendship, civility and even love”(week 2). as demonstrated in week two, it is crucial for us to explore many walks of life as it allows us to bridge the gap dividing the different cultures. when we are able to accept others while also expressing our individuality we are able to influence each other's lives, leaving us both with a positive insight that we would have never encountered otherwise. learning from others is the only way we are able to develop as humans which is why the final aspect of living a life well-lived is to keep an open mind. “the humility to hear what we are good at and the humility to hear what we are not good at is enormously important”(week 3) as this is what allows us to reconsider our own actions and potentially change them for the greater good. a life well-lived is not only determined from a single perspective, but a collection of perspectives which have been gathered by those around you. having an open mind is what allows us to live a balanced life because without it we are straying further from our roots of what it means to be a social creature. by keeping in mind what it means to live a life well-lived we are able to act in ways which lead us to that fulfillment of a life well lived. as we become older we gain more rauguth 2 opportunities to try things you may not have tried before such as a new skill or activity. this is why keeping an open mind is so important because with time you have more and more experiences with others which helps you widen your perspective on the wide range of possibilities and opportunities. as discussed in week four, “career decision making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime”(week 4), which i believe is largely due to the fact that with our limited time, we will never be able to truly experience everything. this is why i believe trying as much as possible is a good practice to have leading you to a life well-lived. although having an open mind will give you the best chances of experiencing as much as possible, there will always be obstacles which may seem to put a hold on you living your life. no one ever looks forward to encountering obstacles, but if we were to never encounter them, then we would never be able to realize the many things that we take for granted in our lives. “i was always so focussed on what i could not do…but then i began to realize that some of the things that i could do can be a blessing to some others.”(week 6) this quote from week six brings out exactly why encountering obstacles is so important as it allows us that time to reflect on things we may take for granted in our lives. a key part to living a life well-lived is to believe yourself that your life is worth living which goes hand and hand with being grateful for the blessings that we have in our lives. now i know so far this may not seem like the typical eulogy listing all of the accomplishments i want to be remembered for, but what it has been are the aspects in which i have implemented into my life that i would want to be remembered for. the reflection exercise that we did in week five really made me realize it's not my accomplishments that i want to be remembered for but it's who i was as a person. i want to be remembered for always keeping an open mind, for i was always seeking advice from others in order to improve myself. i want to be remembered as someone who wasn't afraid to diversify themselves, someone who surrounded themselves with a variety of people and communities. i want to be remembered as someone who was able to maintain a balance, not of just mental and physical health, but a balanced lifestyle. i want to be remembered as a role model not only to those around me, but to all those who also seek to live a life well-lived. but mostly importantly i want to be remembered for how i used my influence. i quote that i found in week seven states, “through humility and concrete love, power becomes a service, a force for good”(week 7). to be remembered for how i used my influence among those around me to better the lives of others would be among my greatest wishes as through this alone i have used my life to set a positive example for those around me, which to me is a life well-lived. citations ("why we need to slow down our lives" , by pico iyer moreau fye week one) ("hesburgh video" , produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) ("three key questions" , by father micheal himes moreau fye week three) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 rauguth 3 ( “navigating your career journey”, by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) ("the grotto: why does god allow suffering?", by aria swarr moreau fye week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”, by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau fye capstone integration professor retartha 4/29/2022 following core values to a life well lived the prompt for the final capstone integration in the moreau first year experience (fye) course is the following: how do i pursue a life well lived? this single, short question may at first appear simple. however, behind that question lies layers of self-reflection, planning, and deep thought necessary if one is to truly give a thorough response. one of the reasons that the question is so hard is because there is no singular answer. one person’s life well lived may look drastically different than others. no matter how one’s ideal life looks though, there is an underlying theme of a life well lived being a life that brings said person joy. there is an important distinction to be made between joy and happiness. happiness is the feeling of positive emotions. positive emotions come and go, inflate and then wear off. they change from moment to moment. joy on the other hand is much deeper. it comes from the center of one's being, spawning from “a [feeling of] genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ( “three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). in order to feel joy, one has to be happy with how they are living their life. the way to be happy with the way one is living their life is to live a life that holds true to their core values. a core value is something that a person holds closest to them in their life. the connections, traits, and/or thoughts that a person values most are their core values. if i am going to live a life well lived, then i have to live a life that is reflective of my core values. that said, what are my core values? finding my core values is a process that i have gone through for the past 6 months. throughout high school, i was not always a happy kid and did not find a lot of joy with how i was living my life. when coming to college, i wanted that to change. i wanted to live a life that https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/15864 when i got up in the morning, i was excited to live another day. luckily for me, i did not have to take this journey of self-discovery alone. the moreau fye course guided me in the journey of finding my core values. in week one of moreau fye, i learned about how to slow down my life and limit distractions. technology today has made everything so fast paced, that i sometimes feel like “i’m never truly caught up with my life” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). however, by slowing down my life, i am able to destress and more effectively focus in my life. in week two of moreau fye, we looked at people who have had success at a young age through the domer dozen. i personally learned from the description of dr. austin hickman. dr. hickman had great success in his line of work, but he also “co-established the cornell rowing club, where he remains a coach” because of his love for rowing as a child (domer dozen by dr. austin hickman moreau fye week 2). this line made me realize that one does not have to sacrifice hobbies and personal interests for success. i have many hobbies such as volleyball that i was not ready to give up, but thought i had to when coming to college. in week four of moreau fye, i learned about choosing career paths from the career development center. while the article overall was about choosing career paths, the message from it applied to life as a whole. it taught me that “the only way to know more about [my]self is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey'' by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). if i was going to find my core values, i would have to try new things and encounter new situations in order to find out what i valued in those situations. week five was all about personal growth, and achieving that through conversation with those closest to you. for this week, i talked to a past coach i had grown close with. we reflected https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144347 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144347 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144367 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ on how each of us grew and changed throughout the multiple years of him coaching my team. he said that throughout the years “i had become unapologetically me” (discernement conversation activity moreau fye week 5). we both believed that this was necessary to living a life well lived because if one was to hold true to their core values then they had too truly be themselves. finally in week 6, i learned how to effectively self-reflect. self-reflection is a very powerful tool in living a life well lived because it allows one to identify and change parts of their life that they don’t like, while appreciating parts of their life they do like. however, if selfreflection is done incorrectly then one “can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when [they] started” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). for self-reflection to be effective, it has to be focused with a specific goal in mind. after week 6, i started reflecting more on my previous experiences, both through selfreflection and talking to those closest to me. it was during this period of time that i truly started to understand and articulate my core values. these core values were then articulated in my personal mission statement written in week 13 of moreau fye. the mission statement states: “i, , will live my life by holding true to three statements. first, i will support those closest to me, being as good of a friend as i can be. second, i will work hard to accomplish the goals i have set for myself in life. third, i will stay true to my beliefs and values, letting those beliefs and values be reflected through my actions.” (“personal mission statement” by moreau fye week 13) breaking down this mission statement, the first core value of mine reflected is friends and family. my relationships with those i care about is the thing that i hold most important in my life. i think i value these relationships so highly because “life flows through our relationships with https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1fefdr-ir3d8en2tzfbiu1xn2q2ve8lb5vocaq9owx7q/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1fefdr-ir3d8en2tzfbiu1xn2q2ve8lb5vocaq9owx7q/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/modules/items/144433 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1xubmhlx1voerviunam2fkbozhu9jbt2nvcqnsq6d6ii/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1xubmhlx1voerviunam2fkbozhu9jbt2nvcqnsq6d6ii/edit others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i plan on reflecting this core value by being as good of a friend, sibling, or significant other as i can be. in order to do this, i need to “show compassion”, and “accompany” the people i’m closest with in my life (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau week 9). showing compassion means being there for the people in my life, and to empathize with them. if more people did this in the world, then there would be a greater chance that a world where “a world where justice and love prevail” is created (”constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by congregation of the holy cross moreau week 12). the second core value reflected in my mission statement is working hard. when i was young, i was always told that anything i wanted to do was possible as long as i was willing to work hard enough to do it. now that i’m older, i realize there are some limitations to that statement, but i still believe that the message of it holds true. if you are willing to put in the necessary work, then you will be able to achieve your goals. in my life i will work hard to fulfill my dreams, as well as help those i care about fulfill theirs. finally, the last core value of mine (which is not super well portrayed in my mission statement) is that of perspective and open-mindedness. in today's world, the “mainstream sources — schools, textbooks, media — don’t provide us with the multiple perspectives we need'' in order formulate holistic views and make informed decisions (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau week 10). people are so quick to choose their side, make a statement, and then refuse to change it. this process leads to social divide, and it is difficult to mend the resulting social divide due to the echo chambers that are created. echo chambers are when people are only surrounded by like-minded people, so all they hear is reinforcement of their own beliefs/viewpoints. echo chambers close minds and “lock [people] into certain world views” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s moreau week 11). as stated above, one of my core values is perspective. by this i mean that i want to be willing and able to understand the issues of our world from multiple perspectives. by doing this, i will be able to understand others better, while also understanding the given issue better. i will try to understand issues from multiple perspectives before forming my beliefs about them, and once those beliefs are formed, i will keep an open-mind while continuing to learn about our world. as freshman year comes to a close, i can confidently say that i have experienced immense amounts of personal growth throughout the school year. i went from someone who wasn’t joyous with the way i was living life in high school to having the best year of my life during freshman year of college. through the personal journey i went on, with help from those close to me and notre dame student resources, i was able to identify and articulate my core values. going forward, i will try to live a life reflective of these core values, with the ultimate goal of building upon the joy i experienced during my freshman year. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s part 1: eulogy a farewell to mary o’connor the family of mary o’connor was forced to say a heartbreaking goodbye this week following the death of their beloved sister, daughter, aunt, wife, cousin, and most importantly, friend. mary o’connor lived a long, happy life filled with much excitement and joyful memories. growing up in connecticut with her three siblings, two dogs and supportive parents, mary was able to explore her interests and abilities and discern much about herself at an early age. she looked back with affection on the memories of her childhood, particularly on the time she was blessed to have with her two sisters and one brother as they all grew together under the same roof. mary forged long-lasting friendships during her time at home, and was still in close contact with friends from middle and high school throughout her life. mary spoke fondly of her time at sacred heart greenwich, her all-girls catholic school in the beautiful town of greenwich, connecticut. she credited the school with instilling and enforcing within her the important values of charitable action, giving back to the community surrounding her, and finding joy in learning. she made friends there that have persisted throughout her entire life. after graduating from sacred heart, mary went on to attend the university of notre dame in south bend, indiana. mary always spoke with sheer appreciation about her time at notre dame. it was there that mary not only continued to form relationships with friends she held dearly, but also where she discovered her passion for sociological research. mary used her time at notre dame to explore interests she found herself curious about and excited by, such as writing for the school’s student-led newspaper and involving herself in research projects that interested her. it was through this attitude of willingness to try new things that she ultimately discovered passions that would persist throughout her whole professional career. mary immediately found herself interested in the power that sociological research held to concretely impact the way in which individuals think of the world and their place in it. mary aimed to involve herself in the research projects of many of her professors while an undergraduate, and then went on to receive her master’s in the field at new york university. going to graduate school in new york allowed mary to work during the day and gain more experience in the professional field and go to classes at night, an opportunity she often regarded as essential to her professional and personal development. here, mary met her husband, later to become her life partner and biggest supporter. it was also during this time that mary embarked on her first research project, examining the correlation between proximity to toxic waste facilities and race. mary spent virtually the rest of her life using her findings in this field to advocate for concrete policy addressing the problem of environmental racism in america. mary wrote various journal articles and even a research-based novel that made her findings well-known, and received much support in her efforts to change the way americans think about issues regarding the environment. up until the time of her death, mary continued to use her research to support the common good. perhaps what mary was most proud of, though, was her ability to raise six amazing children alongside her husband. mary viewed her duty to her children as the primary responsibility of her life, and was willing to sacrifice almost anything to ensure the success and happiness of her children. mary was quick to pass up on personal or professional opportunities to ensure her availability to her children and her ability to be a caring and supportive mother. mary often credited her own mother for setting such a clear example of what it meant to be a good mom, and mary found herself often reflecting on how she used her experiences with her own mother growing up to become the mom she always wanted to be. mary’s children meant everything to her. though they are all saddened by her death, they are quick to testify to the life full of love their mother lived. though mary’s husband passed away years ago, he often described his wife as the prime example of sacrifice and love for her family. mary often spoke of how lucky she was to meet her grandchildren. she was a fun-loving, adventurous grandmother, present as much in the lives of her grandchildren as she was in the lives of her own children. family members often speak of how mary has never missed a family event, whether it be a baptism or simply a barbeque. “my sister’s commitment to family is truly unparalleled. we’ve been beyond lucky to call her our sister,” recently remarked mary’s older sister erin. mary leaves behind her six children and her 20 grandchildren, who are deeply saddened by her death but quick to mention the quality life that mary lived. her son kevin, named after mary’s own father, recently said of his mother’s passing: “my mother has always aimed for her legacy to be one of love, compassion for others, and fulfillment both personally and professionally–and it’s safe to say she achieved all of that and more.” truly, mary is remembered both in her family and community as a joyful spirit always there to lift others up and contribute positively to any situation. mary was many things–successful, kind, caring, accomplished, humble, and spirited. most importantly, though, mary o’connor was loved. mary enveloped her family into a tight-knit circle of connection that will persist well beyond her passing. she receives the most credit for establishing the close familial ties that persist in her family to this day. her presence at family gatherings will be missed greatly. condolences and remembrances can be offered at mary’s funeral service, which will follow a family-only celebration of her life. her memorial will occur at st. peter’s church in litchfield, connecticut–a parish comprised of much of mary’s own dearest family and friends. part 2: integration trials, tribulations and triumphs: the obstacles and successes of a life well-lived the past seven weeks in moreau have encouraged me to reflect on what it means for me to live a life that is well-lived. despite the seemingly simple nature of this question, the more time i spent seeking to answer it, the more confused and unsure i became. while i possess a deep awareness of what matters most to me in life, figuring out how to implement these values poses a new challenge i have never pondered before. after exploring the materials presented to me in moreau the past seven weeks, i have gained clarity as to not only what comprises a life well-lived, but also how to ensure that i can live it out. particularly, the “hesburgh” documentary of week two allowed me to see how much is possible to accomplish in one life. father hesburgh is perhaps one of the best examples of a life well-lived through his ability to dedicate himself to various important causes and make a positive impact while still maintaining meaningful and close relationships with others. as people reflected on hesburgh’s various skills and talents in the film, one individual remarked with awe that “father hesburgh had an extraordinary ability to reach across lives” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). truly, father hesburgh was able to make an impact on virtually everyone around him, remaining committed to social justice initiatives and disregarding anyone who told him he wasn’t capable of something. i realized that father hesburgh’s ability to bring people of all backgrounds together is something that i view as important in my ability to live a life that is fulfilling and worthwhile to me. moreover, his ability to balance making an impact with maintaining close relationships is something that i also aspire to understand as i grow older. in the business of our everyday lives, it's hard to manage finding time for those we love and for doing things that are positive for the world and others. as reflected in my eulogy, i am to strike a balance between my commitments to my academics as well as my relationships through careful time management and thoughtful decision making about what is best for me and those i love. while this may be easier said than done, throughout my time at notre dame i have already developed my skills of time management to allow myself to be fully dedicated to both my social and academic life. on this note, pico iyer’s article about “why we need to slow down our lives” inspired me to think about how in order to live a life well-lived, we must understand how to know when the business of our lives is clouding our understanding of who we are. as iyer writes, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). truly, part of a life well-lived involves recognizing when to take a step back from the hustle and bustle that often consumes us. as reflected in my eulogy, i am to be fully present with family and friends and embrace special moments of calm when they come my way and help others to do the same. even now, i try to encourage my friends to be present and engaged with each other when we find time to come together despite our busy college schedules. as iyer wisely suggests, it is only through taking these moments outside of the craziness of life that we reevaluate our purpose and how we are progressing on our paths to lives well-lived. moreover, sister aletheia is an example of how a life well-lived requires an openness to new challenges and accepting new callings when they arise. sister aletheia was willing to abandon her well-planed, comfortable life in pursuit of new experiences and new callings, something many people struggle with. truly, “when her longtime boyfriend picked her up from the airport after the trip, she broke up with him and canceled her plans to go to law school. within four years, she was wearing a habit at the convent” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham, moreau fye week three). sister aletheia’s willingness to follow new passions and accept new challenges as they present themselves is a crucial aspect of what it means to live a fulfilling and happy life. new opportunities and challenges can present themselves in various ways, and part of a life well-lived involves being willing to give up certain goals in pursuit of new passions. as can be seen by sister aletheia’s pursuit of her own happiness, part of a life well-lived involves discerning and discovering what inspires and fascinates you and incorporating it into a career and life path. much of what we did in week 4, including reading content and completing surveys created by the meruelo family center for career development, involved reflecting upon what potential career paths could be best fit for us and allow us to make the most out of our talents and gifts. week 5 also encouraged us to have meaningful conversations with those we love to further our understanding of how others view our skills and specialties. from both weeks, i was able to more clearly see how a life well-lived is largely grounded in pursuing a career and life path that provides you with consistent fulfillment and satisfaction. through the activities of both weeks 4 and 5, i was able to clearly identify finding a career path that satisfies and challenges you as integral to a life well-lived. as seen in my eulogy, my passion for sociological research is one that drives me to approach each new learning experience with an attitude of excitement and anticipation, and propels me forward in my studies here at notre dame. similarly, the content from week 6 challenged me to reflect on how a life well-lived is defined also by my own understanding of myself and my place in the world around me. specifically, tasha eurich’s article about being introspective really resonated with me as i attempted to grow in my understanding of what a life well-lived truly means to me. her notion that “ if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) made me realize that i often don’t spend enough time reflecting on how i’m feeling in my current life situation or what i can do to make myself a happier, fuller person. additionally, her discussion of how an understanding of the self helps one contribute positively to others ties into my understanding of a life well-lived as one that is full of collaboration and meaningful relationships with others. in connection with this idea, the ideas about community building and understanding present in week 7 add on to my understanding of a life well-lived as one where i contribute positively to the community surrounding me and help in building a community and world where everyone feels welcomed and included. specifically, father greg boyle’s suggestion to “close both eyes: see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgements, our constant exclusion” (chapter 8: jurisdiction by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7) presented me with an opportunity to reflect and build upon how i view the world around me as well as those present in me. fr. boyle’s insights aided me in my realization that a life well-lived is not only defined by my own happiness, but my contribution to the happiness of others. this chapter opened my eyes to the importance of connectivity and persistent contribution to the lives of others, and how it interacts with a life well-lived, as seen in my eulogy’s depiction of how i am to use sociological research to spread awareness about environmental racism, an issue i hold close to my heart. conclusively, the past seven weeks in moreau have encouraged me to think both inwardly and outwardly about how i can contribute to the complex and ever-changing world around me. after reflecting on what a life well-lived means to me, i have come to understand that it is more than just my own happiness and success. rather, as demonstrated by the various examples presented by the past seven weeks’ material, a life-well live is one that involves both personal happiness and a positive contribution to the community surrounding you. as i continue to grow on my journey to understanding what my future will look like, i aim to incorporate this definition into my actions and decisions in order to guide myself on a path of self-discovery and reflection. sisolak 1 professor pruitt moreau fye 28 february 2022 eulogy of we are gathered here to remember the young man , who as we all know, tragically passed away when he could not find his way out of a giant paper bag. he will be greatly missed by his friends and family alike. we can all learn from his short existence. i sure have. throughout his nineteen years of this life, jacob eventually started to wonder: “what makes a good life?” growing up in ashland montana was a good start, as it taught him how to grow used to a more quiet environment vastly different from his college experience at the university of notre dame. if he had grown up in a bustling city, finding the quiet within himself would have been more difficult for him to adjust to. we all know how important it is to slow down and reflect on our lives. as famous poet emily dickinson said: “some keep the sabbath going to church...i keep it, staying at home” (week 1, pico iyer). jacob--though young--was able to master this, as we all should. we are all learning from his life, but keep in mind jacob had his own inspirations for a well-lived life. aside from jesus christ, who is the epitome of what a role model should be, jacob looked up to other figures, including father hesburgh, father gregory boyle, and the “domer dozen” of notre dame (module 2 and module 7). we can draw upon the wisdom of those that have made a difference in this world: from father hesburgh and his accomplishments, to the domer dozen and their contributions to the notre dame community, to father gregory boyle and his impact on the gang members in certain parts of california. on top of this, jacob also made sure to check out the notre dame meruelo family center for career development while he was alive (module 4. sorry i didn’t know how else to use this module). as he learned from the life experiences of these individuals and the development center, so should we learn from jacob. there is always something to learn in other people and places. now jacob discovered three questions in guiding his life decisions (week 3, fr. michael himes). the first of these questions was: “is it a source of joy?” for him up to his years at notre dame, he felt as sisolak 2 if it were too early to tell. he believed that there would be more joy once he got past the hard times. he knew perseverance was part of the life journey, something we should all keep in our minds. he would remember the words of aria swarr: “so, i encourage all of us to just focus [on] what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (week 6). the second question was: “is there a way to use your gifts to their fullest?” now jacob was taught this from a young age and was of the firm mindset that his college life was a way to cultivate his gifts to better serve people later. the third question was perhaps the one most on jacob’s mind: “do your decisions help society?” unfortunately, the paper bag got in his way before he could readily determine this one, but all of us know that jacob would have kept this question in his mind throughout his life adventure. it surely lines up with what his family and friends have said about him. not too long ago before his demise, jacob was able to have a beautiful conversation with one of his hallmates at notre dame (module 5 discernment activity). what we might not have known about jacob was said in this interview: he was introverted but driven by thoughts of helping the word, recognizing that he had flaws that needed to be worked on. if there is one thing jacob’s life can show us, it is that none of us are perfect. not that we should look down on the flaws of others, but we should do our best to help others with them with what gifts we have. jacob did not just identify his weaknesses and form relationships, but he learned how to be inclusive with everyone he met. growing up on the northern cheyenne and crow reservations, he was exposed to a lot of diversity. this helped him with his transition to the more diverse campus of the university of notre dame. he learned well from the words of pope francis, another person jacob heeded the wisdom of. he kept the words of francis in his mind: “the future is made of ‘yous,’ it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others...each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (module 7, pope francis video). as jacob tried his best to follow these words, so should we try. you may ask: “what exactly did jacob do to follow these wise words?” though it was nowhere near the scope of say, father sisolak 3 gregory boyle, who changed (and continues to change) the lives of los angeles gang members around him and brought them together, but jacob did his best to help others in smaller ways such as through volunteer work and service opportunities. if he were alive today, jacob would definitely say that he did not do enough to make the world a better place by being among those on the margins of society as father boyle dedicated his life to doing. it just goes to show that jacob was not of the mindset of being the most comfortable he could be. jacob, though his death was anticlimactic, tried his best to use his upbringing and past experiences to pursue his dream. that dream was to make a difference in the world by harnessing his notre dame education in such a way so that he could benefit the least fortunate. his life goes to show that there is still much to learn about ourselves and those around us. no one is insignificant. jacob had a lot more to give, but may he rest in peace nonetheless. sisolak 4 bibliography (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1) (“video: hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) (“domer dozen” moreau fye week 2) (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3) (“navigating you career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau week 4) (“7 clues assessment activity” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau week 4) (“discernment conversation activity” moreau week 5) (“5 minutes” by grotto – moreau week 6) (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8” by fr. gregory boyle – moreau week 7) (“his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope fracis – moreau week 7) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript sisolak 5 capstone integration applying my life’s mission my first year at notre dame has led me to believe that my personal mission in life is to help others. during the first week of moreau this semester, i heard the saying, “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in addition, during week six i learned that “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective [yes, there’s a wrong way]” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). these two statements tell us how to be introspective. we have to take the time to look at ourselves and the world around us in order to understand who we really are. while doing this, we have to ask ourselves the right questions to achieve the best results. in my introspection and through reading the perspective of others, i concluded that my goal in life is to help as many people as possible. as i stated in my personal mission statement, “i feel that everything i have done in my life has either been to help people or to lead me to a place in life where i can help people better” (my mission statement moreau fye week thirteen). however, while that is true, i do not have a plan for what exactly i want to do for a career. during weeks four and five of moreau this semester, we discussed discernment and picking a career. the center for career development says, “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). my self-concept (which consists of my values, interests, personality, and skills) is somewhat contradictory. while i value helping others, i am a very introverted person who frequently deals with social anxiety, making it difficult for me to interact directly with people. however, in an interview with my mom, she affirmed that my anxiety does not have to define me and what i want to be (my mom moreau fye week five). she reminded me that getting help from others can help with this anxiety, and just because i want to help others does not mean i do not need help. because of her guidance, i am confident that my self-concept will no longer contradict, which will allow me to find a career path where i can help people in many ways. one of the ways that i want to help people is by bringing people together. pope francis said in a ted talk, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). he firmly believes that the purpose of life has a lot to do with interacting with others. this allows you to see different perspectives and live a full life. in addition, in the movie “hesburgh” about the great president of notre dame, father hesburgh, the current president, father jenkins, says, “the latin word for priest is pontifex, [which means] bridge builder. ted was a bridge-builder between people and god and among people'' https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). using the pope’s view of life’s purpose alongside father hesburgh’s example of how to live, i hope to be the type of person that elevates the lives of others by bringing people together. i hope to be a bridge-builder between different people to help them live life to the fullest. another way i hope to help people is by changing the way the world works for the better. we live in a society that is prejudiced toward many different types of people. one of my goals is to help change those people who are openly racist, sexist, homophobic, etc. in a podcast about politics, one of the speakers said, “if they wanted to actually participate in politics seriously, they would go about this all differently. instead of hating the other side, instead of hating a random person who says they're republican or says they're democrat, they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction?” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). while this quote is about politics, i think it can also apply to bigotry. instead of just looking at bigots as awful people, i think we have a responsibility to try to educate them and make them better people. that way, society can improve one person at a time. however, society is not solely flawed because of prejudice. as dr. d’angelo says, “this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the u.s. today if one ignores group power relations” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). we live in a systemically racist society, where white people have an inherent advantage over other races. due to how society is run, black people have to struggle every day with a disadvantage. dean marcus cole describes a story where he was impacted directly by systemic racism. he was pulled over by a cop and dehumanized just because of his skin color. he said, “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). we need to change the way the world is run so that people do not have to worry about randomly dying just because of the color of their skin. it will not happen overnight, but i hope to be a part of the movement to end systemic racism. the final way i hope to help people is through accompaniment. accompaniment is a concept we learned during week nine of moreau, and it essentially means just being there for someone during times of hardship. it does not necessarily mean doing everything you can to fix their situation. it is just about being with them. an example of this in action was when professor reifenberg went to a foreign country to try and help underprivileged children, but he got sick. he said, “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be ‘their helper,’ they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). like the professor, as someone who always wants to help people, i hope to learn how to accompany people better. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://www.huffpost.com/entry/why-its-so-hard-to-talk-to-white-people-about-racism_b_7183710 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit a nun with a unique philosophy stated, “for almost all of humanity, people died at younger ages than we do now, more frequently died at home, and had less medical control over their final days. death was far less predictable, and far more visible” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). this nun believes that we need to acknowledge our own deaths because that allows us to live our lives the best way possible. for me, living while understanding that i will die only strengthens my idea of my mission in life: to help people. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html moreau fye capstone integration 4/29/22 reflecting on the positive element of change i, , dedicate myself to living for others. through my dad’s actions, i learned that my faith should be bigger than my fears. through my mom’s lessons as a child, i absorbed that gratitude helps one focus on the positives in my life. i am grateful for the lessons i learned from my parents. so, i want to use the lessons they taught me to be a more compassionate and loving leader. i have had my fair share of successes as a student, but i should always remain humble. as a disciple of god, i should forgive others when they have wronged me because life is too short for grudges. i am called to serve others with the utmost dignity. my interactions with others are more important than achievements. as said, in the movie it's a wonderful life: “a man with friends is never a failure.”’ if i feel like a failure, i should always remain optimistic when there is seemingly no hope. i should remember that fear is the opposite of faith. i should know that all i need is faith to put my best self forward for others daily. lessons learned in moreau this semester can help me live out this refined mission statement. i discovered that crafting a personal mission statement takes time and is not always final. first, in order to draft a personal mission statement, you need to be able to define what you want to be and what you want to accomplish; second, you need to identify an influential person; third, you should define your life roles; last, you should be able to craft all of these aspects together (“adaptation of stephen covey's method of crafting a personal mission statement” by stephen covey moreau fye week thirteen). reflecting on this personal statement i refined for this essay will help me further animate and discover my life’s purpose over the next three years. when i am grateful for every new day, i see the world in a more positive light. a way i can practice gratitude is through self-reflection. if a step back and reflect on my life, i can fully discern the positive impact different people and events. in the fast pace of the modern world, we are losing connection with ourselves: “but as fast as geography is coming under our control, the clock is exerting more and more tyranny over us. and the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves '' (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as a person who wants to be involved in the world around me going forward in college and beyond, i should try not to lose contact with myself. practicing self-reflection will help me gain a gracious perspective on life. i could over the next three find time to practice self-reflection while working out after class or walking around the lakes with a friend during a study break. when i practice self-reflection and gratitude, love and compassion will come easier to me. treating others with compassion in order to bring people together is an admirable goal that i want to frequently accomplish in my life. through the power of love father hesburgh received from god, he was able to unite people to make a positive impact on the world during his lifetime. father hesburgh is a great example of uniting people with love and compassion: “he could bring people together…that’s the kind of leader we need today” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh showed love by embracing humanity. a famous example of this is when he marched with martin luther king in chicago. father hesburgh knew catholic social teaching principles: “promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). father hesburgh is a person to look up to when i am called to leadership over the next three years. this summer, i am serving as a student leader at the alumni association’s notre dame family service camp. during next schoolyear, i hope to embrace humanity by leading my friends back to some of those sites to serve because there is great need in the south bend community. in order be a leader of love and compassion, i must practice humility and forgiveness throughout my college years. when looking back at my life as we did with the eulogy assignment, i want people to remember in college as a humble and forgiving guy (“integration three'' by moreau fye week eight). in order to be a humble person over the next three years, i could take a step back from my opinions and learn other people’s perspectives on issues in class and social settings. for example, if someone says something i do not particularly agree with i should not walk away ignore them. in order to grow in wisdom, i should ask listen first, ask them questions to glean a better perspective on that specific issue, and then share my opinion. this is a necessity because as a society we are becoming more polarized: “we are losing our sense about how someone might disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, think nd moreau fye week eleven). in the notre dame community, if i model listening to different perspectives, others might do the same. if i am criticized for having a different viewpoint than someone, i should learn to forgive them for degrading my perspective. over the next three years, practicing humility and forgiveness will help me live an overall happier life. if i can forgive others, i will be able to respect their dignity throughout my college years. in order to uphold someone’s dignity, i must be able to ask the right questions: ‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” ("fives minutes” by the grotto network moreau fye week six). asking why questions might possibly come off as hypocritical and less forgiving. whereas, asking what questions imply care about a person’s well-being or their dignity. an exemplar “what” question might go along these lines: what is going on today, what classes are taking you taking, or what major are you pursuing. in order to further respect others' dignity, i must also acknowledge their role in forming my personality and ideas as a person. in other words, once you realize someone’s dignity, you acknowledge they have an impact on your life. in week five, i was given the opportunity to discern other people can have an impact on my career discernment. i talked to my dad and this made me realize i possessed various strengths i did not know about in the past (“conversation discernment activity”, by moreau fye week five). if i can acknowledge others' dignity over the next three years, i will be prepared to be a solid adult in my career. acknowledging a person’s dignity will help me strengthen and formulate new relationships over the next three years. i must reflect on my strong relationships with my dad in order to form new strong connections over the next three years. my dad makes me feel important whenever we are together by recognizing the goodness that i didn’t even know i had in me. this is something i want to carry into my relationships in my dorm next year – helping people realize their good qualities. i must realize that building these relationships is my choice: “solidarity, however, is not an automatic mechanism. it cannot be programmed or controlled. it is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone” (“why the future worth building includes everyone”, by pope francis, ted moreau fye week seven). there is a sense of gratitude and excitement in realizing that i am free to form relationships. i cannot wait to build new relationships at my dorm and in notre dame classes like i did with my gateway peers this year. if i can build and strengthen current relationships while forging similar connections, i am enthusiastic about the future. people enjoy optimistic people in relationships. but personal optimism is also a key to success, especially in college. sister aletheia has a wise quote on optimism: “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die", by ruth graham moreau fye week three). if i experience hardships, i can learn lessons from that encounter to better ourselves in the future. an optimistic person experiences life through the ups and downs: “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” ("navigating your career journey”, by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). experiencing the good and bad while having a positive attitude will enable me to get to know myself on a deeper level. i will face challenges with a difficult class or possibly a friendship, but remaining optimistic in these scenarios will help me overcome these difficulties. in the face of adversity, i should turn to my faith. as a person of faith, i believe in the inherent goodness of the world. therefore, i should attempt to bring out the best in the world around me. professor stephen reifenburg has a meaningful insight of how to bring about societal change: “any attempt to bring about meaningful, positive societal change needs to be made thoughtfully, respectfully, and collaboratively” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together”, by stephen reifenburg moreau fye week nine). social change cannot be accomplished by an individual, it must be carried through by a society together. dean g. marcus cole has an insightful perspective on the hate present in society: "i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other" (“i am george floyd, except i can breathe. and, i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). in general, dean cole implies that humanity does not have faith in each other because they fear each other. as a person who wants to impact the world in a positive way, i should show that i have faith in humanity in order to alleviate fear leading to hate. i hope to alleviate fear and hate in the notre dame community by creating solidarity. i can stand with my fellow students if they are aggravated, stressed, lonely, or sad. this can be done by talking or sending a text to someone that is feel these emotions that can potentially lead to hate. i am glad to have had the opportunity to write this integration to reflect on my personal mission. throughout writing the paper, i was reminded that my personal mission statement is going to constantly be refined. this is because i was rephrasing ideas as i wrote my reflection. like my personal mission statement life will change. i should have faith in change. i am grateful for moreau this year because it gave me the opportunity to reflect with courage on that change. moreau integration *parts from my mission statement are in bold. my mission to a well-lived life throughout my life, i have come up with many ideas and made many plans on how to live the best life possible. many of these plans contained many materialistic successes that i was very focused on getting. recently, i have kind of changed my values completely and have actually realized what it is that is most important when pursuing a life well-lived. within the moreau first year course, i have developed new values and have had new plans for life reinforced. after going through this course i have come up with my mission: to create a community and world that is welcoming and accepting of all. i will always be open-minded, as being understanding and open to learning about all different ways of life, cultures, and backgrounds is essential in creating an inclusive and non-separate society. throughout my life, i have seen too many people surround themselves with only people who are alike to them. the importance of inclusivity has become a bigger and bigger value in my life. i have sought out relationships with people very different from me, in order to learn about different ways of life. “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion.”(“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). being a student at a catholic university, i find the quote above to be one of the most important values for all students here to have, as we need to constantly try to become more inclusive and diverse. in the past, i have been very ignorant in hearing opinions from different people who have totally different beliefs than me. “we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well thought out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers.”(“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd moreau fye week 11. i have realized now the importance of not judging people based on what they believe in and getting to know people without any assumptions of their character. assuming my people are bad people just based on their difference from you only creates a more separate and less inclusive community. i will act with courage, for being brave and not afraid to make new connections is one of the most important things in creating a sense of belonging for everyone here at notre dame. i have always been very concerned with my self-image and how other people perceive me. i feel like because of this, i have been too nervous to take risks and have been too timid to develop new relationships. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” ( "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). this quote from an article in this course has encouraged me to live more in the moment and to realize that with taking risks may come very many highs. in the past, i have also always dwelled too much on the past and put myself down for things i could not achieve. i have since lived with the mindset that it is impossible to change the past and that it is best to just move and focus on what it is you can do. i encourage everyone to do the same and live by this quote: “so i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not yet have.”("5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). i want to try to lessen the hate in this world. in order to do so, the first thing i need to do is try to end the separation between different groups of people. each of us needs to branch out and get to know people different from us in order to create a more welcoming and less violent world. striving to create a peaceful and welcoming world, to me, is the most important aspect of pursuing a life well-lived. living in a way that is respectful to everyone and https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ tries to include everyone is one of the most satisfying accomplishments. there is so much change and hate always happening in our world, so i feel like living in this manner will never put you in a bad position with change. “we don’t know where we’re going from here, and we don’t know what we’re going to do, but i can guarantee you there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice and at times human stupidity.”("hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). i find this quote from fr. hesburgh to be a great reminder in today’s world that even when we are celebrating one victory or we have fixed one thing in our community or society, that we still need to remember that there are always other things that have yet to be addressed, and solving them is just as important. the journey to accomplish my mission has brought me many realizations. since trying to follow this way of living, i have learned what it means to be successful. i no longer measure success in your materialistic accomplishment or assets, i now believe that success is measured in your happiness, the happiness you bring to the world, and within the meaningful relationships you have. for a long time, success to me meant what you have achieved in terms of materialistic accomplishments. with this thinking, i constantly was doing everything i could do academically in order to get these things. i was always very hard on myself and did not see any point in giving myself breaks or stopping. i have since realized how unhealthy this mindset was for me. “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break.”("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this quote was exactly what i needed to hear at this point in my life. not only did it make me realize the importance of slowing down such a fast paced lifestyle, but it also made me realize what all i could learn about myself while doing this. “you have to know https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices.”(“navigating your career journey” by dr. donald super moreau fye week 4). when you fully learn about yourself you know what the most important choices are in your life and what you need to do to live a happy and healthy life. i have learned what it means to embrace humanity and my responsibilities to others. it is so important to learn about all different groups of people in order to show the care you have for them and their way of life. it is all of our responsibility to make others feel like they belong in order to create a welcoming environment. “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7). in order to make the most out of my interactions and relationships, i have viewed interactions not as just another random person i’m meeting but instead i try to actually engage in every interaction i have. from this, i am able to realize what characteristics in relationships lead to a good life. it is important to be in the accompaniment of all different types of people. “accompanying the dying helps you understand what is most important about living. accompaniment is a path to deeper understanding, the implications of which couldn’t be foreseen at the outset of the journey together.”(“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). since hearing this quote i have tried to incorporate its message into my life and see the results. i have realized that there are some lessons that i cannot teach myself and that it is very important to accompany people in order to learn and see what is truly important in a good life. since coming to notre dame, i have tried my best to implement my mission into my everyday life. i have tried to make connections with all different kinds of people in order to create a more inclusive environment for everyone that is less separated. “each of us needs to get https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles.”(“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i have implemented this quote into my life and i encourage others to do the same in order to create a more welcoming and less violent world. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ microsoft word capstone integration.docx driscoll 1 capstone integration using values to create personal goals i. personal mission statement (“writing a personal mission statement activity"— moreau fye week thirteen): i strive to place love and faith at the forefront of my decision making. i will always attempt to center my life around love. i wish to act in ways that bring my loved ones closer to me rather than push them away. i believe that love is the best part of life, and i am dedicated to fostering love in my actions so i can bring joy to myself and others around me. i will continue to let my faith grow at notre dame by embracing the opportunities of faith around me. when i act, i want to see what brings others joy so i know how to bring them joy in the future. it is essential that i do not act only in my best interest, but that i also have a positive effect on those around me. bringing others joy will improve lives, which in turn will bring myself joy as well. though being courageous is a challenge, i hold myself responsible to always maintain courage, despite status quos that tempt me to follow what everyone else is doing. i will attempt to prevent my personal struggles from changing my beliefs or perspectives by making me a more pessimistic person. i will take advantage of opportunities to have discussions with peers, even though topics may be difficult to talk about. it is important to me that even when i disagree with someone, we will have a respectful environment and a safe area to discuss differences and understand each other’s perspective. i will not allow myself to be close-minded or self-centered driscoll 2 when i partake in these important discussions. i want to stay true to my values and never act hypocritical. ii. my mission statement captures what i have learned about myself and my goals throughout my experience in moreau, and how i will use this knowledge to act in the coming years. i have learned about role models, and how i want to utilize the actions i witness in others in my own life. one of the major role models that i have learned about through notre dame is father hesburgh. as demonstrated in his movie, he was extremely resilient and faithful, which allowed him to accomplish many great things throughout his life ("hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley—moreau fye week two). specifically, i want to model some of my actions after father hesburgh by aiming to conquer big challenges and maintaining courage and strength, even through failures and suffering. this course has shown me additional ways in which i can use my faith to model my life. first, inclusivity is extremely important to me, and it is important to love each person, despite the differences that exist among us. the catholic faith should be a welcoming environment where no person should be afraid to be themselves, even if they were taught that they “should” be something different than they are ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh—moreau fye week ten). so, in my actions i will make sure to always be loving and friendly to all that i encounter. i have deepened my understanding of my wish to prioritize people and spending time with others. this began with my discernment conversation; seeing that other driscoll 3 people view how my spirit lights up when i get to spend time with the people that i love is really motivating to hear ("week five discernment conversation activity"— moreau fye week five). i will strive to maintain this quality in my personality and prioritize my relationships, even when i get stressed or overwhelmed. i actively seek to recognize the value that people add to my life. coupled with spending time with people who add value to my life is spending less time doing things that take away from my life. one of the things that i do that takes up many hours of my time is using technology; i know that i spend too much time on my phone and on social media, and i want to be better, because i know that phones are a constant distraction to people and cause them to fall behind, as they are not living in the present moment ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer—moreau fye week one). i want to put my phone away more often, which will allow me to have more meaningful social experiences as well as live life more in the present. i have learned to live life slowly, one day at a time, and appreciate everything i have so i can fully experience life. it often becomes too easy to focus on what others have or what could have been ("5 minutes” by aria swarr—moreau fye week six). but i have come to realize that this mindset is pointless, because if there is nothing i can do to change the situation and better myself, then it is useless to think about. with that, another one of my goals is to maintain a positive mindset and be more optimistic, as this will add joy to my life and lessen unnecessary pain. the text “three key questions” defines joy as “a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life,” and personally, i define this rightness as avoiding thinking about unchangeable things ("three key questions” by father michael himes—moreau fye week driscoll 4 three). i hope that avoiding these trivial thoughts will help me be less anxious, and i believe lessening my screen time will further enhance my joy because i will not be comparing myself as much to people that i see online. although i will try to avoid thinking about things that cause unnecessary pain, i know that suffering is meaningful and inevitable, so i will try my best to grow from it, especially during academic failures, which have always been a struggle of mine to overcome. i will utilize faith to overcome each journey and hardship, always remembering that god will eventually “[rescue] us from the injustice we suffer and also from the injustice we inflict” ("constitutions of the congregation of holy cross"—moreau fye week twelve). i believe that in the coming years, faith will be a great tool in making me a more resilient and hopeful person. for me, living more in the present also means not constantly stressing about the future. i often succumb to the pressure that i should have an entire life plan laid out in front of me, especially as a student a prestigious university. young adults are faced with the heavy weight that comes from choosing a major and discussing potential careers, which can be very harmful and a huge stressor ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development—moreau fye week four). in the future, i will aim to still work very hard, but also hold the belief that everything will eventually work out, and i should enjoy my youth before it slips away. i have learned that i constantly need to reassess my values and examine my actions to make sure i am living up to my own expectations. for instance, loving everyone and being an inclusive person is extremely important to me, but i know that driscoll 5 i am not perfect. unfortunately, everyone has their own implicit biases, and the only way to root out these toxic behaviors is to “dismantle what i have set up to keep [others] out,” which is done by picking out the errors in my behavior in order to correct myself for the future ("chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle— moreau fye week seven). i am sure to encounter people who disagree with me over certain beliefs, but instead of looking at these people with hate, i will treat them with respect, because everyone has “inherent human dignity” that must be maintained at all times ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg—moreau fye week nine). additionally, instead of trying to simply shift people’s views, i will try to get them to understand me so that we can have a more open and thoughtful discussion. being hateful makes no progress but trying to broaden people’s perspectives can be very impactful ("passion isn’t enough" by hidden brain media—moreau fye week eleven). in short, there are many ways in which i can use the moreau course and my mission statement in the next three years at notre dame. i will be a welcoming person to everyone, spend as much time as i can with people whose company i enjoy, limit my screen time, and notice both the goodness and badness in the behavior of others in order to shape my own behavior. as long as i remember my goals and values at all times, i believe that i will easily be able to act in ways that live up to the expectations that i have placed upon myself. microsoft word integration 3 ’s life: in review i write and speak today with the unfortunate news of the passing of zach. he lived a great and long life, with many successes. we realize today that it is times like these where we must take a moment and think, and take a break from our very busy lives, and remember the legacy he left on the world. many times, he would be able to connect with the idea that “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). zach was very good at doing such a thing, as he would always take breaks from the world around him and realize how he must continue to think about the state of the world, without being in a rush. one of the best ways he was able to do this was by thinking outside the box, and on his own, not conforming to what people wanted from him, but instead attempting to change people around him in order to better their lives in ways which people never thought of. as a notre dame student and graduate, he was able to learn the teachings from father hesburgh, who “spoke extensively about breaking barriers, and overcoming the expectations that people have of you in order to improve the world around you.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). continuing to live with this phrase in mind was something zach always tried to do, as it would be a benefit to the people he was with in bringing them joy whenever he could. one of the biggest things that drove him to do his best to fill those around him with joy was the idea that it was more important to him that other people were happy than that he was happy himself. he believed that it was worth a little bit of self sacrifice in order to get other people to experience a greater joy. he believed that “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). this phrase was so important to him, as it really was accurate to his beliefs. satisfaction is something you merely see from having material things, from having a lot of money, to feeling like you reached your goals. joy comes from achieving beyond your goals, from doing more in life than what was just for yourself. the purest form of joy is seeing the joy of your own work causing and bringing other people joy. this is at the core of what zach believed. it was always crucial to him that he would be able to take a step back and grow this joy from others, but letting himself see the world from afar, and see the needs of the people around him. as the pope once said, “how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week 7). despite being a great engineer, he always worked to help those around him. service was always something he held close to his heart. one way in which he was able to demonstrate his love for service even at a young age was through his experience in boy scouts, as he was an eagle scout. his mom would describe how “one time when he demonstrated exceptional leadership was he was running my eagle scout project. at that time, he was managing the adults, even those who were off-task. he was leading everyone, including kids and adults. despite it being complicated and difficult, he was respectful, this episode showed that he was still a good leader despite the obstacles that came at my way, and that he was still able to demonstrate my best self. – (reflection done with my mom – moreau fye week 5). his work as an eagle scout taught him from a very young age the benefits and importance of service in the lives of others. he would need to have exceptional leadership, which was something that he would be able to demonstrate throughout his live, as something that be able to use for his benefit throughout his life, especially during his career as an engineer. as for his life in the workforce, he was a dedicated engineer. entering the field because he wanted to use his skills in order to benefit others, with skills in math and physics. one thing he always dedicated his time to was helping younger engineering students. whether this was giving speeches or personally recommending student, he always stuck to the phrase “planning your career is much like planning for a trip.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). many times planning a career is daunting, but he was always ready to help and give kind words. as we ponder the reality of death, and the reality of zach’s death in particular, we must think about how death is a natural thing. we must realize that “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). zach would not have wanted us to dwell too much on his death, as it was one of his philosophies in life to not dwell on anything in the past too much, for that can create more problems for you in the future than what problems you may have already had. all in all, we must understand the reality, but still appreciate the good life he lived. a life full of service, helpfulness, and compassion, he lived his life using his talents to live for others. i did mine where i did a brief eulogy of my highlights in life, and then i go more in depth with my life and my passions with the integrated material. the life of (written in pov of my nephew) was born april 14, 2003 in pensacola, florida to parents stuart and julie snyder. he grew up with eight amazing older siblings that he was able to learn from and admire. he had a fun, carefree spirit, which was noticeable by everyone who met him. as the youngest of nine he definitely got away with some things that his older siblings could have only dreamed of getting away with, such as getting snapchat and an iphone. paul always had this shy, yet outgoing personality which seems contradicting, but he made it work somehow. he went to the university of notre dame and majored in film and television. he started making youtube videos with his friends and after finishing college he went on to pursue a career in youtube. he was named captain of the ultimate frisbee club his senior year of college and he was notorious for working out every single day with no exceptions. paul was never the type of guy to hurt others, which might have been his weakness: not being able to say no to people. i remember when he would go hang out with his friends whenever they called no matter the circumstances. as his nephew i could not help but notice that paul’s relationship with his friends was much stronger than with his family. don’t get me wrong, though, paul loved his family and was extremely close with them, he was just more friend-oriented. i remember him saying he never wanted to get married or have kids when he was in highschool and i guess he was serious about that, because he did neither. we were really close since day 1, when he told me we could buy a mansion together and be just like dude perfect when i was in 2nd grade and he was in highschool. paul was a very talented person, with very unique, but wholesome interests. he has loved legos since he was eight years old. he owned the fact that he liked legos and he hid it from no one. paul had this confidence with him that allowed him to mention legos without getting embarrassed or made fun of. in fact, he has never been bullied in his life just because of his universally liked personality. every day he went to the gym and he pushed himself harder than most people there, always wanting to look better and perform better each day. ultimate frisbee was another one of his passions. whenever we were at the beach and random people were throwing a frisbee paul could not resist the urge to go ask them to throw with them for a bit, always surprising them with his skills. also, paul was able to turn a hobby into a career. he would make videos that he found entertaining with his friends and would post them on youtube. after 5 years of consistent postings he blew up and was able to be a youtuber as a profession. he would always joke with beau about making more money than him as a surgeon by posting dumb prank videos on youtube. paul’s drive and personality set him apart from others. if he said he was going to achieve something he achieved it. from making top 10 in his class in highschool, to working out everyday and maintaining a healthy lifestyle, to his youtube career. he had this crazy ability to manifest the future in the way he wanted and envisioned. his personality was just amazing, too. his friends would tell me that they have never seen paul be genuinely mad. in fact, one of his best friends russell even said the maddest he has ever seen paul was when he tried to mess with paul’s legos. i’ll miss his goofy smile, his humor lightening up the room, being able to talk to him about anything regardless of the matter, and being able to have someone to look up to and just hang out with. i’ll miss him just as i know you all will miss him. rest in peace paul, enjoy heaven. paul was always unsteady. he was always looking for the next challenge, the next high in life. he never really slowed down to reflect on life, his present, and more specifically, living in the future. “all the unhappiness of men,”...“arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau week one). this quote defines the very nature of paul’s life. did he live a happy life? yes, of course. he loved his job, he loved his family, his friends, and most importantly god. but i know that he was always looking towards the future due to his motivating personality. with this personality to always want to do something it was no surprise when paul was politically outspoken when he had a big platform where thousands of people heard his opinion. paul’s alignment with conservate values and the republican party really guided his life. i would remember joseph (his brother) always telling paul to think of other things to talk about besides politics because he could go on for hours. he would get so angered by people hating america he took attacks on america personally. “we don’t know where we’re going from here and we don’t know what we’re going to do. but i can guarantee you there are a lot of battles yet to be one for justice. there are a lot of mountains to be climbed to overcome human ignorance, human prejudice, and at some times, human stupidity” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau week two). paul’s love for america and upholding the freedom of america and what america should stand for was a driving force in his life. just as the quote talks about battles for justice and overcoming human ignorance, this reminded me of paul’s fight for america and overcoming human ignorance on the subject of america. one of the most memorable traits of paul was his want for happiness. he hated doing anything that he did not want to do. when i say that, i mean paul would put off actual responsibilities such as studying and homework to go throw a frisbee with friends. he valued true happiness. “joy – the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life. we are not talking about satisfaction either—this can detract from joy” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau week three). i remember paul came to me for help with his faith life. he really wanted to improve his life for the better and i think he had this emptiness despite his always outward appearance of happiness. paul was yearning for joy, not just satisfaction. he was chasing after long lasting happiness rather than his quick bursts of temporary satisfaction that he thought was pure and true happiness. don’t even get me started on paul's beginning of searching for happiness. within the first week of college he switched majors and by the second week he wanted to drop out to do youtube. “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau week four). luckily, paul took advice, such as this quote, to heart, and stayed all four years. he got his degree in film and television and then did youtube. paul had this false idea of having to follow exact paths at college, without seeing that there are an infinite amount of paths in life regardless of what you study, where you go, etcetera. paul was very confused in his freshman year of college, like most of us. nobody is expected to have life figured out at 18. he really had to discern and reflect and think about a life well-lived. his mom helped guide him the most and gave him wisdom that she acquired throughout her life. the most important lesson that paul learned from his mama was to keep god close. “life is easier with god on your side” is something she would always say. she really helped lead paul towards a life of goodwill and faith in god. his upbringing in the catholic faith worked as the first building block to establish his entire life in faith. (discernment conversation activity moreau week 5). throughout paul’s life i would not say he was the most selfless person in the world, but he also wasn’t the most selfish. paul really cared about those who were close to him. i will say, he lacked sympathy towards people he did not know and he was very judgemental, but the thing about paul is he knew he was judgemental. he knew he held grudges. he acknowledged his weaknesses and wanted to change. it was just very hard. “so i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by aria swarr moreau week 6). i remember he would always say, “when i’m a millionaire then i’ll help a bunch of people.” one message that i know he would have wanted me to relay is to live life to the fullest with what you have. it is impossible to live to the fullest when you are always needing more to be to the fullest. life is hard and life is tough, but life is a game. the goal is to get to heaven. paul loved the game of life. he loved the fact that he would be dead one day and nobody would remember him. this message seems bleak but he loved that life was meant to be lived by each person in their own unique way. on the topic of paul’s love for life is his love for those closest to him. paul would continuously go out of his way to please his family and friends, such as buying joseph chick-fil-a knowing it is his favorite fast food. paul wanted to unite america, not divide. he was all for compromise and was always in favor of discussion rather than debate. “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the "culture of waste," which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week 7). i leave you with that quote because we all need to honor paul’s memory by going above and beyond ourselves and our inner circle. we need to love everybody. paul, i love you. i will miss you. integration 3 benjamin loyd 24 february 2022 moreau integration 3 what do i want to be remembered for i chose this title because this is the first time i will be digging deep into what i truly want to be remembered for. i would say i am a person who likes to self-reflect and dig deeper to find root causes. a couple of weeks ago, i got hit with the news that i would no longer be on the baseball team here at the university of notre dame. it was shocking and devastating to hear the news. however, i was most upset about not being around my friends and teammates every day with whom i have been building a relationship with for around eight to nine months. this is making me question, "how did i leave an imprint on them? was it a good one? a bad one?" i hope it was a good one. we all have days where we are out of it or aren't feeling okay. even though we were playing baseball, it was bigger than that. the friendships and memories run deep. i would say i tried my best athletically with the limited opportunities. for me, it is not always about baseball. for me, it's usually how i can make a positive impact on others around me. i would constantly tell my teammates to relax and have fun. it is hard at the moment not to be mad or upset at yourself after performing at the level you know you can, but it is not the end of the world. you will get a shot again one day, as long as you remain consistent. maybe not from this coach or team, but from someone who believes in you. this whole experience made me realize that everything is temporary and truly trying to live in the moment. if i had known it would have been my last time on the field or in the locker room with those guys, i would have soaked it up even more and taken a step back, and enjoyed it a little extra, but that is now in the past, and now it is time for my next journey. after the news, there felt like there was a hole because, at that moment, i couldn't play baseball anymore. it was frightening. not being able to play something you have been doing for so long is a scary moment, especially when it comes unexpectedly and is not ready to be done. this brings up week 5 when conversing with my mother, and she said what i value most is family and my faith. the next step is tough deciding to transfer schools. i am overwhelmed with uncertainty and questions of if i should stay closer to home or go far away. i will see what it brings and continue to trust god in this process. however, these next few months, i get a break from coaching and know myself as a person and player. in week one, there was a quote by pico lyer that said, "it's precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break." baseball and school anywhere are tough, but at notre dame, it is challenging, and i had to learn to manage time. so now that i have more flexibility, i can take breaks and rest whenever i choose, which is important. i will tell you one thing i don't want to be remembered for being a good baseball player. i talked with a person in compliance this past week, and she asked why i wanted to enter the transfer portal, and i responded because i still want to play baseball. she understood and said she got it because the sport is my identity. it was something small within the conversation, but it resonated with me. i wanted to correct her and say no. my identity is found in christ, but that would most likely turn out awkward. so many athletes and people, including myself, get caught up in their sport and what they are good at, but that is not who you are. you are more than what lies between the lines. it took me a while to think and realize this. so what do i want to be written on my tombstone? i want to be known as a person who always tried their best with anything they did. a person who was a good friend, teammate, son, brother, dad, grandpa, etc. someone who always thought of others first. a man who preached and tried to spread the gospel of jesus. it is so much deeper than that, though. in "three key questions," father himes says that "we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we can be!" i hope one day i can obtain all of those traits. how do i define a life well-lived? i say a life well-lived is to experience a bundle of feelings, good and bad, become at peace with your thoughts, do what makes you happy, and thank god for your blessings. i heard this quote, and it said to be at peace doesn't mean you are in a place with no noise, trouble, or suffering, but to be in the midst of those things and be calm in your heart. in week 6, the article "the right way to be introspective (yes, there is a wrong way)" explains that we as humans eagerly pounce on whatever 'insights' we find without questioning their validity or value." i deal with anxiety, and i sometimes realize during, but more so after an anxiety attack, that the brain likes to jump to false conclusions. we believe thoughts that are not usually true. in those feelings, i tend to try and fight myself and the anxiety. i tend to judge myself and ask myself, why are you like this? how could it have happened this bad? i was so good for so long. now i am trying to take a deep breath and sit there in mindfulness. do not judge me for feeling this way. in the chapter "jurisdiction," father greg boyle says at the end, "our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love." this is a powerful quote that i need to remember every time i am experiencing a tough mental day. what is okay not to be okay. i am god's child, and he loves me. the way i am. so what do i mean when i say, experience a bundle of feelings? i mean, feel your feelings no matter what they are and learn how to deal with them healthily. in his film, father hesburgh said that “there is meaning in suffering'' in his film when his sister passed away that "there is meaning in suffering ."so try to soak in every moment you can. the butterflies you get when you're with that special somebody, or the excitement you get seeing family you haven't seen for a while. in week four, when talking about career options, i came across the quote, "the only way to know more about yourself is to test the water just get out and experience life!" it is easier said than done. it is hard to step out of your comfort zone and try new things, but who knows, maybe the thing you are scared to try or do can be something you fall in love with. tomorrow is never promised. treat everybody with the kind of love you would want to be shown. forgive others. has christ not forgiven you when you have sinned? then why would you not try to forgive someone who has hurt you? lastly, what would be observable signs that i lived a life well-lived? the only sign is trying. as long as you are still on this earth and giving it all you have to be happy and positively impact others, you are living a well-lived life. sources: “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer week 1 “hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley week 2 “three key questions” by father michael himes week 3 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development week 4 “discernment conversation activity” by moreau week 5 “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich week 6 “tattoos on the heart” “jurisdiction” by father greg boyle week 7 integration 3 integration 3 moreau fye spring 2022 spreading her lessons to everyone always knew that during the time which she passed, she would want people to recount her root beliefs and describe how she inhabited a life well-lived. we all know she believed in creating authentic, vulnerable relationships with others to allow for stronger connections and friendships. with these friendships, she was able to spread her messages to others to overall make the world a better place. what exactly were her messages? sofia wanted these lessons to be shared one last time so everyone could finally hear where she got them all from. she thinks it is important to share who and where she learned the way to live a life well-lived to hopefully show them how to do the same. to begin, we can all acknowledge that sofia knew this day would come. she always knew it was inevitable. with this being said, she always took time to pause. life can move a million miles per hour unless we stop to breathe. the need for a breath in time was an item sofia was always sure to follow. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyermoreau fye week one). obviously, sofia strongly connected with this quote due to her love for music. she always said that without the rest in music, there would be no rhythm or character. still, there is a particular motif that she always tried to spread to others that stems from this quote. sofia believes that people don’t understand how little we need. it is true…there is so little that we need but our minds are always in a rush to think ahead to everything we must accomplish or what we think we need. we want so many https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ things, we think that we need so much to happen at rapid speed. nevertheless, especially during this time, sofia would want us to take a break, a pause, a breath, in order to slow down and appreciate everything that is currently in front of us in our lives. continuing on to other lessons sofia wants to spread to others for prospering a life well-lived stems from a place closely connected to where she attended college at the university of notre dame. a quote from a movie she had to watch all the way back to when she attended this university says, “...it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh film , produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week two). everyone knows that sofia was proud of her failures. anyone that attended school or worked with her would know that she used her failures as a place where she could learn the most. whenever she would see others be down on themselves, she was a constant reminder that failure is success. through failure, you learn more about yourself while teaching how to be resilient. with this being said, sofia was always sure to teach others to teach themselves rather than be down on themselves with failure. she was always a place where anyone could go to discuss how to grow. i am sure everyone can also say that helping others grow, made her grow as well. on the topic of failure and how sofia viewed them, it can be said that she also found obstacles to be just as important as failures. it is funny to say that obstacles and failures are important, but this is exactly what she believed. in the beginning of her life, sofia did not master the art of responding to obstacles. over time, she learned how to navigate through them. however, there were many times where she found herself thinking it was the end of the world when encountering a simple problem. she was a very futuristic thinker which resulted in believing that every single decision she made would affect her entire future as a whole. she has https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/auth/login.aspx mentioned that her perspective shifted after realizing that your problems only have the effect your responses create. in other words, a problem is only a problem if you make it one. she learned to obtain ways of coping and responding to challenges by dr. kim (5 minutes , by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). he learned how to change his disadvantages by looking at what he could do in the present. sofia experienced times where her problems forced her to ruminate on pure negativity rather than allowing herself to see what is in front of her. additionally, everyone knows that she made a huge change in her life at notre dame. being a part of the rcia program, she was able to grow in her faith. with this being said, she aspired to use prayer the way dr. kim did. he prayed for others if he was not for himself and in her experience, praying for others always made her end up feeling better. when you pray, hope, and wish good things onto other people, you feel better in the end. discussing sofia seeing the growth in others also sparks her ability to see what others do well. in college, sofia had a difficult time deciding a major. the moreau first experience course says it well: “ “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (navigating your career journey, by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). as sofia was able to show us in her lifetime, your major definitely does not define you to one specific job the rest of your life. she bounced around all over and covered a wide variety of different occupations! she showed us to understand patience and how to have trust that everything will work out. she constantly reminded her friends in college there is no “best major”, instead, she helped them discover what was the “best major for them.” always giving her best to help others discern was where she got her joy. speaking of when she received joy from others, a specific moment from her past left a mark on her soul and always acted as a constant reminder of who she was in others eyes. she had https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ a conversation with her mother where her mom showed her the role an outside person plays in discernment (week 5 discernment conversation activity). sofia was the type of person where self awareness was always being stretched, but after her mother told her she always saw her “in the zone” when participating in community service or being a student, sofia’s eyes widened. from that point on, she was able to truly see that she did indeed flourish in these aspects. she noticed the importance of the role others play when going down the path of life. therefore, she made it her priority to help others on their path as well. she understood the impact her mom made on her that day and she was committed to playing that role for others as well. relationships that fill you with confidence and build you up are ones you should keep. for sofia, some specific characteristics to a relationship well-lived is acceptance, tenderness, and the ability to communicate. when you can communicate well, you are able to express how you feel and discuss your jurisdictions and feelings to the ones you trust. afterall, she believed that “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone moreau fye week seven). the need for others' creativity and surrounding ourselves with others provides a sense of hope. sofia knows that every individual can have hope but a group of people who have hope creates the idea of “us” having hope. this “us” creates a revolution and it is this revolution that is able to guide us down the path of humility. she always believed that with humility and tenderness, people have positive power to change the world. sofia wants us to make relationships where we are able to surround ourselves with others in order to have the power to create a kind and good future. obviously, this has been a lot of continuing on about what sofia has brought to the world. with this being said, to end her eulogy, it must be discussed how she viewed the end. “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (meet the nun who https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html wants you to remember you will die, moreau fye week three). there once was a time where sofia did indeed think that everyday, we as humans must simply push through and get through our hours in order to get through our days, weeks, months, and years. in other words, she used to think our lives were just “continuing” on some imaginary timeline. sofia became a firm believer that having the ability to intentionally think about our own deaths every day, slowly allows for the appreciation of the present and focus for the future. with practicing death, we eventually will be able to find meaning and focus on what really matters to us as individuals. the “excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” fate of death was something sofia found to be life changing. while talking about the true meaning of joy and how to pursue that joy, one must know their horizons and perceptions. sofia viewed the inevitable fate of death to provide a more positive and more focussed view on what exactly those perceptions and horizons are. with this all being said, sofia lived a life well-lived because she was happy. she may have had to learn what makes her happy or ponder on discernments in order to get there, but once she began to live by the values stated here today, everything became more clear…and i am sure she is happy that everyone else can hear these values today too. she would want the rest of the world to know how and what makes a life well-lived. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html the life and relationships of mark hennin the life of mark hennin was one defined by his relationships with others, rather than his accomplishments or achievements, because relationships were what was most important to him. being able to spend time with his friends and family were more important to him than anything else in his life, and regardless of his accomplishments, that time spent was what defined how well-fulfilled his life truly was. mark always believed that relationships were crucial to living a life well-lived, because they allow the give and take that is necessary for life. having someone there to listen to your issues and emotions, and also being there to console and advise someone else on their problems are keys to any good relationship, and is something that mark believed everyone needed in life. the idea can best be summarized with the quote, “i wish i had a magic wand to pass over your pain.” (“tattoos on the heart: the power of boundless compassion” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven) having someone there to empathize with you in your problems is what everyone needs in life, and what mark valued a lot. while mark valued his time with others greatly, he never took for granted the time he spent alone. self-reflection was a key part to mark’s life, and it allowed him to control his stress by taking a step back and evaluate everything that was happening in his busy life. as pico iyer says, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) this idea was something that mark lived his life by, and it allowed him to destress and achieve all of the great things he did before he passed away. one of the things mark was well known for was stepping out of his comfort zone. whether it was with his career choices, meeting new people, or simply trying new hobbies, mark would never shy away from new opportunities in his life. as dr. donald super wrote, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by dr. donald super moreau fye week four) mark followed these ideas within his own life, as he switched majors early in his college career at notre dame, and even later in his career when he switched career paths. mark was never afraid of a new challenge because he believed that new challenges are how one fulfills their life. one major challenge that mark faced throughout his life was stress. while he valued self-reflection as a great way to relieve stress, he noted that there were some times when self-reflection still didn’t do the trick, given how much he had on his plate. it reminds me of a finding that explains this very idea. “but to my astonishment, our data told the exact opposite story. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) while mark wasn’t a self-absorbed or depressed person, it was clear that he dealt with a lot of stress in his life. he mentioned that when self-reflection didn’t help him, he turned to his relationships for guidance. his parents were always just a phone call away to help him in times of need, and talking to them allowed him to relieve his stress and regain the confidence he needed to be successful. an aspect of mark’s life that he was most proud of was his work in creating equal opportunities within the business world. inspired by a quote describing the work of a domer dozen nominee named jessica pedroza, which read, “now, as a legislative assistant in the office of rep. ruben gallego (az), pedroza works to help advance just national k-12 educational policy that ensures students have access to a high quality education, fully funded schools, and diverse teachers.” (“notre dame alumni association’s “domer dozen”” by jessica pedroza moreau fye week two) inspired by pedroza’s work within the education industry, mark created equal opportunity programs within the business world that provided students from low-income communities with unique internship and career opportunities in business. one relationship mark valued above all was the relationship he had with his father. the two were very similar in nature, competitive, driven, and goofy. they shared many of the same interests and were always very close. mark’s father knew mark had so many talents and thus set a high standard for him, whether that was in school, sports, or his career. mark talks about this in a reflection of a conversation he had with his father, where he writes, “the other part of the conversation that i felt had great significance was when i asked my dad what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear and he told me that he was very proud of me. this wasn’t a big shock to me, but i really did need to hear that. my dad does a great job of pushing me to achieve my goals, but often times, i feel like i don’t meet his expectations because he sets them so high.” (“discernment conversation activity” by mark hennin moreau fye week 5) mark realized that even if it isn’t said a lot, his father would always be proud of him, and he mentioned that if his father hadn’t set such a high bar for him early in life, he wouldn’t have truly lived life to his full potential. while mark’s father played a big role in his successes in life, that doesn’t mean that there weren’t others who helped him as well. mark mentioned that anyone ranging from his friends, family, coaches, to even teachers helped push him in the right direction in his life, and without them, he wouldn’t have lived the life he did. it is reminiscent of a quote from fr. michael himes that says, “look for the task that will continue to stretch you. that’s all important in discerning that really vital vocation in one’s life. are you continuing to grow? to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.).” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes, moreau fye week three) mark attributed these relationships to much of his success and happiness in life. overall, what mark wanted us to understand about his life was that in order to truly have a life well lived, you need to have relationships and value those relationships, just as he did. moreau integration three (3/3/22) kurama 1 3/3/2022 moreau integration three a life well lived during my third semester at notre dame, i have been exposed to a variety of new experiences that have made me question and define what a “life well-lived” means to me. through being exposed to new environments and being encouraged to reflect on these deep questions, i have begun to further develop my beliefs and ideologies in many regards. moreau has helped me in recognizing and documenting some of these changes that i would not have otherwise noticed. for example, there are many interpersonal changes that i have undergone already that moreau has helped me notice within myself. in this essay, i will discuss how some of the moreau class material has impacted my understanding of what a “life well-lived” means for me. i will aim to share my thoughts while connecting to the moreau class material from this semester. i will aim to seek greater clarity in my life through trying to get a better understanding of what some of the bare essentials are. the quote, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (iyer, 2014) stood out to me because i believe that this idea is often overlooked. from my experience, whenever society or various communities are faced with challenges, one of the first approaches is to look and see what is lacking and what additional resources can be provided to suppress/approach the problem. however, oftentimes it is overlooked that maybe the most straightforward solution is to refocus and aim for concentrated simplicity. i think that in order to better understand the kinds of lives that we as members of society lead, we need to understand the bare essential factors that are required to strive towards our goals. through these readings it is implied that by overcomplicating various factors in an attempt to solve problems, we may unintentionally bog down these necessities and lose focus on what truly matters. instead, if we were to approach every problem with a clear focus and not stray too far from the central goals then we would not overcomplicate, and hence we would lead more meaningful and prosperous lives. i believe that one of the ways in which we can live a more prosperous and fulfilling life is to connect with others on a more personal and interconnected level and experience a wide range kurama 2 of moments/emotions. the quote, “...you learn there is meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith, but in the end i found strength, and as a priest i wanted to help others find their own strength, even in the greatest of suffering” (hesburgh film) stood out to me in the whole film because of its deeper meaning on the understanding of what inspires some to live lives that they believe to be fulfilling. oftentimes, in order to understand others on a more personal level, it requires that you first experience similar emotions in order to truly understand the pains, excitements, etc. otherwise, these support systems are shallow and feel more disconnected and artificial. i think that in order to better understand what inspires some people to live a fulfilling life we must experience a wide range of emotions/situations. i think there is tremendous value in the uncomfortable…living through times that are tough in one way or another challenges to heal in many ways that we had not previously believed to have been possible. through these experiences we will be able to connect with more people on a meaningful and more personal level, and ultimately live a more prosperous and fulfilling life in doing so. i think that it is important to ask questions that help us to understand what our true motivations are. the quote, “sister aletheia rejects any suggestion that the practice is morbid. suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (ruth graham, ny times) stood out to me for many reasons. i both agree and disagree with the ideas presented in this article. i also believe that there is a lot of truth in the idea that facing what we find to be intimidating or daunting/dark is where we usually end up finding the “light.” however, i also believe that thinking about death every day may create some paranoia and lead people to believe that each day is a race against the clock. while i see what the idea is that this article is trying to portray, i think that it would be much more effective to just acknowledge the concept of death and to use it as one of many motivators for good…not necessarily as something that must be remembered each and every day. i think that in order to better understand what questions lead a life well-lived, we must first understand what values motivate ourselves and those around us. ultimately, it is these various motivations, whether tied together with emotions, thoughts, ideas, etc…, that make each day meaningful. with this in mind, even a day “wasted” with intention is a meaningful day because kurama 3 of intentions of doing so. i believe that it is not necessarily what we do with our lives, but that we do what we do with intention, righteousness, and what makes us more happy and content. i think that it is important to ask questions about what we can do or don’t do each day that could help us each strive towards our goals more effectively. the quote “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (meruelo family center for career development) stood out to me because i think that there is a lot of truth to it. “textbook thinking”, anticipation, and planning can only help so much. there comes a point where the most effective way to understand and learn more about certain factors of yourself is to get out there and put yourself in uncomfort in the real world. people learn from experiencing things first hand themselves, not so much just hearing it from other people. i think that some ways of living a life well lived is to just get out there and get started. i think oftentimes, people get discouraged to get out there and try something new because of the uncomfort, responsibility, or other unattractive factors involved. however, many times this is the only way to seek new opportunities or strengthen existing ones. i think as a society, we have grown too accustomed to the relative comfort of life and don’t spend time thinking about how we can utilize the resources available the best we can in order to lead a life well-lived. furthermore, one thing that personally stretched my awareness of myself was when in the conversation from week 5, we talked about my ability to find happiness in almost any situation. i would consider myself a pretty hopeful person as i am always looking for the positive things about certain situations. in other words, even when it is most dark, i always try to turn towards the light. it was also interesting to hear another person’s perspective on my strengths as a person. things that i usually overlook or don’t consider to be important strengths were things that were brought up in the conversation. it made me realize how easy it is to overlook all of the positive subtleties in the midst of day-to-day stresses and anxieties. i think that the best way to understand this is to first outline methods/techniques to identify and address obstacles within our everyday lives. the quote “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) resonated with me because it just shows that self-reflection can require some practice and focus/knowledge of what to be looking out for/reflecting on before kurama 4 it is very effective. i think that with some structure, self-reflection can be a really helpful tool for self-improvement in a variety of aspects. also, self-reflection can be a recovery/mental health resource as it can potentially even have positive mental health benefits with reflection and looking to the positive/constructive side of things. i think that some ways to recognize and evaluate personal obstacles to living a life well-lived is to first self-reflect meaningfully and effectively. strive to associate yourself with people around you whom you enjoy spending time around – groups that help to raise one another up. self reflecting effectively can have a great moral satisfaction if done well, as it can incite even further motivations to pursue goals and perform well. this cycle of reflections and motivations will aid in identifying and addressing the obstacles that may inhibit a life well-lived. therefore, it is crucial to understand the importance of self-reflection, and techniques to best go about doing so. i think that in regards to relationships that are characteristic of a life well-lived, an understanding of what kinds of relationships that we currently have and value is very important to recognize (and whether or not we are content with those relationships). the quote “why them and not me…” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) stood out to me because it just shows that many times for some reason or another life is not fair and equal for everyone, and that almost always some people can be seen in more advantageous positions than others. oftentimes, this can leave us wondering what it truly means to be in certain positions, and what responsibilities/factors come with being in certain situations. also, i think that this concept in-and-of-itself warrants a clarification of the definitions of what some of the more advantageous positions may be. for example, some people may view certain things to be attractive while others may think otherwise. ultimately, it is important to understand where we as individuals fit in the context of the societies around us and hence what our responsibilities/objectives/goals in each position must be. i think ultimately this concept of evaluating personal advantages/positioning in life compared to others around us can be very obscure in definition (since it can change with each person’s beliefs on certain ideals), but very powerful in context of where we are in our communities/societies as individuals and what responsibilities/goals we should be striving to fulfill given our current circumstances. also, as pope francis explained, this idea of “why them and not me…” further shows the importance of how the future worth building must include everyone. each person is just one placeholder, one piece in the giant puzzle that is our collective future and betterment. therefore, it is essential to understand our kurama 5 current place in society, and how to best move forward that benefits the collective interests of humanity as a whole. ultimately, throughout this semester i have learned a lot and have been exposed to a variety of new experiences. i have begun to further develop my beliefs and ideologies in many regards, and moreau has helped me to identify some of these changes and how they have impacted my current definition of a “life well-lived.” kurama 6 works cited "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three "navigating your career journey" by muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week four "the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzldbuiweivfjfj94oqqkbygsuwrirftvni92bvkjbowsdyux2nh7eta%2f%2famwsmsrdhmnppneeqybyxydo6gh%2bgpa3lbajlju6yo46yy1ge8ho3c4qsysiihzzjuulat0ahmixsw%2faflcvwmdakybsuidlaanntoh%2blbiixtf7advawtky2jjl35y4klv1faukvlwtldgnm8ohnpkokq49iy3mn13hd3z6w1oguvbgfnpebjcjdwob2ttdkf1dp9unjzjo%2fsbmyjkpdelpijtoql1ozvsiho7ewsyhf9ioqwhzby%2ffc6uno%2fy53vaiupetqrkxcl2cx%2bryxhe8u1ictddpuh%2bcnmy4ifedie4xy1ds3yddhnvclvx%2fun2yf76idkoireikisw55f3%2f7ea%2fhemf%2fjxulikjmx4nq2msrlsd%2b7m28obd7ts8vlf%2fzl%2fffl8h2ezf%2fh9pr%2febkqgnhvc1flhbtvnonf0%2bdlrqxp%2flid7fy0%2bfxa9u93m78c&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=vplodss6bzyvc65nur9ai6gv7nauoj4orbyrtrhv1up%2fumdd3jt%2f6%2fhyugep%2ffiioppfqzmqd%2b%2flnwa3lp7ld8p%2bb4z4ze1rfrpnlu7mhha0uh8iqw74yoxiqqg4edequwie3hmxelgr%2b7jkpp4nqo%2bmcm4i6zpxvxre8rwmsn57dnvvyzub2azovr9%2b5bqohhlcdpeenfgutsibzumjg7sixgy0t45kpr9uamk4hm0x5jvkgxadiit2qz1ny9%2btm2p01jlls6rggl13eewkvjctgutrwanrbsrd9%2fpptb4e%2finakquta21i24gwbkpv2q90wlibr%2fypqibft4najg%3d%3d https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript nicholas langan professor chan moreau fye march 4 2022 the eulogy of nicholas langan my name is nicholas john langan, i am from cincinnati, ohio, and i am the person to which this eulogy will be referencing. before i say any more, i want to say that i know that there are many of you that i was not able to speak my full truth to, and to that i would like to apologize. we never really do have enough time in our lives, and i did try my best to form meaningful relationships along the way. but, for those who i was unable to develop an in-depth relationship with i am truly sorry. with that being said, i would like to address the way in which i attempted to live my life. one of the worst things that a person can do is to get as much done in as little time as possible. when someone moves through life too quickly, they can’t really enjoy all the little things. in my life, i believe that i was able to enjoy these little things. i think that i was able to analyze information and experiences that i went through, ensuring that i got the most out of every experience and never made the same mistake twice. in a ted talk from week 1 of moreau, pico iyer put it best saying, “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer ted talk – moreau fye week 1). personally, i couldn’t have said it better. throughout my life, i attempted to live by this principle of not focusing so much on how much you are able to do or how much information you can gather, but instead on the quality and depth to which you experience these things. i believe that i lived a life-well lived. i also believe that this is a very confusing topic for most. people always get confused at what exactly a life well lived is. is there a set standard? my moreau class at the university of notre dame provided me with the answer to this question. when looking at a list of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ important notre dame students and graduates who are making a difference in the world, i found a great quote about a man named matt conaghan. this quote stated, “conaghan leads the conception, creation, and promotion of marketing materials while also focusing on design and charity growth” (domer dozen featuring matt conaghan – moreau fye week 2). for matt, a life well-lived meant using his job and career to help those around him who needed it the most. for me, a life well-lived always meant helping those around me using the resources that i had. i believe that using all my resources, from my job to my friends, i was able to go out into the world and make a difference. to me, this characterized a life well-lived just like it did for matt. along with helping others, it is also imperative to challenge oneself. this means asking difficult questions that help you become the best version of yourself. for me, that question was, what brings me joy? i remember many times in my life when i struggled with this. i knew that joy was something more than just being happy, but what exactly was it and how was i to find it? in week 3 of my moreau class at the university of notre dame, i was reading michael himes’ article on the three key questions in life, and he gave a great definition of joy. he said that joy was “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (three key question by michael himes – moreau fye week 3). just like when i was trying to figure out what living a life well-lived meant, i realized once again that it was up to me. what brought me joy was completely determined by whether or not i was receiving a feeling of righteousness or not. like before, this made me realize that helping others brought me more joy than almost anything else. this is a major reason why i devoted so much of my time to the betterment of those around me. my best advice to whoever is reading this and is confused about what really brings them joy, think about what you feel in your heart. when you do something that truly brings you joy, you won’t just be happy. you will feel it in your heart. all i can say is follow your heart and you will never go wrong. https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ the idea of following your heart brings me to my next point. you have to know yourself before you can figure out what is truly going to bring you joy and lead to you living a life well-lived. this means that before you make any major decisions in life, “you have to know yourself first – your values, interests, personality, and skills” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). for me, i found that finding a peaceful place to just sit and relax allowed me to best discover myself. my favorite place to go was always the beach down the block from my house during sunsets. i would just stare at the horizons and take deep breathes and allow my mind to think freely. when i did this and wasn’t worrying about anything, i was able to discover what really mattered to me. those things being family, friends, and helping those in need. my number one value that i believed in was just spreading kindness and it was often in these peaceful moments that i was able to think of ways to spread this kindness. congruent with what i just said, getting to know yourself is incredibly important, but relationships with others is incredibly important as well. other people can inform you of things about yourself that you don’t even notice. i remember a specific conversation i had with my sister during my freshman year of college. i called her and was talking to her about what was going on in my life and after hearing all the things that i was worried about, she told me that i worry too much and that i need to relax and focus on the important things. she also told me that she was proud of the resilience that i showed through difficult times in my life like when i got shoulder surgery (moreau fye week 5). this conversation brought things to light about myself that i didn’t even realize. also, when we listen to others, positive things will come of it as well. throughout my life, i always attempted to have deep and meaningful conversations with my friends and family, and i feel as if these conversations gave me great insight into my own being that i might have not otherwise discovered. now i know that most people reading this are thinking that all this self-reflection is really easy to talk about, but actually finding time to do this in our busy lives seems difficult. what i found in my many https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ years is that it doesn’t take much time to successfully reflect on our lives. actually, “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). this seems directly contradictory to what most people think. how is it possible that the more time you spend thinking the less you learn about yourself? in my life, i learned that the more time that you spend thinking about yourself, the more you begin to overthink things. if you are constantly self-reflecting, people have the tendencies to begin to overthink and make assumptions about themselves that may not be entirely true. when i was younger, i would often overthink things and find myself worrying and confused about things that were very clear. i would self-reflect all the time, whether it was at night before i went to bed or in the morning on the car ride to school or work. later on in life, i learned that a very minimal amount of time for self-reflection was optimal because i only had enough time to address the matter which were most directly impacting my life. in this way i was able to get the most out of my self-reflection without overthinking trivial matters. beyond just connecting with ourselves, i found that forming relationships with others was one of the most important things that i did in my life. this can be a daunting task for many. for me, i found it quite simple. to best display how i approached this concept, i am going to use a quote from pope francis that says, “remember that the ‘other’ is not a statistic, or a number” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). this perfectly encapsulates who a person should try to make relationships with. everyone. what i learned in my life is that as humans, we need to try to make a relationship with nearly everyone that we meet. the seriousness of these relationships can vary, but to find total joy and happiness, it is imperative that we reach out to all of those around us. now i’m not saying that i was best friends with the person i saw walking their dog once a week in the neighborhood, but i most definitely stopped and talked to them every single time i passed. this is important because the next time that i see that person walking their dog, i receive a small https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcrip https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcrip sense of joy knowing that i am going to be able to have a conversation with them and smile, and if you can find joy in something, why avoid it? honestly, life is crazy. my life was crazy, your life is probably crazy, and everyone’s life is crazy. no one has ever said that it was going to be easy, but if you would like to look back on your life and feel as if you have lived a life well-lived, listen closely. first, use my advice to help you determine what a life well-lived really means to you. do some self-reflection and talk to those closest to you. once you discover what this life looks like, go out and live it. take initiative in life and go after what you want. make relationships, find joy, help others, and enjoy the ride because you only get to do it once. if i had to leave you as the reader with one phrase to help you live your best life, it would be to follow your heart in whatever you do and never give up on your dreams. moreau integration 4 march 2022 a man who worked for the future throughout many of our lives, we attempt to avoid mistakes and play life the safe way. brian was a man who did the opposite. he actively chose to fail because he wanted to learn as much as he could to overcome those failures. brian was well-known for his dedication to the grind of working out. many of you here can attest to seeing the stories he posted online of his late-night work out sessions. sometimes the fool would even work out when he was sick and coughing up phlegm. this is because he consistently kept his future self in mind. brian disciplined himself to hit the gym regardless of whether he felt like it or not, sometimes to the point where he would nearly pass out from exhaustion. when i saw him sprawled on the ground, i remember giving him advice i gleaned from pico iyer: “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives?” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). brian used this to become more productive in not only his workouts but also his homework by dialing down his rigor to incorporate days or times of rest to allow for his body and mind to recuperate. brian not only fought to reconcile his mind and body, but he also loved to bring others together oftentimes through humor. alan simpson’s description of father hesburgh sums it well, “he loved to watch people who didn’t agree on anything and get in a room and bridge all that” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). i remember two of brian’s closest dormmates joe ricotta and cole hougo who were often considered the worst roommate pair in dunne. brian was great friends with each and often talked to both of them about their issues with the other. he worked and reminded them to improve communication and acted as a mediator for their concerns. by the same token though, he always reminded them that despite his communication between the two, no one but them could finalize the solution. for them to grow together, brian taught them that communication and an understanding of the problem was key. father michael himes captures this idea by saying, “no one else can answer the question for you. they may be able to help you frame the question. in framing the question, one begins the process of answering it" (“three key questions?” by father michael himesmoreau fye week three). joe and cole went on to remedy their issues thanks to brian’s initial concern and desire to see two enemies become friends. this brings us back to the cheeriness we all knew brian embodied. in fact, brian’s strive for success was fueled by his ability remain happy at all times. his attitude on life contributed to his success academically, physically, and mentally. the meruelo family’s center for career development provides advice on life that brian took to heart: “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes” (“navigating your career journey?” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). this goes hand in hand with the fact that his ability to stay motivated in class enabled him to setup portals by which he could reach out to alumni of notre dame. the culmination of notre dame students and alumni on the irish compass website allows people to jumpstart their careers, just like brian aimed to do (“6 tips for making a career fresh start?” by irish compassmoreau fye week five). now, despite his consistent positive attitude, he wasn’t perfect. no not by any means. brian is a very sensitive man and although not many saw it, he sometimes struggled to keep his smile turned up even when he least felt like it. the reason he was able to move on is because he got to know himself through struggle. tasha eurich offers insight into introspection when he says that “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)?” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week six). tasha eurich isn’t discouraging people from self-reflecting at all, but rather not to over-do it. self-reflection is important to increase one’s self-awareness; however, all of that becomes useless if not acted upon. brian and his competitive nature always sought to improve and act upon his current state which is why he refused to be bogged down by negative thoughts. many feel that happiness is just not attainable, at least pope francis seems to think so. he said, “many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone?” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). pope francis explains that many often discount the ability to live a life well-lived. a happy life isn’t a life in which someone’s always happy. no, a happy life is one in which someone constantly searches for ways to improve and become the best version of their selves they can be because through work there is purpose. this is a concept many don’t grasp. ask anyone here, brian is the biggest procrastinator we know. he once put off and clutched a research paper for a biology class 45 minutes before it was due so that he could watch a bills game. however, brian was able to recognize his problems early and implement solutions to bring him on the right track. he pushed himself to schedule every hour of every day, he consistently works out 5 times a week, he became strict with his life so that life could become easier for him. brian lived for the future by working in the present so that he could improve on his past. his mindset is what propelled him into getting out of life what he wanted. he put in what he wanted to get out. this is why i hope we all look to brian and thank him for his impact on us and all the memories we made with him. finding the purpose of my life of all the existential questions, the one that comes to my mind most often is none other than the “purpose of my existence”. i'm still trying to figure out the meaning of my life. i always make sure i have a focal point on which to base my goals. following deresiewicz's quote “unless you know who you are, how you will figure out what you what to do with the rest of your life?”, it is essential to define who i am to find this central point on which i need to rely the meaning of my life one. aged only 19, i had the chance to experience various socio-cultural and economic realities while spending time in both the united states and in haiti. they are two totally different countries in terms of their social and economic realities. one is poor and the other one is rich. one is a great power and the other one is a third world country. one is politically stable and the other one is politically unstable. one has a high rate of insecurity, the other one has a more secure environment. of all these characteristics, haiti finds itself on the wrong side. however, if we take an approach where we analyze other less superficial elements such as the sense of community, i believe that haiti is better off compared to the united states. this can be seen in the words of william deresiewicz: “we have a crisis of leadership in america because our overwhelming power and wealth, earned under earlier generations of leaders, made us complacent, and for too long we have been training leaders who only know how to keep the routine going. who can answer questions, but don't know how to ask them. who can fulfill goals, but don't know how to set them. who think about how to get things done, but not whether they're worth doing in the first place. what we have now are the greatest technocrats the world has ever seen, people who have been trained to be incredibly good at one specific thing, but who have no interest in anything beyond their area of expertise. what we don't have are leaders”. one of the things i know about myself is that i have seen a lot." i have experienced a multitude of characteristics of human reality by living in communities with totally opposite social realities. in terms of immediate environment, i grew up in a family with complementary parents. my mother tried to make me understand the existence of god, and my father made me understand the reality of human life. from his experiences, i was able to get an idea of ​​the avarice of men as well as their bad faith. the immediate context in which i grew up, in addition with the breadth of different social contexts i have experienced, are the generators of my goals and convictions in life. i owe my faith in god to my mother, my character to my father, and my worldwide view to my experiences in haiti and the united states. i have the firm conviction that my objective on this earth must be directly related to the improvement of the republic of haiti. i know that this is a difficult task. it responds positively to the three questions of fr michael himes : “is this a source of joy? is this something that taps into my talents and gifts and uses them in the fullest way possible? is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” indeed, achieving such a task would give me a lot of joy and pride. i always tell myself that the biggest regret i could have in my entire life is to face the sad reality where i would have spent my whole life doing nothing to contribute to the development of haiti. i also believe that i have the “talents and gifts” to accomplish such a mission because i know perfectly the haitian reality on every aspect. it would be more than a genuine service to the people around me. a prosperous haiti would be beneficial to the community as a whole. i want to sacrifice my life “doing good for the haitian community”. i must think about how i will achieve my plan in a concrete way. i know i know that i have to be self-aware. if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives. also, keeping in mind what pope francis said, in order to do good, we need memory, courage and creativity, i am looking forward to embody those skills in my life. amongst them, the most important one that i have been facing recently is “courage”. the past two years have been really challenging to me. the socio-political and economic situation of haiti has fallen considerably. the terrible rate of insecurity created panic in the daily routine of all. in addition, political riots became commonplace and sometimes prevented me from going to school. despite everything, i was able to overcome these difficulties, with of course the help of my parents. when i had to leave haiti for my collegiate studies almost a year ago, the adaptation was not at all easy. my courage has been greatly tested. this situation has not yet come to an end, but i will do my best to improve it. in terms of creativity, i believe that the different social settings i have had the chance to experience have created in me a certain capacity to try to adapt to any environment. in terms of memory, in my opinion, this implies an awareness of the context of the environment where one wants to do good. in my case, i grew up in haiti, i know the history of this country, my father was involved in politics. therefore i know perfectly the history of this people and i can thus have an idea of ​​the solutions which have already failed in the past while trying to change haiti. i don't know what the future holds for me, but i'm proud that my life has gone this way so far and i will try to stick firmly to my goals and beliefs. integration three dot crumlish alison thigpen moreau first-year experience 4 march 2022 a eulogy for the living “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” (‘meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die’ by ruth grahammoreau first year experience week 3). these are the words of sister aletheia. whenever something was going arye, dot would always remind others of a similar sentiment, and i think in these sad times it is important for us to remember the same thing. a lot of times people try to hide from the bad or darker parts of life, however inevitable they might be, and only show the “bright and shiny” parts. so, although it is hard, let us not try to ignore the fact that dot is no longer with us, but rather embrace it, and look back on her life well lived. from a young age, dot always loved learning how things worked and designing new things, and always wanted to be an inventor. this meant that a lot of people expected her to become an architect when she grew up, but as we all know now, she did not. while she always felt a pressure to become an architect, she instead became an engineer. her life shows us all that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” (navigating your career journey by nd moreau first year experience week 4). if she had not decided to do what she wanted rather than what others expected her to do, she would not have flourished to the same extent in the world, and brought her talents to life in the same way as she did. just look around us at all the things she designed! https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ people would always ask her how she got everything done while still having free time to spend time with others. a lot of us think to ourselves, “if i take time off, i somehow believe, i’ll be that much more hurried the rest of the time” (‘why we need to slow down our lives’ by pico iyer moreau first year experience week 1). when there’s a lot on our plates, i know i am unsure about how i’m going to get it all done, and then i just become more anxious because i don’t feel i even have the time to sit down and plan it out. dot would always tell me to sit down and take a break, and she was always right. it always helps me upon my return to the work because i have fresh eyes and can think more clearly. i think dot did this a lot, and is one of the reasons why she was not just successful in life careerwise, but also emotionally and in her relationships. she always seemed to have a new hobby hoing on, from crochet to origami to baking to playing a new instrument. while from the outside it seemed she was always going in every direction with her activities and pursuits, she was always headed forward with a singular value at her core: to bring joy to others, and make the world a better place for them. “whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living” (father hesburg movie moreau first year experience week 2). ever since her freshman year of college in her moreau class, she always admired father ted and this quote in particular. father ted lived this idea out, doing everything from assisting in the civil rights movement to managing the university, and he always stuck to his values even when people were angry at him. dot always tried to do the same, even when others made it hard, she always strove to do what she felt was right and would help others. anyone who interacted with dot knows she did her best to do this. there were many things in the world that she cared very deeply about and wanted to change, especially the earth https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 and stopping climate change. she did not care about it just for herself but wanted the earth to be around for future generations. it made her sad how poorly humans have taken care of it. rather than standing around and doing nothing, waiting for things to change, she took action into her own hands, as we can all see through her inventions, which completely changed the world of sustainability (conversation moreau first year experience week 5). although dot responding to texts always seemed to be a rarity, it was never because she did not care, it was always because she cared too much. she loved interacting with people in person, seeing and hearing their authentic reactions and emotions. a very introverted person, she always strove to form meaningful relationships with others, not just the superficial ones many of us see on a daily basis. she never wanted to fall into the ‘culture of waste’ that pope francis once discussed in a tedtalk, “which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people” (pope francis ted talk moreau first year experience week 7). you would rarely see her walking around with headphones in, or looking at her phone. she wanted to embrace all she could in the world, everyone around her. next time we are walking around with headphones in, let’s take them out. we are all guilty of trying to make connections through our phones, we fail to see the opportunities for making others feel welcome and not alone in the real world. overall, dot was never an avoider. however difficult, she learned through her life to not ignore her feelings. she was one of the most self-aware people i knew. she wanted to be her truest self possible, and “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (‘the https://docs.google.com/document/d/1sa0eahnmp2eu9eh-8lqhmi04x6kbwtgwr31ru6r6kvu/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ right way to be introspective’ by tasha eurich moreau first year experience week 6). a really important distinction for us all that i know i had never thought of before. dot lived a life like no other, and i think we can all agree that it was a life well-lived. i would like to finish with an excerpt from john green’s the anthropocene reviewed. not only was this dot’s favorite piece of writing, but she also returned to it time and time again when life posed a challenge, and i think its message is one that she truly took to heart, and we all can, too: “at the end of his life, the great picture book author and illustrator maurice sendak said on the npr show fresh air, ‘i cry a lot because i miss people. i cry a lot because they die, and i can’t stop them. they leave me, and i love them more.’ he said, ‘i’m finding out as i’m aging that i’m in love with the world.’ it has taken me all my life up to now to fall in love with the world, but i’ve started to feel it the last couple of years. to fall in love with the world isn’t to ignore or overlook suffering, both human and otherwise. for me anyway, to fall in love with the world is to look up at the night sky and feel your mind swim before the beauty and the distance of the stars. it is to hold your children while they cry, to watch as the sycamore trees leaf out in june. when my breastbone starts to hurt, and my throat tightens, and tears well in my eyes, i want to look away from feeling. i want to deflect with irony, or anything else that will keep me from feeling directly. we all know how loving ends. but i want to fall in love with the world anyway, to let it crack me open. i want to feel what there is to feel while i am here. sendak ended that interview with the last words he ever said in public: ‘live your life. live your life. live your life.’ here is my attempt to do so.” https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ moreau integration moreau integration 3 catherine wagner going all in was a man unlike many in this world. he dedicated his life to his family, friends, and those around him. although he had money, ryan by no means led a life of ease and comfort. while he enjoyed comfort in the form of family and friends, he relentlessly pursued personal growth and challenges in the world. today we honor the death of that man, and remember a life well lived. during his upbringing, ryan found many of the close friends that he is still with to this day. those relationships were the foundation of both his personal and professional successes. his sister emily still remembers conversations that they enjoyed discussing his future with him. she said that he valued people, that he was at his very best when he was solving problems (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). ryan believed that his relationships were the most important things in his life. he lived this out by always being a loyal friend and a loving family member. during his childhood, his friends recall a shift in his behavior as he grew older. as a small child, he would frequently mess with other kids, but as he grew older, everyone could see that he valued interactions with everyone and anyone. ryan believed that “each and every everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). he lived out this value throughout his life by creating meaningful relationships within the context of work, with friends of his children’s parents, and also with those younger than him. he strove to always champion the rights of the downtrodden and those who were disadvantaged. for this reason, he often volunteered at the local food pantry. as he moved on to college, ryan learned what it meant to live a meaningful life at the university of notre dame. his catholic faith and values were strengthened by both continued https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript mass at the university and the value based education that the university promoted. ryan was inspired by notre dame legends like father hesburg. the emphasis that father hesburg placed on courage in all aspects of life was reflected in how he acted afterwards (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). ryan constantly displayed courage by choosing paths that were difficult, but right. he stood up for injustice where he saw it and applied his wealth to make meaningful changes. it was at college also that ryan learned to slow down and appreciate the little things in life. he found peace at his childhood camp on otisco lake (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). for him and his family, it was a sanctuary of peace where all the problems of the outside world drifted away. those summer days with cousins and siblings returned ryan to that joy of childhood that sparkles in the eyes of so few. by keeping this place close to his heart, ryan retained that spark throughout his old age. ryan also learned how to grow while at college. he learned the art of reviewing his past correctly and accepting things for what they are, not what he wants them to be. by looking at his past for “what” happened and not looking too deeply at why, ryan was able to maintain a sense of peace about past regrets and not spiral into that introspective cycle (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). in this way, ryan was able to learn from his past mistakes while not dwelling in regret. on his deathbed, he claimed that he had no regrets because all his mistakes made him who he was. as a professional, few can say that they matched ryan’s passion for his work and helping others through business. his talents in venture capital included the technical analysis of companies as well as the soft skills to manage relationships with clients. he got a deep sense of joy from the work, and this was reflected in his performance (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). as a venture capitalist, ryan was able to help those with brilliant ideas receive financing and market their products to the world. he truly made the world a better place by choosing ethical companies with solutions for modern problems. his success in the field can largely be accredited to his trying many different things in his life https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 (“navigating your career journey by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week four). during his twenties, he founded many different companies with varying degrees of success. however, his failures never held him back, they only promoted him to do better in the future. ryan always was grateful for failing in business because it's the only thing that actually made him learn in the field. he applied these lessons to future investments and brought the best out of younger entrepreneurs by mentoring them and teaching them the tricks of the trade. ryan always had a zest for creation, and he fulfilled his dream of owning his company, all while helping others achieve their dreams. ryan’s life truly was well lived. he went all in on life and squeezed it for all it had to offer him. by placing people as his primary focus, ryan enjoyed the love of all those around him, because he gave them all the love he had to offer them. ryan’s family, friends, and coworkers trusted ryan for his advice and loyalty over the years. on a personal level, he lived to get better each and every day. those one percent improvements compounded to make him an unstoppable force for good in this world. as a professional, he helped those that were less fortunate than him and accomplished the big goals that he laid out for himself. to the passing of a truly good man, we honor you . https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ moreau writing week 14 (capstone integration) nuss 1 thigpen moreau fye 29 april 2022 the pursuit of a life well lived my mission is to be the change i want to see in the world. i seek to make the most out of every day, achieve my goals, and reach my full potential so that my life is well-lived. i will see every setback as a challenge to be overcome, and an opportunity to learn and grow. i seek to show respect to every person that i meet, and treat others the way i would want to be treated. i also want to be sincere and honest with my friends and family. as a student, i seek to learn and become knowledgeable in a specific area of study. i intend to choose a career path that is suited for my interests and talents, so that i will work effectively and efficiently. i want to use my skills, knowledge, and wisdom to help others and make a positive impact on the world. i intend to adhere to my personal morals and beliefs throughout my life, and to turn to them as a guide during tough situations. i want to be courageous and to stand up for my beliefs, even if it is an uphill battle. i want to be a person that inspires others to make a positive difference in the world. in order for my mission statement to effectively animate my life over the next three years, i must prioritize my morals and ideals and avoid unimportant distractions. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). by stepping away from technology and social media, i can slow down my life and take the time to do things that are important to me or helpful for others. i found the life of father theodore hesburgh to be very inspirational and a good example of a life well lived. he played a crucial role in many of the historical events of his time, primarily because “he didn’t really belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” (quote from “hesburgh” by ted koppel moreau fye week two). like fr. hesburgh, i plan to allow my https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 nuss 2 morals and my mission statement to guide my actions rather than anger, frustration, or other strong emotions that may skew my judgment. in my mission statement, i noted that i wanted to find a career that suited my interests and talents so that i would be able to effectively help people. this was inspired by the three key questions presented by fr. michael himes that are designed to help people make difficult decisions when it comes to career choices. these questions prompt people to ask themselves what interests them, what they’re good at, and what others need. by focusing on these ideas, i will be able to be more confident in my career path. additionally, a career journey involves lots of changes over time. “contentment is an obstacle. joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). therefore, it is important to continue to look for new opportunities throughout my life so that i can find joy and have a life well lived. the idea of continuously developing my skills and knowledge after college through a career journey is also supported by the center for career development here at notre dame. “career development is a process and a journey. if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). by referring to fr. himes’s three key questions and my personal mission statement, i will be able to navigate my post-college career journey and achieve a fulfilling professional life. my friends and family are another source that can help me determine which careers will allow me to best utilize my abilities. since these people are able to observe my interests from an outside perspective, they can provide insight on things that seem to attract my attention and inspire me to work hard. when i spoke with my dad for the moreau fye week five assignment, he told me that i looked most engaged when i was learning something new or trying new things. when i thought about this, i realized that i enjoyed the process of learning and experiencing new things. these insights will influence my career path, and help me find joy in my professional life. one very important aspect of a life well lived is having a mindset that allows one to appreciate the things they have, and to find fulfillment in the things that they do. “i encourage all of us to just focus what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by dr. jihoon kim moreau fye week six). in the “5 minutes” video, it is revealed that dr. kim was left almost completely paralyzed after a snowboarding accident, yet managed to find peace and fulfillment in his life after a period of hopelessness. this inspired me to take the time to appreciate all the things that i am able to do, and helped me realize that nothing can be taken for granted. in order to live a satisfying life, i must remember to be grateful for the little things that i usually may not pay attention to. another central part of a well lived life is having meaningful relationships and interactions with others. as said by pope francis, “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/468294?module_item_id=143819 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 nuss 3 to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). in order to have a meaningful life, one must be of service to those who are in need. each person is able to help make a difference in the world by assisting those who are struggling. showing tenderness towards others is an important step in improving the state of the world. i plan to uphold this philosophy by volunteering in my community. while helping those in need, it is important to remember that everybody can help each other. “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg). everybody has their own personal struggles, so it is essential to keep in mind that help can go both ways. one’s life is improved when they form friendships that are mutually beneficial for everyone. i can practice accompaniment in my life by being open to both giving and receiving help. it is important to treat everyone with dignity and respect, and this belief is present in the ideals of notre dame. “the university of notre dame strives for a spirit of inclusion among the members of this community for distinct reasons articulated in our christian tradition. we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac: a guide to student life). i think that this mission statement of inclusion is beneficial to the school as a whole, since it is moral to love your neighbor and to foster a diverse environment. i believe that everyone can help make the world a better place by showing kindness to others. i think that an essential aspect of a life well lived is acquiring wisdom about the world in which we live. however, a modern obstacle to becoming wise is the presence of echo chambers, which are more prevalent than ever before because of social media. due to the way in which social apps connect like-minded users, people are likely to join bubbles, which are groups of people with similar beliefs and interests. unfortunately, the ability to completely silence those who do not agree with the belief of a bubble can create echo chambers, which are more dangerous. “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko). members of echo chambers are unable to hear different views and opinions on a certain topic, which prevents them from truly understanding that topic. i believe i can pursue a life well lived by gaining wisdom, which can be done by avoiding echo chambers online and by learning about a diversity of world views. finally, i believe that a life well lived is achieved by actively working to make a positive change in the world. this requires bravery, especially if i have to be the first to speak out against something i think is morally wrong. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole). as i mentioned before, every person has the ability to be kind to others and promote unity among humankind. in my mission statement, i stated that i will stand up for what i think is morally right. i want to back up this statement by living my life in a way that makes the world a better place for everyone. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ capstone integration a mission from moreau formulating a mission statement is one of the best ways to evaluate where we are at and where we are headed. the moreau course has introduced many important ideas that first year college students must grapple with as they leave the familiarness of home. the mission statement i formulated this semester takes into account these issues, and i believe it accurately and completely describes how i want to orient my life going forward. my mission in life is to become exactly who god has made me to be. i want to live every moment in gratitude for the beautiful life he gave to me so that he can use me to show others his love. i believe that he has made me to love him, and that he loves every person on earth more than we could ever imagine. because of this, i know that he wants what is best for me, even when it hurts and when it does not bring me worldly success. i hope that complaints, despair, discouragement, pride, and selfishness slowly fade from my character, and they are replaced with humility, joy, gratefulness, and trust in god’s will. by the end of my life, i want the world to be a better place than it was before, so i can leave this life with no regrets. i hope that all the people i knew and loved will be better off for having me in their lives, but that i would not know it. i want the highest good in my life to be the knowledge that god loves me and that i am doing his will, so that nothing else matters. even if i somehow disappoint my family and friends and i seem to have failed miserably in my work, but i know that i followed him, then i will be satisfied. i think it’s so true that “all the unhappiness of men…arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com) by pico iyer -moreau fye week 1). i’ve realized that i need to work for an ideal that will satisfy my desires and not anyone else’s expectations. the outside world can be a distraction from my goals, so it is necessary to constantly reflect on who i am and how i am living my life. otherwise, i might get swept away in work that isn’t fulfilling. it is also important to realize that “the only time your vocation is settled is when you are settled (six feet under that is!).” ("three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes): sp22-fys-10102-20 moreau first year experience (nd.edu) -moreau fye week 3). the journey inward is even more crucial than the journey outward, and i must remain open to pursuing this aspect of my mission for my entire life. on the other hand, my interior attentiveness must not turn into selfishness or an obsession with my own success (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame – moreau fye week 4). an important part of my mission is cultivating what i’ve been given in order to impart it to others, which is a huge emphasis at notre dame as well (mission | university of notre dame (nd.edu) moreau week 13). one place i found inspiration was a comment about a domer dozen honoree, katarina goitz, which said that “her grace was like a burning flame. she passed it along to everyone she met, and her kindness and gentleness inspired those she touched to spread it further.” (2021 domer dozen (nd.edu), katarina goitz ’16 ’18 – moreau fye week 2). i hope that i’ll be able to “focus on what [i] can do for others or what [i] can do already instead of what [i] cannot do” (why does god allow suffering? grotto network -moreau fye week 6), and to value others’ perspectives and advice, especially those who have been put in my life to help my towards my mission (moreau fye_week five_discernment conversation activity_sp22 google docs – moreau fye week 5). the ultimate purpose of all these goals is to make this world a better place. by reflecting within and serving without, i hope to no longer be “saddled by the burden of…persistent judgements…ceaseless withholding…constant exclusion”, but instead find myself “in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love…into god’s own “jurisdiction.”” (tattoos on the heart chapter 8_ jurisdiction (1).pdf by fr. greg boyle, sj -moreau fye week 7). i totally agree that “it’s our duty to be informed” (passion isn't enough | hidden brain media – moreau fye week 11), because self-knowledge and understanding the needs of those around us lays the foundation for movement forward. dean g. marcus cole includes a quote by martin luther king in his statement on injustice: “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other.” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' | news | the law school | university of notre dame moreau week 12). i hope my mission will propel me to connect with others and appreciate their own stories as much as my own path. the final aspect of my mission involves god, who i believe has put these desires in my heart because i’m supposed to pursue them with all that i am. just as jacob walsh expressed “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.” (reflective narrative about being gay and catholic grotto network by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10), i’m not sure how i’ll be able to achieve what he wants me too, but i know that if i ask him for the grace then he will give me what i need. to conclude, i hope that this mission will make me a better person, change the world, and help me to find all that i am looking for. sometimes it can seem that “as children we had great and amazing dreams, but slowly they are stifled as we get older. the dreams begin to seem improbable. worse, it feels arrogant to think that we can or should have big dreams. our dreams have been dulled and deferred. at the same time, we are afraid to give them up entirely for what are we without our dreams? those dreams are still there waiting…” (teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, january 25, 2021.docx google docs moreau fye week 9). i hope that my mission will keep inspiring me to keep these dreams alive, so by the end i can be happy knowing that mine was truly a life well-lived. spring semester: capstone wavering beliefs when asked about god and my belief in him i reply in a simple manner: i believe in him. although that statement is composed of four simple words, it holds such a deep history. a history of how i struggled with faith in god and why it pushed me further to end up at the final statement i reply with. growing up in a pentecostal church alongside a family that entrenched themselves somewhat heavily in god, i was grounded in religion. we went to church every sunday, and even went on saturdays. we even celebrated all the religious holidays, and participated in church jobs such as singing in the choir or treasurer. being from new york, when covid 19 hit, it hit bad. it was the only thing that could make a once “alive” city that “never sleeps” go silent for over a year. around that time, senior year was emerging and that meant college preparationand specifically sat testing. i studied for months on end, and when i walked into that room and walked out for my first test, i felt okay. walking out, i was praying that my earlier prayers concerning the test would manifest in my score regardless of the mixed feelings i felt walking out. it did not. it was not bad, but it wasn’t good enough to achieve the goals i wanted to achieve. it wasn’t enough to get me where i wanted to be. so, my family and i had decided that i should take it again, but the covid situation had prohibited me from doing so in a timely manner and as i took the next one, i prayed, took the test, and left. this time i was more confident about the score i would receive. i began to cry upon receiving my second core back. somehow it was lower than that of my first, less-confident-inducing one. i was devastated and questioned where i should go from here. i highly questioned why god didn’t hear my prayers and whether he was even listening. i was questioning my loyalty to him and his to me. in the midst of all those emotions, i felt lost and guilty for questioning him-but i couldn’t stop. however, the day that applications came out, i was so pleased. i was grateful to myself, my family, and god for keeping me persevering through this process. at that moment, i finally understood that religion is not necessarily about traditions and being religious, but more so about spirituality and faith. it is about the feeling of assurance even in the face of devastation, you can hold a glimmer of hope that someone has you. i highly doubt that i would have been as motivated to preserve if i did not have a higher power to rely on as comfort in my downfalls. so, when people ask me what i believe about god, it is simple: i believe in him. i believe in the hope he can give me, the success he can bring me, and the comfort he inspires in me. i believe in him. … going through my year, i would often look at myself from an outside point of view. as though i was a narrator to my own life, and its relation to god. “lisa was many things so putting her in a box is impossible. the kind of spirit she held, in a small body, was too much to even describe. she had many stories to tell for her life was a sort of book that compiled anecdotes of both her life and others. i know this is supposed to be a eulogy, in other words i should speak of her whole life, but i think a picture can say a thousand words; and as her dear friend of four years, i wish to share a perspective from her freshman spring yearwhich still stands as one of the years she spent at crossroads in life. a year that technically affected her whole life and perception of it. (integrationmoreau fye week eight) … the spring semester was completely the opposite of her previous fall semester. to start off, she had switched her major. not even to a major within the same college that she came in, but to a whole different major in a whole nother college, and that was at first, a scare. why some may ask. well, due to many things. to start off with, she was overly stressed during her fall semester, as a freshman, which i told her off the bat that it was a no-no. at that point in time, she didn't realize that the stress was supposed to be delayed for sophomore and junior yearshe didn't get that luxury, because along with juggling a new point in my life, she had to juggle new subjects as well. bio, calc, and chem all in one. as a mendoza kid, i couldn’t relate. but as someone who hates mathnot because i’m mad at itbut more so because it's awful, i understood why lisa dreaded calc. but the ignorance of the first summer before college got to her. she did a few calc ``practices” over the summer and thought she was okay! spoiler alert, she was not. never took calc in high school, nor anything relating to calc but was thrown into a classroom filled with people who were either really big experts or in the same boat as her -expect they at least took pre-calc and therefore had a bigger paddle to go further than she did. office hours were fine, but when she also had to study for chem, and bio, classes that also incorporated some math elements at points, she was stuck. i remember most days she would look dry, tired, and sad. that was not how i wanted to see her be. she was certain that she wanted to be a doctor but was she willing to put her happiness on the line, especially for a path that did not highlight her true abilities and talents? lisa had begun asking these questions as winter break drew nearer; she was at a crossroad. … her faith was put to the test. during these moments lisa was left to really confront her belief in god and the trials and tribulations that came alongside it. oftentimes she would think why me?? god are you there? even listening? it gave flashbacks to her highschool days in which sheheld the same questions for god and could not seem to find a road but rather only dead ends. it was frustrating. she came in thinking she wanted to be a doctor, and by the grace of god she would push through and become one, but by the end of the first semester, she found herself switching to a different path. it was disheartening and to see god disheartened her again made her contemplate her belief in him. but just like the other scenario in highschool, everything happens for a reason and soon lisa’s purpose revealed itself sweetly. … “it's the rest in a piece of music that gives it renaissance and shape”. (“why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com)” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). we usually are caught up in the music to get a real feel of its message, beats, or even technicality. it is not until the ‘rest’ parts in a musical piece or the instrumentals in a song come that we can fully appreciate, comprehend, and connect with the music we have heard. in connection to one’s life, it is only by stepping further back and standing still that we can begin to see what our life really means, and what it holds. or in some cases, it doesn't. stopping, and standing still to observe the world around us can either enlighten us to stay or break away from what we know. but regardless of what it does, looking is beneficial. at that moment a part of her, the part that was still unwilling to let go of what she knew, told herself what she was doing, that her leaving was crazy. your sister is doing it, she's pushing through. your brother is going to do it too, in fact, he’s taking classes right now in high school to prepare, your parents will be disappointed. your friends will be disappointed, you’re a quitter. thoughts such as these swam endlessly like fishes through her heador at least these were the thoughts she was willing to communicate with me. she wanted to leave but couldn't at the same time. she was the first in my family to walk along a path that did not involve medicine, and i https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ could only imagine how scary that was to stray from a familiar path into an unknown one. but lisa was a courageous soul. like father hesburgh who “ did a lot of things that people would have thought as not particularly priestly”. (“hesburgh film (panopto.com)'' produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week two). she realized that at times one needs to push the barrier of whatever you're in, to make a change. in his time, what father hesburgh was doing was considered crazy and extremely out of the ordinary; but knowing what he wanted for the future of notre dame, father hesburgh was willing to be labeled behind these names as long as his actions could speak louder and more than those of everybody else’s words. this is something she strove to be on her new path as a poli sci and english major. she hoped that in this spring semester she could shut down and prove those opposing thoughts wrong. “this semester was going to be great, wayyyyy better than the last one!” she shockingly declared to her friends. remembering death [repeatedly] was a hard concept to get behind especially because it seems simply pessimistic in ideology. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die the new york times (nytimes.com)” by ruth graham, ny timesmoreau fye week three) but doing the activity of remembering death for a week, especially during the major switch, incited several other questions that lisa always heard yet never confronted. from what brings her joy to what she wanted to do, these questions continued to jump around in her mind once again. one thing thought that lisa discovered about herself through the week 3 reading was her tendency to overlap the meaning of happiness with joy. weirdly this made her come to a comforting conclusion that the path she would possibly switch to also would contribute to society as much as her previous intended path would. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html she liked writing and she was pretty good at it, but i also knew that she wanted a job that could lead her to the life of luxury she desired. when seeking another major for the spring semester outside of biology, she put an unnatural emphasis on her life and what the major could do for her. i witnessed her unknowingly falling back into that damaging mentality that she came into the fall semester with. she eventually decided to step out of that box and explore instead, with classes that she would enjoy such as creative writing and english. “so far, so good” she would say. “minus the workload”. listening to our lesson for (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame)” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four), the speaker’s advice to“ relax and put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major. it’s much more complex than that...but also much more exciting” and to “study what you enjoy and get involved” really stuck to her. overall, the spring semester of freshman year brought about greater insight ( an intuitive understanding of ourselves ) for lisa to enjoy stronger relationships, and have a clearer sense of purpose. she was much happier during the spring semester in spite of the workload and copious readings because she learnt to accept these things as a path she was meant to walk on. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) | (ted.com)” by tasha eurich, ted conferencesmoreau fye week six). in a way, she grew mentally, spiritually, and significantly in her comfortability of who she was. this spring semester also brought about acknowledgments. one hard thing lisa had to hear was to branch out because although she talked to a lot of people, she didn’t surround herself https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ with enough diversity (“discernment conversation activity''moreau fye week five); “...because life flows through our relations with others…” she made the spring semester a semester to branch out even more, with clubs and events. (“his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferencesmoreau fye week seven). “i want to interact and get involved with diverse groups of people” she would often tell me before dashing off to another event. heck! she even made me want to join her. speaking of a diverse group of people, you would not understand just how driven lisa got when it came to balck topics. she’s a firecracker and only another firecracker can somewhat lower down her sound. she grew up actively watching new york 1 and other news channels like cnn. but it wasn’t until recent years with hilary, and trump making most of the news that she had seen everyone invested in the news like never before. it was like an unscripted telenovela. yet, this “excitement” was what drew her away from the news. as time went on, she became repulsed. it seemed that everywhere she turned it was a new news channel trying to sell her their information rather than the raw information present. she realized this after watching fox news, and seeing strikingly similar undertones between that and my once trusty cnn. all these news channels wanted you to believe what they sold, not what was there or the truth. there was no such thing as leaving it up for one’s own personal interpretationand although this had been the reality for many years, the hilary vs. the trump era began the spiral into absolute yellow journalism. it got to a point that people’s lives were being dictated by political views and lisa did not want to end up like those people. she did not want to be in an echo chamber in absence of other perspectives so she stopped watching cable news and made sure that if there was https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript something she desired to discuss, she would try to do research from all different angles to reach a semi-plausible conclusion. (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber youtube'' by dr.paul blaschkomoreau fye week eleven). she desired to hear different perspectives. she did not want to remain ignorant to other people’s conditions of whether inside or outside the country (“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, january 25, 2021.docx google docs'' by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine). one thing lisa strives to do is to open up a comfortable conversation between white people and black people to discover why they are uncomfortable discussing race. lisa wishes for people-especially white people to understand that “while individual whites may be against racism, they still benefit from the distribution of resources controlled by their group. yes, an individual person of color can sit at the tables of power, but the overwhelming majority of decision-makers will be white. yes, white people can have problems and face barriers, but systematic racism won’t be one of them. this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the u.s. today if one ignores group power relations.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism robin diangelo google docs” by dr. robin diangelomoreau fye week ten). she wants the black community and everyone to talk-and not just talk but to listen as well. it is only then that we as a group-integrated with one another-van move onto bigger topics revolving around police brutality and the humiliating and emasculating of black men it brings. (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' | news | the law school | university of notre dame” by dean g. marcus colemoreau fye week twelve; and only with the strength and belief in god giving her the strength and willpower to do this, does she think it can be completed. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ … so, lisa’s spring semester although still posed as a new age in which she had to maneuver through and find her groove, and question godmade her spectacular, and also helped grow the connection with god too . lisa is a girl of great potential and i cannot wait to see the amazing impact she will make on the notre dame community with the next 3 years she has hereespecially with god on her side, because she believes in him-and he in her. microsoft word integration 3.docx driscoll 1 integration three moreau fys 4 march 2022 wishing to be defined by my values when i die, i want to be remembered as someone who put my loved ones before myself, and who always showed my appreciation for the people that mean the most to me. i highly value quality time with those that i love, and i feel that i am at my happiest when i am surrounded by friends and family, even if we are not doing anything in particular; just enjoying each other’s presence is satisfying enough for me. i am glad that my friends currently see the joy i get from being around other people, and i hope to continue to exemplify my values in my daily actions ("week five discernment activity"—moreau fye week five). being authentic and intentional in my actions in important to me and i want others to remember that i stick to my values when making decisions. i want to be remembered as a joyful person when i die. i want others to remember somebody with positive energy that always brightened their day. joy greatly improves one’s life; it is “central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes—moreau fye week three). this is why i not only want to live a joyful life, but i also aim to flood other people’s lives with joy so they can have as many good experiences as possible. for me, joy comes from my love towards others and their reciprocated love towards me, which is why i fill my life through socializing with people i love. i want to find other people’s source of joy and use this knowledge to make the lives of those i love as enjoyable as possible. driscoll 2 a life well-lived for me is one that is filled with faith and diverse experiences. of course, diverse experiences will include many struggles that must be overcome. however, these obstacles will not hinder joy in my life if i maintain my faith through them. i would like to ensure that no matter what triumphs or hardships i face, my faith stays strong throughout them all. father hesburgh is a great example of this; he did not always have an easy life by any means, but he always kept his relationship with god. even through something as horrific as the death of someone he was close to, he was able to survive because “it was because of his faith that he was a man of hope” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley—moreau fye week two). after his death, father hesburgh was acclaimed by many for having the ability to be faithful all his life. i wish to follow a similar path, which will not only bring hope and strength to my life, but also joy and growth. sometimes, rather than constantly appreciating all the blessings i have in my life, i “focus on the things we do not have,” like many other people do ("5 minutes" by aria swarr—moreau fye week six). although i am getting better at recognizing the good and not only the bad, i want to utilize my faithfulness to keep improving at being more optimistic. it can be easy for me to become overwhelmed by a busy schedule with many decisions to make. society puts pressure on individuals that they should always be pursuing something, and they should know what their passions are and what they want to do next. one thing that particularly stresses me out is discerning a career path. even though i have a declared major and minor, i have no idea what i want to do for a career, which can be overwhelming because “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” ("navigation your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development— moreau fye week four). however, as a part of a life well-lived, i believe that it is significant to focus on the bigger picture. i strive to remain hopeful and trust that everything will work out in driscoll 3 the end; this will allow me to direct my energy towards having memorable experiences rather than concerning myself with trivial stressors that will only distract me. furthermore, i feel that technology contributes to my stress and blocks me from doing other tasks because i get so wrapped up in looking at my phone or computer that i am not able to progress in my work. i want to live more in the present, rather than staring at a screen scrolling through social media sites. this quote from a week one article rings true in myself and many of my peers: “it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes—which means we’re never caught up with our lives” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer—moreau fye week one). we were raised knowing how to use technology, which means that it has always been an integral part of our lives. i want to undo this addiction. in the future, i hope to put my phone away more often and spend time with others without checking my phone after it has buzzed or worry about taking an excessive number of photos when i am doing something exciting. if i adopt these new habits, i will be able to live much more in the moment, which will allow me to work towards a life well-lived. i want my life to be defined by people and places rather than wasting hours away looking at a small screen. another attribute that i believe is part of the definition of a life well-lived is equality. equality and fair judgment are some of my foremost values that i consider when examining every single motivation and action in my life. sometimes i catch myself treating or thinking of someone in an unfair way for no reason. society teaches people to judge others at first glance or by certain attributes they have, and it is very hard to “dismantle what i have to set up to keep them out,” but it is necessary to create a better and more just society ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle—moreau fye week seven). similar to technology, this is a result of society that is produced in many people, and therefore it takes significant work and intention to be able driscoll 4 to reverse it, but it is certainly possible. in recent years, i have found myself questioning what my motivations are behind every decision i make, which has allowed me to exhibit equality in my daily life. i will continue to live out this habit of treating everyone fairly and not judging them immediately or based on a certain characteristic, and i hope i can encourage others to do the same. in short, i personally believe that a life well-lived is full of people who bring joy, love, faith, living in the moment, and diversifying experiences as much as humanly possible. i want to use my relationships and faith to bring joy to the lives of myself and others and do as much as i can in the limited years i have before i die. with every action, i will think about the ways in which i hope to be remembered to ensure that i am demonstrating my values in the choices i make. capstone integration capstone integration one year at notre dame: a reflection on what comes next a mission statement is an articulation of one’s goals and values. for the university of notre dame, that mission is drawing inspiration from the catholic faith, pursuing truth, advancing knowledge, and creating a welcoming community for all (university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week thirteen). for me, my mission in life is to have a successful career, cultivate meaningful relationships with others, be a good person, and make the most of every moment. the first prong of my mission statement is to have a successful career. in this context, successful means both challenging and rewarding. as an engineer, i look forward to a career that forces me to think critically and gives me the opportunity to develop solutions to society’s problems. by the end of my career, i would like to be able to look back on the projects that i’ve worked on and the impact they’ve had and feel a sense of pride and accomplishment. over the next three years, this aspect of my mission will animate my life as i remain focused on academics and take advantage of the resources offered by the career center. i plan on majoring in electrical engineering and minoring in engineering corporate practice, and through these studies, i hope to put myself in a position to work at the intersection of engineering and business. although i have a sense of direction when it comes to my career, i’m not completely sure of what i want to do, which is where the career center comes in. as i continue my discernment journey, i’ll continue to ask myself three questions: what brings me joy? what am i good at? what does the world need me to be? ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). in order to carry out my mission to have a successful career, i need to ensure that i not only enjoy my work, but also that my skills can be put to use and that my job is beneficial to society. another important step to leading a successful career is making use of input from others. having conversations with alumni and utilizing irishcompass will serve as a useful tool to learn about the careers of those who were in my shoes not so long ago. additionally, asking those who know me what they could see me doing in the future is an informative experience, which was the case with the week five discernment activity. i spoke to my parents, and they observed that i favor my math and science classes over any other subject, and they reaffirmed my choice to study engineering. when it comes to making sure that my career benefits others, i can look to the example set by fr. hesburgh. his work went far beyond himself and the university of notre dame and impacted the entire world in the realms of civil rights and catholic education, and as an incredible leader with the ability to connect people, no matter how different they might be (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). over the next three years, i plan to work towards my mission of having a successful career by applying myself in my classes, utilizing the resources offered by the career center, having conversations with alumni and other people in my life that can help me in my discernment process, and following the examples set by people like fr. hesburgh. https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 the second tenet of my mission statement is to build meaningful relationships with others. part of my definition of a life well-lived means that there are people in my life who support me and that i can support in return. this idea of mutual support arises in the concept of accompaniment. in a partnership, people bring different skill sets and attributes to the table, but that isn’t a bad thing. whether i’m the one being accompanied or accompanying someone else, i need to be willing to share my strengths so that development can take place (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). throughout my life, i want to continue to create bonds with those around me. up to this point in time, that has primarily been my family and friends that i’ve known for years. during college so far, i’ve tried to interact with those in my dorm by joining interhall sports teams and attending masses in our chapel. i’ve also started interacting with my professors by attending office hours and asking questions. additionally, i’ve been making an effort to meet people through my classes and different clubs and organizations. in the future, i’ll also have to build relationships with my coworkers. this relationship-building portion of my mission statement will animate my life throughout the next three years specifically by encouraging me to continue to broaden my horizons and expand my network. this means that i have to be willing to be vulnerable and step outside of my comfort zone in order to meet new people. an important part of forming relationships is being able to refrain from judgment. fr. greg boyle echoes this sentiment in an excerpt from tattoos on the heart when he says that if we close our eyes to judgment, “our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves…in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (chapter 8: jurisdiction by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). for the next three years, i plan to build meaningful relationships by making an effort to have conversations with those around me, whether it be in my dorm, in my classes, or in another setting, and always striving to be open-minded and refrain from judgment. the third part of my mission statement is to be a good person. by this i mean that i want my actions to be guided by faith, i want to continue to grow in wisdom, and i want to always do the right thing. part of the catholic faith is viewing everyone as a creature of god and respecting and welcoming all without regard to any differences (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame moreau fye week ten). with this in mind, being a good person means fostering an environment where everyone is included. no matter how different someone might be from me, my faith reminds me that they too are created by god and are worthy of all my kindness and respect. when it comes to forming opinions and growing in wisdom, it is important to consider where our information is coming from. dr. paul blaschko describes that bubbles of like-minded individuals can quickly turn into echo chambers that actively discredit other viewpoints and make no effort to tolerate the opposing side at all (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). the takeaway here is that we need to be intentional about how we form our opinions. only surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us does no good in becoming wiser. alternatively, we should seek out the other side and truly gain an understanding of their perspective. the mission of the congregation of holy cross also provides some notable information, such as, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people” and “disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week twelve). these excerpts serve as reminders that we should strive to support everyone and we must be able to see when something isn’t right and be able to act to address it. these resources provide a solid outline on https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144176 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144194 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144194 how i can go about being a good person, and these are steps that i intend on taking throughout the next three years (and throughout my life as a whole). i plan to always seek to include everyone regardless of any differences, expose myself to a variety of viewpoints so that i can gain an understanding of the perspective of others and not just my own, and actively try to identify injustices and have the courage to do something about it. the final part of my mission statement is to make the most of every moment. with such a busy schedule, it can be easy to keep thinking about what’s coming up instead of the current moment. this is what usually happens to me over the weekend; although i might not have any assignments due, i start looking to the next week and working on those assignments that are coming up. while planning ahead is certainly not a bad thing, sometimes it’s better to slow down. pico iyer really captures the importance of slowing down when he writes, “it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) in music, rests are just as important, if not more so, than the notes that are actually played, and this is true in life as well. rest and time for reflection are vital to living a successful life. sister theresa aletheia noble practices “memento mori”, which means “to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week three). her view is that we will eventually run out of moments, so it’s essential to make the most of each one of them. something that i can do over the next three years to rest and appreciate the current moment is incorporate mindfulness into my daily routine. some possible activities include meditating, breathing exercises, or praying the rosary (“ways to practice mindfulness” by the mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six). practicing mindfulness is a great way to set aside time for reflection and being in the present, and it’s definitely something that i can see myself doing throughout the rest of my time in college. in conclusion, my mission statement has four parts to it, each of which will animate my life for the next three years. firstly, i want to have a successful career that allows me to be challenged and solve the problems facing society, and i will work towards this by focusing on my studies and taking advantage of the resources offered by the career center. second, i want to cultivate lasting and meaningful relationships, and to do this i’ll make an effort to step outside of my comfort zone and interact with those around me, without judgment. third, i want to simply be a good person, which i can accomplish by fostering a spirit of inclusion, educating myself on a variety of perspectives, and having the courage to act and stand up for what’s right. lastly, i want to be able to make the most of every moment, which i can do by practicing mindfulness and remembering to live in the present. overall, my first year at notre dame has allowed me to learn a lot about myself, and i look forward to applying what i’ve learned and working towards my mission over the next three years and beyond. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view?usp=sharing grace mckenna professor taylor moreau experience 18 april, 2022 a mission turned to a journey my mission starts with others. it is the reason why i am here and part of the reason why i am who i am. family is extremely important to me and i will always never leave their side. i will continue to build deep personal relationships with all i meet. i see each day as a clean slate, to not only start fresh, but to improve from the past. to know the present is a true gift and both the good and bad build memories and shape or even reshape character. i am a responsible student, teammate, and cadet who strives to challenge myself and those around me to be better. i have the guts to fail, the love of risk, and understand that when i do fall, to not fall back, but to fall forward. i will be a leader who learns from their mistakes and is decisive in decisions so i can serve a bigger mission. a mission to serve a nation of people. i know this purpose is bigger than myself, but due to my faith, support system, strong work ethic and discipline, i believe i can live the life i was intended to lead. one where i hope to conquer my fears, to build relationships to last a lifetime, to be decisive and intelligent, but most importantly to grow in selflessness and humility. many values make up a life well lived. whether it be faith, family, love, and trust, or hope, humbleness, time, and community, it is often difficult to balance every trait, but even more difficult to stop and think about the situation before acting on it. for one could stay motivated and work hard, two important values in living a good life, but if they do it in an arrogant way neglecting humbleness and the support they received, is it really a worthy victory? as a result, life becomes much more complicated than what lies on the surface. however, having role models is a good first step. modeling after father hesburgh, a man where “everywhere you looked, he was always there and doing,” one can follow an example of someone who accomplished so much by simply remembering the core values of a successful life ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley-moreau fye week 2). he was a great leader who helped bring the university of notre dame alive, advocated for the civil rights movement, met with many other leaders to learn, advise, and bring the world together, all while staying down to earth and true to his first concern: the students at notre dame. though he was extremely busy, he always had time for his students and focused on building strong relationships with those who were open to it. however, many in this world fail to recognize the importance of relationships and instead, as pope francis stated, “people’s paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered with money and things, instead of people” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis-moreau fye week 7). with every new generation, society becomes more technologically advanced, prices go up, competition continues. people lose sight of the true meaning of life and instead place their priorities in material goods that can never provide happiness. ironically, it is “the very people…who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). in silicon valley, the location of the biggest technological companies where that same competition and materialism has sparked, employees have done the opposite that society teaches. they take breaks to meditate, have quiet hours to reflect, and some do not even own the iphones or the other devices they create. they understand the importance of taking time for oneself as well as others, specifically in the way they place reflection as a key to personal growth. this self-reflection allows for one to have a greater self awareness of their actions, helping them to pause and understand what really matters in their life. however, according to psychologist anthony grant, “introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a whole host of unintended consequences” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha eurich-moreau fye week 6). though self-reflection is necessary to develop self awareness, sometimes looking internal can cause mental instability or a fixated mind. it becomes a mental game where reflection turns into doubts and a “why me” mindset. this is why people need strong relationships to provide different perspectives to eliminate tunnel vision and focusing only on one side. maybe it is a deep conversation with a loved one to get back on the right path or a simple wake up call screaming, “god doesn’t make sh!t” ("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto-moreau fye week 10). with every unique person that is special and perfect in god’s eyes, one can realize their importance in humanity and respect all who cross their path. though some people will teach you how not to be, while others will stay in your life forever, all people should be valued, accepted, and loved. however, just like society is consumed in wealth, status, technology, it too has built habits that have neglected specific groups of people. it teaches to “surround ourselves with people who agree with us,” and as a result, “we lose our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko -moreau fye week 11). instead of learning from the opposing view, we outcast them immediately. losing the self-reflection, the tunnel vision resumes and relationships become strained and even some segregated. yet, a respected lawyer at the university of notre dame g. marcus cole provides a quote from martin luther king jr. that turns the complex system of racism into a simple one. he quotes king saying, “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school-moreau fye week 12). humanity fails to simply have the conversation, to bring people together. this is a huge issue in the world today and even harder to reverse. however, like everything in life “it’s not a one-step process,” but rather “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at that time or not” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development-moreau week 4). even though racism is such a deeply rooted issue, small steps to bring people together and have the hard conversations, can then lead to relationships that can reshape the world. for it is through relationships that creates the shout amongst the whispers, the unique amongst the crowd, the change amongst the ordinary. as professor steve reifenberg explains, “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). though solidarity is described as standing in union with another, it also serves a bigger purpose. one that society desperately needs. it is not just for the people who can speak for the voiceless, but for the voiceless to gain their voice. only then can a new voice be heard to break the stereotypes and for all to learn for the better. simply put life is a broad spectrum of so many different opinions, values, people, perspectives, issues, beauties, and more. however, by breaking each phase down, life can be simple. like sr. theresa aletheia, a sister from the daughters of st. paul preaches everyday in life that “you are going to die,” we all must try to live to the fullest each day ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). though some view this message as a morbid thought, life and death are connected. time runs out and people are left with wondering what they did or accomplished. if society welcomes death in a new way—wasting no time so one can live to the fullest—then all people can be more motivated to reach their goals, say yes to new opportunities, and engage with people or situations they never thought they could. whether it be remembering father hesburgh, taking time to self-reflect, building long lasting and trusting relationships, or breaking society’s stereotypes, humanity has the power to improve, change, and affect the world in a positive light. it is in this power where one must choose to take risks, say yes, reach out a helping hand, but most importantly, to keep a personal mission statement close to their heart, editing and deleting along the way, on the mysterious, difficult, and wonderful path we call life. week 8 integration three 3/1/22 predicting my future death, itself, is not something that anyone likes to think about. the idea of someone’s life ending, of their spark burning out, and of them entering that final sleep is often avoided. even when talking about the death of a loved one, people will often use phrases like “passed away” or “moved on to heaven” instead of saying the word “die.” in this way, it is our nature to stay away from any situation, which involves death. if death were only the ending of a life, then there would be no other option but to act in this way. however, death can also be a moment to remember and recall the life of one who passed away. by looking at death through the eyes of remembrance, one can focus on the journey of one’s life instead of how it ended. when thinking about my own eulogy, i am forced to think about what i want in my life and how it will work out. for example, who will be giving my eulogy? will it be my best friend, a family member, or someone else entirely? will they talk about my career and possible successes there? will they talk about my family life? will they talk about how i made them feel? these are all questions that i had to ask myself when thinking about this essay; however, i could never come up with sufficient answers. the only thing that i could think of was what i hoped the answers would be. i hope that throughout my life, i will seize opportunities as they arrive and that i will live in the moment. this is difficult to do as so many things are occurring every single day, which can cause a person to feel overwhelmed. this idea is shown in a quote from the first week’s materials, which says that “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). there is a consistent flow of information and other things that require a person’s attention. because of this, it is difficult to take a moment to really be introspective. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ this can lead to people feeling overwhelmed and stressed out. i know that this happens to me sometimes when i get too caught up in thinking about the future and all the things that i must do, specifically concerning my future career. one of the week four materials states that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). there is much to think about when it comes to choosing a career whether it be intended major, internship, or overall happiness and satisfaction. therefore, the preparatory elements are very important. however, they aren’t the whole story. similarly to how the experiences on a tour throughout europe may be more enjoyable than the viewing of famous destinations, the decisions that you make along with other career moments help to define your future and who you become. in this way, it is the moments themselves and the individual opportunities that are more important than the end result. because of this, i hope that during my eulogy, the speaker will talk about how i realized that the most important parts of life are the steps along the way and that i lived in the moment. i hope that during my eulogy, the speaker mentions that i was always willing to try new things. during my career discernment activity, when i asked my mother what difficult thing i needed to hear, she said that “i need to get out of my comfort zone and expand my horizons” (“week 5 reflection discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week five). this is something that is extremely applicable to me currently and is something that i hope to work on. although many things within my comfort zone are enjoyable and bring me happiness, i won’t know what lies outside of it unless i leave it from time to time. by trying new things, i am able to find new passions and dreams of mine that i couldn’t even imagine today. a quote that ties into this idea came from week 3 of moreau. father michael himes says that “questions, concerns, issues that you return to over and over again because they fascinate you, they excite you, they really intrigue you, they lure you on, they get you to ask more and more https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vxok5n7z4a5iqmc7gik2rzoj2lgrldbw8jxxmklga_a/edit questions. what are your obsessions? where do you ask more and more questions? this is a very good indication that this is where your joy lies! spend your life in this way” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). these questions, concerns, and issues that will lead me along the path of my life well-lived may not be known to me yet, and the only way that i’ll be able to find these passions of mine is by venturing outside of what is known to me. in this way, by leaving my comfort zone and trying new things, i may be able to determine what really matters to me and how i want to spend my life. however, things may not always work out, especially when trying new things. during the sixth week of moreau, dr. kim says “so i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). although a person may fail, particularly when trying new things, he or she should continue to move forward as this setback is merely a change in direction. in this way, problems don’t have to be the end; instead, they are a chance to try something else. for these reasons, i hope that in my future, i will be open to trying new things and branching out from my comfort zone. i hope that the person who reads my eulogy will mention the strong relationships that i formed. something that i realized the importance of recently are relationships, specifically those with friends and family. being away from family has been particularly difficult for me due to my family being quite close and due to the fact that i never lived alone before coming to college. to maintain my connections with my family, i call my parents multiple times a week, and during these calls, i’ll often catch them at dinner with my sister, aunt and uncle, or my grandparents, which gives me an opportunity to talk to them as well. for my friendships, i haven’t been doing as much to maintain them, which is something that i want to change. throughout the semester, i have regularly called my best friend; however, i haven’t reached out to the rest of my friends. i have texted a few of them at different points throughout the semester, but i haven’t talked to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 many of them since the end of the summer. because of this, i decided to reach out to more people recently. during the documentary about father hesburgh, one of the interviewees described father hesburgh by saying “that the latin word for priest. it was ‘pontifex,’ bridge builder. ted was a bridge builder between people and god and among people” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). like father hesburgh, i hope to build bridges between different people, forging relationships in the process. i also hope to continue to maintain these bridges into the future. as a part of my new relationships, i hope to join groups that are important to me. in the week seven moreau materials, pope francis says “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another "you," and another "you," and it turns into an "us”” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). in my future, i hope to join an organization or cause that i am passionate about and that can make a difference in the world. currently, i am a member of the student club, jiffi, which offers low-interest loans to people within the south bend community, acting as an alternative to predatory payday lenders. we also provide lessons on managing one’s finances in order to improve the financial stability of our clients. in these ways, i hope to build bridges between people, to forge new relationships while maintaining old ones, and to make a difference in the world. although death may be something that i don’t want to think about, considering my future eulogy is important as it allows me to think about the specific goals that i want to accomplish throughout my life’s journey. i want to seize new opportunities and try to live in the moment. i want to be open to new experiences, and through this, i hope to discover new passions of mine. i want to create new relationships while maintaining my old ones. i also would like to become a part of an organization that i am passionate about and that makes a difference. in these ways, by considering what i want in my eulogy, i have realized what i want in my future. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration moreau capstone integration 4/29/22 finding purpose and exploring life at notre dame throughout my time at notre dame so far, i’ve encountered many obstacles. adapting to a new environment, living independently, meeting countless new people, and balancing challenging academic work has been stressful. i’ve become more aware of the importance of not comparing myself to others. i look around at other people who seem to have their lives figured out completely while i have no idea what i want to do with my own life. but that’s ok. i need to remind myself that everyone has obstacles they face throughout their lives. i also need to remind myself how blessed i am – i mean look where i am right now. even when i feel the world has something against me, i need to realize there are those that have it much worse than i do. dr. jihoon kim survived a snowboarding accident that left him paralyzed. he said “i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (5 minutes by grotto/dr. jihoon kim moreau week six). i find myself focused on the bad grades, messy papers, and little annoyances, but yet i can move my fingers, i can walk, talk, and breathe with no problem. being at notre dame for a year has already led me to see that i am extremely blessed. i can use my blessings and my experiences at notre dame to bring about real change and improve the lives of those who are less fortunate. sometimes it’s difficult to stay on a course of positivity. i’ve gotten raging episodes of imposter syndrome, i’ve questioned my abilities and whether or not i deserve to be at notre dame countless times. i don’t consider myself to be a very spiritual person, but i certainly didn’t think god loved me at times. jacob walsh had a beautiful quote about god’s love and loving oneself, “‘you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.’ at the time, i’d thought this meant god loved me in spite of my being attracted to men. but i started to see he was using my sexuality to reach me with his love.” (growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh (grotto) moreau week ten) it’s really difficult to love yourself when you think you’re different or wrong in some way. you begin to question everything and fall into a cycle of self-hatred. it’s important to have someone remind you that god loves you and he wants you to love yourself and love those who surround you as well. the friends i’ve met have made me feel wanted and loved. they may not even realize the service they’ve done me, but i will forever be in their debt for pushing me on the path of self-love. the more support i’ve gotten, the stronger i’ve become. when i talked with my mom about my strengths and weaknesses, i was reminded just how special i am. i have plenty of areas to improve upon too, which will fuel my growth and development over my remaining years at notre dame (moreau week five). because of all the love and support i’ve received, i’ve had many opportunities to share my own love with others. i’ve been able to show just how amazing each person is and just as others did for me, i’m now able to push people to love themselves and accept their beauty and uniqueness. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 although i’m not really sure what i want to do with my life outside of college, i am constantly searching for inspiration for a life well lived. finding something i’m passionate about or something i feel strongly about is a way to formulate a plan for the future. for example, dr. rene bermea pursued a career in medicine because his younger sister, “was diagnosed with a rare and life-threatening brain tumor that required surgery and left her dependent on a slew of medications to support her endocrine system. this served as his motivation to pursue a career in medicine” (domer dozen by notre dame alumni association moreau week two). bermea’s selflessness and willingness to help others is something i found i want to share in common. while i still don’t know exactly what i want to do in the future or how i want to accomplish it, the courses i have taken this year, such biology and chemistry, i’ve found there is plenty of areas to help others whether it be research to regulate blood sugar levels and reduce cases of obesity and type ii diabetes, or finding ways to reduce carbon emissions, or even teaching/tutoring. without a doubt, classes i will take in the future could help refine my interest and area of expertise. also it’s comforting when friends, family, teachers, etc. reassure me that i’ll find a path in time. dr. super suggested, “career decision making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development moreau week four). who knows, i might not even find my calling throughout my life. i have to remind myself that the more things i experience, the more opportunities i’ll have to find a way to make an impact on a person, group, community, country, or even the world. while thinking about the future can have its benefits, it’s easy for me to get anxious and it’s led me to ask questions about what i really want in life. what’s important to me? how can i achieve success? what even is success? over the year, i've come to appreciate the importance of living in the moment. i believe a lot of people think success is fulfilling a plan or reaching a goal, and to some extent it is, but to me success is being pleased with yourself in the present. success is enjoying the moment, continuously learning and changing. success is taking pride in how far you’ve come, looking at all the obstacles you’ve overcome even if you haven’t reached a specific goal. a good (but also a little dark) way to remain appreciative of the present is to remind yourself that one of the only unavoidable facts of life is that we all die. theresa aletheia noble explains the importance of reminding oneself about death, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham/sister theresa aletheia noble (nyt) moreau week three). death is a scary topic in modern society. many people try to avoid this fact because it brings them momentary happiness. however, understanding that death awaits us all allows us to make the most of our time spent living. considering we don’t know what happens after death we have to appreciate what we know and what we have right in front of us. acknowledging and accepting this inevitable fact, has pushed me out of my comfort zone. i’ve had the chance to meet wonderful people, make lasting memories laughing late into the night or sprinting across ricci fields playing football with the dorm, going to all types of sporting events, and so much more. fully enjoying these moments is success. it’s contagious and i hope that i will be able to help others find their way to their own versions of success as i continue my journey at notre dame and onward. https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html another tactic i try to implement everyday is to take some time to go for a walk. it gives me time to reflect upon what i’ve learned and what i want to do as well as instill a sense of inner peace. these walks have led me to find a sense of belonging and gratefulness for the gifts that i have. i take less time to dwell on what problems plague me or the seeming “perfections” of others. i’ve found that practicing self-reflection allows the mind to relax. i become more efficient with my work (i even started this after a walk), my interactions with others are more meaningful, and my mood improves dramatically. mahatma gandhi understood the importance of practicing self-reflection, “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.” his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. “i’ll have to meditate for two” (why we need to slow our lives down by pico lyer moreau week one). it’s easy to get caught up in the troubles and tribulations of day to day life, but giving myself time to self-reflect has allowed me to thrive in this new chapter of my life. this year i’ve encountered countless brilliant people who have the ability to be the cause of helpful change in the world. i’ve seen so many clubs and classes full of passionate people who have meaningful contributions and spread information and awareness for countless topics from gender equality, sexual harrasment, climate change, an countless others. i am immersed in an environment that radiates hope which stems from unique origins. pope francis elaborates on the importance of hope when he said, “hope is a humble, hidden seed of life that, with time, will develop into a large tree. it is like some invisible yeast that allows the whole dough to grow, that brings flavor to all aspects of life. and it can do so much, because a tiny flicker of light that feeds on hope is enough to shatter the shield of darkness. a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another "you," and another ‘you,’ and it turns into an ‘us’” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis (ted) moreau week seven). i don’t know everything, nor do i claim to know everything, but i’ve found the importance of accumulating as much knowledge on as many topics as i can. by further understanding the problems that other people, groups, communities, etc. face, i can begin to understand why people think the way they think. while i have learned about problems that certain people and/or groups face, i might not necessarily represent them. fr. gustavo gutiérrez had a memorable quote with regards to responding to suffering, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless. this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey by steve reifenberg moreau week nine). i can use my knowledge to promote equality and diversity through the spreading of information and awareness to people like me, who might know nothing about a certain topic. additionally, i can help others acknowledge their implicit biases and help them break out of potential echo chambers. people come from all different backgrounds and some might not be exposed to varying viewpoints on certain topics. this can be dangerous if people continue to surround themselves with others who believe in the same things and don’t bring in new information that might challenge their views. as eitan hirsh puts it, “and if you're… only talking about politics to the people who are exactly like you, there's no point of thinking of a person on https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit the other political party as someone you need to convince of anything. you don't. you don't need to convince them of anything because you're not doing anything”(passion isn’t enough by shankar vedantam and eitan hersh (hidden brain) moreau week eleven). acknowledging biases and unchallenged beliefs is the start to creating a more inclusive environment. it’s easy to shut out or be afraid of the opposition, dean cole used a quote from dr. king jr. which explains why people hate each other, “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. by dean g. marcus cole moreau week twelve). if i can bridge the gap between different groups with varying viewpoints, i will be able to help create a safer, more accepting world. i believe it’s important for people to share their problems with others. by doing this, people can form strong relationships to tackle big problems by sharing ideas, experiences, and a common goal for good. this way, hope will shine like a beacon to those who may be shrouded in darkness. (mission statement reworked moreau week thirteen) https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ moreau first year experience integration #3 4 march 2022 my life well-lived thinking about a life well-lived can be daunting and intimidating, but it also puts my life into perspective by reminding me to focus on things that matter to me now and will matter to me in the future. one characteristic of a life well-lived for me is being able to inspire, mentor, and lead others. i have always said that i hope to one day not only serve others using my skills, but to empower others to do the same with their skills, so that the effect is exponential. this correlates to my career and work aspirations because as someone who wants to go into business, i want to make sure i am working for a company that gives back and focuses on social responsibility. in his ted conferences speech, pope francis emphasizes this value of impacting others by declaring, “the more powerful you are, the more your actions will have an impact on people, the more responsible you are to act humbly” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis – moreau week 7). moreover, i also want to make sure this is a value i instill in my personal relationships and life. i want to be remembered as someone who took time out of my day to help and inspire those around me. father hesburgh summarizes it well when he said that “as a priest, [he] wanted to help others find their own strength, even in the greatest of suffering” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau week 2). leaving an impact, no matter if it is on one person or a million, is something that is important to me because it means i lead my life with purpose and service. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 if i want to be someone who can mentor and lead others, another aspect that i believe will characterize a life well-lived for me is taking risks and seizing opportunities. similar to how the meruelo career center suggests that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters,” i think this is an important principle to apply to my own life, whether it is career related or not ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development – moreau week 4). personally, putting myself outside of my comfort zone can be difficult for me, but i also think it can be so rewarding; therefore, i believe living a life well-lived includes trying new things i am interested in, traveling to new places, and embracing new experiences. moreover, i have always been someone who wants to live in multiple different cities because i think culture and experience is different everywhere you go, and i want to experience as much of that as i can. additionally, i also want this mindset of going after opportunities and risks to apply to my work-life. i hope my work life is modeled after the “three key questions” article that exclaims “vocations lead to vocations,” and there is no point “where you can say that [you] do not have to ask any more questions” ("three key questions" by father michael himes – moreau week 3). i want to be live a curious life, which means i want to keep asking questions, keep learning, and keep adapting. i want to be remembered as someone who did not settle and went after opportunities. while my mind might change because i might find a company i love, as of right now, a life well-lived for me is getting experience in multiple industries or areas of expertise. hopefully, experiences during the summer or internships will also help expose me to different careers and interests. overall, a life well-lived for me means not going into ‘auto-pilot’ mode, but instead being continually present in the moment. a life well-lived requires me to ask myself if what i am doing day in, day out is making me happy and if it is challenging me to live up to my fullest potential. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 the relationships and people that i am surrounded by is the most important indicator of what it means for me when i think of a life well-lived. first, a characteristic of a fulfilling life for me would be creating and having a family that i am surrounded by at the end of my life. i am extremely close with my family, and they are the most important thing to me, so extending and growing my family is something that is essential to my life well-lived. beyond just a family though, i also think a life well-lived includes creating tender, giving, and respectful relationships with not only with people i feel close to but also to the people who i might disagree with or not get along with. while finding “mutuality” can be “hard won,” it is also something that is extremely important and worth it ("jurisdiction" from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle – moreau week 7). in my life, i want to do my best to bridge the gaps between hate and misunderstanding. i realize it takes time, effort, and patience to find common ground, but i think it is an important aspect to instill in my life and others’ lives. creating connections with people that i might not agree on everything with is important because it helps foster respect, compassion, and learning. i believe relationships are the true goal in life because human connection is not something that can be replaced. how you treat others is a reflection of character, and i want to be remembered as someone of good character, who tried her best to create fulfilling relationships. speaking of relationships, a life well-lived will encounter negative or bad relationships, but i think being able to grow and learn from those relationships can enhance my life. within my relationships, i want to be remembered as someone who was authentic, compassionate, positive, and determined. i want people to remember me as someone who was not afraid to stand up for myself and my beliefs but also respectful enough to listen and understand others’ beliefs. one video we watched this semester talked about how we should https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 “focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” ( "five minutes" by aria swarr on grotto – moreau week 6). sometimes, it is easy to get caught up in my own life, stress, and problems that i forget to focus on god, the things i should be grateful for, and how i can help others. i think to lead a life welllived, i want to carry myself in a compassionate, appreciative manner, instead of hyper focusing on things that are out of my control or unfair. finally, a life well lived for me is being able to persevere when i fall down and help others do the same. i want to be remembered as someone who never gave up on themselves or others and always kept reaching for their goals. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 aimara mayer moreau fye – mike comuniello capstone integration 4-29-2022 our god is love my mission is to love. when asked what the greatest commandment was, jesus answered that it was to love the lord your god with all your heart, and all your soul, and all your strength, and that the second was to love your neighbor as yourself. the commonality between thee two commandments is love. paul reinforces this in his epistles. he says, “if i have faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, i am nothing” (1 corinthians 13:2). it is clear then that my mission, and that of every christian, is first and foremost to love. for me, that love manifests in two ways. the first is in small, everyday acts of kindness. saying good morning to the janitors or the dining hall workers, helping my classmates with their work, simply offering a kind word here or there. the second is in being a force for change, however small that change may be. i believe i have been blessed with eyes to see and ears to hear what is wrong with humanity, to see and hear the cries of injustice and oppression. and though i cannot do everything, though i may not be able to affect meaningful change to systemic racism throughout the us, i can do something; i can work to address one issue in one place and push for meaningful, substantive change. i have a voice, and i will use it. in all, i will strive to be patient and kind, to listen without judgement with the assumption that what they are saying comes from someplace real and valid, even if i do not agree with their words. even when my heart may be angry, even when it may be hatful, i will choose to love. love is not a feeling but a choice, and i pray it is the choice i will always make. for that is what it means to be christian. to be christian is to choose god above all else, and our god is love. one of the questions father himes tells us to ask ourselves when considering our calling is “what bring you joy?” (“three key questions,” fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). in the past, i have said that what would bring me joy is a simple, quiet, peaceful life. but i no longer believe that is the case. i do not think it is possible for me to find joy in a quiet life when my transgender siblings are being attacked across the country. it may not even be possible for to find a quiet life when here at notre dame speakers are invited who speak against my identity as “truthless.” dean cole said of himself that “the callous murders of unarmed men like ahmaud arbery and george floyd are real for me” (“i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something,” dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week 12). similarly, the stories of transgender men and women, of transgender children, having their identities, their lives, turned into the next battleground of a culture war is very real to me. i will not and cannot stay quiet about it. to paraphrase my brother, i cannot have the luxury of ignoring politics. so, as i said in my mission statement, i will be a force for change. and that starts right here at notre dame. the university makes the claim that “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame,” university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10), but it is clear that some are much more welcome than others. the 2020 inclusive campus survey found that 40% of those who identify as transgender or non-binary do not feel belonging here at notre dame (“2020 inclusive campus survey report,” university of notre dame – moreau fye week 11). that is the highest number of any group. notre dame cannot claim to welcome all when nearly half of one of its most vulnerable communities feels they do not belong here. i intend to push notre dame to do more, to truly welcome non-binary and transgender students. i do not yet know exactly what form that will take, but i intend to reach out to the gender relations center as a start, and from there find who i can talk to and what changes i can push for to make notre dame a welcoming place in fact as well as in name. one of the things i must be careful of in walking this path is to walk it in love. it can be far too easy, especially with an issue this serious and this personal, to fall into demonizing the other side, to paint them as hateful bigots or ignorant fools. it can also be easy to give up, to decide that the other side will never listen, and that no real good will ever come of pushing for change. i have to be careful to do neither of these things. avoiding them will be hard, but it is doable. with regards to the first, i have no doubt that there will be times when my heart will burn with anger and even hatred, but thankfully “solidarity, however, is not an automatic mechanism. it cannot be programmed or controlled. it is a free response” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone,” pope francis – moreau fye week 7). i will not always be able to control how i feel, but i will be able to control how i act. and i pray that however angry i may grow, i will always choose and act with love. with regards to the second, there is precedent that even the most bitter of enemies with the most diametrically opposed viewpoints can come together and find common ground. just look at what father hesburgh was able to achieve. it’s said that “he loved to watch people who didn’t agree on anything get in a room and bridge all that” (“hesburgh,” jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2). i hope that in the years to come, i can be a little like father hesburgh in that regard. finally, just as i hope to love others, i must also remember to love myself. i am coming out of an extraordinarily stressful time in my life, and i will also soon be coming out as openly transgender. no doubt, that will bring on stress of its own. for all the lofty goals i am setting, i will need to remember to take time to slow down and rest. to take time to recharge, to recover, and to enjoy the good things i already have, which are plentiful. or, in the words of pico iyer, “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). there is much to be done in the world. but there is also much that is already good and should be enjoyed for what it is. i intend to remember that, and to enjoy the good that is already here. week 8 integration 3 a life of light: a eulogy for myself by: “do not go gentle into that good night, old age should burn and rave at close of day; rage, rage against the dying of the light.” (do not go gentle into that good night by dylan thomas poems | poets.org) the introduction of dylan thomas’ poem embodies claire’s spirit. claire’s life was not defined by her accomplishments and failures. no, her life was defined by how she lived her life. she sought happiness in everything she did. although her journey towards happiness was bumpy, she ultimately found her way there. a life well-lived is one where you find happiness in everything you do. that was claire’s life. claire’s life was not glamorous or impressive per se. but it was a life that would make claire proud if she looked back on it. her life was filled with struggles and successes, but it was defined by how she approached the challenges and triumphs. throughout her early years, claire struggled to “slow down [her life]” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). she felt as if her entire life had been defined by one deadline after another and one test after another. claire approached each day with a negative mindset––she dreaded waking up and leaving bed every day. however, in college, she finally realized that she needed to “step farther back and stand still [...] to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). claire changed her attitude from acting like the victim and asking “why” questions (“the right way to be introspective“ by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) to asking herself what she could do to change it. instead of being passive in her life, claire took an active role in changing things that were in her control and letting go of things out of her control. eventually, her approach towards life was no longer defined by the essays and test scores she received, instead it was defined by how she faced obstacles and felt about the things she did. “memento mori”, which means "remember your death"(“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three), was a reminder that claire kept with her throughout her entire life. the phrase served as a reminder for her to look at the bigger picture––to stop obsessing over small things out of her control and recognize the little time she has on earth and to make the most of it. as a result, claire took many risks in her life. claire did not stick to one path. she treated “planning [her] career [...] like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by center for career development moreau fye week four). she made sure all the trips she planned were ones she would not regret. and when she did begin to dislike her career, she did not stick around for financial reasons or for a sense of security. instead, she planned for another trip without a moment of hesitation. no single career or field could keep claire’s focus. her interests varied every day and she let them lead onto different paths. although she had a variety of jobs, they all had three things in common: 1) they https://poets.org/poem/do-not-go-gentle-good-night https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ brought her joy, 2) they allowed her to use her skills, and 3) they allowed her to serve others ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). claire understood that her happiness could not come at the expense of others and that her life should be “centered around [...] people”,, so she constantly made an effort to “stand [with others and] include everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). as a result, claire made an impact on everyone she met. she formed relationships with everyone she met. growing up abroad, she learned to be open and accepting of people from different cultures and all backgrounds. claire welcomed unfamiliarity with open arms because she understood how it felt to be alienated and excluded. in the process of expanding her "jurisdiction" (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven), claire realized that she could help others and depend on others simultaneously. in college, she learned to ask for help from others, something she struggled with while growing up. through conversations with friends and mentors, claire discovered that not only could others help her, but she could also share her experiences. finding her happiness and living her life was not a journey claire had to go through by herself. claire learned to be faithful and look to people she trusted for guidance. claire is remembered as an extremely independent person with a strong sense of righteousness and integrity (conversation with claire’s mom by moreau fye week five). in all the careers and areas of interest she pursued, she made sure that she stayed true to her beliefs (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). throughout her entire life, claire faced many moments where her beliefs were challenged by everyone around her. but she was not afraid to speak out against others’ views, even if they were her friends and people with power (hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). however, at the same time, claire made sure she listened to what others had to say and kept an open mind. claires open-mindedness is what made everyone respect her. do not mourn for claire. she would want you to go out and do something that makes you happy. she would tell you to take risks for the things you love and face life head-on. "memento mori", we will all die, so let us stop wasting time complaining and worrying; instead we should face the world without doubts and pursue our dreams. i hope we can all be inspired by claire’s life and let go of our hesitation and fears. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831/download?download_frd=1 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008/download?download_frd=1 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 4/25/2022 a unique endeavor it has been a long time since i have been on this world, and through that time my goals have changed immensely. i went from wanting to working in computer software, making video games, to wanting to be a neurologist. a lot of things can change at any moment, but this is something i am sure that will not change in the future. i know exactly i want to do, and that is be a doctor. however, if i had to pick an exact goal, my mission statement would be “i want to become a neurologist, so that i can help people who have some of the most difficult diseases to deal with, neurodegenerative diseases”. this is my mission statement, and i think this perfectly encapsulates exactly what i am trying to do. i already think that the path that i have already walked is in accordance with my mission statement, as i reflect on my time here as it comes to an end, a regular occurrence for me as i everyone needs a break to reflect, “ it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means ” (“why we need to slow down our lives” pico iyer moreau fye week one) . i have already taken classes that directly lead to me becoming a doctor, and my entire major revolves around learning neuroscience so that i can one day apply what i learn to becoming a doctor. however, this first year will not be as important as the next three years i have here. the first year was to get acclimated to the new environment that i will be in for the next four years. the experiences i made during that year will be invaluable, as “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or no” (“navigating your career journey ” by moreau moreau fye week four ). however, now that i know how to traverse life here, i think that, especially for my major, i am ready to begin doing the things that i really want to do here. i think that the most important thing that i must do is join a laboratory, which will probably shape my experience tremendously, as its one of the biggest commitments colleges of science student can have. a place where i will be able to learn new techniques and meet new people, creating new experiences. i am a bit scared though, as i have never experienced anything like this before. i have done research before, but never in an actual laboratory. at times, i forget the fact that some of the things i need to learn to complete my mission statement and achieve my version of the life well lived, i already do know, even if i feel as though that is not the case, sometimes “the things we are most comfortable at and the things we are most natural at are often our vocations” (“three key questions” by father himes moreau fye week three). this sometimes leads to me wanting to give up, however i feel like the difficulty of the task i have donned on myself is the reason why i see it as my mission statement in the first place. i want to leave an impact here, as small as that impact may be. that is not an easy task, regardless of the route i take to obtain it. i feel as though the biggest reason that my mission statement will lead my life for most of my foreseeable future is because it is the way that i want my “life well lived” to leave an impact on this world. i remember talking about this with my cousin about this as well during the discernment conversation, we talked about the fact that a life well lived is not necessarily one that is successful in essence. (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation” by moreau moreau fye week 5) is more about leaving an impact on the people who are around you. i took this and i feel like the best way i can try to achieve this at this point is to volunteer in activities that directly tie into medical processes. this can be in awareness, joining clubs that allow me to exercise the small amount of experience i have, to create a small change even in the nd community. these small aspects are important, as” the future is made of you, it is made of encounters” (“ why the only future worth building includes everyone ” by the pope moreau fye week seven). the small events are what lead to the life changing events, they create small changes in you as a person, shaping you slowly but surely. as my time continues at notre dame, i do not know if i will be able to take a time to stop. becoming a doctor is my primary objective for being here, and since that is the case, my experience here is going to railroaded for the path that i am taking. i feel like for one, since it is very hard to get into medical school, i tend to “fixate on problems instead of moving forward” (“the right way to be introspective yes, there’s a wrong way ” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this is one of the things that i have already been trying to change since i have gotten here and has been a big part of my development so far as i have been here. i have stumbled a bit while being here as well. some classes in which i never really got the hang of, not being in as much stuff as i wanted to be in, there is a lot of stuff i wish i did here that i didn’t, but “to have a complete and honest human story if one does not speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o malley moreau fye week two). i have only been here a year, but even though i have stumbled, i also had many triumphant moments here. i have made a lot of friends here, as that is important since,” solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). it is impossible to be some place alone, as you need those with similar goals to you to stay on track. i have also been successful at getting acclimated here, which has always been a tough thing for me. i came to the campus a week later than everyone else, which made it feel harder to get assimilated to life here as i was immediately thrusted into classes with no introduction. i hope that will not be the case in any future endeavors, but “it would be one thing if i could have been assured then, or even now, that such a thing could never happen again. my own experience proves that it can” (“'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean colemoreau fye week twelve). however, a big part of me being here is to ger better at the things i am uncomfortable with, and i feel like my mission statement needs me to be better at the things i am not good at. my next three years here will be in an environment which seeks to “create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers, and all may flourish.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac moreau fye week ten). this ideal is one in which sometimes i forgot to push through in the past. however, in my time here, i hope to make sure that the mission i want to accomplish makes sure to extend the current environment i am in and give it to others around the world. those people i give it too, i hope will extend that to others around them as well, enough to get “a thousand people to do what you want to do ” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). i hope that my time here will teach me the tools to spread that sort of harmony, one built on cooperation with others, helping each other to complete goals. i never really thought of the reason why i decided to come here. i did not realize that something like a “mission statement” could shape your entire college experience. i did not have a mission i wanted to lead my path for the foreseeable future. but, through this class i was able to create one (“ personal mission statement ” by moreau fye week thirteen ), and that was probably the most important aspect of moreau for me. i hope that i can stay on the path which will allow me to complete what i set out to do, which i feel like will not be hard to do. being here already shows me that i am already on the course to completing my goals. integration 3 moreau peggy hnatusko moreau first year experience march 4, 2022 a life well-lived is a life in christ we gather today to remember the life of father ayden james ellis. ayden’s life can be categorized into three virtues: faith, service, and leadership. first, and most importantly, ayden lived a life of faith. ayden was raised in a catholic household, with his loving parents kevin and sherryl and his older brother ryan and younger sister audrey. the life and virtues of jesus christ were instilled in ayden at a young age, giving him a clear vision of his life. as said by his childhood best friend teddy grassmann, ayden “desired above all to be a good catholic because it is his reasoning behind most all things he does and believes” (“discernment conversation activity” by university of notre dame moreau fye week five). ayden’s faith guided his life, which is why he became a priest. ayden understood how short life is compared to eternity, which is why he wanted to save as many souls as possible before it was judgment time. in the words of sister aletheia, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). life is very limited, and it is the most important thing to guide others to heaven before death. god only knows how many souls were saved by ayden’s ministry, but we can be sure that his efforts were not in vain. like us all, ayden fought through difficult times in his life. however, because of his immense faith and self-discipline, ayden never lost sight of his true goals. as dr. jihoon kim said, “now, i have experienced, you know, many incidents where god will answer my prayers and give me strength https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html when i was going through a really difficult time” (“5 minutes” by aria swar moreau fye week six). let this be an example to all of us: no matter how difficult a problem may seem at the time, god will always help us get through it. ayden’s commitment to faith throughout his life showed that he always had eternity in mind, which is a good example for all of us. ayden also showed a devotion to service through his life. ayden followed the example of jesus by being a servant for others. ayden served the most needy among us by ministering to the poor in low-income cities. he also led mission trips to south american countries to directly help those affected by crises. father theodore hesburgh said, "whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living" (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). ayden followed this motto religiously throughout his life. he knew what the truly important issues were, and he did all that he could to serve others in need. because life is so limited, he spent all of his time, without breaks, in service to others. in his own words, ayden said that the greatest problem of the time was “the rise of secularism plaguing the young generations'' (“7 clues to help you get started with the career development process” by muerelo center for career development moreau fye week four). ayden recognized that faith is the most important thing in life, which is why his greatest service to others was his ministry. in whatever crises occur on earth, every single soul will be faced with the same judgment at death, which is why his work ministering to others all over the world was so important. during his life, he emphasized how important it is to pray for all of the souls in purgatory, even those souls who lived outstanding lives on earth. everyone needs prayers, which is why we should all keep ayden in our prayers after today. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs lastly, ayden was committed to leadership during his life. ayden’s service to others will continue to last even after his death through the churches and seminaries he founded. ayden recognized the fundamental human dignity in every person, and did all that he could to save each and every person. as pope francis himself said, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted moreau fye week seven). while there are billions of people on earth, each one of us was created by god and should return to god after death, which is why ayden’s leadership in forming the next generation of priests and lay ministers is extremely important. let us all be like ayden and “lead by example,” as saint ignatius said. we ought to devote every moment of our lives leading others to heaven because there is nothing more important. ayden exhibited immense self-discipline during his life. he abstained from all distractions and earthly pleasures, so he could focus on guiding others. in pico iyer’s article about the importance of taking breaks, especially from technology, kevin kelly says, “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). ayden lived this virtue diligently. technology is very important for work and getting around in modern society, but do not let it distract you from what god has created. as ayden said, once you eliminate the distractions from your life and truly find silence, you will hear what god is calling you to do. ayden’s life is a good example of how we should all live. we should devote our lives entirely to christ. we should help others on their journey to heaven, and lead others to live the same life of service. a life well-lived is one that gets yourself into heaven and as many other https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ people as possible to join you there. as ayden now experiences eternity, let us follow in his example and pray for his soul. integration 2 constant growth in the midst of constant change this semester, i have begun to reflect upon my recent growth and development as a result of college. there is a big shift between high school and college in many ways--for me it included sports, friendships, morals, routines, and family. all these changes in such dominant areas of my life have led to a change in my personality and mindset. i often find myself questioning how i am handling situations, whether or not i made the right decision, and how to use my time in the most fulfilling and effective way. these are only a few of the many questions that have occupied my mind and urged me to reevaluate my transition to college. i have found that more often than not, people tend to go through life and forget to take time to pause and relax, especially when life feels like it is moving very fast. countless people told me my time at college would fly, but it was not until recently that i took a step back and let it sink in that we are already halfway through freshman year--an eighth of my college experience already completed. during this time, i have experienced many moments of anxiety and stress about completing my work, whether or not i have enough time, and even about when i will be able to get some sleep. in the week 9 qqc, i selected a quote that serves me as a valuable reminder that everything will work out just fine, “give yourself time to adjust” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). sometimes i feel as if i am racing against the clock, but in reality there is more than enough time, it’s just a matter of using time wisely and in the most fulfilling way. i now know that i do not need to stress about checking boxes and rushing to fit everything in, but i can allow myself to take my time and enjoy living in the moment. i have finally started to move on from my old mindset of “just wait until the weekend”, and realized that the rest of my week can also include relaxation time as well. https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html one important question that has been on the forefront of my mind lately has been: “is this all worth it?”. as we get closer to finals, i find myself growing increasingly stressed but have noticed my friends attending different universities seem to be as relaxed as ever. i do my best to remind myself that everyone has their stressors and it is all a matter of dedication and time management. this mindset has led me to find a deeper value in the work i complete and the time i spend working on homework--there is a larger end goal. in addition, the growing amount of work has led me to find a deeper value in my relationships with friends and family. in highschool, i had much more time in general and despite that i was typically around my friends and family all day. now that i am away at college, i have grown increasingly appreciative of the relationships i have fostered and realize i must continue to put effort into those relationships to maintain the joy and happiness that they provide. when learning about catholic social teaching and kintsugi in week 10 i found the quote “the good, the bad, the ugly--all of that; it has made them this beautiful, dynamic, interesting person that they are today” to be very applicable to my life (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). it is often hard to have a true appreciation for something until you have a challenging experience or contrasting experience that enables you to find greater value. every time i feel overwhelmed, homesick, or friendsick, i come out of the other side with a stronger sense of appreciation towards those relationships. you can find a greater good on the other side of struggles; they only make a person stronger. during that week of moreau, i was able to shift my mindset and admit that there is some good in the midst of the bad, since the bad can turn into valuable life lessons, feelings of regret that can incite people to take actions they were once afraid to, and a way to highlight the good. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/ one of the biggest things i have questioned over the past semester, is my close mindedness and opinionated personality. i was somewhat sheltered in high school, in the sense that i was surrounded by very like minded people, which has created a sharp contrast with my experiences here at notre dame. i can admit that many ideas that once seemed very black and white to me, now seem to have new dimensions and aspects that i had never even thought about. i considered myself to be an open person until facing the variety of opinions and ideas here at college. for example, during week 11 of moreau, we watched a video that stated “the united states is one of the most segregated places on the planet”(“diversity matters!" by professor agustin fuent moreau fye week eleven). this comment shocked me since i had always considered the united states of america to be a melting pot of races, cultures, and individuals in general. my previous idea can now be considered ignorant, which is why i have started to be more open minded and attentive to differing views and ideas that contrast my previous beliefs. i have found that some of the most educational experiences come from situations in which i end up being wrong or something is presented to me that i had never even begun to consider. all in all, diversity and differences help lead to greater knowledge and a better understanding of the ways of the world. one area i have struggled with this semester has been my faith. i am firm in my belief in god, but i sometimes find myself questioning different components of catholicism and taking my religion for granted. at home i was used to the routine of weekly mass and prayer being incorporated into my daily school routine. now at college, i am independent and must do these things on my own. i have begun to push my faith to the back of my mind, as though it is necessary in order to make room for my academics. classes like moreau and surrounding myself with faithful friends have helped me get out of this mindset and help push me to be more https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 active in my faith. during week 12, we read moreau’s commentary and some of it stuck out to me since it related to the balance of faith and academics. he believed academics should aid theology, so i am trying to use his mindset to remind me of what is truly important. the end goal is not one of academic origins, but of faith. i am still trying to work my way back to the point in which i started college, and develop a relationship with my faith that is entirely on my own terms--not my parents or my schools, but commentary like moreau’s helps stabilize me in my faith. it proves that there does not have to be a separation between faith and academics but they can both be important aspects of my life, without having to give up parts of one to make room for the other. all in all, i have often questioned the changing components of my life in the past months but it has resulted in the development of my own ideas of importance and values. integration three moreau fys march 2022 the present is the answer thank you all for being here today to remember juliana. it means a lot that you are here and i know she’s happy to see all of the people she loved together. how to begin talking about juliana? it’s a hard question for me to answer simply because there is so much she has taught us. there is so much admiration in my heart for that woman. in general it was the way she lived in the moment that inspired me the most on how i, too, want to live my life. i think i will start with the way she lived her life. the soft and steady pace with which she took every day. the way she enjoyed every moment, every laughter, every tear, and of course, every second she had to debate! what were you expecting? it’s her! i remember specifically, this one time at notre dame, we were sitting in world politics class and the period had ended. everyone sprinted out of class but she stayed, she needed to talk to the professor and tell her that the world wasn’t just made up of america. she was furious to see a world politics class be so… how did she put it? “retrograda” or close minded. she loved that word. i told her to run, we had a test next period. i said “it’s fine, let it go, we have a test in an hour”. she stopped me and held my arm as she said “the test is a problem for juliana in an hour’s time. juliana now wants to make the professor aware of her opinion”. it was the little things like this that prevented her from losing focus and kept her grounded through her life. she knew that all the distractions we have in modern times could mean “were never caught up with our lives” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau week 1). but she refused to get caught up in the trap of technology and what a fast pace life meant for humanity. her mind was very clear and she knew that she had something to do now and it was in the present that she was living, she worried about the future “later” and, later never came. she worried so little, she simply lived. how to forget the amazing work she did to reform education in the world. she started when she was 15, quite young if you ask me. she helped connect teachers to coaches so that they too, would have a guide through life. it was a form of reciprocity that she felt we had to give because of what education means for us. she was the live demonstration that “our words are buttressed by our deeds, and our deeds are inspired by our convictions” (“hesburgh”moreau week 2). she lived her life full of intention and she wasn’t afraid to support her words with actions and her actions came from the deepest part of her heart. her intention was set in the moment and the consequences of her actions were based on what she wanted to do as she acted, living fully. everything she did revolved around living, living in the present. she combatted one of the hardest moments in her life by living in the presence. she faced a tough moment of self-doubt and inner battle when she left her hometown to move to indiana for college. she then understood that “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau week 6). instead, she focused on living every second as if it were her last, and slowly rose over her depression, leaving it behind and rising above it to recover her inner peace and transmit it to everyone around her. a new york times article on sister theresa aletheia explored the idea of living life in constant acknowledgment of death. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth grahammoreau week 3) this allows one to put life into perspective and understand that it is temporary. this is how juliana lived her life, for its meaning and not for its perceived physical value. putting juliana’s life into perspective it’s easy to understand how simple it was for her to decide what actions to take, she lived in the moment understanding that it’s all for a cause greater than her. an experience that i remember her always telling me about was one she had during her moreau class. it was during her second semester and the instructor guided them to participate in a ‘speed dating’ exercise for students to get to know their peers. she was fascinated as she talked to everyone and noticed a common pattern, they all judged their success through their values. career satisfaction is measured by one’s “values, interests, personality, and skills (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course”moreau week 4). this is reflected through her various years dedicated to public policy. the impact she made in advocating for policy reforms in education was life changing for many and shows how values are the only important aspect in one’s sense of success in life. “if you live in the moment and are comfortable with who you are then, you are doing this right,” she said. i was talking to her father last night and he told me about a conversation they had during her freshman year of college. she asked them a couple of questions, one of them being “ tell me something that is hard for me to hear“ (moreauweek 5) as her parents talked to her the delicate understanding and open mind she heard them through exposed a lot about her character. “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life” (“his holiness pope francis filmed in vatican city first shown at ted2017”. moreau week 7). she experienced the true meaning of life through focusing on the love that existed in even the most uncomfortable situations. in conclusion, we can meditate through juliana’s life and understand the value that living in the moment and staying present has on whether a life is “well-lived” or not. however, the simple fact that all of us are here together mourning her death and celebrating her life with a lot of love is more than enough to know that she definitely lived her life well. capstone integration luzmariaelena flores 04/21/2022 what has notre dame done to me? this spring semester has brought upon a lot of growth in my identity and my goals. starting this spring semester, i was confused about what convections were and how that impacted my life. i have never thought about what convections in general and how that had to do with the things i wanted. at first, convection was a type of cause and concern to me. i learned that true convection is something that makes you feel complete and accomplished. a cause and concern are more like a goal while convection is a type of mindset you have. as time passed by in the first half of the semester, i also realized that i have not been in tune with my internal happiness. during moreau, i self-reflected about my academics and my meaning of happiness. for the first time, i had dropped a class and focused a little on my mental health and the way i wanted my life to turn out. i spoke to people about my concerns and mentors i had back at home to help me make a plan/ route i wanted to follow. all these things helped me make it through the first half of the semester. i learned about myself while also trying new ways of thinking and identifying. the rest of this spring semester for sure has been a tough journey. during the last week of moreau, we had to view our notre dame education as a sort of path on a mountain. reading the excerpt "stalking" by annie dillard, made me reflect on my journey and what i had accomplished this semester. ( annie dillard, 1974) now that i had reflected, i realized that my first semester was like a walking trail to a difficult hike. yes, it was tiring, but it didn't involve much self-reflection. i did well but i didn’t understand why people found college difficult. i had enough freedom and time to adjust to all my classes as well as social events. i believed that i was prepared to start the second semester. however, the second semester is when you start the hike. you begin to feel the rocks and the incline and the pressure from the air. second semester was the start of more difficult classes with new professors. i struggled with friendships as well as problems within my family. lots of different things came into play this semester that wasn’t a problem before. this made my semester much more difficult and rockier. the semester not only brought difficulties but also taught me lessons. week 9, 11, and 12 all taught me something about myself and the people around me. week 9 we watched a clip of harper lee from her novel to kill a mockingbird, "to climb into the skin of another and walk around in it. ( harper lee, 1960) we wrote about the skin we walk through and whose skin we are drawn to walk. i wrote about my experience of being a daughter of undocumented parents. i also spoke about the limitations and fears my parents had which lead to me being able to relate to other people that were experiencing similar things. most races have similar experiences and can understand what others go through. however, i also spoke about what a different skin i would want to walk through which would be that of a white person. this would be an important skill to have to be able to walk through other people's skin to understand something more about themselves and different people’s points of view. in week 11 we discussed the anti-racist vocabulary lecture. i learned about "school choice" by courtney martin. (courtney martin, 2021) i had no idea what this was going to be about. i have never heard of the term school choice. i thought about it being the school system and how that is something that needs to be changed. martin stated that parents' actions are all behind one quote “ i just want what's best for my child.” all parents want what’s best for their children. martin elaborated that this mentality makes for a ladder to appear in a parent's mind of what is best and what is worst. on the ladder, a parent chooses what is deserving of her child and who deserves the worst. this already makes a gap between the kids since all they are surrounded by is the same people with the same mentality. this is the beginning of the gap caused between those in public schools and those in private institutions. these were a few things i learned by watching martin’s video. in addition, week 12 taught me about philosophy. during this semester, i made a new friend who has a great passion for philosophy. when we talk, he is able to bring up different names in our conversation and mention their perspectives on different things. it amazed me how much he knew about each topic we talked about. he said that knowing a bit of philosophy helped him make his own decisions in life. it also allowed him to self-reflect on his inner self. i admired how confident he felt in each step of his life. reading, good life method: interview with meghan sullivan and paul blaschko, made me reflect on the fact that i have never thought about what sages i turn to or about the different perspectives on every topic. ( jack maden, 2022) i knew that there were different perspectives, but i did not try to branch out. i want to try and branch out to see different topics and different views in order to better understand the world. overall, this semester has been a rocky hike. but after dropping a few things and finding my core friends, i was able to pass through this rocky hike. in the end, i will get above the timberline and be able to look back to see the forest and all the rocks that i passed through to make it to the top. all these lessons drive me to reach the utmost peak of my mountain when i graduate from notre dame. graduating would be my pinnacle since this would be my reward for all my hardship and all-nighter pulls. professor espeseth capstone integration april 24, 2022 after spending an entire school year at notre dame, i have changed my root beliefs in a beneficial way that will change the course of how i am going to pursue a life well-lived. i’ve found that accepting failure, to focus on work that is both intrinsically rewarding and rewarding to society, and taking risks for both the betterment of myself and others as well. i think that one quote that reflects the importance of community on campus is “i’ve come to realize that one of the central things i learned in chile was how well i had been accompanied, and as such transformed” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steven reifenbergweek 9). while having as supportive of a community as notre dame, we learn to be accompanied and to accept accompaniment in all aspects of life such as school, work, and social life, that i will continue to use for the remainder of my time at notre dame. notre dame’s focus on doing work for the common good is emphasized in the characteristics of living a life well-lived. i’ve learned that being successful doesn’t just mean achieving a numeric goal, but by having a positive impact on the people around you as well. this means that your work is positively contributing to society, while simultaneously being intrinsically fulfilling. if work is not both enjoyable and externally rewarding to others, then that work cannot be called successful. as noted by pope francis, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis-moreau fye week 7). this means that inherently, human beings must give in order to give love and life a life well-lived. additionally, as noted by notre dame’s meruelo family center for career development, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course by meruelo family center for career development-moreau fye week 4). this implies that these significant milestones reached by taking risks assists self-growth by learning what you are and are not capable of doing. in instances of intrinsically satisfying work, we should feel a balance between work and downtime. “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be,” implies that when you take time away from your work, it gives you time to reflect on its importance, as well as giving you time to do other life-fulfilling activities (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico-iyer-moreau fye week 1). for the remainder of my time at notre dame, i will carefully analyze how i can take advantage of the resources available to me regarding the steps i need to take towards meaningful contributions to my community, such as considering how i can work in business in an ethical way that benefits my community. for instance, i intend on working in the business sector of the fashion industry, which is known for its unsustainable practices. in order to contribute to the common good while pursuing this desire, i intend to take advantage of the sustainability courses offered at notre dame. after stressing the importance of finding a meaningful career, it is just as important to find meaningful ways to fill your time away from work. after learning about the importance of community here at notre dame, i intend on taking the important lessons learned during the past year and apply it to other communities i belong to. one quote that stood out to me about the importance of community is, “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame”, du lac: a guide to student life-week 9). especially in a catholic community of people, we have been taught to contribute our best attributes to make the community of notre dame a better place. looking forward, i intend to not only continue to do this, but to bring the attributes of others here at school back home to my family and friends. just as we are called to contribute to our community, we are also responsible for protecting it. we have a “christian responsibility to care for each of god’s creations, especially in instances of prejudice, famine, warfare, ignorance, infidelity, abuse, natural calamity (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross”qqc week 12). this is a call for action for us to look out for each other, especially in bad times. an instance where i will implement this on campus is in times of witnessing any unequal treatment of discrimination. although it is much more rare for me to witness this on campus, there are still instances of microaggressions i witness myself or that my roommate tells me she faces. i think that to combat this, it is important for equal treatment of all is still a relevant conversation that needs to be maintained on campus. the importance of communication is emphasized by the words of dean g. marcus cole, "i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other" ('i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something' by dean g. marcus coleqqc week 12). at the same time, i find that it is important that we don’t treat people with different beliefs within a given community differently because of these beliefs. rather, i think it is good to use communication to find the best aspects of each perspective. a good criticism of this battle between perspectives that we typically find is, “we treat politics like entertainment, following the latest updates like we follow our favorite sports teams” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain mediaweek 11). when we stop looking at different political perspectives as opposing teams pinned against each other, and as a spectrum of different perspectives that have something to offer, we will move towards real change. with taking risks inevitably comes failures. accepting failure takes a different level of maturity that can realize failure is not always a bad thing, but is informative for later experiences. as discussed in hesburgh film, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human success” (hesburgh film by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week 2). i relate this claim that when viewing the entirety of the human life experience, most times we can look at the failures of their life and see how this contributed to the successes they achieved later on. i will use this message for the next three years, by viewing every failure i face in college as a way to ensure i don’t make this same mistake when i am in my career later on. although taking risks can be daunting in any scenario, whether it be taking a challenging course or asking someone on a date, you cannot reach significant milestones without doing so. when putting into perspective the short span of time we have on earth by intentionally thinking “about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future,” we can think about how small the stakes are for taking risks (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by eurich-moreau fye week 3). with taking risks comes less extreme self-analyzation, as “research suggests that self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way” by eurich-moreau week 6). by taking more risks, we are able to become less anxious with ourselves and closer to a life well-lived. by reducing the amount of stress we place on each of the decisions we make for ourselves, we are able to live a better balanced life. moreau integration one assignment the beginning of my notre dame journey week 1 searching for belonging root belief: i believe that i am searching for friends who allow me to feel comfortable to be my most vulnerable self. back in seattle, i had a very solid group of friends who i felt comfortable being my most honest self with. i was never scared to be vulnerable with them, and we often spent hours and hours letting our guards down and discussing even the most difficult topics. thus, i had a hard time coming to notre dame, where my old friends, the people who know me to my absolute core, were nowhere as accessible to me as before. being a new student at notre dame, i’m often nervous to fully be myself. without the safety of my friends, i feel the need to put on a cool exterior. subconsciously, this has led me to try and control my image and become someone i’m not entirely, which is not only unhealthy but a hindrance to being vulnerable. through brene brown’s ted talk, “the power of vulnerability,” i realized that this was because i lacked the courage to be willing to let go of who i think i should be in order to be who i am. but if i want to create the same meaningful relationships i had in high school with my peers here, it is absolutely necessary i follow brown’s messages. i admit, i’m scared to know that i must be vulnerable with a whole new group of people. still, i plan on taking these crucial steps because i know that in the end it will provide with the deep connections every student should leave with at notre dame. (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one) week 2 searching for self-knowledge root belief: i believe that honest reflection is the best way to grow as my most authentic self. my time during quarantine was a period of much self growth. for the longest time, i lived my life in a constant state of work. i was always busy, there was always something that needed to be done, and i never had the opportunity to relax and reflect on myself. thus, when the stay at home mandates were first introduced, i was truly alone with my thoughts for the first time in a while. to be honest, i was scared to be alone and have all this time where i would be able to completely devote myself to reflection. in his ted talk, “should you live for your resume or your eulogy,” david brooks credits the teachings of joseph soloveitchik when he quotes that the humble side of our nature “is built by fighting [our] weaknesses.” he continues to say “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you've committed [...] you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed.” i believe that this quote is representative of the process i eventually went through in quarantine. this message was important to me because it reminded me that becoming my most authentic self is not an easy process that comes over night. in fact, fighting my weaknesses is an ongoing journey that takes strength and time to embark on. at notre dame, i hope to continue this journey of reckoning. it is even more essential that i do so since when adjusting to a new environment, it can be easy to lose yourself. honest, deep reflection is the only way to keep myself grounded. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy” by david brooks moreau fye week two) week 3 searching for a framework root belief: i believe that i should lean on my faith during times of hardship. focus question: in what ways does faith inform how i see the world? i’ve always considered myself to be a person filled with faith, but not a person dedicated to my faith. referencing back to the constant state of work i mentioned before, i’ve always believed that i was far too busy to truly focus on that aspect of my life. and even though i now attend a catholic university, i’ve felt that way even more here at notre dame. indeed, the school work at notre dame is not easy. and after being in quarantine where my homework was easier for so long, i was genuinely shocked by the rigor of the academics here. in fact, it has become so preoccupying that i haven’t had the opportunity to take some time to relax and reflect on myself and my relationship with god. however, like father pete says, i need to understand that it is actually in these times of stress that i should be reaching out to god through prayer. stresses will always be a constant in my life, just like father pete’s shoelace knots. the real quest is not to try and diminish all of these stresses, but instead to embrace them and grow stronger through them with the help of god’s grace. (“the role of faith in our story” by father pete moreau fye week three) week 4 searching for life-giving relationships root belief: i believe that i deserve to be in relationships that promote an optimistic mindset in high school, i led a club on the importance of healthy relationships. in this club we often discussed the ten signs of a healthy and unhealthy relationship and why it is essential we are equipped with the knowledge to recognize these signs. many of these signs were similar to the ones mentioned in the grotto article. in particular, one section that stood out to me was titled “they only talk about negative things.” coming to notre dame, i’ve often struggled to remain as positive as i did in high school when my workload was easier. here, it feels natural to want to spend more time ranting and complaining about the difficulties adjusting here. however, i’ve realized that i don’t want to be the person that only talks about the negatives anymore.it is important that i instead realize how grateful i am to be a school like notre dame. furthermore, i want my friends to be the type of people who uphold this optimistic mindset. i deserve to be around people who make me feel and act my best. thankfully, i feel that the friends i have now very much reflect these ideals. these relationships are the most life-giving and will help me live a more fulfilling college experience. (“signs of a toxic friendship ” by olivia taylor moreau fye week four) week 5 identifying narratives root belief: i believe that my time is precious and that i should spend it with the people i love. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois&feature=youtu.be&ab_channel=universityofnotredamecampusministry https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ back in seattle, i never had to make the effort to actively sustain my friendships with people. i would always see my friends and family at school and home, so i never felt the responsibility to reach out and plan time to spend with them. however, at notre dame i’ve been feeling like i haven’t been making enough time for the people i care about. when talking about the lessons she learned in quarantine, laetare medalist carla harris mentioned, “i rejoice because we have all learned how precious time is and that it is the most important asset that you have.” while i can’t ignore the importance of staying on top of my school work here (even this integration itself is an assignment!), i also need to take a break from studying at times and call my friends and family. my friends and family are incredibly crucial to me and only will my life be lived to the fullest when i continue these relationships. (“laetare medalist address” by carla harris moreau fye week five) week 6 identifying influences root belief: i believe that i should be proud of the history and culture that has formed me. writing the poem for this week reminded me of many of the assignments i had during high school. one of the topics my creative writing assignments focused on my racial identity and how i’ve struggled to be fully proud of my background. as i’ve grown older, i’ve become more and more appreciative of my korean heritage, but it's definitely taken a lot of effort. i do think that connecting with my racial identity at notre dame will be harder as the school does have a much smaller asian population than i’m used to. nevertheless, it is not an option to retreat into insecurity. now more than ever, it is crucial i embrace my koreaness and carry that pride during my time here. week 7 identifying perspectives root belief: i believe that to pursue the truth, i must actively work to expose myself to diverse perspectives. coming from a school with much more diversity racially, i was a little nervous to come to notre dame. i had worried that i was going to feel confined to a community that wouldn’t embrace diversity the way my high school had. what i realized during our moreau discussion that i hadn’t thought about before however is the fact that there are different types of diversity that i can expose myself to here. don’t get me wrong, racial diversity is incredibly important. however there is a lot of value in geographic diversity that i can find at notre dame that i wasn’t able to in seattle. here, i have the opportunity to learn from peers who hail internationally, from large cities or even rural neighborhoods. it’s quite often for kids in the city to make harmful jokes about those who live in rural areas. indeed, there is this harmful narrative out there about the “redneck,” a stereotype that strips individuals of the other aspects of their identity. chimamanda ngozi adichie’s ted talk reminds us that in order to fully see someone we can’t reduce them to a simple stereotype. like adichie says, “the consequence of the single story is that it robs people of dignity.” thus i must https://youtu.be/ujswjn-syb4 work to listen to those who come from different locations than me. pursuing the truth is a long process we must all constantly be involved in. (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven) https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story michael communiello moreau fye 25 february 2022 living for my eulogy it certainly hasn’t been easy for those that knew allie to deal with her passing. she was born and raised in a small town in upstate new york. as the youngest of five siblings by more than eight years, allie was a source of positivity and cheerfulness, even in her earliest years. her sense of determination, kindness, and adventure was present throughout her childhood as she was always a favorite of her grade school teachers and friends, and was constantly up for any challenge/opportunity. at the age of 13, allie was diagnosed with burkitt’s lymphoma . her strength, courage, and positivity throughout this time serves as an inspiration to all those around her. following highschool, allie attended the university of notre dame. those that know allie also know what a big part of her life this was. not only was she appreciative of the opportunity to attend such an academically prestigious institution, allie was continuously grateful for the sense of faith, community, and tradition that she was able to experience while in her time there. as she pursued her degree in computer science with a minor in engineering corporate practice, she formed a great community of friends and supporters, with whom she kept in touch for the remainder of her life. upon graduation, allie became the first in her family to settle down on the west coast. she moved to silicon valley and began work at a tech startup. her immense loyalty is very evident as she stayed at this same company for the majority of her working life. she was able to demonstrate her leadership abilities, creativity, and determination when she was promoted to the lead software engineer position. since allie’s father also worked as a manager for many years, she was able to witness the mutual appreciation, respect, and motivation he and his employees had for each other, so a constant goal for allie was to be like him in this way. as allie’s employees here today will be able to attest, much like her father, allie was beloved by all at her workplace for her constant determination, kindness, and motivation. she was always up for a challenge, willing to help, and beyond patient with both her clients and coworkers, undoubtedly contributing to the success of her company. while allie loved her work, she loved her family even more. aside from her 4 siblings whom she was all very close to, her husband and children were the most important people to allie. allie met her husband, who was also her best friend, while they were in college together and they got married quickly following their graduation. together they had 4 children, whom allie devoted her life to raising. her family was the greatest source of joy in her life and she did so much to make their lives special and their days brighter. while there are so many things that will be missed of allie, the most notable are undoubtedly her sense of humor and appreciation for life. she could always make anyone laugh, and did so often. she had a unique perspective on life that she could communicate in such a witty way that everyone would admire. allie also demonstrated tremendous gratitude for the little joys in life. she was always so excited for small events: someone smiling at her on the sidewalk, having some extra time to bake for a neighbor, or even starting a new book. allie served as a constant inspiration to those around her in both her determination and positivity, and will be inexplicably missed. the above eulogy was written by myself, about myself, in the ways that i want to be remembered. i was inspired by several different moreau reflections throughout the semester on what it means to have a life well lived. the first of these reflections was on the article, “why we need to slow down our lives”. this impacted my decision to stress the importance of a work-life balance. in the article, iyer states, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often”. since something i value is maintaining a balance between professional and personal success, i decided to include that although i took my job very seriously and found great satisfaction in performing well, true fulfillment came from serving and spending time with my future family. week two’s reflection also had great influence on the final draft on my eulogy. much like fr. ted hesburgh, i want to be remembered for my faith, kindness, courage, and the impact i have on those around me. a quote from the documentary states, “ted was a bridge builder: among people and god, and between people.” i truly appreciated this quote as it highlights the importance of faith and the implications it has on our interactions with others. it emphasizes that not only was fr. hesburgh evidently very sociable and well-liked, he was also entirely dedicated to his vocation to the priesthood and shared his faith with others often. because this was so meaningful to me, i made sure to include aspects of my own faith life in my eulogy. since a large part of this semester’s reflections were on major/occupation discernment, i also chose to include my plans for the remainder of my academic career, as well as my career goals following graduation. in week three’s discernment activity, i was asked to ponder three important questions: is this a source of joy? are you any good at it? is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large? after reflecting on this, i have determined that a major in computer science would be most fitting for me, thus my decision to include this in my eulogy. in addition, i have also determined that the creative aspects of my personality as well as my leadership abilities would be best suited towards a career at a tech startup company where i can combine my coding talents with other skills such as business. it is also important to me that i enjoy the people i work with and that the company i work for has a mission that i am passionate about, making a smaller startup company a perfect fit. this has also influenced my addition of the engineering corporate practice minor as i feel this will allow me to be most helpful to my future employers. as the week four reflection states, “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” when you pick a major you love, you perform better, and it ultimately leads to a more successful outcome. rather than focus on which majors guarantee success, fixate on what you love to do. since this message really resonated with me, i chose to make it a big part of my eulogy. another aspect of my eulogy that i deemed important to include was the qualities about myself that have been appreciated by others in my life thus far. in my week five conversation with my father, he expressed to me that he thinks i truly value “faith, knowledge, good jokes, and sunshine” most in life. this response meant a lot to me since it does really speak to who i am: a positive person that appreciates the little things, so i felt this was important to include when thinking of how i want others to remember me. another important way i want to be remembered is for how i handled my battle with cancer. my treatment process was such an important part of my life and has impacted me in so many ways, so i thought it was necessary to include. in the week six reflection, i was so impressed with and moved by jd kim’s story. as a cancer survivor, i found myself relating to a lot of the same thoughts and struggles he was expressing. during my treatment process, it was so easy to focus on all the negative aspects of my life at the time. just as jd kim longed for the normalcy of his life prior to his accident, i also went through a long process of mourning my life pre-diagnosis. i turned to my faith, found comfort in my family, and i became so grateful for this experience that allowed me to see life in a new perspective. jd kim’s story serves as a reminder to all of the importance of appreciating life, and i would love to have my personal story serve a similar purpose for my close friends and family. a final point i wanted to include was the importance of my relationships with others in my life. whether it be my family, friends, or coworkers, i have so cherished the different encounters and interactions i’ve had with others thus far. in the week seven reflection, the importance of this to me was illuminated through the excerpt from fr. greg boyle’s book, “tattoos on the heart”. despite describing an obvious alcoholic and other gang members and drug dealers, it is very apparent that fr. greg boyle passes no judgment towards these people and treats them with respect and kindness. since i would so like to be remembered for also exhibiting these qualities, i wrote about the many positive relationships i have been able to form/ hope to form in my lifetime. works cited (“why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com)” by pico iyermoreau fye week one) (“hesburgh film (panopto.com)” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two) (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three) (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame” meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four) (“week five discernment conversation activity” -conversation with thomas bowenmoreau fye week five) (“why does god allow suffering? grotto network” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six) (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8_ jurisdiction ” by fr. greg boylemoreau fye week seven) works cited defining my well-lived life defining my well-lived life: a eulogy when reflecting on the life of , it is imminently clear that he lived a life well-lived; staying true to his values and personal convictions, thomas used his life in service of others, maintaining impactful relationships, a commitment to justice, and a strong sense of personal worth. in doing so, he lived his life to its fullest capacity, helping create change in his communities and society while achieving contentment and joy with others. ultimately, through a commitment to his most important human virtues, he was truly able to achieve a well-lived life. thomas always stayed motivated and occupied in achieving his goals. through impassioned service and activity, he used his time to its fullest capacity, seeming to pack every second with impactful work. however, he did not let this blind his focus in personal contentment and understanding; he always kept the bigger picture of life in mind through the complications of life. as stated by pico iyer in “why we need to slow down our lives,” “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). his life was certainly noisy and crowded, often without time to spare. however, he was always committed to understanding the bigger picture; how he could life an effective and impactful life. thus, his small, everyday actions were guided by a larger picture of which his life was committed to achieving. making him an effective public servant, thomas was always an active listener to opposing ideas, allowing his perspective to be built by the ideas of others. to serve others, you must first understand what issues are important to them, putting aside your prejudices to listen to others. in line with father hesburgh, who “throughout his tenure at the university, always wanted to bring in different views, whether that was a republican president, or democratic https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ president” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two), thomas always sought opposing views to build a credible opinion. by understanding that people of good-will could disagree respectfully, he always sought out the reasoning of those he disagreed with to serve them more effectively, allowing him to live out his virtue of service with greater impact. this commitment to service led thomas to live a life built on selflessness, kindness, and love. instead of focusing on material, personal growth, thomas used his life to help others grow, helping them live well-lived lives alongside him. as stated by fr. michael himes, “the central issue in being a human being, and therefore in being a christian, is what the new testament calls agape – a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other.’” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three) while thomas was not religious, he always made sure he was living by the idea of agape, gifting himself to others through public service. in doing so, he was able to make direct impacts in the lives of others, giving him personal contentment, and allowing him to live a life well-lived. thomas consistently sought out experiences, especially throughout his time at the university of notre dame, to put his commitment to agape in practice. through participation in the student policy network, judicial council, and show some skin at notre dame, thomas used his skills and talents to better his community, ultimately developing his skills in public service. these skills were largely developed through his consistent desire to take advantage of any potential opportunities; as stated by the mureleo family center for career development, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four) by taking advantage of several experiences and opportunities, thomas allowed his time at notre dame to shape him as a person and a servant. thomas allowed these past opportunities to guide him toward an impactful career in law, a profession he had discerned from early on in life. in a conversation with a high school mentor, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ it became clear that the people who knew him best were completely certain he would become an impactful lawyer who was committed to serving others through litigation (discernment activity – moreau fye week five). through experiences in illinois youth and government and the united states senate youth program in high school, he knew early on that arguing in the courtroom would be his greatest passion. those around him were confident that he could succeed in this space, living the life he had always dreamed of occupationally. one of thomas’s most prominent skills was living in the moment and not reminiscing on the past. while understanding your past is important to learn from previous mistakes and grow from failure, it is also important to live for the future, not allowing your past to ruminate within yourself as you progress to a new reality. as stated by dr. tasha eurich, describing a study on introspection, “asking “why?” in one study appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward” ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich instead of fixating on his past, thomas pushed forward to the future, creating the life he wanted for himself with a clear sense of purpose and drive. finally, and most importantly, thomas was committed to justice for all people, using his skills to advocate for the most vulnerable people of our world. oppression exists in every corner of our world; while world peace cannot be solved with one person, thomas did all in his power to create a better society during his time on earth. as stated clearly by pope francis, “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the ‘culture of waste,’ which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis – moreau fye week seven) our society no longer values human life as much as economic production. however, thomas always did; through litigation and policy advocacy, thomas fought for solidarity and peace throughout the public and private sectors, acting upon the sentiments of pope francis’s words. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript thomas’s life was defined by service and value, as he made every effort to take advantage of every opportunity at his footsteps for personal, occupational, or communal growth. he will be remembered for his strong moral convictions and commitment to solidarity and justice, and certainly lived a life well-lived. moreau s2 integration 3 the first step to a life well-lived i believe that the starting point to any life well-lived is to surround yourself with people who make you happy. as pope francis puts it, “life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). if our lives flow through the people we surround ourselves with, why not make those people ones who make us happy? if we are happy every day of our lives, aside from our accomplishments, great or small, then our lives have been lived well. if someone lives a very modest life without much material wealth, but enjoys their childhood and goes on to raise a family they love, then they have succeeded far more than someone who is rich but unhappy. it is not always apparent which direction we must go in order to be our happiest selves. the journey to being as happy as possible is “a dynamic process with movement back and forth between stages” (https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 4). it takes some trial-and-error to find what makes you happy. the important thing is that we try all that we can, whether that be different jobs, hobbies, friend groups, or places to live. thinking about ourselves in this way, we gain insight into who we are. the insight helps us “develop a vision of a life well-lived that is uniquely aligned with [our] most authentic sel[ves]” ("week five discernment conversation activity" by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 5). channeling this to our surroundings, if we “possess greater insight… [defined] as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — [we] enjoy stronger relationships (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i compare this quote to the saying “you cannot love others until you love yourself.” if you do not know everything about your inner self, you will not be able to connect with those around you. in summary, knowing more about https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ ourselves helps us choose which paths to take in order to be happy, so that we can live our lives well. expanding on what it means to be happy, happiness is the exuding of joy. joy is a product of having certainty that one has “a genuine rightness [in] how one lives one’s life” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). this confidence embellishes the way you feel about yourself, raising your self esteem and allowing you to fully embrace and exude the joy and happiness that comes with it. a lot of people struggle with having enough self confidence even though they have no reason to underrate themselves like that. if someone feels confident in every one of their actions and the way that they perform those actions, then they have no reason to not be totally sure of themselves. i like to say, “stick to your gut”. having that swagger is important in having a good time and being happy. at times, in order to be your best self, you need to settle down for some quiet time with the people closest to you. having insight about yourself is undoubtedly important, but knowing that you are fueled by your relationships with others, growing those relationships is necessary for happiness. occasionally, make a firm decision to remove all distractions and go somewhere conducive to a great conversation, where you can avoid “just doing something… [and] sit there” (text: "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). the benefits of a long and deep conversation with your companions are limitless. it is a good time, you grow your friendship, and you practice growing relationships in a natural way. nevertheless, indulging in this too often can be taxing on your free time and activity level, and it is equally important to stay busy in order to achieve happiness. completing activities with other people creates memories that last forever. often, people complain of being too busy and living “fast” all the time. contrary to what they complain about, i think that is the best way to live. doing things and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736/download?download_frd=1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ staying busy helps with the self confidence and joy mentioned above, along with the benefits it brings to our relationships with others. one of the domer dozen, michael hillmer, is busy all the time. despite being deployed while simultaneously taking night classes, michael utilized every bit of his free time in interesting ways, such as “volunteering in the local hawaiian community and playing guitar with the joint base pearl harbor-hickam mass choir” (notre dame alumni association's "domer dozen." by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 2). applying all of this to my own life, which i consider to be “well-lived” for the most part, there are definitely still things to improve on. looking at the part with other people, i never find myself alone, so i think that my relationship-building on that front is great. in fact, i probably spend too much time with other people, leading to lots of fun but also the occasional lack of addressing one of my responsibilities as a notre dame student-athlete. therefore, spending quiet time to get in tune with myself and my closest friends is something that i could devote more time to. this rerouting of my time will also help me to complete my schoolwork to the best of my ability and get enough sleep. part of what drives my self confidence, necessary in being joyful and happy, is maintaining an outstanding report card. i take pride in excelling in my classes, although i will admit that i say that currently holding a c+ in moreau. that was a product of not getting my work done and forgetting my responsibilities, having been lost in spending time with my friends. moving forward, utilizing my time effectively to get my work done and find time for deep thought and reflection will help me to be a better and more self confident friend, building those friendships and fueling the happiness that drives a life well-lived. https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ integration one professor hnatusko moreau fye 10/15/2021 walking a new path: my transition to notre dame i believe that i am searching for fulfillment through curiosity, exploration, relationships, and creativity. when my notre dame experience started with the chaos of welcome weekend, i was unsure if i was ready for college. i was nervous to start more demanding classes, establish friendships, and find comfort away from home, and it seemed difficult to do so after those three days of fast-paced scheduling. especially during the first week of school, i felt like i was in over my head. however, through the chaos, i found some amazing friends that helped to stabilize the spinning world. as brene brown advises her audience, i leaned into my nervousness and fear and let myself “be seen, deeply seen, vulnerably seen,” and through the display of my honest and authentic self, i have found so many genuinely kind individuals that have made my notre dame experience so uplifting so far (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by anchoring my interactions with others in honesty and love. so far, i have learned that college demands us to truly invest in our relationships. from new friendships at notre dame, to close friends back home and familial relationships, each individual here is the intersection of a network of connections between people that require great effort. one of the main ways i have been trying to maintain connections with my friends at home is through facetime and text. i love sharing my notre dame stories and i love to hear how they have begun the new stage of their lives. in his ted talk, david brooks cites theologian reinhold niebuhr, who claims that “nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone; therefore we must be saved by love” (“should you live for your resume or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week two). this quote shares what i have learned about relationships, especially being at a new place: relationships give our work purpose because, for me, the people that i love empower me and give my actions meaning. i believe that my purpose is to create and build something that inspires and protects others. before coming to notre dame, i heard that the grotto is one of the most sacred and beautiful places on campus. after coming to campus, i have learned that there is extreme truth in this and that there is so much more to it beyond beauty. a few weeks ago, i went to the grotto after a dorm mass, and it was one of the most refreshing experiences i have had in a while. it was a place of true quiet yet profound spirit. in his article on faith, david fagerberg defines spirituality as a concept that “concerns the real world, and how we see it, how we do it, how we approach it” (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week three). beyond the grotto, i feel that, as fagerberg describes, spirituality extends to the atmosphere; at notre dame, spirituality is the basis of education, which gives my learning a foundation of meaning. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy/transcript?language=en https://www.ted.com/talks/david_brooks_should_you_live_for_your_resume_or_your_eulogy/transcript?language=en https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i believe that i need to take care of myself and treat myself kindly, and i should pay attention to how others treat me and how i think about myself. as i mentioned above, relationships are a substantial part of the college experience. they influence our days and can either brighten or dampen our feelings. at notre dame, i have tried to be more conscious about healthy and toxic relationships especially because i have met so many people and i hope to forge such life-giving relationships here that will guide me the rest of my life. i also want to practice more self-care and treat my mind and body with more attention while balancing school responsibilities. olivia taylor mentions the idea that healthy relationships involve “two people are mutually growing and on a path toward becoming better people” (“5 signs you’re in a toxic friendship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). my intention for all of my relationships in college aligns with taylor’s comment. in helping to build up others, i am learning about myself as well. i believe that i grow by continuously challenging myself and leaning into discomfort. recently, it seems as if there is no end to my academic work. whenever i finish one assignment, another seems to immediately pop up. deadlines pile up and i find myself with little time to relax. at times like this, i remind myself that, in the bigger picture, one busy week is but a small stepping stone to accomplishing my goals and giving back to those who have put me in this fortunate position. this is similar to a point that father sorin makes in his letter to father moreau after arriving at the spot that is to be notre dame: “truly, it is somewhat cold here; but, though at times the blood does not circulate freely through one's members, provided the heart still beats with love for the work of jesus, mary and joseph, what more is needed to make happy the christian, the religious?” (fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). despite the long cold journey, sorin still celebrates. this university is founded on the idea that there is joy in difficult work, and i appreciate the down-to-earth and determined attitude that many students at this school possess. i believe that i am made to honor my family and carry on their legacy and intentions towards the future. in my i am from poem, i primarily talked about fond experiences from my childhood and home, such as monday night dinners at my grandparents’ house with my cousins and late-night drives home from school. these little experiences remind me that through happiness and struggles, i need to enjoy every moment because, especially at notre dame, time flies unusually fast. i believe that my community should work to uplift each other with respect and an abundant willingness to listen, learn, and even change our opinions. as a person of asian descent, coming from the very diverse city of los angeles to notre dame, which is a primarily white institution, was a bit of a culture shock at first. however, as i mentioned above, i have met a wide variety of individuals with different backgrounds that have welcomed me wholly. chimamanda ngozi adichie speaks about the danger of a single story in her ted talk and asserts that “we regain a kind of paradise” when we reject a single-sided story (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). at first, i was scared that i would become a single story due to my appearance, but fortunately, i have found that https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/transcript people here really want to understand each other, and i am grateful for the friendly atmosphere i have encountered in my dorm, in classes, and in every interaction i have faced. integration three : moreau first year experience: integration three 03/04/2022 the prolific life of an ordinary girl for all the years that i knew , i knew her to be free-spirited and down to earth. her will to fight for the better in the endless cycle of injustice and inequality was an accurate representation of how far she was willing to go for others. as her friend, colleague, classmate and confidant, i can safely say that she was one of the best persons that i have ever known, and it is with a heavy heart that i give this speech to recount her life. as father hesburgh of the university of notre dame said, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes,” (hesburgh film, moreau fye week two). given that, i will try to be as honest as possible in narrating her life, including both her successes and failures. she was one of a kind, in both her work and personal life. once, in college, she called me for help on an assignment which focused on self and career discernment. it was simple enough where i would answer the questions, giving my honest opinion on her, and after all these years, one question really stuck with me. she asked, “what would i want to change in the world?” (moreau fye week five), and the answers swirling in my mind were endless because she was one person always affected by the misfortune of others. so, i settled on a broad overview, simply saying social issues, but of course, she asked me to expand. i mentioned the majority of things i knew her to be passionate about, including racism, global health, educational equity, sex discrimination, accesibility to healthcare, and equal human rights for all around the world. she told me after that she never realized she could do so many things in one lifetime but she would try. and she did. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/u/1/d/1odebgrvorveufdapka04tptffydrzha9epar40jkr74/edit if you knew kimberly, you knew that she was both a friend, a therapist and so much more. sometimes, this blunt honesty landed her in hot water with her friends, but the truth was better than a lie. this little character trait of hers made her a great listener, and i would frequently go to her for advice, especially when trying to navigate college. when trying to decipher my major, there was so much pressure placed on me by my family. i thought that the act of choosing a major meant that my life was set in stone, but kimberly told me that deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life, (meruelo family ccd, moreau fye week four). about a week later, i declared political science as my major, and today i am a successful lawyer, as many of you know. she took this five star quality of hers into her preferred field of clinical psychology, where she opened her own private practice. true to her passions, she strived to make mental care affordable for her clients by drastically reducing the prices for newcomers and taking on donors. she also tried to help her clients when it came to navigating real life financial difficulties outside of her office. not only did she open a mental health clinic for the people most vulnerable who have a hard time speaking up, but she also actively fought for justice and equality in every sense of the word. her resilience when it came to fighting for a better world was unmatched, as she spent the majority of time taking on pro-bono clients who were directly affected by acts of injustice committed against them or a loved one. she regularly volunteered at her high school alma mater as an after school tutor on most days and a clinical psychologist on the others. her flexibility was admirable, as she loved to fill every block and wisely used her time to help others in need. she said that “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart,” (tattoos on the heart, father greg boyle, moreau fye week seven). the same thing can be said for kimberly, as she https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 sought to help those in communities where help was not normally offered. offering a helping hand to those in need was her way of giving back to the communities that served her when she was younger. however, all her success did not come without failure. kimberly’s biggest challenge was her ability to overthink with her mind going one hundred miles per hour. her cry for help was once received by myself, as she realized that she took on too many things at once. i mentioned a quote from an article i read prior, stating that, “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break,” (why we need to slow down our lives, iyer 2014, moreau fye week one). and she took my advice, which almost never happens, but she slowed down her life for a month or so, and after the fact, she was way better than she initially was. when i asked how she did all these things without feeling the pressure of long lasting burnout, she quoted father michael himes, saying “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied,” (three key questions, father michael himes, moreau fye week three). kimberly was joyous, and that was better than being happy. she took pride in knowing and feeling that even if she was dissatisfied at some points in her life with the amount that she was juggling, there would still be joy. she would still be in a state of fulfillment with all that she had accomplished and continued to accomplish. it was never a matter of how happy the work would make her, it was about whether the work she did made a difference in a good light, and that was enough joy to last her a lifetime. overall, she lived a wondrous life. if she were here, she would, of course, give us all one piece of advice. with all the personal obstacles that we face daily when trying to figure ourselves out, she would say that “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future,” (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, moreau fye week six). the key to https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/468294?module_item_id=143819 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ finding ourselves and being in a permanent state of joy, is asking what instead of why. it gives us the most positive outlook instead of keeping us in a negative self-loathing cycle. week 14 capstopne intergration three so originally my mission statement was focusing on the spiritual side of things. after contemplating heavily on what that means for me i have changed a few things but ultimately it is the same. i believe that when it comes to determining what values are important to me in terms of living a fulfilling life, i’ll have to truly understand the meaning of the various different values i have. i often don’t even know where to start in terms of listing the values.it wasn't until this semester that i sat down and actually thought about what i consider to be a well-lived life. i believe that how i grow spiritually throughout the course of my life is at the very center of living a life well-lived for me. how strong has my faith become as i near the end of my life and have overcome numerous challenges? in keeping with this theme, i recently had an interaction or, more accurately, an insight into some events that are taking place in my life at home. i am the youngest of three children. two of my siblings do not have a college education and are not living the lives that my parents or god desire for them. as a result, i believe it is critical to remember that "fear of the lord is the beginning of wisdom" (proverbs 9:10). and just a few weeks ago, this quote came to me out of nowhere, and i know it to be true on a far deeper level. and it pertains to my life and the lives of those around me, and i believe it reflects why my siblings aren't doing so well. so, with all of that said, my biggest takeaway is that if i continue to strengthen my faith and grow closer to god, i will gain wisdom in all areas of my life. there are a few examples i’ve discovered throughout these past 13 weeks that i believe will help animate my life for the next 3 years in terms of strengthening my faith and growing spiritually. for week 1, the overarching theme was about unwinding or decompressing. the reading by pico lyer really resonated with me. specifically the way congressman tillman puts emphasis on unwinding and relaxing the body. it was also pleasing to see how “meditation” has so many positive effects on our mental and physical health. for me, “meditation” or the recognition of god's presence always does the trick when i am feeling anxious and overwhelmed. this aligns with my mission statement. by following and applying this mission statement i believe others will see it coming to pass, meaning that others will see the spiritual growth. a concrete example of this could be me attending campus bible study gatherings to dive deeper into practicing and applying the things i learn from those sessions. in week two the hesburgh video really depicted how i would want to live a fulfilled life. throughout the video was see multiple moments where hesburg really shows how selfless he was. i believe that trying to be as selfless as he was is how my mission statement will animate my life. primarily putting others before myself on any occasion is how i believe i can show how important my mission statement is to me. in week 3 we discussed how to guide a life well lived. i came across one particular reading that stood out to me and at first gave me a very unsettling feeling.the headline of ruth graham's piece in the new york times, "meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die," was initially off-putting to me, but after reading it, i realized what she meant. she essentially wants us to keep the fact that we will die someday in the back of our heads so that we can live each day like its our last. for me this is applicable to my mission statement because if i am able to remind myself each morning that my time is limited here. i will be even more motivated to be who i want to be and who god wants me to be. it will become easier for me to grow spiritually knowing that my clock is constantly ticking. as a result of this some examples of how this will appear in my life will be me ardently seeking to know god. in week 4 we talked about the many different ways to feel like you have lived a life well lived. the major focus of this week was how we can feel fulfilled with th career path we have chosen. the reading called “navgating your career journey” stated that planning our career was almost like planning a trip. i personally feel like deciding what i want to do for the rest of my life isn’t as easy as planning a trip. i do know that whatever my career will be, whether it be me pursuing being a pastor or anything of that nature it will involve me doing something that pleases god. it could be in any area. my main point here is that even if my career involves me setting behind a desk, my mission statement while be animated through how i influence others to choose the path of god and as a result of that i believe this ai another example of how the spiritually growth can occur. week 5 to me kind of goes back to week 4. what i mean by this is in week 5 the main focus is what role others play in discernment. i say it applies to week 4 because other people can help me know if i have choosed the right career path and on top of that, if i am sticking to my mission statement and living it out day by day. so this would look like me considering and valueing other peoples opinions in certain situations. in week 6 we discuss what our own personal obstacles are when it comes to a living a life well lived. their is one big obstacles for me and the video by aria swarr is a perfect example of it. in the video he talks about his experiences and what lead to him being in a wheelchair. the main takeaway for me from the video is how despite his circumstances he chooses to be positive and linflucence other to do the same. this is one obstcacle i struggle with because i often time really dwell on the negative and just have a poor mind set about certain things. i believe by applying his approach to negative situations to my personal life i will be able to strengthening my faith even more and stay on track with my mission statement. in week 7 the main focus is relationships of a life well lived. i would argee that good fruitful relationships is key. finding a group of friends that are just as invested in growing spiritually as i am is how i can try to accomplish this mission in the next 3 years. moving on to week 8 we talked about defining a life well lived wher i wrote my own eulogy. as a result of my mission statement i think a concrete example of me applying it to my life would b eme becoming more involved into the community and impatcing it positively. in week 9 we discuss responding to suffering. i was drawn to a quote that said “ they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done.” for me this is something i aspire to do, to be able to be their for other regardless of their background. in week 10 the main topic is embracing humanity. we see examples of this in the reading by dr.robin d’angelo. “race really doesn’t have meaning to me”, i choose this quote during that week and it is part of what it means to grow spiritually. it means embracing everyone and all of our differences. in week 11 we conversed about growing in wisdom. i was really interested in the video by dr. paul blascho where he said “ we need to be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” stepping out of my comfort zone will allow me to gain wisdom by meeting new and very intelligent people who will contribute to be strengthening my faith over these next few years. in weeks 12 and 13 we dive into how we can act with courage and create our owen personal mission statements. we see in week 12 the reading by marcus cole he talks about his experiences and how he is being courageous now. developing the courage to be more self less and put other before myself will allow me grow even more spruitally and i can apply over the next 3 years by doing small selfles acts throughout campus. last is week 13 and this is when i created my own mission statement. pedro mattos bellizia a life well-lived: the story of pedro, the power of education: from a dreamer to an achiever my name is pedro mattos bellizia i am from são paulo brazil, and ever since i was little, i’ve always wanted to make a difference. i hope that over the course of my life this goal has been successful. in order to achieve such a feat, sacrifices and hard decisions had to be made, as the only way forward is through. as mentioned, ever since i was young, i wanted to change the world as a child, i was always fond of superheroes the incredible deeds which they accomplished through a mixture of strength, wit, and expertise were looked up to by myself and countless others. though in particular what really stood out to me were the ‘powers’ said heroes wielded as they were the means to the end, they were the tools heroes used to effect change. through the eyes of my young self that is what i lacked. at that time i was still unaware that ‘powers’ come in many different forms. i once thought that powers could only be flying, super strength web-shooting, and so on. though it was through my time in school that which i learned about the power of education. as i grew up, i realized that education was undoubtedly the most influential power, helping all those who pursue it get closer to their goals in life. not only did i learn this by acquiring perspective-changing knowledge, but also by being involved in community-based social projects. at the age of 13, i became a member of the first project i ever joined which strived to help the elderly in a local shelter. in one of the many visits, i engaged in a conversation with an elderly woman, and she mentioned how she didn’t accomplish all the goals she had in mind. i asked her why and she said it was because of a lack of opportunity, more specifically the barriers she had towards earning an education. at that moment i started to grasp the vitality of this power, then i realized that in order to effect change i need to have a strong grip over this. the first life-changing step was my decision to study abroad. i reckoned that the educational opportunities available outside of brazil are vastly superior, thus i set aside all ‘my chips’ with the goal to study abroad. i told my parents about my ‘battle plan’ who even if a bit skeptical at first, fully supported me in this journey. applying to college was a big step that amounted to various struggles such as a 9-hour car trip to a neighboring state to take the sat exam. i can now say with clarity that i am grateful for this time period as it helped me grow as a person and placed me in a delightful town called south bend. notre dame was the step in which i learned the most, here i acquired new and sharpened the tools i already had to create a future my younger self would be proud of. the education and experiences which i came to have through my time here are invaluable. it was through this step that my dreams became of reach. i became able to pursue my career by helping people, the environment, and most importantly the world through the power of education and conscientization of world issues. pursuing a career in analytics, business, and data science i learned how numbers can be more qualitative than one might imagine and it was through this notion that i began cementing the change i dreamt of achieving as a child. for some time i worked in the corporate world, where i put my theoretical skills to practice truly learning what it would take to change the world. it was there where i saw my opportunity to start my own business. as an entrepreneur, i had to be relentless, motivated, and hard-working so that my goal could be achieved. even if work was essential to achieve the goals, i learned through time that it is crucial to maintain a balance with pleasure. many can see this as unproductive, but i often had my best ideas away from work along with the sheer fulfillment of it all. pico lyer (why we need to slow down our lives – pico lyer – moreau fye week one) described this view by saying that ​​“the more time spent away from work the better that work will be”. another lesson that i learned was that of being strong-willed and relentless, even if it may come out as stubbornness oftentimes. it was through my studies in notre dame that i comprehended this view when reading about father hesburgh and his deeds. father hesburgh was challenged by the catholic church regarding religious freedom. hesburgh aimed to forge inclusivity in notre dame and by so he defied the catholic church saying that he (hesburgh film father hesburgh – moreau fye 2) “took a vow of obedience, but i had to draw a line, at a university you can’t censor ideas if they disagree with your own.” father hesburgh conveyed the strength of will and character attributes which have helped me a lot over the years. as mentioned, said trait can be perceived as stubbornness though it is through this restlessness that true change can be achieved, as the first step to effect change is the desire to do so. st augustine reinforces this view as he said (pastoral constitution st. augustine moreau fye 3) “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing… indeed it’s the best thing about us. it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!” st. augustine’s perspective elucidated be about the virtues of being stubborn and not giving up. this notion has deeply helped me in my career and studies, as once i faced an obstacle i was always empowered to find a solution. it was through this dissatisfaction or ‘stubbornness’ that i found my true calling. earlier in my life when deciding what to do for a career i was always unsure, trying to decide between different topics, classes, and essentially majors. it was then that i stumbled into incremental advice, (career development reflection meruelo center for career development moreau fye 4) “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." it was through a much-cherished conversation with my mother that i was able to better understand my place in life (conversation moreau fye 5). she encouraged me to be the best version of myself, even though i had heard many times before, this time it was different. during this time, she helped me understand myself better and essentially guided me to choose to pursue a career in business analytics. moreover, another important lesson taught to me is that of faith. in the first stages of my life, i was unsure of the virtues of faith and the benefits of following its path, though as i grew older this perception abruptly changed. at my time in notre dame, i learned about the benefits of a life in faith, and i believe that this was the catalyst to shape my life spiritually. it was then where i learned the power of faith in education and how they work side by side to construct a balanced individual. dr kim, a tetraplegic scientist explained that “suffering is part of our lives it is always there it is about how to respond to suffering with god?” ( grotto 5 minute video dr. kim moreau fye 6) his story inspired me and helped cement the importance of faith for me. its virtuousness was present across my life and helped me in many different instances. beginning my concluding remarks, i’d like to say that if there was one think i learned through my life, it was the importance of helping the other. it is by helping people that a life is well lived, and it is through pope francis’ remarks through which i would like to begin the end of my eulogy: "let us help each other, all together, to remember that the 'other' is not a statistic or a number," he says. "we all need each other." ( why the only future worth building includes everyone pope francis moreau fye 7) overall, i believe i have had a good life and would like to thank all present for enriching my life. thank you all, as i go on to the next chapter, i’d like to say that i hope everyone present can enjoy life as much as i did. wishing you all the best. your’s sincerely, pedro. moreau capstone integration part one (mission statement): like most people, i would say the most important thing in my life is my family and friends. in good times and in bad times, i find i am the happiest with them and know that they are the relationships that i will have for the rest of my life. however, that is not unique to me. again, like most people, my faith is very important. i was raised and confirmed in the catholic faith and have gone to catholic schools all my life. one somewhat unique tradition that i find essential to my faith is service. going to a jesuit high school, we were constantly reminded to be “men and women for others.” several classes that i took were service integrated classes where a component of the class was using what we learned to go out in the real world and give back to the community. to me, without service, faith and religion would be incomplete. having a close relationship with god through prayer and service is obviously very important but using that close relationship to make a positive impact on our community and those around gives substantial meaning to our religion during our time on earth. overall, i believe a unique aspect of mission in this world is found in service. part two: throughout the year, the main opportunity the main opportunity i have had for service is through the dismas house of south bend. this social service organization provides opportunities for ex-convicts. after being released from jail, it can be very difficult to find a job since they are often put at the bottom of candidate lists when applying for jobs. this organization, though, helps these ex-convicts find jobs and being reintegrated in society. my dorm has supported dismas house by using the money we make from dorm events to donate to dismas house. just a few weekends ago, we held a mini golf tournament that cost $5. i helped to work the desk where we were selling tickets and t shirts and made around $2,000. hosting this event was a simple and fun task, so knowing that the money we made it from went a good cause was an added benefit. while i am enjoying running these events, we have not had many opportunities to directly work with dismas house. throughout high school, i volunteered at a community center for younger kids who did not have a place to go after school. many of these kids came from low-income families and could not afford paying for after school programs at their actual schools. while the town this was in was just 10 minutes north, the group of kids who i worked with were from” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole-moreau fye week 12). my community growing up was sort of a bubble where everyone had the same experience, so to work with kids who had a different background than me, showed me how similar they were to me in terms of interests, but also the things that i took for granted growing up. while working with kids from low-income families is one thing, directly working with ex-convicts is another. in my mission statement, i discussed how going to a jesuit high school was a large part of why i hold service to be such a large part of my faith. one jesuit role model who i read about frequently was fr. greg boyle s.j. who we also read about in moreau. in the reading we had for moreau he had one quote that really stuck with me which was “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgement, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle s.j.-moreau fye week 7). in, this quote the statement that sticks out the most is “close both eyes; see with other one.” this is especially relevant in working with ex-convicts, as fr. boyle did. as explained earlier, ex-convicts are often judged for their past actions and are not given the chance to be rehabilitated. fr. boyle is asking us to think and see with love, and not judgement. this is what i believe my faith is about and this practice perfectly manifests itself in service. while i believe service is a quintessential part of faith, the actual practice of going to mass and practicing my faith is essential. in the “hesburgh” documentary, fr. austin collins was interviewed and said, “when we think about fr. ted, we cannot really talk about him and the decisions he made without talking about his faith” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week 2). people of faith allow this faith to impact their daily decision and choices. in the example of service, the catholic faith and scripture teach us that “whoever has two shirts must share with the one who has none, and whoever has food must do the same” (luke 3:10-11). by going to mass, hearing scripture, and receiving the eucharist, we cement our faith and allow to guide us in our lives. at notre dame, i have tried to take this one step further and volunteer as a eucharistic minister at sunday and thursday mass in my dorm. i live in dillon hall and every thursday, we have milkshake mass where students from around campus gather for mass and milkshakes afterwards. gathering with not just my own dorm community, but students from other dorms to celebrate our faith together. for my college decision, i was deciding between a non-catholic school and notre dame and am glad i chose notre dame for several reasons, one of them being the catholicism. while it obviously allows me to practice my faith easily, i feel as though the community is close because of our common identity. integration three teasley 1 professor espeseth moreau first year experience 4 march 2021 learning to live early in his life, william learned that the best way to help others is by finding a hobby or choosing a profession that he genuinely enjoys doing. this motivates you to put your best foot forward in whatever you wind up doing. as the notre dame career center wrote, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life! everything you’ve done to this point, as well as all the interactions you’ve had with others, have already started shaping your vips. ” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). william lived out this quote by never being afraid to try new things. by doing so, he was able to find something he was truly passionate about. using his experiences, he was able to figure out what he does and does not like to do. when you enjoy what you do, your own happiness and satisfaction with your work will incentivize you to work harder for and give more to your community. for example, in his junior year of high school, william worked at chick-fil-a. william quickly realized that he strongly disliked the monotony of working in a kitchen. he realized he was not incentivized to serve others well. this experience taught him that working in fast food is not the best way that he can serve those around him. it also taught him the importance of enjoying your career to perform better. this allowed william to search for other jobs that he genuinely enjoys, allowing him to serve his community in the most effective way. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ teasley 2 while putting himself out there and exploring new interests, william learned the value of meditation. as pico iyer stated, “don’t just do something. sit there.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). although it seems counterintuitive, sometimes we need to do less to do more. people want to be productive and move fast. this quote points out that sometimes the best thing for us is to just sit there and meditate and take a break from our work and from overloading ourselves. as research has shown, taking a break will ultimately make us more productive. william realized this on his way back to school from winter break his freshman year of college. before coming back to school, he spent his final hours at home rushing to pack and to see his friends and spend time with his parents and siblings. typically, when he drives, william loves to listen to his 80s rock on full volume to keep his energy going. on the two hour car ride back to school, however, being by himself for the first time in a while and on his way to begin the second semester of his college career, he decided to drive in silence and reflect on what kind of semester he wanted to have and on what kind of person he wanted to ultimately become. this car ride allowed him to clear his head and create a guide for what to do in the coming semester. william finally got a chance to evaluate what was keeping him from accomplishing his goals and come up with a plan to eliminate his excuses. william also soon realized that too much of the wrong type of meditation can be harmful. too much self reflection on the things you cannot control can be negative for your mental health. as tasha eurich noted in her study of people who do various amounts of self-reflection, “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives. what’s more, these negative consequences seemed to increase the more they https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ teasley 3 reflected” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). it might be easy to assume that those who reflect on who they are more often would be confident with who they are and with where they are going because they have spent more time thinking about it. however, this study suggests that those who reflect on themselves more are more likely to be stressed, depressed, anxious, and less satisfied with their lives. therefore it seems like we should spend less time reflecting on ourselves and more time doing things that make us happy or that make us feel productive. this study taught william that he should focus more on the things that he can do and the talents he had instead of focusing on the traits he could not possess, like wishing to be taller. william often found himself comparing himself to his taller, stronger, and smarter friends and wished that he could be like them. however, to live a life well-lived, william accepted the things that he could not control and began to focus on the things that he could control by working out and studying more. when meditating in the right way, william wondered how he wanted to be remembered. he came across a quote from fr. michael himes, which read: “the central issue in being a human being, and therefore in being a christian, is what the new testament calls agape – a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other.’” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). william realized that the definition of the word agape aligns most closely with his definition of a life well lived. william believed that a life well lived should be guided by a desire to help others. he also believed that it is important to genuinely enjoy what you are doing in order to maximize what you are providing the community with because when you enjoy what you do, your own happiness and satisfaction with your work will incentivize you to work harder for and give more https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/471135?module_item_id=145929 teasley 4 to your community. reflecting on this, william decided that he wanted to be remembered for his passionate assistance to others. fortunately, william was in the best position to learn how to help others. william attended the university of notre dame, which father hesburgh once described as “a crossroads where all the intellectual and moral currents of our times meet in dialogue. a place where all of the burning issues that affect the church and the world today are plumped to their depths in an atmosphere of faith, where differences of culture and religion and conviction can coexist with friendship, stability, and even love” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). notre dame is a place where students are called to solve problems in an environment where a multitude of perspectives are present and many different cultures are celebrated. much like father hesburgh’s accomplishments, notre dame puts many different cultures and backgrounds into conversation and produces solutions. william used the skills he learned while at notre dame to become a leader in the aerospace industry to lead not just his country, but all of humanity into the next frontier. he made sure that all were equally represented. when deciding what he wanted to do with his life, a conversation with his mother made him realize that engineering was his passion (moreau fye week five). she told him a story about when william was in second grade and building legos. she had bought him a 1,000 piece imperial star destroyer lego set for christmas. she told him that he spent the next two days locked in his room putting it together. when he finished and was excited to show her the completed build, his twin brother smashed it back into a thousand pieces. instead of getting upset, william picked up the pieces and went back to his room to rebuild the ship. william’s https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 teasley 5 mother told him that as he grew up, he had always immediately looked for solutions to problems. it is this quality that she thought made william a great engineer. at notre dame, william learned that one of the most important traits of a good leader is empathy. as pope francis said, “as i meet, or lend an ear to those who are sick, to the migrants who face terrible hardships in search of a brighter future, to prison inmates who carry a hell of pain inside their hearts, and to those, many of them young, who cannot find a job, i often find myself wondering: ‘why them and not me?’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). this quote stood out to william because it offered a new perspective for the way he saw others who are less fortunate than him. william learned to put himself in their shoes and realize that we all have needs, desires, and feelings. this realization made william into an inclusive leader who cared about those he led. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript eulogy integration assignment #3 prof. reaume moreau fye 4 march 2022 lasting footsteps: the road to tomorrow we all gather here today to celebrate and remember the life of john charles scheller. those who know john can agree when say with full confidence that he is one of the most unassuming but boisterous, personable but sometimes disagreeable, and kind but maybe too much, people i have ever met in my life. john, towards the end of his life, lived and embodied the sentiment to leave each day like it is your last. and that is exactly what he did. he never took a day for granted and he lived his life to the fullest – each waking moment in hopes of producing the most amount of good and happiness he could. john grew up in a small town outside of phoenix, arizona, to two loving parents – matthew and cynthia scheller. he was born the third of four, having three other siblings – sara, matthew, and megan. growing up, john had an amazing childhood. he was provided with everything a child could need, and he began his education in pre-school at st. thomas aquinas catholic grade school (where his mother worked as principal for eight years). throughout his elementary and middle school years, john’s development sprouted, and those around him were beginning to visibly see the potential that he had. after his success in middle school, john ventured on to his father’s alma mater, brophy college preparatory, a place john would soon call his own. as the younger brother of a current brophy junior, john’s freshman year was nothing he wrote home about. going to a prestigious high school, john suffered from comparisons he made to other students, and he fell into a dark part of his life. it was only until he took a step back from hyper-analyzing every aspect of his life that he began to find himself again. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this is one of the most important lessons john learned in life. because it is not at all about what other people think about your life; it is your life. ever since john was a freshman at brophy, those around him noticed a change in him – a change that affected how he interacted with them, showed his emotion towards them, and reciprocated his love. recognizing this change within himself was one of the most important lessons john ever learned. once he took a couple of steps away from the painting that was his life, he could see it for what it truly looked like. and that’s an amazing thing. through this self-realization came with it change. john started to become more of the person that he wanted to be. every effort he made and every interaction he had was purposeful. it was the first step in him firstly believing in the person he wanted to become, and actually becoming it. fr hesburgh once said, “the assumption people have is that every time you have change, it's bad. i say my assumption is that change is the price of progress” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). this was something that john took to heart and never let go of. because change is not something that should be frowned upon or something that people try to avoid – change is necessary. because with change comes the insight of knowing who you were before along with the knowledge of how you are better now. that is something john would want everyone to take away from his life – that he changed himself for the better. another tenet of life that john deeply believed in is the development of your gifts and talents intertwined with your vocation for the good of others. as boston college theologian fr. michael himes once said, “is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible?” (“three key questions” by fr. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ michael himes moreau fye week three). this is something john believed wholeheartedly. he would always remind us that over the course of our lives, we are constantly learning. we are learning about ourselves, and learning about the world and others around us. one of the greatest things we could ever learn is about how we can foster the talents and skills we have been given in the service of others. john learned this about himself in his freshman year of undergrad at notre dame. in his moreau first-year experience course, he was pushed beyond his boundaries of comfort to really challenge what he sees from his life ten, fifteen, twenty years down the road. he was forced to become vulnerable and let go of any unrealistic dreams he had about his future, and he allowed the gifts he was blessed with by god to tap into his life – his ambitions and desires. and this was also the defining moment in his life when he decided he wanted to follow his grandfather’s footsteps and become a physician. this unraveled plan for john was not merely a momentary realization, rather it was every experience up to that point that had this vocation align with his life – with his morals, beliefs, and aspirations. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). john always held that this is one of if not the most powerful way of approaching some of life’s biggest questions. we all fall into the sin of trying to control every part of our life, from family life to a career – we are all guilty. yet this statement was so important to john because at its root is the basis for his life motto as many of you might know: “everything happens for a reason.” i would bet the over that probably 50% of you gathering here today have heard him say that at one point in his life. it is what he believed most in life simply because it is true. beyond its metaphorical meaning, it is true. no matter what obstacle you might go up against in life, no matter what challenge comes your way, john would just tell you that it’s all ok… because it was meant to be that way. john also lived his life with the belief that life is not so much about status and money as it is about making people happy in life, being a good person, and letting that define you. so https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ often in our lives do we look to other people’s success and we envy them. this causes nothing but pain and suffering because its primary byproduct is you drawing lines between people. you see others as the ones who “made it” and those who didn’t. this was something john stood behind to the very end. so often in life do we make these walls that exclude ourselves from others. “there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). and these barriers do nothing for us except weigh us down. john lived his life to the fullest by tearing down each of these walls with the hope of creating a genuine connection with every person he meets. this ties into a piece of advice that his older sister, sara, once told him as a freshman in college: “the world is full of superficial people that try to sell you the idea that status and material things bring you happiness. status is not more important than the way you treat people. material things or even what you achieve in life means nothing if you’re not humble” (“sister advice” by sara scheller moreau fye week five). this is everything that john lived by. his life was devoted to the understanding that true happiness comes not from worldly things but from within – how we treat other people and how we express our happiness. and this advice came at the perfect time for john when he heard this as a college student at notre dame because he was in the middle of discerning between a career in medicine or business. and with this piece of advice, his mindset became firm on the career that would allow him to help the most amount of people, truly using each of his talents to the fullest – and that was in medicine. as was echoed throughout this eulogy, there were so many parts of john’s life that are memorable and are beautiful to share. yet, if there was one thing that he would want everyone to take away from this celebration of his life, it is that life is not about complaining about what we aren’t able to do or what we don’t have, it is about making the most out of what we do have. “i want to encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others, or what we can do already, instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by the grotto moreau fye week six). because this is precisely the key to life well-lived – a life that john lived https://www.amazon.com/tattoos-heart-power-boundless-compassion/dp/1439153159 https://www.amazon.com/tattoos-heart-power-boundless-compassion/dp/1439153159 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 well. so, let us together celebrate the wonder-filled life that he did live, and pray that his soul might rest on forever. john, your song might have ended, but your melody lingers on forever. may the lord now embrace you and hold you in his love eternally. rest in paradise, brother. integration 3 “the butterfly effect” if i were to die today, i’m not sure if i would be content with my life. not that i think i’ve lived a bad life or anything, i’ve dealt with complicated challenges, achieved big things, moved a couple of times, and have a good understanding of what type of relationships make me the happiest. however, i still think there’s a lot left to learn and experience in the years to come. today, i’ll be reflecting on my life, the things that i’ve learned about myself in the past couple of months at notre dame, and how i think that might impact the way i want to live and be remembered. i’m a person who believes suffering always serves a purpose, whether it aids our coming to an internal realization or it has an impact on someone else, suffering never comes without a reason. one of the biggest pains i’ve felt in my life has been leaving my older brother and dad in el salvador when i moved to new york. we all knew it was the right decision for our future and that they would eventually join us (hopefully soon!) when their residences were approved. at this moment i really wish i would’ve heard this: “life isn’t just about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives, always there, it is about how to respond to suffering from god.” (5 minutes: a grotto short film, by dr. jihoon kimmoreau fye week 6). when i first got to new york, and similarly when i came to notre dame, it felt like everything was to endure the suffering and i never asked myself about responding to it. after a while, i eventually found out that i could turn the pain or loneliness into something else that could heal. i heard somewhere that challenging times in our lives are just periods of accelerated inner growth, and i couldn’t agree more because “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die, by ruth grahamweek 3). a life well lived for me wouldn’t be one without suffering or challenges that lead me to tears, but that i may recognize that all pain is temporary and that the most important thing is how i choose to react to it. another thing i’ve learned is that i really appreciate the people that choose to stick around and even more those who willingly give me hugs (i love good hugs). before coming to college, i was really nervous about making friends. i had heard many times that college is the place where you find your people and i anxiously awaited for the moment where my people would arrive knocking on my door and we would just know. that however is not how my first weeks went. after meeting what felt like hundreds of people every day and then failing to make a meaningful connection with them, i felt lost and disconnected. looking back, i think my mistake was trying to find people who were too much like me. i didn’t realize that “differences can coexist with friendship and even love” (hesburgh, directed by jerry barca; christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2), but looking at my friends now, it’s clear that we’re different in more than one way. while we disagree on some issues and have different views on others, at the end of the day, we know that we can’t let that get in the way of our friendship. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0h7mxl7lsk8 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146760 having friends that are different from me has been very enriching as it allows my view of the world to grow and has helped me grow into a more empathetic person. like boyle reminded us, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” (chapter 8: jurisdiction on tattoos on the heart, by gregory boylemoreau fye week 7). i’m glad i’ve become more open about talking to people i would’ve never talked to before and found a way to connect with them on a meaningful level. this has made me realize that an important element of a life well-lived is how you relate and connect with others. when i die, i want to be remembered as someone who was easy to talk to and who could listen. this is because the people who i love most are always open to listening to me, consoling me, and picking me up right after a hard day. i want to be that person for everyone, but especially those i love. a life well-lived isn’t just about pleasing and finding joy in others, but also within ourselves. during the first week of the moreau, we learned about having an internet sabbath to process all the information we receive every day. when i think about the life i want to live, i envision quiet periods of reflection where i can examine where my life is going at the time and really consider if i’m happy with what i’m doing. i think one of the dangers in life is becoming complacent with what we have and stop aspiring to reach for more. i haven’t been able to implement a day of complete rest yet but i sure do hope at some point in my life. maybe it won’t be an entire day as that seems a little too extreme but, an evening or night routine without electronics would greatly improve my overall wellbeing. as mentioned in the material for the week: “it’s like a retreat house that ensures we’ll have something bright and purposeful to carry back into the other six days.” (why we need to slow down our lives, by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). after all my time here at notre dame, it has become more and more clear that every little event that happens in our lives, has an impact later. at the end of the day, when i leave this world, i want to have lived a life with almost no regrets, not because i never made mistakes but because i was able to realize that every mistake led me somewhere else. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not! we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (navigating your career journey, by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). recognizing the importance of self-care is also something that my brother, whom i love very much, told me during the interview of week 5 of moreau. and that’s what i need to remind myself more often, in his words “deje tiempo para usted” (conversation with my brother, emiliano vaqueromoreau fye week 5) which translates to leave time for yourself. despite the challenges along the way, i’m enjoying being a college student at notre dame where i’m surrounded by people who care about me simply for who i am and not only because i knew https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844/download?download_frd=1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing the answer to the hard math questions. i’m looking forward to discovering what other small actions lead to new opportunities in the future. the butterfly effect is all too real and i’m excited to see where these butterflies lead me to. claudia o’sullivan integration three march 4, 2022 long live the queen eulogy: although life clearly stopped loving her when she got hit by that blimp and tragically passed away, claudia always loved life. she loved her family more than anything on earth, which includes all of her friends because she always said that family wasn’t just blood. for the majority of her life, she tried to limit her phone usage to only phone calls because she wanted to hear the voices of her loved ones, rather than see photos of them on social media. claudia grew up in miami, fl, and loved spending time outside in the water, hanging with her loved ones, and spending time with her grandparents. after highschool, claudia studied philosophy at the university of notre dame. after she graduated, she packed her bags and took her talent to the big apple. she worked at an institute at nyu studying the various challenges humanity will face in the future, and how we can solve them together as a race. these plaguing questions combined with the chaos of ny led claudia to spiral and move to wyoming to work on a farm for a couple of years. she journaled everyday while she worked on the farm with the little piglets and cows, and eventually released her entries in a book. the book was pretty bad and performed overwhelmingly poorly. that summer, she went to the lollapalooza music festival with her best friends, and she remembered that music is one of the biggest sources of joy in her life. she realized that billions of people must feel the same way, so she decided to create a non-profit to use music to help senior citizens and cancer patients who are emotionally struggling by helping them form connections with others using music. she created music festivals for senior citizens that were free of charge, with people who could assist them in transportation and moving around. doing this non-profit made her feel so connected to her grandparents, and it really brought their legacy to life. she did similar events for children battling cancer in hospitals. while planning one of these events in nashville, she met her husband. they immediately fell in love, but it was really difficult because they both traveled. however, in all of that fighting, they somehow made it work, and they got married in puerto rico two years later. they moved to miami and had 3 beautiful, sweet kids, beto, isabel, and eliza. while raising them, claudia worked less, but still made enough time weekly to make sure the non-profit was doing well. once her youngest, isabel, went to college, she and her husband traveled around the world surfing, doing mission trips, and eating delicious food. they spent their retirement years between miami, gasparilla island (a small island outside of florida), and europe until she tragically got hit by a blimp. claudia made countless, countless mistakes throughout her life, but she always cared. she will be missed. reflection: i believe that this eulogy describes a life well-lived for me because it includes love, service, and i never did anything that i didn’t believe in. i hope that, whenever i hit my lows, i don’t stop persevering and spending every day trying to follow my heart and do what’s right. as boyle said, “in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity.” (“tattoos on the heart” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven) i hope that i never forget how passionate i am about spending a great part of my life devoting myself to the elderly and people battling cancer, and i hope that i have the courage and creativity to take a risk and incorporate that pursuit with music, or something else that i love. i really hope that i do follow through and spend as little time as possible on my phone because “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) i don’t want to lose touch with myself because then i can’t love others properly. i mentioned in my eulogy how my grandparents were really important to me growing up, and how that non-profit i theoretically did helped me feel connected to them. my biggest fear in the whole world is them passing away because i don’t know how i would ever be able to cope with that. but i hope that when it happens, i take all of that sadness and turn it into motivation for bringing their legacy to life. i don’t want that heartbreak to debilitate me because i don’t want the “purpose of my life [to be] simply about overcoming suffering” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i hope that, throughout my life, i always make sure to stand up for what’s just like fr. hesburgh did. i hope to have a fraction of the courage and morality he had when “putting his moral weight behind mlk and what he was trying to do.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two) i didn’t include myself doing that in the eulogy because it’s impossible to predict what injustices i’ll witness, but i want to remind myself to always fight for the justice for all. in the qqc centered around career development, it said that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). i really believe in the power of testing the waters to figure out what’s right, and whether or not it’s experiences like working in a farm or burning out in new york, i hope that my life is full of experiences that guide me to where i belong. in the conversation i had with my best friend for the week 5 qqc, she told me that i tend to overthink for no reason. for the eulogy, i tried to describe a life where i didn’t overthink and just followed my heart. i believe that everything works out, and i never want to let myself overthink my life if i am just on my journey of finding myself. initially, i viewed writing this eulogy as a rather grim activity. but, in retrospect, i believe it was more motivating/inspiring than depressing because mortality gives life meaning. as sister aletheia said, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness, but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) the process of imagining what i want my life to look like and what values i want to carry with me has been extremely helpful. thank you so much! integration 3 liebezeit 1 moreau fye 4 march 2022 how lauren a life-well lived dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of lauren elizabeth liebezeit. i know lauren would not want us to be sad so let's celebrate and recognize the life she lived. lauren always told me that death should not be something we fear. she believed that acknowledging the inevitable allows us to live in the moment ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). you only live once, and once we begin to think about not being here one day, it encourages us to live a fulfilled life. we cannot go on in the culture of not talking about death, because it is real. by lifting the stereotypes surrounding death i believe we will all be able to live in the present and do as much as we can in this one life. lauren was one of the most caring and outgoing people i have ever met. she always sought out to be the best person for herself and others. she could make anyone laugh. she just had this infectious smile and personality that everyone loved. although she struggled a lot mentally she never gave up. she went to therapy, took mediation, and practiced self-reflection often. this i believe truly shows how strong-willed she was and how she saw the importance of working on yourself. she believed meditation and reflection were important for mental and physical health. we sometimes get caught up in our busy life and fail to slow down. i encourage you to reflect on the amazing qualities lauren saw in all of you. none of us knows ourselves all the time and some people never do. as human beings, we are constantly changing. knowing yourself is an ongoing process. the misconceptions we have of ourselves affect the way we live. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html liebezeit 2 we must look at ourselves realistically in order to get to know ourselves (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). we need to be able to acknowledge our faults as well as the things we like about ourselves. we were all lucky enough to get to know lauren and she always helped others understand themself. lauren’s life was always crazy. she was involved in sports and loved being active. i really hope she is in heaven playing a round of golf with god honestly [everyone laughs]. life can get very crazy and stressful at points, but it is important to understand your body and when it might be time to slow down ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). we live in a very fast-paced society, yet our best work comes when we take our time (in order to put our best work forward). as we see sadly first hand, life is short. take the time to slow down and appreciate the world around you. lauren’s biggest inspiration was her mother. she made lauren the woman she was and will forever be. lauren called her mom constantly and loved her very much. lauren’s mother taught her how to love herself and be a better person. they had the difficult conversations that always blossomed into motivation ("week five discernment conversation activity"moreau fye week 5). in life we must ask tough questions to explore what our life entails, something lauren was never afraid to do. once we start asking these questions, we can learn how to answer them ("three key questions" by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). we must surround ourselves with people who embrace our flaws and help us find our strengths ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). even in times of suffering we can come together to make change. i know lauren was always that person for me. she helped me when i needed her and showed me the wonderful aspects of life. i remember this one time when my boyfriend broke up with me. she was always checking in on me and https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056?module_item_id=144382 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 liebezeit 3 reminding me of how amazing i was. you are the only one who can say and understand what brings you joy, but i knew lauren understood me in that way. i know she had her own personal struggles but she was always able to be there for me. to me, living a well-lived life means being content with yourself and giving yourself the space to grow and be happy. lauren showed me this without having to say it. i watched the way she carried herself and counted on herself for her happiness ("three key questions" by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). as you all know lauren took a lot of pride in going to notre dame. she loved studying architecture and believed that college is filled with so many opportunities and guidance. i wish she was able to finish her degree but i know that she would have done amazing things because she was one of the hardest working individuals i have ever known. as our faith teaches us, one does not have to be perfect in order to live a good life ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). exam results or gpas do not determine a person's capacity for lifelong discipleship, no matter how well formed he or she may be. life is a working process and it is that that makes us strong. it is okay to not know where you will be in 10 years, but it is important to continue to do what you love and what lauren loved about you. as a woman of faith lauren always tried to see the good in people, even when it was hard. we cannot judge a person until we know everything about them. this is because one little detail about that person’s life could change your perspective (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7). the catholic faith showed lauren that we must appreciate people in all stages of life and to lean on others. this is why i believe lauren is the definition of what it means to have a relationship that brings you to a life well-lived. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39614/files/469056?module_item_id=144382 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript liebezeit 4 i hope i have made lauren proud with my words and i know she is resting peacefully in her everlasting glory. i will never forget her as long as i shall live and i truly believe heaven has gained an angel. lauren changed this world for the better and her life was well-lived. we all need each other during this difficult time. i know lauren would want us to come together. take time to yourself and process the emotions you are feeling. if we stay strong and true to ourselves, and see every person’s life as a gift, hope can prevail. lauren elizabeth liebezeit, gone but never forgotten. may she rest in paradise. capstone integration.pdf shari ho 4/28/22 capstone integration as this is the final assignment of the semester, i will be sharing my final idea of what i believe a life well-lived is and i will be separating my paper into four steps on how to achieve it: 1) understanding myself and my own goals for me 2) understanding my goals for others 3) understanding what role god plays in my life 4) actually choosing a path. like i said in my integration #3, “there are many components in living a life well-lived, and also many different perspectives of what is considered to be a life well-lived.” (“integration #3” by shari ho moreau fye week eight) with this, i will be condensing what i believe on how to live a life well-lived into four steps below. the first step to live a life well-lived is to understand myself. i need to truly know my goals, aspirations, and what i want to do with the one life i am promised, and this urgency to discovering these things about myself comes from sister alethia’s philosophy that allowed her to see her life more clearly. ruth graham, the author of an article talking about sister alethia’s philosophy, said “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) even though it sounds a bit morbid, this mindset is essential in realizing the truth of what every single person’s lives will look like. eventually, i will die, and technically, i am only assured of having one life, which is this one. this is why it is so important to think about my own desires and wishes of what i want in life, as living a life well-lived isn’t only living for others, but also living for myself. understanding myself requires self meditation almost or self reflection. pico iyer explained why this is necessary perfectly in his article, why we need to slow down our lives, by saying “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) especially in college, i feel like my life has been going at lighting speed with six classes to juggle, summer planning, job hunting, doctor appointment scheduling, and everything else on my plate all at once. with all of this, it is hard to remember the reason for doing all of these and the bigger picture, and at many times in the year, i did not see the point in doing all of these things. however, when i took a breath and really took a second to think about my life and why i am doing these 15 page essays or studying for 10 hours for an exam. looking at the bigger picture allows me to contemplate on what really matters to me and what i want to do with my life. another way to understand myself is to remember that failure is okay and that i shouldn't be discouraged if i make a mistake. father hesburgh said in a film made about him, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) living a life well-live does not mean living a perfect life because that is just unrealistic. everyone makes mistakes and living a life well-lived means learning and overcoming them and not giving up if things get hard. this is why when thinking of how i should live a life well lived, i shouldn't look past my imperfections because those are what allow me to grow and learn. the last way i can understand myself is to ask others. in week five, we did an activity that asked us to interview a close friend or smiley member and to basically ask them what they thought of us (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” by moreau moreau fye week five). this was a great way to understand myself better, as it is true that some people know us more than we know ourselves. others can pick up on our mannerisms and unintentional gestures and attitudes that we, ourselves, can’t pick up. i went to my dad for this assignment and he gave me great insight on who i am as a person and confirmed what i thought about myself. this confirmation is also helpful because it allows me to be more confident in myself and to conduct my life more confidently. the second step to live a life well-lived is to understand how i want to help others. even though it isn’t necessary to do so, i was blessed with the privilege to attend a great university, which will allow me to have the power to help others like dean marcus cole. dean marcus cole said in his article, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) dean marcus cole realizes that he is blessed with the opportunity to make a change with his education and he wants to use it for others, which is the exact reason why i included this as the second step of living a life well-lived. and with this, i need to think on exactly how i want to serve others and how i want to use my education for good. another reason why i want to help others is because i value relationships with others and i believe that the simple act of meeting new people and others meeting me will bring happiness to both parties. pope francis said in a ted talk, “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) pope francis also recognizes the importance of relationships and that we need to work together in order to create a better world. another thing to remember when finding how i want to help others is to remember what said in his article, which is “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be thesteve reifenberg voice of the voiceless,” he said at the workshop. “this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) helping others does not mean we should talk for them, but we should help them be able to talk and be heard for themselves. the third step is for me to think about how i want god to play a role in my life. i have always had doubts about god, but orienting my beliefs and values about god with how i want to live a life well lived will give it direction and more meaning. however, as i said above, i do have my doubts about god. for example, what happened to kim jihoon in week six’s course material. jihoon had many goals and aspirations for life like becoming a sushi chef and traveling the world. however, he got into a serious snowboarding accident that left him paralyzed and losing most mobility other than his arms and neck. (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six) tragedies like these happen every day to people who only did good, and i always wonder if god loves us and if he existed, how could he let this happen. another example is jacob walsh’s story, where he grew up as both gay and catholic. he said in his article, “it convinced me that the church’s teachings around marriage and sexuality were true. but i didn’t know how they could be true for me.” (“growing up gay and catholic ” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten) why does the church preach such inhumane teachings when they claim that god loves everyone. things like these make me confused about my religion. however, over the years, i realized that even though i am hesitant about god himself, i do strongly believe in his moral teachings, and if i use this to direct how i want to live my life will help me achieve a life well lived. the last step is to actually choose what life i want to live. first, when finding all the possible career/life paths, it is important not to be in an echo chamber. paul blaschko described the echo chamber as, “echo chamber: a social structure for which relevant voices have been actively discredited”. (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber ” by paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) what i mean when i use the term echo chamber is that i shouldn’t be only exposed to one area of career paths. i should do the research and ask my family members about what they do for a living and learn about as many career/life paths i can take. in doing this, it shows me all of the options and i can choose which one best fits my goals and desires for myself and for others. luckily, the career center gave us tips on how to find the best career while considering all aspects. dr. donald super created a theory about career decision making, and with this, he said, “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) i need to consider my values, interests, personality, and skills to choose the best career path. in my mission statement, i stated that “for now until the day i die, i will live my life for my family, my friends, my neighbors, and myself.” (“week 13 writing a personal mission statement” by shari ho moreau fye week thirteen) these four steps will help me accomplish this and help me live by my mission statement. integration three my idea of a well-lived life as i began to think about how i would want to be remembered, all that came to my mind was family and friends– all of my loved ones. i am a hard-working person and find value in my education and setting myself up for a good future career, but i believe those aspects of my life are strictly temporary in the sense that they cannot continue to benefit me after my time on earth. when i think about a eulogy i think about defining words, the words of greatest meaning–mother, father, sister, brother, wife, husband, friend. these words are based upon relationships, unlike words such as boss, coworker, employee. although work related terms do have value as well, i would like to be defined by my relationships full of love and care. similarly, being remembered for compassion, sincerity, kindness, and patience are much more admirable than to be remembered as studious, career-oriented, focused, and prepared. in conclusion, i believe work and family to be generally separate components of one’s life and i would want my life to be primarily defined by the familial component. i am at my happiest when i am surrounded by other people, specifically those that i care for and that care for me. in week one, i wrote about technology and work dominating people’s lives to the point of needing breaks and time to slow down. one such quote that reflected the busyness of life was, “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fys week one). i often feel as if i should always be doing something of value, but at this point in my life i interchange value with schoolwork or studying. i need to keep reminding myself that there is value in time for self-care or to develop and maintain relationships with friends and family. value does not only need to be defined by schoolwork, but must also be defined by establishing relationships, because at the end of our lives our focus will be on our loved ones, not on our past education and careers. education and hard work must not be discredited, because setting oneself up for a successful future career will ultimately benefit one’s relationships by removing stressors such as finances; but this simply shows that the purpose found in careers is not to merely keep moving up until one is at the top but instead to work hard to be able to increase their quality of life and that of their loved ones. there is such a strong focus in society on the importance of careers and setting up a work related future for yourself. while this is extremely important and necessary, i believe it is often forgotten that one’s career is not what should be the main component defining their lives. in week two, i watched the video about father hesburgh’s life (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144072 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144072 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144076 christine o'malley moreau fye week two). while his career seemed to be a central part of the video, it was not really his career being focused on but the relationships he developed throughout his career. when i reflect upon the video now, i do not remember his job titles or academic accomplishments, but i can remember the specific examples of love he showed to all he was surrounded by–from political leaders to simple young notre dame students. he is not remembered merely for being the president of notre dame for decades, but instead for being a man of love that bettered the lives of so many around him. when i pass away, i too want to be remembered for how i affected the lives of others. ideally, i would use my future career to benefit others, like father hesburgh, and use it as a platform to express love and care for others. in week three, i read an article about being reminded daily of imminent death. the article sounded morbid at first, but i later realized that the controversial practice could have clear benefits regarding appreciating life: “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, new york times moreau fye week three). i think there is value in being reminded that life is temporary, because it helps remind people to reevaluate their lives and to make sure they are joyful and content with what they have done and the trajectory they are on. i believe the practice would enable me to live my most well lived life, since i would not be focused on temporary issues or pleasures, but instead be focused on long term happiness and joy. the areas of less importance in my life could be recognized and set aside, leaving room for areas of greater importance–such as family and relationships. now is a time in my life that is extremely focused on career discernment and being future oriented, as proven by week four discussion, but often this acts as a distraction that takes away focus from my relationships. i have noticed myself pushing phone calls and communication with friends and family off to the side, so i can maximize my time to work and prepare for what is to come in future weeks. although it is good to be focused on school, i must remind myself that time is limited and at the end of my life those relationships i am pushing aside will be the most important aspect of my life–what defines me, what brings me joy, the people i want to be by my side in the end. in week seven, i watched a video focused on the words of pope francis, who said “people’s paths are riddled with suffering as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people” (“his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript everyone | ted talk” by ted conferences moreau fye week seven). i completely agree with his statement, because it is easy to be led astray by temporal desires and leave others behind when it happens. money cannot be brought with us to the grave, the one thing it can provide after death is security for other people important to us, including specific foundations, friends, and family. if i let my relationships suffer while on the path to gain money and workplace success there will be no ultimate purpose for the money in the first place. it could bring me short term happiness during the course of my life, but when i am on my deathbed there will be no happiness money can provide me. like pope francis said, i believe suffering can be diminished when one refocuses their life and goals to be related to relationships rather than on temporal goods. all in all, when i think about my eulogy i think about the impact i have made on those around me, specifically my loved ones. i hope to be defined by my relationships with others, remembered as a joyful and caring person, and to be surrounded by all the people whose lives i have touched. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration a selfless life is a life well lived entered our lives march 21, 2003. the first born child of matt and caci liebentritt. he was happy, caring, supportive, persistent, and loving. he was a husband, father, family man, football player, doctor. he touched so many lives simply with his presence. it wasn’t that he was showy or flaunting, but it was the little things that he did every single day that led him to have such an impact on everyone around him. whenever you needed anything, you knew that barret would be there for you. he would sacrifice so much just to make his friends, family, wife and especially his children happy. from a young age, he always had big aspirations. his dream was to become a football player, and took that dream all the way from peewee skyhawk football to skutt to notre dame. he took pride in where he was from. he loved nebraska, he loved st. patrick’s and he loved skutt. he moved on to notre dame where he learned so much about life. while there, he used technology to keep in touch with his friends and family. he enjoyed social media, but he realized the negative effects if he used it too much. as pico iyer says, “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer fye moreau week 1). he found that the best use was to talk with friends and family when away, but when with he people, he tried to eliminate technology. he always made sure to enjoy the moment. in a world where it would be easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle, he always found a way to slow down. he found a way to be thankful for all that he had and to take in the beauty of his situation in the world. he had aspirations to help others, and this led him to find happiness through making his friends, family, and strangers’ lives better. he saw how others like dr. rene bermea used their profession to impact others’ lives as she said, “i realized how important it was for us to have researchers who contribute to the knowledge base so that cases like roslyn can live.” (“domer dozen” by dr. rene bermea fye moreau week 2) he saw first hand how research helped save his aunt’s life and help reintroduce her back into society following her stroke, and he wanted to do something similar for the world. his profession as a doctor fit him perfectly. he was able to help so many people, and he found his work very fulfilling. he did have questions in his life. he wondered why god would allow suffering, and why he was blessed to be born to such a good situation. however, he realized that everything happened for a purpose, that most things were out of his control and thus the best option was to make the most of his situation. he had a strong belief that everything happens for a reason, and this helped him get through the obstacles in his life. he believed in the quote, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development fye moreau week 4). he looked at the world around him and saw that everyone seemed to have a different view on what was considered a life well lived. he recognized that some people’s view of a life well lived ultimately were unsustainable. he found that the only way to sustainable happiness was to find joy in other people's joys. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ he took more joy in others’ success than in his own. as marianne moore said, “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy.” (three key questions-quote by marianne moore fye moreau week 3). he found satisfaction in his accomplishments and work, but he took joy seeing his friends, family, and children succeed. he was also good at listening to advice. he trusted others to guide him and help him on his path. he especially followed the advice of his father. he aspired to be like him. they were alike in many ways, and he didn’t hesitate to ask for his help. they both shared the same love for their family and friends, and made the difficult choices even when it might make some people upset at the time. his life was by no means perfect. he faced his fair share of obstacles. he struggled through middle school, and had periods of anxiety throughout his life. he sometimes found himself stuck in his own head trying to figure out what caused him to be where he’s at, but he found that it was important to not dwell on the past. as tasha eurich says, “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich fye moreau week 6). while he would reflect on the “why” to learn from the past, he focused on the “what” in order to make the best decisions based on his situation regardless of how he came to this point. he always remembered that god has a plan, and everything happens for a purpose. he chose to, “view every disappointment and setback as a lesson.” (“discernment activity” fye moreau week 5). he found that it wasn’t the obstacles we faced that define us, but what defines us is our reactions. his relationships were obviously important throughout his life. he was especially focused on his long term friendships and family relationships. he kept a smaller circle of friends, but he put everything into those relationships. he knew he couldn’t get through life alone. as pope francis said, “i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis fye moreau week 7). these relationships helped get him through anything in life. he relied on others to help him when he needed it, and more than anything you could always count on him to do the same for you. he was the best friend someone could have, the best husband to his wife, and the best father to his kids. he is the perfect example of how living a selfless life is a life well lived. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript mfye integration 1 lonergan 1 professor helm moreau first year experience 15 october 2021 there’s only room to grow i believe that i grow by being vulnerable. while being vulnerable is scary and intimidating, it’s important in order to truly be yourself and create comfortability in the world around you. as a first-year, i was so frightened about finding my place on campus. i was worried that i wouldn’t make friends, or that i’d feel alone in a place so vast and new. however, in openly being myself and lowering any pressures or expectations i had walking onto campus, i’ve been the most free and accepting of who i am than i ever have before. being vulnerable doesn’t just equate to explicitly stating that you are going to be accepting of yourself, but instead acting on that notion. personally, i was vulnerable in regards to friendships on campus. my first couple of weeks at school i texted a couple of girls that i had either met during welcome weekend, my classes, or mutual friends, and invited them to dinner or to simply hang out. all of the people currently in my friend group are people that i was originally vulnerable with because i put myself out there and asked them to hang out. while this might appear as a simple action, it’s one that requires a lot of vulnerability. with putting yourself out there comes the risk of rejection, which is the most painstaking part of life. although, as soon as you accept yourself, you are able to live vulnerably without the fear that someone else can alter your perception of who you are inside. for example, dr. brené brown explains, “there was only one variable that separated the people who had a strong sense of love and belonging, and really struggle for it, and that was that the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they are worthy of love and lonergan 2 belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). the biggest obstacle between a person and their goal is themselves, which is emphasized here. in general, i think that everyone just wants to be loved and less-alone; however, we tend to desire those feelings while subconsciously hiding from ourselves. david brooks emphasized this point by describing that in order to come to terms with the most genuine and vulnerable version of yourself, “you go into yourself, you find the sin which you’ve committed over and again through your life, your signature sin, out of which the others emerge, and you fight that sin and you wrestle with that sin, and out of that wrestling, that suffering, then a depth of character is constructed” ("should you live for your résumé or your eulogy?" by david brooks moreau fye week two). in acting certain ways to gain people’s approval, or placing barriers between ourselves and the world, we’re only putting ourselves at a disservice. in being vulnerable within, we are all able to grow into our best selves because we are able to push ourselves amidst the discomfort. i believe that i am searching for a place. with our week four lesson on life giving relationships, i realized how important it is to surround yourself with people that make you feel comfortable. especially living independently for the first time in my entire life, i’ve realized that home is not a place, but instead the people you surround yourself with. while i used to hear that sentence frequentlyand i always found it to be clichéi’ve recently realized the truth in it. i haven’t been homesick once, but i’ve missed my parents and my little sister more than ever. the other day when i was walking around the lake talking to my parents, it struck me that while i miss my bed, my own room, and my shower, i don’t necessarily miss my home. i miss my mom’s hugs, my dad’s jokes, and my sister’s presence. as we discussed in our week six discussion, your environment shapes you to be the person you end up becoming. in drawing on https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&feature=youtu.be https://youtu.be/mllwteapqim lonergan 3 george ella lyon’s poem “where i’m from”, she mentions, “i'm from the know-it-alls/and the pass-it-ons,/from perk up! and pipe down!” ("where i'm from" by george ella lyon moreau fye week six). here the poet emphasizes that relationships, people, and things are where one is fromnot a time or place. in distinguishing what truly shapes an individual, it’s important to note the impact of relationships on ourselves. with that in mind, the importance of relationships and the complexity of forging new ones during this period of my life is ever present. a comment from one source stated, “the best kind of friendships are the ones where you leave with a smile on your face, knowing you’re both growing to be better people and that you’re helping each other get there” ("5 signs you're in a toxic friendship" by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week four). this sentence encapsulates the importance and value of relationships. i miss my family because they pushed me to be the best version of myself, and they loved me wholeheartedly. as i make new friends on campus, i think that i hope to find people who instill the same energy in me. i believe that i am made to help others. knowledge is power, and that point is emphasized here on campus. notre dame’s mission is to not just create smart people, but good people. to me, there’s no point in learning if you’re not going to implement your knowledge into the world. with thousands of students coming to campus this yearall with different experiences, backgrounds, and storiesi think that it’s crucial to share our stories with each other. especially in noting our lesson on pursuing truth amidst implicit biases, the idea that educating one another is crucial to the success of accomplishing equality was noted. one point that especially stook out to me was that “white applicants get about 50 percent more callbacks than black applicants with the same resumes; college professors are 26 percent more likely to respond to a student’s email when it is signed by brad rather than lamar; and physicians recommend less pain medication for http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ lonergan 4 black patients than white patients with the same injury” ("how to destroy truth" by david brooks moreau fye week seven ). this was something that i was completely unaware of; however, in acknowledging racial bias and educating not only ourselves, but each other, we can then progress as a society. additionally, in week 5’s lesson, carla harris touched on the value in education in stating that, “the way to amplify your life is to use who you are, what you know, and who you know to help others, for that will take your life from success to significance” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week five). my mom has always said, “take something you like and take something you’re good at and make it your job”, which has a similar connotation to harris’. with these points in mind, this semester i’ve attempted to use my love and passion for writing to help my community. i began writing for the scholastic in order to use my knowledge to educate others about what’s happening on our campus so that people are equipped to be in touch with their environment. while it might appear as a minor service to the community, the impact is still important to note because each minor action has a reaction. i know that i’m made to help others, and this is one stepping stone to accomplishing that goal on campus. additionally, on notre dame’s campus, i feel such a stronger connection to god. with the university highlighting the importance of faith, i’ve begun to realize how my faith is incorporated into all aspects of my life. as mentioned in week three, “everything is sacrament, everything speaks of god, nothing is ordinary, no one is ordinary, god can come through every experience, every neighbor is the face of god, every joy and sorrow can become a prayer” ("faith brings light to a dark world" by professor david fagerberg moreau fye week three). everything we do, everything we see, and everything we are is a piece of god. faith is the foundation of the earth, and when you realize its presence, your perspective of the world can change, and people can become more equipped in helping each other. my goal for https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau lonergan 5 myself the next half of this semester and onwards is to use my faith to help guide me towards assisting others. in general, i know that i’m made to help others, and i think that i can do that by unifying the ideas of communicating with my peers to understand their stories, utilizing my own education and experiences to benefit the world around me, and staying in touch with my faith so that i can make an impact. eulogy of a past self if i asked first-semester, freshman-year nicole what three words she would use to describe herself, i would imagine that she would say, “stressed, lost, and confused.” she was not unhappy; she truly loved studying at notre dame. however, she did not yet know herself and was overwhelmed by the plethora of tasks, people, and opportunities in the new environment that was her home. she tried to assimilate into groups that did not necessarily fit her persona and felt sensations of loneliness and cluelessness to a degree she had never before experienced. then, suddenly—over winter break, in fact—the first-semester character of nicole quickly died. in her wake followed a student whose personality truly embodied the true personification of nicole’s genuine personality. this second-semester persona (let us refer to her as the “new nicole”, and her past self as “past nicole”) that emerged represented a confident, exciting, and authentic version of past nicole, who was simply a shell that kept her genuine personality a secret out of fear of being called weird and treated as such. new nicole chose to listen to fr. boyle’s command to “close both eyes; see with the other one, understanding his explanation that as a result, “we are no longer saddled by the burden of our… constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week eight). by closing her eyes to her own judgement of herself and the negative opinions of other individuals toward her, new nicole understood what it meant to feel welcomed home, very quickly making close friends who appreciated her for her genuine character, and not a façade. she began to have faith in herself and understood that the only way for her to feel welcome in her new home—notre dame—was for her to accept and welcome her current self, and to explore her interests in order to truly understand herself and make herself feel welcome at home. past nicole failed an innumerable number of times during her first semester, whether in completing an assignment, achieving a strong exam score, or in getting enough sleep. in addition to that, she reacted very poorly to mistakes. she constantly became angered by her missteps and did not approach her issues with gentleness and patience. instead, she was constantly irritated by and disappointed in herself. however, understanding that this approach did not help her make permanent or quick progress, she left the earth, passing on her wisdom to new nicole, who remembers to give herself grace for her mistakes. she now realizes, “it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by ccd – moreau fye week four). she no longer expects every struggle she has to be fully resolved and every mistake she makes to be singular and isolated. she understands that progress takes time, effort, and above all, patience. she has become much kinder to herself and has faith that she can truly improve if she decides to. she supports and encourages herself in a way that, unfortunately, past nicole never could. in addition, new nicole is willing to accept help from other people, while past nicole resisted outside aid and eventually faded away as a result of her stubbornness. new nicole, in fact, received guidance from her mother, who told her, “you need to learn to accept help from other people, because we all rely on each other for help. the ability to accept help is not a manifestation of weakness, but a manifestation of strength” (quote by mom – moreau fye week five). new nicole understands that she, too, will flounder and drown in her own struggles if she does not create a support system that she can rely on when she needs a hand to pull her out of the tumultuous waters into which life sometimes throws us. when new nicole was staying awake until 2 am every night, fighting sleep in order to finish her calculus b homework, she realized that she was truly struggling with her adhd and did not have the coping mechanisms she needed. instead of trying to persevere by herself, as past nicole would have, she began to research different methods of combatting executive function disorder, and even began working with an adhd life coach. not only did new nicole find guidance and support in other people, but she began to explore her faith in god. past nicole, while noticing the announcements on her hall’s whiteboard that stated the times that mcglinn masses would be occurring, chose not to pray—or even meditate—because of her fear of analyzing her concerns and emotions. she constantly kept herself occupied with work and took no time to relax or re-energize herself. thus, she suffered, burnt out, and her flame fizzled out. through her moreau course, in fact, new nicole discovered the power of meditation in relaxing her and allowing her to organize her thoughts and emotions. her moreau instructor allowed the class to meditate for five minutes, and new nicole realized that just five minutes allowed her to cleanse her mind of many stresses and concerns. as an advocate of meditation states, “don’t try to force meditation, and don’t make it complicated. simplify it” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). understanding that meditation and prayer can take just five minutes, an amount of time that everybody can allocate to it, helped new nicole make meditation and prayer a part of her daily routine. the self-reflection and the quietness of the practice has helped her sift through complex issues and various concerns. one such issue that new nicole had to solve was the discernment of her major. past nicole left her with this task, because she herself avoided considering it at all costs. as a result, new nicole was quite anxious about the major she should choose, since she knew the one that past nicole had selected had been quite overwhelming for her. new nicole decided to approach the issue in a structured way, asking advice from her parents, friends, and other people she trusted. she did significant amounts of research and wrote notes about which majors seemed to interest her the most, and which ones would be conducive to her having an improved chance of being accepted to medical school. over time, she realized that “there is no point where you can say, ‘the issue of my calling is settled’” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). once new nicole understood this, she decided to stay with the major that past nicole had chosen. she realized that she would not suffer and struggle the way past nicole had, because past nicole did not have the tools and skills that new nicole had gained as a result of past nicole’s experiences. so far, new nicole has been much more successful, and while she also still makes mistakes, she is much more productive and effective in the methods she uses to improve or resolve those slip-ups. finally, new nicole realized that she needed to have trust in herself. if she were to continuously doubt herself the way that past nicole did, she would accelerate her own failure and eventual death of her persona! new nicole comprehended that her gut and her mind needed to collaborate and trust each other. only then, “once they trusted each other,” would they be “able to do tremendous work” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). new nicole began to cooperate with her gut, rather than resisting it, and as a result, she began to see more and more success! this success increased her confidence and her faith in herself, and new nicole believes that this will progress will only continue. new nicole knows that if she continues to trust herself, she can reach the goals she sets for herself, even if they are lofty and require quite a large amount of work to achieve. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). as the author of this eulogy of past nicole, looking at the canvas of her life, i can see the pitfalls that led to her death and to her reincarnation, so to speak, as new nicole. it is also curious to see that past nicole struggled to see the full picture and focused on the tree rather than the forest. she would isolate her mistakes and fixate on them, instead of realizing that the error was a fallen tree in an otherwise beautiful forest full of growth and progress. new nicole, it seems, is improving past nicole’s issues with fixation and details. she could also use some progress in that area, but she realizes that as long as she is learning from her errors and improving, she is progressing toward success. annie zhao growing myself to grow my community the word “mission” is a big and vague word. on the one hand, i have a personal mission, a duty to myself out of my own goals i set for the person i want to be. on the other hand, i have a duty to my peers and my community to act selflessly and push for a better world. there are things i want to accomplish professionally while i’m here, and there are ways i hope to grow as a person as well. on a personal level, i realized last semester that i’ve been trying to rush through life and getting upset by the day-to-day annoyances. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1) i need to start thinking long-term, rather than getting crazy about tiny, short-term events and their consequences. i need to stop looking at the different parts of my life as separate entities and realize that they are all interconnected and come together as one, my life. i plan on taking more study breaks to spend more time with my friends. i’m going to try to pick up some smarter homework habits so that working on my academics does not occupy too much of my time, for i will die one day, and i want to live every day to the fullest. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she stated. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3) when i think about my life, i often dream about the future, what my life will look like, the experiences i hope to someday have. for me, this battle between living in the moment and living for the future has always shaped my decisions. on the one hand, i know that tomorrow is not promised, and i surely do not want to spend my last few hours doing homework. on the other hand, i know that my chances of dying tomorrow are slim, and my future self will regret not working hard in college if i do not do my homework. in college specifically, i find that a worklife balance is especially key. if one outbalances the other, i find that sometimes both crumble together, or the achievements of one do not outweigh the regret of the other. my personal mission in college is to push myself to be better, but also take a step back to live in the moment. i am on a quest to find myself more. this is the first time i’m living alone, and i think that this is the best opportunity to not only find who i am but also shape myself into who i want to be. but it’s hard to do that when there’s so much going on at once. “in other words, we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started. ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6) i often find myself in a dilemma of analyzing my every move or just moving through the motions. part of me feels like if i do not analyze myself, i will not know myself very well, and every day will turn into a blur, and my actions are meaningless. on the other hand, if i do not analyze, i can just feel what i feel without turning that feeling into anything more than it is. i think that a life worth lived is a combination of the what’s and the why’s. i do not want to live in ignorance of my actions, but i also do not want to overthink everything and get anxious. my mission for myself is to find the balance. “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices.” (navigating your career journey – moreau fye week 4) i chose my major because i have always been good at math. but growing up in an immigrant family, i also know i chose computer science because there would be job stability, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ and i could make a decent salary. i also feel like coding is one of those skills that are applicable anywhere, so even if i do miraculously find my passions, i can always find a job dealing with that passion because of the skills i have learned. and with this skill, i can truly work for anything i value. so my mission is not to find what major i should be, but to find what i truly value and want to fight for. before i came to college, i had a great support system of friends, families, and teachers, so having to leave them was extremely difficult. but i knew that i could build a new support system here. “instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” (teaching accompaniment by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9) there is inevitably a lot of pain and suffering we go through to be alive, but my life is so much better when i have people by my side. although i have made a couple of really good friends, i hope to make more, especially those who can relate with me, like people of similar backgrounds or interests. in my mission to be happier, i need friends around me here. on the other hand, my mission here goes far beyond just me and who i am. i am here on this earth as a community member who has a responsibility beyond those around me. : "let us help each other, all together, to remember that the 'other' is not a statistic, or a number” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). we hear so many statistics about other people, like how many people in a state are illiterate, how accessible food is to students. but because we may not be included in this statistic, we do not feel the immediate reality of it. but when you meet somebody in this category, everything feels a bit more tangible. you’re more empathetic. you remember that these percentages represent human beings. i think the relationships of a life well-lived obviously include your immediate circle of friends and family, but for a well-lived life, i think that i must also build relationships with strangers that i’ll never meet. my mission is to both get engaged and engage others in classes and clubs. at this school, it can be hard to accomplish some goals because of the political divide. but i remind myself that father hesburgh stood the challenge and fought for what he believed in. “he did a lot of things people did not think was priestly. he was entrepreneurial.” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2). just because things do not follow what has always been done does not make them incorrect. just like father hesburgh has shown, they can be simply entrepreneurial and improve the school. i think when people say that the university is changing too much, they should keep in mind what hesburgh would have wanted. but in my quest to work for change, as it should be for anyone, i must find what i value. and that’s the hard work. “this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental. one cannot understand how racism functions in the u.s. today if one ignores group power relations.” (“why it's so hard for white people to talk about racism” by dr. robin diangelo – moreau fye week 10) embracing humanity to me means treating everybody like a human and understanding that we are equal. and that’s why it’s important to diversify who i surround myself with, for each person will contribute to my values and my actions. when there is a diverse crowd influencing me, i can assure that my decisions are considering many groups of people. in high school, i think i grew up in an echo chamber, and though i still hold many of the beliefs i did then, listening to people on the opposite side has definitely reshaped my perspective on policies and ideologies. “we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to.” (how to avoid an echo chamber by paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11) personally, i disagree with a lot of political beliefs and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd practices that both people here and the university call for, but i am actively trying to keep that from coming between me and others. their ideas will either change my opinion for the better or make my passion stronger. through speaking to other people, i realized what i stood for that maybe i didn’t even know about. “annie always had a passion for the inequality in education and opportunities based on race and class, even if she didn’t know it at first” (conversation with friend, february 20th, 2022, week 5) sometimes the unconscious values one holds are the strongest. i need to befriend people with whom i can have these important discussions because they can help me find out what i really care about. and this takes courage. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states.” ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something." by g. marcus cole – moreau fye week 12) the biggest act of courage one can have is to fight for what one believes in, to even have such a strong motivation that it goes against social norms. so many human rights are under threat all the time, but many of them society cannot even fully recognize. to bring these issues to light, we must have the courage to discover them in the first place. to grow in my courage to act, i think i first need to internally develop the courage to stand for what i believe in. i need to do my research, strengthen my values, and my passion for these values will override the fear of the judgement and ridicule i might face. with this courage, that is when acting is the sole choice for me. with this in mind, i plan on rejoining diversity council, a club i was in last semester but drifted out of. they helped build my passion through reading articles and discussing with fellow-minded students about the issues here at notre dame that plagued us. in addition to joining more clubs, i want to make more friends who come from different backgrounds. “over the course of the semester, i have not necessarily changed my root beliefs, but i have developed a greater perspective on how those beliefs should take place in my life.” (annie zhao week 13) when i was a kid, i was mainly friends with people of the same race as me, but once i got to high school, most of my friends were white or black. so when i came to college and befriended many hispanic and latinx people, there was a bit of a culture shock for me, in the best way possible. now, i’m trying to learn portuguese and study more about their cultures since i now know i know virtually nothing about them. in addition, i’ve had a hard time finding friends who were asian, to my surprise, so next semester i plan on participating in asian allure and seoul’d out. i thought that in high school, i understood diversity because my friends were more diverse than before, but now i realize that there is so much more to diversity than just race. a person from mexico has different experiences i can learn from compared to a person from brazil. with a new drive to understand diversity in the lens of ethnicity and nationality rather than just the base line of race, especially through befriending international students, i find that i am growing in wisdom about the world outside america, not just wisdom about diversity in america. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ moreau fye capstone integration fye 29 april 2022 moreau fye semester two capstone integration how do i pursue a life well-lived? as a born and raised catholic, i value living a just and moral life. it is important to me to orient my goals towards bringing about good for others. for it is not only a goal of mine to spend eternity with our father in heaven, but i want to arrive at the gates of heaven knowing that i brought many others with me. essentially, that in itself is my mission. i also value putting both my faith in jesus and my relationships with others before myself. making an intentional effort to foster authentic and genuine relationships is something i deeply care about. i believe that god puts certain people into my life for a reason and it is my job to listen and engage with them so i may enrich myself with their wisdom. to me, living a life well-lived means focusing on bettering myself each and every day, so that i am personally in a spot where i am capable of changing someone’s world (personal mission statement moreau fye week thirteen). this year i learned how difficult it can be to focus on bettering myself if i don’t set aside time for self-reflection. focusing on myself, and ensuring that i am in a place where i can best help others, is a huge component of my mission statement. this past semester, after reading the article by pico iyer during the first week of moreau, i started utilizing the “do not disturb” feature on my phone. the article discussed research in the field of “interruption science” and mentioned that it can take 25 minutes to recover from just a single phone call (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i became aware of how often i was picking up my phone as notifications lit up my screen during the day and realized that the time i was aimlessly spending on my phone after getting distracted by a notification was eating away at the time i could have been spending on self-reflection and care. the “do not disturb” feature has allowed me to get things done more efficiently, without distractions, and i’ve found that i have more time to focus on myself. during the second week of moreau, i learned about the mission of fr. ted hesburgh. i was inspired by hesburgh’s ingenious ways of bringing people with opposing views together in the same room. he understood how to engage the larger culture and how to transform and articulate the culture's strengths and weaknesses. fr. ted was entirely committed to the country, his faith, and to what was right (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). it is important to me to represent catholicism well– something that hesburgh surely accomplished. his class and ability to talk across differences in an effort to create trust and a mutual understanding is a skill that i want to foster throughout my remaining time at notre dame and thereafter. to live in such a way demonstrates that one truly understands the bigger picture of life. i went into freshman year undecided about my major. during the third week of moreau, we reflected upon what questions guide a life well-lived. “does anybody need me to do it?” was one of three key questions posed by fr. michael himes (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). fundamentals of finance, with carl ackermann, was a course i took this semester that greatly influenced my decision to declare finance as my major. i love giving to others because of the rewarding feeling it brings me. there are a lot of really successful individuals in the finance industry who don’t value giving back all that greatly. i’ve realized that there are people out in the world that need me to work hard so that i can help them financially. god made each of us with a unique purpose, and i believe he intended for me to have a positive experience with ackermann, so that i would be inspired to go do great things in the finance world. during the fourth week, i was reminded that, contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of my life (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i am passionate about many things and have been made aware that, despite my major, i can accomplish whatever i set myself up for. i interviewed my dad during the fifth week of moreau for the discernment activity. i chose to interview my dad because he is someone whose advice i value greatly. he has a special ability to deliver advice to me in an honest, yet loving manner. when asked what i most value and desire in life, he responded, “respect, because you have grown up in a fairly competitive household, with an overachieving older brother that unfairly placed an inordinate amount of pressure on you to achieve similar success. those challenges led you to value both the respect of others and respect for yourself (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five).” this was right on, as respect from others is a value rooted deeply in the way i choose to live. “so i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others, or what we can do already, instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six).” this quote was from the sixth week of moreau when we discussed personal obstacles to living a life well-lived and how to respond. last semester in moreau, i took a test that evaluated my strengths and my responses indicated gratitude as my top ranked strength. i think it is so important to live life with a “glass half full” perspective. it is so much easier to recognize our blessings this way. it is not possible to live a life well-lived if our focus is only on what we are living without. during the seventh week of moreau, we discussed relationships of a life well-lived. in “why the only future worth building includes everyone,” pope francis talked about hope. he pointed out that hope begins with just one person. pope francis also touched on tenderness and how it starts from the heart and reaches the eyes (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” from his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). in my mission statement, i expressed how i value fostering genuine and authentic relationships. i think tenderness is really important when forming these types of bonds. the eighth week of moreau involved an activity in which i wrote my own eulogy. through this assignment, i defined a life well-lived. to live a life well-lived is to live assiduously– to intend on showing great care and perseverance in every one of my actions (integration three moreau fye week eight). engaging with accompaniment in a suffering world, which we touched on during week nine, also relates to my mission. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). true acts of generosity are done without expecting anything in return. others will be able to see my mission in action when they can tell that i am acting with generosity. “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac: a guide to student life moreau fye week ten).” the world would be so boring if everyone was the same. the diversity at notre dame is what collectively makes the university so talented. there is a wide range of talents across the various majors and when students across the board come together and collaborate, the different perspectives and knowledge backgrounds allow for creative ideas to emerge. as stated in my mission statement, i value authentic encounters with my peers here at notre dame and truly believe god put us at the same place so we can work together to accomplish something magical. at notre dame, i am surrounded by opportunities to grow in wisdom. in order to grow in wisdom, i think it is extremely important to listen with open ears. each of us lives a life that is unique only to us. we experience things that others do not. in order to grow in wisdom and understanding, it is important that we share these experiences with others. i think it is important to note that even if we disagree with someone, it does not mean we can’t learn something from them (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). one specific mission i want to contribute to while here at notre dame is being a voice for the unborn. i want to speak out for the unborn as loud as dean g. marcus cole has spoken out against racial injustice (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” moreau fye week twelve). i hold a special place in my heart for the victims of abortion and have the power to do something. if i can save just one child’s life, then i have fulfilled my earthly mission to change just one person’s world. over the course of my remaining three years as a student at notre dame, i hope to continue to encounter people who help me strengthen and live out my mission. i am so blessed to be at a university that is so rich in opportunity. moreau capstone integration 1 moreau capstone integration 4/15/22 preparing to live by my mission my mission, as a blanket statement, must be to serve others. although my intended career path is still under development, i know i have an obligation to focus my attention and efforts outside of my own desires going forward. my parents raised me to emulate their dedication and compassion for others, and i feel called to incorporate those virtues into my career. while much of my thinking about future careers is focused on professions in the financial world, i’ve begun to think more critically about how i can best serve my future community through business since starting the second semester moreau curriculum. my journey over the rest of my years in college will be in pursuit of these concrete ways that i can go forth and do good in the world. “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity” (week 1). this sentiment resonates with me especially now, since i want to progress through my education toward a career without stagnating. much of my early experience in college was about finding my feet, not necessarily having a set direction. however, after spending two influential semesters on campus, there are two different quotes that i’ve come across from moreau that i believe can guide me through the rest of college and beyond. father theodore hesburgh once said, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up” (week 2). in the context of a well-lived life, there is a great deal of truth in this statement. if a person wants to see real change in the world, destroying the problem simply isn’t enough (i.e. “burning something down”). instead, the focus must be on creating something truly influential and beneficial to help other people. the second quote states that “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes 2 from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (week 3). i know i can find joy in serving others, and i intend to build a foundation in college that sets me on that path. these quotes are representative of my overall mindset as i seek to serve in my future at notre dame and in my future career, but there are some important qualifiers that i must mention before explaining the concrete ways that i can implement philanthropy into my life. first of all, i know that this journey is not one that i’ll be taking alone. the impact that others can have on my personal philosophy is enormous, especially at notre dame where professors and alumni “have opted into speaking with students like me about discerning a life well-lived.” (week 5). outside of these resources, though, the most important people in my discernment are still likely my parents. i can always turn to them for answers or advice, and i know they will always push me to be a better, more service-oriented person. the opinions of my friends can have a huge impact on my beliefs as well. especially from the guys living in my dorm, i’ve gained a lot of wisdom from listening to others and learning from their actions. pope francis once said, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (week 7). meaningful friendships and relationships, as i’ve often found, are what having a life well lived is all about. because they are so important, i’ve always done my best to surround myself with people who will motivate me to go into the world and do good. in terms of how i can functionally serve through my career in the business world, i’ve done a great deal of thinking recently about how that would look. after being asked “what does the world need you to be?” in moreau this semester, i researched how social responsibility can be effectively worked into a career in finance (week 4). to begin, socially responsible companies can be a powerful means for good, and businesses that are leveraged for service by utilizing a 3 double bottom line (dbl) are especially effective in that regard. beyond the conventional measures of financial performance, these companies also evaluate performance in terms of positive social impact. this idea that a company “doing good” can also be the means by which the company “does well” is admirable. my purpose can be to help scale these honorable businesses. by helping them improve their financial position, i can make positive impact sustainable and more widespread. my intro to finance professor, dr. carl ackermann, represents another way i can serve. he told our class that when he first came to south bend, he sought out local charities and offered his financial services on a pro bono basis. the organizations were thrilled to have his help, and they are in much better financial shape today as a result. this example illustrates how valuable and highly coveted the skills of good and honest financial professionals truly are, and i can utilize the same strategy to make a difference for charitable organizations. by stepping up to offer my skills and expertise free of charge, i can inspire communities of people and enable them to create meaningful change. i think the important thing for me in this context will be patience. if i’m too eager to go out and create this change, i could fall into the trap of seeing my early career as a failure if i don’t get the results that i desire. unfortunately, studies show that people who are too engulfed in self-reflection are “more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (week 6). i must remind myself that my career will develop slowly and that i should not get caught up in the moment. eventually, through direct action within or outside of my main job, there are also some additional impacts that i would like to have. for example, i think there are very vulnerable young people in our society, who now more than ever with rising costs of living and increasing crime 4 across the country, are in danger of being set down dark paths. i’m of the opinion that, “children can be incredibly resilient, especially when given structure and love; that repression and unemployment and illness all undermine one’s sense of their inherent human dignity” (week 9). this is one area where i feel called to help (primarily through charity donations most likely) more so than any others. to shift gears though, another area that i feel i can work to improve in our society involves race relations. i believe that “our socialization renders us racially illiterate. when you add a lack of humility to that illiteracy (because we don’t know what we don’t know), you get the break-down we so often see when trying to engage white people in meaningful conversations about race” (week 10). i try to stay as humble as i can in these discussions, and i feel as though i’m positively contributing to society by recognizing my inherent shortcomings. humility is the key for me. this was what i chose to focus on with the week 11 question of becoming wiser. i believe the only way to effectively achieve wisdom through humility is by recognizing what is unknown, avoiding “echo chambers”, and acknowledging that i don’t have all the answers (week 11). 5 works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau week one “hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau week two “three key questions ” by father michael himes moreau week three “navigating your career journey” by the meruelo center for career development moreau week four “discerning a life well-lived” by irish compass moreau week five “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven “teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenberg moreau week nine “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism by robin diangelo moreau week ten “how to avoid and echo chamber” by thinknd moreau week eleven https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s final integration pawelek 1 whittington moreau 23 april 2022 path to a life well-lived i believe it is increasingly difficult to articulate one specific way to live a life well-lived. just these past few months of my life have been telling of the type of person i want to be in life. i think it is exceedingly important to discern this. i believe that my time here at notre dame thus far has guided me into not only finding how i want to live a life well-lived, but also by becoming the person i want to be, who is living in the path towards a life well-lived. there are various values and beliefs that have already been shaped into finding out my true morals and how that will impact the rest of my life. although i know i am far from being perfect, and my goals will continue to change and develop through my years, at this university and outside of it, i do believe i am heading in the right direction to find myself. in moreau fye week 13 of moreau we were to write our personal mission statement. i think this was a very helpful and useful activity to conduct. i started my time here wanting to graduate and fulfill my purpose of wanting to be a woman for others. i want to use my gifts and talents to benefit all of those surrounding me. i think this has immensely grown within my first year here at notre dame. after being exposed to all of the service and community activities presented to all students here, i am overwhelmed by how many opportunities there are to serve those around me. i have gotten involved in various activities in hopes of finding my passion. one exercise that helped me discern this mission was integration one; writing my eulogy. this exposed me to how i want to live and how i want to be remembered by those who follow me. pawelek 2 furthermore, it should be noted that this will come in several different lights. there will be struggles and sufferings, but it is from those that we grow and alter our behaviors to become stronger. i must also grow in wisdom by keeping an open mind, to the point where i soak up as much information from those around me as possible. and i will also act with courage, as it takes a courageous, or brave, person to positively impact the world. ultimately, writing my mission statement was a great way to get me a concrete path to follow for my next three years here and the following years after on my life journey. one way in which this mission statement first went underway was in the practicing of self-reflection during moreau fye week 1. part of this week's learning and growing was beginning with self reflection. it was a self reflection on the semester past, and me as an individual person. i think this really helped me begin to discern what i want my life to look like in these next three years, because in order to know where i am going, i must know where i have been. questions like “which experience was most meaningful to you last semester?” ( “self-reflection” moreau fye week 1) allow me to not only reflect, but take a second look at what i have done that made me truly happy, or left an impact on me, and will therefore catalyst to what i want to do in the future. in a similar sense, during moreau fye week 2, after watching the hesburgh film, we were given a model of someone who lived a life well-lived, and seeing how it was so important and prioritized to him made it seem more essential to us. this was accurately represented when the film stated “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith but in the end you find strength” (24.56 hesburgh moreau fye week 2). with growth comes suffering, but my philosophy is that the suffering will only expedite the growth and build a good basis of character within yourself. i pawelek 3 think this is well reflected in the quote, because to fall back on your faith when you are suffering is necessary too. i know that for myself it is important to focus on god and pray when i am suffering, and somehow this helps calm and center my life. i also believe that suffering makes the good parts of life so much sweeter. this is a perfect sentiment when thinking of how to live a life well-lived. there is no such thing as a perfect life, but leaning on god and acting in the best way for humanity is one way in which i can grow into my beliefs of a good life. one way in which i think we can go about this was by a realization i came to during moreau fye week 3. living every moment as if it is my last. in this week’s section, we learned about a nun who celebrated death. although there is a stigma around death, it is people like this nun who emphasize the importance of recognizing death and the inevitability of death who raise awareness. ultimately, i think this will positively impact the earth. the first thing that comes to my mind when i think about death is “if this was your last day on earth how would you live it?” i think if we lived with that in mind the majority of people would change their ways to ways of kindness and appreciation of everything around them. furthermore, we could change our lives for the better by utilizing the three key questions and creating joy for ourselves and for others. ultimately, the thought of death makes me strive for living in the very present and making every moment matter, which, to me, is an essential part of life, and is incorporated in my mission statement. during moreau fye week 4, we examined what we can do after our next 3 years here, and i think this is a very important sentiment in order to think about what we must do in these next 3 years to prepare ourselves for the future. in this week we were exposed to various articles and activities that aid in helping steer us to our interests. in one instance it is stated “there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research”(“navigating pawelek 4 your career journey” moreau fye week 4). i really like this quote, because it puts into perspective how time consuming it is to put together a career for yourself. i would definitely say that after i read this statement i had a feeling in my stomach that bunched up. i know these next four years will form the rest of my life, and thinking about that is alarming to me. however with finishing the article i saw how it is a step by step process, and not all at once. i think this relates to many things in my life, meaning that if i am feeling overwhelmed in a situation i can take a step back and have a moment to gather my thoughts and carry on. i think this is an essential life skill that will prepare me for the years to come after leaving notre dame, and i want to spread awareness about the importance of this process, just like in this week's activities. in a similar sense, to help the students prepare for the future that is upon us, we must be open to explore the resources that are presented to us here at notre dame, which we saw in moreau fye week 5. here we were introduced to irishcompass which is an amazing resource to connect to past alumni of notre dame and see the journey they took and network with them. ultimately, this is a very cool and interesting platform that is available to students because it just shows the connection between all past and present and future notre dame students. i am excited to one day be on this site helping the current students at notre dame at that time. helping others is a necessary part of life in my opinion, and i am thrilled that irishcompass fits perfectly into this plan. self-reflection is an essential element of witnessing the importance of yourself, which in turn provides each one of us with a mission statement for ourselves. this process is accurately represented in moreau fye week 6. i think it was well put that “i’ve come to believe that the qualities most critical for success in today’s world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness” (“the pawelek 5 right way to be introspective” moreau fye week 6). i think this is a very important quote. i think especially in today’s day and age, it is very common to get caught up in technology. we get wrapped into elements of social media and we lose ourselves. there are many times that i catch myself getting into a negative place with myself and my self-worth because of what i see on social media. this quote is very important to me because it shows how we must take a moment to reflect on ourselves in everyday life. our lives are, undoubtedly, very busy, but we must carve out time to reflect on us and the world around us, and this will ultimately benefit my future, which perfectly coincides with my mission statement to reflect on my actions in order to make me the best person i can be. i think one crucial question we must ask ourselves while we are attempting to discern how to live a life well-lived is what can we do for others? i think this was very clear within moreau fye week 7. i think our world today has gotten increasingly selfish. we constantly ask “what’s in it for me? or something along the lines of “how does this benefit me?” personally, i think this is the wrong way to go about life. one way that i think is important to growing friendships and relationships and connections in my life is through serving others. this can be in a very small, and seemingly insignificant way, but to others it may be grand. we must restore and build connections with all types of people. inclusion is part of god’s mission and therefore my mission to live a life well-lived, and i want to live this out fully. in moreau fye week 8, we were to write our own eulogy, and although a weird topic to think about because it encapsulated writing what would be at our funeral, it made me realize how i want to be remembered after i am gone. it put life into perspective and helped me come to the realization that i have personal goals for my future and what i want to do. this truly helped discern a life well-lived to me. pawelek 6 in my life personally, i think it is insanely difficult for me to accept help from those around me, but this is an important part of growing into the human i want to be, as seen in moreau fye week 9. the ideology of accompaniment was a common theme throughout this week. i learned that not only do we need a person to accompany us, but to be there for someone else. i know what it feels like to be lonely, and it is very isolating, and i do not wish that on anyone. i want to leave a positive impact on the earth and the people that surround me daily. this is also included in my personal mission statement because i never want someone to feel alone or like they have no one beside them. it was in moreau fye week 10 that i fully understood just how essential it is to be active in community and how much of a difference it can potentially make in the world. i think one of the biggest problems of exclusion in our society and a reason why it is so prevalent is because people choose to neglect it. i feel like everyone can be guilty of this, including myself. i would never do this intentionally, but sometimes i get nervous and scared that i would say the wrong thing or something offensive to someone, but not on purpose. in a similar sense, we must accept ourselves in order to love the others around us. to bring this week’s readings back to a life well-lived, i think we must make an effort of inclusion, and i think i must delve into this myself. challenging ourselves to get outside of our comfort zones is also increasingly important, it could be something as simple as challenging someone else’s ideas, like we saw in moreau fye week 11. “surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (thinknd video moreau fye week 11). i think this quote poses a very interesting ideology. personally, i know that i am at fault for surrounding myself with people who think just like me, or share the same views on things like politics or just general opinions, because it is comfortable. i consider myself a very non-confrontational person. pawelek 7 i never want to start a fight or contribute to a fight of any kind. i think this is why i like to surround myself with people with similar views as me, because it lessens the chance of a fight or disagreement. however, i do see how this is a problem and i think i shouldn’t be afraid to disagree with others, because that is how people and relationships grow, and we learned in a previous week of moreau that relationships enhance a life, which creates a life well-lived. being a steward of change is necessary as seen in moreau fye week 12. it was inspiring to read what dean g. marcus cole does. he is a definite steward for change reading that made me want to follow and be someone like that. i included in my mission statement helping those who are vulnerable and i think this is essential to live a life well-lived, because this is what god intended his children to do. all in all, i believe i have a good basis of learning and understanding of how to live a life well-lived and i can confidently stand by my mission statement and live it out to the fullest in the upcoming years of my life. integration #4 4/27/22 capstone integration searching for fulfillment my personal mission statement is to live my life to the fullest, to seek fulfillment, and to never give up on my goals. i strive to treat others fairly and equally and at the end of my life i hope i can look back without any regrets on how i choose to live my life. this is at least what i wrote for week 13 of moreau.(“week 13 qqc” by moreau fye week 13) however, i think my true mission statement that i carry with me every day is much simpler. it is to seek fulfillment in every aspect of my life so at the end of the day, i can be happy with what i have achieved on this earth. just as we explored in week 3 of moreau, we all will die and we must stay cognizant of that. while i initially did not like confronting the idea of death. remembering that you eventually will die, keeps you motivated to achieve more.("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) i believe that i mainly seek fulfillment in my relationships with others. this can be achieved in multiple ways but the biggest one is through love and making relationships that bring out the best in us. in the discernment activity, i was able to connect with someone that i considered to be a friend that makes life worth living.("discernment activity" moreau fye week 5) i also was able to reflect on why that relationship was so important to me. i came to the conclusion that it was the mutual love we both had for each other that made that relationship so special. not love in a romantic sense, but in the sense that we cared for the other person and wanted what was best for them, even if it was hard for us. this kind of love was also really exemplified by fr. greg boyles in his engagement with his local community and helping many of them off the streets.("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7) i feel like the relationships with this love create a sense of fulfillment because you know you are in a relationship that is genuine. there is no way you can fake this love, it is all straight from the heart. one thing that can be preventing us from fulfillment is the idea of false fulfillment, which comes from unloving relationships. this is when everyone around you is making you believe that you achieved something and that you have been fulfilled, but in reality this isn’t the case. this false fulfillment usually sprouts from echo chambers or peer pressure when you’re being https://docs.google.com/document/d/11r43fqhbmko-wufiaikrgs5k7mnohqtkp-v7cvhebkc/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981/download?download_frd=1 told that you’re doing what's cool or what’s right, but in reality it isn’t at all.("how to avoid an echo chamber" bydr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11) these are very dangerous because they can lead us into doing things we should not do, and cause us to later regret our actions. they can set us back on our goal to true fulfillment. i know i felt this earlier in the semester when i tried to conform with others and be cool, but instead was making myself unhappy. i realized that situation though and found others that push me to be the best version of myself. the other positive way fulfillment can be found in relationships is by treating others fairly and holding those around you to that same standard. we have to make sure that love prevails in the world over all of the hate. in times where we hear about hate constantly on the news, or on social media, it is important to show love. hearing marcus cole’s story of how his father was harassed for being black or jacob walsh’s story on how he has struggled with feeling acceptance because he is gay makes me think that there isn’t enough love around us. one should not feel hatred because of their race or sexual orientation. instead we should treat each other with love and respect despite any differences.("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe and i can do something" by marcus cole moreau fye week 12) & ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10) i grew up in a very diverse area where i had the pleasure to see that we all are really the same. it may be the easier route to reject someone, but you also do not know how far acceptance and equal treatment can go in someone's life. just expressing acceptance and love is one of the best things you can do to another human being, so why not do it? this idea also piggybacks with accompaniment, because when treating someone with love, you should also be accompanying them. when steve reifenberg spoke on his experiences being accompanied, i was able to reflect and think that if i was in the same situation, what would i do.(teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9) i believe that i would try to accompany someone because again, you don’t know their situation. maybe just taking the time to help someone will spur a moment filled with fulfillment. maybe it will take you down a path that leads you to your life worth living. these are things you will never know unless you decide to go for it and help others. to me, the idea of fulfillment is synonymous with looking to achieve a life worth living, which was probably the most important lesson from moreau this year. i felt that the idea of a fulfilling life was especially demonstrated when watching the hesburgh movie. while watching, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit i was able to look into the life of a man who achieved fulfillment through his amazing actions.(hesburgh moreau fye week 2) that movie honestly inspired me to look at how i could try to change the world hopefully in my future. this can be difficult though, especially when looking at careers. a lawyer has very limited options on how to affect his community, but hopefully i will be able to do as much as i can pro-bono to represent those who need me. i was able to think more deeply about this idea of having a fulfilling career in week 7, when we completed an activity that forced me to truly reflect on this topic.("exploring a life well lived career development reflection" by merulo center for career development moreau fye week 4) i was able to realize that although it won’t be easy, if you care enough about searching for fulfillment in your life, you can achieve it regardless of your career. within all of us i believe there is fear that we will not fulfill our goals or live a life well lived. this is saddening, however i believe that we all can prevent this by searching for aspects of a life well lived in all of our experiences. during the first week of moreau we explored the importance of self reflection and how taking time to look at ourselves can be very beneficial in life.("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) i really enjoyed this article because i feel like we commonly get caught up in worrying about unfulfillment that we end up creating a self fulfilling prophecy. i know i have been caught worrying too much about not doing anything meaningful that i did nothing at all. the search for fulfillment is unique because we constantly are doing it, but if we try too hard we usually set ourselves up for failure. sometimes we need to just take a few minutes and take a break from the world and our stress. this was discussed in “5 minutes” where the idea of just taking 5 minutes to pray instead of getting upset or frustrated will help to change our mindset.("5 minutes" by aria swarr moreau fye week 6) i applied when studying for finals because i was becoming so frustrated when i was unable to get one calculus problem. i ended up taking a 5 minute break and when i came back, i was refreshed and solved the problem. https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144732 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 integration throughout my high school life, i would say that i was a man of little convictions. i lived a sheltered life, in a town without much controversy or struggle. i loved my family and my town and didn’t feel i needed much else. i’ve become aware that, at least to me, this was a problem. i do not wish to be a drifter, who goes through life not rooted down to any strong convictions. i’d say that my convictions are still budding, but since coming to notre dame i have begun the process of cultivating them. one conviction that i hold now, and hope to carry with me for the rest of my life, is that laughter and a smile can turn around anyone’s day or perhaps even life around. this conviction leads me to live a couple of different ways. firstly, i value humor in those i surround myself with. this is slightly more subconscious because i myself tend to crack a fair amount of jokes, i tend to become closer to people who have similar senses of humor to me. hearing someone's laugh because of something i said is honestly one of the most gratifying experiences i can receive. i love laughter. secondly, i try to live my life as optimistically as possible, being as positive as i can when around others. i have been blessed, i know that, so in my mind it is my responsibility to live in a way that exudes happiness and hopefully will bring others happiness as well. my conviction drives me to stay positive even in situations when positivity is hard to come by. another conviction i’m trying to ground myself in, is to live life for a certain few people who are most important to me. now this conviction is one that hasn’t completely formed yet, but i believe as i continue to grow closer to certain individuals at notre dame, this conviction will also continue to grow. i’ve been a people pleaser all my life. i cared about what every single person thought of me, no matter how well i knew them, or what kind of person they themselves were. i couldn’t handle it if someone didn’t like me, or did not want to become my friend. this made many friendships for me that were very superficial, and not long lasting. recently i’ve started to shift into a mindset that cares less about what the herd thinks, and more about what certain people in my life think, and it is so freeing. at the start of college, there were many times were i couldn’t sleep even if i was tired because i thought i’d be missing out on what other people, who i hardly knew, were doing. i suffered from major fomo. my mental health suffered from not being able to appease everyone, and spending enough time with every person, there just wasn’t enough time in the day, and that stressed me out greatly. i was lying in bed one night listening to music going on outside in a room next to me. i didn’t really want to go, but i felt that i needed to in order to stay relevant in everyone else’s eyes. just as i was planning to push myself to go, one of my best friends facetimed me. i was relieved to have an excuse not to go out and be able to stay in my room. the night went by so fast, and i ended up staying on that call for more than 3 hours, and i know i had a better time just talking than i would’ve had i tried to go out. after that night, i reflected on my life. looking back, i realized that the highlights of my life were made when i was surrounded by a few certain people. don’t get me wrong, i love humans, and people in general, and i will always be a people pleaser at heart. i don’t think i will be able to ever completely get over caring about what everyone thinks. however i’m able to put these thoughts on the back burner, in order to spend time with the people that mean the most to me. i am going to put as much effort into making sure that my “choice few” have the best life possible, and will spend what i have left on others. this conviction is one that is vital for me to live a happy and healthy life, and as i grow, i hope this conviction grows with me. it may seem contradictory to my last conviction, but one more conviction vital to me as a person, is to live life being as supportive as possible to all of those around me. i do not need to be a main character. for the longest time i thought that i had to do something huge to change the world. this is simply not true. the people around me, to me, are my world. if i can help them to accomplish whatever they desire, i will be just as happy as if i had done something big myself. when i say supportive, it sounds as if i will be just a follower who helps from the background, but this is not necessarily true. taking into account deresiewicz’s statements, being a leader is one of the most supportive roles one can take. if i need to take charge in order to help someone i will, but i’m also okay with living life helping in smaller ways. some of my greatest pleasures come from doing the little things that no one sees, whether that be service saturdays, or dropping off small gifts expecting nothing in return, or just being there for someone in their time of need. i love helping people, and i hope to live my life helping as many people as i can, while of course still holding to my other conviction of putting the few closest friends and family first. as said, i my convictions are still growing, and i hope to obtain new ones as i grow, but for now i am content with having few convictions. my convictions all involve bringing joy into others lives, which in turn will bring me joy. i hope my convictions will lead me on a path that allows me to be a light shining through the cracks of others lives. feng moreau fye 29 april 2022 anita’s recipe for a life well lived (serves: 1) mission statement: i am dedicated to the pursuit of excellence and intellectual stimulation while also maintaining emotional availability and a level of emotional maturity that allows me to fulfill a high moral calling. i strive to use my privilege and skills for the benefit of others, especially those that are underprivileged or suffering, by being generous and approaching the challenge of doing so with humility. i am also dedicated to building and strengthening relationships with those around me that inspire me and support my journey to being the best version of myself. in return for their support, i hope to use my natural inclination to be introspective to create an environment of vulnerability and acceptance that facilitates relationships built on trust and mutual respect. as this academic year comes to an end and i begin planning for next semester’s classes and activities, i inevitably reflect on the successes and failures of the past eight months. to actively digest formative experiences and extract lessons from them is both a time-consuming and mentally consuming task that, for better or for worse, must be done if one wishes to grow. i hope to take the task of writing this essay as an opportunity for me to do this reflection and set goals for the next few years with the above mission statement in mind (writing a personal mission statement activity – moreau fye week thirteen). the first aspect of my mission statement describes the pursuit of excellence and intellectual stimulation. while my parents were never extremely strict on me when it came to academic success, seeing their success as immigrants from impoverished regions of china inadvertently inspired me to set similarly high standards for myself at school. taking this inspiration into college, my wish to make them proud and their efforts “worth it” has been the most effective motivation for me to perform well in classes and actively engage in the communities around me. this is not to say that i do not frequently fall short of my own expectations and disappoint myself as a result. for example, given the large overlap between social media and popular culture, it is near impossible to remove myself from technology if i hope to be socially aware and up to date on trending topics and discourse. while i have recently made process in this regard after actively taking steps towards improvement, i still struggle with having a short attention span and getting easily distracted by social media. these habits detract from the time i can spend consuming meaningful material but are only perpetuated by the social pressure to stay “cultured” and knowledgeable of trending events and topics, especially in america, where popular culture is pervasive and dramatized. moving forward, if i hope to upkeep a level of intellectual stimulation, i must be mindful of my relationship with technology. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) on the same topic of consuming stimulating and meaningful information, i also must acknowledge stagnancy in the sources of conversation around me, in both casual and classroom settings. recognizing when i am in, or even instigating, thought bubbles or echo chambers, is the first step to creating a more well-rounded and diversified environment. if i exclusively converse with people that share similar values and perspectives as me, no exchanging of ideas will occur (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd – moreau fye week eleven). not only is this very dystopian and orwellian, but it is counterproductive to the pursuit of excellence and intellectual stimulation. instead, i must take advantage of the diversity in thought that notre dame, and even the internet, has to offer, by expanding my horizons and stepping out of my comfort zone. the second facet of my mission statement discusses my dedication to helping others, especially people of underprivileged backgrounds, with a humble attitude (“teaching accompaniment” by professor reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). i must attribute most of my success to the generosity and gratuitousness of others, who supported me when i was undeserving. similarly, i hope to support those that are not as fortunate as i am on a relational level, with my inclusion, and on a systemic level, with my future career. a life well-lived cannot be isolated but is interconnected with others. therefore, to truly live a life well-lived, you must support the journeys of other people who hope to live a fulfilling life as well (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). there is an assumed responsibility of active inclusion in this statement. “others” includes everyone, regardless of gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” – moreau fye week ten). one cannot live well if they are arbitrarily persecuted or excluded. as a frequent recipient of exclusion due to my race or gender, i can empathize with others who experience similar kinds of discrimination and am therefore committed to creating an environment where no one feels belittled, misrepresented, or disrespected for those reasons. inclusion, or ending separation, is one way to end the cycle of hate, according to dean g. marcus cole (“i am george floyd…” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). i am currently interested in working in a field related to sustainability, specifically one that is also involved with policymaking and research. doing so combines my values – helping others and protecting the environment, interests – academic research and policy, and skills – advocacy, communication, and collaboration (“navigating your career journey” – moreau fye week four). i hope to mitigate the effects of climate change that disproportionately affect those in impoverished communities. even if my career interests change, i hope to always keep my values at the forefront of my mind. the last component of my mission statement is my devotion to strengthening my relationships with those in my immediate community. specifically, i hope to use my natural propensity to be vulnerable to develop strong emotional connections with those around me and eventually, establish a relationship with a strong foundation of trust and mutual respect for one another. the simplest way to do this is to be selective with who i welcome into my immediate community in the first place. surrounding myself with people that are inspiring, uplifting, and equally supportive of me will surely make the transition into building strong connections seamless and effortless (“hesburgh” – moreau fye week two). i am grateful to say that the support system i currently have at notre dame, and at home, is one that is made up of people who are motivating and encouraging. their good intentions make it easy for me to not only take their advice but their criticism as well when it comes to emotional matters (week five discernment conversation activity – moreau fye week five). in the upcoming semesters, i hope to take further advantage of notre dame’s strong dorm communities and alumni network to find people that can provide social and academic support, respectively. while this mission statement is a goal, it should not be an expectation that i must always hold myself to. i must recognize my imperfections and weaknesses, and be patient with myself when i seemingly fall short due to unforeseen circumstances or simply, my nature as a human (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). over the next three years, i will inevitably come across obstacles and challenges that will frustrate me and discourage me. in those instances, i must remain hopeful and confident in my efforts and find joy in being dissatisfied (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). regardless, i am excited to see what the future holds, and how i will manifest this mission statement into action over the next three years at notre dame. integration threecvb from freshman caroline to freshman caroline: insights of a life well-lived dear freshman year of high school caroline, hey! it’s me, other freshman caroline (freshman year of college caroline, that is.) yes, spoiler alert, you do get into college, so don’t worry too much about that (i know you’ll worry a lot about getting into college and getting into a “good” college no matter what i tell you, but i am going to tell you anyway.) there is so much more to a life well-lived than where you will end up for the next four years after high school. yes, where you will spend those four years matters (especially because you are going to be spending them somewhere incredible!) but the four years you have right now in high school are so much more than just preparatory years for the next chapter of your lifethey are the current chapter of your life, which i know can be difficult to keep in mind. i’ve learned a lot about what a life well-lived means over the past couple of years, but especially in the past couple of months. hopefully, i can impart some of this advice to you so that you can live out your current chapter of life to the fullest. first, let me give you some advice about work/life balance. i know you study hard and study a lot. sometimes, i think you might study too much. yes, studying is important, but there is simply no way that sitting at your desk for five hours is entirely productive. keep this in mind: the more time you spend away from your work, the better that work will be, most often.1 you will be so much more productive if you give yourself breaks and allow yourself to rest. i know it isn’t easy to let yourself rest, but please, i beg of you: incorporate some time for stillness into your everyday life. you will feel so much more at peace with yourself and the world around you if you give yourself just a few minutes before bed to sit, breathe, and pray. also, try to get 1 “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, week 1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ outside. in college, some of the best minutes of your day will be walking or running outside before a long day of classes. second, i want you to know that the most powerful way to enrich your life is not through achieving a certain status, having a certain gpa, or getting a certain time in a race, but rather through the relationships you have and your commitment to making the world a better place. about a month ago, i watched a movie about father ted hesburgh (this might be a college spoiler alert, apologies in advance!) and learned a lot from the film about putting relationships at the core of what you do. one story that stuck with me was when father hesburgh was given an emerald ring by the pope, and the ring simply sat in his desk collecting dust.2 i think this is a great reminder of what truly matters in life: the people with whom you live your life, not material things or accolades. and yes, it is great to have goals because those are definitely a part of enriching your life, but ultimately, the foundation of what you do needs to be rooted in a love for the people around you.3 well, here comes another spoiler. i really don’t know how to explain the whole situation of march 2020 to you, but i’ll try to give you the gist. basically, there’s a global pandemic that causes school to be canceled for a month, you can’t leave your house for a few months, and you can’t swim, play tennis, see your friends, or safely wander the aisles of trader joe’s (another spoiler: the college you will attend has a nearby trader joe’s so you can continue to wander aimlessly through that magical store! this is most definitely part of a well-lived life, so keep it up). during this time of lockdown and quarantine, you will truly learn how the people around you are the foundation of your purpose and meaning. march through may of 2020 will be the longest time of your life where you haven’t swam, and you will learn that yes, you do miss 3 “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, week 7 2 “hesburgh”, week 2 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 swimming, but you miss your coaches and teammates a lot too. you will grow closer to your family, especially to your brother, and realize just how incredible they are. you’ll also grow closer to god, and find the incredible and powerful truth that “in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.”4 in short, i cannot emphasize enough how important it is to nurture your relationships and let the people around you know that you love them, especially your family. in college, you will live just down the hall from people who will become some of your best friends. it’s just like one long sleepover party, except it’s really expensive and you have to study a lot. i know that connecting with other kids in high school might be tricky, but i want you to know that it gets better in college. there are some awesome people out there, and you will find them eventually in south bend, indiana (whoops, another spoiler). my next piece of advice for a well-lived life is to try new things and challenge yourself. i know that you are terrified of anything less than perfection, so this one might be hard for you, but just try your best. remember that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the watersjust get out and experience life.”5 i give you full permission to try lots of different hobbies, clubs, foods, sports, board games, whatever! another quick spoiler: you will sign up for a half marathon your first year of college, and i know that as a freshman in high school you hate running. so, the advice here is to not box yourself in: allow yourself to experience life in new ways and embrace new challenges. here’s another one: i challenge you to silence the voice of self-doubt in your mind; the one telling you that you’ll never be creative enough, smart enough, or confident enough.6 because you are so capable! when you have a plan, you can confront any challenge that comes your way. in college, you will learn that google calendar, a planner, and a positive mindset will allow you to break down challenges into more manageable 6 phone call with debbie and marc van bell, week 5 5 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development, week 4 4 “meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, week 3 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html tasks, so you can study and work but still have time to spend with your friends and family. challenges are indeed manageable and are definitely a part of a well-lived life. my last piece of advice for a life well-lived is remembering to put your faith at the center of everything you do. i know that you might not feel particularly connected to god right now, but throughout high school, and especially as you transition into college, you will realize that without faith, nothing seems right. it truly is the core of everything in your life. your life is so much bigger than just you, and you can surrender your control, perfectionism, and anxieties to god. in college, you will incorporate daily reflection and prayer so that you can come to truly know yourself by knowing god.7 in closing, i want you to remember that a life well-lived is not a “perfect” life; rather, it is an imperfect life where you accept messiness, accept challenges, and find snippets of joy everywhere you go. lots of love to you, caroline. i hope these next four years are well lived! ~caroline, march 2022 7 “ways to practice mindfulness” by mcwell, week 6 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view tommy hedman exemplifying service through my career and relationships: my personal mission statement and pursuit of a life well-lived mahatma gandhi once said, “the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” although there are a million different paths a person’s life can take, i believe that the one fundamental facet constituting a life well-lived is service to others. if your career and time spent on earth is not dedicated to bettering the lives of others around you, what do you really have? wealth? status? fame? without meaningful relationships in your life and having a positive impact on others around you, i would argue that these things are worthless. after all, “no one knows how much time they have been given, so we must make the most of every opportunity we have to better the lives of others around us” (“moreau integration 3” by tommy hedman moreau fye week 8). this is precisely why my mission statement constitutes service to others through my career and relationships, something that i believe is key to the pursuit of a life well-lived. as i say, “i believe that success is not measured by wealth or status, but by love and happiness. these things, i hold, come out of service to others, the key to a life well-lived in my estimation” (“moreau: week 13 mission statement” by tommy hedman moreau fye week 13). when i stepped foot onto the campus of the university of notre dame for the first time as a student in august of 2021, i remember feeling extremely excited about the next four years of my life, but also very nervous as well. as pico iyer described, i felt as if i was “standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i felt almost as if life had passed me by already despite being an 18 year old with the rest of my life and career to look forward to. all of my childhood friends and high school buddies were moving away for college, and i constantly found myself wishing back the times when we played night games together in the neighborhood, met on friday nights at our high school’s football games, or biked along the mississippi river at sunset. the need to take more responsibility and grow up hit me like a truck when i was alone in my dorm room after saying goodbye to my parents for the first time, and a million different questions rattled around my mind regarding my major, discernment, and how to make the most of the next four years of my life. however, after settling down, finding community in my dorm, and taking advantage of some resources on campus, i started to realize some of the forms that i wanted my life to take here at nd and beyond. first of all, i had to be really honest with myself about my goals and interests, something i did by asking myself the “three key questions” that we discussed in class: 1) what gives you joy? 2) what are you really good at? 3) what do the people around you really need? (“three key questions” by fr. michal himes moreau fye week 3). after falling into the trap that is the mindset of, “i am deciding my career path when i am picking my major”, i came to the realization that whatever major i picked or whatever i did in life, i had a responsibility to directly impact the lives of others for the better (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). i really internalized the value of accompaniment, explained by professor steve reifenberg as, the “blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). with this in mind, i came to believe that i was called to serve my community as a physician. i believe that through my career as a medical professional, i could use my talents in stem fields that i am really interested in to assist others, especially those who are less fortunate and lack proper access to medical care in their communities. also, i believe that through a medical career, i could interact and come to learn and understand the stories of people with different backgrounds and upbringings from myself. as dean g. marcus cole expresses, “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). additionally, i believe that service through your personal relationships with other people in your life are crucial to a life well-lived. as pope francis wisely said, “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i believe that humbling yourself and being a servant leader in your relationships with others, whether that be your family, friends, or strangers, is key to living a meaningful life. it is only in this way that the impacts of our work and actions are able to extend beyond ourselves, and we are thus able to leave a legacy and lasting imprint on others long after we are gone. also, in welcoming and including others from all walks of life, we are able to “enrich our lives by the different qualities of the many members of our community” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). after my first year at notre dame and by immersing myself in the community it prides itself on, my conviction that relationships and other people are key to a life well-lived has only strengthened. the notre dame family is something that is real and tangible, and it can be seen in a plethora of ways, including talking with father hesburgh in his office at 2 or 3 in the morning like some students used to do in the past (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). this sort of community is something that i strive to establish in my life beyond nd, and i think it is a key component of what it means to live an intentional and service-oriented life. over the course of the next three years, i believe that my mission statement will animate my life in the sense that i will develop close relationships with my peers, mentors, and professors and further solidify my academic interests and future career aspirations. as opposed to the general trend that our society is heading towards in terms of polarization via politics, religion, or social media, as expressed by eitan hersh, i hope that my mission statement will lead me towards more civil and meaningful discussions with my peers in order to get a better idea and understanding of the truth and right way to believe or act (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media and eitan hersh moreau fye week 11). also, i think that my mission statement will allow me to have a profound experience at nd as i come to embrace the culture, community, and network of interactions it boasts more. undoubtedly, there will be challenges and bumps in the road along the way, whether that be in my relationships or beliefs. however, instead of looming in my inadequacies or failures, i must “focus on what i can do for others or what i can do already instead of what i cannot do and what i do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week 6). equipped with strong relationships and a commitment to the service of others throughout my life and career, i believe that i will be well set up for a meaningful and fulfilling life, something that everyone ardently searches for. everyone has the capacity to live a life well-lived, but it is up to them to use their gifts and talents in the most effective and impactful way possible. as my dad once said to me, “god has blessed everyone with special gifts. it is up to us to figure out what they mean and how to use them in the service of others” (“week five discernment conversation activity” by tommy hedman moreau fye week 5). moreau integration writing my notre dame dash my mission statement is to make my dash count. in my first integration i spoke about my dash, the little line that sits between my date of birth and date of death. it is just a meaningless line to those passing by, but, to those who knew me, it contains every moment of my life on earth. when i say i want to make my dash count i mean i want to leave a memory that makes people smile but more importantly inspires others. while this dash will extend throughout my entire life, i want to specifically focus on the little part of my dash that is college. when i committed to notre dame i prepared myself for the best four years of my life, but i also prepared myself for four years of opportunities to ignite change. at a school like notre dame academic excellence and community involvement are prerequisites with the expectation that over these four years we will build upon these and become leaders and advocates; i hope to live up to these expectations. similar to father hesburgh in his film i hope my memory is filled with helping others and taking risks. father hesburgh was not afraid to speak his mind even when his opinions were unpopular, he spoke with fortitude and eloquence making it impossible to ignore him even if his beliefs did not align with your own (“hesburgh” moreau fye week 2). when addressing the challenging topics of race and inclusion he was never barred by societal expectations, and, in the process, inspired all that walk onto the notre dame campus to find strength and confidence in your beliefs. similarly, dean g. marcus cole spoke of the importance of forcing ourselves to create a more inclusive community saying “we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (dean g. marcus cole: i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by dean g. marcus colemoreau fye week 12). creating an inclusive society means diving outside of our comfort zones and taking the risk of expanding our own circles. he https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ inspires everyone to step up and actually ignite useful change rather than just whispering about the issues racing through our country and world. these men are incredible but they were also controversial and their beliefs did not align with everyone around them. they inspire me to not find safety in agreement but rather to find strength in my own beliefs. as the nun in our week 3 reading said “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). we only have so many years to ignite change and hopefully leave this world better than we found it so it is vital that we do not waste time trying to fit in or be complacent. for myself, over the next three years this means standing up firmly for pro-choice, improving accessibility for anyone disabled, and promoting acceptance other religions. while i think the catholic faith is great and i am excited to grow in my own religion i think doing that includes standing up for what i believe even if others strongly disagree. when i read the bible and interpret the sermons, i believe god loves everyone no matter if you believe in him or not, if you are married to a man, women, or someone gender non-conforming, if you are the same gender you were assigned at birth, or if you make the gut wrenching decision to have an abortion. “jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame”moreau fye week 10). to actually try to implement change and stand up for my beliefs i need to work on being okay with not always being “nice and agreeable” but rather being confident and outspoken about my own views. typically, i try to please people, but in that i think i get lost in my own beliefs trying to satisfy everyone else. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ a major theme of this semester has been about creating an accepting environment and while i think having conversations about this in moreau is great i also think notre dame can do more to promote inclusivity specifically through history courses about marginalized groups and a required theology that is not about catholicism. i believe helping to implement these is especially important at a catholic school because even if we do not agree with some of the lessons the classes would teach it will help us grow in our own beliefs and have a complete perspective when communicating with others. “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree”(how to avoid an echo chamber, dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). if we let ourselves become trapped in a bubble we will not be well educated citizens and with that we will be unable to make productive change. in order to try to escape this bubble and just overall be a better member of society i want to work on surrounding myself with people who are different from me. i think there is so much we can learn from everyone elses experiences whether it is a difference in location, beliefs, race, sexual orientation etc. through hopefully creating change over these next three years i also want to help bring awareness to those with disabilities which is why i am a part of enable. this club has genuinely been one of the best parts of my freshman year and i am excited to continue with the club and hopefully pursue a career in biomedical engineering. in bringing awareness to those with disabilities one thing we often talk about during the club is how we should amplify the voices of people with limb differences but not speak over them. this reminded me of our reading from week 9 where they said “the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9). through enable i have also realized how important https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144764 interactions are in the college experience. through the friends i’ve made and the people i have worked with i have learned so much about different lifestyles and been challenged to create better solutions and use my intelligence for good. “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). the experience that really stands out to me is actually getting to talk to the people we are making the prosthetics for and it has made me fall in love with the field. it has also reinforced the conversation my mom and i had during week 5 when we talked about what i valued (conversation with mommoreau fye week 5). at the top of that list was helping others and through this club i have truly discovered how great of an impact we can have on this world outside of just speaking out against social injustices. this club has also combined my goals of helping others with my goal of enjoying life because enable genuinely brings me so much joy. while i believe both enable and standing up for my beliefs are essential for my college experience, i also believe that part of having a good college experience and life in general is to have fun and enjoy each moment. i repeat this phrase “enjoy every moment” often but i believe it really sums up what it means to have a good life. life is so far from perfect so we need to find a reason to smile even when life is challenging. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!”(navigating your career journey -moreau fye week 4). even if some of the experiences we are having right now kind of suck to say the least they are all teaching important lessons. for instance, this semester my engineering group had to create an app. it was a mess and we didn’t finish until 30 minutes before it was due, but this experience taught me how essential teamwork is and how to stay calm even when school is stressful. then, after we finally finished the project we walked to the huddle in the pouring rain and got ice cream and overall it was one of the most memorable parts of this semester. this experience https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ really reminded of me of week 1; “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by iyer moreau fye week 1). at this moment i was stressed, overwhelmed, frustrated and overall just having a horrible day; but i took a deep breath and just let life slow down. the moment i let life slow down we were able to finish the project and make some hilarious memories in the process. these lessons of learning to love the process of school, learning, hard projects and life in general has helped me be less stressed and enjoy school so much more so i want to bring these lessons with me throughout the next three years. next year i will be on the welcome week committee and i want to particularly teach the incoming freshmen how important it is to appreciate all the little memories. i hope that is what people think of when they think of me, someone who could find joy even in the worst moments. finally, as i write about the future i want to be sure i focus on the present and never dwell on the past. even looking back at this semester i think of many moments where i wish i had done things differently and i have asked myself “why on earth would you say that?” or “why did you do that, that was dumb”. however i want to change my mindset especially over these next three years. ““why” questions trap us in our past, “what” questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). if i really want to ignite change and be the best version of myself to enjoy my college experience i need to focus on looking how i can improve rather than being disappointed that i made a mistake. to work on this i want to start journaling more and focus on being the best person i can be each day. now, when i say this i don’t mean i need to be perfect but rather working on just being the best version i can be. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ overall, i want to be confident in my own beliefs, use my time here to help those with limb differences, and just have the time of my life. notre dame has made this past year the best in my 19 years on earth and i am so excited to help share this world with the incoming freshman and find joy in every experience and opportunities for granted. mark hennin integration 3 in order to pursue a life well-lived, i need to reflect on what my goal’s in life are and what i believe makes a life truly well-lived. for me, a life well-lived is based on the ideals and virtues of friendship, doing good for others and the world, and being disciplined in any area of work. in my eyes, what it means to be successful is to set a high standard for yourself in every aspect of your life, and then achieve those standards through hard work and dedication. even if you don’t end up achieving those standards, the progress made will surely have benefitted you and those around you. one of the most important characteristics of my mission is relationships. whether it’s with family, friends, or god, relationships are the foundation of everything that i do, because they not only allow you to see the world through others’ point of view, but you are able to provide your own perspective to others. that comes with the responsibility of having to be there for others in need, and to allow yourself to be vulnerable enough to ask for help from others. doing so allows you to grow as a person, and is integral to my mission as a human being. my mission also involves having the courage to step out of your comfort zone, while having the self-realization to know when to take a step back and reflect. by committing to all of these ideas, you allow yourself to become the best version of yourself you can be and can truly live a life well-lived, in my opinion. one of the ideals of pursuing a life well-lived is to have courage. without courage, you will never be able to explore and step out of your comfort zone, and you won’t be able to fully experience all that life has to offer. it reminds me of this quote from the story of father moreau founding notre dame. “the same spirit moved father moreau to found the community of holy cross in which we have responded to the call to serve christ. we live and work as priests and brothers together.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12) this quote exemplifies father moreau’s courage to found the community of holy cross, and if it weren’t for him, we would not be here now today. another way to pursue a life well-lived is by being able to take in information from others. nobody has all the answers, and it takes listening to others, even those you might disagree with, in order to find more wisdom on life. it reminds me of the quote from dr. paul blaschko that says, “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11) by avoiding these echo chambers, we can allow ourselves to listen to those from all walks of life, and thus strengthen our understanding for others’ lives, as well as our own. but just listening to others with differing opinions is not enough, we must also allow for full inclusion of others from all walks of life in order to live a life well-lived. the quote from notre dame’s student life guide said it best when it read, “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 10) just as christians have utilized those with different ideals, qualities, and backgrounds, we as humans must do the same in our everyday lives in order to pick up on things that we might not have found otherwise. one of the most important ways to live a life well-lived is to be vulnerable and accept the fact that there are other people who can help you. no person can do everything themselves, and it’s important to recognize that and accept help from others when needed. this quote from professor steve reifenberg states, “a good physical therapist needs to help you get to a different place, encouraging you to do as much as you can do, at the time you can do it. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ experience suggests how fast or slow that process might be. there needs to be listening as well as advice, addressing and strategizing how to overcome obstacles, confronting setbacks, and at times even prods and cajoles, with the hope and the expectation that the relationship will not be static.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9) whether it’s a therapist, friend, teacher, or family member, it’s important to accept help from others to achieve your goals. relationships themselves are one of the most important things to have in your life because they allow you to share your emotions with someone else, and doing so allows you to take a weight off your shoulders. the quote from tattoos on the heart said it best when it wrote, “i wish i had a magic wand to pass over your pain.” (“tattoos on the heart” by greg boyle moreau fye week 7) this idea of sharing emotions with someone else is necessary in order to destress and live your life to the fullest. another important way to live a life well-lived is to realize when you are struggling and make a plan to do something about it. often times, people can tell when they are in a bad state of mind or stressed, but they don’t do anything to fix it. “but to my astonishment, our data told the exact opposite story. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) this quote from tasha eurich exemplifies this idea. in order to live your best life, you have to not only identify when you are struggling, but also come up with a plan to fix it. one of the most important ways to live a life well-lived is to come up with a plan for your life early on. in week 5, we had the chance to complete the irish compass activity, which allowed students to network with alumni and figure out early ideas for a career path. this is so important because it gives some sort of a structural plan for your stages later in life, and even if it isn’t exactly what you might end up doing in the future, it gives a good baseline. however, before you are able to come up with a plan, you have to know what your interests are in life first. the quote from the notre dame undergraduate career services said it best when it wrote, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4) without testing out different things, you will never know what it is you truly want to do in the future. one way that you can help discern what it is you want in life is by asking for advice from those who are close to you, because they know you almost as good as you know yourself. the quote from father michael himes exemplifies this idea when it reads, “look for the task that will continue to stretch you. that’s all important in discerning that really vital vocation in one’s life. are you continuing to grow? to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.).” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3) by having those close to us give us advice on life, we can discern what is truly best for us. the result of living a life well-lived is by doing something that fits within your life goals and is something that you truly enjoy doing. in week 2, we had the chance to look at some of the domer dozen nominees who are doing great things within their lives. one of them, jessica pedroza, really stood out to me. “now, as a legislative assistant in the office of rep. ruben https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844/download?download_frd=1 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/472889/download?download_frd=1 gallego (az), pedroza works to help advance just national k-12 educational policy that ensures students have access to a high quality education, fully funded schools, and diverse teachers.” (“notre dame alumni association’s ‘domer dozen’ ” by notre dame alumni association moreau fye week 2) pedroza has utilized her education not only to do something that she enjoys, but also something that helps those who need it. this is something that exemplifies a life well-lived in my opinion. lastly, one of the most important steps to living a life well-lived is to take a step back and reflect. often times, we get so caught up in our work and life that we forget the importance of relaxing and reflecting. the quote from pico iyer exemplifies the importance of this reflection when it says, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) by taking a step back and reflecting, you allow yourself to take a break and prepare to come back even stronger. to conclude, the idea of a life well-lived is different for everyone. for me, it means following the ideals of my mission statement, that being utilizing relationships, identifying what i want in life, taking time to relax and reflect, and having the courage to step out of my comfort zone. by following these ideals, i feel that i can live the life that i have always wanted. https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ moreau week 14 capstone integration one notion which was very important to me in my mission statement was the idea that the transformation of self is just as, if not more, important than the transformation i could make of the world. i believe that i must first become a good man before trying to become a great one. this is because it is impossible to do great things without being morally grounded, as father hesburgh say, “our words are buttressed by our deeds, and our deeds are inspired by our convictions” (conaghan quoting hesburgh – week two). we must know what be believe and be deeply convicted about it before we can affect change with it in the world. another requirement i have found for a life well lived is the need for rest and quiet in my own life. as i reflected, i have thought about how all my day is filled with media. even walking to class i will be listening to music or a podcast. this became an issue for me because i became a person who would listen to things “to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. they’re not trying to move anyone. they’re not trying to empower anything. they’re really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way” (hersh – week 11). i became addicted to just having that constant noise in my ear. this has been something i have tried to become more intentional about recently, because i have realized that what we listen to has a real impact on who we are. i recognize that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (iyer – week one). this is a very similar sentiment to a blaise pascal quote about all of man’s problems centering on the inability to sit quietly alone in a room. i have made a specific goal of trying to leave time in my day to relax and be away from media. this free time has allowed me to do more self-reflection. we are never perfect and never will be, but one of the most important things i heard in this course is that “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect” (eurich – week six). by just asking why, we put ourselves in a victim mentality which won’t bring about change as we do not see ourselves in the wrong. life will be far more rewarding if we take ownership of everything which we have even the smallest control over. it prevents us from feeling helpless, and gives the motivation for constant improvement. this extra time to reflect has also kept me busy thinking about my future career. when i came to college, i knew what i liked but did not necessarily know what i wanted to do with it so this time has been important to me to be able to at least attempt to plan. i have found that treating this process with its necessary gravity has helped me think about my future in a much more realistic and thoughtful way (career development center – week four). throughout this year i have also learned about the friendships necessary for a life well lived. coming into notre dame, i knew a few people, but none of them very well. i was pretty much starting fresh, and it was tough in the beginning. even as i got to know people here better, many of my new relationships started to feel very shallow. although for different reasons, i felt very similar to jacob walsh, who says his relationships were shallow “partly out of fear that someone would find out about this secret part of my life; but mostly because until i could be honest with myself, i could not let myself be loved as i was” (walsh – week 10). because of things that happened earlier in my life, i am a very emotionally guarded person, and though i recognize how those things shaped me, going back to the asking what instead of why, i realized these things need to be changed, no matter how upsetting they may be to deal with. even if i do not like parties, i recognize “that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not merely time passing by, life is about interactions” (pope francis – week seven). i will never be complete sitting in my room all day, even if my personality can handle it for a longer amount of time than most others. this difficulty with building new relationships also made me no longer take for granted the special friendships i had made with my friends back home. if anything, being apart from them has made me realize their importance and allowed to become closer. it has meant helping them over the phone, and accompanying them through problems with no easy answer when i am far away (reifenberg – week 9). my final thoughts on a life well lived have to do with the final parts of everyone’s life: death. we do not know when it will come, and most people fear it to some degree or another. the pandemic we are coming out of is a great example of how the fear of death can cause paranoia, even if some measures were in fact good. it is important that we remember and think about our death because “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (graham – week three). if we forget about our mortality, our life in a way becomes meaningless. we fail to recognize that there is good we are called to do in the short time we have on earth. by remembering death, our priorities become best aligned with virtue, which is important as “for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (congregation of the holy cross – week 12). this courage comes when we do not fear death, but rather when we go out into the world ready to share the gospel with fortitude. integration #4 april 29, 2022 moreau fye integration three capstone prompt: how do i pursue a life well-lived? natalia’s journey of the life well-lived i believe it’s important to have goals and dreams, as well as aspirations to succeed. but, what does it mean to be successful? well, for me, the true meaning of success doesn’t derive only from obtaining the most important position or the highest salary. for me, true success is being able to sleep with a clear conscience, knowing that everything i’ve accomplished has been with honesty and integrity. and that is what i think about when asking myself how i want to pursue a life well-lived. pursuing a life well-lived for me, starts by cultivating my soul with moral principles. by moral principles i mean growing in ethical values, focusing on allowing myself to be who i am, even with my weaknesses and imperfections, and living a life based on faith and religion. these are the things that keep me going, keep me motivated, and keep me seeking the best person i can be. everything i’ve said is regarding myself; that is the way i believe i should live my life. however, not everyone is the same; some people believe other characteristics make up a “good life.” precisely because of that, is why i consider it very important for us to be able to discover and understand our beliefs. not look for them, but just reflect and realize that those beliefs are found within ourselves. by recognizing my beliefs and the things i value the most, i can use them as motivation and guidance to pursue my future goals in life. in other words, becoming the person i aspire to be and achieving the “good life” that i have always wanted. when thinking about the things i value the most, i remembered a conversation i had with my best friend, ximena, for the “discernment conversation activity” of moreau fye week five. talking with her helped me reflect on myself, and on the things i value. something we talked about was how much i care about achieving my goals, through hard work and determination, by the hand of moral values like honesty and integrity. moreover, she reminded me of a significant moment that i value very much. in 2020, i got covid 20 days before my last dance showcase. i’ve danced since i was three years old and competed since i was six, so dance has always been one of the most important things in my life. i went out of covid six days before my showcase, in which i was the protagonist, and i worked so hard those days to be able to present myself like i had always dreamed of. talking with ximena about this moment, and about what she believes is important to me, helped me gain more motivation and inspiration to keep going and keep achieving my goals through hard work, and integrity. after our conversation i remember feeling very grateful and blessed for my relationships, because this made me see how well my closest people know me. and i think it is important for us to have real relationships that can allow us to reflect about ourselves just as i did with ximena this week. furthermore, i am a true believer that life is better when you have people by your side; not only to create relationships based on love and appreciation, but also to enrich each other. like professor steve said “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by professor steve reifenber moreau fye week nine). the author truly emphasizes how relationships serve a greater purpose than just company. rather than that, they enrich us and broaden our perspectives as long as they are healthy and fulfilling for our soul. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing however, we should always be aware of not falling into ideological bubbles that keep us from expanding our knowledge and our intellectual growth. as paul blaschko said, “the worry seems to be that in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree, which is accelerating political polarization". (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). it is important to understand how we need to surround ourselves not only with people that agree with us, but also with people that don't. that way we can expand our knowledge and learn to respect others' opinions even when we do not agree. i am a firm believer in the importance of listening and deeply understanding others points of view. as a matter of fact, i believe that when we manage to connect with the right people and we are willing to listen to new perspectives or different opinions, it helps us build off each other's morality and growth. thus, creating healthy and real relationships, and allowing myself to expand my knowledge by interacting with people whose views differ from mine, are key components for my journey of pursuing a life well-lived. another component i believe is significant to pursuing a life well-lived, is accepting that it is okay to make mistakes. i consider that being able to accept our mistakes and failings is what makes us strong and honest, as fr. hesburgh– in whom i found inspiration in his words as well as guidance– once stated. “it's impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.”. (https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-85 81-ab9500c9ecd9 produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i have to admit, i am always trying to seek perfection and success. and yes, i know it is essential to have goals and the purpose of achieving those goals that bring success. however, as years have gone by, i’ve come to understand that it is also necessary to recognize that it is okay to fail; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 it is okay to make mistakes. life is a learning process, and we can’t learn if we don’t make mistakes. therefore, i believe we should embrace all our qualities, including our flaws, and more importantly, we should embrace all our accomplishments and all our failings and understand that in the end, those are the things that make us strong and that make us who we are. as i continue talking about my journey of pursuing a life well-lived, i need to talk about one important component that matters very much to me: having the courage to act. this is something that means a lot to me, since i’ve always wanted to make an impact in the world, whether it is big or small, i don’t want to leave this world without feeling that i did all i could, to make a difference. as dean g. marcus cole said “each of us must do what we can, wherever we are.” dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school moreau fye week twelve). this quote helped me be more aware of the power each of us have and how important it is for us to, little by little, make this world a better and more peaceful place. specifically, dean g. talked about the racial separation that leads to discrimination and violence, which is a very strong and significant topic, one that surrounds our everyday lives, and that even with many years passing, it is still present today. therefore, we should take the first steps; us, who have the resources and opportunities to make a difference, should come together to avoid racial certitude and fight to make this world a better place. as robin d’angelo stated “if you are white i urge you to take the first step — let go of your racial certitude and reach for humility.”( why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost moreau fye week ten). i’ve always tried to incorporate this mentality and act towards the greater good. i believe we should all recognize this, and come together to be the change we want to see in the world. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit another important aspect of the “good life” is following god’s path. i believe that i am made to live a life based on hope and faith. it gives us motivation and lets us live at peace. when talking about hope, i feel it's essential to emphasize its significance, specifically the importance of hope by the hand of god. hope and faith work in unison to help us understand the significance of life, and trust that god's path is indeed the right one. i feel it's important to recognize the connection between faith and hope because, through our faith, is that i'll feel deeply connected to something greater than myself, and through hope i will find motivation to seek that life i am looking for and, more importantly, true happiness. that's why i chose this quote from pope francis “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see tomorrow. "(https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_i ncludes_everyone/transcript by pope francis moreau fye week seven). hope keeps us going forward; it helps us stand back on our feet even in the worst times. it is through god that i have been able to overcome bad situations and continue going further. as aria swarr said once, but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that’s the reason how i was able to go through them and still trust in god and live with joy and gratitude.” (https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). suffering is a big part of all human beings’ lives. whether it be the loss of a loved one, a setback on an important project, an emotional or physical injury– we all have to deal with it. however, life is way more than suffering. it is about enjoyment, satisfaction and laughter with the people around us. when regarding suffering, i feel it is important for us to avoid getting side tracked and think that life revolves around overcoming https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ suffering, because it is way beyond that. that is why i’ve always focused on making sure i find the good in every day and live my life around what makes me happy. finally, what i considered to be the most valuable factor to pursue a life well-lived, is always focusing on making the best out of life like it was the last day. as stated “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). this is a powerful message, but one that reflects exactly how i want to live my life. as humans, we are aware that our time in this world will eventually come to an end. however, i think sometimes we forget what that really means. we forget to focus on the present and live for today. that is what i’ve always tried to avoid; and why i always try to live like every day was the last one. by saying this, i mean i always try to stop worrying so much and start actually living, and enjoying the beauty of life. because at the end, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the moment or not.” (https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i feel this is a significant message since it can change how someone approaches each day. furthermore, it reminds me of the significance each experience has in my life. it doesn’t matter if it’s something positive or negative; it is clear that everything has a significant impact on my life, and those experiences are what shape me into the person i’ve become. that is why i believe it is important to take a minute to slow down and realize what is in front of me and appreciate the beauty of it. sometimes we just want to accomplish so many things, and we want to work so hard that we forget to enjoy the process and the different moments. so, i feel that we can appreciate more what’s in front of us by slowing down. as pico lyer stated, it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ by pico lyer, ted moreau fye week one). this precisely represents the importance of “slowing down” or simply taking a pause. by doing this, we are allowing ourselves to see the real meaning and purpose of life, or whatever it is we are taking a minute from. we are allowing ourselves to recognize what is in front of us, and most importantly, we are giving ourselves a moment to breathe. furthermore, i think this can help me appreciate every moment, even the little ones, and motivate me to seek significant and memorable experiences throughout my life that can improve the person i’ve become and the person i want to be. everything i just mentioned, is what has shaped me into the person i've become today and what keeps me motivated to seek a life well-lived. through my upcoming years, i will keep focusing on embracing these values and living each day like if it was the last one. moreover, i’ll keep working on allowing myself to be vulnerable and accepting my weaknesses and mistakes. finally, i will keep seeking faith and religion and following my desire to live a life full of hope by the hand of god. that way, i can become someone real, authentic, and true. i'm very grateful i have the opportunity to call this university, in which love, religion, and spirit prevails, my second home. furthermore, with the motto that the university always promotes: the mind will not be cultivated at the expense of the heart, i'm certain i'll be able to educate my mind and my heart, becoming a successful and compassionate professional, and reaching that life well-lived that i’ve always wanted. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ capstone integration moreau fye catherine wagner personal responsibility for every aspect of life i, , hereby declare that i will adhere to the following principles throughout the remainder of my life. i will inspire others to do well by being a model of good citizenship and behavior. i will create loving relationships by reciprocating loyalty, honesty, love, and attention. i will improve myself daily by working on my health, my skills, my intelligence, and my attitude. i will help my community by becoming involved in service projects that use my time and talents towards a meaningful end. i will choose work projects that inspire me to be a force for good in this world (“mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). over the next three years, i plan to be a model of good citizenship and behavior by being someone that the younger kids in my dorm will look up to. in order to do this, i think that i must engage in dorm culture with enthusiasm. i will always leave my door open so that freshmen next year have someone to talk to. i plan on competing with them in section sports as well as interhall competitions to strengthen the bonds between us. in doing so, i will be actively participating in the culture of siegfried hall rather than simply saying that i’m in the hall (passion isn’t enough by npr moreau fye week eleven). i also plan to introduce myself and get to know every freshman in my dorm next year. this way, they will always have a smiling face to greet them when they see me. i plan to help them during the first few weeks especially because i know this is a really hard time being away from home and coming with no friends. personally, i felt lost for much of the beginning of the first semester, and i think that doing this will be helpful to the freshmen. in doing so, i will be practicing accompaniment and learning about them as individuals (teaching accompaniment by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). by being a helping hand to the freshman, i can help cultivate a culture of inclusion and acceptance, where individual differences are celebrated as a means of creating a richer environment (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame by du lac moreau fye week 10). in order to accomplish this, i will host weekly “office hours” at four on fridays. this was something that the older kids in my dorm did, and i think it really helped a lot of people get to know each other and share some stories from their experiences. i will create loving relationships with others over the next few years by always being proactive. instead of waiting for others to come to me, i will seek people out in order to get to know them better. during the first semester, i went to a lecture by peter kaufmann. i came away from that lecture with a few good ideas. one of these was proactivity and the principle of going positive and going first when meeting people or just interacting with them. i can’t control how someone will respond to me, but i can control my own actions. it’s important to focus on controllable things because they’re the ones we should be worried about (five minutes by the grotto moreau fye week 6) i think that this principle will also help me not stress about things that are outside of my control. when it comes to stepping up a relationship by spending time with people, i think i will adhere to the question of “what would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?” (7 clues: an interactive assessment activity meruelo center moreau fye week 4). this mindset will let me take risks, which is necessary when stepping up any relationship to the next level. i will improve myself and maintain my health through proper exercise both physically and mentally. this will involve learning new skills and developing fresh habits. one habit i intend to adopt is that of meditation. i think that this will allow me to take a break on a daily basis and just sit still. in doing so, i will make other experiences seem much fuller, and appreciate menial tasks more (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). to maintain my mental health, i plan to spend quality time with people i love. like my sister told me, i’m at my best when i’m cracking jokes with people that i fully trust (discernment conversation activity with emily moses moreau fye week five). this will also give me a break from stressful tasks and let me enjoy myself. perhaps this will take the form of facetiming with my cousins in the next three years. i think that i will engage in service over the next three years by visiting and volunteering at the south bend center for the homeless. by helping out at the south bend center, i will be giving my time up for those who aren’t as fortunate as i am, and ultimately help those that god calls his chosen (2: mission” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). i find it both personally fulfilling to help those who are in need as well as genuinely beneficial for society. animating my life with service will allow me to remain balanced as a human being. in doing so, i will also exercise the principle that “each and every everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others” in practice (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). helping others in college will be a foundation for living the rest of my life as a servant of god doing his best work (integration three by moreau fye week eight). in my work, i can pursue a degree that i believe will provide me with an opportunity for passion in my projects. i’m currently studying finance. i think my ultimate goal for my career is to become involved in venture capital, and i think that a finance degree is a good start to reach this goal. i will explore classes over the next three years that allow me to determine which fields of study that i find joy in, because these choices will ultimately shape my life over the next ten years (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). it will take courage for me to switch majors if i determine that i don’t like the field of finance. however, i think that sticking to what feels right for me will ultimately make me happier and allow me to contribute to society in the best way possible (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). ultimately, i think that living out the values described in my mission statement will lead to a fulfilling life and both personal and community improvement. to me, that is the definition of a life well lived. novak 1 how i will make the next three years worth it moreau integration assignment four to find more happiness, fulfillment, and value in my life, i will: lead a life built on integrity, fairness, good health, and help for others, a commitment to excellence and love. i will remember that my family and friends are important to me. i will learn and grow every day, doing work that offers a sense of accomplishment, contributing to my community and those less fortunate, living a balanced, healthful life, and searching for understanding and peace of mind. revere admirable characteristics in others, such as honor, compassion, tolerance, wisdom, and patience, and work to instill similar characteristics in my own life. i will work to recognize and develop my strengths as a person who is intelligent, articulate, faithful, hard-working, and insightful. i want to keep humbleness in mind by acknowledging that i can be impatient, intolerant, unsociable, reactive, careless about my health, afraid to take risks, and afraid to growand by constantly striving to transform my weaknesses into strengths. i will envision myself becoming a person my family and friends see as a good daughter, a good sister, a good friend, steadfast, loving, patient, caring, supportive, and available (“my mission statement” by – moreau fye week 13). this mission statement is what i created for myself. while it sets up the values i want to follow and the things i want to keep important to me in my life, here are some examples i plan to implement these characteristics in my next three years here at notre dame. one of the things i’ve realized this year is how busy college life is. reflecting on the art of stillness and being able to sit quietly for even a few seconds, i found to be very enriching. novak 2 i’ve even used this time to walk around the lakes and be grateful for where i am (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted – moreau f.y.e. week 1). the process has allowed me to be wiser and more faithful. furthermore, based on a conversation i had with my mom, she said that everything always works out “one way or another regardless of what i do.” she would remind me of this when i was stressed or things were unknown, which really allowed me to be more levelheaded (“conversation with mom, february 18, 2022, week 5.” – moreau f.y.e. week 5). my family has been a great support system for me since i’ve been here, especially when switching colleges within nd and majors to find something i was happier in. thanks to them, i plan to stick to political science in the next three years and give my all to a career that fills my soul with purpose. despite having the dream of commanding a boardroom in an awesome business suit, i can still find ways to do that despite not following the business route. i want to be a leader who inspires and can be relied on like my mission statement says (hesburgh,” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau f.y.e. week 2). based on the quote from the meruelo family center for career development, “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life.” i’m still struggling to be okay with this, but my goal over the next three years is to take classes and join clubs that interest me so i can better discern where and what i want to do. one of those clubs is potentially the observer, where i can look into people’s lives and gain more insight into the news around campus (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau f.y.e. week 4). i want to graduate from notre dame being excited about the future and “not suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness” novak 3 (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times – moreau f.y.e. week 3). i am beyond grateful to be able to compete for the university as an athlete. so far, i’ve already been able to travel to unique places, and i am so excited to see more of the united states in the next few years. i want to put my wisdom and tolerance to use and travel to meet new people and create new experiences. already i have met people who are different than me in more ways than one, which has allowed me to gain a fresh perspective (“teaching accompaniment” by professor steve reisenberg – moreau fye week 9). being on a new team here has taught me to deal with people who have different beliefs compared to me but regardless i am willing to work with my teammates to succeed – most of them are amazing anyway (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau f.y.e. week 7). while talking to new people, i meet some who i disagree with or say things that are plain rude towards another group of people, which at first was so shocking to me. my plan for the next three years is to have conversations with people (specifically my friends when they make jokes that are racist or homophobic) and show them how to be respectful and aware of what they are saying (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” a guide to student life – moreau f.y.e. week 10). lastly, i understand that i am not perfect and that i need to have an open mind when people question my beliefs or get mad at me for something. while it is good to stick to my morals, knowing when i am wrong is something i need to be better at handling (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau f.y.e. week 6). i generally think i am a wise person that can listen to others. still, i do find myself shielding myself from people who believe things differently than i do, which i plan to novak 4 work on in the next few years (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). one of the most important things i’ve noticed is how different people are here on campus. i love the diversity as it lets me understand better the lives of other people who have had more challenging lives than me (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week 12). for the next few years, while i am still on campus, i plan to push myself to grow and provoke difficult conversations to make our campus and the world around me a better place. i hope that people can view me as someone open-minded and able to be there for them. week 14capstone integration 3 my life in the next three years i think that everyone has a duty to themselves to be joyful in what they do. according to father michael himes, joy is “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” ("three key questions" by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). to have a sense of joy, we need to know where we are going in order to feel right about it. it is helpful for us to “step farther back and stand still [so] that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico ayer moreau fye week 1). having learned a lot about myself over the course of this year, i think that what i pursue in my next three years at notre dame can be summarized in the “motto” – if you will – of the notre dame’s domer dozen: “faith, service, learning, [and] work” (review the recent and previous honorees of the notre dame alumni association's "domer dozen" by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 2). i have come a long way this year in my personal faith. in fact, most of my modest development in my faith has come in the recent weeks and months. i have begun attending mass with my friends in order for us to form a bond together through god, something that can deepen and add meaning to any relationship. i have taken some lessons away from my time in the chapels of keenan, o’neill and siegfried halls. one is that talking to god is a must, as evidenced by jacob walsh’s story where he learned that “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” ("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). other than embracing god, another thing that mass has taught me is the importance of embracing each other, which is also emphasized by the congregation of holy cross: “our mutual respect and shared undertaking should be a hopeful sign of the kingdom, and they are when others can behold how we love one another” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week 12). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736/download?download_frd=1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ looking ahead, i will use my next three years to grow closer to god as i move into adulthood, for there is no relationship more important than the one with the lord. examining the “service” aspect of the alumni association’s morals, this is something that i began to learn last summer. i had always considered myself on the more selfish side of people, but i think that wherever i stand now, i have moved significantly in the direction of generosity and caring. i have learned that “you may ask for assistance, but you can also provide assistance to others” (https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edi t by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 5). helping is just as important as being helped. witnessing steven reifenberg’s experiences in chile with being cared for, in which he explained that the people there “cared for [him] with incredible grace” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steven reifenberg moreau fye week 9). being kind, caring and encouraging is free, and that is something i have started to realize over the past year. in my year with the notre dame swimming and diving team, i have had a lot of opportunities to help and uplift my teammates, and i would say that, moving forward, i can do an even better job of that. learning is immensely important to me. luckily, i was blessed enough to come to notre dame which “fosters the development in its students of those disciplined habits of mind, body, and spirit” (https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 13). i believe that these four years are all about learning, although not just in the formal classroom setting. personal growth is necessary in college as well. part of what we have to discover about ourselves is “why we are the way we are” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by teded moreau fye week 6). as i have already talked about, my personal growth this year has been substantial, and undoubtedly i will have a lot more growth throughout the rest of my time here at notre dame. my friends are extremely important in all of this, as “they're there to serve [our] own emotional and intellectual needs” (“passion isn’t https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). in relation to friendships, something i have learned here is that we must “surround [ourselves] with people who make [us] happy.” (https://docs.google.com/document/d/15gxc3fipizkotw5blnwntfgcqylnrfilcvoidzxvu-g/ edit by moreau fye week 8). moving lastly toward work, i diverge from many people in that oftentimes i enjoy work. it makes me happy to be extremely productive, likely because that allows me to have free time to do whatever i choose. striking that balance is key to “happiness, [which] can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). if i am the whole, every part of me working together is a very exhilarating experience. staying focused enough to work harmoniously is my biggest challenge, and that will be something i have to work on throughout the rest of my time at notre dame. in conclusion, knowing that “these steps – [growing my faith, improving at serving others, growing my knowledge of the world around me, and learning how to be a more efficient worker] – don’t take place in a nice, neat order” (https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 4), i have to treat every day like another chance to become a better version of myself. if we wake up every day trying to be better than the day before, our lives will be filled with purpose, happiness and fulfillment. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/15gxc3fipizkotw5blnwntfgcqylnrfilcvoidzxvu-g/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/15gxc3fipizkotw5blnwntfgcqylnrfilcvoidzxvu-g/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ yuhan’s life: internal growth over external gain sister aletheia once said, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of life.” (“meet the nun who wants to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three) 1 this is true for everyone, but different people have different definitions for a well-lived life. for yuhan, a well-lived life includes growth, happiness, and contributions to communities around her. yuhan always stayed curious and never stopped on her way of acquisition of new knowledge. she believed that curiosity and constant learning were important for her to grow into a more capable and multi-faceted person, and she was always ready for new experiences and adventures. growing up, she learned to speak four languages. she earned a double degree in college. she was familiar with different types of sports, such as swimming, table tennis, and badminton. she travelled to more than thirty countries in her life. she was a big fan of museums and musical, and she learned to develop an aesthetic capacity through such encounter with art. the north star in her life is learning from new experiences and interacting with new people from different backgrounds. through the process, she understood herself better and made sense of who she wanted to become and how she would get there. such 1 nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html experiences enabled both external and internal growth and carried throughout her life. “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor.” (“discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five)2 she developed and strengthened new skills and gained new perspectives as she expanded her potential. even when she turned old, she kept herself updated with the latest technologies: she could skillfully and flawlessly control operate a self-driving car and use an iphone 100. you frequently saw yuhan smiling. for her, happiness was one of her core pursuits. she was observant and appreciated the small details of beauty of life, whether it is birds chirping during her walk around the garden in the early morning or flowers that started to bloom after a long winter. she had an optimistic mind, which enabled her to see things through bright sides, even if she was faced with difficult challenges. yuhan also enjoyed bringing happiness to people around her. the time people spent with her was never boring; her sense of humor and quirky remarks never failed to make cheerful conversations. her homophonic, cross-disciplinary, and multilingual jokes could easily make someone’s day. she was also an excellent listener and companion: you could rely on her if you need some advice about making a big decision or simply need a shoulder to cry on. most of us, oftentimes, do not know with 100% what our lives are for. for many, they follow the general trend of the society: go to school, earn an undergraduate degree, find 2 docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit a job, establish a family, get promoted a few times, raise the future generations, rest in peace. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one)3 as we look back on yuhan’s life, one of the most important goals she wanted to achieve in her life was to make a positive impact for people and around communities around her. when she was a little girl, she also used to experience confusion about how she wanted her life to be. she tried to come up with insights——“an intuitive understanding of herself” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six)4. she did not blindly follow what the majority people around her were doing. through actively exposing herself to resources and engaging in diverse activities, such as volunteer work, internship, and research, she became more and more clearly aware of her “values, interests, personalities, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four)5 and started to realize that what she wanted was not a worldly success defined by good-looking titles and amounts of money, but creating a positive impact to people and communities around her. we are not alone in the society. our life is closely related to other people, and their life 3 ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ 4 ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ 5 undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ is inseparable from ours. like pope francis said, “let us help each other, altogether, to remember that the ‘other’ is not a statistic or a number. we all need each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven)6 the goals of yuhan’s life were not limited to personal achievements but were more beyond: making a difference to the society. when she was young, she actively devoted her efforts to volunteer work, from teaching elderly people how to use smartphones to make phone calls and view texts to delivering food to homeless people. she worked closely with underrepresented groups and communities, applying her knowledge and skills to make changes in local communities. she did not rest when she turned old: she advocated for attention and care given to elderly people who were prone to be neglected by the society and organized care-giving groups paring up teenage volunteers and elderly people. she developed the capacity to “talk across differences, create trust, and create mutual understanding.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two)7. looking back on her life, yuhan would say that she lived her life well. she found the meaning of life in new encounters and challenges out of her comfort zones, joyful and meaningful interactions with friends and family, and contributions to people and communities around her. she enjoyed her life, and people around her enjoyed her being with us. 6 ted.com/talks/his_holiness_popoe_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript 7 notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 yuhan has passed away, but memories of her stay in us. she will be missed, and she will be remembered as a dear family member, companion, and friend. nicholas langan professor chan moreau fye 28 april 2022 the origin and future of my mission moreau this semester has forced me to think about what i want to do with my life by making me create a personal mission statement. the mission statement that i came up with and am planning to stick by is: in my next 3 years at the university of notre dame and beyond, i will strive to help those less fortunate than me by using the many different resources at my disposal. i plan to work for a local habitat for humanity chapter as well as partake in urban plunges into the south bend community. i will do this because i believe that everyone deserves the same opportunities in life and it is my responsibility to help ensure that this is true. this mission statement was inspired by all of the experiences i have had in my life as well as the different weeks of moreau this semester. when i was first attempting to think of my mission statement, i saw it as a somewhat daunting task. then, i thought back to my first week of moreau this year when i learned that “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this quote showed me that i need to sit back and really think about all the things that i have experienced in life and carefully examine what this says about me and what i think i should work to do in the future. once i had an idea about what i wanted to try and do, i hit the roadblock of how i was supposed to accomplish such a thing. to help me get around this problem, i went back to my week 2 moreau writing and i found a great quote from someone at the university of notre dame named matt conaghan who figured out a way to use his specialty and field of expertise to help others. in a quote from the notre https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ dame website, it states that “conaghan leads the conception, creation, and promotion of marketing materials while also focusing on design and charity growth” ( domer dozen quote by matt conaghan moreau fye week 2). i realized that matt was using his major and his skill set to grow himself and help those around him that needed it most, something that i realized i could also accomplish. at this point, i was considering whether this was a life that i wanted to live. i understood that it was good to help others, but would i really find joy in my actions? this got me thinking about what joy really was. i knew it was not the exact same thing as happiness because it was deeper than that, but i could not really put a definition to it. luckily, in week 3 of moreau i remembered that i found an exact definition of joy. this source said that joy was “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (three key question by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). after reading this, i realized that if i believed that what i was doing in life was the right thing to do by others, i would find joy. i certainly believe that helping others is acting in a correct way, so i therefore will find joy in helping others. now i knew that i wanted to help people through whatever i decided to do, but how was i to decide what to do? i was stuck. i was not sure how to figure out what i would enjoy doing in the future. then i found a website that said “you have to know yourself first – your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) – before you can make effective career choices” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). this made a lot of sense to me. before making such an important decision in my life, it is important to really understand myself and what i value. i can only make a decision that is best for me if i know what i value and what i am good at. part of knowing who you are is what other people think about you. people you know, especially those that are close to you like your family, know you almost as well as you know yourself. they can tell you what you are good at and what you are not. they are a completely unbiased source that will tell you the truth about yourself, sometimes truths that you don’t want to admit. talking to those close to you will help you to learn even more about yourself and understand yourself in a way that will help you make decisions that are most beneficial for yourself and others. for example, in week 5 of moreau, we were https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ tasked with having one of these conversations. in this conversation, my sister told me that she thought that i valued helping others most, which helped me create my mission statement that will guide me through the rest of my life, especially the next three years. once i knew that i needed to incorporate helping others into this mission statement, i just had to figure out in what way i was going to do that. although using other people to learn about yourself is important, there is definitely the need to take time to think by yourself. the only problem is, i am so busy during the day that i struggle to find time to really self-reflect. this began to stress me out because i had no time to learn about myself, but then i came across a source in week 6 of moreau that said, “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have.” (yes there's a wrong way by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this completely changed the game for me. this made me realize that i did not need a large amount of time to self-reflect because if i take too much time, i may start to overthink things. taking only a little amount of time to self-reflect is perfect because it makes me think about only the most important things. after doing this, it made creating a mission statement easier because it made what i want to do much clearer. i realized that in the coming years of my life, i wanted to do all i could to help others while continuing to better myself through education and through being kind to others. at this point in my consideration of my future, i realized that i would need other people to help me along the way. but how would i know who and how many people i should have there to help me? i know that at this point in my life, i have a solid group of people around me, but should i be expanding this group of people? i ended up running across a quote from pope francis that really helped me figure out what to make of this situation. the quote stated that we need to “remember that the ‘other’ is not a statistic, or a number” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7). after reading this, i was a little astonished that i had not realized this before. everyone on this earth is equal to the other, so why not develop a relationship with everyone? sure, the strength of each relationship won’t be the same, but there is not a person on this earth that i should disregard or not try to make a relationship with. this clarified that in my future as i strive to achieve my https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript mission statement, i should continue to try and create a relationship with everyone i meet as it may further me along my journey and allow me to gain the input and ideas of all different types of people. these relationships that i would form would help me answer the next question i had about my future. i thought to myself, would if i set all of these goals and aspirations and end up failing all of the people that i set out to help? the answer to this question is truly beautiful. all of these people that i am going to help will be there to help me when i need it most. they will be there to support me in my hardest times because i was there for them. a great example of this comment was a quote from our week 9 source stating, “the people i had so earnestly come to serve (and whose lives i had imagined transforming) had to take care of me” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey today by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). this professor talked about when he found himself in a tough situation in life, all of the people that he had helped up to that point in his life came to his aid and helped him. so, in a way, he did slightly fail on his goals, but instead of turning the other way, all of the people in his life that he had helped rushed to his aid. i realized that in the future, if i were to fail in some way at helping those who needed it or ended up in a bad situation myself, all the people that i had helped at one point would be ready and willing to come to my aid. this prospect allowed me to look towards my future at notre dame and beyond without fear of failure. at this point, i knew that i wanted to help others, but i did not have a guiding principle that could help guide me along the way. to find this principle that would help lead me and my endeavors to live a life well-lived, i turned to week 10 of moreau. in week 10, we took time to really find a principle or idea that would guide our future adventures. as a very religious person, i naturally gravitated towards the golden rule which states that we should “treat others as we desire to be treated” (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame, du lac – moreau fye week 10). this principle played perfectly into everything i had already determined up to that point. by treating others in a respectful way, i would be able to create valuable relationships in the future and i would be inspired to help others because i would want them to do the same thing to me. i realized that by following the word of god and treating everyone as i would want to be treated, i would be well on my way to living a life well-lived. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ after all of this deliberation, i felt like i was in a good spot. i realized that i knew what i needed to do to put myself on a path to live a life well-lived. there were only a few details that i needed to work out. one of the most important details was figuring out what type of environment i needed to put myself in to ensure that i could continue to grow in the future and could carry out this service to others that i wanted to. while i contemplated this, i came across a reading that talked about the importance of avoiding something called an echo chamber. an echo chamber is “a social structure from which relative voices have been actively discredited.” (how to avoid an echo chamber by paul blaschko moreau week 11). if i were to put myself in a situation where i was in an echo chamber, i would not be able to freely develop my opinions and ideas to be my own. instead, i would be forced to believe in the same things as those around me for fear of being cast out for disagreeing. in order to live a life well-lived in the future, i need to be able to freely think and change my views as i learn. after reading this, i realized just how imperative it is that i avoid this situation at all costs. i need to maintain my freedom of thought and speech so that i can learn and adapt to the ever-changing world without being stuck in one mindset. now that i know what i would like to do in life, how do i gather the courage to accomplish my goals? unlike some people in this world, i am lucky to go to one of the best universities in the country that provides me with endless resources. a great example of these resources at work comes from week 12 of moreau where i read an article that said, “today, notre dame law school equips lawyers from all around the world with the training and tools they need to fight for human rights.” (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). this great university that i am at has so many different resources that i can use to accomplish my goal of helping others. this is where my specific examples in my mission statement come from. i realize that i can participate in things such as habitat for humanity and urban plunge here at notre dame to begin to make a difference in my community. these two service programs are only the start. i will continue to explore different ways in which i can start to help those around me who need it most in order to find myself living a life well-lived. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ in this semester of moreau, i discovered what living a life well-lived really means to me. it means going out into the world and helping those in need in every way possible using all of the resources at my disposal. this semester of moreau has taught me that i need to go out of my way to help others and not be selfish in my actions. i need to create a community around me that can rely on me and that i can rely on. at the end of the day, i think that this is what a life well-lived comes out to. if everyone around me knows that they can rely on me for help and i know that i can be picked up in my lowest times by those around me, i truly believe that i would be living a life well-lived. 1 mr. comuniello moreau fye-capstone integration 29 aril 2022 don’t stop believing: my journey to a life well-lived my parents have always told me to follow my dreams. they taught me that as long as i am happy with my life and the decisions i made, they would support me and love me through it all. i have been raised in a world surrounded by faith, hope, and love, and i want to carry that forward. i have learned to lead, to listen. to be kind, to care, to be passionate about the things i love. to be independentsomething i have always been good at. i plan to live a life well lived through the choices i make, the relationships i forge, and through my pursuit of happiness in all aspects, focusing on, as sister aletheia mentioned, “where am i headed [and] where i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die”, nyt, moreau fye week 3). my time at notre dame will be full of moments of joy, moments, of failure, and moments to learn. the classes i take will challenge me academically and the rigor of the classroom will prepare me as i venture toward my future career plan of going to medical school and becoming a doctor. here, i will be able to help others in the way i have always felt called to do (my mission statement, developing a mission, moreau fye, week 13). the merulo family center for career development offers so many opportunities to explore this, but they also offer a lot of advice to undergraduates, one being “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you,’” which i think i have found (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). i have landed the biological sciences major with a minor in bioengineering to encompass everything. my biology classes at notre dame have been going well, and i am going to start volunteering at memorial hospital if i stay in south bend this summer. i am also going to volunteer as a counselor at camp kesem in august. it is a summer program for kids whose parents or family members have been impacted by cancer. i am excited to get this opportunity to be a leader but to also help people when they need it most. to listen, to bring joy to their lives. and once i graduate from undergrad and medical school, i want a job in the hospital system, because to me, it is there where i can make the most impact with my skills. another opportunity could arise in going on a medical service trip such as doctors without borders. with all my knowledge and education, there will be so many opportunities out there for me to continually push myself to learn more, to experience more, to be more. furthermore, the people i meet and the clubs i join at nd are there to push me physically, but they are also there for me mentally, spiritually, and emotionally. they are the kind of people that you can sit down and have an honest conversation with, about your future, about life (“discernment conversation,” moreau fye week 5). beyond the amazing community, i want to take advantage of all the wonderful opportunities notre dame has to offer to make the most out of my time and to create the best version of myself as i venture into the unknown. pico iyer said in his ted article, “in the end, all journeys have to bring us home (pico iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives, moreau fye week 1). so far, i have found two clubs to call home. the women’s water polo team has taken me in even though i had never played water polo before until the start of this year. each and every woman on the team challenges me to be the best version of myself, and it makes me happy to be around them and be part of a team, something greater than myself. i have also joined the club coordination council, a branch of student government that allows me to make a difference here at notre dame. i get to work with every club to make sure they get to put on all the events that make the notre dame community what it is, and it is something i have cherished being a part of. beyond what i have already done, i plan to study abroad my junior year and use notre dame’s many career services and job boards to get myself an internship or find research opportunities in the biomedical field that will help me explore my passions and give me experience before i venture off to medical school, because asking ‘“what’ questions help us create a better future” (tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way),” ted, moreau fye week 6). switching gears, family has always been near and dear to my heart. my life will not be one well lived if i don’t have people to share it with, because as pope francis exclaimed “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (pope francis, “why the only future worth building includes everyone,” ted conference, moreau fye, week 7). for me, it is my parents, my brothers, my sisters. i want to stay close to the people who made me who i am, because out of everything i have ever been blessed with, they mean the most to me. some advice i got from a teacher of mine in high school was to call you parents at least once a week so they know you are okay. i have taken that to heart here at notre dame. i facetime them every sunday night at 8:00 right before cav mass. i get to see them, tell them about everything that happened to me, because there is no one i would rather talk to. to stay close with them in the future, i will still call them whenever i want to talk or catch up, even if i am hundreds of miles away. not only that, but i also want a family of my own. a loving husband, beautiful children. people i can share my experiences, my sorrows, my laughter, my passions. i want to show them the world and how to be good stewards in it, because as professor reifenberg states, “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more” (professor reifenberg, “teaching accompaniment, a learning journey together,” moreau fye, week 9). i studied abroad in spain sophomore year of high school and met so many new and wonderful people, but i never got to travel or experience this with my family growing up. i plan to take my own family on the adventures i had dreamed about as a girl. traveling the world and sightseeing has always been a passion of mine, and who better to share it with than my family? i also want to teach them to care about others, to be kind in the way my parents taught me, because i think that is something they got right. i want them to have dreams, and i want to be there to support them in every which way. be their own personal cheerleader. my parents have always done that for meencouraged me to dream about what would make me happy, because as fr. hesburgh said, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if it doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh”, moreau fye week 2). lastly, i want to teach them how to listen to others, to their stories, as there is so much we still need to learn about loving one another so we can love ourselves, which mr. walsh echoed in his article (jacob walsh, “growing up gay and catholic,” moreau fye, week 10). and in doing so, i can keep learning myself, because having the passion and desire for it is not enough (npr, “passion isn’t enough (hidden brain media),” moreau fye, week 11). i have always taken pride in my love of learning and want to pass that on to all the people i meet in my life, because to me that is a life well lived (my eulogy, defining a life well lived, moreau fye, week 8). show them there is something more, that there is still hope for a better world, a better us if we take the time to communicate with each other rather than fear each other as dean g. marcus cole stressed in his article (dean g. marcus cole, “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something,” moreau fye, week 12). capstone integration pedro augusto bolsonaro capstone integration moreau first-year experience pedro augusto leone bolsonaro life after notre dame: dissecting my mission statement as my time as a first-year student comes to an end, time is ripe to look back and reflect on my experiences at south bend this past year. i remember that when i first landed in indiana, i visualized the future with overwhelming excitement but also a smear of disorientation and anxiousness. ever since, i have leveraged my classes and professional and campus-related activities to clear the mist of uncertainty. in week 13 of the moreau first-year experience, i brainstormed and condensed all these considerations into a three-sentence mission statement that encapsulates how i want to orient my life, not only personally, but also professionally and spiritually. in this capstone integration, i will dissect my mission statement by reflecting on the questions proposed by the capstone orientation with insights from the content covered throughout the semester. the mission statement will then serve as an objective that i aim for not only for the next three years at notre dame, but also my entire life. my mission statement reads as follows: “highly-motivated, curious, and creative problem-solver. strongly believes in the importance of family, genuine friendships, and fostering a close relationship to god to live a good life. to be successful is first-and-foremost to achieve intrinsic happiness.” “does my mission statement accurately and totally describe how i want to orient my life?” the mission statement was the outcome of a long process of deep introspection, particularly into finding the things in life i valued the most. it was particularly hard to decelerate from the hectic pace brought about by school, far-away family, internship application, social life, relationships; take a step back and look at the person i want to become. as pico iyer argues in his essay, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the bigger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this period of meditation taken to derive an all-encompassing mission statement has helped me accurately discern the way in which i want to orient myself. to achieve the end-product of my mission statement called for inspiration from not only key introspective questions, but also those who pursued and lived a life well-lived. in week 2 of the course, we looked at examples of individuals who were bold in their perception of what is right and put themselves at the service of others. i was particularly fascinated by the story of matt conaghan, a notre dame alumni who, driven by the values cultivated here at south bend, now leads an ngo that helps charities grow by harnessing the power of spare change https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144072 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144072 (“gallery: notre dame alumni association’s “domer dozen” by young alumni recognition initiative moreau fye week 2). his story inspired me to go out and kickstart my own organization, the brazilian student association at notre dame, to promote brazilian culture on campus and advance my fellow brazilian student’s professional aspirations. finally, i used the content from week 3 of the course, where we discerned our professional aspirations by pondering on critical questions such as “is this a source of joy?” and “is this something that taps into your talents and gifts?” (“three key questions” by father micheal himes moreau fye week 3). these questions made me realize that it is not any particular occupation that will magically make me happy. as long as i am putting myself at the service of others and my work yields positive fruits for society, then i will find happiness in doing it. this is reflected in my mission statement when i say, “to be successful is first and foremost to achieve intrinsic happiness”. later on in the semester, we were called upon to write an eulogy, envisioning ourselves in the future looking back at our accomplishments and the way we lived our life. this activity was particularly enlightening though quite frightening because i could just picture myself at the deathbed, looking back and visualizing what my life was like. although it is difficult to predict what the future holds, it is a worthy exercise to see if the conception i hold of a life well-live will be enough to warrant passing away at ease with what i achieved throughout my life. as i stated in my eulogy in week 8, “i know that the only way of finding out is taking life head-on and courageously navigating its uncertainty so that when you lay on your deathbed you can look back and reminisce about your life well-lived”. this way, through trial-and-error, i am able to tinker with my mission statement by pushing it forward in time and seeing if the things i stated would make for a satisfactory life. how would others be able to see my mission in action? first and foremost, it is important to make the distinction between others being able to see my mission in action, and how much i care about the opinion and views of others upon my actions. i believe that you should do whatever makes you happy, regardless of the opinion of others. if you live the life that other people want you to live, you will never maximize your potential. in week 10 of the course, we learned through the powerful story of jacob walsh, who grew up constrained, afraid and ashamed of his homosexuality. after he embraced god’s love, decided to love himself for who he was, and refused to hear anyone that judged him, his life was reinvented (“growing up and gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). although jacob’s internal struggle is far more complex and difficult than my own, there is value to extract from his experiences and his story. one should embrace themselves for who they are, and refuse to let others tell them otherwise. this applies to your personal construction as a human being in every sense; from your relationships with your co-workers in a professional environment to the https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 our closest friends. another way of knowing how other people are looking at your mission is to simply talk to them. we practiced a crucial activity in talking to important people in your life to get their insight on ourselves (“week 5 discernment conversation activity” by notre dame moreau fye week 5). often, an honest outside perspective on our actions is invaluable to our development as human beings. i practiced this activity with my girlfriend who knows more about me than anyone else on campus. this was an eye-opening experience as it really highlighted features of my personality that i had not noticed how visible it was. it made me realize how much others perceive me and how much of that is reflected in my mission statement. finally, in week 7, we focused on how to incorporate others into our idea of a life well-lived. it got me thinking about how to leverage my notre dame education and the professional opportunities that i will strive for in order to put myself at the service of others. the content of this week was extremely insightful, particularly as we got to listen to pope francis’ teachings on his vision for the future. his holiness placed a lot of emphasis on the prioritization of others, particularly those most vulnerable. he also mentioned the concept of power which i interpreted as the power of education, money, wisdom, and consciousness. he warns that power, when in the wrong hands, is capable of making you go greedy, egotistical, and capable of pushing and harming others for your own benefit. however, as he says, “through humility and concrete love, [...] power – the highest, the strongest one – becomes a service, a force for good.” this is what i am striving to achieve. i hope that my education here at notre dame will empower me to pursue my passions and secure a good financial future for myself and my family. however, what will determine my success will not be the digits on my bank account or the professional connections i made throughout my years, but rather the people i helped along the way and the good service that my work has brought about. i wish to harness the intellectual power into a machine for love and goodness, which i hope will be looked upon positively by those around me. when will it be most difficult to live this mission? when things are easy and life is on track, it is very simple to live by the mission statement we have constructed. it is under bleak situations that our commitment to the mission statement is tested. we tend to isolate ourselves from loved ones, question and challenge the authority of god, and doubt our own abilities. in week 6 of the course, we considered some obstacles that will challenge our mission and our idea of a life well-lived. it is important to build mechanisms that, in times of turbulence, prevents us from drifting away from our dearest values and objectives. for example, a skill i have developed through the course is to take a 5-minute break in order to strengthen my mindfulness and allow me to escape the heat of the moment to avoid making rash decisions (“mindfulness menu” by notre dame’s mcdonald center moreau fye week 6). another example is my agreement with my mom that whenever i feel too stressed by school, work, or personal difficulties, i hop on a call with her and she refuses to hang up until i https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view calm down. this is an important activity i have noticed that helps we always look at the bigger picture, and be appreciative of all the blessings god has bestowed upon myself and my loved ones. this makes me face the hardest of challenges with optimism and confidence. however, there are some difficulties that challenge my mission statement that springs from without; events in our community or across the world that makes our mission look trivial when placed in context. in week 12 of the course, we read law school dean marcus cole’s powerful article on the brutal death of george floyd (“‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). this experience galvanized me to get more involved with underrepresented communities on campus to understand more about the struggles of living as a minority. i got particularly engaged with the latino community, where i felt included and we shared our difficulties of living far away from our native environment. i hope to continue solidifying my bonds with the latino community throughout the next three years on campus to advance my mission of “fostering genuine friendships” by sharing experiences and promoting constructive dialogue. along those same lines, in week 9 of the course, we tackled the issue of suffering, straining particularly the connection between faith and misery. with abundant suffering in the world, both within our community (homeless in south bend) and throughout the world (ukrainian refugees), our efforts to make the world a better place seems almost futile. just like professor reifenberg explained the challenges of his trip to chile geared towards improving the lives of at-risk children, i want to escape my comfort zone and help in any way possible the people who most suffer in this world (“teaching accompaniment a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). this aspect of my personality is reflected in the first sentence of my mission statement, where i wrote, “highly-motivated, curious, and creative problem-solver”. these three characteristics are essential features i constantly work on to improve in order to apply them in the real world, both to my own professional aspirations and my desire to help others, particularly those especially in need. how might my mission be strengthened, challenged, or changed by my remaining time as a notre dame student? as i very well understand, to believe this mission statement is an immutable, all-righteous set of guidelines to follow is an imprudent thought. my view on the world and myself has changed dramatically from what it was five years ago and will certainly be different five years from now. i must be conscious and witful enough to understand how to build on my mission in a constructive way, and further clarify what a life well-lived actually means to me. as i continue to discover myself, i want to open myself to new perspectives and really prioritize the incorporation of others into my mission as that is an aspect of myself i see bring out a lot of joy. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit as we discussed in week 4 of the course, one’s professional career is one of the most important decisions one can make. it will be what we will commit most of our time for decades to come, and to get it exactly right is a task that few accomplish. but still, there is a very severe misconception we discussed thoroughly in class, that whatever we study at university will determine our occupation for the rest of our lives. this is also acknowledged in the undergraduate career services notre dame webpage, where they explore the major-deciding process, “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life.” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). i know that this is not true because both my parents work in areas they had absolutely no contact with while at school. my mother, who studied communications, now heads a small-business textile company in brazil. my father, a mechanical engineer by trade, is now owner and principal of a technology school in brazil. nevertheless, it was very important to hold this discussion and see what my peers thought about what a meaningful career meant for them and how i could assimilate some of their perspectives into my own judgment. another critical way to be challenged, strengthened or changed in my remaining time as a notre dame student is to allow myself and my ideas to be constructively criticized by others. notre dame (and the united states as a whole) is living a period of extreme political and cultural polarization, sparked particularly by devastating events that have happened in the past few years. especially in these bleak times, to grow in wisdom and bridge the gap between our polar differences we must first and foremost actively try to escape my echo chamber of information. an echo chamber is detrimental to intellectual and personal growth because, as professor paul blaschko explains, “in surrounding ourselves with people we agree with, we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree.” (“big questions, part 2: how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd moreau fye week 11). this leads to a severe detachment from the state of our reality, which is inherently diverse in ideas and nature, and drifts our society further apart. to grow in wisdom we must allow our ideas to be challenged, and to grow as a person we must allow ourselves to be criticized. as i stated in my mission statement, “strongly believes in the importance of family, genuine friendships, and fostering a close relationship to god to live a good life,” i believe that family and genuine friendships are bastions of trustworthiness, especially when it comes to constructive criticism and wanting you to become the best version of yourself. word count: 2561 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s capstone integration moreau fye 2 fr. keven sandberg moreau fye ii april 2, 2022 selflessness in leadership change is something i find to be always spoken but never occurring. what i mean by this is that in order for progress to be made, there needs to be change. and i do admit that we as human beings realize this, but there is seemingly never any action made. the change is always a sort of “pipe dream” that we talk about but never “walk” about. it is for these exact reasons that leadership is required. good leaders can really bring about this type of change. examples of these leaders include martin luther king jr, gandhi, albert einstein, etc. and what they all had in common was , reflection, self-awareness, and discipline to take the idea of a change, and transform it into a reality. they are all examples of reflective leaders that i strive to emulate in my day to day life. i believe that in order to be a reflective leader who strives for social change, you need to be able to discern independently and try to figure out exactly what you want in your character that you believe will create an impact for change. in week 3, fr. michael himes talks about structuring discernment into 3 questions: “is this a source of joy? is there something that taps into your talents? is the role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” (himes). these three questions play a heavy role in discerning reflective leadership and making a change. just like in week 4, in order for someone to make a change and to express independence, they need to have an “elusive quality we call presence” (daloz, 133). reflective leadership is mostly about reflecting on who you are as a person and where you stand in the important matters of life. although thinking independently in order to become an influential reflective leader is something to strive towards, this level of success will always be paired with several challenges. i have definitely learned this the hard way this semester. i have had weeks where things just have not gone my way. this major realization that i have had this semester about life being just a huge challenge has allowed me to develop different ways to carry me through my challenges. one of the most helpful traits i have developed involve the idea of embracing every challenge that is thrown at me and allowing myself to look at the bigger picture. i seriously think that this is a trait that reflective leaders should all possess. if reflective leaders were to allow challenges to weigh them down, then they wouldn’t be the best leaders! if i let every challenge bother me or then my life would be way more challenging than it already is. another trait i noticed helps me get through challenges is asking myself how to get over it and what i can do about it. like eurich said in week 6, “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (eurich). this quote by eurich encapsulates what it means to embrace the struggles and the challenges of life. this trait is what i feel can help me drive to reflective leadership for social change. alongside this idea of overcoming challenges is something that popped straight into my mind when i heard the words reflective leadership. in week 7 of this semester, we read about the dichotomy between super intelligent people and success. deresiewicz in the reading in week 7 writes “that is exactly what places like yale mean when they talk about training leaders. educating people who make a big name for themselves in the world, people with impressive titles. people who make it to the top, people who can climb the greasy pole of whatever hierarchy they decide to attach themselves to” (deresiewicz, 2). people immediately assume that intelligent people are leaders. i disagree. i believe that leaders need to be people who care about others and are reflective of themselves. leaders need to be willing to make a change. so many of these yale students deresiewicz writes about are only brains. they don’t have the willpower to lead. they don’t have the sociability to reflect on others. in my opinion, reflective leadership is about others, not yourself. this idea of others and not yourself segways perfectly into the discussion topic of week 9 this semester. like i said, i believe that reflective leadership for social change is about the whole and not just the individual. like reifenberg writes in week 9, “we’re in this together” (reifenberg, 5). in order to be a good accompagnateur, one needs to completely forget about themselves. i also believe that in order for someone to be a good reflective leader, they need to forget completely about themselves and worry primarily on others and on the change they are striving towards making. we as humans are all in this together. an example of something i believe needs major change is the progress our country has made on racism and equality. although we have come a long way, there is still so much that needs to be done. although not all of us can become reflective leaders, we can individually do our own thing in order to create a ripple effect in this larger idea of social change. like i read about in week 12, when one does nothing, they are allowing for that thing to be ok. like father massingale said in week 12 on the topic of racism in the catholic church, “when white people say nothing, they’re basically saying that it’s ok to be racist” (fr. massingale). this applies to anything in life. if we want social change, we need to be proactive. we can’t just sit back because then it will allow for change to never occur. in this first year at notre dame, things have absolutely been challenging. through the struggles and hardships, i have realized one definitive purpose in my path of life. although i am a pre-med student who is aiming to be a doctor, my one goal in life is simply to help people. my fuller vision of life that is evolving as i pursue my education is that i simply want to be there for others. i want to be a reflective leader and strive for the social change of togetherness and community. i feel that if i am there for others and i help others, i will not only feel fulfilled, but i will be making a change. and without change, there cannot be progress. although it will be difficult, i have adopted a motto: enjoy the journey, embrace the struggles, reap the benefits, and ultimately and utmostly, trust in god! moreau capstone integration andy de la garza 4/29/2022 mapping out a fulfilling life throughout the semester, we have explored the characteristics that have helped others create a fulfilling life for themselves. by looking at these traits, i feel that i have been able to create an outline for the life that i would like to live and be remembered for. through finding peace in my education, becoming an informed member of society, and working to improve the world, i hope to grow into a more complete individual who can look back on his life and be proud. as a young college student, one question sits in the forefront of my mind at all times: what will my future look like? this question can be interpreted in many ways, but at this moment, i see it as an uncertainty regarding my future career and work life. whenever i express this uncertainty to my family members, i receive a similar response: “you’re young, you have your whole life ahead of you to figure out what you want to do.” while i appreciate the thoughtfulness of my family members and the support they offer, this response is not one that changes my doubts or stress. however, through reading this semester’s sources, i feel that i have found a few ways to better handle my anxiety regarding my future. after reading fr. micheal himes’ “three questions,” i discovered a question that particularly piqued my interest: “is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible?” (“three questions” by fr. micheal himes moreau fye week three). i found this question particularly interesting because it altered my view of what a college education can be. reading himes’ question, i realized that i did not arrive at the university of notre dame with no prior experience. in fact, i arrived with many talents and abilities that i have https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 now had the opportunity to improve, such as my writing. having always enjoyed writing in middle and high school, having the opportunity to take college-level english courses that challenged me has allowed me to improve my writing practices. while these courses have not given me a clear answer for a future career, i feel guided by my abilities that i had prior to attending college. oftentimes when i am concerned about my future career, i also find myself questioning my choice in majors. currently a business analytics and english double major, i have found myself wondering if these education paths will lead me to a job i want. however, through reading from the merulo family center for career development, i realized an important fact: “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). while there is often ample pressure on students to pick a major and courses to fulfill such requirements, this quote reminds me that my majors will not put me into a box in my future. instead, i should look at my future degrees as a gateway into more opportunities in my future that i would not otherwise have. while it can be difficult to envision the role that a major plays in one’s future, i am trying to relieve myself from the unnecessary pressure of selecting the “perfect” major and course plan. as valuable as resources such as the career center and academic advisors are to finding one's academic path, i have also realized the value of reaching out to friends for guidance. after interviewing a close college friend, he revealed his interpretation of my career uncertainties: “as scary as it might be for you to pursue a career as a writer, i don’t think you’ll be satisfied until you take that risk” (“week five discernment conversation activity” by noah korth moreau fye week five). hearing his outlook on me and my goals made me realize that i had been https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit subconsciously projecting my dreams onto others while personally denying them. while i am uncertain what a career in writing could look like for me, this conversation helped me realize that in order to feel that i have had a life well lived, i will need to pursue this dream in some capacity. this realization was further emphasized through the eulogy integration. as i began to think about a legacy i would leave behind, it became clear to me that i wanted to be remembered in some capacity through my writing: “through reading his works for many years, it was never a doubt to me that he had a passion for writing.” (“integration three” by andy de la garza moreau fye week eight). similarly, my passion for writing shone through in my mission statement: “for my mission, i would love to incorporate my passion for writing into helping others develop similar skills” (“writing a personal mission statement” by andy de la garza moreau fye week thirteen). these statements represent my growing realization of a passion that i have. from feeling completely uncertain about my future to having a tangible goal for both myself and helping others, i feel that i have grown. in addition to developing the start of a path for my future, i hope to become more educated about issues in our society. there are important issues in today's world, from social justice concerns to environmental ones, that many individuals remain unaware of. this lack of awareness cannot continue, as “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). however, there is hope for improvement. as stated by admiral richard e. byrd, “‘half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i strongly agree with this statement, and would like to better implement it into my own life. through reading this semester’s sources, one https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ of the most effective methods for combating ignorance and a lack of awareness seems to be accompaniment. by accompanying others and being accompanied, we can better understand other perspectives: “by being aware of what you’re trying to do, engaging in it, reflecting on experiences of it -both accompanying and being accompanied -you get better. like teaching and swimming and learning a new language, with accompaniment, you get better by awareness and by practice” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this quote shows the value that accompaniment gives all parties involved, allowing one to become more aware and help others in the process. while accompaniment may seem like a simple process, the thought of reaching out to others or searching for help can be daunting. however, it is not surprising that making positive change is difficult. likewise, implementing practices that bring about social change can seem like a monumental task. however, i am reminded by notre dame alumnus such as zoe kourajian that it is possible: in the years since [graduating], she has established herself as an innovator in the instruction of history, creating a curriculum reflective of the cultural experiences of all students. she strives to ensure that every single student, regardless of their background, sees their history valued and taught as essential to the american story (“domer dozen” by notre dame alumni association moreau fye week two). it is inspiring to see an individual who was in a similar position to me years ago making a difference in her community, and i hope to use her work as motivation for making my impact on the world. kourajian’s work with the american school system raises an important point: there is a lack of representation and understanding for many communities in the united states and world https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ beyond. there are many causes for this lack of connection between various groups in the united states, such as racial segregation: “most whites live, grow, play, learn, love, work and die primarily in social and geographic racial segregation” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). while it is extremely unfortunate that there are demographics of the american people who are truly incapable of understanding each other’s situations, work just as kourajian’s shows that there are ways to educate individuals about other american experiences. the impact of her work once again motivates me to take steps to understand other perspectives. a hispanic-american, i am guilty of gravitating towards individuals with similar backgrounds to myself. however, i have also gravitated towards others with similar academic backgrounds or beliefs to myself. while it is nice to have a sense of belonging and connections to those who are similar to me, there are potential dangers to this behavior: “bubbles turn into echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinions” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd moreau fye week eleven). it is possible that by surrounding oneself solely by like minded individuals, they can create a culture that discriminates against differences in beliefs. i strive to keep from creating echo chambers in my life, in order to be more aware of a variety of opinions and beliefs, in order to become a more tolerant and well-rounded person. in addition to making a difference in the world, i believe that in order to be an informed individual one must be able to understand and be critical of him or herself. as stated by pope francis, “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). if we cannot work on ourselves, then we cannot expect to work with https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ others to improve the conditions of our communities or the world at large. this quote shows me both the role of self-awareness in improving the world and the importance of self-reflection in a life well lived. however, as important as we are as individuals, we must remember that we are not the only individuals who matter. in worrying about ourselves, it is possible that we “[leave] behind thousands of human beings, or entire populations, on the side of the road” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i have been guilty of letting my personal issues takeover my thoughts, making me forget about the lives of those around me. this quote shows me that in order to bring about positive change, we cannot only think about ourselves, but those around us. from creating my own goal, recognizing places for improvement, and enacting such improvements, there are many ways in which i can strive for a life well lived. while i am far from reaching all of the goals discussed throughout this integration, i hope that this activity serves as a sense of motivation for my future endeavors. it is never easy to plan out one's future, but by setting general expectations for how i want to live my life, i feel that i will be able to work towards any potential changes to my goals. there is no one way to achieve a life well lived, but i hope that through living up to these core principles, i will be able to create one for myself. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 rooney capstone integration april 29, 2022 moreau fye this essay makes me vulnerable...but isn’t that the point? i believe that my mission statement accurately describes how i want to orient my life. throughout the entire school year, we have slowly learned how to form the perfect mission statement. starting with self reflection during our first week, we dove into searching for what lives we wanted to live. although there are times where i feel that the life i am living changes everyday, i believe that my life is one of adventure and love. with my values that i find from my family and friends, i have learned to love and appreciate the life i live. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyermoreau fye week one). it is true, there is so little that we need but our minds are always in a rush to think ahead to everything we must accomplish or what we think we need. we want so many things, we think that we need so much to happen at rapid speed. while thinking about my mission statement, i want to focus on what really matters and slow down. additionally looking at something that inspires my mission statement and a life well-lived, it is important to understand that “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” (hesburgh film produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley-moreau fye week two). if there is any quote that was able to stick with me all year, it would be this one; simply because i agree with it so much. i used to look at my failures with my head down, however now i understand that it is those failures that got me to where i am today. there are still many questions i must ask myself in order to live a life well-lived, but i believe people must always ask themselves what and where are the sources of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 joy in their lives and how can we use those sources to better ourselves? in order to do this we have to ignore the fact that we as humans “naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die -by ruth grahammoreau fye week three). after reading this article from week three, i have gained a different perspective on the quote above. there once was a time where i did indeed think that everyday, we must simply push through to get through our hours in order to get through our days, weeks, months, and years. in other words, i used to think that our lives were just “continuing” on some imaginary timeline. with having the ability to intentionally think about our own deaths every day, what we learned from sister theresa aletheia noble, we will slowly be able to appreciate the present and focus on the future. with these ideas in mind, we eventually will be able to find meaning and focus on what really matters to us as individuals. i believe that others are able to see my mission statement in action. people are able to see me exploring a life well-lived because i like to examine all my options. this is the time in our lives where we are supposed to discover what feels right! with this benign said, taking the “7 clues to help you get started with the career development process” during week four, i felt a sense of exploring sides of myself that were at first a little quiet. “learning your own unique pattern of interests, motivation, satisfaction and meaning is an important first step in career development” (7 clues: an interactive assessment activity by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). not only is this important for career development, but it is important for developing our mission statements as well. continuing around this idea of others being able to see our mission statement in action, we must think back to the question: what roles do others play in our discernment? at first, i had the idea that discernment was all about me and my own thoughts and views. however, after the conversation i https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs had with my mother during the discernment conversation activity, i have realized that my discernment is affected by others around me. i learned that hearing how others view my strengths and weaknesses allowed me to widen my horizons. “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves.” (week five discernment conversation activity by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week five). this was a beautiful, yet new idea for me to think about. who would have thought that in order for us to better understand ourselves, we needed to hear from those around us? after all, we all have obstacles in order to get our life well-lived and we’re going to need some help from others. over the course of this school year, i can say that i have accumulated my own personal obstacles. however, i have not been the best at responding to these obstacles. this is something that i learned during the conversation with my mother from week five, and i was able to look back on my life and i realized there were many times where i found myself with a simple problem and thinking it was forever going to affect my future. after watching the video, “5 minutes,” from week six, i was hit with the reminder that your problems only have the effect your responses create. in other words, a problem is only a problem if you make it one. (5 minutes by grotto moreau fye week six). i believe there will be difficult times when trying to live out my mission. relationships that fill you with confidence and build you up are ones you should keep. to me, a life well-lived is acceptance, tenderness, and the ability to communicate. when you can communicate well, you are able to express how you feel and discuss your jurisdictions and feelings, however, when communication is lost, it can be difficult to focus on your own mission. “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). to me, this quote encaptures the need for others' creativity and how surrounding ourselves with others provides a sense of hope. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript when pope francis was discussing how every individual can have hope, but a group of people with hope creates the idea of “us” having hope, this “us” creates a revolution. it is this revolution that is able to guide us down the path of humility. i believe that with humility and tenderness, as the pope states, people have power. in the end, if we make relationships, we are able to surround ourselves with others to build our sense of humility in order to have the power to live out our missions. while living out our mission, we are able to define a life well-lived, which is exactly what we were able to do during week eight. i was able to define that my life was well-lived when i simply revolve my priorities around me being happy (integration three assignment moreau fye week eight). i am going to need to learn a lot more before i truly understand that, but as long as i know that happiness is my first priority, my mission is already halfway complete. i believe that my mission may be challenged with suffering. engaging with accompaniment in a suffering world is a difficult task. there were many times in my past where i have found people doing acts of kindness, not because they truly wanted to accompany suffering, but because they felt they needed to. for example, during my junior year of high school, i would always overhear people taking part in community service; however, the conversation usually ended with, “boy, this will look really good on my college application.” i participated in girl scouts, kindergarten through my senior year and always received the question, “why are you still doing it?” or “i wish i did that so i could put that down on my college application.” these statements always startled me because the reason i did girl scouts was not to partake in a “grand gesture of generosity” to look good on paper, i did it because i wanted to. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done.” (a learning journey together, steve reifenberg by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) i feel that this quote shows the real meaning of https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit true kindness and describes how to have true intentions in order to strive for a life well-lived. advancing this idea, learning how to embrace humanity can help us break down our “walls” that prevent vulnerability. while looking at “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame,” it is obvious to see how students are able to embrace humanity here at school. i can say that my personal beliefs already agree with most of the statements discussed in that reading. i condemn harassment of any kind; all learning, service, how we treat others are founded upon jesus christ; and we should welcome all people, no matter their background (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame by the university mission and vision moreau fye week ten). with this being said, i have to mention that although there were many statements involving inclusion on campus here at notre dame, i feel that i often hear people talking about how they do not feel included. it may be extremely difficult to have the ability to please and make everyone feel 100% included. however, in comparison to other college campuses, i think that we can always strive to be better. keeping this in mind, i always try to create a space where everyone can feel comfortable and appreciated. if every individual student on campus can keep that mindset, the overall feeling of inclusivity will increase. it is clear to see there are many people dealing with things we may never see on the surface, so always treat people with kindness and respect in all that we do. i believe that my mission may be strengthened by growing in wisdom and courage. i have always loved learning about gaining wisdom because the root “soph-” means wise. of course, the sofia that i am, finds this fascinating. another thing i found fascinating when diving into growing in wisdom was echo chambers and how “echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). now, i have a better understanding on how echo chambers have the ability to lock people into certain world views. with this being said, i understand how to get out of them. once we are out https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s of them, we can act with courage. “there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them” (constitutions of the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve). i have learned that i must become more aware that within our world, there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power. with these networks, we have learned and adapted to live within them, and we have become aware of how to act courageously against the negative effects of them. with hope of the mutual understanding for human appreciation that was stated in the constitution, i strive to act courageously towards a better world for all people. i believe in my mission statement. “we encourage you to consider your own articulation of a life well-lived and how to best pursue and live such a life” (writing a personal mission statement activity moreau fye week thirteen). my mission is to make everyone feel that they are loved and appreciated. i want to leave a mark, knowing that i smiled at everyone i could have smiled at. i hope that i learn how to always live courageously so that my voice is able to be heard in times where it is needed. i strive that my little sisters and all those younger than me can see that i lived a life well-lived, resulting in them wanting to do the same. i aim that every relationship i make allows for both people to grow and if there are times of trouble with another person, i am able to discern and make the right decisions. i wish to gain wisdom each and every day…after all the root “soph” means wise. i am a person who grew up with no religious background. i am a person who came to notre dame and entered rcia. i am a person who will end the school year catholic. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit prest 24 april 2022 prof. espeseth moreau my mission: a future of service thinking about myself at this time last year makes me realize how much i have developed just over the last eight and a half months. during week 13 of moreau this semester, i wrote in my mission statement: “i will trust in my mentors.” i am blessed with incredible upperclassmen who have guided me through the last two semesters and given me invaluable advice on life, faith, and academics. my biggest goal in life is to emulate the example of and love of jesus and the kind people i encounter in everything that i do. growing in my faith at notre dame, especially with studying theology as my minor, is one of my favorite parts of attending this university. i feel that nowhere in the world would better equip me for life as a naval officer and citizen of the world, instilling me with qualities of trust in god, friendship, and hard work. something important that i realized during week 1 activity “pause for reflection activity” was how important self-care was for me, and how poorly i prioritized it during the fall semester. in order to better myself and focus on my own character development, i needed to make myself my number one priority and concern, not a boy or a friend that i felt i needed to impress. furthermore, as i was determining my priorities, i asked myself the question, “is this a source of joy for me?” “what am i getting out of doing this activity?” i really pondered this during week 3 of moreau when i was deciding what kinds of questions i needed to ask to guide myself towards a better path of discernment in college. since my time is so limited here, i have had to make hard cuts and choices when it comes to my schedule. additionally, i really struggled with criticism of myself this year, which i really discovered during week 11’s “growing in wisdom” module. college has been a humbling time for me; i am no longer the top of my class or the expert in the room. prof. blaschko’s video “how to avoid an echo chamber” emphasized the importance of listening to others and giving everyone a chance to speak and voice their opinion. during week 12 of moreau, i read more about the suffering of others in dean marcus cole’s recount of what happened to his father when marcus was a young boy. i felt lucky, and very guilty, that i had never a) witnessed this type of violence first-hand and b) worried about the chances of it happening to me personally. this article woke me up and empowered me, making me determined to closely accompany those whose voices i can echo and support, even in a small fashion. all it takes is one single action to get the ball rolling and create good change in the world. robin diangelo, in her article, “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism,” urges her audience to “let go of your racial certitude and reach for humility.” i believe college has exposed me to a plethora of different people from all over the world and all walks of life, and hearing their experiences and stories is inspiring and humbling. during moreau week 7, we touched on chapter 8 of the memoir tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle. i have read this book before for a seminar class, but saw it in a new light in the context of our discussion. the waitress in the story treated the ex-gang members in her restaurant with common kindness and courtesy, even though it was evident what kind of background they came from. i want to strive to be a small but positive force for good and have even just a little impact on the people that i encounter, hopefully making their day just a little better than before they met with me. my relationships are the thing i treasure most in this world, which i have definitely confirmed throughout the last few months of college. despite focusing a lot of time and effort into those i care about most, there are some things out of my control. that is why i decided to do a mindfulness activity from mcwell during week 6. i elected to make my way to como each night for a 10-15 minute devotion or quiet time in the chapel. i found this practice to be calming and centering for me, especially before beginning a long evening of homework or studying. giving my problems to god this year has been an overwhelmingly positive experience for me, bringing me closer to him and easing a little bit of the stress of crazy college life. one thing that has been solid, or not really in question for me this year, has been my future career plans. in week 5 of moreau, my professor had the class stand up while he read out short descriptions of a mystery career. if we were okay with the description, we stayed standing, and if it was a dealbreaker, we sat down. my two nrotc friends and i remained standing the entire time, even after everyone else sat down for the last question, which was, “some may consider your career immoral.” this led to a big examination of conscience for me and made me come to terms with the fact that many people might not agree with the fact that i want to serve in the military. however, i could not imagine doing anything else with my life. the navy gives me a higher purpose and a way to give back to the nation that has blessed me with so many liberties. despite this being a large part of my identity, i also realized while watching the movie “hesburgh” during week 2 was that i do not have to have one single thing label me, similar to fr. hesburgh. he was a philanthropist, a mediator in the political world, and just a regular, approachable university president. something else that sparked my attention in the “navigating your career journey” article from the meruelo family center for career development was the quote, “it’s not a one-step process.” i feel that most people would agree with this piece of wisdom, but i found myself disagreeing, because i have locked myself into my career for at least five years after college, which i am completely fine with. since coming to notre dame, i have found my voice advocating for survivors of sexual assault through the callisto program and my role in the gender relations department of student government. now that i have come to terms with what happened to me personally, i am ready to help others tell their stories, which is empowering on both ends. during week 9, we read prof. reifenberg’s essay about accompaniment. one of my top takeaways from it was the importance of creating agency. staying involved in this empathetic and strong group of people in stugov is something i look forward to for the next three years and beyond. as my freshman year, and a quarter of my time at notre dame, comes to a close, i am feeling nostalgic and very grateful for my time here. i have improved my time management skills, challenged myself academically and physically, and made friends to last a lifetime. i can’t wait to see what the future holds, and i am excited for the journey ahead. week citations week 1“pause for reflection activity,” https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view week 2“hesburgh” film, jerry barca and christine o’malley week 3“three key questions” fr. michael himes, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145929 week 4“navigating your career journey,” und, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5in-class activity with the mystery career prof. espeseth week 6“ways to practice mindfulness” mcdonald center for student well-being, https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view week 7tattoos on the heart fr. greg boyle, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/524003/download?download_frd=1 week 8integration 1 (n/a) week 9“teaching accompaniment” prof. reifenberg, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit week 10“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” robin diangelo, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit week 11“how to avoid an echo chamber” prof. blaschko, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd week 12“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” dean g. marcus cole, https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ week 13my own moreau mission statement, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jugz5xjd29g0c5yxvtcvssevbfsyaup_8xrbn2bypbc/edit capstone integration selm 1 josephine selm alison thigpen fys 10102 29 april 2022 reflections on a well-lived life: how can i pursue one? throughout this semester of moreau classes, we have tackled issues in the realms of well-lived lives and shaping one's personal ideals and beliefs. week 13 tackled a summation of these ideals through the production of a personal mission statement. this activity proved insightful through its combination of the semester’s ideals and identification of my own beliefs, and this work will serve as a means for me to further develop this mission statement, utilizing content from the last 13 weeks to do so. as a student at the university of notre dame, i seek continual knowledge and learning. it is important that i continue to expose myself to different beliefs and viewpoints so as to gain a better understanding of the world, as “[w]e should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree, and attempting to fully understand their argument” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by thinknd moreau fye week 11). this exposure enables one to learn and grow – to become more well-rounded. it is my belief that through interactions with others of different beliefs and backgrounds, one grows in wisdom and experience. i strive to live a happy, fulfilling life that ultimately aids those in my community who are in need. this aspect is important, as “the farther we go in giving the more we stand to receive. our broader experience allows both the appreciation and the critique of every culture and the disclosure that no culture of this world can be our abiding home” (“constitutions of the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ selm 2 congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). aiding those in my community provides not only a way for me to help those in need, but also for me to grow and learn as a result, as “[o]ne cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship … not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). accompaniment in particular is an interesting topic, as it sets key characteristics of accompaniment – aiding those in the community should not be done from the mindset that i am helping this person or group from a place of superiority, but from a setting of equality, as we are all human beings at the end of the day, and we will all struggle from time to time. despite the good in the world, there are still evils present, and it is necessary to respond to this suffering by aiding others without viewing these hardships as demeaning or a form of self-empowerment. i believe that it is necessary to approach and accept both the good and the bad in life in order to embrace humanity, both in the world and within ourselves. although i believe that searching for happiness is an important aspect of my livelihood, i understand that i can not and will not always be in the same state of, and that “[i]t’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” by ruth graham moreau fys week 3). hardships and failings will come around, but embracing these rather than ignoring or distancing myself from them will help me in the long run. failure is inevitable, whether that be academically, socially, or in a multitude of different sectors – “[i]t’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fys week 2). learning to https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 selm 3 embrace my failures and grow from them has been one of the hardest challenges for me to face, especially through my time here at notre dame, but i hope to continue to grow in this skill and to become a better version of myself as a result. i stand for inclusion of all, and i hope to build close relationships with others around me as i continue through my life. as pope francis said, “[n]one of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i”, separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone.” by his holiness pope francis moreau fys week 7). i believe that everyone is better off by the act of inclusion of all, whether that be through portrayals of people in media to interactions with those of different beliefs and backgrounds in one’s life. advocating for this inclusion is an important step to take to achieve this belief. i strive to continue to grow in love for myself as well as love for others. i have struggled a lot through the years with self-confidence, and a quote from the material in week 10 stood out to me that i feel pertains to this aspect of my mission statement: “‘i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). developing a strong network of friends has helped me, especially throughout the semester and all of its ups and downs. week 5 of moreau involved an insightful look into my life from an outsider perspective through an interview with my close friend. although this interview highlighted issues that i face, such as stress and perfectionism, it also provided a different perspective on my life and my interests, also displaying that i do have a support network that i can rely on during hardships and that i do have those around me who love and support me, no matter my failings or setbacks. week 8 involved a https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 selm 4 similar introspection into my life through the writing of integration 3, which was a eulogy. this project provided a lens for me to view my life in a different way, as i chose to approach the topic from the viewpoint of a friend writing about me after my passing. this task allowed me to see different areas of my life that i excel in, as well as what tasks and aspects i truly am happy in pursuing. in terms of success, i define success through one’s own experiences and circumstances. success will look different for everyone, and it can interact on a wide scale, from small to large. i believe that happiness in one’s situation is the best thing for me to strive for, especially in regards to my goals. this happiness stems from interactions with others, and it is one of the highest goods i can strive for in my life. looking towards my current career plans and goals, i am still unsure of what i want to pursue exactly, but i know that whatever i choose, i ultimately want to be happy. additionally, i want to pursue a career that incorporates a number of my different interests. “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services university of notre dame moreau fys week 4). looking towards the future, i hope to employ this mindset as i continue to search for my career path, and to become confident in this journey. this continued introspection into my life is important to pursue, as i continue to grow and develop my own beliefs and ideals. as i continue, i strive to incorporate the utilization of what questions rather than why questions, as “why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ selm 5 tasha eurich phd moreau fys week 6). introspection is important to continue as i process through my life, approaching my successes and failures from this different perspective. all of these beliefs have been strengthened in my time here at notre dame – from new experiences and surroundings, and from learning more about myself throughout it all. i have found that i have a tendency to hyperfixate on miniscule tasks or setbacks; however i have come to the belief that “[i]t’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as i continue to grow and develop through my time here at notre dame, i hope to grow and develop these beliefs, acting on them both for my own sake and for the sake of others to enact a difference in the world that is beneficial to all. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ selm 6 works cited “congregation of holy cross ave crux spes unica.” congregation of holy cross, https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/. francis, his holiness pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, apr. 2017, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_build ing_includes_everyone/transcript. graham, ruth. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” the new york times, the new york times, 14 may 2021, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html. hesburgh. directed by patrick creadon, staring fr. theodore hesburgh, 2018. iyer, pico. “why we need to slow down our lives.” ideas.ted.com, 4 nov. 2014, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/. phd, tasha eurich. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way).” ideas.ted.com, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. reifenberg, steve. "teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" thinknd. “big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber.” youtube, 12 feb. 2020, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s selm 7 walsh, jacob. “growing up gay and catholic.” grotto network, 18 aug. 2021, https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay -and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 integration 3 moreau fye integration 1 22 feb, 2022 role model welcome family and friends, i would like to first start by thanking you all for coming out to celebrate a loved one. we are gathered here today to commemorate the life of kathryn rose krause. katie or katy, as most know her by, lived a full and joyful life. it is evident by all of you here that katie touched the lives of many. she devoted her life to caring for her friends and family. katie was hardworking, generous and someone we will forever hold deep in our hearts. she was a great daughter, sister, companion, mother and friend to any one. she was filled with passion and dedication to her career and working for a greater good, and we will miss her dearly. from a young age, katie always felt a vocation to the field of medicine. she wanted to make a difference in the lives of as many people as possible. throughout her long journey in education, she worked hard to carry out this calling by pursuing a major in science preprofessional. this decision did not come easy to katie, however. it took her a while to decide what to do in undergraduate, but thankfully she was always reminded that, “deciding on a major does not decide the rest of your life,”(“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career moreau fye week four). thankfully, katie was provided an undergraduate experience that allowed her to find her passion. notre dame gave her the opportunity to explore many aspects of what she was interested in. katie thanked notre dame for many things, but especially that it upheld its vow from father hesburgh to “be a true, modern https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ university,”(“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). this allowed her the opportunity to encounter bias and diversity that continued to inspire her towards choosing a career. she took this as motivation to determine her passion, and despite many hardships, she did everything to get there. there are a lot of words to describe katie’s life, but one word that does not fit is “easy.” katie aspired to challenge herself, and never took the simple road in life. she encountered many struggles and times of doubt as a result. it was in these times of doubt, however, that katie was able to relay her faith into her relationship with god. she put her trust in god, and remembered that, “the purpose of life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god,”(“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). and as a result, katie never gave up. she let suffering make her stronger and used it as motivation to do better and work harder. god does not give you more than you can handle, so katie always channeled her faith to get her through tough times. additionally, katie’s faith and love for god allowed her to find motivation when the future was uncertain. there were many moments in katie’s life where she struggled to continue pushing and challenging herself. she struggled to find motivation to do both everyday, mundane tasks and to do the things that pushed her to her limits. then, however, she was given a piece of information that changed the way she thought. sister aletheia’s words, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them,”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by sister aletheia moreau fye week three) encouraged katie to continue to push herself through tough times. a life well-lived contains a life full of challenges. if we do not welcome challenges into our lives, we cannot grow and strengthen ourselves. aletheia reminds https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html us that if we think with the end in mind, as katie pushed herself to do as well, we can learn to better appreciate the gift of life, especially in times of doubt and frustration. as we all know, katie worked hard in her everyday life to establish and flourish in her relationships with others. she touched the hearts of each and every one of us here, and will continue to remain with us forever. those of you here should know how much she cared about you all. strong and true relationships were of the utmost importance to katie. she knew better than anyone that “the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us.’ we all need each other,”(“ why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). katie strived to make time for others, and practiced the importance of working together, rather than in competition, in order to live out a good life. in her career, in her education and in her social life, she worked to build healthy relationships with her peers. this characteristic was seen throughout her entire life. even in her early years, her parents saw how important honesty and true friendship were to katie(paula and kevin krause moreau fye week five). after going through a few bumps in the road, they saw how dedicated katie became to building strong relationships based on trust. she also knew the importance of in person communication and its role in developing meaningful connections. katie always preferred talking and communicating with her peers in person, rather than over technology. despite the increase in virtual contact, she always knew that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves,”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one) and used this as a reminder to take advantage of face to face communication when you can. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ as we reflect on the life of katie, we should use her impact on the community to inspire us in our own lives. we should work to follow our passions, just as katie modeled throughout her life. we should use our faith to not only guide us in times of doubt, but to guide us in all aspects of our lives. we should strive to create significant relationships so that we can work in unison for a greater good whilst being able to rely on others when we are in need of support or joy. katie is not only a role model to all of us, but she is also our number one fan. no matter where we go, i can assure you that katie is right there with us, rooting us on. thank you theophilus daniel march 4, 2022 moreau fye integration three victory over death the stillness in which the mystics approach him is intent and alert—at the opposite pole from sleep or reverie. they are becoming like him. silences in the physical world occur in empty places: but the ultimate peace is silent through very density of life. saying is swallowed up in being. there is no movement because his action (which is himself) is timeless. c.s. lewis, miracles[footnoteref:1] [1: lewis, c. s. miracles. new york: harpercollins, 2009.] introduction the first qqc of the semester set the tone particularly well for both this eulogy and the semester to come: silence. essayist pico iyer wrote that “it is the rest in a piece that gives music its resonance or shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). what an arresting idea – to think of silence as an end in itself! this embrace of silence can go two ways, as i see it: either silence is dense with life (as above), or it is absolute nothingness. i prefer the former because i think it is the real point of silence. embracing stillness in this sense means recognizing that for all the action we perform throughout our lives, our ultimate goal should be a kind of rest. but this is not an ordinary rest. it is more akin to being filled than being emptied. “saying is swallowed up in begin,” as lewis says. that’s the goal. that’s my goal. eulogy from a distant friend was this a good life? despite myself, i think it was not. i think this man would agree. he would not say he wanted “a good life;” he wanted “the good life.” so much of his focus, his impetus, can be seen as a perpetual vision of the forest above the trees. he gave the impression that he came to live the only right kind of life – and while there are many whom he thought fit into this definition, the life he lived still could not be considered “a good life” by the same criteria we use that term for others. i have begun a bit vague, necessarily. i do not want to trivialize the occasion, however, so i will try to show what i mean by pointing to two things that our age has come to terms with quite comfortably: death and desire. our sight, as humans, is quite limited. we can see others fine enough, on most days – we can diagnose, psychoanalyze, convict, judge, deconstruct – but turning this tool upon ourselves has proven difficult, even impossible. a psychologist i once knew said that “a good rule of thumb, then, is that why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). with this in mind, i come to eulogize an old friend, to help make clear who this man was. there are many things i will not say about him, so the ones which i will – below – are only the most essential. this man entombed remembered death and desire more clearly than many. he would in fact say that death and desire are both a kind of preparation. for him, to “remember that you will die” is to remember something which will not always be true – it exhausted its meaning, its impact, when that death came. this man thought death and desire were a kind of preparation. it was a strange way of thinking. it was a stranger way of living. he took a kind of pessimism with regard to death that many today do not share – for him, there was almost nothing good about death itself. most of us would at least give some reverence to the subject, a kind of respect for death, even a rationalization of it. he would do nothing of the sort. death could only ever be a sign of something greater than itself. it could only ever point. i feel compelled toward another quote here that he would be fond of, supposedly of confucius. “when a wise man points at the moon the imbecile examines the finger.” for this man, death was that finger – life is the moon. there is a second portion – desire. more accurately, restlessness. another good associate of mine said something like “restlessness is indeed the best thing about us” (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3). i think my associate was quoting some theologian, which only strengthened my conviction of its universality. restlessness – desire – pursuit – all of this gives us life. if we were placated, what life is there? what is “activity” if there is no motion? but if there is motion, then that means we are moving to something – which means we are at least a little unfulfilled. we are searching, forever searching. this is life. but my old friend disagrees, i think. and using the very same theologian he argued against me: “our hearts are restless until they rest in thee” ( who this “thee” is i am still unsure. perhaps it is speaking of a rest in each other, in the embrace of humanity that transcends borders and cultural boundaries and welcomes all. only when we are united can we be at peace. that’s a beautiful picture worth embracing, but it is an abstraction. the word is “thee,” not plural “you” – he was not talking about other humans, i think. for this man, my old friend, “rest” was the goal at the end after all. again, i am not sure why someone would think in this way – we’ve had many long conversations about it, and i am still quite unsure what to make of it. it seemed for a time that he agreed with me that life means “activity,” but he somehow thought “activity” and “rest” could be one and the same. it mystifies me. perhaps it mystified him, too. this has been quite the philosophical eulogy already. some of that is appropriate – for people like us, where else will we get our philosophy? we don’t spend much time thinking about it elsewhere. if not here, then nowhere else will these things be thought on. so forgive my abstractions and my explanations. i do wish, though, to delve into some of the concrete realities of this man’s life, the kinds of things we can measure much more clearly, though they were not quite as important to him. this man took to his career the way one takes to a trip (“navigating your career journey,” undergraduate career services – moreau fye week 4): a journey mindset, continuously moving about, sometimes stopping at unexpected places, sometimes simply stopping, other times changing, often growing, often changing. it is a one-way trip, i am afraid – he’s not coming back to us. no one is, or ever will. but as trips go, he made strong and delightful sense of meaning pervade it all. we, for all our differing dispositions today, can appreciate that, i think. his life was a life of service. it sounds either fanciful or damning today to say “conviction should undergird all our actions.” for him, though, “conviction” was not some psychological, juristic, or theological reality – not alone, at least. for him, “conviction” appeared wherever action appeared. it was not possible to do something which did not reveal conviction – either it revealed a failure in living up to that conviction or it showed one living up to it. in this way even “i want to become rich” is a conviction. it does not need to be something high and noble and verbose. what was his conviction? at last, i don’t need to ruminate; i have a quote. “my conviction is to see each person return to the god in whose image and likeness they are made.” the man was, if you’ll pardon my polysyllabic mess here, a philosopher-theologian (“irish compass activity” – moreau fye week 5). it does not seem to be an either/or, or a both/and, but a kind of blend of the two. you’d almost get the feeling that they were the same thing for him. this philosophy-theology undergirded everything he did, no matter how lean or concrete or particular, how hands-on or dirty, how human. the abstract informed the concrete. thought came before action, but it also informed it, and perhaps surpassed it. both the remnants of his thought and his action remain here with us today. in a world such as this, even we can appreciate such a legacy: to live not just for others, but for “the other” – to accept humiliation or pain or defeat for the sake of something greater. to believe that this world was not the end, but that there was another awaiting, a jurisdiction of god’s own, where everything would be perfect and as it always was meant to be, forever (“chapter 8: jurisdiction,” from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week 7). there is much to unpack there, like i have said. i already feel i am going a bit over what i expected, and i want to constrict my remarks as much as is possible to the most essential of this man. i think i have represented that so far – here is one more addition. an important man that my grandmother knew said “serve our country, put your country before party and before politics, and always do the right thing” (“hesburgh,” film by jerry barca and christina o’malley – moreau fye week 2) today this is quite banal; “thanks,” we say, “but we already knew that – just look around us!” yes, look around us, indeed. it is the simplicity and directness of this advice which makes it so applicable and so relevant even now, well beyond the historical confines of the moment which formed it. we are living, at least in some important ways, the very truth of this statement. we have global solidarity, and the party and politics of yesteryear look nothing like our more amicable disagreements today. who can say this is not at least an indirect product of the work of this man before us in this tomb? who can say he was not “faithfully allegiant?” his loyalties may have been different from ours concerning death. but as they say, “death is the great equalizer.” the differences we’ve had in life cease to matter then. in the true spirit of memento mori, then, let us begin to abolish these differences even today, even in life. perhaps we can find the very life our friend here sought. perhaps what he was looking for is right here among us – us humans, working, struggling, achieving. but my friend, my old friend, would look at me a bit strange if i said such a thing. and he may not here a word of what i say now, but i get the feeling he almost is looking at me in the same way now. [silence] bear the discomfort some. i know this is not the kind of thing we talk about. but it was the kind of thing he would, and in his honor and memory, here’s to talking about it once more. thank you, friend. i hope you are home indeed. [clapping; a half minute passes] excuse me – yes, my apologies. there is one more thing. there is one more note he gave me to read not long ago, and i actually have not read it until now. i wanted to make it something we all see together, since everything he’s ever given me to read has been of that nature. i cannot leave without it. it has no title, and i am not sure if he wrote it or quoted it – likely some combination. death is swallowed up in victory. where, o death, your victory? where, o death, your sting? now the sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. but thanks be to god, who gives us the victory through our lord jesus christ! works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1 “hesburgh,” film by jerry barca and christina o’malley – moreau fye week 2 “three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3 “navigating your career journey,” undergraduate career services – moreau fye week 4 “irish compass activity” – moreau fye week 5 “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6 “chapter 8: jurisdiction,” from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week 7 moreau first year experience capstone integration 29 april 2022 my mission mapped out mission statement: i want to use my ambitious, compassionate, loyal, and dependable values to not only serve others, but to also inspire and empower others to do the same, so that the effect is exponential. i want to pass it on, not just to one person, but to the next generation. because i value collaboration, compassion, and commitment, i want to be part of a community who works hard, works together, and works for others. i want to actively listen and engage with others to gain insight and understand other people’s perspectives, experiences, and struggles. to do this, i must be self-aware of not only myself and my motives, but also the people, environment, and information i expose myself to. i want to be part of a community who stand ups for their beliefs and encourages others to do the same and who takes accountability for the impact of their actions. i want to be dedicated to leading and mentoring others, but also dedicated to taking opportunities and time for myself. all in all, forging and maintain relationships that are built on trust, love, and respect is something i believe is essential to my mission. authentic, strong relationships are an indicator of a life well-lived, and if i exhibit my truest values, i can build friendships and connections with people who are both similar and different from me. i want to use my ambitious, compassionate, loyal, and dependable values to not only serve others, but to also inspire and empower others to do the same, so that the effect is exponential. i want to pass it on, not just to one person, but to the next generation. as one grotto video we watched this semester mentioned, it is important to “focus on what we can do for others” ( "five minutes" by aria swarr on grotto – moreau week 6), and while i think this part of my mission statement will be observed more later in life, i think there are ways i can start living it out today by building a good foundation. i think another important aspect of this part of my mission statement is the empowering part. rather than trying to “be the voice of the voiceless,” it is about creating a space where people “who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard” and will feel empowered to do so ( "teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg– moreau week 9). one way i can inspire and empower others around me in the next three years is to focus on and do the ‘little things.’ for example, taking time out of my day to help a friend who is stressed for an exam or to https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit clean up trash i see outside and in buildings are both small acts that can inspire others around me to do the same. first semester, in my principles of management class, my professor would randomly assign us to do an act of kindness instead of reading the textbook or doing homework. i want to implement this more in my everyday life. i think it is also important to try to include those around me, such as my friends and dormmates, so that the effect is widespread. because i value collaboration, compassion, and commitment, i want to be part of a community who works hard, works together, and works for others. this part of my mission statement will be animated in my next three years at notre dame mostly through club experiences. next year, i specifically want to get involved with volunteering at the boys and girls club, which i think is a perfect example of a community who fulfills these attributes. another club i am part of this year that i want to continue to participate in and even become a leader in is students consulting for nonprofits. this club also is a great example of a community that collaborates to create recommendations to help and support others. additionally, i am applying to become a leader of a committee in my dorm, which i think is also a great place to work together with others to create a welcoming community not only within the dorm, but also throughout the whole campus. something i want to improve with my mindset in these clubs is shifting the focus towards “accompaniment,” which is about changing from “how do we help them” to “we’re in this together” ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau week 9). i want to expand the general idea of service to joining together with the people we are helping, rather than just serving them and moving on. i want to actively listen and engage with others to gain insight and understand other people’s perspectives, experiences, and struggles. to do this, i must be self-aware of not only myself and my motives, but also the people, environment, and information i expose myself to. i want to be part of a community who stand ups for their beliefs and encourages others to do the same and who takes accountability for the impact of their actions. this part of my mission statement starts at an individual level. i cannot expect to be a part of a community or expect others to act in a certain way if i do not do it first. these two statements go together because to stand up for my beliefs and take accountability for my actions, i think i first https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit need to understand and learn about other people’s struggles, experiences, and viewpoints. to do this, i must make “a conscious decision and effort to expand [my] circle” and to “get to know people who differ from [me]” ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something." by dean g. marcus cole – moreau week 12). additionally, it is important to not get “trapped in feedback loops” and to make sure the “picture of our opponents is accurate and well-thought-out” ("big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko at thinknd – moreau week 11). i want to personally and as a community do a better job at not only listening and respecting our opponent’s views but also understanding and representing it correctly. in the next three years, i can animate this part of my mission statement by going to discussions, presentations, or gatherings that represent and discuss important social issues and represent viewpoints different from mine. i can push myself to get to know people from different backgrounds and try to meet as many new people as possible. finally, i must also be self-aware of not only myself, my biases, and my motives, but also the people, environment, and information i expose myself to. after investigating and understanding, it is then my duty to have the courage to stand up and act against injustices. i also must avoid the mentality of being a bystander by holding myself responsible every day to recognize the impact of my actions (or absence thereof). to avoid this mentality, i can begin “by being willing to tolerate the discomfort associated with an honest appraisal and discussion” ( "why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism" by robin diangelo – moreau week 10). discussion and disagreement in a respectful way are how we learn and grow as individuals and as a community. however, it should not stop at discussion. in my next three years here, i want to make sure i am also acting in the community and not being a bystander to injustices. this could range from lifting up other voices to attending presentations to spreading awareness to donating to causes close to my heart. i want to be dedicated to leading and mentoring others, but also dedicated to taking opportunities and time for myself. “there’s no point where you can say that, “i do not have to ask any more questions” ("three key questions" by father michael himes – moreau week 3). something that is important to my mission is not going into ‘auto-pilot mode,’ which just refers to when someone is just going through their daily life routinely and not giving their life, purpose, or vocation any thought. i https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 want to continually ask questions, be curious, and look for new, exciting opportunities. i want to make sure i put time and effort into my own life and wellbeing and that i find time to focus on myself and my interests. at notre dame, this part of my mission statement will be animated through trying new clubs or new hobbies. for example, next year, i want to try and join strike magazine and be a part of their business team because it is something i heard about later this year that i am interested in, and i think it would be a cool opportunity to combine both the business and creative aspects of my life. another experience i want to do is study abroad because i think it would be an amazing experience that would really be for myself and my own growth and learning. all in all, forging and maintain relationships that are built on trust, love, and respect is something i believe is essential to my mission. authentic, strong relationships are an indicator of a life well-lived, and if i exhibit my truest values, i can build friendships and connections with people who are both similar and different from me. building strong, meaningful relationships is definitely the most important part of my mission statement. in one of the grotto articles, it mentions to “pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved” because that is where god can be shining through ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh – moreau week 10). moreover, relationships are core to our beings and are also a way god can show his love to us or talk to us. i think the relationships that i will gain and experience in these next three years at notre dame will be influential for the rest of my life. not only the relationships with my close friends, but the relationships i build with peers, teachers, and others will impact my life in more ways than i will ever know. in order to build these authentic, strong relationships though i must assure to put effort and time into them. at notre dame, i am sure i will experience both positive and negative relationships, but i will have to always just put my best attitude and support forward and see who reciprocates and appreciates. in conclusion, i think my mission statement does a fairly decent job at describing how i want to orient my life, but it definitely will change and modify over time as i grow up and have new experiences. for me, it is extremely important that this mission is just not a statement, but a promise of action. i want to practice what i preach, and i want others to be able to see my core values and beliefs. throughout my life, there is guaranteed to be times where one part of this https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 mission will be lived out more than another part, or where i am struggling to live out many parts of this mission. whether it will be because of emotions or practical reasons or selfish reasons, i am sure there will be instances when it is difficult to live this mission, but i think it is important that i always try to better than i was yesterday. notre dame will be an instrumental part of my mission, and i believe throughout my years here, some parts of my mission statement will be strengthened or changed. the classes i take, the experiences i have, and the people i meet here will have a great impact on my life, and consequently on my mission statement. moreay fye integration three professor oswald moreau fye integration three 27 february 2022 a life well-lived, through the eyes of someone still figuring it out dear younger spencer, i am currently writing to you from a study room in jordan hall of science, at the university of notre dame, your dream school. yes, we made it! but, our success did not come without struggle or learning experiences. throughout these next few years, you will learn many valuable lessons, meet many amazing people, and have life-changing experiences. you will learn little skills, like how to tie your shoes, and larger ones, like how to study for finals (heads up, they only get harder). you will learn that no goal is too big and if you set your mind to something you truly can accomplish anything. you will learn the value of hard work, compassion, and dedication. but, you also will learn through hard experiences the meaning of resilience. you will fall, you will fail, and you will struggle; but, you will persevere. you will emerge a stronger, more self-assured person because of what you have gone through. you will learn that a life well-lived is built on a foundation of self-love, righteousness, compassion, and gratitude. i hope that from this letter you are able to take away some wisdom that will help make sense of some of the harder lessons, add value to the happier ones, and guide you through these next few years. so, in the spirit of wisdom, here are my top seven most valuable lessons to live a life well-lived. my first piece of advice to you is that rest and reflection are invaluable. how you treat yourself, how you talk to yourself, and the way that you carry yourself matters. if you want to be the best version of yourself, you cannot practice constant self-degradation or burn yourself out by expecting perfection. this is something that you will learn and will be continually practicing. i am sorry to tell you this, but even at nineteen, you are still learning how to give yourself a break. you are, and will always be, hard on yourself because you hold yourself to such high standards, but expecting perfection out of yourself does nothing but lead to disappointment. a quote that helped me realize the importance of self-reflection and peace reads, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in this quote, pico iyer compares “pause” to a “rest in a piece of music,” and turns something that you would consider lazy, or unnecessary, into something beautiful and essential for a work of art. spencer, your life is the music, and taking time for self-reflection is what makes it more meaningful – i hope that you come to understand this. something that i have grown to realize, especially during my time at notre dame, is that your best will not always translate into excellence. you will struggle here, especially in general chemistry, and it will be the first class that you will take where studying for hours does not equate to a good grade. it will be demoralizing, but it will cement pico iyer’s lesson: you need peace and reflection to live a fulfilling life. throughout the time that i struggled, i came to recognize the value of taking a break; it is not lazy, but rather prevents burnout and saves your mental health. so, what i want you to take away from this lesson is to be easy on yourself because, as cheesy as it sounds, everything will work out for you the way that it is meant to. this mindset will help you live a fulfilling, happy life well-lived. secondly, i want you to understand that difficult decisions are inevitable, life will not be a cakewalk, but what truly matters is maintaining morality and compassion in the face of trouble, doubt, or hardship. in a class at notre dame called moreau, you will learn about an amazing man by the name of father pete hesburgh. you will be completely taken aback by his many https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ accomplishments and the fact that he truly lived a life well-lived, characterized by intense kindness for everyone he met. he made an impact in the lives of others, and left them feeling better than when he found them–this is the way that you too should aim to live. one particular quote of his that i feel is relevant to share with you comes from his movie and states, “noone likes to look at the heart of darkness…the real solutions are painful” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). hesburgh’s compassion even in the hardest times is such an important and valuable lesson for you to learn. throughout high school and at notre dame you will be faced with many instances where doing what is right and moral is harder and more inconvenient than cutting corners or doing the wrong thing. but, what i want you to know is that you should never sacrifice your moral compass for social gratification. your dignity and moral standing are the most important things that you have, and you need to protect them no matter what. so, live life to the fullest, be adventurous, say yes to everything, but never act in a way that goes against your conscience or what you believe; remain strong and grounded even when others do not, it will serve you best and lead to a life well-lived. my next piece of advice is to always live your life with purpose and intention, and never take a single day for granted. as a hardworking student, you will struggle with finding a school-life balance for as long as you will remember. especially in college at notre dame, you will find it hard not to get caught up in the grades, the day-to-day assignments, and an organized routine. but, i am writing to tell you that this needs to change. you cannot live your life expecting to relax and reflect on the future, because that future is not guaranteed. a quote by sister aletheia, a nun that reminds herself daily of her own death, that i believe is incredibly relevant reads, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). through this quote, sister athelia emphasizes to you the importance of not expecting tomorrow–a lesson that is hard to learn and even harder to implement. spencer, you have so many dreams and goals, but you need to learn to live in the moment rather than the future. i am writing this to you in hopes that you will learn this lesson earlier than age 19. live your life, find your routine, but exercise gratitude each and every day for your health, safety, and for the fact that you were given a new opportunity to become the best version of yourself. another lesson that is important to learn is the value of understanding your skillset so that you can be as successful as possible in life. notre dame will greatly assist you in this process, and you will take many career assessments and quizzes to find out where your passions truly lie. but, even at nineteen, you will not know exactly what you want to do, who you are nor who you want to be. because of this, it is important to take time specifically dedicated to discerning who you are. for example, a helpful quote from the undergraduate career services reads, “we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). as i said, notre dame will help you along the journey of career discernment, and this is not something that you need to focus on now, but i want you to take away the wisdom that taking time to figure out who you are is invaluable. as the career services say, giving yourself time to reflect is the best path to self-discovery. so, although you do not need to stress about anything career-related now, take time away from school or chores to simply sit with you and try to understand who you really are, and this will help you out later and lead to a more fulfilling life. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ along the same lines, you must learn how to utilize the resources around you, namely friends or family, to help you figure out who you are and what you are good at. something that i had to learn was that sometimes what i thought i was good at was not what i was best at. in some cases, the people around you help recognize your strengths and weaknesses better than you can. for example, going into college at notre dame i wanted to be a plastic surgeon, but dad knew that this was not where my passions lie. he talked with me about the importance of following my truest dreams, not what i thought will make me most successful. in talking to him, i realized that my aspirations lie in skincare and dermatology. in moreau class, i talked with dad again about who i am and where my motivations lie. one of the quotes that i took away from the conversation is, “you want to be able to look back and believe that your imprint had a positive impact on the lives of others…you desire to please, and receive the greatest happiness when people around you are happy because of your actions” (conversation with my dad moreau fye week 5). dad knows me better than i know myself, and this talk cemented core values that i didn’t consciously know that i had. therefore, i want you to remember that self-reflection is invaluable, but it is important to listen to those around you whom you respect and whose opinions you trust so that you can decipher all of your innermost dreams, strengths, and weaknesses. learning from others is so important and directly in line with living a life well-lived. another piece of valuable advice that i can give you is: actively implement gratitude and reflection into your everyday practice so that you are constantly striving to live a better and more fulfilling life. being grateful for who you are, what you have, and the opportunities that you have been given is such an important aspect of living a life well-lived. a thought-provoking quote from ted speaker tasha eurich that i feel is worth sharing reads, “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week 6). when you decipher the meaning of this quote, you will understand that she is telling you to not complain about why things are happening, but rather ask what you can do. in order to live the most fulfilling life, you need to understand the difference between the why and what questions. for example, in college at notre dame, when i receive a poor grade or an assignment does not go my way, instead of torturing myself with the “why” questions, i look to what i can do next. i am sharing this information with you because this is a crucial mindset change that i wish i had learned earlier. lastly, and probably the most important lesson to learn to live a life well-lived is: you must overcome your own self-focused blinders to be more cognizant, open, and invested in the lives of those around you. treating others with compassion, respect and care is of the utmost importance when it comes to living a fulfilling life. as phrased by his holiness pope francis, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face. the "you" is always a real presence, a person to take care of” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis for ted conferences moreau fye week 7). in this important quote, the pope reminds everyone that it is important for us humans to not become so caught up in our own lives that we “cast others aside” but rather we love others, fully, and consistently. he tells us that we are all equally and beautifully made in the image of god, and it is, therefore, our responsibility to remember our obligation to treat others with respect, tenderness and ground ourselves in humility. ultimately, you are not going to remember that one chemistry test, the essay that you spent hours on, or the extra time you spent studying alone. what you are going to remember, though, is the time spent with amazing, inspiring people, learning about who you really are, and truly enjoying life. notre dame has https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript taught me that achievements are common, i am constantly surrounded by bright, impeccable students, but what matters is what kind of person you are on the inside. spencer, if you take anything away from this letter it is this: selfishness does not lead to true fulfillment, rather it is treating those around you how you would like to be treated that brings the most joy. taking care of others, putting effort into your relationships, and investing interest in the lives of your friends and family will serve you well in the future and will help you to live a life well-lived. i hope that you have enjoyed my letter and were able to take some wisdom from my experiences thus far. as a nineteen-year-old college student, i am still figuring out who i am and what a “life well-lived” means to me. however, since i began actively trying to implement these seven life lessons into my daily life, my everyday experiences have become infinitely better. because of this, i wanted to share my knowledge, stories and aspirations with you in hopes that they could aid in any way. looking back, i wish that i had more perspective in the past, stressed a little less, and had paid more attention to the things that truly mattered in life instead of fretting over the little stuff – but you have the power to change this! so, i hope that my words set you on the right path, and i cannot wait to see where life continues to take you. continue to trust in god’s plan, implement gratitude, stay compassionate and follow each and every one of your dreams. best of luck, future you “how far i’ve come and how far i want to go” it is my mission to live a life well-lived; full of honesty, integrity and unconditional love. usually, we tend to wake up every morning and automatically start our busy days, but often forget to pursue these little things that happen to truly matter the most. practicing self-reflection can make us aware of this type of situation and open our eyes to realizing that life is not just about living, it is feeling alive. this semester allowed me to value family, friendships, mental and physical health more than ever and essentially now, i firmly recognize the importance of it. enjoying each little moment as if is there’s no tomorrow helped me in comprehending iyer’s following words about appreciating our surroundings: “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). for this reason, fostering meaningful relationships and taking personal time is a key aspect for reaching the best and healthiest version of myself. seeing life in a bigger picture has personally helped me to understand that the life lived in the years carries more weight than the years lived in life. father hesburgh has been an inspiration in my journey as he is an example to living a life well-lived from early a very young age. his legacy to the world arose from his dedication to helping others, making good, being spontaneous and doing a difference, distinguishing him from the rest. although the sole purpose of his generosity wasn’t becoming famous, people eventually “respected him as a man of religion” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). the movie portrays how father hesburgh made the most of every moment of his life. wasting time in thinking unimportant things wasn't valuable for him, in opposition, sister alaetheia approaches this from a different perspective. instead of looking to leave a mark on the world to fulfill her life's mission, she spends daily time reflecting on death. we all have different missions in life and hers was “to revive the practice of memento mori, a latin phrase meaning ‘remember your death.’ the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). each person has different ways to value the moments and experiences we live, so i strive to make a difference in this world and be remembered as a person of good just as father hesburgh accomplished throughout his life. i will act according to my passions, giving splendor to my best abilities in the career i enjoy the most. however, how or when will i have a clearer idea if my chosen major is the thing for me? exploring during college must be normalized and “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). by listening to how other people describe the strengths and moments in which they have seen you at your best can help in making clear the making of this decision. accepting that becoming a doctor might not represent my total happiness was something shocking to hear, but once i deeply thought about it, i realized that i should perform my abilities in something else than this (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). i will hear other discernments and take them as constructive criticisms to help me explore a better life well-lived. i strive to achieve all my proposed goals, becoming an honest person, succeeding in everything i do for those around me and for myself. being aware that i will confront difficulties in the process will prepare me to be strong towards whatever comes my way. keeping always in mind the following phrase, “suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god,” will be the key for going on a better pathway (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). during my moments of suffering having company will alleviate my situations, thus, building relationships will contribute in mutually making us achieve a bright future. spending time alone is necessary, but how true is it that “we all need each other” as “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i’, separated from each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” his holiness pope francis, ted moreau fye week seven). with accompaniment we can keep our heads up when experiencing rough times and we must do the same towards our colleagues. as reisenberg said: “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). it is my mission to accompany others in moments of suffering to bring them happiness and motivation. i am willing to help anyone in my community, without mattering their race, ethnicity or sexual orientation since i strive for a spirit of inclusion. as a puerto rican woman with curly hair and color skinned, i have experienced situations that make me understand what minorities groups are subjected to. therefore, i look forward to embracing our society’s differences and uniqueness to make the world a better place. breaking people's echo chambers, which as a matter of fact tend to be “more dangerous than bubbles partly because of their ability to bring us into certain world views,” will help me grow in wisdom and also allow me to understand new perspectives (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo. fy moreau week 10). to conclude, life is complicated, but beautiful. we need to search for happiness, take care of ourselves so we can help others, find our passions, learn from our suffering, search for a good support system. my volunteering experience in la casa de amistad helped me grow as a person and impacted my path towards the best version of myself. i believe that if you can find joy in what you do, you can be a better force for good in the world. also, we need to live everyday to the fullest. all of us have a purpose in life, and all of our experiences are small steps to get us where we need and want to be. when i think of my future, i imagine it full of possibilities, taking each lived experience as a lesson no matter if the outcome isn’t what i expected it to be. : [not] gone but not forgotten liam was born in the early hours of january 25, 2003 to elizabeth and brett gibson. he was the oldest of three children. while he was born in philadelphia, his true home was bethlehem, pennsylvania. bethlehem allowed his natural curiosity and love for adventure to flourish. liam and his friends often roamed the historic district of the city, with its restaurants, pre-revolutionary buildings, and old steel factory. his proximity to hellertown and its rail trail also provided the opportunity for adventure. his parents allowed him much freedom to explore on his bike, trusting him to return home safely by the end of the day. liam attended st. michael the archangel school for elementary and middle school. this small catholic school is the source of many fond memories for him. he often recalled meeting his best friend, dyaln, there in 4th grade with the question, “do you play minecraft?” he got along well with the students and most of his teachers, although he rarely had a good thing to say about mrs. korpics. he then moved on to allentown central catholic high school and was loved by his peers and teachers, becoming both homecoming and prom king. after two unimpressive years on the soccer team, he moved on to pursue cross country and track, sports he loved for the camaraderie of his team. he also played alto saxophone in the band, continuing a musical career his parents had started with piano lessons early in his childhood. he explained that he could never enjoy an instrument while playing alone, much preferring to perform in a band because of the multitude of sounds and people involved. his friends in high school intellectually challenged him as much as his studies. he recalled his late-night debates in a group chat with his friends that expanded his perspective on politics and religion while simultaneously helping to build a very unhealthy sleep schedule. for better or for worse, he always seemed to be busy, ignoring the health benefits of taking time off (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). high school also saw volunteer work take on a much greater importance for liam, mostly because of elizabeth’s passion for it. he often entered jurisdictions much different from his own, breaking through the “illusion of separateness” (chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). he volunteered with his school’s central city project in the community garden, at community dinners, at food banks, and at the local boys and girls club. he also worked extensively with the immigrant communities in allentown. from 6th grade to 10th grade, liam attended a summer camp in upstate new york called deerfoot lodge, “a christian camp for boys.” he often spoke nostalgically of his time spent hiking, fishing, and praying here, and claimed that this rustic camp played the biggest role in making the jump from following his parents’ religion to adopting it as his own. his favorite story had to involve a bear he and the other boys on his hike encountered and subsequently named phat stax for the quantity of food they lost to it. catholicism was very important to liam. he altar served frequently in middle and high school and made sure to attend mass every weekend, no matter what. he was known to read his bible and prayed frequently, although he often said he wished he did so more often. his faith deeply involved introspection; he was always examining the what and the why of his actions to better understand himself (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). in high school he sometimes attended morning mass before school, and he led a kairos retreat his senior year after signing up to do so on a whim. he attended the all-senior retreat as a junior to learn how to lead it the following year, a testament to his bravery. after covid delays in november of his senior year, he finally got to deliver the opening talk in february. in both cases this retreat left him on “a spiritual high,” and after senior year the relationships he formed on the retreat led to changes in his closest circle of friends. in december of his senior year in high school, liam secured a place at the university of notre dame. he said he chose the university because he was frustrated that every school seemed the same and he did not know where to go. the familiarity as elizabeth’s alma mater and its catholic character ultimately won him over. at notre dame, liam pursued a history major. he did not choose to follow in his parents’ footsteps and become a doctor, something they had never pushed on him. he truly pursued his interests, not choosing a major as if it determined his career (“navigating your career journey” by the mereulo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). he always loved learning about the history of bethlehem and the 20th century. liam also chose to study russian language, mostly because he enjoyed learning about the cold war between the united state and the soviet union. considering the current conflict in ukraine, he certainly would have served the world well with his skills and talents (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). liam lived in pangborn hall during his time at notre dame. he was in the first freshman class to live there after it became a guy’s dorm again. he participated extensively in community-building in his dorm, working on the faith commission, leading the journalism committee, attending evening mass frequently, and reading the bible with the bible study group. as a result, he was well-known in his hall. he also continued his tradition of late-night conversations with his close friend and roommate-to-be aidan o’scannlain. they did not shy away from personal topics and liam grew from their friendship (week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). when he met his untimely demise at the hands of his writing and rhetoric research paper, liam’s aspirations were big. he was pursuing a career in foreign affairs, seeking to emulate father hesburgh’s profound ability to unite the most divided groups, thus fostering peace and progress (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). he continued to demonstrate his passion for service and immersion in other jurisdictions, evident in his involvement with mercy works (chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). indeed, he lived a fulfilling life filled with service and centered around faith, seeming to live each day as if it might be his last (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). while he is now [not] gone, he will not be forgotten. capstone integration prof. whittington moreau first-year experience 28 april 2022 pursuit of fulfillment to answer the question “how do i pursue a life well-lived?” one must analyze the components of what a well-lived life truly is. for me, there are three aspects to a well-lived life: connections (relationships, etc), purpose/fulfillment, and a positive impact. in week one i attempted to understand purpose and fulfillment in my life. pico iyer discusses self-reflection and its importance in finding purpose. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico lyer moreau fye week one). throughout the first semester, i found myself getting caught up in minuscule things that simply didn’t affect my life past that very day. taking a step back and really analyzing what i wanted with my life and what i can do to achieve it is something that i found extremely useful this semester. this strategy allows me to hammer down what i really want to do and what i care about most in my life. in week two, i looked at someone who found purpose in their life specifically in their career, which i am actively searching for. “as a commissioned officer in the united states air force, captain michael hillmer ’17 has dedicated his life to the defense of his country. but his duty extends far beyond america’s borders. though his exceptional work ethic has served him well as a cyber operations officer, hillmer’s service also includes work to preserve local https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ landmarks near his home on oahu, hawaii, and to support the families of his fellow military members.” ("domer dozen" by the young alumni recognition initiative moreau fye week two). when looking at the career and life of captain michael hillmer i have found to understand that a fulfilling career path is simply not linear. there are many branches that develop from your careers which make it even more worthwhile. in the captain’s case, he was able to live near his home and support families and his communities whilst concurrently serving and defending the country. for me, going into a computer science career seems like the best opportunity. similar to the captain, this career has infinite possibilities from service to the preservation, there really is no limit to its use cases. i feel that as i continue to move towards my degree i will be able to find a fulfilling application of computer science to the point that he has and an impactful change. week three continues with the idea of fulfillment, however, it offers a unique perspective on why we need to find it. sister alethei argues that we should embrace the idea of death and that it forces us to find purpose. “sister aletheia rejects any suggestion that the practice is morbid. suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by sister alethia moreau fye week three ). we should not distract ourselves with falsehoods. in these falsehoods, we lose the authenticity that life brings and the most profound human ability of adaptation. sister aletheia has decided to live her life with the perspective that she will die someday whereas many believe that life simply keeps continuing. so far i have been living my life in the present, but as i grow older i am sensing a shift in worrying about the future more. i have reached a point where i am not thinking about death, https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html rather the next stage of my life. but i understand the importance of death as a catalyst for finding purpose. week four looks lastly at finding a major and how this moves one to find a purpose. “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." we also view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes. that sounds pretty good, right? i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed maybe it was something a friend for family member wanted you to do or a required course in high school.” ("navigating your career journey" by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). i have found this to be extremely true. the computer science major is located in the engineering school, so it is required that i take generic engineering courses such as chemistry and physics. going through these courses this year really has demotivated me, however, this semester i was able to take two computer science classes that have reenergized my passion and allowed me to be overall happier. happiness is most important and one cannot thrive without it. in week five we swiveled to an interview with a friend. in this interview, i talked with someone who i would say knows me extremely well, or so i thought. after the discussion, i came out of it with these thoughts: “when discussing the issues that were important to me i realized that this side of me had not really been highlighted here. usually, when hanging around these friends we stay on a more positive level and rarely talk about politics etc. i had the feeling that they would simply know my views and stances on specific issues but that was farthest from the truth.” (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). relationships are a huge part of my life and i would argue the most important. this exercise made me realize that i https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing want to connect with these people even further which i believe would put me on a good trajectory to achieving a life well-lived. in week six i continued on the idea of being introspective. before i thought that all introspective thoughts were productive in some way, however, i was extremely wrong. “so if asking why isn’t so helpful, what should we ask? a study by psychologists j. gregory hixon and william swann arrived at a simple answer… the lesson here: asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect.” ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six ). asking why causes you to fixate on the issue in a negative way. we begin to enter a rabbit hole that compounds on itself towards an even more negative self-reflection. thinking about what you are compared to why you are who you present itself with an increasingly more positive way to understand yourself. this lesson helped me in all three of the attributes of a life well-lived. week seven took a look at your relationship with yourself with is one might say more important than your relationship with others. “solidarity is a term that many wish to erase from the dictionary. solidarity, however, is not an automatic mechanism. it cannot be programmed or controlled. it is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone. yes, a free response! when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (tattoos on the heart by fr. boyle moreau fye week seven). rather than looking at our life as something that we simply inherit, looking at it as a gift grants us a more retrospective outlook on its meaning. this realization prompts you to appreciate all life around you and even be there for it which i believe is a key trait to living a good life and one of the fundamental https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40337/files/523777/download?download_frd=1 relationships we must make. week nine discusses the thought of being alone and the significance of having someone there for you. “...when challenges occur, as they always do, walking together, you’re less likely to be arrogant and think you have all the solutions. you’re also more likely to be connected with the real lives of real people, and motivated to figure out together something that moves the relationship forward. accompaniment inverts the impulse of ‘how do we help them?’ into an assertion—’we’re in this together.’ we are connected, tied, and bound together. we need to walk together and learn together, and maybe, together, envision and create something better.” ("teaching accompaniment" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). having someone there to make decisions is extremely important. one could draw a similarity between this and reading your paper out loud to someone. you begin to sense the mistakes you made or perhaps even your flawed thinking. this is especially true when making decisions, we need someone to humble us. this is another key example of the power of relationships and how we must take purpose into account when finding them. week ten dives into impact and how i can make a difference in the communities i am in, specifically notre dame. the du lac states “[w]e welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated. we value gay and lesbian members of this community as we value all members of this community. we condemn harassment of any kind, and university policies proscribe it. we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish.” (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" du lac moreau fye week ten). this quote is directly from the university’s du lac. even though the university explicitly states all are https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ “welcomed” it doesn't necessarily mean that is occurring on the campus. in the du lac the university should highlight how they are making notre dame inclusive rather than simply saying “notre dame is inclusive” because i can guarantee some would share a different opinion. i pondered on this and thought what i could do to make some sort of impact, so i talked with my roommate who is a minority on campus. hearing his perspective and thoughts allowed me to better understand a way to be impactful. these type of conservations i believe are pivotal in living a good life, understanding how those around you are feeling garners you a unique outlook. week eleven brings a different approach to relationships, specifically in avoiding echo chambers. “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion. we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to. seeking out intelligent people who you disagree with and figure out why you disagree with them and taking a step back when we see this not happening.” ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by paul blascho moreau fye week eleven ). both bubbles and echo chambers are extremely dangerous. we tend to surround ourselves with people who share similar opinions and interests, leading to the absence of diverse opinions. this lack of differing opinions creates this superiority factor where once you do hear an opposing opinion, it is completely discredited because you have only been reinforced by others with similar opinions. the importance of stepping back and analyzing the groups and ideas we surround ourselves with is necessary to avoid getting caught up in these echo chambers as described in the video. similar to how we must take time to reflect on ourselves, we must do the same with the people we surround ourselves with. week twelve describes impact and having the courage to consistently do good. a professor here at notre dame describes his thought process on the very subject. “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=217s murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us. i can do something.” ("i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something." by dean cole moreau fye week twelve). dean g. marcus cole discusses the fact that even though he is alive and well, he needs to be an active voice against negativity. we cannot stand by. it is selfish to standby on issues when they are not directly affecting you. george floyd’s death should be a wake-up call to act on issues before they occur. this is the montra i should live my life on. i need to act purposefully at all times. in doing so i will be setting a good example for those around me for the last week we were tasked with writing a personal mission statement which basically was a collection of our thoughts from the previous weeks. in this reflection i continued on the attributes of what i believe a life well-lived is, specifically relationships. “i have found a deep personal connection with quite a few people here during my time and no matter how the rest of my years here go keeping them around me and in my life is a success. this is truly the highest good in life, relationships. my mission is to worry less about monetary aspects of my life and live in the moment with people i truly love because money comes and goes at the end of the day, but true friends remain regardless.” i appreciate what moreau has taught me throughout this year. i have never so critically thought about my life and what i truly want to achieve in it. thank you for a great semester prof. whittington, i wish we were able to spend more time together, but i enjoyed the time we had nevertheless. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ integration 3 quinn 1 catherine wagner moreau fye march 4, 2022 integration three (this eulogy is written from the perspective of my older sister, julia). since the day she was born, caroline has always been my best friend. we did everything together. making up dances in the backyard, climbing trees, fighting over clothes, singing in the shower. literally anything you could think of doing as little kids, caroline was by my side. she always wanted to do everything i could. being the bigger sister, it was my job to look out for her and be a good role model, someone who was always there for her. little does she know, she was that for me. i have and always will forever hold her in my heart. in today’s day and age, it is easy to get caught up in social media, the trends, and popularity. it is easy to forget who oneself is. as pico iyer states, “and the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week one). it is easy to lose sight of what truly matters and is important for salvation. despite this, caroline never seemed to lose sight of who she was. she stayed true to her values, never giving up on what she believed to be right. while i know she was someone who took little time for herself, she was always smiling, showing confidence and love to who she was and what she was about. it was very important to her that she stayed true to her heart and her beliefs, and this was a key aspect of who she was. everyone knew she could always be relied on. quinn 2 as a lover and student of notre dame, caroline always spoke of her devout love for father hesburgh. i know that he was a big role model for her, and she strived to be more like him in her daily life. i can attest that she was successful in this endeavor, portraying much of the same qualities that father hesburgh possessed. as stated in the hesburgh movie, “what made him such an extraordinary figure was he didn’t really belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of fundamental belief in the redeemability in mankind” (hesburgh movie produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). caroline showed these same values in her day to day practices. she always wanted to do the right thing, and 9 times out of 10, she followed through with this. caroline did not care who you were. she did not care what side you were on, what your background was, what your faith was. she cared that you were a human being. she ensured that you be treated with respect and dignity, as she believed everyone deserved to feel loved and welcomed. she would talk to anyone. she did not care who you were; she just cared that you felt appreciated. like father hesburgh, she could connect with all people. she was a friend to all she knew. when i picture caroline, i picture sunshine. no matter how bad her day was, you would always see her happy and smiling. i know this was always how she wanted to be. she once told me that life is all about your mindset. she told me that your mindset dictates your life. i really do think that she lived by these words. in an article written by ruth graham about sister theresa aletheia noble, graham states that “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). while yes, caroline did mostly focus on the bright and shiny parts of life, she was not numb to the fact that suffering and death were a part of life. this was evident in the way she felt things so deeply. she had the biggest heart, quinn 3 always feeling others’ pain and suffering. she was always looking out for others, seeking ways to make their burdens a little less harsh; it was in her nature. caroline was never in anything for the money. she would work a job that paid minimum wage instead of a high paying job solely because all she wanted to do was involve herself in work she genuinely cared about and enjoyed. according to a source, “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey” by meruolo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). as discussed in week 4, it is important not to settle for a career path just because it pays well and is a job. caroline took this message to heart and never settled. she chased after what she loved, no matter the pay or social status asociated with it. it was clear to pretty much anyone that knew caroline what she lived for and desired. my mom told me about a conversation she had recently with caroline about what she wanted in life. when caroline asked my mom what she thought her deepest desires in life were, my mom said that she had no trouble answering this. my mom told caroline that she knew caroline wanted to “give every child a chance in life and give them someone who loves them and is their advocate” (interview with mary quinn moreau fye week 5). while my mom knew caroline so well, i think all of you can attest to this selfless character that caroline displayed. she was always discerning her call, thinking of ways she could make a difference in the world. this just points to her sympathetic, self-giving character. faith in god was a core value in caroline’s life. caroline made it a point, everyday, to spend time with the lord. no matter how busy she was, she would set aside time in the morning when she woke up and at night before she went to sleep to speak with god. throughout the day, she also talked with god. while i do not know really the details of her relationship with god, i quinn 4 know it was a strong one. dr. jihoon kim in the film titled grotto states that “it is about how to respond to suffering with god. it’s the reason how i was able to go through them and still trust in god and leave with joy and gratitude” (grotto by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). as stated in the film, god serves as a very important role when one is going through suffering. he is the best shoulder to lean on, and i truly do not know how people get through suffering without faith. caroline showed this reliance on god in all things. she trusted god with all her heart, even in the toughest of times. caroline’s faith in god served as a great example for me of how to practice faith, and i know it did for so many others. living in communion with others is a key part to life. pope francis emphasizes this idea. in a ted talk, pope francis states that “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). caroline exhibited this desire and need for community in her character and in the way she lived. she always wanted everyone to feel welcomed. if she spotted someone standing alone, not socializing or looking sad, she would be the one to go out of her comfort zone and talk to them. she would make an effort to make all feel included and appreciated. she wanted the world to be a place of love and hope. while she may not have realized, her small acts of kindness did not go unnoticed. she made an impact on so many lives, even the lives of strangers, and i am so sure of it. while caroline has now left us, she is in a much netter place. she is with our lord up above, which is where she has always longed to be. in communion with our savior, caroline is continuing to make an impact on the lives of others. she will continue to make this impact, and she will be remembered as a woman of love, compassion, hope, and desire to do good. to know her was to love her. quinn 5 thank you all, and continued prayers for each and every one of you. we can do this. caroline would want us to continue out this love and make the world a better place. quinn 6 sources week one: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week two: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week three: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week four: https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5: (interview with mary quinn): https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/ edit week 6: https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration my mission for life my mission in life is to be happy. to be more than content in everything i pursue (“writing a personal mission statement activity” by moreau fye week 13). i want the source of my happiness to be from genuine interactions and experiences, not superficial material things and ingenuine relationships. in the next three years, my life will not be “centered around money and things”, instead it will be centered around relationships with people (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). i have realized that i make most of my decisions with money in the back of my mind, for example, selecting my major and the activities i choose to participate in. my main concern has always been my financial stability in the future. however, i will work to change this mindset and prevent it from influencing my decisions and relationships. the major and activities i choose will be based on my own interests and passions, not money. moreover, i plan to reach out to more people and foster new relationships. genuine relationships and experiences with others will bring me greater fulfillment than wealth. i want to approach life with an open and positive mindset. i will not see each day as a burden, instead i will view each day as an opportunity to grow and discover new things about myself. during my time at notre dame, i will not approach each day with a perfectionist attitude. i hope to develop the mindset that i do not always have to excel at everything (“conversation with terrie shen (mom)” by moreau fye week 5). i will achieve this by heeding my mom's advice which is to “take it easy” and realize that sometimes doing my best is enough (“conversation with terrie shen (mom)” by moreau fye week 5). i want to discover my passion and pursue it with purpose. during my time at notre dame, i will try new things to help me discover my passion. moreover, i will treat “planning [my] career [and future…] like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). instead of believing that the major and career i chose will determine the rest of my life, i will have the mindset that my major decision and first career after college are not the end-all. college is a place to discern my passions and learn from my failures. i will treat whatever career i choose after college as a trip and continuously plan for future trips. however, if i lose sight of my purpose in what i am doing, then i will take a “step farther back and stand still [...] to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i will also respond to obstacles with a positive attitude and see them as an opportunity to grow. i will accomplish this by asking “what” questions [to] help [me] create a better future as opposed to “why” questions, which “trap [me] in the past” (“the right https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). if i fail an assignment or get rejected from a position, i will not ask “why” it happened to me and focus on my weaknesses, instead i will ask what i could do better next time or what parts were my strengths. by looking at the larger picture when i face a setback, i will become better at self-reflection and self-improvement. my mission in life is also to open myself to people different from me. to engage in meaningful conversations with others and become more aware of the world i live in. i want to expand my social circle and form meaningful relationships. i will leave my comfort zone and adapt to new environments. i will accomplish this by consciously preventing myself from “surrounding [myself] with people that agree with [me]” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). if i remain in an “echo chamber”, i will be limiting myself and becoming less globally minded (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). in the next three years, i will “make a conscious decision and effort to expand [my] circle” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). currently, i attend class and leave immediately without interacting with any of my classmates. in order to break out of my ideological bubble, i will actively try to start conversations with people in my classes. i will put myself in uncomfortable situations where my beliefs might be challenged; however, i know that, in doing so, i will be broadening my perspective and understanding of the world. to achieve my happiness in life, i must stay true to myself. i will continue to stand up for myself and what i believe. i will not let others tell me what is right and wrong. my goal is to help notre dame actually fulfill its “spirit of inclusion” mission (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). following in father hesburgh's footsteps, i will bring attention to the fact that “those who ignore history are condemned to repeat its mistakes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). racism against minorities has been prevalent for too long in the united states and at notre dame progress still needs to be made. at notre dame, i will actively speak up for minorities at the institution. i will start conversations about race and my experiences with anyone that will listen. moreover, i will urge the university to address the racial microaggressions caused by “white fragility” and the exclusion felt by minority groups (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin di angelo moreau fye week 10). however, i will keep in mind that “solidarity” does not mean being “the voice of the voiceless.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). my aim will be to uplift “those who have no voice" to have a voice and be heard (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing in order to fulfill my mission, i know i need to respect my own values. i value my independence and freedom in my life (“conversation with terrie shen (mom)” by moreau fye week 5). i want to make choices for myself without doubts or negative influences. however, i will learn to ask for help and look to people i trust for guidance. for example, i will attend more office hours with my professors to “help [me] discern whether or not [i am] good at [something]” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). and in turn, i will share my experiences and wisdom with those in similar positions as me. although the journey of fulfilling my personal mission will be challenging, i know that my happiness will be worth more than any obstacle i face. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831?module_item_id=146508 moreau fye integration three the fullest possible extent today we celebrate the life of . catherine lived her life to the fullest possible extent, as if each and every day could be her last. she kept her passions and values ever present in her mind so as to ensure that she was always working to be the best version of herself. she often reminded herself and others that, “‘remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). she also tried to make the most of whatever life threw her way. while she knew that “when hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have,” she tried not to fall into the trap of doing so (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). she took every obstacle in her path as an opportunity to grow and flourish as a person. catherine found these abilities to find the good in every situation and keep her dreams and aspirations always at the front of her mind at a young age. this helped her to discern her steps towards her future, which we can all agree she successfully took. as a young adult at the university of notre dame, catherine found her interests to lie in the business world and studied in the mendoza college of business. she did not however, immediately know what specific work she would do in her future, and often thought against the “commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). catherine was able to find the field of consulting, which enabled her to do work that combined her skills with her newly developed concern for environmental matters. her father remarked to her during her freshman year of college that, “i have seen your passion for sustainability grow a lot recently and i am proud of how you have implemented it into your life and career goals” (interview with patrick wolf by moreau fye week 5). catherine believed that doing good in her career was of the utmost importance. as a lover of the outdoors and natures unhindered beauty, she knew that something needed to be done to reverse the effects of society on the environment. she worked to make a difference throughout her life and greatly impacted the state of the environment for the better through her work. by working with large corporations to develop more sustainable practices, she was able to spread her knowledge and passion throughout the business world. she worked to “...talk across differences and create a trust, create a mutual understanding” between those who were opposed to her efforts and those who had a strong belief in the good that can be done through sustainability (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). while her skills in bridging work related gaps were certainly crucial to her career, she used those skills more often in her personal life. catherine was a strong believer in vulnerability, and she often focused her own efforts on and urged others to follow fr. greg boyle’s advice that “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j moreau fye week 7). she placed great emphasis on her relationships with her family and friends, and she was always there for others when they needed her. her compassion spread throughout her community. catherine was known for going out of her way to ensure that her relationships were strong, and she helped others learn how to forge similar connections, as well. her willingness to be open and honest with whomever she was talking to allowed others to trust her deeply. catherine had a great understanding of others’ needs, and she was an excellent person to confide in. understanding why others acted the way they did or made the choices they made was one of her many strengths, and her ability to do so is one of the many reasons that she will be so dearly missed. obviously, catherine had quite a busy life of cultivating strong relationships, aiding her growing family throughout their life, and working towards a more sustainable future in her career. however, one thing that we can all learn from her is that “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity; that’s why wise souls from every tradition have spoken of it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). catherine was very adamant that everyone should take time out of their day to relax and step back from the stresses of everyday life. she was very open to introspection and often evaluated her current place in the world based on her happiness and her ability to contribute to the good of others. she was able to deeply appreciate the little things in life, which we can all agree are often what can keep us going through hard times, especially the loss of a dear friend like catherine. it is nearly impossible to capture the full picture of catherine’s life in words, but i hope that i have been able to give just a glimpse into the impact that she had on the world around her. she will be forever remembered by those around her as someone who brought light to even the darkest days and was constantly working to better her surroundings. while we will never know what she thought as she passed from this life, it is quite likely that she was grateful for the chance she had to make her own impact, no matter how big or small, here on earth. catherine would certainly be proud to know that we can all take her life as an example of one that was certainly lived to the fullest possible extent. a mother’s farewell first of all, i would like to thank everyone for being here today to honor the life of katie. she had an impact on all of our lives, even if it was small, and her unbreakable spirit will forever be remembered. as a mother, it is my job to teach my kids life lessons, but katie would teach me some. in her short eighteen years on this earth, she taught me more than i would have ever believed she would. she was the kind of person everyone loved to be around. i loved how she always wanted to go on adventures and try new things, something i could definitely take notes on and just how she truly loved life. she loved meeting and getting to know new people and hanging out with friends and family. as a mother, it is the hardest thing to lose your child, but i am grateful to have had eighteen years with her. katie was always extremely motivated. whether it was in her gymnastics career, academics, or volunteering, she worked extremely hard all the time. she loved to keep herself busy, always wanting to be doing something. sometimes her busy schedule caused her stress, but she would never want to take a break. i would tell her these are the times we need breaks the most. stress is contagious and i would tell her that if she took a break now, she would be more productive later. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week one). “but i can’t fall behind,” she would complain, which made me laugh because i knew how she never wanted to fall behind. however, she would eventually listen and feel better after. i admired her incredible work ethic. katie loved to live in the moment, but she also always liked to have plans. for example if we were going on vacation, she wanted to know what activities we were doing each day, what restaurants we were going to each night, etc. she would have her life mapped out, but if she ever decided she wanted to change these plans, she was able to redirect. when she thought about the direction of where her life was headed, she believed that whatever she was doing should bring her joy, it should tap into her talents and gifts, and should be a genuine service to the people around her (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three). now she didn’t strictly apply these questions to everything she did, but they were a general guide that helped her realize where she wanted her life to go. as most of you would know, katie took a lot of pride in her academics and studied at the university of notre dame. she was planning to eventually go to physical therapy school and wanted to work for a pro/college sports team or team usa. this wasn’t a random decision, katie was inspired to go into physical therapy from gymnastics. always having to go to doctors appointments and physical therapy she’s light into those careers for her and piqued her interest. she took all the ap science classes she could, shadowed a physical therapist, and was majoring in science-business and minoring in compassionate care in medicine at notre dame (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). sadly, she was taken too soon and was never able to achieve her career goal, however i know if she could have, she would. while katie lived a busy life, she was very in touch with herself and was a big advocate of mindfulness. when life got stressful, she loved to meditate. it always calmed and centered her (“ways to practice mindfulness” by the mcdonald center for student well-beingmoreau fye week six). katie truly valued the relationships in her life. she was a people person and would do anything for her friends and family. she truly believed that all people are connected and need to support each other. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven). katie thought that no matter what, everybody has something in common and can put their differences aside and work together to build a better future. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). katie and i were very close. as a mother, i was lucky enough to have a daughter that i could enjoy life with. we loved to go shopping, get massages, enjoy the beach, and go out to dinner together. i just loved spending time with her, and it was sad not having her home when she went to college. we still talked on the phone, but i missed her. i remember one day she called me about an assignment. she asked me some deep questions about herself and we had a conversation about them. these questions included asking about what social issues were most important, what she values in life, and some others (conversation guidemoreau fye week five). we had never really discussed these things, but actually talking about them really showed me what an incredible young woman she had turned into. we were all blessed to have met katie and she will truly be missed. she was a beautiful person inside and out and was taken from us too soon. we cannot bring her back, but we can keep her memory alive, so i encourage everyone to take the values that katie believed in and apply them to your life. talk to a new person, go on an adventure, and try a new thing. katie is survived by her mother, suzanne, her father, josh, and her brother, matthew. she was truly a force for good in this world and while she was only with us for eighteen years, she lived an incredibly fulfilling life. thank you all for coming to the service, we are grateful to have all of you in our lives and your support means so much to us. now that this semester is over, i can state that i learned many different lessons. i think that i am getting closer to the person that i want to be, “this great leader impacting his community for greater social change”. to better understand what this dream implies, i think that it is important to share all my thoughts on leadership and the characteristics of a leader. leadership is a phenomenon that is at once, ambiguous, and elusive. the concept in itself is vague in my opinion. it is discussed in the political world, in the business world, in sports activities, in cultural life, in short, everywhere. it refers to human beings in society, subject to various authorities. to grasp its essence and substance even a little, it is necessary to tackle the understanding of human nature itself, of interpersonal relationships, particularly relationships of authority, and of life in an organized society. it is a vast field of observation that we can analyze deeply. one could devote a lifetime to this analysis without exhausting all its wealth. some might see this as some kind of impossible task and give up. for my part, i see it as a real opportunity! i seek to look at the examples of past leaders in human society to learn from them and grow accordingly. one important thing that we should reflect on is the link between the understanding we have of leadership, our ways of talking about it or recounting this experience, and the personal ways that we have of being leaders. to assume leadership, the fact of telling it can have an important impact, it allows us to better understand it. this is what leads us to propose a central place for storytelling in leadership research and training. but what we learn from leadership is more in the order of understanding than of the order of explanation, and appeals to subjectivity, whether that of the leader himself, or that of the person that is being guided by a leader. in doing so, we discover that leaders build themselves a “story” to tell in order to be able to influence others. if this story appeals to the subjectivity and imagination of the leader, it does not mean that it cannot relate to reality, and it is also by its content that the leader is deemed credible by his collaborators. because highlighting the subjectivity and judgment of the leader does not make us forget that leadership is a social phenomenon. if the leader manages to have an influence, it is because he exercises a form of authority recognized by his peers, be it intellectual and moral, rather than formal, and because he assumes responsibility for it. by exercising some authority and assuming the responsibilities that come with it, one can see a rapprochement between management and leadership. but we must be careful not to confuse leadership skills with management skills. the result of such an amalgamation has ultimately only been to reduce leadership to behaviors or skills that one can acquire in a training program. in my opinion, leadership cannot be reduced to recipes or political or communication skills. nor is it a skill, not even a set of skills that one would have acquired or could have acquired formally. all intelligent management is necessarily artisanal: it is done by people, who manage other people, producing goods or services aimed at customers. subjectivity is present everywhere. but what about leadership? leadership comes not so much from the position of authority that one occupies as from the direction or power that comes or emanates from the person himself, and which therefore differs from one person to another. what makes the leadership of one does not necessarily make the leadership of another. it is therefore as much, if not more, the personal differences as the similarities likely to be observed from one leader to another that we are interested in when evaluating leadership. since it is a vast, rich and inexhaustible concept, which it is impossible to clearly define, it seems easier to accept that there will always be a "margin of error in our reflection". we can nevertheless understand it, intuitively, implicitly, and even unconsciously. this understanding will be partial and claiming to explain it with certainty is utopian. this does not prevent people from understanding leadership. they "understand" but do not venture too much to explain the phenomenon, because the explanations are too simple and unsatisfactory. this position leads us to take a more realistic look at what we know about leadership and what can be done to develop it in those who have a certain potential, regardless of the field in which they exercise it. leaders themselves subjectively grasp what drives them, and what exists within them that can become a leadership ferment. generally, when the talent exists, they have a subjective certainty of it, a critical capacity that leads them to know, well before the others, their strengths and their weaknesses. it is this “subjective knowing” that is the basis of judgment and the ability to learn and change. objective knowledge is always essential, but the person's subjectivity is what determines his leadership the most. subjectivity manifests itself above all in judgment, this faculty of the mind allowing one to judge well of things that are not the object of immediate knowledge, nor of a vigorous demonstration. this is very much the realm of leadership. through this course, i had to make many different reflections on my own perceptions of leadership. i was challenged many times as i was asking myself questions like “what do i really care about?”, “what do i want to do in life?”. every time, i answered the same thing, “change haiti”. it is not a simple task. however, the often powerful responses that i received when i submitted my responses gave me the strength to fight daily for that dream. one of the most important things that i retained from the responses can also be associated with leadership. i remember getting the advice that there is no such thing as a perfect time to step up and start the battle. as a result, i will reflect a lot on those plans over the summer and i might also go to the south of haiti to help people from this community. integration two professor hnatusko moreau fye integration two 12/3/2021 a true freshmen: stumbling through the first semester throughout the semester, i have had the expectation that i need to have a friend group. i see so many other freshmen, both at notre dame and at other schools, that have found a group of people that they consistently hang out with. while i have met all types of friendly people, i do not think that i can call many people close friends, even after knowing them for two months. i often yearn for consistency and sometimes feel left out when i see people who have found such stability in social life. whenever i feel this way, i remind myself of emery bergmann, the college student who also experienced such loneliness and even released a video expressing her feelings. she gives advice to college freshmen, saying, “...by putting myself out there, i found so many communities on campus to invest myself in, and where i knew i would be happily received.” (“advice from a formerly lonely college student” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine). i am certain that my feelings of loneliness will not fade for the rest of my freshman year. however, i am also certain that i will have the ability to navigate these feelings and can continue to put myself out there as bergmann advises. throughout my life before college, i thought that many occurrences in my life, especially in the ones where i got hurt emotionally, were unfixable and to be avoided at all costs. at notre dame, i have learned that my previous mindset was incorrect and even prevented me from traveling down many pathways that would have opened other opportunities. my previous mindset was built on a fear of failure, specifically failure that would wound me emotionally. my time in college has taught me differently so far because of the sheer amount of experiences i have every day with different people, classes, and professors. by watching the examples of others who take risks to deepen their understanding and love of their passions, i am empowered to do the same, even if the risk means that i may experience hurt. week ten’s topic of encountering brokenness helped me change my perspective even more. i loved the philosophy behind kintsugi. kirsten helgeson, a woman who leads a kintsugi workshop, puts it simply: “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together” (“women find healing through kintsugi workshop” by grotto moreau fye week ten). i knew in the past that i am breakable, but now i know that i am mendable too. college, in addition to growing academically, is meant as a place to help students grow in character. i hope to grow in bravery knowing that though i may encounter failure, i will heal and emerge stronger. i have never been in a place with such diversity of thought as i am right now in college. both my elementary and high schools consisted of very small communities with very similar backgrounds: we all lived in the same city, had similar socioeconomic status, similar ways of life, and even uniforms for all thirteen years. i have been friends with some of the same people since https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/heal/find-healing-through-kintsugi-art/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau i was in kindergarten. when i came to notre dame, i came to appreciate the wide range of identities all brought together in the small town of south bend. one example of this is in my writing and rhetoric class, in which we are focusing on the rhetoric around the american prison industrial complex. given the many layers and implications of the prison industrial complex, it can easily become a source of controversy and debate. therefore, before we even began to learn about the topic, our class created a contract to ensure respectful and productive discussion. one of the main ideas in the contract that stuck out to me was that we were to be open-minded listeners––a role that is simple yet entails more than just listening. in week eleven, a quote from parker j. palmer’s “thirteen ways of looking at community” reminded me of my writing and rhetoric class’s goal: “hard experiences—such as meeting the enemy within, or dealing with the conflict and betrayal that are an inevitable part of living closely with others—are not the death knell of community: they are the gateway into the real thing” (“thirteen ways of looking at community” by parker j. palmer moreau week eleven). with an increased diversity of thought, the possibility of disagreement becomes stronger. however, i believe that this is what makes diversity of thought so much more desirable. through respectful communication, communities grow when dealing with disagreement. i will navigate all of my future disagreements with the goal of growth for others, myself, and the community through listening, learning, and educating. reflecting on the past three months, the period of time from move-in to thanksgiving break has been a long series of many failures and many victories. in terms of failures, or rather, “bumps in the road,” my college academic career has challenged me like nothing i have ever experienced before. there are numerous times when i have contemplated switching my major or turning in subpar work due to sheer exhaustion and confusion toward course material. i have often felt lost in my college social life and have found myself missing home many times. during week twelve, we explored the concept of hope, especially in the context of cycles, during moreau. one quote that stuck out to me was from c.s. lewis’s “the screwtape letters”: “as long as [humans live] on earth periods of emotional and bodily richness and liveliness will alternate with periods of numbness and poverty...some of [god’s] special favorites have gone through longer and deeper troughs than anyone else” (“the screwtape letters” by c.s. lewis moreau week twelve). in this quote, the devilish screwtape writes to his subordinate wormwood about human nature and behavior. screwtape observes that human life is fickle and erratic; humans persist through never-ending cycles of highs and lows. as i mentioned above, this first semester highly aligns with screwtape’s observations. thus, in addition to my failures, i have experienced many moments of joy, from bonding with my roommate to trying out exciting technologies through my engineering design class. through the next three and a half years of college, i will keep in mind screwtape’s observations: cycles are intrinsic in human life. i know that the “troughs” make the peaks so much sweeter and that i should not take any of my time here at notre dame for granted, both the highs and the lows. http://couragerenewal.org/parker/writings/13-ways-of-looking-at-community/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/27120/files/188364/download?download_frd=1 integration 3 moreau fye professor taylor 4 march 2022 accomplishment with care is dead. although his life was cut short, those who were closest to him recognized that, although imperfect, tom accomplished a lot in his life. more importantly than this accomplishment alone, though, was the manner in which he accomplished. tom cared. he cared about what he was doing. he cared about the quality of his work. but most importantly, he cared about the people around him. one of the first things you should know about tom’s life is that he was always willing to put his ego, and sometimes dignity, on the line to try something new. there was never a reasonable challenge that tom wouldn’t give a go. during his life, tom recognized that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). whether it was trying out almost every sport in the book, from football to curling, or simply saying yes to whatever bizarre adventures his friends suggested – tom did his best to experience the world. more than just experiencing the most he could, tom accomplished the most he could. fr. hesburgh, one of the most accomplished presidents of the university of notre dame, knew all about accomplishment. as a documentary about him states, “fr. hesburgh was non-partisan, he was willing to get in there, roll up his sleeves, and figure out, how do you come up with answers?” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). much like hesburgh, tom understood the value of alternate perspectives. in everything he did, he took https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 exceptional care to balance what he thought to be right, what others thought to be best, and what he knew to be true. in a reflection after a conversation with his mom on discerning his path in life, tom wrote,“how i feel and what i value is not always conveyed in how i act and that i need to take more care with my actions to ensure i am doing things that i would want to see myself doing” (moreau fye week five). for those of you who knew tom more loosely, it's likely that you knew a guy that got stuff done. if you wanted results, you went to tom. and although this aspect of his life was important to him and true, those closest to tom knew that he valued so much more than outcomes and outcomes alone. sometimes, tom got into his own head. sometimes, tom cared too much. too much about his own abilities. too much about how he could’ve done more. tasha eurich, in her ted article advised, “this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). tom experienced this reality first hand. despite this, when things got rough – when the world seemed poised against him or when everything he had valued highest fell or got torn apart – the best of tom came out. tom moved quickly and kept himself busy. it is rare that on a given day you would find tom doing absolutely nothing. in fact, tom worked to speed his life up. if he had excessive free time then that time should be used to accomplish something more. pico iyer pointed out in his ted article, “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). although tom very rarely took the time to slow down his life for his own well being – he would drop anything when his friends or family needed him. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ more than anything else in his life, tom valued love. tom recognized that love accomplished the greatest good. by loving those around him, tom made the world a better place. as many of us know, love is not easy. love can hurt. love can make you question everything. love can make you suffer. tom loved deeply, and sometimes, tom hurt deeply. yet even in his worst times, even when the goal that tom had worked towards with every ounce of his soul, for 3 years of his life, was suddenly and obviously no longer obtainable, tom projected his love outward. fr. ted boyle described, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” ( “chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). tom recognized this. in some of the greatest turmoil of his life, tom sought new jurisdictions. sister aletheia from the daughters of st. paul once said,“remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). tom is no longer with us, but tom acted, to the best of his ability, to live each day in a way he might if it were his last. tom did not know he was going to die, but we all will, and many of us will not see it coming. you do not have to uncover a groundbreaking scientific discovery to make a difference. you do not have to solve poverty or bring about world peace. you can make a difference each and every day by simply being who you are, and being that well. i would like to say that tom achieved that in his life. to conclude this eulogy on tom’s short, yet meaningful life, i want to stress who tom really wanted to be in his life. yes, tom wanted to achieve great things and he did. yes, tom wanted to experience the world for all it had to offer and he took a lot of steps to do so. but more https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/15800 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html than anything, tom wanted those around him to feel loved and valuable. that’s who thomas king was and that is what he wants to be remembered for. moreau integration two assignment encountering horizons: reflecting on my first semester at notre dame what are some of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester? one of the most important questions i’ve asked this semester focuses on the intersection between race and education. specifically, i’ve wondered how notre dame can further emphasize the importance of diversity and bias awareness/recognition into our classes. during my high school years, i felt that my school made great efforts to integrate these critical topics into all courses. for example, while most schools choose to designate conversation about the issues of racism and implicit bias for subjects like english and history, my school connected these systems to math and science as well. one particular moment i remember is discussing the factors that have played in upholding engineering as the very male and white dominated field it remains today in my sophomore year physics class. frankly, it was in these unexpected classes that the message of moving towards change was instilled in me the most. it showed me that race truly is an ongoing conversation that needs to be addressed in every regard. for these reasons, i feel that it is necessary notre dame continue this movement in their unexpected sectors as well. agustin fuentes’s “diversity matters” talk from week eleven supports this same need. in his speech, fuentes states that “exposure and access to different types of people, to different life experiences, to different ways of seeing the world offers insight and allows us to be in a position to think about change.” i especially want to highlight the last part of that sentence, “different ways of seeing the world.” i believe that addressing racism through the lens of english and history is not enough we instead need to tackle it on all fronts. while some of my classes like marketing have begun to do this, i hope that more of my classes will continue to do so in my time here. (“diversity matters!” by agustin fuentes moreau fye week eleven) what has grown or decreased in importance as a result of my notre dame journey thus far? when i first started my college experience i was hyper aware of the content that people were posting on social media. in fact, i was on instagram so much that it began to damage my mental health. i was constantly comparing myself to the pictures i saw on my feed. not only was i comparing myself to the people in my grade that i had just followed from notre dame, but i was also comparing myself to my friends from home who seemed to be having the time of their lives in their new colleges. i felt the pressure https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=d14a0472-9c0e-44ea-bd39-53c67ee1d436 to make as many friends as everyone else seemed to be making and live the perfectly balanced social and academic life everyone seemed to be living. however, as i began to become grounded in my new surroundings, i realized that social media should not impact the way i see my life. i should instead focus on my own well being and happiness. furthermore, i realized that social media is really essentially just fake. one particular quote that stood out to me in week 9’s “advice from a formerly lonely college student” article comments on the negative consequences of believing in the false expectations that social media perpetuates. in her article, emery bergmann talked about how instagram “became a platform for comparison,” one that led her to evaluate every picture her friends posted, determining whether their college looked more fun than hers or if they had made more friends than her. knowing that so many people had gone through the same comparison struggles i had gone through comforted me. it helped me understand that most people at notre dame feel the same way, even though their instagram posts might not show it. i believe that it is important we begin to be more honest on social media, or at least in the conversations we have about it. this way we can begin to see that no one’s life is as picture perfect as it seems. (“advice from a formerly lonely college studenterly-lonely-college-student.html” by emery bergmann moreau fye week nine) what was previously “black and white” that is now more ambiguous, nuanced, or complicated? i came from a very liberal leaning bubble of a school. being constantly surrounded and supported by those who felt very similarly to me, i was never really challenged by the views of other people. in fact, anyone who dared go against the norm was immediately shunned and disliked by the majority of the school community. in all honesty, i too participated in this culture. i would label anyone who went against my views as a bad person, failing to recognize their entire humanity. it was very “black and white” to me anyone who thought differently from me immediately became the “other.” however, coming to notre dame i’ve grown to realize that these divisions are much more nuanced than i once believed. at notre dame, there is much more diversity of thought. people are coming from all over the country, from cities and from suburbs, from big schools and from small schools, from religious families and agnostic families. there is no way we wouldn’t all think differently because of the cultures we have been raised in. and thus, i’ve begun to understand that it’s not healthy to simply disregard someone just because of their views. father jenkins’s address in week ten speaks on this same idea of division that is so present in our country today, calling notre dame students to look the other way and instead heal this warfare is through love: https://www.nytimes.com/2018/10/09/well/family/advice-from-a-formerly-lonely-college-student.html “love is the greatest commandment — and hatred is at the heart of the greatest sins. hatred is the great destroyer — the great divider. hatred is more dangerous to us than any other threat, because it attacks the immune system of our society — our ability to see danger, come together and take action.” (“wesley theological seminary commencement” by rev. john i. jenkins moreau fye week ten) this quote is important for me to remember since i’ve often focused too much on my differences with the “other” that i missed opportunities to compromise, come together, and take action. it won’t be easy, but no progress ever is. another quote that comments on the difficulty of taking these actions is in the “holy cross and christian education” document of week twelve: “the contemplation of new ideas and needs beyond our comfort zones requires a sacrificial willingness to put at risk everything that we think we already know. we need to have hope in that process to stick with it, to believe that what is born of questioning beliefs previously taken for granted will lead us to a new and better understanding of our vocation as citizens in this world and for the next.” (“https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190606?module_item_id=107411” by rev. james b. king moreau fye week twelve) this quote recaps the truth that we must push the boundaries of our comfortableness in order to make progress as a society. this does not mean that we have to reach an agreement with every person that differs from us, but it does mean that we should always be open to listening. https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://president.nd.edu/homilies-writings-addresses/wesley-theological-seminary-commencement/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/23665/files/190606?module_item_id=107411 thomas toole taylor kelly moreau fye 3 march 2022 the kid who wanted everyone around him to succeed thomas toole was a kind, loving, and compassionate man, who unfortunately passed away at the young age of 18 years old. he leaves behind his mother, father, stepmother, three siblings (johnny, maggie, and jake), and three step-siblings (jackson, katherine, and jonathan). his friends and family called him tommy, and he was always looking to include everyone in everything he did. tommy was always extremely concerned with the well being of others, but no one more than his mother, jennifer. tommy was so involved in the lives of others that he would often make his days worse so that yours could be better. a person’s life who resonated with tommy was the life of fr. theodore hesburgh, the former president of the university of notre dame, as he was always looking to influence others in a positive way whether it was at the university, within the church, or around the world. he was a great man who would not stand for injustices anywhere, which is an idea that tommy wanted to live by in his own life (hesburgh movie moreau fye week two). standing up for others was a crucial part of his identity, and he wanted to be remembered through his influence and treatment on those who had the chance to meet him during their lives. as the first-born, tommy developed a very close bond with his parents as a young child. he spent countless hours with his mother, learning the states and capitals, playing basketball in the driveway, and attending spring training games at tucson electric park. he was introduced to sports at a young age, and immediately they became a passion of his. when he was young, tommy excelled in sports, sometimes being the best player on the field in baseball, soccer, and basketball. however, as he got older he lost his distinction as one of the best players, but still made his impact in other ways. in a conversation with his father, he was told that when he was at his best was during his high school basketball team’s run to winning a state championship (conversation with my dad moreau fye week five). he was extremely proud of his influence on the team, yet he only scored 1.3 points per game. he was always the loudest cheerleader on the bench, looking to support his teammates through every possible avenue. hyping up the crowd, other bench players, and his teammates on the floor, he always had an influence on the game even though he rarely stepped onto the court. on the academic side of things in high school, tommy was not always as aggressive in his pursuits like he was on the field or court. he was very gifted intellectually, yet he struggled to find a desire to push himself as hard as he could in school. if he was still here, he would tell you that he would get complacent with his schoolwork, partly because he was immature, and partly because he felt satisfied with his performance, even if it was not as good as he could have done. this quote is a quote that tommy encountered in his moreau class that reminded him that there is always something greater calling him, and to never be satisfied with his current state. ‘“the issue of my calling is settled.” vocations lead to vocations! it may raise other questions, and there’s no point where you can say that, “i do not have to ask any more questions”’ (three key questions by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). in college, during his first-year as a gateway student at holy cross college and the university of notre dame, tommy was able to realize his full potential as a student. he pushed himself extremely hard and achieved a 4.0 gpa for the first time in his life during the first semester. on the social side of things, tommy wanted to include everyone as a part of his jurisdiction in life. when choosing friends and people to interact with, the color or skin or background of people didn’t matter to tommy. his two closest friends from home, diego and nico, were both hispanic, and came from much different upbringings than tommy did. with all of the differences that they had growing up, they were able to find so many commonalities to create an unbreakable bond for a lifetime between them. he wanted to be a part of everyone’s circle, as reflected in this quote. “somewhere, in the jurisdictional locale where judgment used to claim us, a remarkable commonality rushes in, and the barriers that exclude are dismantled” (jurisdiction by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). the diversity of tommy’s jurisdiction was something that he was extremely proud of, as his friends came from anywhere and everywhere. the connections he made in college were different from the ones from home, as his peers grew up in ways similar to himself. still, he developed many relationships that would have lasted for his entire life. it didn’t matter what your life was like to tommy, if he perceived you to be genuine he wanted to have you around, it was as simple as that. although tommy’s life was very positive from his high school years onward, he struggled after his parents’ separation when he was in the fourth grade. his middle school years were happy, but life at home caused much internal conflict for tommy. he tried so hard to make everything right between his parents, and make life easier for his beloved mother, but there was only so much he could do as a kid. he often blamed himself for problems, and calculated his words to his parents, withholding from saying things to prevent a fight between them. as he got older, he came to a revelation that no matter how hard he tried, there was nothing he could do about the situation. “in other words, we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there is a wrong way) by tasha eurich, moreau fye week six). this truth came easier to him as he saw his mom succeed, and helped her along every step of the way, from her first day of community college to her first day on the job as a nurse. as much as tommy overanalyzed every move that he made, it never amounted to anything in the end. if there was something he wished he could do over again it would be to worry less about things he couldn’t control and let everything play out. he found peace and stillness in his mind in his later years. tommy realized that self-reflection was positive, but there was a point that it negatively impacted his mental health. his experiences allowed him to realize that no matter how much effort you give, not everything will go your way. tommy had plans to study international economics in college, and go into the labor force with a variety of options. he was not exactly sure what he wanted to do after college, but he knew that studying economics would give him many opportunities. something that he found crucial to his future endeavors was the opportunity to be a leader, which is something that he learned through the career examinations in his moreau first-year experience course (career surveys moreau fye week 4). being a leader had always been a staple of tommy’s personality, which made it so important to him in choosing his future career. one thing that tommy was developing in his college life was the ability to slow down. a quote from pico lyer especially resonated with tommy in letting things come to you and relaxing. “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer moreau fye week one). sitting still for a little while, putting down his phone and just relaxing was something that helped tommy manage his way through his first year of college with minimal stress. the importance of letting things come to you and not being overly eager was something that tommy learned as he got older. no matter how bad he wanted something, he reminded himself that he would eventually get there. there was no magic shortcut for tommy to reach his goals in life. while he is gone, tommy’s legacy lives on through all six of his siblings, real and step. he loved his siblings dearly, and all he wants for them is success in all of their endeavors. they know that they can always reach him through prayer, as he would do with his family members who were not with us while he was here. he also hopes that his mother will continue the recent success in her career, and his father continues to be a great dad for all seven of his kids. tommy lived a fulfilling and influential life, albeit he was only here for a very short time. he will be missed dearly as he rests with the lord above. kuipers taylor kelly moreau 28 february 2022 raleigh’s eulogy “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (week 1). all too often throughout life, we get lost in the details. the conversations. the birthdays. the classes. the trips. the stresses. the sufferings. the changes. we get so bogged down in the mundane, the everyday, and the tedious that we forget to appreciate the entirety of life. on this day, however, i want to take a step back from the canvas raleigh painted through every day of her life, and look at the whole picture. when recounting her earliest memories, she told me about wishing ardently for a younger brother to race matchbox cars down the thin hard-wood hallway of her childhood home. though she ended up with a sister before her two brothers were born, she loved all of her siblings passionately. she was always their advocate, their inspiration, and their support. from playing minecraft with her brothers, to rewatching the barbie movies with her sister, to baking food for the family, she constantly showed her love for them. even when she was busy with school and work or away at college, she always made time for her family. this facet of her life prompted her father to observe that she valued relationships and people above all else (week 5). no matter who you were, she would always be there to listen, to make you laugh, and to support you. she always gave second chances, even when it might not have been the healthiest for herself, because she desperately wanted to see the best in people. no matter who she was with, she strove to make sure they felt included and wanted, even if their opinions or background differed from hers (week 7). she knew what it felt like to be discluded and overlooked, so she made it her mission to ensure that others did not have to feel that way. in addition to striving to achieve this goal in her day-to-day interactions, she used her education to learn about social, political, and economic issues and what she could to remedy them. in this respect, she was similar to father hesburgh, the late president of her beloved university of notre dame, who also strove to promote equality and peace (week 2). lifting others up always brought her joy, and the world would have benefitted tremendously from her efforts and spirit for many more years, no matter what career she would have chosen (week 4). though she undoubtedly brought joy, laughter, and comfort to many people, she was ultimately an individual. even when she was quiet, her brain was always moving. she was constantly asking “what” and “why” questions to help her understand herself and others better (week 6). she was constantly learning more about herself so she could improve as an individual, a friend, a daughter, a student, and as a sibling. she found happiness in the small things: the crunch of fallen autumn leaves, the architecture of the buildings she passed, the inside jokes with herself, the creation of a new playlist, the unfurling of a new leaf on her monstera plant, the warmth of a fresh latte, and the endless ether filled with stars. she loved learning, reading poetry, and writing. she was always jumping at the chance to hike, travel, and experience new places. she cared about sustainability and social justice. raleigh was incredibly sarcastic and loved to laugh. she was genuinely obsessed with smoothie bowls and drinking water out of dainty teacups or champagne glasses because it is more fun that way. she used her creativity to not only make art but also to craft delicious drinks for others (both at work and in her dorm-room mini coffee shop). both her bedroom at home and her dorm room at college were bursting with life from all of the plants she collected. her notebooks were filled with not only notes but also endless doodles. her camera roll was populated with not only goofy pictures with friends but also of small things she thought were funny or beautiful. her memory was filled with laughter, loneliness, joy, pain, and endless sarcastic comebacks she came up with in the shower (usually days or even months after an argument had taken place). some of her most cherished memories were eating brunch with her dad at wolfgangs (where she would challenge herself to eat the full plate of waffles), going to football games with her friends at notre dame, hiding notes around the starbucks kiosk with her coworkers, and exploring the ruins of a cathedral in london with her family. raleigh was incredibly driven in everything she set her mind to, setting high expectations for herself to excel in school, sports, and work. she was able to attend the university of her dreams, play competitive volleyball, get promotions at work, win competitions, volunteer, and go on mission trips. she had plans to travel the world, to live abroad, to marry, and someday to have a family of her own. she wanted to donate money to hundreds of charities, volunteer her time, research, and inspire others to do the same. we often think of death as darkness. as something that only brings pain. however, raleigh would have told us to listen to sister theresa aletheia noble’s words: “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (week 3). above all, raleigh was a woman full of faith in god. she trusted in his plan and accepted that if god was calling her home, it was time to go. though individually, she could have achieved so much more in this world, perhaps she achieved more through touching all of our lives. we will always miss her smile, spirit, and wise words, but we can carry on her legacy by constantly striving to improve the world around us. it’s what she would want us to do. integration #3 crossroads lisa was many things so putting her in a box is impossible. the kind of spirit she held, in a small body, was too much to even describe. she had many stories to tell for her life was a sort of book that compiled anecdotes of both her life and others. i know this is supposed to be a eulogy, in other words i should speak of her whole life, but i think a picture can say a thousand words; and as her dear friend of four years, i wish to share a perspective from her freshman spring yearwhich still stands as one of the years she spent at crossroads in life. a year that technically affected her whole life and perception of it. the spring semester was completely the opposite of her previous fall semester. to start off, she had switched her major. not even to a major within the same college that she came in, but to a whole different major in a whole nother college, and that was at first, a scare. why some may ask. well, due to many things. to start off with, she was overly stressed during her fall semester, as a freshman, which i told her off the bat that it was a no-no. at that point in time, she didn't realize that the stress was supposed to be delayed for sophomore and junior yearshe didn't get that luxury, because along with juggling a new point in my life, she had to juggle new subjects as well. bio, calc, and chem all in one. as a mendoza kid, i couldn’t relate. but as someone who hates mathnot because i’m mad at itbut more so because it's awful, i understood why lisa dreaded calc. but the ignorance of the first summer before college got to her. she did a few calc ``practices” over the summer and thought she was okay! spoiler alert, she was not. never took calc in high school, nor anything relating to calc but was thrown into a classroom filled with people who were either really big experts or in the same boat as her -expect they at least took pre-calc and therefore had a bigger paddle to go further than she did. office hours were fine, but when she also had to study for chem, and bio, classes that also incorporated some math elements at points, she was stuck. i remember most days she would look dry, tired, and sad. that was not how i wanted to see her be. she was certain that she wanted to be a doctor but was she willing to put her happiness on the line, especially for a path that did not highlight her true abilities and talents? lisa had begun asking these questions as winter break drew nearer; she was at a crossroad. “it's the rest in a piece of music that gives it renaissance and shape”. (“why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com)” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). we usually are caught up in the music to get a real feel of its message, beats, or even technicality. it is not until the ‘rest’ parts in a musical piece or the instrumentals in a song come that we can fully appreciate, comprehend, and connect with the music we have heard. in connection to one’s life, it is only by stepping further back and standing still that we can begin to see what our life really means, and what it holds. or in some cases, it doesn't. stopping, and standing still to observe the world around us can either enlighten us to stay or break away from what we know. but regardless of what it does, looking is beneficial. at that moment a part of her, the part that was still unwilling to let go of what she knew, told herself what she was doing, that her leaving was crazy. “your sister is doing it, she's pushing through” “your brother is going to do it too, in fact, he’s taking classes right now in high school to prepare”, “your parents will be disappointed” “your friends will be disappointed, you’re a quitter”. thoughts such as these swam endlessly like fishes through her heador at least these were the thoughts she was willing to communicate with me. she wanted to leave but couldn't at https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the same time. she was the first in my family to walk along a path that did not involve medicine, and i could only imagine how scary that was to stray from a familiar path into an unknown one. but lisa was a courageous soul. like father hesburgh who “ did a lot of things that people would have thought as not particularly priestly”. (“hesburgh film (panopto.com)'' produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week two). she realized that at times one needs to push the barrier of whatever you're in, to make a change. in his time, what father hesburgh was doing was considered crazy and extremely out of the ordinary; but knowing what he wanted for the future of notre dame, father hesburgh was willing to be labeled behind these names as long as his actions could speak louder and more than those of everybody else’s words. this is something she strove to be on her new path as a poli sci and english major. she hoped that in this spring semester she could shut down and prove those opposing thoughts wrong. “this semester was going to be great, wayyyyy better than the last one!” she declared after shocking me with that information. remembering death [repeatedly] was a hard concept to get behind especially because it seems simply pessimistic in ideology. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die the new york times (nytimes.com)” by ruth graham, ny timesmoreau fye week three) but doing the activity of remembering death for a week, especially during the major switch, incited several other questions that lisa always heard yet never confronted. from what brings her joy to what she wanted to do, these questions continued to jump around in her mind once again. one thing thought that lisa discovered about herself through the week 3 reading was her tendency to overlap the meaning of happiness with joy. weirdly this made her come to a https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html comforting conclusion that the path she would possibly switch to also would contribute to society as much as her previous intended path would. she liked writing and she was pretty good at it, but i also knew that she wanted a job that could lead her to the life of luxury she desired. when seeking another major for the spring semester outside of biology, she put an unnatural emphasis on her life and what the major could do for her. i witnessed her unknowingly falling back into that damaging mentality that she came into the fall semester with. she eventually decided to step out of that box and explore instead, with classes that she would enjoy such as creative writing and english. “so far, so good” she would say. “minus the workload”. listening to our lesson for (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame)” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four), the speaker’s advice to“ relax and put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major. it’s much more complex than that...but also much more exciting” and to “study what you enjoy and get involved” really stuck to her. overall, the spring semester of freshman year brought about greater insight ( an intuitive understanding of ourselves ) for lisa to enjoy stronger relationships, and have a clearer sense of purpose. she was much happier during the spring semester in spite of the workload and copious readings because she learnt to accept these things as a path she was meant to walk on. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) | (ted.com)” by tasha eurich, ted conferencesmoreau fye week six). in a way, she grew mentally, spiritually, and significantly in her comfortability of who she was. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ this spring semester also brought about acknowledgments. one hard thing lisa had to hear was to branch out because although she talked to a lot of people, she didn’t surround herself with enough diversity (“discernment conversation activity''moreau fye week five); “...because life flows through our relations with others…” she made the spring semester a semester to branch out even more, with clubs and events. (“his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferencesmoreau fye week seven). “i want to interact and get involved with diverse groups of people” she would often tell me before dashing off to another event. heck! she even made me want to join her. so, lisa’s spring semester although still posed as a new age in which she still had to maneuver through and find her groove made her spectacular . what she wanted to do with her life became somewhat complicated when she switched majors, but still having a clear picture of what she wanted her life to look like in the future made her go out and get it. she died a successful lawyer, business woman, family woman, rich, and most importantly happy. looking at lisa’s story, i still question here and there whether i am on the right track, but then remember to just go with the flow because we never know what the future holds. she was inspiring, is inspiring, and will forever be inspiring regardless of whether she is here physically or spiritually! https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration four a future with a mission a future with a mission as my freshman year here at notre dame draws to a close, i want to take the time here to reevaluate what my mission is and how i will drive forward my mission in the next three years at the university and beyond. my time here at the university has challenged me to rethink and reflect on who i am as a person. previously, i have been focused on college decisions, with scarcely any thought on my personal being. i didn’t really understand who i am, what i wanted, and what i value. this caused me to become overwhelmed as i came to campus fall semester because there were so many classes and programs that i felt pressured to explore. like pyoter said, “the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them” (“why we need to slow down our lives'” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i began to ask the question: why? why is it that i still haven’t figured out what i want to do in life? why are all my friends so set on their career goals when i’m still trying to figure out who i am? however, like tasha says, “at times, asking what instead of why can force us to name our emotions” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). now, whenever i am challenged to feel overwhelmed with the future, i think of what i want to explore and how that aligns with interests in different future careers. similarly, in my journey of self reflection i also ponder the question, “what brings me joy?” (“”three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). and i think as this year went along, the asnwer to that question has started to become clearer. specifically, in my conversation with my parents, i found that “truth and liberty are ideas that give me joy.” (conversation moreau fye week 5). moving forward, i hope to translate that into values that i can cultivate in my future career, whether that be working with non profit human rights organizations over this summer, or conducting labor economic research as an upperclassman. with such a variety of careers available for me, i am confident i can find a path while also holding on to the values that bring me joy. beyond challenging me to reflect on questions about the self, notre dame has also helped cultivate in me the value of inclusivity. specifically, i got the impression that although many diverse and divisive ideas and opinions exist on this campus, “we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” (“teaching accompainment: a learning journey together” by prof steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). that future, grounded in the traditions and values of the catholic faith, challenges all people on campus to genuinely care and love one another, as well as work together to address some of the most pressing issues in our world. throughout my time here, i have seen this play out in action. i saw that “instead of hating the other side… they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction?” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). i saw that my friends who have diverse political opinions learned to not shout over one another, but instead show each other different perspectives. through that, i felt i gained a better sense of understanding and passion for inclusivity than i had before, because anybody can show and teach https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884/download?download_frd=1 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ me something that i have never thought of before. oftentimes, that comes up most often when we discuss our racial backgrounds. like d’angelo said, “white people can represent all of humanity, people of color can only represent their racial selves.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week 10). that comes out when people assume i like a certain type of person, music, or hobby because of my race. however, by welcoming people’s opinions, even if they are different from mine, i want to form more meaningful relationships that connect me and others on a personal level beyond the imaginings of race and background. just like what dean cole said, “we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.’” by dean cole moreau fye week 12). as i move forward in my time here at nd, i will look to ted hesburgh, a “bridge builder and pontifex,” as inspiration for change (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). as one of the major figures of the university, his vision for inclusivity expanded the college from an all male, white college to the one that we see today. i hope i can carry out that vision by reaching out to others on campus, even though they are different from me. lastly, my time here at notre dame has challenged me to become more open minded. i remember coming to nd in the fall with a lot of biases and stereotypes. however, by taking different classes like theology and philosophy, and learning from others their opinions and thoughts, i felt like those walls filled with biases are being torn down. like what father boyle said, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention.” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau week fye 7). notice that closing the eyes of judgement is the first step towards cultivating mutual understanding. in my integration 3 assignment, i talked about how i wanted to be remembered upon my death as a man who counciled others, who understood others (integration 3week 8). and right now, i feel more compelled to do so than ever. with that closing of the judgement, i feel that i can explore more opportunities for growth. “the only way to know about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). for the summer, i purposefully learned to let go of my judgement and biases towards certain jobs. i learned to be more open minded about the career process, and because of that i feel now i have even more opportunities than i would have ever thought of before! https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149229 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/523775/download?download_frd=1 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1plxquvbde3ryhaslef3f-nzstdqn80uofp30yez1ne4/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ moreau integration march 4th, 2022 moreau integration forever gone but never forgotten lived what some might say a life very well lived. i am glad to have known her as a close friend and will miss her presence every day. she always reminded me to live in the moment and to make meaningful connections with every friend and everyone you meet. during her time in college at notre dame, courtney realized that she needed to start taking technology breaks and speaking more face to face with others. she started to try to do this after reading an article called, “why we need to slow down our lives.” the article said, “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives” (“we we need to slow down our lives”, pico iyermoreau week 1). courtney implemented these technology breaks by always preferring to meet with coworkers for coffee or lunch instead of a phone call or email exchange. she also would treat her friends and family to dinners often to catch up. that was always one of our traditions. once every three months we would meet up to have a girls day and grab dinner as we did not live in the same city. courtney liked to look up to many inspirational figures for ways of how she could change her life to make it more fulfilling. she was always in awe of how impactful father ted was and she specifically admired his quote, ““we don’t prove something by burning it down, we prove it by building it up” (“hesburgh”, father ted hesburghmoreau week 2). courtney lived out this quote in her life by only using constructive criticism and used https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144736 mostly encouragement when leading her teams and coaching her daughter’s swim team. courtney was very much a business and family woman, but she was always the same person whether she was at work or at home. this is the person who wanted to live a life as good and impactful as father ted’s. courtney was always a joyous person and wanted to help put a smile on everyone’s face. at notre dame she made sure to try her best to learn everyone’s name and say hi to them in the hallway. she would also try to have at least quick conversations with her fellow peers which could have been just as simple as how are you doing? another person courtney looked up to was her older brother kyle. kyle has muscular dystrophy and has been in a wheelchair since he was around three years old. he however has never let that stop him as he has graduated from purdue with an agriculture business degree and started his own agriculture drone spraying business. courtney wanted to live like kyle and know that if she put her mind to it hard enough that she would be able to do anything. this is also something that aria swarr said that something he does to stay grounded and thankful is to take an unenjoyable task and dedicate that time to god (“5 minutes” aria swarrmoreau week 6). courtney implemented this in her own life to remind her to count all of her blessings always. courtney understood the difference between happiness and joy and she wanted to find joy in everything she did. this joy she carried around in her was contagious and affected everyone near her. she always said she never worked a day in her life and that her homework in school was never awful because it was always something she enjoyed doing. a quote from an article called “three key questions” really nicely summarizes courtney’s beliefs on happiness and joy. the quote goes a little something like this, https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144753 ““happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” fr. michael himesmoreau week 3). courtney’s legacy will live on now that she is gone. she would want everyone to do what they love and share their talents with the world because it took her way too long throughout high school to finally appreciate her talents of leadership in college. in her younger years courtney was involved in every activity she could be in. in elementary and middle school she swam for two different teams, played soccer and volleyball and went to basketball camps. she was also an active member of 4-h and girls scouts. in high school courtney was a two sport varsity athlete in swimming and soccer as well as the president of class officers, nhs and student council. she also volunteered her time with the lifeteen youth group and was still an active 4-h member. at the beginning of her college career though something changed in courtney she started to see the value in the quality of her activities and not just necessarily the quantity of the activities she was in. like the ccd website recommends she was very conscious to ensure she was not overextending herself and was prioritizing sleep too, (“navigating your career journey” ccdmoreau week 4). this is why she started to center her time around studying for her major in business analytics and economics, participating in one or two clubs and also serving to help her dorm community as their president. anyone close to courtney would describe her as always willing to help out anyone in need, her hardwork and dedication, and her curiosity to always learn more (conversation with my mom, february 6th 2022moreau week 5). courtney in all times https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144741 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ of her life was dedicated to volunteering through the catholic heart work camps while she was in high school to the three missions she assisted on in haiti in her older years. courntey’s hard work, dedication, and curiosity could be seen in her work as the ceo of her own company and how she cared wholeheartedly for her family. the loss of this kind soul will leave a hole in all of our hearts until we meet her again in heaven. courtney and her life well lived has left a large impact on her family, friends, community and anyone who had the pleasure to know her. she lived her life to the fullest and connected with so many people. she lived a life that was so interconnected with everyone’s through friendships, activities, and work. i would like to end this eulogy with a quote. ““quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francismoreau week 7). courtney will be forever missed. rest in peace. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144759 lauckkaylemoreaucapstone kelly harrington moreau fye 19 april 2022 pursuing a life well-lived through love my first year of college challenged me in unexpected ways. i imagined it to be busy, difficult, and fun. the year has been all of those things, but experiencing it is entirely different than imagining it. i am in the process of learning to juggle the balance between my social and school life. in pursuing a life well-lived, i know i must find that balance. the pressure of balancing all of it correctly is stressful. this semester, i especially appreciated the insight from week 1: “yet, it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in stressful weeks, i have learned that it is sometimes best to take a step back and breathe. those stressful weeks are made worthwhile when i reflect on the importance of the activities and schoolwork that flood my calendar. those busy times are the result of my pursuing activities that bring me joy, just as we learned is so important during week 3: “... no one but you can say this is my joy. you must discover this for yourself!” (“three key questions” by fr. michale himes moreau fye week 3). pursuing a life well-lived is challenging, but assuming an attitude of patience and reflection can help us all pursue a life filled with joy and love. i have tried to make my activities on campus tell a cohesive story. some of my activities may seem somewhat out of character, but i know that anything i devote my time toward helps me achieve my goals. i want to get involved in politics in south dakota, my home state, and advocate for healthy environmental practices in agriculture. i loved the message i received through our watching of the “hesburgh” film: “serve our country. put your country before party and before politics. always do the right thing” (“hesburgh” moreau fye week 2). the advice to “always do the right thing” is simple, but it can be difficult at times. to be able to feel confident in doing the right thing, i know that i must know myself well, and “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). i have done my best so far in college to experience as much as possible to allow myself to grow. in my idea of a life well-lived, i want to be able to love those around me and receive love in return. i work to form deep relationships with my friends, family, and partner. choosing to be vulnerable with someone can feel scary, but the rewards you share with the right person are wonderful. when i asked [my boyfriend] when he thought i was my best self, he brought me back to the few most stressful months of my life. he remarked on how stressed i was with responsibilities and big choices, but he told me how much he marveled at the grace with which i handled it all. looking back at that time floods me with anxiety even now, but he saw me at my best when i questioned my decisions (discernment conversation moreau fye week 5). this reflection proved very valuable in our eulogy activity only a few weeks later. i learned that if i died, i would want to be remembered for my love and kindness, not scholarly or worldly achievements (eulogy activity moreau fye week 8). in college, it is easy to put off living a good life until sometime in the distant future. we are here to prepare ourselves for the next step in our journey. but, we are already living, and nothing is stopping up from living our good life right where we stand: “i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or on what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). one important thing we can do on campus to live out our good lives is to be inclusive. the university sees this as an important goal: “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame flows from our character as a community of scholarship, teaching, learning, and service founded upon jesus christ” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week 10). to be inclusive, we must also be mindful of our biases and our circle of information. dr. paul blasko provides great insight to this point, saying, “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blasko moreau fye week 11). our beliefs, and actions, should be dictated by careful reflection and attention to detail. to live a good life and love others, we must be inclusive. to be inclusive, we must be mindful of our shortcomings and work to overcome them. being inclusive means opening the door to an opportunity of working with more people and therefore serving more people. steve reifenberg conducts interesting research on the power of language, especially the word “accompaniment” and how its meaning changes from spanish to english (“teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). his insights show how important it is to work to understand one another in our efforts to serve each other. understanding our differences helps us bridge the gap and love one another better. pope francis says it best, “in order to do good, we need memory; we need courage; and we need creativity” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). we are each blessed with the opportunity to do good where we are: “each of us must do what we can, wherever we are” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). these calls for action are calls for more love in the world. when asked to form a mission statement for my life, i was unsure of where to begin. but, in reflecting on a year of new experiences and interactions, i knew i had one central thing driving me through the year: love. my love for farmers in my community drove my passion for a more sustainable agricultural industry. my love for my friends drove me to support them through their first year of college. my love for my family has kept me rooted in a year of all new things. this is how i decided on the driving portion of my mission statement: “my mission is to love, for it has been through love i have grown into the person i am today, and it will be through love that i can continue to grow and positively impact those around me” (mission statement moreau fye week 13). moreau integration one navigating the complexities of college life and beyond i believe that i forge life-giving relationships by allowing myself to be emotionally available and vulnerable. at notre dame, i feel like i have emotionally grown; while it is difficult to meet and make new connections with people, it has afforded me the opportunity to be emotionally open. after performing poorly on an exam, i initially hesitated to confide my feelings to one of my dorm mates. as i struggled to handle feelings of stress and failure, i deemed it best to reach out to my floor ra; in my moment of vulnerability, i was able to connect and build a better relationship with my floor ra. i think the biggest, yet most rewarding challenge is allowing ourselves to be vulnerable; in order to form a deeper connection with ourselves and the people around us, we must allow ourselves to be vulnerable. according to bréne brown, people who “fully embrace vulnerability” experience greater feelings of self-love. (“the power of vulnerability” by bréne brown moreau fye week i). when we fully recognize our self-worth, we enable ourselves to create deep, supportive relationships. too many times, people find themselves in the midst of a toxic relationship; in the article “5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship”, provides students with information on how to identify a toxic relationship and how to deal with these toxic relationships (“5 signs you’re in a toxic relationship” by olivia t. taylor moreau fye week iv). so far the best aspect of notre dame is the people i have met and connected with; while i am wary of forming toxic relationships, i still allow myself to be vulnerable with those around me. part of the college experience, and, on a greater scale, the human experience is connecting with people who will support you and build an atmosphere where mutual growth can happen. i hope that in not only my future at notre dame but wherever life takes me i allow myself to emotionally connect with people around me, and develop relationships where not only i can grow, but the other party can, too. i believe that i pursue truth by listening and understanding other people’s stories and perspectives. from my short time at notre dame, i have already experienced the diversity the university is able to offer; i have connected with people from different cultures and learned about the traditions and customs which shape the individual and their story. in a specific instance, i connected with a peer from india, and he offered a personal as well as a different perspective of india. while i initially did not know much about indian culture, i was able to gain a better understanding by simply listening to my peer’s story. actively seeking different perspectives enables an environment to grow; according to chimamanda adichi, if we reject the single story, we “realize that there is never a single story” (“the danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie, ted moreau fye week vii). while we should take the time to explore other people’s stories, it’s important to also explore our own stories. participating in an activity similar to the “where i’m from” poem, allows us to explore ourselves which is just as important as exploring other perspectives; when we can understand ourselves, we can understand other people (“where i’m from” by george ella lyon moreau fye week vi). notre dame has provided me the opportunity to go beyond not only my single story, but the single story of others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=icvmsmzlf7o https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/relationships/signs-of-toxic-friendships/ https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story http://www.georgeellalyon.com/where.html maintaining a singular perspective of the world only offers a microscopic way of thinking; when we limit ourselves to a singular story, we limit our capacity to understand others. in the future, i hope i can maintain an open mindset, where i am free to explore not only my stories but the stories of other people; i hope that by engaging in other stories i can formulate a better understanding of myself and a better understanding of the world. i believe that i grow by learning from my failures and building off my successes. in the early weeks of the semester, i experienced my first dose of failure; one of the worst aspects of failing is how unexpected it can be. going into my first college exam, i felt confident that i would perform well, considering that it was a math exam and that i am a math major. i will say it is a very humbling experience to not only fail, but to fail at what you love to do. in carla harris’ laetare medalist address, she says that “failure always brings you a gift and that gift is called experience” ("2021 laetare medalist address" by carla harris moreau fye week v). from my experience of failure, i can undoubtedly say that this is true. from my failure i learned multiple things, i learned the ways i handle and respond to failure as well as learned that failures provide opportunity. one important thing to learn from failure is to know and understand why you failed; when we understand our mistakes it makes a path to success just a little bit easier. failing allowed me to improve my study habits; it taught me that my response to failure makes me who i am. failure did provide me experience, and when that second math exam rolled around i was ready for it and conquered it to the best of my abilities. in the future, i hope that i can maintain a positive outlook on failure; i hope that when i encounter these failures i have the ability to grow from them and understand myself better. i believe that i am made to serve as a vessel for compassion, love and support. sometimes people focus on material success, and forget to live for the things they genuinely care about. from my time at notre dame as well as in the past, i often spent too much of my time working for material and academic success; however, at notre dame, i found that to truly live and to truly be happy comes from the people we love and the things we love to do. i find purpose in emotionally supporting a friend who misses home or helping my roommate simply organize her side of the room. david brooks talks about how we often ignore our side to live for others (“david brooks: should you live for your résumé ... or your eulogy?” by david brooks moreau fye week ii). when we live for others, we live compassionate and loving lives. david fagerberg writes that bringing light into a world of darkness requires hope, love and faith (“faith brings light to a dark world” by david fagerberg moreau fye week iii). i think heeding the advice of both fagerberg and brooks has allowed me to search for a more meaningful and humanitarian purpose in life. i hope that in my future at notre dame i am able to be a person people can go to for support; i hope that i can lead a life where i not only live for myself but live for others. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujswjn-syb4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/belief/faith-brings-light-to-dark-world/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau capstone integration moreau fye 4/29/2022 prof. andrew whittington my mission: growth at notre dame and life in life, i see the ultimate goal as reaching heaven. if that is not foremost in my mind and actions, i am doing something wrong. therefore, it is important to consider my relationship with god in all things, and ask myself whether they are bringing me closer to god. as a student, i seek to pursue wisdom. i wish to be able to more clearly identify god, and know better how to seek him through my actions. i wish to seek what is good, true and beautiful. these things i believe are all identifiable with god. therefore, by seeking them in my life as a student, i am seeking god. i believe that it is better to learn truth and seek your creator than to pursue worldly ends in studies, and i try to uphold this. i also seek to apply this to everyday life. i want my relationships and interactions with those around me to bring both myself and those i engage with closer to god. by helping others, and allowing them to help me, we can seek god together, rather than alone. this means being willing to be unselfish and caring towards others, recognizing and supporting them through suffering, and being willing to accept their support. i wrote this mission statement a few weeks ago, and nothing has changed in how i view these words since then. i stand by everything i said then. the point of a mission statement is to put down values that are key to who you are and how you live your life. if i am not sure about them, i cannot be sure of anything. they are my anchor, the core principles that i hold by. everything i put down in the writing of that orchestrating work that should help me define how i live my life is something i have always believed, believe firmly now, and certainly without a doubt will always believe, i have learned how to use these values at notre dame by what i have learned in the weekly moreau experiences and readings. the learning of moreau has helped me to grow and envision my role at notre dame for the next three years. in week one, i learned about distilling information. the reading said: “the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them.” (week 1). i hope to learn to use this information to figure out even more what is important to me and what is not. in week two, i learned about self knowledge, and i learned that “we are often not taught to recognise the sin in ourselves” (week 2). i hope to be able to see when i fall into sin, and stray from my values, so that i can steer myself back. the next week i learned about complications in life. there, the author talked about how “ experience has taught me a few things about tying knots.” (week 3) life is full of complicated situations, and i hope to use my values to resolve or at least come to terms with them. in another week, the author mentioned, concerning the french revolution, that “reason alone was to be the new religion.” (week 5) i believe that it is important to keep god first and foremost in my values and my life, and not reduce my values to a subjective standard. in week six one of the authors pursued even more the idea of humility, saying: “the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” 6 i want to know myself, my strengths and weaknesses, rather than simply being self centered. i want to know myself, not obsess over what i mistakenly think is me. for this will lead to obsession with others, as the next week describes, the author claiming: “we are the guys who hate those guys” is the self defining assertion of every gang.” (week 7) when you do not know yourself, you define yourself by things outside you, and this causes tribalism. i hope to avoid this, and be able to flow across ideological borders. this means, again taking a humble attitude, as the mission worker in chile did. he states “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me.” (week 9) he needed to really see them as humans to live with them well, and humble himself. i, too, seek to do this. i also seek to be able to move past misunderstandings and life as simply as possible, relying on my values to guide me. this is one challenge notre dame’s philosophy poses to me. one notre dame affiliate writes “most whites have a very limited understanding of racism because we have not been trained to think in complex ways about it and because it benefits white dominance not to do so.” (week 10) i am against labeling people as unable to think about things. i believe this leads to elitism and even more tribalism. i believe that if we simplify life and worry about good core principles we can live life best. this openness and simplicity of thought leads to the week 11 topic, where the author gives the definition, “echo chamber: a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited.” (week 11) this is why i take the classes i take. i try to take classes where i will encounter diverse intellectual thought, with many different inputs, where a truly lively discussion and learning experience can take place. i seek to gain divine wisdom and grow in relationship with god at notre dame and for the rest of my life. i hope to do this by growing in humility and self knowledge, and knowledge of god and those around me. i hope to have a good impact on the world and ultimately reach god in heaven. moreau capstone integration assignment spring 2022 santoso 1 dr. lassen moreau fye section 17 27 april, 2022 pursuing a life well-lived my mission is to give, as giving fosters personal growth. i give through my words, actions, and personal relationships. through my future career, i hope to improve the lives of others. in my personal relationships, i hope to give wisdom, strength, joy, and love. i seek to learn, as i am a lifelong learner. i hope to make the most of my education and utilize my knowledge to improve society. through my interactions with people of different experiences, backgrounds, cultures, and perspectives, i strive to become open-minded. i seek to learn from those around me, never settling for the knowledge i already have. in the article titled, “navigating your career journey,” it states that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course moreau week four). therefore, i hope to open myself up to many different experiences that are available at this university and beyond. i hope to develop a sense of openness to foreign experiences. i seek to challenge myself to go beyond my comfort zone. i seek discomfort because this fosters personal growth. in the article titled, “how to avoid an echo chamber,” dr. blaschko states, “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense of how people might reasonably disagree with us” (how to avoid an echo chamber dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i seek to grow in wisdom by surrounding myself with those who share different perspectives, rather than clinging to those with the same perspectives. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s santoso 2 i seek courage to confront my mistakes and the injustices that are present in our society. i hope to develop the courage to acknowledge wrongdoings or injustices even when nobody else has the courage to do so. the article “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” captures the importance of recognizing injustices and having the courage to take action against them. “there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them. we must be aware and also understanding by reason of fellowship with the impoverished and by reason of patient learning. for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (constitutions of the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). ignorance of racial injustice by members of society has led to little to no progress on racial injustice. as a woman of color, it is difficult to fully acknowledge the prevalence of racial injustice in america, because acknowledging this means to acknowledge that i am part of this system. i strive to acquire the courage to recognize social injustices for progress to be made. i strive to empower others to fight for what they believe in. throughout the documentary “hesburgh,” father theodore hesburgh, i was inspired by his ceaseless ability to stand up for what is right (jerry baca and christine o’malley “hesburgh” moreau fye week two). father hesburgh refused to stop the publishing of the book that promoted religious liberty. instead of complying with these demands set forth by the cardinal, father hesburgh stood up for his beliefs, and for what was right. he was against censorship, placing education before the catholic church. his actions manifested great courage and integrity. later in his life, his conscience continued to dictate his actions, even when given another choice for political gain. father hesburgh has inspired me to make decisions with the highest integrity and never fail to do what is right. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ santoso 3 i seek to live out my faith, to see the work of god present in the people, experiences, and challenges i encounter. i strive to be humble and accept that my life is in the hands of someone greater than myself. i strive to love those around me. i strive to grow sensitive to the challenges that are faced by others. my faith reminds me of these things through self-reflection and prayer. in the article, “why we need to slow down in our lives,” the author pico iyer states that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (iyer why we need to slow down in our lives moreau fye week one). this emphasizes the importance of setting time aside for reflection. i self-reflect through prayer, as this gives me direction in life and provides answers to questions i struggled with. through my faith, i will find strength and hope when faced with challenges. i was inspired by the story of dr. jihoon kim because of his strong faith and hope that he manifested when he faced paralysis (5 minutes aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). dr. kim recognized that his situation could have been worse, and in that regard, he was grateful. i strive to be defined by my responses to the challenges encountered, not the obstacles themselves. i strive to be resilient, and focus on what i can control. i seek to empathize with those around me. our world would be more peaceful and just if decisions were made for the common good, rather than self-interest. as pope francis states, “the more your actions will have an impact on people, the more responsible you are to act humbly” (why the only future worth building includes everyone his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). as a change-maker, i hope to engage with the people i serve, because they can only understand their needs once i struggle with them. the first step in making a difference is taking the initiative to engage with a community to understand their needs and find ways to address those. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript santoso 4 i strive to prioritize my happiness, as i cannot bring others happiness until i am happy myself. in the discernment conversation activity, i was told that i always placed others before myself (moreau fye week five). after reflecting upon this statement, i realized that caring for others is important but never more important than caring for oneself. my self-love is generated through my faith, because i am reminded that god loves me the way i am. in the article titled, “growing up gay and catholic,” jacob walsh states, “until i could be honest with myself, i could not let myself be loved as i was” (growing up gay and catholic jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). in this article, walsh describes his struggles to accept his sexuality because he feared that god and those around him would not love him because of it. i think the point that walsh makes here is that god’s love reaches us in ways that can be difficult to recognize. initially, walsh thought his sexuality prevented god from loving him, but he came to realize that god showed his love to him through his sexuality. it takes a great deal of humility and self-love to recognize god’s love. i seek to love myself before i can offer love to others. for me, success is the personal satisfaction and joy obtained after doing good. i seek to be driven by making a positive impact. i strive to do good things everyday, even if these are only small actions or kind words. i hope to live with a sense of urgency, passion, and purpose. in the article titled, “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die, sister alethia states, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (sister alethia "meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" moreau fye week three). i strive to recognize that i have limited time to make a difference, which will motivate me to make the most of my life. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html mangino integration iii fys 10102 4 march 2022 integration three a letter to my fifteen-year-old-self. dear emma, i hope this finds you well. i don't know how to tell you this, but….i'm you, from the future. okay, you're probably freaking out now. please don't worry, i'm not going to tell you anything about what my life is like now. i won't spoil it for you. i was just compelled to write to you because i know everything probably seems dark right now, i want to remind you what's important in this life. you've probably just come to the conclusion that high school is meaningless. you're stuck in something that seems like it has no purpose. i get that. even when it ends, you might find yourself aimlessly floating around, wondering "what now?" you might know what's not important, but you're struggling to discern exactly what is. and i'm not going to pretend i have the answer to that. but i will say this: if you spend all of your time wrapped up in thinking about the downright awfulness of it, it's not going to help you. you ask yourself "why" constantly. it's just how we think. but it's going to drag you down even further, my dear. it took a long time, but i've learned that “if you ask why…you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality …. when i feel anything other than peace, i say ‘what’s going on?’; ‘what am i feeling?’; ‘what is the dialogue inside my head?’; ‘what’s another way to see this situation?’ or ‘what can i do to respond better?’” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). you can't passively wait for your life to improve. change requires big decisions, ones you might not be ready to make yet, but that's okay. you'll grow into an adult and you'll have to learn to stand on your own two feet. and it will be painful, but you'll make it out alive. you're at the time in your life where you've numbed yourself to everything that's going on in the world around you. it's okay, it really is…you probably had to in order to survive. i understand that. you used to feel everything too much. i can't wrap my head around issues and it makes me feel like a moron ninety percent of the time, but i have the same ideals you probably do. the wish to see a world where " solidarity, this beautiful and, at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic and scientific choices, as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples and countries." ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) it's easy to feel hopeless in a landscape where every leader seems corrupt in his own way and debates turn into wars of rage. i still want to change the world, the way you do. but soon you're going to have to come to terms with the fact that you can't fix everything right now. you can do some things, though. i know you have that all-or-nothing mentality. but if you dedicate your life to serving even a small group of people, you will make a difference. maybe it won't be on a large-scale level, but everything counts and you have to learn to accept that at some point. i know in the past few years you've been happiest at youth group, especially when you'd go out into the community and volunteer. even then, you would say that "the most gratifying things i think i've ever done have always been hands-on service activities.” (7 clues career survey, meruelo ccd moreau fye week four) i know for sure now that whatever i wind up doing with my life will be service-based to some degree. i'm letting you know of that now ahead of time: serving others is the best thing you can do. always. whether you take my advice or not…just please do something. our….your time here is limited. and that doesn't seem real right now, because something has kept you from understanding what death means. a nun once said that "remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful.” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three) some days i have to force myself to think about things in this way. and i haven't been able to halt the panic that comes with it, but those moments of clarity have driven me away from my mindless tumblr browsing and, for the briefest moments, into the world of the light. but i don't even know if that's a place you can reach now, i'll be honest. everything is a bit foggy and it might be that way for a while. i'm sorry. there isn't much i can do about it. i wish there was. i wish you didn't have to go through that alone, but the one thing i will promise you is that you won't be alone for long. i hate to say this, but before you hit puberty you were kind of a cruel kid. you made fun of people for things they couldn't change. and although i wouldn't have wished this on us, maybe you're more empathetic now because of it. you don't know how now, but in time you'll learn how to help the people you care about (and you will find people to care about in the first place). i watched a documentary recently. it hasn't come out where you are, or maybe it just has. i'm not going to tell you about it, because it might reveal a little too much about me, but i have this line for you: "in my faith, you learn there's meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith, but in the end i found strength…i wanted to help others find their own strength, even in the greatest of suffering." (hesburgh moreau fye week two) you've probably heard this a hundred times, but maybe hearing it from you (me?) makes it a little more bearable, because it's true. your heart will break for the weird kids and the outcasts. it will probably make you want to become a teacher. you'll be able to understand what's going on when your friends' worlds turn upside down. whenever there's a crisis, you'll be there. it's a part of you: "the ability to rise to the occasion in the face of pressure. if i were able to do that in every situation, i think i could be proud of that at the very least. (moreau fye week 5). i will warn you: sometime soon, your community will suffer another loss. two, actually. you'll go back to lying awake at night worrying that your best friends could be planning their own demise and you would never know. but i promise you're better at picking up on things than you give yourself credit for. you're not completely cold and soulless. you're capable of caring for other people, no matter how self-absorbed you might be. and that's the thing that sticks with me now: the people in your life are the most important part of your life. you want to do a million things, but you'll figure out what you want to be eventually, and whatever you decide you'll be okay. but it's love that you're missing, and i don't just mean romance. the love of having friends and knowing that you would both do anything for each other. you act like you don't need people right now, but that's just not true. humans are social animals, and you deserve to have people in your life who care about you. you just need to make it a priority to care about them, too. you may not know who you are right now. you feel lost. you don't know yet that there's a spark of the young girl you once were, waiting inside the depths of your soul for you to talk to her again. she's hiding in the places you used to love. "the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know." ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) go to the pond at the edge of the street where you used to sit for hours. open up your sketchbook. don't tell yourself what you should and shouldn't think, just let your soul pour itself out onto an empty page. the greatest beauty in life is in your bonds, and they will come to you with time. don't lose hope. don't become your own canvas. the world is waiting for you to leave a mark on it – waiting for you to crawl out of your head and finally understand where goodness is to be found and find that spark again and use it to make someone's life whole. to love and to be loved, and to fight for what you love. i promise it will all come with time. just try to carry these words with you. with love, emma (march 4, 2022) what makes me me week 8 lim1 jaehyun lim mr. oswald moreau 15 october 2021 what makes me me. as nearly 2 months have now come and gone since the start of my college experience, i feel unbelievably older, more exhausted, and yet also a lot more mature. this is the first time i have ever truly experienced this much freedom, and while i am still not quite used to it or particularly fond of it, i have managed to grow a lot from my experiences at notre dame. the struggles, opportunities, and relationships iâ��ve developed here have all helped me discover what things i believe in, and how important those root beliefs are to me. my first important root belief is i believe that i grow by recognizing my faults and taking responsibility for them. coming into notre dame, i maintained a sort of condescending mentality, in which i convinced myself that i would be better than everyone else and have a 4.0 gpa while making the travel team for sibc my first semester and still have time to be active in all my other 6 clubs as well. needless to say, things didnâ��t quite go as planned. while i still hope that i can get a 4.0 gpa this semester (ð���), i ultimately didnâ��t get selected for the fidelity travel team, stopped showing up to most of my teachersâ�� office hours after the first 2 weeks due to being sick and then being busy, and ultimately leaving 4 out of my 7 total clubs. in short, my original expectation to be perfect and not address potential hurdles/failures ultimately made me not only achieve less but also think less of myself. this connected to what we focused on in our lim2 discussion/reading for week 1: â��and we perfect, most dangerously, our childrenâ�¦ our job is not to say, â��look at her, she's perfect. my job is just to keep her perfect -make sure she makes the tennis team by fifth grade and yale by seventhâ��â�� (â��the power of vulnerabilityâ�� by brenã© brown moreau fye week one). when i first read this article, i didnâ��t really take into account the advice that was given because i feared that becoming satisfied with the current version of myself meant complacency, but i now know that there is a way to be both driven while embracing their own faults. in the future, i hope to not only understand this but also apply it more and more to my daily life to be a more optimistic and positive person. my second root belief is i believe that my purpose is to leave a positive legacy that impacts as many people as possible. my second official day at notre dame during welcome weekend, i attended my first lecture: finance and opportunities by robert batallio. it was there i realized how so many of my peers seemed to live only for their resumes and materialistic goods, and at that very point, i began to feel incredibly alone. all throughout the summer i obsessed over target schools, the prestige that came with it, and the post-grad salaries and opportunities, but yet now that i was here, i didnâ��t really want to be just that type of person. what struck me was how our week 2 reading voiced my exact sentiments: â��and most of us, including me, would say that the eulogy virtues are the more important of the virtues. but at least in my case, are they the ones that i think about the most? and the answer is noâ�� (â��should you live for your rã©sumã© ... or your eulogy?â�� by david brooks moreau fye week two). i didnâ��t want to become only an adam i, but i was always worried whether i could live the lavish lifestyle i dreamed of as an adam ii. i am still trying to maintain a balance to live with a great resume and a great character, and i plan to continue to live with this mentality, as wishful as it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mllwteapqim&ab_channel=ted lim3 sounds. leaving behind a great legacy requires sacrifice of some kind as well as a few resume-worthy accomplishments, but being remembered as a good person in your legacy requires having great character. i hope to pursue both. my third root belief is i believe that i pursue a connection with god for comfort and an understanding of my world. i talked with father pete following the trip to the grotto at the end of our welcome weekend, and i remember telling him all about my fears and worries of being so far apart from my family and managing myself at notre dame. i am catholic, but i wasnâ��t a full-blown catholic, and i had trouble placing my faith in god. just yesterday after finishing my mid-terms, however, i found myself at the dorm chapel at 4 a.m., thanking the lord for what he has done for me, and praying for the continued health and happiness of my family. father pete said it the best: â��jesus focused on reminding us of the life we are called to regardless of our perceived misfires, mistakes, miscalculations. a life that requires courage, a willingness to shed the comforts of this world and above all else, to love those who are most in needâ�� (â��the role of faith in our storyâ�� by fr. pete mccormick moreau fye week three). god for me is what gives me hope, and a constant motivation to not only stay alive, but to live well and help others. my fourth root belief is i believe that i forge live-giving relationships through mutual respect, love, and sacrifice for each other. the first thing that hit me at notre dame was how nice everyone was. from the students to the teachers to the cafeteria workers to the janitors, everyone was so welcoming and kind. while i did hear about how nice people at notre dame are and how willing they were to help fellow notre dame kids, i figured that was some typical fake college pr image, and not what the university was actually like. it made me realize how toxic the culture was at my high school, and how toxic i was personally. the video â��because i love youâ�� https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois lim4 managed to show ways in which people could â��loveâ�� someone and still be in a toxic relationship, and made me ashamed of myself (â��because i love you, double whiskeyâ�� by one love foundation moreau fye week four). i realized that i had hurt my parents, friends, and peers for my own personal gain, all without realizing what i had done. since realizing this, i have tried to change myself to not only be in healthy relationships, but reach out and repair my old relationships as well. my fifth root belief is i believe that i grow best by what i experience. one of the main reasons why i actually came to notre dame was because i wanted to become a better person and a better student. in high school i would frequently procrastinate on assignments and tests, and would often alienate myself from people who were long-time friends over trivial arguments, and i no longer wanted to be that type of person. similar to what father grove mentioned in â��two notre damesâ��, i needed to be full in both reason and spirit in order to become successful in whatever i wanted to achieve (â��fr. sorin letter to basil moreauâ�� by fr. sorin moreau fye week five). my experiences in my journey at notre dame, while tiring and overwhelming, have helped shape me into a better person both socially and academically. i plan to hopefully continue growing my character while iâ��m here. my sixth root belief is i believe that family and home define the inner core of who i am. at the first year retreat for asian students, i was fortunate enough to find a bunch of like-minded people who i could connect to, as we all had lived in korea before coming here, and understood the culture difference that we were adjusting to. this connects to my poem, in which i state how â��where iâ��m from, weâ��re made out of steel, rubber, aluminum, bolts; even-keeled.â��, because korean cultural norms no longer applied here, but i still seeked that same sort of https://youtu.be/mwq5ur9oz-g https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view lim5 familiarity and rigid culture in which i grew up in (â��week 6 poemâ�� by jaehyun lim moreau fye week six). i learned that my hometown is and will always be a part of who i am, but i also hope to make nd culture a part of me and my poem as well. my seventh and final root belief is i believe that i pursue truth by confirming the difference between fact and fiction. notre dame has a majority white population, and while that hasnâ��t bothered me nearly as much as i thought it would, i still have been faced with stereotypes regarding korea (e.g. north or south), and my asian heritage in general. as someone who has spent such a long time in korea, i am worried that i may do the same thing to other groups as well. i am a naturally stubborn person and what i believe to initially be the truth is often times something i fight to maintain, even if my version of the truth is completely wrong (e.g. vince carter is a top 5 nba player). my concern regarding the different versions of â��truths has only grown, and has gotten worse: â��the ability to tell complex stories about ourselves has atrophiedâ�� (â��how to destroy truthâ�� by david brooks moreau fye week seven). i agree withdavid brooks and his message on how implicit bias and emotions destroy the validity of truth. in my brief time here at nd, i have tried to pursue truth by trusting professors, students, and faculty more experienced than me for all questions that i have. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1qdj-py1iecsdtaafmhtfmtxupq9ggn9cjshxndqiz4u/edit?usp=drivesdk https://www.nytimes.com/2021/07/01/opinion/patriotism-misinformation.html?referringsource=articleshare integration 3 remembering my life well-lived a life well-lived is all chris could have ever asked for. during his life, he accomplished many great things that his family and friends can all be proud of. for all of the good things he has done throughout his life, i am sure he was able to reflect back on his life and smile, understanding how he has touched so many lives. when chris was just a child, it was very noticeable how competitive he would be growing up. one distinct memory that i have is chris arguing with the t-ball coaches that another kid was out, “this isn’t baseball, those are not the rules!” the coaches had to explain that nobody ever gets out in t-ball and that it was all about learning the game. as he grew up past that experience, chris was always capable of earning the respect from his teammates, coaches, and other parents. not only did this come from on the field, on the court, or in the pool, but it also came with how he interacted with these people. he always had a way to keep things fun, high-spirited, and enjoyable, while keeping the game or activity competitive. chris always talked about how fast his life was moving and how he missed his childhood days, “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (why we need to slow down our lives pico iyer moreau fye week 1). he definitely wished to live in the moment more and really take a step back from a lot of things in his life to really understand what he valued. as chris got older, he really began to understand how important it is to be honest with each other and tell the truth. his mom always stressed how important it is to open up and talk every now and then. she really wanted to be as close to him as possible, whether the truth would upset her or not. to her, that did not matter, she just always talked about living an honest life with each other. telling the truth will make these relationships stronger, “if i may be unkind to some person in what i say about them, it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh film moreau fye week 2). another thing that chris had was a great mindset. aside from being positive and uplifting, he always tried to find ways to improve. he was regarded as very coachable and applied the many life lessons he had learned, “[dissatisfaction] is what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!” (fr. michael himes moreau week 3). happiness is only a day-to-day thing. this should not have a major effect on our life’s choices; whereas joy, fulfilling our talents, and providing service do affect our decisions. having passion in something means that we want to get better by doing what we love the most. we should strive to find this passion, which chris always tried to do. chris had found a passion for the sport of swimming. he has had mixed emotions about it all of his life.“i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed – maybe it was something a friend or family member wanted you to do a required course in high school” (navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). in fact, the only reason he joined the swim team was that he was exhausted from watching his older brother practice. since it was too hot outside and the community pool didn’t open for a few hours, he finally hopped in the water. he had taken the sport as far as he could have ever imagined. the sport allowed chris to meet some of his best friends, whether it was at home or in college. “i thought it was a really interesting conversation because it was really the first time we talked about what we think and respect each other. some things were scary accurate, which is unbelievable considering we have only known each other for a few months” (conversation activity moreau fye week 5). this is one thing chris had really emphasized. meeting new people in a whole new environment can certainly be a difficult challenge, but when he met a group of strangers who he’d see every day, they instantly clicked. he often described it as if they had known each other for many years leading up to that moment. he believed that these relationships are what is key to living a life well-lived. that experience with that close-knit group of men had everyone reflecting on their lives and how they wanted to spend the rest of their life. coming from the university of notre dame, they all knew they had some major opportunities in front of them if they applied themselves in the right areas. with this great opportunity comes a lot of pressure and stress, “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships…” (the right way to be introspective tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). however, chris’ mindset and relationships were solid enough to enjoy even the smallest moments with the ones he loved. throughout life, relationships will have their ups and downs, and it's about how you can recover from those moments in life, “[hope] can do so much, because a tiny flicker of light that feeds on hope is enough to shatter the shield of darkness” (why the only future worth building includes everyone pope francis moreau fye week 7). chris always had a lot of hope for whatever life threw his way. chris would always love to be remembered for how joyful, hard-working, and dedicated he was. his family is what he values the most, and he certainly hopes that they remain proud of what he accomplished in this life. integration 1 moreau fye 10/15/2021 my leap of faith for me, choosing to attend the university of notre dame has been a jump over the edge or–as i like to call it– a leap of faith. taking such a leap, i could never have been sure of what would catch me over the edge, but little did i realize it would quickly sprout into something so wonderful. over the summer, i had many worries about attending college. having gone to a large, public high school, i was already pretty used to a populated school environment, yet my mind was still plagued with many anxieties. knowing that the school was much smaller and more prestigious than some of my other choices, i was worried about not fitting in academically and socially. however, within the first week i already foresaw the amazing experiences that await me at notre dame. continuing on my journey, i’d like to reflect on my beliefs and experiences to help me to maximize my appreciation for these next steps of my life. i believe that i am meant to be where i am. one of my biggest concerns about attending notre dame had been whether or not i would fit in. being from the suburbs of chicago, i personally had no affiliation with notre dame, but i knew many people who did. i was under the impression that the school had primarily legacy students. although i applied, i wasn’t entirely convinced this is a school i would’ve found friends at. however, being here now i have grown to realize that this school is the most ideal place i could have found these friends. coming into the school i began to develop a better mentality that relates to a video that we watched for our moreau course. in the video, dr. brené brown states, “there was only one variable that separated the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging and really struggle for it. and that was that the people who have a strong sense of belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week two). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 here at notre dame, i realize that i deserve to be here and i deserve the sense of community the school provides. i no longer doubt the reasons i was brought here and feel that i truly am in the right place. as it was said in a handout we read, “people in healthy relationships respect each other. they can talk honestly and freely to each other and share power and control over decisions” (“healthy vs. unhealthy relationships” by the red flag campaign moreau fye week four). i feel that i’ve already fostered friendships i can genuinely qualify as healthy. there exists lots of mutual respect and support, despite coming from very different lives and places and i look forward to seeing how those relationships blossom in the future. these friendships have helped me to see my place in this university and have given me a sense of belonging. i believe that i pursue truth through being different. one quote i particularly liked from dr. brené brown was that, “they believed what made them vulnerable made them beautiful” (“the power of vulnerability” by brené brown moreau fye week one). i feel that vulnerability can be characterized by our differences. when i choose not to act like everyone else, i am choosing to be my authentic self and that puts me vulnerable to judgement. however, i’ve learned that it’s important to embrace this vulnerability because it is essential to discovering who i truly am as a person. to find my truths, i believe that i need to stay true to my story and who i am regardless of any judgement and biases people may hold. similar to this, in a video we watched by chimamanda ngozi adichie, she discusses some of the implicit biases she faced in her lifetime. for this reason she emphasizes that, “stories matter. many stories matter. stories have been used to dispossess and to malign, but stories can also be used to empower and to humanize. stories can break the dignity of a people, but stories can also repair that broken dignity” (“danger of a single story” by chimamanda ngozi adichie moreau fye week seven). although stories can be twisted, they can also be used to empower. when others are allowed to tell our stories for us, that is when they misrepresent us; when we tell our own, we are able to https://drive.google.com/file/d/0b93cikonincls1jpuzz5q1jsegs/view?resourcekey=0-cnuzpcgzqmkhdyqajvac_a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4qm9cgrub0&list=plmipsabet-w_hjesjtzaith2s1wbm-kd0&index=4 https://www.ted.com/talks/chimamanda_ngozi_adichie_the_danger_of_a_single_story/up-next speak truths. i believe that by living my life and telling my own authentic story, i can pursue who i truly am meant to be. i believe that finding myself will help me to maximize my potential. according to fr. pete, “the greatest journey you will ever go on is one of self-discovery. on this journey, success, productivity, and failure are an afterthought. what truly matters is responding to the best of your ability as the person you know yourself to be” (“the role of faith in our story” by fr pete mccormick, c.s.c moreau fye week three). i believe that my journey of self discovery has truly begun at notre dame, where i am given more freedom than ever before. living away from my family while in control of all of my free time and habits, i am left to make my own decisions. the choices that i make have already helped me to learn a lot about myself since i’ve been at school. however, i believe that fr. pete’s words are essential to this path. i should not make decisions based on whether or not i think it will have a good or bad outcome, instead i need to choose what feels the most true to myself. by choosing what feels right for myself, my potential will be maximized because i can live out the life i truly was meant to live, rather than trying to be someone i am not. i believe that my faith will carry me toward success. as said by fr. kevin grove, “our lives are not our resumes… it’s letting faith and reason, both in their fullness, be applied to every part of life” (“two notre dames: your holy cross education'' by fr. kevin grove, c.s.c. moreau fye week five). my actions and involvement throughout my life are undoubtedly a significant part of who i am. however, my mentality and mindset compose my entire identity. by maintaining my faith and reason, i am using my best ability to do what is right and allowing god to control the rest. i will always remember that “man proposes, but god disposes” (“fr. sorin letter to bl. basil moreau, december 5, 1842” by fr. sorin moreau fye five). i am intended to act as my true self, and through faith i know that god will assure that the correct outcomes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lczmeqwwois https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=859bc1a8-0d0f-4eb4-a1c1-d0a45c429187 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view https://drive.google.com/file/d/1o56woqdq3qrrkzit8eyrvyly5cqap2vb/view come out of my life. at notre dame, i am “from a new lifestyle with new doors open... [but i am] looking forward to god, and a wonderful future ahead” (“where i’m from” by moreau fye week six). i realize that notre dame is one of the most significant successes that my faith has matched me with. by continuing this faith with god, i look forward to the wonderful new opportunities, perspectives and experiences i will continue to develop as life goes on. i firmly believe that i have found the place where i am meant to grow: the university of notre dame. in 8 quick weeks, this school has brought me kindness, faith and a sense of belonging; it inspires me to fulfill my potential and give back someday. through my faith, i am learning to define myself and am already seeing how my mentality has improved since arriving on campus. by staying kind and true to myself, while maintaining faith, i have the perfect recipe to make the most of my life and experiences. it would be impossible to express the amount of gratitude i have to be where i am now, but i look forward to my future with god and notre dame. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xvi5qzybqjxqwe4vhxliw0n73rwjuyiroltc8a1i1nm/edit integration 3 mullery 1 theo helm moreau first year experience 5 march 2022 a life of love was a beloved son, brother, and friend to all who loved nothing more than spending time with the people he cared for most. although his time here with us was cut short, he lived his life to the fullest and made every second he had count, not living in fear of death: “‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). he was a man of enormous faith, great loyalty and generosity, unfailing dependability, and high principles. he was devoted to his family and fiercely protective of those he loved. he sincerely loved life and worked tirelessly to make sure others did, too. sean would be honored to see how many people came out today to pay their last respects—a testament to his ability to connect and become close with others. sean was born on october 7th, 2002, to his two loving parents, kathleen and steve. from the very beginning, family was of huge importance in his life, with older siblings patrick and claire and younger sister bridget all playing massive roles in who he was. though they had their disagreements at times, sean loved all of them immeasurably, and anyone who knew him could see that. he might not have always shown this with his words, but his deeds spoke louder: whether it was doing bridget’s chores when she was having a bad day or staying up all night to https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html mullery 2 talk to claire when she needed him, sean was perpetually ready to put his family first over himself. one of the greatest joys of sean’s life was being able to attend notre dame. as his parents had gone there for law school, he had been raised as a lifelong fan and loved all things nd. going there was a dream come true, and he would not have wanted his time at nd to be different in any way. he was truly inspired by the school’s mission, especially as exemplified by father hesburgh: “they would talk about how he would be gone so much and he would travel around, but the reason he did that was to set the example for the faculty and for the students that the institution needed to be engaged in the world” (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). he was also deeply committed to his studies and dove fully into the career development process in order to find his true vocation: “[dr. donald super] contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). sean’s favorite part of his notre dame experience was, without a doubt, his dorm, morrissey manor. he invested himself completely in the community there and cherished the close relationships he made with his fellow manorites. another thing about sean was that he valued the smaller things in life: “after admiral richard e. byrd spent nearly five months alone in a shack in the antarctic, in temperatures that sank to 70 degrees below zero, he emerged convinced that ‘half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). he didn’t ask for anything too crazy in his life, really only caring about who the people who surrounded him https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ mullery 3 were rather than the things he had. he loved having late night conversations with those he was close with, using them as an opportunity to learn more about both others and himself: “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau fye week five). the morrissey lobby became a favorite spot of his to sit down and talk with other manorites after long days of doing work. all in all, being part of such a special community like the manor was one of the things that sean was proudest of, especially considering he was elected as vice president of the dorm shortly before his passing. one of sean’s other best qualities was that he was a deep thinker and thought seriously about important issues. at times, he struggled with getting in his own head too much, but he learned over a long time the dangers of this and avoided them: “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). when it came to considering meaningful world problems, sean cared deeply and always did his best to make real change. he was very passionate about trying to bring people together by putting aside their differences: “the challenge is getting them to abandon the territory of their gang and replace it with a turf more ample, inclusive, and as expansive as god’s own view of things” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). overall, sean was a passionate fighter for what really counts in this world, rather than being someone who only cared about trivial matters. above all, sean was a man who made a lasting mark on everyone he met. whether he knew them his entire life or had only talked to them for 5 minutes, anyone could attest to his character and genuine concern for the people around him. though we will miss him dearly, we https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817?module_item_id=167946 mullery 4 know his passing has brought all of us closer together and will inspire us to live all of our lives to the fullest. rest in peace, sean—we love you! the mission and (intended) life of mission statement (writing a personal mission statement – moreau fye week thirteen): i am called primarily to love through my life. loving means putting the interests of others before my own interests in my thoughts and actions. i must love everyone in my life, although this does not mean stooping to what they always want. if i am to truly love, then i must be willing to give them what they need to be the best version of themselves. this entails treating people with dignity, being willing to help when necessary, and sacrificing my desires when they conflict with others’ needs. i am called to use my gifts to maximize my ability to love. the three most valuable gifts i have are understanding, wealth, and intelligence. i have been blessed with understanding. i must make an honest attempt to truly understand the perspectives of those i disagree with to avoid demonizing them. in a similar light, i must pursue the truth in my life. seeking the truth allows me to live my life more fully because it will be oriented toward reality. i was born into a wealthy family, but i have not actually earned this wealth. therefore, i must use these resources to serve those who have not been so lucky. i have been blessed with intelligence, so i must use this intelligence fully as a student. capitalizing on my intelligence through the educational opportunities available to me makes me an example for others and will provide the resources and knowledge i need to serve others in deeper ways. when my interests allow me to love more fully, i must pursue them. in doing so i will serve my community. i must maintain my physical fitness both to love myself and to allow myself to love others more effectively and over a longer period of time. the ultimate act of love is to love god, who always has our best interests at heart. simply, i must love god by keeping others’ best interests at heart. living my mission statement: loving others can take an infinite number of forms, depending on each individual situation. “so, i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“five minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). this could be as simple as sacrificing my time to help a classmate understand a difficult concept. it may also mean skipping class to comfort a friend who is struggling with grief or depression. however, these examples are quite simple and do not guide the bigger picture of my life. i possess three resources that allow me to uniquely love others. i am understanding, wealthy, and intelligent. i must go out of my way to devote these special personal resources to loving others as fully as possible to go above and beyond in my life of love. my hometown in pennsylvania is very politically diverse. additionally, i spend time with many people with different religious beliefs. this has given me the opportunity to develop my gift of understanding. while most people are set in their beliefs (even if they claim otherwise in my experience), i make a genuine attempt to weigh every side of a dispute. “we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well-thought-out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd – moreau fye week eleven). this requires stepping outside of my perspective and looking at why my “opponents” see the world differently from myself. as father hesburgh said, “it was going nowhere. but i found one thing running through our conversations: that they all liked to fish” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). as i try to understand other perspectives, i will avoid demonizing others and develop unity and respect on a human level which will lead to progress. this practice stems from a desire to pursue the truth. i believe that there is objective truth in every aspect of life, but i must avoid assuming i know it. i would compare truth to a ruler shrouded in fog. while there is an objective measure of truth because the ruler is 12 inches for everyone, we all struggle to perceive this because of the fog of our perspectives. similarly, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). i must remember this to enhance my understanding because i cannot assume that i know this truth. by striving to know the truth outside of the assumption that my perspective is right i will hopefully grow closer to knowing it and thus love others by enacting it in my life. i was born into a wealthy family, although i have done nothing special to earn or deserve this. i can very easily thank god for my good fortune and live a life of luxury. after all, isn’t that what anyone else would do in my position? however, i believe that this is selfish because i have not earned this. therefore, i must use my wealth to serve those who are not wealthy. i have done this in the past by volunteering at community gardens, in inner city areas, and with refugees. the congregation of the holy cross echoes my own sentiments, stating “we stand with the poor and the afflicted because only from there can we appeal as jesus did for the conversion and the deliverance of all” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 – moreau fye week twelve). at notre dame, i do this by volunteering with mercy works at the depaul academy, a center for teenage boys who have struggled with delinquency. many would otherwise be in corrective programs, and most have not consistently attended school because of their poor home lives. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a “you” and themselves as part of an “us.” we all need each other” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart – moreau fye week seven). connecting with people who had such different upbringings allows me to recognize the person under these sometimes-intimidating façades and reach the level of connection that father greg boyle describes. in the future, i intend to continue volunteering in whatever local communities are most in need. my intelligence is my final unique resource. intelligence can easily be used for my own self-gain, and to some extent i intend to do this. however, i believe that intelligence should not be used exclusively in this capacity. i am a student at the university of notre dame because of my intelligence. right now, i must love myself by fully using this intelligence to succeed in my studies. in doing so, i will build up my capacity to love others by maximizing my resources, both money and position, after notre dame. alongside my intelligence is the belief that i should pursue my interests if it benefits my community. this belief comes directly from father michael himes’s criteria for choosing a career path. “1. is this a source of joy? 2. is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible? 3. is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” (“three key questions” adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i have two primary interests that fit these criteria: my love for foreign languages and my interest in international relations. i am currently studying russian language at notre dame (using my wealth and my intelligence, to connect to previous ideas). i will also begin pursuing a global affairs major next semester. these courses will equip me for the world of diplomacy, my current career path. language allows me to bridge cultural divides, a skill which is a source of joy, taps into my talents and gifts, and provides a genuine service to society. additionally, studying international relations through my global affairs major meets these same criteria. pursuing a diplomatic career is a great career choice because, “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). at the same time, “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). i must remain open to different careers that better fit these criteria, but for now i should continue pursuing diplomacy. i believe that physical fitness is essential to loving myself and others. this means exercising. i must be physically strong enough to manually serve when necessary, and this also promises to increase my lifespan and thus allow me to serve in the ways previously mentioned for a longer time. i do this now by running and lifting, although i need to do these things more regularly in the future. i should develop a routine in every stage of my life that accommodates exercise. in mark 12:30-31, jesus says, “love the lord your god with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ the second is this: ‘love your neighbor as yourself.’ there is no commandment greater than these.” jacob walsh elaborates on this, writing, “jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto – moreau fye week ten). i believe that the ultimate act of love is to love god through others. my catholic faith is the single most influential factor developing my mission statement. i must actively live catholicism to love god and others, my neighbors, by pursuing the truth with the gift of understanding, using my wealth to serve, taking advantage of my intelligence and my interests to serve in unique, higher ways, and maintaining physical fitness to maximize the length of time that i can love others. “the other risk is believing that things can never change for the better, an attitude nearly certain to be a self-fulfilling prophecy” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). i will live this hope as i seek to spread love in a world that needs it. when i finally die, whenever that may be, i hope that i will be as happy as i currently am, as described in my eulogy: “indeed, he lived a fulfilling life filled with service and centered around faith” (“defining a life well-lived – moreau fye week eight). fa21-fys-10102-64 professor oswald 22 april 2022 pursuing human dignity at notre dame i consider the highest good in life to be human dignity. people deserve to be valued and respected by virtue of their humanity. this means that people should be treated ethically no matter what they look like, where they are from, or how poor they might be. therefore, my life’s mission is to work to promote human dignity (personal mission statement by moreau fye week 13). i believe that a life well lived is a life where one is able to work towards their personal mission statement. this class has made me realize that i have not done all that i could possibly do in my first year to do this. the question then becomes: how can i do better in my next three years? i believe that by taking more time to reflect, continuing to build strong relationships, and pursuing my career, i can do a better job of carrying out my life’s mission. the first step to carrying out my life’s mission in the next three years at notre dame is to take more time to reflect. researchers “have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives'' (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). taking time to reflect is often far down my priority list. i’ve found myself far busier than i was at home, having to manage my classwork with clubs, hall commitments, career discernment, and making plans for summer. this has left me with little time to put all my worries aside and reflect. but, as this course has taught me, reflection is incredibly important. this stems from one of the few assurances that we have in life; the fact that we will die. it's important because it reminds us that we have limited time on this planet to make the impact that we want to (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, nyt moreau fye week 3). if we want to be as efficient as possible in living a life well lived, we must reflect to see what is working and what is not working. is a certain friend someone that we want to continue hanging out with? is this really a career that i want to pursue? without asking ourselves questions like these, we might never find the best way to follow our mission statements and live a life well lived. it is important, however, that we reflect in the correct way. reflecting can sometimes lead us to struggle in pursuing a life well lived because it makes us sad as we are keenly aware of our own weaknesses (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). if i instead ask myself what questions questions that help us instead see our potential i can make sure that this reflection is meaningful. applying this practically over my next three years at notre dame, i will continue a practice that i recently developed in my god and the good life class. whether it be writing an essay, doing math homework, or reading ggl interactive essays, i normally do so while sitting on my futon or laying in my bed. as a result, i often find myself feeling the need to do work while relaxing in bed or on the couch. in the last few weeks, i have been doing all of my work in places where all i do is complete school work (library, study room). in doing so, a distinct separation between where work is to be done and where i am able to take time for myself and reflect is created. the second step to carrying out my life’s mission in the next three years at notre dame is to work to build more numerous and improve upon the ones i already have. being raised in a catholic household, i, like father boyle, sometimes struggle to show each other love and appreciation. as father boyle put it, showing others love “was not so available to me in my own irish catholic background. you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by father greg boyle moreau fye week 7). while i do love people, my lack of practice has made it difficult to show it. given this, while i have some really strong relationships here at school, most are missing something. and what i have found is that they are missing accompaniment. accompaniment is the idea that, as humans, we are partners moving forward for a better future, not just there to help both parties learn from shared experiences (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i think by showing love for others, i can build stronger and more resilient relationships based on accompaniment. but how does this construction of relationships help me carry out my mission statement? coming from a relatively liberal school from the suburbs of philadelphia, my first year at notre dame has been a culture shock in many ways. at home, i was in a sort of filter bubble (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). most if not everyone agreed with me on political or social issues. i rarely had to debate anyone who disagreed with me. this has not been the case here at notre dame. the student population is far more conservative, and i have received pushback for some of my opinions. for instance one of my friends is a staunch trump supporter. i remember one day after our theology class, we went to go eat at lafortune and i said something about the 2020 election. he quickly began to describe how he doubted the election’s validity. this stunned me i had never actually met a person that felt that way, and seeing the certainty with which he spoke really broke me out of my filter bubble. by constructing relations of accompaniment with people like this, they will be willing to tell me that they disagree. and by building more numerous relationships, i will gain more unique perspectives that notre dame offers (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac moreau fye week 10). this ensures that if i have a fault in judgment and am not really acting in the interests of human dignity, these people will recognize it and call me out on it. by knowing that when i am wrong i will be told, i can better know how to correctly pursue my mission statement. the final step to carrying out my life’s mission in the next three years at notre dame is to discover a career in which i can work to fulfill my mission statement. earlier this year, i had no idea what i wanted to do with my life. while i was (and still am as of now) a political science major, it has never felt right. through some career discernment activities and workshops (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) and discussions with my parents, advisors, and friends (“moreau week 5 qqc by '' moreau fye week 5), i’ve discovered that i want to transfer to the mendoza college of business to be a real estate developer. what stopped me from applying to mendoza in the first place was that i wanted to engage in work that would improve the lives of other people. a career in business did not seem like that kind of work. reflecting on the hesburgh documentary changed my line of thinking on that. hesburgh proved that no matter what career you chose, you can make the world a better place (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). even though he is a priest, practically the job most directly oriented with making the world a better place, he showed through his work with congress on the civil rights bill that you do not need to be a politician to make meaningful change. but i cannot grow scared of acting in this way. as the story of dean cole shows us, despite acting in the right way, we can find ourselves in dangerous situations (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). we need to remain strong in our principles in these moments. what cole does when he is harassed by the policman is one such strategy, and one that i plan on using. its to think of how our actions will impact others. while i hope to never end up in a situation like that of dean cole, using such a strategy will allow me to stay resolute in following through with my mission statement no matter the situation. with this in mind, my next three years here at notre dame, i will work towards a career in business with my personal mission statement in mind. i’ll learn why the inequalities in society exist and choose a career and company that is committed to fixing these issues. integration .pdf march 3, 2022 moreau eulogy andrea had to learn that life was not always going to be as easy as it had once been. she knew that she could always get the outcome she wanted if she put in the work, and it led her to believe that it would always work this way. getting into her dream university, she learned that the real world was much harder than high school. being away from home was something she always wanted, but within a month it presented itself as one of the hardest challenges of “adulthood”. but getting through life with no hardships or negative events is not realit’s not life. andrea believed that the beauty of life was in getting to see how good the good moments are when we have them, but it can only be achieved with the difficult times that one could see. it is important to understand that everything in your life that you tie no meaning to can all be taken away from you in an instantand you can be left with nothing. it is then that you appreciate what you have with a deeper meaning and you start to see the beauty in things that you never thought you could see. academics had always been her strongest sense of achievement, and having to let that ideal go once she got to notre dame was hard. she found out that there is more to a person than just being smart and good at school, which is something that scared her when thinking about her future. always showing so much interest in the body and health, andrea knew she wanted to go into neuroscience. not only was this something that she had a great interest in but it definitely was a career that would benefit the world. as hime’s three questions about the future resigned in the process of figuring out if this was the right path for her, he led her to not only ask herself how it would impact others but also herself in the long run. a successful career, as hime mentioned, is not one that meets others’ expectations of you, but that you meet your own. there needs to be a good amount of self-reflectionbut not too muchand it has to be the right one. as tasha eurich explains: “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect” (eurich). in this way, we can avoid negative self-talk that will only lead us to spiral more into our fears and insecurities. humility, kindness, and selflessness were her greatest convictionsshe believed they made the foundation for any moral human being. the things that you do in your life do not matter, no matter how great you think they are if one’s character is not good, to begin with. inspired by the life of father hesburgh, “i believed education had to have morals, but there had to be a way to balance faith and academics” (hesburgh film). academics was something that she had always resigned with but she soon learned that life is not much with them if you do not use them in the right wayand that starts with the person you are. also, being content with what you have and appreciating the little things rather than overseeing them also made the biggest difference in her life. how many people would not want the same opportunities that she got to have? complaining and being negative takes away from appreciating the fact that even having a roof over our heads is enough to be grateful. everyone with whom andrea formed relationships meant so much to hermore than they would know. friends and family took a certain role in her life that filled it with comfort, joy, and love. it taught an important statement of life: to never take anything or anybody for granted. everyone who comes into your life is there for a reason, either for a lesson or a blessing. you can always learn something about somebody else and yourself by the interactions that form our daily life. she came into contact with so many unique and inspiring people that it was hard not to learn anything from anyone at all times. daloz parks mentioned, “mentors are like that: posing questions that go straight to the heart and the heart of the matter” (parks). while being grateful for those who she loved and who loved her, andrea found a special form of relationship with those who had her best interest at heart and helped to guide her. individuals who would be inspiring in even the little things, like when it came down to kindness and compassion for others, were something she could greatly appreciate and learn from for herself. lastly, no matter how hard times got, she never gave up because she knew god was by her side. her relationship with god was one that she valued greatly and knew was the most important thing in her life. she learned that sometimes there was not much that she could do but rather let go and let god. being a perfectionist in nature, andrea had to let her faith and trust in god overcome any worries and anxieties that seemed to get in the way. knowing that god has everything written out and that it was okay to find peace in that, gave her much comfort. one can only do so much as in being a good person and never giving up for the things one wants but the rest can be left to god. one can only do so much as a human being, but using our talents and opportunities to make this world a better place is one that andrea sought to deeply hold close to heart. andrea always emphasized how short this life is, and that many people are just trying to stay alive but not truly live. with kindness, god, and resilience, one can live a beautiful and meaningful life that they can appreciate at the end of the day rather than forcefully seek. works cited barca, jerry, director. hesburgh. notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/auth/login.aspx. himes, michael. three key questions . parks, sharon. big questions worthy dreams . jossey bass. phd, tasha eurich. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way).” ideas.ted.com, 2 june 2017, ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. capstone integration “my mission is to do all that i can to find the most joy in life, as well as bring joy to all others that are a part of my life. i will do this by seeking out experiences that enable me to learn, grow, and broaden my perspective of life and the world. i seek to gain an understanding of those that are completely different from me, and to be open to listen and learn from them.” in order to gain the most fulfillment in life, i must leave my comfort zone and search for diversity. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i may be content and happy with my scheduled and systematic life, but i can gain more joy by altering my lifestyle to enable new experiences. nothing can be learned without first experiencing changes whether it be in setting, mindset, or some other form. i am a creature of habit so it may be challenging for me to go out of my way to obtain new experiences and thrive in new environments, but in the long term it will be an advantage in best understanding others around me and realizing how their mindsets may differ from mine. “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles.” ("dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). our differences are our strengths and must be celebrated and accepted. diversity and differences enable growth and acceptance, which is one thing i want to promote and provide in this world. “i want to find success in the form of contentment and happiness, in all areas of my life including spiritual, academic, and personal aspects. i want to live as a good model of the catholic lifestyle, and to be a role model for all those that are younger than me and are in need of inspiration. father hesburgh is the perfect role model of a person who is willing to do anything to benefit others as revealed when he said, “well the book sold out and i kept my job,” when referring to his outspoken behaviors that may have been frowned upon by some but ultimately was the right thing to do to benefit the majority ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). i hope to leave a legacy, not in the sense of a job or career, but instead based upon my morals.” i want to live a life for more than myself. in order to best fulfill this goal, i must ponder every decision wisely. the next generation is dependent on those preceding them, so i know it is my responsibility to leave a legacy of goodness and hard work for the younger generations to use as a model and as inspiration. it is in human nature to be https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144076 selfish, which will make this goal challenging at times, but with motivation and the knowledge that it will benefit more than me i can remain focused and oriented towards the good. “i want to be independent, to lead, and to be responsible for my own life. i hope to find something to gain in all of my suffering and to never quit at anything i find challenging. i will seek out opportunities to prepare myself for the future and plan ahead so as to be most ready for what lies ahead.” i often find myself relying on others and mimicking my behaviors based upon social norms and expectations. it is important for all people to live unique and independent lives, so i must strive to do so myself. independence is key to happiness, because self love comes first. especially in a college environment, it can be challenging to differ from the norms, but it is always acceptable to form one’s own path and work towards happiness and success in uniquely individual ways. the first step i must take is to stop judging others based on their differences, but embrace their confidence and use it as inspiration to derive my own courage from. “i want to have a family and be wholeheartedly devoted to them. i also will continue to be a support for my family, and always be present to help them through any difficulties they may face. i want to love myself and be happy with all i have done and all i continue to do. i want to find self worth. ultimately, i want to grow as a person so that i can live up to my potential and be all that i can be for the loved ones in my life and all others around me.” although independence is important, it is necessary to form and maintain relationships that add joy to my life and enable me to love wholeheartedly. “and at that moment, really, i felt comfort and peace and had the sensation of maybe god can do something about this situation. maybe there is something more about my life” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). this quote from week 6, reminds me that there is more to life than myself, even though suffering may be challenging it can benefit those around me. in order to grow with my family and hold onto meaningful relationships, i have to put forth time and effort to express my love and care for those in my life. as we learned during week 1, the world, especially with the growing prevalence of technology, is very fast paced which can tend to serve as a distraction of what is truly important in life. family comes first and the foundation of all of my growth and abilities to endeavor upon new unique experiences is dependent on my support system. by devoting myself to my family, i will give myself something to work towards–their happiness and well being. they can serve as my inspiration https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144118 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144118 and as reminders that there are other people that i must take into account, for my growth is beneficial to them as much as it is to me. moreau integration paper #3 moreau fye integration #3 a work in progress i. how it started when i first read the prompt for this integration paper, i would be lying if i didn’t say i was extremely discouraged. it didn’t help that i was looking over the assignment the weekend before midterms which i had spent studying, crying, and studying some more in hesburgh library. yes, hesburgh—the very same man whose documentary we watched, who changed the world, and was the epitome of the person we are all trying to be. and what had i accomplished in his library you might ask? 24 hours of studying that, if i was lucky, might earn me a b on an orgo exam. safe to say, i felt extremely pathetic and questioned my entire existence and life’s purpose. the paper continued to loom over my head for the rest of the week (yes, in part due to the fact that i had pushed it off to study some more for, yet again, that same orgo exam). i lied in bed thinking about what my eulogy might consist of if i had died that day, and i think it would go a little like this: corinne. daughter and friend. 2002-2022. to nineteen years of chickening out, stressing, and studying. “hmmm. that’s a little short,” you might think. yeah, that’s what i thought too. but when it comes down to it, that’s probably because i have accomplished nothing. i didn’t even get into the university i spent all of high school working so hard to get in to. i can’t even get myself to go to the gym once a week for crying out loud! i know that economic, athletic, and political achievements aren’t everything. in fact, when i think of a life well lived, i think more of all the relationships i am lucky to have. i do my best to be supportive of my friends and family, the same way that they’ve always been there for me. but, i still think it’s important to highlight other means of success as well to emphasize why i feel that time is running out and why i should be spending a much smaller portion of my time on things that shouldn’t mean as much to me as they do (i.e. school). at the end of the day, there is so much more that i could do for those that i love, and my time would be better spent doing so. our moreau conversations have greatly shifted my view on life and have inspired me to be the absolute best version of myself. ii. how it’s going so, how am i going to do this? well, obviously it’s easier said than done, but based on all of the reflection i’ve done these past few weeks and the sources we’ve investigated, i’ve identified a few areas of my life that i would like to improve: first, i asked myself the question sister aletheia encourages everyone to ask themselves on the daily: memento mori? “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). my memento mori is family and friends. even if i’m stuck with the most boring job imaginable, i know i would be happy as long as i am surrounded by my friends and family. these relationships mean so much to me; they have provided me with so much support and happiness, and i know i would be nowhere without them today. when i asked my mom what she sees as my greatest desire in life, she responded with “your family and friends” (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). relationships have always been my memento mori, and they are an area of my life i will never stop valuing. in a follow up question during my discernment conversation, my mom said that i’ve been at my very best while at college. she says it's because i’ve been under less stress. stress and anxiety is always something i’ve struggled with, and one of the largest areas i hope to work on as i try to achieve a life well lived. sometimes i worry that it’s going to start affecting my relationships, especially my new ones at school since it’s usually where i feel the most stressed. i don’t want to scare anyone off. according to pico iyer, the world health organization (who) is concerned with the levels of stress around the world and their effects on people’s lives. he is quoted saying, “such developments are saving american corporations three hundred billion dollars a year; more important, they’re a form of preemptive medicine at a time when the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating that ‘stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the developments he is referring to are studies that show rest and relaxation are key to lowering stress levels. i feel that a productive way for me to incorporate rest and relaxation into my life is through journaling. this new year, i’ve tried to start a short journaling routine. of course, whenever i get stressed, that’s the first thing to go even though it might be the most important to maintain in times like those. some prompts i’ve found especially worthy of reflecting upon are those that consist of what questions. “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). when facing a particularly stressful situation, reflecting on what is at the root of my stress rather than all of the reasons why i need to be stressed has been the most productive at helping me calm down and move forward to a life well lived. for example, sometimes i journal to the questions: what am i grateful for? what is causing me the most worry? what do i want to achieve today? of course, when deliberating your outlook on life, a question that’s bound to come up is what are you planning to do careerwise? thinking of a career does stress me out a little (surprise, surprise). i am confident that medical school is not the right environment for me, but with a biology degree, i’m stuck on what else i can do. i know that biology is a subject i love, so i am trying to maintain a more open mindset regarding the future. the center for career development is helping me do so: “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life,” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience” by the center https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ for career development moreau fye week four). it’s definitely reassuring to hear that my career is not defined by my major. i still have time to make decisions, i still have time to investigate many opportunities, and i still have time to figure out my vocation. to live a life well lived, i think another area i need to grow in is self-love. “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgements, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (tattoos for the heart by father gregory joseph boyle moreau fye week seven). we all make mistakes and we all have bad days. just because i think i was awkward in a situation, or i didn’t say something exactly right in a conversation, i can’t beat myself up over every little thing i do wrong. it’s exhausting and completely counterproductive to a life well lived. father hesburgh wasn’t concerned with how others perceived him. “he did a lot of things that people would have thought as not particularly priestly, he was entrepreneurial” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh focused on his agenda. he did what he believed was right without worrying what other people would think. i know to become the person that i want to be, i need to adopt this same mentality. iii. how it ended with these areas of improvement in mind, i hope i can make changes and shape my life to live in a way that earns a eulogy as follows: corinne was always an avid disney fan—a proud disney adult through and through—so i thought it would be best to memorialize her life and our memories through the disney characters she embodied best. those that knew her well knew that corinne’s favorite character was mike wazowski. she always claimed that, in actuality, they were the same person. like mike, she was short, a terrible singer, and a great friend. though she liked to give her best friends a hard time, you knew that it was always out of a place of love. she liked to joke, and if she joked with you, you knew she truly cared. like mike wazowski, she was there for you through thick and thin. though she might not break as many company policies for you (she was always afraid of authority, wasn’t she?), she would offer all of the support that she could. and speaking of a fear of authority, corinne truly embodied the character fear from inside out. skittish and stressed, her mind was all over the place—we all know fear was in control of her mood panel. but while she saw her fear as a weakness that inhibited her, i saw it as a strength. even though everything scared her—and i truly mean everything: test taking, introducing herself, driving—she did it all anyway. she once told me that the first time she does anything new, even something as simple as parking on a different street, she would get so stressed she thought she might cry. but she did it every time anyway, even if she had to do it while pushing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955#:~:text=download%20_tattoos%20on%20the%20heart_%20%2d%20chapter%208_%20jurisdiction%20(1).pdf https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 through tears. i found that that made her brave, empathetic, and a better friend to those during their moments of vulnerability. she never judged someone for what they were stressed about or what they were scared of. you could talk to her about anything. and how could i possibly conclude this without comparing her to one of the disney princesses. if corinne were any of the princesses, she would have to be anna from frozen. not the leader like her sister elsa, or the charming optimist friend like olaf, but the determined and hardworking best friend who never gave up on those she loved. those who ever had the pleasure of working with corinne would know that her work ethic was unsurpassable. she never submitted anything until she was proud of what she had created. though she might not try as many new things or get involved in an array of activities, she would support her friends along every step of their journey while she worked hard at the few things in her life. like anna, her family and friends came first and everyone could count on her to see them through hard times. but as much as corinne loved disney, there is no character who can embody her spirit wholly. her friends and family always came first. she was extremely empathetic and supportive. she could make you feel better after any hard day. she was a delight to be around. she is someone i am very grateful touched my life. capstone integration francesca’s guide to a life well lived everything that we have learned in moreau has been in order to help us live a life well lived. every week is another step towards that goal. i am so fortunate to have been able to be in such a great moreau class that truly inspired me to live a life well lived. thanks to nhat and my whole moreau class i now know what defines a life well lived and how i can best strive to live my own life that way. our first week of moreau this semester was about slowing down. life moves pretty fast for people and things like stress and anxiety are becoming way more common than they used to be. it seems as time goes on things like this are becoming more prevalent. i think we all just need to slow down. everyone has so much pressure on them to be successful and to do amazing things. the pressure of always needing to be moving can be detrimental to someone’s health. sometimes i wish we could just press pause on life. i am lucky that in my life i haven’t had too many experiences that have put a lot of stress on my life. i tend to be ok with slowing down but i might take that too far at times and just do nothing too often. in order to live a life well lived i just need to get to that middle ground (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). father ted hesburgh is such a huge inspiration for a life well lived. if i had to pick one person from notre dame whom i know lived their life to its fullest potential and in the best way possible it would be fr. hesburgh. he is truly an inspiration in every aspect of life. from the way he delt with politics to the way he delt with students fr. hesburgh did everything with kindness and humility. if i really want to know how to live a life well lived i should really just look at his life. although i don’t know if i will do things nearly as great as fr. hesburgh did, any little thing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ i do to be more like him can contribute to living a life well lived (“hesburgh” film by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). the best life well lived is one that is lived with joy. not just happiness, but joy. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). a true life well lived can be lived with a good mix of joy and happiness. it’s okay to not always feel happiness. it’s a fleeting feeling. to live one’s life with joy is to live a life well lived. one week of moreau was focused on career development. i understand that discerning my career will help me better understand my life and how to live it well, but spending a whole week of moreau on it seems unnecessary. i’m a freshman in college. i don’t know exactly what i want to do with my life and at this point in my life i don’t need to. maybe moreau should focus on how different careers can contribute to a life well lived instead. whatever future career i have in business i hope to do what makes me happy but most importantly i hope to do what’s right because that is how my life can be best lived ("exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). when determining if you are living your life well, it’s important to listen to other perspectives. sometimes you can overlook something you are doing because to you it is so normal or maybe you’re even in denial. in moreau class, we had to interview someone in order to learn more about ourselves. this activity was so important because it gave me an outside perspective on how i was projecting myself to others. to live a life well lived it’s important to be presenting yourself in a positive way. life isn’t well lived if you are making people hate you. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/472889/download?download_frd=1 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 when i surveyed my friend abby, it greatly helped me improve the way i was living my life (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). you don’t have to go through some great tragedy and have some sort of revelation to start living a life well lived. dr. jihoon kim, a man who became paralyzed in a snowboarding accident, may have done that, but that doesn’t mean i have to (“five minutes” grotto network moreau fye week 6). obviously my life hasn’t been perfect, but i am so incredibly privileged. i mean i go to notre dame. but just because i come from privilege does not mean i don’t know how to care for others. to live a life well lived in the best way i just need to have morals, compassion, goals, etc. i don’t have to go through trauma to have those things. i just have to learn and grow. of course inclusion is important in a life well lived. you’re not living your life well if you’re being a bad person, and excluding people makes you a bad person. pope francis said it best when he said “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis moreau fye week 7). a life well lived includes relationships. inclusion isn’t just not excluding people. it’s about forming solid relationships with anyone and everyone and just being that good person that everyone needs in their lives. sometimes all you need to do is be that person that people go to for accompaniment (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). the last 3 weeks of moreau were about inclusion and honestly i don’t want to write a separate paragraph for each one. they all basically talked about the same thing with different articles. yes, to live a life well lived you can’t discriminate. duh. just be a good person and don’t https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing be racist, homophobitc, and all that stuff. honestly if you can’t do that stuff you have a lot more to worry about than leaving a life well lived. maybe try being a decent person first (moreau fye weeks 10, 11, & 12). basically to sum it up: lot’s of factors go into living a life well lived. what’s most important is that you are living a life that you want to be living. key factors to a life well lived include: slowing down at life, being like father ted hesburgh, living with joy, choosing a good career, thinking of how others perceive you, building good relationships, and simply being a decent person. although i know my life will be nowhere close to perfect, i do know that i can always try my best to live a life well lived. and if at any time i find myself struggling, i should just find my way to duncan hall and see what nhat nguyen has to say. moreau capstone jackson hole wyoming, jay’s lounge in south bend, the university of illinois quad, the 99th floor of the willis tower, north quad playing spikeball, notre dame. this semester has been filled to the brim with different activities, different places, and most importantly different people. my life here can be very accurately described by how i put it in week 13, it’s been very similar to an upward trek up a mountain. there have been so many peaks, and when i look around at everything in my life i realize how far i’ve come along and how truly spectacular the view from that moment in my life is. of course with peaks, comes valleys. this semester has had its fair share of valleys as well. at those points in my life, and looking at the path it takes to get out of it, i get discouraged on the trek. sometimes it feels like the effort to get out of it is too much, but without fail, motivation in the form of a friend, or sudden spark of inspiration comes, and i get the energy to keep moving forward. after surmounting the valleys i gain a better understanding of myself and gain an appreciation of the path when i’m not in a valley. i feel that on this journey, i have taken heed of eurich’s article “the write way to be introspective” and have begun to think about myself (eurich). i am a very emotional person, but i try to never let my emotions show, and i always put others before myself, almost to a fault. this has never really been a hindrance in the past, but recently if i’m going through a valley, it makes it that much harder. i realized i needed to take a good long look inwards, and figure myself out and how i could change myself to live a healthier life for myself. i did not want to change the fact that i lived for others. that said i realized that i may have been putting others above myself to the detriment of myself. part of my growth here was finding a way to say “no” whether directly or in my actions, if taking on that task brought more burdens on me than it did benefits to the other person. in week 5 i discussed all of the roles i had in others lives, including a friend, mentor, person to rely on, and someone to discuss their hardships with. i love listening to others' problems, as i have never been the best at talking about myself, but have always been a fairly good listener. this led to myself, again, internalizing a lot of my problems while helping others first. i was able to realize this at some point during this semester and have been working on my communication skills. i am still not the greatest at talking about myself, but i believe i can use that as a strength to help people around me. i know there are a plethora of people like me who have difficulty talking about themselves. i understand how they feel so i believe i am more adept at helping these people. the week 10 article ``accompaniment” and the story of the doctor who was cared for by those in a community whom he was supposed to be helping really struck a chord with me (reifenberg). i wish to be known as a person who will help anyone in need no matter what. that is part of my drive for reflective leadership: i want to be a leader through service. i don’t need to be the person who takes charge of a situation, or someone who is at the front of the group telling people what to do and where to go. i want to be the person who people choose to follow because they look up and admire the actions i do. this semester, i have also thought about how i can contribute to social change. one of the articles that helped me reflect on a criteria on whether my actions are worth doing is from week 3 with fr. michael himes “three key questions” including: “is this a source of joy?”, does it use my talents to the fullest?, and “is this a general service to the people around you?” (himes). i want my actions to bring joy to the people around me, but thinking about doing something because i was simply good at it never had really occurred to me. thinking about it, if i am good at something, and that something brings joy to others, i’ll be able to bring more joy than if i do something i am not good at. these questions however are only a starting block. just because it follows all three of these criteria does not mean i should be content. thinking back to week 11 and building an anti racist vocabulary, i realized something. i cannot be content with staying stagnant on doing the same things that i deem “good” all the time, because there are many faults in myself, and with society as a whole, that i don’t even realize. what i need to do is be more aware of these wrongs that i and society commit around me, and actively work to correct them. it’s easy to stay in the box in which life puts you in from when you were born. however, as we discussed in week 12, to live a fulfilling life for me, wisdom is a necessity, not intelligence but wisdom. wisdom is not something gained by doing the same thing every day over and over again. wisdom is gained through breaking out of the comfort zone which you live in and doing something that will bring about a change, even if you step on some toes while doing so. i’ve always thought of myself as a good person. after this semester, moreau, and everything life has thrown at me, i realized how much i need to change in order to be a reflective leader who has a drive for social change. i’m in the process of finding the balance between living for others, while not hurting myself because i place so much of myself in them and end up hurting myself because of it. i’m continually trying to be a service oriented leader, becoming someone people aspire to be because of the light they exude through their life. lastly i need to figure out how to break free from the chains society has placed on me. i’m going to throw off the implicit biases that i have, and become an unbiased force for change in a society in need of changing. moreau capstone integration april 29, 2022 the evolving and winding paths of life as my first year of college comes to an end, i realize that i have just started a significant chapter in my life, one that has entailed struggle and obstacles, but one that has also brought forth friendships, growth, and a life i never would have predicted. college is only one of the many chapters that i will experience and reflect on as i continue to navigate through my life. as i reflect on my experiences of the past, the valuable lessons that i have learned from merely one year of college, and think about what the future entails, i have come to realize that pursuing a life well lived is critical to the enjoyment of future experiences and overall growth as not only a student but as a person. what i previously considered to be a life well lived, has greatly been altered since setting foot on a new path which has invited me to think about the true meaning of living such a life and inspired me to start thinking about the different things that i can do to reach this said life. a life well lived is one that comes in various forms and is subject to change as a person grows and develops, this was the case with my previous conception of a well lived life, as my ideas and understanding of life has evolved, i have made it a mission of mine to pursue a well lived life so that i made find internal happiness in all aspects of my life. an integral part of pursuing a life well lived is being present in the day to day events and interactions of life that make our lives the meaningful experiences that they are. it is these meaningful moments and interactions that are pivotal to the development of our character and expose us to learning more about ourselves and others. nowadays, this crucial aspect of life has been hindered by the development of technology and the virtual lives that many of us take too seriously and indulge ourselves in. in obsessing over our lives with technology, it is more common to miss the significant events both small and large in life that may contribute something profound to us. additionally the rise in technology has caused many people to “feel as though we are standing next to a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded, changing with every microsecond” ( moreau, week 1). in pursuing a life well lived, i aim to lower the noise and narrow my focus on the important and real life events that are transpring around me. additionally, in focusing on the real life events that occur around me, i will be fixating on another prominent aspect of pursuing a life well lived, which is using internal and external struggle as a source of motivation and not stray away from experiencing this type of struggle. there have been various times over the course of my life in which i felt that if i avoided any factors that might contribute to my struggle, i will be able to succeed more effectively. however, this previous conception was entirely incorrect. in order to truly achieve a life well lived, we must climb the mountains of struggle and at times unfairness that surround us and use any of the lessons that we attain throughout the journey and apply them for the betterment of ourselves (moreau, week 2). next, as previously mentioned, pursuing a life well lived entails using both internal and external struggles we encounter throughout our lives as motivation. throughout my life, i understand that there will be inevitable times of darkness in which i feel my grip on hope slipping away. i have already experienced this in the past and many others around me have told me that they have also shared this experience. however, an important aspect that we must continuously work on in order to achieve a life well lived is the perspective in which we view our problems. as previously stated, there will be times in one’s life in which a time of darkness is experienced, however, it is important to note that in facing the darkest realities of life, we find light in them (moreau week 3). through such experiences, we are put in a situation in which we come to realize many things about ourselves. the light that emerges from the dark experiences can come in a variety of forms such as personal growth, realization of the things we have around us, or a change in our lives that may have been better for us than previously thought. moreover, in addition to improving our perspective on the events of life, it is also important to use both our negative and positive experiences to guide us towards what we want our lives to consist of. an important aspect of pursuing a life well lived is using our experiences, growth, and interests to explore career paths which we will be content with for the rest of our lives. as i explore my interest through my classes, i have come to realize that i particularly enjoy learning about genetics and this has prompted me to explore this career path. however, regardless of if a person has made a decision on what they want to do with their lives or if they are still exploring by actively engaging in the process, taking ownership, and utilizing the tools at their disposal will allow them to reap the benefits of a satisfying professional life (moreau, week 4). additionally, as i interact with new individuals and ideas, i have found that i am growing and developing personal views and opinions about certain topics that are prevalent in the world or in my life. however, as i explore these topics and my opinions, i have found that there are certain conversations which are sometimes harder to have than others. the ability to have difficult conversations and engage in topics that one is passionate about is critical to pursuing a life well lived (moreau week 5). one should never stray away from having a difficult conversation as it is these conversations that are essential to our learning process and sharing of ideas that are important to us or others. moreover, exploring ideas about ourselves and developing views on not only the world around us but views about ourselves is a very important part of achieving a life well lived. introspection and developing a positive self view of ourselves are all goals that a person should strive for. in the past, i typically viewed myself in a negative light and would often be asking the wrong questions when performing introspection that would release a host of unintended consequences (moreau week 6). however, in addition to learning the value of having a positive self view, i have learned how to attain it and how to perform introspection correctly by asking appropriate questions. in diminishing my tendency of asking the wrong questions and not focusing on the ideas which were not the root cause of the issues i was trying to resolve, i was able to learn a lot about myself and the positive aspects that i was missing out on for a long time. moreover, i have also come to learn that in helping others, we are able to help ourselves. the act or service of simply offering a hand to others is pivotal to us understanding what a life well lived means and making strides to achieve that life well lived. i have always enjoyed working with people and being able to make a positive impact in their lives whether it be miniscule or significant. if a person has the ability to help another, it is our moral obligation as people on the path to a better life to help that person. pope francis once stated, “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i”, separated from the other, we can only build the future by standing together and including everyone” (moreau, week 7). in helping others, we are able to learn about the values of solidarity and move towards making a change in not only the lives of others but our own, but developing our ideas of what it means to be good and helpful. additionally, in helping others or ourselves, we must also acknowledge one of the most powerful tools to do this effectively and one that drastically moves one closer towards the goal of a life well lived, optimism. optimism is an extremely important value to hold when encountering anything in life. many people around us in our communities or around the world, may be going through some form of struggle in which they themselves have lost their optimism that they will be able to prevail. that is why it is essential for one to always be optimistic, to be able to provide hope for others that may have lost it. the quote “if you can be pessimistic, you are basically deciding that there’s no hope for a whole group of people who can’t afford to think that way” clearly portrays this moral obligation of ours to be optimistic for the greater good (moreau, week 9). furthermore, one principle which i have decided to implement into my life to pursue a life well lived is inclusiveness. as a first generation latino college student, i have come to appreciate inclusiveness and the comfortable environment that i have found around me because it has made the transition from my home to here very easy. however, not many other students have been blessed with encountering inclusiveness and it is essential to promote it and practice it to give students the same opportunities and comfortability. the practice of inclusiveness is essential to incorporate into our everyday lives, as it not only helps us grow as individuals but also cultivates an environment of joy and comfortability for the many people around us. since arriving at the university of notre dame, i have also been reminded of the catholic roots to promote inclusivity and the importance that it serves in a community of people, including ourselves (moreau, week 10). in addition to the promotion of inclusiveness, another practice that can be implemented into our lives to pursue a life well lived is accepting and seeking out the diversity of opinion. growing as individuals entails exposure to information which we may or may not agree with and making a decision of which we accept based on our moral or individual principles. however, it is important to seek out information and sources which allow both sides of an issue or particular case to be explored. in exploring multiple perspectives and hearing different parts of information from two different sides, we are able to avoid formation of echo chambers in our lives and the community around us (moreau week 11). this contributes to a life well lived as it allows individuals to experience a life in which they can make their own informed decision based on the information that is available to them. finally, one of the most important aspects i seek to incorporate into my life is courage. courage is a driving force which provides us the ability to engage in even the most daunting of tasks and not stray away from something that may be beneficial to our lives. it has been made clear that in life, there will always be difficulties and obstacles but with courage, the outcome may be drastically different. it is essential to maintain courage in the most severe of situations and do what we believe is right without any hesitation. in doing this, we are not only allowing ourselves to fight for what we believe in but ultimately inflict change in our lives and for those things for which we fight (moreau week 12). harnessing the courage to do even the smallest of tasks can prove to be life changing and inch a person closer towards a life well lived. as i explore my life, implement these ways of pursuing a life well lived, and continue to learn more, i am working towards my mission that i previously mentioned of attaining this life i desire. as i progress through life, i will continue to develop many missions which will interconnect with one another and this is one of them. i have set various missions for myself, such as being able to contribute to my community and contribute to the world through learning and teaching. however, i now realize that my mission of attaining a life well lived plays a bigger role in these other missions of my life than i previously thought. it is for this reason that i will continue to pursue my life well lived so that i may achieve my missions and find ultimate success and happiness in my life (moreau, week 13). capstone integration life as a daughter of god my identity at its deepest roots is a daughter of god. this identity inspires me to grow in holiness, kindness, and goodness. throughout my life, i seek to develop my relationship with god as his daughter through trust, faith, prayer, liturgy, and learning. because of the joy that comes in knowing he who loved us first (1 john 4:19), i desire to exemplify my relationship as his daughter in my everyday life so that others may see him in me and come closer to him. i look to st. therese’s example of the little way, seeking to offer the small moments of my life to god for his glory and to do small actions with great love. i am reminded to use my suffering to draw nearer to him and to lean on him, knowing that the things of this world will pass. while i do not know what my future holds, i try to cling to him so that i can best accomplish his will for me. presently, i recognize the desires i have and ask him for purity of heart in following them: 1) the desire to love and be loved; 2) the desire to behold beauty, 3) the desire to be impactful. the first i currently see in my relationship with god, my family, and my friends–those dear to me; the second, in god’s nature surrounding me, by traveling, in small moments, and in listening to music and playing the piano; and the third, in my pursuit of engineering to create solutions to problems i do not yet know. recognizing that vocations change throughout one’s life, i open myself to whatever path god guides me through. to write my above mission statement (“writing a personal mission statement activity” – moreau fye week 13) i needed to take some time to be alone with my thoughts–to stop all activity and just think. “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146102 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/145953 by pico iyer, ted – moreau fye week 1). we cannot simply go through our lives without pausing to think about what our lives mean. i do not think that anyone does. but the world makes a constant noise that is so appealing to drown out our own thoughts. when we stop and think, there are some things we can do to make it more fruitful. “why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future. this quote from “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau fye week 6 shows that we should have a mentality of thinking how we can move forward instead of staying trapped as a victim, even if we are feeling that way. “it was not for her to understand why god gave her so many blessings in life; she could only thank him and use it to the fullest” (integration 3 by – moreau fye week 8). we may not always understand why something has happened to us, but we can use it to grow. the christian life often calls for one to do the opposite of what the world would say. the priesthood and religious life are examples of this. “you give up a life of wealth, marriage, and most of all, your freedom of choice” ("hesburgh", produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). these are things that the world often says we should seek, but this shows us an example of how there can be happiness outside of these things. the world says that if you have money, power, or love, you will be happy. however, the world’s idea of love is overly centered on pleasure instead of what a more pure kind of love is expressed as a person giving themselves completely to another in a promise to remain with each other and having a family. however, religious life is completely the opposite of wealth, status, and pleasure – it often involves material poverty, obedience to superiors, and the denial of oneself. yet, priests and nuns are some of the most joyful people i have ever met. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146033 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146033 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/assignments/50008/submissions/35209?download=767108 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/145968 my time at notre dame has disconnected me from the outer world. for many people, though, politics seem to be everywhere. “we live in a 24/7 cycle of political news that saturates every corner of our culture. it seems like this has led to increased engagement in politics, but eitan hersh says that engagement with politics for many of us has actually become more shallow” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week 11). the news has become entertainment for some people, making it hard to find good sources of news. despite this, we can be attentive to the world around us so that we can remain active citizens by voting and seeking to improve the community around us. to be good people, we can take some advice from his holiness pope francis, “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye week 7). it is another example of living in a way that might be contrary to one’s initial thoughts. we also don’t know how much our help to another can affect them. “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). here, we can see an example of how tenderness and kindness can help another in a difficult situation. we can also be attentive to how other people around us feel. “in virtually any situation or image deemed valuable in dominant society, whites belong. the interruption of racial belonging is rare and thus destabilizing and frightening to whites and usually avoided” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost – moreau fye week 10). recognizing the patterns that exist in society help us to work for fairness https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146087 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146047 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146047 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146064 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146064 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146075 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146075 and be compassionate. it is not enough to simply know, however, “for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 – moreau fye week 12). something everyone must acknowledge is that one day we will die. “to us, death is exotic,” said joanna ebenstein, founder of morbid anatomy, a brooklyn-based enterprise that offers events and books focused on death, art, and culture. “but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times – moreau fye week 3). this quote means that in the modern time and living in a very developed country we have such an abundance of technology and medicine that we might expect to live until 70 or 80 years, if not more. we may forget that we could really die at any time because of causes that we cannot control. this forms how we think about our lives now because it reorders what is important. if i will die one day, it would have mattered more for me to spend time with people i love rather than watching movies all day. of course, there can be a balance. but we should live our lives enjoying the good and pursuing the wholesome. as for what i want to do, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). i can experience life in good ways and will discover what i like in that way. if i abandon myself to god, i realize that i can live my life as his daughter in many ways. god could call me to religious life, to be a sister, or to be a consecrated woman, but these are all ways i could serve him. my friend, ali mauritsen, said that god desires to reveal our vocations to ourselves, in a similar way that someone is excited to tell their friend a surprise (week 5 discernment activity by with ali mauritsen – moreau fye week 5. pasted at the https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ end). therefore, i can continue to live with trust in god as his daughter, knowing he will take care of me. week 5 discernment activity for my discernment activity, i spoke with my friend ali maurtison, a senior chemical engineering major studying for the mcat. first, we talked about what questions should guide what we do in our lives. i told her about a previous moreau activity, which had the questions of what am i good at, what does society need, and what do i like to do. however, a thought we had was that maybe these questions are not as significant as, or perhaps better summarized by, the question of what god wants us to do with our lives. for example, i met a religious sister who had been an engineer, but eventually found that god was calling her to a different vocation. therefore, it seems that maybe it did not matter as much that the engineering job answered the three questions, because god was asking something else of her. however, what she does now still answers those three questions, just in a different way. ali reminded me of my dreams to be an inventor, which was a word i had forgotten about for a while (the word “inventor”). she told me that what we do with our lives centers around the way in which we serve god. my favorite part of the conversation was that she said that god desires to reveal our vocations to ourselves, in a similar way that someone is excited to tell their friend a surprise. she could see how what i desired most in life is to serve god in the way he calls me to. moeau fye 4 march 2022 the pursuit of joy this integration is about what my own eulogy would be and what it would probably resemble. there are many valuable lessons i have learned throughout life and i have learned these through meaningful life experiences. it is because of these meaningful experiences and relationships i have formed over time that i am able to live a life well lived. something that mae mae was able to do was slow her life down. this was actually not one of her strong suits at first and something that she had to practice. she always had such bug goals in mind so she would always try to be working at them until she realized that she needed a new strategy. a good quote that expresses this is, “or, as they sometimes say around kyoto, ‘don’t just do something. sit there.’” (iyer). this quote comes from the saying “don’t just sit there, do something” and this saying comes from our need to constantly be busy or improving. but our concern to live life to the fullest could actually backfire and cause us to lose sight of what is important in life. this is why sometimes it is better to slow down and take breaks. mae mae realized this and knew that it was an aspect she needed to adopt in order to grow as a person. she also realized that because she was always moving so fast and trying to constantly train and improve, she sometimes forgot to appreciate the moment and live every moment to the fullest. mae mae was not a stickler for planning and just liked to go with the flow most of the time. this helped her live more in the moment and eventually find the right path that was meant for her. this quote from father hesburgh reflects this when he states, “it wasn’t how i expected to serve my country but i was serving in my own way” (hesburgh). this quote shows that even if we think we have our lives planned out, things do not always go as planned in life. but even if this happens, things still have their own way of working out and there are many different ways to reach your goals in life. just like how father hesburgh did not imagine that his life would plan out the way it did but he still lived a very meaningful life well-lived. mae mae also realized this and just liked to go with the flow of life. she just took the opportunities that came to her and everything ended up working out and leading her to the people that she would come to love more than anything. something important that mae mae had to learn was what she truly enjoyed in life and the difference between joy and happiness. just because you might like something one day, it does not mean that it brings long term happiness. this quote reflects this point and states, “what’s the difference between joy and happiness? it’s not a matter of whether this makes you happy or not because happiness is affected by many external factors (sleep, illness, hunger, loneliness, etc.). happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (himes). this quote shows that most of the time we act on happiness and think that it is joy but happiness is only short term. this can cause us to make long term decisions that do not actually align with our goals. mae mae recognized this through the experiences in her life and made sure to really pay attention to this as she went through life. this ensured that she found what brought her long term joy in life so that she could live a life well lived. but mae mae also started to realize that she would still need to plan some things out in order to achieve her goals. as she started to find interests and desires over time she realized that she would need to start planning things out more in order to pursue these goals. this quote reflects that and it states, “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process.” (luzzo). this quote reflects this topic well because it shows that it is very easy to lose track of what is truly important in life at times so having a plan can really help combat this struggle. mae mae also had experience losing sight of the important things in life at times and had ended up taking the wrong path even though it was not something she truly wanted. but when she took some time to plan out her life and really think about what she wanted and what brought her joy, she was able to get back on track. she said this was something that helped her live every day to the fullest. mae mae also utilized her loved ones and the people closest to her to figure out what was best suited for her and to get an outside perspective. this was able to help her realize the career and path in life that she should take and if it was best suited for her. at the time, she was still considering going the pre-med route even though she was initially planning on going into engineering at first so she asked him for advice on this since he was the person that knew her best. he said to follow whatever path made her most happy but from his perspective, he thought she was more suited to be an engineer. he said how he always saw her fixing things around the house and tinkering with things and that she had great problem solving skills. he also saw how she enjoyed these things more than anything else and how her eyes lit up when doing this. this influenced her decision because it was clear that not only did she enjoy doing this, but it seemed like it was what she was meant to do and what she was best suited for. perhaps the most important thing to mae mae to living a life well lived was the meaningful relationships she formed with others. a good quote that reflects this is, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (fracsis). people are all connected and no one’s life lived is produced or lived well without the impact of others around them. we are the people we are today because of those interactions. these relationships are what give our lives meaning and help us live a life well-lived. mae mae found this out for herself as she went through life. she struggled greatly in her past and felt like she was alone going up against the world sometimes. but she continued to work hard because she thought that these things must not matter. but as she kept going through life she was able to find people who did truly love and care for her and these people gave her more life and motivation than anything else. she found that these relationships are what connects all of these other aspects of living a life well lived and helps you stay on track with these goals. works cited (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week two) (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) quinn capstone integration quinn 1 catherine wagner moreau fye april 29, 2022 capstone integration in order to pursue and fulfill a live well-lived, one must take the time to figure out what exactly a life well-lived entails. throughout this semester, i have been exposed to so many different sources of information and perspectives that have allowed me to reflect and indulge in what a life well-lived means for me personally. i have been able to discern what god is calling me to do with my life, as my eyes have been opened to my strengths, my desires, and my aspirations for the future. while i, by no means, have fully come to terms with and discovered god’s plan for my life, i feel as though i have a deeper understanding as to who i am and who i am destined to be. after this semester, i have formulated the following mission statement: as a catholic freshman girl at the university of notre dame, i aim to be a dedicated student and take advantage of all the opportunities that are presented to me. i strive to not only be a good student, but also a person of character. i pride myself on staying true to the beliefs i was raised to keep all of my life. my catholic faith is a big part of who i am, and it is the center by which i live my life on. i surround myself with like-minded people, mainly people who share the same beliefs as me. immersed in the diverse student body here at notre dame, i strive to share my beliefs with those who may be different than me, showing them why i believe what i do believe. i hold my people very close to me, and i make sure they know their worth. coming from living in a sort of “bubble,” i have learned so much about myself over the past several months. when i quinn 2 fail, i get back up again and take it as a lesson and a way to make changes. i know that it is okay to take time for yourself, and it is okay to not be okay. i am proud of who i am and who i am becoming, but i know there is lots of room for growth. i make it a mission every day to be the best self i can be, and i plan to continue on that journey (mission statement by moreau fye week 13). as i believe this mission statement fully encompasses what i want for my life, i plan to live by this for at least the next three years. in order to pursue a life well-lived, i must come in contact with myself. one cannot live a life well-lived if they do not love themselves and understand themselves. in order to understand and be able to make connections with others, we have to be connected with ourselves mentally and emotionally. these ideas are present in module 1 of the moreau fye course. in his ted talk, pico iyler claims that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week one). while it is oftentimes easy to get caught up in social media, what the world wants you to think of yourself, and who the world tells you you are, one must be confident in who they are and not lose contact with their true selves. i plan to stay true to myself and not let myself lose touch with who i am, in order to fulfill my mission statement. father hesburgh is a great example of what it means to live a life well-lived. in the hesburgh movie, it is stated that “what made him such an extraordinary figure as he didn’t really belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability in mankind” (hesburgh movie produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh spoke with so many people, from so many different backgrounds. in order to fulfill my mission statement and pursue a life well-lived, quinn 3 i strive to get out and meet new people. dr. robin diangelo also speaks on this topic in a way, claiming that “getting it when it comes to race and racism challenged our very identities as good white people” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). coming from a sort of “bubble” in my hometown, in college i hope to expand my circle and converse with people from all over in order to learn more about others and myself. this also relates to week 12, in which we learn about dean g. marcus cole, who states that “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i hope to become more informed on difficult issues in order to be able to share what i know with others and make the world a better place. in doing this, i must take action as well, to back up my words. while i tend to be a happy person and always strive to focus on the good, i learned in week 3 that one must come to terms with the fact that we will all die at some point. as was learned from sister theresa alethia noble, “focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). in my mission statement, i speak about how i have learned that it is okay to not be okay sometimes. i think that this correlates with sister theresa alethia noble speaks about, in that both of these ideas focus on the fact that life is not all sunshine and roses. in order to pursue a life well-lived, i must realize that my life is not and will not be perfect. taking the time to navigate one’s career journey, while it may be very difficult and frustrating, is an important step in discerning what one’s plan for living a life well-lived in the future encompasses. it is hard to choose a major and pinpoint what one wants to do with their life quinn 4 when there are so many options and different paths. i once read that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). while i have struggled a bit to decide on my major, i do feel that it is right for me. in my mission statement, i speak about how i want to stay true to myself and what i love. in the future, i hope to do this. i do not want to work a job just for the money. i hope to continue pursuing a major and a career that is right for me and for who i am meant to be. i believe that, if i do this and am working for something that i love, i will be living a life well-lived. while i am pretty certain about what i want to do with my life, it is often helpful to consult others and see what their viewpoints and thoughts are on what they think is best for you. in a recent conversation with my mom, she told me that in me, she is able to see “how much i value god, family, and friends” (interview with mary quinn moreau fye week 5). it was comforting to hear this from my mom, as i loved hearing that she sees this love in me. in my mission statement, i speak about how i hope to stay true to my beliefs. faith is such a big part of my life, and by keeping a solid prayer life and engaging with my faith, i believe i will be able to stay close with god and act on this faith daily. while yes, i do believe that it is important to spend time in self-reflection in order to learn more about oneself and what one’s calling is, too much time spent in self-reflection can often leave us more lost than when we started. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week 6). i believe that self-reflection is vital in pursuing a life well-lived, but i also believe that, at a certain point, one must learn to be confident in what they believe is their calling in life. in pursing a life well-lived, i must be confident in who i am and who i believe god is calling me to act as. quinn 5 i love my people, and i hope to keep them close. in pope francis’s ted talk, he states that “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i truly do believe in this statement, as i believe communion with others truly is what fulfills a person and keeps them going. living isolated from others is far from what i believe it means to live a life well-lived. as professor steve reifenberg states, one must “look beyond [their] immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i stated in my mission statement that i hope to surround myself with good people. in order to live a life well-lived, i strive to give more than i receive in my relationships with others. i desire to be a selfless friend who does what is right. in order to better oneself, it is important that one takes matters into their own hands. this idea is revealed in a podcast by hidden brains media, specifically focuses on politics in this matter. it states that “if they wanted to actually participate in politics, they would go about this all differently” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brains media moreau fye week 11). as this line states, one must follow up their words with real action. as my mission statement states, i hope to be some one who stays true to my beliefs. i strive to actually do this in both word and in deed. overall, while i am proud of who i am as a person, i know that there is so much growth i have ahead of me. in taking this moreau course, i have come to learn so much about myself and about others. i hope to take this knowledge and apply it to my life and my future so that i can best live out the mission statement i aspire to stay true to. quinn 6 sources: week 1: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week 3: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week 4: https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5: (interview with mary quinn): https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/ edit week 6: https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript week 9: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/e dit week 10: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/ edit week 11: https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ week 12: https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breath e-and-i-can-do-something/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ moreau integration final.docx park 1 bona gayoung park apr 29, 2022 fys moreau how to live as my time as a first-year at the university comes to its night, i have had the opportunity to reflect on my personal mission statement and how it orients my life. my mission is to develop myself, develop my family, and develop my community to be better and maximize happiness. after everything we have learned and achieved so far, i cannot be prouder of myself and the fellows. for me, my mission statement represents who i am as a person who is curious about learning and emphatic enough to care about others. i have big dreams for the short term and even grander ambitions for the long term, which i hope i will be able to achieve one day. in the shortest term, i will settle with learning as much as possible from the university. notre dame has been providing me with the ideal platform i desire to learn more about critical life concepts that’ll allow me to prosper in the future. to achieve any of my goals, i have to identify personal obstacles and find a way to respond to them. a significant limitation for me to achieve my goals and objectives in the first year has to be the change in the environment. the weather in south bend has been very different compared to my home. due to this, surviving in a new environment comes down to how i am able to handle it and move on to my objectives (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences moreau fye week six). the living situation in my quad room has also been a bit underwhelming. however, i have been trying to find ways of living a life well-lived, despite all the chaos of being a first-year student. park 2 it was able because, through the difficulties during my time in high school, i learned it is not a big deal if you fail. and ultimately, genuine comfort and happiness come as a surprise gift when you empty your mind and let go of your greed instead of chasing them. therefore, i am now a person who goes out for fresh air from time to time. i appreciate the midwest’s sunset, which i personally think is prettier than hawaii’s. i do some huddle runs very often. i work out regularly at duncan. i binge-watch k-dramas and read books. also, i look forward to coming up with more ideas for having meaningful breaks and taking care of myself here at notre dame. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). even though i have had a very complicated life where i have had to move from my home country and live in different countries, because of that, i was able to have some form of resilience and gain a lot of wisdom that can strengthen my own commitment (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). like i have done so far, i will always be focused on achieving new through learning new knowledge, practicing new skills, and experiencing new things and places. i will be learning various knowledge and skills in mechanical engineering and robotics for the next three years at notre dame. i will acquire work ethics and professionalism through internships and research. also, as i have lived, i will travel to more places. i will always grow into a more mature soul, slowly but gradually. there are many self-reflection questions that we have been able to gloss over in class that has essentially made me think of when it would be the most difficult to live this mission. as a part of it, we contemplated death (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). thinking about death, the prospect of it happening to me eventually is somehow frightening. i once had to contemplate death in past months especially when i contracted covid-19. after i overcame this, i thought it was essential to live park 3 my life on my terms, which is why i found inspiration from father hesburgh’s achievements and resilience in seeking out social justice in a time when it was controversial to do so which is what i hope to do in the future for the environment (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week one). in addition to that, i find solace knowing that pope francis is an advocate of science, as we can see through his speech where he encourages us to do good and help each other out by employing courage and creativity. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). in terms of academics, i was able to find interest in advanced level engineering classes with the school offering some of the best facilities and best teachers to enable me to succeed (“muerelo family center for career development” moreau fye week four). my interest in engineering will be key for me to achieve my mission statement of caring for the environment in the future. in my aspiration and career, i got interested in robotics because of my robotics team mentors’ accompaniment to their knowledge in engineering, as they are ordinary engineers who have 9-5 jobs but tried their best to put their free time/money to show the world of engineering to us without getting paid (even spent) and rewarded. because of this experience, the ultimate goal of my life has been giving my knowledge and technique to young adults in the form of education since i am a person who feels happy and satisfied by helping and giving to others, without considering whether they do that back to me or not. as gustavo gutiérrez notes, “some people are happy only if they are helping,” which is a statement i believe best defines me (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). park 4 towards community, my mission is clear; i want to develop my family and community, but the scope of my mission might likely expand beyond those set parameters in the future as i interact with many other people outside my race, gender, and sexual orientation. (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). learning moreau, we have been able to engage and indulge in various conversations that have allowed me to give an opinion on various issues. my engagement with the different conversations gives me a perspective on how my mission statement can be enhanced and improved. to our only home earth, i will always work for the sustainability of the planet and to save the ocean. from regular beach cleanups to scuba divings to the bottoms of the pacific ocean, i will never stop loving the pacific island and our mother earth. i will try my best to reduce plastic and disposable items in my life and in my dearest’s. i will always think of the sacrifices of animals just for our appetite and the beautiful creatures held in constricted tanks instead of a boundless ocean. trying my best to follow these pledges of my life philosophy, i look forward to the dawn of my another year at nd. prelab_lab3 moreau integration 3 effort in kindness and connection i want to thank you for being here today to celebrate the life of . there is a lot to say about hugh; however, if was to be described in just one word, the most suitable word would be effort. kindness, humor, strength, courage, and even intelligence are all subjective and based on one the view of or comparison to others. some may have described hugh as shy, while others knew him to be outgoing. still, the amount of effort he demonstrated in every aspect of life set him apart. although one’s effort may also be subjective, it is only subjective to the individual. effort is relative only to the effort they put forth in the past and hugh never failed to try his hardest in every aspect of his life. oddly enough, what defined a life well-lived for hugh was not based on objectivity. hugh did not care about the job he had, the clothes he wore, or even the amount of money he accumulated. instead, the thing that hugh wanted most in the world is a feeling that no one could ever truly know: knowing that he was important to someone else. hugh dedicated his life to the pursuit of one goal: becoming a mechanical engineer with the hopes of creating things that can only be seen as good. this was a hard task as pico lyer once said “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one) he spent the end of his high school career and most of his college career working on a program that would help those with disabilities connect to the world around them, weather its driving a wheelchair or typing on a computer. he put all his effort into creating something that will not only allow people to use technology but to feel in control and independent within their lives again. he worked tirelessly driving 2 hours every day over the summer to work on it in a lab at stony brook university. despite the effort hugh exhibited in order to reach his goals, it would not be incorrect to say that hugh experienced failure time and time again. while working on the project, playing sports, and even in academics. hugh never shied away from failure. in the movie hesburgh, it is said that “one doesn’t speak of human failures as well as human success” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). in fact, hugh seemed to speak more of his failures than of his successes. he believed that through discussing his failures like not making his high school basketball team or not being able to finish his project he felt talkimg about it allowed him to learn and move forward. when he was in danger of failing his calc ii class in his first semester at notre dame he talked about this failure with his professor and his parents. because he talked about his failure, he was able to make a plan with those he discussed his failure with and create a plan to try again. however, you don’t always get to try again. when hugh didn’t make the basketball team and discussed his failure with friends, they convinced him to try wrestling ich he continued with throughout college. hugh found that sharing failure allowed him to create connections, learn and discover new things. despite failures along the way, hugh did everything he could to become an engineer. nevertheless, it was the pursuit of his goal to create something good for others and his love of the process of pushing through failures that is a part large part of engineering that made hugh become a mechanical engineer. when reading about how one should choose a career path, hugh considered the question: “is this vocation / this role / this profession / this way of life that you are considering something you are good at? […] this can only be determined by other people” (“three key questions” by fr. michel himes moreau fye week three). hugh did not believe this at all. when hugh chose to go to notre dame he did so, in the belief the notre dame will provide him with the lessons and experiences required to be the person he wanted to be. he believed that he could learn to be good at anything. when he started wrestling a coach told him not to do leg moves in matches or practice because he wasn’t good at it and was better with other moves. however, because he pushed on anyway and it allowed him to win matches that he would never have with the limited skillset his coach wanted him to focus on. another quote hugh considered was, “you have to know yourself first— your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips)— before you can make effective career choices (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). hugh new above all he valued effort, kindness, and friendship, and he was interested in learning how things worked. however, going into college from a pandemic he felt as though he didn’t truly know his personality and he didn’t have any skills. nevertheless, he knew that through effort and the help of others he could developed the skills necessary to be a mechanical engineer and do something that aligned with his values. in an interview with one of hugh’s closest friends, hugh inquired, “what do you think i most value and desire in life?” hugh’s friend’s response was that hugh valued “meaningful, long-lasted connections and the ability to make a positive impact in the lives of others” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). hugh desired more than anything else to be a source of good and joy to others. his desire to be good for others didn’t come without struggle. he thought often about the question. “if god is good, why does he allow suffering…?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six). even though his greatest desire was to be a source of good he knew that not everyone would think of him that way and its possible that he could even become a source of suffering. but, something that hugh’s uncle once said is that one can only appreciate and truly experience joy and happiness if they have also experienced sadness. the things and the people that others appreciate in life are those that can offer them happiness or remedy their sorrow. hugh understood that he was living a life well-lived if someone smiled while he was around, and even if the memory or reminder of this led to some form of happiness. as stated by pope francis, “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven.) these interactions with the people both here and not made hugh’s life welllived —to have a good group of friends that mutually cared for one another and enjoyed the time they had together. it is also the bad interactions with those who were strangers, or even bullies, because every interaction provided the opportunity to learn and to grow. hugh would want to be remembered due to the connections and growth experienced by others because of him. hugh led a life well-lived because he had an impact on the lives around him. integration 3 hicks 1 david lassen moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the eulogy of – gone too soon when i think of , the first thing that comes to mind is how busy she was. she loved to occupy her life of course with her friends and family, but also with hard work. she was like most notre dame students where she could find herself becoming burnt out and, “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). she occupied her time with so many business clubs and yet still was there for her friends. she was always busy and she liked it that way. yet, she also tried to find the importance of mental health in her daily life and often would try to get herself a break. i think this is part of what she meant a life well-lived was. to her, living a good life was a life lived for other people, but not at the cost of her own health all the time. this was a value of hers that she wasn’t going to let anyone change. although we all have different versions of what we think a good life is, she stuck by this to keep her guided and focused. i think she of all people would appreciate the fact that father hesburgh said something that spoke on that same determination: “but i took a stand for something, and i wasn’t about to stop” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week two). when you take a stand for something, you should be prepared for backlash. and yet, he, and kathleen, kept going. they believed in what they fought for. i think in her own life, she found herself wanting to backtrack or make her beliefs seem different from what they actually were just to avoid https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 hicks 2 arguments with others. she wanted to be agreeable, so she avoided divisive subjects like politics. however, fr. hesburgh showed what it meant to live a good life and stick by his beliefs but still being friends and knowing so many people. if he was able to do this on such a big stage, i think it makes it seem more reasonable for the rest of us to do so in our own lives. kathleen was always such a positive influence for others, so i find it difficult now to speak on her death. but she was also a strong catholic who believed there was a life beyond our earthly time. if anything, her major goal in life was always to do jesus’ work here on earth so that one day she might also join him. but she was also a realist at the moments when she needed to be. like the nun who reminded her during a moreau class once said, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). i think this quote reminds us that most of us don’t want to accept the most basic aspects of life: we are born and then we die. it’s morbid to think in only those terms, but those are the facts. suffering and death are unavoidable. and because of this, if we only focus on the bright things that make us forget about the morbid ones, it isn’t genuine. but i also think this quote isn’t saying to have a negative outlook on life, but rather i think it’s saying to give your life more meaning because our days are numbered. i think living life and staying present in the moment gives us more happiness. in dark times, we can find the light and positivity to keep going. kathleen would say the same. i think it would be rude of me now if i did not mention the success kathleen had outside of her own personal life. her work serving the latino community with her finance and spanish degree from notre dame helped many in the texas community. she didn’t always know what she wanted to do though. up until about january of her freshman year, she didn’t even know https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 3 what major she wanted to be. but she stuck with her gut and lived a successful life by doing so. but she knew what it was like to feel misguided. she would agree with the article notre dame gave to her to help her own discernment that said, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). she knew while she might not have had the pure skill to do wall street level finances, she knew her warm personality would be better suited on a smaller level. we all should pick a career based on our strengths, which in turn helps other people the most. and that personality is what kathleen will probably always be best known for, and that’s the way she would've wanted it. her parents even told her at one point that, “you can live a good life through a good career, sure, but you want your eulogy to remember who you were as a person, not who a boss determined you were” ("week five discernment conversation activity" by joyce and philip hicks – moreau fye week five). this simple advice was quite effective for her. she would repeatedly tell me that she valued her happiness over any job. and happiness to her was making other people happy. i think we all here can attest to her bubbly personality and the weird jokes she always made that would make us all laugh. it took awhile to get her to open up to you, but once you did, it sure was worth it. i think at the end of her life, kathleen probably thought really hard about the life she had lived. that girl was always thinking about something, wasn’t she? she enjoyed thinking just to think, but she made sure it was never detrimental. afterall, “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). when she thought about the past, she always did so to prepare for a better future. she never wanted to ponder about a past https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 hicks 4 situation or event in terms of “what if?” she knew that effort would be futile, as she would be unable to go back and change it. but if she had made a mistake in the past, she would think about it for a while so she could avoid it in the future. maybe that’s what all of us here today should do as well. we can think about our past memories with her, of course, but she wouldn’t want us to be sad that we can’t go back to those moments. she would want us to be happy we got to even meet each other, and then use our experiences with each other to live an even better life. and like the religious person she was, i feel like it’s only fitting to end on a note from pope francis. he said, "... the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week seven). she loved the relationships she had with each and every one of us, those gathered here today and those gone before us. i think she would call all of us to go and live the best life we can, for the sake of others. we only have one life, and it’s quite limited and short when you think about it. and the way we get through life is through our relationships. life “flows” through them. let us remember our good moments we spent with her, and yet also change the future for the better through understanding that our lives are all about the connections we have with each other. thank you. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 ellis_capstone integration moreau first year experience mission meghan: the operation of a lifetime personal mission statement i am me, with all the complexities that make me who i am. i orient my life acknowledging the details and complexities that make me who i am. i will seek to learn, understand, and give. i will seek to ground myself with these intentions to guide my words and actions. my mission is to live my life as me, and to let my values drive me. i live with humility and integrity. i strive for inclusion, hoping that i can help people from all walks of life thrive. i think and act with compassion for the people and world around me. i ground my life in love, knowing that love will light the way. orienting my life to this mission: ● i will remember to rest and be kind to myself. i consider myself a compassionate person, but sometimes i forget to give myself that same compassion. there have been multiple times this semester where i wish i had remembered to take my foot off the pedal and take the time to rest. there was one week this semester where i had three exams and two papers due in the span of 72 hours, and slept maybe ten hours during that time. i definitely remembered the importance of being kind to myself after that. ambition is important, but so is rest. one quote that continues to stand out to me about rest comes from an article written by pico iyer that we read for the first week of moreau. iyer said that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as a musician, i particularly like the music analogy in this quote. rest gives our work makes our work more motivating and meaningful. i have learned that rest is an act of kindness that is crucial to my well-being. treating myself with kindness is something that i want to focus on. i’m not perfect and it’s unrealistic for me to expect perfection from myself all of the time. as father hesburgh said, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh by father theodore hesburgh moreau fye week two). i’m not going to meet all of my self-imposed expectations and i’m going to make mistakes, but that’s okay. for instance, it’s perfectly fine for me to finish with a b in organic chemistry. i’m trying my best and that’s what really matters. being kind to myself and remembering to be human is important. ● i will pursue my passions and try new things! i think this part excites me because i’m a curious person. i want to “look for the ways joy leads [me] forward” and “look at the ways joy leads [me] on to other questions” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). over the next three years, i plan to take a variety of courses in different subject areas because there’s no better time to ask https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 ellis 2 questions than the present. i want to lean into my curiosity. this curiosity will remain an important part of my well-lived life. trying new things scares me a little bit because i’m very cautious, but i believe that broadening my experiences is important for my well-lived life. i know that “the only way to know more about [myself] is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i know that my time in university is a great time to branch out and try new things, so i want to take advantage of all the opportunities that i can. i’ve seen my first snowfall, taken the train for the first time, and experienced so many new things during the short time that i’ve been here. i want to make sure i use this time to try new things and create memories that will last a lifetime. ● i will respond to difficult moments with compassion. not every moment in a well-lived life will be great. i’ve faced some major challenges in my future, and a lot of those issues are related to my health. this semester i was in the emergency room twice and had to take a month-long course of steroids. these challenges are unquestionably difficult to handle and i’ve struggled quite a bit to deal with them. we watched an interview with dr. jihoon kim for moreau that stood out to me. after dealing with health issues, dr. kim stated that “once i began focusing on what i can do already, it also changed my disadvantage as well” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). the issues i face aren’t fun (especially the health ones), but i’ve grown a lot from them. every moment is a learning opportunity, so i want to view my struggles as opportunities to grow. when i do experience difficulties, i choose compassion. i make the choice to be vulnerable and pick kindness. for instance, i made the choice to be vulnerable during welcome week and then i met some of my closest friends at notre dame. pope francis explains that “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). my well-lived life will be led by vulnerability and compassion. some of my most cherished moments come from acts of solidarity through vulnerability. ● i will cherish and support my loved ones. community is crucial to a well-lived life. my family is very important to me and i’ve missed them a lot this semester. i remember having a moment of realization about how much my family means to me when i was reminiscing with my mom during the conversation we had for the discernment activity (discernment conversation activity with mom moreau fye week five). my mom especially has helped me through this school year as i have struggled with health challenges at school. i want to make sure that i cherish my family. i hope to keep my family and loved ones close throughout my life because i can’t imagine my life without them. as i surround myself with my loved ones, i have to make sure that i am there for my loved ones just as they are here for me. i couldn’t do it without the support of my community and i want to do the same for them. steve reifenberg said that “solidarity is about our relationship with the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit ellis 3 other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). in my well-lived life, i will accompany my family and community through solidarity and support because i know that they do the same for me. ● i will uplift the people and voices around me. uplifting the people in my community is a personal goal of mine because i know what it feels like to be the one not heard. everyone deserves to be respected and listened to. the university says that we, as a community, “consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). this inclusion is incredibly important to me. inclusion can be as simple as including my pronouns when i introduce myself and not assuming that people celebrate the same holidays that i do. no matter how big or small the act, enabling other people to succeed is something i want to do throughout my well-lived life. uplifting the voices of the people in my community is also important. there are people in the communities that i belong in that aren’t heard like i am, even here at notre dame. it’s important to uplift those voices so that they can be heard and have their needs addressed. eitan hersch discusses elevating community member’s voices when he says that a people “can help their own neighbors move forward on some issues that they care about” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain moreau fye week eleven). although hersch talks about it within the realm of politics, this idea applies to communities and other areas too. for example, i’ve seen people help their classmates stand up for their ideas in discussions when they weren’t being given time to talk. i want to do things like that to make sure that everyone is included and heard. ● i will care deeply. from social injustice to full-on war, the world is filled with turmoil. as dean cole wrote, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed” (‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something’ by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye twelve). i cannot live a well-lived life without acknowledging that there is suffering in the world and work to address it. similar to the university’s mission, i hope that i can develop a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good” (“university of notre dame mission statement” by notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). i won’t pretend that i believe that i can bring about world peace or anything like that, but i know that i can help somehow. one way that i know i want to serve is by joining a service club on campus to help serve the south bend community. i know that i can make a difference because i care deeply. although i can’t say for certain what my well-lived life will entail, i hope that these principles will guide me as i navigate through the next three years of my life. notre dame has so much to offer and i want to make the most of the time that i have here. i look forward to what comes next and know that i will remember these memories for the rest of my life. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ greer father kevin sandberg moreau 2 29 april 2022 impact versus achievement: before time sneaks away from the beginning of the semester, we began to dive into the idea of if being a student in college is simply training for a numb, uneventful experience that is purely success driven. our first week of reading, the quote “i might be miserable, but were i not miserable, i wouldn’t be at yale” (deresieqicz), perfectly highlighted this idea for me (week 1). would i be miserable in order to stay at notre dame? in order to become a successful lawyer? in order to achieve as opposed to impact? that’s the main question that arises for me in my thoughts on the future of my life. are achievement and impact opposing ideas? often i find that the largest impacts are made by those who go against the conventional ideas of achievement and fight against the way things are. father hesburgh is an example that comes to mind when i think of impact (week 2) he went against conventional ideas of education and leadership in order to have a great impact on the lives of those around him. he was able to fight for justice and strive towards great education for many. he wanted the students at notre dame to be impactful. something that also stood out to me is that father hesburgh did not lose his joy. there is no doubt that he was a busy man and had much to stress about and work to do, but from every account i’ve seen of him he remained joyful. in the same way that father hesburgh is inspired by social change, this is something that inspires me. i shared in my week 8 integration assignment some of the injustice that i had faces within my own community in louisiana, and how i am attempting to make an impact back home. i believe that my experience within the moreau class had a great influence on me and gave me the strength and bravery to speak up to those who used to have power over me. i was no longer willing to accept the feigned expressions of peace and love. “you loved me wrong,” (greer) i wrote in my message to former staff members. this idea of inspired bravery translates perfectly to my next topic. the idea of mentorship is one that is very interesting to me. the quote “we all have a need to be seen,” (parks)(week 4). in some ways embodies how i see mentorship, but i also think that along with being seen, seeing something inspiring is necessary for mentorship. father kevin, i would describe you as a mentor, because of the way you function in life inspiring me in many ways. as mentioned before, the bravery that i have been granted in order to attempt a genuine impact in my communities is in a large part due to the messages received from moreau. you are fully aware that the “moreau” that you run is very different from the general curriculum. your genuine approach to teaching this course has left me feeling inspired and striving towards achievement not for myself but for the world that i may impact. your enjoyment of so many diverse things in life and impact on the lives of others is something that i would like to achieve. when looking to the not so distant future the three questions of is this a source of joy, does this make use of my skills, and will this serve others are essential for the idea of impact over achievement (himes)(week 3). being able to recognize how my god given skills can be applied in a way that not only helps others, but satisfies my day to day desire for joy will be a necessary skill for me to build up in order to lead a happy and fulfilling life. too often i have seen or heard stories of intelligent people who get into a career path for money or because it's the normal pipeline, and they are miserable. i do not want to discover ten years after making a decision that i had wasted ten years of my life away. time and memory have a very complicated relationship in my mind. while i am often told how much time i have and how young i am, i still feel that it is constantly slipping away far too quickly. i receive flashbacks from my phone of events that occurred two years ago and i can’t help but realize how quickly everything moves. while the pace of time is relative and very hard to comprehend as it seems that it can move both slow and fast at the same time while reflecting on the same events, the quantity of time seems less complex to me. all time is temporary and can never be returned. in only ten months i will most likely be twenty years old, which on average would be a quarter of my life. but at the same time nothing is guaranteed. i see time as something constantly hovering around zero. the idea that we should live each day like it is our last is something that has stuck with me for the past two years. my impact on earth cannot wait until i have “achieved” enough and am then able to veer off and make a change. my impact must be the change and time will not slow down in order for me to check the boxes that an achieving world has laid out for me. i desire to make people happier in my day to day life. i desire to impart wisdom and receive wisdom from those around me. i want to be a mentor and experience mentorship, because i do not believe that being a leader is ever really a one sided thing. i find that true leaders are those who interact in the most meaningful ways. too often i see the term leader being used to show those who are “greater” or “above” others. i think that the true leaders are those who realize that at the end of the day we are all at the same place. impact over achievement and people over prestige. that is the type of leader that i would like to be both during and after my experience at this university. moreau integration three the life of luke: loving, liberating, & legendary february 25, 2022 we are gathered here today to reflect, celebrate, and recall the life of , who peacefully passed away mere weeks ago. he had lived a life he was proud of, bringing joy to those around him, as was his goal from the beginning. staying involved with his passions both in and out of work, he maintained a close connection with god, constructed creations which inspired others, and fostered a new generation of builders to lead the world. to properly and appropriately remember luke and his life, it is important to reflect on each major stage with remembrance and respect. from a young age, even in his childhood years, luke was fascinated with the way things worked and their interactions with the world. he routinely built lego sets, took interest in mechanical structures, and even disassblmed household objects to see their inner workings. growing up, luke had a passion for building physical creations, and his desire to see how the world worked was a cornerstone of his personality, even from such a young age. looking at luke and seeing the curiosity in his heart, it was clear that the following quote was being realized: “‘what are the things you can’t leave alone?’ questions, concerns, issues that you return to over and over again because they fascinate you, they excite you, they really intrigue you, they lure you on, they get you to ask more and more questions. what are your obsessions?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). from a young age, luke was on route to discovering his passions and obsessions, as fr. himes described in his quote, and this seeking of joy and interest brought luke a great deal of happiness throughout his childhood. moving into his teenage and college years, luke became further enthralled with the physical and mechanical properties of the world, particularly in the field of making creations on https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832/download?download_frd=1 his own. starting with building miniature lego dioramas of his own design, luke expanded upon his love for building in the coming years leading up to college. in his favorite creation, a life-size, fully operational lego pinball machine, the first of its kind in the world, luke brought together not only a complex lego creation, but also allowed for the machine to be interacted with by the public. this bridging of the medium of the lego world from static to dynamic became a cornerstone of his personality and achievements, which would go on to guide the rest of his life. while in school, trying to balance work, social life, sports, faith, and personal hobbies, a quote which fit this timeframe was, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down in our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). luke needed to ensure all areas of his life were balanced, and take time to reflect upon his successes and failures to keep the bigger picture in mind. as he created a balanced and healthy lifestyle, he began looking into job opportunities as his college career neared an end. led by the guidance of his parents, his approach to this piece of his life can be described in the quote, “but you can only go so far with online research. eventually, you’ll need to get a first hand perspective and talk with people in career fields of greatest interest to you. you will learn so much by talking with someone in a career you are considering the good and the bad” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). as he started to meet with potential employers for a career in mechanical engineering, luke realized that his deeper purpose in life was to bring others joy in any way possible, and by harnessing his talents, such as building, to form better lives for those around him. in talking with professionals and potential employers, luke developed a better framework for his life and the direction he wanted to go as he entered the workforce and his adult life. after college, as his adult life and professional career were underway, luke took a deeper dive into the world of creation and building unique products which could enhance the https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ world around him. holding strong to his personal goals and morals, luke worked to construct a career centered around building and teaching others about roller coasters in the broader field of stem, which would help spark the passion of students. used as one of his main inspirations, luke often remembered the quote, “he followed his passion for research to cornell, where his graduate studies focused on the development of aluminum nitride (ain)-based power amplifiers, which have yielded a breakthrough in the ability to produce high-power millimeter-wave frequency signals” (“domer dozen” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 2). selecting this quote from dr. austin hickman, due to his focus on turning a passion for technology and building into a career, luke set his sights on turning his passion for creation into a successful organization. he utilized the learnings from his years of education and work experience to build a community of interested builders, which brought him–and those around him–heightened amounts of joy and satisfaction. during this time, luke also made sure to stay connected with his faith, as it had been a critical part of his life leading up to his career. even from a young age, luke was connected with the catholic church and wanted to stay involved by being a lector and volunteering his time with various organizations, and this grew to be an even larger passion outside of his direct field of work. a quote from a discussion with his grandfather from many years ago outlines, “as he described the passion with which i speak to the congregation or feel during a mass, i came to realize that my connection to the church is in fact a cornerstone of my personality, which should be further explored in the future. helping others and bringing a genuine sense of joy to those around me is a gift i often forget i possess, and would like to take more pride in and become even more involved” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week 5). expanding upon this sense of joy he brought to others within the church, luke remained connected to his faith, relationship with god, and bond with his community through his regular participation at masses and volunteer events. keeping him grounded and grateful, https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://docs.google.com/document/d/1iormbwrv51jgzfn8io3oirnxvvpeblsqevk7wujtyj0/edit?usp=sharing maintaining a connection to his parish and local area allowed for luke to feel a heightened sense of joy from meaningful communal involvement. throughout a successful career of creation, teaching others, and staying involved with his faith, luke started to become thoughtful about how his life was unfolding. he had a wonderful career, in which he took his passion for creation and used it to foster a similar passion among the younger generation, and was maintaining a high level of engagement with his local catholic community. in these times, despite his many achievements, luke started to become visibly and emotionally distressed, as he started to focus on the smaller things in his life which were not perfect. as one quote explains, “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). even among his triumphs and happiness, luke still occasionally fell into bouts of negative introspection which clouded his judgment and took his focus away from the positive aspects of his life. however, refusing to give up or be defeated, luke bounced back from these moments and came back stronger than before, determined to lead a life of meaning and purpose through his passions. luke harnessed this negative energy into a feeling of pride in his work, and aimed to live each day with purpose and joy. years went on with luke being happy and engaged with others, just as he had been doing for his entire life. continuing to craft his legacy as a builder with a focus on interactivity and inspiration, luke aimed to bring joy to others through his actions. towards the end of his life, luke grew ill and could no longer pursue this dream. as he entered medical care for the closing of his life, he still remained in high spirits and refused to give up. he still made treks to local career fairs and church events to voice his support, even when he himself was weaker than before. in these times, it was clear luke had not given up hope, as is elaborated upon in https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ the quote, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow. hope is the door that opens onto the future” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). luke knew that his time on earth was coming to an end, but he also knew that his legacy and actions could continue to inspire others for years to come. taking peace and solace in this fact, luke reflected on his lifelong portfolio of work and achievements, especially in regards to making the world a better place, and was satisfied with his life story. even as his life drew to a close, luke maintained an outlook of hope and optimism for the future. his work in areas such as building and faith involvement laid the groundwork for future generations, as the people to whom he inspired and brought joy were prepared to expand upon his life’s work. luke fulfilled his ultimate goal of bringing others joy through his own passions and experiences, and he was at peace amidst his passing. as he leaves this world, luke will be remembered as someone who always put others first, and by means of building upon his passions, created a sense of joy and inspiration among those around him. as the people around him, and even he himself, could attest, luke lived a meaningful life, one of which will be remembered for many generations to come. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration three moreau 3/4/2021 integration three a life to remember was an individual who prioritized family, friends, peers, associates, and the institutions that molded him. growing up in milton, massachusetts until the age of 11, he engaged in the typical suburban lifestyle. weekends of sports, school, and summertime pool parties. but, at the age of 12, a drastic change in his life occurred that shifted his perspective from narrow to wide; he, and his family, shifted their lives from milton, ma, to tokyo, japan. this change was not only a geographical relocation for oliver, but was at its core a change in the way he viewed the world. experiencing the societal shifts and new cultural norms, oliver grew to become a prospective and unique individual. he saw the world for a new lens, in which he openly expressed he was very thankful for. then, at the age of 15, he moved once more, to singapore. once again, he immersed himself in foreign customs, and loved every second of his experiences overseas. a lesson from moreau that parallels oliver’s overseas experiences can be seen in week 2, with the discussion question of “what inspires a life well-lived?” in his response, he used father hesburgh to mold his answer. in the hesburgh film, a prominent theme was that father hesburgh continually strived to build the community around him. like hesburgh, oliver’s overseas experience prompted him to want to build a community of socially, emotionally, and culturally aware individuals who held no bias and loved everyone for who they were (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). the lessons of community oliver learned carried over to his college search process, where surprisingly, he showed interest in notre dame. he had never visited the college nor had affiliation with it, but he loved what it stood for. so, he applied on a whim and ended up being offered the gateway program. ultimately, he found this to be the best fit for him. an important moreau lesson oliver used to deal with the stress of being a transfer student can be seen in week 1. while oliver was trying to better the community around him, like he learned from week 2, he also needed to practice mindfulness. in week 1 of moreau, he learned about how major corporations utilized study breaks and activities to better help the brains of their brightest workers (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in a high stress environment like the prestigious notre dame, oliver learned through moreau that sometimes the best way to combat stress was through self meditation and release. for oliver, his release was the gym and sports. he was a huge proponent of self-care. after college, oliver had a desire to go backpacking around the world and dedicate his time to others before he entered a corporate lifestyle. the reason he wanted to take on this https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ adventure was because of a lesson he learned from moreau week 3. during this week, oliver learned about the importance of recognizing death and being able to live in the moment and take advantage of the world around you through the article by ruth graham in the new york times ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). he spent time in europe, asia, and other areas. he realized he needed to see life’s beauties before it was too late. after spending time helping others and seeing the world, oliver struggled in finding direction for what he wanted to do with his career. it was in week 5 of moreau where he thought back to and gathered lessons he learned from a conversation with his mother. she told oliver that he works best and is most happy when he minimizes distractions around him (conversation reflection moreau fye week 5). the lessons learned in week 3 and 5 integrated in oliver’s life as he realized that he must follow his passions in his one lifetime while also getting rid of his distractions in order to maximize his productivity. so, he decided to live on his own and began working as a trainer for the boston celtics. he always grew up loving athletics and being from boston, he wanted to be apart of that community. instead of going into the corporate world, he changed his path. week 4 of moreau taught him an especially valuable lesson through the article titled “navigating your career journey” posted on notre dame’s undergraduate career services. in that article, he learned about self and career exploration figuring out what you like and what you want to do. ultimately, he decided to make the sacrifice and continued his career with an untraditional plan (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). oliver ended up retiring after 15 years of working for the organization. during that time, he met a lovely woman and had 3 kids. 2 boys, and 1 girl. oliver continued to grow as a person throughout these years, and as he reached his retirement years, he started to focus on his future more. in particular, he utilized the lessons of moreau in week 6 to practice mental health sustainability through forms of meditation and mindfulness. the video “5 minutes” helped oliver appreciate life more and learn to be happy in all situations. he knew he was blessed by the individuals around him, like his family. moreau week 6 helped oliver slow down and take time out of his day to become a more introspective person (“5 minutes" by grotto moreau fye week 6). as oliver continued to age, he developed a network of friends and family. as a grandpa, he had 9 grandchildren, all who meant the world to him. in the remaining years of his life, he spent lots of time with his family, but also began to spend more time doing charity work in order to restore equality and justice to the community around him. his lessons from moreau week 7 integrated with week 6. through his introspection and self-awareness, he continued to become a more influential member of society as the years went on. he learned how to take care of himself and transferred those lessons in treating others with respect, dignity and appreciation. the lessons from week 7, specifically pope francis’ ted talk, taught oliver the importance of solidarity and invitation of others into our lives. this is what truly made oliver happy (“why the https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ud7dpbgfbzawcomr9owqrtf9v7x6bmcq141thphb6bm/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ud7dpbgfbzawcomr9owqrtf9v7x6bmcq141thphb6bm/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). oliver ended up passing away at the age of 84. he loved his family, friends, and community. he hopes his lessons and wisdom inspire others. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript 3/1/22 integration three from birth, kevin was destined to go to notre dame. every fall since he was 5, he would tag along with his dad to his alma mater to see a football game and explore the school that would one day be his home. before arriving at notre dame though, kevin grew up in the catholic school system. at loyola academy, the jesuit value of service was instilled in him. apart from working as a paid youth sports coach, he volunteered at local after school centers. in both the sports program and the after-school centers, it was always fulfilling to see the kids he helped enjoy the same type of things he had enjoyed as a kid, whether that be playing baseball or playing board games with friends. at loyola, he learned about fr. greg boyle s.j., a jesuit priest who created a program that gave jobs to ex-convicts. growing up in a family that was deeply connected with the jesuit order, he had met many people, both priests and laypeople, who embodied the word service. however, fr. boyle always stood out to him, maybe because of his ability to connect to and serve people who were much different than him and had been cast aside from society. as fr. boyle said “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgement, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle-moreau fye week 7.) throughout high school, kevin’s favorite pastime was playing basketball. while he never played for loyola, you could find him spending his summer days outdoors (and winter days indoors) bonding with his friends over a game of pickup at the local park. when deciding on where to go to college, he was initially not set on notre dame. he thought that maybe he should try something different and get out of the midwest and the school he grew up with. however, that did not come to fruition and of course, he loved notre dame the second he arrived. just like his dad, he found a home in dillon hall and formed lifelong friendships with his new hallmates. again, he found in a common interest with his friends in playing basketball. kevin’s skill stood out from his peers on the court. he dominated section basketball and was a valuable piece of his interhall. however, he did not settle to just competing at the intramural level. he set a goal that by senior he would try and walk on to the varsity basketball team. he strived to keep getting better, always reminding himself that “[dissatisfaction is] what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing! (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes-moreau fye week 3). he applied this quote to the classroom too. in high school, he was at the top of his class, but never really felt challenged his schoolwork. college was a whole different story. he was somewhere in the middle of the class and his schoolwork was very difficult. while he didn’t struggle initially, he did find himself discouraged that he was not distinguished from his peers. however, he dedicated himself to his schoolwork, avoiding outside distractions during the weekdays and during his first semester of senior year, earned a 4.0 gpa and a spot on the basketball team. when talking about fr. ted hesburgh, fr. austin collins said “when we think about fr. ted, we cannot really talk about him and the decisions he made without talking about his faith (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week 2). this quote can also be applied to kevin’s life. at notre dame, kevin was a regular to dillon hall sunday mass and thursday “milkshake mass” where he was a lector and eucharistic minister. he also cherished his peaceful sunday night walks to the grotto where he would reflect on the week behind and anticipate the week ahead. continuing to get better and better, kevin was signed by his hometown chicago bulls as an undrafted free agent. while his stint with the bulls was not long, he earned enough money to open an after-school program in downtown chicago. through this program, he provided a safe place for children who may not have somewhere to go until later at night. here, the children were occupied with homework help, board games, sports, and anything to brighten their day and provide a “home away from home.” in college, kevin had been very busy with schoolwork, basketball, and extra curriculars that he didn’t have much time for service. he cherished his college experience but missed being able to give back to the community. he was grateful for having an active childhood that was filled with memories of him playing with his friends. being able to provide an opportunity for these children and helping to create similar memories for them was fulfilling. kevin knew that “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development.) kevin loved playing basketball and was willing to dedicate his life to it but being able to use his money that he earned through playing for service allowed him to be fully happy in his post college life. after retiring from playing, he returned to notre dame and joined their basketball coaching staff. again, passing on his knowledge of the game and recreating to the memories not just playing at notre dame, but being a student there meant the world to him. overall kevin lived a life well lived because of the sense of accomplishment he found playing basketball and in the classroom, the value of service he held close to him, and the lifelong family he at the university of notre dame mar 4, 2022 moreau integration 3 jocely’s best life lived i would first like to thank everyone for being here today in honor of jocelyn. most of you may not know me, but i was one of jocelyn’s dearest friends and i had the privilege to watch her live what i would consider, a life well-lived. i remember once, in college, she called me up from her dorm and we had a conversation for one of her classes. (moreau week 5) this conversation has stuck with me throughout the years as i have been able to watch jocelyn grow and do a lot of the things we spoke about. one thing that has stuck with me was when we talked about our passions and what we hoped to do in the future. we were both freshmen in college and had no idea if we were living the path that we were supposed to live. jocelyn asked me what her passions were and i was able to easily answer, justice. jocelyn was always an advocate for other people and i always knew that she would dedicate her life to others as she had experienced the hardships of injustice in her own life. despite having a general idea of what she hoped to accomplish in her life, i remember how much jocelyn struggled to find a major that would best correspond with what she wanted to accomplish. “there is no ‘best major’ out therebut there is a ‘best major for you’” (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family centermoreau fye week 4). this was an idea that jocelyn had to figure out during her time in college. she often worried when she saw her peers already had everything figured out. she constantly expressed uncertainty and fear of getting it wrong. despite this, i truly saw the passion that jocelyn displayed for her undergraduate major, political science. i could not see a better match made in heaven. jocelyn enjoyed her political science courses as they were geared towards this idea of justice. i think it is also important to note that “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing… indeed it's the best thing about us. it's what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions.” (“three key questions” by father michael himesmoreau fye week 3). jocelyn constantly pushed herself to find what would make her most happy. it was through this that she was ultimately able to grow into the person she was. jocelyn always knew that she would ultimately love to give back with whatever she managed to accomplish in her life. her university, which shaped a lot of who she became, had an alumni scholars initiative, “those chosen represent a truly outstanding group of young notre dame graduates who continue to make a difference in their faith, service, learning, and work, serving as inspiring role models to a rising generation of soon to be notre dame graduates.” (domer dozen by the young alumni recognition initiativemoreau fye week 2). jocelyn had always been inspired by her school’s dedication to giving back to communities having been given the ability to do so from her education at notre dame. she wanted to be a part of the notre dame alumni community that gave back. she truly wanted to be what was coined “a force for good”. and that she was. jocelyn used the opportunities given to her and accomplished all her dreams and aspirations. she went into public service and pushed for legislation that helped build justice in communities of underprivileged people, communities she had grown up in. she gave back to those communities financially and resourcefully as she donated and volunteered in her free time. jocelyn knew that “people’s paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things instead of people… tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women…” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7) people oftentimes abuse the power they have acquired through opportunities and use this power to oppress people as opposed to helping build them up. jocelyn always used the power she acquired through education with kindness. she knew that she was given these opportunities, not to abuse them, but to use them as a force for good. jocelyn did not live an easy life. her life was constantly met with obstacles she had to learn to overcome. “suffering is a part of our lives, it is always there.” (“5 minutes” from grottomoreau fye week 6) her transition into college was specifically difficult. you see, jocelyn was a huge people person. she loved being surrounded by people she cared about. but she quickly had to learn about the importance of alone time. “all the unhappiness of men, arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week 1) it was when jocelyn learned about the value of being alone that she started to appreciate herself and her worth a lot more. she no longer had to depend on others for happiness, she only had to depend on herself. this was something that she learned to apply in the future. she became a successful and happy person through this practice of reflection and self-meditation. jocelyn lived a life well lived because she lived a happy life pursuing her passions and surrounded by people she cared for and loved. her road was not an easy one, but it was a beautiful one. through all the hardships, jocelyn was able to look into the future and the bright side of things. jocelyn will be remembered by her community for her hard work and dedication. she truly cared about her community and explored this idea of justice and equality throughout her years. jocelyn left the world a better place through her presence and she will be dearly missed. her legacy will continue to inspire others around her to pursue a life well-lived. i attached the current file as a placeholder. i am currently working on refining my integration and hope to share it with you tonight. with the effort that you put into teaching it felt unfair to submit a sub par paper. i hope you have a great spring break. integration 3 eulogy (moreau fye) prof. polotto moreau fye 4 march 2022 integration 3 my eulogy a life lived in harmony. that was the philosophy anneliese strived to live by in her long, fulfilling 110 years of life. however, living “in harmony” to her didn’t always mean living in some impossible state of perfection; harmonizing, to her, was about balancing out the multiple tones in ones life to create a sound with depth, meaning, and which resonantes and transforms those who witness it. she embraced both the dissonance and consonance of life that make it interesting, and worked to harmonize herself with whatever was thrown her way. this emphasis on harmonizing with the world around her manifested in the small practices of anneliese’s everyday life. she always made it a priority to take time for herself; whether it was a weekend day dedicated solely to spending time with her family or friends, spending an evening alone in the kitchen with her thoughts and hands as she cooked, going to dance classes to fuel her lifelong love of dance and the arts, or simply taking a sunday to sit on the couch and indulge in a favorite tv show or new book, anneliese recognized the importance to take time away from the business to spend fine tuning her inner life. it is as abraham joshua heschel, the great jewish theologian, called it: “‘a cathedral in time rather than in space’; the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda, as through the light-filled passageways of notre dame” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). she used this time for physical rest, yes, but also a revitalization of her mind, emotions, and spirit; whenever feeling anything other than peace, asking herself “‘what’s going on?’; ‘what am i feeling?’; ‘what is the dialogue inside my https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ head?’; ‘what’s another way to see this situation?’ or ‘what can i do to respond better?’” (“the right way to be introspective [yes, there’s a wrong way]” by dr. tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). she passed these smaller practices of awareness on to her friends, family, and children by instruction, but she also led a life of harmony by example in her career pursuits. always interested in learning about everything, anneliese knew that she would not be satisfied doing just one thing and so made it her one thing to explore and learn new things throughout her life. she knew herself – her values, interests, personality, and skills–and used those to guide her career choices. she often told me that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” by nd undergrad career services moreau fye week 4). anneliese tried to combine this exploration of herself and her interest with her desire to help people through her work. in one reflection she wrote back in college, she said she hoped to “find ways in which we can use physics to improve the lives of others, which, upon reflection, mirrors the ways in which i wish i could change lives for the better in my own family.” (“discernment conversation reflection” by moreau fye week 5). her desire to enrich and improve the lives of the people close to her translated into her larger desire to help the larger human community. anneliese was greatly influenced by her education–being catholic, it provided her with a strong sense of her moral duty to use knowledge for the betterment of others. however, the institutions she attended–catholic or not– gave her role models whose example she carried on for further generations. the generosity and passion of her ballet teachers, the dedication and caring of her high school teachers and college professors, and the historical figures she learned of in her stories were all people from which she constantly drew inspiration for how she wanted to live her https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ life and the imprint she hoped to leave behind. i believe that she was successful in these endeavors, summed up by this quote describing one of her sources of inspiration, fr. ted hesburg: “what made him such an extraordinary figure is that he didn’t really belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind” (“hesburgh film” by kevin abbott moreau fye week 2). she strove to be “a lighthouse that stands apart, shining with the wisdom of the catholic tradition,” but also a “crossroads where differences of culture and religion and conviction can coexist with friendship civility, hospitality, and especially love.” (“hesburgh film” by kevin abbott moreau fye week 2). anneliese had a strong “understanding of reality as a place where every element connects and interacts with everything else.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7) she knew the importance of harmony between one’s personal, public, and spiritual lives, and strived to live these out in her everday life, in her career, and in her relationships with people and the wider world around her. she strived to find her place within the function of the world around her, and worked to bring harmony to her own life, to the lives of others, and to everything she touched. most of all, however, she lived a life of symphonic, harmonious joy. she truly embodied the statement that “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied. it is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you–to a new decision and to a new way of living” (“three key questions” adapted from fr. micheal himes moreau fye week 3). she has accomplished much and impacted many, but above all, she is so deeply loved by the family and friends who keep her spirit alive. a life so full of color, of liveliness, of art, music, dance, song, and love cannot help but leave behind beautiful echos of its sound, like the moments between the finale https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/472856?module_item_id=146947 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/472856?module_item_id=146947 and applause. so let us applause and celebrate the life of anneliese, a life which truly was one of harmonious joy. mary grace walsh, of richmond, va and south bend, in, died on thursday after a long life. born august 21, 2003, mary grace was the oldest of six children. she was always very close to her siblings and was a constant source of laughs or a shoulder to cry on. she grew up in richmond, va, where she never met a stranger. every person mary grace met was a friend, and she was very in tune with people’s emotions and cared very deeply to make sure everyone was okay. a highly empathetic person, she was always there for those who needed her. those she loved never doubted her love for them, as she expressed it in both words and actions (“chapter 8: jurisdiction,” from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle, moreau fye week 7, on canvas). a confident public speaker and excellent student, she graduated from james river high school’s leadership program in 2021. her time at james river was cut short because of the covid-19 pandemic, but she intentionally maintained her relationships and was an anchor for both students and teachers in the tenuous time of the pandemic. after graduating, she pursued an undergraduate degree in theology and sociology at university of notre dame. during college, she fully lived out her vocation as a college student, dedicating herself to her school work, service in the south bend community, and her friendships (meruelo career center, moreau fye week 4). although college wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows, she made time to care for those around her and ensure that they were happy at school. an advocate for mental health, mary grace saw a therapist and took antidepressants, constantly advocating for people to do what they needed to to be healthy and happy. after graduating from notre dame with honors, nothing put her heart at rest, but she followed the restlessness and took the next right step, following god’s lead to pursue a masters in divinity, followed by a degree in art counseling (“three key questions,” father michael himes, moreau fye week 3). this decision was inspired by the example of many of her excellent professors, including anthony pagliarini and mike hebbeler. her choice to become an art counselor was inspired by her love for art of all kinds and her belief in the healing power of both art and jesus. however, after getting two more degrees she realized that constantly studying wasn’t where god was calling her: she was being called to religious life. she then entered the congregation of the holy family of nazareth, where she explored many different career paths. she finally landed on art therapy for children struggling with rare diseases, following the example she set for herself in her senior year of high school. her patients loved seeing her, and she always helped more than the people she treated, because her love rippled outward through the community. she was content to just help one person, but at the end of her life art therapy became a nationally recognized and globally acclaimed program (“hesburgh,” quote from mary berry, moreau fye week 2). even though mary grace struggled with never feeling like she was doing enough, she relied on her family and friends to ground her and remind her of the work she was doing, and also that she was far more than the work she did. always seeking to help others, mary grace realized that she couldn’t do so without taking care of herself (conversation with her cousin emma, moreau fye week 5). this involved not only consistent therapy, art, sometimes medication, and time with friends, but also growing in self-knowledge. through prayer and recreation, mary grace took time to slow down and reflect on what meant most in life and who she was (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico iyer, moreau fye week 1). once she worked on herself, she always helped others realize how to grow in themselves too. she had an excellent balance of work, play, and prayer, and was very intentional with her time (“5 minutes,” aria swarr, moreau fye week 6). she loved bubbles, birthdays, hosting huge parties for all her friends, creating art, going on bike rides in the spring, the first snowfall, swimming in lakes, going on adventures, train rides, traveling internationally, celebrating her friends, and taking care of little kids and babies. she appreciated the small and large joys in life, like snuggling a new born baby, a drink from starbucks, and a beautiful piece of art. in her last weeks of life, she thought a lot about how she wanted to be remembered in this world, and there was a quote that resonated with her from the musical hamilton, one of many musicals she enjoyed: “legacy. what is a legacy? it’s planting seeds in a garden you never get to see.” while the seeds mary grace planted will flower and bear fruit for decades to come, she also had the privilege of seeing many of the fruits of her love and legacy. for example, her cousin kaelin knows that she is beloved and wanted in the catholic church, especially important because she is queer. she knows she is beloved by god and by her family and friends because of the seeds mary grace planted. dozens of young kids with medical complexities have experienced art and connection in the time of the covid pandemic because of mary grace’s work and love. she put so much time into showing people that they were loved, and it paid off not only in her lifetime, but will pay off in the future as well. what she hopes you learned from her life and eulogy is that you should cherish the small things in life, but that it’s okay if you find it hard sometimes. it all will work out in the end, as long as you have faith in yourself, trust the people around you to support and love you, and invest in your relationship with god. what her life shows is that it’s okay not to know what to do or what comes next in your life, as long as you take the next step forward, laugh always, cry when you have to, and hug your friends. even though she wasn’t perfect, that is what made her the person she is today, and that is someone she was proud of up until the last moment and hopes you can be proud of too. integration 3 aristotle says that an unexamined life is not worth living. while this saying has been used so much that it nears becoming a platitude, it holds true: if we do not think about the point of our life and the directions it is going, and the choices we make, then we cannot have meaning in our lives. i try to ask myself this very question every day. in my life, i hope to be able to do what is right, to grow and learn so that i find myself in a place and state that i ought to be in. if i live this way, i can be content to die knowing i have lived well. “and the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them.” this quote from week one illustrates the great struggle of the modern era. instead of thinking about why we do things, or how we do them, or seek the good, we often are more concerned with the what of things. although seeking to learn facts about any topic is generally a noble pursuit, if we prioritize this over a sense of framework and a sense of our proper place within the cosmos, we will become overwhelmed and led astray. unless we have a solid perspective from which to view and process facts, we will be lost among them, and life will become too complex and confusing. “those chosen represent a truly outstanding group of young notre dame graduates who continue to make a difference in their faith, service, learning, and work, serving as inspiring role models to a rising generation of soon-to-be notre dame graduates.” this quote is from the explanation of who is awarded the domer dozen honor. this stuck with me because coming into notre dame, i was told of fr. sorin’s vision, that notre dame would be a great force for good in the world. in this description of the honorees, and by looking at what they did, i am inspired to be like them, to go out in the world and do good in it, in whatever area i am called to. the second half of the quote directly addresses this, saying that the purpose of the dozen is to inspire undergraduates. i think it certainly does, as it provides concrete examples of good in the world. when we see the achievements and accomplishments of those of others, in both the past and present, we are inspired to be like them. as a child i used to watch great sports players do phenomenal things on the television screen and i would go in the backyards afterward and try to imitate them. they inspired me by their great feats to be like them. similarly, when i read of great warriors or generals from history i would desire to gain their fighting prowess or their tactical acumen. in both these instances, it was the example of others that inspired me to better myself, and live a great life. “is this a source of joy?” this question from fr. himes’s questions stood out to me because if something you you are spending your life doing is not a source of joy to you, then something is wrong. the problem lies either in you or the thing you are doing. if the thing you are doing is not something you are meant to do, you will naturally not enjoy it, as you are not fulfilling your purpose. another problem could be how you are going about what you are doing. if you change your attitude towards what you are doing can also decide on what brings you joy. when making important life changing decisions, it is important to consider what you value and what you are called to be. without knowing what is important to you, you cannot make any kind of informed decision about your life or go in a direction worth going. further, if you do not understand the place you ought to be in in the universe then you cannot find happiness and contentment. you must seek to find what god calls you to, and constantly ask yourself if you are where you ought to be. asking these questions will help you to live a good life. “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order.” this quote stood out to me because some people think or act like in your life things will go very smoothly and your next steps will always be very clear. this way of thinking is not wise in my opinion, because the future is not within our control or knowledge. we never know what may happen, or how we may change as life goes on. the idea that your future will be stable and predictable is a flawed one, as we can never predict changing variables. it is important to be open for options and opportunities, and to be versatile in pursuit of truth. to live a good life, you must be seeking to find fulfillment and good. you must seek to find the place you ought to be in. also you must prepare yourself to die well. if you die and you are not ready, and you do not die well, your life is not brought to completion in a good way. you must live your life in a way which you ought, finding your place in the universe and operating within it. fulfillment is found when you seek the good and seek to better yourself and help those around you better themselves. for the week 5 assignment, i talked to a friend from my highschool. i had gone to a new highschool my senior year, and he was someone i was able to quickly make a deep connection with. when i asked him what he thought i valued and desired and life the answer came fairly quickly. he said it was pretty clear that i cared about my family, about my friends, about my faith, about god, about my studies, and of course, about soccer. he also said one thing he really liked about me is that if i cared about something i would really throw myself into the thick of it. when i asked him when he had seen me “in the zone” he said that sometimes he could kind of see it just at certain times when i would entertain the class with various tomfoolery, and especially saw it when i played soccer. when i asked him what i wanted to change in the world, we had a sort of sidebar about poetry. both of us write it occasionally, and both of us believe that art in general is very much capable of changing the world. also in general we talked about how fighting the good fight in the community you are in every day was very important. when i asked him the final question, what something that would be hard for me to hear was, he said that i was very skinny, and we laughed together. these things, though, all joking aside, were things for which i want to be remembered. “this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” this quote from the tasha eurich article really stuck with me because it latches on to an idea we have really lost sight of in our modern world, and that is crucial to living a good life. as the article pointed out, when practicing self reflection, many were more focused on thinking about themselves than getting to know ourselves. self knowledge is the definition of humility. this quote helps us see why.when we merely think about ourselves, we can obsess over ourselves, making ourselves the center of our view and leading to our perception being led astray. instead we must acknowledge that we do not know everything about ourselves, and seek to learn, and seek to uncover truth, rather than assigning characteristics. the thing that immediately comes to my mind in response to this question is the example of papers, since i have to deal with them right now, as a college student. papers are a hardship, they take effort and work to complete. they become worthwhile and useful, however when approached the right way. they could stop me from living well by making me sad and stressing me out to the point where i cannot enjoy my life and influencing my outlook entirely, or they could help me by my use of them to grow and to reach achievement. hardship will always exist in life, and it is important to be prepared for it and go into it trusting that god has put it there so that you may grow, and not as some crushing force. i hope to come through it, and be remembered as having pushed through and overcame hardship. ““we are the guys who hate those guys” is the self defining assertion of every gang.’ regardless of how true this is about gangs, this quote from the week seven readings brings up an important element about human nature. when we define ourselves by others, for example, those with whom we struggle and contend, there is no room for growth and progress. our end is then not constructive but destructive, instead of trying to preserve something or expand or build something, we rather oppose everything someone else is doing and seek to destroy it. by concerning ourselves with someone else’s growth, we neglect our own, and so cannot move forward. besides closing each other off from helping each other, this focus hurts one’s own outlook and position. relationships with others should be good in order to achieve a life well lived. part of the measure of how you live is how you interact and impact other people. therefore it is important to build good relationships and impact the people in those relationships well. many people who are considered to have lived good lives leave great marks on those around them. they all have stories about how their encounters with them were on some sort of different level, some out of the ordinary impact that they had on them. as iron sharpens iron, good people help other good people become better. i hope to be remembered for all the qualities i have expounded in this paper.i want to live the good life, to live a well ordered, good and virtuous life, both for its own sake and to help others. theo helm moreau fye 10102 march 4, 2022 living up to, and beyond, a name farida (arabic: ة���� ) —feminine adjective of middle eastern origin; translates to unique in arabic, and precious pearl in indonesia and southeast asia. it was as though she had chosen her name herself, as traces of her name’s definition were weaved through events and decisions she made since the day she could walk. in fact, her life is the physical embodiment of the word farida . raised by a single mom in a tumultuous corner of cairo, egypt, she grew up with the arab spring and egyptian revolution occurring right outside her window. experiencing historic events from a young age led her to daydream a career in politics and global affairs; at the ripe old age of six, flaws in the justice system were made crystal clear to her. her version of playing with toys resembled something like picking up a fork and a spoon (the spikes in the fork resembled president morsi’s messy hair, she thought) and simplifying the political situation to her younger brother, omar. her version of watching tv was anxiously keeping up with day to day news and ignoring the instinctive urge to look away from graphic scenes. with a childhood marked by the awareness that her apartment building could be bombed at any moment, she couldn’t help but ponder her mortality (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). at that moment, she refused to leave this world without rectifying said injustices in some way. “i want to become a news reporter! or… a lawyer! i also want to help immigrants seek refuge!” (“domer dozen” by notre dame alumni association moreau fye week two). her ambition gave her something to look forward to even when she persisted through dark times, both literally and figuratively (her access to stable electricity was, let’s just say, rare. some of her brother’s fondest memories include him making up songs with her on the kitchen floor while waiting for the light to come back on). although farida’s upbringing forced her to grow up rather prematurely, her circumstances are ultimately what helped shape the person she became as an adult. during her undergraduate years at the university of notre dame, in the early 2020s, her college friends recall complaining about the residential conditions, which they thought were less than ideal. according to her randomly assigned first-year roommate ella maria, farida always tried to stay optimistic and point out how fortunate they were to attend such a prestigious university in the first place, and how access to stable access to electricity and water is a blessing most students tend to overlook. given the fact that she had grown up in an environment where she could not afford to think about more than the necessities, her attitude was marked by a sense of deep gratitude. her children hold onto her journal, in which she wrote down three wins each day, and continue this tradition to commemorate her dedication to mindfulness and giving thanks (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week 6). all of farida’s friends can attest to the fact that she was also leaping outside of her comfort zone (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5), regardless of how uncomfortable the experience would be—competing on the national tennis team in egypt, no cursing for a full year in 7th grade (succeeded for 11 months and two weeks), speaking six languages and continuing to learn more, working alongside greta thunberg’s colleagues and organizing events surrounding environmental racism, having her work be featured on teen vogue british vogue, and becoming a part-time translator to make climate information more accessible to non-english speakers all by age 18… the list goes on and on. later in her adulthood, she accomplished her dream of becoming a neuroscience researcher in dublin, ireland. her published studies on the neurobiology of language acquisition, as well as her contributions to the field of trauma-informed developmental psychology and abnormal psychopathology, are of great value and are now being implemented in schools and in london’s elijah social cognitive skills centre (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” activity by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). although all the women in her family were encouraged to simply get a bachelor’s degree, get married, abandon their careers and live a simple at-home life, farida refused to live such a life. she asked herself, why would you settle for the bare minimum if you are capable of so much more? (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” activity by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). at her core, farida lived with a philosophy that merges values and traditions from buddhist spirituality and islam. her upbringing in a devout muslim household instilled deep faith in her; surrendenering to the natural flow of life became second nature to her (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). being a kind, respectful, and compassionate individual to all was what she embodied, and was the reason why she was adamant about advocating for people of color who are disproportionately affected by the climate crisis (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). people discouraged her from moving to a different country, from pursuing a degree in the sciences, from having different beliefs than her family, from devoting energy to advocating for environmental justice, and for having her own way of living that may be perceived as unconventional for some. what was most important to her, though, was utilizing her experiences to make others’ lives better than hers, so external criticism did not get in the way of achieving her vision. as long as she was armed with determination in one hand and compassion in the other, she could overcome obstacles in her way, practice love as an act of resistance and work towards a more just future. this, to her, is a life well-lived. a life well-lived through boethius and heidegger throughout this semester, moreau has challenged me to think of what constitutes a life well-lived. however, i have found that some of the most substantive contributions to my ideas of a life well-lived have come from my philosophy class. these contributions specifically stem from readings of the consolation of philosophy by boethius and the question concerning technology by martin heidegger. through reading boethius, i have come to understand what i believe to be the key to pursuing a life well-lived. while heidegger has opened me to the ever-pressing threats i face in my pursuit of a life well-lived. in week three, father michael himes presented us with “three key questions” to ask during our career discernment process. father michael’s first question was, “is this a source of joy?” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). this question is directly related to the writings of boethius. boethius wrote the consolation of philosophy in prison while awaiting his wrongful execution. at first, he laments over his turn of fortune. boethius had long been an incredibly fortunate and successful man. yet with no wrongdoing of his own, boethius lost this fortune and was sentenced to death for treason he did not commit. while boethius awaited his death, theodoric the great, the ostrogothic king who betrayed boethius, sat atop great riches and power. how could a good man like boethius find himself in such a situation while wicked men like theodoric prosper? the key to a life well-lived lies within boethius’s answer to this question. boethius’s destructive turn of fortune does not define whether or not his life was well-lived, nor did the good fortune he experienced earlier. similarly, the great fortune of theodoric does not define his life as well-lived. fortune, and the accompanying suffering and joy, are not what defines a life well-lived. fortune is ultimately out of our control, and similarly to boethius, we are all vulnerable to fall victim to fortune’s changing tides. something as volatile as fortune could certainly not be the key to a life well-lived. the key to a life well-lived is not fortune and its riches, but rather, it is the pursuit of true happiness. such a conclusion is seemingly obvious; of course achieving true happiness will lead to a life well-lived. however, for boethius, the issue's complexity lies not in striving for true happiness but rather in identifying true happiness. we mistake parts of true happiness for the whole. for example, we often believe that pursuing riches, power, or family will bring us true happiness and a well-lived life. this idea is reinforced by week four of the moreau curriculum. “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (navigating your career journey by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). in our career discernment process, if we only focus on one aspect as opposed to the whole, we will ultimately find ourselves unfulfilled. riches, power, and family will not bring about true happiness or a truly well-lived life. these are just parts of the whole, they are aspects of true happiness. by focusing solely on the part, we grow blind to the whole and ultimately choose not to see it, settling for our partial happiness. the first step in achieving a life well-lived is identifying true happiness. identifying true happiness and pursuing the whole will ultimately bring together all of the parts. boethius recognized true happiness as god, a conclusion which i have come to agree with. by pursuing a healthy relationship with god, humans can achieve their ultimate goal of true happiness, bringing about a life well-lived. through the question concerning technology, heidegger presents the many threats to our pursuit of a life well-lived. despite being written in 1954, the question concerning technology is incredibly relevant today, especially when considering our pursuits of a life well-lived. where francis bacon took an optimistic outlook on technology, heidegger took the opposite view. bacon’s the new atlantis was written to depict a perfect society, driven by his ideas of technology. while bacon may have viewed solomon’s house as a perfect societal helmsman, his faith in technology was misguided. when viewed through the lens of modern technology, a secretive guiding society such as solomon’s house is instead seen as dystopian and untrustworthy. heidegger’s view of modern technology was far more pessimistic than bacon’s and is far more accurate. heidegger viewed modern technology with great skepticism. older technologies worked with nature in a poiesis, helping to reveal the being of something. there is a certain beauty to such a technology, a beauty that is lost in modern technology. as opposed to working along with nature, modern technology “enframes,” it challenges and forces nature to reveal, constraining it to “standing reserve.” in my opinion, enframing and the standing reserve are the two greatest obstacles we face on our path towards a life well-lived, and modern technologies, which we all use almost every day, perpetuate this obstacle. the ultimate threat of enframing is when we begin to see each other as standing reserve, and unfortunately, this has already come to be. we are drawing away from solidarity and “our relationship with the other” and are instead finding ways in which we can use each other to our advantage. we are no longer advancing “through the practice of accompaniment” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). instead, we are regressing through the practice of enframing. in week one, we read about companies in silicon valley enacting a weekly “internet sabbath” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). while they may not characterize the threats of technology as enframing and standing reserve, these companies recognize the dangers of their technology. however, while their employees enjoy internet sabbaths, the rest of us are trapped, handicapped by our devices, and seemingly doomed to be standing reserve. these companies have achieved one of the greatest threats identified by heidegger, the turning of humans themselves into standing reserve. we are merely numbers, tools used to drive the profits of these companies. modern technology has turned the average human being into a standing reserve, and the only way to achieve true happiness and a truly well-lived life is to escape this enframing. we must also address the enframing we may act upon others. for example, when dean g. marcus cole wrote, “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles,” he did so intending for us to genuinely grow (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). not for us to create façade friendships solely designed to help us. when i first read heidegger, i felt hopeless. i already am a standing reserve, and these technologies are essential to my life. i would not be able to lead my life as i currently do without these technologies. i felt trapped. as i continually thought of heidegger, technology, and enframing, i concluded that the solution to the standing reserve is not to live like a hermit in the woods. while i may not be able to free myself from being standing reserve, i can try to avoid personal enframement. the most i can do is not treat others or nature as standing reserve. trying our best to avoid enframement on the personal level is our only escape from this great obstacle. pope francis said, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). we can only pursue boethius’s true happiness through harmony with those around us, and such a harmony cannot be achieved if we trap ourselves in enframement, turning possible harmony into standing reserve. a life well-lived can only be achieved by acknowledging the whole of true happiness as god and the avoidance of enframing and the standing reserve. moreau fye s2 integration iv the mission of by when writing my personal mission statement for the week 13 prompt, i looked back and thought to myself how i could make this statement as meaningful but simple as possible. i understand that many of my classmates decided to go along with a longer statement than i did—after all, this is what the moreau model suggested. however, i figured that the mission statements of many of the most successful companies were very simple yet so meaningful, so why can’t mine be the same? after about half an hour of deliberation, i decided on this paragraph: “my name is sebastian and i am a product of my actions and my experiences. i will live the precious life i have been given to its fullest potential. i will meet new people from around the world, learn from them, and understand them. i will treat them with kindness and respect, always acting for the common good while not forgetting myself. i will forever keep god in my heart as my guide while i discover the beauty of what life has to o�er. i am a learner, i am a friend, i am an explorer, i am a son, and i am a servant of god.” i believe that this statement is simple enough to understand, but complex enough to carry immense meaning. every sentence of this statement can be broken down into some experience, some goal, and some value that i hold on the most basic level. i will be recounting these experiences, goals, and values as i give a rundown of this mission statement, exploring the inner workings of who i am as a person, along with the basic fabric of what defines me as a person. without further ado, let’s break down sebastian. on the most basic level of my person, i am built upon a foundation of accountability. i have learned, throughout my academic career, di�erent methods of holding myself to the highest standards in all aspects of my life. while this is very important to me, i have learned how to balance this with a certain level of self care during college. the biggest “i-really-need-to-starttaking-care-of-myself” moment for me came in the november of fall semester. i became very sick with the flu during the middle of the month, but decided my well-being was not worth missing a couple of classes to recover. i also wanted to attend a special event dinner in the oak room above south dining hall that i was invited to through a seminar class, and i was not going to give up the opportunity to escape dining hall food for an evening, so i attended. i ended the evening by leaving the dinner early and throwing-up all of the fancy chicken i ate, which was disappointing to say the least. what followed was the worst night of sleep i’ve ever had. i woke up severely dehydrated, and ended up walking into the dillon common-room and passing out on the floor with no one around. i woke up, called an ambulance for myself, and went to the hospital. i ended up losing seven pounds that semester (at least i didn’t gain the freshman 15, right?) this is when i figured i should probably start taking better care of myself, which i have since then. another key lesson that i try to incorporate into my life is constantly reminding myself that life is precious and deserves to be appreciated at all moments. i feel so blessed that i have been given the opportunity to live the life that i live, and i am constantly reminded of that fact here at notre dame. many seniors and graduates have reminded me that this experience goes by extremely quickly, so i should embrace everything this university has to o�er while i am here. i take this advice to heart, and oftentimes have a hard time saying no to di�erent events or opportunities on campus. for example, my participation in the fisher regatta was totally last-minute. when the sign-up for dillon was sent to my email, i had zero interest in doing it. however, there was that little voice in the back of my mind that told me i was going to regret not participating in this amazing tradition, so i made it happen. it turned out to be one of the best experiences i’ve had as a student on this campus so far, even though i did get a little bit wet after the spine of our barrel and pallet crafted boat snapped in the water. another key accomplishment that i want to continue to embrace during my time here is meeting people from around the world who can teach me their perspectives on life. growing up, i watched a lot of anthony bourdain with my parents and was inspired by the way he was able to connect with and embrace di�erent cultures so easily. i found myself wanting to be like bourdain when i got older—able to explore the world with confidence and a curious attitude (minus the drug addiction.) i’ve tried my best to embrace things during my time at notre dame. i’ll be studying abroad in jerusalem this summer, but beyond this, i try to meet new people from new places every single day. some of my best friends here are from places i would not have even thought of: palestine, the philippines, chicago, new york, rhode island, florida, texas. the list goes on and on and on. all of these di�erent friends i made have contributed to me and my knowledge of the world in some form. i have grown to be a more understanding and compassionate person, and i cannot thank them enough for that. the final section of my mission statement i would like to touch on is my commitment to treating others with kindness and respect for the sake of the common good. it is important to me to embody the catholic value of charity while at notre dame and throughout my life. embracing notre dame’s perspective on inclusivity, i am committed to respecting all people from all walks of life. (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame by und) in my future career, i want to be able to serve those less fortunate than myself. through moreau, i have been able to realize the importance of this and discern how i can actually serve this purpose in my life. it is my dream to work in the business of mlb operations, so i decided to take the center for social concerns class on sports and social change to better understand how i can promote justice in my future career. i hope to continue to embody these principles in my everyday interactions with other people. my personal mission statement is very significant to me. it defines and outlines who i am as a person, embodying the key aspects of what makes me unique and good. it is my hope that i will be able to look back at this statement, adjust it to fit myself throughout the years, and use it to cement myself in my beliefs. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ fye2 integration three scanlon 1 moreau first year experience two reaume march 3, 2022 a death well-died brother, son, friend: of all the things that michael was, he enjoyed being these the most. he was always there to pick you up when you needed it most. his life was never easy, and included many bumps along the way, but he worked for every opportunity he got, and always saw the good in everything and everyone. he was always special. as a child he was smart, athletic, and kind, even though he showed his kindness by shooting nerf guns at his sisters. but we all knew that something changed in him on august 17, 2011. at 8 years old, michael dislocated and fractured his hip, underwent two surgeries, seven mris, countless x-rays and examinations. he was operated on by the world’s most renowned orthopedic trauma surgeon, dr. david helfet, after a series of events that could only be described as the grace of god. he could not walk for 6 weeks, and could not play the sports he loved so much for 5 months, but he never lost faith; no, not him. while we all worried about the function of his left leg, he was just as you’d expect: full of hope, and appearing as if nothing was wrong. that’s who he was: no matter how dire the circumstances may have seemed, he always found a way to exude confidence, and his demeanor would assure you that everything would be just fine. from that moment on, michael began to live life in the present, never taking anything for granted. it was as if he was “standing two inches away from a huge canvas [that was] noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond” and then by stepping farther back and standing still that [he began] to see what that canvas (which [was his] life) really [meant], and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye2 week one). he began to never take anyone or anything for granted, because he learned just how quickly it can all be taken away, a lesson that we have now learned too. it became clear to me from that moment on that he was motivated by challenges. he loved to defy the odds and prove that he could do whatever he put his mind to (discernment conversation with my dad moreau fye2 week 5). for example, he did not let his physical setback stop him from pursuing his athletic passions. in fact, it allowed him to focus on the one sport that he truly loved: baseball. he was a gifted athlete, and showed promise in baseball from the moment he held a bat. his athletic career culminated in winning the new jersey state title in 2019, and hitting .350 over the entire course of his high school baseball career. he received offers from johns hopkins university and tufts university to play baseball, but turned them down to pursue what he knew held the most potential for him: an academic career at the university of notre dame. he was drawn to notre dame due to its eternal pursuit “to balance faith and academics” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye2 week two). michael always prioritized the right things. he always https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143021 scanlon 2 thought that right after the people he loved, came god and education. to him, notre dame offered the greatest opportunities to learn how to live a good life, rooted in god. he attributes his learning to love himself to his time at notre dame. what some of you may not know is that in previous years, his thoughts would “cloud [his] self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye2 week six). however, his struggles with his body image and mental health led him to become an advocate for the destigmatization of men’s mental health, focusing on the perception that men cannot show emotions. he became more open to sharing his thoughts, and loved deeper than ever before. in fact, he began to learn the true meaning of love. in the past, he admitted that what he thought was love was not so at all. the love he gave and received was conditional: a product of a give-and-take relationship between himself and another. however, throughout high school and his time at notre dame, through the relationships he developed, he learned how to love unconditionally. while those relationships did make his life easier, “there were times when the futility and irrationality of the gang mind-set threw [him] into this frustrated place… sometimes, [he] just [couldn’t] think of much else to do but shake [his] fist and get red in the face” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle, sj moreau fye2 week seven). however, he would never let this frustration show. he loved no matter what, and his heart never lacked room for one more person. “there’s nothing more devastating than being an unrequited lover—one who extends himself or herself for others and is not appreciated. we have to be willing to hear what others need and to give ourselves in response even when our attempt to respond may not be appreciated” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye2 week three). if only michael was here today, i could have told him how much his love was appreciated, but we all know that he knew. he always knew. when something was wrong, he knew. when you were happy or proud of something but didn’t want to let it on, he knew. and when you cared about him, whether you told him or not, he knew. as his father, i was always asked the question, “what does michael do best?”, and to me it was that once he decided on something, he never gave up ("exploring a life well-lived career development reflection" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye2 week four). not just in academic or athletic pursuits, but people too. once he decided to love you, he was never going to stop. no matter what you did to him, no matter how much or how often you hurt him, he was never going to stop being there for you. his smile was infectious, and he will be missed. his memory will not die, and he will live on as long as those whom he loves keep his memory. word count: 1079 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143141 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143141 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/167949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143051 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 gonyea integration three gonyea 1 erik oswald fys 10102 64 04 march 2022 the unexpectedly remarkable life of a girl from new jersey today we commemorate and celebrate the life of , a loving mother, wife, daughter, and colleague. riley lived an extraordinary, joy-filled life each and every day. when she walked into a room, there was never a dull face left. during her ninety-five years, she made wonderful, lasting friendships, married her other half, and with him raised spectacular children. she completed all of this while having a successful career as a businesswoman. riley put the totality of her heart into all of these relationships, inspiring all of those around her. if one thing can be said about riley’s life, it was well-lived. but what made it so well-lived? throughout her years, she lived by the words of others, those who inspired her. outlined below are some of the core notions that riley kept in mind and lived by until her dying day, most of which originated during her freshman year moreau class at the university of notre dame. as everyone who knew riley is aware of, she was a very busy woman. when she first began her four years at notre dame, she doubted that she could handle all of the work being thrown at her. one memory in particular was prominent in her mind. during her first finals week in december 2021, riley had three exams in one day. she was very stressed out and spent the three days prior to the exams in isolation, studying at all waking hours. the night before, however, riley thought of a quote written by pico iyer in his ted article that focused on the reasons people should occasionally slow down and rest. he said “[y]et it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). with this in mind, riley stopped her studying for an hour and gave herself a break. she went to the smith center and exercised https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ gonyea 2 with her friends. not only was this a rewarding experience, but it alleviated her stress even if just for the hour. from that day forward, riley decided that she was going to put a greater effort into giving herself breaks from time to time. she proceeded to fulfill this goal all throughout her college career, using the gym as an outlet for when she needed a break from academics. another skill that led to riley’s life well-lived was communication. in middle and high school, riley, and those around her, would always label her as shy. as you are all aware of, once you got to know her, riley was far from shy, but it took her some time to warm up to others. due to this trait, sometimes her communication skills were not as sharp as she wanted them to be. when she arrived at notre dame, riley realized that in order to make friends, she must be able to get out of her comfort zone and talk with strangers she was not the most comfortable around. this was a goal she had set for herself prior to arriving in south bend. riley was successful in achieving this goal and was reminded of it by father hesburgh. in his documentary, father hesburgh claimed that “peace is important, that human life is important and sacred, that we have to learn to talk to each other” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fys week 2). this quote not only reminded riley of her achieved goal, but also further inspired her. in this quote, father hesburgh was not simply emphasizing communication, but was also encouraging uncomfortable discussions in which two people do not see eye to eye. with this in mind, riley set a new goal. she strived to become comfortable with discomfort when in conversations with people who disagreed with her. further, rather than immediately closing herself off to different perspectives, she decided to work towards understanding the viewpoints of others. riley was very lucky. she was blessed to not have had to go through too many hardships in her life. for those few that she did face, however, she always tried to find a light in them. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 gonyea 3 during her second semester of her freshman year of college, riley was in an applied linear algebra course. she despised that class. the material was very difficult, she did not like her professor’s teaching style, and she overall felt like she lacked all background knowledge needed for the class. riley would push off her assignments and procrastinate studying for her exams in the course. sister aletheia, however, brought to her attention that “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fys week 3). now, this example is very slight in regard to the topic of death that sister aletheia was referencing, however riley still felt her experience applied to that quote. from it, riley set a goal for herself. rather than avoiding them, she would face her tragedies head on, leaning into family and friends and always remembering to find the light in the darkness. if she were here, i am sure she would want all of her loved ones to do the same at this tragic time. when riley began college, she had no idea what she wanted to do in the future. this may be surprising due the successful career she had, but it is true. the only thing riley knew when she started her first ever college course was that she was going to be a finance major. what did this even mean? she had no idea. oftentimes riley would be asked what she wanted to do after she graduated and everytime she responded “something in finance”. truthfully, she had no idea what this even meant. after reading an article by the meruelo family center for career development, riley realized she was containing herself to one specific path due to her major. the ccd however, switched her mindset, informing her that a specific major does not equal a specific career path (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fys week 4). after this encounter, riley became more open to all career https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ gonyea 4 possibilities, not just those labeled finance. all throughout college she worked to improve this quality. due to her growth, riley was able to have the successful career she did. riley cherished her relationship with her parents. she loved them dearly and felt comfortable sharing anything with them. in college, riley had many enlightening conversations with both of her parents, but particularly her mother, jen. her mother knew her better than anyone else, and riley was aware of this. because of this, riley put a heavy weight on her mom’s opinions and observations about her. in one conversation, her mother emphasized how riley has always been her own toughest critic (“conversation with mom, february 05, 2022, week 5”). this was something riley had been aware of, but it meant a lot coming from her mom. after that conversation, riley decided she was going to work on being kinder to herself, and lessen the pressure she put on herself. she practiced this skill throughout her entire life, working everyday to improve it. as an athlete, riley was told throughout her entire childhood to move on from the past. in sports games, having a short term memory was extremely beneficial. riley, however, never really thought that skill also applied to life in general. after reading a ted article by tasha eurich, however, it was brought to riley’s attention just how vital this skill is. in this article, it was mentioned that asking why something happened causes a person to get stuck on an occurrence rather than healthily moving on from it (“the right way to be introspective (yes,there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fys week 6). this statement caused riley to reflect on her previous experiences she had gotten hung up on. for example, in her marketing class, riley had stumbled on her words during a presentation to the entire class. she got caught up in that minor mistake and it became the only aspect of her presentation that she remembered. rather than replaying moments like this in her head, wondering why they occurred, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ gonyea 5 riley decided to quickly move on from minor trip-ups. she did this using tasha eurich’s advice and refraining from questioning why something occurred and rather asking the “what” question. the last great, and most important, element of riley’s life was happiness. there were an uncountable number of things that brought riley joy on the daily. she was surrounded by people who she adored and people who adored her. she loved her work and was the proudest mother out there. this happiness, however, was not so apparent at all times. for example, in her freshman year university seminar that focused on current events, she had a classmate whose viewpoints she completely disagreed with. at first, his comments during class brought her rage. how could she ever get along with someone whose perspective on issues was so different from her own? she got minimal happiness from this class due to this classmate. later on in the year, riley read a ted article written by pope francis. in it, he stated that “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fys week 7). when reflecting on this quote, riley realized that it was up to her whether or not she could attain happiness in any situation. she got to decide whether there was harmony between herself and all other moving parts of her life. she began to practice this habit, nearly mastered it, and continued to live by it up until her dying day. lived a spectacular life guided by principles she picked up along the way. she practiced these principles each and every day, coming closer and closer to mastering them and reaping their complete and total benefits. riley’s life brings inspiration to us all, and we should all strive to leave this earth with even just a fraction of the well-lived life that riley exposed us to. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration #3 natalia soto eulogy.docx march 4th, 2020 moreau fye integration three the life of today, we get together to celebrate the life of our beloved . all of us have known natalia in different ways: as a caring mother, friend, wife, daughter, and the list goes on. personally, i had the privilege of knowing natalia as a friend, my best friend. today, words cannot express the grief i feel at her loss. natalia was the light of so many lives, especially mine. everywhere she went, you could hear her laughing, which reflected her charisma and enthusiasmsome of the many characteristics that i will never forget about her. her presence was a force, which is how she will be remembered by all of us. natalia touched my life profoundly, as i am sure she did all of yours. she left many lessons and memories that will stay with me forever. i remember how she was always there for me in the worst times of my life, helping me and pushing me to keep going. i remember her expressing how important it was to accept our mistakes and failures and not let those things determine who we were and what we could achieve. i remember her constantly quoting fr. hesburgh when he said, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.”(https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7e ca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). we always try to seek perfection and success. and yes, it is essential to have goals and the purpose of achieving those goals that bring success. however, it is also necessary to recognize that it is okay to fail and make mistakes. life is a learning process, and we can’t learn if we don’t make mistakes. therefore, we should embrace all our qualities, including our flaws, and more importantly, we should embrace all our accomplishments and all our failings and understand that in the end, those are the things that make us strong and that make us who we are. and that is precisely what natalia did. she based her life on embracing every moment, experience, and lesson, whether it was a positive or negative one, and in the end, that is one of the qualities that made her the successful and strong person she came to be. natalia was the most persevering and determined person i had ever met. she believed in the product of hard work and therefore worked very hard to achieve all her goals. i remember her telling me how sometimes days went by, and she was so focused on her work she didn’t have a single moment to breathe, which was not always the ideal thing to happen. however, with time, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 she understood the importance of taking a minute for herself, a minute to breathe and slow down. by doing this, she allowed herself to see the real meaning and purpose of life, or whatever it is she was taking a minute from. she allowed herself to recognize what was in front of her, which reflected how deeply she cared for the purpose and real meaning of what surrounded her. there is a statement that i could use to reflect precisely what natalia meant by taking a break. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.”(https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ by pico lyer, ted moreau fye week one). i am sure natalia would want all of us to follow her word on taking a minute for us, and that way, appreciate what is in front of us, just like she did. as you can see, natalia cared about every little or simple thing. she believed everything was of great importance because at the end, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the moment or not.” (https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). that is one of the things i admired the most about natalia. she understood the impact every experience has on us, whether it’s something positive or negative, because, in the end, those experiences are what shape us into the person we become. furthermore, by having this in mind, we can appreciate more every moment, even the little ones, and motivates ourselves to seek significant and memorable experiences like the ones we shared with natalia and ones that can improve the person we’ve become and the person we want to be. natalia lived a life well-lived, in part because of her knowledge and acceptance of the significant impact each experience has in each of our lives. now that i mentioned the concept of a life well-lived, i think of the last conversation i had with natalia. she knew this day was coming, so she asked me to meet her for a significant conversation. so we went to my backyard and sat in front of my pool. sitting there, we started reminiscing about all the good memories and experiences we shared together; how we used to come to my house and just spend hours in the pool, laughing, playing games, and having the best times. after a while, she told me how she wanted to thank me for being one of the significant factors that made her believe she lived a well-lived life. natalia was a true believer in the importance of strong and real relationships. for her, having people that loved her and vice versa was one of the things she valued the most—hearing my best friend thanking me for the special and real relationship we had created filled my heart with so much joy and gratitudeu. natalia was and will remain to be my best friend. thanks to her, i understood how powerful a relationship can come to be and how important it is to surround ourselves with genuine relationships like my friendship with natalia. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ another of the many things i admire about natalia is how she based her life on hope and faith. "hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, bus is able to see tomorrow."(https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_ building_includes_everyone/transcript by pope francis moreau fye week seven). especially during difficult times, hope is that light that pushes us away from the darkness and lets us continue. natalia always relied on hope and always reinforced her point of how she believed all of us should do our best to seek hope and faith, as well as embrace our relationship with god. she focused on how god helped her live life with joy and gratitude as sad in (https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six), “but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that’s the reason how i was able to go through them and still trust in god and live with joy and gratitude.” suffering is a big part of all human beings’ lives. whether it be the loss of a loved one, a setback on an important project, an emotional or physical injury– we all have to deal with it. however, life is way more than suffering. it is about enjoyment, satisfaction, laughter with the people around us. regarding suffering, individuals need to avoid getting sidetracked and think that life revolves around overcoming suffering because it is way beyond that. that is why natalia always focused on; making sure she found the good in every day and lived her life focused on what made her happy. to conclude, i left what i considered to be the most valuable factor that made natalia the remarkable person she was. she had a kind of motto, and she focused on living according to her “motto’’ which was making the best out of life like it was the last day. as stated in(https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three), “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” this is a powerful message, but one that reflects exactly how natalia tried to live her life. as humans, we are aware that our time in this world will eventually come to an end. however, i think sometimes we forget what that really means. we forget to focus on the present and live for today. that is what natalia tried to avoid; she tried to live this life like every day was the last one. by saying this, i mean she tried to stop worrying so much and start actually living, trying to make the best out of her life, and enjoying the beauty of it. she focused her energy on the positive things that she enjoyed and fulfilled her. natalia was someone to admire; she left us with many lessons and experiences that will remain with us for the rest of our lives. she came to this world and impacted the lives of many. now she is gone physically, but her presence and our love for her will always stay with us. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html natalia lived a life well-lived, filled with love, real relationships, failures, success, and many more. we should use natalia as an inspiration. all that i am left to say is thank you, i am forever thankful for knowing natalia and creating such a beautiful relationship like the one we made. i will keep living for her, always have her in my heart, and remember her as the enthusiastic, brilliant, unique, and special person she always was. capstone integration how i am pursuing my mission statement at the university of notre dame as i’ve grown from a little girl into a young adult, my various experiences have shaped me into who i am today. so far through these experiences, i’ve lived a good life but there are still more ways i can pursue a life well-lived: by creating a positive, lasting impact on others’ lives. in fact, this is my main mission in life, and i plan to achieve this by bringing others joy and encouraging them to pursue their passions and prioritize faith (“university of notre dame mission statement” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). before attending notre dame, i lived a good life by my old standards. after becoming a student here and learning new things about what entails a life well-lived, my standards have been raised and i am continuing on working to meet those standards every day. my mission in life is to pass what i’ve learned on my journey to leading a life well-lived onto others and work to ensure they are living the best life they possibly can. someone that has inspired me to adopt this as my mission statement is father hesburgh. his dedication toward service and his heart of gold caused him to be a widely known and loved man a man for the people. how is my mission statement related to father hesburgh? everything he did was to better others’ lives from providing congress with what was needed to draft the civil rights laws to supporting mlk jr. by standing by his side in chicago despite the major controversy around mlk jr. at the time (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh’s actions were to better the lives of others, not his own. his success in bettering people's lives inspires me to strive to achieve the same. an important precursor to successfully impacting others’ lives is first making sure you are pursuing a good life. an essential aspect of this is self-reflection. when too much seems to be going on in life and you find it hard to count your blessings, taking time to reflect on your life and your actions can help you to gain a more positive attitude and allows you to figure out what changes you can make to better your life (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). once you have focused on ensuring you’re leading a life well-lived, one may wonder how someone stays motivated to impact others’ lives when that time could be spent bettering your own life for example, taking time to volunteer at a homeless shelter instead of using that time to work more so that you may buy yourself a treat. a unique approach introduced by sister aletheia is to intentionally think about your own death (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). when you die, no one will care about what your shoes looked like or the newest purse you bought. people will remember how you treated them and the impact you made on them, which is what helps keep me inspired to prioritize others’ joy over my own wants. now, one may wonder how to integrate your own passions with bettering others’ lives. this can be done by finding a career that fits your passions and talents, then using your specialty to impact others. as my finance professor, carl ackermann, taught me this semester, you can use your career to help others (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). ackermann taught his students how and where to invest our money so that we may get large returns and have a lot of money once we’re older. his lesson on personal finance did not end there he really emphasized the amount of lives we could impact with this money. he provided us with some examples: we https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ could give some to our parents who worked endlessly hard to ensure we are able to attend this great university, we could donate to cancer research funds, along with various other options the possibilities are endless! to sum up, ackermann taught us how to use our money from our career as a force for good in the world, which i’ve also learned by interacting with notre dame alumni who also majored in finance (“week five irishcompass activity” by moreau moreau fye week five). everyone endures setbacks in life that may make it difficult to pursue your goals. the obstacles we face in life need not be a reason for us to give up. we can instead learn how to cope with our struggles and come out stronger in the end (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). when i sometimes find it difficult to find motivation to keep going, having god by my side and knowing that he wants me to work toward bettering others’ lives helps me to stay motivated and continue pursuing this goal of mine. it is also crucial to understand that others also face struggles just as you do and accompanying them during their difficult times can make a big difference in helping them get through it and maintaining a positive mindset. by accompanying someone, you are embarking on a journey with them you are sharing with them their joyous experiences while also helping them get through any obstacles life throws at them (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). accompaniment is also a two-way street in times where you feel the need to be accompanied, you should reach out to others. a difficulty i may face in living my mission is conflict with others, yet i firmly believe that love always perseveres over hatred. if i don’t get along well with someone, i can prioritize love instead of holding grudges and not letting go of past disagreements (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). learning to overcome these disagreements and to continue working toward bettering everyone’s lives not just those with which i get along is an important part of my mission statement. in fact, disagreement is a crucial part of growth. if i were to surround myself with people who always agreed with me, i would never be challenged, and my own opinions, even if they may be wrong, would just be reaffirmed. yet, when i am exposed to people who may disagree with me, whether it be from different approaches to things or different ideas, i gain knowledge and wisdom from this as i am provided with new perspectives and viewpoints (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). this theme of persisting love that i continue to strive for is something i learned from the spirit of the university of notre dame. part of the university mission and vision states, “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god.” ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life moreau fye week ten). this demonstrates that everyone should be treated equally with justice and love, as we are all children of god. moreover, the mission of the congregation of holy cross communicates a similar idea by stating that “before the lord all of us are sinners and none is an enemy.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve). this also emphasizes that at our core we are all the same, so we must all treat each other equally and with love. in conclusion, attending the university of notre dame and applying the valuable lessons that i have learned from this course have caused me to formulate my very own mission statement that i continue to work toward every day: to better the lives of others, whether it be https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/524003?module_item_id=168041 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/524003?module_item_id=168041 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ through bringing them happiness, strengthening their relationship with god, and/or inspiring them to pursue their talents and dreams. week 8: integration 3 dear younger self, it’s you from the future! what are you up to? how is life treating you! my guess, considering i am you, is that you are doing awesome. no cares in the world, just focusing on multiplication tables, swimming techniques, and figuring out how to pull out your next tooth so that the tooth fairy will bring you 5 bucks. sounds pretty awesome to me. a lot of what i’m going to write to you about in this letter isn’t going to make sense yet. but it will one day. if i was to ask you what the meaning of life was, you would probably say to have fun. to smile. to enjoy your friends and family, the laughs, the monkey bars, the trampoline parks. and as you grow i don’t think that definition will change. too much, at least. i have learned a lot since i was seven years old. a lot has changed since i was seven. but no matter what, it is critical that you stay true to yourself, no matter what anyone says, because that is the key to true fulfillment. i’m going to tell you a few stories you will experience later in life, and some of the lessons i have learned along with them. i’m not telling you these so that you can change the course of your life. i am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, and it is important that you are aware that not everything is going to go smoothly. i also know your attention span is shorter than a baboon and you have the memory of a goldfish, so i don’t think any of this will be too much of a concern to you anyways. i, also you, am currently a freshman at the university of notre dame. you probably haven’t even heard of this school before, all you know right now is the university of southern california. bleh, you’ll get over that school fast. especially when you find out how much better we are than them at football. it’s far from home, and that can be really scary. but there is also nothing better for our personality. it will get you to branch out, explore outside your comfort zone, and learn more about yourself than any local college would. you are going to meet some amazing people, some who might even be groomsmen at our wedding one day. but don’t get me wrong, there have been a lot of hard parts. especially when it came to leaving my best friends and family. but i have grown so much since coming to notre dame, and there are four main pieces of advice i want to share with you, younger me, to help you live a fulfilling life. being apart from people i love with all my heart has been difficult. since even before your age, we have been extremely independent, never needing someone to tell us what to do, how to do it, or when to get something done. i mean by the age of 10 we started thinking of where we wanted to end up for college. the distance was never a concern. but being away from other people and distractions made me look internally, focusing on how i can better myself. tasha eurich says, “people who possess greater insightwhich he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselvesenjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness.”(moreau week six). for a long time, i wondered why i was so unhappy here at notre dame. i had plenty of friends, was doing fine in school, although extremely stressed, and swimming was going okay. while i was fitting in, i realized that i hadn’t found my true identity here. i started reflecting more, i began praying, taking walks to the grotto, and even meditating when i found time. pico iyer says, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape”(moreau week one). that was the missing puzzle piece. i mean you know, our family has always been pretty religious. and every night when our head would touch the pillow, a quick prayer would be said. for your mom, your dad, the cops, the military, your friends, teachers, for good luck on tests, anything and anyone throughout the day that would cross your mind. as we grew up, we began to lose touch with this. but that is the seed that keeps us rooted. coming to a catholic institution has allowed me to rekindle my prayerful relationship with god, and focus on reflecting on things that we are grateful to have. so my first piece of advice younger me: never stop praying, never stop reflecting. it completes our identity, is what continues to give us hope, and allows the brain to decompress the constant overload of information we receive every day. it encourages us to continue to live a life well-lived. if i were to describe the meaning of life in one word, it would be relationships. the bonds we form with one another are essential to the feeling of fulfillment. there are a lot of aspects to relationships, many ups and downs, but for someone as outgoing as us, the key to a strong relationship is joy, and the best way to experience joy is through fun. the other week i had a discussion with two of my closest friends here at notre dame. the goal of the talk was to learn more about myself through others, and i think it's safe to say i learned a lot. my friends, andrew and chris, discussed how i am full of excitement, adventure, and fun. they told me they have never had a negative interaction with me, which is something i really took to heart (moreau week 5). as you know, we have always been happy, outgoing, and fun. all the friends we would make in the burger king play place can attest to that. so hearing that we haven’t changed since made me feel really good. enjoying the ride is a part of having a good life, so my second piece of advice is to always keep things lighthearted and fun. enjoy the moment, for it only lasts so long. and i plan on carrying that throughout my career. the meruelo center for family development says, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” (moreau week 4). i think i have always known myself pretty well, but i think talking with my friends made me realize how important it is to keep the mentality of younger me at the center of everything i do. sometimes i slip away from myself, but knowing my true personality, my passion to do good, my ability to make anything enjoyable, is something i need to carry with me throughout my life. i know i am going to fail. not everything in life can be smooth sailing. but as father hesburgh said, “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (moreau week 2). as long as i keep my passions, talents, and traits at the center of everything i do, passions i’ve had since childhood, i see myself living a fulfilling life. so my third piece of advice: never change for anyone, and stick to being yourself. relationships go beyond simply the people we interact with every day. i know you hear the stories from mom all the time. she tells you about her home, where she grew up, the densely populated city of manila, philippines, where almost 2 million people reside. she is one of the most prayerful and grateful people in our lives, because of the situation she had to grow up in. we were blessed enough to not have to deal with what she did, and have been given so many opportunities to succeed and live a prosperous life. and this is a passion that has been a part of who we are, but giving back to other people is by far the most important aspect of a life well-lived. as pope francis said, “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (moreau week 7). sharing your talents, your gifts, your abilities with others. father michael himes said it best. fr michael himes says it best. “the central issue in being a human being… is what the new testament calls agape, a very particular form of love, a love which is self gift, a way of giving oneself away to the ‘other’” (moreau week 3). showing love to others helps us develop a greater connection with them, and also makes us feel better about ourselves. showing others we care, giving back to the community, giving peace and love, makes humans feel, well, human. so my fourth and final piece of advice: never be afraid to show love, and always pay your blessings forward. i know you probably can’t pay attention to this many words, younger me. and that’s okay. i don’t expect you to understand everything. but as you grow, keep those four things at the center of your life, and never let them go, for that is what will help us live the most fulfilling life we can. take care of yourself, and never forget to do good for others. works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, moreau fye week one “hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau fye week two “three key questions” by fr. michael himes, moreau fye week three “navigating your career journey” by mfccd, moreau fye week four “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, moreau fye week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, moreau fye week seven brisny rodriguez flores professor comuniello fye 29 april 2022 requiem: a forest of stories my mission is to be able to give back to my community in a way that is true to myself. i wish to be able to learn as much as i can, not in the classroom, but also outside of it. i wish to be able to understand and hear the stories that people are willing to share, and to place myself in a way where i’m able to listen to them. through this, i hope i may be able to help them or even just be there for them. in this way i hope to help give comfort or even acknowledgement to the people who may need it. showing that, yes they can be heard. and yes there are some who can listen and even give back. the strength and level of change that gives people, is vast and has been most publicly noticed with father greg boyle (‘chapter 7: jurisdiction’ by father greg boylemoreau fye week 7). who, through breaking down his own barriers, was able to let others into his jurisdiction, and as a result was able to listen to the stories and reasoning of the people he tried to help the most. through this, i hope to be able to eventually allow more people in, past the shields that i have built and past the barriers i have made. so that they too can see my story and to be able to listen as well. but there are two main things most, if not everybody needs to be careful of in doing this. one is that in the process of letting them in, we as those who listen, must make sure we don’t take control of the situation . this should be a give or take relationship. one that isn’t marked by a singular person taking complete control of the situation. second, a trait that may go hand in hand with the first, is that we need to make sure we don’t become their voice. as professor steve reinfenburg stated, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,” he said at the workshop. “this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.”, (‘teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together’ by professor steve reinfenburg-moreau fye week 9). i wish to be successful in my student life and, in the future, in my career. through this, i wish to bring, not just pride to my family, but also be someone that somebody could look up to. someone that they could look to and say, she made it, so that means i can too ( which growing up was a key motivator in my life). through this, by becoming a figure in people’s lives, i hope that i can open the conversation of race and immigration in a deeper more current fashion than the ones that have currently been taking place. dr. robin d’angelo has stated that ,”“we can manage the first round of challenge by ending the discussion through platitudes — usually something that starts with “people just need to,” or “race doesn’t really have any meaning to me,” or “everybody’s racist.” scratch any further on that surface, however, and we fall apart.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism,” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week 10). this lack of discussion with a group that most minorities don’t really interact with can and has been found to be detrimental as it has often led to an echo chamber or a bubble. as the few minorities who may discuss it with this group or oftentimes those who have views that most align with it. with an echo chamber and bubble being defined as “echo chambers: a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited’ ‘hearing a very narrow narrative on the internet’ that is what a buddle is, …‘bubbles can become echo chambers when the group gives up tolerating outside views.’” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). but to be able to talk about race, about immigration. to be able to help people like me, i must first be able to face what happened the summer before my 5th grade year. dean g. marcus cole (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12) has stated that “ what my friends may not know, but surely suspect, is that each report of racial violence at the hands of a police officer or group of men brings to the surface the vivid memories of that terrible night.” he had the strength to tell the story of what happened that day. and while no one was hurt in mine, i wish to one day be able to talk about my own story. through this, i hope to obtain the strength and courage to one day help the rest of the kids in my community, who had to go through the same situation i had to, growing up. be it in applying to college or even having to take the necessary steps to get through the loss, temporary or not, of someone they care about. moreau capstone integration mahoney 1 alison thigpen moreau first year experience 15 april 2022 a mission of faith to orient life my personal mission statement will guide me on the path to pursue a life well-lived. i appreciate the little things in life, as i recognize that life is a gift and we are only on earth for a short time. i challenge others around me to embrace humanity and all aspects of life, which includes both successes and failures. i believe that we are not given a good life or a bad life, and it is up to us to make life good or bad. to be successful and positively impact the world and those around us, we must recognize that we have power over our own actions, not outside events, and this realization will spark change and initiate action. my faith is at the core of my being, as my spiritual journey is the path that permits all other roads of personal development. i strive to discover the face of christ in all those around me, and i work to ensure that i act as christ did when i engage with others that are both similar and different to myself. as i strive to grow in wisdom, my focus lies not only on my education, but also on my spiritual, personal, and social development as i grow more knowledgeable in my worldview. my responsibilities to others and the world are immense, as i must treat those around me with dignity and respect at all times, regardless of one’s identity or beliefs. this often requires great courage, as it is significantly easier to engage with those similar to ourselves rather than expanding beyond one’s comfort zone. while at notre dame, my comfort zone has been challenged as i engage with numerous people of distinct backgrounds and experiences. as i engage with those around me and embrace mahoney 2 what it means to be human, i discover the face of god in those around me as i strive to further his word in my role as a woman of faith (personal mission statement moreau fye week 13). as i continue through my academic and spiritual journey at notre dame, my mission statement will animate my life over the next three years so that i can pursue a life well-lived. the bonds that i have forged at notre dame have been particularly powerful in shaping my experiences, as the people around me strengthen my faith and provide a strong sense of community. however, i must ensure that i keep a reflective balance between my strong connections with others and my own thoughts. a life well-lived is pursued as i strengthen not only my relationship with others, but also my relationship with myself and my internal relationship with god. it is true that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). not only is it dangerous to lose contact with ourselves, but one can stray from a life-well lived when one is trapped in an echo chamber of voices. shankar vedantam states, “if you're a red sox fan, of course, you are deriving satisfaction precisely from the camaraderie you have with like-minded people as opposed to reaching out to people who might actually be outside the echo chamber” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain moreau fye week 11). in order to pursue a life-well lived and abide by my mission statement, i must ensure that i have christ present in all my interactions with people both similar and different from myself. the congregation of the holy cross guides audiences as they outline, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross” by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week 12). this quote deeply https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ mahoney 3 reflects my mission statement and the foundation of a life well-lived, as i must view the world through a lens of faith and see that all humans are created in the image and likeness of god. a life well-lived is one guided by god, and my mission statement outlines my desire to lead by example and find gratitude when responding with god to suffering. when i utilize my faith to find joy within great suffering, i can begin to appreciate all that i can do, rather than what i do not have. however, a life well-lived does not indicate that life will be free of hardships, sufferings, or failures. in the film hesburgh, audiences are reminded that “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week 2). in my pursuit of a life well-lived, i will abide by my mission statement to live in the moment and enjoy the beauty of life at all times. dr. kim encourages us “to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by dr. kim, grotto moreau fye week 6). although a life well-lived can be characterized by adaptability to unexpected changes on new paths, there will be times when it is difficult to abide by my mission statement. to that point, i often dwell on past decisions and imagine alternative future outcomes rather than appreciating the little moments in life. when i had my discernment reflection with my dad, he told me something that was difficult to say but important to hear: you will always have small regrets as you go through your career path, but you must always continue on your path and not dwell on these regrets, as things always happen for a reason (discernment reflection moreau fye week 5). my mission statement will be challenged in my remaining time at notre dame, as there will continually be moments that i regret or that may lead me astray from my path. however, i must remain steadfast and keep my faith in my vision to strengthen my pursuit of a life well-lived. notre dame’s center for career https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 mahoney 4 development reminds students that “it is imperative to take time after an experience or conversation to think intentionally about how it impacted you” since “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by the center for career development moreau fye week 4). my mission statement describes how i want to orient my life, and i can assess my experiences at notre dame to determine how an experience shapes my personal mission statement. as my experiences influence my mission statement and my perception of the world around me, my mission may change over my time at notre dame as i learn more about myself and how i want to live my life in the face of challenges and unforeseen opportunities. while at notre dame, my personal mission will be strengthened, challenged, and changed by my conversations and interactions with others both similar and different from myself. pope francis opens his powerful speech by stating that “life is not merely time passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). as i interact with other students and form a strong sense of community, i will ensure that others see my mission in action as i use a lens of faith to view all as children of christ. furthermore, i will sustain my faith as the core of my being so that my interactions with others can be based upon faith and form a strong sense of community inspired by god. notre dame’s rich community enables my mission statement of faith to be visible to others, and notre dame’s guide to student life states, “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). this quote reflects the foundation of my mission statement, and therefore my personal mission will be able to thrive and https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ mahoney 5 be present in all my actions during my time at notre dame. as i pursue a life well-lived, i strive for my personal mission statement to be seen in action as i keep god at the center of my being and strive to discover the face of christ in all people that i encounter. steve reifenberg writes that “they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). my mission statement will be strengthened in my time at notre dame as my internal and personal relationship with god will be transformed into a life of faith in which my actions reveal god to all those around me through accompaniment. furthermore, my pursuit of a life well-lived will be marked by embracing humanity in all aspects of life, including successes and failures as well as life and death. although thinking about death and the future can be frightening, sister alethia reminds us that “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun that wants you to remember you will die” by sister aletheia moreau fye week 3). my mission statement to seek the good in life at all times has been challenged this year as i experienced the death of family members, and i know i will experience further challenges in my time at notre dame. however, these challenges will result in my mission statement being further strengthened as i keep my faith as the primary focus of my life and discover happiness in both the darkness of death and light of life. my personal mission statement reflects my desire to live a faith-filled life and discover the face of god in all those that i encounter around me. in my time at notre dame, it has been so much easier to grow closer to god, and i know that this relationship will only be strengthened as my relationships with others in our academic community are simultaneously strengthened. my https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html mahoney 6 mission statement will animate my life over the next few years as i join those around me in accompaniment, spiritual journeys, academic experiences, and in appreciation of the little moments in life. there will be times when it is difficult to live this mission, such as moments when i encounter death, suffering, and struggles. however, i will keep my personal mission statement as a guiding force in my life so that others can see my mission statement in action as i engage with them in faith. integration 3 3/2/22 integration 3 my two lives, the one i have lived and the one to come in writing my own eulogy, i decided to divide things up into two parts, the first being the life that i have already lived and the second being the life i hope to live before my time comes. i am doing this because currently my life has not been the most impactful, but at only nineteen years old, not many lives have been. my first life has been filled with youthful milestones, and following the natural progression my parents pushed me towards. finishing elementary school, then middle school, and eventually high school were all expected of me. these are not achievements that carried much weight in my mind. to me, the biggest accomplishments were the ones that were unexpected and i had to work towards. when speaking with a close friend we both agreed that what i valued most were the achievements that did not come easy. my acceptance to notre dame, graduating as salutatorian of my high school, placing in the wrestling state championship, these were the things that i took the most pride in (conversation with george, february 3, 2022, week 5). however, for most of high school i was constantly working, whether that was towards school, athletics, or my actual job, and i never gave myself time to just take a deep breath. in order to achieve some of my goals i thought i had to constantly be working or else i'd fall behind. looking back on that, and comparing to where i am now, i’ve learned that taking pauses are such an important part of a healthy lifestyle. during my senior year of high school i started to realize the effect social media and constantly working had on my mental health. after noticing this i started to embrace the idea of taking a pause every day. i took little breaks, meditated, and ultimately put myself first. this idea resonated in week one when we discussed pico iyer's ted talk, and specifically how technology has made it increasingly difficult to relax. ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer week 1) where i currently am in life is an interesting place where a lot of important decisions have to be made to determine what occurs in my next life. decisions such as my major, which classes i want to take, what career path i want to pursue all have to be made. i recently had a meeting with my academic counselor evaluating what path i want to follow and we essentially discussed the three questions fr. himes mentions in “three key questions”("three key https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 questions" by fr. michael himes week 3). we talked about where i want to be in the future, and what i see myself doing for work and whether i think i’ll be happy doing that. i have also looked into the career development center to decide which future career i may think about pursuing. currently, i am planning on attending law school and pursuing a career as a lawyer. i came to this conclusion and got a better general sense of it while reading the navigating your career journey article("navigating your career journey" by moreau first year experience week 4). however, i still cannot know for certain what the future holds for me. likes, passions, and interests can all change especially during these next three years of school. looking at my future self, i have hope that my life is filled with many things i have become proud of. i hope one day i do find a job that i enjoy and find success in, i hope i end up happily married, and i hope i have kids to call my own. overall, i hope i leave an impact long after i have passed. this is the message that resonated with me after watching hesburgh and seeing everything that fr. hesburgh achieved in his life (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christen o’malley week 2). while my future accomplishments might not be as grand as those of fr. hesburgh, i do believe that i can make a difference in the lives of many. most importantly i want to be a good father. for me, if i only get to accomplish one thing in life i would choose being a good father and raising my kids with all the love i can give. in my opinion that is the most important thing a person can do in their lifetime, and it leaves a lasting impression on the world. after that, i hope i can help others by means of my occupation. potentially by doing pro-bono jobs if i do end up as a lawyer. after reading and learning about fr. boyle in tattoos on the heart, i gained a new respect for those who are willing to give for others in less fortunate scenarios ("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle week 7). i do hope one day i can affect the lives of other families in a way fr. boyle has because it would be a way for me to give other kids a chance to have a loving and caring mom or dad. maybe it would save a life, or free an innocent man. i can not yet know what the future will hold but i am certain that i will want to give back. all the talk of my future comes with much uncertainty, but it also comes with internal dedication. while life can drastically change at any given moment, i will not change my will to help others. in “5 minutes” by aria swarr, i heard of a life altering sudden event in the life of dr. kim. a fun trip snowboarding with friends took away dr. kim’s ability to walk, but it did not take away his ability to live, love, or pursue his dreams ("5 minutes" by aria swarr, grotto week 6). this was a really beautiful story to me and i hope a similar dedication to life shows in https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981/download?download_frd=1 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 my future regardless of what i have to face. i hope that no matter what circumstances i am put into i know god has set me on my own path. i hope that i will always remember to live and love no matter what life throws at me, because those are the parts of life that make it worth living. the love we feel towards each other, our families, spouses, and god is why we can overcome the tough times and it is something that i hope will always stay with me regardless of what the future may bring. david lassen moreau first year experience 3/4/2022 chasing our passions what is a life well lived? is it, perhaps, one that you find professional success? is it one where you feel loved or happy? or is it, instead, more about what’s left behind-the legacy that lasts? today we are gathered together to honor and celebrate the life and legacy of . she was many different things to different people: a friend, coworker, mother, boss, sister, business partner, wife. yet in every role she filled, she did so with spirit, confidence, and kindness. she exemplified how to live life well. her life embodied her mantra: find your passion in all that you do, and always follow the path it leads you on. maggie was always a bright student. she loved to learn, and she excelled in school. she constantly asked questions and tried new things. maggie believed in doing anything that made you happy; she believed in following her passions. she joined business clubs, performing groups, even her high school rugby team. father michael presented three basic questions to guide people on their path: “what gives you joy? what are you really good at? what do the people around you really need?” (“three key questions” adapted from fr. michael himes moreau week 3). father michael suggests that choosing our vocations is much more simple than most people make it out to be, and maggie did her best to embody that. she spent a lot of time reflecting on what she wanted out of her life and what was important to her. maggie wasn’t perfect; she struggled with self growth like the rest of us. the difference is that she never gave up. maggie turned to tasha eurich’s advice for self reflection: asking not why, but what. what kind of person did she want to be (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6)? amidst a lot of confusion of what path she should take, she instead focused on who she would feel most proud of being. she felt passionate about both music and business, so she followed a path that combined the two so that she was happy, she excelled, and she helped others. maggie’s path was not an easy one, and she struggled to find her way many times. with her close friends and advisors, she began opening up about difficult decisions or problems she couldn’t solve. she trusted that an outside source would give her a perspective she couldn’t see for herself. she discussed what was important to her, her strengths, and her weaknesses. she valued other’s opinions and listened to their advice (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5). her friends assured her of her ability to connect with people and defend her positions, so she took chances in her job, sticking up for venues and art corporations she believed could be successful. she spent time on-site in theaters, or working with artists on contracts. however, maggie knew her limits. even with so many responsibilities, maggie always tried to make time for herself. she truly believed that self growth was the greatest form of success, so she also gave herself time alone to unwind. this tradition started her first semester of college: once a month, she would plan a night completely to herself. no matter what her friends or family were doing, she would make a cup of tea, read a book, or watch a movie. she spent time with herself to relax and reflect. maggie would always say that being busy is not a reason to ignore self reflection, but it demands it. she would always joke about the fact that gandhi would meditate for two hours instead of one on his busiest days, but pico iyer’s article proves that to be true. he writes, “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). maggie worked hard to balance a demanding schedule with a need for her mental well-being, and she taught us all to do the same. beyond any personal or work successes, maggie’s biggest devotion was to the people surrounding her. she worked to foster collaboration and community, both at work and at home. at her job, she was a frontrunner for cooperative teamwork in business. she believed in the importance of having mentors for advice and guidance. at notre dame, maggie was exposed to a large network of talented, successful people who wanted to impart wisdom to later graduates. meruelo career center at notre dame urges students to take advantage of their resources to “reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). she connected with alumni, older students, guest speakers, and professors to help her learn more about the business world and how to navigate its difficulties. not only did these connections help her to choose the best path for her talents, but they also proved the importance of community. maggie truly felt it was her obligation to create a community of people she was proud to be a part of. pope francis said, “each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). pope francis believed that solidarity was the key to positive change. likewise, maggie promoted teamwork at her job and collaboration on difficult projects. she was supportive and kind, and prided herself on being someone her community could count on. she cared about the people around her; the center of her life was always focused on her friends and family. so what is a life well lived? it looks different for many people, but the most important part about a life is the impact it left. a life well lived is someone who used their talents to improve themselves and their world. take father hesburgh, former president of notre dame, maggie’s alma mater; he helped to ratify civil rights laws, turn notre dame into a prestigious school, and even received the presidential medal of freedom. according to the movie “hesburgh”, father hesburgh “belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind. i think he truly believed that he had lived the life the father wanted him to do.” to father hesburgh, a life well lived was using your talents to leave a lasting impact (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). maggie did the same; she used her drive and intuition in business to grow the arts, and promoted collaboration through service and her work. however, the most important thing she did was for the people around her. she believed in personal growth. she believed in supporting others. she believed in diving headfirst into what you were passionate about. the legacy she leaves behind is just that; maggie taught us all how to follow our passion in life, learn from our mistakes, and support others as they do the same. to me, that is a life well lived. fye moreau: integration 3 the fall of the swag master death is something that we are not foreign to, but it is something that we rarely discuss. over the course of our life, we have all been, well at least supposed to have been, striving to achieve one common goal: heaven. we are supposed to be working as a community, hand in hand, hoping that one day we can make it. it is easy to acknowledge that yes this is the goal, however, how do we actually get there? we must stop and think, have we actually lived a life well lived? grace was a kind spirit. she was involved in a multitude of activities in her lifetime. she played three sports, balanced a social life, and still maintained good grades. she was actively involved in the church and attended weekly mass. one thing that she failed to do was slow down. she was constantly seen going from one place to another with little time to think about her emotional well being. she always focused on making other people happy and as a result she failed to do the same for herself. an important quote that i believe everyone needs to hear is that “it’s precisely those who are the busiest who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). we need to understand that always having a crammed schedule is not the best thing we can do for ourselves. it is okay to give yourself a break once in a while. although grace spent little time focusing on herself, she did always try to put others first. she hated confrontation, but disliked more when people were upset. it pained her to see the people she cared about in conflict with one another. grace made it her goal to end the issue and bring those people back together because at the end of the day. in life, crossroads “are where the differences of culture, religion and conviction can coexist with friendship, civility, hospitality and especially love '' (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). as the mediator of her friends, she used her humor to end strife between the groups. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 another thing she struggled with, is not knowing what she wanted to do in life. however, i argue that this is not a bad thing. in our society there “ seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path.” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week four). we are told we need to have everything figured out at certain points in life, but that is simply not true. i wish she knew that she did not need to put so much pressure on this idea that we need to know everything about our future. all we really need is to focus on what makes us happy and pursue that path in our journey. one big attribute of grace was that she was a big family girl. her mom even “said that what she thinks i value most in life is family and what i desire most in life is to be successful” (moreau week 5). family was a big part of her life. she loved her mom and sister so much that she would have done absolutely anything for them. most siblings have rivalries and are in constant conflict with one another. this was quite the opposite for grace and sophia. her sister was her best friend. nothing brought her more happiness than being with her other half, sophia. one thing that was extremely important in grace’s life was volunteering. she spent a lot of time volunteering at food pantries and participating in organizations such as best buddies. furthermore, it is important to start focusing “on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by jihoon kim moreau fye week 6). i believe a lot of us fail to realize sometimes. we can get so caught up in all the negative things and all the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ limitations in our lives that we forget to look at what we are actually capable of. grace made sure to put a lot of emphasis on service of others which is something that we can all follow in suit of. not only was she active in the service life, but she was also hopeful. you might be asking yourself what exactly is hope? hope is “the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). hope is not something that we had to disregard the issues we face in the world and naively wish for things to be better. rather it means that we need to acknowledge these things, but know that there is always another day that we can go out and make a difference in this world. it also does not require every single person, but rather one person that can ignite a cascade of events sparking hope in others. grace was hopeful of many things. she always was seeking the best in people and praying to god when seemed to have no light at the end of the tunnel. life is such a beautiful gift that we sometimes take for granted. we need to start “appreciating the present and focus on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). we need to be living in the moment rather than worrying about all the what-ifs in life. if we are so caught up in all the negativity in the world then we can never truly enjoy life to the fullest, living a proper life well lived. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html how do i pursue a life well-lived? how i pursue a life well-lived should be a life-long question and the answer to which won’t be revealed until the end of one’s life since time is the only limit of what a person can achieve in his or her years alive. however, starting to think about a life well-lived and composing a mission statement in the first year of college is meaningful since these 4-year-period will greatly influence my worldview in the foreseeable future. i tried to slow down this semester to thoroughly think about what i want to learn from this university. just like pico iyer indicated in his article, slowing down can help us think over about ourselves and find a more focused direction of marching (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in the beginning, i was quite stressed about “choosing the wrong direction.” but a quote from fr. hesburgh, “it wasn’t how i expected to serve the country, but i was serving in my own way (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’ malley moreau fye week two),” brought me confidence. no matter what academic degree i choose, a notre dame education will endow me with the ability to make a difference. although when the opportunity will come is unknown, there’s no need to panic since the only thing worth attention is to grab the present. by asking myself what i want to bring to my community and the society instead of why i am so eager about transferring into mendoza (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six), i realized that money and social status is not what i want. business for me is the most powerful tool to promote social changes since capital is the blood of development and the propulsion for changes. i want to use business to do good for society. what improvements can i make? what aspects am i going to focus on? pope francis told us that “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven).” notre dame vision itself as a place “welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated. we value gay and lesbian members of this community as we value all members of this community (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame moreau fye week ten).” yes, the world and the school should be inclusive, and myriad people are trying their best to fulfill the vision. but there’s still a long way to go for the world to become a truly inclusive one. my experiences with my roommate made me realize how sexual minorities are suffering on campus. the fear of being not like the mainstream student body, the anxieties about not being able to get involved in the single-sex dorms, and the lack of confidence to communicate with other people brought them hard times. notre dame is not anti-lgbtqs and the school has measures to support the group; however, the catholic culture is innately remote from an lgbtq-friendly community. how can we reconcile these conflicts on and even beyond the campus? “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve)” these words remind us that not having fatal experiences of being discriminated against does not mean we are not victims. racial discrimination is related to everyone in the society, while african americans’ sufferings are not the whole picture. how can we make notre dame more diverse while maintaining its culture? how can i make sure students of any background are able to find a place here on campus? how can the growing racial conflicts in the united states be mitigated? all these experiences and questions generated by which helped me to choose business and global affairs as my two majors. while business enables me to understand how modern society runs, global affairs deepens my understanding of cross-cultural communications and social phenomena like lgbtqs, racial disharmony, and religious conflicts on a macro basis. focusing on the upcoming three years in college, i plan to propose measures to improve the well-being of sexual minorities on campus. for example, we can add content about embracing sexual minorities around us by using eloquent theological explanations in the moreau classes. i also want to explore a career path in socially beneficial investing to diverge money into companies or organizations that are contributing to a more equal world. focusing on my entire life, i want to become a power of good in society, forming strong and long-lasting bonds with people, and bringing happiness to beloved ones. the world we live in today is suffering. environmental degradation is constantly speeding up, and most humans are not taking it seriously. should no effective measures be taken, liveable earth would become history sooner than everybody expected. everyone is responsible to address and even solve the issue. i am eager to join the trend and try my best to secure a brighter future for the earth. the people around the world are suffering. inequalities in ethnicities, genders, regions and social classes are separating society at an unseen speed. as someone who has been quite empathetic, i can feel the pains and i would like to bridge these gaps, and even advocate for more people to join. i value all kinds of connections to different people. sincere and deep relationships should be formed through communication, cooperation, and mutual understanding. family, friends, and lovers: i am more than fortunate to encounter any people i encountered in my life since the world is so big and the possibilities of getting to know each other are so low. the best way of showing gratitude for these beautiful possibilities is to cherish these relationships. my parents sacrificed a lot to provide me with a world-class education in the past years. they endowed me with their precious experiences and a higher start point compared to many else. i am more than privileged and blessed to have their love, and it is crucial for me to take family responsibility as soon as possible and pay them back. my best friends supported me for many years and carried me through difficult times of my life. i also want to do more for them. if all the above-mentioned goals and objectives were met, i would have little reluctance to death anymore. sister alethia, a nun who spent years emphasizing the significance of remembering death, once said that “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen–both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful (“mee the nun who wants to you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three ).” people tend to forget that there always will be an end as they try their best to enjoy the very present. however, just like a full sentence must come with ending punctuation, it is death that makes life complete and one’s time limited. always remembering that life is short helps me avoid wasting time, and eventually receive happiness. as long as i tried my best in this limited life, i am well-lived, and i am blessed. nickerson fys2 integration 3 dr. david lassen moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 content at the end george washington, in the farewell address in which he voluntarily walked away from the human will to power, said: though, in reviewing the incidents of my administration, i am unconscious of intentional error, i am nevertheless too sensible of my defects not to think it probable that i may have committed many errors. whatever they may be, i fervently beseech the almighty to avert or mitigate the evils to which they may tend. i shall also carry with me the hope that my country will never cease to view them with indulgence; and that, after forty five years of my life dedicated to its service with an upright zeal, the faults of incompetent abilities will be consigned to oblivion, as myself must soon be to the mansions of rest. (washington's farewell address, september 19, 1796). this was the sentiment aidan expressed to me shortly before he passed. aidan—a strong practitioner of introspection—was acutely aware of the impact of his relationships with others. a subscriber of pico iyer, he too believed that “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this practice of introspection began at his jesuit high school, where he learned to practice the ignatian examen. he believed self-knowledge, through introspection, colors and reveals god’s presence in our lives. it was this practice that allowed him to not stress about the little things throughout his life, because worrying about the outcome of an exam or a long term project would only cripple him from enjoying the present— living. living was also how he discerned his career in medicine. when his college career center told him that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”aidan took it to heart ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). he discovered a passion for medicine and care for others by simply doing. whether volunteering at memorial hospital’s nicu or shadowing a family friend, aidan discerned his passion at a relatively young age. but aidan also understood that a constant reappraisal of “is this working for me” and the courage to change or leave if the answer to that question is “no” is necessary to career happiness, and was always open to new opportunities. surrounded by death in the clinical environment had a tremendous impact on aidan’s outlook on life. like sister theresa aletheia noble, aidan recognized that death is not inherently bad— it is everyone’s reality whether we like it or not. accepting this and remembering our death “keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau week three). after the death of his coach andew lee, aidan recognized that celebrating the good done by the dead—in andew’s case, his example of selfless leadership and tenacity and hope—reveals the breathtaking beauty of humanity. https://www.govinfo.gov/content/pkg/gpo-cdoc-106sdoc21/pdf/gpo-cdoc-106sdoc21.pdf https://www.govinfo.gov/content/pkg/gpo-cdoc-106sdoc21/pdf/gpo-cdoc-106sdoc21.pdf https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html in addition to andew, there were many figures throughout aidan’s life that he credits for inspiration and guidance. his parents, for one, provided him with incredible and selfless support and opportunities throughout his life. these figures helped give aidan perspective. j.d. kim, for example, was confined to a wheelchair after an accident and without function in most of his body. he was in such despair that he said “one of the sad things was that i couldn't even attempt to use any weapons to take away my life” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). however, he turned to god for support and became an inspiring speaker and pastor. life, aidan learned through j.d., was not about avoiding suffering but instead responding to it with god, with cheer, and with others. suffering was and continues to be all around. as a physician, father, husband, and friend, aidan tried to ease the suffering of those around him and be a source of joy. throughout his life, aidan sought out relationships with others— those from all walks of life and whose presence here today is a testimony to his friendship. aidan, in the words of fr. greg boyle, tried to bridge “the gulf of mental judgment and replac[e] it with kinship” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). putting past disagreements aside, embracing differences, and engaging in a relationship was something aidan tried to do with everyone he knew, even if it sometimes took him a while to look past prior transgressions. in addition to fr. greg boyle, aidan has spoken many times about the influence of father ted hesburgh in his life. as a graduate of the university of notre dame, aidan was very familiar with the life of fr. hesburgh. aidan kept one line from hesbugh’s 1987 laetare medal address on the wall of his office— a line which i am sure he would want you all to also live by. we don’t know where we're going from here and we don’t know what we’re going to do. but i can guarantee you there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice and at times human stupidity. there are many songs yet to be sung in the name of joy and happy marriages and good families and a dedication to all that’s good and true and beautiful. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) building bridges, fighting battles, climbing mountains, and approaching life with a smile and quick joke, finding meaning through action and introspection— this is what aidan took from fr. hesburgh. i had a conversation with my old roommate many years ago about a life well-lived— back in 2022 when we were freshman (moreau fye week 5). back then, he said he wanted to feel like he’s made a difference, to be happy, and share that happiness with others. he told me that he realized that he didn't need to save the world or cure cancer to live a life well-lived. although he tried to cure cancer, he made a positive impact on all those he met. that, i believe, would satisfy him. a human, he erred many times, yet as he now enters the “mansions of rest” i know i will remember him fondly. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008?module_item_id=168045 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 mullery theo helm moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 looking for something more throughout all my life, i have longed for something greater than what most people find fulfilling. i have always had a “good” life by most standards, with a stable family, good friends, and a strong sense of personal accomplishment, but at the same time i have, for as long as i can remember, wished for something else. even at notre dame, my dream school for my entire life, i had all the pieces of what i thought made me happy, yet i often felt like i was still just playing an act. as i have navigated through the last two semesters, i have at least partially found the answer to my burning desire—what my true mission is. especially through my theology class this semester, i have come to realize that god has called me to serve others through his love (“week 13 qqc” by moreau fye week 13). only through doing this can i reach full fulfillment and have the life i have always wanted. one of my biggest sources of learning about my own mission has come from the example of notre dame, especially father hesburgh: “they would talk about how he would be gone so much and he would travel around, but the reason he did that was to set the example for the faculty and for the students that the institution needed to be engaged in the world” (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). i also draw a lot of inspiration from the catholic church, which at its core is meant to represent jesus’ teachings: “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion. scriptural accounts of jesus provide a constant witness of this inclusiveness. jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from the notre dame mission moreau fye week 10). lastly, my mission was partially developed with the idea of accompaniment in mind, as i strive to be there for others while also acknowledging that i don’t have all the answers: “‘some people are happy only if they are helping,’ he added. ‘this is a question of friendship you must learn to be beside, walking with another person.’ it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). over the next few years and really all of my life, i plan to put this mission into practice in a number of ways. i am deeply committed to my studies in addition to trying to serve others, so diving fully into the career development process in order to find my true vocation is very important to me: “[dr. donald super] contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i also want to remember the little things, knowing that i do not need much to be happy: “after admiral richard e. byrd spent nearly five months alone in a shack in the antarctic, in temperatures that sank to 70 degrees below zero, he emerged convinced that ‘half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). my one wish is to be someone who will always be there to support others, no matter what they are going through. i love to have late night conversations with people and talk about what’s really important in life, knowing that these conversations are beneficial both for the people i have them with and for myself: “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves” (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau fye week five). i want to be the type of person who does not worry about the meaningless things in life. one of those things is often politics—maybe not the issues themselves but the way people think about them: “it looks much more like what they're doing is similar to a sports fanatic engaged in sports or a foodie watching food shows, reading restaurant reviews. it seems much more in that category of life than in the category of power acquisition” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). instead, i want to focus on thinking seriously about important issues, knowing that i have the power to make change in this world. at times, i have struggled with getting in my own head too much, but i learned over a long time the dangers of this and avoided them: “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i care deeply, and even though that has hurt me in the past, i will still do my best to make this world a better place; i am very passionate about trying to bring people together by putting aside their differences: “the challenge is getting them to abandon the territory of their gang and replace it with a turf more ample, inclusive, and as expansive as god’s own view of things” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” from tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). lastly, i do not want to bog myself down with thinking about death and the fear that comes with it. rather, i want to use my eventual death (whenever it is) to motivate me to live my life to the fullest and make every second count: “‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). to now reemphasize what i aim to do, my mission is, in the most simple terms, to serve others. i will try my best to place others before myself, even when difficult or inconvenient. the main way i have chosen to serve others so far is through being a friend to everyone in my dorm. one of my best approaches to doing this has been working at my dorm restaurant, yaz’s. whenever we’re open at yaz’s, we get a huge portion of the dorm down there eating great food, talking with everyone else, and having a great time. as one of the employees, i get to serve everyone in the manor and make sure everything’s running smoothly. building on this, i also ran for vp of the dorm and won so i could do anything in my power to make this place better for everyone. while it’s great to have these formal positions to help, i also pride myself on going outside of that to be there for other people. whenever i’m around, people can count on me to be a true friend to all i encounter. i am a man who above all trusts in god and believes in the power of prayer (“week 12 qqc” by moreau fye week 12). with this love for god comes the immense love that god has for all of us; i sincerely hope that i will be able to do my part in extending that love across the world to as many people as i can. integration three remembering grace rina kayastha was a woman who led a satisfying life. she was born in grand rapids, michigan on october 3rd, 2003 with a full head of hair to kathleen pastore kayastha and sanjiv kayastha. after spending a bit of time in grand rapids and then san francisco, her family moved to niskayuna, new york where her brother would be born a few years later. as a child she liked to draw and dreamed of being a fashion designer, which was inspired by watching project runway with her mom. grace did gymnastics through elementary school and swimming through middle school. she was surrounded by all four of her grandparents for a majority of her childhood, and she was forever grateful for the delicious indian food her grandmother veena made and for the various rides to activities her grandfather john gave her. her grandparents were a large inspiration to her, and she always hoped to live lives like they did. in high school she was a leader on the tennis team, and enjoyed mentoring younger athletes. grace also transitioned from swimming to being a swim coach, and would spend her summers working at the mohawk club for several years. she joined the school orchestra as a violinist, and went on to play in the symphony orchestra and the pit orchestra for her high school’s production of little women. she also helped out at the school’s tutoring center and worked alongside the school’s librarian to help with the program itself. grace was always very passionate about helping other students improve not only their academic skills, but also their confidence in themselves (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). she had two best friends in high school named olivia reeves and isabel van der veen, and whenever she was with them she felt as though what the three of them had together was one of the most special things in the world (“tattoos on the heart chapter 6: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). she worked very hard through high school and graduated with high honors in 2021. for college she attended the gateway program through holy cross college and then spent three years as a full-time student at notre dame. grace was very happy to carry on the legacy of her mother and grandfather by attending notre dame. she went into college undecided in regards to her major and future career, but along the way she took classes she enjoyed and met people who had similar interests to her who helped her figure out her path (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). the gateway program was one of the best things to ever happen to her, and her freshman fall semester was one of the happiest times of her life. throughout college as a whole, however, she battled with mental health issues, but over time she was able figure out how to live life in a healthy and productive way (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six), and gathered the courage to ask for help when she needed it most. grace also gained a better understanding of how to balance school work, social life, and taking breaks (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). she enjoyed the ride and went on to major in psychology with double minors in digital marketing and anthropology, and graduated from the university of notre dame in 2025. after college grace moved to boston to begin her career, and she lived there for several years with her dog. she always enjoyed visiting her family back home, and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ frequently called her mom to talk about various things. she also kept in close contact with her two best friends from high school and several friends from college, and always looked forward to getting lunch with them whenever she was in the same town as them. she always wanted her friends to know that she was there for them, and that if they ever needed anything she was only a call away (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). after some time she moved to rhode island where she worked at brown university. there she was able to work during the weekdays and go to the beach in her free time. grace got married to an amazing man and together they moved to san francisco, where she was able to enjoy the places she frequented when she was only a baby, like fisherman’s wharf and the golden gate bridge, and continued on with her marketing career. she enjoyed art, and could often be found on the floor making something, surrounded by a mess of art supplies or on her ipad creating digital art. ever the creative person, she loved to incorporate this side of her into her marketing career. she loved music, and would occasionally attempt to learn a song from a movie on her violin, and though she could never perfect movie soundtracks, she enjoyed trying. grace also very frequently discussed issues that women of color face in america, but she found a way to turn her experiences into something that others could learn from, which allowed her to find joy in those experiences (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). she grew old with her husband doing the things she enjoyed, and she passed away naturally at the age of 92. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html eulogy commentary in the paragraph where i referenced the discernment activity, i specifically wanted to use that week because of what my friend said during our conversation. she mentioned that i was always willing to help others with studying and schoolwork, and i thought that this related well to my participation in tutoring during high school (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). next i thought about the quote “alone, they didn’t have much, but together, they had a potful of plenty,” and wanted to use this because my friends truly make me feel complete, and they have had such an important part in my life (“tattoos on the heart chapter 6: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). in my paragraph about college i first referenced the quote, “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes,” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i liked this quote for this part because i truly hope to get this out of college, and i think that eventually i will. next i thought about the quote, “asking why appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems… instead of moving forward in a healthy and productive way,” and i liked this because i hope to get better at moving on from my struggles in a healthier and more productive way (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). then i moved onto an idea from week one, and liked the quote, “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest… who most need to give themselves a break,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the next quote was one that i thought about for my post-college life, and that was, “his door was always open,” which was said about father hesburgh (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). now, and in the future, i always hope that my friends know that i would drop anything to help them, and that i am always there for them. finally, my last inspiration was, “she has such a gift for talking about really difficult things with joy,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i brought up this idea because, although i don’t necessarily talk about death with joy, i do try to apply this concept to other difficult things like experiences with racism. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html moreau final: capstone integration my mission of a life well-lived mission statement: as a student, friend, and daughter, my mission in life is to give back to others. in my life, i have come to be so appreciative of the simpler things in which i have learned to find joy in others' happiness. by playing more emphasis on the good and less on the creeping anxieties i face i learn to be more content with my life. as a child, i originally thought peak happiness came from receiving gifts from santa claus on christmas. however, as i got older i slowly discovered that finding happiness goes much deeper than any materialistic item could carry. i have learned to seek out this joy in giving rather than receiving. over the next years, i hope to continue to focus on what i can do for others rather than what they can do for me. another major component of being happy is living life in the present. it is imperative that we start “appreciating the present and focus on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). our death is inevitable. by acknowledging that there is no escape from this fate, we are forced to focus more on living in the moment rather than worrying about all the what-ifs in life. if we are so caught up in all the negativity in the world then we can never truly enjoy life to the fullest, living a proper life well lived. along with this, it is important for me to remember to not put so much pressure on myself in regard to my future. in our society there “seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path.” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week 4). we are told we need to have everything figured out at certain points in life, but that is simply not true. we need to stop putting so https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ much pressure on this idea that we need to know everything about our future. all we really need is to focus on what makes us happy and pursue that path in our journey and by doing so live a happier, more fulfilled life. i am at my worst when i am narrow-minded, when i place myself before others, when i disregard the feelings of the people around me in order to benefit my own desires. in my opinion, the convenience of being closed off to new ideas is what hinders us from branching out and confronting situations from all angles. when presented with an idea that challenges our own it is easy to retreat to your own personal way of thinking. society is honed in on this idea that we need to be constantly going making it difficult to actually take the time to analyze new ideas or beliefs. only when we step further back and stand “still we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i believe that i need to work on slowing down so that i do not get lost in the narrow-minded world that we live in. i am truly happy when i am able to bring joy to those around me. my happiness stems from being able to return a smile to someone's face. i am truly happy when i am surrounded by those who i love and care about. when i am surrounded by the people who motivate me to be a better person i am at my happiest. one of the most important aspects of my life is my family. growing up, i have always abided by our “family motto that delgado girls stick together meaning that no matter what obstacles we face we must always put each other first because at the end of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the day they are the people that are not going anywhere” (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). my sister has been my partner in crime ever since we were little. not only is she my sister, but she is also my best friend. there is not a single person in this world that could ever compare to her. we do absolutely everything together from replicating crumbl cookie recipes to binge-watching all of the harry potter movies. when we argue we make up in no less than five minutes. i would do anything for her and my mom. not only do they bring me happiness, but they push me to be the best version of myself. they believe in me even if i do not necessarily reciprocate that same belief. although with this i aspire to start believing in myself the way the believe in me instilling confidence into my life. i want to be the person that people think highly of. not in a superior way, but in a way that elicits respect. one in which people do not associate my name with negative connotations, but rather ones that show i was a good catholic who lived a life well-lived. throughout my life, i want people to remember me for being kind, respectful, and a good catholic. i want to make those around me proud and i too want to be proud of what i have done over the course of my life. i want to be able to look back at my life and be proud of living a life well-lived. additionally, i want to not be sucked into the world of echo chambers. echo chambers are “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). a largely growing problem amidst our society is “bubbles” and “echo chambers”. bubbles are dangerous because it is your behavior that filters what you are exposed to online creating a bubble around what you are constantly viewing. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1piyohhr47dcjjazszjlf3lynt0zgtrb_iemomepl2fi/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146603 however, echo chambers are worse in the sense that it entraps us into certain world views due to groups actively discrediting others' opinions. when groups begin to stop tolerating the opinions and views of others, then bubbles will turn into echo chambers. in order to prevent ourselves from being trapped in these things, we need to wholeheartedly try to understand other people’s opinions, keep track of our own personal motives, and make sure to take a step back and look at the bigger picture confirming that we are not falling into this dangerous world of bubbles and echo chambers. i want to work to combat these issues by eliminating them from my life and those around me in order to help prevent the spread of more “bubbles”. someday i would like to be able to release people from their suffering. i aspire to work in the medical field in which i can heal others through medicine. for years, i have grown up being told that we need to be the “voice for the voiceless” and that we need to speak up for those who can’t do it themselves. i have been under this false assumption for a long time. i have come to discover that instead “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,” but rather “the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergn moreau fye week 9). helping the less fortunate is not about being their voice, but rather it is about going out into the world to give these people back their voice so that there is no need to be their voice in the first place. solidarity is not a one-way street. it means that we are walking with a person. the relationship goes both ways in which each individual brings something to the table. with this in mind, i hope to be able to find someone with that i can engage in this process of accompaniment. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit my deepest positive emotions come from when i do small acts of kindness. it is the most meaningful to me when done without people knowing that i was the one responsible. or even when i bring a coffee to a friend who has had little time for sleep. just knowing that i can improve their day brings more than enough contentment to me. something that i always found rewarding was including others. for instance, when i was in elementary school playing with a group of friends, i saw a girl in my grade sitting all alone. all of the other kids were playing kickball or were running around the playground, but here she sat alone poking at a rock with a stick. immediately, my heart sunk as i imagine what it would be like to be in her shoes. i instantly walked over to her inviting her to come to play with my friends. i know what it is like to be left out so i always had made it my personal mission to never allow a person to feel that way. within the christian community, “one of the essential tests of social justice... is its abiding spirit of inclusion” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week 10). our duty as catholics is to welcome people no matter their race, gender, social status, etc. growing up we have been constantly reinforced with the saying “treat others the way you want to be treated,” but still people fail to abide by this simple rule. instead of judging others based on our differences, we should learn to be appreciative of them. society has honed in on this idea that we need to dress and look a certain way. individuality has become lost in the norms of today. this message also goes for not leaving people out whether it be purposeful or not. judgment and hatred break down the community prohibiting genuine and authentic connections from being formed. throughout the next years here at notre dame, i want to spread the gift inclusivity to demonstrate that it is the key to not only growing in our faith but also growing as a community. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ my greatest talent is being able to make someone laugh. when my friends are upset i know that the one thing i can do best in this world is to bring a little humor in to lighten the conversation. a sense of relief floods my body when i see their smiles return to their face. the gift of humor is something i believe i have been blessed with. i am probably the worst person to console a person when they are crying. i suddenly become awkward and tense because i always shut off all emotions from my peers so i do not show vulnerability. my mind starts to race to try to figure out a well-constructed sentence that will make them feel better, but my mind blanks. instead, i find a way to make a joke so awkward that they are forced to laugh reliving the pent-up tension. i always think of how i am incapable of comforting a sad or crying person, but what i fail to see is that by making them laugh i am in a sense comforting them. it is important to start focusing “on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by jihoon kim moreau fye week 6). i believe a lot of us fail to realize this sometimes. we can get so caught up in all the negative things and all the limitations in our lives that we forget to look at what we are actually capable of. this is an important lesson that i hope to be able to do in my lifetime because i too focus on how much i am not doing versus how much i can and have done for others. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ when all is said and done, the most important thing in life is our relationship with god. on earth, we have been sent on a mission to spread our faith. we have been called to be disciples of the lord as we all work towards a common goal: heaven. as disciples, we abide by the rules of the catholic church professing the faith to all we encounter. additionally, the church functions as a singular body working on the mission of making it to heaven. each of us has been given a calling in life, whether it be “those who go out to work or those whose labors sustain the community itself, those in the fullness of their strength and those held back by sickness or by age, those who abide in the companionship of a local house and those sent to live and work by themselves, or those in their active assignments and those who are still in training” (“constitution of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week 12). the church is composed of many different parts, but all together we compose one singular body. we are each endowed with a set of gifts given to us by god that are meant to be shared with the community. like these unique gifts, we also have specific missions in our life already planned by god. we are all different functioning groups that work as a united force striving to achieve the ultimate goal of heaven. if we are all trying to achieve the same goal, why is there so much conflict in our lives? why do we put so much emphasis on always being right and maintaining a singular point of view? life is encompassed at crossroads in which “the differences of culture, religion and conviction can coexist with friendship, civility, hospitality and especially love '' (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). i hope to reduce strife between my friends and family because at the end of the day small disagreements hold no value. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 a life goal for me is to be more courageous. to be willing to continue along the journey despite the possibility of failure. to act with courage being open to taking on intellectual risks. because without courage how will i be able to make my mark on the world? (“activity: complete: writing a personal mission statement activity” moreau fye week 13) i believe that the two most important virtues in life are hope and courage. courage is imperative in order for us to overcome the odds. it is what allows us to renounce the fear of failure and pursue challenges head-on. hope on the other hand “does not mean to be optimistically naïve and ignore the tragedy humanity is facing. hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow. hope is the door that opens onto the future” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i used to believe that hope was something that we had to disregard the issues we face in the world and naively wish for things to be better. rather it means that we need to acknowledge these things, but know that there is always another day that we can go out and make a difference in this world. it also does not require every single person, but rather one person that can ignite a cascade of events sparking hope in others. another interesting observation was the comparison of hope being a small light that can overcome the darkness. this reminded me of how jesus was sent into the world to be the light against the darkness. we refer to jesus as being the light of the world since when we follow him we are pulled out from the dark and into the light. if i am hopeful and courageous i believe that i can thoroughly achieve a life well-lived. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ angel gonzalez rodriguez maria finan moreau first-year experience 04 march 2022 lived it. loved it. farewell beautiful life. i understand that you, my loved ones, are saddened with my departure from this world. it was god’s will for me to join him now in heaven, and there was nothing anyone could ever do to prevent that from happening. because nothing can overcome his will. instead, i ask that my life as well as all i accomplished, experienced, and learned may be celebrated. i am satisfied with what i achieved during my lifetime, but one could say i lived my life in dissatisfaction. now you may be asking yourself, how is this possible? to answer this question, i’d like to mention a quote from fr. michael himes that really stuck with me throughout my life: “[st.] augustine also noted, ‘dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us.’ it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing” (“three key questions” moreau fye week three). in my eyes, dissatisfaction is the catalyst for our endless pursuit of success and happiness because, while we may find ourselves content whenever we make progress towards that success and that happiness, we know in the back of our minds that there’s still more work to be done. hence, we keep on pushing ourselves even further. and as many of you can attest to, i did just that. those of you who went to school with me in healdsburg, ca know why i was so insistent on finishing among the top dogs in my class. i wanted to make my family proud. to set myself up for success in the future. to counter age-old ethnic stigmas and prove that a mexican is just as good as a white person in america. and thanks to the constant support of my family, friends, teachers and coaches, i accomplished all of that. but by no means did it stop there. in december of my senior year of high school, i was accepted to the university of notre dame on a full scholarship. that’s right. the son of mexican immigrants who was excelling in school in the face of adversity suddenly became healdsburg’s hometown hero. it felt great to know that the entirety of my hometown now had my back as i finished high school and began to prepare for a new chapter of my life that awaited me in indiana. however, in all honesty, i did have a little bit of doubt nestled in the back of my mind. i thought about how notre dame had always been predominantly white and how it was a private institution; as a graduate of a public school whose student body was about half white and half latino, i was afraid i’d have a bit of a hard time getting used to life on campus. but, as i came to learn, “notre dame’s a crossroads, where all the intellectual and moral currents of our times meet and dialogue. a place where all of the burning issues that affect the church and the world today are plumbed to their depths in an atmosphere of faith. where differences of culture and religion, conviction can coexist with friendship and civility, and even love” (fr. theodore hesburgh, csc in hesburgh moreau fye week two). there may have been a bit of a culture shock upon my arrival, but the relationships i formed with friends, professors, and other faculty members quickly dissipated my doubts and fears. i met people from many different walks of life and learned so many things academic and non-academic, religious and non-religious and because of this i always felt a strong sense of belonging at the university during my time there. once i got settled in at notre dame, i began to regain my catholic faith something that was a little shaky growing up. as a busy college student with few breaks in his schedule, i identified very closely with the following quote from dr. jihoon kim: “i may not be able to spend the many, many hours to pray [sic] to god, but i will use these five minutes to not just pray for myself. [but] i could pray for others, i could pray for my loved ones, and i will utilize these five minutes and do something about it instead of focusing on what i cannot do” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). with the grotto of our lady of lourdes being just a short walk away, i began to set aside time to visit so i could light a candle and pray before exams or during times of hardship. i also began observing the sabbath, although not in a traditional manner. for many of us, the sabbath is “the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda, as through the light-filled passageways of notre dame [de paris] [...] it’s like a retreat house that ensures we’ll have something bright and purposeful to carry back into the other six days” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). while i didn’t take the entirety of sundays off to observe the sabbath, i ensured that mass (be it in my dorm or in the basilica of the sacred heart) was factored into my sunday schedule. worship and prayer allowed me to establish a greater connection with god, and that brought some peace and stability to my life. sometimes i felt stressed and sometimes overwhelmed with the task i had at hand, and there seemed to be no end in sight; however, stepping away and talking to god, even if it was just for five minutes, allowed me to clear my mind and nourish my soul and return to my work more relaxed than i had been before. i regained and fortified my faith during my time at notre dame, but there was more to my experience than just the religious aspect of it. i had a vast array of interests growing up, which made it difficult for me to decide on what i wanted to pursue a career in. there were all sorts of careers with which i would fill in the blank of what i wanted to be when i grew up, from doctor to firefighter to professional soccer player to president of the united states. it wasn’t until my freshman year of high school that i began to more or less define the career path i wanted to pursue: engineering. but even that came with its fair share of doubt, as i wasn’t sure whether i wanted to be a mechanical, civil, environmental, or aerospace engineer. this doubt ended up following me onto the notre dame campus, and it was here that i learned that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process. contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). once i did my research, i decided to major in civil engineering because it took advantage of my two greatest strengths: mathematics and hands-on labor. but that doesn’t mean i got rid of my other interests; if anything, i nourished them. as a devout soccer aficionado, i watched games when i could and played for my dorm’s interhall team each of my four years; as a social person, i got to spend lots of time with my friends, both in and outside of st. edward’s hall; and as a poet, i wrote romantic poems to my crush back home to say the least, she loved each and every one of them. when i looked back on it all upon graduating, i was glad that my major didn’t define how i lived my non-academic life. my roommate during my freshman year at notre dame once told me that “to live a life well-lived, one has to remain true to their ideals and give it their all in the pursuit of what makes them happy” (from reflection activity moreau fye week five). that’s what i want to be remembered for: for always giving it my all, be it in the classroom, in the workplace, or on the soccer field, so that i could become the best i could possibly be. for loving and caring about those around me. for always putting my family my relatives and close friends before anyone and anything else. for always standing up for, and doing, what is right. for being kind and humble and tender. yes, tender. why? because, as his holiness pope francis put it, tenderness is about “being on the same level as the other. god himself descended into jesus to be on our level. this is the same path the good samaritan took. this is the path that jesus himself took. he lowered himself, he lived his entire human existence practicing the real, concrete language of love. yes, tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted conferences moreau fye week seven). i was always tender in that i knew how to identify with everyone who was a part of my life at one point or another, be it through a shared success, failure, experience, or background. sure, i was always confident and had a bit of an ego (the good kind) to my personality, but i set all of that aside to lend a helping hand to those who needed it because, for all i knew, they could do the same for me at some point further down the line. this was my life, a life-well lived: with many ambitions and many people to support me in my pursuit of them. with this, i state that this, my funeral, is not a final goodbye. it’s only a “see you soon,” for we will all be reunited soon in heaven. thank you, and may god bless you all wherever life may take you. spring moreau integreationfinal 27 april, 2022 prof. whittington moreau capstone integration a force for good in the world the mission of my life is to use my time and talents to make a difference in my local community and the world. my mission of serving others is inspired by catholic beliefs, in which i believe i have so much to give to help the lives of others. while my goal is to give of myself to others, i also strive to learn as much as i can from those around me. as humans, we are all flawed, yet the different insights and perspectives that each individual possesses can help me to become a better person. it is essential that i do not become stagnant in my pursuit of becoming a better person and serving others. improving myself and serving others can often be difficult, particularly difficult physically, emotionally, and intellectually. however, i must not run away from challenges. confronting difficult situations will help me to learn and improve as a person. as i accumulate knowledge and growth within my catholc faith, it is my responsibility to pass down what i have learned to future generations. passing down my knowledge and inspiring others is critical in ensuring that our world continues to become a better place. through refusing to give up, consulting my faith in my decisions, and having faith in humanity, i will make a positive impact and fulfill my purpose in the world. a good life is one that is informed by knowledge, and guided by principle. as a person, it is essential that i be a lifelong learner. the world is always changing and adapting, i must continue to learn about these changes so i can contribute. despite all of these changes, i must remain firm in my principles which are guided by my catholic faith. one of the core fundamentals of catholic teaching is love. through my actions, i must demonstrate that i am loving my neighbors. there are many people in society who feel marginalized, and it questions them to cause their own self worth and standing with god. this idea was stated concisely by grotto magazine that sometimes people do not think god loves them because they fail to love themselves (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week ten). i will work towards giving of my time and talents towards others, and my contributions to others will hopefully make everyone realize that they are loved. even simple acts of kindness such as starting a conversation can really brighten someone's days. oftentimes, our society marginalizes groups of people. it is these marginalizations which can make people feel like they have less or little self worth. this semester i was really moved by the words of marcus cole at the notre dame law school, “i am a lawyer, a law professor, and dean of one of the nation’s leading law schools” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus colemoreau fye week twelve). this statement was incredibly powerful coming from someone who comes from a background of discrimination. i have been privledged to not experience the types of discrimination or marginzaltion that many others have faced. when i think about these instances, i will often ask myself, “why them and not me?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye spring week seven). instances of marginalization have gone on for far too long, and through giving of myself, i can help create a society in which the next generation does not have to ponder this question. despite my efforts and the efforts of others to make our world a better place, there are many times when life can be difficult. sometimes all i do is focus on the difficulties that i am facing. this very much echoes the idea that aria swarr presents, “when hardships or unexpected things happen, we often focus on the things we don't have” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye spring week six). https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 despite any difficulties that i am facing, i know that i have been loved by others, and i have love to give myself. love and friendships are two of the most important things in life. through giving of my life, time, and love, i can help people feel improved and achieve their goals just like marcus cole. while my goal of empowering inspires me, it is imperative that i do not become stagnant in my pursuit. in order to continue my pursuit, i must constantly diversify my surroundings. being around the same people constantly could create an echo chamber, making me deaf to the real issues going on around in our world (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week eleven). in many instances, i will not be able to leave my community, family, and occupation to go elsewhere and provide service. therefore, there are many ways in which i can diversify my service and friendships within my community. this can be as simple as creating a conversation with someone from my parish who i have never spoken to before. their input and thoughts can be inspiring and enlightening. while i seek to improve the lives of others, individuals will in return enrich my life through our interactions. this idea is something that steve reifenberg learned while he was serving in chile, that interactions in life are truly mutually beneficial (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine”). steve echoes the idea that we need to not treat others as strangers who we do not want to associate with, but we should approach others with optimism. surrounding myself with all types of people within my community will ensure i do not become stagnant in mission. while it may seem that i have a solid grasp in following the ideals of my mission, as any other human, i struggle a lot. this year has been a year of change and struggle. i get very stressed over my classes, and as a pre-med student, my courses have really required a lot of my https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit time. my one regret about this year is that i sometimes let the stress control me. instead of striking up conversations with friends, i would often just go and study. i worry about failing, and it often seems that getting grades is the only way i can succeed in life. however, the career center at notre dame does remind us that “contrary to popular belief, your major does not determine the rest of life” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye spring week four). going forward, i need to listen to the advice of the career center. i must put my goals of enriching myself and the lives of others over the stress induced habits that i have developed. despite these failures, my brother has stressed to me that “failure is a process of growth” (“discernment conversation activity” by kyle thompsonmoreau fye spring week five). my failures this year have been lessons, and in the future i can be more aware about how stress influences my life. however, i do believe that success within my major can lead me to helping others. i would like to be a pediatrician, and i believe i can provide great inputs and advice to help families. i would like to remind my patients that “stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye spring week one). therefore, i can help the lives of others, by advising them not to let stress control them like it has controlled me at times. living out my mission can be difficult, but confronting these challenges is how i can grow and develop as a person. despite these many obstacles, i often remember that i will only be alive for a limited amount of time. i find sister theresa aletheia noble’s famous reminder to be very inspiring, “remember your death” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye spring week three). i must make the most amount of positive change possible with my life. as i make a difference and learn about the lives of others, i will be able to pass down what i have learned to future generations. our world can often tempt https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q4nnjvvykxuwshj-kdpvzzeoy0mlrvpmshgcuuhwrls/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q4nnjvvykxuwshj-kdpvzzeoy0mlrvpmshgcuuhwrls/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html us to be selfish about our goals, but i wish to pass down the reminder that father hesburgh has passed down to my generation, “there comes a time in life…where moral righteousness is more important than victory” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye spring week two). the time for moral righteousness is now, and i must help the next generation to understand that. my mission statement embodies my sense of moral righteousness, as i believe that i need to use my gifts to be a force for good in the world. while it can be difficult to always follow my morals, i am committed to making a conscious effort on a daily basis to improve myself and the world around me. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau capstone integration moreau fye 4/27/2022 carrying out the murphy mission as my first year at notre dame comes to an end, i am satisfied with how i have begun to grow as a person. i have discovered subjects that interest me, met people i have come to know as friends, and most importantly, i have begun to plan my future. there is so much that i want to accomplish in this world as a student as well as after graduation. to do this, as i have learned over the course of these two semesters, it takes conviction and dedication to one’s mission. as an institution, notre dame “is dedicated to the pursuit and sharing of truth for its own sake” in addition to many other responsibilities (“university of notre dame mission statement” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 13). in much of the same way, i have my own responsibilities and obligations that i have used to craft my following mission statement: as a student, my mission is to learn as much as i can in these four years and apply my knowledge towards helping others and improving the world. i want to make sure that i use my experience as an engineer to make a difference in the world and improve lives for everyone around me. as a son, my mission is to take care of my parents just like they have taken care of me for these past two decades. i want to ensure that they have a great life after retirement and that i can provide them with everything that they need. as a friend, my mission is to make sure that i can be there for the people that i surround myself with and ensure that they never feel alone. additionally, i want to be a source of positivity in their lives and ensure that they can benefit from having me in their lives the same way that i benefit from them being in my life. in the future, my mission is to always be the best version of myself that i can be and continue to always work and grow in all facets of my life. i want my kids to one day be able to look up to me as a role model. i broke down my mission for my next three years into four different roles: my role as a student, as a son, as a friend, and as my future self. i plan to carry out this mission in the best ways possible and ensure that i accomplish who i want to be on this planet. as a student, i want to ensure that i set aside time for myself to relax and recharge during these next three years. i have come to learn over the past couple of months how important rest is for me as a student and i want to make it a mission to give myself the off-time i need over the next three years. as humans, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” and i want to https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ ensure that i am listening to what i truly need (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). furthermore, as a pupil in the coming years, i want to expand my network and become better friends with those that i am going to be studying with. similar to the way that father hesburgh made friends with everyone around him and held no enemies during his life, i want to be friends with all of those that share the same interests as me. during the civil rights movement, he even stated “i’ve made friends with soldiers on both sides. i just don’t want to see my friends dead” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). while as a student my friendships might not be as integral as the ones father hesburgh made, i still want to be a well connected student in the future. as a student, i also want to pursue subjects and topics that i enjoy learning about and that motivate me to be the best student that i can be at all times. as i have discerned over this past year, engineering is definitely the field that i want to pursue because of the joy that it brings me. for me, mechanical engineering is an “impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open ones talents even more widely than one had before” (“meet the nun that wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i cannot wait to continue on my education mission over the next three years and continue learning about what i love. as a son, i want to provide my parents with the same experience and care that they offered me when i was growing up. i feel like a lot of sons and daughters do not appreciate what their parents do for them enough and they think that one action of gratitude towards their parents is “just checking a box and moving on” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). what i mean by this is that people think that simply thanking their parents is enough to repay them for everything that they have sacrificed for you to have the best life possible. i want to make sure that i can take care of them the way that they took care of me. as a son, i also want to be conscious of what i am like within the context of my family. i feel like there are times where i am separating who i am around my friends with who i am around my family and it makes me feel like i am being an inauthentic person. since “there is a lot you do not understand about yourself until people point it out,” i want my parents to be able to help me be a better son and person in general (“week 5 qqc” by moreau week five). in continuance with this theme, as a son, i also want to be able to reflect on myself and my role within the family. what this means is periodically taking time to be introspective and assess how i have been as a member of my family. i want to make it my mission to understand that “the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). in order to be https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/assignments/49146?module_item_id=143014 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/143033 the most helpful person i can be to others, i must first master how to reflect on and understand my own being. as a friend, i want to be there for those i consider to be the closest people in my life at all times. additionally, i want to be able to do everything that i can to help them out in every way possible and simply be the best friend that they could ever ask for. i feel as though recently i have become more detached from my lifelong friends back home, so i want to make it my mission “to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). as a friend, i also want to be able to relate with everyone around me and form some form of meaningful relationships with every individual that i can. in my eyes, “we are only as impactful in changing the world as the relationships we make with others” so it is essential that i become a friend to as many people as i possibly can (“integration 3 ” by nolan murphy moreau fye week eight). my mission in the next years at notre dame is to truly expand my network of friends and be friendly to everyone that i possibly can. as a friend, i also want to be as inclusive and understanding as possible. this will require me to have a lot of empathy but i want to ensure that those around me feel as comfortable as possible even though i might not be able to fully understand their situation. i want to be a companion to others and promote “the idea that [i am] working to help people ‘over there,’ in recognition of the fact that ‘over there’ and ‘here’ are intertwined”, or in other words, realize that when i help others and befriend them, we are link that connects the human race as a whole (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). in the future, i want to make myself more available to the ones that i hold close to me, whether it be family or friends. i have sort of realized that i have become much more closed off recently and i want my future to include everyone that i hold close to my heart. week 10’s material closely relates to this and the idea “i started to pay more attention to my friendships, and realized that i had become guarded and shallow in all of them” unknowingly (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). additionally, i want for my future self to be wiser and more aware of the social dangers around me. what i am really worried about is the potential for my future self to become too close minded and stubborn. i have learned about echo chambers and how “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” and i worry that i may subconsciously fall into one (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i want to make it my mission to avoid falling into traps like these that could turn me into a close minded person. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/assignments/49079 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s finally, in the future, i want to be courageous and unwavering in the face of the inevitable challenges that i will have to deal with. for me, this includes using my own voice and conviction to be the change that i want to witness in the world. additionally, i want to make it part of my mission that if i witness injustice “and i can do something. i must do something” to help prevent it (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something'” by dean g marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). overall, i hope that i can use what i have learned over these past couple of months and start working towards the mission i have outlined for myself over the next couple of years. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ capstone integration gardes1 andrew whittington moreau fye 29 april 2022 finding fulfillment by walking with others i will help others because i have realized that giving is just as, if not more, important than receiving. in my personal and professional life, i can use my abilities to help those around me rather than keep them to myself. i will be compassionate. i will be selfless. most importantly, i will be satisfied knowing that i have lived a good life because i will have lived a life full of service to others. in our last moreau class of the year, we were asked to start the process of refining our mission statement. i realized that my previous– and much longer– mission statement embodied one main idea: i want to live my life benefiting others. i attended a very small, private, catholic, all-girls school my entire life: ages 1 to 18. this environment, while it fostered some invaluable friendships, set each person up to be in constant competition with one another. it was hard to differentiate yourself, so it was easy to be selfish and to simply keep your talents and gifts to yourself. however, i found myself in a new environment, one that “pursues its objectives through the formation of an authentic human community graced by the spirit of christ” (“university of notre dame mission statement” week 13). since arriving at notre dame, i have realized that life is so much more fulfilling when you share what you have with others: share in the highs and lows of life, share opportunities, share talents, share smiles, laughs, and tears. with this realization, i reformulated my mission statement to embody this message of sharing, giving, and compassion because it is exactly how i want to orient my life. i believe that in order to accomplish my mission statement, i need to take action. it is nearly impossible to help others if you are solitary and reclined. i believe that i have an obligation to work with others, and “reach out to the afflicted and in a preferential way to the https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ gardes2 poor and the oppressed… as their neighbors, to be with them and of them” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by holy cross week 12). in order to make actual change, i need to walk with those i am helping, not in front of them. this makes my mission statement action basedacting on conviction, morals, and justice. to make my mission statement more achievable, i have identified three places to focus my efforts. first, i believe i need to identify and become my true self. i next want to identify and address the needs of those around me. lastly, i want to learn how to act in solidarity with others when helping. if i can achieve these goals, i believe that i will have achieved my mission statement, and, thus, a life well-lived. identifying and becoming my true self is a hard task but one that i have already begun. i have come to realize that the time i spend alone with my thoughts is when i can best sort through how i am feeling and what i want. pico iyer noted that “the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer week 1). i believe that “sitting still” simply means sitting with your thoughts, and people have many different ways of doing this: meditation, prayer, or, like me, walking. being able to reflect independently, without the interference of others’ thoughts and opinions, helps me recognize my potential; it gives me the opportunity to ask myself “what” questions instead of “why” as “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich week 6). these questions are more productive, and they help me dive deeper into my personal feelings rather than into situational influences on my views. on these walks, i have come to understand my growth throughout these past few months, appreciate those around me, and discern my views on issues present in my community. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ gardes3 one of my most valuable realizations that i have made in these moments of thought is that i am meant to be at this university. i am from new orleans, and it is rare that someone ventures off to the north rather than lsu, alabama, or ole miss. people doubted my abilities, saying that i was just accepted to “diversify the class.” however, i have been pleasantly surprised by how wrong those people were. i have not only been successful academically, but i have grown to be a more compassionate, giving, and open minded person just in one year here. as father hesburg mentioned, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley week 2). there is no doubt i have encountered failings– failing my first quiz in god and the good life, letting my friends down on occasion, and having my priorities get distorted from time to time. each of these failings, in conjunction with my successes, has helped me realize the person i want to be, and that is essential in order to even begin to attempt to achieve my mission statement. this is the first, and potentially the hardest, step of achieving my mission, but it is crucial. i cannot truly make a tangible change in others’ lives if i have not discerned my own path. i need to find what brings me joy and fulfillment as “joy always pushes us forward” (“three key questions” by fr. michael hines week 3). on top of this, finding myself is the most individualistic step, meaning that others will not yet see how i am living out my mission of helping those in need. however, with discerning my own path, i will be able to use my gifts to the fullest extent possible to make positive changes in the world around me. the next area i intend on focusing on is identifying and addressing the needs of those around me. in order for me to be able to effectively and tangibly help people around me, i need to discern who i have direct contact with. weeks 4 and 5 of moreau classes really focused on https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 gardes4 orienting ourselves to our future desires and impacts. i plan on becoming a doctor, meaning that the people i can most influence are my patients and my coworkers. in this area of work, it is essential to “actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo career center week 4). being some form of doctor has visible evidence of how i help others, but i aim to help on a deeper level. i want to be there for my patients, help them through the process, and show that i care about them as people, not as a source of income. in my conversations with my grandmother for week 5 of moreau, she noted that it was clear to her that “i want to change the world by being of service to others,” and it is precisely that; i want to use my knowledge and skills to help improve the lives of others so that they, too, can find their joys and fulfillment in life. the last area of my life i wish to emphasize in order to achieve my mission statement is learning how to act in solidarity with others when helping. one concept that was really highlighted over the semester was accompaniment, and it truly resonated with me. i realized that the goal of reaching out to those around us means that we must “help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg week 9). i believe that sometimes our true intentions get confused when we begin helping others; we start to focus on our changes rather than why we want to make changes and who the changes are actually for. this made me sit back and reflect on why i wanted to be a doctor. did i convince myself i wanted to do this just for the money? do i think i am capable of making a difference in this field? am i even interested in medicine? even though my reflection resulted in the conclusion that i did in fact want to be in the medical field, my intentions shifted a little. i want to be a part of this community where i can use my interest in stem, my hands-on skills, and my love of human connection to follow the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit gardes5 wishes of my patients. i can give all of my best advice, but at the end of the day, i want to do whatever my patient and i agree on as the best choice of action to help “take their destiny in their own hands.” in doing so, i will be able to foster valuable, authentic relationships, which is important because “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis week 7). it is hard to work in solidarity with others when you don’t have real, meaningful interactions with the people around you, and that is my driving force in my career plans and in my current life. while i have plans for the future as to how to achieve my goals of assessing the needs of those around me and acting in solidarity to address those needs, it is also important that i start working on these goals now. an area that i have identified to work on is being more open-minded. i was gifted with many privileges in my life, most of which i have taken for granted. starting to use these privileges to benefit others is how i can start this process now; i want to be more “willing to tolerate the discomfort associated with an honest appraisal and discussion of our internalized superiority and racial privilege,” and never shy away from hearing the experiences of others who have had different experiences than myself (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robert d’angelo week 10). this will not only help me to become a better doctor in the future, it will also help me foster connections with my community now. i can do this by exposing myself to academic conversations in my classes, especially the smaller, more discussion based classes where people express their personal experiences and opinions. these discussions can help reveal the true needs of those around me and prompt action because “anger, righteous anger and emotion, are [feelings] you leverage into action” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh week 11). if i don’t use my internal feelings in conjunction with the feelings and experiences of those around me to take action, there is no real https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/diangelo https://docs.google.com/diangelo https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ gardes6 point of even trying to connect with others. i must act with conviction, with confidence, and in solidarity with others. that is the ultimate goal. there is no doubt that achieving my mission statement to the fullest extent will be a challenge, but there will be no greater reward than doing so. this mission statement is everything. it is growing into myself. it is realizing my potential. it is realizing the potential of those around me. it is addressing the needs of those around me. it is helping others with intention. it is accompaniment. most of all, it is how i want to live my life because it asks of me what i would ask of those around me: to live my life serving others by utilizing my privilege, skills, and passions. moreau capstone integration 4/27/22 1 professor chan moreau fye 27 april 2022 a life well lived my first year at notre dame has been filled with many unforgettable moments for me. i have met many amazing people, had many great experiences, and learned a lot about myself. throughout this semester of the moreau fye, i have been asked to think about what i define as a life well lived. the weeks of content i have taken in along with experiences before college have shaped what i thought this to be. i began thinking deeply about the purpose of my life during my senior year of high school when i was told that i was the class valedictorian and had been accepted into the university of notre dame. i never imagined myself as a changemaker. i thought that it was other’s jobs to make changes in the world, but at that moment, i saw myself as a changemaker. i was an example of a successful black man in a world that expects me to be the opposite. my hard work during those past four years paid off and made me an exceptional role model. dean g. marcus cole’s story about his father is a perfect example of america’s view on people of color. he shares that when he was young, his father was taken out of his car and beaten by a group of white men. it was a saddening story to hear, but shows how people who look like me are seen and treated. father hesburgh’s story also told me that this is what god has intended for my life. father hesburgh was truly the embodiment of a life well lived whether it was through his 2 participation in the civil rights movement or his work to expand the perspectives of his students at notre dame. watching his story and how god was present in every step of his life showed me that being a role model for the next generation of young, black children is my purpose (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). being connected with the world through god’s creation is an important aspect to a life well-lived. it is easy to become disconnected from the world through the abundance of technology we are surrounded by. sometimes, it is seemingly impossible to step away from our screens because of the many uses we have for them. pico iyer shares the importance of slowing down our lives by stepping away from screens with the quote, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas… really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i liked this quote because it shows how our devices can expose us to so much content at once and distract us from all life has to offer. it states that we should take a step away from them in order to gain a full understanding of what our lives mean. this is an ideology i intend to implement for the rest of my life and will likely become increasingly important because of technology’s tendency to continuously grow without signs of subsiding. pico iyer’s ideas previously discussed can also tie into the practice of memento mori. to practice memento mori is to be mindful that you will die one day. it is meant to encourage https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ 3 maximizing every day. it ties into pico iyer’s idea because both are based on working to help people make the most of their lives. i initially thought of the practice as morbid, but its overall purpose is important and what i believe is part of a life well lived (“meet the nun who wants to remind you that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). in college, i questioned the truth in the statement that money does not bring happiness. in our society, money grants access to anything and everything one might need or want. this makes the statement difficult to believe because if one has money, they can do the things they enjoy even if it was earned doing a job they do not enjoy. it could also be argued that because we spend so much time at work, it is better to do something you enjoy than something you do not. the career development center and the discernment conversation activity from week five helped me decide how this applies to me. for me, i sometimes do not enjoy what i learn in school, but i believe that with a mechanical engineering degree, i will be able to do what i enjoy. through the conversation i had with my sister, i found this to be working on cars. with this in mind, i have decided to continue pursuing a mechanical engineering degree in order to eventually reach my end goal (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau fye week five). part of why my mission statement involves getting an education is because i believe that knowledge is power. dr. paul blaschko’s discussion of echo chambers and how they form was important because it shows how false assumptions about groups of people can form, such as racial stereotypes. if a group that thinks negatively of people of color forms, they will likely exclude people who think otherwise and only include like-minded individuals. it also ties into https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit 4 robin diangelo’s discussion of why it is difficult to talk to white people about racial issues. in it, he states that white people are shielded from what black people are subjected to in america. these two ideas stress the importance of gaining knowledge because it is only through knowledge that people can begin to understand the perspectives of others. we can then begin to help people in need (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten) (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). an important piece to a life well-lived is to spread love. i know from experience that receiving hugs and being told that someone loves you from friends and family is all it takes to improve a person’s mood. when i think about spreading love, i think about steve reifenberg’s story to south america. he had intended to improve the lives of children who stayed in an orphanage, but during his time he got sick. the children cared for him and did what they could for him. it was an amazing display of love and shows how important it is to care for people in our world today. if he had not received their care, he could have turned out substantially worse than he did. it is important in a mission to spread love that we do not give up on people because everyone is capable of changing. this is shown in father greg boyle’s story when gato felt regret after he said he was glad flaco was hit by a car. even though the two are enemies, gato still showed that he was for flaco’s best interests in an unfortunate time for him (“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). the last piece to a life well-lived is to be introspective. i am personally very introspective because it allows me to understand who i am and what i would like to change about myself. this https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007/download?download_frd=1 5 can go for others as well. sometimes, however, i find that being too introspective can sometimes weigh me down because it exposes the faults in my character without giving much attention to the good parts of it. tasha eurich taught me that this is an example of being too introspective and that a more effective way of being introspective is to ask what instead of why. for example, instead of asking why i am upset about something, i can ask what i am feeling so that i can properly identify a solution to the problem (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i liked her way of introspective thinking because i always thought that asking why is better at arriving at the root of the problem, but it actually is not. whenever i think introspectively, i will work on changing the structure of the questions i ask myself in order to gain a new perspective on the issue. the moreau fye has given me the opportunity to step away from the business of my intense major-related courses and ponder what is going on inside of myself. it has been an insightful year full of advice that i intend to implement over the next three years of my college career. whenever i am faced with an issue of morality, i will look back on what i defined as a life well lived and ask if it aligns with this definition. even beyond college, i intend to have each step i take be one that is mindful of what god’s will for my life is. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ life well-lived integration moreau due 4/29/22 life is uncertain…eat dessert first my freshman year feels like it’s flown by, and i am now left with only three more years of my collegiate life. it is my hope and my mission to make the most of that time, to pursue a life well-lived through my actions and choices. such a life is not an end goal or a moment in time, but the manner in which i act that allows me to achieve the best, most generous, patient, brave version of myself for the benefit of both myself those i spend time with. as i established in my mission statement, i want “to lean into growth and change, making the most of my opportunities and blessings” (my mission statement – moreau fye week 13). as early as week three this semester, we were urged to reflect on the finitude of time. sister aletheia urges us to “remember [our] death” in her interview with ny times (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). it seemed odd to me at the time that we would be asked to remember something that hasn’t happened yet, but i now understand the quote differently. i think, in fact, that we are being asked to acknowledge our mortality. the inevitability of our death is not something to mourn, but a reason to celebrate the time we do have alive. i am in a class about ancient greek literature this semester, and a prevalent theme throughout the books is the relationship between the gods and humans: one of jealousy on the former’s part, more often than not. we’ve speculated in class that this is because the immortality of the gods detracts from the meaning of their lives, and i am grateful, in many ways, that i am pressured by the limit of my time here to make the most of it. i thought about this, moreover, when i wrote my eulogy for integration three. the central question of that assignment was asking how i want to be remembered, and this remains a question for me now. back in week 8, i defined my ideal legacy as “someone who knew how to make people laugh, who expressed her love of those around her and her awe of the beauty of the world” (my eulogy – moreau fye week 8), and i believe this rings true still. the biggest task, then, is to live this legacy each day; speaking one’s truth is nothing without action. unquestionably, the most important part of my life are the people in it – my friends, family, and those who make up the larger communities i am in. i do not trust that i would be the same person without those i love. when i interviewed my father as part of my discernment process, he asserted that “community is essential for [me]” (chris jennings interview – moreau fye week 5), and i know that i will gravitate toward strong communities for the rest of my life. additionally, i aim to be someone who fosters a strong community around me, and my investment in my dorm community of cavanaugh hall is proof of that. i am immensely proud of our accomplishment of winning women’s hall of the year this year, and i think much of that is due to the culture we each contribute to – one of inclusivity, love, and spirit. as du lac https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html establishes, “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame flows from our character as a community of scholarship, teaching, learning, and service founded upon jesus christ” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” – moreau fye week 10). the university’s goal to be a force for good in the world is what attracted me to it when i was choosing a college, and i intend to embody that mission throughout my academic career here and post-graduation. i have been reminded of, both by dean cole’s letter in moreau and by other sources in my csc class, the work that must still be done in order for this school to reach its full potential. cole writes that “that could have been my father. that could have been me” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” – moreau fye week 12). this striking similarity between the tragic experience of george floyd and the experience of so many others, including members of this campus and school community, is powerful and agonizing. in coming to college, i’ve encountered a multitude of perspectives, it’s become important to remember father hesburgh’s words: “people of goodwill can disagree” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2). i strongly believe that the value of friendship comes not from similarity but from a care for the other. this is corroborated by the ted talk by pope francis, in which he proclaims that “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). i am grateful for the interactions i’ve had on this campus – both the casual ones, and the deeper conversations that i’ve participated in. just this morning, i was talking with two friends about the role of religion and spirituality in our lives, as this is something we are each working to define. our phones were away, in line with kelly’s urging “to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1), and it was such a satisfying and thought-provoking conversation. a few weeks ago, we watched a video by dr. paul blaschko, and he defined echo chambers as “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. blaschko – moreau fye week 11). the effects of functioning only within ideological bubbles are counterproductive, both to my understanding of the world and my ability to interact with others, and i seek to continue to engage in conversations that challenge my perspective and fulfill me. in tandem to the essentiality of strong community in my life, i strive to live in a manner consistent with reifenberg’s reflection on faith traditions: “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by prof. reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). this attitude of acceptance and empathy is important in interacting with a variety of people, each with unique backgrounds and valuable insights. i know that my career goals and plans will continue to change; after all, dr. donald super describes our career discernment as a “developmental process that spans a person’s entire https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit lifetime” on the undergraduate career services page (“navigating your career journey” – moreau fye week 4), but the person i aim to become is independent of my professional pursuits. ironic though it may be, considering a mission statement is for the future, i believe that the best action i can take to live out my ideals is to remain grounded with a present focus. as dr. eurich explains in the ted article from week 6, “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd – moreau fye week 6). this quote points to the importance of living in the moment, for that is the only way to make the most of our time. i know the next three years will go by just as fast as this one has, and there will continue to be changes to adjust to and challenges to face. however, the friendships i will nourish and maintain, the personal goals i will set and work toward, and the moments of laughter and joy i will experience are each aspects of my actionable mission to live a life that is vibrant, peaceful, and in service to those it touches. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ moreau fye professor lassen steven wu march 2, 2022 discernment of a goal: a meditation and a eulogy it has now finally come to the moment of the end of my life when this eulogy would be revealed. i seldom imagined my life to be something to be summarized in a few short paragraphs, but i could at least attempt to sketch an outline of the values that have commanded me during the past years and my journey towards discovering and making them a center of my life. i take special pride in the fact that i have stayed true to that quest of reflection and let my experiences and learnings take me, wherever they have led. i was a theorizer. it was soon after i started elementary school that i discovered my talent in the somewhat bureaucratic skills of creating documents and amending them. interestingly, this proved to be a pattern that guided my life for the most part. creating plans, breaking them, and creating new ones. plans made me more comfortable, but not necessarily settled, as they would often change and take me to new places. i remember how i fell in love with notre dame, then decided to take a gap year, and then decided to leave her but keep a special place in my heart for her forever. there are deeply emotional elements of this that i cannot exactly detail or express to you, but i’m sure you all understand how it feels to see what you have planned fall apart in front of you. it is, however, a humbling and illuminating experience to realize that even the most fixed of things are not at all stable. keeping my eyes focused on a purpose and always mindful of the direction i was going allowed me to lean on larger plans and life goals that truly mattered to me (“meet the nun” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). i was a goal-oriented person. sure, my catholic faith and my dedication to my career in public policy could qualify as major goals. but there were more abstract values that could turn out to be essential when situations demanded discernment. just as fr. hesburgh, the president of my beloved university did, i did not always draw up rules to help me stick to the strict framework of my affiliations but adapted as situations evolved (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). a lot of times i appeared rebellious as to my tradition and as to my family plans, but the practice of setting goals for myself made sure that i was not rebelling for rebellion’s sake. pursuing novel solutions did not compromise my values, but they did require that i have a good sense of what the “spirit of the law” truly was in the various hard decisions i had to make. part of that decision came down to my career, where i had to truly weigh the possibilities of living in different nations, a religious vocation, and relationships. it is true that no career choice would ever suffice to be a “plan” in the sense that it would provide you with all the answers (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center – moreau fye week four). but my experience choosing between different options led me to a deeper awareness, at the same time, of what my values meant in the real world. an episode i still remember had to do with me giving up theology as an academic career in favor of a more on-theground position. it initially made me doubt whether i was being unfaithful to my calling and simply acting on impulse. i eventually came to the realization that there is a way to reconcile and integrate my beliefs and what made me happy. a vocation is not an independent variable but is deeply intertwined with other parts of our identities and experiences (“discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five). i was a reflective person. i always enjoyed going to mass, even before i fully understood its implications and converted to catholicism. my theories and my goals ultimately derive from my habit of clearing out my brain, finding problems, and relating them to the larger orientation of my life. to insert those periods of reflection into my life made me conscious of occasional digressions and disruptions and gave me breathing room to bring it back in sync with the rest of my values (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). without my hours spent lying in the cemetery on campus, walking by st. lawrence river, and hours listening and silently reflecting on the subway, my perseverance in my values probably would not have survived to the end of my life. most of the learnings i explained in the previous chapters came from these moments. whereas others preferred following the practice of mindfulness, i found a sweet spot in a combination of traveling, moving between places, and silence in church and at various places on campus (“way to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center – moreau fye week six). i must confess that for me, staying at home or with my family was not a particularly relaxing experience and i sought refuge alone. i ultimately came to a middle ground between the more traditional and solid elements of my family and relationships, and my itinerant and curious quests. i was intentional in my relationships. that meant i made the effort to be conscious about how different relationships were taking me. if i simply went on without thinking, conversations could become monologues in some cases, where genuine dialogue is replaced by the two parties spitting words at each other without trying to understand (“jurisdiction” by fr. gregory boyle – moreau fye week seven). however, being intentional does not necessarily entail that i always had outcomes of particular relationships figured out beforehand. in fact, that had proved to be seriously counterproductive in many of my previous relationships. when i entered into dialogue with someone with a certain set of predetermined “script,” it almost invariably turned out badly. i grew to capture the random and spontaneous nature of relationships in tandem with the will to not compromise my values and express them clearly when i’m in one. in short, i did not attempt to control or manipulate the flow of relationships, but continually evaluated the relationships as they went and applied those learnings to my life decisions. my life, of course, could not be contained in these short paragraphs, but these are the elements of my past years that have shaped them as a holistic fulfilled experience. i hope that this had been, at the very least, an interesting story that might lead you to think about your own values and aspirations. what do you want to be remembered as, and remembered for? momento mori. fys 10102 capstone integration richardson 1 professor taylor fys 10102 24 april 2022 a transformative year: my freshman experience throughout my life, i have always sought to serve god. this semester has provided me a greater chance for self-reflection to discern the path god intends for me to follow to best accomplish this goal. by creating a personal mission statement for myself similar to the university of notre dame mission statement (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week thirteen), i have been able to better define this path for myself. this semester, i spent much time in self-reflection. following my first semester at notre dame, i took time at the beginning of this semester to reflect upon last semester and what i wished to improve upon this semester. i found my favorite place on campus, a spot with a view of the main building and basilica on st. mary’s lake, and spent time there in contemplation of last semester per pico iyer’s advice (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). there, i sat on a rock and prayed, asking god to show me how i could improve this semester and make better use of the time he has given me here at notre dame. this semester, i faced great personal challenges. my mother was diagnosed with endometrial cancer at the beginning of the semester. i was distraught, but thankfully, i had amazing friends, my future roommates, who have supported me throughout her illness this semester. my friends kept me grounded during this hectic and surreal semester through their constant support and honesty, the mark of a great friendship as father hesburgh described in a https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ richardson 2 letter to president nixon (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). as mother teresa said, “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, in which he quotes mother teresa moreau fye week seven). my friends and i showed each other great unconditional love as we helped each other navigate this semester. the love my friends showed me was immense as they helped me navigate this challenging time, which turned into a time of great discovery for me, both academic and personal. this semester, my classes were more difficult than they were last semester as i delved deeper into the courses required for my biochemistry major. while i faced challenges in these classes, i found them fascinating and enjoyed the questions presented to me in them. whether those questions had answers yet or not, i enjoyed reasoning my way through them and enjoyed the challenges they presented me even if i could not answer them. father michael himes said, “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied.” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). this semester, i found joy in being dissatisfied by the lack of answers to some of science’s greatest unanswered questions presented to us. i enjoyed devising my own hypotheses regarding the answers to these questions and would love to get to explore them more in the future. this semester, i was accepted into dr. stack’s ovarian cancer research lab in the fall of 2022. i am ecstatic to embark upon this work and to help however i can because i will be able to put to use the knowledge i have obtained here at notre dame thus far for good. my mom has struggled with ovarian cancer in the past, and i wrote one of my notre dame admissions essays about wanting to work in this lab, so being accepted into this lab is a dream come true for me. this semester, i have been glad to discover that i really do love my https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 richardson 3 major and the challenges it presents, and i am so excited to put my education to use to help others like my mom who have struggled with this disease while getting to explore my intellectual curiosity regarding this disease. in the future, i would love to work with ovarian cancer patients and perhaps to continue conducting ovarian cancer research in my future career as a doctor. this semester has reaffirmed that i will be happy working in medicine and that i have the capability to be successful doing so. personally, i have grown immensely this semester. i asked myself “what” questions instead of “why” questions per tasha eurich’s advice to enable myself to gain the most self-insight possible this semester (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, phd moreau fye week six). i discussed my strengths and weaknesses with my parents to gain greater self-insight. they said how i have a desire for achievement, for pushing my limits to discover what they are. they also reaffirmed my passion regarding uterine and ovarian cancer research. they said i am at my best when i am busy, when i have no time for fear or for self doubt (“week five discernment conversation activity” with eric and tracy richardson moreau fye week five). this conversation provided me with great insight into my own character and why i am the way i am. my life experiences have certainly shaped who i am. my mom’s past illnesses and her illness this semester have increased my desire to conduct ovarian or uterine cancer research and to perhaps be an ob/gyn in the future so i can help people by providing excellent and compassionate medical care to others the same way in which my mom has been helped. during the next three years here at notre dame, i will be working in dr. stack’s ovarian cancer research lab to embark upon this goal. my past life experiences have shaped my desire and goals for the https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit richardson 4 next three years and my life beyond notre dame. as the meruelo family center for career development stated, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i have found this to be true throughout my life, but particularly this semester, as my past experiences are starting to shape my time here at notre dame and beyond. this semester, i became more engaged with groups on campus such as pemco. i just performed in the club’s revue “seeking answers anywhere.” i loved the process of putting on this show because it allowed me to make new amazing friends and continue pursuing my love of theater from high school while also helping out a good cause. all of the ticket proceeds from the show benefit the irc ukraine relief fund. by performing in this show, i was able to have great fun while using my talents to serve others, which i have always sought to do with my life. i hope to continue to perform in pemco productions in the future and to help worthy causes such as this one in future productions during my next three years here at notre dame. during the next three years at notre dame and beyond, i hope to become even more engaged in service to marginalized communities. as a doctor, i hope to provide affordable, quality specialty medical care to those belonging to underprivileged and marginalized communities. i seek to embody the spirit of inclusion jesus showed to all in his service to all people, as articulated in “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac: a guide to student life moreau fye week ten). i hope to accompany others but also to be accompanied by them, as described by professor steve reifenberg, so i can learn from my patients as i help them and so i can learn from other service https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ richardson 5 work i do here at notre dame and beyond (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i hope to seek out viewpoints different from my own in my time here at notre dame, as well. already, i have benefited from my dorm community in particular, as i have had many conversations with girls in my dorm with viewpoints different from my own and with backgrounds entirely different from my own. in doing so, i have gained a greater appreciation of other cultures, and i have gained insight into other viewpoints surrounding various issues that i had not considered before. i have also had the opportunity to engage in such discourse in my glynn family honors program class seminars. i am grateful for the opportunities already presented to me here at notre dame to have such discussions, and i hope to continue engaging in such discussions during the next few years because they will allow me to better understand the people i hope to serve and to understand important issues i hope to remedy in the future. this is vitally important, as described by dr. paul blaschko (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). by having knowledge of other viewpoints and empathizing with others who have suffered, i will have the courage to speak up about such issues and to amplify the voices of those who are marginalized, the importance of which was emphasized by dean g. marcus cole of the notre dame law school (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). by doing all of this, i will consider my life one that has been well-lived (“defining a life well-lived” integration by moreau fye week eight). https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1r9bbxva_5x8j-tmfhbsw9xjj-gz8kjtjcrxbiwfnyme/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1r9bbxva_5x8j-tmfhbsw9xjj-gz8kjtjcrxbiwfnyme/edit?usp=sharing richardson 6 this semester has been one full of challenges, but it has also been extremely eye-opening and transformative. i look forward to the next three years at notre dame as i continue to grow and embark upon the journey god has planned for me. i would first like to extend my gratitude to all the relatives, friends, and attendees who have come today to honor this great man, jaylen jerrold sneed, a person we have come to love for many years. the amount of people here today goes to show how many lives he touched in the short time that he was here with us. hard work and determination characterized how strong this loving son, uncle, friend, and cousin he was. he was born to chanta ellison and jerrold sneed in 2004 on a small island in south carolina called hilton head. i was honored to be able to call him my best friend. when jaylen was a kid he enjoyed playing sports and hanging out with friends. that's when his football career started. growing up on hilton head in such a small community everyone knew him as this smart, loving, and kind kid. when i was asked to write this i wanted to be able to get everyone's opinion on him so i asked around and the thing that stood out to me was when they would talk about his smile and how it could bring light into any and everyone's life when i heard that it would just light up my day because i would just be thinking about that big smile on his face it was truly beautiful. he always “lived his life as if nothing bad can ever happen”.(qqc#3) when living like that you truly get the full experience out of life. in his teenage years, his dream was to “to play football at the highest level possible because he had worked half of his life and worked as hard as he could for at long as i can remember”.(qqc#5) the was something special about him, he was always determined to get done what had to be done. one of the most important was making sure “his mom never had to work again”.(qqc#4) even though this didn't pan out because he passed so young this showed how much he loved his mother. the love for his mother is what drove him to be the best at everything he did in life. he and that woman made such a great team, they were inseparable they always made sure the other had what they needed it was just such an amazing bond and relationship. when he got to notre dame “he struggled with adversity he always found a way to overcome and get what he wanted to be done.”(qqc#2) he would always call me and tell me how hard it was. i would always tell him your you can do anything you put your mind to. he had shown that throughout his life so i knew there was nothing that he couldn't do. which made him so special. he would be always so calm during games. i would always remember going to his games and seeing the way “how they huddle before every play just to take a slight pause and think rather than just rushing to the line and starting a new play.”(qqc#1) jaylen was such a humble man. on the field, he really showed everyone what he was about. he loved to show his talent and compete against the best players on the opposing teams. he was a man who always said “i am a man that is not giving up on life and always finding god”(qqc#6). enough about college life. let us talk about what really made him the man he was to this day and beyond. jaylen. nfl. jaylen's lifetime goal was to be in the nfl. he made it and he made the most out of it. he loved it so much. he learned so much whether it was on or off the field. when jaylen was on the field he was always doing the best he could. whenever i called him, he was either at practice or when he was not at practice he was working on his skills with his personal trainer or by himself. the nfl was the best time of jaylen’s life. when jaylen was not at football, he was at home with his lovely family. he loved spending time with them. jaylen had things most people did not have. something that stood out to me was when he said “tenderness i feel like is a gift to have because a lot of people dont have this trait.”(qqc#7). he cared so much about them. i remember when he would come randomly and surprise either his children or wife with such amazing gifts that would literally put them into tears. outside of his family, he loved his mom, cousins, aunts, uncles. he would do anything for them. i am standing here talking about a man who really lived his life to the fullest. he is a man that will always be in our hearts and minds. he did so much for his family, his teammates, and anyone that needed him. he was a man that acted tough on the outside, but he was super soft on the inside. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week two) (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four) (“personal talk with grandpa” by my grandpa moreau fye week five) (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week six) (“jurisdiction” by tattoos on the heart moreau fye week seven) integration three moreau mr. oswald 4 march 2022 how to not waste your life away many people live their lives doing things that do not make them happy, which makes them feel unfulfilled even to their death. one must contemplate their values in life so that they pursue activities or professions that make them feel fulfilled, rather than feeling like they wasted their life away. throughout the past semester in moreau, i have contemplated my definition of a life well-lived and how i can put this definition to practice in my own life. this is especially important as i go forward in choosing activities and majors to pursue in college and post-college plans. my reflections in moreau have helped me see that a life well-lived consists of giving back to the community, pursuing something that fulfills me, and finding time to slow down. giving back to the community benefits the well-being of others, which increases a person’s moral virtue and satisfaction. the documentary “hesburgh” stated, “father hesburgh recognized that we a had a duty to serve and give back to the greater community” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh is a famous figure of morality due to his actions as an educator, public servant, and social activist. father hesburgh dedicated his time and energy towards helping others which allowed him to thrive. he believed that we must serve and give back to the greater community to fulfill our moral duty and live a life well-lived. father michael himes would agree with this, as he disputed, “if no one else needs my gift, even though it may be a sense of happiness and joy to me, even though it may be something i am good at, it’s not my vocation” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291?module_item_id=144741 moreau fye week three). if we spend our lives doing things that only make us happy, we are not doing what’s morally right. at notre dame, i give back to others by involving myself in best buddies and the social impact division of sibc. luckily, i love both of these clubs and they contribute towards the greater good, which develops my moral virtue. we must benefit others and foster positive change to live a life well-lived as father hesburgh did. however, a person must not only pursue a profession that benefits others, but also a profession that fulfills them. this is done by ensuring that their values, interests, and skills are a significant part of their life. within the article “navigating your career journey,” the undergraduate career services remarked, “he contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). pursuing a career that interests a person ensures that they will feel fulfilled in later years. it’s also important that they are skilled at what they do so they don’t feel incompetent. if both of these factors are secured, they won’t feel dreadful about getting up and going to work every day and feel like they’re wasting away their life. in moreau week five, i contemplated how these factors applied to my future. i discussed, “when discussing the prompt’s questions with my mom, she confirmed many views i had about myself. for example, she said i would feel most fulfilled in a profession where i’m helping others and making a difference, but also one where i can be independent and support myself” (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week five). my mom helped me see that i can benefit the greater good, which is a significant value i hold, while also doing something that i’m interested in and good at. i’ve always been interested in special education law because i would https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit not only benefit the greater good by defending students in special education, but i would also feel fulfilled by pursuing my interest in law. i am particularly interested in law because i’ve always been skilled at reading and writing, which is why i chose to pursue political science at notre dame. i want to become well-versed in the operations of the government and understand the political structure, so i can make a large impact within education law. this is a good example of how someone would be able to pursue a job that would fulfill them and also benefit others. nonetheless, one must still not spend all of their time working towards their profession. finding time to slow down allows a person to slow down to appreciate the current moment and express gratitude for their blessings. iyer stated in “why we need to slow down our lives,” “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). by not slowing down, a person allows the current moment to pass by quickly. this shades a person from appreciating their current situation. it’s hard to express gratitude when a person is unable to slow down and reflect on their blessings. dr. kim experienced a tragic situation that forced him to slow down and recognize everything he had to be grateful for. dr. kim in the “5 minutes” video expressed, “i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). dr. kim realized that before, he didn’t take the time to slow down and count his blessings. after he became paralyzed, he realized everything he had taken for granted, like the ability to walk. now he recognizes that he still has many things that others desire. this was similar to clever’s experience in fr. greg boyle’s “tattoos on the heart.” when one of clever’s coworkers passed away, he conveyed, “he was not my enemy. he was my friend. we worked together” (“tattoos https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 on the heart” by fr. greg boyle, s.j., moreau fye week seven). clever was only able to realize his appreciation for his coworker, an opposing gang member, after he had died. this is likely because he took the current moment for granted and wasn’t able to express his gratitude until after his coworker was taken away from his life. as important as it is that people spend their lives doing work that is significant to others and themselves, it’s also important that they find the time to slow down and show appreciation for their blessings. the grotto is a place that helps me slow down and reflect on my blessings at notre dame. i always remind myself of how lucky i am to be at this school and thank god for all of my blessings when i pray there. people cannot let their lives pass by without reflecting and counting their blessings. altogether, to live a life well-lived, people must pursue something that benefits the well-being of others to increase their moral virtue. nonetheless, they must also pursue something that fulfills them and ensures that their values, interests, and skills are a significant part of their profession. however, people must also find time to slow down and appreciate the current moment and express gratitude for their blessings. each of these aspects would make sure that someone did not feel as if they wasted their life away. they would feel fulfilled, content, and a valuable member of society. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 integration 3 week 8 (integration) defining my best life in the first seven weeks of my second semester at notre dame, we continuously discussed a “life well-lived.” in these weeks, we talked about the kind of life we were living, the things that inspire us to live well, what we want to do, and what can help or hurt our pursuit of this life. over this time, i have developed an idea of what i believe defines a “life well-lived,” and in this essay, i will be explaining the aspects of that definition. before i could formulate my definition, i needed to reflect on what kind of life i had been living, which was the goal during the first week of moreau first year experience this semester. i felt that my first semester was relatively successful in terms of the fact that i made solid friendships and performed well academically. however, i did not spend my free time the best way i could have. i did not play any recreational sports or join any clubs, which prevented me from putting myself out there. but what was even worse was when i was just relaxing, i was not doing so in the best way possible. a quote from a ted article in week one impacted me by saying: “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in other words, instead of just playing games or scrolling through social media, i should have spent that time sitting and thinking and taking in information. that was one of the things, along with not being more outgoing, that prevented me from truly living my best life during the first semester. in addition, i found that, when facing challenges, i was asking myself the wrong questions. during week six of moreau fye, we discussed certain obstacles preventing us from living a life well-lived. one of those typical obstacles is the way we perform introspection. one ted article said, “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective [yes, there’s a wrong way]” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). after reading this, i realized that i was asking myself many “why” questions whenever i was struggling with something, which was ultimately unhelpful towards solving the problem because it only revealed the surface of the issue. i realized that i was preventing myself from living well by not introspecting well, which prevented me from finding the true causes of my struggles. after finding out that i was not living the life i wanted to, i had to look toward what i aspired to do. during the third week, we read an article about the philosophy of a particular nun. she said, “for almost all of humanity, people died at younger ages than we do now, more frequently died at home, and had less medical control over their final days. death was far less predictable, and far more visible” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). sister theresa aletheia noble, in this situation, is reminding all of us to remember that our time is finite, so we should not take our lives for granted. keeping this in mind, i knew that i needed to figure out my definition soon to start living a life well-lived as quickly as possible. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html in weeks four and five of moreau, we explored different career paths and discerned what we wanted to do in our lives. these two weeks were especially helpful in learning more about myself and helping define how a good life for me would look. a notre dame resource article from week four outlined how we should look for the best career for us, saying that “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i felt like i had a good idea of my self-concept, defined as my values, interests, personality, and skills. however, in the fifth week, we discussed with people close to us to see what they think our self-concept is. i had a phone call with my mother and asked her to answer a few assigned questions. while she affirmed some of my core values and life goals, she also pointed out that i had forgotten or ignored specific values of mine in my first semester, like family (my mom moreau fye week five). being away from my family caused me to forget how much i care about and value them. this conversation was essential for figuring out my “life well-lived” definition. after considering all of this information, i formulated my definition of a life well-lived. i believe that a life well-lived is where you live to better yourself and other people. in week two of moreau, we discussed things and people that inspire us to live a good life, and we watched the movie “hesburgh.” in the film, there was a quote that said, “the latin word for priest is pontifex, [which means] bridge builder. ted was a bridge-builder between people and god and among people” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh is inspirational to me because i would like to be a bridge-builder in the lives of others around me, too. my main goal in life is to help people, and i want to do that in as many ways as possible, including bringing people of all backgrounds together toward acceptance. in addition, in week seven, we discussed relationships and how they impact a life well-lived. in a ted talk, pope francis said, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). being with people is an essential aspect of living your best life. in other words, my time in moreau fye so far this semester has led me to believe that a life well-lived is one where you do your best to help others and better yourself. no matter what career i go into, i want to help people. if i can live a life where i can be with loved ones, work towards making myself better, and help as many people around me, then i am living my best life. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis week 8 integration 3 story of the enigmatic journey of discovery today is a deeply sad one, but even in this time of grief i can't help but think of the many wonderful experiences that i and the rest of you shared with neol. as we experience this loss, it is important to remember how much richer our lives have been through the relationship with him. we shared great memories and laughs but neol left a great legacy that i wish to talk about. for most of his early life, he lived his life fast-paced and focused on working towards achieving his goals. at some point in college for some reason, he took the time to think about what we wanted out of his life and what type of life he wanted to live. one of the first things he realized was that he was living life too quickly and was so involved with technology. he described it as taking things for granted due to how quickly he would receive data from technology. he referred to a quote that said, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). once he started to take more breaks from technology and rapid information collection, he began to think more about his future and the big major goal. neol soon became inspired to live a well-lived life. he wanted to enjoy life to the fullest while also thinking about what type of legacy he wanted to leave be behind. he was inspired by people such as father hesburgh and jessica pedroza from the domer dozen. he admired jessica because she was leaving a legacy behind that improved education for everyone. he was also inspired by hesburgh’s leadership, neol quoted a biography, “ hesburgh removed deans, he https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ removed faculty members, he made a change, and he didn’t accept less than excellence.” (“hesburgh” jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) hesburgh wanted the best for the university of notre dame and left a wonderful legacy, neol respected him for that. neol also reached a semi-dark but open-minded stage where he questioned the idea of death and why it was taboo. he referred back to sister atetheia’s ideology of wanting to embrace the idea of death. neol referred to her quote saying, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness…….but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). at first, he found this ideology to be dark but then found it intriguing. he realized that every person has a timer and he should make the most of it by doing things outside of his comfort zone instead of wasting his time being scared to try new things. neol learned new skills such as learning to play the violin and also involved himself more within the notre dame community. he did not want the fear of death to hinder him nor did he want to waste any more time. while discovering what he wanted his future to be, neol stepped back and thought about his major and career. he reflected on if he really wanted to become a civil engineer. as part of his career discernment journey, he looked at university resources such as the undergraduate career resources to be sure he was certain of his major. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (undergraduate career services moreau fye week four) this quote stuck to neol because he had been doing a variety of extra activities that he found interesting and also realized that he found others boring. one example was his concrete canoe club, he had been in the club since he arrived in notre dame and he genuinely enjoyed https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ participating and working with the people there. however, he had also tried the video game club but did not stick to it because he wasn’t as interested in technology as he was in civil engineering. neol mentioned that during this part of his discernment journey, he talked to an upperclassman in his dorm, duncan hall. he chose to speak to this upperclassman because they both shared the same major and were in a few similar clubs. neol asked the upperclassman what he thought about the civil engineering program at notre dame but one of neol’s best questions was when he asked the upperclassman what he thought about neol’s role in the club and civil engineering as a whole. the upperclassman said that he showed excitement in the club which made neol feel more confident about his decision. neol said, “hearing these responses made me reassure that i was on the right track and not forcing myself to like a major since i was genuinely motivated.” (week 5 reflection by moreau week five) neol also learned another valuable lesson about approaching life. “but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others.” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau week six). in this quote, a paralyzed man by the name of dr. kim describes his approach to life by being more grateful for the bodily functions has rather than complaining about what he doesn’t have and what he can’t do. by being more grateful, kim was able to enjoy life and became happier. neol took this approach to hurt and rather than complaining or feeling sad about the things he didn’t have, neol continued to move forward by fixing the problem of finding a way to deal with it. this helped him many times when he underestimated his intelligence after doing horrible in school and also helped whenever he doubted himself as a civil engineer. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 during school and even after in the workforce, neol liked the idea of unity and inclusion. he would always reflect back towards this quote by pope francis, “ how wonderful would it be if the growth of scientific and technological innovation would come along with more equality and social inclusion.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) this message made neol think about how beautiful the world would be if everyone was in unity. a world without separation but instead cooperation is a goal worth working towards. neol heavily lived by this idea even until his death, he felt that cooperation was an important aspect of living a good life along with valuing relationships. i always found it odd why neol suddenly began that journey of self-reflection at notre dame during his first year. ever since he began school in the bronx, he never had to think about that sort of thing because he felt that all he had to do was work until he got accepted into a great university and would see from there. but that first year of university introduced him to a whole new world of people and backgrounds. neol felt happy being there and that must have been why began those changes in his life in freshman year. however, now that i remember, he would always mention his class called moreau first-year experience that he took with catherine wagner. i’m sure he was grateful for that class, even in his last moments. angel gonzalez rodriguez maria finan moreau first-year experience 26 april 2022 a never-ending pursuit when it comes to choosing how to live my life, i have a mission statement that i do my best to stick to at all times. it’s a mission statement that helps guide me as i continue on with my pursuit of a life well-lived. it applies to all areas of my life, a life in which i fill multiple roles ranging from family man to community member on opposite sides of the country. the following is the mission statement i live by, as well as what i will do moving forward to stay true to it. 1. i seek to be present for others as a son, an older sibling, and a friend. to be present for others, i will treat others with kindness and respect, just as i would want others to treat me; i will also demonstrate tenderness with others by seeking to see things from their perspective. perhaps it sounds a bit strange for me to say this, but as his holiness pope francis puts it, tenderness is about “being on the same level as the other. god himself descended into jesus to be on our level. this is the same path the good samaritan took. this is the path that jesus himself took. he lowered himself, he lived his entire human existence practicing the real, concrete language of love. [...] it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted conferences moreau fye week seven). another way in which i will remain present for others is that i pledge to stay true to the commitments i make. the biggest commitment i make with people tends to be that i’ll accompany them at all times, which goes hand in hand with treating them with kindness and respect. as professor steve reifenberg says, “to accompany someone is to go somewhere with him or her, to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an end. there’s an element of mystery, of openness, of trust, in accompaniment. the companion, the accompagnateur, says: ‘i’ll go with you and support you on your journey wherever it leads; i’ll share your fate for a while.’ and by ‘a while,’ i don’t mean a little while” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” moreau fye week nine). i will try to see both sides of an argument before making a judgment; as i view it, to be present for someone involves hearing the argument they’re trying to make, even if it doesn’t align with the argument i would make in the same situation. “when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with, and when we find others around us supporting and encouraging us to do so, we need to take a step back and reorient ourselves. we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well thought-out, or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). lastly, i will not allow the opinions of others to change how i live. my roommate during my freshman year at the university of notre dame once told me that “to live a life well-lived, one has to remain true to their ideals and give it their all in the pursuit of what makes them happy” (from reflection activity moreau fye week five). being present for others whether it be for my parents, my younger brother, or my friends is an ideal i’ve always strived to fulfill, and i can’t become estranged from that ideal (or any other of my ideals) just because some may not agree with me on the subject. 2. make the most of my four years as a student at the university of notre dame from religious, academic, and social standpoints. (this one is subject to change once my time here is up, but for the time being it holds true.) for starters, i will go to mass on sundays be it in the basilica of the sacred heart or in the chapel in st. edward’s hall to continue strengthening my catholic faith, which has already grown very strong throughout my freshman year. for many, the sabbath is “the one day a week we take off” that “becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda, as through the light-filled passageways of notre dame [de paris]” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). furthermore, dr. jihoon kim states that “i may not be able to spend the many, many hours to pray [sic] to god, but i will use these five minutes to not just pray for myself. [but] i could pray for others, i could pray for my loved ones, and i will utilize these five minutes and do something about it instead of focusing on what i cannot do” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). as a busy college student, my academic commitments may not give me time to pray for multiple hours at a time. however, instead of complaining about not being able to observe the entirety of the sabbath, i do what i can to observe it by setting aside an hour of my day every sunday to attend mass as well as saying a quick prayer before i head out the door in the morning and before going to bed at night. as a scholar, i will do my best to do well in the classroom and to be involved with multiple clubs. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. [...] contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i may be set on pursuing a civil engineering degree, and while my efforts will mainly be concentrated on doing well in my classes, i also want to have some free time to participate in clubs and explore my interests outside of the classroom. aside from giving me more things to add to my résumé, i’ll have the opportunity to meet new people and get my mind off of my classes for a little while. finally, i will spend a few hours with friends on friday nights to take a break from my studies. this, coupled with my previous two points in this section, will allow me to come even closer to achieving an optimal work-life balance; my academics won’t leave me too burnt out to where i won’t want to socialize, and my social life won’t negatively affect my academics. 3. as a member of the notre dame/south bend community as well as of the community in my hometown of healdsburg, i seek to improve the lives of others. i pledge to do community service with local non-profit organizations. growing up in the healdsburg community, i received so many opportunities to excel namely, a college counseling program through a local non-profit organization, designed for prospective first-generation college students. now, having spent a year on the notre dame campus has opened so many doors for me to excel even more, from internship opportunities to strengthening my faith. and if there’s something both of these communities have provided me with since day one, it’s a great support system that’s composed of multiple individuals. knowing that i have a great community backing me in my hometown is great, but knowing i have an equally great community at college that also backs me is impossible to beat; i want to give back and assist both communities when possible so that they can benefit from my support, just as i benefit from theirs. i will offer to interpret for spanish speakers in settings where only english is spoken, and for english speakers where only spanish is spoken. my parents’ knowledge of the english language has always been very limited, and therefore i do lots of interpreting and translating for them in a variety of settings and contexts; i’ve done the same for my english-speaking peers whose experience with the spanish language is not very extensive. being fluent in both languages, i am more than happy to help others out when they’re struggling to understand a language that isn’t their first language. i will be inclusive of others, regardless of differences between us. during my time at notre dame, i have come across many people whose viewpoints on various topics don’t necessarily align with my own. however, this doesn’t mean that i need to be disrespectful to them; at the end of the day, they’re just as human as i am. these encounters have allowed me to learn that “notre dame’s a crossroads, where all the intellectual and moral currents of our times meet and dialogue. a place where all of the burning issues that affect the church and the world today are plumbed to their depths in an atmosphere of faith. where differences of culture and religion, conviction can coexist with friendship and civility, and even love” (fr. theodore hesburgh, csc in hesburgh moreau fye week two). so, though my peers and i may not see eye-to-eye in some regards, efforts will be made on my part for us to get along and be productive with the time we spend together. 4. as an older brother, first-generation college student, and member of multiple communities, i will be an effective leader and role model. i vow to demonstrate exemplary behavior, always doing my best in everything i do. primarily, this means continuing to strive for bigger and better things when i reach goals i’ve previously set for myself; this may seem selfish at first, but to support my statement i’d like to mention a quote from fr. michael himes that has really stuck with me. “[st.] augustine also noted, ‘dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us.’ it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing” (“three key questions” moreau fye week three). in living in dissatisfaction, i’m only seeking to become better and more well-rounded than i already am; it’s through this dissatisfaction that i will continue to set an example for my younger brother to follow as he gets older and begins to see the world through his own lens. i will remain sober so i can be fully conscious and fully aware of my surroundings at all times. every group needs a sober friend when going to a party, and though my friends don’t go crazy when we’re at parties, it’s important for one of us to stay sober to ensure we all make it back safely. i will always be the sober friend because a) i’m not attracted to intoxicating myself to any extent, and b) i care about my friends and want to make sure we’re doing well and (responsibly) having a good time. besides, with a brother who looks up to me and parents who have high expectations and with a number of drinkers in my family’s past it wouldn’t be too pleasant for them to see me in any state other than a sober one. i will call someone out when they’re doing something wrong, even if that person is one of my loved ones. “not often encountering these challenges [of the notion that white people can represent all of humanity], we withdraw, defend, cry, argue, minimize, ignore, and in other ways push back to regain our racial position and equilibrium. i term that push back white fragility.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost moreau fye week ten). as someone whose friend group constitutes a good amount of white people some of whom went to private high schools prior to coming to notre dame i can tell when there’s a bit of racial fragility in scenarios where conversations about, say, a growing latino population in the us are taking place. but instead of bashing them for it, i attempt to educate them in a way that allows them to see my point of view and accept it. but there have been instances in the distant past where, instead of accepting my perspective, i come under fire for it except that the fire is aimed more at my persona than it is at my words. “as an african-american man, i have had the experience of being pulled over by a police officer, with no apparent or expressed reason for the stop. i have been berated and verbally abused, without receiving a ticket or a warning. the most scarring of these events occurred in front of my two little boys, who are now grown, african-american men themselves.” by marcus cole, dean of the notre dame law school moreau fye week twelve). i’ve been on the receiving end of racist remarks, but i’m not afraid to call the other person out for it. some instances ended with me losing a friend, but it was worth it as long as the racist remarks were heard no longer. moreau capstone assignment 4/25/21 nhat nguyen moreau fys capstone assignment when writing my mission statement, i did a lot of reflecting on the past year in moreau and the lessons, activities, and discussion i’ve had every thursday in o’shag. we’ve engaged in thirteen different conversations this semester, ranging from racism, to acts of service, to families, to career paths, and even opening up to peers through our ongoing goal of vulnerability. in my mission statement from week 13, i reflected on my younger self and compared my present accomplishments and goals with her dreams and aspirations. i shared my hopes for the future – the type of person i want to be, and the impact i want to have on my community and in my respective field. through each assigned moreau module, it became clearer and clearer each day the type of life i wanted to live and the main point of my mission statement. the first line of my mission statement reads, “i want to create something beautiful. whether that’s through a career, in my education, with friends and family, or through outreach to communities, i want to have a viable impact in my life, and be able to look back on my accomplishments with a sense of pride and humility”. in week 1, we read an article called why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer, which talks about the impact of social media and technology on our daily lives, and why it’s important to find other ways to increase the quality of our lives besides scrolling through feeds and skimming apps. i chose a quote from the article which reads, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (iyer). i think this relates to the first part of my mission statement because, by stepping back from the comfort of our phones and internet bubble, we are able to expand our interests, grow our hobbies, and find our passions in other aspects of life. i remember over quarantine, instead of constantly scrolling through videos on tiktok, i decided to buy some oil paints and start following bob ross painting tutorials, which eventually led my mom into picking up graphic design on her ipad. this is one small example of the benefit that taking a step back from our routines can have on us. i want to continue this in my next three years by limiting my social media usage and joining clubs and activities to find my passions, the next line in my mission statement reads, “i want to make my younger self feel proud of me”. in week 2 of moreau this semester, we watched hesburgh, a documentary surrounding the impressive humanitarian and political work and life of beloved past-notre dame president father theodore hesburgh, c.s.c. in week 3, we read an article called three key questions by father michael himes, which talked about finding your passions and niche in life through seeking out joy and finding your own talents. father hesburgh found joy through the notre dame community and being a leading force in politics and the resolution of social issues – he was talented at finding common ground between opposing parties, as we saw in his story about taking a group up to wisconsin to go fishing. fr. hesburgh once said, “you don't make decisions because they are easy; you don't make them because they are cheap; you don't make them because they're popular; you make them because they're right” (hesburgh), which i think is an incredibly powerful statement and truly shows that, in order to live a life well-lived, you must prioritize the right thing at all times knowing it will benefit everyone around you. fr. hines says in his week 3 article, “happiness is distinct, but it’s not about life. joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied. it is the deep delight that one feels in being called to something still before you—to a new decision and to a new way of living” (himes). for me, living a life-well lived is finding and fulfilling that joy, as opposed to constantly seeking temporary happiness – and that’s exactly what father hesburgh did. i continue in my mission statement – “ i can remember days when it was hard to get out of bed – a constant feeling and reminder of failure and uncertainty about the future. i was convinced i’d end up washed up and not be able to succeed in college, but fast forward a few years, i’ve proved myself wrong”. in weeks 4, 5, and 6, we discussed career paths, using our best qualities, and being aware of our obstacles to succeeding. completing a career development reflection assignment in week 4 highlighted our strengths and possible future career ideas based on these – the meruelo family center for career development has a helpful website for navigating your career journey, in which it says, “if someone focuses only on skill, for example, he/she may realize that that interest is lacking or alignment with values or personality is off. that person can do the career for a while but eventually will start to feel dissatisfied and likely burn out. this reinforces the need to consider all four aspects values, interests, personality, and skills when making a career decision” (meruelo career development). this emphasizes the importance of using all of your best traits to find a career path, as opposed to focusing solely on one. i’ve definitely made my younger self proud with my intended career path – i chose pre-med over my love for film and television, and decided to challenge myself with new types of chemistry, physics, and biology. i combined my people skills with my love for exploration and my knack for delving deep into topics to find a subject i was truly passionate about. one thing to admit, however, is i’ve definitely found my weaknesses when looking for a career and a future goal. in a conversation with my mom during the week 5 discernment conversation activity, i reflected in my follow-up, “one thing she always tells me is to stop caring about the opinions of others, and work harder to be more carefree and spontaneous by stepping out of my comfort zone”. one of my weaknesses is being overly focused on the opinions and perspectives of others, instead of keeping my head straight forward and focusing on myself. during my first semester at nd, i gradually began to focus more on my own perspective of myself, as at the end of the day it is usually the only one that matters. i believe by gaining a better understanding of yourself, you are more likely to live a meaningful life. in week 6, we read the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich, which talked about the importance of truly getting to know yourself – “university of sydney psychologist anthony m. grant discovered that people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness. similar studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content” (eurich). i believe by putting aside your lesser qualities and vowing to improve http://sydney.edu.au/science/people/anthony.grant.php https://www.sbp-journal.com/index.php/sbp/article/view/1219 http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00223980.2010.528072 them, we can gain an amazing perspective into our own lives and a path for the future will gradually and surely appear. further on in my mission statement, i confessed, “ what once was friendship turned into months of one-upping each other with test grades, act/sat scores, and extracurricular activities. i honestly don’t know why i was so obsessed with the achievements of others during my teenage years. i do think this set boundaries on what i believed i was capable of, though”. this relates to week 7-10, in which we discussed relationships and the intersection of suffering and learning together. in week 7, we read a chapter from father boyle’s book tattoos on the heart, in which we learned of the importance of allowing people into our lives, but also maintaining productive relationships: “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out. sometimes we strike the moral high moral distance of judgment – moving our protected jurisdictions far from each other. that is also, largely, the problem in the groupthink of gangs” (boyle). this quote is important because it relates the struggle i felt when finding a balance between friendship and academic competition, which unfortunately was a prevalent issue at my high school. boyle says that we need to let down these walls and get close with others in order to sustain and grow these important relationships that help us live a strong and successful life. i mentioned this struggle in my integration iii in week 8, in which i discussed what it means to live a well-lived life – and finding strong friendships was one of the aspects of having a meaningful existence. in week 9, we talked about how we respond to suffering through teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by prof. steve reifenberg, in which he discusses the importance of finding these relationships: “my life has been enormously enriched through those relationships, and the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences, teaching, international development, and much more” (reifenberg). through friendship and community, we are able to combine suffering with accompaniment and help those dealing with hard times feel more supported and hopeful. this relates to our discussions in week 10, where we talked about the spirit of inclusion, and why it’s essential to embrace humanity regardless of differences. in the powerful article growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh, he talks about his fear of not being accepted by his peers and the consequences that coming out would have on him. he explains, “in my mind, there were two alternatives: either i was not attracted to men — not permanently, anyway — or god did not love me. if he loved me and i was gay, he would make me straight. i thought admitting to myself that i was gay would make it true” (walsh). this is an unfortunate but very prevalent truth that most lgbtq+ youth go through – but with community and an abundance of unconditional acceptance, we are able to make this step so much easier for our peers. i ended my mission statement by saying, “learning through the wisdom of others and from their life experiences can only benefit you, and i think there is so much value in being surrounded by different people of different backgrounds who all work together to make you truly happy”. in week 11, we talked about the dangers of an echo chamber and how we can grow in wisdom by watching a thinknd video by dr. paul blaschko on how to avoid an echo chamber. in the video, he explains, “first, of course, we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments. secondly, though, we need to keep an eye on our own motives, when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with, and when we find others around us encouraging and supporting us to do so, we need to take a step back and reorient ourselves” (blaschko). this emphasizes my mission statement of hoping to grow in wisdom and through discourse and the experience of others. in week 12, we concluded the semester with a focus on courage, and how we can act immediately to stick up for our beliefs and values, and because it’s the right thing to do. in an article by nd law school dean marcus cole, he has a profound reflection on his situation, “still, i have often thought about what lasting scars may have cut into their psyche by watching what that officer did to me that night. i often wonder what my sons think of me, as a man, and as their protector, knowing that i could not fight back” (cole). in this article, dean cole talks about an incident in which his father was brutally beaten in a racist attack by three white men, and that it was only because of his neighbors that his father’s attackers drove away. nowadays, it is vital that we stick up for what’s right, and stand against the face of racism, violence, and any other form of hatred. it is when we stick together as a community, either in our dorms, in the nd student body, or even as human beings, that we can uplift and make a difference in each other's lives. works cited (why we need to slow down our lives”) by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“hesburgh documentary") produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) (“three key questions”) by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) ("navigating your career journey”) from the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way!”) by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction”) by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together”) by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine (“growing up gay and catholic”) by jacob walsh – moreau fye week ten (“how to avoid an echo chamber”) by paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something”) by dean marcus cole, moreau fye week twelve intergration eulogy glass half full thinking we all are gathered to remember and celebrate the well-lived life of nicholas rocco pietrosante. let's take a moment to reflect on this soul's remarkable life. nick was born at st. joe's hospital in michigan on cold october night. he was the eldest of 4 siblings (charlie, joey, and katie). his brothers and sister were his world, and we're so proud of what they accomplished. nick went to st.regis middle school, then to brother rice highschool, and finally graduated from the university of notre dame. all his peers loved him for his goofy and caring personality. by all his classmates, he was remembered for his welcoming nature and how easy he was to get along with. father greg boyle talks about jurisdiction and how social and innate boundaries prevent people from loving unconditionally. ("tattoos on the heart" by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). nick didn't care if you were blue or red, fat or tall he, anyone, the time of day let so many people into his personal bubble. to this day, i think this was his most remarkable trait. he was the ice breaker for any group and could get even the quietest of rooms chatting like drunken parents at a football game. nick gave everyone the benefit of the doubt and only really despised people on minimal occurrences. nick and his mom were incredibly close no one knew him quite like her. when talking to his mother, julie (right there), she had shown how much nick cared about people. (“conversation with my mom" by mommoreau fye week five). one of the most pivotal things she mentioned was how his superb social awareness helped him to be kind to so many. nick knew how painful it was to be left out, so he did everything in his power to prevent people from experiencing this awful feeling. nicks's utilization of his social skills taught him to understand how powerful words were. nick was careful before he ever spoke. he truly thought of the implications of his words when he said. nick did this by openly allowing people into his jurisdiction so they could be loved, whether by talking to a new kid or giving someone the time of day who is unique. on another note, julie told https://www.amazon.com/tattoos-heart-power-boundless-compassion/dp/1439153159 glass half full thinking me she only cared about two things for nick. that he was happy and above all a good person. nicks's mother thought these were the most significant indicators of a well-lived life. now, if anyone knew nick, they know he was a worrier. there wasn't a time in the day he wasn't anxious about some test or injury. even though this trait can have sometimes have a negative connotation, it was who he was. as nick progressed throughout his education and life, he started to address this dilemma in his life. when gandhi said "this is going to be a very busy day. i won't be able to meditate for an hour." his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. "i'll have to meditate for two," he spelled out.( "text: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted)" by gandhi moreau fye week one). gandhi shows the importance of taking a step back when you have a lot on your table because a clouded mind is unproductive. when nick started to implement this in his life, it was revolutionary for him. this newly founded ideology shifted caused him to rethink everything he thought he knew about life. sister altheia talks about the word "memento mori" which in latin means remember your death. ("rember the nun who wants you to rember you will die" by sister altheia moreau fye week three). people think if they avoid the subject of death and only focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings of life wed will only know happiness. many forget the reason life is so sacred is that it's finite. knowing we won't live forever adds value to every single day. jd kim states, “ the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is a part of our lives. it is always there, but it is how you respond to suffering from god. this is very important because you don’t become come close with god during your best days you become close duringyour darkest hours. these are the times god shows leads you down the right and gives you purpose or vocation. nick had battled with bad anxiety his whole life but once he implenting https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147209 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147209 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html glass half full thinking remembering death it changed everything. in finding god it allowed nick to find his true self and become his best version of himself to the word.(“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). nick started to treat every day we lived on this earth as a blessing and started acting like it. he stopped worrying about all the little things and instead enjoyed life for what it truly is. after nick had alleviated a lot of his old anxiety, it enabled him to capitalize on his god-given gifts. this allowed nick to find his true calling in life truly. figuring out what you are vips allows you to find out your true vocation on this earth. knowing your skills and true passions gives you a better indication of what your career should be. ("text: "navigating your career journey" (meruelo family center for career development by nd career site moreau fye week four). nick found out he was great with compassion and hearing people, so he became a physiatrist. he helped thousands of patients and made the community a better place. nick dealt with a lot in his life but persevered and defeated the obstacles that turned him into a great man. just like his mother said, at the end of the day, nick truly wanted to be remembered for being a good person. which i think we can all say confidently he did. reflection on summary nick had a very meaningful life but lets take a deeper look in defining his life. these are the most important reasons it was well lived. i think number one we can talk about is nick’s care for dignity. father hesburgh said “all that we cherish at the face of the great dream of america demands a dedication to the dignity of man, the god-given dignity to human beings” hesburgh thought no matter who you were that you deserved to be treated with human decedncy “hesburgh movie” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). nick his whole life was a https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtczn5rugnk https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8403168/ glass half full thinking caring person and treated everyone wih respect. no matter who you were he treated you with a certain level of respect. if more people had these qualities than it would be a world full of love and not hate with judgement. i think this trait is more important than any amount of fame or wealth you could attain. integration 3 march 4, 2022 what will my life well-lived look like? nobody knows! i have remarkably few concrete goals for my life. whenever i think about myself in the distant future, i cannot picture exactly what i will be doing, where i will be living, or who i will be living with. the one thing i do know is that i want my life to be fulfilling, or, in moreau-speak, i want to have a life well-lived. my personal definition of a life well-lived, like my goals, is vague. however, i think this can be beneficial. looking at one’s life from a wider perspective can be helpful to assess what is really important. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). getting caught up in the small, inconsequential details of life is distracting and prevents someone from living a life well because they cannot prioritize the things that really matter. the things that are most important vary from person to person. for me, the things i value the most are the relationships i have with the people i love, my education and career development, and caring for my own health and wellness. it is also important not to overthink where you are going in life. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). spending too much time analyzing oneself and meticulously planning can take away some of the beauty that comes with what is unknown in life. i will never have all the answers about my life, and that’s ok. in my opinion, it is nearly impossible to have a life well-lived without deep, meaningful interpersonal relationships. until i got to notre dame, most of my meaningful relationships were with family members. my parents, brothers, grandparents, aunts, and uncles are relentlessly supportive of everything i do. i have so much love for them. i had friendships in high school, but most of them were fleeting. i thought that i wouldn’t have as deep and close of a relationship with a non-family member until i found the person i would marry. that’s where i was mistaken. i have formed beautiful friendships here that i am certain will last a lifetime. coming to notre dame has helped me realize that i can form a deep connection with a total stranger and have them become one of the most important people in my life in just a few short months. they know me incredibly well already, evidenced in our week 5 conversation in which they pinpointed lifelong internal struggles i have had. (moreau fye week 5). showing love to others opens up your life to a host of beautiful experiences. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a "you" and themselves as part of an "us." we all need each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). love is not reserved for family members and romantic partners. a life well-lived includes showing love to all. educational and career pursuits are also critical to living a fulfilling life for me. there are people out there who may not be educated or have careers they particularly enjoy who live wonderful lives, but that’s just not me. so far, i am really enjoying my course of study at notre dame. “we also view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 6). i don’t know what i want to do with my career after my navy career commitment is over, but having an educational background in a subject i enjoy will give me numerous options for a fulfilling career. for example, one of the domer dozen was a political science student who used her degree as part of her journey to reforming the education system to be more equitable. (notre dame alumni association’s domer dozen moreau fye week 2). the final aspect i think is important to having a life well-lived is caring for yourself. it is impossible to give your entire life to the people you care about and your career and ignore your own needs without burning out quickly. school is stressful, so i have had to find ways to integrate self care for my own sanity. i work out multiple times a week, listen to music i enjoy frequently, and try to make sure i get enough sleep each night. simple acts of self-preservation help me to stay well enough to work hard for the things i am passionate about pursuing. i am unsure of what my acts of self care will look like in the distant future, but i imagine i will find a workout routine that fits well with whatever my life looks like, cook good food, and find other new activities that bring me joy and peace. part of the reason i chose to use the alternate prompt for this integration is that i don’t think i should get to write an idealized version of my own eulogy. i want my eulogy to be an honest reflection of my life from someone who loves and knows me well. i want whoever speaks at my funeral to be genuine and speak about their real experience knowing me, flaws and all. i hope i will have lived my life well and will try my best to leave a good impact on the world, even if it’s small. i don’t fear death. i don’t want to die now, that’s for sure, but i think that knowing i will die makes the living more precious. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she said. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). knowing my life is going to end at some point and i will leave a legacy in some form motivates me to pursue a life well-lived with positive relationships, a fulfilling career, and good health. there is still so much unknown ahead of me in my life, and i hope the best parts of my eulogy are things i cannot yet even imagine for myself. integration 3 moreau fye integration 3 a death well-died with the passing of , we mourn his death and call back to the amazing moments and aspects of his life. living a life of love and selflessness, he had a tremendous impact on everyone he touched, leaving the world a better place than it was when he entered it all those years ago. i hope that everyone here can learn from the well-lived life of jack and apply characteristics of his life to their own. jack exemplified a life well-lived, always creating environments that fostered love, care, and respect. jack worked to create these environments because he fully believed that everyone had the power to make a difference in the world. similar to what pope francis said, “the future of humankind isn’t exclusively in the hands of politicians, of great leaders, of big companies” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week seven), jack believed in everyone having the opportunity to play a role in humanity’s future, and always helped me believe my work was making a difference. one admirable trait about jack is his optimism. no matter how dire the circumstances, jack always seemed to find the hope and bright spots in life. jack thoroughly believed that “when the hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week six). in reaction to this common thought, jack always tried to focus on the things that we do have, not what we do not. in tough times, he focused on how great times would be once he got through them. whenever he caught me dwelling on one of my own mistakes or the way someone had wronged me, he would encourage me to put it aside and instead focus on my many blessings and how i can overcome my mistakes and hardships. i remember one particular conversation i had with jack when he was discerning how best to live a life well-lived. when discussing what his strengths and values were, he was surprised when i talked about his drive to act with purpose. i told him he loved two things, “people and purpose” (discernment conversation moreau fye week five). everything jack did, he did it with a purpose. he hated wasting time doing nothing, but he loved working with people on anything purposeful. working for something with a higher purpose than himself was of his key attributes and certainly defines his life as a life well-lived. jack taught me the importance of discerning my interests in the present and my goals for the future. when i struggled with what i wanted to do with life, he helped me break down my current interests and my future goals so i could make life decisions with utmost consideration of all aspects of life. he taught me that the more we know ourselves, the more we know what will truly make us happy and that we are good at, and the more we can use that to help others and the world (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). his words helped me make many great career decisions in life that have put me in the position i am today, and i thank him greatly for it. if you ask anyone what jack provided to any discussion, the most common answer would be joy. he brought joy to every conversation, making everyone more joyful who participated in the discussion. a conversation could never be too dark or sad for his joy to make a presence in the conversation. when i asked jack about how remained joyful so often, he responded “i ask myself two things about every choice i make ‘will this bring me true joy now?’ and ‘will this bring me true joy in 30 years?’ if it could do neither, then god was not calling me to it”. (“three key questions by michael himes” moreau fye week three). god not only led him to happiness but led others to happiness through his joy. now, he is with god in a place of eternal joy. another mission jack found himself in was the work to break down barriers between people, just like father theodore hesburgh (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). fr. hesburgh was an inspiration to jack and he worked to live a life continuing the mission of fr. hesburgh. jack, like fr. hesburgh, had the amazing ability to reach across lines and connect people of great differences. this allowed him to foster a community of love and cooperation with little of the division that so often characterizes our world. one final lesson we can learn from jack’s life is the importance of slowing down and reflecting. today, we slow down in honor of his life, but we can take this lesson and learn to slow down at times for the rest of our own lives. in a conversation i had with him, he once told me that “we’re never caught up with our lives” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i resonated with this quote from him heavily. in my own life, i find myself rushing from place to place, event to event, never stopping and reflecting. no matter how much i work i do, i’m always behind, always have more things to do to catch up. sometimes, we need to slow down our lives, and this is something jack did often. he found that slowing down his life made it easier to “catch up” because of those little bits of time he spent recharging and reflecting. in honor of jack’s amazing, well-lived life, i’d like us all to reflect on the lessons we can learn from jack and how we can continue to improve our community and our world and leave it better than we found it. wiser moreau april 18 2022 professor chan the next three years my mission in life is to find meaning and fulfillment in what i do. over my first year at notre dame i have learned more about myself and what that statement really means to me. exploring this has allowed me to realize the importance of creating meaningful relationships with the people around me. i have had a really hard time this year in college and it has highlighted the need for having bonds near me. i was able to turn to certain people for help because of these relationships. i believe that these bonds are characteristic of a life well lived. it is my mission to continue building these relationships so that i can give back to those that have helped me. i want to learn to be a more compassionate and patient person so i can reach out to strangers who look like they need a hand. it is through creating new relationships as well as strengthening the relationships already formed that i believe i can fulfill my mission. i also want to work in improving my mind so that i can be at peace with myself. doing this will allow me to find happiness and fulfillment, through bettering myself so that i can aid others. this mission statement will articulate my life not just the next few years but hopefully the rest of my life. focusing on the next three years and my time and college however, it starts with remembering and reflecting on what i learned in moreau. in week one we learned about the importance of slowing down and spending time away from our work. i know i often didn't hang out with friends because i said i had too much work to do. i need to remember the quote “whenever i finally force myself away from my desk for a day, of course, i find the opposite: the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often.” (moreau week 1) perhaps i need to give myself a break and at the same time, build those relationships that i need to fill my soul. it is in these relationships that “we’re in this together; we’re implicated as partners in the mix, sharing in the complexity and chaos of each other’s lives. as a result, when challenges occur, as they always do, walking together, you’re less likely to be arrogant and think you have all the solutions.” (moreau week 9) when thinking about my mission statement, it is largely inspired by the statement “christ taught the law of love of god and sent the holy spirit that we might live lives of love and receive the gift of eternal life.” (moreau week 10) this is ultimately what i'm striving to reach these next three years, and then the rest of my life. being able to show kindness to others around me even if i don't receive it back. i also want to focus on making sure the time i spend forming these relationships is mainly in person and not surrounded by technology. week seven reminded me how many are “cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people.” (moreau week 7) therefore it is a goal of mine to give time to people and do things in person. it is also important for me to remember, on those days when i don't feel like reaching out to others, what we learned from father hesburgh in week two. father hesburg stood up for what he believed in even when others were strongly against him. “nixon, he was shocked when father hesburgh stood up for the commision.” (moreau week 2) i should remember father hesburgh when i am having trouble standing up for others. i need to remember that it is part of building strong relationships. it is one thing for me to have relationships with other runners on the team who are similar to me, it is another to try and build them with different people at this school. i should strive to remember what we learned in week 11 that “in surrounding ourselves with those who agree with us we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree, which is accelerating political polarization.” (moreau week 11) it is just as important for me to build relationships with people who are different from me. this was highlighted further in the quote “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles.” (moreau week 12) i think this is the end goal. to get good enough at building relationships with people that are similar to me so that i am able to build them with people who are vastly different. week three was very eye opening towards forming my mission statement. this week a particular statement stood out to me. “that one constant vocation to be fully, totally, absolutely as human as i can possibly be. one way is to ask the questions; what gives you joy? what are you really good at? what do the people around you really need? (moreau week 3) i found what brought me joy and what i'm good at are related to my sport. i think the next three years i can use my sport to build strong relationships with the team as well as work on listening to problems that many of the girls are having. running is a very emotional sport and i can work towards being a better teammate for them. i also need to think back to week five when i had the opportunity to ask my mom a few questions. the answer to the question “what self-knowledge was confirmed or challenged?” (moreau week 5) is important in how i approach the next three years. i need to remember that while i'm in the zone moment and my desires are formed around running, that doesn't mean that should be my whole life. i need to remember that my family and friends will make my life much more meaningful and enjoyable. it is up to me to work to build those relationships over the years. another part of my mission was to treat myself with more kindness and awareness. trying to separate the bad thoughts from the good ones and learning to accept myself for who i am. over the next three years i want to focus on the quote “at times, asking what instead of why can force us to name our emotions, a process that a strong body of research has shown to be effective” (moreau week 6) putting in the time to write down my thoughts and feelings and really explore the complexities of my mind. in doing this i hope to find a sense of peace with myself. i also want to try and remember to take and breath and not stress about everything. i should remind myself that “with a degree from the university of notre dame, the opportunities are endless.” (week four) i will have a future once i leave here and stressing every minute will only make the process painful. overall this is my plan for the next three years to fulfill my mission to the best of my abilities. i will use what i have learned this year in moreau to remind myself to reach out to others as well as people close to me. integration eulogy moreau fye 3/3/2022 reflections on a life well-lived: the eulogy of as we send thomas’ funeral pyre out into duxbury bay for his soul to go up in flames, let us take a moment to reflect on his life and legacy. throughout his long, thorough life, thomas emphasized service to both his family and community, putting his wife and children, as well as those in their moment of need above himself. after attending the university of notre dame for his undergrad, where he majored in science-business, he pursued a career in medicine by attending medical school and specializing in orthopedic surgery. he followed in the words of father hesburgh through his occupation as a surgeon, as he “recognized that we all had a duty to serve and give back to the greater global community.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christian o’malley moreau fye week two). he found through both his studies and residency that medicine combined the general principles of what makes a good career, as his “career satisfaction depended in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills.” (“navigating your career journey” by murelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). medicine combined inspiration from his personal experiences with injuries as well as inspiration from his late grandfather, who passed in 2020. throughout high school and college, thomas suffered various injuries while playing several different sports. he had his first run-in with a hospital and the doctors that would inspire him when he dislocated his kneecap in a freak gym class accident during his sophomore year of high school. when he dislocated his shoulder six weeks into his freshman semester while playing club https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143021 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ water polo, he had to undergo his first surgery. he was very impressed with the calm demeanor of the doctors, as well as how they were able to talk him through the procedure, swiftly reconstruct his shoulder, and send him on his recovery journey. after this surgery, he was motivated to follow this career path, keeping in mind both his inspiration and his passion for giving back for others. he always remembered the words of st. thomas aquinas who said that, “the crown and summit of the whole of ethical life is what he calls caritas (charity), what the new testament describes as agape (self-gift).” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). he gave back to those in medical need, who came to him with debilitating injuries and left from his care progressing on their journey to health. in addition to his personal experiences, he was inspired by the life and legacy of his grandfather, who worked as an anesthesiologist in the small community of auburn, new york. at his grandfather’s funeral in january 2020, he was blown away by some of the stories of his grandfather that he heard from the people who attended. his grandfather would routinely be called in during the middle of the night to work emergency surgeries, and he always treated people with compassionate care and advocated on their behalf. thomas connected both of these inspirations with his own talents, finding the best career fit for himself. he was routinely described by his mother as always wanting to improve, as “she pointed out how he is extremely competitive with himself, and how he wants to maximize his potential in all of my activities. she found that he was most in the zone under high pressure situations…” (conversation with my mother moreau fye week five). surgery combined all of these aspects personal experiences, inspiration by relatives, and self-driven traits which led to his career choice and his resulting impact on both his local and global communities. https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1apqotbxxmzvylx2bp1uq5lx33wasnq9vulphp99kuno/edit?usp=sharing in addition to caring for those in medical need, thomas was also passionate about giving back to those who were disadvantaged through volunteering for the organization nuestros pequeños hermanos. nuestros pequeños hermanos is an organization that supports orphaned and abandoned children throughout latin america, giving them a place to live as well as an education and needed medical treatment. thomas became passionate about this cause after visiting the nph home in mexico in the eighth grade, as his heart was moved by the generosity of spirit of the children. during a week of bonding, they shared both their affection and minimal possessions. they inspired him to start an nph club at duxbury high school, and continue his involvement with the group throughout college and his career. as an orthopedic surgeon, he volunteered on many service trips through the one world surgery organization at nph honduras, performing routine surgeries for the disadvantaged people of latin america in order to drastically improve their quality of life. these surgeries made profound impacts on the lives of the people he treated, because they were previously not accessible for them because of their extreme poverty. through this service, he was inspired by both michael himes and aria swarr, as he saw what he could do to help and serve the global community through his career. st. thomas aquinas’ point showed him that “the crown and summit of the whole of ethical life is what he calls caritas (charity), what the new testament describes as agape (self-gift).” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). by putting the gifts of both his talent and career to use in charity, thomas was able to fulfill both his mind and his heart. however, since he was only specialized as an orthopedic surgeon, he was not able to help all people on these medical mission trips. although he was often disappointed leaving these trips because of this, he made sure to remember the words of aria swarr, as “(he) began to realize that what i could do was a blessing.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto magazine moreau fye https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji3pyemgglw week six). since he was able to help those who had skeletal and structural needs, he was still able to make a drastic impact in the lives of hundreds of people throughout the global community. above all, thomas was a man of family. he always made sure to keep a healthy balance between both his career and those closest to him, as he centered his schedule around his kids’ events in order to always be there for them. he loved both coaching his kids sports teams or sitting in the audience for concerts and academic extracurriculars. inspired by those “in silicon valley (who) observe an “internet sabbath” every week, during which they turn off most of their devices from, say, friday night to monday morning, if only to regather the sense of proportion and direction they’ll need for when they go back (to work).” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico eyer, ted moreau fye week one), thomas emphasized taking time off of his craft in order to pursue other important life paths and come back to work refreshed. his balance between career and family allowed him to have a significant impact on both his children and patients, giving him significant impact over those he loved and those in need. overall, thomas leaves this earth after making an incredible difference on those who he came into contact with, serving his family through his life at home, patients through his medical career, and disadvantaged people through charity. he was the antithesis of a warning from his holiness pope francis, who said that “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people. and often there is this habit, by people who call themselves "respectable," of not taking care of the others, thus leaving behind thousands of human beings, or entire populations, on the side of the road.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). thomas looked after others, both literally and figuratively, leaving a lasting legacy of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis care onto those he impacted as he transitions into the afterlife. rest in peace thomas, you will thoroughly be missed. integration three finding purpose in life can be a very difficult task. a life well-lived is something each and every person should search for throughout their journey of life. a life well-lived can be very difficult to define. this is why it is so difficult to find our purpose in life. in ’s life, there were only a few things that mattered. these included finding things he was passionate about and ways to impact his community in a positive way all while surrounding himself with people who loved him. life is most fulfilling when we are surrounded by those who love us because if we do not have them around, life is not as enjoyable. dan truly believed this as he was a great father to his 3 children as well as a loving husband to his wife. in addition, he made sure his work contributed to society in a positive way. “he contended that career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). dan took his love of math and stem into the field of engineering where he was able to work for uber and contribute to the self-driving cars that we know today. from a young age, dan found things that he was passionate about that carried with him into his adult life. “i have always believed that when i find something i am truly passionate about, i jump fully into it and get very excited about it. my mom tended to agree with me on this point. one thing she brought up in this conversation that she has always said is that i have a passion for math. even as a kid, i always had a passion for it and she has pushed me in the direction of my passions” (“discerning a life well-lived” by daniel schrage moreau fye week five). however, math was not the only thing he was passionate about. he also believed very strongly that every man and woman should have the right to equal opportunity in our society. he incorporated this value into his work where he was able to manage a wildly diverse group of people. he was able to do so because of his ability to get along with almost anyone. he was able to relate to people in a very intimate way. “we are trying to create one nation. it could very possibly be that we are verging through our institutions towards two societies, one black and one white, and that wouldn’t be america i don’t think” (“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). father hesburgh’s words were a great inspiration to as he tried to model himself after hesburgh in an effort to bring people together. his efforts to bring different groups of people together stems back to his value for being with his loved ones. “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). dan believed that everyone should be involved in society because that is how we build a brighter future. he was a role model to his children on how to respect others’ differences while still appreciating the people we are. dan’s passion for spending time with loved ones comes from one quote which is that “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). he understood that we only have a finite amount of time on this planet and he wanted to spend every second he could doing the things he loved while surrounded by the people he loved. dan understood the value of time. we cannot control time. time is going to pass by whether we like it or not. therefore, we should take advantage of our time by doing the things we love with those we love. despite his love for spending time with family and his community, also valued his alone time because that when he felt like he grew the most. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). however, despite this idea, it is important to avoid over-thinking. over-thinking often leads to problems and doubts that do not need to be a part of our lives. that is why he believed his time alone in his office could sometimes be just as valuable as time with loved ones. however, that time alone was only to come in short spurts as they are times for mental reflection. they are times to see the bigger picture of life rather than getting caught up in the little moments. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). dan believed this was a key to living a life well-lived. life is full of little moments to cherish and enjoy. however, these moments are often accompanied by moments of stress or anxiety. stress and anxiety are unavoidable in modern life. however, they do not need to take control of our lives. that is why dan believed that taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture of our lives is a key to living a life well-lived. dan died a happy man with his wife and three children at his side. he died as a strong role model, a caring father, and a loving husband. capstone integration | professor taylor | capstone integration my mission to heal a broken world i seek to learn as much as i can about this world as i move through it. over the past few months here at the university of notre dame, i have come to learn so many different things about myself and others. when i came here in the fall i was sort of debating whether or not i wanted to become a doctor. i met with my advisor several times to discuss the potential switch to computer science and even met with the head of the college of engineering to work out what my schedule would look like. since then, i have fully embraced the fact that i truly do want to become a doctor. the past year has really been informative on who i want to become because i believe that a little over a year ago i was probably at the lowest point in my life and now i can proudly say that i am the happiest i have ever been. notre dame has really exposed me to several different kinds of people and i have made tons of friends that all have the same goals as me. i want to be able to connect with people on a personal level and be able to help guide them through their journeys. i think that the more i come to learn in this world, the better off i will be, and the better off my family will be. as i go through the rigorous path of trying to become a doctor, i will experience several ups and downs along the way, and will be able to learn from these experiences. i think that experience is the connective tissue between the questions we have and the answers we seek. the harder we all work together to get through difficult times, the better we will all turn out to be for the betterment of the world. my mission is to learn about the best ways to help people, while also learning about the things that i actually care about. i love to learn about the sciences and love learning about different groundbreaking research that will eventually come to save the lives of millions (“university of notre dame mission statement” by notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). at the beginning of the second semester, i could really start to see things coming together in terms of my academic, social, and spiritual life here at notre dame. as the semester continued i came to realize that the people i have been experiencing here at college are not only going to be my friends here for the next three years, but for the rest of my life. friends have been the center of my life here at notre dame, and to quote steven reifenberg “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steven reifenberg moreau fye week nine). as i spend more time with others here, i have come to learn the importance of walking with others to help them and learning how to let others help me. this is central to my mission statement because as a doctor i am going to be constantly helping people as well as looking for advice from others to help me. by walking with others in our own individual journeys we also learn of the responsibility we have to slow down. from pico iyer during the first half of moreau, we learned that by “stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). appreciating what you have when at the moment is so integral to who you are and who you want to become. i have seen that some of the times that i https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ have been the happiest are when i am appreciating the little things that we possess. i have come to appreciate my family more, my friends more, and the gifts that i have been given by god more as a result of slowing down and learning what things i have. i think that over the next three years i am going to have a significant number of moments that i know that i will appreciate for the rest of my life. as an aspiring physician, there is a significant emphasis on giving yourself to others. by watching the hesburgh film, i really came to realize that by giving myself to others actually makes me not only a happier person but a better person. in the words of father hesburgh, the “price of belonging to everybody is probably belonging to nobody” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). although it is sad at times to not give yourself to only a specific person, it is so much better to be able to be of service to all people. i have found that a good career where i will be able to give myself to others for the rest of my life. according to the “navigating your career journey” article, a good career is one that“is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by luzzo, d.a., & severy, l.e. moreau fye week four). i am extremely interested in science, value my faith and helping others, and find that i am super skillful in paying attention to detail. this is going to be the perfect career for me and is going to fulfill my mission statement as i am going to be learning so much about science and people in general. in my mission statement, i also mentioned that in the darkest times of my life that i have gone through i have actually come to love and appreciate the things and the people that surround me. sister theresa aletheia claims that some of the darkest times actually lead us to realize all of the great things that come with this world and that without any sort of suffering the world would actually be very bland. sister theresa aletheia says, “in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i have found light in the struggles that i have endured and look forward to overcoming the things that stop me in the future. in having conversations with some of my family members over the past couple of years i have tried to learn about all the different types of things that i can do. this includes engineering, law, and becoming a doctor. after having these conversations, it has become very apparent that being a doctor is the thing that is right for me (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau first year experience moreau fye week five). although sometimes it does feel like i am limited to doing some things, and i have come to realize that there are many things that i cannot do, i take pride in accepting all of the things that i can do. in week six of the course, we heard the motivating story from dr. kim about having to deal with not having the ability to move his legs. despite having this knockback, dr. kim takes pride in the simple things that he can do every day and how he can make a lasting impact on this world. dr. kim says, “but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 not only are all of the things about helping others exciting to me over these next three years, but i am grateful for the opportunity to build a community where everyone can be included and simultaneously help each other. pope francis stresses the importance of building a world that is related in love and one that is centered around helping each other. the more that we build each other up, the happier we will be, and the more integrated into faith we will be (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted moreau fye week seven). i think that over these next three years accepting who i truly am is going to be one of the most important things that i can possibly do in order to find out who i am and to continue my mission. in the story by jacob walsh about being gay and catholic, the man realized that once he came to accept who he truly is, the better. i think that i will truly continue to embrace who i am over the next three years and will be a happier person because of it. jacob denied at first who he was, then came to realize that he was in denial of his being. jacob says, “it’s easy to see in retrospect that i was in denial. i didn’t know many people who were gay, let alone anyone who was both gay and catholic. it seemed to me that there was no future as a catholic if i was gay, but i did not want to walk away from the faith. this sexual orientation did not fit into any possible image i had for how my life could play out. being catholic did. so denial made sense” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). my mission will allow me to be the genuine person that i am and continue to help others along the way. in dr. paul blaschko’s “how to avoid an echo chamber”, he speaks about how important it is to have conversations that don’t keep our thoughts trapped in a cycle. by being open to other people’s ideas we are able to create a world that is better for all of us to live in. blaschko says, “these things obviously aren’t easy to do, but they’re well worth the effort both for ourselves and our potential connection to the truth and for those around us” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i will do my best to always make sure people’s voices are heard no matter the circumstance. similar to dean g. marcus cole, he is a black male who has experienced tragedies throughout his life. he says, “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something’” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). cole explains that despite having been oppressed, he still has the means to make a change and has tried his best to do so. over the next three years, i will strive to make a significant impact on notre dame and even the world through my mission of learning and helping others that are in need. i have really enjoyed my time here at notre dame thus far, and look forward to the things that i can accomplish over my next three years here. i will really try to stick to my mission of becoming a doctor, and cannot wait to see what the future holds. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ integration 1 john austin hatch moreau fye 3/4/22 prof. chan john austin hatch: a life lived friends, today we come together to celebrate the life of my brother and good friend, john austin. he has followed our parents austin and elizabeth into the hand of god. i’m sure mom is surprised he arrived first. she has probably mentioned how he hasn’t called her in a while. however, we should mourn the passing of our brother. we can also envy him, for he has ‘run the race’ and ‘kept the faith,’ as st. paul says. we can also be happy for him, and even for ourselves, who don’t have to deal with him any more. john austin always liked to say, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). now we don’t have to address the surprising amount of evidence compiled by his college roommates that suggests he applied this maxim more thoroughly than he should have. all joking aside, john austin was a compassionate individual. he lived out the words of pope francis, often asking his kids, “what is tenderness? it is the love that comes close and becomes real. it is a movement that starts from our heart and reaches the eyes, the ears and the hands.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). he was a man that loved up close, whether it was his children, siblings, students or friends. for him this meant loving with his deeds. as a father he constantly worked to have time for children and his wife, even if that justified more backpacking trips than it should have. as a teacher, he was committed to his role as mentor and example. many of his https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript former advisees are here today, and i am sure we can attribute his influence to them having their top collar buttons buttoned. personally, we always had our thursday call, where any topic was fair game. thursday nights might be when i miss him the most. let me return to the beginning. john austin was born way back in 2003, the second of seven kids, and herald of the coolest child in the family. there’s a reason he’s named after john the baptist. when he was seven, we left maryland for the first time, and moved to houston texas where our dad was the assistant headmaster of a new school. it was a short stay, only two years, but we learned a lot. as they say, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not.” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i think for ja the biggest take away was the spirit of adventure. we saw that the school was successful, unique, and awesome, even though it lacked so many things that other schools had. since our dad was one of the leaders, we knew when things went wrong, and how hard it was to have all that responsibility. still, from a young age, i learned, and i know john austin did too, that some things are worth the sacrifice. when we moved back to maryland, both of us attended the heights school, a small all-boys catholic school that i am sure most of you know about. there our education continued, in academic subjects and things that mattered. in the spirit of opus dei, the organization that ran the school, we learned how our work could be an offering to god. this john austin encountered later as well, in the work of aria swarr, whom he regularly read in his later life. the idea of always asking, “‘how can i use these 5 minutes?’ and i decided to pray to god for those 5 minutes.” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). i think this expresses his attitude well. nothing ever frustrated him as much as wasted time. similarly, he was a man of prayer. a daily communicant for over 60 years, he wanted everyone to know the joy of the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 sacraments. one time when we were at mass together after college, he came out of the church so fired up that he jumped on our car and started shouting. if you have any idea how quiet he was you will understand the uniqueness of this moment. john austin’s professional life was mostly devoted to his teaching career. a former president of notre dame, his alma mater, once said, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up.” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). and i promise you he was a builder, even if he could tear you down in three sarcastic sentences. beginning just after college, he began his teaching career at a startup school in new york. throughout his career, he would go on to help start four different schools in three states, working anywhere from the math department to director of admissions. he once told me that one of his best friends from high school had said to him, “i think something that’s difficult to say, but good for you to hear, is that you can be rather passive.” (william grannis). given what i have outlined here, this can be hard to believe. but john austin said that this moment had actually been one that he looked back to and always tried to work on. he proved himself by building himself up, and by building up others. i read in a book once that “two key virtues are crucial to give oneself away: wisdom and courage. wisdom is more than knowledge and wisdom preeminently knows that the other is other.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i am an old man, so i feel i can say, wisdom can only come with time. and before we have wisdom, we need to act with our own courage, but another’s wisdom. i mourn the loss of my brother's counsel, just as i mourn the loss of my father’s. but i know that even i have picked up a little wisdom over the years, and i can say that from examples of men like the one we honor today, that we only have so much to give, but with the power of god that mustard seed can be transformed into a great tree. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202?module_item_id=145988 it is in thanksgiving of a great tree of service that i can say, i thank god for my brother, john austin hatch. moreau integration spring james demaro moreau fye 29 april 2022 capstone integration assignment within the past year, i have begun to learn more about myself by asking myself important questions such as “what role do others play in my discernment?” (“week five irishcompass activity” moreau fye week five). through doing this i have learned more than i ever knew about myself and have begun to formulate my values into my own personal mission statement. taking a page out of notre dame’s mission statement, i have centered my own statement upon three core beliefs that will direct how i will live my life. as notre dame describes itself as a “university dedicated to the pursuit and sharing of truth for its own sake” (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week thirteen), i too would like to dedicate my life to the pursuit of truth and knowledge. additionally, since we as humans have a responsibility to help others, i will strive to encounter others through compassion. finally, i will be proud of who i am and will not be afraid to be my best and most true self. the search for knowledge and truth makes up a core component of my personal mission statement. while most people often desire to know that truth, there are many societal factors that can come to cloud our judgment on certain issues. as described by dr. paul blashko, echo chambers are extremely common on social media and can impair our opinions of certain truths. in an explanation of how these echo chambers work, blashko gives the example of a man using the internet. “online paul finds himself in an ideological bubble. this is because his social network is surrounded by people with similar political interests to him” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). it’s so important to stay away https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing http://nd.edu/about/mission http://nd.edu/about/mission https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd from these echo chambers due to their ability to cloud our perception of the world. by searching for unbiased news, i can experience the world to its fullest capacity. within my own life, i have attempted to read unbiased news and stay away from social media. i believe that so far this has helped me to experience other people, cultures, and traditions in ways that i wouldn’t have before. additionally, this has allowed me to discern which career path i will follow in my life. by asking myself important questions about my core values in life, i have thought hard about my major declaration. while “there is no “best major” out there there is a “best major for you.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). while i am still unsure of what i want to spend the rest of my life doing, searching through myself has helped to point me in the right direction. another crucial component of the search for truth is having the courage to act upon it. as father hesburgh showed us, it’s important to act upon what is right. “rome has spoken. it was censorship, and i told them no.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). as human beings, we have a responsibility to help those less fortunate than ourselves. thankfully, there are many people in our world that are already committed to this belief. “a number of ideas from those conversations have stuck with me. on the theological side, i was struck how every major religious tradition – including islam, hinduism, judaism, buddhism, and christianity –has as a central concern of connecting our lives with those who are downtrodden, the victim, the widow, the orphan, the poor” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). but still, there are still groups that desperately need help. this help doesn’t always have to come in the form of volunteering at a soup kitchen. rather, it comes through encountering others. according to marcus cole, a prominent civil rights activist, racial persecution is real and many people are https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing completely unaware of it. “as an african-american man, i have had the experience of being pulled over by a police officer, with no apparent or expressed reason for the stop. i have been berated and verbally abused, without receiving a ticket or a warning” (“i am george floyd. except i can breath” by marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). as marcus cole hints at, we have a duty to help others. to do this, we must encounter others. only by truly experiencing others can we come to understand their struggles and difficulties. this can also be done through education and coming to learn how others live. in the case of father gregory boyle, he comes to encounter the gangs of la by caring for them and coming to see them for who they truly are. in one such example, father greg experiences the compassion of the gang members who are often seen by outsiders as heartless killers. “do me a paro, g? he says. you tell flaco that gato from gang says o hopes he gets better. i will do that, i tell him, with a smile, and a real admiration for the stretch this represents” (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). by directly encountering the gang members, father greg is able to spread compassion and recognize their human dignity. this is an ability that i strive for in my own life. while i may never have the opportunity to encounter others in the way father greg did, i can work to educate myself and others in order to spread compassion and love. the final component of my mission statement is that i will never be afraid to be the best possible version of myself. most of our unhappiness in life stems from our inability to accept ourselves as noted by pico iyer. “all the unhappiness of men,” the seventeenth-century french mathematician and philosopher blaise pascal famously noted, “arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). once we are able to come to terms with who we are as people, our lives will be exponentially better. when jacob walsh was able to come to terms with his own https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/16287 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ sexuality in light of his religion, he felt an incredible burden lifted from his shoulders. “when i arrived home, the stars were out. i stood by the car for a few minutes in the cold, looking at the sky. thank you, i whispered. if i had not been attracted to the beauty of that character, the film wouldn’t have moved me as deeply as it did — i would have not been able to recognize the truth it conveyed” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). only by accepting ourselves as people will we ever come to find true joy in our lives. as explained by father michael himes, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). to find this joy, i must also change my worldview and live in the present. according to a study by tasha eurich, those who are more self-reflective often have worse mental health than those who are not. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). by becoming the best possible version of myself, i will be able to experience this state of joy rather than just fleeting happiness. by loving ourselves, i believe that we will all be able to find this central joy within our lives. while i may be a ways off from achieving my mission statement, by creating one i can better set realistic goals and help to outline the principles that i would like to hold in utmost importance in my life. by using the information from my moreau classes, i better understand what beliefs i hold in high regard. by acting on my mission statement, i hope to help change myself and the world for the better. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/16272 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ integration 4 april 28, 2022 finding my life well lived it is my mission to grow my relationship with god through all aspects of my life. i will dedicate everything i do to him. i am here to make the most of the one life i have been given. my goal is to help others succeed in all that they want to do in life. i am not involved in things for monetary profit. i work to bring joy to people around me and because it is what god would want me to do. i strive to show the world what it means to be a loving catholic. my relationships with family and friends will be held in the highest regard. i will try to bring people together to heal during times of suffering and help them find ways to move forward after tragic events. the people around me will push me to my mental and physical limits to assist me in becoming the best person i can be. their knowledge of the world will be used to advance my wisdom. i will be someone that people can count on to stand up for the marginalized when they face adversity. i may not be the face of the movement to help those struggling, but i will always be there to aid them in advancing their cause. i will base my life on the ways that christ would want me to live and strive everyday to follow his lead. my mission statement will help guide me through the ups and downs of the next three years and the rest of my life. it will lead me to make educated decisions. in today’s world “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). it is important to have all the information before making a decision especially when the decision could impact so many other people around you. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ my mission statement can also help calm me down when i am stressed about where my life is going. i often think, “is this really what i’m doing with my life?” (“hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). by using the tools i have learned this year like reflection and prayer, i can ease my worries and understand that god has a bigger plan for me. it will also help me discover what truly brings me joy because, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). there are many things in life that bring short term happiness, but throughout this year, i have discovered that family and friends are the ones that bring you true joy. being away from home has been a great experience, but it has also made me appreciate even more the people back home who helped me get to this point. in addition to using my statement to calm me down, it will help me enjoy the process of growing up. i want to view college more as planning for a trip because “usually planning a trip is not a quick process depending on the nature of the trip but hopefully it’s also a bit fun and rewarding, especially if you end up having a really great time!” (“navigating your career journey” by muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). one thing that my oldest brother always tells me is, “you’ve worked so hard to get where you are now, so enjoy the fact that you have achieved your dreams” (week 5 irishcompass activity moreau fye week 5). that does not mean i should stop working hard, but i do need to sit back and embrace where i am at in life more often. my mission statement can also be used as a constant reminder to help others because i am so blessed. we need to “focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/17101 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/17101 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ week 6). we all need each other to make it through this crazy life, “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). the more we help each other, the better the world will be for the generations after us. we need to show younger people how to love everyone no matter how different we are because “children can be incredibly resilient, especially when given structure and love” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). kids will follow our lead and show love if we teach them how. i have also learned this year that we as christians need to do more than just follow what the bible tells us. we need to be leaders and show everyone how to treat others. it can be hard at times because it might not be the most popular thing to do, but “one of the essential tests of social justice within any christian community is its abiding spirit of inclusion” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). talking about doing good in the world is not enough. our actions will always speak louder than our words. i have also learned that the best way to broaden my ideas is to surround myself with people who do not think the same way i do. if i get caught in an echo chamber, then “the worry seems to be that in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we're losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). i do find myself in an echo chamber at times and that makes it harder for me to understand where people are coming from when they disagree with me. that is why “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). even just meeting people at notre dame from different states has opened my eyes to many new things. notre dame has definitely changed me in just one short year. i hope my mission statement, just like notre dame’s, is inspired by the “three characteristics of roman catholicism that image jesus christ, his gospel, and his spirit” (“the university of notre dame mission statement” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 13). while my mission statement is one useful tool, i still believe the best way to live a life well lived is to live like jesus would want us to and always help out others whenever possible. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ moreau capstone moreau capstone living a life well-lived my ultimate goal in life is the improvement of lives. this vague statement includes myself, the people around me, and the environment that all life depends on. the environment is the source of all materials used by animals, so first and foremost i support the protection and reclamation of important resources like waterways. some of this is done through hands-on work, like the work i have done volunteering and working for the us forest service surveying and reclaiming waterways in close proximity to past mining. projects like these benefit everything from macroinvertebrates that depend on metal-free water to the largest predators that drink the water. the trickle down effects of just freeing a stream from excessive acid mine drainage can restore ecosystems tremendously. this improvement leads to more enjoyable recreation in the areas, making people happier and boosting local economies. the benefits of improvements to ecosystems start small and elemental, but can make whole communities happier, including myself. another way that i could bring joy or at least decrease suffering is in my desired profession in the medical field. if i can make it through all it requires, i can help others to be healthier by treating the whole person (not simply looking at symptoms). making other people happy is what makes me happy, along with outdoor recreation, so in my life i try to achieve this wherever i can. this was my mission statement that i made a few weeks ago based off my interpretation of the (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week http://nd.edu/about/mission 13), and i still stand by every word of it. it is not a full encompassing statement for my entire life, but rather gives an insight into my values and examples of how i want to live my life. reflection is a good tool to ground yourself in your world, and set yourself up for success. the article from ideas.ted.com why we need to slow down our lives suggests: “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down.” this quote is in response to what the author saw during their trip to google’s headquarters. the author was fascinated to see trampolines and creative spaces in an office of a highly successful company in charge of vast amounts of data and innovation. it seems that even the companies that drive the world forward at the fastest pace have discovered that time without screens and the internet helps to promote creative thinking and motivate workers. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) if the top tech companies acknowledge the need for reflection and down time, maybe we should too. inspiration is everywhere at nd, but especially prevalent in the legacy of father hesburgh. here is my favorite excerpt from the documentary about him: “this whole committee was a put on, and here we have a couple of democrats, some republicans, and an independent priest, and we got you to agree on civil rights? and he said, mr. president, we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we are all just fishermen.” father hesburgh was able to find a common hobby and use it to unite a seemingly hopelessly divided group of people. the quote brings forward the commonalities of our fellow humans and shows that even groups that were staunchly against each other were able to talk through an agreement by listening to each other https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ and relating to them on even the smallest of things like fishing. i hope to use my skills to bring people together like father hesburgh did. (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) pondering tough topics about living a good life can be beneficial. i found (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) to be particularly intriguing due to the different approach this nun has on death. she is a teacher of momento mori, which in latin means “remember your death.” this was a bit surprising because it seems like catholic teachings usually focus on resurrection and the life of the world to come. the slightly darker tone is meant to have good meaning though. sister teresa aletheia noble stresses that since death in this world is inevitable, we need to focus more on it every day, and act accordingly with the acknowledgement that our time here is limited. similarly, (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) suggests “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." we also view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” this quote strikes me the most because it reinforces my choice of major and desired career path. biology is certainly not the easiest major, and there are certainly times that i feel that i would be better off in an “easier” major. this helps me to remember that doing what i enjoy the most is worth it even if it seems way harder than other alternatives. the (“week five irishcompass activity” moreau fye week 5) that i completed with sam kaczor affirmed my perception of my values and my desired course of study. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing in her ted talk, tasha eurich says: “studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content. however, grant and others have also come to realize there’s no relationship between introspection and insight. this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” this quote sounds a little oxymoronic at first, but in the context of the article it makes more sense. the article suggests that introspection is unrelated to how much one knows themselves. it relates more to how at peace you are with yourself and your current situation. people who think deeply about themselves are likely doing it out of sorrow or confusion, hoping for a magical answer to their problems. the article suggests that we should focus on what we are and what we want, rather than why questions. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) improving the lives of others does not take a huge trek to achieve. i do not know much about the background of the story from which the chapter jurisdiction is taken, but it simply does not matter. each of his self-contained stories have vast meaning that does not require one to dig too deep to see. the story from the diner, where the two gang members are incredibly uncomfortable walking into a diner comprised mostly of “proper” families with money, is rather startling in how quickly one’s friendliness can make someone feel welcome. the waitress’s change from hostile to treating the strangers like friends eases any pre-existing tension, and brings both parties together. in my life, i hope to use my experiences as well as ones i read about to impact lives for the better. (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7) when i http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00223980.2010.528072 https://libres.uncg.edu/ir/uncg/f/p_silvia_evaluating_2011.pdf https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/16529 wrote what i hope my eulogy will be like in week 8 of moreau, it helped me to reflect on how the choices i make on seemingly insignificant days can alter someone’s life. (“integration three assignment: write your own eulogy” moreau fye week 8) the quote “i also learned that children can be incredibly resilient, especially when given structure and love; that repression and unemployment and illness all undermine one’s sense of their inherent human dignity; that u.s. policies reverberate around the world and can dramatically impact national policies that impact people who have no interest in politics; and that maybe, just maybe, it wasn’t so bad to have big dreams, even if they fell short, as clearly they did in my case” explores the realizations that steve reifenburg came to over his time at the orphanage in chile. the resiliency of children is often underestimated, and he believes that they can be very resilient when given the opportunity. when they are empowered and supported, they are capable of much more than is expected of them. i hope to use this knowledge too to aid me in my efforts to help others and myself in life. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenburg moreau fye week 9) i found this part of the reading from week 10 to be quite interesting because it is applicable to any situation in which someone is questioning god or what he thinks of you. [“i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either.” he paused for a moment. “god doesn’t make shit.” he told me that i could not convince myself that god loved me. “you can ask him to show you, though. and you can pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved.”] the extremely candid response from the priest put the student at ease, and helped him https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing to see that he really is loved by god. i may not have to face the exact dilemma that brought this up, but i am sure that at some point it will be good to remember. (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10) right now in my life, the best way for me to grow into an adult who makes a large positive difference is to absorb everything i can, and critically analyze everything. echo chambers, as discussed in (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11), only convince you to stay set in your ways and close you off from outside perspectives. i also need to regard all people in the manner that the holy cross demands: “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail. thus, wherever through its superiors the congregation sends us we go as educators in the faith to those whose lot we share, supporting men and women of grace and goodwill everywhere in their efforts to form communities of the coming kingdom.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week 12) if i can treat everyone with equal respect, be open minded yet firm in my morals, and act with courage on behalf of my morals, then i can live a life well-lived. https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ moreau capstone chizoma e.a duru moreau capstone my journey to the woman i want to be “how do i pursue a life well lived” throughout the semester, i have been on a trip to discover “how to pursue a life well lived”. in my interactions with different aspects of my life such as the morau modules, my peers and those closest to me i believe i have finally started discovering and formulating my plan to a life well lived. from being cognisant of my need to step away from the noise, to realizing my position as a black woman up until maintaining gratitude for even my smallest wins. i strongly believe that even through planning i have begun the road to ultimately having lived a good life and becoming a woman i would be proud to have been. my first step towards discovering how to pursue a life well lived was being able to step back from the noise from academics, extra curricular activities, family squabbles and take in the beauty that life truly has to offer. more importantly, through this process i got to decide what i wanted to do with my life. the quote “ it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer) really got me thinking about the importance of stepping outside your normal busy pictures and searching for what the bigger goals for my life was. through this i was able to finalize what i really wanted to do with my life and how i wanted to use economics and politics to make the african continent a better place. doing this i also realized that to achieve my goals, i needed to be a leader. i did not just need to be any leader, i needed to be a leader that worked to make transformative change for the greater good. for this, it was very instrumental that i got to interact with a movie concerning father hesburg and his life as one of the most exceptional president’s of notre dame. a quote that has particularly stuck with me during my notre dame journey has been “i decided if i was going to be president i had to shake things up” father hesburgh ( “hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley). this quote taught me that as a leader, it’s not about following the status quo, it is by sticking by your values and doing the right thing no matter what. that’s the kind of leader i want to be. in line with being a leader that wanted to help my people, i started discovering what kind of woman i wanted to be and how my career played a role in that career path. despite the fact that i am still uncertain about what particular career path to follow, i was able to decide on my major and discover how my major could help the community in which i come from. the quote : “all too often, we raise questions about vocational discernment as if everything depends on what i want and what i love when in fact, at least as important perhaps more important in making a good vocational decision is what do the people around me need? what is it that the community requires, that i am able to supply? we need to be able to listen to others about their needs.” (father micheal himes)(“three key questions” by father micheal himes), was really instrumental in helping me discover this path and the importance of this path in helping the people from my community. however, with dreams as big as mine, i realized that i needed to be comfortable with things not always going the way i planned them to go. i needed to become more flexible with my plans and realize that they are subject to change. that way i would become adaptable and know that no matter what the world threw at me it was nothing beyond my control. the quote “i realized that i needed to learn the art of flexibility”.(“my reflection with my mother” by ft aidevo duru) my reflection with my mother made me aware of the fact that adaptability was a key factor on my leadership journey and on the journey towards becoming the woman i wanted to be. asides from flexibility, another important value i needed to uphold would be gratitude. getting to interact with jihoon kim’s story really showed me this, this was because i realized that amidst the hard times and the trying times of discovery i was going through at that time, i needed to remember when jihoon kim said “ will use these 5 minutes, to not just pray about myself but pray for others, pray for my loved ones and i will utilize these 5 minutes and do something about it instead of just focusing on what we can not do.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr)this helped me to not focus on the things i wasn’t sure of yet, or what i didn’t know, or what i couldn't have but instead i was inspired to focus on things that i could do and remain grateful for that. instead, i channeled this focus towards helping others. my quest to help others made me realize that in life i had just gotten lucky, and made me focus on interacting with the people that may not have been as lucky and even just benefitting from interactions with people all around me. i started seeking volunteer opportunities more as well as spending more time chatting and connecting with my peers. this was all thanks to pope francis's quote which said “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.”(pope francis)(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences). in line with my volunteer work, i had started off with helping the little children that i was instructing on conflict resolution, but in my interactions with them i started learning way more than i thought i would from children that i thought were too young to teach me anything. from them i learned about kindness and friendship. this was similar to the quote: “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well.” from (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg) notwithstanding my plans for a greater good, there were always some setbacks i was worried about, especially pertaining to my identity as a black, african, woman in the united states of america. these made me think of two perspectives, the part other people had to play concerning perpetuating prejudices against me and what i could do to prevent these occurrences from happening. for the part other people had to play concerning my prejudices the quote “these privileges and the white fragility that results prevent us from listening to or comprehending the perspectives of people of color and bridging cross-racial divides. the antidote to white fragility is on-going and life-long, and includes sustained engagement, humility, and education.”( “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by (dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost)this not only acknowledged that i wasn’t the only one sharing these concerns but also how people on the other side of the spectrum could handle their privilege. concerning how i could prevent these prejudices the quote: ” yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149932 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149932 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149950 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149950 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149967 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149967 can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us.” (dean g. marcus cole)( 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.”by (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school). helped me as well. i realized that in my position at notre dame and in my position as a black woman who can breathe, it was crucial that i did everything in my power to prevent traumatic experiences like what happened to george floyd from continuing to happen to black people. lastly, through all my learning and unlearning i discovered that in my fight for the greater good there will be times when people do not agree with me. sometimes, those people will be wrong and sometimes i will be wrong. no matter the circumstances, the woman i want to be respects other parties and their opinions. she reflects even when she is offended and comes forward with the best approach possible. i learned this from the quote: “keep an eye on our own motives, when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with and we find others around us supporting and encouraging us to do so we need to take a step back and reorient ourselves.” ( “how to avoid an echo chamber” by (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd)this also taught me that because everyone agrees with you doesn’t make you right. “through hard work coupled with reflection and passions and beliefs coupled with open mindedness, she believes that the journey to a life well lived is underway. she aims to be busy making positive impacts and spreading joy but she also aims to create time to wait, breathe and smell the roses.”(“personal mission statement” by ). this was a concluding quote from my personal mission statement, and i intend to follow through with it. my aims and my dreams to be a better woman for my community and help achieve the greater good comes with learning, unlearning, reflection and understanding and i plan on achieving this one day at a time. hopefully on this path i have outlined towards pursuing the good life, i would likewise start the journey to the woman i would love to be. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/150004 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/150004 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149984 capstone integration moreau fye april 27, 2022 road map to a life well lived throughout this semester of moreau, i learned different steps in order to live my life to the full potential through a vast number of class discussions, readings, and videos. during the 13 weeks of this semester, i was able to be guided through a path that of a fulfilling life. i was able to reflect on and share ideas of how with others, gaining valuable information. these included what a life well live is, what to consider while trying to live a life well lived. i also was able to learn the struggles and obstacles that i must endure and the skills i will need to have in order to live a life well lived. for me, living a life well lived includes staying true to my personal mission statement. pulling from my mission statement, i “strongly believes in equality for all” and “stand up against hate”. i also “believes that having an open mind and taking risks” (week 13) is important to living a good life. the first step into living a life well lived is understanding what a live well lived and what comes along with it. in order to do so, we must answer a few questions. the first thing to consider is “what is the source of your joy?” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die, week 3). it can be very hard to figure out what brings true joy, but important to figure out. it is much easier to find out what gives us instantaneous joy, like being with friends and family, but the true challenge is finding what gives long term happiness. in order to does so we much ask ourselves “what is something you are doing when you lose track of time?” and “if you knew you couldn’t fail, what might you most like to do?”(exploring a life well lived, week 4). putting these questions into perspective allows us to truly understand what gives us joy. if we find ourselves choosing to play and listen to music in our free time, maybe the best choice for our life is to pursue a life in music. choosing what gives us the most joy can be scary. it may be worries about money or social approval, but we must know it is our life and we should choose what gives us joy. additionally, to what finding what brings us joy, in order to live a life well lived we must find what brings us inspiration. one thing that inspires me is making a positive impact on others. this is like father ted. father ted was driven by the impact he was able to make on others (hesburgh, week 2). if it is making an impact on others like father ted or not, we must find what motivates us. this will ultimately help guide us to a life well lived. once we can find what brings us joy, it is important to consider the people we surround ourselves with. being able to live a life well live includes finding and sustaining meaningful relationships. it is very difficult to get through life without people who care about us to help. one characteristic of a meaningful relationship is a relationship with someone that supports us. many people we meet can be very judgmental about who us, making us feel like we should be someone we are not. a meaningful relationship is one where we can get support and encouragement to be ourselves true self. the support of relationships allows us to more easily overcome our struggles. in the video, pope francis said, ‘“that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone”’ (why the only future worth building includes everyone, week 7). this is saying we do not have to go through our lives by ourselves. it is much easier to get through the lows when we are with people who are there for us. it is also much sweeter to celebrate our successes with the ones who care about us. we need to remember that we never have to get through anything alone. many times, these relationships also guide you to making different decisions. meaningful relationships allow us to ask people you respect and trust for advice. many times, the people that know us, know us better than ourselves. i was able to talk to my ra for advice in selecting a major. this decision seemed daunting to me at first, but after talking to someone i respected and trusted, i learned that it was not that big of a deal. my ra said it was “very easy to switch majors” and that he himself “switched his major 3 times” (rogba ayoola, week 5). it is important to seek advice from the people around us, most likely it will guide us to the right decision. while we gain lots of support from the ones around us, in order to live a life well lived we also must reciprocate that care and be there for others. in steven reifenberg ‘s lesson, he emphasizes that we must “to accompany another – whether a friend in need, a colleague, a sick child or a dying parent” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together, week 9). a meaningful relationship goes both ways. not only can we take the support from others, but we must also give back in order to live a life well lived. while striving for a life well lived, we are guaranteed to come upon obstacles. one obstacle is managing obligations. although throughout our lives we have many obligations we must accomplish, one obligation we have is to take breaks and relax. “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break” (why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer, ted, week 1). we will come across many different stressors that it is important to take a break, so we do not burn ourselves out. another obstacle we will face are personal struggles such as self-doubt. in a video by the grotto, we learned of the story of dr. kim. dr. kim’s got into a very serious accident, injuring him and pausing his pursue of becoming his dream of a sushi chef. this caused lots of self-doubt. he believed he would never be able to live out his dream. dr. kim was able to overcome this adversity and eventually become a professional sushi chef (5 minutes, week 6). we must learn from dr. kim and be able to overcome personal obstacles such as self-doubt. this will lead us to living a life well lived. this can be very difficult, but by seeking the right help and support it can be done. as we pursue a life well lived, we must learn a few different skills that will help guide us. the first skill is to embrace diversity and be open to everyone. many times, we feel uncomfortable in situations and hope to be embraced by others. this means we must also seek to embrace others. this relates to the story written about in the grotto article on being catholic and gay. in this article they write, “he embraced the church’s teaching about marriage and sexuality. and he accepted and embraced the fact that he was attracted to men. he did not fit into any of the categories i had constructed” ("growing up gay and catholic” (jacob walsh, grotto, week 10). in this situation the young man felt like an outsider in the community he believed he belonged to. although he was different than many of the people in this community, nobody should feel like an outsider. it is our job to embrace others. this action of being inclusive to everyone is a step to living a life well lived. many times, embracing others means sticking up for others. it is not okay to be a bystander and watch hate happen. in order to live a life well lived we must stand up for what we think is right. in the holy cross mission statement they state, “christ was anointed to bring good news to the poor, release for prisoners, sight for the blind, restoration for every broken victim. our efforts, which are his, reach out to the afflicted and in a preferential way to the poor and the oppressed” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. ,week 12). this emphasizes the importance of not waiting for problems to find us, but to seek problems out that we want to solve. in order to live a life well lived we must be selfless and always have others in mind. in order to do so, we cannot trap ourselves in a echo chamber. an echo chamber is when we intentionally surround ourselves with people of similar backgrounds, beliefs, and identity (“how to avoid an echo chamber” (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd, week 11). if we find ourselves in an echo chamber it is impossible to be able to understand others and be able to help and support. avoiding echo chambers leads us to living a life well lived. living a life well lived may not always be the easiest choice, but it will be the most fulfilling. using the skills, we learned throughout moreau, we have been able to envision a path to such life. it is now our job to utilize these skills and put lessons into action. we must find what brings us joy, surround ourselves with meaningful relationships, and learn how to embrace others even when they are different from us. most importantly we must stay true to ourselves and our mission statement. the cumulation of my freshman year, and notre dame’s moreau course, has helped me to further strengthen my mission statement and personal beliefs. i have formed many important friendships and learned valuable life lessons that have allowed me to reflect upon what truly values me, and what is important to me. “i strive towards living a good life, and fulfilling my expectations for myself” (week 13: my mission statement). a good life is something that can mean vastly different things to different people. but to me, one thing that i find extremely important is connecting with others. i believe that “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” (week 7: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences ). moreau has helped to show me this, as well as my formation of friendships here. many times, my friends and i think about how much our lives have been impacted by the fact that we chose to come to notre dame and be friends with one another. we often wonder how our lives would have been different if we had been friends with other people. i believe that i am who i am today because of my friends and my experiences, and my friends are who they are because of their past and present relationships with others. in this way, there is a ripple effect that spreads out to everyone, even beyond those you have met, or even plan on meeting. my experience at notre dame thus far has also taught me to “strive for self-growth, as well as being more empathic. i like to see new perspectives on things and offer advice” (week 5: a conversation with a friend). i learned very early during my time here, that while the “golden” rule of treating others how you want to be treated is a very important lesson to learn, it isn’t always true. instead, “we need to see others as other people! not to project on them what we would like if we were in their shoes because we are not in their shoes” (week 3: "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" (ruth graham, ny times)). coming to college, and being in an environment of so many different opinions, i have realized that “the reason things are important is because we give them meaning.” (week 8: eulogy). i have given value to specific things in my life that other people may not have, which can cause differing opinions on things and sometimes result in disagreements. i’ve learned that the most important thing to recognize when these disagreements arise, is that just because someone views something differently, or does something a different way, doesn’t make one right or wrong, or necessarily better than the other. this conclusion was then reaffirmed when i learned that echo chambers lead to “losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree.” (week 11: “how to avoid an echo chamber” (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd)). in many ways, where we are from is an echo chamber, and coming here has allowed me to break free from that, and grow from that. i have also developed a stronger sense of self-worth during my time here, which i believe is key to living a good life. i found that during week 10 i resonated with the fear that jacob walsh had. his self thought that: “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” was one that i had found myself thinking at the beginning of freshman year (week 10: "growing up gay and catholic” (jacob walsh, grotto)). however, as i began to embrace vulnerability with my friends, i learned that this thought was far from the truth. furthermore, the unconditional love my friends have given me has helped me to learn self-love, and recognize that “unproductive and upsetting emotions… can swamp us and impede positive action” (week 6: “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences)). additionally, i’ve learned that i am blessed with many opportunities to help others and it's important that i use my opportunities to help others. i think that father hesburgh stands as a good example of this. “as far as the catholic church goes, he was a bit of a renegade to rules. he used common sense” (week 2: "hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley)). i view father hesburgh as a role model. he saw what needed to be done to make the world a better place, and used his privilege to help others. this for me can appear differently, whether that means volunteering or activism in your community. however, i also believe that it's important to understand the idea of accompaniment; “to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard.” (week 9: “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” (professor steve reifenberg). i’ve learned this at notre dame, and also through service opportunities in high school. sometimes, privilege can cause people to think that they are better than others, however, that is far from the truth. week 12 has taught me that “my education and position… place me in a position to do something about” injustice in society (week 12: “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school)). lastly, i have learned that there is beauty in balance, and that balance is key to living a good life. while it is true that i came here to learn more about topics that i am passionate about, and i “also view studying what you love as highly practical,” i also came to notre dame to form life-long friendships and grow as a person (week 4: "navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development). it can be difficult to find the balance between schoolwork, time to reflect, and time to be with those important to me. but this is something that i have gotten better at this semester by more effectively managing my time and planning things out more. however, i’ve come to realize that oftentimes, it's the unplanned moments in life that are the most important. furthermore, while we do have busy schedules, “the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda” (week 1: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted). the balance between planned and spontaneous is something that i believe is key to living a good life, and hope to further develop. i believe that a life well-lived is one of pursuing self-fulfillment. self-fulfillment comes from self-growth and reflection, having a strong community of people you love, giving back to others, and maintaining balance in one’s life. my experiences throughout my time at notre dame will help me to achieve these goals and continue to develop as a person and a student. jennixa de la cruz theo helm moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the joyous life of jennixa jennixa was a force to be reckoned with. she did not let anyone tell her she was not able to succeed in life because of the environment she grew up in. many people thought she was going to be pregnant at 16 working a minimum wage job all her life and staying in her hometown. that is what many people thought how many young women from lawrence were going to end up. jennixa was one of many that was able to get out of the small city and start her journey of independence and finding her true meaning of her life. she wanted to be a legacy and a leader for the future generations of first-generation children. even if she had a successful life there were many challenges that she had to face to get to where she did. one of them was trying to discover herself while she was in college at the university of notre dame. when she first received the acceptance letter from the university, she could not believe her eyes. she was thrilled to be part of the community at the university of notre dame but was also nervous as she has only been around latinos her whole life. she experienced imposter syndrome in her first semester but by the second semester she finally found her group of friends and had survived one semester of classes. though she knew she needed to reflect on what her future meant. she thought that she needed to be prepared for anything and plan her next goals. then she realized that she needed to slow down her life and just focus on the present. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond,” and instead of focusing on what is in front of us we often just pass through it and let life happen without acknowledging it (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). jennixa recognized that she needed to slow down her life and just focus on the present moment as that moment would shape her and her future self. she knew she needed to stop focusing on the future since she did not know what would come from it. to focus on herself she often thought about who she was as a person. she asked her best friend what she was perceived as in the eyes of others. her best friend told her her biggest value in life is her determination in life and having so much passion for her interests. she also mentioned that she cared too much about what people thought of her and that she shouldn't, which caused jennixa to think about herself more and not what others think of her (moreau week five). jennixa thought she should live more for herself and not try to please others. jennixa tried to keep her head high and just let life run its course. but there were often obstacles in the way of her living an easy and simple life. she knew life was not meant to be simple or easy, but she hoped that she wouldn’t have to face the problems or issues she did in a world where many of those issues were resolved. she learned that these obstacles do not determine or control her life. they are just another challenge she would have to face and get passed. she learned that she needed to focus on what she “can do already instead of what [she] cannot do and what [she does] not have yet” as those are what we can control (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). she thought that the only way she could have control over her life and not have the universe control it for her was to be patient in certain situations and just to not stress over things she was not able to control. she learned to meditate and just take time for herself to better her mental health and just for her life. she also learned that the best way that she could have control over her life was to pick the best major. she learned that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for” her. (navigating your career journey moreau fye week four). she always wanted to help people and she loved science. she had wanted to be a doctor since she was 5 years old. she chose neuroscience and behavior on the pre-med track because she wanted to assist in discovering the parts of the brain more. she always thought about helping people and aiding in cures for many mental diseases. in her time at notre dame, jennixa learned about one of the previous presidents of the university. he helped shape history and he was father theodore hesburgh. “father hesburgh was somebody who could bring those people together and find ways that they can get in the same room, be respectful, and come to some kind of resolution” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week two). when learning about father hesburgh, jennixa thought she wanted to inspire people as he did. she wants to help shape the future for my inclusivity and equity for all. she thought that the best way to do that was to succeed in the school and earn a voice that will impel people to listen. she wanted to end discrimination for all especially to poc as they face the worst kind of discrimination. she had experienced discrimination and she hopes that future generations do not feel the discrimination that she had faced in her life. during her life jennixa found people that had accepted her and that she has great relationships with. “the fostering of a community of friends who can be honest with us and whom we can genuinely hear, before whom and with whom we can be open and humble” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau week three). relationships are the bases of life as well and everyone should be in a relationship with someone. that person will teach one lesson on life. just as jennixa learned from her parents, sister, and friends. pope francis said, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis week seven). jennixa de la cruz lived by this quote. she should not look in the past when there is nothing, she can do to change it, she focused on the present for a better future. jennixa lived an incredible life and may her life be an inspiration to all. a well-lived moment despite all the excitement of college, after a while, it gets quite repetitive. i have the same routine every week, and eventually, they all just mush together. each week feels like the last. my only escape from this seems to be the south shore line. for just $14 each way, i can escape my repetitive responsibilities and spend a weekend with friends. however, in my eyes, a life well lived would be one in which i don’t have to rely on the south shore line to bring me to excitement. a life well-lived would be a life in which weeks and months and years don’t mush together, but rather, are all individually cherished and enjoyed. all i would like is to lie on my death bed, completely content and happy, having enjoyed all i’ve done. as father himes said, “the most important thing you can do in your life is to come to a point where you can say that, “this is a genuine joy for me!” (three key questions by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). a well-lived life is a life composed of well-lived moments, moments where you are fully alive and cherish life. recently, i feel as if i’ve been lacking in the “well-lived moments” department. during the weeks, i’m busy and i definitely believe that i’m leading a life well-lived. however, it’s on the weekends that i’m lacking. i’ve kind of given up on notre dame weekends. i used to go out with my friends to parties and pretend to have fun, which definitely was not leading a life well-lived. so, i decided to stop. but watching a movie by myself isn’t leading a life well-lived either. however, this weekend, courtesy of the south shore line, i was once again able to experience a well-lived moment. friday night, i saw one of my favorite bands live. i love music, yet prior to this concert, i had only been to two. seeing the marías live was incredible. for the first time in weeks, i genuinely experienced a well-lived moment. it wasn’t standing in a hot, crowded room in keenan or watching a movie on my futon. it was in chicago watching one of my favorite bands play. and the well-lived moments did not stop there. saturday, after doing a little bit of work, i celebrated one of my friends from home’s birthday. i ate great food with great people, and i enjoyed every moment of it. this past weekend was truly well-lived. admittedly i was sad to leave northwestern on sunday. with each stop on the purple line and the red line, i began to dread going back to notre dame. sure, part of this dread was founded upon my three papers and a midterm this week, but mostly it was because i was returning to watching movies on my futon. i felt as if no weekend at notre dame could be as well-lived as this past weekend, at least not without the help of football or hockey. but traveling from millennium station to the south bend airport on the south shore line gives you a lot of time to think. as chicago began to fade away, i realized that there truly is no reason why every weekend cannot be that well-lived. the only thing stopping every weekend from being a well-lived moment was me. i adopted a mindset of settling. i had falsely accepted that notre dame weekends could not be truly well-lived and settled for watching movies in my room. i thought that i would never be happy trying to make notre dame something that it is not. so i accepted it and settled, and i was completely wrong. i don’t expect to find out how to make my weekends well-lived right away, but i’m sure i will. and i’m sure that doing so will help me towards a well-lived life. by adopting a mindset of not settling and striving to make every moment as well-lived as possible, i’m sure that i will lead a well-lived life. however, well-lived moments aren’t restricted to just seeing concerts and spending time with friends. there is a full spectrum of well-lived moments, and in order to lead a well-lived life, you must experience the full spectrum. one essential aspect of the spectrum is service to others. a truly well-lived life can not be lived selfishly. as pope francis said, “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people.” (https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) others, especially those who are less privileged, must be kept in mind and helped. this summer, i am planning on volunteering on a summer service-learning program (sslp), an opportunity which i hope to live well. not only will i have the opportunity to devote myself to service for an extended period of time, but i will also have the opportunity to immerse myself in a new community. i will hopefully be volunteering in either montana, kentucky, or alabama, three places i have never been to. through the sslp, i will grow as a person through both dedicated service and immersion. part of living a well-lived life is seeing how others live, and there is no better way to experience this than through immersion. however, if i do not end up doing the sslp, that does not mean my summer cannot be well-lived. perhaps i will just spend my summer in the dominican republic, relaxing on the beach and in my abuela miguey’s house. spending my summer in such a way seems far more luxurious than dedicating my summer to service, but that does not mean that it will be any less well-lived. taking time to relax is just as essential to a well-lived life as any other aspect. and given that i won’t be at a resort, i will still achieve some immersion and get to work on my spanish. either way, so long as i enjoy my summer and it is composed of well-lived moments and experiences, it is worthy of a well-lived life. because a well-lived life is not about dying as a conventionally successful person, but rather, living your life fully. not every moment of my life needs to be a well-lived moment. however, i hope for a life where i can look back and be completely satisfied with my moments. so long as i can die satisfied with my moments, it will be safe to deem my life as well-lived. microsoft word capstone integration.docx a charged life in my pursuit of a life well-lived, i will strive to fulfill my personal mission. this extends to all areas of my life and how i will impact others. in discerning my purpose, i had a conversation with sister. she provided an outside perspective on what she observed i valued, which i found perfectly congruent with my own internal feelings. this worked to reaffirm and direct my construction of defining how i want to live my life (activity: complete "week five discernment conversation activity" – moreau fye week 5). thus, my mission is to pursue a life exemplifying the glory of god. i intend on turning to him in all things, to find my answers and strength from christ. i want my life to reflect my savior, treating others the way he taught. often times i will fail. but it is how i grow from these failures that will in turn shape me into a better person. i can turn to influential figures who modeled the person of christ in shaping my own life. one such figure is father hesburgh, who reached across lives to make a lasting impact at the university of notre dame and america at large (video: "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). father hesburgh embraced humanity and exemplified a life well-lived. additionally, i can learn from “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” to remember that i can learn from my peers right here at notre dame. our campus builds upon a christian tradition to welcome all (text: “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life – moreau fye week 10). i have found this to be true, as our community is both kind and inclusive. i hope to extend the values i learn here at notre dame beyond campus and throughout the rest of my life. for me to give my all to helping others, i first must find time to rest and empower myself. this is an area i continuously struggle with, as i always want to push myself without realizing the potential costs to my health. i have found that it is difficult to balance between work and selfcare, although i have worked on improving this throughout the past semester. in the “pause for reflection” activity sheet, i took the time to reflect on the fall semester and identify areas in which i wished to improve upon (activity: complete the "pause for reflection" by mcdonald center for wellbeingmoreau fye week 1). this past semester, i took more time to truly be present with my friends, growing closer to them than ever before. i engaged more with my surroundings, finding time to take in nature and acknowledge to beauty of god’s creation. in order for me to be placed in a position to help others, i must choose a career that facilitates this. throughout my time at notre dame, i want to learn as much as i can. this will better my mind and embolden me to try new things. in this knowledge, i strive to improve upon others’ understanding. i want to be influential and instrumental in catalyzing change. i seek to pursue a life in accordance with god’s plan. in asking myself the “three key questions,” i was reassured of my chosen major in biology and the opportunities this will provide me with (text: "three key questions" by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). this activity, in addition to the resources provided by the meruelo family center for career development, aided in easing my anxiety about future jobs (text: "navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4). yet, i also found myself this semester thinking about other areas beyond my major that i could better my mind. i was encouraged by week 11’s materials encouraging growth in wisdom and gaining new outlooks on life. dr. paul blaschko provided advice on how to avoid an echo chamber and part of this process is inviting new perspectives (video: “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). this material, paired with encouragement from my professors, contributed to my decision to add a theology major. i feel that through this addition, i can enrich my understanding in both realms of science and humanities. i feel that this major will teach me how to live a life well-lived and how to form relationships, a significant component of my mission statement. i wish to find fulfilling relationships, beneficial in both directions. i want to both experience and share love. in my connections with my friends, family, and significant other, i will grow with them and give my all to their happiness. in sustaining relationships, i will strengthen my connection to the one whom i desire ultimate communion. these goals are reflected in pope francis’s teachings. he teaches that “through the darkness of today's conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (video/text: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). often, i forget how small actions can still make an impact. i remember how i feel whenever someone takes the time to just say hi to me around campus. this encourages me to do the same and reach out to others, as this is the only way to set the foundation for a fulfilling relationship. it is through these relationships that i will experience life to the fullest. i want to feel the highest of highs, gained only from what i have lost. i want a perspective that looks at obstacles as areas of growth, much like dr. kim in his five minute perspective (video: “5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week 6). i know that it is in my power as to how i can overcome and respond to difficulties. i can find hope in my foundation in the ultimate rock of jesus christ. using this outlook, i want to be able to serve others, while knowing that they will serve me. professor steve reifenberg’s idea of accompaniment as a two-fold path was particularly insightful and i strive to give and receive in this manner (text: “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). i desire to look back on my life and feel satisfied. i will live without the threat of regret and take action when it is fit. i want to help shape a society that no longer allows acts of discrimination like dean g. marcus cole experienced (text: “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole – moreau fye week 12). i want to treat everyone with the love and respect they deserve. i want to settle into eternal life knowing that people viewed me as a christian. in these things, will i find true happiness and peace. through these goals, i will live a life well-lived (activity: complete: writing a personal mission statement activity – moreau fye week 13). week 8 integration 3 jamie reintjes moreau integration 3 note: this eulogy takes place as if i were to die in the present moment. i believe a well-lived life can be expressed by someone even if they are unable to complete the “full life” that is expected. additionally, i believe it is enlightening to reflect on how we are currently living a well-lived life, not just waiting to “fulfill” a well-lived life. that being said, it must be clear that i am in a sound mental space to be reflecting on death and i am not expressing any suicidal ideations by imagining a scenario where i die today. the gift of love thank you all for coming. i am sorry that we could not be meeting under happier circumstances. i was supposed to be coming to kansas city to perform with my dear friend for who many of you are here today; unfortunately, that is not what god had planned for. as much as it pains me to acknowledge that jamie is no longer with us, i feel compelled to comfort both myself and everyone in attendance today by remembering all the beautiful experiences that jamie has left us with. jamie was kind. they were giving and welcoming to new experiences. i look back at all the times we got lunch together or just hung out. our discussions were always deep and heartfelt. jamie was there to listen and understand, i know that many of us can remember the space jamie would provide for us when we were struggling through something. my relationship with jamie was special because of how open they were. i always felt comfortable going to them and it was easy to bring up any topic that crossed my mind. jamie was a good friend and an amazing person, and i remember fondly the time i got to spend with them. it was wonderful getting to know them in just this short time and i am amazed at the life they lead for and with others. i remember the times we would be up late together, talking about life and all the various complexities it brought with it, and the love jamie expressed outwardly towards others was and still is deeply felt amongst us today, i believe. i do not know if i have ever known a friend who could be as intimate as jamie was, and they always sought out ways to display this intimacy towards others. whether it was late at night and you would receive a text from jamie telling you how much you meant to them and how much they appreciated the friendship you had with them, or the hugs jamie would give you if it had been “too long” since you had last seen each other, jamie loved you guys. it was not only just the space jamie gave you when you were with them alone, but jamie always seemed to strive for including everyone into their family. jamie was an intimate person, and wanted to be close with almost everyone they encountered. at parties or get-togethers, you would never see jamie in one spot for very long. they were always moving in the crowds, making sure to say “hi!” to everyone they knew and catching up with all their friends. speaking of get togethers, jamie was always one of the first people there to offer help when help was needed. either cleaning up a spilled drink or ordering an uber, jamie always wanted to make sure that everyone was okay before getting to relax themself. what was so special about jamie’s desire for friendship was that it’s tenderness made you feel like you were part of a family. in glee club especially, jamie was always excited not only to perform great music, but was excited that they were singing and sharing space with a diverse group of people who were deeply invested in each other’s wellbeing. jamie loved the glee club very much and loved being a part of this great community here. they made me love glee club all the more just by their enthusiasm and investment into the notre dame glee club. jamie was not just about making friends, they were about extending their family out to include everyone that they could possibly meet and i will never forget the love jamie showed me, and to everyone around them. as difficult as it can sometimes be with family members, jamie above all strove to love their family no matter what. while i was preparing for this eulogy, i wanted to take the time to introduce myself to jamie’s family and get to know them. in the brief amount of time i spent with them, it appeared to me that jamie’s parents felt like they were not always there for them. and i stand before you with the faith that jamie would reject this. even though jamie was only just beginning to understand who they were in the world, i believe that jamie would say that they loved their parents very much. that even when you guys fought, jamie wanted nothing more than to make their parents proud and i stand here to say that jamie loved you all very very much. jamie was not one to begrudge those closest to them, so in this time of mourning, i ask you all to have the faith that jamie loved you and still loves you, no matter what quarrels may have taken place between you and them (why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis – week 7 fye moreau) . recognizing the love that emanates from the hearts of each of us here today, and recognizing jamie’s love for us, i feel compelled to reminisce on death as a concluding thought. as many of you know, or will now know, jamie was quite fascinated with the nature of death, and their fascination stemmed not from a place of suffering, but from one that recognized the very hard fact that one day they would die (remember you will die by ruth graham – week 3 fye moreau). even though jamie’s body will be returned to the earth and we are forever prevented from seeing their smiling face again, jamie saw this as one last act of giving. by giving up their physical body, jamie saw new life to inevitably spring up from within them. and so, when we think of jamie, do not just remember the person they were in life, but also recognize that even in death they are continuing to show their love for us. as their body rejoins the earth, their soul returns to the source of all existence. and as the earth gives birth to new trees that give us air, one of those trees will be born out of jamie’s corpse. and not only will this new jamie provide us with breath, but so too will jamie provide for everyone, just as they wished to achieve in life. remember this love, a love that exceeds beyond death and reaches into the core of each and everyone of us here today. this is the life jamie strove for, and has achieved in death. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html microsoft word capstone integration.docx prof. oswald moreau 29 april 2022 capstone integration – relating moreau to someone i look up to in order to evaluate how i’m going to pursue a life well lived, examining and critiquing my mission statement is a great way to embark on this journey. my mission statement is as follows: to start this mission statement, the person i want to follow/replicate the most in life is my father (creating a mission statement moreau fye week 13). he is the most influential person in my life. he is the most hardworking, sensitive, kindest and impactful person i have ever met in my life. i already try my best to replicate him, but doing so is much easier said than done. i feel like this is the best role model for me because of how much i look up to him as his own child. i’m at my best when i replicate my father’s actions. when someone is causing me to feel impatient inside, i do my best to ensure that they have no idea that i am feeling that way. kindness is everything in life because you never know what someone is going through. i’ve learned this firsthand time and time again. i’m at my worst when i’m impatient with people. i care about relationships more than just about anything in life. i hate giving people the feeling that they are annoying me when they are doing nothing besides simply being themselves. this ties back to the fact that you have no idea what someone is going through. maybe a tragedy occurred that has them acting a certain way. i am truly my happiest when the people around me are happy. i feed off positivity which is why i do my best to ensure that the vibe is always positive around me. i am aware of what it takes to ensure that a room is full of positivity. i have often been told (and i agree with) that i am much wiser than my age. i feel like i know and understand concepts that a majority of people my age do not. i want to be a person who is constantly happy so that i can make other people’s days. this is exactly what my dad is like. we both care deeply about other people and want the best for everyone. in a world full of hate, ensuring other people’s happiness is critical to both my father and i. my deepest positive emotions come when i see happiness on the faces of those who i love. my greatest gifts are my sympathy and love for people/earth in general. when all is said and done, the most important things in life are those we love and the nature that surrounds us. i love helping those that are less fortunate than me because too many people take their blessed lives for granted. as long as i roam earth, i know that i will never be one of those people. i love to volunteer, donate when i can, and spend time with the less fortunate. my father is the exact same way. while i assert these qualities strongly at most times, i know that i can be better at doing so. when i demonstrate these qualities 24/7 and feel that i'm doing that inside my soul, then i will know that i have completed my personal mission. until then, i understand that i have work to do. drawing comparisons to how my father guides his life is a fantastic way to describe how it is that i want to orient my life. there are so many examples from our weekly modules that further emphasize my points. to begin, after admiral richard e. byrd spent nearly five months alone in a shack in the antarctic, in temperatures that sank to 70 degrees below zero, he emerged convinced that “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote is extremely early in the article but it completely stood out to me when thinking about the life that i’m living. i think it also applies to the life that everyone else is living. admiral byrd put himself in one of the most miserable and dangerous situations possible. doing this allowed him to reflect on and evaluate what he really needs in life versus what he doesn’t need. i haven’t ever gone through a drastic experiment like this, but my dad grew up in a third world country and understands what it feels like to financially struggle. the fact that he has now accomplished so much is really remarkable, and he doesn’t ever forget the things that he really needs in life. he taught me this lesson and this is just one of the many things that he has guided me through in life. one thing that i highlight in my mission statement is how my father always wants to help people. he’s a big donor to homeless people and this reminds me of someone i highlighted from week 2. matt conaghan. “matt conaghan ‘15 helping charities grow with the power of spare change” (“domer dozen” university of notre dame moreau fye week two). donating to someone or a group of people doesn’t always mean you are donating in the form of money. donating could simply be you investing your time into a certain cause for the better. matt conaghan was just one example of what it takes to be selected as a part of the domer dozen. conaghan started change donations which is an international fundraising platform that helps nonprofits and schools grow with the power of spare change. the platform allows users to round up their purchases to the nearest dollar and donate the difference to their favorite causes. starting something so beneficial makes it no surprise that conaghan was selected as a part of the domer dozen. i see a lot of similarities between matt’s style and my dad’s. these are two people that i strive to be like and i will pursue their actions over the next 3 years. i think there is a distinct difference between joy and happiness. “what’s the difference between joy and happiness? happiness changed from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” (“three key questions” michael himes moreau fye week three). this quote explains that joy is much deeper than happiness. i believe my dad illustrates joy because of who he is as a human. the actions that he persists. seeing this, i realize what i need to do in order to be full of joy. happiness will come and go, but joy lasts for much longer. just by being a good person i think i can achieve pure joy. in order to live a life well lived, planning is absolutely involved. my dad is a fantastic planner, and i think this not only contributes to a well lived life, but also makes him happier in general. i think in these next three years i will need to work on my planning for sure. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process.” (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i love this quote regarding planning your career, and i believe that this quote is very applicable to many other situations. planning something like a career is not something that you can half-fast or put very little effort into. it is something that one works on for months and months at a time. there are so many little things that go into planning a career that require so much time in itself. because of this, i believe that planning has a lot to do with a life well-lived. career planning is just one example of how planning is required for one’s new journey of any type in life. week 5 was big for me because this week emphasized communication. i was able to talk to my mom, and we’ve had communication issues throughout our life, so being able to connect with her was something that i will forever cherish. week 5’s activity was something much better than a qqc in my opinion. maybe i’m just saying that because it was something different. i loved being able to connect with my mom over these questions, so i think that has a big influence on me liking this activity better. the conservation with my mom was extremely deep and reflective. when i asked her what i value and desire the most in life, she responded with: the people who you are closest to. i agreed with this statement because i really do value the people closest to me. i look to have their backs and always make sure that they are doing alright. for the in my zone question my mom said that she has seen me the most locked in when i’ve been grinding in high school. i would spend the whole day doing homework sometimes which demonstrated my commitment and determination. my goal was to always get into the best university possible. hearing my mom’s responses to the questions really made me become selfaware of myself even more. i remember all the events that we talked about, it was just very refreshing to think and reflect on them. for something that was difficult to say but important for me to hear was that i really should talk to my sister more. i think it was hard to say because my mom knows i really value my relationship with my sister so she didn’t want to hurt my feelings. i was really glad she told me because it is definitely something i want to work on now that i’m conscious about it. i didn’t realize that i wasn’t talking to her enough until my mother told me. i think week 6 also taught me a great deal about how to think in the future. mental health is massive and breaking down the simpler concepts are essential in dissecting the roots of our happiness and sadness. for example, thinking about why we are sad is advice that we often receive. we shouldn’t think about why we’re sad, but rather should consider what could make us feel better. “another reason that asking why is not always so beneficial is the negative impact it can have on our overall mental health. in one study, after british university students failed what they were told was an intelligence test, they were asked to write about why they felt the way they did. compared to a control group, they were more depressed immediately afterward, and these negative effects persisted 12 hours later. asking why appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems and place blame instead of moving forward in a healthy and productive way.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” tasha eurich moreau fye week six). it doesn’t surprise me at all that focusing on the why would lead to additional depression in the situation. imagine you are sad about something. instead of just moving forward, you decide to think about why it is that you are sad. of course, this will make you more sad than anything else. figuring out the root of the problem makes you think about the saddening thing more which in turn makes you depressed. that’s the link between that and the overall mental health seeing a decrease. i think that’s why it is best to try and forget why you are sad and instead just do your best to move forward. this is advice that i can use/give for the rest of my life. if there’s one thing that my dad taught me, it is that “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis moreau fye week 7). based on how my dad touches the lives of others, and based on how connected he is, these words couldn’t be more accurate. i have always taken these words to heart, and i will forever cherish them. in week 8 i composed my own eulogy regarding my definition of a life well lived. in this eulogy i did the most self-reflection that i think i’ve ever done in my life. i went back to the early stages of my life, and connected it full circle to where i am now. before this eulogy i don’t think i was a very reflective person whatsoever. i think in order to be successful and happy in life, self-reflection is key. my dad tells me about how he likes to sit and reflect a lot on his own and the treasures that come with doing so. "accompaniment is an elastic term. it has a basic, everyday meaning,” farmer wrote in an article on accompaniment published in foreign affairs. “to accompany someone is to go somewhere 2 with him or her, to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an end.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this quote is extremely insightful because it provides a firm definition of what it means to accompany someone. essentially, truly accompanying someone means that you are with them through the entire journey. you’re an outlet of loyalty to someone and go through thick and thin with them. my father taught me to always accompany people especially when they are struggling. i’ve always been the kid to hang out with and make them feel better. i think this trait of accompaniment is something that will help me a lot in life. one thing about my dad is that he doesn’t care at all about what people think about him. this allows him to be the purest form of himself. this is something that i’ve struggled with, and something that i continue to learn. i think continuing to learn to not care what people think about you will serve very well in the future. “i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either.” (“growing up gay and catholic” jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). this example is with accepting homosexuality, but this quote really applies to so many situations. people come up with reasons in their head as to why they won’t be loved by certain people just because they are being themselves. this is extremely saddening because society is so ruthless that people are scared to be themselves. in no world should people not want to be themselves because they are scared of what others will think of them and how they will be judged. the truth is god loves everyone who follows good morals and lives their life to the fullest while blooming. being gay has absolutely nothing to do with the morals of a human being no matter what anyone else says. it’s really just super sad. i think one thing my dad and i could both work on is growing in wisdom. this was a concept highlighted in week 10. i think we are both pretty stubborn which is why we like hanging out around people that share the same views as us. we are both conflict free people which is why it makes sense. week 10 taught me that you need an opposition in order to grow in wisdom. “in surrounding ourselves with people that agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). this statement couldn’t be further from the truth. it sure seems a lot more fun when you surround yourself with people who agree with you all the time. this is because if everyone agrees with each other, then there is no debate or arguments amongst those who you are with. this usually ensures a smoother gathering with less conflict. this makes it especially difficult to hear a counterargument to whatever point you are trying to make. this is because you’re so used to being around people who never disagree with you that you don’t like hearing when someone has something else to say. week 12 emphasized how we can grow in our courage to act. what will it take? this is another area that i think my dad could polish. i’m very courageous in sticking up for what i believe in. i think this will help me a lot in the future as well. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i love this quote because the human rights issues in the united states hadn’t been talked about enough until 2020. people outside of the united states just assume that human rights in this country aren’t under threat because we run a smooth democracy. people don’t really understand what black people in the united states have to deal with. we know human rights are in danger in countries such as china, korea, russia and other countries. the united states deals with our own issues as well, and people need to start recognizing this. i started this capstone integration with my personal mission statement in order to set the foundation for the rest of the topics that i was going to dissect. i truly believe that following my father’s footsteps is the most effective way for me to live the life that i want to live. he truly cherishes every important value, and having him as my role model is something so special that words can’t even explain. if i can live with half the morals that he lives with, i know my future will be phenomenal. he truly is such a special character in my life. i make sure to let him know that by talking to him every day and explaining my gratitude and appreciation for his continuous presence in my life. in terms of how i can continue to grow in my time here as a student at nd is as simple as follows: i have the answers on this document. every week i spent on moreau was another hour (or two) that i grew exponentially as a person. this assignment reminds me a lot of a final portfolio where you put everything in one document from the whole semester. i’m going to save this sheet and use it every year that i’m here. everything i need to read about continuing to grow as a person is right in front of my eyes. i just need to embrace it and continue to do the work myself. moreau integration 3 mahoney 1 alison thigpen moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 a life of faith: the ultimate key to fulfillment this past week, i was spending time with some of my closest friends as we flipped through a book of 5000 questions to get to know others on a deeper level. as we became gradually more immersed in the questions, the small dorm room became a space of great vulnerability and courage as we all shared the inner workings of our hearts with one another. as we discussed questions ranging from favorite breakfast foods, to virtues we possess, to life goals, i spent significant time considering how i live my life, how i am perceived by others, and how i will embark on a life well-lived. i want to be remembered as someone that is unafraid to stand up for those closest to them, and i strive to create a sense of community and belonging with all those around me. pope francis opens his powerful speech by stating that “life is not merely time passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). this truth has been extremely prominent in my time at notre dame, as i have realized that the close relationships i have formed with those around me enable my life to take on a greater significance and purpose. i find myself surrounded by others in an incredible community of faith in dorm masses at notre dame, and i have made it my mission to bring a new friend to dorm mass each week. i hope to be remembered as someone that establishes a strong sense of community and welcomes others into this sense of belonging, as the people i surround myself with help to define my beliefs, values, and lifestyle. as i establish strong bonds https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript mahoney 2 with others, i also want to be remembered as someone that is very reflective and has a great sense of self-awareness. ultimately, this sense of self-awareness will enable me to connect with myself and god in moments of quiet and peace. it is true that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in today’s age of technology, close connections to oneself and to others are often lost, but i strive to sustain these relationships by incorporating mindfulness and journaling gratitude in daily life. after all, life is very short and must be lived to the fullest through the close bonds we make with others. although thinking about death and the future can be frightening, sister alethia reminds us that “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun that wants you to remember you will die” by sister aletheia moreau fye week 3). to live a life-well lived, i must have the courage to acknowledge both the light and darkness of life, as happiness comes from hope and recognizing god’s hand in all parts of life. death is inevitable, and through acknowledging this unstoppable fate, i can begin to find light in my life well-lived. the sign of a life well-lived is that one is able to adapt to the hardships of life and recognize the truth that things happen for a reason, as positive reactions to challenges will enable growth in new directions. this is especially true in careers and discernment of future plans, as conversations with professors and family members have revealed that life is full of unexpected twists. notre dame’s center for career development reminds students that “it is imperative to take time after an experience or conversation to think intentionally about how it impacted you” since “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey” by the center for career development moreau fye week https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ mahoney 3 4). at notre dame, i have encountered many individuals with unique paths, and our moreau class discussions of our professor’s career path and my classmates’ changes to intended majors continually remind me that no path is linear. furthermore, conversations with my upperclassmen mentors in army rotc have been particularly insightful, as i have realized that my passion for giving back to others aligns with my goal of medical service in the military. my rotc classmates and i created various presentations of the unique military branches as our final project for class, and i was able to keep an open mind to career options by recognizing that a life-well lived stems from the ability to succeed and adapt to various paths in life. although a life well-lived can be characterized by adaptability to unexpected changes on new paths, i experience barriers to this, as i often dwell on past decisions and imagine alternative future outcomes. when i had my discernment reflection with my dad, he told me something that was difficult to say but important to hear: you will always have small regrets as you go through your career path, but you must always continue on your path and not dwell on these regrets, as things always happen for a reason (discernment reflection moreau fye week 5). a life well-lived can be characterized by the ability to adapt to challenges and new twists in life, and i strive to embody this ability in order to lead a life of hope and joy regardless of the path that god leads me on. as i navigate life, i hope that my actions are observable and characteristic of a life well-lived. one key sign of a life well-lived is the ability to live in the moment and enjoy the beauty of life at all times. dr. kim encourages us “to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by dr. kim, grotto moreau fye week 6). in moments filled with so much pain and loss, it is easy for the darkness clouding one’s mind to push out the presence of god. i experienced immense pain and sadness at the start of the semester as my godmother https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 mahoney 4 passed away, and these emotions enabled me to recognize that suffering is an inevitable part of life. a life well-lived is one guided by god, and i strive to lead by example by finding gratitude when responding with god to suffering. when i utilize my faith to find joy within great suffering, i can begin to appreciate all that i can do, rather than what i do not have. however, a life well-lived does not indicate that life will be free of hardships, sufferings, or failures. in the film hesburgh, audiences are reminded that “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week 2). a life well-lived demonstrates vulnerability to recognize one’s failures, as recognition of failure is truly the only way to grow. after the first semester concluded, i utilized winter break for self-reflection of how i had fallen short in my relationships with friends, my studies, or my involvement in my faith. after recognizing these shortcomings, i was able to grow on my path to a life well-lived as i worked to spend more time while drawing good friends and my faith closer to my heart. as i allocate more time for those that i love and for my faith, i find that i am able to discover new moments of joy and successes that illuminate a life well-lived. through enriching encounters with my faith, i have discovered close community connections with those around me at notre dame. as i grow in a community of love for one another and for god, i am inspired to consider how i want to be remembered, how i define a well-lived life, and the observable signs of a life well-lived. there are numerous ways to live life, but a life well-lived is one that is guided by faith. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 describe one particular research and/or intellectual interest that you plan to pursue beyond the classroom. why does that interest you? what steps have you taken to pursue that interest at notre dame? beyond the classroom, i aim to research and design machinery that increases efficiency in scientific processes via mechanical and biomechanical engineering. i believe that i can use my research and design to serve through problem solving and fostering scientific progress. my passion for problem solving and design led me to this interest. i discovered this method of applying my interests thanks to my internship last summer. i worked at a small, local laboratory on several machines and parts aimed at increasing accessibility and efficiency of scientific processes. my biggest project, pipette guide, assists labs with manual pipetting. while similar products exist, our team aimed to optimize this product by making it cheaper to manufacture without diminishing its performance. this would allow the small device to be sold at a much lower price, increasing accessibility for labs with smaller budgets. we also created several smaller products that increased the efficiency of other scientific processes, such as freeze drying. i want to optimize scientific processes through research, design, and problem solving so that society can advance scientific progress at a greater rate. this will provide more resources for smaller labs and reduce procedure times so that we can quickly research, create medicines, and further global progress. this is how i can best use my skills and passions to serve. at notre dame, i am pursuing these interests by participating in the notre dame rocketry team. during my time on the team, i worked on the apogee control system. the purpose of this system is to aid our rocket in reaching a particular peak height and to monitor that height so we can adjust our system accordingly. the acs provides efficient control of the height of our rocket. i also researched motors to add to this system that would provide slight adjustments and enough power to our course adjustments. this further optimizes the rocket by making it easier for the acs to control the peak height. thanks to my experience in design and research from ndrt, i am one step closer to my goal of serving others by optimizing scientific procedures. what are your goals for post-graduation and how do you think participation in the sorin scholars can help you achieve those goals? what grants and/or fellowships do you intend to pursue while at notre dame to help accomplish these goals? after graduation, i intend to pursue a career in mechanical engineering. i aspire to gain experience with research, design, and problem solving in the work force. my hope is that this job can further my education by not only providing me this experience but also by leading to a graduate degree. i hope to achieve a master’s degree in mechanical or biomechanical engineering or an mba. i aim to work for a company that will help me pursue this graduate degree. participating in the sorin scholars program can help me achieve this in a multitude of ways. first, it will provide structure and instruction as i apply for research, career, and fellowships. because i am committed to a research career, undergraduate research experience is vital for pursuing careers and higher education. this program will introduce me to such opportunities and support and guide me through the application and interview processes. outside of imparting its knowledge of research, careers, and fellowships, sorin scholars can also connect me with alumni. they will share knowledge and advice and help me build my network, which will benefit my job search. second, the sorin scholars program can also help me participate in post-graduate outreach. i wish to use my career knowledge to support girls in stem. this cause is of great importance to me, and the sorin scholars can guide me through finding a career or organization through which i could do this. this way, i can provide opportunities for girls to learn about and interact with my field of research, further fulfilling my aspiration to serve through research and design. thirdly, this program can aid in finding and applying for fellowships and grants so that i may continue to engage in research and engineering. i intend to pursue programs like the goldwater scholarship program. i plan to contribute to research in the fields of mechanical and biomechanical engineering, and this program would support my educational pursuit towards a mechanical research career, allowing me to accomplish such contributions. integration 3 the last chapter since maria loved books throughout her life, i think it is only fitting that these last remarks should complete her story as a fairytale would draw to its close, with every piece accounted for and arranged in a larger message of encouraging goodness in its listeners. for that is what her life was, an encouragement to all of us. an encouragement to hope, to love, to believe, and most importantly, to live intentionally and exactly as we ought. what other purpose do we have in life except to play the part of a hero well, and to inspire others to accomplish their own heroic destinies along the way? blaise pascal once said that “all the unhappiness of men…arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (why we need to slow down our lives | (ted.com) by pico iyer - moreau fye week 1). i often wondered where maria found time for everything and everyone she did, but when i realized the priority she gave to prayer in her life, it’s no wonder that the silence she gave to god enabled her to bring that quiet, stable strength to all other aspects of her life. if there is anything i will remember about maria, it was the fact that her presence was just as, or often even more, powerful than anything she said explicitly. i remember the moment i received news that my mother had passed, and she came over to my house and just sat with me in the living room and listened and nodded as i cried and talked about what i was going through. so many of us have similar experiences, for maria was always putting her family and friends first, and this was only possible because of her hidden life of faith. one of the comments about a domer dozen honoree, katarina goitz, encapsulates her influence on all of us gathered together to honor her life today. it was said about her that “her grace was like a burning flame. she passed it along to everyone she met, and her kindness and gentleness inspired those she touched to spread it further.” (2021 domer dozen (nd.edu), katarina goitz ’16 ’18 – moreau fye week 2). despite all of this, many don’t know about the struggles she encountered, especially in her early life. the trials her family went through, especially as she went through her teenage years, stayed with her for the rest of her life. more than anything, she wanted to heal the people she loved so much, and i believe most of her difficulties stemmed from places where she felt unable to help the suffering. however, instead of giving into despair, she used this experience to fuel the purpose of her life and work, and allowed it to make her open to any unexpected circumstances god sent her way. one idea that really inspired her was that “there is no point where you can say, “the issue of my calling is settled.” vocations lead to vocations! it may raise other questions, and there’s no point where you can say that, “i do not have any more questions.” the only time your vocation is settled is when you are settled (six feet under that is!).” ("three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes): sp22-fys-10102-20 moreau first year experience (nd.edu) -moreau fye week 3). for maria, it didn’t make sense to see the whole road at the same time. she firmly believed that god wanted her to live day to day without worrying about the future, and she strove to live that out in every aspect of her journey. indeed, her life took many twists and turns, but she always seemed content to give up her plans and change course in order to follow wherever he led. although she loved planning ahead and organizing anything that could be rearranged or improved upon, she rejected the https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 competitive, worldly atmosphere of her career (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course | undergraduate career services | university of notre dame – moreau fye week 4) and chose to center her life around giving back to others in service and love. a picture of maria’s life would be incomplete without all the people who journeyed with her along the way. she always sought others advice when making decisions, anything from what she should serve for dinner to whether she should open another hospital to expand her ministry. she appreciated that every person brought a unique perspective and came into her life for a reason, and so valued and sought out others opinions at every opportunity (moreau fye_week five_discernment conversation activity_sp22 google docs – moreau fye week 5). this practice also assisted her in her constant desire for self-improvement. she strove to orient her life to giving to others, and she would often reflect on that we must “focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet” (why does god allow suffering? grotto network -moreau fye week 6). she didn’t want to waste any of the time she was given, so she could leave this life having done her part and fulfilled her purpose, and she tried to strengthen her good qualities and improve her bad ones. i truly believe that maria achieved this goal in her life, so much so that she is a great inspiration for all of us. to use the words of fr. greg boyle, by the end of her life, maria was no longer saddled by the burden of…persistent judgements…ceaseless withholding…constant exclusion”, she found herself “in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love…into god’s own “jurisdiction.”” (_tattoos on the heart_ chapter 8_ jurisdiction (1).pdf by fr. greg boyle, sj -moreau fye week 7). we thank god for the gift of maria today and for a life that became a source of many blessings for all of us. may we never forget the impact of a life well-lived on the stories of our own lives, as maria’s life was for each of us. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 file:///c:/users/marie/downloads/_tattoos%20on%20the%20heart_%20-%20chapter%208_%20jurisdiction%20(1).pdf the animation of my mission statement it is my mission to thrive, live humbly and happily, help, serve, protect, and grow in wisdom and compassion. as a child of god i am called to imitate christ in all of my actions, no matter how small, and to stand up for any injustice i see. it is my duty as a human being to help protect and care for my fellow human beings, as well as this planet that we were given. i strive to be dedicated to living a joyful life, and doing things that make me happy and that also make a difference, not just what makes me money. charity, generosity, and loyalty are virtues that i strive for on a daily basis. every day must be devoted to learning and wisdom, as it is through both that i grow and thrive and become the person i was meant to be. education of not only myself but also my fellow human beings must also be a priority. it is through teaching others that we are able to fully learn and know ourselves. unconditional love and compassion are my top goals, and are something i try to practice in all moments of my life, regardless of how difficult and challenging it might be. i believe that forgiveness and open-mindedness are the only ways to embrace humanity fully and to create a better world. finally, i realize that we are all on different and separate journeys, heading towards the same goal, and it is my duty as a christian to walk with my fellow brothers and sisters through their suffering and hardships. i plan to live my life following this mission statement for the rest of my life, but especially throughout these next three years at the university of notre dame. living out a mission statement, especially this one, is not easy. there will be many times where this mission statement is extremely difficult. some virtues are extremely hard to practice in general, but especially for me. when i come into contact with people who have done some very bad things and feel little to no remorse for their actions, i struggle, and will struggle, with demonstrating compassion, forgiveness, and kindness towards that individual. i recognize how hard it is for me to forgive and to show kindness towards people because i am someone who is a perfectionist and struggles with wrongdoing. i am a person who believes wholeheartedly in justice and making sure that everyone is treated fairly and gets what they deserve. and it is hard for me to demonstrate compassion, forgiveness, and kindness to someone who has done terrible things and doesn’t see that they were bad or feel guilty for them, because it doesn’t feel like they’ve earned those virtues from me. however, i will try to overcome this by reminding myself that virtues are a gift. they are given freely, without any strings attached, regardless of what the receiver deserves or earns. as father hesburgh said, “we may have ha[ve] our disagreements but at the end of the day we [are] all fishermen." (video: "hesburgh", by jerry barca and christine o'malley, moreau fye week two). this mission statement will also be hard to live out for me because i am a person who, for the majority of her life, has been motivated primarily by the greater good. i believed, and still believe for the most part, that the happiness of one should not outweigh the happiness of the many. the wants, needs, and desires of the one should not be put before the wants, needs, and desires of the many. so, i often put others before myself to an extreme point. i struggled with the realization that balance is necessary, that i should strive for my own happiness, not just striving for the happiness of others or to make a difference. sometimes it is ok to be selfish, and to not be fully regulated by doing what is right or good for the majority. i try to think about the question “what are your obsessions?” ("three key questions", by fr. michael himes, moreau week 3). i think that by reminding myself, daily, that by striving towards my own happiness, i am able to do a better job at helping the many, i will be able to have an easier time at sticking to my mission statement. despite my mission statement being somewhat difficult to achieve, i think that there are many ways in which i am able to live it out on a daily basis. i plan to keep moving forward, and not get stuck in the past. [blank] said that “asking ‘why?’... cause[d] the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”, by tasha eurich, moreau fye week 6). by moving forward, i am able to thrive. by going to mass on a weekly basis and participating in communion, i am able to continue and practice my faith as a child of god should. my mission statement calls for me to stand up to injustice. i can do that by being kind to others, in all that i do. i try to always keep in mind and live by the quote, ​​“i must do something.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.”, by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school, moreau fye week 12). i can also say something to someone if they make an unkind/unjust comment, whether it simply be a “hey, that wasn’t super nice”. i can also stand up to injustice by keeping myself informed about what is going on in the world around me, and informing others from reliable sources. i can also stand up for injustice by supporting other people and other groups who fight injustice, whether that be by donating money, voting, or attending events. i do this at church when i donate money to help outside causes, or when i provide a donation to the international justice mission. when i vote i select candidates that i believe are working the hardest to combat justice. i attend events at notre dame, as well as events outside of notre dame, that revolve around peace and what we can do, as well as what others are doing, to promote peace and combat injustice. as a follower of my mission statement, i try to protect and care for my fellow human beings. i remember that “we are all children of god” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”, by his holiness pope francis, moreau fye week 7). i do this by participating in service and volunteer work. i help prepare meals to deliver to those in need, and i donate clothes to those less fortunate. i try to protect others by standing up for people who cannot stand up for themselves. i also chose the career and majors i am in to try and protect others. i want to be an international human rights lawyer so that way i can protect women, children, and other people who cannot protect themselves and to get them the justice they deserve. while i am not there yet, i still strive for that goal by majoring in global affairs with a concentration in civil and human rights so that i can one day more directly protect others. i try to care for my planet by not eating meat, both for humanitarian reasons and environmental reasons. i recycle and reuse as much as i possibly can, and i limit the amount of electricity i use by not turning on my lights during the day until it gets dark. i also live out my mission statement by putting as much hard work and focus as i possibly can into my education. i take classes that i am interested in and that i think are important and useful, and i do my best to learn as much as i possibly can through them. through that i am able to grow and thrive. i also tutor others who need help in regards to their education, so i am able to live out my belief that the teaching of others is a priority because it helps the world and helps us know more about ourselves and the world. i practice all of the virtues that are a part of my mission statement on a daily basis just by communicating with others and demonstrating those virtues in the way i converse and conduct myself around others. finally, i support others who are suffering or experiencing hardships by being an active listener, and demonstrating empathy towards their pain. i will do, like steve reifenberg said, “what need[s] to be done.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together”, by professor steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). i think my mission statement will be strengthened as well as challenged while i am here at notre dame. there are many people here from all over the world, from many different walks of life who are going to have different mission statements than me and question why i have the mission statement that i do. but being challenged by others also helps me strengthen my mission statement, as i am able to look at other perspectives and counter argue or improve my mission statement through those outside perspectives. these outside perspectives also help me avoid bubbles, which can “become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber”, by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). i also think my mission statement will be strengthened here at notre dame because there will be many opportunities to practice my mission statement. there are clubs, organizations, and activities on campus that will allow me to fulfill my mission statement, whether that be through service, volunteering, or simply community. overall, i believe that notre dame will be extremely beneficial to me and my mission statement. in conclusion, i plan to live out my mission statement, and to allow it to guide my life. while this may be difficult, i believe that it will be fulfilling, and i am already making progress and living out my mission statement in a number of ways. finally, being here at notre dame will help to strengthen my mission statement and allow for me to improve and grow in living out my mission statement. moreau integration 1: eulogy victoria gordon-brown death of a desert daffodil ‘memento mori.’1 wise words once said by sister alethia, a nun at the daughters of st paul convent, but embodied by victoria gordon-brown. victoria was very aware of her mortality so tried to take advantage of every moment of life that she had. she filled her days with family, friends, and fun, seeking out adventure and, in doing so, making meaningful connections along the way. she was known for being the life of the party but always willing to pause the fun if one of her friends was in need. these moments of caring for those she cared deeply about were what victoria found to be the most important. whilst she was open, caring, and accepting of others, she was also a staunch defender of what she believed in. inspired by figures such as tia b. paulette, founding president of the notre dame law school’s exoneration project,2 she never shied away from an opportunity to fight for others’ rights, for example, through her dedication to promoting conversations about sexual health and sexual health rights, like bodily autonomy. in this way, she worked to become someone others could and would look to for inspiration. in doing so, she hoped to build a more accommodating world that future generations could continue to nurture and cultivate. now we all know victoria and what she does. everything. she literally would not sit still. a good day for her was filled with all the activities she could possibly fit in. however, even though she was very active, she also enjoyed down time to rest and recover. kevin kelly was one of her inspirations for doing this. kelly’s own decision to ‘continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am,’3 inspired victoria to try to do the same. with these words in mind, she took time for herself without technology to meditate, colour, journal and do yoga to ensure she found a balance between looking after herself and others – of course, in the victoria way, her rest involved doing things still. i do not even think she knew what netflix was! in the ‘down time’ that she gave herself, she tried to reflect in a constructive way so that it would help her improve and build a positive mindset – classic victoria. this is why she asked herself ‘what’ questions instead of ‘why’ questions.4 in questioning what she was feeling and what it was that made her feel this way, she was able to consider what she valued in life, like her loved ones, time outdoors, learning and quizzes. now victoria loved quizzes. she leapt at chances to take quizzes, whether they be general knowledge, personality, or career oriented. when given moreau quizzes, like ‘the 7 clues,’5 she keenly engaged her critical thinking skills, intrigued by what answers each question might lead her to. through her participation in numerous such quizzes, she was able to grasp what her 1 (moreau fye week 3: the nyt: meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die) 2 (moreau fye week 2: the notre dame alumni association’s “domer dozen.”) 3 (moreau fye week 1: why we need to slow down our lives; pico iyer) 4 (moreau fye week 6: the right way to be introspective; tasha eurich, ted conferences) 5 (moreau fye week 4: the 7 clues: an interactive assessment activity; meruelo family center for career development) moreau integration 1: eulogy victoria gordon-brown career goals were and how she could fulfil these. and fulfil these she did. her career ambitions were matched only by her dedication to her work, putting the same energy into each project as she did when helping her friends. victoria’s thorough enjoyment of working hard was clear to those who loved her. her brother remembers conversations6 in which he specifically told her that, no matter what field she wanted to go into, she had to work with people because that was where she thrived. whilst she was confident and sociable by nature, she always remembered his holiness pope francis’ words that ‘life is about interactions.’7 these words inspired her to be inclusive and value all the interactions she had and the diverse people she had them with. she loved learning about other cultures and people’s lives, and, if needed, help support them. her brother also noted this giving nature and, as i said, her eagerness to get involved in any and everything she could. when talking to him, he said that he wished that she had had more time as there was still much she wanted to do, but regardless of this, when she passed, she felt like she had lived her life well. victoria will be remembered for the joy she brought to those around her, whether that be from smiling at a stranger, hugging a friend who needed it, or sharing in others’ successes. her time on this earth was short-lived but well-lived. she accomplished a lot in both her career and her personal life and her legacy will live on. her strong moral compass and compassion for those around her will be at the core of all of our memories of her. she was not always perfect, in fact, sometimes she was far from it, but she always tried her best to meet the high standards that she would set for herself. a bright light in the dark, knowing victoria was like finding a daffodil in a dessert: unexpected and not necessarily what you asked for, but what you did not know you needed. although she was taken from us in a most unexpected way, in some ways, it is what you would expect. rest in peace victoria, may your life’s joy and fulfilment continue to permeate the lives of those with whom you connected and, in doing so, may your memory live on. you will be missed by us all. 6 (moreau fye week 5: week 5 discernment conversation activity; conversation with my brother) 7 (moreau fye week 7: why the only future worth building includes everyone; his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) capstone integration what is a life well lived? life is messy. i have tried to plan it out. planning sometimes works to a degree, but the steps of life “don’t take place in a nice, neat order.  it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow.” (navigating your career journey center for career development moreau fye week 4) i think that this is a good way to think about planning life. because nothing is going to go exactly as you intend. in a word, nothing is constant. so we must find the things that are constant, and strive towards those. my mission statement is essentially that— the things which i believe are constant and unchanging. i said in it, “i believe that god is good. more importantly i believe that he loves me, so much that he suffered the worst pains imaginable for me.” (mission statement moreau week 7) his love is unconditional, meaning that no matter the circumstances, he will still love. that is what christians are called to do as well. because life is full of the unexpected, and oftentimes the thing which we do not expect is suffering. but the amazing thing that christ did was to love the people who caused his suffering. that is a hard thing. but such is unconditional love, which is my mission. who, then should we love? well, for one, god. but what does that mean in practical application? “i was hungry and you fed me, i was naked and you clothed me” is what christ said. so when we love those people around us, we love god. this is akin to what fr. hesburgh said, “if you want to do something good, i think there’s a lot of room right here to do something good.” (hesburgh jerry barca, christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) look around to your immediate neighbor. not to someone you might help on that mission trip this summer, but to the kid who is sitting alone in the dining hall. or your class mate who needs help on the homework. because if we can’t love the people next to us, how do we expect to help those far away? and if we do this, the positive effects are greater than the sum of the parts, as fr. greg boyle records, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together they had a potful of plenty.” (tattoos on the heart, chapter 8: jurisdiction fr. greg boyle s.j. moreau fye week 7) this, i have found, is easier said than done. loving and connecting with people requires something that is extremely hard to give, and that is yourself. relationships are impossible if you are simply thinking about yourself. you must instead forget yourself by simply enjoying the presence of others, paying genuine attention to them when they talk, caring about how they feel, and simply knowing them. and when i have done this, i have found myself enjoying myself more than any other time. this is because forgetting yourself “strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you to a place defined by something larger.” (why we need to slow down our lives pico iyer moreau fye week 1) this type of relationship, in the context of helping, is called accompaniment. “some people usefully focus more on what it is not: accompaniment does not involve being patronized, or having one’s autonomy taken away or one’s sense of dignity diminished. it doesn’t mean another person takes over your life.” (teaching accompaniment, steve reifenberg) the point is that in any relationship, even when the other is in dire need of help, you must remain a servant to those around you, recognizing that you are worth more than no one. it is important to have a certain sense of dignity, however. all people, to some degree, deserve this. and it eventually stems from god and his love for us. jacob walsh had this experience regarding this topic. he says, ““i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself,” he told me. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either.”” (growing up gay and catholic jacob walsh) and in terms of leadership, you must have this dignity, which is often seen as a a sort of authenticity, in order for 1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ people to listen, as parker palmer writes, “leadership for community requires authority, a form of power that is freely granted to the leader by his or her followers. authority is granted to people who are perceived as authentic, as authoring their own words and actions rather than proceeding according to some organizational script.” (thirteen ways of looking at community parker palmer) this dignity is also what allows yourself to recognize the things that you are good at. my mom told me in an interview that “you are good at designing things, and it is your passion.” (conversation with lauren whatley, february 3, 2022 moreau fye week 5) knowing these talents is crucial to using them to help others. as an aside, it is important to allow everyone this dignity, because sometimes it is unjustly taken away. dean marcus cole wrote about an experience wherein a police officer took away that dignity. he says, “still, i have often thought about what lasting scars may have cut into their psyche by watching what that officer did to me that night. i often wonder what my sons think of me, as a man, and as their protector, knowing that i could not fight back.” (i am george floyd, except, i can breathe. and i can do something. d. marcus cole) it is a heartbreaking thing to see something so violently stolen. but, as i said in my mission statement, i am ultimately a servant, so my suffering must be checked, and i must remain humble. one reason for this is that i have very little to be prideful about in the first place. not very long from now, i will be dead, a thought called momento mori. a nun said that this idea, “allowed [her], not exactly to cope, but to surrender everything to god.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ruth graham moreau fye week 3) and that is what we must do if we are to live a life well lived, surrender. we must surrender to the fact that suffering is a fact of life, and that our m mission is not to escape it. aria swarr said, “the purpose of my life is not simply to overcome suffering suffering is a part of our lives the purpose of our life is how to respond to suffering.” (5 minutes aria swarr moreau fye week 6) and so, as i said in my a letter to my former self, “i can only give you this advise; take time to have fun, hold fast to your friends, trust your god. go boldly into whatever suffering you encounter knowing that it is those times that truly make a life well lived.” (a letter from your future self moreau week 8) 2 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 moreau integration 3 metacognition and mindfulness o’connor 1 cashel o’connor father kevin integration 3 march 2022 the man in the arena in reading the prompt sheet, i noticed the phrase “that what we want–insight or understanding–not certainty.” this reminded me of my pls seminar, specifically “the histories” by herodotus. the great persian king xerxes, on his way to invade the greek city-states, says to his uncle, “certainty, surely, is beyond human grasp” (herodotus 435). in fact, from what i have read in class the ancient greeks seem to believe that the only certainty in life is death. a rather fatalistic outlook on life; however, it really helped me put into perspective my own life. the only thing i can truly be certain of is death, so why stress myself out trying to be certain about anything? instead, i resolve to practice what i now know is called mindfulness. through this, i hope to gain insight, not certainty. to begin, i want to talk about my convictions. they are simple: i want to be a nice person, i want to be successful, and i want to be fulfilled. note that these are my answers to the question “is this a source of joy?” posed by father michael himes’ in “three questions.” (himes) let us start with the first one. i want to be a nice person but there is more to it than just that. my actions must be kind as well, not just my words. when i look back on the life i have lived, i want to be able to say that i lived a good life. helping others, mentoring people, sharing my passions with the world – these must happen if i am to say i was a nice person. secondly, i want to be a successful person. i see success as somewhat necessary for me to be happy. they are not complements by any means, but they are not mutually exclusive either. positively o’connor 2 correlated, certainly, but not a perfect correlation. if i succeed then i feel i will be better able to facilitate my own happiness, both through selfish pursuits and giving back to others. this is why i want to be a professor later on in life. i plan to go out into the world and fail. i will succeed sometimes, yes, but as a ski instructor once told me: “if you aren’t falling you aren’t learning.” once i have failed enough that i am successful, i want to teach the lessons i have learned. there is no point in experiencing failure, and life as a whole, alone. if great men had not shared what they learned, i would be hunting and gathering for nuts right now. this aspect of sharing my experiences leads me to my third point, fulfillment. fulfillment is something that i believe comes at the end of our lives. happiness and joy are fleeting moments of fulfillment that we experience on the path to fulfillment – they give us a taste of the greatness that is to come. integration, in a math sense, is regarded as the process of adding up many parts. to this end, the summation of these three convictions is what i want to achieve in my life. as the man in the arena, i am constantly fighting for this. mindfulness is a powerful new weapon that i hope to yield moving forward. now that i know how to know who i am, i am better able to become who i want to become. the second aspect to look at is metacognition. this is, as the prompt says, thinking about thinking. metacognition allows us to look past what i see as the binary in our lives. as tasha eurich said, we need to “ask what not why” (eurich 2017). this is key if i really want to live a life worth living. i have said that i want to fail, and fail often. metacognition will allow me to see what caused me to fail. this is essential. i cannot become a sheep, as deresiewicz puts it. he claims that ivy students, the cream of the crop, have been taught how “to ‘be a student,’ not to use their minds” (deresiewicz 2014). i am glad that i have been enlightened to the rat race that seemingly plagues the american teenage experience, and i am ready to change. when i o’connor 3 encounter a setback, or even succeed, i will seek out what the root cause was. like deresiewiczsays, “what we don't have, in other words, are thinkers. people who can think for themselves” (deresiewicz 2010). i need to learn to think for myself. it is time to get off the treadmill. i touched on my pls seminar earlier in this paper and would like to speak more on it. switching into pls was, what i believe to be, me thinking for myself. it was what i wanted to do, not what my parents, teachers, or future employers wanted me to do. this leap of faith was just that: a leap. it was frightening to pursue my passion. maybe that is because i was once a sheep, to use deresiewicz’s language. so far, i have loved it. the texts are engaging and the seminar aspect of the class offers me a chance to hear the perspectives of others – something that i now realize is essential to the learning process. this was one of the first times in my life that i did something that i wanted, not in a selfish sense, but out of pure zeal to learn something new. i finally found a way to translate my passion for reading into something greater. in my first integration i spoke of becoming a vintager in the vineyard of my mind, harvesting the fruits of my labor at the end of my life. back then, however, i was lost. i had a goal but no path, no map. now, with mindfulness and metacognition, i think i may be found. i now believe that it is possible for me to reach my end goal. now that i know what i must do, the onus is mine to bear as the man in the arena. as teddy roosevelt said in his speech the man in the arena: “there is no effort without error” (roosevelt 1910). i will try and i will fail. many times. however, i look forward to this challenge. imagine the moment i realize i am fulfilled, how great that will feel. to reflect on my entire life and feel joy. that is truly what i want. capstone integration sheppard sheppard 1 maria alexandra sheppard theo helm moreau first year experience 29 april, 2022 the ultimate strategy of a life well-lived based on the experiences of a first-year college student my first year as a college student is coming to an end. ever since flying away from home, family, and comfort zones, my life has traveled through di�erent situations that have allowed me to visualize life from other perspectives. after several months of having started this journey, i have put together the ultimate strategic plan to achieve a life well-lived. first and foremost, the definition of a life well-lived varies upon every person. for me, a life well-lived is about being in sync with what fulfills your heart and whatever makes your brain explore out of curiosity. before elaborating on the strategy, i have to say that learning and exploring the bases of a life well-lived was no easy task and it included challenges that made it hard at times to find the strength to keep on going. i believe that for all of this, personal values are the most essential aspect of what will guide us to our own lives well-lived, along my strategy, of course. here’s how the strategy goes… step one is recognizing that stepping back is not a synonym for failure, let alone giving up. taking step backs allow us to perceive a picture we have never seen before, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“ why do we need to slow down our lives ,” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). this is easier said than done because of the fast-paced environment we live in every single day. the world will never stop rotating, cars will never stop going, people will never stop working, but taking a step back makes us see the true meaning and purpose behind every homeworkd we do, every job we take, and every food we eat. step two is doing everything that is under your control to make the best at preventing the hateful “what if’s”. to achieve this, trusting ourselves regardless of challenges and https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ sheppard 2 situations, becomes the ultimate tool; “you will never know if you do not try” (“ hesburgh'' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i would be lying if i said i did everything i wanted in the past months. at times, i did not raise my hand when i had something to say in class, and i did not scream out of happiness after a successful day. we should dance more whenever dancing seems nice and laugh whenever something makes us laugh, this is the only way of preventing the “what if’s” and clear the road to a more life-filled life. step three is looking around you and starting appreciating the little things! we talk about all the plans and expectations we have and everything we hope to achieve, when in reality we are not able to appreciate the great taste of that cup of co�ee i drank in the morning or the pretty smile someone gave me throughout the day. to some extent, what sister aletheia said, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“ meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three), is true but overall, just being aware that life goes on so fast is what will allow us to appreciate things more and live to the fullest. step four is being opened to experiences. it is through the toughest times that we put ourselves to the test and grow. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four), they really do because we learn and get stronger from them. within these lines, step five is being surrounded by people that matter to you and that are with you though the di�erent experiences in life. getting to know who you people are is an essential part of our development that leads to the accomplishment of our goals. one of my pillars is my mom, she always knows what to say, and knows how to elevate my potential above and beyond, “no matter where you go, always rely on square one” (“discernment conversationactivity” with my mom, jeni�er espino moreau fye week five). step six is knowing not everything is for you, and that is okay. in life we tend to downgrade ourselves whenever we are not able to do something. truth is, not everything is meant for us to do or achieve. instead of backing down upon all the di�erent things we cannot do, let’s work towards the best version of ourselves by complementing everything we can https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ sheppard 3 indeed achieve; “i will utilize these five minutes and do something about it instead of just focusing on what i cannot do” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six), adversities are inevitable, challenges are always involved, but if you think about the “yes’s” instead of the “no’s”, you become unstoppable. the fact that not everything is for you, means that the world compliments each other by implementing our capabilities within distinct areas that overall seek for the best for humanity. step seven is then, knowing that the world works better together. “how wonderful would it be if solidarity, this beautiful and, at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic, and scientific choices, as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples, and countries” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven), an impactful quote pope francis stated as he explained the wonders that would come along if we implement not only the technologies and innovations that are taking place as of now but an increase in solidarity and other values that are essential to human nature, furthermore community. here is when the strategy can become tricky, how do we keep going when the circumstances are not favorable? well, step eight is acknowledging that solidarity can make a major impact on how we perceive things. “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompanimentl a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine),a quote from professor steve reifenberg that describes how each and every one of us provides several di�erent values to the world we live in, in several di�erent ways. accompaniment supports the idea that we are working to help people, and by helping others we help ourselves. it gives us purpose, the why within our lives, which is something not many people find out until very late in their paths. by embracing solidarity, we are also embracing humanity, which is step nine in the strategic plan. “we experience a challenge to our racial worldview as a challenge to our very identities as good, moral people” (“ why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten), summing up what the challenge with racism really is. everybody is di�erent and that is what ultimately https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit?usp=sharing sheppard 4 makes the world so special. embracing our di�erences will lead to a better world, and a better future. as the last steps in the plan are approaching, it is more than necessary to include the importance of echo chambers’ recognition within our society, and furthermore within ourselves. “we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“ how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven), a quote that resembles how the lack of open-mindedness towards other people’s opinions leads to the lack of our own wisdom, which is why step ten is critical. being wise is not about knowing it all, but rather not knowing it all and being willing to accept other perspectives to cultivate your own into their best version. accepting other perspectives and points of view was part of my growing process throughout my first year of college, and would most likely be a part in the next three. it takes courage to accept when we do not know something and even more to start working for things. this semester i had the opportunity to reflect on allyship, as part of step eleven, by volunteering at la casa de amistad. within the lines of allyship, i can see how volunteering there helps me re-evaluate what happens in my life and it allows for personal growth. i have always enjoyed volunteering because that was the time when i grew the most; la casa provided me with a space to learn and get to know what matters to me even more. looking back to all the steps required for the strategy in achieving a life well-lived, i have left the most important step as the last one to increase its meaning and true impact it has on our lives. step twelve is believing in your personal purpose and statement. at the end of the day, we could all follow a 1-10 step mechanism into achieving a better life, but the key to it all is understanding what a “better life” means to ourselves as individuals first. regardless of whether i get to completely understand my purpose in life, there are essential learnings that have allowed me to grow and be better, for myself and the ones around me. i can assure you that this strategic plan is successful, although it might take me three more years to prove it all the way. nevertheless, everything we do in life should be powered by our strongest thoughts and motivated by our capabilities. execution of the ultimate strategy for a life well-lived starts now, e�ected immediately. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s sheppard 5 remembering sofia today we are gathered to mourn the loss of a life. a life lived in a way that touched all of us in different ways. i am sure that in the past few days, we have all been looking back at our time with sofia, cherishing the beautiful moments, regretting the not-so-beautiful moments, and wishing that we could have just one more moment, beautiful or not. maybe some of us are angry, angry at the universe for allowing the concept of death. death that strips us of our loved ones. death that ruthlessly strips our loved ones of their breath. i think that to begin to heal, to even begin to rightfully honor sofia today, we must forgive death for its actions. it is not something that we can fear or hate. it is something, i think, we need to respect. right along with our respect for the beauty of life, we must respect the loss of death. it is superficial and inauthentic to lose sight of the facts of life and simply focus on what looks and sounds pretty. death is not a beautiful thing, but it is important and necessary. it should be used as motivation to be who you want to be, and that is beautiful. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). sofia embodied this motivation, and today, we are not only mourning her loss, but celebrating her life. i am sure that if you think back to your experiences knowing sofia, you would say she was a happy person. she was full of life and kind and not only always asked you how you were doing, but really cared about your answer. but sofia wasn’t a happy person, or that is, she was not always happy. no one is. she struggled with herself, with remaining hopeful and composed when things got hard. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”. sofia was a joyful person, with no exceptions. happiness is a fragile construct of time and place, while joy is something constant. and her joy inspired her from behind the negativity. (“three key questions” from father michael himes – moreau fye week three). it is through her joyful nature that sofia was able to live life in the way she did, and touch your lives in such a profound way. there is no denying that sofia was someone to look up to. she put countless years into her education, becoming well respected in her field of neurosurgery, but more importantly, she put work into herself to become the woman she wanted to be. i remember a conversation i had many, many years back with sofia. her insight took me by surprise, and her words will stick with me forever. she was studying for her mcat, extremely stressed, and we went to get coffee as a study break. sofia got quiet, seemingly pondering her words, and said: “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture”. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). a lot of sofia’s life was stressful. i mean, she did surgery on brains. and it took sofia a while to learn how to manage this stress. the more you need to do, the less time you feel allowed to provide for your mental health. and it is in that moment that it is more important than ever that you need to create a positive mindset. in every moment of growth in her life, sofia took a step further back from the canvas, recognizing the insignificance of seemingly life-shattering events, and understanding her role in this world. if we were to define sofia, all of us in this room would be a part of that definition. all of the people she passed on the street and smiled at would be a part of that definition, but not in the way that we would be. we would not only be the words that make up the definition, but the meaning derived from it. if there was anything that made sofia live her life in the way she did, it was for those around her. living a good life involves surrounding yourself with others, having meaningful interactions and encounters that fill us up with belonging. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). this is what sofia did. she made personal connections with each and every one of us. she hated surface level relationships, and made deep ones with those that she felt were worth it. but it is important to realize that sofia filled herself up with belonging not only through us, who her memory will live on through, but also through herself. it was a journey to get there, given the amount of herself she put in others, but it was in her travels that she became one with herself and learned how to be satisfied by her solidarity. her travels around the world, europe and asia, the countries she has family in – the dominican republic and puerto rico – were full of people. of culture. of new and flourishing relationships. but the only constant in her travels was herself. in my opinion, this is what shaped sofia into who we remember her as today. a beautiful, inspiring person who will be missed. it is a beautiful thing to be missed. it is a beautiful thing to remember such an incredible life. it is a beautiful thing to have known sofia. we are gathered here today to celebrate the beautiful, magnificent life of . she was loved by many, and was a kind soul who lived a great life. the most important thing about her life was not how many people she reached, but how impactful she was with the ones she did. she was dedicated to her work, as well as those around her, which is something that i believe to be very difficult, something many people only dream of being able to do. in her lifetime she worked to further understand the brain and its functions. she loved truly loved her job, she “also view[ed] studying what you love as highly practical” and thus concluded that it just made sense that she should devote her time to something she cared so much about (week 4: "navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development). however, this is not to say that she didn’t struggle at times. she understood that “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” and, i believe this is in part what allowed her to lead such a good life (week 7: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences ). she cared about her work, due to the details as well as the bigger picture of it. she wanted to create a community of caring individuals, and did this by surrounding herself with those who loved her the way she loved them. she was an amazing friend in so many aspects, understanding that each person is different and unique in their own way. she wanted people to be happy, and many times put others before herself in order to achieve this. when giving advice she knew that “we need to see others as other people! not to project on them what we would like if we were in their shoes because we are not in their shoes” (week 3: "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" (ruth graham, ny times)). she knew that we couldn’t simply change people and force them to be who we wanted them to be. each person has their own perspectives and values which impact the way that they act. everyone is uniquely different, yet “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others” (week 7: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences). her understanding of this allowed her to have such a positive impact on so many people’s lives. i remember in one conversation with her she told me how she “strive[s] for self-growth, as well as being more empathic. [she] like[s] to see new perspectives on things and offer advice” (week 5: a conversation with a friend). she was constantly working on deeper understanding of herself, which in turn allowed her to be more in tune with others. she was someone who loved just as easily as she forgave them. she sometimes struggled with understanding why when people would repeatedly end up hurting her, which is something that at some point proved difficult for her. she would sometimes feel like the world was against her. i even remember telling her one time, “if you ask why, you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality” perhaps you will be able to resolve this issue (week 6: “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences)). she really took this to heart i think, because she realized that often, she only saw the good in people. however, this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, and i think she realized that too. one of the best things about bridget though, was her ability to have fun, and live in the moment. of course, when the time came to be serious she was, but when it was time for a day off, she was able to enjoy it stress free, and in turn help others enjoy it too. she viewed days off as “the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda” and treated them accordingly (week 1: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted). she looked up to many people, whether they were directly in her life, or were larger well known figures. she recognized father hesburgh as a great person who she wished to have similar attributes to. she said his approach to life is inspiring since “as far as the catholic church goes, he was a big of a renegade to rules. he used common sense” (week 2: "hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley)). she also looked up to her father and his work ethic. she hoped she one day would be like him, and in many ways she was, but her differences from him made her an even better person because they made her who she was. was a bubbly, exciting spirit and i consider it an honor to have known her and been able to consider myself one of her friends. while her time on this earth was fleeting, it was one of great importance. she may not be remembered throughout history for creating a revolution, or halting a war, but she will live on eternally in our memories, which was all she ever really wished for. i recall talking with her about death on a few occasions, and the thought of it was never something that scared her. she was wise in that she was aware of reality, aware of how small and insignificant we all are in this universe. she recognized that the world and the universe itself is much greater than many realize. however, this fact did not cause her fear or despair, but rather the opposite. by recognizing how small we really were, she was able to appreciate the little things in life, believing that at the end of the day, that was all we really had. this life could easily be seen as meaningless when looking at the bigger picture, but she recognized that the reason things were important is because we give them meaning. we choose our path by discerning what we find as important and what we put our time and energy towards. her ability to recognize this allowed her to become the amazing person that we remember her as. integration #3.pdf shari ho 2/25/22 integration #3: my life well-lived there are many components in living a life well-lived, and also many different perspectives of what is considered to be a life well-lived. in this paper, i will be going through what i think is a life well-lived and how i want to live now and in the future. i won’t be following the eulogy format for this assignment and i will format it like the intergerations we did last semester. the first step in living a life well-lived is to self-reflect and to understand yourself. over the years, i found this to be so important to live the life i want to live. in pico iyer’s article, why we need to slow down our lives, he said “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) this is so important because since i am constantly preoccupied with work and school, i sometimes lose track of what i truly want to do with my life and what truly makes me happy. getting distracted by my hectic life and schedule prevents me from reflecting on myself, so i try to take time for myself and relax and think about the bigger picture like iyer said. in doing so, i understand and remember how i want to conduct my life and act accordingly in the future so that i am on the right path. in determining what a life well-lived is, it is important to realize that not everyone is perfect. we all have our flaws and we all make mistakes, but that doesn’t mean we didn’t live a life well-lived. father hesburgh said in a film made about him, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) there is so much truth in what father hesburgh said, as our stories are not complete without our mistakes, as they shape us into the people we are today. however, the only way to live a life well-lived even though we make mistakes is by learning from them and being better in the future. when you repeat your mistakes and do not change, you are not living a life well-lived. i have made some mistakes during my time here at notre dame. however, i learned from them and i made sure to never let it happen again, and that is the best way i can live a life well-lived. another way to live a life well-lived is to remember and be aware of one of the beliefs of sister alethia. sister alethia is a nun who emphasized the inevitability of death, as she believed that “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) even though it's a bit morbid, this mindset is so important to comprehend to fully see the limited time we actually have on this earth. it is a fact that everyone, including myself, will die one day and leave this earth. scientifically, we only know we have one life, and after realizing this, i have to ask myself, what do i genuinely want to do with this one life? how can i make the most change and be the happiest and live the life well-lived we have been talking about all semester? i thought deeply about this and i realized my dream and goals and mapped out my life that meets everything i want to do by the time i die, which is that i want to become a doctor and treat people in developing countries who can’t receive it themselves. i have a clear path i want to work for that has meaning for myself and for others, which is one step closer in living a life well-lived. a big part of everyone’s lives is their job occupation, and defining if someone is living a life-well lived greatly ties to one’s career. in my mind, there is a lot of controversy between which jobs fit the “life well-lived” criteria, as there are so many different career paths from doctor, mailman/woman, pilot, singer, cafeteria worker, teacher, politician, lawyer, actor/actress, and so much more. what makes one “better” than the other? dr. donald super created a theory about career decision making, and with this, he said, “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) this method of choosing a career highlights something very important, which is that your career doesn’t have to fulfill one thing. i think a big misconception people make is that living a life-well lived means saving lives or working at non-profit organizations or doing something that solely benefits others. these are definitely all ways to live a life-well lived, but it isn’t the only way and that you are allowed to think of yourself and your own self interests when choosing a career path. it isn’t selfish in wanting to have a certain career path that doesn’t conventionally benefit others. there needs to be a balance between all of the aspects super emphasizes to allow one to live a life well-lived. for example, as i mentioned above, i want to be a doctor that treats people in developing countries. i think this is the perfect career path for me because being a doctor can save lives and make people feel better and happier, but also, i am very interested in international affairs and global cultures. i want to travel everywhere and see and meet people i would never meet if i stayed in the states. i want to experience all of what the world has to offer and live my life to the fullest. another reason why this job career is perfect is because my heart breaks for people who were born into poverty and people who had no choice in living a good life. it pains me that children can’t get an education and aren’t allowed the choice to live a better life. i want to use my education to help the people that can’t help themselves. that is how i am going to live a life well-lived. i believe that the quality of my relationships and connections in my life play a huge role in if i lived a life well-lived. pope francis said in a ted talk, “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other,none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) pope francis makes a great point, as connecting with others will help us greatly and because of this, i cherish and respect the opinions of the people i love. now, this is not the same as doing things because of what others want, but it is more like being a good person for the people around you. i care a lot about the opinions of my family and my close friends because i want to make a good impact on their lives, which is why i thought the week 5 activity was important. i interviewed my dad and he told me “you have a good heart and always make me laugh.” (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” by moreau moreau fye week five) hearing this was so meaningful, as my dad is someone whom i admire and trust and that his opinion means the world to me .this activity allowed me to gauge how well of a life i have lived so far, and this is important because living a life well-lived isn’t just for me, but also for the people i love. in everyone’s lives, we encounter hardships and downfalls that make it very difficult to live a life well-lived. for example, what happened to kim jihoon in week six’s course material. jihoon had many goals and aspirations for life like becoming a sushi chef and traveling the world. however, he got into a serious snowboarding accident that left him paralyzed and losing most mobility other than his arms and neck. (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six) this is a very common type of example of how something so unfair can ruin your life forever and in these situations, it is very hard to see yourself living a life well-lived ever again. it is hard to find the good in something that physically and mentally hinders your life forever. however, since there is nothing you can do about it, even though it sucks, you have to find a way to live the happiest, best life you can in the situation you are given. you have to look at the positives and make the best out of what you have and try to live a life well-lived as best as you can. this is how i will live a life well-lived. integration 4 fr. kevin sandberg integration four 16 april 2022 becoming a servant leader in the first week back after spring break we began learning about what it would be like to walk around in somebody else's shoes for a day. we were talking about this in terms of empathy and i think this module really ties into the idea of social change. at the time we were asked who’s shoes we would be inclined to walk around in to become a better versed person. i wrote about how i would walk around in the shoes of a ukrainian citizen and six weeks later i would still do the same. these people are suffering awful and incomprehensible losses and they are being uprooted from their homes. in the six weeks since i last wrote about ukraine, the situation has worsened significantly. six weeks ago ukrainian men were leaving ireland to go fight for their own country, and since many have unfortunately passed away. how are any of us ever meant to understand this level of loss? in class we watched a video of a woman cleaning the hospital in ukraine and she claimed “my mop is my weapon”, all of these people were trying to do whatever they could to help their own people and keep those sick and injured people safe. this woman was a prime example of a selfless leader, similar to ukraine’s own president volodymyr zelenskyy, who didn’t flee ukraine when he got the chance, but stayed for the good of his nation. being in the shoes of these servant leaders would be my worst nightmare, but we have too much to learn from these people. there are ukrainian citizens moving to ireland and they are so grateful to be there, they are teaching us something about what it means to be grateful for the little things in life. they are just happy to be with their families and many of them aren’t even with the men in their families. while we can’t physically walk around in the shoes of these people we need to be making a conscious effort to do as much as possible to help them and to show them solidarity. i can imagine that the article from dean g. marcus cole in week 9, describes what many of the surviving ukrainians are feeling, in that “we must do something. there is something each one of us can do” and we should be feeling exactly like this too, in order to make a difference. in week 10 we learned all about the concept of accompaniment. i was really delighted to learn about this topic as i believe it will be one of the sole reasons for us becoming selfless, servant leaders. the author, steve reifenberg wrote about getting sick in an orphanage where he was volunteering in chile. this experience helped him to realize that he thought of himself as a sort of white savior who was going to help the children but they ended up helping him significantly more than he ever would have imagined. this reminded me of a time where i was in india and they told us that we wouldn’t be allowed to take any photos of the volunteering work we were doing there because of “whitewash”, which is when white people would go to developing countries and post pictures of their volunteering all over their social media. they explained that this really takes away from the work that we were actually there to do, and i’m really glad they told us this because it was probably one of the bigger life lessons that i learned in my teenage years. the reading helped me to realize that, in order to be a good accompagnateur, one needs to be selfless, caring and not concerned with their own self image when helping those around us. there are many ways that we serve as accompagnateurs to those around us, as long as we are doing it completely selflessly. i plan on doing this by completely helping my sister as she goes through her big exams this summer, as steve reinenberg says in “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” , “we need to walk together and learn https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/770254?module_item_id=199797 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/770254?module_item_id=199797 together, and maybe, together, envision and create something better”. i also think that this can very much be applied in the situation in ukraine, if people in power come together to help zelensky, the impact of the war can be massively reduced. in week 11 i read anna haskins’ talk called “educational inequality”, and it was under the module on building an anti-racist vocabulary. i picked this video to watch as i wasn’t really sure what it would entail, and looking back on this that was quite naive of me. this video linked directly into the conversation surrounding our capacity for social change. coming from ireland, where everyone has an equal opportunity to attend school, i was thoroughly shocked and saddened when watching this video. professor haskins talked about african american children not being on the same playing field in terms of education for many different reasons. if their parents are incarcerated they are much less likely to attend school, and black inmates make up 40% of inmates in american prisons. this makes the black children severely disadvantaged which is a huge social issue. she went on to talk about how the prison system is beginning to get to the root of the problem, by placing a higher value on education within prisons. watching this video sort of made me reflect upon myself and realize how much i don’t really know about racism in america. this is a topic that i realize i really need to educate myself on, not only for my own good but for the good of others. i believe that the likes of professors such as anna haskins are the perfect examples of who we should aspire to be like in terms of shining a light on such issues of social change. i also think that this slightly ties into what we learned in week 4 of moreau about “the gifts of a mentoring environment” by sharon daloz parks. i believe that we should look to people such as professor haskins for mentoring if social change and justice is something that you are interested in. it is all about looking for mentors in the right places. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/modules/items/174623 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/580889?module_item_id=180911 in week 12 we read “the good life method” by meghan sullivan and paul blaschko, and this week was heavily centered on wisdom. this module really got me thinking about how people's life experiences lead them to be wise in many different ways. the example i used in my writing from that week was that the current children of ukraine will be wise beyond years, in terms of resilience and bravery, much more so than any of us will ever be. i think the quote from meghan sullivan in this article is very prevalent to the ukrainians, “we cannot predict which kinds of sufferings and loss we will have to face, or even when death will come”. unfortunately these children didn’t have any say in gaining this wisdom but rather it was forced upon them. oftentimes people grow through what they go through and these circumstances are often terribly sad. this module made me think about who i turn to for wisdom. i turn to my parents and grandparents for advice about things that they have all been through, and i realize that i am lucky enough to have my parents and grandparents around to share this wisdom with me. but i think the most important thing that i learned about in terms of wisdom, is in order to become wise yourself, you have to surround yourself with experienced and wise people from many different backgrounds. in order to be wise you must also learn from your own mistakes and that if you repeatedly make the same mistake, you are unlikely to become wise. in week 13 we read “stalking” by annie dillard in a week that was all about transcendence, which i believe is the perfect way to wrap up a year of learning to better ourselves and take this knowledge outside of notre dame. we were tasked to talk about how far up the mountain of life and the college journey we are this week. this week i talked about how many of us had to sacrifice a good bit in our lives in order to be here at notre dame, but how it is all so worth it looking back after just one year. having one year done, i think that we can really look back and see how far we have come and how much i have changed in just the span of one https://philosophybreak.com/articles/the-good-life-method-interview-with-meghan-sullivan-and-paul-blaschko/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/580892?module_item_id=180918 year. from where we are standing there is also so much to look up and forward to. i think the most important thing that we can do with our notre dame education is to take it outside of notre dame and to share it with others and with the world. i think about how much social change could be made if we took our strong convictions into the world and acted upon them just as we have been thought to do. untitled document moreau capstone integration april 29, 2022 prof. chan pursuing a life well lived my mission statement reads: i am put on this earth by god, and my purpose is to know, love, and serve him. i can best know him by being a lifelong learner, hungry for knowledge about all aspects of his creation and therefore of him as well. i can best love him by loving those around me, for he has told us that “amen, i say to you, whatever you did for one of these least brothers of mine, you did for me.” i can best serve him by serving others and by using my many unique talents for the betterment of my friends, family, community, and the world as a whole. above all, i must not ever turn my back on him. to best know him, i ought to always approach each person with whom i interact as someone from whom i can learn, regardless of differences in race, sex, class, age, or education level. i ought to approach each problem that life presents as another challenge that i am called to learn from and grow from, not as merely an obstacle to be obliterated. to best love him, i ought to always strive to see the good in others, even those with whom i disagree and those who are actively working against me. despite the differences between us, including those in which they might actually be objectively wrong or advancing evil, i ought to see them as fellow children of god. to best serve him, i ought to make sure that my considerable talents are put to use for the common good rather than the maximization of my wealth. i must never give in to the twin evils of pride and false humility when i am recognized for my achievements, but instead use the encouragement to rededicate myself to my mission. above all, whatever my path in life, i must never waiver from commitment to god. (moreau fye week 13, ). i believe that the above mission statement is a good guide for life. to be honest, i think the prompt is a little un-thought-out; a mission statement that animates only the next three years of your life isn’t a very good one. if life is my mission, i certainly hope that it will last longer than the next three years. do the people who put together moreau know something i don’t? even further, the second semester is about a “life well-lived,” and there is more to life than the college setting. however, given that this essay is graded with a rubric and i would like to receive a good grade, the path forward seems clear. it’s fairly obvious how the “learning” part of my mission statement will animate the next three years of my life. i am at one of the best universities in the country, with some amazing resources at my disposal. i will strive to use every single one of them. one moreau unit which spoke most directly on learning was week 11, which concerned growing in wisdom. in every subject other than math, there are two sides to every debate or topic. if i want to learn, i must learn both sides. i need to avoid echo chambers. it can be rather hard to do that, especially in our current culture. it seems like you can’t actually avoid echo chambers anymore; rather, you have to be in multiple conflicting echo chambers in order to try to get a glimpse of the truth (moreau fye week 11, dr. paul blasko). i’m writing this one day after a clip of ari melber complaining on msnbc about elon musk buying twitter went viral. in the clip, he says you own all of twitter or facebook or what have you. you don’t have to explain yourself. you don’t even have to be transparent. you could secretly ban one party’s candidate or all of their candidates. all of its nominees. or you could secretly turn down the reach of their stuff and turn up the reach of something else and the rest of us might not even find out about it til after the election (link). this clip so clearly demonstrates the need to avoid echo chambers. i’m sure that melber is well-educated. he probably is smarter than average, and probably considers himself fair and generally impartial. but everything he just said is what conservatives have been complaining about for years. despite being smart, he either hasn’t heard those complaints because of his echo chamber or hasn’t taken them seriously because he thinks himself better than those making them. either way, the echo chamber is the problem. notre dame is perhaps the best place to go to avoid echo chambers. it is conservative for a school of its caliber, but liberal for the country as a whole. there are college democrats and college republicans, but also college libertarians. campus ministry is theologically “progressive” while there are many student clubs like children of mary which are theologically “traditional.” organizations like prism or articles like growing up gay and catholic (moreau week 10) advance a notion of catholicism which is rejected by other organizations on campus. it would be especially hard at notre dame to graduate without ever hearing opposing viewpoints. in addition to learning how to avoid echo chambers, i’ve learned some critical tools for evaluating my life and my actions. exhortations for “mindfulness” or meditation, like pico iyer's (moreau fye week 1) or the right way to be introspective (moreau fye week 6), have (inadvertently) spurred on a new approach to prayer in my life. while i used to usually just sit in a chapel silently, i now go on a walk around the lakes talking aloud. it makes it a lot easier to stop your thoughts from drifting, as well as being a good opportunity to smoke. i’ve learned about figures i can look up to, like fr. ted hesburgh. while the movie about him we watched for https://www.msn.com/en-us/news/opinion/msnbc-host-trashed-for-warning-elon-musk-could-use-twitter-to-ban-political-candidates-e2-80-98you-absolute-clown-e2-80-99/ar-aawc9vz https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ moreau, hesburgh, doesn’t mention any of his more regrettable actions, the idealized hesburgh they hold up serves as a good model for my life. although i expect it to look very different from fr. ted’s, i hope that i can demonstrate the same dedication to the downtrodden that he is known for. i can best love god by loving others, and notre dame also makes that easier. while it is easy to love some people, i often find it hard to love others. i bring this up in confession often. today as i was leaving north dining hall i saw some chalk writing advancing opinions that i would characterize as climate hysteria, written for the purpose of either venting or peacocking and demonstrating that the author had the correct views. either way, i felt a twinge of annoyance and disdain for the author. i realized as i was walking away that this was yet another opportunity to love people. perhaps the person who wrote those outside of north (and all over campus) simply cares very deeply about that issue to the point of having blinders on. perhaps they’ve fallen prey to an echo chamber. perhaps i have. either way, i can love them, and in this case loving them means simply walking away not thinking about it. that’s a fairly easy thing to do. i can continue to do that for the next three years, and indeed for the rest of my life. i have also learned much more on how best to serve others while at notre dame, and i foresee learning much more about it in the next three years. the first way that i can serve others is through my career. the three key questions document (moreau fye week 4) has helped me see what career i want to pursue, which will likely be something at the intersection of mathematics and finance, or, as a fallback, the benevolent despot of a banana republic. the conversation that i had with my friend j.a. hatch also helped me see what sorts of changes i need to make in my life to ensure that i retain my moral compass in an industry so famously immoral. pope francis, in his ted address, urged faithful catholics that building the future https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://cdn.inst-fs-iad-prod.inscloudgate.net/78837e86-dc2e-4c63-846e-a469fb69b41f/%22three%20key%20questions%22%20(adapted%20from%20fr.%20michael%20himes)?token=eyjhbgcioijiuzuxmiisinr5cci6ikpxvcisimtpzci6imnkbij9.eyjyzxnvdxjjzsi6ii83odgzn2u4ni1kyzjlltrjnjmtodq2zs1hndy5zmi2owi0mwyvjtiyvghyzwulmjblzxklmjbrdwvzdglvbnmlmjilmjaoywrhchrlzcuymgzyb20lmjbgci4lmjbnawnoywvsjtiwsgltzxmpiiwidgvuyw50ijoiy2fudmfziiwidxnlcl9pzci6ije0mdcymdawmdawmdazndy2miisimlhdci6mty1mte3ode2ocwizxhwijoxnjuxmjy0nty4fq.e6u_gzafqja8w89dpdwheplf-a3xokdnbqh-wggga_85abkak7xqqsgm7afpyh0petijcfmkzczcxia9dj76og&download=1&content_type=application%2fpdf requires the participation of everyone (pope francis, moreau fye week 7). i take that to mean that it also requires the talents of everyone. therefore, even a finance career can help better all of mankind as long as i retain that moral compass. as i progress through the university, i will be guided by my vision of building a better world to best serve others. in conclusion, my mission animates me in life, and specifically in these next three years. i want to fight back against evil wherever i see it, whether it takes the form of the abhorrent racism that dean cole experience (moreau fye week 12) or the form of somethings smaller, like pineapple on pizza. i want to learn everything i can about, well, everything. i want to love every person i see, as challenging as it might be. i want to do all of these things because it is what god wants and demands, and there is no place better to learn to do it than notre dame. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146094 capstone integration new hobbies, more community at nd my mission statement: i value truth and seek to grow my wisdom in all areas; but without pride, i recognize areas where i am not an expert and where i may be wrong. i am grateful for the energy that i receive through quality relationships and hope to use that energy to love by simply seeing and listening to others that are often ignored. away from the business of my schoolwork, i always maintain a space for personal creativity within my day. the truth that i find through my interactions with others–and later reflection upon these events through my creative endeavors–continuously develops my definition of peacefulness (mission statement by evan wood moreau fye week thirteen). the most important component to pursuing my mission statement throughout notre dame is to maintain time for my creative endeavors such as free writing in a journal or writing short stories. however, my free writing is not for anyone else–not for a course assignment or to show others. instead, i try to adapt pascal’s thinking while writing and give myself time alone in a room with no ‘productive’ task at hand: “all the unhappiness of men,” the seventeenth-century french mathematician and philosopher blaise pascal famously noted, “arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). oftentimes, the best thing i can do to take a break from schoolwork, is to be alone in my room–content to write whatever i may want. when i write alone, however, i write about my observations of the outside world. a major source of inspiration for my writing are the walks i take from class to class in which i let my mind wander to fantastical places. i like building connections within my writing, between ideas i encounter in my courses and random observations i make while outside. in a way, this process is similar to what father jenkins said about father hesburgh’s goal: “[ted] often said that the latin word for priest was pontifex, bridge builder” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christing o’malley moreau fye week two). it is incredibly rejuvenating to daydream on my walks instead of fruitlessly worrying about how i’m best going to use my time once i get to my destination. building bridges between many different ideas also helps my mind avoid falling into ruts: “when we examine the causes of our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors — which we often do by asking ourselves why? questions — we tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week six). when i reflect in my journal, i end up cycling through many different answers or ideas as to why i may be feeling a certain way. for example, i have sometimes felt as if i don’t belong at notre dame, or that some people within my immediate nd community hold ill feelings towards me. regardless of whether others hold negative judgements of me or not, i find it helpful to do as father greg boyle suggests: “close both eyes; see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled by the burden of our persistent judgments, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion.” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). when i take a moment to write, i can distance myself from the uncomfortableness that these thoughts can bring, and find that these judgements lose their power. through writing, i’ve slowly realized that i have likely fictionalized these ill feelings towards me, and the best way to move past them is to try to let them go: “by letting go of these negative expectations of others, he was better https://docs.google.com/document/d/1l_3mcvtwjldp9u0f0qbfwafbq0detoi8/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 able to appreciate those around him.” (integration by evan wood moreau fye week eight). through journaling, i’ve also hypothesized that a lack of communication between myself and some members of the nd community led to these ideas within myself: if i don’t talk with someone, i can never understand what they actually think of me–my mind makes something up to fill the gap. therefore, i have try my best to reach out to, and accompany, as many people as i can: “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). even if it turns out that a group of people do hold ill feelings towards me, it will be easier to brush those judgements aside when i approach social interactions as a team effort–with mistakes allowable by both sides: “it is not that we take sides against sinful enemies; before the lord all of us are sinners and none is an enemy.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week twelve). when i keep in mind that everyone makes mistakes, i have no need to be afraid of embarrassing myself–and thereby garnering more ill feelings towards myself. instead, the best i can do is to approach people with sincerity, respectfulness, and kindness: “i started to pay more attention to my friendships, and realized that i had become guarded and shallow in all of them—partly out of fear,” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). others can see how well i have adhered to my mission statement by how many new things i tried throughout my time at nd. while at nd, i’ve tried my hand at new hobbies like writing, running, skateboarding; new clubs such as cheme car, and hopefully in the future, more new hobbies such as singing. while the thought of starting as an amateur can be daunting when i start new activities, this minor source of anxiety is soothed when i keep in mind that failure is expected: “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order.” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). i think i am propelled towards experiencing many different things because i understand i only have three more years left at nd: “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful.” sister aletheia(“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). notre dame has offered me so many beautiful communities–the marching band, and cheme car–that i was initially hesitant to join because of a lack of competency in these activities beforehand. however, i’m incredibly grateful for the time i’ve had with these campus families because they’re not easily found elsewhere. however, i don’t just want to stop with the band community. there seems to be many other student led organizations around interests of mine that i wish to join even though i am not terrific at any of them like the observer newspaper or the liturgical choir. some may critique my time at nd by saying that i only superficially engage in activities by not trying to master any specific one: “they’re not trying to empower anything. they’re really just trying to learn and engage in a pretty frivolous way” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven). however, i believe that i can still deeply engage with the communities around these activities and form meaningful connections, despite my lack of focus on mastering the activities. during the marching band season last fall semester, the most memorable moments were not during the https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/17uvc6jtzyvro-qw-p71pa0jqbqm01gqaj1xbgamklu4/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ performance itself, but during the practices when i got to talk and laugh with other members of my band section. my approach to extracurriculars connects to what my dad said about me during our interview: “[evan] [desires] to bring others joy above most everything else.” (interview with my dad moreau fye week five). i gain mental energy from these extracurriculars not because i excel at them, but because of the community that i get the opportunity to interact with. https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1q75sxfvfuhomzvofdpwc5mf4uf6dvppuixyuqxhqem4/edit microsoft word moreau integration #3 word doc.docx cox 1 professor pruitt moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 treating others and yourself well is to live well if i died tomorrow, would i look back and consider my life well-lived? it is hard to say because i know i have so much more ahead of me. there are many people to love and places to visit and foods to try and experiences to have that i haven’t gotten to yet. that is so exciting. but it is also scary because i don’t know how that all will play out. and when i do finally reach the end of my life, will i consider it well lived? i hope so. the second semester in college seems less tumultuous than the first, giving one the space and time necessary to reflect and decide upon what is bringing your life more or less meaning and to some extent, define what the meaning of your life should be, at least in the moment. i used to think the best way to live a good, satisfactory life was to be happy all the time. it is so easy to fall into the mindset that if you’re never sad or stressed or upset that somehow your life will become more fulfilling. yet this simply isn’t true. in week 6 of moreau we watched a video in which a man named dr. jihoon kim tells his story of how the accident that paralyzed his entire body has changed his perspective on suffering. he says, “the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). there have been many times in college where i have felt overwhelmed or very upset. people say college is supposed to be the best years of your life and when it doesn’t feel like that it can make you feel confused or resentful. i feel like i never get enough sleep and when i do go to sleep i hit cox 2 my head on the ceiling every night because i live like a sardine in a shoebox. i find it so difficult to eat three good, hearty meals in the day and when i do it takes three hours total because of the chaos of the dining hall. i always have too much work and once one assignment gets done another comes along. one of the ways i combat these negative aspects of college is by trying to have perspective and gratitude, as dr. kim does. stress and anxiety and sadness are normal. they will continue to reappear in my life even if i can overcome them right now. therefore, i think to myself, how grateful am i that i get to be at this school and receive this education. despite the stress it brings me, it will also bring me knowledge and discipline. how grateful am i that i get to live in a dorm community of all women where i have met my best friends, even if its crammed, we’re all in it together. by doing this, i face my negative emotions head on and progress emotional towards living a better life. sister aletheia would likely agree with dr. kim’s sentiments. in week three of moreau we read an article about sister aletheia – a nun who has turned the concepts of death and suffering into a religious practice called “moments memori.” in describing her practice she says, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness . . . but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). by encouraging people to think about their death she reminds them to appreciate the present. one of the primary lessons college has reinforced for me is the fleeting nature of time. there is never enough. i go to pickup coffee and suddenly an hour has passed. i go to study and suddenly it is already 2 am. i walk into my friend’s room for a conversation and only emerge three hours later, accidentally of course. especially at a place like cox 3 notre dame, there are infinite opportunities and events to attend. there just never seems to be enough time for all work and rest and social interactions i need. this becomes really overwhelming at times. this year, one of my new year’s resolutions was to try to be more present. although i still struggle with this everyday, i find it truly does make my life more fulfilling when i practice this often, which i hope will lead to an overall life-well lived in the future. in thinking about the future, i often think about what path i will begin on in the years after college. all the different aspects of our lives contribute in some way to an overall welllived life. yet one major attribute is our career. i believe that having a successful and fulfilling career is necessary to living life well. i will be expected to provide for myself one day and i can imagine that if i didn’t like my job i wouldn’t be living out my purpose to the happiest extent. yet i feel the pressure even as a freshman to have everything figured out — what majors and minors to pick up and therefore what career paths will be available to me. in week four of moreau, we examined some resources from the career development center in which they acknowledged that “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (“navigating your career journey” from meruelo center for career development undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). however, they also reassured us this isn’t necessarily true. just a few weeks ago i declared my major as marketing and felt really happy about it. i have begun exploring the different paths notre dame offers in the marketing major and it has reaffirmed this idea for me that my one major doesn’t dictate a specific career path. i hope that my excitement about it as well as the flexibility in the major and someday my career will help me lead a fulfilling work life. cox 4 a lot of the content this semester focused on self reflection and introspection. another crucial aspect of attempting to live life well is being aware of what is and isn’t positively contributing to your life. sometimes, certain things can fit into both of these categories and make it hard to distinguish where to draw the line at which something beneficial turns into something harmful. for myself, i personally think of technology. having a social media and cell phones allows for instantaneous connections and updates from those we love. i feel as though i have begun to appreciate this in a different way since coming to college. staying close to my best friends and family at home is easier than ever when we can argue over who did the world the best in our family group chat and my best friends can facetime me quickly in between classes. however, in the first week of moreau, we read an article about the importance of slowing down especially when it comes to technology. “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). despite the ease with which i can share my life and stay in touch with those i love, my phone can be toxic and addictive, distracting me from what is really important and consuming far too much of my time. technology has made the world more amazing, innovative, and efficient, but also in many ways more stressful. i find myself using my phone as a distraction or a coping mechanism, but it never makes me less stressed. by keeping this in mind and remembering to recenter myself and make the best use of technology, i hope to keep it in line as something that contributes positively to my life. something else that i think is essential to a life well-lived is your relationships with others. you can have a good life, but how good is it truly if you have no one to share it with? i personally think some of the greatest joy we can experience comes from loving and serving others. in week five of moreau, we were instructed to have a conversation with someone close cox 5 to us who knows us well enough to help us discern what a life well-lived is. i chose my mom. when i asked her what she thought i valued most in life she said she thought i valued my relationships. we talked about how trying to understand others as well as being understood gives purpose to one’s life (discernment conversation moreau fye week five). especially at college, what brings me some of the greatest joy is the friends i have made. there are many fun activities and educational lessons that have made my life better, but sharing it with the people around me — helping my friends with homework, ranting over boys, getting every meal together, learning things about them and telling them things about me — is the most meaningful part. in week two of moreau we watched the hesburgh movie — an overview and testament to father ted hesburgh’s life. within the movie he is described as extraordinary, however, “[w]hat made him such an extraordinary figure was that he really didn’t really belong to any one side. he belonged to the side of decency . . . and a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). one way to attempt to define what it means to have a life well lived is to look at the example of others. ask anyone at notre dame and they would likely tell you father hesburgh was an example of a life well lived, meeting some of the most influential people and fighting for civil rights. following hesburgh’s example i think it is important to remember to chose goodness and decency all the time, regardless of “sides.” as cliche as it sounds, one of the most imperative parts of living life well is being a good person and showing love to everyone regardless of their “side” or status. pope francis is also someone who exemplified these ideas. he says that “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope cox 6 francis moreau fye week 7). lots of people think that in order to live a meaningful life you have to change the world. i personally don’t think this. pope francis brings an important perspective that to truly change the world and bring more love in our lives, we have to treat everyone in this way, not just those closest to us. in his ted talk pope francis also says, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” indeed, by loving those around us and recognizing that this is at the core of what makes life meaningful, we make the most important difference. it is a scary thought to think any of our lives wouldn’t be well-lived. to conclude i think i would define a good life as being that someday i will be able to look back on my life and be happy, satisfied, and proud of how i acted and what i believed in this world. however, i don’t think there’s any one specific “formula” or recipe to live life well which makes it difficult to always know what to do. i’m still figuring out how to live on my own in college so it might be a little more time before i decide if i am living truly well. if i had to make an assertation on it, i would say it is by treating others and yourself with kindness that we best attempt to live well. i think the most important thing we can do is a little bit each day, to be happy, to love others, and to be a better person. moreau fye 4 march 2022 hindsight is 202(2): a preemptive eulogy to reflect back on one’s entire life is an impossible task. the insights and biases we develop as we grow and gain new experiences taint our hindsight and inhibit our ability to accurately reflect on previous chapters of our lives. however, as i reflect back on my life today, a few notable people, moments, and lessons remain steadfast. i hope to share some of these pieces of my life in an attempt to appreciate the legacy that they will inadvertently build for me after my death. a recent conversation with my best friend kyiesha gave me a glimpse into how i am perceived by others. if her flattering remarks are accurate, i am satisfied with how i have touched the people around me up until this point (conversation activity moreau fye week 5). the conversation revealed to me that to others, i am someone who is full of passion and deep emotions. i am unafraid to be vulnerable and express my emotions to others. this makes me someone that easily forms meaningful and emotional connections with those around me, and grants me a sense of empathy that helps me better understand those with different experiences. this passion and sensitivity also make me someone that isn’t only passionate about subjects but motivated to advance them and solve any problems that arise along the way. with these two characteristics in mind, i hope to be remembered as someone who actively invests in her relationship and sees the value in uplifting others (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francismoreau fye week 7). through uplifting others, i mobilized communities to fight against pressing humanitarian issues such as climate change and mitigate its effects on the environment. lastly, i want to be remembered as someone who was introspective and validated my own emotions. for most of my life, i struggled to strike a balance between overthinking and impetuousness, due to many external pressures and influences; however, i was eventually able to find the perfect intersection between reason and emotion that allowed me to both appreciate the present moment and recognize the transience of time (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). one philosophy that threaded through the decision-making processes of my life is that of immanuel kant’s, whom i learned about in my introduction to philosophy class at notre dame. he argued that our ability to reason is what distinguishes humans from other living beings and taking advantage of our ability to reason would be fulfilling the potential of inherent human dignity and value. with this in mind, i was able to ease rationale into my behaviors that were largely emotionally charged. i encourage everyone to consider this philosophy as well. as one approaches death, their perspective on what is important in life turns on its head. the enlightenment and peace that comes with the knowledge of an expiration date, so to speak, is both bittersweet and morbid. in the latter half of this eulogy, i hope to share some of what i believe is most important and often overlooked, to achieve a fulfilled life and unregretful death. firstly, i believe that a life well-lived is a life that is lived unapologetically. everyone’s time on earth is fleeting and being able to appreciate, rather than fear, the indisputable fact that everyone will one day disappear into oblivion, one way or another, is empowering. a noteworthy example of someone who lived unapologetically is father theodore hesburgh. he exuded an aura of confidence that played a large role in his ability to influence masses of people and form beautiful relationships in the process (“hesburgh” moreau fye week 2). unfortunately, i was unable to do the same for most of my life. the high-pressure environment caused me to struggle with imposter syndrome while i was in school. as a result, i was unable to reach my fullest potential academically, socially, and even spiritually. i found myself second-guessing myself and discrediting myself for my achievements. inevitably, this took a toll on my self-esteem, which created a negative feedback loop that took getting over my fear of failure to disrupt. after i experienced enough failure to fully understand that “perfection” is unachievable and an imaginative construct created by capitalism, i was also able to let go of my tendency to live for the approval of others and instead, live unapologetically and for myself. living for myself manifested itself in a few ways. firstly, it meant that i had to undergo a process of learning about myself, specifically, my values, interests, personality, and skills (navigating your career journey moreau fye 4). this process required experimentation and a fundamental understanding that “myself” will change; however, once i was able to recognize aspects of my life that are important to me, i was able to recognize when i was living for someone else than myself and indulge in activities that bring me personal fulfillment, such as art, running, and reading. indulging in these activities makes me more personable and interesting to those that compliment my personality. inadvertently, this is how i met many of my life-long friends. understanding myself also allows me to strengthen my relationship with myself as i was then able to better respect myself my boundaries, time, and desires. this respect required a level of intentionality and mindfulness that was also developed. the thoughtfulness in which i lived my life allowed me to be grateful for my blessings and the present moment (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). my academic study of philosophy at notre dame facilitated this mindset as it pronounced the fact that the past and future are not in anyone’s locus of control, let alone my own. it is important to disclaim, however, that i actively prevent myself from falling into an absurdist philosophy. while many absurdist structures exist in society, i continue to seek meaning in everyday actions. this intentionality guided how i spent most of my time, as i was able to quickly recognize unhealthy habits and patterns that were unproductive or destructive. the way i defined productivity and a life well-lived was not guided by capitalism or any other social construct, but by my inner emotional fulfillment (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). integration 3 machado 1 francisco machado memento mori was a man of virtue who lived his life to the fullest by trusting in god, loving his family, and being a beacon of light to those who are in darkness. what he loved most in life was his faith and the people he met along the journey. he was constantly discerning god’s will for himself. in his journal entries he wrote this in big bold letters “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” 1 taking this to heart, he learned so much about the world and his love for knowledge to pursue the truth was unquestionable. learning from a young age about his faith, he began to love god at an early age. in highschool, his love for god grew even deeper, and his heart was changed by the words of the gospel. like many people he had many inspirations in his life including those who helped him to mature into a man. his love of god and community led him to notre dame where he worked so diligently to attend. when watching the movie about fr. ted hesburgh, he began to cry tears of joy with how beautiful a life could really be and how someone could live up to their fullest potential. one line that stuck with him was: "whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living." 2 frankie wanted to be a blessing to everyone and anyone he met, because of the people who were integral to his own life. the end was always in mind for him and he never feared death for he longed for the 2 hesburgh https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9, jerry barca and christine o'malley week 2 1why we need to slow down our lives https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/145953. pico iyer (week 1) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/145953 https://ideas.ted.com/author/pico-iyer/ machado 2 day he would meet that which he loved the most which was god. “many of us live our lives as if our lives were a star in a motion picture movie in which we have the lead role and everyone else plays a supporting role.” 3 death motivated him to not waste a single moment of his life. he wanted to be the best version of himself that he could be to prepare himself to be in the full presence of god one day. he often struggled to love those around him to the fullest capacity for he was not perfect. he recognized his sinfulness and did the best he could to conform his life to the law of god. in college he struggled to find that which made him the most happy. coming into notre dame with the intention to become a doctor he switched to engineering after his first semester. however, he was not satisfied with that either, for he knew that there were deeper questions he needed to ask himself about what he wanted to do with his life. for him discernment was a journey that was winding and never ending. “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” 4 he discerned both priesthood and marriage with an open mind to the joys and struggles of both. but he knew that loved being around those who shared the same love of god that he did. so he found his closest friends at notre dame that truly wanted the best for him and loved him for who he was. he questioned everything all the time in a prudent manner, but in particular he thought about what he most valued and desired in life? and why?5 he learned to find that which he was good at and that which he needed improvement upon. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more 5 "week five discernment conversation activity" https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/ edit?usp=sharing moreau week 5. 4 "navigating your career journey” https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ (meruelo family center for career development week 4. 3 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html ruth graham, ny times, week 3 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html machado 3 self-insight than when we started.” 6 he spent many hours praying for those in need, for those whom he loved, and took this call to vocation very seriously. what he hoped was that he could be a light to someone else so that they might know where his joy came from. he wanted to love everybody no matter who they were or where they came from. he took christ’s message of love seriously and began to spread it in small ways by his actions and mannerisms. for without love, nothing else matters and with love the world could be seen through a new perspective. throughout his life worked not for monetary gain or pleasure but he attempted to deny himself always and pick up his cross to follow christ. for what more is there to life than this? enduring the pain of suffering forged him into the man he was meant to become. he realized that the world’s conception of what a man is was not what true manhood looked like and he embraced his manhood for in christ he found the example of a perfect man. reading, studying, and learning were his strong suits and being generous was always the thing he longed to do the most. by the end of his life, he was happy for how far he had come and how much he had seen and done. he believed that he had seen everything there was to offer in life and he loved god so much more for what he had seen. for what is more beautiful than this kind of life? pope francis once said, “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you” 7 and frankie took these words to heart. life is the culmination of god’s love for us and when we begin to realize how much he does for our sake, how can we repay him. to be a servant to those always was frankie’s mission that he always strived for and though he was not perfect, he lived an honorable and happy life. to become holy is to live life in this manner and to have lived a 7 “ “why the only future worth building includes everyone” https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences week 7) 6 the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ (tasha eurich, ted conferences week 6) https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ machado 4 good life is all that mattered to frankie. life is a journey and the road to perfection is narrow, but the way we live matters and all that we have is each other to lean on. moreau integration three professor espeseth moreau integration three march 4th, 2022 a life well-lived: no universal definition decerning the definition of a life well-lived is among the most difficult inquiries of any college student. however, here at notre dame, i have slowly and carefully begun to piece together my understanding of a “life well-lived”. similar to many other aspects of life, i believe that the definition of a life well-lived is dynamic, changing, and refining with every state of life. currently, i have deducted that a life well-lived stems from self-care, meaningful relationships, and self-reflection. since coming to college, i have found myself to be incredibly busy. i find it difficult to balance the coursework of my classes, participation in extracurricular activities, and career discernment. i often find myself overwhelmed by feelings of anxiety and an underlying sense of obligation to constantly be doing work or studying. as driven, involved students, i believe that many notre dame students can attest to these feelings of anxiety and worry. as a result, many students prioritize work at the expense of rest. we feel as if we must constantly be doing work or stimulating our brains in some way in order to be “productive” or to prevent boredom. however, i have found through personal experience that rest is necessary for the completion of quality work. in his article, why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer effectively articulates the fundamental need for breaks. lyer states, says “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer – moreau fye week one). i believe that many students, including myself, have a misunderstanding of the https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ meaning of productivity in the context of our own lives. it can be far more productive to rest or simply be still rather than seeking constant mental stimulation. in other words, prioritizing rest can lead to more productive times of non-rest. i believe that incorporating breaks and prioritizing rest is the first step to a life well-lived. the phrase “a life well-lived” is often deceiving because some people are led to believe that a well-lived life is one without pain or hardship. however, i believe that some degree of suffering is necessary for growth when living a meaningful life. in the movie hesburgh, father hesburgh says “in my faith, you learn there is meaning in suffering. but to truly understand that you must suffer yourself” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley — moreau fye week two). on the surface, suffering appears to be contradictory to a well-lived life, but in reality, suffering often brings about meaning and fulfillment. however, it is difficult to distinguish what degree of suffering constitutes a life well-lived. as jihoon kim asks, “if god is good, why does he allow suffering to my life?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau week six). i believe that there is some human suffering that is extremely difficult to justify as being part of god’s larger plan. however, not all suffering is in opposition to a life well-lived. the concept of death is difficult to come to terms with. for most people, it takes years of reflection and contemplation to accept the inevitability of death. oftentimes, people struggle with the concept of death for a significant portion of their lives. in an article, sister alethia argues that in remembering death, we bring more meaning into our lives (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth gram – moreau fye week three). while the concept of death is somewhat morbid, coming to terms with the brevity of life allows us to discern what we wish to take away from our brief time on earth, leading to a more meaningful and fulfilling life. http://hesburgh https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html a major source of stress for college students including myself is the career discernment process. over the past few months, i have observed myself feeling reluctant and unmotivated to get involved in this process. i have felt overwhelmed by classes and adjusting to life in college, making it difficult for me to put extra energy into discerning a career path. however, when i put off this discernment process, i find that it just brings me more anxiety. as i explored notre dame’s undergraduate career services website, i felt motivated to take ownership of my career discernment process and utilize the tools that are available at my disposal (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week four). however, i began to realize that a live well-lived is not contingent upon one’s choice of career. i believe that in choosing our careers, we are given the opportunity to engage in a career that will bring meaning and fulfillment to our lives. however, one’s chosen career path is not the sole instrument of meaning. there are many other aspects of one’s life and identity that have the capability to generate meaning and ultimately lead to a life of happiness and fulfillment. i have found that speaking to those who know me well is a powerful tool of self-reflection and has aided my career discernment process. for moreau week five, i was prompted to engage in a conversation with a close friend or family member concerning my values, strengths, and vocation (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five). i chose to speak with my mother because she knows me well and is able to identify my core values. we concluded that my greatest desire in life is to engage in meaningful relationships. i deeply value family, friendships, and human interaction in general. growing up in a family of seven children, i have learned to appreciate those around me. in his ted talk, pope francis claims that many people are under the impression that a happy future is impossible to achieve (“why the only future worth building includes https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript everyone” by ted conferences and pope francis – moreau fye week seven). however, i have faith that a future of happiness is obtainable. i believe that our life experiences shape what we can envision for the future and i acknowledge that my optimism regarding my future is likely a result of my upbringing and privilege. over the past eight weeks, i have questioned my vocation more than ever before. i have found that a life well-lived is more than just a career choice. the quality of one’s relationships is critical in creating a life well-lived. however, there is no universal truth that outlines a life well-lived. for me, a life well-lived is enabled through self-care, reflection, and meaningful relationships. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript miller 1 professor pruitt fye 10102 04 march 2022 defining a life well-lived: introspection, passion, and selflessness introspection is crucial to leading a fulfilling life. being in tune with our own thoughts and feelings allows us to gain self-awareness and learn from the experiences that we have; this self-reflection enables us to recognize our strengths as well as opportunities for improvement. taking time to look inside ourselves after entering a new environment is especially valuable. for this reason, i found the “pause for reflection” questions during the first week of moreau fye this semester to be a meaningful activity (“pause for reflection” by the mcdonald center for wellbeing – moreau fye week one). i was able to take some time to analyze my first semester of college, a time filled with drastic changes and new challenges; i noticed that going forward, i want to manage my time better, but overall, i was proud of myself for branching out and stepping into different activities to meet new people. questions like the ones in this activity— questions that force us to intimately consider our overall feelings, successes, and regrets—can be applied to any situation that we face in life. developing a habit of looking back on our experiences and how we grew and changed from them, as well as what we would change about them, is a necessary component of a life well-lived, as this introspection brings us into closer contact with ourselves, the sources of joy in our lives, and our goals moving forward. while we discussed some of the drawbacks of introspection this semester (e.g., ruminating on the why when the what can often give us a more practical answer), self-reflection serves a positive file:///c:/users/21_bm/downloads/pause%20for%20reflection%20activity%20_%20guide%20(mfye%20spring%202021)%20(1).pdf miller 2 purpose if we are not quick to jump to negative conclusions about ourselves (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). honestly considering a situation in our lives, how we felt about it, and how it changed us is a simple practice that, if continued throughout life, can bring us to a better understanding of ourselves and a deeper appreciation for what gives our lives meaning. deep self-reflection can lead us to identifying what we are passionate about, and i think that digging deep into our passions is another key part to a life well-lived. one of the activities from this semester that focused on career guidance asked a question that hit the mark on what “passion” looks like—it is something we are doing when we lose track of time (“7 clues to help you get started with the career development process” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). finding something that we are genuinely excited about is challenging but extremely rewarding. continuing this passion throughout life, whether it be social work, medicine, sports, or any other avenue that brings us joy, is one way that we can find true satisfaction. my conversation with my mother during week 5 moved me closer to recognizing where my passions lie in terms of a potential career (“discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five). regardless of what specific path i take, i know it must be one where i am engaged in something that i genuinely look forward to every day, as developing that discovered passion is needed to make a life well-lived. our passions are often grounded in what excites and drives us, but it is important to remember that a life well-lived means reaching beyond ourselves. it means taking advantage of every opportunity to connect with other people and use our gifts and talents for good. this notion of channeling what we are good at and what makes us happy into a positive impact on our community forms the basis of father michael himes’ “three key questions” to discern a https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit miller 3 vocation (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). specifically, the third question calls us to consider how we can respond to the needs of our community. in this way, this question grounds the search for our own vocation in other peoples’ needs and reminds us that we should strive to use what we have to benefit others in any way that we can. by holding to this philosophy of care for our neighbor, we can look back at our lives knowing that we were consistently oriented towards doing what we could to help other people. conversely, if we are only focused on ourselves and our own success, we miss the bigger picture. pope francis’ speech, “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (moreau fye week seven) speaks to the value of recognizing that we are all part of a global community and must respect and care for one another. pope francis’ emphasis on unity and protection of the disadvantaged serves as a critical reminder of the obligation that each person has to contribute to the well-being of their community. i think that a life well-lived is defined by this constant search for how we can help our neighbor and leave our own personal bubble behind to positively impact other people. father hesburgh is a prime example of a person who translated his passions into real, lasting change. passionate about equality for all people regardless of their race, father hesburgh was involved in the civil rights movement throughout his life (“hesburgh” film produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). his life demonstrates that when we feel strongly about something, we cannot hesitate to act—a life well-lived is not spent sitting passively by and waiting for someone else to take initiative. furthermore, father hesburgh’s involvement in the civil rights commission demonstrates the value of continued commitment to a cause—seeing something through and having the stamina to withstand difficulties is equally as important as that initial excitement and motivation to get involved. it was mentioned in the https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 miller 4 “hesburgh” film that when it came to matters concerning civil rights, father hesburgh would always be around the corner to say, “you’re not doing enough.” hesburgh stretched himself to take on different projects and make change where he could. to me, this willingness to take on new endeavors in the name of a cause greater than oneself (like equality for all in father hesburgh’s case) is a central characteristic of a life well-lived. victoria gordon-brown moreau capstone integration my mission, should i choose to accept. my mission is to spread joy. i am happiest when others are happy because of something i have done or said. in spreading joy to others, i can inspire others to spread joy too. even something as simple as holding a door open for a stranger could encourage them to do the same for someone else. in a collective in which everyone is spreading joy, we build each other up and form strong, sustainable communities. i’m at my best when i have people around me for whom i have reciprocated love. i’m at my worst when i’m thinking only of myself. by surrounding myself with people for whom i care deeply, it becomes easier to remind myself to reflect on whether i’m looking out for others enough. for example, when i’m with my friends and one mentions that they have lots of work, i make an effort to check up on them and provide them with support. i want to be someone who consistently makes people’s lives better. i hope that in bettering myself in my personal life, career, and other endeavors, i can inspire others to do the same; this can be as simple as asking myself what i’ve done to make someone else’s day better. my greatest talents are my ability to communicate with others and my deep, sincere love of it. connecting with others brings me the greatest sense of fulfillment. this is because i believe the most important things in life are people. someday i want to reflect and feel satisfied that i have made a positive impact and given more than i have taken by forming meaningful connections through sharing emotions and experiences. so how will this animate my life for the next three years? firstly, i will make sure to make time for reflection and recovery. gandhi’s comment: “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour...i’ll have to meditate for two,” as outlined by pico iyer1 is very important, especially for college students. moving from one class to the next, then one extra-curricular to the next, looking after ourselves can sometimes be difficult. so i will try not push myself too much when i’m tired, but instead take a nap or meditate. this means that when i do essential tasks, i’ll focus and do them at a higher quality rather than struggling through them with my eyes half closed. over the next three years, i will use inspirational figures to encourage me to create a better world. for example, qing zhu, one of the 2021 domer dozen honorees, who works with ‘leading chinese companies and government departments on solutions to urgent global issues such as biodiversity protection and climate change.’2 qing shows that, with good ideas, passion and commitment to a project, it is possible to make recognisable impacts. in a similar way, i hope to be impactful by working with the nd community, especially those in positions of 1 (moreau fye week 1: why we need to slow down our lives; pico iyer) 2 (moreau fye week 2: the notre dame alumni association’s “domer dozen.”) victoria gordon-brown moreau capstone integration responsibility, to spread information and resources about sexual health, consent and bodily autonomy. in doing so, i hope our community will be more empowered to make safer, more responsible decisions. over the next three years, i want to find my own joy in college by not getting unnecessarily stressed. as sister aletheia said: ‘suffering and death are facts of life.’3 without being reminded of this indisputable fact– we are all going to die – it’s easy to focus on small things. getting tied up in tiny details leads to negativity, when instead we should acknowledge frustration, then move on. without this acknowledgement, we would lose sight of the bigger picture: the things that we genuinely find important. inspired by this message, i will make the most of my time here and do things that will bring me joy, like speaking italian. at nd, i appreciate the flexibility that i have given myself when it comes to choosing study and career paths. like in the ‘navigating your career journey’4 page, reflecting upon the things i enjoy, the skills i have, and my values led me to biochemistry and italian. because of this, i am studying abroad in italy this summer. however, i will continue to reflect to ensure that my career path remains in alignment with my values, goals and the things that bring me joy. as recognized by my brother,5 i value happiness through connections. he said that i value ‘the people i connect with, staying active and healthy and caring for others.’ at nd, i will dedicate my time to these to ensure i have the best college experience possible. i will maintain current relationships, build new ones, continue rowing, and stay active in supporting the causes i believe in. for example, this past semester, i handed out free condoms on earth day to promote environmental awareness and sexual health; i hope to plan a larger event to share information with more people. throughout my time at nd, i will embrace obstacles as opportunities for learning and growth. i will do this by facing difficult situations with a positive attitude. in a grotto network video, a man talks about his snowboarding accident and the struggles he faced as a result. ‘i was always so focused on what i could not do.’6 later, he talked about how he was inspired by his love of god to make the most of what he could do, rather than focusing on what he’d lost and what he couldn’t do. this highlights the impact that a positive mindset can have on someone’s outlook: he went from suicidal to enjoying life and helping others enjoy theirs. i hope to do the same for my friends by leading by example on how to deal with stress. over the next three years, i want to appreciate the people that support me. as the pope said: ‘life flows through our relations with others.’7 it’s important to remind ourselves of this. sometimes, when i’m tired and struggling, i underappreciate those who look out for me and 3 (moreau fye week 3: the nyt: meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die) 4 (moreau fye week 4: undergraduate careers: navigating your career journey) 5 (moreau fye week 5: week 5 discernment conversation activity; conversation with my brother) 6 (moreau fye week 6: grotto network: why does god allow suffering) 7 (moreau fye week 7: why the only future worth building includes everyone; his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) victoria gordon-brown moreau capstone integration whose interactions i rely on for joy and purpose; by valuing those i care about, i can build them up and make them feel valued. another way i will care for others is by accompanying them through their college struggles. as steve reifenberg said: ‘the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them.’8 by empathizing and making others’ struggles my own, i can better connect with and support them. for example, helping a friend study for a test or staying in with someone who doesn’t feel like going out. moreover, i will continue to improve the way i act to ensure i am welcoming to others, so they feel completely accepted. it is my and everyone’s duty to make people feel accepted, so they have a safe environment to work towards their own goals. by accepting people, it’s possible to build productive communities by reducing negative interactions. for example, there are many ‘religious iconography that depicts god, adam and eve, and other key figures as white.’9 our society’s prioritisation of whiteness is hostile towards people of colour. by accommodating all people, regardless of their race or gender etc, i can make sure that, even if they are facing negative treatment elsewhere, i can be a safe space for them to feel seen and appreciated. over the next three years i hope to grow in wisdom. in ‘seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments,’10 i won’t avoid different views, but instead engage in discussions to learn from them. this pushes me to be open minded and reconsider perspectives that i may have previously dismissed. from this, i can develop a well-rounded perspective. for example, i will try to engage with the ‘right to life’ club and consider why it is they believe what they do, so as not to blindly disagree. to ensure i carry out my mission, i will look for ways to actively help out. as dean cole said: ‘each one of us can choose to finally end hate.’11 in following my mission of spreading joy, i am choosing to end hate by removing myself as a sponsor of the problem. instead, i will be a cultivator of positivity, and as my favorite saying says, i will ‘make my bubble of the world a better place.’12 8 (moreau fye week 9: teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together; professor steve reifenberg) 9 (moreau fye week 10: why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism; dr robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost) 10 (moreau fye week 11: how to avoid an echo chamber; dr paul blaschko) 11 (moreau fye week 12: dean g. marcus cole: i am george floyd...) 12 suzanne gordon-brown, aka my mum moreau integration 3 donovan michael urbaniak moreau semester 2 4 march 2022 no painless lessons andrew donovan found the utmost beauty in imperfections. after he left his position as head developer at blizzard entertainment, mr. donovan became infatuated with the japanese art of kintsugi. kintsugi is the art of gold joinery, a method of repairing pottery by joining broken pieces together with lacquer mixed with gold dust. this method arose from the idea that imperfections could and should be highlighted and respected. the breaking of the ceramic is the requirement for this beautiful craft to begin. breaks and cracks give birth to glistening beauty if treated with care and given time. he carried this perspective with him all of his life. it helped him to stay grounded and roll with the punches so to speak. he took pride in growing over every obstacle he encountered. he was strong for the people he kept closest rather than himself. he had people to fight for so he always had a reason to keep his head above water. he truly believed that “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico pyer moreau semester 2 week 1). he matched met and toppled his challenges through his ability to take on the proper perspective for any situation. andrew held the belief that strength for its own sake can help bring a person peace and confidence but using strength for the benefit of others was where joy came from. he was once told to “take care of your mother while she is still alive and be yourself” (theodore hesburgh moreau semester 2 week 2). such simple commands guided his entire life. he had always believed that filial piety was the basis for a good upbringing and was a sign of a virtuous person, but it was not until he became a father himself that he saw how important it was to reciprocate the love his parents gave to him and his siblings. though his parents remained active and lucid until their passing, andrew and his siblings made sure that they had no worries in their golden years. they were large parts of all of their grandchildren's lives, and andrew was incredibly grateful for that. his parents' resilience and endless love were key inspirations for his own way of life. though he lived in the light and on the right side of the law, andrew was never one to shy away from the darker side of life. death, hopelessness, unfairness, and absurdity were things he chose to face head on. in his eyes, ignoring negative things was a surefire way to also lose sight of what is truly positive in one’s life. he knew that “it’s in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them”(sister theresa aletheia noble moreau semester 2 week 3). if the most dark and absurd of all of life’s truth, the fact that every living thing is marching towards death from the day of its birth, contains light, andrew questioned, then how much positivity must the pure and beautiful things in life contain. it was through this mentality that andrew was able to make peace with death and other frightening things. their existence defines that which is good in the world. andrew found pleasure in many things in his life, but one facet of life that drove andrew ever onward was the prospect of discovering new things around every corner. when asked the question ,“what is something you are doing when you lose track of time,”(“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center moreau semester 2 week 4) andrew would always answer, “diving into something i know nothing about.” intellectual curiosity and a willingness to try new things whenever possible made the world incredibly exciting to andrew. he traveled to countless countries, becoming fluent in japanese and korean, and making new friends wherever he went. his curiosity also spread into the realms of the arts. he was an avid music listener and musician, delving into obscure musical rabbit holes or practicing the myriad of instruments he taught himself to play for hours every week. his intellectual curiosity truly bloomed at the university of notre dame where he was able to pair his academic interests with meaningful social justice endeavors. it was there that he discovered that learning is not just for the betterment of oneself but is also a way to prepare oneself for a life of serving others. the more he learned about a wide range of things, the better equipped he was to help in a wide variety of situations. andrew did not view his life’s vocation as a concrete thing. he certainly knew that starting and raising a family would be a part of it, but with so many interests, he had plenty of career directions that would have brought him contentment. while discerning his career path, his brother michael emphasized his ability to grasp things quickly and get along with a wide variety of people (discernment conversation moreau semester 2 week 5 ). ultimately, he pursued the field of software development due to its multidisciplinary nature and a widespread need for it. he used his skills first as a loyal employee, then as a fair and grounded leader. he worked in the social justice field, the cybersecurity sector, and even the entertainment industry. in all of these varied jobs, he made sure that he maintained professional and personal integrity. he made sure that the working environment he was a part of or was creating promoted the wellness of all of those it touched. aiming to produce the most good possible was always a top priority. while it can almost certainly be said that andrew donovan lived a “good life,” his life was not without struggles. struggling for a large portion of his life with mental health issues, andrew was constantly working on new methods of dealing with his emotions and processing neurological responses which he could not control. in his youth, he used a three person chess board with pieces representing different elements of his psyche and the different sides of the hexagonal board representing different modes of being. things like this made it evident that introspection and self-reflection were deeply ingrained processes that formed his character. while such complex mental processing exercises helped him to discover much about himself and process challenging ideas from a young age, incredible focus inward can “surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha euric moreau semester 2 week 6). andrew was always seeking an equilibrium between letting his mind run free and potentially out of control and keeping his whirlwind thinking contained and potentially bottling up his consciousness to the point of explosion. luckily for him, he did not have to take on this challenge alone. all of his life, andrew was surrounded by caring friends and his ever-present, infinitely loving family. as a young teen, he could be argumentative and judgmental. he was once told that, “bridging the gulf of mutual judgment and replacing it with kinship is tricky indeed,” (tattoos on the heart by gregory boyle moreau semester 2 week 7) but it was also incredibly rewarding. he amassed a large network of companions of all backgrounds and beliefs through his acceptance and willingness to give his time and effort. these people made every day of his life better. in closing, andrew donovan’s approach to life was captured by the philosopher jean-paul sartre: “man is not the sum of what he has already, but rather the sum of what he does not yet have, of what he could have.” andrew always strove for more. he did not do this out of dissatisfaction with what he had. he did this because he knew there was always more out in the world to learn, fall in love with, or share with others. final integration, clingan plan to pursue my potential i cannot believe my first year as a notre dame student is already drawing to a close. in highschool, i never even imagined making it to notre dame and yet now here i amalready a fourth of the way done with my journey. my first year at notre dame has been a ride i will always remember. both with its challenges and its highlights, i can confidently say that being a freshman has made me grow in profound ways. i think a big reason behind this personal growth has been this moreau class, so i want to say a special thanks to you. with our running list of community norms that we identified at the start of the semester, you made everyone including myself feel welcomed and pushed us all to contribute to class conversations. in the many discussions we’ve had over the semester, i have developed a clearer understanding about what i want my personal mission statement to be and how i will go about pursuing it. to begin with, when i think about pursuing a life well-lived, what immediately comes to mind is how i can act to achieve my greatest potential. as each of our classes started with a thoughtful prayer, i have come to realize how important staying grounded in faith is. god has a plan for me. therefore, i should not worry about the things in this world that i cannot control like my orgo exams or the grades i received in writing and rhetoric that i wish could have been better. by having faith in god, i know that everything will work out in the end, and this has helped me control my stress. being in flaherty, i have been very thankful for our sunday night masses that allow me to continually reconnect with god after a long week. the time i spend in mass gives me a space to slow down my mind. previously i never realized just how important it is for us to pause in the middle of our day. however, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means” (why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer, moreau fye w1). this year i often struggled with an overwhelming workload and let stress get the best of me. i kept pushing myself and didn’t give myself a break. however, i still remember the conversation i had with my mom when she recommended that i start to journal for 10 minutes in the middle of my day to de-stress. since then, i have started to journal whether it be in between classes or sitting outside on library quad. the time i spend journaling has helped me develop a reflective attitude and see life differently. thus, i believe that part of attaining a life well-lived requires finding time to pause and finding the little things in daily life that make me happy and grateful. when thinking about a life well-lived, i have found it incredibly helpful to ponder the question posed by fr. michael, “is this a source of joy?” (three key questions, fr. michael himes, moreau fye w3). thinking about this question has helped me discover what i am most passionate about and what will fill my life with meaning. to me, i pursue a life well-lived by giving back to others, and i have noticed that i’m most happy when i surround myself with others who share my values. when exploring week 4’s navigating your career journey, i found that potential career paths that will leave me most fulfilled are rooted in the medical professions (navigating your career journey, center for career development, moreau fye w4). i’ve seen this passion reflected in my love for the compassionate care in medicine club. each week, i look forward to attending club meetings and hearing from the guest speakers who share their https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ stories helping the sick. i can see my life being animated in the coming three years by continuing my involvement in this club, promoting the amazing work that it does, and potentially being a club leader and organizer. in the discernment conversation i had with my grandpa during week 5 of this semester, i was overwhelmed by the difficult questions about what i want to do with my life. however, my grandpa helped me see in myself the empathy i have for others and solidified my understanding about what i am most interested in. i still remember him telling me, “to not take life too seriously” because he always wants to encourage me to have new experiences and seize the day no matter what it brings (discernment conversation activity, moreau fye w5). this is the type of attitude i want to bring with me for the rest of my time at nd. i plan to not get too worked up about school, because that way i will still have room to be there for others. during my first year at notre dame, i have tried to pursue a life well-lived through the relationships i have formed. the people around us and the connections we form are essential to a good life. my mission in life is to grow in solidarity with others and strengthen communities in a world that seems to be increasingly divided. fr. hesburgh is a symbol for how i wish to relate with others. in the midst of conflict and controversy, he once spoke, “i got both nation’s delegates to attend even though they weren’t catholic. but i sat them next to each other, and for one hour a week, they were in the same roomtalking” (hesburgh, jerry barca, moreau fye w2). fr. hesburgh shows us that it is important for us to have hard conversations with those we may disagree with because it is through these conversations that we can be reconciled with one another. therefore, i too hope to continue to encounter those with varying opinions because that is how i can learn new perspectives. additionally, in my pursuit of a life well-lived, i challenge myself to “go beyond the social bubbles” that only seem to reinforce what i already believe. for instance, i have learned to recognize the danger that “echo chambers lock us into a particular worldview” (how to avoid an echo chamber, dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye w11). so, part of pursuing a good life for me involves continually seeking new knowledge. over the course of this first year, sometimes i felt like i didn’t know enough about current events and the realities other people were facing across the globe. however, i have started to prioritize becoming a more informed citizen by listening to podcasts and making it a goal of mine to read the nd observer to hear more about what current students are experiencing. this will animate my life over my remaining 3 years at nd by encouraging me to stay educated. my goal in this life is also to be more inclusive to those on the margins. as fr. greg boyle writes, “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (tattoos on the heart, fr. boyle, moreau fye w7). i believe i am called to walk together with those who are marginalized and that first can start by getting to understand the lived experiences of those who suffer. part of my mission is rooted in serving my community. at notre dame, by being involved in foodrescue nd and delivering excess food to homeless shelters, i have seen firsthand the impact we can make in this world when we reach out to those beyond our “jurisdiction.” pursuing a life well-lived also is rooted in how i respond to challenges and confront suffering. as we discussed in class, it is important that we reframe our “why” questions to “what” questions because “asking what could keep us open to discovering new https://www.lifelongfaith.com/uploads/5/1/6/4/5164069/practice_of_discernment_-_learning_program.pdf https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/167944 information about ourselves” (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, moreau fye w6). when we think in terms of why, we often form limiting beliefs and see things negatively; however, when we ask what instead, we allow ourselves to accept the thoughts and emotions that we are feeling and move forward. part of my mission is to view every new day as an opportunity to become better and not dwell on the past, whether that be failures or suffering. already this semester, i have had to do this in many of my difficult classes. in orgo specifically, after receiving an exam score i wasn’t proud of, i worked to see how i might do better on the next one instead of getting upset over a test that was already behind me. in addition, i want to mention the words of dean marcus cole that have inspired me throughout my time here. he wrote in the midst of police brutality against black lives, “i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something” (i am george floyd, g. marcus cole, moreau fye w12). these words are powerful. they touch on how we are all connected and equal, but they also speak to what it means to stand up for what is right. we each must do something when we see oppression or hate. that is why i made an effort to do greendot training and learn to take an active role when i witness problems in my own community. in the next 3 years, i plan to be equipped to stick up for others with bravery. in life, i seek to comfort those around me and be supportive. it is important to remember that “we are all connected, tied, and bound together” (teaching accompaniment, prof. steve reifenberg, moreau fye w9) and thus it is through this that i hope to always be there for others. i have found support in many mcwell services on campus when i needed someone to talk to, so i hope i can also be there to accompany others at their times of need as well. i actively pursue a life well-lived everyday by being open to people’s differences and promoting diversity and inclusion. notre dame writes in its own mission statement, “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality” (spirit of inclusion at notre dame, nd mission statement moreau fye w10). as i have met so many new people during my time here, i have formed friendships with so many people from different religious and racial backgrounds. yet these differences shouldn’t really matter. i treat others as i would want to be treated. lastly, i think the previous integration to “write our own eulogy” was very impactful. as i was forced to reflect on the course of my life so far, i had to wrestle with what kind of mark i wanted to leave on this world and how i wanted to be remembered. i recall writing a lot about the types of relationships i wanted to form because i believe an essential component to pursuing a life well-lived is surrounding yourself with people who you love and who lift you up to be a better person (integration threedefining a life well-lived, moreau fye w8). with that said, i want to continue to get to know the people in my classes and make more of an effort next year to be more outgoing. additionally, when writing my personal mission statement during week 13, i recall writing that part of my life’s mission is to be more grateful and appreciative to my parents who have done so much for me (“finding purpose when you’re feeling lost” khang tran, moreau fye w14). as the year is coming to an end and i will be home soon, i think it marks a perfect time to do something nice for my family to show them just how much i love each and https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://thedreamdean.com/2014/04/11/a-life-well-lived/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/career-and-finance/how-to-focus-on-what-matters/ every one of them. without them i wouldn’t be where i stand today. when all is said and done, i strive to live my life inspired by faith, grounded in love, and remembering hope for each day moving forward. gonyea capstone integration gonyea 1 erik oswald fys 10102 64 29 april 2022 achieving my mission: a worthwhile journey as my first year of college comes to a close, i have begun to reflect on the impacts each new aspect and experience has had on my life. moreau, being something i have experienced throughout not just one semester, but both, has certainly given me lots to reflect on. moreau has taught me about my values, ways i can live a better life, and much more. most importantly, moreau class has given me the opportunity to generate and grow my own beliefs, wants, and needs. in fact, i have developed my own mission statement using this quote from the notre dame mission statement as inspiration, “[t]he university prides itself on being an environment of teaching and learning that fosters the development in its students of those disciplined habits of mind, body, and spirit that characterize educated, skilled, and free human beings” (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fys week 13): my mission in this life is to not only concern myself with the groups i identify with, but to support and fight for those groups which i do not. i aim to show my beliefs through my actions. rather than following in another’s lead, i will tread my own path, acting for myself, rather than others. this being said, my actions will reflect my values, not the benefits i selfishly wish to receive from them. i will put others before myself, but will also prioritize self-care, being aware of when i need to internally check-in with my own body, mind, and spirit. i will build relationships with others for genuine reasons, surrounding myself with people i deeply trust and adore. i will work to share my resources with others, making generosity a habit of mine. i will also become more comfortable with asking for help from others, as there is no shame in this. to live a https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ gonyea 2 well-lived life, i will follow the above guidelines, working to improve and implement them each and every day. the beginning part of my mission statement was inspired by dean g. marcus cole. in one of his articles, he states “[i]t is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed. to do so, i want to restore father hesburgh’s original vision for notre dame law school by taking three steps” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something’” by marcus cole moreau fys week 12). from this i reflected on the fact that previously in my life i really have not done enough to aid the restoration of human rights. as a white person, i am aware that i will never truly know what oppression or racism feel like, as dr. robin d’angelo discusses, but that is no excuse not to help prevent them for others (“why it’s so hard to talk about to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fys week 10). in my remaining three years at notre dame, i plan to join different cultural organizations as an ally. my roommate is very involved in the filipino club here, faso. i think this is a good place for me to begin my endeavors and support communities other than my own. by joining these organizations and clubs, i am also giving myself the opportunity to learn about different cultures and backgrounds, another way i can support other communities. adding on to what i have stated above, over the next three years i aim to use disagreement as an opportunity to understand a group or individual better. as is said in the hesburgh movie, “peace is important, that human life is important and sacred, that we have to learn to talk to each other” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 gonyea 3 moreau fys week 2). this quote has allowed me to aspire for the peace that is mentioned. in order to fulfill this aspiration, i will use tense conversations as an opportunity to improve my communication skills. for example, if i am in class and there is a controversial topic being discussed, rather than sitting silent to avoid tension, i plan to insert myself into the conversation. i will state my viewpoint as well as work to understand the perspectives of those around me. going off of this idea of peace, pope francis said that “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fys week 7). integrating this into my above goal, during these conversations, i will make sure everyone involved is given the opportunity to share their own perspective, this way, as a group, we can be as harmonious as possible. one last aspect i will integrate into these disagreements is the ability to draw from my own personal experiences. steve reifenberg said, “[d]rawing from personal experiences gives new meaning to the possibility of engaging in a complicated world – to help someone else discover and tell her own story, to walk together in the search of new, better paths forward, and to broaden the scope of our collective ambitions” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fys week 9). rather than conforming to others’ experiences and perspectives, i will speak from my heart, using my own beliefs and experiences to guide my contributions to these conversations. continuing with the theme of embracing discomfort, i have noticed over this past year at notre dame that i typically avoid conflict. i do not like facing the negative aspects of life, and instead ignore them. sister theresa aletheia noble, however, has inspired me to become comfortable with these darknesses. she stated that “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html gonyea 4 die” by ruth graham moreau fys week 3). over the next three years at notre dame, i want to make this a habit of mine. to do this, i am going to lean on my friends for support. i will use them for accountability, as they are the people who notice when i am avoiding a certain gloomy situation. i will also utilize my family, specifically my mom. for example, if i receive a less than ideal exam grade, i plan to call my mom and talk with her about it. this way, i am giving myself the opportunity to think through the situation, and therefore realize some light in it. for situations that are out of my control, such as a university outbreak of the flu, i will remember tasha eurich’s claim that asking why something happened causes a person to get stuck on an occurrence rather than healthily move on from it (“the right way to be introspective (yes,there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fys week 6). i will practice asking “what?” questions rather than “why?” questions. moving onto the self-care portion of my mission statement, i have a few ideas as to how i will achieve this goal. i have put an emphasis on it in my mission statement because this year there have been many times where i have not prioritized my own health, and nothing good came from those experiences. i tend to put school work before all else, even if that is not the healthiest option. in one conversation with my mom, she stressed how i have always been my own toughest critic (“conversation with mom, february 05, 2022, week 5”). due to this, i am always working to be better, even if it is at the price of my mental health. i want to improve my self-care habits by setting out chunks of time each week designated to relaxing downtime. over the next three years at notre dame, depending on my class schedule each semester, i will set aside at least five hours a week for self-care. during this time, i will put my work away and focus on myself, whether that be watching a show, going on a walk, or doing some other activity to help me destress. i was reminded of this need for a break by pico iyer when he said “[y]et it’s https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ gonyea 5 precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). the last habit i want to implement into my next three years at notre dame is trusting myself and doing what i feel is right, just like eitan hersh’s father does when he watches continuous political news channels (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fys week 11). this can be applied to many situations, such as when i eventually have to choose my career path. for this example, i must remember that a specific major does not equal a specific career path, as the meruelo family center for career development made me aware of, and that my future is in my own hands (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fys week 4). this practice is intertwined with all of the above habits i have discussed, since for all of them it is up to me whether i achieve them or not. i also must trust my own beliefs and values to lead a life i am passionate about and proud of. as i grow up, the importance of values have become more and more prominent. a person can be well defined by their values and beliefs. knowing this, as well as being prompted to by moreau class, i have reflected a lot on myself over this past year. i truly plan to implement all of the above practices into my life over the next three years, and then after, because i know they are a huge step towards achieving a life well-lived. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ integration 4 pursuing a life well-lived (mission statement moreau fye week 13) my mission in this world is to have a positive impact on those around me. personally, i want to live the best life that i can and live my life to its fullest potential. if i am capable of making somebody’s day, i am all for it because it makes the world a better place. everyone always asks, “how can you change the world,” but i do not believe that is a valid question. it is next to impossible to have a lasting impact on the entire world, which is why i want to set more realistic goals for myself and progressively increase what i do for the people around me. right now, i know i can positively impact my friends and family, but as i am about to take that next step in life, i believe i can begin helping the local community. “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (why we need to slow down our lives pico iyer moreau fye week 1) pico iyer implies that we should take a break from the internet to allow ourselves to take a step back and regather ourselves before we head back online. to be honest, this idea sounds great to me, but i know i would never be able to accomplish this. the use of the internet has been a huge factor in speeding up our lives. when i am bored, for example, i will either pass time by going on my phone or watching some television, and i know a large number of the population would say the same thing. passing time with the internet would have me regretting that decision because time flies by when i am encapsulated by the internet. i have not made any strides towards achieving this, unfortunately. “if i may be unkind to some person in what i say about them, it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (hesburgh film moreau fye week 2). what i take away from this is that we should be truthful, even when times are the hardest they have ever been. you cannot sit back and say you have lived an honest life when you are not truthful to those around you. it is true that judgment is an everyday thing. people in this world are constantly judging others, whether it is about somebody’s looks, character, personality, etc. the problem with this is that we will never be 100% truthful to them, refusing to acknowledge what that person may have gone through in their life. “[dissatisfaction] is what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!” (fr. michael himes moreau week 3). dissatisfaction is one thing that keeps us motivated to do better and improve ourselves. without this feeling and urge to be better, then we would have no reason to search for joys, talents, and newly acquired abilities. if we were constantly satisfied with the way we lived our lives, then what would we have to work for in life? this is why i try to better myself or do something productive every day. “i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed – maybe it was something a friend or family member wanted you to do a required course in high school” (navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). when i begin something, i want to know that it is something that i can do well and do it with love. one thing that i was always concerned with was how long my love would last in my career. i may start out loving what i do, and i may think it is what i will always want to do but that is not always the case. part of my time in swimming has had me questioning whether i love it or not. college has definitely made me love it even more. when something is part of your life for so long, i feel like sometimes you’re ready to move on, so i just hope i never get that feeling in my desired field. “i thought it was a really interesting conversation because it was really the first time we talked about what we think and respect each other. some things were scary accurate, which is unbelievable considering we have only known each other for a few months” (conversation activity moreau fye week 5). building lasting relationships is important to living a life well-lived. i cannot imagine life without those who i have become friends with. living in indiana has made me become family with a bunch of strangers, and i cannot thank it enough. creating these everlasting memories is key to life. we have grown to understand each other when we know one of us is down or doing really well on a particular day. it has become very easy to share my experiences and stories with those i have become friends with. “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships…” (the right way to be introspective tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) in my opinion, i feel like this study does make a lot of sense. whenever i am doubting myself or unsatisfied with what i’m doing, i find myself reflecting on my life a lot more. on the other hand, if i am completely happy with how things are going, i tend to lose track of time and feel disconnected from my emotions because i am focused on the actions that make me happy, which leads to more free-thinking. when life is tough, it often has me questioning every move i make, hoping it is the right one for me. “[hope] can do so much, because a tiny flicker of light that feeds on hope is enough to shatter the shield of darkness” (why the only future worth building includes everyone pope francis moreau fye week 7) this quote just stood out to me because of its tone and how powerful pope francis presents it. oftentimes, people lose relationships which leads to us feeling down and having lost hope for the ones we truly love. however, we are assured to always have hope, even in our darkest situations. pope francis reminds us that people and healthy relationships are what drive this world. one thing my mom always told me was to always check up on my friends, past and present because it is always important to have someone sticking by your side. i have had a few friends with who i shared some of my greatest memories, but had our friendship suddenly came to a stop. those were strange times, but i always ended up talking to them to see how they are doing. “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be their helper, they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning – to accompany them as well.” (teaching accompaniment professor steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9) steve reifenberg intended to improve the quality of life for orphans residing in chile. however, when disaster struck, the residents needed to take care of him. i think it is very important to not have any expectations of strangers and to go in with an open mind when meeting people. a poor environment, like the one in chile, leads to people needing to take care of each other. as we have previously talked about, caring for each other no matter who they are leads to everlasting relationships “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, etc. precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.” the spirit of inclusion at notre dame is critical to everyone who is involved at this university. nobody should be excluded from events or other things because of who they are. i abide by the golden rule and so should many others. if people do me no harm, then i will treat them with respect. yes, not everybody is going to be your friend, but it is vital for humanity to put those differences aside when it comes to treating others properly. “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their argument.” (how to avoid an echo chamber dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11) one thing that i have learned while growing up is that there are always two sides to a story and people with different opinions. hearing the many different opinions about certain topics is important for our understanding of communication. in order to communicate with each other, we need to fully understand the other side’s opinions and feelings. this is the only way to discuss things in a mature and proper manner because it allows us to understand the people we surround ourselves with. listening to what others have to say can help our minds grow by thinking in ways we may have never thought. “i know that those men will never have to answer for what they did to us. at least in this life” (dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). this quote really stood out to me because it states that they may have gotten away with the crime that day, but they may not be able to escape it on their day of judgment after they pass away. in simpler terms, cole simply puts their fate into god’s hands. yes, people are entitled to their religion, but if we all believed that there may be an afterlife—a place beyond our time on earth—then the world may be a much better place because our actions would have an impact on our future. in conclusion, treating yourself and those around you respectfully is what makes a life well-lived. building relationships with everyone will help us understand what we are going through individually and as a whole. integration 4 integration 4how do i pursue a life well-lived? moreau first year experience april 29, 2021 a life with purpose: impact, relationships and being present a life well-lived moves beyond being a “good person” or choosing to do the “right” thing in tough situations. a life well-lived requires intentionality and careful planning to cultivate a cohesive, impactful and kind set of values that inform an individual’s decision making. this life requires consistent values and an open mindset to integrate growth and new life experiences with those values. a life well-lived allows a person to be dependable and well understood in their community too because individuals actions and values impact the border community. choosing to live this intentional life is not easy, however the positive consequences far exceed any initial difficulties. my life well-lived does not begin after graduation, getting a first job or starting a family. it begins when i consciously decide to live it, and i need to ensure that i continue to value a life well-lived. death is inevitable and can happen unexpectedly. accepting this reality now is an important aspect of prioritizing my life well lived and the direct values i want to carry now instead of looking at more shallow pursuits. this certain uncertainty reframes the beauty of life and opportunity to live well today because i am only guaranteed the present. this idea, also known as memento mori, has been popularized by american nun sister theresa alethia. she first adopted this mindset after rediscovering catholicism in college (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). in keeping with her life well-live, sister alethia took the realization of this freedom to act on her values and began sharing memento mori on social media. her ability to find peace in death and share her important values with the world is my inspiration too. as a college student it is easy to discount the validity or impact of my contributions to the world or community. sister alethia teaches that accepting death as a catalyst to act in the present and sharing my values however different they may seem really can begin a life well lived. reflecting on death helps give an individual perspective on what is important to them and how they want to be remembered. right now certain assignments, internships or goals might seem important, but my funeral will not be about the tasks and roles that i held, but the person i was. my eulogy would detail how i lived my life. it would highlight my relationships with others, my gratitude, positive leadership and other traits i hope to have embodied (“integration 3” by and “integration three instructions_sp22” by moreau fye instructorsmoreau fye week 8) following a life well-lived is not a goal that is saved for “after” or something to reflect on at the end of my life. it is a daily habit, a set of core values that inform big decisions and mundane situations. an inspiring example of this daily commitment is former notre dame president fr. ted hesburgh. fr. hesburgh committed himself to community building and service to others as a child and entered the priesthood to ground those goals in his catholic faith. fr. hesburgh knew his values needed to be connected to action and continually placed these values ahead of other selfish interests. in the face of segregation and racism nationally, students' individual financial struggles or controversial speakers, fr. hesburgh just reviewed his values and acted accordingly (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uut1w2pxarvuuxsvldqiyyk40bril7wj/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 2). he was never intimidated by others' judgments or repercussions and allowed his goals and their connected values to lead him. goal setting and regular self-reflection help me connect my values to tangible action in my daily life. i also use this reflection to help me connect with others and ensure my life is positively impacting my community. a life well-lived revolves around constant connection and reconnection to values. many of which i detailed in the first half of my mission statement: “i am at my best when i am around others in positive relationships. in these relationships, i am able to support and be honest with others, and they can support and talk honestly with me. i push myself to create deep, meaningful relationships with substantive quality time and conversations. i also work to make a positive impact on the world, in my classes or professional jobs. i embrace humanity but making these genuine connections and respecting the community around me. i work to alleviate suffering by offering a listening ear, words of support. professionally and academically i create innovative solutions that recognize individuals and human experience, not broad, quick fixes” (“week 13 qqc” by moreau fye week 13). many of these values are important, but i must ensure i connect them to my actions. in order to make my positive impact professionally i must carefully research and discern different job opportunities and continually reassess my roles. i have begun this careful discernment by looking at the mission statements of companies in fields i am interested in. after finding these companies that fit my values and enact positive change, i will need to talk with real life employees to receive their first hand perspectives (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). they can tell me exactly how they are able to live out company values and the way their work is structured around both their skills and aspirations. at its core a life well-lived focuses on the dignity of each individual person. i hope to place common dignity as a core belief and guiding value in my life well-lived. connecting with a broad community of people means the inevitable interaction with individuals different from myself and hearing opinions i have never encountered or disagree with. the world is not uniform. embracing this diversity can help me foster inclusion and give my broader community the ability to learn from each other and accomplish more than if we were separated (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week 10). a life well-lived does not mean being a pushover or pushing others into one set of beliefs; a life well-lived can navigate diverse experiences and perspectives by bringing people together through common humanity. when i make new relationships a more accepting and open community can form and enact positive change. hostile relationships do not allow space for these important actions. jesuit priest and gang intervention leader, fr. gregory boyle creates his life well-lived by highlighting this common humanity between opposing gang members and the relationship between gang members and other parts of society(“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. gregory boyle moreau fye week 7). he is able to take this baseline equality and bring forward healthing relationships that directly improve individual lives and those in the community. i strive to follow fr. boyle’s example and be a force for connection and commonality. https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1g1jhjnaummkz1ezeb2fxhsem7e-lzlgqb02xepght5o/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008/download?download_frd=1 environment and community are also incredibly important to my life well-lived, but it can be easy to wind up feeling stuck in unhealthy friendships or isolating myself with the wrong groups if i am not careful. many weeks this semester focused on looking toward the people and things that comprise my environment as a way to assess my own behavior and steps toward future aspirations. it will be important that i rely on supportive, like-minded friends and family to help keep on the right path. an outside perspective can be a powerful avenue for identifying different shortcomings or toxic relationships that would pull me away from my life well-lived. the people around me are able to separate my emotions from my actions and can use their own resources and understanding of my environment to provide new insight (“week five discernment conversation activity document” by moreau fye instructors – moreau fye week 5). by talking with many different people in my support network i can also ensure i avoid trapping myself in an echo chamber or bubble of opinion that would isolate me from new ideas or hinder my ability to understand my community. avoiding isolating myself from differing opinions also requires a sound understanding of my beliefs, so that i can actively identify avenues for education on other perspectives (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko– moreau fye week 11). cultivating relationships can be the most powerful teaching experience because it allows us to see different opinions and introduces us to the variety of life experiences present in our broader community. today the reality of living in the united states is still very different for people of color, women, and the lgbtq population, but learning about these exercises and opening myself up to others can expand my understanding of our world (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i can bring different groups together by continually relying on a border network of relationships that brings a diversity of opinions together. this will better inform my goals and ensure that my actions benefit and support those around me. i can learn to strike a balance between giving and receiving from others in these new relationships as well because without mutual support and improvement these relationships do not work toward a life well-lived that supports others. i cannot go into relationships only expecting to receive support or expecting to fix others (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i must go in under the goal to make a new connection and allow the similarities and differences between myself and another person to structure our interactions. while much of this reflection has focused on expectations, goals and values to live my life well-lived, i also want to give myself the grace to enjoy all the opportunities presented to me and embrace the fun, spontaneous nature of life. above all, i want to feel fulfilled and surrounded by a loving, fun community of people. it is easy to feel that constantly working, setting goals and being productive might lead to more accomplishments but recreational time and relaxing are an equally important part of keeping myself mentally and physically happy and involved with others (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). it is important to set work and self improvement boundaries to let myself just be present in reality and thankful for the opportunities i have to be alive. if i am not present with myself and others, then i am not fully living (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). i am just constantly working for a future self, and i can never be thankful for where i am at and what i have accomplished. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 eulogy francesca maria lee sadly passed away a few days ago due to a conflict between her and her best friend, abby. francesca was an accounting major at the university of notre dame, although everyone knew her true desire was to never work a day in her life… and she never did. her life was cut short in its prime. she was only nineteen years old when her life came to an abrupt end. three weeks ago she and her friend abby interviewed each other for an assignment in their moreau first-year experience course. the interview included asking each other something that would be hard to hear (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). although the answer cannot be shared here because it has been redacted by both girls’ families, neither girl was happy to hear what was said. this interaction was only the beginning of the ongoing conflict between our hero, francesca, and her so-called best friend. the two continued to have small arguments about little things for the next two weeks. one night, the conflict became too much. the two girls, along with 2 of their friends, decided to settle the score once and for all in a battle to the death… in mario kart. they would play 32 races every single course available on mario kart wii and the winner of the whole thing would be the champion. things went south on the final race of the prix, “rainbow road.” they had been neck and neck up until for the first 31 races until they went into the 32nd race in a tie. francesca had a rough start at the beginning of her race due to her character’s size. toad is a small character so he tends to get knocked off the course a lot. abby, who plays as donkey kong, had no trouble running into others. abby was in first starting the third and final lap. as francesca desperately tried to catch up from her place in second, she received a blue shell. this was her chance. she threw the blue shell and it hit abby just before she crossed the finish line. francesca was able to finish the race in first place. this was the final straw for abby. the two began fighting. punches were being thrown and their friends tried to stop them, but it was no use. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit their fight continued as they made their way up to the fourth floor of farley hall, their dorm of residence. due to the extreme temperatures inside farley hall, a window was open in the hallway. the fight approached it and suddenly they fell through the window, breaking the screen and plunging to their deaths in the farley parking lot. may they, more so francesca, rest in peace. now that you know the circumstances of her death it is time for this eulogy to get into the highlights of her life. francesca was a bright young girl who greatly enjoyed her time on this earth. not everything about her life was all fine and dandy. although short, her life was incredibly busy and stressful. as stated in the article why we need to slow down our lives, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). francesca was quite easily overwhelmed by situations that caused her a great deal of stress. her final week and her conflict with her best friend were extremely detrimental to her mental health. in her final days before her showdown with abby, she texted one of their other friends about how she wished they could have their friendship back. their friendship was truly noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. every day, a simple conflict led to a large fight that didn’t need to happen. if only francesca and abby had slowed down and talked out their differences maybe their lives wouldn’t have ended so abruptly. a significant portion of francesca’s childhood was dedicated to the university of notre dame. her parents graduated from there in 1986 as well as 2 siblings graduating in 2017 and 2021 and a sister who is a current junior. all of whom are with us today to mourn the loss of their beloved daughter and sister. francesca always said that the most inspiring thing about the notre dame culture was its faith, and no one expressed that faith better than father ted https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ hesburgh. father hesburgh was truly a role model to francesca after she viewed his documentary when she was a junior in high school. she was delighted to have the opportunity to watch it again as a freshman at notre dame and always cherished the memory of watching it with her 3 roommates, including abby. father ted’s faith and determination were truly an inspiration to her and she always wished she had been able to meet him. now, hopefully, she can meet him in heaven. rest in peace francesca (“hesburgh” film by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). francesca had always been afraid of death. she never knew when death would come to her but she had always hoped it would be at an old age maybe even in her sleep, although, sadly, that was not the case. because of her fear of death, specifically being murdered but we won’t get into that now, francesca can in no way be related to sister aletheia, whom she read about for moreau. this sister was obsessed with death. not in a creepy way, but more in a way that she wasn’t afraid of it. she was not hoping for death, but simply accepted that death was inevitable and didn’t shy away from talking about it. francesca could learn a thing or two from sister aletheia. she was afraid of death up until the moment before she hit the gravel of the farley parking lot. hopefully, she is now in a better place where she no longer has such fears (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” new york times moreau fye week 3). francesca’s death came so soon after she had officially declared her major. although she didn’t know what she wanted to do with her life, francesca thought that she had finally found something that she could be interested in. she had simply taken the first step in the “career development process” and was looking forward to stepping further into the thought of an actual career. sadly, francesca can no longer have a career because her life was cut short too soon. but we are still proud of her for attempting to make the steps towards a career. what helped push her https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html the most into starting the career decision process were the discussions in her moreau class. her wonderful instructor, nhat nguyen, did an amazing job at talking to his class about career development and what it really meant to be happy in a career. he too is here to share in the mourning of his beloved student ("exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). francesca was lucky enough to come from a background of great privilege. she had always lived a comfortable life with a tight-knit family and loving friends. the word suffering to her would certainly not hold the same weight that it does with others, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t suffer. everyone lives a life that involves suffering no matter how small that suffering truly is. although she did not suffer from anything even similar to dr. jihoon kim, a man who became paralyzed in a snowboarding accident, she spent her fair share of time struggling (“five minutes” grotto network moreau fye week 6). nobody’s life can be perfect, and francesca’s definitely wasn’t, but what’s important is what you do with that imperfect life. while francesca was still young and not able to make a hugely important impact on the world, she still made an impact on the small circle of people around her. her friends, many of whom mourn her loss a great deal and are here today (you can see them all crying in the front row), would all say that she made a positive impact on their lives simply by being their friend and being a kind and generous friend. this was mainly due to the fact that she wanted everyone to feel included and kindness to be spread to everyone as she learned from her catholic faith, specifically pope francis (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis moreau fye week 7). while we all mourn the loss of our dearest francesca maria lee, we must remember the true impact that she has had on many of our lives. she was a strong, independent individual who https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript left everyone who knew her wanted to know her even more. we are so deeply saddened to see such a bright shining star cut down in the prime of her life but we can only hope to spread her memory and let her live on in the hearts of all who knew and loved her… oh and abby too i guess. capstone integration taylor kelly moreau capstone integration 29 april 2022 the pursuit of a life well lived: emotionally, physically, mentally as i sit in front of my laptop, contemplating the specificities of a future that is unpredictable, i find it crucial to first ground myself in the integral values that make up who i am. in attempting to outline what i believe to be true of my life, i generated my personal mission statement. emotionally, i feel successful when i know that i have people i can turn to for laughs, intellectual conversation, vulnerability, and even silence when necessary. mentally, i believe success is in stimulation and in happiness. mental happiness comes from balance in life, but stimulation is something that i must seek. so, in search of challenges, i want to push myself academically and excel at whatever task i take on. physically, i want to continue to grow in building community, through contributions in sports, school, and my outside life. (“week 13 personal mission statement by moreau fye week 13). the mission statement presented above encapsulates what i believe to be the truths about what makes me successful as a person. i find that if one area of my triangle is lacking, i regress as a person, student, friend, brother, son, etc. in using my mission statement to animate the next three years of not only my time at notre dame and outside of school also, it's pivotal that i analyze the concrete next steps in how i can fulfill my mission statement. kicking things off, i am looking forward to the next steps in my academic career as i hit a major transition point in my life. within the next month, i will receive my notre dame acceptance letter and be fully integrated into the school. with this change comes new decisions, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uh71jugkvmj2g4p_eejeoczdrjgi1jlzdrq_xl8jdgq/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1uh71jugkvmj2g4p_eejeoczdrjgi1jlzdrq_xl8jdgq/edit though. in notre dame’s undergraduate career services, navigating your journey, they outline an important step in career search process, which is “study what you enjoy and get involved” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). the advice provided by the career services section helped navigate my mental aspect of my mission statement, in that next year i will be pursuing business analytics (if admitted) and be able to start my career path in the field. i believe this choice is the correct choice for me because not only does it excite me, but it helps stimulate a part of my learning that was never present in school before. as a student growing up, we were always taught the fundamentals of “school”: math, science, history, etc. during my business analytics course, i was challenged in coding and problem solving it changed my perspective. adding to this topic, it is interesting that my mother told me that she felt i was most challenged and stimulated when i am unbothered, free to problem solve on my own and follow my own natural learning curve (“week five discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). in applying her words, i want to continue to seek out my business analytics major by exploring python and machine learning at the 1st floor computer lab, huddled next to other students, all learning. i find that i learn the best when i can struggle with the material. while learning and stimulation are paramount in my development over the next three years, i also want to employ relaxation techniques in order to improve mental happiness, just as pico iyer discusses in his article about how top us corporations often allocate time for employee mental breaks (“why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in my life for the next three years, a concrete example of how i will pursue mental health is through meditation from yoga in my dorm room at least two times a week. on top of meditation, introspection is also extremely valuable in my mental sanity. tasha eurich in “the right way to be introspective” https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ud7dpbgfbzawcomr9owqrtf9v7x6bmcq141thphb6bm/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ primarily focuses on how individuals can explore self-awareness; her main point is to always ask what, not why. (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). in applying tasha’s methodology, i want to start writing down in a notebook the questions that i have during my day. what went wrong with my friend? what can i do better to study next time? these questions will help guide me over the next three years. while my mental health is paramount in me living a life-well lived, my emotional health is also equally important. as outlined in my mission statement, i feel successful when i know that i have people i can turn to for laughs, intellectual conversation, vulnerability, and even silence when necessary. an important aspect of my emotional health also stems from inclusivity and solidarity. in pope francis’ ted talk, he describes how we must treat each individual with respect and dignity because at any moment, that person could contribute something great to your life (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). in responding to pope francis’ sentiments, i want to strive to become a more inclusive member of the notre dame community. in doing so, i plan on running for my hall’s council next year, hoping to secure a position. if i were given the position, my plan would be to turn whatever hall i am thrown into into a place for discussion, equality, and inclusivity. speaking of acceptance, jacob walsh discusses his process of growing up gay and catholic. he found that acceptance in itself is where we ultimately true beauty in our lives (“growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). not only did walsh find beauty in acceptance, but he also found how valuable support systems are through tyler. in my life, i find that accepting friends is pivotal for my mental health; in the next three years, i wish to visit my original gateway friends at least three times a week, despite being in different dorms, to check in and maintain my relationships while also expanding my network of friends. with this in mind https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ arises the theme of accompaniment. in steve reifenberg’s account of his trip to south africa, he discussed accompaniment as a two way street, both the person helping and the person being helped (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steven reifenberg moreau fye week nine). growing up, i found that i also felt better knowing someone had my back, and that i had theirs. this, in its essence, is accompaniment, and it is crucial for my emotional health. in the next three years, with covid-19 now being over, i want to make a return visit to cambodia where i used to do service work at the flow orphanage. while there, i want to help teach the young students english, math, and science, and they can accompany me in teaching me to garden and do other chores around the orphanage. it’s a bright spot in my life. i feel emotionally fulfilled while cultivating relationships; i also find it important in my life to have physical action in order to harness strong communities. in father hesburgh’s movie, a major theme found is that community is cultivated through hard work, sacrifice, and a constant push towards leadership (“hesburgh” by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). in light of hesburgh’s constant pursuit of a great community, i also want to become a face of change. in the next coming years, my goal is to run for a chair in the asian business society, a club that i have been apart of since the beginning of this year. if i were to receive the position, i would uphold hesburgh’s sentiments and advance the club community. improving the club’s community would include promoting a more inclusive atmosphere towards non-asian students. as it stands, the title “asian business society” attracts mainly ethnically asian individuals. if given a better position, i would love to spread a positive word through events, such as the beginning of the year student club event. in combination with hesburgh’s community building, dean g. marcus cole discusses his experiences with racial brutality and ultimately spreads the message that we must be accepting in order to ignite change (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). in the next three years, in order to create physical change in my home, i want to give back my time during summers to coach a summer basketball camp in which i used to play in. while i may not be stopping racism, i want to give back to my community and invite a helping hand to help kids with a simple task, such as basketball. staying with the topic of basketball, it was during my exploration of ruth graham’s discussion about the realizing death is imminent and living everyday with intention did i make a discovery about my next three years at notre dame (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). during my entire life, i have always focused on sports for enjoyment; however, during this past year, i have given up my passions to pursue academics. in the next three years, i want to use ruth’s teachings and give basketball my all, hoping to make and play on the notre dame club team. while this task will be difficult, it's in physical tasks where i find myself successful. the next steps in this process are going to be pushing myself out of my comfort circle and zone, putting myself into challenging games, against challenging players, and challenging exercise. i learned the importance of pushing myself out of my comfort zone through dr. paul blaschko’s video about echo chambers, where it is explained that the groups who surround us in life are often reinforcing ideas that are already true (“how to avoid an echo chamber by paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). in order for me to pursue my true passion athletically, i need to explore new individuals who can push me to be better. this may entail me getting beaten badly on the court by better players here at school for practice, or playing with my cousin who plays division 1 basketball. despite the path i take, it must be in pursuit of bettering myself. over the course of moreau, i have slowly but surely been able to figure out what it means to live a life well-lived. for me, it is the intersection of mental, emotional, and physical success. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s supported by the materials in moreau, i expressed concrete examples of how i plan to tackle these pillars of my success in realistic ways over the next three years. however, given the variability of life itself, it would be ignorant to expect everything to go as planned. when i run into these imminent obstacles during my time as a student, my reaction will define my mission statement. if i am mentally tested in a way where i am struggling, such as my coursework, my response will be to seek out additional tutoring, help from peers, and also adjusting my mindset to understand that grades do not define my life. emotionally, if i feel that i am distancing myself from friends and community, i will have to simply refocus my attention and express to my friends that other aspects of my life consumed me, but i am willing to work towards sustainability and better communication. physically, if i lose focus of my community goals or my own personal athletic goals, i will need to recenter myself and understand why i first started. i will question myself ‘what brought me to this point?’ sometimes remembering our origins can help immensely in getting back on the right path. overall, if i can continue to adjust to my goals, i believe i will live a good life over the next three years. integration 3 a. thigpen moreau fye 4 march 2022 living the good life so far this semester, moreau fye has made me reflect on myself. i have learned a lot about different perspectives and what is important to living a good life with purpose. throughout this semester, i have been corrected about many things i thought to be true, i have learned how to think and act to get the most out of life, and i have identified goals that will help me have a life well-lived. through the materials provided, i have been corrected about many things i thought to be true. the first thing i was corrected about had to do with being caught up with life. in an article, pico iyer says, “we’re never caught up with our lives…,” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this is referencing how we never give ourselves enough time to reflect and slow down in life. before reading this article, i believed that sometimes i was caught up with life. after reading this article, i realized how often i let my mind get ahead of me. so often, my mind is already thinking about the next ten things i need to do. by slowing down, i might be able to focus more and experience fully the things i am doing in the present. the second thing that i learned was the “commonly held belief that in our society that a major equals a certain career path,” ("navigating your career journey" by mereulo center for career development moreau fye week 4) is not true. here at notre dame, i am a finance major, and a lot of times it is hard for me to believe that this does not mean i have to work in corporate finance upon graduation. looking outside of this makes my future a lot less daunting because i know that i am not restricted but instead will have a strong background in finance that 1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ could be used in many different careers. the third thing i learned, that was different from what i had thought, is that introspection is not always beneficial. in her article, tasha eurich says, “introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue,” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this quote implies that looking inside yourself can actually be harmful to your mental well-being. after realizing this, i am able to identify many instances where this has happened for me. i feel that i have had experiences where self-reflection has led to hard and saddening conclusions. it has also led me to conclusions where i think i found the root of a problem, but i apply this reason to all of my problems. none of these things led to positive improvement in my mental state. through the materials provided, i was able to identify that i need to slow down, that i am not limited to one career path, and that introspection may not be helpful which are all things i had not really considered before. the materials given thus far in the semester have also provided me with ways of acting and thinking so that, hopefully, my life will be “well-lived”. in the film about fr. hesburgh, he stresses “...that peace is important, that human life is important, that we have to learn to talk to each other,” ("hesburgh" 1:10:02 moreau fye week 2). i believe that it is important to have a purpose in life. the mission portrayed here, to keep peace and to communicate, provides a strong purpose with which to go about life. i want to incorporate this mission into my life; i want it to contribute to my purpose. i hope to incorporate this into my life by being sure i communicate my feelings to all of those around me and by promoting peace in all situations. the materials have also given me insight into how to think in order to make the most of my life. in her article, ruth graham writes that “...focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic,” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye 2 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week 3). this emphasizes how important it is to think realistically about what is going on in life. i hope to implement this into my life by focusing on the good and the bad in life. i want to be able to consider just as much what is bad so that i have a more objective outlook on life and on my surroundings. finally, the moreau fye seminar class has allowed me to identify a couple of goals for myself to be sure that i am living life in the way i want to. during a reflective conversation, my mom describes me as “...a true cheerleader in that [i] want to cheer others on, lift their spirits, and celebrate their ‘wins’,” (jolee david (my mom) moreau fye week 5). this made me feel very proud. it is my goal to continue to be a “cheerleader” to those around me. i want to be the support system for those around me and to help them with any needs they may have. doing this like this makes me feel like i have a purpose to go about life with. similarly, fr. greg boyle writes, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention,” ("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle, pg. 136 moreau fye week 7). from this mindset, i have come to create the goal for myself to give everyone a chance and live a life free of judgment. by living a life without judgment, i will be able to take all experiences equally and live a life of objectivity. with these new findings, ways of thinking and acting, and goals, i believe i will be capable of having a life well-lived. 3 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 integration 2.1 pdf notre dame, in march 3, 2022 a letter from your future self matthew, i cannot promise you the best semester. i’ve gone through it already, so i should know. unexpected things will happen — some things that will make you happy, some that will not. i will not go into the particulars because it would be a crime to rob you of those experiences, because it is a good thing to live, and a life well lived means the good and the bad. i can only really offer some wisdom i have gained over the semester that i really wish i had had. one thing you must keep in mind is that your path isn’t really a path at all. we like to talk about it that way, but it somewhat skews the actual reality of what you’re doing. the last word for this upcoming semester should be linear. think about it this way, “these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order.  it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow.” (navigating your career journey center for career development moreau fye week 4) new people will present themselves to you, new interests will arise within you, new circumstances will have profound effects on you. one example: your discernment about whether architecture is right for you, i know, has been a struggle in the first semester. you will soon learn to stop thinking about your major as “the end-all, be-all” and start thinking about it as a simple step among many others. and, i’ll be darned if your mom doesn’t reaffirm what everyone else can see in an interview you’ll have with her, that you are good at designing things. but even more importantly, she’ll tell you that it is your passion, and that you should stick with it. (conversation with lauren whatley, february 3, 2022 moreau fye week 5) just know that life cannot be planned like you think it can. sometimes, you need to simply do “what your hand finds to do.” (ecclesiastes 9:10) there is a storm coming for you this semester. i can tell you that your stress will not come from schoolwork. so do not worry about that. prepare, instead, to lean on others; to look for comfort within the people and god you love. true joy cannot come from things. it cannot even come from good things like books or art. no, joy only comes from your relationships. a powerful line from a book you will read goes like this, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together they had a potful of plenty.” (tattoos on the heart, chapter 8: jurisdiction fr. greg boyle s.j. moreau fye week 7) this lesson, i now realize, is not such an easy thing. for one, it requires people, and people are sometimes hard to come by. remember what your grandmother used to say, “when people are angry or sad they are one of three things; tired, hungry, or lonely.” loneliness, you’ll come to realize, is not proportional to the amount of friends you have. there are very extroverted people who go to lots of parties who are lonely. instead, loneliness is a certain lack of connection, a struggle to get beyond superficial conversation, to relax around people, to find real friends. loneliness is, i am certain, the worst possible emotion. that is why you must treasure the relationships you have. hold onto them like your life depends on it, because a life well lived very much does. a short aside: you should know that sitting still and forgetting about your plans and worries is absolutely essential. take time to have fun. “it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you to a place defined by something larger.” (why we need to slow down our lives pico iyer moreau fye week 1) i think a lot of times, our insecurities, fueled by a sort of pride to look good, prevent us from having a genuinely good time. it is impossible to have fun when we are thinking about how we look to others. you will not believe me, but at some point in the semester you’ll be invited to a yoga session, and you’ll actually enjoy it. you’ll especially enjoy the part where 1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the instructor tells everyone to close their eyes and just be. and in that moment you’ll not be thinking about how you look to others, because they’ll all have their eyes closed and you will too. and you’ll be happy. in a similar way you should remember that life and experiences like these are fleeting, a thought sometimes called memento mori. a nun said that this idea, “allowed [her], not exactly to cope, but to surrender everything to god.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ruth graham moreau fye week 3) so stop worrying about what you are projecting, at least for a time, and surrender everything to god. this semester is going to be hard. i will not lie. but a life well-lived is filled with hardships, of regrets, of even loneliness at times. we were designed by a loving god to do the hard things that need doing. we are not promised an easy life. a video that you will watch is about a man you was paralyzed during a snowboarding accident. he will never walk again. yet he says, “the purpose of my life is not simply to overcome suffering suffering is a part of our lives the purpose of our life is how to respond to suffering.” (5 minutes aria swarr moreau fye week 6) so you must not wait for the circumstances to change for to be happy. you must stand your ground, even in the face of suffering. father hesburgh, a seminal figure in that university which you call home, believed in standing his ground also. he said, “if you want to do something good, i think there’s a lot of room right here to do something good.” (hesburgh jerry barca, christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) “here” might not just mean a place. it might mean a season in your life, perhaps a season of hardship. in fact, it is those times when it is most important to do good. no, i cannot promise the best semester. i can only give you this advise; take time to have fun, hold fast to your friends, trust your god. go boldly into whatever suffering you encounter knowing that it is those times that truly make a life well lived. your self, 2 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 integration 3 moreau moreau fye integration 3 24 february 2022 the nettie guide to life, laughter, and the in-between death. what an interesting concept, individual to each person but universal in its own ways… and of course inevitable. death has always been something that i tried to ignore, push away, and not think about in my life, but of course here we are, me talking to you about death as it pertains to me. with this in mind, because this death does pertain to me, i have the ability to talk about it however i choose. for me, this is not about death, but rather life. today i choose to talk about life. a life well-lived. pope francis once said, “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others…each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope franics, moreau fye week 7) as i gather you all here today, i want you to be constantly reminded that no one goes through life alone. we are all here for one another, supporting, and loving each other no matter what, and that is why you are all here for me today, because of the relationships that we established and grew together. throughout my life, i worked to the best of my ability to form meaningful connections with others, truly seeing people for their inside characteristics and trying to understand their stories. i wish i had more time to grow and develop connections with the whole world, but as you sit here today, i want you to leave with a goal in mind. here it is: say hi and smile at one new person each and every day. you have no idea the world of difference a smile could make in someone’s life. everything in our world is connected and happiness can be discovered in our life through harmony between “the whole and each single component.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis, moreau fye week 7) with relationships in our minds, i would like to talk about the one that i had with my mom. lindsay rooney is not your ordinary person, but rather someone who is truly extraordinary. not only did she work tirelessly at home to give me, my brother, and my dad the best life, but she worked tirelessly to cultivate generosity and love in her relationships with others, which was truly admirable. i cannot think about a day that went by without my mom sending flowers to a friend who was down, bringing dinner over to a friend that had surgery, or just sending a short text to remind them that they are loved. thank you for inspiring me mom and for always continuing to do so, and thank you for being the most selfless and outstanding role model that i could have ever asked for. my mom knew me the best out of anyone (discerning a life well lived, moreau fye week 5), so together we always talked about my future plans, hopes, dreams, and aspirations. she enabled me with the courage to feel like i could fly in life, and was always there to catch me when i came crashing down. she let me take risks, discover who i wanted to be, all while helping me make the world a better place. mom, i will say it again, i love you more than the world. continuing on this note, i further want to remind you all that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip…it’s not a one step process” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development, week 4). for all the young ones sitting here today and even the oldies (this applies to you too), i want you to be reminded that you are never stuck. there is always the ability to change what you want to do no matter what stage you are in your life. i can tell you that when i was in college i was very conflicted about my future, struggling to come up with a plan, which made me feel behind others. well, you are not. no one knows exactly what they want to do, some people are just better at hiding it. so, with this in mind, here is your second goal for today: experiment, fail, try again, and discover your passions one step at a time. and please cut yourself some slack because being kind to yourself is the only way that this will work. you must love yourself before you can love others. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, moreau fye week 1). imperfection. i was imperfect, you are imperfect, and even zac efron is imperfect, although it may seem impossible. it’s okay to make mistakes because it is through mistakes that the most meaningful developments can be made. despite what you all may think, i made many mistakes in my life. i hope you all heard the exaggeration in that statement…i was so imperfect, but this is what made me human. my advice is to take the time to appreciate your imperfections, learn from them, and be better in the future. oftentimes, we are so caught up in the world around us that we forget to take in the present moments, failing to notice the most important things in our lifetime. with this comes the third goal for today: each day take 1-5 minutes to think about something that you are grateful for in your life. this can be when you wake up in the morning or before you go to bed at night, but i promise that it will help you to focus on living a more positive and optimistic life, truly taking in your surroundings and appreciating the world for all that it has to offer. while focusing on the good is always important, being stuck trying to focus “only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic…but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, moreau fye week 3). throughout my life, i often found myself afraid to focus on the bad in my life, purposefully avoiding it until it often caught up with me. my advice to you, don’t make this mistake. it is easy to focus on the “pretty, beautiful, bright, and shiny” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, moreau fye week 3), but it is through allowing yourself to be vulnerable that the dark realities will be faced, ultimately finding the true meaning and good in them. “when hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on things that we do not have” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich so here comes my fourth goal for today: when something bad happens to you in life think about all that you are gifted with, instead of what you don’t have. okay four new goals for today to learn from me and live a life well-lived. i know that these goals won’t change the trajectory of your future, but i do know that they will lead you closer on the path towards a life well-lived. the first: say hi and smile at one new person each and every day. the second: experiment, fail, try again, and discover your passions one step at a time and please cut yourself some slack. the third, each day take 1-5 minutes to think about something that you are grateful for in your life. last but certainly not least, the fourth: when something bad happens to you in life, think about all that you are gifted with, instead of what you don’t have. your life is governed by the choices you choose to make, you have the power and ability to live a life however you please, but with this in mind remember, “you don’t make decisions because they are cheap; you make them because they’re right” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley, moreau fye week 2). capstone integration living my life to the fullest am i living a successful life and how do i determine what a successful life is made up of? it has always been my biggest dream to live a life well lived. one where i can look back on my life and feel happy about how i loved the people around me and used all the gifts that god gave me for the better. this semester of moreau really made me realize many factors of how to live a life well lived and made me reflect on things i must improve on and change. one activity that made me reflect on my life and values was writing my personal mission statement. the mission statement that i wrote was, “as a first generation college student who is currently attending one of the greatest universities of the nation, i am in pursuit of an education which will eventually lead me to one of the greatest goals of my life, which is to attend medical school someday. as a catholic student, i believe in the integrity of hard, honest work and all the many benefits that come along with it. i believe that everyone has a purpose in this school and in this world and that people should use their gifts and talents to inspire and help others. i believe that it is my duty to continue with my education and to follow all of the great examples of perseverance and hard work that my parents have instilled in me. attending the university of notre dame has allowed me to encounter many intelligent and inspiring people who encourage me to work harder in pursuit of my dreams. i believe that god has given us the necessary tools to be successful and happy in our lives and we must use them to bring other people up as well. i believe that the true meaning of success is to accomplish a big goal but also building great relationships with people and family along with making a positive impact on the lives of people around us. i hope that through the education i am receiving i can accomplish my life goals but also inspire others to do the same” (“my mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). my mission statement accurately and totally reflects on how i want to orient my life. i know that i want to be successful and accomplish many great things but i also know that i want to take care of myself and my mental health. one way that i can accomplish this is by meditating everyday. “meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, tedmoreau fye week one). i also know that the journey to ultimate success will have its own challenges and hardships but that it is an essential part for character development and strength. one quote that i really liked was, “there is meaning in suffering, but to really understand that you have to first suffer yourself. test your faith, but in the end i found strength” (“hesburgh” by theodore hesburghmoreau fye week two). my mission statement focuses on using the things and people in your life to be happy and i think that it is something important to do instead of always desiring more. i believe that spending more of my time focusing on the good will bring me the most happiness. one quote that i liked was, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week three). others will be able to see my mission in action once i am using the gifts that i have for the good of myself and the world. “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family centermoreau fye week four). i understand that the key to a successful life is using your gifts that one already has to achieve goals and dreams. goals and achieving them while overcoming obstacles and growing in character are also keys to a good life. while having a conversation with my mom, she said, “you value hard work and never give up when you know what your goal is” (“discernment conversation activity” by yulma acevedomoreau fye week five). i know that i will know i have lived a good life when all my dreams have been obtained and i have built many strong relationships with my family and friends and understanding that when times get tough i can rely on the people i love and especially on god. like this quote said, “god is good and god loves us but the purpose of my life is not about overcoming suffering, it is about how to overcome suffering with god” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six). it is difficult to live a good life and follow my mission statement once a rough time in life is happening. i hope in the future to not only understand that i am never alone but also to have hope and faith for what the future has in store for me. one quote that i really liked was, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that does not dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven). so far i have focused a lot on living a good life through the successes that one has, but living a good life is also determined by the relationships one makes and the love that one shares and has to offer. one quote that i really liked was “they did not see their grand caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenbergmoreau fye week nine). i liked it because it showed that by giving someone all you have to offer, you are experiencing true love and happiness. even though it can sometimes be hard to understand others and love them, it is a fundamental part in becoming a better person. one quote that stood out to me was “each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious effort to expand our circles” ( “i am george floyd. except i can breathe and do something” by marcus colemoreau fye week twelve). it is important to surround yourself with other people in order to maintain a common understanding that you are not always right and to expand your views on other opinions. another quote that i thought was important was, “by surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree which is accelerating political polarization” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week eleven). most importantly, i want to learn to live a good life by loving myself and being appreciative of all the work that i do. i want to continue doing this by deepening my relationship with god. one quote that i liked was “i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week ten). i think that it is very important to love god in order to love myself. the goals in my life have not changed. i mentioned in my past integration paper that i want to be remembered as someone who didn't let the challenges of life deter her from reaching what she truly wanted in life and that still holds true (“integration three” by moreau fye week eight). in conclusion, i am very grateful for all the lessons that moreau offered me this year. i hope to hold my mission statement close to my heart and continue expanding it with my values as i move forward through my career at notre dame. capstone integration moreau fye professor taylor 28 april 2022 love and success i am a person that values love above all else. i believe that love is literally god in a catholic sense. given this, i strive to embody love in my actions, relationships, and life. in the pursuit of success, i intend to apply myself fully to my goals and reach them. in doing so, however, i must recognize that material success is less important than my core values. specifically, the most important indicator of my success is the manner in which i carry myself in my relationships. although relationships, like every aspect of life, are complicated and complex — i must adhere to a standard of respecting the human dignity of each and every individual. i believe that by maintaining the value of love throughout all of my relationships while pursuing my own ambitions — i can accomplish the most good for myself and others. that being said, responding to difficulty and suffering while maintaining such a standard is difficult. as such, acting with both courage to do what is right and the humility to seek the help of others when you do not know what is right is critical to my mission. by doing so i may grow in wisdom throughout my journey, and hopefully pass said wisdom on later in my life. over the next three years i need to take advantage of the many opportunities that will be offered to me. academically and professionally, i must work diligently to prepare myself and work towards a career that i can be proud of. that being said thanks to the conversation i had with my mother about who i am and who i aspire to be, i need to be aware of the consequences of pursuing such things solely. in my reflection i wrote, “how i feel and what i value is not always conveyed in how i act and that i need to take more care with my actions to ensure i am doing things that i would want to see myself doing” (moreau fye week five). knowing this is crucial to living the life i wish to. to truly focus love at the center i cannot allow career, academics, or selfish motives to drive all i do. although these goals are very important in my material success and goals, they are almost irrelevant with respect to my mission. as stated, the health and benefit of the relationships in my life are crucial to leading a life with love at its center. throughout the course, we have discussed the nature and importance of relationships in some detail. in the ninth week we read professor reifenberg’s theory of accompaniment. he writes, “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). although reifenberg writes in terms of visiting and living with the extremely impoverished — the notion of accompaniment applies to every aspect of relationship. by recognizing the mutuality of suffering, ignorance, and difficulty, one can approach their relationships from a perspective that attempts to understand that fact. instead of living within your own world and focusing on how everything affects yourself, attempt to listen to the world of others. arguably, however, this manner of accompaniment requires a certain level of humility. it is extraordinarily easy to bring yourself under the impression that you are practicing accompaniment, when in reality, by attempting to empathize with others you assume that your experiences and history were in some way superior or even inferior to theirs. although there is certainly some aspect of objectivity in the level of difficulty an individual has faced, i think that in order to best support any person, especially those you are close to, is to leave any trace of that measure behind. to truly support you can neither make excuses for someone’s difficulty nor their success, but as professor reifenberg argued — walk with them, together. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing throughout the year, i have developed and become more aware of what i value and how i can live in accordance with those values, but there is always learning to be had. to assume one has the answers, especially at the point in life i am now, would be foolish and arrogant. instead, i must work with what i have discovered to learn more while constantly reevaluating what i presumably know already. in the fourth week, we looked at how we can discern our prospective careers. one reading argued, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). during the short time i have spent here already i have begun to realize the comfort and ease of sticking to the known. in order to continue to grow here at notre dame, i must, as the career center argues, test the waters and truly push myself out of my comfort zone. an important factor in the pursuit of learning about oneself is the concept of self-reflection. tasha eurich, in her ted article advised, “the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). throughout the process of self-reflection and personal growth, i find it very easy to think negatively about myself. as a naturally pessimistic person, and also a person who is always seeking to improve, i often think about my flaws and mistakes. although in small doses this may be helpful, but as eurich points out, it can also be very unhealthy. instead, i should try more to focus on what exactly i feel with respect to situations and mistakes i have made rather than why i did what i did and why i failed. throughout the next three years i want to value love first. i want to put my relationships with others first and ensure that, as a human being, i am acting fairly and helpfully towards myself and the people around me. i also want to achieve traditional success here at notre dame. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ i believe that by acting with love, working diligently, and expanding my horizons as much as possible, i will be able to achieve this mission. integration three integration three throughout my life i have been influenced by all kinds of people and these influences have shaped me into the person i am today. beginning with my parents, i was shown what it means to establish a healthy loving relationship with others and how to put others before myself. they also taught me the importance of discipline and seeing things through even when they are especially demanding. i think this culminated in their decision to send me to sluh, the catholic high school i attended. while extremely academically demanding, i saw this education through and made the most of it, especially in my extracurricular activities. through these, i was exposed to teachers that truly believed in me and gave me the academic support and challenge i needed to thrive in my field. additionally, my high school experience brought me to many of the first good friendships i have developed over my life. through spending time and connecting with them, i learned how to have fun in an informal environment and support them when it mattered the most. now, i have entered into a new chapter in my life that is in many ways an extension and bigger version of my prior experiences. i am participating in bigger versions of similar extracurricular activities and meeting similar mentor-like figures, forging great friendships, and continuing to academically stretch myself. i believe that these experiences which have shaped me so much have had a large role in forming my personal convictions. my primary conviction is that of faith: i believe that i fundamentally have an inner desire to know and connect with the transcendent. i believe that this is manifest in my life through my catholic faith. over the years, my faith has become less of something that i choose to act on, and has become something that is integrated and woven into my everyday life. in every interaction with others, i think about their humanity and make a conscious effort to treat them with dignity and respect. one idea that has shaped this is the idea of sonder, the idea that every person you see, even distant people who you never physically interact with, have lives as vivid and complex as my own. when i was first exposed to this idea in high school, it honestly blew my mind. i had never thought about that in such explicit terms before. in that moment, i brought to mind all my struggles, friendships, triumphs, doubts, faiths, enemies, secrets, hopes, and desires and something clicked in my mind when i thought about some random kid in the hallway having all of that and more, but in their own individual way. this experience has stuck with me and continues to influence how i treat others, regardless of how well i know them or superficially like them. the next personal conviction that holds deep meaning in my life is my desire to be a lifelong learner. i never internalized or articulated this desire until i was interviewing with microsoft and i was telling the interviewer how much i loved experimenting with new technologies and building things for the sake of building them and learning how to do it. he then interrupted me and said “so you’re saying you’re a lifelong learner?”, to which i responded: “yeah, i guess i am.” while it was nice to have this compliment from someone i looked up to as an experienced engineer working at a large technology company, it brought some insight into the way i structure my life, time, and desires. i truly love learning, and it has made me the person i am today. it brings me joy to the point of “delight [even when] being dissatisfied” (himes). without it, i would not have resurrected my parent’s old laptop, taught myself programming, attended notre dame, or gotten my internship. this is what getting off the treadmill means to me. i do not learn because i am told to or because it is the next thing in a series of things to do, but rather because i am passionate about the subject matter, believe it is important, and find pleasure doing it, even when it is difficult. additionally, this is what allows me to avoid being an “excellent sheep” (deresiewicz, 2014). as described in his book, these “sheep” are excellent students that are very successful on paper. but in reality, these students lack fulfillment and joy because they jump through hoops in order to jump through more hoops. in addition to my passion for learning and building, i also love teaching others the skills i have acquired. a couple of weeks ago, i wrote and presented a talk to the notre dame linux users group outlining something called “self hosting” – the practice of hosting private services on a server you control, rather than using the big-tech public cloud. this is of particular interest because it is in the intersection of data privacy and advanced technology, because the skills necessary for self hosting carry over into the corporate technology world. in giving my talk, i was able to share my personal passion for this subject with other students, and hopefully they were able to learn a thing or two from it. another conviction that has stayed with me throughout my life is the importance of reflection and solitude. finding time at the end of the day for prayer and to think about my day has been critical for organizing my thoughts and finding meaning in the things that i do. i also find personal reflection especially effective when working through personal or interpersonal issues. as part of this, it is critical to ask “what, not why” (tasha eurich, 2017), or rather “what, then why” to make sure your emotions do not run away from you. this form of thinking causes me to reflect more analytically about what has happened and what can be done about it. what is more objective, it is not an open invitation for any thoughts to creep in. why allows any current emotion to take control and crowd your judgment. while eurich’s point is critical for the immediate fallout, as it were, it cuts off a fuller understanding of why something happened that can be obtained by governed emotional feeling. complimentary to this personal reflection is the importance of great friendships. solitude as “the deep friendship of intimate conversation” (deresiewicz, 2010) has been a great way to work through problems, but more importantly it has allowed me to know myself and others better. this is how i can truly be a meaningful reflective leader. if i can combine my experience in my professional field, my personal faith, and my solitude through reflection alone and with friends, then i can lead by putting others first while not compromising the business. this is the core: balance between seemingly incompatible objectives. many people think that trying to grow a business’ profit while protecting your employees and preserving ethics is impossible, but they are wrong – it is merely difficult. in my career and in my personal life, i believe these convictions will allow me to rise to overcome these seemingly impossible challenges. capstone integration yerania serrato-bucio maria finan moreau first-year experience 22 april 2022 how i pursue a life well-lived i think that a life well-lived is different for everyone and it’s hard to know if you’re living a life well-lived until the end. that’s why i believe that you just have to do your best in all that you do. as mentioned in my personal mission statement, my mission in life is to just do my best because life has so much gray area, it’s hard to know what’s always the right thing to do, so just do your best and learn from the outcomes and hopefully i’ll end up having lived a well-lived life ( by yerania serrato-bucio moreau fye week thirteen).week 10 embracing humanity life can quickly become overwhelming because of all the problems in the world. we can’t do everything or solve every problem but i think that as long as everyone makes an individual effort to try to improve, there’s a bit of satisfaction in knowing that you tried. sometimes our best is just doing what we can do and hoping it helps whatever effort we support. the grotto article said, “focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” ("5 minutes" by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). there are so many things out of our control that we can’t do much about but instead of focusing on all of that, we can focus on the things that we can do. for instance, i’m passionate about environmental sustainability and last semester in my sociology class, we discussed the impact modern society has had on the environment. we are destroying ourselves through social media and advertisement while taking the natural world down with us. there isn’t much that individuals can do because large corporations are the ones doing most of the damage but they’ve https://docs.google.com/document/d/1aasnpwbknivywazrbjstrmye8tnore1spofp_hlauoo/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149414 conditioned us to think that we can make a large difference. however, just doing our best is all we can do sometimes and right now being aware of what’s happening could be what makes a difference in our consciousness and behavior. i also believe that in order to figure out how to live a well-lived life, one must reflect on the past . like pico iyer said, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). we all need breaks to do well and reflect on what we’ve done. that’s how we can further improve in our overall well being and performance both in our personal lives and school/work. i like reflecting during the breaks on what i've done during my time here at notre dame. i think about what worked for certain classes and how much i am able to handle during a semester. it helps plan for the future to make sure performance levels will be good and to make changes to ensure life is being well-lived. the meruelo family center pamphlet emphasized that, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). we exist in the context of history so our biography is intertwined with what’s happening in the world and impacts how we behave. a lot of what affects us are things that we typically have limited or no control over and so we aren’t fully conscious of it all the time which i learned about in sociology. however, there are some experiences that we do have power over us such as the opportunities we take and certain decisions we make that we know will impact us one way or another like taking up a certain position or moving somewhere new. i think that when we take time to reflect on all that we’ve done, that’s when we discover what left a lasting impact on us and help us figure out how to live a well-lived life. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ aside from reflecting on the past, it’s important to look towards the future and remember the importance of living a life well-lived. sister aletheia said, “remembering death keeps up awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). by having death be a motivator to live a well-lived life, it makes finding happiness to be much more important. from my experience, most people say they’d rather live a happy and fulfilling life even if it’s short lived rather than living a long life being miserable and unsatisfied. that’s why it’s important to figure out what brings us joy in life and continue to nurture that in order to live a well-lived life. i also believe that joy is found by nurturing relationships. that's why part of my mission is to continue forming and strengthening connections. as stated in pg 139 of tattoos on the heart, “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). i’m from the hood, so we have to form connections to get through life; it’s dangerous to be alone or excluded. connections with other people are what keep us going and help us maintain stability and happiness in life. that’s what’s got me through college so far. the friends i have here have been my friends for as long as i’ve been here. one of my friends here is mariela who lives on the first floor of my dorm. my friend mariela and i went to the library for our conversation and it was nice to take a break to talk. it was a bit difficult because we’re basing everything based on only a few months of knowing each other but we realized that we knew each other well and have more in common than we once thought ( byweek 5 discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity https://docs.google.com/document/d/1s0kbx0pqveeklkremybwpl5kbwe0hr4y6n6iitnqfh4/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/167901 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/167901 yerania serrato-bucio moreau fye week five). that made me feel better about being here and seeing that i was forming meaningful relationships at notre dame. relationships here at notre dame are kind of like building bridges between different walks of life. fr. jenkins said that former university president, fr. ted “was a bridge builder between people and god and among people” ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i think the concept of being a bridge builder is very inspirational. fr. ted was able to be a mediator between many while also maintaining strong faith and remaining true to his ideals. very few people have the gift of being able to make such strong connections with many and be respectful of differing beliefs and i hope to follow his example. i believe that helps in living a fulfilling life when you’re able to connect and help others. it’s also important to bring in what you know to a relationship so both parties can grow together. proff. steve reifenberg said, “drawing from personal experiences gives new meaning to the possibility of engaging in a complicated world” ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this is also what i learned in my giving back through education class when watching the film “waiting for superman”. i saw myself in one of the little girls in the movie who planned to go to med school and knew she wanted to go to college since elementary school. my experiences which were the same as those featured differed from the majority of the class, many of which are in that class because they did want to be teachers. in that moment, i wanted to go back to my high school and start teaching possible science majors chemistry because my high school didn’t prepare me. i realized my experiences would impact the way i approached teaching if i were to become a teacher and how that could make more of a difference to certain students. my engagement with https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149193 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149539 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149539 my community will have been shaped by my experiences here at notre dame and hopefully i’ll be able to make a difference in the lives of others. however, when forming connections it’s important to be mindful of differences in opinions and beliefs in order to properly learn from one another and grow. it also helps to be more at peace with oneself in order to live a life well-lived. as stated in how to avoid an echo chamber, “we need to keep an eye on our own motives when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with and when we find others around us supporting and encouraging us” ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). it’s very easy to say that we listen to different opinions and try to get a full picture, but everyone is already pretty sound in their beliefs and they’re probably not going to change. what’s necessary for people to move away from this is being aware of our biases and figure out why we hold certain ideologies in order to better interact with those from different “bubbles”. that takes a lot of effort but it allows for a lot of personal growth and a chance to be happier in life without being so angry at the opposing side. the reason this is hard to do was mentioned by dean. g. marcus cole. he said, “they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other” ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something." by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). there is a lot of division in the world and it’s shown here on campus. i realized that notre dame can become very clicky and people tend to only hang out with those similar to them. i do the same thing. all of my friends are spanish-speaking mexicans and many other racial groups tend to stick together. this causes more division on campus but it’s comforting to be with those similar to you. that’s when we must act with courage and try to expand our circles in order to understand one another which is a step forward to ending hate. it’s https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149642 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149687 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149687 part of my mission to continue meeting more people that are different from myself that will help me grow as a person. finally, i hope to follow the spirit of inclusion here at notre dame that states, “we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality, and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish” ( "the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by the university of notre dame du lac moreau fye week ten). i think that the environment that notre dame strives for is necessary to live a life well-lived and it’s my mission to be and provide that for other people. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149597 integration three a life well-lived, a life unforgotten i was born on june 27, 2003 to my parents, adriene and john brumbaugh. i was the oldest of three girls. i grew up in a relatively small town, and from as far back as i can remember, always felt a strong connection to my family. my maternal grandparents lived a mere one minute down the street so many hours were spent at their house being spoiled and doted on. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) i learned many life-long lessons from my grandparents, including how to "stop and smell the roses. this was my grandma's favorite saying and she taught me how to appreciate the little things in life. no matter how much work she had in store that day, she always took time to sit in her garden to appreciate her beautiful flowers. together we would drink lemonade and chat about anything and everything under the sun. in a world that always seemed to be in a rush, it was nice to be able to relish in our time together and clear the mind. it always made my chores less daunting as i knew that eventually a well-earned break was coming. my grandmother shared her love of life with me and taught me how to enjoy every second of it.(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) one of the things that i am most proud of in my life is that i learned from an early age the importance of helping others. as our lives come to an end, i can bet a pretty penny that no one will ever lay on their deathbed regretting doing too much charity work. helping others, in my opinion, is one of the best ways to get closer to god. as a young girl, my family would go to the nursing home to visit residents and bring them a little bit of joy. many of them had no family left and i distinctly remember feeling great sorrow as we walked in the homes and saw such sadness on the resident's faces. it didn't take long for them to start smiling when my mom would pull out a deck of cards or bingo to get a game started. in those moments, i felt closer to god then i ever knew was possible. as a child, all i knew was that i was happy to see the smiles and the laughter coming from the residents, however, as i got older i realized what we were really providing for them was hope. as long as you have hope, you can get through anything. i am grateful that my parents were able to instill in my sisters and i the importance of not only having hope but also giving hope. it is the greatest gift one could give a person. showing love to those who are less fortunate is a wonderful way to live your life. (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) as i became older and entered high school, i started to become stressed out from homework and normal teenage life. asking myself "why" was a habit that i unfortunately fell into. if i got a bad grade, i would ask myself why? if i didn't come get hired at the local mall, i would ask myself why? it took me longer than i care to admit but i was finally able to understand that asking "why" was not helpful or beneficial in my growth. i may have spent too much time dwelling on things in my life that were out of my control but i feel proud that i eventually learned to start asking "what" as a better alternative. asking myself what i could have done better to receive a better grade on my next test was much more useful than only concentrating on the negative. once i learned to ask better questions of myself, i became less stressed and had lower anxiety. this is very valuable information that i believe should be ingrained in children so they can hopefully learn to be kinder to themselves. (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” moreau fye week four) i was lucky to have been accepted into notre dame after working very hard and making sacrifices in high school. i made several good friends which is always nice when you are a homesick freshman. i learned many life long lessons during my time at school. one of the most https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ important lessons i learned, in regards to my chosen major, was to not worry too much about my chosen major. this was a great relief because working about whether you made the right decision regarding your path in life can be downright scary. i would like to share with you all what i have taken away from my own experience, in hopes of helping you with your own journey. when you are navigating your career, make sure to keep an open mind! i was taught at notre dame to search within to understand my values, interests, personality and skills. don't be afraid to try new things. i joined a couple clubs and pushed myself out of my comfort zone. once i did some soul searching, i was able to figure out what i really wanted to do with the rest of my life. i cannot put into words how much this shaped the person i would become. i utilized every opportunity that was given to me and tried to make good choices along the way. it was important to me to be able to do what i love while also making a difference in the world(“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). one way to ensure this is to ask yourself three important questions, “is this a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible? is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). the first question, “is this a source of joy?”, determines whether the decision will make you live a happier life. the second question, “is this something that taps into your talents and gifts and uses them in the fullest way possible?”, determines whether the decision will make use of more of your potential than you were using before. the third question, “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?”, determines whether this decision will be beneficial and meaningful to others. sometimes the answers to these questions are hard to find out on your own. there are many things that you might not realize about yourself that others can notice more easily. if you have conversations with those closest to you, then you will be able to understand yourself and how others see you better. (moreau discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit capstone integration professor thigpen miriam, a person in the works coming to notre dame has been one of the greatest accomplishments in my academic career. now i need to continue thinking about what else i should think about for my future, long-term and short-term goals. reminders to help me continue to learn and lead. i do know coming here as a first generation student has been the main challenge when transitioning to a college atmosphere. now ending my freshman year in a few weeks has taught me, and reminded me what i really want to get out of this life. my mission is to understand that sometimes the answer i’m needing can take time at times. this will teach me the practice of patience and that everything falls into place when the time is right. in the meantime i will find different ways to find that solution, answer, cure. coming to college as a first generation student from a hispanic family is very challenging, but also a blessing. not really having guidance from my parents to do, or what’s expected of me as a student. this gives me the chance to learn what a college atmosphere is like. that way i can help lead newer first generation students in my family as support. by continuing to figure out possible career paths, i will continue having an open mind for new ideas and opinions. avoiding the echo chamber is very useful, so ignorant comments won’t be said. not limiting myself to education can benefit me to understand how society interacts with its people, and how it would interact with a person like me. understanding the true meaning of success. learning how to share the accomplishments from that success. teaching how those accomplishments pave a path for other people (possibly the ones around me) on how to reach their own success. comprehending that everyone i meet is for a reason, and can help me become the person i need to be, not what i want to be. finally, the importance of forgiveness when it comes to damage (physically, emotionally, etc.).when forgiving not only could benefit the other party, but can help heal you as a person. learning that holding grudges isn't worth using all of your energy on (moreau fye week 13). obviously in order to know the type of life i want to be well-lived, i need to know what type of life i am living right now. a broad question because there isn’t a right or wrong answer. after reading a ted article by pico iyer they state, “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (“practicing self-reflection” by pico iyermoreau week 1). i know that i’m a person who gets anxious very easily, and sometimes i forget to live the present moment during my time at notre dame. the reason that i should have more fun is because death is closer to us than what we think. according to a new york times article they state, “for almost all of humanity, people died at younger ages than we do now, more frequently died at home, and had less medical control over their final days. death was far less predictable, and far more visible” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau week 3). this quote got me thinking that people didn’t die voluntarily, but because they didn’t have the medical attention available to prevent it. now i think it’s more common that people do it voluntarily, unfortunately, than before because they couldn’t find reasons to continue, or weren’t living their life well-lived. to the end of my first year here at notre dame i saw so much potential for reasons to start living a life well-lived or to help others to do so. the person that really made a difference at the school would be father hesbourgh. in a documentary the narrator says, “hesburgh would https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html move deans, he would move faculty members, he made a change, and he didn’t accept less than excellence. he did a lot of things that people would’ve thought as not priestly, he was entrepreneurial” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry b. christine o.moreau week 2). this gives so much inspiration to many and to me because maybe the change or what i need to pursue is out of the ordinary. when finding our mission, life can throw barriers, some higher than others and bring many to question their faith. if we hear testimonies from others who have been or are going through a challenge it helps us to refocus that what we’re going through is just a phase, and to never stop being thankful for what we have right now. for example one said, “so if god is good, why does he allow suffering into my life?…through reflection, and i researched the conclusion that god is good and god loves us but at the same time, the purpose of my life.. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau week 6). once we realize that in this life there is a balance of bad and good, and we need to learn how to live through any condition. not all that we go through is essentially bad, but a lesson to be learned. there are many people in this world that don’t have the most loving heart for us, but when we’re in this journey looking for our mission there are many that do. i know that for sure because coming from a hispanic family for some people it’s hard to express their feelings and nourishment. that wouldn’t be a barrier because “you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge. in the barrio, people tell you” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr greg boylemoreau week 7). just like events, people also contribute to shaping who you are, whether learning something new about yourself or the things surrounding you. they say that, “every experience shapes in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not! we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/15742 so much.” (“navigating our career journey” by meruelo family centermoreau week 4). sometimes we don’t realize how those experiences shape us until someone notices them. for me my friend realizes that the hard moments i got through in the past don't interfere with my goals in the present day. i cope well by taking bad news, and i don’t take it out on others for something they didn’t do (moreau week 5). there are many others who are still figuring out how to deal with these types of emotions. someone once said, “you must learn to be beside, walking with another person. it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenbergmoreau week 9). it’s already a process to accomplish, and can require us to use our faith in order to gain more patience and understanding through the process. many can argue that, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau week 10). no matter how i would go through those dark times at some point there will be clarity. once that day comes i’ll be able to know what decision to take next. regardless of the outcome of that decision i should be welcoming to meeting new people and avoiding the echo chamber. many may ask what it would mean the “echo chamber: a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr.paul blaschkomoreau week 11). by avoiding being in a circle that doesn’t think other than what they believe in is like dodging a bullet because i won’t be living in ignorance or fear. that’s the main key from many problems occurring in society right now. learning from different races, and cultures can decrease the ignorance and fear inside of us. marcus cole once said, “the racial https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“dean g.marcus cole: i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus colemoreau week 12). i believe that everyone who improves their mindsets, and is more intrigued to learn something new from someone can improve their own mission statements. overall, everyone have different interests on what they want to get out of this life, and what suits them the best. for me i believe it would be to learn and live in very short words. my mission statement can change over time, but as of right now where i’m learning from left and right i should just apply what i learn in order to know what type of life i want to live. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ capstone integration capstone integration april 27, 2022 related in love the first year of college has been a blur. it has gone by so incredibly fast. there have been incredible highs and there have been devastating lows, but one thing i tried to internalize through the rollercoaster of college is taking time to stop and reflect, internalizing the idea that “it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). at the start of second semester i bought a journal from the bookstore and it has become an escape for me, a much needed pause from the non stop excitement of college that has made me realize how important it is to take breaks, reflect, and practice mindfulness. “as a university, you can’t censor ideas if they disagree with your own” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). at notre dame, one of the most powerful things has been the diversity of opinions and thought within the student body. from the hesburgh movie, it is clear that father hesburgh is one of the main reasons why notre dame is the incredible institution it is today. he transformed it from just a school known for football to an academic powerhouse that teaches students to think not just with their minds but also with their hearts. before coming to notre dame, i didn’t expect to be so greatly affected by the catholic education. being someone who is not very religiously motivated, i didn’t think it was going to be that much different from a non-religiously affiliated university. i was at first resistant to the idea of even taking a theology class. but actually being here has opened my eyes to the power of this community, brought together and unified by an uncrushable spirit. something i found really interesting about the “three key questions” article was that in finding one’s individual purpose or identity, in figuring out how to live our lives, it is important to have a circle of friends, to foster a community that will be both honest and supportive of our personal goals. ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). when i’m making a big life decision like choosing what college to go to or discerning my major, a huge part of the process was talking to my parents, friends, professors, tennis coach, etc., because they know me in ways i don’t know or see myself in. this semester has been plagued with internal fear. more than anything i have feared my f u t u r e . https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/471135/download?download_frd=1 my life has always been about the immediate next step: what am i going to get for lunch today, what am i doing this weekend, and sending in applications for college. there haven’t been a lot of big decisions i’ve had to make. “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). i think this quote is really important, because often there is pressure to choose a career based on success or purely what you are good at. it’s important to remember that there are so many other factors that ultimately determine how “right” a career is for us. i love electrical engineering but i am also interested in business, politics, and fashion, something i realized while taking one of the muerelo quizzes and irish compass activity ("week five irishcompass activity" by irish compass moreau fye week five). it reminded me of the ted talk we watched about being a multipotentialite and how that can make us feel lost and unsure what to do. but the article made me realize it's okay to shift gears, change majors, and change entire career paths and it’s all part of the journey of discovering my future. “why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six). when thinking about reflecting and becoming more self aware, something we all need to do, we need to focus on the what not the why. what forces us to name our emotions and to better understand ourselves. this semester i got into meditation, shifting my mindset about what it means to engage with meditation. meditation doesn’t have to be this long inconvenient process but can be something simple like enjoying a cup of coffee or chopping onions, just slowing down and taking time to reflect. in the pope’s ted talk, he articulated our need to help each other and come together as one. we need solidarity not division (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis-moreau fye week seven). in theology, we learned that to be human is to be related in love and while i still have uncertainty surrounding my religious ideas, i think this lesson should guide our lives till the end. “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i worked at the soup kitchen in my hometown. we came there to help, but there is only so much you can do from behind the glass, and i didn’t really engage until we also portioned out the same food for us and we sat down and actually talked with people. we laughed with each other, shared stories, and realized we are in this together and can learn from each other, showing me that solidarity is about connecting to the people we set out to help and not see ourselves as the savior but as the one embarking into a mutual relationship where we both teach and grow. “the antidote to white fragility is on-going and life-long, and includes sustained engagement, humility, and education”("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). people often want to believe they are not racist because they do not act in a derogatory way towards people of color or regard them as lesser. however being white gives https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146017 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146017 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 you privileges in many sectors: politics, education, economic opportunity. and privilege from an unjust system gives us a moral responsibility. “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree which is accelerating political polarization”(“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i think we have a responsibility to seek out people who disagree with us and rise above our own stubbornness to try to understand different points of view. i have noticed this in my own life. i try to stay informed to know what’s going on in our world, but i am not actively participating in the way i feel like i should be. i wrote an essay in philosophy about what we can actively do to correct sexual and racial discrimination, and realized how many creative ideas there are. the constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week twelve) was interesting especially because it connected to what i’ve learned in my first theology class, how the purpose of human beings is to be related to love. to be human is to be related in love, making relationships and specifically the mending of broken relationships vital. we should strive to help each other and foster strength and connection within our community. we should actively seek out ways to achieve equal human rights and justice like dean g. marcus. in reflecting back on my mission statement and the mission statement of notre dame (university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week thirteen), i realized that my life is studded with uncertainty: uncertainty about my major, career, future, relationships, etcs. but there are guiding principles to how i want to live my life, lessons i want to internalize, and a direction i want to go in. i may not know where my final destination is, but i know how to get there and i know what is important along the way, the most important being my relationships and my love for other human beings around me. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146040 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146055 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146055 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146066 fys integration three assignment: my eulogy bordallo 1 theo helm fys 10101-83 march 4, 2022 integration three assignment thoughts from your older and wiser self to: a fellow life liver from: the product of your life thus far (aka your future self) dear colleen, you are already living a life well lived, but you can do better… when i first got to notre dame in the fall, i had many new and exciting experiences. through these experiences, and the discussion of them in respect to various text and video resources in my first year morau class, i came to understand a lot of things about myself, my experiences, and my thoughts on how to live a life well lived. i think that living a life well lived is not conclusive and bounded by certain expectations. i think that it has a lot more to do with expectations that one personally puts on themselves. therefore, as long as one is living in strive of their own personal goals, regardless of the relationship-work life balance, it is a life well lived. especially after the quarantine-induced self reflection period that you went through in highschool, i think you have been able to understand what you want in life, at least on a short term scale. you worked towards these goals actively, got into one of your top choice schools, and grew relationships with others for the better. however, as nothing can ever be perfect, i think you can do better. therefore, i thought i would share some of my experiences and thoughts on living a life well lived. one thing that i am sure you know by now is that you are a hard worker and you have a lot of expectations for yourself. this is one way i know you are trying to live a life well lived. however, i think one of the most important things to consider that is easy to overlook is finding a bordallo 2 tangible and realistic path to achieve your goals. this will help you center your expectations, rather than be overwhelmed by the potential thing you should or could be doing at a given moment. this is something i struggled with during the semester, thinking that i am not doing enough while also being overwhelmed by the work i am already doing. the text from week 1 of morau class expressed this same feeling of not doing enough by saying, “in the age of movement and connection, space, as marx had it in another context, has been annihilated by time; we feel as though we can make contact with almost anywhere at any moment” (“the art of stillness: adventures in going nowhere” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). you can have a lot of goals, aspirations, and expectations for yourself, but i think it is important to be realistic in your goals and understand how you can truly achieve them. the class went on to discuss something similar in week 2 by watching the hesburgh film. in the film father hesburg said, “you cannot put all these inhibitions around a person and then say why don't you try harder. well of course we can all do better if we worked harder but it’s like holding a man underwater and saying why don’t you swim” (“hesburgh: the documentary” by jerry barca moreau fye week two). therefore, by making a clear plan for what you want to achieve, you can more directly and satisfyingly achieve your goals, helping you live a life well lived. another experience i had was during the week of my first biology exam. i spent much of the stress and studying, neglecting others and myself. looking back on this, i realize that i could have still studied and worked to achieve my academic goals, while also being kind to myself. one text from week 3 of class was very helpful with this revelation as it says, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). when ruth graham wrote that, i think she meant that at bordallo 3 the end of the day, we have to spend the most time with ourselves. therefore the most important relationship we can foster and the desires that are most important to satisfy are those of myself. i further took this point away in week 7 of class, when we reflected on what his holiness pope francis said in a speech, “power is like drinking gin on an empty stomach… you lose your balance and you will end up hurting yourself and those around you. … through humility and concrete love, on the other hand, power – the highest, the strongest one – becomes a service, a force for good” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). self love and self satisfaction is key. therefore, i have learned that it is very important to give yourself a break every once in a while and find a good balance of working towards your goals, and living life to the fullest in the present. similar to this, it is also easy to get lost in your own thoughts about your goals for the future that the other aspects of discerning a major can be lost. for example, like d.a. luzzo said in a text from week 4, “planning your career is much like planning for a trip… after you leave nd, some of the details (like choosing a major) will change, but the core elements remain the same: learn about yourself, explore careers, reflect, & take action” (“around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions” by d.a. luzzo and l.e. severy moreau fye week four). i think that students often think of their day to day life as mere stepping stones to their ultimate academic or career oriented goals. however, if students instead consider how they can live a life well-live presently, then they could work to understand how they can develop themselves constantly and find what they truly want to do with their life, instead of what they want to ultimately accomplish. it is understandably difficult to in some way look at yourself from another perspective and try to understand and live your life with your past, present, and future in mind at the same bordallo 4 time. one source that helped me understand how i should approach this problem is the video that we watched for week 6 of class, which says, “when the hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (“5 minutes” jihoon kim moreau fye week six). i think that the quote shows that it is easiest to be overwhelmed and completely consumed by singular perspectives. whether it be by only focusing on a past event that you don't want repeated, or a current event’s instantaneous effect, or a future goal that you must achieve, looking at life with only one perspective inmind is often detrimental to the other aspects of your life. therefore, try to take a step back, look at the bigger picture, and find a balance between working for the benefit of your past, present, and future self. one aspect of doing this has to do with the relationships that you share with others. another major event that occurred within the semester that contributed greatly to my development is the process of discerning my major. this is a topic that was thoroughly discussed during class, especially week 5 when we had to have conversations with a trusted friend or family member for enlightenment on how others see you and what that reveals to us about our chosen majors or career paths. for example, i had my conversation with my friend melody, who you have yet to meet, who gave helpful insight on how she sees me deal with everyday situations that support my choices in study and career. i wrote of this conversation in my qqc for that week, which says, “her experience gave the descriptions very tangible and specific things to attach itself to. there, this portion of the conversation stretched my awareness of myself, as well as confirmed something i knew about myself to another level” (“discernment conversation activity reflection” by moreau fye week five). this portion of my qqc illustrates the impact of using relationships in a beneficial way. melody helped me understand myself by describing my actions and thoughts in her perspective. therefore, another aspect of bordallo 5 living a life well lived is by placing trust in others to help you understand yourself. it is easy to get lost in your own thoughts and perspectives of yourself, so grounding yourself with the help of others is important to living a life well lived. therefore, although i think that living a life well lived is very subjective and you have been able to somewhat achieve a life well lived thus far, i think that being conscious of what you are doing and what you will do is important. simply thinking about what you should do to live a life well lived shows that you are already on the right path. so keep going, keep your head up, and live a life well lived. sincerely, you from the future bordallo 6 works cited iyer, pico, and einarsd́óttir eydís. the art of stillness: adventures in going nowhere. ted books/simon & schuster, 2014. “the art of stillness: adventures in going nowhere” by pico iyer moreau fye week one '99, author: jerry barca, et al. “hesburgh: the documentary: university of notre dame.” notre dame magazine, 10 apr. 2019, https://magazine.nd.edu/stories/hesburgh-the-documentary/. “hesburgh: the documentary” by jerry barca moreau fye week two graham, ruth. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” the new york times, the new york times, 14 may 2021, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three luzzo, d.a., & severy, l.e. (2009). around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions. in making career decisions that count: a practical guide (3rd ed.) (pp. 1-12). upper saddle river, nj: pearson education inc. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ “around we go: the developmental process of making career decisions” by d.a. luzzo and l.e. severy moreau fye week four bordallo 7 “discernment conversation activity reflection” by moreau fye week five kim, jihoon. “5 minutes.” grotto network, 10 nov. 2021, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/. “5 minutes” jihoon kim moreau fye week six francis, pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_build ing_includes_everyone/transcript. “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_build moreau integration three was she reserved, or was she just thoughtful? i think one of the few days you look back and remember how impactful someone was on your life is the day they leave. i’ve acknowledged so many inspiring people who have walked this earth, entered my world, and left, yet i believe every single one of them has met me for a reason – it’s either i’ve changed a small part of their life, or they’ve changed a small part of mine. callie was like them – she changed mine – yet she was one of the very few people who’ve left a great impression on me. sister theresa aletheia noble once mentioned, “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” ruth graham – week 1). this described and didn’t describe callie all at once. she’s always anticipated death; death is a natural phenomenon that she knew she would have to face one day, but she also continued to talk about her life as if she had so much to do and look forward to – she never had a final or an end goal. after she accomplished something, she would create another goal – an even bigger and brighter goal. she would ask me if i believed in life after death one second, and then talk about how she couldn’t wait for a positive future to come the next. she was extremely curious; this was a trait i’ve always admired. she would ask the most random questions in the middle of the day; questions like “do you ever see yourself in the future and having regrets about how you’re currently spending your college years?” by the time i’m answering, she’s already thinking of another question. i don’t think there was a single second where she stopped thinking or reflecting, which makes me believe that she had so much to say despite her more reserved nature when interacting with acquaintances. you heard that right. she was reserved, but reserved in a way where she was respectful and kind. she was trustworthy and knew how to read the room. a lot of people respected her that way because she knew how to provide us with insightful advice yet knew how to keep things to herself. the quote “and while you are the author of your story, it is often helpful to involve those you trust” (“discernment conversation activity” – week 5) reminds me of her. i want my life to be lived a certain way, and i want to steer my own wheel, yet i don’t think i could’ve done it without her. i’ve spent so much time talking to her about my problems, my feelings, and decisions that i made, that my life would be different without her. if there was a person i needed to talk to, it would be callie i ranted to first, and she’d never tell a soul. she was an open book, yet she’d never tell me anyone else’s problems – that’s how i knew my secret was always safe with her. ann landers told father hesburgh, “i don’t know another living soul that i would talk to on the phone as long as i talk to you. i always learn something, and you are immensely supportive in the areas where i need it – whether you know it or not.” (“hesburgh” ann landers – week 2) like i’ve implied, callie was someone i could talk to whenever i needed to. she never forced me into doing something i didn’t want and never tried to take control of my wheel. she was supportive and respectful of my decisions, fully knowing that she would want me to do the same if she was in my position. even though she may come off as “boring” or “quiet and shy” to some people, she was full of life and joy. she’s always made efforts to bring a smile to my face and she knew when to crack jokes – this was a form of vulnerability, knowing that she’s breaking down her walls and finally showing a part of herself she doesn’t typically show other people. she was quiet when she only needed to be – and this means being quiet around people she doesn’t think are important enough to reveal her vulnerability to. “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” pico iyer – week 1) we always have someone that we turn to because they’re familiar – they’re the person we run to when we want someone to come home to or the person we want to talk to when we don’t feel like talking to anyone else. callie was like that to a lot of people – i think people just felt comfort in knowing that she remembers a lot of people’s struggles and tends to comfort them anyway she can. i personally felt my best around her because she uplifted my mood and she never made me regret my choice to confide in her, even during my darkest moments. she pays attention to each and every single one of the people she cares about and never brushes anyone off. “so if god is good, why does he allow suffering into my life?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr week 6) is a question dr. kim posed. rather than the question, why does he allow suffering into my life, i tend to question why he allows suffering into the lives of people who are good. everyone has their fair share of burdens and struggles, and i’m not saying that other people deserved the troubles they had upon them, but i questioned the specific struggles that came to callie. i wondered why so many people turned against her when she was so good to them. i wondered why it was hard for her to find people who appreciated her for who she is, when she never openly judged anyone else. but in the end, i know one thing for sure – despite the problems she’s encountered in this life, her only mission was to be good. not for the world, not for others, but to have good intentions in general. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (undergrad careers website week 4) she embraced every obstacle she encountered with courage and knew that whenever she encountered a bad experience with a person, it was because she knew she had enough willpower to overcome such an experience. she grew stronger with every single one, and that’s what i appreciate the most about her. she teaches other people to be strong, but doesn’t forget that she herself is also strong. lastly, i would like to quote tattoos on the heart, “our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love.” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – week 7) one thing callie never forgot to remind others is of how much room we actually have in our hearts and how we should not reserve those rooms for factors we can’t control – race, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, etc. as an indonesian, callie had always known what it was like to be a southeast asian living in a predominantly white area. she also knew what it’s like living as a non-native indonesian in her country – it wasn’t easy to accept that she seemed to always be part of a minority. however, she still made sure to embrace every single person with the same amount of love – she tried not to discriminate. all in all, a lot of people never knew callie the way she would have liked to be known, nor did they remember her the way callie would’ve liked them to remember her. knowing her, i don’t think she would want me to explain every single good thing she’s done in her life nor try to convince you that she was a good person. but she wants me to let you know that she’s only ever been genuine – she only talked to people she knew were good, she only spent her time on people she knew were worth caring about, and every single person who she’s ever talked to was due to her genuineness. she had her own moral values that not everyone agreed with, but she was respectful and kind whenever she could be. she left our world with amazing memories that i don’t think i will ever forget nor would i ever recreate with anyone else – not that i would ever want to. integration moreau 4/29/2022 the power and passion in my forgiveness since the beginning of my life, i have been one to love the purity of this planet and our nature, as need most of us did when we were children. i loved to climb the trees for the only reason of loving it. i loved to run because i just loved it, and i loved to learn because i just loved it. i believe there is so much power in the way we think and the way i can set my mindset. my life will be guided by my enjoyment: what makes me crave for more but challenges me to the most i can be. there is the passion that we rational humans do not understand, but we cannot let our ignorance stop us from achieving those feelings. how i will have a life well-lived is by listening to my nature and acknowledging myself through forgiveness and reflection. i do because i can, for living is my passion. i live for the struggles and the laughs, the moments of inspiration and a new idea. i will always live for the journey and keep the destination as a trophy and reminder of the journey. the gas of my life will be the connection to my nature, telling what i love. i will build that connection in my relationship with god. the foundation of my identity will be a child of god. my connection with god comes through all the links around me, including the relationships to people. “ we all need each other.” (pope francis week 8) the first and most powerful step in a life well lived is confidence and the control of our ego. no one human is the main character in this world which is hard to hear at times. the connection with others is how we, yes become better as a society, but also as individuals. i’ve often heard how we are more connected than we consciously realize. connecting to others is connecting more to one’s self. the awareness we have grown is the realization of our nature in a more profound step. the way i will make this happen is to make forgiveness the center focus of my life. understanding that with each life story comes new lessons and the more i can experience these lessons through others, the larger my awareness can grow. this is why in an argument i take in every bit because it can only make me better and more aware, and i already forgive them because i understand them already and if i don’t i understand that there is something i dont understand. growing with the other humans on this planet is the ticket to my happiness, for my nature is to be one with them. as the father, the son, and the holy spirit are one. i am with all others. i need others because i am part of each person. i wish to lead my life in a way that others will want to follow, but to be someone that knows how to live without a weight on my shoulders take time to learn and develop awareness of how to learn. “good teachers are usually good learners” (professor steve reifenberg week 9). i believe learning comes through reflection and again forgiveness, but being willing and able to set aside the ego to let yourself know that you know nothing at all is the only way to start to open your eye to the truth. as i mentioned in my qqc in week 9, i have learned much about learning itself, and through every experience i have, i hope to come to it assuming i do not understand so that i can get everything i can out of it. the way a leader must think is the way jesus christ thinks. “jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god” (jacob walsh, grotto week 10). the color of our world comes from our diverse world. to have a life well-lived, i must see myself as a leader like jesus. he is humble and passionate and lives without assumptions. forgiveness filled him and flowed in his veins. to lead my team, my workplace, my relationships my life, i must be the one to forgive those i dislike the most and always assume the good intentions of every individual. diversity reflects these aspects perfectly, for if you are accepting and forgiving, uncomfortable is less of a challenge than someone who isn't forgiving. the assumptions are the root, as i said in week 10. i will aways be one the one invite the outsider. the one to give everyone a chance and a friend. being aware the keys to growth and round your understanding to avoid these assumptions, but this can be lost in this day and age with social media and the internet. in week 11, we talked about this effect of technology and the formulas that create bubbles. “they all have extremely similar backgrounds and political views.” (dr. paul blaschko, tinknd week 11) looking at the negative is definitely something that will not contribute to a life well-lived, but understanding the ones that concise of trends and recurrence deserve criticism. the opportunal connectedness of the internet is wonderful, but this opportunity is taken advantage of and used to only reinforce our own opinions and thoughts. the way to solve this is awareness of ourselves and searching for those that are different from me because that is where i will grow. if the ego is more important, i will stay stagnant in my growthful journey, which is falling and failing in the eyes of god. all these things are so important to have a life well-lived, but they are all so simple in thought, but not in execution. i find it so powerful to know that these changes take such little pause and awareness, but also then terrified that these things are the things leaving humanity in the subconscious and reactionary. such small things can also make a traumatizing life-changing impact, as in marcus cole’s experience in week 12 (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law schoo week 12l). awareness is easy in retrospect but if one looks at it as easy is the moment it slips from us. to help others find and keep awareness as well as myself, i will always continuously check myself and reflect to make sure i am don’t get anger from the lack of forgiveness. i will strive to make every small part of my surroundings better through the small things. to be aware of the seemingly simple aspect of living simply because you love it seems difficult considering the number of akes and pains that comes through life, and the work it takes to feel free and live with god in your heart is a lot, but it is not painful work at that. though, forgiveness and soft reflection will be my blood and bones. to live a life well lived, we need each other, and to build relationships and family community in every part of my life. i will live my life with freedom in my mindset to give my potential the room needed to build my own awareness of my life and improvement. work cited “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” (professor steve reifenberg) “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” (du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame) “how to avoid an echo chamber” (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd) “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school) mark van kirk prof. vanessa chan moreau fye 29 april 2022 shining like christ i realized my greatest aspiration in life when i read martin luther king, jr’s “three dimensions of a complete life.” at one point towards the end of the speech, king alludes to the day that we will stand face-to-face with god. “on that day,” he says, “the question will be, ‘what did you do for others?’” that question seems to echo in my head when i am in doubt, when i am at my worst, or when i am simply reflecting on who i am or who i want to become. life has a way of flashing before us at some moments, but other times it seems like it will drag on forever. but both visions of life have incredible meaning if we are devoted to stepping out of ourselves to help others. and that is what martin luther king, jr., gets at when he poses the question: “what did you do for others?” my mission is focused on giving my answer to that question as much substance as possible. but i frequently find myself thinking, “once i have this (money, security, more time, etc.) or finish that (the semester, school, etc.), then i will be able to serve, … then i will be able to help, … only then i will be able to do something for others.” yet the fascinating thing is that it never seems to happen. my “beginning point” for service is always pushed back into the stacks, and it often seems like i am too comfortable to allow my life to adapt to outside needs. thus, an idea that was presented in the first week of this course rings true: “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). i feel like i’m rushing around in a goopy confusion, unable to slow down and experience the truly important elements in life. i certainly need to devote my time more consciously, and i will do that this summer as a counselor at falling creek camp in north carolina, an all-boys camp that i attended during middle school. taking the advice of fr. michael himes—“look for the task that will continue to stretch you”—i will be sharing a cabin with fifth graders and entering into their lives in a profound way (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). in a beautiful way, i will enhance the growth of these young men as well as suffer with them in their times of need. i will realize an important aspect of faith: “in faith we learn there’s meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that we have to first suffer ourselves” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). as a counselor, i pray that i will also gain a glimpse of what my ultimate vocation is. i have begun to explore this that out through the career development process, and “[will] engage in it again and again as needed to effectively manage [my] career” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development – moreau first year experience week four). but, regardless of what i end up doing, i will make sure that my work promotes the common good. i will not become a political hobbyist, allowing “emotion [to be] the goal that makes [me] feel connected to something without doing anything [myself]” (“passion isn’t enough” by shankar vedantam – moreau fye week eleven). rather, i will venture into the world to make a lasting change—whether that be for one person or for the world. while king’s question might be a simple one, it becomes a harder question to answer when things do not turn out as we expect. for “when hardships happen to us, we often focus on https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202?module_item_id=145988 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/145968 ( ( https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ the things we do not have” (“five minutes” by aria swarr – moreau first year experience week six). as i studied for finals last night, i began to focus on the fact that i did not have straight as or complete understanding in all of my classes. in doing so, i overlooked the great friends that i had made over the course of the semester and the material that i did understand in my various classes. i was reminded that the beauty of friendship greatly outweighs the letters that appear on a report card. i was able to appreciate “the ready way folks and homies tell you that they love you” (tattoos on the heart by greg boyle – moreau first year experience week seven). one step that i need to take towards serving others is listening to them. “good teachers are usually good learners, … open to new ways of thinking about the world, and enthusiastic about engaging those insights with others” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). if i am to help others on their journey towards selfless love, i must be able to listen to them and see them as they are. in making this effort to understand another, i am “making [a] conscious decision and effort to expand our circles,” something that marcus cole suggests is vitally important in a complete life (“i am george floyd” by marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). during my next three years at notre dame, i hope to discover how i am called to meet and serve others. for “[one] can’t convince [himself] god loves [him], but [he] can ask him to show [him]” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week ten). maybe i will be empowered to bring this message to others, or even be brought this message by another. for at notre dame, i know that anything is possible: “notre dame’s character as a catholic academic community presupposes that no genuine search for the truth in the human or the cosmic order is alien to the life of faith” (“mission | university of notre dame” – moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146064 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/items/146064 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ fye week thirteen). so, i step into the world with hope that my god will light my path so that i might begin running with purpose and conviction. the final integration combs 1 professor harrington moreau first-year experience 15 march 2022 a mission of solidarity in understanding my mission is to live a life rooted in honesty and the pursuit of understanding. i want to live a life that inspires a positive environment around me that would cultivate my understanding of the world and cultures i am not familiar with. the love in my mission is inspired by my dad. his active role in my life mirrors the role i want to have as a father someday. my mission is to uphold the values that define me as a friend and one day a father. (week 13) during week seven of our time in moreau we were assigned a ted talk in which pope francis said, “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the ‘culture of waste’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i think this quote ties into my mission statement well because i believe solidarity must be achieved through understanding and compassion. as stated by fr. gustavo gutiérrez, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by fr. gustavo gutiérrez moreau fye week nine). the basis of my mission being rooted in honesty is to help create an environment around me that helps me to pursue an understanding of other cultures. i do not want to be their voice but rather hear their words. the impact of my mission statement on my life is the largest with my wish to understand. i do not think i can change the world’s perspective. however, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit combs 2 my mission statement is about how i can impact my own life and the lives of those around me. i want to pursue these values in every aspect of my life. the next three years of my life are not clear to me. however, i know the morality i wish to traverse these years with. i believe my mission statement will have a profound impact on my relationship with my family. in high school, i had a typical relationship with my parents. i went through the early teenage years and we fought. however, since i have come to college i have started to value time with my family much more. i go out to dinner with my parents before i leave for college after a break and i spend real time with my brother. these are things i have never done before. in part, these actions are influenced by the idea “remember your death.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). during the process of writing my mission statement, this quote lingered in my mind. my parents only have so much time with me and i want to spend it being honest and enjoying it. life is too short to waste. one factor of my life that has hindered my ability to spend time understanding others has been my phone. the week one reading stated “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas is” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i resonated with this quote as i remembered all the time i have wasted on my phone. as a freshman in high school, i can remember wasting eight or even nine hours a day on my phone. this quote recognizes the ability of technology to make us hyperfocus and forget the important things. for me, this has been diminishing the amount of time i could spend getting to know others or developing my https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ combs 3 understanding of the world. at the start of the semester, i wrote about how i gave up tik tok and instagram for new years. i can proudly state i still have tik tok deleted and have spent much more time with those around me. i hope this trend will continue throughout college. another aspect of my life that is heavily influenced by my mission statement are my friendships. more specifically, who i choose to spend my time with. in a way, my friendships have always been guided by a compassionate mindset. however, college has provided a fresh start where i have to make these choices again. the week six integration covered dr. jihoon kim as he stated, “the doctor told me i would not be able to walk for the rest of my life, and that was like a death sentence to me. i wanted to end my life” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). disabling events are life-changing for anyone because of the physical weaknesses they will now face. however, the social consequences are just as large and go widely unrecognized. in middle school, i was friends with a kid who needed a wheelchair. he was bullied for it and while i never stood up in a physical altercation, i was there for him as support in tough times. in college, i want to keep the mentality that allowed me to build these relationships and understand those who haven’t been as fortunate. those with disabilities are not the only ones who could use a friend who understands them during difficult times. jacob walsh described his friend’s reaction to coming out as a gay catholic when he said, “‘wow, thanks for telling me,’ he said after a minute. ‘do you want to talk about it?’ the knot in my stomach untied, and i let go of the steering wheel. when we got out of the car more than an hour later, we were both laughing and wiping tears from our eyes” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). he faced an unimaginable struggle surrounding his sexuality and a fear of the reactions of those around him. i am from omaha, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ combs 4 nebraska which can better be described as a city in a sea of cornfields. homophobia was not uncommon to hear at my all-boys catholic school and i imagine there were plenty of students who struggled from their environment alone. i had a friend who came out to me. he wasn’t catholic but he faced the same struggles jacob describes here. to me, my mission of honesty and understanding doubles as a mission to comfort and support. i want to remember these values in every interaction throughout college. i want to support those who need support. some problems are too large to be fixed by any single individual. i am not demoralized by that fact. in fact, this strengthens my mission to support those negatively impacted by a problem beyond their control. dean g. marcus cole described his reaction to a racially motivated assault of his father as he stated, “it would be one thing if i could have been assured then, or even now, that such a thing could never happen again. my own experience proves that it can” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). dean g. marcus cole experienced something i am unlikely to experience in my life solely because of the color of his skin. there are parts of life that are unfair but events like these remind me of my mission. this quote ties in well with a quote from fr. hesburgh as he stated “it wasn’t how i expected to serve, but i was serving my country in my own way” (“hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i can’t fix every problem but i can help make the aftermath just a little better. i can serve the world in my own way. i can’t experience these things but i can try to understand and be there when my friends face similar struggles. solidarity is born through understanding. during the week 5 assignment, my mom described me as “having a passion for helping others”(mom moreau fye week five). this idea is carried into my mission statement through https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 combs 5 the solidarity i want to build. i want to understand people and build those relationships. the career i land in will be one where i can work with others as my friends. i consider myself a friend and i believe that “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau family center for career development moreau fye week four). if i don’t allow myself to work in an environment that caters to my goals of understanding and my desire to be around others i will eventually hit a wall. i enjoy academics (to an extent) but i want my next three years to be working towards something i will enjoy. i am going to keep these goals and topics in mind as i choose the direction i pursue in my career. in my academic career, the largest influence of my mission statement comes from my pursuit of honesty. i pursue honesty from myself in my beliefs and assertions in hope it will spur honesty from others. the risk of forgetting honesty was highlighted by dr. paul blaschko when he stated, “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). dr. paul blaschko described the risks of losing open communication with a group. a “bubble” of people can quickly lose their way. echo chambers can lead to misinformation or the development of toxic beliefs. if a person lives in isolation and is told one belief is true, the lack of contradiction will lead him to believe it is true. an environment defined by an open and calm dialogue avoids these risks. i want to help sculpt this environment in my career and education. my mission statement is something that has subconsciously guided me throughout my childhood. as i traverse the next three years of my life and begin planning a future i wish to keep https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s combs 6 pursuing understanding and honesty in every aspect of my life. i will be a great friend and one day an even better father. week 14 capstone integration kelly harrington moreau fys 10102 51 29 april 2022 what it means to live my mission is to live, because there is more to life than simply surviving. to live is to connect with the world around me, both giving and receiving as i influence and am influenced by the environment around me. despite what the world may throw at me, the fight to improve what i have been given so that i may leave it better than i found it is one that i have decided to fight (moreau fye week thirteen). while this life of mine may be marked by death, i will spend the time i have using it to focus on living a good life rather than getting through a list of achievements to mark milestones in my life. keeping in mind that i only have a limited amount of time left might make me think that it is more important to experience what others get to have, but to focus so hard on hitting socially conventional markers like getting married or creating a family so that i lose sight of what is truly important is the last thing i want to do and why remembering that every moment counts is so important. summarized nicely: “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). thinking of my life as a whole and staying flexible is something that i need to keep in mind these next few years even as i plan out every class i might take for the rest of my education here at notre dame. plans change and even if i hit a few set-acks, it is okay as i can adjust and respond accordingly. sticking stubbornly to a plan i made way back when can only hurt me as “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). staying flexible and open to the possibilities that life may bring me will allow me to connect to the world and avoid burrowing down until all that i know consists of just myself and my fears. raised to believe that god is the highest power in life, my endeavours with religion have left me oftentimes confused but even within these struggles, i have been able to determine that the highest goods in life come from people, whether or not the divine is acting through them. inspired by people like father ted hesburgh, “the conscience of the country on civil rights,” i hope to do my part in upholding a legacy of doing good in the world both as an alumni of notre https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ dame but also as a human being who recognizes the need for equality (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and crhistine o’malley moreau fye week two). for me, this starts with this summer in my summer service learning immersion in ohio at a camp for children and adults with disabilities. during my service there i hope to remember and live the tenets of catholic social teachings and follow the accompaniment model. “in the accompaniment model, we’re in this together; we’re implicated as partners in the mix, sharing in the complexity and chaos of each other’s lives.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). through this mindset, i hope to grow and learn alongside the people i meet rather than with the mindset of helping them as only through humbling myself and looking through the lens of mutualism can i truly connect with others. with this in mind, i acknowledge that “there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them.” (“constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross” by the congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week twelve). this summer i hope to do my best to be mindful of the privileges that i have and do my best in whatever capacity possible. that being said, i hope that i will be able to forgive myself when i slip up and inevitably make a mistake as at the end of the day, we should only “focus what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet,” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). among these goods is love, and the intimacy and inherent pureness that can be found within connection to other human beings. strong, healthy relationships based in mutual respect and trust are characteristic of a fulfilling life. with a life well-lived in this manner comes the ability to embrace humanity and grow in wisdom. keeping in mind the mindset of mutual understanding mentioned earlier, there is a real need to address the many issues that can be found in society around us. while there are other important things in life like sending people to space and learning the history of the rocks we live on, “how wonderful would it be, while we discover faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). this need to connect with others can result in fulfilling relationships when we open ourselves up to others and make ourselves vulnerable. i hope to foster these relationships not only through the friendships found while at school but also out in the real world as i do my best to right what wrongs i see. as a female, queer person of color hoping to work in a traditionally male-dominated industry, i hope to balance out the inequities i see by mentoring those like me who may no have the opportunities that i had whether that be by mentoring a grade school robotics team or putting myself out there to reach out to young girls and sharing my experiences. an issue i’d like to address in particular is racism, as its effects have been felt nationwide over the past few years on a larger scale than usual. “because race is constructed as residing in people of color, whites don’t bear the social burden of race” but i hope to do my best to address the issue by amplifying the voices of other https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript people of color as i have the privilege to do so (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). in addition to this, i hope to make my voice heard by doing my civil duty as someone who can now vote as well as continuing to email and reach out to my representatives. with all this in mind, i hope to improve myself as a person including taking better care of myself. i struggle to not be overly self-critical and need to be reminded that i need to be kinder to myself and am often taken off guard when told that i am perceived differently by others than i perceive myself (moreau fye week five). along with being self-aware of my needs, i need to actually take steps to address them even if it is as simple as limiting my screen time when possible as “it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call” but i often feel drained for much longer as an introverted person who struggles with their mental health. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). curating the information that i receive when i am online is also a huge factor to my mental health that i have found very helpful when i am able to spare the energy to do so as it is so important to “be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blashko moreau fye week eleven). all in all, i hope to continue what steps i have been taking to better myself and the world around me as well as gradually escalate those efforts. as i have concluded in my first integration this semester, if i can end my life having regrets but well-lived by my own standards, having found my people and my place in the world, i can die content and with nothing more i could ask for (moreau fye week eight). to grow in wisdom is to open myself to the knowledge that i do not know much. only then with the humility that comes from this knowledge can i truly be receptive to the teachings of others. this humility also allows me to understand others better and with this understanding comes the basis for empathy which is essential in embracing humanity and respecting the inherent dignity of others. i hope that i will be able to take these qualities and knowledge to act with courage to better the world along with myself to the best of my ability so that i am able to realize my responsibility to not only myself but those around me. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd you only live once discerning what a life well-lived consists of is certainly difficult given that i have so much of my life awaiting. however, i have come to realize that i define a life well-lived as one that is rooted in relations of love; a life well-lived is a life that makes an impact on others and promotes happiness, peace, and compassion. i have determined that these factors are important in a meaningful life through interactions i have had with others, figures in my life i look to for inspiration, and through mindfulness practices that allow me insight on my own life. the first person that comes to my mind when i think of someone who has a life welllived is father boyle. his immense compassion and selflessness for others is astounding, and i strive to live my life like him. i admire how he is willing to help anyone and everyone no matter their background or identity. i can tell that he treats each person that crosses his path as family, and i know that he makes a big impact in the lives of many by “bridging the gulf of mutual judgment and replacing it with kinship” ("tattoos on the heart" by father greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). each person is created in god’s image and deserves to be celebrated for their own unique abilities and talents, and i strive to promote connectedness and respect in my everyday life. in addition to father boyle, i appreciate pope francis’s words about connectivity and how we can only build the future by being inclusive and standing together ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). i truly believe the highest form of happiness is achieved through relations with others, since after all, connection with others is part of what makes us human. at notre dame, i strive to develop meaningful relations with others in my day-to-day life, even if it is by simply getting lunch with someone. i also strive to promote social inclusion and equality by attending forums and conferences that educate me on what it means to stand in solidarity and address discrimination. file:///c:/users/blair/downloads/_tattoos%20on%20the%20heart_%20-%20chapter%208_%20jurisdiction%20(1)%20(1).pdf https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript i hope to continue to build relationships beyond college in my future career. a career can be such a defining factor in one’s life, and it is important that my career has a positive impact on others. i liked how the career center acknowledged that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip,” ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week four) and it involves a lot of exploration and personal reflection. although i know that i want to be a doctor, i still recognize that this decision is a lifelong process. it takes significant discernment to identity values, interests, personality traits, and skills, and how you can combine them into a career. additionally, i valued father michael himes’s key questions in order to gather more insight into my goals and aspirations in life ("three key questions" by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). i often find myself doing things because of societal expectations of success, but i am striving to focus on activities and topics that i am passionate about and receive joy from. as sister aletheia discussed, we must live our life to its fullest and cherish each moment and live authentically. i appreciate the idea of “memento mori: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” because it reminds me to create meaning in my life every day ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). living a meaningful life means doing something that brings more happiness into the world, and i greatly admire how my mother has used her career as a doctor to make impacts on others through her time with doctors without borders. i hope to follow in a similar path and help others who do not have access to adequate healthcare. i chose to have a conversation with her about my strengths and values and how i can use them to make a positive impact (moreau fye week five). we discussed how i really value unconditional love and kindness, and we discussed my desire for a more caring world that is respectful towards people’s different cultures, beliefs, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html and identities. we also talked about how my education will hopefully grant me even more skills to address issues in the world and take action just as the domer dozen have. i admire the work of the domer dozen, and they serve as a reminder of ways to use a notre dame education for good. for instance, i appreciate the work of tia b. paulette, who represents wrongfully convicted clients ("domer dozen" by notre dame – moreau fye week two). she is an excellent example of a life well-lived, since she uses her skills as a lawyer to help those from wrongfully being accused. i hope to one day be able to leave a mark and be just as impactful as the alumni that have gone before me. while i believe outward connection with others and helping others through love and compassion is a defining factor of a life well-lived, i also believe a life well-lived stems from within; it is ultimately a sense of self-awareness and self-understanding that is a catalyst for a positive outward impact in the world. the qualities most critical for success in today’s world “including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication, and collaboration all stem from self-awareness” ("the right way to be introspective" by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). throughout this semester, one of the ways that i have found most valuable for gaining deeper knowledge of myself, as well as inner peace and happiness, has been mindfulness. we only have one life, and in order to make the best of it, sometimes we must slow down and reflect. there is abundant scientific evidence demonstrating the physical and mental health benefits of taking a moment to be still and mediate ("why we need to slow down our life" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). as a student at notre dame, this has been difficult, but i have found that when i take just five minutes to meditate, i feel more calmness and clarity. i think it is important to maintain a balance between staying curious about myself, but also allowing myself to move on from the past. i have utilized not only meditation, but also https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ other mindfulness exercises such as journaling and yoga as a way to learn more about myself. i also appreciated dr. kim’s advice of thinking about the little things we have to be grateful for each day and appreciating the beauty of what we have been granted in life by god ("5 minutes" by grotto – moreau fye week six). overall, i believe a life well-lived is about taking the gifts and strengths one has and using them to make a positive impact in the world and not being complacent with inequalities and injustices. while living a life well-lived does not necessarily mean doing something momentous or winning a nobel peace prize, it does involve actively striving to promote love and kindness for all. at notre dame i aim to brighten people’s day around me, as well as help those in the greater south bend community through volunteering. after i graduate, i hope to take the new skills i have gained during my time here and utilize them in my career and by serving others. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 finding the way what is a life well-lived if it is without end? we are gathered here today at the close of jack’s life. the close. the end to a long journey that must end. but let us not mourn the loss of life, because what is a life well-lived if it is without end? we make decisions about our careers, friends, and hobbies based on the knowledge that one day it will all end, and we want to make the most of that short section in time that we call home. all of you know this, but jack made the most of his section. jack once told me a story about his first encounter with death when he was four years old. he sat in a chair at the fedex office in his hometown of ashburn, bored as his mother argued with the worker about god knows what. to appease jack’s boredom, his mother handed him her flip phone so that he could push the buttons around. jack stumbled upon the calendar app and began scrolling through time. he got to the year 2103 and realized that would be 100 years from the day of his birth. jack, being exceptional for kids his age, knew that most people don’t make it to 100 and that he had passed his death date in the calendar. it got him thinking. he had just scrolled through his entire life, his entire being, all of jack. those days were numbered, finite, limited. he wanted to know how he could make the most of that time on earth, and i believe he did just that. thinking, it’s all jack did sometimes. when jack was a junior in high school, his entire world slowed down to meet the demands of covid-19. suddenly, the test on inertia and centrifugation he had the next day no longer mattered. the world was put on pause and jack had been given his ultimate gift, time. time to start thinking about time. as pico iyer said, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) jack had an epiphany one night in the bathtub during covid. he fell asleep after being submerged for over an hour. when he went to sleep, the water was warm, when he awoke it had turned cold. he thought https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ about this idea of water turning cold. the bath had been considerably less enjoyable now that it was cold. he realized that we must take advantage of the present, before the water turns cold and our time is up. jack seized the opportunity to grow and began working on the next chapter of his life, his time at notre dame. for those of you who knew jack, you know how much he loved notre dame. even before he applied, was admitted, and enrolled, it was his school. that is, in large part, because he found his home at notre dame. he clicked with his friends right away. he was challenged successfully by the course load. but most importantly, he believed in notre dame’s message. every notre dame alumni knows the name i am about to say, but let me give context for those who don’t. father ted hesburgh was a beloved priest and president of notre dame. he promoted strong virtues in engaging with the world around us and bringing out the best in one another. in the documentary about his life, jack found comfort in one particular quote: “at the end of the day, we all liked to fish.” (“hesburgh video” by hesburgh moreau fye week two). see, finding common ground was one of jack’s strong suits. maybe it was his natural fear of having others dislike him or his willingness to see beyond grudges, but he genuinely wanted to be everyone’s friend. and it seems it worked as there were many friends and family members gathered around to honor his name. in his philosophy classes at notre dame, he was known as the mediator. during his classes' most heated debates, he reminded everyone that passion is not poison and should be cherished but not at the expense of relationships with one another. with that, he brought others together. death is what gives life meaning, but to live a good life is what gives death meaning. jack’s death was meaningful. thinking back to sister aletheia, “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) jack knew from a young age that he was headed towards greatness, but he didn’t want to take an orthodox route. after college, he delayed his employment for a year and became a ski instructor in the colorado rockies, a time where he found peace with himself. there, he met some of his best friends, a brotherhood they continued on until the day jack died. with his new group, jack would go fishing, hiking, and skiing – three of his favorite things to do. jack believed that nature healed and we should spend as much time as possible with it. from there, jack entered his careerdom. he worked at boston dynamics while attending harvard law at night. it was tough. for those of you who knew jack during this time, you know this was the hardest point in his life. he was overworked and underslept for three years, but he would tell you how much he loved every minute of it. the thrill of pursuing one’s own interests in congruence with deepening their education is admirable. jack became interested in pursuing law after talking with one of his father’s friends, bill. he learned so much by talking to him that it ultimately changed his life course, the good, the bad, and the ugly (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). jack loved what he did because he made sure it was the right fit for him before committing to it. i think all of us should view jack’s life as a challenge for ourselves. why shouldn’t we do what we want to do and be who we want to be? at the end of the day, we all end up six feet under and yet it is the life we live before that end that makes our lives purposeful. jack began that conversation of discernment while studying at notre dame. during an electrical engineering alumni panel, jack began contacting a mentor named sarah devitt (week five discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5). sarah provided jack with the necessary tools to succeed as an electrical engineer, and her father, bill, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ gave jack the advice to succeed as a lawyer. jack realized that it is important to have mentors. they give us strength when we lack it and confidence when we need it. we can lean on them and they can pull us up to where we need to be. jack was a very spiritual person. he believed that his faith in the lord and a firm commitment to the gospel is what gave life its ultimate meaning. originally brought up catholic, jack’s family left the catholic church when he was ten years old. he went to a non-denominational church for the next eight years until attending notre dame. jack wanted to attend a faith-based university that was also academically rigorous, and notre dame fit the bill. jack believed that a faith-based college experience would improve his mindfulness and attitude towards serving others. at notre dame, he picked up a habit that he carried with him until the day he died: meditation (“mindfulness menu” mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six). a simple fifteen minutes of peace and tranquility at the beginning of each day gave jack the insight and perspective he needed to be mindful of his actions. he would reset his emotions during that meditative period and aim his efforts towards being a friend to all and a helping hand to others, because a life well-lived is one that brings about positive change to others. speaking of bringing about positive change, jack must have had an impact on all of you for showing up. jack’s worst fear, albeit irrational, was no one showing up to his funeral to say goodbye. i know he is looking down from heaven, appreciating each and every one of you. so let’s carry on his legacy by supporting others, positively affecting others, and being mindful of others’ situations. as pope francis once said, “ in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by ted moreau fye week seven) be courageous. be bold. be brave enough to be who you are, https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript as jack was who he was. how different would the world look if everyone supported others instead of knocking each other down? how might our daily life look different? jack would say that we would all be more united and accepting. so let’s do just that. jack’s experiences with life were special. the memories that he imprinted will live far beyond his death. and let us all take up the challenge to live a life well-lived, a life that we want to live, a life aimed towards serving others, as jack would have wanted. so leave this service not in a state of sorrow, but in hope. go and live your life, it is what jack would have wanted. because we are gathered here today at the close of jack’s life. the close. the end to a long journey that must end. but let us not mourn the loss of life, because what is a life well-lived if it is without end? kelton castillo apr 29, 2022 me and my time at notre dame i have learned so much about myself during my first year here at notre dame. my moreau first-year experience course played a big part in my road to figuring out who i am and what i want to do with my life in several ways. for instance, through the set of qqc’s that focused on reflection as on how to live a life well-lived, i learned that i am a very goal-driven person. i define how good my life is being lived based on my level of success, and that’s something that i never gave much thought to until moreau’s first-year experience.another example of how helpful moreau was are the qqc’s that focused on careers and what we wanted to do with our life. due to that, i was able to discern what it is that i want to do with the rest of my life, i even reflected on whether my current major was right for me. drafting my mission statement was a bit difficult for me at first because i didn’t know how to start it or what to say in it. however, i ended up with a pretty good first mission statement that i have been proud to say has been updated since the last time i revised it. my new mission statement reads, “kc is a very outgoing person that’s driven by his values and goals. during the fall semester, kc came in motivated and excited to see what the future held for him at the university of notre dame. still, with his goals and values in mind, kc persevered throughout the fall semester and tried to keep persevering throughout the spring semester. due to being in a new environment and reflecting on how life was going and where he wanted to be, the values and goals that kc came to college with slightly changed/improved. that’s because kc set new goals for himself after meeting his previous goals. writing his eulogy was a fun experience that helped him realize that the day he has to write his actual speech he’ll probably just make jokes throughout all of it. or, on the other hand, he’ll probably procrastinate and not write one at all. one thing that kc knows for certain, is that whatever path he chooses he’ll maintain his faith and connection with god. from a young age kc was told that whatever he does, to keep god at the center of it. to pray to god in the god and in the bad because he can get you through the worse storm, but you also have to thank him for protecting you throughout the journey. kc’s connection with god is his own and it’s a good one according to himself. god loves me and i love him. i’m happy because of him and i have learned to see the lessons in the hardships. i trust in god as he trusts in me. to me, kc, success can have several looks, but the way i see me being successful is by being happy and financially stable. succes to kc means breaking generational chains, no longer living paycheck to paycheck like his parents. it means traveling and being able to see the world. it means being happy doing whatever job he has, because at that point the job will practically be a hobby. it means starting a family and having a good support group. it means to be living my best life and having good company by my side. to me, kc, succes is not a dream, success is something that i am destined for! this newly revised mission statement was made possible by all my qqc’s. for isnstance, the very first qqc we did this semester asked us about “what life am i living?”. and that question hit hard because is not everyday that i sit back and reflect on my life, but i had to for the assignment and i’m glad i did. sometimes i feel as though i am living multiple lives, or that my life is not in my control.what do i do when i feel like i’ve lost control of my life? well, why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer states,one of our week 1 readings, reads, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture”. this is significant to me because that’s what i try to do. i try my best to take things slow and think about what is important to me. someone that made me reflect on my life and what has inspired my life decisions or the worth of my life is father hesburgh. after watching the film for week 2 of moreau, i began to think about what might inspired a life well lived for me. the hesburgh film was really emotional and inspiring for me, seeing father hesburgh live his life and all he accomplished was truly amazing. seeing him stick to his belief and being himself no matter what was inspiring and that’s something that i aspire to do. week 3 of moreau send me on a search frenzied, an internal search frenzied at that. the focus question for that week being, “what questions guide a life well-lived?” whats the jump starter for all my questions. as little kids we question everything, always asking why this and why that, and we continue to do this even as adults. however, the questions become more complex. like what am i doing with my life and why am i doing it? where am i supposed to be? i feel as those particular questions are the questions that guide a well-lived life. an excerpt from the text/audio, meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die , by ruth graham, a week 3 reading, reads, “that is because since 2017, she has made it her mission to revive the practice of memento mori, a latin phrase meaning "remember your death." the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future. it can seem radical in an era in which death until very recently has become easy to ignore”. this spoke to me because i try to emphasize to others and myself that stressing about the past doesn't do any good to you. you can’t let life pass you by, you have to live in the present, and keep in mind your future. that also connects to week 4 and what we might do to lead a good life. for instance, a line from navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development, a week 4 reading, that really spoke to me reads, “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible”. you have to look within yourself and know your skills, then start to think about possible pathways that will allow you to use your skills on your everyday life. become successful doing what you already know what to do. throughout my time here at notre dame i not only had to think about how i perceived myself, but also had to think about how others perceive me. this has been a hardtopic for me because although i think i’m a good person, everyone else might not think so. and yes, ii know you can’t please everyone, but i don’t like being on noone’s bad side. for week 5’s discernment conversation i talked to daymine snow and this is how the conversation went. me: “what do you think i most value and desire in life? why?” daymine: “other people happiness because you would sacrifice your own happiness for others” me: “what issues are important to me? or, what do you think i want to change in the world?” daymine: “your invested in helping the upcoming generations and working with kids” this conversation highlights how much i value my relationships with others, so being perceived in a bad way is truly hurtful. i am joke and say i identify as an apple because humans are just not it sometimes. but at the end of the day, i am still human which means i make mistakes, even if unconsciusly. so when we got to week 6 and we were asked, “what are personal obstacles to living a life well-lived and how do i respond?” i immediately reflected on week 5. one of the obstacles that stop me is that i care too much about what people might think of me. i do a lot of self reflection and try to find the best ways to deal with my issues by myself because i feel like i am the only person that understands me. a quote from the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha euric, a week 6 reading, that really spoke to me reads, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started”. this really stood out to me because it illustrates how no matter how much self reflection you do at times it can be pointless. but what can i do? if i can’t help myself, who do i go to for help? who can i trust when everyone that i have placed trust on has hurt me or can’t relate to my struggles? i don’t have the best responses to my problems, but the system is extremely corrupted and aside from god, i’m all i got. going into week 7 what i had said in week 6 is immediately contradicted by pope francis in why the only future worth building includes everyone , a video that we had to watch for that week. something that the pope said that stuck with me reads, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component”. which means that we should strive to reach internal happiness but we must also try to help others reach happiness. it feels good to be good and do good. and i truly believe that my purpose in life is to spread joy to others. although i identify as an apple, we still share humanity as a common trait. “the people i had so earnestly come to serve (and whose lives i had imagined transforming) had to take care of me. i wept, partly from the illness, but mostly out of frustration at how little the vision of me sick in bed resembled the one in my head of an autonomous me helping the needy them. that equation had been flipped”. this quote from, teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together , a week 9 reading by professor steve reifenberg, really stood out to me because it highlighted how the people helped a complete stranger, they saw him in pain and although they didn’t know him they empathize with him and helped him. all those qqc’s helped me grow as an individual, they made me wiser, no punintented to week 11 focus question, which is, “how do i become wise?”. but i feel as though i grew a lot throughout this school year and for that i am grateful, i have a better understanding of things that i once didn’t understand. i have a new and better mission statement and my goals are clear to me. so, i’ll close with one of my favorite quotes, ““your story may not have such a happy beginning but that does not make you who you are, it is the rest of itwho you choose to be”(the soothsayer from kung fu panda 2). the essence of ellie we’re gathered together today to celebrate ellie’s life and the legacy she left behind her. while each and every one of us may have had different experiences with ellie, we all cherished her in our own unique way. no matter how seemingly insignificant your first or last encounter with her was. our lives are built on the experiences we share with one another, and not on the principle of time passing; because without the relationships we formed with ellie with each other, time itself has no meaning. i’d like to preface this by asking you all to sit on this question as i speak, and think on your response: what was the essence of ellie to you, and how can her life inspire you to lead a better life of your own (“three key questions” fr. michael hines moreau fye week three)? when i first met ellie, the first thing i came to realize quickly was her love of music. although by no means was she a gifted singer, even though she constantly was singing or whistling, she was absolutely infatuated by music. jazz for when she studied, classical for reading, oldies for cooking, you name it: ellie had a soundtrack to her life, and her character embodied the joy and brightness of the music loved so dearly. after putting much thought into it, i selected a song that i believe best captures ellie in all of her dimensions: ‘vienna’ by billy joel. i’ll do my best to describe the song for those who don’t know them, but i believe that this song beautifully represents the energy that ellie put forth into the universe during her lifetime. and, just as songs provide lasting memories, sources of inspiration and joy, and leave an impact on their audience, ellie led a lifetime that did the same (“address at the respect for life mass” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). before doing that, however, i’d like to stop and outline the larger milestones along ellie’s lifetime, and highlight her accomplishments and values that were important to her. i can’t answer this question for ellie, but if i were to answer the proposition, what do i want to be remembered for, and how did i lead a life well lived? a couple of things come to mind: above all, i believe that ellie should be remembered for her heart and humor, two things she put into every endeavor entirely. the word awkward did not exist in her vocabulary, and i do truly mean that; no matter the situation, for better or worse ellie had a line of jokes waiting to be made to brighten the mood or ease the tension. i’m sure that everyone here can recall a story (or maybe conflict!) involving her wit and lip. and of course not every joke landed, which is to be expected when you never stop making them, but her determination to spark laughter in every conversation always served as a reminder to be the positive light in your life, and the lives of those around you (“the power of vulnerability” by brene brown moreau fye week one). every sailor needs a lighthouse to keep them afloat, and ellie made it her mission to uplift those around her at every opportunity with laughter, which is an achievement i know she was extremely proud of. even in her own life, ellie’s positivity remained unaffected even when she was met with significant obstacles she’d needed to overcome. if a near death experience and traumatic brain injury couldn’t slow down her perpetual stand up act, i’m not sure anything could (“5 minutes” by the grotto moreau fye week six). alongside ellie’s humor was her heart, and i believe she was the embodiment of the sentiment shared in mother theresa’s assertion to “spread love everywhere you go. let no one ever come to you without leaving happier” (mother theresa moreau fye week seven). the relationships she shared with her friends and family were truly what she valued most in life. the most important relationship in her life was undoubtedly with her father sean, who was her lifelong inspiration and shared her passions for building relationships and seeking opportunities for charity. everything she ever did was with her father in mind, whether it was with life-changing decisions such as choosing a career path that sparked the same fire within her that sean’s did with him, or the more mundane things like seeking opportunities to give back to the community around her in any way she could (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). sean and ellie both shared an intensity and drive that they used to lead a life that brought joy not only to themselves but those around them, and the accomplishments ellie achieved during her lifetime certainly underscore this. during her career as an engineer, ellie dedicated her efforts to science and forward progress with technological advancements, but what she was much more proud of was her work in education and volunteering for educational outreach programs (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” by merulo development center moreau fye week four). her tutoring program, something she’d been wanting to start since she was 15 and first began working as a volunteer math tutor working in spanish in annapolis, is an embodiment of ellie’s passion for building relationships and extending her jurisdiction to include those who could benefit from being given educational opportunities they would otherwise not have access to (tattoos on the heart by greg boyle moreau fye week seven). and in both her professional career and volunteer interests, it’s easy to discern what ellie valued most in life, because those were the things she put her entire spirit into pursuing, which is something that we all should reflect on in our own lives. beyond optimism lies joy, and the only way that we can achieve joy like ellie did is to go into life with open arms, welcoming challenges and exploring opportunities until we find whatever that thing is that makes time go away and nothing else matters. i’d like to end today by looking back to the song i had mentioned at the beginning of the eulogy, “vienna” by billy joel, and read some lyrics that capture the essence of ellie: “you’ve got your passion, “you’ve got your pride, but don’t you know that only fools are satisfied? dream on but don’t imagine they’ll all come true.” her presence may be gone but her spirit continues to shine through. microsoft word integration 3.docx eulogy integration 3 moreau first year experience march 4, 2022 life emily’s way and how to do it yourself it is not often that someone is able to write their own eulogy and reflect on their life. eulogies typically chronical accomplishments, memories, and general reflections on who the person that passed away was. i hope to also integrate my philosophy for life and the messages i would like to share as the rest of you continue the life, i was so lucky to be a part of. my first memory of eulogies and my inspiration for this comes from 2012 when my grandfather passed away and my mom was invited to give his eulogy. music was important to him, so my mom worked hard to craft a eulogy that’s structure even reflected my grandfather. she talked about the music important to him pausing at different points in her talk to play different segments of songs. ironically, i have taken such a positive and creative view on eulogies from this. i learned to see the beauty in death and the joy in an opportunity to celebrate the entirety of someone’s life that cannot be fully experienced while they are alive. following much of the same view as famous sister aletheia, i would hope each one of you finds the same peace in an inevitable end (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i chose to look at life’s flexible and unpredictable nature as freedom from permanency or deep failure because you can always pivot. i certainly took each opportunity to make a big decision seriously as many of you listened to hours of college decisions, major discernment, and job changes over my life because they presented me with the opportunity to become a truer version of myself and live a more impactful life. unpredictability and inevitable death invited me to seize every opportunity weather it was the impulsive get-togethers with friends and family i will be remembered for or chaotic drawnout conversations overthinking each decision. i wanted to make the most of life, and i am proud to say i did. i never let myself stay in one place moving from seattle to indiana for college and bouncing from the midwest, west coast, and east coast until finally finding one home just in time to start my family. i took the time to talk with others who knew me best or knew my goals because it was important for me to have a plan as i made any changes in life(“week five discernment conversation activity document” by moreau fye instructors – moreau fye week 5). i wanted to follow a process of looking at my strengths, what inspired me and how i could apply that to new goals (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). i was the chronic list maker, “let’s write this down” and expectations setter in personal and group settings. i wanted to make sure i was sensitive to the way my changes or action plans would impact others and as a leader i wanted to ensure each person was included. i was known as a transparent leader who knew what i wanted and how my values connected to my pursuits. i always strove to embody fr. hesburgh of notre dame, not just because i loved the school and notre dame football so much, but because of what fr. hesburgh stood for and accomplished in this life. yes, i am admittedly very happy to say i will be remembered for my love of notre dame and the chronic colleran family obsession with notre dame football. you can’t tell me my dad and i won’t be having the time of our lives watching every notre dame game together from now on. back to fr. hesburgh though, he knew from a young age that service to god and others for god was a part of his calling. he never waned from his convictions and didn’t let the complications of life pull him away from that goal (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). it is no mistake he is still remembered so vividly and lovingly. my goal was always to be a person present to and loving others. i was seldom alone, and i treasured time with others more than anything. i committed myself to my friends from those of you who knew me in seattle, at notre dame and beyond. i tried my best to not lose touch when i found so much love for you. family was an equally important love. my husband and our children were my everything and my pride and compassion never waned. i loved my relatives, parents and brother joe as we all grew, and never stopped talking with them. friends and family, i love you all so much, and i excited to keep showing up to you even if i am a quieter presence now. keep seeing each one of your family members who are still around and continue to enter your life. i hope i instilled the importance of family and friends as your everything. like fr. boyle and pope francis often remarked we are much more alike than different and the common humanity we each hold should bring each of you closer together (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. gregory boyle and “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). love drove my relationships, and it should with yours as well. the simpler you view your inherent connection to others and more deeply you see your love for them, the easier it can be to create such a large network of love and joy. i attribute gratitude to a significant part of the joy, calm and success of my life. it was not an easy journey for me to find this gratitude and prayer, but once i discovered their power, i was able to overcome any set back and grow more into the person i strove to be. after finding myself lost and depressed senior year of high school and happier than i could describe freshman year of college, i knew gratitude would be the key to transforming my life and maintaining such positivity and kindness toward myself and others. each day i would walk around notre dame’s campus and find myself incredibly thankful for where i had ended up. in just three months, i completely transformed the person i was internally. i rediscovered my love for school, healthy friendships, renewed self-confidence, a true relationship with my parents and so much more because i understood the value in each of these aspects in life. i had spent years taking for granted my even keel nature and ability to compartmentalize issues that i let things build up and spent too long finding flaws. this is not a story about why i struggled, and i still don’t fully know what led me to the place i was senior year of high school, but i know waking up every day in awe of the life i got to live that first year at notre dame changed me. i never let that excitement and gratitude disappear. i wouldn’t let it because i actually learned there was always something to be thankful for. dr. kim and the grotto network talk very candidly about the impact fullness of a simple few moments of gratitude each day. dr. kim laments human tendency to see gratitude and prayer as something that needs to take up extensive time during the day or follow a long process when really any moment of calm can become a time to pray and give thanks (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). it took me a few years to learn this but realizing that a simple walk or dive somewhere could be my time to pray and thank god changed much of who i was and the way i saw life. kevin kelly also touched on the phenomenon of gratitude because it grounds us in ourselves. he saw gratitude as a way to define your life and dreams beyond the business of life and constant stimulation of technology in today’s world (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). my moments walking across campus my first year disconnected me from my phone and other people’s ideas, worried and expectations to allow me to find myself and discover the themes in my prayers of thanks. i saw that my friends were important to me but so was my learning. this helped me continue to push myself in my jobs and endeavors because i discovered the importance of learning. it was often you could hear me talking about a new reading, class or job assignment that pushed my thinking and tested my skills. i learned many things, and even nerdy emily became her true self through my granitite each day. i hope i kept you all interested and happy. think about how big i am smiling right now and how much i would want to laugh with and hug each of you one last time. don’t make my passing a time to mourn and see this as a celebration of a life i know i lived well. if this church is anywhere near full, i will know i was successful in surrounding myself with people who i loved. you all made my life a “life well lived,” and i hope my examples can help make your life a “life well lived.” last integration kelly harrington capstone integration what i want to do with my life. i see every day as an opportunity to grow, learn and love others. i want to help myself and others get closer to god and grow to be the best version of themselves and myself with love. so that way, we can achieve the bigger picture of success: joy and happiness. (“mission statement” by moreau fye week 13) i believe that the connection of human beings can help us become better and have a better relationship with ourselves. that is why i try to push myself to search for options on how to help people, grow my wisdom of things i am not used to, and find real happiness with those things. for starters, if we want to know what we are dealing with in our lives, we first have to analyze what we have to deal with every day ourselves. sometimes we tend to ignore the fact that we have to know ourselves very well if we want to have the best performance in the presented situations. with this knowledge, we can change and develop new skills; we have to dive deep into ourselves to know the differences around us and use them in our favor. that is why, "it's precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break." ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, tedmoreau fye week 1). we are so busy with things around us that we forget to worry about ourselves—running around trying to get everything done and not thinking about how we feel, how we are doing, or how we live. being busy is one of our biggest distractions to think about activities around us, technology, work, chores, etc. we forget to sit down and think about ourselves, even though it is essential to reflect on ourselves to grow, be better, and achieve our highest potential. if we do this, we can be in a better position to do the things we want, and as father hesburg once said, "if you want to do something good, i think there is a lot of room here to do something good…. do something about it, its your country, it's your problem" ("hesburgh" -(produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley)moreau fye week 2 ) there are a lot of things that can be fixed where we are, but we will not be in the position of fixing them if we are not good with ourselves. if we find that space where we know ourselves, we can work to achieve what we want and fix those problems presented in our community or even the world. nevertheless, it is essential to be lenient with us because "introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended questions." ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich, ted conferences-moreau fye week 6). sometimes we can hurt ourselves with the time to analyze ourselves, so even though it is vital, we have to be careful about how we do it. adding to the development of oneself and the search for meaning in our person, it is essential to open our horizons and learn about things that are not common to our person. one example of how sometimes, we do not allow the situations around us to impact us is racism. "mainstream dictionary definitions reduce racism to individual racial prejudice and the intentional actions that result….but this definition does little to explain how racial hierarchies are consistently reproduced." ("why it's so hard to talk to white people about racism" by dr. robin d'angelomoreau fye week 10) it is very interesting how sometimes we go to the literal and leave behind so much in the meaning of something. we limitate ourselves to the words used to explain something when words are not enough to describe things. i think that embracing humanity and everything around us is just like that. we can not just assume something by watching or experiencing it once. we can not suppose how someone or something is or what they are worth by just the on top "meaning" of what they are. we need to go into deep analysis and embrace the whole "meaning" of the things and people around us. not allowing these situations or people that are different from us into our lives is trapping ourselves in an echo chamber, and as dr. paul blaschko says, "echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles." ("how to avoid an echo chamber" adapted from dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). an echo chamber is a place that you choose to be in. you decide to lock out any other information unrelated to the things in your chamber, other than a bubble that usually is a place you are without actually choosing to be there. this is dangerous because it can trap us in a cycle of only a couple of things, making us selfish and hurting us more than helping us. not building a concise and good way of thinking and just having one thing to think about blocks any chance of growth and development of ourselves. that is why it is important to not close ourselves to just what we believe but analyze those situations and people around us to have a good analysis of them, have a definite opinion, and not only a word-shallow definition. if we never give other people the opportunity to become someone in our lives, we would never have the opportunity to impact others and impact our community and the world. as a firm catholic, i believe that we are all brothers, and no matter where you are from or what you think in, everyone deserves an opportunity and respect. "as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them, we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them, we are made new by the same lord's love; like them, we hope for a world where justice and love prevail." ("constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross"from 2 mission, paragraph 12moreau fye week 12) sometimes it is hard to realize that we are all in this together. we are together on this trip called life, and even though we are all different, we all have problems, we all have sources of happiness, and we all have goals. sometimes we have to open our eyes and remember that we are not alone. as i mentioned above, we are all in this together. "as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people." i think that is inspirational, and i wish it would be easier to see and realize. in my own experience, notre dame has helped me to realize that you can find great relationships that could be life-changing in the places that you least expect them, but if you close yourself to those relationships, you would never know what could have been. we should have solidarity with everyone globally, not only with the people in our bubble but also in our echo chamber. we should help others to grow and find their true potential. "the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard." ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9) everyone has enormous potential, but sometimes it is hidden or blocked and needs help to be heard. it is crucial to help others, just as others may help us. we are continuing the talk about relationships. it is essential to generate relationships that can last forever. it is essential to search for ways to help those around us, love, and share happiness. the pope once said, "let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face. the "you" is always a real presence, a person to take care of." ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). we must appreciate others the way we appreciate ourselves. if we value ourselves, and know our worth, it is easier to see others as valuable people, and it is just like a state or a number as the quote says. that is why, we have to be creative, and give the close people in our lives a personal and intimate treatment, so they know we are there for them. i think that the best satisfaction in life is to help others, and i think that the best way to do that is with personal love, transmitted to others. achieving things is not worth anything if we do not have close people to share it with. like barney stinson, a character in the series "how i met your mother," says: "whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless your friends are there to see it." (how i met your mother season 9 episode 17: "sunrise") that is why it is crucial to search for the correct people and give them love and appreciation during our lives. lastly, i want to do everything mentioned above to search for and achieve happiness. achieve happiness and convert it to joy, so i can share it with those around me and find peace in my life. "joy…comes from within, and it's a genuine rightness of how one lives one's life." ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). that is why i want to achieve it. i know that with the help of the university of notre dame and its resources like the text "navigate your career" by the muruelo career center at the university of notre dame ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4) i know i can use my career to achieve what i am trying to and become the person i want to be. in conclusion, as i talked with a teacher that is now my friend ("reflection-discernment conversation activity" by and geovanni hernandez (my teacher) moreau fye week 5), i want to achieve joy and share it with others. i believe that a person's development is made so it can be a tool to help others and make the world a better place. here is notre dame; i know that i will develop my heart and mind to change the world and make it a better place. i have hope, and i am thankful that the course of moreau helped me to make me think about these things and try to have them present from now on in my daily life. bibliography: 1) ohara, chris. “whatever you do in this life, it's not legendary, unless ...” tv fanatics, 3 feb. 2014, https://www.tvfanatic.com/quotes/whatever-you-do-in-this-life-its-not-legendary-unless-y our-frien/. “what does the lord require of you, but to do justice, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your god?” micah 6:8. after almost a year of discovering myself and my values, i have come to the conclusion that this verse from scripture has become my personal mission statement for my short time at notre dame. i want every decision that i make, the big and small, to align with these three tasks that god has given me through this bible verse. justice is the belief that each person deserves fair treatment because of his inherent human dignity. the best way to bring about justice is to identify those places in our communities where people are not treated justly. the university’s mission statement identifies the institution’s duty to bring justice to the world through its promotion of the common good: “the university seeks to cultivate in its students not only an appreciation for the great achievements of human beings, but also a disciplined sensibility to the poverty, injustice, and oppression that burden the lives of so many. the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice” (“university of notre dame mission statement” moreau fye week thirteen). i have witnessed injustice in my own community in memphis, tennessee, where systematic racism has led to segregation and an endless cycle of poverty. memphians can identify the lines between poverty and affluence by just looking at a map of the city. it is not a coincidence that we associate poverty with blackness and affluence with whiteness. dr. robin d’angelo describes it best“the whiter our schools and neighborhoods are, the more likely they are to be seen as ‘good’” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost moreau fye week ten). the separation of where we live, work, and go to school is not something that we can just wish away. as dean g. marcus cole says, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it. this racial separation and violence will not end until we stop waiting for african-americans to enter our circles. each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school moreau fye week twelve). my school always made conscious efforts to expand our circle, giving scholarships to lower-income families, raising money for various organizations, and doing what it could for the community of memphis with the knowledge that education was the means by which one could exit the cycle of poverty. yet the separation of memphis could still be seen in our school: every morning since the sixth grade i’ve put on my st. mary's wig and my st. mary’s clothes, and my st. mary's voice in preparation for coming to school, and here i'm hannah… then at 3:15 when i would get in the car with my grandmother my life would suddenly go from this, to… what most other people would consider the ghetto. as we made our way to our home in orange mound, i would flip a switch, and suddenly, i was miley stewart. this was said in the senior speech of someone i went to highschool with. she went on to say, my biggest fear for a long time was allowing myself to be miley here. i was afraid i would be considered the “ghetto girl” or the “girl from the hood,” and i didnt wanna be seen that way… i still do both hannah and miley all the time, but it's different now than it was before. instead of switching back and forth between the different versions of myself i've combined them. and now i’m proud to say that i'm just me… the me where orange mound meets perkins extended. in a just world, there would be no separation between orange mound and perkins extended, between binghamton and chickasaw gardens, between frayser and hein park. in a just world, no one would have to feel the way that my fellow student did when the lines between neighborhoods were crossed. in a just world, low income families would be able to send their children to the jubilee schools shut down by the bishop. even after having left memphis for college, i still feel called to bring some sort of justice to my city. my math teacher felt this call, having returned from princeton to his hometown to pursue education, bringing it both to those who can afford it and those who cannot. working with his program this year allowed me to help one person in her pursuit of education, someone who i learned was completely alone in the world, who had no one else to advise her. i’d like to think that, through the hours i dedicated to her, even though i haven’t fixed the education system of memphis, i at least helped one person. i intend to continue helping my math teacher with this organization for the next three years to help the education system in the city of memphis. i also would like to extend my service to the south bend community as wellperhaps through depaul academy. i want the service that i do to be rooted in justice, in the belief that everyone deserves a chance in life to succeed. justice is something that cannot exist without mercy. in scripture, god’s desire to punish is almost always swayed by his desire to show mercy to those who ask it of him, whether it be for themselves or for others. when i think of mercy, i think of sonya from crime and punishment, a book about justice and mercy: “what have you done—what have you done to yourself?” she said in despair, and, jumping up, she flung herself on his neck, threw her arms round him, and held him tightly… “there is no one—no one in the whole world now so unhappy as you!” she cried in a frenzy, not hearing what he said, and she suddenly broke into violent hysterical weeping (fyodor dostoyevsky, crime and punishment). i have tried to live out this call to be merciful by holding onto the belief that everyone is redeemable, that everyone is capable of good“timshel,” as people say. the “hesburgh” film shows the meaning of mercy in the way it describes father ted hesburgh: “what made him such an extraordinary figure was that he really didn’t belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind” (“hesburgh,” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). because of mankind’s redeemability, it is our responsibility to show love and forgiveness to those who are difficult to love, to those who are unkind to us. we must turn the other cheek to those who cause us pain, as saint monica did for her husband. her mercy, her forgiveness, is eventually what instills love and kindness into her husband. saint augustine writes in his confessions, she tried to win him for you, speaking to him of you by her virtues through which you made her beautiful, so that her husband loved, respected and admired her. she bore with his infidelities and never had any quarrel with her husband on this account. for she looked forward to your mercy coming upon him, in hope that, as he came to believe in you, he might become chaste (confessions, 168). at the end when her husband had reached the end of his life in time, she succeeded in gaining him for you. after he was a baptized believer, she had no cause to complain of behaviour which she had tolerated in one not yet a believer (170). therefore, all our efforts at evangelization are realized when we show tenderness and compassion for others. pope francis describes tenderness as “the language of the young children, of those who need the other… this is tenderness: being on the same level as the other. god himself descended into jesus to be on our level… he lowered himself, he lived his entire human existence practicing the real, concrete language of love” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). being merciful to others means lowering ourselves to their level, meeting one another in all of our imperfections, and loving one another nevertheless. the belief that everyone is redeemable is also found in bringing justice to an unjust worldwe must do so with mercy and compassion. therefore, accompaniment is necessary to the virtue of mercy. in the words of professor steve reifenberg “...every major religious tradition – including islam, hinduism, judaism, buddhism, and christianity –has as a central concern of connecting our lives with those who are downtrodden, the victim, the widow, the orphan, the poor. the admonition is consistent across all traditions: look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). the virtue of mercy has an element of losing oneselfof treating others in a way that our inherent selfishness would cause us to be uninclined to treat them. at times we can be reluctant to give the benefit of the doubt to those with whom we disagree. we push out those who don’t think and look and act like us from our circles. in the words of dr. paul blaschko, “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). mercy calls us not to try to change the minds of others but to listen to them. it calls us to believe that good hearts are capable of holding hateful beliefs, and that in seeing others as good, in tolerating different opinions, in letting the outcast join the table, we can bring unity to a broken world. during my time here, i want to make a conscious effort to see the redeemability of every person. i want to try to never talk badly about anyone who has hurt me in my own perception of things, and instead pray for the people who have hurt me in the past and for those who will hurt me in the future. i want to be someone that others know will forgive them, allowing their character to develop instead of being held back by someone’s perception of them because of their past. finally, i want to be someone who shows mercy to herself, allowing myself to move on from my mistakes and move forward with the belief in redemption. the first two virtues of my mission statement are encapsulated by my third and final goal: to walk humbly with my god. justice and mercy come from him alone, not from myself and my own goodness. therefore, i must live out these virtues with humility, living not for myself and my own glory but to glorify him through the good that i do. i aspire to live my life with god at the center, and have all that i do be inspired by him alone. in order to walk with god, i must first establish a personal relationship with him. to do this, i am going to try to have a better prayer life. prayer is something that i usually struggle with due to my short attention span and inability to be still. however, i would like to try to get into a routine of prayer and build it into my day. as pico iyer says, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). i have encountered many places that have made me feel defined by something larger than myselfat the grotto, at log chapel mass, at sunday vespers. i hope to continue using these means of prayer while they are available to me at notre dame. by having a personal relationship with god through prayer, i believe that i will be able to show him to and see him in others through the connections i have with them. another part of walking humbly with god is to recognize that my life is a journey towards heaven. i want to try to make “memento mori” a phrase that i live by: “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). remembering the brevity of life is something that will make me appreciate it more, while also being aware that i must not become too attached to the things of this world, both the good and the bad. it will also help me to realize that what happens in this life, the good that i do, the joys and sufferings i experience, will bear fruit in the next life. walking with god means offering all of the things i experience in life to him. this was extremely prevalent to me during holy week this year on good friday. someone i had gone to school with had died that monday, and i had been struggling to reconcile her death with a loving father, and i couldn’t stop thinking of her poor grieving mother. however, experiencing jesus’s passion made me think more deeply about suffering: “but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that’s the reason how i was able to go through them and still trust in god and live with joy and gratitude” ("5 minutes" by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). this year on good friday, i finally fully connected christ’s suffering to ours. i thought about how jesus willingly died with her, that he was right next to them suffering with her as she died. so i guess she wasn’t really alone. i’d been telling myself that she wasn't alone before that day, that god was watching over her. but before god was always just someone in heaven watching her die and not stopping it from happening. but it’s more than thatchrist lay down next to her as she died, holding her in his arms and suffering with her. and that brings me some comfort. she wasn’t alonei hope she got some peace knowing that in their last few minutes on earth. or at least i hope she knows that now. and her family isn’t alone eitherright next to her grieving mother is mary, grieving with her. i think about how mary is in utter agonyher bitter weeping and absolute despair as she holds the lifeless body of the baby she had once held in her arms so long ago. i think about how she feels as they put him in the tomb, never to be seen again. and i think about how she feels seeing her son again when he is resurrected. and i think about her joining him in heaven, and how they will never be separated again. and i think about how all graves will be opened on the last day. that girl who died too young can run back to her mother’s loving arms, and that they’ll never lose each other again. and that brings me peace. the suffering will end. the grief will end. we were never meant to live lives without them. but our god and his mother experienced suffering and grief with usso even now we’re not alone, he walks with us always. in my third integration assignment, i wrote “i am currently living a life that i will want to remember when i look back at it” (integration three assignment: write your own eulogy. moreau fye week eight). through doing justice, loving mercy, and walking humbly with my god, i hope to make my life one that is well-lived, on which i will want to remember when i reflect upon my short time at notre dame. i want to live life fully, focusing not only on maximizing my grades but at creating memories. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i want to know myself better through the life i choose to live and the people i form relationships with. looking back at my conversation in week 5, i remember “i was told that i can be too hard on myselfthat i take grades too seriously and i don’t let myself make mistakes” ( "week five discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). experiencing life is allowing myself to make mistakes and knowing that i will still be loved. even if i don’t perfectly live up to the mission i have created for myself, i believe that trying my best to follow it will allow me to have a well-lived life. moreau capstone fr. sandberg moreau april 29, 2022 semester capstone assignment i am a student at the university of notre dame. why? i would be lying if i said that it was not largely because it is what was expected of me. if you’re an american student living in the 21st century, you work as hard as you can to get into a top university; it’s just what you do (i just made a geico commercial! one of the good ones from before they got boring). the american student is told to “succeed, succeed, succeed,” and this is what success looks like. this mentality is so ingrained that to many of my peers, that opening “why” would seem strange. asking someone why they want to go to a good school is like asking someone why they want to win. this way of looking at the world is entirely appropriate to a modern american society that is obsessed with moving forwards and upwards but never stopping to ask why. it has been termed the “rat race,” but that is an insult to rats. rats are simple creatures who always know why they are racing, whether it is away from a cat or towards a block of cheese. americans don’t even know what they want; they are too busy running. this is precisely what harry r. lewis noticed during his time at harvard: “too many students, perhaps after a year or two spent using college as a treadmill to nowhere, wake up in a crisis, not knowing why they have worked so hard” (deresiewicz 3). it is so tempting to view a notre dame education not as a means to an end, or even as an end in of itself, but only as the natural next-step in the life of a young student, a stepping stone on the journey towards the ever-receding rainbow that we call success. fortunately, i think that i can say without undue confidence that i understand why i am here, and i shall try to put my reason for being here into words. i greatly admire fr. hesburgh. i admire him in that he was a man of remarkable intelligence, passion, charisma, kindness, and endurance, all of them to a degree to which i know they will never be found in my own self. but what is even more impressive than the gifts he had is how he used them. he was a leader in the civil rights movement; he was beloved by students; he turned notre dame into what it is today. he was a man who viewed the things he had been given not as things to be privately enjoyed, but means by which he might serve a greater good. in his case, those “things” were the great virtues and strengths that he possessed as an individual. in my case, those “things” can be thought of in terms of my notre dame education. i am not here by chance, or merely because that is what was expected of me. i am here to be formed into a reflective leader who can go out into the world and change it for the better. now, it is all well and good to want to share one’s gifts with the world; but it becomes a bit more complicated when one actually tries to do it. one must deal with the practical question of how can i share my gifts with others, how do i work for social change, how do i work for a good greater than myself? fr. michael himes gives us three questions to help us decide: “1) do you get a kick out of it? 2) are you any good at it? 3) does anyone want you to do it?” (himes 1). the first one can be understood as asking whether or not you enjoy something, or perhaps in the deeper sense of whether or not you feel called to it. the second is easy enough to understand: do you or do you not have the gifts (whatever form they may be in) to serve in a given way? and lastly, is there a need for it? this last one, i think, exists as the surest way of making sure that you are serving others rather than just yourself. using these questions, and combining them with what i have learned about myself during this first year at notre dame, i have come to the conclusion that i might be called to a teaching position, or even a preaching position. i love the idea of being a professor, and i have felt a call to priesthood. i certainly think that i have what it takes to be either; and i know that there is a need for both in our world, especially for priests. i feel a little twinge of excitement whenever i think about either one, and i really believe that it is because in both cases, i can clearly see myself working to improve the lives of others. as i continue to discern the way in which i am called to share my gifts with the world—be that through the priesthood, through a job as a professor, or something else entirely—i know that introspection will be an important part of making the right choice. tasha eurich writes about introspection in her essay “the right way to be introspective.” i disagree with some of what she suggests, mostly because of how it is articulated. i think that it is in accordance with the spirit of her essay to say that the key to introspection is to focus on concrete things that are within our power to change, rather than conditions which we have no power over. and this really is essential: if i am to lead and serve others, i must understand myself. i must take the time to ask myself what my goals are, and how they might be achieved. i do not want to live on autopilot: i want to move in a single direction, the right direction. and there are two steps to making that happen: i must know what the right direction is, and i must move. i will start by examining the first of those two steps: how is it that a person can find out what the “right direction” is? how can a person learn about oneself, about one’s goals, about one’s strengths and weaknesses, about one’s calling? william deresiewicz has something to say about this: “thinking means concentrating on one thing long enough to develop an idea about it. not learning other people's ideas, or memorizing a body of information, however much those may sometimes be useful. developing your own ideas. in short, thinking for yourself.” (deresiewicz 6). deresiewicz’s thought can be applied to any number of situations; but for our purposes, i think that the word “thinking” can be substituted with “reflecting.” we live in such a noisy world. i touched on this earlier on in my essay: we are always running around, constantly busy. we are so busy, i think, that we have forgotten how to relax. i have experienced this firsthand: even in my downtime, i feel that i have to be doing something: that might be reading the news, or scrolling through instagram, or doing some writing. none of those things are bad, of course. my point is that the modern man feels he must be constantly consuming or producing something: it is so hard to just sit and reflect. but deresiewicz says that this is exactly what we need to be doing. in order to lead, you must know yourself; in order to know yourself, you must take time to reflect. that, i think, is what we mean when we talk about “reflective leadership.” let us move now to the second issue: once we understand what the right direction is, how do we act? the answer is simple: through philosophy! to paraphrase a definition from meghan sullivan which i live very much, philosophy is reflection applied to the world. it is when you act in such a way as to make what you know about yourself and your goals coherent with all that you do. to do this takes great courage: i imagine that that is why week twelve of our class was titled “acting with courage.” it also requires discipline, and discipline is not always easy. a dead thing can float down the stream; but we do not want to float down the stream, we want to move in the right direction. that means that we will sometimes have to go against the flow; we will have to do things that we don’t want to do, we will have to do things that are socially unacceptable. but do them we must. it could be said that a true leader is a person who does philosophy no matter the cost. and so, we have arrived at a conclusion about what it is to be a reflective leader. i would like to spend my last paragraph discussing what that looks like in terms of the people being led. i believe that, to a great extent, every leader must be a mentor. in week four, we talked about the benefits of a mentoring environment. i have been fortunate enough to have had a few good mentors in my lifetime, and i would like someday to fill that role for somebody else. i think that mentoring can be very helpful for someone who is trying to be introspective; oftentimes, we can get in our own heads and deceive ourselves, so it is good to have someone who can look at you from the outside and see something that might be hidden in plain sight. a leader must also be empathetic; we talked about that during week nine. it is very important to understand oneself in order to be a leader, but it is also important to understand other people who may be coming from a different place. i read the article about “growing up gay and catholic,” and it was so hard to see a man who took his faith so seriously reduced, at times, to self-loathing. finally, i learned something from week ten that i was not expecting: a leader must sometimes be led. a teacher can be taught by his or her students. a volunteer can be cared for by orphans. as a leader, it is necessary to be humble enough to allow the leader-led relationship to be switched when it is necessary. if i can put all of these into practice, i know that i can become a reflective leader with the ability to enact social change. capstone integration week 13 capstone what kind of person does dylan from dillon truly want to be in life step 1: mission statement my goal in life is to be the best version of myself. i want to be courageous, loving, and successful. how will i be courageous one might ask. in order to be courageous one must face his or her own fears within reason. being courageous does not just mean doing something scary (for example, a penguin walking up to a polar bear is not courageous, it is straight up just not smart). to be courageous does not mean putting your life on the line, but more means to face your fears and to go a bit out of your comfort zone in order to get something done. next, i will be loving everyday by accepting and loving all kinds of people no matter what. no color of your skin or race should ever be used to justify if you love someone. we should all just love everyone no matter what. finally i want to finish my life by making sure i am successful. in my eyes, being successful means that you are fulfilled with your life. being successful cannot be characterized by your position in society or how you are doing in school, but should rather be represented by how happy you are with yourself. i want to make sure that i am always taking care of myself and making sure i am okay, and if i do that, then i can live a successful life. (“mission statement”, moreau fye week 13). step 2: articulate, using concrete and observable examples, how this mission statement will animate your life for the next three years. in week 1 of moreau, we talked a lot about self care and taking time for yourself. the message that we learned from this week is that even when you are stressed out (especially during weeks like finals) i need to make sure to take care of myself ("why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted) moreau fye week 1). this message is important because it correlates with my mission statement as i want to make sure i am taking care of myself even when i am stressed out. in the next three years here at notre dame i will make sure to take time for myself even if i am stressed about an upcoming exam. in week 2 of moreau, we read a piece called “the domer dozen”. it was basically about 12 notre dame students who graduated and it explains what they did with their life so far. here this is where i learned about a man named dr. austin hickman who graduated in 2016 (“domer dozen”, notre dame university moreau fye week 2). his story was that he changed majors many times and then ultimately combined his two majors into one when he chose his job. the message i learned from this week was that i do not need to big my major right now, and i do not even have to choose one specific one as there may be a way to combine them. basically this connects to my mission statement as it just shows that i need to be more courageous and talk to people i do not know to find out different career paths and how i can go about achieving them. if i want to be courageous, then i need to be able to get over my fear of talking to older adults about things i may not be too confident in. thus, in the next 3 years, i will be going to the career center more to learn about how i can combine finance and econ together and make a living out of it. in week 3 of moreau, we read, "three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) and here is where i found the quote, “is it something that people around us really need us to do? does the community call us to this work?” ("three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) moreau mailto:ddevleti@nd.edu https://docs.google.com/document/d/1stxrrp-waiet8jayxs4ev31ydrrys7wk0ebgepumfso/edit https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884?module_item_id=149291 fye week 3). this quote stuck out to me because it explains that for the world to become a better place everyone needs to help out. this connects to my mission statement because in it i talk about wanting to make the world a better place, so in order to do that i need to be nice to everyone and try to get my entire community to follow my lead because only then will the world become a better place. here at notre dame, i will strive to make the community a better place by leading by example and being kind to everyone no matter what (even if i may have not liked them before). in week 4 of moreau, we did the assignment to find out what a possible career path for us could be ( “7 clues to help you get started with the career development process”, university of notre dame moreau fye week 4). similar to week 2 this just helped me realize that i do not need to just pick a job that i think will make me money. this week in moreau showed me that there are so many different jobs in this world that i just need to find the one that will make me happiest. this connects to my mission statement because seeing this made me realize that i can be successful by just finding a job that will make me a happy person in life because that is what a successful life is. here at notre dame, i will start talking to alumni like we did in this week's moreau to see if i could see myself doing the job they are currently doing and choose the one that i think would make me happiest and then pursue that one. in week 5 of moreau, we had to have a conversation with someone to reflect and i chose to have it with my mom. i surprisingly learned a lot from this conversation about myself. my mom told me how loving i can be, but that i just need to be more open to things. (“conversation with mom”, dylan devletian moreau fye week 5). this connects well to my mission statement because one of my goals in life is to be loving to everyone. my mom helped me learn how to do this in a way because she said i am such a loving person, but i need to open myself up to more people so that they can see that. here at notre dame, in the next three years i will try to open myself up to more people so that they can see that i am an actual loving person. maybe if people see this, then they will also try to open up and be more loving to another person so on and so forth which in total would make the world a better place. in week 6 of moreau, we read “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”. this is where i found the quote, “but to my astonishment, our data told the exact opposite story. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”, tasha eurich phd moreau fye week 6). yes, i do understand that the people who are not constantly stressing about things and living a happy life can feel like they understand themselves, but there also is a high chance that they do not know something that could actually make them happier and thus they may not actually know themselves all to well (or they may be too afraid to change themselves to be this person). meanwhile, a person who knows they are unhappy or scared of things, may be more inclined to look deep into themselves to find what will make them happy and live a better life than the one they are living now. this fits in well to my mission statement because knowing who you really are is the first step in living a successful life because once you know that, then you will know how to live a fulfilled life and thus a successful life. in my time here at notre dame, i will try to find more about who i am, although i already think i know, maybe joining different clubs will help me further my knowledge of who i am and help me live a more successful life. in week 7 of moreau, i discovered the quote, “we have so much to do, and we must do it together. but how can we do that with all the evil we breathe every day?” (“his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone”, pope francis moreau fye week 7). this quote is important because i would have to imagine that 98 percent of the total population wants the world to be https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://docs.google.com/document/d/1i_tbya1j4gd9qqgy5a0qvl9-gjzrepifaoc-apq7ybc/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/author/tasha-eurich/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript a better place. people are just afraid to do something because they do not think their choice will have any significance in the grand scheme of things. i would argue that this is a bigger obstacle over the evil in the world. although there is evil, if everyone just did one more nice thing a day with the thought that it would help positively impact the world, then i believe this could result in rooting out some of the evil that we face in life. this connects to my mission statement because i want to be known as a loving and courageous person. this quote can show how i can be both because if i stand up to the “evil” people in the world, then i will be showing courage while also showing love and maybe others will then follow my example and they will also continue to make the world a better place. in my time here at notre dame, i will try my best to stand up for people who may not be able to fight battles alone and hopefully this will encourage others to do the same. week 8 of moreau is where we wrote our integration 3. in this, we ultimately wrote our future eulogy and i did it as if my mom wrote it about me. in this i basically said that i wanted to be remembered for being a loving, courageous, and kind person which is very similar to my mission statement (integration 3, moreau fye week 8). this just proves how serious i am about living up to my mission statement due to the fact that this is what i want to be known as when i perish. in my next three years at notre dame, i want to try to have all my classmates see that i am the person that i am striving to be (i want my actions to back it up). in week 9 of moreau, we had to read, “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together”. this is where i discovered the quote, “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another.” ( “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together”, steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). this is what author steve reifenberg learned from his time abroad. it is an important message for all of us to understand as our issues may seem relatively large, but they are so minimal in the larger picture. we all need to help each other out because if we do we can solve the larger issues in the world. this connects with my mission statement because it takes courage to help people we do not know because we have to face our fears in order to help them (at least it is a fear of mine to help people i do not know). here at notre dame, even if i am having a tough time i will try my best to make at least one random person smile because not only will that help me face one of my fears, but it will also help show that i am a loving person. in week 10 of moreau, we had to read about a kid who was afraid to come out for who he really was. “this was the summer after my junior year of college. i was 21 at the time, and tyler was the first friend i had ever come out to.” (“growing up gay and catholic”, jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). this quote comes from the piece titled, “growing up catholic and gay.” this quote stuck out to me because no one should feel uncomfortable about telling people who you really are. he may have held this feeling back for 14 years because he thought society would hate him for it, and this is not a world we should want to live in. we need to make it acceptable for people to come out with who they really are. we always say we want people to be themselves, but how can we truly mean that if it is not deemed to be ok to come out as gay? this connects well to my mission statement because this kid had the courage to come out even though he was afraid it would be deemed unacceptable. i want to have the courage this kid has, but i wish that people would have just loved him from the start so he didn't feel uncomfortable coming out and being himself. here at my time at notre dame, i want to make sure that everyone around me feels that they can be who they are no matter what. no one should have to hide who they are because they think someone will not like it. i will love them regardless of who they want to be which is why it is in my mission statement. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_uhrpl3tmezeonr7v02jhycs66htkbpjmqa7_4n6g0o/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 in week 11 of moreau, i found the quote, “it's very hard to convince someone to change their mind about an issue.” (“passion isn’t enough”, hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). this quote connects well to my mission statement because sometimes it takes courage to change your mind about a topic you were once passionate about and i want to be a courageous person. in my time here at notre dame, i want to build a mind that is courageous enough to be able to have an opinion even if it is not the most popular one, but i also want to be brave enough to admit i was wrong if that is the case. i will try to do this when i am with my friends and tell them if i think they are wrong rather than just going with something because it is the popular opinion. in week 12 of moreau, i discovered the quote, “we come not just as servants but as their neighbors, to be with them and of them.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross”, congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). we as individuals can do all these things to help the minorities like african americans out and get them jobs, but we cannot just stop there. each and everyone of us needs to go one step further and make sure we treat them like actual human beings. we as people need to show love for everyone and as the quote says treat everyone as our “neighbors.” this quote connects well to my mission statement because it almost ties in all three of my points (being loving, courageous, and successful). we need to show love for all people regardless of their race, but we also need to be able to step out of our comfort zone and help them so this will take courage, and finally if we do all of that, then we can all live a happy and thus successful life. in my final three years here at notre dame i will do my part in making everyone feel like they should be included in everything they do regardless of race because that's how the world should be. it will certainly take courage from me to show love to people i do not know, but only then can we all truly live successful lives. in total, i want to be able to become the person who i want to be in the next three years here at notre dame, but not only that, i want others to see me as that person. my mission statement describes who i want to be, so i hope over the next three years i take the proper steps to become that person. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ a letter to my past self looking back at my life, i think to myself, “what made my life good? what did i accomplish to make myself happy?” those are things that i constantly thought throughout my life as well, and i remember i landed on the quote, “it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) being a musical person myself, this quote always resonated with me because, well, its true. if music just keeps going on and on, it gets repetitive and boring. we need rests, breaks, and transitions in music to make it more interesting and involved. i realized that is also what we need in real life. just going through the motions of life can lead to a very depressing, drab life, one that no one really wants to live. but those breaks, those intermissions, is what helps build up our life into something very enjoyable. another thing is though, you can’t force these rests or breaks. they need to come naturally, or else they just won’t be as effective as they are supposed to be. constantly dwelling on how to make your life better, or how to change your life does nothing but make you stressed and trying to find answers where they simply don’t exist, which is what i started to do when i was younger. i’m glad i ended up changing my thought process from that because it was a very hard time in my life. stressing out about what i was going to do in my future was something i dwelled on a lot. i knew i wanted to go into the medical field, but being pre-med was just so stressful. the work was genuinely hard, and it sucked seeing other non stem major friends having a fun social life when i was just stuck inside doing homework a lot of the time. this helped me realize that i could expand my horizons and not just look at what i had always thought i was going to do. the quote, “if you had told me 15 years ago that i was going to be a clinical psychologist and that i was going to study cancer i would not have believed you. i wanted to be a diplomat. i wanted to focus on international relations, and actually my first interaction with notre dame was through a summer global studies institute where we were talking about sunni shiite relations in the middle east, so a far cry from what i do today.” (domer dozen by notre dame alumni association – moreau fye week two) helped me see that there was more to life than just stressing and restricting myself to a specific future. i soon learned how to stop stressing out so much. i taught myself to “go with the flow” and it made my life so much better. panic and anxiety attacks became less of a constant in my life, and i started feeling more free and happier. i am glad that i was able to show myself that life wasn’t just about the future, and that i also needed to live in the present. happiness wasn’t always a constant for me in college. college is hard. i was stressed out a lot of the time, and there were a lot of dark, anxiety attack ridden days. going a day at a time was even hard for me sometimes. getting out of bed wasn’t always the easiest, and sometimes, it took my closest friends to convince me to get up and go to classes. the quote, “happiness changes fro moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life,” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) really helped me understand that i wasn’t always going to be happy, and that that was okay. choosing if i wanted to be pre-med was an entirely different struggle than deciding what i wanted my major to be. i heard the quote, “there is no ‘best major out there – but there is a ‘best major for you.’” (navigating your career journey – moreau first year experience course by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4)hearing that really helped me that what is best for someone else might not be the best thing for me and that it is okay for people to have their own personal preferences. it also showed me that individuality is a good thing and that you shouldn’t be ashamed if other people are interested or better at other things than you. after having a discussion with one of my close friends about potentially choosing a different major, i felt a lot better and realized that maybe what i was studying wasn’t the easiest major, but it was something that i was genuinely interested in and wanted to learn more about. as i had said before, i was depressed in college, and it took a huge toll on my school work and my social life. i was so sad a lot of the time, and it was hard to keep a positive outlook on life when i just felt so bad in the dumps. the quote, ‘on my worst days, it can be difficult to name a single good thing that happened. so on those days, especially, i try to name three things for which i’m grateful. recent examples include a particularly good cup of coffee, fresh peonies on the coffee table, a funny meme, a sweet moment with my husband, a text from a friend at just the right time,” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6) really helped me understand that even if i do have negative thoughts floating around in my mind, i can always take time to appreciate the little things in life. even just taking a chance to stop and smell the roses, acknowledging the tiny things that you might not even realize make you smile, can make your day just a little bit better. lastly, i want to reflect on my life, and how i expected my future to go. the quote, “the future is made of yous, it is made of encounters, because life flows through our relations with others,” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis – moreau fye week 7) means a lot because it shows me that it is important to look back on my life. when bad things happen in my life, i tend to try and ignore them and just forget about them, but i realized that’s not healthy. i have to learn to acknowledge everything that happens in my life because all of those things shaped me up to who i am today and what life i lived, and i am eternally grateful for that and proud of myself for everything i have been through. february 24, 2022 moreau professor chan the end from my beginning “it matters not what someone is born, but what they grow to be.” — albus dumbledore, what are the aspects of our life that will matter when we are gone from this earth? what will people really remember about us? the truth is most of us will be forgotten entirely from the world. our kids may speak of us for a while, keeping our name alive but overtime we will fade away. the people that are remembered are the ones that make a meaningful contribution to society. so what are we really living for? what is the purpose of what we do day after day? we must find purpose through living a meaningful life. a life well lived starts with understanding the life we are living. many of us are so hyper focused on our tasks that we are blind to significant things that happen around us. it actually can cause our work to suffer. “whenever i finally force myself away from my desk for a day, of course, i find the opposite: the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau week 1) once we note the life we are living may not be how we want to be remembered we can focus on working towards a life well lived. what inspires a life well lived? what makes people want to help others, improve the world or make a difference? what causes people like lucy driscoll, my example from the domer dozen, to “inspire a rising generation of women scientists and engineers who will use their skills for the betterment of society.” (https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ moreau week 2) it is our recognition that there is something missing in the world that must be changed. once we realize where passions are it becomes easier to identify this. now that we have been inspired, what are the questions that guide a meaningful life? there are three main questions that can direct us. “what gives you joy? what are you really good at? what do the people around you really need?” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau week 3) it is important to start with the first one, what gives you joy. we will never truly feel as if we are living a life well lived if we are not enjoying what we are doing. our activities must be paired with some form of passion to be significant to us. next comes what you're good at? it is important to ask this second because you can be good at something but hate it, which will leave you unfulfilled. lastly, what do the people around you need? if you are doing something that you love and are good at but it provides nothing for others, your life is not meaningful. it is through helping others that we can truly satisfy our hearts. we can also ask others to help us look deeper within ourselves by asking them questions. for example “what issues are important to me? or, what do you think i want to change in the world?” (week five discernment conversation activitymoreau week 5) asking someone close to us these personal questions, can allow us to reach a deeper understanding, or perhaps a side of us that we didn't know was there. how can we use this knowledge to live a life well lived? we know what we love to do, what we are good at and what others need, so how can we apply this in our lives? one way is to search “the career paths pages (which) provide the resources to explore career possibilities, provide helpful resources, and assist you in starting on your career exploration.” ("navigating your career journey” moreau week 4) all of our knowledge asking those three questions can be put forth to finding a career that could fill all of those boxes. how can we address potential problems that might arise from our attempts to live a life well lived? firstly it is important to realize that we have these problems. using a tool like a journal to write them down can help us navigate these issues. when we journal we may find more self-knowledge by “at times, asking what, instead of why, (which) can force us to name our emotions, a process that a strong body of research has shown to be effective” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau week 6) it is important that we are prepared to combat problems because we will certainly face them when seeking a life well lived. the last step in forming a life well lived is to create relationships that are genuine. to do this we need to start by putting people ahead of ourselves and technology. “only by educating people to true solidarity will we be able to overcome the "culture of waste" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week 7) we have to be willing to give our time and listen to each other. it isn't through snapchat, instagram and ticktok that true relationships are formed. it is through the in person interactions that connections are formed. when people look back on my life i hope i can be remembered as someone who inspired others. right now that is my ultimate goal. it would involve doing what brings me joy, as well as be something i am good at. i want to be remembered not only for my accomplishments (that i hope to achieve) but for the person i was outside of them. the people i look up to currently, are the ones who are accomplishing what i dream to, while also giving back to society in some meaningful way. whether it is raising awareness for girls running programs in poorer nations fostering children, these are the people that are truly living a life well lived. that is what i desire to be like. doing what i love while helping others in some way. that is when i will feel like i lived a meaningful life. integration 3 moreau fys 3/4/2022 wise last words for will we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of william heffernan. now will accomplished so much in his life well lived and he told me that he would not have been as fulfilled had it not been for what he learned in his freshman year moreau class. one of his favorite quotes was from father hesburgh, a famous president of notre dame, “we do not prove something by tearing it down. we prove something by building it up” (week 2). although, will thought it best to substitute something with someone. he lived life with the philosophy that putting someone else down, never brought you up. he always tried his best to see the best in others just how many of his family and friends saw the best in him and reminded him of his worth every day. as a result, he built meaningful relationships with each and every person that he met. i am sure many of you here have stories where will helped bring you up, or talked you through a difficult decision. i know that whenever he was faced with a dilemma or just a life change in general he would always turn to his family and friends and ask them self-reflective questions. this habit started after week 5 of moreau when he had to call a friend about his college major discernment. the conversation led to will having a better understanding of what core values are most important to him in his schoolwork and in the workplace. on top of this, it also benefited the friend he talked to who was also choosing what to major in. so will made it a mission to make sure that he turned those uncomfortable conversations into comfortable ones where both parties walked away in a better place than where they started. notre dame also provided help along the way, “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you”(week 4). over his four college years will was able to discern what he wanted to do post graduation, and took a job with a tidal energy firm. a large part of taking this job was that it was giving back to the ocean and beach community that he grew up in. it was important to will that the job he would work for most of his life made a difference in the world, even if it was as small as finding more sustainable ways to produce energy. after college, will took what he had learned in school into the real world. while will loved his job and took pride in all the work that he did, he always made sure that it never took over his life completely. he made time for family, friends, fun, and rest. he often sighted pico iyer on why keeping a work life balance was so important, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often” (week 1). his co-workers always said was most productive after taking a break to go surf with his kids. if the waves were good you could always find will out there, even if it was just for a few minutes during a lunch break. will always preached about the importance of not losing yourself in work. he often put it to me as the difference between happiness and joy. work can bring a lot of happiness, as it provides financial stability and material goods. however, money can not buy joy. will believed that fr. michael himes’ definition of joy was right, “joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to extend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one's talents even more widely than one had before'' (week 3). will was adamant that this joy, this impulsion only came from true life giving relationships. most times it is others that open our eyes to the talents we have, and encourage us to pursue lives that suit those talents in order that we make the most of the gifts that we are given. another story from his moreau class that will shared with me was when they read a chapter from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle. this book is all about acceptance and how community is inherent to being human. in the specific chapter that they read father boyle and prisoners sneak away to cook an iguana together. will’s favorite line from the story, as i am sure many of us know, was, “alone they didn’t have much but together they had a potful of plenty” (week 7). will made it a point to share all that he had. he used to say “what is the point of having a ball if you have no one to have a catch with.” now that applies to much more than just material things, sharing love, time and energy are also important in relationships. as i wrap up, someone passing away always brings about self-reflection and thoughts about how we are doing in our own lives. will did spend a lot of time in self reflection especially towards the end of his life. however, when he talked about bettering oneself by taking a step back he cautioned not to get lost in it or to dwell on the wrong things. again moreau was important for getting self reflection right. tasha eurich says, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (week 6). so if you do some self reflection in the upcoming days, will wants to make sure that you focus on both the good and bad things in your life, think about the steps you can take to bring about positive change. remember to act on those steps too because just thinking about your problem and goals is not going to solve/achieve them. i hope you all were as inspired from will’s well lived life as i was and that you will use this inspiration to make an impact on those around you. works cited “https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ ” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1 father hesburg in the movie hesburg moreau fye week two three key questions (adapted from fr. michael himes) moreau fye week three “https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/” moreau fye week four “https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/” by tasha eurich moreau week six https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817/download?download_frd=1 = by greg boyle moreau fye week seven https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817/download?download_frd=1 integration three 2/23/22 week 8 integration three how should i strive to be remembered? in week one of this moreau course, we discussed and practiced self-reflection. as talked about in the article “why we need to slow down our lives”, pico iyer placed emphasis on the importance of allowing oneself to rest and take a moment out of our busy day to self-reflect. oftentimes i think to myself that taking a break to meditate or self-reflect sounds nice, but it simply isn't something that i have time for. however, through reading the articles assigned for week one of this moreau course, i realized that it is not a matter of having time but instead it is a matter of making time. i will never have time for self-reflection if i don't prioritize it, just like anything else in life. in pico iyer’s article, she wrote “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote really made me reflect on how i choose to spend my time. although i know that it is still important to work hard and stay focused in life, i realized that at the end of my life, i don't want to look back on my life as something that was only filled with working and studying alone. i want to prioritize time to relax, have fun, and enjoy my time with others because, in my eulogy, i want to be remembered as someone who made time for others and was able to relax and spend quality time with the people that i love. in week two of this moreau course, we tackled the question of “what inspires a life well-lived?”. specifically, during this week of the course, we discussed the life of father hesburgh and what made it well-lived. hearing the stories of all of the amazing and selfless acts that father hesburgh did during his life was admirable. throughout his life, he continuously fought to unify people rather than divide them, which is a trait that i find essential in living a life well-lived. in the hesburgh film, heburgh says, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up”("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). this quote was powerful to me because i feel like it is something that everyone needs to be reminded of, despite how obvious it may seem. in my eulogy, i don’t want to be remembered as someone who tore others down to get ahead, but rather someone who encouraged those around me and celebrated their successes alongside them. in week three of this moreau course, the material we discussed focused on discerning whether or not you are living a life well-lived. the article titled “three key questions” by father michael himes prompted me to consider whether i am taking my life and the opportunities i am given for granted ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). one of the three key questions in this article was if the life decisions that i am making bring me joy, which caused me to think deeply about how i am choosing to live my life. in my eulogy, i want to be remembered as a happy person, ideally, someone who didn't waste away my time in life with things that didn’t bring me joy. this should seemingly be an attainable goal, considering the amazing opportunities i have been given and the amazing people that surround me, however, oftentimes i find myself straying away from this goal unintentionally. it can be easy to fall into a monotonous pattern of daily activities of which few of them bring me https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/16258 2/23/22 week 8 integration three authentic joy, however, this week’s material made me realize that i need to be more intentional about how i spend my time because it is not everlasting. in relation to this topic of how i chose to spend my time in life, in week four of this moreau course we discussed the importance of trying new things and testing the waters. as stated in the career development article we read for week four of this course, “ the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). week four of this course was helpful for me because it made me realize what i enjoy doing and what i would possibly like to pursue as my career in the future. in addition to this, it also emphasized to me the importance of trying new things and being open to new experiences because you never know what will strike your interest. ideally, i would like to pursue a career that brings me joy and fulfillment, so it is important to give myself the opportunity to discover what my interests are. in my eulogy, i want to be remembered as someone who truly enjoyed life every step of the way. a career takes up so much of one’s life, so it is important to me to enjoy my career. in week five of the moreau course, i had a conversation with my mom about what she thinks my strengths are ("week five discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). it was nice to have this conversation with someone that knows me so well because i was able to learn from a different perspective about when and how i excel in different situations in life. for example, it was helpful to hear my mom’s response to the question “can you reflect on a specific episode when you saw me “in the zone,” when i was at my very best? what was i doing? how/why does this episode demonstrate my best self?”. my mom told me that i am most in the zone when i am doing the things i am most dedicated to or love doing to most, such as painting, drawing, and working on my hobbies in general. this made me think about the fact that i haven't made time for most of my hobbies since i have started college and that i want to make it a priority to do so in the future. when thinking about how this relates to my eulogy, i would like to be remembered as someone who cared immensely about what i created and the impact that i had on the world not just through my work, but also during my free time. i don’t want my hobbies and passion for certain things to diminish as i get older. in week six of this moreau course, we discussed the obstacles that we encounter when striving for a live well-lived. as dr.kim said in the video we watched for week six, “suffering is part of our lives, it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). i really took a lot from watching this video because it made me realize how important it is to never stop being grateful for what we have in life, regardless of the struggles we are going through at the moment. despite the obstacles and hardships that dr.kim went through, he remained grateful for what he did have, and still obtained a life well-lived. this outlook on life was extremely admirable and it is how i aspire to be in my life. your mindset on life has the power to completely change how you live your life, and i aspire to live life with the mindset of optimism and gratitude. when i reach the https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145971 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145971 2/23/22 week 8 integration three end of my life, i want to look back and believe that i made the most out of what i was given and tried my best every day to be the best version of myself. in week seven of this moreau course, we discussed the importance of having strong and meaningful relationships in life. pope francis touched on this in his speech that we listened to for week seven’s assignment (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). in this speech, pope francis talks about how we are not meant to live life alone in judgment and seclusion. one of the most enjoyable aspects of life is spending time with people and being inclusive and welcoming to others. in my eulogy, i want to be remembered and loved by many. i want to have had an impact on others in a positive way, and be recalled as someone who was inclusive and loving towards others at all times. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration three due 3/4/22 a winding journey turned straight in this world, there are little things that cannot be answered. societal innovations continue to answer the biggest medical, astrological, and even anthropological phenomena that have stumped humans for centuries. yet distinct, indeterminate questions still remain; what is love, how do i determine success, and many more. i truly believe that life’s biggest indeterminate is a pondering of itself: what is a life well lived? the truth is that there is no right answer. i guarantee that if you ask a room full of people what a life well lived means to them, every single person will have a unique response. for me personally, a life well-lived is one that i achieve inner peace in, knowing that what is meant to come in my life will. a life well-lived is achieved by experiencing all that you are meant to experience in this life, all the while taking in each and every experience along the way. as a firm believer in the saying “what is meant to come to me, will”, adopting this mindset is key to living a life with less disappointment and therefore a life more well-lived. it is so easy to get caught up in the life of wants and wishes. i wish this person liked me back, i want to get to know this person, i want this interview for an internship, etc. i think this is the completely wrong way to live a good life. it puts you in such a powerless position, always hoping that you will get “lucky” and be in the lower position.“asking why appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems and place blame instead of moving forward in a healthy and productive way” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). realizing that the important things in life will find a way to you allows you to live life independently; you continuously focus on yourself and self-improvement, becoming a better person and attracting things into your life rather than wishing for them. as someone who used to struggle in the past with self-confidence, recently adopting this mindset has made me much more confident and content with my life. instead of throwing myself fully into people in the hopes that they will like me back, i trust in an attraction mindset and focus on improving myself along the way. i think that a key aspect to living a life well-lived is being able to live in the moment and appreciate all the blessings in your life. a life well lived can be defined by the moments within it, and these distinct memories and experiences are central to everything good in life. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development -moreau fye week 4). there is a common belief that certain “core memories” are distinct moments crucial to your development and who you are as a person. for me personally, a few come to mind: my first ever hockey game, the first date i ever went on, and the day i got into notre dame. i firmly believe that i would not be the same person i am today without the unfolding of these moments, and i am sure that many more “core memories” in the future will shape my life well-lived. appreciating these moments in life is easy to remiss, but i think it is so crucial to achieving true happiness in this life. there is simply nothing like being present in the moment. i remember about a month ago feeling the most amazing sense of bliss. my friends and i were walking off campus to celebrate our friends’ birthdays. we were cracking jokes, listening to music, and enjoying the most beautiful sunset on a rare warm winter night. i will never forget thinking to myself “i am exactly where i want to be and i couldn’t be happier”. it is in these moments that you realize that you are not hoping to achieve a life well-lived; no, you are currently living a life well lived! how amazing is that? i think that the final major aspect of achieving a life well lived is forming genuine relationships with people that make you a better person in multifaceted ways. they say that the most important people in your life are the ones that push you the hardest, and i completely agree. i still stay in contact with my high school chemistry teacher and contribute a lot of my academics to him, and it is solely because of how hard he pushed me. he would give tests and quizzes every single day, taking points off if you didn’t stop writing the instant time was up and demanding excellence at all times. i cannot tell you how many 2:00 am nights i spent studying thermochemistry, all the while questioning why i was putting myself through it. but i made it through, and now i am excelling in my current chemistry classes because of the foundation i created, albeit forcibly. the relationships that push you to be the very best version of yourself day in and day out are the ones that define a life well-lived. “sometimes you are thrown into each other’s jurisdiction, and that feels better than living, as the buddhists say, in the ‘illusion of separateness ” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle-moreau fye week 7). take being thrown into someone’s jurisdiction as a challenge, and make them better in the process. as the end of my freshman year at the university of notre dame comes ever closer to an end, i can’t help but appreciate all the amazing things in my life. while living a life well lived is a lifelong process, i would have to say that things are going pretty well as of now. i am blessed with both healthy and happy friends and family. i am excelling in school at one of the best universities in the world. i am forming some of the best friendships of my life with the best people. i simply cannot ask for anything better, and i know that all things will sort themselves as time goes on. capstone integration mission statement (re-stated) my mission is to do things in my life that will provide myself and others with a sense of happiness and joy. i help make others feel a sense of belonging by ensuring that they feel understood and listened to, and through this i try to make people understand that they are valued. i believe that feeling like you are a part of something is a large part of living a good life, and creating communities helps all of us to feel valued, so that is why i think that everyone should feel that way. there are too many times in people’s lives when they feel alone or unimportant, and i think that these experiences should be minimized when possible (and many times it is possible to minimize them). i believe that there are several ways to provide others with joy, and i want to use my own talents to achieve this as well. creating things that are tailored to the likes and values of others often brings people happiness, and i especially try to remember little things that someone may mention and use that knowledge to create something truly special or meaningful for them. remembering personal details and turning them into something new can also allow people to feel seen and valued. this is another method i use to make sure that others know that i am listening to and valuing them and their interests. we are all human, and i believe that we all deserve to be treated with compassion and kindness, especially when we do not feel those things or feel like we deserve them. life is hard, and sometimes all we need to know is that one person can see us, and i always hope to be this person when people need it. by doing all of this, i hope to also achieve self-fulfillment and happiness. knowing that what i can do for others provides them with happiness and joy gives me those feelings as well, so i believe that all of things come together to be my mission. how it will guide my future i think that this mission statement will help me in a few different ways. the first way is that it will guide me as i select which activities to participate in and which major and minors i will pursue. my statement talks a lot about what i like to do for other people, and i think that this will be important in my journey of choosing a major and minors that i will enjoy and subsequently making my time at notre dame more enjoyable (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i want to do things that allow me to be creative but also allow me to bring joy to other people, and i think that reflecting on my mission statement will remind me of how important it is to find these things in a major and minors. additionally, i am always wanting to become better at the skills that i stated in my mission statement, so i hope that in the next three years and in the foreseeable future that it will inspire me to continue to learn and develop my habits and skills (“university of notre dame mission statement” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week thirteen). i also talked about how many people may feel alone and unimportant, and i think that learning about people through my programs will help me improve at helping people who feel like that. there are so many systems of injustice and prejudice that affect so many people (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross, 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve), including myself, so i want to look into programs that help me better recognize and combat these things. additionally, i always want to understand different and diverse perspectives to the best of my ability and avoid echo chambers (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven), so https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s participating in activities that stretch my knowledge will hopefully help me improve in that area as well. a second way that my mission statement will guide me is that it will help me remind myself of the way that i must treat myself. i talked a lot about how i hope to treat other people, but i think that looking over this statement periodically will help me remember that i should be treated in all of the kind ways that i wish to treat others. i think that i often self-analyze and pick at my own actions, and this is never good for my mental health (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). however, i am only human, just like everyone else, and i deserve to be kind to myself in the same ways that i am kind to others. while i encourage others to take breaks or rest for the sake of their wellbeing, i sometimes forget to allow this of myself (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). allowing myself to dwell on things and always feel like i need to be busy are not healthy habits, and i think that they are often driven by my anxiety. i have to become more comfortable with the idea that it is okay to ask for help (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). i also think that college is a big step for everyone, and we may often discount this achievement. i need to work on recognizing that what i am accomplishing right now is extremely impressive and remarkable (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three), and i should give myself more credit for all of what i’ve done so far and what i will be doing for the next three years. a third way that this will guide me is that it will remind me of what i should be looking for from the relationships in my life. in part of my mission statement i discussed https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/473072?module_item_id=147382 how important the existence of and participation in communities is. throughout the rest of college it will be important for me to make sure that i maintain healthy and fulfilling relationships, and i must continuously recognize how when i am with my friends and family, i often feel very joyful and content (“tattoos on the heart chapter 6: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). those relationships are so valuable to me, and i think that during the next three years i must keep in mind exactly how important it is for me to maintain those relationships. after all, just like everyone else, i do deserve to be loved by others (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten), and i can feel this through the relationships that i hold close to me. i also need to realize that while it is great to be there for others, (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two), i don’t always need to fall into the role of the helper in relationships (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i am good at helping others and providing them with a sense of joy, but i should remember that it is okay to seek that out for myself. all in all, i think that this mission statement will be useful in reminding me of my values while i am balancing the many facets in college. reflecting on it will hopefully bring me joy from others’ happiness and joy from my own happiness. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit moreau integration 3 3/4/2022 living in preparation for my eulogy a eulogy is often a great look at what a person valued most in life. some people may have stories that highlight their focus on wealth accumulation. such people would have stories in their eulogy about their persistence and hard work to accomplish their goal of becoming more wealthy. though expensive items and large bank accounts may be nice to have, what people are truly remembered for is their acts of kindness and generosity to those around them. other people have stories in their eulogy regarding their value of family and friendships. these stories would highlight someone’s ability to be welcoming to all and light up a room with a friendly smile. at a top university like notre dame, people (including myself) find themselves getting caught up in just what they can do to get that big internship, get the perfect grades, get the fast-paced job they want, and in general get ahead of everyone else in life. in your eulogy, however, this will not be the things that will be important. the important things will be your impact on the lives of your peers and the good things you do for the world around you. when i breathe my last breath and it is time for a eulogy to be written about me and the life i lived, i hope it focuses on how i helped my family, friends, community and those in need. in the first week this semester, we focused on the question “what life am i living.” this is a very important question to reflect on, especially in regards to what you want on your eulogy. the article that we read from ideas.ted.com why we need to slow down our lives suggests: “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) this quote is in response to what the author saw during their trip to google’s headquarters. the author was fascinated to see trampolines and creative spaces in an office of a highly successful company in charge of vast amounts of data and innovation. it seems that the companies that drive the world forward at the fastest pace have discovered that time without screens and the internet helps to promote creative thinking and motivate workers. i agree with the findings of this article, and do my best to avoid getting sucked into the world of screens. i can make myself happier and probably live a better life by balancing work with spending time with people i enjoy and doing things i enjoy. we watched a video for the second week of moreau about father hesburgh. my favorite part of the video was when the moderator said “this whole committee was a put on, and here we have a couple of democrats, some republicans, and an independent priest, and we got you to agree on civil rights? and he said, mr. president, we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we are all just fishermen.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) i liked this quote a lot because father hesburgh was able to find a common hobby and use it to unite a seemingly hopelessly divided group of people. the quote brings forward the commonalities of our fellow humans and shows that even groups that were staunchly against each other were able to talk through an agreement by listening to each other and relating to them on even the smallest of things like fishing. overlooking the huge biblical https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 implications this could also have, it relates to my life because i want to be the kind of person who is remembered for bringing people together, not pushing them apart. i found the new york times article from week three to be particularly intriguing due to the different approach this nun has on death. the nun was a teacher of momento mori, which in latin means “remember your death.” this was a bit surprising because it seems like catholic teachings usually focus on resurrection and the life of the world to come. sister teresa aletheia noble stresses that since death on this world is inevitable, we need to focus more on it every day, and act accordingly with the acknowledgement that our time here is limited. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) week four was mostly about reflection, but it did have a little article which stressed: “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.” this quote strikes me the most because it reinforces my choice of major and desired career path. biology is certainly not the easiest major, and there are times that i feel that i would be better off in an “easier” major. this helps me to remember that doing what i enjoy the most is worth it even if it seems way harder than other alternatives. (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) instead of a typical reading and qqc in week five, we did an activity in which i asked my friend sam about his thoughts on me. overall it was pretty surface level things, since as a young male i am not particularly in-touch with my emotions, but it was still interesting to hear what someone else thinks i value. (“week five irishcompass activity” moreau fye week five) i was a bit intrigued by the quote: “studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content. however, grant and others have also come to realize there’s no relationship between introspection and insight. this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” from the reading for week six because it is a bit oxymoronic. it helps highlight the article’s point that simply sitting and thinking about yourself aimlessly is not always helpful, and that it is better to ponder who you are and what you want to become. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) i do not know much about the background of the story from which the chapter jurisdiction from week seven is taken, but it simply does not matter. each of his self-contained stories have vast meaning that does not require one to dig too deep to see. the story from the diner, where the two gang members are incredibly uncomfortable walking into a diner comprised mostly of “proper” families with money, is rather startling in how quickly one’s friendliness can make someone feel welcome. the waitress’s change from hostile to treating the strangers like friends eases any pre-existing tension, and brings both parties together. this is another quality https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/00223980.2010.528072 https://libres.uncg.edu/ir/uncg/f/p_silvia_evaluating_2011.pdf https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ that i strive to emulate, and hope that one day may make it into my eulogy. (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven) in the end, it will not be me who writes the eulogy that will sum up my life. therefore, it does not matter how highly i regard myself, it only matters how i help and serve the fellow humans around me. no one will remember me for money, and i will never be famous. i must work to balance my ambitions in my career with spending time on me and people i care for. kindness, generosity, and friendliness are the adjectives that i hope will truthfully adorn my eulogy. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/16529 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/16529 week 14 integration 4 jamie reintjes todd taylor moreau capstone integration loving action and calming presence amazingly, i survived my first year of college. this whirlwind of football games, chinese exams, and learning whatever economics is has been one of the best years of my life, and i want to now look towards giving back to this wonderful community that has welcomed me with open hearts and arms. as life goes on, i will commit myself to the notre dame community, fostering loving and fulfilling relationships with others, creating space for justice and trust everywhere i go. looking back at the start of the semester, i had committed myself to a daily meditation practice. unfortunately, i cannot say i was perfect in this goal, but i will not be pessimistic and say i did not achieve it. life is not easy, and even if i did not give myself the space to meditate and reflect every day, i nevertheless sought to do the best i could given the circumstances. looking back at when pico iyer said, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape,” really helps affirm that while we need rest, it is impossible to just have silence (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer – moreau week 1). sometimes the melody of life contains dissonance, other times a great fortissimo of sound that is almost deafening before silence can come, and recognizing that is enough to show that i took rests when rests where necessary and i joined in song when encouraged! the center for action and contemplation has been an organization that sends daily meditations and their mission is very similar to what i hope to achieve. promoting both active contemplation and contemplative action that promotes more fully the human person. relating this idea of action and contemplation, father hesburgh is certainly an example i hope to better emulate as he exemplifies these traits. the fact that he was a bridge for all people to come together is not only something i want to strive for, but is also something i want to actively encourage other people to do (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau week 2). father hesbrugh is such a revered person, i believe, not only because of the work he personally https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ did, but also because he inspired and cultivated other people to lovingly act in the name of justice. the act of being a bridge is at both an active and a receptive role. active in that you have to forge a connection that previously did not exist or an avenue that was not considered and passive in that as a bridge, you only act as a means for two ideas to come together. you are the foundation for which other people can take further action. this inspirational figure is something i hope to achieve, because while i struggle to consider myself as a full blown leader like a president, being someone who can advise and direct others in the right direction is something i feel is more attainable. the power of influence is one i have come to deeply respect and also rightly fear because it is a powerful force. being able to persuade others in the truest sense not only requires you to convince others to believe in a cause, but the cause must also be something that you also full-heartedly believe in. it is not simply enough to direct others to action, but you must also fully participate in this goodness you want to see in this world. and while i believe that i have taken great strides in terms of handling my pessimistic outlook, the people around me have helped encourage my own hope and i recognize that i must actively return the favor. reminding myself what ophelia dahl said, “to not be optimistic is just about the most privileged thing you can be,” i need to continue to work one seeing past the darkness of the world and find the light within it all (teaching accompaniment by steve reifenberg – moreau week 9). even considering the darkest moments of this past semester, i can look back and still feel and see the love and care that was shown to me and i can continue to hope for the goodness in people’s hearts considering the support system i have been able to find here. whether it be professors, staff, or my close friends, i am confident in their love for me and i will continue to walk this journey of life with them, sharing in that love. seeing what my friends have done for me, i wish to not only return the love they have shown me, but also extend that love to others and be open to expanding my notre dame family. cultivating a loving environment is definitely a lofty goal though, and i recognize the importance of working reflection into action. as in the article by hidden brain media, people often “will learn a lot of facts and talk about those facts. they will participate in a kind of craft,” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit (passion isn’t enough by hidden brain media – moreau week 11). it is all fine and dandy for me to be talking about being a good person, and i am taking the first step in being a good person by reflecting on what it means to be a good person, but it ultimately requires some form of action to show that i am a good person. and i think right now, the first action i want to take is thanking you, professor taylor, for the past semester. not only have you been a great professor, fostering my reflection on what it means to live a life well-lived, but also for the support you have given me throughout the semester. you have been a great source of inspiration in terms of what a good life can look like, and that it is perfectly okay to spend time looking for it. and the second action i will be taking is also another thank you. a thank you to my high school choir director. i am currently writing this reflection on the train to chicago before heading home for this weekend. my brother is performing tomorrow night for his spring concert, and it will also be my choir director's last performance with rockhurst high school. by coming home this weekend, i want it to be clear how grateful i am to him and his work he put into making me the singer i am today. he is yet another great inspiration in what it means to live a life well-lived, and he has shown me that it is perfectly possible to make your career something you are passionate about. it would be a missed opportunity not to be there for his last concert and to sing with him at least one more time. and so, with this final paragraph, it feels like my semester is over. sure, i have exams next week, but really and truly, my first year of college has been completed. and i could not be more excited, grateful, joyful, sad, and even a little scared about it all. excited because i know for a fact that these next three years will be amazing. grateful for all the people who have made and continue to make life awesome. joyful for the opportunities i have been given and those that still await me. sad, for time has flown by and i will soon be saying goodbye to some of my dearest friends and they start a new chapter of life without me. and of course scared, because i do not know exactly what the future holds for me. but, it is totally okay to be scared, because as my choir director told me, being scared just shows you how much you care about the thing you are going to undertake. and this life is going to be the biggest and most fulfilling undertaking i am going to work for! https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ microsoft word week 14 capstone integration three.docx moreau week 14 making the most of my time here i think the first, and biggest step, to living a life well-lived is meditating or contemplating on how you want your life to change. our earlier activity with irish compass really put me on track to discern my livelihood. in my interview, i was told that you do not have to have everything figured out right when you start your career (irish compass – moreau fye week five). reevaluating my mission statement is also a huge step in my pursuit of a live well-lived. in my mission statement i include the following: “to fulfill my mission and uphold my values, i must succeed as an individual” (personal mission statement – moreau fye week thirteen). i think this statement needs some adjusting. as a selfless person, i do not think i need to focus so much on my success as an individual. instead, my success will be based on the impact i have on others. in the next three years, i also hope to pursue a life well-lived by identifying and using my strengths. in “three key questions,” father michael himes asks, “is this vocation/this role/this profession/this way of life you are considering something you are good at?” (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). i like to think that my strengths are my personable personality, my hard work ethic, and my compassion. a great example of a man utilizing his strengths is father hesburgh. in the film “hesburgh,” father hesburgh is portrayed as a great compromiser who is able to mitigate vietnam war protests but also stand with his students (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). an evaluation of my strengths was recorded by my participation in the career development reflection. upon this reflection, the results yielded that my strengths would fit well with a career in business consulting (“career development reflection” – moreau fye week four). this led me to attend workshops for firms that have consulting sectors like deloitte and kpmg. i recognize that my career discernment is an ongoing process. one of my goals as a student at notre dame is to help others. in my writing and rhetoric class earlier this semester, i was faced with a community proposal prompt. in my proposal, i proposed that notre dame have a tutoring program in conjunction with south bend highschoolers for the act and sat. in du lac, it states that “the university of notre dame strives for a spirit of inclusion among the members of this community for distinct reasons articulated in our christian tradition” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” – moreau fye week ten). going forward this summer, i want to gather all the necessary tools to start this tutoring program. this will bolster a sense of inclusion between the notre dame and south bend community. i also intend on doing future service work through notre dame to help the poor. in the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross, it shows that “our efforts, which are his [jesus], reach out to the afflicted and in a preferential way to the poor and the oppressed” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross – moreau fye week twelve). my dorm, o’neill family hall, has plenty of service opportunities with the south bend center for the homeless. i hope to take full advantage. though i hope to pursue a life well-lived, i know it will not always be easy. in his essay, steve reifenberg writes, “i think i let go of the idea that an excellent teacher stands up in front of the class as the expert with all the answers” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). at notre dame, i often fall into the trap of imposter syndrome. i feel as though i do not deserve to be at such a prestigious university. some measures i take to combat this outlook is remembering what i have accomplished and being grateful for those who have helped me along the way. in my own eulogy, i write “he was a role model for so many people in his life. he truly was a renaissance man as well” (integration three by – moreau fye week eight). reflecting on past achievements is just as important on setting future goals. another thing i struggle with is taking time out of my day to pray or simply reflect. i often feel as though life has to always be going 100 mph so that i can outcompete others. in a ted talk, pico iver explains, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iver – moreau fye week one). one method of taking breaks out of your day is practicing mindfulness. on the mindfulness menu, i have picked out that i will pray a rosary or divine mercy chaplet daily (“mindfulness menu” by the mcdonald center and campus ministry – moreau fye week six). the times that i feel the happiest are those when i get enough sleep, take time to rest, and have small moments of time to myself. in the future, i will be more cognizant of that fact. finally, pursuing a life well-lived means uplifting my voice and making sure other voices are uplifted as well. as professor paul blaschko describes it, an echo chamber is “a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). i want to be able to surround myself with a work environment, friends, and community that acknowledges everyone’s perspective. pope francis also sheds light on the importance of inclusion: “solidarity… is a free response from the heart of each and every one” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). i hope that in my future with notre dame university i can come to know and foster a unified and compassionate community. ingram 1 integration 3 bryan raeume fys moreau 4/4/22 legends never die ingram tony’s life was glorious. he was a good man who had a strong belief in morals. he worked hard and left a lasting impact on many people. i was fortunate enough to meet this man at a young age and although he might not have seen it the first time i met him i knew he was going to be a successful man. one thing i noticed he always paid attention was the use of his technology while trying to study. he lived by the quote, “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology”("why we need to slow down our lives (links to an external site.)" (pico iyer, ted) week 1). i asked him why he was so intesional about his technology usage and he said, “i’ve noticed last semester i was not too careful with my time, and i often felt overwhelmed with my workload, and i felt like i as alwaysing falling behind. one thing this semester i will be sure to incorporate is time for me to organize my work and be more efficient with my time, and i will also incorporate time for me to do other things besides studying. i think these two strategies will offer me less stress, and more joy in my second semester at notre dame. continuing, i think a big reason why i wasn’t able to accomplish some of these things this semester was because of the distraction of my phone. it wasn’t until finals week that i found i’m way more efficient and productive when i put my phone away at my desk and leave the room to get work done.” he has really inspired me to make a change for myself when i’m studying. i’ve learned that it is the intention of getting better that will make you better. tony also enjoyed doing good for other people. he lived a life of service and it seemed to fuel him. he would always recite, “i believed education had to have morals but there had to be a way to balance academics and faith. the most loyal thing i can do is be honest.”("hesburgh (links to an external site.)” (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) father jenkins week 2). tony often said to me, “i think what contributes to a life well lived is the impact you have for the good of society. i think it’s important to consider that those who serve or do good for the world and humankind are always blessed by the lord with a satisfying life well lived, as well as a place in heaven. i’ve learned that you do not need to become a priest, teacher or study a major that will ultimately give you a job where you directly serve someone. you can still serve and do good without having a profession that allows you to do so. many ways where this can happen are obvious like donating time and money to charities, becoming an activist for an issue you care about that will lead to a change for the better of humankind.” i agree with tony there are many opportunities to make a difference in the world regardless of who you are. i think what most people struggle with is the idea of selecting a job or major to study that will both deliver them with the necessity to live a financially comfortable life, yet also satisfies their life. he’s shown me how important servitude was and how lovely life can reward you with the act of giving. early on in college i would always catch him jumping between majors and contemplating what to major in, and i always thought it was because he was trying to find the perfect profession where he could make the biggest impact. tony would often ask himself questions like, “where am i headed, where do i want to end up?”( "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die (links to an external site.)" (ruth graham, ny times)week 3). he thought about these questions a lot because he thought it was really interesting to think about while in school. he would often say he was struggling to make a decision about what makes him happy. “it’s really causing a lot of confusion because i need to make important decisions about my future, but i feel like i can't say what major i want right now because i have no clue.” he often utilized the “three key questions” which allowed him to navigate through these hardships and challenging times. “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path. granted there are certain career paths namely accounting and engineering fields for which it is valuable, if not necessary, to have a certain sort of educational background, but the list stops there.”(“navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career development week 4). when tony was at notre dame he really struggled with his career discernment. he felt intimidated, and unsure of what to do in terms of career discernment. i think he felt this way because his current career path plans were always changing. he taught me that you can partake in many jobs with any major, and there is always the option of heading back to school to chase another career path. i also remember him saying the only way to know is to “test the waters through trial and error.” this would make him feel like doing the right thing, and being constructive with his discernment by understanding that wanting to switch majors, and trying other options is good. one time tony had asked me , what do you think i most value and desire in life? and why? to which i responded, “i think you desire to be happy, and to help others. through our relationship i’ve noticed that you are happier, and in better moods when you either help someone or do something you love consistently. i think this is because you are very caring, and want to make an impact in someone's life.” tony had an eye for seeing the best in people, but also he could see what they needed to improve on. he always told me don’t be too hard on yourself he always referred to this study the suggested, “ asking “why?” in one experiment appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems instead of moving forward."the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) (links to an external site.)" (tasha eurich, ted conferences week 6) i believe that some personal obstacles that are in my way of living a well lived life is something that i often struggle with. i think i am evaluating myself too much and because of this i struggle to stay positive all the time. i worry about all the things i’m not doing, but i should be focusing on all the things i have done. recently, i have been running and gunning in each of my classes, and this has caused me to constantly worry about all the work i’m not getting done. i also think that this stress and downgrading thoughts make me more upset and impatient and this causes me to push those i care about the most away from me. i think reading tony’s eulogy has allowed me to remember that i’ve armed myself with the tools to be a more positive person, and be happier with my life here at notre dame. i’m excited to implement some of these things into my schedule and start becoming more eqanted to my schedule at notre dame just like mr.tony once had. tony enjoyed his experiences at notre dame, and one thing he told me was the relationship he made will last forever. i asked him, “how do you know” to which he responded,“one cannot love unless it is at their own expense.”( “why the only future worth building includes everyone (links to an external site.)” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences)week 7). tony would say, “i think any type of relationship constitutes a life well lived. i say this because if you’re well acquainted with many people that means that many people enjoy your presence and your impact on them.” i agree with him, and i think if this is the case, your life has been well lived because you’ve positively impacted people throughout your life which has led to an increase in pleasure to society. i believe this really only holds true if you’re able to sustain the relationships you have, and they are healthy. i think it’s possible to have relationships that can be bad and can constitute a life that has not been well lived. for me, i know i have succeeded in a solid relationship when i can feel comfortable and just enjoy myself around this particular person. one thing i struggle understanding, but i believe is that just because you and another person do not have a good relationship doesn’t mean that either of you are bad. it just means the relationship isn’t right for you. tony will forever be missed, but always will be remembered for his wise viewpoints of specific topics of discernment. he made it to the promise land, and i have no doubt that he’s legacy will not die simply because legends never die. name: course: moreau first year experience, fys 10102-106 instructor: prof. catherine wagner date: march 4, 2022 integration three prompt: write a letter to your younger self, explaining the characteristics of a life well-lived, using the integrative learning skills. letter to my younger self, about a life-well lived dear younger self, how are you doing? i admire all your efforts to make yourself a better and more successful individual. keep being you. i hope that this letter finds you well. if not, i want you to stop worrying about anything deterring you from being happy because you will be fine. trust me, i would know. you must be wondering, for what reason must i be writing you? well, i am writing you talk to you about something essential, which i want you to think and reflect on a lot, every now and then, as you grow older. i am writing to discuss what a life well-lived entails, explaining its characteristics. i will also reference works and examples by transformational individuals to help paint a vivid picture of the definition of a life well-lived. i would like you to pause now and grab a piece of a4 paper and a pencil. on the paper, i would like you to take a moment to sketch a picture of what comes to mind when you think of a life welllived. there are no boundaries; own your drawing. when you are done reading this letter, i would like you to reflect, flip the paper, and make a new drawing of the same. afterward, analyze, compare, and contrast both illustrations. how do we define a life well-lived? if you surf the internet, you will find so many definitions for what a life well lived is. while all of those are valid, you will realize that most definitions have similar messages and even words. they express that a life well-lived is lived at an excellent standard level by one’s degree. they primarily connect this to being successful, having an enjoyable career, and outstanding work-family-life balance. while this definition is true, i would like to give you a definition i came up with from the drawing i did in college (similar to the one you just did) when asked to illustrate a life well-lived. i know you must be curious to find out what drawing i made. i drew a man in space with a bulb in him, whose light illuminates and shines on the rest of the world. from this and upon reflection, i defined a life well-lived as one that entails leveraging one’s knowledge, talents, skills, opportunities, and resources to be a force for good by striving to create a positive impact and the lives of those around them. this way, that individual will further be able to leave their footprint on the soil of time and thumbprints on the pages of life, inspiring others who come after them to strive toward being a force for good. after coming up with this definition for a life well-lived, i reflected a lot on the kind of life i am living and how i have been living. during that period, i read an article by pico iyer that talked about why we need to show down our lives. let me give you a brief analogy. picture yourself as an adventurist embarking on a journey through a large desert or wilderness, trying to find your way to an oasis. you have nothing on you but a map and a compass. if you don’t pause, at proper intervals, to look at your map and the compass to ensure you are moving in the right direction, you’re most likely going to get lost or take a way longer time to get to the destination. similarly, when moving through life, we need sometimes to slow down. in the article, iyer talked about mahatma gandhi’s friends being astounded that he would not be meditating for an hour on a uniquely busy day as he usually does. however, they soon realized that he would be meditating for two hours instead since the day would be stressful. he wrote, “yet, it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who need to give themselves a break” (iyer). i learned a lot from that line as someone involved in a lot and is frequently very busy. it is vital to slow down sometimes and reflect on your journey so far, your strategies, and many more as you accomplish the goals you have set out. another aspect i was curious about was understanding what inspires a life well-lived. soon you are going to join the university of notre dame, one of the best universities in the world. there you will learn about a man called father. ted hesburgh, a leader who did live a life well-lived. i had the opportunity to learn about his life through films, videos, and books i found on the notre dame campus. the president of the university in my freshman year, father jenkins, explained that "father hesburgh could talk across differences; created trust, created mutual understanding. that's the kind of leader we need today" (hesburgh film). i urge you to do your research into diverse people who had a well-lived life, intending to understand how they could have such a fulfilling life and learn from their experiences, character traits, and values. as you go through life, you will have to make many decisions. for instance, when you get to college, you will have to discern what major or career path you would like to pursue. in making those decisions, i recommend that you go easy on yourself. while it is a brave thing to decide for oneself by one's self, i want you to know that there's nothing wrong with letting yourself be inspired by others or involving other people in your decision-making process. father himes, from notre dame, touched on this in one of his writings. he explained that "other people help us discern whether we are good at what we do. this is enormously important because often we are not the best judges of what our talents and abilities are" (fr. himes, pg. 2). so, be open to letting yourself be inspired by others. as you navigate through different journeys, there may be obstacles along the way. however, i want you to know that you are more than capable of beating any challenge that comes your way. additionally, there are many resources that you can utilize to solve those issues. during my major discernment process at some point in college, i wondered if i was making the right decision. i explored many resources on campus. for instance, i learned from the center for career development on campus that "there is no 'best major' out there but there is the best major for you... if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes" (meruelo). also, i engaged in different discernment activities on campus. one of them was the "irishcompass (platform) conversational activity," which helped me understand how to reach out to others, notre dame alumni to be more specific, and enlist their help and advice in my discernment process. it also helped me reflect on how much i should factor in their opinions in my decision-making. again, there is no obstacle that you cannot overcome. constantly remind yourself to stay focused on what you can do instead of complaining about things out of your control. this was something i learned from dr. jihoon kim, a leader with a disability who said, "so, i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i could not move my fingers or legs. but i begin to realize that some of the things that i can do, and the movements i have learned can be of a lesson to others" (dr. kim). similarly, i urge you also to help others learn and grow from your experiences. in conclusion, one of the most essential qualities that one must have to successfully have a life well-lived is humility. especially as one who aspires to be a transformational leader, you will find that most of the most outstanding leaders who ever lived possessed this trait. humility will take you far. pope francis explained in a ted talk, "tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility…the more powerful you are, the more your actions will have an impact on people, the more responsible you are to act humbly" (pope francis). younger self, do not be too hard on yourself and know that everything is working together for your good. works cited “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one. “hesburgh,” video produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two. “three key questions,” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three. “navigating your career journey,” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four. “irishcompass activity,” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week five. “5 minutes,” video by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six. “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven 3 march 2022 integration 3 the courage of convictions what are my convictions? i have convictions in all aspects of life; spiritual, moral, political, convictions about myself, and so on. our convictions are what separate us, what drive us, and what make us unique. with time, i have added new convictions and altered past convictions. i think that is part of the beauty of life. we grow, we experience new things and we get the opportunity to apply what we learn along the way. we should embrace change instead of fear it, and we should push for confidence in individuality. where i sometimes run into trouble with keeping my convictions is the influence of social pressures or a lack of my own integrity. i am still learning and getting mentally stronger, but i know there comes a time where i will finally have ultimate courage in my convictions. i can feel myself getting closer, but there’s always room for improvement. recognizing and bringing attention to the fact that i sometimes hold loosely to my convictions is the first step for making the necessary adjustments. when i think of the word conviction as well as having faith in convictions, i think of think and leader father hesburgh. if there is one thing that stands out to me the most about father hesburgh, it was his courage and confidence to do what he believed was right, all the time and even though other people might have not agreed with him, and even when it went against the norm. he realized the need for change in a world full of followers rather than leaders, and he did not hesitate to use the courage it took to call our nation out and demand a conversion of heart in times of historic inequality. he had no fear in encouraging people to do the right thing, even if they did not want to hear it. when we stand for our convictions, we oppose blind conformity and complacency. with the “follower” mentality, we will never get anywhere new; we will never grow. i strive to have great integrity and the courage to stand for what i believe in, and evoke change when necessary. the deresiewicz article states, “he has the confidence, the courage, to argue for his ideas even when they aren't popular.” it takes a true leader to implement these principles, and i am willing to work to get to that point. one overlying conviction that i have is that it is so important to love your neighbor, like god wants. for as long as i can remember, i have always made the effort to be a good friend and a friendly face to everyone i meet. it is the way my parents raised me. from a young age they had me and my sister involved in charity events, donation drives, and everything in between. the intrinsic value of being compassionate and helpful to those around me is something that brings me so much joy. i feel proud of myself in hopes that i have made god and my family proud as well. this overall conviction of, for lack of better words, “treating others the way you want to be treated”, rolls into my reflection of week three’s assignment, father himes’ three questions. the third question, “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?”, stands out to me the most, for reasons clearly stated above. helping others is something that has always been a big part of my life, and this is certainly one of the convictions in my life that i hold onto the tightest. on this note, i’d like to now tie in week 4’s assignment regarding mentors. i was able to relate these two assignments in respect to my convictions about the importance of helping others. i have had a number of mentors in my life, whether that be my parents, coaches, teachers, etc. i can confidently, and gratefully, say that these influential people in my life helped me get to where i am today. they served as a constant support system and they encouraged me to challenge myself and expected me, not to always succeed, but to give it all i had, whether that be on the field, in the classroom, or just in general. now that i have graciously experienced their mentorship, it is important to me that i emanate similar behavior to those who i can serve. for starters, i strive to be a mentor to my younger sister. we’re on similar paths of life, and i think it’s important that she has someone who looks out for her, and gives her someone to look up to. in addition to my sister, back home i help coach a lot of younger girls playing softball in the league that i grew up playing in. there is the aspect of giving back, but also watching the girls learn and love what they are doing. i strive to be a good mentor and role model to them as well. parks, in week 4’s reading, says, “mentors are supportive in a host of ways, including serving as an advocate, a guide to resources, a source of comfort, and sometimes a source of healing”(129). after reading this, i recognize what people have done for me in the past, and now it is a mission of mine to pass on that kindness to others. something came across my mind while constructing this reflection. it is important to stand for what you think is right, and for what you believe in, but i think there is another component that can come with our convictions. i believe that it is beneficial to keep an open mind, knowing that it is okay to learn new things and formulate different beliefs and values. our convictions may change over time. i think we can learn a lot from each other, and also learn from ourselves. i think this relates to the mindfulness aspect, mentioned in the prompt. having that awareness of new experiences is the first step into creating your valued convictions. capstone integration zuzanna kawula capstone integration april 29, 2022 be honest, be humble, and love zuzanna kawula aspires to be a woman who loves unconditionally, rejoices in life constantly, practices gratitude daily, acts justly and nourishes relationships with others invariably. with values deeply rooted and thus shaped through love and honor, she pursues a life of openness to acceptance whatever happens to cross her path, cultivation of curiosity and pursuit, as well as memorable experiences with friends, family and strangers. she further pursues a life of service and sacrifice in hope of becoming a pediatric neurologist as well as a caring, compassionate friend, daughter, as well as future wife and mother. i believe that loving unconditionally is one of the most important practices that i will and do try to practice every chance i get. in a world, where hatred and demeaning behaviors can be observed so frequently, it is vital to love everyone around us even when we don’t particularly like the person. this does not particularly mean being friends with everyone, but simply deems us to act kindly and intentionally when interacting with all those around us. frequently i go back to pope francis’ quote “i could have very well ended up among today's "discarded" people. and that's why i always ask myself, deep in my heart: "why them and not me?" (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). this quote teaches and always reminds me of all the different kinds of people living on this world. further, my catholic faith reminds me that god created them, just like he has created me with unfathomable love, care and plan for the future. the single difference is that life whether by chance, consequence, or privilege, has drifted us in varying directions. this however, does not diminish the personhood of any human being as they are still the children of the same, infinitely https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript loving god, as we are reminded with the quote “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures … scriptural accounts of jesus provide a constant witness of this inclusiveness. …the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame moreau fye week ten). so thus, i try to act intentionally, loving, and kindly with the person that i meet as i feel like with “every interaction that i have with another person, my soul lightens up a bit more with renewed love and new wisdom. thus, i tried to treasure meaningful interactions to … [become] a better self” (“integration 3” by zuzanna kawula, moreau fye week 8). going alongside that of loving all those who surround us, another virtue that i hold dear to my heart is acting justly in everything that i do. this has been a focus around the world more recently, as many activists have brought attention to the persecution and harassment of minorities around the world. during my life, i would deem it a fulfilled goal if i ever developed the courage to become such an activist that would call to action those of us that can speak up, act, and fight against those invoking violence as well as letting it slide. my motto in this regards to the quote “'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe.” by dean marcus cole, moreau fye week 12). this quote inspires me to act as i am one that can act in a sea of people who can’t. it further serves as a reminder of those who have suffered horrid violence and discrimination. in my pursuit of this, i hope to embody the characteristics of father hesburgh that did just that fight and stand against the inequalities of our society. he reminds us how he “took a stand for something, and wasn’t about to stop” (“hesburgh '' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). similarly, i aspire to be the bigger person, in whichever situation i find myself in. many times it is difficult https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1t-redclzuft4s3psaqzdv9rmmtlxc2lhfuel3kyrhxm/edit?usp=sharing https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 to understand people who have gone through experiences we have yet to or never will, such as dicrimination against someone’s race, ethnicity, etc. in these situations, i hope to act towards justice as well as accompany my friends in the best way possible as “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless. this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). through this i hope to embody compassion and hopefully pursue fruitful interactions with others. i believe that rejoicing in life consistently is also another vital habit that i hope to further cultivate in my life day-to-day. so many times i have felt like life has passed by me without taking a second to really dwell in its reality. life moves by so quickly, and if we don’t take a second to just stand, take a breath, and realize its wonderfulness, we will miss out on so much. i strive to live in the moment and to be present with everyone around her and in all her experiences. sister theresa aletheia brings this mindset in her philosophy to consistently remind yourself of your own death “as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die'' by ruth graham moreau fye week three). although quite radical, this kind of thinking urges us to be here, to be grateful, and cry from happiness about how beautiful life is. furthermore, this kind of mindset goes hand in hand with practicing intentionality. oftentimes we find ourselves in such a zone where we are constantly being distracted and not knowing what to put our time and efforts into; iyer points out that “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives'' (“why we need to slow down our https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ lives'' by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as a young adult in such a spinning world with so many gleaming opportunities, i find myself not knowing what aspirations to give my time and energy toward often bearing my doubts by wasting my time on social media and tiktok. thus, i find it to be my goal to find that single or couple pursuits that are most gratifying and enjoyable to me and not the majority. i hope to engage in and chase those few endeavors with my whole heart and mind. through only this way do i believe that i will live a self-fulfilling life. although now, i believe that i could potentially combine my passion for helping out kids with my fascination with the human body through becoming a doctor my way of serving the community (“reflection moreau week 5” by zuzanna kawula moreau fye week 5), this may change in the years to come, as i know that fascinations come and go. i do realize that this kind of pursuit of “career decision-making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center moreau fye week four). i hope to animate this mission statement in my next years through trying out different passions of mine to discern my path in the future. this introspection will not only aid me in finally finding what i want to do with my life, but will further develop my self awareness, as tasha eurich comments “ after all, what better way is there to increase our self-knowledge than to look inward, to delve deeply into our experiences and emotions, and to understand why we are the way we are?” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). through consistently being honest with myself about how i feel, what i believe serves me in life and what hinders me from enjoying life i believe that i will not only find things that interest me, and therefore my passions, but i will find friends with similar interests that will aid me in developing wisdom in those areas as well as connections with others of similar interests yet more experience. however, whilst i work on myself to embody https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1smy67_3m6fbq4anrx8vlicbkosuo-kess9mxjalazco/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ that, career-driven zuzanna, i realize that i do not mean that i would let go of the friendships that are not of my interest i believe that that would be cruel and selfish. rather, i hope to meet and become friends with people from all different circles of my life career, school, church community, music community, and many more. through developing a critical perspective on my own beliefs and thus sharing them with others of various circles, backgrounds, etc. i hope to critically converse and live in harmony with others as i believe that “we should seek out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempt to fully understand their argument. yet we also need to keep an eye on our own motives” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. baschko, moreau fye week 11). that being said, this is what i envision for my future self to do in order to pursue a life filled with joy, love, trust, and humility, or in other words a life well lived. through this discernment especially being honest with myself about what i want i hope to become the woman “of many aspirations, whose self-character is rooted in catholic and familial values that shape her being and essence ultimately radiating off of her!” (“zuzanna’s mission statement” by zuzanna kawula, moreau fye week 13). https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://docs.google.com/document/d/1x4andkvbmf6ef3m0ev_hlswyendmrlqqgmb-brp6wk4/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1x4andkvbmf6ef3m0ev_hlswyendmrlqqgmb-brp6wk4/edit?usp=sharing moreau integration loved, bona “carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. a legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.” ― shannon alder. family, friends, colleagues, we are all voyagers in the tides of life. this journey begins with the first cry when we are born and the last when we take the last breath. the adventures of the life that i have lived are defined by various stages of my life and the desire to believe it was a life well-lived, which is ironic as i question the life i have lived. responsibility is bestowed upon us at an early age, as a lot is expected. growing up, dreams of having a better future fuel the ambitious beast-mode in one and hope for the best. this is because the future is uncertain and clinging onto these dreams gives us a sense of purpose and “which means we’re never caught up with our lives.” according to pico iyer, why we need to slow down our lives is due to the fact that we end up missing out a lot around us while embedded in looking for a better tomorrow that we forget living in the moment. i personally experienced “burnout” during my high school, which led to depression, and only a few noticed. this hurt more as i was unable to slow down and enjoy the relativity in life and, as a result, subjected myself to suffering. i was suffering from things that i could not achieve no matter how hard i tried. new language and a new place; it was not easy for a motivated and high-achieving student like me to give up everything in my home country and start everything again. however, even though i was hurt and did not have any energy to move forward, i did not stop. more correctly, i could not. as a result, i missed out on the beauty of my home hawaii and accepted that my mental health was important. this was when true happiness and comfort came my way as i looked forward to creating more ideas of having meaningful breaks and taking care of myself at notre dame. the beauty in life is seen through the multiple roles attained, positions as well as responsibilities of all tasks accomplished successfully. society uses this as a measure of the kind of life that one lived. therefore, these are the very roots that inspire a life well-lived as progress is viewed. embracing the mysteries of father hesburgh integrating religion into our lives crystalizes all the inspiration needed. it was great to learn about his influential and respected life, and as i lived my life, applying various philosophical perspectives fueled the inspiration i needed. as a result, the will to achieve more projected the positivity required to push for a better future. having a noble course in life is worth living with my family and friends. this made me more ambitious. it is my belief that religion provides for neutrality and unity; hence living a peaceful, fulfilling life drove me into the desire to be a solution for prevailing social issues within the society. i am an honorable person; that is my belief. this is felt when one contemplates and meditates on death. as a result, this spikes the fear of death, and i can’t help but wonder how much fear ought to be faced. according to "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, the fear of death is inevitable. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” it becomes important to cherish the moments we live with our loved ones as death is near regardless of its timing. relying on the sentiments of sister alethia, death is scary, and the idea of leaving this world and the people i love breaks my heart. the covid pandemic drives the uncertainty as i very recently had an opportunity to think about not exactly death but something i will face when i am not in good health. after my boyfriend tested positive for covid, i experienced a high fever and body aches. however, i received messages and prayers from my friends and family, which gave me the courage to fight. every time i went through something extreme, i have people standing by my side, and this has been my strength. the years have been kind to me, as i focused on activities i love. these defined values i hold for a life well-lived. focusing on various ways to live my life is by “studying what you enjoy and get involved” (muerelo family center for career development). therefore, being a part of the school’s frc robotics team as a design head and mechanical team captain in high school instilled values and inspiration. working with robots, i felt a significant affection towards every aspect of them, from the tiniest motor to the fabrication machines to the center of gravity. even a seemingly insignificant element can significantly impact robots’ capabilities was exciting. as i designed more features and assembled more parts, i realized i had found my vocation. because of this experience, i am very certain about pursuing mechanical engineering as my major and engineering in general. looking back at my life at notre dame, i found excitement in advanced-level engineering classes and thrilling research opportunities in robot & control lab. reflecting on the values and desires of my life defines ‘in the zone” moments. here, robotics defined such moments for me as i relentlessly pushed myself to work with the best teams while pursuing my passion. in addition, i found the desire to focus on the environment and nature. being concerned with the detrimental impact humans have on wildlife drives concern. i remember on our trip to hawaii, you were visibly upset by the consistent fireworks in the area. as a result, the passion inside me sprouts the capacity to care for the environment. a classmate once appreciated my ability to forge healthy relationships through listening skills. this is nurtured through putting strong emotions off for a bit and trying to be objective and listen to each other as much as we can. in addition, self-awareness arose from values, aspirations, and “in the zone” moments. it is because my passion for robotics was definitely confirmed by a third person, and with this, barriers and challenges were non-existent. allowing self-reflection was a lens through my past. as per tasha eurich, "the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way), self-reflection led to mental health issues as most view loss of control of their lives. in my perspective, the best solution for protecting yourself from emotionally demanding situations is just quitting thinking and taking a nap. it is overwhelming as a freshman for notre dame students. this is due to highly stressful situations such as being in college life away from home. i often doubt my existence and what a meaningful life signifies; therefore, i sail through using what not why tools with a smile as everyone experiences the same. in conclusion, the characteristics of a well-lived life rely on the concept of “we.” according to his holiness, pope francis (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”), it is important that inclusivity is embraced regardless of race, religion, or country. embracing his sentiments, a life well lived characterizes self-reflection and self-caring that is embedded in human-to-human interactions. therefore, acknowledging the presence, existence, and interactions with you, my friends, family, and colleagues, i can rest knowing that my life was well-lived. bear with me in my final day as this voyage halts as i leave a mark to be remembered. reference "exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” (muerelo family center for career development) (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 4 "hesburgh produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 2 "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” (ruth graham, ny times) (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 3 "the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) (tasha eurich, ted conferences) (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 6 "why we need to slow down our lives (pico iyer, ted) (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 1 “why the only future worth building includes everyone “his holiness pope francis, ted conferences (links to an external site.) moreau fye week 7 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript final moreau 2 mfye week 14 theory of reciprocity my mission statement is based upon three foundational principles: empathy, self-confidence, and gratitude (“mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). in my opinion, i believe that by prioritizing these three ideals, then the rest of my goals and intentions in life will be fulfilled, and i will be able to live a life-well-lived. i believe in the theory of reciprocity– that you get out what you put in. this being said, i think that in order to get the most out of my life, i need to live by these three principles in my mission statement. my mission is to care and empathize with those around me because in caring about others, we can then create change. i believe that when we formulate connections with our peers, then we can get a more holistic view of the world. instead of seeing our peers as enemies, and our differences as what sets us apart, i think that we should see our differences as a uniting factor. as father hesburgh stated, “we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day we are all fishermen” (“hesburgh” by kevin abbottmoreau fye week 2). especially on campus, it’s important to recognize that everyone is the same at the core. this year was the first time that i’ve been a part of such a diverse community. this being said, i need to take advantage of getting to know as many people as possible in order to gain more perspective and knowledge of the world around me. i really appreciated dean g. marcus cole’s article. when the text stated that “just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus colemoreau fye week 12), it brought my attention to the power both our words and actions https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjbb%2biweix%2fsur74iqqsliaxbatisr2o8l2sbc0tqawsdypx2nh368dbbe9vhuynzrn974ztxiaulxzzh3mpt51yc5ylqzio84xqyqacaawcifxgekir0myz%2buox10%2btpneba9owzozijskrbbk7nbp2ifxvhsnargpw3s4sb6pzkiypiph2r8rllylnuauyonzlssp6eggmlwevsehbwvn9hp%2fujvtzpczwegd2xymty62icttmrnu56n%2buls9vqzz20gws2aspzeifpat8yi1ftuogft4btd7v98rhsvhjdxftam02u9fz40iym3keddwrltr%2bc%2bv8njq8dre6nazkcli13ojgjkz2p7jhgx3ddo12mdd4u%2f71t%2by9%2ftrgdhhfb1crcu1srje%2fblhln1guak9nhfwexlbqaknq8usvk7xvqki2atvvpdd2a%2f6r%2bxwbijm%2fxn7ij%2byxb1bded7l4ucal2eg3ld08unrxb%2b3m52ftpydpv9%2fm6zvw%3d%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=nemxeeir6%2fwwnh6nzklikomyx5scwtyibvsjd12emsrkn9p0kgqvkfc5jgfhtmc%2b3iuzmf4l%2bxq5gj5%2b545c2r6z3y28qbuafmryl6ub%2be8avajlpb3cescpeebkmq6bgvbbcvdwbhuqbbivwedoakb%2b9sfmi6axaoq1qkxtlcsiupbg8qvmbsqcng%2frvomg%2bemtlqpn0gq6l7wb0vjtdo4ubgb%2benytlarxh2u5mldeokfvy1uxqcsnl%2b9thuvx7e79vchhxyjei5jzkz7wsbf9vmo5lqabhnqld4wbsldfrbrmdnm7z4co2qoko6yhshkne5%2b8w4oy9pjo2sswpq%3d%3d https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ have on people. when we gain empathy, that’s when we’re able to create change. with notre dame providing a platform for a variety of voices to speak their truth, the university is teaching us how to hear each other. when people begin to recognize that “it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know” (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boylemoreau fye week 7), then it becomes a little easier to really push yourself out of your comfort zone and expand your circles, gaining a deeper understanding of those around you. on a similar note, empathy goes hand in hand with accompaniment. in noting that “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9), the basis of empathy is noted. in being vulnerable and open to humility, then we can break down interior walls that prevent us from connecting with our peers. especially for me, coming into this year, i was extremely nervous. i was worried that i wasn’t going to make any friends, or people wouldn’t like me the way i was; however, i learned that when i was truly myself, that was when i made the strongest connections with my peers. this concept relates to my second principle of my mission statement: knowing my own worth. in my mission statement i stated that i will seek first to find confidence in myself, so that i can then learn, grow, and respond confidently to my surroundings. in doing so, i can be a better sister, daughter, and friend. i’ve found through growing up that when i was my most insecure self, i was also the worst version of myself. that being said, i believe that by prioritizing self-confidence and being aware of my inner strengths and values, then i can be a kinder individual and appreciate more of my surroundings. while i attempted to grow up and escape my hometown for so long, i now realize that i was really trying to escape myself. when i go home https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/523775?module_item_id=167905 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit for breaks there’s no hard feelings for my town itself, but rather for the person i used to be. i realized that traveling home only helps me to recognize how much i’ve changed for the better, and how i want to grow and change even more. during week 1 we read that, “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week one). this parallels my experience with being home, and how in becoming more secure in myself, i’ve found the value and familiarity in places i once saw as uncomfortable. additionally, in coming to college i’ve created both a deeper relationship with myself and god. as learned in class, “‘you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10). in trusting god, i feel as if i’ve been able to get more out of my life, and out of myself. when we learned the difference between joy and happiness, and that “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by father michael himesmoreau fye week 3), i realized that i needed to trust my faith in order to trust myself. in doing so, i can then live a life well-lived because i’m more aware of who i am. this is important as i continue to learn and grow these next few years because “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). this way i can become more content internally, and more content externally because i will be able to enjoy what i do and who i am as i’m more present in my life. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884?module_item_id=149291 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ my last principle of my mission statement is based upon gratitude. i will start each day by practicing gratitude. in noting what i am grateful for each morning, i will be able to be more appreciative of my surroundings. i will also set goals for myself each day in order to stay motivated. i will see each setback as an opportunity, and every day as a new beginning. i will be aware that the good cannot be recognized as good without knowing what constitutes bad. during week 5 of moreau, i had a conversation with my friend, maddy. maddy told me something difficult to say, but important for me to hear, which was that “i have trouble saying no to people, and tend to not stick up for myself when i wish that i did”(“conversation with maddy” moreau fye week 5). hearing maddy say this was obviously hard, but also made me so grateful for our friendship. i realized how important it is to recognize the relationships in my life that challenge me to be a better version of myself. following this conversation, it not only helped me to recognize how i need to improve myself and how i show up in my life, but also helped me to realize how grateful i am to be afforded the opportunity to know someone like maddy. aside from gratefulness pertaining to relationships, i also want to shed light on the importance of gratitude in general. i think that i frequently tend to get caught up in the past, and it prevents me from living in the current moment. as i learned, “ ‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). in shifting my mentality to recognize what i can change in my life in order to live more presently, instead of why i might be unhappy with my situation, i realized that i need to practice gratitude. i started to write in a journal each morning as soon as i wake up, and each night before i go to bed, that tracks three things that i’m grateful for. in doing so, i can already tell that i’m getting more out of my life because i’m more appreciative. when we get stuck in a negative mindset, we get trapped where https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ we are, and lose hope for growth. “as should be clear, echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles partly because of their ability to lock us into certain world views” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). when we stay within our comfort zone and create narrow views of the world around us, we then limit ourselves throughout our lives. instead, my mission is to be more grateful for what’s around me, so that i can both challenge myself while also being appreciative of my surroundings. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s moreau integration 4 professor espeseth april 29th, 2022 a path to becoming whoever i want to be i have been blessed with an incredible gift: an education. i believe that i must strive to make the best of my education here at notre dame and take hold of the opportunities that surround me. at the beginning of freshman year, i was focused on having good grades or planning a career path that would support my financial goals. today, i believe that i should focus my energy on aligning my academic path and extracurriculars with my values and aspirations to create measurable change. i look forward to acquiring the necessary skills that will allow me to go far after college. however, skills are acquirable, but this critical time of life is one that i will never get back. i have the opportunity to explore and become whatever i want to be. when i think about who i truly want to be, i believe i want to be someone who is loved and someone who improves the lives of others. in order to pursue a life well lived at notre dame, i hope to invest in quality, life-long, and fulfilling relationships, create measurable change, and grow both spiritually and academically. over the past few months, i have spent much time discerning my major and career path. coming into college, i really had no idea what i wanted to do for a career. i felt overwhelmed and anxious about choosing my major. as i progressed through my freshman year, i realized that one’s college major does determine as much as i once thought it did. notre dame’s center for career development emphasizes that when picking a major, you are not necessarily committing to a career path (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week four). similarly, one’s career does not determine their worth or whether or not they are able to pursue a “life well lived”. in moreau week 2, we looked into notre dame alumni as “inspirations of a life well lived” ("domer dozen" by the university of notre dame — moreau fye week two). when looking at these things, it can become easy to correlate the success of your career to the meaning of life but i believe that this is a dangerous tendency. it was important for me to make the distinction between “a life well lived” and my future career. although it is possible that my career will contribute to a life well-lived, i believe that a life well-lived can be achieved regardless of one’s career choice. freshman year has brought about a lot of highs and lows. i have found that hardship and suffering is something that is both necessary for growth and ultimately inevitable. i have always found the concept of suffering challenging. i believe that it is important to examine and understand the function of suffering in the world. as jihoon kim said in his short film, “if god is good, why does he allow suffering to my life?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau week six). this is a question that i have thought a lot about over the past year. as a person of faith, i have always believed in some sort of higher power or being. the existence of suffering is something that challenges my perception of god. however, i do believe that some degree of hardship is necessary for growth. as sister alethia said, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth gram – moreau fye week three). although i faced various challenges this year, i believe these challenges have been formative for me. i feel in my heart that the challenges i have faced have allowed me to grow in ways that i would not be able to without them. one specific challenge that i have faced this year is finding the balance between academics, extracurriculars, and social life. i have found myself to be incredibly busy and i often feel obligated to constantly be doing work or studying. i appreciate the driven students i am around, but it can be easy to feel like you are falling behind or not doing enough in comparison to others. i have found that many students prioritize work at the expense of rest or self-care. i have also fallen victim to these habits. however, i believe that rest is necessary for success and the completion of quality work. in his article, “why we need to slow down our lives”, pico lyer effectively articulates the fundamental need for breaks. lyer states, says “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer – moreau fye week one). the notion of breaks and rest is something that is difficult for me to implement into my life. however, i have found that when i prioritize my sleep or allow myself to have long social breaks at the dining hall, i am able to be more productive later. this year, i have found that reaching out to others and practicing self-reflection is a powerful way to gain clarity. throughout my career discernment processes, i have talked to friends and family in order to aid my decision-making. for moreau week 5, we were encouraged to engage in a conversation with a close family member or friend in order to identify my values and vocation (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five). after speaking with my mom, i found that i find great meaning in human interaction and quality relationships. for me, a life well-lived requires investment in others and human-centered work. at the beginning of freshman year, i was a pre-med major. i quickly found that my interests lie elsewhere. as i further discerned where my curiosity lies, i found myself interested in the study of global affairs. as i explored the curriculum in the keough school of global affairs, i found myself excited about what would be to come in the next four years. i am passionate about the complex global issues that press our world and country today such as global inequality, refugee crises, global health issues, and environmental challenges. in my global affairs class this last semester, i have learned about the large-scale issues within current development practices. when discussing the hardships that people face, pope francis said “i often find myself wondering why them and not me?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted conferences and pope francis – moreau fye week seven). when learning about some of the world’s most impoverished nations and some of the most pressing global issues in my classes, i often find myself feeling the same way. although i will never have the answer to that question, i have learned about the importance of accompaniment when addressing global issues ("teaching accompaniment" by professor steve reifenberg — moreau fye week nine). rather than speaking for others, we must work to empower others to speak for themselves by giving them the platform to do so. to me, a life well-lived is one where i am able to create measurable change. i am passionate about human rights, social justice, and equity and hope to use my education in some way for the betterment of marginalized communities. however, as emphasized by hidden brain media, “passion isn’t enough” (“passion isn't enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week eleven). rather, we must actively participate in bringing about change. as a student from minneapolis, the murder of george floyd has really stuck with me. i am now taking classes to learn more about the relationship between race and policing in the united states. in his article, dean g. marcus cole says “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole — moreau fye week twelve). i recognize the incredible privilege i have and i believe that i am responsible for using my breath to make change. this change begins with education and a commitment to learning about the current oppressive systems in place. in her book, white fragility, robin diangelo addresses these issues and why it is so difficult for us to talk about race (“why it's so hard to talk to white people about racism" by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). she emphasizes that racism is largely a result of a deeply-flawed system that reinforces inequality and racial superiority. my definition of a life well-lived continues to evolve and change. in reality, there is no perfect definition of a life well-lived. during my time here at notre dame, i hope to continue shaping my own personal definition of a life well-lived. right now, a life well lived is one where i engage in fulfilling relationships, create measurable change, and continue to grow. untitled document moreau first year experience week 8 integration three mike 2/26/22 : friendly, faithful, and forward friends, we gather here today in remembrance of brody patrick whalen. while this death is one of sorrow and tears, it is one of great celebration. i can not remember a time when i remember seeing brody act ungrateful for everything that he had in his life. it was because of his gratitude that brody always wanted to give back to those who had helped him along the way. and while he surely experienced ups and downs like many of us do, he consistently looked at the bright side. although we will miss him dearly, i am sure that we are all thankful for the many ways in which he tried to make our lives a little bit brighter. brody was not always the most outgoing person. however, he was almost always the most thoughtful. even if you could not tell, he was thinking about you. his tenure as a medical professional truly allowed him to do what he loved: giving back. but, brody did not just stop there…he never did…he always went beyond, even if it requires great sacrifice. he regularly volunteered to help his fellow physicians in their own cases. his service to the community came from his desire to “always take the smallest piece of cake,” which was a phrase that his dad consistently repeated to him as a kid. the only thing that was more important to brody than giving back was his family. his family was very close, which gave him the opportunity to receive advice from a number of different perspectives. his mom taught him that having fun and meeting others is often just as important as hard work. his dad taught him that hard work will pay off, and that “humility rules” (humility rules, father augustine, a monk of saint louis priory school abbey). his brother taught him that taking time for oneself is crucial to being able to interact with others in a meaningful way. his grandma taught him that patience is truly a virtue, and how important putting oneself in others’ shoes is. by implementing these diverse perspectives into his life, i am confident that brody died a joyful man. not only a happy man, but a joyful man…grateful for life, and the experiences which he had. growing up in saint louis county, brody was always very active. he was constantly outside, or off hanging with the neighbors. he loved the faith life at priory, which was only expanded after his conversion to catholicism. simultaneously, he thoroughly enjoyed his time with the priory cross country and track teams. however, his childhood in the county did not prevent him from exploring the world. after a notre dame education, brody became well aware of the great opportunities that existed beyond 63131. he traveled europe before attending mizzou medical school, having an abundance of unique experiences along the way. these encounters with the world only strengthened his desire to become a physician. after achieving his goals, brody settled down with his lovely wife jane doe. brody and jane started a family, and thrived as parents for decades. growing older, brody’s connection with his family only strengthened. he regularly invited his children and grandchildren over for cookouts. when he reached retirement, brody filled his time with family, church, bingo, and hot tubbing. although this may have appeared to be the happiest time of brody’s life, he truly missed the individuals that he encountered when working. in short, brody loved doing. he had a unique mindset: work hard by yourself so that you may later have the opportunity to help others. i know that not many of you had the chance to get to know brody on an incredibly deep level. the few of you who did know that he truly loved the opportunities that he was given. throughout the struggles that he may have faced, he always kept pushing toward perfection, all while keeping a subtle smile on his face. you all are here for a reason. and with that comes my ability to tell you this: was incredibly grateful to have you in his life, and was even more grateful for all that you did for him. he truly believed that the people he surrounded himself with earned his accomplishments as much as he did, if not more. on behalf of the appreciative soul of brody patrick whalen, i thank you all for being here today…he is truly grateful for each and every one of you. moreau experience: this integration reminded me of one of my moreau reflections in particular. during week one, we were prompted to practice “self-reflection” after reflecting on the benefits of slowing down our lives (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the mcdonald center for wellbeing exercise allowed me to reflect on my entire life up to that point, as well as narrow in on my notre dame experience thus far. through that exercise, i emphasized all of the support systems that i implemented into my studies and extracurriculars. for example, one of the questions https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40377/modules/items/143369 on this form was “who or what supported you this semester?”. i have always been a rather grateful person. my family often tells me that i thank people too much! however, this exercise allowed me to narrow in on the individuals who had helped me in life, and how exactly they assisted me. for this reason, i emphasize my gratitude for these people in my eulogy. upon writing the eulogy integration, i could not help but think of my certain death. although death is a scary, mysterious topic for me, i learned about a new, accepting approach to death from moreau fye week three. in the new york times article titled “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three), i learned that death ought to be an accepted step in our “life,” rather than a harsh end. while i still found this approach to death rather difficult, i began to think about how i want my life to go up until that point. i particularly hope that people remember me as someone who was grateful for the opportunity to interact with them on any level. especially during college, many individuals have helped me. for example, teachers, tutor groups, classmates, roommates, and many others have directly helped me in my studies, extracurriculars, and life in general. because of this, i try to send thank you emails or write thank you letters to people that i believe have truly gone out of their way to help me. after completing moreau fye week three, i started to think about what it is i want to do with my life so that when i do die, i will be content. i have always had a passion for the hospital. i used to follow my dad around the hospital when i was younger, and i absolutely loved it. as i grew older, experiences like this became less and less frequent. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40377/modules/items/143393 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40377/modules/items/143393 i believe that it is because of this rarity of certain activities as i grew up that caused me to be so appreciative of the opportunities that i am given. as these hospital experiences grew to become rare, i realized that the hospital is where i want to be. the fact that i was a four year old in scrubs and lightning mcqueen crocs did not stop anyone from interacting with me at the hospital. i was always grateful for the nurses and patients that talked to me and made me feel noticed even as a four year old. experiences such as these made moreau week four easy, as i have been “navigating [my] career journey” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week four) for fifteen years now! i hope to make others feel noticed in the hospital like those nurses and patients did when i was doing rounds with my dad. because of this, i have sought out opportunities in this line of work, such as the irishcompass job navigation website (“discerning a life well-lived irish compass activity” by moreau first year experience course moreau fye week five) used in moreau week five. deciphering what one wants to do with one’s life is not an easy task, regardless of one’s upbringing. while i had the fortunate opportunity to decipher what i want to do with my life, it is not as easy for others. for example, in moreau week 6 a video discussed the life of dr. jihoon kim (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). unfortunately, he was in an accident early on in his life, which hindered him from opening a sushi restaurant of his own, a dream he had since he was a kid. however, this incident turned out to be less unfortunate than one may think, as he went on to receive his phd. he used what god gave him to create the best out of a unique situation. while his physical condition may limit him from doing something such as https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40377/modules/items/143452 kicking a soccer ball, it did not stop him from pursuing an exciting life full of wonder and meaning. likewise, one of my limitations comes with my natural intelligence. i am farthest from the smartest person, especially when it comes to being a student at notre dame. but, like dr. kim, i try to not let that define me, and persist beyond the limitations i may have. for me, a difficult chemistry class did not limit my passion for becoming a medical professional. although it may have proven to be a limitation at times, i did not let it become a deciphering factor in my life. in fact, i am grateful for having gone through this experience. it has made me even more grateful for the easier chemistry class that i am in right now! like dr. kim, i tried to create the best out of a difficult situation, which made me incredibly grateful for the new opportunities that i have now. from the story of dr. kim, i thought to myself how fortunate i am to hear of humbling encounters like this. dr. kim’s father helps him do many of the physical things that he can not do by himself. the world can often seem full of worry and hate. however, the people one surrounds oneself with make life that much more meaningful. as pope francis noted in his talk, “the only future worth building includes everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted moreau fye week seven). like i said before, i am incredibly grateful for the people that have helped me along “the way.” i truly believe that my successes come from others. i am fairly confident that i would not be at notre dame without my family. they have given me the balanced support system that i needed in order to thrive in the different areas of my life. i believe that father hesburgh perfectly embodies this statement, as well. he came into notre dame and immediately made a huge impact because of the diverse group of individuals that he knew, such as martin luther king jr., numerous presidents, and a number of https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript cardinals. he was able to improve different aspects of both notre dame and the world as a whole through the connections that he made. through this film, i learned the importance of connections with others. many of father hesburgh’s accomplishments were expanded upon with the help of some of his friends. after watching the “hesburgh” movie in moreau fye week two (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week two), i realized what it really means to be content at death. father hesburgh made such an impact on other people, and truly took time to get to know the people around him. by the time he died, one could really tell how grateful he was for the relationships he made, which is exactly how i want people to remember me. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 integration three integration three: : a man who changed many lives on today’s unfortunate day we have lost a person who changed many in his life. a man who was a son, lover, leader, motivator, and friend to everyone he encountered. he always found a way to connect with others, how to make them laugh and be comfortable. i decided to spend the last 7 weeks with angel and learned and understood how and why he lived a well-lived life. during our first week together he taught me self-reflection, i came to understand that for me to begin to live a well-lived life i must first be at peace with myself. angel would talk about how self-reflection was a topic that he was familiar with since he practiced and trained both mental and physical meditation throughout his high school days. he would ask me to meditate, and he would tell me to reflect and think deeply of not only myself but of others. and during this time process, i realized that not only is the human body supposed to relax it must also restrict itself from negative thoughts and even people. it what a quote that angel took to heart that states, “the need for a space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (text: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted), week 1 practicing self-reflection) and throughout these meditations, i learned and understood that relaxation is necessary for the body to heal and prepare itself for the upcoming days. self-reflection permits us to check out our thoughts, emotions, feelings, and activities. it helps us become better human beings, like angel. during our second week together, i learned about individuals who changed the world, and who was a motivation to angel to live a well-lived life. i also learned what the true meaning of a well-lived life was. angel said that “life is about helping others and cherishing the opportunities given to change the world for good.” in one of his many stories, he told me about father https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ hesburgh. angel felt a very strong connection to father hesburgh and his wanting of change in the world. both didn’t let discrimination nor segregation stop him from their overall goal. angel saw father hesburgh as an inspiration to construct a non-profit organization for the latino community in rural and low-profit communities. angel wanted to aid and help students and families from south bend financially, socially, and academically. he understood that the latino community is under limited situations and he wanted to help. angel told me a quote from father hesburgh that resonated with him, “we are all created in the image of god, we are all equal in god’s eyes” (video: "hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley, week 2 inspirations of a life well-lived) as a religious and minority student angel felt that there was still much work needed to be done. individuals such as angel and father hesburgh were people who impacted and are still currently impacting society for a greater change in the future world. their wanting of good in this world helped future generations understand and come to peace with one another. our third week was different than all the other weeks as angel introduced me to a viewpoint of asking questions related to a well-lived life. this was to ensure i was on the correct path of accomplishing my end goal. angel would say that a well-lived life comes down to three questions. the first question is, “am i making a change either to myself or someone else? the second question is, “did i learn anything from yesterday’s day? and if so, am i making changes to perfect that skill or problem? the last question is, “am i making my siblings follow a path of success, and if so, how do i need to make life better for them and future generations? angel never owned expensive nor luxurious items as he believed strongly that “the materialistic materials wear off, aesthetics become old, and riches and power end when we die. however, what doesn’t die is the legacy and inspiration you leave during your journey of life” angel https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 believed that, “two key virtues are crucial to give oneself away: wisdom and courage. wisdom is more than knowledge and wisdom preeminently knows that the other is other.” (adapted from fr. michael himes, week 3 questions of a life well-lived) “having the courage to make a change in this world is for me a well-lived life.” angel understood the true meaning of a well-lived life. angel accomplished what 90% of the world population can’t do. during our fourth week, angel taught me to dive deeper into what it means to live a well-lived life. i had to become aware of different ways i can help others or ways i can connect with others that have or are living a well-lived life. angel understood that a well-lived life is one that had an impact whether big or small on society or even a single person. however, how can one know what their dream or ideal life is? angel would always say that “a well-lived life is one that was impactful towards yourself and the community around you. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (text: "navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) in a new window, week 4 exploring a life well-lived) i remember angel telling me about a teacher in highschool whom he admired so much as she never gave up on her goals. despite it taking her three years to finally decide on her specific career she is now happy teaching calculus 1 to high schoolers. angel acknowledged that she didn’t let society or others' judgment let her go through a path that was not for her. angel knew that the decision on what career he wanted to pursue was decided before he entered college. he wanted to become an architect since he was 5 years old. i recall his mother telling me that he loved playing with legos as he would design the most interesting and eccentric designs. angel, was a person who despite knowing his major at a young age still helped and motivated others to choose their ideal path. many called him counselor angel as he was always giving advice to other students and he did it with a smile every single time. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ during our fifth week together, he did something different. he gathered as many individuals as possible and had a small gathering/conversation with us about his dillion retreat that changed how he viewed the world. the conversation angel would say was “between dillion upperclassmen, father joe, and myself. the conversation was about ourselves and our connection to the catholic faith.”however, angel told us that he was not catholic, we all saw him in confusion as he went to explain why he decided to attend this gathering. he would say that the reason why he attended was that he understood that silence was key to the understanding of god’s plan and time management to connect with god on a deeper level was important to a well-lived life. however, throughout the retreat, angel would say that he came to understand and understood from others that he was a person who is against silence. he was a person who would rather use that time to help someone in need. angel believes that what stretched his awareness of himself was that he grew up in an environment where helping others was a normal part of life. this environment taught him that by helping others you are doing god’s plan without the need for silence. he was different and he was okay with being different. he used all his time to help others, yet he always found a way to connect with god. during our sixth week together, angel talked about obstacles that are all around us. how we react and act against them will be determined by the amount of patience, discipline, knowledge, desire, and pain we are willing to invest. one of angel’s obstacles is was his idea of perfectionism. angel grew up in an environment where if something was not done to its perfect form then it was incorrect. perfection became a killer of creativity and vitality in his life. however, he became conscious of the fact that no one is perfect nor anything for that matter. angel understood that life is more than just a “perfect path”, and that in this path there will always be obstacles that we must overcome. he responded against this obstacle by trying new things and letting go of his expectations. for angel, a well-lived life must go through failures. angel told me about a video about an individual that he saw that inspired him to become better. dr. kim, despite his circumstances, started his ph.d. study in 2016. after graduation, taught at denver seminary as an adjunct professor. dr. kim states, “but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering from god.” (video: “5 minutes” (aria swarr, grotto), week 6 obstacles to a life well-lived) life is meant to be full of failures and not perfection as angel once thought. life is full of pain and suffering but it is your determination that sets you apart from others. your determination is what makes you successful. angel despite this pain changed the lives of so many people. and thanks to him and other individuals our world has the opportunity to be better. and our final week together, week sixth, was about the relationships one makes throughout his well-lived life. angel was known by many individuals throughout the world. however, one of pope francis's speeches connected with angel on a deep level as they both had the same mentality and morals. angel would say that our mentality of materialistic objects is limiting us from understanding the truth of today’s world. angel would quote pope francis staying, “only by educating people to true solidarity will we be able to overcome the "culture of waste," which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems which, without even realizing it, are now putting products at their core, instead of people?”(video/text: “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences), week 7 relationships of a life well-lived) angel agreed with this statement as unfortunately, our society has grown focused on money and riches controlling how one must be seen or act. angel knew that society has grown apart from https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript the section of community and peace. angel understood that we must educate our future generations to have a future of peace and community or else greed will be the end of our society. angel encouraged many to start educating our youngsters at home where the hierarchy starts. what a parent or guardian does, so will his child in the long run. angel, despite his past and his obstacles, knew and understood what a well-lived life was. his messages inspired many others and will continue to inspire others in the future. angel was someone who loved others and loved the world around him. he never gave up, and so i say these final words as a thank you to my friend, angel. thank you, and know that your legacy is strong and will remain forever. you did it, angel, you accomplished it. (about 1950 words) eulogy mia mcloughlin moreau first year experience professor erik oswald 4 march 2022 integration three: pockets of peace mia shu jing marilyn mcloughlin had many names. “mia” was given by her parents when she was adopted. “shu jing” was given to her by the orphanage and had always been dear to her heart. “marilyn” was the name of her maternal grandmother, someone whose goodness that she always tried to emulate. although these distinct names have value in themselves, their deeper meanings cannot be examined without taking time to appreciate the nuances that each of them holds. we can think of human life in the same way. it is easy to allow the day-to-day challenges that we face to characterize our lives; however, we must realize that there is good even in the worst of times. pockets of peace exist everywhere–especially in our hectic lives. life is about the little moments, the natural enjoyments, and the delight we take in the company of others. although mia lived a life full of experiences, the time in which she developed her beliefs the most was when she took moreau first year experience at notre dame during her freshman year. she learned that there is more to life than purely academics and achievement. a life well lived is one in which we take time to stop and appreciate everything. there is always something to be grateful for. when mia was growing up, it was obvious that she had an “intense need for loyalty” and was “passionate about everything she did”, (conversation with mary mcloughlin, february 6, 2022, moreau fye week 5). this was manifested in various scenarios throughout her childhood such as when she absolutely refused to pick out an american girl doll because she felt as if she were betraying her favorite stuffed bunny, named booey. furthermore, mia refused to go to preschool because she did not want to leave her family (she indeed won this fight and did not go). the relationships that were most important to her were not only her family, but everyone she had ever met. throughout her time at notre dame, she always tried to be a part of “...[creating] loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart, ” because she believed that it was imperative to be a friend to everyone ("tattoos on the heart" – moreau fye week 7). she knew that for many, it is so easy to ignore those who are suffering even though we must instead take time to help them. mia believed that the relationships that are characteristic of a life well-lived are all relationships. as a human race, everyone is our family, and it is our job to protect them through any circumstance. throughout mia’s time at notre dame, her beliefs were challenged the most. unfortunately, she let her challenges overtake her ability to make friends and forge new relationships, something that was so dear to her when she was little. as it says in the hesburgh film, “it’s impossible to have a complete human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human success,” (“hesburgh film'' produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). during her freshman year, mia faced significant challenges when it came to finding her place. her troubles began before welcome weekend commenced. while every other freshman was moving into their dorms, mia was taking a math placement exam. she was beyond confident that she would pass given that her major was applied and computational mathematics and statistics. in high school, she was the illinois state math team champion for 2020 and 2021. how could she possibly fail a calculus i exam? much to her astonishment, her worst fear came true. unfortunately, mia had made being good at math one of her hallmark traits. however, this was unhealthy because, “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall, “ ("navigating your https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ career journey" – moreau fye week 4). the applications of this quote hold true not only in a career sense, but in the overall scheme of life. it is impossible to live a fulfilling life when you are constantly preoccupied with one part of millions that make up who you are. although mia was absolutely crushed, she knew that she had to persevere through the disappointment and move onto conquering her next challenge. instead of asking herself why she failed, she instead thought about what she could have done differently. as it is said, “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future,” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich phd – moreau fye week 6). despite her unrelenting desire to succeed, mia’s entire first semester at notre dame was still tainted by a lack of confidence. she quickly fell victim to imposter syndrome. instead of enjoying her time making new friends and the gorgeous weather outside, she locked herself in her dorm to study. mia felt as if she could just do better, get a higher grade, that she would be happier. at the time, she didn’t realize that she already had so much to be happy about. she got into her dream school, had the best roommate in the world, and had already developed such an amazing system of support who was always there for her. thankfully, at the start of second semester she realized that she may have not felt “happy” at every moment, but she was always filled with joy. happiness can certainly be fleeting, and can quickly change, while “joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life,” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). she quickly changed her mind set and found happiness in the smallest things. the sound of airplanes reminded her of her home in chicago. the squirrels reminded her of her grandfather and the birds of her grandmother. mass every sunday was just like how she and her https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291?module_item_id=144741 dad would always go together. joy overflowed her heart, and she would never turn back to a life of ignoring the little things that make life so rich. the sadness she felt about her math exam no longer occupied her mind. mia’s obsession with getting perfect grades dissipated (don’t worry, she still aimed for a’s, but not at the expense of her heart). instead, she made more time for finding pockets of peace. it is necessary to slow down our lives because “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape,” (“why we need to slow down our lives'' by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). the extra hour she used to spend studying was now dedicated to calling her family. staying up an hour later to read just one more chapter was now time she spent laughing with others. the last-minute review sessions before an exam were now when she would eat a meal she previously would have skipped. mia found herself being able to focus on relationships once again, something so important to her since her childhood. mia turned her rough start of college into a life lesson. from that point on, she always looked for pockets of peace within her life. she found joy in everything and everyone. she always tried to be a friend to everyone and was relentlessly loyal to them. although life was not always sunshine and rainbows, she tried her best to live a life well lived–one in which we take time to stop and appreciate everything. mia never forgot that there is always something to be grateful for. https://ideas.ted.com/author/pico-iyer/ https://ideas.ted.com/author/pico-iyer/ integration capstone 4/29/2022 living for others and living for me my mission in life is to be a light for others (moreau fye week thirteen) and this is very much related to my three defining traits. in my eulogy from week eight, i took away three defining characteristics about my life that carried me through my life: i work hard, i am loyal, and i am a natural leader (moreau fye week eight). i hope to serve others, lead by example, and never let anyone down by doing anything but giving it my all. and so far, i have done a pretty good job at this, participating in army rotc, being a strong student journalist for the observer, and striving to become more involved on all three campuses in the tri-campus. continuing to do this, and growing in my time at notre dame, i believe my life will be welllived. a guiding person as someone who has set an example doing all the things i am striving to do is father hesburgh. from the documentary in week two, we learned about his selflessness. “father hesburgh was asked to join martin luther king in chicago. he wasn’t worried about the controversy… his only response was, ‘when do you want me there,’” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). hesburgh’s selflessness, displayed in his memoir “god, country, notre dame,” which i read before committing to the gateway program, is a large reason for why i knew notre dame was the right mission for me to follow. this class has done a great job at showing the importance of loving others, despite what our instincts may first tell us. “i discovered that it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know,” (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). the lesson in this passage relates to hesburgh’s mission: love others, advocate for https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/files/523827?module_item_id=167955 others, but understand that everyone is human at the end of the day regardless of what side they are on. in the digital age, too, this is important for us to avoid falling into echo chambers on the internet. “first, of course, we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree,” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). another instance where i had the realization that notre dame produces service-focused citizens was when i read dean g. marcus cole’s “i am george floyd” piece as the country erupted into protests over that incident of tragedy, and again for this class’s week twelve. “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us,” (“i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). cole eloquently proves that we must do something with the voices that we have, because one seemingly small incident in a corner of the country clearly effects everybody. this is something i knew notre dame would instill in me. at the same time, notre dame is a project on its own with things to improve on by using its own methods of service upon itself. one area, i believe, is its attitudes towards the lgbtq+ community. it’s mission claims to be doing a good job with this issue. “we value gay and lesbian members of this community as we value all members of this community. we condemn harassment of any kind, and university policies proscribe it. we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish,” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame – moreau fye week ten). this mission statement upset, me, because i felt that notre dame was not living up to it and should do better. my attentiveness to accountability, i learned in this course’s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ discernment activity, is noticed by people close to me. essentially i called my friend cj and he told me how much he respects this, but i also learned that he gets concerned with how i treat my body as i attempt to handle the high stress and high involvement of my college experience (“discernment conversation activity” –moreau fye week five). taking care of myself, i think, has posed the greatest challenge to me this year—and this is saying a lot. often times, before waking up early for rotc physical training, i’ve had to meditate in order to calm my mind down, something this class talks a lot about. for one, we must calm down by sitting still. “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). finding that divine purpose is so essential to our mental health. and improving mental health, it seems, is less about learning “why” bad things happen, but simply looking at the “what”. “the lesson here: asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect,” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). challenging myself to the very essence of what i am is the only way i can be opened up to growth. also important, i’ve learned, is realizing life on earth’s limited nature. “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). week three really got me thinking about living well while i can, because though college is an investment into my future, life on earth is limited and should be always cherished. one way we can cherish life on earth is through accompaniment. “just as https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html we are inspired when we watch others accompany well, we can imagine widening circles of impact for the accompaniment framework.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). living a well-lived life, to me, is one of relationships that lead to growth. realizing that no relationship that leads to growth leads to realizing that helping others is key to helping oneself. as i focus on being loyal, working hard, and leading others, moreau has also showed me the importance of trying new things. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life,” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). college is an investment, but also a journey to fulfilling my personal mission. without trying new things—which for me consisted of the observer and joining rotc—i would be so much farther behind in this journey. with the conclusion to my first year of college coming up, i feel tired, but stronger than ever. i’ve experienced change unlike any other time period in my life, and can’t wait to go home and show my family what i’ve become. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ spring moreau fye integration three moreau integration three the life of modebola “the purpose of life is to die well.” these are words from modebola’s seminar professor, lionel jensen, who she loved and admired dearly. but what does it really mean to die well? from modebola’s life, we can see that the things you do during life, the people you connect with, and the lessons you learn are all part of what it means to not only live well, but to die well. passion, authenticity, diligence, and determination are all words that described modebola in her everyday life. she believed several components led to a life well-lived, and i will share those with you today and instances from her life those elements were present. one thing modebola valued in her life was rest. attending the university of notre dame was no smooth road--classes, exams, quizzes every week--you name it. it was hard to maintain balance in her life knowing that there was always something due the next day. but she realized that she was not a machine, and rest was extremely vital for sustainability. the week 1 moreau lesson taught her that “but even for the rest of us, it’s like a retreat house that ensures we’ll have something bright and purposeful to carry back into the other six days.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer -moreau fye week one). this one rest day, called the sabbath, was key for her and it took her a while to realize the importance of it, but once she did, the quality of her life became better and life and all the difficulties of it came more manageable once she took a day to reflect and relax. she encourages everyone to do the same to live a well-lived life. we must remember that we are human--not machines. modebola knew that in order to live a life well-lived, you have to take care of yourself as well as others. giving back is one of the greatest things you can do in life. not only was it fulfilling for her, but for others as well. modebola grew up helping out in her family, giving back to the poor, tutoring children as a side job, and even packaging medical supplies for the needy in african countries. of course, she did this not on her own but with the help of her support system around her as well as inspiration from others. for example, in week 2 of moreau, modebola took the time to view a movie about father hesburgh and father hesburgh’s story really impressed her. she was truly inspired by all the great things he did in his lifetime. a quote from the movie reads “father hesburgh recognized that we all had a duty to serve and give back.” (father hesburgh film 2019 -moreau fye week two). modebola realized this as well. she knew that one cannot live a good life without charity and giving back. all that you achieve in life amounts to nothing if you do not share with others and give back to your community that helped build you up. in order for modebola to live the life that she lived so well, she could not do it alone. she needed people supporting her that surrounded her. the friends she met when coming to college were great and they supported each other through the hard times of college. in week 3 of her moreau lessons, she learned that it was important to always ask yourself your purpose, and you can even ask your peers to help you further understand why you were placed on this earth. this quote from one of the readings states, “to help us discern what our talents and gifts are, we need a circle of friends (parents, teachers, coaches, etc.).”(three key questions adapted from fr. michael himes -moreau fye week three). that is exactly what she had and it helped her to be the best person she could have been. no one can do life alone. yes, it was quite difficult for her to make friends when she first moved to south bend, indiana knowing she was alone in this big, new world. however, once she met those solid friends, she did not look back. her friends, peers, and mentors definitely helped her and encouraged her to become the great woman she was. modebola was a neuroscience and behavior major at the university of notre dame. it was a struggle, but she conquered, thanks to the great amount of support and resources the school provided her with. she first came into college not really knowing what to do, but the more she reached out to upperclassmen in the same field, mentors, and advisors, her career choice became solidified. week 4 of moreau played an important role whenever she had doubts about going into the medical field. one thing she acquired from that week’s lesson was that “studying what you enjoy goes hand-in-hand with getting involved.” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development -moreau fye week 4). she knew she loved science, but when things got difficult she did not give up. that is when she toughened up, reached out to tutors, and was able to be the best student that she could be. she knew that she could not join every club and do every activity on campus, but choosing a few things she really loved doing and sticking to them was sufficient enough for her to continue living a well-lived life. one word: networking. modebola networked all her life, and everything she learned from the people she connected with helped her live an even better life. before week’s 5 lesson in moreau (irish compass activity -moreau fye week five), she really did not know much about networking. after all, she had just gotten to college and really was not familiar with all her surroundings. but once she attempted to network with people in her field, she did not look back. it was such a relief for her to know that people were so driven to help her succeed, and she was overwhelmed by the support and love. this definitely contributed to her well lived-life. she always reiterated how important networking was. one of her favorite phrases sums it all up: iron sharpens iron. one thing modebola will never forget is the video she watched from moreau week 6 and how inspirational it was. there are so many obstacles when coming to a place you have never been to before--no friends, no family. but she persevered. whenever she felt down, sometimes she would revisit the video she watched in moreau. jihoon kim, the man who had an accident and lost the ability to walk and do lots of things he normally could have done by himself. he was a very inspirational man, who said, “we spend too much time worrying about the things we don’t have.” (5 minutes by the grotto -moreau fye week 6). whenever we face an obstacle in life, we have to remember that we cannot let it get in the way of our success and our life that we aspire to live well. modebola wanted us to remember that we must always be grateful for whatever we have, no matter the circumstances. resilience is key to a well-lived life. one of the last virtues modebola believed was key to living a life well-lived was strong relationships. to have strong relationships, you do not need 50 friends that you know you cannot rely on. five quality friendships was all that she needed to be happy, and she was content indeed. but beyond friendships, overall solidarity within a community is key to living a good life. without a community that people can call their home, one can find themselves alone despite being amongst many people. the ted talk pope francis gave was key for modebola remembering this. he said, “we have so much to do, and we must do it together.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by ted talk -moreau fye week 7). again, living a well lived-life includes not only yourself, but helping others to achieve greatness and be the best version of themselves. capstone integration , choosing to live "truly i tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me" (matthew 25:40). the parable of sheeps and goats in matthew 25 is one of many of jesus’ lessons that demonstrate what a life well-lived entails. to live for others, to silence one’s pride and take the burden of another, this is to live as and for jesus. in my initial mission statement i remarked that to better the world, i must first better myself. i think i should revise that now and say that bettering the world is equally important for bettering ourselves. it is a delicate equilibrium. therefore, as i look forward to these next few years at notre dame, and the many years after, i hope to find the balance between the two. to develop the gratitude, patience, and empathy necessary to go out into the world, but also the same traits to step back from the world and appreciate it (moreau fye week 13). erik erikson was a prominent psychologist who is most recognized for his stages of psychosocial development. as an individual ages, they experience different crises, for instance as an infant, they have to deal with trust versus mistrust, or during a midlife crisis you have to deal with generativity vs stagnation. at age 19, between erikson’s range of 13-21, he proposed that i am experiencing identity vs confusion, which i would say is incredibly fitting for where i am right now. during my teenage years i have felt overwhelmed by the number of possibilities and responsibilities in my life. looking back, i thought that the ib tests i took and the extracurriculars i participated in were crucial to me getting into the college i dreamed of and the successful life i imagined; everything i did depended on them. and now, i find myself living the exact same way, as if i learned nothing from the amount of unnecessary stress and countless opportunities i skipped. creating an identity centered around which “x” i am a part of or accepted to is a very fragile one, because every imperfect test result or every missed club meeting is ego shattering. focusing so much on the future strips me of the present. you would think that because we have an infinite amound of “presents” we would find ourself in it more often (integration three fye moreau week eight). a solution to this was introduced in week one: self-reflection. it’s the idea of being able to detach ourselves from all of the crippling expectations and doubts about the future and anchoring ourselves in the now ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). it just takes five minutes to shift an entire perspective (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week two). it begs the question, how can i live versus simply being alive? i will foster relationships with everybody that i can. i believe it is a sad reality that humans have stratified ourselves into “us” and “them”. “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis fye moreau week seven). i think part of the human experience is realizing that you share it with billions of others. everybody is going through something, and while it easy to get caught up in our own affairs, one of the most therapeutic exercises is taking on the burdens of others. at the beginning i talked about how i wanted to develop gratitude before i go off into the world, but i believe gratitude is often found when you immerse yourself in the chaos around you. in south bend you can drive just five minutes off campus and enter an entirely different reality; grades have been my biggest stress here, but it is a very local reality that individuals are wondering where their next meal will come from. waking up in a bed, having internet, drinking clean water—these are privileges that we take for granted every day. this is why in both my career and in my life in general, i hope to always provide a preferential option for the poor. provide is one of the essential words to the https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143420 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143548 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143581 mission statement because it is an action word. it requires giving, even sacrificing, not just being passionate about it (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media fye moreau week 12). one of the greatest tensions experienced is the amount of wealth we have yet the amount of poverty that still exists. we have an opportunity to make a change because we are alive and witnesses (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). while i am not expecting individuals to donate their fortunes to countries like haiti or rwanda, i do hope that we can grow more empathetic to the suffering present in the humans around us, not just the labels we give to make them seem more distant (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). in a more general sense, i hope to provide a preferential option to the oppressed—to those who encounter inherent and structural socioeconomic barriers that i can hardly fathom (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). i will be patient with where i end up after college. for the longest time i wanted to be an oncologist, and this year i have considered teaching or being an international public health worker, but now i can confidently say, i have no clue where i will end up. that would have scared me for most of my life, but i have started to become more patient with where i end up and more concerned with how i get there. understanding my foundation—what makes me happy, what am i good at, and who can i help—is critical to not only occupying a fulfilling job, but living a fulfilling life ("three key questions" fr. michael himes fye moreau week three). i had the privilege of meeting a physician’s assistant in my hometown through irishcompass, and i found the conversation became more centered around the traits she brought and acquired to and from the job, versus the job itself ("week five irishcompass activity" fye moreau week https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143671 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143686 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143686 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143622 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143622 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143650 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143650 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143473 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit?usp=sharing five). it does not matter what job you have or what salary you make, if you cannot see what you offer to the job, or what your job offers to you and those around you, you will be miserable ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development fye moreau week four). to end on a quote from father hesburgh, “all of us are experts are practicing virtue at a distance” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley fye moreau week two). gratitude, patience, and empathy are all things i can easily write and preach about, but living them is an entirely different thing. the biggest obstacle to living a life well-lived is choosing not to live—to let life fly right by you and let your body just carry you through the motions. however, choosing to live sparks a joy that you will want to share with the whole world, and that is how you make the world a better place. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 li 1 peggy hnatusko moreau fye 1 march 2022 to a loving friend, family member, and passionate individual as benjamin franklin famously put it, nothing in this world is certain except death and taxes. although there are countless ways people avoid paying their taxes every year, no one’s figured out how to avoid death. so, even though i’m eighteen years old and hopefully won’t be dying in the foreseeable future, it doesn’t mean that death is something that doesn’t concern me. when i do inevitably die in the future, i’d like to be remembered as someone who tried his best to be a loving friend and family member, and someone who worked his hardest in his career and to improve the surrounding community. (hence the title.) essentially, i want to experience a life well-lived, which i broadly define as a life without any regrets. however, i do think that there are some obvious signs of a life well-lived, which include living every moment to its fullest and serving the surrounding people and community. in between right now and when i die in the future, what do i want to accomplish? although it’s a very rough plan, i’d like to graduate from notre dame in three years, find a job working on cutting-edge technology with airplanes/jets, get married, and maybe have a few kids. i’d also like to live near my parents so that i can visit them often and help them out if they ever needed/wanted it. when i die, i want to have lived a life that was full of lots of different passions and various interests. i don’t want people to reflect on my life and be able to summarize it in one word. for example, although i want to be an engineer, i don’t want to “just” be an engineer. i was always interested in engineering and designing things but coming to notre dame has also li 2 made me interested in potentially learning some music theory, philosophy, and mandarin outside of class. in the future, i’d like to use my engineering skills to create a new and innovative aircraft, but i also want to serve the community through advocating for diversity and inclusion. a lot of my inspiration for wanting to be remembered this way comes from watching the film about father hesburgh’s life, where the film says, “he did a lot of things that people thought of as not particularly ‘priest-y’; he was entrepreneurial” (hesburgh directed by patrick creadon – moreau fye week two). this quote shows that father hesburgh broke a lot of societal norms that others placed on him, and i want to be remembered in a similar way. i might not achieve a fraction of the things that he accomplished, but i strive to eventually be able to provide the same kind of impact he had on others. this also ties in with one the conversation activity in week five, where the conversation made me think, “one thing that stretched my awareness of myself was how much i could influence the people around me without even realizing it” (week five discernment conversation activity – moreau fye week five). this conversation really made me realize that i want to be remembered as someone who had a positive impact on others. whether it be through leadership, volunteering, tutoring, parenting, etc., i think that there are many ways to positively impact others and i want to be remembered as someone who did so. as i mentioned previously, i’m really just striving for a life well-lived, but there are many different ways to interpret what this truly means. for me, it means a life without any regrets. one way to live life without regrets is to not get caught up in the small, everyday business of life. i think it’s really important to occasionally take breaks and just reflect on life as a bigger picture and a slow, gradual process. this viewpoint that i have is largely inspired by a quote from week one, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to li 3 see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). even at notre dame with midterms and clubs and other activities, i’ve found ways to slow down and take breathers before bed or in the morning so that i can reflect on my life and decide what i want to do with it. by slowing down life and taking a look at the bigger picture, it’s really allowed me to realize how much of an impact everything has on my life. from friends and family members to clubs and classes, everything has really changed my life a lot. i think living a life well-lived and not having regrets means being able to take in each experience and truly learning from it. that’s why i loved the quote i chose from week four, which was, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey – moreau first year experience course” by muerelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). at notre dame, i’ve been trying to live a life well-lived by taking in each moment and trying to focus on the present and not be overwhelmed at what the future holds. hopefully, i can be remembered as someone who made the most of every moment when i eventually die in the future. finally, i think the last important part of living a life without regrets (life well-lived) is forming strong and healthy relationships with those around me. from friends to family members, every one of the people that i’m close to right now are irreplaceable. they’ve brought so much joy to my life and helped me so much that i really think it’s impossible to live a life well-lived without these kind of relationships. that’s why i think the quote from tattoos on the heart is amazing where it says, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together, they had a potful of plenty” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week seven). i think that it shows that individually, we all face our own struggles. we all face problems and life isn’t always li 4 perfect, but with the support of others, we can rely on one another to create something amazing. that’s part of the reason that i’ve been trying to get involved with lots of different clubs at notre dame, from the rocket team to the table tennis team, i think that the friendships i’ve made so far at notre dame are critical to living a life well-lived. however, how can one tell if a life is well-lived or not? personally, i think good signs of a life well-lived include making the most out of every moment and unconditionally helping others. in week three, there was an article that advocated for focusing on the realization that death is inevitable. “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). i’d argue that a life welllived is one that makes the most of every moment, where there are no regrets because there is no wasting time or wasting the present. again, i hope to be remembered as someone who had a life well-lived and didn’t waste their time. another sign of a life well-lived comes from the video in week six, where the speaker encourages us to “just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). i think this ties back into my definition of living a life without regrets because this mindset is very optimistic and looks toward the present and the future instead of the past. it shows that a life well-lived involves helping others and serving the community. essentially, i’d like for my eulogy to reflect that i lived a life well-lived. this includes not having any regrets, having strong relationships, serving those around me, making the most of every moment, and having a positive impact on everyone that i come across. i think that my time here at notre dame so far is helping me achieve some of these goals, but i realize that these li 5 things aren’t always easy to do. hopefully though, i have a long time to slowly work towards these goals and make it a reality in the future. untitled document living your best life by putting others first it is hard to believe that i am almost done with my first year of college at notre dame. on the one hand, it seems like my time here just flew by, but on the flip side, some days feel like i've been here for years. i guess it just depended on whether i was having a rough week missing my family, or having a great time with my new friends. at any rate, regardless of how my days were going, i feel so appreciative that i was able to experience this wonderful opportunity. when i think about my life right now, it seems so hectic, especially with finals fast approaching. i feel like my mind is always racing with what i have to do for the day, like doing my homework and studying for tests. having a conversation with some of my friends at dinner last week really made me think. my friends were discussing the upcoming week and how busy they were going to be. one of them said that they couldn't wait till they were done with college because of how much time is spent preparing for assignments and exams. this made me sad. i didn't say anything at the time because it seemed like everyone else was in agreement with that statement but later on that evening, i began to think to myself. are we just going through the motions during our college life? are we not taking the time to stop and smell the roses, so to speak(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one)? i am fully aware of how blessed i am to be able to be part of the notre dame community. i want to be able to savor every single day, even the days that are particularly rough. i know that living the college life can be rough and sometimes things are going to be hectic but taking time to slow down and enjoy all that i have accomplished so far has been great for my mental health. taking a stroll around the campus to clear my mind and take in the beautiful scenery has done wonders for my well-being. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). being surrounded by new friends here at notre dame has inspired me to push myself harder. sometimes i lose focus when i feel like i have too much on my plate but it's been great https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 having friends who are taking the same classes and can relate to the struggle of sometimes feeling overwhelmed. as i take time to reflect on how i want to go forward pursuing a life well-lived, i recall a homily that my priest back home gave several years ago. he said that no one could ever lay on their deathbed and claim to have lived a good life if they did not do this one thing. this statement really got the congregation's attention and we all leaned in a little bit closer to hear what he was going to say next. he went on to say "it is impossible to live a life well-lived without this one thing..kindness." that's it. kindness. wow, i thought about that homily for the rest of the day. of course, there are so many aspects to life and everyone will have their own idea on what makes a life well lived, but being kind is something that everyone should strive to be. there are so many little things that we can do in our lives that can brighten up someone's day. a smile, or a compliment can really change a person's day around. always showing kindness and doing small gestures in the name of kindness is powerful. just like mother teresa said "in this life we cannot do great things. we can only do small things with great love." i would like to live my life in such a way that when people think of me, they smile because i have been a positive force in their lives. i think for many people, if asked what is considered a life well lived, many would probably say having a successful job, making a lot of money or traveling around the world. yes, all of these things are nice things to try to achieve in one's life but they most certainly are not a good way to measure a successful life. rather, i believe striving to be more kind, more understanding, and more tolerant of those around us are far more beneficial to living a good life(“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). it's so important to set a good example for others to see. one of my favorite quotes that i try to live by is "preach the https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ gospel at all times. use words if necessary." actions always speak louder than words. i would hope that my friends and family would consider me a person that they could trust and rely on. my mission in life is to live in a way that would make my parents proud of me and to follow the catholic faith to the best of my ability. my parents have always taught me to do the right thing, even when no one else was doing it. i would hope that during my remaining time at notre dame, i will continue to move towards my goals while being guided by my professors, the staff, and also the friends that i have made. i know they will help me during the good and bad days that everyone faces. i know that i will come across challenges that will test me mentally and spiritually but having a strong faith can give you the courage to get through even the toughest times in your life. i anticipate that there will be times when i will feel overwhelmed. i also know that it is completely normal to feel this way from time to time. now with my freshman year almost coming to a close, i can't help but feel proud of myself for stepping up to the challenges that i encountered. after the excitement of starting college wore off, i was stuck with the reality that i would be away from my family and friends for quite a while. for the first time ever, i actually felt like an adult, and it was scary. and if i am going to be honest, it was kind of depressing at times too. being homesick can really put a damper on your mood and make you wonder if you made the right choice. however, suffering, even when it is small, can always be beneficial if you learn something from it (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i used the days that i was especially sad to reflect on how lucky i was to have such a strong relationship with my parents and friends back home. being sad and missing them only meant that we have a close bond that i cherish. sometimes suffering is needed to allow us to appreciate what we might ordinarily take for granted. suffering also brings us closer to god in the sense that we tend to be drawn closer to him in our dark days. there cannot be light without darkness and joy without sadness. i looked forward to my remaining three years at notre dame. i'm excited, nervous and happy all https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing at the same time. i know that as long as i continue to work hard, stay focused, and of course be kind, i will be just fine. capstone integration capstone 4/29/2022 the journey of a lifetime well-lived looking back at the beginning of my second semester in college, i was wondering what types of experiences would come my way since i had more knowledge than i did in the first semester. it felt like i had more influence on what i was doing since the first semester was more arbitrary and predetermined. one of the memorable outcomes was creating my mission statement in my moreau class. i believe that experiencing failure and community is vital for living a great life. loving yourself and others leads to happiness as your wisdom grows from failure. everyone wants to win and succeed while avoiding failure. however, failure is essential to grow and improve as a person. failure allows us to see what we need to improve on as humans. i’ve learned a lot this past semester in my moreau class about living a good life and choosing the right career for myself, a lot of the weekly moreau helped me think about what i wanted to do and how i should approach life. “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology. put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the quote helps me understand that life is becoming more complicated every day since knowing how to interpret and sort through information is more valuable than finding it. however, despite having access to an abundant amount of information, it can become overwhelming similar to how life can be overwhelming and it’s better to take breaks in order to collect yourself and look at the big picture. “ hesburgh removed deans, he removed faculty members, he made a change, and he didn’t accept less than excellence.” (“hesburgh” jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). i admire hesburgh for wanting the best for his school and legacy, he wanted to leave behind something that benefitted people. the movie helped me learn about leaving behind a legacy of wanting the best for others. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness…….but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). as my first impression, i was skeptical about what the nun was saying but now i understand. it’s better to live a well-lived life because my time here is limited. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process. contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life. “ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html (undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). the quote made me less stressed about the career choice process since it helped me understand that even if i don’t make the right career choice, i can always change majors, it’s not set in stone. however, it doesn’t mean that i should take my career lightly, it does require plenty of exploration and research. the week 5 reflection helped me learn more about my major by talking to an upperclassman which help put things into perspective for me. he also gave me confidence in my interest in the major since he said that i appeared to be passionate and dedicated which made me feel happy and more comfortable being a civil engineer. “so as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope.” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau week six). the man in the interview gives great advice about being thankful for life despite unfortunate circumstances. having a great approach towards life can improve life. for the rest of my life, i plan to approach it in a more positive and hopeful manner. rather than complaining about life and thinking about how bad i have it, i rather keep a positive attitude and find a solution to it. “ how wonderful would it be if the growth of scientific and technological innovation would come along with more equality and social inclusion.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i enjoyed pope francis’s form of thinking because he wants humanity to evolve but in an equal and inclusive way. since my mission involves community, it includes having everyone involved in humanity’s technological evolution. the week 8 assignment made me thoroughly think about my life and what i wanted to do. it was difficult writing a eulogy about myself but also helpful since i was referring to things i plan to do as if i had already done them. it made me feel more confident about the goals in the future and what i plan to accomplish. going through the previous 7 weeks of moreau also reinforced the idea of living a well-lived life. “accompaniment reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that “over there” and “here” are intertwined.” ( “teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg, january ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i interpreted the idea of accompaniment as sharing life and uniting through solidarity with one another. intertwining the idea of “over there” and “over here” is breaking two sides together to share life. i heavily supported the ideas in this article because it made me think about the importance of bringing different groups of people together to form a communal bond. “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents, and backgrounds to the community.” ( “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame moreau fye week ten). i learned that diversity in a community is also heartwarming and important since race shouldn’t be a factor in whether or not you are in a https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ communal group. people should be allowed to be close to each other regardless of their race. thankfully the spirit of inclusion at notre dame is strong and i’m proud of it. despite things that i learned to enjoy and include in my life, i did learn a few things to avoid such as an echo chamber. in week 11 of moreau, i learned about the dangers of an echo chamber and how important it is to avoid them. the idea of having a strong belief in a subject while discrediting the beliefs of others is quite dangerous. it can prevent people from forming bonds with others and forming communities since they fail to keep an open mind. personally, i’ll avoid putting myself in an echo chamber by understanding that my opinion is not more valuable than someone else’s and i should keep an open mind. “yes, i am alive, and george floyd is dead. i can breathe; he cannot. but just because a police officer did not murder me or my children does not mean that he did not harm us.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). the reading helped me learn about the different attacks that people can be affected by including physical and mental. it’s difficult to fight against verbal and mental attacks since it’s not always so obvious but i still respect dean cole for fighting against injustice with his law degree. it inspires me since it means that people use their own skills to fight against terrible injustices such as racism. concluding my first year at notre dame is sad but also hopeful since i learned in my first and especially my second semester of moreau different life goals, ideas, and career choices that have made my time here better. these classes helped me realize that i value community and failure in my life. i’m grateful to notre dame for allowing me to take these classes and meet new people as i became integrated here. i’m grateful to have taken a wonderful second-semester moreau class. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ capstone integration a continuous journey i think the model of reflective leadership is a great model to live by because it can be applied to all aspects of life. the obvious implication is in holding an actual “leadership position”, where the title tells you that you have to be a leader. in this situation, the leadership is explicitly demanded but the reflection is not. however, the quality of reflective leadership is even more important when there is no explicit demand for leadership. in relationships with friends and family, being a reflective leader demands the ability to govern your own thoughts and actions as well as setting an example for others. i have the potential to be a reflective leader in many different aspects of my life, beginning with my education at notre dame. as i have come to understand the purpose of this education, i have realized that there are many aspects of it beyond the factual information i will learn in the classroom. in fact, particularly with the field of computer science, there have been heated debates on whether a college degree is even worth it. there are so many coding bootcamps that promise a great job for a fraction of the monetary cost of a traditional college education, and personally, i have questioned at times whether i am wasting my time and money being at such a university. in addition to the questions of the merits of a degree for my career, i have also questioned why i ended up at such a prestigious university in the first place. drawing from our discussion of deresiewicz’s “the students”, i have wondered if it was just by virtue of “being on the treadmill” that attending this school was just another hoop to jump through for the sake of jumping through hoops. still, my complete understanding of the value of a notre dame education answers all these questions. first of all, the coding bootcamps usually do not provide anywhere near the value they advertise. but more than that, the reason i choose to stay at this place is for the education i receive outside of the classroom. the meaning i find at this place is the education of how to be a person and how to have loving relationships. i believe that this place is what i need to get off the treadmill, so to speak. by looking at my life in a holistic manner, i hope to understand my deepest desires and how to accomplish those. deresiewicz’s example of students from elite universities (and honestly some from here) competing for top consulting jobs strictly because they are hard to land illustrates what it looks like to lack an understanding of your true desires. they do not know what they really want, so they go for “the next thing” in the line of challenges. i intend for my life to be different from theirs. not necessarily in the sense that i do not want a challenging career, but in that i would want that because i find joy in it. in thinking about what it means to have joy in something, i recall fr. himes’ “three key questions”. in essence, he proposed that for something to be a great career for someone, they should like doing it, they should be good at it, and it should be a genuine service to the community at large. these questions are something i intend to grapple with throughout my entire career, specifically focusing on the last one. i do not think that the first two will be an issue for me, as i especially enjoy working with computers and i seem to be pretty good with it, but i think the last one will be hardest to nail. in recent years, we have seen all sorts of uses of technology that work against the consumer’s best interest and against the common good. one example of this is weaponizing technology to enforce near impossible quotas on warehouse workers and delivery drivers. i believe that i will have to make difficult decisions in my career path in dealing with these companies, especially if they are offering a large sum of money or asking me to build something i morally disagree with. still, if i believed that it was impossible to achieve this balance, i would not have chosen this career path. the next place i believe is vital for me to be a reflective leader is in my involvement with clubs and residential life. with my involvement in clubs, specifically the linux users group as i will take on the role of vice president, i feel it is my responsibility to pass on the experience and knowledge i have gained relating to my career to the other members of the club, yet more importantly to create a welcoming environment that encourages learning and curiosity. in this sense, i hope to become a good accompanier as reifenberg described in his article. this is where the reflective part of reflective leadership comes in. obviously we want to share our passions and curiosity with anyone interested, but we must also meet them where they are and provide support when they need it. in this capacity, reflective leadership is using a position not to create distance, but rather to use the expertise gained to provide support and reduce any perceived support. similarly, next year in fisher hall i will have the responsibility of providing a welcoming home to the fresh fish that will be living with us. being a reflective leader here requires a careful balance of teaching them the traditions, culture, and expectations of living in fisher with personal empathy and individualized attention as they make the biggest transition yet in their lives. additionally, i must meet the expectation of providing solitude in friendship through meaningful conversation. in this way i hope to create strong and personal connections with the freshmen as they become adjusted to life here. as i think about my life beyond this freshman year, which has flown by so quickly, and think about my view from this mountain pass as dillard’s “stalking” suggests, i am inspired by the potential that has been shown to me. i have only just begun my journey and soon i will be challenged to live out my values in a difficult situation when the stakes are high. before i know it, i may have true authority and have the choice to preserve the status quo, or to, as pope francis calls us to, identify our cause-concerns and act on them to create meaningful social change in the world. integration 1 finding meaning in a life well lived during the past semester and a half, we have all reflected on what it means to live a life well lived as we have moved into completely new surroundings. coming to notre dame, which is completely different from my hometown, i had the unique opportunity to discover myself. i had the time and the resources to self reflect and find out what was important to me, what did a life well lived look like for me. although i may not have found the answer yet, i think reflection has been valuable during this journey of discovery. during each of the past seven weeks, i have taken time to reflect and learn something new about my values, core beliefs, and most simply what matters to me. during week one, of this semester i was drawn to the quote, “one of the greatest surprises i have encountered has been that the people who seem wisest about the necessity of placing limits on the newest technologies are, often, precisely the ones who helped develop those technologies…”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, moreau week 1). going into college one of my goals was to reduce the amount of time that i spent on my phone and other devices in order to redirect that time towards making better connections with those around me. i felt like i had developed an unhealthy dependence on my phone and believed that it would limit my ability to make new connections. however, after only a little while at college, i quickly reverted back to my old habits. i often used my phone to get myself out of “awkward” situations rather than talking to someone i did not know as well. the reason that this quote stood out to me was that people, who are much smarter than i am, were recognizing the same negative impacts. as a result, i challenged myself to take small steps away from my phone. the smallest step but arguably the most important was not going on my phone while in the elevator. i started to recognize that every time i was in the elevator with someone else, i automatically turned to my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/modules/items/149141 phone instead of talking to them. as a result, i forced myself to not go on my phone in the elevator and found that these small conversations allowed me to get to know a lot of people i would not have normally talked to. these small conversations led to bigger ones in the dining hall that allowed me to grow closer to people. ultimately, i learned that i enjoyed meeting new people and that the time i spent off my phone and made an effort to reach out to other people made a difference. taking breaks from my devices suddenly became part of what i defined as a life well lived. the second week of this semester i focused on discovering my larger goals in life. while reading the story of tia paulette, i was inspired by her drive to constantly give back to her community despite already accomplishing her dream. as i reflected on her story, i realized that although her career was her dream, what she was able to accomplish in her free time truly defined who she was. in her story they reported that, “in her personal time, she continues to give back to her community through volunteerism and mentoring high school and college students seeking to attend law school” ( domer dozen by tia paullette, moreau week 2). rather than taking that time for herself, she decided to use that time for others. her story reminded me of something that my freshman year soccer coach would say, “character is what you do when no one is watching”. paulette was able to find something bigger than herself, service for others, and oriented her life towards that goal. i learned that week that i needed to discover what i wanted my life goal to be rather than simply my career, how did i want to act when no one was watching. while reading about sister teresa during week three, i found particular interest in her interest in death. she said “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html by ruth graham, moreau week 3). although this seemed dark at first, i realized that this quote was more about living a worthwhile life rather than death. by eliminating the “bright and shiny” from our lives we can focus more on the things that we are called to do. if we recognize that we have limited time, it encourages us to spend it doing things that have meaning. during week 4 the quote that resonated with me was “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”(navigating your career journey moreau week 4). one of the things that is important to me and has become very central to my philosophy of life is simply pushing myself out of my comfort zone and trying things. coming into college i recognized that may only have four more years where i could do “stupid” things; college was the one of the last times that i could spend money on stupid things and not have worry about paying bills. one of the ways that i’ve tried to do is find the people that are living the life that i admire, the people who are willing to try anything. although i recognize that i may not be exactly like them, i try to think like them in certain situations in order to encourage myself out of my comfort zone. whether that's waking up at two in the morning to get blaze pizza or talking to a girl at a party, i try to push my boundaries a little bit so that one day things that i am uncomfortable with become normal. week five was probably the most impactful week as i reflected on my values and what was important to me. during the interview with my mom we discussed the question “what is something that is hard for me to hear but something that i need to know” (discerning a life well lived moreau week 5) . her response surprised me as she told me that she thought i “responded too harshly to peoples’ mistakes”. although this was very hard for me to hear, i realized that it was something that i needed to work on. this realization eventually led to something bigger; i realized that i needed to constantly reflect on the things that i did not do well and constantly https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit work to be better. in the example of forgiveness, it is something that i have never been good at but something that i want to be known for. during week six i reflected on what it meant to reach my potential with the opportunities that i have in my life. one of the important things that i discovered during this week was the importance of “what questions”. in particular the quotation that stood out to me was self reflection as it taught that “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich, moreau week 6). for me learning how to properly self reflect helped understand what it meant to reach my potential and take advantage of the opportunities in front of me. i recognized that one of the important things for me to live a “good life” is to fully recognize and fulfill my potential not only at notre dame but in the larger community. finally during week seven i learned an important lesson myself and how i relate to others. in his speech pope francis talked about how “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis, moreau week 7). i recognized myself in this quotation as i have always leaned on others for my happiness; i am most happy when i am around those who care about me and who i care about. as a result, i realized that the “good life” was not only something that i had to pursue alone but something that had to be shared with others. in order to find my “good life” i have to depend on others as well as being there for them to support their goals and root values. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript ’s eulogy eulogy a life well spent is what joshua wanted in life. not only was he able to achieve that but he was also able to achieve a multitude of incredible things through his meaningful life. with traveling the world, assisting those in need, following his passions and dreams, and making not only impactful relationships with all who met him but also with his life-long partner. knowing joshua since he was a little kid i understood how hard he tried to become a better person and to live life to his fullest. around the time of college he really benefited from self reflection. i think he understood this when watching a ted-talk in which they said “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas is” (why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). by seeing the whole picture joshua was able to understand people from different backgrounds and from all walks of life. this is why i find that he was loved by so many people. if it weren't for his openness to love and his commitment to first better himself and then his community then he would not have been able to be the person he was. joshua couldn’t have gotten anywhere near this self-reflection by himself however. he had such amazon support around him everywhere he went. i know he would want to thank his parents for giving him such high moral standards and instilling the beyond amazon ethics that he lived on a day to day basis. i think joshua would more attribute his inspiration of a well lived life to his main mentor todd mann, joshua’s club coach. he connected with joshua on a level that no one had connected with him before. by doing this he left his sense of humor, wittiness, and powerful life quotes in joshua’s life. the lasting impact of a mentor in joshua’s life reminds me of the deep impact that father hesburgh made on african american liberties during the 20th century (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week 2). the impact that they both made on each person is undeniable and will be felt through years and hopefully years to come. joshua’s life was indeed benefited for the better with the aid of an inspiration. along with coach todd in his life joshua went out of his way to get to know adults and people he could learn from. he would constantly sit with the adults or have great discussions with random strangers to try and gain a slice of wisdom or even a piece of what not to do. he did this by asking a former graduate of mendoza at notre dame to tell him about his experience after graduating. after that conversation joshua's education was transformed and little did he know but after mike hug would offer him a job in the future (moreau fye week 5). mike had many connections, not just through his professional positions and the individuals he had met as a result of them, but also through his network of fellow notre dame alums. joshua believed that speaking with him about the processes of obtaining a job after graduation and utilizing the notre dame network, which joshua had heard so much about, would be really valuable to him. joshua also really pursued his dreams. this included traveling the world and making each place he went to a better place. every year his family decided to go on one or two international trips not only to experience beautiful places but also beautiful cultures. one of joshua’s favorite quotes about exploring his best life was: “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” i like this because unless you dip your toe in many pools you don't know which one is for you” (navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). finding the right place by discovering all these types of lives was one of joshua’s favorite things to do. doing this made him live his absolute best life possible. he was able to find such a unique niche within himself by questioning himself and his morals. what was he going to contribute to the world? what was his place in the world? these are questions that he asked himself to hopefully become the best person he can be and in retrospect joshua did all those things with his long and meaningful life on this earth. joshua asked these questions because of some meaningful stuff he read by ruth graham in which it was heavily discussed challenging your own self to better your life (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) when she says this stuff it heavily impacted joshua because he changed his lifestyle asking himself “if i was to die in an hour would i regret my life” this is how he made his life as meaningful as possible. tasha eurich's book "the right way to be introspective (yes, there is a wrong way)" offered a lot to think about in his meditations. when he was attending the university of notre dame he attempted one of the mcdonald center for student well-"ways being's to practice mindfulness," while thinking about eurich's approach of focusing on the what questions rather than the why questions (“the right way to be introspective(yes, there is a wrong way)) by tasha eurich moreau week 6). it was extremely beneficial since it allowed him to focus on what he wanted to achieve and what he already had rather than the more frustrating ideas that might occur when asking why questions. being able to manage the obstacles of life was one of joshua’s special talents that he could just float around problems he was dealing with. ultimately joshua i believe was best known for his beautiful relationships especially to his wife. while joshua struggled with relationships at first he has learned so much about the caring aspect and how to treat other people. i think experiencing different types of relationships and talking with his bestfriends about the problems they are going through and what to do about them was really beneficial for him and his long term growth as a person. joshua was at first very distant with most people but this quote really changed him for the better “the gulf too wide and the gap too distant, the walls grow higher, and we forget who we are meant to be to each other” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction, tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau week 7) joshua grew to become the person we all knew and loved. he really was able to learn what a well lived life is. integration 3 moreau fys integration 3 3/4/22 die doing what you love writing your own eulogy is a difficult assignment because you’re supposed to summarize your life into a few paragraphs. this is hard for me personally because i feel like i haven’t even started living my life yet. i still have so many goals, plans, and bucket-list items to check off that the 19 years i’ve lived so far feel insignificant. i can write an idealized version of how i hope my life will have been lived, and at the end of the day i hope it will have been a “well-lived” one. i think one of the most important things mary learned throughout her life is to not take anything too seriously. it’s so easy to get wrapped up in the stress of daily life, always worried about the next exam, assignment, or “big thing” that’s coming up. the problem is that it makes you constantly look towards the future and prevents you from appreciating the beauty and joy in your everyday life. most of the time this ends up hurting more than helping because it makes you feel like you have to “escape” and just hold on until the next thing that will make you happy. whether that’s a friday night you can spend with your friends or a week of spring break. pico iyer, author of “why we need to slow down our lives”, agrees with this philosophy. it’s important to carve out time to relax because giving our minds time to wander sparks imagination and creativity that positively influences the work we produce (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). mary worked hard, but she also took the time to slow down and take a step back from the craziness to have fun and form meaningful connections with others. this leads to another fundamental idea she lived her life by: relationships are critical to a life well-lived. the world we live in is so divided by race, gender, political affiliation, religion and so much more. the only way we can overcome these barriers to unity is by embracing the teachings of gregory boyle from his book “tattoos on the heart”. boyle believed that by interacting with people who live different lives than us we widen our spheres and this pushes us to become better and more understanding versions of ourselves (“tattoos on the heart” by gregory boyle moreau fye week 7). mary didn’t deny the fact that she could be judgemental towards herself and others, but she always worked to diversify her relationships and form as many connections as she could during her life. two relationships she highly valued during her time at notre dame were her very good friends anna and elizabeth (shoutout to the moreau gang). her favorite thing about conversations with these two girls was how they could be honest with each other, and provide feedback to build each other up and become the best versions of themselves. during a discernment conversation activity, elizabeth helped mary identify things she valued or desired in life, as well as issues that were personally important to her https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/files/524003/download?download_frd=1 (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). this helped mary picture the way she wanted her life to look going forward, and helped her shape the path her life would take. mary loved to take inspiration from other lives she perceived to be “well-lived”. it helped to guide her when she was feeling lost or questioning what to do next. one of these figures was the brilliant father theodore hesburgh, former president of her alma mater, the university of notre dame. mary believed we should all strive to imitate the kindness and enthusiasm that father hesburgh carried out his daily life with, especially his involvement in the civil rights movement (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). it was important for mary to identify her passions and what brought her joy because she knew that eventually her time would end. another figure she looked up to was sister theresa altheia noble, the nun who famously spread the saying “memento mori”, remember you will die (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). mary and sister noble shared the idea that we can’t ignore the fact that death is everywhere, but you’ll live your life far more meaningfully by accepting that fact instead of constantly stressing over it. something that really helped mary find purpose in her life though was discerning the path she wanted to take in life. it was something she struggled with a lot throughout high school and college. she loved learning, especially things that challenged her and pushed her to deeply engage with a topic. her passion for knowledge is what got her to notre dame, and the challenges she encountered there were what led her to pursue a degree in applied computational mathematics and statistics (although she could have done without the physics classes she was required to take). oftentimes our lives don’t follow a linear pattern, as much as we can hope and plan the nice, neat order we want to do things in, we have to keep in mind that sometimes things get messy. the meruelo family center for career development encouraged mary to consider that you shouldn’t give up on your dreams or get discouraged if the process to achieving them takes longer than you expected (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). mary strived her whole life to always try to become a better version of herself, and to develop the concept of a life well-lived. this wasn’t always easy, because self-improvement is a hard process to enact. even identifying what it is about yourself that you want to improve seems daunting or impossible. mary just tried her best to possess insight, an intuitive understanding of oneself, to change her mindset on self improvement (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). she realized that constantly identifying your own perceived faults and basing your self-worth off of your ability to change those factors is not self-improvement. putting in the time and effort to “knowing” yourself is what helps you to change your mindset and eventually work towards becoming the best person you can be. mary died doing what she loved. rescuing a rabid possum. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ capstone integration sp22-fys-10102-17 david lassen 04/26/2022 thinking ahead personal mission statement throughout my 19 years of life, i have encountered situations that have shaped and changed the person i am today. i have failed, succeeded, cried, and laughed but i have always learned something despite the situation. behind the success and failure, i have realized that anything is possible if you put your mind to it. after all, we all have the same opportunities, just that some have more obstacles. these obstacles might be gender, ethnicity, race, etc. what truly matters is the type of mindset one has. whenever i find myself in a challenging situation where i want to give up, i ask myself how much i want it. if i truly desire it, then with hard work i will achieve everything i want. there are ups and downs in life and all of these affect the outcome, but if i stay persistent and positive, i will accomplish my desires. i wish to be able to inspire and encourage others to continue following their goals in life. that is the only way stereotypes will be broken, by providing them wrong. being scared to face challenges and being willing to fail is important. that failure will not only give you a lesson but it will prepare you for future challenges you might encounter. challenges that might be hard to overcome but not impossible. having a mission statement can help one accomplish a goal and achieve a life well-lived. these goals and a life well-lived might look different for everyone but as long as one is happy, then one should continue following the path to that happiness. my mission statement above basically motivates me to continue pushing through hardships to accomplish my goals. these goals might change as time goes by, but i know for sure that i want to inspire others to keep following their dreams even if they seem impossible. i can implement this mission statement for the next three years of my life to get me through college and even help me accomplish my career goals after that. as i was in the process of creating my mission statement i had to reflect on what a life well-lived looked like. this was a tricky question, but being able to define joy was of great help during the process. i used fr. michael himes's definition of joy. fr michael himes stated, “joy–the sense of the rightness of how one is living one’s life.”. ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) after reading this passage, i reflected on past experiences that brought me joy. being with my family and spending time with them always makes me feel at peace. when combined, i concluded that i found joy in making my family proud and many times this came with academic success. this helped me reflect on what i want my three years of college to look like. for me, being in this institution is a great accomplishment. i was able to come to this school through financial aid. it was like an opportunity of a lifetime if you take into consideration the fact that none of my parents went to school. i want to make the best out of this opportunity. being successful and accomplishing things that are not common for a person like me to accomplish brings me joy. i know i want to set a path for future family members. with my current life experiences, i was able to create a mission statement that will guide me throughout my college career. this reflection even helped me find assurance in my https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831?module_item_id=146508 current major. according to the navigating your career journey, “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you.". (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development -moreau fye week four) as a first-generation college student, finding a major was hard. the only thing i knew was that i wanted to help underserved communities improve their lives. now more than ever i am sure that i took the right path. with a political science major, i will be able to develop important skills that will help me make a change in society. there is no doubt that i want to help change our political system. with this goal in mind, i will be able to stay on track in college for the next three years. being successful and helping people with unfair circumstances brings me joy and this can only be accomplished if i take full advantage of the academic opportunities i have in this institution. during this moreau class, i was not only able to develop what a well-lived life means to me but i was also able to develop knowledge about how to accomplish it. in my first week at moreau, i was able to interact with articles that questioned how daily things around me affected my life. one of these articles was written by pico lyer where he questions how technology affects our daily lives. lyer states, “twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives.”. ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fye week one technology is a tool that has shaped our everyday lives. it can be beneficial but at times, it can be harmful. i have personally experienced situations in which technology has brought negativity to my life. comparing myself to people this can be academically or physically has resulted in a hatred feeling against myself. similar to lyer’s point, one can often get caught up with technology that they forget about real life. this is something that i will keep in mind as i finish https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ my education at notre dame. if i want to accomplish my goals, just like my mission statement states, using technology appropriately is something i will practice. i am aware that i am human and that i make mistakes, but recognizing these mistakes and making a change will get me closer to my goals in life. recognizing these mistakes might be difficult and that is why we always have to rely on something, for example, a mission statement, to keep us aligned. i am aware that when one faces uncertainty, it might be hard to react. what gave me an idea of how to react to uncertainty was the hesburgh film that i watched during week two of moreau. in the film, it was stated, “it's because of his faith that he never lost hope”. ("hesburgh film" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) during the hesburgh film, it was mentioned that the reason why hesburgh was able to accomplish so many things in life was that he always put his faith first. he stayed true to his values and his country which allowed him to expand his comprehension throughout time. this was something that inspired me in the creation of my mission statement. we all might have different definitions of faith and that is what makes us unique. faith can lead to strength in a person which can help me get through my three years of college. if i never lose the faith that i have in myself, and despite the hardships i face, keep going then i can accomplish anything that proposes to myself. i am aware that there might be challenges and i will encounter failure. to avoid this failure to define me, i will have to rely on my faith to not lose hope or myself. failure is intimidating but something unavoidable. i believe that i did a great job incorporating failure into my mission statement. it will help me be aware that failure is normal and that it doesn’t define you. with this in mind, i can overcome challenges that might present themselves in the upcoming years. what helped me achieve this mindset was looking at the video for week six. in the video, the main character said, “but then i began to realize that some https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others.” (“five minutes” by grottomoreau fye week six) in the video, we see how dr.kim was full of insecurities and anger after his accident. he then explains that his faith allowed him to conquer strength and make the best of the situation. realizing that he should be grateful that he had another opportunity to survive allowed him to continue with a normal life and his goals, even if they changed over time. whenever i encounter these challenges, i need to take a break and reflect on the positives in my life. by being grateful in moments of uncertainty, i will be able to think more clearly and keep pursuing what brings me joy. not only will faith allow me to push through hardships but having recognized my past efforts will fill me with the strength to keep doing. during week 5, we were assigned to contact someone and have a discernment conversation. (discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week five) i decided to call my young little brother and throughout the conversation, i was able to realize how important i am to him. my little brother is probably the most important thing in my life. being in college not only has made us closer but it has made us cherish each other more. throughout the conversation, i realized how important i am to him too. whenever i feel like i have failed, i can just think about him. by taking a moment and thinking about those that you inspire, one can keep pushing forward. this is something that has motivated me in the past weeks. being able to confront hardships along with having a mission statement in hand, i can get through my next years of college. failure is something that will be present throughout my college experience but so will doubt. doubt has been probably one of my biggest challenges so far. i often doubt my worth and my belonging to this institution. knowing how to get through this will not only make my life easier but it will get me one step closer to my life goals. in week 7 we touched on how to do so https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit briefly. the article tattoos on heart states, “close your eyes; see with the other one then we are no longer saddled by the persistent judgments or ceaseless withholding, our constant inclusion”. (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j tattoos on the heart” moreau fye week seven) i was able to connect to this article on a personal level. i often get tangled up in what people think about me and its interference with how i perform certain things. the way the article ended gave me a great lesson. i have become very insecure here but part of this has been because i have let others' actions of exclusion get to me. if i just take a step back, close my eyes and let go of the toxic people around me, i can get one step closer to achieving my goals. people often like to judge and lessen others to make themselves feel better or because they simply don’t understand the circumstances different people face. i was able to acknowledge this in week 10. in the article by dr. roin d’ angelo, it is stated, “most whites live, grow, play, learn, love, work and die primarily in social and geographic racial segregation.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo adapted from huffpost fye week ten) in this reading, we get to understand why it is hard for white people to include others and why they accept racism in their lives. i have encountered doubt because of racially motivated people in my life. in my mission statement, i state that there might be obstacles in my life because of my background. i hope that by including that, it can work as a reminder to not give up. to keep pushing no matter how hard life gets because, at the end of the day, it is up to me to let what others think to define me. i have had the opportunity to build hatred against them because of the doubt that caused but at the end of the day, i realized that hate will bring nothing but darkness in my life. week 12 helped me shape this thought. after reading dean g. testimony i was able to see how life-changing letting go of grudges can be. in his testimony, he states, “each report of racial https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008?module_item_id=168045 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit violence at the hands of a police officer or group of men brings to the surface vivid memories of that terrible night.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” dean g. marcus fye week twelve) in this testimony, dean expressed how the situation he experienced as a kid shaped the person he came to be. it was an experience that he is not able to forget but that he was able to overcome to live a better life. i can apply this when it comes to encountering doubt in myself. as i mentioned before, the doubt i have experienced has been implemented by others. if i would have let this doubt define my life, i wouldn’t have been able to complete my freshman year of college. i learned to just let go. building hatred leads to no good, it leads to more uncertainty. similarly to dean, instead of listening to this doubt or letting the doubt define me, i have used it as motivation. in my mission statement, i mentioned that everyone has the same opportunities, just that some have more obstacles than others. doubt is one of those obstacles. people often try to make you feel less which can interfere with your self-confidence. it is up to the person to decide if they are going to let that doubt define them. by recognizing that this is just one obstacle i will build the strength to overcome it and even find the motivation to keep going. week thirteen of my moreau class has been the most impactful. by creating a mission statement, i have built a guide to my future. i realized what my real motives are in life. i was able to identify what is more important to me. today, i am more than confident about what i want to do in the future. i couldn’t have created that mission statement without week 9. in week 9 week we talked about how one could improve conditions in their community while improving one life. i always knew i wanted to give back to my community and i always thought that the right way to do so was by representing their voice. after reading about an alumni experience i changed my mind. reifenberg mentions the following, “solidarity with the poor means not to https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ try to be the voice of the voiceless. this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.”. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg fye week nine) it came to my attention that if i kept the mindset of representing someone's voice, i would be silencing them. that is why in my mission statement, i mentioned that i wanted to encourage people to follow their goals and set an example for others to use as a guide. by doing so, they will be able to make their own decisions and have control of their life instead of having someone implement to them what to do. i want to help underserved communities in the future but helping them have a platform to speak up, not speaking up for them. in week 11 we talked about ideological bubbles. this is a great example of how during this lesson, i was able to learn to adopt new ideas in my life. in the video assigned it was stated, “seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko” fye week eleven) if i had decided to continue with the goal of representing minority groups i would have stayed in an ideological bubble. by giving people a platform to speak up for themselves, we will all learn the different struggles each person has and therefore brainstorm together on how to make their lives better. if these lessons would have not been presented to me, my personal mission statement would have looked differently. i know that in the future i want to be a leader, a leader that allows each person to have a voice. a voice that can allow them to be heard and get the necessities they lack. creating a personal mission statement has been extremely impactful to me. i was able to identify what really matters to me and what a life well lived means. not only has it helped me identify my goals but i will be able to use it as guidance throughout my college career and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd beyond. by constantly going back to it, i will stay truthful to my values and know-how to react during times of uncertainty. by doing so i will be one step closer to a life well-lived. nickerson fys2 integration 4 dr. david lassen moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 translating my mission into a life well-lived at 364 words, verbose and unwieldy characterize my first attempt to comprehensively articulate who i am, my purpose, and a life well-lived (personal mission statement moreau fye week thirteen). like a cash fortune without a bank, my personal mission statement could not be employed in the daily course of my life. i required a concise statement that could be of practical use in reminding me of what i stand for. what follows is my personal mission statement, distilled to the point where it could become a tacky script tattoo (if the need arose). personal mission statement i strive to sail away from the safe harbor, making a positive impact on the world. to serve and recognize god in the good and in the bad, i use my gifts, opportunities, and privileges to serve, care for, and elevate others. i grow from the relationships i find in a diverse group of others, freely giving and receiving the gifts of love, joy, and friendship. in striving for genuine relationships, i am vulnerable with myself, embracing change and the possibility of failure. reflecting on my first two semesters of college, i am amazed at all that i have experienced. life before college, while not mundane, was relatively prescribed. i maintained the same friendships, went to the same places, and could always take solace in the structure of love and support that my family provided. life in college, while exciting and new, is taxing. balancing new friendships, living on my own, difficult classes, physical exercise, mental health, parties and other social commitments, and my relationship with my girlfriend—all the while trying to maintain close ties to my family and old friends—is sometimes more than i can handle. i have often looked at those around me and only seen great success: published research as a freshman, well-liked by everyone, ahead of their schoolwork, passionate and involved in important issues. in an environment surrounded by incredible people, it’s easy for me to become overwhelmed by feelings of inferiority. i think to myself: i should be doing more. everyone else is. when i feel like this, it is necessary to take a step back. travel novelist pico iyer believed that “[i]t’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as i say in my mission statement, vulnerability and the acceptance of my shortcomings—the recognition of my inherent imperfection—are vital to living my life as my best self, but this type of introspection can only occur when i take a step back. that is the challenge; it is often when i most need perspective that i fail to recognize the necessity of stepping back. however, unchecked introspection poses its own dangers. organizational psychologist dr. tasha eurich found that when trying to understand our feeling, “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this reframing of the self-posed question has transformed and will continue to transform how i practice internal self-awareness and has helped assuage my feelings of inferiority and doubt. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ my journey thus far in college has also shown continuity to my previous experiences. i have always tried to be welcoming and embrace my relationships with a full heart. on a retreat during my junior year of high school, my best friend, tommy, sat outside with me, tears in both of our eyes. he was gay, and i was the first person he had come out to. he asked how this would impact our friendship. he was afraid he wouldn't be loved, just as jacob walsh felt in his essay. a priest assured jacob that god and others love him and said, “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). this is why unconditional love is so important. nothing did change in my relationship with tommy; if anything, our relationship has deepened as a result of this experience. in the first semester of this year, one of the closest friends i had made in my dorm also revealed he was gay. freely giving and receiving the gifts of love, joy, and friendship made my friends feel comfortable enough to be themselves around me and to feel accepted as their true selves. these experiences have affirmed my commitment to love and friendship. looking forward to my next three years at notre dame, i envision many opportunities to live and develop my mission statement. i talk of using my gifts to serve and elevate a diverse group of others in my statement, but i currently do not take much action. i volunteer at the local nicu and help my friends, but outside of that, i am focused on myself and my studies. in fr. ted hesburgh's 1987 laetare medal address, he says, “there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice and at times human stupidity” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). at notre dame, there are tremendous opportunities to become involved in the “battles” and “mountains” fr. hesburgh refers to. next year, i will https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 participate in the annual martin luther king jr. day candlelight prayer service and attend the january social concerns fair. these are small actions, yet they answer dean marcus cole’s call for everyone to use their privilege and position to affect change. in specific regard to racial separation and violence, he urges each of us to “get to know people who differ from us” and “make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“dean g. marcus cole: i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). while activism (both on a policy and personal scale) is crucial to my mission, i must be conscious to not try “to be the voice of the voiceless” because, as fr. gustavo gutiérre says, the goal of accompaniment is for “those who have no voice today” to “have voice and [] be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). the goal is not my personal advancement of sense of fulfillment many battles require politics; however, we live in a polarized and contentious society where civil discourse is an afterthought. as a result, echo chambers and bubbles challenge my mission of effecting positive change. professor paul blaschko warns that “[e]cho chambers…lock us into certain world views” and occur when “groups give up tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). breaking through echo chambers—and staying vigilant to not fall into any myself—is essential for real progress to occur. preventing these chambers begins with listening to opposing views with an open mind and engaging in constructive dialogue, something i will emphasize in my conduct. my mission is to sail away from the safe harbor and make a positive impact. this necessitates leaving my comfort zone and welcoming interactions with people i may not be https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146603 entirely comfortable around. early in the year, i received an email about providing tutoring at the juvenile justice center. if i were to participate in the future, i would have to bridge my personal “gulf of mental judgment and replac[e] it with kinship” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). this initiative would challenge me to live my stated mission and contribute to the life well-lived that i describe in my eulogy by “shar[ing] [my] happiness with others” and “ma[king] a positive impact” (integration three moreau fye week eight). i need to recognize opportunities to strengthen my mission when they present themselves and not pass them up as i did with the juvenile justice center. one way to do this is to force myself to consider the limited time i have on this earth. sister theresa aletheia noble recognizes the inevitability of her death and believes remembering our death “keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau week three). another way is to do what the meruelo family center for career development recommended and “just get out and experience life!” in order to get to know myself. (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). during a conversation with my roommate in early february, i realized that “i don’t [] have to save the world or cure cancer to have a life well-lived at the end of the day” (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). to live a life well-lived, i have to live my mission statement: making a positive impact on the world, serving, growing, loving, and happily accepting myself and others. my pursuit of a life well-lived will not be without challenge (and growth), but my newly minted (but always lived) mission statement will animate my life and guide me during the next three years at notre dame and beyond. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008?module_item_id=168045 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ integration 3 bossone 1 maria finan moreau 4 march 2022 dear 9th grade self: good luck. dear 9th-grader aria, believe it or not, we made it to notre dame! in the next four years, you will work immensely hard to achieve your goals; you will have to take two years of calculus (unfortunately), write your senior these (which you passed with distinction!!), but most importantly, further develop and understand who you are as an individual. i am so proud of where you are now, and where you will go. at notre dame, there is a class for first year students that i know you will love; it is focused on so many topics from mental health to anti-racism to relationships to goodness. this second semester, the entire focus of the course is on a life well-lived: what is is, what inspires it, what guides it, the roles of others in it, and possible obstacles in achieving it. i think that your idea of a life well-lived right now will certainly develop as you move up through high school, but will drastically change even more when you are thrown into a new environment at college. to help you out a bit with this process, i want to take you through my semester in class and explain what we learned but also incorporate my understanding and experiences. our first week was titled “practicing self-reflection” and we sought to answer the question: "what life am i living?" much of this week was focused on reflecting both to bossone 2 understand the past and to decide in what way we will take that information and apply it to our daily lives. when we are so focused on the present, we tend to make the same mistakes that we have made in the past. as we read in one of our readings that week, “it’s precisely those who are busiest [...] who most need to give themselves a break” (iyer). i remember the huge burden that work took on me throughout high school; we were all working, not for the sake of working, but to get into a good college. it was so exhausting, so i advise you to reflect and take breaks. our second week was titled “inspirations of a life well-lived” and we sought to answer the question: "what inspires a life well-lived?" this week, we were assigned to watch the movie “hesburgh,” which described the phenomenal contributions that fr. ted gave not only to notre dame, but to the country and even the world. this movie reminded me of you, a person who has struggled with empathy. i urge you to look more deeply inside yourself, and realize the true empathy that you have; i know it’s there. it took a global pandemic (be prepared) and a worldwide movement for the justice for black lives for me to open up that empathetic side of me. our third week was titled “questions of a life well-lived” and we sought to answer the question: "what questions guide a life well-lived?" this week was pretty dark, but necessary nonetheless. we talked a lot about death and i thought much about the question “if i die right now, or even in the next couple years, would i say that i lived a good life?” now, it’s not the most fair question to ask since i’ve only really made conscious decisions for only a decade, but it’s still a hard question to ponder. i’m more confident in bossone 3 saying yes to that question now than when i was in your shoes. one of our readings was from fr. himes who came up with three questions that could help us make decisions that could lead to a good life: “1) is this a source of joy? 2) is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible? 3) is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large? (himes). i remember asking myself similar questions during the college decision process. however i know that they can apply to all areas of your life, so i encourage you to ask yourself these questions. our fourth week was titled “exploring a life well-lived” and we sought to answer the question: "what are possible ways of living a life well-lived?" this week was very much focused on career choices, something that neither you nor me is confident about. we looked at an article from notre dame’s undergraduate career services office that explained, “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” (career services). it is okay for us to major in a humanities major. it is okay not to be scientifically inclined. we will get through it. our fifth week sought to answer the question "what role do others play in my discernment?" and we had an activity for which we talked to someone that we felt knew us well. as you could probably imagine, i picked mr. neely! i hadn’t talked to him at all since i came to nd, and much of his response actually lined up with some previous moreau concepts, such as the importance of taking breaks and how important it is to be bossone 4 intersectional in our thinking. it was an insightful conversation, so i urge you to go and ask people more about their perspectives on a good life. our sixth week was titled “obstacles to a life well-lived” and we sought to answer the question: "what are personal obstacles to living a life well-lived and how do i respond?" the quote from this week that intrigued me the most was from tasha eurich and her way of describing what questions we should be asking ourselves that allow for the most growth: “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential. why questions stir up negative emotions; what questions keep us curious. why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” (eurich). the biggest obstacle that we often struggle with is ourself. most of the time, i will be the one to overthink things and avoid situations that might make me uncomfortable. but if we can rephrase the way in which we reflect, we will mentally be more set up for success in living a good life. lastly, our seventh week was titled “relationships of a life well-lived” and we sought to answer the question: “what relationships are characteristic of a life well-lived?" we actually read two assignments for this week, one from pope francis and the other from fr. boyle. while both had similar messages of striving towards a world of unity, their deliveries and experiences were pretty much opposite. in his book, fr. boyle said “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” (boyle). judgment is something that we struggle with, but i encourage you to open your eyes and bossone 5 realize that, even though you are an introvert and you like being alone, relationships are very necessary to living a good life. i hope you enjoyed this letter from me, and best of luck in high school (even though i already know everything that happened)! good luck, aria from the future (freshman at nd) bossone 6 works cited week 1: pico iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives” https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: hesburgh movie week 3: fr. michael himes, "three key questions" week 4: undergraduate career services, “navigating your career journey” https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 6: tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: pope francis, “why the only future worth building includes everyone” https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_buildi ng_includes_everyone/transcript fr. boyle, “tattoos on the heart” https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript innagration fo widman 1 maria finan fys 10102-82 29 april 2022 top three: life mission edition based on my modified week 13 qqc personal mission statement, i certainly have aspects of myself that i consider foundational to a meaningful life. i have had the importance of respect stressed to me since i was a very little kid, so i strive to be a man of respect, both respecting those around me and being respected by others. this can be applied to virtually any scenario, which i will get more into later. i also want to explore as many things in life as i can, so being well-rounded will forever be a life goal of mine. i can never try too many new things, and i love having a ton of small hobbies to pass the time. finally, i want to continue to give back to the friends and family members who have made me feel so comfortable, and hope to make everyone feel loved and welcome, especially at notre dame. between just these three missions, i believe i can live a life that is truly well-lived. first (and most importantly), i think mutual respect is one of the most important qualities a person can exhibit. without respecting others, you can’t get much of anywhere in life, and trying to be successful by putting other people down never turns out well in the end. one quote that perfectly summarizes how to treat others' opinions is as follows: “i wanted [people] to speak their minds while letting those who disagreed do the same” (hesburgh, directed by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). especially in a political climate like the u.s. has right now, giving everyone a chance to speak their mind is incredibly important. this takes a lot of respect and self-control, because sometimes what they have to say is directly the opposite of whatever https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 widman 2 you personally believe. usually, listening to their side results in you gaining a new perspective on some issue, which is invaluable when trying to understand others’ opinions. this knowledge of others' opinions is a really great attribute in life well-lived, and respect will get you there. also, when talking to my dad for the week 5 qqc, he talked a little bit about how much respect gains you in life. we were talking about the small interactions that all added up to me making it to notre dame, and he talked about how a lot of them wouldn’t have happened if i hadn’t been respectful to people in random scenarios (“conversation with ronald royal widman” by danny widman moreau fye week five). one such time was in a dairy queen, when i was randomly polite to some customer behind me in line and after talking for a while, i ended up joining his community service group doing pinstriping, which is one of my favorite activities i ever participated in. these small instances of respect can lead to really big things in the long run, which is why i think respect is so important to a meaningful life. finally, and very relevant today, is respecting people of other backgrounds. the university has the right idea, when they say that “we consciously create an environment of mutual respect, hospitality and warmth in which none are strangers and all may flourish” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). if everyone just simply respected others (not varied by race, religion, background, etc.), there would be exponentially fewer societal issues. this isn’t even a crazy or outlandish claim, and simply is being a good person. if you just have normal mutual respect with everyone, you can cruise through life with very few problems, and live a life free from unnecessary judgment. based on these few quotes from moreau activities, i feel very confident that simple mutual respect can go a long way to living a life well-lived. next, i think diversity of experiences is really important on an individual level, and is crucial to my personal life well-lived. i want to do as many “bucket list items” as i can before i https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xzs0cxdr9hkcu-ydog9lahyoqv43zgu-wrcupum0fl8/edit?usp=sharing https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ widman 3 get too old to have fun, and this results in a well-rounded and cultured soul. even the meruelo family center for career development agrees with me, when they say that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i take a lot of pride in my wide range of abilities, and everyone else i’ve met is super anxious to talk about their unique and fun hobbies, too. having a lot of experiences is really what life is all about, and those are the memories you won’t ever lose. even when you’re least expecting them, these experiences shape you forever. another testimony that proves this point is by steve reifenberg, who says “i’ve now worked for the last 25 years within educational institutions on international topics, and in the past decade, without a doubt, my greatest professional satisfaction and joy is that i am a teacher. what happened?” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). even though he has super impressive and notable accomplishments, he still thinks of his days doing lesser things as more meaningful. this is exactly what being well rounded does to a person: with all these different experiences to reminisce on, their biggest accomplishments don’t have to be their favorite parts of life, and they can love the smaller jobs or hobbies just as much. i have really enjoyed hearing about other peoples’ hobbies, and it makes me happy to hear people get excited and passionate about the things they rarely get to talk about. i am reminded that everyone is here at notre dame for a different reason, but that is what makes the university so unique and such a good place. the holy cross constitution puts it perfectly: “all of us are involved in the mission… all of us as a single brotherhood are joined in one communal response to the lord’s mission” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week twelve). this quote goes on to talk about how all different types of people are necessary to https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ widman 4 function in a society, and having lots of people with lots of different experiences certainly makes everyone’s lives around more meaningful and interesting. going off this idea, i have really found the wealth of opinions here to be super beneficial to me. i feel like it can be easy to find that one “inhabits an ideological bubble,” even without doing so on purpose or even noticing that it is happening (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). however, at nd, the student population is very diverse in interests (not to mention backgrounds) and allows you to find someone who likes nearly anything you do. these connections certainly make life more meaningful and allow you to feel like you contribute to the community, which is a definite positive. overall, these 5 quotes all show that diversity of personal experiences leads to a life well-lived for both you and those around you, which is why it is a central third of my mission statement. finally, i think making people feel loved is a great closer to my mission statement. i’ve had a lot of people do this for me, and passing along the favor not only makes their life a little easier, but also gives meaning to your own. specifically when people are going through tough times, even the smallest gestures can make a world of difference. as sister theresa aletheia noble says, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). this light can be something very small: a friendship, a laugh, or just a little bit of hope. all of these can be achieved through super small actions of love, and definitely make both of your lives better. when i think about situations like this, i remember how the lack of verbal assurance can sometimes be pretty rough. like fr. greg boyle, when growing up, “you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge.” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). especially when going through difficult times, hearing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/523770?module_item_id=167901 widman 5 things out loud is often incredibly more effective than just knowing they’re true, like fr. greg stated. again, this backs up my claim that small gestures to make people feel loved can make everyone’s life better, especially during tough situations. at times like these, it is easy to wonder “if god is good, why does he allow suffering into my life?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). at least in my opinion, it is much easier to feel the presence of god when you feel loved by others on earth, since the general feeling transfers to the rest of your life, as well. this connection with god is crucial (to me) for a life well-lived, and i know it is for many others also, which is simply another point to back up my original argument. from these three pieces of evidence, it is clear that making others feel loved is not only beneficial to them, but also makes your life more meaningful. throughout this mission statement analysis, i have talked a lot about my three main beliefs, but i would like to end on what is certainly the most important: we must make the most of every day we have. we are living in a world where everything moves very fast, and life is always just waiting for the next “big thing.” in this respect, we need to listen to pico ayer, who says, “the very people, in short, who have worked to speed up the world are the same ones most sensitive to the virtue of slowing down” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). society always encourages us to move fast, from project to project, and just let the world pass by, however, they then tell us we need to enjoy our time before it’s too late. after writing my eulogy, i realized just how important living in the moment is, and that i truly don’t want to have any regrets of not taking opportunities when i look back on my life. if i make the most of my time, both at nd and in life, i feel that my life will be totally complete, and certainly be well-lived. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ . march 4, 2022 introduction as a generally accepted rule, all languages contain a set of entirely unique words which may not be rendered in another language; they lack perfect translatable synonyms and accordingly do not cross linguistic boundaries. this rule is particularly prominent for the german language, in which lengthy compound words are formed with little restriction – simply through the welding together of shorter terms. one such example is weltanschauung (the title of this composition) which literally means ‘outlook-on-the world.’ the closest translated approximation to this word would be ‘worldview’ – but this is, after all, an approximation; there exists no single english word that carries the same breadth and richness as does the german one. when employed in germany, weltanschauung has come to mean a total, all-encompassing system and structure of ideas that are associated together in harmonious unity – interlocking beliefs surrounding such wide subjects of human life, human values, cultural and religious ideas, politics, economics, and more. as has been said by the irish priest, james murphy, a weltanschauung is “in fact a totalitarian view of human existence.” murphy provides several examples to clarify this point, stating that christianity, therefore, could be defined as a weltanschauung, as could islam and the larger and more radical socialism that triumphed in russia and china. i mention this point because i believe it relates very clearly to the prompt, which has asked that i: identify my convictions; acknowledge my recollective framework upon which they rest; recognise the origins of my convictions; and understand my plans to embody them. in short, i’ve been asked to detail my weltanschauung – quite difficult for a composition of only 1000 words. i shall nonetheless attempt to do so. memory firstly, i have stated that i do fully not know myself; this continues to be true. but while i stand in avowed agreement with this statement, i am indeed quite understanding of my convictions and how they shall dictate the remainder of my life. i may generally, therefore, answer the questions posed above: first, my convictions have manifested as strong desire to engage in service of others and of the public good. second, i wish to embody this primary conviction by entering the realm of american politics. third, i have several memories and associated events upon which i shall draw to achieve this end – and i shall begin with a discussion of these. i have one particularly strong memory which continues to inform my life, my aspirations, and my interactions with others; this recollection has certainly been a guiding factor behind the service-orientation of my weltanschauung. for instance: father himes has contended that persons should arrive at decisions primarily based on joy. 1 would the outcome of this decision, himes asks, serve as a source of joy for the individual? in my case, this memory was the first time i experienced true joy through service (‘joy’ may perhaps fail to fully describe the emotion i felt – i may also employ the word, ‘fulfilment.’) the memory is as follows: during my time in high-school, i, along with one of my friends, founded a non-profit organization dedicated the purpose of providing free, quality education to low-income students. by virtue of my position within the organization, i was exceptionally involved and spent a significant amount of time administrating our various organizations, preparing syllabi, training new teachers, and other similar activities. unsurprisingly, therefore, when witnessing the extreme amounts of time and energy i poured into my work, my peers would often ask, “why? why do you do it?” 1 father michael himes, the three questions weltanschauung what do i believe? quite rapidly, i developed a quick and efferently preprepared response to this sort of question. i did lead the organization’s marketing department after all, and ‘advertising speak’ (as my friends called it) accordingly came rather naturally. i would flash a smile and say something along the lines of, “because i’m dedicated to helping those around me.” did i believe this? honestly, i don’t know. i think, more than anything else, my reply was a meaningless shell pretending to have been imbued with some greater nobility. i had spoken that line so many times that i forgot what it meant. and yet, after my teaching one english class, my weltanschauung would dramatically shift. one man, phillipe, was an exceptional english student. an older gentleman, he was extraordinarily light-hearted; he was able to absorb my material just as effectively as he was able to derail my lessons with quippy remarks and endearing humour. during one such lesson, i asked the students why they had enrolled as part of a greater speaking activity – and i shall never forget phillipe’s reason. after retiring to a nice countryside house, he became critically depressed and lonely. he eventually returned to the city and told me that, while we provided an opportunity for him to learn english, our lessons allowed him to meet new people, forge friendships, and interact with others. that story profoundly impacted me, in a way that cannot possibly be described. i had looked one of our students in the eye, and he had thanked me for the opportunity i had given him. i was given the gift of understanding: understanding the reality of my work – the fact that, as phillipe said, i “helped one old man.” pope francis has said “that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” 2 this brief interaction i shares with phillipe has, in my mind, proven this statement to be true: my existence – the classes and teaching i offered – were deeply tied to his. it is this memory that i draw on when i seek the service of others. conviction how do i know my convictions to be as they are? i may answer only that they provide me with a sense of meaning and fulfilment – an idea quite relevant to deresiewicz’s discussion of the overwhelming emotions of meaninglessness and misery experienced by college students across the modern scholastic environment. 3 i have written before about the logic supporting my weltanschauung in this sense – how i strongly believe in the concept elucidated by viktor frankl: that meaning is found in purpose (purposefully dedicating oneself to an individual or cause), and with such meaning one may find joy and fulfilment – and shall therefore not belabour this point. i would therefore rather briefly discuss how i know this service-oriented conviction to be authentically mine. first, there is the aforementioned contention that i do indeed find joy in service – but i also find joy in snow skiing and watching star wars, despite the fact that i would not identify either of these as personal convictions. and thus intervenes father himes’ third question: “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” 4 helping others to lead more enjoyable lives is, i would contend, a genuine service to those around me. the world needs people to help people, and i am happy to fill this role. i therefore might state that i know my convictions to be so because they fulfil both father himes’ first and third criterion – but i also believe to have come to understand my convictions through self-reflection. tasha eurich argues, quite clearly, that too much reflection may actually be negative to the individual, stating, “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives.” 5 clearly, dr. eurich is not overly-fond of self-reflection – but it was precisely through this critical method of examining my beliefs and values that i came to understand what i value, and why. only after thinking and examining myself was i able to truly discover and understand my conviction for service. 2 pope francis, april 2017 3 deresiewicz, 2014 4 father michael himes, the three questions 5 tasha eurich, june 2, 2017 moreau capstone integration father kevin the end all be all arrives at duncan hall first day of the semester… *blinks my eyes* writing this moreau final paper at the end of my second semester at notre dame. it is crazy how fast this first year at notre dame went. i’m scared that these four years at this wonderful institution will pass by before i know it and i will then have to face the real world. before i went to my first moreau class back in the first semester, i knew that this class would be something that i would love. a class at more of a slower pace, where reflection is the most important aspect of it. back in high school, i had a class extremely similar to moreau: respective spiritual being (rsb). and although i liked to learn more of the more academic subjects like physics, computer science, and mathematics; i just remembered that the rsb class that i had back in high school was probably one of the most important classes i took. it also meant the most to me. never in my life have i really had the chance to just sit down and reflect on what has happened in my life. growing up in the biggest city in the world meant that i would continuously have to be moving, be doing something. most of the time the activities that i had to do was not even optional, all of them were mandatory. and that meant that i did not have a lot of time to myself, let alone reflect upon myself. throughout this second semester, i learned something that is probably the most important thing i have discovered so far. and that is that, you only live once, so take full advantage of it. back in high school or middle school i definitely knew that this discovery existed, but only in this past year at college did i realize how little time i have at this specific point in life. i’m glad that i discovered this breakthrough in my life at this specific point i’m in right now. even though it is quite late, i’m glad to have discovered it now. now i understand why when the high school alumni back in shanghai’s only advice when they came back and visited was to enjoy high school and make the most out of it. but, growing up in an asian household honestly limited the ability to do that. there was always a consensus that doing a lot of academic work and working on the typical hard skills were more important. i’m glad that i went to an international school in shanghai though, as during the school hours i was able to work on a lot of my soft skills those that are important in the real world. and when i got my hesburgh-yusko and greater china scholars scholarship, i realized how much people appreciated the leadership one may have, and other soft skills in the world. when i was introduced to the scholarships, specifically the hesburgh-yusko one, i finally understood how important leadership and service are in this world. growing up, the main goal that a child in asia may have is to have a stable future. but slowly, i discovered that working in such a big corporate company and making a steady six figures wasn’t that important. the more important things like service were the things that could really change the world. (week 1 qqc, how have i embarked as a student on my college journey) yes, i want to make a change in the world, but that can only start through acts of service and just awareness of the world. and even in this second semester, i experienced the same thing where i wanted to work at tiffany and co this summer, a more corporate structured company. but as i went through more interviews with different companies, i figured out that working at tiffany and co would not impact that many people, thus this is why i wanted to choose a company called copia. what they do is connect restaurants and hotels (hospitality industry companies) with food banks and homeless shelters, and they also use analytics to advise how much food should be purchased in the first place. this is something that i know would definitely make an impact on a population. this is what makes me happy, is good for my mental health, and i’m not lying to myself about this cause. (week 3 reflection, the three questions) through this, i realized i wanted to make a social impact more than one in the corporate world. what is the point of helping the already rich people, when the gap between the rich and the poor just keeps on increasing? this is something my grandma has always told me to do. she has been a mentor of mine since the day i was born. she used to always tell me that she grew up eating plain rice and plain bread for meals. she has always emphasized the importance of serving others and putting others before yourself. (week 4 reflection, mentors) but at least i now understand this concept. that itself would take up quite a bit of courage to realize. “so it's perfectly natural to have doubts, or questions, or even just difficulties. the question is, what do you do with them? do you suppress them, do you distract yourself from them, do you pretend they don't exist? or do you confront them directly, honestly, courageously?” deresiewicz, week 7. i’m extremely glad that i chose to come to notre dame. this holistic education is something that i believe no other school offers. the ability to grow as a notre dame student speaks more measures than the ability to grow up as a harvard student. and it shows in statistics too. more notre dame business students are recruited by the big three business companies than those coming from the “grand” ivy leagues. and i wouldn’t say notre dame is the perfect school, specifically in the lack of diversity and education in the different cultures around the world. i’ve dealt with racist remarks, and i still believe as stated in my week 5 reflection, that the modern-day frankenstein is racism. and i realized that as soon as i came to notre dame on my first day here. when the admission officers at the presentation kept emphasizing and being proud that this year’s notre dame class is the most diverse. it was almost like they were boasting about it when honestly it isn’t that impressive compared to other institutions. but i won’t lie, notre dame is notre dame for its amazing community here. and that was a big reason why i chose to come here. there is never a moment when you can be lonely when you’re not deliberately trying to be alone. there is not a moment where you cannot gain the support you need at the specific moment. and when i was at my lowest points, specifically in my heartbreak introspection reimagined phase, i knew that i could reach out to anyone and receive the support i needed. (week 6 qqc, introspection reimagined) however, something that must be mentioned is the fact that a lot of people, especially men with their toxic masculinity try to hide the fact that they are dealing with a lot of mental issues. some often think that they can deal with it themselves but end up struggling. “the evidence says they do not. a large-scale survey of college freshmen recently found that self-reports of emotional well-being have fallen to their lowest level in the twenty-five-year history of the study.” deresiewicz, week 1. the quote just stated just goes to show that it is statistically proven that a lot of college students are struggling with mental health. this is something that i hope notre dame does do a better job of doing. the students are already doing enough to help one another but it is time that the school itself does too. the crazy thing about how i discovered the university that i now can somewhat call home was through my ex-girlfriend. she goes here and is currently a sophomore. and she reached out to me during my college application process and recommended i look into a specific program here. that was the business analytics program here and that is currently one of the two majors i will be pursuing here at notre dame. and although we broke up a long time ago, we still maintained as friends. “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future.” reifenberg. she was someone that would accompany me whenever i needed her to help me through anything. she was my best friend before we dated, and i would still call her someone that is extremely meaningful to me even today. she was the person that would put her things aside and accompany me through my problems. (week 10 reflection, accompagnateur). i love it here, this is my home under the dome. i can’t even go back home this summer, but being at notre dame brought me a family that is irreplaceable. thank you father kevin for being a mentor that absolutely means a lot to me. you were honestly the person that was able to make the transition to notre dame feel super easy, and i appreciate that. i’m glad i’m here, and i wouldn’t change a thing. maechen wang moreau fye 3/3/2022 a life well-lived while we focus on moving through life in modern society—how to earn money, how to gain intelligence, how to become a more respectable person—we often forget to stop and reflect on ourselves. considering how short our lives may turn out to be, it becomes even more important for us to understand ourselves. “the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one) maechen wang, or mae as she likes to be known, has realized this in her life, and i can say that she has done her best to live a life well-lived. deeper connections have always been important to mae, and this stems from her education at notre dame. learning to mingle different viewpoints was always something that mae valued and studying at the university taught her to appreciate different kinds of people. coming from an international background, where most people were of one race, one religion, and one political party, it was hard for her at first to understand differences in people but talking to the increasingly diverse student body on campus made her change her views. she then “always wanted to bring in different views, whether that was a republican president or a democratic president,” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two) and this allowed her to see behind exterior appearances to understand people as they truly were. mae never shied away from difficult questions, either, and found that self-reflection was an incredibly important part of self-growth. she found meaning in intrapersonal development, and could always be found asking others reflective or pensive questions: “where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three) late night conversations with friends and family, whether it be on serious topics such as personal identity or casual subjects such as music and movies, were always some of her favorite parts of the day. focusing on understanding herself and validating her feelings was something that made her different from others. while mae was goal driven and had her own ambitions in life, she also believed that life was not all about material wealth or fame. instead, she found meaning in the people around her, and she strongly believed that the way people shaped you was much more important than what you could ever achieve on your own. mae valued her feelings, her experiences, and the ones of the people around her. if she were here, she would have agreed that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not.” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four) this made her valued by the people around her. her friends found solace in confiding in her when times were rough, and she always had a stable shoulder to cry on available (moreau fye week five). mae found that being happy and enjoying life in the moment was what she most valued, and this all stemmed from her ability to put others first while valuing her own emotions. while mae was https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjnb%2biweib%2fsur74mdsrmsbelu0khjto0j72asyzhqseo%2frcvr49%2btapy%2fvnjwezfh9nxmpslwnk9mu7ow9phdaiznpxmytl%2fpiyrhrqybsp0uzo1%2bqq5oxqpdfovs5zlnycj4m2jetwbznitqywwrkhpjkhuhzkyrllrhiiwrezix4y5jzfdfwhvpjlgrhknpcb5xzooo648o53lnz0j8ejvhkmxiovqtrpyy6gosbh8n%2bmgyoe%2fn8u9i8lsvr4uxjizd3qcz5g17diwrmnlrd0lurfff89snteqyosfltbg3sdsw6byuqmirtvcmztfxobxyy0snnuyjk9wpvpdxdcswskrh4numklxut%2bcx4f6ph4x7xsfbhptshbaizn4hmy8urcxzplrdvdfmfbo3nflkdsw5ty0medvszo%2fegwiajvlqevug%2f9p%2fcrt5b2or%2fbi%2f4f5gzopo3sxy%2bq7ax%2bphmmwzfrzyoemcdfbenzsfntu%2b%2fbfip&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=pm%2byyul65y0mhi%2bgmxmblp73e%2burd5w1045vjgi6hjs1%2fxkspfvlmlhrfgbwk5ueagv5pjjzadreu1sp6ml5rt3vsnzpkilhmc%2bsuyn92wci7jq7hz2tm%2f%2bobzbeu1d84jphwe9c0wgnk5tgenryccyosbaw1wqv7yei%2bc9txsqktsqaincfcdu8mawsz%2fot2oorkfcfomatydggpwazwife3krtewcexkiby9s%2bsekmmcaoce20v%2boimifw9lovlbal6ibnmj7cjnig%2fgzmqkygoau20%2btxebcun2k7631c%2brca%2bap1ou7ywhob6a9sqqahydtm0rlymrksm9zong%3d%3d https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ certainly a high achiever and may even be an overachiever, her academic successes provided her with confidence, and her social relationships provided her with mental and emotional support. don’t get me wrong, mae was human and being human entails imperfection. it means dealing with pain, dealing with loss, and dealing with distress. but mae found this early on, and accepted that suffering is a crucial part of our lives. she found that suffering “is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six) only by understanding suffering and why we suffer can we move on to understand how we respond to it. mae found that responding to suffering through self-reflection was the most ideal method of coping with pain. mae focused on healthy reflections, on how she could learn to be a better person, to grow and develop as individuals, to differentiate between healthy and unhealthy ways of reflecting on herself. mae’s recognition of herself has always aided her in forming lifelong relationships, as seen from those of us present at this funeral. mae has always had faith in fate, and her belief that “love never fails and will always find a way to have its way.” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week seven) has really shone through in her life. whether it be romantic relationships or platonic ones, mae has always believed that a mutual effort is needed in order to sustain the bond and has never wasted time supporting a connection that was not both sided. she kept this in mind while making new friends, while finding new partners, while connecting and reconnecting again with her family members. though mae valued her relationships greatly, to the point where she was willing to drop individual accomplishments for the sake of the other, she was also level headed when choosing relationships worth her time. she supported relationships in which participants treated each other with tenderness and looked down upon ones where an imbalance of power existed. she found that it was important for both to be willing to build and help the other develop to become a better form of themselves and has worked to recognize this type of bond throughout her life. walking alongside mae through her life has been very lifechanging. she was different in a way that brightened up the people around her, supportive in a way that made us feel at home, and understanding of both herself and of the people around her. she found joy in the little things in life, chose others over herself, and was always there to offer help, advice, or just be an audience. mae was a truly unique person, and she will be dearly missed by all of us present. word count: 1024 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/523831?module_item_id=167962 integration 3 anthony g. battaglia moreau first year experience d. espeseth when the last chapter of my life is written how do i want to be remembered? i want to be remembered as a kind, honest person i want to be remembered for being able to put a smile on other people’s faces i want to be remembered as someone who was happy in their life and helped to brighten up others’ life as well i want to be remembered for my witty jokes and goofy demeanor i want to be remembered for being a good listener and comforter i want to be remembered as a good dad, a fun grandpa, and a lifelong friend how do i define a life well lived? a life well lived is one in which the person who lived it was proud of their life a life well lived is one in which the person who lived it enjoyed their life and wouldn’t trade it for any other a life well lived is one in which the person who lived it fully came to understand and accept themself. a life well lived is one in which the people who were a part of it were glad they were a life well lived is one in which the people who were a part of it were happier and more fulfilled by being part of it a life well lived in one in which the people who were a part of it were inspired to live better lives themselves a life well lived is one in which the world was made better off, not necessarily on some massive scale, but in some way shape or form a positive difference was made a life well lived is one that is done in accordance with god’s will what would be observable signs of a life well lived? an observable sign of a life well lived is the happiness of the person living it an observable sign of a life well lived is the strength of the the relationships the person living it made an observable sign of a life well lived is how others act around the person living it an observable sign of a life well lived is what the person living it did with their time an observable sign of a life well lived is how the person living it helped others i want to be remembered for kindness in all aspects. i want to be remembered for being charitable, kind to animals, and empathetic toward everyone i meet. i want to be remembered for being honest, yet not harsh. i want to be remembered for never breaking promises, always following through, and being able to tell people what they need to know in a way that doesn’t hurt their feelings. i want to be remembered with a smile on my face and i smile on all the faces of everyone around me. i want to be remembered as someone you couldn’t help to stay mad around, someone who could make even the most sour at least chuckle. i want to be remembered for making awful dad jokes and puns. i want to be remembered for making good jokes too, for having an inhuman sense of comedic timing. i want to be remembered as someone who people could come to with anything and feel that they will be heard, understood, and respected. i want to be remembered as a dad who loved my children as much as possible and did everything i could to make them happy in life. i want to be remembered as a husband who was both best friends and soul mates with his wife. i want to be remembered as a grandpa who maybe spoiled his grandchildren a little too much, and always had a story on hand to tell. i want to be remembered as a friend who was always there when needed, a friend that truly was a fried to the very end. i want to have been proud of the life i lived, when it comes to my final years i want to have as few regrets as possible. i want to reflect on every stage life and remember it fondly, to never think i wish i had done this or that. i want to be completely satisfied with my life, to have truly enjoyed it and lived it the way i want, the way most true to me. i don’t want to conform and do what everyone else does, i want to look back and be proud that i stood my ground when i did and stuck to my beliefs. i want the people i loved and cared about to have been glad i was a part of their life. when it’s time for me to go i don’t want them to be sad and think ‘i wish i had told him this, or done that with him’, or anything like that. i want them to think ‘i’m glad to have had him in my life’ as a father, a husband, a friend, or whatever other relationship we had. i want the people who were in my life to reflect back on the time we spent together and be inspired to live their lives in a similar manner. i don’t mean that as them doing what i did, but them doing it with the spirit i did. to stand their ground even if we have different beliefs, to do what makes them happy not me, to live their own definition of a life well lived. i want to have made a positive impact on the people and world around me. i want it to have been clear i lived my life well by seeing the smile upon my face as i grew old. by seeing how connected i was with those around me. that my relationships weren’t based on obligation or blood, but rather that the people in my life were there because they wanted to be. i want it to have been observable that my life was well lived because of how happy the people around me were, and how i spent my time serving, talking with, or helping others in my life. whether it be with my time, resources, or knowledge i want it to be obvious that i lived a life well lived by the many and various ways i helped others. finally, i want to have lived my life in accordance with god’s plan for it, i hope my life will have been one that would make him proud, and that when it ends i’ll go to eternal peace and rest with him. week 8 integration defining a life well-lived kelly harrington moreau fys 10102 51 4 march 2022 it gets better if you’re sitting in this room, thank you for taking the time to come here. i never thought i’d be writing my own eulogy, yet here i am. i hope that by the end of this you will have something of me to remember me by and that you all know that my gratitude and appreciation for you are endless. as a side note: for so much of my life, i struggled to not be overly self-critical and needed to be reminded that i need to be kinder to myself and was often taken off guard when told that i am perceived differently by others than i perceive myself (moreau fye week five). i hope that this reading will do justice to the me you have in your minds. now, onto the reading. my goal throughout it all, i suppose, was to live a life well-lived. when this concept was first introduced to me, i wasn’t quite sure what it meant but thought that i had a good enough understanding of it and didn’t really bother to dig any deeper than was required. having lived past that initial introduction, however, has allowed me to learn that it is so much more than what i first imagined it to be. at the time, i was rather depressed and while i was going to therapy, a lot of life seemed like a drag and so much work to get through. when asked about my future plans, i could give you an answer, but it definitely wouldn’t be the truth as i didn’t know what it was that i wanted to do. not that there’s anything wrong with that, i just had no clue what i wanted to do so i was pretending otherwise and was slowly suffocating under self-placed expectations that really weren’t sustainable in the long term. i had placed all of my future plans around the fact that i disliked stem a little less so my major and class were going to revolve around that fact. as stated earlier, not sustainable. after all, “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” and that’s exactly how i felt as i struggled through classes and turning assignments in ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). at that point in time, everything was exhausting, but maybe not how you may imagine. something as simple as picking up the phone may seem like an arduous task to others. studies have shown that “it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call” (“why we need to slow down our live” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). while picking up a phone call may have drained me, the general apathy i felt on a day to day basis meant that getting out of bed or walking to get food were harder tasks for me to accomplish. eventually though, things get better. this is something that i have found people like to say: “it gets better.” what they are leaving out though, is that sometimes it requires a tremendous amount of effort to get better. i had a terrific amount of help getting to where i got; many of you are probably in this room and i thank you for all of your efforts you are loved and appreciated. with all of the assistance that i received, life became more manageable and things truly did get better. one of the biggest things that i dived into with my newly renewed vigor for life was fighting for those who could not fight for themselves. inspired greatly by fr. ted hesburgh, c.s.c. of the university of notre dame and his deeds that reflected how he became “the conscience of the country on civil rights,” i hoped to do my part in upholding that legacy both as an alumni of notre dame but also as a human being who recognized the need for equality (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and crhistine o’malley moreau fye week two). having lived through a time of mass school shootings, a movement for black lives, my home https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 state catching on fire every so often, places in the south freezing over, and a global pandemic before even reaching the lively age of twenty, the need for the world ro do better was undeniably obvious. with the principle to “ just focus what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet,” i hope i was able to bring about some change in the communities that i was able to touch, even if the change is not long lasting (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). for so long, i thought that a life well-lived meant that i would be leaving behind a legacy, something that would show the way that i had made my mark on the world. instead, i have discovered over the years that the most important thing to me in the end was a feeling of self-fulfillment. so what if no one will remember me in a hundred years? i refuse to let myself be constrained by the expectations and standards of others even in death. i’ll say it right now: i may have regrets but my life was well-lived by my own standards. i was able to find my people and my place in the world and will die content and there is almost nothing more i can ask for. speaking of which, i can and will ask for something from you, my dear people, so listen up. remember you will die. this may seem like just a pithy statement that was all the rage back when i was younger, but “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). if you do your best to live a life well-lived, regardless of whether you are able to accomplish that or not, this concept is a great way to keep your goals in sight. this is also probably something that i would have gotten tattooed on myself if i wasn’t so afraid of needles, but i digress. i hope that at some point during this reading you have learned something that you will be able to keep with you. if not, i will leave you with one last quote: “how wonderful would it be, while we discover https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html faraway planets, to rediscover the needs of the brothers and sisters orbiting around us” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). and lastly, a reminder: it gets better. it may be hard but it will get better and once it does, you have the rest of your life ahead of you so don’t be afraid to live a life well-lived. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript eulogy speech for the great , spoken by morgan freeman moreau integration assignment three: “with great power, comes great responsibility,” a quote from spiderman’s uncle ben. while sophie was an avid marvel fan, she herself had great power. that power was inspiring those around her and keeping a positive attitude even when things got tough. she’s an inspiration to us all and even with her gone, her spirit and energy are still with us. sophie was born in lake orion, michigan on the night of a crazy snowstorm. the first born to tara and stephen novak who as they watched their daughter grow, described her as “purposeful and bright” and as she grew up, was someone you could sit and reflect with. allowing for the company to speak for itself, because as she learned, the art of stillness is a great way to find inner peace, and that’s one of the reasons why we know sophie lived a great and beautiful life. (why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted – moreau f.y.e. week one) “the very essence of leadership is that you have to have vision. you can’t blow an uncertain trumpet.” this quote spoken by theodore hesburgh really emulates sophie’s leadership direction and is something that all of us here today can appreciate. when she was the president of the united states, she had to make some important calls that would influence the nation and string of events. because of her amazing leadership and quick decisive thinking, she was able to stop the potential danger from the aliens and form a peace treaty that is still in effect today. she mentioned to me a few years ago that she wanted people to listen to her without trying to be the loudest in the room. her actions spoke loudly, and it made people listen. (hesburgh,” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau f.y.e. week two) one thing that everyone in this stadium can agree on is sophie’s gratefulness towards any situation. even after she won gold four olympics in a row, she still had tears streaming down her face every time she was on that podium. her faith in god and love for the opportunities she’s had inspires all of us to “not suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness.” sophie’s understanding of the opportunities given to her allowed her to live with no regrets. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, ny times – moreau f.y.e. week three) “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life.” this quote from meruelo family center for career development text, is very evident in sophie’s case. we all heard the story by now that she almost flunked out of notre dame because of how badly she was doing in her mendoza classes. when she realized that business was not the right path, she knew her passion of writing would be a helpful factor in developing a future that would suite her strengths best. and because she took the leap to explore her passions in a career, she is the bestest-selling author ever with many amazing books that have captivated the hearts of many. (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau f.y.e. week four) many people cherish sophie, but her mom had an especially important relationship with her. her mother would call her “an old soul” and “a mature women at such a young age.” sophie has always been able to think rationally throughout decision in her life. this was especially evident when she had to decide if she would accept the engagement to the then prince of france or continue with her duties to the united states. her mom said “everything [she] did always worked out, one way or another.” one of sophie’s passions was running and when she ran it was obvious to everyone watching her compete that she was doing something that she loved. even when she had to take a break from her injuries after engaging in a sword fight with the members of the dark reunion, everyone saw her “in the zone” during those times. her ability to stay focused on tasks as extraneous as racing, carried over into other aspects of her life. when it came to being the president or protecting the endangered elephants of africa, she would put her all into whatever she was doing, and for that, we are eternally grateful. (“conversation with mom, february 18, 2022, week 5.” – moreau f.y.e. week five). even with the idea that sophie was the most perfect being to ever exist in the entire universe. she still struggled with many things, one of them being the idea of mindfulness. “…the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves.” she told her sisters multiple times that asking these deep questions of herself gave her anxiety and made her feel depressed, but after several years of putting it off, she finally decided to do something about it. so, she flew to india and engaged in a month of solitude with buddhist monks to find what she was looking for. after this period, she came back renewed and was ready to tackle the rest of her life now being comfortable with herself, knowing herself. she said the key to finding herself was asking the what questions instead of the why. sophie would describe herself as an overthinker and when she switched her thought process, she said it made all the difference in not blaming herself for silly things. (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau f.y.e. week six) even though it is a tragedy that someone so great has left this earth, we can still hold on to all the memories that we have shared with her to keep her in our hearts. his holiness pope francis said in his speech why the only future worth building includes everyone, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow.” a takeaway from this is that using the wisdom that sophie has shared with us, we can have a community where everyone is loved and united. her lasting impression can be used as guidance to surround yourself with not just people with positive characteristics but also people who need someone there for them too. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau f.y.e. week seven) thank you, , for being a part of our lives. we will forever cherish you and are going to miss you deeply. intergation 3 professor polotto moreau fye integration 3 march 4, 2022 my sister’s life well lived kristi eve murphy-iaquinta, my big sister, was born on december 24th, 1980. from then on she has strived to live the best life possible. growing up, she developed many goals and aspirations that gave her a special spark. she has always strived for the best, despite hardships, and, overtime, has become the best, most influential big sister. kristi is selfless and kind. she has lived her whole life that way. she has definitely created a life well lived. since i can remember, i have always strived to be just like my sister kristi. she did sports like gymnastics and cheer when she was young and on top of that, she graduated high school to continue her studies at notre dame. only a few days after i was born, kristi graduated from notre dame. i am so lucky to have experienced how amazing she is as she teaches me to be the best version of myself. not only has she accomplished so much, but her life has been enjoyable at the same time. through her enjoyment of life, kritsti has positively impacted the lives of others, including myself. to be honest, as i’m writing this, i wonder if i am the best person to summarize my sister’s life. i’ve only known her since she was 22. i missed a whole half of her life. it is like she's a legend to me; i get to hear all the stories of her youth as if they are old tales. one story about kristi that is most memorable is her time in gymnastics. my other sister coreen who is a year younger than kristi was an amazing gymnast like my mom. she was on the national team competing for team usa and was preparing for the olympics. naturally, kristi wanted to be a gymnast too. gymnastics wasn’t as easy for kristi. kristi would get so nervous before meets that she would throw up every time. in gymnastics it is clear that “there’s no questioning the need for clarity and focus, especially when the stakes are highest.”. (why we need to slow down in our lives moreau week 1). stakes were high for kristi, but she knew she needed to slow down. without taking something off her plate, she wouldn’t be able to find clarity or focus. therefore, kristi quit gymnastics. it was honorable of her to listen to herself. she knew what she needed to do to make her life the most enjoyable it could be. i admire this about kristi. as kristi got older, my family realized that she was truly brilliant. much like the domer dozen from week two of moreau, kristi went on to be a successful notre dame grad. like dr. claire conely from the domer dozen, kristi was “a psychology major at notre dame” and also pursued a minor in computer science (domer dozenmoreau fye week 2). like myself, kristi had a hard time adjusting to life at notre dame. although our grandparents live in south bend, kristi and i both felt homesick. eventually though, much like sister aletheia, kristi looked for her purpose at notre dame asking, “where am i headed, where do i want to end up” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die moreau fye week 3). this forward thinking mindset allowed kristi to realize that notre dame was the foundation for her future and that she needed to see it through. she knew that notre dame would jump-start her career and that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip”; it takes lots of effort and planning but the destination is worth it (navigating your career journeymoreau fye week 4). kristi’s destination sure was worth it. she went on to work in psychology in chicago and make a good living. later she decided to leave psychology behind and pursue a career in social media and blogging. she became very successful making appearances in magazines like bon appetit. kristi’s journey at notre dame and beyond are part of the reason i chose to go to notre dame. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/146843 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/146843 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/146897 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/147000 after kristi became established, she began to settle down. she bought a house close to us in arizona and had a long term boyfriend. soon enough, she was engaged. she had a longer engagement taking time for “self reflection” which is important to create a life well lived (the right way to be introspective moreau fye week 6). with her history at notre dame, it was important to kristi to be married in the basilica at notre dame. she went through this whole process to reserve a spot at the basilica and it was so exciting. experiencing this was another point of inspiration for me. her experience gave me something to look forward to. after getting married, kristi started to have kids. she became the best mom because she did and still is “bridging the gulf of mutual judgment and replacing it with kinship” when it comes to parenting (tattoos on the heart-moreau fye week 7). i admire her as a mother and as a sister and her parenting makes me excited to be a mom. kristi enhances her life and those of me and her kids through her lack of judgment and generosity. even after notre dame, my sister kristi has continued to manifest a life well lived. in conclusion, my sister kristi is a true example of how to create a life well lived. she has accomplished many things while maintaining her character. in addition, she continues to be an inspiration to many, including me. when i feel like i don’t have a good idea of how to create a life well lived, i look towards my sister. she has accomplished so much and her life isn’t over yet. she possesses all the qualities of one who creates a life well lived. kristi lacks judgment, she slows down when she needs to, she reflects on where she is headed and she positively impacts others while doing it. i can’t explain enough how thankful i am to have such an amazing sister to look up to. while i can’t write my own eulogy yet, i hope when i am at that place one day some of my sister's strengths are included. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/147135 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/147135 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/523831?module_item_id=167962 integration 3 gardes1 bailey bushman moreau fye 4 march 2022 who tells your story? if the broadway play hamilton taught us anything, it was that it is almost impossible to determine the legacy you leave behind. we work so hard to leave a lasting impression on the world, but we ultimately have no control over how our story gets told after us. today, i am here to tell katie’s story, but it is hard to do it justice. katie lived her life to the fullest with a desire to help those around her, and she got up every day pursuing this passion. i can say without a doubt that katie experienced a life well-lived, so let us reflect on what she has accomplished and how she influenced those around her. katie worked extremely hard throughout her entire life, through the good and the bad. when times got overwhelming, she took a step back because she realized that “the more time [you] spend away from [your] work, the better that work will be, most often” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). at a young age, she was able to realize that living your own life is more important than living the life others want you to live, and this helped her pave her own path. when she did lose track of herself and her goals, she was able to acknowledge that and redirect herself rather than avoid it. she recognized that “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh'') by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). she knew that admitting failure was hard but necessary for growth. she never forgot the pain and failures of her life, but she made sure to embrace the joy and happiness more than anything. these traits i just mentioned about katie were reflected not only in her daily life but in her career, as well. she acted as a role model for many younger women as she became a https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 gardes2 successful orthopedic surgeon, a field dominated by men. she showed those around her that, when you put your mind to something, you can achieve anything. she wanted to support the other women around her to do the sameto be the best they could be. she had a calling to the medical profession, combining her love of stem with her passion for helping others. she made sure that her profession tapped into her talents and embodied what she loved because she knew that “joy always pushes us forward” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). she worked to reach her goal, and she did. while she loved her job with every ounce of her being, katie also found joy in smaller hobbies, making sure not to restrict her interests. she used her cooking and baking skills as a method of relaxation while also bringing happiness to those around her who would share these meals with her. she used her artistic talents to bring unique creations into the world, commenting on the beauty of the world around her. she found a love of walking– of exploring her city. she learned not to take for granted the pleasures of life because she knew that life was not always easy. she worked through the hardest time of her life, after being diagnosed with an eating disorder, because she knew that it could only get better; she recognized that life “is not always linear…” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week 4), and it helped her push through. these hard times helped her recognize the importance of leaning on others when you needed to most and being there for those around you just the same. as her grandmother mentioned, katie was driven by her passion for helping others and deepening her knowledge, and there was no doubt she did that throughout her lifetime (discernment conversation activity with patti gardes week moreau fye week 5). she made sure to spend time meditating and reflecting on herself and her goals, allowing her to have https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ gardes3 deeper insight into who she was and what she was experiencing and to be present and experience “stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). when she doubted herself, she turned to those around her for support, and she was not afraid to admit to her struggles; she found that revealing these struggles and being vulnerable was the only way to truly build connections with others because it is how others empathize. katie truly understood that “...life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fys week 7). she worked to foster relationships with friends, family, and patients, being fully aware that it was these connections that brought deep meaning to life. she built a beautiful friendship with her sister, fixed her relationship with her father, found a model in her mother, and lived and laughed with friends. she even developed bonds with her patients. after all, it’s one of the main reasons she was driven to the medical field– to connect with a wider community and give back by building stronger relationships. at the end of the day, katie knew that death was inevitable, and she accepted that by not letting the fear of death stop her from making the most of every second of her life. she worked to develop strong virtues and personality traits, she was successful in her professional career, and she cared deeply about those around her. she was passionate, hardworking, and loving. she was a leader to other women in the medical field. she left a lasting impression on everyone she encountered. today, i am the lucky one who gets to tell her story, and she will forever be a model of someone who lived a life well-lived. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript moreau capstone integration jayden vrins catherine wagner april 29, 2022 moreau capstone integration inspire, provide, and create as a junior in high school just beginning to think about college, i had very little idea of what i wanted to do and what my purpose in this world would be. through the application process and my first year at notre dame, however, i have been able to better understand myself and thus have found what truly inspires me in my pursuit of knowledge. ultimately, my mission is to foster more diversity in higher education and build a school in curacao that will provide kids with the resources to attend the very best schools in the united states and the world. as i continue my journey at notre dame, i hope to utilize the values, relationships, and knowledge i develop to build on my mission and make it a reality. my time in moreau and notre dame has allowed me to become a more complete student, family member, and member of society. this will help me to fulfill my mission and live a life well-lived. one of the first things i learned was the importance of separating myself from the hectic nature of school and work. in the article, “why we need to slow our lives down?” they explain, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (“why we need to slow our lives down?” by pico lyer, moreau week one). another important development for me this year was adjusting to my new schedule in college and the vast amount of free time i have. this was both a positive and a negative. although i had a lot of time to relax, the amount of free time i had caused me to be extremely complacent early in the year. for this reason, i forced myself to always be busy and do something productive. in doing this, i put a lot of pressure on myself which was extremely unhealthy. the article by tasha eurich, states, “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action.”(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, moreau week six). my introspection caused me to be extremely negative about my work habits, thus forcing me to constantly compensate by doing work all the time. when i had a conversation with my mom during the interview week for moreau, she also told me that my biggest flaw was that i was too hard on myself. this was important to hear from another person as it forced me to confront the truth. ultimately, i believe that it is important to balance life, work, and mental health to work on my mission statement and live a life well-lived. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ another huge aspect of living a life well-lived is accompaniment. whether with family, friends, or community, the accompaniment will always be a huge aspect of my life. as steve reifenberg explains in his story, “the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future. “(teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg, moreau week 9). to summarize, reifenberg explains that we, as humans, are all on the journey of life together and for that reason, we should always come to each other's aid. one of the main reasons that i want to give back to my community is my appreciation of the position i am in today. i recognize that i am extremely fortunate and realize that i would not be in the spot i am in today without people helping me get here. for this reason, it is almost my responsibility to help others achieve their potential as well. another one of my goals is to be an inspiration. without those who inspired me, i would not have even applied to notre dame. my economics teacher served as one of my biggest inspirations in high school to pursue economics. the stories of both father hesburgh and terrel hunt were also influential in helping me understand what i can do with the education i receive at notre dame. terrel hunt's short biographical explains, " as a career member of the u.s. foreign service, he works to strengthen global security, protect american citizens, and promote values that advance peace and universal human rights.”(domer dozen gallery, moreau week two). hunt took the rounded and complete education he received at notre dame and is now using it to promote good in our world. terrel hunt’s story gave me a lot of motivation as he showed me that a notre dame education was worthwhile to foster change. although terrel hunt and my economics teacher in high school put me on the path to finding a solid career, i ultimately decided to major in both business analytics and economics because i felt that they suited my interests, skills, and desires perfectly. as the meruelo family center for career development explains, “....... career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills”(meruelo family center for career development, moreau week four). ultimately, the most important factors when deciding on a career path are happiness and purpose. one has to realize first if the career path will bring them joy and then if it will ultimately fulfill them and their purposes as community members and children of god. despite the big goals i have in my mission statement, throughout moreau i have learned to appreciate the journey as well as the destination. an important part of living a life well-lived is cherishing every little moment that comes your way. every moment is special and every moment is a gift from god. as sister theresa aletheia explains “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness, she said. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.”( '' meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, sister theresa aletheia, moreau week three). i truly believe that it is in the face of death that we truly recognize life’s blessings. when my uncle died early on in this semester it was extremely difficult for me as i was away from my family and did not get the chance to go to the funeral. despite this, it made me https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html appreciate what i had and that i was still here able to achieve my goals and dreams. he was a great man and was always kind to others, putting everyone else in front of himself. he lived a life well-lived and inspires me to live a life that would make him proud. ultimately, anyone can live a life that inspires change even if it is the smallest of differences. in his speech, “why the only future worth building includes everyone”, the pope states “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, moreau week 7). the pope goes on to explain that love requires sacrifice. i know that doing what is right requires giving up something you want but that is just the sacrifice i have to make to fulfill my purpose. i recognize that others like my family, teachers, and even friends have sacrificed what they wanted for me to have the opportunity to have a better life. for this reason, i almost feel obligated to do the same for others which is why i want to give back to my community by building a school. part of living a life well-lived and completing my mission statement is being courageous, wise, and accepting. as dr.robin d’angelo explains, “it became clear over time that white people have extremely low thresholds for enduring any discomfort associated with challenges to our racial worldviews.”(why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism, by dr. robin d’angelo, moreau week ten). ultimately, to develop empathy one has to understand the experiences of others. in this way, one can gain more acceptance and understanding of the lives of others. i believe this is a valuable asset to have in the professional world as it can allow you to develop deeper relationships. wisdom is another valuable trait i hope to develop in hopes of achieving a life well-lived. in my view, wisdom comes from understanding multiple perspectives and viewpoints. this is why many news sources today are super dangerous. this is summarized in the podcast stating “we treat politics as entertainment, following the latest updates like we follow our favorite sports teams. instead, he says, we should think of politics as a way to acquire power and persuade our neighbors to back the issues we support..”(passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media, moreau week 11). finally, being courageous and taking risks is probably the most important aspect of living a fulfilling life and accomplishing my goals. as dean g. marcus cole explains, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (i am george floyd. except. i can breathe by dean g. marcus cole, moreau week 12). this was the most valuable lesson for me over the past 3 years as it influenced my entire perspective on my education. the dean’s words are the exact reason i believe a complete education is so valuable as it puts you in the position to change the world with the knowledge you acquire. whether you do it or not however is completely up to you and if you are willing to be courageous. it is through courage, knowledge, and a desire to inspire change that i can fulfill my mission statement over the next decades of my life. with the principles i have learned and will develop as i continue my journey of self-discovery, i hope to inspire, provide and create just as those did before me. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ moreau first year experience 3/2/22 a life well-lived for his entire life, john made the most out of every day. he made it a point to put others before himself and do what he could to help them. for him, becoming rich and famous was never the goal, just a result. it was never his intention to become a celebrity for his philanthropic actions or for his generosity. in his final days, he made sure to give his fortune to the world in the form of investments in different forms of renewable energy and charities. one of the most admirable things about john was his ability to prioritize his life around his friends and family. he took the time to relax and ensure that he was focusing on the right things at that moment. he used to quote, “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest — who most need to give themselves a break.” (why we need to slow down our lives moreau week 1). he thought this quote conveyed that the world is moving faster than we can keep up, and it’s almost too much to handle. almost every single person is stressed by something in their life, and a key solution could be to take a break and reevaluate. when he was struggling in life, john would often turn to his mother for good advice or some constructive criticism (his mother moreau week 5). nobody loved him more than his mother, and nobody would be as honest as she would either. he was able to improve on his weaknesses and take advantage of his strengths. before high school, john’s mother told him that he put too much pressure on himself and that it would only do more harm than good. this helped shape his perception of his life and the priorities that would lay ahead. he decided to focus more on his well-being than anything else, while still putting his full effort into his academics. he knew that he had to give it his all, but also realized that no academic honor is worth the price of his mental well-being. he thrived in college, with a rigid routine of waking up early and doing work until late at night, trying his best to keep up with the workload. john also gave his thanks to the meruelo family center for career development for helping him to determine his path in life. from a jumbled mess, this place helped make his future plans much easier to follow. much of john’s success in life can be attributed to the meruelo family center for career development due to his struggles throughout high school and college as for what to do with his life. ultimately, he chose not to become a doctor or an engineer as he had thought, but a full-time philanthropist, giving back to the world for what the world gave to him. john also made sure to focus on the present. the past was in the past and the future is in the future. he believed that the most important thing that you can do is live in the moment and enjoy your time while you still have it. he often recounted the words of saint benedict, “keep death daily before your eyes” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die moreau week 3). by reminding yourself of the inevitability of death each day, he believed that you will reach a greater appreciation for the moments you experience. it was during his time in college that he began to realize how fast time moves. by living in the moment and focusing on the present, it helped him maneuver through his life decisions no matter how hard those decisions were. college was filled with reflection and self-evaluation. he pondered and pondered the questions about himself without answers. after struggling for so long, someone advised him that, “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future.” john thought this was interesting because it involved something that he’d never really considered when talking about self-reflection. self-reflection is often regarded as a very important thing that people can do for themselves and has many positive benefits. he had never realized that self-reflecting can have the opposite effect if not done properly, and it must be done in a less intense way. (the right way to be introspective moreau week 6) despite having a modest living, john remained humble and kept to his core values. he valued passion, commitment, and honesty throughout his life and stuck with them until the day he died. he learned much about having core values from one of his role models, father hesburgh. father hesburgh taught him how to show determination when fighting for your beliefs and to disregard what other people think (hesburgh video moreau week 2). from charity work to rebuilding the community, john put his efforts towards those around him in order to facilitate a better environment for the generations to come. his passion flowed into his actions and his hobbies, since he loved to play sports and hold events for the local community to attend. in all his work, he continued to be honest to the highest degree and sought to be someone who people could trust in times of need. john was a family man and loved his children dearly all the way until the end. he allowed them to pursue their passions and do what they loved, which to him was most important. as a family man, john tended to let his emotions influence his judgment. one of the most important quotes to him came from the pope, “yes, tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women”. this quote conveys the appreciation of people from all different backgrounds and the significance of everybody for the improvement of the future. pope francis shared a powerful message that has pertained to the world and has withstood time. the most important part of this thinking is considering others not as “you” but collectively as “us” (why the only future worth building includes everyone moreau week 7). integration 3 tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 a life well-lived as you all may know, alexis was a very driven, hard worker. from a young age, she always strove to achieve good grades, earning academic achievement awards in elementary and middle school. in eighth grade, alexis earned a piano scholarship to her high school. eventually, she attended the university of notre dame for college. her life is truly marked by hard work. however, alexis encountered a quote by blaise pascal saying, “all the unhappiness of men arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote made alexis reflect on how she lived and what she truly wanted out of her life. reflection and living in the moment are practices that she began to integrate into her daily life. reflection allowed her to remember her core values and beliefs, not allowing worldly influences to sway her foundation. living in the moment taught alexis to be present and be where her feet were. she found that constantly thinking into the future brought about unnecessary stress and caused her to forget about opportunities she had in the present. as a part of the notre dame family, alexis felt very inspired by father theodore hesburgh. because she was not at notre dame when father hesburgh was alive, alexis found inspiration from his life story through the hesburgh film. father hesburgh was a man with strong convictions and beliefs. he did not allow having connections, affiliations, or other influences to affect his thought process behind his decision-making. father hesburgh once said, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ tran 2 “always do the right thing” (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). he did indeed live up to this statement. throughout her daily life, alexis always strived to exemplify this quote. having strong foundations built by her family and faith provided alexis with a strong moral compass. she lived by her word and values and did not allow anything to sway her from her core beliefs. of course, alexis was also a very open-minded person, always willing to learn new things. she believed that being open to new ideas and hearing different perspectives broadens one’s view of the world and society. if you knew alexis very personally, you would know she always counted and kept track of time. she was always on time for appointments, reservations, classes, or jobs and planned out much of her time. because of this planning, she was very familiar with sister aletheia’s saying that “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week three). alexis always tried to make the most of each day. especially during her time at notre dame, there were so many opportunities that she had available to her and that she wanted to take advantage of. sister aletheia’s view of life being short coincided with alexis trying to be in the present. tomorrow is not guaranteed, so alexis prioritized living in the present by starting with small things like taking time out of her day to spend more time with her friends and family. she also made it her mission to find her calling in life. alexis viewed a good life as finding her calling and integrating it into her career path. alexis spent a lot of time contemplating what she wanted to do in life. she valued a view by dr. donald super that “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). this view helped alexis to know that she needed to find https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ tran 3 a career that utilized all her talents and strengths. by doing so, she found that she would not fall victim to burnout or feel unproductive or unsatisfied with her work. alexis believed that if she ever pursued a career that did not engage all parts of her being, she would not feel whole as one part of her would be left out, unused and underdeveloped. she also thought that if everyone worked in a job where he or she were engaging all parts of his or her being, the world would be a better place as everyone would be contributing his or her own talents. alexis’ dad described her as a compassionate yet disciplined person throughout her whole life (discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week 5). alexis was always disciplined in that she was grounded in her values and knew how to set boundaries. however, she was also compassionate because she loved to connect with others. her dad told a story of when she was little and packed her suitcase all by herself. he said she knew how to pack the necessities and packed them in an organized way. alexis’ life was indeed just as how she packed that suitcase when she was younger. she knew how to prioritize items in her life and organize them in a way that made sense to her. she was organized physically and also emotionally. alexis knew how to handle her emotions and deal with influences that would affect her moral foundation. as with all lives, alexis’ life did not come without obstacles. in 2017 during her freshman year of high school, her mom was diagnosed with stage four metastatic breast cancer. alexis’ strong catholic faith helped her find meaning at this point in her family’s life. she felt connected to dr. kim’s statement that “i have experienced…many incidents where god will answer my prayers and give me strength” (5 minutes by grotto moreau fye week 6). alexis and her parents turned to their faith to give them the strength to find hope in a dark moment. she https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 tran 4 learned that life is not life without suffering. suffering, while dreadful in the moment, brings meaning to life by allowing those who experience suffering to grow. alexis began reflecting on the friendships she had in her life after encountering aristotle’s view on friendships in a philosophy course called god and the good life. she found that the three very close friends she made during her freshman year of college and herself together embodied aristotle’s view of a perfect friendship. alexis believed that this was because they “[closed] both eyes; [and saw] with the other one” (tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle moreau fye week 7). closing the two eyes that physically exist on our faces allows for people to not judge others by worldly concepts and ideals. seeing with the other eye forces people to view others as god would view others. alexis, being an only child, highly valued these three friends as she began a new chapter in her life. let us remember her as a hard worker, loyal friend, and compassionate acquaintance. tran 5 works cited barca, jerry, and christine o'malley. “hesburgh film.” panopto, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-45 49-8581-ab9500c9ecd9. graham, ruth. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” the new york times, the new york times, 14 may 2021, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html. grotto. “5 minutes.” grotto network, 10 nov. 2021, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?ut m_source=moreau&amp;utm_medium=class&amp;utm_campaign=spring_2022. iyer, pico. “why we need to slow down our lives.” ideas.ted.com, 4 nov. 2014, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-45 gus heatherman moreau integration three “death resume” angus “gus” heatherman was born on march 20th, 2003 in newnan, georgia. gus was homeschooled in his early years and attended northgate public high school later on. while growing up, gus was active in the boy scouts of america and ran cross country and track at northgate. as we all know, gus was born into a notre dame dynasty family, with both of his brothers attending the school before him. gus continued the tradition and graduated with a primary major in science business and a secondary major in english. gus never knew for sure what he wanted to do for a career, except that he wanted to be involved with helping others. it was this mindset that led gus to use his business knowledge to work for a nonprofit organization in the atlanta area. the nonprofit focused on helping feed and clothe the homeless in the city of atlanta, while also working to provide affordable housing for those with lower incomes. gus was happy to use the knowledge and experience he received from notre dame to help others, and he loved being close to home while he worked. outside of work, gus’s number one hobby was poetry writing. since he took a poetry writing class in the second semester of his freshman year, he fell in love with the activity and has a published poetry collection called “happy go snappy”. gus described his writing as a moment to have a little peace and quiet in a busy life, something that he valued greatly. gus didn’t even like poetry in high school, but it was his willingness to take a chance and explore something new that helped him find a lifelong passion. aside from poetry, gus has loved video games and following the video game industry from a young age. he also loved star wars and marvel, hiking and the outdoors, and playing the piano. gus liked to take the time out of his day to enjoy the little things that he was passionate about, which is why you could often find him transfixed if he suddenly got the inspiration for a poem, heard a song he liked come over the radio or saw a star wars trailer on tv. gus was born into a loving and tight night family. his parents always pushed him to be the best version of himself, and he credited their love and guidance as a main factor in his own happiness and success. his two brothers were his best friends growing up and continued to be throughout his life. as a family, they loved to play board games and watch georgia sporting events together. gus has been married to someone he loves, considers his best friend, and who knows how to waltz since a year after college. gus always knew he wanted a family of his own and subsequently had three kids. gus always knew how to make someone smile. sometimes he did this by making a joke to a specific person who he knew would find it funny. sometimes it was to sit and listen attentively to a friend who needed to vent. and sometimes it was love given to a stranger through the nonprofit he worked for. all of these examples show one thing in common about gus: he lived for other people. it is this selflessness that we will most remember gus by. while we will miss gus for his kindness, passion, and devotion to others, we know that he is in a better place, probably still writing poetry and playing video games. i don’t think that it’s possible to write your own eulogy and not do a little reflecting on your life. for me, writing it was like writing my own death resume, the final application that i’ll ever have to submit. like all resumes, i included my best attributes, my talents, and among other things, what makes my life (or more specifically, what will make my life) a life well-lived. a major topic that i cover in my eulogy is my love of poetry. i truly hope that it is something i keep up with my entire life. one of the reasons is best exemplified by this quote: “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). poetry is not just a hobby and activity that i hope i keep up with, it’s an escape. it’s a moment where i can be at peace, be focused, and listen to nothing but typing keyboards and my own voice in my head. like the quote says, poetry is my pause in a chaotic life, and i hope it continues to serve this function. i mentioned in my eulogy that i was a boy scout when i was younger. this is closely related to the fact that i hope to work at a nonprofit organization later in life. consider this quote about one of the domer dozen. “he was a freshman in high school when his younger sister, at only six years old, was diagnosed with a rare and life-threatening brain tumor that required surgery and left her dependent on a slew of medications to support her endocrine system. this served as his motivation to pursue a career in medicine.” (“domer dozen” by notre dame alumni association moreau fye week two). i love the fact that this person was inspired from an experience in their childhood to do something great. in this same way, i hope to follow the example of my boy scout troop leader who dedicated all of his free time to the boy scout program and helping young people strive for greatness. he truly was a selfless person who cared deeply for others, and i hope to mirror this by dedicating myself to something similar someday, which is why i chose the career i did for my eulogy. another reason i chose the nonprofit organization to work at was because of the difference between happiness and joy. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” (“three key questions” adapted from father michael himes moreau fye week three). working at the nonprofit is something that i think will lend me joy and not just happiness. the “genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” is how we find joy, and i think that rightness comes from a life of helping others. working at a nonprofit is something that i think will bring me joy because the main focus will be helping other people. the part of my eulogy where i talk about the attributes i’ll be remembered by is included here for a similar reason. “tenderness means to use our eyes to see the other, our ears to hear the other, to listen to the children, the poor, those who are afraid of the future.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). in my eulogy, i discuss one of my positive attributes: wanting, and being successful at, making others happy, my friends and strangers included. this quote was affirmation for me that this is the best way to live. like the quote says, i hope in my life that i listen to everyone i’m in contact with and try my very best to make everyone joyful. i included in my eulogy that i didn’t even like poetry in high school, which is odd since i love it so much now. a quote from an article posted by the meruelo center for career development states that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). i thought that this quote was very applicable to my experience with poetry and shows me the importance of trying new things. if i hadn’t taken a poetry class, which is something that i previously wasn’t interested in, i wouldn’t have found a potential lifelong passion. this is why throughout my life i always want to try new things and be open to all sorts of different experiences. when discussing the various things that i’m passionate about in my eulogy, i mention my passion for the “little things” in life. i decided to include this because of the conversation i had with my roommate for the discernment conversation activity of week 5. he said that “[i] value the simple things in life because they make [me] happy and because they are often taken for granted.” (“week 5 discernment conversation activity” quote from my roommate moreau fye week five). sometimes, i believe that we all need to stop and appreciate the small aspects of life that make us happy. so much of life is waiting for the next big thing and traveling to the next big event. this in-between time can be filled with so many small moments of joy and happiness if you simply give them the attention they deserve. i included this in my eulogy because this is a mindset i hope to keep throughout my entire life, one where i’m appreciative of everything life has to offer, even the smallest of moments. “ ‘why’ questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this quotation was helpful when writing the eulogy as a whole. i had to ask myself what i was going to do with my life, what my career was going to be, what attributes i value in myself. i think that why questions are somewhat appropriate because you have to ask yourself why you want certain things over others in your life. despite this, what questions are much more concrete, and i found myself asking them more frequently when writing my eulogy than the why questions. “creating a better future” is exactly what i was doing with this assignment, so i think it’s appropriate to end it with this quote. this assignment, and indeed the entire first semester of assignments, has been thought-provoking. the concept of one’s own death might be frightening at first, but you come to realize how much insight you gain by keeping it close in your mind. i hope that my real eulogy is at least somewhat similar to the one i’ve written here and i plan to keep the knowledge i’ve gained from this experience close at hand. capstone integration collins 1 capstone integration april 29, 2022 this semester of moreau focused on developing what a leader is and how reflective leadership can be a powerful force for good in the world. this semester i have learned what qualities make a leader, and how i can continue to develop my leadership skills in order to interact with different communities and be a voice for others. in the film hesburgh, father hesburgh is characterized as a powerful leader because of his ability to bring together different groups of people by serving as an intermediary and being an approachable and vulnerable figure (week 2). father hesburgh embodies what it means to be a leader who drives social change, and his contributions to the civil rights commission demonstrate how his reflective leadership resulted in change. hesburgh was introduced during week two of the course, thus serving as a backdrop during subsequent conversations about leadership, empathy, courage, and accompaniment. i hope that one day i will be an influential and inspiring leader like hesburgh, and i feel that by embodying the qualities and values that made hesburgh a memorable leader i will be able to live a fuller version of my life. i now know that in order to become the best version of myself and reach my leadership goals i must first learn how to be kind to myself and reflect on my values and the things that truly matter to me. at the beginning of the semester, i was feeling a lot of academic pressure and that no matter how hard i worked i was falling behind and failing to live up to the expectations i had for myself. if you were to look below the facade you would find that i was struggling with “toxic levels of fear, anxiety, and depression, of emptiness and aimlessness and isolation” collins 2 (deresiewicz, week 1). throughout high school and for the first semester of college i had prioritized academics over my mental and physical well-being, but this semester i decided i was going to work to change these habits, and this has put me on the path to becoming a reflective leader. in order to truly learn about myself and the person i want to be, i had to learn to be introspective. as eurich writes in her article “the right way to be introspective,” “the qualities most critical for success in today’s world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness” (eurich, week 6). i have always considered myself to be self-aware, i have written in a journal since i was in elementary school and i enjoy spending time alone and reflecting in nature. however, after reading eurich’s article i realized that self-awareness is not just simply being alone with yourself or thinking about yourself, it requires constantly challenging your views of not only yourself but also the world around you by asking yourself “what” questions. asking “what” rather than “why” keep[s] us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (eurich, week 6). with this newfound understanding of who i am and who i want to be, i feel that i am prepared to move to the next stage in my leadership journey. in “solitude and leadership” deresiewicz writes that leaders are “able to think things through for themselves… [and have] moral courage, the courage to stand up for what [they] believe” (deresiewicz, week 7). this semester i have learned that in order to be a leader i need to be confident in my ideas and dare to think for myself, rather than following everyone else or worrying about what others may think. this is easier said than done, but i feel that if i have the courage to stand up for the things that are important to me, i will encourage others to do the same, thus leading by example. standing up for what i believe in relates to my purpose at notre collins 3 dame. i have decided to major in environmental science with a minor in journalism, ethics, and democracy. i feel that this combination of science with my love of reporting and writing will make me happy and that i will be excited about my studies. by studying journalism i feel that i will be able to share topics that i am passionate about with others in the notre dame community, and journalism will give me the opportunity to develop creative ideas and pursue stories that will make a difference. journalism relates to empathy because through writing journalists are able to listen to other people’s stories and share these voices with others. through sharing stories i hope to help others gain a better understanding of other people’s situations, thus fostering empathy and kindness. i feel that studying environmental science with journalism will help me reach a fuller version of my life because i will learn how i can help others and cause meaningful change. i feel that my purpose at notre dame is to learn how to be a compassionate leader and form meaningful connections and relationships with different people. as i am pursuing my education i am also learning how empathy and kindness can allow me to accompany people, and journey with them through their challenges. louise richardson, who spoke at the 2018 notre dame graduate school commencement address said, “we must engage more systematically with the communities around us” (richardson, week 9). i feel that this quote relates to my purpose at notre dame because my goal is not only to graduate college and get an education but more importantly to learn how i can use my education to help others and how my education will shape the person i will become. at this point in my notre dame journey, i have reached “a pretty pass!” such as the one annie dillard describes in “stalking” (dillard, week 13). although i faced many challenges to reach the top of the peak i stand at now, like adjusting to college and being away from my family for the first time, i have a newfound understanding of my life as an individual and an adult as a collins 4 result of these experiences. although i may not know exactly where i stand or where i am headed, i do know that all of my life experiences up until this point have shaped the person i am today. standing at the top of this pass i look down and remember all of the experiences that have helped form my understanding of reflective leadership and how my life experiences have instilled in me a desire to work towards social change. works cited creadon, patrick, director. hesburgh. 2019. deresiewicz, william. “solitude and leadership.” 2010. deresiewicz, william. “the students.” dillard, annie. stalking, 1974. eurich, tasha, and al gore. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) |.” ted ideas, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. accessed 15 april 2022. richardson, louise. “notre dame commencement 2018: graduate school commencement speaker.” youtube, 21 may 2018, https://www.youtube.com/clip/ugkxnng2npp3byc15zjydnyqhrmweuxohfps. accessed 18 april 2022. not just a man for others, but a good one as well my time here at the university of notre dame, although short, has opened my eyes to just how wild the world is out there. when i first thought about the idea of creating a eulogy, i thought “why would i do that, i’m going to live another 60 years!” i have seen this view change some throughout my time here. especially in the last week or so, i have realized that our lives could realistically end at any moment. in my short time here, i have learned so much about myself, and about who i want to be and how i want to develop as a man. this semester in moreau class, i have found myself very enticed with the ideas of creating bonds, finding what i stand for, and what life i want to live. i have spent lots of time thinking about who i want to be, a man for others, and how i can accomplish this. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping further back and standing still that we can begin to see what the canvas really means.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) throughout my whole life, i have struggled with anxiety, and dealing with everything life has thrown at me. i often find myself getting stressed out over small things such as playing poorly in sports or thinking about things i have said or done in my past, and have mentally destroyed myself over them. it is only when i step back and take time to look at the bigger picture, that i realize that i am on the right path, and that i am most definitely capable of being great, because “nobody is perfect, but how can we set ourselves on the right path, apart from the rest?” (“hesburgh video” by jerry barce and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two). the one thing that i want most in my life is when i am on my deathbed, thinking back on everything that i have done and has happened in my life, i want to have no regrets and say to myself that i lived a meaningful life. i want to live an expansive life, and not leave any stone unturned in my life. “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall.”(“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career servicesmoreau fye week four) i have frequently found myself wondering what my education has really done for me, and what i want to do with my degree, and what it is going to offer me for opportunities. when i write the last chapter of my life, i want to be known as the man who never backed down from a challenge. i have suffered setback after setback in so many ways, from physical to mental to emotional, and i am a better man for it. i think that when the last page in my book of life is created, it will read “, a man for others, who feared nothing but god.” i have always spent my time trying to figure out what it is that truly makes me happy, and what i want to do with my life. “remember, only you can finally say, ‘this is a genuine source of joy in my life!’”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) i think that happiness is internally rooted in what we are interested in. i spend so much time wondering about if i am truly happy or not, or what it is that has made me happy in my life. i think that the idea of happiness is one that is very difficult to define by words, but rather we see it in our emotions. for me, what makes me happy is finding something that is going to drive me to become better than who i was previously. “i have never seen someone so determined to come back and be better than where you left off. you were pushing yourself beyond every limit you had from your physical status to your education, to even your mental health.” (“interview” by brad west moreau fye week five) i have sometimes considered myself to be a workaholic, and have always been on my grind, whether it is in school, sports, or even in my social life. i want to always be a better version of myself than i was when i woke up that previous morning. in my lifetime i want to find what it is that causes me joy. i think that examining my emotions and behaviors is a very valuable tool, but that i am sometimes asking the wrong things about myself, and i “tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) a life well lived is bred by the relationships you form with your loved ones. for me, i have found myself become a mold of the people who i look up to and have formed genuine relationships with. i would certainly consider myself the product of my environment, and i am proud to say that. i have been surrounded by great people throughout my life, and it has shaped me into a great man, and someone who is always there for others. “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out.” (“tattoos on the heart”, by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven) i think one thing i have certainly struggled with is letting new people into my life, but i have definitely opened my mind up more to this idea, and it has given me new meaningful relationships i don’t think i would have formed without doing this. i have grown throughout the years telling myself that i will be a man for others, and that i will be dependable and will always be a man who is there for the greater good. i know that this is easier said than done, but i can confidently say that the direction i am headed in has laid the path for me to be able to say at the end of my eulogy “i have no regrets, and i love you all.” harrington moreau 4 march 2022 integration 3 – my eulogy was a loving sister, daughter, and friend to many. she is remembered by her three younger brothers bryan-john, ian, and raphael, her older sister judith, her parents cristina and bryan, and all her friends from school. though not here tonight, she wants everyone to know how grateful she is for all of you coming and supporting not only her, but also everyone here in this tough time. lucia was the type of person to focus on others rather than herself. in fact, she didn’t enjoy talking and thinking about herself as much as helping others figure out their own situations. one quote that really impacted her was from an article outlining the right way to be introspective. it stated: “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (moreau week 6). she knew this, which is why she didn’t like to focus on herself. rather, she enjoyed helping others realize that their emotional needs and health are important. she saw it as a way she could serve the people around her, and it was one of the things she enjoyed most. lucia believed that people were supposed to work together to trek through life. though there is a lot of darkness and evil in the world, she believed that working together, people could combat it. one quote that encompassed her belief in this is as follows: “we have so much to do, and we must do it together. but how can we do that with all the evil we breathe every day?” (moreau week 7). this is a quote from pope francis, and though it brings to light the fact that there is a lot of evil in the world, it also introduces the idea that working together as a community, people can find happiness. one of lucia’s most important values was to be a support for her friends when they needed her. this is because she always felt supported by the people closest to her, and was so unbelievably grateful for these people in her life so she wanted to be that person to others. one aspect of life that lucia struggled with was living in the moment. she always liked to have a plan for her future. one could see it especially at college in the way she planned her meals with certain people for certain days so that she never had a doubt what she was doing in a certain night. she was always looking to the future, which helped her in many ways, but also hindered her in others. many people would tell her to stop and live in the moment ever once in a while, and those were the moments where she would listen and contemplate what the people were telling her to do. one instance of this that was very impactful for lucia was when she read an article in week one of moreau. a particular quote that stood out to her was: “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (moreau week 1). it hit her hard because she had never thought about staying still and contemplating where she was at a single moment of her life, not just planning for her future. one of the things lucia planned for the most (in her future) was her career. she was always worried about choosing a career path where she would be trapped doing something she didn’t necessarily enjoy. she had so many hobbies (such as music, crafts, sports, and more) and liked to move around from experience to experience. when choosing a career (pertaining to her major of mechanical engineering) lucia took the words of the muruelo family center to mind and realized that “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (moreau week 2). she enjoyed serving others, but also enjoyed problem-solving and math (or any stem-related topic for that matter). this is why she chose the career she did. she could combine multiple passions of hers into one aspect of her life while still leaving room for time with her family, friends, and loved ones. though she’s gone, lucia’s biggest values live on in everyone she loved. one of her biggest goals in life was to make the people around her feel loved, respected, valued, and happy. but she realized that there is a difference between being happy and being joyful: “what’s the difference between joy and happiness? it’s not a matter of whether this makes you happy or not because happiness is affected by many external factors (sleep, illness, hunger, loneliness, etc.). happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day” (moreau week 3). it’s for this reason that lucia tried to make sure everyone’s needs were met. though happiness “changes from moment to moment, from day to day,” lucia’s goal every day was to the reason someone was happy in that day. she saw it as a quest every time she stepped out of her room. finally, lucia always tried to stay true to her values of helping others. one quote that always stood with her was: “we travel as seekers after answers we cannot find at home, and soon find that a change of climate is easier than a change of heart” (moreau week 4). though when she first heard the quote she thought it was a negative connotation, she then came to realize it was a testament to how strong one’s willpower and values can be in the face of adversity, and it is what she would like to leave everyone with tonight. “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted. – moreau fye week 1 "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2 “three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week 3 “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4 “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau fye week 6 why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye 7 jennixa de la cruz theo helm fye moreau capstone integration 29 april 2022 my mission for life the university of notre dame is one of the top universities in the nation, so it was expected that they would want their students to excel in education. i thought that coming to this university meant that i had to just be a student and pass my classes. i thought i would have to be a machine and just work on studying more than anything else. then the university of notre dame taught me that i need to discover myself and my purpose in being in this university. being a student does not define myself as an individual but instead as a part of who i am for a short period of time. i must find who i am and the purpose of my being. i want to thrive in this community and find people that will help me through life. the university has made me think about how i want to be remembered after my death. i do not just want to be another student, but i want to make a name for myself. i have goals to be successful and earn a great living, but i should not forget that i am here for myself, my family, and the future. i should not lose myself in the process of achieving those goals. instead i will thrive to be the best person i can be and pursue life itself (“mission statement” by jennixa de la cruz moreau fye week 13). one of the inspirations and role models that i have learned about this semester was father hesburgh. he had a mission for humanity and was ahead of his time. he wanted to do many things for the university and made a name for it. he was not only interested in just the university humanity as a whole as he stood for what he believed was just and right (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). knowing that there is a possibility that one person can do so much for humanity is inspiring to many to achieve the same. i want to follow behind father hesburgh’s example and continue what he started. i want to learn from this university about what kind of leader i can be and how i can inspire others. however, trying to live a more inspirational life can have obstacles as well. father hesburgh had many obstacles and scandal, especially with the vatican. one must learn how to live around those obstacles and overcome them. to overcome obstacles in life one must be self-aware of all they do when it comes to even the simple matters in life because “all stem from self-awareness” (“ways to practice mindfulness” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i must learn how to be self-aware of my actions and emotions since that can help me grow more and learn about myself and those around me. these obstacles will not stop me from achieving my own way of living and the goals i have set for myself. the one important question that i always ask myself is what kind of life is it that i want and how can the way i live influence others? part of self-awareness or self-reflection is knowing what life i am currently living. we are living in a fast world right now and that is influenced by work and technology. people are more concerned with trying to be financially successful and trying to catch up with what is happening around the world instead of just trying to take time to focus on their own life. pico iyer talked about taking time away from technology or work and how beneficial that can be for the mind and just health in general ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). being aware of the life one lives is a way to reflect on how involved in relationships and the world i am. father greg boyle was involved in his community and developed relationships with inmates that have lost their way. father boyle helped them find the right passage of life and he knew how important the relationships he developed with these men were for both parties (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j moreau fye week seven). the importance of keeping a relationship is giving attention and interacting with them. i had a conversation with one of my best friends from back home that i have known since i was 4. we had maintained a great relationship for about fourteen almost fifteen years now. she described the person i am and how she believes i maintain a relationship. she believed that i always pay attention and listen to others (moreau fye week five). communication is something that i think is important when it comes to any kind of relationship. it is very important and can help with my personal mission to help the world and myself. to know what the world needs one must listen to those that are suffering and try to understand what they are going through. “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” ( “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this quote perfectly explains what kind of steps that i need to take so that i can look beyond trying to fix a problem that is never ending. it is best to just comfort those that need it and let them know that they have people to help them. being empathetic and compassionate is trying to take some of the suffering away from people and that is what i want to do. to help with suffering can also include the inclusion of those who are suffering. the spirit in this university is trying to have more inclusion so that people do not feel as if they are not wanted. one needs to understand that the importance of inclusivity is showing that someone is being heard, especially those who are in the minority. i myself am in the minority and this school shows great efforts of trying to help me feel welcomed in this school. learning to be aware of others' struggles will impact their lives and “it impacts my lived experience” in the way that i am more educated and aware (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). i live in a lower middle-class community back home where they treat us as criminals since we are a hispanic community. i have always tried to strive for greatness to prove those people wrong and to show them that anyone can be successful if they keep an open mind. there were times where i thought i was going to fail but then i learned that the only way i fail is keeping the same mindset throughout my life. i have gained the knowledge to educate others that there should not just be one view on matters. i would like to “leverage [them] to move them in my direction” so that they can step away from this one mindset (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brian media moreau fye week 11). my mission in life is just to live as well as possible. i will have an open mind to any challenges that i face and will not dismiss anyone who wishes to communicate with me. i want to lead an example for future generations and inspire them to continue living their life the way they see fit. there really is not a personal mission except to see where life take me and trust god on the path that he has given me. integration three matthew dipaolo 3/3/2022 prof. taylor moreau fye integration three living the good life instead of focusing on how he died, i feel like we should focus on how matthew warren dipaolo lived. a native of los angeles, he decided that he wanted to move out of la for college and followed in his father’s footsteps to attend the university of notre dame. i met him while at notre dame, because our dorm buildings were neighbors. his energy stayed the same of all the years of knowing him. throughout his life, he decided that instead of focusing on the future, to live in the moment. he would always calm down his friends, reassuring them that no matter what they were worried about, it did not matter as much as they thought it would. although he was always active on social media and liked to connect with others to keep them updated, when with friends, he always tried to make sure that no one was on their phone and to stay present in the time. “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) i found this quote and decided that it perfectly described his philosophy in life. another fun story about matthew is that he was not scared of anything, and would instead channel that energy into excitement. he would typically always volunteer https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144072 first for labs, new amusement park rides, new restaurants, and almost anything else you could think of. “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) knowing that eventually one day he would leave this earth as he so sadly did, he made sure that instead of getting down about the small things, he could live his life to the fullest regardless of what others thought. although matthew may have passed recently, he was still a survivor in many ways. along with being survived by his husband and kids, he is a survivor of mental health issues. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (text: “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) unfortunately he was a perfect exemplar of this quote. surviving a shooting at only nine years old, he developed a very negative view of the world early on. this affected him throughout his life ranging through different mental illnesses. growing up in a catholic environment in school and at home, he stayed practicing until his death using it as his escape. however, since he was gay, this escape did not always want him. going through 16 years of catholic schooling taught him that being himself was wrong and to repress and forget those feelings. how could something he loved so much be so cruel to him? instead of leading a fight against the church, everytime he received hate it made him grow into a stronger person. he used these struggles to grow closer to others, being an advocate for equality. using his education as an american studies and gender studies major, he decided to use this education to fight for others in the court of law. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144118 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144118 my favorite story about matthew was when we would go out together because he was always willing to do anything and everything. from football game day tailgates to late night parties in the dead of winter. i still remember the days of running from west quad all the way to north quad in 10 degrees and a blizzard just so we could dance and be the most fun people everywhere we went. spontaneous outings to random restaurants and running from zumba class to a show across campus, he always wanted to experience it all. as i bring this speech to a close we have to remember to remember how to live instead of worrying about how we die. “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another ‘you,’ and another ‘you,’ and it turns into an ‘us.’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7) i believe that matthew can be that you, and the rest of us celebrating him here today can become the us. his life’s work was to make everyone feel a sense of belonging and for everyone to become united with each other in a world of one. let us live this out for him as he rests in peace. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144132 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/144132 the eulogy of on a life well lived if there was one thing would say to anyone about how to lead a life well lived, he would tell them to strive to be remembered. he believed the most important thing was leaving a lasting legacy on those around him and positively impacting all the lives he could. his favorite poem was “o me! o life”! by walt whitman in which these words are shared: “...the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” life keeps moving forward and stops for no man. the important thing is you leave your verse or your mark before it is too late. john believed there were many ways in which someone could leave a legacy. not everyone has to cure cancer or win a nobel prize because frankly that's just impossible. however, he believed everyone could make their mark in their own unique way, and this was not more or less significant than anyone else’s. one of the first ways is to help those around you and make the world a better place. fr. hesburgh once said, while responding to a student who was upset about the state the country was in, “then do something about it, it's your country, it's your problem” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). john shared a similar belief system to this. he always said if you are not satisfied with the way things are, then be the change you want to see. there is no better way to leave your legacy than by helping those around you and making the lives of others better. another quote john really enjoyed came from pope francis who said, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). john agreed that there was no excuse to not do right by your fellow man and that one of the most important aspects of life was cultivating relationships with those around. what better way to leave a positive impact than to cherish the loved ones around you and be loved back by then. he knew that if he established meaningful connections with the people in his life than he would be remembered long after he passed, and the legacy he hoped for would be achieved. another factor john thought was essential to living a well lived life was finding your passion and making sure you pursue it. some advice which john lived by was given to him by his father, who would tell him to not worry or be concerned about how much money you’re going to make when considering career options. instead, he would urge him to find something which challenged him, something he enjoyed, and something that motivated him to get out of bed in the morning. if you found these things, then the money will most likely follow (moreau fye week 5). while it is important to find a career which you are passionate about, john also made sure to always find the balance necessary between work and the other aspects of his life. he knew it was important to spend time with his family and friends, pursue hobbies, and cultivate the mind through the arts. a quote which he used to find balance came from pico iyer who said in a ted article, ““the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). like iyer said, john knew the importance of spending time away from your work as well and to not to become too consumed with your job. if you do not take time away from your work and find a good balance then you will not be able to pursue other facets of your life and leave an impacting legacy on those around you. in addition, john would always preach that no matter the hardships we endure, you always need to keep moving forward. he would tell a story about a friend of his who had a tattoo of a cartoon duck on his thigh, positioned where no one could see. the reason behind the tattoo is whenever the friend felt overwhelmed or stressed out, he would look down at his leg and be reminded to not take life too seriously. john knew it was important to accept our mistakes and not to become too consumed with them. john enjoyed a quote from fr. michael himes which said, “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us.” it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). john understood the meaning of this quote to those around him, that it is important that we fail in life and we used this failure to motivate us to continue growing and moving forward. likewise, he also enjoyed a quote from the meruelo family for career development that said, “as much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order” ("navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). a message from this quote that john would want to share is that it is important to realize that life does not always work out the way we planned, and this is okay. we must take the crooked with the straights and keep adapting to the changes life throws at us. if we are able to do this and continue to move forward with our lives, then we are truly on the path to a life well lived. lastly, john knew that in order to fully enjoy and benefit from the gift that is life, you must take a moment to enjoy what is around you. one of his favorite movies, ferris bueller’s day off, said, “life moves pretty fast. if you don’t stop around and look once in a while, you could miss it.” he knew it was essential to take a break from all the commotion in your life and truly enjoy the moment you are in. a similar quote he appreciated came from a grotto story by aria swarr which a man who was paralyzed said, “i began just thanking god and being more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). john would want everyone to know that setbacks will occur, and in these moments we must take a second and enjoy the positives in life and be thankful for what we do have. we cannot resent what goes wrong, but rather we must move through them and keep a positive outlook. the words jon would want to leave you all with come from kanye west. kanye once said, “people always tell you, 'be humble. be humble.' when was the last time someone told you to be amazing? to be great!” john urges everyone to go and be great and to go and leave a lasting legacy just as he did. capstone integration moreau first-year experience how to live a life my mission is to live my life following the values i hold dearest, such as humility, dedication, and a quest for knowledge. as an agnostic one of my distinct goals is to explore all religious traditions and pull from the common values that can be applied to my own life. to do this i believe that it is essential to accept everyone as equal human beings and accept the fact that everyone’s experience has value, while also supporting those in need of help. my mission is to do what i love, committing 100% to whatever it is, and doing it to the best of my ability. i make it my mission to embrace the power of opportunity, refusing to pass up every situation that presents a unique opportunity and constantly challenging myself. i believe that to live my life the way i want to, ultimately i need to be truly honest with myself and reflect on what i have done and what i want to do in the future with an open mind. to live by the values i hold dearest, i want to continue to be true to myself and part of that is being consistent with what i do well. i had a conversation with my that dad pointed out to me that i had an off-brand form of resilience, an unwillingness to give up despite my being hard on myself for failure (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5). this is something i need to continue to do as my classes and major get more difficult in order to stay true to myself. humility is also a huge part of this part of my mission. i believe that the pope was correct in saying: "power is like drinking gin on an empty stomach." you feel dizzy, you get drunk, you lose your balance, and you will end up hurting yourself and those around you if you don’t connect your power with humility and tenderness. (why the future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i think to maintain my friendships and relationships with those around me at notre dame, i need to act humbly and be able to admit when i am wrong. to fulfill my commitment to a quest for knowledge i also have to look for wisdom, looking to understand multiple perspectives instead of just responding to one i disagree with. “instead of hating the other side, instead of hating a random person who says they're republican or says they're democrat, they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction?” (passion isn’t enough, hidden brain podcast moreau fye week 11). this quote from the hidden brian podcast encapsulates the way i want to think about most issues or disagreements, and how i will wisely acquire knowledge. i want to convince people in group projects of my point of view and be open-minded for them to convince me, as i have been trying to do in all my group projects. while these values may be important, they mean nothing if i do not accept everyone as equal human beings with valuable experiences. this view on segregation within schools is a great example: “the whiter our schools and neighborhoods are, the more likely they are to be seen as “good.” the implicit message is that there is no inherent value in the presence or perspectives of people of color.” (why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism, dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). i believe this point of view is not only misguided but moronic. i think that the diverse community at notre dame shows that we need to accept people of all backgrounds as equals with valued experiences. i refuse to treat people as though they are nothing. “as an african-american man, i have had the experience of being pulled over by a police officer, with no apparent or expressed reason for the stop.” ('i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something, by dean marcus cole moreau fye week 12). having experienced racial discrimination to a much smaller extent, i know the value of accompanying people when they are suffering and make it my mission to continue to do so. “they accompanied me – especially the kids – as they taught me spanish, and as they helped me understand the complexities of their lives and the possibilities for finding some paths forward, which we began to work on together. ” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i have a friend who suffers from some pretty heavy mental health issues, but we just sit and talk about football or basketball, and together that helps us both. this experience has made me realize why it is an important part of my mission to accept everyone as equal human beings and accompany those in times of suffering. i want to commit to whatever i do and do it to the best of my ability, be it college classes, work, or spending time with my family. i have always believed that if you are doing something you love it stops feeling like work: “it’s really hard to motivate yourself to do well if you’re just not interested in that subject matter or activity, or maybe your skill is lacking so it gets frustrating quickly.” (navigating your career journey by notre dame career development moreau fye week 4). i find it easier to commit 100% of my time and effort to classes in computer science right now for this very reason as i feel as though i am doing something that interests me. my mission is to continue to live this way and not put in less effort than necessary for things that i love. i believe that at notre dame, there is always an opportunity to explore something you are interested in and that to live my mission i need to take advantage of this fact. just because one door closes doesn’t mean there are still a bunch of ones still not open. when challenged with adversity i just feel like it’s important to be resilient and take advantage of every opportunity presented to you, even if it’s not the one you were necessarily expecting. (2021 domer dozen honoree: michael hillmer ’17 moreau fye week 2). there is no opportunity that is without its challenges but to be aware of the opportunities available to me and be brave enough to take them will mean that i am living my mission during my time at notre dame. the final part of my mission is something that i feel is more personal to me rather than to those around me, reflection. to me reflection means introspecting in the correct way: “buddhist scholar tarthang tulku uses an apt analogy: when we introspect, our response is similar to a hungry cat watching mice. we eagerly pounce on whatever “insights” we find without questioning their validity or value.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6 ). after a physics exam in which i did badly, i found myself lacking motivation and blaming myself for the bad score rather than looking to see how i could improve. i had to learn how to reflect for it to be beneficial to myself and be honest with where i was concerning my level of physics. another aspect of reflection i commit myself to is to take a pause. at notre dame especially, the workload is intense, classes are hard and the pace seems to accelerate every week. sometimes a pause helps to put things into perspective: “that’s the reason american football players prefer to go into a huddle rather than just race toward the line of scrimmage.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i feel like pausing and taking a step back also helps us see what the photo is beginning to look like in the jigsaw that is our lives. “remember your death.” the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future. it can seem radical in an era in which death — until very recently — has become easy to ignore. (nytmeet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i believe that sometimes we find ourselves busy and engrossed in what we are doing and we sometimes fail to see the bigger picture. i want to be able to be honest with myself by looking at my mortality and not hanging on to relationships or time spent pursuing something that didn’t work. in order to live my mission statement, i need to be cognizant of the way i am living my life. i need to actively take steps in order to follow these rules i have laid out for myself, which granted will not be easy. i am also aware that at my age these values are not completely fixed, instead, i look at them as a solid foundation for the person i want to become. still, i want to remain open to the idea that my personal mission statement could develop with time and not be so rigid in the way i am living that i cannot adapt to these changes. integration #3 dr. chan moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the struggle karina eme martinez savidge. a daughter, sister, wife, mother, grandmother, and friend. she hated being late. she loved taking an excessive amount of pictures. she only drank coffee when she was tired. she was one of the only people who would call her family every other day while in college. it is small facts like these ones that define a personwhat they do when no one is looking, when there is no one there to judge, when it is just you. karina was one of the most loyal, loving, selfless, and hardest working people that i have ever met. throughout her successful career in the army and as a civilian, she told me that the greatest misconception about work is that “..if i take time off, i somehow believe, i’ll be that much more hurried the rest of the time.” (why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer, moreau fye week one). “(karina) used her degrees and education to make an impact in the world and in people’s lives.” (notre dame domer dozen, notre dame, moreau fye week two). however, even more than her degrees, she used her heart. an education can only get you so far. compassion, love, understanding, and patience take you farther in life and are harder to learn than any chemical reaction, mathematical equation, or memorized poem. they take more practice, more dedication. modern society’s values are skewed and twistedbitterness, grudges, and deception. however, karina showed me that one of the greatest lies that the world sells is insincerity. so much pain and hurt is caused by fakeness. karina would be honest with you no matter what and did not care what others thought of her beliefs, values, ideas, or desires. she knew what she wantedto https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ become the person that god created her to be and to love so much it hurts. she was one of the most dedicated persons to her loved ones. no matter what they had done, she defended them to anybody and everybody. it is through these small acts defending your loved ones and championing sincerity that karina made an impact in the world and on me. when i asked her what she thinks the world should value, “ she answered “honesty, loyalty, selflessness, etc”. i realized then that these values in individual people are much more important than worldly values.” (conversation activity with my mom, moreau week five). karina taught me that nothing, absolutely nothing is “... a one-step process.” (navigating your career journey, meruelo center for career development, moreau fye week four). friendships, learning, growth, failure, and love are all things that don’t happen overnight. instead, these are things that must happen over and over again in order to come to fruition. she told me that one of her greatest (and silliest) fears when she was younger was asking for help. karina hated admitting that she didn’t know what to do, what she got wrong, or what to do next. she tied together her self-value with her knowledge. through the help of her friends, her family, her failures, and the death of her pride, karina finally realized that receiving help is a good thing, even when you don’t think you need it. it was thenwhen she finally turned away from her pride and turned outward to others for helpthat “....(she) began thanking god and being more positive about the things that (she) had already, (she) was able to do things more gladly.” (5 minutes, grotto network, moreau fye week 6). raised as a catholic throughout her childhood and into college, karina loved her faith and shared it with her family and friends. she attended mass every sunday and participated in the sacraments. however, when it was time for her to attend the university of notre dame, this would be the first time that she would have to attend mass by herselfwithout her family there to https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 keep her accountable. she attended mass weekly at the basilica, but had a hard time deepening her faith. she was much busier at university than she was in high school, at home with her family. one of the biggest reasons why i admire, love, and aspire to be like karina is because she never gives upthis applies to this anecdote. she told me the story about how her faith developed while she was at notre dame. at first, it was “easy” and familiar. she would go to mass and confession, the works. however, as the semester built up, she had a harder time praying, going to confession, and reflecting. making time out of her day to dedicate to god was never this hard before, she said. “in high school, the workload was manageable and i was surrounded by my family who were constant reminders and helpers to dedicate time in prayer and reflection. however, these factors were gone. because of this, i had a hard time with my faith the first semester in college.” she continued to tell me that god must have known that she was having a hard time, and her best friend was a new catholic and helped her to rededicate herself to the church. they were able to talk about everythingfaith, homework, failures, even death. her friend, grace, was able to help her realize her own death, “...as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die, ruth grahm, moreau fye week three). has taught me many thingshow to ask for help, how to be unafraid to make genuine connections with others, and how to deepen my faith in christ. because of her, i know that friendships, love, faith, and hope are not easy at all. they are the hardest things in life, but they are the ones that are worth all the work. thank you karina for struggling, for failing, for fearing, for crying, but most importantly, for never giving up. i know i speak for all present that you are missed, loved, and always remembered. “our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html infinite love. we’ve wandered into god’s own ‘jurisdiction’.” (tattoos on the heart, fr. greg boyle, s.j., moreau fye week 7). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007/download?download_frd=1 4-25-22 moreau capstone integration to know the world my personal mission statement in the search for a life well lived throughout life is to understand as much as possible about people and how they live. to “understand” to me means that i know why they do things they do, think things they think, and like things they like. i do not simply want to know the facts of people’s lives, i want to know where they draw meaning from and how they decide that. by not only knowing but understanding how people in many different situations think i will be able to develop my own beliefs in a fully formed sense. the first step to understanding things and people is to understand yourself. with the incredibly busy life that i live as a student at a very competitive university, i do not often have time to just think about myself and my own beliefs. before i can even begin to comprehend how others live, i must understand fully why i do what i do and why i think like i think. in week one we read an article that said, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). this quote really sits with me because i feel like i would feel much better about how i make decisions if i took more time to think about why i truly make them. with my decision to find myself i will hopefully find the questions that i must be asking myself in order to live a life well lived. the first will be to find what actually constitutes a good life. through my mission of understanding people i hope to find their sources for joy in order to see if they work for me. i have often thought of my life in terms of overall levels of net happiness. the more happiness i feel, the better my life is. this however was changed when i read, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week two). it is very important to me that i find a deeper happiness in deep joy. i want to find a cause for myself that will keep me occupied and fulfilled throughout my life and not just entertain me from moment to moment with happiness. on my path to achieving a life well lived i will of course face many obstacles and have to rely on people for help. family for me is the place where i always turn first which is why week five was such a good experience for me. i decided to call my dad to talk to him about what advice he had for me and that really helped. the main thing that stuck out to me was that he said that i always had trouble applying myself to extend past expectations. i have always been one to achieve at a high level, but the effort that it takes to excel was always something that i struggled with putting in. this is something that i of course have always known about myself and have been told before, but as i am growing older i have found that i do have to push myself further to truly excel and work towards that goal every day. in this pursuit of joy and the challenge of obstacles i will have to use my time of self reflection well in order to get past them. this begs the question of how to use that time well. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.”(“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this quote really puts into words how you have to be very deliberate in the way that you spend your time if you truly want to live a fulfilling and good life. i can not just do things to do them in my pursuit, everything must be intentional and deliberate. finally i must learn how to respond to suffering: both my own and others’. suffering is inevitable in life and as a great man once said, “it’s not about how hard you get hit, it’s about how hard you can get hit and get back up.” when dealing with suffering i want to have the same unrelenting and shameless attitude toward fixing it as steve refenberg who said, “i exuded an earnestness that was enormously well-intentioned; in retrospect, embarrassingly so.”(“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this sort of excitement for the cause that he is working on is honestly incredible. it is so impressive that he was able to just shamelessly follow his cause and do whatever it took to accomplish it. this is the kind of attitude that i want to have towards changing the world for the better. throughout my life, and on my journey towards a good life, if i put together all of these aspects i believe that my chances of success are very high. with time set aside for myself, an understanding of how to use that time, my family around me to support me, and a shameless devotion to making the world a better place i will be set up well for living a good life. throughout moreau this semester i have had the privilege to read about and discuss many of the topics that will be genuinely important to making my life worthwhile and deeply meaningful. while sometimes it did not feel like the applicable topics in terms of career success, looking back on the semester i have actually been prompted a lot to think about these issues and really contemplate my views. moreau final integration “in search for sunshine” my first year of college is over, and i simply don’t know how i’m supposed to move on from this point. yes, i will be back in the fall again but it feels like things will be different then. i might be acting just a tiny bit dramatic but i don’t know what lies ahead in the future and that can sometimes be scary. this is why i appreciated our last moreau assignment being to write our mission statement. “my mission in life is mainly to be happy, and to live as a child of god” (mission statement activity by moreau fye week 13). to be happy includes putting myself first when i need to, just like my brother reminded me “deje tiempo para usted” (conversation with my brother, emiliano vaqueromoreau fye week 5), roughly translating to “leave time for yourself”. this semester i haven’t done a great job at following this, with a lot of work to do and making sure i enjoyed my friends, my sleep got cut short most of the time. now, at the end of the semester, i’m realizing that i’m truly exhausted and the break will be very much appreciated. next year, i’ll try to incorporate a lay sabbath into my week, a day or a couple of hours when i can truly rest from working or hanging out and just enjoy my own company. as the moreau reading said, “it’s like a retreat house that ensures we’ll have something bright and purposeful to carry back into the other six days.” (why we need to slow down our lives, by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). the second part of my mission statement involves more action, it stands for me reacting to injustices around the world and myself, treating everyone with kindness, and trying to be a witness to the grace of god. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed” (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' by marcus colemoreau fye week 12). part of the solution is in being informed and recognizing others’ struggles that you may not encounter personally. “we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (how to avoid an eco chamber by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11), this will allow us to understand others and engage in conversation more easily. i hope to be able to make an impact in the world, not necessarily by leading a groundbreaking project but by being fair and promoting healthy and welcoming environments wherever i am. others will be able to see my mission lived out, hopefully by how i act. i admire how some people are just able to bring certain people together, they’re the glue of the group, gather people from different backgrounds, and have a great time. i want to be like this, creating new jurisdictions and breaking social barriers of who should be friends and who shouldn’t. “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jbch_x5132o https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” (chapter 8: jurisdiction on tattoos on the heart, by gregory boylemoreau fye week 7). tied with this, i also want to be able to create true friendships with people that are very different from me and not just in superficial aspects like race or background, but also in terms of personality, interests, and life perspectives. this year i’ve enjoyed listening to different opinions and learning how people form them. i believe the next step is to go beyond just listening and establishing friendships because “differences can coexist with friendship and even love” (hesburgh, directed by jerry barca; christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). during my time here, i’ve learned a lot about what it means to be a good friend, mainly because i spend so much time with mine. while i wish i could say that i haven’t had any issues with them, that would be far from the truth. however, i find comfort in knowing that real friends will try to make things right even when i mess up, they will look for reasons to stay and make it work. they have been especially helpful in the exercise of accompaniment. “it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together, by steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9). during one of the weeks, i came across this fact “in fact, the whiter our schools and neighborhoods are, the more likely they are to be seen as ‘good’ ” (why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism, by robin diangelomoreau fye week 10). this made me realize how many of the people around me often went to these whiter schools. at first, it made me feel out of place but everyone i’ve met hasn’t cared that i came from a not well-funded school with a large black and hispanic population. they see me for who i am at my core and appreciate my background and culture. because of this, i can say that i’ve felt accompanied in my time at notre dame. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not! we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (navigating your career journey, by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). looking back to the start of freshman year, i can see how certain experiences have shaped me and my time here at notre dame. an interaction that led to a job at carole sandner hall, playing games that led to friendship, struggling in a class that led to good memories, and a support system. i hope to remember this always along with my mission because things won’t always be as effortless. when things get tough i hope to remember that “life isn’t just about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives, always there, it is about how to respond to suffering from god.” (5 minutes: a grotto short film, by dr. jihoon kimmoreau fye week 6). suffering can be especially hard if we see no purpose in it but “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die , by ruth grahamweek 3). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146760 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html integration 3 moreau fye march 4, 2022 steps toward a life well-lived we are all here today to mourn the loss of a great man, . charlie was loved by many and will be truly missed. i think we all can learn a lesson from charlie’s life. charlie led a great example of living a life well-lived. i am going to take this eulogy to give the key steps of how he lived a life well-lived. one of the first things we must take into consideration while figuring out our future is to figure out what brings us joy. figuring out what brings you joy leads to a life full of happiness. i believe that a life full of happiness is the key to living a life well-lived. this seems like it is an easy task, just finding what brings you joy, but this can be difficult. many times, what is supposed to bring you joy, does not. this is when you truly need to search deep down within yourself. the definition of joy is “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life”. this means to feel like your life is for you, you must surround yourself with things that give you joy. many times, we will find ourselves feeling miserable and unsatisfied. this is okay. this feeling will allow us to feel the real joy we get out of things we enjoy. st. augustine explains this by saying, “dissatisfaction is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us. it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!”(meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die,qqc 3, st. augustine). figuring out what gives us joy is an important step in living a life well-lived. once we figure out what brings us joy, we must decide the ways we will be able to do these things. many times, while we figure out what we want to do, we do not always incorporate what gives us joy. we like to think of what others will https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html think of us and how lucrative the career will be. to live a life well-lived, we must be true to ourselves. while figuring this out we should use questions like, “what is something you are doing when you lose track of time?” and “what is something you are doing when you lose track of time?” (exploring a life well lived, center for career development, qqc 4). these questions will help guide us to what we truly should be doing and helped guide charlie throughout his life. many times, making these important decisions can be challenging alone. therefore, it can be very important to ask people you respect and trust for advice. many times, the people that know you well know you better than yourself. charlie talked to his ra for advice in selecting a major. this decision seemed daunting to him at first, but after talking to someone he respected and trusted, he learned that it was not that big of a deal. his ra said it was “very easy to switch majors” and that he himself “switched his major 3 times” (rogba ayoola, qqc 5). this can relate to many decisions in our lives. nothing is as big as it seems. we tend to worry too much and stress over nothing. these worries and self-doubt can be challenging obstacles to overcome. self-doubt is a dark shadow that can loom over you in any situation you might find yourself in. questions like, am “i cool enough?” or “smart enough?” can interfere with your plans and make you shy away from different opportunities. this can be difficult, but we must overcome these worries. in the video by grotto (5 minutes, grotto, qqc 6), dr. kim explains his story of becoming paralyzed. this leads to lots of self-doubts, especially regarding his dream career of being a sushi chef. in the end, dr. kim was able to become the chef, not like he dreamed, but he did it. we can learn from dr. kim that overcoming self-doubt can be done. along with self-doubt, we also encounter many more obstacles on our path to the good life. life as a student for charlie was especially busy. it can be a major obstacle managing all https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146544 your obligations. we come to school with the purpose to learn, but lots of that learning happens outside the classroom. it can be very hard to manage your time when it seems like you have none. although it sometimes feels impossible, we must take breaks. “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be”(why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer, ted qqc 1). this quote is explaining how you can burn out with work. he is claiming that balance work and leisure will allow your work to be even better. this relates to our growth at school because it is very easy to burn out if you do not give yourself a break. the final step to living a life well-lived is being able to make genuine relationships. it is very easy to acknowledge that, yes, we do need to form meaningful relationships, but what can be tricky is dictating what makes a meaningful relationship. life can be very difficult at times, and even more difficult if you are doing it alone. people can have unnecessary animosity toward each other, but you never know when or where you will meet someone that you may get along well with. “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone”(why the only future worth building includes everyone, pope francis, qqc 7). this is saying that we do not have to go through the struggle alone. part of a life-well lived is getting through the lows and celebrating the highs. these both are easier with someone by your side. these people also can be your inspiration. everyone has their own things that inspire them. like father hesburgh was inspired by his faith (hesburgh, qqc 2), charlie was inspired by the people he cared about. i hope you all today now have a stronger grasp on how you too can live a life well-lived. you can see that charlie, like everyone, struggled throughout his life. he did this with physical struggles and social struggles. but he was able to overcome these obstacles. he was also able to https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146498 figure out what he loved and was able to make that a part of his life. he did not do it alone though. he was able to make meaningful relationships along the way. these are some of the key steps leading to charlie living a life well-lived. moreau fye maria finan 04/29/2022 chasing the good life personally, i believe that it is my obligation as a notre dame student to always act with good-natured intent within my capabilities while still allowing myself time to pursue my own social, creative and professional interests. guided by my catholic faith, i will continually seek to honor the idea that a life unexamined is not a life worth living. the fact that we are born into this world truly knowing nothing is a virtue since it allows us free will and the chance to validate and establish our own beliefs. i aim to continually promulgate constant change and scholarship and force my beliefs and academic pursuits to continually evolve and move ever closer to creating a future where i can have a genuine impact on both myself and my community, while also allowing myself the proper time and outlets to nurture my mind and soul. that is my definition of a life well-lived. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). at a campus like notre dame, it is quite easy to get lost in the big picture; surrounded by the most extra over-achievers and a campus that constantly pressures you to be a huge force for good in the world, the pressure to learn, achieve and create impact for others around you is massive. while honorable and something that i fully intend to pursue through my studies of economics and statistics, i must also acknowledge the fact that i am beyond blessed to be able to live this life that i am experiencing. not many get this opportunity, to attend such an elite and privileged university in which academia and service are mutually tied to each other in all aspects of its education. knowing how to be a force for good is a difficult question though, and one which i’ve given much thought to by asking myself “what dream jobs truly attract you?” (meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). my dream job is not quite known yet, but i do know that i intend to go into the finance field. it may be a seemingly cold and money-hungry field, but i also fully intend to give back to both my community and future scholars through philanthropy and education. whatever salary i make while in the investment banking field, i plan to donate at least 30% of to charitable causes, and after 10-15 years in the field, i plan to pursue a career in education, as a professor, teaching the next generation once my prime has ended. it is my goal in the future to make “students feel empowered to create change in their communities using the skills, knowledge, and confidence gained through their [studies]” (domer dozen moreau fye experience week 2). i align with this mission right now personally as a student and will seek to push the limits of how much i can truly learn and challenge myself to create vehicles for change within myself within these next 3 years on campus so that i do eventually end up giving back to my community in the ways i intend to. these are lofty goals, however, and the fear of failure to do so constantly plagues me, which though at times motivates me, also often paralyzes me. thus, i turn to another one of the university’s pillars, which is “[e]ncouraging a way of living consonant with a christian [mindset].” (the university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week 13). how can one balance and employ the idea of “slowing down” in their lives consistently on a campus-wide level at notre dame, a community, that while progressive and service-based to the students, fosters high academic pressures and stresses to constantly perform and succeed? i thus turn to my faith in order to keep me grounded and focused on my mission to achieve and succeed by allowing myself time to rest by exploring pursuits that go beyond my professional and academic interests. ’keeping the sabbath — doing nothing for a while — is one of the hardest things in life for me” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i found this quote very relatable, as i too suffer from this constant fixation on being productive or having a sense of doing. in one sense, the fact that anxiety washes over me whenever i’m not doing anything is helpful since it will often force me into being productive, but i need to do better with creating an off switch for it in order to allow myself to be comfortable with taking breaks from always having my mind occupied by something else. whether that’s allowing time to my interest in the several cultural clubs on campus such as faso or bfayo, or simply joining my dorm’s interhall team, i need to feel more comfortable in allowing myself to engage with my community in a way that is not only academic. i have already greatly struggled with this, and my mental health has suffered; i have dealt with issues of self-harm and suicidal thoughts before due to this fear of healthily wavering from my mission at times. due to this inner conflict, i have asked myself over and over, “how can i mobilize my own suffering into a vehicle that creates positive change and support for others?” (qqc week 6 moreau fye week 6). it is because i have survived and overcame my own suffering that i believe that “suffering and death are facts of life: ‘everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull.’” (sister theresa aletheia noble moreau fye week 3); i know i will suffer, and i know that i will one day die, but before that day comes, i know that it will not be by my hands and that i will accomplish the things i want to do before i die. i will thus do everything in my power it takes to succeed, which includes taking care of myself. while doing the discernment conversational activity with my sister, she told me, “i know that you really value independence and setting yourself to a high standard, always seeking to do the best you can do, but sometimes what you end up seeking is perfection, and always aspiring to that high mark tends to put you in positions of isolation and suffering. it’s ok to rely on others and to communicate when you need help or when you need to come back down to earth because if you want to.” (qqc flor radilla moreau fye week 5). relying on others for support will nurture both my mind and soul, and will allow me to move past the chains of nearsightedness that suffering has caused for me in the past by giving me hope for a better tomorrow. ultimately, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that doesn't dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow” (his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). that better tomorrow though, cannot be realized by simply improving one’s own life, but rather can only truly materialize by also “looking beyond your immediate concerns [and] showing compassion and accompanying one another.” (teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reifenberg–moreau fye week 9). one of the big goals i hope to achieve on campus is contributing to fighting to promote a better spirit of inclusion and fraternity among the student body on campus. currently, though notre dame praises the spirit of inclusion, i truly believe that the sentiment is not shared by all members of the student body on campus. however, just because there is still work to be done doesn’t mean that we shouldn’t fight harder than ever to promote the “spirit of inclusion” on campus. (qqc week 10 / notre dame student mission moreau fye week 10, week 13). the ultimate aim should be to, as disciples of jesus, “stand side by side with all people” (constitutions of the congregations of holy cross moreau fye week 12). this is a really common principle that often gets overlooked due to how much it is seen within catholic messaging and cast aside as cliche, however, it is, in my eyes, the most important tenet of the catholic faith. generalizing catholic belief by zooming into our own community, which is largely catholic, the university praises a spirit of inclusion that aims to welcome all, however, many on this campus, faculty and student alike, hold intolerant views towards other people that directly contradict the principle of standing side by side with all people. whether issues of racial disparity, classism, lgbtq+ rights, not all on this campus and all within the larger faith respect and honor this message, which has been a large deterrent to positive change and a sense of unity, both within our campus and society at large. i have felt the negative effects of these views, as well as shared in and heard stories of others just like me. criticized for sexual orientation. looked down upon for socioeconomic standing. belittled or dismissed for the genuine challenges faced as a person of color. it prevents a true sense of belonging and comfort necessary in order to capacitate true brothership among society, as the hate and intolerance spewed by these views only breed further hate and intolerance by the victims of their negative effects. in our current society, plagued by issues of polarization and worsening societal intolerance, “from the workings of city government to the battle for the presidency, [our societal focuses] are increasingly distant from the actual needs of citizens”. (passion isn’t enough by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). while i myself cannot change the campus culture, much less our society as a whole, i can work to be a scholar who works to obtain knowledge both by way of perception and further validate that knowledge by way of healthy skepticism. i will ultimately gain an academic understanding that fosters empathy and a willingness to accept all those who stand before me on this campus, making everyone that i come in contact with feel accepted and heard so that i can contribute my small part to making this campus a better place and a better haven of academic progress and societal change, thus leading my own version of a life well-lived. matthew daly integration three writing my eulogy this week matthew daly, a member of our community, passed away. his life was characterized by his good heart and desire to help others and create a positive impact, however this would not come without its own struggle. our values are a product of our experiences in the form of nurture, education, faith, success, and mistakes. we remember his passing both out of respect and celebration, but also in order to learn by looking back over his lifetime and seeing how matthew’s experiences forged him. one particularly important part of his upbringing his undergraduate years at notre dame were critical to the discernment of his values and ambitions. the friends, acquaintances, and mentors who he met at college and the experiences they had together are critical in understanding his life. matt began practicing the secular sabbath, a time of separation from electronics and the stresses of life his freshman year of college. i recall him saying to me once, “when people are given responsibilities or set goals for themselves they quickly lose focus on the bigger picture of life. constantly searching for the next step or trudging through their daily work leaves people feeling tired and sad. “ he was not wrong when he said this. a philosopher who first introduced him to this concept explained how recent advances have diminished the ability of someone to find a safe haven from the stresses of the world (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). technology, which has intruded into everyone’s life, now puts a functionally infinite amount of information within our reach and has greatly increased our connectedness with each other. as such, more than ever we need to figure out how to filter through this information to live in tranquility. a life is not complete without a career in which one is devoted. for matt, his ambition was to help make some amount of beneficial change in the world. he had worked as a volunteer at a living history museum back in middle school, and it was there where he found his passion in working to spread knowledge. at notre dame he read about mary kate battle, a nominee for the domer dozen (a university alumni award) who used her engineering degree to teach children in the congo how program, so that they could advance their country and economy (“domer dozen nominees” by nd alumni association moreau fye week two). her work in parts of uganda and jordan allowed her to continue on her mission to spread technical knowledge in the third world. for matt, people like mary were highly inspirational, and as a computer science student at notre dame, he began to follow in her footsteps. his work bringing computing skills into africa uplifted communities and villages; he really was a generous person, and was willing to disregard his own physical desires to benefit strangers. this conviction came from his sense of faith and the learning that took place during his college years. but the urgency behind his action was a result of a nun who wanted him to remember his own coming death. i remember him saying something along the lines of “ as a freshman i still have time to orient myself towards a certain field of study and explore different career paths. ` an article by new york times writer ruth graham detailed how a convent nun was trying to remind people of their mortality in order for them to better plan their lives to be meaningful and spiritual (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die”, by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). though a somewhat unpleasant thought, this kind of reasoning is tied in with the necessity of life discernment which takes place during the four years one spends as an undergraduate. i remember him saying “the journey towards finding my role in business will be a long one, but the reward of a fulfilling career is enough of an incentive to continue.” this way of thinking is preached by the notre dame first year educators. they believe that when making an important life decision one should look at a problem from every angle, and balance the benefits and detriments (“navigating your career journey” by nd moreau moreau fye week 4). these kinds of decisions do not have to be made entirely on one’s own. talking with a friend can give someone valuable insight into their own strengths and weaknesses. a conversation between matt and his friend michael lead to him discovering his sense of adventure and values of innovation and accomplishment. this interaction, he told me, had a great sway on his decision to pursue a computer science degree (“week five discernment conversation activity” by nd moreau moreau fye week 5). yet not everything that comes in life is a result of a decision we make. sometimes, unfortunate things happen and put people in difficult spots. jd kim, a young man with dreams of becoming a chef and to explore the world was paralized after a snowboarding accident (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week 6). despite this terrible misfortune, and the period of depression that followed, he eventually found a new path to living a good life. his work in introspection and discoveries in faith led him to realize that oftentimes when we look only at what we do not have, we fail to see what we still have. kim later gained a doctorate degree in theology and works to teach others from his own experience and study. when bad things inevitably came up in matt’s life he tried to keep a level head and work to improve himself and his position. of course this is difficult for anyone to do, and it often takes time, but practicing the secular sabbath undoubtedly helped him meditate and develop new goals, much like dr. kim. finally, matt was someone who really wanted to see people fit in to his community. he was accepting of others regardless of their appearance or background because of works he read such as jurisdiction (“jurisdiction” by gregory boyle, moreau fye week 7). this book taught him that you can never truly know someone's background and experience and how acts of kindness can go a long way in overcoming barriers towards mutual understanding, and allowed him to spread love rather than division. although the circumstance that brings us all together today is the unfortunate passing of a community member, i want you all to look at the good things and practices that existed in his life, and use it as a reminder that we all will oneday find ourselves in his position. integration 3 anderson 1 a letter to the past dear 10 year old olivia, you’ve had an interesting couple years to say the least. i know hearing everyone talk about how great grandma anderson and grandpa fancher were and how good their lives were–even if that was just how friends and family members perceived them–was a bit overwhelming. it has probably led you to be thinking about how you want to live your life and what even constitutes a good life. i wish i could say the next few years clear those questions up. some parts of what you want your future to be will become more clear while some things will be even more complicated. despite this, i have developed a rough idea of what a life well-lived looks like. in order to live a life well-lived, you have to figure out and do what you love, build and sustain relationships, and work to help others as much as you can. one of the most important things to do in order to live a good life is to figure out and do what you love. every experience you have or hardship you go through will mold you into the person you are meant to be (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame ccd moreau fye week four). even if you struggle through an algebra class or a chemistry class, the hardships narrow down what you’re passionate about. more importantly, new experiences will open up new possibilities. you may join a club or a team and realize how much you love making music or public speaking. you may be given an opportunity to speak to a large group of people about something you are passionate about. all of these experiences will highlight things you love to do. actively participating in things you like to do leads to a well-lived life in general. finding out what you love to do comes from self-reflection and taking breaks when needed, even if it feels like you do not have the time (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). it may feel like you are getting more and more behind, but that is not https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ anderson 2 the case. you have to be able to take a breath to figure out what really makes you tick. only then can you move forward and put forth your best work possible. a well lived life will also include building and sustaining relationships. i know you want to be as independent as possible, that is not something that is going to change anytime soon. however, you still need to lean on other people sometimes, especially your parents. mom and dad occasionally know you better than you know yourself. they can see your passions and dreams. they want what is best for you and will offer advice if they think that you need it (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week five). they are able to possibly filter through thoughts that get too jumbled in the echo chamber of your mind. it does not matter if you mean to be stuck in your head or not, sometimes it is going to be out of your control. you have to rely on your family to help you through it (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). you also need to be open to relationships with people–friends, colleagues, classmates–who you may not agree with, even if you have preconceived judgements against them (“tattoos on the heart, chapter 8” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven). they do not have to be close relationships, but it is essential to know and understand people of different points of view. different opinions do not always have to lead to animosity. however, in the quest to form these relationships, it is also important to make sure that you do not let anyone treat you poorly. you have to stand up for yourself. as important relationships are in a well-lived life, no relationship is worth you being mistreated. a life well lived has to include helping others. your skills mean very little if you 1) brag about them and 2) only keep them to yourself. that does not mean that you have to give away every part of yourself. still, you have to try to do as much as possible for other people. this https://docs.google.com/document/d/1enimkell1re4ymblnyx9hga7imz8tvvmk5xkxt8usq0/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 anderson 3 should influence your career choice and also your decisions as to how you want to live your life outside of work (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). helping people can be extremely difficult, especially if you do it by yourself. this requires others to help in your endeavors. the best thing to keep in mind is your end goal. you can disagree with people in other ways, but you have to be able to put that aside to get the job done (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). the net benefits of the success of helping others will outweigh the strife caused by opposing opinions. even though it is daunting to consider, a well-lived life can be achieved by understanding and doing what you love, cultivating and sustaining relationships, and doing your best to help others. your passions can be discovered through different experiences and self-reflection. relationships are essential in helping you filter through the thoughts in your mind that may be irrational. they can also open your mind to new points of view, just be careful to always stay true to yourself in the relationships you obtain. helping others is extremely fulfilling. if you have the skills and abilities to help, you should use them. sometimes you have to work with people you do not necessarily agree with, but as long as the job gets done and the end goal is accomplished, it is alright. the ends will be justified by the means. you do not have to have everything figured out now or even years into the future. just keep doing what you are doing, make room for others, and you will be just fine. you have some big years ahead of you, so be excited! lots of love, nineteen year old olivia p.s. watch out for isaac getting taller than you, he’ll gloat forever (little brothers tend to do that). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 anderson 4 robert corrato integration 3 02/28/22 instructor: taylor kelly the robert corrato eulogy: the sequel to life as the name of this hereby integration states, this is robert corrato's eulogy. the title is bland and complex, the text is drastic yet straightforward, and the content is hopefully outright insane. eulogies rewrite and re-explain the fruitful life this specific person in the tribute had. i have fortunately never had to write this type of commentary before but have had to read multiple times. that, though, is completely inevitable throughout all walks of life. writing my eulogy is something that i have never thought about. i have thought about the contents of what i want to be in that eulogy, also known as my future, but never who will be writing it for me, what things they will get wrong, what things will be made up, and if i would even decide if i liked it or not. on earth, i wouldn't have an opinion of it anyway. to begin this process of writing my eulogy, i would have to say this first. i am extremely superstitious, a little more "stitious" really than most. let us pray that i will never have to write one of these essays about anyone, especially myself. "to begin: i am robert corrato, and i am writing on behalf of the passing of robert corrato due to unknown and unfortunate circumstances. this is extremely unfortunate, and he was loved and adored by so many, his family, friends, and students of both the episcopal academy and the university of notre dame. robert, better known as rob, worked his tail off at most things he did. this includes his passions on and off the lacrosse field, especially his filmmaking and content creation. i am saying he did the majority due to his inability to clean his room, but he was still able to do all these other things so well and to the best of his ability. his connection with his sister was absolutely the strongest relationship out of anyone else in his lifetime. olivia, his sister, is two years younger than rob, and she looked up to him every day. through rob's amazing perseverance and the support of his sister, she will now be able to reach the goals she set for herself so many years ago to play division 1 field hockey at a prestigious university. and, of course, they loved each other very much. rob's parents, donna and rob, would say something similar. their firstborn was the single joy of their life until olivia's birth in 2004. rob had the goal of living a dream-like life that was unfortunately cut short. at notre dame, he was majoring in film, television, and theater with an intended real estate minor that he most likely wouldn't use. his one true passion was making movies. in response to that, while doing so, of course, he wanted to live his life like a movie. ever since he was little, he would sit in front of the television for hours, watching films from the star wars saga to spongebob squarepants to cars. his passion for storytelling is something that shouldn't go unnoticed, not just from rob but all the people in the world. "it's an extremely underrated talent," rob would say. this comes in every shape and form. rob's dream job would have to be something extreme, traveling the world and recording everything about it. making his experiences into something for other people to enjoy would be something that wouldn't make him happy, but his friends as well. another thing rob loved was sailing. sailing, although a sport that not many people get into, fell right into rob's arms. being surrounded by water in new jersey, rob's competitive spirit allowed him to succeed in racing and eventually coaching young kids who were just like him once upon a time. the vast amount of time spent allowed rob to make plenty of friends with who he hung out every day of the summer, rain or shine. lastly, his compassion for hope and the lord gives me great faith that heaven is an amazing place and rob's time there will be amazing, nonetheless. we all loved him, and he would be dearly, dearly missed." now looking back after, i quite literally wrote about what i wish my eulogy would be. at the same time, this is something i never want to think about, as i have stated many times before. over the past seven weeks of the moreau first-year experience (fye), each class period offered me a different outlook on how my life should be "well-lived." according to my own definition, living a life that is fruitful in your own mind is something that each and every person should grasp. this can be your own passion or path you want to take with your life. in order to find that passion, you must start with self-reflection. self-reflection happened in my sophomore year of high school when i decided i wanted to quit my computer science path that i intended to follow and completely change subjects to writing and film. i realized this most specifically during class when i realized that sitting at a desk and consolidated to a cubical box is something that i would never want to do. so, in the world of pico iyer, "…stepping farther back and standing still, we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture." ("why we need to slow down our lives" moreau fye week 1) finding the many empty canvases for you to paint your own artwork on is something that i especially allude to. my visual art is my paint, and the internet for all of those to see being my canvas allows me to reach out, jumping over the obstacles that come before me. again, life isn't life with some type of turmoil. unfortunately, that's just the way the cookie crumbles. discrepancies in life that you wish never happened come around, whether it's not getting the job you want or losing someone special to you, and they show how you must overcome adversity. sadness has been prevalent in my life and everyone's life. i expressed the greatest sadness quite literally writing my own eulogy for my own death. while our time is short, utilizing everything around you and making those relationships with the special people in your life aids your exploration into yourself and into your future endeavors. in week 7 of moreau, pope francis speaks about how solidarity is "is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone." ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" moreau fye week 7) the people you choose to grow with and experience life with. as in my eulogy, i have made plenty of great friends and many long-lasting memories with those friends from all across the country. from pennsylvania to new jersey to indiana to colorado, the relationship you have with someone proves that it doesn't matter where they are from, their social class, or what kind of things they like and dislike. what truly matters is how both you and this other person have a mutual connection of love and respect. father hesburgh reiterates this in the documentary movie hesburgh. he states, "treating people how you want to be treated in this case is something that should always be practiced, regardless of who someone is or what their relationship is to you." (hesburgh moreau fye week 2) my father always said that you must "treat others the way you want to be treated." this is an exact repetition of those very words i heard each and every morning as i shut my car door and walked into school. during my eulogy, i mentioned how much time and effort i put into my schoolwork, the friends i made there, and the relationship i will have with this physical location for the rest of my life. going to a private, k-12 school all my life had me grow up with all the same kids for the fourteen years i attended the episcopal academy, better known as ea. after graduating, i realized i made the right decision committing so much time and effort into this place. ea now has an obligation to repay me, which is something i believe is totally fair. ea and notre dame both have given me the choice of doing what i feel interests me and advances during those interests. for the majority of my eulogy, i talk about my passion which is film and content creation. these places have taught me that this choice "…requires a lot of exploration and research. it's not a one-step process." (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4) the industry i have chosen isn't necessarily a kind one. if you cannot produce what attracts an audience, you are cut. the film industry is full of bumps and bruises, hills and valleys, etc. in order to make your mark on society and be known as that director, that actor, or that famous person, i cannot reiterate more about how you must continue trying. right now, i am simultaneously editing a silent film for my introduction to production class and writing this reflection. still, i have to keep in mind that failure lurks around every corner, facing the darkest realities of life that we (must) find light in them." ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" moreau fye week 3) finding positives in your negative moments are some of the best things you can do in times where you must triumph. when i am imagining these thoughts, something i have done often to combat this is picking up meditation. not many people know about this because it's something i haven't talked about and kept to myself for all the right reasons. when i completed week six of moreau's qqc, i was glad to be able to comment on my patterns of meditation along with developing questions about the different meditational videos i listened to. one passage that struck me states, "...many people are going through these citations." the flavors are all different, but it is a part of our lives." (self compassion break moreau fye week 6) having people around you to understand what specifics you are going through and share the same type of mindfulness is incredibly rare and important, i found out. making the change from a high school community to a university setting showed me a reality that there are fewer people that care about you. fortunately, i have found my people, and that's all that matters, yet, knowing not everyone has your back was a bit of a surprise being from such a small community. having a strong sense of discernment is good in these scenarios from both ends, involving your conscience and your friends' conscience. my discernment through my good friend julia told many things that both i knew about myself, and i didn't know. she expressed to me that i know what i want to do with my life, but i do have my doubts. she said, "while sometimes you might doubt the path leading to your future, your motivation and dedication will take you where you want to go." (julia difazio moreau fye week 5) i admire her perspective of me, and during my eulogy, i compared this to how i had a very set thought about myself and about what i had in my life. i take both j's (julia) and all of the other close members of my circle's opinions very seriously, and i trust their judgment heavily. overall, my life is only the way it is because of the people around me. i am truly blessed. there is no other way to say it, and when i am off this earth, i hope the memories and ways i have affected lives remain my greatest legacy. capstone integration korth 1 catherine wagner moreau fye 29 april 2022 the road map to a meaningful life on highway signs in my home state of nebraska, a slogan is etched to attract tourists: nebraska...the good life. there's a reason why this motto draws attention. people are constantly pursuing a good, meaningful, and happy life. however, few have the road map to get there. i intend to live a meaningful life by practicing mindfulness, pursuing wisdom and truth, and fostering communities of love. to live a meaningful life, being mindful of your well-being, your goals, and your values is key. in my god and the good life class from last semester, several philosophers valued living a life of contemplation. “‘all the unhappiness of men,’ the seventeenth-century french mathematician and philosopher blaise pascal famously noted, ‘arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). in a fast-paced world, however, it can be difficult to find the time for self-reflection. at the beginning of the semester, i challenged myself to take time each week to self-reflect. i’ve been keeping a journal that has really helped me reflect on my thoughts and feelings. however, i’m also careful to reflect in a way that’s helpful rather than harmful. “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ korth 2 by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week six). taking a suggestion from the article, i try to ask myself what questions like “what am i feeling?” instead of why questions like “why am i feeling this way?” i’ve found this strategy very helpful when journaling. something that requires a great deal of self-awareness is choosing a career. you have to know yourself well enough to choose a career that fulfills you, suits your talents, and serves those around you. i am currently aiming at becoming a lawyer. to discern a career path, there is a process to follow. “after you leave nd, some of the details (like choosing a major) will change, but the core elements remain the same: learn about yourself, explore careers, reflect, & take action” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). two steps of this process involve reflection and self-awareness. having conversations with people who know you well is another great way to learn about yourself. from my conversation with andy, i learned that there are some things about myself that i’m very self-aware of, but he also said some things that i wasn’t expecting to hear. for example, he said that he thinks i could benefit from being more direct with people (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). this is something i’ve given some thought to over the semester, and i’ve realized that he’s right. having conversations like these are beneficial because they can help you learn things about yourself that you otherwise wouldn’t be able to discover by yourself. another great way to be mindful of the life you’re living is to remember that you will die someday. “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). in moreau, i reflected on my death by writing my own eulogy. at first, the idea of writing my own eulogy was https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1egpnhiehpdfetpfkf1b1nkmystmnr4g6ivpgvfygmc0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1egpnhiehpdfetpfkf1b1nkmystmnr4g6ivpgvfygmc0/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html korth 3 a bit daunting. however, i think i learned a lot about my goals and values through the exercise (“celebrate life by remembering death” by moreau fye week eight). it helped me better understand what it will take for my life to be meaningful. in a society where it is becoming increasingly difficult to trust the flow of information, i highly value the pursuit of truth and wisdom, especially in relation to politics. due to the growing presence of echo chambers and epistemic bubbles, people’s belief systems are often corrupted. “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree, which is accelerating political polarization” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). to prevent myself from getting wrapped up in an echo chamber or epistemic bubble, i aspire to engage with a wide variety of opinions and perspectives, especially when it comes to contentious topics like politics and religion. someone else who lived by this mentality in his life was father hesburgh. “sometimes we get passionate about our own personal causes or the causes we have great faith in, but he was always a person that could look at the wider picture,” (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). i’m inspired by father hesburgh listening to all sides of a debate even when he disagreed. i think there’s a lot of value in understanding how people with opposing views think and feel. one of my primary goals in life is to foster communities of love. i will do this by ending cycles of hate, accompanying others, and fighting for equality in my everyday life. to end cycles of hate, we must first with ourselves. “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it…each of us needs to get to know people who differ from us. we must all make a conscious decision and effort to expand our circles” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1doyoqvftw-qy5kjre35o9vuedmieltm1kux3oyv5qri/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=45s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=45s https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ korth 4 marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). building relationships with people requires a willingness to embrace vulnerability. “...we all need to see that we are in each other’s jurisdictions–only, all the time. and yet, there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude. allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (“tattoos on the heart, chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). we learn and grow by connecting with others, empathizing with their experiences, and sharing stories of our own. in doing so, we see the humanity in all. our world is filled with suffering, and i am committed to oferring support in whatever ways i can. however, it’s not always as simple as removing people from their suffering; more often, humanitarianism consists of meeting people in their suffering and walking through it together, which is how we arrive at the word accompaniment. “to accompany someone is to go somewhere with him or her, to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an end. there's an element of mystery, of openness, of trust, in accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). accompaniment can take on a variety of forms. it might be an effort like taking a humanitarian trip to a foreign country, but more often it looks like offering to get lunch with a stranger or being there for a friend when they’re going through something. accompaniment is a vital practice in creating communities of love. in order to foster truly loving communities, all members must be included. the university of notre dame professes a spirit of inclusion in du lac. “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). however, this https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/143102 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/143102 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ korth 5 spirit of inclusion must be more than an ideal. several minority groups still feel unwelcome and unsafe on this campus. for example, there is still no mention of gender identity or sexual orientation in the university’s notice of non-discrimination. one of my goals before graduating is getting this changed. to do this, i plan to get involved in groups like prismnd and student government so that i can collaborate with people who share my goals. beyond notre dame, i will continue to fight for equality through my career as a lawyer. on the road of life, we encounter a series of highway signs that promise guidance to happiness. however, tourist traps can cause the driver to forget where they were headed in the first place. a road map is needed to stay on track. capstone integration nhat nyugen moreau first year studies 26 april 2022 finding myself and helping build others when sitting down to complete my final assignment during week 13 of the moreau first year studies course, i would have never thought that a 200 word mission statement written simply to complete the assignment would create such introspective depth for me as a result (mission statement moreau fye week 13). during week 6, we learned the dangers of introspection: “in truth, introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). however, at this point in time, it had created a sense of self that, quite truthfully, i had yet to feel before. being able to define myself through a mission statement, which is admittedly a hard task, can be aided by accompaniment and relationships, as defined in my mission statement. accompaniment can, “facilitate a return to the core purpose of the educational endeavor, aligning with the joy and pursuit of life-long learning, as part of a learning journey together” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). being able to find purpose through education, and then subsequently applying those skills to a meaningful vocation in society can help further the sense of self i established when first creating my mission statement. when trying to find this useful skill set, it is important to ask myself the questions: “1) do you get a kick out of it? 2) are you any good at it? 3) does anyone want you to do it?” as a means of deciphering what it is i can best contribute to my own and society’s https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit benefit (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). using these questions, i can find the “best major for me” not just “the best major” (navigating your career journey moreau fye week 4). just because one major has a higher starting average salary, that does not mean it will put me on the most fulfilling path in life. navigating through a career journey, for anyone, is a highly stressful environment. while it is stressful, we must be able to embrace our uniqueness and utilize it to our advantage. we can draw from world renowned father hesburgh who, as a priest, “did a lot of things that were not very priestly, he was an entrepreneur” (hesburgh documentary moreau fye week 2). in a similar fashion, we can set ourselves apart from the pack. in my case, as an economics major, it can mean embracing a different type of education in order to broaden my intellectual horizons outside of just one field of learning. through accompaniment, we often find ourselves creating meaningful relationships; “i value holding strong relationships with others, and i sometimes place what it takes to build those relationships above my own personal values” (moreau fye week 5). by examining the relationships of a person, we can find revealing information about a person as people, almost always, find themselves in social circles where people are similar to them. going forward, in order to implement my mission statement into my life and education at notre dame for the next three years, i can start with creating different and new relationships. the best place to start is bursting a bubble that has encased me throughout the entirety of my life. this is important because, “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). this can mean finding new clubs at notre dame and establishing myself as an active and vocal member within those micro-communities. while i have attempted to do so already, i https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s feel as if there is work still to be done; with a year of college experience and an established comfort at notre dame, it should be easier than ever to create new relationships. as a white male student at notre dame, it is my responsibility to recognize that, “socialized into a deeply internalized sense of superiority and entitlement we are either not consciously aware of or can never admit to ourselves, we become highly fragile in conversations about race” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about race” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week 10). so, while immersing myself into new and diverse communities, i must find a way to escape this fragility so i can best build relationships. also, common to every notre dame student, we are now in a position of privilege by being able to receive a prestigious higher education and having a vast alumni network in our hands. so, we (those around my age) must do something to promote and uplift under-resourced communities who, “over the last century, the us has tried repeatedly and with little success to address the question of helping” (msca symposium abstracts moreau fye week 12). one avenue in pursuing this goal can be found from the “parable of the good samaritan: seeing the injured man lying on the ground...he paid out of his pocket for him to be assisted” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis). while, as broke college students, we do not have money to give out of our pocket, we do have the ability to give the knowledge we receive at notre dame, spreading it to those who, given an equal opportunity, can accomplish the same achievements. all of these changes, which are presumably to be made in the next three years, will happen if i live in the moment with those around me. in week 1, we learned that “many in silicon valley observe an “internet sabbath” every week, during which they turn off most of their devices from, say, friday night to monday morning” (“why we need to slow down our https://www.huffpost.com/entry/why-its-so-hard-to-talk-to-white-people-about-racism_b_7183710 https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/ https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). in an ever-progressing technological world, observing some form of this sabbath can help us find accompaniment, build relationships with friends and god, and help us establish a future in which everyone is involved, not just those who are born into privilege and wealth. word count: 1029 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ integration three integration 3 the story of dylan from dillon today, we honor the life of or if you ask any notre dame student, dylan from dillon. i am sorry for calling you that dylan, but they needed to know. one of the first things i want to talk about is how terrible dylan was at taking time for himself. he always felt the need to be running around like a mad man, whether that be studying for his own test, hanging out with friends, or helping people in need. although it never seemed like he took time for himself, this was his form of meditation in a way (not studying for test), but dylan genuinely enjoyed every second of hanging with his friends and just taking a break from his studies ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau week 1). he took the study to heart from this article where it said that taking time to yourself will improve your own thinking skills. he learned from this and went from a man who really never took time to himself (especially during something like a finals week) to one who planned a specific time of when he would drop his book and just go hangout with friends and take a break. the next thing that i would say about dylan was that he was able to form connections with anyone. for example, in week two of his moreau class he was required to look over the domer dozen to see what young notre dame alumni were doing after college. i remember he was instantly able to make a connection with dr. austin hickman who graduated from notre dame in 2016 (gallery: review the recent and previous honorees of the notre dame alumni association's "domer dozen." moreau week 2). i know seeing how he was going in with the intention of computer science, but switching to finance while also being able to do some form of computer science really made him feel less pressure that he had to pick one or the other. he saw that there were ways to combine the do rather than just fully committing to one which put a smile on his face every time he thought about it. dylan was also very big on helping the community around him. he took inspiration from a quote from week 3 of moreau, “does the community call us to this work?” ("three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) moreau week 3). when he read this, i remember him calling me and https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884?module_item_id=149291 complaining that this should not even be a question. it is not the community that calls us to work, everyone should just want to help everyone out because it was the right thing to do. dylan stood by this principle that if everyone was just willing to help others without any incentive, then the world would simply just become a better place. this was something he was incredibly passionate about and i loved that about him. although there were not many major flaws with dylan, one of the main things i noticed was that he was always worried about what his career path would be until his second semester of freshman year in college. this is where he saw the quote, “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process.” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau first yearexperience moreau week 4). this calmed dylan’s nerves as he was able to relate this idea to his own life and how we as a family were never able to pick where we wanted to go on vacation too. it took a very long time and a lot of sit downs to finally decide and sometimes we would even change what we originally chose. knowing that he could change his career path opened dylan’s mind to exploring things he may have not once tried and in doing this, he found that he may want to be an econ major. i know dylan would even try to tell his sister to calm down and relax because she does not need to know exactly what she will do with her life at this exact moment (as she also used to stress about this). this i know had a lasting effect on her and she is glad dylan shared this with her. the next thing i want to talk about is the conversation i had with dylan just a few weeks ago where he asked me a bunch of questions about himself and i had to answer accordingly. the first question that he asked me was what do i think he valued or desired in life and i remember giving him the story of when he helped his sister. she was upset over a test one day after school and i saw him skip going out with his friends to hangout with her and cheer her up. i explained to him that actions like these are what he is like and i hope that he continues this throughout the rest of his life (conversation with my mom moreau week 5). dylan loved his family more than anything in life and we all knew he would do https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ anything for any one of us and this was my favorite trait about him. he loved us all and we loved him dearly as well. another thing that dylan did a very good job of was knowing who he was and who he wanted to be regardless of what others thought. he never just went with what he thought people would like, but instead did what he thought was right and what would make him feel happy about himself. i remember him talking about the quote, “but to my astonishment, our data told the exact opposite story. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) moreau week 6). he completely agreed with this quote as he would always argue that the people that just went with the flow were ones that were trying to make others happy and thus were not always making themselves happy. they then may think they're happy when deep down inside they really are not. meanwhile, people who do know themselves, are stressed and anxious because they know exactly what they want and thus are worried if they cannot get it. although he knows that it is not the best thing in the world to stress over things, he felt that he only did it because he truly knew what he wanted. one of the final things dylan was passionate about was bringing different groups of people together to get a job done. whether this would be in a school project or bringing different people from around the community together to help make the area a better place, he was always looking for different opportunities to connect people together to reach a common goal. one quote that stuck with dylan came from pope francis, “we have so much to do, and we must do it together. but how can we do that with all the evil we breathe every day?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted moreau week 7). this was the question dylan was always trying to answer as he always wanted to bring people together regardless of the differences they may have had. he did not care if some people were deemed to be bad, he saw the good in everyone and thus tried to bring people together regardless of their reputation. this was another one of my favorite traits of dylan and i will miss this everyday. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript in conclusion, dylan was loved by everyone he met and tried to be as nice as anyone could be to anyone that approached him. was he perfect, absolutely not, did he have flaws, absolutely, but this did not mean that dylan was not an angel. he was one of the kindest people i ever met and i will miss him dearly everyday. his presence touched everyone's heart and put a smile on everyone's face and i know he will be missed by all. i love you dylan and will miss you dearly. no matter how much i hated it when you were alive, i wish i could hear, “what is the wagon today” one last time. 1 | p a g e . april 27, 2022 introduction this prompt poses several questions; i shall attempt to answer them in a coherent, logical, and structured manner – with a constant, overarching focus on the explicitly mentioned concept of reflective leadership. i shall begin with how i would interpret my purpose and role here at notre dame, followed by my personal wishes and goals that surround the reflective leadership i hope to embody in my professional career. my purpose at notre dame this university is, first and foremost, a university; by virtue of this fact, any discussion of my purpose at notre dame must necessarily begin with a reflection on learning. my primary purpose here is to learn – for instance, our very first week of class addressed the topic of studium. and i do certainly possess such a zeal for learning and enlarging the mind, painful as it may be. i rarely question the idea that i should learn, instead asking myself what i ought to learn. what learnings shall be the most important? where should i focus my time? i believe an answer to this issue may appear in the form of a classic aphorism frequently employed by this very university, which delineates a clear distinction between the education of the heart and an education of the mind. regarding the latter of these educational types: i cannot freely make a strong argument against the learning of facts and other pieces of important information. one may certainly imagine a scenario in which a deep knowledge of the calculations involved in capital budgeting may be quite relevant – or perhaps an instance when i might have to attempt a second-derivative calculation. and yet, i am not at all satisfied by this form of learning, simply memorising mathematical formulae and key functions of business. i am sure that the ‘four p’s of marketing’ shall certainly be of some help come what may, but this information (as is the case for everything i have previously mentioned) may easily be accessed in any of the thousands of textbooks that have been published on every imaginable academic subject. if i may therefore find in an examination of a textbook all the information covered in my classes, why have i decided to commit myself (and huge sums of money, i hasten to add) to four years of strenuous study that might otherwise be replaced by a library card? during our fourth week of the course, we discussed mentorship – how can a mentor claim success when they only ever recite facts from a book? i seek a mentoring environment akin to that which was described by sharon parks, not an environment of recitation. 1 one may argue that professors provide additional expertise and knowledge not found in any textbook – however, anyone willing to make such claims has certainly not even begun to understand the true depth of academic literature, regardless of how mundane or obscure the subject. if there exists a 500-page textbook 1 sharon parks, big questions, worthy dreams: mentoring young adults in their search for meaning, purpose, and faith. enlightenment and reflective leadership how an ‘education of the mind’ can lead to reflective and positive leadership. 2 | p a g e discussing the history of the pencil, 2 then i would submit to you that any knowledge conveyed by any professor in any class must concurrently exist within a textbook. i would therefore rather assert that i have come to this university with the hope of primarily educating my heart – learning in abstractly meaningful ways and engaging in a process of discovery predicated upon genuine experience. i hope to learn that which cannot simply be conveyed by small black lettering on a white page; i hope, paul blaschko asserts, to learn to subject my “beliefs to critical and rigorous modes of thinking,” or to learn how to ask profound questions, like those posed on “the nature of love, justice, and virtue.” 3 i want to be taught how to live – to not be instructed on what to think, but how i should go about thinking. when i encounter true challenges later in life (the most important challenges: those of an existential or deeply personal nature) i hope to have learned these practices, as we discussed in our sixth week of class, which shall help me to grow beyond. i would therefore hope to call my notre dame education more than simply educational, but enlightening. in no small part, i hope to derive significant lessons from my experiences – and i may cite my work in the student government as an example. i intend to dedicate myself to the service of others, and i have already begun this task here, at notre dame – hoping, in part, to solve the several issues enumerated by william deresiewicz, who i have already greatly referenced in my several reflections. i remember reading his composition and nodding in agreement; many of the problems he describes seem so real and pervasive on our campus – his assertation that college students of a high calibre (like those at notre dame) are often faced by feelings of “emptiness and aimlessness and isolation,” 4 for instance. i hope to improve the quality of life for my fellow students and help stave away these negative emotions. my fuller vision of life & reflective leadership for social change in essence, i hope to improve the world; i wish i might look at myself at the end of my career and satisfyingly claim that i, too, managed to take several wild leaps until i managed to reach the abyss of freedom – not just freedom for me, but for the rest of mankind – described during our final week on transcendence by annie dillard. 5 i hope to surpass myself and find true transcendence in the assistance of others, allowing people to find personal freedom, meaning, and contentment in their lives. put simply (and using reifenberg’s language) i want to accompany others. as he says, “we are all in this together.” 6 2 henry petroski, the pencil: a history of design and circumstance 3 paul blaschko, the good life method: interview with meghan sullivan and paul blaschko 4 william deresiewicz, excellent sheep: the miseducation of the american elite and the way to a meaningful life 5 annie dillard, stalking, from pilgrim at tinker creek 6 steve reifenberg, teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together moreau integration 3 chizoma duru integration 3 i’m a woman, phenomenally. phenomenal woman, that’s me! we are gathered here today to celebrate but not to mourn, we are assembled to pay our respects to a life well lived. i remember when chizoma lived, she always made me promise that her funeral would be more like a party than a memorial. “why?” i would ask her, and she would respond that we celebrate those who have lived well, enjoyed their time on earth and done their part in ensuring that others have better grounds to walk on. that was , a fearless african woman. i believe one of the most remarkable things about dr. duru was her mastery of the art of intentionality and reflection. i remember that she would always reiterate a quote from poco iyer that said “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas really means and to take in the larger picture” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer-moreau fye week 1). this quote reflected throughout her life as she always put her mental health and well being first. she practiced reflection and intentionality in everything she did. she ensured that she was intentional about the time she spent doing yoga, the time she spent working on projects, the time she spent with her loved ones and even the time she spent with herself. do not get me wrong, she was a busy woman, and that was her reasoning for why her intentionality was paramount. she never let those around her forget to do these things as well. she encouraged us to take days off, allocate us-time, build strong relationships and explained that these were the recipes to productivity. “it is precisely those who are busiest who need to give themselves a break”(why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer-moreau fye week 1), she always said and carried out. moreover, her reflective techniques were always evolving, whether by engaging in conversation with a companion to learn more about herself, journalling or simply just dishing out constructive self-criticism to ensure that she continued to improve. she defined the balance of having self love but still striving for self-improvement. (reflection with my mummoreau fye week 5) chizoma, was a table shaker. she didn’t enter spaces to blend into their practices but she was an agent of change. she was one of the most transformative women i had ever met, and i saw it in everything she put her heart into. she was a crucial part of the advocacy for women’s presence in politics in africa, she promoted the intra continental economic relationships between african countries, and she was a formidable figure and voice for african women everywhere. “mama africa”, i would call her, because her passions for pan africanism and women’s empowerment were practically written on her forehead. i believe the most beautiful thing about this aspect of chizoma’s personality was the fact that she was committed to delivering excellence after excellence, and would not dish out or receive anything less. however, she wouldn’t oppress you into improvement, she would hold your hand and walk with you, till you see the potential for greatness in yourself. she would hold you accountable, motivate you to be the most formidable version of yourself, engage in passionate conversations and still remain your bestest friend. she always spoke about how she owed a lot of these passions to notre dame, and most importantly father hesburgh. even though she never met him she was inspired by his ability to declare things like “i decided if i was going to be president i had to shake things up” ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2), and the fact that people around him were aware that “hesburgh didn’t accept anything less than excellence” ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). dr. duru was a career woman, in and out. people around her often classified her as a “doyenne” or a “boss lady”. however, she was not just an average lady in the workforce, she was a phenomenal woman who always did jobs that would not just enrich her person but improve the lives of the people around her. her passion was her people. she ensured that whatever she laid her hands on would in some way find itself back to her community, her country and the african continent at large. during her professional degrees, she ensured she engrossed herself in knowledge that would be beneficial to her community, she started her own non profit at the age of 20, dedicated her life to humanitarian work and eventually slowed down to become a professor at the university of cape town, where she aimed to instill the same fire for community development that she had in her students, so they could become community builders. in all her classes and conversations about vocation she would always ask her students to ask themselves “the three questions”, by father micheal himes, which were “what gives you joy, what are you really good at, and what do the people around you need?” ( "three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week 4). she expressed that those were the questions that led her to lead a life of happiness because she gave the people around her a reason to smile. she also never let anyone around her forget that change is constant, so if we decide that our interests change, we should practice flexibility and chase our dreams, because careers aren’t built in a day. they are built, remodeled, demolished and rebuilt many times over before people find their perfect fit. she agreed very greatly with dr. donald super, when he said “ he contended that success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement career self-concepts” ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 6). this is why i never failed to call her a mother figure and a visionary in all our lives. whenever i spoke to her about how she was able to attain all these things, she told me that it was not by her might but by god’s grace and favor. she once said to me that she interacted with a story about jihoon kim, while she was at university at notre dame and the words he shared stuck with him. he said “ i will use these 5 minutes, to not just pray about myself but pray for others, pray for my loved ones and i will utilize these 5 minutes and do something about it https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149885 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149885 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ instead of just focusing on what we can not do” (“5 minutes” (aria swarr, grotto) moreau fye week 6). she explained that jihoon kim became disabled after a ski accident, but he still had a positive outlook on life, so what was her excuse! this was one of the many reasons why she was extremely kind to others, always had a smile on her face and kept us all in her prayers. she loved with her whole heart and shared that love with everyone around her. she shared with me that she may not be able to do everything and help everyone but she will give 150% to those who she can help and that which she can do. i would argue that she gave 200%. especially to the people she loved. she was extremely intentional about keeping good people around her and maintaining positive relationships . she solidified her beliefs in the fact that no one person deserved life more than another, and everyone was equally worthy of love, care and affection. she would often add that if we wouldn’t believe her, we should take it from the words of pope francis: “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferencesmoreau fye week 8). it is because of this overwhelming love and kindness that we are seated here, celebrating the life of a phenomenally, phenomenal woman like chizoma edenavo antan duru. so to our professor, mother, wife, teacher, role model and above all our best friend. we will forever cherish your memory, we will forever reminisce about your contagious laughs, when we walk by nature we will take some time to smell the roses and above all we will love people more than we know how to. i am glad to have crossed paths with you and i am proud that your life was the epitome of a life well lived. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149918 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149932 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149932 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149932 moreau integration 3 march 04, 2022 life is complicated, it's a learning process and just like many things in life, some people get the hang of it really easily and others may struggle or have trouble finding a comfortable place in it. despite how well you face life and the obstacles that are partnered with it that often appear in the most unexpected of places, the most important thing to remember is that all life is a good life depending on the way that you look at it. by no means had his entire life figured out and he would often stop at the obstacles and struggle to find a way to move past them but he understood this. he understood that his life was a life well lived despite the various factors and occurrences that could have made him think otherwise and i believe that we can all agree he had a great life. for it was the interactions of his life that he would often say are the most meaningful moments and the ones that we should narrow our focus on like being able to make another person smile, laughing uncontrollably with a close friend, or maintaining meaningful relationships. by taking a moment to step back and reflect on luis’s life, we can learn about what made his life so great and take a thing or two away from this to incorporate into our own lives to live like him. luis was a person who lived for meaningful conversations and shared experiences with others around him, for it was these things that he said would stay with him even if he lost everything tangible in life. if you asked him what he would enjoy most about being a place such as disneyland or the beach, he would not answer “the drop of the roller coaster” or “swimming through the ocean” instead he would say, how him and his friend could not stop laughing after telling each other to jokes to stay entertained in the line or the conversation that he had with the man about his prized boat. it is these small yet memorable moments that luis looked forward to and which he wished more people would get excited about. nowadays, it is easy to lose ourselves in the insignificant parts of our lives such as technology and realize the beauty of real life interactions. luis would often state how much he agreed that technology caused people to “feel as though we are standing next to a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded, changing with every microsecond” ( moreau, week 1). we should take luis’s wish into account of our own lives and realize how short life is and how the key to living it well isn’t to shove our faces into our phones but rather to put the phone down and see how memorable it can be to put ourselves back into the real world. as mentioned previously, although luis would often say he had a great life, he would also acknowledge the fact that throughout his life there was a great deal of struggle. struggle and obstacles are inevitable parts of life that we should learn to tackle head on and embrace rather than stray away from them. in many of the conversations that people would have with luis about struggles or issues that they were encountering in their lives, he would often say “you need to go through the worst to get to the best.” for he was a firm believer that struggle was necessary in order to grow as a person and we know that he grew greatly from combating his struggle and using it as motivation. we also know how much luis valued helping others and he lived by the philosophy that we have a moral obligation to help others around us and better their lives for that in turn will better ours. father hesburgh once stated “there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance, human prejudice, and at times, human stupidity’ (moreau, week 2). luis thought about this quote a lot and what exactly father hesburgh meant by this, to which he came to the conclusion that he was referring to the struggle that many people around the world and around us face and this is due to many people’s ignorance or not realizing that they can have a substantial impact on another person’s life if they decided to help them. so let’s learn from this quote and from luis and make the change in our lives to dedicate ourselves to helping people so that we may also move towards a well lived life. as we reflect on luis’s life this must also make us think about how important it is for us to appreciate our lives such as he did. luis did many things throughout his day such as playing the daily wordle or making sure to give his dog a hug before walking out of the door. however, there is one thing that he did every morning that greatly helped him throughout the day and the struggle and that was to wake up and go to sleep every day by saying thank you to god and thinking about how fortunate he was to live the life he did. as appreciative as he was however, he would also think about the dark parts of his life and how they gave meaning to the good ones. luis would often say that “in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (moreau, week 3). in many of the conversations that he had with people, he would always encourage them to talk about their darkness and any negative events occurring in their lives. he is remembered by his ability to help others overcome their darkness and by facing his own in order to give light to the other aspects of life. luis is also remembered by his work ethic and his ambition which led him to where he was and contributed to his many accomplishments throughout his life. luis would often say that it doesn’t matter what you do in life, so long as you do it with all your heart and give one hundred percent of yourself to it. luis was extremely hard working and did everything in life with 100 percent of his effort and it can be seen by his accomplishments how important that was to achieving them. this would also be an immense contribution to his life as he believed that if a person “actively engaged in the process, takes ownership, and utilized the tools at their disposal they will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying life” (moreau, week 4). another important part of luis’s life that he will be remembered for is his ability to accept his weakness and look for ways in which he can improve it. luis would do this by reaching out to those in his life that he looked up to and would have honest conversations with them about himself and his weakness and use the advice given to him by applying it in all areas of life. one issue that luis faced in his life but that he would often work hard to overcome was accepting himself in certain areas of his life and realizing how important it was for him to talk about his issues of acceptance. luis often would say that “having conversations about topics that while difficult at times, will be beneficial and pivotal to our growth in life” ( moreau, week 5). finally, luis’s life was far from perfect but he did think a lot about what everything meant and who he was. it is important for us to think about who we are in this life and by realizing this build off on that to continue to make ourselves beneficial for the world and make ourselves happy so that we may experience a life well lived. luis will be remembered by his deep thoughts about life and where he stood in all of it. luis did struggle at one point in finding this answer as he would often go deep into introspection but in the wrong way. introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences if performed incorrectly but by thinking about our life from the right perspective and asking the right questions we can dive deeper into who we are (moreau, week 6).. luis asked himself a lot about who he was and not what he wanted to become, but as soon as he came to this realization he dedicated himself to his passions such as education amongst the youth and studying pre-med for he realized that he was a person who wanted to help others. he also realized that by helping others he would be able to continue to form meaningful relationships and have those interactions which he knew were important in life and contributed to his overall happiness. pope francis once stated, “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i”, separated from the other, we can only build the future by standing together and including everyone” (moreau, week 7). luis was still figuring out his life but he understood the important parts of what made his life great and what he had to do to keep growing this life well. he will be remembered by the interactions and special moments he had with others, his urge to help others and stand united, and his love for himself and wanting to grow. looking towards the future by i believe in the catholic faith centered on the teachings of jesus. i believe in acting kindly towards others and giving my time selflessly. i believe in loving those around and having close ties to one’s family. i believe in community and that it is important to form one to turn towards during times of struggle and times of joy. i believe in inclusivity and the importance of having each person feel welcome in their community. being successful means to strive towards these beliefs and living out these qualities each day. this is put into practice by reaching out to friends who are struggling. these aspects are also seen when friendships grow deeper because of shared experiences based on trust and respect. the highest good in life is being able to think back on the day and to pick out points during the day when you felt at peace or genuinely glad because of an interaction with someone else. forming a strong relationship with god, close friends, and family are characteristic of a life-well lived. these relationships help the person stay grounded when they are moving through troubled times. embracing humanity means to reach out to your community, beginning with family and extending it to friends and others, to see what their needs are. acting courageously means holding the above qualities and values in your heart and speaking out when you see injustice or exclusion within a community. the mission statement stated above will help keep me centered in my faith and the important values i hold. during all the stress and chaos school brings, i will continue to rely on my family for help and lean on my friends for support. i will try to find “an empty space, a pause” during my day to be thankful for the great community i have formed while at notre dame (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). i also https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ will hold the value of inclusiveness during my remaining years at notre dame and beyond. this aspect will be seen through me encountering and having open conversations with those who follow a different religion than i do. this sentiment of inclusivity and its importance is highlighted at notre dame through father hesburgh and the legacy he left for us to continue to grow upon (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). keeping all these ideals in mind, i will remember to live my life each day as if it were my last so that i am not wasting my time and gifts. this sentiment stems from sister alethia and the idea of “momento mori” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). living like this for the rest of my time at notre dame and beyond will help me to appreciate my community even more than i already do. during my time at notre dame, i will reflect on what i am passionate about. this will stem from reflecting on what career i want to pursue after leaving notre dame. i will continue to reflect on questions such as “what does the world need you to be” so that i am keeping others in mind to make my decisions selflessly (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). when talking to my friends about each other’s values and how we perceive each other, i realize how important community is to me and that i need to be more available for my friends whenever they are struggling over the next few years (“week five discernment conversation activity” from moreau – moreau fye week five). i will practice reflecting on my life by using different techniques such as taking a “body scan” or coming into a state of “meditative or contemplative prayer” (“ways to practice mindfulness” from mcdonald center for student well-being – moreau fye week six). using these different techniques, i will be able to better reflect on how my actions affect others and https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit where i am able to end my day feeling happy about my actions or come up with ways for how i can improve my interactions with other people the next day. my role model for a well-lived life will be father gregory boyle because his actions and help extended to a great, marginalized community which no one had reached out to before (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week seven). he is a very faithful man who believes in god and places a great amount of trust in what god has planned. from his excerpt, i can tell he has formed a strong and safe community around him which challenges him and helps him to grow. i believe that if father boyle was tasked to write his own eulogy, he would be able to write a statement about the importance of community and how it has impacted his life (“integration three” from moreau – moreau fye week eight). a community is there to help you through troubled times and “accompany” you on the road ahead (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). i will live out this aspect of my mission statement by reaching out to those who i believe need more community in their lives to make them feel more comfortable while at notre dame. notre dame and the values it holds as an institution such as “the spirit of inclusion” will help me keep me aligned with my values stated above (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame – moreau fye week ten). i will only be able to hold these beliefs and values if i am challenged about my reasons behind holding them. this can be accomplished by continuing to have open conversations with those i will encounter over my time at notre dame. this means that i will not be caught in an “echo chamber” and i can grow deeper in my beliefs or rethink them as i encounter these types of conversations (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau week eleven). i will also be courageous during my time at notre dame to stand up when i see injustice https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s and when i can speak against it. this courageous spirit branches from dean g. marcus cole who used his position to make a concrete statement on what we can do as a community to stop what happened to george floyd from taking place in the future (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). this act took a lot of courage because it is a sensitive topic in society right now but one that needs to be discussed. my mission statement above encapsulates all my important values which i will grow on and develop over the next three years (“complete: writing a personal mission statement activity” by moreau – moreau fye week thirteen). in conclusion, i will live out my mission statement every day for the rest of my time at notre dame by being true to my values of my faith and community and looking towards strong individuals for support to spearhead my own causes in the future. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit semester 4 integration moreau mr. oswald 29 april 2022 integration 4 my first year at notre dame has been a time of new transitions, minor setbacks, and tremendous growth. coming from living at home with the safety of my family to help guide me through things, i’ve had to learn how to manage life on my own at notre dame and discover new things about myself. being surrounded by so many new perspectives and loads of opportunities has shown me where my values align and where i want to head in life. throughout this past semester, moreau has especially aided me in this, as the assignments have helped me explore a variety of my personal beliefs and goals in life. the experience of developing these beliefs and goals has helped me form my personal mission statement; i believe my mission is to pursue a job that will fulfill me through helping others, to prioritize being empathetic and compassionate towards others, and to ensure the inclusion of people who are different. various moreau activities have helped me explore the career path i want to pursue, and i have found that i want to become an education lawyer so that i can help students reach their full potential. the “navigating your career journey” article explained, “career satisfaction depended in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by murelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). the main experience that has contributed to my interest in becoming an education lawyer was working as a teaching assistant at a special education summer school every summer of high https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ school. my older brother, aidan, had attended the school as a child, and it helped him develop communication skills, knowledge of reading and writing, and excitement about attending school. as a teaching assistant, i helped to promote each of these same skills, helping students communicate their desires and worries, reading stories to them, assisting them in writing creative narratives, and creating friendships between students and their peers. it was incredibly rewarding seeing the way they went from dreading the idea of coming back to school the next morning to looking forward to seeing their friends and learning new topics in the classroom. in a documentary about fr. hesburgh, it stated, “he recognized that we all had a duty to serve and give back to the greater global community” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christian o’malley moreau fye week two). this experience helped me discover my purpose of becoming an education lawyer, where i could defend students to ensure they’re gaining access to an equitable and fulfilling education. being able to pursue a job that would not only fulfill me but also contribute to the betterment of society, helps bring meaning to my life. at notre dame, i’m working towards becoming an education lawyer by pursuing classes and activities that align with that career. for example, i took a class called the “school to prison pipeline” that educated me about the disparities in the education system. i hope to continue with classes such as these so i can excel as an education lawyer. during a conversation i had with my mom, my mom stated, “things come naturally to you when you’re passionate about them” (conversation with my mother moreau fye week five). i’m passionate about helping students reach their full potential, and doing this as a job would allow me to feel fulfilled in my career and life. however, i don’t just want to help others through my job, i also hope to exhibit empathy and compassion for people in my daily life. one of the lessons that my mom emphasized to me growing up is that “you never know what someone is going through until you put yourself in https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143021 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dpc4m1i0-ia4t7rknf0-bsgjlymtoadjsixcxv2x8h8/edit?usp=sharingfile:///users/sophievalencia/downloads/qqc%20week%205%20(1).pdf https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dpc4m1i0-ia4t7rknf0-bsgjlymtoadjsixcxv2x8h8/edit?usp=sharingfile:///users/sophievalencia/downloads/qqc%20week%205%20(1).pdf their shoes.” she has taught me that it’s always important to be compassionate towards others because every person has pain in their life. his holiness pope francis explained, “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people. and often there is this habit, by people who call themselves "respectable," of not taking care of the others, thus leaving behind thousands of human beings, or entire populations, on the side of the road” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). i believe it’s integral to prioritize people because that’s what ensures the well-being of society. material things such as money and material items are never as valuable as the happiness of others. this is also why i believe it’s more important to donate than acquire money, as hoarding money will do nothing to help others. i agree with fr. michael hilmes, “the crown and summit of the whole of ethical life is what he calls caritas (charity), what the new testament describes as agape (self-gift)” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i want to be someone who shows this empathy through my little interactions with others. one way i’ve done this at notre dame is by singing at different prayer services and memorial masses that hold significance to people. music often brings joy to people’s lives and helps them endure the pain they’re going through. singing has been a way i’ve shown compassion to others. additionally, many of my best memories are when people accompanied me through difficult times, and i want to do the same for others. reifenburg recounted a memory, “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well” (“the teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenburg moreau fye week nine). one of the memories that hold the most significance to reifenburg from his mission trip https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://www.studocu.com/en-us/document/university-of-san-diego/general-chemistry-i/three-key-questions-practice/22313725 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing was a period when the citizens accompanied him through sickness. helping a person never fails to leave an impact on them, and i believe this is what causes the progression of society. i want to show empathy and compassion to others like the citizens of the village did to ensure the well-being of my loved ones and community. to ensure the well-being of my community, i also believe it’s important to include everyone, especially those who are different. the congregation of the holy cross believes, “all of us are involved in the mission… as a single brotherhood are joined in one communal response to the lord’s mission” (“constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross” by the congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week twelve). no matter our differences, we are all still a single brotherhood and we have the moral obligation to ensure each person feels loved and valued in society. a good example of showing inclusiveness is being courteous when you disagree with someone. paul blaschko stated, “we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree which is accelerating political polarization” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). it’s important to see how this political polarization is causing exclusion and to limit this exclusion by being respectful towards everyone. i believe it’s necessary to use the abilities that you have to promote this type of inclusion. after becoming paralyzed from an accident, j.d. kim discussed, “i realize that what i (can) do (is) a blessing” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto magazine moreau fye week six). in my case, i feel included in society, and therefore, it’s a blessing that i can help others feel included. additionally, i want to center myself by “observing an “internet sabbath” every week” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico eyer, ted moreau fye week one). i believe that if i’m not distracted by technology, i can center my focus on promoting inclusion. notre dame has helped ingrain this value in me as well, “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji3pyemgglw https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ flows from our character as a community of scholarship, teaching, learning, and service founded upon jesus christ.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). one way that i’ve done spread inclusivity at notre dame is by joining the best buddies club which works to create friendships between individuals with and without disabilities. i’ve formed many friendships through the club and have seen the impact that feeling included can have on a person’s happiness. as i stated in my week 13 mission statement, “it is our responsibility to ensure that we cultivate a world that is loving and accepting of all people, and we can do this by educating ourselves and others about the blessing of inclusivity. ” ( (“mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). overall, to live a life well-lived, i believe my mission is to pursue a job that will fulfill me through helping others, to prioritize being empathetic and compassionate towards others, and to ensure the inclusion of people who are different. pursuing education law will help me ensure students can reach their full potential, being empathetic and compassionate towards others will ensure the well-being of my loved ones and community, and encouraging inclusion will contribute to the betterment of society. my experiences during my first year at notre dame and in moreau have helped me consolidate my beliefs and what i want to do with my life. i hope to continue striving toward these goals so that i can feel fulfilled in my life. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/10tnhd5hhot7af-co8zsqrx36w9j3bwtwtbyrxphrsls/edit?usp=sharing embracing life and what it can teach you embracing life and what it can teach you living a life that is worth remembering is something everyone strives for. it is no coincidence god put us on this earth. he had a specific plan for every person, and it is our job to fulfill his will. this is something kendall believed in. she knew you never get time back, and you have to live each day to the fullest. not many things are certain in this world, but one thing that is unavoidable, is death. some people fear oblivion, scared of what is beyond and when their time will come. however, sister altheia believed, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fys week three). the end is something kendall embraced, as it brought her closer to eternity in heaven. kendall’s life was one well-lived, and we can all learn from her experiences and advice. in our world of constant motion, kendall thought this was the opposite of what we should be doing. “the point of sitting still is it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fys week one). she firmly believed that being constantly on the move was detrimental in trying to live a good life. taking the time to relax and reflect on yourself is essential in life. doing so everyday makes a huge difference in how you perform daily tasks and interact with others. happiness is key. you must focus on your own happiness so others can be happy too. life is not always easy. sometimes it throws problems at you, and it is a testament to yourself how well you deal with them. father hesburgh once said, “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering…” (“hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fys week two). this is something that really stuck to kendall in her life. she was a firm believer in learning from your own struggles. she embraced hardship because she knew it would only make https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 her a better person. a life well-lived is one with rewards. if you were to never have a problem a day of your life, your successes would not mean anything. the reward of succeeding after you have failed and made mistakes is a beautiful thing. the knowledge you gain from this lesson is worth more than a perfect life could ever be. in a conversation with her father, kendall received insight on how to live a better life. he gave her many good tips, but something that stuck out to her was, “always be true to yourself” (“discernment conversation activity” by bob burgess moreau fys week five). when she was younger, kendall cared too much about the opinions of others. she would act like a different person around others because she was afraid of being judged if she didn’t agree with something. she quickly realized this was not a way to live a good life. she took her father’s words and decided she would live based on what she believed. she would do what made her happy and she wouldn’t worry about being someone else. another important lesson kendall learned was in choosing a career. “...career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fys week four). when she was in college, she had no idea what she wanted to do with her life. she didn’t know if she should choose her career based on money, or if she should pick something she would genuinely enjoy. she decided to go with the latter, and she never looked back. she reflected on what it was she believed in, and realized she wanted to help people. with this in mind, she decided to become a psychologist, where she helped many people throughout her lifetime. she believed this was an important aspect in living a good life. no one should be in a job they hate because if they are, then they will only be unhappy for as long as they live. https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ something else kendall learned is that we have to be aware of how our presence affects others. “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fys week six). in order to achieve a life well-lived, we cannot be selfish and only care about ourselves. we must love our neighbors, check on them, and genuinely take interest in their lives. if you do not do this, then you are only hurting yourself. no one wants to be friends with a selfish person. this is why it is important because if you help others, you will fill your life with people who understand and care for you. “…life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fys week seven). this is a large component to a good life. if you experience this world alone, then you are wasting your time. kendall filled her life with friends, and they cared about each other. she found genuine friends who made her laugh, cry, and everything in between. one thing kendall always wanted was to share her life experiences and the lessons she had learned along the way. this is why i am speaking today. her life is one worth telling, and we can all take away valuable insight in how we, ourselves, can live our life better. kendall’s purpose in life was to help others, and she found genuine happiness and fulfillment. as i look out into the crowd today, i can see she succeeded in this purpose. everyone here has been affected by kendall’s kindness, and it is beautiful to see people come together in celebration of her well-lived life. it is saddening she is no longer with us, but she is now living her best life in heaven with our heavenly father. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis 12 april 2022 a dive into development my goal in life is to cultivate close relationships, create a foundation of truth and openness, and pursue meaning in life through intellectual curiosity in my everyday life. as a brother, son, and friend i believe that close relationships that are founded on truth, open communication, and concern for others are key to developing meaningful relationships that have a real impact on the day-to-day lives of myself and others. i believe that building strong relationships in which there is mutual respect and care for each other provides the foundation for all people to pursue deeper meaning in their lives through different avenues such as hobbies, service, and careers. furthermore, i believe that finding meaning through the everyday activities i do is crucial fulfillment of my own potential. i believe that a constant effort towards intellectual knowledge and close relationships with those around me is evidence of a life well-lived. one guiding principle that i strive to follow is, “to whom much is given, much is required”. i believe that the constant effort to take advantage of the opportunities by providing opportunities for others is an ongoing process that is part of the greater good of life. ultimately, the pursuit of the continual struggle for deeper connections with others, truth, openness, and intellectual curiosity is what roots a life well-lived (moreau week 13). in week one, i focused on how i could learn to self-reflect in order to better understand myself. i think this week was important for me because it helped me to define the things that were important to me and the things i could do in order to move closer to those things. one of the main things that i identified was that i believed it was important to “[place] limits on the newest technologies” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, moreau week 1). i found that by taking time off my screen i could focus on the things that really mattered. taking time away from technology allowed me to not only understand myself better but develop closer relationships with those around me. in week two, i focused on the importance of what i did in my free time. although i believe it is important to find meaning in our work, i also believe that it is equally important to find meaning in the things that we enjoy in our free time. although for (name of author) she found meaning through “back to her community through volunteerism”, i have found recently that spending time with family and giving back is where i can find purpose and fulfillment in my life ( domer dozen by tia paullette, moreau week 2). during week three i took time to focus on what core values matter in a life well-lived. in a way, by identifying these values, i was able to identify goals for myself. identifying the values that are important to me, made it easier to choose the people i wanted to surround myself with, the things i did, and who i wanted to become in the future. one of the things that resonated with me this week was a quotation from sister teresa that said “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham, moreau week 3). this focus on death helped me to identify one of my core values of making the most of the time we have. in week four i focused on the importance of curiosity in my life. since i was little, curiosity and learning more about the things around me have always influenced how i approached the school and the other activities i did. however, during this week i reflected on how i could turn my curiosity inward. one of the quotations that i focused on this week was “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”(navigating your career journey moreau week 4). i learned that learning more about myself, and the things that are important to me was also essential to a meaningful life. the more i understand myself, the better i can guide myself toward the things that are important to me. during week five, i mainly focused on the importance of self-improvement. during the interview with my mother, i discovered some of the limitations that self-reflection could have due to our inability to recognize certain behaviors. when talking about self-improvement with my mom i focused on the question “what is something hard to say, but something that i need to hear?” (discerning a life well lived moreau week 5). something that i realized i needed to be more cognizant of was my tendency to be unforgiving and push others away. although i learned that this was something that i needed to work on, i realized that self-improvement could not only come from self-reflection alone and that allowing myself to self-reflect with others was also very beneficial. in week six, i focused on how to think about self-reflection and improvement in the right way. i learned that “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich, moreau week 6). rather than only focusing on why we felt certain things, it is important to simply focus on what we are feeling in order to properly address these things. if we only ask “why” questions self-reflection has the potential to do more harm than good as we begin to blame ourselves. in week seven i focused on the importance of building meaningful relationships that extend past the superficial. one of the quotations that i focused on this week was “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and every single component” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis, moreau week 7). i think the important thing i took away from this week was that strong relationships were key to supporting my happiness. related to my focus in week seven, in week nine i reflected on how i could positively respond to suffering. one of the key insights that i drew from this week was that “children can be incredibly resilient, especially when given structure and love” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg, moreau week 9). . when we have a network of meaningful relationships to support us, it allows us to respond more effectively to times of adversity. when we know we can depend on others, it allows us to have a more positive outlook during times of struggle. although i spent a lot of time reflecting on the importance of relationships, in week ten, i focussed on the importance of self-acceptance. one of the main quotations that stood out to me was “you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, moreau week 10). without a basis in self-acceptance, it can make your relationships with others very difficult. the key to healthy relationships is the ability to be comfortable with yourself. in week eleven i focused on my value of intellectual curiosity and the things that limited my ability to explore different opinions. the quotation that stood out to me during this week was “if you're online or, you know, only talking about politics to the people who are exactly like you, there's no point of thinking of a person on the other political party” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh, moreau week 11). i thought it was really interesting how echo chambers significantly limited our ability to recognize the other side. as someone who wants to continually learn, i realized that it is important to find groups of people who disagree with me in order to expose myself to new opinions and perspectives. lastly, in week twelve i focused on the unconscious biases that existed in my own life. one of the comments from martin luther king jr. that drew my attention was “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other" (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus, moreau week 12). i think this quotation was particularly important for me because i come very homogeneous background. i think it is important for me to recognize that many of my biases stem from a lack of communication with people with different experiences and perspectives. capstone integration matthew daly moreau fye 29 april 2022 how do i pursue a life well lived? when i first entered carroll hall, my dorm at notre dame, i was a little intimidated by all the new people and the fact that my life would instantly change. i now had a new home, and a community around me which i would have to find a place in. being one of the smallest dorms on campus, living at carroll gave me a unique opportunity to really get to know all the residents, from the rector to my fellow first years. from the basketball games to the many traditions of the dorm, became good friends with many different people, and felt like i was part of a community. of course there still are moments of conflict, which come from any large group of people living so closely, but for the most part everyone got along very well. this was my first time living for an extended time with non-relatives, and although i have only been a student for a few months, i feel as though i have truly become part of a community. college may only be a few years, but this experience has taught me the importance of community. the second half of moreau first year experience brought a number of different ideas ranging through all sorts of topics to my mind. among them are the ways we should view and interpret our community, find healing over the stresses and traumas of our pasts, and view the christian faith. i began this class as a new freshman on campus, and though this is still my first year i have grown a lot along the way, and found out more of what it means to be at notre dame. as such, a lot of the documents analyzed for this class had particular importance to me. with them i have altered my way of thinking for what i believe is better. a philosopher who first introduced him to this concept explained how recent advances have diminished the ability of someone to find a safe haven from the stresses of the world (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). technology, which has intruded into everyone’s life, now puts a functionally infinite amount of information within our reach and has greatly increased our connectedness with each other. as such, more than ever we need to figure out how to filter through this information to live in tranquility. as humans, our intelligence has brought us the ability to build rockets, create art, and establish vast civilizations. yet it is no secret that intelligence has also made many of us unhappy. our desire to find solutions and patterns in everything we come across has led us to dead ends on larger questions such as the meaning to life and how the universe came to be questions which very likely may never be answered. moreover, technology has served to add serious distractions and stresses to our lives that simply did not exist in the past. one moreau document looked at how recent technical advances have diminished the ability of someone to find a “safe haven from the stresses of the world and a secular sabbath to combat complication” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). what is most important to people is the desire to find a purpose. it is clear that many people indeed are struggling to find happiness because of the lack of clarity in our lives. taking time to meditate each day in a sort of secular sabbath is a practice i will use to help find happiness. at notre dame i learned about mary kate battle, a nominee for the domer dozen (a university alumni award) who used her engineering degree to “teach children in the congo how program, so that they could advance their country and economy” (“domer dozen nominees” by nd alumni association moreau fye week two). her work in parts of uganda and jordan allowed her to continue on her mission to spread technical knowledge in the third world. these kind of people are extremely inspiring to me, and i hope to use my computer science degree after graduation to teach technical skills in developing countries. i believe that charity is the most important part of a life well lived, and believe that remembering one’s mortality will help them stay on track to achieve it. an article by new york times writer ruth graham detailed how a convent nun was “trying to remind people of their mortality in order for them to better plan their lives to be meaningful and spiritual” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die”, by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). even non-catholics should understand the validity of this nun’s mission, as avoiding the idea of death is simply cheating one out of accomplishing their dreams. a big part of moreau this semester was the concept of career discernment. as college students, the relevancy of our future careers is obvious there only will be a few years until we enter the workforce, and our decisions now play a major role in determining where we will end up. the first part of understanding where we would fit best in the workforce is understanding ourselves, so our whole class was tasked with asking a peer about our own selves (“week five discernment conversation activity” by nd moreau moreau fye week 5). another's perspective is often more telling than one’s own, and during this activity i learned about two traits i never considered myself of having: being innovative and adventurous. with this valuable perspective, i will begin to determine where i want to go from here, and will use a decision making process not unlike that brought up by the notre dame first year educators. they believe that when making an important life decision one should look at a problem from every angle, and balance the benefits and detriments (“navigating your career journey” by nd moreau moreau fye week 4). this helps one to come up with an unbiased answer, and is especially helpful for hard and binding decisions. jd kim, a young man with dreams of becoming a chef and to explore the world was “ left paralized after a snowboarding accident” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week 6). despite this terrible misfortune, and the period of depression that followed, he eventually found a new path to living a good life. this event is a real reminder that our dreams can be washed away in the blink of an eye, and that hardship is inevitable. what is important is one’s resolve to constantly strive to better themselves. when i read the excerpt from jurisdiction i got a look into the economic struggles of a latino community in la and how “street violence stemmed from feelings of anger and vulnerability” (“jurisdiction” by gregory boyle, moreau fye week 7). the truth is people everywhere have their own struggles and sometimes need help from others. the work the priest did in this story to help the community reminded me of the idea of accompaniment brought up in a memoir of an nd graduate’s work in poor areas of chile. “to truly help i needed to learn to accompany”, (“teaching accompaniment” by steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). he saw that the children growing up in chile needed positive role models and a space to be themselves, but underestimated how difficult providing this support would be. after years of work reifenberg came to realize that accompaniment, not mentorship, was the key to helping others. this meant learning from each other's experiences and working together to create change. i hope to incorporate this kind of relationship throughout my time at notre dame and beyond. a big issue in today's society is race. many of the groups i am a part of catholicism, american society fail to be completely inclusive to all people. as robin diangelo wrote, white americans tend to believe that “if we are against racism and unaware of committing racist acts, we can’t be racist…” (“why it's so hard to talk to white people about race” by robin diangelo, moreau fye week 10). in truth, however, we must seek to understand race and acknowledge how it could have impacted one’s background up to that point to be anti-racist. i will try to work towards fulfilling this role in all groups i am a part of. this is supported by a video we later watched, on the harm of political bubbles in our real life and online lives. according to the speaker, "one is encouraged to add friends who share similar beliefs, and this puts people in a bubble" (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blashko, moreau fye week 11). too often we avoid information that goes against our own preconceptions, especially when it comes to difficult issues. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states.” (“i am george floyd. except i can breath, and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole, norway fye week 12). although it is easy for us to look into the errors of the past, like slavery, segregation, and the george floyd incident, we need to remember that even today there are big issues that are still going to play out. overall there is a lot of work i still need to do before i can accomplish my mission, and that is why i am glad i got to write a mission statement. after reviewing the notre dame mission, i (“university of notre dame mission statement”, notre dame, week 13). i took some of their statements, such as the need to follow one’s faith and stay true to their values, and added a few of my own. writing down a mission statement is an act that really helps cement what one wants to accomplish, and i would recommend it to all. integration 3 eulogy-integration 3 i want to first express my overwhelming gratitude and extend a thank you to all of the relatives and friends in attendance today, and to everyone who has come together to honor sabrina. i know that she loved each and every one of you, and would be absolutely honored to see you all gathered here today. in her lifetime, sabrina assumed a variety of roles in relation to us all: a daughter, a sister, a granddaughter, a cousin, a friend, or she may have even been a stranger. for those of you who were not able to become close with sabrina during her short lifetime, i hope to give you some insight into who she was, and how she lived her life. when pondering what i should say about her, i decided that the best way to encompass her life would be by explaining some of how she defined a life well-lived. the thing i think she would want to stay with you the most, was that, in the words of pope francis, her “life flow[ed] through [her] relations with others,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). both she and pope francis shared the belief that when we realize that the material things, the achievements we may have, or the accolades we may receive mean much less than the way we treat our brothers and sisters, we can begin to find meaning in our lives. sabrina truly believed, which she strived to reflect in how she treated those around her, that when all is said and done, no one will remember what kind of car you drove, or the shoes you wore, or the gpa you graduated with, but they will remember your kindness and the way you treated others. so, in honor of her, let’s focus today on the way she strived to treat those around her and the meaningful relationships she held, rather than focusing on any achievements she may have had. i know that she would place her relationship with anyone of you much higher than anything she may have accomplished. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript though she lived through her relationships with all of you, something she struggled with throughout her life was slowing down, and taking a step back from her school work. speaking from experience, living on a campus where many things are fast paced and competitive, can sometimes engulf you. interestingly enough, i believe the hard work and perseverance that she demonstrated was rooted in her love for those around her. she wanted to be successful so that her family and friends would be proud, so that her family wouldn’t ever have to struggle financially, and so that she could be proud of something at the end of the day. though she worked hard, she understood that, “the more time [she] spent away from the work, the better that work [would] be,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico ivermoreau fye week one). this “break time” would most definitely be attributed to her frequent starbucks trips, taken with her friends at notre dame. she valued her time away from her work much more than her time doing it. take this as an inspiration to spend more time focusing on family and friends. sabrina strived to make her work an afterthought. another thing i feel is worth mentioning is that sabrina refused to be defined under one simple term, much like one of her inspirations, father hesburgh. from working closely with the president in tackling segregation to expanding one of the nations top universities, hesburgh touched the lives of millions (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two). father hesburgh’s life truly showed that we do not have to be confined to our job description. despite being notre dame’s president, he reached beyond the confines of his career and did something more. sabrina was a musician, an actress, a hopeful businesswoman, a student leader, and so much more. she was interested in anything, and wanted to do everything. father hesburgh showed her that this was possible; he showed her she didn’t have to choose one thing to try really hard at. she was an inspired woman. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143021 in the words of sister altheia noble, “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week three). sister altheia wants us to remember that we will die; sabrina’s life is an example of why this way of “immortality thinking” is detrimental. in honor of sabrina, we should consider sister aletheia's beliefs about death, we should not be afraid of it and rather ponder it. knowing that something will not last forever encourages us to value it that much more, and in light of our current tragic situation we should value our lives with everything we have. we all know that life is short, and can be taken away at any moment. because of this, sabrina tried not to take this life thing too seriously. she believed that, too much “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week six). she always talked about how introspection oftens leads us to pondering the past instead of looking ahead. she believed that the past can shape us, but only the future has the ability to change us. at the time of her death, though she had minors picked out, sabrina was still undecided in her primary college major. this was mostly because of the fact that she believed that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a ‘best major for you.’” (“navigating your career journey” by meroulo family career centermoreau fye week four). sabrina was never one to take the easy way out, or pick the major with the best salary. she believed in the fact that if you work a job you love, you’ll never truly work a day in your life. that is what she wanted for her life, and to her friends still in college, i think she would want you to pick the major that makes you happy. not the major that will make your parents happy, or fill your bank account. she believed that happiness was greater than money. sabrina once told me that “despite the https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143076 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143076 uncertainty in regards to my major, i am remaining hopeful; i have a feeling that i will end up working a job that's right for me.” i wish she was able to live out that dream. i'll end with this. a conversation with her father, sabrina’s unofficial life coach, revealed that she always strived for excellence, in everything that she did (career conversationmoreau fye week five). sabrina’s drive and motivation to be someone great, inside and outside of the classroom, was truly something. though she cannot be here with us today, i know she wants you all to know that she loves you very much. she would not want her passing to place a hold on any of your lives. so, get out there, and live the life she would want you to live. live in honor of her. thank you. integration 3 megan mcnelis tony polotto moreau first year experience march 4, 2022 a canvas to remember we have come here today to celebrate the life of our friend megan who passed away with love in her heart. today as we reflect on megan’s life, we can reflect on death and the importance of living a life well lived—a life megan constantly strove for. and in the end, a life i think she found. a life based around her faith and morals, and lived with those she loved. megan was one to always remind us to take a step back, and appreciate what we have. she constantly was a reminder of the importance of finding beauty in our lives, even when we are bombarded with chaos from daily life. in the article, why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer writes that, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). throughout her life, i saw megan appreciate the canvas of her life, but also the canvas of those she loved. she found the beauty in each one of us, even when it was hard for us to see ourselves. today as we sit here, all connected by our love for megan, i think we should appreciate the canvas of megan’s life. the bright colors that we saw through her smile and the beauty of each stroke–purposeful or not. each piece of her canvas comes together for a breathtaking canvas—a canvas that can only represent a bold, vibrant, and beautiful life. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/navigate-life/health-and-wellness/letting-go-of-expectations/?utm_source=fall_2021&utm_medium=class&utm_id=moreau megan’s life was one defined by her trust in others. she would not let one of us struggle alone and ensure that we worked together hand-in-hand. she believed that any problem tackled with someone you love was possible to overcome. she saw the strength in each of us, and in return we were inspired to show her the strength she embodied. megan once told me the story about when fr. hesburgh put two men who at the surface would not seem they would get along– a black lawyer and a southern conservative–together on a boat. and, after one fishing trip they were able to understand one another more fully and work together for the greater good. in the end, the two men just needed to see each other as human beings with different opinions. fr. hesburgh’s inspired idea, that civil discourse and respectful dialogue promote relationships that open new doors of possibility. ( "hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week two). megan was truly willing to jump into a boat with anyone. she listened, learned, and understood each of us–even when she disagreed with our opinions. no matter, her trust in others allowed her to overcome the control of judgements and assumptions that control so many. fr. michael himes once wrote, “we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we all can possibly be!” ( "three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). megan pushed herself to do just this. she was inspired to use the gifts god gave her, to give back to her communities, her family, and her friends. as we remember megan’s life and we look at her canvas, i see passionate streaks of courage. i see the bold colors of her imagination. i adore the straight lines that remind me of her always responsible advice. the complexities in her canvas call to mind the thought she put into her words and her actions. and the warm colors remind me of the love she could convey with one squeeze of the hand and a smile in her eyes. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/146887 megan was one who would say she never really knew what she wanted to do with her life. but, we know that in every job she took on a whim she would “consider all four aspects values, interests, personality, and skills” ( "navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). she valued giving back to the community that supported her throughout her life–such as her catholic elementary school. she was interested in a range of topics, from engineering to service to traveling around the world. her personality was one that craved personable communication with others and sparking joy in those around her. and she worked hard at perfecting her skills in whichever job she had at the moment. her interests varied, took her to many different places and allowed her to bring inspiration wherever she went. we know that megan desired to have a purpose that serves the needs of others in a community. she valued hard-work and appreciation for life. we saw her doing her best when she was motivated by the idea that my actions will be of help to others. ( "week five discernment conversation activity”moreau fye week five). these are all testaments to her love for those in her life and those she knew could help. megan understood that, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” ( “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”, by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). instead she would turn to her faith or service to reset and find herself when she started to feel lost. she was always motivated to find where she could be of help to others, instead of looking at all the ways in which she needed help. no matter the day, megan had the ability to make us feel loved and accepted. she understood our troubles and didn’t judge our mistakes. she brought love to our hearts and https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/147135 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/147135 inspired in us peace of mind. and happiness fills my soul by recognizing that megan is now “in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love”, and i find peace in the knowledge that she has “wandered into god’s own ‘jurisdiction’” ( "chapter 8: jurisdiction, tattoos on the heart", by fr. greg boyle, s.j., – moreau fye week seven). as we mourn here together, we can be comforted by the fact that megan is wrapped in god’s arm and surrounded by her family and friends who have passed before her. today, let us reflect on the canvas that was megan’s life. one that was full of love, inspiration, and joy. and as i reflect, i know that megan’s life was one that was well-lived. and the canvas of her life surely reflects that. integration three santoso 1 dr. lassen moreau fye section 17 4 march, 2022 integration three: eulogy sophia was the very essence of compassion, courage, and passion. one thing that inspired me was her ability to empathize with others. in every interaction she had with others, she was genuine and kind. she asked about the experiences of others, genuinely desiring to learn from and about other people. her words and actions made a difference in the lives of others. she was humble and kind, always willing to acknowledge her faults, mistakes, and limitations to knowledge. sophia cared—about her family, friends, and strangers. through her words and her actions, she made those around her better people. sophia strived to become a better person through her faith. she always remembered to set the time aside for prayer and reflection. as pico iyer stated, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (iyer why we need to slow down in our lives moreau fye week one). she recognized the need for reflection to improve herself, identify goals, find direction in her life, and ultimately find answers. this inspired those around her to also set aside time to reflect upon their decisions, which brought a great deal of meaning into their experiences. sophia found happiness in learning from those around her. her parents were her biggest role models. they taught her to be kind, hardworking, humble, and strong. from her parents, she learned the importance of family and that she could achieve anything in life with determination and compassion. sophia saw the good in everyone. she recognized that everyone has something https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ santoso 2 to offer—that she could learn from anyone and any experience. sophia acknowledged that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (navigating your career journey moreau fye course moreau fye week four). she viewed every experience as an opportunity to learn and grow. sophia was a bright presence, in both her optimism and wisdom. she demonstrated the importance of having a positive mindset during difficult times. she managed to be there for others even when she herself was facing challenges. she taught others, through her words and her actions, to be defined by her responses to challenges that arise, rather than the obstacles themselves. she lived her life with extraordinary resilience. her actions reflected the story of dr. jihoon kim, who manifested strong faith and hope when he faced paralysis, an unimaginable challenge (5 minutes dr. jihoon kim moreau fye week six). sophia was always focused on what she can already do when faced with a challenge and used those capabilities to help herself and others. she inspired those around her to never give up in the face of adversity. she pushed us to recognize the amount of control we have over our lives through our choices. sophia had an inspirable amount of courage. she had courage to stand up for what she believed in, and she had the courage be seen as who she truly was. similar to father hesburgh, who refused to censor information on religious liberty due to his strong beliefs in education, sophia always followed her values (hesburgh jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). her integrity and consistency with her values inspired those around her. sophia lived her life with a purpose. those who knew her would agree that she always put others before herself (discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week five). she found joy and satisfaction through her profession. improving the lives of others motivated her to go to work every morning. when she was not working and spending time with her family, she https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 santoso 3 enjoyed working with many philanthropic organizations. she remembered those in need and made an effort to serve her community. as his holiness pope francies stated, “how wonderful would it be if solidarity, this beautiful, and at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic, and scientific choices” (why the only future worth building includes everyone his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). sophia followed the words of pope francis by considering how her choices could impact others, instead of simply thinking about herself. sophia believed that integrating others into her daily life made living more worthwhile. sophia lived her life as if each day was her last. she was grateful to god for every day she had to live. it was inspiring to see her find blessings in everything, even negative experiences, which she believed were opportunities for her to grow personally. she lived her life with a sense of urgency, knowing that she may not be able to accomplish something important to her tomorrow. she lived her life to the fullest, following carefully the words of sister athelia: “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (sister alethia "meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die'' moreau fye week three). sophia taught all of us to never take anything for granted. as we celebrate her life, i hope that we can all learn to live our lives with the same compassion, courage, and passion that sophia did. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week 8 integration three blouch in media res dear awesome future-self, i don’t really know when you’ll be reading this. how’s the future? i declared my major last tuesday, and even though i felt so sure before, i still doubted myself after i made it official. i know that there is no “correct” choice, that “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you,’” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) and i tried to find that for myself. you’ll know how it all turned out, and i hope you’ll be more sure of the decision than i am. i question most of the decisions i make. beyond that, i question a lot of what i do too, which at times makes it seem easier to do nothing at all. it’s habitual at this point; my thoughts start cycling without me even realizing it. it’s difficult to counter those doubts, and to push through them, but it’s something that i’m going to work on so it’s easier for you to make decisions and stand by them. when i asked my parents the questions from the week 5 material, i avoided the most difficult one: “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). after some reflection, i want to answer that for myself because the answer is why i didn’t ask it originally; i struggle with self-esteem and i care too much about what people think of me. honestly, that took me a few minutes to type out, even though i knew what i wanted to write. hopefully, that answer is different for you, or at least less true. that truth has been sitting for a while, but already it’s less true than it was last semester. in a change of topic (but it will connect back later, i promise), i want to bring in a quote on self reflection: “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs,” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i want to remind you of the lgbtq+ retreat (which i attended this weekend) because you know how the grounding-effect of the retreat fades over time. on the retreat, i tried to ask myself https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ “what” i was feeling, rather than “why”, and it helped me discover a contradiction in what i was feeling. as you know, it’s scary to be honest about my pronouns, and that i’m nonbinary. if anything, that’s the part of myself i’m most sure about, but i still have doubts. it feels like there are so many people questioning me that it’s hard not to let that seep into how i view myself too. but at the retreat, that wasn’t something i had to worry about because i knew everyone would be accepting. and the more people that i share that with, the more people i’m honest with, the less scary it feels to tell someone new because i know that even if i lose that one person, i still have people who support me. i won’t be alone. that’s something i want to build for you, to be honest about who i am even though it’s terrifying to tell someone new. i’m going to do that, step by step, so you don’t have to be as afraid. the retreat was the first time in awhile that i didn’t do homework at all for one day. even though i feel overwhelmed and behind on work now because of all of my exams, i still don’t regret it. for one day, i set aside everything that was bothering me and just took time to reconnect with myself, which is something i rarely do: “as fast as geography is coming under our control, the clock is exerting more and more tyranny over us. and the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). with everything going on, it's so easy to lose sight of what matters, which is certainly not grades or homework or stressing over some awkward conversation two days ago. advice from a younger, less-wise you: if you haven’t taken a day to relax recently, do it. you need time to rest more than you need to fulfill whatever current assignment or obligation is going on, and it’ll still be there for you the next day. i think i’m self-centered, but in the worst way (hopefully you are less so, if i try to work on that); clearly, i don’t give myself enough time to take a break. additionally, when my anxiety kicks in i hyperfocus on myself and interactions with other people. i worry so much about the intentions of the other person (and usually am harsher to myself in my worrying) that i lose sight of my own intentions on how to treat them. even though it’s difficult for me and i’m not very good https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ at shifting my focus, the more that i think about intentionally treating other people with care and kindness, the less worried i am about what they think of me: “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). those two ideas, giving myself time to take breaks and recentering my focus on how i treat other people are very connected; i don’t think it’s possible to effectively do one without the other. i think it will take a long time to change my habits to do so, but i can start with small steps. this ended up being more of a reflection than a conversation with you, but maybe that’s still helpful in a different way, to look back on. i’m starting to form an idea of who i am now and who i want to be, and this captures a lot of it. at first, i was intimidated: “he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). when i first reflected on this quote, i felt like i could never be someone like that. i still don’t know if that will ever be true about me, but maybe it doesn’t have to be. if i start with small things, like how i treat other people, then who i am will start to align more with who i want to be. i didn’t want to write a eulogy for this assignment. as you know, i used to view death as a relief because i felt like i had nothing to live for. but even then, i started with small steps. i really wanted to watch the next episode of the show i liked. maybe i’m also a bit of a coward because i didn’t want the pain that comes with death, but there was always that one thing i wanted to experience, and eventually it became many things. and now, years past that, i don’t want to write a eulogy for myself: “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). i’m happy with my life, but not entirely with who i am now. a eulogy now, about who i am, wouldn’t line up with who i want to be, and i already know that about myself. maybe in addition to that, i https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143021 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?searchresultposition=1 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html?searchresultposition=1 don’t want to do good things to be remembered for them; i want to do good things because it’s right. i know that’s not the point of the eulogy, but that’s how it would feel. i’m scared of what someone would write about me in a eulogy because i’ve had walls up for so long. i don’t really care about most of the accomplishments i was praised for. i know i’m very flawed, and typically a eulogy only focuses on the good aspects of a person; i don’t want to be remembered as someone i’m not. so, future self, would the eulogy written about you be accurate? is it who you want to be? if not, that’s ok, there’s no judgment here. you don’t have to have everything figured out. you just have to try. however the future is going, try to focus on the small actions that are in line with who you want to be, even though it’s difficult. you don’t have to be perfect, but don’t be anyone other than yourself because that’s enough. capstone integration bossone 1 maria finan moreau 29 april 2022 this is me! for my mission statement, i wanted to organize it in a way that best conveyed the message that i wanted to share with others to describe myself. taking the advice of steven covey, i decided to divide up this mission statement by each of my values (week 13). one’s values and beliefs represent one’s goals, intentions, and hopes, so sharing my values and how i can use these values to further develop my own character within the next three years at notre dame is a perfect way to establish my mission. while these of course do not cover every value by which i live, i chose some that are the most ingrained within our moreau class this year. the following are the values that i chose: a strong sense of identity, inclusion and empathy, diversity of thought, patience, self-reflection, and devotion to the lives of others. the first value that has defined much of my life is a want for a strong sense of identity. discovering who i truly am is no easy task but i believe that it is necessary for me to live a truly fulfilling life. for the past year, i have struggled the most with two parts of my identity: my faith/spirituality and my sexual orientation. the struggle does not necessarily come from each part of my identity, but rather the way in which they can both exist in harmony with one another. as jacob walsh similarly explains in his piece bossone 2 “growing up gay and catholic,” i saw very few people around me who were going through a similar situation (week 10). i have had gay friends, but they were starkly against participating in any form of organized religion, especially catholicism and christianity. i have also had catholic “friends,” but they were straight and/or homophobic. it was one of the first times in my life when i felt unseen and alone in my experiences. however, since coming to notre dame, while homophobia is still prevalent, it is so refreshing to see more people here with whom i share this struggle. i hope in the next three years, i can strengthen this sense of identity that has been a point of confusion for multiple years. the second value i strive to live by is inclusion/empathy. i combined these two together because they can never be mutually exclusive; having empathy is necessary to be inclusive in your mission. as pope francis stated in a speech, “we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (week 7). as a person who wants to facilitate this building of the future, inclusion has to be at the heart of my work. if the work that i do does not include everyone, i will not view it as successful. even here at notre dame, as an american studies and peace studies major and gender studies minor, i get to study such a variety of experiences and cultures in our world. and for as much as notre dame still has so much work to do with inclusion and diversity, there are glimpses that make me proud to go here. for example, i was proud to see that a question about dean cole’s open letter was on notre dame’s application when i applied (week 12). it shows bossone 3 that at least notre dame is making an effort to include the experiences of those that are silenced in our world, and especially at a predominantly white institution. my third value is diversity of thought. this ties in nicely with my value of inclusion and empathy of others’ experiences and beliefs. honestly, this is something that i hope to improve in the next few years. i grew up in a place where everyone came from a nearly identical background, and it has taken some adjustment to fully embrace the new world of different perspectives here at college. i have often felt the need to correct or educate people who may think differently than me, but through my philosophy class and moreau in which we discussed epistemic bubbles, it is extremely difficult to change the beliefs of others. i would really love to think that i do not live in this bubble, but i have a feeling that naturally i might keep myself within it. through the next few years, i seek to create more diversity in the voices and beliefs around me. my fourth value is patience. i easily struggle with this the most, as i have struggled with ocd and perfectionism for multiple years now. while this can apply to me being patient with others as well, i think it mainly serves as a reminder to be patient with myself. pico iyer reminds us in his piece “why we need to slow down our lives” that it is the busiest people who need to take more breaks and be more patient with themselves. self care is something that i have always put on the backburner but i have experienced how self destructive that can be. for the next few years, i hope that i become more patient with myself. yet because of mental illness, i also have to be patient with myself about being patient with myself. i feel like there is a pressure to always work work work, but no one bossone 4 also talks about the pressure to take care of yourself. there are times where i physically and mentally refuse to prioritize self care, and it feels like i have no control. rather than forcing myself into a different lifestyle, i want to make sure i change my mentality at my own pace, so as not to put even more pressure on myself. my fifth value is self-reflection. this goes along the lines of patience, but is focused more on questioning who i want to be and what i want to do with my life. it is a question that we are asked from children: “what do you want to be when you grow up?” while it is a playful, well-intended question, it represents this societal pressure to always know where you want your life to go. however, i have learned that deep self-reflection can be such a helpful resource that i should take advantage of more often. within our moreau class, fr. michael himes’s “three key questions” have really helped me navigate not only what i want to do, but also lets me ponder my skills and how i can best harness them to help the world (week 3). speaking with others who i feel truly know me can also help me self-reflect more effectively (week 5). i hope to continue questioning myself and my future and take advantage of the resources that are available, especially the career center and other helpful resources directly on campus (week 4). lastly, my sixth value is my devotion to the lives of others. this is an overarching theme that i have made an effort to include in every area of my life, and it is a value that i hope will continue to be foundational in my professional efforts. at some point in my life, i want to become a professor so i can help a future generation of thinkers and innovators learn more about a world of peace. two articles from this moreau class have helped me bossone 5 question the way in which i interact with others, and have encouraged me to think more deeply about the benefits and consequences of the language that i use (week 6 and 9). not only do i want to live with a devotion to others but i also want to surround myself with similarly-driven people. i truly believe that an individual can make a difference in this world and someone that has inspired me in that sense is fr. ted (week 2). his work proves that my theory is correct: even though we live in a world of nearly eight billion people, one person’s dedication to demanding change in this world is powerful and ought not be ignored. bossone 6 works cited week 1: pico iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives” https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: hesburgh movie week 3: fr. michael himes, "three key questions" week 4: undergraduate career services, “navigating your career journey” https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 6: tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: pope francis, “why the only future worth building includes everyone” https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_buildi ng_includes_everyone/transcript fr. boyle, “tattoos on the heart” week 9: professor steve reifenberg, “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-r s30/edit week 10: jacob walsh, "growing up gay and catholic” https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay -and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 bossone 7 week 11: hidden brain media, “passion isn’t enough” https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ week 12: dean g. marcus cole, “i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can -breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ week 13: steven covey, “crafting your personal mission statement” https://www.jmu.edu/osarp/programs/mentor/mentors/missionstatementresources/missi on-creation-senge-covey.pdf https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.jmu.edu/osarp/programs/mentor/mentors/missionstatementresources/mission-creation-senge-covey.pdf https://www.jmu.edu/osarp/programs/mentor/mentors/missionstatementresources/mission-creation-senge-covey.pdf capstone integration moreau fye capstone integration 16 apr, 2022 four keys to a life well-lived as i embark on my journey at notre dame, i intend to focus my efforts on pursuing a life well-lived. to me, a life well-lived is one in which an individual feels that he or she has personally succeeded. i believe a life well-lived is devoted to the pursuit of one’s passions through education and beyond, developing wisdom and understanding, building meaningful relationships, and practicing self-reflection. together, the four aforementioned characteristics culminate in personal success and overall a well-lived life ( moreau fye week 13). through my studies, i am going to strive towards maintaining an open mind and dedicating myself to following my passions. my long term goal is to go to medical school and become a physician. in order to do this i must continue to push myself everyday, no matter the challenge. this is something that will not be easy, but as the meruelo family center for career development at notre dame states, “the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible,”(“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career moreau fye week four). i believe that a job in medicine will allow me to implement many fundamental beliefs, values, and standards. striving towards this passion will enable me to maximize my educational skills and use my individual strengths to better the community. in this way, i can truly maximize the education i have the fortune to receive at notre dame. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ in striving for this goal, it is of the utmost importance to keep my mind open to the fullest extent possible. i am fortunate to attend a university dedicated to helping students obtain a vast understanding of the world that surrounds them. father hesburgh once vowed that “the catholic university of the future will be a true, modern university,”(“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two) and it is my responsibility as a student to uphold the goals that hesburgh once set for notre dame students. hesburgh devoted himself to ensuring that we are exposed to a wide array of opinions and outlooks so that our education can truly flourish, and i intend to keep this devotion in my life after i graduate from the university of notre dame. in particular, as i progress through my studies as a student in the college of science, it will become increasingly feasible for me to seclude myself to only the information that i am actively being exposed to in rigorous science classes. this, however, will put me at a severe disadvantage with regard to skills and knowledge applicable in the humanities and life. developing a strong understanding of many topics and viewpoints apart from what i am actively exposed to or that i gravitate towards will be essential to becoming the best possible version of myself. similarly, philosophy professor at notre dame, dr. paul blashko, contends that, “..we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments,”(“ how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blashko moreau week eleven). intentionally submerging myself in novel sources will assist in my pursuit to see the world through other people’s shoes. in continuing my studies, i plan to make a strong effort to regularly expose myself to many sources of information so that i can be one step closer to pursuing a life well-lived. another important aspect of my next three years at notre dame is the relationships that i will establish with others. as a part of my personal mission, i want to always put forth effort into https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd building strong relationships with my peers. a large part of this resides in my desire to work towards relinquishing judgments that invade my thoughts. basic human nature makes it difficult for us to refrain from forming rash judgements. as a catholic, however, it is my responsibility to live out jesus’s name in everything that i do and think. in order to do this i must consistently remind myself that “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god,”(“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac moreau week ten). to live out god’s will for his children, i must always challenge myself to refrain from forming judgment and see life through the perspectives of those around me in addition to my own. if i can do this, i can continue in my journey towards living a life well-lived. similarly, it is important to recognize the equality that each of us exhibit due to our nature as children of god. the constitutions of the congregations of the holy cross, a congregation of missionary priests and brothers, remind us, “it is not that we take sides against sinful enemies; before the lord all of us are sinners and none is an enemy,”(“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregations of the holy cross moreau week twelve). god created each of us in his image and likeness, making us all of equal origin. as i continue to live out my mission statement and relinquish judgment from my relationships, it will be critical to remind myself that in god’s eyes, we are all equals, and should therefore treat everyone with uniform kindness and care, as he does. in this way, i can eliminate many of the judgments that occupy my thoughts. moreover, as i withdraw judgment from my mind and recognize the equality in humankind, i can begin to build stronger relationships with those around me. friendship has always been one of the things i value most in life. therefore, building strong connections with people is very important to me. i believe this stems from the numerous unfulfilling friendships https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ that i had to go through in high school to finally find meaningful ones that will last forever. peruvian philosopher, fr. gustavo guierrez, brings forth a good point on friendship, “..you must learn to be beside, walking with another person,”(“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by fr. gustavo guierrez moreau fye week nine). reciprocal friendship is a premier example of this. after experiencing many unbalanced friendships, i was able to recognize the difference that a reciprocated and genuine friendship makes in one's life. instead of working against each other, we can foster a greater good if we work together by encouraging and pushing each other to success. likewise, it is necessary to remember the concept of accordanceworking with one another as opposed to against each other. this idea of working in harmony with others is essential when building strong relationships because “the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us.’ we all need each other,”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). our independent growth will always be enhanced and strengthened by collaboration with others. once i was able to realize that mutually beneficial relationships are the key to a successful life, i noticed the positive impact stronger relationships had on my own personal growth. the final aspect that i would like to focus on in my next three years is self-reflection. a life well lived is one in which i personally feel successful. personal success is something that you can feel only once you reflect, which is why i believe self-reflection to be essential. if we do not ever take a moment to evaluate our lives and how far we have come, we will easily get lost in a cycle of feeling inadequate. particularly when i experience feelings of unassuredness and inadequacy, i pause to compare my current situation to previous years. it becomes increasingly obvious that i have come farther than i had thought. this self reflection helps us understand our https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript worth, and as our discernment conversation activities also taught us, feeling pride, contentment, and worth is further enhanced when we take a moment to self-reflect with others. in this activity, i was able to receive feedback from my parents on how i have grown through the years. this enabled me to see how important figures in my life have observed me grow as well (moreau fye week five). seeing this growth encourages me to continue to work harder and push myself towards achieving further personal success. in addition, we can find motivation for success in other ways. in particular, we can use death to inspire hard work. religious sister dedicated to reviving the memento mori, sister alethia explains this technique for living, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them,”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by sister aletheia moreau fye week three). reflecting on our lives, and more specifically, realizing the extent of them, can be a way to instill motivation. choosing to use the idea of our death to inspire us to live our present lives with more courage and strength can help us grow and flourish into the people we always wish to be. self-reflection is not only important for working for success, but it is also vital for assessing our mental health. the next three years of education and the further schooling will inevitably consist of a lot of stressful experiences. understanding when i can no longer thrive by myself will be crucial to surviving. from here i can rely on both the important figures in my life and god for advice. as technology and education advance together, it will be necessary for me to remember the value of in person contact. i consider myself to be a people person, and i do my best when i am surrounded by others. nevertheless, i can sometimes find myself consumed within my studies and communicating only via social media or instant messaging due to ease. i convince myself that i do not have time to talk to my friends or family. writer and speaker, pico iyer highlights that, “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html contact with ourselves,”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). it is in these times of intense focus on my academics, however, that it is even more important to not use technology as an easier outlet. when i do this i am inevitably damaging my mental health by secluding myself from the things that provide the most joy. similarly, if i allow myself to reflect and recognize that my mental health is not being prioritized, i can turn to god as a source of help. ted talk subject, aria swarr stresses that, “suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering with god,”(“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). god is always with us, and wants to see us succeed, and thus we need not suffer in isolation. if we recognize we need help and turn to god for advice, he will endow us with the strength to persevere. god never gives us more than we can handle, and overcoming suffering helps us grow stronger. assessing our mental health and knowing when it is time to take action is an essential part of living the good-life. the next three years and life thereafter will not be easy, but understanding the keys to living a meaningful life will be essential to finding personal success. the four main concepts i will focus on consist of pursuing my passions in my education and work, becoming wise, creating strong relationships and performing self reflection. i will work my hardest to live out these pillars everyday in order to cultivate a life well lived. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ integration 4 living a life well lived one of the things i did when making my mission statement was using this logic: “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (“the right way to be introspective (yes there is a wrong way)” by tasha eurich mfye week 6), so when writing my mission statement i asked myself what i wanted to do with my life not why i wanted to live it a certain way. so without further ado here is my restated mission statement: “i believe a life well lived is one in which you glorify god, help those around you, and live in a way that makes you happy. for me personally i will strive to glorify god in every aspect of my life, by talking in a way that not only does not put anyone down but actively raises them up, to carrying myself in a way that actively invites people and includes them. i will live my life in a way that sets an example for my children of how to live life in a god pleasing manner. i will use the gifts god has given to help those around me by becoming a teacher at some point. i’d like to help educate the next generation and better their lives by helping them understand the world around them. however, in my personal life i would like to have a fairly large family and a teaching salary will not likely support that, so i will first go out into industry or business make some money then retire into teaching. this way i can fulfill my own life aspirations as well as help those around me, and i plan to do all of that in a manner that shows god’s love and compassion” by me mfye week 13). in the next three years one thing i can do is do my best to attend class and try to learn the material. by doing so, i will be able to get good grades which will help me in getting a job, which is the first step toward my later goals in life of being able to retire and become a teacher. it will also help me because by learning my course material i can help peers or anyone else who might need help. i know notre dame has some tutoring organizations in place and i’d like to join one of those. also, i’d like to the being a ta for a class before i graduate and in order to do so i’ll definitely need to know material so i can accurately grade assignments and help anyone who might come to office hours. as a whole i think the following quote does a good job of describing how one can better their work life: “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo center for career development mfye week 4). another thing i can do is look into joining clubs such as cs for good, which each semester does a project for a company that works in giving back to the community. this will help me live a life well lived because not only will it obviously help others, but it’ll also connect me with others who want to help the world. by coming together with others who want to create change and bouncing ideas back and forth off of each other, surely better and more beneficial ideas will come of it. also doing so will help get my mind and thought process used to thinking about how best to serve others in the coding projects i do going forward. something else that interested me was when reading dean g. marcus cole’s piece (“i am george floyd. except i can breather. and i can do something.” by marcus cole dean of notre dame law mfye week 12). i remembered that one of the new problems right now is that some automatic sensors don’t recognize darker skin tones and won’t register them as activation. this injustice made me think if there was some way cs and law could cross to fix a problem like this. one thing i can continuing doing is little things for other people, like holding open the door when i know someone is behind me or just coming out/in. also smiling and nodding towards people when i see them around campus, striking up some happy small talk. also mediating similar to how hesburgh did (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley mfye week 2), just on a smaller scale, such as with friends who might be arguing over something. also, in regards to my roommate i can integration 4 continue to be as quiet as possible when i have to get up and pee in the middle of the night, or early in the morning when i have an eight twenty and he doesn’t. thanking the hall cleaning staff and my dining hall coworkers. doing a lot of little things is just as important as doing big things. a good example of this is from the coco diner: “she was like jesus in an apron” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by greg boyle mfye week 7). also including people regardless of their opinions, or backgrounds, or anything else is something small and easy to do but very important, especially to avoid things like echo chambers (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko mfye week 11). another important thing to do in a life well lived is to strive to better one’s self, both mentally and physically. in this sense i think i better understand now the joy that was discussed in week 3: “joy always pushes us forward. it’s a impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open ones talents even more widely than one had before” (“3 key things” by michael himes mfye week 3). thinking about joy in a broader context and not obsessing over one little thing and rather something general i feel makes it seem a lot more desirable. it’s important to take time to reflect and think about how a certain situation could have gone better, so that in the future when put in a similar situation you can succeed. as for physically it has been studied and proven that keeping active physically also has emotional and mental benefits alongside the physical. also using the “cathedral in time rather than space” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer mfye week 1) to reflect on my relationship with god and what he wants me to do will be beneficial towards living my life well. one thing i want to make sure i do throughout the next three years is to not lose who i truly am, i definitely want to better myself, but not at the expense of losing the things i like about myself. as my mom pointed out to me both her and i are proud of my courage and honesty so i don’t want to lose those traits in pursuit of something else (my mom mfye week 5). i want to make sure i keep my individuality because contrary to dr. robin d’angelo i believe individuality is vital to a life well lived and i don’t think it’s something only people of a certain race can have (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo mfye week 10). i also want to make sure others feel like they can be themselves and if in a position to do so i’d like to follow fr. gutierrez’s footsteps and make it so “that those who have no voice today, will have a voice and be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg mfye week 9). and hopefully in the next three years nothing happens but if my eulogy happened to come so soon i hope it won’t be one that is sad about lost potential but rather is one about how much was accomplished in such a short amount of time (integration 3 mfye week 8). how i want to be remembered and what i wish to accomplish before i die i want to be remembered as a kind person who would give up their time to help others. these past few months, i have been very overwhelmed and stressed about my various classes. it has been hard to truly sit down and talk to the people around me about deeper topics. i know i need to incorporate the ideas of stillness in my life more so that i can have those moments of self-reflection and be able to engage in fruitful conversations with those i love (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). when a person does die, people will try to remember the good things about a person first but sometimes it can be hard if that person did not perform many good deeds. i hope that after i die those who loved me and surrounded me during my life would not find it hard to remember my kind acts towards them. i feel this sentiment relates to the actions of father hesburgh because he accomplished so many wonderful acts and personally touched a great number of people around the world (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). when thinking about his life, there are certain moments that people could fixate on such as his shortcoming when it came to a certain incident involving notre dame football players and a saint mary’s student and only remember that one instant. people can be very judgmental about situations that they are not part of, and this leads to many remembering the dead in a negative light because of their failures. i want to be remembered as a faithful person. the reflection from sister aletheia about remembering to die truly expanded my perception of my faith (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). her carrying around “skulls” seemed extreme to me but each and every day is a gift from god (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). we do https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html not know when we are going to die and cannot plan for it. i am a very planned person and spontaneous acts make me nervous. however, when it comes to death, i do not feel anxious because it is something out of my control. considering the ukrainian and russian situation, i have especially felt anxious for the lives of the people involved and the possibility of a third world war. it has been difficult to fully focus on school when there are greater issues unfolding in the world. i have become very busy this semester and feel as though my faith has drifted at moments. with lent coming and the situation unfolding in the world, i have found comfort in my faith once again and know that i cannot control all things. i want to be remembered as thoughtful but not over planned. i have thought out my plan for the next four years to make sure i have the prerequisites to move onto attending a doctorate in physical therapy program. i look too far into the future and the situations i will face in the future that i forget the shortness of life and possibility of death each day. during week four especially, i became hyper focused on my path ahead including looking through the material provided such as the “navigating your career journey” article (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). i have also met with my advisor and another advisor various times so that i have a set schedule for my next four years. i feel as though i have taken the resources and ideas given to us during that week and have gone overboard. it does not bring my joy to become so hyper focused and stressed out about the future. i hope that my eulogy would include my thoughtful actions towards others and states that i had plans, but those plans did not distract me from my daily life. i want to have lived my version of a well-lived life before i die which includes being surrounded by loved ones and serving others. i want to be able to reflect on my life in my old age, if i can live for a while, and know that i gave to the world the goodness that i have received. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ i am very blessed to attend a great university and have a loving family. i also have great friends. in my conversation with my friends in week five, i found that my values are apparent to those around me that i am inclusive and wish to build a strong community with those around me (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” by moreau – moreau fye week five). with this conversation in mind, when i am reflecting on my life and before i die, i will use the techniques laid out in the article by tasha eurich by evaluating my life and my actions in “what questions” to have a tangible idea about my feelings towards my life and hope that it was well-lived (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). i believe that if i continue to live my life by working on focusing on others that i will be able to look back on my life happy before i die. one major goal that i hope i will accomplish before i die is to become a foster mother. i had volunteered at a school in high school where i worked with children who were part of the foster program. they told me their hopes and i saw how different they were to mine. i wanted to help them accomplish what they wanted to in life, but i was only there for a few weeks. i want to become a foster parent so that i can provide for those kids a stable environment to grow and become the people they want to be. i believe this ideal is much like father. greg boyle, s.j.’s ideal he stated in his book about being part of one another’s “jurisdiction” (tattoos on the heart chapter 8 page 133 by fr. greg boyle, s. j. – moreau fye week seven). this section of the book reinforced my desire to help foster children because i believe they are part of my jurisdiction, and i would be able to help. in all, i want to be remembered for my actions towards others and the goodness of my actions. i want to be remembered as someone who took a stand much like father boyle against an injustice witnessed in their community. i want to live for a while so that i can accomplish this https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 dream, but i know i am not in control of my death. i will try to let go of my desire for control in my life so that i can live a well-lived life in the present. microsoft word document1 mia mcloughlin moreau first year experience professor erik oswald 29 april 2022 integration four integration four: following my grandma’s magnet before my grandma moved in with my family, i went to visit her at least three out of seven days a week. as there is nothing, i love more than eating, i spent a lot of time in her kitchen. out of all her tchotchkes and trinkets displayed around her house, the object that stood out to me the most was a magnet on her fridge that displayed the famous maya angelou quote: do the best you can until you know better. then when you know better, do better. although i did not understand the meaning of the magnet when i was younger, the words have resonated with me throughout my life. my mother would later explain to me that she gave my grandma the refrigerator adornment because she was proud of how my grandma had grown over the years as a mother. in the 1970s, when parenting improvement books and shows were popular, my grandmother would consciously try to watch and read them, and then apply these teachings to her own life. because of the example that my grandmother has set for me, i believe that for me to pursue a life well lived, i must live a life where i do the best i can with the knowledge that i hold while keeping an open mind to ways in which i can improve. i believe that my mission statement is an accurate and genuine representation of how i want to orient my life as it is an amalgamation of what i currently know and a commitment to learn ways in which to improve. when crafting my mission statement, i had my grandma’s magnet in mind. as i have always strived my best to live by not only the teachings of maya angelou, but also my grandma, i have kept these words in my heart. as i said in my mission statement, “ i see each day as a new opportunity to learn and do better. i am not afraid of failure; and embrace it”, (mission statement – moreau fye week 13). i truly believe these words as they have proven true within my own lifetime and time again. during my time at notre dame, i have failed a lot. as i have mentioned in previous qqcs, my inability to pass a few major math exams (as an acms major and actuary minor) really impacted me in an academic and mental way. although the thought of my shortcomings still slightly upsets me, i have reached a point where i accept what happened and am driven to find ways to prevent a repeat. as it says in the hesburgh film, “it’s impossible to have a complete human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human success,” (“hesburgh film” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley – moreau fye week 2). this past semester i have improved my grades–especially my math grade. last semester, i barely hung on to a bin honors calculus i; however, i can confidently say that i will be finishing my second semester with an a in honors calculus ii. without struggling in the first semester, i would not be able to feel this same sense of accomplishment now. a life well lived is characterized by the ability to use failures in our pursuit of success. the most obvious indicator of my mission statement in action is the way in which i have learned to take better care of myself. week one’s qqc caused me to take a step back and reevaluate the way in which i was living my life. when coming to notre dame, i carried over my high school mentality of “working until i couldn’t anymore”. this included pulling allnighters, sacrificing meals, and not spending enough time with those who matter most to me. as my lack of regard for my health eventually caught up to me, i have learned that, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). this quote stuck out to me because i find the rests in music to be the most important element of a song. the silence in between notes creates a peacefulness that not only gives the musicians a break, but also fills the audience with a renewed hope of what is coming next. in the same way, pockets of peace within our lives can reset us, and prepare the mind for the challenges ahead of us. in the beginning of the school year, i would stay up until 4am, wake up at 7am, and repeat each day. the week after fall break, i fell ill for three weeks and had to rest until i healed. by being forced to do nothing for a couple of weeks, i was allowed an opportunity to recharge and realize how my lifestyle was harmful. instead of asking myself why i became sick, i realized that i needed to directly find the cause because, “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future.” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich phd – moreau fye week 6). now, i make a conscious effort to get to sleep at least six to eight hours a day (i know, this still is not technically enough; however, it’s still an improvement :) ). although a healthy sleep schedule will be hard to maintain throughout my next three years here at notre dame, by continuing to find ways to do better, i will eventually be able to reach my goal. a life well lived is one in which we pay attention to even the smallest behaviors that are harming us and try to change. a primary defining factor of a life well lived is the connections we make within our communities. this past month, i was selected as captain of my hall’s welcome weekend team. although meeting new people–especially large numbers like over eighty new freshmen–has always appeared to be a daunting task to me, i knew that the only way that i could overcome this fear was by completely immersing myself into it. as i said in my mission statement, “i will live my life as an active member of my community because it is my responsibility to care for not only my family and friends, but also those around me who are strangers,” (mission statement – moreau fye week 13). i believe that an individual cannot grow unless they cultivate all aspects of one’s personality/character because, “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall, “ ("navigating your career journey" – moreau fye week 4). by being welcome weekend captain, i am showcasing my tangible skills, along with intangibles that i already possess in addition to ones that i have yet to discover. furthermore, as leader, i will “seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart, ” ("tattoos on the heart" – moreau fye week 7). as the freshmen and members of the welcome weekend team all come from diverse backgrounds, it is imperative that i find a way for everyone to authentically connect with each other and to break down these barriers. as i said in my mission statement, i will live my life as an active member of my community because it is my responsibility to care for not only my family and friends, but also those around me who are strangers. a life well-lived does not include selectively showing love to those who we decide are “worthy”, but instead it is characterized by the ability to give kindness to others when it means venturing outside of our comfort zones. one thing that i must keep in mind during welcome weekend is the concept of accompaniment. up until recently, i have always felt that it is my responsibility to try and remedy everyone’s problems. as i have always been “passionate about everything” i do, it is only natural that i felt the need to go out of my way to advocate for others (conversation with mary mcloughlin, february 6, 2022, moreau fye week 5). however, i now know that, “‘to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard,’” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). furthermore, i must always keep an open mind to the opinions of others, especially those that i may disagree with. as i have said before, my dad has always told me that he has never learned anything from someone he agrees with. as i have learned in my ggl course, “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree,” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd – moreau fye week 11). as i will captain of welcome weekend (in my hall, when an individual is selected as captain for welcome weekend, they keep this position until they no longer want it) for the remainder of my time at notre dame, i can apply these teachings–especially since they align with my mission statement–for the next three years. the part of my mission statement that i feel will be the most difficult to live out is living a life that is guided by my christian values. as the world is becoming increasingly secular, it is hard to make decisions that are contrary to the norm, especially while being in college. before coming to notre dame, i had an experience where i questioned my faith because i was receiving pressure from my ex-boyfriend’s family to convert to their religion. i became very close to giving in; however, i ultimately realized that the way in which they were pressuring me was unethical and not a true representation of what someone who genuinely is passionate about their faith would do. as i am young and as impressionable as a ball of clay, it is easy to fall victim to the pressures of the world. when i do mess up, i must keep in mind that,” ‘you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week 10). ways in which god has shown me that he loves me is by giving me wonderful friends here at notre dame along with a support system within my family to help me through my most difficult times. these relationships have shown me joy–“a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life,” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). because of the joy they have given me, i believe that life well lived is characterized by positively impacting those around us. additionally, i believe that “by using my beliefs about god as a moral compass, i can best manifest these values through the way in which i live my life,” (mission statement – moreau fye week 13). as it says in the mission statement of the congregation of the holy cross, “for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act,” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” – moreau fye week 12). as i hold my beliefs near and dear to my heart, i believe that the only proper way for me to practice my religion is to allow my actions to demonstrate my values. i want to change the lives of others through the way in which i treat them. as i have stated before, a life well-lived does not include selectively showing love to those who we decide are “worthy”, but instead it is characterized by the ability to give kindness to others when it is the hardest. a life well lived is always having a willingness to embrace humanity. i believe that for me to pursue a life well lived, i must live a life where i do the best i can with the knowledge that i hold while keeping an open mind to ways in which i can improve. as i have many areas in my life in which i fall short, i love the fact that i have room for improvement. i see each day as a new opportunity to learn and do better. i am not afraid of failure; and embrace it. every day i am committed to doing the best i can until i know better. then when i know better, i will do better. living out my best life: here and beyond notre dame zachary sellman as i realized in writing my own eulogy earlier this year, i realized that i want to be remembered as someone who uses many small actions to build others up over time. (moreau fye week eight). likewise, in writing my personal mission statement earlier this year, i realized that in order to have an impact in small moments, i need to value each and every one of those small moments. (moreau fye week thirteen). the primary goal i had in my personal mission statement was to have an impact on others that, however small, would always be uplifting and beneficial to them. specifically, i want to achieve this through acts of inclusion, service, thoughtfulness, and kindness. as a result, i want my impact to be one that builds community, weaves togetherness, and creates happiness. building community at college is essential, because community fosters effective learning. engaging with the campus community is immensely important for learning how to be an effective citizen later on in life. in a ted talk with his holiness pope francis iterates the importance of community and what it does for each of us: “first and foremost, i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). as such, i want whatever i do as an individual to have an uplifting force for the communities i am a part of, because communities are how we build a brighter future. indeed, having this kind of effect will not be easy or one singular, discrete effort. taking my time through my life, appreciating small moments, relaxing, and introspection will be essential learning how to have the best impact that i can. as pico iyer notes in his ted talk article, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). as i noted, i want inclusion to be an essential part of my goals and mission here at notre dame. in my near future here at the university of notre dame, or, rather, in a few months, i will be a member of morrissey manor’s st. andre welcome week committee. i want to own up to that role and that responsibility by being as inclusive as possible. this will especially include making those who normally would not feel at home at a place like the university of notre dame, which predominantly white, catholic, and mostly heterosexual, feel like a cherished part of this campus community. part of this requires facing the realities that there are extreme injustices in this world, so that i can do my part in a societal effort to combat them with inclusivity and acceptance. as dean g. marcus cole states in his open letter, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). this will also include combating my own biases, recognizing my privilege, and working to combat the source of my privilege: “this systemic and institutional control allows those of us who are white in north america to live in a social environment that protects and insulates us from race-based stress. we have organized society to reproduce and reinforce our racial interests and perspectives.” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). another, possibly more difficult part of how i can be more inclusive will be embracing those who i do not agree with. certainly this year, in my moreau first year experience class as well as in more generic conversations with my roommates, classmates, and peers, i have realized that i do not agree with everyone here. embracing these people ultimately would live up to the legacy that legendary president of notre dame father theodore hesburgh left behind. hesburgh bridged gaps between sides of issues and ultimately created peace between those gaps: “he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemablity in mankind.) (“hesburgh” by kevin abbott moreau fye week two). believing in and working towards the goals of father hesburgh, i find, is an important goal to have as my future specifically as a university of notre dame student as well as a person and citizen. trying to bridge gaps between myself and those that disagree with me is quintessential for reversing the trends that are dividing our nation right now. specifically, the over politicization and political polarization that has been festering recently because of separation between different political groups. ultimately, this has made politics extremely inefficient, and has even rid politics of much of its original purpose: “they're there to serve their own emotional and intellectual needs. they're not trying to move anyone. they're not trying to empower anything.” (“passion isn’t enough (hidden brain media)” by shankar vedantam and featuring eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven). ultimately, in taking up these goals in responsibilities, i hope to be an effective leader as a member of my hall’s welcome week committee, and ultimately the most inclusive version of myself. in these last three years at the university of notre dame, i have to figure out what i would like to do with my life. except, maybe i do not. the way i see it, my time at notre dame will teach me about how to be the person i want to be, helping me grow immensely as a person in mind, heart, and soul. this way i will be able to go out into the world and do whatever i wish to do, in a way that will be beneficial to the people around me. currently, i am a computer science major, which i am excited about, but notre dame and moreau have shown me so far that education is a lot more than just a major: “it’s not a one-step process. contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). rather, a holistic educational experience, and being the best, most inclusive, version of myself determines the rest of my life. as such, i will be able to do that which both makes me happy and makes a difference. i will be able to focus on the first of father michael himes’ essential questions: “again, the first question is, ‘what gives you joy? what is the source of your joy?’” (“three key questions” by michael himes moreau fye week three). i also know that i will be able to lean on people if i do ever have uncertainties regarding what i should be doing with my life: “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves. this brief conversation can help you gain a new perspective on your life and, ultimately, help you discover how to develop a vision of a life well-lived that is uniquely aligned with your most authentic self.” (“discerning a life well-lived conversation activity” by moreau first year experience moreau fye week five). lastly, i know i might have struggles in my last few years here. however, it will be important to have perspective, and to not let struggles derail me from becoming who i want to be and achieving my goals as a person. this will require doing two things that i am not overly used to doing. firstly, i will need to voice that i am having a tough time when i am having a tough time: “evidence shows the simple act of translating our emotions into language — versus simply experiencing them — can stop our brains from activating our amygdala, the fight-or-flight command center. this, in turn, seems to help us stay in control.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha euric moreau fye week six). secondly, i will need to let people into my struggles, so that they can help me, and i can ultimately help them more as well: “in the accompaniment model, we’re in this together; we’re implicated as partners in the mix, sharing in the complexity and chaos of each other’s lives. as a result, when challenges occur, as they always do, walking together, you’re less likely to be arrogant and think you have all the solutions.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). by getting through my struggles and helping others with theirs, i will be able to round out the more personal aspect of how i can be my best self. by dealing with things more effectively and not letting anything sway me too much from my holistic goals here as a student, i ultimately hope that i can have the three years of my life here at notre dame that transform me into the best version of myself. there is no need of changing your past: it is who you are dear adriana, although you have lived a life well-lived, throughout your journey you have fallen on multiple occasions. my purpose with this letter is to give you some advice on things that you could have done differently, but i want to point out that you do not need to regret any of your past decisions. these experiences essentially shaped the person you are today and without them, you would not be even half of the human being you are as of right now. my first recommendation will be to not rush your life because sometimes you tend to stress about school, work, and other problems and forget the most crucial aspect of all: to be grateful for your presence on this earth. can you remember how you felt during your high school years? you woke up every day, attended school, went to tennis practice, and study all night long; this kept you from enjoying your life to your fullest potential. the school was so important to you that your family, religion, and wellbeing were a secondhand matter. unfortunately, you cannot rewind time, but from now on make sure to prioritize this stuff. you are so young that many years full of great adventures await you and always have in mind the following: “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). adriana, you are very fortunate to have the strong support of family and friends around you. you should have appreciated them more often and dedicated greater time to create unforgettable memories with the people that bring you joy. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ in addition to this, i will have advice you better on living the moment and worrying less about death, if there is an afterlife, or the many intrigues you constantly had. do not waste your time questioning or intentionally thinking about this action, each time you will get more confused as you understand less the why, how, when intrigues. there will be people with a different perspective about this, remember how sister aletheia made it her mission to revive the practice of memento mori, a latin phrase meaning ‘remember your death’, but never let yourself doubt your beliefs (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three”). do not waste the time of your days thinking about an event that no one even understands. instead, give that time and attention in making sure to fulfill a life lived in your years, rather than the years lived in your life. figures such as father hesburgh could have become role models in your life, inspiring you to be a better person in this world. following his path of life in doing good no matter how complicated situations can become should motivate you day do day. for example, remember when he managed to gathered americans and russians in the vatican despite the contradiction of both political parties. father hesburgh said: “russians could not even understand the church service. but i set them next to each other and for one hour a week they were in the same room talking. it may seem small, but it was a start” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two), and acquire this thinking process could have led you to leave a unique mark in the society. you have the potential to become a heroine, just as father hesburgh, just put a little bit more effort and dedication into being spontaneous and different from what others have done before. while having more authenticity in yourself, make sure to be open-mind and willing to explore throughout your different stages in life. adriana, the hardest decision you encountered was surprisingly in college, what people said to be the best time in your life. no one prepared you to https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 make your life-changing decision: choosing a career for the rest of your days. recall for a moment the day you declared your major, did you know what you were doing? it did not matter at all, still, you made a huge deal of it. you even read an article that stated, “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life,” but it took a long time for you to process it (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). i would have advised you to believe this does not define who you will be until you retire, people have made of it a big thing, you better trust it is not. as an 18-year-old, you had no idea what you were doing studying at the university of notre dame. i admire how this confusion did not stop you from wanting a career, however, talking about you with others and hearing them would have helped you in recognizing faster your strengths and natural abilities. you struggled to identify what caused you happiness and what fulfilled your interests. seeking help from parents, brothers, and close friends would have greatly helped you in being clearer about it. once, a talk with your brother created an immense calm in you. he told you how he saw you as a person that cared about reaching stability in life and how a big component will be my devotion to helping the community (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye wee five). your brother described you with one word: perseverant. although you did not know the truthiness of this characteristic in your life, you should have believed. no better word fits your personality as the challenges that come your way, you were able to trespass them all by keeping your head up and never thinking about giving up. adriana was aware that sometimes “suffering was necessary and part of her life”, what made a difference was her way of responding to it (“5 minutes” by grotto – moreau fye week six). her choice of leaving puerto rico to study was tough to experience, but what kept her alive was the fact that she was fighting for achieving her dreams. instead of the suffering of lacking her family support https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 literary next to her, she was certain that their support was present despite the distance. she took that opportunity to value her presence in be grateful and remember how much she once decided it, and once she will be able to return home and admire all the hard work she went through. for you, it was really hard to trust in people and that made the process a little bit more challenging. the time you took to open yourself to a new friendship and trusting them took a lot. you thought managing all alone was possible which you came to an understanding later on that it wasn’t that way. in life, “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent i, separated from each other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). once you found people that align with your beliefs, values, and goals you started opening yourself and counting with bigger backup support. building relationships helped you to not face situations alone. each of these situations define who you are, so there is no need of regretting your past. use them as learning experiences and always have them at the back of your mind. keep doing well, life has given you a lot already and what is coming is very promising. with love, me https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript anderson capstone integration anderson 1 annalise anderson dr. chan moreau fye 4/29/21 capstone integration: vita bene vixit below is my mission statement: i wish to pursue my calling; whatever that may be. i believe that suffering and failure are inevitable and yet overcomable and redeemable. i will spend my life researching this subject. i wish to ponder it intellectually and spiritually so that i can help others face it in reality. i believe that success and perfection are not as worthy a goal as virtue and character formation. i believe that true education should enrich your mind and heart. thus, i will seize any opportunity i can to relish in the wisdom and experience of others. i will not be reduced to a gpa. i believe that humans are complex and that generalizations undermine the depth and dignity of each individual. i will seek to understand the story of each person i meet. i will pray for strangers as they pass by acknowledging that they are a complex individual whom christ died for. i pursue quality over quantity when it comes to relationships. i believe that fulfilling relationships are based on mutual respect and investment and focused around depth. a true friend should be able to help you find either the meaning of life or your car keys depending on the situation. i wish to both seek and be this friend. anderson 2 i believe that self-reflection and knowledge are key to personal growth. in fact, self-knowledge is foundational for a meaningful life. i will dedicate my life to growing in self-reflection and helping others do the same. i value inner passion coupled with meaningful work, quality relationships, and self-respect. i wish for wisdom to permeate all aspects of my life. i desire to be a lifelong learner and teacher. whenever i help guide someone else i feel a sense of joy and peace. i hope to be a wife and mother someday. regardless, i wish to live out god’s plan for my life. i hope that i can influence both myself and others to focus on the important, deep, and meaningful things in life, big or small, and not get distracted by the trivial, petty, and ultimately inconsequential. (moreau fye week 13) i will now explore how my mission statement relates to course content and how i can apply it to my life. a key part of my mission statement is contemplating suffering. i believe that suffering and failure are inevitable, yet nonetheless overcomable and redeemable. one quote that really resonated with me was as follows: “the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering; suffering is part of our lives; it is always there. it is about how to respond to suffering with god. and that's the reason i was able to go through this and trust in god and live with joy and gratitude” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week six). every single person experiences suffering. however, this does not mean that we must be miserable. suffering is overcomable. the most important thing is how we respond to suffering and allow it to affect us do we let it make us miserable and bitter or do we let it help us become closer to god? i https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 anderson 3 believe that suffering can always be united to christ and it can forge us into better people. thinking about death is also beneficial. in the wise words of sister aletheia, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (sister aletheia moreau fye week three). i believe that we should contemplate our final end to give purpose to our present reality. no one is meant to stay on earth. our true home is in heaven. furthemore, i believe thinking about the universality of suffering can help us cope with it by turning our attention to others: “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) i believe that compassion is very important. as the article says, it comes from the latin words for “suffer” and “with”. it makes you look beyond your own needs and focus on another. interestingly enough, i find that this actually helps me calm down. if i am very stressed or anxious it usually helps me to talk to someone else about their problems because then i feel better about my own situation. especially if i try to help that person, it draws my mind to other things and i find that this perspective is beneficial to me. thus, accompanying another person through their pain can ultimately feed your own soul as it prompts you to look beyond yourself which can often bring interior peace. this fits with my mission statement as well. i also believe self-reflection is vital to a meaningful life. one of my favorite stories from the moreasu readings was as follows: “one day mahatma gandhi was said to have woken up and told those around him, “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.” his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. “i’ll have to meditate for two,” he spelled out (“why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). i believe that self-reflection and knowledge are key to personal growth. also, it https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ anderson 4 is interesting that when we are busy the first thing we give up is this time for reflection which comes in various forms (spiritual reading, deep conversations with a friend, mass, quiet time alone etc) but usually is what we need to find peace in life. through self-reflection in this class, i have solidified that i value depth. when completing the “meaningful conversation discernment activity” (moreau fye week five) and asking the question “can you reflect on a specific episode when you saw me “in the zone,” when i was at my very best? what was i doing? how/why does this episode demonstrate my best self?” i realized that i was immediately drawn to the later half of the question and interpreted this to be my virtue and character. however, my conversation partner focused on my harp-playing skills and i was immediately dissatisfied. thus, i learned that i believe that being your best self is more than just when you are “in the zone”. it is more than material accomplishments. it is rooted in interior life and the expression of that interior life through relationships. perhaps this is why i am more drawn to “eulogy” virtues over “resume” virtues. this also connects to why i love learning for the sake of learning and not for a grade. i desire to be a lifelong learner and teacher. i have had a hard time picking a major, but i appreciate this quote i found in an article from the notre dame center for career development which said, “we view studying what you love as highly practical. if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes. that sounds pretty good, right? i’m sure you’ve all done things that you really haven’t enjoyed maybe it was something a friend or family member wanted you to do or a required course in high school. it’s really hard to motivate yourself to do well if you’re just not interested in that subject matter or activity, or maybe your skill is lacking so it gets frustrating quickly. now imagine focusing primarily on that activity for four years. anderson 5 does that seem appealing?”(ccd moreau fye week four). this does appeal to me. a true education should enrich your mind and heart. i do not think material success is as worthy a goal as virtue, wisdom, and character formation. i believe that you should have a passion for what you do. i love “leisurely learning” (conferences and lectures, readings, etc) and believe that true education is a deeper endeavor than just “schooling”. one of my passions is literature. specifically, the psychology and philosophy of story. i believe that the perspective literature gives the reader allows them to awaken their conscience, deepen their empathy, and gain wisdom about human nature. tattoos on the heart was a book that i found to be very powerful. it is a collection of stories by a priest describing his experience in running a gang intervention program in the ghettos of la. in one excerpt, he describes a common situation where a boy from one gang would join the program and see a boy from a rival gang as follows: “he thinks a bit and invariably will say; “i'll work with him, but i’m not gonna talk to him”. in the early days, this would unsettle me. until i discovered that it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know”(tattoos on the heart. pg 142 moreau fye week seven). i agree that it is easy to demonize someone when they are reduced to nothing but an impersonal being or statistic in your mind. you can blame them for your problems, villainize them, judge them to your heart’s content. this “depersonalization” allows you to be cruel and unfeeling to them. however, as soon as you begin to learn about them, know their story, and interact with them as a person you begin to empathize with them. you see their humanity and are not as unfeeling towards them. when you get to know a person and their story you see their depth and humanity and are not as likely to take the simple route and “demonize” them. you see their complexity and depth. for example, the previously mentioned boy who at first wouldn’t talk with the other boy was willing to donate his blood to save his life after he had been beaten by gang members. he learned anderson 6 through personal interaction that the other person was not a villain but another human being made in the image and likeness of god. i found this story inspiring and i hope to foster similar stories of redemption. i believe that humans are complex and that generalizations undermine the depth and dignity of each individual. this segues to another part of my mission statement: maintaining deep and meaningful relationships that are rooted in making each other better people. scripture reveals how this is done by compassion but also dedication to the truth: “scriptural accounts of jesus provide a constant witness of this inclusiveness. jesus sought out and welcomed all people into the kingdom of god — the gentile as well as the jew, women as well as men, the poor as well as the wealthy, the slave as well as the free, the infirm as well as the healthy” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week 10). jesus sought out all people and spread the gospel to them. but, i would go one step further. he did not just welcome them, he called them. he called them to live a new life and they were transformed by him. they did not just stay the same. they were redeemed. he reaffirmed their dignity. he loved them despite their imperfections, but he also communicated to them the standards of perfection and taught them the way to become saints. we are all called to the constant ever-changing path of holiness. we may fall but he will help us get back up.we are called to love our neighbor but we are also called to spread the gospel and bring them to the truth. indeed, one of the best ways we can show our love for another is by helping them stay on the path of holiness even if they initially do not understand or appreciate this. leading others to god is one of the best ways to affirm human dignity. this reminds me of a quote by fr. hesburgh which says, “the most loyal thing one can do is be honest” (fr. hesburgh moreau fye week two). we have a duty to help our friends back on the right path if they have fallen astray. anderson 7 i want this dedication to wisdom and truth to apply to all of my relationshipsboth friend and stranger. i think that you should be able to have a respectful conversation with any person. one unit of ours said ,“echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles partly because of their ability to lock us into certain worldviews” (“how to avoid an echo chamber”. blaschko, think nd moreau fye week 11). this article raises interesting questions about diversity of thought versus commitment to the truth and whether or not these terms are related. this particular quote i believe raises the following questions: what is fundamentally “wrong” or “dangerous” about being solidified into a worldview if you believe that view to be right? what if your loyalty is towards a worldview that is the truth? or does this disposition not account for the fact that some worldviews may be wrong and others may be right. it seems to me that in this discussion “diversity of thought” is being hallowed as the culmination of wisdom or the greatest good to seek. however, i think by its nature diversity of thought is subservient to the good of objective truth. diversity of thought can help us reach truth by exposing us to a number of questions and answers thus helping us to evaluate how our original belief compares to others (does it stand or does it fall?). however, i do not believe that “diversity of thought” is the final end of wisdom. i think it is a means to an end. truth should be the ultimate end, not simply “diversity of thought”. you should not let differences of opinions prevent you from experiencing relationships but you can also believe that there is objective truth and even that you wish to bring someone else to your point of view, whether they be a close friend or a stranger. i long for wisdom to permeate all aspects of my life, but i want this to be divine wisdom that brings myself and others closer to god. the final part of my mission statement focuses on fulfilling my vocation, whatever that may be. the last unit of moreau also focused on this and describes how this action takes anderson 8 courage: “our mission is the lord’s and so is the strength for it. we turn to him in prayer that he will clasp us more firmly to himself and use our hands and wits to do the work that only he can do. then our work itself becomes a prayer: a service that speaks to the lord who works through us” (holy cross mission statement). this quote illuminates that faith is an act of courage. you pray and trust in god despite the chaos around you. this prayer and faith grants a peace that allows you to fulfill god’s mission despite obstacles or potential suffering. the quote says that their mission is god’s mission and that god also provides the strength they need to complete their mission. thus, they are saying that god provides the strength necessary to complete his will no matter how difficult it is. this quote also mentions the sanctification of work in a beautiful way. it has a tone of hope. this is also an example of courage. to maintain one’s faith and inner peace in the face of trial and uncertainty is an act of courage. i desire the courage to enact my mission statement and revise it if need be. integration 1 semester 2 moreau fye prof. hnatusko 3.4.21 a man after god’s own heart was born on september 21st, 2003, in torrance memorial hospital, to tony and so-young chen. now, ninety-six years later, his beautiful journey has come to a close, as a father, a husband, and even as president of the united states. this is a little bit about the wonderful life he led, and how he truly changed our world for the better. to preface, during his lifetime, he truly valued self reflection, and it helped him become the man he was. joshua’s reliance on self reflection was primarily borne out of both his christian values and his education at the university of notre dame. during his first year there he learned the importance of taking time to ponder and mull over yourself. he often cited an article he read by pico iyer: “put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this quote was truly accurate, josh often spoke about how digital devices had invaded modern space and lives and made it hard to focus on things that mattered, to take a minute to breathe, to live and feel the things around him. it was severe among his peers as well, everyone’s eyes were glued to screens, their minds and senses overloaded by the minute. before, people definitely didn't have this sort of access to an overwhelming sea of data, pictures, videos, words, flowing over and in you. josh was fond of taking some time out of his week, usually once a week, to process and have a “digital device-free day.” taking the sabbath seriously was also important to him, the focus of the lord’s day for him was supposed to be the lord. one person josh mentioned occasionally was fr. hesburgh, as someone who josh had great respect for and wanted to even model his life after, to an extent. fr. hesburgh was a true warrior of the light, someone who fought hard for equality. josh was astounded by a documentary he watched freshman year, a powerful and moving video. “put your country before party, before politics. and always do the right thing.” ~ tim romer. (“hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week two). tim was one of the interviewees and what hesburgh told him stuck with josh. to always do the right thing; that was something josh’s parents had also stressed to him since childhood. fr. hesburgh’s actions aligned with a true christian worldview and josh wanted to act on his beliefs in a similar manner. as president of the united states, josh was one of the few leaders to not give into corruption or his ego, to maintain a level head and call for wisdom above all else. to give your all to working for the good of everyone was his goal above all else, and he called everyone to a higher standard of morality and dignity. he truly desired to treat all people with love and compassion. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 when asked about his motivations, josh once spoke about a very peculiar nun he had heard about, sister theresa aletheia noble. she was someone who reminded people about their mortality, who had the ephemeral nature of human existence at the forefront of her mind. she once said, “to us, death is exotic, but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). josh said this quote was a sobering reminder of how life was, in fact, limited, and that our time on earth was precious and valuable. to do good, to avoid sloth and laziness, to achieve; these were all things josh believed only increased in value as a result of human mortality. remembering our ultimate passing away helped keep things in perspective and further motivated josh to live the best life he could, as that would make the next, with god, ever sweeter. he desired to enjoy the fruits of this life by being an honest man after god’s own heart, to be a “good and faithful servant.” his altruistic work in service exemplifies this. when asked how he discerned his path, he quoted the meruelo center for career development he had utilized at nd. “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the mfccd moreau fye week four). he said this inspired him to grab ahold of his interests and ambitions, and to run free with them. his parents had always told him to follow the path he felt was best, to do what his heart told him to, and what god had prepared for him. his studies in economics and political science took him to graduate school, where he eventually pursued a career in national security and foreign relations, and of course, eventually ended up as potus. he often cites his time at nd for giving him a sense of purpose and direction, for setting him on a straight path towards a clear future. on top of official resources, he also said just speaking with people he knew, those close to him, like his family and friends, was very valuable. he loved hearing what others had to say, and was a listener and a communicator. he said that some friends told him he was good at being a people person, at making others feel happy and comfortable, to draw people into conversations and out of their shells. he was good at building community, fostering an environment, and bringing people together like glue. other friends remarked on his reading and writing skills, as he enjoyed being creative and using words to create powerful messages. (“conversations with friends” moreau fye week five). these skills only blossomed with time and were truly encapsulated in his lifetime. sometimes, he talked about personal blocks to being his best self. he talked about how for him, self-control was by far the most important virtue as well as the hardest. but other times, his own mind would fall into questioning himself. he would find himself prying for the truth. he would try to combine what and why questions to accurately identify his emotional state and anything that felt off within him. there was a quote from an article on introspection that he mentioned: “other research suggests that self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). while he https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ didn’t completely agree with the article, as he thought what and why questions were equally important, what for identifying what was wrong accurate, and why for identifying the cause, he still talked about how just those two questions helped him accurately characterize his emotions and classify his feelings to help him have a better grasp of himself internally and soothe turmoil, doubts, and fears. and perhaps the value he talked about most, throughout his life, was bridging the gap. in a polarized, divided chasm of society, amidst political conflict and ideological warfare, josh strove to remind everyone of the human beings within everyone else. josh wanted people to be kind above all else. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a "you" and themselves as part of an ‘us.’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). this was a quote by pope francis josh loved to recite. he said that at an early age he felt the vitriolic dialogue that was corroding society’s very bonds, and he witnessed the anger on both sides, all the time. it pervaded everything, the media, books, tv, classes, conversations. it hurt him, every time he saw people sucked so far into their own beliefs they didn’t listen to anyone around them. and therefore, above all else, he talked about reminding people to be human. kindness, sympathy, these were the first steps towards recovering the severed bridges of the world around him. joshua led by example and just as jesus called us to love one another, josh also wanted people to just lay down their hatred, their defenses, and step into the light of a christian compassion. overall, these were some of the values i thought were pertinent to who josh was. the way he lived was christian through and through. and even though there are so many pastors, politicians, everyday people, who claim to be followers of god, they often don’t act like it. i am proud to say that josh was not one of these people and his thoughtfulness and his actions spoke valiantly for the person he was, someone who cherished god’s word. thank you all. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript claudia o’sullivan taylor kelly moreau fye april 26, 2022 capstone integration both my sister and my good friend pablo fought cancer when they were kids. when i talk to them about the hardest part of battling cancer, they have similar replies: 1) maintaining a will to keep fighting and 2) feeling so close to death for so long. as i grew up, i was very close with my grandparents and realized that the elderly fight a similar battle. watching the happiest, most inspiring people in my life face days where they couldn’t find the light in the darkness made me want to figure out where that will to keep fighting and that courage to drown out the fear of death and suffering come from. their persistence over feelings of hopelessness illustrated how “if you can be pessimistic, you are basically deciding that there’s no hope for a whole group of people who can’t afford to think that way” (“in a learning journey together” by dahl reifenberg moreau fye week nine). as i got older, i started to piece together my answer. whether it was when i would play cards with my grandparents and they’d nonchalantly mention that “they lived for these moments.” or when my friend pablo would open up about the guilt he felt for being rude to his mom and sister when he was sick, because he would have given up if it weren’t for their love. his loved ones made him understand that the “purpose of [his] life [was not] simply about overcoming suffering,” but rather his life was defined by the love the people around him filled it with. (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). due to heartbreaking circumstances, both my sister and pablo had to encounter mortality far too early in their lives, but it granted them a clear perspective of what they valued. they learned what sister aletheia preaches: “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness, but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). through seeing how they both lead their lives and thinking about morality in respect to my life, i realized what i articulated in my mission statement: it’s all about love. therefore, i know that in my life well-lived, “i [should] prioritize love over everything whether that’s in the personal connections in my life or by being motivated by love to help others.” (week 13) trying to actively prioritize love in one’s relationships is not a difficult pursuit because love nourishes us and connecting is human nature. however, people don’t live in insular bubbles, and i want to lead my life in a way where i try to practice and show love towards more than just my friends and family. a life well-lived is a moral life, and acting morally is just acting in a loving way towards those that you might not actually love. i might not have genuinely loved the senior citizens i volunteer with at the retirement home before i got there, but i knew that if i did love them i would go over every friday so i did. i want to make it clear that i by no means am insinuating that i live a morally sound life in any way. i am guilty of avoiding information that conflicts with my beliefs, and thus existing in some echo chambers which occur when “groups give up on tolerating adversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blashko week 11). i don’t do nearly enough to show my appreciation to my loved ones or fulfill my duty to help the people in and out of my community that are suffering. as dean cole said, “these are things that i, in my position, can do. but it is not enough. i cannot do this alone. each of us must do what we can, wherever we are” ( 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something' by dean cole moreau fye week 12) following this pursuit of spreading more love and practicing morality will require me to be completely truthful and honest with myself about my situation and how i could do better. for example, perhaps partly because notre dame is quite a bubble (which regardless doesn’t justify it), i don’t do nearly enough to learn more about racism, actively combat any implicit biases i have, or combat racism in my community. the only way i can undo this is by confronting that truth instead of “ perceiving any attempt to connect [me] to the system of racism as a very unsettling and unfair moral offense” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week 10) when “putting his moral weight behind mlk and what he was trying to do,” fr. hesburgh demonstrated this morality in action (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two). as i attempt to make these next four years well lived through acting morally and trying to learn when i don’t, i will remember that “in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity.” (“tattoos on the heart” by greg boyle moreau fye week seven) in order to accomplish all of this in the next three years and take advantage of all of the resources notre dame has, i can’t overthink and need to just take action. in my week 5 conversation, my best friend told me that sometimes my thoughts deter me from actually working towards my aspirations and goals. she is completely right because “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). i will probably spend this coming summer on a flip-phone to focus more on connecting with people in-person because“the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). from there, i will begin trying to create my life well-lived. integration 3 feix 1 tony polotto moreau 4 march 2022 integration 3: my eulogy dearly beloved, we gather today to celebrate the life of bianca victoria mercado feix. she was a loving daughter, sister, cousin, and friend. bianca always strove to brighten the lives of those around her. she wanted to make the world a better place, and tried to make a difference everywhere she went. this selflessness was not only noticed, but appreciated by all those around her. to remember bianca, i want to reflect on some lessons that she lived by. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). humans throughout history have survived with much less than we have now, yet there is this constant want for more, which results in extra waste that only continues to grow. not only does this need for more prevent us from fully realizing ourselves and finding a “good” and fulfilling life, it affects the world around us. this sense of awareness of how lucky we are to have all the opportunities we have in life was an essential part of bianca’s attitude towards life. for those of you that do not know, a lot of bianca’s family is in the philippines. because of this, she was exposed to the effects of poverty from a very young age. she developed a sense of duty to those who suffer around her and an appreciation for all she was blessed with. bianca recognized that she was the culmination of all those who came before her. her opportunities in the united states made the suffering of her ancestors worth it. it was her duty to make it in life for them. “at a university, you can’t censor ideas if they don’t agree with your own.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). bianca sought to live with an open mind. in modern times, we are taught to only listen to those that agree with us, and silence those who do not, which only leads to greater polarization amongst our populations. the world only seems to be moving further and further towards extremes, and away from striking any sort of balance and harmony. bianca wanted more people to be like father hesburgh, a priest from her alma mater who fought for what he thought was right, even if it went against the church or anyone else’s idea. bianca firmly believed in the dignity of every human being, and thought that we should treat each other with respect. bianca was an advocate for being more curious, and less judgmental. after all, if we cannot be open to others’ perspectives, how can we expect them to be open to our own? “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html feix 2 graham moreau fye week three). to live your best life, you have to realize that it is short, so that you can make the most out of it. bianca realized the gravity of death from an early age. she lost many family members throughout her childhood, and, at one point, even came to terms with her own possible death. when bianca was in high school, she found two tumors in her breast. cancer took her grandmother and affected most of her other family members, both living and deceased. this experience showed her that it was time to live her life with no regrets. her dad told her: “when you’re on your deathbed, you won’t be thinking, ‘oh i wish i worked more or did more homework,’ you’ll wish that you spent more time with your family, or spent more time doing what you loved.” it may sound morbid, but it is a reality of life. it’s important to spend your time the best you can, while you still can. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by the university of notre dame’s merulo career center moreau fye week four). bianca found fulfillment in all her experiences. one of the most defining experiences of her life was when she went to the philippines to play for the u14 national soccer team. it called into question her identity, her feelings of worth, and what she truly valued in life. in the end, bianca did not play for the team, but she earned several valuable lessons that would shape the way she experienced the rest of her life. she realized little by little how her interracial background influenced the way she approached the world, and she was grateful for her ability to see both sides of a situation, even though she sometimes felt alienated, never completely belonging everywhere. she was thankful for her siblings, who had similar experiences, and wanted them to know that they would always belong in the “space between,” right there with her. bianca’s friends can attest to the kind of person she was. for her discernment in week five of her moreau fye course at notre dame, bianca’s friends talked about how selfless she was, almost to a fault. it was clear to everyone but bianca that she was a fundamentally good person. she never thought she did enough for others, when her closest friends wanted nothing more than for her to simply take care of herself. she always saw the best in people, to a fault, which would cause her pain, but she never seemed to let that change how she approached other people. she always gave her all in whatever she committed to, and often committed to way too many things. biance strove to be a bright light to all those she encountered. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). another major aspect of bianca’s outlook on life was self-reflection. it can be so hard to truly look at yourself and your life from an outside point of view. for those of you that knew bianca, you would know that she was very indecisive. she would spend hours or even days contemplating some decision and would come out feeling just as conflicted as before. she honestly got so good at lying to herself to make others feel better that she couldn’t tell what she truly felt anymore. this is why bianca wanted to let you all know https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ feix 3 that you do not have to be perfect. you have value simply because you exist, so you should recognize your own worth and trust in yourself. “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent "i," separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). the reason bianca felt such a duty to love her neighbors was because of this catholic idea. she knew that a better future could only come by genuinely caring for one another, and collaborating to build a better future. in this way, bianca tried to emulate her grandmother, violeta. she always wanted to be just like violeta. known for her incredible kindness and unending care for others, violeta had a great impact on bianca’s life in the short amount of time bianca knew her. stories about mama violy’s life inspired bianca, and played a big role in shaping who she became as a person. although she was taken from this earth before she got to do everything she wanted to do in life, most would say that bianca was the best kind of person, caring for others before herself, and loving everyone, even strangers, with a vulnerability and unconditionality that often resulted in pain for her. despite this, she never ceased loving others. to conclude this eulogy, i want to leave you with some words bianca left for her family, who she valued above all else. “to every single one of you, i want to say thank you. words cannot express my love for you all. you are my everything, from the day you all became part of my life to my end. i do not know what kind of person i would have been without you. i do not know where i would be in life without you. i want you to know that i love you more than anything this world could ever give. it was your love that allowed me to love others, that pushed me to be the best version of myself. i wanted to be the best for every one of you. i know that i could sometimes take this a little far, and i apologize for any times i ever made you feel less than your worth. because you are all more worthy than i deserved. i take with me all the lessons i have learned from each and every one of you, and i hope that you can learn something from what little life experiences i had. most importantly, i want you to know that i regret nothing. i could never regret having you as my family, and i most certainly would not have wanted my life to go any other way. you all inspire me, and i know you are doing/will do amazing things in this life. i’ll be waiting for you with mama, uncle luis, auntie gasing, lulu, auntie pudin, travis, and all our other loved ones. kocham cie! wo ai ni! gihigugma tika! until i see you again, your doodlebug.” https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration 3 a life well lived connor was, and forever will be, a man who dedicated his life to his passions and ideas. although stubborn at times, he truly was persistent with his passions, refusing to give up at even the most stressful moments. his mother used to say that he was “driven and closely valued his friendships,” (jennifer mccloskey moreau fye week 5). he was hardworking, yet friendly, and enjoyed the company of others no matter how busy he might have been. in the end, his life leaves behind three major messages that we should all take into consideration for our own lives: advice on the self, advice on connections, and advice on a life lived to the fullest. advice on the self a quote from father theodore hesburgh that connor quite liked was, “i decided if i was going to be president, i was going to shake things up,” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). connor, as we all know, was a notre dame graduate (and he won’t let us forget it). he particularly liked this quote because he believed importance was something that was self-made. he admired hesburgh’s drive, and oriented his pursuits after ones that also would make him more important. we should not be afraid to act instead of sit in the shadows, hoping for someone else to come along. although we might never be as well-known as father hesburgh, we can still try. another quote connor liked was from pico iyer, who said “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length…so that i can more easily remember who i am,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). connor definitely had mixed feelings about social media, and his actions show this well. although he ensured that he could keep up with all of us, his friends and family, he would also use social https://docs.google.com/document/d/1c5dqrvsgixwk_brh5pkvu2ni70aotn1toss6hkv3vec/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ media much less than the average person. he never tried to attach himself or his personality to social media, and this paid off to make him become a genuine man. he also believed that absorbing social media instead of spending time with family and friends is no way to go through life, and it is definitely not a way to find oneself. connor always believed that self discovery comes from real experiences, which is where his friendliness stemmed from. he not only talked to others to learn about other perspectives, but he also talked to discover himself more fully. finally, self-reflection was something connor held near and dear to himself. he was constantly evaluating his own pursuits and actions in order to ensure that he was never going down the wrong track. he did this in a healthy way, one that he learned from his freshman year at university: “why questions stir up negative emotions; what questions keep us curious,” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). whenever connor would have a negative happen to him, he would start with these 3 questions: what happened, what did i do for this outcome, and what can i do to fix it. he would never trouble himself further with why is this happening or why do i deserve this, because he understands that bad things happen, and discovering their origin is the best way to solve personal problems and to have a more positive relationship with the self. advice on connections connor was, as mentioned earlier, incredibly friendly. he was especially keen on meeting others who seemed down in the moment, and found great pleasure in cheering them up. as a child, connor was incredibly shy, and as he got older he lost the shyness which led to him wanting to help others lose it too. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ in addition to shy people, connor loved meeting new people with different perspectives than him. a quote he liked to use was, “bridging the gulf of moral judgment and replacing it with kinship is tricky indeed,” (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle moreau fye week 7). he liked this quote because it preached on overcoming those inner judgements we make when we meet someone (and we all do) and trying to create kinship with everyone. people from all walks of life have the possibility of becoming a close friend to you, and you can never know until you try it out. with 8 billion people in the world, who’s to say that your small circle is all you need? additionally, by putting judgements aside and seeing people for who they truly are, we cease to continue the viscous cycles of sexism, racism, and other discriminatory practices. every human being matters, and they are all inherently good in connor’s eyes. advice on a life lived to the fullest finally, connor was a firm believer in living life without self-restriction. if he saw an opportunity, he would take it without second thought and then try it out to see if he truly enjoyed it, instead of leaving it up to the imagination. if asked about whether something was “worth it” or if someone should go out for something, he would say, “just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). he believed in experience over everything, and saw gut instincts as inhibition. “so what if you don’t like it, at least you tried,” is something he frequently said to his peers. food, activities, hairstyles, clothes: connor tried anything he was mildly interested in just for the experience of doing it. one important quote to him was “memento mori” as it reminds us that although death is on the horizon, the journey ahead is long we need to make the most of our time on this earth before it passes us by (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/524001?module_item_id=168039 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html will die” by the new york times moreau fye week 3). a strong position that connor took on wasting time on missed opportunity is this: we’re only killing time until time kills us slightly morbid, but frank: we must ensure that our time on this earth is not wasteful. do not miss opportunities; this is the message that connor would have wanted passed on after his death. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html capstone integration capstone integration moreau fye what does truly living mean? i would consider my analysis of the question of “how do i pursue a life well-lived?” to have begun far before my involvement in this course. i am a person with high expectations. i expect a lot from myself and from those around me and i push and motivate action towards a circumstance that exceeds all expectations. now, this can be a great trait. it has definitely helped me move away from mediocrity and find excellence both in my accomplishments and my relationships. however, this trait has also been my worst internal enemy. i have learned to measure my worth by a metric of effort and success and any disappointment can easily knock me on the ground. for the longest time, my answer to the idea of pursuing a life well lived was meeting and exceeding all sorts of expectations from myself and from others. i dare say that college has changed me in ways i never thought possible. it has been a very rough experience that has in some way forced me to realize that i am human and that if i don’t come to terms with the fact that i too, can fail, make mistakes and disappoint, i will never be satisfied. i have learned that failure is part of life’s beauties because it is where the largest amounts of growth and learning come from. is when a person has failed that it is truly its vulnerable self. if one stands in a position of accepting failure one has the biggest space to grow and pursue a good life. so i believe in short, my answer to the question stated above now is: simply live. i have developed a personal mission statement that further explains what simply living to me means. i have attempted to incorporate phrases that will guide my way to the state of absolute presence, peace, acceptance, and clarity that i describe as living and that i believe is the ultimate path towards pursuing a life well-lived. my mission is to live. i want to enjoy every second, every detail, every moment of the present. i want to live for the sake of living. i will laugh, cry, stress, fear, and burst with joy. i will jump, walk, lay down, sleep, run, and stand. i will enjoy the sun, the rain, the snow, the cold, and the heat. i will have deep talks with those i love and sometimes maybe upset them. i will learn to live for the sake of the moment and not for no one or anything else. i will be grateful for the life i have been given. i will give back to those around me, especially those who need it the most. i will learn to love. i will start with myself. love every aspect of myself. i will love my personality. i will love my body. i will love my physical appearance. i will love my bones and muscles. i will love my organs. i will love my talents and my smile. i will love the way i respond to situations and most importantly i will love the way god made me human. i will love the way that i can change and evolve. i will love the way i grow and become stronger. i will love the way i adapt to circumstances and become wiser. i will love the way i succeed. i will love the way i fail and make mistakes. i will love the way i give and share. i will love the way i love. i will continue with sharing love with those around me. god is love and i want nothing more but to spread his wholesome essence throughout the world. i will offer love to those who love me back and those who hurt me. i will offer love to those who have plenty of it and those who need it the most. i will continue to exercise and evolve in my faith. i will connect to god and serve as his slave. i will live to his image and simplicity. i will work hard for myself and those around me. i am responsible for the consequences of my actions. i act with courage, determination, and strength. i will fulfill my goals and share my privileges. i will contribute to making this world a better place. i will attempt to fight against injustices around the world. i will die a happy person, one with no regrets or no feeling of missed time. i will die grateful for having lived. that to me is a life well-lived (mission statement by moreau fye week 13). i have realized that living in the present is a determinant of how much we enjoy life. even though these past years have been extremely hard for me i have learned to appreciate the good and the bad because their coexistence is what makes life beautiful. researchers discovered that “it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye week 1). when i think https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-1-practicing-self-reflection?module_item_id=146736#:~:text=why%20we%20need,an%20external%20site. about all of the small things that have become normal in our lives as technology advances i wonder how much time would it take for me to ‘recover’ from all of the things that fill our life with information. how can we recover from receiving notifications on our phones, watches, computers, ipads every 5 minutes. in an interview with the new york times wilkens talks about “surrender[ing] everything to god” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). to live in the present means to lose the need to control everything and flow with god’s intentions for you, trusting that he loves you and knows what is best for you. attempting to keep things in control by bombarding ourselves with information, technology, and plans simply takes away from the joy of living the life that has been created and gifted to us by god. as i continue to attempt to acknowledge the present regardless of positive or negative circumstances i learn to become more grateful for the simple fact of my existence, and what it means for me and the world around me. as i continue to study political science i am amazed at how much we can get stuck as a society in the entails of a system that we have created to organize ourselves but in and of itself has no significance whatsoever. we tend to forget what is of true importance and what god has given us and become ungrateful for the situations that truly impact our lives and personalities. in class we discuss political polarization and how that is constantly creating a division between individuals. (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blashkomoreau fye week 11). i simply believe in the importance of, as human beings, managing to set our differences aside and be grateful to the fact that the universe has allowed us to coexist with each other at the same time and be able to form beautiful and enriching relationships and experiences that will determine the quality of our lives. the center for career https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-3-questions-of-a-life-well-lived?module_item_id=146776#:~:text=meet%20the%20nun,an%20external%20site.) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-3-questions-of-a-life-well-lived?module_item_id=146776#:~:text=meet%20the%20nun,an%20external%20site.) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-11-growing-in-wisdom?module_item_id=147225#:~:text=how%20to%20avoid,an%20external%20site.) development in nd spreads students awareness on how one’s choice of career reflects one’s “values, interests, personality, and skills' ' (“navigating your career journey” by university career servicesmoreau fye week 4). i realize the value that i place on serving others and that there is a direct correlation between my values, skills and choices of career. however, i do still feel a little lost when it comes to choosing something that i know i want to do for the rest of my life with getting to know myself and understanding my values and interests comes a journey of self recognition and self-love that is priceless for living a good life. one of the biggest challenges that i have encountered this year was learning to love myself regardless of the circumstance. i granted myself validation from the success of my actions instead of finding unconditional self-love. the bible and dulac talk about students becoming ““strangers and sojourners no longer...” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame-moreau fye week 10). i believe this is an important lesson for us to apply to our own selves. we should strive to get to know ourselves and give ourselves the love and respect that can sustain us as we move forward. it was interesting to discuss how “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” (“the right way to be introspective” by tascha eurich-moreay fye week 6). i found that deep introspection reflection causes one to continue finding and creating obstacles that are self-imposed and prevent one from growing. letting go of control and learning to love all circumstances one is faced with is the foundation of self-love and self-support that can make the difference between living or feeling stuck. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-10-embracing-humanity?module_item_id=147150#:~:text=the%20spirit%20of,an%20external%20site. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146950#:~:text=eurich%2c%20ted%20conferences)-,text%3a%20%e2%80%9cthe%20right%20way%20to%20be%20introspective%20(yes%2c%20there%e2%80%99s%20a,links%20to%20an%20external%20site.,-previous love should be the foundation of our life and with self-love comes spreading that same feeling to others. the sole purpose behind my career choice of political science is because i feel like my mission in life is to serve others and spread my gratitude and love towards them. in the discussion we held during moreau class in week 9 we talked about reifenberg’s experience with service. he summarized an effective form of service to others with the word “accompaniment”. (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by prof. steve reifenbergmoreau fye week 9) the impact we can have on others’ lives from simply being there with and for them makes me understand the importance of having one another as human beings and spreading love, faith and connection with those around us. pope francis shared words of wisdom saying “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7). i understand that i have been born in a privileged position and a fulfilling desire that i hold deeply rooted in my heart is that i want to be able to share that privilege with others to expand love and interconnectedness through the human race. having expanded on love i came to think about the source of all that love, that is god. he who has created us and who gave his life for us. i have experienced many ups and downs in my journey of faith and consider that as i got entrailed in the difficulties of my new life i got pulled further apart from my relationship and connection to god. the bible states ““9. god so loved the world that he sent his only son that we might have life and have it abundantly” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross”moreau fye week 12). this thought gives me hope that we are all good and that someday, through collective effort, we will achieve the best potential state https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-9-responding-to-suffering?module_item_id=147094#:~:text=teaching%20accompaniment%3a%20a,an%20external%20site.) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-7-relationships-of-a-life-well-lived?module_item_id=146994#:~:text=why%20the%20only,an%20external%20site.) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-12-acting-with-courage?module_item_id=147285#:~:text=constitutions%20of%20the,an%20external%20site.) https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-12-acting-with-courage?module_item_id=147285#:~:text=constitutions%20of%20the,an%20external%20site.) of the world and become one step closer to living god’s image and likeness. i really want to focus on growing closer to my faith and observing it as a source of constant love and support that is unconditional and i know i can always fall back on. i have talked about things that are truly fulfilling to me and even though i’m not perfect they do come out to me pretty naturally or i am extremely motivated to make them work. however, when it comes to work i have experienced lack of motivation many times. i found that the solution to these feelings of falter is discipline. when i don’t want to do my work, when i don't want to do my best because i don't feel motivated, the only thing that can push me past this stillness is discipline. father hersburgh stated ““our words are buttressed by our deeds, and our deeds are inspired by our convictions” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). it is in our convictions that one can find proper inspiration to act with discipline and hard work. in week 5 of moreau class we were asked to have a conversation with someone close to us and have them tell us something that is difficult for us to hear. i chose to have this conversation with my parents and even though it is one of the hardest conversations i have had it taught me an important lesson (moreau fye week 5). working hard and improving is, of course, hard. it is in becoming uncomfortable, in listening to things you don't want to listen to and in acknowledging those things one doesn't want to accept that true growth takes place and that the opportunity for living one’s best life arises. i think in general, living a life well lived is truly pretty simple. i believe that the important thing is to set one’s priorities straight and have a constant reminder and reflection that one is following their mission. my mission is to live life to its fullest and breaking it apart into https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/pages/introduction-to-week-2-inspirations-of-a-life-well-lived?module_item_id=146754#:~:text=hesburgh,an%20external%20site.) core elements of what that means to me can help me take advantage of the blessing that is ife from the present until the moment i die. moreau capstone integration (4/29/22) kurama 1 4/29/2022 moreau capstone integration complexions of a life well discerned during my year at notre dame, i have been exposed to a variety of new experiences that have made me question and define what pursuing a life well-lived means to me. through being exposed to new environments and being encouraged to reflect on the deep questions posed through the moreau class, i have begun to further develop my beliefs and ideologies in many regards. moreau has helped me in recognizing and documenting some of these changes that i would not have otherwise noticed. there are many interpersonal changes that i have undergone already that moreau has helped me notice within myself. in this essay, i will present my personal mission statement and how the moreau class material has impacted my understanding of how to pursue a “life well lived”. my mission statement: i wish to be someone that i would want my siblings to look up to. i want to be a great friend, older brother, son, and future husband and father. i want to find what i love, and do what i love. i want to truly love the work i do. i want to find a career that excites me every day. i will strive to be fair and true to both myself and others around me with everything i do. i wish to be a friend that people can rely on, and be that shoulder to cry on. i will stand for what i believe in, and fight until i can no longer fight no more. i will work hard, and persevere through higher education. i hope to develop within myself both academically but also interpersonally. i want to fall – and continue to have the strength and courage to relentlessly stand. i wish to travel the world, explore and intertwine with all the world’s cultures. i want to use my work to help others. i want to strive to recognize and enjoy the small moments – to work towards enjoying even the most seemingly insignificant of times. i want to find true love. and when it's all said and done, i want to feel satisfied with how far i’ve come. i believe that my mission statement encapsulates what my values are as a person, and what i want to be remembered for. i believe that if i pursue these missions that i will be a better and more satisfied and purposeful person and companion for both myself and other people in my life. in the remaining portion of the essay i will discuss in more detail how exactly the moreau class content has contributed to and helped me to both write my mission statement, and help learn how to better pursue a life well lived. kurama 2 firstly, i will aim to seek greater clarity in my life through trying to get a better understanding of what some of the bare essentials are in understanding my values. the quote, “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need” (iyer, 2014) stood out to me because i believe that this is often overlooked. from my experience, whenever society or various communities are faced with challenges, one of the first approaches is to look and see what is lacking and what additional resources can be provided to suppress/approach the problem. however, oftentimes it is overlooked that maybe the most straightforward solution is to refocus and aim for concentrated simplicity. i think that in order to better understand the kinds of lives that we as members of society lead, we need to understand the bare essential factors that are required to strive towards our goals. oftentimes, it is implied that by overcomplicating various factors in an attempt to solve problems, we may unintentionally bog down these necessities and lose focus on what truly matters. instead, if we were to approach every problem with a clear focus and not stray too far from the central goals then we would not overcomplicate, and hence we would lead more meaningful and prosperous lives. i believe that one of the ways in which we can live a more prosperous and fulfilling life is to connect with others on a more personal and interconnected level and experience a wide range of moments/emotions. the quote “...you learn there is meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith, but in the end i found strength, and as a priest i wanted to help others find their own strength, even in the greatest of suffering” (hesburgh film) stood out to me in the hesburgh film in particular because of its deeper meaning on the understanding of what inspires some to live lives that they believe to be fulfilling. oftentimes, in order to understand others on a more personal level, it requires that you first experience similar emotions in order to truly understand the pains, excitements, etc. otherwise, these support systems are shallow and feel more disconnected and artificial. i think that in order to better understand what inspires some people to live a fulfilling life we must experience a wide range of emotions/situations. i think there is tremendous value in the uncomfortable…living through times that are tough in one way or another challenges to heal in many ways that we had not previously believed to have been possible. furthermore, i think that it is important to ask questions that help us to understand what our true motivations are. the quote, “sister aletheia rejects any suggestion that the practice is morbid. suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (ruth graham, ny times) stood out to me because i both agree and disagree with the ideas presented in this article. i also believe that there is a lot of truth in the idea that facing what we find to be intimidating or daunting/dark is where we usually end up finding the “light.” however, i also believe that thinking about death every day may create some paranoia and lead people to believe that each day is a race against the clock. while i see what the idea is that this article is trying to portray, i think that it would be much more effective to just acknowledge the concept of death and to use it as one of many kurama 3 motivators for good…not necessarily as something that must be remembered each and every day. also, i think that in order to better understand what questions lead a life well-lived, we must first understand what values motivate ourselves and those around us. ultimately, it is these various motivations, whether tied together with emotions, thoughts, ideas, etc…, that make each day meaningful. with this in mind, even a day “wasted” with intention is a meaningful day because of intentions of doing so. i believe that it is not necessarily what we do with our lives, but that we do what we do with intention, righteousness, and what makes us more happy and content. also, i think that it is important to ask questions about what we can do or don’t do each day that could help us each strive towards our goals more effectively. the quote, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (meruelo family center for career development) stood out to me because i think that there is a lot of truth to it. “textbook thinking”, anticipation, and planning can only help so much. there comes a point where the most effective way to understand and learn more about certain factors of yourself is to get out there and put yourself in uncomfort in the real world. people learn from experiencing things first hand themselves, not so much just hearing it from other people. i think that some ways of living a life well lived is to just get out there and get started. i think oftentimes, people get discouraged to get out there and try something new because of the uncomfort, responsibility, or other unattractive factors involved. however, many times this is the only way to seek new opportunities or strengthen existing ones. i think as a society, we have grown too accustomed to the relative comfort of life and don’t spend time thinking about how we can utilize the resources available the best we can in order to lead a life well-lived. furthermore, these ideas that i developed through the course content and readings were further supported by my conversation with my parents during week five. in general, i felt that the conversation was very fruitful and helpful. it helped to reinforce/present some new perspectives about factors of my life that i had not really considered. it allowed me to better understand how other people see me and my efforts. a lot of what we discussed was in regards to my work ethic/dedication and caring human qualities. one thing that stretched my awareness of myself was when in the conversation we talked about my ability to find happiness in almost any situation. i would consider myself a pretty hopeful person as i am always looking for the positive things about certain situations. in other words, even when it is most dark, i always try to turn towards the light. it was also interesting to hear another person’s perspective on my strengths as a person. things that i usually overlook or don’t consider to be important strengths were things that were brought up in the conversation. it made me realize how easy it is to overlook all of the positive subtleties in the midst of day-to-day stresses and anxieties. furthermore in week six, the quote, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (tasha eurich, ted conferences) resonated with me because it just shows that self-reflection can require some practice and focus/knowledge of what to be looking out for/reflecting on before it is very kurama 4 effective. i think that with some structure, self-reflection can be a really helpful tool for self-improvement in a variety of aspects. also, self-reflection can be a recovery/mental health resource as it can potentially even have positive mental health benefits with reflection and looking to the positive/constructive side of things. i also think that some ways to recognize and evaluate personal obstacles to living a life well-lived is to first self-reflect meaningfully and effectively. strive to associate yourself with people around you whom you enjoy spending time around – groups that help to raise one another up. self reflecting effectively can have a great moral satisfaction if done well, as it can incite even further motivations to pursue goals and perform well. this cycle of reflections and motivations will aid in identifying and addressing the obstacles that may inhibit a life well-lived. therefore, it is crucial to understand the importance of self-reflection, and techniques to best go about doing so. also, i think that in regards to relationships that are characteristic of a life well-lived, an understanding of what kinds of relationships that we currently have and value is very important to recognize. the quote, “why them and not me…” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) stood out to me because it just shows that many times for some reason or another life is not fair and equal for everyone, and that almost always some people can be seen in more advantageous positions than others. oftentimes, this can leave us wondering what it truly means to be in certain positions, and what responsibilities/factors come with being in certain situations. also, i think that this concept in-and-of-itself warrants a clarification of the definitions of what some of the more advantageous positions may be. for example, some people may view certain things to be attractive while others may think otherwise. ultimately, it is important to understand where we as individuals fit in the context of the societies around us and hence what our responsibilities/objectives/goals in each position must be. furthermore, i think ultimately this concept of evaluating personal advantages/positioning in life compared to others around us can be very obscure in definition (since it can change with each person’s beliefs on certain ideals), but very powerful in context of where we are in our communities/societies as individuals and what responsibilities/goals we should be striving to fulfill given our current circumstances. also, as pope francis explained, this idea of “why them and not me…” further shows the importance of how the future worth building must include everyone. each person is just one placeholder, one piece in the giant puzzle that is our collective future and betterment. therefore, it is essential to understand our current place in society, and how to best move forward that benefits the collective interests of humanity as a whole. furthermore, i think that in order to engage with accompaniment in a suffering world, it is crucial to identify and establish the support systems in your life. this could be through many different means, such as finding a person that you would be comfortable talking to about uncomfortable topics. the quote, “‘to accompany someone is to go somewhere with him or her, to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an end.’ there's an element of mystery, of openness, of trust, in accompaniment” (professor steve reifenberg) stood out to me because it presents and elaborates on the idea of the importance of trusting companionship and interpersonal relationships. when responding to and working through kurama 5 suffering with others (or within yourself), it is crucial to seek these relationships/support systems with people that you trust. the value/impact of having someone else listening to your stories/struggles (even if they are unable to help, and just listen to your emotions) can have an insurmountable benefit towards moving towards recovering from various forms of suffering. also, i think ultimately this concept of companionship and accompaniment may be one of the most effective/timely approaches to feeling better about confronting/moving forward with recovering from suffering. oftentimes, when you share your thoughts with family/other people you trust, it can help to make you feel better because you are not storing all of those pent up emotions inside of you. also, having someone to sit down and speak with may help to formulate some potential plans/approaches to the sufferings. for example, if these companions also experienced/were in similar positions at some point. also, i think that one way to start better embracing humanity is to push yourself to have greater exposure/awareness to the world’s many different cultures and start developing more meaningful relationships with people from all around the world. the quote, “mainstream sources — schools, textbooks, media — don’t provide us with the multiple perspectives we need. yes, we will develop strong emotionally laden opinions, but they will not be informed opinions. our socialization renders us racially illiterate. when you add a lack of humility to that illiteracy (because we don’t know what we don’t know), you get the break-down we so often see when trying to engage white people in meaningful conversations about race” (dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost) stood out to me in particular because i think it summarizes the ideas around how race is difficult to talk about with white people. from my own personal experiences, i think that there is a lot of truth to this. i think that oftentimes many americans are simply culturally unaware with many of the world’s cultures and respective ideologies. because of this gap in knowledge, it can be difficult to hold constructive conversations around ideas of race. furthermore, i think ultimately this concept of a lack of cultural exposure among many americans has a detrimental effect on many of the world’s systems. oftentimes, much of our knowledge is drawn from media, news stories (or any other media influences), and usually these sources of information are insufficient to deliver a comprehensive understanding of culture. therefore, i think that in order to start being able to hold more meaningful conversations around race, we must first be open to the idea of understanding and embracing the other cultures of the world (whether that be through traveling more, etc.). i think that because of america’s power and media influence on the rest of the world, that there is a barrier for increased cultural exposure within the country. therefore, american culture can almost be seen as the “dominant culture” of the world which in turn leads to even more inability/reluctance to further understanding other cultures. furthermore, i think that in order to become wise in general, you must begin by first learning and recognizing/acknowledging many different perspectives and associate yourself and spend time with people from all different backgrounds. the quote, “echo chamber, a social structure from which relevant voices have been actively discredited” (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd) stood out to me in particular because i think that there is a lot of truth to this idea in kurama 6 the everyday real world, as well as through forms of media that we are exposed to. i think that oftentimes we as people tend to associate ourselves around more people that are similar to us in many ways. i feel like this tendency is almost natural, as people want to put themselves in environments where they share common thoughts/opinions with others so that they feel more comfortable. however, because of this many people can be limiting themselves and the formulation of their thoughts to only align with their current beliefs. when you are around people that mostly agree with many of your values, there will rarely be reconsideration or a holistic evaluation of concepts (because they are not exposed to other ideas). also, i think ultimately this concept of many people being stuck in an “echo chamber” or “bubble” is very important to consider. oftentimes, i think the greater concern is when the people that are stuck in these “circles,” are unaware that they are indeed in a “chamber” (or even that a “chamber” exists in the first place). i think that this is the most detrimental/damaging circumstance of them all. because, how is one supposed to even begin recognizing/acknowledging their circumstances if they are unaware. therefore, i think that it is crucial for society to continue to accept and intertwine itself with people with all different perspectives and backgrounds. because, only when we see opposing viewpoints do we move forward in a society – if all we ever did was regurgitate the same ideas back and forth in an “echo chamber,” then society will not advance nearly as effectively or efficiently. furthermore, i think that one grows in the courage to act by growing the courage to “see.” one that listens more than speaks, is often one that speaks most knowledgeably and constructively in regards to matters. therefore, i believe that finding the courage to act can be further developed by first listening to others and their stories and beliefs, and where you stand among them. the quote, “...i know that those men will never have to answer for what they did to us. at least not in this life” (marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school) stood out to me in particular because of its blatant truth. unfortunately, we live in an unjust society, where thousands of people commit crimes and treat others poorly, and get away with it. this inadequate consequence is what has contributed to the continuation of a lot of racist behaviors from certain groups of people. with no threat or concern of consequence (or very little if any), there is no basis on which to judge immoral acts and to punish those who commit the immoral acts. i believe that in order to move towards more equality in all aspects of society, we must first look to recognize its presence and significance in the current day in age, because only then can we even begin to act on it. also, i think that racial biases (and all other forms of inequality as well) are still more prevalent in today’s society than we admit or recognize. unfortunately, the modernization of technology and opportunities has only widened the gap between populations and has further regionalized certain social groups. therefore, it is crucial to understand that all people are people and by no means should be treated any lesser or any differently. unfortunately, we still live in a society where not all people believe this. however, i do believe that there will always be room for improvement in helping to push society forward in being more inclusive of all populations. kurama 7 ultimately, throughout this semester i have learned a lot and have been exposed to a variety of new experiences. i have begun to further develop my beliefs and ideologies in many regards, and moreau has helped me to identify some of these changes and how they have impacted my understanding of a life well lived and discerned. kurama 8 works cited "why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three "navigating your career journey" by muerelo family center for career development moreau fye week four "the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine “why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost moreau fye week ten “how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school moreau fye week twelve https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzldbuiweivfjfj94oqqkbygsuwrirftvni92bvkjbowsdyux2nh7eta%2f%2famwsmsrdhmnppneeqybyxydo6gh%2bgpa3lbajlju6yo46yy1ge8ho3c4qsysiihzzjuulat0ahmixsw%2faflcvwmdakybsuidlaanntoh%2blbiixtf7advawtky2jjl35y4klv1faukvlwtldgnm8ohnpkokq49iy3mn13hd3z6w1oguvbgfnpebjcjdwob2ttdkf1dp9unjzjo%2fsbmyjkpdelpijtoql1ozvsiho7ewsyhf9ioqwhzby%2ffc6uno%2fy53vaiupetqrkxcl2cx%2bryxhe8u1ictddpuh%2bcnmy4ifedie4xy1ds3yddhnvclvx%2fun2yf76idkoireikisw55f3%2f7ea%2fhemf%2fjxulikjmx4nq2msrlsd%2b7m28obd7ts8vlf%2fzl%2fffl8h2ezf%2fh9pr%2febkqgnhvc1flhbtvnonf0%2bdlrqxp%2flid7fy0%2bfxa9u93m78c&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=vplodss6bzyvc65nur9ai6gv7nauoj4orbyrtrhv1up%2fumdd3jt%2f6%2fhyugep%2ffiioppfqzmqd%2b%2flnwa3lp7ld8p%2bb4z4ze1rfrpnlu7mhha0uh8iqw74yoxiqqg4edequwie3hmxelgr%2b7jkpp4nqo%2bmcm4i6zpxvxre8rwmsn57dnvvyzub2azovr9%2b5bqohhlcdpeenfgutsibzumjg7sixgy0t45kpr9uamk4hm0x5jvkgxadiit2qz1ny9%2btm2p01jlls6rggl13eewkvjctgutrwanrbsrd9%2fpptb4e%2finakquta21i24gwbkpv2q90wlibr%2fypqibft4najg%3d%3d https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ moreau integration 3 moreau integration assignment 3 write a letter to a younger version of yourself describing the characteristics of a life well-lived. dear young annette, it’s me! from the future! and boy do i have a lot of updates to tell you. i’m currently in the second semester of my first year at notre dame and learning a lot about the characteristics that will make my life well-lived. i thought i’d write this letter to you so that you can get a head start. it’s never too late to start thinking about what kind of person you want to be. for your convenience, i’ve divided up the letter into seven sections, each section representing a different life lesson i’ve learned. enjoy! practicing self reflection the first lesson i learned here at notre dame is the importance of slowing down and taking some time to simply be in the moment and relax. as you grow up, you will be more and more immersed in the world of technology and social media. as this happens, i hope that you choose to be responsible with the constant notifications you receive. realize that you do not need to respond to every notification you get right when you get it. especially in college, when you are bombarded with emails, learn to be still meditate! utilize apps like calm which help you structure time to practice meditation and thoughts of gratitude. i know that you’re a busy gal, but “it’s precisely those who are busiest, who most need to give themselves a break.” it’s important you make healthy habits that will strengthen your mental health. this can only help you in the long run (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) inspirations of a life well-lived i also want you to know that you will live through a very critical time in history. there will be a lot of political and moral chaos in the future. of course, there will be triumphs and incredible advancements in technology and science, but there will also be great tension within the united states. you will experience huge moments in the conversations surrounding racism, sexism, homophobia, and all of human rights. during all this, i urge you to use your voice for good. be on the right side of history. do not back down because it is more comfortable and safe to do so. speak up for yourself and those who need your support and allyship. one quote that was spoken about notre dame’s father hesburgh stated that “he belonged to the side of decency, he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind.” i hope that such a quote can also be said about you. many of the decisions you will be faced with won’t be easy. still, don’t back down. create meaningful change in the world. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) questions of a life well-lived you’ll also find that life isn’t always so happy. there will be hard moments in your life, times when you feel that the darkness is forever. understand that there is always light at the end of the tunnel. learn from these dark times. don’t run away from the pain. instead, accept them for what they are and frame them in a way that ultimately serves you. start finding the humor in everything, even the most stressful situations because you’ll realize that in the big picture, they aren’t so life-threatening after all. remember that emotions are just emotions so take them for what they are. if you are feeling a bad one, i promise you that feeling will pass soon enough. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) exploring a life well-lived when thinking about the career that you want to pursue, i hope you choose a job that not only harnesses your talents but makes meaningful change in the world. don’t just look for the jobs that make us the most money, or that we happened to be the most skilled in, but the jobs that we actually enjoy doing and feel that we can make a good societal impact in. you know what you are talented at, and you know what you aren’t so great at. use this self-knowledge and awareness to your advantage! if you do so, i promise that you will succeed in whatever field you choose to be a part of. (“navigating your career journey” from the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) discerning a life well-lived one thing i hope you will begin to do more is feeling comfortable enough with mom and dad to sit down and talk to them, not just about how school is going, but about the kind of person you are and the kind of person you want to be. i know that it seems awkward to have these conversations, but i promise you that they will be greatly valuable and rewarding when you do. they’re your parents for pete’s sake! they know a lot about you and can help guide you to the goals you want to achieve. you’ll have some of these conversations when talking to them about what kind of college may be a good fit for you, but i urge you to have these discussions even earlier. allow them into your life. you’ll realize that they understand the things you are going through a lot more than you think. after all, they were once kids too. (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five) obstacles to a life well-lived https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing probably the most important lesson i have for you in this letter is to be careful with how you introspect. trust me, i know that we love to self-reflect. and i think that it’s good we do so! however, we need to pay special attention to how we do so because you know that we often fall into the cycle of reflecting the wrong way and feeling trapped in victimhood. one quote i heard from a ted talk that resonated with me said this: “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences.” to avoid this, remind yourself to ask “what” not “why” questions. also realize that good introspection isn't easy. it is not just enough to be alone with your thoughts but to be proactive with them to actively work on yourself and redirect to a positive direction. with good practice, you’ll find yourself becoming a more grateful and overall happier person. (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) relationships of a life well-lived finally, i want to tell you that being a good person isn’t as simple as being kind and donating to charities when you can. sometimes, you need to make personal sacrifices to actually make a difference in the world that’s just how it is. mother teresa once that "one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense." use your privilege to help others, not to simply benefit yourself. don’t just do what’s convenient or easy for you. volunteering for a little just to boost your college application or feel a little better about yourself isn’t true volunteering. sure, this isn’t easy and may mean that you ‘ll have less time or money to spend on yourself, but only when we love at our own expense is it true love. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone””by pope francis moreau fye week seven) now that you’ve read this letter, i hope you are able to take in everything i’ve told you and more consistently integrate these lessons into your life. i can’t wait to see all the amazing things you’ll accomplish. until i write again… with great love, (future) annette https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript hartzer, grace: integration moreau fye capstone integration april 29, 2022 living by my mission statement leads to fulfillment i strive to live by my mission statement in order to pursue a life well lived: i am truly happy when i am able to fully give myself to those i love and graciously accept what they have to offer. i will make an effort to prioritize my own health and the health of others by building meaningful and loving relationships. allowing myself to be vulnerable and authentic allows me to build such relationships. i vow to use my relationships to promote positive change in the world. i strive to implement the knowledge and wisdom i have gained both before and during my time as a notre dame student for the betterment of our society. through my education and future career, i will use the skills i have acquired in the classroom and beyond to serve my community to the best of my abilities. furthermore, i plan on continuing to develop my faith and connection with god. as a child of god, i work hard to live a faithful life through strong moral values and a commitment to service. i make an effort to see god’s beauty in everyone around me. living a good christian life in accordance with the written word of god is a crucial aspect of my character. finally, i am dedicated to being present and appreciative of every moment i have with the people i love, especially my family. i work hard to cherish the time we have together and have become increasingly appreciative of the time spent together after moving away for college. (“writing a personal mission statement” – moreau fye, week 13) the combination of authenticity, service, faith, and education make up the person i am today and i am proud to live by these morals as i continue to grow into an adult. looking back on my first year as a notre dame student, i can see how this mission statement has played out in my life. though i hadn’t yet formally expressed it, the values i lived by have remained the same. from the first week of class this semester, we focused on self-reflection this was key in helping me determine my strengths and weaknesses. i quickly identified that i struggled with opening up to others and accepting their help. especially while experiencing suffering i prefer to close myself and deal with it alone as i do not want to feel like a burden to others. being aware of this helped me make a conscious effort to be better at asking for help when i needed it and allowing myself to be vulnerable. while it has been incredibly hard for me, making the conscious effort to be vulnerable has helped me express more of my authentic self to those i love. it has helped me form more meaningful relationships which, in turn, has helped me live a more fulfilling life. a quote that i found inspiring from this semester was, “accompaniment is, in some ways, like teaching. it is a practice. by being aware of what you’re trying to do, engaging in it, reflecting on experiences of it -both accompanying and being accompanied -you get better.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). this quote resonated with me because i know i could get better at being accompanied. even though i don’t like it, i know that i could be more appreciative that i have people in my life who want to help me through suffering. that being said, i also need people to understand that we all deal with suffering differently and they need to respect that i prefer to deal with it alone. additionally, this self-reflection helped me understand that there is more to the college experience than simply grades. while academics are still important to me i have also been able to take advantage of more activities this semester with my friends. (“personal reflection assignment” – moreau fye, week 1). in addition to discovering my weaknesses, i also discovered what it means to me to live a life well-lived. this is one of the main ideas in my mission statement. the idea of surrounding yourself with people that make you happy and people that you can make happy is evidence of a life well-lived. from the start of the school year to the end, my friend group has changed and i am sure it will continue to change in the future, but right now i have surrounded myself with people who bring me so much joy. it is not to say that i was unhappy in high school, but i have been significantly happier and more myself since coming to college and meeting my closest friends. (“inspirations of a life well lived qqc assignment” –moreau fye week 2). i knew what it meant to me to live a fulfilling life, but how was i, and will i continue to obtain this? in class, during week three we took an interesting approach to this idea by focusing on our own mortality. “the idea is to deliberately take into consideration your personal dying day-after-day, as a method of appreciating the current and specializing in the future.” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3). while this can be kind of morbid to think about, i think this quote is important because it reminds us of how precious life is. we only get one life and it is important to live it to its fullest. taking risks even though it may lead to failure is all part of the process. we must get outside our comfort zone so that at the end of our lives we know we lived a fulfilling life without regrets. similarly, this helps us appreciate the present. it encourages us to move on from the past and eagerly embrace what lies ahead. while in the future i will probably try to avoid thinking about my own death, something that my mission statement highlights that i can do to know i am living a life well lived is to take time to appreciate the moments spent with family. after moving away from home for school, i gained a deeper appreciation for the relationship i have with my family, especially my sister, and in the future, i will continue to make a strong effort to make sure we always have a bond. currently, i make sure i text to ask about her day and try to facetime with her at least once a week. small things like this help us to stay connected even when we are living in different states, and this connection is very important to me and living a fulfilled life. i hope to live by my mission statement during my life after school as well. i strive to help the community through my future career as a chemical engineer. though this semester has been very hard for me, and i know it will only continue to get harder, i work really hard to remember that though i may not love the classes, i do still love the subject of chemistry. luckily, i have had supportive friends and family who have encouraged me to continue with chemical engineering. many times this semester, i have cried over bad grades, overwhelming workloads, and the feeling of not being smart enough to be an engineer. however, surrounding myself with people who love me, they have helped me understand and discern what i want to do in the future, while i am still a little unsure about my choice to pursue chemical engineering, i know the people i have in my life will support me regardless of the path i take. (“exploring a life well lived ccd activity” – moreau fye week 4) this has made my discernment easier. regardless of where i end up, i know i will be able to use what i have learned in college and apply it to helping people throughout my career. this also ties back to how i can live a fulfilling life by making those around me happy. if i can use my job to make a difference in the lives of others, i know i will have lived a life well-lived. (“discerning a life well lived qqc assignment” moreau fye week 5). however, i have learned that there are also obstacles to living a life well-lived, and i have definitely experienced some this semester. stress is the biggest one. however, instead of focusing on how stress targets my weaknesses, i have learned how to use my strengths to counter it. one of our reading assignments stated, “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders, and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). i thought this quote was very important because oftentimes we think that we need to have a strong awareness of our weaknesses, and that is true. however, it is also important that we are aware of our strengths. this will allow us to build better relationships with those around us along with being more successful in our day-to-day lives because we will be able to identify what we are good at and use it to improve the lives of others. as i state in my mission statement, i hope to be able to continue using my strengths to make the lives of the people i love better. i have come to learn that some of my strengths are listening when others simply need to vent, making people laugh when they are sad, and bringing people together and creating a welcoming environment. all of these strengths have helped me live a fulfilling life and i hope to be able to continue to use these strengths to help others live a fulfilling life. another one of the biggest components of my mission statement is forming meaningful relationships. relationships are something that we focused on a lot this semester of moreau. i have discovered that the people we surround ourselves with are one of the biggest indicators of if we are living a life well-lived. this year, i have made an effort to be unapologetically me and allow myself to surround myself with people who truly make me happy. it has helped me form meaningful friendships and i am so thankful for all of the people i have met these past few months. one of the readings included a very powerful quote that read, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week 7) i think this quote is important because it discusses that happiness is truly attained when we are at peace with ourselves and those around us. i work hard to make sure i am doing what i love while still being able to serve those around me. this allows me to create harmony between myself and others which brings me happiness and aliens with the values in my mission statement to help me live a life well-lived. i plan to continue working to bring happiness to myself and others during the next three years of my college career and beyond. in terms of faith and my mission statement, i hope to continue to strengthen my relationship with god. i can do this by working to create a loving community and love others the way god intended. i have never had a super strong relationship with god, as religion has never been a huge aspect of my life. during the reading from week ten, there was a quote that stuck out to me. “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.” ("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh – moreau fye week 10) this quote resonates with me because i feel like almost everyone struggles to love themselves and to feel god’s love at times. however, now that i attend a catholic university, i am working on forming a deeper connection with my faith and being more conscious of god’s love for me. i plan to do this by living in accordance with god’s word, attending confession more often, and taking time to reflect and thank god for the blessings in my life. growing in knowledge and wisdom is crucial to my character. it is important to me that i always continue learning so i can continue to better myself. however, it has become clear to me this semester that knowledge and wisdom are different. knowledge has a more academic connotation while wisdom is gained through experience. my time at notre dame has helped me grow in both knowledge and wisdom and i am thankful for the opportunity i have had to grow from these experiences. whether it was learning how to navigate the communal bathroom, living with a random roommate, or changing my study habits, all of these have shaped me into the person i am today. and i know that the experiences i will have in the future will continue to shape me further. learning from experiences and being informed is more important now than ever. “it's our duty to be informed”, read a quote from class (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau week 11). this quote resonated with me because i think it is very true. it is important as a citizen that we are informed of what is going on in our world so that we can make decisions based on facts. especially today when misinformation is so prevalent it is more important than ever to make sure we are properly informed on important issues. being well informed will help me live out my mission statement in the future. finally, i vow to continue to live out my mission statement by acting with courage for those in need. in an effort to form a loving community i will do my best to speak up when i see injustice. the reading from week 12 reinforced the idea that everyone needs to stand up to injustice to see its end. as it can not be cured by a single person. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole – moreau week 12) this quote resonated with me because i think it is very important to understand there is not simply going to be one “cure” for injustice. in order to end injustice all together, we all need to reevaluate the way we view each other. we must make a conscious effort to be more inclusive and understanding. everyone needs to make changes in their life and have an open mind for us to finally end all forms of injustice. it is through these ways i will continue to live by my mission statement not only for the rest of my years at notre dame but for my life beyond. i strive to make the world a better place and in doing so i will find happiness. this deeply rooted happiness will assure me that i will not only have pursued a life well lived but also a life i am proud of. integration sp22-fys-10102-17 david lassen 03/03/2022 wanting is power today we have lost a very important person. we have lost a mother, wife, sister, aunt, and advocate. was truly a person that should be remembered not only for what she accomplished but for the path she set for others to follow. xochitl grew up in a neighborhood located on the north side of chicago. rogers parks meant more to her than what people would expect a neighborhood to mean to someone. there she not only spent the happiest days of her life but she also witnessed injustices against her own people. constant injustices were committed against her parents and neighbors which shaped the person she became. while other students would get ready to go to their high school homecoming, she had to go to work to help provide for her family. this made her realize that she did not have any time to waste. coming from undocumented parents, xochitl was well aware that her life could change in seconds. “twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyermoreau fye week one) xochitl knew how precious time was and how she had to take advantage of all the opportunities presented to her. a moment that changed the way she perceived life was when her grandmother died. that was the first time she saw tears streaming down her hero’s face. her dad spent 26 years without seeing his mother because the border separated him from her. his mother agonized two hundred and thirteen miles away from him and the fear of not being able to come back to his https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ established family kept him from seeing his mother one last time. that was the day xochitl made herself a promise. she promised herself that she would work day and night until the voices of undocumented people were heard. during high school, there was no class that she did not master with academic excellence. she was named valedictorian of her graduating class and her speech was dedicated to her father. she promised both her parents that no matter how long it took, they were going to be able to see their homeland again. xochitl was awarded a full-ride scholarship to the university of notre dame. little did she know that her life was going to change. not only did she attend the university of notre dame without knowing anybody, but she also faced challenges she never encountered before. xochitl realized how different she was from other classmates. not only did she come from an underserved community, but her past institution also did not prepare her for the academic intensity of notre dame. not being able to connect with her classmates really affected her social life and there were times that she felt like giving up. she would call home every day because hearing her parent's voices reminded her why she was there. “it's because of his faith that he never lost hope”. ("hesburgh film" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) despite xochitl being at a catholic institution, she did not have a strong affiliation with religion. she put her faith (trust) in herself. whenever she felt like giving up, she looked back at everything she had accomplished. she would remember the promise she made to her parents and that allowed her to push through hardships. her first semesters at notre dame were truly the hardest. xochitl felt empty and found herself missing home more than ever. there were times when she wondered if notre dame was the right fit for her. she was truly unhappy and felt like people were prejudiced against her. she https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 realized that this was interfering with a live-well life. through one of her classes, xochitl realized that “joy–the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life.” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) she then realized that joy could be achieved through listening to one's needs. xochitl found hobbies around campus and most importantly was able to find watts to help the hispanic community. her freshman year, she volunteered to read books in spanish to little kids at holy cross elementary school and she also got a research assistant position translating immigration data in spanish. this feeling of doing something for her community truly made her feel joy. she continued on helping people even if she did receive anything in exchange. the fact that she was making a difference in someone’s life was her biggest reward. she truly discovered her path to a life well lived. xochitl discovered her passion. she really enjoyed helping people. she saw her parents through them. she decided to major in political science because the major felt the most closely related to understanding why injustices occur and how the governmental system works. there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) even though her parents would have loved seeing her as a doctor or engineer because of the well-paid jobs, xochitl knew that there was more to life than money. her dream was to go into congress and represent the voices of the unheard. she always believed that in order to make a change, a change had to be made in the system. xochitl graduated and continued on helping underserved communities as well as advocating for their human rights. one of the biggest rewards she received wasn’t just the joy that she was making a change but the fact that she was inspiring other people to follow her path. her little brother, oscar, meant the world to her. seeing him proud of her was the biggest reward https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/471831?module_item_id=146508 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ she received. back in college, she had a conversation with him that really made her reflect on her actions. xochitl was insecure and often doubted her place at notre dame. once she heard how proud her little brother was, she started to be more grateful for what she had. (discernment conversation activitymoreau fye week five) “but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others.” (“five minutes” by grottomoreau fye week six) she realized that there were many people out there that would love to have the opportunity she had. she stopped focusing on the negative things and appreciated the positive things. gratitude was another feeling she discovered that opened up her path to a life well-lived. “close your eyes; see with the other one then we are no longer saddled by the persistent judgments or ceaseless withholding, our constant inclusion” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.jtattoos on the heart moreau fye week seven) xochitl started focusing on herself, her goals and everything fell into place. she ignored the people that doubted her and excluded her. it was not easy and at times she still felt uneasy, but she persisted. wanting is power, she lived by that phrase and it helped her live a life well-lived. everything she promised, everything she desired, she achieved. not only did she comply with the promise she made to her parents, she was able to get other people to see their homeland and family again. i can say she lived a life well because she followed her heart and did everything in her hands to make a difference in this world. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/16418 matthew kavanaugh 4/19/22 moreau fye integration 4 the pursuit of a life well-lived my personal mission statement is as follows: as a devout catholic, i strive to spread god’s word and do my best to create good in the world. i will seek to gain understanding, to enlighten myself on as many things as possible. i will attempt to form relationships with those who may be different from me. i will do my best to help as many people as i can. not only those who need it, but i will try to give my assistance to all those around me. i am a responsible son, brother, and friend. i look out for family and friends, and i am always there for them, in good times and in bad. in my professional life, i am responsible for all of my decisions. i will always choose to act with courage, dignity, and respect. i will be humble, and i will never settle for anything less than greatness. i will pursue success with a passion, never resting until i reach my goals. i value my personal freedom and opportunities. i will always fight for those oppressed against, and i will sacrifice myself for the greater good of others. finally, i will choose love above all else. every decision i make will be out of love, and i will judge the success of my life by the amount of love i am able to spread to others. when i think about my personal mission statement above, i think of all the things i want to accomplish throughout my life. our lives here on earth are so busy that we must take a step back every now and then to reflect on what we’re doing and the life we are trying to live. when we reflect, we must ask ourselves the difficult questions. “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future.” this quote by tasha eurich in “the right way to be introspective (yes there’s a wrong way)” illustrates to us the benefit of reflection ("the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). instead of asking yourself why certain things in your life are happening, you must always have a positive outlook on life, as optimism can carry you through some of the toughest times. i’ve learned to manage my emotions and therefore, became a better person because of it. reflecting on what my feelings really are has helped me become more self-aware and i am now able to better manage my emotions. the benefits of meditation are incomparable to any form of self-reflection. “it's been found by scientists that meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains.” this quote by pico iyer in “why we need to slow down our lives” encourages us to instill meditation into our daily lives ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). iyer explains the benefits of meditation and how we as humans far too often omit meditation and reflection in our lives today. in my personal life, i try to take 15 minutes when i wake up and 15 minutes before i go to bed to pray and reflect on my life. i try to meditate on what is going well, what isn’t, and what i need to change about my life. always making time for meditation has put me in a good place mentally and increased my overall well-being. another thing i think about when picturing myself living a life well-lived is evaluating the effect i have on others. i strive to make a positive impact on the lives of others and do my best to support those around me. a word i now like to use when talking about affecting others’ lives is “accompaniment.” “to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard.” this quote in “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” explains to us what it means to accompany others and how we can support others through their difficult journeys ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). accompanying someone does not mean doing everything for them or taking control of their life, but rather it is about supporting that person and showing them that you are there for them. the best thing a person can have going for them when they are struggling is the support of another individual that they care about, so we should always strive to support those that need us in order to accompany them throughout the journey of life. one experience i look back on was when one of my high school friends got a dui. he did not have many people pulling for him, but i knew i had to make a difference in his life and support him. everyone makes mistakes, and i told him if he ever wanted to talk about anything that i would be there for him. just showing others you are there for them can go a long way in helping them through their struggles. in choosing to accompany those around us, we should also choose to form meaningful relationships with as many people as we can. “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions.” pope francis explains in “why the only future worth building includes everyone” how relationships and interactions are imperative to a meaningful life ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francismoreau fye week seven). the relationships we make throughout our lives help shape us as a person and what we stand for as an individual. we all need influential figures to look up to and emulate, while we can also be role models to others that may look up to us. comparing notre dame’s mission statement to mine, i notice a similarity in prioritizing accepting all people and accompanying them in daily life. “we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.” this quote in notre dame’s “du lac: a guide to student life” perfectly represents how we as human beings should treat each other in the world ("the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by notre dame du lac moreau fye week ten). it should not matter whether or not someone is white, black, gay, lesbian, poor, rich, etc; we must treat each person we encounter in a positive and loving way. jesus teaches us to treat others how we want to be treated, and there is no excuse to abandon that principle based on a characteristic held by the individual. as a current student at the university of notre dame, i must do my best to represent the school’s mission in accepting everyone and being a positive presence in the world today. whether that’s lending out a helping hand whenever possible or just letting other students know that i am there for them, i am in a position to represent the university and should do so in a positive way. one thing that hinders us from accompanying others is our innate nature as humans to judge others, especially those who are different from us. listening to the podcast “passion isn’t enough” really highlighted for me how to approach someone different from me and how to treat them as a person. eltan hersh said on the podcast, “instead of hating the other side, instead of hating a random person who says they're republican or says they're democrat, they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction?” he explains to us how we should approach those who share different beliefs than we do ("passion isn't enough" by the hidden brain podcast moreau fye week eleven). we do not accomplish anything by hating the other side of the spectrum. there are obviously going to be people in the world who disagree with you on major topics. hating the other side and ridiculing them does not accomplish anything besides causing more turmoil. rather, we must respect their beliefs and do our best to explain our side, in hopes that they would move their beliefs to our direction. there are way too many people in politics today who only care about what they believe that they are ignorant to the beliefs of others and cause extreme polarization throughout the country. politics is just one example of how something so polarizing can separate individuals extremely on both sides of the spectrum. another individual i look at for motivation from stopping that separation between groups is dean g, marcus cole. he said in his article published in the notre dame law school online that “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it.” cole explains a big step we as individuals must take to end the cycle of hate and racial bias: we must end the “separation” that leads to it ("'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' by dean g. marcus colemoreau fye week twelve). cole encourages us to make an effort to get to know those that are different from us. when we start to form relationships with those who differ from us, we begin to expand our circle and dive deeper into the lives of others. we can introduce ourselves to strangers at the dining hall. we can talk to people we normally don’t talk to in our classes. there are many things we can do. it is then when we will begin to realize the struggles some people have to endure, and we will subsequently be able to sympathize with them rather than prejudice against them. thinking back to my mission statement, i’ve come to realize the main path to living a life well-lived lies within the way i treat others. what will people say about me when my time on earth is done? will they say i changed their life for the better, or was i just another ordinary individual who only cared about the well-being of themselves? as my time as a first year student at the university of notre dame comes to an end, i stand here today motivated as ever to be a good person and have a positive impact on the lives of others every single day. it is then, when i truly begin to have a positive impact on the lives of others, that i will be able to say i am living a life well-lived. moreau integration 3 3/2/22 1 professor chan moreau fye 03march 2022 writing my eulogy writing a eulogy is a task that, on the surface, appears quite morbid. no one wants to think about death even if it is the unfortunate reality of every living organism, including humans. it is something that we will all have to face some day and, whether we have come to terms with it or not, it will happen. this is a question with a deeper meaning, though. it is not only meant to make one think about death, but also about the meaning of their life and what they want others to take from it. when we have passed away, we will not be able to affect people’s lives any more, but the impression we left on them during our time on earth will remain. for me, this is what the question of “write your eulogy” means to me: to share what you hope your life brought to others. learning about the life of father hesburgh gave me grounds for what a life well lived is. throughout his life, he constantly worked towards improving the world he lived in. this was especially present in his participation in the civil rights movement where he worked to push civil rights in the south. i admired how he was able to bring together the three democrats and two republicans in order to agree on recommendations for the us government regarding the effect the lack of civil rights had on people (university of notre dame)(“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two)(university of notre dame hesburgh libraries). every one of father hesburgh’s actions were guided by the will of god, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 2 which is what i valued about him. his life helped me define a part of my eulogy in which i want to emphasize my impact on others and my community. pico iyer’s text called “why we need to slow down our lives” discussed the importance of taking a break from the overload of content we take in on a regular basis. iyer compares it to standing closely to a large canvas, which makes it impossible to take in everything life has to offer (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). during a busy semester filled with stress especially during midterms week, this text has emphasized the importance of taking a step away from our technology, which are facilitators of the delivery of information we receive in our lives. i want this to be reflected in my eulogy by stating that i was a person who understood that there is more to life than school or work or social media. i knew when to step away from everything and experience life for what it is. sister theresa aletheia noble’s practice of memento mori, which is to think about death in order to appreciate life, was quite unexpected for me (“meet the nun who wants to remind you that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). on the surface, having so much emphasis on death seems morbid just as writing my own eulogy does, but it as well has a deeper meaning. practicing memento mori seems unusual for a nun, but it allows one to think about how they can make the most of every day. whether it is something simple like taking a rest day, talking to a family member, or exercising, small actions towards something meaningful to someone allows for them to make the most of their life and can even help uplift other’s lives. although sister theresa’s methods seem unorthodox, there is value in keeping an open mind towards what she believes. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html 3 when i think about my future career, i think about high school and how far away going to college felt when i was a freshman. the time to apply and plan on going to college, however, came quicker than i expected it to. now as a freshman in college, i am faced with thinking about my future career, something that seems so far away, but will arrive sooner than i expect just as it did in high school. thinking about my future career for qqc four reminded me of how short life is (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i want to be remembered as someone who uplifted and motivated others by using the future as motivation to keep going. the struggles we as college students endure make it difficult to remember what it is all for: graduation day. walking down the stage to receive my degree in mechanical engineering is my motivation for enduring the struggles, which is what i hope to share with others. my conversation with my sister for qqc five allowed me the opportunity to gain insight on what others believe i am passionate about (“discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye moreau fye week five). although she seemed to confirm much of what i believed about myself, it brought an insight about myself, which is that i seem to know what i enjoy in life. this is important to me because it has always been difficult for me to define my character, but knowing that working with mechanical systems and learning about how they work is what i am passionate about is progress towards understanding who i am. being at notre dame, though, has expanded the list of things i am passionate about. for example, i found that i enjoy learning calculus. even though i have struggled with math in the past, seeing the vast amounts of information we know about the subject and how they apply to our lives is a satisfying feeling. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit 4 the class has grown much of what i knew and makes the struggles and long hours put towards homework assignments and studying for exams worth it in the end for me. tasha eurich’s writing on “the right way to be introspective” presented an unexpected reality to me that constantly looking inside myself can actually have a negative impact on my well being (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i tend to think a lot about my actions, which helps me work towards improving myself, but these thoughts tend to weigh me down especially when i do not see myself improving. i want to be someone who is known for using the right amount of introspection in order to improve myself for others. father greg boyle’s writing “tattoos on the heart” helped me piece together the last piece of my eulogy, which is to not lose faith in people. this mainly came from when father greg corrected gato after he said he was glad flaco was hit by a car last night. gato felt regret for what he said and made it up by asking father greg to tell flaco that he hopes he recovers soon (“tattoos on the heart” by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i liked this because gato was able to accept that he said the wrong thing. it shows that not everyone is too stubborn to accept their mistakes and do what they can to make it right. for my eulogy, i want my personality to reflect this idea that people are worth giving second chances and that i was willing to offer it to them. using all of the readings to piece together my eulogy, the overall message i want it to spread is that i was a person for the people that did what i could in order to help others be the best versions of themselves. i helped people through the hard times and enjoyed the good times with them. i forgave people when they wronged me and sought forgiveness when i wronged https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007/download?download_frd=1 5 them. i did my best throughout my life to follow god’s will, which is what gave my life purpose. i knew who i was and what i was passionate about. i lead my own path in life that, if it did not align with other’s paths, did not change itself. i had personal goals for myself that i met. lastly, i want it to say that i was satisfied with what i accomplished in life. even if there were things i wanted to do that i did not do, i am still content and happy with what i had the opportunity to do. 6 works cited university of notre dame. “fr. ted's life.” hesburgh.nd.edu, university of notre dame, https://hesburgh.nd.edu/fr-teds-life/champion-of-civil-rights/civil-rights-commission/. university of notre dame hesburgh libraries. “father hesburgh: life & legacy.” hesburghportal.nd.edu, university of notre dame hesburgh libraries, https://hesburghportal.nd.edu/story-commission.html. https://hesburgh.nd.edu/fr-teds-life/champion-of-civil-rights/civil-rights-commission/ cap stone mission personal statement: how can i live my life the way god intended me to by making good decisions to live a well-lived life and only include people in my life who model these same ideals. above all being a good person at heart is what counts. the moral highground living your life the way god intended is a lot to grasp. every single person in this world has a vocation, a purpose that god has given you to fulfill. finding your vocation had a lot to do with knowing your strengths. knowing your skills and true passions gives you a better indication of what your career should be. ("text: "navigating your career journey" (meruelo family center for career development by nd career site moreau fye week four). these vips allow us to live our life to the fullest. i know from the carrier journey one of my talents is public speaking, so i try very to implement that in my life to inspire others, whether in a club or classroom setting. our god-given talents are not the only gifts god provides to live a life well-lived. our mentality is also important because how we perceive god’s world can make it that much richer. sister altheia talks about the word "memento mori," which in latin means remember your death. ("rember the nun who wants you to rember you will die" by sister altheia moreau fye week three). people think if they avoid the subject of death and only focus on the warm and fuzzy feelings of life, they will only know happiness. many forget the reason life is so sacred is that it's finite. knowing we won't live forever adds value to every single day. once i understood this concept, it changed my attitude about life. it set up the foundation for me to stop giving into the victim attitude in my life. the day i knew i only had one life, i started living the one that counted. this has changed my mentality, helping me learn to appreciate the little things more and always want to give back to the universe and the people https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html around me, even as small as complimenting them. the mentality has a big impact on how you act every single day. a big way to help improve that is through meditation, improving your quality of life. when i acknowledge that my emotions are getting the best of me, i do a body scan and meditate accordingly to be my highest self. according to a ted talk by pico iyer, mahatma gandhi was once quoted as saying, “this is going to be a hectic day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour. i’ll have to meditate for two” (“why we need to slow our lives down” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). mental health is a big factor in treating others and can impinge on our journey of living like god. there have been countless studies to show how self-reflection can help decrease anxiety. this is highlighted in a study by dr. tasha eurich where she found people who engaged in high amounts of self-reflection to be, “more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (“the right way to be introspective” by dr. tasha eurich moreau fye week six). our mentality is a significant tool to be used in how successful we can live our life, but another determining factor is how we treat others, but before we can treat others well, we have to work on ourselves. a shift in my mental health journey was when i began to realize that i have to take myself into the importance and love myself first. this impacts how i move forward in the next three years as i need to love myself before others; this will enable me to give them the full attention and affection that they deserve. to further this, treating others with dignity and respect is crucial when wanting to be a good person. father hesburgh shows this when he says “all that we cherish at the face of the great dream of america demands a dedication to the dignity of man, the god-given dignity to human beings,” hesburgh thought no matter who you were that you deserved to be treated with human decency “hesburgh movie” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). i think a big factor in deciding if a person is https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.imdb.com/title/tt8403168/ deemed to be good is if they are good at heart is how they treat others. in high school, there was a big racial discrimination problem this is what i also aim to change in the next three years; by having no biases and standing up for their justice. no person, no matter their race, nationality, or even their block, should ever dictate how you treat them, only the content of their character. this idea of equality is explained in notre dame’s inclusion statement, “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). since we are all children of god we are all supposed to treat each other as equals, so evidently not treating someone with the same respect you expect is disrespecting god. though this is tough in a world filled with different social norms depending on your geographical location. father greg boyle talks about jurisdiction and how social and innate boundaries prevent people from loving unconditionally. ("tattoos on the heart" by father greg boyle moreau fye week seven) i think that relationships we need have in life need to be more open than just friends, family, and people of similar socioeconomic status. the pope talks about how people are scared about the future and the only way to improve that is together. these boundaries set up by class, race, and sometimes gangs are destroying the future. once we let, people in they can be loved unconditionally and start a chain reaction. the harmonious action of everyone working together for a better future is the only way it can be done. these obstacles need to be destroyed now, or the world will reap the repercussions. the pope thinks that as we become more advanced in science and technology, we also could socially with equality. this is why my mother always reminded me of that golden rule treat your neighbor as you want to be treated. (“conversation with my mom" by mommoreau fye week five). hopefully, in the next three years, i will be able to treat everyone as a neighbor. even just helping your neighbor with a https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.amazon.com/tattoos-heart-power-boundless-compassion/dp/1439153159 small favor is good in itself. this is exemplified when it was stated that “the people i had so earnestly come to serve (and whose lives i had imagined transforming) had to take care of me” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i think this quote is incredibly powerful in that reinberg ended up being changed by those who he had thought he would enact change upon. to be a part of the greater common good, helping those in need fortunate or unfortunate will help the universe as a whole. it is easy for us to judge, but we have a choice, and “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do” (“i am george floyd. except i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). furthermore, to help alleviate the separation, it is necessary to step out of an echo chamber. dr. paul blaschko touched on the idea of echo chambers, and how being around the same group of people and listening to the same news stations is inhibiting people from looking at the world in different ways (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i believe it is important to surround ourselves with people of different backgrounds, beliefs, and values to explore our mindset and be more educated about the world around us. the more diverse my perspective is, the more socially woke i will be. in the next three years, i aspire to be aware of my echo chambers (which restrict my growth), extend my horizons, and keep diversifying my knowledge. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd the loss of joseph ricotta on november 3rd of this year in a tragic plane crash in bolivia shocked millions. a rising star in the music industry renowned for his generosity to others, his death felt to many as though it cut short limitless potential, but this is not the way joe would want anyone to picture it. during his life, he was an avid supporter of memento mori style philosophy. “moriar, sed morior” was one of his favorite latin phrases, which means i shall die, but i must die. he would often quote this phrase to friends and family who came to him struggling with loss, citing death as just one part of a person’s life and highlighting the importance of focusing on the good that person had done with their life (moreau week 3). when thinking of joe’s life in this manner, his generosity to others, both in his career and in his personal life, stands out as its defining feature. he brought thoughtfulness and insight into every conversation. friends and family often remarked that one would never expect this kind of deep, contemplative thought from the often wild and eccentric joe, who always took great advantage of this energy on stage in his performances and in his public image. in his free time, however, he would often be found meditating and practicing self-reflection. he credited these slow moments of his day with helping him to organize his thoughts daily to better approach his life (moreau week 1). as much as joe loved to practice meditation by himself, he equally loved practicing mindfulness with those around him. many of his close friends are familiar with his tradition of hosting a reflection dinner at his house on wednesday evenings. he would invite friends and colleagues to come to dinner together and share their life stories with others. he saw this as a great opportunity to form a strong sense of community among people from many backgrounds. he used these opportunities to nurture camaraderie from within and break down the walls presented by stereotypes and assumptions. joe spent much of his time using his influence in the music industry to promote community building as well as the idea of mutual respect among both peers and fans alike because he truly believed that a united and diverse international community would be the best possible force for good in the world. he started his global neighborhood program in 2030 to combat this issue by helping to organize volunteer groups for humanitarian crises that were comprised of people from diverse backgrounds to promote bonding through teamwork and service to others. in addition to this, joe took every opportunity to preform free benefit concerts for many other organizations (moreau week 7). joe’s passion for music was present throughout his entire life, which only grew when he learned to play the guitar during the covid-19 pandemic. music first truly became a big part of his life after he graduated from notre dame in 2025. feeling confused about where to go, he approached friends and family asking them to suggest careers that would fit him. citing his love of music and his desire to have a positive impact on the lives of others, they recommended he try his hand at being a professional musician. although it took some time of trial and error as well as a lot of discovery, this decision would prove to be the start of an illustrious career in both music and philanthropy (moreau week 5). during his career, joe released seven studio albums alongside a multitude of singles, each of which saw more success and popularity than the last. as the money started to flow when his song “out of my head” shot to top of the billboard top 100, joe became trapped in the rockstar lifestyle of luxury. his worldwide tours became an excuse to travel the world and party with the world’s elite, but after two years of this lifestyle brought him no fulfillment, he decided it was time for a change (moreau week 6). he took a yearlong break from music during which time he reflected on the choices that had led him to this point. during this time, joe discovered the value of his community when people from all over the industry reached out to offer him support during his break. this experience was very transformative for joe and cited it as the inspiration behind his wednesday dinners and even his entire organization (moreau week 2). from this point onward, joe poured his time and money into building a strong sense of community wherever and whenever he could, culminating in the founding of global neighborhood and arguably the most successful part of his career. as news of his charitable work spread alongside his music, joe shot to the top of the charts and released some of his most popular albums over the course of the next few years. it was around this time that one of my favorite stories of joe occurred that i feel perfectly shows his commitment to his work. on the first day of his fourth album’s release tour, joe was in a car accident that resulted in a broken leg. against all recommendations, joe played his show that night from a wheelchair, which he had rigged to a set of pulleys above the stage to ensure that not even a broken bone would stop his antics on the stage. in much the same way, joe never let anything stop him from forwarding his work off the stage. even when pandemics canceled concerts, joe would still be found wherever it was safe preforming volunteering to benefit research for a cure. even as his stardom began to dwindle towards the end of his career, joe remained committed to his goals and continued to tour and play shows to raise money for global neighborhood for the remainder of his life. although his life was cut short by this tragic crash, i think that we all can agree that the work joe did in contributing to the growth and nourishment of the global community is something that will continue to impact the lives of millions for decades to come, and as such, his life should be seen as one truly well lived (moreau week 4). integration three abigail donahue moreau integration three march fourth, 2022 i was never able to pray “wheel me down to the shore where the lighthouse was abandoned and the moon tolls in the rafters. let me see the wind paging in the trees and see the stars flaring out, one by one, like the forgotten faces of the dead. i was never able to pray, but let me inscribe my name in the book of waves and then stare into the dome of a sky that never ends and see my voice sail into the night.” -edward hirsch we are gathered together today to celebrate the life of . abbey, like most people, never liked funerals. unlike most people, however, abbey didn’t like them not because they dwell on death and loss, but because she thought they misrepresented it. it took her 18 years, the death of all her grandparents, the murder of her best friend’s mom, and the suicide of her high school friend for her to truly understand how to �nd meaning in a life ended. if abbey were here, she would be whispering in your ear or writing in her journal that life and death are two sides of the same coin. abbey wasn’t afraid of death, abbey doesn’t want you to be sad she’s gone. she would say the ancient greeks (who abbey studied extensively in her college years) believed a person couldn’t even be considered happy until they were dead. she would tell every single one of you that she loves you, and if you love her you need to continue living for yourself. you’ll still see her in the ripple of waves on a breezeless day, and hear her in the gritty growl of a saxophone solo. life would be nothing without death, she exists nowhere outside of your memories and she never did. as i said before, abbey probably would not have wanted a funeral. she never subscribed to an organized religion, she found this spirituality instead in individualism and following her moral compass. abbey was a dedicated and passionate vegan from age 17 until her passing. she sympathized deeply for the animals enduring factory agriculture, and for mother earth who su�ered from this continuous beratement. this dedication to a cause she was so passionate about mirrored that of father hesburgh and alumni michael hillmer ‘17. as father hesburgh once said “we all ought to be protesting against many of the things we see in modern life.”(hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau week two) for abbey, one of the things in modern life that she strongly believed needs to be protested is animal abuse, particularly in factory farms and �sheries. by advocating for veganism and plant-based diets, she found a sense of ful�llment because she believed standing up for this cause is the right thing to do. abbey believed wholeheartedly that all living beings were connected through the lifeworld and deserving of reverence. her favorite hours were spent walking through the woods with a good friend or classical playlist. she liked to sit under the trees at night and thank the universe for giving her these beautiful moments. this resolution to enjoy sitting still in nature instead of surrounding herself with the intrusive buzzing of screens re�ected the quote “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau week 1). although abbey was a proponent of living in the natural world and appreciating the beauty of earth, she was also able to balance this passion with a successful career in corporate law. the perception of the workplace and “adult life” is typically that it's soul sucking and something to dread and despise. abbey, however, saw them as complimentary. everything is nature and everything is made up of nature. beauty and harmony can be found in even the most unaesthetic and mundane places. abbey was able to �nd joy in her corporate o�ce through the interaction with her wonderful coworkers, and the “invisible hand” machine that drove her company. since eighth grade, abbey always knew that she desired a stable and traditional career path. in middle school spanish class, when her teacher asked the students to go around the room and say what they wanted to be when they grew up, she answered with feliz. for her, the end goal has always been to be happy and satis�ed with her career path. this seems intuitive, but oftentimes people become caught up in the clout or reputation of their prospective �elds, rather than if it makes them happy. although many of her peers hate o�ce jobs or more “traditional” work settings, she always knew that this atmosphere would be a productive and sustainable place for her to work. her dad, ryan, has been an airline pilot his whole life, and while he loves being able to �y and travel, she always hated the irregularity of his schedule. “everything you’ve done to this point, as well as all the interactions you’ve had with others, have already started shaping your vips.” (navigating your career journey, meruelo center moreau week four) she would say with certainty that her experience growing up in a household with a parent with an untraditional workplace has made her appreciate the traditional and successful career path she pursued. family was always an important and reliable part of abbey’s life. ever since she was a child, she strongly utilized the advice of her mom when making di�cult life decisions, such as the career https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ discernment illustrated above. her mom knew her better than anyone else, and encouraged her to chase this career path even if it wasn't the “most exciting”, because she knew it was what would make abbey ful�lled and happy. (moreau week five) she also was able to be the most vulnerable and authentic around her parents and younger brother, ted. as fr. greg boyle said in tatoos on the heart: “somewhere, in the jurisdictional locale where judgment used to claim us, a remarkable commonality rushes in, and the barriers that exclude us are dismantled.” (tatoos on the heart by father greg boyle moreau week seven). abbey also loved art, journalism, and writing. she was always looking to expand her mind and challenge herself with new beliefs. one quote she loved was “ “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in con�ict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite e�ect.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau week six) she was an avid reader and listener of the new york times, and one quote that really resonated with her was “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we �nd light in them.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau week three) this quote also described her beliefs on life and death being the things that de�ne each other. just as you cannot know what day is without having experienced night, you can’t know a meaningful life without a meaningful loss. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/523771/download?download_frd=1 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html capstone integration ryan dufour april 24, 2022 moreau fye my ideal life when i arrived on campus last august, i was mostly concerned with making friends and waking up for class, not the larger questions of life like, “how do i pursue a life well-lived?”. moreau gave me an outlet to think about these deeper questions and discern what i truly want for my life. i think that i have a good picture of the person that i want to be and a plan to pursue it. i have realized throughout this year that the most important thing in my life is my relationships. this was apparent to my loved ones as well because when i asked my mom in the week five discernment activity what is most important to me she said, “you want lasting relationships”(moreau fye week five). this was the first time that i acknowledged this as the most important thing in my life. since that point, i have tried not to ever take my relationships for granted. last week in my mission statement i wrote, “i will strive to maintain my current relationships with friends and family but also create relationships along the way”. i wholeheartedly stand by this statement and will ingrain it into my life. everyday life can be chaotic with so many different tasks to finish and small issues. one thing that has been helpful for me is to step back and look at the bigger picture. in his ted article, pico iyer writes, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our lives) really means, and to take in the larger picture”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). pico makes a great argument for this point because once you look at the broader picture of your life you realize that https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ many of your everyday troubles don’t matter at all. this has been very helpful for me and i will continue to try to keep my life in perspective. an important aspect of this practice is to accept that we are all gonna die one day. in an article written by a nun, ruth graham, she states, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham, moreau fye week three). i have taken this practice to heart. i have scheduled as many activities and adventures that i can pack into my summer as possible. i am going skydiving even though i am terrified of the idea. life is too short so i have made my default answer “yes” whenever someone wants to do something. you don’t want to go too far with this practice and then not be present in your everyday life, however. in her ted talk, tasha eurich writes, “the more time that participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have“(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week six). it is crucial to try to find out who we are as people. i consider myself a self-aware person and i am comfortable with who i am. i try not to let my mistakes or different situations weigh on me too badly because i am confident in my actions. in my mission statement, i wrote, “i will not let the worries of everyday life weigh on me too bad”. i want to be fully present and determined to reach my goals. the small problems of everyday life should have no control over me. when life feels hard it has been important for me to remember that everything happens for a reason. the career discernment website states, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!”(meruelo family center for career development-moreau fye week four). in my mission statement, i wrote “i have the goal to leave this earth in a better place than when i was brought into it”. this goal stemmed from the amazing life of father hesburgh who https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ truly made this world a better place. in the hesburgh movie, the narrator states, “what made him such an extraordinary figure is that he really didn’t belong to any side. he belonged to the side of decency. he belonged to the side of a fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind”(“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week two). this movie changed my life as i saw how big of an impact that one person could have. i strive to have people say things like this about me after i am gone. i think that one area of life that i am naturally good at is judgment. i think that as i have gotten older too i have realized that people can be very passionate, emotional, and angry, over small things. in the hidden brain podcast, the narrator states, ‘millions of americans are engaging in politics in an emotionally appealing but self-defeating way”(“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media-moreau fye week eleven). politics is a great example of things that can raise great anger within people. i have made it a goal of mine to not let the emotions of others affect my mood. if i am in a good mood then i will not let someone make me angry. in my mission statement, i wrote “i will be a beacon of positivity for everyone around me”. i want to be a person that people want to be around because i make them smile and laugh. i think that i could start by being more compassionate. i consider myself a nice person but sometimes i struggle to understand the feelings of others. in his ted speech, pope francis states, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being? (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis-moreau week seven). i think that as i look around i need to acknowledge that everyone is just trying to have a good life and try to spread love as hard as it can be. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript i want to be a courageous person in life. i want to have the courage to follow my dreams and do what i love. when writing about a time he was pulled over by a bad cop, professor marcus cole writes, “at that moment, i remember thinking that the most important thing that i could do for my sons was to survive the encounter”(“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole-moreau fye week twelve). professor cole could have easily lost his cool and tried to argue but instead, he took the high ride and decided that he needed to survive for his children. i want to have the courage to make the tough decisions that will arise in my life. out of all of the sources throughout moreau, i was touched most by the story of the boy who was gay but grew up catholic. he had to repress his feelings for a long time and then he finally told his best friend. in his article, jacob walsh writes, “the knot in my stomach untied, and i let go of the steering wheel”(“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week ten). the feeling of relief that jacob felt when his best friend was so kind when he came out to him emphasizes that we all just want to be accepted in life. i want to be there for all the people in my life and be a source of comfort and advice. in an article, professor steve reifenberg writes, “the admonition is consistent across all traditions: look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another”(“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg). i want to be there to make the lives of others better. in my mission statement, i wrote “my main goal in life is to find true happiness”. i will pursue this goal as i go on with my life. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing integration 3 integration 3 the one that will always be time goes by, and memories are created. people leave, people come, but those that impact us will always be remembered in our hearts. oscar, a father, a friend, a companion, a fighter, was a person that believed in helping others. he was a person that wanted to generate a change in others, so the world can become a better place. he represented hope, and joy, because he had the goal of generating an endless ripple of help, and unity between the human race. he is a person that will be missed, but his image, and impact will always be remembered, and will always be impactful. the philosophy through which oscar lived was a phrase he heard from father theodore hesburgh in a documentary about his life. in this documentary, father ted talks about how to help your country and mentions, “if you want to do something good, i think there is a lot of room here to do something good…. do something about it, it's your country, it's your problem” ("hesburgh" -(produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley)moreau fye week 2 ). even though this is a global example, talking about all of a country, oscar took this and wanted to start by changing himself and his surroundings. sometimes we think that we do not have to do something because it is little and someone else will do it, but if we think like that, how many more people think that? who is going to generate the change? so with this quote from father ted, oscar came to realize that the start of change is when you do it, not when you think about it and postpone it. for this reason, oscar tried to do something everyday where he could help, leading him to a deep reflection about his career and hunger for finding something in which he could help people. so with help of the text “navigate your career” by the muruelo career center at the university of notre dame ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). he wanted to combine his biggest skills and use them to help others and make the world a better place. he became a chemical engineer, and with his career created different things to help around poor communities in mexico in which he will always be remembered. during the process of trying to help, and trying to become the best version of himself, he created a lot of relationships that will not disappear no matter how much time goes by. growing with others, and being vulnerable with others whilst trying to be better is something that helps humans to become close, trust each other and become a good relationship. there are a lot of different ways in which humans can help each other, and become close. pope francis says, “yes, love does require a creative, concrete and ingenious attitude. good intentions and conventional formulas, so often used to appease our conscience, are not enough. let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face. the "you" is always a real presence, a person to take care of.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). looking at relationships that way, it is easier to appreciate and oscar really achieved that thanks to the realization of this during college in his moreau class. even though he was a man that was always working and searching for results and change, he also knew how to take a break and enjoy with his family and friends doing things he enjoyed. watching soccer with friends, playing golf with his family, and other activities that got his mind out of the world for a little while. he learned that, “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break.”("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, tedmoreau fye week 1). he said that the perfect balance between a successful life and a life that you do not enjoy is rest, and time with people you love. it was very important for him to reach out to people that were close to him to catch up and just know how they were doing. he loved being around his family and having family activities, he was a good even though not perfect example for his children and he will always be remembered for that. oscar was a person that wanted to do everything as well as possible. he had a perfectionism that would push him to the limits of his capabilities that he did not know he was capable of reaching. of course this was a great virtue of his, but it was something that would also hurt him because he would demand himself for the best all the time, without excuses. nevertheless, coming back to the help of relationships and family, he saw that virtue/defect on his older son and seeing him suffer like that for little details made him want to generate a change. so he realized that “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended questions.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences). so with his son, worked very hard to be more lenient with himself, and they both worked hard to achieve that. having the view and introspection that they are not perfect and that mistakes can happen. that is something that helped the relationship they had to flourish and make them very close, making oscar the one that will always be remembered and an example. all of the things mentioned before, are the path that oscar followed to achieve the major goal of being happy and helping those around him to be happy. he wanted to find real joy, and transmit that happiness in his life so it can spread around others. he thought that the combination of happiness and joy was the key to success, and the key to be considered someone that had a good life. he thought that “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life.” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). nevertheless, he believed that there was no way for one or the other to exist without each other. he knew that happiness was not always an option, but the feeling of joy within would always be there if it was searched for and achieved. that is why, oscar will always be remembered as a very happy and joyful person trying to irradiate others with that. oscar was a good father, a good friend, and above all, a good human being. he was a person that had a very good life, with the combination of relationships, happiness, and self correctness. oscar was an example to those around him, and will always be an example now on. he is a person that will be missed very much, but his spirit and image will never die, and will always be remembered. a good life is defined by a lot of things, but all of the things mentioned today are things that make oscar an owner of a great life. it is hard to say goodbye, but he will rest now, and go on. oscar, the one that will always be. the life of the life of there are many small moments in life that the majority of those take for granted. joey tanona was not one of those people. every day was a new mission and a new goal for him. he never took the small moments for granted. joey was always present, and that was his greatest gift from god. joey is survived by his two sisters, caitlin and meggie, as well as his wife and three children. from his early days at notre dame, he always had a kind and compassionate heart. something he held close to his heart was being introspective and mindful. a quote he always had in his wallet was, ”introspection can cloud our self-perceptions and unleash a host of unintended consequences. sometimes it may surface unproductive and upsetting emotions that can swamp us and impede positive action. introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich phd-moreau fye week six). from his time as the president of the boys and girls club, he was always mindful and took time to be with the kids and share lessons to be aware of their mental health and how to look inward positively. following his time as the president of the boys and girls club, joey retired and then became a volunteer for the peace corps. he traveled all over the world, helping those in need of help. for joey that was the most important thing in life was to help others. a rule he always remembered for family is “don’t run with scissors”(tattoos on the heart by father greg boylemoreau week seven) he believed the meaning of life was to love others more than you love yourself and to always help. while traveling the world, he found his future wife in brazil while promoting the conservation of the amazon rainforest. they would go on to have three children, two girls, and a boy. for joey, family always came first, and he loved his family like no other. joey wanted his family to have the best relationship they could possibly have. he wanted his family to feel loved and always wanted to be there for his kids. joey wanted his kids to have what he didn’t have growing up, which was a father present in their lives. nothing in the world was more important to him than his family. his two sisters, caitlin and meggie, remember him as a protector and the man of the house growing up. joey’s mother was always working when he was little, and the three of them had to learn to grow up and fast. even though he was the youngest of the siblings, both of his sisters looked up to him. they remember the time when they were very little, and joey was always feisty with the man his mother kelly was dating. joey would do anything to protect them because he believed that was his reason to be on this planet, to protect others. joey was a great athlete, and it’s what most people remember him for. his mother always wanted him to be a swimmer or a tennis player. being anything but a football player would’ve never worked for joey because he was a gladiator at heart and loved fighting with his brothers. in high school, he led zionsville community high school to two consecutive state https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 championships. he was a three-time varsity letterman, two-time all-state in football. in high school, he also threw the shotput and discus going to state in both of his respective events. following his high school career, he accepted a scholarship to play football at the university of notre dame. during his time at notre dame, he learned valuable life lessons that would translate into the rest of his life. he learned more about his faith and devoted himself to be a better catholic. as a student-athlete, he learned to fight through adversity and to never give up. joey learned how to always apply himself and to always give his best effort no matter what he was doing. the most valuable thing joey learned at notre dame was how to work with others and how to lead others and compel them to be at their best. while on campus, joey was deeply involved in community service and other service activities. he also learned that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!”.(navigating your career journey-moreau fye week four). he wanted to live life to the fullest and he understand that death is inevitable which is why you have to live every day like it's your last he learned this from sister alethia with her saying “ my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time…we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you by ruth graham-moreau fye week three) following his time at notre dame, joey entered the nfl draft. joey was a nine-year nfl veteran spending all of his time with the miami dolphins. during his time in the nfl, he learned how to compete with the very best and never fear those who may be bigger, stronger, or faster than him. he knew how to beat people with his mind and is remembered for being one of the most football-smart players ever. joey’s life was marvelous, and he loved living every second of it. he tried to live to the standard his great grandfather albert bendis lived. joey thought albert was a saint, and rightfully so. albert would ride his bike to mass every day in wildwood crest, new jersey. for thirty years, he never missed a single mass session. albert loved his wife like nothing else. he would always take care of her and do whatever it took to make her happy. joey wanted to live his life like him and would always ask himself, “what would albert do”, in every situation he was always in, he would ask himself that. he always knew how to take time and reflect a quote he always remembered was “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” ( why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyermoreau fye week one). joey believed albert was so similar to father hesburgh and took after him he sees albert when he saw father hesburgh’s writings for example, “the problem of human rights is so universal that it transcends all other problems that face humanity.” (father hesburghmoreau fye week two) how did joey want to be remembered? joey wants to be remembered as a tall skinny kid with shaggy hair from zionsville, indiana. he wants to be remembered as someone who loved living life and, more importantly, loved those around him. he doesn’t want to be remembered as some mythical creature who was a great football player. instead, he wants to be remembered as someone who had an impact on others’ lives and brought happiness into the world. joey lived life to the fullest. every day was a new opportunity, every day, and he chose to get up and be great. he will be remembered as someone who left his mark on the world and never for one second looked back. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://hesburgh.nd.edu/fr-teds-life/an-extraordinary-life/in-his-own-words/hesburgh-quotes/ integration three catherine wagner moreau first-year experience 4 march 2022 celebrate life by remembering death anyone here today probably knows that noah always loved movies. he told me once that his favorite thing to do as a child was going to the theater with his mom. one of the first things that we bonded over in our first semester at notre dame together was our shared love of movies and the lessons we learn from them. in viola davis’ oscar acceptance speech for best supporting actress in the movie fences, she said, “you know, there’s one place that all of the people with the greatest potential are gathered. one place. and that’s the graveyard.” some of you might think that sounds pretty absurd. i mean, how can someone who’s no longer alive accomplish anything? however, sometimes the best lessons about how to live a good life are learned by examining the lives of those who’ve passed. their stories might inspire us or devastate us, but most importantly, they teach us. at the end of viola’s speech, she says that she’s glad she became an artist because it’s the only profession that celebrates what it means to live a life. now, i may not be an artist or an actress, but i do know what it means to live a life and to live a life that is meaningful. noah lived a life defined by his relationships, his career as a lawyer and politician, his perseverance through difficult times, and his zeal to make the world a better place. as i’ve already mentioned, noah and i both attended the university of notre dame for undergrad. you may or may not be familiar with one of the university’s former presidents, father theodore hesburgh. if you went to notre dame, you’ll surely know who he is. he’s legendary at that school. during his tenure as president of notre dame, some of his major accomplishments were transferring ownership of notre dame from holy cross priests to the notre dame board of trustees and transforming the school into a coeducational institution by allowing for the admission of women. he didn’t just make an impact on notre dame, though. he was a strong advocate for peace and equal rights. several u.s. presidents even turned to him as a trusted advisor during some of the most daunting moments in our nation’s history. i know you’re probably wondering what father hesburgh has to do with noah. at notre dame, noah minored in the hesburgh program of public service, which inspired him to pursue a career in public service later in life. also, i think there’s a lot of similarities between them in terms of character. in a documentary about father hesburgh’s life, someone made the following comment about father ted: “sometimes we get passionate about our own personal causes or the causes we have great faith in, but he was always a person that could look at the wider picture,” (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fye week two). i think this is something that noah always strived to model, especially in his political conversations with people who had opposing views. even though noah might not have the same impact on the country and the world as father hesburgh, his commitment to recognizing the human dignity in everyone made the world a better place. “the future of humankind isn't exclusively in the hands of politicians, of great leaders, of big companies. yes, they do hold an enormous responsibility. but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us’,” “why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week. noah has always been very passionate about social change (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). it was one of the main reasons why he majored in political science in college. he had many different interests, but above all, he valued https://tubitv.com/movies/631971/hesburgh?start=true&utm_source=google-feed&tracking=google-feed https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1egpnhiehpdfetpfkf1b1nkmystmnr4g6ivpgvfygmc0/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1egpnhiehpdfetpfkf1b1nkmystmnr4g6ivpgvfygmc0/edit understanding different schools of thought and the roots of issues. he’s truly an example of the saying, “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’,” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). through his career as a lawyer and politician, noah was always a champion for defending the most vulnerable communities. during his time working for the aclu, he fought many court battles to ensure people’s rights were protected. he specifically worked on cases concerning prisoners’ rights and capital punishment. with so much going on with his career and his family, noah often found it hard to give himself a rest. he would care so much about the needs of others that he would forget to take care of himself. when he did, though, he made the most out of those moments. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape,” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). noah typically spent his rests with family and friends like myself. he had a natural longing to be in community with others, and he found strength in his relationships. however, he also found value in being alone sometimes to regroup and check in with his emotions. “mindfulness is a practice that can help build resilience and has been proven to decrease stress, improve sleep, and help regulate emotions,” (“ways to practice mindfulness” by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six). this is a practice that took a while for him to develop, but he got there eventually. in college, he was pretty hard on himself always staying up too late, going to the gym almost every day, and pushing himself past his limits. however, as plato suggests in his dialogues about the death of socrates, true human wisdom consists of knowing your limits. once noah learned this, he realized that recognizing his limits didn’t make him any less worthy or incapable of reaching his full potential. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view i want to close by relaying a story that noah once told me. noah went to catholic school, so when he was in grade school, a priest would come to their classroom once each week to talk to them, teach them, and sing with them. something that the priest would often tell them was, “someday, you’re all gonna die. you’re gonna be buried in the ground, and the grasshoppers will dance on your grave.” seems like an odd thing to tell a bunch of third-graders. however, his point was that reflecting on death helps us live more meaningful lives. “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html james demaro moreau fye 4 march 2022 integration three what defines a well-lived life? is it money? is it fame? is it glory? i’m sure the answer varies depending on who you ask. to james demaro, a life well lived was a happy one, a simple one, and a one where he made a difference. but happiness is never constant, and james was very aware of this. towards the end of his life, james eventually found true happiness. throughout his battle with this hard world, james was able to make a difference in everything that he did. he was a simple man, but he was a good man. a strong, family devoted man who was inspired to make a change wherever he went. in my opinion, james taught us all what it meant to live a life well lived. the words of father michael himes are what james lived by, “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). james worked hard to find this joy in his own life, and he was very aware that happiness was a moment to moment feeling. throughout highschool and college, james searched relentlessly for this happiness. and when it wasn’t there, he would stop at nothing to find this. he wished that he knew this during his adolescence years. as james began this hard struggle to find happiness within his own life, he began to stop looking for it. perhaps this was what he needed all along. he took time to slow down his life and live in the present. he read an article once, telling him to live life moment by moment, and it began to work. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the need for rest is so important in our lives, and james began to live by these words. moments to reflect are so important to us. however, when we reflect too much upon something, it drives us down a dark path. james had been down this dark path many times in his life. whether it was his broken relationships or just feeling down, james wished to make it a point that he wouldn’t dwell upon the past. in a study about being introspective, james learned an extremely valuable life lesson. “but to my astonishment, our data told the exact opposite story. the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). and so, he made it his mission to live his own life, not boggled down about who he had been or who he was. he made it his mission to be the best person possible and know that he was doing everything he could to be this best version of himself. no matter what anyone told him, james knew that he was good deep down, and this helped him with stress and anxiety. i believe that it’s important that we all live like this. as james said best, we only have one life. why would we dwell on the past? while it may be challenging at times, it’s crucial to our mental state to focus on the present and live life as it comes. once james learned this, the constant battle for happiness was over. he had not won the war yet, but he had surrendered. while he was not looking for happiness, he eventually found joy in his life. but what gives a person joy? is it his work? his family? people were always asking james “what do you think you most value and desire in life?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). and this was an extremely difficult question to answer. james spent years contemplating over what would give his life purpose. was he meant to prove something? to help people? during his years in college, james sat down to think about what would truly define his life. what came out of this was james dropping out of mendoza and pursuing a career in music. he began to live by the words “study what you love” (“navigating your career path” by merulo center for career development moreau fye week four). after this strong realization. james began to find his purpose. he wouldn’t spend his days fumbling with the riches of old men, he was going to make a change. and this change was going to come from the only place he knew, his heart. james changed the world with his music and began to make a difference on people in the only way he knew how. through his lyrics, james preached positivity and love. he allowed people to see the good in those around them and to treat others the way that they would want to be treated. while james never did ever get to go skydiving, he did die as “the new king of rock.” james always desired to see the good in people. this was always a crucial part of his life. in high school, i remember james telling me about a book he had read. it was about gang members and a priest who resided in gang-ridden california. one of the stories particularly touched his heart. “do me a paro, g? he says. you tell flaco that gato from the gang says i hope he gets better. i will do that, i tell him, with a smile, and a real admiration for the stretch this represents” (“tattoos on the heart” by gregory boyle moreau fye week seven). tattoos on the heart allowed james to see everyone as a compassionate and real human being. once he realized that everyone deep down was just like him, james saw the world in a completely new light. the simple act of forgiveness from two rival gangs was everything to james. from that moment on, he began to be a strong advocate for the good in the world. james was forever changed after hearing the words of father hesburgh and his bold stance for what he believed in, “rome has spoken. it was censorship, and i told them no” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca moreau fye week two). after getting the courage to stand up for what he believed in, james was forever a different man. he began to incorporate this thinking into his music and used his talents to change the world for the better. while it’s a shame that james died tragically at the age of 52, who else can say that they lived a better life? moreau fye2 integration 1 fr. keven sandberg moreau fye ii february 22, 2022 looking back on my life life is a series of ups and downs. it is both a gift and a challenge that was granted to us by god. it’s crazy to sit down and write about my life right now because i truly still feel like a young child and not an 18-year old college man. with this growth in my life, i have been starting to form my own opinions and convictions. and although there are so many things i have formed opinions on, i can tell you right now that i stand firmly with what i believe. most importantly, when i ponder about my life, my thoughts usually always travel back to how thankful i am for everything in my life. i feel that i am so blessed in every aspect of my life and it makes me so appreciative to god. i typically like to make it a habit to try my best to sit alone with my thoughts as often as i can. i’ll go and find a quiet space somewhere, turn on some nice music that i enjoy, and begin to look back on all the aspects of my life. my mind wanders and is usually always drawn to memories in my life that have helped me follow my convictions. i then start to think about how much courage i’ve expressed in my life, especially in college, and the creativity i convey every day. my self-reflection and metacognition typically begins with trying to solidify certain things about my life. these include things like getting to know who i am and figuring out what i want to do with my life. as deresiewicz said in week 1, “unless you know who you are, how will you figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life” (deresiewicz, 2014). i feel as if i am constantly getting to know myself more as a person. the growth i have experienced while being at notre dame has been exponential. it was very hard in the beginning for me. i would allow my memories of home and the “good ole days” to consume me instead of living in the present and trying to enjoy my life in the now. but, i have been slowly making progress. i have been attempting to be courageous by stepping out of my comfort zone and accepting the fact that this will be my life for the next 3 and a half years. when attempting to discern my life and convictions through looking at how my memory, courage, and creativity have played a role, i also like to ask myself a few questions. fr. michael himes in week 3 puts it simply. he tells us to ask ourselves three questions when assessing our lives and trying to figure out what we enjoy: “do you get a kick out of it? are you any good at it? does anyone want you to do it” (himes, new york times). these questions pose extremely helpful when aiming to be contemplative. because i am in the period of my life that requires a lot of discernment, it’s nice to see the important questions that i need to address being laid out in front of me in a straightforward fashion. these really help with my metacognitive process of aiming to solve out my convictions in life. i find the distinction between joy and happiness to be a topic of value in my life. because i am growing and attempting to “find my purpose” in the world, i feel that these three questions are extremely important. they also parallel perfectly with looking back on what courage, memory, and creativity look like in my life. with memory, i look back on the things that i enjoyed in life and make them the forefront of my mind. my memory helps me see the things i like and allows me to decide what i truly appreciate in my life. like i wrote in week 4, i have always been somewhat of a solo thinker. i typically like to figure things out myself and try to experience things for the first time without any prior knowledge or assistance. but, as i have been growing, i have found it to be something extremely valuable to have a mentor by my side for support and advice. having a mentor allows me to grow in my reflective leadership and it gives me courage that inspires me to delve deeper into my creativity. like daloz said in his essay for week 4, mentors “convery inspiration for the long haul” (daloz). i find this phrase to be so true because as i grow as a man and begin to gain more confidence, this confidence stems from mentorship and courage that is instilled in me. the leadership that i grow in needs to also involve me trying to make a change in the world around me. this striving to make a change in the world pairs up nicely with becoming a successful leader when i’m older. although there are extremely successful people, they are not all leaders. the problem is though that when people see those extremely successful people, they tend to think that they are leaders. like dereseiwicz said in week 7 in his essay called “solitude and leadership,” “this notion of success is exactly what places like yale mean when they talk about training leaders. educating people who make a big name for themselves in the world, people with impressive titles, people the university can brag about” (deresewicz, 2010). although success shows signs of determination and perseverance, it does not always mean that this successful person is a leader. i actually typically find that those smarter people are actually way less of leaders than most other people. yes, it does make sense that they are successful and when they get older, they will probably lead in their field intellectually. but this still doesn’t make them leaders. like you mentioned in class father, not all politicians are actually leaders. they just know how to manipulate people into thinking they are. like deresiewicz says, “there is something desperately wrong with this idea.” although it’s difficult to say, we sometimes assume that these extremely intelligent and successful people will be our leaders. but, in full honesty, this is not what leadership is about. leadership is about character and willingness. ultimately, i find it so beautiful to look back on my life and to reflect on the thoughts and memories that have helped form my convictions today. because of those memories, i feel as if my confidence has increased and that i have and still am growing into a leader today. i just want to thank you personally, father sandberg, for making this first half of moreau so enjoyable and unique. i was honestly kind of reluctant when you first emailed us when we still had like five days left of christmas break. i remember turning to my brother and complaining to him about my “seemingly strict moreau teacher.” but i was proven wrong. you are an amazing teacher, man, leader, and role model to me in my catholic faith. i really admire the way you put so much effort in class and how you write your comments for every single one of our assignments that we turn in. i look forward to the second half of the semester with you. thank you so much once again. integration three and she was love(d) there were many words to describe her—kind, caring, thoughtful. maybe throw in words like unpredictable or headstrong in there sometimes. but above all, she was love the type that made you love yourself and life. the type of love that was pure and forgiving. the type of love that saw you for who you were and made you feel comfortable within yourself. but how, you ask, could you possibly describe this love? first of all, she knew when to slow down and appreciate the finer things in life. even when her life became chaotic, she never lost sight of what was important. she agreed with pico iyer's writings, "to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you're defined by something larger." ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). she found strength in her solitude which helped her understand herself better. inside, she found someone who cared for others deeply and tried to welcome the world with an open heart and mind something she hoped to do for the rest of her life. and what is love without hope? she always tried to look towards the future with optimism. even when cynicism was favored, she did her best to trust others and remain hopeful. she lived for every day, one step closer to making her dreams a reality. it was all an attempt to give her best shot at the one life she had. and even when she knew that her time would come, she had the same musings like fr. hesburgh, "i'm thinking about eternity. i'm looking forward to the next stage of my life" ("hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). she wanted to lead a meaningful life, so she could embrace it with no regrets and know she had lived when her time came. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143779 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 but what drove her to live her life so wildly and passionately? what encouraged her to live her days out, not caring about what others thought? to defy the rules and barriers she was told to obey? the answer to her desperate need to live was her self-awareness of death. she never feared death but instead saw it as a companion to life. if one knew that there was no death, there would be no reason to live. just as sister alethia believed, she thought, "remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful." ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). and with death keeping a watchful eye on the clock, she spent her time making every second meaningful. taking that extra second to hold the door open for someone, to squeeze in a compliment, or to hold her temper in difficult situations. and for everything she was, for every laugh, every concerning gaze, and every sigh of relief there was an experience behind it. she was love a product of everyone who had loved and had yet to love her. she was a product of her life's journey that came with every struggle, defeat, and accomplishment. she did not realize it until later in life, but "every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!" ("navigating your career journey" by meruelo family center for career development) moreau fye week four). only in her second semester of college did she realize how many people she had met impacted her college journey. and the multitude of experiences that had allowed her to grow into a more robust and better person. she realized that she was not the same person who had entered college over six months ago…so she embraced it and all the new experiences to come. but what did others think of her? indeed, you cannot face the journey alone, and many individuals played a role in helping her discern her life. when she asked others for aid in https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ discerning her life, they all had plenty of things to say ("week five discernment conversation activity" by moreau fye week five). her best friend of fourteen years described her as hardworking and dependable, someone who could be trusted to have your back and confide in. of course, her mom said she was an amazing daughter, but one who was persistent and not deterred by failure. what did the boyfriend have to say? she would never be satisfied or fulfilled in life until she achieved her goals. she was touched by what her close friends and family had to say about her. it felt good to hear that she was loved and her efforts were appreciated. and so, she tried her best to make a meaningful impact on many others. she tried to make a lasting impact on new friends she met around campus in class, at school events, even in the dining hall. her hope was that if anyone agreed on something, it was that she was an amazing person to be friends with. now you all may ask, for someone to be so kind, they must not have experienced the grief and horror of the "real world," right? well, she was no stranger to the obstacles of living a life well-lived. all she knew was that it was possible to overcome any obstacle that stood in her way. she had held on for so long, and it would be a shame to give up now. she was not someone to give up when things got difficult; it was all she could do to "just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet." "5 minutes" by aria swarr moreau fye week six). she knew that everything would eventually pass, all the good days and all the bad days. and when she was faced with new challenges, she knew they too would pass and she would continue living. wow, that was a lot. so how exactly do you describe this girl? was she the girl who talked to the person sitting alone in a room? the girl who noticed when the slightest thing was off and invited a friend to talk? or was she the girl that anyone could always turn to? we already https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143863 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143863 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143880 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143880 know the answer to all of these questions, but do you want to know who she really is? the purest answer is this: she was the girl who understood that "one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense." ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). she wanted others to know they were loved because she knew how it felt not to be. she spoke to the person sitting alone because she remembered what it was like to be that person sitting alone. it was easy to notice when her friends seemed off because no one saw it in her, and she once had no one to turn to. for the greater amount of her life, she felt like her life was meaningless. but she fought. she fought the long battle, the brutal battle. and she stood on the winning side. she had believed for so long that her life was not worth living, but at one moment, she decided it was worth living. and by anything, if not everything, would she live a life well-lived. ultimately you become whoever would have saved you when no one did. her whole life, she so desperately needed and longed for love…and so she became it. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 integration three a letter to myself, a letter to my future dear audrey from august 2017, as you are probably aware, you’re about to start high school. this is kind of ironic because on the first day you’ll have to write a letter to your future self. i’m very tempted to tell you all the things i wish i had done, and all the things you are going to fall in love with. but i don’t think that would be the best way to go about it. early on in the second semester of freshman year at college, i completed a reflection activity about the first semester. one of the questions was “what could you do differently if you could?” (pause for reflection activity moreau fye week one). it can be kind of frustrating to think about what you regret, but i think there is something more powerful about regrets than just obsessing over something from the past. i’ve learned that they are motivations for the future. things i love doing now in college are mostly things i regretted not doing in high school. if i told you what those things were, it might take you on a completely different path. i think some of these things, if i had started them earlier, i may not have had the same experience that i do now. what i’m trying to say is that regrets can be an important part of a life well-lived because they are essential to learning what that life would look like. that being said, i will offer you this piece of advice. i know there are some things you are thinking about at this moment that you really want to try that you already regret not doing. my advice is to just go for it. this is going to sound really morbid, but you are going to die someday. when that day comes, your regrets have no future. you want to take advantage of the things you learn as soon as possible. remembering that you eventually won’t be able to do some of these things can be an important push to finally take that leap. think right now: what must you do before you die? or think on a smaller scale: what must you try before high school or college is over? thinking about this can help you create goals that focus your resources more in the right direction (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). that’s a heavy piece of advice i just threw at you. you may be asking, “how the heck am i supposed to figure all this out?” to that i suggest you begin by thinking about this: “if you knew you couldn’t fail, what would you do?” (“7 clues an interactive assessment activity” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). if you don’t focus so much on the fear of failure, you’ll be surprised at what you’ll find. i took a one-credit irish dancing course last semester for fun. i was kind of scared that the class would be full of professionals and that i would look dumb. but i’m so glad i didn’t get stuck on the fact that i could “fail” (at least relatively), because it turned out to be a class full of students looking for something fun and crazy. we all bonded over the fact that we didn’t know what we were doing. something that goes hand-in-hand with this is the advice to not focus on what you can’t do (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). i’m currently experiencing this as i’m applying for internships over the summer. as i read job descriptions, i get scared about the qualifications i don’t meet and about the criteria i cannot fulfill because of what’s on my resume. but my mom always reminds me that the qualifications employers ask for are often hopeful and not set in https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 stone. things like that should not make me think i don’t have a shot at a job. the moral of the story is that there are so many factors to situations that what you believe you “cannot do” is a miniscule problem that should not bear a significant amount of weight. now it’s time for some more internal advice. i had a discussion with mom about what she thinks my personal qualities are. one of the most surprising things she said is that i have good leadership qualities, but i don’t feel the need to exercise them because i like being in my comfort zone (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5). i think this already relates to what i’ve been talking about this whole time: try to get out there and try things without fear of anything. i am in no way a role model of this yet, but i have some plans. i’ve been assistant stage manager this entire year for pasquerilla east musical company. i am completely comfortable at this position, and i love it. but sometime next year (perhaps when the current stage manager studies abroad), i am going to apply for the stage manager position. mom also knows that i want to be on stage but i’m afraid to audition. so i’ve told myself i will audition at least once by sophomore or junior year. i think it’s important not to feel pressured to do things right away. just making a plan or a goal is a good way to ease into new things. high school is going to be stressful, fun, and it will fly by in seconds. try to stay true to yourself and attend to your needs. remember that “the most loyal thing you can do is to be honest” (“hesburgh” moreau fye week 2). you are going to have trouble making decisions about who to hang out with, what activities to do, and all that. it can be scary to learn you may want to quit doing something that you’ve been loyal to all throughout your life–i guarantee you a major one of these decisions is going to happen, but you need to come to that decision on your own. just be honest with yourself. a well-lived life is not one-size-fits-all. make sure you don’t let others get in the way of your own decisions, hopes, and dreams. some decisions will make you feel isolated, but it’s the hope that everything will work that matters. remember that “hope [begins] with one ‘you.’ when there is an ‘us,’ there begins a revolution” ( “tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). right now you have many hopes. just know that i’m right there with you. we are already an “us.” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjpj9owemw%2fsur74vwhefmarbdvi0s30uj76auzzxyseo%2fx4%2bzct68d2%2b32surj1mie3%2fvneeqya61y9p5ohug5b%2flrajljo9xkvvaocvxbluprqkziqqmkej%2fjilv7nc7kmyt%2bgionzsbyjgxriqihlsevjq%2blnm%2fjtijt0tbprjmkyprkk%2fixi5bbrrvpr8qj95ye53jymjfnak3ppbw8n%2fplen1f8mmgd9didnzwgrqedxmh8ykr2stjpz%2bs96%2bbyx1rtjgr8ogirv%2frkbhizditbamgelukcq%2b%2bv2qhhhw2x7rptdnmwo%2bmqemahalujlwsm8w3tqh4yn9ring%2f3dzx%2fx2zzdgccnzacyeg%2bg7cbtylvvdjcf2x7d19ckty0crveincjte3ezgpqhwiznd40carzm8sonetixfd0ufp7bskm0%2bhbnhdhfug%2f1wu%2f4cw%2bf%2fenvipjjdhkx5c72pzy6vvjvq0lb7eoza%2bjnu7pkybz2%2byf7%2fb%2fdc%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=yaxvnxwbh7vkbqwhsnhmlu2syvgwh1cmzhuido6%2b4rfitnvqmhcmrllpqixrtt77jnzbnv%2be4hz3884tofugdzktqch0qgusgorpseonfl0afe9%2fnohtigfcrfvtjfkdlwyzfthuub4x2wettava9igumth%2fts0fi7mptuww42c8q9%2b%2bnl%2b8edw8%2fzfip338qdf1g2wx%2fhxd2ge5jij0cxqpsxpzhplxgznibv6kgthw1%2b8xmcqzusmx8vpcpgjk7dd%2b4ur3wlw1p%2bsrpqvwn3dhmg0wjilkbyjyz1y%2fykoenkqq%2f6knxig7tt08gyvjg2j2b1tro5of0k2upu%2fvqg%3d%3d https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817?module_item_id=167946 integration 3 fr. kevin sandberg integration three 22 february 2022 being me, bravely. courage is something i can safely say i have struggled with for the majority of my life, unfortunately. sometimes i just think that i was born and wired as an anxious kid. time and time again i would feel myself ruining my family holidays by refusing to partake in activities that would in any way scare me. i just could never see past the terror to the fun that everyone else derived from the likes of skiing. it was probably at the age of ten or eleven that i felt the anxiety take over my life and my parents' life. i had been in and out of different therapists for anxiety for years but i just never really clicked with any of them. when i was fourteen i finally met a great one and i am eternally grateful to my parents for not giving up on the search for someone to help me. my anxiety and complete lack of courage improved greatly over the course of the following year and things were looking up for me. on the day after my sixteenth birthday, one of my close friends died in a car accident and our worlds changed completely. his death was a huge turning point in my life. i knew i couldn’t afford to live in debilitating fear anymore, not when life is something so precious that can be taken away from us at any minute. i also adopted the mindset that if anything were to ever happen to me, i would be with my friend forever. to be completely honest, i thought the change in my attitude towards fear would come instantly after shane’s death, but it took a while. i slowly embraced life for the beautiful thing that is. i felt that i slowly stopped asking myself why i was afraid of everything. i believe that this is where the extract on “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich in week 6, came into play in my life. i had https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ to stop beating myself up, and just try to go with the flow of life that everyone else seemed to be doing. when i suggested to my parents the idea that i go to college in america, they were absolutely shocked. i know they were, but they didn’t really let this on to me, instead they encouraged me all the way, getting me any help in the process that i needed. the whole process was completely foreign to me and my family but regardless i spent a year working on my application, and working hard in school. the day i got into notre dame was very emotional for my parents. they always tell me how proud they are of me, but this was different. i honestly don’t think they ever envisioned a life where i would go out bravely on my own. because of the covid regulations, my parents weren’t able to travel to america to move me in, and this made me nervous but i got through it. the scenes in the airport when i was leaving were something else! my whole family stood crying and laughing that this was me leaving all on my own. but here’s the thing, i really didn’t feel alone, i naturally felt nervous but i was completely empowered. in the extract that we read in week one from william deresiewicz’s “the students”, the author comments, “such is our image of these enviable youngsters, who appear to be the winners in the race we have made of childhood”. i do completely agree that we are “enviable youngsters”, but i would strongly argue that there is so much more to all of our lives than just something to envy. being here, for so many of us, might be something that we completely never imagined for ourselves. in a way i might have ‘won’ the race that is childhood, but to me, this is only the starting line. sometimes i have to stop and pinch myself and think, wow how lucky am i to have this wonderful place to learn from and to act as the launchpad to the rest of my life. i feel that i have had a few main mentors that have helped me get to the point in my life that i’m at today. in week 4, we read “the gifts of a mentoring environment”, by https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/pages/read-the-students-by-william-deresiewicz?module_item_id=145460 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/580889?module_item_id=180911 sharon daloz parks, and my view on mentorship was completely redefined. the mentor i had for a very short amount of time, had the biggest impact on my life. similar to in the extract my “most positive learning experience was not only in one-on-one learning contexts, where, for example, an individual student might work with a professor in an office or laboratory setting”. the time that this mentor had the biggest impact on my life was in a group setting. i was doing work experience when i was sixteen in one of the main stockbroking firms in dublin, davy. the woman overseeing the program took a liking to me early on for some reason. we had a group stock pitch to complete for the end of the week when we would present our pitch to the head of equity in davy. susan, the program organizer, put me into a group with three boys from the course and i immediately started worrying about how i would get a word in with the boys. susan pulled me aside before we met with our groups and explained to me that it was such an important skill for women in business to be able to handle and work alongside men. this was probably the first time my creativity shone through in a real life setting, but it was a challenging task. the boys were funny but i found myself having to be the leader from very early on. our presentation ended up going very well, although we didn’t win the competition. all of our parents came to watch our stock pitches, and after the competition susan pulled my mother aside to tell her that she envisioned big things for me. i am forever grateful to her for challenging me in a way that i would never have pushed myself. this is certainly my understanding now of a real mentor. she inspired in me, a long term creativity to go further in achieving my goals. i have many fond memories of secondary school but one of the most prominent memories that stands out to me is the time that i took part in the lighthouse leaders program. this was a program started by my vice principal when i was seventeen and it will forever be one of my favorite leadership experiences. we went through six weeks of training before me met the kids. during the training we learned all about servant leadership and how each one of us was called to be a servant leader. this new concept was fascinating and amazing to me, it was completely about putting other people first. it is a skill that i will be able to take with me for the rest of my life in all aspects of leadership.every friday we would take a bus to the primary school near our school and teach them about making their confirmation. we guided them through the process and the meaning behind everything through program workbooks. we would sing with them and laugh, and most importantly just have fun with the whole experience. it was hugely rewarding when the team attended the service of light for our kids to show them that we were here for them. the end goal of the program was to attend their confirmation, but unfortunately coronavirus didn’t allow for this to happen. in week 7, we read “solitude and leadership” by william deresiewicz, which talked all about courage and the changing role of leadership. throughout the extract they talk about being physically vs. morally courageous, which i think is so important. the idea of courage crops up again! the author talked about being able to stand up for what you believe in, which really resonated with me and i will make a conscious effort to do this from now on. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/580893?module_item_id=180915 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35982/files/580893?module_item_id=180915 moreau integration 3 moreau midterm integration the path to success: reflection and growth how would i define a life well-lived? what steps have i taken to achieve a life well-lived? what can i change to continue on my path to a life well lived? reflecting back on my experience so far in life, and especially throughout my first year of college, i have gratefully encountered many enriching experiences. at the same time, as with everyone, there have been moments of struggle and difficulty, but it is important to realize that these are learning experiences – the sun will always rise again. in a life well lived, i believe that i must fill my surroundings with people i enjoy, be continuously driven, and be challenged to grow to my full potential. with this, however, i also think that a life well lived is one with balance – one where you are not pushing yourself too hard, and where mistakes are looked at as learning opportunities. not everything needs to be planned out perfectly – as long as there is a drive to keep moving forward and improving in life. with this definition in mind, i believe that i have taken many steps to reaching a life well lived. primarily, i have emphasized the importance of making meaningful connections with others – ones that mutually bring joy. at the same time, i have reached to make a variety of connections, instead of just staying in my comfort zone with past connections i have already developed. when i came to notre dame, it just worked out that my group of closest friends in my dorm are all a part of the business school. not that this is at all a bad thing, but, being in the college of science, it left me needing to make lots of new connections in my classes – not ones that were just simply class friends, but real meaningful connections so that i could have people to collaborate and study with. while it required me to step out of my comfort zone, i have made some lifelong friends through my classes, something that might not have happened if i wasn’t forced to reach out. while this is just one example, surrounding all areas of my life with people who are supportive and bring me joy has contributed to my life being well-lived. as my mom said in our phone conversation, she perceives me at my happiest and at my best when i am brightened by the people that surround me (maribeth coyne – moreau fye week 5). while this sort of deep connection is greatly important, it nonetheless is important to be kind to everyone i am around, whether i know them well or not. as mentioned by pope francis “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). having this sense of kindness and open mindedness is greatly important to creating a tied community, one that will aid in constantly lifting my spirits and pushing me towards my goals. the other main aspect that i believe i have accomplished that has pushed me to a life well lived, is always having a drive to achieve. as mentioned in the description of domer dozen member kiersten dehaven ‘14, “resourcefulness, relentless drive, and service have guided [her] throughout her young career” (“the domer dozen” by nd alumni association – moreau fye week 2). drive provides for achievement and growth – all things necessary to continue pushing your potential. a key part in finding this drive is to find something you are passionate about, something that pushes you to want to continue growing and learning. i entered notre dame as a biology major – something i really like and still enjoy, but this major left out a big part of what academically interests me, math and computer science. because of this, after my first semester i talked to older peers, my mom, my advisor, and did a lot of research, and eventually became greatly intrigued by the acms major. while still being in the college of science and requiring basic science courses, i also get to take more classes involving computational math. this semester, although difficult, i am greatly enjoying my courses and am excited for the rest of classes yet to come. as stated by father michael himes it is also important to “look for the task that will continue to stretch you” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). i am undoubtedly learning and growing immensely as a product of my classes, while also being able to find joy in them. while those are a couple examples of things i think i am currently doing to lead a life well-lived, there are still many things i can work on. as i am sure is the same with every student at this school, i have a problem with overloading my schedule. between classes, clubs, research, athletics and work, i struggle to find time for myself. at the same time, i constantly find myself thinking that if i am not doing something that is contributing to my future, i am wasting time. being able to take a pause throughout the day is https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145635 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145635 https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 crucial to having a good mind set. as described in pico iyers’ ted talk,“the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyers moreau fye week one). as mentioned, having time for oneself is extremely important, as it leads to a better mindset and ability to keep moving forward on a daily basis. while this is something i need to improve on, i have attempted to begin scheduling one activity for myself everyday. whether it be setting time to go for a run, taking a second to listen to music and clean my room, or sitting down to call a friend from home, it is activities like this that will create a balanced and healthy life. along with creating good mental habits, it is important to know that setbacks in life are inevitable. as said by undergraduate career services, “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services – moreau fye week 4). life is anything but linear, there are so many factors that are out of your hands and unpredictable. with this, it is important to remember to be open minded and to never let setbacks or challenges permanently put you down. a week ago, in the midst of midterm week, i became very ill. i had a fever, was extremely exhausted, and couldn’t do anything to be able to concentrate on my schoolwork. with lots of assignments coming up and exams to study for, i became very upset. why did this have to occur now? how was i ever going to be able to finish everything while also needing to take time to properly get over this sickness. despite this setback, as i am currently finishing this integration, my last assignment before spring break, i know that the next day will come. setbacks are common occurrences in life, ones that will eventually be overcome and may even result in personal growth. reaching a life well lived is something that takes continuous reflection and growth. i strive to recognize the things in my life that i find joyful, and continue with those practices. i also strive to recognize areas that don’t bring me joy, and see what i can do to change those. through this all, i hope to always stay connected to god. as said by aria swar after his injury, “as i began just thanking god and be more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ and hope” (“5 minutes” by grotto – moreau fye week 6). reflection leads to an opportunity for growth and an opportunity to keep moving towards your full potential. as i continue through my journey at notre dame, i strive to make it one filled with reflection and faith – things that will guide me to success. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/modules/items/145602 integration three 3 march 2022 moreau no matter no distance, it’s the ride yes, the process of writing your own eulogy is a macabre and difficult thing to do. by nature, a eulogy is a document that’s supposed to narrate the entirety of your essence in life. all of your feelings, your thoughts, actions, and relationships. what’s key to the idea of a eulogy, however, is that it’s told through the lens of the people who you interact with and who you presume know you best—you don’t get to tell it yourself. knowing that, the exercise of thinking about what your eulogy would entail is a painful process, because it forces you to consider the parts of yourself you’re not showing to the world. it forces you to ask the question: “if i died today, what would they say?”. and it forces you to scrutinize your actions in the here and now. that’s what makes this difficult. to remove the anguish—which is sometimes a necessary feeling—from the exercise of contemplating what your eulogy would read, you can analogize the document to a strong analysis of what a life well lived would look like. so what do i think a life well-lived looks like? i’d like to imagine that, when i look back at this essay in 30+ years from now, i’ll laugh at what i’ve written—who am i to say what a life well-lived looks like when i’ve only lived for roughly a fourth of my life? how should i know what will bring me fulfillment once i’m in the later years of my life? i'm normally resistant to the pattern of treating my future self with a sense of “otherness” which implies that my current self has little to no control over the person i’ll be in the future. after all, the person i envision myself becoming in the future is directly and intrinsically related to the person i am now. the “best, future” version myself isn’t someone else. it’s still me. with that, i try to live my life daily knowing that a changed version of myself doesn’t come without…change. so therefore, we must be able to define a well-lived life in terms of where we are right now, not in some distant future. this can be a tall order to ask of college students, whose lives can often be filled with stress, which “the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating ‘will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century.’” (ted, “why we need to slow down our lives”, moreau fye week one). so, paradoxically, i’ve set out to do the following: study hard, perform well, launch a career, keep stress levels low, be a good person, and somehow be able to pursue a life well-lived in the here-and-now. how can this be justified? i think it’s all about framing. as a young, first-semester freshman, i thought that i had to make a bunch of changes in my life in order to be happy. between the ending of my senior year of high school and the beginning of college, i was able to adequately identify that i was becoming a very unhappy person—far from living the good life. so i began to look for the solution to this unhappiness. spoiler alert: i didn’t figure it all the way out. but now i think i have an idea. i think it has something to do with framing. there are moments when a life well-lived seems like something so elusive that it was never even meant for me. moments when i feel unworthy of love, companionship, and contentment. i’m really good at being my own worst enemy. i think this places a huge barrier on living a good life. in one of my favorite songs, “fare thee well”, marcus mumford writes that “life ain’t worth living https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ without the one you love.” aristotle made the same argument about friends being a necessity to achieve ultimate happiness. fr. ted hesburgh (who inarguably lived a good life) was said to be a “bridge builder between people and god and among people.” (narrator, “hesburgh”, moreau fye week two). simply put, a life well-lived involves other people. so when i tell myself otherwise, the good life seems impossible. i’m not sure why i can sometimes slip into the mindset that i’m unworthy of friendship, but when that mindset fades, i feel like i’m living well. when i can change my frame of mind into a more hopeful place, i begin to feel a well-lived life taking hold. for that reason, i’m a fan of the method of turning away from the “why” questions and choosing to ask “what am i feeling right now?” (tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective”, moreau fye week six) it’s about framing. i think that a life well-lived would be characterized by less self-resentment and more acceptance of the person that i am. another large barrier to happiness in my life and in the lives of many college students has much to do with the question of what i’m doing with my professional life. i think i’m similar to many others when i say that i have no idea what i’ll do with my degree. this can often cause a lot of anxiety and prevent me from living in the present (a tenet which i believe is integral to living well). once again, though, i think this problem is solved by framing. though i struggle with accepting this idea, i like the notion that “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you." (meruelo ccd, “navigating your career journey” moreau fye week four). additionally, when i can remove the mindset that not knowing what i’ll do professionally is a scary thing and turn to the mindset which recognizes that having professional flexibility is a special thing, i begin to https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules#:~:text=external%20url-,text%3a%20%e2%80%9cthe%20right%20way%20to%20be%20introspective%20(yes%2c%20there%e2%80%99s%20a%20wrong%20way)%e2%80%9d%20(tasha%20eurich%2c%20ted%20conferences),-activity%3a%20complete%20one https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules#:~:text=external%20url-,text%3a%20%22navigating%20your%20career%20journey%e2%80%9d%20(meruelo%20family%20center%20for%20career,links%20to%20an%20external%20site.,-activity%3a%20complete%20the recognize that i’m living the good life right now. i once had a lacrosse coach tell me that “pressure is a privilege”—a quote i’ll never forget and which i believe can be applied to being a college student in the position to choose any career i want. furthermore, i can often forget that the pursuit of a vocation is an indefinite process. as fr. himes notes, “there is no point where you can say, ‘the issue of my calling is settled.’ vocations lead to vocations!” (fr. michael himes, “three key questions”, moreau fye week three). yet again, pursuing a well-lived life has much to do with framing. restated again here, i don’t know exactly what a well-lived life for me looks life. i don’t know what it entails specifically nor how to track it down. but i think i have an idea of what it feels like. guided by the principle that once i can break from the frame of mind of living “as the buddhusts say, in the ‘illusion of separateness.’” (fr. greg boyle, “tattoos on the heart”, moreau fye week seven), i think the good life picks back up. i think that “one of the keys to doing it right, i’m finding, is to embrace the uncertainty of [life] and to continue looking for what makes me happy.” (myself, moreau fye week five). i recognize that i’m living through what could be one of the happiest times of my life, but that the entirety of a life well-lived involves leaning into the day-to-day pursuit of what i find makes me happy. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules#:~:text=attachment-,text%3a%20%22three%20key%20questions%22%20(adapted%20from%20fr.%20michael%20himes),-week%203%20qqc https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules#:~:text=attachment-,text%3a%20%22three%20key%20questions%22%20(adapted%20from%20fr.%20michael%20himes),-week%203%20qqc https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/modules/items/168024 week 8 integration brendan mcginn the life of a fruit fly i’m not saying brendan’s life only had the value of a fruit fly, but the path was very similar. a fruit fly starts as a larva, which is fairly helpless and relies on the materials of its parents to survive. that, too, is how brendan’s life started, as does every child’s. but as the larva becomes an adult, it must learn to adapt quickly to its environment. once the fly spreads its wings for the first time, it enters a whole new world. brendan spread his wings by entering notre dame. while the instincts and values he learned as a child helped guide him, those first six months in his new environment drastically changed him. the first change brendan learned to make was to slow down. life at college moves at a thousand miles per hour. learning how to appreciate the smaller things helped brendan enjoy his life more and thrive more in his environment. by taking time to himself and not stressing, brendan was able to find the things he really loved in life and take steps to reaching his full potential ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i remember one thing that really impacted brendan’s life was a movie about father ted hesburgh he watched. he told me about how much he admired father hesburgh’s passion, and how much he was able to get accomplished by being open. brendan kept this idea close to his heart throughout the rest of his life. he found a passion in sharing his love for technology with those who did not have the same opportunities he had. he was open to working with anyone, whether it was a tenured computer science professor or a janitor who had never touched a computer, since knew they all had value to add to his mission ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). i can only imagine what he could have accomplished if he had the time. https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 brendan lived by a principle that he could go at any time. unfortunately, he was right, but this mindset helped him appreciate every emotion, every experience, every failure and every success ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). brendan knew how to see optimism in darkness by simply asking questions. he never said this, but after every win and every loss (like that time he failed a linear algebra test), i could see the contemplation in his eyes. he was wondering how the event impacted his life and what his life really was ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3) . if i had to guess, i think he came to the conclusion that everything in life matters, but his life shouldn’t be taken too seriously. he tried to enjoy life while it lasted, and now enjoys eternity in peace. one of the hardest parts of losing him is not being able to see what brendan was going to be able to do with his life. he had so many different paths that he could have taken. brendan would spend hours reflecting on what he could do with his life. honestly, he had no idea, but he was excited to explore. he kept trying new things to see what would stick, and all paths seemed to flow back to something with computers. i remember one time in high school he was messing around with these things called hololenses. i could see the lightning in his eyes and hear the thunder in his voice. i sensed this same atmosphere when he told me about the prosthesis club he had joined at notre dame. he found something he loved and that would help people, and was just starting to explore it ("navigating your career path" by mfccd moreau fye week 4). his curiosity and energy always lead him in the right direction. while brendan would have loved what he did, i know his favorite part would have been the relationships. he loved working with other people in just about everything, such as his boxing club and football team. that was his favorite idea about engineering. one time, he spent https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144741 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ three hours going through some database online finding people who he thought did interesting things and reaching out. he called his father after doing which, who reinforced his ideas about his future ("discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week 5). he told brendan that life is full of possibilities, so it is important not to be distracted or overwhelmed. brendan knew to focus on the relationships more than the job itself. he was finding his way in his world, and would have done great things. one way that brendan changed the most in his short time at college was learning to look inward, as well as outside. in high school, brendan only ever looked at what was in front of him. whether it be a football game, a big test, or a fun weekend, brendan was always worried about the exterior things in life. when he got to college, he realized how unfeasible that really was. in high school, he could always be one of the best at what he was doing. failure did not occur too often. but at notre dame, that simply was not possible. he had to learn to appreciate interior success and feelings, rather than just the exterior ones. he learned how to look at himself so he could understand and appreciate himself ("the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). in life, brendan was learning how to love himself for more than just accomplishments, which was going to be essential in his growth. one of the final parts of brendan’s transformation as he spread his wings was learning to appreciate all the new experiences and people he was encountering. before brendan went to college, his life was fairly sheltered. then, in a matter of one weekend, brendan met people with more varying experiences than he ever had before. he met students from different countries, religions, lifestyles, and so much more. i remember brendan telling me this was his favorite part of college, but it sometimes overwhelmed him. he would be scared that he was not nearly as interesting as the rest of the people here. if this made brendan turn away from meeting new https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 people, his college experience would have been a failure. however, brendan embraced the newness and grew from all of the new people ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week 7). he became better, more interesting and well-rounded because of the people he was meeting. perhaps the greatest tragedy is that the rest of the world will never be able to meet him. the life of a fruit fly all starts the same: as a simple larva existing in the world. as it grows into a fruit fly, it must quickly adapt to a new world. brendan lived a similar life. he started in a simple, safe childhood, but quickly matured as he entered college. in this new world, brendan adapted and changed to make himself the best he could possibly be. as the fruit fly begins to fly, though, it enters a dangerous world. very few flies ever live to the end of their natural life. they live one moment at a time, but no fly can adapt forever. unfortunately, brendan’s tale parallels the fly. while there are many aspects to this tragedy, perhaps the greatest is the lost potential. i sit here wondering how far he could have gone. he certainly believed he was going to change the world, and with the incredible growth he had displayed in his first months at college, i have absolutely no doubt he would have.. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144759 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144759 w8 integration life’s a journey to leave your mark today we gather with sadness in our hearts to remember the life of . however, she wouldn’t want today to be filled with darkness, rather she would want today to be a joyful remembrance of who she was, and that’s why i stand in front of you today. to remind you all of sarah’s life and how she managed to leave a mark on each and every one of us. i want to start off with a quote by fr. greg boyle: “we discover our true selves in love” (tattoos on the heart, fr. boyle, moreau fye w7). to me this quote screams sarah’s name as she showed us what it means to be loved without judgment. from an early age, sarah always was making friends with those she encountered. she made people feel seen and heard because she knew what it was like to once feel alone and invisible. when she was in 8th grade, she lost her close circle of friends and that stuck with her. so during her time at notre dame, she eagerly set out to foster friendships and find her place. i know some of her college friends are gathered with us now and can recall the day they first met sarah. it was during the chaotic welcome weekend that sarah met her two best friends to this day, spencer and gracie, who helped sarah enter very positive relationships. during her time at notre dame, sarah also made it her goal to be actively involved around campus in clubs and organizations. sarah’s college experience seems to be inspired by the idea that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out there and experience life!” (navigating your career journey, center for career development, moreau fye w4). that is exactly what sarah did. in an effort to explore her identity, she took advantage of many new opportunities to learn about herself and not let the college experience pass her by. for instance, some of her fondest memories include cheering on the football team at every home game, joining compassionate care in medicine club, and meeting new friends in all her classes. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/modules/items/167944 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ sarah’s life was also characterized by her constant pursuit of knowledge. she wished to learn so that she could teach those around her, and that played a big role in her involvement in service during high school. throughout high school, sarah became a member of a service organization tutoring refugee students in downtown chicago. this experience connected her to those in need of educational assistance and helped her in finding her passion to give back to her community. she always remembered the young boy, amir, that she met at the library and the conversations they had. as she taught him math and how to read and write, he left her with touching stories about how he’d come to america seeking a new, safer life but also missed back home. in this way, sarah was learning from him just as much as he was learning from her, and she found the value in unexpected relationships. during her academic career at nd, she dove into challenging classes with an open mind and was determined to succeed despite the possibility of failure. although her classes presented her with obstacles to hurdle, she recognized that there was support available. she learned that vulnerability was okay, and within just a short period she was already forming a relationship with her organic chemistry professor. that class in particular presented her with challenges, yet she was able to overcome them through her self-advocacy and the ways she sought out help. as you can imagine in her younger years, sarah was a busy young woman. however, in the wise words of pico lyer, “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break” (why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer, moreau fye w1). even though sarah was accomplished, the business of her life led her to struggle with anxiety since she didn’t give herself a break at times. however, through these moments, sarah began to realize the importance of seeking balance and finding time to pause and rest. this was a primary reason sarah became so invested in the active minds club at notre dame which tries to spread awareness about the https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ realities of mental health disorders. she didn’t want people to have to struggle alone and was determined to encourage those around her to prioritize their well-being. she had many conversations with her ra maryann at the end of her hall regarding the ways she could implement new practices into her life to relieve stress. the weekly “tuesday tea time” was a routine sarah looked forward to every week as it allowed her to relax after a long day and practice self care and compassion with maryann along with other girls in her hall. sarah also had a liveliness similar to that of notre dame’s fr. hesburgh. inspired by the ways that fr. hesburgh left his mark on notre dame and beyond, sarah strove to leave her mark as well. she took inspiration from the following words of fr. hesburgh: “we need a systemic change. one man isn’t going to solve the world’s problems; we need to unite together” (hesburgh, jerry barca, moreau fye w2). sarah clearly felt compelled to make the world a better place. she felt like she carried a responsibility to work for change, and so she united alongside others, specifically to promote sustainability. at notre dame, for instance, she joined greend in an attempt to educate fellow students on how they could become more eco-friendly. when i think of sarah, what immediately comes to mind is her smile and her ability to make me laugh. she wished to brighten people’s days and touch others with positivity. her grandfather once told her, “you light up the world whether you realize it or not” and sometimes that was hard for her to believe (discernment conversation activity, moreau fye w5). however, family was everything to sarah, so she was greatly touched by those words from her grandpa and took them to heart. from a young age, sarah always talked about one day building a family of her own. she cherished the time she spent with family and made so many memories growing up alongside her three siblings. however, when her grandma died during her senior year in high school, it really left sarah feeling alone. she felt as though she couldn’t move on in a https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 world with her grandma no longer in it. but sarah soon began to live by the motto, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities that we find light in them” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die, sr. aletheia, moreau fye w3). after that hardship, sarah began to see the world differently and encouraged others to do the same. she no longer feared the ups and downs in life, but transformed difficult events into opportunities for growth. as i’ve previously mentioned, sarah saw the world through a positive lens, but that wasn’t always easy. growing up in a relatively competitive environment both socially and academically, sarah often struggled with self-doubt. she felt like she lacked certain skills when comparing herself to others. however, that also changed after sarah came across dr. jihoon kim’s story, where he reflected on his life following an accident that left him paralyzed. he once said, “i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do already instead of what we do not yet have” (“five minutes,” aria swarr, moreau fye w6). sarah lived her life with that same energy and overcame many obstacles down the road by adopting that mindset. she no longer looked at herself in terms of what she couldn’t do but reminded herself of all the blessings she did have. i hope my words today have spoken to the essence of sarah, and i hope my words have been a reminder of the impact that sarah’s life had on so many others. to me, sarah’s life serves as a symbol for a life well-lived and sets an example for others to follow in her footsteps. sarah will be remembered for how she made others feel and how she treated those around her. she will always be remembered for her open-mindedness and her compassion. she was a friend to everyone she met in all types of different relationships. when confronted with challenges, she leaned to family and wasn’t afraid to ask for help. but above all, sarah’s life was characterized by her willingness to promote change, and she will continue to be remembered for how she made a difference in our lives. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 thank you and god bless. writing this eulogy forced me to reflect on what i’ve done in my life up until this point, and it also made me really think about who i want to become and how i might achieve a life well-lived. for me, a life well-lived means surrounding yourself with those you love and care about while also finding connections with those you might least expect. in god and the good life, which i took last semester, i was also challenged to think about what constitutes an ideal life. after taking that course, i started to question how i can achieve happiness and fulfillment in my daily habits, and i came to the conclusion that it was through spreading love and fostering community that i felt my best and found purpose. with this in mind, i want to continue to grow as an individual through the rest of the semester, and one goal i have set for myself is to join a club that i wouldn’t have previously considered. i have never really been one to be super creative, but i would love to join a club such as arts under the dome. i also hope to show more support for the organizations and sports teams on campus that may not receive as much recognition because i want to bring the notre dame community even closer. so, i would love to attend a tennis match or go to one of the dance company productions, which some of my friends are involved in. i also am deeply interested in wanting to better promote my mental health, and i am currently working towards journaling before bed as a way to practice gratitude. i hope to keep this practice going moving forward. lastly, as we have focused a lot on discernment this semester, i challenge myself to think more seriously about what i want to do, career-wise. i know i want to do something in medicine, but this semester i really want to learn more about research opportunities within the neuroscience major so i can explore possible interests and fields of study. have a great break! 4/27/2022 knowledge is power earlier in the semester i stated that my mission statement was going to be that i was going to do anything i could to acquire as much knowledge as possible. while i do not think that this single statement will be able to sum up every single thing that i want to do in my life or dictate exactly how i am going to act in every single setting, i still think that it will serve as a good mission statement for me. especially for the next three years at least, after i graduate, i may choose to change my direction to an extent, but that time is still rather far off. i came to the conclusion that this should act as my mission statement because after i lot of thought i found that gaining knowledge is one of the few things that i always enjoy. i do not really have many other things that i could classify as hobbies, so i have started thinking that pursuing this goal could serve as a hobby of sorts. of course, i would not seek to simply gain knowledge without at least attempting to put it to good use throughout my life by using it to try and solve the problems i see. to help people with their problems i would likely have to acquire the knowledge of how they live quite directly exactly how steve reifenberg describes when he talks about the time he spent trying to help the less fortunate in poorer countries but ended being helped by them (https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3shrs30/edit?usp=sharing by steve reifenberg, moreau fye week 9). this concept as my mission also is what led me to choose my major here at notre dame. i found that my chosen major of biochemistry gives a unique insight into the mechanisms by which living beings operate and how the world around all living beings works. it is a major that also confers a lot of information that could potentially be used to help other people someday. however, i do not just want to gain academic knowledge, even though it is generally the most useful, i also want to try and acquire knowledge at a more societal level. what i mean by that is trying to gain knowledge to get an insight as to how the people in our society function at an individual level and how that affects society as a whole. to do this i try to do what dr. paul blaschko recommends and avoid echo chambers; i do this by trying to find places that involve a mixing of different ends of political and social spectrum, or, if that is not available, i seek out places that represent the two different ends of the spectrum to compare the two and try and understand how each functions separately from each other (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd by dr. paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11). so far what i have learned from doing this sort of thing is that every single one of us has inconsistent ideologies, or we at least choose to ignore certain aspects of the things we support, but that is not inherently a bad thing if we looked at everything with such an extreme degree of nuance, i doubt anything would get done because there are negative aspects to everything. as i mentioned before, i do not want to be idle with any knowledge i have acquired, while learning for its own sake is good, i still would like to try and find practical applications for anything that i have learned. there are countless ideas on things we could do to improve this world we live in as demonstrate by the wealth of ideas that msca symposium gives, and those are only ideas that have been generated at notre dame there could be countless more all over the world (https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/mscasymposium/#summaries, by notre dame, moreau fye week 12). all of these projects require all types of knowledge to pull off, technical knowledge to design and create new things, logistical knowledge to successfully implement these ideas, and social knowledge of how to get people to participate in these ideas. i hope to one day have enough knowledge in various subjects to actually be able to significantly help ideas like these to come to fruitions, be it through technical knowledge or knowledge that can help https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/#summaries https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/#summaries these ideas become reality through some other mechanism. of course, i want to help every type of person that i can with any knowledge i have gained. just like the spirit of inclusion at notre dame, i would want to help everyone that i possibly could no matter where the come from or who they are (https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ by notre dame, moreau fye week 10). i realize that my personal mission statement may differ somewhat from a lot of other people’s mission statements, but in truth i have never really had any super defined goal of ideal that i have been striving towards in my life. my plans for the future have always simply been “get into a good college”, “get a well-paying job”, etc. so i had goals but nothing explicitly defined, more just ideas that i wanted to get to. so, far i have been fortunate enough to be able to achieve my vague goals, but i cannot imagine that that will always be the case and as such i would like to be able to set a somewhat tangible and defined goal. i have found that i do enjoy learning about just about anything, as such i figured that this could make for a good goal and mission statement for the time being at least until i find something a little more concrete to make my goal. if in pursuing my current goal i do acquire enough knowledge that i can actually make somewhat of a difference and help some people then all the better. for now this will remain as my mission statement but i hope that some day i will be able to change my mission to something more specific or defined so that i can have an actual goal to strive for rather than just some far away ideal. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ integration 3-sem 2 2/26/22 professor alison thigpen moreau first year experience how will i be remembered? when i originally thought of the question “how do i want to be remembered when i pass away?”, i immediately did not like it. i tried not to think about it. this is often a scary question to ask myself because i feel like i haven't done enough to be remembered as anything amazing. i thought about how i haven’t really accomplished much or seen all things i want to see in the world. when i thought about the question again and in a deeper sense, i realized that i don’t really need to be remembered as anybody who did anything life changing, i would just want to be remembered as a good human being. being a good human being may look different for everyone, but i think that my values showcase the kind of person i would want to be remembered as. firstly, i would want to be remembered as someone who was reflective and self-aware of my life. i think one important aspect of a “life well-lived” is to be able to slow down and step away from our busy lives. as ghandi points out, we need to take time away from our work and meditate more when we are very busy (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). one sign that i have lived out this aspect would be when i am able to step away from my schoolwork and my professional work life and be with my loved ones or in self-reflection. this is essential to living a peaceful life, and i would want to be remembered as someone who lived a peaceful life. another facet of my life that i would like to be remembered for would be my ability to “get in a room with a bunch of people that didn’t agree with anything and bridge all that” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). father hesbrugh was someone who always tried to overcome differences and have meaningful discussions with others. i think that living a life-well lived involves being able to hear others perspectives. even though i admit that i am stubborn many times, i wish to be able to bridge gaps in the future between people that disagree. i feel that leading a life well-lived must include the central aspect of joy, rather than happiness. father micheal describes the difference between joy and happiness by saying that joy is the sense of rightness in the way you are living your life, while happiness is more about external factors, like hunger, sleep, and illness (“three key questions”-moreau fye week 3). in my life, i want to be remembered as living joyfully because i wish to have a sense of rightness in my actions, especially in the way i interact with others. in addition, i wish to be remembered as a risk taker, who isn’t afraid to try something new because of failure. when i was completing the 7 clues assignment, i remember being taken aback by the question “if you knew you couldn’t fail, what might you most like to do?” (“7 clues: an interactive assessment activity”-moreau fye week 4). oftentimes i am so worried that i will fail that it stops me from trying something new, but i think that a life well lived requires me to take risks and try new things. at my death bed, i hope to be able to have done what i would most like to do if i knew i wasn't going to fail. when having a conversation with my mom about something that is difficult to say, but i need to hear, she told me that i need to learn to ask for what i want (“week five discernement conversation activity”moreau fye week 5). i thought this was very true because sometimes i get too nervous or embarrassed to ask for something i really want. sometimes i feel as though i don't deserve it or it's not the right time to ask, but honestly, like my mom said, the worst thing someone can say is no. for me, this is something that’s very important to a well-lived life. one sign that i have accomplished this in my life is when i feel confident in asking people for help. i want to be remembered as someone who wasn’t afraid to ask for what she wanted. it will definitely take a lot of time and effort to gain this confidence, but it is something that i strive for. furthermore, i want to be remembered as someone who overcame obstacles with grace. similar to the way the man that lost his ability to walk and other motor functions in the film “5 minutes” was able to overcome his sadness by thinking positively about what he did have, i wish to overcome my obstacles by being appreciative (“5 minutes”by aria swarr, grottomoreau fye week 6) . it would be easy to have lived a good life if you were never posed with obstacles. i wish to be remembered as someone who comes back when they fall, and learns something from it. i think a good sign of this is when i do not have any regrets about the bad things that have happened in my life, and that i wouldn't change anything about the unfortunate circumstances. this would imply that i made something good out of the bad situations in my life. i think that above all i want to be remembered as someone who treated everyone with dignity and respect. in the ted video, the pope said “the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week 7) . in my life, i do not want to treat anyone as if they are a number or a statistic. this has a lot to do with the famous golden rule that was ingrained in me growing up. i feel that serving others and treating them right is the most important part of having a life well-lived. in sum, my values direct the way in which i want to be remembered when i pass away. this includes self-awareness, open mindedness, true joy, risk taking, confidence to ask for what i want, and overcoming my obstacles with grace. the most important of all these facets for me is being remembered as someone who treated others with dignity and respect. moreau integration 4 4/28/22 a guide to becoming a hero and being successful ever since i can remember i have always wanted to be a hero. wearing my suit, i would fly across the city helping and aiding clothes with my super powers. the people would love me as i could make great friends and connections. growing up, i quickly realized that obtaining these powers is impossible, but the acts of a hero are still attainable. there are various examples of this including father hesburgh. same as father hesburgh, i have had the virtue to have had a great life, however i don’t let this get to me as i always try to make time to help others. “you are a very attractive man and have a great sense of humor [...] i wonder if being single is not often a distraction by the women you may get who may generally admire you as a person?”. (“hesburgh”moreau fye week 2). father ted always made time to others and this was a direct correlation to his success. this is one of the aspects of being a hero, making time for others and not caring as much about yourself. in order to network with others, especially these days, you should always try to let go of your devices and put yourself out there. put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives”moreau fye week 1). cell phones disconnect us to the outside world, and limiting our interactions with others decreases our chances to live a good life. heroes also search for the happiness of others. in order for a person to be happy or do something which makes them feel good, everyone should also be asking themselves various questions. ”is it a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and giftsengages all of your abilitiesand uses them in the fullest way possible?”. (moreau fye week 3). by implementing this happiness upon ters, you open doors to create relationships with them, and eventually you will have a community which will bestow the same happiness they give you. heroes also take into account the situations they are in, and they do everything in their power to set themselves up for the best outcome. they train their abilities and do what is necessary to get the best version out of themselves. this way their success will bring them happiness and a better life. (week 4). i have done everything i can to set myself up for the future as i have done everything i can to get good grades and i am attending one of the best schools in the world in notre dame. heroes also have to take into account their flaws and recognize them so they can improve upon them. this way they wil not fail again and live a better life. in week 5 we were asked to talk to someone about our flaws and strengths. i was told that i was too competitive and sometimes i take things too seriously. building myself on these flaws and making myself a better person will make me more successful. in order to become a hero, you must know what you lack, and know your limits in case there is anything that doesn't go your way. by getting to know yourself better you are able to move on and be successful. you have to also recognize how your emotions work and what is good for you. in the article the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich, talks about the relationship with finding yourself and success. “similar studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content.” week 6. heroes also do not discriminate as they try to be a part of a large community. “sometimes we strike the high moral distance of judgment moving our protective jurisdictions far from each other. this is also, largely, the problem in the groupthink of gangs.” week 7 heroes do not belong in gangs as they will include everyone. being from puerto rico, i have been a part of a community which has been exposed to many different races and cultures. “we prize the uniqueness of all persons as god’s creatures. we welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated.”. week 10. heroes belong to everyone, they should never limit themselves to saving only some people, as they should work for all of society. no matter the socioeconomic status, race, religion, culture, all these factors should not matter when helping others in something you are good at. “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,” he said at the workshop. “this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard.” solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward. “ . in week 9 of moreau, we discussed how a hero is supposed to also help those without a voice. there are many people who are helping other which don’t attend these people when only a helping hand from at least one day can make their lives just a little bit easier. heroes also prevent themselves from being in an eco chamber as they are open to all opinions. in week 11 of moreu we discussed that “i think that's right. some people probably would agree that, yeah, you know, being on twitter all the time or sharing a meme about some silly news story is entertainment. but the feelings that they bring to politics are much deeper. they care, and they feel hurt that politics isn't going the way they want it. and they feel joy when politics does go the way they want it.” by being open to all people and opinions, you will live a good life in peace, as you will gain knowledge in all areas in order to be familiar with everything and be able to form many intellectual thoughts. this way you can appeal to all kinds of people when you initiate a conversation. heroes also try to get along with anyone. typically in movies you can see them demonstrate hatred towards one person, the villain, but in real life mostly they work for the common good of everyone. “i am convinced that men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other, and they don’t communicate with each other because they are separated from each other.” week 12. having courage is a big part of living a good life, as you are in peace with yourself and the rest of the world. i believe i posses all these qualities of living a good life and to be a hero, but i have to find the profession which could fit these characteristics. in week 13, we wrote about our vision for the future, and i saw myself being and orthopedic surgeon. even though i most probably won’t be saving lives, i will be helping people to recover from injuries and help them reach their physical peak once again. at the end, a person’s smile is all that payoff. with this in mind, these characteristics are all a hero needs to be successful. not only will they allow you to be a hero, but also to live a good life. spending time not only focusing on what makes you a better person, but at helping others as well is what will bring you countless benefits for the rest of your life. i might not be a hero wearing a fancy iron man suit flying through a city, but i might be one using my stethoscope and lab coat, and with helping countless people i will indeed live a good life. integration three integration three march 4, 2022 a life worth living i believe that there is a certain type of beauty associated with life. my conviction is that a life worth living is a happy life and that no one but you knows what that looks like. living out a happy and fulfilling life sounds easy in theory, but it is much harder to enact. we are constantly weighed down by others’ expectations, societal rules, and the pressure we put on ourselves. this past year i have learned to value my own happiness over anything else in the world, because in the end i am the one who has to live my life, and i don’t want to deprive myself of living a life i am not inspired and motivated by. i want to embody my conviction that living a happy life is the greatest accomplishment one can achieve by encouraging others to follow their hearts, even when it might be difficult. i hope to serve as a role model for younger students to carry on this conviction. i hope that as i continue to learn about myself and what makes me happy i will feel more confident in myself, allowing me to be a more effective leader. i believe that learning more about myself will allow me to connect with others on a deeper level and form truly meaningful connections. this semester i have really struggled with finding a purpose at notre dame. i am enrolled in a rigorous course load of 20 credits on an engineering and pre-med track, and no matter how hard i work or how many hours i spend in the library, it always seems that i am falling further and further behind. i didn’t have to take 20 credits this semester, but i chose to because i would rather bombard myself with assignments and school work than have free time to think. my biggest fear is giving myself time to think, because i know if i do i will come to the conclusion that i am unhappy. my classes are tough, and my grades aren’t as high as my perfectionist self would like them to be, but these are things i could deal with if i had an end goal in sight. the emails in my in-box from my academic advisor remind me that the deadline to declare my major is looming on the horizon. each day i tell myself that after i finish this essay or take that exam i will finally sit down and map out my different major possibilities, and each day i find another thing that needs to get done and i push that conversation away to have with myself at a later date. i know that declaring your major freshman year of college is not the final step, i know that i can change my major later on and that i’m not bound to this decision for life, but to me, it feels like i’m going to make the wrong choice, and then have to live with that decision. the main reason why i’m scared to make a decision about my major is that my whole life and my entire education has been built upon doing my homework, getting the answers, and acing the test. as deresiewicz explained in his book excellent sheep, students are conditioned to excel but, “nothing in their training has endowed them with the sense that something larger is at stake. they’ve learned to ‘be a student,’ not to use their minds” (deresiewicz 2014). i know how to be a good student, what i don’t know how to do is use my mind. i don’t know how to discern my major because that answer isn’t on quizlet and i can’t memorize a study guide that will ensure that i choose the correct answer. i am working on being kind to myself and teaching myself to think because i know that this will enable me to find happiness and fulfillment in my life. in the article “the right way to be introspective” eurich explains why asking yourself “what” questions rather than “why” questions promotes self-awareness. “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (eurich 2017). instead of accusing myself and asking “why can’t you just pick a major,” i want to change my inner narrative and instead ask myself, “what brings you joy, and what is something you want to share with others?” i am passionate about journalism, reporting, and storytelling. i love learning about different places, cultures and experiencing new adventures. i am excited when i meet new people. i want to travel and continue to improve my spanish-speaking skills. i am interested in learning more about how i can become involved in healthcare policy and help solve problems in medicine. these are things i am excited about and want to explore further. at the moment, i don’t know what i want to do with my life. i don’t know who i am, but i am starting to learn and am excited to embark on this long but rewarding journey. the answers to my questions and inner struggles “can only be found within--without distractions, without peer pressure, in solitude” (deresiewicz 2010). i don’t spend a lot of time in solitude, considering the majority of my day is spent on schoolwork and any remaining time is spent mindlessly scrolling on social media. i want to challenge myself to be alone with myself, to allow my thoughts to wander, to really ponder the world around me. although this will be difficult and uncomfortable in the beginning, i am excited to see what i will learn and how this will increase my inner happiness and awareness. i not only want to learn more about myself, but i want to learn about others around me and how i can impact someone else’s life. pope francis says that in order to do good, we need memory, courage, and creativity. my fondest memories are spontaneous summer adventures. these memories are associated with feelings of having no cares in the world and they are times when i was truly present in the moment and experienced pure joy. i want to strive to achieve this feeling in my life and find a child-like sense of wonder and excitement associated with the work i do. in order to do this, i will need to have the courage to be content with my own version of happiness, rather than defining my life based on someone else’s happiness. when i inevitably become discouraged and question if a happy life is worth it, or even attainable, i will need to have the courage to push forward, even when it feels impossible. the last component of doing good that pope francis touches upon is creativity. i have very few creative outlets in my life, and this is something that i want to change. i want to allow myself to explore different forms of self-expression like writing, painting, and photography. these things will challenge me to break away from the things i have been taught and trained in by my education, and they will also enable me to see the world from a new perspective. this combination of memory, courage, and creativity will not only allow me to learn about myself, it will also help me to be more aware of how my life is intertwined with others around me. pope francis said, “quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone's existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (francis 2017). although i am working to learn about myself and discover my inner convictions and happiness, i am not doing this just for myself. by challenging myself to live a life based on my own definition of happiness i hope that i will feel secure within my own identity, allowing me to serve as a leader and bring different groups of people together. works cited deresiewicz, william. solitude and leadership, 2010. deresiewicz, william. excellent sheep. free press, 2014. eurich, tasha, and al gore. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) |.” ted ideas, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. accessed 3 march 2022. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” ted, 25 april 2017, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_build ing_includes_everyone/transcript. accessed 3 march 2022. integraton phyona adelheidis schrader’s character that inspirited moreau 3/3/2022 phyona adelheidis schrader’s life was well-lived. phyona was real. through her knowledge and awareness, she built her life off of the joy of life. she loved herself and the world around her and was not afraid to show it. she did not let social norms dictate her or her instagram. every moment was a lesson in her eyes. every step was for a purpose, for the betterment of herself and the people and world around her, but even though she was so thoughtful, she could let go and be the life of the party. she built herself up by knowing where her limits were and pushing them. she did things her way, and for her purpose, she valued her time. this is why she found success. she saw the great things and terrible things as they were and always made the best of any situation. she believed in god’s plan with all her heart. from phyona’s realness, she brought others to do the same, and she never wanted to be known by her resume. she knew the true meaning in life was to connect to god through her challenges and lessons. she found worldly success from them, but that was never her goal. though phyona wasn’t big into social media, she loved expressing herself on it. our world has become a show of who can put on the best face in so many ways. this was never phyona. “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves.” 1`("why we need to slow down our lives" by (pico iyer, ted) moreau fye week one) but this was the opposite for her. she never let the outside world dictate what she should be because she knew she was the best, but she was humble. this kind of confidence was and is untouched. she was a goddess that brought herself lower than others in their eyes to build them up. humble and confident and secretly competitive she was. from the outwardly insane celebrations on the volleyball court to wearing bright orange pants and rainbow shoes to class three days in a row, she never hid. phyona prioritized her connection with herself. people were very important to phyona. through phyona’s time at notre dame in college, she learned many things, but she would say many of them were from the people. father hesburgh:“ he wasn't perfect either, and he wasn't afraid to admit that” 2 ("hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week two) someone she looked up to greatly. coming to notre dame, she realized how important people are, and she never looked back. she knew that people also have the same garbage in their lives and living without hiding was so much better. so, “she wore her garbage.”(from nf, one of her favorite rappers). being real pulls away the walls between others. phyona connected with people because she knew love is the meaning of god. as pope francis said, “ we all need each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) moreau fye week seven), community and listening to others and asking for help. i don’t think she could count the number of times she was told, “don’t be afraid to ask for help. there is no reward doing it alone.” and she took this in. she brought light to even the most of strangers just by a single friendly wave. god would say she loved her neighbor as herself. she listened to her needs: her needs to grow to god and strengthen herself for him. phyona had the ability to view herself and see her mistakes with that same confidence. one of her most important lessons learned and finally acted on was listening to her needs. this doesn’t mean she would eat peanut butter when her body craved it. this means she always acted on what was best for her future self. she learned to have joy, not happiness. well, she most certainly was happy, but not all the time, and she loved that. “happiness and joy are not the same. joy is a process of good things, and happiness is a feeling in a singular moment.” ("three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) moreau fye week three) joy builds great people with great passions and drive to do better in this world. the power in her ability to forgive because of so much vulnerability to herself, but she knew strength does not come from holding yourself from the damage; it is to embrace the pain and call it good. everything was “for future phyona.” this included her rest. when her mind needed a distraction, she listened. never again, she promised to ignore and forget: neglect herself. phyona saw life as what it was. even the negatives were loved by phyona for she could see the big picture of god’s plan. she found her purpose. knowing her purpose and enacting her purpose brought her peace. throughout her life, she bounced her ideas of religion but never did her trust and love in god falter. phyona thought. she thought a lot. with her powerful mindset, she could notice the cracks, the unnoticed things, and this fact alone was what brought her closer to god. she was strong because she did not let herself fall into the mind-numbing trap of following the crowd. the only time phyona let her mind rest was from intentional meditation. her mother always said she was a thinker. she was intentional with everything she did; she took everything and everyone into consideration. she fought for what seemed, to many, didn’t matter. phyona took her steps with her purpose. every decision was for her future self. because she knew her purpose, she let her daily attentions guide her to her best self. no step is too big in her eyes. “you may just have the zoom-out view on” as she would say. each step in her life, whether big or small, was to her best self. phyona actively solved problems, actively questioned things, and always kept her composure in the process. no matter what happened, phyona told herself, “it’s going to be okay. it’s going to be ok.” (“5 minutes” (aria swarr, grotto) moreau fye week six) in the long and hard processes, she took action and spoke her thoughts out loud. there were times of tough decisions, but she let god lead in those moments. in the time of doubt, she knew the information she had at the time was not enough, and she was patient to let it come. she never let her stress overtake her because of her trust in god. the memories of phyona adelheidis schrader will never be forgotten. her strength, care, honor, and humility will stay in our hearts, for she put a new perspective on this universe to anyone that knew her. moreau integration moreau fye capstone integration not a perfect life by any means but i’m working on it my new mission statement after reflecting on everything i have learned through moreau and my experiences this first year at notre dame would be one full of forgiveness, trying new things, and dedication. i will dedicate myself to balancing time with my family, my friends, and doing school work or actual work. i will remember to try to have some fun and not be so serious all the time and create stronger connections with the people i interact and care for. i want to be better at forgiving others and trying new things. i will try my best to “live like a saint” as my youth group leaders used to say. i learned from their lives and will try to live a life her patron saint, maria goretti, and the lord our father would approve of. i will be dedicated to never stop questioning things that interest me. this continuous persistence of knowledge is a spark in me that will never go out. finally, i will be courageous in acts both big and small to stand up for what is best for herself and the people around her (mission statement by moreau fye week 13). finding ways to balance everything going on in my life has always been a hard thing for me to do. many times i believe that myself and everyone around me gets too caught up in everything going on. i have been told that i never let myself relax, which is a fair statement because at any given moment i have around 3 to-do lists and 15 reminders set on my phone. i feel like i always have so many plates spinning in the air and i am trying my best to not let them all come crashing down. these plates include all of my numerous roles such as daughter, sister, girlfriend, friend, lyons hall president, student and club member. but like it was said in the https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1byvnmgih73bvwcl7lkfof6ropjzgp-5ttgj_cjqngza/edit article “why we need to slow down our lives” that the unhappiness in life is because someone cannot sit still in their chamber. the article also said, “researchers in the new field of interruption science have found that it takes an average of twenty-five minutes to recover from a phone call. yet such interruptions come every eleven minutes — which means we’re never caught up with our lives” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico ilyer moreau fye week 1). this is why for my next three years at notre dame i am going to start scheduling times for myself to be relaxed. this could be silent medication or a silent walk around the lake. in my mission statement i mentioned i would try to have more fun and be less serious all the time. it has taken me a long time to realize perfection is an unattainable goal. i used to idolize doing everything i could and being “perfect”: the perfect student, child, etc. i now know after failing many times at doing things here at notre dame that it is ok to not be perfect but it is not ok to give up. in the movie hesburgh, father hesburgh said “he wasn’t perfect either and he wasn’t afraid to admit it” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca & christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). through the failures and struggles we are able to appreciate the good times more. the article from week three also says this in a great way, “actually, facing the darkest parts of life is where we find the light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to know that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week 3). in my next three years at notre dame i will be pushing myself to try new things, push through the failures and to never give up. i have made a goal for myself to connect with more people and look into new exciting opportunities within my career path. i have always been ok with connecting with others but i was never vulnerable enough to create these extremely deep connections. through moreau i learned that i need to explore and connect with a lot of people to learn more about my career. the career development website says, “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144732 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144736 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process” (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). this is a hard concept to explain to my parents because they don't understand the business world that well and think a major must lead directly into a specific job title. in my next three years at notre dame i will dedicate myself to researching opportunities that are a good fit for me and educating my parents more about these opportunities and what i want to do. i also want to grow my connection to other because the pope said ““quite a few years of life have strengthened my conviction that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7). this means the more connected i become with others the happier existence i will have. with balancing my schedule this must be done with a good purpose as if i only do it to suit one need then it is done with the wrong intentions. in week 9 there was a great quote about this, “in many ways it was a cautionary tale of the many things that can go wrong from misguided good intentions” (“teaching accompaintment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenburgmoreau fye week 9) by scheduling my time with good intentions i must try to make sure my physical, mental and emotional needs are being met. in my next three years at notre dame i want to try to live out the parts of my mission statement that says to live like a saint and to do small and big courageous acts. this first year at notre dame i mostly just went with the flow and did not necessarily put myself out there with my beliefs. i did this because i was scared of not being able to make friends. however, i now know that learning new things and interacting with people of different beliefs is very beneficial to my personal growth. in week 6 there was a quote from an article that helped me to realize this. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144759 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144764 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144764 the quote was, “the lesson here: asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6). in my next three years at notre dame i will become more involved in causes i believe in such as the right to life club. i will make sure to reach all of my beliefs and always be open to discussions with people from opposite views so we can both learn from each other. i do not want my beliefs and involvement in politics to become a shallow thing to just be posted on a social media story. in week 11 modern involvement was described as shallow in this quote, “we live in a 24/7 cycle of political news that saturates every corner of our culture. it seems like this has led to an increased engagement in politics, but eitan hersh says that engagement with politics for many of us has actually become more shallow” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain mediamoreau fye week 11). i have not registered to vote yet but i am planning on registering soon so i can participate in voting during my next three years at notre dame. finally, in my next three years at notre dame i am going to “let the walls i had built to prevent vulnerability, slowly come down” (“growing gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10) and do caourgaous acts both large and small. at the beginning of this year i sheltered myself from truly being there with others because i was scared others wouldn’t like me but in the next three years my walls will be coming down. to keep my walls down i will do what my mother says i always do and continue to question everything to no why and if something is a no i want to see if i could change it to a yes (discernment conversation with tracy albertsonmoreau week 5). in my position as lyons hall president next year i am going to encourage others to participate in volunteer efforts and participate in dorm culture as well as https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144767 https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1-8agvoxx9exkds5zvyehtfx9ddzkganhcfj5jg-ngv4/edit events. as marcus cole said, “these are things that i, in my position, can do. but it is not enough. i cannot do this alone. each of us must do what we can, wherever we are” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by marcus colemoreau fye week 12). my first year at notre dame was not perfect and my next three years at notre dame won't be perfect either but i will never give up and never stop growing as a person. capstone integration mojica 1 professor lassen moreau first year experience 19 april 2022 legacy of love my personal mission statement encompasses many of the ideas that we have examined this semester, especially as i look to the future. ultimately, to create a good life that i can look back on and say was well-lived, i am dedicated to the pursuit of a better world, one that i will be proud to leave behind. in order to accomplish this, i hold myself accountable for all my actions and own up to every consequence. i have an innate duty to seek out the truth in an honest and genuine way, working to avoid racism, xenophobia, homophobia, nativism, sexism, and other injustices that plague our world. ideally, i will be able to fight these injustices through my future career, whatever it may be. i surround myself with people who challenge my viewpoints, who push me to solidify my own beliefs. i do this because i cannot understand what i really believe unless i am challenged by people that i respect and admire. it is in these moments of discomfort that i am able to learn the most. with these solid foundations of beliefs, i will find ways to challenge the people around me to expand their worldview so that they might pursue their own life well-lived. my success is measured by the impact that i have on the people and the world around me. that will be my legacy. i will continue to foster healthy and reciprocal relationships that can both boost my confidence when i am feeling down, and humble me when i lose touch. i continue to push myself to grow in wisdom and inspire those around me to courageously challenge the status quo, even when it is hard and seems impossible. life was not meant to be mojica 2 easy. i take on this mission statement because i love this world and will fight to encourage a better future from it. each piece of my mission statement has been grasped from my life experiences along with my experiences within the moreau first year experience class. starting with weeks one, two, and three, i took some time to practice some self-reflection while also looking to see the people who inspire me in order to determine what exactly i wanted to be remembered for. i looked at all my regrets, failures, and weaknesses along with my proud moments, successes, and strengths. taking time for self-reflection is scary, but it is something that i wish to further integrate in my life for the next few years through meditation and visualization. i am scared of leaving the world behind, but i must be willing to examine myself and my worst mistakes to be able to learn something about the person i want to become before i die. sister aletheia explores this topic when she talks about how running away from death is futile. in order for me to find true satisfaction with myself, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). facing the hard reality of death helps me to figure out the true life that i want to leave behind. i have also discovered that especially in college, constantly chasing different purposes and people in life can be incredibly difficult. that is why i thought it was incredibly poignant when author pico iyer said that “the more we contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i want to stay in touch with my inner self while still not sacrificing connections with others. in order to find the balance for this, i took a long hard look at people like fr. hesburgh, as examples of people who did live a good life, some that we might all aspire to. i think often of the https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ mojica 3 legacy that fr. hesburgh left behind, especially when he spoke about how “differences of culture, religion, and conviction can coexist with friendship, and civility, and even love” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). even when differences divide us, it is our duty to reach across the line that separates us with an open mind and open heart. i hope to do this within the next few years by purposefully reaching out to friends that i have let drift away, and even those people who i do not always get along with, as i believe that peace and kindness is always the right answer. i wish to learn from the example of fr. herburgh, as it is not enough for me to grow in my own life well-lived: i wish to push others to do the same. in order for me to figure out my future, i need to first examine the parts of myself that i am already proud of, the people i admire, and the legacy that i will leave behind when i die one day. moving onto weeks four, five and six, i began to think more about my future, and although i am nervous to see what the future holds for me, i am optimistic that i can shape my future, despite any obstacles that stand in my way. taking charge of my future is a challenge, but it is one that i wish to take on with force. i have looked into the moreau website about “navigating your career journey”, and am reassured when it says that “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). playing an active role in the discovery of my future career offers me a bit of peace about the future. i will be reaching out to resources like the moreau center in the next three years in order to have a firm grasp on what my future will hold. in addition to understanding the first steps to seeking out a career, my discernment activity where i talked to my mom, was a definite confidence booster, as she encouraged me to https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ mojica 4 seek out a career in which i can help people (“week 5 reflection discerning a life well-lived” by moreau fye week five). talking to people like my mom does a lot to help me center myself, and i wish to continue this practice both as a talker and listener in my next few years at notre dame. i know that i will face obstacles in trying to achieve my goals in my career and otherwise, but i do not want to shy away from these moments of suffering. as dr. jihoon kim, the founder of a nonprofit organization jd kim ministries, expresses, “suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering” (“five minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). i admire the strength of dr. kim, and i am able to better understand from his example that i will not be able to go through my life without suffering, but i must be able to adapt and adjust to any troublesome situations that might arise. i think that the themes of the first six weeks are well complemented by the topics that we broached in weeks seven, nine, and ten. when i think about connecting with those around me, i realize that i need to make this more of a priority in my life, as i often form opinions about other people before i even know them. this is why father greg boyle’s comments within tattoos on the heart stood out to me, as he said that “it always becomes impossible to demonize someone you know” (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven). like fr. greg talks about, i must take on the task of including all people into my own jurisdiction, as he did with the gang members of the neighborhoods. throughout my time here at notre dame, it has been difficult for me to push myself out of my comfort zone to make new friends. i have to remember that a life well-lived is one in which i am constantly making a positive impact on the people around me, and in order to do that, i must ditch any preconceived opinions. reaching out to new people is hard, but i hope to be a face of https://docs.google.com/document/d/18sjmrgtid2pl5lpt3h839ukpjq8sfeapenpe-cvtl3i/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/18sjmrgtid2pl5lpt3h839ukpjq8sfeapenpe-cvtl3i/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008/download?download_frd=1 mojica 5 welcoming and kindness in the coming years, especially for incoming freshmen. even just a smile or wave in the halls can make a big difference. any relationships that i form must also not be one sided, as i especially liked the quote from fr. gustavo guitiérrez, a scholar known to many as the “father of liberation theology, when he said that friendship “is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i must be able to positively impact others just as much as they are able to uplift me. in order for relationships to be healthy, they must go both ways. i cannot allow myself to be used and tossed aside i must stand up for myself in any relationship i encounter in my next three years. when i am fostering any new relationships, i must remember to be kind and understanding to all those who are different from me. like it says in the article about “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame”, we all have a responsibility to “welcome others who bring additional gifts, talents, and backgrounds to the community” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life moreau fye week ten). inclusion must be a vital part of my own mission statement, both on campus and in all parts of my life, as i want every person to feel comfortable with talking to me about any issue in their life. inclusive practices can range from a compliment in the elevator to an invitation to lunch. it does not have to be anything huge, but sticking my neck out for people that need some extra love could be an incredibly beneficial practice to implement in my life for the coming years. for weeks eleven, twelve, and thirteen, i have come to realize that educating myself and putting myself out there to find my purpose is vital for my mission to live a life well-lived. especially in the face of racial injustice in the current political climate, i realize that i must take https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ mojica 6 on the responsibility of educating myself on all matters, even if they do not concern me directly. i also have a responsibility to surround myself with contrasting views and uncomfortable conversations so that i might grow in my knowledge of the world. echo chambers are easy to get stuck in, which is why i must “be intentional about the information that [i] expose [myself] to by seeking out intelligent people with whom [i] disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). dr. blaschko makes a good point here, as challenging perspectives is an important way to expand my horizons. i must find ways to reach out to people in the next few years who might differ from me politically or otherwise, so that i might be able to broaden my own perspective. in addition to seeking out conflicting perspectives, every single time i hear of a discriminatory injustice or see another news story about an abuse on minorities, i am reminded of my responsibility to be an active bystander and outspoken critic in times of need. i am in a position of privilege, both as a white person and as a student at a prestigious university, and it is true what dean g. marcus cole says: my education and position “do place me in a position to do something about [racial violence]” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). i must seek out uncomfortable conversations, even when it is difficult. social justice issues are an issue that i cannot push aside, and i am dedicated to the fight against them, especially in my time at notre dame. in conclusion, in looking at all these different areas of who i was, who am now, and who i want to be in the future, i am able to cohesively combine all of these ideas into a mission statement that i developed during my thirteenth week with moreau. i am proud of the work that i https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ mojica 7 have put into this class, and i hope to accomplish much more self-discovery even after this year is over. i want to take control of my future, whether it is in the area of career, family, friendship, or anything else. i want to be proud of the legacy i leave behind, and i want it to be one that reflects the beauty and truth of life. ultimately, i want that legacy to be a legacy of love. moreau fye experience integration 3 3/4/2022 my eulogy it is with great sadness for me today that it is time to write my eulogy, but i shall not forget to mention how fortunate i am that elon musk created the real-life version of the sorcerer’s stone which allows me to deliver my own eulogy despite my dead body. seeing all of you here at my funeral today is a true gift to me because i know you are all very busy doing important things and i feel blessed to be bestowed with your care. because this is my eulogy, i must treat it as such by highlighting why i mattered while inhabiting the earth as well as the legacy i left. i am, or was, an honest man, and will do my best to balance being honest about my life with the eulogy’s importance in displaying the special, life-giving qualities of the deceased, something which everyone of you possess in your own way. a eulogy also lets us do introspection the correct way. we ask “what” questions rather than the more damaging “why” questions. “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect,” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). death is a weird concept, but in understanding death we receive life. as sister theresa aletheia noble practiced, is is important to “intentionally think about your own death every day as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future,” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die,” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). in my time on earth, i worked hard. i could say i worked hard for the people around me, and some may say i worked hard for my own gain, but the truth is i worked hard because my nature governed me to. i constantly was testing myself for my own capability, and always looked ahead for new challenges to tackle. this is easily seen in my professional career, but it was most important in my personal, family life. i put faith in myself when dealing with relationships. having fallen in love right before leaving for college, i knew a long distance relationship would be a challenge, but i had faith that i could handle the work required to keep the relationship strong. i knew that hard work pays off, and that love is always worth it. i knew that having kids would the biggest challenge of my life but i trusted that my wife and i had the capacity to do the work of being a parent. i was blessed by my beautiful children and though i wasn’t perfect, i worked very hard as a parent to raise my kids and i was a great, loving dad. i was blessed with fantastic people in my life but my loyalty to others was essential in finding them. much of this came from my honesty. i couldn’t lie to the people around me and developed a habit of using out-right honesty from a very young age that was refreshing to people (i learned this in my moreau fye week five discussion when talking to my friend cj about who i am). my “boys” from high school were my boys for life, and i never let go of the life-giving bond that those special men and i held. they were always there to lend me a hand, and i always was there for them. in conversations, we held nothing back. much of what created our bond was the way we held each other accountable, something which required the utmost honesty. as a husband, i developed strong trust with my wife and never felt the need to hold back anything from her. i was loyal to her. i was a loyal father, too. as my children grew up and faced the challenges we all face, i was always in their corner pulling for them. attending the university of notre dame, i was greatly inspired by father ted hesburgh. his courage was incredible and i always did my best to emulate him. when asked to join martin luther king in chicago, “he wasn’t worried about the controversy. his only response was, ‘when do you want me there,” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week two). i like to think i was a simple man. no amount of material goods were as important to me as the relationships i made in life or the priority of experiencing life as it allowed me to. experience it life to me was about getting off my phone, engaging with those around me, making plans when i didn’t have to, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters – just get out and experience life,” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). going to college for me wasn’t about finding the most rewarding career pay-wise, but my path to serving the world which gifted me with life. i never tried to dramatically live above my means, but also felt no need to. living simplistically allowed me to, as pico iyer wrote, “get away from our less considered habits,” and live more mindfully (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). i was a natural leader. from a young age, i made a rule for myself to never ask more from subordinates than i would be willing to do myself which i held myself accountable to. it is a matter of solidarity, which as pope francis said, “is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis -moreau fye week seven). understanding this rule meant that i must either let my projects fail, or work extremely hard, and i typically chose the latter. in my career, i didn’t always perform to my potential, but i inspired people who worked for me through my dedication to tasks in front of me. again, here is something which is more important in my personal life despite being obvious in my career. i made sure that i was willing to at least match the work which my friends, parents, siblings, and children did to help me out. integration three mojica 1 professor lassen moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 living life loudly it is hard to know where to start, when talking about the legacy that katherine left behind. we all know and remember how clearly every emotion was written on her face, how she would run away from cringey movie scenes, and how she would throw herself on the ground just to give her dogs an extra pet or two. that was the kind of person she was. always pushing herself to be better, to do better, to feel better. she cared a lot, about the world around her, about her family, her friends, her dogs. but what inspired the person she became? and what advice can we all look to, to learn how to become like the person that katherine was? in looking at katherine’s life, i immediately thought about her priorities and the way that she lived everyday. she was a fiercely independent individual, never afraid to raise her hand first or to be the one to talk on the phone for the pizza delivery (that is, if no one else wanted to do it). in fact, she was a person who could be entirely happy in her own little world, although she only occasionally wanted to be. she loved spending time with her family and friends, talking and laughing until she felt full inside. she loved people, and loved being with people, but if it ever became too much, she was never afraid to talk on and on about her “social battery” and how she needed to go recharge for a while. in the words of pico iyer, “the more we contact others, the more, it seems, we lose contact with ourselves” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). katherine preached self-care all of the time, and i think that is something that we can learn from her life. she knew her limits, and she was not afraid to https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ mojica 2 stand up for herself and for her needs. in all of our lives, it is always important to take time for ourselves. as much as we want to care about others, we can only do so much if we are not taking care of ourselves. so during this week, this month, this year, this life: take a minute of deep breaths or even just a couple of seconds to close your eyes and think about exactly how you are feeling in that moment. for just a little while, put yourself and your own needs and feelings first. see how it feels. reaffirm yourself and your place in the world, and then go on with your day, your night, your life. you might feel a bit better if you do. katherine was also someone who was passionate about all sorts of things, be it social justice, socioeconomic opportunities for everyone, environmental protection, political involvement, peace in our world, etc. she contained a whole lot of empathy for everyone and everything she came across, and she struggled with figuring out where to channel her intense emotions about the world’s problems. she took it all on her own back, shouldering the weight of the world. even in college when she was still trying to figure out what to do, her mom said that they had a conversation for a discernment conversation activity in which they talked about how what katherine really wanted to do was help people (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). she believed that bringing people together was of utmost importance. differences between us do not outweigh the love that can bring people together. in the words of father hesburgh, “differences of culture, religion, and conviction can coexist with friendship, civility, and even love” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). until the very end, katherine remained optimistic that we would all be able to come together, even if it took a lifetime. she hated how polarized the world became and she worked hard to at least try and empathize with every person she came across. just as father greg boyle talks about in tattoos on the heart, “it always becomes impossible to demonize someone https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 mojica 3 you know” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). so, katherine worked to get to know as many people as she could (at least the ones who were not scared off by her resting face). she tried her very hardest to care for as many people as she could. so the next time you hate someone deeply, so passionately that it makes you want to scream, i ask you to give them a second chance. walk in their shoes for a bit. do it for katherine, and do it for the empathetic world that she dreamed of seeing. while katherine caused a lot of smiles in this world, she also faced a lot of hardships too, and struggled especially with mental health throughout her life. she fought through them, and was able to find contentment and joy even during those difficult times. she especially turned to friends and family, people she loved and trusted to help her surge onward. like dr. jd kim, she knew that “suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but [life] is really about how to respond to suffering” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). katherine responded to suffering with vengeance. she hated those lows, but she knew that having them made the highs that much sweeter. it was hard, but she learned from people like sister aletheia, that in life, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). life is hard, tricky, messy. but in order to find true joy and light, we must forge on through the darkness to get there. so when you are at your lowest, just trying to make it through until tomorrow, i want to tell you to remember that the light will come. the sun will always come up. i promise. it will come. so while it is sad to say our final goodbyes to katherine, i want to leave you all with a few last thoughts about katherine. she was a determined, strong, powerful individual who took the world by storm. so, just like the “navigating your career journey” page says, “get out and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/files/524008/download?download_frd=1 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html mojica 4 experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). katherine would have wanted you all to be a force for good in the world, but most importantly, to be truly alive in this world. to feel every feeling and experience every experience. life is meant to be lived loudly. remember that. so go be the person you were meant to be, the person that katherine believed you could be. you can do it. and never back down, no matter what the world says. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ integration integration 3 i just found out that i am officially going to honduras in may and i couldn’t be happier. for some context, my dad is honduran and ever since i was little my family and i would visit since most of my dad’s family still lives there. as i got older, the poverty in honduras became more apparent to me and i wanted to do something. my aunt is a director for an organization that provides safety, housing, education, etc to children at risk (i don’t really like to call it an orphanage) in honduras so i asked her if i could help out. the first time i volunteered was in the summer going into high school and it sounds cliche but it completely changed my life in that what i want to do in the future is centered around what i do in honduras. after doing the many moreau assignments that allowed me to think about what i am passionate about and how that should shape my career, i know that that is what i want to do. “look for the task that will continue to stretch you. that’s all important in discerning that really vital vocation in one’s life” and for me that task is my work and time in honduras (“three key questions by father michael himes moreau fye week three). if i hadn’t made the decision to do what i did, i don’t know if i would have any idea of what direction i wanted to take in life. this is why it’s important “to test the waters just get out and experience life” in order to get to know yourself (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau week four). throughout the years, i have created these beautiful friendships with both the children and the people who run the community. when i wasn’t working on projects, like repainting the houses, i was playing soccer in the fields with the older boys or just talking with the girls my age while we braided each other's hair. even though they aren’t technically allowed to have phones, many of the older kids do, so i still keep in touch with them via facebook or instagram. i also https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ created this special bond with the lady in charge of the community, mae, who is seen as the “tia” or aunt of all the kids. because the community for the children is in the countryside, it is pretty isolated. i stayed with mae during my first time there and i learned a lot from her. she is this strong amazing woman who dedicates all of her time and love to these children. she is the type of person that you know is special right when you meet her. mae sort of became my second grandmother. because mae never had any kids, she was never a grandmother and i remember one day she said i was like a granddaughter to her and i will never forget it. when we watched the documentary on father hesburgh as an inspiration for a life well lived, it made me think of people that i know that i could look up to as role models for a life well-lived and i thought of mae ("hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). i truly believe that my relationship with mae has allowed me to live a better life. i would not be the same without meeting her and hearing her story. these are the relationships that characterize a life well lived (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). because of covid, it has been almost two years and a half years since i’ve been able to go to honduras; i used to go at least once a year for a month or so. i feel like i am my truest and happiest self when i am there. i am not the only one who notices that either. when i asked my best friend about when she has seen me at my very best, she responded with when she saw me in honduras (moreau week 5). i think a part of why i feel like myself there is because i am not caught up in the chaos of everything going on around me. when i am there, i am fully present and since there is no service anyways, i am never on my phone. this goes back to the idea that the article from week 1 discusses “why we need to slow down our lives” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ the people in the community in honduras have taught me more about life than any class i have ever taken. similar to the man in the video from week 6 who was paralyzed, these children have faced so much adversity yet they are still grateful for what they have and make the best of the situation they are in (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week six). i believe that nuevo paraiso (the name of the community for displaced children) has allowed me to develop into the person i am today and i hope to continue to help nuevo paraiso and the children develop as they have helped me. whenever people ask me what my dream job is, the first thing that comes to mind is working at nuevo paraiso. i would not only be able to spend all my time with the children but also improve the community as a whole. i constantly think about how this could happen. getting to the root of the problem would be to get rid of poverty as a whole which would mean to get rid of capitalism which is not happening anytime soon. that’s why, although it may be a band aid solution, these communities for displaced children are necessary. anyways, i am beyond grateful for my experiences at nuevo paraiso and the thought that i will be back in just a couple months brings tears of joy to my eyes. moreau, clancy: integration 3 clancy professor chan moreau first year seminar 4 march 2022 connection, service, and faith madison lived a faced paced life but she was not one to shy from contemplation. she recognized that “... the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). throughout her education, she questioned her purpose. especially during her time at the university of notre dame, she felt that she was called to be more. through various social concerns seminars, madison discovered a passion for interacting and being in communication with others. like father hesburgh who could find common ground with anyone, especially when he “found one thing running through [their] conversations, that they all liked to fish” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two), madison aimed to make true connections with all she encountered, and her kind demeanor lead her to commonly succeed in this endeavor, especially in the realm of service. she recognized that she “ “allowing folks into my [her] jurisdiction requires me [her] to dismantle what i [she] have set up to keep them out” (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8 jurisdiction” by father greg boyle moreau fye week 7). however, madison's life was not all highs. “is this a source of joy?” (“three key questions” [adapted] by father michael himes moreau fye week three) was a question she pondered frequently as she struggled with overthinking things. it took her a long time to learn to be confident in herself. when asked the question “what are you good at?” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four), she struggled. she felt that she spent so much of her time on things she was not good at. she loved to dance (which she was not very good at) and she enjoyed running (which she was also not good at), she also wasn’t necessarily thriving in her business classes as she hoped. but, after receiving advice from her professor, as well as engaging in a pasquerilla west hall faith group, madison realized that, first off, it is https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/524007?module_item_id=168044 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202?module_item_id=145988 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ clancy okay to do things you are not good at, especially hobbies. her faith group in particular revealed that it actually shows perseverance, a very helpful trait to possess. in regards to business classes, madison remained patient and soon discovered the realm of social impact and sustainability work in business where she discovered the intersection between her passion and the classes she was taking. to continue, those around madison, specifically her mother, recognized madison’s desire to help others, and made an effort to remind her that “you can’t always make everyone happy and can’t do everything for other people.” (“reflection on the conversation with my mother” by moreau fye week five). while this was not always easy to hear, madison took it and decided that instead of focusing on all the people that she would not be able to help in the world, she focused on the people she could. she brought this mentality into her daily life, continuing to checking in on those around her, while also being vulnerable with those she talked with. while it took time, madison grew to be a wonderful listener, and someone that had an ability to understand others. this journey of self-growth was a long one. madison recognized that, “introspection can cloud and confuse our self-perceptions, unleashing a host of unintended consequences” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six), and consequently she had to be thoughtful about asking herself the right questions, specifically the “what” of it all. in order to do this, she found it helpful to engage in prayer. madison became an active member of her chapel at the university of notre dame, attending weekly evening prayer, serving as a lector and sacristan, as well as commonly attending the rosary. she took these practices into life after college and integrated them into all she did in her life. some of madison’s closest friends explain a story she told them about one rosary in particular. she mentioned how, all her life, she struggled finding focus. her mind would commonly wander and she would feel bad about it. she would feel like she was a bad catholic (something she struggled with commonly in her youth). however, during this particular rosary, during the lenten https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gi9_cyzgdwq9u1fwm_uizml7y_teycnptm_o44vpzsq/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ clancy season, she realized that it is not about perfection. she came to a sense of kindness toward herself, acknowledging that she truly is loved by the lord no matter what. she remembered the feeling of truly having faith that the lord’s understanding is beyond her ability to comprehend as a person, and how special that was. she credits part of this experience to her foundations of theological class where she was able to take an analytical approach to faith: one she appreciated. after continuing on this journey of careful questioning and faith, madison encouraged others to do the same throughout life. as mentioned, she was involved with her parish all through adulthood, where she shared her experience with others. she also did lots of work with youth groups (both religious and not) to share her lessons on appreciating yourself and your humanness, and finding a new perspective. in the workplace, where madison worked for the sustainability and social impact committees for various companies over her lifetime, she led mindful meetings frequently to continue her goal of helping those around her. lastly, while connection, service, and prayer were large parts of who madison was, this would not be a complete dedication without acknowledging the love madison had for her family. her sister, shannon, truly was her role model and she consulted her on every single aspect of life. her brother, gavin and her parents were her rock over the years and she was thankful for them in every way. she commonly thanked her friends, especially those she made at the university of notre dame, as could not put into words the love she had for them. lastly, her dog, sievert. sievert served as a kind, wonderful companion over madison’s life, and he provided dear comfort, even in her hardest days. madison was a thoughtful, faithful, and loving person, who dedicated her life to sharing it with others. microsoft word document5 sanghyun’s eulogy: life of a well-lived man as an old friend of , i have observed his whole life. i saw what he saw, i felt what he felt, and i thought what he thought. now i want to reflect my friend, sanghyun, through going over every incident we experienced together. through this eulogy, i want to let you know what kind of person sanghyun was, and what kind of life he lived. when sanghyun went into college, university of notre dame, we often called each other and had some deep conversation. one time, he asked me about “what should we define a well-lived life?” i was stunned. i never have thought about such question in my life. so, i asked him to talk about his definition first. sanghyun’s answer was simple: we can call a life is welllived when someone lived a life full of happiness. then, i asked another question. what is happiness? his reply included a quote from fr. michael hime’s article “three key questions.” fr. michael himes said, “the most important thing you can do in your life is to come to a point where you can say that, “this is a genuine me!”” he told me according to aristotle, happiness not only comes from pleasure of real life, but is something more than that. happiness is an outcome when one accomplishes his goal of life virtually. the three questions fr. michael himes conveys in his article is “what gives you joy?”, “what are you really good at?”, and “what do the people around you really need?”. answering these questions, sanghyun told me that well-lived life comes from doing what you enjoy and good at and making good relationships. he added that since we are living in a digital age, we need to be more cautious. pico iyer says, “i have encountered has been that the people who seem wisest about the necessity of placing limits on the newest technologies, which have bulldozed over so many of the limits of old.” this shows that to live a well-lived life, we need to be more careful about using digital devices. while i was writing the eulogy, i remembered the moments with sanghyun and i tried to figure out whether he lived a well-lived life. one thing i am sure about is that sanghyun had faith. he had a faith beyond his life, which was his power source. faith led him to live a life as a senior consultant, faith led him to make a family, and faith led him to serve for the others during his entire life. as rev. john jenkins said in the hesburgh film, “ted was a bridge-builder between people and god and among people” when he was commenting about fr. hesburgh’s life, i am sure sanghyun was also a bridge-builder. sanghyun through his donation program and volunteer activity, became a figure of love within his community. he went to every and anywhere that needed his help. i saw the passion in sanghyun and was always curious about the source of such passion. one day, i was talking with him in the flight going to his home country, south korea, i found out that the origin of the passion is his faith. sanghyun said, “when i confront a problem, i always think i am the only one that can solve this problem. i believe that i can handle the problem. and this gives me power to actually go through the struggle and finally accomplish my goal.” i remember the moment when sanghyun told me about the successful journey of life. he said he always have been asking himself whether his life is successful or not. at the end, he ceased to ask himself such question. he found out the answer is there is no such journey. success is a subjective concept, and everyone have different definition of success. navigating your career journey –meruelo family center for career development states that, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters – just get our and experience life.” sanghyun told me life is a journey to find yourself. there is no answer in our life and our career. therefore, we should be open-minded and find our own career. everything we do is a part of our life experience, and there is no experience that is worthless. sanghyun was the most genuine person i ever met. i remember the conversation that i had with him during the freshman year in university of notre dame. he told me that he had to ask few questions that reflects him. i remember the moment that i was completely honest in front of him. i told him he was the most genuine, and passionate person i have ever seen. i told sanghyun that his goal might be helping the community, no matter what kind of job he has. my prediction was correct. sanghyun served for the agricultural community in his country, and he helped the education of the teenagers in the korean rural area. sanghyun used to meditate a lot, reflecting himself. one day, i ran into his room and accidently disrupted his meditation. he was smiling at me and recommended to join meditation. he told me about a quote by tasha eurich. she said “if you ask why, [i think] you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality…” giving this quote, sanghyun advised me to continue the meditation by asking what kind a person am i, not why i became such person. now, meditation became part of myself. i not only ask myself what kind of person i am, but i also ask what kind of person sanghyun was. my conclusion is that he was a genuine and kind person. before i end this eulogy, i want to tell everyone to have a genuine relationship life me and sanghyun. making such relationship is not easy. human is a social animal, and we cannot live without making relationship. then we can realize that to live a well-lived life, it is important to live a genuine relationship. according to pope francis, “we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” then how can we make a genuine connection with others? sanghyun have told me the answer. genuine relationship is a relationship containing freedom of speech, and we can make them only through open-minded mindset. i wish you all can make such relationship with the people around you. “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau week one “hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau week two “three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau week three “navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau week four “week five irishcompass activity” – moreau week five “the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – moreau week six “why the only future worth. building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau week seven capstone integration capstone integration professor harrington 4/22/22 failure, reflecting on failure, and reshaping failure in my mind, failure exists in three distinct stages. first, there is the actual failure; it may be a poor grade on a test, a lost friend, or maybe even just bad weather. next is the stage in which we reflect on that failure. some people believe failure is defeated by simply moving on, ignoring any of the negative emotions associated with it. but, being “sad” about negative things is a normal human response, so there's no need to combat failures with toxic, relentless positivity. once we have finished reflecting on our failures, the third and final stage towards newfound freedom is our personal response. this is to reshape our future, and turn failures into new opportunities. overall, the management of these three stages happens to be my personal mission statement: during the rest of my life i will experience failure, i will reflect on such failures, and i will respond to such failures (personal mission statement moreau fye week 13). as the common adage goes, the first step to solving a problem is acknowledging the problem. this idea holds true for failure, as one must acknowledge failure before conquering it. one of the best ways to observe all of the obstacles in your life is through meditation. for me, i have found sunday to be the perfect day of meditation. in moreau week 1, pico iyer’s article states, “this is what the principle of the sabbath enshrines … the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). on sunday i often meditate on both my religious and personal struggles, which happen to overlap in many cases. this day of meditation allows me to become aware of all the so-called “failures” of my week. this acknowledgment of all my struggles allows for healthy venting. furthermore, the recognition of failure is essential to the career journey emphasized throughout moreau. a notre dame ccd article states that, “much as we present [the career journey] with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family ccd moreau fye week 4). i have made some goals for my career, but this article helped me dismantle some of the strict, and otherwise ruthless, guidelines i have set out for myself. career development is a non-linear process, filled with failure, which provided me with some newfound comfort. acknowledging future failures within your career journey is essential to a successful career, and many business moguls will reiterate this. as illustrated, it is beneficial to admit failures, but oftentimes it can be difficult to do this on your own. sometimes asking your closest friends for advice can highlight the struggles currently plaguing your life. during week 5 of moreau, i had an excellent conversation with my friend shane, in which he highlighted that i often am too ambitious and serious with my school work, causing a lot of stress (conversation with shane moreau fye week 5). thus, having friends help analyze certain struggles in your life can be beneficial. the next stage of dealing with failure is crafting a personal response. personally, i believe the best way to form a response is through meditation. although meditation can be useful in acknowledging struggles (as mentioned above), it simultaneously helps me forge the strength to combat my problems. but, there is a very certain manner to creating a response during introspection. dr. eurich’s article argues that, in reflection, “asking why can sometimes cause our brains to mislead us … because of something called the “recency effect,” … your brain may misdirect you to the first available explanation” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). sometimes during reflection, we turn to the first available explanation, however far-fetched, to somehow justify our problems. for instance, if someone receives a poor grade on a test, they may justify that the test was very challenging. but, this may be ignoring the fact that they didn’t study enough, or maybe even a larger issue of a social-school life balance. thus, during personal reflection, we need to dig deep to uncover the truth behind our feelings, and from there craft an appropriate plan of action. although a plan of action must be formed for every issue, i have discovered something that is indispensable to following through with the plan of action. this solution, however cliché, is relationships. in moreau week 7, we read an article from pope francis, in which he states, “many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve … happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). as pope francis describes, happiness requires a harmony between all our different components, our friends, within our lives. so, in order to truly overcome all our obstacles, we must rely on our network of relationships. all in all, a goal without a plan is just a wish. by actively responding to all the failures in our life, we are able to live life to the fullest, and become the truest version of ourselves. much of my eulogy in integration 3 relied on this concept of discovering myself. by coming to terms with my own identity, values, and failures, i have become better prepared for the future (“integration 3” moreau fye week 8). while responding to failure is often viewed as an individual issue, it undoubtedly needs to be applied to our collective society. dean marcus cole has a similar view on acknowledging https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/serial_position_effect#recency_effect failures as i do. in his article, he declares that, “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states. this reality must be acknowledged, and addressed. (dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.' by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). but, once we have actually recognized the severity of racism and other social issues in america, we must act on them. in his hidden brain podcast, eitan hersh notes the necessity of acting on our emotions. he describes the difference between political hobbyism and real politics: “it's whether the emotion is the end in itself or a means to an end. so in short-cut politics, in hobbyism, emotion is the goal…but in real politics, anger, righteous anger and emotion, are something you leverage into action” (“passion isn’t enough” by eitan hersh moreau fye week 11). you cannot treat politics the same as you do sports. in politics, emotions must be channeled into real action, which again aligns with my idea of channeling failure into an opportunity. on another note, one of the biggest problems preventing social progress is our polarized political parties. yet, everytime i think about america’s political divide, i remember the words of father hesburgh. in week 2, we watched a documentary on fr. hesburgh, in which he avidly stated, “in the wake of vatican ii, catholic universities faced a critical question: was it possible to be both a great university and catholic? i believed it was. as long as there was balance… i was entirely devoted to the church, but i wouldn’t let it stand in the way of education” (“hesburgh'' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh was a man of unmatchable balance. he balanced republicans and democrats, blacks and whites, catholics and non-catholics. due to his position as a university president and catholic priest, father hesburgh once again had to find the balance between these opposing forces. i believe it is this mindset of balance that we should approach the political divide in our country. now that this has all been said, what physical steps can i take to reverse societal failures, such as racism? one way i can help fight racism is by talking about race in an open manner. dr. diangelo discusses how to fight “white fragility” in his article, saying, “socialized into a deeply internalized sense of superiority and entitlement that we are either not consciously aware of or can never admit to ourselves, we become highly fragile in conversations about race” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). being a white person, i have worked to dismantle whatever veil of white fragility looms over me, by simply being very open to conversations about racism. as a member of the greater notre dame community, it is important that i support my friends and fellow classmates that suffer from the hatred directed towards marginalized groups. but, as best stated in the words of fr. gustavo gutiérrez, “solidarity … means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless… this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). in allyship, we should always stand “next to” or “behind” our friends in support. we should never stand “in front”. with this in mind, i hope to become a better ally of marginalized communities, as we traverse the social and political failures that plague our nation. as i navigate the rest of my life, my mission statement is to acknowledge personal and societal failures and then respond to such failures. all in all, life is short. in week 3, moreau, we read about sister alethei, the nun obsessed with death. one friend of sister alethei says that, “she’s so young and vibrant and joyful and is also reminding us all we’re going to die” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). sister alethei reminds me that someday, i will die, and thus it is silly at times to moor over the imminent failures of life. we only have a finite time on earth, so we must accept both the failures and achievements that will come. works cited week 1 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week 3 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week 4 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/ edit week 6: https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript week 8 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1modug_2vl1ebgt-tikb0xj-pzaaloxojqelqxxddxyc/e dit week 9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1modug_2vl1ebgt-tikb0xj-pzaaloxojqelqxxddxyc/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1modug_2vl1ebgt-tikb0xj-pzaaloxojqelqxxddxyc/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/e dit week 10 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/ edit week 11 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ week 12: https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breath e-and-i-can-do-something/ week 13: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bqjgxkwobe0n6zqa96t61vgrn_h7b4sjxwnbmttr 1qs/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bqjgxkwobe0n6zqa96t61vgrn_h7b4sjxwnbmttr1qs/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bqjgxkwobe0n6zqa96t61vgrn_h7b4sjxwnbmttr1qs/edit integration 3 what drives a leader? when it comes to reflective leadership, i think i’ve always had a warped way of thinking of what that means. prior to some of the conversations and readings we’ve done in moreau, i thought leadership was contingent upon being the loudest in the room, the most demanding, and the most respected. basically, i thought in order to lead i thought you had to take the role by force. while, it is true that in order to be a good leader, you must be strong enough to hold your convictions with value and act on them as deresiewicz says, but i’ve learned that there is a more sensitive side to being a leader. i’ll be the first to say that i would consider myself a leader, or at least someone who enjoys being in leadership roles. however, when asked what my convictions were or what i held in high value in my life, i blanked. i knew i wanted to lead but had no idea what i wanted to do with that responsibility. this was a scary realization to come to. something that really stuck out to me when coming to this realization was a classmate's quote read anonymously a couple of weeks ago. it was some variation of the statement, “of all people i know, i know myself the least.” this was so touching to me, and i didn’t even know what classmate of mine had encapsulated my thoughts so perfectly. upon reflection of this opening quote i realized my classmate couldn’t be more right. i don’t know my values and what is important to me, right off the top of my head, if i’m being completely honest with myself. this set off a deeper journey within myself that forced me to get to know myself better. i was at a loss at first for how to do this at first and tried a number of things. however, something really stuck with me after the solitude module in week 7. deresiwicz says, “your own reality--for yourself, not for others." thinking for yourself means finding yourself, finding your own reality. here's the other problem with facebook and twitter and even the new york times. when you expose yourself to those things, especially in the constant way that people do now--older people as well as younger people--you are continuously bombarding yourself with a stream of other people's thoughts.” (solitude and leadership: if you want others to follow, learn to be alone with your thoughts. by william deresiewicz) i’ve since been spending more time alone and being more reflective. this alone time has allowed me to realize what is important to me and realize that being alone is something i’m uncomfortable with and will have to get better at. also, weirdly enough, observing leaders around me. i’ve studied how sure of themselves they are and how they know what they want and what is important to them. i’ve realized that a constant is they know what drives them to lead, and i’ve since been searching for that in myself. in response to my own question, what drives a leader, i’ve realized in order to answer this i must understand what used to make me want to lead versus what makes me want to now. i’ve realized that before, my only drive to be a leader was for the title and the accomplishment of doing it. while we’ve all heard the time honored phrase of, “ don’t live for the resume,” i think that is much easier said than done considering ‘living’ for my resume is what likely made it possible for me to apply and be accepted into institutions like notre dame. however, i’ve since realized that this is not a sustainable or fulfilling way to live. while it’s true that being a leader just for the sake of being a leader is at its surface an accomplishment, i never knew what i wanted to do with that responsibility. a quote from week 1 that feels really relevant to this is, “ most of us do not know how and that it is precisely how we arrived at yale, by having a passion for success.” ( the students william derrisiwicz week 1) this was a yale student’s response to being told to ‘find your passion’. while i do not go to yale, i can directly relate. for instance, my senior year of highschool, i ran and was elected to be senior class president. this was a large credential on my resume, and yet i cannot think of something i lead outside of planning prom. this is a small scale example of not knowing your passions as a leader, but i think it applies. i had no love for what i was doing and therefore could not be successful in my endeavors. this specifically reminds me of the ted talk by pope francis where he says,” in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity. and i know that ted gathers many creative minds.yes, love does require a creative, concrete and ingenious attitude.” ( why the only future worth building includes everyonehis holiness pope francisweek 5) how could i ever expect to be an effective leader when i didn’t love what i was doing and never took the time to figure out why or how to change it? while i’ve talked about my realization that i have little to no convictions in my everyday life, much less when i lead, i’d like to move to what i have recently realized i am passionate about. after watching the hesburgh movie, i realized that father ted embodied a lot of what i could only hope to be one day. his seamless connections with others, overwhelming humility and kindness, and simultaneous professionalism and sensitivity in his work are just some of the things that stuck out to me that i admire about him. a particular quote that stuck out to me was one that said, “ father hesburgh had an extraordinary ability to reach across lives.” ( hesburgh movieweek 2) wow. just that simple statement in itself says so much about him. i’ll be honest in saying that i didn’t know much about father hesburgh prior to having to watch this movie, and i was shocked by how newly inspired i felt after watching it. after watching the movie, i was given some clarity on what my own passions are. i’ve never really been able to put a specific name or pin on this certain desire within myself to find the sensitivity or dignity in helping people all around the country or world. i thought that it was just some desire i had to do service work, but couldn’t really shake the feeling that maybe it was something more. after watching father ted lead such a versatile work where he helped people in ways ranging from being active in the civil rights movement to being there for the students of notre dame, i realized that helping and impacting people in different ways is most definitely what i am passionate about. i’ve recently added a double major to my american studies as a global studies major. i want to focus on international affairs and specifically on integral human development. i think it’s important to have a global lens to the problems around the world, but not at the expense of human life, dignity, or morale. to revisit the question of: what drives a leader? i’ll be honest. i’m not completely positive. i think i’ll be figuring it out for a long time. however, i am happy to say that i am doing things now that i am passionate about and will continue to ask myself that question until i am completely certain of my convictions. inegration three bryan reaume moreau first year experience 25 february 2022 in loving memory of preface: i find the idea of writing my own eulogy a little awkward and egotistical, but it must be done! i’m going off the perspective that this would be read at my funeral and addressed to my loved ones. “all of my other vocations, all of the many ways in which i live my life, must contribute to that one all embracing demand, that one constant vocation to be fully, totally, absolutely as human as i can possibly be” ("three key questions" by fr. himes moreau fye week three). this is a piece of knowledge that has become more prominent in this time of mourning of our loved one. life, and humanity, is something that is more fragile than we tend to think, and unfortunately, only becomes more prominent in times of loss. was someone who always strove to be as human as she could be, striving to connect and impact others, which has been proven successful as i look around at the many faces that are here to celebrate her today. while it is painful, it is important to focus on what she has done versus the empty space she will leave behind. corinne grew up in portland her whole life, where she was able to be surrounded by something that brought her true peace: access to natural beauty and the outdoors. i had the privilege of being able to share time hiking, camping, and backpacking with her, and i can say from personal experience that i have never seen her more at home than when she was surrounded by pine trees, laughing by the campfire. someone once said “ it’s really hard to motivate mailto:corinnedenae@gmail.com https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/467258?module_item_id=143051 yourself to do well if you’re just not interested in that subject matter or activity, or maybe your skill is lacking so it gets frustrating quickly.” (navigating your career journey by muerolo center for career development moreau fye week four) which has shown to be true, as i have never seen anyone be more motivated than corinne when it came to making it to a viewpoint before sunrise, or to get a campfire going despite all the wood being drenched. it seemed fitting that her last moments were spent watching the sunset off the edge of a cliff, before she wandered a little too close to the edge. corinne did have her faults, she was human, but in a way i loved her more for them. her ability to procrastinate the smallest task, to sleep 14 hours at a time, to find humor at borderline inappropriate times. her own dad said that her inability to do something perfectly the first time would hold her back from trying new things (week 5 reflection by jason bradley moreau fye week five). but she was quite self aware, and never took herself too seriously. that ability always made people around her feel comfortable and not judged for their own faults. “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). she tended to find herself in a lot of leadership roles, when it came to volleyball, or search and rescue, or planning things for her friends. she always tried to build up those around her, and push people to be the best they can be. she did this while owning up to her own errors and imperfections, and trying to lead by example. it is a hope of mine that people will remember her this way. while she died far too young, corinne had a lot of love to give. as greg boyle once said, “bridging the gulf of mutual judgment and replacing it with kinship is tricky indeed” (tattoos on the heart moreau fye week seven). she liked getting to know people from different https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ke5hs7_8hopz1rcm-vl0g29z7pndq8ccxoz9yd7o28e/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/523820?module_item_id=167949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/523820?module_item_id=167949 backgrounds, always going out of her way to be friends with exchange students, talking to friends of friends, simply out of a desire to understand people better. she worked actively against judgment for things like immigration, sexuality, race, culture, religion, and more, and thought that the only way to bring peace in turbulent political and social climates was if we sought to really understand each other's backgrounds. we have lost someone very important to all of us, and it’s a shame we will not get a chance to see the things she would have done and the people who would have had the opportunity to experience her love. what we take away, and choose to build is what corinne would have wanted us to do. part of this is taking time to reflect on our own lives and how we would want to be remembered and reminisced on at our own funerals. as fr hesburgh himself said, "my basic principle is that you don't make decisions because they are cheap; you make them because they're right." (hesburgh by jerry barca moreau fye week two). doing things with integrity and honesty and in the best interest of others is what will impact others. following your own passions, the things that bring you those brief moments of mental flow and serenity is how you will come to the end of your life with gaiety and peace, rather than regrets. “half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico lyer moreau fye week 1) it really is true that family, friends, and fulfillment is really all we need to have that life well lived, a life we wouldn’t regret when it came to an end. corinne would have been honored to see you all here today and to hear us commemorate her memory, and would want you to take the advice that i have offered in her example. she will be greatly loved and missed. thank you. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ integration three jayden vrins catherine wagner moreau integration three a life of family, kindness, and respect throughout his life, jayden vrins was guided by the values of family, kindness, and respect. it was these principles which he represented in every facet of his journey from his early childhood in the caribbean to his time in miami as well as his transition to college at the university of notre dame and finally to his professional career. jayden believed that finding your purpose and fighting for what you believe in inspires a life well lived. ultimately, his dreams were always to strive to make the world a better place and ultimately put more into the world than what he took out of it. jayden’s perspective on living a life of purpose was inspired by both the life of father hesburgh and the ambitions of terrel hunt, two precious members of the notre dame community. in an article describing hunt’s achievements after graduating from notre dame it states, “dedicated to public service, hunt works to not only strengthen u.s. diplomatic relations, but is an advocate for constructive dissent, servant leadership, and diversity within the u.s. diplomatic corps”.(domer dozen gallery, moreau week two). pursuing a career in economics similarly to terrel hunt, jayden wanted to not only pursue an academic career path he enjoyed but also one he could genuinely make a difference in. terrel hunt in that article showed jayden that this was indeed a possibility through economics. hesburgh on the other hand showed jayden the importance of living a life of inspiration. before deciding on a career in economics jayden was unsure of what career path he wanted to pursue and which one would bring him the most satisfaction. he, however, decided on economics for two reasons: the first being the influence of his black economics teacher in high school and the second because economics was a broad major so it left him a lot of options to choose from. as meruelo family center for career development at notre dame explains, “there are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much right off the bat.”(meruelo family center for career development, moreau week four). in spite of economics' broad nature which gave jayden more breathing room to decide on his career, the most influential factor in jayden’s decision to choose economics was indeed his senior year high school economics teacher who promoted racial diversity in the field of economics. https://domerdozen.nd.edu https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau in his journeys through life, jayden vrins encountered many challenges. in spite of his many setbacks and hardships, he prevailed and used them to build himself into a better man. the transition to notre dame was a huge change for jayden as it was his first time away from his family, as well as a whole new environment, and finally academically the school was a bigger challenge than high school. in spite of this, he used these challenges to mold him rather than let them break him apart. overcoming the academic pressures was one of the hardest challenges as it was a big leap from high school. early on, he got into an unhealthy pattern of constantly working hard to try to keep up with the pace. as time went on, however, he learned the importance of separating himself from school work from time to time. in the article, “why we need to slow our lives down?” they summarize jayden’s ideas stating, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape.” (“why we need to slow our lives down?” by pico lyer, moreau week one). he quickly realized that separating yourself from school work or your professional career in the future will change your life for the better because it will prevent you from developing a workaholic mentality and force you to appreciate the journey rather than just focusing on your goals solely. another challenge for jayden when he first entered college was adjusting to his new more open schedule since he was no longer doing track and field.although not a big challenge, this was a hard adjustment for him and he learned to fill his time with friends and doing other activities like clubs and playing basketball. another big obstacle for jayden during his early years at notre was being too difficult on himself and not effectively using self-reflection. in the article, “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” they discuss some negative methods of self-reflection which tend to do more harm than good. they summarize that “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential.”(“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, moreau week six). ultimately, jayden realized that sometimes it is necessary to take a pause and r appreciate everything you have already accomplished, while being grateful for everything you have. jihoon kim’s story was a very eye-opening story for jayden as it taught the importance of doing the most with what you have rather than complaining about what you can not or do not have. finally, as a family-orientated person the biggest challenge for jayden during his time in college was being away from his family. this was especially difficult because his family was so far away and most of them were international so he only was able to see them once or twice a year and they were on the older side. in spite of this, jayden learned to cherish every moment with his family so his time away definitely gave him a better perspective and appreciation of moments with loved ones. as sister theresa aletheia explains “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness, she said. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.”( '' meet the nun who wants https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham,sister theresa aletheia, moreau week three). although jayden obviously loved to spend time with his family, his separation from them gave him a greater appreciation for their time. an important part to living a well-lived life is appreciating every moment like it is your last because you never really know which moments will be your last. the most important thing for jayden in his life was always family and establishing strong healthy relationships with loved ones. he learned quickly that the best and most real relationships require sacrifice . in his speech, “why the only future worth building includes everyone”, the pope quotes mother teresa who stated "one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense."(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis,moreau week 7). jayden took this quote to heart and used it to help him mold healthy and loving relationships throughout his life whether it was re-establishing relationships with family members or forming new relationships. this was so important because the key to a happy life is having an amazing support system that wants to see you succeed. for jayden, his number one supporter was always his mother. she was always his best friend and always told him the truth when no one else did. she knew how difficult jayden always was on himself and how he always strived for perfection.she would tell him, however, that sometimes things are not going to turn out the way he always wants them to. although difficult to hear, this was important for jayden to realize and it gave him some peace of mind that not everything has to be perfect or just the way he plans it out in his head. it is evident that jayden vrins lived his life to the fullest extent. he never sacrificed his morals and always stuck to the values he developed from his family and his time at the university of notre dame. all in all what jayden wanted most was to be an example for those who come after him and to be revered and respected for all that he has done. i can say now that he accomplished that goal. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration 2 semester 2 moreau fye prof. hnatusko 4.28.22 the good life and my mission as a christian i am dedicated to living out the christian faith in every facet of my life. i want to be like jesus, to let him inform every area of my life. from my choices, to my words, to my thoughts, i want to make sure i am living in accordance with my beliefs. if i stay true to my faith and the values it entails, i will have fulfilled my duty. i hope to make people’s days better; not only to live with the future in sight but to be present in the places where god has put me, to make people smile. i want to be thankful, courageous, honest, and curious, to love everyone, to be a listener and to engage with those around me in a way that helps them be better. i will take advantage of the opportunities given to me and take care of my responsibilities with joy and vigor. i will take time to reflect, pray, and know myself more deeply. as pico iyer said: “put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i want to never be too busy to reflect, i want to make sure that i always have time to ponder the day, and think about things critically and gracefully and be constructive in my quiet time. i can start doing this by praying more, and reflecting whenever i have time, to never be too busy to turn away a moment of contemplation. to put down my phone and close my eyes. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ a way that i can keep myself on track with my mission is by emulating those role models i’ve found in my life. one such role model is fr. hesburgh, who told tim romer: “put your country before party, before politics. and always do the right thing.” ~ tim romer. (“hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week two). i will put others first and love those around me, even those i might disagree with. the united states is a beautiful land and the people in it deserve to be heard and loved and understood, even if we don’t all agree. i would like to keep the examples of people who have lived their lives to the fullest and made meaningful change in the world at the forefront of my mind when i live out my mission. it is possible, and these people have shown me how to bring beauty out of a fallen world, even when the odds seem insurmountable. i will keep in mind my finite time on the earth, before i go to see god in all his wonder and glory, that i have things to do here and to never grow lazy or give into sloth. procrastination, something i struggle with, must die. as this nun says, “to us, death is exotic, but that’s a luxury particular to our time and place.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). we should already be grateful that modern medicine and healthier living styles have increased our life expectancy significantly. to cherish every moment as a gift, with the expectation of future glory, should be our aspiration. to hear, “my good and faithful servant” at the end of my life’s journey entails living well while i am on earth. in order to maximize my time on earth, i need to discern my career and what i want to do. as the mfccd says, “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the mfccd https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ moreau fye week four). i will be active in the process to discover what fulfills me and brings me joy and brings me to people that need me or that i can help in some way, even if i don’t realize it at first. i want to discern this through both the advice of people as well as prayer and thoughtful reflection. thankfully, nothing is ever truly set in stone when it comes to educational and career paths, and i have lots of flexibility this early in my journey. i will be active in trying things out and being cautiously decisive in my choices. some conversations with my friends have pointed out my strengths and skills, and what i’m good at. i’ve been told i’m a kind “people person” who also says profound things in my seminar. i’m strong interpersonally and at critically analyzing different material. i’m creative and i enjoy reading and writing, while studying how to better people’s lives and the intersections of policy and economics also interest me greatly. (“conversations with friends” moreau fye week five). i am grateful for being able to talk with my friends about these matters and i’m sure it’ll become more clear in the future where i can direct my strengths to have the best impact possible. when i do discern i will be sure to do so in a healthy manner conducive to positive gains from reflection. while being constructively critical i will also be gracious to myself and others. “other research suggests that self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i want to ensure that i get the most out of my reflective time and in order to learn something valuable from my experience i need to have the right mindset of balance, prudence, forgiveness and appreciation and a vulnerability that accepts myself despite my flaws, and to try and be better, to be more like jesus. https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ and when i learn from my time within myself, i would like to to translate to my life directly. i must act on what i learn, especially, and part of learning involves accepting the advice that others give you and being willing to listen to and dialogue with someone with vastly different beliefs from your own. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a "you" and themselves as part of an ‘us.’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). we, us, community; at the heart of all all these ideas is a profound unity that can only be brought about by loving those around us relentlessly, regardless of what they think about certain subjects. to love as god loves is to love unconditionally; while this is hard for us humans, it’s necessary to building strong bonds and bridging the gap, whether it be political polarization, discrimination, anger and bias in any form, on either side. we must overcome with love and compassion, and open minds and hearts. part of living like this, living with care for others, is accompaniment. to accompany others is to be with them through thick and thin, to help them at all times just by being there for them, by being a shoulder to lean on. as dr. steve reifenberg says, “so maybe sustainability is, in part, to do whatever it takes (which is pih’s informal motto), and walking together, working together, discovering the path, a path that will be sustained over time, together.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by dr. steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). we can sustain each other by building each other up, by “being there” for someone else, to live the promise of companionship as a fellow human being. i will try my best to be there for others, just as they have been there for me. god has put so many people in my life that i am grateful for, and i want to be that person for someone else. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing the best way to accompany is to embrace others the way they are. “for notre dame, christ is the law by which all other laws are to be judged.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week ten). especially here at notre dame on this beautiful campus and beautiful community, we must strive to continually be kind, to accept others as they are despite our differences, be it ethnic, cultural, lingual, religious, political, and accept that these differences make our community stronger and that it can be strengthened by our acceptance of these differences. now, this does not mean pinning the blame on any one group, but rather coming together in our understanding that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of god” (romans 3:23). how can we be more understanding and loving of those different from us? one way is to avoid bubbles and the resulting echo chambers. dr. paul blaschko states something quite reasonable: “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). i want to make sure that while i engage with those who think like me (which is easy) i also engage positively with those i might disagree with about various issues or ideas. to keep in contact with people who challenge me intellectually and figure out compromises and better understandings of each other, is crucial to the health and growth of any community. it will also help us grow in respect for each other no matter how different we look or think. i offer my unique perspective of someone who is an ethnic minority, as an asian american, and a religious minority at nd (protestant christian) and someone who has lived in five states and overseas to contribute to healthy dialogue and bridging gaps. to bridge the gaps i must actively reach out to others who are different from me and stop separation of any form when i see it. “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). as the dean states, i will play my part in bringing people together, to amplify each other positively. when we all come together under the grace of god, what can stop us? what will stand in our way when we are all united in love and the pursuit of the greater good? this, then, is my mission. as my mission statement says, “success is to find value and meaning by utilizing the gifts you’ve been given to better the world around you.” and “the highest good for me is to do and live according to god’s will, to walk the path he has prepared for me all my days.” (“my mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). i will live my life earnestly, as best i can, and as god wills it i will leave this world a better place. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ integration three professor nguyen moreau first year experienceintegration three 4 march 2022 : brother, bailey, baffling today, we remember the life of , brother, son, father, and “itty bitty ben” to many. the first thing that comes to mind when we think of ben is how he prioritized having fun and making memories. he was never hesitant to remove himself from all distractions, specifically social media “obligations” and those from technology. he knew that the best experiences would come from beyond the phone and digital world, and destressed when focusing on the reality in front of him. when he was younger, he listened to a ted talk, and heard the benefits of stress-reduction programs. he found out that they exist “in part because workers find unclogging their minds’ arteries to be exhilarating” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). he applied this to his personal, everyday life, and found time in his hectic life to relax, calm down, and overall destress. this was such an important pillar to his life, and we should all follow his priorities and make time to focus on ourselves. as a lifelong fan of notre dame, and eventually an alumni, he obviously followed the life of fr. ted hesburgh. therefore, after watching the biography film about the important figure two times in his life, he was inspired by a message from the film. ben aspired to build bridges between very polarized demographics, just as fr. hesburgh did. in the film, fr. hesburgh had the belief that, even though, “we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we were all fishermen.” (“hesburgh film” moreau fye week two). throughout his life, ben applied this ideology to his relationships with others, and put aside the differences he had with them that https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 were “seemingly too hard to overcome”. no difference or disagreement was too big to be a fellow “fisherman” for ben. as his life progressed, ben started to realize the importance of “ripping off the bandaid” and getting the difficult tasks out of the way first. one idea that he typically shared was “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by new york times moreau fye week three), as opposed to “suppressing” difficult concepts. this was helpful for him as he approached the last stages of his life, where he realized hiding his fears of death were natural. instead, he embraced the time that he had left on earth, and made every last moment meaningful. we think that ben wanted to face his largest obstacles, such as an impending death that awaits us all, first, allowing him to enjoy life without stress. as he always believed, getting the difficult parts done first made the easier ones more enjoyable, and getting rid of that “cloud” over your head makes everything better. one of the most important facets of ben’s life was his career, and creating a secure foundation for his work, so that he was able to enjoy it. even since the beginning of his college years, ben continuously worked towards his career goals and pursuing a career in sports broadcasting, while also exploring entertainment as an alternative. as a freshman, he was able to call games on the radio and television, a goal he didn’t think he would reach until after graduation. meanwhile, he created funny content for people to watch, starting off with short films for his class, but expanding into work made in his free time with friends. these two paths lit a fire in his soul, and having tangible videos to reflect on was meaningful for him. he realized that these were completely his works, and saw these accomplishments as a way to approach happiness. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html early in college, ben had an important conversation with his twin brother, jack, who was with him through every stage of their lives. through this conversation, ben realized the person that he presented himself as, and how he was able to improve other people’s lives. jack told him, “ you’ve always brought light to me when i had some rough times and when i was tired of you, but i found a way to laugh anyways.” (“moreau discernment conversation” by jack bailey moreau fye week five) this was very important to ben in his life after the conversation, and he realized that he had the ability to cheer people up through humor. we think this is why he had such a passion for entertainment and comedy, because it made others better and helped them persevere through difficult times. he felt as if he had a gift in humor, and wanted to use that as much as possible to not “let it go to waste”. similar to his career, being able to make others laugh brought a new version of ben out, and he found that fire inside him after finding people laughing at his jokes. growing up near notre dame, where his area in south bend is predominantly catholic, ben found religion to be an essential part of his life. even when he encountered struggles and obstacles in his life, “itty bitty ben” found god to be consistent in his goodness. instead of going alone in his life, ben allowed god to help him navigate through difficult times. he was inspired by the story of dr. jihoon kim, who was featured on “grotto” after being paralyzed in a snowboarding accident. he said, “i reached the conclusion that god is good and that god loves us. but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering, suffering is a part of our lives, it is always there. but it is about how to respond to suffering with god.” (“5 minutes”by aria swarr moreau fye week six) as a result of this quote, ben realized that religion would be able to help him overcome obstacles, which he used a lot later in https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 life. without this quote, religion would not have been as instrumental in his life, and he would’ve tried to get through difficult times by himself. one thing that ben struggled with was the meaning of life, and how to approach this large concept of life. he constantly debated on whether or not the meaning of life could be found through love, work, relationships, etc., but couldn’t seem to figure out how to get closer to a life well-lived. however, after hearing a ted talk from pope francis, ben’s search improved. pope francis said, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) this was a great source of closure for ben, as hearing such a profound statement from the most impactful catholic authority helped him realize the true meaning of life. through this talk, ben realized that who he surrounded himself with was key to his happiness, and loving those around him and his time with them helped him pursue the “end goal” of his long life. r.i.p. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript professor chan moreau fye 28 april 2022 living a life for others i pursue a life well-lived through my mission statement. i believe very firmly that “everything is going to be ok in the end. if it is not ok, then it is not the end” (“mission statement” by moreau fye week 13). by living this way, i have been able to create a new opportunity for myself, the opportunity to each day become better than the man that went to sleep last night. (after some thought, i decided to change my mission statement to something that is more applicable towards my life.) i have spent so much time trying to develop as a human. i have struggled, suffered, and grinded my way through all these hardships in my life. one thing that has kept me going is my learning mentality. i believe that if we live with a closed-minded mentality, we will be missing out on so much, because “good teachers are usually good learners. they are curious, open to new ways of thinking about the world, and enthusiastic about engaging and sharing those insights with others” (“teaching accompaniment:a learning journey together” by  steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i think that to truly learn though, we need to find answers. my personal problem has been that i  “tend to search for the easiest and most plausible answers.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). i think that for me to be a good learner, i need to start looking for different, more expansive answers that will offer much more than the answer to some basic question i am asked. the key to living a well-rounded life is learning, so we need to learn from our hardships and learn from others. i have certainly seen my fair share of hardships, and i firmly believe that these are what make me who i am. i pride myself on pushing past these hardships and not being afraid to work my tail off to beat them. “i have never seen someone so determined to come back and be better than where you left off. you were pushing yourself beyond every limit you had from your physical status to your education, to even your mental health.”  (“interview” by brad west moreau fye week five). this world is full of so much going on, from politics, to wars, to diseases, to just general chaos. this can be very overwhelming at first, but if we take a chance to clarify ourselves, we can start to see this world in new detail. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping further back and standing still that we can begin to see what the canvas really means.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the world i have been brought up in, although i have loved it, is not without its flaws. i am from just outside baltimore, maryland, and all over the news there have been protests and rally’s regarding the black lives matters movement. knowing this, i attended several peaceful protests, and did my best to show my support for the community. i saw friendships end, households divide, all over the matter of if people of color should be allowed to live the same way that white people do. “it is urgent that we recognize that human rights are under threat all around the world, including here in the united states”(“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i think that society and my religion have taught me so much, and have pushed me to become who i am, as we are all products of our environments. “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by notre dame moreau fye week 10). i have seen myself and those around me become products of our environment. i have seen myself become more and more like the people i surround myself with every day. i think that this is in part because of how i try to keep an open mind, and try to expose myself to new things, but it is often difficult to do these things without succumbing to the “echo chamber.” it is super easy to surround ourselves with people who all have the same opinions as us, and share the exact same views and beliefs, but i think that this is not the way to live things. “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall.”(“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career servicesmoreau fye week four) living this way, with people who will not change us and force us to adapt and change for the better is how we become stagnant, and will see so little growth amongst ourselves and each other. there is certainly an extent of adaptation that all of us need to undergo, because without adapting to our environment, we cannot change ourselves, and cannot truly become better than the past versions of ourselves. “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). i think, although it is difficult, it is the right thing to do by surrounding yourself with people who are going to challenge you on more levels than just physical. “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out.” (“tattoos on the heart”, by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven) i have seen the most growth in myself when i am forced to take down my walls, and allow my environment to change, and have seen some people who i do not agree with at first become some of my closest friends, and become the people who push me past my limits, and make me a better person because of it.  throughout my future here at notre dame, and even past it, i plan to continue to live out my mission statement. i am very aware that i have made mistakes and will almost certainly make more of them in my future. “nobody is perfect, but how can we set ourselves on the right path, apart from the rest?” (“hesburgh video” by jerry barce and christine o’malleymoreau fye week two). by living my mission statement, i can separate myself from the crowd, because i have learned that out of everything, my discipline is what has kept me going and is going to be what sets me apart from the rest of the world. i think that for me, one thing that i have been able to confidently say, is that my discipline and what i do make me happy, which is something that i don’t think very many people can say. this mission statement gives me internal peace and joy, and  “remember, only you can finally say, ‘this is a genuine source of joy in my life!’”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). in my life, i plan to follow my mission statement, and spread this to others. i think that the way i have lived through this statement is one that i am very proud of, and i can confidently say that my discipline and motivation through this mission statement have gotten me to where i am today. i will continue to live out my mission statement, and plan to use it to make myself into a better version of myself each and every day.  capstone integration professor whittington moreau 29 april 2022 being a force for good in this world mission statement it is very important for me to live my life to the fullest with no regrets. with this, i am going to seize opportunities that are presented to me. i am going to be courageous in these opportunities, facing situations with bravery in the face of uncertainty. i am going to stay headstrong in my faith, following god’s plan for my life and continuing to have a relationship with him. i am going to grow in wisdom by surrounding myself with people who are different from me, challenging my own ideas with the perspectives of others. i am going to live a life true to myself, and not alter my own viewpoints or identity to please others. i am going to embrace the times i suffer, and use what i learn in these times to help me later in life. i am going to be a source for good in this world, helping those who are less fortunate and projecting positive emotions that can help someone in a time of their own suffering. while i am going to help others, i am also going to focus on myself as well by taking the time to reflect and focus on the present. i will also be mindful of how my presence affects others, and how it is important to think about the consequences of my actions. i am going to live everyday with purpose, surround myself with good people, and hope to make a small impact in this world. integration in my short time here at notre dame, i have already seen how the people and atmosphere have shaped my beliefs, values, and identity. one of the biggest reasons i chose to attend this college was because of how welcoming everyone is and how highly every single person regarded the school. i completely understand what they were talking about now that i have experienced it for myself, and it has led me to think about the next three years of my notre dame experience and how i want to live it. by writing my mission statement, it has allowed me to reflect on the aspects of my life that i want to both change and grow, and how i want to portray my mission statement to others through my actions and words. i am excited for the endless possibilities my future holds for me at notre dame, and how i will capitalize on these opportunities to better myself and those around me. in my mission statement, i express how i am going to live my life to the fullest with no regrets. to me, this means being courageous in the face of uncertain circumstances. it is so easy to shy away from a difficult situation, and i am not going to lie and say i am perfect because i have never done such a thing. i have been a coward in many moments when i knew i should not be, and it has caused me to live with regret. i do not want to live this way. as dean g. marcus cole simply stated, “we must do something.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g marcus cole moreau fys week twelve). we cannot sit back and do nothing in the face of difficulty. this is why i am going to portray my mission statement by speaking out about the issue of human trafficking while i am still a student at notre dame. i am going to join the new club that will be meeting next school year, and discuss how we can provide more awareness to the issue and discuss ways we can combat the problem. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ another important thing i have prioritized is that i am going to be headstrong in my faith by following god’s plan for my life. this means multiple things for me. in my life, i have had moments where i have struggled with my faith. i would like to say this has not been a problem since attending notre dame, but that simply is not the truth. one of the ways i have struggled was by being confused why he could let bad things happen when he is good. this was particularly present in week two, when i watched the hesburgh film. something that stood out to me was when father hesburgh said, “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering…” (“hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fys week two). this really resonated with me, and allowed me to fully develop my belief that everything happens for a reason. we might not understand why god allows situations to take place, and we might not understand how something good could be a product of something bad, but there is meaning behind everything. in the next three years, i am going to remember this, and be someone who can see good in every situation. i want to be someone my friends can come to for advice, and i want to be able to provide comfort to those who are suffering. another way i am going to be headstrong in my faith is by being patient with god. throughout my relationship with him, i have found myself questioning his existence, questioning his will for my life, and wondering if he is even listening to me. something that really stood out to me about this was from week ten, which said, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fys week ten). this was an eye opener for me. i realized that questioning his existence is pointless because i will never see him or know with 100% certainty that he loves me. however, i can talk to him through prayer, and ask him to show me what he wants me to do with my life. in the next three years, i am going to make more of an effort to develop a https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 relationship with god, and take more time to talk to him through prayer. i am going to take what he tells me and act on it in front of my friends, family, and community. i am going to spread his love to those around me and hope that they feel it too. another way i am going to live out my mission statement is by growing in wisdom. one way i will do this is by surrounding myself with people who differ from me. “we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree, and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fys week eleven). growing up in a small town, i found myself surrounded by people who all thought the same, and it caused me to also believe what they believed. when i arrived at notre dame, i was challenged by people who thought differently from me, and it allowed me to discern my own beliefs. this is something i think is really important. we have to challenge ourselves in our knowledge. we cannot be close-minded and unwilling to listen to other opinions. in the next three years i am going to continue to expose myself to people who i disagree with, and make sure people know that i will not judge them for their beliefs and opinions. i do not want to be seen as someone who is judgemental, and i want to engage in challenging conversation with others. in our world today, suffering exists everywhere. we cannot escape it. the world is not perfect, and so we should embrace the inevitable suffering. i included this in my mission statement because in my experience, i have learned the most through my own suffering and by witnessing others. in the future, i want to help those who are suffering by accompanying them through it. “compassion is not only to suffer for the other, but it is also to be in sympathy with another. it means to be close to the other, to accompany the other” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg” moreau fys week nine). i am going to be https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit an understanding person in times i do not understand. i am going to help people who are suffering themselves, and be a source of comfort to those around me. while it is a huge priority of mine to help people, i am also going to focus on myself as well. in order to make a difference towards others, i have to make sure my well-being is healthy and strong. “the point of sitting still is it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fys week one). taking the time to relax and reflect on yourself is essential in life. doing so everyday makes a huge difference in how you perform daily tasks and interact with others. happiness is key. you must focus on your own happiness so others can be happy too. another way i can focus on myself comes from week three, “the concept is appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fys week three). one of the biggest things i learned about my first year at notre dame is that time flies by. i cannot believe my first year is almost over, and it makes me sad thinking about it. i wish i could go back and appreciate this past year more, but i cannot. the only thing i can do is be more appreciative and by using the decisions i make in the present to lead to a successful future. in regards to myself, i am also going to be self-aware in how i affect others. “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fys week six). this is another reason why it is important to focus on yourself in order to help others. we have to be mindful of how our actions affect others, and how our behaviors can be watched and imitated. i have found myself in moments where i have been selfish and not contemplated https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ how my actions could affect others. this has caused me some issues in the past, and i am going to make sure i am more mindful in the future. i think an important piece of advice i have received was from my dad in the discernment activity from week five. he simply stated, “always be true to yourself” (“discernment conversation activity” by bob burgess moreau fys week five). in my first year of college, i have encountered ‘fake’ people, and i have found myself conforming to outside expectations that i do not agree with. an important aspect of a life well-lived is to be authentic. pretending to be something you are not is exhausting, and i am going to make sure i am genuine to everyone i encounter for the next three years. another way i am going to be true to myself is by picking a career. “...career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fys week four). in the next three years, i am going to figure out what i want to do with my life, and how i want my future to look. i think it is important that i think about what will truly make me happy, instead of thinking about it from a money standpoint. i do not want to be miserable in my job, so i need to be true to myself and what makes me happy. the best part about my time at notre dame has been the people. as pope francis said, “…life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fys week seven). i am a firm believer that if i did not have the friends i have made while in college, i would not enjoy it half as much. i have made long lasting memories and friendships, and i could not imagine my life without them. life is so much more meaningful when you are surrounded by people who love and support you. in the next three years, i hope i am lucky to continue developing fruitful https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis relationships. i hope i can be a source of good in their life, and that all of us will leave impactful impressions in each other’s lives. i want to leave the world a better place than when i found it. i truly believe with my notre dame education, i will make a small difference, even if it is just in the lives of those closest to me. in my eyes, a life well-lived is simple. be a good person. being a force for good in this world goes a long way. evil, jealousy, greed, etc. taint our world and cause negativity to spread and affect others. spreading a tiny amount of positivity can do amazing things. you never know how one of your actions will affect another person. enjoy your time on this earth, love others, and live your life to the fullest with no regrets. : capstone integration 04/29/2022 mission statement: a quest to change the world in the end, all we are remembered for is the way we treated others. the kindness and warmth with which we faced the world is remembered by those who were impacted, either positively or negatively, and it should be our life’s aim to act out of good. the aim of a mission statement is to express the specific goals that an institution or company should strive to achieve, but with individual mission statements, that can be thwarted to include multiple aspirations and achievements in life. simply put, personal mission statements should aim to answer the question, “what would i want to change in the world?” (moreau fye week five). my ultimate goal in life is to relieve the suffering of others and contribute, possibly, to a more equitable world, where equal access to opportunity is guaranteed. therefore, i make it my mission to give and to not take for granted the possessions that i hold and the love that i accumulate from those around me (moreau fye week thirteen). there is always room for improvement, and i, like anyone else, can get better in relieving the suffering of others in ways that better their lives. this can come from acts that i currently do, such as volunteering, or acts that i would like to commit later, such as relieving the mental health tensions that surround low income communities by opening an affordable health clinic. relieving the suffering of others is a clear path to fulfilling myself in ways that material possessions cannot. first, i look to thoroughly understand the different injustices that people face in the world. robin diangelo addresses the fact that there is virtually little to no exposure to the multiple perspectives of racism, especially in a systemic setting, (why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism, moreau fye week ten). to stop injustice, we need to understand https://docs.google.com/document/u/1/d/1odebgrvorveufdapka04tptffydrzha9epar40jkr74/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/12stwrbshyf7rkowuyew3s84ftewmmqsnirbddp7xo0m/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit each other through our own perspectives. through understanding, accompaniment can be initiated, and mutual respect and value can be garnered between the assistant and the assisted. as steve reifenberg states, “the concept of accompaniment has given me a new lens through which to understand my own experiences,” (teaching accompaniment, moreau fye week nine). accompaniment contributes to open mindedness, so i will approach understanding with an open mind, and allow my limitations on issues to be expanded. through understanding, i will learn to hold others and their experiences in high regard and allow them to speak on their own, instead of speaking for them. to give, i look to offer donations to charities and individuals who aim to positively impact the lives of others on both small and large scales. through my education, i hope to open a mental health clinic for low income communities, as a way of giving back to my home. i realize that this experience positively helps those who cannot afford mental health treatment. i can “...create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart,” (tattoos on the heart, father greg boyle, moreau fye week seven). i seek to participate in more efforts to alleviate suffering through volunteer work and optimism. my effort to not take the things i have for granted will hopefully result in a greater sense of gratitude and a more compelling sense of willingness to give rather than to take. i aim to maintain cordial relationships by being open about my feelings and experiences. i value the opinions of others, but with courage, i aim to never let the judgement of others sway me from making the right decisions. “echo chambers are more dangerous than moles, because of their ability to lock us into certain world views,” (how to avoid an echo chamber , paul blashcko, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd moreau fye week eleven). by not participating in an echo chamber, i can be provided the opportunity to help others free from emotion, rather than having a clouded judgement. “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes,” (hesburgh film, moreau fye week two), so of course, many of the things outlined may not go to plan. my biggest challenge is my ability to overthink, and i never reach out for help except to those around me. however, “it’s precisely those who are busiest who most need to give themselves a break,” (why we need to slow down our lives, iyer 2014, moreau fye week one).this proves that intentions should matter more than consequences, and that i should always aim to do the right thing. like father michael himes said, “joy is the delight one takes in being dissatisfied,” (three key questions, father michael himes, moreau fye week three). the personal obstacles that we face daily when trying to figure ourselves out have a simple solution: “why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future,” (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, moreau fye week six). the key to finding ourselves and being in a permanent state of joy, is asking what instead of why. it gives us the most positive outlook instead of keeping us in a negative self-loathing cycle. this joy ties into my career, as i should not expect to be happy, but i should not be dissatisfied either. dr. donald super argues that being satisfied with your career heavily depends on how much you have implemented your self concept into it. the four aspects of self concept needed to be considered when choosing a career path are values, interests, personality and skill (navigating your career journey, moreau fye week four). overall, we are still separated by the hate that cowers communities in general, and to end that, we should end the separation by interacting with those around us (i am george floyd…, https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/468294?module_item_id=143819 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ dean g. marcus cole, moreau fye week twelve). with all my solutions to the issue of suffering in communities briefly outlined above, i hope that i have acted with courage in pursuing a life of meaning (integration three, moreau fye week eight). https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z5qqwaf5wvnjmgxq4uhde_htifdrcuu6ztghmkghaeg/edit my dash my dash was like a shot of espresso, sunshine bottled up in a 5-foot frame, a perpetual smile. she found joy in each crevice of life: the snow, running, sunsets and sunrises, the stars, math, historical fiction, skiing, bluebirds, flowers, reading in the rain, watching the gilmore girls. most of all, she found the greatest joy tangled in the smiles of others. at least, this is what i hope people say in my eulogy. when thinking about my death i cringe a bit, death was always one of my greatest fears. however, not to relate another integration to tiktok but today i saw a video talking about normalizing death as something natural and not something to exactly fear. it immediately reminded me of the article about the nun who wants us to remember death. while morbid, this article stuck with me as a constant reminder that life will at one point end; “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html moreau fye week 3). death is not something to fear but something to remind us to never take a single second for granted. i only have a snippet of time to explore the world and make sh*t happen. so, i hope when i die i know i didn’t waste a moment and i use that as inspiration each day. when i go out i want to dance like nobody's watching, absorb every minute detail, run as much as i can, listen to the birds and appreciate our little piece of paradise. so, rather than dreading the day i leave this earth i want to leave knowing i lived like there was no tomorrow. with that being said, when i die i hope my bones are weak and worn because of how much i ran and traveled and climbed and skied. i hope my hair is gray and my eyes are a bit tired from how hard i worked. however, most of all i hope my eyes are lined with wrinkles that show https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html i smiled and laughed the same way my mom’s are. my mom, my greatest inspiration, the woman who personifies kindness and love, is who i hope i can live up to in my life. she reminds me of father hesburgh from the hesburgh film; she is the greatest force for kindness i have ever met. she never let my sister or i think we couldn’t do something great and led by example every day caring for her patients as a physical therapist. never once does she ask for a thank you, all she does is ignite goodness in the world the same way father hesburgh did (“hesburgh”https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7e ca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau fye week 2). while yes i want to promote change like father hesburgh, i want to make change the same way my mom does. her incredible character and passion for her job are why i dream of being a prosthetist because i want to help make others' lives better. most of all, i want to put a smile on someone's face the same way my mom does. the impact my mom has had on the person i am today and the person i want to be tomorrow is why i talked to her for my week 5 reflection. during this, we talked about how competitive i am and my perfectionistic tendencies and while i know it's very true it is also something i hope people don’t talk about in my eulogy (conversation with mommoreau fye week 5). so, i want to try to slow my life down and really appreciate each moment more rather than stressing about what i am doing tomorrow or what test i have coming up. “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by iyer https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ moreau fye week 1). it feels like i am rushing through life so to improve this i want to take more time to just appreciate the moment. i have been trying to start journaling more and focusing on gratitude as well as taking moments to https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ reflect on my day. additionally, i want to be more spontaneous and not worry as much about winning or being the best and rather just worry about being the happiest i can be. to do this i am trying to spend more time focusing on the present and living in the moment rather than stressing over the future. to the same point i also want to spend less time trapped in the past worrying about if i did something wrong; ““why” questions trap us in our past, “what” questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ moreau fye week 6 ). every moment is a chance to learn but not turn yourself into the victim, rather i want to spend my time learning from the past but not dwelling on it. it’s too beautiful of a life to sit wrapped up in wondering “why” you’re like this and to start wondering “what” you can do to improve yourself and be a better person. recently, i have been extremely anxious and i was spending lots of time wondering “why” me? why do i have to have such bad anxiety when everyone around me seems fine? after reading this article i changed that phrase to what can i do to help my anxiety? what tools are there to help me calm down when i am having a tough day? by doing this i have seen my anxiety improve tremendously. this can be applied to anything like instead of why am i doing so bad in this class and ask what can i do to improve? instead of why did i act like that yesterday, ask what can i do to be a better person? i hope to carry this especially into my kids life because in the end the past is the past and you can't control the future so might as well just enjoy the present and become the best version of yourself that you can be. as someone reads my eulogy, i hope it is filled with stories from all over the world and is sprinkled with jokes and puns. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!”(navigating your career journey https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ -moreau fye week https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ 4). my goal is to just make some type of difference in this world. i don’t need to be known by everyone but i hope the people who do know me think of me with a smile. this is why i really want to work in a third-world country or impoverished area to create prosthetics. just in my time in enable, i see what an impact a new prosthetic can have on someone's life and i hope to be able to share that with everyone who wants one. specifically, i dream of helping runners who are looking for prosthetic devices because running has truly been the greatest thing to ever happen to me. when i run my mind is free and i am the most simple form of happiness. additionally, i hope when i die my life can be filled with many different countries. i always loved language and different cultures and i hope i can spend time truly learning about them. but, i don’t want these stories around the globe to be in a 5-star hotel. i want them to be in a small apartment that is the center of everyday life, truly understanding what it is like to live in a foreign place. i hope, more than just having a eulogy full of stories, my eulogy is full of people. during week 7 we talked about the importance of relationships; “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript moreau fye week 7). just being at notre dame i have met more inspiring people than i could ever imagine and have learned so much about myself like that i love to have fun but i also genuinely enjoy studying and doing homework. i have met people who are pessimistic and mean but i have also met people who have the kindest hearts and greatest ambition. while i don’t see myself being friends with the pessimists they still have acted as a reminder of how much someone else's attitude can affect those around them. so, whenever i am feeling down or negative i try to find a reason to wear a smile. equally, this place is filled with so many brilliant people that inspire me to work harder, love better, and smile larger. for https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript instance, thomas in my usem is probably one of the most intelligent and curious people i have ever met and i aspire to share that same fervor for knowledge, or ashlyn is the most charismatic human i could ever meet and i aspire to listen and care the same way she does, or maddie is the most ambitious person i know and i aspire to dream without boundaries the same way she does. beyond being inspired by these people, i hope i can inspire at least someone with my kindness and curiosity. this is why i hope, if i live long enough, that when i one day retire from making prosthetics i can work as a math teacher because i know how incredibly influential all my teachers were in developing my complete and utter love for the subject. i have no clue what they will say in my eulogy but i hope when i die my dash on my tombstone between the date of birth and the date of death means something. most of all, i hope when someone reads my eulogy they’re smiling because life is meant to be celebrated. final integration professor espeseth moreau 3/19/2022 finding meaning in every moment “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). after reading about memento mori, i realized that in order to live a meaningful life that i can be proud of when i die, i need to find meaning. however, i do not only want a few moments that i can be proud of but rather i want an accumulation of impactful moments. we only get married once, have children a few times, and only celebrate birthdays once a year. however every other day we wake up, eat, get ready, and have a dozen interactions with others. it is these so-called mediocre moments that we forget when we do not make the most out of them. thus, my mission statement is to make mediocre moments meaningful by having a sense of purpose. at this point in time, many of my moments are consumed by stress. it is said that “stress will be the epidemic of the twenty-first century” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). with the constant approach of exams, papers, and the looming possibility of medical school, i have felt the pressure to excel daily. i often do miss being able to be carefree, and never having to worry. however, i’ve found that “[t]he purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering. suffering is part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering from god” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). i think it is unrealistic to expect that at some point, i will be free from hardships. however, understanding how to embrace the good and bad moments as a part of who i am is so important https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ to how i can approach every day. i hope that i can develop a better attitude towards hardships and see them as a part of who i am. i have come to understand that “[e]very experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau family center for career development moreau fye week four). being able to learn from the good and bad moments has been so impactful. however, to become a person who i can be proud of i need to fill my time with positive experiences. the experiences of helping others as well as surrounding myself with others who lift me up will give me the avenue to develop into a better person. one of the things that drew me to notre dame is the spirit of inclusion that they have fostered. their mission statement says, “christians have found their life together enriched by the different qualities of their many members, and they have sought to increase this richness by welcoming others who bring additional gifts, talents and backgrounds to the community” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life moreau fye week ten). these past few years, notre dame has created a more diverse community with each new class. i have really appreciated the effort being made because this allows me to surround myself with people different from myself and become better informed. the legacy that father hesburgh created also created the legacy and spirit of doing what is right. in the documentary that followed his life, it stated, “this was someone who was totally committed to his country, to his faith, and to what was right” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i am so glad to be a part of a community that is not self-serving but rather can join together to serve others. i have seen the dangers that occur when “[b]ubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i think that i can find a wider purpose by working against echo chambers and advocating for others. pope francis stated, “[w]e can only build a future by standing together and including everybody” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). i think the most important way that i can make the most out of the mediocre moments is by standing up for what i believe in whenever i can. i believe in equality and inclusion, and if i can stand with others in times of need i would be able to find my purpose. “solidarity is about our relationship with the other, and through the practice of accompaniment we make it real and move it forward” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). the relationships that i have been able to form thus far have formed the most memorable times. we have gone through many tough times together, but i’ve never been able to laugh as hard as when i am with them. the congregation of the holy cross states, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve). outside of my personal relationships, i hope to make the moments of my professional life meaningful by being able to form a relationship with my patients. i have been able to scribe for a pediatrician last summer, and the relationship she had with the parents and children were inspiring. she was a part of their emotional support system, and the large impact i could see that she was making was especially inspiring. “god’s grace prompts human activity to assist the world in creating justice grounded in love” (“university of notre dame mission statement” by university of notre dame moreau https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ fye week thirteen). i hope to be able to advocate for my patients in the future, in a similar manner that she was able to. in this way, i can personally work against injustice in my own way. “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor” (“week five dsicernment conversation activity” moreau activity moreau fye week five). while i may not have the answers or complete understanding to be able to accomplish everything right now, i hope that i can learn and develop more throughout college and whatever else may happen. through these times, i hope i can be positively impacted by my community and impact my community in meaningful ways that i can continue in the future. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit moreau integration – eulogy ladies and gentlemen, as we gather today to remember the hayden’s life, we must remember his greatest beliefs, values, and convictions. the things he strived to live up to most, even if he never fully did. hayden’s beliefs inspired what he did and said, as “our words are buttressed by our deeds, and our deeds are inspired by our convictions” (conaghan quoting hesburgh – week two). hayden always asked what type of person he wanted to be, not what did he most wanted to do, allowing himself to hold most important his faith and deepest convictions. one of the most important things for hayden was getting out of his comfort zone. this first occurred to hayden during his week five moreau assignment in a conversation with his father. when asked about a time when hayden was in the zone, he quickly responded that he saw it when hayden delivered a speech at his graduation ceremony. this struck hayden as odd because it was an event which was very uncomfortable for him, which made him nervous, even though it ultimately turned out very well. it made him realize that many of the times when he was at his best were these times when he had to rise to the occasion. another similar moment for hayden was the sectional golf tournament his senior year of high school, when on a frigid morning he would need to shoot the best round of his season for a chance to advance in the state tournament, and sure enough he did. it was these types of uncomfortable moments when hayden excelled the most. as many of you know, hayden was a quiet man. introverted and often shy, hayden valued contemplation and reflection on his days. he recognized clearer than many that “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (iyer – week one). rest gave hayden to look back, take a breath, but that never meant he was not thinking. even when sitting down after a long day to watch an episode of the sopranos, he would write and reflect about themes he saw in the shows. contemplation and reflection also allowed hayden to continually bring his faults to the front of his life, and instead of suppressing them, working on them intentionally to fix them. quick to take responsibility for his own wrongs, hayden learned “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs. asking why might have the opposite effect” (eurich – week six). by believing this is the way to deal with his issues, he did his best to never have a victim mentality, taking ownership of his own life. while deeply focused on becoming a better person himself, hayden never let that get in the way of his relationship with others, and in fact, looked to better himself through his relationships. like pope francis, hayden believed, “that each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not merely time passing by, life is about interactions” (pope francis – week seven). hayden aspire to always influence others positively. a regular blood donor for much of his life, hayden was inspired by the frequent blood transfusions his younger brother had to receive throughout much of his cancer treatment. this left a last impact on him that we ought to do all we can, no matter how small or large, to help others. though he may argue career ambition and financial success was secondary to hayden’s desires to live out his faith, he worked hard in all that he did. during much of his college years he would often complain that when he told people he was a math major he would have no way to reply to the inevitable question of “what do you want to do with that?” nevertheless, when hayden did find what he wanted to do, he sunk his teeth in and dug deep, achieving all that he could. he would give the advice to all in career discernment that “if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (career development center – week four). it is important to dedicate and allot specific time to think about these important questions because they will put you down a certain unique path for the rest of your life. golf was a sport that hayden took up young, but only got serious about in the beginning of high school. though dreaming of one day making his way to the tour, he knew that it was at the end of the day not going to be possible, as he just was not quite good enough and by the time he gained passion for the sport had not near enough time to practice in order to become great. nevertheless, golf is a passion which stuck with hayden for his entire life. it brought him joy and frustration, laughs and swears, and most importantly great memories. i will finish today with some advice which hayden would give to all of you now if he were still here to say it, which is that though we may not like to think about it, all of our days are numbered. it is important to remind ourselves of this so that we may be able to properly order our limited time. as sister aletheia states, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (graham – week three). without the knowledge that we are only here for a short while, we lose sight of what is truly important, and miss out on it while wasting time doing stupid stuff. remember to pursue virtue, meaning, and purpose in all of its forms, for what better way to spend a life than on that? if nothing else, do it in memory of hayden. peggy hnatusko moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 one man can change the world: ’s eulogy “live your life as if you know your dreams cannot fail.” it is safe to say that alexander “tiki” stanton wackowski lived by this motto. from visiting city after city, to working hard, tiki created the perfect balance in his life, leaving little time for sleep and a lot of time for fun. his story, however, is far from over. tiki believed that his story would be defined by the impact he made on other people’s lives. tiki was not satisfied with being just another “average joe.” he wanted every life he came across to be touched by his presence. in moments of darkness, tiki used his positive light as a guide for not only himself but others as well. his loving, hard working side was inspired by his mother. his fierce competitive nature was inspired by his father. each and every one of his siblings motivated him to be a lover and protector. as a baby, tiki was given the nickname “mr. sunshine” because it is said that he could light up a room with his smile. the name has stuck with him because he tried to use my light to positively affect the lives of those around me. tiki was gifted with an innate ability to want to help others. in his efforts to shed light on the lives of those around me, however, he was often told: “one man cannot change the world.” throughout his life, he endeavored to prove this statement wrong. tiki took away many lessons during his lifetime. just a few of them are listed below: life moves incredibly fast. before you know it, you are all grown up and left to figure things out on your own. in life, it is truly important to slow down and take a break. it is very easy to get wrapped up in finding success, which is great and should be applauded; however, a never-ending chase for success can cause one to lose sight of what is truly important: quality time with family and friends, stable mental and physical health, and so much more. this chase for success frequently has many adverse side-effects: stress, anxiety, depression, etc. as with everything in life, it is important to create a balance in order to maintain relationships, health, and more. without this balance – regardless of the levels of success that can be achieved – life can drive many to a breaking point. (" why we need to slow down our lives " by pico iyer moreau fye week one) as a lifelong notre dame fan, tiki was inspired by father hesburgh and his lifelong commitment to service to the world’s people and the catholic church. in the very last line of the movie hesburgh, father hesburgh stated, “let us all ponder the words of our good lord: whatever you do to one of these my least brethren, you did it to me” (" hesburgh " moreau fye week two). in accordance with father hesburgh’s statement, one part of the notre dame mission statement reads, “the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice”. one of father hessburgh’s greatest attributes was his ability to use the resources he had in order to act on his faith and do good unto others. the latter half of father hesburgh’s statement is taken from matthew 25:40, which calls upon all followers of god to do service not only for their brothers and sisters, but for god as well. throughout tiki’s life, he frequently reminded himself that he only lives once. in accordance with the famous acronym “yolo,” tiki lived life with no regrets, remembering that https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 he only had one shot at this life, and that his life was meant to be joyful. many of the decisions he made in life were based on the simple questions, “where am i headed, [and] where do i want to end up?” (" meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die " by ruth graham moreau fye week three). frequently, humans are posed with many decisions that can be detrimental to our futures. whenever he found himself in situations where he was forced to make a difficult decision, he asked himself “where am i headed, [and] where do i want to end up?” these questions are part of the reason he decided to come to the university of notre dame. in his decision to come notre dame, he took into consideration how prestigious of a university it is and their boundless drive to serve others. he always hoped that at some point in his life, he could do well enough to help not only himself and his family, but his community and the world around him. he believed that he should act in a way that (i.) brings myself joy, (ii.) brings out the best in me, and (iii.) brings others joy. tiki always believed that diversity of interest was beautiful and essential to the prosperity of the world. he understood that not all humans are the same: what he enjoyed was completely different from what many other people enjoy. his skill set was completely different from the skill set of many others. this is neither good nor bad, but it does teach us one, very important lesson: a life well lived-looks different for everyone, and that is why it is so important for each person to test the waters, experience life, find their passions, and most importantly, follow their passions. without following your passions and doing what you love, life can become bland, meaningless, and hopeless; so, do what you love” (" navigating your career journey ” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). during his freshman year of college, tiki had a very meaningful conversation with his roommate, evan. in this conversation, evan gave him the opportunity to ask him questions and https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ was gracious in his responses: evan made tiki feel special and like he made an impact on the lives of others around him. here is a brief summary of their interaction, as documented by tiki. evan told tiki that he held an immense value on loyalty. this is so because he gave loyalty to those he loved, and expected the same loyalty in return. additionally, evan told tiki that he was at his best whenever tiki was out, making connections with others. evan noticed that he found tiki at peak happiness whenever he was in social situations and around people that he loved. most notably, evan told tiki that it is in my nature to care about others and their needs, and that one of his biggest priorities was putting a smile on the face of others. (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five) tiki seriously believed in the power of positivity. in times of struggle, it is very easy to complain. during these teams, it appears as if it is in the nature of humans to blame other people or things for their problems. despite human beings’ natural tendency to develop a negative attitude in times of distress, if humans work to remain positive, positive results are more likely to come about. this idea is a reflection of the famous statement, “if you believe it, it will happen.” nothing in life is ever achieved without a sense of belief in oneself. all human beings face adversity; with this being said, it is not always about the adversity faced, but rather the response to the adversity faced. when responding with a positive attitude, the possibilities for success are endless! tiki believed that if you believed something, it could happen! (“ 5 minutes ” by aria swarr moreau fye week six) finally, and arguably most importantly, tiki seriously did believe that he had the power to make a positive impact on the world. he believed that for human beings, it is important to keep in mind that one singular being truly can have an impact on the lives of others. often, people see themselves as hopeless individuals because they do not believe that they have the https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 capacity to make an impact on the world. people get wrapped up in their own bubbles and fail to see the impact they can make on the lives of others. however, every moment we spend on earth we are making an impact. people can make an impact on their small circles and their impact on the world can be exponential: if an individual works to make an impact on their community, that impact can be spread from one individual to another, and the world can change a great deal. ultimately, he believed that this impact has the power to develop relationships, create a better world for those living in the present, and to create a better future. (“ why the only future worth building includes everyone ” by pope francismoreau fye week seven) his life led him to one profound acclamation: one man can change the world. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript lauckkayleintegration3 kelly harrington moreau fys 4 march 2022 in loving memory kayle was taken from us too soon. yet, in her short life, she impacted many people around her. all felt her kindness, and her closest friends and family presence is already missed. kayle was a very busy student and loved her time on campus at the university of notre dame. but, her passing signals us all to remember to take advantage of all of the moments we have left on this earth because we never know which will be our last. it is imperative for those who are busy, like kayle was, to remember: “yet, it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). take breaks from your work and use those breaks to spend time with your family and friends. anyone who knew kayle knew how much she cared for public service. fr. hesburgh of her alma matter shared this care as well. he provided this message to a student running for office: “serve our country. put your country before party and before politics. always do the right thing” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). this advice was something kayle took to heart as she tried to emulate doing the right things as she set goals for herself. kayle strove to live her life trying to do the right thing. if she would have had more time, she would have tried to live out the rest of her life under that rule as well, especially if she would have been given the opportunity to pursue more public service roles. one of the most admirable aspects of kayle’s life was her undeniable passion and drive for pursuing a more just future. some enter college not yet knowing their passions but with skills equipped to find something they will excel in. kayle would have been the first to admit she was not as academically prepared for notre dame as some students on campus, but she came with a drive and passion that made her stick out to her professors and peers. she knew the importance of discovering these passions for oneself: “... no one but you can say this is my joy. you must discover this for yourself!” (“three key question” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). kayle truly found her joy in working for others and extending a helping hand wherever she could. while kayle may have known her passions in life, she knew she needed more tools to achieve her goals. however, kayle developed a new purpose in college: the importance of exploring the world. because kayle’s time was cut short, her memory is a testament to using our short time on earth to go out and gain more experiences. in fact, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” from meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). kayle knew herself well in her short years on earth and tried to experience all she could, but we can learn from her passions the importance of trying new things while we still have the chance. those closest to kayle knew her passions and knew how deeply she cared for those around her. kayle’s boyfriend said of her: “[kayle was] most passionate and most alive when [she was] helping others and juggling a million things” (“discernment conversation activity” with isaac mccormick moreau fye week 5). we should all strive to have something in life that we come alive for in doing that work. even better yet is finding that joy in work that helps others. kayle was always a dreamer. she set her goals high and was willing to do whatever it took to reach those goals. in those efforts, she could often lose track of time. while she cared deeply for her work, she often missed out on the small moments she could have shared with friends. if she was here now, i think she would say among her only regrets would be worrying so much about the future that she forgot to live in the present. an applicable quote to this sentiment states: “i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or on what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr, grotto moreau fye week 6). kayle always tried to do her best. in working to do this, she encouraged those around her to do their best as well. her final years were spent living through a pandemic, massive social justice movements, and aggressive attacks against democracy. her favorite thing to remember in the face of these challenges is to look to the past to do better in the future. humans have made many mistakes in the past, and learning from them prevents much pain and suffering. in trying to find the best way forward for an equitable future for all, she tried to be mindful of always trying to do good for others. “in order to do good, we need memory; we need courage; and we need creativity” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week 7). kayle was courageous and creative, and if she would have had more time, she would have worked to create a better world for all. kayle will be dearly missed by all who knew her. in her short life, she tried to live a life well-lived. she reflected on the experiences she had and inspired others around her. she got to know others by asking questions and being mindful of her own skills and limitations. she wanted to explore as much of the world as possible, and she discerned those paths that would give her those possibilities. most importantly, she overcame many obstacles and formed meaningful relationships with those around her. her life defines a life well-lived, despite its short length. we will remember her with the most loving memory. capstone integration 4/29/22 capstone integration the best version of myself i view my responsibilities to others as being kind, respectful, and uplifting. i strive to respond to the suffering of others with compassion and to be of help to others when they need it. i never want to be close-minded toward others, and i will always strive to be joyful and grateful in every aspect of my life ( writing a personal mission statement activity moreau fye week thirteen) as a part of my mission statement, i strive to be someone who can enjoy the present moment. week one’s ted talk, “why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer gave me a moment of reflection in which i realized that i need to allow myself more time to relax and not be so stressed out ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). oftentimes when i am in the present moment, i find myself overthinking about other things instead of enjoying the moment. i have often struggled with allowing myself to be in the moment without overthinking what i should be doing instead, so this ted talk helped me realize how important it is to allow myself to be in the moment. in relation to this goal, in week four of this class, the quote “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” really resonated with me ("navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this quote emphasized to me the importance of living in the moment and being open to new experiences. especially at a place like notre dame with countless opportunities, i have tried my best to make the most of every moment. another aspect of my mission statement is that i strive to be someone that builds everyone around me up and brings joy into my life as well as others. i never want to be someone who is envious of others or brings others down through my negative attitude. as hesburgh said, “we don’t prove anything by burning something down, we prove something by building it up” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). furthermore, in week 3 of this moreau course, we discussed key questions that help to discern whether we are headed in the right direction in life. the questions asked were: “is this a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and gifts—engages all of your abilities—and uses them in the fullest way possible? is this a genuine service to those around you?” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). thinking about these questions made me realize that what i value most about where i end up in life is how much it positively impacts not only me but also those around me. i hope that i use the opportunities that i have been given to help others and make a difference, which we discussed the importance of in week twelve of this course (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 moreau fye week twelve). another aspect of my mission statement is that i strive to be someone that strays away from judgment and treats everyone with kindness and inclusion. in the interview assigned for week 5 of this course, i asked my mom “what do you think i value and desire in life? why?”, https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145911 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145911 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145919 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145929 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145929 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146055 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146055 4/29/22 capstone integration and my mom told me that i value being kind to others and treating others with respect ("week five discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). in week 7 of this moreau course, we were assigned a reading that further emphasized to me the importance of not being judgmental towards others. as written, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart moreau fye week seven). one aspect of my life that has clearly emphasized inclusion is my time spent at notre dame. while at notre dame, the community has been so inclusive and welcoming. in “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame”, inclusion on our campus was highlighted in the diversity and inclusion that notre dame uplifts (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). everyone on our campus is unique in their own way, and we all have something to offer and give to the larger community, therefore inclusiveness is always a priority. i never want to be someone that is close-minded towards others because of differing opinions, so it is important to me to strive to be as open-minded and welcoming as possible. as discussed in week eleven of this course, if we refuse to surround ourselves with people who differ from us in various ways, we will never grow as individuals (“how to avoid an echo chamber” dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). in addition to this, a large part of how i pursue a life well-lived is by trying my best to have a positive outlook on life. in week 6 of this moreau course, i was prompted to reflect on all of the things that i am grateful for in my life. in the article titled “the right way to be introspective”, i learned about ways to self-reflect with a positive mindset and not be so entrapped in negative thoughts. the article talked about how asking yourself “what” questions are more productive than asking yourself “why” questions because “what” questions force us to name our emotions and “why” questions lend themselves more to negative responses in our minds (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” tasha eurich, ted conferences moreau fye week six). in addition to this, i was able to reflect on how i strive to pursue a life well lived through defining a life well-lived in my integration three for this course (integration three moreau fye week eight). in writing this reflection, i was able to clearly organize my thoughts on how i want to live a life that i am proud of. ultimately, my conclusion from reflecting on this topic was that pursuing a life well-lived for me is about impacting others in a positive way and using my abilities to help others. one reading and quote regarding this topic that specifically resonated with me was from an article by professor steve reifenburg. in the article he wrote about his service trip to chile, and discussed how when he arrived in chile, he assumed he was the one helping through his service projects with the kids in the community, when in actuality, the kids ended up helping him and accompanying him just as much.“it is a reciprocal relationship. one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship” wrote professor steve reifenburg (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i really enjoyed steve https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145958 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145958 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145929 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/168041 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/168041 https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145974 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145974 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/146007 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing 4/29/22 capstone integration reifenburg’s outlook that to accompany is to be accompanied. i liked the perspective that helping someone is never a one-sided task, which we often tend to view it as. capstone integration 4/21/22 professor thigpen pursuing a life well-lived personal mission statement: “in my life i have many different and important roles and responsibilities. in my role as a student, i wish to be hardworking, diligent, and confident in my abilities, striving for authentic and good-quality work. i wish to be cooperative and helpful to fellow students, making my role as a student not only about reaching excellence, but also about being a team player. in my role as a daughter to my parents i am to be grateful above all by showing respect and love for all that they have done for me. this must involve not only abiding by their rules, but also going out of my way to show kindness and thankfulness. as an older sister, i am to be a role model to my younger sister by giving her advice. i am also to be a good listener by hearing her out and creating a space where she feels comfortable to talk about her feelings and troubles. i think the key to a healthy friendship is honesty, so in my role as a friend, i wish to be completely truthful, even when it is not easy. i should also be supportive because a friend should always be there to uplift and encourage their friend’s passions. personally, i have to be able to practice self-love because i cannot love others or be good at any of these roles without loving myself first. all my roles and responsibilities are most importantly meant to be acted on with courage and love, and led by my faith in god. this is what will make me a successful student, daughter, sister, and friend.” in the first part of my mission statement, i mention being successful in my role as a student. in order to accomplish this, i have to be able to step away from school work and know when to take a break rather than quit. this is something i have struggled with in my first year in college coming into a heavier workload. as gandhi says, we must take time away from our work and meditate more when we are feeling busy (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). another aspect to being successful in school and the workplace is being able to take risks. i have been worried many times in life about failure; it has always been one of my biggest fears. when being asked the question, “if you knew you couldn’t fail, what might you most like to do?” allowed me to consider the ways in which i could take more risks in my education (“7 clues: an interactive assessment activity”-moreau fye week 4). this question will drive my curiosity to new places by allowing me to join clubs and take classes i wouldn’t have taken for fear of not being successful or not fitting in. the conversation with my mom in week 5, helped me realize that i need to learn to ask for what i want in life (“week five discernement conversation activity”moreau fye week 5). this is central to my role in the workplace and in my education because i need to feel confident in asking people for help. in my mission statement i mention being confident in my abilities, which is something i wish to strive for in my life. in my role as a daughter, i mention how i want to be kind to my parents, like they are kind to me. they are my role models and i wish to emulate what they do for me onto others. in the ted video with pope francis, he says, “the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week 7). i wish to treat others with dignity, even those who don’t treat me with the same respect. in addition, i wish to live out my family life with joy. now in my family life, we always have a good time together and share so many traditions. i wish to share this kind of joy in my family life when i get married and if i have children. the kind of joy received from family is not simply happiness as father micheal describes that joy is the sense of rightness in the way you are living your life, while happiness is more about external factors, like hunger, sleep, and illness (“three key questions”-moreau fye week 3). as an older sister, i wish to be a good listener, which involves being able to empathize with my little sister to understand what she is going through. through the practice of accompaniment, i can truly be with my sister when she is going through something, even if i have not gone through the same thing (“teaching accompaniment”steve reifenberg week 9). with having a sister, it’s easy to get into fights about our differences. it is important that i try to love her in the way that god loves us. i cannot do this without learning to love the things about myself that i don’t love already. i felt that the article in week 10 exemplified this when jacob walsh wrote “but at this time, i’d thought this meant god loved me in spite of me being attracted to men. but i started to see he was using my sexuality to reach me with his love” (“growing up gay and catholic”-jacob walsh week 10). this quote is about loving yourself despite the toxic elements in society that may tell you otherwise. as a friend, i wish to try and understand their opinions on every subject, even when i do not agree. sometimes i can be a confrontational person especially when i feel strongly about a particular topic. as dr. paul blaschko said, “the worry seems to be that as we surround ourselves with people who agree with us, we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid an echo chamber”dr. paul blaschko week 11). it is important to surround myself with people that disagree with me so that i can learn from new perspectives and share my own. part of being an uplifting and supportive friend is knowing when to end an argument and respect someone for their opinion. the most important part of my mission statement is to always act with courage and love. mlk expresses that “men hate each other because they fear each other. they fear each other because they don’t know each other”, which proves that we must go beyond what is expected of us to really get to know others and what they are feeling (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.”-dean j. marcus cole week 12). giving people the benefit of the doubt or trying to communicate with them is key to living a life of love and courage. recycle joy at the end of my life, i want to be remembered by my character and how i helped others. in today’s world, it is hard to find time to discern your path and find your joys in life because it is so fast-paced and focused on achievement. we will all eventually die, most of the things we once idolized not mattering anymore. if we focus on serving others though, we will make a lasting impact that will carry on after we die. a life well-lived for me is one where you focus on being the best person you can be and use your gifts to better serve others. since the world is very achievement oriented, it can be difficult to step away and search for your joys without getting lost in your work. however, it’s very important that we take breaks: “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by iyer – moreau fye week one). iyer promotes spending time alone in stillness without the quickness of the world around us. technology has sped our world up, and this creates problems in our lives. recently, i have been asking myself the question: what life am i living? too often i get caught up in the lightning-fast processing speeds of the world and the technology that is at our fingertips. it’s important for me to take breaks to find what i love and pursue them so i can use them to serve others. i don’t want to live a life where i am constantly working just to keep up. i want to live a balanced life, and one that includes using my talents and my joys for the good of others around me. my value system is very important to me, and i want to be remembered for it when i die. i need to constantly check-in on myself throughout my life so that i can continue to stand firm in my beliefs and values: “remember the roots you grew up with, not lose sight of yourself as you’re presented with the many challenges life has to offer, and keeping a tight grip on your values which can help lead you to the people that will help you be the person you want to be” https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 (“domer dozen” -hillmer – moreau fye week two). michael hillmer lists this as a piece of advice for the young adults learning to navigate life in college and especially after. when watching the film hesburgh, i found fr. hesburgh inspiring because he was confident in his own values of what it meant to live a good life, and no matter the political troubles, he was consistent and courageous in standing up for the basic teachings of catholicism. he never got swept up in the world of politics in the sense that he was advocating for humans and providing a moral perspective rather than picking a side. this is what i want to be known for too, i find it refreshing that someone else finds value in standing firm in their morals instead of trying to sacrifice their values to fit a “side.” to see a figure like fr. hesburgh, take on challenging issues without taking a side and instead being steered by his values is admirable and has inspired me to live a life where i am focused on being the best person i can be. in order to live this life that i want, i need to jump into action. the things that i find joy in doing will not come knock on my door and ask that i start enjoying it. i need to go out and seek it out and look for ways to help others with it: “‘contentment is an obstacle. joy always pushes us forward. it’s an impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open one’s talents even more widely than one had before’” (“three key questions” by himes – moreau fye week three). fr. himes explores the question of what brings you joy because it is the backbone of how we live, or should live, our life. this quote by marianne moore sums it up nicely because joy is what makes us continue to live life. it’s different than just happiness, it comes from deep inside each of us. it’s important for me to ask myself every day what i enjoy because once i find those things, i won’t have to rely on happiness, but on joy. i need to actively find these things and then help others with my talents. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146500 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146508 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146508 i need to constantly be checking-in on myself to make sure that i am on the right path in life, and that i am solid in my values: “it’s important to keep in mind that it’s [career development process] not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow” (“navigating your career journey” -ccd – moreau fye week four). when thinking about a life well-lived, it can be easy to try and put everything in a nice box or start to define with certainty what it means to live one. this quote assures those who think there is one right way that there are actually a multitude of ways of living a life well-lived. everyone faces the ups and downs in life, but never in the same way or at the same time as someone else. you can’t look around and start comparing your journey to another person’s journey because it is unique. that’s why reflecting on yourself is so important because that’s the only journey that matters in how you live your own life. when completing the reflections, i felt like i had a better understanding of what it means to go through the process of discernment to a certain extent. it was hard and required a lot of soul searching, but it is so important if i want to pursue something that will bring me joy. it helped me solidify that i want to live a life where i am remembered for my character. when having the conversation (“week five discernment conversation activity” - moreau fye week five), one of the things that stood out was that i am very driven by my values, and they are my “why” in a lot of what i chose to do. i push myself to be the best i can be at whatever i set my mind to; however, it must align with my values. i also value authenticity from myself and others; it shows that they are solid in their values which i believe is the key to living a life well-lived. when i am in “the zone” is when i am using my gifts and living according to my values. some easy examples are golf and softball for me, but even by just being https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146535 in the presence of family and the people i love, i am relaxed and being myself in a genuine way. to me, traditional values are important to me, especially in our culture today where our values as a society are shifting. i’ve always thought that i have a voice and believe it is important that all views are heard whether they’re popular or not. i am very centered around what is right and wrong which comes from having a solid foundation of values. this sense of justice is a great strength of mine, but it can also be my greatest weakness. it can make it hard to operate in the gray areas in life when i am locked into the black and white. i want to be able to use this strength of mine to serve others and leave a lasting impact on those i will serve. to continue to ask myself takes the right kind of questions; questions that cause me to reflect and grow from that reflection: “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions keeps us curious…why questions trap us in our past; what questions help us create a better future” ( “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by eurich – moreau fye week six). when we ask ourselves why something failed or why we are the way we are as flawed human beings, we will of course get defensive. the key is to ask ourselves what this failure or experience taught us. we can keep living in the same cycle of why’s or we can look to learn and grow which will eventually lead us to the joys in our lives. i have the tendency to overwork myself and self-reflect way too much. this is only hurting me; i need to be able to focus on having a growth mindset and being able to fairly evaluate myself to grow from any mistakes i may have in life. this will ensure that i stay strong in my values. helping others will fulfill us because it is what we are made to do as human beings: “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – week https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146547 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146562 seven). love is important in our lives and infectious when we embrace love as the meaning of life. through love we can find solidarity, and through solidarity we find peace. we need to break down the barriers of judgment that keep humans from embracing each other as brothers and sisters in order to reach solidarity. the one thing that stood out to me was pope francis’ take on hope. it’s not just this word we fling around like “i hope this will happen”, causing the word to lose its true effect. it’s built over time and can be nurtured into something worthwhile. one of my favorite quotes is about kindness, and it talks about how a single kind action is not an isolated event, but rather an event that causes more and more kind actions to happen. it’s like how pope francis describes hope where it is infectious and will cause others to gain hope. all of this to gain solidarity and peace with one another. loving others and building a foundation upon hope and solidarity is what brings people together. being remembered for my character and values is something that i find important. i want to serve others as well and believe that doing it through the things that bring me joy will lead to a truly fulfilling life. moreau fye integration three osborn 1 fye 4 march 2022 a life lived assiduously what is a life well-lived? karleigh lynne osborn was the epitome of living assiduously. throughout her life, she had the hardest time declining any favors asked of her, even when her to-do list was extensive. karleigh said yes to the opportunities that fell into her lap and worked hard to earn the opportunities she had to get after and achieve. as someone who despised boredom and loved constantly having a task at hand, karleigh also understood the importance of taking time to sit still and be present. she recognized that sitting still helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this phenomena became clear to karleigh when she arrived at the university of notre dame, in august of 2021, to begin her undergraduate studies. it was when she hugged her parents goodbye that she realized life really does go by fast and to enjoy each and every moment god gives as a blessing. karleigh grew up dreaming about following in her father’s footsteps and becoming an ob/gyn; however, by the time she got to college, her interests flourished and she decided to pursue a career in business. she felt called to this path because she knew it would cater to her strengths and allow her to contribute to a field that so easily has the power to impact the greater good. karleigh admired prominent figures, like fr. ted hesburgh, during her lifetime. she was inspired by the way hesburgh could talk across differences in an effort to create trust and a mutual understanding (“hesburgh” produced by jerry bara and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). karleigh often asked herself, “does anybody need me to do it?” this question was posed by fr. michael himes and served as a reminder to karleigh to live purposefully (“three key questions” adapted from fr. michael himes moreau fye week three.) she was passionate about giving back and who she gave back to depended on what those around her needed at that present moment in time. it was important to her to live in the moment and “keep death daily before her eyes.” this was how st. benedict instructed his monks to live during the sixth century and although it may seem morbid, it kept karleigh from taking things for granted. osborn 2 karleigh was a woman of many interests. she loved to nanny and was very involved with children throughout her life. running and styling hair were both hobbies she enjoyed on a daily basis and also used to relieve anxiety. she valued engaging in relationships that were personable and would often get coffee or a meal with someone different each week. karleigh knew that she would be able to take these passions with her in life no matter what kind of job she ended up with. she knew that pursuing a career in the business world would not determine the rest of her life (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). it was important to her to keep this nonrestrictive mindset throughout college and let god guide her. karleigh’s dad delivered her in the hospital on may 24, 2003 because her doctor was running behind from playing golf and she was too eager to enter into the world. thankfully, her dad was an ob/gyn. they carried a special bond throughout life and karleigh relied on her dad for advice and constructive criticism when she knew she needed it. her dad knew what was important to her, and something he noticed, despite her limited experience, was how important the church’s teachings on life were to her (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week five). karleigh was a voice for the unborn and was involved in notre dame’s right to life club while in college. throughout life, karleigh was consciously aware of how blessed she was. it was important to her to focus on what she could do for others, and what she had already, instead of what she could not do or what she didn’t have (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). one of the most important lessons she learned in life was to live with joy and gratitude. she knew that if her life was perfect, she would never be able to recognize the blessings in her life. before she went to sleep each night, she would write one thing she was grateful for in her planner from that day. although it was sometimes hard for her to understand the “why” behind some of the suffering god allowed, karleigh was mindful that there was always someone out there with less. this mindfulness and practice of “counting her blessings” kept karleigh from letting the small frustrations in life overwhelm her. one of karleigh’s favorite quotes was from st. teresa of calcutta. “one cannot love, unless it is at their own expense (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven).” karleigh’s hard work ethic in life brought her a lot of success and wealth; however, it was very important to her not to become consumed by this. pope francis wisely mentioned this habit that often befalls people who consider themselves “respectable.” they indulge in the materialistic parts of life and fail to help others. karleigh osborn 3 knew god blessed her life so that she would have the resources to give back. karleigh’s biggest goal in life was to become a better person each day so that one day she could enjoy eternal life with the father in heaven. she knew her life on earth was limited and focused on making a difference in as many lives as she could. to live an assiduous life means to show great care and perseverance in everything you do. karleigh lived an assiduous life. nothing went unnoticed– from the care and patience she showed towards the young children she helped nanny, to the care she showed to her peers and elders. we pray for the repose of her soul, with our father in eternal paradise. peggy hnatusko moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 mission statement: one man can change the world finding a purpose: for me, this semester has been particularly stressful. as the end of freshman year comes to a close and sophomore year approaches, many of those around me have begun to figure out the career paths they want to pursue. unfortunately, the idea of figuring out which direction i want to take in life brings me a great deal of stress. frequently, i remind myself that as long as i follow my passions, i will find success. however, during my management class, i was informed of data which contradicted that statement. my professor showed us a study that showed a lack of correlation between following a passion and finding happiness and/or success in one’s professional life. so, then, how have i been able to find a sense of meaning in my life? below, i will list a few examples of times over the past year that have allowed me to find a sense of purpose in life: family : legacy families at the university of notre dame are very prominent; i am glad to say that i am also a legacy member. not only did my father play football here, but my mother, two aunts, older brother, and twin sister all either went or currently go to notre dame. this past year, after getting in early admission to notre dame, i was sure that i would end up alongside my older brother and cousin. unfortunately, my sister was initially deferred from the university after applying early. however, after re-applying, she was accepted as a regular decision admit. on top of that good news, i also found out that another one of my cousins would be attending holy cross college, which is across the street from notre dame. at notre dame, family is a common theme amongst the student body and alumni network. thankfully, i am blessed not only to be surrounded by my notre dame family, but my immediate family as well. the presence of this community has given me comfort and provided me with the confidence to grow as a person. friends : over the last summer, i was blessed with the opportunity to become very close with my high school friends. during a time of crisis such as the covid-19 pandemic, my friends provided me with a sense of relief from the struggles of reality. whether it be through a beach day in san francisco, or a baseball game at the oakland coliseum, i felt as if each moment i spent with them created a sense of joy. i was once told that “you are the company you keep.” i was thankful to spend the summer with passionate, caring individuals that inspired me to be the best version of myself. travel : fortunately, my older brother’s friends have cars on campus. as avid football fans, we were able to follow the fighting irish football team on almost every one of their games this year. this meant that i was able to see new states i’ve never seen before, including the rolling hills of tennessee, west virginia, kentucky, ohio, and virginia. driving through these parts of the united states gave me the opportunity to realize the vast space that exists in our country. during these drives, i was able to spend a great deal of time looking out the window, reflecting on my life. not only was i able to develop a more worldly perspective, but i grew an even greater appreciation for the beauty of our country. because of my experience driving through the country, whenever i have friends considering traveling through the intercontinental united states, i recommend that they spend a couple extra hours driving, rather than flying. faith : this past summer, i listened to a speech by a princeton professor, in which he encouraged me, along with the crowd of hundreds listening to find our “north star.” recently, i have found that god is my north star. in turn, this has allowed me to come to the realization that notre dame is the perfect place for me. the combination of faith and academics at notre dame gives me the confidence that i will find the vocation that is right for me. ultimately, i believe that i was put onto this earth to use my light from god to inspire others and be a force for good in the world. i believe that if i continue to trust my hard work and keep faith in god, everything will work itself out. recently, i have been thinking about what makes a good human being. in my dorm room, i have my goals posted on my wall, along with sticky notes that give me motivation before i walk out of the door in the morning. this past week, i decided to put a new sticky note on my board that read: “be humble. be kind. and keep faith in god.” although cliché, these words have begun to meet so much to me. i am a strong believer in myself: i believe that with the tools that god has given me, i am blessed with the ability to accomplish anything i want in life. however, despite all the gifts i have been given, i am well aware that this all means nothing if i do not treat others with a sense of love and compassion. additionally, i remind myself that no matter what i achieve, staying grounded and humble is just as important as being kind. so, then, who is the man i want to become? i want to be a man of faith that works to use the opportunities i have as a tool to make a difference in the lives of others. for human beings, it is important to keep in mind that one singular being truly can have an impact on the lives of others. often, people see themselves as hopeless individuals because they do not believe that they have the capacity to make an impact on the world. people get wrapped up in their own bubbles and fail to see the impact they can make on the lives of others. however, people can make an impact on their small circles and their impact on the world can be exponential: if an individual works to make an impact on their community, that impact can be spread from one individual to another, and the world can change a great deal. this impact has the power to develop relationships, create a better world for those living in the present, and to create a better future. ultimately, i believe that my success is defined by my ability to change the world. fortunately, i truly believe that one man can change the world . ultimately, i remind myself of 12 rules to live by: 1. slow down and reflect: everyone has room to grow ( why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one) 2. treat others as you want to be treated ( "hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) 3. you only live once ( "meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three) 4. live as if you know your dreams cannot fail ( "'exploring a life well-lived career development reflection' activity" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/149873 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 5. do not be afraid to take the step that others are unwilling to take ( "week five irishcompass activity" by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week five) 6. make an effort to look on the bright side of things ( "5 minutes" by grotto moreau fye week six) 7. make an effort to make everyone feel welcomed ( "why the only future worth building includes everyone" by ted moreau fye week seven) 8. dream big ( "a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) 9. appreciate the uniqueness that comes with each individual ( "the spirit of inclusion at notre dame" by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week ten) 10. seek to understand and learn ( "passion isn't enough" by hidden brain moreau fye week eleven) 11. act with courage ( "constitutions of the congregation of the holy cross" by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week twelve) 12. believe in yourself, because one man can change the world ( "mission" by the university of notre dame moreau fye week thirteen) https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1z1bztnu9tpjcnuc9idfljslyax0v4xpbwclh_gynkfo/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/modules/items/150006 https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ grace mckenna taylor kelly moreau fye 1 march, 2022 a beginning, a celebration, a love, an eternal life today we are here to honor, remember, and celebrate grace emily mckenna, a daughter, a sister, a twin, a leader, and most importantly a friend to all. she had a charisma for life and wanted everyone to share in it. being quite possibly the most approachable person, not only because of her height, but also her outgoing nature and self-awareness, grace understood the importance of friendships and made it her goal to serve others. growing up in morristown, new jersey, grace was always a mischievous little child. she was never afraid to cause trouble and definitely never afraid to put herself out from the crowd. while her sisters were inside playing tea party, grace was outside exploring the world, most times crawling in mud, climbing trees, sprinting through bushes, and making up enchanted games in her head. she never succumbed to society’s stereotype of the gen z generation of technology and internet sensation, but instead built a pillow out of leaves, tied it to the tree and practiced reflection and mindfulness without even knowing it ("why we need to slow down our lives" by iyer pico–moreau fye week one). it was through this self reflection that we often did not see that helped shape grace’s personality. not only was she always looking on the bright side, but she also knew what she wanted and went after it with everything she had. her mindfulness led her to listen in the silence and understand life’s calls in a way that many people, including her family, could not. we thought it was a rash decision when grace wanted to join rotc or have dreams to become a physical therapist, when in reality she had seen the signs and thought long and hard about her choice. she knew her path in life because she knew who she was, a person dedicated to bringing joy to others, and as a result was able to connect that desire to a career path (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development–moreau fye week 4). what she desired most above all was making other people happy. she often made it a point to tell her family and friends that as long as they were happy, she too was also happy. she lived through others constantly trying to put their needs before hers. for it was through these inner values of service that made her most joyful and as a result led to her purpose in life. she truly lived the words that her grandma had already preached constantly about life, “life is simple if you break it down, so just keep moving step by step and take every moment you have to look around” (reflection to a life well lived–moreau fye week five). in addition, with her outgoing personality, she had a natural ability to bring all different people together. she never had a main friend group but instead talked to everyone she could, trying to make sure everyone was welcomed and loved. often, she looked for those hiding in the shadows and brought them to life, showing them the values of love and friendship that she held onto so tightly. though no one can compare to father hesburgh, grace shared his same strength for building relationships by simply being herself and connecting with people, not for the sake of popularity or building herself up, but for the genuine love of others and human connection (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley–moreau fye week two). however, of course there were times when grace faced many challenges and difficulties. those obstacles led her to lack self confidence and sometimes even doubt herself and decisions. the “why me” questions swept through her because many times her strong effort did not pay off. she was one of the hardest workers i ever knew, always pushing herself to new levels, always believing she could indeed work harder instead of remaining at the bar. it was hard for me to watch her sometimes as she sacrificed so much time and energy to not receive the results she deserved. however, this never stopped grace–a person highly motivated and disciplined. instead, she “turned the why questions into what questions” in order to continue moving forward in her purpose (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way by tasha eurich–moreau fye week 6). questions like what can i still do, what can i do to improve myself, what don’t i understand, what kind of person am i, all shaped grace’s mindset to overcome those obstacles. she would find another way, another solution. with this new growth mindset, she became a more self-sufficient and hard working person. however, because of the many and important connections she built through the years, she knew she was never alone even when her mind tried to make her believe it so. rather, she was more grateful during the low moments in her life because of the relationships that supported her, as she supported them in return. the importance of these friendships helped her find hope and stay motivated to keep moving forward—something that she reminds all people to do as well. like pope francis explained, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis–moreau fye week 7). grace fully embodied this message everyday—bringing people together through happiness. and so today, we remember the beautiful death of a beautiful person. like sr. theresa aletheia believes in “remembering your death,” or “memento mori,” grace was a person that lived her life everyday to the fullest. she loved the thrill, loved the risk, and understood that every single day is a day one might not wake up, and so if you do get another chance to begin a new day, smile and make it count (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die by ruth graham–moreau fye week three). whether grace was competing with her team, laughing with her sisters, spontaneously surprising her friends, easily entertaining herself and others, sharing funny stories whenever she could, or challenging those around her, she was always bringing the best out of people. we will miss her iconic smirk, her small but mighty personality, her tight, sometimes too tight, hugs, but most importantly the genuine joy and love she constantly brought to all of us. i know up there somewhere she will be guiding us and screaming to every notre dame football game. i hope to continue to share her optimism to the world and keep smiling like i know she would. grace has led a life of success, maybe not for her grand accomplishments, but for bringing a new perspective to life that not many people have. one of service, true joy, and reflection. one that will be remembered forever. professor pruitt moreau fye 23 february 2022 my eulogy i am peacefully reminiscing about my time on earth from a comfortable rocking chair in a serene, otherworldly location. i carry wisdom from 90 years of successes, failures, discoveries, and joyous moments. now that my life has come to an end, i have had ample time to reflect on my experiences, and want to share them with my loved ones. i pick up a piece of paper and pen, and write my eulogy, addressing it to my great-granddaughter – who i was never able to meet. dear jane, i want to share with you some of the lessons i have learned in college and the rest of my life now that you are headed off to your first semester at notre dame. you must keep in mind how you want to be remembered after you pass, and what impact you want to have on others. first, there is beauty in taking a step back to practice self-reflection. to live a fulfilling life, you must be wary of unnecessary interruptions, as they ultimately take away from cherished moments. being in constant communication with friends in the college environment can often accelerate our stress – and make us feel like we’re never fully caught up with our lives (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i often found myself distracted from work, which led to an accumulation of assignments. however, once i made the shift to prioritize and separate work and social time, i was able to achieve a balance. next, you must remember to appreciate each step of the journey – “the concept [memento mori] is to intentionally think about our own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future”(“meet the nun…” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). in my experience at notre dame, i learned to ask myself questions about my personal strengths, and remain in tune with what truly brings me joy. this allowed me to discover my academic passion for medicine. the concept of memento mori reminded me to truly experience every moment, whether it be a trip to the grotto, or a rainy day walk around st. mary’s. i hope you cherish each of your moments with an awareness that they are finite and that you ask yourself what legacy you want to leave behind. introspection and mindfulness are so vital in this process as well. once i learned the right way to be introspective, i was able to overcome challenges with less suffering. the “what not why” approach to dealing with emotions will guide you through many challenges – instead of asking yourself why things are happening to you, shift the question to ask yourself what you can do to create a better situation for yourself (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich – week 6). i used this concept often when taking organic chemistry. instead of complaining over why i was struggling so much on assignments, i began to focus on what i could do to improve. this small change helped me perform better on tests, and later on in life when i faced challenges in my relationships and career. when walking through life, it is important to define the values you want to carry with you to ensure that you are living a life well-lived, and fulfilling all of your goals and passions. having someone or something that inspires you is so important in driving you forward. when i took moreau, we looked at success stories of previous notre dame graduates, and i was able to see all of the amazing things they did with their educations, and the relationships they established here. one story that particularly stood out to me was claire conley’s. she integrated her strong faith into her professional career, which consisted of research in oncology with notre dame professor thomas merluzzi (“domer dozen”, claire conley – week 2). this account inspired me to get involved in clubs such as fighting together, where we help comfort children with cancer. and, through this, i became more aware of the valuable lessons i could draw from my mentors. on a similar note, it is important to explore all of your passions and utilize notre dame’s many resources to find a career that speaks to you. remember that “...the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey”, meruelo family center for career development– week 4). you must go out and experience life to find your passions– this process will take trial and error. you will take classes you don’t enjoy, and go to meetings that you wish you could leave early, but all of these experiences forward your understanding of what your true calling is. during my time in college, i explored different fields in science and business, and after years of taking different courses, and many meetings with my advisor later, i found my calling in medicine and public health. lastly, it is so easy to get caught up in the minute details of our lives. sometimes we have to take a step back and evaluate where we stand. an important practice in discerning if we are on the right track to leading a well-lived life is to involve our loved ones in our journies. during my freshman year at notre dame, i had a conversation with my mother about her interpretation of my greatest values, desires, and passions and what she considers to be my strengths (discernment conversation activity – week 5). in this conversation, she helped me see that my true calling was in a combination of medicine and public health, as i am very passionate about helping others and combatting the many structural social justice concerns in healthcare. this was one of many conversations i had in my life with loved ones that allowed me to observe where i stand and how i want to move forward. furthermore, i urge you to cultivate relationships with people outside your immediate sphere of interaction. the relationships we create are arguably the most critical aspect of a life well-lived, and we gain so much from each other’s perspectives. “​​...we all need to see that we are in each other’s “jurisdictions,” spheres of acceptance…and yet, there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude”(fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart, pg 130 – week 7). we need to break down these barriers, and never discount anyone as a potential friend – all of the small, unlikely relationships in life play such a central role in our personal development, and ability to live a life well-lived. in college, i made an effort to make friends in all of my classes, even if our relationship only developed to the extent of walking to class together. after college, i moved to a new city and met so many people that became my community. all of these relationships were so enriching in their own unique ways, and i want you to experience the beauty of interconnectedness throughout your life. enjoy your first semester. with love, anne ritter macy mrs. finan moreau fye 21 april 2022 capstone integration when creating my mission statement, i felt like it was extremely easy. my goals have been the same goals i have been telling myself to do since i was younger. be a good person. help others. become rich and use the money to give back to the poor. i have been telling myself these things my whole life, but i feel like i never really understood what they meant. and to be quite honest, i’m still not really sure what they mean. and my definitions of them could totally change in 10, 20, or even 50 years. but the thing is, i am okay with that. this moreau class has helped me take a deeper look into what each of those statements means to me right now. i have also realized that i don’t have to know what these are going to mean to me in the future. all that matters is how i can use the knowledge and experiences i have now to live a good life. while i wholeheartedly recognize the importance of giving and serving others, this semester has made me realize that i cannot do that without first taking care of myself. pico iyer says, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (week 1). there have been times this semester where i would be enouraged by my friends to hang out, even when i feel terrible and my social battery is running extremely low. i would end up waking up the next few days feeling even worse. i have learned that taking a step back, resting, meditating, and simply taking some alone time allows me to be more present with the people i am with. because i am more present, i develop deeper connections with my friends rather than feeling drained around them. something i would add to my mission statement is putting time aside to check on my mental health so that i can go out and radiate happiness. as psychologist anthony grant says, “people who possess greater insightwhich he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselvesenjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (week 6). if i can radiate happiness, that adds another level to my mission of giving to others, for i am doing it with joy. being a good person isn’t just something that happens overnight. it is a constant effort, something that takes the courage to act every day. as father michael himes says, “two key virtues are crucial to give oneself away: wisdom and courage. wisdom is more than knowledge, and wisdom preeminently knows that the other is other” (week 3). wisdom is developed through experiences, and i feel that as time goes on, i can learn how to serve others even better than i know now. when i was younger, i would always find things i wanted to do for others, but would forget to act on it. i need to hold myself accountable when helping others, using every day as an opportunity to help someone else in a minor way. pope francis says, “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (week 7). professor reifenberg says something extremely similar saying “accompaniment inverts the impulse of “how do we help them?” into an assertion—“we’re in this together”(week 9). the biggest step for me is finding the courage to help others rather than letting each day pass by. recognizing that they are just humans trying to make the most out of their lives, just like me, has made it a lot easier to approach new scenarios and put myself out there. coming to a school like notre dame is special. it is not simply a higher education built to produce the wealthiest and most educated people on the planet. a part of notre dame’s mission statement says, “the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice” (week 10). it is a place that inserts love, faith, and giving into its teachings, while also providing an incredible education where students can thrive. i can honestly say that coming here has changed some of the goals i had originally focused on, and my experiences have helped me discover the values that are most important to me. the merulo family center for career development says, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” (week 4). i used to have this strict blueprint of how i wanted my life to go. i would go to a good college and get my degree, then get a good job where i would make a lot of money, get married, buy a big house, live a happy life. but the truth is i have no control over any of that. while i won’t be able to control how much money i have in the future, i can control how i want to make a difference. and it doesn’t have to be some crazy change that influences thousands. the little things i do right now will contribute to my overall impact, and if i can influence the lives of just a few people in a positive way, i feel certain that will give me more joy than any fancy car or extravagant house would. my experiences here have made me realize what i value most in other peopleand how i want to reflect those values in everything i do. my core values are trust, honesty, and sincerity. i want to be someone that people can rely on, someone people can come to for advice and be vulnerable with. this school has made me realize my core values are what will lead me in the direction god wants me to go. i truly discovered this after talking with my friends for the week 5 moreau assignment. hearing how they felt about me made me realize what aspects of myself i wanted to keep, and what aspects of myself i wanted to improve. the congregation of the holy cross says, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses” (week 12). in order to discover my biggest weaknesses, i need to put myself out of my comfort zone, and surround myself with new experiences and new people where i can grow and learn from different perspectives (week 11). i enjoy putting myself in uncomfortable situations, but determining my weaknesses in new scenarios is sometimes hard for me. by keeping my core values at heart and uncovering my weaknesses, i will slowly develop the wisdom i need to live a fulfilling life. i know that i am not going to have a perfect life. as a kid, i used to dream about a future where everything was just the way i wanted it to be. but the hard truth is that life does not go the way you want it. i am going to struggle. a lot. but as father hesburg says, “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (week 2). my failures are what will make my successes valuable, for if everything comes easy, what is the point in trying? a good life will be filled with bad experiences. i am not going to let those bad things determine who i am as an individual, nor will i let them stop me from living a good life. although my perspectives may change in the future, acknowledging what my mission statement is now will set me up to live a good, honest, and fulfilling life. integration three niuafe 2/26/22 integration three brothers, sisters, tokos, first and foremost i would like to personally thank each and every one of you for coming out after this tragedy. i know it hasn’t been easy losing such a humbled, family man, but the lord has now called him home. thank you to those that have donated to the family inaction of good faith and those that have set up a gofundme for the humblest of them all, niuafe . as we all know, tuihalamaka was greatly dedicated and ambitious when pertaining to his sport. this was a man that was willing to run through a brick wall to see himself and his family succeed. not only was he a beast on the field but also in the classroom. a man who would take studying over partying and friday night. notre dame university was a school with the highest support system any young adult could ask for, according to niuafe. as one of niuafe’s closest friends, i could definitely say he fulfil his purpose as much as possible in life. as a teenage boy, he was aware that he had business to take care of in order to start a great legacy behind his last night. he was infact forced to find the best ways to reaching his goals in live. regardless if it meant him changing schools or traveling distance everyday to maintain a steady routine in leading to where he was now. as quoted, “the one thing technology doesn’t provide use with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology.” https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ (pico lyer, ted). i use this quote to really explain that technology has a way with being deeply in ones life each and every day. if we didn’t adapt, time doesn’t wait for anyone, we’d be left behind. football was on the top of the chart, but not the only thing niuafe cared about. he’d go and support others while attending the university of notre dame. he was also one that cared tremendously about the disabled and those in need. niuafe wasn’t really a person to call on people for help but he https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ always knew the close people he could depend on. as mentioned, “no matter how hard my training became, she was there for me.” https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500 c9ecd9 (produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley). not only did this quote explain that everyone needs someone but also that everyone has stressful times and it is up to those around to try to comfort them as much as possible. those that hung out with niuafe know that he was one that could definitely eat. if he had to chose, seafood would be the “go to” food to eat. nobody really knows when there day is called and they must meet the lord. some are more scared than others but when you walk with the lord daily, it doesn’t scare you anymore. stated here, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness.” https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html (ruth graham, ny times). death isn’t something we can outrun nor hide from because it is just a part of life. whenever niuafe had extra time on his hands, he’d often surround himself with his family and/or the church. after knowning him for we could say his whole life, i personally know that this was a man who was dedicated to giving back. regardless if it was to his family and inner circle, volunteering, to even giving a few dollars to those on the corners in need. when talking about niuafe junior, there wasn’t much to say his sense of humor and personality speak for themselves. he was the kind of person who could light up a whole room by just his presence. he wouldn’t say much, but when he did, people listened. i’ve had the luxury of actually growing up with junior and the overall development he has reached as a person himself was greatly above par. as quoted, “there is no “best major” out therebut there is a “best major for you”. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ (meruelo family center for https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ career development). i used this quote because this wasn’t a picky guy but he used whatever worked for him. only a few really knew niuafe when he went by junior and the mentality has turned completely from boy to man. i believe this was a part when niuafe began to learn himself and step completely into his role god put him here to do. knowing right from wrong and understanding the way people moved was something his parents really installed into him. allowing him to make his own judgements because he was aware. niuafe received many awards and accomplishments but these weren’t what he built himself on. he lived his life in a very godly way and carried his faith on his shoulder. as stated, “lord, i don’t even know if you really exist, i don’t even know that all the stories that are recorded in the bible are true or not, but, if you can still do something about my situation, if you can still do something for me, please help me. please help me.” https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ (aria swarr, grotto). this quote helps us understand that regardless of whether we know or not, it’s better to be safe than sorry. any and every time we are mentioning niuafe in our conversations, it will be nothing but good things. people tend to lean towards words such as warm-hearted, hard worker, good-looking, or even just as smooth. this was a person who believed we should all help one another. as stated, “that we all need each other, none of us is an island.” https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_ev eryone/transcript (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences). a person that is willing to do their best to try to pull everyone together will always be good in god’s eyes because that’s all he wants for the common good. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration dot crumlish alison thigpen moreau first year experience capstone integration 29 april 2022 the capstone of the arch that holds the bridge to a life well-lived: love for our final week of moreau, we had to write our own personal mission statement. i found this a very interesting assignment, but it allowed me time to reflect on what i think contributes to a life well-lived, specifically in relation to my own life. the mission statement that i wrote is the following: “it has always been my dream to design something that helps people in life. i will strive to learn as much as i can from others, my academics, and my experiences, because, through learning, i will be able to expand my knowledge and open myself to new opportunities and perspectives. constantly striving to understand humanity from more than a single point of view will allow me to empathize with others' struggles and help in the best way i can, as well as be a person that brings others together, rather than dividing them. the close relationships i form with others will be meaningful ones that push me to be a better person, while also being rooted in kindness and love. i will not define my success in life by the physical things in my life, whether good or bad, from the grades i receive to the amount of money and things i have. rather, i will define my success in life by the positive impact i have on the world, however big or small it is, as long as i do my best. the highest good in life is love, god’s love to be precise, and i want to help show others that love.” (personal mission statement moreau first year experience week 13). as i look forward to the next three years, it is very easy to get overwhelmed with all of the different decisions that i will have to make and all the experiences i will have. but, when approaching the next three years, i need to keep in mind my ‘mission statement’, and how i can steer my life in a direction that when i look back upon it, i will consider a life well-lived. like i state in my mission statement, i want to create things that help people. for me, the first step in that journey over the next three years is to pick a major in which i will gain the most knowledge that will help me to achieve this, and like talked about in class, “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” (navigating your career journey by nd moreau first year experience week 4). right now, i am currently on the path to be a mechanical engineer. my biggest struggle with this decision, though, is not being able to other things too, and learn things from other perspectives. that is why i am considering doing a dual degree program with the college of arts and letters, specifically a degree in industrial design. when you are creating something, there are always two sides: the actual function of the thing and how it works properly, and then how the user interacts with it and relates to it. i do not want to shut myself off to just the function of an invention with an engineering degree, or closing myself in a bubble. “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating university of opinion” (how to avoid an echo chamber moreau first year experience week 11). i thought this was a really concise and interesting way of saying what is wrong with bubbles in society today. they become echo chambers that only reiterate the same ideas and don’t explore new or different ones. like i learned in one of my engineering classes, this is something that can shine through in brainstorming sessions, as people like to shut ideas down immediately without exploring them https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143990 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143990 more, because they seem infeasible initially. but, some of these ideas turn out to be the best ones. just like that, i want to understand the industrial design side as well. understanding people and the world from multiple perspectives is really important to living a life well-lived. one way we can learn to do this is through accompaniment. like we talked about in class, “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (teaching accompaniment moreau first year experience week 9). i thought this quote was really interesting. i think a lot of us feel bad or guilty having others assist us, or accompany us, and feel like a bother. but in reality, we cannot accompany others ourselves if we are not open to accompaniment. we need to embrace humility and be open to hearing others and their advice, and taking their help when we need it, especially when we strive to be able to accompany others. this is something that can be really hard to do, especially in college. it’s really easy to get caught up in college and feel like just a person in the crowd, and feel like no one really knows you or cares about you genuinely, especially away from your family. “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” (growing up gay and catholic moreau first year experience week 10). i think this is a way of thinking that a lot of people fall victim to, especially in college. when you compare yourself to others who are loved, but you know you are very different from them, it’s very easy to convince yourself that you just are incapable of being loved. this mindset can easily develop into an intense loneliness, and a feeling of being isolated. pope francis discussed this in his ted https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143949 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 talk, explaining how in our society today it is very easy to become like islands (pope francis ted talk moreau first year experience week 7). how can we overcome this struggle, though, and embrace ourselves and each other, and embark on a path towards a life well-lived? just like with accompaniment, the solution has to be to look within ourselves. “asking what could keep us open to discovering new information about ourselves, even if that information is negative or in conflict with our existing beliefs” (‘the right way to be introspective’ by tasha eurich moreau first year experience week 6). part of living a life well-lived is learning to know yourself, and facing inner conflict. we can only live our best lives when we are our best selves, and we only can be our best selves when we are open to learning about ourselves. there are many divisions in the world, but in reality, all anyone wants is to be loved. to me, the biggest thing at the core of living a life well-lived is love: loving others, and loving who you are, the good and the bad. even when there are things are people we dislike, we cannot close ourselves off and jump to conclusions. “each one of us can choose to finally end hate, by ending this separation. we must do something. this is something each one of us can do.” i thought this quote from dean marcus cole was really powerful. even if hatred and injustice seem like such huge problems that individually we feel like we cannot solve, in reality, it is a matter of each of us resolving that issue in our own lives, closing the separation between us and others, that will solve the problem as a whole. if we each do our part to end hatred, we can overall. this reminded me specifically of a situation at my engineering job. a new intern was hired about a month ago, and he has been sort of demeaning to me and acting like he knows more than me even though i’ve worked there for near a year. at first, i was very upset and hurt, and wanted nothing to do with him, but then i talked to my best friend and listened to his problems at school, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ not even having mentioned my own situation. and one thing he told me was, “i can never truly hate or dislike someone. even if i think i hate them at first, they always end up growing on me, because i learn more of who they are and how they think, and i learn to love them for it.” i think learning to love the people who are different from us is one of the most beautiful parts of life, like a broken vase being glued back together, and i think now more than ever, it is important. since my friend told me this, i’ve been talking to my coworker more, and really learning to appreciate him. overall, i hope my mission statement will help guide me through the next three years. i want to help people in life, and live a life well-lived. i think the biggest part in doing that is loving everyone, and showing god’s love to the world. i’d like to do this in every part of my life, and i think the next three years will allow me to live this out in my own unique way, learning the skills and information needed to create things that help people. “whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living” (father hesburg movie moreau first year experience week 2). even though it might be a lot of work the next few years, i genuinely strive to live a life well-lived, and i think there are a lot of things in the next few years that i can do to help move forward in that direction. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 capstone integration 1 moreau integration 27 april 2022 discerning the man in the mirror living a life well-lived will turn out differently for everyone. for father hesburgh, his path was different from the one of mother teresa, or malcolm x. everyone has different paths for how their lives can be well-lived, and ’s path is especially different. is a man who analyzes everything in his life. his mission statement reflects this point and says, “i am a strong dependable man. i have people depending on me to succeed, and so i will develop my character mentally and physically as much as i can. i am responsible for my actions, but the consequences do not only affect me. i will focus on the goal at hand, and ensure only positivity is surrounding me.” (“mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen) tyson has believed in his mission from the beginning. even when discussing the importance of “slowing down your life” tyson resonated with the words of mahatma gandi as he talked about the importance of not letting outside influences take away time from yourself. mahatma gandi once said, “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour. i’ll have to meditate for two.” (“why we need to slow down our lives " by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one) once tyson saw these words he finally realized the importance of self-care, not only physically but most importantly mentally. gandi wasn’t the only person who influenced tyson with his words and actions, though. 2 seeing how father hesburgh lived his life really opened the eyes of tyson throughout the year. seeing him interact with all types of world leaders from martin luther king to the pope really made tyson realize that anyone can have an impact on people’s lives if they have the right mindset. some words that really resonated with him were father hesburgh’s quote about suffering. hesburgh says, “in my faith, you learn there’s meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to, first, suffer yourself.” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week two) from this tyson understood the importance of everyone having to sacrifice something in order to achieve a life well-lived. although you can only sacrifice so much before time is up, you have to capitalize on the time that is given to you. “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time,” sister aletheia said. ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die " by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three) because of the limited time that we have to capitalize on, we have to plan accordingly. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip.” (“navigating your career” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) one thing that tyson plans to do in order to achieve a life well-lived is to open his own non-for-profit organization dedicated to helping inner-city children achieve an equal level of education that more privileged children have. in order to truly accept that people in this world are very different with different opportunities, tyson had to realize some things he had never thought about before. “people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance, and happiness.” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich, ted conferences moreau fye week six) in order to realize 3 that there were people in need, tyson had to learn to look inside himself and see that he had been given a greater opportunity throughout his life than most kids. while there is nothing one can do about a situation they have been born into, once you realize that you are different you must make it a mission to help those who are not as fortunate. tyson realized that this is not only the moral thing to do, but it is what keeps the world moving forward with hope. pope francais once said, “hope is the door that opens onto the future.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven) this quote is impactful because it helps everyone understand that we must have compassion for those who are oppressed or not as fortunate in the world. “compassion is not only to suffer for the other, but it is also to be in sympathy with another.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg) moreau fye week nine) the next key to living a life well-lived is truly being yourself. you cannot be happy and succeed in life without staying true to who you are. “you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh, grotto moreau fye week ten) this quote carries weight throughout the life of because he has vowed to be true to himself and not let anyone run him off of his track. this is the reason tyson ford has been as successful as he has so far in his life. sometimes throughout this life people find it difficult to be themselves, especially when being themselves brings on hate from other people for no particular reason. a question asked by states, “how will we know when the world is free of prejudice?” (“week 12 qqc question” by moreau fye week twelve) the answer to this question is one that we might not ever find out, but regardless 4 of the odds against , he will stay true to himself and not let others bring him down with negativity. murphy 1 taylor kelly moreau 5 march 2022 achieving eternal life through life and death i never thought the day would come that i would be standing here at our beloved madeline’s funeral reciting her eulogy. i am honored to be with you today celebrating the life and death of our sister in christ. may she rest in peace. it is impossible to encompass madeline’s life in a short speech, partly because her breadth of impact was so wide. she touched so many lives. i can confidently say i would not be the person i am today without her example and advice. i know she would be mortified if she were sitting here listening to me talk about her like this. her cheeks would turn bright red, and she would again say what she always says when people compliment her: “oh thank you! but it’s all thanks to god.” which leads me to my first point about madeline; when you looked at her, you saw christ reflected in her. she attended a retreat in college, and on this retreat, one of the speakers said, “the more you know christ, the more you take him into your heart. sooner or later, there will be so much of him in your heart that he just spills out for the whole world to see.” madeline recognized christ spilling out of the sister who said this, and she wanted nothing more than to have christ spill out of her, so she took this advice to heart, and cultivated a deep relationship with him. she was very introspective in the right way. (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich phdweek 6) she took time to reflect on her days in the chapel, and she often journaled her thoughts in her prayer journal. she had many worries and concerns, but she never dwelled on them. instead, she took time to listen to the lord. when she couldn’t clearly hear him, she https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ murphy 2 simply prayed, “jesus, i surrender myself to you, take care of everything.” this rendered her completely surrendered to christ. she was like a tabernacle. she often expressed receiving the eucharist and being so thrilled to be holding jesus in her mouth that she could not stifle her grin. she was truly a friend of christ, and he poured out of her. perhaps the people this touched the most were her students. madeline was the oldest of 12 children, so it was no surprise when she decided to become a teacher. she eloquently taught her students math, english, and music, but they gleaned the most important lessons from her demeanor. she fervently cared about each one of them, and they always knew they could turn to her for advice or a listening ear. no matter what time or how much work she had, she was always available for her students, and they knew they could come to her with anything (hesburg filmweek 2). she was someone whom it was easy to be vulnerable with, probably because she was trusting of and vulnerable with others. she was unafraid to seek out conversations with those who may help her (discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity week 5), and she was always willing to be a help to another. she knew outside opinions and advice from those whom she loved were priceless. part of the reason she sought so much advice from others was because she was a prudent decision maker. she diligently made plans, but she was sure to be flexible, as she knew plans are often disrupted (navigating your career journey -week 4). in college, she used to plan her day out minute-by-minute. every second of it was full. it was not until she learned to take a deep breath and slow down her day, that she found true peace (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau week 1). as a child, she was a voracious reader. her peers and teachers would say she was never caught without a book in her hand. in high school and the beginning of college, this practice ceased because her days were so fast paced. luckily, she https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ murphy 3 decided to reinstate it. she read as a form of relaxation, and she added other times of peace and reflection into her life. taking time to slow down her life was a wonderful example for everyone around her. she was more productive than prior, and i know she would encourage everyone to rest—particularly on sundays. her life was definitely not all rest, though. when she wasn’t mentoring and teaching children at school, she spent time fighting for the lives of unborn children. she believed the only future worth building includes everyone—no matter how small (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francisweek 7). she firmly believed that a person’s dignity is not dependent on whether they are wanted—every life is worth living. since she knew every life is worth living, she lived her life to the fullest. she was particularly ready for her death—even though we all weren’t—because she lived every day as if it was her last (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth grahamweek 3). she frequented the sacraments and prayed multiple times a day to prepare her heart for her final hours, and she tried her best to live out christ’s commands. though she sometimes stumbled, she always got back up. she was a wonderful friend, teacher, mother, sister, and daughter. her example is admirable. may we all strive to be more like her. thank you. reflection i actually really liked this moreau activity. it helped me reflect on why i am here: to get to heaven and help bring as many people as possible with me. do i seriously view myself in the way the narrator of my eulogy does? absolutely not. but do i aspire to be like that? yes. this was, in a way, setting goals for myself. it is especially relevant in lent and discernment, as i embark on this journey of self-improvement with christ. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html murphy 4 integration 3 moreau fye march 4, 2022 to be determined1 a “life well-lived” is hard to define because everyone has a different opinion on what life should be. it is currently common practice in society to focus on material accomplishments and to live a “go! go! go!” lifestyle where you are constantly working toward something society wants you to achieve. however, it is becoming increasingly clear that life is more meaningful when you can take the time to slow down and make life what you want it to be. i believe that a key step for me in living a “life-well lived” is taking the time to experience the world as it is presented to me and to evaluate what i would like to make happen out of the opportunities i have been given, as well as spending time with those around me. although there are many valuable things in life, time is the one thing that trumps all else. nothing in life can be appreciated without the time to reflect on and develop it. as i have grown up, the plan for my life was always to achieve good grades to be accepted into a good college to get a good job. pressure from society, my parents, and myself forced me into the fast-paced lifestyle that many people find themselves in. i came to believe – not in my heart but in my actions – that school mattered most in life, and i spent the majority of my time in high school stressing about – though not necessarily improving – my performance in school. i was, and still am, constantly overwhelmed with the idea that i am running out of time to make my life what i want it to be. 1 i chose “to be determined” as my title because an important part of living a “life well-lived” is understanding that you cannot be sure of the future – that the future has yet to be determined – so it is important to focus on what matters to you and those around you in the present. in week one of moreau this semester, we reflected on our first semester at notre dame, and i was made aware of this constant time pressure i feel. “the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating that ‘stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). so many people are stuck in a constant cycle of stressing about what they need to accomplish that they do not take the time to understand why they want to accomplish those things. after learning this, i believe that the best way to know if you are living a “life well-lived” is to understand what your true beliefs are and to integrate them into your life. material accomplishments matter so much more when you truly resonate with why you worked toward them. as the center for career development stated, “it is imperative to take time after an experience or conversation to think intentionally about how it impacted you and how it aligns with your [values, interests, personality, and skills]” (“navigating your career journey” by the center for career development – moreau fye week four). for example, one of my biggest life accomplishments so far is being named a notre dame stamps scholar. on the surface, this was an incredible achievement because it made it so much easier to attend a good college, and it meant that i had succeeded at my high school goal. however, when reflecting on my values, it becomes clear how much more this accomplishment means. i think that one of the reasons i was named a stamps scholar is because of a project i did in summer 2020 where i studied the effects of covid-19 on women-owned businesses in hawaii. i interviewed lots of female business owners on their experiences, and it was such an eye-opening experience to have conversations with members of my community. in addition to learning from them, i learned how happy they were just to have someone who wanted to hear their story, and i realized how much i value that sense of sharing ideas and stories within a community. because this stamps scholarship stemmed from me https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ engaging in a project i really value, it is an even bigger accomplishment. i believe that when you understand what you value in life, your achievements, no matter the size, contribute greatly to a “life well-lived.” another key aspect of the importance of time is deciding what to spend your time on. in week seven, we focused on relationships, something people do not always take the time to develop. (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). i learned the importance of relationships and sharing ideas through the summer project i previously described, but relationships are something that i have always put tons of effort into developing. i have been shy my entire life, and with anxiety on top of that, talking to people has always been a struggle for me. because of this, my parents and teachers have always made it clear that i would need to learn to speak to people to succeed. i have spent time on learning how to communicate with people throughout my entire life, and i have realized that it is important to spend the same amount of time building strong relationships with others so you can learn and grow from them. i have also realized that as a freshman in college, i cannot possibly know exactly where my life is headed. i may know what i am currently focused on, but the only thing i can be sure of is the present, not the future. this idea enhances the importance of building meaningful relationships in the present. i may not know where i will end up, but i do know the people who are around me now, and by learning from my experiences with them, i can understand more about myself and where i want to end up, contributing to me living a “life well-lived.” i think that the most important aspect of a “life well-lived” is spending time focusing on those around you. week three focused on death, which is a really hard topic for me to talk about. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). the most life-changing event i have dealt with was losing one of my best friends https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html in the whole world in november 2021. while i still cannot wrap my head around the details of his death, i also cannot believe how much time with him i lost that i always thought i would have. we had big plans for world changing projects that i will now have to do in his memory instead. a “life well-lived” cannot focus on the future because it will completely miss the present. you cannot ever be sure of what life will bring you, so you have to enjoy what you have. the time aspect itself of life is not a guarantee, but the relationships you currently have and can continue to start and develop are certain, which makes them the most important part of a “life well-lived.” i believe that a “life well-lived” cannot be strictly defined because life is so unpredictable. overall, the best way to ensure your life is everything it could be is to take the time to understand your own values, keep these values in mind as you live and accomplish things, and to build and maintain relationships as you go because you can never be sure of what a relationship will turn into. his path to happiness saint paul said to the thessalonians, “brothers and sisters, we do not want you to be uninformed about those who sleep in death, so that you do not grieve like the rest of mankind, who have no hope. for we believe that jesus died and rose again, and so we believe that god will bring with jesus those who have fallen asleep in him” (1 thessalonians 4:13-14). so today, with heartfelt smiles, let’s celebrate sam’s life – a life well-lived. one of the resounding messages sam’s parents continuously received throughout the years at parent-teacher conferences was that their son had a good and solid moral compass. similar to theodore hesburgh ("hesburgh" by jerry barca moreau fye week two), sam refused to allow the secular world to dictate what he should accept as truths, how he should think, and how he should behave. being a faithful catholic in a private, liberal high school was not an easy journey for sam. as one of a handful of practicing christians at his school, living his faith sometimes involved making sacrifices and putting himself in uncomfortable positions. he declined party invitations because he knew they weren't the type of celebration where he would want to be. it was not fun sitting home some friday nights, but he knew he had made the right decision. every ash wednesday he went to church before school so he could wear his ashes all day. whenever kids asked him why he had them on his forehead, he faithfully answered, “they’re there to remind me that i’m a sinner and that i need to repent." sam had a knack for working well with people that didn't share the same beliefs as he did. as theodore hesburgh once said, "we may have had our disagreements but at the end of the day we were all fishermen" ("hesburgh" by jerry barca moreau fye week two). sam recognized the importance of respecting these differing views and always listened to the opposing sides' stance. he understood that growth often comes from having your own beliefs challenged, so he often purposefully put himself in a group that presented diverse ideas. sometimes he emerged with a changed outlook on his beliefs and other times he left feeling more convicted in his original thoughts. yet, at the end of the day, sam always lived out the truth that we are all created in the image of god, which means we all have intrinsic value. as an engineer with a love of group projects, sam exemplified this core belief in the classroom on a daily basis. he enjoyed listening to everyone’s diverse ideas and helping to identify the critical elements of value within all contributions. in addition to respecting and listening to everyone's ideas, sam was a loyal friend who was always there to lift a friend’s spirit when they were down. with his calm and empathetic nature and his ability to be a really good listener, sam became the person to go to in his friend group whenever anyone needed difficult life advice, emotional support, or just an ear to talk to. as pope francis mentioned in his virtual ted talk ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week seven), we all need each other to get through our daily lives. to maintain each other’s happiness, we must help each other out when others are at their lows even if it is at our own expense. this is exactly what sam did. it didn't matter if he had tons of homework due the next day, he still found the time to comfort those of https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript his friends who were struggling. on one occasion, he spent two hours on the phone with a close friend the night before an ap exam, giving her support, encouragement, and a place to share her fears on the first night she was hospitalized for a mental health issue. sam was also there to assist others with more practical problems too especially if it involved his engineering talents. his parents noted that what he ultimately desired in life was to be happy (discernment conversation with parents moreau fye week five). sam knew that he achieved this happiness by working on engineering projects around the house, like his model train village he designed and built during the covid-19 pandemic. yet this joy was most fulfilled when his work involved helping others ("navigating your career journey" by moreau center of career development moreau fye week four). he thoroughly enjoyed helping the senior community in his hometown parish with all their computer, wi-fi, or electrical issues. it was common to hear of sam spending a saturday installing wi-fi or teaching a senior how to use their smart tv or iphone. yet, sam would always put his grandmother first in line. after his papa passed away when sam was finishing up 9th grade, he took on the role of being his grandma’s dedicated handyman. after a day of work spanning from cleaning out the garage to fixing blown electrical sockets, sam would collect his day’s wages: a home-cooked pasta dinner and quality conversation with his gamma! in an era of constant noise and commotion, sam worked hard to avoid distractions and stay focused on what really mattered. pico iyer noted, "the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them" ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). iyer also stated that these many interferences in our lives can actually distract us from the truly significant events. it is important to minimize these distractions so that we can fully take advantage of the beauties that life has to offer us. sam understood this critical life lesson at a young age. unlike many teens, he was not constantly connected to social media. one of sam’s favorite events of the day was coming together for family dinner – without cell phones! he found the beauty in connecting with others. he learned about the intricacies of his dad’s investing firm, the takeaways from his mom’s bible study, and the spins and jumps his sister was working on at the ice rink, but more importantly, he realized the value of sharing, listening, and connecting authentically with others. when he entered notre dame, he continued this family tradition with his friends during their nightly 5:15 section dinner where they connected over conversation and laughter. if there could only be one word to describe sam, it would be curious. from the very beginning, sam approached life with a unique sense of curiosity. at his 2nd birthday party, he walked around asking every guest to pick him up and take him to the garage so he could press the button and watch the pulley system in action. he opened and closed the garage door so many times that he blew out the motor. sam’s curiosity to learn how things work has always fed his hunger to learn. sam’s famous “what if” questions asked of his family and friends would inevitably invite everyone into his creative and curious mind and start a thought-provoking and fun conversation. as sister aletheia notes, your "life is going to end, and [you] have a limited amount of time" ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html moreau fye week three). sam took this quote to heart and opted to live every day as if it were his last. for sam, each day was a new opportunity and adventure in learning how this world worked. his curiosity always led to action. sam taught himself so much outside the classroom because he followed his hunger to learn about things that some people might not think were interesting. he devoured manuals and how-to videos for electronics, machines, and other devices as if they were jellybeans! sam also understood how important it was to have a grateful and humble heart. growing up in one of the wealthiest areas of the united states, it would have been easy for him to envy all of his friends' top-of-the-line possessions like their sports cars, boats, summer vacation homes, and ski chalets. as dr. jihoon kim noted in her study, "we often focus on the things we do not have" ("5 minutes" by grotto moreau fye week six) and we fail to acknowledge any of the positive outcomes that have arisen from the things that we are lacking. but sam did not approach life this way. he was thankful for everything he had and for the values his parents instilled in him. the positive outcome that arose from what sam lacked was a life of humble gratitude, not entitlement. and when he was around those that were not as fortunate as him, he did not boast about what he had or what he accomplished. even in the classroom, when sam scored significantly higher than everyone else on an exam, he told no one but his parents. he even made sure that his younger sister was not in earshot since he knew she struggled in math and science. when sam was permitted to boast, he really struggled to do so. at a prestigious national scientific competition, his professor had to help prepare his answers because sam felt extremely awkward highlighting his breakthroughs and accomplishments. sam truly lived the verse “when pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom” (proverbs 11:2). so today, we look back and appreciate this life well lived – a life colored in the love of god, family, and friends and guided by a desire to do what is right. let sam’s gift of childlike curiosity motivate you to look at the world differently and explore the unknown. until we all meet again in god’s heavenly kingdom, follow sam’s example and put down your cell phone and connect with a loved one over a bowl of jellybeans! that will make sam happy! https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 searching for true wealth dear derek, i’ve noticed your constant aim for precision and devotion of numerous hours into formulating a “perfect” answer. you have high, exacting standards for yourself, which isn’t a bad thing! understand, though, that life isn’t a utopia. when your ideal plans go awry, remain optimistic and confident in yourself. be grateful for every opportunity you earn; gratitude is a key aspect of life that you should remember and live by. i hope that you’ll always be grateful for the relationships in your life, as they’ll challenge you to grow and shape your perspectives. be sure to hone in on your collaboration skills, since a teamwork mentality will be crucial for success at notre dame and beyond! ultimately, you should develop and cherish genuine relationships with family, friends, and professors. remember not only your successes, but the learning moments behind them. stay driven, and i can guarantee your success in the future! as i reflected back on a letter i wrote to myself before starting my college experience, i considered my accomplishments thus far in my notre dame journey. thinking about my goals to cherish every moment rather than looking directly towards the future, reflecting on my letter to myself reminded me that my advice should encompass even the negative moments in life. especially since “good news (we come across can be) misunderstood (or) rejected” (constitutions of the congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12), it has become clear over my past year at notre dame that things that may initially seem like bad news can represent hidden opportunities that i may miss if i choose to reject/forget the learning moments. such a sentiment also connects to sister alethia’s devotion to helping people “find light” in the “darkest realities of life” (“​​meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). while death is still a foreign, morbid topic for me to consider, learning about how sister aletheia reflects on dying on a common basis taught me to understand the importance of cherishing the relationships that i have both with the people around me at notre dame, and even more so with my family. tying into the idea of cherishing the intangibles in life more than materialistic things, father michael hime’s assertions that satisfaction may not necessarily correlate to the joy an individual feels in life (week 3) inspired me to understand that i should look to fulfill a purpose beyond my personal goals of having a successful career. as such, this quote has inspired me to take part in activities that bring me true joy and less so the momentary satisfaction of completing redundant tasks. likewise, the revelation that focusing on “one or two parts of my self-concept for a career” can cause me to “eventually hit a wall” (navigating your career journey meruelo family center for career dev. week 4) was something that i definitely believe can be applied beyond my career but with life in general. using the example of earning money provided me a prime example of this, as i learned through consulting about career paths with my parents that embarking on a constant pursuit to earn as much as i can in my golden years can take a significant toll on my mental and social well being. through this conversation with them, i realized that throughout life, it is important to exercise all aspects of my self concept and not focus on an overly specific niche. after this conversation, i made it important to become more aware and appreciative of my surroundings and the experiences that have shaped who i am. learning that “thinking about [myself] isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing” myself (“the right way to be introspective by tara eurich moreau fye week 6) validated to me that thinking about the shallow things that i think can bring me happiness may actually bring upon more pressures that can contribute to burning out. the theme of being more positive also ties into the theme of helping others, which can help me build stronger relationships with the people i care about. the pope’s command to serve as “a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7) likewise communicated to me the importance of true relationships over physical objects. in spite of this, i feel it important to acknowledge that when speaking with others, it is important to truly empathize with them and not engage in conversation to “serve [personal] emotional and intellectual needs” rather than trying to “empower others” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week 11). having witnessed the personal struggles of my friends, many of whom are international students thousands of miles away from home, i learned that empathizing with them sometimes requires me to listen and learn about their struggles rather than make weak connections to how they feel. reading that “we do not have to travel far to get away from our less considered habits” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) similarly showed me that overcoming perceived obstacles towards being a less negative person is not as difficult as it seems. while i have not experienced the struggles of questioning my sexual orientation, i felt a connection to jacob walsh’s personal struggles of thinking that “if people knew the real [me], they wouldn’t love [me]” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). by making more attempts to stay in contact with my family and by spending more time with friends than i did last semester, i was able to set aside such an impression of myself and thus felt happier and more optimistic this semester. additionally, i made more efforts to help other people when they needed help with the courses i had experience taking. the concept of accompaniment, which “reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that “over there” and “here” are intertwined” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9), certainly can be used to define my experiences where i heard the experiences of others while getting the opportunity to share my struggles with them. these experiences helped me feel more cared for, and i thus got the impression that my relationships with others strengthened. through these experiences, it has become more of an objective for me to “serve as inspiring role models to a rising generation of soon-to-be notre dame graduates” (domer dozen moreau fye week 2) by putting the immediate interests of others before mine. doing so while exploring who i am (week 5) has helped me build more meaningful connections with the people around me as well as have a greater understanding of what it means to be selfless. overall, by looking back on the path that i have taken at the university of notre dame, i have gotten the chance to measure how well i have been able to align my values with honorable virtues. my exposure to numerous perspectives over the course of this past year has compelled me to ask various questions about how i should expand on my faith, what i truly value in community, and the best ways to express myself. by further integrating myself into more concrete groups of friends at notre dame and through developing a personal mission statement (week 13), i have gotten the opportunity to truly see my intellect grow. tracing my footsteps, i now have a stronger idea of where my path seeking true wealth shall continue chasing valuable relationships with others. professor espeseth integration 3 march 4, 2022 "based on the last seven weeks of moreau and your own experiences, what is your definition of 'a life well-lived'?" during the past seven weeks of moreau, i have learned a lot about what a life well-lived looks like. i have used these perspectives to look back on my life and consider how i have my own definition of a life well lived. in combination with the lessons we’ve learned in class, i think that a life well-lived is centered around the concept of balance. it is unrealistic to believe that everything in life is happy and enjoyable. rather, it is sometimes the hardships that you endure that make you realize your happiness in those moments. in my perspective, the most important factors in maintaining a life well-lived are your relationships and values, career and leisure time, and method of overcoming hardships. the way these factors are balanced with one another guide the way that i live my life, and plan to do in the future. in my opinion, the most important factor in living a life well lived is developing and maintaining your relationships with friends and family. if you are the most successful person, but don’t have meaningful relationships, then i believe that you don’t have a life well-lived. as important as your personal relationships with your friends and family are, i have also learned, since being in college, that being a part of a welcoming community that you are a part of is just as important. as said by pope francis, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis-moreau fye week 7). this quote reflects how even if everything in your life is not going well, the love that you receive from your friends, family, and community are all that you need to feel supported. my experiences within the notre dame community have made me realize that a support system of people is essential in living a life well-lived in college. an important aspect of developing meaningful relationships is finding those who share similar values to you, while being flexible with your values. at the same time, it is important to be willing to change your values after enduring new experiences. as noted by father hesburgh, “civil rights is not just about black americans, it’s about all of us, and what we are, and what are our qualities, what are our values as human beings” (hesburgh film br leon panetta 51:02-moreau fye week 2). although he was addressing the civil rights movement, his message of the importance of our qualities and values in bringing together diverse communities highlights the process of developing relationships. especially in college, i have realized how important trust is in my development of relationships with friends and classmates. although we come from different backgrounds, a supportive environment of individuals who share my values help me to live a life well-lived. another important aspect to living a life well-lived in developing a healthy work-leisure balance. while finding success and satisfaction from your career is essential, this success can not be enjoyed if not balanced with leisure. finding satisfaction within your career stems from your experiences in college, and learning what your strengths and weaknesses are. i agree that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course by meruelo family center for career development-moreau fye week 4). i find that engaging in courses and activities that i had not been involved in before, such as dorm life and courses such as intro to entrepreneurship have pushed me out of my comfort since, but have greatly benefited my life. if you don’t push yourself to do things that you are not comfortable with, it will be impossible to experience growth, which is necessary for staying content with yourself. an instance in which my mother identified that i was in the zone with a subject i enjoyed is when she noted, “i was singularly impressed by your ability to apply your innate talents about fashion design and marketing to a project you loved and it was a true demonstration of the belief that you have to love what you do to truly succeed”(week 5kathleen navas-moreau fye week 5). at the same time, it is important to not push yourself too hard, and take breaks from learning experiences with leisure time. breaks from productivity are necessary in order for those activities to be productive. as said by pico iyer, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week 1). during the college experience, i have learned that leisure time, whether it be going on runs around the lakes, hanging out with my friends at duncan student center, and playing the guitar, are important for my mental wellbeing. if i don’t take time out of my day to do at least one of these things, it is difficult for me to appreciate any success i achieve. lastly, a realization i have come to during my time at notre dame is that although we can do the best we can to avoid hardships, it is ultimately the way in which we respond to these hardships that define us. if one is able to respond to an obstacle in an appropriate manner, they are able to continue to live a life well-lived despite these hardships. it is especially present at highly-ranked universities like notre dame that the students put immense pressure on themselves to be perfect. however, “research suggests that self-analyzers tend to have more anxiety, less positive social experiences and more negative attitudes about themselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way” by eurich-moreau week 6). i have learned to correctly respond to self-criticism is to look at all the things that i have put effort into, rather than think about all the things that i could’ve done differently. an instance where this lesson is applicable is when i received a test grade lower than i would have liked to. rather than thinking of the problems i didn’t review enough, i felt good about all the information i studied for hours and now will remember for the rest of the semester. although this is a small example, it can be applied to bigger picture hardships, such as relationships. just because a relationship with someone ends, doesn’t mean you can’t still cherish and appreciate all the time you spent with that person. similarly, it is important to be able to correctly respond and overcome your fears. a concept introduced by sister aletheia is “to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by eurich-moreau fye week 3). through this concept, sister aletheia is challenging people to use your fears as a motivator for other aspects of your life. in this example, she is telling us to use human fear of death as a way to appreciate each day, and to ensure we are able to live a life well-lived each day. i apply this message in my life at notre dame every day by looking at the big picture of my life and enjoying the short 4 years that i have heard as much as i can. during my time at notre dame, i have learned many important lessons that help me to live a life well-lived in a stressful, college setting. however, the support system i gained from this community of similar valued people helps me to feel appreciated and understood by my peers. my prospective career and hobbies that i enjoy help to maintain a healthy work-social life balance that motivates me to perform well in school and engage in extracurricular activities i enjoy. lastly, methods of overcoming hardships and excessive self-examination have helped me gain more confidence in myself. i am able to act more confidently in all aspects of my life, and will continue to learn during my time at notre dame. i am grateful that this institution takes the time to educate its students on the importance of balance, as it produces individuals who will meaningfully contribute to society. final integration francisco machado 4/29/22 final integration throughout the semester, i have been asked to question the most important things in my life and to think about what really matters most. as a catholic, my faith is a big part of what gives meaning to my life and how i approach everything i do including how i act, present myself, and deal with suffering and death. what my faith says about our purpose in this life is that god created each one of us out of love so that we might love and be with him forever. but how exactly do we follow what he wants for us and how are we called to follow his will for us. firstly we need to get rid of the distractions within our lives that keep us from being able to focus on the bigger questions that life presents us with. as pico iyer puts it in her ted talk, “put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it. it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” 1 i think it is so hard to actually do this because we are constantly bombarded with information from social media, the news, and our phones all the time. when we waste time on things such as these things, i feel as though we lose focus on the more valuable things that life has to offer us. fr. hesburgh gives us an exemplary model for this as he shows us how a life well lived really looked like. one of the lines that really stuck out to me in this movie was, “ “fr. ted’s leadership has really shown the world what catholicism really is.” 2 he was willing to put everything on the line for the sole purpose of 2 "hesburgh (links to an external site.)" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) (week 2) 1 text: "why we need to slow down our lives" (pico iyer, ted) (week 1) https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 pursuing justice and truth. his legacy still lives on today through the students at this great university. we can see this legacy through the various things graduates from this university are doing now to better the lives of others. i think that one of the ways that i have learned to be happy is through helping others. i have found that sacrificing my time for others and being there for them when they need it the most gives me a real sense of purpose and gratitude for what i have been given. i feel like a lot of people “ us live our lives as if our lives were a star in a motion picture movie in which we have the lead role and everyone else plays a supporting role.” 3. i also fall into the trap of pretending that i am the star of my own movie. in my experience, i have found it is a bad way to live. giving up your life as a sacrifice for others is exactly what christ calls us to do and it is what fr. himes and sister theresa aletheia noble advocate for us as we only have so much time here on this earth. i need to be reminded of death more often as i continue living this life as it could come at any moment. if i were to die right now, would i be able to meet god face to face? would i be able to say i have had a good effect on the lives of others? these are questions i hardly think about but that i need to answer. these questions also lead me to think about all the things i need to be grateful for. i take my family, friends, and opportunities for granted very often. these questions led me to start thinking about what i will eventually do for a living. “if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” 4 for week five we were told to have a deep conversation with someone important to us. i struggle to see what i want to do in my life and i have prayed about it, but i do not think there is one quick answer. this process takes 4 text: “navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) 3 text: "three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes) (week 3) https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/modules/16272 time and deep thought and prayer. we talked about how we both wanted to help other people in some way that directly makes an impact on their lives. i brought up the idea of becoming a doctor, because i think it is one of the most honorable professions by nature. if done with the right intention, i think it is a profession of true charity. we also both discussed the priesthood as our vocation in life, and agreed that we needed to do more discernment about both priesthood and married life. talking about what we think we are good at, my friend told me that i was a good person and that i was also very driven to learn. this is to the extent to which we talked and i really enjoyed the conversation. 5 i think that in order to follow the path i want to take in order to follow the path to the good life, being mindful and finding the time to pray is especially important. oftentimes, i ask why something happened to me or why am i thinking this way instead of getting a bigger picture of myself and my desires. one way i try to calm myself down and be mindful is through praying the rosary which i have found to be very beneficial toward my mindfulness. i have used other apps such as the hallow app which work great as well. i feel as though oftentimes our emotions and our experiences can cloud our judgment about certain things in our life, and for me, finding that place of peace has helped me tremendously to reflect on my daily life, but also the bigger questions in life. as tasha eurich says in her ted article, “why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future.6 by spending time with the lord, i am able to connect with my creator and ask for his help to guide me through this life with intentionality and love. to love others we must also be in right relationship with them. we are relational creatures that desire love and friendship with others. this means that we must also treat others with the 6 "the right way to be introspective" (tasha eurich, ted conferences) (week 6) 5 "week five discernment conversation activity" (week 5) https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing dignity and respect that they deserve as creatures who require the same needs that we do. as pope francis says, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the 'other' is not a statistic, or a number," he says. "we all need each other." 7 to take what christ says seriously we need to lay down our lives for each other and be a light to those who do not know the person of christ. i think this is what my main mission in life is ordered toward. this life is filled with suffering which we all must experience and if we do not have a meaning for that suffering, i think that it can take a toll on our well being. in the story of professor steve reifenberg, we can see that out of suffering and pain, a greater beauty and power can come from it.8 my grandmother just passed as of recently, and it is so hard to deal with the pain of losing someone you love so much. i think to deal with suffering we must unite our suffering with christs’ and use the suffering we endure to achieve some greater good out of it. in doing so, we must also help other around us carry their burdens as well. i think that the quote from fr. jenkins expresses this perfectly: “go now — become worthy sons and daughters of your seminary. inspired by its example, go preach love, stand fast against the momentum of your times, and renew the face of the earth.” 9 i think that we also need to have an open mind to all perspectives if we are going to pursue the truth. anything that shows us part of the truth, shows us a part of god. i think that we all fall into the trap of surrounding ourselves with ideas and people that affirm our beliefs rather than challenge them. as professor blaschko says, “echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles, partly because of their ability to lock us into certain world views.” 10 it can be 10 how to avoid an echo chamber” (dr. paul blaschko, thinknd) (week 11) 9 “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” (du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame)(week 10) 8“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey togethe r” (professor steve reifenberg)(week 9) 7 “why the only future worth building includes everyone” (his holiness pope francis, ted conferences) (week 7) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript dangerous to live in this sort of echo chamber because if one is always being taught or told a certain thing and the thing is false, even a sound and valid argument may not be able to break through their mindset. i find that in politics, people give into these echo chambers and when they are challenged, then they attack the other person’s character or actions rather than addressing the argument. i think if people at least considered more perspectives, we would be able to get along with each other in all aspects of life. i think that the video and the audio are a reminder that we need to be more receptive to different viewpoints before making our own thoughts about a situation. it can be dangerous to live in this sort of echo chamber because if one is always being taught or told a certain thing and the thing is false, even a sound and valid argument may not be able to break through their mindset. to live a life of virtue and intentionality, we also must act. we must take action in a world that values inaction. courage embodies the mission of the church and was a virtue which christ acted out perfectly. courage requires us to step out of our own egos and self and seek the love of christ in all things. i think to embody courage means to take the cross we have each been given and carry it with a smile on our faces. the constitutions say, “the mission is not simple, for the impoverishment we would relieve are not simple. there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them. we must be aware and also understanding by reason of fellowship with the impoverished and by reason of patient learning. for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act.” 11 when we seclude ourselves to our own problems, we forget how we could reach out to others and lift each other up in our sufferings. when we fail to understand 11 “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 (week 12) https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ that each one of us wants to be loved and needs to be loved, we forget that we are all on a mission together to find happiness. as a catholic, i believe that the path to a good life is through acting out the teachings of jesus christ and keeping the beliefs of the church. my mission is to love and serve god. i just lost my grandmother unexpectedly this past weekend and writing my own eulogy helped me to realize that this life is short lived and goes quickly. mortality is a reality that we all have to face and i think it is a good reminder to think about it every day. i consider that the highest good in life is a life devoted to god and his will for our lives. “the mission is not simple, for the impoverishments we would relieve are not simple. there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them. we must be aware and also understanding by reason of fellowship with the impoverished and by reason of patient learning. for the kingdom to come in this world, disciples must have the competence to see and the courage to act.”12 12 “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 (week 12) https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ integration 3 march 4, 2022 moreau fye integration three throughout my time at notre dame, we have spent a large amount of time discerning what a well-lived, successful life looks like. my greatest rumination on success has come from malcolm gladwell’s outliers. this novel prompted me to define my own version of success. it encouraged me to think about what i wanted out of life and about what joy meant to me. although i am young and know my judgments may change, i found that the quote, “if you’re happy doing what you’re doing, no one can tell you you’re unsuccessful,” truly encompasses what’s most important for me. this novel changed the way i look at my future and the way i picture my career and life prospects. additionally, outliers also gave insight on how to achieve our personal goals, as well as what other societal aspects are in play. gladwell said that “the outliers in a particular field reached their lofty status through a combination of ability, opportunity, and utterly arbitrary advantage.” he comments that society puts altogether too much emphasis on an individual’s ability in achieving success. so much is due to opportunity, and i feel that we have been given a great opportunity with a spot here at notre dame. i hope to take advantage of the wonderful and abundant fortuities here to achieve my definition of success and live a well-lived life. for me, the first aspect of a well-lived life is leaving the world better than i found it. in this manner, we can all learn from father hesburgh, who did amazing work inside and outside the notre dame community through organizations like the national science board and the us commission of civil rights. he encouraged others to work together for the common good, and this consistently inspired his well-lived life. (week 2) i can emulate father hesburgh in my own life in several different ways, whether that be through my career, service projects, or simply being a good person. i first want to help others through my career as a doctor. ultimately, after acquiring many years of experience and the resources to do so, i hope to work in underserved areas both locally and abroad and provide healthcare to areas with undeveloped or unstable healthcare systems. i also would love to work in health policy with the united nations; my sister is currently working with the world food program italy, and it seems very fulfilling and beneficial to others. i also feel that i can leave the world better than i found it through everyday actions. i can give my seat to others on the bus, smile at people i pass on the street, and pick up trash from the sidewalk. prioritizing generosity, kindness, and inclusion in my everyday life is important to me, and i feel that over time it can have a large impact. in these ways, i hope to have a net positive impact on the world and on others, and ultimately make the world a better place. the second aspect of a well-lived life is looking forward to waking up and experiencing each day. in high school, i had a conversation with one of my favorite teachers about career prospects and the balance between financial security and happiness. i remember her saying that although her financial situation was not ideal, she woke up every morning and truly wanted to come into work. this had a large impact on me because it was such a rare sentiment among the adults that i knew. this was evident in her teaching as well; students could tell that she truly cared about what she taught and about her students. in this way, i feel that success is partly defined by the joy we find in what we do. i am very interested in healthcare as a system and how we can improve it, especially in the united states. i hope to explore this more through the minor “health, humanities, and society,” but i am not yet sure how to incorporate this into my larger path. i will definitely keep exploring, but i do believe that i will find satisfaction and fulfillment as a doctor. another aspect of joy is being happy with who i am as a person. i believe that we find confidence when we focus not on loving ourselves, but on loving being ourselves. we should focus not on constructing a person that we feel is worthy of love, but on finding joy in expressing our true and natural selves. social media can easily hinder this, as we are constantly bombarded with ideas of who or what society thinks we should be. in this area, i hope to take after kevin kelly in that “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length… so that i can more easily remember who i am.” (week 1) i learned in psychology that people with a stronger self-concept have higher levels of happiness. without so many conflicting ideas on what a fun, happy, successful person is, i can better maintain my true self and have a stronger knowledge of who i am. finally, i feel that an important aspect of enjoying daily life is hope. as human beings, we are going to struggle. we are going to have tough days and difficult experiences. i can overcome these by maintaining faith in the future, and knowing that things always get better. this will prevent me from focusing on the negative and leaning into adverse emotions. this is essential to a well-lived life because it will increase overall joy and peace. ultimately, if i can truly look forward to waking up each day, i will have lived a well-lived life. a well-lived life is also full of meaningful, joyful relationships. i love people. i love meeting new people, talking to people that i’ve known for years, getting to know the deeper parts of people, and laughing with people. good people can make all the difference. i hope to continue to be surrounded by people i care about and people that care about me. throughout my life, even in the most difficult times, i have found that if i have people in my corner, everything is okay. these platonic, familial, and romantic relationships truly are the foundation of a fulfilling life for me. my time at notre dame has shown me the importance of vulnerability and honesty in such relationships; i have become closest with the people that i share the most with, which was especially shown when i had the conversation about the future with my friend. (week 5) deep conversations lead to deep friendship, so opening up is essential. i am happiest when i am with others, so my well-lived life is one filled with people that i can laugh with, cry with, dance with, and smile with. it is also important to me to experience all that the world has to offer. i want to travel and immerse myself in different cultures and environments. i get so much joy from visiting other countries, hiking to natural wonders, and spending time learning about different communities and ways of life. the earth is such a vast and diverse place, and i want to experience as much of it as possible. i feel as though it is waiting for us to explore, and i’ve only just barely begun. at notre dame, i have been immersing myself more into spanish culture through language classes and the multilingual reading club, and it is very fulfilling and exciting. i want to make memories and have stories to tell, to write about, and to remember. i want to take risks, get out of my comfort zone, and live without fear. while going to new places and situations can be scary, this is where we grow the most as humans. one of my favorite authors, glennon doyle, said that “if you can't beat fear, just do it scared.” i love this quotation because it shows that anxiety and apprehension should not and cannot stop us. we are capable of doing difficult things, even if it means doing them afraid. as such, i want to take advantage of the beautiful place that earth is, and the beautiful diversity of thought and community that humans have created. while i am sure that my definition of a well-lived life will grow and change as i get older, these core principles will remain the same. in this way, notre dame acts as “a place to go from” in that it prepares us to go into the world and live the best life possible, no matter what that means to each individual. i am so excited for the next three years and for the world beyond. integration #3 zachary sellman zachary sellman moreau first-year experience integration #3 february 27th, 2022 the life of a wandering golfer zachary michael sellman was born on a rainy spring morning on april 17th of 2003. like rainy mornings, zach was soft spoken and calm, yet he undeniably knew how to leave his surroundings better, healthier than he found them. zach, as he wished, will always be remembered as someone who was kind, but even more so, always had the patience to be kind. this patience, i believe, was his most special of traits. it was the trait that led to his constant trust in others, in himself, and, ultimately, in goodness. now, i am quite sure we have all wondered where this patience had come from, and if, indeed, it was present in every part of his life. today, i am ready to tell you all what and where i believe zach’s patience came from, as well as about a few times when he was not so patient. you see, zach was a golfer, and whenever i stood between him and the golf course, he was not so patient with me. to some family breakfasts, he said, “i’ll pick up donuts on my way home from playing 18.”. on a few summer days when the beach was open and i was already packing a picnic basket with towels and sunscreen, i watched him leisurely walk about the door, golf clubs draped over his shoulder, waving goodbye. in a sense, his endless obsession with golfing was a bit frustrating, but i always understood his reasoning. zach understood that we need time to ourselves for reflection. in such hectic lives, such as his, it is immensely important to compartmentalize some of our time by putting it towards activities that unfailingly interest us and make us happy. in a recent ted article i read, a quote in it echoed this sentiment: “the places that move us most deeply are often the ones we recognize like long-lost friends; we come to them with a piercing sense of familiarity, as if returning to some source we already know.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). for him, the golf course was where he could take his mind off of an otherwise stressful, impatience inducing life. his time alone and away from his stress gave him the time necessary to be introspective in the right ways. he could focus on himself and his future, and afterwards he could use his time efficiently and be the best version of himself towards others (moreau fye week six). his work life was certainly stressful, but i admired him for what he did. he worked many different sorts of jobs, mostly surrounding software engineering, but each one of his jobs, he told me, he picked with a purpose. zach understood that this type discernment is crucial to living a life worth living (moreau fye week five). he only ever chose jobs that, even if they were stressful, he to some degree he enjoyed. even more importantly though, he chose all the jobs he did in order to help others and help causes he cared about. some of his jobs involved apps and websites in the medical field that would help users with a variety of different problems. with all of this, he definitely knew a few important things about navigating careers. he always told me that living and working in your life is certainly never a one stop process. although while he was an undergraduate student at the university of notre dame he indeed chose his major, his whole life, as i saw, was about finding what we cared about and working towards it. it was not a one stop event, but rather a lifetime of discernment: “as you can see, career development is a process and a journey. if you actively engage in the process, take ownership, and utilize the tools at your disposal you will reap the benefits and establish a satisfying professional life.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ away from work, he understood how service was crucial for someone’s role in the community. he worked for a multitude of different service organizations, from youth on course to even his own organization devoted to increasing the amount and effects of free coding educational programs in his minneapolis, minnesota community. in a lot of the time he did have and was able to, he worked to leave the world better than he found it. in this way, he has always been a person that i have looked to when i am confused about how to live my life. his inspiring life answered all of the questions and concerns that i had. (moreau fye week two). he also was everything to me and the rest of his family. he leaned on us when he needed to, as anyone does, but he was always there and so reliable for our family to talk to and ask for help. zach understood the importance of relationships and family in a way that really spoke to the person he was. everyone could turn to him, he was everything to everybody, and he represented this because that is who he was. i think, though, that what he did for our family really helped him in a crucial way as well. building the relationships that he did within our family made him stronger in other parts of his life, and ultimately led him to being a happier, more fulfilled person. (moreau fye week seven). in his retirement, he devoted tons of his time to us and our family, but also, as we all know, to his passion of golfing. many a day during this time he spent walking courses he dreamed of playing all his life, or just practicing in our backyard. this was a release for him, as i mentioned earlier, but also it was more than that. his life, as i discussed today, was very full of giving and working. but, he also knew of the necessity of having something to do that would capture his attention, lead him to unfailingly lose all track of time, and something that would anchor him to a state of happiness and excitement. he spoke about his death quite little, even as he knew it was imminent, but in the times he did, he reflected on how death made him structure his life in a way that would make his life more meaningful. because zach knew his time was limited, he focused on making his life have an impact in his work life, service life, and family life, but he understood that he also had to do the things he loved, like golfing, as well. he told me of how he found the very greatest joys in life by intentionally focusing on the fact that he had limited time to enjoy them. as sister aletheia said, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html castillo_s2_integration3_week8 castillo 1 vanessa chan moreau march 4, 2022 living her own life: a life that was shaped by others . when describing her role, people would call her a leader, musician, teammate, engineer, daughter, sister, and friend. most people would describe her as a really nice girl, friendly, very quiet, definitely an introvert. yet to those who really knew her, the words sarcastic and fun definitely come to mind when thinking about her. she strove to live her best life every day, centering her entire life and daily activities around god. kateri was filled with a “joy [that] comes from within” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). there would always be a smile on her face, especially when she was around her friends. sometimes it would be this mischievous smile that made you wonder what she was thinking of at the moment but usually it was just filled with pure joy. there would be times when i would be walking around with her, and a smile would just light up her face. when i would ask her about it at that moment, she would turn around with a completely straight face and act as if she did not hear the question. later in life, she revealed that during those moments, she was just thanking god for the people she was with and laughing with him about the way he brought these friends into her life. but she had been embarrassed to share earlier because of how much her thoughts at the moment would reveal about her and our friendship. she was “able to find people who inspire[d]” her, resulting in her being “just fine” throughout life ("domer dozen" by dr. austin hickman – moreau fye week two). she would claim that those people helped to inspire her to become a better person each day. her parents castillo 2 taught her to work hard and stay strong in her catholic faith. her siblings helped her to think outside of herself, become a leader and be the best older sister they could ever have. her friends were there for her through thick and thin. they inspired her in college to work hard and keep her faith. they also helped her to keep god present in all of her daily activities. kateri was a hard worker…though she found herself more productive when she studied with friends who held her accountable. she was a busy woman who knew how to get stuff done. she would be the one person people would rely on to get a job done. and she would do it with a smile on her face and a little prayer to god. as i mentioned earlier, she found herself more productive in her studies when she was with her friends. yet she also realized that when she intentionally set just ten minutes of her time for god, god gave her the time she needed to be productive. she noted that “the more time [she spent] away from [her] work, the better that work [was], most often” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). so, she made sure that she always spent at least ten minutes with god and spent quality time with her friends and family. when she first mentioned spending ten minutes with god and going to mass every day, i thought, good for her. i really valued how strong she was in her faith. yet, as i learned, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). her brief mentioning of her habits of going to mass every day and spending at least ten minutes with jesus really stuck with me. even though it came up so casually in conversation, she inspired me to practice my faith more and for that i am eternally grateful. i just wish i had told her all of this before, but i am sure that god told her when they were reunited. kateri once told me that she was thankful for the many deep conversations we had had. castillo 3 perhaps it was due to her indecisiveness or maybe her stubbornness, but she always had trouble admitting stuff to herself. but she said that her conversations with me helped her to admit stuff to herself (moreau fye week five). for example, for the longest time she would not admit to herself that she liked this guy even though i noticed it, quite obviously, before her. but eventually, she learned to embrace change and said that she attributed it to the many conversations we had, which left me very honored to be her friend. kateri taught me to not ask myself why otherwise i would be “putting [myself] in a victim mentality” and feeling pretty terrible (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). she told me that she used to do that all of the time with her siblings, take the blame even when it was not her fault. whenever she thought about why a certain situation happened, her answer would always be that it was because it was her fault that she did not prevent the situation from happening. and then she would feel bad for herself and forget to think about others. i share this story because she wanted to remind others that we cannot always be the victim and to highlight the fact that she was always striving to become a better person, or in this case, a better sister to her siblings. her desire to serve others and be a better person for each of the people she encountered was one of the characteristics of kateri that made her an amazing person. as we were conversing about life in general, she told me that she never would have been able to live the life she lived without all of the people in her life who helped her. she said that if she had just lived life in a very individualistic mindset she would not have had much but by living life with all of the people she encountered she was able to have a “potful of plenty” in life (“tattoos on the heart: chapter 8 jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). when i asked her to elaborate, she said that the person she is today is not just because of her but because of all of the people who helped to shape her life. everyone she encountered helped to castillo 4 shape her into the person we know her and remember her as today. and she said that it is through all of these people that she was able to live a life well-lived, a life oriented around god and serving others. though we will all miss kateri, let us remember her life and her dedication of living life not just for herself but for others. and let us be inspired to follow in her footsteps and live a life filled with joy, friends, family, and god. capstone integration capstone integration i honestly still don’t know what a “life well-lived” looks like for me. in terms of what i want to do with my life, where i want to be, who i want to be with–that’s all extremely up in the air. all i know is that i can take certain steps in the way i approach everyday life that will take me where i’m supposed to be. it won’t always be easy, but every experience builds my character bit by bit. throughout freshman year of college, i was caught up with all the things to do on campus. i wanted to do pemco (pasquerilla east musical company), ultimate frisbee club, club softball, club field hockey, and many other activities. my extracurricular interests are very much like my academic interests–i want to do as many things as possible. in week four, we completed a questionnaire to evaluate our career interests. one of the questions was, “if you knew you couldn’t fail, what might you most like to do?” (“7 clues: an interactive assessment activity” – moreau fye week four). when i saw this question, i didn’t immediately think about a dream job or career. instead, i thought about how i would participate in everything i was interested in. most of these clubs i was interested in i considered “fun.” this meant it was a break from school and work. but “if i take time off, i somehow believe, i’ll be that much more hurried the rest of the time” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). this is exactly what started to happen to me during the second semester. i ended up settling on pemco and ultimate frisbee as my main activities. but my second semester classes were a lot more work, and my role in pemco got larger. going to rehearsal was my favorite part of every day, but i ended up being extremely rushed on lots of my school work, and i did not do as well in some of my classes as i knew i could have. as someone who feels extremely rewarded by doing well in school, this was disheartening. the spring semester was definitely more difficult than the first. but “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). while i didn’t do as well academically as i wanted to, i realized something important to take with me the rest of my college experience. the value i get from the time i spend with my friends in pemco and ultimate frisbee is way more than the disappointment i get from a lower grade. i think the environment in high school was very much focused on what you’d put on your college applications. even extracurriculars–which are supposed to be fun–had an end goal. but now, i feel that i can participate in things just because i want to. the question of what i could do if i knew i couldn’t fail is great. but it often gets me “focused on what i could not do” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week 6). instead, i’ve decided i’m going to focus on thoroughly enjoying what i’ve decided to prioritize in my life. with all these activities comes many, many relationships. i interact with so many people everyday, and how i interact with them is incredibly important. i’ve encountered some situations where i’m asked an opinion on something–for example, an essay or a decision about the musical https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 we’re putting on. and this question comes from a close friend. i’ve learned that “the most loyal thing i can do…is be honest” (hesburgh – moreau fye week two). everyone is hear to grow and learn, which cannot happen without knowing what we can work on. while i’ve learned it’s important to not be afraid of criticism, i’ve additionally come to understand that there is still a way to be positive with it. if we all help each other out by instilling hope in one another, then we may all be better off, because “hope began with one ‘you.’ when there is an ‘us,’ there begins a revolution” (“jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, from tattoos on the heart – moreau fye week 7). these types of interactions require teaching each other. everyone has different skills. one of my friends is very good at writing, and she sometimes generously reads essays of mine. in return, i look at videos she’s made and helped her with editing software. oftentimes, i don’t feel qualified to help someone out even if i have the knowledge to do so. i was always a shy kid, and “i imagined that a good teacher would be in control and should be the expert” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). but during a discernment conversation with my mom, she surprised me by saying i “actually have the qualities of a good leader,” i am just comfortable not exerting them (discernment activity with mom– moreau fye week five). that gave me the confidence i needed to step out of my comfort zone a little bit and take initiative of how i want to spend my time. if everyone is teaching each other, it seems that there isn’t anything we can’t do. if someone has an opposing view, “if [you] really care about moving them,” you have to think about what “they care about that i care about that i can leverage to move them in my direction” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week 11). however, we have to be careful. it’s easy to get caught up in what we can do for ourselves and for others that we don’t know when to take a step back and let someone else be in the spotlight. i learned a valuable application of this lesson for our allyship activity, where i watched a video on how white people can remove themselves from the racism conversation when needed to let black people’s voices be heard (“allyship activity” – moreau fye week twelve). not doing so leads to a toxic belief that we are moving forward when we really are not. it takes “let[ting] go of your racial certitude and reach[ing] for humility” to serve others in a beneficial way (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo – moreau fye week 10). overall, my personal mission is to find small ways everyday to better myself (“personal mission statement” – moreau fye week 13). through this, i can work towards living my best life and helping others do the same both with and without personal interactions. https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjbb%2biweix%2fsut3xem4pleais1afylto8luw74gjxnaivg4hqeff18hetuxap9sjeb4ng%2fge5jty8s8cwf9ce8dkauwiynb7mrvdusyh9kotcjhakmy14myhjf5%2bcyt02wgb1jwbywp1fowrjellkqdldu5qz0vxwkaxsmwztdjltkrijmozro%2flfh4f6wluygpzhksnopryujxedqdl8bwtqvn%2fnv3xp1gz6gwlwyn1ggcbhmop2myam5h9xs%2fkl%2fw2d1glhei5d0rc36ireccnwu72rd08qpj5f%2f9qbqwhvby%2ffc6vno%2fzz3vaiupetq7kxcvwm9%2frythe%2bw1ictdzloexcn6w4i5edie4xy1ds3yndhnvchvx9un2uf66idkoi7eikikw15c7%2f7ca%2fe%2bmf%2fhxulikjmx4nq2msrlsd%2bnm28obdbpu8vlf%2fal%2fnu5fadhs%2f%2bjpefftk6ortz73uwiwezv52denphya0e6p25noz9tprvk%2fv1us1c%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=l1hjckjeqwwvzn%2bfrib2cwaq4hcndv8qtmlobavhiyziedks0xyvax4tys%2bzpdytwlyr%2fbq7mszd2svs8xitri4pxpmf2gm5%2fetqxobdt8nbxhwy8ac%2fgxg0x%2br3nnq3f4wuvqv23nk1wz%2bq8z0qyjrhfcaorxwh4tojfhwjg1yw%2fvxelooqd6ay0uti%2fsr5jwpvb7jsuo64zxg5fdawms%2bw0thjaf5gt%2fxxwdamjm%2bjjsb%2fjptzbxf8kispspdfqrov3xstzgngbqgerpcejeigw%2fplbml2jd5h0swa%2fotnibgatmhks9kmsjflh6zv45a4gsbdyfsybetqtjj%2bpq%3d%3d https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/523817?module_item_id=167946 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/assignments/49296?module_item_id=143533 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/10xiiv4dohkncz2phc6qlof_7jg-je-mjpaji2f1tvmg/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xyy_9tj_kqpem6w_ao28f37rohw5c_yofq_-v7xguh4/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1xyy_9tj_kqpem6w_ao28f37rohw5c_yofq_-v7xguh4/edit keely mcglone father kevin moreau first year experience 24 april 2022 a mountain pass leading towards transcendence growing up, i was always told notre dame was something special. my mom, who was a swimmer here, always described it as “the best, most beautiful, and most special place on earth.” notre dame was completely foreign to me at this point in my life—i couldn’t remember if it was in indiana or illinois, and i didn’t make visits to campus, though i went to a few away football games. however, what notre dame stands for has never been a foreign idea to me, as i have grown up with. it has shaped the way i was raised by my mom and my relationships with my aunt and uncle who also went here, and now that i have the privilege of attending the school myself, i feel as though i truly understand the global impact notre dame has on individuals. most importantly, i see the capacity i have for social change through reflective leadership because of these values and because of the lessons i have learned as a first-year student. a lot of what defines notre dame students is their leadership; if you talk to any student here, they can probably list multiple leadership positions they held in high school that they listed on their notre dame application. what differentiates leadership at notre dame from leadership at other top institutions is the use of reflective leadership to be a force for good. william deresiewicz in his speech, “solitude and leadership,” shows the importance of reflective leadership (week 7). while deresiewicz stresses the importance of independent reflection in leadership, he also notes that good leaders practice introspection with others. when one steps back to consider deresiewicz’s point, it makes sense that good leaders are comfortable alone because it often this time that allows them to observe and make quality decisions on the behalf of others. so, reflective leadership allows you to avoid being the tyrant, condescending leaders we all despise and allows you to embrace the selfless, caring, and loving leader we all hope to be. in my education at notre dame, i have many times been challenged to be a reflective leader by being but in difficult situations where my decision affects others, and it is enticing to make the selfish decision that only benefits yourself. but by practicing the reflective leadership deresiewicz explains, i can be a force for good. i see this type of decision making in my peers here, and i truly believe it is because of the emphasis notre dame puts on the integrity of the person. reflective leading isn’t black and white, though, and there are certain characteristics a reflective leader must embody. among these characteristics that are necessary to become a reflective leader with the power to shape others are empathy and wisdom. this semester, i have learned that empathy is the trait i care about most in a leader. i do not find any leader to be effective if they are not willing to be empathetic. louise richardson in the 2018 notre dame commencement speaks on empathy, noting that “to see the world from another’s perspective is a critical life skill, it is a hallmark of a vibrant democracy and a civilized society” (week 9). in my reflection, i noted that “i am an extremely empathetic person, almost too empathetic at times.” i have come to learn from my first semester that this is specifically what makes me an effective leader, and it is not a weakness. where others sometimes care more about themselves, i am able to take a step back, consider other people’s feelings, and decide the best course of action for the group. empathy thus feeds into reflective leadership; one most reflect to be empathetic, and empathy makes someone a leader. along with empathy, wisdom is crucial to practice reflective leadership effectively. paul blaschko says, “if you think about what separates us from all other animals, it’s—at least in part—our ability to consciously think, reflect on our lives, and intentionally direct those lives in accord with our vision of what’s good” (week 12). these traits separate animal from human, but they also separate good leader from bad. someone who embodies wisdom is someone who learns and reflects from experiences and shares that with others. wisdom requires reflecting on experiences, so those who are wise embody a crucial characteristic needed for reflective leadership. my time so far at notre dame has challenged me, and i believe it is these challenges that ultimately help me embody wisdom, giving me the capacity to be a reflective leader who strives to make a difference. when i make a mistake or experience a shortcoming, i practice optimistic introspection, my modified take on tasha eurich’s “the right way to be intrsopective” (week 6), and learn from that mistake, giving me wisdom that allows me to impact others around me. with this reflective leadership that notre dame has introduced me to, i have a certain hope for transcendence. everyone hopes to use their career or knowledge for the greater social good, and i am no different, but i have specific desires for this social good that notre dame has helped me recognize. my hope for transcendence begins with the idea that i want to be a force for good, which directly aligns with notre dame’s values as an institution. as dillard (week 13) suggests, we all have a mountain pass that we are on in life. at this point in time, i believe my mountain pass surrounds my educational pursuits at notre dame and seeing as my hope for transcendence directly aligns with notre dame’s goals, i feel as though i am in the best place i can be. more specifically, this desired idea of being a force for good is centered in helping others find truth, and i hope to do that through my major of applied and computational math and statistics. it is hard to imagine how this hope for transcendence can be properly executed, though, as it is rather abstract, but i think the answers lies in accompaniment. accompaniment is a mutually beneficial relationship that allows us to broaden our perspective on the world by “walking alongside” someone else. when having such an abstract goal as social change centered in helping others find truth, it seems best to seek accompaniment to learn from someone else who has experiences surrounding your specific goals. through that, you may even learn more about yourself and others and get a better grasp on those goals. steve reifenberg writes on the benefits of accompaniment in his life, noting that people who desperately needed his help in santiago, chile were his saviors in a severe time of need when he was ill. this relationship fostered accompaniment, and it has impacted his life desires and teachings and has become an unforgettable, life-changing experience (week 10). so, i believe accompaniment is the best possible way for me to learn something about my goals and my desires in life and to fulfill a specific hope for transcendence. while it is unclear who i might accompany, it is not a decision that needs to be made now. if i acknowledge my hope for transcendence and need for accompaniment, i have a goal for myself. my time as a first year at notre dame has inspired me and grounded me in values needed to fulfill my life goals. it is clear to me that this experience is not fully centered around education; rather, notre dame seeks to develop good people who thrive as reflective leaders with the capacity to make a difference in the world. with this, i have no doubt that i will reach my hope for transcendence, as i am privileged to be part of a community that is so special. microsoft word jpavlockintegrationiii 1 pavlock professor helm moreau fye integration iii march 3, 2022 go rest high on that mountain hello everyone, welcome to the service. i know you all may be sad, but it will only be sad for a bit longer. as jordan requested, we will be having the afterparty up at the school. but for now, i want to say a few things about my dear friend. today we stand adjacent to the poor farm cemetery, an unmarked burial ground for the poor and downtrodden of smethport way back in the early 1900s. to our right are the resting places of the deaf, blind, and insane. surrounding their graves are tens of norway spruce trees, one of jordan’s favorite trees. each day as he went to school, he would look out from the highway at this hill, and he would see the spruce trees in a big square on the hillside. for a long time, he didn’t know that there were people buried there, but he had always enjoyed the beauty of those trees. as he got older, he would take his bike into town on the railroad grade down in the valley there. each time he would look up and see these trees, he would think about how, though he never knew these folks, he could appreciate the beauty they left behind. today we stand where in fifty years or so, there will be a thriving forest. the fivehundred little eastern hemlock trees you see here will be the play area of his greatgrandchildren. they will stand tall and for a long time. there will be no marker of his grave, only these beautiful trees. when i asked him why he didn’t want a marker, he told me, “that’s not the point.” he said he didn’t want to plant the trees as a living memory. he wanted to plant the trees so that people could live and make memories within them. he told me about how much he loved the 2 pavlock spruce trees over there, even when he didn’t know that they surrounded a burial site. he said that “maybe people will know that i’m buried up in the hemlocks, or they won’t. regardless, they will look over and see the beautiful trees. they can hike through. build a fort. hunt. that’s a lot more meaningful than a stone in the ground.” jordan and i were talking one night in college, and we were discussing what it meant to live a good life. we talked about achievements, money, women. antique bottle collection size. the whole nine yards. but something he said struck me. he said that the single most crucial factor in a life well-lived is how you impact other people’s lives, regardless of what that gives you in wealth, fame, or notoriety. as sister theresa alethia noble once said, “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a skull. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week 3) however, jordan told me the secret to immortality. he said, “every time you interact with someone, you leave a little bit of yourself with them. even if they don’t remember you, by interacting with them, you have changed their life. i try to be a positive force in the lives of everyone i meet because that way, i am leaving others with a positive bit of myself. if i can make the lives of others better, and they do so for more people, and so on, i never really die, even if no one knows my name.” just like these trees will, jordan aimed to leave an impact during his life rather than leaving his name. jordan recognized that it was his relationships with others that were most important. he found fulfillment by giving to others, not only because it was right, but because they, in turn, gave happiness to his life. as eppie lederer once said in the movie hesburgh (which, by the way, is a classic), “pray for me, father, and i’ll pray for you. this way we’ll both be covered, no 3 pavlock matter what.” (“hesburgh” – eppie lederer – moreau fye week 2). jordan supported his friends, and they supported him. one time, i was at the gas station with jordan when a homeless man walked up to us and wanted money. we had already seen him walk up to several folks who quickly shuffled away from him into the store. when he came to us, jordan gave him five dollars and struck up a conversation with him for ten minutes. jordan was always doing that, talking to the folks who no one else would. when he was a senior in high school, he had this eighth-grader friend who was bullied a lot by the other kids. jordan sat with him at every football game, walked with him after school, and even kept in touch with him after high school. he knew that it looked weird for him to be hanging with a random eighth-grader, but he didn’t care. jordan realized that, as pope francis put it, “the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a “you” and themselves as part of an ‘us.’ we all need each other” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis – moreau fye week 7). jordan was always living in the moment. one of his favorite quotes was, “i encourage others to focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do or what we do not have yet.” (“5 minutes: a grotto short film” by aria swarr, quote by jihoon kim – moreau fye week 6). jordan always spent his time doing what he could and didn’t waste his life worrying about what he didn’t have. he always had the ability to do something, so something he did. 4 pavlock though he worked very hard in life (just look at his 9500-piece antique bottle collection), jordan always made time for his family. he made sure to take the kids to sports practice, remember his anniversary, and even walk the dog each evening. he liked this one story about gandhi. it went, “one day mahatma gandhi was said to have woken up and told those around him, ‘this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.’ his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. ‘i’ll have to meditate for two,’ he spelled out” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). though jordan wasn’t much of a meditation guy, he worked hard and played even harder. before he knew what he wanted to do in life, jordan had a conversation with his mom as part of a first-year experience course at notre dame. at that time, jordan struggled to grasp precisely which subject he wanted to delve into, and he told his mom that this really bothered him. she said to him that “you’re going down the right path. you just don’t know what path” (discernment conversation with my mom – moreau fye week 5). as he continued life, that reassurance from his mom stuck with him. even when times were uncertain, he knew that in the grand scheme of things, he was on the right path that god had intended for him. jordan used another bit of career advice, one he got from notre dame, but in a different way. whenever he was frustrated with something complex, like fixing his car or doing his taxes, he would say, “it’s not a one-step process.” (“navigating your career journey – moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week 4) though this was initially meant to describe the career discernment process, he used it for everything. every time he got stuck, he recognized that there were simply more steps to be taken. 5 pavlock so here we are, on this beautiful summer day, saying goodbye to our friend, father, husband, and grandfather. as per his request, everyone should take one of the white roses over by the first row of trees and place it in the grass wherever they see fit. now, finally, as he first heard sixty years ago on this very hillside during a dedication ceremony for the buried poor farm residents, a few of his family members will perform “go rest high on that mountain” by vince gill. oh, and don’t forget, the afterparty starts at six! bring your dancing shoes! final moreau integration peggy hnatusko moreau first year experience april 29, 2022 maximizing my formation at notre dame my mission in life is to perfect the virtue of love. as john says in his gospel, “god is love.” we all have a duty in life to know, love, and serve god, which is why love is the greatest virtue. i would like to perfect love for myself, others, and god by the time i leave this earth. to perfect love for myself, i must grow in perfect mortification. i must maximize my self-discipline, giving me control over every thought and action. this would allow me to perfectly respect the great body that god has gifted me. to perfect love for others, i must be genuinely kind and charitable. this means not only appearing to care about someone, but actually caring about the woes of his or her life. this means giving all my time in service to others, and not indulging in myself. to perfect love for god, i need to show how grateful i am for his generosity. i need to spend time revering him everyday, and thanking him for the grace he gives me to go on. i also need to lead others toward heaven and spread the good news of his mercy. by following these steps of growing in perfect love, i will become a soldier for christ, and i will be able to die with eternal peace (“my mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen). my first year at notre dame has been very life-changing. i was serious about my religion before coming to college, but the faith formation at notre dame has truly helped me see clearly. when i interviewed my high school friend teddy, he said that i “desired above all to be a good catholic because it is my reasoning behind most all things i do and believe” (“discernment https://docs.google.com/document/d/1a8rdxqwrvi0tbcoqztsq672ne73dy5ngsr6e9nlyorq/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit conversation activity” by university of notre dame moreau fye week five). this is still my mentality through college, but many experiences have helped me in this journey. i have met very virtuous friends at the windmoor opus dei center, and they have introduced me to many other clubs and groups of people that have shaped my time here. the sad reality of college, and life altogether, is that our time here goes very fast. in the words of sister aletheia, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). fr. pete gave a talk to my hall that reminisces this same message. he said that notre dame is meant to be left, and he compared it to jesus and the disciples. jesus, in his brief time on earth, taught the disciples what they should do, and he sent them out to spread the good news. during my short time here at notre dame, i need to engage myself in the academic and spiritual formation so that i can share it with whatever community i am a part of later in life. father theodore hesburgh said, "whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living" (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). it is my goal to fully perfect the virtue of love so that i can be ready after i leave college. i think one of the most important ways that i have to grow in love is by growing in empathy. during my first semester, i had a hard time finding the right friends, and i was pretty disappointed with how my college experience was going. however, my faith allowed me to accept all suffering with an open heart and offer it up to god. as dr. jihoon kim said, “now, i have experienced, you know, many incidents where god will answer my prayers and give me strength when i was going through a really difficult time” (“5 minutes” by aria swar moreau fye week six). like dr. kim, i respond pretty well to suffering, and i would say that i have https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ never seriously suffered. because of this i struggle to truly relate to people who are suffering, and i feel like i am lacking in empathy. in the constitution of holy cross, it says, “our concern for the dignity of every human being as god’s cherished child directs our care to victims of every injury: prejudice, famine, warfare, ignorance, infidelity, abuse, natural calamity…” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by basil moreau moreau fye week twelve). i do truly love and care about all of these people, and i hope to better relate to them. as pope francis himself said, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted moreau fye week seven). we have a duty to help every single person, which is why it is so important to grow in empathy and love. in the article about accompaniment, fr. gustavo gutiérrez said, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless. this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this further emphasizes the point that every single person has dignity and deserves to be heard. it is a goal of mine to try to help as many people as possible, especially because i have been blessed by being in such a formative place like notre dame. to do this, i need to grow in empathy saint josemaria escriva, founder of opus dei, wrote in his book “the way” about mortification, which is how we can truly detach ourselves from bodily pleasures. i think that this is the best way to grow in empathy. by making self-sacrifices, i can offer suffering up to god and then be more empathetic to people who are suffering. in pico iyer’s article about the importance of taking breaks, especially from technology, kevin kelly says, “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am” https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i think detachment from technology is an excellent example of mortification, and it is a great way to willingly offer suffering to god. as i grow in love for others, i want to address what i think is the biggest problem in our society: “the rise of secularism plaguing the young generations'' (“7 clues to help you get started with the career development process” by muerelo center for career development moreau fye week four). i feel like so many people my age are getting drawn away from religion by tantalizing secular influences. even among catholics, i think many people are not taking their faiths seriously. eitan hersh talked about the current state of politics in america, but i think it also relates to religion. he said, “it makes you feel connected to something without doing anything yourself. it makes me feel i am part of this emotional high or i am part of this sad point, this low point even though i'm not doing anything. i'm just following it” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). i feel like many people are going through the motions of being catholic, but they struggle to truly believe. in jacob walsh’ article about living his catholic faith, he wrote that a priest said to him “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). with all of the love god has shown me, i would love to help others see god in their own lives, and i think this would drastically help people in their faith journeys. to live out my mission statement in the next three years at notre dame, i need to grow in empathy and love. i can then use these virtues when i leave notre dame to be a disciple in my new community. as i wrote in my first integration, “we should devote our lives entirely to christ. we should help others on their journey to heaven, and lead others to live the same life of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/ service” (“a life well-lived is a life in christ” by moreau fye week eight). this is my goal for my whole life, but i can start by living this out in college. my first year has been very fantastic in my religious formation, and i hope to continue to grow and also make an impact in this community at notre dame. https://docs.google.com/document/d/17u_dvnzsgnbzyzyegkj74gqwevrx5e4y7vxatejxd3m/edit integration four 29 april 2022 moreau almost there, never finished in large part, i don’t believe that we should ever be individuals solely motivated by an organization outside of ourselves. though our time on earth is in fact transient, humans should not define the seemingly timeless idea of our own “mission” in terms of the temporary organizations with which we come to associate during our lifetimes. in spite of the fact that “we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham, moreau fye week 3), we must limit our mission statement with full acknowledgment of our death. just as the mission of a university is timeless and does not depend on any external bodies, so too should the personal mission statements of humans be largely independent of their surroundings. my mission statement is personal. all the same, though, humans are intrinsically products of our environments and therefore define our missions in accordance with our lived experience. my mission statement is motivated much by my upbringing and will always be so. take for example the plight of fr. greg boyle, who dedicates his life in the spirit that “sometimes you’re thrown into each other’s jurisdiction, and that feels better than living, as the buddhusts say, in the ‘illusion of separateness.’” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle, moreau fye week 7). fr. boyle has an unrelenting identity that’s rooted in the organization which he’s founded and to which he’s dedicated his life—homeboy industries. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 however, his life mission isn’t just organizational; at its core, he’s rooted himself personally in that endeavor. just the same, the organizations which i’ve come to love don’t define me. with that said, my environments have motivated me to pursue several obligations and aspirations, which include (in no particular order): taking steps to become an independent person through experience and education, always remembering and paying homage to family, maintaining (or growing into) an equanimity of mind, keeping the good of humanity at the forefront of all my professional decisions, and proceeding with a charge to enjoy life as it is. it can often be easier to define what one’s mission is not rather than what is. this tendency is not entirely undisciplined and is in fact a core of my own mission. the world presents us many forces, options, thoughts, ideas, and people that may shape and influence our mission. many of these forces will prove to be net evils or negative influences and, as such, it is my mission to discern between the many forces in life and choose which are good and which are not. life is by no means a binary experience, but the universe does have a semblance of parity to it which allows for right and wrong decisions. this is objective morality. much of my mission concerns itself with sifting through life, determining what is good, and taking on all of the perceived good. trying to identify what is and isn’t truth is also a goal of my mission for which prof. paul blaschko guides us to “be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko, moreau fye week 11.) as evidenced by the title of dr. tasha eurich’s ted.com article, there is a right and wrong way to reflect and look at our lives. as opposed to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd spending valuable time and energy toward wearing myself out with “why” questions , i’d like to “instead…ask “what am i feeling right now?”. (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich, moreau fye week 6). that’s the frame of mind that i’d like to employ within my mission state goal of finding what’s good in life in response to how i feel. my mission statement is dynamic, not static. unlike institutions, my mission statement is (and will likely always be) a temporospatial consideration. at present moment, the idea of having a permanent view on the order of the world is repulsive. i must always be at least open to changing my personal philosophy. this is not to say that i have a fragile outlook on the world—i don’t. however, it will always be important to me to consider newness. this is the pivotal difference between my mission statement and an institution’s. “i am the master of my fate, i am the captain of my soul.” william ernest henley. applying this mission statement over the next three years will be difficult. the things i’ve mentioned as being central to who i am are actually better described as things i wish to fulfill. naturally, that means i have some growing to do. i think it’s a good thing that my mission statement is a combination of things i currently practice and things i aspire to practice. for instance, the aspect of “proceeding with a charge to enjoy life as it is” is a part of my mission statement that i don’t currently embody, but one i wish to develop. predicting how this tenet will animate my next three years, i would venture to guess that, if i succeed, i will be much less stressed out by the unpredictability of my future career. in fact, if i proceed with a charge to enjoy life as it is, that would mean i would embrace the fact that there are so many unknowns left for me in life. in a https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ very big way, not knowing how my life will pan out is a blessing and can be an exciting thing. the moment that i begin to fully recognize and embrace that will be the moment i truly live to my mission statement. a very real and imminent struggle to living out my mission statement lies in the question of how i will respond to the anxiety i live with. my anxiety shapes so much of my life and almost controls me; in a way, i’m in the passenger seat of my own life. this fact won’t go away in the next three years. or thirty. i know that, and it’s something that i’ve had to accept with pain. nevertheless, there must be a real and vibrant way to proceed in spite of my anxiety. provided that “the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating that ‘stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century,’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer, moreau fye week 1), i can only estimate that my own levels of stress, depression, and anxiety will rise with time. therefore, the stated “equanimity of mind” should become an equally important component of my mission. one tangible thing that i think will be crucial to achieving this is meditation. the msca symposium abstract on the institute for wellness and wellbeing notes that “wellbeing…rests on the belief that one is doing well emotionally, socially, and psychologically.” (“msca wellness abstract” by ken kelley, moreau fye week 12), which i believe requires a very grounded and intentional practice such as meditation. the purpose of meditation is not to try and achieve a greater domain over thought and emotion. as my dad put it just a week ago, “the mind is a wild monkey”, which (to continue the metaphor) can only be tamed, not chased away. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/#summaries it would be ignorant to assume that my mission statement will always be the same, however. there are so many life-altering parts of life that i haven’t experienced which i’m sure will change the way i define the mission of my life. however, all i can do now is predict what i think the most important things in my life will be as i grow and continue to try my best to pursue those things. if, after all the years of my life, my mission statement has completely changed but my life path has also changed, i will not be disappointed in my failure to adhere to the april 29th iteration of my mission statement. after all, the only guarantee we can have in life is change, so i should expect to change with life. wilcutt 1 megan wilcutt michael comuniello moreau first-year experience 4 march 2022 the lesson of being a rock from the moment she was born, it was clear that megan was going to be a force to be reckoned with. stealing the spotlight by being born on the same day as her sister, everyone knew that the last and fourth addition to the wilcutt family was going to be one to keep an eye on. growing up in st. louis, megan proved everyone right. she constantly was a ball of energy, wanting to do everything under the sun. from trying out soccer to debate, megan had a zest for trying new things even though it was quite clear her athletic ability was never going to be a strong suit. with this energy though, megan graduated from st. peter at the top of her class and headed off to high school, following two of her sister’s and her own mother’s footsteps heading to st. joe. at st. joe, megan made even more of a stir than in grade school. there, she started making what st. joe likes to call a “profound impact in the world”. she found passions, starting a club supporting the mental health of students that persists today, founding a youth city council that was adopted into kirkwood law, and even graduating number one in her class. above all these things though, megan spent her st. joe years finding the best friends of her life. a group of six girls that have remained together throughout the years because as their class quote said, “side by side or miles apart, we are sisters connected at heart.” even when college separated them to all ends of the country, their friendship prevailed. when parting ways, megan made her way to the university of notre dame, once again following in her family’s footsteps, this time her grandfather’s. growing up, megan had visited the school countless times, at least three times a year, while visiting her grandparents. yet, the school took on a new meaning when becoming a student. megan majored in political science, with a minor in sociology, a path that absolutely suited her passions. with this degree, megan made her way to law school at georgetown university, becoming a pro bono criminal defense attorney. she always said, “everybody deserves someone in their corner.” she was that person for all of her clients and everyone in her life. she was the type of person anyone could go to for anything. she was a cheerleader when one needed inspiration and a shoulder to cry on when one needed support. despite megan’s enormous triumphs in her career and educational life, she always knew that family above all else was the single most important thing to her. megan grew up in an open door house, anybody and everybody walking in at any given time to stop by, both real family and the family that you choose, your friends. on any given day, megan would walk down the stairs and find at least two of her aunts laughing over a bottle of wine with her mom. megan adopted this policy into her own home. she fostered the relationships in her life just as she saw her parents when she was young. and just like her mom would always tell her, megan never left anybody without saying, “love you like a rock.” whenever megan said that phrase, i never quite understood it, but as we sit here today, i finally know what she meant. a rock is solid, unable to be broken. as many times as you try to break it, it will persist and stay whole. it can be leaned upon by others. megan was and will always continue to be a rock for all of us. she leaves behind this message for us to go out into the world and be that rock for somebody else. smile at the stranger on the street. stick up for those who have nobody on their side. give back to those who are not as fortunate as you. call a friend you haven’t talked to in a while. never let anyone forget you love them like a rock. my definition of a life well-lived over the course of the semester, my thoughts on a life well-lived have truly been reexamined fully and evolved into what i now believe. i came into this semester thinking of a life well-lived only in positive terms; i thought of happiness, but in general terms. while happiness is undoubtedly a part of a life well-lived, there is so much more that goes into my new definition of a life well-lived that this semester thus far has taught me. living a life well-lived is to experience both happiness and suffering. the hesburgh documentary we watched said, “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). everybody wants to go through life escaping all pain. yet, you need to experience both the highs and lows of life to fully live. the lows in life, however unpleasant, must be embraced as they reveal parts of ourselves that we otherwise would never know existed. in those moments of trying times, it might be hard to realize that suffering is part of the journey to a life well-lived. but, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). to live a life well-lived, you must remember that there is always a larger picture than the current experience you are facing. the hardships also serve to remind us that even the little things are highs. for, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by the meruelo career center moreau fye week four). during week 6, we watched a video about jihoon kim who adopted this mindset. jihoon kim was paralyzed from a snowboarding accident, yet instead of accepting a pessimistic view of life, he realized that life is not about what you can’t do but what you can. he emphasized that suffering taught him more than it ever inhibited him (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). watching him reinforced in me that we have the choice in life to how we react to things. we can face hardship and choose to be passive, let it happen to us and foster resentment against life, or we can embrace it head on, accepting the opportunity to grow and learn. this mindset i now believe is essential to living a life well-lived this outlook can be applied to both personal and professional relationships in a life-well lived. for a life well-lived, it is important to find a passion in the professional field and hone in on it. coming into notre dame, i looked around at all these talented people and saw each person already having a designated plan for their life. they knew what they wanted to do, and how to get there exactly. this made me feel like i was behind schedule, but when talking to my mom during week five, i realized i’m right where i need to be. each person’s journey to a life well-lived is different. nobody has to have their whole life planned out to continue on their journey, rather as my mom explained it’s more about what’s in their heart that matters most ("discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). above all else, this semester has taught me that “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week seven). to me, relationships are the biggest signifier of a life well-lived. before this class, my initial definition of a life well-lived centered around the traditional version of success, but now it’s shifted to having successful relationships. life is about the people you meet along the way, those who change your life and those whose lives you change. when i leave this earth, i want to be remembered for the immense love and gratitude i had for my family, friends, and even strangers on the street. these little or deep relationships constitute a life well-lived. lastly, i’ve learned that part of living a life well-lived is embracing that someday it has to end. death is always something i’ve feared, but now there is a bit of comfort associated with its inevitability. for, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). death serves as the purpose for living a life well-lived. without death, life would have no meaning. wilcutt 1 megan wilcutt michael comuniello moreau first year experience 4 march 2022 the lesson of being a rock from the moment she was born, it was clear that megan was going to be a force to be reckoned with. stealing the spotlight by being born on the same day as her sister, everyone knew that the last and fourth addition to the wilcutt family was going to be one to keep an eye on. growing up in st. louis, megan proved everyone right. she constantly was a ball of energy, wanting to do everything under the sun. from trying out soccer to debate, megan had a zest for trying new things even though it was quite clear her athletic ability was never going t o be a strong suit. with this energy though, megan graduated from st. peter at the top of her class and headed off to high school, following two of her sister’s and her own mother’s footsteps heading to st. joe. at st. joe, megan made even more of a stir than in grade school. there, she started making what st. joe likes to call a “profound impact in the world”. she found passions, starting a club supporting the mental health of students that persists today, founding a youth city council that was adopted in to kirkwood law, and even graduating number one in her class. above all these things though, megan spent her st. joe years finding the best friends of her life. a group of six girls that have remained together throughout the years because as their class qu ote said, “side by side or miles apart, we are sisters connected at heart.” even when college separated them to all ends of the country, their friendship prevailed. wilcutt 1 megan wilcutt michael comuniello moreau first-year experience 4 march 2022 the lesson of being a rock from the moment she was born, it was clear that megan was going to be a force to be reckoned with. stealing the spotlight by being born on the same day as her sister, everyone knew that the last and fourth addition to the wilcutt family was going to be one to keep an eye on. growing up in st. louis, megan proved everyone right. she constantly was a ball of energy, wanting to do everything under the sun. from trying out soccer to debate, megan had a zest for trying new things even though it was quite clear her athletic ability was never going to be a strong suit. with this energy though, megan graduated from st. peter at the top of her class and headed off to high school, following two of her sister’s and her own mother’s footsteps heading to st. joe. at st. joe, megan made even more of a stir than in grade school. there, she started making what st. joe likes to call a “profound impact in the world”. she found passions, starting a club supporting the mental health of students that persists today, founding a youth city council that was adopted into kirkwood law, and even graduating number one in her class. above all these things though, megan spent her st. joe years finding the best friends of her life. a group of six girls that have remained together throughout the years because as their class quote said, “side by side or miles apart, we are sisters connected at heart.” even when college separated them to all ends of the country, their friendship prevailed. capstone integration professor nguyen moreau fye capstone integration 29 april 2022 personal statement to a life well-lived revised personal statement: i, , will be appreciative of every gift that appears in my life, no matter how big or small. the gift that i will act on the most in my future at notre dame will be my family, who i am fortunate enough to see on a weekly basis, something that not a lot of others have. moreover, i will work hard in the gift of employment that i have at notre dame, as i believe that it will lead me to a more successful and happy career path. i must take advantage of every opportunity that presents itself. during my time at notre dame, i have found myself in stressful times of heaps of schoolwork, as well as overwhelming situations with my friends. i have found the importance of reducing stress, and making sure to take breaks when necessary. this stems from an article that emphasizes that breaks are important in a work culture, “because workers find unclogging their minds’ arteries to be so exhilarating.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) this will be vital in my next three years at notre dame, as i will be able to cool myself down, and not get overwhelmed during these times. i have found the most relaxing times in college to be the ones where i’m with my friends and with my dorm mates, regardless of what we’re doing. i will be more productive if i take the time to de-stress and relax, which i apply a lot in the future. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ another crucial part of my good life at notre dame is the relationships that i have with others. i haven’t had much trouble having a personal conversation with anyone here, which in turn leads me to joy, because everyone here is so kind and makes me feel loved. if i ever were to sense tension between myself and someone else, i would reflect on father ted hesburgh and his ideologies. he believed in resolving conflicts with others, no matter how large. for example, a resonating quote from him is: “we may have had our disagreements, but at the end of the day, we were all fishermen.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) at notre dame, i should seek peace, just as fr. ted did, because any two diverse groups of people can be brought together. this will contribute to the more unified and inclusive campus at notre dame, which i enjoyed in my first year, especially when i was able to hear from new perspectives in my moreau class. looking to the future, i need to struggle with the hard ideas first. this comes from an interesting quote from a new york times article, which says, “‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) i often find that if i choose to ignore the difficult tasks of life, such as death, i can’t have a truly happy and worry-free experience in the other facets of my life. i have applied this in my schoolwork in the last couple of weeks, where i do the difficult and daunting assignments first, while doing the “easier” things last. i have experienced a much more stress-less experience in my life overall, as realizing i have the difficult things done takes a lot of worry off my shoulders. one extremely important facet of my life is my interest in work and what i will do post-graduation. through the center for career development survey, i was able to reflect on https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html what dream jobs i would like to pursue. i described my interest in sports media and broadcasting, which i have been able to do in my first year at notre dame. through fighting irish media, i have been able to call games on television that anyone can see, which brings me a sense of joy that i have not felt before. i have realized that in order to live a good life, i should continue this career path and doing what i love for work. if i do this in the next three years of my life at notre dame, i truly believe my life will become more animated and “good”. personally, a good life consists of a healthy relationship with my family, and to be able to speak with them frequently. i have a unique situation, where my brother attends notre dame with me, and my parents live literal feet away from campus. through having a conversation with my brother, i have realized what brings me the most joy. jack said, “i think that you value family and friends first. you’ve always been very social with people around you, and are good at making conversation.” (discernment conversation activity by jack bailey moreau fye week five) therefore, i realized that i should remain close with my family in the next three years of my college experience, as it brings me pure joy. one of the most calming experiences at notre dame is going to the grotto during times of trouble in school and in my social life. this was verbalized perfectly in dr. jihoon kim’s grotto story, where he says, “but at the same time, the purpose of my life is not simply about overcoming suffering, suffering is a part of our lives, it is always there. but it is about how to respond to suffering with god.” (“why does god allow suffering?” by aria swarr moreau fye week six) i will apply this well to my future at notre dame, as i will incorporate god into everything i do. finally, i will realize that i can’t fight battles on my own, and that i have god as a source of strength and motivation. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 in the future, i will be more grateful for every day that i have at this phenomenal university. i need to see life as a gift, even during rough times. i reflected on this in week seven, where i was asked, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven) in order to make myself happier, as well as those around me, i need to cherish every moment that i have at school, whether good or bad. i will be much more outgoing in the future, with the goal of improving everyone’s mood around campus. i anticipate that i will be working with communities outside of campus much more often in the next three years, particularly with local groups in south bend. a quote from this semester changed the way that i will approach these service opportunities, where steve reifenberg said, “‘the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard.’” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) this will change the way that i approach the idea of charity and helping those in need. today, it seems that people help others in order to make themselves feel better about their work, and not with the intentions of helping others. i will combat this in my future years at notre dame, especially when working with others in the south bend community. it was very interesting to hear how the university views themselves in regards to inclusion and diversity. they describe how “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame flows from our character as a community of scholarship, teaching, learning and service founded upon jesus christ.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week ten) this motivated me to be a key contributor of diversity and inclusion at notre dame. i can do so by reaching out to everyone that i see, and try to meet someone new every day https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ during my college career. i would be able to learn so much about different backgrounds of those at notre dame, and get a more well-rounded perspective of the world. one danger that was presented to me in this semester was the danger from echo chambers and filter bubbles. i was informed of how to break myself out of an echo chamber if i ever find myself in one. i was told, “first, we should be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to. seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments. secondly, though, we need to keep an eye on our own motives.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) i found this to be very applicable to my time at notre dame, where i now have the tools to break the strong wall of misinformation. this will allow our campus community to be much more realistic, as dangerous echo chambers twist reality and essentially “hide” the truth that they don’t agree with. during a time of american history filled with racial injustices and inequality, there has been a massive call to action. i believe that notre dame students are best-equipped to respond to this call in society. dean g. marcus cole discussed how to use a notre dame education to help the world well, where he said, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) this transformed the way that i will act as a member of society in the future, but also as a notre dame student. i will respond to pressing issues in society, and will be a part of the large movement in order to bring equality to all demographics of america. finally, it was intriguing to see how my personal statement had potentially changed over the last couple of weeks, especially after this integration. in my initial version, i discussed the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ importance that family had to me. this motivated me to be with my family more as summer break moves in, and to be more appreciative of them more often. this point was hammered home for me after writing the revised personal statement. moreover, i talk about my work and how that is a large part of “feeling successful”. if i work hard in my job now, and eventually are able to get a job in the future that i’m happy with, i will feel successful, and not want much more. this remained true in my new personal statement, which emphasizes the place that work has on my life. i will embrace the areas of my life that bring me true joy in the next three years of my notre dame experience, and will make sure that i’m appreciative of every gift that i have currently. integration three integration three moreau first-year experience pedro augusto leone bolsonaro looking forward: a life well-lived as i traverse through university and slowly find my path in the so-called “real-life world”, the more i ponder over what a life well-lived looks like. at the same time, however, thinking about the future, and all the uncertainty tied to it, provokes an excruciating feeling of anxiety fused with being out of control. in fact, thinking about the future too much can actually be counterproductive, as i have come to realize after a couple sleep-troubled nights. as french philosopher blaise pascal famously noted “all the happiness of men [...] arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber.” (“why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). regardless, based on the conception of life that i have molded throughout my twenty years of life, i can confidently draw conclusions on what a life well-lived, particularly in an academic, professional and personal sense, would look like for me. if i told you i knew exactly what i wanted to study when i was filling out the application for notre dame, i would be lying. to be honest, when i punched in ‘finance’ into the intended major textbox, my motivation behind it was mostly being able to secure a well paying job after college to make up for the pricey tuition my family committed itself to covering. at the time, i could not tell you what a hedge fund was or what investment bankers do (i still am a bit unsure on the latter). but after enrolling in fundamentals of finance last semester and familiarizing myself with the vast variety of ventures within the world of finance, the prospect of studying finance became much less a daunting and necessary evil for financial stability, but an engrossing challenge to master and delve deep into the understanding of capital. inspired by my professor, who recurrently reminded students of the great possibilities of leveraging your finance expertise to the service of others, i have come to understand that studying finance allows me to produce positive change in the world, particularly through the sharing of financial education. the academic branch of a well lived-life, in my eyes, will solely be fulfilled if i consider how i can leverage that learning into the benefit of those in need. i look up to fr. hesburgh as a role-model in this sense; as his documentary suggests, “fr. hesburgh recognized that he had a duty to serve and give back.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca & christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2). that is also why i am pursuing a complementary degree in global affairs. raised in a privileged household amid a society plagued with inequality and having the opportunity to study in one of the best institutions in the world, i believe it is my responsibility to look outwards into regions of economic backwardness and empower its citizens to reach an acceptable condition of living. having this globalized outreach will be crucial to study the social fabric of countries that suffer with poverty and inequality and appraise the best way to revert their fortunes. mailto:pleonebo@nd.edu https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjbb%2biweix%2fsut3xllao1iaxbatiks7uaf92bfkjfowsdyux2nh368dvb5u%2b2rrnmfnfdoekoxai%2ba92%2bt7eo6bxlbctnlwzkla5em6lpe4dkdzjknzyaswhgkqcvgm8iphwsnyuqinli1ifiyjelhqcli7x4rtniyzmb5tklxkhriluzhlf1mw8c5ks3dw7p0zjdjhg5orbijoei6n4b1wl8pr7orpgp2frnawnvkjcbhnobwpsdaedur5blw9rvobbjxziuqdeqt%2bo63hjdvlt7ilgokvksi%2f%2blepltqssf2ldkp0bsp6qwvkuis0dypharge366exxpvpynezwzthuwf9yyfcykwa8c1auo7sguwl6qgh%2fvvj9lh%2bmip5kcj3icigjtexu7%2b3ahxitbf4u7psji5sudytzreeuk%2fpznvkgw2gbrferf2i%2f5nuxwhybp%2fit3hx0wujkbc%2bd7losrw1adg3rb4em1boj9uz3s%2fbt67yl5%2ft9k%2f&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=ordp%2fm6oqltxks8snf2vs5c4qr%2bj0ta4b0f7d%2bxf3sv1vntnsocobun45zotxtxgpqqfdoi6adhfeuxi%2f3dlpn4uqwzdya6fynsr9ymfoci%2fm2sf3od3nmkgpuyurki29f%2bcxliz2qxbtphsnz77yljhcqc%2bj9fp0sozeczgfrdhimbcqaqipleaqdv2fmxilapyw4d54pmiocab2qv%2f0adpqu1xfrilknhb56fa7ppvegpw0suhzxorpoxlwktmp%2f9smgn6xiyf%2bk7011haqruiim4mioxueanhpgemtjmdnu7hxqtx2bysulczrabsb9g0eegrbi16tws%2fhu67iq%3d%3d it has recently become a buzz-phrase at universities across the united states that whatever major you pick does not determine what professional area you will eventually head down. in truth, as the meruelo career for career development suggests, “ [...] you can relax and put aside the thought that you are deciding your career path when picking your major.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development – moreau fye week 4). at the same time, however, it is also true that your major is the first factor that gravitates you towards a specific industry or at least sector of the job market. therefore, it became apparent that the considerations i made towards my major often outpoured into what a well-lived professional career would look like. well, the answer to that question, like many others throughout this paper, is foggy at best. what i can say with certainty is that regardless of what path i opt to tread down, the morals and values that i have cultivated first within my household and now at notre dame, will always take precedence. to have a well-lived professional career is first and foremost to have a dignified career. with that being said, i also know that a well-lived career is shaped by excellence and professionalism, in whatever field i venture into, i will perpetually strive to accumulate knowledge that empowers me to be constantly growing within that field. in this sense, i look up to my grandfather, who constructed an exemplary career at gas company esso. starting as a trainee at the company, he immersed himself in the industry, knowing leaders of his field and connecting with fellow professionals in his firm, allowing him to move up the ranks and materialize a dream he had as a young boy. although possible, i know that this sort of incessant motivation is extremely difficult to fabricate if you find no interest in your profession, which is why i am so determined in choosing a career area which i find joy in waking up every morning and pursuing with intent and excitement. as fr. micheal himes advises, “one of the best ways to get into the way a person thinks [...] is to ask the questions, “what are your obsessions? what are the things you can’t leave alone?” (“three key questions” by fr. micheal himes – moreau fye week 3). i have come back to these questions time and time again but i still cannot put a finger on what the answer to them might be. something i have learned at notre dame is that simply learning the theoretical side of any area is simply not enough – to truly discern what career path you will find yourself in you must venture into the professional world and see what a professional in that area does in his day-to-day life. that is why this coming summer, with help of the very meruelo center for career development, i have applied to various internships with the hope of getting hands-on experience in the job market which will assist in determining what path my heart will eventually set on. finally, and most importantly, i must look ahead and envision what a personal life well-lived looks like for me. in my eyes, the academic and professional considerations i have laid so far are important insofar as they enable me to fulfill my personal goals of fostering valuable and positive friendships and raising a strong and loving family. in terms of friendships, i have been fortunate in growing up in an environment where those around me, for the very most part, were kind-hearted and well-intentioned. regardless, there were some instances where some https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/468567?module_item_id=144085 ‘friendships’ proved nothing but to be toxic relationships that aggregated nothing but negativity into my life. when we are surrounded by such people, we tend to feel a sense of voidness and sorrowness, especially in difficult times where we need the support of our closest friends the most. i felt a resemblance to what professor jd kim said in his video, “when hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have.” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week 6). to avoid/minimize such cases, i have practiced a very important skill called “cutting off”, where you gradually and systematically ensure you lose contact with that person so that the negative impact they exert in your life is neutralized. before your friendships, however, the most important aspect of a life well-lived is your family. at twenty-years-old, i am absolutely certain that the family i construct will be the cornerstone of my life. as pope francis said in his ted talk, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component.” (“why the only future worth building involves everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week 7). this quote, different from most, i interpret from a familial standpoint, where each single component is a person in your family, who your love is boundless for, yet true happiness is achieved when you achieve a harmony between all the components. in conclusion, i believe that a life well-lived must be a balance of academic interests, professional aspirations, and personal desires. the sacrifice of one in benefit of the other does nothing but unbalance the harmony that exists between these three spheres. i also know that the insights i have today might be entirely different from ones i will have in 5, 10 and 50 years into the future. but i know that the only way of finding out is taking life head-on and courageously navigating its uncertainty so that when you lay on your deathbed you can look back and reminisce about your life well-lived. https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript integration pawelek 1 moreau 24 february 2022 a life well-lived, featuring kind, courageous, and loyal. these are all traits that are associated with . a woman that passed away this past week. we now come to celebrate her life in a way she would want it to be. family and friends would say that her purpose in life was to serve her community. she often said the phrase “woman for others,” as she hoped to be associated with this montra when she passed. i believe that it is clear to see that, after reflecting on her life, this was in fact fulfilled. sophie defined a life well-lived by key terms. these key terms were the terms used to describe her at the beginning of this eulogy. she spent her days living courageously, while staying kind and loyal to those around her. one way in which sophie lived a life well-lived is by focusing on the little things in life. she took the time to focus on the important things, and let the little things in life not get to her. she often referenced “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). she said it goes to show the necessity of taking a pause and not rushing. she tried to reflect this into her life day in and day out. she knew that she would get caught up with her everyday life in the smallest of things, that in the long run will not affect her, but she still can’t let them go. this has a lot to do with platforms such as social media. however, she tried to be better about slowing down her life and taking time for herself and some of the thshe found that balance well. she radiated this balance to pawelek 2 those around her, which made others yearn to find it like she did, and today we honor her for that. in a similar sense, sophie knew that not everything was going to be good and happy all the time. she knew that there would be trials and tribulations that temporarily stunted her growth. she read to me once “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith but in the end you find strength” (“hesburgh” film by barca and o’malley moreau fye week 2). with growth comes suffering, but her philosophy was that the suffering will only expedite the growth and build a good basis of character within yourself. she thought this was well reflected in the quote by father hesburgh, because to fall back on your faith when you are suffering is necessary too. sophie held faith close to her heart and centered herself around her faith to live a good life. it grounded her. she deemed it essential to focus on god and pray when she was suffering, and somehow this helped calm and center her life. she also believed that suffering made the good parts of life so much sweeter. she had the ability to turn any negative into a positive. this is what people admired the most about sophie. she was a light on the dark days, and this didn’t go unshown. she wanted to live a good life, and one way of doing this was by spreading positivity in the darkness. while i’m approaching the middle of this eulogy, i’d like to pause and reassure everyone that this doesn’t have to be a sad event. sophie was prepared for this. not only because she knew she lived a life well-lived, but because the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). although there is a stigma around death, it is people like this nun who emphasize the importance pawelek 3 of recognizing death and the inevitability of death who raise awareness. sophie was very aware of this. ultimately, she thought this would positively impact the earth, which was her goal. the first thing that comes to my mind when i think about death is “if this was your last day on earth how would you live it?” this is because sophie would say this over and over again. she wanted everyone to live their days to the fullest because no one truly knows when it is their time to go. furthermore, she thought she could change everyone’s lives for the better by utilizing this and creating joy for themselves and for others. she was very successful in this. sophie never wasted any moment on the earth. although she may not have known what she wanted to do in the early stages of her life, she utilized every tool in order to push herself even further. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo moreau fye week 4). she knew that with exploration came excellence. she kept all of this in mind come the time she was to discern what it was she wanted to do. she knew that self-reflection is essential for the coming years and we must all personally reevaluate our lives to fulfill our passions and her passion was to be a woman for others in a life well-lived. in a similar sense, sophie utilized her surroundings to the best of her abilities in order to make the best version of herself. while she studied at the university of notre dame, she used the irishcompass (irish compass moreau fye week 5) system. this networked herself with surrounding alumni. she focused heavily on those who went into fields of study including service. this was extremely beneficial. it showed that she was a lifelong learner, which is a necessary characteristic of someone who lives a life well-lived. it is widely acknowledged that the community runs deeper at notre dame and sophie thought that this extended to the networking, which she was very successful in. pawelek 4 finally, i think it should be emphasized again how self-aware sophie was. she often brought up “i’ve come to believe that the qualities most critical for success in today’s world — including emotional intelligence, empathy, influence, persuasion, communication and collaboration — all stem from self-awareness.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). especially in today’s day and age, it is very common to get caught up in technology. we get wrapped into elements of social media and we lose ourselves. although sophie was very aware of this, she would admit that there were many times that she caught herself getting into a negative place with herself and her overall self-worth because of what she saw on social media. yet she always came out of this even better than before because she realized that we must take a moment to reflect on ourselves in everyday life. our lives are, undoubtedly, very busy, but we must carve out time to reflect on us and the world around us, and this will ultimately benefit everyone’s future. i think thai avidly plays a role in the personality traits of sophie, a compassionate woman. when i think of a person that lived a life well-lived, i think of , because i think this increasingly reigns true through all of the positive characteristics she shined out toward the world. she will be missed. week 14 capstone integration 4/23/22 a revision on my final essay for god and the good life how do i pursue a life well-lived? this question is what i must attempt to answer within this piece, and it is the foundational question of god and the good life, which i took earlier this year. during this course, we answered this question in our final essay. in this essay, i explained my idea of a life well-lived through the use of philosophical terms and reasoning while answering a list of specific questions. these questions included topics like “what role does morality play in the good life?” and “is service required for one’s life to be meaningful?” although these questions relate important ideas like morality and service to a well-lived life, they are also limiting in their requirements. therefore, in this piece, i hope to expand upon my definition of a well-lived life by discussing aspects of life like my family and career, which weren’t included before. one of the most important things for me when defining a life well-lived is my relationships with others. within the last two years, i’ve noticed the importance of relationships within my life. during my senior year of high school, one of my relationships became toxic, and i realized the importance of surrounding myself with friends that truly care about me. before coming to college, i didn’t think that i’d be homesick, but as the weeks passed, i grew to miss my family more and more. now, i call my parents multiple times a week. sometimes we talk about important things in my life like a test or project, and other times i just ask how their day was at work. many times i’ll call while they’re at dinner, so i can catch my aunt, uncle, sister, or grandparents on the other side of the phone as well. connecting with friends is something that i’ve been working on this semester as i realized that i hadn’t been maintaining many of these relationships. because of this, i’ve been reaching back out to others in an attempt to reconnect. i’ve also tried to create relationships with new people. during the documentary on father hesburgh, one of the speakers described father hesburgh, saying “that the latin word for priest. it was ‘pontifex,’ bridge builder. ted was a bridge builder between people and god and among people” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). similarly to father hesburgh, i want to build bridges because i believe that strong relationships are integral to my definition of a life well-lived. a person can also form relationships with those that he or she helps through service. during high school, i worked for a community center called beacon place, which served as a place of additional education for local students. as i volunteered there over the years, i noticed as more people joined the organization and it grew in its ability to help others. this relates to a line from the week seven moreau video when pope francis said that “and then there will be another "you," and another "you," and it turns into an "us”” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). as the organization grew in scale, it was able to improve its community programs by offering education through high school instead of stopping at the sixth grade level and by throwing events like the halloween party. in this way, by creating this “us,” we were better able to accompany the people that we served. “accompaniment is a path to help waken those dormant dreams. with respect and intelligence, humbly and without arrogance -with humble confidence or confident humility -we can be ambitious for making meaningful change” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). during my final year at beacon place, they launched a program that “woke the dormant dreams” of many of their students. this was a college counseling program. within a community where a majority of students don’t attend college, this was a huge step forward, and within the first year, they had already helped multiple students get into universities of which many were the first in their entire family. by fostering relationships whether it be friends, family, or service-oriented, a person learns about what matters to them while also experiencing the joy that these relationships bring. during my life well-lived, i hope that i can grow to better deal with stressors and nurture a healthy mind. many times i find it difficult to live in the moment due to the vast amount of https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit things that occur almost everyday. a quote from the first week of moreau says “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). there seems like there is always new information that requires one’s attention to the point that it becomes overwhelming. this often leads to stress. because of this, i’ve found it to be very important to just stop sometimes and breathe, especially during times like finals week when so many different things are all happening and all of them require one’s full attention. in addition to the sheer amount of things that require one’s attention, the need to succeed is there as well. many times during high school and during college, i have found myself stressing out about an important assignment because i must do well on it; however, recently, i’ve tried to take a calmer approach and instead focus on doing my best without obsessing over the outcome. during the sixth week of moreau, dr. kim says “so i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). by not obsessing over the outcome, i am able to be much calmer while still performing just as well. in the situation where the outcome isn’t ideal, there will always be new opportunities like the ones that dr. kim realized; however, this doesn’t mean that i’ve completely given into the flow of life. i still have a future plan in mind and care about my performance in school and extracurricular activities but am now trying to do this in a healthier way. although there are still moments when i will be stressed out and worried, i have better control of these situations and am able to respond to them in a healthy way. another important aspect of my life well-lived is one’s career. when talking about my career in my mission statement, i wrote that “i’ll be honest when i say that this is something that https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 i haven’t figured out yet, and although i have a rough idea, the picture is not clear yet” (“week 13 developing a mission” by moreau fye week thirteen). finding a career that brings one’s life meaning and enjoyment is very important, and this process starts with being open to new ideas and experiences. during my career discernment activity, when i asked my mother what difficult thing i needed to hear, she said that “i need to get out of my comfort zone and expand my horizons” (“week 5 reflection discernment conversation activity” by moreau fye week five). although leaving my comfort zone isn’t something that i enjoy doing, being open to foreign experiences allows me to find new things that bring my life meaning or enjoyment. through the act of trying new things, i want to find a career that is integral to my life well-lived. i also want a career that engages my curiosity and is fascinating. during the third week of moreau, father michael himes says that “questions, concerns, issues that you return to over and over again because they fascinate you, they excite you, they really intrigue you, they lure you on, they get you to ask more and more questions. what are your obsessions? where do you ask more and more questions? this is a very good indication that this is where your joy lies! spend your life in this way” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). i want a job that leads me to ask questions and grow in my knowledge of the world. i hope that my career can guide my curiosity to new, exciting topics. in this way, my career acts as a source of continued learning. one of the week four moreau materials states that “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). by being open to new experiences and exploring possible career paths, i hope that i am able to find a career that allows me to continue to be curious and live a well-lived life. finally, an important aspect of my life well-lived is learning, and this includes learning about other cultures and perspectives. one can learn about different cultures and perspectives https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tibdssfqn186ec7ixexcirgpdkrgvwgo0b1xzqporde/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1tibdssfqn186ec7ixexcirgpdkrgvwgo0b1xzqporde/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vxok5n7z4a5iqmc7gik2rzoj2lgrldbw8jxxmklga_a/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vxok5n7z4a5iqmc7gik2rzoj2lgrldbw8jxxmklga_a/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40306/files/475736?module_item_id=149263 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ within the classroom through lectures; however, an equally effective way is by interacting with others who have diverse backgrounds. this is why diversity is important on a college campus. diversity of individuals allows someone to learn about peoples and cultures that are very different from one’s own, which offers moments of learning and personal growth. robin diangelo tries to stress the importance of diversity through the example of the beliefs of someone who is opposed to it. she writes that “we lose nothing of value by having no cross-racial relationships. in fact, the whiter our schools and neighborhoods are, the more likely they are to be seen as “good”” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). although i didn’t understand her meaning behind this quote originally in my qqc, i now realize that she is showing the absurdity of this statement. she is challenging the idea that a monoculture is better than a diverse mix of cultures. a diversity of cultures is important as it does provide value to one’s life and their own understanding of the world around them; however, racial injustices still occur to this very day. dean g. marcus cole writes “and in a very real sense, like many other african-american men, i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something. i must do something” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). this quote is exceptionally powerful due to dean cole’s own experience with racial injustice. having been a witness to his own father being beaten by racist assailants, the crimes committed against george flloyd and ahmaud arbery must have been emotionally hard and probably frustrating for dean cole to learn about. in response to these events, he calls others to work to fix injustices and improve the world for people of all backgrounds. similarly to how i want to accompany those through service and in my relationships, i hope to accompany those who deal with injustices in order to make the world a more accepting place. diversity of beliefs is also integral to my life well-lived. professor blaschko says that “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s blaschko moreau fye week eleven). within the last couple years, i have heard much more about the use of information to polarize people, mostly when it comes to social media. social media algorithms recommend topics and articles based on what a person reads or spends time on when using the app. because of this, if a user likes to read cnn, then this user will receive more cnn articles in their feed. this effect continues until the user only receives articles from cnn or publishers with similar articles. this happens on both sides of the political spectrum. if i were to substitute fox news in for my example, then nothing other than the names and political orientation of the news sources would change. by recommending similar things, these websites inadvertently create a bubble where a person only receives information in support of one side. this isn’t the worst case as long as the user continues to be open to listening to the other side, escaping their bubble; however, all too often, this effect leads people to become intolerant of other beliefs, leading to an echo chamber like professor blaschko says above. diversity of beliefs is very important as it allows others to learn about new perspectives and to work with those that don’t agree with them. being willing to listen to opposing viewpoints forms a nuanced understanding of different situations and worldviews. this nuanced understanding of the world is important for my version of a life well-lived and is one of the goals of higher education. after refining my understanding of my life well-lived, i know how i would revise my final essay for god and the good life. i would write about how morality requires one to be inclusive of others whose cultures and backgrounds may differ and that creating an accepting world is important so that everyone can live a good life. i would say that service is both important and meaningful as it allows one to form relationships with others while helping to improve their lives. i also would include in my conclusion about how these actions are necessary for a well-lived life while also looking inside in order to maintain a healthy mind and mental state. my restated personal mission statement is this. i want to maintain my current relationships while creating new ones, to help others through service, to stay curious and try new things, to find a career that excites me and allows me to engage my interests, to learn from those with diverse backgrounds and perspectives, and to make the world a more accepting place for all people. by doing these things, i will pursue a life well-lived. brendan mcginn week 14 integration 4/29/2022 what it means to be brendan mcginn recently, i had to write what my personal mission statement would be for a life well lived. i honestly had no idea where to start, but i had a general idea: i want to follow my passions in a way that uplifts humanity, both on large and small scales. my original attempt articulates this, but as i have reflected on my time in moreau this semester, i can see more concrete examples of how i can do this. i understand that in my future i want to start a company that solves problems i believe in. i want to be able to use science to tackle climate change and internships or summer programs to help divert teenagers from violence in cities. but in order to get to these goals, i have to learn to take one step at a time. living a good life requires direction. i always strive for perfection, as it gets me closer to my goals in life. particularly at the beginning of the semester, i was obsessed with trying to ensure i was perfecting my craft, both academically and in the boxing ring. however, i was losing sight of how to truly get better, and instead, just blaming myself when i failed. i eventually learned to think to myself differently and get better results ("the right way to be introspective (yes there's a wrong way)" by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). just asking “what” was going wrong wasn’t enough, i needed to know “why”. i learned that i was rushing through my days, trying to be too perfect rather than being appreciative of the life i was living. when i looked at pico iyer's tedtalk, i realized that maybe taking a day to reset and appreciate what i have accomplished is not such a bad thing("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i saw things more clearly after that, and realized that experiences are just as important as grades in reaching my potential. i made a goal to myself that i will never get too caught up in life that i will lose sight of myself and lose my purpose for menial things. when i learned to examine myself more, i originally saw that not everything i did was a major event. i am just one man, one college student. this was around the same time i was fundraising for the boxing club. for a while, i questioned what the point was, what could my measly five hundred dollars raised really contribute to this cause. watching the hesburgh movie changed this, though. father ted exemplifies how a simple man consumed by passion can make all the difference in the world ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). to me, this means my goals are still worthwhile. though they may be lofty, i truly believe in them and foster a passion necessary for success. therefore, i will never see myself as too small to make a meaningful change in this world. after the first few weeks into the semester, i was starting to feel settled in. i was performing well in school and socially, and had an outline of my future. however, i was not pushing myself, since any real greatness would come after i graduated. i was comfortable not pushing myself. then, i read about a nun who focused on death ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). it was definitely a shock to my system, but totally necessary. i decided that i would push myself to greatness at that moment. for me, that meant throwing myself into boxing. i may have been a novice, but i worked to become a champion. when i lost, it definitely stung. but being aware of my possible death at any time, i appreciated knowing what it was like to crave and work for victory, and even the humbleness of defeat. i decided that i would apply this to what i had learned before. in order to make the meaningful change, i would have to take a step back and see if i was being not only hyper-critical, but also complacent. as i was beginning to get a sense of who i was and who i wanted to be, i started to talk to some of my senior friends. they all had struggled with similar questions when they were in my position. now, though, they were getting ready to pursue their careers and make a life for themselves. i have always known the field i am interested in, but never any specific about what, where, or when. i had a lot of options and no general direction, until i started to ask questions of myself ("navigating your career path" by mfccd moreau fye week 4). in a conversation with my father over this issue, he told me to think on what i liked about school, which has always been the relationships ("discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week 5). i decided to try to reach out to some older friends with experience in different fields, bui i realized that only i can tell what i want, so i needed to examine myself a little more. i understand that this is an ongoing process where i have to experience a myriad of different options. however, in that moment, i made a promise to myself that i will never lie to myself about what i want. i will explore and try new things until i get to my eventual goal, if that is still my goal down the road. at the end of my first few weeks back at notre dame, i had my set of friends pretty set. i had the guys in my section of o’neill that i spent most of my time with. i didn’t really feel the need to branch out. however, they are all fairly similar to me, so i was just continuing living the same way i always had. i was not learning about new people. i decided i would branch out to someone in my dorm that was pretty quiet and did not want to hang out with many people. it was definitely difficult at first, since conversations often were pretty one sided and slightly awkward. there were some points where i felt like he really did not want to be my friend. but by pushing through these moments, we got to be really great friends ("tattoos on the heart" by father boyle moreau fye week 7). as we got closer, he opened up a little more. i learned how it had been difficult for him as one of the very few african-americans in his small high school, and how even in the dorm, he felt like an outsider ("why it is so hard to talk to white people about racism" by dr. robin deangelo moreau fye week 10) at that moment, i really was not sure what to do or say. i went to a rather large high school, but now that i look back at it, our diversity was definitely lacking. it was never something that had crossed my mind, but i could see how that could be incredibly difficult. i decided i would help my new friend by simply being there and doing what i could. i understood i would never truly understand his situation, but anytime he wanted to talk about it, i would be there to accompany him by trying to empathize and listen ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together"by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i learned it was important in my life to seek new relationships and perspectives, as well as support anyone i meet in all types of struggles they could be facing. i will always embrace my responsibility to help all those i can, and accompany them through their struggles. as i started to broaden my horizons, i heard from a multitude of people. mostly. all of my friends agreed on things, but there was one thing that people just could not agree on. that one thing was the role of religion in their lives. personally, i had lived in a catholic household for all my life, so religion has always played a massive role in my life. all my life, i had heard how important religion needs to be in my life. then, through the first semester, i mostly really knew people that also were solid in their faith. in the second semester, though, i learned a few friends did not share my same beliefs. to my surprise, they were not different, like everyone had always told me they would be. in fact, i had no idea they did not believe the same things for several months. it shattered the little echo-chamber i had been stuck in for my entire life (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blasco moreau fye week 11). i learned that this fundamental difference between us does not make us fundamentally different. from that point forward, i know i need to be a little more courageous in expanding my circle. i decided to go to clubs that could help me further perspective, like cs for good. through this club, i could both follow my passion and learn about people in the south bend area i may not previously have wanted to meet.i came to notre dame because i thought it would be comfortable, since it was an irish-catholic school, which i have been used to for most of my life. luckily for me, it is way more than that. as i consciously expand my circle, i grow my courage to meet, learn, and act ("i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.”-by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). in my life, i will strive to break out of narrow viewpoints and meet as many different and unique people as time allows. the semester seemed to have come and gone, and i experienced a great many things. i was challenged academically for one of the first times of my life, i trained for victory in bengal bouts (though i ultimately came short), i met hoards of new people, and i got to think of what is next for my life. these experiences and lessons were a lot to digest. i really did not know what to make of them or if they were going to affect my life at all. i was ready to just keep living without a real plan, but i was told to write a mission statement. i used this mission statement as a way to write what living my best possible life meant (university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week 13). i learned that in my life, there were a few promises that i could not break. i will be introspective, i will be passionate and confident in myself, i will be ambitious, i will be adventurous, i will be open-minded, and, most importantly, i will strive to serve others. this is the foundation of my mission. i believe my faith will hold me accountable and my family will help me when i fall. through these attributes, i hope to live what i believe to be my dream of creating a company and helping humanity with it. the next three years at notre dame will make all the difference in the world. with my remaining time at this university, i hope to entrench myself in these goals. by being introspective, i will be able to navigate difficult courses without losing myself in the stress or failure. i will be able to focus on what is important, such as faith and family, instead of ignoring them for simple grades. by being passionate and confident, i hope to be able to raise the ranks in certain clubs, such as bengal bouts and cs for good, so i can help younger students learn they can be a part of the change, just as the current seniors have taught me. by being ambitious, i will challenge myself to become the best version of myself as a friend, student, and person. i can do this by taking difficult tasks, or leaving my comfort zone to meet new people. by being adventurous, i will find what i love in life. i can do this by finding internships in fields or places i would have written off and studying abroad. maybe one of these places or careers will feel like home to me, but i can never know until i try it. by being open-minded, i will have gained more perspective, which will make me a more complete human being. i plan to attend different cultural clubs each semester i am at notre dame, so i can open my ears and eyes to as many different people as possible. lastly, by serving others, i will find my place in the world and with god. hopefully, all my actions i take at notre dame will serve others. whether it's reaching out to them when they are suffering, leading them in a club, or even just being an example of how to branch out, i want to serve. by the time i graduate, i want to be looked at as someone who wants to help and someone to go to. this requires helping and listening to one person at a time, but through patience i will meet my goal. if i can live as i outlined, through god and my family, to achieve my goals, i will have lived a good life. integration 3 - sooner, hoosier, german: julian was all three friends, hoosiers, countrymen, lend me your ears. today, we celebrate a man whose accomplishments are only outweighed by the impact he had on those close to him. my name is osborne, and i am one of julian’s two children. was a husband, father, judge, but most importantly, a friend. tragically, julian died peacefully in his sleep at the ripe old age of 85 exactly three days ago. as his son, i knew julian’s life very well. he had accomplished much in his life, but he always made sure to hold steadfast to his moral code and personal beliefs. as someone very close to him, i always remember him being very relaxed, even in the most stressful of times. so, one day i asked him, “how are you always so relaxed?”. that is when he taught me this valuable lesson: ““half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.”” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this lesson made me realize that perhaps we just need to take a little breather in our busy lives and reflect on our own experiences rather than try to pick up new ones. perhaps another quote about reflection that julian mentioned often was, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). julian stressed that although we should engage in self-reflection and relaxation from time to time, we must not get too caught up in it. oftentimes, in his youth, julian would think about the future, the past, and the present, however, after realizing that this reflection might actually not lead to any concrete revelations, he started using it as more of a mechanism to check up on himself. this led to the growth of the confident old man we all knew and loved. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ another incredibly important lesson that julian taught me was that we must treasure every moment we have. as we see today, life is very short. when considering the future, it also helps to relive the past—specifically the experiences that have shaped us. while quoting a literary work, julian used to explain that “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i have taken this quote to heart and have always looked back on my experiences and determined how they have shaped me today—and how they might shape my future. perhaps one of julian’s greatest abilities was one that he shared in common with a great president of his alma mater. some described father hesburgh as follows: “father hesburgh had an extraordinary ability to reach across lines” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). julian also embodied this quality. after graduating from notre dame, julian worked to forge many strong relationships with everyone around him—whether these were his friends, enemies, or even strangers. through this strong ability he advanced far in life and made many valuable connections. it is often overlooked how beneficial it can be to just start a conversation and talk to someone. julian was never afraid to shy from conversation, and throughout his college life, he worked on becoming more and more approachable. this way, not only would he be able to extend his network to those whom he didn’t know, but he would also be able to extend an olive branch to those who might usually shy from conversation. a testament to his kindness was shown through his constant advice that even in the direst of times, we must be there for others. he said that it didn’t matter if we were in a bad situation, if someone was worse off and asking for help, we should do the same as the homies in fr. greg https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149229 boyle’s book and ask, “‘can i give him my blood’” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). he detailed that we must always try our best to help others. further in life, he often used this philosophy when making judicial decisions. he worked to grow to the mindset of “how can i give my blood for those in need.” throughout his life, often pursued his ultimate goal—to make an impact on the world. julian realized during his youth: “i realized that the true effect i want to have is to change the world for the better” (“interview reflection” by moreau fye week five). after graduating from notre dame university with a degree in honors mathematics and aerospace engineering, he went on to pursue a degree in international law from harvard university. with this, he became a judge on the international court in geneva. he ruled on many important cases and through this career path had a substantial impact on those around him and all the world. as his son, i often asked julian for career advice. julian simply always made one reply: ““does anybody need you to do it?” ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). his philosophy was as follows: even if you find something that you really love to do, you always need to make sure that someone needs you to do it. then, you can make a career out of it. if someone needs you to do it, they will likely pay you for it, and then, a successful life will follow, and you will flourish. in addition to all of julian’s accomplishments and personal beliefs, he was also one of the most caring individuals i have ever known. he would never hesitate to risk anything and everything for his family. i was lucky to grow up in a household so full of love, and that is why it is so tragic that he has passed away so soon. he was very giving with his love. he never asked for favors back, or even expected anything in return. he would always do good for other https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/167905 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dsktjxyhsz5xv5uuikjujry913g9jgbaattrzwsncik/edit?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149291 people—whether this be small acts like helping the neighbors carry the groceries inside or big acts like helping a stranger back on their feet. so, i know that he was just as loved by the community as i—and many of you—love him. although we may reminisce about julian’s life philosophies, advice, loving, and career, we are all coming here together today to remember a man who was special to all of us. he helped us all through the toughest of times and was there exactly when we needed him. i am extremely grateful that i have had such a great example to look up to, and i hope that we may all take away some of the lessons he yearned to teach others throughout his life. may he rest in peace. s2 moreau integration 2 moreau fye 29 april 2022 my map to a life well-lived i, , aim to live my best life as an individual who is kind and inclusive of others. i want everything i do in life to come back to benefitting another person or group of people in some manner. i also want success, fulfillment, growth, close relationships and happiness for myself. i never want to catch myself being selfish and focusing only on me, instead i always want to bring my focus back to helping others. this can be achieved through my job, my relationships, and just the way i go about my everyday life. i believe making a difference in the lives of others will benefit me personally and of course benefit others, making it a win-win situation. the highest life i can achieve is one in which i have a loving family that i am proud of and that i, myself, am an active community member who is actively working to make a difference in the lives of people who are less fortunate. it is important to live your life with a guiding mission statement, principles, and firm beliefs. however, it is not realistic to believe life will pan out perfectly according to your plan. in reality, everyone will face struggles, trials, and tribulations that feel off-putting. “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith but in the end you find strength” (“hesburgh” film by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh offers us these words of wisdom that affirm that though struggles seem like the end of the world at the time, once you have moved past them you are a better and stronger individual. overcoming obstacles becomes a beneficial tool in the long run. like father hesburgh, sister aletheia offers her unique interpretation on suffering. she https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 says, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” new york times moreau fye week 3). i often find myself thinking positively and pretending my struggles do not actually exist, but this a harmful mindset to adopt. to accurately live by my mission statement, i need to realize it is okay to not be okay sometimes. in order to move forward, you need to deal with your sad or angry emotions. suppressing them, and only looking at the bright side of life, can ultimately be damaging. if father hesburgh and sister aletheia’s wise words were not enough, the congregation of holy cross also addresses the topic of life struggles. they proclaim, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12). this message affirms that everybody, race, gender, ethnicity aside, is the same in our struggles and in our relationships with god. the one thing that unites us is that we have god who will get us through our rough times. he has a divine plan in which everything will work out in the end if you have trust and faith. in order to live my best life, as close to my mission statement as possible, i need to not be scared of life obstacles and instead face them head on, knowing they will help me in the long term. one element of my mission statement that means the most to me is living a fulfilling life full of happiness. i do not ever want to find myself feeling useless, bored, or that i’m not seeking every possible opportunity. it is important to remember, “life is full of unexpected things. it could come and go anytime” (“five minutes” grotto network moreau fye week 6). you must live everyday as if it is your last so you don’t come to the end of your life full of regrets. you https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 need to take all of the unexpected life events with grace and find some way to make the most of them. if things do not go according to plan, do not fret, and instead turn it into something fruitful. i often fear that my life will be boring or unfulfilling. it turns out that i am not alone in this fear. “the idea of going nowhere is as universal as the law of gravity; that’s why wise souls from every tradition have spoken of it” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). if anything, this fear should motivate us to make sure we don’t go nowhere. in order for me to live the fulfilling life that i want, i need to be active and make concrete plans. you cannot go through life passively, assuming everything will work out the way you want it to. a good recommendation to ensure you live a fulfilling life full of joy and happiness is to first figure out your passions and interests. you may think you know what these are, but until you have real life experiences, you could be wrong. i always thought i was meant to be a doctor until i came to college, realized i actually did not enjoy the pre med route, and then entirely changed my career path. it is helpful to live by the quote, the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). this principle can be applied to jobs, relationships, as well as passions and interests. to live by my mission statement, i first need to user my college years to experiment and find what i love and enjoy. in order to live a well-lived life, you must remember to lean on others and build strong relationships. in college so far, i have found these people in college to be my roommates, dorm friends, and classmates. even if you fell alone or feel yourself shutting in your feelings you must remember, “that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i,” separated from each other, and we can only build the future by standing together” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis moreau fye week 7). relying https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript on relationships with others will get you far in life. they are a valuable resource for job connections, friendship, fellowship, and collaboration. it is valuable to sit down and have deep conversations with both people you love and with people who you want to get to know more. this is similar to what we practiced in week 5 of moreau when we had a conversation with someone from our lives in which we asked them tough questions (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). some people who have really leaned into strong relationships with others are the people at domingo savio. they were described as, “though they had few material resources, everyone at domingo savio – adults and children – cared for me with incredible grace” (“teaching accompaniement” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). though these people do not have much materially, they have realized they can get all of their meaning and fulfillment from being kind to and connecting deeply with others. we can all learn from them at notre dame, being such a competitive environment, and instead lean into helping each other. forging strong, meaningful, and long lasting relationships are integral to living by my mission statement to bring me life fulfillment. another important principle to live by is expanding your horizons. being at notre dame, it may feel as if there are so many diverse students, but in actuality we are trapped in a bubble with very similar students for four years. it can be hard to expand this bubble and connect with the outside world while being at notre dame. all students must remember, “most whites live, grow, play, learn, love, work and die primarily in social and geographic racial segregation. yet, our society does not teach us to see this as a loss” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). we as a student body and as an american society need to change our mindset to view staying in our comfortable bubble of people as a loss. by not branching out, you are greatly missing out. this same principle can be https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit translated to media and online culture as well. we need to be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree, attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). part of our human nature is that we naturally tend to only seek out opinions and conclusions that agree with our own. in society, with the increase of social media and echo chambers, we have lost the ability to recognize when we are wrong and ultimately change our beliefs. we need to realize “the loss” we are experiencing when we stay within our echo chamber in order to get the most out of life. in order to abide by my mission statement, living a life in order to gain success, fulfillment, growth, close relationships and happiness for myself, i need to make some changes in my current life. first i must begin by not fearing obstacles, but instead leaning into my struggles and seeing them as meaningful and beneficial instead. next time i get a bad grade on an exam, i need to not complain, but instead make a plan on how to study better for the next one. next, i need to branch out and not get stuck in a comfortable routine. i must join clubs, take classes that are genuinely of interest to me, and then discern my major and career path based off of that. additionally, i need to lean into my relationships with others. i already have such close connections with my peers, but i need to focus on making connections with my professors next. there is so much i can learn from them if i first get over my fear of talking to them. finally, i need to get out of my bubble of people who are similar to me and realize the world is such a big place full of so many opinions, experiences and personal backgrounds. this can be accomplished both at notre dame and when i graduate and enter into the “real world.” if i follow all of these goals as i plan to, i will find myself living a life well lived. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s capstone integration robert corrato robert corrato 04/29/22 taylor kelly moreau fye the pursual of fame, fortune, and love of being first and foremost, this title doesn't do justice to defining how i am truly going to end up being in my life. the title of finding that new fame, fortunately making enough money to live comfortably, keeping my family close, and bringing in new members is what i believe will happen in my soon future. it can be drastically different from those few reasons, but as of right now, in my relatively juvenile to young adult life, that is what i picture. during this semester of my moreau first year experience, as a class, we have explored the true meanings of finding your well-lived life through your root beliefs and how you utilize those beliefs that make you the person you are today. each classroom discussion acted as an opportunity to be vulnerable and state your true feelings about how you want to be a person in the future regardless of what anyone else will think. especially in my specific major (ftt), a lot of people look down on engaging yourself in something that qualifies as an art in retrospect to another major with more of an emphasis on something stem or finance-related. yes, this was detrimental to my conscience, and it was reflected in all my qqc's, whether stated or unstated. also, i have had a very significant bump in my life that my qqc's also reflected in the tragic murder of a very close childhood friend. these two were the most significant life moments for me last semester that forced me to think differently than i used to, and my experience in and out of class positively helped me the most. through my mission statement that i wrote, i combined my personal lessons passed down through my family and the lessons i learned in our class discussion to find the right words to describe how i must live a fruitful life. together with specific quotations from each qqc, show how i will pursue my version of my life well lived. kicking off how taylor, our instructor, guided us through making our own lives redeemable, you must be able to find yourself and understand what you want to do with your life. this is a loaded statement, and this is exactly what college is about in retrospect to growing up as a young adult. in week one of moreau, we are told to slow down our lives and look back and forward towards the future. pico iyer states that: "the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it's the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape." (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one) having that sense of not needing to worry along with how that silence and restful time to think. i've been doing lots of thinking due to my first doubts about changing my major in the very beginning of the semester, but that thought is far, far away from me now. what kept me going in ftt was the inspiration and original mission i had so very long ago. in week two, the class was assigned to watch fr. hesburgh's documentary, called hesburgh, about his life and the glorious things he has done for both the catholic church and education as a whole. in the film, fr. hesburgh was said to be "...a mediator." (hesburgh by patrick creadon moreau fye week two) being a mediator defines how there must be a level of mutual respect for all people, something that is reiterated many times in my mission statement. trying your best, being a kind leader, and never giving up are all aspects of self respect or respect for others. basic factors that put together that quote, "try your best, never give up, and be a kind leader" show how one must go beyond their comfort zones. these include exploring, discerning, and questioning what you must do in order to fulfill your personal mission statement. there is a very large amount of planning that goes into this, as said in week four's class, "... it's not a one-step process." (career development reflection activity by notre dame moreau fye https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147286 https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0agryh4swx0bz38 week 4) lots of thought, often losses in train of thought, have gone into the simple decisions all times of the day. as said in my introduction, i am often left questioning about my major, the work and effort i am putting into my classes, and if this ftt route is even the decision for me. i am not alone in this, as i have talked about this with many other sophomore ftt majors. week three's primary source comes from sister alethia. she states: "it's actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them." (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die moreau fye week three) dark realities in life aren't just in the movies or feelings from others you know. they also go beyond the classroom and the aspect of being at notre dame. the dark realities struck me at the beginning of this semester in one of the worst ways possible. after christmas break, i lost a childhood friend to a straight-up, wrong place, wrong time misfortune. i met makai in kindergarten, where he was known as the biggest and strongest kid, while also being the most gentle. week six of moreau introduced forms of meditation to us. since this dreadful week, i have been finding five to ten minutes every day to meditate. a specific line from one of our mediation sessions in week six reminded me how i should be thinking after and during the mourning stage of my great friend. the narrator said: "find your deep wish that you may be well in your deep suffering. let go of the practice and how your body feels right now. let any sensations be just as they are in this moment." (ways to practice mindfulness by mcdonald center for student well-being moreau fye week six) being frank, i suffered and i suffered for a long time from this. i suffered with my friends after being on endless phone calls to some of the strongest and biggest men i know crying to another man crying on the other end. even some people i talked to i haven't connected within a very long time, maybe even since middle school. this forced me to "to break bread together, to be present on a journey with a beginning and an https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view end." (a learning journey together by professor steve refienberg moreau fye week nine) i started new journeys with people i didn't know extremely well and saw an opportunity to reconnect over tragedy. it's a poor way to reconnect and reach out, but this makes me rethink how i must continue to look out for people in my community that have made an impact on me in my life, somehow, someway. as time went on, i moved away from my time of suffering. it was incredibly difficult and only time truly tells how you will feel after. the death of makai told me to move on and focus on myself. i know in my heart it was the last thing he would have wanted. there would never be a time makai would make a big deal about anything regarding himself and would instead bring those up around him. after this struck, i knew that his time was over and he would have wanted me to focus on myself, my personal development as an adult. this time of discernment allowed me to reflect back on my original doubts about what i want to do as a human and how i would shape my life. discernment is the obtainment of your own spiritual direction. week five's qqc was different, making us ask a friend for some personal quotes on how you define yourself through your own discernment. a friend, julia, stated that "(i) you value ensuring that my future ensures what i am passionate about rather than what happens to make the most money." (discernment activity by robert corrato/julia difazio moreau fye week five) seeing how short life is, it has made me realize the categories of greater importance in life. money, objects, and non-viable connections aren't nearly as important as strong friendships, love, respect, and family. sure, i want to have a great job in the film industry, but fortunate enough, money doesn't have to be a top-priority driving factor of what job i will end up taking. as i previously reflected earlier in the semester in my first integration assignment, we were tasked to write our own eulogy in reflection to how we believe our lives will pan out. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147724 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1e3wzgm8gxqw04ohwkktply656xc0pswmoviehbj7wvc/edit something that i greatly focused on was the interpretation of how important family is. coming from an established italian background, the mob movies weren't joking when they reiterated how tight knit an italian family is. i stated earlier that, "his sister and family were absolutely the strongest relationship out of anyone else in his lifetime." (integration 3 by robert corrato moreau fye week eight) as i've grown, the relationship with my nuclear and extended family has only helped my perusal of a life well-lived. yes, there are ups and downs, arguments and what not, but all of those are quickly forgotten by everyone soon after. having solidarity amongst my family means that there is a relationship between two or more people. i most often see this as a "family" tie since they bring me and many others a sense of unity and support as one title, the corrato family name. i consider this a gift, as pope francis stated in week seven's video of him preaching. he says, "when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life" (why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) relationships are gifts, and so is family. taking life one relationship at a time and focusing on those who matter to you the most will eventually end up paying you in the long run. another relationship that goes beyond family is my relationship with god. coming from a catholic background, attending k-12 private episcopalian school, and now coming to a catholic university, it is safe to say that an influence of god and prayer has been surrounding my life for some time now. every night, i pray. when i feel the need, i pray. when i attend mass, i pray. in these prayers, i follow god's guidance along tasks of my everyday life. i a "(i ask him if he) can show you." (growing up gay and catholic by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten) the ways instead of just making them happen. this process of learning is something very similar to what my father would do. he never let me or my sister get something without a process of https://docs.google.com/document/d/1j3bp5r4fhc3lu31azwvrbjvkf0dgwys5id5gd4vwfz0/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147657 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147657 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147767 achieving it, which is something i am very grateful for. learning determination through either religion/or physical encounters have been proven to be the best sources for me. being determined on a task or career goal is something that has been taking up mass amounts of time and space in my brain. in order to continue on the path you set for yourself, you must remain courageous that your work ethic and drive will not fail you. that is the part of "try your best" that is summarized in my father's quotation. as seen with makai, life is something that can be taken away from you in a fraction of a second. going beyond the call of duty when helping others would be something similar to what my dad would say as well. when your drive for success comes with the implication of others, there is a mutual promise between me, you, and all people that i will help you in a time of need, especially when it is needed the most. when you can help, when you are healthy to support, and when you have the opportunity, i will always remember, regardless, "i must do something." (i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). as i will get older, i will grow more wise based on the decisions and things in my life that god will make me endure. i firmly believe that wisdom comes with age, experience, and reasonably common opinion. in becoming wise, just be able to open up to different experiences and differing opinions. in week eleven, dr. blaschko, a professor at the university of notre dame, stated, "first, we should be intentional about the info we expose ourselves to…secondly though, we must keep an eye on our own motives…" (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) keeping yourself on task with your own life and not getting drawn into the success of others is something very, very important in the cutthroat industry i intend to work in. not getting distracted in the very visually distracting world will be hard, even now, it's hard for me to not compare myself and my work. looking over all of this and https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147868 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147868 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40291/modules/items/147825 just focusing on yourself is by far the best and most important factor of your own success while working on projects that suit you and your feelings. to round off this rant about my life and inner-emotions, i want to quote myself. pursuing a life well lived is nothing without the passion for living life. this may sound awkward, but it is rather simple. surround yourself with your family, they will support you everlasting. blood is an unbreakable bond. the writer of my personal statement, who is me, without technically being me, said that "(he wants to) see the passionate and wonderful things you will accomplish." (mission statement by robert corrato moreau fye week thirteen) as of right now, i feel like i am in a waiting room, waiting for my first year of college to end, exams to pass, and to get to the summer where i can see all of my old friends i so dearly miss. now that i know my passion, which is filmmaking, i shouldn't stop and watch. now is the time and today is the day to create, so don't let that passion flow away. sincerely, rob. https://docs.google.com/document/d/16-gj7shaozyhwh8v1mlby4bguuirab3f2_shlhoy18i/edit final integration wilcutt 1 megan wilcutt michael communiello moreau first year experience 27 april 2022 the mission to constantly evolve i believe that life is to be lived with the intent of forming meaningful relationships and experiences that exceed superficial success. our society today typically defines success as economic progress. the more money you make, the more you have on your resume, the more you live a successful life. however, i believe that life is more than living to work. when you enter into this monotonous cycle of working to make more, you lose part of what it means to be human. you lose sight of the meaningful connections and experiences life offers you. in society and even on campus, there is a pressure to always be on top of things, and if you aren’t working or studying like a maniac, you’re doing it wrong. however, when looking at life through this lens, you lose sight of the human relationships that breed happiness. true happiness is formed by building and maintaining deep relationships with other people. to be in a relationship with each other, one must accompany others on their individual journey and accept the accompaniment of others. every interaction has the potential to create a meaningful relationship. not only is life meant to build social relationships with others, but to use those relationships and one’s own privilege to make a profound, positive impact in the world ( moreaumoreau fye_week thirteen:writing a personal mission statement activity_sp22 fye week 13). over the next three years, this mission statement will hold me accountable in maintaining strength in suffering and pursuing my passions. first, i know that at notre dame, i am going to https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit wilcutt 2 be challenged beyond my wits. even this year, i’ve stayed up all night, cried over grades, and been pushed to the point of almost giving up. adjusting to not receiving straight a’s took the entire year. yet, my mission statement and what i’ve learned this semester reflects how success to me is trying my best. the hesburgh documentary we watched said, “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). this quote reminded me how you need to experience both the highs and lows of life to fully understand who you are as a person, an important aspect of a life well-lived, and can be applied as i continue in my journey at notre dame. the lows in life and at notre dame, however unpleasant, must be embraced as they reveal parts of ourselves that we otherwise would never know existed. in those moments when i want to give up at notre dame, it might be hard to realize that suffering is part of the journey to a life well-lived. but, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). to follow my mission, i must remember that there is always a larger picture than the current experience i am facing. everything i will go through will mold me into a better person and help me realize what matters most, whether it be pursuits in the legal field or on a more personal level in relationships. for, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” ("navigating your career journey" by the meruelo career center moreau fye week 4). with this mindset, a life well-lived includes seeing the silver lining in every situation and seeing the beauty in even the worst situations. during week 6, we watched a video about jihoon kim who was paralayzed from a snowboarding accident. yet instead of accepting a pessimistic https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjnb9swdib%2fiqg7lx8kcywkabigqwnkndfko%2bwsydatclffvztb5n9pttquuxq7isd4ku9dakqya41y9o6oh%2bgpb3lbajljuyqbphwcpwe1gy%2fcuv77qehg4tibcvzlx5k82lpgf1hsqgcsjwiwrih6wglyujufitm0jnmwzbfjrgsxsiqokirflfj6kupld1uentmkometk5fuimh6lo3hvvbpq3d3wb1gz6grheym1ggc7hio51ostzetenpyvy%2bb%2fd4b55wi%2budegm9oa7hizdhetgsdvvis%2ba7vmdkiwxrbr0o3sh9mrldaocrfqvtpjfwtnovva%2bhxrhuring%2f3zzh%2bwozzcgccozacyea%2bg7sbuyzquhn4%2fov2bv76ijkoileiaiao17eyv8egphgmk%2fxohqkyzxzco5atej6pm%2fdmvcunp8o1ej6c%2ftb%2f7lcvogw%2bf%2fynvipq24tjxjwtatlia2ql8gibfhlzoj0ft3o9n7bfh6t%2ffvd5n8a&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=gx27z%2byjrmfitnpm1p9amxf0vm%2fuhuqblpdrbqkra3pv27a394r2r8vmlfojails%2fblp5d8dzfr3vuf9h6qbd9mrxaszmb676ayymuvl85avrwo9jw3eknuoaghyme%2ff6wfg3lj6vdbfblz2cl8psaer8gzxzurpl%2fbd46szkbhanbvkvzsbkqqmceziip7tzl1haskzhasoqpp8yelqxpvalrxyc7xofwavnyaabgjponbb8dy2x9gbg%2fllnmrmpsnthnox7vgkfcxusq4w7xtaos4ryidjo5bcubnvs%2f6wb4%2bifw7armtudnzdrd9wjz%2bnclpd6xqtsgdmmzongg%3d%3d https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ wilcutt 3 view of life and dwelling on his struggles, he realized that life is not about what you can’t do but what you can. he emphasized that his suffering taught him more than it ever hindered him (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week 6). this reinforced in me that we have the choice in life to how we react to things. we can internalize our suffering, choose to stay stagnant in response, and foster resentment against life, or we can embrace it head on, accepting the opportunity to grow and learn. this mindset i now believe is essential to living a life well-lived. above all else, my mission in life is centered around forming deep and meaningful relationships with others. for, as i’ve learned this semester, “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week 7). to me, relationships are the biggest signifier of a life well-lived. before this class, my initial definition of a life well-lived centered around the traditional version of success, but now it’s centered on having successful relationships. life is about the people you meet along the way, those who change your life and those whose lives you change. it’s both the immensely deep conversations you have with your close friends losing track of all time and the tiny relationships you have with the dining hall workers. in my own life, however, i know i inherently put up walls and am hesitant to let people see the real me out of fear of rejection. in week 10, we read an article that said, “you don’t believe you can be loved. you think if people knew the real you, they wouldn’t love you either” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week 10). it resonated with me because it’s exactly how i used to think. coming into notre dame, i was terrified to make friends, and i let that fear hinder me from doing exactly that. this semester, with a more solid group of friends, i’ve been able to open up and meet more people than previously. i’ve never felt more community and love than i do now, so i plan on continuing this attitude in my coming years. every year, i hope to get to know more https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 wilcutt 4 people deeply and look forward to the possibility of meeting someone new everyday. everyday is a new opportunity to build a new relationship, and i plan on making everyone feel as though they are loved and appreciated the way they are. alongside creating new relationships comes the concept of accompaniment, as described by steve reifenberg ( teaching accompanimenta learning journey together, steve reif… moreau fye week 9). being a true friend means being there for someone in the ways they need it, not necessarily how you think they need it. when accompanying people, their voice, their dreams, and their needs are the ones prioritized, not your own. as humans we often lose sight of others in our own desires, but we must be able to walk with each other through life’s triumphs and struggles and also be able to accept the company of other people when we most need it in return. at notre dame, i’ve struggled with being a true friend in all honesty. first semester, there was so much going on at all times that i often only focused on my own problems and neglected some of my relationships. this semester, however, i’ve learned more so how to balance the idea of taking care of myself while also prioritizing accompanying my friends through their struggles. this balance is something i hope to carry throughout my three more years here and past. this outlook can further be applied to professional relationships in a life-well lived. for a life well-lived, it is important to find a passion in the professional field and hone in on it. coming into notre dame, i looked around and saw all these brilliant people each with an incredibly impressive designated plan for their life. they knew what they wanted to do, how to get there, and how to be the absolute best at it. i lost sight of my own journey, constantly finding myself comparing my lives to their. when talking with my mom during week 5, i realized i’m right where i need to be. each person’s journey to and even definition of a life well-lived is different. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit wilcutt 5 but, nobody has to have their whole life planned out to continue on their journey, rather as my mom explained it’s more about what’s in their heart that matters most ("discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week 5). the discernment activities this semester have helped me realize that my mission in life encompasses a professional field where i can truly help and give back to others.. as i look to my life beyond notre dame, i hope to follow my mission as i pursue a career as a pro bono criminal defense attorney. in week 12, we read a piece from dean cole which emphasized how we need to start using our privilege to make a positive difference in the world. every minute of every day someone’s human rights are being horribly violated while others sit idly by and let it happen. i do not want to be one of those people. i want to use my notre dame education to advocate for the rights of others in some way (“'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole -moreau fye week 12). with this in mind, that’s why i’ve been able to discern my future path. everyone deserves somebody in their corner or a shoulder to cry on, but the most vulnerable tend to be the ones without that support system. in week 11, similarly, the articles discussed how our society has become so polarized politically, yet it seems no one cares about it on a smaller scale ( by dr. paul blaschkomoreaubig questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber fye week 11). today, people have become extremely polarized on large scale issues, but ignoring issues on a local scale. real, substantial change, however, begins on a small scale. this message resonated with me specifically as i look at the disparities within my city of st. louis. st. louis is historically a very racist and segregated city. minority groups experience so many more hardships than anyone else out of the systemic racism and exclusion that permeate our society. with this in mind, my mission is ultimately to be a pro bono lawyer in st. louis specifically to https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ wilcutt 6 both fulfill my passion and address the issues that are so often overlooked. i hope that by serving others in st. louis i can not only change their personal life but spread the messages i’ve learned this semester as reflected in my mission statement. ultimately, this semester in moreau has helped me discern my definition of a life well-lived and how i can come to live it. my mission statement will forever be a work in progress, adapting alongside me growing up. as sister aletheia explained in the article we read in week 3, nobody has an infinite amount of time on this earth, so we have to make the ones we have truly count (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die the new york times” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). we have to find the people and the things we truly love and hold them as tight as we can. in a way, death is what makes life worth living. with this in mind, i plan on making my years count. with every new situation i find myself in or person i meet, i’m positive that my mission in life will shift. my mission will be constantly evolving, as will i as a person. in a way, this ability to evolve each day until death comes into the person i want to be is my ultimate mission in life. at the end of my life, i hope to look back and be proud of who i have become and what i have accomplished. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html peggy hnatusko moreau fye 29 april 2022 the intertwining of my personal mission statement with notre dame’s it’s difficult to for me to imagine that the semester’s almost over. i can still recall the first few weeks and months where i was still uncertain of how the semester and year was going to go. i couldn’t imagine spending an entire four years here at notre dame. somehow though, the first year has already passed. although it felt fast, it was by no means forgettable. the experiences i’ve had this year and the wonderful people i’ve met through classes, extracurriculars, and day-to-day life have had a huge impact on who i am and what i aspire to do in the next three years. being here has made me realize that i want to spend my life breaking expectations, creating meaningful relationships, recognizing and improving on my shortcomings, and standing up for what’s right. hopefully, these goals will result in tangible actions and results, even if it may be difficult to strive towards these goals at times. however, the people i’ve met at notre dame have been great accompaniment and the experiences i’ve had have provided great insight and inspired me to live my life to the fullest in the following years. so, what exactly is my personal mission statement? for one, i want to be able to break expectations. i don’t want to able to be defined by a label or a simple phrase. i want to become somebody that does revolutionary things. for example, father hesburgh broke the norms that others had set for him at the time. “he did a lot of things that people thought of as not particularly “priest-y”; he was entrepreneurial” (hesburgh directed by patrick creadon – moreau fye week two). similarly, i don’t want to “just” be a student or an engineer, but rather a more well-rounded individual who can do lots of different things. notre dame’s holistic education this year has helped me realize that. another thing i want to accomplish is to form meaningful connections. a conversation with one of my friends in week five made me realize that i could greatly influence people with my words and actions. “one thing that stretched my awareness of myself was how much i could influence the people around me without even realizing it” (week five discernment conversation activity – moreau fye week five). this shows that people can have huge influences over one another, so i want to become a positive influence for others as well as learn and grow from other people’s unique experiences. my next goal, recognizing and improving on my shortcomings, comes from my reflections on writing the previous integration assignment. i realized that for me, a life well-lived involves, “a life without any regrets” (“integration three” by – moreau fye week eight) which means that i must be able to identify and improve upon my mistakes. without being able to acknowledge my shortcomings, i could spend the rest of my life with flawed mindsets/biases and never be able to correct them, which would be a huge regret in my life. finally, my last goal involves standing up for what’s right. i believe that with the education that i’ve received and the resources i’ve been given, i have a responsibility to do what’s right. “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.’” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). i think this quote sums up my last goal well, and i think it’s an important ideal to have. with all these goals, how can i tell if i’m accomplishing/working towards accomplishing any of these? a lot of these are intangible, long-term, slowly progressing ideals. although this might be the case, i think that there are lots of ways that myself and others can see progress toward these goals. for one, my goals will involve joining larger communities and working well with large groups of people. to create meaningful change in the world and form strong relationships, it will obviously involve large groups of people. this idea is reciprocated in a reading in week seven, where it says, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together, they had a potful of plenty” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week seven). this demonstrates that great things can only happen if lots of people are on the same page. another thing that change requires is a lack of conflict. i feel that too often, people are caught up in being right. tons of movements and people have this attitude of it’s “us” versus “them” when really, everybody is needed to inspire change. this can be seen in dr. blaschko’s example about politics where he says, “if they actually wanted to participate in politics seriously, they would go about this all differently. instead of hating the other side, they would say, 'hm, is this a neighbor that i can convince in my direction?'" (“big questions 2, part 4: how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). from this, i’ve realized that a clear way that i can see myself working towards my goals is to talk with people rationally about points of conflict and aim to resolve them, not prove that i’m right and they’re wrong. doing that only leads to more conflict and distrust, as history has repeatedly shown in the past. finally, one last way that i can clearly see myself working towards these goals is to take a step back and focus on the bigger picture. too often we get caught up in the details and we miss what actually matters. this is an ideal i developed in week one of moreau, where iyer says, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). so basically, realistic ways of working toward my larger goals are to form connections and work with larger communities, aim to avoid conflict and creating two different, opposing sides, and to focus on the larger issues at hand. doing these things are some ways that my goals can be accomplished in noticeable ways. however, these things are much easier said than done. if it was really that easy to create change and accomplish these goals in a few days, they wouldn’t be my personal mission statements; they’d be done already. one thing that’s hard to do for me is to stay motivated and positive. the video in week six was very inspiring where he says, “so i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau fye week six). however, i find that it’s difficult to always remain productive and optimistic. especially with the ongoing pandemic and all the crazy stuff that’s been happening recently, it’s difficult to stay focused a lot of the times. also, a lot of things that i want to change and stand up for is difficult to change. one issue i’m really passionate about is racial prejudice and discrimination, but i realize that it’s so hard to address this issue. a lot of cases of prejudice aren’t reported and people get away with it on a regular basis. however, the main problem is that there’s systemic racism that’s been institutionalized into a lot of different places, which is hard to change. it takes time, and a lot of people don’t even realize/acknowledge that it’s an issue. reading week ten’s source about racism was very enlightening, as d’angelo talks about his personal experiences and remarks, “this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo – moreau fye week ten). so, a lot of the things i want to change are difficult to do and requires everyone to play a part in helping out. another thing that may be an obstacle in reaching my goals is just the daily stress of everyday life. it seems there’s always something that has be done and a ton of smaller things that all add up. however, as i talked about before, i have be able to step back and look at the bigger picture. i think a great way to do this comes from a reading in week three, where graham says, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). basically, there are lots of obstacles i’ll have to overcome to reach my goals. i have to stay productive and optimistic, combat deeply rooted systems or prejudice, focus on the bigger picture, and much, much more. again, if it were so easy to reach these goals, i would’ve accomplished them already. it’s only because it’s hard that i need to work even harder to accomplish them. being at notre dame this past year has been wonderful, and it’s both confirmed and challenged a lot of values i’ve had for a long time. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey – moreau first year experience course” by muerelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). i think this has been especially true at notre dame. from classes to classmates to instructors to clubs to dorm life, there has been so much to take in and experience. i’ve learned a lot and my views have been challenged a lot this past year. however, notre dame is such a renowned university because of the people that it’s comprised of. just from this one year, i’ve made so many connections and tight friendships that i’m sure will continue to affect me for the rest of my life. “accompaniment reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that “over there” and “here” are intertwined” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenburg – moreau fye week nine). hopefully, the people i’ve met in keenan hall, the classmates i see in class, the friends i hang out with, and the club members that i see at practice every week will accompany me through the next three years. again, i feel extremely blessed to be a part of this campus and to be able to partake in this community. this year has seriously made me reflect on who i am and what i want to do with my life, and i hope that this somewhat ramble-y reflection has clarified my goals for the next three years. i can’t wait for what’s in store in the future. even though i’m sure it’ll come with its fair share of struggles, i’m still looking forward to it. march 3, 2022 moreau just be as you are coming up with a definition to a life well-lived is a challenge that i find both daunting and difficult to grasp. the truth is, when i think about the future, i can never see anything past my mid-thirties. even then, i don’t have a clue what i’ll be doing tomorrow, let alone when i'm thirty-five. it would be nice to go to space, discover the solution to climate change, fix the inequitable education system, be the face of feminism, and maybe cure cancer. but, when i imagine all of these achievements that i could only dream of, i realize that none of them would truly bring me happiness; the people would. the people that i would get to do it with and the people that i would get to do it for. i don’t know what will happen tomorrow, or in a month, or in fifteen years, but i know that i can try my best to positively impact the people who are here in my present today. thus, i have come to the definition of a life well-lived as a life characterized by bringing happiness and taking risks: in always trying my best to improve myself and improve others’ lives, in loving like hearts don’t break, and in putting myself out there to both the best and the worst experiences. i have always been somewhat of an overachiever, and i pride myself upon this ambition. recently, however, i’ve realized that i don’t necessarily need to be always working or accomplishing things to grow as a person. as long as i always try my best, it’s okay to fail sometimes because it allows me to better myself in different ways. for example, today i got my organic chemistry exam score back, and i was sad for a little while but i realized that one number on my computer screen won’t define my life or my future. in fact, putting my best effort into bettering myself and bettering other people’s lives should be about learning what i am passionate about and not about getting the highest grades. in week 4 of moreau, we discussed major and career paths, and the effect that these decisions might have on living a life well-lived. the quote that i chose for that week was "there is no ‘best major’ out there, but there is a ‘best major for you’” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). i often get stressed out because it seems like my grades will impact my career options which will impact my ability to live a good life, but in actuality, living a good life is about learning things that i actually find interesting and using that knowledge to bring happiness to others, no matter what career path that leads me on. in addition, although it is important for self-growth to challenge myself in learning and working, taking time to recuperate is also a very important part of this self-growth. pico iyer states in his ted talk from week 1 of moreau that, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i totally agree with this, and actually learn about how bad a lack of sleep and rest is in my psychology classes almost every day. i often laughed about this because i thought notre dame makes it very hard for students to get a proper amount of sleep and rest, but i realized this semester that if i make it a priority in my life, it’s possible to get a full 8 hours of sleep every night. in order to bring happiness and help others, i need to help myself first. although i hope to bring happiness to other people, including strangers, i also think it is really important in a life well-lived to create genuine relationships that can bring happiness to me. this takes courage, because building these types of relationships means opening myself up to others and being vulnerable. without this vulnerability, however, other people wouldn’t be able to add to my life and help me to become a better person. in week five of moreau, we participated in a discernment activity with a close friend, and the question that i thought was the hardest to ask was “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear?” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). allowing other people to get to know you so well that they can see both your best and worst sides is scary, and it’s equally as scary to let them tell you about what they see. however, that scary question definitely stretched my self-awareness the most in the activity and made me realize how much our close friends and family can contribute to our self-growth and our lives. in addition, i think i was always scared of being vulnerable because i thought that if i loved someone so much and then something went wrong, i would never survive. but, the opposite is true: i can’t survive without loving other people, even if that means i might get hurt. in his ted talk, the pope asserted, “each and everyone’s existence is deeply tied to that of others: life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). as humans, we are social creatures, and we need interactions and love in our lives, or else nothing has meaning. so, instead of being scared of making these connections with others, i hope that in my lifetime i can take advantage of every opportunity to love other people and grow in these interactions. the final part of my definition to a life well-lived lies in experiencing the entire span of human emotions in the highs and lows of life. in philosophy, my professor posed this question: if you could take a pill that would somehow get rid of all the pain in your life, would you take it? for me, i wouldn’t, because i think an essential part of living a good life is experiencing the pain, which comes with taking risks. without something to oppose it, happiness wouldn’t mean anything. dr. kim’s story showed that although it sucks when bad things happen to us, sometimes these are the things that we need the most to help us grow. he says, “i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others instead of what we cannot do and what we have not done yet” (“five minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). it’s totally okay to be angry and upset sometimes, but there are certain situations that we cannot change and so we must move forward and use them as a learning experience. having these moments of sadness, grief, and pain, also helps us to appreciate the best moments of our lives that much more. although i don’t really like to think about death, i agree with sister aletheia’s statement that “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). there are so many dark moments in life and inevitable hardships, because life isn’t perfect. but that’s the best part of it. knowing that you can get through the worst parts is necessary for appreciating and loving the best parts. father hesburgh is someone who i would definitely consider as having led a life well-lived, and in the hesburgh documentary, the first quote was “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). it is easier said than done, but i hope to never live in fear of failure and to keep in mind that if something hurts really badly, that just means that i gave it all i had. so, if future me is reading this and wondering if 18 year old me would be proud of my life, these are the things that i hope for. i hope that you always strive to leave the world better than you found it, let others into the deepest and weirdest parts of your heart, and rise up to challenges as they present themselves. but, i also hope that you take more naps, drink more boba, fail sometimes, lay on your bed and wonder what is the actual point of studying the chemistry of carbon atoms, and even get your heart broken multiple times. you don’t have to solve all of the world’s problems (although it’s good to try) or be someone whose name appears on the cover of a history book. just be as you are. noah (aimara) mayer moreau fye michael comuniello 3-4-2022 patient, steadfast, and steady aimara had the privilege of choosing her own name when she transitioned. her deadname, noah, meant peace or repose. she thought that unfitting for the world we live in, for the life she led. she rarely found peace, whether in the world or within herself. she took the name aimara, an old english name meaning steadfast. for that was what she aspired to be. in a world where she had to make her own place, she aimed to stand strong, to be herself. it was hard for her. she confessed to me so many times that she was just tired, tired of having to stand outside of, and often against, the norms and rules of our culture. on her darkest days, she spoke of waiting for the day when death would take her into their arms and she could simply rest. but whenever the darkness closed in around her and she heard death calling her to give up and go to him, she picked herself back up and kept going. through every struggle and every pain, she kept moving forward, no matter what. a common saying is “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” aimara took that to heart, which meant she often said very little. it’s an open secret that she despised many aspects of popular culture, and that, at times, extended to those who partook in it. but she strove to never let that show, whether in word or in action. she also tried to have her thoughts follow her actions. not the other way around. so no matter what she thought of you, if you needed help, she helped you. she would love you through her actions, even if she hated you in her heart. and she hoped that in doing so, she could come to love you in her heart as well. i remember a time we ran into a high school classmate of hers just by chance, and not just any high school classmate: the classmate she had spoken of as the largest single reason that she had been suicidal through much of high school. the classmate’s car battery had died, and they needed a jump start. aimara pulled us over and immediately went to help them. as soon as i realized who the classmate was, i began waiting for the sparks to fly. but there were none. aimara helped them get the car jumpstarted with the same friendly manner with which she helped everyone. the classmate never even recognized her. they had never seen her after she had transitioned. after we drove away, i asked why she had helped him. i thought she had hated him. i’ll never forget her reply. “i did hate him,” she said. “i still do. that’s why i have to love him twice as much.” aimara lived a simple life. she found a job she liked, one that paid well enough, and she stuck with it her whole career. she found a town she liked, one very similar to the town she grew up in, and she stayed there. she never had any children of her own, but she dearly loved all the children around her, and she was already happy to be an aunt to them, even if they weren’t related by blood. she found a person she liked, one that she got along with and that understood her, and she spent her entire life with them. i count myself extraordinarily blessed to have been that person. for those of you who are wondering, no, we weren’t married. we weren’t in any sort of romantic relationship. but we were partners. we loved each other as much as any couple, just not in the same ways as a couple loves each other. and i miss her as much as any widow misses their spouse. as i’m sure all of us here today miss her. i think it is safe to say that discernment is a life long process. the path of my life is long, and there will almost certainly be unexpected twists and turns somewhere along it. but with that being said, it helps to have some idea at least of what kind of life you want to lead. that’s what this entire semester of moreau has been about, after all: what is my life well lived? and that process starts with a lot of questions. what do i value? what kind of work-life balance do i want? do i want a partner, and if so what kind? what do i want to do? how do i want to serve? or to sum it all up, what do i want? thankfully, this question is not something i have to answer alone. i have people who know me well and care about me who can help me answer it, as my parents did when i had a discernment conversation with them. (“discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week 5). and another important thing to not. i do not need to have all the answers. i do not necessarily need to know why some things are, why i feel a certain way or why something is good for me or why i want a particular thing. i only need to know what i want. what is good for me. what i feel (“the right way to be introspective,” tasha euric moreau fye week 6). the first question father himes tells us to ask ourselves in discerning what we want out life to be is “what brings you joy?” (“three key questions,” adapted from father micheal himes – moreau fye week 3). after thinking long and hard and talking with others, i have come to the conclusion that what brings my joy is small simple things. getting to see a friend perform on stage, giving or receiving small, thoughtful gifts, just spending time with the people i love. notice what is not on this list is changing the world, or otherwise serving in some big, visible way. those things are not a part of my life well lived. not to say that those who go out and do big things are not living lives well lived. the people like father hessburgh who have done so much to change the world for the better have certainly lived lives well lived (“hessburgh” – moreau fye week 2). but their life well lived is not my life well lived. as the career services website tells us, “there is no “best major” out there – but there is a “best major for you.”” similarly, there is no “best life” out there. but there is a “best life for me” (“navigating your career journey,” nd career center – moreau fye week 4). and that best life for me lives in the small things, not in the big ones. it lives in the small acts of kindness, in helping someone with a math problem, or greeting the custodian in my dorm. in a world where it seems like everyone is screaming at you to go out and fix everything, the words of pico iyer really speak to me. “don’t just do something. sit there” (“why we need to slow down our lives,” pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). it is okay not to do big things. it is okay to simply be and to love. to that end, my list of desires for my life is fairly short. i want a job that pays well enough for me to live comfortably. i want an environment that is not overly loud or crowded. and i hope to find a partner. not a romantic partner, but a partner all the same. i also hope to find a community, however small, where i belong, for i fear i will never belong in the larger world. but just because i do not belong in the world does not mean that i am not in it. and as long as i am in it, it is my duty to love it. i have no doubt there will be times when my heart does not want to love the world that has little place for me, but thankfully it is written “for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (matthew 6:21) and not “for where your heart is, there your treasure will be also.” it is difficult to move the heart. but moving our treasure, changing what actions we take and what we give out time to, that is far easier. or as pope francis puts it, “solidarity is not an automatic response . . . it is a free response born from the heart of each and everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone,” pope francis – moreau fye week 7). although i disagree with the last part of his words. solidarity is not born from the heart, for “the heart is deceitful above all things” (jeremiah 17:9). solidarity and love are born in our actions, and from there they seep down to our heart. or in other words, love is not necessarily something you feel first and do later. it is often something that must be done first and only then is it felt. and to that end, even when i may hate the world in my heart, i will love it in my actions, until my actions and my heart are one and the same. integration three andrew burgis professor bryan march 4, 2022 andrew burgis: a guide to a life well-lived andrew jeffrey burgis lived to the age of 87. he was adored by many, well known for his smile, compassion, and love for everyone around him. before he died his peaceful death, he wanted to leave us with three key takeaways that he found made a life that was truly well-lived. the first of these was the idea that we must never stress about the small things in life. rather, we should focus on the bigger picture, as we attempt to decipher what we truly care about, focusing on not attempting to be perfect, but instead striving to be the best people that we can be. the second thing that drew wanted to leave with us was the idea that we should search for joy, doing the things that make us happy. in this process, he encourages us to constantly question ourselves, asking how the things that bring us pleasure and happiness not only improve our lives, but also the lives of others around us. lastly, he challenges all of us to think about the role that others play in our journey and goal for a life well-lived. as he explained to us before he passed, many of the examples and works he cites come from a class he took in college while attending the university of notre dame. each week, their assignments challenged him to reflect on his life and ultimately, played a major role in developing him into the father, friend, and man that he became. theme one: the importance of direction and the beauty in imperfection throughout weeks one and two, drew was encouraged to begin thinking about what makes a life well-lived, and how he could attempt to focus on certain aspects of life to truly make that a reality. in the process and as we look back at his old weekly journal entries, he discussed in week one of that semester much about how, at times, he felt as though he was overwhelmed with the smaller details of life. he explained how he felt lost, forgetting and losing sight of what really mattered in the bigger picture. as he searched for inspiration for his writings, he found an article that really spoke to him. one particular piece that he found applicable to his own life read as follows: “and the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them. the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology. put another way, the ability to gather information, which used to be so crucial, is now far less important than the ability to sift through it.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) while this quote may not exactly represent the idea that drew gathered, it certainly relates as it explains the importance of how we must be able to effectively sift through information, determining what exactly is important to us in our journey, and what is not. similarly to week one, week two focused much on the keys to living a good life, as drew wrote about how that process involves not only embracing our own imperfections, but embracing and understanding the imperfections of others. he encouraged all of us to not focus on these imperfections, but instead be able to acknowledge and understand them, working to improve our relationship with ourselves and others. as he looked for inspiration, we found that he referenced the video resource from that week. he found the following part of that video applicable to his own life which states, “sometimes i was so full of myself that it was just idiotic. he wasn’t perfect either, and he wasn’t afraid to admit that.” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two.) here, drew wrote about just how crucial it is that we not only keep in mind not only our own flaws and imperfections, but recognize that no others are perfect either. in doing so, he explained how that not only brought him to a better https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 understanding of himself, but how that improved his relationships and connections with others around him as well. theme two: connecting how our life’s pleasures and careers encourage growth as the semester went on and drew continued to strive to answer the question of what truly made a life well-lived, he discovered a major part of answering that question could be found in how joy progresses our lives. drew always believed that we should do what makes us happy, but in the process think about how our actions make us grow and develop. week three’s article brought him great material and thought for his weekly journal, as he read how “joy always pushes us forward. it’s a impulsion, a pressure to move forward, to do more, to expend oneself more deeply, more richly, to open ones talents even more widely than one had before.” (“three key questions” fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) here, drew began to truly understand the importance of how we can connect joy and pleasure to growing and expanding our talents and knowledge. throughout his life prior, drew had struggled greatly with attempting to combine his own happiness, with making others happy, all the while trying to grow himself. while he never truly mastered this idea, the more he thought about it, the better he lived and the more he strengthened connections with family, friends, and everyone in between. connecting to week three, drew’s week four journal focused on the ideas of how it is crucial for us to connect not only what brings us joy to self-growth, but our career choices to growth as well. one of that week’s resource articles states “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible.” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) thinking critically about how his career choices https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/467258?module_item_id=143051 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ would not only affect himself, but affect others around him became largely important to drew. as he ended up following in his father’s footsteps (his biggest inspiration), he ended up working his dream job in private equity, constantly challenging the business industry as he attempted to grow the good in business. theme three: determining, thinking about, and understanding the role that others play in our journey to a life well-lived throughout weeks five through seven, drew thought much about the idea that while living a good life was largely on himself and the decisions he made, there was still much left to those around him. in his week five journal entry, drew had a long, detailed discussion with his girlfriend, where he asked her some major questions about himself, hoping to hear someone else’s perspective on what he does well, and what he could improve. she told him about how she gets the sense that drew valued his family and friends greatly. she also told drew about things he could improve and how, while generally focused, he sometimes lost his way in the world of technology and social media, where he would become distracted, jealous, and, at times, insecure, as he got caught up in comparing himself to others, rather than living his best life. unfortunately, this would cause him at times to lose sight of himself and regress in self-growth, but he knew that she was right and that he needed to make a change. week six gave drew much to contemplate, as he read about what personal obstacles might get in the way of a well-lived life, and the ways in which he could deal with them. as he researched for his weekly journal, he read about how there is actually a wrong way to be introspective. one point that stood out to him explained “the people who scored high on self-reflection were more stressed, depressed and anxious, less satisfied with their jobs and relationships, more self-absorbed, and they felt less in control of their lives. what’s more, these negative consequences seemed to increase the more they reflected.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) he found this really applied to himself as people always thought of him as extremely smart, but also extremely calculated, sometimes to too great of an extent. in this way, he often overthought many things that would otherwise seem relatively straightforward and, in the process, would become overly stressed and caught up in the details of things that really didn’t matter all that much. lastly, and one of the most important pieces to drew’s journey and knowledge of attempting to pursue a life well-lived was found in his week seven journal. here, he explained how relationships contribute to a good life and as he read the text resource provided by his professor, how perspective is key to living well. the text that he read was astounding, and helped him take a step back and realize just how lucky he is. a particular piece of the text that he found interesting described how “if a colono, for example, “escapes” to the mountains, the entire camp is given even worse food until they capture the inmate, who is carried into camp, tied on a stick, hanging from legs and hands like an iguana, and is soundly beaten.” ("tattoos on the heart" by fr. greg boyle, s.j. moreau fye week seven) here, in that moment reading that text, drew realized just how lucky he was. going to school at his dream university, with an incredibly loving family at home, and a group of friends at school that he had already formed life-long bonds with. ultimately, drew left a great impression on all those who he encountered in his life. as he was encouraged to do so much throughout his time at notre dame, he constantly strived to search for and live out a life well-lived. in this process, he was not only able to maintain a https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143141 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/modules/items/143141 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/523820?module_item_id=167949 successful career and provide for his family, but in that process form so many strong connections and bonds with others around him. what made drew unique, though, was that he not only challenged himself to live well, treating others with respect and dignity as he sought self growth, but that he challenged others around him to do the same as well. he worked tirelessly to not only live the best life he could, but did everything in his power to ensure that everyone around him had the opportunity and knowledge to attempt to do the same. eulogy 3/1/21 nhat nguyen moreau eulogy draft empathy. one of the most important human traits to have in life is arguably empathy – regard for others’ emotions and the ability to connect and relate to the people around you, regardless of the situation or the context. by providing support and always showing up for others, we not only enrich the lives of others but also our own life (and enrichment is a step on the path to a fulfilling and well-lived life) embodied the trait of empathy wholeheartedly throughout her entire life. as a scholar, she loved the field of psychology and learning why and how the brain works the way it does while developing an interest in the treatment of mental health issues and disorders. as a friend, she was devoted to being a support system for everyone and gained the title of “advice-giver”. as a wife, she prioritized communication and being a sense of calm and comfort in an ever-changing world for her husband. and as a mother, daughter, and sister, she aimed to fill her family’s life with joy and everlasting laughter while always being someone to count on. she loved to laugh, be with her loved ones, sing, and crack jokes. she was an avid scientist – one of the top child psychopathologists in the country and spent her life studying infant brains while working along dedicated colleagues. but how did she get here in the first place? skye was born in a small town in england and grew up surrounded by familiar loved ones and friends. she was a lover of music because she was raised by a talented and musical father, and for a while believed that was what she wanted to do in life. however, she remembers and reflects on a time during her lower school class when a teacher asked her and her peers, “what do you want to be when you grow up?”. skye, feeling instantly overwhelmed about the looming future ahead of her, decided to take a step back and think about the thing she wanted to do in life – therefore, starting a sort of juvenile bucket list. by taking a step back and constantly looking at the bigger picture, skye was able to organize her growing up in a way that allowed her to explore her passions and crafts. in week 1 of the moreau first year experience, we explored the question what life am i living? and read an article by pico iyer on slowing down and taking a step back during our daily routines. iyer says, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (iyer). iyer describes life as a canvas, which is a great way to put it – we are the painters of our own canvases, and skye was able to try every single color to find which painting she liked best. although skye wished she could have done this more often, she was able to gain a lot out of simple activities by focusing on the bigger goals at hand while simultaneously being present in the moment. skye moved to america at age seven, and remembers how difficult it was to leave her childhood friends behind and pack up with her family to move to a new country. however, she transitioned into first grade at princeton day school and loved the new atmosphere. at pds, she learned to balance family, schoolwork, sports, extracurriculars, homework, and studying all at once, and by high school, she had really gotten into the flow of things. one thing she found challenging, however, was balancing family life with school. in week 2, we learned the extraordinary story of father ted hesburgh and his drive for equality and passion for social change. during his documentary, we were introduced to hesburgh’s personal life and how often he was away from home – obviously, balancing his mission with being there for his family all the time was a complex and often complicated reality. when describing hesburgh, his sibling remarked, “father hesburgh and the u.s. commissioner on civil rights – their leadership is, in many ways, when this country decided that we’re not going to go backwards. we’re going to go forwards...we were all very proud of what he was accomplishing, but during that period, our family saw very little of him” (hesburgh). this quote shows that when we dedicate ourselves to our crafts, it’s hard to always make time for those closest to us. skye really related to this theme, as she often found herself spending late nights at school with extracurriculars or at sports games – but through trial and error she learned the best ways to balance out her activities and the things that truly inspired a life well lived for her. when skye got accepted to the university of notre dame, she was absolutely thrilled. she was about to embark on an adventure while following in the footsteps of her older brother and paving a path for her children and grandchildren. following along with her everchanging goals, when picking a major, skye took days pondering what she wanted to study. she gathered a list of her strengths and weaknesses and focused on her own moments of joy, and decided on psychology. in week 3, we learned about asking important questions on a quest to determining what fulfills us. father michael himes writes, “one way into that [determing what to do with your life] is to ask the questions:1) what gives you joy? 2) what are you really good at? 3) what do the people around you really need?” (himes). these questions definitely crossed skye’s mind as she decided on her major and path for the next four years, and helped to smoothly guide her transition into college. additionally, part of choosing her major was deciding on a career path, which skye had no clue for most of her college experience as she instead loved exploring and branching out. in week 4, we learned about ways to choose a career and how to avoid burnout. in the undergrad web page, one quote sticks out especially, “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible. if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall. if someone focuses only on skill, for example, he/she may realize that that interest is lacking or alignment with values or personality is off” (nd undergrad center). this is an important thing to consider, hence why skye always felt it was important to use your strengths to strengthen your weaknesses and to not rely on one quality to carry you in your career – therefore, she went into the healthcare field where science, care, and compassion mix every day. if you ask those around her, many will say that skye’s greatest weakness was the pressure she put on herself. she was a perfectionist in so many aspects, and while she readily gave love to those around her, it seemed to lack when she looked at her own life and accomplishments. in a conversation with her mother, the question “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear” (moreau discernment activity) was posed. ms. macinnes shared with skye that skye often stayed within the comfort of her own space and was often too scared to let loose of the opinions of others. skye was an avid observer, but this was a hindrance when it came to focusing on herself and her own growth and plan, as skye avoided disappointing others and instead played it safe in many aspects of her life, which she voiced that she regretted later. this relates to week 7 of fye, in which we challenged our own perspectives by finding personal obstacles. for skye, her biggest personal obstacle was thinking about herself without taking time to truly know herself. in a ted article, author eurich explains, “university of sydney psychologist anthony m. grant discovered that people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness. similar studies have shown that people high in insight feel more in control of their lives, show more dramatic personal growth, enjoy better relationships and feel calmer and more content. however, grant and others have also come to realize there’s no relationship between introspection and insight. this means that the act of thinking about ourselves isn’t necessarily correlated with knowing ourselves” (eurich). by constantly thinking about others and how they viewed her, skye wasted a lot of her time worrying about things instead of focusing on herself and having her best interests at heart. the one thing skye was incredibly grateful for was the relationships she made at high school, at notre dame, and after graduation through her job and family. having support from others and different sorts of relationships with many different people helped sustain and interesting and fulfilling life for skye, and pushed her to be the best version of herself. in week 7, we learned of the importance of friendships and letting others into our jurisdictions. one article writes, ““except for the fact that we all need to see that we are in each other’s jurisdictions, spheres of acceptance – only, all the time. and yet, there are lines that get drawn, and barriers erected, meant only to exclude. allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (boyle). by letting her guard down and letting others into her jurisdiction, skye lived out a fulfilling life – one with ups and downs (no doubt) but one of laughter, happiness, and success. although she is gone today, we should live for skye by taking time to think about others and putting others before ourselves like she would have. she knew how much she was loved, and we know she’s smiling down at us right now, laughing and playing with her beloved golden retriever, ceilidh. skye, you’ll be missed but remembered and loved so greatly. thank you. eulogy integration clumsily striving toward the good welcome dearest friends and family. i would first like to extend my immeasurable gratitude to all of you for the roles you played in shaping the young woman whose life we gather to celebrate today. i would secondly like to acknowledge the elephant in the room (or perhaps in the sky). yes, it's me. abigail shannon chittle – the one and only. the girl whose name is printed on the worship aide that you are probably sitting on. and yes i am writing my own eulogy (i apologize in advance for the somewhat jarring switches from first person to third person and the confusing narrative point of view). it's a bit out of the ordinary, and trust me, it's quite an odd experience for me as well. despite the somewhat absurd impossibility of this situation ever occurring, i will do my best to proceed with integrity (although i have to admit i may be a bit biased). alright then here we go. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it's a genuine rightness in how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by father micheal himes moreau fye week three). abigail shannon chittle – known by most as abby (with the exception of her dad who called her abigail) truly understood this and spent much of her life trading happiness for joy. while she may have thought “abby” was a boring and overused name, she loved that her full name, abigail, means “a father’s joy”. she sought to live up to the name and strove to be a source of joy in not only the life of her father and all those she encountered but to her heavenly father as well. while she understood joy to be “a genuine rightness in how to live one’s life” she didn’t quantify this by the college she chose, the grades she earned, the hobbies she enjoyed, or the career paths that she considered but rather she believed that how she lived her life would be determined by the her relationships with other people and with god. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/467258?module_item_id=143051 it is often understood that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one), but abby could not accept this notion. while it was often hard for her to overcome her insecurities about what other people thought about her, she genuinely valued her interactions, connections, and relationships with others above any material possessions. this being said, she often had times when she struggled with exactly who she was in the tangle of relationships that defined her life. although she knew that “people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective (yes there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, phd moreau fye week six), she often had to deliberately slow down, take a step back, and look inward lest she get lost in the space between herself and others. i could have spent these minutes giving you a chronological summary of the first two decades of abby’s life, but she herself would tell you that that would be a bit boring. she did not think her life was very eventful, with the most notable aspects being her growing up as the second of nine siblings and having her dad as her high school principal. she would tell you that she never decided on a career path with the excuse that “there are so many career paths and industries out there that it’s best not to limit yourself too much ” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). abby enjoyed so many things in life – reading anything from the classics to romance novels, singing – whether on stage or in the shower, running (although she would tell you she hated to race), children – whether they be her siblings or the cute kids in the church pew in front of her, learning anything but calculus, writing in run on sentences, being outdoors in the beauty of creation, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey/ acting in musicals in perhaps offensive british accents, losing her breath playing soccer (even after being concussed by the ball), and being a little too competitive during family game nights. but despite these many interests, she never felt that she had a deep “passion” for any specific field. rather, she found her deepest fulfillment living out her catholic faith and helping others. she strove to live her life according to pope francis that “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). abby’s dad once commented that what she most valued and desired in life was “to do the good in front of her, serve god, and submit to his will” (“moreau fye week five discernment conversation activity” by erick chittle moreau fye week five). now abby would be the first one to tell you that while this is what she desired she most often fell short of this and struggled every day to orient her life towards god’s will. her faith was the source of her identity and through her “faith [she] learn[ed] there is meaning in struggle” (“hesburgh” by father theodore hesburgh, c.s.c. moreau fye week two) as she strove to approach obstacles with faith-founded optimism. she was by no means a saint or even close, but the promise of eternal life was the ideal she strove for. her life was a collection of clumsy stumbles (both physically and spiritually) on the path towards eternal union with the father aided by the guidance of many of you here. thank you all for the essential parts you played in shaping the life of abby and as a side note she will be accepting prayers for her soul’s eventual acceptance into heaven (god willing). https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://ed.ted.com/lessons/why-the-only-future-worth-building-includes-everyone-pope-francis https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau integration three andy de la garza 3/4/2022 a reflection of a fulfilled life i would like to thank everyone who is in attendance for taking the time out of your busy schedules to celebrate the life of the late andres noe de la garza jr. known by most simply as andy, he was an individual that many found to be a reliable friend, a trusting associate, and a genuine individual. while it can be quite a difficult task to reflect on the life of a deceased friend or relative, i encourage you all to recall your favorite memories with andy and think about the mark that he left on you as i continue to speak. many of you who are in attendance may have first encountered andy at his time at the university of notre dame. an undergraduate student from the years 2021 to 2025, andy looked back on his time at the university with fondness, always grateful for the variety of experiences and opportunities that it provided him with. much like the founder of notre dame, father hesburg, who valued critical thinking, faith spreading, as well as charitable activities, andy valued variety in his life, and this can be seen through his relationship to the university (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). he was always an academically motivated student, graduating with a double major in business analytics and english. however, he also contributed to the community at notre dame. a member of the latino studies scholars program, andy served as a mentor for younger students in his years as an upperclassman, and continued to pay visits to the directors of the program even after his graduation. his desire to learn, even after graduating, paired with his desire to serve the community represent the well-rounded individual that andy became. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 having spent a fair amount of time with andy, i was always able to identify his desire to be well-rounded. however, it was this desire that brought him quite a bit of stress at points in his life. i remember discussing future career options with him, and hearing him discuss his wide variety of interests, growing anxious as he realized he did not have one singular passion that he wished to pursue. but as he got older, he began to embrace his variety of interests, doing as much as he could with every second. one of his proudest accomplishments were the works of literature he published, which included a few novels and short stories. he often credited his works to a discussion with a friend, who left him with the following takeaway: “as scary as it might be for you to pursue a career as a writer, i don’t think you’ll be satisfied until you take that risk” (“week five discernment conversation activity” by noah korth moreau fye week five). through reading his works for many years, it was never a doubt to me that he had a passion for writing. however, it was the fact that he balanced this with his other work that always impressed me. he also worked as a consultant for many years, and even later returned to schooling, where he achieved a phd in english. after achieving this milestone, he would take every chance to remind young students that “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i believe that it was through letting go of career restraints and pursuing all of his interests that andy was able to find the most joy in his life. it brought him fulfillment that was not fleeting, and taught him the importance of applying himself. another quote that he liked to reference was the following: “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it's a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (“three key questions” by fr. micheal hines moreau fye week three). he took his value for education and learning and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 applied it directly to his life, and i admire his ability to follow his interests that brought him such fulfillment. based on all that i have said, i’m sure that those of you who were not as familiar with andy are picturing him as a fully regimented and stressed individual who did not take time to himself. this assumption could not be further from the truth. as disciplined and hardworking as he was, andy always made time to rest and enjoy the simple pleasures of life. he always stressed the importance of stepping away from his work and responsibilities in order to recover: “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). some of his favorite ways to regroup were reading books and short stories, as well as catching up with friends from his hometown of san antonio, texas. a highly motivated and driven individual, i was always amazed and impressed by andy’s ability to calmly step back from his busy life, and it is something that i continue to implement in my own life. as much as i would love to drone on about all that i admired about andy, i know that he would not be pleased with this assessment of him. a self-critical individual, he always valued transparency and one’s ability to acknowledge his or her own flaws: “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). andy believed that one of the best ways to grow was through identifying his own weaknesses, of which he saw many. one that he always expressed frustration with was his ability to confront https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ others directly. while i know that he struggled with this skill, i saw him grow throughout his life and become more and more confident as he grew. as i conclude, i implore you all to remember the best parts of your relationship with andy, and the virtues that he lived by. a well-rounded and aware individual, my goal is for all of us to grow in a way that he would appreciate. whether through encountering new individuals or taking on a new task, there is room for all of us to grow, and i hope that we can all say “our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly, in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 integration 1 integration 1 march 4, 2022 a journey into the heart through the mind everyone has beliefs. political. religious. moral. everyone has beliefs. people can believe that their political party is correct. people can believe that their religion is the true religion. people can have different beliefs on what is right and what is wrong. everyone has beliefs. belief in god. belief in others. belief in themselves. everyone has beliefs, but does everyone have convictions? do people live with convictions? by definition, a belief is the acceptance that something is true or exists. a conviction is a belief that is held firmly. that is the difference. a belief is mere acceptance and acknowledgement of truth. a conviction is a belief that truly defines and inspires a person. convictions influence the way that people think and act. throughout my life, one of the most frequent questions that i am asked is, “what do you think?”. this question comes up in everyday conversations with friends and family. this question comes up in classes and homework. what do you think about this? what is your opinion on that? do you believe this? do you think that is right? everything is centered around what you believe. your convictions. this is how people learn who you are. this is how people define you. this is how you can learn about yourself. this is how you define yourself. as i was reflecting on the semester thus far, i asked myself, “what do i truly believe?”. while thinking about it, i arrived at the conclusion that in order to know my beliefs, and even further, my convictions, then i must try to know myself. an important part of knowing what your convictions are is knowing who you are because who you are influences what you believe. so, while laying in bed, i embarked on a journey through my mind to discover my convictions. who am i? this question is one that people can never truly answer, as who we are, and our image of who we are, is always in flux. so why bother trying to answer it? thinking about ourselves and taking a deep dive helps us to better understand who we are, even if we do not arrive at a concrete conclusion. one way that i try to learn about myself and who i am at this moment is through introspection, deep reflection on one’s self and actions. i think a lot, and thinking helps me to understand who i am and why i do things. when discussing introspection in her article, tasha eurich quotes psychologist, anthony m. grant, saying, “…people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness…” (eurich, 2017). this is my goal through introspection. i want to have a greater insight into myself. i believe that if i have a better understanding of myself, it will be easier to define the things in which i believe. introspection has been of great benefit to me because it revealed two things of great concern to me: one, that i have trouble defining who i am, and two, the reason why i have trouble defining who i am. i realized that i have trouble defining who i truly am because my whole life, i have been told who i was and i was shaped into what people wanted me to be. much of a person’s identity is how they were formed. people are taught a set of beliefs by their parents, teachers, coaches, and mentors. people are taught what is right and wrong by society. as i reflected on who i was, i realized that many times, it is hard for me to think for myself because i have always been told what to think, how to act, and what to believe. i am a cradle catholic and my faith is very important to me. many times, i think about how everything would be different if i was raised in a different family, culture, or country. we are formed by the environment in which we live. in his speech to west point cadets, william deresiewicz said, “so what i saw around me were great kids who had been trained to be world-class hoop jumpers” (deresiewicz, 2010), and i think this can apply to me. my whole life, i have been trained to be successful. i have been trained to follow the instructions, and if i do it correctly, i will earn a good grade and be successful. that is the way i was raised. follow orders. pay attention. get good grades. introspection showed me that i too was a hoop jumper. introspection led me to the conclusion that until i break out of that mindset of hoop jumping, until i get off the treadmill that society puts me on, until i think for myself and be myself, i will never be the best version of myself, only a fragment of that version. i ventured deeper into my mind, thinking, “how do i get off the treadmill? how do i realize what i believe?”. i began to ask myself questions about anything that came to mind. these questions were all random and some of them just led down a path that was very unproductive. i realized that i needed to ask myself more deep questions that were centered on my beliefs and values in order to gain a deeper understanding of myself. one of the questions that i found most useful in discovering what some of my convictions are was a question that fr. micheal himes posed. fr. himes asked, “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to the society at large?” (himes, unknown). although i did not answer this question directly, it led me to think about what i believed was my role in the world. i began to think. why do i get up in the mornings? why do i study hard? why do i try to be a good person? and finally, i arrived at a conclusion. i do not know all of my convictions and i could not list even a few of them. but, my one conviction that i concluded from my journey was this: i strive to be a force for good. this good does not have to be monumental. i do not have to be like mlk or fr. ted hesburgh. i do not have to be some big figure who everyone knows. i want to do good every day. in the small and big things alike. i want to be that person who people look at and think, “he is a good person”. i want to change the lives of others, not in crazy ways, but in the sense that their day was better because i interacted with them. this is my conviction. like william deresiewicz mentions in his book excellent sheep, i want to be a good person, a good student, not just a successful one (deresiewicz, 2014). i strive to be the best version of myself every day and to be a force for good in the world. i strive to do good. that is why i get up in the mornings. i want to make people happy and to help them in whatever way i can. that is why i study hard. i want to be successful so that i can help and influence more people with my profession, which is hopefully a doctor. that is why i try to be a good person, not just a successful one. i want to inspire others to be good as well. this is my conviction. be a force for good. my journey through my mind and heart was complete. or is it? not really. my journey to self-discovery is just beginning. integration 3 integration 3 the story goes on life moves very fast while in college. with all the papers, exams, labs, tutorials, and lectures it seems like there is always something to worry about. as dedicated students our minds are always focused on the next assignment or the next exam. once we get those out of the way, our mind quickly turns to the next set of assignments or exams, never giving us the time to sit back and take in all of life’s blessings. as pico iyer claims, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). as i reflect on my life thus far, and as i hope others will look at my life as well, i hope to be viewed as someone who put his everything into each challenge he faced. i also want people to view me as a compassionate person that always had the well-being of others in mind. i just hope people feel that i have a genuine care for my future and the lives of all those around me. i feel that this perspective on life is reflected by the work of change donations. “change donations is an international fundraising platform that helps nonprofits and schools grow with the power of spare change. the platform allows users to round up their purchases to the nearest dollar and donate the difference to their favorite causes” (“the domer dozen gallery” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week 2). this work by change donations reflects that what may not seem to be a lot of money to some people, might make all the difference to others. i have tried my best to offer support to others when they need it. if one of my fellow notre dame https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ peers is taking a class that i have already taken, i might offer them advice or instruction from what i previously learned. also, as much as i miss my parents and my family, i try to take a little bit of time each day to call them and check in. what might only take twenty minutes out of my busy day, might bring them joy and make them feel like i am closer to home. as i reflect on my life, i am reminded of becky clements saying, “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by becky clements moreay fye week 3). i think about the meaning of this quote quite often. although life tends to move very fast, it is important to think about the way in which you are living it on a daily basis. do your actions reflect your goals and aspirations? if you want to be one thing or achieve some things, are you doing what it takes to get there? as often as possible, i remind myself of where i would like to be later in life and it keeps me on the right path. this dedication keeps me in check and helps me get closer to my goals. i hope to be known as an outgoing person that isn't afraid to try new things or take risks. after all, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). as freshmen, we really do not know much about where we will end up or what career path we will take. i am definitely unsure about this at the moment, but am trying to keep an open-mind to as many options as possible. i hope to put myself in uncomfortable environments as this will help me to grow. another way that i have reflected on my life is through conversation with others. in the (“discernment conversation activity” by the moreau program moreau fye week 5), i talked with my mom about how she views me and some of my strengths. i realized that her and i have a lot in common and that we share many of the same values. she noted that i have a genuine care https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit for others and am often motivated by making an impact in the lives of others. this is something that i definitely see in myself and i hope to eventually work in the legal field to provide help to those that cannot afford it and need it most. sometimes we need to look within ourselves in order to be a better person and neighbor to others. “university of sydney psychologist anthony m. grant discovered that people who possess greater insight — which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves — enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i often look within myself and try to be the best version of myself. i understand that i can only control my own actions, and so i must do so to the best of my ability. by continually improving myself, i am able to offer a better friend, listener, and communicator to others. by realizing what i have to work on, i hope that others will see that i am open and willing to be vulnerable with them. this openness also allows me to let others in, not blocking everyone else out. “allowing folks into my jurisdiction requires that i dismantle what i have set up to keep them out” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). i hope that when people think about me or reflect on my life, they see someone that was always willing to let others in. i try my best to be open-minded and accepting to others, but it is also important to have some sort of a barrier to prevent you from getting constantly hurt by others. i hope people will think that i maintained a good balance of this tradeoff. i do my best to let others in and have a very welcoming heart, but it is still important that everyone proceeds with some caution. although we all continue to grow, i believe my heart and mind are currently in a good spot. http://sydney.edu.au/science/people/anthony.grant.php https://www.sbp-journal.com/index.php/sbp/article/view/1219 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/files/523808?module_item_id=167937 a tale of a life well lived every person wants their life to matter. in my 19 years, i have come to believe that for me, a life well-lived is one in which i know and follow the plan god has for my life. many people struggle with even knowing what god’s will is for their life, let alone following it. yet, i have been blessed with the gift of faith that has been nurtured by my parents. through my relationship with god, developed through prayer, bible reading, and listening to him speak through others, i have identified what my well-lived life looks like. i believe my life’s purpose is to identify the talents god has given me, to use those talents to praise god and make this world better than it was when i entered it, and to grow in my faith while allowing god’s joy and love to shine through me (personal mission statement moreau fye week thirteen). early on my parents knew i had an engineering mind. as a toddler, i was fascinated with how pulley systems and electrical switches worked. i continued to follow this passion into my middle and high school years. i loved doing projects around the house such as installing garden lighting, operating our pool, and even building my own model train village. as i’ve grown, i have found that doing projects which ultimately help others is much more enriching. it is through this that i can emulate jesus’ heart of service. as sister aletheia said, "my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time" ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). if i truly want to make this world a better place, i know i must use my god-given talents now since tomorrow is never promised. i try my best to pursue this mission by helping others with engineering-related tasks whenever i can. a few years ago, after my grandfather passed away, i volunteered to be my grandmother’s handyman by doing things like fixing her outdoor lighting and installing new wifi. during my junior and senior years of high school, i began to pursue my passion for helping to stop global warming by securing an internship at a chemical and environmental engineering lab at yale university. this amazing experience brought me an immense amount of joy and fulfillment. embracing father michael himes ("three key questions" by father michael himes moreau fye week three) suggestions on picking a field of study, i chose to enter notre dame as an engineer because of the satisfaction and joy i feel every time i engage in engineering projects. when i realized i had to declare my engineering major earlier than expected, i took this decision to prayer and ultimately felt god pointing me to civil engineering, mainly because it is through civil that i could best use my talents to help our planet. by optimally designing transit systems and infrastructure to emit the least carbon footprint possible, civil engineers have an opportunity to alleviate some of the disastrous effects of climate change on our planet. in addition, many civil engineering projects provide immediate benefits to people. knowing i have helped the lives of people in big or small ways brings me a lot of joy. to this end, i planned out specific ways i can pursue my well-lived life utilizing my engineering talents as a college student. i will be applying to go to africa with the ndseed team to build a bridge to connect an isolated community to health care and education. this summer though, i will be working on a smaller scale. my dad recently started a business and is not yet pulling a salary. to alleviate potential financial burdens, i volunteered to take care of all the house projects on my parents’ to-do list. i want to contribute to my family and praise god by using the talents he gave me to make my parents’ lives a bit less stressful. once i become an upperclassman, i plan to look into summer internships that focus on infrastructures that positively impact others. when it comes time to secure a job after graduation, i thankfully know https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40388/files/473345?module_item_id=147866 from the career development center ("navigating your career journey" by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four) that this decision does not permanently lock me into a specific field and that i still can explore what might truly bring me the most joy. god has also given me a good singing voice which i have used to praise and worship him throughout my life as a member of my high school and church choir and school musicals. my favorite singing experiences were the annual choir visits to assisted living homes to sing christmas songs to the residents. my plans had always been to join a notre dame church choir, but my freshman year has been riddled with several upper respiratory infections, a concussion, and covid. looking back, i know i could have found a way to sing in my hall’s choir despite these health setbacks. in the future, i can learn from pico iyer not to allow "distractions" ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) to deviate me from god's plan. i have always believed god wants me to use this singing talent within my faithbased community. just as "christ was anointed to bring good news to the poor, release for prisoners, sight for the blind, restoration for every broken victim," ("mission" by congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve) we also need to spread the good news. for me, i can share the good news through singing. one of my priorities for next year is to join my dorm's choir that sings during sunday mass. i know this will bring me joy and can add to the worship of my hall. as st. augustine famously stated, "to sing is to pray twice." another talent i have is my openness to other people’s views while at the same time being able to exercise a strong moral compass that helps guide me toward what is ultimately the truth. as mentioned by dr. paul blaschko, it is extremely important to avoid echo chambers. "in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us, we are losing our sense with how someone might reasonably disagree" ("how to avoid an echo chamber" by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). fortunately, i have had the opportunity so far throughout my life to be exposed to diverse beliefs and opinions. i often find these ideas very intriguing, as they can alter or deepen my understanding of topics and at times move me to action. for example, through my in-depth discussions with my mentor at yale university about methanol, i became very passionate about the issue which ultimately resulted in me presenting my work and advancing to the regeneron semifinals, a national science competition. yet, not all of my experiences with diverse viewpoints are fruitful for me. ideas that go against my faith are when i am tested the most. i’ve come to learn that sometimes what appears to be an intriguing idea or what sounds like a lot of fun, such as drinking to get drunk on weekends, is really the enemy trying to turn me away from god. just like father hesburgh, i am very committed to relying on my strong moral compass during these times to pause and make the decision for myself which will prevent me from deviating from what i know to be the truth ("hesburgh" by jerry barca moreau fye week two). in situations like this, instead of being led astray, i try my best to use the opportunity to spread god’s truth by my example. in addition to utilizing the many talents god has given me, it is extremely important to grow deeper in my faith. up to this point in my life, i believe i may have grown the most during times of suffering. it is human nature to want to avoid suffering, but i have been taught and have experienced firsthand that god promises to give meaning to suffering. sometimes it comes so he can reveal something to us, and other times to help us rely on him and trust him more. however, if i forget to approach hard times within these truths, it can be very overwhelming. as dr. jihoon kim notes, "we often focus on the things we do not have" ("5 minutes" by grotto moreau fye week six). often when we are suffering, we can become resentful of others who seem to have such a happy life. but during these hard times, i have https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 learned to look for the good because i know god makes beauty from ashes. when my grandfather recently passed away, i lost my best friend and our family lost its faithful and loving patriarch. yet this heartbreaking event actually brought me and especially my grandmother closer to the faith. it is as if we all now have a human lifeline to heaven. we miss him terribly, but there is still joy within the pain. i think the joy is rooted in my trust in god. i know where my grandfather is, and i look forward to the joy of being reunited with him in heaven. however, suffering is not something god wants us to go through alone. he wants us to lean on him, family, and friends. as pope francis notes in a virtual ted talk, we need each other to get through our everyday lives ("why the only future worth building includes everyone" by pope francis moreau fye week seven). additionally, steve reifenberg notes that we must accompany each other through our struggles ("teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together" by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i was very fortunate to have close friends who were there for me during the hardest time of my life. i later had the opportunity to be there for one of them when she was suffering from an eating disorder and was hospitalized. we spoke a lot and i was able to support her and remind her that god was also there to accompany her through this trial. even though i'm not the one suffering in situations like this, i often experience a strengthening of my faith as i hear different people's perspectives on religion and we share our beliefs. while my faith grows in times of suffering, it also blossoms in times of happiness as i’ve experienced this school year through iron sharpens iron, an interdenominational christian club. the isi community serves as a catalyst for sharpening one another in faith and building community among believers on campus. we meet every thursday night for worship, prayer, a talk, and socializing. it is through these times that i can share and discuss my faith with others and also learn about other christian religions. i plan to continue growing my faith with these amazing people for the remainder of my time here at notre dame. as noted by my parents (discernment conversation with parents moreau fye week five), one important way to live a meaningful life is to seek joy, which is something i believe i have truly focused on doing. it is quite risky to base my life just on being happy since happiness is circumstantial. joy, though, doesn't swing with my mood or emotions. the joy in my life has and will continue to strengthen in direct correlation to my trust in god. i trust him when, despite the fact that i am a sinner, he says i am seen and loved and that he wants only good for me. this fact is what truly drives my faith journey. sadly, some individuals have a difficult time believing they are loveable in the eyes of god because they think their mistakes and sins define them. as jacob walsh notes, "i think you don’t believe god loves you because you don’t love yourself...you don’t believe you can be loved" ("growing up gay and catholic" by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). my mom shared with me wisdom she received from a priest which i have stored away in my heart: "it’s not our job to decide if we are loveable; it’s god’s job and he proved that we are when he died on the cross for us." i want to make it known to everyone who feels unlovable that we have a merciful and loving god. yes, our sins may be great, but god’s love is much greater. as i continue my lifelong journey, i am committed to living out god’s will for my life because that is a life well-lived. my priorities are to use the talents god has given me to make this world a better place and to spread his love and joy. i will also continue to grow in my faith journey and hopefully attract others to jesus through my example. i am confident that this plan will be what defines my life as well-lived. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 moreau int 3 one last reflection (but like again pt. 5 the fourteenth sequel) so, i’m dead, or something. kind of a bummer. if i learned anything from the international baccalaureate program in my high school, it’s how to reflect. so before i head out, let’s do that. let’s take a look at my experience through the insightful and apt lens of my moreau first year experience class and the many lessons that we learned through the first seven weeks of our second semester. in the first week of moreau first year experience, we found balance in our lives through reading the article why we need to slow down our lives which discussed how we spend so much time intaking information that we struggle to process it all. one memorable quote that the author, pico lyer mentioned was: “whenever i finally force myself away from my desk for a day, of course, i find the opposite: the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often.” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one) this not only emphasized to me the importance of taking breaks during periods when i was working or studying, but also made me feel better about taking said breaks. knowing that going outside or hanging out with friends helped me process and recharge my batteries quieted the voice saying i need to ‘be productive’ a little bit, which was nice. in the second week of moreau first year experience, we watched the movie hesburgh, a documentary about fr. hesburgh, detailing his impact on the notre dame community and all of the communities that he was in. (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two) one of the main ideas that was a recurring theme in the film was the idea of “bridging the gap.” this idea was one that fr. hessburgh used to bring a lot of people together, and with all of these people beside him, was able to change his communities for the better. for us, we can learn from fr. hessburgh’s example: be kind to others, make friends and connections. look around, the people you see are those who have connected with me, and through me, you. wherever i’ve gone, i’m sure i’m already making more connections and meeting new friends. in the third week of moreau first year experience, we discussed what questions guide a life well lived. one of the readings provided a specific set of questions we can ask ourselves, giving one answer to the question. the questions were: “is this a source of joy? is this something that taps into your talents and gifts and uses them in the fullest way possible? and, is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three) personally, i think that everyone can define a life well lived in their own way. for some who these questions speak to and are sufficient for, by all means live life to the fullest! if you can’t quite answer the questions yet, that’s also okay. personally, i’ve been more of a drifter. sometimes i would find passion and drive to push for new adventures and aspirations, and sometimes i would put on some warm socks and nap all day. not all of us are going to change the world like fr. hesburgh, and that’s okay. doing some good here and there, helping people smile on the day to day. sometimes, that’s enough. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144736 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291?module_item_id=144741 in the fourth and fifth week of moreau first week experience, we discussed jobs, and planning our futures. although what once was the future is now the past, with plenty of future still yet to come. we explored ourselves with the vips service (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) as well as an interview with someone close to us. (i interviewed my friends and family) some of the main takeaways from these two weeks for me were that your first job probably won’t be the one you do for your entire life, and to appreciate the people around you, and those who helped you to get to where you are today. just going back, and touching base is really nice. who knows? you might also be reminded of some really nice things that you had forgotten about. i was, and it made me smile. for the sixth week of moreau first week experience, i pondered “how do we deal with daily struggles?” for me, before this week, i would try to solve the problem. this works for some things, like dirty laundry, and certain assignments, but not always. one article we read had an interesting answer to my query: asking what instead of why. (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich norway fys week six) there were times where i did this before i knew about this strategy. but learning about exactly what it was helped me be more mindful and start intentionally managing my thoughts and ideas. i also think that there are times when it is okay to take a break, and to walk away from whatever is stressing you. however, i’ve found that there is a difference between taking time to get into a better headspace and avoiding the problem altogether. take care of yourself for the seventh week of moreau first week experience, we talked about relationships. i wondered how we find the relationships that help us find a life well lived. oftentimes, it feels like we can only really see that we have one of these types of relationships once we’ve lost it. i guess this applies with more than just relationships. we don’t really realize how nice we have it until we don’t have it anymore. one example of this was in the reading for the week: “he was not my enemy. he was my friend. we worked together.” (“chapter 8_ jurisdiction” from tattoos on the heart moreau fys week seven) these words were only said after the referenced person had their life taken too early. i don’t doubt that they had a form of friendship before this comment, so why is it so hard to just say something? obviously it isn’t that easy because otherwise we would just say something. i guess it really comes down to really taking account of what we have and being thankful for what we have. the people in our lives, the sun that rises and shines even if only through clouds every day, and cookies. cookies are really tasty. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/523981?module_item_id=167999 moreau fye professor espeseth 4/28/22 a life well lived i believe that it’s important to tackle everything you do with a plan. whether it’s something small like writing out a list of items to get at the grocery store, or something far more complex like the process of applying for college. a plan helps you identify the steps you need to take to meet a goal, and for me a plan eases the anxiety of the unknown because i’ve already accounted for the worst-case scenario. this semester of moreau has helped me to realize that if i have a plan for something like a trip to the grocery store, surely, i should formulate a plan for how to live a “good” life. my personal mission statement, which was inspired by the university of notre dame mission statement, is to pursue everything in life with empathy and passion (“university of notre dame mission statement” by the university of notre dame – moreau fye week 13). my mission statement, while simple, accurately, and totally describes how i want to orient my life. during the process of refining this mission statement i considered adding more to it, making it lengthier to describe my life’s philosophy more specifically. however, after reading pico iyer’s “why we need to slow down our lives” i realized that it’s too easy to get wrapped up in the stress of everyday life. i don’t need my plan for my life to be one in which i’m constantly worried about my future. i need a plan that encourages me to carve out time to relax and give my mind time to wander in order to spark imagination and creativity (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). while i don’t want the goals that i wish to pursue to be the main cause of stress in my life, i do want them to be something that i’m motivated towards because i have passion for them. interacting with the meruelo family center for career development helped me to consider that sometimes your dreams take longer to come true than you might expect (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). this doesn’t mean that i should get discouraged or lose my passions just because things don’t go exactly according to a plan that i arbitrarily created for myself. my mission statement also identifies that i want to orient my life in service to others while acting with empathy. empathy comes through understanding and a genuine love for other people which we develop by forming relationships. by interacting with a wide diversity of people, and “widening our spheres” we are pushed to become better and more understanding versions of ourselves (“tattoos on the heart” by gregory boyle moreau fye week 7). i think that my mission statement is easily able to be implemented in a wide variety of ways that others would be able to see the impact of. i am inspired into action by the actions of father theodore hesburgh, especially his involvement in the civil rights movement (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh was passionate about establishing equality in the united states. his unrelenting work towards his goal serves as a model for how i will proceed with my life. another inspiring figure who lives by my mission statement is steve reifenberg who writes on the importance of accompaniment. when trying to do good in the world it is absolutely necessary to acknowledge that good intentions are never one sided and generosity isn’t necessarily the biggest donation or action (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). it is my personal philosophy that whenever we act with truly good intentions and we practice passion and empathy, courage will follow. courage can be difficult to muster, but when we are in a place of privilege due to education, position, race, gender, etc. we must take advantage of this and choose to do something (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week 12). my mission statement for myself seems like it would be straightforward and easy to follow, but i know there will be times during my life when it is difficult to stay true to it. something i realized i struggle with this year has been my ability to advocate for myself or put myself in a position of leadership. during the discernment conversation activity a close friend told me i have the qualities of a great leader, but that they often don’t stand out against my peers who are “louder” than me (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5). if i cannot learn to overcome this fear then it will be extremely difficult to achieve the goals that my mission sets out for me. similarly, it can be difficult to live this mission if i cannot embrace the idea of self-improvement. self-improvement is a difficult process to enact, it takes intuition, or knowing oneself, to change your mindset(“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6).. intuition is important because if i remain stuck in the same bad habits then i will never be able to improve myself into a better person. thankfully, i have the next three years at the university of notre dame to continue refining and living my mission statement. i hope that my mission will be strengthened, challenged, and even potentially changed as i continue to face adversity and grow wholistically. the university of notre dame offers an environment in which we can interact with people from all different types of backgrounds. this avoids the pitfalls that come with existing in an environment with only people who share the same viewpoint as you, also referred to as an echo chamber (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). by exposing myself to different opinions and growing into someone who considers the multiple sides to every story i hope my mission statement will grow to reflect this. the university of notre dame strives to embody the spirit of inclusion in line with the teachings of the catholic church (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10). it is comforting to know that i am living in a place that prioritizes the safety and well-being of every single one of its students regardless of their race, gender, political or religious affiliation, or any other factors. i hope being constantly immersed in this environment will only strengthen my mission in empathy and understanding. i would like to conclude this integration by acknowledging once again the significance of developing a mission statement. it’s so important to identify now what your passions are and what brings you joy because eventually our time on this earth will be over. we have a limited amount of time to make an impact on the world and i’d like to be one of the people who is remembered for enacting positive change in a chaotic and often divisive society. sister theresa altheia noble says it best, “memento mori”, remember you will die (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). life is short so be a kind person, make good friends, and rescue possums whenever you can. clancy, moreau integration clancy 1 dr. chan moreau first year seminar 29 april 2022 pursuit of a mission: challenge, passion, growth “what relationships are characteristic of a life well-lived? what does it mean to embrace humanity?” (“writing a personal mission statement activity” by moreau fye assignment moreau fye week thirteen). these are just a few questions to be considered when crafting a mission statement. throughout my first year at the university of notre dame, when working to consider such, i have come to realize that i want to live a life that uplifts others. as i attempt to live this life, i hope to orient it around faith. as i come to encounter others, i seek to increase my ability to be vulnerable and share myself with them, in order to open myself up to the possibility of true relationship and companionship. further, it is intimidating to look at the issues the world today faces. from hunger to homelessness to the climate crisis to war, it feels like the world is constantly crumbling before us. however, these next three years i am eager to learn as much as i can to equip myself with the tools to have a career that works toward justice, in some form. overall, i aspire to find ways in which i, in my career and in my off time, can contribute to a better tomorrow, and do so with a basis in faith and genuine relationships. to break down my mission, one challenge i envision encountering is trying to do everything, and spreading myself too thin. here at notre dame, i already find myself getting occasionally overwhelmed when i consider what is next. one specific example is that i applied to be a commissioner in my dorm, and i accepted the position of leading faith group as a spirituality commissioner, as well as being the dorm’s service commissioner. recently, i https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit clancy 2 received an email including an application to lead another faith group, and saw a fascinating sustainability internship on the job board. how do i choose which groups to give my time and energy towards? i am not sure, and i recognize that this is something that i will need to reflect on in order to be successful in my mission, as by stretching too thin, i fear losing the genuine connections i am seeking. something helpful in mitigating this, is what my mom said during our discernment conversation, remembering that “... you can’t do everything for other people.” (discernment conversation with my mom moreau fye week five). remembering that i am one person, and that there are other people to support me, as well as others seeking their own justice endeavors is comforting. to continue in the sphere of life being busy, a key part of my mission is faith. consequently, i look to engage in meaningful reflection. one example of such is taking time to ask questions like “what regrets do you need to let go of?” (“pause for reflection” by mcwell moreau fye week one). questions like this, along with prayer, can guide me to ensure that i stay on the right track. however, during self-reflection, “asking why appeared to cause the participants to fixate on their problems and place blame instead of moving forward in a healthy and productive way.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a right way)” by tasha eurich phd moreau fye week six). this study shows that i will need to be careful with the way i engage in such routines. acknowledging what i am feeling without criticism and questioning will not be easy, but it will be important to remain vulnerable, especially with regards to being open with myself and with god. furthermore, while writing my eulogy, i reflected on prayer life and how it is not about perfection. (eulogy by moreau fye week eight). i noted how at one rosary in particular, i worried less about being distracted, and embraced the forgiving and understanding nature of god. the next three years at notre https://docs.google.com/document/d/1gi9_cyzgdwq9u1fwm_uizml7y_teycnptm_o44vpzsq/edit?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1c0videbq7dteet-effwlbxwc3a4lt1maten3kmqh09m/edit?usp=sharing clancy 3 dame, i hope to continue attending prayer services like this, as it takes practice growing in understanding for oneself’s imperfections. while i think the mission statement i have crafted here begins to illustrate how i hope to go through life, there are other elements to note. one such sentiment is living each day with patience, but also an understanding that every day is precious. one quote that exemplifies such is, “‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). consequently, recognizing our own mortality, in addition to acknowledging our humanity can be a beautiful thing. further, tying to my goal of pursuing justice, it will be important to emphasize this acknowledgement of humanity. “how wonderful would it be if solidarity, this beautiful and, at times, inconvenient word, were not simply reduced to social work, and became, instead, the default attitude in political, economic and scientific choices, as well as in the relationships among individuals, peoples and countries.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven. i hope to incorporate what pope francis is suggesting in this quote in my life. instead of only considering others when doing service, i hope to consider, and uplift the voice’s of others, whether it be in career, community, or just daily life. as mentioned earlier, i hope to cultivate meaningful relationships throughout my life. one person who was great at doing this was father hesburgh. “and after a few hours of fishing, even a segregationist and a black civil rights lawyer can get along. once they trusted each other, they were able to do tremendous work.” (“hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh was able to bring people from completely https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 clancy 4 different backgrounds together to have a fruitful conversation. especially in conversations about justice, there can be pushback in saying that it is not their problem. so being able to create these conversations which can articulate the connections between people and create common ground is critical, and something i would like to be able to do. furthermore, the world is very polarized today. one quote that critiques this polarization is, “ instead of hating the other side, instead of hating a random person who says they're republican or says they're democrat, they would say, hmm, is this a neighbor that i can convince to move in my direction?” (“passion isn’t enough” by shankar vedantam moreau fye week eleven). this ties into conversations i had in my solidarity and the city seminar, as it is important to realize that we are all humans. regardless of which way your life has taken you, and mine has taken me, we both have emotions and experiences that have shaped who we are. overall, i hope to be open to conversations with anyone, learn from them, and work to avoid jumping to hate, as well as encouraging others to do the same. something else i see being difficult in living out my mission is that relationships are complicated. “you can ask him [god] to show you, though. and you can pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten). this quote is when walsh was writing about advice given to him when he did not feel loved, by himself or god. it shows that our relationships are ways that god provides us with support. in my experience, when relationships get difficult, it is because there is a lot of love involved. i hope to work to see that love, even when it is not clear amidst arguments. additionally, “‘the word compassion is very beautiful,’ gutiérrez said. ‘compassion is not only to suffer for the other, but it is also to be in sympathy with another.’ it means to be close to the other, to accompany the other.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit clancy 5 steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). this ties into the concept of relationships, in that in order to seek justice and form the bonds i hope to in this life, i will need to ensure i am constantly aware of what those around me are going through, and look for ways i can be with them and better understand their humanity. lastly, dean cole stated, “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it.” (“'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). the sentiment about the position each of us is in is something i hope to keep in mind, not only at notre dame, but as i progress through life. how has the lord put me in a position to act for justice? to conclude, i recognize that since the first year at notre dame has changed me so much, the next three years are likely to as well. “after you leave nd, some of the details (like choosing a major) will change, but the core elements remain the same: learn about yourself, explore careers, reflect, & take action.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this quote acknowledges that throughout life, i will be constantly questioning and learning about myself, but i hope for the core elements of faith, companionship, and justice, always resonate, regardless of where life takes me. https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ theodore helm moreau fye 10102 april 29, 2021 finding purpose: expansion as a mission statement memories, experiences, words, culture, stories, faces, and places all make us who we are. our identities are all woven together through a core component—a mission statement. it not only forms our judgment, but also shapes every decision we make in our day to day lives. my mission is to expand; this expansion is twofold, both in terms of personal growth, as well as growth with others. i will seek to challenge my current beliefs through acquisition of new knowledge, maintaining an inquisitive and skeptical attitude and filter new information using critical thinking. i also believe that my community should consistently question itself too. first and foremost, this includes re-evaluating what community means, but also who this community is made for. coming to notre dame, i was randomly placed into breen-phillips hall, whose motto is “best place, best people”. is it truly as good of a place as it claims to be? who is it the best place for? is it the best place for a student who is almost always the only person of color in the room? rather than settling for what is “good enough”, i believe every community should welcome constructive criticism with open arms, listen to its members, and review past mistakes, rather than assuming what is best for everyone based on only one point of view. while i am transferring out of breen phillips to live with one of my closest friends in flaherty, i plan on being involved with dorm commissioners, specifically, the diversity commissioners, in order to ensure incoming freshman and current students feel safe, included, and welcomed. now that i have spent a year in residential life, i understand what it feels like to be a minority in a dorm that makes little to no effort to acknowledge differences and to bridge them, so i now have a variety of ideas i can work to incorporate (“exploring a life well-lived career development reflection” activity by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). if the notre dame community prides itself on educating both the mind and the heart, then students are responsible for opening both, despite any fear that may surface. i will seek to meet people from all walks of life; this includes people from different ages, countries, ethnicities, sexual orientations, life goals, abilities, in order to stretch my worldview of what i know to be true. while i am a minority in some aspects of my identity, i simultaneously hold a range of privileges—i am straight and cisgender, i have no physical or mental disabilities, i am a documented citizen, i have two biological parents who are still alive, i can afford a college education, etc. in an effort to become more educated on groups that i am not part of, i plan on joining more clubs whose mission is to uplift those who are often underrepresented or discriminated against (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7). i will seek discomfort by engaging in activities that make me uncomfortable or that i deem to only be achievable by a more developed version of myself. i will consistently go outside of my comfort zone in order to reach my potential. put simply, i believe that i grow through discomfort. this means actively seeking out situations that are outside of my comfort zone in order to shine light on the weaknesses i need to strengthen. this root belief was the very reason why i decided to enroll at notre dame. i do not represent the university’s typical demographic; i am neither white, nor catholic or part of the christian faith altogether. however, by purposefully choosing to immerse myself in an environment that is unfamiliar to me, i am able to exercise essential qualities such as open-mindedness, courage, and perseverance. in addition, this discomfort stimulates my curiosity as i am constantly learning new things about other ways of living life, as well as meeting new parts of myself that are exposed as i am put in new situations. (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5) i value my boundaries and do not allow individuals who cross them to stay in my life. throughout the course of this year i let in a huge influx of new people into my life. while this allowed me to meet new people very easily, i lost sight of the standard i hold myself to and did not filter people according to my values, which led to toxic friendships that i quickly ended. moving forward, i plan on continuing to meet new people and put myself out there, but with more caution as i am now very aware of how the people we surround ourselves with impact the quality of our days. (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). the expression ‘you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with’ deeply resonates with me and i intend to keep it in mind in the next three years. in addition, i find it especially important to challenge the claim that it is selfish to refuse to tolerate less than what we deserve, because ultimately, relationships are meant to help us grow. and perhaps one way to forge life-giving relationships is to foster a healthy one with ourselves, first. i will embody patience, kindness, and respect along the way. i will be patient with myself and others as we struggle with obstacles along the way, such as belief that we are not capable, not enough, or not worthy enough. in addition, i value my worth as an individual as intrinsic and unrelated to any achievements or shortcomings i may experience, and the same applies to the people around me. although i recently joined a psychology lab i’ve wanted to be part of for months, i congratulate myself for the hard work that led to this moment but i do not let this accomplishment completely dictate how i view myself (“domer dozen” by notre dame alumni association moreau fye week two). in other words, if i had gotten rejected from the lab i would not have beat myself up for it or viewed my worth any differently. i recognize that i am more than my past, more than my mistakes, and i instead embody compassion to continue to become the best version of myself that i can be. i plan to use my mission statement to keep making mistakes, keep learning, and keep learning along the way, all to ultimately be the best version of myself that i can be along with my classmates. and in order for us to truly do so, it is essential that we show up as we are, fully imperfect. this, to me, is a life well-lived. integration three eulogy: what i learned from my father dear friends and family, we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of timothy, my father. many of you here today may remember my father as a mentor, a companion, and a good friend. to me, my father was more than i could explain. he was my teacher, my model, my caretaker, and my cornerstone. as a kid, he embodied everything that i wanted to be. when my playmates and i were playing the game role play, i always wanted to play my father, because in my mind, my father was way cooler than superman and tik tokers. i mean, who besides my dad would actually go out of their way to spend three hours explaining utility functions to a random five year old at the playground? (laughter) anyways, i wanted to take the time here to talk about three of the most important things i learned from him. the first thing was to take the necessary time to reflect. i heard from a ted talk somewhere that “the more facts come streaming in on us, the less time we have to process any one of them” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). that couldn’t be more true for me when i first got to college. during that time, i was overwhelmed with school work i mean i was practically hunkering down in the basement of hesburgh’s library for days on end trying to finish assignments that were due in a couple of hours. i focused on memorizing so much of the things that i was learning that i neglected to spend the time actually thinking about what i was learning. however, in those dark moments, i would always remember the times my father told me to breathe, take a step back, and examine my emotions more closely. as tasha, another ted speaker (and yes i know i mentioned a ted speaker already) puts it, “at times, asking what instead of why can force us to name our emotions” ("the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). that is exactly what my father had told me. of course it is easy to see why i was so frustrated i couldn’t help but blame my emotions on school work. but dad taught me a different way. he helped me to focus on taking the time to reflect and ask “what am i feeling right now,” which grounds me in the moment, allowing me to calm myself down and float above the waves of emotions. the second thing that my father taught me was to discover my own unique self. i remember when i was going through my first year of college, i was really unsure about the path i wanted to take. there were so many opportunities at the career center at notre dame that i didn’t know how to start. that, though, wasn’t the end of it. one night, i asked dad how he found his career. instead of explaining his experiences though, he quoted a question from a priest which says “what brings you joy?” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). upon hearing that, i didn’t have any words to say. i knew i had to take the time to dig deeper. after a couple minutes, i said, “well, i guess truth and liberty are ideas that give me joy.” (conversation moreau fye week five). although i couldn’t see his face, i knew that he was smiling on the other side of the phone. “well, that’s a good start,” he said, “as a student, i had somebody ask me the same question. at the time, i was really afraid of failing, afraid of trying new things. however, my mentor encouraged me to go out and explore, and that’s how i found my passion in economics.” that day, i think i learned what it means to look inward, and what it means to take risks. “the only way to know about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ center for career development moreau fye week four). whether it’s seeing dad fail spectacularly at being a volunteer esl teacher or me trying to come up with a startup, i learned that life is full of failure but in the meantime we learn more about ourselves and develop our character. speaking about character, the third thing my dad has taught me was to develop my character. i remember as a child, dad would show me documentaries of great, famous people like jesus, father pete, and father hesburgh. that really had a deep impact on me as i had so many role models i could follow. for example, i once saw on a documentary of hesburgh that “ted was a pontifex, a bridge builder” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). although i didn’t know what pontifex meant at the time i knew it was something important. i wanted to be a great man like father hesburgh, like my father. once i told dad what kind of a man i want to be, he just calmly replied, “son, being great isn’t about being first, it’s about seeing eye to eye with others who are different than you.” that struck me. at first i didn’t understand it, but later i read from a book that echoed the same sentiments wherein it says “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention.” (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle moreau week fye 7). many of us are not called to greatness. indeed as i got older i started to realize how ordinary my father was. in his life, he never moved mountains, but he always treated others with respect and kindness. he never closed himself off from an opportunity to engage with others. he was a different kind of role model than jesus or father pete. he was great in his ordinariness, and here i stand as witness to his kindness and mercy. as i conclude my eulogy i am sure many of you have shared similar experiences with mine. let us remember, then, the everyday moments where he shined and made this world a better place with his sincerity and kindness. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/modules/items/149229 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/523775/download?download_frd=1 moreau integration 3 de leon 1 leonardo de leon professor anthony polotto fys 10102 04 march 2022 the kind dreamer today, we honor the life of a good man. a man who laughed, loved, and most importantly hoped. a man that did so little, yet did so much at the same time. although he was never aware of it, his small acts of kindness went unnoticed and everyone who joins us here today can vouch for the impact he has left behind in our lives. he would of course deny such statements and say it wasn’t a big deal. however, i hope he knows how much his simplicity inspired the lives of many. today, we remember the life of leonardo de leon. leonardo had an undeniably cherished talent. although many of you might think it was his great intelligence, it might surprise you what truly was the most admirable trait of this man. leonardo was quite the stubborn fellow as many of you can agree, but it was that resilience that made him stand out. his ability to learn and improve was unlike no other. this man could fall hard on his knees. many of us have witnessed his infamous mid-life crisis scenes. however, just as we would see him so desperately stressed out, we would turn around and before we knew it, he was back on his feet ready for his next endeavor. he knew how to learn from his mistakes and would embrace his failures. he admitted when he was wrong. of course he had pride, but he knew that this was the right approach in life. they say that “it is only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyermoreau fye one). only through this process was leonardo able to constantly become a better artist at his https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ de leon 2 leonardo de leon professor anthony polotto fys 10102 04 march 2022 profession. he was great at practicing self-reflection. once he saw where he was going wrong, he was able to devise a plan and his stubborn head would reach yet another breakthrough. he knew that, “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential.” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurichmoreau fye week 6) leonardo thrived under this mentality for he didn’t beat himself up for every mistake. he instead owned up to each flaw and thought of ways to overcome his negative experiences. he knew that his potential in life would be hindered if he broke his head over his failures. this habit was a huge part of his success both in his personal life and his career. i remember the day he received his medical license. we all knew that moment would come someday where we would see the dreams of a little boy become a reality. we knew that his passion for helping others would be reflected in the career he chose to pursue. of course, it also helped that he carried a big brain with him. “the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey by ccdmoreau fye week 4). we can all agree that leonardo nailed it with his job as a physician. he was able to open up his own clinic where worked towards ameliorating the well-being of the patients he cared so much for. his love for science also assisted him throughout his journey. he was passionate about learning more of the human body and ways to improve your health. he even loved fitness and somehow managed to squeeze in his gym sessions into his busy schedule. we may never know if leonardo was the best doctor, but we can be happy to know that he was https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ de leon 3 leonardo de leon professor anthony polotto fys 10102 04 march 2022 the best doctor he could ever be. when it comes to his personal life, we can agree that leonardo never had huge groups of friends swarming around him. nonetheless, the few people he did have, he cared for deeply and developed intimate, lifelong relationships with. he was indeed, “a person who prioritizes unity and unconditional care for others” (moreau fye week 5). he loved his family and friends more than anything in the world. he was always attentive to their needs and was always willing to assist them in any way possible. he was a selfless man who in-part sacrificed his efforts to make his loved ones smile because their happiness meant the world to him. he didn’t discriminate with the relationships he built either. he had random friends that he met from all over the world. it didn’t matter how different their backgrounds were, leonardo always found something special to bond over for and to grow together under. he knew that, “we have a chance, sometimes, to create a new jurisdiction, a place of astonishing mutuality, whenever we close both eyes of judgment and open the other eye to pay attention” (“chapter 8 jurisdiction”moreau fye week 7). leonardo made sure to always maintain an open mind towards every person he met. he acknowledged that their say mattered, no matter if they disagreed along the way. everyone deserves to be treated with kindness for the people that they are and no one should be afraid to be themselves around others. he was truly an advocate for inclusivity. he learned this major lesson from his time studying at notre dame. one of the major missions of this university was to give every student an equal opportunity to have a voice and representation. they created a model explaining how “at a university, you can’t censor the ideas https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/523831?module_item_id=167962 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/files/523831?module_item_id=167962 de leon 4 leonardo de leon professor anthony polotto fys 10102 04 march 2022 if they disagree with your own” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2) ). through these teachings, leonardo learned to be more welcoming and accepting of the people around him regardless of the apparent differences. leonardo knew what it was like to feel alone and thus was always there to listen to others. he gave each and every person he met the same level of respect and refused to turn anyone away because of previous experiences. he was a safe haven for many. ultimately, the life of leonardo de león was certainly one that was well-lived. he spent his best years working on his most passionate projects in medicine, while caring and cherishing the moments he spent with his loved ones. he never let any unfortunate event change his mind about life and instead used them to fuel his pursuit for a more accomplished life. although he was a hopeful man, he understood that, “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the bright and shiny is superficial and inauthentic” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by the new york timesmoreau fye week 3). that’s why he cherished every shortcoming he experienced because he knew those were inevitable parts of life. however, it is up to us to choose what to do with the lessons learnt. may he rest in peace. 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https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html remembering my roommate and role model when you lose a loved one, there are many moments of grief you experience as you learn to live your life without them. while today we mourn the loss of our dear abigail, we also celebrate the life she lived and the joy she brought us each day we shared with her. abby would not want us to mourn her, but rather celebrate her, therefore, the reception will be a moment to share our favorite memories about our girl. she was a bright light in all of our lives and would never want to be remembered as old, but rather, vivacious, and quick-witted. as she would say, her prime years were her twenties, hence her prayer card and program photo being from the 2020s, before the wrinkles. her beauty had nothing to do with her good genes and rigorous skincare routine, but her wisdom, insane sense of humor, and wicked dance moves. she brought the party with her wherever she went. during our college years, we were attached at the hip, starting out as randomly assigned roommates and quickly became the best of friends. she became the little sister i never had, and it deeply saddens me to be standing here before you, knowing that she passed before me. i would give anything, do anything to get just one last abby hug and hear her contagious laugh once more. abby was a go-getter with an insane work ethic. i quite honestly thought that she was insane. back in our time at notre dame, i was an english and global affairs major, and she was a neuroscience and spanish major on the pre-med track. as she studied for hours and hours in the library each day, i would take breaks from writing my papers to bring her snacks. every time i found her with the same huge smile on her face, head buried in a spanish literature textbook or laser focused on her organic chemistry problems. i remember her complaining to me about how smart other kids were and how she felt like she didn’t belong in the same classroom as them. abby was not afraid to put in more time and effort than other kids. she never shied away from a challenge. after all of the stress and self-doubt, my incredibly smart sidekick always came home and yelled, “maggieeee, i did it! i got an a!” i never doubted her for a second. each and every time i gleamed with pride, and we celebrated to our theme song, “big energy.” despite her hours and hours of work, abby never let her stress consume her and juggled her responsibilities with such grace. i’ll never forget the day i was telling her about how stressed i was, with an economics exam and 3 english papers due on the same day. “maggie,” she said, “gandhi once said ‘this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour. i’ll have to meditate for two.’ you’re going to be just fine mags. you have to relax a bit if you really want to be productive!” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 moreau fye week one). she was right. everything did end up just fine. she had an insane ability to see the importance of balance in life. she never lost sight of what was important to her and always maintained a sense of peace and joy wherever she went. she was too busy appreciating the way that the woman at the front of the dining hall smiled at her every morning, the fleeting moments of sunshine in south bend, the drums playing in the background at milkshake mass, and all of the beauty of life, to get too upset when obstacles arose in her life. she appreciated everything she had immensely. (“5 minutes” by aria swarr https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-godallowsuffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 – moreau fye week 6). abby always took breaks in between studying to dance to mama mia https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41088/modules/items/146492 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allowsuffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allowsuffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 songs, she never skipped her essential daily workout, and every time she saw someone she knew, she would stop and check on them to make sure they were doing well. abby had an incredible gift for making people feel special and loved. she reminded me a lot of father hesburgh, an important figure in the notre dame and global community. she could take two people who hated each other, put them in the same room together, crack some jokes to get the conversation going, and suddenly a sense of connection, understanding, and appreciation flowed throughout the room. she wanted everyone to at least try to understand and appreciate each other, and she went out of her way to make it happen. (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malle https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-45498581-ab9500c9ecd9 – moreau fye week two). abby always told me that she just wanted to help people and she used her talents to do just that. she dedicated her life to being the best daughter, wife, best friend, and doctor that she could be. she always loved biology and neuroscience more than anything and paired with her incredible ability to make people feel comfortable around her, i knew she was meant to be a doctor. while many people go into the medical field for the pay that it comes with, abby cared about her job and all of her patients far more than any of the money that she earned. (“exploring a life well-lived, career development reflection” mereulo family center for career development, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ – moreau fye week four). abby was always aware that she was going to die one day and lived with an eagerness to get out and do as much as she could in the time she had. (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die,” by ruth graham https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html moreau fye week three). https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html her love for medicine allowed her to help so many women in the united states, but she still wanted to do more. she took off traveling, using her love of spanish to impact lives all over the world. i had to practically drag her out of guatemala, and without my pleads for her to return, she absolutely would have stayed. i remember back in college when she was so worried about her career path and constantly questioning whether or not she would ever be able to make it. (“week five discernment conversation,” https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvxu4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing moreau fye week five). thank goodness she stuck with it because it was truly her calling. she transformed the lives of thousands of people with her passion for medicine and forming genuine connections with others. abby saw the best in everyone around her. when she met someone who disagreed with her, she shrugged her shoulders and considered their opinion before shooting back with her own. she lived with an open mindset and always wanted to learn, adapt, and grow. pope francis once stated, “tenderness means to use our eyes to see the other, our ears to hear the other, to listen to the children, the poor, those who are afraid of the future.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone” his holiness pope francis, ted conferences, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript moreau fye week seven). abby really embodied this quote, and constantly opened her heart to strangers without hesitation. my best friend was a lot of things. she was humorous, witty, intelligent, and entertaining, but most importantly she was selfless. she dedicated herself to serving others, while spreading her contagious positivity and laughter wherever she went. i know we will all miss her greatly and know she is dancing like crazy in heaven right now, making everyone around her laugh. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript capstone integration moreau fye april 29, 2022 to learn to learn throughout moreau this semester, i have spent much time reflecting on where my life is headed. over the course of the class, i have come to the conclusion that i do not yet know what i want in life. so, when i contemplated my mission statement, i realized that what i value most is simply learning, and that i can use the knowledge i find to figure out the future later. with that in mind, i have come to understand the value of community within learning and the need for communication to drive a community forward. my mission statement is as follows: as i continue in life, it is my mission to recognize the importance of learning and intellectual discussion in my life and use it to drive me toward finding solutions for global issues. i seek to stay open to opportunities that frighten me and to remain unswayed in my confidence and core values despite hardship i may face. i will look toward risk with more excitement than i have had in the past and strengthen my internal confidence when i feel that others will judge me. i will discover when i can discover, lead when i can lead, encourage when i can encourage, support when i can support, and always attempt to achieve and maintain a content state of mind to ensure i can continue on the next day. on my mission to expand my ingenuity in the face of adversity, i will remember the importance of connectedness within a community and do my best to maintain relationships, both challenging and loving, to strengthen my place in society and ensure i can keep moving forward with innovation for the world. the most important part of my learning mission statement is recognizing the necessity of reaching out into the community to grow. in week nine, we learned that “we need to walk together and learn together, and maybe, together, envision and create something better” (“a learning journey together” by steven reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). in this scenario, you are able to share ideas and learn from each other, so both people are able to grow, which i think is important. in order to grow as people, we also have to reach out and help those suffering around us. as reifenberg argues, it is so much easier to help and be helped when you are accompanied by the other because you can accomplish things together. additionally, in week seven, we focused on relationships, something people do not always take the time to develop. (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). these relationships are a key aspect of learning because no one person knows everything. even if you have no shared interests to discuss, you can still learn from each other about how to develop personal relationships and how to be successful in living. one big life interest of mine is helping with the energy crisis and being part of the move toward renewable energy. my mission statement directly applies because i barely know anything about energy right now, and i am so excited to integrate more into the community to learn. i joined the energy studies minor and the student energy board to get more engaged and to learn from my peers. i met with anne pillai many times to discuss, and she mentioned that the minor shares my same values; the minor is a chance for people from all majors and backgrounds to come together and discuss energy. there is no better way to learn than through intellectual discussion with everyone involved, and i am so excited to be a part of this. additionally, as i use my environmental knowledge to help those struggling in the world, i can learn from them about https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41005/files/523987?module_item_id=168024 the environment and about energy in their community to expand my knowledge and further understand how to best attack the issue of climate change through energy. as i look more and more toward innovation, i am proud to be part of the notre dame community. among many other benefits, the notre dame community comes with a huge network of collaborators and innovators ready to help lead the world, which can help me in my mission statement. as jennifer tank from h2o@nd said, “notre dame is ideally positioned to be an international leader for innovative water-related research” (moment to see, courage to act symposium summaries – moreau fye week twelve). the quote speaks to why notre dame should involve itself in this important research, which applies to notre dame being in a position to be a world leader for important change in general and how being involved in the community can help me to learn from and engage further in the world. i think it is effective and courageous to use tools like notre dame’s position in society to better get your message across, as tank and others involved in the symposium did. having these resources and gaining the confidence to use them will definitely support me in my mission. the final piece of my mission statement has to do with recognizing my own boundaries and keeping myself mentally and physically healthy to be able to help save the world. “the world health organization has been widely quoted as stating that ‘stress will be the health epidemic of the twenty-first century’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). i definitely need to take time to relax and not get overwhelmed. additionally, i have come to realize other mental health issues that i have been dealing with. as i go forward, i will pay more attention to them to make sure i am living my best life. while there is pressure to work and neglect personal mental health, it is so important to pay attention to my own needs to avoid putting myself in a situation that i may not come out of. as i have learned https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ more about how my own mind works, i have come to recognize the role emotion plays in the lives of everyone. in an interview, eitan hersh said, “in real politics, anger, righteous anger and emotion, are something you leverage into action” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain media – moreau fye week eleven). many times, i have seen people judging others’ characters based off of a political label and refusing to have a discussion about their actual ideals. growing in wisdom, as i hope to do through my mission statement, is learning to instead use that frustration to drive a conversation to educate the other person or to educate yourself. it is important for everyone to recognize how their emotions play into their life and to use them for good, as i hope to do. overall, my mission is to continue to grow in wisdom by reaching out into my community and learning from others, all while maintaining my own mental health, to eventually lead me to help change the world for the better. this mission comes with a huge interest in the environment and sustainable energy, as well as a newfound discovery and appreciation for the abnormalities in the way my mind functions. as i continue on my journey at notre dame and beyond, i am excited to see where life takes me and am certain that i will continue to love learning as i go on. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ untitled document teach well and inspire well to live well throughout this semester i have found ways to deepen my self-knowledge, to define my beliefs, and learned what i need to pursue a life well lived. this is my guide to how to achieve such a life, and i am not saying it is correct, but i think this will help me successfully live a life we would all want. i start with a journey of self discovery, and that can mean literally being alone with only oneself, also known as an “internet sabbath.” because “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). by being alone with one’s thoughts, you can learn many things about yourself. although, “the more time the participants spend in introspection, the less self-knowledge they have” (”the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). sometimes it appears, and you realize that something is not like you, or you know how you act and learn more about yourself. another way to discover oneself is by seeking discomfort, doing things you would not normally do can teach you many new things. even though we must care about ourselves, we must also help people, and love doing it, and helping can be done in different ways: “faith, service, learning, and work” (“young alumni recognition initiative” by youngnd board moreau fye week 2). through faith we can help people who need it, give those people hope. service and work are pretty similar, both refer to doing physical work and helping others directly. finally, helping through learning is one of the most powerful ones. learning helps make the future a better place, it is what shapes people, and it is really important. especially helping without expecting anything in return and with only the objective of helping. just like professor steve reifenberg said “those limitations, though, in no way tempered my vision of the many plans i had to improve the lives of the children i had not yet met at the domingo savio orphanage” “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). we should all be confident in the way we live, we must have “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). i believe that we must live happy and confident in ourselves. i laugh a lot for example, and my friends think it is weird that i do that, but i see it from a different point of view. i see it as a gift, i find things to laugh about when there aren’t, and i always try to make people laugh. joy comes from your confidence in your life, of how you are living it, you feel it when you are living how you would want to. having a plan is also a large part of the rule book to living a good life. “planning your career is much like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week 4). i plan on becoming an architect, one of the best ones hopefully, and that way of seeing the future, that hope, gives me something to look towards, something to work hard for. learning to accept when one is wrong is also a large part of living a life well lived. i had a conversation with some friends (moreau fye week 5), and they all basically told me the same thing, that i should stop procrastinating and playing around, and that i should work on my https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit homework more often, and i knew it inside, but now they helped me and i am really trying to change that. it is also okay to learn from other people, from the good things they do and the bad things. like pope francis said, “in order to do good, we need memory, we need courage and we need creativity” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). remembering the good things and the bad things will help you know what things you truly appreciate others doing, and will give you a reason to do them yourself. another thing we must not fear is change, “i want people to also know that their hearts are breakable, and it’s a very good thing, that it’s worth celebrating because it allows you to grow and expand. and you get to put your heart back together.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week 10). change and loss will make you grow, and will help you build into a better person. like dr. paul blaschko, “my parents raised me and my siblings in a politically engaged environment,” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). i believe this environment of a hidden dictatorship in nicaragua has built me into who i am, and instead of living hiding from it, i embrace it and learn from it. we must all embrace our environment, our home, and use it to become who you are. my mission statement, my mission in life is to do the best i can to live a life well lived. i want to do all of the things i listed in this integration. i want to transform my mind and my heart to become the best person i can be. i want people, the ones that know me at least, to look at me and to see me as a good example of what to follow. i want to pass down all of the things i will do, including helping people and being confident of who i am, and that people try to do the same. “the mission is not simple, for the impoverishment we would relieve are not simple.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by congregation of holy cross moreau fye week 12) https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ microsoft word week 8 integration three.docx a reflection of the past i am a woman who constantly looked for opportunities. i would always be busy doing something, whether it was work, being with friends, or just other things i could take care of. i would try my best to help my friends when needed and would do everything i could to help the people around me. sometimes, i would get too caught up with everything to the point where i would forget to take time for myself. “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer, ted – moreau fye week one). once i remind myself of this quote, i would encourage myself to slow down and to take time for myself. back to freshman year of undergraduate at notre dame, time went by so fast and i would forget to take some time to rest. before i knew it, i would easily get mentally and physically exhausted. this was something that i was forced to learn. throughout freshman year, i realized that i needed to change the direction of my life to something that would not only be worthwhile for me, but for the people around me. i remember looking back to a page of notre dame alumni and seeing a person named zhu, from china. “in 2013, zhu began his career in environmental conflict mediation, managing over 50 municipal projects in tianjin, china, to improve water quality, reduce pollution, and conserve wetlands. after matriculating to notre dame, an internship took him to east africa in 2018, where he conducted research on peacebuilding with act change transform in nairobi, kenya, and led him to co-found pumbaa eco, china’s first environmental social innovation consultancy” (“gallery: domer dozen” by notre dame – moreau fye week two). reading his life story reminded me to keep on putting my goals ahead of me and to carve my path in that direction. i realized through my undergraduate year that i did want to leave footprint in this world by helping my community in whatever career i end up in. at the end of the day, whatever success i’ve achieved will not really be fulfilling if i’m the only one who’s affected by it. the art of sharing and giving gives a feeling of satisfaction like no other. even when i was young, it was not uncommon for me to have thoughts about death: what it entails, what life looks like after death, and what it means for me right now. through my religious perspective, i didn’t see death as an ending but a new beginning for a life with god. with that perspective in mind, i strived to live a life of meaning and one where i could smile back on at the end. being able to identify what i enjoyed doing and what i was skilled in doing was key in doing that. “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the “bright and shiny” is superficial and inauthentic. “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she said. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die (links to an external site.)" by ruth graham, ny times – moreau fye week three). being able to explore through the different clubs and organizations present at notre dame had help me discover the things that i was passionate in. “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow.” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau first year experience course – moreau fye week four). throughout my self-discovery of who or what i wanted to become, i encountered different obstacles, including a realization of a new passion that made me want to change majors at notre dame. i remember thinking that it was such a big deal and that all the plans i had for the future would be ruined. however, when looking back, it was simply god’s redirection in my life. it is naturally that changes will occur in your life, and it doesn’t mean that it’s bad. sometimes, passions and interests change, and that is part of one’s self-discovery. i learned through the journey that we must embrace the change and recognize that those changes reflect who we are now. i remember interviewing my mother on questions about myself. it was to get her opinion on things personal to me, like what made me happy, what i would do in the future, what issues intrigued me, etc. i remember at that time how my mother answered things that made me think about myself, not because they were offensive, but because they were true, but i had never thought about it myself. i think the questions that i asked at that time were quite deep and my mother and i had a deep conversation together. she told me at the end of the interview that one thing she wants me to know even though it will be hard to listen to is that “you can’t always have everything that you want”. my mother knew how i’ve always gotten what i want but in life, it doesn’t always go that way. i’ve experienced the truth of that statement throughout my year at notre dame and i knew then that it shouldn’t feel like failure, but it should feel like god showing me a new path. my mother definitely played a huge part in my discernment. one thing my dad would often say to me whenever i found myself stuck in a hole was “try introspecting and self-reflecting”. thinking back, the art of self-reflecting can be useful, but it can also lead to more negative emotions. sometimes, by simply self-reflecting, we will not get the answer or solution we need. a different word that might be more appropriate is practicing selfinsight, which allows a person to think about the ‘what’ questions to understand themselves and why things have happened the way they have. this goes accordingly with the quote “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences – moreau fye week six). the time i spent at notre dame has taught me that in terms of academic challenges / problems in social relationships, it is important to practice selfinsight rather than self-reflection, because it can help us reach the solution we need, rather than dwell in the negative emotions. my time at notre dame has taught me what it meant to be a christian that can live a life well-lived. “tenderness is the path of choice for the strongest, most courageous men and women. tenderness is not weakness; it is fortitude. it is the path of solidarity, the path of humility” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone (links to an external site.) by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences – moreau fye week seven). it had always been one of my principles to live a life where i can be an exemplary christian to others: to love, to care, and to do good towards one another. having met many other people with that kind of mindset at notre dame had encouraged positivity within me that such a thing as peace within this world might be attainable. during my time at notre dame, i’d always strive to be tender, to be loving, and to be gentle with other people. i would try to surround myself with caring people that shared the same mindset as well. when relationships form between people who aim to do good in this world, we can create solidarity. spence bryan reaume moreau 01 march 2022 integration 3 the moreau class is structured to provoke insightful moral questions that have ultimately made me a more competent person. by diving deep into my thoughts and feelings, i have learned more about myself and who i wish to be in the future. it is easy for me to read prompts and think of how they apply "in the now," but requires more effort to foresee how these questions, such as "how do i define a "life well-lived?" beyond my time at notre dame. our first week's focus question, which struck me as one of the more important ones, was "what life am i living?". ultimately, there was no way for me to honestly answer this question. i am still learning and developing the life i want to live. changing day-to-day, there is no telling what i may encounter and how it will change or affect me as a person. we all strive towards the "perfect life" i find myself unique at this point because of my goals and dreams and the processes i use to achieve them. i, unlike others, seek struggle in life; hardships push me to grow and maximize my potential in all aspects of my life. the text "why we need to slow our lives down" by pico tyler made me realize that our lives are shaped by how we grow up. tyler talks about, in sabbath ideas, that we all come home at the end of our lives. i, like many others, have been instilled with morals from my childhood. i am grateful for what i have, striving to reach my goals and caring for those i love. in a weird sense, these ideas have the feeling of "home." from thinking back on how my parents raised me to the circumstances, adversities, and struggles i faced as a child. i will forever be striving and searching for my "home." and when i have found that sense, it will be instilled into my future family's morals. week 2's readings and movies about fr. hesburgh and notre dame may be one of my all-time favorite moreau modules. in learning fascinating history about notre dame university and father and president hesburgh, i developed a sense of pride and history for every step i take on this campus. before watching this film, i would've never have known that my dorm, keough hall, is related to the former ceo of coca-cola. how cool! father hesburgh truly gave everything he had in his time as president to make this university the greatest of them all. through high school, i always heard of the history surrounding the campus and how it integrated into the culture of notre dame. at first, i only thought of history because the school is so old. but after learning more about fr. hesburgh and the development of notre dame, it is clear to see how history has impacted the culture of notre dame. fr. hesburgh's scale impacted the school during his time as president is quite impressive. it is clear to see that he, along with others, paved the way for students to become as impactful in our world as he was at the university. the domer dozen pages were filled with extraordinary people, ranging from specialties and degrees. but i found it interesting that every one of them is selflessly working to impact our world in the utmost positive way. dr. rene bernea caught my attention with his work. especially with what is going on in today's world involving outbreaks and pandemics, i thought it was fitting to listen to what dr. bernea has done to contribute to the world of medicine. dr. bernea's introduction mentions "having something to fight for." personally, i think everyone worldwide striving to succeed is doing it in memory of someone, honor someone, or prove it to themselves. for me, i not only pursue a career in professional baseball for my own enjoyment but by respecting my parents in all that they have sacrificed to help me pursue my dreams. ultimately, although not being able to relate directly to a passion for medical research and science, i found his words inspiring. my main takeaway was to know why you're doing what you're doing. i think it is easy to get caught in the blur of a busy schedule and lose focus on your ultimate goals in life. we all need to have a clear sense of "why" in our busy lives. there are many ways that these activities have developed my young mind to come full circle. and among all of the readings, i have seen who i am becoming, even if it is something i do not like. this is among the most important lesson i have learned in this class. having self-awareness is key to assessing who i am becoming. i feel that the readings and lessons in this class only cover a small portion of what is to be learned about yourself. i have felt a greater sense of self-awareness in who i am becoming through listening and partaking in conversations with my classmates and teachers. one example that is still fresh in my mind is prof. reaume describing how he was being a "jerk." during a middle school trip that he was chaperoning, there was an unfitted family that disrupted the lessons during the trip. prof. reaume stated that initially, he was furious at the family's grandmother and contemplated calling her out for letting her grandkids disrupt the conversation. he also talked about how he made assumptions about how the grandma used sky zone as an excuse to not watch over the kids. it was impressive to see him reflect back on his thoughts, humbly saying that he was thinking like a "jerk." this is an important lesson that i can learn in life. often, the heat of the moment can pressure us into making unfair assumptions. even though these urges may be natural, it is essential that i can reflect on my initial thoughts and feelings. and to ask me, is this the person i am or becoming? empathy through self-awareness empathy through self-awareness my two fundamental beliefs about our existence are that human beings are social creatures and that the only thing that is preventing us from achieving the ideal society is a deficiency in empathy. i believe that a life well-lived requires understanding yourself, trusting yourself, and loving yourself so that you have a solid foundation to understand, trust, and love others. in my oral midterm yesterday, i argued that minimalism is important to creating sustained joy and to allowing liberation and agency in our lives. pico iyer wrote in his article “why we need to slow down our lives” that “these days, in the age of movement and connection, space, as marx had it in another context, has been annihilated by time; we feel as though we can make contact with almost anywhere at any moment” (why we need to slow down our lives | by pico iyer–moreau fye week 1). i believe that while empathy does not directly result from minimalism and self-restraint, i believe that thoughtfulness does, and thoughtfulness can lead to greater self-awareness and empathy. the more distractions and consumption we have in life, the less mindful of our true selves and of others we become. living a life well-lived requires freeing up your mind. the danger, however, in being mindful is the tendency to look for easy solutions and answers to your troubles. throughout my life, and still, at notre dame, i find myself asking “why” questions instead of “what” questions, and upon reflection, i realize that the answers to my “why” questions often continue to ring in my head as limitations on what i can do. as tasha eurich wrote in her article “introspection might also lull us into a false sense of certainty that we’ve identified the real issue”(the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) |, by https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ tasha eurich–moreau fye week 6). mindfulness is one of the common practices of truly content and successful people, but doing it wrong can lead you to be worse off than you were before. to live a life well-lived, ask “what” questions, be patient, believe yourself capable of change. i think that one of the best ways to be mindful of yourself is to bring in other perspectives that you trust. for example, conversations with my parents, especially my mom, have been foundational in releasing emotions and thoughts that eat away at me and reframing my perspective to believe myself capable of better things. for example, while it is nothing new, she mentioned that one of the things i have to work on is being too judgmental and critical of those around me(conversation with mom, february 2, 2022, moreau fye week 5). i am this way because i am also very critical of myself, especially in the past. this is something we first started talking about one year ago, during my senior year of high school, and i probably would not have realized it had she not mentioned it. one fallacy of mindfulness is that it can convince us that the path to happiness only requires the self, but i do not believe that a life well-lived can happen without interacting with the people around you. in line with not limiting yourself unnecessarily, father hime’s three questions are a great way to frame your life without letting your career narrow its scope first. in my experience here at notre dame, i feel that many kids let their majors frame their life journey, from their clubs and friends to where they live and what they do twenty years from now. i have had a very back and forth discernment journey for my major, but for now, i am decided as a pls major. i think that benefit of that major is that it continues to expand your mind in undergraduate so that by the time you graduate, you are more well-read, well-spoken, and well-written than most of your peers. as himes said, “vocations lead to vocations!(three key questions by father michael himes–moreau fye week 3).” i believe that pls is a vocation that could lead to dozens of other vocations in my future, and it provides me with a certain moral foundation that allows me to ask the same questions as father himes when searching for what vocation is best able to do good in this world. using father himes's questions, in combination with the information from the surveys filled out with the center for career development, i can identify my future path easier. after looking at the classes that have most interested me in my time here, i realized that my future vocation would have to engage my curiosity daily. “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!”(navigating your career journey, meruelo family center for career development–moreau fye week 4). my classes here have shaped what i am interested in and have led me to believe that i have to do something that works to improve society in practical ways, but also involves interpersonal relationships, to lead a life well-lived. living a life well-lived also requires recognizing your connection with everyone around you. this requires you to empathize with others as much as possible because it is our responsibility to pick others up around us. often, money takes precedence over people, which hurts everyone spiritually if not physically. pope francis said, “one cannot love unless it is at their own expense”(his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, by pope francis–moreau week 7). in both one’s personal interactions and their careers, i believe that this quote is essential to understanding what a life well-lived stands for. sacrifice is necessary for empathy, and empathy is necessary to make decisions that truly benefit the most people possible. few people better represent a life well-lived than father hesburgh. his career is characterized by an understanding of himself and empathizing with others. one quote of his https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone?language=en https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone?language=en stood out to me: “i’m willing to take a crack at this”(hesburgh, jerry barca, and christine o’malley–moreau fye week 2). he revitalized and modernized the university of notre dame through his compassion, innovation, and dedication to principle. he was an essential part of the civil rights movement and was one of the best at bringing people together. he was a friend to all and an enemy to none. his work has positively impacted thousands of people, and yet he was incredibly humble concerning his faith and his mission. i believe that father hesburgh incorporates all of the previously mentioned components of a life well-lived, and he has in many ways reframed my vision of my time here and what it means. i believe that he discovered himself through god, and that that discovery allowed him to help others as he did. therefore, i will continue to discover myself during my time here, knowing that when i leave i will be prepared to help others. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 moreau integration moreau integration #3 to the man that held the pen we gather here today to remember a father, a husband, a son, a brother, and a friend. and while he is gone, his memory does not go with him. john always questions what a “good life” was, and if you were close to him, you knew he would ask these certain type of questions. while many weren’t serious, he wanted to get down to what the good life was, and steered his life in that direction. looking back, i saw 6 major things that john focused on throughout his life. first: self-reflection. while john was raised catholic, he often felt his faith falter for periods of time. he told me that he always felt reassured when close to god, and through prayer, was able to reflect on his life. “what am i doing?” is the question he asked the most. “what am i doing?” he said it not because he was angry at doing something wrong, nor did he say it because he was proud of something he did. john loved the truth and knowing that he did the right thing. he would beat himself up over making the wrong decision, leaving it unresolved for days on end. it was through self-reflection and prayer, that he was able to calm himself. he was able to ask “what am i doing?” and reflect on his day, week, month and life. it took him far into his life until he realized that the past is the past, the future is too far away and the present is the now. so i say to you, reflect often to learn, not to beat yourself up. was inspired by (dad) who was inspired by (grandpa). he saw his dad working hard so every day that he worked just as hard for his dad to be proud of him. to john, he thought only his successes and grades mattered to his parents, so he would work himself into the ground, unknowing that grades didn’t matter to them. john looked up to his dad’s determination to be a good person, to make others laugh (often at himself), to always know what to do, and to be someone people liked. john realized that he was trying too hard to be the same exact person as his dad. take inspiration from people, but don’t be the same person. you are your own person. why, why, why. john’s questions would become exhausting at some point, but you have to admire his curiosity. he took the philosophers viewpoint of “question everything” extremely seriously. this goes back to his reflection, but he would question things about his own life, not just science and math. he would try and find the best way to live out his life. when going through high school and college, he would often ask if he was making the right choice of major and career path. he kept on asking questions and ended with two solutions. “i love science, i love helping people.” find what you love to do, not what is easy or you are told to do. exploration for john was more than just going somewhere you didn’t know. for john, it was getting lost, finding your way back and making an exploration into a grand journey. i guess that this was similar to john’s life. he never knew what he was going to do, but he always had a goal in mind. the goal often changed but he was always determined to get there. he wasn’t afraid to try new things, a long way from just pasta with butter and salt. his eagerness to learn new things about people and the world led him to find the life he wanted to live. always explore new options and try new things. john hit many obstacles through his life that i won’t share at this time, but there is a lesson to be learned from them. a life outside of one's own may think that everyone has it easy, and it is only you that faces the lows of life, but everyone has their own struggles. it is not required to get through your problems on your own as john often did. rely on others to help you; you are not alone. you are never the first person to experience a problem. the most important thing is to remember the important things in life whenever small bad things occur: friends, family and health. meaningful relationships are hard to find throughout one’s life and toxic relationships can easily form. i am happy to say that all who are here are fortunate enough to be called john’s true friends. but especially in grade school and going into high school, people would bash on john and take advantage of him and his personality. but it was the one’s that would text him how his day was or if he wanted to get something to eat that mattered. john found that meaningful relationships were one of the most important in the “good life.” life doesn’t matter if you don’t have people to enjoy it with. living life together with other people makes life worth it. and by surrounding himself with “good” people, john lived a “good life.” so as i wrap this up, i hope you notice that the “goodness” of john’s life didn’t depend on his accomplishments, his career or anything that gave him stress in his early age. he would often stress about a grade late into the night, and then forget about it a month later. or getting laid off from work, just to find a better job a week later. the happiness from john’s life came from his reflection, his role models, his questions, his many quests, his problems, and most important his relationships. he didn’t allow failure to overtake him, nor bad relationships that caused him so many problems. he focused on the good and light in his life. it allowed him to control his life and live the way he wanted to. he was truly the man that held the pen of his life. final integration fys 10102 29 april 2022 moreau capstone integration my mission is to always act with humility, kindness, and empathy towards the people around me. i think that if we all worked towards this kind of selflessness, a lot of the world’s issues and suffering would be more resolved than they are now. because of this, these values are important in my own life, as i believe that god created us in order to support those around us, even if we cannot completely relate to them or their experiences. even though people can act with malice towards me, i think it is still important to treat them with kindness and respect. this is because we never really know what someone is going through in their personal lives or inner self, and we should always treat people the way we want to be treated. because of this “golden rule,” i also think empathy and humility are extremely important. this is due to the fact that both traits are essential to our ability to relate to others, and especially those who are suffering. in my opinion, kindness, humility, and empathy are all particularly significant to the human experience, and thus, they are also all essential to the pursuit of a life well-lived (mission statement by –moreau fys week 13). one of the ways in which i will act on my mission statement in the next three years is through becoming more mindful and self-reflective. in the first week of moreau this semester, we talked about the importance of self-reflection, especially as notre dame students. with this, we were given the worksheet “pause for reflection” from the mcdonald center for student well-being (“pause for reflection” from mcdonald center–moreau fys week 1). i think this worksheet is extremely useful since it forces me to think about and write down my reflections. because of this, i plan to utilize the worksheet at the end of each semester here at notre dame. i also plan to use the mindfulness menu from the mcdonald center throughout each semester to https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cb4nuqz4smhsv20zbuxknbszip0m6zryigh0jkgl3fo/edit?usp=sharing https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cb4nuqz4smhsv20zbuxknbszip0m6zryigh0jkgl3fo/edit?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view find concrete ways to improve (“mindfulness menu” from mcdonald center–moreau fys week 6). in these ways, i hope to be able to improve in each consequent semester after i fill out each reflection. i think self-reflection in general will help me on my mission statement because i think my own well-being and better mindset will be reflected in the way i treat those around me. i also think the importance of reflection was demonstrated in the third week of moreau. this week, we talked about sister theresa aletheia noble, who thinks that we should always have our deaths in mind, saying “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham–moreau fys week three). after thinking about it, i agree with this sentiment and think it applies well to my mission statement. because of this, i will continue to remember my death throughout the next three years at notre dame. this is because i think remembering my death will encourage me to act in the way i want to be remembered after i die, which is what i described in my mission statement. with this, i will also keep my third integration in mind, since it is written as a eulogy. i wrote that eulogy in reflecting on how i want to be remembered, and i think it connects pretty well to my mission statement (integration three by maggie clark–moreau fys week 8). besides self-reflection, another important aspect of my next three years at notre dame is career discernment. in my future career, i hope to live by my mission statement in that i want to do something that helps to promote kindness and goodness in the world. i think the resources we explored from the meruelo center for career development will help me to do this. one of the resources that i thought was helpful in this regard was the “7 clues” assignment from week 4 of moreau (“7 clues” by meruelo center–moreau fys week 4). as i contemplate what i want to do in my life to pursue a life-well lived, i think i will continue to take this survey every semester https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sexhurkurernvdy8sgnwzaaktar-385q/view https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jjzyx3jvv24j8edg1jxu7ftvparqzyke1ghivhqjxda/edit?usp=sharing https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/sv_0nyulyvk9jdsurs and see how my answers change. i think this would be helpful because it will allow me to see my character growth and development, especially in terms of career, as my time at notre dame progresses. i also really enjoyed the discernment activity from week 5, and will plan to do a similar repetition with that process (“week five discernment activity” by moreau fys–moreau fys week five). i think hearing about the opinions of others is extremely important in my mission statement, especially since it is so dependent on my treatment of others. because of this, i think the discernment activity is extremely important to my development as a notre dame student. another aspect of moreau this semester that is essential not only to the course, but also my mission statement. in the course, i think we learned about a perfect example of this respect: father hesburgh. one of the aspects of father hesburgh’s presidency at notre dame, and his life, was his ability to demonstrate respect from all sides of the political spectrum and thus allowing all voices to be heard (“hesburgh” film by jerry barca and christine o’malley–moreau fys week 2). in order to treat people with the empathy and kindness mentioned in my mission statement, i plan to try my best to respect all opinions i hear on this extremely diverse campus, just as father hesburgh did throughout his life. by continuing to hear these different perspectives, i think i will be able to avoid echo chambers since “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko–moreau fys week 11). i think the avoidance of echo chambers in this way is important in my mission statement since my mission statement requires being open and being kind to those around me through showing them the same respect i would like to receive from them. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzllbsiweev%2fjfi%2bcr6yhwvitkgqem0jof10g0xiwclxub6nhb%2bva31uqq5sjeb63jpjiyq6mnzsul1eyjdgogtm0xfzs0gxsszuhumczwgnlwzhfydkkg1zr8w2%2fw1adenwjc0q0cosrjejzoinngl0qjtfitm0jdth2lkljloyz0nuyd1neky9i9lcnzv75wxysuhgrktlsjynfcbqrqvx9nv3gq0gz2upark2qonxse6opb6srdod1mv9fpo27n1mrecrgbzejlgbw8gz1ohsrywyjzclrp%2fqvyw34kca6krpuundidrwcxcokgvvhtwvfdm5m3opxzexjus3q1ue5g%2flfqkmink2hnegsamlxur7qgr5ujh%2fk32lj%2faatpbrb0ruqe3zy92fo4m0duznsfm6emiojdjwluz%2bxtlf6cwhchkp225%2b3ox9of9blj5bypg%2fsyf0h8nf0fb73zub5lcp4hrmqgrerq0uzo%2fb2czpm44vst%2ffbfwo&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=lby9zf4ordlihjbvq18eck%2forrwbilwc0wi%2bobjvdpjujsmad2y1gbqi1dmrurf%2fju%2bu5fjpofi0juaowolngs2s0bsep6oaulxwg1l%2baydhif5mr2tew1fdatkl4c2cre1o7i296fqgvbuqggrqdwyb2yg0uti0mg4yef9ahnq2rh0xyg9579mobt1hstaaqem2590p98h76wsqh%2bxq3digbaybaqyjd2az3bjxhpxyqcnk4lqgecny0gh7ccxkqxa%2fftsuesvzdp%2bmh443kskinflbpzpxoisp9d48v%2bxrta%2fely5eiunm717ll5syiqqq%2frp%2fkhjkie6pxpux6g%3d%3d https://youtu.be/gaivxqcqnls related to the idea of respect, another important part of my mission statement is the idea of forming meaningful relationships with others. when i was writing my mission statement, i was especially thinking about how i would act in comradery with people who seemingly have no similarities to me. i think the idea of accompaniment is really important in regards to this. while i want to show respect and empathy to those around me, i plan to accompany those who are less fortunate than i am, which is not to be confused with the idea of “saving them.” i think that “to accompany is to help the person take their own destiny in their hands and allow that their voice is heard” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg–moreau fys week nine). i think accompaniment is really important to my next three years at notre dame, and i plan to work on it by pursuing opportunities for community service and opportunities to understand those not only at notre dame, but also in the larger south bend community. in order to achieve this understanding, i think inclusivity is really important. this is what we learned about in the seventh week of moreau. a quote that i think is essential to understanding this inclusivity is from pope francis: “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the 'other' is not a statistic, or a number…we all need each other” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis–moreau fys week seven). recognizing the humanity of everyone is evidently important in this idea of inclusivity, and i plan to promote this inclusivity for myself and others here at notre dame through listening to people who are different from me. to do this, i want to sit by new people at the beginning of each semester. in this way, i can meet more members of the notre dame community rather than sticking to my comfort zone of my own friends. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript in my mission statement, this understanding is extremely important in my treatment of those from minority groups. in order to promote this treatment in my own life and in the community of notre dame, i plan to look at my faith and relationship with god. as shown in “the spirit of inclusion” from notre dame, “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” from du lac–moreau fys week 10). i want to promote this society described, and think that i can do so through strengthening my relationship with god and respecting all of his creation. even so, i understand that simply respecting others is not enough in this world of such social injustice. in order to advocate for social justice in the notre dame community, i plan to use some of my time in the coming years to join clubs and organizations that align with my values and promote and advocate for human dignity. even though i do not think my involvement will solve all of the world’s problems, i do, like dean g. marcus cole, think that in regards to these issues, “each of us must do what we can, wherever we are” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole–moreau fys week 12). i hope to do my part by abiding by my mission statement in the ways i have described throughout this integration. by doing so, i think i will be able to live the life-well-lived we have been contemplating since the beginning of the semester. moreau fye final integration matthew dipaolo 4/27/2022 prof. taylor moreau fye final integration matthew dipaolo is a man that is currently attending the university of notre dame. i am a catholic who believes in god, but loosely follows the rules of the church. morally, i mostly believe that you should always be a good person for others, and i think that i can frame that in terms of catholicism pretty easily. i define success as being able to be happy in whatever profession you choose while also being financially stable. i am hoping that i will be able to do this with my notre dame education while i am here, after graduation and beyond. the highest good that i am constantly reaching for is inner satisfaction with how my life is at any given moment. i hope to be in a profession where i can try and change america in terms of equality. sexism is the root of all bigotry so i’ll feel satisfied when i attack its core. i try not to judge others, but i do end up accidentally placing other people’s beliefs in association with them as a person. to respond to this, i try to reverse the roles, and see what people would think of me if they only knew my views and beliefs on life. to be wise is to be intelligent because of past experiences. i try to put myself through lots of different and new opportunities so that i can try and grow in wisdom. i believe that it is every person’s responsibility to care for others regardless of what you think. we are gonna end up in the same place, so helping people along the way should be a given compared to not. i plan to carry this out over the next few years by keeping my drive behind my force for good. i had always planned to go to law school, but i never knew what i wanted to do with that education and with my powerful notre dame education. now i feel as if i have a plan with that law degree, or somewhat of a path to go with that. my current major and minor are psychology and gender studies, which i chose for specific reasons. instead of being basic political science or history, i chose to pursue a psychology major. i can learn why people think the way they think and what contributes to that. it would be more fair if i can analyze the people i am trying to put in prison and the people i am defending because i would get a better view of their intentions. with a minor in gender studies, it allows me to be a more equitable person regardless of who they are or where they come from. it also has taught me a lot about systems of oppression, and with a law degree, i would try and actively try and take these systems down. pursuing these educational options over the next three years would help me be a better person to others, fulfilling inner satisfaction, paving the way for a life well lived. “the words of the priest from college came back to mind: “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.” at the time, i’d thought this meant god loved me in spite of my being attracted to men. but i started to see he was using my sexuality to reach me with his love.” ("growing up gay and catholic” jacob walsh, grotto moreau fye week 10). being gay and catholic also contributes to my drive to do good in the world. instead of giving up on my faith, i decided to pursue it despite challenges i may face. i have grown from hating myself because of this from being grateful i wasn’t created another way. hopefully i will be able to make change in https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 the church in the future systemically for all marginalized groups affected, not only lgbtq+ i will not be surprised if there are many obstacles along the way. first, graduating college will be a task in itself. especially at notre dame with all the academic rigor, it will be difficult to keep up, but i think i will be able to. getting through law school will be rough as well. everyone i know who has gone through law school says that it has been a real challenge, and i even know a few people who have dropped out. getting into a good one will be hard enough as it is. another large issue i can run into is the constant battle with myself. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started.” (text: “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” tasha eurich, ted conferences moreau fye week six) a lot of people run into problems with themself in terms of mental health and issues with self-doubt. considering that my hopeful profession would be one to receive a decent amount of backlash, i believe that this will be a problem especially for me moving forward. as i have written about in prior qqc’s, i have had ongoing mental health struggles for most of my life, which have still persisted since going to college. fortunately, i have a great support system behind me, which i am sure will continue well into the future. this sort of support will help push me through the rough patches in life and get rid of these obstacles in my life. “but the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us.’ we all need each other.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). this quote from pope francis is very important to me https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript because of how it demonstrates how everyone is equal and she is treated as such. an issue i take with people is if they act as if they are above people because they may have a higher education level or a higher amount of income than someone else. not matter where we come from or how we were raised, we are all equal in the end. moreau integration capstone april 11, 2022 moreau fye capstone integration the notre dame experience is defined by the ability to discover, adapt, and revise the way we see the world and the ways in which we fit into it. growth is encouraged and opportunities to do so are everywhere. specifically, the moreau first year experience provides moments away from the chaos of classes, exams, and assignments to reflect upon our personal paths. far away from the influences of family, hometown friends, and cultural expectations, i have been able to truly discern what matters to me as well as how i can integrate these values into my future. i feel as though i have found a more holistic approach to life, recognizing that there are many aspects to a fulfilling future, rather than just a successful career and a happy family. as such, throughout the next three years and beyond, i hope to better myself, better the world around me, and act with courage during the difficult moments. by becoming the best version of myself, i can be of the greatest good to others. i hope to be constantly evolving, using dissatisfaction as a mechanism for change and improvement. (three key questions, week 3) i can first do this by learning as much as i can in avenues such as my classes and medical school. i truly want to delve deeply into material and understand beyond simply memorizing for an exam. i will work with professors to learn more about topics i care about and become well-versed in my areas of study. in a broader sense, however, i hope to be a lifelong learner outside of the classroom. i will recognize each day as a renewed opportunity to gain perspective and wisdom from the people in my life and the experiences i encounter. in this manner, i can better myself through not only academic knowledge, but also practical and emotional awareness. i can secondly improve myself by becoming more self aware of my talents and gifts by participating in a variety of activities, projects, and research. i will continue creative writing through the creative writing club and truly hone my creative process and artistic side. i plan to work with professors in the neuroscience and spanish departments to combine my passion for the two subjects in a way that benefits partners in the south bend community. lastly, i want to become literate in a laboratory and experiment with a substantial range of topics. by expanding my experiences, i can find out what i am good at and how i can best use my skills. third, i will better myself by embracing imperfection, embodying vulnerability, and becoming emotionally intelligent. to be human is to be wonderfully and beautifully flawed, and as time goes on, i hope to become more comfortable with this and let go of perfectionism. nobody can be truly perfect, and to work towards that is only a detriment. i will remain hopeful about myself and about the world, fostering the “virtue of a heart that doesn’t lock itself into darkness, that doesn’t dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but is able to see a tomorrow.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone, week 7) as such, i will do the work to be comfortable showing all sides of myself to those closest to me, including when i am not doing my best. in tandem, i hope to spread empathy and be a safe place for friends and family to come to in times of trouble and in times of joy. i will accept my own flaws and love others despite theirs. there is beauty in variety, and change truly is the spice of life, so i can better myself by embracing this instead of running away from it. as a bridge between bettering myself and the world around me, i will both spread and accept love. i will cultivate relationships with people i care about and maintain strong ties with my siblings and extended family. i will continue sunday night dinners, thanksgiving kickball games, christmas morning cinnamon rolls, and other important family traditions. in these ways, i hope to become the best version of myself so that i can find peace in my own life and harmony between mind and body (ways to practice mindfulness, week 6) so that i may best serve others. the other facet of my mission is to better the world around me. i pursue my ultimate purpose of serving others and embodying selflessness. i believe that i am called to be generous with the great opportunities that i have been given, and i think this can manifest in a multitude of ways on several levels. i will manifest generosity through small acts in my daily life like giving up my seat on the bus, or allowing someone else to go in front of me in line. i aim to remember that there is usually reasoning behind others’ actions, and that i never truly know what is going on in someone’s life. as such, i will be gracious and understanding in all interactions. the driver cutting me off on the freeway might be rushing to get a friend to the hospital; the rude customer might have just gotten fired. in small ways like this, i can live my mission in my daily life. on a larger scale, i will work towards becoming a doctor and serving others through my career. if possible, after gaining experience and resources, i can work with organizations like the red cross or other ngos to bring healthcare to areas that may not have access and accompany those who have less. (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together, week 9) second, i will respect everyone, especially those different from myself. i will continue the work to become more culturally competent, “be engaged in the world”, and listen to marginalized groups (hesburgh, week 2). i recognize that all people deserve humanity and grace, and i hope to make a difference in implementing this in the real world. lastly, i will be a good friend and sister and give back to those that have given so much to me. in these ways, i can leave the world better than i found it. along with these two facets, i hope to act with courage in the difficult moments. life is full of ups and downs, and i aim to remember that “we can never be irreparably broken.” (looking for alaska) humans are resilient creatures; we can endure a great deal and come out the other side stronger and more prepared for the struggles the world may throw at us. i will write my own narrative with free will and be brave in hard times. notre dame will provide me with the foundation to live out this mission, and i will spend the next three years pursuing paths that lead me to this fulfilled life. mr. comuniello moreau fye 4 march 2022 in loving memory of usually when people give eulogies, they recount the stories about the person that made them laugh. moments full of pure joy, emotion, happiness. but the problem with abygail is that her whole life was one happy story. she was an indiana native…go hoosiers, but not the iu hoosiers. she was the oldest of seven kids to parents barb and bryan, and from an early age, began to learn everything she ever needed to know about life. how be a role model, how to be a leader, how to care, how to be kind. and not all these lessons came from her family, we did some of that too! and that’s the way she chose to live her life. she was always active, trying every sport out there until she found one that she liked. in middle school it was swimming and soccer. high school: rowing. but, in the classroom, she was smart as a whip, and her intellect and her love of learning carried her so far in life. she always wanted to know more until there was nothing left for her to know. she attended the university of notre dame where she graduated with a bachelor’s in biological sciences and a minor in bioengineering. while at notre dame, she was on the women’s water polo team and a member of student government. when she was not at one of those two places, she was a resident of cavanaugh hall probably playing all the interhall sports she didn’t ever have time to play. being part of such a loving community meant the world to her. she was always looking for a place to make a difference in this world, no matter how small, and she did that both at notre dame and out in south bend, she continued to medical school and earned her md, practicing medicine in the hospital system. her family was always so supportive of her dreams and whatever she wanted to do with her life, and this had always made sense for her. this career fit abygail perfectly and embodied her passions in life. despite her long list of schooling credentials, she got married and had four kids. when not at work, she loved spending time with every one of them: going on hikes, baking, travelling. anything thar made her smile and laugh because they were infectious. she always loved sharing her passions with those she cared about the most and wanted to live her life with them and for them. to share her love of life with those around her. in her spare time, which let’s be honest, was not very much for this hard-working, determined doctor and mother, she loved to give back to her community through service and through her church. as the years passed, she was a work horse, and when it came for retirement, she didn’t really want to go. she was not the kind of person to give up what she loved, but she loved her husband more than anything in this world, and when he begged, she willingly went. she retired in the mountains to look at the beauty of the world from a place far away. to enjoy the peace and serenity that she had earned after everything she did with her life. she is survived by her four children and her brothers and sisters. abygail was a remarkable woman who has left behind an intangible legacy. let us continue to let live and let love to celebrate her life. a lot of what i wrote in my eulogy centered around sharing my life with other people, not just the ones i am related to. pico iyer, in his ted article gave this one quote: “in the end, all journeys have to bring us home” (pico iyer, “why we need to slow down our lives, moreau fye week 1). home for me has always been my family and my friends. being able to do what i love with who i love. being satisfied with what i have done. all these things fit into what i believe is a life well lived. throughout my life, people have been with me through everything, and i have always felt called to share that with others and be that someone for other people. my first year at notre dame has been a time where i am starting to figure out what that looks like for me. for fr. hesburgh, it meant standing up for what you believe in, regardless of what others say. throughout the documentary “hesburgh,” he used his faith as a foundation for all of his actions, all of his beliefs beyond the church, and with strength like that, he was able to accomplish whatever he set his mind to (“hesburgh”, moreau fye week 2). i do have a firm foundation in my faith and my beliefs, but i am not quite at that point in my life, but i do hope that by the time someone is really reading my eulogy at my actual funeral, that they will be able to say that i have done that and done it successfully. i also want people to recognize the qualities in my life i see as strengths of my life and not dwell on my shortcomings as eurich recommends in her article (tasha eurich, “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”, ted, moreau fye week 6). i want people to see in my life after i have died, there is also the question of what i have done with my life, and so i spent a portion of my eulogy reflecting on that. sister aletheia in the new york times article talks about her idea of memento mori and looking at life through the lens of death. though i had never really thought of it that way before, she gives this one nice quote: “memento mori is: where am i headed, where do i want to end up?” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die”, nyt, moreau fye week 3). i reflected on my career path and career decisions and how it was mostly based on my passions, because i feel that is the best way to live a life that you are satisfied with, a life where you have ended up where you wanted to be. the career activities from the merulo family center for career development only helped me solidify the idea that i want to go to medical school and that being a doctor is the right plan for me (“navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). in my eulogy, i also talk a lot about the role of my friends in my life. having friends that will sit down and have an honest conversation about what you want to do with your life (“discernment conversation,” moreau fye week 5) are the kind of friends that want to stick around. they’re the kind of people that i would want to be writing my eulogy in the future (the very far of future that is). and lastly, speaking of people, they are the crux of my life. it is through them i am going to make a difference as i claim in my eulogy, as fr. greg boyle did in tattoos of the heart. beyond his friends, beyond his comfort zone, he made it his mission to build relationships with at risk youth and made a real difference. he saved them from a life of crime. he gave them purpose. he made a difference. it is those kinds of interactions with not only my friends and family, but the people i meet that make a difference in the world (fr. greg boyle, tattoos on the heart-ch.8, moreau fye week 7). and that is all i want out of my life. i want to love, be loved. be happy, be satisfied, and make a difference. that is what i believe it means to live a life well lived, and that is what i have conveyed in my eulogy. moreau final integration moreau fys andrew whittington mission statement at the beginning of the fall semester of my freshman year at the university of notre dame, my beliefs were dissonant. i lacked the steadfast values that i observed in others around me. over the course of the year, my beliefs have solidified and i have grown as a person. i have recognized the importance of maintaining self-awareness, the significance of appreciating others, and ultimately learning how to take the next step towards action. through constant self-reflection for the past several months, i have begun to learn more about myself than before. i realize my goals and my aspirations. i realize what i prioritize in life and what i should start to prioritize. whether it’s time spent with family or new relationships at college, i will continue to put in more effort than before with no expectation of reward. maintaining healthy relationships consists of a mutual understanding of each other in which neither thinks better of themselves, nor worse of their partner. i have also learned about the inequality that persists in and out of our campus that which i have not encountered before. from conversing with so many people from vastly different backgrounds, i have gained a great deal of knowledge of the world outside of glen ellyn, il. coming from somewhere in which people shared common backgrounds, the idea of racism and prejudice has always seemed drastically over characterized by others. with such a diverse student body, notre dame has taught me to appreciate others more and to empathize with their unique experiences. awareness of myself and awareness of others is a pillar of my self-understanding both now and in the future. taking the next step after discovering conviction. this is what it means to have courage. the idea of courage reminds me of the importance of acting on your beliefs and its separation from pure emotion. it’s important for me to remember that it’s not always easy to act upon my conviction, despite knowing what good effects it will have. courage is something that i have to mailto:ewhittin@nd.edu grow myself because it’s my duty to. i often find it hard to do what i know i should do due to the discomfort that it will bring me. i know that choices can be hard, but what i will continue to embody is acting on what i know is good rather than avoiding what will make me uncomfortable. i now realize that courage is a virtue that is dormant within each of us, but it’s our responsibility to find and ignite it. (me) finding a balance i plan to live with my mission statement close in mind, to embody the virtues that i recognized for myself. over the next three years at notre dame, i will take advantage of the community and opportunities that the school has to offer. i know that those around me will only help me in this mission to become a better person for myself and for others. developing a stronger sense of self-awareness, appreciating others, and learning how to take action are several core values that i have chosen to follow for the rest of my life in some way or another. throughout the thirteen weeks of moreau, i have gained something new each time that i will incorporate into aspects of my life. through constant self-reflection for the past several months, i have begun to learn more about myself than before. i realize my goals and my aspirations. i realize what i prioritize in life and what i should start to prioritize. in the first week of moreau, i learned the significance of taking some time in life to distinguish between things of importance. the article that we read for that week, why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer, discussed how crucial it is to designate time away from technology and away from the world (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau week one). from the beginning of the semester, i was already considering the importance of things in my life and how to allocate more time to things that needed it. transitioning to college, it’s difficult for me to find time to do everything that i want to do such as keeping up with lecture material and being able to participate in extracurriculars. finding this balance through prioritization has ameliorated my struggles more than i can think. alongside prioritization, i’ve learned of the importance of staying grounded in reality and not allowing myself to worry about things that don’t pertain to the present. the quote from saint benedict, “keep death daily before your eyes”, resonated within me because it made me realize the importance of staying present in life (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by new york times moreau week three). by reminding myself of the inevitability of death, i will reach a greater appreciation for the moments that i experience. the topic of https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html self-reflection has pervaded the material for this class and continued past previous examples of prioritizing different activities. continuing through moreau, i gained a deeper understanding of what it means to truly self-reflect. i began to contemplate the choices i’ve made and have yet to make, learning more about my goals and aspirations along the way. the act of self-reflection was emphasized in the article the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau week six). i have learned the differences in right and wrong self-reflection and utilize new techniques so that i am not keeping myself in a state in which there is no change. also in class, i learned the significance of my awareness of becoming trapped within an echo chamber of my own opinions. dr. paul blaschko discussed the meaning of an echo chamber and how to avoid entanglement (“how to avoid an echo chamber'' by dr. paul blaschko moreau week eleven). i am able to relate to most of what dr. blaschko talks about because of the experience i have with people who are stuck in an echo chamber. another resource that helped me discern my path for the future was the irish compass from the meruelo family center for career development, which presented to me possible paths based on the responses that i gave (“irish compass” moreau week four). i plan on using this resource again in the future to help me figure out what to do when i get lost. these several weeks of my moreau experience gave me a tremendous amount of insight into what it means to grow personally, and how to go about doing so. i will continue to learn and grow from mistakes i make and will continue with these lessons in mind. taking the next step after discovering conviction. this is what it means to have courage. the idea of courage reminds me of the importance of acting on your beliefs and its separation from pure emotion. several lessons from moreau focused on my external growth rather than internal, especially the idea of going out and taking action while building relationships with people who may seem entirely different. the most important thing i gained about this came from the film about father hesburgh himself (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ moreau week two). in witnessing his countless acts to better humanity, i learned the importance of taking action towards something that i am passionate about when given the opportunity. in conjunction with taking action, the idea of external relationships was stressed throughout moreau. the constitutions of the holy cross write explicitly about making a home among more than one people or culture, and how we must go beyond our own borders (“constitutions of the holy cross” moreau week twelve). building my relationships with others is one of the core values that i hold in my mission statement and one that i reflect on each day. something that i hadn’t considered before was the unification with others to eliminate the concept of “i” and replace it with “we”. in a video with pope francis, he discussed what unification means for the future and how we must not exclude anybody in our advancement as a society (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau week seven). in order to reach this level of unification, there are numerous obstacles that remain in our way as a society that we have to overcome. issues such as racism, sexism, and political extremism are very pertinent issues that can be alleviated if each one of us does our part. as we are expanding to develop our relationships with people from other countries and cultures, it’s important to realize the relationships we still have to address at home in our own country. in the article why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism by dr. robin d’angelo, the author broaches difficult topics about racism that appear to be embedded in our society (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin d’angelo week ten). by far the most important lesson that i’ve learned about this is the awareness that is required to foster new relationships. building a new relationship means that there has to be a mutual understanding of each other from both sides. the involuntary compensation that arises when meeting inhabitants of a foreign culture has to be eliminated in order to promote a healthy environment. in the article teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by professor steve reifenberg, i learned the difference between being the voice for others, and helping others gain a voice (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing steve reifenberg moreau week nine). going forward, i will incorporate this lesson into how i interact with people who i would otherwise treat differently. these particular lessons from moreau helped me to gain an understanding of what it means to be courageous, as well as the right way to build new relationships with people i don’t know. the next several years are for building relationships with others and even with myself. while there are many lessons to be learned from moreau, i will strive to follow as closely to my personal mission statement as possible knowing that i can become a better person for those around me. integration 3 selm 1 josephine selm alison thigpen fys 10102 20 february 2022 reflections of my own life josephine selm was a caring and inquisitive person. known as josie or jo to her friends and family, she came from humble beginnings. from cornfields and cow pastures and riding on tractors with her dad and grandpa. growing up, she was a very curious child, who was always learning and growing with each new experience, and her surroundings enabled her to do just that. she would regularly visit her parents at work, which is where she first experienced the lifestyle of working in a hospital setting, which ultimately shaped her dreams and career path. josie lived a life of ambition, driven by her desire to help others in what she was doing while also enjoying what she was involved in, but it was often difficult to see the impacts of these actions due to the fast paced nature of life. now that she has passed, “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what [her life] really [meant], and to take in the larger picture.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) even as a young child, josie was rather shy in public, but was loyal and loving toward those who she could call her friends. she always wanted to make sure everyone was having a good time, even if it meant sacrificing some of her own comfort in the process. she wanted the comfort of others before she thought of her own. as pope francis stated in a 2017 message via ted talk, “none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i”, separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone.” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone.” by his holiness pope francis moreau fys week https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript selm 2 7). josie understood this mantra and actively employed this through her interactions with others. she was an active member of her community, helping to tutor others and partaking in activities that benefited those in need, whether it be working at food pantries or raking a neighbor’s yard. she strove to help those in need with her actions. it’s important to note that josie’s life was not entirely absent of hardships and failings. in reality, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” (hesburgh by moreau fys week 2)those close to josie knew of her habits, and she was often said to struggle with stress and perfectionism, especially in relation to her schoolwork and major events in her life (moreau fys week 5). her shyness was sometimes limiting, and she faced a lot of anxiety in regards to how others viewed her. despite these aspects of her life, josie still managed to persevere, making friends along the way and actively working on her schoolwork while making plans for her future. despite hardships faced within her lifetime, josie was always able to persevere, to see the joy and the hope hidden beneath the murky surroundings. as stated by sister aletheia, “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” by ruth graham moreau fys week 3). from familial accidents to personal setbacks, josie was able to learn through these many experiences, and was able to grow as a person and come to better understand herself as a result of these hardships and experiences. she could then take these lessons and learnings and apply them to her community to help those who were struggling from similar situations. josie was an inquisitive person. growing up she would constantly ask questions about how the world worked and why certain things happen. she employed this notion of asking why questions to better understand her surroundings. as she continued to learn and grow, these https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html selm 3 questions shifted from her environment to herself, and she fell victim like many others to the transfer of why questions towards herself; however, “why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich phd moreau fys week 6). it took some time and a lot of help from friends and family, but over time, josie was able to shift her application of these questions, enabling herself to grow as a person while she continued her search for knowledge and answers in the world around her at the same time. josie had many interests and career paths she was considering, but they all revolved around the same central components: she needed to like what she was pursuing and she wanted to actively help others at the same time. she followed the same school of thought that career was cumulative, that “the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible.” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services university of notre dame moreau fys week 4). josie wanted to pursue a career in medicine, and had been exploring different fields via shadowing experiences and online research. she was extremely interested in the worlds of surgery and pathology, and had plans to explore these areas as well. overall, she wanted to help others by providing a service to aid those who were suffering and in need. she was involved in a number of different clubs on campus that related to these interests in medicine, which enabled her to gain experience and to learn more about medicine and career paths in this area. josie was a bright and loving individual who strove to help those she could during her lifetime. she knew how to use the skills she had to help others around her, whether it was her https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ selm 4 close friends, her family, or complete strangers, and she received immense joy in being able to do just that. she knew her strengths and weaknesses and was able to play them to her advantage, enabling her to discover her interests and helping her in her discernment of her career path. josie loved spending time with others and doing what she could to help cheer up their days. although she faced hardship in her life, she used these to learn more about herself and the world around her, to be a better person as a result of them. selm 5 works cited francis, his holiness pope. “why the only future worth building includes everyone.” his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, apr. 2017, https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_build ing_includes_everyone/transcript. graham, ruth. “meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die.” the new york times, the new york times, 14 may 2021, https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html. hesburgh. directed by patrick creadon, staring fr. theodore hesburgh, 2018. iyer, pico. “why we need to slow down our lives.” ideas.ted.com, 4 nov. 2014, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/. marketing communications: web | university of notre dame. “navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course.” undergraduate career services, https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/. phd, tasha eurich. “the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way).” ideas.ted.com, 2 june 2017, https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ integration 3 combs 1 professor harrington moreau first-year experience 20 february 2022 the little things shaping my life well-lived the assignments and readings of the first half of this course have been centered around the concept of a life well-lived. as such, i decided to focus on how i came to define a life well-lived, how it can be observed, and how i came to this understanding. the idea of a life well-lived was a concept i hadn’t spent much time contemplating. i have always had ambitions or goals that i strived to achieve but i hadn’t considered why i wanted to achieve them or what those ambitions meant. the first semester of moreau has made me think about my own life in a new light. at the beginning of the semester, i had no distinction between a life well-lived and a successful life. in part, this was because i hadn’t spent time considering what a well-lived life is. in my mind, the goal of a successful life would bring a well-lived life. while my mind did change throughout the semester i think it is best characterized from this quote in week 4; “if a person only focuses on one or two parts of his/her self-concept for a career, that person will eventually hit a wall” (“navigating your career journey” by moreau family center for career development moreau fye week four). by the time i read this quote, i had already been developing an understanding of a life well-lived. however, i wanted to highlight this quote near the start of my integration because it emphasizes a key misunderstanding i faced in my concept of success. in my mind, working towards a goal and maximizing that skill was the path to success. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ combs 2 however, this reading brought me the understanding that a successful career is shaped similarly to a math equation with many variables. if you only let yourself focus on one variable you would see diminishing results as the other areas are neglected. this reading began to shift my understanding of a successful career and led to a splintering of the concepts of success and a life well-lived. how this became prevalent in my life was a better emphasis on balance as i started spending more time with my friends and playing interhall hockey. a successful life is one filled with balance where no variables are neglected. this wasn’t to say i believed a life well-lived could not be a successful life. i think these goals can be accomplished together but they do not necessarily lead to each other. this belief was established in week two after we watched the hesburgh movie. one quote that stuck out to me was “it wasn’t how i expected to serve, but i was serving my country in my own way” (“hesburgh film” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh lived an incredibly successful life and made lasting impacts on the lives of those around him but he still lived a life-well lived. this movie was moving because i didn’t have much background knowledge about father hesburgh. i didn’t know the role he played in the civil rights movement or the influence he had in the cold war nuclear negotiations. after the movie, i felt as if i developed a new concept of what success meant to me. a successful life could be a life dedicated to helping others because the impact of your life will outlast your own. the first assignment of the semester covered the idea of slowing down our lives. as i read this article i remember thinking “why would i want to slow down my life?” i was thinking of life in terms of accomplishing the goals we set for ourselves. however, i became more intrigued by the article as it connected this concept to the technological developments our world is facing. the https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 combs 3 article discussed the unregulated advancement of technology as it stated “the people who seem wisest about the necessity of placing limits on the newest technologies are, often, precisely the ones who helped develop those technologies, which have bulldozed over so many of the limits of old.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this struck a chord with me as i had recently been reading a book that specifically discussed the consequences of unregulated advancements of technology on young minds. this quote led to the discussion of an internet sabbath being prevalent in the same companies developing this technology. i was surprised these companies were aware of the negative implications of their technologies. in the following week, i began to realize just how often i was using my phone or watching tv. i don’t think these are inherently bad things but i was prone to phone use while spending time with my friends. this is what brought the idea of a life well-lived into focus for the first time. in a modern world, surrounded by constant distractions designed to draw our attention, how can we live our own lives? i believe a life well-lived is a life where we enjoy the time we have together. a life where we choose to build relationships with those around us. my new year's resolution was to use my phone less. as such, i deleted tik tok and instagram while making a real effort to enjoy the time i have with my friends and family. i’m proud to say i haven’t re-downloaded these apps and have felt a truly positive impact in my life. this idea of a life well-lived became a prominent thought in my mind for the next couple of weeks as i actively tried to live in the present. it was during this time we read an article by ruth graham who wrote about sister theresa aletheia’s quote “remember your death.” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die ” by ruth graham moreau fye week https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html combs 4 three). at this point, i had been thinking of a life well-lived as a life in which we live our present lives to the fullest extent with those around us. at first, i thought this quote was calling on us to focus on our futures. however, as i thought about it more i realized this quote is calling us to live our lives to the fullest by remembering it will end. many people live their lives carrying baggage from the past or fears of the future which hinder their life in the present. ultimately, we all only have so much time together on this earth. every day we waste fearing death or running from the past is a day we lose. this article sculpted how i view a life well-lived because i came to understand that acceptance of our realities is the only way we can even pursue a life well-lived. i realized that in remembering the reality of our death we enable ourselves to take steps and make the most of the time we have now. the week six and seven assignments felt interconnected. the week six assignment covered dr. jihoon kim and how he lives his life with limited movement. he said, “the doctor told me i would not be able to walk for the rest of my life, and that was like a death sentence to me. i wanted to end my life” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). my initial reaction to this quote was a greater appreciation for what i have. this man is living in such a limited capacity and still makes the most of it. he still pursues a life well-lived. i realized just how much i had taken for granted. however, i felt a deeper meaning following the quote “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the ‘culture of waste’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). the culture of waste pope francis references is the idea that some human life is less valuable than others. this connected back to the week one discussion of technology companies because they use human data as a commodity. however, this quote gave me an even greater https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript combs 5 appreciation of the week six discussion. pope francis is arguing that the best way to overcome this disregard for human life and culture of greed is education in solidarity. dr. jihoon kim is one of the people who would have been thrown out in a pure culture of waste, yet he is accomplishing great things. dr. jihoon kim provided me with a greater appreciation for the most basic parts of my own life but he also gave me insight into the culture pope francis discussed. the week five assignment gave me a lot of perspective on myself. my dad described me as “having the fullest heart.” that is a description i want to hold in how i view myself and how others view me. it’s how i want to be remembered. i took this mindset as i thought about the week six and seven assignments. every person has an inherent value. to me, this means we all have an equal opportunity to pursue a life well-lived. however, i also think that means we all have a responsibility to help each other live a life well-lived. i developed a greater appreciation of what i have as well as a feeling of responsibility to pursue true solidarity. coming into this semester, i hadn’t thought about what my definition of a life well-lived was. throughout the first half of the semester, i have developed an idea of what a life well-lived means to me. a life well-lived is a life in the moment, accepting of the future, and is spent loving/helping others with our entire hearts. i hope to pursue this life every day by keeping social media deleted, helping others when given the opportunity, and living a life of kindness. microsoft word castillo_s2_integration2.docx castillo 1 vanessa chan moreau april 29, 2022 finding god in the ordinary events of each day the mission statement of can be summed up in this sentence: to be a saint in the middle of the world. this begins with boldly living out her catholic faith. the mission is to be unapologetically catholic. this means being unafraid of letting other people know that she is catholic and freely practice her catholic faith. the goal is also to create a culture of life and live a life guided by the truth. this aligns with another part of her mission, which is to create a family environment with the many people she interacts with. kateri is also dedicated to being faithful in the little things of everyday life. this aligns with her belief that one can be a saint in the middle of the world if they keep their life revolved around god. this will also allow her to grow in the virtues, such as the virtues of temperance, patience, and prudence, and therefore allow her to live a life of virtue. kateri is also dedicated to serving others, whether it be those close to her like her friends or family or just those that she can benefit in any way she can. finally, her mission is to live life joyfully, in the service of others, and to give thanks to all that god has given her (moreau fye week thirteen). what i have written above is my mission statement, one that i plan on living out throughout my life and one that i anticipate might change slightly as i go through life. but for the moment, here is how i see myself living out my mission statement now. i have been living life joyfully and continue to do so using a “joy [that] comes from within” me (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes – moreau fye week three). this joy can be seen in the little things in life that just bring a smile to my face. for example, on a clear night one can catch me castillo 2 just gazing at the stars and their beauty. or sometimes you will see me run into the chapel with a smile on my face as i share something with our lord (moreau fye week eight). i believe that living a life filled with joy can also help me share my life mission with others. being optimistic can help me teach people that they too can be a saint in the middle of the world as “to be a good teacher…you need to be an optimist” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). in order to keep my life revolved around god, one will see me going to mass every day. this is a way people can see me boldly living out my catholic faith. there have been times where i am not able to get lunch with my friends because it is during mass. they respect my decision and also know that they are free to join me for mass. another way i keep my life revolved around god is by intentionally setting aside fifteen minutes just for god. i have noticed that “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer – moreau fye week one). thus, one can find me spending time alone with god and ultimately recharging so that i can do my work even better for him. and in this way, i can better serve him. serving others is another aspect of my mission statement that will help me to be a saint in the middle of the world and live my best life. when serving others, one cannot be “putting [themselves] in a victim mentality” otherwise one is only thinking about themselves and not of the other person (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week six). thus, i strive to have a self-giving mindset and be of service to others in the big and the small. my desire to serve others can be seen in the way i try to make everyone’s day a little better. perhaps it is by leaving a note to my roommate to inspire her to have a great day or by texting a friend something funny to bring some sunshine into her life or just by texting someone a ‘how are you’ to let them know that they are not forgotten. these are castillo 3 just some examples of how i strive to serve others every day. a friend of mine mentioned how she has seen this spirit of service within me as she recalled how i would send friends, including herself, notes and homework when they were absent without them asking (moreau fye week five). to be a saint in the middle of the world also means to let others know that they too can become saints in their everyday lives. i strive to let people know this fact through the example i set with my life. i hope that their “experience [with me] shapes [them] in some way, whether [they] realize it at the time or not” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center for career development – moreau fye week four). one example of how i have inspired people to become closer to god is with my roommate. one time we were talking, and i told her how i spend some time with god every day and how i usually read part of the new testament during that time. ever since then, i have run into her in the chapel with a bible in hand spending some time with god. thus, my mission is also to live a life of one whose example is worth following because it brings one closer to god. in this way, i believe that i inspire people and help them to live a life in which they “will be just fine” ("domer dozen" by dr. austin hickman – moreau fye week two). another aspect of my mission statement is to create a culture of life in society. this stems from “the social teachings of the catholic church…in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10). i believe that every single person is a person from the moment of conception until natural death. thus, i stand up for life by supporting the notre dame right to life club and by going to the march for life, whether it be in dc or here at notre dame. my mission is also to create a family environment with those i interact with. this is castillo 4 because the family is the building block of society and so by creating a familial environment with those around me, hopefully i can make society stronger. one way i strive to create a familial environment with those around me is by facilitating conversation between everyone during dinner. family dinners help everyone learn how to communicate and when we communicate, we can build a stronger community. otherwise, society ends up fearing “each other because they don’t know each other, and they don’t know each other because they don’t communicate with each other” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breath and i can do something” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). i especially try to facilitate conversation between people when i eat dinner with the girls in my dorm as they spend a lot of time on their phone during the meal instead of interacting with each other. and usually, it is just by asking them how their day was. another reason why i strive to create a familial environment with those around me is because when we are jointed together, we end up having “a potful of plenty” (“tattoos on the heart: chapter 8 jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week seven). we each bring something different to society and so when we work together like a family, we can create a stronger society and change the world for the better. i also strive to live a life guided by the truth. god is the way, the truth, and the life. thus, my desire to live a life guided by the truth is related to my desire to keep god the center of my life. to live a life guided by the truth means that i actively seek the truth. i try to “be intentional about the information [i] expose [myself] to” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). one example of the way i actively seek the truth is during class registration when i am choosing professors. i try to choose professors who are not only good teachers, but also will not teach me something that goes against my catholic faith. this is why i talked with pete hlabse, the director of the sorin fellows at the time, for advice on choosing professors before i even got to notre dame. thus, living a life guided by the castillo 5 truth means that i stay true to my catholic faith and keep in mind the source of the knowledge that i am gaining. this is my mission statement. i plan on continue to live out this mission through the examples i have outlined above. and if i mess up, i will always begin again and continue to strive to be a saint in the middle of the world. in this way, i will pursue a life well-lived. 3-2-2022 integration three moreau first-year experience a life truly lived well this eulogy is being printed posthumously after ryan wrote it himself which is why it is written in the first person. he asked that this self-reflection be printed instead of a traditional eulogy to give people a more accurate and deep idea of his life. looking back on my life, i find that self-reflection is something that i have really improved on throughout my life. growing up, like any kid, i was living a fast and busy life without much of a break. in those times i really could have used just a moment each day to look at myself and figure out where i was going and why. a quote that i read once that i feel really embodied this is “it can be strange to see mind training — going nowhere, in effect — being brought to such forward-pushing worlds”(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one). reading that when i was younger i just pushed it off as nonsense, but as i got older i wanted to be confident that i can be remembered as someone who was able to reflect on both their current situation and their past. that is part of my goal in writing this self eulogy, to practice reflection on the man who i became, and how i want that man to be remembered. first i would like to examine the questions that i asked myself in order to live a life well-lived. the first was the question of what makes me happy? i find that family brings me the most happiness so i thought that just prioritizing that al the time would be best for me. in reality, though something that i heard when i was younger reminded me that just happiness is not always the goal. “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”(“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). thinking of this always reminds me that sometimes you must sacrifice happiness in the moment for long term joy. the moment is not always the most important thing but instead, i should prioritize long-term joy. sometimes i had to give up spending some time with my family in order to have greater joy in possible other aspects of my life. and i did do this and it ended up bringing me great joy. the next section of this will cover when i asked myself in what ways i could live my life. i wanted to find more ways to get involved in new things and do what i love. i wanted to get as much out of life as possible, and when i look back i think that i did that. i made sure to get involved with things outside of school and my job, and i made sure to explore enough to find what i truly enjoy. i used to worry a lot about what i was going to do with my life and in particular how my major would influence that. then i heard this “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life. a common phrase we hear at the center for career development (ccd) is “i’m a [insert name of major] major what can i do with that?”(“navigate your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). this reminds me that my major specifically, but also other big decisions in my life are often always not permanent. choosing my major is very important, but it does not inherently decide what my life path will be. this kind of attitude reminded me to take risks and pushed me to do things i otherwise would not have done. next, i would like to explore how i discerned what a life well lived was. i had a lot to work through at various times and i often used my dad to help me discern what to do. one time i called him for a school assignment looking for answers and he gave me a lot of interesting insight. my dad told me something that he said is difficult to say but i needed to hear. it’s that i am very intelligent but i have a lot of growth to do in terms of focusing and really paying attention to detail. since elementary school, i have been the first person to finish tests, been writing essays in one night, and been doing homework as quickly as possible. hearing this really helped me examine how i can live my life better and where i can improve to overcome new challenges. finally i would like to look at how i can make this reflection on my life worthwhile and not just a recounting of principles i tried to live by. to help influence this i remembered that once i read that “ we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started”(“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). this is where i want to look at the use of my writing my own eulogy and why i feel like it will benefit me. through this, i have been able to examine deeply how i lived my life, what i feel worked in it, and what i feel that i did not. in many memories and anecdotes that are not included directly in this eulogy i have been able to examine through the lens of these principles how well i lived my life. and, while i do not think i lived it perfectly, i feel like i lived it as well as i could have. i made improvements, cared about others, and took good care of myself throughout my long and fruitful life. i decided to take a deeper look at how and why i lived my life the way i did and i hope that all of you, like me, can learn from this abnormal exercise that i have brought upon myself.. rather than just think about and reminisce on what happened in my life i want everyone to remember why i did the things i did, and how i impacted everyone who i met. i want the main memory of me to not be my actions, rather how my actions impacted those around me. moreau capstone integration lelonis 1 theo helm moreau spring 29 april 2020 building blocks in life, my mission is to build. i aspire to build my knowledge, never taking for granted each opportunity to learn and grow my mind. equally, i yearn to build a successful career and reputation. i want to be proud of who i become through my hard work and dedication to my craft. i also have big dreams of building a family. i want to spend my life surrounded by the people who i love most. when i find myself on my deathbed, i will not wish for anything other than more time to spend with those who i love. all in all my mission is to build, creating a happy, healthy, successful life for not only myself but those who i surround myself with. throughout this integration i strive to answer the question of, “how do i pursue a life well-lived?” within the realm of my mission statement. i will incorporate aspects from all weeks of moreau in order to describe how i will build a life well lived through knowledge, occupation, and family endeavors. first, i will elaborate on building a life well lived through the acquisition of knowledge. throughout the second semester moreau course, i have become increasingly enlightened about what it means to be a knowledgeable person. in doing so, i have developed a passion for increasing my intellect and growing internally. within week eleven, i was struck by something that resonated heavily with me. within a podcast, it was stated that, “it is our job to stay informed” (“passion isn't enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). as a straight, white, upper-middle class male, it would be easy for me to not stay informed. it would https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ lelonis 2 be easy to turn a blind eye to the toils and troubles that plague our world. i aspire to never allow myself to get comfortable, expanding my knowledge to understand the problems of the world and which i hope will grant myself the opportunity to fight against them. additionally, another instrumental component of knowledge within a life well lived is the ability to spread it. what is the point of growing the mind if it isn't used to assist the minds of others. with the knowledge that i accrue, i plan on passing it along to those who seek it. however, before i can do that, i must be able to obtain knowledge in the first place. in other words, “good teachers are usually good learners” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i must first learn before i can teach. moreover, in week two we learned about open mindedness and its importance. within the hesburgh film, it was stated that, “you can’t censor ideas if they disagree with your own” ("hesburgh" produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). this quote further accentuates how vital it is to learn before you teach. if you are not willing to open your mind and allow unfamiliar ideas and concepts in, growth will not happen and the development of knowledge will be stagnant. i plan to live life with an open mind, which will allow me to acquire the knowledge i so covet. finally, similar to being open minded, the last component of a knowledgeable, well-lived life for me comes through risk-taking. i truly believe that chances make champions. every chance is an opportunity for growth, regardless of the outcome. within week four we learned that, “every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it at the time or not!” (“navigating your career journey” by the murelo family center moreau fye week four). experiences are fundamental to the mechanism of growth, and i plan to take advantage of any and all opportunities that allow me to build my knowledge in pursuit of a life well-lived. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/modules/items/143444 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ lelonis 3 the next building block of an ideal life for me deals with my career. since i was a young child, i had always had dreams of being successful, working for myself, giving opportunities to others. those dreams remain, but i now must build my way to them. before entering moreau, i was uncertain about where i was heading, and what my future was going to look like. i had a vague path outlined in my head, but i didn’t know who i wanted to become, or what field of work i wanted to go into. however, one week we learned about the concept of “memento mori”, which translates to “remember that you die”. nun ruth graham asserted that we are to, “intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). upon receiving this message, i was able to think deeper about me and my legacy. one day i will die, so i need to work to become the man that i want to be known as. this led me to channel my inner talents, being numerical.y oriented and business savvy, pushing me toward the field of finance. in this field i plan to establish myself, building a reputation for my relentless work ethic. additionally, a large part of my career will be centered around building success. however, success does not come easy, and as we learned in a short film during week six, “suffering is part of our lives, it is always there, it is about how to respond to suffering.” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). suffering, pain, fatigue, adversity, it's all inevitable. i aspire to build myself through adversity, using it as a platform to grow and learn. it takes failure to be able to succeed, and i now know that if i want to enjoy a life well-lived, i must be willing to fight for it. finally, the last component of my occupation within my ideal life is what follows my success. one day i will find success, simply because i will not stop until i do so. however, once i had built myself from the ground up and “made it” as some would say, i will pride myself on never changing who i am. in week ten we discussed the golden https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 lelonis 4 rule, more specifically, “christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” moreau fye week ten). one of my dad’s good friends is a wildly successful businessman. though my dad is a blue collar laborer who makes a mere fraction of what his friend does, his friend treats him as an equal, never less. i look up to people like this, and i plan to take on those shoes during my career. i will strive to remain humble, treating everyone with the kindness and respect that all human beings deserve. finally, the last and most important aspect of a life well-lived comes from building relationships and a family. this will forever trump the importance of my knowledge and job, as i have come to learn that friends and family are the only thing that truly matters in life. items come and go, things and places change, and more money is printed every day. however, family is forever invaluable. sadly, in today's world, “people's paths are riddled with suffering, as everything is centered around money, and things, instead of people” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). in a true life well-lived i will steer away from materialism, choosing to pursue people and relationships instead of money and cars. one day, we will all pass, nobody will remember the cars. but people will remember who you are on the inside and how you treated others. personally, i plan on giving everything i can to my future family. the reason that i want to build my knowledge and career is so i can use my wisdom to guide my children, and use my occupation to provide a happy, comfortable life for my family. when i asked my father what it is that i aspire to do with life he stated, “i have never met someone in life with more focus on bettering the lives of those around them” (brian lelonis per week five interview moreau fye week five). personally, i find this to be true, as there is no feeling more rewarding than that of giving. during the final week of classes, i picked up on what i believe to be the most applicable quote to me and my https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1cmpxfuglolnnvrd3dpa8o83swcn5wb-bdifmpaxahqq/edit lelonis 5 story. the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross stated, “the farther we go in giving the more we stand to receive” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the holy cross congregation moreau fye week twelve). i plan to build a family, giving them everything and more so that i receive more. for me, my ‘more’ is fulfillment. in life, i yearn for nothing more than to see the people who i love smile. i am going to build a life that creates happiness for those around me. at the end of the day, all we have is each other. the technology, cars, houses, clothes, it's all a mere distraction from the true prize of life, love. in the first week class, there was a quote that stated, “i’d be richer in what i prize most: days and hours' ' (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyers moreau fye week one). to me, days and hours are the only thing i prize, everything else holds no true value. a life well-lived can be decompartmentalized into many components, all of which are trivial in comparison to family. time with the ones you love is true currency, and it is never increasing, only decreasing. a life well-lived takes every day and appreciates it for the opportunities to spend time with loved ones, as that's what we have in our pockets when everything else shakes out. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ microsoft word final capstone integration.docx taylor kelly moreau first year experience 29 april 2022 the larger picture a life well-lived lived looks different for every person, but for me, , there are multiple steps to achieving a life well-lived. i believe that although morbid, to live a life welllived requires the acknowledgment of my inevitable of death. when i feel myself holding back from opportunities and experiences out of fear, anxiety, doubt, shame, or laziness, i remind myself that my time here on earth is short (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham – moreau fye week three). i remind myself that to hold myself back is to rob myself of the life that i deserve. my worst fear is the moment on my death bed when i ask myself “what could my life have been if i just tried harder and stayed true to myself?” i can remind myself about death by making a list of long-term goals and the steps i need to take to achieve those goals. by revisiting this lift every few days, i remind myself that there are real-life deadlines approaching—deadlines for life experiences that i don’t want to miss out on. thankfully i had the opportunity to write my own eulogy, anticipating the rest of my life, under the assumption that i had led a life well-lived. transferring my long-term goals onto paper really made me question how i want to be remembered (“the final chapter” by – moreau fye week eight). in my mission statement, i wrote: “i hope to leave a positive impact on people that i spend time with. i hope that when i have a conversation with someone, they walk away smiling” (“personal mission statement” by – moreau fye week thirteen). this statement, although quite simple, answers the question of how i want to be remembered. the assignment of writing a eulogy was truly enlightening, as it also served as a reminder that despite challenges, it is in fact possible for me to succeed in living my best life. the part of my eulogy that i struggled most with writing was the section about the career path i will choose. this was a challenge because as of right now, i am not set on my major, let alone my future career. learning about notre dame’s meruelo family center for career development helped calm my anxieties about my future career path by letting me know of the vast resources available to me. in “navigating your career journey,” the phrase: “there is no ‘best major’ out there but there is a ‘best major for you’” is emphasized (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i find comfort in the fact that there is a major that will set me up for success after college, leading me on the right path to a fulfilling career. i tend to confide in my dad when i need advice about grown-up things such as career options. i immediately feel better after talking to my dad about his personal experience in discerning his career. in the next three years, i will discern my major and my career path by engaging in conversation with upperclassmen about their experiences in discernment. whether that be through the career center, my sister’s friends, or having older student as a classmate, i will find ways to connect with upperclassmen. it comforts me to know that they were in the same position that i am in today. i know that all i need sometimes is a little inspiration, because my dad has taught me by way of example the importance of hard work and determination. in our conversation of discernment, he reminded of my natural problem skills. i am lucky to be able to harness this strength as i go through life because i know it will help me pursue a life well-lived (“week five discernment conversation activity” – moreau fye week five). to be able to problem solve, one must possess the motivation to solve problems in the first place. intellectual curiosity is a huge motivator, which is why i believe that having an undying intellectual curiosity of the major that i will study is a necessity. hard work and determination stems from intellectual curiosity and gratitude, and in my next three years, i will still be working extremely hard. one of the only differences i will see in my work ethic is that i don’t have the scary requirement of getting a 3.5 gpa looming over me. i think i will have a better relationship with school in the next three years just as i get to know myself better and learn to trust myself. my mission statement opens with: “i, , have a thirst for knowledge and love of learning that i use in all my pursuits” (“personal mission statement” by – moreau fye week thirteen). my intellectual curiosity is what motivates me in not just school, but in everyday life. i believe that i am constantly learning from the people around me, especially the brilliant people i have had the honor to work with at notre dame and holy cross college. for example, having a relationship with my english teacher at holy cross significantly improved my writing. she conveyed to me the principles of good rhetoric so clearly which was fascinating because i have struggled with this in the past. i can continue to learn from others by always engaging in class discussion to the best of my ability and making an effort to branch out in my dorm community next year. the more people i meet, the more i will learn. it is very important to me that i stay connected to holy cross in some way, whether that be returning to meet with my favorite professors or getting food at siggy dining hall. the tri-campus community is truly a community like no other. part of what makes this community so special is the impact and lasting legacy of father theodore hesburgh, former president of notre dame. fr. hesburgh was an extraordinary man; his life is the perfect example of a life well-lived. in my personal mission statement, i wrote “i aspire to be a light for others in the darkness of life’s difficulties, struggles, and tragedies” (“personal mission statement” by – moreau fye week thirteen). fr. hesburgh was a light to not just the notre dame community, but the entire world. throughout his life he sought justice for every human being and worked to spread peace in our world during a time of great divide—the civil rights movement. fr. hesburgh’s ability to inspire and his incessant ambition is rooted in his faith. it is through faith that fr. hesburgh declares his mission to accelerate the progress of the civil rights movement, as he seeks to imitate the life of christ (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). i plan be a light in the midst of darkness these next three years by making everyone i encounter feel welcome, safe, respected, and loved. i can do this by staying politically informed, and by being a good listener. i wonder how fr. hesburgh would respond to the political climate of today in wake of the black lives matter movement? in his letter to the notre dame community, dean g. marcus cole writes: “while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it” (“dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except i, can breathe. and i can do something’” by dean g. marcus cole – moreau fye week twelve). just as fr. hesburgh did, dean g. marcus cole uses his position to restore justice in our nation starting with the notre dame community. i can dean g. marcus cole is another example of a man leading a life well-lived. in, “dean g. marcus cole: ‘i am george floyd. except i, can breathe. and i can do something,’” he discusses his experiences with racism. how explains how racism has traumatized african-american people, including him and his family. despite this sad reality, dean cole responds to the suffering of his racial community by pursuing a career in law, becoming dean of one of our nation’s best law schools. both father hesburgh and dean g. marcus cole are inspirations to me, and i would not consider my life a life well-lived if i did not act with the same courage as they have. just as dean cole lays out his plan of action and response to suffering, in “teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together,” steve reifenberg explains that the best way to respond to suffering is through accompaniment. reifenberg says: “not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied – to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg – moreau fye week nine). in other words, when helping someone deal with their own suffering, there must be an interdependence between the person suffering, and the person accompanying them. being able to relate to someone who is suffering is a display of true vulnerability. accompaniment makes such a difference because humans are stronger together. i believe i am being called to accompany my fellow gateway students as we take a huge, scary step in our lives next year. i can do this by attending gateway dinners and other reunion events. i can say the same when we are all seniors, still a family, taking an even bigger step out into the real world. in helping one another through accompaniment, we are able to form genuine human connections rooted in vulnerability. connections like these are relationships of a life well-lived. fr. greg boyle speaks on idea of forming relationships in “chapter 8: jurisdiction.” he returns to the theme of tearing down the walls and breaking down the barriers that separate people in our society. although forming relationships has been a struggle for me due to my fear of vulnerability, i understand the importance of embracing the overwhelming emotions that come with being upfront and honest. this is something i have been actively working on in pursuit of a life well-lived and i truly believe that i am up for the challenge (“chapter 8: jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle, s.j. – moreau fye week seven). being vulnerable with my classmates has been a challenge this year. it helps to remind myself that if i am not vulnerable, or not acting like my true self, then i will never find my people. breaking down walls and tearing down barriers is a common theme in the pursuit of a life well-lived. the only way to truly practice inclusion is to connect with others through not just finding similarities but also appreciating differences. embracing differences is something that i wish was more prevalent in our society. political polarization has become a big problem that must be addressed. as mentioned in my mission statement, i believe a thirst for knowledge is an essential part of a life well-lived. one cannot gain knowledge without engaging in intellectual conversation in which he or she has the is able to reasonably disagree while fully absorbing the ideas of those with whom they disagree (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week eleven). there is so much to be learned from those with differing opinions based on different backgrounds, perspectives, and life experiences—you just need to include those people your own conversation. in the next three years, i will make sure to place myself in classes that will not just academically challenge me, but also challenge my beliefs. i am excited to be able to learn from my future classmates at notre dame through collaboration in class. as a part of a guide to student life, the text “the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” communicates: “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by university of notre dame – moreau fye week ten). i can feel the love when i step onto campus at notre dame, however, as a gateway student, i feel like an outcast sometimes. although this feeling is nothing compared to social justice issues plaguing other groups in society and i can fully acknowledge my own privilege, i would like to point out how my experience as a gateway has impacted me. i have learned how to be comfortable with being uncomfortable and i have learned to appreciate the unique perspective i bring to my notre dame classes as a gateway student. i can confidently say i am well equipped with the tools to deal with issues of exclusion in my next 3 years at notre dame and beyond. i am proud of how i have turned what i initially viewed as an obstacle in the way of getting to notre dame into an opportunity to grow. everyone has their struggle or main obstacle preventing them from reaching something. for dr. jimhoon kim, it is his paralysis that was his obstacle and object of suffering; but now, he expresses gratitude, for this tragedy has brought him so much closer to god (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). encountering suffering in my future is inevitable, but it is an important aspect of life—even a life well-lived. dr. jimhoon kim’s story of how he turned around his situation is evidence of a life well-lived and i can only hope to brave and wise as he is one day. a section of my mission statement connects to this topic: “i do my best to stay grounded, not taking my blessings for granted” (“personal mission statement” by – moreau fye week thirteen). i know that the gratitude and the strength to overcome struggle are principles essential to my life moving forward. i can practice gratitude on a daily basis by incorporating words of thankfulness in my prayers and private moments with god. the integration of all thirteen weeks of moreau is the perfect way to end my freshman year of college with self-reflection. the first thing we discussed as a class week one is the importance of slowing down our lives to be able to self-reflect. a quote that i read this first week that has stuck with me ever since, is from the text “why we need to slow down our lives.” pico iyer says: “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). when i step back and look at the canvas which is my life, i will see the things i’ve learned at notre dame in every moment. the further i step backward, the clearer the canvas becomes. i’ll see my love of learning, my appreciation for the small joys, my desire to help carry the burdens of others, my gratitude, my courage in vulnerability, my nature of inclusion, and my ability to embrace differences. i hope that as i take my last step, the larger picture that i see is a life well-lived. integration three | professor taylor | integration three the relentless pursuit of happiness: my eulogy for many, evan was a man of character, of humor, and most importantly, a man who was constantly trying to improve both his happiness and others. early on in his life, evan was faced with struggles that although were hard for him to overcome at the time, were integral in forming the evan that we celebrate here today. evan was faced with the divorce of his parents, various schisms in his own family, and the deaths of several loved ones that were his role models. while evan was at times stressed about his work and trying to make those around him happy, he was never shy to crack a joke to make everyone else and himself laugh in the face of hardship. dr. arsenault truly lived by pico iyer’s concept of “stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). we all should live and lead by evan’s example of being able to balance his rigorous life as a doctor and as a family man. evan was committed to giving his children the best environment possible growing up, and they are tremendous people today because of it. as i mentioned before, evan was a man that belonged not only to his family but to his numerous friends that he was constantly there for. similar to one of his role models while he was at the university of notre dame studying to become a doctor, both he and father hesburgh had the “price of belonging to everybody is probably belonging to nobody” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). those that loved evan came to notice that sometimes he would give himself to so many different people that he didn’t have a “group” at times that he could identify with. regardless, evan did come to find himself and to promote his happiness. there was never a day that went by where i didn’t see him smiling and laughing. evan wanted to be remembered not as a doctor, but as a person of passion, humility, and selflessness. in his world, the definition of a “life well-lived” was led by looking out for those that you care most about and providing for them. by uplifting others, evan was truly a person that made this world a better place. when we all look back at evan’s life, it truly is a tremendous story. but his story is not just full of super happy moments, but moments of adversity. a story that evan used to always tell was one of his senior year of high school. evan was overwhelmed with the questions of where he was going to college and on top of this was faced with several injuries that kept him from doing some of his favorite physical activities. despite having all of these things placed on top of him, evan kept the same mentality as sister theresa aletheia. evan believed that “in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). by getting through one of the hardest times of his life, evan was able to go to the university of notre dame, make a ton of friends, and become the evan that we are celebrating today. some of the best things that we will get in this life are from some of the hardest things that we encounter. we should not be sad that evan has passed, rather, we should be happy that we got to encounter such a great man in the first place. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html we all know and love evan for the great person that he was, but we must also acknowledge the love and the passion that he had for his career as a doctor. evan came to realize that he wanted to choose a profession where he could help people. evan truly realized that a great career is one that “is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by luzzo, d.a., & severy, l.e. moreau fye week four). his calling as a doctor was so much more than just the respect that comes with being a physician. evan believed that helping others and being involved in a job that requires high-level thinking was what he wanted to do. evan truly believed that he could save lives and he did. throughout his career, he was able to help thousands of people and not only help them but build relationships with them. evan lived his life through being able to relate to others and not only reflecting on what he had to say about himself as a person but what others had to say about him as a person. one of the most influential people in evan’s life was his mother. evan’s mom was his #1 fan. not only would she always keep things straight with evan about things he was doing right and the things he was doing wrong but she would also just love to have conversations with him about how to be a great person. evan was a man that when faced in the eyes of adversity could easily get in the zone. a specific moment when he was in the zone that his mother was proud of him for was when he was waitlisted at notre dame. evan tried his hardest to get into nd and in the end, had the opportunity to attend (“week five discernment conversation activity” by moreau first year experience moreau fye week five). evan was able to reflect upon some of the things his mother said he valued and turn into an even better person. by looking at the things that we value in life, we can develop a great outlook on who we are and who we want to become. some of the things that we can look back on today that evan did so great was to always look on the positive side of things. despite having several things happen to him that he could not get around no matter what, whether that be the countless injuries that he endured or his family issues from a young age, evan was always looking at the things that he could do instead of looking at the things that he couldn’t. evan came to model his career after paraplegic dr. jihoon kim and was inspired by his story of being able to do wonderful things even though he was stuck in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. one of evan’s favorite quotes from dr. kim was involving the light that kim looked for in his everyday life. “but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). evan truly served as a blessing for us and wanted everyone to be able to see the light in everything no matter how hard things got. of all things that were important to evan, the most important thing was his religion. evan modeled his life after the teachings of the church and truly wanted to be the best follower of god that he could be. evan saw pope francis as a key role model in his life and wanted to follow his model of letting go of the judgment of others to create a community that we could all live in and be included. (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by ted moreau fye week seven). evan wanted to be the good samaritan in the story of several people’s lives. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript whether it was his patients at work or his own family and friends, he was always putting their well-being above his. we are all better people for having encountered evan as a person. in the end, he did live such a good life. a life that was full of passion, caring, and happiness. although we will never be able to see that smile on his face again, we all know he is smiling in heaven looking down on us. a life well lived was a great friend, mentor, and leader. he left a lasting impact on the world around him and in our hearts. i will always be proud to call him my friend. sebastian always contributed his success to his alma mater, the university of notre dame. upon arriving at the university, he was very unsure about what he wanted to do in life. he felt reassured by the meruelo family center for career development, where he read that, “there seems to be this commonly held belief in our society that a major equals a certain career path” (meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). fortunately, the good people at the career center taught him that this was a common misconception, and he felt much more at ease after hearing this. he also learned how to get more in touch with himself while at notre dame. as a southerner, he had always been raised to avoid emotional questions and not be too introspective. he always felt like it was better to ignore the things you didn’t understand or couldn’t deal with rather than confront them head on. perhaps this is due to the fact that, “evidence shows the simple act of translating our emotions into language — versus simply experiencing them — can stop our brains from activating our amygdala” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way” by tasha eurich – moreau fye week 6). essentially, if we are not introspective in the correct way, we can actually limit our body’s ability to deal with our emotions, rather than actually dealing with them in a healthy way. having learned about new ways of dealing with his own mind and mental health, he began to take time to rest, reflect on the day, his life, the challenges he faced, and the challenges he had overcome. he strongly believed in the need to take a break and rest. he believed that, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau fye week 1). after graduation, he attended harvard law school, and was hired by one of the most prestigious lobbying firms in the country. as a lobbyist, it was his job to help interest groups get their agendas passed through congress. he was tasked with bridging many different interest groups in order to get things done. sometimes it was extremely challenging, as there was so much partisan gridlock in congress, and many groups refused to even come to the negotiating table. he always believed in the importance of having conversations and bringing together opposing viewpoints. therefore, he pursued cooperation and bipartisanship even when such collaborations seemed impossible. he always said that, “true leadership has been the people who could bridge two ideologies” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau fye week 2). the work that father hesburgh did to impact the world including brokering peace talks between the ussr and the united states and working on the civil rights commission always served as a great inspiration to sebastian. after lobbying congress for years, he decided to join it. he ran for us senate in texas and was elected by a landslide vote. he worked to serve the state of texas and represent his constituents in the best possible manner. after 2 terms as a senator, he lost his third term in a controversial election. though his constituents widely supported a policy he voted against it because he believed that it would be bad for the state in the long run. his advisors knew that it would cost him the election; however, he believed that, “we have to be willing to hear what others need and to give ourselves in response even when our attempt to respond may not be appreciated” (“three key questions” fr. michael himes – moreau fye week 3). but though his professional career was impressive, he took so much more pride in his personal life. to give back to his beloved university he joined irish compass, where he helped notre dame students discern careers in politics and always offered internships to the students of the university (irish compass – moreau fye week 5). his proudest achievement was his children. his oldest son, a very successful football player, played wide receiver at the university of notre dame where he won two national championships. he followed in his father’s footsteps and went on to law school at harvard. he is currently serving as the attorney general for the state of texas and is considering a run for governor. his younger son, played lacrosse for notre dame. he went on to business school at the university of texas. after graduation, he accepted a job as an executive for exxon-mobil where he still works today. his daughter, was fascinated by international relations. much to her father’s chagrin, she attended georgetown university. after graduation, she joined the us state department and studied east asia. she now runs a non-profit organization dedicated to women’s empowerment around the globe. sebastian always believed in seeing people around him as equals and treating them with respect. this was a trait that had been instilled in him from a very young age. no matter who you were, he made you feel welcome and part of his family. he always emphasized an importance on trying to get to know people before judging them. as a politician, he was known for having many friends on the opposite side of the aisle. when i asked him about this, he emphasized the importance of walking a mile in someone else’s shoes. he believed that his colleagues had a strong commitment to making the country better, they just came from a different background than him and, therefore, had different ideas on how to do that. he was always fond of looking at things from alternative perspectives. one quote that always stuck with him was, “close both eyes; see with the other one” (“tattoos on the heart, jurisdiction” by fr. greg boyle – moreau fye week 7). week 8integration three integration 3 thigpen a life of doing i want to be remembered as someone who lives in the moment. i feel like i have worked on building my personal brand as someone who is always present in conversation. through my time here at notre dame i’ve discovered how i want to be seen, as well as what gives me the greatest sense of fulfillment. i think it is important to maintain a healthy distance between real life and life on the internet. if i was able to, i wouldn’t be on my phone after friday night until monday morning. i used to attend a summer camp up on the border of minnesota and canada. it was a break from all electronics for a full month during the summer. while i was there i had nothing to worry about and no need for my phone. “i continue to keep the cornucopia of technology at arm’s length so that i can more easily remember who i am, (why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer, ted moreau fye week one)”. life seemed simpler without all the technology and trying to keep up with my friends online. i know i am my most genuine self when i am communicating with friends face to face. this brings me comfort because i know i can rely on the relationships i have cultivated. “what gives you joy? what is the source of your joy?(three key questions, fr. michael himes -moreau fye week three)”.i find joy in accomplishments and knowing i have made days worthwhile. i make an effort at the end of every day to reflect on some positive thing that either happened to me or someone i care about. i talked to my dad for a long time recently about what it really means to have had a “worthwhile” first year. the peak of the swim has passed and i have had some internal struggles about my performance. it is a major accomplishment to make the acc team and i am proud to say i was chosen for the team as a freshman. we had the meet this last weekend and i didn’t swim as well as i knew i could. it seems like i cannot be content with the success i have had because i knew i was faster last year. “faith, service, learning, or work, are the key components to being an exemplary member of the notre dame community, (hesburgh, produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley -moreau fye week two)”. i had to remember that there is much more to my college and notre dame experience than just swimming. everything considered, i still have made great friends, kept good grades and have had a mostly good season of swimming. i want to be remembered as a “do-er” of things. i want people to think of the times we went out on a whim and had a great time. “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life, (navigating your career journey, meruelo family center for career development -moreau fye week four)”. there are big things i want to do and so many places i want to go. i have set big goals that are long term but i also believe it's important to be able to somewhat let go of bigger stresses and disassociate from bigger issues. it’s easy to get bogged down in all the assignments i have throughout the year. i've learned to find a good balance between taking things one day at a time and also making smart decisions to benefit myself in the long run. i’ve now started to make weekly goals that i know are achievable that help the time go by. i want to maintain good relationships with my friends and my family https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143819 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143798 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143798 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ back home. i now make an effort to call my parents more often and spend time with my dorm friends. i hope they remember me as someone who really tried to keep relationships strong. the partner i picked to have the week 5 conversation with was my best friend from my dorm, jd brown. we started talking about why we think we became friends. i believe i am drawn towards people who are very socially aware and treat others with respect. jd and i both have a great sense of humor and we believe our energy bounces off of each other which creates a fun environment for both of us. this similar personality is great for our relationship because we both know what makes the other one laugh. jd is also someone who’s not afraid to tell you the truth. he is a very real and genuine person which i think is a major part of our friendship. i know he can hold me accountable and responsible for things that i do. i think we both hold each other to higher standards and push each other to be better people. “there are many ways to practice mindfulness both alone and in community, (the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich, ted conferences -moreau fye week six)”. this was one of the most introspective conversations i’ve ever had. there are not many times i’ve really discussed the depth of a friendship until this. this activity was one of the best examples of community mindfulness i could think of. since then i’ve had more of these types of conversations with close friends in my dorm and my girlfriend. i hope i am remembered as a facilitator of meaningful conversation. “a single individual is enough for hope to exist, (why the only future worth building includes everyone, pope francis, ted conferences -moreau fye week seven)” even though i know i have a large support group of friends and family, i do agree that just one person believing in you is enough motivation to keep striving. specifically in highschool my coach would tell me he thought i had the potential to swim in college when i was just a freshmen. my family supported and encouraged me but my coach was really the only one who pushed me to excel to the next level. it really was the vision he had for me that gave me hope that i could one day compete at that level. i hope i can translate that experience into doing the same for others. i want to be remembered as someone who pushes others to be the best possible version of themselves. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143883 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/items/143910 moreau integration three a reflection of my life very early on in my life, i made a plan as to how to achieve the best life i could possibly live. i planned on living a traditional life: going to college, getting a job, getting married, having kids, all that. i thought the best way to achieve this was to try to become as successful as possible and make as much money as i could. when making this plan, i thought i would sacrifice so much in order to achieve it because, at the time, i thought this would be the best life for me to live. after living through more of my life, i now realize how awful of a plan this was for me. i’ve realized that what’s most important is building meaningful relationships, prioritizing enjoyment and happiness in what i do, and living a life where i stand strongly in what i believe in. when i was trying to follow life through the plan i had first made, i figured the best way to achieve this was to put all my time and effort into school and academics. especially when i went to notre dame, i felt an immense amount of pressure to be constantly working if i wanted to be successful. i quickly realized how unhealthy this mindset was, and my own mental health suffered greatly from this. “yet it’s precisely those who are busiest, i wanted to tell her, who most need to give themselves a break” ("why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i advise anyone who thinks the way i used to, to listen to this quote i heard from pico iyer, and realize what effects this is having on you and what you may be missing out on. being so focused on wanting a certain kind of success, i feel like i refrained from living in the moment and enjoying myself in many instances. i used to be so focused on my self image and how other people perceived me that i refrained from taking many opportunities in fear of what other people would think of me. i remember when i started my college career at notre https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ dame, i was very nervous in meeting new people and being myself around people i had just met. i wish i had heard the following quote before going to school: “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). ever since i first heard this quote, i promised to myself that i would try to live a life where i just lived in the moment, without hesitating on doing the things i enjoy or want to experience. when i made my original life plan, i said i would do anything, even be alone in the process, in order to achieve my goals. i wasn’t really focused on making very many meaningful connections, and didn’t really think about the simple interactions i had on a day to day basis. i also used to be very comfortable with a small group of people so, i didn’t see the need to have that many other connections. a while back, i heard a quote that said, “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). when i heard this quote, i started to think more and more about the interactions i have on a daily basis. i realized that i take much of these for granted, thinking they would always be there. i also started to realize how important it was to branch out to all different types of people, make meaningful connections with them, and to just learn about their way of life that may be different than yours. i remember when i used to spend so much time dwelling on what i could not do, asking myself, “why can’t i do this” or “why don’t i have this.” asking myself these questions was not healthy and served no purpose because many times i wasn’t able to answer these questions or change something that i was spending so much time thinking about. i learned that being able to move on or just realizing that you can’t change the past is very important. instead, i started asking myself, “what can i do better in the future.” “so i encourage all of us to just focus on what we can do for others or what we can do https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not yet have” ("5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week six). when i heard this quote, i started to not only spend less of my time asking myself why i can’t do something, but i also started to find more valuable ways for me to use this time. during these times, i realized how important it was to see how i could help other people. not only does this help people in need, but it also allows you to strengthen your relationships and connections that are so vital to living a good life. i was asked once, “how do you define a life well-lived?” to that i now say, “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills”(“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). throughout my life, i began to realize more and more that a life well-lived is about so much more than success and your assets. a life well-lived is shown in the healthy relationships you made in your life and the interactions you’ve had. i knew i had made such valuable relationships when i could tell that both i and the other person were comfortable, happy, and supportive of each other. my interactions were meaningful, as i used to learn so much about different ways of life when i began to branch out and found importance in getting to know all different types of people. a life well-lived is also one that was lived with no regrets. i quickly learned that i couldn’t dwell too much on the past, but instead i had to learn from it and incorporate that into my future. i realized i needed to start living in the moment and taking opportunities while they were still available. i saw myself starting to take more risks and putting less pressure on myself. from this, even if i didn’t always enjoy a new experience, at least i learned that about myself and was able to say that i went through it for myself. lastly, i think a life well-lived is shown through the messages and values you represent and spread. once i realized what i valued, i tried to go with this reminder, “we don’t know where we’re going from here, and we don’t know what https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ we’re going to do, but i can guarantee you there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice and at times human stupidity” ("hesburgh” produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). with this quote always in mind, i wanted everyone to know what values i stood for, and i wanted my ideas for a better world to be spread. not too long ago, i had a conversation with my mom and asked her, “what is it that you think i value most?” she responded with, “i think you are very passionate about trying to change old ways of thinking in order to create a more accepting, open-minded, and positive world.” i am glad she had this answer to my question because that is something i am very passionate about and is how i want to be remembered. i want to be remembered as someone who expressed what issues were most important to me and what i stood for. i want to be known as someone who always stood up for their values and actively showed value and desire in changing the world. after reading this, i hope you all remember me as someone who had so much value in building and maintaining meaningful relationships and positive interactions, someone who prioritized my happiness over materialistics objects, and most importantly, someone who truly wanted positive change in the world and stood strongly in their track. https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 capstone social change is a broad and ambiguous term used to describe solutions to an array of problems in our social system in america, but also the world. what does it mean? what can we do to provoke it? do our efforts to be a catalyst for social change even matter when there is so much wrong in the world? these are all valid questions to ask as a human existing in this world, but especially during the times we have been living in the last few years. it is more than normal to feel anxious and helpless when the world is so big and our impact can feel so small. however, if there is one thing i’ve learned during my short first year at notre dame, it’s that our effort and reflective leadership is not only valued, but absolutely necessary for social change. over the past semester in moreau, i’ve discovered that as reflective leaders, we are all agents for change if we want to be. in week twelve of moreau, we talked about wisdom, another broad yet powerful term. i talked about in my own reflection that wisdom is the ability to do two things: open yourself to the wisdom around you and to be able to reflect on your own decisions and learn from them. to touch on the first point, i would say that it takes a wise person to be a reflective leader, and an even wiser person to know to step down when they are not the most knowledgeable on the topic. this reminds me specifically of issues of racism and advocacy within the last two years when the black lives matter movement was a foot. it was evident that most people were unsure of what to do, especially white people. i myself as a white person faced this dilemma. how do you help someone when you yourself are a beneficiary of their oppression by a system that allows it? how can you even contribute to a conversation like that? the answer is that you can’t. i don’t mean that in a way that ignores the issue as a whole, but to listen to and amplify the voices of people who are suffering. being a wise reflective leader is understanding that you won’t know the answer to everything, and handing the leadership role to someone else when that is the case. to address my second point about looking inward, there is no better reference than the source on introspection in week 6. this article goes into depth about what the right type of introspection is, which i think is vital to be wise. specifically, eurich says, “ “why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future.” (introspectioneurichweek 6) what eurich is referencing is our ability to look inwards, notice a problem, and move forwards is the most efficient way to be introspective. i agree with this. if we get caught up in other things while reflecting inwards we eliminate any possibility to grow and become a more wise, reflective leader. like i said before, it is vital to being a leader that we look outwards and listen to the stories that we have never experienced. as a class, we were made to do this in week 11 when we recounted an anti-racist vocabulary lecture of our choice. i chose a lecture by ruby bridges since she is from my hometown and she was a constant figure in my education on civil rights in elementary school. while i thought i knew all there was to know about ms. bridges, her story still shocked me. ruby bridges spoke specifically of her memories of her integration into a white school and what she experienced. i always envisioned ruby bridges to be this stoic hero who fought racism single-handedly at the age of 6. and while bridges is nothing short of brave, the stories i had heard of her all forgot one thing: her humanity. i’d always seen bridges to be this entity stuck in the past, when in actuality she was a child then and has lived a very real, not-story book like life that i pictured. in the lecture, bridges spoke of the toll that her role in the integration took on her family and her parent’s eventual separation. when asked if she would allow her own child to integrate a school she responded, “ i could not let my child endure what i did.” (ruby bridgesweek 11) i hadn’t even considered the collateral damage little six year old ruby had caused in her own personal life when she had no real idea of what was going on. ruby spoke of the years that followed her integration of the school and what i realized was that i was listening to a very real woman who had endured racism and hate since she could remember. she was not a character in my elementary curriculum or a fact to be memorized on a flash card, but a little girl grown up to be a woman. something i learned was that in order to be a reflective leader of many you must bring humanity back to the people suffering.when considering this point, i was immediately transported back to week 5 when we watched the tedx talk with the pope. specifically he said, “ let us help each other remember that the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face.the you is always a real “presence”, a person to take care of.” (pope francisweek 5) people aren’t just statistics, poster children, or infographics; they are humans who deserve empathy and compassion. we must as reflective leaders love the ‘other’ for the sake of themselves and not for the appeasing of our own conscience. when considering ruby’s story, one thing kept coming to mind: empathy. empathy was the topic of conversation during week 9 when we watched the video of the commencement speech. it stuck out to me in particular to me when louise richardson said, “to see the world from another’s perspective is a critical life skill. it is a hallmark of a vibrant society and a civilized society. it is one of the first casualties of warfare.” (louise richardsonweek 9) richardson’s eloquent words are indeed eloquent and timeless as they are as relevant today as they were when she spoke them in 2018. in fact, the first thing i thought of when revisiting this video is the war in ukraine. there is a criminal lack of empathy for the people suffering there. it is imperative that we find it in ourselves to have empathy for these people rather than just watching their stories on the news, saying we feel sorry, and clicking to the next channel. being a reflective leader means having empathy for the people and their pain that you will never feel. a good example to look for this is fr. hesburgh. he, a white priest who was the president of a prestigious educational institution, found it in himself to have empathy for those specifically being oppressed during the civil right’s movement. in week 2 when we watched his movie, i was inspired by his lack of hesitation to support martin luther king jr. when he had no reason other than his own conviction. he felt the moral responsibility to be empathetic towards the african american community and his reflective leadership was instrumental. to revisit the main question of how to be a reflective leader in a world in need of a lot of social change, i can say that moreau has opened my eyes. being a reflective leader is not about being the loudest in the room, the most powerful, or the most intelligent, but about being the most sensitive and thoughtful. a lot of issues of today are very precarious and through moreau i understand that in order to be an agent for change in a tumultuous world, we must approach these issues with intentions for good, an open mind, care, and grace. integration 3 living a good life thank you so much, everyone, for coming to celebrate caterina calderon’s life. i am sure we will all miss her laugh and unique way of looking at life. i am certain that we can all remember her as the caring person she was; she might not have been one that enjoyed giving out hugs, but she did have a way of making us all feel better when we were sad and supported through our toughest times. caterina was so passionate about her friendships, work, and family. she was born in san jose, costa rica, to her two parents, eduardo and marisabel, where she grew up alongside her sister, luisana. caterina gave immense value to her family, she supported them and was supported by them throughout her life, as i am sure most of you know. her mother was her role model, marisabel taught caterina about love and care in every way possible and to always see the good in others. i remember many times when caterina discussed her admiration for her mother and her ideas, without a doubt a person she was largely influenced by. i also recall the amazing bond they shared, and how close they always were. her father was also of great importance to her, as she would always mention to her work partners, her work ethic and practices came from observing him through his lifetime. a peer told me recently that above all, she chose to have fun at work, as according to her “that was just as important as the work itself”, and the joy she brought to everyone's life is proof of this (why we need to slow down our lives, pico lyer moreau fye week 1). caterina’s parents were key factors to the person she was. in caterina’s senior spotlight in high school, her professors described her enthusiasm and hard work in school. after working very hard she was accepted into the university of notre dame. attending the school, she made the best friends of her life, being caring and considerate towards them. being so close to her family back home, it was hard for her to start a new life in america, but like everything she did in her lifetime, she persisted and succeeded. caterina, when https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/modules/items/146715 questioned about success and persistence always remembered her time at notre dame, the difficulty she went through, and how she overcame them, she used to quote father hesburgh’s persistence in his life, and related this idea to one her father used to tell her "o não você já tem", he would say, that would mean that “you can't know if you don't try” leading her to always try because there was always a possibility for greatness. caterina lived by this, living a life well-lived. (hesburgh, jerry barca, and christine o’malleymoreau fye week 2). caterina was an opportunity taker, if an opportunity was available, she would grab onto it, she worked in various places until she found the perfect job for her, working in a large scale company while always keeping an emphasis on advocating for those in need with social impact projects. (navigating your career journey moreau first year experience couse, meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week 4). caterina was widely successful at work, but what stands out the most to me is that she never forgot her origins or passions. caterina was selfless, she put others' wishes and needs above hers, and was always willing to help. the most important thing for her at times was her dachshund, pedro jose, whom she carried in her heart all of the time. the devotion she had for her dog was almost as strong as the one she had for her children. her husband attests to this, saying she would often not sleep or eat in order to care for their children and to cuddle up with pedro. her husband passed away a couple of years ago. caterina’s husband's passing was really hard for her, but she was reminded of something their mother used to tell them, that we should pity the living, not the dead, and that soon enough they would be back together, i can only imagine that they are (three key questions, fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). her friends always talk about caterina's desire to help those who need help the most. she believed that everyone deserved the same chance at life, and wanted to give those who were not https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/modules/items/146719 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/files/472740?module_item_id=146728 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/files/472740?module_item_id=146728 as lucky as she had been the same chance to experience life with all of the knowledge and opportunities she herself had enjoyed. she had hopes and dreams most, if not all, of which were accomplished along her lifetime. she sought greatness in whatever she did; volunteering, work, home life etc. she wanted to change the world for the best, "step by step" as she would say, believing that a difference could be made by anyone with passion, honesty, and good intentions. (week five: discerning a life well lived discernment conversation activity, moreau moreau fye week 5). caterina was a child of god, one who always believed that his plan would work out and that she would be blessed enough to enjoy all of the great things life had for her. she believed in devine providence, we would often hear her say "let god take it upon his own hands' ' or "whatever will be will be' '. she would allow life to make its way, believing that everything happened for a reason, including obstacles along the way, the good and the bad. caterina always enjoyed a challenge, even if the consequences did not seem positive at the beginning. although at times she would tell us how hard it was, whenever she came out of it, she was a stronger version of herself, as she used life’s lessons to improve who she was. she knew this about herself, she recognized how bad turned into good, and how bright she shined after, that in addition to her ideas about life finding its path were what made her beautiful, and at times carefree (5 minutes, aria swarr. moreau fye week 6). finally, it is important to note that caterina knew of her sociable and communicative nature. she often quoted the pope, saying: "the future is made of you, it is made of encounters because life flows through relations with others". her nature was always to be her original self with other people, always being there for them, and giving herself to everyone who needed her. it makes sense when we think of the meaning of her name, caterina, since it attests to “purity”, and https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 what was caterina if not a pure, authentic being? (https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_in cludes_everyone/transcript moreau fye week 7) i think we can all agree that we will miss caterina, and definitely never forget her. let us celebrate our cheerful, passionate, loving caterina, who i am sure is up above sitting beside her most loved family looking out for all of us, with a dachshund by her side. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/modules/items/146825 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40247/modules/items/146825 final capstone integration the life-giving force of gratitude mission statement: i want to be remembered by my family, friends, wife, children, and those with who i had the pleasure to work during my career, as a man who was grounded in humility, a leader with infectious enthusiasm and simple goodness, and endless love. i believe the highest good in life is to walk with others, serve others, learn from them, grow from them, and ensure that everything you learn in service is passed down to the next generation. in doing so i will prepare my children for a life of happiness yet challenge grounded by wisdom i have acquired in the service of others. my desire to walk with and serve others stems from my immense gratitude for everything my parents have done and still do for me. i grew up and continue to grow in a position of privilege. i come from a well-off white catholic family in a suburb of pennsylvania and never faced true adversity. i believe that i owe it to those who were not as privileged as me to serve others, both in and out of uniform. serving my country is my main priority, but also serving my community. i envision my service to my community in the form of a mentorship role for underprivileged children, encouraging them to walk the path of love in pursuit of a higher purpose. i want my children to know that they are loved unconditionally, but i will always hold them accountable for their actions. i believe that the most important thing anyone can do in their life is to instill good morals and love in their children in order to create a better future for everyone. growing up, my parents were always hard on me. my father comes from a large family from a very poor part of philadelphia who did not attend college and entered right into the workforce. he never wanted me to grow up as that private school kid who knows nothing about hard work and adversity. i am grateful that he always was hard on me, but showed me, unconditional love. he let me know when i was not working hard enough or being an undisciplined child. i believe that has prepared me for a life in the military where tough love is the only kind of love. i want to imbue my children with that same unconditional yet tough love because that is the legacy i want to leave behind. in my future career as a marine corps officer, if one of my junior marines is failing fitness tests, i will sit them down, and take whatever steps i need to according to the marine corps standards, but when i'm done truly ask them why. i want to understand why they are being lazy with fitness. maybe their situation at home is not healthy or they are suffering from mental illness. i want to hold them accountable, but show them love and walk with them if they are suffering, and actively participate in their recovery. to prepare myself for the inevitable suffering it is important to remind myself that there will be a lot of challenges and suffering in my future. i believe the best way to respond to suffering is to rely on your friends, families, and loved ones that walk with me. by focusing on creating strong relationships now, i am preparing my circle to help me get through difficult times. just as i would help someone else who is suffering. anyone who believes they can suffer alone and overcome that suffering often figures out that it just turns out worse. i want to ensure that i return to the things that i do when i am at my best, am happiest, and most content with the person i am. that is when i am training hard with my friends, whether that be in martial arts, physical fitness, or military training. training hard, challenging ourselves, and overcoming adversity together brings us all together and morale is at its peak when we all sit down for a 7 am breakfast after a hard workout. starting my day off with a challenging workout alongside my closest friends helps me stay centered and focused through the rest of the day, ensuring that i can be my best self in all my interactions. i am also at my best when i am walking with other people who are suffering. i believe i have gotten very good at just listening to people and letting them know that i am there for them and feel the burden they also feel. sometimes that is impossible for me to feel, such as when i talk to one of my best friends aiden. aiden was one of the few black students in my high school. we got very close because we started training brazilian jiu-jitsu together. something about that training environment always led us to have great conversations such as race in our high school. i never noticed the things he noticed, such as when doing a group read and the book had the n-word in it, everyone in the class would glance at aiden. it was subtle things like that that aiden pointed out to me that helped me avoid some of the little prejudice tendencies that made him feel uncomfortable. having those uncomfortable conversations with someone that i trust and care about is how i intend to continue to break down biases and grow to be a more inclusive and understanding man. in order for my mission to be successful, i need to always be finding new ways to challenge myself and grow, i need to continue investing in life-giving relationships and eventually turn all my focus to ensuring my children are in the best possible situation to learn and grow into people of great character. reflection: need to tie everything to gratitude. reflecting on the past 14 weeks in moreau, i want to explore the potential ways in which i can apply the lessons i've learned to the next three years of my life and beyond. the most important lesson i have learned this past year is the importance of gratitude. i am extremely grateful for the opportunities i have been given in my life. yes, i have earned many of them, but i am grateful for the positions i have been put in to accomplish my goals. from a young age, i always had opportunities thrown at me. i was and still am very privileged in that regard. i never needed to work outside of school like some of my friends. i was able to focus on school and sports. i grew up in a safe neighborhood and had a stable home situation. today, i am on full scholarship at the university of notre dame, so many people’s dream school. i am surrounded by some of the best mentors and people i have ever met in my life. i can name at least 10 people that would drop whatever they are doing and come help me with whatever i need. most people can only name 1 or 2. i am very grateful for the relationships i have formed here at notre dame. i've learned that in order for real change to happen everyone needs to take an active role in it. for example, if we want to make non-catholics feel more included on campus, we all need to take a part in that, not just the administration. it takes a little bit of effort from everyone to make real change. “all of us are involved in the mission: those who go out to work and those whose labors sustain the community itself, those in the fullness of their strength and those held back by sickness or by age, those who abide in the companionship of a local house and those sent to live and work by themselves, those in their active assignments and those who are still in training. all of us as a single brotherhood are joined in one communal response to the lord’s mission”(“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” moreau fye week 12). this quote resonates with me because it speaks to how all the members of a community can participate in change. everyone has a part that is crucial for any unjust system to change. father hesburgh comments: “we do not know where to go from here. and we do not know what we're going to do. but i can guarantee you that there are a lot of battles yet to be won for justice. there are a lot of mountains yet to be climbed to overcome human ignorance and human prejudice, and at times human stupidity. there are many songs yet to be sung in the name of joy and happy marriages, and good families, and dedication to all that is good and true and beautiful”(“notre dame commencement 1987” by father hesburgh week 2 moreau). i felt such a strong feeling of appreciation and gratitude for the opportunity i have in attending such an incredible university. fr. hesburgh was so much more than the president of this university. he was a role model for every student. he was a trusted voice for change in america. after having watched this movie, i will feel so much appreciation walking past hesburgh library every day. everyone at notre dame must commit to carrying out father hesburgh's vision of equality and contribute to his legacy. one way we can all work towards eliminating bias and encouraging open conversation is by exposing ourselves to different perspectives. in week 11 of moreau, we learned about how biases grow when we filter out all opposition. “his social network naturally filters friends. so he ends up hearing from a very narrow segment of the population. paul joins a group on his online social network, devoted to championing the benefits of extreme exercise. when some members express concerns about developing unhealthy norms, they are immediately shut down”(“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschkomoreau fye week 11). by avoiding differing opinions, we only reinforce our biases. in order to move forward as a society, we must all commit to being open to having our opinions changed. i am grateful for the friends that i have me at notre dame. i am beginning my journey to being more comfortable with personal things and being vulnerable with at least 3 close friends. from week 10 of moreau, we read an anecdote about a guy growing up gay and catholic: “wow, thanks for telling me,” he said after a minute. “do you want to talk about it?” the knot in my stomach untied, and i let go of the steering wheel. when we got out of the car more than an hour later, we were both laughing and wiping tears from our eyes” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). this reminded me of my friend owen who came out as gay in high school. he was very brave and told our 6 guy friends at the same time. we were all super close friends and none of us saw him any differently. i admired the fact that he sat 6 of his closest guy friends down at the same time and came out to them. that is the epitome of being vulnerable. i wish i had his courage. i learned from that experience that being vulnerable to those who you trust is very important. not only does it make you feel better, it makes the whole group come together. recently, i asked him how he mustered the courage to tell us, and he said he was very afraid but he trusted us and knew we wouldn’t change the way we felt about him. what i took from that conversation was the importance of a few very close friends that you can share anything with. life is difficult, curveballs hit all the time. in fact, i am dealing with one right now and it is shaking my world up pretty good. even if it changes my career path a lot, i know that the friends and family i have met will be with me every step of the way. for that, i am very grateful. https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 a quote from week 9 also resonates with the idea of being vulnerable. “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way, someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship. this requires a great deal of humility. not only is it important to walk together with somebody, but one must also learn how to be accompanied to participate in the reciprocity of accompaniment.”(“teaching accompanimenta learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i am much more comfortable when i am the one listening to someone be vulnerable, but i realized the best way to help someone be vulnerable is to open myself up and be vulnerable. i started sharing what is going on in my life more with my best friend robert. we have been making weekly trips to the grotto at night and sharing what we have been struggling with and what has been going well. i cherish these times with robert and i am grateful that i get to spend the next four years with him. i believe that self-reflection is very important for productivity and overall mental health. i do a bad job at self-reflection. i find myself only reflecting when times get tough, not when times are good. i believe that i would benefit from taking a quiet period once a week at the grotto. even if nothing is wrong, forcing myself to debrief at the grotto would be good. i got this idea from week 1 of moreau. “the computer chip maker intel experimented with a “quiet period” of four hours every tuesday, during which three hundred engineers and managers were asked to turn off their email and phones and put up “do not disturb” signs on their office doors in order to make space for ‘thinking time’”(“why dont we slow down our lives” by pico iyler moreau fye week 1). i believe i would be more centered and happy if i took a quiet period at the grotto every week. another way i make myself happy is by doing computer science work. i learned in high school that when i am doing homework that i enjoy, it does not feel like homework. in week four of moreau, i read that “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.”(“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course“ moreau fye week 4). i found this to be very true and it makes me excited to be continuing with computer science at notre dame. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ capstone integration april 24, 2022 the mission statement to a life well lived as my time in the moreau first year experience has drawn to a close, i believe i have attained many important life skills and learned many important life lessons to help me continue the remaining three years of my academic journey. in week 13 we were asked to use these lessons and skills to form a personal mission statement on how we wanted to live out the rest of our lives. mine went as followed: i will strive each day to improve myself and become the best version of myself. success is not defined as being superior to others, but as being superior to your previous self. i will continue to recognize my mistakes and failures, and view them as opportunities for growth and learning. i will treat all people around me with equal respect and will intervene in moments of injustice. all people must be treated with respect as all lives are important and all lives hold value. if i see a situation where another person is being treated unfairly or unjustly, i will put forth my best effort to assist them in overcoming any oppression they may face and eliminating hate. i will seek out an occupation that is both fulfilling to me and helps me to positively impact society. i will have a job where i am challenged and enjoy solving the problems which i may face. i also hope to have a job in which my work adds value to society and can improve the lives of people around me. i will never take the small moments for granted. it is quintessential to live in the present and not overwhelm yourself with the stress or uncertainty of the future. instead, i will focus on the small joys of my everyday life and cherish the memories and laughs i have each day. in my pursuit of happiness and a good life, i will always keep a light heart and an open mindset. life always presents struggles and challenges, but i will always make sure to remember to pay attention to the silver linings and be optimistic for the future. we are only given one life, so i will choose to spend it in good spirits. the first part of my mission statement addresses the importance to continually improve and grow into the best version of yourself. a quote from this semester which relates to this scenario comes from the week 3 material from fr. michael himes, a theologian from boston college in his article titled, “three key questions.” he said, “dissatisfaction (restlessness) is not a bad thing...indeed it’s the best thing about us.” it’s what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing!” ("three key questions" adapted from fr. michael himesmoreau fye week 3). in this quote, fr. himes addresses the importance of never being satisfied with our current states, and using this to drive ourselves forward towards learning and growth. this is something i completely agree with as i believe complacency can be a very dangerous thing. over the next three years, i will make sure to reflect upon my performances in school, as well as my own mental state and my relationships with others. when i am dissatisfied with the state of how things are, i will use this as motivation to make a change so that i become superior to the previous versions of myself. however, i will also recognize that progress and growth are not always an easy thing to achieve. during week 4 of moreau, we were asked to explore a source given to us from the meuro family center for career development. when discussing success, advice was given which said, “as much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order” ("navigating your career journey” moreau fye week 4). using this advice, one goal of mine over the next three years and into the course of my life is to start keeping a journal or log on my feelings of the progress i believe i am making. this way, when i feel unsure about how i am improving myself, i can review the things i have done in the previous weeks to remind myself success isn’t always linear, and i can hold myself accountable for making the changes i want to see in myself. the second section of my mission statement was all about standing up to any injustice i see and making sure i am treating all people with the respect they deserve. throughout the second semester of moreau, one of the most important topics we discussed was how to deal with injustice and what we can do to try and present it. one of my favorite quotes from this semester came from the fr. hesburgh documentary from week 2. in response to a student who was upset about the current political state in the country, fr. hes said, “...then do something about it, it's your country, it's your problem” (“hesburgh” -by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). these words are some that i kept in mind when i was crafting my mission statement and i will ensure i continue to keep them in mind if i am ever faced with a situation where injustice is present. over the course of this semester there have been many materials and quotes which have resonated with me on how to make the world a better place and how to eliminate hate. the first one i would like to share comes from week 11 when we explored echo chambers and how to avoid them. an echo chamber is an environment where information is presented in a close minded fashion where alternate opinions are not allowed. during that week we watched a video from thinknd which shared the words, “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion,” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11) . i believe one of the biggest sources of separation and disrespect comes from lack of perspective and information. for these reasons, in order to ensure i am always respecting others like my mission statement says, i will always keep my mind open to diverse opinions and will evaluate whether or not my information sources are trapping me in an echo chamber. in addition, if i ever notice a situation in which i see someone else refusing to take alternate viewpoints into account, i will move forward in encouraging them to explore more sources and escaping their possible echo chamber. the second part of my mission statement also deals with the idea of standing up for others and helping to eliminate hate in the world. during week 9 of the course we looked at a peice by professor steve refenberg about accompaniment. in his writing he said, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless … this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard,” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). i will work to incorporate these words into my mission statement and into the course of my life as i stand up for the people around me. growing up as a white man in the united states it has been very apparent to me that i possess privilege that many others don’t have. i think a critical aspect to my life is making sure i use this privilege in order to help the less fortunate around me. many people are in situations where they do not have the ability to have a voice or stand up for themselves, and if i ever encounter this situation i will not try and be their voice, but instead i will use my resources to give them the respect and the voice which they deserve. lastly, one thing that is important to me is reducing the amount of hate i see around me. in week 12 we looked at a writing piece from dean g. marcus cole in response to the muder of george floyd. when discussing hate he said, “one thing that each and every one of us can do is to end the cycle of hate by ending the separation that leads to it,” ( “dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). as a part of my mission statement i am going to work towards eliminating any hate in my life and any hate i see around me. to do so i will work towards creating strong bonds with people around me and never discriminating or causing separation. in order to stop hate at its source it is essential to be inclusive towards everyone and recognize that we are all members of the human race even though we may be different from each other. the third section of my mission statement discusses how important it is for me to find a job which is both fulfilling to me and allows me to contribute to society. one of my life role models and most important people in my life is my dad who gave me important advice for our moreau week 5 assignment in was to find an occupation which i thoroughly enjoy and not to worry about the salary which comes along with it (moreau fye week 5). over the next three years i am going to use platforms such as linkedin as well as other notre dame resources to research job opportunities. i am not sure of what direction i want to take my career in but as a part of my mission statement i will work to find the perfect job for me. subsequently, i will also make sure to find a healthy work-life balance. in week 1 of this semester we watched a ted talk from pico lyer about the importance of finding a means to escape the stress of your daily life and focus your energy towards relaxation. in his talk he said, “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). these words inspire me to make sure i am present outside of my work, and in order to better my productivity and quality of my work i will also focus on eliminating stress and finding peace. the last two sections of my mission statement revolve around the idea of leading my life with a light heart and having an appreciation for every day i live. one of the most moving pieces we interacted with this semester came from week 6 from a video from the grotto. in the video a man who is disabled shared how he still has gratitude and appreciation for life. in the video he said, “so as i began just thanking god and being more positive about the things that i had already, i was able to do things more gladly, and with gratitude and joy and hope,” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). these words have helped me to realize that if a man in a far more unfortunate situation than me can still have appreciation for life, then i should always be able to keep a positive and open mindset. whenever i experience hardship or inconvenience during my next 3 years of college i will make sure to take a step back and be grateful for the things i do have. more moving words came from our week 7 material from a ted talk from pope francis. in his talk he said, “...life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, …love is the source and the meaning of life,” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). i will always remember these words in the back of my head in order to maintain an appreciation for life. our time on earth is very short and it is essential to recognize the gift of life and not to be caught up in the bad things or inconveniences we face. i know that if i work to follow this mission statement and keep the lessons i have learned from the moreau course, i will be on my way to leading a life well lived. my last quote from our materials comes from week 10 from an article from the grotto about embracing humanity. the quote said, “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” ("growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). to me this quote means that we must always keep faith as we move forward. in order to lead a life well lived we must recognize the gifts god has given to us and have an appreciation for all things and all people we encounter. week 8integration 3 moreau first year experience week 8integration 3 passion and connection– danuta’s life today we are here to honor the life that was . for those who knew her, you know her view on life often left her confused, or anxious. she had endless things she wanted to do, and she wanted to leave this plane knowing that she didn’t waste any time living the best life she could. that meant that she made as many successes as she did mistakes. she was incredibly aware that “it is impossible to have a complete and honest human story, if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes.” ("hesburgh" , produced by jerry barca and christine o’malleymoreau week two). although this didn’t mean she didn’t dwell. from a young age, danuta felt big feelings. she didn’t feel happy, she felt overjoyed. she would get mad, she would get enraged. so when she made a mistake, he wouldn’t get sad; she would be devastated. it wasn’t because she was overly dramatic, though she often joked that her dramatics made her destined for hollywood. no, it was because she was raised to be passionate–about everything. her passion went beyond the fleeting moments of life. she was determined to believe that everything happened for a reason. “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture.” ( why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyermoreau week 1). stepping back was hard for danuta at first. it required her to let go of some of the emotions that she held, in order to find peace within her place in life. the way she did that was rather simple–she looked to those she loved. danuta had a habit of seeking out friends or family whenever she needed them. i’m sure many of you here today can attest to the fact that there were days danuta appeared at the front of your door. whether she was there to spill out all of her feelings or not, you knew you were doing something important. you knew that she needed you. one of the things she valued most in life were the people that surrounded her. all of them shaped her into the strong, outgoing person she was and it was imperative to her that they knew how special they were. one of danuta’s best friends kacper once told her how she “helped the energy of the group be whatever it needed to be” (discernment activitymoreau week 5). he was referencing a friend’s birthday party, which https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ probably means danuta was dragging people to the dance floor and cracking jokes left and right, but he hit the nail right on the head. danuta always wanted to uplift her friends to share in their joy. it was never an option to let someone drown into negative thoughts when she had the ability to help. in danuta’s eyes, the growth of one meant the growth of all that surrounded them. that’s why at times danuta would get sucked into her own head. she was aware that “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha eurichmoreau week 6). danuta wanted to know where she was in life, because boy did she love working with people. she came alive when she got to collaborate with others and loved every second of work that connected her with someone else. that’s how she saw the world. she believed the world is a web of human connection that we should honor– not sever. her advocacy for the rights she believed in all came from her hope that we can all see how similar we are. we can think of his holiness pope francis’ words when he states, “through the darkness of today's conflicts, each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around.” (his holiness pope francis: why the only future worth building includes everyone | ted talk, by his holiness pope francismoreau week 7). danuta believed that everyone had the ability to become great. no matter how often doubt encroached on her future plans, she never let go of the knowledge that time is everything and that the light will come. she was a bright light, and she knew that everyone here today was too. there was never a question if danuta was moving towards something. given how much passion she had, it was always being put to use. danuta’s passion was the arts. she would dance, act, direct, anything she could to release her emotions in a way that could touch those around her. however, when she first started, danuta knew she wasn’t amazing at it. but no part of her felt like giving up. the scars on her knees were all evidence of her persistence. if she fell off her bike, she got right back on. if her efforts didn’t provide the result she wanted, she tried again. it may have seemed as though she was in a rush to be the best, but all she was doing was a result of knowing that “it’s not a one-step process.” (navigating you career journey by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau week 4). danuta was never one to let up. she wanted to do what she wanted to do and there was no one who could stop her. danuta would search far and wide to find what makes her happy, because she knew that there must be something. fitting into https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ the box of expectations was a struggle for her at times–until she let it go. she let go of what she was told would make her happy and thought to herself, “well what do i want?”. being that it’s a hefty question i can’t say she got a straight answer. but what can be said is that danuta gave herself the chance to find out. fr. michael himes once said, “finally, no one but you can say this is my joy. you must discover this for yourself!” ( three key questions adapted from fr. michael himes moreau week 3). danuta had so much to discover.there so many things left for her to find, and declare as her joy–since you know she would. danuta let the world know what she loved. her passions, her people, even her knick-knacks from her favorite shows. her love will be missed. but do not let her connection to fade as you continue on living. she knew everyone was destined for greatness. so let us show her how right she was and live on for her. danuta is not one we will forget. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40288/files/471202/download?download_frd=1 moreau fye integration 3 be the light moreau first year experience professor wagner 4 march 2022 be the light maddy was a sweet girl. while her time on this earth was short-lived, there is no doubt that she tried to live it to the fullest. she, like many others, made mistakes but tried her best to be a good person and do the right thing. oftentimes, she put others before herself, hoping to please them rather than be happy herself. if she was tired, she’d still go out of her way to make a friend smile. i remember talking to maddy about this, recommending that she put herself first and take time to be alone. maddy insisted that she was fine, but i knew she wasn’t. in a day and age where people can be contacted anytime, either in person, over a phone call, or through email, one barely finds time for themself, especially when the other hours of the day are consumed with homework. i told her to read pico iyer's “why we need to slow down our lives,” as it dealt with finding the time to rest, even if we did not consider ourselves worthy of that rest. one quote that stood out to maddy was the idea that “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). maddy, as an only child, always believed that she had to surround herself with people to make up for the lack of siblings. it was in her alone time, however, that she was able to truly be herself, without the worry of expressing her genuine thoughts or feelings. she enjoyed the calm that came with being alone, and how her ideas were fluid and natural. after reading pico iyer’s article, maddy started taking time for herself, even if it was just a ten-minute walk around campus. i could tell she was making an effort to distance herself from the stress of everyday life. still, whenever a friend needed her, she was always there, even if it interrupted her alone time. i remember one specific time she was exhausted from a hard week at school, but her friend called her crying because her boyfriend had broken up with her. maddy spent the whole weekend there for her friend, consoling her and helping her work through the emotions, despite how tired maddy was herself. knowing that it was okay to put herself first was something she ultimately had to work on. i know she was trying her best to do this, as she recently began taking friday nights to just relax and take care of herself. she would wash her hair and face, buy a tub of ice cream, and just watch a movie, putting away all of her homework and getting off social media. this helped center her and made her even brighter than she was before. there was no doubt that maddy was there for others. it seems like this was just an inherent part of her. she often told me that she tried to act as father ted hesburgh would after watching the hesburgh movie, viewing people as purely human, and as brothers and sisters under god. she struggled with this sometimes, either getting upset over her roommate’s uncleanliness or making initial judgments about people before she even got the chance to know them. this did not define her, though. no, she tried to be the light for others, one that they could https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ come to without fear of getting burnt or turned away. she didn't just extend her hand to her friends but also reached out to those she didn't know. one time, as maddy was on her way to class, she saw a girl slip on an icy sidewalk. she immediately rushed over to help the girl get up. maddy was not perfect, but she truly tried to act under the influence of father hesburgh, living her life asking not what she could do for herself, but rather what she could do for others. father hesburgh was her inspiration for a life well-lived, embodying notre dame’s central beliefs, and living his life as a force for good. like father hesburgh, she cherished the years she had on this earth, and “spent time with the people [she] loved most in this life” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). she worked on showing kindness to those around her by doing the small things, like holding the door for a stranger, or baking treats for her friends. she told me before she passed that she also wanted to start getting involved with volunteering somewhere around campus, although she did not know exactly where to go. i believe this was because maddy had listened to a ted talk by his holiness pope francis. in this ted talk, his holiness pope francis explained how it is everyone’s responsibility to be tender to one another and be sensitive to the needs of others. maddy tried to listen to his advice and work towards building an environment that was more inclusive for everyone. whenever she encountered those who were struggling to make ends meet or were being treated as less than human, she too, like pope francis, found herself questioning, “why them and not me” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis, ted conferences moreau fye week seven). specifically, she was moved by the fact that her ancestors were persecuted in cuba and forced to leave their home country. luckily, kind people had taken them into their jurisdiction and helped find them a home in puerto rico, where many of them still live to this day. it was because of this that she tried to be kind to everyone and take them into her jurisdiction, even if she did not know them that well. she hoped to be like the individuals who helped her family, and like pope francis, so that she could build a better future that included everyone in it. she defined a life well-lived as actively working towards building community with others, advocating for harmony and peace among people of different races, religions, and cultures. while it may have seemed that maddy had an easy life, this was not entirely true. she was blessed in many ways, and she knew that. she had parents who loved her, a roof over her head, the opportunity to attend one of the best colleges in the country, and had amazing friends. maddy struggled with her mental health, however, often getting stuck inside her head. she would fixate on an issue and then proceed to stress over it. she suffered from trichotillomania, a hair-pulling disorder that worsened when her stress levels rose and would cause her to pick at her eyebrows until they were bare. she had to learn coping mechanisms to curve the urge to pull, but even those could not lessen the stress she felt. she constantly wondered why she had this problem, blaming herself and only inflicting more emotional pain upon herself. she told me one time that she read an article by tasha eurich that explained the importance of avoiding asking “why” questions because of the “the negative impact it can have on our overall mental health” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ conferences moreau fye week six). after reading this, she instead began to ask “what can i do in this moment,” instead of “why has this happened to me.” this helped change her outlook on negative situations, most of the time, although she occasionally struggled with it from time to time. i remember her telling me that she planned to focus on the present more instead of worrying about the past or future, taking each day at a time and finding one good thing in that day, even if it was tough or did not go entirely her way. she also planned to start visiting the grotto or chapel in her dorm once a week to step away and ask god for strength. maddy placed a lot of her identity in her grades. she tried her best to accept the idea that grades don’t define her, but she still struggled to accept when a grade was not what she wanted. it wasn’t that she felt the need to get straight a’s, but was rather upset when she studied hard for an exam and it did not go her way. she found inspiration, however, in sister alethia, a nun who serves as a reminder that because of the bad we may encounter in our lives, we can appreciate the good so much more. while college may have been hard for maddy, all of the darkness, the struggling, made her appreciate the friendships and relationships she had so much more. she tried to follow sister alethia’s idea that “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). in her last few months, maddy tried to implement this outlook into her daily life. she would take time each day to appreciate what she had done, instead of getting angry over something she had not. when there was a sunny day in south bend during the winter, she would take time to appreciate its warmth, rather than getting angry over the permacloud. she tried to find joy in the small things, and rather than focusing primarily on the large goal, she enjoyed the small victories that each moment provided. for example, whenever she took an organic chemistry exam, she applauded herself for studying as hard as she could and trying her best to learn the material. if the grade was not what she wanted, she was disappointed, but she knew that she had done all she could. she would try to move forward by reminding herself that it is not her grades that define her, but rather her actions towards others. maddy was described by others as kind, good-hearted, and vivacious. everyone seemed to have a set idea about her. however, she never really knew who she was. she enjoyed a variety of things, such as reading and baking, but never truly knew what she wanted to do with her life. she knew that she wanted to go into the medical field, but all of her strengths resided in the humanities and writing. the meruelo family center for career development’s “navigating your career journey” helped remind her that she did not need to know everything, as choosing a career is not a linear path. there are times of second-guessing and discernment, but there is also nothing wrong with that. it is through this process that one is able to learn more about themselves. the article mentioned that “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters,” and that the only way to do that is to “just get out and experience life” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). maddy tried to implement this advice into her everyday life by trying to find joy in her learning, especially in subjects like biology and organic chemistry. she would try to focus on https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ the interesting aspects of the subjects rather than simply memorizing them for an exam. this helped her find meaning among the hardships she faced in these classes, and continue pushing forward despite how difficult it became. maddy once had a conversation with her mother following the week five discernment conversation activity conversation guide. when she asked her mother when she was in her zone, or most “herself,” her mother recalled a basketball game maddy had played in fifth grade. she told maddy that she remembered that she “would just keep fighting and pushing through it for [herself] and [the] team, and [she] was very tenacious” (“week five discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). her mom kept reiterating that she fought through things that weren’t easy and that when she fell, she picked herself up. maddy truly was a fighter, choosing to push on instead of giving up in the face of adversity. just as she got up in that basketball game, she continued to get up when she was knocked down in life. entering college was difficult for maddy, and she found herself not feeling smart or worthy enough after doing subpar on one of her chemistry exams. while she may have shed some tears, she did not let this define her. instead, she kept studying, and wound up ending with a b+ in the class. while that may not be a grade everyone is happy with, maddy was proud of herself for fighting through, even when it became tough. maddy may have been taken from this world too soon, but i think she truly did live a life worth living. she tried to be a light amongst the darkness for others, even when she was struggling. so, as we leave here today, i encourage you too to be the light for others to follow, to go out of your way for others, and to find what makes you smile. live a life worth living, and don’t be afraid to test the waters. maddy would have wanted you to do so. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit integration 3 integration 3 (eulogy) the life of we are gathered here today to celebrate the life of . let us all take a moment to slow down and think about the important things in life. as pico iyer once said, “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week one). the practice of slowing down and self reflecting may be useful to us all in reducing stress and lowering blood pressure and may perhaps delay our own inevitable funerals, especially if you suffer from hypertension. taking a moment to slow down was something lucy did often in order to destress and see things from a different and clearer perspective. seeing things from a different perspective can help us to see what is really important in life and what our priorities are. understanding one’s priorities in life, may lead to a better and less stressful life and when we are less stressed we can help reduce the stress of those around us. furthermore, lucy had a long and well lived life. this may lead us all to wonder, what a life well lived is. is it how many awards we received, the type of car we drove, and how much money we made, or is it how we connect to and help those around us. in a ted talk, pope francis said “we don’t think about it often, but everything is connected, and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). a good life is not measured in how longer or short it may be, but rather in the relationships we build with those around us. relationships are very important to the well being of a community and of the world because everything is connected. we are all connected to each other and should try to help out each other when we can. also, getting to know new people and learning about their backgrounds is an important part of developing relationships. lucy had developed close friendships with many people throughout her life and was always happy to meet new people and learn about their life journeys. lucy also put a lot of careful thought into discerning the path for her life. she thought about questions such as what she values in life and what issues are important to her (moreau fye week five). asking such questions can help us determine what we want to do with our lives and how we want to choose a career in which we can use our abilities to best serve others. helping others was an important part of lucy's life and she chose a profession in which she could use her skill, abilities, and what she had learned throughout life to help others. lucy also discerned her path in life by asking herself, what brings her joy, what is she good at, and how can she help those in her community. she was also continually searching for how she can help others. fr. micheal himes once said, “it’s [restlessness] https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing! ” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three). lucy never stopped learning and growing through her life and she was always expanding her horizons. furthermore, although she was a chemical engineering major in college, she used this knowledge to help people in other ways than just through engineering. “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). the stories of our lives do not boil down to one thing or one event. we may take many different paths throughout our lifetimes and all of them make us who we are, but we also change throughout lifes. people may change some of their careers, passions, and hobbies throughout their lives. lucy did take some different paths throughout her life but also had some commitments and passions that remained with her throughout her life. lucy faced some struggles in life but she always focused on the good things in her life instead of what she did not have. she was also able to see the potential for good in every situation. even when she faced obstacles and her personal and professional lives, she still tried to stay positive and look for and acknowledge the good things in her life. she would ask “what” questions instead of “why” questions. “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). being introspective is not always a good thing, but when done properly it can give you greater insight, a clearer sense of purpose, and greater well-being, self-acceptance, and happiness. these are all important parts of a life well lived. also, a well lived life can inspire others to have a well lived life and to help those around them. fr. hesburgh inspired others because he “had an extraordinary ability to reach across lines” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). listening to other people’s opinions and finding common ground is an important skill. lucy also made a point to listen to other people’s opinions and to find common ground. she was able to talk to people of all different backgrounds. overall lucy had a well lived life, but now it is over and done with. hopefully we can all learn something from lucy’s life and the attitude she had throughout life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884/download?download_frd=1 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884/download?download_frd=1 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjrb9oweme%2fsut3xmeh67aairvnrwjdvfgf9okc5aiwic%2f1os18%2bznqdd1lvcmsrdpd%2ff%2b%2fo09jda2vi94fzam89ua%2bwi1nbjepvpaqkes4vemshotjfqu0fnhzlf%2fgav5mopmw6becatqzjpkursuihlagvdi%2bhfih4jqlzyuetccye0ku8t8swgyvbzs%2fvb68tyq5x6nxiaktqhuurow90c9dd3%2fgxqb3uksodlyztb53iw6n4yhrz0f9dl8uxzy3d1l%2bw4mqd0qs%2bo6uggvwjdwqjrjsfyoodh2lfa49vth%2b06bwzj9jvtmsfwmsjqir9jxclh6szcct5twj5n12w8tfz82wrqsicaphlrrqo3abcm%2b6gl8p639kb%2b6ta5khonmfscrsehf9h3spxafdfi17brjf9ssiu9cakpclfezovqkw%2bxtilpdduhf1h5ervybs%2fhnbu%2f5o5kpo5x3ixs0lbhv1jhztiy%2b3dpqp4%2faud9pm82vz%2f99t%2fgc%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=ayxncchfoetr1vzvaitknzoehzzkrj5h5y90b3apcl3cloirl3dhqd4gk%2f2dnpiyqtlilojybbd1rcwdyex1coz4suglgtpg6crrd9bvd3xsq%2fnbgqy%2f%2foqnbvnqmttwl3r9uyyumkbawscc7uakefzmnysenbcjz78exc9%2fwka4vesb0vakvaiwgwnpd%2bytiow6ypfc3tzwnwjr99fvjqoiuifs7fzbix%2f%2bwhkrlndar2rkhg%2fsntexxye1frooiadtbqv8t0oavxnbnd3xrvfttaqwsn9hgm0vvwgimlxup%2bwys1lvqmd15rjoeftsko9fafuzvq4hahig3%2by5kq%3d%3d moreau 04 march 2022 integration three oh while this pains me to write, i have to. has indeed passed but he didn’t die in vain, and i’m here to explain. throughout his life, ever since he was a little child, he has been adventurous and tenacious. these are characteristics that he not only carried with him up until his death, but he used his traits to make change throughout others’ lives as well. he not only carried his own characteristics and ideas with him, but he also learned from very wise people as well. one of his favorite people to listen and learn from was notre dame’s father hesburgh. and he also lived by his hesburgh quote, “in my faith, you learn there’s meaning in suffering, but to truly understand that you have to, first, suffer yourself.” but it wasn’t just hesburgh’s words that he liked to follow, he liked the ideals that hesburgh lived by. such as living not only for himself, but to sacrifice for others as well. believed that life wasn’t enjoyable if he saw others in pain, and he made it his personal mission to always help anyone he was capable of helping. he sort of wanted to live like the “good samaritan.” i know you all know that story. he didn’t just want to be a “good samaritan” because it only made him feel good though, he did it because he believed in one of pope francis’ main missions. and that is to help others because without the hope that others will be helped when in need, then the world is doomed. tyson fought to keep that hope alive, and he believed it all the way up until his death. i think what made so unique was that he was unlike any other person on this earth. he understood the importance of spirituality and happiness. he knew how to not only live with but find and hold on to long term satisfaction. tyson found out from a young age that material things do not matter at all. in fact, we as humans put too much worth and power over these objects. tyson saw what material things did to certain people, and how it changed them and made them do unspeakable things. he knew he didn’t want this to be him, but he wanted to share his message to ensure others around him didn’t find themselves going into a downward spiral. this, i believe, was tyson’s greatest achievement in life. he didn’t let the unimportant things take control of him. he didn’t want to end up like he saw many others, and at the end of the day he enjoyed his life and was comfortable with what he had. he never dwelled over what he didn’t have or feigned for what others had. now that i think about it, was a very introspective person, but also insightful as well. i believe that he learned the importance of the combination of both. he knew that it was impossible to truly understand yourself if you had insight but lacked introspection and vice versa. in fact, here is one of his quotes about the topic, “it is important, as people grow, to learn how to understand yourself. and while that might seem easy to do it is not at all. emotions and feelings are a part of everyone’s lives and many people go their entire lives without learning how to control them. internal control truly is a superpower that everyone can learn, but they have to have it brought to their attention in order for them to become aware of it.” this is a great example of his demeanor and his level of understanding within himself. he didn’t let little things or big things make him lose control. he always had full control of his emotions and mind, and no one could ever throw him off mentally. throughout his life he was pushed mentally, from going to top schools his whole life such as notre dame to then playing collegiate level football at notre dame as well. throughout tyson’s whole life he stayed under control, a trait that many people go through their entire lives lacking. tyson picked this up at a young age because he knew the importance of holding on to what he had. now what do i mena by this? i am implying that he knew people would try to get under his skin to possibly make him do something he regretted later. and he never lost that control, no matter how angry or how emotional he became. as i am wrapping up, i want to leave you with something would want you all to know. and that is the importance of slowing down your lives. . one of tyson’s favorite people mahatma ghandi lived by this rule. even ghandi knew the importance of having control of your time and not letting time control you. throughout your day meditate and make time for yourself, do not let this world consume you with its antics and demands. this is the key to what tyson understood, that sometimes it is okay to “go nowhere.” going nowhere is the epitome of having a grasp on your own time. now this does not mean stay stagnant, but always have time allocated towards yourself. do not rush anything throughout life because then you’ll miss the most important parts. remember, the end goal is not what makes memories, it is the journey along the way. always remember to cherish the people you meet and never live life going through the motions. you must live with a purpose, walk with a purpose, and most importantly, die with a purpose. capstone integration it is the mission of to live a life of learning and make the world better for someone else. he would like to be the person that people can trust and rely on. some most influential people have been his teachers and coaches throughout his life. through them, he has learned patience, how to compartmentalize, and most importantly the rewards of effort. however, the most influential person has been his grandmother as she has taught him how contagious happiness can be through another’s, and kindness and love. seeing someone who can face anything with positivity is truly inspiring. it is people like this along with others that allow hugh to be the role of a friend, family member, and student. through this role of friend and family member hugh strives to show that he can be trusted and relighted upon in any situation. more importantly, he works to be a source of joy in the lives of others. as a student, he keeps an open mind knowing that there will always be more to learn about a topic a person, or a culture. he uses this role all that he can so that one day he can fulfill the role of engineer. as an engineer, he hopes to fulfill the mission of being able to give others the option to feel secure. he has learned that effort alone isn’t enough and how one affects the lives of others is subjective. but, has he gained the most joy when helping another he hopes that through engineering prosthetics he can provide people with the option for another way to feel secure in their body and abilities the most important thing to hugh is a positive impact on those around him, in other words, hugh has two goals, one is to live a life of growth, and the other is to make a positive impact on the things around him. hugh believed he could complete that second goal by becoming a mechanical engineer. he thought that through that position he could create something that can only be seen as good. this was a hard task as pico lyer once said “the one thing technology doesn’t provide us with is a sense of how to make the best use of technology” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week one) he spent the end of his high school career and most of his college career working on a program that would help those with disabilities connect to the world around them, whether it's driving a wheelchair or typing on a computer. he put all his effort into creating something that will not only allow people to use technology but to feel in control and independent within their lives again. he worked tirelessly driving 2 hours every day over the summer to work on it in a lab at stony brook university. despite the effort, hugh exhibited to reach his goals, it would not be incorrect to say that hugh experienced failure time and time again. while working on the project, playing sports, and even in academics. hugh never shied away from failure and took every failure as a growth opportunity. in the movie hesburgh, it is said that “one doesn’t speak of human failures as well as human success” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). hugh seemed to speak more of his failures than of his successes. he believed that discussing his failures like not making his high school basketball team or not being able to finish his project he felt talking about it allowed him to learn and move forward. when he was in danger of failing his calc ii class in his first semester at notre dame he talked about this failure with his professor and his parents. because he talked about his failure, he was able to plan with those he discussed his failure with and create a plan to try again. however, you don’t always get to try again. when hugh didn’t make the basketball team and discussed his failure with friends, they convinced him to try wrestling ich he continued throughout college. hugh found that sharing failure allowed him to create connections, learn and discover new things. nevertheless, it was the pursuit of his goal to create something good for others and his growth through failures that is a part large part of the engineering that made hugh become a mechanical engineer. when reading about how one should choose a career path, hugh considered the question: “is this vocation / this role / this profession / this way of life that you are considering something you are good at? [...] this can only be determined by other people” (“three key questions” by fr. michel himes moreau fye week three). hugh did not believe this at all. when hugh chose to go to notre dame he did so, in the belief that notre dame will provide him with the lessons and experiences required to be the person he wanted to be. he believed that he could learn to be good at anything. when he started wrestling a coach told him not to do leg moves in matches or practice because he wasn’t good at it and was better with other moves. however, because he pushed on anyway and it allowed him to win matches that he would never have with the limited skillset his coach wanted him to focus on. another quote hugh considered was, “you have to know yourself first— your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips)— before you can make effective career choices (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career developmentmoreau fye week four). hugh new above all valued effort, kindness, and friendship, and he was interested in learning how things worked. however, going into college after a pandemic he felt as though he didn’t truly know his personality and he didn’t have any skills. nevertheless, he knew that through effort and the help of others he could develop the skills necessary to be a mechanical engineer and do something that aligned with his values. in an interview with one of hugh’s closest friends, hugh inquired, “what do you think i most value and desire in life?” hugh’s friend responded that hugh valued “meaningful, long-lasted connections and the ability to make a positive impact in the lives of others” (“week five discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). hugh desired more than anything else to be a source of good and joy to others. his desire to be good for others didn’t come without struggle. he thought often about the question. “if god is good, why does he allow suffering...?” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye week six). even though his greatest desire was to be a source of the good he knew that not everyone would think of him that way and he could even become a source of suffering. but, something that hugh’s uncle once said is that one can only appreciate and truly experience joy and happiness if they have also experienced sadness. the things and the people that others appreciate in life are those that can offer them happiness or remedy their sorrow. hugh understood that he was living a life well-lived if someone smiled while he was around, and even if the memory or reminder of this led to some form of happiness. as stated by pope francis, “life is not time merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week seven.) these interactions with the people both here and not made hugh’s life well-lived —to have a good group of friends that mutually cared for one another and enjoyed the time they had together. it is also the bad interactions with those who were strangers, or even bullies because every interaction provided the opportunity to learn and to grow. hugh would want to be remembered due to the connections and growth experienced by others because of him. hugh will lead a life well-lived if he had an impact on the lives around him. he chose to become a mechanical engineer to give people options that would place positivity in their lives. hugh acknowledges that he couldn’t solve the world’s problems because the world doesn’t have problems, individuals do. professor steve reisenberg’s story supports this when he states. “i wept, partly from the illness, but mostly out of frustration at how little the vision of me sick in bed resembled the one in my head of an autonomous me helping the needy them. that equation had been flipped.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reisenberg moreau fye week nine.) this story and quote were interesting to me as i recently had to watch adichie’s “danger of a single story” for a paper in another class. this is because the problem and effects of a problem that is preconceived notions appear to be the same. throughout the text, the author states that accompaniment allows one to learn and get rid of this ignorance but how might people be able to grow up without these preconceived notions. this story shows how people can fall into accompaniment and how trying to take control to “help” is not helpful. the aspect of this quote i found particularly interesting was that it took the person who felt almost better than to be made much weaker than those they sought to help to realize that they never really needed it moreover, there is no guarantee that anyone will ever need or want the things hugh creates. however, hugh knows that just through kindness he still may be able to make someone's world better. in an article by jacob walsh, it was stated that “'god doesn’t make shit.' he told me that i could not convince myself that god loved me. 'you can ask him to show you, though. and you can pay attention to the relationships where you know you’re loved.'” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walshmoreau fye week ten). just by the little act of loving another as a friend or as a family, you're giving them the option to find joys in their life just as the design of different prosthetics can give those with certain disabilities the ability to regain control. it is this aspect that hugh has learned from notre dame thus far. that even if he fails to “objectively help” as long as the option is there for another when they want or need it he made someone’s world better. this is not the only change notre dame has made in hugh and there will be more. through the challenging courses and new friends, hugh realized there are different ways of growth than just becoming more responsible or more knowledgeable. there is a growth in maturity and security. hugh used to believe that the more he knew and the better he could do then the better person he was. but sometimes you don’t have to know everything. in a story within hidden brain media it is stated that “you know, you’ve already read the newspaper. you’ve already listened to all the radio. what possibly more could you be getting from this?” (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain mediamoreau fye week eleven). hugh realized you can’t learn everything there is to know. however, if you know what’s relevant and leave yourself open to change then you will be able to tackle any situation. hugh is still learning how to do that, as there are situations where he feels unequipped ignorant, and unjust to try to tackle. hugh wants to make someone’s world better and found a path to do that with disabilities and general friendships but what about the more prevalent problems like race. dean g. marcus stated, “we will return fathers and mothers to their sons and daughters, particularly when their only “crime” was to be born the wrong color.” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) through heavy contemplation of this topic, hugh realized that there are some problems an individual cannot fully solve. however, through educating himself, treating everyone with respect, kindness equality, and supporting the efforts to disband such issues then maybe people may not feel like criminals for the color of their skin, at least not around him. this doesn’t feel like enough for such a large issue and there are many other issues where anyone can certainly do more. however, if one takes their passions and uses them in the best ways they can and treat everything and everyone else with the respect and kindness they deserve then anyone can make the world a little bit better. in conclusion, hugh’s mission is consistently to learn and to be a positive force in the world. hugh will fail, hugh will do the wrong thing and there will always be more hugh could have done or can do. however, if every setback and if every failure is learned from then hugh will be the person he wants to be. this is completely how hugh wants to live his life. others can see this process through every effort hugh makes especially in his reaction to any failure. these failures are what make the mission most difficult but are required for it to be successful, and thanks to notre dame hugh has learned there is not one path he can take to achieve this as long as his failure doesn’t lead him to give up. the only true failure leads him to give up. redmond taylor kelly moreau first year experience 4/27/22 faith & heart: fueling the pursuit of a holistic existence my mission in life is to be an engaged community member with a passion for serving those on the margins. since i was a child i have long dreamt of one day attending the university of notre dame which i believed was the best first step towards pursuing my mission. i contributed copious amounts of time and endless effort to not only achieve this goal but to also succeed during my freshman year here. for instance, this past semester i took organic chemistry. this course is known as one of the toughest classes in college. regardless, i had to learn to give up going out with my friends on some weekends in order to study. this is a study habit i will keep with me for the rest of my three years whenever i have a tough exam for a difficult course. as the well-known notre dame icon father hesburgh once said, “whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living.” (“hesburgh” by fr. theodore hesburgh moreau fye week two) this is a belief i have carried with me and will continue to do so in my future career and family life allowing me to follow out my calling. coming from a family of faith with strong work ethics, my parents have instilled in me similar values. as my lifelong friend aidan told me in a recent conversation, i had one of the best work ethics he had ever seen as he highlighted that i always passionately contributed 110% to projects (“moreau conversation” by moreau fye week five). for instance, growing up i participated in the sleep out every year where i reached out to everyone i knew and raised money for homeless teens by sleeping out in the cold for a night. i set the highest fundraising goal every year and did everything possible such as knocking on neighbors doors to achieve that goal which i did every year. my parents have always emphasized the importance of using religion as a guide to help shape me into a well-rounded, thoughtful human being. with this guidance i know i will be able to make the most out of my time here at notre dame to become involved with the community and support it through volunteering by engaging with the local people of south bend. i believe the best way to go about this will be to become involved with the center for social concerns as they are deeply involved with those in need in the community. specifically within the center for social concerns i hope to participate in the international summer service learning program next year so i can travel overseas and help first-person those seriously marginalized in developing countries. naturally, notre dame is well known for its strong community and faith connection. after completing my first year at this marvelous institution i can verify this understanding is true. one example that verified my belief was when i had the privilege of working with campus ministries director, fr. pete. when i learned i wouldn’t receive a dorm next year as a gateway, i went to fr. pete to see what could be done. we discussed several options but he also made me pray with him. at first i was unsure of how praying with fr. pete would accomplish anything, but when we did that provided me with the calmness and clarity to reassess the housing situation and come away with a positive outlook. with this, i truly am in the best position to continue pursuing a life well-lived given that “i believe my education from notre dame that will shape both my heart and mind will propel me to succeed and not forget my true calling to serve others, especially those on the margins.” (“personal mission statement” by moreau fye week thirteen) additionally, coming to notre dame i have been exposed to a variety of new perspectives and viewpoints. one example of this i can think of is my good friend bridget. bridget is also a gateway but comes from a very different background as she hold concservative views and has grown up in a republican oriented community. before knowing bridget i always kept my distance as i hold more neutral views coming from a liberal state such as vermont. however, after talking to bridget we realized we actually had a lot in common which led us to become great friends. now whenever a big political move has taken place in d.c. i always go to bridget to get her perspective and give her my own. more often than not one or both of our initial perspectives switches after talking to each other. this exposure has allowed me to develop my own set of values which helped to shape my mission statement. notre dame’s own dr. blaschko said it best, “we should be intentional about the information we expose ourselves to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven) there is no doubt in my mind that notre dame is the best place for this intelligent conversation and development. one way i can go about this is to attend the speaker series put out by the center for social concerns. they host speakers from a variety of backgrounds that are all doing work that is in service to others which is exactly what i am passionate about. through these speakers i can learn more about the topic of service and hopefully, specifically, homelessness. college has not only helped to shape my mission statement but it has also exposed me to many realizations in which of the ways i can best serve those on the margins. an important realization i was able to draw from fr. gustavo gutiérrez in professor steve reifenberg’s book was, “‘solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless,’ he said at the workshop. ‘this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have voice and will be heard.’” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg [fr. gustavo gutiérrez] moreau fye week nine) this point is crucial because instead of assuming what those who are struggling want or need, we must go to the source of the issue to best address the issue. with this newfound knowledge, i will make sure to go out into the south bend community and learn or verify their needs so i can best serve them. i plan to serve people over the next three years in the south bend community who are homeless and don’t have a seedy job. similarly, the wonderful fr. greg boyle emphasized this point by highlighting how crucial it is to join hands with those struggling in the community rather than send support from afar. a sense of togetherness is so important in order to truly help. this can be accomplished by actively engaging with these people firsthand by going out into the community. one way i can go about this is to get involved with the hope ministries in south bend. they are a homeless shelter where i can stop by and talk with folks who are trying to get back on their feet and find a steady home. as fr. boyle articulated, “alone, they didn’t have much, but together, they had a potful of plenty.” (“tattoos on the heart” by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven) furthermore, the final major realization i came to this semester that will best help me to follow my mission in serving the vulnerable was expressed by pico iyer. as he stated, “‘half the confusion in the world comes from not knowing how little we need.’” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) here, this perspective from iyer allowed me to understand why a big theme of my mission statement is dedicated to providing my service and resources to others. i have been lucky enough to be born into a family that has supported me both emotionally and financially my entire life. i well know this is not the case for much of the world and this theme is reflective even in south bend. by using the skills and resources i have been given i can begin my own program to provide assistance to those who truly don’t have basic life necessities or join notre dame’s catholic relief services club. this club will educate me on how i can best serve those living in poverty. looking to the future, there are many steps to take, in regard to living out my mission in my career. as notre dame’s career center pointed out, “this reinforces the need to consider all four aspects values, interests, personality, and skills when making a career decision.” (“navigating your career journey” by nd center for career development moreau fye week four) this is an excellent point as i will need to consider a variety of aspects including my mission in order to decide on and follow my future career path. one club i could join at notre dame to help me with this decision is the students consulting for nonprofit organizations club. this club is centered around advising and spending time with nonprofits to assess where the most help can be provided to those in need. this very much aligns with my mission and could help me to discover a career in the nonprofit sector which would allow me to dedicate myself to serving those in need. although it is important to reflect on this point made by fr. michael himes, “this joy may lead you in many, many directions, and it may lead you to further questions.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three) the joy of helping those in need and discovering my career path may lead me into a different career with a different mission. it is critical to keep an open mind and be prepared for whichever way god might guide me. regardless of my future career, god will always be at the forefront of guiding me along my destined path and helping me pursue a well-lived life. even at times when my path does not appear clear i know i must always rely on god. this goes the same for when tough times occur. the question may be asked, “if god is good, why does he allow suffering in my life?” (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six) i realize that at many times it feels as if god has abandoned me, but i always come out of these obstacles and reflect on the strength these difficulties provided me. for instance, during the height of the covid-19 pandemic during the end of my junior year of high school i struggled with not being able to see friends and missing out on my high school sports season. with this struggle i often questioned my faith in god, which only increased when i wasn’t able to attend mass. however, after praying on these difficulties i realized how important it is to rely on god. this helped to ground me and significantly shifted my perspective on the pandemic isolation to a positive one as i was able to become closer with my family. it is important to realize that god is always there supporting us even when it doesn’t appear that way. jacob walsh said it well in his article, “‘you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you.’” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week ten) god will show himself and provide answers if i am ever in question or doubt reading my mission. aside from my mission statement, i believe in order to truly live a well-lived life, family is at the center of it all. i will always be there to help others and strengthen my community, but my family will come first as i hope to one day raise kids that have their own strong values. dean of notre dame’s law school, g. marcus cole, told a story of a racial discrimation encounter where he and his sons were threatened by violence. as he reflected, “at that moment, i remember thinking that the most important thing i could do for my sons was to survive the encounter.” (“'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.'” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve) although i have never encountered racial discrimination towards myself, this is the same mindset i hope to hold for my children as their wellbeing and success should be put before my own if threatened. in terms of being away from my family over the next three years i want to make sure that i continue to keep a strong connection with my parents. i plan to maintain this bond by calling my mom and dad every weekend, this is a habit i have kept over my first year and i will certainly keep it. at the end of it all i hope one day my family can look back and exclaim, “i encourage you all to live like liam did and to always embody his values.” (“a calling to serve the vulnerable eulogy” by moreau fye week eight) while it is impossible to know what the future holds, i believe i have best set myself up to follow along the path that god has so far guided me on empowering me to pursue a life well-lived serving those around me. integration 3 mr. bryan reaume fys 10102 4 march 2022 defining a life well lived thank you all for gathering here today to celebrate the memory and the life of caleb quick. he was a real upstanding member of society and one who will be dearly missed by all. caleb consistently managed to find a balance between his work life and his real life. caleb’s philosophy on this can best be described by a quote from author pico iyer. “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be, most often.” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). all who knew caleb well can attest to how he made an effort to spend time on what really matters in life, his friends and family. a pleasant side effect of taking time to spend on the important things was that when he did work, his work was that much better. his impressive accomplishments through life demonstrate that. this aspect of his life, as well as many others, largely stemmed from his incredibly formative time at the university of notre dame. as michael sean winters said in the hesburgh documentary, “there is no job better for an american catholic priest than being president of the university of notre dame.” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). the influence that notre dame has in the world can not be understated. it has an incredible power to do good because of its legacy. by being part of the legacy of such an esteemed institution, it really inspired him to try to do the lord’s work and carry on the mission of notre dame by doing good in everything that he could. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 the predominant way in which he tried to do this was through his career. his passion began at notre dame. he majored in mathematics and physics in college and then used that to go to graduate school and beyond. his passion really developed into a concrete path for his eventual career and his professional goals. while many of us here might not enjoy studying such theoretical concepts, those were his bread and butter. anyone who knew him can attest that he was really in his element when working on physics. as the saying goes, “there is no “best major” out there but there is a “best major for you.”” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo center for career development moreau fye week four). i think we can all agree that he found that ‘best major for him’ which led him to a life where he never really worked a day in his life, because he loved his work. however, while he tried to do good through his work, the most important thing in caleb’s life was to do good by being a virtuous person. as father michael himes said, “one vocation embraces all our other vocations: to be a human being. we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we can possibly be!” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week three). he consistently tried to be the best that he could be. he was a kind and loving person and his actions were meaningful to everyone whose life he touched. while he would be the first to admit he still had room to grow, we can all agree that he was always sincere and always tried to do as jesus commanded, to love your neighbor as yourself. as anyone who knew him could testify that he was always a welcoming person. he never wanted to exclude anyone. he always believed that everyone was special and everyone brought something unique to our shared table of life. if any of you have read the book tattoos on the heart by father gregory boyle, you might remember a certain passage where father boyle tells https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/467258/download?download_frd=1 of his time on a prison island. the inmates came together and shared what little food they had to make a delicious iguana stew (“tattoos on the heart chapter 8 jurisdiction” by father gregory boyle moreau fye week 7). i think this is a helpful image to describe what caleb tried to bring about. when we all come together, we can do better than we could otherwise. this will only happen by being welcoming to all. religion was a major part of his life. a devout catholic, his faith was instrumental in shaping him as a person. he made an effort to always go to sunday mass and for a while, attended daily mass when he could. he said that a priest once told him that finding a deeper relationship with god can be found by attending daily mass and trying to see god in everything and everyone that you encounter each day (week five discussion with father joe kapora moreau fye week five). what we can all take away from being witnesses to his life is that when you live your life in a constant search for god, while you never may really find all the answers, it will lead you to a life of satisfaction and fulfillment while also being a real blessing to everyone around you. that is what he was to all of us. one aspect of him that was always comforting was his constant cool-ness of mind. he always seemed to have his life together and never seemed particularly stressed. i once asked him about that and he responded that he was stressed often. the difference was that he dealt with it in a certain way. he said that he would always face the facts and then sort them out. this reminded me of a quote by psychologist tasha eurich. she said, “if you ask why, [i think] you’re putting yourself into a victim mentality.” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). by facing the facts rather than getting lost in any emotions behind your predicaments, you can avoid clouding your judgment. this allows you to face your problems head-on and have a better grip on life. https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40299/files/523820?module_item_id=167949 https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ all in all, caleb was a man that will be missed by all. he was an inspiration to everyone whose life he touched. he lived a special life and one that we will never forget. may his memory live on and god bless. word count: 1060 alberding nicholas alberding professor kelly moreau 4/25/22 dedication towards happiness · my mission is to live a happy life while helping others. · i will seek to develop, for constantly developing will eventually turn into wisdom. · i will seek first to communicate with others, for creating relationships can be everlasting. · i want to help influence the future development of people and organizations. my development can turn into the development of others down the road. more specifically my children. i want to teach them to be respectful and determined to live meaningful lives. · in my profession, i would like to be successful for others. i will act with consideration and perseverance. everything i do has meaning because it affects those around me. · i would like to constantly travel. understanding the different cultures in the world is extremely important in development. the world is also a beautiful place, and those around it can find inspiration and appreciation for everything it is. · i would like to stay physically active. to lead a healthy life, i believe i will need to host healthy standards for both my mind and body. · i want to give back to my community and those around me. i have been blessed in so many ways and it only feels right to give back to those who are less fortunate. · i hope to be the best version of myself, and through development and relationships, i feel i can one day be successful. i wanted to begin with my mission statement because this is where i strive to be. in the future, i want to live the best life i can for myself as well as others. the prompt asks how can i make this possible. to start, i will naturally live a life well lived if i can successfully follow through with my mission statement. this means i would achieve not only the goals for myself but the goals for my family (inspirations of a life well lived qqc moreau fye week 2). but what does completing my mission statement entail? for starters, i have to get my job in order. the job i eventually have has to be one that i both enjoy and aligns with my morals (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). i would like to pursue something in finance or financial management. i’m currently learning the skills necessary to succeed in this line of work, and with the help of the career center on campus, i will be able to find the right job for me. my mission statement addresses how during work, all of my actions must be calculated because they affect the lives of others. through these considerable actions, the outcomes could lead to friendly relationships. relationships in my eyes are one of the most important parts of living a life well-lived. when it comes to relationships, they take a while to create. it is crucial that people eventually let down their barriers and take the time to form these relationships. now being the financial advisor of someone will have a different relationship than say a close friend. however, slowly but surely, barriers still have to be lowered if there are any chances of having a relationship (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). the people who can be a part of a built relationship can be “all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality,” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac -moreau fye week 10). i strongly believe that it is important to have relationships with all kinds of people. this can develop us culturally and reduce racial prejudice seen every day by people who simply don’t understand the culture of someone else, “there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them. we must be aware and also understanding by reason of fellowship with the impoverished and by reason of patient learning.” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” 2: mission, paragraphs 9-14 moreau fye week 12). our overall intelligence and life experience will develop better through relationships of all kinds, than without them. this leads to my next point of wisdom. i believe with age comes wisdom. in my mission statement, i talk about developing my children into well-rounded individuals. i can only do this when i have enough experiences of my own to share my knowledge. one thing i look forward to sharing with them is that questions are one of the greatest ways to learn. i will encourage them to ask questions when it comes to something they are unsure of because the chances that i have already been in the same situation are very likely (growing in wisdom qqc moreau fye week 11). even when i’m advising my kids, i can still look to my parents for parenting advice because again they have already been through that process with me. referring back to how questions are a fantastic way to learn; questions can also be asked about themselves and the lives they are living. it’s always beneficial to ask these questions because it ultimately allows them to take a step back and make sure they are living the life they wanted to (what life am i living qqc moreau fye week 1). for me, it is important to avoid “why” questions when referring to past experiences in my own life. it is important to use the past to reflect on future decisions rather than worrying about the past. asking why something happened is the wrong way to go about moving forward in life (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). this will allow me to pursue the life i want to live for myself and others. another extremely important factor in pursuing a life well-lived is giving back to others. when i was young, my parents taught me to always give the clothes i grew out of to the local goodwill. while we don’t see where the clothes and shoes end up, we do know that they were able to help out another young boy like me who didn’t have the same access to clothing. it can be hard for many people to understand the suffering that people even in our community have to go through (responding to suffering qqc moreau fye week 9). because we don’t experience it, it is hard for us to understand what it is exactly what they need. when it comes to these different charitable organizations, i would like to give back to the ones that help out the children who are suffering the most in my eyes. i want my kids to give their clothes to goodwill just like i did when i was a kid. so i will continue this tradition of giving back. however, i want to give money away to help those battling cancer or those who could use basic medical attention in africa. whatever effect i have on less fortunate individuals, i want it to be truly meaningful. moving on, personal reflection is also really important in one's development. looking back on how i acted when i was younger compared to now, i tend to think about what other people think more. when i was younger, i would argue about everything. today, i worry less about everything being so concrete or absolute. i’m proud to say that i keep an open mind, which allows me to hear other opinions (discernment conversation moreau fye week 5). eventually, i became a good listener to the point where others would come to me when they needed advice. this aspect allows me to deepen my connection with others, strengthening the relationship. personal reflection doesn’t only include ways to improve but can include objective questions such as “am i happy?”. i’m the only one that will know whether or not i’m happy, not just satisfied with my life, but truly happy (“three questions” by fr michael himes moreau fye week 3). this is my number one point in my mission statement “my mission is to live a happy life while helping others.”. there are clear differences between being happy, or simply satisfied. by being happy, those emotions can spread to other people. if someone is simply satisfied, they might not be able to positively affect someone else like they would be able to otherwise. in conclusion, many things are involved when it comes to living a life well-lived. to me, i have incorporated those attributes into my mission statement. within the next 3 years, i would like to develop more long-lasting relationships with my peers as well as stay physically active. as i get older, i will slowly be able to achieve the different bulletin points needed in my mind to pursue the life that will make me happy. i want to look back at my life one day and know that i did everything i could to live the best life i possibly could. i know that day isn’t anytime soon, but it will come eventually and i’ll be ready for it. the celebration and remembrance of a life well-lived hannah was born july 8th, 2003 in madison, wisconsin. even from day one her life was never dull, as she proceeded to scare all of her family by almost dying of a subdural hematoma (bleeding in her brain). from there it was established that she was a feisty girl with a lot of life in her. the oldest of three girls, hannah rapidly showed her type-a oldest-child personality, just like her parents. she grew up moving around a lot, due to her father’s job, but it just instilled in her a love of travel. however, she always considered the midwest, and specifically wisconsin, her true home. hannah, like her father, spent 11 years in college. she attended all of them at the university of notre dame, and considered the school home and one of her favorite places on earth. she spent her undergrad studying liberal studies and global affairs, concentrating in civil and human rights. she always knew she wanted to be a lawyer, so it was no surprise that after her undergraduate she immediately attended law school and got her j.d. in criminal law. like her parents, she wasn’t satisfied until she had three degrees, going on to get her masters of law in international human rights law. throughout her law degrees, hannah worked for a legal aid office in south bend. after getting her third degree, she landed one of her dream jobs of working for the international justice mission. there, she worked as a prosecutor on cases involving the exploitation, human, and sex trafficking of women and children from around the world. she loved being able to help women and children, and tried her hardest to give them the life and justice they deserved. she believed that her work, one case at a time, could lead to the destruction of human and sex trafficking rings and lead to a safer and better future for everyone. hannah considered the 15+ years she spent with the international justice mission to be some of her most successful and fulfilling years of her life. at 46 hannah was given the opportunity of a lifetime to work for the united nations. there she worked in the departments of human rights and international law. she loved her job, and considered it to be one of her biggest achievements. after spending over 25 years with the united nations, she retired, albeit slightly unhappily, as she was an innate workaholic. hannah, for most of her young life, said that she would never marry or have kids. god had other plans for her. she met her husband, a social worker, at the age of 36 on a sex trafficking case while working for the international justice mission. they instantly clicked, and got married four years later. the two never had any biological children, but adopted an orphaned boy and girl from two different cases that hannah worked on. hannah loved them more than anything. despite the large amount of traveling because of her job, hannah tried to spend as much time with her children as humanly possible, and be there for all of their activities and events. hannah valued experiences and quality time over gifts, so when the kids were old enough hannah took them on many different trips around the world. she believed that exposure to foreign cultures was an essential part of life, and made the world more beautiful. outside of her nuclear family, hannah visited her extended family whenever she got the chance. she was always extremely close to her dad and her maternal grandparents, and spent as much time with them up until their death. when she was younger hannah took multiple trips with her sisters, and frequently tried to see both of them whenever she got the chance. in regards to friends, hannah always preferred quality over quantity. she stayed in touch with her high school friends as well as college friends, and developed many great friendships through both of her jobs. her friends were all very good, hardworking people. her best friend cam played a huge role in her life, and outside of her father’s death and her husband’s death, cam’s death took the biggest toll on her. although she was a workaholic, hannah had many hobbies. she loved to be active. running was her favorite pastime. in the summers she played volleyball and swam, and in the winters she loved to ice skate and ski. she was obsessed with the olympics and the iditarod. once her children were old enough, she quickly got them into rock climbing, something hannah had been doing for almost as long as she lived. hannah was a huge animal lover, and had a number of dogs. she also loved horses and horseback riding. hannah was a big board game and rpg game enthusiast. saturdays were generally dictated as board games and d&d night whenever she wasn’t working. she was a big movie and tv fanatic, often binge-watching shows during any free time she had. hannah’s two biggest passions were reading and traveling. she was always reading a new book (or re-reading favorites) or planning a new trip. hannah was smart, ambitious, hardworking, tenacious, loyal, and dedicated. she was a perfectionist by nature, and a typical first born in that she came out of the womb (a little) bossy and parental. she was fiercely independent and stubborn, but also fiercely loyal to her family, friends, and those she loved. she was a fixer and a feminist. what set hannah apart was her ambition. she had goals, and she gave everything she had to achieve them. she didn’t care about societal norms, and wasn’t frightened by misogynistic conventions. people always said that hannah had such a large and intimidating personality for someone so physically small. hannah was known for being strong. she battled with anxiety and ocpd all of her life, but she never gave up in her fight. she was hardworking, and didn’t really stop being that way up until she died, as retirement didn’t really sit well with hannah. she will be deeply missed for all of her qualities. i chose the elements in my eulogy because i believe they encapsulate my definition of a life well-lived. while i spent a lot of time focusing on work and education, i chose to include more information about her family life and hobbies to emphasize the importance of the need to “slow down our lives” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). i also chose to mention my father and best friend because of the inspirations they are to me in regards to a well-lived life. my father inspires me to love and pursue education, and to help others constantly. cam inspires me to take the time to think about myself and give myself some grace. these inspirations are a big part of me, as seen in all of the hobbies i have, but also the amount of time i spent in college and the job i chose. although the three of us aren’t necessarily the same, as we have some differing values and personalities, “at the end of the day we [are] all fishermen”, in that we can always learn from and inspire each other, based on the humanity all of us have ("hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week 2). i chose to spend a good amount of time talking about my hobbies because i enjoy the question “what are your obsessions”, because i really think they help define a person and how they live their lives ("three key questions" by fr. michael himes moreau fye week 3). my hobbies define me, and bring a lot of happiness to my life, and encompass a lot of my life, so bringing those to the forefront was important. whether it is running, reading, traveling, or playing board games, these hobbies all provide stress relief and are a huge part of who i am. i chose to spend a lot of time on my college career and work career because i really love both, and they bring me so much joy. i find so much joy in learning and developing community, and my college career really encapsulates both. i love that i am helping others and making a difference in people’s lives and impacting the world in my job. because of that i have found that my majors really are the “best major(s) for [me]” (“https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). throughout my eulogy i mention my personality and my defining qualities and characteristics. although some of the terms might not have a typically positive connotation, i have always been really confident in who i am, as demonstrated in the eulogy ("week five discernment conversation activity" by moreau moreau fye week 5). i chose to mention the mental health struggles i have dealt with because i feel that they are crucial in understanding that no one’s life is perfect, and there are always going to be obstacles in a person’s life. although i have been one to “fixate on problems instead of moving forward”, i want to make it clear that you can move away from that in my eulogy, in pursuing your hobbies and taking time for stress relief (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). exercise and meditation are two ways that i have found to be profoundly helpful in dealing with my mental health. if you are stuck, and aren’t trying to deal with it, it doesn’t help achieve a well-lived life . finally, i talked a lot about my existing family and the relationships i have in the eulogy. this is because in order to have a well-lived life, it has to depend on “our relations with others” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). overall, this eulogy encapsulates the elements of what i believe create a well-lived life. having good family and friends, pursuing your hobbies, being confident in yourself, pursuing and loving learning and education, and having a job that you love that provides a service to society all create a well-lived life. each part of the eulogy is important for a different reason in achieving a well-lived life. without all of these parts, a well-lived life would not be achieved. week 8integration 3 7\�0duwlqr 0ruhdx ,qwhjudwlrq����(xorj\ ������ ,q�0hpruldp��$�5hiohfwlrq�rq�wkh�/lih�7kdw�,�+rsh�wr�/lyh 2i�doo�wkh�wklqjv�\rx�frxog�fdoo�7\�0duwlqr��d�txlwwhu�lv�qrw�rqh�ri�wkhp��+h�zdv�dozd\v uhdg\�iru�d�fkdoohqjh�\hw�qhyhu�ghwhuuhg�zkhq�kh�hqfrxqwhuhg�ghihdw��$iwhu�doo��dv�:lqvwrq &kxufkloo�rqfh�vdlg��³vxffhvv�lv�ehlqj�deoh�wr�pryh�iurp�idloxuh�wr�idloxuh�zlwk�hqwkxvldvp´��$qg dw�wkh�fruh�ri�hyhu\�rqh�ri�klv�dfwlrqv��wkhuh�zdv�dq�xqplvwdndeoh�gulyh�wkdw�surshoohg�klp 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rughu�iru�xv�wr�uljkw�wkh�zurqjv�dqg�pdnh�wklv�zruog�d�ehwwhu�sodfh� /lih�fdq�vhhp�vkruw��exw�wkh�lpsdfw�\rx�pdnh�rq�lw�fdq�odvw�d�orqj�wlph��7\�0duwlqr vwulyhg�wr�ohdyh�klv�lpsdfw�rq�d�gdlo\�edvlv��pdnlqj�wkh�zruog�d�euljkwhu�sodfh�iru�wkrvh�zkr zrxog�frph�diwhu�klp��$iwhu�jrlqj�wkurxjk�klv�lghdov�dqg�sdvvlrqv��,�wklqn�lw¶v�vdih�wr�vd\�wkdw�kh zdv�deoh�wr�dffrpsolvk�klv�plvvlrq��,q�wkh�hqg��kh�dozd\v�wulhg�klv�ehvw��dqg�hyhq�li�wklqjv�glgq¶w hqg�xs�jrlqj�wkh�zd\�kh�krshg�kh�nqhz�wkdw�kh�zdv�sxuh�lq�klv�khduw�dqg�wkdw�lq�wkh�hqg hyhu\wklqj�zrxog�doo�zrun�rxw�wkh�zd\�lw�zdv�vxssrvhg�wr��7kdqn�\rx��oryh�wkhh�1rwuh�'dph� dqg�*r�%loov� moreau capstone integration final theo helm 4/25/22 capstone integration moreau fye remembering the bigger picture as my first year at notre dame comes to a close, i can confidently say that my mission statement accurately reflects how i intend to complete the rest of my time here. my most fulfilling and enjoyable moments during the past two semesters all seemed to come as a result of meeting various aspects of my statement, so i hope to use it as my standard for the years ahead in order to make the most of my time. specifically, my mission statement guides the two most important vocations in my life right nownamely, as a student and a member of this community. through following my mission statement with the help of the modules i’ve completed during moreau first year experience, i hope to take advantage of every opportunity i may meet in the semesters to come. the core aspect of my mission statement, and the idea that i lead with, is the idea of service guiding everything i do. specifically, i hope to serve others in any way possible. this may include helping with assignments and exams, comforting someone in a time of hardship, or even service work in south bend. one of my favorite experiences from the past semester was going to the dismas house in downtown south bend to help serve food to ex-inmates trying to enter back into society and find work. because this group of people is often demonized and written off by the rest of society, being able to talk with them and eat with them at the same table was a powerful way to recognize and affirm their dignity. in this way, most of the service i gave to the dismas house simply consisted of being present. week 9 taught me the importance of presence through the story of paul farmer. “accompaniment is a path to deeper understanding, the implications of which couldn’t be foreseen at the outset of the journey together. our task is walking with someone in support of a dignified life.” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). just as paul farmer walked with marginalized groups in south america, i hope to walk with marginalized groups just miles away from the place i call home. it is also important to note that this aforementioned dignity of the dismas house residents lies beyond the material world, and comes a result of the fact that they were created in god’s image. they are loved by god unconditionally, so we should extend the same unconditional love ourselves. week 10’s article by jacob walsh–a gay catholic who felt removed from the scope of god’s love–provides an important insight into this unconditional love: “at the time, i’d thought this meant god loved me in spite of my being attracted to men. but i started to see he was using my sexuality to reach me with his love.” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). god reaches individuals through their vulnerabilities, and i hope to reach people in the same way. in connection with this idea of accompaniment is the idea of leadership, which ought to stem from an attitude of service. although the residents of the dismas house may be different from me, i value them as members of my community and wish to connect with them in order to expand my worldview. such an idea links with the section in my mission statement regarding diversity: “i see every person as a potential friend, and will continue to expand my worldview by meeting a diverse range of people wherever i may end up throughout my life.” week 2’s lesson from the movie about fr. hesburgh demonstrated this well, as fr. hesburgh provided a living example of what it means to be a servant-leader. “[fr. hesburgh] could talk across differences and create trust, create a mutual understanding. that’s the kind of leader we need today” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). if i wish to hold any sort of leadership role in the community, i would find the most fulfillment if i mirror fr. hesburgh since he carried out the ideal social goal of my mission statement. learning about how fr. hesburgh bridged gaps between groups was a major inspiration for how i carried out my allyship activity during week 12 (moreau fye week 12). my mission statement states that i wish to love my community since it is an extension of my home. to demonstrate this, i visited a worship service at a methodist church in south bend. my immediate family converted to catholicism, but the rest of my family is protestant and many of my family members are hostile to the church. in my allyship activity, i hoped to demonstrate my willingness to bridge the gap of the conflict within my family. i also valued this experience as a way to show my support for the greater community of south bend, notre dame can often feel like a bubble within the larger outside community, so it was nice to leave that bubble and interact with people beyond campus. the bubble effect can create a sense of “us” and “them,” which pope francis touched upon in week 7: “the future is, most of all, in the hands of those people who recognize the other as a ‘you’ and themselves as part of an ‘us’” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). by visiting the worship service, i was able to see for certain that i am a member of the “us,” which is the greater south bend community. through all of these applications of the social aspects of my mission statement, i hope to fully and ultimately live out my human vocation of love, which guides each example i’ve given so far. father michael himes summed up this hope well during week 3, where he states “one vocation embraces all our other vocations: to be a human being. we are called to be as intelligent, as responsible, as free, as courageous, and as imaginative, as loving as we can possibly be!” (“three key questions” by father michael himes moreau fye week 3). the other main vocation during the rest of my time here at notre dame is my vocation as a student. not only am i called to learn, but i am called to use this knowledge in service of the greater good through an eventual career. my mission statement states that i hope to use my gifts in service to others, and this journey of discovering my gifts is one that i will continue to undertake during my time here. i hope to try a wide array of activities and classes to figure out what i’m good at, as well as what the world could use right now in order to be brought closer to the christian vision. learning about this process as early as week 4 helped me dedicate the rest of my semester to adopting an open mind about potential paths. one helpful quote from that week reads: “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices. the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo career center moreau fye week 4).” furthermore, it’s not only in the realm of classes that i keep an open mind, but also in the information i take in and the things i learn about. in order to build up my knowledge here, i ought to expose myself to as many different viewpoints as possible. one major issue that could occur in academic environments is narrowness and uniformity in thinking, which leads to ignorance. the core of my student life should be to avoid this, since i am surrounded by people with valuable perspectives. professor blaschko spoke about this “echo chamber” danger during week 11: “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up tolerating diversity of opinion.” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). along with keeping an open mind, the key to maximizing my time here as a student is staying flexible in terms of grades and feedback. i can’t change the outcome of my work, but i can change how i view setbacks. my mission statement reads “as i continue throughout life, i will recognize my inability to control every situation and circumstance, but will always internally affirm my autonomy over my own attitude toward both.” in connection with this is tasha eurich’s quote from week 6: “‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). i may put my best foot forward for an assignment, but i may not always get the result i want. instead of focusing on why a grade turned out the way it did, i could use the setback to ask “what” i may do differently to fix it for next time. it may be easy to get caught up in the minor details, but i should always step back to look at the larger picture to stay on the right course and keep my priorities in order. my mission statement touches upon this idea and reads “i will remind those i am close to that i love them on a regular basis, since obligations and responsibilities often take a higher priority than they should and create distance. in this way, i will always be cognizant of how i spend my time so as to order my life properly. i will place my family and my faith above all else, and will make sacrifices in my own life for the sake of maintaining that hierarchy.” although assignments may seem big in my mind, they all compose my larger vocation of being a student, which isn’t all about academics. it is also about figuring out how i can use my academic skills to serve and build up that which means the most to me. week 1 was helpful in teaching me this lesson of ordering my priorities properly: “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). through the discernment conversation (moreau fye week 5), i learned that social connection takes high priority in my life. for this reason, i am going to order my studies toward a field that allows me to fulfill this desire to be in connection with other people. i will work toward this goal, and will remember to take a step back from assignments to remind myself of this greater mission. in conclusion, my core college vocations are toward being a student and a community member. in both of these things, i intend to explore each opportunity and order my life to fit my mission statement. this first year went by fast, but i hope i will be able to slow down over my next three years to remember and honor what really forms the core of these callings: my faith. my week 8 activity of creating my own eulogy put this in perspective, and i hope to continue to step back and think about the larger picture of my life . urls: week 1: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week 3: https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40380/files/467832?module_item_id=143473 week 4: https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/ edit?usp=sharing week 6: https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript week 8: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1q1tb1ogjk5d5oprwgrbzyyknooqwh2dzmx-u-plvyx y/edit week 9: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/e dit?usp=sharing week 10: https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-ca tholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 week 11: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd week 12: https://docs.google.com/document/d/10yyrqbvz7e7ovqy9893q4ns5pzuga349cbnv28kj2n a/edit week 13: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1eoqyppwvfheiwt7juwdimso3kuvccnbeqo52ybqiei s/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/10yyrqbvz7e7ovqy9893q4ns5pzuga349cbnv28kj2na/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/10yyrqbvz7e7ovqy9893q4ns5pzuga349cbnv28kj2na/edit moreau integration iv rauguth 1 professor cathrine wagner fys 10102 19 april, 2022 follow your dreams a life well lived isn't only a life filled with doing good, but in my opinion it is a life filled with doing good with a purpose. by having your own reasons for your actions you are able to pursue the dreams which you have created, and not those of others. within the modern age of social media it can lead to many people trying to pursue the lives of others rather than pursuing a life of their own. because of this people are losing touch with themselves as they are no longer pursuing the aspirations of themselves, which can lead to a feeling of emptiness. this has led me to develop my own mission of helping individuals focus on themselves and pursue a life because of their own purpose. by helping others find their purpose in life, i won't only be following my own passion but i would be guiding others to pursue a life with purpose, and thus a life well lived. in order for me to continue my pursuit of a life well lived i will begin working towards my mission statement, thus helping others pursue their passions in life. in order to begin progress towards this goal i will be using a portion of my remaining time at notre dame to find a way i can spread the knowledge i have gained about pursuing a life well lived. the first issue that i would like to address would be our tendency to want to imitate others, and to this i say that we must rather find what we are passionate about. within week one pico iyer reflects on just how important meditation is within his life, as it allows him to reflect on him and his actions. with so much of our time now spent on social media, it leads to us becoming envious of those on the platform which is why it is vital for us to instead put that energy into ourselves. now what i am not saying is that you shouldn't look to others for inspiration as imitation is very different from inspiration. when it comes to imitation, much of our social media pages are filtered towards our liking, which can make it very easy for us to fall into what is called an echo chamber. the reason why echo chambers are dangerous is because of their tendency to make us experience very little diversity, and to avoid this we must “be intentional about the information that we expose ourselves to”(week 11), in order to make sure that we don't lose touch with reality nor ourselves. diversity on the other hand, whether that is “differences of culture, religion, and conviction can co-exist with friendship…. ”(week 2), allow for giving-and-receiving relationships rather than the one sided relationship which is imitation. during my time here at notre dame i plan on continuing my journey of exploring the many diverse communities around campus in order to grasp a better understanding of the world as a whole. i believe that if i want to help anyone pursue their passion then i must have at least a basic understanding of what kind of lifestyle they may come from so i can better suit my advice towards the individual. learning from others is the only way we are able to develop as humans which then leads into why keeping an open mind is vital when trying to find your passion. “the rauguth 2 humility to hear what we are good at and the humility to hear what we are not good at is enormously important”(week 3) as this is what allows us a chance to reflect on our actions and find out if we have a purpose behind our actions. throughout my life i have found that collaboration with others is key in order for you to sort out your own ideas. the reflections that we had during week five allowed us to view ourselves from another perspective which further made us consider if we seemed to have a greater purpose behind our actions. then by having others be able to understand your end goals that means you have a very solid understanding of what you are going to pursue and thus there is no hesitation. and although you may not have a perfectly clear idea of what you want to do, taking steps towards finding that purpose is just as important as taking steps towards fulfilling that purpose. by taking steps to pursue our dreams and not the dreams of others we are able to formulate our actions to lead to a feeling of fulfillment rather than emptiness from simply imitating others. during my time here at notre dame i plan on taking advantage of as many opportunities as possible that will lead to me fulfilling my mission. this is why keeping an open mind is so important because over time you’ll alway be able to adjust or even change your purpose based on the new experiences that you have had. as discussed in week four, “career decision making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime”(week 4), which is exactly why searching for a purpose is equally as important as pursuing a purpose. although the goal is to pursue your own passion, you must also take it one step at a time especially when it comes to obstacles. obstacles can be the major cause of someone giving up on their dream which is why it is very important to remember that anything worth having is not going to come without sacrifice. overcoming an obstacle not only gives you a sense of accomplishment but they can also make you realize that “some of the things that [you] could do can be a blessing to some others”(week 6). after overcoming obstacles i tend to find myself thinking about the many people who face much more difficult challenges on a daily basis which is why i have chosen my mission of helping others pursue a life which they are passionate about. within week nine professor reifenberg states that, “accompanying the dying helps you understand what is most important about living”(week 9) which furthers my reasoning for wanting to help others live up to the life they are passionate about, no matter their circumstances. as you may have been able to tell, my life is centered around assisting all others on their journeys and through this i've come to strongly adopt the idea of paying it forward. this i feel is key for myself and others as i feel that you should always help those on the way up in the world as you wouldn't be in the same position if you were never helped. by not secluding yourself above others you are able to build a community of people which can help build eachother up. as is said, “christ is the source of the order of all creation and of the moral law which is written in our hearts”(week 10), which means that we should treat everyone as equals. i feel as though my acceptance into this university is my “call to action on behalf of marginalized communities” (week 12), and so for my remaining years at notre dame i plan to use opportunities as a source of power. though in many cases power can be used for evil, “through humility and concrete love, power becomes a service, a force for good”(week 7). as i have said, my passion and my rauguth 3 mission is to help the future generations. i not only want to lead by example but i want to assist them on their journey and make sure they know they have my support on their journey to find and pursue their purpose. so by pursuing my mission i won't only be pursuing a life well lived but i will be helping others pursue their own purpose which i believe is the change that the world has come to need. citations ("why we need to slow down our lives" , by pico iyer moreau fye week one) ("hesburgh video" , produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two) ("three key questions" , by father micheal himes moreau fye week three) ( “navigating your career journey”, by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) ("the grotto: why does god allow suffering?", by aria swarr moreau fye week six) (“why the only future worth building includes everyone”, by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together ”, by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame”, by a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau week ten) (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by professor paual blaschko moreau week eleven) (“justice on the margins” by suzanne shanahan moreau week twelve) https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/467215?module_item_id=142974 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ week 14 capstone integration three professor oswald moreau fye capstone integration 26 april 2022 a discernment of what i want to do, who i am now, and who i want to be as my first year at notre dame draws to an end, i have begun reflecting on all of the new experiences that i have had, the amazing, genuine people that i have met, and the multitude of life lessons that i have learned. for me, the idea of college has transformed throughout the entirety of this year. before coming to notre dame, college was intimidating. i was about to enter a new environment, states away from home, with people who i had never met before, and i was very scared. however, upon coming to campus, my fear vanished, and excitement took its place. this is the time in my life where my main job is to figure out what makes me, me. i took risks, put one foot in front of the other, and viewed each day as a learning experience. as a result of the culmination of everything that i have learned this year, i have begun to develop what i believe to be a mission statement that will lead me to a life well-lived; it is a combination of effort, morality, and growth. already, living by the moral code outlined in the statement has led to a more fruitful, satisfying life, and i am excited to continue to uphold it as i enter my next three years at notre dame. as of now, my mission statement is as follows: i will strive to do my best, learn from my mistakes, and follow a path of righteousness, in all facets of my life, to ensure that i am continually developing into the best version of myself and acting as a force for good in this world. a lasting theme throughout my freshman year at notre dame is self-reflection, and recognizing the importance of taking time away from school work and other prevalent everyday demands to slow down and focus inwards. this has helped me to learn what it takes to fulfill my mission statement, as taking breaks to reflect will help me to feel my best, so that i can, in turn, do my best. a quote that put self-reflection into perspective for me states, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). here, pico iyer compares taking a “pause” to a “rest in a piece of music,” and in doing so transforms something that i previously thought of as not only unnecessary but inconvenient, into something that adds beauty to life. this quote resonated with me and came at a time when i needed it most. at the beginning of this year, i was stressed, scared, and feeling overwhelmed by my classes and coursework. i was not taking breaks, i was not prioritizing myself, and in doing so, i was losing myself. as bad as it sounds, i was living to work, not working to live. my mental health was at a low, and it was not aided by the changing, bitter weather and cold. however, iyer’s quote reminded me that work is not everything that life is about. yes, it is important to complete my homework, however, i have come to learn it is equally as important to take time for peace and reflection. once i began taking a few moments each day to do something that makes me happy, whether that was taking a walk, a nap, or hanging out with friends, my mentality greatly improved. whereas before, school felt chore-like, i was now excited for each new day. this life lesson about the importance of stepping away from work to focus on my internal needs, will not only lead me to live a life well-lived but will also help me put my mission statement into action. from this experience i learned that in order to do my best, https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ i need to feel my best, and for that reason, i need to take care of myself, take time for rest and breaks, and prevent burnout over these next three years. another fundamental aspect of my mission statement is morality. each and every day i hope to strive to be a better person than i was the day before, which sometimes means taking the path less traveled. the idea of taking the path of righteousness in each situation is a little daunting because it is much easier said than done, however, the life story of father hesburgh dispelled any anxiety that i held. one particular quote that spoke to me most throughout his movie states, “noone likes to look at the heart of darkness…the real solutions are painful” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). throughout his lifetime, hesburgh was compassionate even in the hardest moments. he held morality as a top priority and led an extraordinary life, which provided me with an example of someone i wanted to mirror my actions after. there have been many moments throughout my experience at notre dame where i have been faced with difficult decisions and acted in a way that was right but was extremely hard. one social example is gossiping. i have many friends who love to gossip about any topic, and generally, it is harmless until it becomes about people that we know well. it is at these moments that i am automatically uncomfortable in the conversation because i put myself in the shoes of the person being talked about, and i feel shame. it is a tough thing to take a stand against gossiping, however, because you risk adding awkwardness to the conversation, or being left out of other conversations due to not being “cool.” though, to fulfill my goal of living with righteousness, like father hesburgh, i speak up and have learned to change the course of the conversation without adding awkwardness or coming across harshly. this is an incredibly useful skill that i have developed, and one that i hope to keep improving. i believe that if i continue to act in a way that reflects my best possible self each day, i will not only grow towards living a life https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 well-lived, but i will continuously act in a way that exemplifies and utilizes my mission statement. by doing so, i will create a moral foundation on which i hope to make the positive impact that i hope for over these next three years at notre dame. as i have begun to try to transform my mission statement into a lifestyle, i have the hardest part to be holding myself accountable. there is always an excuse, such as “oh, today wasn’t a good day, i will start implementing it tomorrow” or “i am tired, i will put effort towards this later” etc. however, one lady who helped remind me of the urgency for actively living my mission statement is sister athelia, a nun who reminds herself daily of her own death. one quote that sat with me and changed my perspective reads, “remembering death keeps us awake, focused, and ready for whatever might happen — both the excruciatingly difficult and the breathtakingly beautiful” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). in this quote, sister athelia reminds me that tomorrow is not guaranteed, and therefore i need to be grateful for each and every day. from this, i have learned that i need to hold myself accountable for living by my mission statement every day, excuse free. this has meant that i do things every day that i believe to be moral, righteous, or simply trying to be my best self. these things may be little, such as picking up free-floating trash, or larger, such as lending a shoulder to an upset friend. however, once i have started trying to focus on the core values of my mission statement, i have begun to live a more fulfilling lifestyle, and my perspective has been positively altered; i no longer take a single day for granted, instead, i am immensely grateful for a new opportunity to grow into my best self. these new practices have helped me to begin maintaining the values of my mission statement and will serve me well throughout my time at notre dame. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html in the same light, viewing each new day as an opportunity has allowed me room for immense and ongoing self-discovery. i have come to realize that if there was an institution to learn how to not only positively transform my mind but also my heart, it is the university of notre dame. here, i have learned that introspection is just as important as schoolwork. as i have previously stated above, self-discovery is invaluable; how could i implement my mission statement and be the best version of myself, when i don't even know who that is? for this reason, i have realized that taking time specifically dedicated to discerning who i am is incredibly important. a useful, inspirational quote from the undergraduate career services that echoes my newfound mentality reads, “we know that life is busy and it’s hard to take the time to slow down and process. but if you give yourself that time you will gain so much” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). therefore, when i do take breaks away from my intense school schedule, i try to do things that further my personal growth or allow time for thought. one of my favorite activities along these lines is to take a walk around the lake when i am feeling stressed or overwhelmed. being surrounded by nature rather than classrooms allows me the space to free my mind, solve many of my own problems, and rid myself of any gripping anxiety. as i have emphasized, an important aspect of my mission statement is doing my best each day, and although “my best” will vary, i cannot give sufficient effort towards this if i am not feeling peaceful, rejuvenated, or motivated. therefore, i have learned that taking time for personal reflection is not only beneficial but crucial, to living out my mission statement and growing into the best version of myself over the next three years. one thing that i have learned throughout this year is that my parents truly are my most valuable resource, and i need to utilize their wisdom more often to fulfill my goal of maintaining my mission statement throughout my time at notre dame. not only do they provide me with https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ immense amounts of support and love, but they know me, both who i am and who i want to be, and they hold me accountable for being my best self. for example, in moreau class, we had to ask someone close to us some personal questions to try and decipher what a life well lived means to us through the eyes of someone else. i talked with my dad, and one of the quotes that stood out to me from the conversation was, “you want to be able to look back and believe that your imprint had a positive impact on the lives of others…you desire to please, and receive the greatest happiness when people around you are happy because of your actions” (conversation with my dad moreau fye week 5). this quote was eye-opening to me because it really did put my innermost motivations and pleasures into words. even miles away from him, my dad knows me to my core and keeps me focused on what truly matters to me. i remember that this conversation came at a time in the semester when i was incredibly overwhelmed and feeling dejected, exhausted, and constantly anxious. talking with my dad reminded me of what is most important to me, and reoriented my mentality back to trying to live out my mission statement: trying my best, learning from my failures, and living with righteousness. i was newly motivated to continue to strive toward excellence and take life one day at a time. i really appreciated this exercise, and believe that it helped me accept the challenges that come with growth, refocus my mind on actively implementing my mission statement into my daily life, and overall as dory from finding nemo says, “just keep swimming.” as i try to live out my mission statement over the next few years and ultimately guide myself towards a life well-lived, i have realized that certain mentalities are limiting. school is not easy, and i have not been immune to the daily struggles of social and academic pressures. there have been times this year where i have studied what feels like infinite hours for a big test and walked out of it wondering why i bothered studying at all. i would ask myself, “why does this keep happening to me?,” or “why am i not smart enough?”. these questions were detrimental to my mental state, as they made it so i focused on my failures. one relevant quote that i found helpful during my times of struggle reads comes from ted speaker tasha eurich reads, ‘why’ questions trap us in our past; ‘what’ questions help us create a better future” ( “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich ph.d. moreau fye week 6). when i really sat and thought about the meaning of this quote, i realized that eurich was uring me to not focus on where i had gone wrong, but rather ask ‘what’ i could do to improve in the future. this change in mindset greatly correlates with my mission statement, as i state that i will learn from my mistakes, and this means adopting a growth mindset, assessing and accepting my faults, and working towards betterment rather than beating myself up. from this, i have learned that by living through the optimistic tone of my mission statement, and in doing so, striving towards a life well-lived, i need to not only understand the difference between ‘why’ and ‘what’ questions, but also work to remove the former, pessimistic questions out of my vocabulary. this distinction will serve me well throughout my time in the rigorous academic environment at notre dame, and provide me with the necessary motivation to continue to strive to be my best self despite challenges or setbacks. in the formation of my mission statement, i acknowledge that living with righteousness does not just apply to my personal moral compass, but also to how i treat others as well. i believe that it is through treating others with compassion, care, and utmost respect that i will have the best notre dame experience over the next three years, and ultimately live a fulfilling and well-lived life. i have never struggled with treating others the way that i would like to be treated, however, there is always room for improvement, and i need to continue to hold myself to high standards of kindness. acting with the moral character outlined in my mission statement will https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/modules/items/144754 help me to fulfill this goal. in this way, i will strive to continually care for those around me, and regard each and every person with respect and care. a quote that i took inspiration from is spoken by his holiness pope francis, and states, “let us help each other, all together, to remember that the other is not a statistic or a number. the other has a face. the "you" is always a real presence, a person to take care of” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis for ted conferences moreau fye week 7). this quote encapsulates the way that i strive to act and reminds me that it is important to not become too caught up in my own life that i disregard those around me. i believe that is our obligation as individuals that are beautifully and equally created in the image of god to treat each other with tenderness and respect, no matter what. it is hard sometimes to uphold this philosophy because as i have seen in some of my experiences in college, not everyone is deserving of your kindness, however, it is in these situations that i believe it is the most important to treat that individual with compassion and respect. for example, someone that i thought was a friend began spreading false rumors about me this semester which damaged one of my other relationships. i was initially angry and hurt because i couldn't understand why they would do such a thing. however, upon reflection, i realized that the best way to remedy the situation was to talk to them about where they were coming from, why they did what they did, and how it made me feel. the conversation ended up going well because i approached the situation calmly and with an open mind. this was a pivotal learning experience for me because i really put my mission statement into practice. i was able to have a successful, enlightening conversation with someone who had really hurt my feelings, and left without saying anything i didn't mean and without becoming angry. i was very proud of myself at this moment, and it cemented in my mind that even those who have wronged me are still deserving of both respect and kindness. therefore, by living through my mission https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript statement, not only was i able to be mature in an upsetting situation, but i acted righteously, treated the other individual fairly, and walked away with a stronger sense of self. this practice will be essential over the next three years at notre dame and beyond, and because of this, living through my mission statement will lead to a better, more animated life. this year for moreau class we were assigned the task of writing our own eulogy. i ended up writing a letter to my future self instead, which i found to be a very enlightening task. talking to my younger self forced me to reflect on my life, think about what worked and didn't work, and decipher what advice i would have liked to have had growing up. this assignment helped me to form what i believed to be essential aspects of a life well-lived, and also aided in shaping my mission statement. because i was giving advice to my younger self, i thought in-depth about my morals, current values, and what i hold to be important. in doing so, i walked away from the integration assignment with a stronger sense of my own identity. in the introduction of my letter i wrote, “you will learn that a life well-lived is built on a foundation of self-love, righteousness, compassion, and gratitude” (“a life well-lived, through the eyes of someone still figuring it out” by for moreau integration moreau fye week 8). this quote directly mirrors the values of my mission statement, which demonstrates the effect the integration assignment had on forming my life goals. moreau class has consistently opened my eyes to different aspects of a life well-lived, has had a great positive impact on my current self, and has helped me shape who i want to be in the future. by encouraging personal reflection in the integration assignment, i was able to develop the foundations of my mission statement, which is invaluable as i will now use it as a guide for the next three years at notre dame and my life beyond. another fundamental part of my mission statement is the desire to be a force for good both in my notre dame community and in the world. however, i have learned that what i believe to be “good” may not necessarily be what others need or perceive to be “good”. for this reason, i believe that it is important for me to continue to be receptive to the actual needs of others instead of letting grand charitable intentions cloud my judgment. this idea is exemplified by the word “accompaniment” and means acting in a complementary way that supports others. i have put this practice of accompaniment into action on campus, and whether it is cleaning up campus trash, picking up someone’s delivered groceries and bringing it to them, or seeing that one of my friends in a class left their book behind, i strive to always act in a conscientious, kind way and do the right thing, even if it is inconvenient or no one is watching. a quote that further inspired me to continue acting this way comes from a story written by steve reifenberg relaying his experiences volunteering at an orphanage in south america. his quote states, “[the children] did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). the quote emphasizes that the children took it upon themselves to care for steve reifenberg in his time of need. they asked for no recognition or thanks, but simply did what was needed when it was needed; a fundamental aspect of accompaniment. in creating my mission statement i tried to include the ideas of accompaniment, which to my understanding means emphasizing the values of companionship, brotherhood, and compassion in all interactions to effect positive change. therefore, through living by my mission statement, i will not only be able to fulfill my own life now and in the future, but also truly fulfill the lives of those around me at notre dame and beyond. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit i believe that to live a rewarding life in my time at notre dame and in the future, i need to be the best person and friend that i can be despite my inability to personally relate to certain struggles faced by others, such as those regarding sexuality or race. my mission statement implores me to be my best self, act righteously and learn from my mistakes, all of which will greatly aid me in trying to be sympathetically there for others in their times of need. one quote that has helped form my mission statement, and resonates with me in these situations due to its emphasis on viewing the world with undying love and compassion reads, “as the incarnate word, christ taught the law of love of god and sent the holy spirit that we might live lives of love and receive the gift of eternal life” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by du lac: a guide to student life, university of notre dame moreau fye week 10). from this quote, i am compelled to live a life following the actions and teachings of christ and giving unconditional love to those around me. by doing so, i will not only comfort and support those around me who need it, but i will also ensure that i am truly acting as a force for good in the world, which is a foundational aspect of my mission statement. i believe that it is never inconvenient to be compassionate or sympathetic, and for this reason, i will continue to strive over these next three years to show love to those suffering around me, whether i can relate or not. i have not yet encountered a situation at notre dame where a friend of mine was struggling with a racial or sexuality-related conflict, however, when this does arise in the future, i will be equipped with the caring, sympathetic mindset necessary to aid in any way that i am able. therefore, by living by the values set in my mission statement, and adapting them to each given situation, i will be able to act as a force for good over the next three years, which will allow me the most fulfilling notre dame experience. https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ understanding the importance of forming my own opinions and standing by them is something that will serve me well during my time at notre dame, and prevent me from entering “bubbles” or “echo chambers.” i am not perfect, however, so in forming my own opinions i have realized that it is important that i do so with an open mind, and seek out those who disagree to understand where they are coming from. learning from my mistakes is an idea at the heart of my mission statement, and it will help me to be successful and diverse in my thought process during these next three years. this idea is directly supported by dr. pete blaschko who states, “we should be intentional about the information we are exposed to, seeking out intelligent people with whom we disagree and attempting to fully understand their arguments” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week 11). to truly live out my mission statement, and learn from my mistakes, i need to use those around me to fully develop my opinions, rather than blindly following feedback from like-minded individuals. building this into my daily practices would not only lead to a more enriched life but one that is more connected rather than polarized. to fulfill the goals of my mission statement, i need to be unafraid in my pursuit of righteousness and show love and support to those around me. so far, my time at notre dame has instilled in me a drive to better the world around me. i am surrounded by so many kind, thoughtful, genuine people that inspire me to be my very best self. every time that i have been down this past year, my friends are always there to pick me up. i know that i can count on them for anything, and that level of accompaniment is invaluable to me and makes me feel less lonely away from home. their kindness inspires me to support others in the way that i feel supported by them. this has helped form the portion of my mission statement relating to both becoming the best version of myself and striving to be a force for good. the best version of myself is the https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s&ab_channel=thinknd version that is there for those around me, is a continual source of kindness and support, and helps others through their hardships. in living this way, i will be a force for good in my campus community for the next three years. a quote that i believe encapsulates my mission to positively aid those around me reads, “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them, we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them, we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” ( “constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by 2: mission, paragraph 12 moreau fye week 12 ). this quote deeply spoke to me and reminded me that i am not alone in my sufferings. whatever pain or suffering i feel, someone else could feel that same suffering or worse, and for this reason, i am called to be accepting and empathetic. i will strive to continue to uphold my mission statement by being there for those around me, creating an inclusive, supportive environment, and working to make the world a better place. my mission statement was crafted during the last week of moreau class. i loved this activity because i was able to reflect on my morals, what i find to be important in life, and who i want to be in the future. the assignment was slightly challenging because i had to consolidate my beliefs and life goals into one sentence. however, in the end, i am extremely proud of how it came out, and even more so, motivated to live by it each and every day. once again, my mission statement reads: “i will strive to do my best, learn from my mistakes, and follow a path of righteousness, in all facets of my life, to ensure that i am continually developing into the best version of myself and acting as a force for good in this world” (“personal mission statement” by university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week 13). my words were born out of a desire to be a better person, a positive influence, and lead a life of no regret. i realized, through introspection, that i am most fulfilled when i am acting morally and in a way that https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ benefits others; this is how i derive the most satisfaction. if this is so, why would i not then hold myself accountable to those standards each day? i am newly inspired to continually grow into a better version of myself, take advantage of the education of both the mind and heart that i receive at notre dame, and transform my mission statement from a goal into a lifestyle. in doing so, the life that evolves from my mission statement will yield true fulfillment and happiness throughout my next three years and life beyond. in conclusion, my mission statement is a true encapsulation of both my aspirations for the future and my current moral compass. although i will strive to uphold the current mission statement, as i grow and my goals mature, i am sure that the mission statement will evolve. it will be through this positive evolution that i will grow into the person that i am meant to be and live a life well-lived. after articulating personal goals for my life into a concise statement, i am motivated to uphold it each and every day to be the best person, friend, student, etc. that i can be during my time at notre dame and beyond. i believe that if i can uphold the values iterated in my mission statement, my life will not only be happy because i am acting in a way that brings fulfillment to me, but i will be able to positively impact the lives of others. i am incredibly grateful to the university of notre dame and especially moreau for starting the conversations to lead me on a journey to develop both my mind and my heart. i excitedly await the life that comes from grounding myself in my beliefs and acting as a force for good through morality, accompaniment, and consideration. the power of mindfulness and open-mindedness convictions are the aspect of our lives that keep us grounded in certain morals. there are some convictions that are instilled in us-like being a hard worker. this characteristic is one of the driving factors that got us accepted into notre dame. thus, having this natural gravitation towards hard work ensures when life gets harder, we can out work the hard times and maintain a life worth living. yet, everyone has at least one conviction that wasn’t force fed to us in youth, and it is most likely the one that will shape our lives over the next four years. my personal convictions that have shaped me so far are being an active participant in my life and learning how to adapt to different methods of helping people. the ability to maintain an active part in life sounds like it should be easy, but it is quite easy to miss out on life. it’s a fear that some people have, maybe this is my fear too, that they hit fifty years-old and can’t recall what they’ve done with the past 30 years. this fear doesn’t have to be centered around being wildly successful and famous, but its more focused on not realizing that so much time has passed without really being present in the moments. this is a conviction for me because i have personal experience with this feeling, zoning out on life for too long. i experienced this feeling in the navy, i found myself just existing without experiencing life. i realized i did this when i visited some friends in a previous duty station over the summer. as i was driving in the small town of ballston spa, i realized i completely missed how amazing that area was, and it was from not being present during that time in my life. a key aspect to maintaining this mindfulness is through joy that, “comes from within, and it’s a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life” (father michael himes). similarly, to how father himes describes it, joy is based on a peacefulness with life versus a feeling of happiness in the moment. not every day in a joyful life will be happy, but joy can still be present overall. however, it is difficult to maintain this mindfulness because it is easy to see our lives full of flaws. my plan to be present in my life from now on is by focusing on the good and the bad in the moments. i think the act of zoning out is a coping mechanism to an extent to dissociate from the bad in life, but this action is detrimental in the long term to a person’s mental health. therefore, the act of focusing on everything that life gives me will let me experience life in those moments to the fullest. accordingly, maintaining my participation in life will make me a more active individual in society, i know i will be more equipped to help others as a doctor if i remain mentally well in my mindfulness. another conviction that fuels me in a less selfish way is an open-mindedness to ways of helping our world and people. a problem that is common in our times now is the lack of listening to what is needed. people in power tend to think they know what is best without listening to others. as mr. deresiewicz states, “we have a crisis of leadership in america because our overwhelming power and wealth” (william deresiewicz, 2009). however, the crisis i see is the inability to collaborate between leaders for a solution. there is an ego in our country that prevents our “leaders” from fixing anything because everyone believes they know best. however, i do not want to be that type of leader, i have seen the necessity for collaboration for a better outcome. for example, due to the relative infancy of the ship i was stationed on, there were some unwritten troubleshooting procedures for certain electrical components. when procedures weren’t already written we had to write one, and this was accomplished in a group of two or three very capable electricians. this collaboration made the process quicker and the procedure safer because we were able to help each other remember the needed steps and safety measures. this group taught me the beauty in having such diverse minds, it allows for a more efficient and stronger answer. i plan to implement this conviction by staying open-minded in all situations. open-mindedness can take practice and the best way to do this is by actively listening to other’s opinions. one thing that might hinder my progress in this is the concept of isolation mr. deresiewicz alludes to that so many college students fall victim to (william deresiewicz, 2014). therefore, while in college i plan to actively fight this isolation so i can continue making those relationships that will blossom my view on the world around me. this open-mindedness and collaboration will make me a better leader, doctor, wife, and mother (one day). these characteristics will allow me to listen rather than dogmatically assume i am right. convictions allow me to dream of my future because i know what drives me to my goals. i won’t be some high political leader because i know that’s not what i am called too. yet, i know i am called to leadership in some aspect. i have been in a leadership position, and i was still young, so i still had a lot to learn but i thoroughly enjoyed the position. i was elated for the people i worked with when they were successful, and i loved being able to stand up for them in trying times. in my future i want to be a top medical professional in my field, along the lines of head of orthopedics at a hospital. in my personal life, i want to be a reflective leader to my future family. i believe these goals will be accomplished with my convictions and asking the right question introspectively as ms. eurich discusses (tasha eurich, 2017). instead of asking why i have these goals, i want to focus on what i need to do to be a good leader in life. integration three clark 1 fys 10102 4 march 2022 a life of perspective, a life well-lived one of the characteristics of a life-well lived is that of self-reflection, and more importantly, the ability to change one’s life based on that self-reflection. in her life, maggie worked towards this self-reflection through her consistent work towards slowing down in terms of her work and family life balance. every time when she got home from work, she would put away the laptop and make sure to take a lot of her life to spend time with her beloved family. she found “vienna” by billy joel to be very inspirational in leading her to this conclusion of life’s importance not solely lying on work, but also on our ability to slow down our lives and reflect on what is truly important. all in all, she realized that “ in the end, all our journeys have to bring us home” and that the true importance lies in that introspective journey home, rather than the extremely busy nature of our daily work lives (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). another characteristic of maggie’s life was her ability to converse and get along with people of all different opinions. in her personal and professional life, she had colleagues and friends who disagreed with her. instead of only ignoring their differences or belittling them, she encouraged the discussion of their opinions. in a world of ever-increasing polarization and animosity towards differing opinions, she encouraged the belief that “you can’t censor ideas that disagree with your own” (“hesburgh” film–moreau fye week two). in this core belief, she strengthened and questioned her own beliefs, thus ultimately allowing her to become a stronger-willed and more sympathetic person in general. clark 2 besides looking at both sides in terms of opinion, maggie also looked at both sides of the scenario in terms of the idea of life. while it might initially seem pessimistic, maggie lived with her death in mind. she believed that “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness…but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham–moreau fye week three). in order to live for her death, maggie made sure to spend her time wisely and therefore make her life worthwhile. because of this, she remained a dedicated catholic throughout her life and was sure to donate her time and money to those who needed it more than herself. while her work evidently did not take up all of her time, maggie’s job was really important to her. she made sure to contribute to the world positively and in a way about which she was passionate. to do this, she was an editor at a print newspaper–she believed in the power and importance of journalism. throughout her schooling and her 20s, she contemplated careers for a long time before ultimately landing in the publishing field. this era of self-discovery was extremely important to her well-being and liking of her career in the long run since “you have to know yourself first your values, interests, personality, and skills (vips) before you can make effective career choices” (“navigating your career journey”– moreau fye week four). even though she was satisfied with this career choice, she also realized that “the process of discernment is an ongoing, lifelong endeavor” (“spring 2022 week five: discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity”– moreau fye week five) her life reflected this. she moved around a lot for her job, and worked in all areas of publishing–the writing, editing, and business sides–as her desires for her life and career changed. in this exploration of various areas of a singular field, maggie came to understand and be able to effectively clark 3 communicate with people of all different backgrounds. in both her career, and more importantly in her life well-lived, this unique perspective was fundamental to her ever-present curiosity and desire to learn. maggie’s life was characterized by career discernment, in addition to personal discernment. introspection became essential to her, especially as her life became more chaotic as her career advanced and her family developed. she practiced introspection by beginning the habit of walking. she began this habit at notre dame, and continued it throughout the rest of her life. in this way, she became more connected to nature and therefore to god’s creation. she learned to slow down and appreciate the beauty in her life, and was sure to do so by taking these walks alone. this solitude gave her important daily reflective time, and thus allowed introspection to positively affect all aspects of the rest of her life. introspection in this way also allowed her ample time to contemplate her life and her decisions daily, thus making it a process that did not seem as scary when it came to bigger life decisions. her strategy for this was always asking “what?” instead of “why? since she believed that “‘why” questions trap us in our past; “what” questions help us create a better future” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)”–moreau fye week six). after all of this, perhaps the most important aspect of maggie’s life was the people in it. she was a caring, loving wife and mother, and a kind, compassionate human being in general. she treated all of those around her with kindness, since she lived vehemently by the golden rule. in this, she created a beautiful community in which all were welcome no matter their background. with this, she thought that “sometimes you’re thrown into each other’s jurisdiction, and that feels better than living, as the buddhists say, in the ‘illusion of separateness’”(“tattoos on the heart chapter 8” by greg boyle–moreau fye week 7). this idea of fate drove her every clark 4 action and treatment of others, ultimately leading to the life well-lived so evidently exhibited by her story. kuipers taylor kelly moreau 19 april 2022 i will. ultimately, my purpose on this earth is to serve others. wherever i go, i will use my privilege, education, and gifts to improve the lives of others. i will elevate the voices of others, not simply push my own to the forefront. i will work together with others, always being respectful and nonjudgemental. i will affirm the dignity of all people. while in college, i will prepare myself for a life of service without losing sight of the actions and impact possible at the moment. when talking with my father for the week 5 reflection activity, he noted that i have always had a passion for serving others and that he can only imagine me in a career where i will be positively impacting the lives of others. sagely, he also pointed out that the idealist inside of me can imagine a better world while my inner realist helps discern what is possible. while i browsed the msca symposium abstracts website, the cultivating dignity-affirming institutions project piqued my interest. this project pledges to “contribute to scholarship, practice, and policy in better understanding what it means for an institution to be dignity-affirming, [facilitate] the creation of structures and systems that affirm dignity in all types of institutions, and [devise] approaches for holding institutions accountable to achieving this end” (week 12). this sounded so interesting that i reached out to the project’s director to ask how i could get involved. i plan on working as a project and research assistant with this initiative starting this fall. through involvement in this initiative as well as volunteering throughout my college years, i hope to positively impact the world around me. throughout my whole life, i have been inspired by people like kiersten dehaven who have “exhibited a commitment to supporting less fortunate women and children throughout the world” (week 2). though i’m not exactly sure where i will end up after graduation, i will strive to find a career that allows me to impact the lives of others. i will especially focus on improving and protecting the lives of women and children, just as kierstan dehaven does, even though it may look different for me. i hope to involve myself in more research projects while in college so i can prepare myself for undertaking my own research initiatives later on. research is a tangible way in which i can add knowledge to the world and enable meaningful action. throughout my college years and beyond, wherever and however i am serving, i will do so responsibly and respectfully. having learned from dissatisfaction with how certain service opportunities were run in the past, i will ensure that my efforts in the future elevate the voices of others without pushing my own. as stever reifenberg writes, “solidarity with the poor means not to try to be the voice of the voiceless…this is not the goal. the goal should be that those who have no voice today will have a voice and will be heard” (week 9). furthermore, having learned the power of working with others even though we may have differences from tattoos on the heart, i will strive to not judge others and will build meaningful relationships with members of the communities i am trying to help. a line from this book that struck me was “he…was…not…my…enemy. he was my friend. we worked together” (week 7). this was said by an individual after a rival gang member was killed, emphasizing how shared humanity trumps any judgments or differences we may have. finally, i will seek to make a tangible change, not just pay lip service to a cause or belief. unlike those “millions of americans…engaging in politics in ways that are emotionally satisfying, but ultimately self-defeating,” i will not take action to make myself feel good, but will instead take meaningful action to help others (week 11). i will never stop learning about myself and growing as an individual. i will not shy away from the ugly, confusing, or uncomfortable aspects of life—it is precisely within these spaces that we grow in our humanity. i will not become complacent and remain static. especially in the formative years of college, i will push myself to grow. one way i can grow as an individual is through introspection. i will constantly ask myself “what” questions instead of “why” questions in order to “create a better future” (week 6). during college, when life becomes increasingly busy, i will consistently make time for myself to process and think. i will do so by purposefully not filling my schedule with every possible activity, taking time to walk and experience nature, and limiting time spent scrolling through social media. during the quiet times i find, i will let my mind wander so i can process and brainstorm. another way i will grow is through facing situations and conversations that may be uncomfortable or even ugly. sister theresa aletheia noble believes that “it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (week 3). taking that statement to heart, i will not shy away from the darkness in our world and in my life. in the past, i have tended to avoid things that are hard or ugly, especially when it comes to my life or mind. in addition to introspection, i will also begin therapy once i transfer over to notre dame. taking this step, though daunting, will positively impact how i interact with others and the world around me. there are many more uncomfortable or ugly things that i must face to grow. as robin diangelo points out, talking to white people about racism is difficult because“we experience a challenge to our racial worldview as a challenge to our very identities as good, moral people. it also challenges our sense of rightful place in the hierarchy. thus, we perceive any attempt to connect us to the system of racism as a very unsettling and unfair moral offense” (week 10). however, it is clear that racism must be faced in order for it to change. i will not shy away from uncomfortable conversations about topics like racism because i know i have a lot to learn and improve upon. additionally, i will seek other ways to meet new people, learn about different issues, and push myself out of my comfort zone, i will do this through joining clubs, attending lectures and conferences, and taking challenging courses. more specifically, i hope to find a club where i can utilize spanish in some capacity. also, i applied for a diplomacy course in the fall semester which would push me out of my comfort zone by practicing public speaking. i will embrace the beauty of life. i will allow myself to fully experience the life that god has for me. i will focus on the people i care about and on myself, building a full and well-rounded life. when immersed in a routine during college, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (week 1). i will ensure that i don’t miss the beauty of life around me, especially in the three short years of college remaining. i will take pictures (but not too many), enjoy time with friends and family, go to the snite more often, spend time in nature, admire the dome, and take opportunities to travel. i will do my best to fully enjoy wherever i am in life. most importantly, i will be fully and unapologetically myself. i will also allow myself to experience life without feeling the need to control or force it. i believe that god has a beautiful plan for my life, and i will not stress too much about ensuring that i follow a set plan. one practical way of reminding myself of this is the statement “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (week 4). though i can do everything in my power to control my destiny by choosing a major, ultimately, it is up to god where i end up. i will not be afraid to change course if i am called elsewhere. ultimately, my purpose on this earth is to serve others. wherever i go, i will use my privilege, education, and gifts to improve the lives of others. i will elevate the voices of others, not simply push my own to the forefront. i will work together with others, always being respectful and nonjudgemental. i will affirm the dignity of all people. while in college, i will prepare myself for a life of service without losing sight of the actions and impact possible at the moment. i will never stop learning about myself and growing as an individual. i will not shy away from the ugly, confusing, or uncomfortable aspects of life—it is precisely within these spaces that we grow in our humanity. i will embrace the beauty of life. i will allow myself to fully experience the life that god has for me. i will focus on the people i care about and on myself, building a full and well-rounded life. references: (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one) (“domer dozen” by the university of notre dame moreau fye week two) (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three) (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four) (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six) (tattoos on the heart by greg boyle moreau fye week seven) (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine) (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten) (“passion isn’t enough” by hidden brain moreau fye week eleven) (“msca symposium abstracts” by the office of the provost moreau fye week twelve) integration 3 moreau integration three 3/4/22 a look back on the life of alex never had a concrete idea of what he wanted to be. he would sometimes ask himself what life he was living? what was his purpose? what did he want to do with his life? the stressful life of a college student came with many obstacles which overwhelmed him at times. however, he was no stranger to stress. when he was younger he was easily frustrated when work piled up or when he was confused. that continued to be the case until he finally found time for himself. he recognized the benefits of taking a step back from his work to self-reflect and to escape from the everyday troubles he encountered. he would agree with one of the most influential figures of all time, mahatma gandhi, who was said to have woken up and told those around him, “this is going to be a very busy day. i won’t be able to meditate for an hour.” his friends were taken aback at this rare break from his discipline. “i’ll have to meditate for two.” (why we need to slow our lives down by pico lyer moreau week one) it’s so easy to get caught up in the troubles and tribulations of day to day life. the stress that comes with these everyday tasks can deteriorate one’s mental health even further. alex came to understand the importance of taking a step back from the tasks at hand so that when he finally came around to them, he addressed them effectively and efficiently. he took walks around the lakes multiple times every week, letting his mind wander, as he soaked in the surrounding beauty. he would tell you to do the same. even if you can’t answer the questions nagging at the back of your mind, taking time for yourself calms you down and alleviates pent up stress and frustration. alex used to be focused on all the things he couldn’t do or control. he would become caught up in his imperfections and think about how much of a failure he was. that was until he started being grateful for the things he did have. he was healthy, had great friends, a loving family, attended a prestigious university, and so much more. there was a lot to be proud and thankful for. when he focused on these things, he was able to shut out thoughts of being a failure or not enough to others. dr. kim, a survivor of a horrible snowboarding accident which left him paralyzed talked about the importance of being thankful for what we have. “i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others.” (5 minutes by grotto/dr. jihoon kim moreau week six) alex was extremely lucky to live the life he did, and the more he realized that, the more he was able to love himself, and more importantly, love the people around him. one of the questions that always bothered alex was what he wanted to do when he graduated from college. he never knew how to answer this question. a passage about dr. rene bermea’s inspiration behind pursuing a career in medicine opened alex’s eyes to where he could start looking, regarding his future. bermea was, “a freshman in high school when his younger sister… was diagnosed with a rare and life-threatening brain tumor that required surgery and left her dependent on a slew of medications to support her endocrine system. this served as his motivation to pursue a career in medicine.” (domer dozen by notre dame alumni association https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ moreau week two) he found dr bermea’s story touching. his determination to help his sister and others in similar situations was selfless and inspiring. although alex still had trouble deciphering what he wanted to do outside of college, he, along with many others that knew him, always saw that he loved helping people. he asked himself what classes he was most interested in and what paths they could offer him to help others. he took comfort in the fact that dr. super suggested, “career decision making is a developmental process that spans a person’s entire lifetime.” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development moreau week four) alex knew that he had the ability to try new things and help people in different ways. it went along with his go-with-the-flow attitude. as his life changed, his career could as well. although his path wasn’t set, he knew his willingness to help others would lead him down the right path. although one might find themselves on a path to a life well-lived, all paths eventually end. this is something that alex frequently reminded himself of. although it originally sounds grim, a quote from sister theresa aletheia noble explains the importance of reminding oneself about death, “the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham/sister theresa aletheia noble (nyt) moreau week three) death is a scary topic in modern society. many people try to avoid this fact because it brings them momentary happiness. however, understanding that death awaits us all allows us to make the most of our time spent living. considering we don’t know what happens after death we have to appreciate what we know and what we have right in front of us. because alex acknowledged and accepted this inevitable fact, he was able to step out of his comfort zone to try new things, meet new people, and appreciate the ones already in his life. alex was far from a perfect person. he was his own worst critic in many aspects of life, that’s why it was important for him to be surrounded by people that cared about him. if you knew him, you knew his bond with his parents was extremely strong. alex talked with his parents a lot, especially about his troubles. having his parents and friends to talk with, kept him grounded in reality, but also pushed him to grow and become a better person. coming from the people who knew him best, he was able to realize that he needed to broaden his horizons and try new things. alex always liked knowing things to be certain, however, if he stuck to that way of living he’d miss out on so much. the relationships he formed allowed him to experience new things and built him into the person who many went on to know. (moreau week five) “hope is a humble, hidden seed of life that, with time, will develop into a large tree. it is like some invisible yeast that allows the whole dough to grow, that brings flavor to all aspects of life. and it can do so much, because a tiny flicker of light that feeds on hope is enough to shatter the shield of darkness. a single individual is enough for hope to exist, and that individual can be you. and then there will be another "you," and another ‘you,’ and it turns into an ‘us.’” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by his holiness pope francis (ted) moreau week seven) if alex wanted to be remembered as someone, it would be someone who gave others hope. he never had a set career path or a specific dream, but he had a goal to become a light for someone, especially for those shrouded in darkness. he knew what it was like to be https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript consumed by self-hatred and failure. but just as others did for him, he would do whatever it took to show others the beauty in the world. he would try to make you feel wanted and cared for. he knew each person had their own strengths and weaknesses which made each person beautiful in their own way, and he loved when he was able to see both in full force. he sought unity, respect, and mutual love for others in hopes of a brighter future. if others remembered him for these things, he would have said he had a life well-lived. mary o’connor integration 4 pursuit of a life-well lived: forming my values and identity at notre dame and beyond step 1: mission statement ​​based on the values of connectivity, charity and kindness, i commit myself to a life filled with faith, family and friends. i strive towards creating a more equitable world by working towards solutions to issues i am passionate about and do not stand down in the face of adversity. led by the values instilled in me by my catholic faith, i build my community up by dedicating myself to being a force for the common good. i am able to recognize the needs and passions of others, and use my own gifts and talents to lend a helping hand to those in need. i am dedicated to my family and friends and take time out of my busy life to be present with them and enjoy their company. i find fulfillment in endeavors that challenge me beyond my comfort zone, such as new professional opportunities or chances to try new things. i believe that the way to live a well-lived life is to accept the obstacles thrown in front of me with an attitude of gratitude for the lessons they have taught me. i commit myself to concretely taking advantage of setbacks as opportunities for growth by dedicating time to reflecting on ways i can improve everyday through meditation and silent prayer. i pursue growth and more self-knowledge with each challenge that comes my way. i commit myself to being an active participant in my relationships with god and others. in the midst of a complicated world, i strive to be a force for positive change. using my notre dame education and life experiences, i strive to take advantage of the opportunities i am given and change the lives of others. i aim to embrace the various challenges and setbacks of everyday academic life as ways to grow in my knowledge of how i will contribute to the world. i understand that i have been placed on this earth for a purpose and intend to use my gifts and talents to make a concrete impact, guided by my catholic faith and my family and friends who support me along the way. step 2: integration as reflected in my mission statement, something that i value deeply is taking time to be present not only with myself but with those i care about. however, in the business of our world today where we are able to use technology to be in touch with people at all times, it is even more important to me that i allow myself moments to relax and take time for myself. as pico iyer wisely writes, “the more we can contact others, the more, it sometimes seems, we lose contact with ourselves” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week one). while i value the time i spend with family and friends and appreciate the interconnectedness technology provides, as reflected in my mission statement, i also understand and value the time i get to slow down and reflect, through meditation or silent prayer. as i have adapted to the stress of college, i have taken time to meditate, particularly in the mornings before beginning my day. in starting my day with a few moments of quiet to myself, i feel as though i have filled my own cup and enter the day refreshed and in a calm state. if i am rushing out the door, i will often add a stop at the grotto on my walk to class to spend just a minute or two in silent reflection to prepare me for my day as well as appreciate all of the blessings and experiences i have had over my lifetime. over the next three years, i will continue to embody my mission statement in this way by making it a goal of mine to commit just five to ten minutes each day to silent prayer or meditation. in living out this part of my mission statement i aim to allow myself to be a happier, fuller individual. another value reflected in my mission statement that i aim to develop over my next three years at notre dame is to be a force of positive change in the notre dame community and the world alike. using the example of notre dame icon father hesburgh as a guide, i aim to develop the confidence to stand up for causes i believe in. in the film hesburgh, father hesburgh is quoted saying: “i took a stand for something and i wasn’t going to stop” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). this is just one example of his can-do attitude and commitment to causes he cared about that i wish to embody. in the remainder of my time here at notre dame, i aim to involve myself more deeply in issues i am passionate about and take a stand on issues that matter to me. just this year, i have become an ambassador for earth cups, a brand dedicated to crafting an eco-friendly alternative to solo cups to be used at tailgates and more. through my involvement with earth cups i have been able to spread awareness about the importance of sustainability on campus, and even gotten friends and family members involved and excited about the cause. i aim to further my involvement with earth cups and other organizations in and around campus, such as greennd and the office of sustainability, that commit themselves to similar goals of preserving and protecting the environment specifically in and around campus. in this way, i hope over the next three years to embody the confidence and courage to make change that father hesburgh is emblematic of. another aspect of a life well-lived that i aim to embody is an attitude of appreciation and mature acceptance of challenges and diversions in my life. it is easy to see how over the next three years here at notre dame, not everything will go according to plan. i foresee that some of my interests might change or that academic and personal challenges may come my way. i hope that as i grow in wisdom and knowledge of myself and the world around me, i can handle these challenges with an attitude of gratitude for the new doors they may open. sister alethiea is a great example of someone who took advantage of a changing life path with grace and conviction: “when her longtime boyfriend picked her up from the airport after the trip, she broke up with him and canceled her plans to go to law school. within four years, she was wearing a habit at the convent” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week three). sister aletheia’s willingness to accept new callings and allow new passions to move her is a good example of how i wish to approach my remaining time at notre dame and beyond. just in my short time at notre dame, i have seen how my interests can and will change, and that i must be willing to adapt to this. specifically, in coming to notre dame i was set on doing a business-economics minor in order to provide a more “practical” application to my sociology major. i thought that taking courses in business would be interesting to me, but after registering for multiple courses in economics and related fields, i realized i wasn’t interested in business or economics out of academic curiosity but rather out of a desire to make my major into something i felt more people view as a legitimate career path. after further reflection on this i decided to change paths and do a minor that is truly interesting to me. for me, this took an attitude adjustment from one of practicality and predictability to one that challenged me to be open to new experiences and explore potential academic interests. in making this attitude a part of my mission statement, i hope to allow myself to be open to any diversions on my life path and embrace obstacles with trust in god’s plan for me over the next three years and beyond. moreover, the example of jd kim from the grotto video “five minutes” is another way i wish to embody the courage to overcome obstacles mentioned in my mission statement. jd’s life was forever changed when he became physically disabled, and he has persevered through this seemingly insurmountable challenge and embraced his newly formed life with grace and conviction. jd recounts how he found solace in some of his darkest moments: “i remembered the stories of jesus. i remembered god loving us, and in that moment i prayed to god” (five minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). as mentioned in my mission statement, i have made it a goal of mine to turn to god in times of struggle. although i have never faced a challenge as great as the one that jd faced when he became disabled, i have still had dark moments in my life where i have felt discouraged and wanted to give up. inspired by jd’s courage and conviction, i aim to find god in moments where all hope seems lost. i know that life is going to continue to present me with challenges and setbacks that may seem too large to overcome, but over the next three years i aim to take advantage of opportunities to grow in my relationship with god in good times and in bad, such as through attending mass in my dorm and involving myself in campus ministry activities such as serving as a eucharistic minister and attending the various retreats offered through the campus ministry office as a way to meet new people and further engage in my faith journey. another way that i aim to embody the values articulated in my mission statement is through allowing myself to pursue a career path that fulfills me and brings me joy. in a hyper-competitive academic environment like notre dame, it is easy to feel pressured to enter a field that will provide you with financial stability rather than one that sparks your interest and fills you with intellectual curiosity. the career development center activities from week 4 served as an opportunity for me to examine how i can find a career path that both excites me and provides me with the flexibility to live the life i dream of. particularly, the values i decided on as important to have in my place of work, such as demonstrating my creativity, influencing and leading others and working in a fast-paced environment, were helpful in allowing me to narrow down my potential options for life after graduation. specifically, i aim to embody these values before i enter the professional world through treating my classrooms as places of work, and seeing interactions with other students as opportunities for me to be a leader and think creatively in the fast-paced, intellectually stimulating environment offered here at notre dame. in the next three years, i also hope to take advantage of the career development center’s various services to help prepare me for life after college and the job search process, in order to live out my mission statement’s commitment to pursuing my passions. moreover, the week 5 discernment activity was a way for me to develop the values of my mission statement based on the perceptions of those most important to me. as reflected in my mission statement, i care deeply about staying in close contact with those i love. hearing their opinions on what makes me the happiest person i can be and when they see me at my best was informative as i begin to envision my next three years at notre dame and beyond. the common thread throughout my discernment discussions with my loved ones was that they see me at my best and most motivated when i am involving myself in organizations that work to protect and preserve the environment. their insights encouraged me to get involved with earth cups and have allowed me to seek out ways to be involved with sustainability at notre dame. as a result of these conversations, i have declared a minor in sustainability as well as begun to take a more active role in my membership in the herbivore society on campus. i am to continue to develop my understanding of my passions and interests as i spend my next three years in an environment that encourages and invites pursuit of academic interests, guided by the opinions of those i love as well as my own self-knowledge. as mentioned in my mission statement, i aim to spend the next three years at notre dame trying to find more ways to become involved in building a community that is welcoming and inclusive to everyone who wishes to be a part of it. notre dame is a special place founded in christian values of love and charity, and this presents each individual member of this community with an opportunity but also a challenge to find common ground and communion with those who may differ from us. as pope francis wisely stated, “only by educating people to a true solidarity will we be able to overcome the ‘culture of waste,’ which doesn't concern only food and goods but, first and foremost, the people who are cast aside by our techno-economic systems” (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7). truly, the world we live in today is one that too often is comfortable disregarding the needs and concerns of others. over the next three years at notre dame, i hope to not only become more aware of the various issues impacting those less fortunate than me around the world but also to find ways to become involved in hands-on service in the community of south bend. after participating in the mulch madness event that worked to enrich the south bend community with healthier, richer soil, i have grown in my understanding of the various issues that need to be addressed in south bend and beyond. specifically i was able to see how much of the south bend community’s green space is neglected and in need of maintenance, and also how important it is for a community to have access to healthy green space. as reflected in my mission statement, i am excited to grow in my involvement with making a difference in our community over the next three years, and taking my notre dame education to the next level by using it to make a positive impact even after i leave college. additionally, i aim to use my notre dame education to grow in my ability to bring people together and be a force for the common good in my community. week 9 introduced me to the concept of accompaniment and how it can help me in my work in being a person that brings people together. as steve reifenberg notes, “accompaniment reframes the idea that we’re working to help people “over there,” in recognition of the fact that ‘over there’ and ‘here’ are intertwined. the beauty of using accompaniment is in the blurring of the lines between us and them, doctor and patient, donor and recipient, expert and novice. instead, we are partners, walking together, towards a better future” (teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). truly, accompaniment is a tool i plan on implementing over my remaining time at notre dame to live out my commitment to being a positive influence. i know that over the course of my time at notre dame, i will continue to be pulled in many directions and feel overwhelmed and often too busy to practice accompaniment on a large scale. however, i aim to practice accompaniment in small, everyday actions such as holding the door for someone or smiling at someone i don't know. i also aim to practice accompaniment in larger, more concrete ways like having meaningful conversations about important issues affecting people in our community such as racism and lgbtq+ inclusion. over the semester, i have experienced accompaniment through friends and classmates supporting me while i have been sick, and consistently reaching out to me to see how i am doing and if there is anything they can do. through this experience, i have seen how accompaniment is a great example of how both small and large-scale actions can transform days and even lives, and i aim to incorporate this into the remainder of my time at notre dame and beyond. as reflected in my mission statement, something that i hold dearly to my heart is maintaining healthy and open relationships with those i care about. on notre dame’s campus, there are plenty of opportunities to meet and interact with people of various backgrounds different from mine. just in my first year, i have been able to interact with other students whose lives differ from mine in numerous ways. in order to live out my goal of maintaining healthy and open relationships with others, i must take into account the various disadvantages and injustices that so many have suffered in their lifetimes because of issues of systemic racism. as dr. robin diangelo recounts from his own experiences with issues of systemic racism, “yes, white people can have problems and face barriers, but systematic racism won’t be one of them. this distinction — between individual prejudice and a system of unequal institutionalized racial power — is fundamental” (why it's so hard to talk to white people about racism by dr. robin diangelo moreau fye week 10). as i continue to learn about issues of systemic racism and other injustices of our country and world over the next three years i spend at notre dame as well as encounter other students of different backgrounds, i have made it a goal to be a resource and an ally for those who at times may feel ostracized in our community. specifically, i aim to be greendot trained next fall in order to be better prepared and aware of issues regarding sexual assault on our campus and beyond. this is just one of many resources notre dame offers to students to better understand and be allies for their peers, and i look forward to exploring more of these opportunities over the next three years. on this note, another way in which i aim to form meaningful relationships with others as mentioned in my mission statement is through not shying away from difficult conversations or differences in opinion. our notre dame community is filled with bright minds that all encapsulate different ideas and opinions on various important issues. as i have grown older, i have seen how easy it is to shut out differing viewpoints to remain in the comfort of my own complacent thoughts. but as notre dame students being educated by a mission committed to building global citizens, “we need to keep an eye on our own motives. when we find ourselves discrediting views we disagree with and when we find others around us supporting and encouraging us to do so we need to take a step back and reorient ourselves. we need to ask ourselves whether our picture of our opponents is accurate and well thought out or whether we might be trapped in the feedback loops characteristic of echo chambers” (how to avoid an echo chamber by dr. paul blaschko moreau fye week 11). truly, it is easy to shut out the viewpoints of those who differ from us or disagree with us because they are difficult to hear. in my two theology courses at notre dame, i have seen how many different perspectives people have on things i have always viewed as absolute truths. but through these experiences i have become wary of limiting my capacity for challenging conversations to my own echo chamber that shuts out the opinions of others to remain comfortable with my preconceived notions. in my remaining time at notre dame, i anticipate my beliefs will continue to be challenged and brought into question by other’s conflicting viewpoints. as reflected in my mission statement, i aim to be a force for the common good by accepting challenges to my own ideas with grace and engaging in conversations that may add to my beliefs or grant me a new perspective of important issues confronting our world today. moreover, another way i aim to live out the values reflected in my mission statement over my next three years at notre dame is through taking advantage of being educated to a mission founded in the concrete belief in the inherent dignity of each human being. as reflected in the congregation of the holy cross’s constitution, “the mission is not simple, for the impoverishment we would relieve is not simple. there are networks of privilege, prejudice and power so commonplace that often neither oppressors nor victims are aware of them” (mission by congregation of the holy cross moreau fye week 12). while being at notre dame allows me to explore how i might fulfill my own personal desires and needs in a confusing world, it also allows me to see the various ways in which the world is in need of adjustment. as noted in this constitution, many of the issues confronting our world today do not have a simple, one-step solution. i aim to take advantage of my time here at notre dame over the next three years by not only understanding how i can fulfill my own personal and professional goals, but also how i can contribute to changing the world around me. i hope to use notre dame’s core curriculum to enrich myself in various ways about the issues confronting our world today that i may not fully understand or not even be aware of. i have made it a goal to use the gift of my education at notre dame to better understand the issues contributing to the injustices of today’s world. specifically, i took a course entitled nazi germany, nazi europe this semester to better understand the lasting impacts that the holocaust has had on perpetuating inequality in european countries. i also am going to be taking courses over the next three years in sociology that examine inequality in the united states and how our current social and political structures continue to enforce stereotypes and disadvantages along socioeconomic lines. in this way, i will be able to learn about issues of educational inequality and environmental racism, which are two issues of injustice i am passionate about exploring. overall, my mission statement reflects my commitment to being a person of integrity who is aware and willing to act on the issues confronting today’s world. i know that my four years of college can be a time for me to grow in my wisdom and knowledge of global issues, and i will continue to immerse myself in opportunities to become more aware of the various ways our world needs improvement over the next three years. i also hope to use the next three years to grow in my knowledge of myself, and what exactly it is god is calling me to do in a world full of opportunity. guided by the values of my mission statement, i look forward to taking advantage of the opportunity to grow as an individual over my next three years at notre dame, guided by the values i hold closest to my heart. integration three assignment integration moreau feb. 27, 2022 a life worth to live in my university seminarphilosophy class, we talk about well-being very frequently. we usually determine that a short life, but with many great moments, is better than a long life with dull moments. a balance between pleasure and pain, and by doing any extracurriculars that brings us pleasure can give us a well-lived life. honestly, that topic still gets me confused in that area, but my definition of a life well-lived would be going through experiences that makes you a wiser and healed person. a life where you’ve been through the good, and the bad; you know the type of advice to give when someone asks for your input on something. in order for us to learn about the joys, how to find the pleasure we need to have a “happy life” we have to experience what pain feels like, or sometimes life would put us in positions where we learn how to have hope. the story from dr.kim has given me a reminder how sometimes we need to get stronger, and find hope. that requires a lot of patience, and that is the most difficult part in that process. patience can be a very difficult time for many, but the way dr.kim obtained peace, and found a strategy to find patience and peace was through meditation. due to his accident he has to constantly recline his wheelchair every 15 minutes in order to prevent blood pressure. he takes that time to pray and meditate that gets him closer to that peace and strength he has ( 5 minutes, grottomoreau week 6). it is very difficult to find patience, peace, or any other objective when there are a lot of distractions in our surroundings. to start off with social media on our phones and computers. many can think that the people behind the scenes for companies like google, youtube, https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/ instagram, etc. have better lives than us since they have a well paid job. in all honesty they’re the ones that need to find healthy habits to find their patience/peace. their workplaces are changing the working environment in order to help their workers find their peace,strength, etc. (why we need to slow down our lives,by pico iyermoreau week 1). many worry about the troubles in the world, and how those troubles interfere with our goals and future plans. i think that many aren’t conscious that death is all around us, and that we’re afraid to live our life however we want. coming to notre dame was a big decision for me and my family. it was such exciting news, and such a milestone. no matter how i leave this world i know that many of my friends and family would remember me for being that student leaving the “hood” to one of the most prestigious schools in the country. i know that how i got where i am, is by looking at the positive in the negative. like what sister aletheia says, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness. but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them” (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die, by ruth grahammoreau week 3). i remember when fr. hesburgh, “would move deans, he would move faculty members, he made a change, and he didn’t accept less than excellence. he did a lot of things that people would’ve thought as not priestly, he was entrepreneurial” (hesburgh film, 6:20-6:32, moreau week 2). through his determination fr hesburgh was able to change the image of notre dame since then, and now many across the us know that notre dame is a great school a student can get their education from. this gives me a lot of inspiration to make big goals in my life in order to change a part of the world that can reflect the type of motivation i had when i was young. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/embed.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 obviously, i’m very young (and i barely became of age a few months ago) to understand my motive and purpose in this lifetime. i believe that majors are like schools, where there isn’t a perfect one, but there is one that fulfills all your needs or interests. my parents have told me from the start that they wouldn’t pressure me to pursue a career that i don’t enjoy because the outcome of that is that i won’t succeed in the courses of that major. i do know that many recommend taking a diverse group of courses to explore my interests and skills to help me eventually make a decision on what major to study in. moreau helps with this because they say that, “planning your career is much like planning for a trip. there are many details and decisions to make and it requires a lot of exploration and research. it’s not a one-step process” (navigating your career journey, moreau week 4). college is the time where many try to understand what they’re supposed to do, and basically need to figure out their future in 4 years (i do this many times). a homework assignment that gave me reassurance from moreau is the discernment conversation (discernment conversation, moreau week 5). in that activity i asked my closest friend in my dorm to describe how i deal with my life, and she said that she would always see me in a good mood and that it would be very scary for her if she ever saw me crying or upset. this reminded me how well i hide my feelings (i’m not depressed) from difficult times during the school year. that’s the last thing that makes any life worthwhile, and especially mineit includes a lot of feelings. feelings are like chemistry. if you share them with people around you they can turn out to be your best friends, study buddies, or even develop a crush on them. whenever those relationships develop you would understand the loyalty and respect behind them. where my family is from, “you knew people loved you, but words never brought you to that knowledge. in the barrio, people tell you” ( chapter 8: jurisdiction, moreau week 7). that is something i’ll be https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41060/modules/15742 working on more overall because i want the people around me to know that i was a person who would take action for my choices, and it can show that i was very considerate. : a candle at some point, everyone wonders what will be said about them after their death. i am no different. however, never have i wondered so hard as i did after completing the moreau week 5 curriculum. for the week’s assignment, students were asked to question a loved one about the student’s goals, motivations, and ideals. i talked with my mother. i found i was not happy with all of her answers and began to question whether i was presenting myself the way i wanted to be viewed. to confirm, i followed up with my grandfather. in a lot of ways, his answers were very similar to my mother’s. in the resulting period of self-reflection, i looked both backward and forwards in the moreau curriculum to try to answer the question of how i want to be remembered. like everyone, i know i want to live, as the curriculum states, a “life well-lived”, but to do that, first i have to answer the question of what makes a life well-lived. looking back through the weeks gave me my answer. for week 2, i watched father hesburgh’s documentary. i found that it was easy to list father hesburgh’s friends and say that father hesburgh lived a life well lived because he achieved fame and success. upon reflection, though, i think that is more accurate to say that he lived a life well lived in spite of his fame and success. it is difficult to stay true under the pressure that results from the type of positions father hesburgh occupied, but he shows it’s possible. also for week 2, i had to choose an alumnus awarded a place in nd’s yearly domer dozen. i choose nate alexander who earned his place in 2020’s domer dozen due to his work shortening the time it takes to transfer organs from the donor to the hospital. mr. alexander, with his work, enables the goodwill of others by maximizing the organs a donor is able to give. i personally know the effect of organ donation. mr. alexander is responsible for radical change in the recipients’ quality of life. he gives them hope and, oftentimes, a future. in week 7, i read an excerpt from the book tattoo of the heart. the narrator of tattoo of the heart, g, emphasizes that everyone has the capacity to form bonds with anyone. division between peoples is the result of humanity being blinded by judgment, which takes conscious effort to overcome. knowing someone different from you, the name of their mother and the meal they crave when they cry, overcomes differences, and often just requires close quarters. g is so firm in this that he risks his own life living in-between rival gangs always attempting to bridge the vast divide between men who should be neighbors. looking at the lives of these three men, i began to shape an answer to my question. to live a life well-lived, one must always try their best to enable others through their deeds and to stay true to their ideals. there is more to living a life well-lived. for week 3, i read ruth graham’s article titled, “meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” about sister theresa aletheia noble and her insistence that to live, one must remember they will die. in it, christy wilkens is quoted as stating, “[sister theresa aletheia noble]’s so young and vibrant and joyful and is also reminding us all we’re going to die” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). this is the spirit of sister theresa aletheia noble’s momento mori movement. although the skull imagery may seem harsh, acknowledging the inevitability and spontaneity of your death allows you to live with more passion. it’s human nature to fall into the everyday grind, but living like you will always have tomorrow only leads to regret. this is a lesson i have been forced to learn well. to live a life well-lived, a life in which you are appreciative and grateful and make the most of every moment, you must force yourself to be conscious of the fact that tomorrow is a gift, not a guarantee. this is solidified by dr. jihoon kim of week 6 who was the victim of a paralyzing accident. he views his disability as a constant reminder to be grateful for what he does have. his life is well-lived because he makes the most of what he is given. having succeeded in defining a life well-lived as a life in which one enables others, stays true to their ideals, and remembers they will die, i shifted focus. what would be the observable signs that i lived a well-lived life? the most obvious, in my opinion, is my career decision. week 3 and week 4 of the moreau curriculum concerns discernment. i value sustainability. my dream is a humanity that lives alongside nature, instead of against it. for these reasons, i chose to major in environmental engineering. week 3 challenged my view of my future. students were tasked with reading “three key questions” by fr. himes. i found this article added a dimension i had not previously considered to my major discernment. i want to die in appalachia. it is my home. yet, i had not considered whether my services would be needed. for me, the most obvious observable sign that i lived a well-lived life will be whether i succeed in applying my degree into making my home a better, healthier place. i want to be some small part of positive change. at the present moment, i would write my own eulogy simply. i would describe myself as someone who tried to be a candle. as his holiness pope francis states in ‘why the only future worth building includes everyone’, “each and every one of us can become a bright candle, a reminder that light will overcome darkness, and never the other way around” (‘why the only future worth building includes everyone’ by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week seven). to me, this is the summation of every discovery i have made about the nature of life’s purpose in this essay. if i can be observed as a light in the darkness to even one person, i have accomplished all that i ever dreamed. capstone integration niuafe 4/25/22 the root beliefs that i came here with at notre dame were to pray and never let anything big or small in my journey ruin who i want to be. as an early enrollee, it has been nothing but hard times through these couple months of college. i have run into countless experiences of stressing over-exhausted workouts, understanding lectures, and adjusting to a whole new environment of people. in this first week, i experienced a load of essay assignments that was due at the end of the week and in upcoming weeks. let me remind you that i should still be in high school for the time being. i have never been so challenged in my life of school and football because of the higher demands you are given here. i had questioned myself over and over every day if i was worth being at the university. i just reminded myself that i have come too far to just give up on all the hard work i did to get here. every day i was being tested on my faith and strength to push through the hard obstacles that were given to me. in the first week of moreau, i learned that we live up to stress and we should take the time to focus on relief. such as taking those little moments you have off to reflect on your day and how it can be better. there have been times when i stressed so much on school and football every day because of worrying that one assignment won’t get done or that the next da6 workout is going to kill me. i took notice that reflecting on myself and clearing my mind off of all the stress and release really helped a lot. in the second week, i had learned that hesburgh was a well-respected and reluctant man to get what he wanted. reading his story helped me realize there are no limitations to what you want in life, if you really want it you just work for it. just like in my everyday life i work so hard to be a great student-athlete to learn at a high level and compete on the field. i have been challenged to make sure that my stats class is in the direction of getting what i want to be. that is being a business manager of some sort and leading in a stockbroker industry. if i really want it i will work my but off no matter how hard the stats class is. in the third week of moreau i had found sister alethias's quote outreached of saying “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,” she said. “but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them.” as i read that quote i had been through times of darkness and felt lonely with no way out of it. the beginning of college of me was the darkest for me because of being away from my family for the first time. being away from my family affected the way i was every day and it wasn’t a good effect at all. but fighting my darkness of being away from family only made me stronger as a person and able to see the brighter side of things. in the fifth week, i learned that my mom sees me at my best when i take on challenges that i don’t think i can do. for the fourth week, i have learned that don’t choose a major that doesn’t make you happy. these two weeks are pretty similar to me because i feel like the major i chose does make me happy in the future just not now and that i can get through my major only if i challenge myself. the best way to learn more about myself is a challenge and coming to this university gives me new challenges every day. in the sixth week, i have learned that there are many things that don’t go our way but it is how we are going to act towards with. god gives and provides for those who don’t lose faith in the hard or good times. i have been in those moments of losing sight of faith but god has always provided for me every day. that is being able to do everything i do right now like walking, waking, see, smelling, hearing, tasting, and living. these things many people don’t have so i must be able to be thankful for it all and act with love towards it. in the seventh week, i understood that we are together not on an island. i have put myself in a hard position of not getting help from others when i needed it. such as getting help from my writing and rhetoric professor when i struggle with having a stronger writing skill. as time went i opened up and ask for help from him, in that time i have been able to access my highest strength of writing now. in the ninth week, i learned from fr. gustavo gutierrez that solidarity is to help those who don't have a voice for themselves so they can be heard by everyone. i have been in moments when i was the one who wasnt able to be heard but i was helped by a stranger that is now a good friend of mine in my stats class. he's helped me grow to be the one that was confused and not able to speak upon for help in the class but he encouraged me to. he has shown me to become a greater person to others that go through what i have gone through. the tenth and twelfth weeks were similar cases that i learned, such as the separation of racism in the world. these two things that i learned were very intriguing to me because i grew up with no such racism around and as well of being at the university of notre dame. i say this because i don't think racism isn't born in the world it is taught through the community or persuaded by politics. i am a dark-skinned polynesian but many see me as african american when i hang around anyone of my friends. i walk around and feel like no different from any person i meet every day in this world. people need to see through the skin and know that we all bleed red and we all are born to love not to hate. all in all, my mission is very similar to everything that i have learned here in moreau and i am truly glad that i can relate to all we have learned. work cited graham, r. (2021, may 14). meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die. the new york times. retrieved april 29, 2022, from https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html integration three ryan dufour march 2nd, 2022 morea integration three a word on my friend i am up here today with a heavy heart delivering the eulogy for my longtime friend, ryan dufour. for those of you who knew ryan, you saw that he was an amazing father, husband, and friend. ryan had a great sense of the “larger picture” of life from an unusually young age(“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer-moreau fye week one). he understood the importance of acknowledging that our lives are finite and that we need to live every moment to the fullest. this is contrary to what most people do. in a new york times article, ruth graham writes, “we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness”(“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth graham-moreau fye week three). ryan grasped the importance of keeping his death in mind so that he was reminded to take risks every day. he took risks like going skydiving, running marathons, and going to the ends of the earth for his passion for fishing. ryan was a strong-willed and passionate man. he was an avid catholic throughout his life and he instilled his faith in his children as well. ryan was not afraid to share his opinions on a matter and he stood up for what he believed in. ryan belonged to the “side of decency” and a “fundamental belief in the redeemability of mankind”(“hesburgh”, produced by jerry barca and christine o’malley-moreau fye week two). he treated all people with the same dignity and respect that they deserved. he was a great orator, possessing the ability to articulate complex ideas with ease. he made an impact on the lives of everyone he met and he was a constant source of advice and positivity. his children and grandchildren remember his favorite line when https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146760 something bad happened to them:” every experience shapes you in some way, whether you realize it or not!”(meruelo family center for career development-moreau fye week four). ryan was one of the most mentally strong people that you will ever meet. when the times got tough he was able to just put one foot in front of another and keep moving forward. it took a lot to get to ryan. the only things that could ever get to ryan emotionally were relationship-related, especially with family members. when ryan was already grown up, his mother, patti, found a list of life goals that ryan made for a college course. at the top of the list, it read, “i want lasting relationships”(discernment conversation activity-moreau fye week five). ryan made it his life goal to create strong relationships with as many people as he could, and that started his family. ryan gave everything physically, mentally, and emotionally to his family. his joy stemmed from the happiness of everyone in his family. he never stopped telling his wife that she was the greatest thing that ever happened to him. she and ryan had a special bond. they never lost their love for each other even after over 50 years of marriage. ryan set out every day to provide for her and his family. the only time that i ever saw ryan break down emotionally was when someone in his family was hurting. the first time i ever saw him cry was when his mother died. ryan was in a dark place after both of his parents passed away. they were the world to him. ryan went to his mother with any issue in his life. it is hard to imagine a closer mother-son relationship. at times it seemed that they were more like best friends than anything else. ryan’s relationship with his father was different but just as strong. from a young age, he had amazing respect and a sense of pride for what his father accomplished professionally. also, growing up ryan saw an amazing way that his father treated his mother. ryan wanted to be everything his father was when he grew up. i think the strength of these relationships is why he was so devastated when they were gone. he wanted to play just one more round of golf with his father https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing or hear his mom’s voice one more time. for a few months, ryan was quiet, reserved, irreproachable. he seemed to be in his own head thinking about how he could have spent more time with his parents and been a better son, which is ridiculous because he was a wonderful son. then one day, he came across an article on self-introspection that stated, “the more time that participants spend in introspection the less self-knowledge they have”(“the right way to be introspective(yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich-moreau fye week six). ryan realized that blaming himself and questioning his life decisions wasn’t helping anyone. he made a conscious decision to return to normal life. one of the ways that he did this was by reaffirming his faith in the lord jesus christ. as all of you know, ryan’s faith had always played a major role in his life. especially after he attended the university of notre dame. ryan always turned to his faith in moments of strife in his life. he made his relationship with god one of the integral parts of his existence. in a talk about creating a better world, pope francis states, “when one realizes that life, even in the middle of so many contradictions, is a gift, that love is the source and the meaning of life, how can they withhold their urge to do good to another fellow being?”(“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis-moreau fye week seven). ryan understood that life was a “gift” from god–the greatest gift anyone could ever receive. he thanked god every day for the blessings that he gave him and he set out to make the lives of others better. ryan was truly a one-of-a-kind man. he was fun to be around, compassionate beyond belief, and one of the most intelligent men i have ever met. he used his successes in business to create a better world for so many people. he was creative, passionate, and driven until he passed. he never stopped coming up with ideas of how to change the world. my life is better having https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146950 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/146950 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/modules/items/147011 known him and i know that many people in this room can say the same thing. i can honestly say that the world is a little darker today now that he is gone. in the last few years of his life, ryan told me that he wanted one thing to be said when he died. he told that he saw this quote at a young age and it never left his mind throughout his life. it kept him going every day. “we are never defeated until we give up on god”-ronald reagan. i hope you can keep that quote in mind and live life like ryan. thank you for being here today to celebrate the life of our dear friend, ryan. untitled document moreau capstone nhat 24 april 2022 revealment during the storm “now that i am in college, surely i know everything about myself.” i couldn’t be more wrong. as this semester is getting closer to the end, i realize that i am so lucky to be in three of my six classes. these happen to be god in the good life, moreau and surprisingly my greek literature seminar. i had a difficult semester and found myself learning so much information in a short amount of time. i didn’t realize that with learning new information about the science and world that i would also learn so much about myself. in ggl, i learned about what philosophy i agree with and discussed hot topics with my peers and i really feel like i discovered myself and became comfortable in what i believe in. in moreau, we talked about topics and read articles that made me think and almost took a break from studying and school. the wildcard was my greek literature class. we read a bunch of greek stories and plays and often related it to modern day. between these three classes, i learned a lot about myself and how to live a good life, while moreau was the perfect baseline and start. the first week we talked about practicing self-reflection. i feel like this often goes undone, though it is highly beneficial. i tried to sit in silence at least once a day and not think about school. i often over think about school and push people and things away. this gave me time to myself and helped me focus on my life, and not just my grades. the important thing i learned from the text was really just to slow down and take a breath. things come super quick and it may become overbearing, but i learned to just live in the moment, and just relax. we moved into our inspiration and who we look up to. i had an interesting revelation during this week. i knew that i always looked up to my dad but i never really knew why. i feel like this week i found this out. my dad has always made me super happy and everywhere he goes, he makes everyone happy as well. he is such a good father and i think i aspire to be like him. he works so hard in his work but always makes time for family which i hope to be like when i grow up. i don’t want to get caught up in my work where i lose track of what is important and i feel like my dad has done a great job of this. during “exploring a life well-lived” i discovered what i want to do with my life career wise. i know that i always wanted to go into medicine because i liked helping people and i felt like i could make a direct difference in that field. i was able to take a week to think about what level of medicine i wanted to go into and what would be the best fit for me. i came to the realization that i am going to work hard to do the best i can in school and see where my interests take me. i still don’t know what i am good at or what i want to do but i believe that will come with time. discerning a life well lived was an interesting week. i talked to my mom about what i am and what she sees in me and my future. it was eye opening to get an outside opinion on my life and where it is expected to go. it was hard to hear certain things but on the other hand, it was almost relieving to hear some as well. although i probably won’t do it again because i won’t have a reason to do it, i am glad that i did it once in my life and it gave me some closure. week 6 i reflected on the obstacles in my life and what may be getting in my way of achieving a good life. i found out that most of my obstacles that i am dealing with right now are in my head and i just need to mentally conquer them. this could be due to imposter syndrome that i have been feeling while attending notre dame, but the longer i am here the more i feel like i fit in and belong. this continued into relationships and what makes an important relationship. i realize that i can only succeed as much as the people around me push me to succeed. this is why i try to surround myself with good people that have a clear morality. i am so lucky to be at notre dame where a large percentage of the population are good, honest people that make relationships and friends. suffering is always something that will be present in life. i feel like it is something that makes us truly human. for this reason, i think that suffering is required in a good life as weird as that sounds. suffering allows us to grow and become stronger, and some of the time, learning from our mistakes. we shouldn’t be absolutely distraught with our sufferings but it is ok to be sad and grieve. we can always bounce back and we can’t enjoy the pleasures and highs of life without sometimes being a little sad. in the midst of a culture change in society, people are becoming more comfortable being themselves, in terms of sexuality, gender, etc. in a lot of places, people will become angry and heavily hate people that identify as such due to their own background, religion or politics. in a good life, i think that it is necessary that we are allies and support someone in what they believe. i think that today people are so caught up that we have free speech that we forget to just be a nice and good person. it is ok to maybe disagree, but not to totally hate on someone that they can’t control or their own opinion. week 11 was scary for me, as am i sure it was for everyone. we talked about the echo chamber written about by paul blashco who is also my ggl teacher. this scares me because i don’t want to be in an echo chamber and not know it. who knows how many differing opinions there are and other options to problems that are initially stated? i try to expand my knowledge in the subject by asking questions but because of where i am, i am ignorant to some opinions. i hope to study abroad one semester and gain an opinion outside of the united states. with all of this growth, i learned that i have to have confidence in what i believe in. we have to have courage to do the right thing, whatever you think that is. this goes back to social conformity and having the courage to split from the crowd. it is super easy to just try and blind into the crowd. it takes a lot of courage to speak out against what is wrong. especially for me, i feel like i have a responsibility to speak out against injustice and the marginalized. the mission statement project was an interesting way to finish out the semester. i don’t think it was the most helpful assignment; it was a little cliche. i feel like we are not old enough to say what our mission statement is and we are still planning out our lives. i think it was good planning and optimistic. i guess we did grow in this course but i think it would’ve been cool if we had a mission statement before the semester and then after the semester and see how it has changed. overall, i have a better understanding of what a good life looks like and how i will work towards it. i feel like i still have a long way to go but now i have something to strive for. moreau has been so helpful in my transition into college and has given me a better understanding of who i am and what i believe in. love requires a sacrifice erik oswald moreau first-year experience love requires a sacrifice my three greatest values are inner harmony, close relationships, and the quality of what i take part in. i am at my best when i love myself, love my surroundings, and love what i am doing. i am at my worst when i do not have inner harmony, when i feel unloved, and when i do not like what i am doing. this has been constant throughout my life, but it has become clearer as i continue to experience life independently in college. i want to be a person that can hold myself to the things that i believe in. i want to be a person who does not crack or become wishy-washy under pressure. i want to live with no regret, take pride in what i say and do, and feel loved by those around me. i think achieving joy is the highest good one can pursue in life because once one reaches that state they can free themselves to do what they truly want. my dad is the person that i look up to most, and my mom is the person that makes me feel the most loved. my dad is not intimidated in pressured situations, and he rarely seems to doubt himself. my mom loves others so well and so much, and she holds herself to the highest standards–sometimes to a fault. she is an advocate for a better world tomorrow. i want to embody the best parts of my parents and be comfortable with all of the parts about me(personal mission statement, isaac bernsten–moreau fye week 13). this personal mission statement describes all of the central aspects of how i want to live my life. others would be able to see my mission in action if i am laughing often, being sociable, and working hard at what i am doing. it would be most difficult to implement this mission if i was isolated because my inner harmony is often dependent on companions, my relationships are dependent on my inner harmony, and what i take part in is dependent on both. physical isolation, however, can be a catalyst for personal growth in ways that allow me to build better relationships, pursue more tailored passions, and discover even more about myself. each of the modules this semester has a lesson about how it looks when my mission is succeeding or failing, and they also all have relevance to my time at notre dame. pico iyer was right that we need to slow down our lives, and i think that it applies to all three of my mission statements(why we need to slow down our lives, pico iyer–moreau fye week 1) . slowing down our lives is necessary to finding inner harmony, building friendships, and finding my passion. i have found meditation as a way to achieve inner harmony, spending longer amounts of time with people to build friendships, and choosing pls as a major, a major of thinking and reading, as a way to slow my life down. the hesburgh film was very relevant to pursuing a quality future career. his conscientiousness of the world’s problems and his persistence in solving them is an inspiration for me and for notre dame, and made me realize that i would have to do something to help others, regardless of pay, if i was to be fulfilled(hesburgh, jerry barca and christine o’malley–moreau fye week 2). father himes’s three key questions are, i think, an excellent way to discern one’s path in life, and i think that it applies excellently to the third part of my mission statement. finding what gives me joy, what i am good at, and what is needed of me is the best way to find one’s vocation(three key questions, father himes–moreau fye week 3). i think that i am still figuring out what i am good at and what gives me joy, but i have already started the process by learning that i have loved my csc immersion trips and the leadership and service opportunities they present. in the article by the meruelo center, they write that every experience changes you(navigating your career journey, meruelo center–moreau fye week 4). i have had some https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291?module_item_id=144741 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39695/files/469291?module_item_id=144741 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ good and bad experiences here at notre dame, but i think that i have used them to be a better version of myself. although welcome weekend may have been awkward, it was also essential to me becoming comfortable on campus. it made me realize that i want to be a part of welcome weekend, and now i am on the committee. i think this will allow me to build better relationships with the people on the committee and the freshman, which is important in my mission statement. my discernment conversation with my mom enlightened me as to what inspires me to take part in things and confirmed my values. she observed that i am passionate about questions of “why” rather than one particular issue, which i think is important in determining a career that requires investigation and questions. she also confirmed that i value community, sincerity, and challenge(discernment conversation–moreau fye week 5). this is why i chose pls, because it teaches me how to think rather than what to think, and why i involve myself in the dorm so much, because i appreciate culture and community. there is also a wrong way to be introspective, which i have discovered the hard way in the past. too much introspection, as tasha eurich wrote, can produce the wrong answers and lead to more anxiety and depression(the right way to be introspective, tasha eurich–moreau fye week 6). this article bears a lot of relevance to my mission of inner harmony. rather than trying to pinpoint explanations for different dissonances i have, i let the answers come to me or i talk it out with several trusted friends. and i never burn a bridge, because i always think that there is more to learn about oneself. pope francis proposes a radical view of love, saying that it is only love if it is at the expense of oneself(why the only future worth building includes everyone, pope francis–moreau fye week 7). i think that this is essential to having a healthy relationship. relationships are about the sacrifices, not the easy choices, so i have been trying to be more generous with my https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript time and money with my friends this semester. accompaniment has been crucial in my education because it is the best way in which we learn, as reifenberg learns on his trip in south america(a learning journey together, steven reifenberg–moreau fye week 9). my seminars and immersions this year have been my greatest learning experiences to date, and it was because the learning process was two ways between me and my teachers and peers. this enhanced my personal harmony, relationships, and understanding of what i want to participate in. coming to notre dame was a culture shock in many ways, the most being diversity and wealth. in the huffpost article, the author talks about how disruptions in white people feeling as if they belong in every situation causes them to retreat and avoid conversations about race(why it is so hard to talk to white people about racism, dr. robin diangelo–moreau fye week 10). i felt somewhat disrupted in coming here and seeing a campus dominated by white people and incredible wealth; not as if i did not belong, but as if i was seeing a fantasy world that most people do not live in. this informed my perception about the friendships i was making and what i want to change. i realized that we do not need much to get by, but so many people here and even in lower classes have been convinced that they need more than they do. i want to be a part of a movement to return to simplicity. hersh says in a podcast that although the population seems to be more engaged in politics through words and posts, the participation is much more superficial than ever and is therefore ineffective(https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/, eitan hersh–moreau fye week 11). this article informs my mission statement by making me aware of the tremendous power of action, and the tremendous power of inaction, and how i want to be on the side of change in history with whatever i do. in one of the symposium summaries, it examines the result of the afghanistan war and calls on nations to demilitarize(moment to see, courage to https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/#summaries act, david cortright–moreau fye week 12). demilitarization represents a larger movement of vulnerability that the world needs in order to truly cause peace and universal brotherhood. vulnerability has never been a huge problem of mine; rather, it has been instrumental to my making of friends and my maintenance of my harmony. i hope that whatever career i pursue i am able to show others the benefits of letting others into your life. i think that all of these modules approach the understanding that hard choices and sacrifices can lead to a life well-lived, and they certainly allow me to accomplish and live out my mission statement. love is an attitude that should permeate our lives, as pope francis believes, and the only way to truly do that is to make sacrifices. whatever i do in the future, i hope to embody my mission statement through these purposeful choices. https://provost.nd.edu/about/provosts-initiatives/moment-to-see-courage-to-act/msca-symposium/#summaries integration three the girl who never gave up throughout life, it is common to hear that one should enjoy every moment of life because it goes by fast. it is also common to hear phrases like “enjoy your youth” and “cherish every moment.” while i do agree that life goes by fast and people should enjoy the time that they have, i think it can sometimes give us the false impression that we should not suffer and be mad if we ever have to suffer at all. these past seven weeks made me pause and reflect a lot on the person i strive to be and the obstacles that i have overcome to be where i am now. i realized that suffering is all part of life and one must learn how to react to it to be happier and be a better person all around. i also learned that the career choice that i made when i first came to notre dame is one that i want to keep pursuing and hope to accomplish that goal someday. i hope that when my life comes to an end, i will be happy with all of the goals that i have reached, the experiences i had, and also all the people i have loved and met. i want to be remembered as someone who didn't let the challenges of life deter her from reaching what she truly wanted in life. the question of “how do i define a life well-lived” has grappled with me for a long time. i concluded that living a good life is not determined by how much money one makes or how many challenges people have had to face. i realized that living a good life is determined by how one reacts to the suffering that is present and how much stronger one can come out of these bad situations. one quote that stood out to me was “suffering and death are facts of life; focusing only on the ‘bright and shiny’ is superficial and inauthentic. ‘we try to suppress the thought of death, or escape it, or run away from it because we think that’s where we’ll find happiness,’ she said. ‘but it’s actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them’” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die” by ruth grahammoreau fye week three). i learned that overcoming suffering and sadness and how we react to them is what determines a life well-lived. suffering will always be present but it is how we react to it that makes all the difference. i remember when i first came to campus, i was very heartbroken to be far from home. i missed spending time with my family and being able to have the family dinners that we would have every night. i was especially sad when i was not able to be there for my younger sister’s birthday. although i was very happy to come to notre dame, it was difficult for me because i knew that i would be far from my house and family. i learned that being far from home was a sacrifice that i would have to make and i learned that i did not have to suppress the sadness, but rather find ways to lessen it. this mindset changed my overall college experience because i was able to enjoy spending time with my friends and enjoy going to my classes instead of dwelling on the fact that i would not be home. i still found time to call my family every day and write occasional letters to them. another quote that stood out to me was “god is good and god loves us but the purpose of my life is not about overcoming suffering, it is about how to overcome suffering with god” (“5 minutes” by aria swarrmoreau fye week 6). i thought this quote went well with my idea of living a life well-lived. it is one where we accept the suffering in life but understand that we do not have to endure it all alone. we can always count on god. it is this understanding and reacting to suffering in a positive way that shows one lived a good life. when i lost one of my good family friends to suicide, i was devastated that i would never see her again and had a hard time moving on from the situation since it was the first time i ever had to experience losing someone dear to me. i would feel guilty at times for not doing more for her while she was alive and not giving her as much of my time and attention while she was here. after going to mass and talking to my theology professors and all the support from my family, i learned that i do not have to go through hard times alone and that having other people can help overcome difficult situations. i also learned that suffering has a purpose. it is a way to develop character and grow in faith. one quote that i liked was “there is meaning in suffering, but to understand that you have to first suffer yourself. test your faith, but in the end, i found strength” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malleymoreau fye week 2). i learned the value of community. i realized that a way of knowing that one lived a good life is by noticing all the people that one has to love and support. i learned that having hope is important in looking to the future. this reminded me of another quote that i read, “hope is the virtue of a heart that doesn't lock itself into darkness, that does not dwell on the past, does not simply get by in the present, but can see a tomorrow” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francismoreau fye week 7). another sign of living a good life is being able to look to the future positively without dwelling on the suffering of the past. i was able to overcome the suffering experienced from losing a friend by the great community and support i had and by looking to the future. another question that has grappled with me is the one about how i want to be remembered when my time comes. i want to be remembered as someone who always worked hard for their dreams and someone who never gave up despite their circumstances. i also want to be remembered as someone who loved lots of people and worked hard to help others. because of this, i know that my choice in wanting to go to medical school is important. i know that i want to use the gifts that i have to help others. after having a deep conversation with my mom, she told me, “you value hard work and never give up when you know what your goal is” (“discernment conversation” by yulma rodriguezmoreau fye week 5). she noticed that when i have a major goal to reach, such as going to college, i always put forth my best effort to reach it, which is self-knowledge that was confirmed. this made me happy because i know that i want to be known as someone who never gave up on their dreams. i have always known that i wanted to go to medical school. it has been a dream of mine for as long as i can remember. one quote that i read was “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many parts of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family centermoreau fye week 4). i thought that this quote is an example of one that holds really meaningful insight and truth. i think that it is so easy to get caught up in the idea that we should choose a career path where we will be the most successful and the one that will give us the most economic stability. one should try to get out of that mindset and go for the career choice where they are most happy and the one where their gifts are put to the best use. i know that being a doctor, where i get to help and interact with people, is something that i would enjoy and where my gifts are put to the best use. because of my great desire to go to medical school, i can sometimes stress too much about my grades and focus too much of my time on school. i understand that it is important but it is also important to focus on my mental health. i know that to achieve all the goals that i have, i can’t lose myself. i read this quote that said, “meditation can lower blood pressure, help boost our immune system, and even change the architecture of our brains” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week 1). i know that i used to not take time for myself because i was stressed, but i learned that it is also important to live a little and have fun while making memories. i know from experience that sometimes there is a competition for who is busier and who is always being productive, but i think this shows that it is equally important to relax and take a step back. my roommate and i found a weekend to take a trip to chicago where we were able to explore and go to many restaurants. although i know that studying is important, living a good life is also determined by the experiences made. i know that when i get to the end of my life, i want to have had the chance to be a doctor, but also look back and smile at the great experiences i had. moreau integration 3 integration 3 moreau first-year experience death and all his friends before writing this, i had a chance to read a conversation that varun had with his father during his first year of college. they had transcribed it for a college course but i think the things they spoke about are true even to this day. even though he is no longer with us, varun was first and foremost a people’s person. he naturally got along with most people and he was good at breaking through barriers and interacting with people of all ages and backgrounds. his father was also correct about his off-brand form of resilience, what he saw was an unwillingness to give up despite being hard on himself for failure, which is something he stayed true to his entire life. (discernment conversation activity moreau fye week 5) varun believed in doing what he loved, he would commit whatever it was and do it to the best of his ability. be it college, work, or spending time with his family. when he was doing something he loved he did it better. his philosophy was best characterized by this quote: “it’s really hard to motivate yourself to do well if you’re just not interested in that subject matter or activity, or maybe your skill is lacking so it gets frustrating quickly.” (navigating your career journey by notre dame career development moreau fye week 4). varun firmly stood for doing the things he loved and doing them as well as possible. despite his busy life, balancing a successful career as a consultant and his family one thing varun always made time for was reflection. he only told me this in a conversation closer to his death, but he said reflection was the one thing that kept him focused and motivated. despite this, he claimed that introspection needed to be done correctly. he told me a sotory about a time https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ in college after a physics test how he tried to introspect buddhist scholar tarthang tulku uses an apt analogy: when we introspect, our response is similar to a hungry cat watching mice. we eagerly pounce on whatever “insights” we find without questioning their validity or value.” (the right way to be introspective by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6 ). he told a story about his time in college where he reflected incorrectly after a physics test, and how it lead to him feeling disheartened and lacking the motivation to do anything about it. he said he had to learn how to reflect in order for it to be beneficial to him. another aspect of reflection that varun claimed to be important to him was to take a pause. life is messy, the pace seems to accelerate every week, eventually making it feel like time just races by. varun didn’t let this phase him, he would say: “that’s the reason american football players prefer to go into a huddle rather than just race toward the line of scrimmage.” (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). funnily enough, if not for his notre dame education he wouldn’t have even known what that meant. irony aside, it was at notre dame that he learned the importance of this. he said had he not gone to one of the top institutions in the united states he wouldn’t have been in an environment where that was faced paced enough to need to pause and think about the way his life was going. i think varun’s life could be characterized best by his relationships with other people. he was remembered by his family as a loving father and husband, his friends as loyal and selfless. most of all we remember him as humble. varun believed that "power is like drinking gin on an empty stomach." you feel dizzy, you get drunk, you lose your balance, and you will end up hurting yourself and those around you if you don’t connect your power with humility and tenderness. (why the future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7). he always believed that we best connected with people when we are humble as we https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript have a much more honest platform in which we feel like we can own up to our mistakes and we can move forward rather than choosing unnecessary hills to die on. the most inspiring thing about varun was his approach to opportunity. he would remind all of us that every situation presents a unique opportunity and all we have to do is search for them. his friends and family heard his views on opportunity so much that it became a part of our daily lives. just because one door closes doesn’t mean there are still a bunch of ones still not open. when challenged with adversity i just feel like it’s important to be resilient and take advantage of every opportunity presented to you, even if it’s not the one you were necessarily expecting. (2021 domer dozen honoree: michael hillmer ’17 moreau fye week 2). he spoke these words so frequently in regard to his time at notre dame, and how he felt there was always an opportunity to explore something he was interested in, be it his elective cyber security class or his membership of the formula sae club. at 95 years old, varun was not scared to die. he thought about death as an unfortunate inevitability. at notre dame, he picked up a practice thought up by a nun to help him reflect on his own mortality. “remember your death.” the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future. it can seem radical in an era in which death — until very recently — has become easy to ignore. (nytmeet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). he believed that a lot of the time we find ourselves busy and engrossed in what we are doing and we sometimes fail to see the bigger picture. sometimes we are doing things that we don’t enjoy or aren’t what we want and we hang on to them because it isn’t easy to admit to ourselves that we might have wasted some of our precious time on earth pursuing things that didn’t work https://domerdozen.nd.edu/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html out. he believed in always being a hundred percent truthful to oneself and remembering that life is bigger than any isolated incident that may feel like the entire world. of all the people in the world, you picked me as your best friend varun. your wisdom and friendship have made filled my time on earth with unforgettable moments. your wife and kids will agree, it was wonderful having you in our lives. capstone integration tran 1 nhat nguyen moreau fye 29 april 2022 living out my mission statement my first year as a student at the university of notre dame has given me many opportunities to reflect on who i am as a person and what i value in my life. week thirteen of moreau helped me to put my values into a concise mission statement: i want to be a hardworking and disciplined yet compassionate daughter, friend, coworker, and acquaintance. in my daily life, i am confident and assertive in my actions and choices. i value my confidence because it took years to develop and helps assert my presence as an asian woman who will be working in a white male dominated workforce after i graduate college. confidence helps me to be independent and gives me a sense of pride for what i have accomplished. i seek to be a hard worker as much of my academic and career satisfaction comes from productivity and completing challenging tasks. i strive to be disciplined to remain strong in my faith, value, and belief foundations. remaining disciplined helps me to accomplish my goals and helps me to make the right decisions. having compassion for others aids me in connecting with other people. compassion allows me to form strong relationships and friendships that go on a deeper level. compassion makes me understand other people’s suffering which in turn, helps me to recognize the privileges i have in my life and helps me to appreciate the happy moments in my life. it is easy to forget to have gratitude for small things in life, and i wish to always show gratitude for my life. tran 2 with today’s fast-paced world, it is easy to forget things we take for granted; it is even harder to show gratitude for the things that seem to always be present in our lives like a roof over our heads or food to eat. i, myself, have been guilty of this. for example, i do not realize how lucky i am for my health until i become sick. to show more gratitude for what i have in life, i want to take moments each day to center myself and meditate or pray. as blaise pascal once said, “all the unhappiness of men arises from one simple fact: that they cannot sit quietly in their chamber” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i believe that training myself to have some quiet time each day will allow me to be more mindful and intentional with what goes on in my life. quiet reflection time will help me to focus on and realize the small things in my daily life that i should be grateful for. growing up, my parents have always taught me to be a disciplined person. looking back, i believe that my parents teaching me discipline was to help me become a good person who strives to do the right thing. in my eyes, being disciplined helps me to have a strong foundation for my core values and beliefs. once i have a strong foundation, my daily actions will build off of my foundation, so my actions should, in essence, be good. as i saw and heard in the hesburgh film, father hesburgh lived out his own advice to “always do the right thing” (“hesburgh film” by barca and o’malley moreau fye week two). throughout the next three years and beyond, i wish to be firm and disciplined in my work and values just like father hesburgh was. being firm in my values will help me to not deviate from the right action. dean g. marcus cole notes another reason why my actions should always be good, right, and just: “ while my education and position do not grant me immunity from racial violence, they do place me in a position to do something about it” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). my notre dame https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ tran 3 education places me in a position to know and speak up for the right actions. constantly doing the right thing will not only train my discipline but also train my conscience to think without bias. a large part of my personality and self is being a hard worker. whether i am doing something academically or something for leisure, i want my work to be good. however, as sister aletheia said, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). now, as a college student, i feel like my life is all work, but i do not wish this for the rest of my life. life is short, and if i spend the rest of it working, i will eventually get burnt out. i need and want to incorporate more quiet, interrupted time during the day. one way i can achieve this is setting aside time for reflection and meditation as i have mentioned before. for a long term solution, i want to be more aware of my limits and say “no” more often instead of taking on more work than i can handle. as an eighteen year old college freshman, i am staring my future in the face. there are so many possibilities out there in the world for me to explore. however, i feel that i only have three more years to figure out what i want to do with my life. an idea crafted by dr. donald super has helped me to learn what i should pay attention to when discerning my career: “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible” (“navigating your career journey” by undergraduate career services moreau fye week four). dr. super has shed more light on what i should look for when discerning my career. my career needs to engage all my talents and parts of myself. i strongly agree with this view of a person’s career because if i am doing something that utilizes all parts of myself, i will not get bored or hate what i am doing. week five of moreau asked us https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ tran 4 to complete a discernment talk with someone who knows us well. after speaking with my dad, i learned that being disciplined, independent, and organized were traits that showed through in my personality from an early age. to follow dr. super’s idea, i plan to use these traits in my career discernment. part of my definition of a good life involves faith playing a large role in my life. although i try my best to remember that i am living god’s will, not my own, i do forget that i am not living for myself. i often try to control my frustrations and worries by myself even if they are out of my control. in the future, i want to be more aware of the fact that god is by my side as i go through life. i can give my worries to him because he wants to help and sometimes the worries should not be things i need to worry about. as dr. kim said when telling his story, “i have experienced…many incidents where god will answer my prayers and give me strength” (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week six). it is also easy to forget god’s love for me. i view myself as a straightforward person, so i prefer for things to be directly said or conveyed to me. however, god does not work in this way. “you can’t convince yourself god loves you, but you can ask him to show you” (“growing up gay and catholic” by jacob walsh moreau fye week 10). god more often works through actions. actions speak louder than words and last longer than words. as an only child, i have always wanted companionship aside from my parents, and god blessed me with three best friends during my first year in college. at the end of my life, i want to be known as a compassionate person. i believe that compassion is the common emotion that links every human being. we all crave human interaction and compassion helps to cultivate that interaction and conversation. a quote from tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle clearly illustrates how to become compassionate: “close both eyes; see with the other one” (tattoos on the heart by father greg boyle moreau https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/keep-the-faith/community/reflective-narrative-about-being-gay-and-catholic/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/39639/files/523844?module_item_id=167972 tran 5 fye week seven). to be compassionate means to care and understand another person regardless of background or status in life. when connecting with others, i want to be compassionate and see with the other eye. connecting with other people also requires being open to new ideas and perspectives. for example, with politics, i need to ensure that i do not end up in an echo chamber. as said by eitan hersh, “it seems to me that the way that people are doing politics is much more similar to a hobby than to what i think of with politics, which is, you know, acquiring power” (“passion isn't enough” by hidden brain media moreau fye week eleven). for anything that i try to understand, i want to understand the topic in its entirety. i do not want the topic to get twisted like how politics can be viewed as a hobby instead of something that impacts our daily lives. finally, in my life, i want to be a good daughter. i can do this by accompanying my parents, especially my mom. as professor steve reifenberg said, “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (“teaching accompaniment” by professor steve reifenberg moreau week nine). i highly believe in the value of accompanying people on their journeys. accompaniment does not mean altering the course of someone’s life but being present as a person whom another person can rely on. to help my mom in her journey, i want to be someone she can speak her feelings to and someone she knows is supporting her. utilizing everything i have learned in the moreau first year experience, i hope to live my remaining three college years as a grounded individual. with everything i do, i want my work and actions to be good and a reflection of myself. when i go out into the job force and the real world, i wish to carry all the values and lessons i have learned from notre dame. https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit tran 6 kelton castillo mar 4, 2022 good time not a long time woof i don’t even know how to start this thing…i guess i’m dead. it’s either i’m dead or i’m doing this for my moreau class, chances are i’m still very much alive right now. however, if you are reading this or listening, whichever you are doing is because you are someone i hold dear to me. when i think about my life and what it meant to, or what it means to live a life well live several thoughts come to my mind. for starters, i think of all the people who were by my side in the good times and bad times. in addition to that, i also think of all the good and bad decisions i made throughout my life because i’m not perfect. at the end of the day i’m human, as much as i say i identify as an apple, so i made a lot of mistakes, but i try to learn from them as much as possible. also, i think of my goals, my dreams, and my achievements. i think of where i am now, where i was in the past, and where i want or wanted to be in the future. lastly, i think about whether i died happy or will i die happy and what were the factors that contributed to my happiness might be. i’m going to start this by asking the first question from our week one qqc, but with a little twist to it. did i live a life well lived? i want my eulogy to not only praise me, but i also want those who read my eulogy or hear my eulogy to know the real me, to know that i face struggles, to know that i was not always the happy, optimistic, extroverted person that i seem to be on the outside. there were days when i was down, extremely down, days when i wanted to throw in the towel, and give up. but i’m still here… well at least i was, the day i die it’s not going to be because i threw in the towel, i don’t know what the reason is going to be but i know it’s not going to be because i gave up. i have learned to enjoy the little things. i was practicing mindfulness day by day to learn to not only bring joy to others but also to myself. why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer states, “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture”. that quote from one of our week one readings really speaks to me because it emphasizes the importance of taking things slow and enjoying the little things. i have the opportunity of attending a top institution, well had the opportunity of attending a top institution which is notre dame. nd’s community is amazing. it has influenced me to be a better person to fight for my dreams no matter what. there’s times when i do feel like i’m not doing enough, i mean how can i not feel this way when i’m surrounded by people who are doing great, or seem like they’re doing so much better than me. when there’s people like father hesburgh who as we saw in the film week 2 of moreau has accomplished so much outside and inside this institution. i have a lot of dreams, i have a lot of goals, i have always said that i’m destined for greatness, and i am. i mean, at such a young age i have accomplished so much i made it into a top institution, i have worked along with nfl teams, i have inspire kids, i have help rebuild houses for communities, i have accomplish a variety of things that many people of my age have never accomplish, i never got a chance to do. when i die i want to be remembered as a person who gave back to his community, who always tried to uplift others, and who always was doing something that they were passionate about. it’s sad to say that i think about my death often, think about what will happen afterwards, and what i have done with my life into that moment. an excerpt from the text/audio, meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die , by ruth graham reads, “that is because since 2017, she has made it her mission to revive the practice of memento mori, a latin phrase meaning ‘remember your death’ the concept is to intentionally think about your own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future. it can seem radical in an era in which death until very recently has become easy to ignore”. this line from one of our week 3 moraus stood out to me because it made me feel less bad about thinking about my death. thinking about my death does not have to be a bad thing, it could be an empowering thing, and to me that’s what it is. the way i live my life is in my opinion very rewarding i have grown to be more open more vulnerable and more understanding of certain things that a one point i was too immature to understand. the things that i do allow me to be myself they allow me to express who i am and be the real me. i surround myself with crowds who won judge me for being the real me, which at one point in my life i didn’t do i will try to fit in season think i was broken. and it’s not to say i’m not broken filler we’re all broken in someway however i have learned to embrace my broken pieces and i love them i love me love the group i’m a part of all of the things i do. a line from navigating your career journey by meruelo family center for career development that really spoke to me reads, “the idea is that the best career choices for a person are those that allow him/her to implement as many part of his/her self-concept as possible”. this line resonated with me so much because i feel that as long as what i am doing with my life brings me joy and is fulfilling, it doesn’t matter what i do. obstacles to my greatness because one is not on mine. sometimes although i am a big supporter i tend to be my biggest hater as well, which is very problematic. i got a reflect an order decisions are made from my life, along with all the mistakes i made drama life, and other good things i don’t drown my life. but, reflection can sometimes be pointless. a quote from the right way to be introspective (yes, there's a wrong way) by tasha euric that really spoke to me reads, “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started”. disqu from one of our wig four weeks six readings really spoke to me because it emphasizes my point that no matter how much self reflection you do what is it gonna be pointless. you can reflect as much as you want and still be at point a and never reach palm beach. but that’s not the point the point is that although i experience a lot of hardship, although there’s times when i’m depressed, i’m still here, well at least i was here. but i know that whatever reason whatever the reason for my dad was it was not because i gave up. introl my time on desert i managed to make a lot of people happy, along with myself. so i’ll leave you a final quote from from why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis, from week 7 of moreau, that really stuck with me reads, “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component”. as you live your life aspire to uplift others and to uplift yourself. period. do what makes you happy we love kc capstone integration professor hnatusko moreau fye april 29th 2022 the only constant in life is change people told me that after moving around my whole life i would be ready for college. “it’s just another transition, you already know who you are.” what my well intentioned friends failed to consider is that there are two keys to every situation: the object and the environment. sure, i (the object) wasn’t changing, but the environment was and as i soon learned that it was most definitely going to change me. being thrust into a new world, the things that i traditionally held as core values were suddenly challenged. maybe moving didn’t give me constancy but the one thing that stayed with me was that i learned how to change. this allowed me to tailor my unique mission statement which i have cultivated throughout my life to suit this unique situation. to introduce this paper i would like to define my personal mission statement. i live a life oriented by faith because it gives me an eternal perspective. i am living today for all its worth because i know that there is meaning in the future. as part of this perspective i develop a wide net of deep and lasting relationships that are nurtured by service, because this allows us to help each other move forward. i know that my hopes for the future and the quality of my interactions have only as much potential as i build within myself. to live pursuing an ultimate goal, to be a part of a community, and to give myself in service i first have to nurture my mind, body and spirit to be the best version of myself. moving to notre dame i have had to make changes and adapt to continue to live my mission statement every day. one significant commitment i made immediately once getting to school was to go to church every sunday. i am a member of the church of jesus christ of latter-day saints, and my church is off campus so as a freshman without a car it is difficult to get to. i made this commitment knowing that faith is the most important thing in my life and that i would not be my best if i did not have this faith to believe in and push me forward. i found support in the notre dame community, because even though we may not practice the same beliefs, faith is an integral part of the university evidenced by the mission statement. “in all dimensions of the university, notre dame pursues its objectives through the formation of an authentic human community graced by the spirit of christ” (university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week 13). in all dimensions of my life i pursue faith to promote well being, i accomplished this through commitment to weekly church service. one thing that has been central in my life is community. whether friends, family, church etc. at notre dame, everyone was new. by instinct i sought to build community. this was my application of father boyle’s words “we seek to create loving communities of kinship precisely to counteract mounting lovelessness, racism, and the cultural disparagement that keeps us apart” (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week seven). i figured if i was struggling and lonely, trying to find community, then likely others were too (for even more complex reasons than i may understand). i made extra efforts to reach out even if it wasn’t just for me. in my dorm i volunteered to make mac and cheese which is a sorin tradition for thursday night mass. although i am not catholic and did not attend the mass service i enjoyed seeing people gather together around a meal and socialize as a community. this was my “agape” as father heim puts it the central issue in being a human being, and therefore in being a christian, is what the new testament calls agape – a very particular form of love, a love which is self-gift, a way of giving oneself away to the “other.” (“three key questions” by fr. michael heim moreau fye week three) i used a talent of mine to share with others, and in doing so i also received the gifts of community. being a part of a community requires giving more than you get sometimes and this is very true at notre dame. with all of the tremendous blessings we have here there is a palpable energy to give back. to fulfill this mission i participated in weekly volunteering at la casa de https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/523771?module_item_id=167900 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/41039/files/476425?module_item_id=149885 amistad – a community center program for latino children, youth and adults. i took this step to break out of my school community and engage with people from the south bend area that have completely different walks of life. beforehand i thought i had a grasp of what challenges many latina/os faced and how to help. i was wrong and it took me following dr. robin d’angelo’s advice, “if you are white i urge you to take the first step — let go of your racial certitude and reach for humility” to realize the depth and severity of some of the challenges the latino community face (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo moreau fye week ten). connected to this service was a class that i took about latino literature. this class also gave me an insight into some of the struggles associated with race, language, and ethnicity. some moments or materials in class gave me a similar feeling to when i read dean marcus g. cole say “at that moment, i remember thinking that the most important thing i could do for my sons was to survive the encounter” (“i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by dean g. marcus cole moreau fye week twelve). it is heartbreaking to see on so many levels how human beings suffer with issues that can quite literally mean life or death – and it gave me a wake up call because i don’t have to have these experiences. i took these feelings and used them in my service at la casa, to be a friend first, and a mentor second. i tried to give students an open and safe place to share their feelings, stories, interests, while feeling appreciated for who they are. i tried to follow professor steve reifenbergs accompaniment model when he says “in the accompaniment model, we’re in this together; we’re implicated as partners in the mix, sharing in the complexity and chaos of each other’s lives” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). although maybe we faced different challenges i offered to “walk” with my friends whenever i could. although i was involved in church, active in my dorm, and reaching out in the community i still felt like i wasn’t truly living my mission. in a conversation with my mom i got some insight into why. this came through a moreau activity for a discernment conversation. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit?usp=sharing in the directions it said that “often, others can help us see things we cannot see ourselves. this brief conversation can help you gain a new perspective on your life and, ultimately, help you discover how to develop a vision of a life well-lived that is uniquely aligned with your most authentic self” (“discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week five). i found that in this conversation that i had with my mom that was exactly the case. i have included some of the reactions i had from the conversation as follows, “my mom and i discussed how as we grow and develop we begin to see unique personality traits about ourselves that we will have to continue to work with for the rest of our lives.” over the course of the year i have realized that while i was engaged with others i was neglecting myself. i have learned that for me, studying hard, exercising and taking care of my body, and pursuing hobbies and interests is important. i chose to devote a little bit more time to these activities even though not all are seen as essential. initially, i didn’t know how to fill these gaps so i took the advice of the merulo center as they say “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (“navigating your career journey” by merulo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i jumped into several activities such as sibc, bookstore basketball, and running to engage both academics, health, and personal interest. while these clubs and activities felt superfluous at first, i soon found out they were helping me become a better person. tasha eurich says that “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). as i got involved and worked alongside other students i found out what my true interests, skills, and talents were. i worked on these skills and i became a better partner with sibc, commissioner at bookstore basketball, and so forth. this engagement also helped me improve my studies. similar to pico iyer, i found that “the more time i spend away from my work, the better that work will be” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). with the extra pressure https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ of personal commitments i made extra time and effort to get work and studying done. additionally my engagements helped me through the discernment process. in bookstore basketball, we play so that we can support programs in jamaica. with sibc, i saw how business can be used for good. this encouraged me to select a major or study that has an impact beyond my immediate sphere and benefits humans on a widespread level. i had a revelation similar to adebola giwa who said “as a physician i am able to help my community, but as a scientist i am able to help the world” (“domer dozen 2019 honoree” by adebola giwa moreau fye week two). similarly in my day to day homework, assignments, and tests i now see them as more than just busy work but a means to accomplishing a greater purpose. eitan hersh offers insight into this, albeit from a totally different perspective, making a critique on how political hobbyism is changing the effectiveness of politics. he says “what’s political hobbyism is not whether you think it’s deadly serious or not, it’s whether the emotion is an end in itself or a means to an end” (passion isn’t enough by hidden brain media / eitan hersh moreau fye week eleven). for me the first step is just school, and while i am getting an education to earn money, feel accomplished, and so forth, i see my education as a way in which i can impact lives. whether it’s politics or school, i think we can all think critically like eitan about the things we pour our energy into and what they actually accomplish. through the week 8 integration assignment (moreau fye week eight) and this larger capstone i have had the chance to critically reflect on my experience since being at notre dame: how i have applied my mission statement to the environment and how the environment has shaped the form of my mission statement. while these experiences from this first year now lie in the past, they will be crucial in cultivating the reflective strength that will allow me to carry this mission statement into the future with each new year. however, i know that as the years go by this environment might become comfortable and i may face the challenge of complacency. that is where it is important to dig in and refocus on the objects of my mission statement, god and my community. in those two areas i will never run out of opportunities for service to do or https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s6rrn98f_e0 https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/passion-isnt-enough/ time to spend. i hope that as i pursue a life oriented by faith, defined by community, and supported by service my time at notre dame will be well spent and i may leave with not only a meaningful degree but a meaningful purpose. integration iii conway 1 professor pruitt moreau fye 4 march 2022 living in harmony describing a life well-lived is tough because it differs for every person and changes throughout each individual’s life. i can’t presume to know the ultimate best way to live, i don’t even really know what the best way to live for myself is yet; though, based on my existence thus far, i have come to a conclusion of what that might look like. i believe that a life well-lived is one where a person experiences both inner and outer harmony. i believe that the beginning of this journey starts with building the foundation of the self. the first thing we learn as a kid is how to be kind to others, but in that noble pursuit, we often forget to be good to ourselves. one of the most important life lessons, and also one of the most challenging, is learning to live with yourself. you are, after all, your own companion for the entirety of your life, and the only one with that special relationship. this being said, if you want to live well, then learn to love being yourself. i believe that one of the ways you can do this is by trying to experience all of your emotions as they come. in week vi of moreau, we watched a video about dr. kim, a man who has faced countless, seemingly insurmountable, challenges during his life. one thing i took from his experience is that all emotions are worthy emotions and everything we feel is allowed to be felt (“5 minutes” by grotto moreau fye week six). it is easy to think that your emotions are invalid or that you have no right to be feeling them. the classic “everyone else has it worse” thought is a dangerous and consistent one. even dr. kim, who has genuinely had it worse than many people will ever have it, feels the same way https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 conway 2 sometimes. though, just because others feel doesn’t mean that you can’t and i believe that simply allowing yourself to experience emotions is a major first step in building the self. another important aspect of self-discovery, in my opinion, is learning to just live. we discussed in week i of moreau this semester how fast life can get. with school, extracurriculars, friends, and everything else on our plates, the class agreed that sometimes life is just a lot and that is precisely why we need to slow down from time to time (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). this lesson reminded me of one of the best books i’ve ever read, a little life, by hanya yanagihara. it portrays, in many ways, the radical claim that just being alive is enough. you can work and succeed, find love and a family, or do anything you want. though at the core, just the acts of waking up every morning, taking 22,000 breaths a day, and going to sleep at the end of it prepared to wake up again are worthy of praise. we must learn to be proud of ourselves for the little things as well as the big ones and i think that doing so is the key to the art of living. with this, as i reflected on in the week iv moreau reading, “navigating your career journey,” i also believe that one of the most wonderful things we can learn to do is to really experience life (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). i feel like i’ve said this in so many moreau qqcs but i can’t overstate how important it is to find happiness in the small moments and beauty in the fine details. for example, i had my international relations midterm today and wanted to treat myself, so i got starbucks and, because it was so nice out, went for a small walk. all it was was tea, a blueberry scone, the sun, and the fact that i didn’t need to zipper my jacket, but it was absolutely wonderful. remembering to love the small things is a part of my continually renewing appreciation for life. overall, i believe that a life well-lived is founded on a deep love of self and a true understanding of what it means to just live. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ conway 3 though, i also think that work, especially if in alignment with your passions and used as a vessel to do good, can be an incredible way to live well. it was so inspiring to hear the excitement with which my classmates spoke of their futures during week ii of moreau. everyone seemed so invested in their career journey and it seemed like so many people were truly following their calling. i had a similar experience when i was on the phone with my dad recently. he told me that he could hear the excitement in my voice as i was telling him about what i was learning. this was so good to hear because i haven’t really experienced this since i was younger, and it's nice to have the feeling back. in the movie “hesburgh,” one distinctive theme that i took away was how passionate father hesburgh was about his work and how his dedication was one of the main driving forces of his success (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week two). so many of us want to chase success directly, but maybe simply living with purpose and meaning is a better way to achieve it. my dad had a similar understanding when i talked with him on the phone for the week v moreau assignment. he explained to me that one of the most important tenets of having a good life is to live in a way that would make you proud (“week 5 discernment conversation activity” by pete conway moreau fye week five). you have to be able to take pride in what you do, both at your job and outside of it, because it is your life to own and you deserve to be satisfied with it, to love it, and to cherish it. a major part of this, as i have learned from my parents, is living for others. living for others provides a wondrous added dimension to your life that you cannot experience alone. in all, i think that one of the most impactful moreau readings we did was “three key questions” by father michael himes because it revealed to me what it’s like to really live. fr. himes explained that to live well, we must live until we die (“three key questions” by fr. michael himes moreau fye week three). we must find joy, test our limits, and discover https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/38593/files/470631?module_item_id=145531 conway 4 meaning up until our death and, if we do so, we will be ready for it. i honestly think this is beautiful and i am comforted by the idea that we are meant to grow, mess up, love, hate, work, sleep, and live right up until the moment when we can’t anymore. in summary, i believe that living a life well-lived involves finding internal and external balance by respecting yourself, finding purpose, experiencing life, and cherishing others. now that i’ve discussed what i find important in living a good life, i want to mention how this mindset can, and must be, scaled up. if we can appreciate our existence, our unique life, our purpose, and our value, we must learn to respect that in others. in the week vii moreau assignment, pope francis discussed how we must love everyone and everything with as much depth as we do ourselves (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). it seems so easy, but we have yet to figure it out and people are still being marginalized, disrespected, and forgotten. though, i believe that if we can look past our own lives, apply the love we have fostered for ourselves to others, and consider the complexity of each person’s life in the way we understand our own, then maybe we have a chance at getting along. https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript cultivating a legacy when it comes time for me to depart this world, i don’t want people to be sad. even if it is a sudden or unexpected departure. i want people to celebrate the time i had on earth and be happy that i made an impact on others around me. i want my legacy to live on and continue making an impact on people's lives, which to me, is evidence of a life well-lived. so how will i create a legacy that will affect generations to come? i believe that the most effective way to do this is by forming strong relationships with those i surround myself with. fortunately for me, i have found such amazing friends here at notre dame. i have never been in such a supportive and fun friend group in my life. when i die, i know they will be there. i know they will have such amazing things to say about the time we spent together, the moments i have already shared with them, and our future adventures. i am also very fortunate to have excellent mentors in my life right now. in rotc, the upperclassmen are always around making sure we have all academic and extracurricular resources possible. the battalion gunnery sergeant, a decorated marine with 4 combat deployments to iraq and afghanistan is always around making sure we are on track to be the best leaders possible. when i die, i want to have lived a life of service. giving back to the younger generations just as “gunny” does for me. by doing so, i can create a legacy of leadership that will hopefully impact the future leaders of this nation. what would i do differently if i were to die in one month? i would spend time with my family and closest friends. all i would ask of them is to make sure that my mission in life will be continued, either through them or through one of their children. my mission in life is not unique, but i believe it is important. a mission of service to the country and service to the future generations of leaders. i would be honored if one of my friends opened an mma gym in my name in philadelphia and mentored underprivileged children in philadelphia. i would be happy to depart this world in a month knowing that one of my friends will make sure someone else picks up my mission where i left off. even if that person has not been born yet. my mission can wait, but the sooner it continues, the better. reflecting on how moreau has contributed to my personal development, i have concluded that it forces me to reflect on what i am doing right, and what i could be doing better. week one of moreau, i realized i am most clear-headed when i write my feelings down on paper. physically writing my emotions/problems down on paper helps me organize my thoughts and make a plan on how to fix my problems. i once heard someone say if we can’t do complex math problems without writing things down, how can we deal with emotions which are much more complex than math, without writing things down? for week two of moreau, we reflected on the question “is my desired career path suitable for me?” i wrote a lot in response to this question because my future career is something i am very passionate about, and something that i work towards every day. week two of moreau helped me write my essay to switch from navy rotc to marine rotc. i wrote “there is nothing i want to do more than be a marine corps officer. my desire to serve our country was ignited by the radiant sound of taps played by two marines at my grandfather’s funeral. at the young age of 6, i did not know what branch those highly disciplined service members were from, however, the chills pulsing through my body made it clear to me that i too wanted to wear that same uniform. just now, reflecting on my grandfather's funeral, it has become clear to me that my calling to be a united states marine was planted on the day my grandfather was buried.” week two of moreau had me reflect on what aspects of my personality and character contribute to my desire for a particular career. reflecting on my character attributes and development helped me clearly dictate to the marine officers reviewing my application that i truly wanted to be a marine. week three of moreau had us watch the father hesburgh documentary. the biggest takeaway i had from this documentary was how father hesburgh has such a powerful voice for good and reason. his voice commands respect and trust, i really enjoy listening to him speak. he is a tremendous role model for all people, and having a voice that people trust and appreciate is something i pride myself on. of course, i get carried away sometimes and try to be too funny, but i always do eventually get serious and can offer good advice. but if i don’t know how to give someone advice, i tell them that truthfully and say i do not know the answer to that question. i then offer emotional support and make sure they know that i hear them and i am there for them. week four of moreau i reflected on the quote “if you are in a major you enjoy, you will be more motivated to go to class, get better grades, and overall be happier all of that leads to better post-graduate outcomes.”(link). i am a firm believer in doing what you love and not chasing money. i know that my job after college will not pay very well, but it pays tremendously in life experience and job satisfaction. people with a lot of money are not always rich. people that live a life of purpose and have a positive impact on others are “rich”. they are rich in life fulfillment. which i think is much more important than having a big bank account. week five of moreau i had a conversation with one of my best friends, robert. the biggest takeaway i had from this conversation was the fact that sometimes i let my emotions take over(99% of the time it's anger). he told me that they waited to tell me that our friend lily was sexually harassed by another kid at a party we were all at because he feared that i would seriously hurt the kid. i am fortunate to have a friend like robert that knows me very well. i don’t know what i would do if i had known that night. but moving forward, i am working on taking a few seconds to let my initial emotions subside, then make the best decision that will help me achieve my goals. week 6 of moreau i reflected on the question: “how can i trust in god and move forward after tragic events?” week 6 of moreau, i received news that my friend makai was murdered back home in philadelphia. makai had a great heart and cared for his friends and was taken from this world too soon. i was struggling for a while with the fact that the killers will most likely get away with the murder. but that doesn’t matter. what matters is that his family and friends have faith that he is by god’s side watching over them. an event like this makes me appreciate all the things i have in my life and reinforces the uncertainty of life. week 7 of moreau continued my reflection on the passing of makai. the quote: “this is also, largely, the problem in the groupthink of gangs. they just can’t seem to see one another as residing in the same jurisdiction”(tattoos on the heart) this quote resonated with me because whatever makai could have done to the 3 people that murdered him could not have possibly justified their actions. people need to stop seeing each other as “residing in different jurisdictions” and understand that we are all born with a clean slate and that our environment is what shapes our development. some people are more fortunate than others in regards to the environment we are born into. this is something that helps me be sympathetic towards the actions of others. sometimes it is hard to look past the evil they commit, and sometimes i can’t do it. but that is why i believe in god. god will forgive him should they repent for their sins. 29 april 2022 capstone integration my transition into my first year of college certainly had its ups and downs. week by week i felt like i was changing, shaped by my experiences in the weeks prior. i had some of the best times of my life this first year, but i have also had some of the hardest times as well. softball alone has introduced me to some of my best friends, and the team is often a go-to when i need a pick-me-up. i have struggled with family stuff, and had a little bit of mental struggles as well. however, it is through this that i have found my way back to god. through hard times i have thankfully been able to still find a light. week 10, reading reifenberg’s article, taught me the things it takes to be a good accompagnateu, including solidarity, compassion, and empathy. i realized how important it is to have someone who you can trust, count on, and feel comfortable around especially during this big change into college; i have also realized how important it is to be that person for others. i experienced this most frequently through my older teammates. they are such genuine people, more than willing to help and always looking out for the freshman. after gratefully experiencing their kindness, i can certainly understand the reciprocity aspect of accompaniment. i have always worked to be a friendly face, compassionate, and willing to help without judgment, because if the roles were reversed that is what i would hope for. i’ve been lucky enough to have people like that in my life and i want to be that person for others. i think these characteristics are very similar to those of a good mentor, which we talked about in week 4 in parks’ piece. whether it be my parents, my college coaches, or whoever, the mentors in my life have encouraged me to constantly challenge myself and expected me, not to always succeed, but to give it all i had. when i make mistakes they hold me accountable and expect me to be better, because they know i am better. parks encapsulates what it means to be a mentor in the following quote: “mentors are supportive in a host of ways, including serving as an advocate, a guide to resources, a source of comfort, and sometimes a source of healing”(129). similar to the prior paragraph, i will take what i learned about the importance of mentorship and will work to be that person for others. i strive to be a mentor to my younger sister, and i’ll also commit to being a mentor to the incoming freshman next softball season. i believe it’s so important to pass on the things you have learned to the people who could benefit from that extra help and support. when i think about mentors i connect it to the quality of leadership, reminding me of deresiewicz’s work about reflective leadership from week 7. i like how he uses the terms “thinkers” and “leaders” interchangeably. “leadership means finding a new direction, not simply putting yourself at the front of the herd that's heading toward the cliff”. the term opposes blind conformity and complacency. with the “follower” mentality, we will never get anywhere new. we will never grow. change is healthy, and it takes a true leader to enact it. the main question for this week was “are you becoming comfortable thinking for yourself?”. i think middle school is when i really gained the courage to stand up for myself. i found myself constantly dealing with friend group issues, knowing i was being treated poorly and always feeling excluded. in going through that, i knew i never wanted anyone to feel the way i did. i learned to stand up for myself but also committed to standing up for others. i wanted to be a leader, in that respect. i wanted to be someone who could speak up in difficult situations and who could help those who could not stand up for themselves. week 11 is another area where i think about the idea of standing up for what is right, no matter the cost. the lecture “athletic protests” had to do with the racial protests involving the sports industry. 10 minutes into the lecture, bryant speaks about the influence that athletes can have on a group of people. an immediate example that puts this claim on display is colin kaepernick’s symbolic kneeling during the playing of the national anthem before his football games, which i used as an example in my qqc. discrimination and racism within the sports industry has its own long history, but these issues pile into the bigger picture, discrimination and racism outside the sports industry as well. student athletes can use their platforms to stand up for others, themselves, and for equality. however, bryant also speaks about the risk of speaking out regarding issues like this. bringing back kaepernick, we see that him taking a stand for equality lost him his career. bryant talks about how sports is something that works to bring people together, and so becoming vocal about political/social issues often has consequences. it becomes a difficult situation when standing up for what you believe is right gets you in trouble. do we cave in and “play it safe”? or, do we take the risk to fight for what we believe in? this course has challenged me to think about my future. who am i and who do i want to be? what do i believe in? what do i value? i am reminded of the reading from week 3 by himes. i think father himes’ first question is one of the most important questions that is commonly overlooked and disregarded; “is this a source of joy?”. i think it’s interesting that he uses the term joy rather than happiness, explaining the difference between the two words, a difference i never considered. we as humans yearn for joy, “a genuine rightness of how one lives one’s life”, so it makes sense that this should certainly be a consideration factor regarding your path of life in general. i think that questions 1 and 3 stand out to me the most. question 3, “is this role a genuine service to the people around you, to society at large?”, stands out to me because giving back and helping others is something that has always been a big part of my life. i reflect on this question when thinking about a career path, but also just my day to day actions. to conclude, in week 12 i learned what it means to be wise. i believe wisdom has to do with knowledge, experience, and insight. to me, a wise person is someone who is trustworthy, has good integrity and good judgment. that is what i will strive to be. thank you for everything, father. your class and your kindness has helped me so much this semester. wishing you all the best. integration iii fr. sandberg moreau first-year experience march 4, 2022 reflection is the road to joy there is a crisis of conviction in our world. in this modern, technological society, we are constantly bombarded with distractions of every kind: if we aren’t working our butts off, we’re sitting on them, watching television or eating fast food or looking at social media. i think the term “rat race” describes our world pretty well. most people don’t even bother stopping to ask why they’re running! they avoid all of the really hard but really important questions: “am i doing the right thing with my life? do i believe the things i was taught as a child? what do the words i live by--words like duty, honor, and country--really mean? am i happy?” (deresiewicz 2010). this is especially true for people my age. the phrase “work hard, play hard” is like notre dame’s unofficial motto: students work incredibly hard during the week, rushing to finish their homework as well as making time for chores, activities, clubs, etc., and when the weekend rolls around, they drink until they’ve put the week behind them. in other words, students are either too busy to think or too drunk to think! in the popular imagination, there seems to be this image (less than a stereotype, but definitely a sort of generalization) of the college student as someone who doesn’t really know what they stand for. they go through the motions of college, they work hard and make friends, but they don’t really know where they’re going next; they just go with the flow. there is definitely some truth to this image: william deresiewicz mentions in his book excellent sheep that “many students, perhaps after a year or two spent using college as a treadmill to nowhere, wake up in crisis, not knowing why they have worked so hard” (deresiewicz, 2014). his point was more that students in elite universities have sacrificed their passions for the sake of success, but i think that the words apply here as well. i certainly don’t claim to be above all of that, nor do i say that i’m entirely outside of the rat race. what i do say is that i’ve made a strong effort to pause every now and ask “what’s the point?” i’ve considered my own values and convictions, on my own, in prayer, and certainly within classes such as the moreau first-year experience, and i think that a few of my core convictions can be summarized as follows: i am convinced that there is a god, that existence has meaning, that there is truth. i am convinced that we are meant to be happy—not just cheerful or momentarily satisfied, but truly joyful. i am convinced that nothing in this world can give us that joy, and i am convinced that what can give us that joy is a life of virtue and reflection. i will go through these one by one, and describe how i intend to better understand and follow each one. my first conviction is that god exists. i was raised roman catholic, and today i take my faith very seriously. many people would say that i’m just a sheep, that i’m doing what i was raised to do and that i’ve never really thought critically about questions of religion. but anyone who says something like this is dead wrong: i’ve been thinking critically about my religion for as long as i’ve been able to think. there was a period of time in my early childhood when i completely rejected the idea of god: i was convinced that he was just a myth made up in order to make people behave well, sort of like santa claus. thus, i am wholly unimpressed by adults who arrive at the quasi-marxist conclusion that religion is just a lie designed to control people: i discovered and rejected the idea before i hit puberty. but here, i am not so focused on my catholic faith, or even on god as known by christians. i simply emphasize that there is a creator, and the reason for this is that i refuse to let go of the belief that existence has meaning. and there is no way to hold that belief without being a theist: i fully reject the materialist conception of the universe, because no matter how eloquently it is put, the bottom line is that the universe and everything in it (including you) is a cosmic accident. people comfort themselves by “making their own meaning” out of the things of this world, but this is the saddest lie of all, for reasons that i will discuss later on. but if there is a creator, then there is a design, there is a purpose; if there is a creator, then someone (or at least something) intended for you to exist. it takes courage to hold such a conviction, much more to live in accordance with it. we live in a world that condemns theism as a ridiculous superstition at best, and corrupt dogmatism at worst. but i shall muster up the courage necessary to believe in god; for though theism takes some courage, no amount of courage would allow me to believe in nothing. and for what purpose did that creator intend you? that brings me to my second conviction. the first line of the catechism of the catholic church says “god, infinitely perfect and blessed in himself, in a plan of sheer goodness freely created man to make him share in his own blessed life.” in other words, man is supposed to be joyful! and how is this joy attained? well, we can look at several things. i know that personally, some of the things that make me feel happy are warm summer nights, eating out at a good restaurant, going fishing, looking at the stars, reading books, etc. and on a higher plane than all of that, we can speak of friends and family. i know that some of my happiest memories were of time spent with my friends back home, and as a college student, i have begun to appreciate more and more how much my family means to me. i am really looking forward to seeing my family for easter, and i am already anticipating spending the summer with them. i have been trying to think of creative ways to live out my love for them; i would like to spend some one-on-one time with my siblings, maybe taking joe for a fishing trip or driving to portland with sam. and of course, perhaps one of the most important factors that we can look at in living a happy life is how that life is spent. in his “three key questions,” fr. micheal himes says that this is one of the most important criteria in discerning one’s vocation: does it bring you joy? all of those things make me happy, and happiness is a good thing; but it is not joy. fr. michael distinguishes between the two, saying that “happiness changes from moment to moment, day to day. joy, on the other hand, is much deeper and much more central, it comes from within” (himes, 2014). i agree with this definition, but i disagree with the idea that he connects it to (or at least, i would reject a certain way of understanding the idea). fr. michael claims that in searching for his or her vocation, a person should try to do whatever brings them joy. but i will maintain that in of themselves, none of these things can bring you real joy. you cannot base your joy off of anything in this world, because everything in this world is fleeting and inconstant. the things of this world, even the very best things, will fail you. the stars cannot satisfy your deepest longings forever. there will be fighting and division in your family. and sometimes, no matter what job you work, work is going to suck. i know this from my own memory: every time i have ever tried to fill the god-sized hole in my heart with anything but god, it has ended in pain. romantic relationships, academic achievement, deep friendship—in of themselves, none of these things have ever been able to satisfy me. you cannot root your joy in anything in this world, yet just like happiness, it must be rooted in something. happiness comes and goes because it is rooted in worldly things which come and go; does it not make sense that joy, which is much more permanent, would be rooted in something which does not change? to find that which does not change, we need to look up from the earth into heaven—we must look for god. to root our joy in god, we must come to know and love him; we must live in right relationship with him. and what does it mean to live in right relationship with god? how do we do this? i argue that at the most basic level, a life lived in union with god is a life of prayer, reflection, and virtuous living. fr. himes supports my thought once more, when he defines joy as “the sense of the rightness of the way in which one is living one’s life” (himes 2014), though again, he is more focused on vocations. i could speak at length about virtuous living, but here i will devote my time principally to exploring prayer and especially reflection (seeing as though these are the things that we discussed in class). in “the right way to be introspective,” we hear that “university of sydney psychologist anthony m. grant discovered that people who possess greater insight—which he defines as an intuitive understanding of ourselves—enjoy stronger relationships, a clearer sense of purpose and greater well-being, self-acceptance and happiness” (eurich 2017). it is said that the unexamined life is not worth living, and the old proverb “know thyself” is as relevant today as it was in ancient greece. introspection and prayer go hand in hand, because the one who does not know himself cannot bring himself before god. i once heard a beautiful commentary on genesis 32, in which jacob wrestles with god. when jacob demands a blessing, god asks him his name, and jacob tells him; he gives god the name that defines who he is, the name that means “supplanter.” god hears the name, and gives him a new one: israel. when we bring ourselves before god—when we are completely honest with him—then he is able to transform us, to make us more like himself, and enable us to live a life of virtue, a life of joy. this too i know from experience: my prayer life has grown incredibly over the past five years or so; and i have found that it is in prayer that my faults are exposed. i cannot kneel in http://sydney.edu.au/science/people/anthony.grant.php https://www.sbp-journal.com/index.php/sbp/article/view/1219 peace before god while living a life of unrepentant sin; i am forced to change my life. and truly, my life has been so much happier in these years than it ever was before. god exists, and therefore life has meaning. we are all meant to be joyful. the road to joy is not to be found in the things of this world; even the best things in life, taken by themselves, can never satisfy the deep longing that is inside of us all. what can satisfy that longing is a life lived in union with god, a life of self reflection and honest prayer which will allow god to transform us. these are my convictions; this is the philosophy of life that i have arrived at. knowing these things and being firmly rooted in them, i can live my life, not as a mindless unit in the rat race, but as a man who is living intentionally; and when called upon, i can serve as a genuinely reflective leader. god exists / truth is real mcc we are meant to be happy the students, three key questions mcc this world cannot satisfy mcc live life well the right way to be introspective, quiet leadership thing mcc eulogy moreau week 8 lindsey. word. period. understanding and compassion. in the following words i will unpack my definition of a life well lived, but i also have to remember the bigger picture and forgive myself when i stray from the ideals of my definition. a life well lived is a journey of ups and downs. it’s not just going to be ups. i will struggle and i will fail. but i will also get back up. in week 1 of moreau, when filling out the activity sheet (mcdonald center for wellbeing), i acknowledged both my successes and failures of last semester. and i found that in my moments of failure was when i was able to grow the most, indicating how crucial failure is to a life well lived. i realized i don’t need to be perfect, especially where grades are concerned. i just got my first d on a math test and while i should be feeling badly about myself and my performance, it was actually a bonding experience after the test where everyone was just laughing at how insanely hard it was and it brought me closer with a lot of my classmates. it’s moments like that that i want to remember. now in week 2, we watched the hesburgh film and it got me thinking about theology and what role that plays in a life well lived. i took my first theology class this semester and one of my most memorable takeaways was the emphasis on relationships and how what it means to be human is to be related in love, tying me into week 7 of moreau where we talked about certain relationships that are characteristic of a life well lived. i was always someone who sat in the back of the bus in elementary school. i didn’t talk unless someone initiated the conversation and over time, i have really tried to change that in high school and especially in college, where everyday i have met and engaged with people. that is what i want to be remembered for: my relationships with other people: my friends, family, random people i dab up outside hayes healy and steppan center after a brutal linear algebra test. i never want failure or obsession with my work to get in the way of my relationships and interactions with others. it’s never about the math test. it’s about the people you are taking the math test with, the people you are sharing all nighters with to study, the stress that brings you together, the joy or anger or passion you share when it's over. it’s all about relationships. this is why, as we discussed in week 6, we should not worry about tomorrow and instead live for today. the video we watched about a man who was paralyzed and yet still held onto faith in god. cast into a world of darkness, he found a light. he became a light for others around him. that for me is the epitome of a life well lived. it’s about helping others even when we ourselves are struggling. it’s about using our struggles to make us stronger. without trying to compare struggles, during my first few weeks of this semester one of my best friends back home was hospitalized. it was hard for me to be apart from him, to know that he is thousands of miles away and i felt detached. i worried if he was going to see tomorrow and that kept me from calling and texting him, the fear that it would be the last time, the fear that he wouldn’t pick up the phone. but then i realized that all we can control is today. like the man from the video, we have to rise above our struggles and focus on what’s important: living while we still can, calling our loved ones while we still can. i don’t want sadness or fear to ever hold me back. i want it to push me forward. in week 5, we reflected on a conversation with a loved one about our own identity. i had a conversation with my mom, and our conversation showed that my life has been about more than numbers or grades or what my mile time was. my mom told me her favorite memory of me and it wasn’t an emotional story. it was brief. it was short. but it showed me that i want to be remembered the way my mom sees me. she sees the way i interact with people, the little moments we share and how those little moments are specks on a canvas that paint my identity. it reminded me of the three key questions we discussed in week 3 from the article articulating the path to finding our purpose. when i’m making a big life decision like choosing what college to go to or discerning my major, a huge part of the process was talking to my parents, friends, professors, tennis coach, etc., because they know me in ways i don’t know or see myself in. sometimes i think we need an outside perspective. week 4 of moreau, taking the career quiz, forced me to reflect on and identify aspects of my identity that will help me decide my path. it didn’t just focus on making the most money or doing something that i’m good at but not passionate about. i love electrical engineering but i am also interested in business, politics, and fashion, something i realized while taking one of the muerelo quizzes. gosh darn it i’m a multipotentialite, proud, and ready to attack different fields, disciplines, and passions. in thinking about others, the final question of “does anybody need you to do it” is also incredibly important and a reason why i love notre dame so much, because the school doesn’t just focus on your academic or professional success but also success measured in the way you help others, having both wisdom and courage. lindsey. lindsey. lindsey. lindsey. lindsey. lindsey. when you say your name over and over again, and you start thinking about it, it starts to feel foreign. you start thinking: ok so this combination of syllables is what people think of when they think of me, a person? that’s. weird. it’s weird to think about what a name is and what it means. but names give us a sense of who we are, the communities in which we belong, and our place in the world. they are the first thing someone asks when they meet you. they will be all that’s left when we leave, the names hold the memory of our being. in “the giver”, they chant the person's name all day until it fades out in volume and fades from their minds. i don’t want to fade out. i want to be remembered not for material or academic success but for the memory of me, the memory of my name in the minds and hearts of the people i have touched, the people i have loved. citations "pause for reflection" activity sheet (mcdonald center for wellbeing) moreau fye week 1 "hesburgh" (produced by jerry barca and christine o'malley) moreau fye week 2 "three key questions" (adapted from fr. michael himes)moreau fye week 3 "navigating your career journey” (meruelo family center for career development) moreau fye week 4 “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” (tasha eurich, ted conferences)moreau week 6 "chapter 8: jurisdiction" (fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart) moreau week 6 https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view?usp=sharing https://drive.google.com/file/d/1sdvigbxg1kocptb2vsybfwfylyx9xnco/view?usp=sharing https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145919 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145929 https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145974 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/145974 https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40250/modules/items/168041 owen mcgoldrick integration 3 owen paul mcgoldrick lived a good life. he is remembered as a loyal, kind, and funny son, brother and friend. born in new york city, but raised in west hartford connecticut, owen began his formal education at duffy elementary, continuing on to bristow middle school and eventually graduating from conard high, where he was a member of the concert and pep band, the varsity lacrosse team, the president of habitat for humanity, and the captain of the varsity hockey team. owen was often stuck in his ways, not the best at seeing other’s opinions or ways of doing things. following many warnings from others to slow down in life and put down his phone, owen finally listened, despite his constant stubbornness. after changing the way he saw his life, slowing down, takiung his head out of his phone, he was able to enjoy little thing he had never noticed. owen enjoyed walking through notre dame’s campus (when it was warm out) appreciating where he went to school and taking it in, knowing he only had four years there. spending more time listening and being aware allowed owen’s listening and comprehension abilities to improve dramatically and he was grateful for all those who had tried to convince him of that before. (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) "whatever you value, be committed to it and let nothing distract you from this goal. the uncommitted life, like plato’s unexamined life, is not worth living." this quote from father hesburgh was the way owen hoped he lived his life. rather than floating in the middle, he committed to his goals whatever they were. stretching from playing hockey, to attending the university of notre dame. he was so driven to attend notre dame that he passed on many other acceptances and academic scholarship offers to different schools to accept his admittance into the ‘gateway program’. while quickly shutting his computer after reading the lines, “we regret to inform you that we cannot accept you in the first year class of 2025,” he learned of this opportunity after finally reopening his computer hours later to complete his math homework for the night. spending a year at holy cross college, just across state route 933 from notre dame, his dad’s alma mater and the school and football team he grew up cheering for and visiting since he was born. falling in love with notre dame, he made it his goal to go there and was able to realize it after 4 hard years of high school. this year at holy cross proved to be extremely formative for him. he met a whole new group of friends, something he hadn’t had to do maybe ever, he had to fend for himself for the first time, planning his own schedule, adjusting for things and holding a new level of self-responsibility. (hesburgh by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2) one of owen’s most valued and repeated concepts was one he learned in his first year experience moreau class at notre dame while spending the year at holy cross. after reading an article about a nun who preached “remembering your death”, he took that to heart. he lived his life to the fullest, as if every day was his last, spreading that idea to those around him. encouraging kindness, bravery, and happiness, this changed him for the better. (meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die by new york times moreau fye week 3) following his graduation, owen found his calling. after lots of experimenting in different classes and professions, owen, with a degree in finance finally found a career, he put his talents to good use and was successful in his industry. intending to major in business, but not truly knowing where to take it while heading into college, he had to work extra hard in his classes in order to achieve admittance into the mendoza college of business at notre dame. with the threat of being forced into an economics major on the line, his hard work was rewarded, and he was accepted in mendoza where he learned about what he wanted to do within the college, landing on a decision and sticking with it. (navigating your career journey by the merulo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) for a time, indecision was an issue in owen’s life. not what to do with given options. what to eat, what to wear, where to go. all of these were often overthought. with that came his large issues with procrastination. while they remained in college, their severity was a large issue in high school. owen’s mom, kjeldy, during a conversation with him said that his procrastination was a daily issue of concern for her and one of his biggest issues. (conversation with kjeldy mcgoldrick fye week 5) pushing every assignment to the last possible second, often staying up, losing valuable sleep during exhausting sport seasons in order to get the day’s work done. despite this he was efficient in his work and did put significant effort into it. something owen valued was looking at the positives in things, being optimistic, as dr. jd kim said, “what we can do for others or what we can do already instead of what we cannot do and what we do not have yet.” this idea was one owen held close. he emphasized the importance of knowing your boundaries and understanding what one can or cannot do, and working around that. (5 minutes by aria swarr moreau fye week 6) he also felt strongly about inclusivity and bringing everyone up and together. having been excluded before, owen knew the pain that comes with it. going out of his way to make sure everyone feels like they have a spot and are accepted. not thinking he was above anyone or that anyone was above him, and attempting to spread that message to others. (why the only future worth building includes everyone by pope francis moreau fye week 7) owen is survived by his parents, christopher and kjeldy, his brothers peter and torin mcgoldrick, the rest of his extended family, his friends, and those who loved him. integration 2 brown 1 moreau fye 28 april 2022 penny hnatusko personal mission statement helping my community my personal mission statement is to make others around me smile while trying to achieve high personal goals i set for myself. with this i can change the world around me and make sure i am living the best possible life i can. i think living a great life is very hard to do. are you supposed to only think about yourself and be a complete narcissist? are you only supposed to think about others and fall into a huge spiral where you can't dig yourself out of. well this year with the help of a relationship i was able to figure this out for myself. i was able to figure out that by helping the person or people that i care about the most that i am really helping myself out. there are definitely going to be highs and lows but the total great output and the huge benefit that one benefits from a relationship will be undoubtedly important. looking from an outside perspective we can do this better by looking at our entire life and seeing what we want to accomplish. through pico iyers ted talk we see that “it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (why we need to slow down our lives by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i think that taking a moment to pause and re-evaluate life is so important. sometimes we can really be in the ditches and can only be able to pull ourselves out when we take a minute to look at the situation we are in.through this we are able to grow and benefit from the larger picture. notre dame tries to do this with their mission statement and their ability as a large private university that has a large voice in the academic community. part of their mission statement is “the university prides itself brown 2 on being an environment of teaching and learning that fosters the development in its students of those disciplined habits of mind, body, and spirit that characterize educated, skilled, and free human beings” (university of notre dame mission statement moreau fye week 13). through this and my relationship over this semester i have seen myself become more inclusive to others and be more careful. i think this touches aon something that we need to do as humans more often. many times we are very hateful for no reason whatsoever. this is very important to carry here at my legacy at notre dame and the rest of my life as i hope to be as inclusive as possible. here at notre dame we pride ourselves in “welcome all people, regardless of color, gender, religion, ethnicity, sexual orientation, social or economic class, and nationality, for example, precisely because of christ’s calling to treat others as we desire to be treated” (the spirit of inclusion at notre dame by notre dame by notre dame moreau fye week 10). i also found inclusivity and acted upon my personal mission statement even though i had not created it yet during the blm movement. this included standing up for george flyod (george floyd by marcus cole moreau fye week 12). i think one of my bigger role models to change to be a better person is not only the person who i spend the most time with nor my parents who i look up to do a lot better in. i think a person who would tell me to self improve and is a great role model even though i have never met him is father hesburgh. i know through his walks with mlk and the amazing changes he did at notre dame that he would have benefited me greatly and i want to follow in his steps of inclusion and love of others while still achieving great things in his own life (hesburgh by jerry barca moreau fye week 2). through father hesburgh's actions i have been able to create a better life mission statement for myself and one that i will continue to act upon no matter the circumstances. i will continue to live out my life like this because of something that we read in this class. “everyone dies, their bodies rot, and every face becomes a brown 3 skull (meet the nun who wants to remind that you will die ruth graham moreau fye week 3). by this you have to live your life to the fullest and know what you are about to do with your life. by this you have to know the career field you want to enter and make it your goal to be the best both morally and for others that you can be. i think that is what this moreau class is about how to live your life to the fullest and your career to the fullest alongside helping out the community around us. however this cannot be done unless “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life!” (navigating your career journey by meruelo family center moreau fye week 4). the one thing for me is exploring. without going down a couple different paths to understand going down wrong paths and right ones that fit with you. no one is the exact same so therefore people must try different paths so that they understand each other. irish compass is an easy way to find people who will help you on your path because of the network that notre dame gives (irish compass moreau fye week 5). it directly relates to the issues of living your own personal mission statement. i think that by living my own personal mission statement i have to help others i think a great relationship of this is an example from steve reifenberg where he says:“they did not see their caring for me as a grand gesture of generosity; they simply did, in the moment, what needed to be done. but it wasn’t only when i was sick that they accompanied me” (a learning journey together by steve reifenberg moreau fye week 9). while helping other i do want to help myself as much as possible to live my life and be as happy as possible. being happy for me is following ambitions of mine which include learning spanish and being in a happy relationship. aria swarr's short film 5 minutes reminds me to focus on the things i can control rather than the things that seem to be 'happening to me' for no apparent reason. i'm having a hard time staying motivated in my spanish class right now since i believe brown 4 the curriculum is poorly planned and not conducive to becoming a competent speaker (grotto by aria swarr moreau fye week 6). because i have no influence over it, i'd like to divert my emphasis away from it. i believe it is better for me to concentrate on how i can make the assignments and lessons more beneficial to me in the future, as becoming a spanish scholar has been a lifelong ambition of mine. relationship wise i was able to build a beautiful relationship with friends and more this year and through this i was able to succeed but i will going away for summer and it really scares me. “the gulf too wide and the gap too distant, the walls grow higher, and we forget who we are meant to be to each other” i think this quote from tattoos on the heart show the struggle relationships can be and it doesn't really touch on how meaningful they can be for your life (tattoos on the heart by fr. greg boyle moreau fye week 7). while i have felt this way before and it is very tough in a situation like this it becomes understandable and you must learn not to widen that gap and not to deepen the trench with someone. along with good relationships i have had bad ones and i followed paul blaschko's advice to drop the toxic people in your life because if you don't then it will create problems for you and others (how to avoid an echo chamber by paul blashko moreau fye week 11). by doing this i was able to distance myself from these people and focus on people i wanted to be around, therefore improving those peoples lives and other people's lives. i think it was amazing how this year has changed my life for the better and how moreau while it was only one hour a week was able to make me think about my personal mission statement. capstone integration capstone integration missions for a life well lived my mission is to use my gift and talents to improve the lives of others and to inspire those around me. being successful means to help others to the best of your abilities and to not back down from challenges. similarly, a life well lived is a life that leaves the world a better place than when we entered it. we all face some degree of suffering in our life times and our responses to it can have a major impact on our lives and the lives of others. when encountering suffering, it is important to keep things in perspective and focus on what is really important in life. accompanying others who are struggling can benefit the life of those around us. furthermore, we continue to grow in wisdom throughout our lives, so remaining open to new experiences and to learning new things can help us grow in wisdom. fr. himes talks about how restlessness can propel us forwards in life: “it’s [restlessness] what constantly moves us forward, makes us grow, expands our horizons, and deepens our perceptions. it’s a very healthy, a very important, and a very valuable thing! ” (“three key questions” by fr. michael himesmoreau fye week three). likewise, listening to other people and their different opinions and perspectives can also help us to grow in wisdom. when we only listen to people who think the same way we do, we do not grow in wisdom. according to dr. blaschko “in surrounding ourselves with people who agree with us we’re losing our sense of how someone might reasonably disagree” (“how to avoid echo chambers” by dr. paul blaschko – moreau fye week 11). moreover, wisdom is complemented by courage. wisdom can help us to know what the right thing to do is and courage can give us the strength to do it, even in the face of fear. another important goal in life is to help others. notre dame’s mission statement states, “the aim is to create a sense of human solidarity and concern for the common good that will bear fruit as learning becomes service to justice” (“university of notre dame mission statement” by notre dame – moreau fye week 13). we can also help people by walking with them through their struggles in life. this is called accompaniment. in an essay about accompaniment by prof. steve reifenberg, he writes “look beyond your immediate concerns; show compassion and accompany one another” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by prof. steve reifenberg – moreau fye week 9). sometimes in the effort to help others we can become arrogant. but rather than viewing our help as some great good for the other person we should view ourselves as working together and walking with the other person to a better situation. this idea is also reflected in the constitutions of the congregation of holy cross. in their constitution, they write “our mutual respect and shared undertaking should be a hopeful sign of the kingdom, and they are when others can behold how we love one another” (“constitutions of the congregation of holy cross” by the congregation of holy cross – moreau fye week 12). mutual respect is an essential https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40336/files/475884/download?download_frd=1 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://www.nd.edu/about/mission/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit https://holycrosscongregation.org/holy-cross-resources/constitutions/2-mission/ part of caring for and aiding one another and can help us to better accompany other people through their struggles and difficulties in life. reflecting on our lives can also help us to live a better life. at this point in our lives we are deciding what kind of job we want to have in the future. we also discussed this in greater length during our discernment conversation activities in week 5 of moreau. this can be a difficult decision. but we have to also keep in mind “contrary to popular belief, deciding on a major does not determine the rest of your life” (“navigating your career journey” by the meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). we will be making decisions throughout our lives and we can always choose a different path later in life. also, we are able to help people in different ways so what may be the best use of our talents now may not be the same in the future. in addition, we can use our talent to inspire others to live a life well lived. fr. hesburgh inspired many people throughout his life. he had “an extraordinary ability to reach across lines” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). not only was fr. hesburgh build bridges but he also stood up for what he believed in. another thing we can do is reflect on our lives by taking a moment to slow down. according to picp iyer “to me, the point of sitting still is that it helps you see through the very idea of pushing forward; indeed, it strips you of yourself, as of a coat of armor, by leading you into a place where you’re defined by something larger” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyermoreau fye week one). taking a moment to slow down can help us to gain perspective and insight about ourselves and the course of our lives. this may make it easier for use to determine how our talents can best be used to help those around us. another way to reflect on our lives is to ask “what” questions instead of “why” questions. this is because “why questions can draw us to our limitations; what questions help us see our potential” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). seeing our potential can propel us forward and allow us to achieve more in life than if we focused on our limitations. beyond this, we should also consider our relationship with others. pope francis said in a ted talk “we don’t think about it often, but everything is connected, and we need to restore our connections to a healthy state” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francismoreau fye week seven). growing stronger relationships with those around us can promote a society in which the dignity of every person is recognized. this is in line with the social teachings of the church: “the social teachings of the catholic church promote a society founded on justice and love, in which all persons possess inherent dignity as children of god.” (“the spirit of inclusion at notre dame” by the university of notre dame – moreau fye week 10). strong relationships with those around us can help us to build a society based on justice and love. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://okta.nd.edu/app/universityofnotredame_panopto_1/exk13lykiqnlbws7h357/sso/saml?samlrequest=jzjrb9oweme%2fsut3xmeh67aairvnrwjdvfgf9okc5aiwic%2f1os18%2bznqdd1lvcmsrdpd%2ff%2b%2fo09jda2vi94fzam89ua%2bwi1nbjepvpaqkes4vemshotjfqu0fnhzlf%2fgav5mopmw6becatqzjpkursuihlagvdi%2bhfih4jqlzyuetccye0ku8t8swgyvbzs%2fvb68tyq5x6nxiaktqhuurow90c9dd3%2fgxqb3uksodlyztb53iw6n4yhrz0f9dl8uxzy3d1l%2bw4mqd0qs%2bo6uggvwjdwqjrjsfyoodh2lfa49vth%2b06bwzj9jvtmsfwmsjqir9jxclh6szcct5twj5n12w8tfz82wrqsicaphlrrqo3abcm%2b6gl8p639kb%2b6ta5khonmfscrsehf9h3spxafdfi17brjf9ssiu9cakpclfezovqkw%2bxtilpdduhf1h5ervybs%2fhnbu%2f5o5kpo5x3ixs0lbhv1jhztiy%2b3dpqp4%2faud9pm82vz%2f99t%2fgc%3d&relaystate=%2fpanopto%2fpages%2fviewer.aspx%3fid%3d10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9&sigalg=http%3a%2f%2fwww.w3.org%2f2000%2f09%2fxmldsig%23rsa-sha1&signature=ayxncchfoetr1vzvaitknzoehzzkrj5h5y90b3apcl3cloirl3dhqd4gk%2f2dnpiyqtlilojybbd1rcwdyex1coz4suglgtpg6crrd9bvd3xsq%2fnbgqy%2f%2foqnbvnqmttwl3r9uyyumkbawscc7uakefzmnysenbcjz78exc9%2fwka4vesb0vakvaiwgwnpd%2bytiow6ypfc3tzwnwjr99fvjqoiuifs7fzbix%2f%2bwhkrlndar2rkhg%2fsntexxye1frooiadtbqv8t0oavxnbnd3xrvfttaqwsn9hgm0vvwgimlxup%2bwys1lvqmd15rjoeftsko9fafuzvq4hahig3%2by5kq%3d%3d https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ https://dulac.nd.edu/university-mission-and-vision/spirit-of-inclusion/ moreau fye feb 28 2022 reflecting on a life well lived now that grace’s life has come to an end, it is time to reflect on her life. she truly lived a life well lived. she was a hard worker and always put others before herself. a quote that truly reflected her work ethic can be described by “it’s precisely those who are busiest who need to give themselves a break”. ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer moreau fye week 1) grace was always working hard, trying to stay on top of deadlines and work ahead. while this may sound like it was a positive, for grace this was a detriment to her life for a long time. she would work herself so hard and for so long without taking a break she would burn out. it was not until she began her second semester of freshman year at notre dame did this mindset change. convinced that she was better off just trying to get her work done all at once, it was not until she had a conversation with a friend did she realize how detrimental this was. becoming aware of how her actions affected herself and those around here were key to personal growth. (conversation with a friend, moreau fye week 5) after burning herself out working tirelessly on organic chemistry, calculus, physics, and coding ,she realized it was detrimental to her mental health. a change had to be made. something grace had always done at home was go for walks. she decided to start taking breaks during work to go for walks. the effect taking walks had on her levels of stress made a huge impact on her life. even though she was no longer cranking out her work the way she had been before, she was much happier. this growth represents how her hard work led her to a life well lived. her hard work while in college led her to a meaningful career in pharmaceuticals (or possibly sports journalism now???). she was inspired by the unique careers former notre dame students had, particularly one student who “leads the conception, creation, and promotion of marketing materials while also focusing on design and charity growth.” (domer dozen by matt conaghan moreau fye week 2) however she also learned that “[the career development process] is a dynamic process with movement back and forth between stages.” (navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4) after considering changing majors a few times (and is very much considering it right now) grace learned that the plans she may have had in mind were likely not going to come to fruition. however, while in college grace had discovered how the diversity of her notre dame education allowed her to explore her interest in two completely unrelated fields while still properly preparing her to enter the workforce. the happiness and fulfillment she received from her career and happiness she brought to those around her during her career is just another example of her life well lived. grace was always living her life to the fullest. she knew that she only got one life and she was not going to waste it. always a bit of a pessimist, a quote she resonated with was “the idea is to deliberately take into consideration your personal dying day-after-day, as a method of appreciating the current and specializing in the future.” (meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham moreau fye week 3) while she knew this could be kind of morbid to think about, she thought this quote was important because it reminded us of how precious life is. we only get one life and it is important to live it to its fullest. taking risks even though it may lead to failure (and believe me she failed plenty) is all part of the process. grace knew it was important that she got outside her comfort zone so that at the end of her life she knew she had lived a fulfilling life without regrets. similarly, grace emphasized how this quote would help us appreciate the present. it encourages us to move on from the past and eagerly embrace what lies ahead. grace was never one to dwell on the past. knowing it can not be changed she often moved on quickly from bad situations. for example, while taking organic chemistry grace failed a test. while this would have sent a younger version of herself spiraling, the grace who had grown and learned to accept failure as part of life was able to move on from an unfortunate situation and not let it hold her back. this growth, and her appreciation for the one life she got was further evidence of her life well lived. becoming more self aware was something that led grace to live a well lived life. as someone who always tried to live a humble life, self awareness of her strengths was not something grace was very familiar with. however, personal growth changed this. resonating with the quote, “if we’re not self-aware, it’s almost impossible to master the skills that make us stronger team players, superior leaders and better relationship builders, either at work or in the rest of our lives.” (the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way) by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6) she thought this quote was very important because she believed that oftentimes people thought that they needed to have a strong awareness of their weaknesses. while she knew that was true. grace learned it was also important that we are aware of our strengths. this allowed her to build better relationships with those around her along with being more successful in our day to day lives because we will be able to identify what we are good at and use it to improve the lives of others. realizing her passions and capitalizing on her strengths grace was able to positively impact people through her career as a sports journalist (or chemical engineer) and live a life well lived. finally, the relationships grace formed was evidence of her life well lived. she always aimed to surround herself with people who made her happy, and who she could return the favor for. having a meaningful relationship with the people around her allowed her to realize “happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component.” (why the only future worth building includes everyone” by his holiness pope francis moreau fye week 7) grace discovered happiness in the people she surrounded herself with. not only did she prioritize her own happiness but also the happiness of those in her life. this made her a dependable friend and reflected her well lived life. i hope one day i can live as meaningful and fulfilling a life as grace did. integration 3 ortiz bautista 1 eulogy of a life "kind, smart, gentle, well-mannered, funny, great brother, friend, confident, strong-willed, great son, amazing father, great husband. rey was all of these, but he always felt sad not having done all he could to help others. he did his best to be there for others, which is why we loved him so much. or why cried without end. he helped all of us here in a certain way. he may have been burdened by that or had to make many sacrifices for the sake of others. even so, rey always smiled. his goal was to be happy only when everyone around him was happy. rey always hated seeing people sad. he wanted to help others and relieve their pain. he valued human relationships, whether shared with friends, family, lovers, or strangers. rey appreciated respect. those who gave it will receive it. rey wanted to make a difference, especially within the hearts and minds of people. that was his goal. he wanted to be a role model for those who knew him. rey wanted people to get along and give people hope for a better world. rey influenced those around him and wanted them to better themselves and others. rey did all the things he set out to do. truthfully, rey was an inspiration. thank you, everyone, for hearing me out, simon li, his best friend. i knew rey the best. he was the most respectable person i knew. may he rest in peace." that about sums up what i want my eulogy to sound like. a little cliche, no? i think it is pretty accurate considering the life i want to live. to me, a life well-lived contains three valuable aspects: love for others, growth of mind and heart, and deep connections. in week 3 of moreau, we read an article about a nun called sister theresa aletheia noble. she stated that it is “actually in facing the darkest realities of life that we find light in them (“meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die"by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). this quote struck out because the darkest reality of life is the inevitability of death, sickness, and aging. being a https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html ortiz bautista 2 witness to the death of my grandpa; losing the other, and facing numerous sicknesses within the family, this harsh truth is ever-so daunting. however, it correspondingly establishes a sense of urgency for us all. our end is uncertain, no matter how much we attempt to plan or avoid it. therefore, people need to live an amazing life before their time ends, whenever that may be. acknowledging that fact, my notion of a good life resides in the companionship i hope to make while flourishing in mind, spirit, and body. whether those friends are the special ones made from notre dame or the ones i will have fateful encounters with in the future, i will be ready. in a video of week 6 of moreau, an interviewee named jihoon was asked, “why does god allow suffering?” to which he replies, “suffering is a part of our lives. it is always there, but it is about how to respond to suffering from god” that makes life what it is (“5 minutes” a grotto story by aria swatt moreau fye week 6). that statement is thought-provoking. for one, it indicates that the love and faith of god are essential to living a good life. and for another, life is filled with suffering that we must all face. this relates to sister theresa's view that in darkness we will find the light. comparing the two, to live a good life, one must experience hardships but not alone. and further, being religious, my faith in god has been my compass throughout hardships and joy. forsaking this sacred relationship will be detrimental. so having a union with god is necessary. nevertheless, building deep relationships with friends and family will allow one to not only triumph over suffering but live a happy life. therefore, it is imperative that to live a life well-lived, one must love others to foster profound connections with people who will be the light to one's darkness and aid one in attaining treasured joys. moreover, in his ted talk, pico lyer presents that “the need for a space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico lyer moreau fye week 1). https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ ortiz bautista 3 through this, the belief that taking a break in one's life-vacation, meditation, going out with friends, sleeping-would be a sign of living a good life. this simple and small act is critical. it allows one to recover, enabling the mind, body, and soul to feel less burden and reset a stressed mood to positive well-being. but more importantly, it helps to reflect on our character, actions, behaviors, virtues, and goals. like reverend theodore m. hesburgh puts it, “it’s impossible to have a complete and honest human story if one doesn’t speak of human failings as well as human successes” (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). knowing our failures and successes, whether physical, emotional, or mental, enables us to have an extensive perception of who we are and what we are doing. as a result, we can plan out what we wish to accomplish while simultaneously leading to our personal growth. due to that, i believe that personal development is a principal attribute of living a good life. having faced many afflictions in life and overcoming every step of it, i not only won over the adversary but grew from it. ven pope francis agrees. admiring the phrase, “the future you,” he asserts that “while looking at tomorrow, it invites us to open a dialogue today” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). questioning who we are and who we want to become fundamentally permits us to set life goals and define the meaning of a life well-lived. that said, i believe that flourishing in mind, faith, spirit, and body are essential to living a life well-lived. in consequence, seeing our successes in these parts are signals of living a life well-lived. ultimately, i want the last chapter of my life to be defined by my love for others, my desire to grow to my best self, and my value of deep relationships with others. although “planning your career is much like planning for a trip” (“navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4), or that planning life is https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/35977/modules/items/146887 https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ ortiz bautista 4 that simple, i do not believe that to be true. life is unpredictable. countless factors must be considered, before making a decision. however, what would help is to know who we are and what we value. week 5 of moreau asked us to hold a discernment conversation activity with someone we trust. for me, it was my best friend simon li. in this discernment conversation activity, he said that i “lack one true self." because of that, i reflected on what he meant. i determined that he suggested that if i do not know myself, i cannot live my own life or even a good life at that. i find this to be true. i honestly do not know who i am. i also do not know what i want to be. notre dame will help me solve these two dilemmas. therefore, i will strive to create one true self in life. that is one of the meanings i have for living a life well-lived. in addition, i wish to establish deep relationships with people and thus love for others. that being the definition of a life well-lived, achieving these aspects will indicate having lived a happy and good life. finally, i want to be regarded as a person who treasured those around himself, trying to better himself every day and improving the lives of others while having love and respect for all. thank you. moreau w8 s2 integration moreau fye 4 march 2022 taking abby’s life as an inspiration to live a life well-lived rest in peace . abby was a freshman at the university of notre dame studying psychology. let’s be honest though, we all know she actually had no clue what she wanted to do with her life. she was such a lively and healthy girl, but all of the sudden she perished. three short weeks ago, abby was working on her moreau first year experience assignment with her dear friend, francesca. the assignment was to have a deep conversation with somebody in your life. the final question of the assignment was “what is something that is difficult to say but important for me to hear” (“discerning a life well-lived discernment conversation activity” moreau fye week 5)? the discussion between the two girls was going well up until this point. the two shared their responses to the question, but failed to account for the feelings of the other girl. the two left this conversation deeply hurt and angry with one another. as the next two weeks went on, anyone and everyone could sense the tension between abby and francesca, though they tried their best to remain cordial. their feelings of hate towards each other immediately resurfaced when their epic mario kart tournament rolled around. they, along with two other friends, raced all 32 courses at once to determine the ultimate mario kart champion. abby and francesca, both mario kart experts, were neck and neck the entire time. as the final race approached, the two girls were tied. as abby cruised in first the entire “rainbow https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit road” race, francesca tried her hardest to catch up. as abby approached the finish line, francesca threw a blue shell. this blue shell exploded abby, allowing francesca to win first in this race, and in the whole tournament. abby was furious. the mutual anger the girls had for each other resurfaced. they began aggressively fist fighting. their other friends tried to separate the two, but they were not successful. eventually the fight escalated so much that they approached the fourth floor farley that had been left open due to the extreme radiator temperatures. unaware of their location in the room, both francesca and abby, still brawling, broke through the window screen and plunged to their deaths in the farley parking lot. may they, more so abby, rest in peace. though abby’s death was sudden and shocking, abby would not want us to dwell on this. abby loved her life and she loved trying to get everything out of every moment possible. if there was down time, abby was spending it trying to find something fun to do. she lived closely by her motto “yolo.” sister theresa aletheia noble, nun at the daughters of st. paul convent, saw life in a similar way. not only did she live every moment of her life to the fullest, but she stretched it even further to go as far as to actively not fear death. she says, “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” new york times moreau fye week 3). sister aletheia lives her life differently than most because she accepts that life is finite and has an end. abby, if she was still here, would echo this sentiment. life is a precious gift that we have been given. in order to live our gift of life to the fullest, we need to accept that death can come at any moment, and instead of fearing and ignoring it, we should strive to have lived a fulfilling life by the time death rolls around. https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html abby loved her life dearly, but that does not mean her life was perfect. in actuality, no matter how it may appear, nobody’s life is ever perfect. with an increase in social media usage, often we see cherry picked versions of influencers’ lives that indicate to us that they face no hardships. hardships challenge us greatly, but they can lead to positive outcomes. father hesburgh reflects on the hardships of life by saying, “in my faith you learn there’s meaning in suffering but to truly understand that you have to first suffer yourself. it tests your faith but in the end you find strength” (“hesburgh” film by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). father hesburgh means to say that once you get past your challenges, you come out the other side a changed and strengthened person. suffering varies from person to person in terms of severity, but nevertheless, everyone has problems that they face, no matter how minor. dr. jihoon kim, following a life altering snowboarding incident, offers us this insight. “life is full of unexpected things. it could come and go anytime, and when hardships or unexpected things happen to us, we often focus on the things that we do not have” (“five minutes” grotto network moreau fye week 6). kim goes one step further than father hesburgh, urging us to not dwell on the bad when faced with obstacles. instead, to live a life well-lived, you must see the good in every situation and use every obstacle as an opportunity for growth. abby faced the challenge of moving consistently every 3 years as a child, constantly having to make new friends. it was hard for her growing up that way, but she was able to overcome this experience and come out the other side being better at making friends and adapting to new environments. another challenge abby faced while she had to repeatedly make new friends at a brand new school was staying true to herself. sometimes it is tempting to mold yourself so that others like you more, or out of fear you will have no friends, you try to change your personality. this is https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 https://grottonetwork.com/make-an-impact/transform/why-does-god-allow-suffering/?utm_source=moreau&utm_medium=class&utm_campaign=spring_2022 the wrong way to live a life well-lived. instead you should be true to yourself. pic iyer tells us, “they were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). this applies directly to abby’s first few weeks starting college at notre dame. she was able to take her experiences as a youth, learn from them, and then come into college truly being herself. everybody has an idea in their head of who they want to be and sometimes it is hard to distinguish where the line is between wanting to be somebody who is not authentically yourself and just innocently wanting to better yourself. we all have characteristics that we don’t love about ourselves, but abby would remind us that when starting fresh at a new place it is crucial, even though it may feel lonely or uncomfortable, to remember who you are and not let anything change that just because you want to be more comfortable. one of the reason’s abby would define her life as “well-lived,” if she was still here today, is her large amount of meaningful relationships. abby loved being with people, whether they be her family or friends. pope francis gives his insights of relationships when he says, “i would love it if this meeting could help to remind us that we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent “i,” separated from each other, and we can only build the future by standing together” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” pope francis moreau fye week 7). in modern society, sometimes we place too much emphasis on independent progress and competition. pope francis argues instead that it is much more beneficial to instead rely on others and work together. you can’t do everything alone, and if you do, you will be miserable. if you want to live a happy and purposeful life, you can only do that with meaningful collaborations and relationships with others. https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript as i come to a close, i want to leave you with the following thoughts. abby’s life, though brief, demonstrated a live-well lived through her overcoming of challenges, staying true to her identity, and being an active participant in meaningful relationships. she wants to be remembered for these things. once again echoing her favoring saying., “yolo,” she would want everyone here to live by the following quote on the meurolo career development website. it reads, “the only way to know more about yourself is to test the waters just get out and experience life” (“navigating your career journey” meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week 4). life is short and you never know when it will come to an end. additionally, the world is a huge place full of opportunities waiting for you to take advantage of them. if you learn one thing from abby’s life, it should be that you should make the most of your life, connecting with other people and overcoming any obstacles you may face. instead of fearing death, you should spend your time making your life as well-lived as possible. https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ microsoft word week 8integration 3.docx moreau integration three how will others think of me? defining a life well-lived when we investigate a life-well lived, we first must question what that means. in father michael himes three key question, himes reflects on these words by poet marianne moore, “satisfaction is a lowly thing. how pure a thing is joy” (“three key questions” by father michael himes – moreau fye week three). i think the main inquiry in evaluating a life welllived is examining what brings us joy. music, hanging out with friends, accomplishing tasks, and many other things bring me joy. maybe maximizing a life well-lived means maximizing on those things that bring you joy. when i was interviewing my irish compass mentor, he remarked, “i love my job because it brings me joy. there is always something more to do” (“week five irish compass activity” – moreau fye week five). living a life-well lived includes being passionate about your career and choices as an adult as well. after investigating a life well-lived, we must pursue that life. pope francis emphasizes the urgency of our time here on earth: “life is not merely passing by, life is about interactions” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis – moreau fye week seven). i must stay active in pursuing my passions, even when i feel discouraged or lack the motivation to. even if this means taking 15 minutes to practice some piano or shooting a quick text to my friend, staying active in the things that bring me joy define a life-well lived. one of the most active things in my life right now is finding a career path. as the meruelo family center of career development puts it, “it is a dynamic process with movement back and forth between stages” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by the meruelo family center of career development – moreau week four). i feel like i shift back and forth between stages of my career pursuit. at one moment i feel strongly about a certain career choice, but at other times i doubt myself. living a life well-lived come with challenges like this. in his video essay, aria swarr reflects on his obstacles: “i was always so focused on what i cannot do. i complained that i couldn’t move my fingers, i couldn’t move my legs. but then i began to realize that some of the things that i can do, the movements that i have already, can be a blessing for some others” (“5 minutes” by aria swarr – moreau week six). another element of living a life well-lived is having gratitude. having gratitude makes it easier to have compassion and sympathy for others who don’t have the same privileges as you. we all must reflect on the positives in our lives and thank those that make those positives happen. finally, i need to assess the performance of my life well-lived. in the words of pico iyer, “the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer – moreau week one). meditation and prayer are great places where i can find inner peace and reflect on my life. part of this assessment also includes identifying those who have helped you live a life well-lived. in particular, the hesburgh film has inspired me to find compromises. in the hesburgh film, father hesburgh simultaneously shows indifference to the vietnam conflict while controlling student protests (“hesburgh” by jerry barca and christine o’malley – moreau week two). living a life well-lived includes forging relationships even when there are differences. eulogy “good morning my friends. the large crowd ahead of me indicates the man joey was and the number of lives he impacted. one of the most interesting things i found about joey was his vigor and tenacity in pursuing his passions, and he had a lot of passions. joey pursued a wide range of passions; he played many sports, enjoyed singing, and remained steadfast in his catholic faith. i like to think joey did all these things because he was a personable guy. he was selfless in every aspect of his life, and he was always putting others before himself. joey was also an amazing family man. before all else, joey’s primary job was to be a loving husband and father. he raised four beautiful children and was married for 55 years to his lovely wife. from coaching youth sports to driving them to church on sunday, joey stayed active in his children’s lives and interests. i think many of joey’s qualities are reflected in his children. all of joey’s children are smart, diligent, compassionate, and trustworthy. joey always checked in on his siblings and parents. he was the master of small acts. even if it were just a simple phone call, joey was making sure all was alright in his family. as a catholic, joey was a faithful disciple of christ whose faith ran much deeper than just weekly mass. joey would lead his local parish in rosaries and faith formation. he cantored for his parish as well. a lot of joey’s faith is also reflected in his good works. joey was a firm believer that everyone held human dignity. joey served in soup kitchens and donated to other charitable causes. he would not just simply serve and say have a good day. when he served the homeless, joey invited the poor into conversation. he was always trying to gain insights from people who had different experiences from him. in addition, joey was hardworking and boasted a strong work ethic. he worked right up until his untimely death. joey was always a delight to his coworkers. he was an expert collaborator and consultant. joey loved to think critically. from his years in the it management sector, joey became an amazing problem solver and a reliable teammate. he made the job fun by cracking jokes and lightening the mood when work got stressful. as i wrap up things, i just want to quickly remark on the incredible legacy joey has left behind. he was a role model for so many people in his life. he truly was a renaissance man as well. in the words of his favorite saint, saint maximillian kolbe, joey believed that ‘the most deadly poison of our time is indifference.’ i think these words accurately describe the dynamic, loving, and compassionate nature of the late . thank you all for listening and god bless every one of you!” integration 3professor harrington integration 3: eulogy 3/3/22 ’ eulogy: faith, work, and friendship wow. i have already completed 3/4th of my freshman year at notre dame. this past half semester has flown by, faster than any half semester in my entire academic career. the old, and often overused, adage rings true, “time flies, when you’re having fun”. although this half semester has been filled with triumphs and jubilation, moreau has reminded me of my end fate. for instance, in week 3 moreau, we read ruth graham’s article that discusses sister aletheia, a nun obsessed with death. one of sister aletheia's admirers, christy wilkins states, “she’s so young and vibrant and joyful and is also reminding us all we’re going to die” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week 3). even though i have recently been filled with such elation, this article helped ground my senses. sister alethia herself also embodies this youthful energy, but simultaneously asks us to understand our impending deaths. with this in mind, i hope to write a heartfelt eulogy of my life, surrounding some of my core beliefs, or at least things i hope become my core beliefs. andrew was a man who balanced his faith and his career. he never let his busy work life interfere with his faithfulness or the precious time he spent with his children. every sunday he attended church with his family, no matter the circumstances. this message is best reiterated in pico iyer’s article which states, “this is what the principle of the sabbath enshrines. it is, as abraham joshua heschel, the great jewish theologian of the last century, had it, ‘a cathedral in time rather than in space’; the one day a week we take off becomes a vast empty space through which we can wander, without agenda, as through the light-filled passageways of notre dame. of course, for a religious person, it’s also very much about community and ritual and refreshing one’s relationship with god and ages past” (“why we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week 1). andrew approached sundays with an uncluttered and open mind. he allowed each sunday to refresh not only his relationship with the lord, but also with his family. he would cook his wife and children a big brunch every sunday. while andrew always made such an effort to keep the lord’s day holy, he also always balanced his career and his faith. in his college days, andrew questioned whether his career could have true meaning. he was a computer science major, who intended to work in business one day. but, computer science is not anywhere near a moral profession, right? you just plug in numbers into a computer all day. also, why was his economics 101 class teaching him to be financially shrewd, but his philosophy course teaching him to be economically selfless? these conflicting ideas plagued his undergraduate studies. but, after watching a documentary on father hesburgh, his entire perspective changed. father hesburgh once noted that “in the wake of vatican ii, catholic universities faced a critical question: was it possible to be both a great university and catholic? i believed it was. as long as there was balance… i was entirely devoted to the church, but i wouldn’t let it stand in the way of education” (“hesburgh'' by jerry barca and christine o’malley moreau fye week 2). andrew embodied the message of father hesburgh, that one could truly discover a balance between the church and education. in fact, he soon found a club at school called cs4 good, a club dedicated to using computer science to solve social problems. he finally understood that his career could have significant social impact, and thus realized computer science was not morally obsolete. he died knowing that his career had true meaning, which very few people can say about their careers. andrew also taught us how to actively search for a career that you truly love. although computer science is a high paying field, andrew did not choose his career based on money. in fact, andrew knew what it meant to fail, over and over again. his career journey was anything but a straightforward process. as stated by the notre dame ccd, “much as we present it with arrows from one step to the next, it’s important to keep in mind that it’s not always linear; these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout your lifetime and you’ll move between stages as you learn and grow” (“navigating your career journey moreau first year experience course” by meruelo family ccd moreau fye week 4 ). through all his different jobs and business (even the ones that failed) andrew knew what it meant to be persistent. he understood that one’s career is filled with constant changes, but with each new change comes newfound growth. this is why his coworkers say he is such a nice person to work with. when i talk with his co-workers, the first thing they mention is his kindness, before they ever mention the high quality of his work. and this is what i believe it means to be a great person. overall, andrew had a perfect connection between his work and faith life. andrew was a man of many friends and relationships, his network extended infinitely. he was always so open to discourse with his friends. for instance, his freshman year of college, he had a serious discussion with one of his closest friends, shane. although shane commented on andrew’s work ethic, shane also noted that at times andrew was too serious or too ambitious (conversation with shane moreau fye week 5). yet, these flaws are not the center of this eulogy. the real message is that andrew was open. he made himself so vulnerable, and this is what allowed him to form so many meaningful relationships. people valued how open he was, emotionally and psychologically. but, one of the most undervalued characteristics of andrew’s life was his ability to self-reflect. he continually was shaping and sculpting his beliefs, always in search of a greater truth. he was always developing his skills, his values, and his relationships. as dr. eurich describes, “asking why can sometimes cause our brains to mislead us. let’s say i ask you to list all the reasons why your relationship is going the way it is. and let’s say that last night, your spouse stayed out at the office happy hour later than planned, leaving you alone to cook dinner for your visiting, rather dull in-laws. because of something called the ‘recency effect,’ this could be your most salient thought about your relationship, so in reply to my question, your brain may misdirect you to the first available explanation” ( “the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich moreau fye week 6). andrew understood the true meaning of this excerpt. he did not let smaller, recent effects contribute to his overall well-being. instead, andrew would reflect on the bigger picture, aware that the human brain often over-emphasizes recent events. as many of us know, later in his life he became very involved with meditation and mindfulness. such self-reflection allowed for a continual refinement of his character. moreover, his movement to convert corporate america towards meditation reflects his dedication to such concepts. still, andrew knew that true happiness could not be found by a few minutes of meditation or deep breathing. he knew true happiness relied on your connection with others. pope francis once noted that “many of us, nowadays, seem to believe that a happy future is something impossible to achieve… happiness can only be discovered as a gift of harmony between the whole and each single component” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week 7). while andrew was heavily influenced by self-reflection, his ultimate path towards happiness lied in his friendships. as pope francis describes, happiness requires a harmony between all our different components, our friends, within our lives. we are only as strong as our weakest link. andrew had relationships in the basketball world, relationships with special needs individuals (as https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/serial_position_effect#recency_effect https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/serial_position_effect#recency_effect he worked with best buddies), relationships with coworkers, but most importantly he had the most pure relationship with his family. the plethora of relationships is what made andrew such a happy individual. overall, three major things defined andrew’s life: his work, his faith, and his friendships. and yet, he never sacrificed one for another. he will be missed dearly by his wife and 3 kids. i will end on andrew’s favorite quote by forrest gump: “mama always said life is like a box of chocolates: you never know what you’re gonna get”. article links: week 1: https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ week 2: https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-858 1-ab9500c9ecd9 week 3: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html week 4 :https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ week 5: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/ edit week 6: (week 7 on next page) https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9 https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/edit https://docs.google.com/document/d/1o35zwlphlktu9ewqg_ae2-v9j8s3mnwb6zeezbshja8/edit https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ week 7: https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_inc ludes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript https://www.ted.com/talks/his_holiness_pope_francis_why_the_only_future_worth_building_includes_everyone/transcript schrage capstone integration life is full of opportunities and it is up to each individual to decide which opportunities we take and what we do with it. despite differing opportunities and ideals, “the goal of anyone’s life is to have a life well-lived. however, that means very different things depending on the person” (“personal mission statement” by daniel schrage moreau fye week thirteen). for myself, a life well-lived involves a fulfilling career, a loving family, and helping others reach their version of a life well-lived. i want to find a career path that allows me to pursue my passions while helping to advance society. for myself, “i have always believed that when i find something i am truly passionate about, i jump fully into it and get very excited about it” (“week five qqc” by daniel schrage moreau fye week five). this is why i want to find a career where i am fully engaged and can enjoy my work every day. in addition, i want a loving family including a wife and kids. i want to be able to pass down everything i have learned and achieved to my family to create a successful and loving family for the future. finally, i believe it is very important to help others achieve their goals because some people are not blessed with the same opportunities as everyone else. people are often left out due to the social class they are born in, but “we are trying to create one nation. it could very possibly be that we are verging through our institutions towards two societies, one black and one white, and that wouldn’t be america i don’t think” (“hesburgh” by father hesburgh moreau fye week two). as father hesburgh said, we need to support each other in order to create one united society. throughout my next 3 years at notre dame, i hope to pursue my dreams for a life well-lived even though it may be difficult. the most obvious thing to figure out in college is my career choice, which i have not figured out quite yet. however, i understand that “career satisfaction/success depends in part on how well a person can identify and implement his/her career self-concept, which is comprised of your values, interests, personality, and skills” (“navigating your career journey” by notre dame moreau fye week four). i need to take my personal values and beliefs and test them through different courses and experiences at notre dame to figure out what it is i want to do with my life. in my pursuit of this, i hope the university can help me better understand the bigger picture of my life because “it’s easy to feel as if we’re standing two inches away from a huge canvas that’s noisy and crowded and changing with every microsecond. it’s only by stepping farther back and standing still that we can begin to see what that canvas (which is our life) really means, and to take in the larger picture” (“we need to slow down our lives” by pico iyer moreau fye week one). i believe that involving myself with the notre dame community and finding role models within it will help me gain a better perspective on my life and what i want to do with it. i believe that no one achieves anything in this world alone. that is why i will work to surround myself with people with similar life goals to myself because “we all need each other, none of us is an island, an autonomous and independent ‘i,’ separated from the other, and we can only build the future by standing together, including everyone” (“why the only future worth building includes everyone” by pope francis moreau fye week seven). it can be easy to feel alone in this world, but i need to understand that there are always people to help, which further explains my desire to surround myself with people that support my life goals. i will try to find these people through gateway, my major, clubs, or any other way i can get to know people. i have talked a lot about surrounding myself with people that will support me, but the more important part of it is that i surround myself with open-minded people who are not going to create a toxic environment around me. “as should be clear, echo chambers are more dangerous than bubbles partly because of their ability to lock us into certain world views, but the two are closely related. bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by paul blaschko moreau fye week eleven). i want to include myself in a group that supports myself while also listening to others and what they have to say. choosing my friends in college is very important because if i choose poorly, i could become encapsulated in a bubble that does not allow anyone to grow, including myself. the natural human instinct is to help others, but sometimes we must learn that sometimes we need to accept help and advice as well. for example, steve reifenberg said about his mission trip, “even though i had landed on their doorstep with plans to be “their helper,” they accompanied me, and during those first two years and the many intervening ones, i think i have learned – and am still learning– to accompany them as well” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). while i have been talking a lot about friends i surround myself with, family is truly more important than that. i want to spend my time in college finding and nurturing a relationship for the future to create a healthy, loving family. family is a deeper bond than friendship and i hope to be able to take a step forward towards starting my own family while at college. this does not mean that i want to have a family in college. however, i want to figure out what is important to me in a girlfriend or wife and find someone who makes me happy, which could be the start of a family in the future. i think family is very important because “as disciples of jesus we stand side by side with all people. like them we are burdened by the same struggles and beset by the same weaknesses; like them we are made new by the same lord’s love; like them we hope for a world where justice and love prevail” (“mission” by congregation of holy cross moreau fye week twelve). i also want to become a better member of the community, which is why i want to involve myself in activities on campus at notre dame to help widen my world view. there are many problems plaguing this world and i want to help in the fight against them. “we experience a challenge to our racial worldview as a challenge to our very identities as good, moral people. it also challenges our sense of rightful place in the hierarchy. thus, we perceive any attempt to connect us to the system of racism as a very unsettling and unfair moral offense” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by robin diangelo moreau fye week ten). the most important part of my college experience is that i actually experience life. i want to use these next 3 years to grow as a person. i can only do that if i live in the moment instead of thinking and stressing about the big moments in my life. “we can spend endless amounts of time in self-reflection but emerge with no more self-insight than when we started” (“the right way to be introspective” by tasha eurich moreau fye week six). self -reflection is not always what we want to do. it is important to be self-aware, but also to avoid overthinking our lives. that is why i want to live my life the way ruth graham said it, which is that “my life is going to end, and i have a limited amount of time. we naturally tend to think of our lives as kind of continuing and continuing” (“meet the nun who wants you to remember you will die” by ruth graham moreau fye week three). i want to live my life in the moment while i am at college. i need to avoid being bogged down by my own thoughts and allow myself to grow and learn who i am. throughout my next 3 years at college, i want to surround myself with good people who help me grow as a person. i also want to use these opportunities to grow myself as a member of the community as well as a member of my own family. most importantly, however, i want to live my life the way that makes me the happiest, which i can only do by avoiding overthinking and choosing to live in the moment. capstone integration moreau first year experience professor wagner 29 april 2022 journeying into the unknown mission statement: i believe that: 1. i am embracing courage by facing my fear of the unknown. 2. i am loved and cherished by family and friends. grades do not define me. 3. i am a child of god, and he will protect me as i grow in mind and spirit. 4. how much money i make does not define my success. rather, looking back on my life and feeling fulfilled with my actions and choices is. 5. it is important not to ask what you can do for yourself, but rather what you can do for others. 6. taking down my barriers and being vulnerable with others will help me form healthy, meaningful relationships. 7. the first step to responding to the suffering of others is simply letting them know you are there for them. 8. embracing humanity means holding out your hand and walking together with someone towards a better future. 9. i can grow in wisdom by actively listening to someone else’s opinion, even if i do not agree with or understand it. 10. it is my responsibility to others to promote better mental health on campus. 11. acting with courage means standing up for what you believe in. in the mission statement i created last week for moreau, i recalled key ideas that i have come to believe over this semester (“writing a personal mission statement activity” moreau fye week thirteen). i found that while creating it, many of the thoughts i expressed in it align with the beliefs that i included in my second moreau integration at the end of last semester, including the idea that i deserve to be loved and cherished by my family and friends and that i am facing my fear of the unknown. i believe that my mission statement accurately describes how i want to orient my life, as it includes morals and goals that are important to me and that i wish to fulfill as i continue to grow in mind and spirit throughout the next three years. the first line of my mission statement explains how i believe i embrace courage by facing my fear of the unknown. i have always been a more timid and reserved person, and prefer being in the know rather than encountering surprises along the way. when i first arrived at notre dame, everything was new, and that terrified me. i was afraid of my professors, nervous that the new people around me would not find me worthy of their attention or time, and anxious about the material i was learning in my classes. last semester, i filled my time with studying, often https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ur4b9ofy7mh8adnrwrtifcanuijuai6wnaczkxw-h3i/edit overworking myself and putting myself in a terrible mental state in the process. i was unhappy with my new life and contemplated how i would be able to make it through four years at a place that was making me so miserable. coming back from winter break, i was determined to start making an effort to be happier and reach out to those around me, and that is exactly what i did. i took a step back from fixating on my academics, focusing on my mental health and happiness instead. i also focused on appreciating the small things, even amongst the bad, and using courage to face my fear of the unknown. like pico iyer states in his “why we need to slow down our lives,” the need for an empty space, a pause, is something we have all felt in our bones; it’s the rest in a piece of music that gives it resonance and shape” ("why we need to slow down our lives" by pico iyer, ted moreau fye week one). i have tried to incorporate this rest into my everyday life at notre dame, and i have found that it has strengthened my drive and commitment to school while not leaving me burnt out. additionally, even my friends have noticed how by taking breaks, i am no longer as fearful of the unknown, which i believe will help me remain content at the university throughout the next three years. instead, i take each day as it comes, looking at it as a new opportunity to grow. i stress about the future, but to a lesser degree, and i recognize the beauty that comes with the small moments in everyday life, such as grabbing lunch with a friend or appreciating the beauty of nature. i have also tried to practice recalling the message of the nun who emphasized “memento mori,” a latin phrase meaning “remember your death.” when i think of this concept, i “intentionally think about [my] own death every day, as a means of appreciating the present and focusing on the future” ("meet the nun who wants you to remember that you will die" by ruth graham, ny times moreau fye week three). while it is scary to do so, i have found that it pushes me to find one good moment in everyday life. i no longer go to bed crying or sad, rather i feel fulfilled with the day when my head hits the pillow, knowing that i tried to make the best out of it. the second line of my mission statement shows that i believe i deserve to be loved and cherished and that one bad grade on a test does not define me. throughout the semester, i have had to work on constantly reminding myself that a grade on a test does not define my self-worth. rather, it is my actions towards others and how i treat those around me that do. i grew up in a small home, with just my mother, father, and dog in the house with me. while some may think that this might be lonesome for a child, i never doubted that i was loved or cherished. my parents put me first, and i knew that i was supported, even if my support group was small. coming to notre dame, i was afraid to enter a new place where i did not know anyone and where my family was so far away. i was trapped in a terrible mental state the first few months because i placed so much emphasis on grades and not enough on my happiness or building friendships in my new environment. i continuously asked myself why i was so sad, and why i felt the way i did when so many of my friends were so happy at their colleges. this semester, however, i took a piece of advice from tasha eurich, attempting to understand how “why questions are generally better to help us understand events in our environment and what questions are generally better to help us understand ourselves” (“the right way to be introspective (yes, there’s a wrong way)” by tasha eurich, ted conferences moreau fye week six). by attempting to discover what i https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://ideas.ted.com/why-we-need-a-secular-sabbath/ https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://www.nytimes.com/2021/05/14/us/memento-mori-nun.html https://ideas.ted.com/the-right-way-to-be-introspective-yes-theres-a-wrong-way/ was feeling instead of why i was feeling it, i found that i was lonely and scared of failure. i was placing too much emphasis on something that does not truly define a life well-lived. this semester, i have been open to new friendships, and i have made friends from all different backgrounds that have admittedly made me excited for the next three years of school. now, when i study, i do so in the presence of my friends. this might not always be the best for my grades, but it makes me enjoy learning, and i find crafty ways to remember the material while making my friends laugh. coming from miami, i was used to diversity, and if i’m being honest i thought that notre dame would lack this diversity. however, i soon realized that just because someone is the same race or ethnicity does not mean they are the same. many of my new friends have similar backgrounds, but it is their life experiences that have shaped them as a person, not their race. looking back, i am reminded of marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school, and his advice on attempting to get to know those around you with an open mind. like marcus advised, i have made the effort to “get to know people who differ from [me]” this semester, making a “conscious decision and effort to expand [my] circle” (“dean g. marcus cole: 'i am george floyd. except, i can breathe. and i can do something.” by marcus cole, dean of notre dame law school moreau fye week twelve). this includes people in my dorm, classes, and even at social events. throughout my journey at notre dame, i hope to continue getting to know those around me by entering into fulfilling relationships with those i would have probably never met if i hadn’t reached out. additionally, i plan to continue surrounding myself with friends when i study, in the hopes that i no longer find the practice unbearable and eventually find joy in learning again throughout the next three years. in the third line of my mission statement, i stated that i believed i was a child of god and that he would protect me as i grow in mind and spirit. i have struggled with my relationship with god for a while. i grew up in a church-going family that attended mass every sunday. however, as i got older, i no longer attended church with my family, nor did i pray daily. when i was accepted to notre dame, i had hoped that the catholic spirit here would rekindle my faith and that by having mass so easily accessible i would start attending again. however, i soon found out that this was not the case. rather, i had to make a conscious effort to even make it to mass in the first place, now swamped with college work that i was not accustomed to. i found it even harder to get in touch with my faith than it was when i lived with my parents, as my family had always encouraged me to embrace my relationship with god. during the “week five discernment conversation activity,” i had a conversation with my mother about my faith and religion, and how i was struggling amid the hard classes. she told me that “it's not about being the brightest or the best, it's about not giving up and believing god will give you the strength to carry on” ("week five discernment conversation activity" moreau fye week five). i went into the second half of this semester determined to take her advice, making an active effort during lent to find time in my daily life to make room for god. this included reflecting on my blessings, such as my family, friends, and education. i found that i felt more relaxed and supported when i took a step back and reminded myself that there was something bigger than myself out there. i might be challenged as i continue on my journey at notre dame with hard https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://law.nd.edu/news-events/news/dean-g-marcus-cole-i-am-george-floyd-except-i-can-breathe-and-i-can-do-something/ https://docs.google.com/document/d/1yz7hqvx-u4euw2nlk-frbwfiurqm1mzv_kpoeein4so/edit and challenging classes, such as physics, biochemistry, and the eventual mcat. while i would usually fall into a dark hole of self misery, i believe that by maintaining my faith and choosing to trust that god will lead me to where i’m meant to be over the next three years. with his help, i will make it through, even if i am journeying into the unknown. the fourth and fifth lines of my mission statement focused on the idea that money is not everything and that asking what you can do for others is better than asking what you can do for yourself. for the fourth line, i focus on the idea that how much money i make does not define my success, but looking back on my life and feeling fulfilled with my actions and choices do. i was inspired to incorporate this idea into my mission statement after completing the third integration assignment for moreau, where we were required to write our own eulogy (“integration three assignment: write your own eulogy” moreau fye week eight). i found that when writing my eulogy, i did not focus on how successful or well-off i was, rather i based my assessment on the quality of my character, reflecting on how i interacted with others. i believe that this being part of my mission statement will encourage me to continue emphasizing the relationships i have with others and my interactions with people i do not know rather than monetary value. i also believe that i will pursue a career in something that inspires me as a result, choosing to follow my passions instead of a desire for money. i still don’t know exactly what i want to be, but i hope that i will find my niche. while doing this, i try to keep in mind what i read on the meruelo family center for career development: the fact that finding my passion and future career is not always a linear process and that these steps don’t take place in a nice, neat order. rather, “it’s a developmental process that will recur throughout [my] lifetime and [i’ll] move between stages as [i] learn and grow” ("navigating your career journey” by meruelo family center for career development moreau fye week four). while this may be hard to put into practice throughout my years here, i hope that at the end of my time here, i am satisfied with where i have ended up, and have built meaningful and loving relationships with those around me. for the fifth line of my mission statement, i was also inspired by my eulogy assignment. while i admit that it is important to put yourself first mentally and physically, i believe that you should reach out to others less fortunate than you when you are in the position to do so. i had mentioned in previous assignments that i do not believe god judges you based on your attendance to mass, but rather your actions as a person towards others. i still believe this, and i think that being a good samaritan towards others will not only help them but will reward you with the knowledge that you used your power as a force for good in a crumbling world. over my next three years at notre dame, i plan to join the medlife club of notre dame, in an attempt to give back to communities that cannot afford appropriate health care for their residents. i have been on a mission to loma vieja in the dominican republic, and seeing the reality of the members of the village moved me and inspired me to hopefully one day make a difference in not only their lives but the lives of those in similar circumstances. by committing myself to this goal for the next three years, i hope that one day i will be a force for good and give back to those who have not had the opportunity to receive an education of substantial quality of life. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1skhkzzimh2uwjauu5j_yq76rgv0gcg_lvd8kpbltff0/edit?usp=sharing https://undergradcareers.nd.edu/navigating-your-career-journey---moreau/ lines six, seven, and eight of my mission statement touch on the importance of relationships in my life, being beneficial both to myself and the other person in it. line six will serve to remind me that taking down my barriers and being vulnerable with others will help me form healthy, meaningful relationships while i am here at notre dame. this is something i struggled with during the first semester, but by opening up to girls in my dorm i have built friendships that i hope will last until even after graduation. as much as i regret admitting it, i have sometimes let my judgment get the best of me and have judged others before i have even gotten to know them. i remember reading a few pages out of fr. greg boyle’s “tattoos on the heart” and being moved by his ability to accept others different than him without a second thought. to live out line seven of my mission statement, i hope to take a piece of advice from fr. boyle: “close both eyes: see with the other one. then, we are no longer saddled with the burden of our persistent judgments, our ceaseless withholding, our constant exclusion. our sphere has widened, and we find ourselves, quite unexpectedly in a new, expansive location, in a place of endless acceptance and infinite love” ("chapter 8: jurisdiction" by fr. greg boyle, s.j., tattoos on the heart moreau fye week seven). i loved this explanation at the end of chapter eight of his book, and it has stayed with me as i go throughout my everyday life at notre dame. i have expressed difficulty with my roommate before, but after reading this, i have recognized her differences from me as a part of her character. it does not make her a terrible person, rather it invites me to widen my sphere and accept her into my jurisdiction. while i am not living with her next year, i plan to remain friends with her, as i truly think that she is a sweet girl. line eight recalls how i believe that embracing humanity means holding out your hand and walking together with someone towards a better future. i would have to say that i have always had trouble accepting help, often feeling indebted to the person or judged for showing any signs of weakness. just last week, i was crying in my biology lab over a math test and my friend offered to help me study. at first, i was hesitant to accept his help. however, i remembered a piece of advice from a reading we had completed from professor steve reifenberg, this stated that “one cannot accompany without being accompanied, in the same way, someone cannot be a good friend without being open to friendship” and that “this requires a great deal of humility” (“teaching accompaniment: a learning journey together” by professor steve reifenberg moreau fye week nine). i wound up accepting his help and did well on the math exam. during the next three years here at notre dame, i hope to practice refraining from judging others, choosing instead to incorporate them into my jurisdiction. additionally, i plan to accept as much help as i give, keeping in mind that accompaniment is a two-way street. in line nine of my mission statement, i expressed the belief that i can grow in wisdom by actively listening to someone else’s opinion, even if i do not agree with or understand it. this was inspired by the material we covered in class after listening to paul blaschko’s “ how to avoid an echo chamber.” i remember watching the video and thinking about how it applies to interactions on campus. i realized that there were divisions among the student population regarding certain topics and that often students were severely divided over issues like politics, race, and other polarizing topics. while at first, i just considered these divisions to be bubbles of https://canvas.nd.edu/courses/40253/files/523815?module_item_id=167944 https://docs.google.com/document/d/1hzbsdvimfn2hzdqmrdl96dzcnothuf6c-lg3sh-rs30/edit people, i realized after watching blaschko’s video that “bubbles become echo chambers when groups give up on tolerating diversity of opinion” (“how to avoid an echo chamber” by dr. paul blaschko, thinknd moreau fye week eleven). throughout my journey at notre dame, i hope to keep this in mind and actively work towards listening to the voices and opinions of others who i do not necessarily agree with, in an attempt to avoid falling into an echo chamber. i hope that taking social psychology classes over the next three years will aid me in this practice, giving me an insight into why some people think what they do. lines ten and eleven focus on my responsibility to others and acting with courage to follow what i believe in. i have realized over the semester that my education at notre dame puts me in a position where i will be able to make a difference in the world when i am older and that it is my responsibility to others to use this education for good. specifically, i want to become an advocate for mental health on campus. however, this also takes courage to do. still, i was inspired by figures like father hesburgh and dean g. marcus cole, who both displayed courage and lived up to their responsibility to others, portraying that we are all human beings and all deserve an equal quality of life. i know that different races and ethnicities have been a sore spot for generations, and i think that this is mainly because people try to ignore the issue and shush controversial conversations. as a cuban american at notre dame, i have witnessed my culture being appropriated for “mexican” dorm parties, which i believe to be completely inappropriate. however, the issue is not talked about, as it often makes those who do not have a hispanic background uncomfortable when confronted. however, as i’ve learned in moreau this semester, “the antidote to white fragility is on-going and life-long, and we “can begin attempting to understand the racial realities of people of color through authentic interaction rather than through the media or unequal relationships” (“why it’s so hard to talk to white people about racism” by dr. robin d’angelo, adapted from huffpost moreau fye week ten). i know that people of color on this campus feel alienated or isolated sometimes, and i hope to reach out to people who feel this way, as father hesburgh had done. while watching the “hesburgh” movie by jerry barca, i thought that an important quote that showed how passionate and committed father hesburgh was to his goal of achieving equal rights for all people regardless of race was: “what father hesburgh did by grasping martin luther king’s arms that day is he said this is a partnership in america. civil rights are not just about black americans, it's about all of us and what we are, what are our qualities, what are our values as human beings” ("hesburgh" by jerry barca and christine o'malley moreau fye week two). father hesburgh was unafraid to challenge standard social norms, having the courage to stand up for what he believed was right. i hope to do the same throughout my education at notre dame, as well as after college, in regards to mental health. while i did not get the commissioner position for mcwell in flaherty, i hope to be a supportive resource for incoming freshmen throughout the next three years so that they know that they are not alone. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gaivxqcqnls&t=1s https://docs.google.com/document/d/1bdvnfldrjujhd-4utyb_kfrpcfgoooey7o1wt8_d3iw/edit https://notredame.hosted.panopto.com/panopto/pages/viewer.aspx?id=10159379-7eca-4549-8581-ab9500c9ecd9